#BUT HEREEEEEE :3333

[ovidiomedes]

9. Person a gets hurt while on a solo mission/alone + naegami for @makowo

“I’ll be fine!”, he had said. “I don’t need any help! I can handle myself on my own!” He had insisted.

Naegi knew he could handle himself on his own. He wasn’t fucking useless. He had done it before and he’d be fucking damned if he couldn’t do it again, but now. Fucking hell.

He was sitting on the floor of an abandoned factory, clutching his stomach as it slowly bled. 

He knew that this is where he would find the remnant of despair, Kazuichi Souda. Kirigiri has informed him about the whereabouts of several of the remnants. Togami had refused to help. He understood why. Didn’t mean it hurt any less.

Naegi had to admit he still didn’t know very well what he was doing with the remnants. They had already managed to capture the former Ultimate Gymnast and the former Ultimate Photographer. They didn’t go easily, and now the current remnant of despair, Souda, was not making this easy.

Once Naegi had found his base of operations, where he supposedly spent most of his time building monokuma’s and weapons to be sent to Towa City, he thought it’d be easy enough to sneak in and knock him out whilst he wasn’t looking.

Naegi, however, had not accounted for the thousands upon thousands of Monokuma robots watching the every move of the factory. He should’ve known better. God fucking damnit.

Now, he was bleeding out on the floor with Souda probably still looking for him.

He could still move his left arm though. His right arm was being pressed against his abdomen, already soaked in blood and starting to hurt. He could still do something though. He had to.

He reached into his pocket and grabbed his phone. It was a cheap phone Hagakure had made for him. Well, made for all six of the survivors. It couldn’t be traced by the remnants or the foundation, and was supposed to act as an emergency contact if any of them were ever in trouble.

God fucking bless Hagakure.

His hands were still shaking as he clicked on Togami’s contact. He knew the other man was upset at him. He understood why, and yet all that Naegi wanted was to talk to him. 

He wriggled the phone between his shoulder and ear, letting it sit there as he needed to put his left arm back against his abdomen.

“You have some fucking balls to be calling through Hagakure’s stupid ass emergency phone”

And Naegi feels like he could burst into tears. He had never felt so relieved to hear Togami’s snarky sarcasm before in his entire life.

“Byakuya, I-”, he winces. A sharp pain in his stomach decides to make itself known. God is he going to survive? He survives a fucking killing game but getting stabbed in the gut by Kazuichi Souda is what takes him out.

“Makoto?”

He can practically hear the concern dripping from Togami’s words. If he wasn’t about to pass out from blood loss he’d tease Togami about it, and yet.

“Y-you were right! Though that’s not really surprising. You usually are. You’re very smart. I should listen to you more! Promise I will! If I uh- if”

Words are starting to become hard. He can feel his tongue become heavy in his mouth. He probably should’ve called Togami sooner, or someone. God he’s an idiot.

“Okay. I know where you are. The phone gave me your location. Don’t fucking move. I’m on my way.”

Naegi nods, almost laughing. Why would he nod if Togami can’t even see him? What’s wrong with him?

Togami says something else. It seems desperate, but Naegi can’t hear him as he’s already down under.

[pleaseeeimjustagirl]

🌷Summer Skincare Recommendations🌷

Hey babesss the summer is officially hereeeeee and I am so excited and I need to keep my girliesss skincare in check okay! So I will be listing my skincare favorites below that you can purchase on Amazon. Always consult your dermatologist and do your thorough research on these products to see if they will benefit your skin type. I will be rating everything out of 5 stars⭐️ <3333

Cleansers 

♡ ANUA Heartleaf Quercetinol Pore Deep Cleansing Foam

⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

♡ ANUA Heartleaf Pore Control Cleansing Oil ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

♡ Beauty of Joseon Green Plum Refreshing Cleanser Gel

⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

♡ ROUND LAB 1025 Dokdo Cleanser ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

♡ COSRX Low pH Good Morning Gel Cleanser ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

Toners 

♡ I'm from Rice Toner Milky Toner for Glowing Skin ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

♡ ANUA Heartleaf 77 Soothing Toner ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

♡ Beauty of Joseon Ginseng Essence Water Hydrating Face Toner ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

♡ ANUA Heartleaf 77 Toner Pad ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

