#BUT IM LEAVING IT THERE BC. SHY.
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Mello and Misa on a one mofu open sleigh, the bimbo sleigh if you will
#yaaalllll the exhibit was so dope i left feeling like i was walking on a cloud and missed the train to yoLohama#no but really. so so cool#you could literally see the pen/brush/marker strokes! it was so much fun to spot all the little corrections! i think they changed misa's#side profile a little?? and for mello it was mostly just his lips#near had his whole existence remixed basically wbk but i personally didn't know the extent of it like they didn't even leave his hair alone#on those drawings there was more correction fluid than ink or marker#light looked sliiiightly different at the beginning (or is it just me?) and not in the schoolboy to kira way#it was something subtle about his features. L was the best drawn character like. for a mf whos supposed to be unattractive those lines +#shadows were consistently sublime#but then again all the art was. there was this one panel in which light looked like he might've had braces but I'm sure it was just an#optical illusion bc once again of the corrections#overall so much fun idk what i was so scared of the other fans there were just as excited and some even shy and nervous as me#we couldn't find the right elevator lmaooo#most of the girlies there were slaying like. *Slaying* im so glad i dressed up a tad!#only 'downside' is i feel like some merch items were missing like im not sure but. there wasn't that much. besides the plushies i only got a#misa sticker and the m2 & remisa acrylic glass panels thingies#at the ticket counter they had a map for international fans to put a dot on their country which was kinda cute♡#there werent many dots around the world maybe just like 20?is that even possible? but the southern Mediterranean gang has a dot too now hehe#oh and i got a free Light card..... like. i don't wanna see it💀💀💀#death note#death note shitpost#misa amane#mihael keehl#mello death note#dn#now that i look at them again they're kinda giving hunger games tributes on the chariot hfsgjzgk
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Simply just curious! (and when i say old art, say like... 3-5+ years old)
#i usually leave old art up bc im big on archiving#and i think it's kind of neat when u leave old art up u can see how u improved over the years as well#and it can also serve as a point of motivation as well when ppl see other artists also evolving over the yrs!!#but i wont lie sometimes i get a lil shy and prune some old stuff LMFAO
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fucking Help Him
#pepstavo#spicy hot#but like ONLY for the text#keeping it out of the bigger main tags bc im shy sdfkhsfshdfksdj#apologies for it being so text heavy....#and apologies but i have so much happening now#flight coming up#multiple comms i had to put on hold for Reasons#bday coming up#so um. this is what im leaving with you#see yall in like two weeks maybe; ill keep the queue up and running#and possibly add my own art to it#but i wont have any time to indulge in ANYTHING art related aside from comms :(#i wanted to draw pie----poe interactions and i cant even do THAT i hate it here
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nervous to share this bc i don't know the jwcc fandom's feelings on ocs but um. yeah im incapable of keeping my insanity to myself so this is robin
they meet the camp fam on the first visit to main street, making a dramatic entrance by beating off rexy with a big stick and yelling a lot :-) (probably idk. subject to change)
she's a junior motorsports racer, at Jurassic World to test/display the gyrospheres for racing (untapped potential, guys) but gets caught in a dino stampede upon escape/shutdown so she misses the evac.
big music girlie also but she's reserved abt it for reasons that would make this post too long. oh yeah they're half italian also. hence the. italian
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have a lot more to figure out about her but ough. the brain. wworms.. .
#seven is a crowd au#hyping myself up to post this instead of leaving it to rot in my drafts bc whose permission am i waiting for???#jwcc oc#jwcc#camp cretaceous#my art#oc intro post#jwcc robin#robin marchetti#surprisingly for me her name doesnt ave any deep meaning#i was just like hey baby sites whas smth vaguely gn. no3 robin? epic les go. andd smth italian#AAA OK IM POSTING#why am i so shy abt this im usually xtra chill bt oc posting 😭😭
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lifes so hard when ur a guy who loves singing w their whole chest but you have pretty much nowhere to do so
#shut up dave#'rama theres karaoke bars if u cant find just isolated areas' im SHY#and what karaoke things gonna have i miss the mountains from next to normal.#leave me alone#its sooo rare to not have anyone home bc i live w like 6 ppl#hello rama fans... do u remember my concerts... do u miss them...
