#BRAIN STOPPPP
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Imagine Dazai forgot what Oda looked like.
Like, after so long without seeing him, he can no longer remember the face of his best friend.
Imagine how devastated he’d be.
He would try so so hard to remember, maybe try to draw it, anything to know what his dead friend looks like.
But he just… can’t.
He knows what color Oda’s hair was, he knows what color his skin, eyes, etc were. He knows what his facial features look like on their own.
But together? He has no idea. He can no longer recall the softness of Oda’s expression when he’d see the kids, he’d no longer remember how Oda looked with a little scruff on his chin, none of it.
I think it’d kill him inside.
Edit: I wrote a fic abt this here!
#🍁#AGHHH. WHYYYY#WHY DOES MY BRAIN COME UP WITH THIS CRAP#I CANNNNTTT#STOPPPP#SOBBING#OMG NOW IMAGINE BEAST!DAZAI SEEING ODA AFTER GETTING OG!DAZAI’S MEMORIES.#bsd#bungo stray dogs#bungou stray dogs#bungou gay dogs#bungou sd#bungo stray dogs fanfic#bungo stray dogs fandom#dazai#dazai osamu#bsd dazai#bungou stray dogs dazai#oda sakunosuke#oda#bsd odasaku#oda bsd#odasaku sakunosuke#bungo stray dogs odasaku
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I didnt join an activity that was held with everyone and he sent a video of cats at the place saying "you missed this" .......
Men will literally share a romantic song with you saying they are listening to it on loop but not know how to make one normal conversation where they listen to you rather than only speaking about themselves
#I WONT READ TOO MUCH INTO THINGSSSS#BRAIN STOPPPP#this is normal friend behavior yesyesyesyesyes#Also point to note the guy has no interest in cats!!
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#i cannot read spanish but i keep getting that fears of uranus comic on my socials and it gives me the hives#shipping saturnus/jupiturnus and hearing about that makes me so stressed i am Ignoring its existence as best as possible but the universe#keeps showing it to me 😭😭 stopppp#my brain is... under stress and i am too Hyperfixated on the characters and everything#i hate my adhd so much#i wish i could see stuff like that and Not have it ruin my mood for so long#ugh.#solarballs#literally feels like someone has torn a hole in my heart whenever i see stuff like that#ive even blocked the creator but the universe is determined to make me see it 😭 stawp#this has ruined all of my determination to write today i am Not okay 👎🏼
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would also just like to say that I obviously love alice as a character, and I very much do not think she is an inherently bad / manipulative / abusive person — which is unfortunately a take I see pop up in the tags from time to time. yes, lying to alan to get him to bright falls for therapy was wrong of her and she knows that. but I think it’s important to remember that the first game takes place after years of alan being a depressed, self-destructive, and occasionally violent (not with alice of course but still) addict. that doesn’t make what she did right, but she’s human and flawed and was very likely at the end of her rope. the bright falls ballad section of herald of darkness flat out says that alice was drowning under the weight of alan’s worst traits and if he’d noticed and addressed it himself maybe this never would’ve happened. the song also says the trip was the last shot at saving their marriage. things were bad! and I think it’s deeply unfair to pin all of it on her like she was some evil uncaring wife who just wanted to institutionalize him and be done with it. and honestly I think it’s also a bad read to assume that she didn’t try to get him help in less direct ways before that, which he probably refused?
similarly, I have to assume she tried other things before the “make him think I’m dead so he hits rock bottom and finally accepts the worst of himself” plan. there’s six years between when the hauntings start and when alice jumps into the lake. you really think she didn’t exhaust all other ideas before that? based on barry’s emails she jumps sometime in the spring of 2023 and the game takes place in september. so again that’s a couple months of attempts before we see the game loop, and considering dark place time isn’t real that’s gods know how many loops of trial and error before we get to these ones that finally work. I don’t think there’s any reason to believe that the fakeout suicide was her first and only method of guiding alan.
I could write an essay about the “voyeuristic and manipulative” (ty sam lake for using the words I’ve been using lol) nature of alice’s role in the story and how it reflects the very nature of her artistic medium itself. and I do think there’s an element of her being desensitized to the Horrors a bit and she’s definitely tunnel visioned trying to get this right. but again, this is last ditch desperation at play. she’s navigating these horrible life situations and literal nightmare scenarios as best she can while trying to drag alan out of his hole at the same time. and while her handling of it all might not be perfect she is a haunted woman with problems of her own who is simply trying her best!!
