#BUT ALSO the actual plot to that movie like take away the visuals and the concepts behind it

[armoricaroyalty]

Film Grammar for Simmers

What is film grammar?

"Film grammar" refers the unstated "rules" of editing used in movies and TV. Different types of shots have different associations and are used by editors to convey different types of information to the audience. Many of these principles were first described in the early 20th century by Soviet directors, but they're used consistently across genre, medium, and even language: Bollywood musicals, English period dramas, Korean horror movies, and American action blockbusters all use many of the same techniques.

Because these rules are so universal, virtually everyone has some internalized understanding of them. Even if they can’t name the different types of shots or explain how editors use images to construct meaning, the average person can tell when the “rules” are being broken. If you’ve ever thought a movie or episode of TV was confusing without being able to say why, there’s a good chance that there was something off with the editing.

Learning and applying the basics of film grammar can give your story a slicker and more-polished feel, without having to download shaders or spend hours in photoshop. It also has the bonus of enhancing readability by allowing your audience to use their knowledge of film and TV to understand what's happening in your story. You can use it to call attention to significant plot details and avoid introducing confusion through unclear visual language.

Best of all, it doesn't cost a dime.

The basics: types of shots

Shots are the basic building block of film. In Sims storytelling, a single shot is analogous to a single screenshot. In film, different types of shots are distinguished by the position of the camera relative to the subject. There are three big categories of shots, with some variation: long shots (LS), medium shots (MS), and close-ups (CU). This diagram, created by Daniel Chandler and hosted on visual-memory.co.uk illustrates the difference:

Source: The 'Grammar' of Television and Film, Daniel Chandler, visual-memory.co.uk. Link.

In film, scenes typically progress through the different types of shots in sequence: long shot, medium shot, close-up. When a new scene begins and the characters arrive in a new location, we typically begin with a wide establishing shot of the building’s exterior to show the audience where the scene will be taking place. Next comes a long shot of an interior space, which tells the where the characters are positioned relative to one another. The next shot is a medium shot of the characters conversing, and then finally, a close-up as the conversation reaches its emotional or informational climax. Insert shots are used judiciously throughout to establish themes or offer visual exposition.

Here's another visual guide to the different types of shots, illustrated with stills from Disney animated films.

This guide is almost 2,000 words long! To save your dash, I've put the meat of it under the cut.

Long shot and extreme long shots

A long shot (sometimes also called a wide shot) is one where the entire subject (usually a building, person, or group of people) is visible within the frame. The camera is positioned far away from the subject, prioritizing the details of the background over the details of the subject.

One of the most common uses of long shots and extreme long shots are establishing shots. An establishing shot is the first shot in a scene, and it sets the tone for the scene and is intended to give the viewer the information they’ll need to follow the scene: where a scene is taking place, who is in the scene, and where they are positioned in relation to one another. Without an establishing shot, a scene can feel ungrounded or “floaty.” Readers will have a harder time understanding what’s happening in the scene because on some level, they’ll be trying to puzzle out the answers to the who and where questions, distracting them from the most important questions: what is happening and why?

(I actually like to start my scenes with two establishing shots: an environmental shot focusing on the scenery, and then a second shot that establishes the characters and their position within the space.)

Long shots and extreme long shots have other uses, as well. Because the subject is small relative to their surroundings, they have an impersonal effect which can be used for comedy or tragedy.

In Fargo (1996) uses an extreme long shot to visually illustrate the main character’s sense of defeat after failing to secure funding for a business deal.The shot begins with a car in an empty parking lot, and then we see the protagonist make his way up from the bottom of the frame. He is alone in the shot, he is small, and the camera is positioned above him, looking down from a god-like perspective. All of these factors work together to convey his emotional state: he’s small, he’s alone, and in this moment, we are literally looking down on him. This shot effectively conveys how powerless he feels without any dialogue or even showing his face.

The same impersonal effect can also be used for comic purposes. If a character says something stupid or fails to impress other characters, cutting directly from a close-up to a long shot has a visual effect akin to chirping crickets. In this instance, a long shot serves as a visual “wait, what?” and invites the audience to laugh at the character rather than with them.

Medium Shots

Medium shots are “neutral” in filmmaking. Long shots and close-ups convey special meaning in their choice to focus on either the subject or the background, but a medium shot is balanced, giving equal focus to the character and their surroundings. In a medium shot, the character takes up 50% of the frame. They’re typically depicted from the waist-up and the audience can see both their face and hands, allowing the audience to see the character's facial expression and read their body-language, both important for interpreting meaning.

In most movies and TV shows, medium shots are the bread and butter of dialogue-heavy scenes, with close-ups, long shots, and inserts used for punctuation and emphasis. If you’re closely following the conventions of filmmaking, most of your dialogue scenes will be medium shots following the convention of shot-reverse shot:

To keep long conversations from feeling too visually monotonous, consider staging the scene as a walk-and-talk. Having two characters move through a space can add a lot of dynamism and visual interest to a scene that might otherwise feel boring or stiff.

Close Ups

Close-ups are close shots of a character’s face. The camera is positioned relatively near to the subject, showing just their head and shoulders. In a close-up, we don’t see any details of the background or the expressions of other characters.

In film, close-ups are used for emphasis. If a character is experiencing a strong emotion or delivering an important line of dialogue, a close-up underscores the importance of the moment by inviting the audience to focus only on the character and their emotion.

Close-ups don’t necessarily need to focus on the speaker. If the important thing about a line of dialogue is another character’s reaction to it, a close-up of the reaction is more effective than a close-up of the delivery.

One of the most iconic shots in Parasite (2019) is of the protagonist driving his employer around while she sits in the backseat, speaking on the phone. Even though she’s the one speaking, the details of her conversation matter less than the protagonist’s reaction to it. While she chatters obliviously in the background, we focus on the protagonist’s disgruntled, resentful response to her thoughtless words and behavior.

In my opinion, Simblr really overuses close-ups in dialogue. A lot of conversation scenes are framed entirely in close-ups, which has the same effect of highlighting an entire page in a textbook. The reader can’t actually tell what information is important, because the visuals are screaming that everything is important. Overusing close-ups also cuts the viewer off from the character’s body language and prevents them from learning anything about the character via their surroundings.

For example, a scene set in someone’s bedroom is a great opportunity for some subtle characterization—is it tidy or messy? what kind of decor have they chosen? do they have a gaming computer, a guitar, an overflowing bookshelf?—but if the author chooses to use only close-ups, we lose out on a chance to get to know the character via indirect means.

Inserts

An insert shot is when a shot of something other than a character’s face is inserted into a scene. Often, inserts are close-ups of a character’s hands or an object in the background. Insert shots can also be used to show us what a character is looking at or focusing on.

In rom-com The Prince & Me (2004) (see? I don’t just watch crime dramas…) the male lead is in an important meeting. We see him pick up a pen, look down at the papers in front of him, and apparently begin taking notes, but then we cut to an insert shot of his information packet. He’s doodling pictures of sports cars and is entirely disengaged from the conversation. Every other shot in the scene is an establishing shot or a medium shot or a close-up of someone speaking, but this insert gives us insight into the lead’s state of mind: he doesn’t want to be there and he isn’t paying attention.

Insert shots are, in my opinion, also used ineffectively on Simblr. A good insert gives us extra insight into what a character is thinking or focusing on, but a poorly-used insert feels…unfocused. A good insert might focus on pill bottles on a character’s desk to suggest a chemical dependency, on a family picture to suggest duty and loyalty, on a clock to suggest a time constraint, on a pile of dirty laundry or unanswered letters to suggest a character is struggling to keep up with their responsibilities. An ineffective insert shot might focus on the flowers in the background because they’re pretty, on a character’s hands because it seems artsy, on the place settings on a dining table because you spent forever placing each one individually and you’ll be damned if they don’t make it into the scene. These things might be lovely and they might break up a monotonous conversation and they might represent a lot of time and effort, but if they don’t contribute any meaning to a scene, consider cutting or repurposing them.

I want to emphasize: insert shots aren’t bad, but they should be carefully chosen to ensure they’re enhancing the meaning of the scene. Haphazard insert shots are distracting and can interfere with your reader’s ability to understand what is happening and why.

Putting it all together

One of the most basic principles of film theory is the Kuleshov effect, the idea that meaning in film comes from the interaction of two shots in sequence, and not from any single shot by itself. In the prototypical example, cutting from a close-up of a person’s neutral expression to a bowl of soup, children playing, or soldiers in a field suggests hunger, worry, or fear, respectively.

The Kuleshov effect is the essence of visual storytelling in a medium like Simblr. You can elevate your storytelling by thinking not only about each individual shot, but about the way they’ll interact and flow into one another.

Mastering the basics of film grammar is a great (free!) way to take your storytelling to the next level. To learn more, you can find tons of guides and explainers about film grammar for free online, and your local library doubtless has books that explain the same principles and offers additional analysis.

Happy simming!

[agentnico]

Dune: Part Two (2024) review

I’m fully aware that the Dune sequel has been hit by acclaim from both critics and audiences, and I shall share my own thoughts in due course, but also whilst presenting itself as a serious and sophisticated piece of artsy science fiction tackling challenging themes of religion and politics, from a marketing standpoint this film has been a major farcical meme. From the popcorn buckets shaped like suggestive sand worms (or more so accurately as deformed buttholes) to the viral TikTok video of an unnamed man riding a makeshift sand worm around a cinema lobby on his way to Arrakis, or more likely to one of the gazillion screenings of Dune: Part Two. But yes, absolutely mad bonkers advertising techniques, and not at all reflective of how seriously and straight faced the actual film plays. Anyway, let’s talk Duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuneee…..

Plot: Paul Atreides unites with Chani and the Fremen while seeking revenge against the conspirators who destroyed his family. Facing a choice between the love of his life and the fate of the universe, he must prevent a terrible future only he can foresee.

Controversial opinion - I was not a fan of the first Dune. I thought it was all spectacle and no substance, and even then in regards to said spectacle, it was just sand. Lots of sand and bland dark visuals. I understand that the first movie acts as a massive exposition piece with lots of world building and introductions of all the characters and various political families and the spice trade and all that sweet jazz, but honestly it all felt so dragged out. Also a lot of narrative choices felt really immature and I did not buy it. In fact, the only memorable part for me was that female voice screaming on the music score every time something crazy happened, and my does that woman have some strong vocal pipe work! Like damn, her screams…. I really felt them!