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THE CLOVERS
Finally making a post to lore dump about my silly little fed ocs lets gooo
The nickname for this unoffical squad of three in the Federal Army of Chorus, “the Clovers” comes from a joke about the three of them being not-quite-lucky, due to a combination of both really good and really bad luck (think along the lines of…. You trip and fell down a flight of stairs, but because you tripped, you weren’t in the blastzone of a grenade- that kind of bullshit). Their unusual luck lead to a joke about how three leaf clovers aren’t generally considered lucky, and since its hard to call their particular brand of luck “good”, it stuck.
Despite their peculiar luck, the Clovers must be somewhat decent soldiers, as they’ve worked with Locus on several occasions. Or he’s just good enough to not be hindered by their luck. It’s hard to say.
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Necoda “Neko” Micce : he/they - standard infantry/scout - the ‘Black Cat’ of the Clovers - Neko has a bit of a reputation for being a troublemaker and a bit of an enigma. He rarely gives a straight answer to personal questions, and often blatantly lies if asked directly about his past. They tell the truth regarding missions, at least, but the inability to take themselves seriously for longer than 10 seconds makes Neko quite the pain in the ass to most of the FAC’s officers. Fast, clever and unusually flexible, Neko’s got a slight problem with sticky fingers and a mischievous streak that makes them few friends within the army— but to the few friends they do have, Neko is intensely loyal.
Anton Pavoz : he/him - standard infantry/heavy weapon specialist (eventually) - the ‘Ladybug’ of the Clovers - Anton comes from a military family on both his mother and his father’s side, so joining the Federal Army of Chorus was an easy decision for him to make as soon as he was able to— even if his mother was one of the military rank officials who fled Chorus when the civil war started to take a turn for the worse. Anton’s stubborn nature and the sheer fact that he has never known another home other than Chorus led to him staying behind to fight. A romantic at heart, Anton wants to assume the best intentions and the best of people when he can, although the current state of Chorus makes it… difficult.
Ivia Soares : she/her - medic - the ‘Rabbit’ of the Clovers - Raised by her single survivalist father, Ivia grew up on camping trips out into the wilds of Chorus, learning how to take care of herself in the ‘inevitable fall of society’. While she never quite bought the mentality behind it, the camping trips instilled a love for the untamed parts of Chorus that lead to Ivia’s fascination and desire to learn more about the wildlife of her home. She had started university to hone that love into skill with degrees in veterinary sciences, xenobiology and zoology when her father’s death as a civilian causality in one of the New Republic’s “protests” turned her sights towards the Federal Army of Chorus instead. She still maintains her fluency in Portuguese, her father’s native language, as a way of keeping him close.
Bonus: rough heights, another version of their faces and a doodle page
#whats this? oc lore post? yippee!#my art#batsy art#rvb oc#rvb oc: the clovers#necoda ‘neko’ micce#anton pavoz#ivia soares#theyre my blorbos ur honor#spinning them in my head 24/7#i have…so much of them i wanna rattle off about but im like NO gotta save some of it for posting with art#like i COULD elaborate on why locus has worked with them bc i Know the reasoning#or i could leave it mysterious for now and do art for pre redsnwash clovers and locus#so like#>:3c#ive got canon blorbo art i wanna finish first BUT im like… ive had these pieces of them done for a hot minute i just kept getting shy#but my brain isnt awake enough to hesitate now so BOOM#oc be upon thee and all that
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hey. fierce deity but it’s a jekyll and hyde situation. fierce’s personality takes on whatever traits that Time tries to bury and ignore. however violent or benevolent he acts depends entirely on what Time is suppressing.