♡ Beauty of Joseon Glow Replenishing Rice Facial Sebum Toner for Oily Combination Acne Skin ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

♡ COSRX AHA/BHA Clarifying Treatment Toner ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

Serums 

♡ Topicals Faded Brightening and Clearing Serum ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

♡ Beauty of Joseon Glow Serum Propolis and Niacinamide Hydrating Facial ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

♡ SKIN1004 Madagascar Centella Asiatica Ampoule Facial Serum ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

♡ Youth To The People 15% Vitamin C Face Serum ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

♡ Anua Peach 70 Niacinamide Serum ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

Moisturizers 

♡ Bio-Oil Skincare Body Oil, Serum for Scars and Stretchmarks, Face Moisturizer ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

♡ Beauty of Joseon Dynasty Cream Hydrating Face Moisturizer

⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

♡ Illiyoon Ceramide Ato Concentrate Cream Korean Moisturizer

⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

Eyecreams 

♡ Medicube Deep Reviving Peptide Eye Cream ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

♡ COSRX Retinol Cream, 0.67 Oz, Anti-aging Eye & Neck Cream with Retinoid ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

♡ Beauty of Joseon Revive Eye Serum with Retinal Niacinamide Correction ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

Sunscreen 

♡ ROUND LAB Birch Juice Moisturizing Sunscreen ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

♡ Neutrogena Clear Face Liquid Lotion Sunscreen ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

♡ La Roche-Posay Anthelios Light Fluid Facial Sunscreen ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

Face Masks 

♡ COSRX Snail Mucin Sheet Mask ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

♡ Collagen Lifting Mask ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

♡ Aztec Secret Indian Healing Clay Deep Pore Cleansing Facial & Body Mask ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

Skincare Tools

♡ BAIMEI Jade Roller & Gua Sha Set Face Roller and Gua Sha Facial Tools

♡ Colorfarm Facial Steamer Nano Ionic: Face Steamer Deep Cleaning Unclogs Pores - Humidifier

♡ Ice Roller for Face, Ice Face Roller & Eye Puffiness Relief

♡ 7 Colors Led Light Therapy Facial Mask, Face Light Therapy Mask for Face

♡ NuFACE MINI+ Microcurrent Facial Device Kit - FDA Cleared Face Sculpting & Skin Tightening Device

[shortnsweetgf]

AHHHHHH @its-tortle THEYRE HEREEEEEE <3333 and they fit perfectly!!!!!!!!!

(the card made me good cry i love you so much)

[slasheru]

Non-SU related: I uploaded one of my old casual games (a browser based 90's goth makeup sim!) to itch, inspired by y2k era doll dressup flash games! You can play it hereeeeee <3333

[zarchomp]

Thank you for the tag!!

I officially tag anyone wanting to jump on hereeeeee <3333

Challenging you all!

Put your music library on shuffle, then list the first five songs that come up in a poll to let people vote for which one they like the most!

Then tag Tumblr friends to keep the game going!

[soft4gguk]

miss maam are u still there

hereeeeee!!! <3333 xo iluuuu

[theinvisiblemuseum]

lilycissa?

answered this one hereeeeee <3333 they are my beloveds fr

[hhawkeye]

work just got the pink drink in and its a hot summer weekend and im working 23 hours fri-sun and im like <3333 im gonna die hereeeeee

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

I’M HEREEEEEE I’M HERE

you know i HAD to cook up a lil letter for this one…… dipping my pen in ink and tracing the crinkled paper in front of me rn <333 MICKEYYYYY YOUR TASTE IS UNPARALLELED AS ALWAYS i had to go hunt down my own collection immediately pls bare w me :’3 i’m so excited rn i’m shaking like a scared dog

FIRST OF ALLLLLLLL portrait of fryderyk in shifting light my absolute BELOVED i think that’s my favorite in the whole collection but there’s some competition…. THE LINES YOU MARKED DOWNNNNN I’M BARKING WILDLY they’re so good ………. what can you know about a person? they shift in the light. what if i cried and exploded and also threw up. it always makes me think sm of geto/kenny too…. the dichotomy there. the life of the body is a nightmare. you get the vibes. my hand over his face, which isn’t his face anymore, revising….

IT ISSSSS SUPER DUPER IHTCTAOT CODED!!!!!!! :3 reading through the poem rn and i think these lines are soooo knight!reader/prince!toru coded too…….