Going into Dune: Part Two, I was very much of two mindsets. One was more so a feeling of obligation to watch it, as I wasted 3 hours of my life watching the first one that I felt I deserved some kind of closure for my efforts. The other being Denis Villeneuve. Aside from the first Dune, he’s a director that has constantly impressed me with his unique vision and style. Simply look at his past filmography! Prisoners. Enemy. Arrival. Sicario. All impressive pieces of genre filmmaking. Then there’s Blade Runner 2049, that took the classic Ridley Scott movie and managed to improve on it and become one of the most thrilling science fiction epics of the last decade. Also the trailers looked appropriately exciting, and it seemed like the second movie was actually gonna deal with some serious shit finally. Again, my problem with the first Dune wasn’t that it was slow. I mean, I can happily watch Paris, Texas any day of the week and be mesmerised by the empty yet beautiful takes of the American desert. It’s more-so that the first Dune felt aimless and messy. As for Dune: Part Two?

Well, if we’re going to use The Lord of the Rings terminology, and boy am I happy to refer to the dear-to-my-heart Middle Earth whenever I have the chance, then Dune: Part Two holds the scale of The Two Towers. I may not agree with all of it, and there are still some moments that drag, though The Two Towers is also guilty of that - I’m looking at you Treebeard! But overall this is one hell of a cinematic experience and achievement. Visually for one this is eye-candy. And yes, yet again there’s lots of sand, but this time around Villeneuve manages to find very creative ways to add/take away colour to make many sequences truly impressive. There’s an early scene where the Fremen are fighting Harkonnen goons in the desert and the entire thing is seeped in this blood orange palette, reminiscent of the Martian Chronicles, and then there’s the part where we are introduced to the Harkonnen home planet where the entire screen is drenched in hardcore intense black-and-white due to their sun only giving out white and black light, and instead of fireworks there are these watercolour stroked exploding in the sky, to of course the much talked about eye-dropping sand worm riding into battle scene that had the feel of the giant elephants appearing in The Return of the King, and yes that was another most delightful reference to Lord of the Rings! As I was saying though, the entire movie visually is certainly something to be in awe of.

Also Hans Zimmer’s score!! Of course the man’s a genius, having composed so many of cinema’s greatest musical compositions. I can recommend his Live in Prague performance! Hit after hit, and I find myself spinning it on my record player a good few times. Hans Zimmer’s Dune: Part Two soundtrack feels like a thunderously bombastic continuation and expansion of the first film’s more quiet and moody opener, and that shift in tone allows for some truly spectacular weaving of the composer’s thematic tapestry for Dune – with the finest new thread being the absolutely gorgeous love theme for Paul and Chani. A truly beautiful piece that echoes the heartbreaking tragic nature of the central romance of the film. Needless to say I’ve already pre-ordered the limited edition coloured vinyl of Dune 2’s soundtrack from Mutant (the new Mondo).

As for the narrative, as that is where I felt the first film faltered the most in my humble opinion (which I share so publicly online). I really do feel like the sequel is a major set up, for since the first one focused more on the endless word building and set-ups, this movie is all about the character developments. The scope is still big with the various political and religious elements that are tackled and explored throughout, however at the same time Dune: Part Two manages to feel more intimate compared to its predecessor, with the unravelling of the romance between Paul and Chani, but more so the inner struggles of Paul Atreides, as he tries to balance his emotions of revenge with the feeling of wanting to belong somewhere, as well as his denial of being called the so-called Messiah to the Fremen people. Look, the idea of the chosen one has been a concept that has been done over and over again, however I felt here they managed to really make it feel unique and different, with Paul choosing not to take this major responsibility due to visions of the future where he sees this choice result in darkness and dread, yet at the same time realising he has no choice but to follow his destiny and calling. It’s powerful stuff.

The cast list is stacked in this one. Timothee Chalamet is a rising star, having previously excelled his dramatic chops in Call Me by Your Name and his charismatic whimsy in last year’s Wonka, but this is by far his most impressive acting feat. You truly feel his character turning from boy to man, and it’s a real and raw performance. Zendaya shares great chemistry with him, but also in her own right gives a strong turn as a warrior Fremen conflicted with what she sees and thinks. Javier Bardem’s Stilgar adds a slice of surprising humour to the mix, being so obsessed with Paul being part of the prophecy that anything he’d do, Stilgar would find that to be part of what has been foretold. Paul Atreides could literally fart and Stilgar would observe in wonder proclaiming “as it was written”. There’s also a tiny No Country for Old Men reunion with Bardem being joined by Josh Brolin, who’s alright by the way, though it’s a typical Brolin brute role. Charlotte Rampling as the Reverend Mother continues being truly despicable and honestly that wench deserves to be put in her place - the movie’s ending is very satisfying in this regard. There’s also some newcomers to the Dune world too. Florence Pugh as the Princess reminded me a lot of Padme from Star Wars, and Christopher Walken I felt was tad miscast as the Emperor. Don’t get me wrong, Walken is a great actor, but his way of speech has been impersonated and overdone so many times that it is difficult to take him seriously in a role like this. Minus a couple of strong deliveries Walken felt really lazy here. You know who wasn’t lazy though? Austin Butler! This guy understood the assignment, playing the psychotic nutter Feyd-Rautha and he’s truly unrecognisable. Even his voice is different. Gone is Elvis and in cometh his Skarsgard impression! He’s brutal and maniacal and was honestly superb, and I wish there was more of him in this movie.

Again, it’s far from a perfect movie. There are parts still that drag, and certain times where things feel surprisingly rushed, but overall this is an experience through and through, and unlike my feelings after the first film, here I find myself really looking forward to the inevitable third part. In fact f*ck it, who am I kidding - this movie is bloody incredible!! Like I can’t even - it’s abso-fricking-lutely spectacular!! And by the way I read a bit about the Frank Herbert Dune books now and the future sequels are gonna be mad, just saying. Paul’s son becomes this half-man half-worm known as the God Emperor! Things are gonna get weird! Anyway, Dune: Part Two - go see it if you haven’t already. And in Austin Butler’s voice: “may thy knife chip and shatter”.

Overall score: 9/10

[joons]

barbie is a fun, clever, visual feast with some lovely moments that i am happy to see resonate with people. the movie is definitely worth seeing. but i would only give the film a 3.5/5.

i am now going to talk at length about my thoughts on the film, most of which will be an attempt to understand what is being said here.

i think barbie's acceptance of the gender wars as inevitable and perpetual ends up being more regressive than a lot of what it's trying to critique. it mostly ends in a healthier place, but along the way, it has little ability to make meaning outside of that frame. i loved the interactions barbie had with older women, particularly ruth, and i think there's a wonderful message there about girls needing both aspirational role models and grounded older mentors who can help them manage any obstacles they find. what a wonderful theme, and one that is given subtle, genuine weight, which i prefer over the more overt, "telling" moments the film does throughout. but a lot of the story gets sidetracked in assuming women's role is tricking men (a role foisted on them as a reaction to the patriarchy, so don't blame them) and that any true reconciliation or mutual support between men and women is only based on pity. i think the film could have landed better as a reflection on womanhood if it actually dared to be about ... women. if it could imagine women as more. if it truly tried to show the complex roller-coaster of emotions instead of staying stuck in one gear.

i have seen people say how ironic it is that ken is the best part of a barbie film, but it's true, on even deeper levels than people realize. why is ken the only one with true agency, whose feelings are true to himself and not a reflection of someone playing with him? where is the boy playing with his sister's dolls and desperately trying to understand why he feels so inadequate? why are those questions never asked in a film that generates endless questions and observations about human frailty? none of the barbies are capable of doing anything for themselves; they are easily brainwashed by the kens, and all it takes to shake them out of it is a speech about how "complex" women are. kens just have to accept themselves as they are to be happy; barbies have to believe they are doing something productive and worthwhile. except main barbie, who feels like she can't do anything meaningful, because this movie thinks the different barbies are genuinely incapable of doing something if they don't have an outfit to go with it. if the point is that she feels less than because she has seen the real world and feels unprepared for it, well, none of the other barbies would have fared better. astronaut barbie couldn't get a job at nasa, just like beach ken can't get a job at beach. the one time we see barbie make a choice for herself, unprompted by others, unburdened from her anxieties, is to ... go to the gynecologist. um. empowering. i guess.

(i think the ken/barbie plot would have worked better if they were "packaged" together. there's no real reason this ken has the crisis, why barbie feels any special responsibility for him.)

the fact that barbie begins to feel angst and anxiety as a result of real women's insecurities is fascinating; in being the avatar of girls' hopes, she also becomes their "competition," a symbol of all their grief and all their inadequacies. maybe you can see how kens get off easy here; they are not evolved enough; they will never be chosen by the gods as friends or idols or objects of hatred. that could have been explored more, especially through the mother-daughter relationship. why do teenagers begin pulling away from their mothers? perhaps for the same reason they grow out of barbie, because they want to be something beyond the touchstones of femininity they have. they want to be their own person and have to separate themselves, but the girls their age are obsessed with tearing each other down and taking their insecurities out on each other because they feel broken. barbie was experiencing that rejection for the first time. the film could have had something to say about how women can be cruel to one another as they struggle to find their own paths, but it's understandable and part of learning to identify what feels real and true to you. but none of the human characters have enough screentime to address any of this.

i liked the point that women dolls are saddled with the same impossible standards that many women feel. they're blamed in society for women's insecurities and also become totemic, like, "we gave you barbie, what more do you want?" i get that, i get the frustration that animates some of the plot, but i couldn't relate to it all that much. but it does ring true for me that b a r b i e as a concept, a company, a doll, is not the problem or the solution. she's just cool.