#either like. time is secretly very unsatisfied and bitter and is barely not lashing out#so fierce is constantly bitter and lashing out#or time is suppressing his emotions bc he’s afraid of attachment#so fierce is incredibly paternal and comforting#u can go either way (or both at the same time which would be very very interesting. time’s not showing his anger at how his family has been-#- treated and is horrified of the prospect of having found family in people he Knows he will have to leave at some point)#imagine warriors figuring this out and having to come to terms w the fact that the ferocious and oddly caring war deity was taking on the-#- personality of the sweet but shy and closed off 10 yr old he had come to care for#what a wild ride that would be#pspspspsps angst writers. cmere.#i might write this but i’d love to see what others can do w this idea#time lu#lu time#linked universe#linkeduniverse#fierce deity lu#lu fierce deity#lu#ft my interpretation of jekyll and hyde#i think this is the common understanding of it. i don’t know i just listened to my dad rant abt it two years ago and think ik what im on abt
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✨
#aaugh putting this in tags because im shy but. little reminder that i will answer asks/questions about what the hell im on about in my#isat drawings and the rambles i leave in the tags. i am however like a vampire in that i must be invited to do so first#this ALSO counts for Nohats. Theres a bunch of nohats stuff that hasnt been posted abt bc sam and i have no idea how to execute on it but#yeah im not. used to being in active fanbases so i feel rude just yellin about AUs and headcanons!!! augh!!! but i want to make it#very clear that i very expressly make fanworks with the intent that other people can chew on them and build upon them. so. if i look like#i have more info or thoughts and youd want them. youll probably have to ask since just putting it out there feels presumptive to meee yowch#ill also just answer asks in general . the only reason i dont appear talkative is bc i dont wanna look presumptive and rude LOL#lucabytetalks
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// nsfw
Childe riding Scara's strap with his hands tied behind his back while Scara looks completely unbothered listening to his lover's whimpers and desperate moans while reading a book. Childe is overstimulated and his hips are aching from all the grinding; he hasn't been touched by the other since the start and seeing him so bored even when he's being slowly tortured like that is so frustrating. He wants to be touched and have his little performance appreciated by Scara so he starts begging, crying and saying he can't cum anymore and shamelessly begging some more until Scara snaps from all that unnecessary noisy and throws his book to the side to turn Childe around, burying his face in the mattress and fucks him until he finally shuts up <3
#scara doesn't take care of childe after just bc he was that annoying and just leaves him there the whole night#not even untying him#but childe is too tired to even ask for it#i never wrote anything this specific bc im shy but this scenario hasnt left my head so#oh god im so embarrassed#chiscara#mine
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i think itis funny in the past when i would list my interests as if i post abt them i donot post abt the shit im into rly Mainly bc im not rly Into Into anything anymore i occasionally watch or read or play something but i dont do fandom stuff rly much.... just sometimes i get brainworms
#do i still list my interests somewhere i dont knowwww#i just stopped rly being into fandom a few years ago combination depression antipathy + bad experiences in fandom spaces#but idk. me listing my interests didnt rly accomplish anything for anyone bc it was just like anddd just so you know i was crazy abt this#video game for a rly long time it probably wont ever come up again but it might maybe one day. yk. ig its just sharing info Which is one#supposes the point of all of this but idk#its not that im cagey abt my interests except that one which i cant talk abt publically bc its a triple a game and im embarassed abt it. no#anything bad im just embarrassed . its not anything any of my oomfies have ever posted abt either so its just for me. and lamp . and when#the third game comes out i might post very very very vaguely abt it ......... possibly.