#ᴏᴜᴛ ᴏғ ғɪʟᴍ#I would also love to talk about how alan finally understanding and owning up to how much he’s hurt alice was ultimately the thing#that finally allows him to progress#he acknowledges how shitty he was in other games but it’s very. downplayed? I feel?#like he talks about being a better person now in AWAN but it’s such a brush off I’m better now and I can prove it to her! vibe#rather than actually owning up to how much he’s hurt her#and then even that fake alice recording in the aw1 dlc where she’s tearing into him — it’s obviously overblown by the dark place but it’s#also probably not entirely inaccurate to her uglier feelings. and he’s just like GASP she would never feel this way lol#truly is just the alan wake get your head out of your ass trilogy smh#also also I need to wax poetic about the whole suicide thing at some point#because from the reality side she didn’t know that alan needed to believe that story and yet she still framed it as a suicide to the public#interesting to me#sorry I’m tag ranting and brain rotting so hard about alice again but I can’t stopppp
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ooooooh. I feel. bad
#like physically. brains ok for once#whatever the fuck kind of fruit punch they got at work today. they need to never buy it again hoooooly shit#thats rhe only thing i can think of thatd make my ribcage feel like its made of bees#but fr im. buzzing. id like it to stopppp#txt
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HOLD THE FUCKIN PHONE WIAT A DAMN MINUTE-
I just read the mommy kink gaz and DAMNNNNNN🤭🥰😭😩😳
holy hell, I love you. I also have like the odd urge to praise the living fucking hell out of you for creating a masterpiece like that.
oh babe u got me blushinnn 🥹🫶🏼
but rahhhh thank you so so much for loving the gaz drabble!! i read anon’s ask and went absolutely feral—foaming at the mouth and jumping from one wall to the other, and all!!
i enjoyed it too much ohhh my goddddd the way gaz is so desperate and so, so needy. and the way his shame kicked in so fast only to have reader’s acceptance (before praises!!!) send him to his euphoric release-
:(((
it was sooooo hot fr. had me giggling and squealing!! like ive always thought about gaz being a gentle dom, but the quick switch had me salivating. he is our sweet boy for real
and awww u are too sweet omgg <333 i love you too!!! big smoochies to u teehee mwah mwah mwah!!
#anon#ask#u got me twirling my hair n everything stopppp <33#but GAHHH gaz w mommy kink (AND ISSUES) wowowowoeieiei#my brain did a ‘thuck’
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Dawg how many AU ideas do you have at this point? I mean I like every single one of them but DANG 😭
Too many.
#purple.txt [👾]#I HATE MY FUCKASS BRAIN CONJURING UP THESE AU IDEAS#LIKE COME ON STOPPPP I HAVE TOO MUCH STUFF TO DRAW ANYWAYS IM GONNAC RY
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OK I don't know comics history someone fill me in. Wtf happened around Excalibur #19 why did the art suddenly get so ugly and the writing so viscerally misogynistic.
#everyone looks awful and acts worse#they brought back the stupid meggan/brain/kurt stuff when i thought we were finally past it#everyone is acting insufferable#like every single female side character we've encountered for the past 5 issues has been an incel stereotype#can we stopppp i was having fun#nightcrawler#excalibur#comics#we dont even have new writers its still lee and claremonte so. what the fuck
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becauseeee HIP KISSES are fogging my mind rn! (and all I can think of doing this rn is Miguel!...AND Kyojuro!) 🥺🥺😭❤️💕💞
His large, warm hands travel along the midst of your upper waist, knees subtly planted onto the floor as his lush, full torrid lips press into the soften fat of your plush/curved hips. Polished eyes that gleamed with such purity, love and adoration glimpsing up at you with such tender and enchantment. As though nothing else mattered in this cruel, unjust world.
Gazes at you as though you were the only thing in this corrupt world that mattered to him, that actually meant something so endearing and meaningful to him.
Eyes that reflected his entire affection and devotion towards you, lingering prying fingers dancing carefully along your warm, supple flesh as he basks in your silken skin with loving, chaste kisses. Calloused palms soothing out along the smooth surface of your delicate flesh as he gradually leaves trails of consistent peppered kisses amongst your hips. Nearly pulls into you, as though wrapping himself around you in a warm, soothing embrace around your hips.
