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vamp1reheart · 15 days ago

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•°Shadow of light°• 01

Notices: This book contains violence, explicit sexual content, verbal and non-verbal abuse, war scenarios, Conflicts, depression and suicide, toxic relationships, obsessive themes, and others... This book is a Taehyung x female reader fanfic, However, I do not own BTS and I have no intention of offending anyone with this story!

Note: Initially this book was not supposed to become a fanfic, it is an original book of mine that is still being created. Turning this book into a Taehyung fanfic was a request from a friend of mine, so I hope you like it. I might be able to post the original version of the book, but it will all depend on how people react to this fanfic (the book is a bit different from the fanfic, don't worry ;)

Preview:"She was known as the sun, always with her bright smile and her admirable kindness."

"He was known as the moon, cold, dark and in his coat were the most precious stones."

"But the moon does not shine without the light of the Sun, and that is something he did not count on."

Footsteps echo through the large, dark, cold castle. Sara knew exactly who they belonged to, unlike the other footsteps, these were smaller and lively. Not like ogres, as Sara used to call them.

His suspicions are confirmed when two little girls enter the large room he was in.

"Your Sara, can you tell us the story again?"

They didn't need to specify the story, they only knew one, and honestly Sara already thought that was a lot.

The court would kill her if they found out she was teaching fairy tales to children.

Sara accepts, she closes the big, heavy door to the dark room and asks the girls to sit down.

Then seeing their anxious faces, Sara begins...

"This is the history never told, the history that should never be told...that's why we'll keep it a secret!"

Sara says in a low tone, and the children in front of her silently nod and settle in to listen to her History.

"She was known as the sun, always with her bright smile and her admirable kindness."

"But he was known as the moon, cold, dark and his clothes had the most precious stones."

Sara looks into the innocent eyes of the two children in front of her. She would never tell the real story, She couldn't end the dream of true love.

But she and everyone who knows the true story knows the dangers it carries.

The white snow sank beneath his hurried footsteps.

His lungs burned painfully as he tried to turn the cold air into warm air.

She was running...

But whose?

From the one who swore he was the only one worth it.

Through the great trees she hears his dangerous voice.

"Why are you running?! You know it's true!..."

The voice was loud within the silent forest, she didn't know where it came from, she didn't know if he was close, but she had to keep going.

"My love, please! Don't break my heart with your selfishness!"

"(Y/N)!"

I look up from the book I'm reading to look at my aunt.

She comes towards me in a hurry.

"How many times do I have to tell you not to read! Especially here."

She speaks practically in a whisper, but from her tone, I know she's angry.

She is referring to the tree I usually stay under, I like to read under it, it calms me down. But unfortunately the tree is quite close to the red wall.

When the reign of the first King Kim began, he separated the people, leaving the richest on one side of the wall and the poorest on the other. They say he was a greedy man, who said that even knowledge should be only for the rich.

He raised his children with this mindset, which caused our kingdom to be filled with misery.

That is of course until the lower class revolts.

I don't know what happened anymore, Aunt Miranda never wanted to tell me what was going on on the other side of the wall. She He just says that I should never go near him.

"Sorry auntie, but I needed a moment of silence."

I tell her as I mark the page in my book and let Aunt Miranda guide me back to the small house in the distance.

We live in a house far from the village.

But because it's close to the wall, it's cheaper. After all, no one wanted to be close to the red wall.

We don't have much money, and I know Aunt Miranda feels bad about that. Sometimes I catch her crying at night asking God to give her a better opportunity.

But I'm grateful to her, even though I'm close to the terrible wall, she always does her best to keep me happy and safe.

"Eat your soup and go to sleep."

She says closing the various padlocks on the wooden door.

She was afraid of something, but she never says what, and she always gets irritated when I ask too much.

"Yes aunt"

"And don't go out at night to go for a walk!"

She says again, every night, the same thing.

When night came, Aunt Miranda became another woman, she seemed more scared...or something like that.

I always thought it might have something to do with my parents.

She never spoke of them, and I only have vague memories of them.

I know it was my mother who taught me to read. And I know that if they found out she would be killed.

But if she was killed for reading, why wasn't I?

Questions and more questions are always swirling around my head, and I'm starting to get tired, I need to find out.

Restless, I turn over in my bed, through the window I can see the moon shining.

Just below, you could see the great wall in the distance.

Even though I wanted to find out the truth, I knew I would never be able to get past.

The next day, when the sunlight illuminates the room, I get up.

I know that Aunt Miranda gets married a lot, and tends to wake up later, so I like to help her with household chores.

Right away I grab the big basket of dirty clothes and leave the house to wash them.

I always wash my clothes in a stream in the forest.

I don't care about the distance, I like to admire the forest with its incredibly tall trees and exotic animals.

Leaving the basket on the edge of the lake, I jump from stone to stone to avoid getting wet, and put my hands in the water.

Calm but agitated, transparent but bluish.

Nature is full of differences and similarities. Just like human beings.

I'm pulled from my thoughts when a loud noise echoes behind the trees.

Could it be a bear?

There shouldn't be any bears in this region.

The noise gets louder, sounding like it's getting closer.

My chest feels like it is being pulled down, at an abnormal pressure.

It must be fear, it can only be fear.

I've never felt anything like this.

I jump over the rocks again, pick up the laundry basket, and run towards my house.

Whatever it was, I wouldn't want to know.

Night has come again.

But unlike other nights, I don't think about answers, I don't think about the wall.

I just think...

What was that?

The noise was too loud to be a bear.

And that pressure, I've never felt anything like it.

Shit

I need to know what it is.

Getting out of bed, I put on a cape to have some protection on my body.

I open the window and without thinking twice I jump.

Landing on my feet in the grass, I look out at the forest I love to stay in.

She was dark, So dark...

But I can't think too much.

I quickly head towards the forest, looking up, I can see the stars shining over the black trees.

And again, without even realizing it, I arrive at the lake.

It was shining with the light of the moon and stars.

It was really beautiful.

And quiet.

It doesn't seem like the loud noise was made here.

But, I feel watched.

Looking around, I see nothing. But I decide to take the risk.

"Is anyone there?!"

I scream in the middle of the dark forest.

"show up!"

I don't know what the fuck I'm doing, I'm just doing it.

"You shouldn't scream like that, you'll attract predators..."

A deep, calm voice says this in my ear.

Close, very close.

Turning around quickly a tall man is looking straight at me.

How did he get so close!?

He was tall, with hair as dark as night and his eyes, black, without even a sparkle in them. His clothes were different, they were equally dark, but the jewels and gold on them gave him away. He was rich, definitely.

But how did he get over the wall?

A mocking smile is placed on his lips.

"What's wrong? Scared, honey?"

He was scary, but he had a stunning beauty, I didn't know who he was, or how he got here.

But I wanted to know... I really wanted to.

"the cat got your tongue?"

He pauses and looks me up and down.

"I understand, poor thing, are you scared, dear? Afraid of me? Why? Do you know who I am?"

He approaches my frozen body, I didn't know if it was fear, nervousness or shock. But he doesn't care.

His hand runs towards my hair, tucking it behind my ear. He brings his face close to mine, and whispers in my ear.

"It's time for you to wake up, darling..."

When he says this, darkness takes over my vision and I don't feel anything anymore...

Continued...

(Not reviewed! Sorry for any mistakes!)

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uwu-fangurl · 1 year ago

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[Bts Naver Post] Us, Ourselves & Bts

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danceyreagan · 4 months ago

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Public Service announcement. For the kpop fandom.

If Archive-aesthetics, or Eroticimaginationn, reaches out to you with a sob story about constantly being blocked on the internet and not making friends, beware!

She claims people are being fake, when they dont respond to her. She was mad at one person, comes in my DM’s talking shit. Then insulting me, and harassing me. All things you can see in the pictures.

There is a reason people are continuing to block this person. Do not engage. Just report and block her or whatever accounts she creates to inbox you nonsense.