+ some other general siken poem lines that remind me of ihtctaot :3333 (the green+pink annotations are from his other collection crush!!)

(mickey i need to know if you also lost your mind at the and this means your life is over anyway line bc i was literally flipping through crush looking for knight!reader in every poem and when i got to that one i fucking Exploded)

ANDDDDD THE WORM KING’S LULLABY MY BELOVED EVER that one makes me think of stsg too 😥😥😥 IT’S SO GOODDDDD also while we’re on the topic of stsg . pls know that every single poem from crush is stsg coded . siken wrote it just for them i’m convinced….

aaaa but !!!! i’m so happy the ones i sent you way back then r still your favorites !!!!!! T_T getting a good grade in Mickey…….. normal to want and possible to achieve…… self-portrait against red wallpaper reminds me SO much of knight!reader and ohhhhh the lines you pointed out. the apocalypse au … that’s so good ….. i think that’s what interests me most about an au like that. not the question of survival but the question of what happens after, yk? or between the gaps. even if you survive, what will you do? can you go back to the way things were? will you be able to love anyone anymore? and then ofc also just . the question of love and light and how much it really matters in a world that punishes you for it (it matters more than anything but these silly little emotionally repressed popsicles haven’t realized that yet)…. i’m sososo excited to jump into that world w you <3333

but ok back to siken… it rlly is The Poem ever i’m never not thinking abt it. never not thinking abt my blorbos as i read it. the final couple lines get me EVERY time and imo they’re very gumi coded…… i hate my friends. and when i hate my friends i’ve failed myself, failed to share my compassion. (…) i mean, maybe it’s better if my opponent wins. <- that’s Him. don’t even get me started on i clawed my way into the light but the light is just as scary. (…) it’s too much work. bc in context of the current megumi? in the manga??? yeah. sick and twisted.

AND TOJI TOJIIIII WE NEEEDDDD TO TALK ABT TOJI i’m gonna be honest mickey war of the foxes as a whole reminds me of the jjk villains more than the good guys . sukuna and toji and geto and kenny. etcetc. emphasis on toji. the lines you picked out makes me think of him sosomuch but also??? landscape with a blur of conquerors. the whole poem. every time i read it i think of him

ALSO this specific part of a primer for the small weird loves …. in crush ……. instantly thought of him the first time i read it like three years ago (normal abt him btw)

ANYWAYYYYY I THINK THAT’S IT …… i’m so happy you enjoyed the collection <3333 atp my goal in life is just to make my mutuals read it …. i’ve alr succeeded w you and io + kairo bought it a while back i think …….. mr siken everything i do is for you

i am back from the Outside. back from the Book.

anyway portrait of fryderyk in shifting light is very very very ihtctaot coded and it's making me sick i love them so fucking much

"he is looking at the wall and i am looking at his looking. difficult thing to be scrutinized for so long." // "my shadow falls across him and it doesn't go away." // "see me, not through me." // there wasn't much left but it felt like him, wild and scared."

+ and this part from the worm king's lullaby made me think of stsg i'm fine btw i'm so fine

@twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat hihi my sweet little iris i am holding your hand and tugging you over here to tell you that remember when you showed me siken's poems like a million years ago? the ones you picked out are still my favourite ones.

self-portrait against red wallpaper is my favourite favourite from the whole collection though. i just wanna thank you for showing me this one in the first place, life-changing honestly. i'm pretty sure i saw you post a snippet from it some days ago too i'm glad it's on both of our minds

"shame means you're guilty, like the rest of us, but you think you're better than we are. maybe you are?" // "disheartening? obviously. i hope it's love. i'm trying really hard to make it love."

"i clawed my way into the light but the light is just as scary. i'd rather quit. i'd rather be sad. it's too much work. admirable? not really. i hate my friends. and when i hate my friends i've failed myself, failed to share my compassion. i shine a light on them of my own making: septic, ugly, the wrong yellow. i mean, maybe it's better if my opponent wins."

i feel like this is also very fitting for ihtctaot but but but but also... for the toji apocalypse au i'm working on. ok this is just me rambling bc i haven't even really talked about it that much so u guys don't know anything lmao (u will u will)

the whole second part just makes me think about how hard it would be living in an apocalypse you know.. you'd want to try to make it work, to make it love, to be in the light but it would be so fucking hard, wouldn't it? and so much work. think about all the heartbreak and the pain, wouldn't it be easier to quit?

and the "shame means your're guilty, like the rest of us, but you think you're better than we are. maybe you are?" is toji. this is for toji. he's acting cocky and he's acting smug, like he knows everything about the world, like he's some immortal creature. like he knows better.

he doesn't. he is filled with shame and everything alike, he's as guilty as the rest of them. he's as bad as the rest of them, he's as good as the rest of them.