("why not make barbies that are relatable and normal?" the movie suggests. oh my god....... 💀 💀 💀 what year is this?)

i think allan (almost inadvertently, or at least subtly) makes the movie's best point: the lack of expectations can be an incredible gift. without them, you are free to become your own person on your own time instead of feeling less than because you're comparing yourself to others. we must all be allan. allan is our friend.

there are honestly so many smart concepts and sly commentary here that feel buried in Telling Not Showing; like the ken war was SO funny, and it would have hit hard if we saw the barbies struggling to find a way to understand and interact with the kens ... and they decide to play nice before realizing jealousy and competition seem to motivate the kens ... and then the kens do the most ken thing and do a normandy reenactment to gain women's attention. that's so archetypal, such a funny nod to the cyclical weirdness of human history, to the idea that women (and men) work within the system that is created for or against them, using the tools they have, living up to the gender roles/models they've been taught! but because the characters are like "i know what we will do. we will manipulate them and then they will go to war because they are men!" it's like ... ugh. it messes up the pacing of that whole sequence. it kills the surprise and delight of watching it unfold, so all we can react to are the sight gags (giving mouth to mouth to the horse lmaoooo) and the juxtoposition of war film and gene kelly musical. but the actual gender role commentary is stated so explicitly, afraid to question itself, afraid to say anything surprising or insightful, that it amounts to putting everyone right back in their box. the film tries to balance this at the end, pitying patriarchy as a cope against death, trying to empower the kens to be themselves, but it refuses to imagine any true healing or change, anything beyond "well, kids need to imagine barbieland as a matriarchal utopia, even though we have established that doing so leaves them unprepared for a world of unfair standards they can't control." all women can expect to do is fight for a land of dreams, but always know that the most that land can achieve is creating an image that will be sold back to them as empowerment. genuinely, what the FUCK is the point of this film. oh, it's too hard to say that imagination is what makes us human and that ultimately means more than the object. again, the film will outright state some version of this idea ("I want to do the imagining, I don't want to be the idea"), but every other part of the plot undercuts it with its own failure to imagine women as more than reactive.

and it had the chance to let women be real characters! (hell, does this movie even remember that barbie has Lore, a Family, a Last Name, that she hasn't been "just a doll" in a long, long time?) but the film seems to set up plots that would have given us organic interactions and fully realized characters. i got so excited when america's character, gloria, showed up, because okay, we're going to be able to explore womanhood through the eyes of a real person, we're going to see the push and pull between idealized utopias and dreams and real-world survival and hope and despair by learning more about her. but no. gloria is there to give a speech that doesn't sum up her life and her passions but all women in very generic terms. it's not experiential, it's definitional (and it's a definition built on what a woman is not -- not this, not this, can't be that). it is relying on the audience to point and say, "i recognize that," instead of building gloria as a person we love and know and laugh and cry with. you are building a wall between the story and your audience; if they never had "complicated feelings" about barbie, if they aren't sure why gloria cares so much about the doll while her daughter has such a negative reaction, then it is not going to let them in and explain that. it is going to say, "if you don't get it, you are brainwashed, probably, or a man, and you don't want to see it, and i am not going to open it up to you because it is an exclusive club, intentionally, because it is the only club we have, and i am not going to open it up to further ridicule or commentary, even though that is what this entire movie is doing." gah! tell a story! tell a STORY! surprise me! why are we just pointing at things?

i'm telling you, when barbie sits on that bench and has an interaction with an older lady, who is totally at ease in her own skin, who is un-selfconscious and not angry and peaceful, it brought immediate tears to my eyes. it was such a breath of fresh air. a real person, reacting in a way that surprises and moves you. what was her story. who is she. what is her secret to confidence and balance, and how can women share that with one another. no no no, go go go, take on capitalism and patriarchy until you're too tired to remember how to laugh, this is healthy and good. @~@

ultimately i am talking about the themes i wish were there or wish were more emphasized because the messages that are there feel contradictory. for instance, the kens' patriarchy is shallow and cartoonish, both in barbieland and the real world (that mattel executives were just as stupid and pointless as TOY PEOPLE was so INTERESTING to me; like what does it mean that men can still "play," and get paid enormously for it? but it's kind of just "isn't this dumb"), and the barbies are more than happy to manipulate their kens' emotions to get what they want. america ferrera tells barbie she is justified to feel mad at ken for what he did to her and her friends. but in the next scene, barbie comforts ken and connects to his feelings of vulnerability. it feels like the movie is rolling its eyes through the scene, when it could have been a really beautiful, sweet moment where humanity is recognized as universal, a true "man was not meant to be alone" moment of meaning, turned inside out and shaken and reconfigured as complementary and supportive, where barbie and ken realize community is crucial to weathering their own insecurities and flawed emotional responses, and maybe you can need someone without making it your whole personality. maybe the fear of connection is something all girls start to struggle with as they become teenagers, and they need that world where men don't want anything from them, and they want to cling to it a little longer than necessary. but because it's been bookended with "of course he's going to cry about it, don't give in, it's not your job to support him," the emotional core of the scene is undercut by shallower stuff. the scene genuinely reads like "placating men is important and you should do it," which is INSANE to me, but that's what is coming across with the wild whiplash between rage and sweetness, denying kens any humanity the whole film and trying to patch it up right at the end. barbie's ennui stems from the fact that a weary mother is playing with her, but the rest of the barbies - and the film as a whole - feel puppeted by the surly teenager who has not moved beyond rage-filled one-liners. i don't like that this is the case because those moments of human connection (barbie with the older woman on the bench, the mother-daughter relationship, even ken trying to understand why he cares so much what other people think of him) are so great. we're just supposed to ... not apply compassion to characters the film doesn't like. and we are supposed to like the characters we do like not because we are experiencing their lives with them but because they are saying The Right Things Loudly.

(and don't you love how the film even has a prepackaged response to being criticized? wanting men to be real people is brainwashed behavior. wanting women to have thoughts that go beyond regurgitated feminism 101 catchphrases is asking too much of a plastic toy. it's just a reflection or reality, see, but it's also exaggerated satire. i think the glib tone just crept into everything and made for some wild subtext that i don't even think the film recognizes.)

greta gerwig is more successful at dealing with the tension between made "things" and real life in little women. jo, as a stand-in for louisa may alcott, is resistant to getting jo "married off" and only caves in to get the book published. but the life and joy still sing in the scene where she reunites with bhaer, even when the audience is already primed to see it as artificial and cynical. the play between what jo says she wants and what jo indulges in is obvious; we can find joy and light even in the things that feel like a compromise of our principles. sometimes they are better than life, better than what we could imagine, they take on lives of their own, they become little women who exist off the page and no longer have to carry the burden of being "The One Narrative For Women" because they spark thousands of other stories and hopes and longings that the author doesn't have to be responsible for. as much as i waffle on whether i like the ending of gerwig's little women, it's clear that part of greta is throwing up her hands, in a "but what do i know?" gesture ... indulgent romance might just be the little antidote we need to stave off the lonely feelings we get sometimes. it's not weak, it's not a compromise, it's just cool.

for whatever reason, she doesn't bring that same verve or ambiguity to this film; she can't infuse barbie with meaning beyond what her critics say about her. barbies, like women, have to be perfect, but they can't be. they can't be totems, but they are. we must get away from them, but we can't. they are creations of men, but women can't think their way out of the box. barbie is an immortal ideal, but none of what she symbolizes has any impact.

"that's the point. it's complicated," greta says to me. "my job here is done."

"but declaring things complicated is not a point of view!" i yell back. "you didn't do anything!"

maybe i am too invested in barbie to even recognize that people have such negative feelings about her. maybe i have seen this premise done better in the lego movie, teen beach movie, barbie: life in the dreamhouse! (all of which genuinely love toys and kids/teen media and are not using them to sort out their own disgruntled feelings — and have a genuine belief that even flawed media bankrolled into existence can be real art, something gerwig seems so skeptical about that she lets her ambivalence about taking on this particular directorial gig become the driving tension in the story. how ... relatable?) maybe i have unresolved issues with greta's themes from little women and am now realizing how little she seems to get the things that matter to me, and we just need to part ways.

as anthony lane writes in the new yorker, "maybe the movie is for greta gerwig. and, by extension, for anyone as super-smart as her—former barbiephiles, preferably, who have wised up and put away childish things."

to that, i'd put a quote from c.s. lewis, whose work greta will soon try to get her hands around: "when i became a man i put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up." the soul shudders at a narnia, a barbieland, a march family home, that are only notable for how "complicated" our feelings about them are supposed to be, and i think that puts my thoughts on greta's work into words.

now ... proust barbie, i would buy.

[alvin-draper]

Alien: Romulus

spoilers!

let's chat. and also preface with the fact I've only seen alien and Aliens before, both of which I adore and rewatch endlessly.

I've seen some reviewers talk about this, but Andy carried that movie character wise. Everyone else was good - props to the weird cousin guy. He was a dick but he added some much needed internal group conflict.

Andy and Rain - she was weirdly cookie cutter in a very video game protagonist kinda way. She had a goal: get off planet. She had a brother who she viewed both as person and as pet. Something to be loved and coddled. At no point was she ready for him to have more agency. From the minute you knew she'd decided to leave him behind, you could plot the course of her entire arc. Andy was better. I was worried they were doing a weirdly placed take on adults with strong autism to start with, and was kinda relieved to find out he was artificial with a buggy system, and then realised that actually no the comparison still 100% works, but I like how they played it. He gets agency with intelligence, but it's at the cost of losing his human connections. His little sister, and the friends he's an outlier to. He never feels integrated into the group, always slightly on the outside. When he gets his new chip and directive, I read it as equal parts programming and rebellion. It took away some of his desire to do anything for Rain, and replaced it with pragmatism. But you can see its still him in there, and that he's mad about them leaving him behind. He keeps making decisions to keep Rain alive, but he focuses in on her life rather than her emotional needs, and lets other people die. It still reads as love, to me. But instead of her sacrificing him for her better life, he sacrificed her emotional wellbeing for both of them to live. Definitely the character with the most intricacy.

As said, everyone else and everything else felt kind of cookie cutter. The characters don't make interesting decisions. Its still well written and well done: you understand the how'd and whys of every decision they make. But none of them shine enough to keep up with Andy.

Okay, enough character stuff. Let's talk everything else.

The score and sound mixing: incredible. Loved that it started on that deep space silence. The music is good and more than functional, will probably listen to the soundtrack as a background for a while. The best choice sound wise in the whole movie is when she floats out the bottom of the cargo bay in the final act and the sound cuts almost completely. You could've heard a pin drop.

The look of the thing: impeccable. The minute they get onto those prowling H G Geiger ships I was sold on the whole thing. The wires and curves and me grin so hard. Less excellent alien hiding places than I would've liked, but they didn't use that trick too many times so it worked out. The red and orange lighting in the dark rooms gave the movie a very distinct aesthetic, separate from the other Alien movies that I've seen. And of course the shot composition was glorious. One of my favourite visuals was in the water filled cyro fuel room, when Andy freezes and reboots. Hi standing stock still as the camera pans up and we the audience understand: oh shit, that's a lot of facehuggers.

Things they set up and paid off: the pregnancy. Andy slipping a vial of the compound into his pocket. The X Ray scanner. The dropped key. The gravity timer. Just about the security cameras. Things they didn't quite pay off: the temperature sensing device. The facehuggers travelling through the vents. The sharp edges and quick mechanical closing of the vent covers they get into the ship through.

Shit that came out of nowhere: all the goddamn fully grown xenomorphs. That bit was pretty out of left field. I had anticipated there being more Aliens, but they fact they left it so late doesn't really make much internal sense. I guess because they were in the other half of the outpost?

Callbacks I loved: the Nostromo at the start and the vague references to Ripley. Rook being Ash. That was gooooood. Also shows that the companies whole thing in Aliens that synthetics aren't like that anymore is kind of bollocks.

That fucking thing: I'm calling it Romulus for obvious reasons. I thought the design was excellent. So fucking horrifying. I will be having nightmares. Its like they reached into my subconscious and designed it specifically to get to me. Incredible. Didn't like the fact it roared I think if it had made either an Alien hiss or a human noise it would've been way more compelling. Properly horrifying though. Really hit home that it's a horror movie more than anything else. Also. The death scenes in the movie? Incredible. It did those Well. My favourite was absolutely the acid blood literally burning a whole through that guys chest, because it was visceral and brutal and horrifying and so so hell done. You could really feel the panic and tension and still clock him scrabbling at his chest just to melt his fingers and feeling sick all over again. Just brilliant.