Be smart, take screenshots, respond in your ask box so your followers can see this persons true colors and know to block them as well. Thats the only way to take their power away. They want an audience. Don’t give it. Continue to live your life.

She has created a new account dedicated to hating on Brownsugarbaybee, who is a gem of a human. Im convinced this is a teenager, bored on summer vacation.

Keep it tight fandom. Love, peace, and Lightsticks.

#Kpop #kpop fanfic #kpop fandom #seventeen #bts #BTS Army #bangtan sonyeondan #bts jungkook #bts x reader #bts x black reader #svt x reader #svt x black!reader #Svt x Ambw #BTS x Ambw #S. Coups #TXT #tomorrow x together #black fanfic writer #black fanfic reader

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jiminsass-istant · 10 months ago

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IT'S NOT ABOUT THE HICKEY

This post was triggered by an anon moving around in these spaces trying to explain away the hickey/bite moment as something trivial. I will save my thoughts on the hickey for the end of this post.

First of all, to that anon- Get off your high horse. Not being a shipper doesn't make you superior. You are probably one of those cringey people cancelling queer armies on tw!tter these days. Now readers, sip your drink as you read this short think piece-

OT7 Captains in the fandom bubble:-

I really don't get the superiority complex of so called OT7s who love to live inside this cute little bubble they have created for themselves or as they call it nowadays:- " a curated tl". Cancelling people everyday and actually driving people away from the fandom. Every bio says "multis, solos, shippers dni". What are you afraid of? Little pixels? I have personally followed solo fbs of all members and boy the things I have found! They can get extreme at times, but it takes 2 minutes to fact-check their claims and draw your own conclusion.

I follow wholesome ship pages too, they are a great way to not miss out cute moments between various duos. If you are blocking them out, you'll be swept into whatever the OT7 decide the important interactions are. 🤷

Have y'all watched 'The Social Dilemma' on Netflix? I would actually want all bts fans to give it a watch. A very prominent tech figure admitted that she follows a good number of Tw!tter accounts that disagree with her to ensure that she gets to see all sides and all opinions. When you deliberately 'curate' a timeline to feed only your opinions, to make a 'safe' space that doesn't trigger you, without letting new thoughts penetrate it..THAT! That's the beginning of a cult.

Army is not a cult for defending BTS or for calling out billboard and other big authorities, but army is indeed a cult with the way they move against people within the fandom.

I said what I said.

With a curated 'OT7 captain' timeline, you start internalising things about the artists that the people you follow want to believe:-

1. All true army are OT7 and non shippers. 💫💫

Sure some of them are. But biases exist for a reason, right? If you think people don't run their bias's playlist more than the other 6, you are so deluded. Spotify wrapped'23 was a prime example. With the solo era, the rise of solo fanbases was unavoidable.

2. Your favourites are spotless, impeccable people. 💌💌💌

They are so not. They date, they make mistakes, they hurt people (like we all do). Heck, they might even offend certain groups of people, unknowingly or knowingly. Being ignorant is also a flaw.

3. Everything they say on camera is true.🙊🙊🙊

Everything they say on camera is what they want you to know. As Park Jimin of BTS, as Kim Namjoon of BTS and so on. And yes, your perception of them should be built based on their words alone, but it doesn't mean that you purposefully stay blind in a way that serves your personal projections onto the members. As Jimin once said " please take our words as they are"(Festa 2022). Read between the lines, and you get- "please do not make assumptions about us, please do not project past or future narratives onto us." No matter how much it makes BTS look like a saint, DO NOT paint them as perfect human beings just because they are your idols.

Once you get into the fandom bubble, you start rejecting all opinions that threaten to puncture that perfect bubble. In that process, you end up never getting to know about how some member promotions were horribly managed, how company delayed certain stuff, the obvious company agenda and different business strategies for different members. It's not about victimising members, but calling out the company when they make obvious mistakes. You do not see when hate against a particular member gets aggravated to the point it affects streams and sales.

And musical preference? The way the fandom just collectively decided that if you hate any song except 'ON ft Sia", you are basically an anti. I have no words.. I'll come out and say: I don't like DNA. SORRY JIMIN. Sure it's a great concert song, or maybe at a party, but it's never making it to my down-time personal playlists. Cancel me?

Top Social Artist?

This is my personal opinion. BTS having a huge presence on social media is both a boon and a curse. While it ensures that new fans are made everyday, the bts social media presence is an uncontrolled monster right now. Millions of insta, YT channels- most of them spreading a superficial image of BTS. It's for this reason, there are so many 'fans' out there who just love BTS for the few members and their visuals. I can guarantee you that they don't even know how streaming works, but they'll be sure to have an insta name like "mrs.jeon jungkook". If you made it to this part, I don't need to tell you how certain ships inducted their shippers through these very channels, spreading misinfo about the group dynamics and a completely manipulated idea of the boys, as if it's not real life, but some shitty bl drama.

While the company is obviously doing nothing about this mess, it is YOUR duty to focus on what's important as a fan and participate in projects that plan to counteract this mess. ( Of course only if you have time)

So..what does the hickey have to do with all this?

When you finally grow out of your perfect pure breed OT7 agenda, who considers this group of men a picture perfect family who can do no sin, you'll be ready to view the hickey/bite mark as a normal functioning member of the society who's in touch with reality.

Did I just write "pure breed"..

Let's say the hickey/bite does not actually mean anything intimate in a romantic sense. Sure. Even I think it was probably not an exclusively romantic thing. And this is coming from someone who ships them, but I do not see them as 2 people who are dating each other (because I don't claim to know their personal lives).

An older person biting the neck of a younger person long enough to leave a mark is NOT A NORMAL LEVEL of skinship. For friends, for family, for brothers. And this goes for Korea as well as at a global level. Not only k-jikookers but also k-armies had raised eyebrows when that happened. If you didn't raise your eyebrow at this, you need to go out more, have a social life, hang out with long term friends, idk.

But I'm sure if it was a man and a woman, you would have already declared that they are f@cking.

If you have observed jikook through the years, they have had an abnormal level of skinship that even surpasses skinship within their own group. Reminds me of the Butter photoshoot behind, where JK's hands so naturally slid under JM's crop top, like it was a usual thing. Now if one of them reacted differently or in a goofy way, I'd still brush it under the rug. But what had me scratching my head was the indifference. How close do 2 people have to be, for someone to SEARCH for familiar skin to touch?! Let's not forget how JK always touches JM's neck like a habit, massaging, holding, or just caressing, usually a little inside the collar.

Now if they were a man and a woman, you would have already declared that they are f@cking.

If you don't at the very least, acknowledge that it's an abnormally high level of skinship, and that jikook are at the very least, a highly interdependent, symbiotic, close, 2 souls-1 body entity, the closest duo in bangtan..then you are the delulu here. 🫵

I would advice such anons to stop visiting shipping spaces if you are bringing nothing to the table. (As I always say, opposing views are always welcome as long as you bring receipts and not hate). Maybe spend some time talking to real life people, couples, friends, you know?

#jikook #kookmin #fandom culture #bts army #bts #bangtan sonyeondan

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yoon-topias · 5 months ago

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Yoontopia | Chapter 1 {Ocean Blues}

⟡ Warnings: Strong language, depression, mental health issues, references to self harm, references to violence, references to sexual assault, manic episodes, smoking, risky behavior, jealousy, smut.

⟡ 18+ (minors DNI, some chapters have mature content)

⟡ Best friend's older brother x OC

⟡ Summary:

Min Yoongi has managed to survive with few vices, a best friend he literally couldn't live without, a careful pharmaceutical cocktail, and a private utopia in his mind. It's not perfect, but he's never had any hope for perfect anyway. As far as he was concerned, everything was under control. That is until one little deal with his sisters best friend throws a wrench in his careful chaos and invades the quiet utopia he built for himself. Pineapple lollipops, late night bike rides, aquarium trips, secrets, promises, and uncertainty quickly spiral until Yoongi can no longer tell if he's his utopia. All he can do now is hold on and hope his heaven doesn't burn to hell. Will he make it through his reality and utopia colliding?