[december-rains]

Hi I'm Little!!!!

I'm the little one :333 not December or rains!! But I hereeeeee :3333

[habibisagi]

SHAKES U BY THE SHOULDERS SORAAAA I MISSED U SO BAD IM GOING TO SOB HI HELLO

CASHYYYYY MY GREATLY BELOVED HIIII I MISSED U EVEN MORE TvT!!!!! <3333 I HOPE LIFE HAS BEEN TREATING U AWESOMELY i am squishing u into a hug <333

also HELLOOO i am shaking u by the shoulders back more aggressively HOW ARE U FEELING!!!! HES FINALLY HEREEEEEE UR BLORBO OF ALL TIME OMG i literally thought about you when watching it today actually LMAO i was like i wonder how they're feeling rn,,, i'm sure i'm a couple of hours late on ur live aki posting about the new episode but v_v </3 just know i logged on anticipating ur aki posts and only ur aki posts fr JKSDHKJS i see aki i think of u always <3

[scrawlinginthespicebin]

I found your NSFW side blog~ Hehe

Amber noooooooooo get outta hereeeeee x,3333

[claudiabian]

SHES HEREEEEEE<3333

finally succumbed to watching hotd. btw

[thedivineelite]

can u please do edits of single dash wilder pics, i love ur edits and hope i can see few of cien almas too

hereeeeee you go! and thank you for the love.

http://helluvaclash.tumblr.com/tagged/dash-wilder

http://helluvaclash.tumblr.com/tagged/andrade-cien-almas

[soupdeewoop]

ANSISNEOEEJEOEJESOEKWNEI ITS HEREEEEEE

<3333

yall should give me a realy specific song and describe in a very specific way and ill make an outfit in a moodboard sort-ish manner

you can tell im very good with words

[astoria-reads]

finally settled in my bed with a hot cup of tea!! lets gooooo!!!

Honestly Peter was pretty sure she knew about his extracurricular activities, but still, he was grateful she never mentioned it.

omg i love that hc.

He had made a promise to a couple of friends, specifically Ned

AAAAAAAAA NED'S HERE!!! NED'S HEREEEEEE!!

Peter could’ve sworn that everyone inside was thrown into glitter before entering, every face he saw was covered with it.

I really like that. If I see anyone with glitter on their face, I go <3333

“What, are you pregnant or something?”

I- *facepalms*

it had a certain sadness laced into the beat. It echoed how he felt

STOPPP IM GONNA CRY

Gwen Stacy.

THE FUCK IM GONNA ACTUALLY CRY. in a good way tho

The look pulled at his heartstrings and he clumsily straightened up, crossing his arms in front of him. “How’ve you been?”

look i had to cover my laugh with a cough. this is too wholesome. kind of.

“I’m not– But I’ll figure it out soon, promise.”

POOR BABY

okay first of all, this is AMAZING!!! had a very very shitty day so the best part of it to be sure <3 everything from the multiverse convo to flashbacks of gwen, could it be any better? NO! ITS PERFECT!!

you know why, because y/n being in the sea of gwens reminded me of Percy's mortal link to Annabeth, and entire vibe of this fic gave me euphoria love! (mostly the party, face glitters, istg i was listening to euphoria soundtrack while reading this so maybe thats how i connected the dots sdhjjksf)

so anyway, your fic reminded me of things I love, meaning your fic is officially on the official list of things i love <3

thank you for writing it, cant wait for what happens next. 😩💌

chapter 3. still don't know my name

pairing: tasm!peter parker / fem!reader

genre: romance, hurt/comfort, angst with happy ending

wordcount: 3.4k

content warnings: Peter's POV, alcohol consumption, peter getting really drunk, seeing hallucinations, suffering from dissociation, negative self-talk (peter) , mild depression indicators for reader, another girl flirting with peter and kissing him yes she's based off of haley dunphy because i love her , graphic horror imagery

summary: one night you stop spider-man from almost killing someone, the next day you see your neighbor getting changed into the red and blue suit in the alley.