Overall: it was good! It sucks that I only really liked Andy, and he only really atarts coming into his own after Rain betrays him. Still fucked she took his autonomy away again at the end, even if their quipping was cute. Loved them raising the temperature of that room as a disguise that was inspired. Loved them turning off the Gravity to shoot the Aliens that also worked great. The elevator was also a good set piece. The biggest let down in this movie is the characters. Andy's great, Rain is alright, and sos the cousin who's only around for the firstish act. Bit the main side character guy, who's sisters pregnant? I don't even remember his name. They kept hinting at there being both backstories for him and for Rain that were more interesting than what he got. For him, some kind of genuine military past. For her: she'd been to Yvaga before. Maybe even grew up there as a little kid. It was an opportunity to add proper dimension to both characters that was squandered in favor of the crazier action scenes, which sucks. This movie was in dire need of clearer and deeper characters, particularly because in my eyes that'd what Alien does best, and Aliens takes a really good stab at considering the larger main cast.

Essentially. It's a good damn horror movie, but I'm not sure it's a great Alien movie, for all the incredible HR Giger and weird sexual violence undertones. I'm just not sure that plot wise it earned its Alien credentials. Like the last few lines. Rain leaves a log, as she's the last survivor of her ship. But there's no passenger log. It was never an authorised mission. Its a pointless message to leave. It gives the audience closure because it flashes us back to the end of Alien, but it makes no sense as closure for Rain. That's where I'm at.

[gritsandbrits]

My late night thoughts on TF ONE

‼️HEAVY SPOILERS BELOW ‼️

- Elita didnt die HELL YEAH i am so glad we are moving away from ignoring and fridging her

- Bee is actually bearable here, and knows when to take things seriously

- wow i think even animated sentinel would be disgusted with his counterpart cuz even he wouldn't resort to murder & stealing t-cogs

- megatrons turn felt a little rushed but he was still pretty cool

- i think optimus could use a lesson on how his brashness effects others

- JAZZ LIVES

- the joke over starscream's damaged vocals sounding 'ridiculous' is ableist

- the few times we see the quintessons are scary as hell! They're like a juiced up alien version of a drug cartel

- SENTINEL and Airachnid dynamic is basically adam and lute but good

- soundwave voice threw me off im so used to it sounding melodic

- i think optimus and megatron should've spent time with sentinel like they go to his "luxury" hospital or smthn, & they start seeing cracks in the facade, it makes them learning aboht his true nature a total gut punch

- Badassitron

- the music and visuals 5000/10 Will See again

- like they get pre Great War cybertron down PERFECTLY and the shifting landscape is *chefs kiss* MAGNIFICO

- like sentinel really is whay Magnifico could be as a competent villain and Airachnid is Evil!Amaya but she's the grunt and he's the macbeth (usually its the evil woman who is the thinker while the man is the violent one). She doesn't even betray him - i really expected her to be secretly plotting against him because this is AIRACHNID we're talking about but no she 100% sticks by him the whole time and she's not annoying bitch Pick me like discount Amity.

- basically its the same plot of WISH but with MUCH better writing, i know i said i gotten sick of seeing wish dragged through the dirt but even i can't deny TF ONE did a better job

- speaking of Megatron actually faces consequences for betrayal instead of that jackass Simon who was too easily forgiven

- the faces grew on me

- finally a transformers movie with a compelling plot without annoying white people im so happy

- also they put PEPPA PIG of all characters in the Hasbro logo and not MLP... the hell? This makes me confused on the state of MLP as a whole like does hasbro just not care for the brand anymore?

- the visuals the VISUALS i dont want a 2d animation fanbrat to come at this movie ILM blew it out of the park once again!

- somewhere a guro lover has died and went to heaven

- because oh my god they did not cut away at sentinel being torn in half at megs' hands.

- CLOSE UP. ON THE SCREEN. IN SLOW MOTION. I HAD TO COVER MY EYES BECAUSE I WAS SO FREAKED OUT!

- the trailers implied he was going to be murked by quintessons but his actual death is worse. So much worse... i wouldn't even wish it on Adam Hazbin.

- So glad they didn't make elita just the GIRLBOSS™, she was genuinely frustrated with the caste system that hindered her growth. she's what a girlboss should be, not a mindless bully. Lute could take some notes from her.

Lute: will you please stop?!

Me: hey im not the one so boy crazy i ended up getting jealous of a lesbian

Seth: ouch

Evan: Miss Lute why did you let Grits eat you up like that 🤭

- orion is essentially asha but the writers trusting him enough to carry the movie. I still like her but you can tell the crew didn't have much faith in her - which SUCKS!

- ooh starscream is a little kinky

- i didnt stay for the post credits scene because i had to leave to go to work right after, but whatever it was, i bet it was AWESOME

- i think movie 2 will focus on the great war and movie 3 would have the 2 factions united to stop the quintessons

- so happy they didnt try to shove in beast wars too, like i hope we get separate beast wars media

- alpha trion is so awesome, for the amount of screentime he ate every second of it! Kudos to Laurence Fishburne

- man... this sentinel is the logical conclusion to TFA!Sentinel if he doesn't stop being an asshole

- the celebrity VAs are good, really good they sound like their having so much fun and not phoning it in

- they gave bee his stingers love it!!

- the race scene was a feast for the eyes with plenty of laughs to go along with it!

- it's sad seeing megatronus being a genuine hero only to have his legacy tarnished now that Evil!Megs has his t-cog. No matter what side he's one he will always be known as The Fallen

- here you go Animation Twitter! you finally got your Unambiguously, Unrepentant, Enjoys Being Evil Villain! now can you PLEASE stop whining?

- the dynamic had such a genuine bond and i think megatron and elita are a flip of each other theyre both angry but elita learns to put it to good use and not let herself be blinded by it while megs is consumed by his

- orion and megs are actual friends, we see them laugh and hang out together. Whether you ship them or not this is a really good display of MegOp. Hell

- see you CAN make optimus a bookworm without turning him into a cop or librarian!

- love how playful orion is at the beginning he reminds me of animated with bits of cheetor

- the textures on the bots are so neat, you can tell sentinel never been in real combat because he's all shiny and stuff while everyone else has dents and scrapes

- the themes are handled a lot better than i expected, how optimus knew they have to fight sentinel but can't execute him either. How the wealthy would keep the disenfranchised down just to keep their place in society, the limits of idealism vs. Extremism, and blindly trusting your leaders

- also how we CAN choose who we want to be but that wont always work if you live in a system designed to fail you on purpose

- genuinely smart move to use airachnid's memories to expose sentinel's crimes

- the decepticons are genuinely fighting against sentinel but its also made clear most of them are just fighting for the sake of fighting. I hope they get more characteristics in later media

- megatron does raise good points but because of sentinel, Je thinks ALL primes are inherently evil when they were BETRAYED. HE EVEN SPOKE TO A PRIME! ALPHA TRION SHOWED HIM FOOTAGE OF WHAT REALLY HAPPENED, ARE U STUPID?!

- we agree this is better than anything out of bayverse right? It is also BETTER than the 86 movie because we actually get to KNOW the characters and the film strikes a healthy balance between light and darkness. Also the only deaths are the ones that matter.

- like finally another modern kids movie thats allowed to be DARK and not entirely sanitized for stockholders

- as for what i ate i had chicken strips and an icee; i combined cherry and Wild apple flavor it tasted alright. I should've snuck in a Chipotle burrito lmao

And that concludes my very messy, grammatically incorrect thoughts the greatest Transformers movie ever made! Go see it! Pay for it, theatre hop, pirate i don't care!

[leo-fie]

Is Furiosa another Fury Road? (Guide of autistic folk)

Yes and no!

Furiosa has a different structure. Rather than a relentless chase for most of the movie, it's an episodic narrative over about 15 years. So it's not getting your heart pumping constantly with barely any breathers in between. It has actual plot. And dialogue.

That's not to say that Fury Road is lacking in any way. Rather the fact that it's basically a silent film with barely any plot, but loads of story, is it's greatest strength.

Visually it’s very similar. I don’t know if the filmmakers reused the cars they build for Fury Road or if they rebuild them, but there are several vehicles we already know. I don’t doubt for a second that most of the stuff we see on screen is practical. It has a similar feel of realness than Fury Road. Almost, more on that later.

Because we know where Furiosa ends up and the filmmakers know we know, they expect us to have watched Fury Road (or the many dissections of it, like by Innuendo Studios) recently. Fury Road is the Tankobon, Furiosa is the Databook.

Yes, we get more information about basically every aspect of the wasteland. We see more of the Citadel, we see the Bulletfarm and Gastown. We learn more about the inner workings of Immortan Joe's system. Sadly we do not see how our beloved War Rig gets build. But it's predecessor.

Furiosa expects the audience to pay close attention. The setting and pay-off, the flow of the action, the faces of characters, everything shown will come back in some way. That is of course just basic film craft, but even the simple things are nice if they are done well. I only saw Furiosa once so far, but I’m fairly certain repeat viewings will only reveal more nice setings and pay-offs, instead of plot holes.

Now to the feel. Because I’m not used to seeing movies on the big screen, it’s possible that the following is just me. But I thought the visual style of Furiosa leaned more into the hyper-real, almost mythical or into magical realism. Of course Fury Road already had the colour grade cranked up to where the sand was orange and fire was blood red. But it still felt incredibly real and tactile. Which is what set it apart back then from the shiny CGI of superhero movies. There were still weird elements in Fury Road, Max’s indestructibility, the sudden sandstorm with a lightning tornado in it, etc. But Furiosa in its visuals leans in a little bit more.

Could be because the story is canonically told to us by the History Man. Could be that the sweeping vistas of various locations are more clearly computer generated due to the sheer scale. Could be the camera work. Could be that we spend a lot more time in the actual fortresses of the wasteland, rather than just the War Rig, which we know to be a real object. Could be me.

I’m not saying it’s bad, I’m saying it’s different. The shot in the trailer, of young Furiosa picking a peach, that feeling is what I’m talking about.

Also the music. Tom Holkenborg returns for the music, but there is very little of it. I didn’t really pay attention much, but the massive Fury Road score is missing almost completely. Or I didn’t notice. I’m not a music person.