6.7k words

Laying in your bed ready to rot another day away after you were broken up with because "you were just a good fuck, a nobody" just in his bed sheets for months and you're a nobody. Shuffling your feet in your sheets it's your weekend from the hustle and bustle of work, working as a lawyer no one saw you going into that field but it peaked your interest in helping people prove their innocence. Your job is taxing so the weekend is for yourself to just let go and be with him, well before you were broken up with. Now you're by yourself yet again, missing your best friend. Never the type to meet new people and yet here you are heart broken, look where it gets you the one time you step out of comfort.

Your door opening throws you off and in walks no other than Min Yoongi. "Oh I gotta change the door code" rolling your eyes. He is in his normal all black attire which consists of black t-shirt, black zip up, either black jeans or leather, and black combat boots. Oh and you can't forget the two silver chains one you bought him and one Hana got him, paired with two rings one silver and one dark purple says it's because he likes the color and his small silver hoops.

"Nice to see you too, Violet. How much longer are you gonna pout, Hana keeps sending me here because clearly you're not taking care of yourself. You forget my sister is crazy and has both of our locations. " You scoff at him and grumble digging further into your bed. He pulls the covers off of you and you look at him in shock and you're upset you just wanna be in your cozy bed all day. "hey! What if I was naked!" He laughs a you "you forget I know you better than everyone, you don't sleep without your purple pajamas with kuromi you had to have years ago" you gasp "because she is me"

"Yeah-yeah keep tellin' yourself that Vi you're a cute purple evil character. I'd love to see it" Vi the nickname he gave you years ago, because Violet was too long to him so now it's Vi. Only getting Violet when he is mad at you or in serious situations.

He sits down on the black small futon with your blanket by his black boots in your room lighting up a cigarette. The way his slender finders pull the Malbro red from the back and places it between his lips and his eyes shut getting the first hit. "How many times do I have to tell you to stop smoking in my room Min Yoongi, you love killing your lungs don't you?"

"I do it's the only way to take the pain away, give me something else to kill the pain with and I'll stop"

Getting off the bed and going up to him to take your blankets back "gimme them Yoon it's loaf time, you can join" pointing at his side of the bed yeah you're just his sisters friend he tells himself yet literally has a place next to you in your bed. Even when you were that asshole who had no right to be with you, but in his head the list of guys he has seen you with will never be up to his standards, the only on that list is him. Min Yoongi.

"No not today, you're getting out of bed and I'm no longer filling those emotions in your head. He was an asshole who never deserved you in the first place, Violet You're the most vibrant soul out there don't let anyone cover those colors you hear me? Now we're going out today to get your shit together. I'll be on the bike. Waiting. Don't keep me waiting Vi"

You wear all black clothes like you normally do and he calls you the most vibrant? Putting on your black jeans, your black cami crop top, a short black jean jacket, and of course can't forget the black and white dunks that Yoongi also has. You may be on the curvy side, it took a lot for you to get comfortable wearing these types of clothes worried about the looks you would get. Hana always said you were gorgeous. You can hear her voice right now "if you have the body show it those curves are like the road map and the more curves the more fun, exciting, and dangerous they are"

Grabbing your backpack off the table in the entryway. You see the picture of you and Hana. You miss her so much. She was the reason you would get out the apartment you used to share it together and now it just feels less homey. Sighing as you open the door and hitting the lock icon on the keypad.

Walking down the steps getting to the building entrance you see the security guard. He is younger but older than you, super nice and has helped you multiple times when you forgot the door code when you got a little too tipsy at the bar after the break up. "Hello Joon, how has the shift been?"

"It's been good. Haven't had a lady forget her door code because she is too hung up on an asshole" rolling your eyes you know no one liked Jackson, but when you're the way you are you learn to settle on no one likes girls like you. Stepping out the door putting on your sunglasses

"Ya know you're gonna have a helmet on take them off, Vi"

You already know that you're gonna have a helmet on, but you can't be bothered by the sun at any time of the day. Sliding them into your backpack pocket. The full black motorcycle you love to ride on. Feels like you get one step closer to heaven on the back of it. "Another one Yoon, are you serious?" He has the cherry burning, taking another puff and exhaling. "Told you when you get something else to fill the void I will" but he knows the only thing that will fill it is you.

He throws it on the ground and stomps his boots over it. Grabs your helmet off the back it's black and your signature purple neon reflective for at night to be seen. He puts it on your head and taps under your chin so he can do up the buckle. "Little miss lawyer what would your colleagues think of you out of work" once it's all done he does the check he always does with you or Hana when you ride with him shaking your head to make sure it's on tight enough. "You're gonna give me a concussion Yoongi." Hitting his shoulder, walking over to the bike as always he gets on first and holds out an arm to give you sturdy grounding to hop on and put your feet on the pegs. Once you're situated on the back he taps your knee to give you the go ahead wrap around. Putting your knees close to his body and that's when you hear the rumble of the bike turn on and it already has you feeling alive.

"For your information my colleagues need to know nothing about me out of work" over the helmet mic and speaker system, wrapping your arms around his waist interlocking your fingers and giving him a tug. He kicks the stand and revs it, that's your warning to hold on. You're off holding onto your best friend's older brother and no idea where you're going. You're along for the ride knowing he isn't going to tell you.

Zooming in and out of cars listening to "Vi's playlist bitches" on the in helmet speakers and of course he has to listen to it too, currently playing a song you just have to yell and Yoongi always hates it because he can't mute you.

Screaming your lungs "bitch I'm going ghost" as you tap on his stomach with him weaving in and out traffic to get to wherever your destination is. "Bitch I'm goin ghost" but what you don't know is Yoongi is in his helmet listening to you have the time of your life smiling knowing you're also smiling under that helmet he may also be mouthing the words so you don't hear him.

It's catchy, okay?

Giving you tap on your right knee you know he is about to make a sharp right turn you brace on to him and move your body right with him as he turns. He is going down a road you haven't been down in forever, the road to the aquarium your sanctuary. Yoongi even bought you a yearly passes so you can go anytime you want every year for your birthday but work has been become your priority and Jackson thought it was stupid and said "you're not a kid Violet"

"Yoon why are we going this way"

"You'll see, Vi" it's a long curvy road you've been on multiple times riding on the back of his bike. "So when you think Han will let me use her bike" he laughs and you wish you could stab him in the stomach but you rather not die. "You think she's gonna let you drive Riot that's never happening."

"And why not?"

"Because you have the stability of a toddler learning to walk, Vi. Just stay backpacking on us"

Backpacking is what it is when someone is on the back of the bike, because you literally are their backpack. You scoff "I'll show you Yoongi"

"I'd love to see it" tapping the left knee and feeling a little squeeze after the turn you're stopping his way of telling you, there is a language you have developed when you ride with him. At a red light he keeps his hand on your knee to keep you in place and you're just singing your lungs out enjoying the feeling you get. It's green, holding on again he makes another turn and taps your right knee. Squeeze when you come to the stop you're at your all time favorite place the aquarium. "What are you waiting for Vi, I know it's been a long time"

Holding his arm out to help you hop off the back and as you do helmet still on waiting for him you take his off and come over to take yours off. He goes into his jeans and pulls the pack out and lights another and inhales. You see the pleasure written over his face with the first inhale. Swinging his leg over and coming to your aid tapping your chin to lift it up to undo the buckle. Once he takes it off he looks at your wide eyes. Seeing the cigarette between his teeth, staring at it, the habit only formed when you were still in high school and he was already graduated. You noticed he became more distant from you and Hana more elusive. Why did he start smoking? "What you starin' at Vi" as he goes to fix your hair, smooths it out for you and pats your head and you're good to go.