"I would shower you with everything that is my being to you, my love"
"Anything you desire, wish or dream of I will seek it, no-- I will bestow upon you"
"Your beauty has no limitations...and I wish to simply wallow in it every moment of everyday"
"Your generous, beautiful heart ever so tender and pure...I'm lucky to mend to it, to caress such a graceful, fragile treasure-- to call it my home"
#stop stop STOPPPP#I'm getting all the mushy brain worms! 😖💞#I'm in such a fluffy/mushy kind of mood and idk why! 🥺😭💕#miguel o’hara#kyojuro rengoku#kny#spiderverse
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iM GETTING TO THE REQUETS I PWOMMY i just had to read, 78 page paper for 8am tomorw..!.//
#brain fried#it also doesn’t help my second Astro class was ENTIRELY questioning our place in the universe#I wanted to throw up half way thru#STOPPPP REMINDING ME I AM INSIGNIFICANT#I drove home so dazed. Didn’t go to lab didn’t go to third class erm
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hate how my mum 100% passed hoarder shit down to me bc a large part of my brain is like "WE CANT THROW OUT OUR DEAR SWEET SIBLING EXPIRED NUTMEG! WEVE SPENT OUR ENTIRE LIFE TOGETHER" and im like girl. that is expired nutmeg we dont NEED IT that shits had its lid OPEN for many years its a HEALTH HAZARD
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For the past few weeks I’ve had the lingering feeling that I need to Stop doing something. No idea what though
#I’m kinda going insane about this lol#I tried to fix this with random things like stopping casually smoking or trying to go vegetarian but it’s not going away no matter what I do#my brain: ommgggg stopppp😩
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it's funny outlining the loyal spouse bc my brain is like "ough kabru is so ooc..." and it's like, man, yes, bc this is an extremely canon divergent AU. you have justifications for literally all of these character changes prepared. now be quiet and keep detailing the plot
#the loyal spouse#it's a good thing i'm attuned to how he is and what not#but lord is it annoying when i'm doing something on purpose#and my brain still goes 'NYX STOP NYX STOPPPP'
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Actually un-goodnight cause i have wonders about skinamarink
Is it a entity, a demon? Why are they like keeping that kid trapped in a void...why snatch up this family exactly
I was thinking that maybe someone in the family must have been involved with this creature in the past or something cause where did it come from otherwise?? Was it one of those unlucky random encounters
Poor kevin...
This movie tickled some old childhood fears i had too lmaoo
#im mostly trying to put my thoughts dkwn so i can go to sleep#lets just say i was very cery afraid of slenderman at one point of my life#so my brain did not like that!!#*down *very#anyways yea#what the heck!#skinamarink#mr skinaaaa stopppp ahah#horror#horror tw
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feel kinda bad ranting about this when there are fellow writers dealing with writer’s block but like. how is my mind coming up with all of these ideas at the same time and /actually/ writing them down. where do these ideas keep coming from and how do i make them understand i don’t have the time for them.
#i’m already working on three longfics + god knows how many os#@ girl (my brain) STOPPPP#kinda sucks that i can’t seem to be able to write following prompts anymore though#would love to participate in more fanweeks and challenges but i just#can’t get inspired enough?#i’ll be like ‘this idea would be cool’ but never get inspired enough to write it#i’m kinda stuck in the middle i guess#personal#rant#writing
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I'll read whatever you write. I do prefer fluff and angst over smut but I don't mind smut every now and then
🍪
oooh okay!! I will make sure to keep doing a mix then! the next few days will probably be quite slutty but after that I'll bring it back to an even spread lol <3
I need to try and write some angst tbh, I just worry because I don't read it that it will be very, very bad!! i am still working on that slightly angsty matty-on-a-date blurb, but I have nothing else angsty in the works.
if you have any angst ideas, I would love to hear them. You always have such good ideas, so I'm sure they would be amazing :))))
#also read whatever i write?? stopppp im giggling and kicking my feet!!!#cookie anon your ideas/prompts always blow me away#like how does your brain do it????#time to try some angst 🫡#and go back to my fav fluff <333#🍪 anon#anon!#teacher au!
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