taglist: @raylan-c , @leydileyla , @kominnfyrirkattarnef , @scandalous-chaos , @kdatthecastle (tell me if you want to be added to the list <3)

I made a playlist for the fic! click here it’s unfinished so feel free to recommend me songs ❤

masterlist

previous / next

The voice of traffic echoed through the streets, bright lights of commercial boards and headlights mimicking the light of the stars above– Only more blinding and less beautiful. Up in the skies, Peter swung and landed on top of the Chrysler Building. He looked down, his eyes searching for a certain octopus that’s been missing for about a week. When all he could see was the common after-work rush, he sat down. His feet dangled as he removed his mask, he was unbelievably tired and sleep deprived. He hadn’t been able to sleep since his temporary move into Aunt May’s. Her poor aunt was so surprised when he came back in the middle of the night, covered in cuts and bruises. Honestly Peter was pretty sure she knew about his extracurricular activities, but still, he was grateful she never mentioned it.

He let out a sharp breath as his mind wandered and thought about everything that led him to this point. Doc Ock hadn’t really been a surprise, Peter had his suspicions after his multiverse adventure so he already was keeping a close eye on him. What he wasn’t expecting was for you to get so involved. He couldn’t have that, not after– Peter furiously shook his head, not wanting to think about it. As long as he was far away from you, you would be safe. He cared little about if he came out as the bad guy or not.

All he had to do was find Doc Ock and everything would be fine. He could go and explain everything to you, making it clear why your feelings– and his to some amount, was dangerous.

Peter put the mask back on, his nose scrunching up as the musty scent filled his nostrils. He mentally added washing the suit to his to-do list. Which, much to his disappointment, wouldn’t be tonight. He had made a promise to a couple of friends, specifically Ned, that he would show up at the club today. Apparently social distancing wasn’t good for his “mental health” , like some crummy club would do him any good.

Peter shot a web to the building across and started swinging. He was on autopilot as he swung, desperately trying to collect his scattered mind. He thought about tonight. It has been a while since he last saw Ned. Peter’s friendship with him had an awkward start, especially on Peter’s end. It was quite shocking to see almost the exact replica of a friend that belonged to another Peter Parker. The only difference that he noticed was the way Ned acted, he seemed much more outgoing, more too cool for school type of guy. Ned Leeds was definitely a player in this universe. The two of them met at the Daily Bugle, he had a story to report and asked for Peter’s help which Peter obviously didn't say no to. He needed the cash.

After that they grew close as friends, Ned had no idea he was Spider-man but he did know about Gwen. Which was why Ned practically begged him to go out and be his wing-man. Though to be fair Ned was quite successful on his own, it was still nice of him to act like he needed a partner. Peter appreciated it.

Peter landed in the alleyway right behind the club. He quickly stripped himself and put on his regular clothes, which in retrospect, shouldn’t be doing in the open anymore. After ruffling his hair and rolling his shoulders, Peter swiftly entered the club, praying that Ned was already there. But as soon as his foot passed the threshold Peter was quick to realize that even if his friend was inside, there was no way he could tell from the crowd.

The colorful flashing lights made him want to hurl, with squinted eyes he elbowed the crowd, trying to reach the bar. Peter could’ve sworn that everyone inside was thrown into glitter before entering, every face he saw was covered with it. He felt off being the only one with bare skin. With his hands in the air he slid between two girls and finally reached the bar, he looked around but saw no sign of Ned. Groaning, he pulled out his phone and squinted as he tried to see if he had any new messages.

“Great, nothing-” he muttered from under his breath.

“You waiting for someone?”

Peter flinched at the sudden shout coming from his right side. Turning, he saw a woman with dark brown hair, she had pink eyeliner and, of course, glitter all over her round face. She had a small nose, full lips and big brown eyes. Peter’s first initial thought was that the woman smiling giddly at him, probably slightly drunk, was very cute.

“Yeah, I’m waiting for a friend,” Peter shouted back, trying to get his voice across.

“A girlfriend?” she asked in a hopeful tone. She batted her eyelashes at him like a cartoon.

Peter chuckled, shaking his head, “No–”

“Haley,” she cut him off, extending her hand. “And you are?”