"Nothin' Yoon" he nods, understanding you're not gonna tell he knows this. He is not gonna push further. Grabbing both helmets, shoving one in your backpack and he holds his in his hand and starts to walk to the entrance. The cigarette in his other hand hits as he walks. You rush to keep up with him. Why the hell is he going so fast? As you get to the entrance he flicks the bud on the ground smashing it between his boot and the pavement, showing the ticket person both your passes on your phones going to the locker area for pass holders. Putting your backpack and his helmet in one. Ready to see all your friends. Smiling, waiting for Yoongi to hurry up and lock the locker "come on Yoon I haven't seen Lewis in forever" he laughs at you how you think you're best friends with the aquarium's one turtle.

Yoongi Pov:

"Okay, okay I'll go to the restroom and we can go see him wait here" going to the bathroom I just need a breather. God why is today eating me up I have been in her bed for fucks sake it didnt eat me up, but today is the day to eat me up. Splashing some water on my face and looking at myself in the mirror another cig yeah that's what I need maybe I can sneak out, no you can't she hates it. Looking at what I have become just to hold in emotions and pain. it can do a shit ton to a person become an addict but if I'm not addicted to cigs. I'm an addict to Vi.

When my sister told me to check on Vi, it just gave me the excuse to go see her and without a doubt I got out of bed even if it was early, knowing where I was gonna take her. The asshole she was with robbed her from her favorite place on planet earth. That stupid turtle, but if it makes her happy and smiling I'll do anything. One hundred dollars a year for a membership pass to see her smile yeah I'll do it for the rest of my life. Why do I have one? Well to go with her, but also when I'm missing her it fills the void. I want to get her confidence again in herself. Yeah, she is wearing her clothes again rather than sweats, but I see the way her arms hug her stomach trying to hide it.

She has always felt ashamed of her beautiful body, the curves that are a roadmap to her beautiful inside. Vi finally got comfortable a couple years ago and started to dress more for herself rather than for other people. She let that fucker into her life and he broke all the work she did, we did. She no longer takes compliments, no longer dresses for herself, and no longer is confident. I see a shell of the girl who I fell for. One more splash of water on my face, yeah I can do this. I have done it for years. I'm just the best friend's brother.

Walking out the restroom I see her on her phone with one arm covering her stomach "Vi let's go see Lewis we gotta tell Hans how he is doin'." there's the wide smile I'm used to. She is bouncing in excitement to go and see Lewis. I'll do this for the rest of my life if I gotta.

Running around the aquarium literally all day this girl. She can't get enough. She saw Lewis not once but four times when she looped around, and of course FaceTimed Hana to show her Lewis. Hans screamed and said she would be home soon for their child. Of course a day can't go by without her getting a break and she saw Jackson and his new girl walking around and she tried to b-line it out the doors and leave.

"Violet we're not leaving you haven't even seen bubbles. The starfish" . Two years ago you named it that because it was pink like bubble gum.

I know I can't use the words that I want to. Show him I'm better, show the fucker what he's missing. He won't have any choice but to notice to see whos he fucked with, she's with me no one is fuckin' with her. "But, he's here Yoon in my safe place"

"Wait, here okay Vi" she shakes her head, okay I'm gonna have to do this with her wrapped around my arm like she is going to break. Walking up to the bastard "oh, Vi look who it is Jackson" his eyes goes wide yeah that's right fucker. " Oh! Violet so you finally got with your best friends brother I see"

"We're not together Jackson he is taking me to my favorite place that you said was for kids so why are you here? Oh wait are you dating another one who just graduated and you're on a field trip"

Fuck yes that's my girl.

She said enough that the girl wrapped around Jackson is clearly pissed about what she said. "Well you better go enjoy the field trip Jackson and by the way you never deserved Violet" I see her chest moving up and down. She definitely did not plan on that today. "Hey let's go to the viewing circles and take a seat" nodding her head going to the place she'd spent hours. In school she would just come and sit in one and do homework, even in law school in an accelerated program to become one, tired out of her mind often caught her asleep on her books in one of these circles.

She takes a seat in one knees up to her chest lookin at the fish swim around "wanna talk bout' it?" Shaking her head no I understand why she wouldn't wanna talk about it. "I'm so proud of you for standing up to him Vi '' she looks at me as she does one tear falls. "You are Yoon?" the wide sparkling gray eyes I'm so used to, ever since we were kids I always thought they were beautiful and unique. Rare just like her.

"Of course, the world was against you the moment you were born and look at you as a lawyer at twenty four working your way up at the firm. You help people prove their innocence even though you were caught on the side of not innocent growing up with your dad in jail. Your mom barely survived on one income to take care of you. Vi, I'm so fucking proud of the bright young women you've become. Give yourself credit"

She is looking at me with those eyes that could say a million words. Did I go too far bringing up her parents? Fuck. "Hey I'm sorry I brought them up."

She rushes forward to me and wraps her arms around my neck hugging me like her life depends on me. "Yoon, thank you for being proud of me when I have no one in my court." I wrap my arms around her and give her a squeeze. "What about Hana, Ma, Pop and me? You got the four of us always in your court"

You're just the best friend's brother, remember that Yoongi.

She releases me and I see the mascara broken up under her eyes, lashes taking my thumb and rubbing lightly to take away the smudges. "You always been a cry baby" she scoffs at me there is the girl I know. She crosses her arms and right when she does Lewis the turtle is at the circle swimming. "You hear that Lewis he's bullying me" she's now fake crying looking at the fish swimming by. Her legs up to her chest and arms wrapped around her knees. She turns her head and looks at me. "Can we stay for a while Yoon?"

Not like we've already been here since early this morning and now it's already six at night and this girl still has yet to eat. "Whatever you want Vi but I'm going to get you some food. Stay here, got it? Don't go on another lap." nodding her head as I hop out the circle and she turns to just zone into the fish as they swim by.

Walking to the food court my pocket buzzes pulling out my phone it's a text from Hana

Hans: Make sure you take care of our girl, I know you love her as much as I do.

She thinks I wouldn't take care of Vi, I have always done it. Hana figured out my feelings years ago and promised to never tell Vi while I got my head on straight mentally and physically. I struggled with my mental health for years behind closed doors, we even had to lie and say I was at a school overseas for a program when I was actually in a hospital learning how to control my emotions. I finally have a grip on everything and don't hate the world. The one consistent I had was family and Violet. I was young and dumb for not telling Vi about it all but she has her own issues. How could a person with a loving family and perfect life you could ask for be like me? I wondered about myself so I hid it all from her.

Me: You really think I wouldn't take care of her? When she is the main reason I'm living. Sis I love you but know who you're talkin to.

Hana: I know but she has me worried.

Me: I got it. Trust me sis. Look at our location. Also your girl stood up to the asshole. Tell ya about it later getting her food.

Shoving my phone in my pocket again it buzzes again I'll check it later, Hans always has to have the last word. "May I have two slices of cheese pizza and two drinks please" swiping my card, waiting for the food to come out. "You've been visiting a lot recently and finally brought someone with you man" the young cashier says to me nodding my head. Maybe I have been in her sanctuary a little too much recently. Shoving the bottled drinks in my back pockets and holding both triangle pizza boxes in my hands I make my way up the stairs to the viewing area. I see her in the same position I left her staring at the fish swimming by like a little kid in her own world.

"Vi help pizza and coke here." She turns around and smiles grabs the boxes from my hands and sets it in her little circle she already turned in to home until closing for sure, pulling the drinks out my pockets handing one to her she opens it takes one sip makes a face and of course does her habit she shakes the bottle to make it more flat says it's "too spicy" if it's full fizz. Setting down so it doesn't explode and pats next to her for me to sit down. We both ate pizza. Of course I eat her crust because she hates it. I can hear it now "if it's just bread I don't want it the extra carbs I gotta make use of my carbs for the day can't waste them on plain bread" in turn I scoff with that reply anytime I hear it.