Anyway: Go watch it in the cinema, if you’re able. It’s an incredibly well made action blockbuster that takes full advantage of decades of lore. It’s firing on all cylinders. It explains the world of Fury Road more, but doesn’t get dry or takes away the intrigue. All the actors showed up for it. Anya Taylor-Joy is great, we all know that. Chris Hemsworth gives Dementus so much personality and gravitas that I only now realize he would have ended as a Joker-clone with another actor. John Burke as Praetorian Jack has a couple minutes and a couple lines and he makes it count. We also have returning actors such as Nathan Jones as Rictus Erectus, Angus Sampson as Organic Mechanic, John Howard as the People Eater. Sadly Richard Carter (the Bullet Farmer) and Hugh Keays-Byrne (Immortan Joe) could not return.

[b-frank]

so long post warning but ive spent hours going through every single goncharov post and here’s a plot summary for anyone who can’t find the movie online. just focusing on the main characters and not going into the heavy dialogue moments (most of the film). feel free to add on or correct me

goncharov and his wife katya move to naples, italy after goncharovs father dies and goncharov assumes his place as head of the family. his father dies because of a bad play he made (he’s a high ranking russian mob boss) causing a different mob boss to send his hit man, ice pick joe, after him. after killing goncharovs father ice pick joe is to kill goncharov and his whole family to eliminate the gonacharovs from the russian mafia entirely.

gonacharov and his wife flee to naples to a safe house his father had prepared. ice pick joe follows them. it’s worth noting that ice pick joe kills with an ice pick because he was given a lobotomy against his will and it’s a way of taking his power back. he’s the only character in the film who seems happy, and it’s heavily implied that this is because he’s accepted that he can’t have a happy ending.

goncharov starts methodically working his way through the ranks of the italian mafia and the process is bloody. he develops a very close friendship with a man named andrea, whom goncharov nicknames andrey. andrey wears an eyepatch. that’s not actually notable but it’s for visualization purposes. we get a lot of ‘moving up the mafia ranks’ fill stuff with andrey and gonchrov. it’s obvious that they’re very close. andreys backstory is revealed that he has been working odd jobs for mob bosses because he is in debt with one of them and his fathers life is being threatened unless he pays it off. goncharov has promised to repay andreys debt but as the movie wears on it’s obvious that andrey is starting to doubt him. they have a lot of dialogue heavy scenes where they talk about the meaning of life and love and other things. they both envy the other

meanwhile katya develops a close relationship with sofia, a rich widow. katya is also getting her hands dirty, like her husband, because she is just as invested in the family. it’s arguable that she is more invested than her husband. she’s shown to be the plan-maker and go-getter in the relationship. sofia thinks she can save katya from her life of crime (total white knight complex, but it’s well done) there’s a scene at a pool party that’s incredibly sapphic and hints that sofia is in love with katya. katya is planning the murder of [guy who is obstructing goncharovs success] but when she attempts to kill him (with an ice pick no less! to frame it on ice pick joe!) sofia follows her.

[guy who is obstructing gonchrovs success] gets the upper hand and is going to kill katya and out the gonchrov to the russian mafia when sofia steps in and kills him by stabbing him in the neck. sofia and katya then clean up the murder and dispose of their bloody clothes. in the next scene they’re on the balcony of sofias manor when sofia announces she’s leaving italy in the morning and that katya should come with her. katya denies because she’s too committed to goncharov and doesn’t know who she is separate from the family. at this point we get back story that katya was taken in my the goncharovs when she was ~12 and her parents were brutally murdered. she’s says “maybe in another life, my love” and sofia kisses her cheek and leaves.

simultaneously with that plot, ice pick joe has contacted andrey and offered a ridiculous amount of money if he reveals goncharovs identity at this ball they’re all going to be at. katya is planning to murder [guy obstructing the goncharovs success] while the ball is going on. andrey betrays gonchrov with none other than the classic judas-jesus kiss on the cheek situation. he’s shown to regret this immediately and panics and tells goncharov they have to leave.

away from the ball, in the courtyard of the manor, where andrey takes goncharov “get away for a few minutes” ice pick joe appears and thanks andrey for his help. there’s a fantastic scene showing goncharovs emotions at the betrayal before ice pick joe starts attacking goncharov. (for context this scene is happening at the same time as katinyas struggle with [guy obstructing success]) while gonchrov struggles with ice pick joe andrey stands there, very conflicted, until ice pick joe gets the upper hand. at this point andrey tackles him and through the struggle gonchrov pulls out his gun and shoots. the screen cuts to black. a second shot sounds

in the next scene goncharov and katya reunite, both blood splattered and worn. katya cries into his shoulder whilst he stares detachedly at the grandfather clock in his house. previous lines of dialogue play over the scene of looking at the clock. its very movie. it’s worth mentioning that the entire movie up to this point has been cut with scenes of the clock ticking. gonchrov and katya have the Mandatory Sex Scene and throughout it it shows that they’re both thinking about sofia and andrey, respectively

through these thoughts it’s revealed that goncharov shot andrey after shooting ice pick joe and he did so out of love because he knew a worse fate would follow a man who double crossed his best friend and then double crossed the person who payed him to double cross him

the movie ends with katya and goncharov taking over the italian mafia, deeply unhappy.

**in an alternate version of the story, andrey becomes so enraged in his resentment that he attempts to murder goncharov and goncharov kills him to put him out of his misery.

**there’s also something about a boat

[reillyissof]

I just saw godzilla x kong and it was kinda eh It looked good visually esxcept some parts ill get to later but the story was kinda wonky and the characters just felt like shells. The only people I remeber from the last movie was gia and the conspiracy theorist and the mother just felt like a narrator with a physical apperance, they just kind of have her their to put on a voice and do explanations and when they have her do actual character things they try and make her sound like everything is a dramatic moment, I didnt even remeber her previously but I did remeber her kind of person exsisting. trapper was kind of cool I apreciated he was nice to the conspiracy theorist and him taking out kongs tooth was kind of a vibe. the whole time especially at the begning everything just kept jumping between parts of the story, even the title card was wonky there was now flow just starts and stops which continoued through the whole movie. godzilla had like 5 scenes even though its GODZILLA x Kong but atleast what they did with him looked cool, no way kong could knock him out like that though that was for plot conveince and funny beam moment. throught the movie it keep having this weird visual thing with location where it would do a close up on two people are things and they are close and a resonable distance and when it cuts to farther out they are standing far away from each other it was weird. when I saw the trailers I thought it was going to be megalon since hes from underground and has an underground civilization with him and it would be cool to see him especially since weve seen mothra already, not that I didnt want her to comeback I just thought that they gave her so much and made her such a minor character, she didnt even really fight in the final battle. skar kings whole thing that made him a threat was his army and control over shimo but when it comes to the final fight he brings just like 5 guys which completley gets rid of what makes him a threat, you could probally argue that he thought he was just killing kong but still. shimo was such a minor character and with the way things were phrased paced and shot it feels like there was a movie underneath but we only get the outside, at some points it felt like I was watching a youtube video rather than a movie.

tldr; movie was kinda mid but looked good for the most part. I also got 3d glasses for it which was neat.

[callmearcturus]

aw yeah lets do this

S-Tier, AKA the Legitimately Good Tier:

HAWKEYE: Maybe my favorite MCU thing I have ever watched.

+ If you let Jeremy Renner actually act and give him a script, he's fucking great. + Kate Bishop is a perfect mess and I love her, I love she's young and excitable but also takes things seriously, she feels like she's a work in progress, I love her. + MAYA. Holy shit the gravity well of this character, how her presence dictates any scene she is in. Truly stellar. + This entire miniseries is like an extended apology for Hawkeye in every other appearance. "Sorry we dropped the ball with this character so consistently, we will bring the A game here." + The importance of disability. I'm among the ppl who was upset that Hawkeye's disability was dropped, so the way it is centered over and over and over in this, how its practical, how it's funny, how it's sad, how it gives us the most devastatingly emotional scene in all of the MCU yes I am talking about the phone call scene, finally. Fucking finally. + Florence fucking Pugh and her entire charm offensive. + The car chase scene.

- The first episode is unfortunately REALLY slow. - Nah that's all I got. I love this one.

THOR: RAGNAROK

+ "Asgard isn't a place, it's a people" is maybe the most poignant message any MCU film has ever managed. + Literally the funniest movie, but also basically a repair job of character building for everyone in it. + The camerawork in this one makes me so happy. + Tom Hiddleston is given so much to do and he's there with heels on, spectacular. + The giant turret/pegging visual pun, god bless. + Cate Blanchett can kill me.

- uuuuuuuuh. It's not as good as Hawkeye. Yeah.

GOTG Vol 2

+ Sorry but I am a GOTG Truther, I really do think its the one storyline in the MCU that is allowed to get away with really fucking intense character drama because it's not considered "main line." There is a reason ppl rioted when they tried to remove Gunn, and I'm with them. + The only good thing Chris Pratt has done since Parks and Rec. + The way this storyline centers on death and grief is devastating. + Rocket Racoon is the best character in the MCU and we all know it.

- I think the initial treatment of Mantis is REALLY rough even though in the end I think it works, but that's a hell of a hump to get over.

A-TIER, AKA the Great for a MCU Flick Tier:

BLACK PANTHER

+ My biggest problem with the MCU is the creative desert of its set and costume design, the way it feels like nothing is given time to breathe in the creative process. BP is the antithesis of that. I would watch a four hour documentary just on the visual design of this movie, from the architecture to the costumes to the make-up, everything. I don't want to hear from the director or writers, I want to hear four hours of just the craftspeople talking about their work. It's monumental. + Best Villain in the MCU, bar none. + Only MCU film to move me to actual tears in the movie theatre.

- I loved this movie! For the life of me I could not tell you the plot. I understand the plot of every Mission Impossible film but I don't know the plot of this movie. - If this movie was allowed to cut, like, 20 minutes of action and replace it with more character drama, it'd be the best MCU film.

IRON MAN 3

+ The MCU Movie That Pulls Exactly Zero Punches About Being About Mental Health And PTSD Holy Shit + Rhodey and Pepper get so much to do and I like an ensemble piece so much + Shane Black is in love with RDJ and I'm so happy for him + Pepper gets to be a lil monsterfied and that's hot

- Doesn't have Sam Rockwell. - The plot is kinda fully secondary to the character work, which imo is fine, but yanno.

GOTG Vol 1

+ All the stuff I said about GOTG Vol 1

- It's not Vol 2, which benefits from having all the bedrock foundation built by this movie to spring from.

B-TIER, AKA It's Fine I Guess:

IRON MAN 1

It's good! It invented the wheel! Part of it are fucking agonizingly painful to watch in 2023 but it also has more heart than 80% of the franchise so.

IN A CAVE. WITH A BOX OF SCRAPS.

LOKI

Okay it feels shitty of me to judge this one on its technical faults bc apparently it was shot during the pandemic and that causes a lot of the issues with the camerawork, the awkward editing, and just how Weird everything was put together. But also it's REALLY stilted and awkward, which butts up against the good script and the better acting, so IDK man.