“Peter,” he replied and shook her hand. “Nice to meet you,”

She grinned, “Can I buy you a drink?”

Peter forced a smile, he internally cursed at Ned and his tardiness. He wasn’t in the mood to mingle with strangers, especially ones that were intoxicated. It a hassle to deal with.

“You seem nice but I can’t,” he shouted. “Sorry,”

Haley shot him a confused look, slowly blinking.

“What, are you pregnant or something?”

Peter opened and closed his mouth. This girl wasn’t going to back down was she? He glanced around once more, the club was filled to the brim and still no sight of Ned Leeds. Peter leaned against the bar’s counter and propped himself with his elbows, his shoulders fell with defeat.

“Not really,” he muttered. “I would love a drink,”

Peter tried hard not to flinch when Haley playfully placed a hand on his shoulder, smiling as she turned to the bartender. Peter didn’t bother to listen to what that order was. At this point he would’ve guzzled savage water if it would numb the emotions stirring in his heart and mind. This was why he didn’t want to come here, every beating heart he came across reminded him of those he couldn’t save. The ones that stopped beating due to him– He quickly blinked, straightening up as the hand on his shoulder disappeared and placed a drink in front of him. When he turned, Peter noticed that he had a scotch on the rocks sitting idly in front of him and Haley held a pink cocktail between her perfectly manicured nails.

He took a sip, appreciating the bitter drink that burned his throat. Haley smiled, scooching closer as she started to converse.

———————————————

Peter had no memory of how it happened but he suddenly found himself on the dance floor. The music was loud and made his ear thud, also somehow the colorful lights had become brighter and more horrendous. Clubs were definitely the worst place to be when you were a heightened-sense superhero. Haley danced in front of him, giggling as she held his hands and placed them on her waist. Bending her knees, she rocked her hips like a snake, pulling Peter closer to her own body. Sensory overload mixed with alcohol was a dangerous thing. Peter felt dizzy, not knowing what else to do other than mimic the movements of everyone around him. He grinded his body against her’s, his lips grazed against her forehead feeling the dampness of her skin. The friction and heat made him crave a dessert he hadn’t had in a long time.

Haley smelled of a mix between sweet and spicy, she tilted her head to the side, exposing her neck– Without even thinking Peter leaned in and kissed right above the artery, his plush lips grazing against the curve. A small whine tore away from Haley’s strawberry smelling lips. He felt her pulse getting faster, her breathing becoming uneven as the base of the music got lower. Peter vaguely remembered hearing the song before, it had a certain sadness laced into the beat. It echoed how he felt. Much better than the typical club music that was playing before–

Then Peter felt a pair of soft lips against his own.

Her lips tasted just how they smelled; strawberries. Peter stood still as she devoured his lips, kissing him with her hands traveling up and down his chest. With the music starting to fade Peter finally closed his eyes and kissed her back, slowly moving his lips alongside her’s. She was…different, the kiss to him felt numb, emotionless and without heat. But his instincts urged him to go on, letting her grind into his hips as his hands squeezed her tiny waist. He slid his tongue between her lips and tasted her, she tasted whatever the hell that pink cocktail was. Something fruity and bitter.

Peter’s pulse quickened and his stomach started to churn. He felt sick, sick, sick, sick– He felt helpless, unable to control a situation he could’ve prevented. The voices of the crowd and the sound of the music faded, his face felt numb. He vaguely could feel Haley’s presence but that also soon faded, fear struck his heart and he finally parted his eyes.

Gwen Stacy.

There was no mistaking it, the platinum blond hair, the big blue eyes, the round face– The same outfit she was wearing when she…died. She was staring at him, her lips thin and her eyes lifeless. Peter’s breathing faltered as he parted away, looking down he realized with horror that Haley had disappeared, leaving Gwen Stacy looking up at him. She was pale faced, her lips purple and eyes clouded. Peter shouted as he scurried back, hitting things that he couldn’t recognize.

“How could you let this happen?” Gwen’s voice echoed, “Why didn’t you save me, Peter?”

Peter’s chest trembled, his breathing faltering as he continued to fall back. Every person in the bar was replaced by her, by her ghost, staring at him, blaming him for what had happened– And rightfully so, Peter’s mind spoke back to him. Gwen followed him until his back was blocked by the bar counter, his fingers twitched and his knees shook. Oddly enough, despite everything that was happening, his spider-sense was dead silent.