Once we eat it's seven at night and tonight is the night they close at eight so we don't have much longer we can stay. "Imma go throw this away I'll be back" there's a trash can close to the circle thank god. I don't wanna waste any time I have with her. One hour. Sitting in my spot looking at the fish swimming by. Without even turning to me she lays her head on my shoulder to get comfortable, yeah she's just my sister's best friend.

"Hey yoon" I hum in response.

"I wish I was a fish"

"If you were a fish I would have to walk around with you in a cup everywhere"

You gasp "I would be a fish like you see in the pet store! Uh. Oh! The beta fish. Their so pretty"

"You are pretty as you are Vi"

She of course doesn't acknowledge the compliment I give her, but that's normal. "You think if we were fish we would be friends, like how people say you're stars in another universe. What if our other universe were fish"

"Well then it looks like we're gonna be fish Vi because our lives are intertwined in every universe I know it." She gives me a smile "yeah we're fish"

"Hey Yoongs, will you ever stop smoking? It makes me nervous for you" fuck how do I explain it keep me sane. It's that rush it gives me that takes me away from my reality. Sometimes even her. "I don't know it's not easy to quit you know that"

"Oh! What if I help you every time you want to smoke you suck on a lollipop" she pulls one out her pocket, of fucking course she has one in her pocket. It's yellow.

"Fine, but if I do this you're getting something out of it. If I compliment you, you have to accept it. You need to learn to love yourself for everything you are that means mentally and physically. Also a sucker just won't do a heads up, but we can try the only other thing that has taken the pain away is kissing and sex."

She looks as if she is thinking we're both adults here and clearly both not virgins in our twenties she knows the power of sexual contact and intimacy. It's been a long time for me but hey maybe a one night stand will do me some good if I'm going to be complimenting the woman I have loved for years.

"You got it, but Yoongi I swear if I see a cig I'm going to kill you."

I would love to be killed by your thighs.

She reaches her hand pinky out and thumb out god this girl and habit. Putting my pinky out wrapping around hers.

"Pinky"

"Swear"

And we both kiss our thumbs and press it together, this will be the closest I ever get to kissing her I'll take it. She looks at me with a smile and looks at the fish again. Does she know what she just signed up for?

Unwrapping the lollipop makes her look at me from the crinkle of the wrapper, it's yellow, must be mango maybe pineapple? Let's see how it tastes. Looking her in the eyes and putting it in my mouth. She is looking at me for some sort of reassurance that it's good. I hum in response. "Maybe it'll work"

Sweet. Sweet. Pineapple. Maybe I can do this for her.

"Hey Yoon" humming in response to her. "There's a stupid office party and we all have to bring someone. Can you go with me because you know?" She doesn't wanna be the only one without someone "of course pretty I'll go with you but I'm not wearing a tux got it?"

"I'm not pretty"

"Miss lawyer what did we just pinky swear on are you breaking the law?"

She rolls her eyes. I'll allow it for now. It's the first compliment. "Thank you Yoon, fine you don't gotta wear a tux, but it's black and white theme"

There is an announcement coming over the speaker that the aquarium will be closing in ten minutes so me and Vi get ready to go and of course she says bye to Lewis not twice but four times. "I'll be back my son, I promise" I laugh at how dramatic she is. "Let's go get our stuff Vi" walking out she even says bye to bubbles even though he is on the other side of the aquarium and we wouldn't make it back in time to the exit. The last thing we need is to lose our passes. Going to the lockers I type in my code 0613 and take my helmet as she does the same code and takes out her backpack. She unzips the bag and takes out the helmet ready to go outside and put it back on. We say our thank yous to the employees and hope they all have a goodnight walking out. There is a light breeze in the air and the stars are already out. The sun must have set early tonight.

"Hey Yoon, look it's us in another universe and Hana!" She is pointing at three lone stars in the sky. Shining bright in the dark sky. "Yeah Vi, it's us" We walk to my bike and she is swinging her arms. I haven't seen her like this in months. It's nice to see her like this again. My bike in view, she holds the helmet out to me so I can put it on her. Once we get to the bike I set my helmet on my seat and she is standing right behind me waiting for me to put her helmet on her. "Vi your eyes will be the end of me" she blinks at me not understanding why I said it I couldn't hold back. Tapping her chin to lift up so I can put her helmet on and buckle it. "There you go, Vi" doing my normal shake on the helmet. I only started it to annoy her. I know I put it on tight enough but now I can't stop. Habits they're hard to break huh?

Getting my helmet on, hoping on my bike I put my arm out to give her the stability she needs to swing her leg over and put them on the pegs. Tapping her knee as they go ahead to wrap around me. I feel her knees come to my sides, arms wrapping around my waist, scooting in closer her body up against my back, and fingers interlock around me. I love giving myself pain don't I? Turning on my bikes hearing the purr of the engine ready to zip in and out of traffic.

I grab my phone and put it on the phone stand, hitting play on Vi's playlist on my phone. Hearing it play on the speakers. "Let's go beautiful" I kick the stand, rev my bike giving her no time to respond to my phrase taking off into the night with the only person I want to be with.

Violet Pov:

I heard what he called me and I couldn't even register it before he took off. Grabbing on to him I hear my playlist start on the speaker zoning into the cars we pass by all the lights at night. It used to be the other way around. I was on the back of Hana and I would be looking at Yoongi drive beside us, oh how time has changed. I feel a left tap preparing to make a turn with him. I lean to the left. "Yoon I don't wanna go home drop me off somewhere" I have one more day off work I can stay out late tonight.

"Ya know already I'm not just dropping you off somewhere, but fine I'll take you somewhere. Hold on, we are going for a little ride. Next turn will be a hard right gotta make this light ahead"

Bracing myself for this turn, I love the night you see all different characters out riding on the back gives me a different perspective of the world. The bars are full, people walking home who got off late, the sex workers, dealers, and buyers. Yeah I may be in the law but it's not my job to be the police is it now? I defend the ones who are wrongly accused, not the ones doing it with intent. Feeling a tap to go right again I latch on more. It feels like tonight will be another full of turns, but that's okay I'm used to it.

"Ready to go fast Vi? Live a little" I give him a squeeze as a yes I'm ready there is an open road no else but the lights on the sides ground, our helmets with mine neon purple, and red on his lighting up the path. The bike makes a loud sound and we're off zooming down the road. I scream as he pops the front tire up and sees the city going by in a blur.

Slowly down to a red light he moves his hand back to my thigh this time not my knee. I see his riding glove and I run my finger across the leather glove.

Why did I just do that?

"Vi, you tryin' to hold my hand? Imma need a lollipop for that"

"You're lucky I'm addicted to sugar I guess"

Wrapping my arms back around him as I hear the rev of the bike. "Well let's go Jagiya" and what you didn't see was Yoongi smirk as he finally got to call you that for the first time ever with no refusal.

Pulling into a spot at the shop where Yoongi works on his bike at, he works part time here. Honestly I don't know how he does it working two jobs and I'm barely able to make it through my one. "Hey I got something to show you" he lifts his arm to help me off and takes his helmet off after I'm off swinging his leg over he comes up to me taps my chin and unbuckles the helmet when it is off he is looking at me and our eyes stare at each other. His cat shaped eyes pull me in and always have they are truly one of a kind.

"I'm gonna be another lollipop Vi, I think I'm a sugar addict"

Eyes still connected I reach my hand back and go into the side pocket of my backpack and grab another lollipop and hand hold it out for him. "Pineapple is all I got" he makes a slow blink and takes it from my hand, unwraps it and looks at my lips and neck to my eyes. "Looks like I know how you taste Vi" putting the lollipop in his mouth and walks towards the shop. I stand there mouth open watching as he walks away after what he just said.

Yeah he's messing with me that's it.

Walking to the shop slowly with my big backpack on my back, I spent many nights here with Hana and Yoongi.

"Yoongi how many times do we have to tell you it is alone time go to the other side of the shop"

"Well you two will break something I know."

Sitting on a little stool with wheels while Hana is working on her bike when they bicker you just let them, no reason to get in the way. Trying to scoot back I tilted the stool a little too much and fell on my ass yep I'm clumsy what can I say.