#but ya its like. idk i think you guys have to find out abt my plague tale obsession on your own through lived experience. aka just me seein#like the word king and randomly collapsing to the floor and going KING HUGO 😭😭😭😭😭 oh god hugo guys oh god . please play plague tale#i wish i had finished that tw thing i started making but then i got too focused on the color palette and making it look nice and i stopped.#umm tw child death animal death The plague some gorey stuff theres some cult things in the second game ummm. yeah ..... its rly special to#me tho i love those games PLAY PLAGUE TALE!!! and if u need more indepth tws ill give them to you even if i have to replay both games to#refresh my memory... lamp wont play plaguetale with me (not their speed) so im all alone </3 but i miss it i might replay soon... i wish i#was in like discord servers so i could play it on call w ppl or something <- is in discord servers but is shy and Also i feel like playing#game on call is like a level like 2 friendship thing and i cant even do level 1 friendship things like i feel i need to at least be talking#regularly in a server b4 i like try to do Calls in the server esp for plague tale bc its like a 1p game so wed need a rapport to like have#shit to talk abt and etc ..... i could just infodump abt the game but again i feel doing that to like strangers/oomfies would b weird. ik i#come on here and talk abt whatever i want but its like you guys dont Have to read this and its not like a server where Yeah im not talking#to one person but im still like Oh well ive sent a message and its in the channel and everybody just has to look at it and whatever.#but on here i post i nobody cares and it just gets pushed down and its Fine bc its not like anybody has to feel obliged to respond#which is fine. you know.. i just hate being like a nuisance i hate . idk how to phrase. imposing myself on others ig.. which is dumb bc the#i turn around and whine abt how i have no friends and its like Maybe that is bc you donot talk to anyone bc yr scared they will be annoyed#with you and you dont leave the house and have no interests to bond with ppl and etc. but basically the difference is ive written all this#and you guys can just not read it or you can just read it and ignore it and its different. even tho i am like addressing you and i do have#like. weird parasocial thing with My followers or whatever where i talk directly to you YES YOU! reading this. IDKK im rambling so much i#dont know what im talking abt anymore. i proooooobably need to go to sleep im hungry tho but im not but i am. but i think my sleep is getti#off schedule again i had trouble sleeping yesterday too... ugh
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nobody:
me: im just gonna make a dungeon meshi self insert, it's gonna be fun ! i'd definitely be a halfling... cute clothes too... and i.... *looks at holm for a little too long* ah, FUCK IT *draws my very real gnome boyfriend next to me*
#d-d-do you think he would mind our lifespans are completely fucked#i saw that funny page ryoko kui drew about long lived races being disgusted at those who date shortlived races bcs of the age gap#and i think its very funny to.... think... about.... <- totally hasnt been daydreaming inserting myself in the post canon story to date hol#LEAVE ME ALOOOOONNNEEEE#he is so sillu and goofy and cute my little gnome.... I NEED TO BITE HIM CHEW ON HIM HE IS SOOOOO#dies#“the clothes are confusing are they in canon or modern era”#i drew myself first so i was supposed to be in canon#but then i drew holm taking as a base the gnomes info page height chart (forgot to mention) but thrn i gave him modern looking clothes.....#IDK OKAY#tbf i've clothes similar to the ones of my self insert so really we're both wearing modern stuff- im weird but that's just my fashion style#<- trully dresses like the english teacher they are#ANYWAYS#my art#vanya strawberry flavored#im shy so reblogs are disabled lol
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thinking about the fact that i was so socially awkward as a teen that the school wanted to me out of class to attend "social skills classes" once a week (to which i attended one and demanded i be removed from the program cuz it was just me and about a dozen equally uncomfortable probably-autistic kids who also probably did not want to be there, being forced to do icebreaker activities by deeply condescending special education teachers)
how did i not receive an autism diagnosis til i was nearly an adult and specifically advocated for myself to be taken to a professional to get checked out for autism and adhd???