Gwen tilted her head, a patch of her blond hair falling to Peter’s feet. He clenched his teeth, her face slowly started to decay in front of him, her skin drying and turning a gray-ish color. Peter closed his eyes, he felt his heart in his throat.

“I’m sorry!” he shouted. “I regret not saving you every day– I’m still thinking of you, Gwen. Reliving it everyday… I’m sorry Gwen,” his voice cracked but his eyes remained shut.

“Peter what’s going on?” a voice asked and Peter quickly turned his head towards it. His eyes blinked open, he could still feel Gwen’s presence, he could still feel her gaze.

Among the sea of Gwen Stacy’s, among all of his ghosts, he saw a familiar silhouette– He saw you. His heart beated two times too fast, you looked at him with worry, walking through the crowd as if there was no one there. He saw you extend your hand and suddenly you were right next to him. Your hand touched the side of his face, forcing him to turn his downcasted gaze upon you. He swallowed right before his lips parted with a gasp.

“Peter snap out of it!”

The next thing Peter heard was the sound of water splashing against his face. He flinched, almost climbing up the bar as he took in quick, panicked breaths. Water dripped down his hair and face.

Gwen had disappeared into the night, so had you. The crowded bar, the loud music, everything was back. Peter blinked a couple of times before everything that had happened registered, his back was against the bar counter and two women stared down at him. One was Haley, she had a frown, her big eyes had worry written all over them. The other was Felicia Hardy, aka Black Cat. A close friend, a reliable, at least most of the time, partner while fighting crime. She wore a red thight crop top with a leather skirt equally as tight as her top. She threw a handful of her white hair over her shoulder and turned to Haley.

“He seems fine now, you can leave him to me.”

Haley’s glance traveled between both him and Felicia, “A–Are you sure?”

“Positive,” Felicia answered with a grin. “We’re close friends don’tg worry, thank you for looking after him,”

“ ‘Kay.”

With that Haley disappeared, leaving a very angry Felicia behind.

“I told Ned this club was a horrible idea, we would be better going to a pub instead,” she elegantly crossed her arms in front of her. “Where the devil is he?”

“Don’t know, he hasn't texted me,”

Felicia’s look softened as she looked down at him. Peter scrambled back up, sitting on one of the bar stools. Finally his racing heart had started to settle. She placed a hand on his shoulder, his mind still scattered, he flinched away.

“Was it her again?”

Peter nodded. He still had trouble collecting his thoughts, a memory of Gwen flashed before his eyes and he squeezed them shut. He let out a shaky breath. Pulling out her phone, Felicia sat down next to him.

“How much did you have to drink?”

“Not enough to get me through tonight,” He turned the stool and ordered a beer for him and a glass of champagne for Felicia. She eyed him suspiciously but if she did have anything to say she had voted against it, her glance falling back to her phone.

She clicked her tongue, “Apparently Ned was preoccupied with Betty, he’s on his way right now,”

“Great,” Peter replied unenthusiastically as the barman placed their drinks. “The more the merrier.”

He felt nothing as he downed the whole bottle.

———————————————

“Peter?”

Peter’s lips twisted into a lopsided smile, the side of his body pressed against the door frame. The wood creaked under his weight and he giggled at the sound. He shook his head, forcing his bloodshot eyes to focus, when they did, he noticed that you were wearing a baggy white shirt and a pair of black sweatpants. His eyes traveled up, the inside of your eyes reflected the feeling of distraught. The look pulled at his heartstrings and he clumsily straightened up, crossing his arms in front of him.

“How’ve you been?”

You wrinkled your nose, presumably because of the heavy scent of alcohol that lingered in his breath.

“It’s 3 AM in the morning,” you replied. “Is everything alright Peter?”

A knot formed in Peter’s throat, he swallowed but it didn’t make it go away. He couldn’t remember what led him here, the last thing he remembered was Felicia asking if he had somewhere to go– After that was a blank.

“Can I come in?” his brows furrowed at how hoarse his voice was.

“Sure,” you replied, scurrying out of the way with urgency.