"Ya! See Vi will be broken by the end of the night if I leave her with you"

Hana scoffs at his words and puts her hand to her chest, offended while Yoongi comes over to me and puts a hand out in my head. I'm too heavy. I can do it myself. "It's fine Yoon I can do it"

"No you're not I'm helping you up miss fall on my ass"

I hear Hana in the back say "she got enough cushion damn that ass is perfection" in turn makes me laugh. Yoongi grabs my hands and helps me up and I get shy about it. "Thanks Yoon, sorry" I start to brush off my pants and and Hana comes behind me and smacks my ass hard "I'll never get tired of it"

"Girls are so weird, do you just go around touching each other's ass and boobs for fun" which makes Hana come around and grab my boob and look him dead in the eyes "Yes, do you not touch your friends balls."

Yoongi looks disgusted at her words "hell no I would never let them touch me. Only people putting their hands on me is a girl, I'm gonna go to the other side but I swear if you break Vi I'm killing you tonight" he puts both his middle and pointer finger in front of his eyes back and pointing between him and her and walks away.

I hear the garage door open "You coming Vi?" I come out of the memory and hum in response to him and walk to the shop he has two bikes parked next to each other his other black racer with red hues and one I haven't seen it's black and purple neon as accents. "You got another one Yoon you gotta slow down you can only ride one at a time"

"And who says it's for me" raising his eyebrow looking at me. "Who has a purple neon helmet in her hand" he points to your hand and your mouth drops open.

Having no words I just go take a seat on the same stool I have fallen off many times. "Well that is if you get me to fully stop smoking Vi, we in this together right you gain confidence and I stop smoking so what do you say?"

You drop your helmet on the ground and look up at him. "Are you serious Yoon"

"Dead serious Violet. You get me to stop, it's yours we can go out in the town and I'll teach you, but that doesn't stop you from riding on the back of mine you're my backpack remember."

"But-but what if I can't do it" you tear up thinking you're not strong enough to help him, hell you barely have the power to do it for yourself right now. He walks for you too and drops to his knees to come to eye level with you. The pad of his thumb wipes your tears away.

"Look like you gotta do everything in your power, Vi you're the strong person I know" looking at his eyes and nodding my head. "Okay okay I can do this for you. Looks like I need more pineapple lollipops. Wait! Do you like other flavors?"

"Pineapple is my favorite Vi"

Yoongi Pov:

She smiles at my answer and nods her head about the pineapple. "Looks like I'm cashing in, I need another" she reaches in her back and grabs another lollipop and opens it for me and puts it up to my mouth to take. I accept it and smirk once it's in my mouth.

Sweet. Sweet. Pineapple.

"Can I go see it Yoon" pointing at the bike I nod my head and stand up holding my hands out for her to take "no I'm good Yoon I'm too heavy" I pull her arms and she stands as I pull. Putting my finger under her chin, those gray eyes looking up at me. "Whoever said that to you it's bullshit you're perfect Violet" nodding her head having to take the compliment I'm sure she'll get used to it.

Walking to the bike she is smiling, running her fingers across the main seat for once, not the back seat looking at me "can I sit?" Walking over to her and grabbing her hand to help her swing her leg over, placing her hands on the tank and smiling down at it. The way her body looks on the bike is a fucking sin. The way her thighs sit around it, her curves in shape with the bike accentuating the beautiful bike but even more the beautiful girl on it. I can picture it riding at night with her red and purple zooming through the night but nothing will replace when she is my backpack "It fits you Vi. let's do this". Taking the lollipop from my mouth holding out my pinky to her she smiles and connects our pinkies going in to kiss our thumbs.

"Pinky"

"Swear"

It's sealed. We have started this journey together.

I'm just the best friend's brother.

Thank you for reading. ₊˚⊹♡

All rights belong to @/Yoon-Topias. Do not copy/ translate.

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zeroclockk · 5 months ago

Text

— ⋆˙⟡ Love Your Feeling || Chapter five

- When JK meets Mom₊˚⊹♡

“Yun, you shouldn’t smoke,” he tries to discuss. “Neither should you, you look stupid,” I tell him,

Pair: jjk x femOC, college students, best friends

Word count: 4.2k

Warning: this chapter includes slight substance use⚠️

masterlist || taglist

!Friends to Lovers, Protective Brother, Secret Dating, Friends with Benefits, Angst, Mature content, Dysfunctional Family, Fluff, Smut, Mentions of Alcoholism and Abuse

——————————————————————₊˚⊹♡

Up, down. Up, down. Up… down… is the pace Jungkook’s chest goes at. It’s one of those moments where you’re mad that you woke up, so you keep your eyes closed in hopes you’ll go back to sleep.

Kinda like wanting to jump back into a dream, but it rarely ever happens unless you’re sleepy enough for it. In 1 out of maybe 10 scenarios you actually are sleepy enough, same goes for this instance.

I feel Jungkook move his arm, the tips of his fingers tucking a piece of hair behind my ear. His fingers fall to my shoulder trailing down before settling his whole hand on my upper arm.

It’s a Sunday, which usually consists of doing groceries and cleaning up the mess at home. So, if I can stretch this afternoon out as long as possible, I will.

I can already predict what awaits me at home; Beer bottles on the floor surrounding the couch, dirty dishes piling up in the sink, a load of dirty underwear and towels peeking out of the laundry basket, and probably a foul smell coming from somewhere you’re unable to locate.

Lost in thought, I eventually get sick of staying in the same position. I open my eyes with a soft groan, seeing there’s a blanket placed over us. That must mean Mingyu has seen us cuddled up on the couch, as he was probably getting his breakfast.

I slowly move my chin up to see Jungkook with his eyes closed, head slightly faltered to the side. My movement doesn’t give him any reaction, which must mean he’s fallen back asleep.

I untangle myself from his grip, careful not to wake him as I tuck him in with the blanket that was once lying over me, repeating Mingyu’s past actions of the day.

My clothes from the night before are still on his bedroom floor, crumpled up into a pile. I debate for a second if I should hop in the shower or not but I just know that if I don’t I’ll feel disgusting for the rest of the day.

Using Jungkook’s shampoo and body wash I now must smell just like him. He’s a sucker for good skincare so -with the little time I have for myself- I use his to wash my face and moisturize it.

Usually, I dry my hair with a hair dryer, it’s the best for the length of my hair. Letting it air dry takes hours and a hair dryer leaves an overall nicer finish. But since Jungkook is still sleeping, I pat my hair down with a towel and leave it at that. Too afraid that the noise will eventually wake him up.

Freshly out of the shower, dressed, moisturized skin, I’m now growing hungry. It’s a nice thank you to Jungkook if I’ll make him breakfast right? I know he likes anything containing literal flour, so that should be an easy task.

Compared to the fridge at home, this one is filled with food and ingredients. Milk and eggs in the refrigerator, flour found somewhere in one of his cabinets I decide to make him pancakes.

It checks off everything from the list; easy, tasty, great breakfast, contains flour. And I really don’t want to sound cocky, but over the years I’ve become a quite good cook. It was either, learning how to cook or living off of plain shin ramyun every single day. It’s the only ramen Yoongi would want to spend his money on, says it’s ‘without a doubt tasty, so it isn’t a waste of money’.

Unfortunately, I don’t know how to make them delicious, Japanese pancakes, like the lovely lady from the cafe does. But I do know how to make delicious crepes. Plus, they don’t require much effort.

Not even the smell of the crepes baking in the pan is enough to wake Jungkook again, which must mean he’s very tired. With his crepe now done baking, I top it with some sugar and lemon juice and place it on the counter.

Mine is now spread out on the pan, waiting to be flipped over. I walk over to the couch, placing a hand on Jungkook’s abs to shake him awake.

“Kook” a loud groan sounds from his throat, eyes sleepy trying to open them fully. “Smells good,” he says closing his eyes again and dropping the back of his head on the armrest ready to fall back to asleep.