Owen Wilson is amazing. Even my mother thought the way they canonized Loki being bi was a cop-out. And the final twist pissed me off. I hope Season 2 is better.

THOR 1

I DUNNO WHAT TO TELL YOU, BUT KENNETH BRANAGH UNDERSTOOD THE ASSIGNMENT.

DR STRANGE AND THE MULTIVERSE OF MADNESS

This movie is a mess but once i figured out it was trying to be The MCU Does Gothic Horror, I was a lot more on board. It has all the flaws of the original Dr Strange and is hard to visually follow like most MCU films, but also has America Chavez, who I adore.

IRON MAN 2

It has Sam Rockwell, I don't give a fuck.

C-TIER, AKA I wish I cared but I do not 8C

DR STRANGE

I dunno I like the actual character of Strange weirdly, I like what a complete fucking asshole he is, I like his god complex and how he reacts to his disability as a surgeon. On the other hand what the fuck is Tilda Swinton doing here, this is just awful. My biggest issue with this film is that it didn't have to be this terrible but every decision made about it feels so fucking thoughtless and myopic.

WANDAVISION

yanno. i cannot even explain why i fell off this so hard. Like, this one Had Me all the way up to and including the Agatha reveal, but like the final episodes after that reveal somehow left me completely cold and uncaring. it's genuinely weird.

D-TIER, AKA Oh my god no thank you

AVENGERS

I hate the writing. Like, I haaaaate the writing. I feel like the only likeable relationship in this is Tony and Bruce, and that does not carry this movie. The quip-driven writing, the way the need for a joke supercedes naturalistic voices and dialogue making sense, it pisses me off. I hate the writing. Heartless movie.

BLACK WIDOW

oh my god i'm actively angry at this movie okay because for the first 20 minutes, I was like "wait, is this going to be a real movie," because it felt smaller, the action felt more realistic, that fight between the Widow and Yelena in the beginning felt like it could have been out of MI: Fallout, and the other fight between Natasha and Yelena in the safehouse was also good, I really thought for a few moments that this could be Good

and then it just took a hard right into The MCU Tries And Fails To Make MI: Fallout (They Even Stole The Mask Gag, What The Fuck Was That) and not only was I disappointed, I was like retroactively pissed for the 20 minutes when I had hope in my heart. If not for David Harbour's character, I would have just left in the middle of this movie.

AVENGERS: ENDGAME

Its not at bad as Infinity War! Nebula and Rocket carried this movie on their fucking backs. But what do I know, I liked Renner's mohawk of sadness.

F-Tier, AKA Fuck This Movie

INFINITY WAR

Fuck this movie with a rusted steel dildo, fuck this entire fucking movie, I despise it. The writing is so actively fucking terrible I want to fistfight whoever is responsible. I fucking hate the attempts to humanize Thanos over how sad he is about the daughter he abused and then murdered, boo fucking hoo, I hate the joylessness of the superhero combinations, I hate the quip-driven writing, I hate this movie with a burning passion. This might be one of the worst movies I have ever seen. Soulless and destitute.

[tiredgeekgirl]

trolls 3 reviewww

so i've kind of had an off and on obsession with the trolls franchise since i saw the first film in 2016 as an almost 12-year-old who thought it was going to be the worst movie ever, and then after i watched it I was very pleasantly surprised, and it became one of my favorite films at the time

like I said the obsession's been on and off and while my opinion of the first movie has changed and I don't love it nearly as much as I did before, the franchise still holds a special place in my heart and makes me very happy, and I was so excited to see the third movie after I saw the trailers for it in theaters

anyway here are my overall thoughts:

• BRANCH-CENTRIC STORYLINE!!! Branch is my favorite character in this franchise and I loved seeing a plotline focused on him and his backstory. the "singing killed my grandma" line from the first film is still very funny, but honestly this movie actually made me a little emotional with the flashbacks we got, and said flashbacks shed some light on how sad his backstory actually is

• this movie was shockingly funny, of course there was some typical potty humor and a few questionable jokes, but overall a lot of the visual gags and jokes in this film were actually pretty hilarious, especially the scenes with Bruce/Spruce's family

• one of my main reasons for loving this franchise is Branch and Poppy's relationship, and they were SO freaking cute in this film, idc I'm a hopeless romantic and I loved seeing moments of these two as a canon couple

• I literally had a new favorite character every 5 seconds, from Branch's brothers to the new villains to a lot of the little background characters, and ofc it was also super fun to see this movie bring the Bergens back, it's super weird that the second movie kind of just ignored their existence entirely when they were one of the main plot points in the first film (at least that's what I've heard, I've never actually seen trolls world tour and I do not plan on it)

• THE MUSIC!!! I'm low-key kind of obsessed with white girl music from the early 2000s, so seeing the NSYNC reference at the end made me very happy, and I also just loved all the music in general in this film, Better Place (that song's been on repeat for me for about a week now LOL)

there were a few things I didn't love, namely Tiny Diamond's role in the film, I hate him and if you had taken him out of the film entirely the plot would not have changed whatsoever. luckily he wasn't even actually in it that much and some of his lines were actually kind of funny, but even when he was being his typical annoying self he didn't take away from the plot too much, which was nice. still, he's one of the main reasons I don't want to watch the second movie. and of course, like I mentioned earlier, there's some potty humor and suggestive jokes I didn't care for, but honestly the positives way outweigh the negatives with this film.

overall, i absolutely adored this movie! as a long-time fan I think it's the best piece of trolls media we've ever gotten, and even if you hate the franchise (which I completely understand regardless of my love for it), I feel like you would still enjoy this film, even if just for the visuals and character designs. solid 9/10 movie, would definitely recommend. think I'm going to go watch it again honestly LOL

[minijenn]

Jen Tortures Herself With Every Dreamworks Animated Movie Ever: How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World

Alright it's time to out myself in front of the entire HTTYD tumblr fandom. I like this movie. A lot. Ok? Like I think its really fucking great and I will not deny that. Is it as good as the first two entries in this franchise? No, but it's still damn solid in its own right. So let's get into it.

We pick up a year after the last movie, with the arrival of another new threat to Berk, the "Night Fury killer" Grimmel the Grisley. To protect his people and their dragons, Hiccup moves the entire tribe to a new island while in search for the Hidden World, an unreachable utopia for all dragonkind. Meanwhile, Toothless is allured by the arrival of a new, mysterious female dragon, the Light Fury, which complicates matters even further as Hiccup begins to worry that he and Toothless are growing apart.

So yeah still a pretty good plot, though not as solidly cohesive as the first two. Still, I enjoy the ride here a lot; we still get a lot of great scenes of the riders fighting their foes, lots of great flying scenes (especially that one between Toothless and the Light Fury, man that scene is just gorgeous), lots of action and strangely enough, a bit more of a focus on humor here than usual? I mean it's ok, but a little strange given this is the final entry in the franchise and the stakes are supposed to be higher than ever.

Speaking of stakes, let's talk about that. Grimmel is by in large the only real new character here (aside from the Light Fury I guess, and she's fine, I don't understand the hate towards her design, I think she's cute). And he is... probably the lamest fuckin villain in this franchise, there I said it. He's just... some dude. He's nowhere near as unhinged and intimidating as Drago, nowhere near as smart or interesting or even just fun to watch as any of the villains in the HTTYD shows, he's just... idk man, a really boring villain. Certainly not what I think the "ultimate" challenge for a protagonist as well developed and interesting as Hiccup should be imo.

I know there are plenty of complains thrown around about this movie, the other riders are poorly-characterized, Grimmel is a lame villain (as I just said, I agree with that one), and of course, it's biggest controversy, it's ending. But here's my take on the ending. I think it's actually pretty bold of them to have the dragons leave? Like yes, there is a heavy sense of finality to it, but that's sort of the point. There's a massive change to the status quo, it feels like a genuine ending with little in the way of Dreamworks doing what they always fucking do in trying to bait any unecessary sequels. And then of course, there's the epilogue, which may be one of my favorite scenes in the entire franchise. I literally cannot watch it without crying, I'm such a fucking wreck for this boy and his dragon oh my god.

As usual, visually and audibly, this movie is absolutely wonderful. The animation here is especially impressive, the lighting took my breath away in some spots with just how realistic some of it looked, while still maintaining the series' usual style. The Hidden World especially, we don't see it for very long, but it is so damn pretty to look at. The music is, of course, also absolutely lovely, once again drawing on familiar themes from throughout the series to send it off one last time.

There's lots of other little things I love about this movie too, like the flashbacks to Stoick and Hiccup when Hiccup was little (I cry), any cute Hicstrid moments, especially the wedding (I cry), Toothless being an absolute mess while trying to impress the Light Fury (I die laughing), just... god, it's more How to Train Your Dragon, man, I fucking love this franchise, how the hell can I possibly hate this movie when there's still so much of what I love about the first two in here?

I do understand, this movie is flawed in some pretty big ways. And yet... it's still so beautiful all the same. I adore it, even if others don't, and I think that's ok? We can all enjoy different things and I just so happen to enjoy this. No, it's certainly not the best this series can do, and maybe the HTTYD franchise does deserve a better conclusion. But for what we got, well... I think it's pretty damn great all the same.

Overall Rating: 9/10

Verdict: How to get your dragon some rizz bc gottdamn he needs some

Previous Review (Captain Underpants: The Epic First Movie)

Next Movie (Abominable)

[ecargmura]

The Boy And The Heron Movie Review - It's Alright

Guess who got sick right after seeing this movie? ME! I know I should be resting, but I am still able to type. Nothing can stop me from writing. I was interested in watching this movie and when my brother watched it and told me “It’s alright.” It got me even more curious. Well, to be fair, my brother usually gives vague responses.

So, I went to watch the movie. How was it? It definitely was an ‘alright’ movie. Like, it’s not bad but not great—if “bad” and “amazing” were on a scale, “alright” would be smack dab in the middle. Like, it’s definitely a Miyazaki film from how it’s animated to all the imagery and tropes he uses, but at the same time, the execution is like a roller coaster going down. It’s not Miyazaki’s best film, but one of his most ambitious creations. Though, I do think that the title is misleading as “The Boy And The Heron” feels like a literal title, but the story is more about the boy, Mahito, rather than both the heron and him, so I think that the title should’ve been “How Do You Live?” because that is ultimately the true message of the story.

I love that if you watch the film, you can see that Miyazaki made it. From the classic Ghibli running animation to the beautiful scenery, you can tell Miyazaki worked on this film, but it’s also an improvement from his previous creations. My favorite little details are how Miyazaki animates clothes. The clothes flutters well and the way they move around is really good. The scenery is a step up in classic Miyazaki as the fantasy aspect of this film is like Miyazaki going from Lv. 90 to Lv. 100 in terms of artistic game. I also especially love the way Mahito creates the bow from bamboo and other material. Just seeing him creating all of it and seeing the actual process was a pure visual banquet.