Your quick scan at his body didn’t go unnoticed by Peter. Probably scanning for wounds, he thought as his pulse quickened. He walked inside and examined his surroundings, it was pretty much the same. Books, the faint scent of coffee, candles- The only unfamiliarity was the heavy blanket on the couch, a blanket clearly for the bedroom, then he noticed the mess on the table– School books, unclean mugs, a half eaten meal. Peter turned to you but before he could say anything you cut him off.

“Ah sorry about the mess,” you passed by him with a nervous laugh. “Let me clean up a bit.”

He watched as you threw the blanket on to the armchair and collected the dishes, quickly dumping them into the sink.

“Would you like anything? Coffee, water?”

“You have any beer?”

Despite being unadvised many times by both Felicia and Ned, Peter couldn’t help it. He couldn’t remember what he was here for, he only chased a feeling, the longing for comfort. And when he thought of comfort, funnily enough, he thought of you. Drunken or not, his hallucination of Gwen was still vivid in his mind along with the image of you parting the sea of ghosts like a breath of fresh air. The only thing Peter knew was that he needed to see you, be it wrong or right.

Soon you returned to the living room, placing a bottle in front of him and sitting on the armchair across from the couch. Peter took the bottle and downed the contents inside, his Adam's apple bobbing up and down with each gulp. He sensed that your anxiety was growing with every passing minute, you started to gently hit your upper thighs with your palms, the soft pitter patters filled the room.

“So,” you broke the silence, lips curling up with a nervous smile. “Have you found Doc Ock yet?”

Peter shook his head and chuckled with the beer bottle still between his lips. He gently placed it back on the table.

“No,” he replied. “I have no idea what he’s planning, I feel like I should, considering other versions of myself fought with him before–”

“Other versions?”

Peter’s lips parted when you cut him off, he turned to you and squeezed his eyes shut, then he opened them again. He was trying to focus, and trying to remember.

“You know, like other me’s but in another universe? Ah, like a multiverse,”

“Peter, how drunk are you?”

His heart sank at your words. Wide-eyed, Peter turned his glance down to his hands, his fingers twitched. His body felt almost frozen.

No no no no no no she doesn’t understand.

Gwen would understand.

Gwen would know what I was talking about.

She doesn’t understand.

Peter felt frantic. His pulse quickening and heart beating in his throat, he was spiraling. He didn’t know what to do anymore, he had no guidance, no help, an octopus on the loose and the ghosts of his past haunting him day and night. Peter curled up, his knees touching his sweaty forehead and fingers maniacally scratching his nape. His mind felt numb and all he could do was fall further into his thoughts, memories of a past he so desperately wanted to forget. You could never be her. It was impossible to find someone like her, she was one of a kind. A snowflake. And she’s still gone.

A hand on his knee.

The touch brought goosebumps to his skin. It was a kind touch, the inside of your palm covering his knee, your thumb grazing against it. You said something– Something soothing Peter imagined. His heart rate slowed down, so did his breathing. Your voice soothed him like a lullaby, it made him come back and see where he was once more.

Then he saw you.

Your forehead was pressed against the back of your hand that was holding his knee, you had moved to the floor, still muttering things that Peter couldn’t quite hear. Tears pricked the corner of his eyes and his breath got caught in his throat. You weren’t Gwen– Far from it. But you were a perfect version of what you were, someone good, broken maybe but good nevertheless.

Prompting you to look up, Peter touched the side of your face. His breath hitched when he noticed the wetness of your eyes, the dark circles underneath it. He leaned down. It was as if time stopped. An inch away from your face his breath lingered in the air, swallowing, he closed the distance and captured your lips with a kiss. It was much more different compared to the kiss at the club. You tasted like brown sugar and mildly of coffee, your lips were cracked but soft. Peter took in a deep breath, tasting you one last time before pulling back.

Your shock was written all over your face, if he was in the right head-space Peter might’ve laughed.

“Sorry,” he slurred instead. “I…should go,”

He attempted to get up but fell back down, your hand was still on his knee. Peter looked down only to be greeted by your glare and frown.

“What the hell is going on?” you hissed. “Are you okay? Just tell me please,”

His heart shattered at the way your voice trembled. He sighed, taking your hand and placing a gentle kiss on top as he picked himself off of the couch.

“I’m not– But I’ll figure it out soon, promise.”

Without waiting for an answer Peter left. He stumbled across the hall and for the first time in while he stayed at his own apartment.

A/N: to be notified of future work follow @burnthoneymintsathenaeum​ and turn on notifications✨