“Yours is done already, come on,” that’s enough to get him up apparently, as before I know it he’s in the kitchen in front of his plate.

"What you wanna do today?" he asks me as he takes a bite off of his fork, humming in approval. I flip my crepe in the pan waiting for it to be done. "I need to do groceries and then clean up the apartment," I explain. he gives me a questioning look wondering why I'm the one who cleans at home.

"doesn't Yoongi do anything in the household?" I sprinkle some sugar on my crepe adding a bit of lemon juice before sitting down next to Jungkook. "Well, on rare occasions I guess,"

Jungkook disapproves, tells me that I need to protest by not cleaning anything. As if I havent thought of that. There was this one time I figured it wasn't fair for me to do all the housecleaning, which led to a huge fight between me and Yoongi. He told me he brought in the majority of the money within the household therefore it's only fair for me to do the shopping, cleaning, and cooking. even though I work as well. not as much as him since I still have school, but still I bring money into the household. more than mother ever would

"I'll help you" he then offers. Is he insane? nope, nu-uh. I tell him he's not coming home with me, to which he whines. and we eventually agree on just doing groceries together. Jungkook just has to get changed real quick and we’ll be off.

he changes into a simple white tee and blue baggy jeans, basic but stylish. he grabs his car keys and we make our way to the vehicle.

He drives us to a nearby store, one that I’ve never been to before. I don’t know what’s in the fridge at home if there’s anything really. But over the years I’ve picked up a kind of routine, buying almost the same kinds of things every single time.

Some kind of fruit, a family pack of ramen, eggs, milk, spring onions, a snack, and 2 packs of coke. It reaches just about our weekly budget and feeds us more than enough.

We walk inside of the store, trying to navigate anything that’s in my list. But the prices aren’t the ones that I’m used to, this store is far too overpriced.

I thug at his shirt, lowering my voice so none of the employees will hear me when I tell him I can’t afford it here.

“Uhm, Kook. This is far too expensive,” he looks at me as if I’m crazy, checking the prices for himself. “Where do you go then?”

I tell him it’s better to go to mine and drag him out of the store by his arm, buying nothing.

The one on my side of the city is a family-held business, I know the owners really well. The mother of the business used to be classmates with my mother, she’s always been nice enough to occasionally check up on me.

The products are far cheaper than whatever Jungkook’s store was, pointing out to him how much cheaper it actually is.

I send him off to grab me a pack of shin ramyun as I pick out some fruit, settling for a honeydew melon cause it’s probably one of my favourite fruits.

Gathering everything else and making our way to the cash register, I get greeted by the mother. She asks me how I’m doing and if my mom is okay.

I don’t want to bother her with the details by telling her she’s drunk at home so I just tell her she’s fine and been working hard, even though she doesn’t even have a job at this point.

She’s even so nice to pack the groceries up for me handing me a plastic bag whilst giving me a free bag of crisps.

However, after paying, Jungkook is still caught up in looking at the vitrine behind the counter. “One pack of cigarettes and a lighter please,” he says to her.

I’m certainly taken aback, I didn’t know he smoked. I mean I’ve seen him smoke before at parties but only rarely, never have I seen him buy a pack for himself.

I wait for us to be outside again before asking him about it, waving my mom’s friend goodbye. I load the bag of groceries onto the back seat of his car and want to sit back in the passenger seat but Jungkook just stands in front of the store.

I see him take a cigarette out of the packaging lighting it up between his lips. I stand next to him looking. At the big road that lays behind the parking lot.

“Since when do you smoke?” He raises an eyebrow at me.

“Today apparently,” he answers.

Unsatisfied with his decision, this just only asks for a new addiction. So to protest I hold out my hand, non-verbally asking him for a cigarette myself.

I hear him chuckle and he shakes his head. “No way Nayun,” he says with a big grin on his face. I try to force my hand in his pocket to just grab it but he’s stronger than me and pulls me away, telling me off.

With a big pout on my face, I decide this is unfair storming back into the store and getting another pair; a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. Do I have the money for it? Not really but sure, I’ll survive, financially that is.

So now I’m standing next to him, smoking my own cigarette.

“Yun, you shouldn’t smoke,” he tries to discuss.

“Neither should you,” I look at him blowing the stupid cigarette smoke out of his lungs, it looks damn hot I’m afraid to admit.

“You look stupid,” I tell him, even though he doesn’t. Cigarettes taste like shit, I should invest in one of them stupid-looking disco vapes.

He just chuckles at my remark and stays silent until we’ve both completely smoked up the cigarette.

“C'mon, I should really get home,” I nudge at him back to the car. The drive is literally 3 minutes, I usually walk this route.

I thank him for driving me but as I slam the door shut, the car turns off and Jungkook gets out too.

“What are you doing?” I ask him with a nervous chuckle. “Helping you out?”

I told him off on helping me to clean up already but he seemed determined, though he could also just mean walking me to my door. That’s just stupid, he always just dropped me off at a bus stop so why would he walk me all the way to my door now? You can see my door from the car so it’s just stupid to do that.

“What do you mean helping me out?..” I frown at him in confusion.

“Yun I don’t care what you say, I’m helping you clean,” he says as he walks towards the stairwell. I try my best to stop him, yelling after him in protest whilst running behind him like an idiot.

Though he really stands his ground, doesn’t let my protests stop him from getting to my house. The first time he’s here, in our long seven or eight-year friendship. I decide to just give in, cause I can’t just stand outside all day.

As I open the front door, the first thing you’ll see is the bathroom door. It’s not big enough to conceal the sight of the living room next to it. You can see everything as soon as you open it; living room in front, kitchen to your left, bedroom door wide open.

Mom still hasn’t come back, as for Yoongi I wouldn’t know. Yoongi usually leaves early in the mornings and comes back home late in the evening or night, I’ve learned to stop worrying about it. most of the time he spends it with his friends, Seokjin and Namjoon, sometimes even Hoseok, doing god knows what.

Having my house on display like this is vulnerable there are absolutely no filters you can put on it. No fake smiles, no ‘it’s fine’, there are no excuses when it’s like this.

And it’s truly shocking how bad it can get in a week’s worth. The couch is empty aside from the empty take-out box, Dad’s blanket, and some beer cans.

I look at Jungkook trying to see what his reaction is, but it’s fairly normal. I can see the slightest bit of shock on his face, his forehead creased a little. But it’s quick to soften up as he notices me swinging my head around, acting as if it’s the most normal case in the world.

“Welcome home I guess,” I say nervously.

He doesn’t say anything and takes his shoes off after me following right behind me into my house. I set the bag of groceries down on the kitchen counter, unpacking it and crumbling the plastic bag to go into a bigger plastic bag that’s stored in one of our cabinets.

“Are there supposed to be shards of glass on the ground?” I look back at him to see he’s standing by the window, next to the couch where a bottle had smashed during a fight between Yoongi and Mom.

“Oh yeah no I haven’t had time to clean it yet,” I explain.

It leaves him with a bunch of questions; what happened? Why is there a smashed bottle on the ground? Did you hurt anyone? Did you get hurt? But he just leaves it be and doesn’t question it any further.

“What can I do?” He asks me. I wouldn’t want to bother him with a hard task, because he’s a guest and of course he doesn’t know where anything is here.

I look around the room to see what he can do, spotting the beer crate in the corner of the kitchen and the bottles gathered around the couch and coffee table. I think it’s the perfect job for him to do just that, not too difficult for a guest and it’ll keep him busy for a little to stop complaining.

I hand him the crate and tell him to put the bottles In there as I focus on doing the dishes.

I tell him to look good for any lost bottles until the crate is completely filled up with them and to then put them out in the hall.

Luckily there aren’t many dishes, mainly bowls and chopsticks stacked up in the sink. So when Jungkook has put the crate outside I’m already done with washing all of them.