The story’s plot isn’t concrete, but it’s something that one has to think about. I quite liked the overall story as I do like something that I have to think about rather than being fed a plot and expect something out of it. The story takes place post-WWII in Japan as Mahito loses his mother to a hospital fire. Three years later, he and his father move to the countryside where he meets Natsuko, his new stepmother (and his aunt—she’s his late mother’s younger sister) and lives in a house where there are many elderly housekeepers. Mahito is still grieving over the loss of his mother that he rejects the company of Natsuko and the grannies and mainly just keeps to himself. He does meet a talking grey heron and later embarks on a journey inside a magical abandoned tower where Natsuko has been spirited away to in order to rescue her.

The story kind of started off slow in the beginning, which is where the reality portions were. It’s mainly to build up Mahito and how he copes with his mother’s death and how he was thrown into this sudden change in environment from getting a new mother to not being able to fit in school to the point that he hits himself with a rock to avoid going back. There’s also him trying to fend off the heron as he finds it an annoyance. Once the story has it so that Mahito is forced to go to the fantasy world inside the tower to save the spirited away Natsuko, the pacing goes by really fast. One moment Mahito is on a boat with Kiriko, then he’s with Himi in her house, then he’s with Granduncle and then with parakeets. I think the fast pacing is meant to show how different and magical it is compared to the slower, mundane aspects of reality.

As a protagonist, I think Mahito is a good one; while he isn’t Ghibli’s best protagonist, he is written in a way that fits the vibes and messages of the story. My favorite aspect of Mahito as a character is that he’s intelligent. He’s able to create weapons from materials around his house like a bow made of bamboo and an arrow made from the heron’s feathers that he glued together with sticky rice. He’s also quietly chaotic. Like, in usual Ghibli films, the protagonist would befriend the deuteragonist after the second meeting, but Mahito was in full killing mode—he wanted that heron GONE. The heron as a character is quite interesting. He’s not a villain, but he’s clearly not an antagonist either. His actions were mainly due to being ordered by the Granduncle. The heron feels mainly like comic relief, mainly towards the second half of the film where his importance gets snuffed after he gets his beak fixed. Though, I always did wonder why the heron was the only bird that turns human while the other birds were personified caricatures.

The supporting cast was decent. Shoichi was a rather good dad in terms of how Japanese media usually treats father characters as either incompetent or bumbling; Shoichi cares a lot for Mahito, but he’s also someone who a bit self-centered as he flaunts off his wealth and never really asks for Mahito’s opinions on getting a new mother. Kiriko definitely stood out as the tough woman and the first of Mahito’s friends in the fantasy world. She’s the younger version of one of the housekeepers, as noted by the patterns on her kimono. Himi was cute and I loved that she’s a representation of accepting her life how it is. While Natsuko did serve as a point of conflict between her and Mahito, I do wonder why she was able to leave the delivery room, when it was taboo for people to enter. The Granduncle does seem like he’s an allusion to Miyazaki himself in that he’s seeking a successor to his world, so he sought out either the baby inside Natsuko or Mahito himself. The granduncle is someone looking for a pure world free of malice, but that is impossible. Even Mahito, as pure as he seems, isn’t free from malice as his actions, the one that caused him a scar on his temple, was out of malice. I think this was a good symbolism that the world can never really be a place where it’s only just purity. Purity and malice coincide like light and darkness. The way the world collapses is Granduncle accepting that reality and that he just lets Mahito go back to his world to live how he wants to live.

I’m convinced Miyazaki has a vendetta towards birds in this film as they are very vicious, but when I think about it deeper, birds are fitting animals for this film. A lot of Miyazaki’s films has flight as one of his staple tropes in animation. He really likes flying and having birds as the main creatures for this film encompasses this very well. The warawaras, the cute white blobs are also creatures of flight, so it definitely incorporates his fondness for flight.

The soundtrack was pure Joe Hisashi magic. I loved every song in the film. There’s just something so magical about Hisashi’s scores. Hot take: I would react more emotionally if news of Hisashi’s retirement comes out than news about Miyazaki’s retirement.

I watched the film in Japanese with English subtitles. While I heard the English dub is good with the amazing casting, I think that there’s still something about watching a Ghibli film in its original language—The Boy and The Heron is actually the first time I watched a Ghibili movie in Japanese—that makes the experience feel a bit more…magical? Given that the characters and setting are in Japan, so hearing the characters in their original language does feel like I’m watching a foreign film. I think the casting is perfect to the point that I can’t find any fault with the vocal performances.

Anyways, if this is Miyazaki’s swan song of a film, it’s actually a good way for him to end after years of bringing magic into the world. Personally, it’s not the best film he has produced, but it’s a project good enough as a closure to all of his success throughout the years. Will he make another film before his death? I don’t know but if he doesn’t, then this film is still a good way to end his film career. Would I recommend you to watch it? I’d say that it’s good for a first time watch, but it doesn’t really garner a second time watch for me. What are your thoughts about this movie if you have seen it?

[maryellencarter]

Here it is, folks -- the last time Tamayama gets to take emotional center stage in the 2014 movie, almost 50 minutes before the end of the runtime. This isn't the last post I'll be making, but he's basically eye candy for the rest of the few moments he gets.

Asshole doppelganger Michael is back, because the plot imagines that he's a thief on Lupin's level and that they have to work together to succeed. (We never see him do any actual thief work or provide any value to the heist whatsoever.) Michael's bodyguard murdered Jigen's previous employer, who was also Lupin's mentor, and Jigen joined up with Lupin to get revenge on Michael and co. They've been hunting him for like a year now.

However, Michael and Lupin both just found out some plotty crap that boils down to "oopsie Michael is retroactively blameless and we hate some other guy now" (seriously, I could waste a lot more words on it but it wouldn't make any more sense), and also "oopsie the guy who actually killed Jigen's boss was working for the new guy we hate now all along". So before we all turn into besties and erase all the bad blood, Jigen does at least get to do one piece of An Drama.

I'm not sure how well this translates visually, especially in screenshots, so here we go. Jigen is working on gun maintenance when Michael walks in. Everybody sort of... freezes, Michael is like "yeah I did a bad but I'mma take down the new bad guy with you, don't kick my ass till afters". (He dies taking down the new bad guy, of course. It's a whole thing. We're supposed to care.) Jigen walks up to him and goes "are you all seriously gonna trust this guy?" and puts his Magnum in Michael's face -- Tamayama is just amazing at this super subtle grief and intensity.

Michael does this gesture I didn't screencap, which would probably be very affecting if I gave one single shit about him, where he puts his hand up to the Magnum and presses the muzzle against his forehead repentantly. (People keep putting their *hands* on her in this movie, I swear to god, what is up with that.) And then once Michael's hand is out of the way, Lupin fucking shoots the Magnum out of Jigen's hand, because nobody here has any goddamn respect!

Jigen, in one of the most commanding moments of screen presence Tamayama gets the opportunity to have in this entire shitshow, just slowly lowers his hand (Lupin follows Jigen's empty gun hand all the way down with the Walther, which would be an amazing bit of characterization in a movie that cared about the relationships among the main five), then takes his other hand out of his pocket, raises it, and does the little "you know it wouldn't have fired without these" gesture of dropping the bullets on the floor. Because something something forgiveness blah blah fuck you.

Then he just turns away -- he barely ever gets to hide his eyes with his hat in this movie, but when he does, he fucking uses it -- and stands there, sulking, while Lupin welcomes Michael into the polycule-that-isn't.

[tamelee]

Hey tamelee! :) first of all, I LOVE your blog. Your art is amazing and so are your Naruto analysis. Thank you for sharing all of this with us! :)

Now on to my question. I've just read your answer to the ask regarding the ending of Naruto, where you talked about the slow pacing and bad writing of the anime and so on.

What do you think how the manga (or Naruto in general) could have ended if there hadn't been a need to introduce Kaguya and everything that comes with her? Or maybe, what would you have wished for? I'd really like to hear your thoughts on this :)

Hi @shileyn-nea ! 💕

Thankyou so much for your kind words and encouragement!! 🥰 It makes doing what I love even better 🧡! Oh yes, the Anime is something else.. Now, I personally don't know how much truth there is to this but even my friend from Japan acknowledged it and said the fandom talked about it on a forum so take it how you will- After 'Naruto' the story ended Kishimoto wanted one last movie that showed Naruto becoming Hokage and it would've been around the age Minato became Hokage. In our case, that would've been instead of 'the Last; Hinata's Genjutsu Fest'. Again, I don't know if Kishimoto really said this, but it would make perfect sense as... it was Naruto's biggest dream (on the surface, but still) which was never fully realized. But we did get a cold bucket thrown over our heads in some random last chapter and in the end his dream was crushed still because it was visualized as something Naruto never got to celebrate nor was he shown to be excited about becoming Hokage regardless. And lemme tell you.. that says a whole lot of somethings 👀.. It is just terrible overall. But imagine.. 699 Chapters and then having a movie based on a new Chapter 700 where Naruto is a bit older and we get to see him genuinely become Hokage and something changed within the Shinobi system. It doesn't have to be something major, we only need a hint as it will be a lifelong journey anyway. Sasuke is there of course, because nothing keeps him from staying away now, there is actual meaning to their characters, they cooperate freely as we see him finding some answer to his question (or multiple) he still had. (During Vote2.) It is some sort of middle ground between Naruto wanting all the villages working together and Sasuke's revolution, but they do it together. They aren't alone and don't display these insane visuals of their loneliness BECAUSE THEY ARE STILL LONELY TODAY in their current situations. But working together like that? That is a vision they share. And we get an entire movie about it!! I don't think Naruto was ready at all to be Hokage at the end of the story, unlike Gaara who was very young as well but now he was.. what? 30+? Why...? And what did he do in the meantime instead of counting headbands? We never got to see :/ I'm so bitter about it. I don't mind Kaguya's will being a part of the war, but Madara being nerfed like that was lame. We already had the plot twist during Obito, we didn't need it again with Madara... I wish to see all 'Naruto' sequels, fillers and novels gone and forgotten, for Kishimoto to say 'Naruto' is still ongoing, say that Chapter 700 was fake so that he can make a new one and then we get a proper movie. I know he liked the 'Boruto' movie and considered it his own personal project, it was alright, but sacrifices are needed. And then! We could've also had a blank period Gaiden Manga from the man himself. But alas...