#eliot posts#i'm really curious whose call it was to put me in there#it wasn't my parents because my mother was Outraged that her kid got put in a special ed type class and signed the papers so i could leave#so like. what teacher made that call.#and what exactly sparked that#was it my general being a loner or was there An Incident#i don't remember exactly what grade i was in. probably 8th or 9th?#so still kind of stuck in my ''convinced myself i was just Better than my peers and that's why i didn't have many friends'' phase#following that was a phase where i got over myself but was kinda just shy#and then a phase where i went okay fuck it we ball and acted weird but in a way intended to be funny#that annoyed some people but some people enjoyed. by then i figured ''eh i aint seeing most of these ppl ever again after graduation''#i had some friends in high school bc of marching band but they were all in different grades than me#tho even then i was only close w like 2 of them and the rest all seemed closer to each other than to me#edit: dug through my blog and it was 7th grade (yeah ive been on here that long)#so this was before i even had my marching band friends. but probably after my singular friend from elementary school moved away?#i forget if he left in 6th or 7th grade#(im still friends with that friend. he's great we love him)
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Maybe I’m delusional or maybe my freshman and sophomore year history teacher is the only person who has ever understood me
#thinking about how I saw in the back corner of her classroom freshman year bc I was shy and she would go out of her way to stand in that#corner and talk to me and ask me about the books I was reading#how she would leave thoughtful notes on my work sometimes even complimenting me about it in person#and during class presentations I would freeze up and panic and choke on my words#and then she’d go it’s okay take you’re time you’re doing great#and then tell me afterwards that she liked my presentation#sophomore year I was confident enough in her class to sit in the very front row#and she would look at me while lecturing and make jokes specifically towards me#and before the ap exam I was standing around after school hours#and she asked me if I had a ride home and offered to wait with me#and she asked how I was feeling about the exam and I was feeling really nervous and not confident at all#and she fully talked me down and convinced me that I could do it and said she believed in me#on the last day I had her class she said quote:#it’s been wonderful watching you blossom the two years I’ve had you I think you’ve really found who you are and you’re owning it and im so#proud of you#and she hugged me#I miss her so much#school fucking sucks without her her class was the highlight of my day#literally just seeing her is the highlight of my day now#she waved to me in the hallway today and I haven’t stopped thinking about it#im gonna cry. I miss her so bad
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ill be skinny. it will happen. ive been trying for so long now. once it was just trying to eat less and be smaller but not much real focus on my physical appearance. now its all about that. 11 years of my ed and 7 years of wanting what i want now. i dont live with my parents anymore. i have more control. i will achieve it.
there was a time where id eat 300-700 consistently. ill get that back. i will.
#most of the years ive had an ed i had no access to a scale so it was very jard to track progress#maybe i did lie my ass off and fool ppl around me into thinking its actually healthier for me to have a scale bc ill restrict worse without#one which is half true. not that kts anyones right to make that choice at this point. at least not in 2 months when im 18 its not#part of the problem im having is i wanna be small but i have so little muscle that ill have to be very dangerously underweight to look even#close to how i want. many peoples ugws are under that line. mine was once. before i learned that its genuinely very very dangerous#and a lot of the people who look the way i wanna look are only just below that line which is where id like to be#they look that way bc they have more muscle. most ppl cant maintain a bmi of 14 or less for that long. eventually your body freaks out#ppl use instances like eugenia coonie as proof that you can actually do it but like. most peoples bodies wont hold out that long#and many of the ppl in thinspo pics eother only maintained it for a short bit before gaining or getting really sick or they weighed more#and had more muscle. and like. my goal isnt to be all bone. i dont wanna push it that far. bony people arent physically nice to hold anyway#i just wanna be light enough that somwone cpuld carry me and people might view me in a certain way#i wanna be seen as cute and fragile and shy and like. young and sweet. ots hard to explain exactly what i want peopel see see me like but i#want when people look at pictures or videos of me for them to think i look sweet and wanna be gantle and nice to me#and when i walk around places instead of seeing an awkward weirdo they see a timid cute girl whos really tiny and pretty#i know ill never be that but. maybe if i lose enough weight and dont have much acne and leave my hair down then maybe i can come close
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how to fuck am i supposed to get over my crush when everytime i spend time w him and look at him i feel Weird and Fluttery
#today was a nice day#also unrelated but i forgot my umbrella in the rental car and now im rlly mad at myself 🤠🤠#i txted my friend abt it when i realized and she saw my txt too late bc i was too shy to call even tho i probs should have and ughhhhhh#now i probably have to pay the car rental service 25€ to get my umbrella back 🥲🥲 yipee (cries)#if the umbrella didn't have sentimental value to me i'd just leave it but i rlly like it + it was a gift from my mom + it's durable 😭#my posts
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#im asking bc im not sure if you guys would be interested in meeting me a bit more.#i was thinking about it since i just draw something; slap it here and run away. only come back to read silly tags you leave me with#kind of lurking here#you guys have to believe me i'm in fact very shy about posting my art here#i'd love to share some stories and drawings of my ocs tbh...
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