Now there are two things left to do; taking out the garbage and doing the laundry. None of these tasks seem appropriate for Jungkook to do, I don’t want to bother him and he doesn’t want me to be bothered by doing these tasks on my own.

He pushes me onto doing the laundry, he’s gonna take care of the garbage. The laundry room is opposite the bathroom right next to my bedroom, completely closed off from the kitchen.

It takes me some time as I put some clothes in the dryer the other day and hadn’t had the time to fold them yet, so that’s included in today’s task. Taking the dirty laundry baskets out of the bathroom, my room, and Yoongi’s and turning on the washer to do a quick dark wash.

Would’ve been embarrassing to let Jungkook fold the laundry, worse, load the washer. There’s lingerie in here that I wouldn’t want him to see, no matter the fact that he’s seen parts of me that even my best girlfriends haven’t.

Since it’s only clothing of Yoongi and I, only rarely ever mom’s clothing. It doesn’t take me an awful long time to fold everything separating the clothes into two piles, one for Yoongi and one for me. Putting both of them on our beds.

The doorbell then rings, I’m not expecting anyone. Mom doesn’t ring the doorbell, neither does Yoongi. Jungkook is quick to open the door before I’m able to reach the living room, I immediately notice how neat it is. It doesn’t surprise me completely, Jungkook’s apartment is always spotless and super tidy. I have no idea how he was able to do it here in the little amount of time that I was gone.

Not a single piece of rubbish that’s lying around or a bad odour lingering somewhere, not even a speck of dust that’s able to be found at the moment.

Jungkook doesn’t take long at the door, greets the person on the other side, and receives a package from them. None of us ever order anything so it must be the wrong address, though Jungkook seems sure of it and places the box on the coffee table.

“Dinner!” He chimes, utensils already set on the coffee table.

He ordered a large box of fried chicken, one of those luxurious ones where they dress it up all nicely and stuff. I don’t think I can remember the last time we had takeout, probably at Jia’s house or something. Certainly not with my family, Yoongi will always say it’s too expensive.

“Are you insane?!” I yell at him. He’s being far too generous, cleaning up for me and ordering me dinner?

There are certainly four different flavours, sweet and spicy, extra crispy, honey butter, and soy garlic. I don’t know if we’ll be able to finish all of it.

I turn on the TV to watch something, nothing that’s on cable really catches my attention. And neither does Jungkook so I pout at him begging him a little to log into his Netflix account, it receives a little chuckle from him as he takes the remote out of my hand logging into the account.

He lets me choose whatever I want, and suddenly in the mood to rewatch Alice in Borderland. And even though he has seen it already, he attentively watches the show with his cheeks full of chicken.

We make it about 1/3 through the box before I’m already full, Jungkook’s appetite lays a little higher than mine, and continues eating a bit more than me but it doesn’t take him long to sigh at the fullness of his stomach as well.

I take a sip of my soda and hear the front door open, both Yoongi and Mom walking inside. She doesn’t look good, eye bags that are darker than my hair, hair all messy I swear there’s leaves in them. Yoongi looks tired too, in a different way than Mom though. Yoongi just looks sleepy as for Mom she looks sleep-deprived and lifeless.

Jungkook stands up from the ground immediately, bowing to greet my mother and Yoongi politely. He has never actually met my mother, he’s heard about her a hundred thousand times but never actually met her.

She tries her best to cheer up at the sight of jungkook, telling him how glad she is to finally meet him and how handsome he is. She quite literally squeezes his bicep and praises him for how strong he is. Shes acting like a fool, as if she’s a teenager again. It also doesn’t help that she doesn’t stop drinking, even if she’s already drunk.

Yoongi and Mom settle around the coffee table nibbling away on the chicken whilst Mom asks Jungkook a bunch of questions, asking about his parents and how he grew up and whatnot. Yoongi and I just stay silent, heads down.

It makes me sad seeing how much effort she’s putting into getting to know Jungkook, she never cares to ask anything about us. Whenever we leave the house for days, she doesn’t care. Whenever someone comes back injured or crying, she doesn’t bat an eye.

It just hurts knowing you’re the problem. Whenever she acts careless I’ll just brush it off as something she does, but seeing her act like this just puts a stamp on us being the problem.

It takes her a whole one-hour conversation to doze off, Yoongi drags her to the couch lying her down on it and she’s out like a light.

It’s nearly 9 pm now so Jungkook thinks it’s better to be off. Yoongi thanks him for the food and apologises for our mother’s behaviour, leaving me to walk Jungkook back to his car.

“Thank you so much for helping me out today, it means a lot,” I say as we’re standing beside his car.

“It’s no problem, it was nice to meet your mom. And of course, see where you live for once,” he adds.

“I guess I was always a little embarrassed about it but… I know I can trust you,”

He takes a step closer to me tugging me into a warm embrace.

“No need to be embarrassed about anything okay?” He says. I nod against his cheesy hugging his waist tightly saying our goodbyes.

I can’t hug him too long in case Yoongi might see and suspect things that aren’t there. He seems to be in a calm mood, I wouldn’t want to blow that up right now.

And then Jungkook drives off. It’s awfully quiet out, it’s almost dark leaving the air in an awkward grey color.

I release a big sigh before making my way back up to the apartment, where Yoongi is cleaning up the mess that was left behind at our dinner party.

“Where’d you find her?” I ask him, referencing him coming home with Mom.

“Found her on a bench somewhere near the city,” he explains. There’s no emotion behind it, the same goes for me. It doesn’t sound sad, angry, annoyed, happy or cold. Just, normal.

“I’m really sorry about what happened,” his voice changes, it sounds genuine and apologetic.

“I shouldn’t have said any of that,” he holds his head down whilst I’m trying to stay neutral before I break down in tears again.

But Yoongi doesn’t really go in on it any further, doesn’t talk about Dad or repeat anything that he shouted at me in the convenience store.

Instead, he tells me to wait as he disappears into his room, coming out with a rectangular box that’s wrapped in pink paper with a little bow in it.

“Here, I got you something,” he held it out for me to accept.

I take the package in hand unwrapping it eagerly, revealing the corner of a white box, and until it’s fully unwrapped I see he’s gifted me an iPhone. An iPhone 14 Pro Max to be exact.

I stutter in response, “What? Are you serious?”

A big grin appears on his face, proud of having such a reaction to his gift.

“This is far too expensive, are you crazy!?” I exclaim.

“I saved up, you deserved it. I smashed the other one anyways,” he acts nonchalant as if it’s nothing. I hug him tightly, still in complete unbelief.

“Thank you Yoongi,” I say as he gives me a small tight tight-lipped smile, he tells me to be careful with it and most of all enjoy it before he’s about to disappear into his room.

I remember seeing Dad yesterday and I should probably talk to him about it, it’s his dad too after all.

“Wait Yoongi,” I hesitate.

He turns around on his feet eyebrows raised a little, intently listening to whatever I have to say.

“I ran into Dad yesterday…” I can see his face drop instantly bombarding me with questions.

He’s worried, I can tell that whatever he said yesterday fades away just like that. He’s a softie deep inside.

I explained to him that I saw him in the elevator and that Jungkook saved me just in time, switching up the names cause I wouldn’t want to cause any more trouble.

“It hurts me too… I know you hate him and that you’re hurt, but I’m the person who had to live through all of it,” I sob softly.

He shushes me pulling me into a long hug, keeping me safe from anything and everything. “Be careful next time you go to Jungkook’s apartment okay, you don’t know what he’s capable of,”

“And call me if you see him, I promise I won’t lash out on you anymore,”

My tears are coming to a stop, leaving out water less and less. He asks me if he can do anything for me which I decline and then he really disappears into his room, wishing me a good night.

I feel so relieved. Things with Yoongi are good, Jungkook isn't embarrassed by me I think and I have a new freaking phone. It was time for an upgrade to be fair.

But I’ll set that up tomorrow, I’ll just watch a show and go to sleep cause I think I deserve some rest after everything that has been happening.

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