[kimdokjas]

hey! so i want to read orv after seeing you post about it for a bit but im not sure where i should start- i was hoping you could tell me how you got into it ??? anyway hope you're having a good day:)

hi omg yes of course!! legit SO excited to help spread the orv agenda, prepare to have your brain chemistry permanently altered by it fr (not clickbait)

orv stands for omniscient reader's viewpoint and it's first and foremost a webnovel, but there's also a currently ongoing manhwa adaptation (also there's a live-action movie in pre-production so you're joining the orv train at the perfect time actually)

not to oversell it but the novel is, no joke, the best piece of fiction i've read in my entire life. because of its heavy metanarrative elements, orv really is meant to be read as a novel—it's literally a love letter to its readers.

HOWEVER, i actually highly recommend starting out with the manhwa first, which is how i got into it! i feel like the manhwa is more engaging at the beginning and helps you visualize the characters and setting better. once you get a good grasp on the cast and the overall gist of the plot, you can always switch to the novel!

i personally made the switch after ep 98 of the manhwa and i'd suggest doing the same bc it just hits a lot harder in the novel at that point (plus the manhwa takes away some of the internal narration that literally recontextualizes that whole arc but i digress)

as for where you can read it:

you can find the manhwa on webtoon here (there's also an app if you prefer reading on mobile)

and you can find the novel here

(btw i fully rec starting the novel from the beginning once you make the switch! it might seem a bit repetitive at first, but you actually pick up on a lot of foreshadowing during the second read + you get to see some scenes that were changed / removed in the manhwa!)

beyond that i'll just say that the story only keeps getting better, trust me. it's probably the only one i've read where it just builds and builds and never stops and the payoff during the epilogue is 10000% worth the ride <3

hope you're having a lovely day as well!! and i really hope you enjoy the absolute insanity that is orv hehe

[slooshee]

I WATCHED THE FNAF MOVIE!!! SPOILERS AHEAD!! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!

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Alright time for my honest thoughts on the fnaf movie? Honestly..? I enjoyed it, I think some of the problems I have with a lot of newer fnaf games/media shine through but overall I think it was a solid movie. There’s some things I would’ve done differently personally but it wasn’t bad. I’m okay with it being our fnaf movie. I have a few things as a diehard fnaf fan since the first game that I am a little salty or upset about, but it’s not really the movie’s fault. It’s kinda just how fnaf is nowadays. Some for the better, some for the worst. So some pros (in my opinion. Keep that in mind and if you did really enjoy it that’s great! Like I said it’s a pretty solid movie I just have a frustrations with it or questions about it).

Pros!

I really liked all the characters I think the writing was pretty strong for the most part! A few parts were a little shaky but for the most part I really liked all the characters we got. I liked the characterization of the animatronics especially. I know a lot of people are complaining about “the pillow fort scene” but I actually liked how they did that. I can understand where are coming from with that (i could admittedly see how for some people it takes away from the horror aspect for later scenes) but I like that they gave the animatronics childlike behavior and made them a little sympathetic. I thought it was really cute. I get where people are coming from with that but tbh I think fnaf fans villainize the dead kids WAY too much. So it was nice to have them acknowledge them being kids and acting like that.

The visuals and set were GORGEOUS!!! This cinematically had some really strong scenes and I could gush about the practical effects for hours. The animatronics looked beautiful and I have almost no complaints visually about it. I also liked some of the YouTube cameos and how they weren’t too in your face. The only one I found kind of immersion breaking was matpat’s to be honest. Just cause his line felt kind of forced but it was a quick cameo so I can forgive that. Truthfully I didn’t even realize it was him till he said that so.

William fucking Afton bro.. Oh my god when I tell you Matthew Lillard absolutely ate this role up.. like my god. I knew he was gonna be good but he was absolutely iconic. He’s probably one of my favorite depictions of William Afton to date. His delivery, his mannerisms. It was (chef’s kiss). The springlock suit (WHICH ILL BE SO FR I DID NOT THINK THEY WERE GOING TO PUT THE SPRINGLOCK SUIT IN THE MOVIE MY JAW DROPPED WHEN THAT HAPPENED) scene is probably one of my favorites in the movie. When Cassidy(?) watches him just like dying and closes the door on him. Chills. I though that whole part was really well done. I wish the springlock sounds were a little louder but regardless I think they found a way to capture the horror of the springlocks while not making it too intense. Some people will find that as a con but I personally think it’s a pro because I would say this movie is a general audience film. There’s some very disturbing or unsettling parts but I think this is actually somewhat of a good gateway to horror film for younger audiences.

As goofy and kinda dumb as the cupcake looked at times I honestly love that he got so much screen time. I love that guy. Cupcake is underrated even if a bit silly.

I lost my shit when the FNAF 1 song played at the credits. I was SO excited. I’m really happy for TLT that his music got up on the big screen too. I cant imagine how cool that is.

Now for in my opinion what the cons are:

My biggest issue with this movie is the plot. And I know a lot of people are going to say “it’s a different timeline!” Or “it’s based on the books”. I would have no problem with that except for the fact that we still know nothing about the Afton family after all these years. I was really hoping (although I was aware it was going to be a different storyline) they would’ve kept Abby, Michael, and Garett Aftons. Because even if I just isolate the movie itself from the games, it just makes more sense. The way William acts when he first reads Mike’s name, The fact William would’ve had to gone out of his way to go to Nebraska and specifically target Garett. The film takes place in Minnesota, the pizzeria is there. Why is William Afton in Nebraska? It doesn’t make sense. Now, the only OTHER explanation I can think of for this is that Michael, Abby, and Garret are Emilys or the movie’s Emily equivalents. Even though I have some problems with this I will say I don’t entirely hate Vanessa being an Afton in this. It’s an interesting idea and the dynamic is alright. Truthfully I wouldn’t have a problem with any of this but this is a problem that I keep having with FNAF as a whole. FNAF keeps actively refusing to acknowledge any Afton that isn’t William (and sometimes Elizabeth in the books). And I don’t understand why? I don’t understand the aversion especially considering Michael was the protagonist for so many of the games. He is SUCH an interesting and important character and I was so deeply disappointed to find out he wasn’t an Afton in this universe because we finally had some kind of characterization of him (that I really loved tbh). I think it’s just frustrating as a longtime fan there are so many questions that go completely unanswered for no reason. Knowing things like the crying child’s name is something that has no real relevance on the plot and yet we still are refused a direct answer. I don’t mind a bit of mystery but when it’s been almost a decade and we still know nothing about half the games’ main protagonist. I have a little bit of an issue with this tbh. I wasn’t actually expecting this movie to have Mike and Abby be Aftons actually, but the way WATCHING the movie led me to start to believe that got me excited. Maybe that’s just a me problem.. Then the reveal happened and I was left kind of scratching my head. I think FNAF does that a lot, to me at least.

I also think having Vanessa be an Afton, although interesting is kind of a disservice to her character. Vanessa is a character I have found really interesting since she was first announced. I don’t have an issue with her being in this movie at all. In fact I really liked her in this movie. If you’re gonna do a different timeline thing then that’s fine. But I think it’s kind of a disservice to her to make her an Afton, I like the idea of there being another fnaf character who stands on her own. I wish in security breach they kept alot of the FNAF:AR stuff cannon that was established. I feel like they did nothing with her character in Security Breach which SUCKED because I think her whole character is so interesting and I would’ve loved to have seen more of a characterization of her in this movie. I hate this idea of making everyone related to Afton it feels lazy. The theories with Vanessa and Gregory being Aftons I really don’t like. They’re fine characters on their own, if you want to focus on Aftons then just focus on the Aftons! There’s so many questions unanswered about them that you easily could still do something with them. I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again I have no problem with Security Breach existing EXCEPT that it should be it’s own story with no relation to the old storyline. It could’ve been a really solid Sci-Fi type game especially with the DLC that came out. Afton shouldn’t be there.

I keep talking about this problem with ‘modern day fnaf’ so what is it? What is the problem that affects even this movie? Well I’ll tell you, FNAF constantly changes. Things are things added to the lore making it more confusing and convoluted (which to be fair has been a problem wayyy before SB even with some of my favorite titles in the series), and imo it makes it almost impossible for new fans to join. As an older fan who is fairly active indulging in FNAF I can barely can keep up. I know a lot of people like the convoluted and insane lore and to some extent so do I. But it’s gotten to the point where I feel a little bit of disappointment after each game and a little after the movie. I’m okay with mystery and theorizing, in fact it’s one of my favorite parts about FNAF! But having been here for so long and I still feel like we never get any answers or we’re ALWAYS left with more answers. It gets frustrating. I don’t want everything to be answered but lately every FNAF game and piece of media has left me with more questions than answers. To the point I think it affects the main plot. I also want to say it’s very hard to keep up with everything. I don’t have the money for the books or the time to read all the books and I don’t understand the whole “it’s not canon to the game lore but we’re gonna put it in there anyways!”. I don’t know. To be honest I wouldn’t have AS much as a problem with it if it was actually separate, but even though it’s stated to be it keeps seeping into the game storyline. I don’t necessarily think it’s bad to bring something like the mimic in, but it’s kind of upsetting when I watched the movie and felt there were more references to the books than the games. I was disappointed there was no ‘hello? Hello?’ Or freddy nose honk, or just a few things that are really iconic to the game. I thought the sparky being canon thing was awesome though! That was a real treat. But I do think the silver eyes was a good idea to take inspiration from. But again I also don’t understand why they wouldn’t just make a silver eyes movie? Idk I guess it’s just frustrating having been here so long and if someone asked me to explain FNAF there’s really no way of giving a set summary. Hell, even most of the “lore” explanation videos half of it isn’t even canon or confirmed. It’s just speculation or ‘a theory’. I love this franchise a lot and I guess it’s just kind of upsetting for it to be a struggle now to understand and keep up with everything. Especially when I used to find it really fun to try and do so, and now I just feel like there’s no payoff to it. And that it’s just way too confusing and overwhelming. Maybe there never really was a payoff? Or maybe it always an issue? I mean FNAF has had like 4 different ‘endings’ and then kept going. Idk I think just.. having been waiting for this movie for 8 years and it leaving me with a somewhat similar feeling after I finished security breach, I’m a little disappointed. That being said…

I will say, overall the movie itself was a little better than i expected to be honest. Which I’m very happy about My expectations for this movie were to have a good time and have a fun campy horror flick. I pleasantly surprised in a lot of areas and most of my gripes with it are kind of just my gripes with how fnaf has been as a franchise. All my criticisms of this movie and franchise are out of love and wanting the best for this series. Seriously, this series means the world to me. Most of my really close and best friends I met through FNAF, and some of my fondest memories are FNAF related. Even if the movie and franchise aren’t perfect and I have a lot of frustrations with it, I’m glad after 8 years of hearing about this movie I finally got to see it. Kid me would be absolutely over the moon right now. A part of me is. Despite its flaws I’m really proud to see how much this franchise has grown. FNAF you’re not perfect, not even close, but you mean a lot to me. Im glad you made it to the big screen after all this time :>