#BARKS AT U

[heartsrevolving]

guyz i think i did smth...

[wolfnanaki]

*bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark* *bark*

[slimesaurian]

gosh I had so much fun at pride yesterday

[m1shapanda]

SLAMS ONTO FLOOR FROM CEILING AND BREAKS HOUSE AND CAUSES AN EARTHQUAKE

HIIIII

OUGHHGG EXPLODES IN YOUR FACE HIIHIHI HOW R U!!!

[1nj3ct10n]

someone send me anonymous messages n say whatever u wantttt I wanna read :3

[crumb-crumblet-s-crumbington]

wintersberg is funny to me

[mintaii]

halloween island

[glittergroovy]

(if the full rent is $2000/month but you split that with a roommate, vote $1000. This is just about what you pay)

[potato-lord-but-not]

hi hi hi girlies I’m doing a Maltober prompt list teehee

[baeshijima]

thoughts on being engaged to duke!sunday, the head of the oak family, an incredibly influential figurehead within society, the close subordinate of emperor gopher wood who brought him and his sister in and raised him like his own, and the villain who faces a tragic ending in a novel you recently finished — the very same one you just so happen to find yourself transmigrated into. he is as cunning as he is blinded, a trait which brought ruin to many in the empire, and one which ultimately brought ruin to himself at the hands of the protagonists.

as luck would have it, you became a barely mentioned side character from a marquis family, whose role was to be the villain's wife stuck in a one-sided love who, too, would get caught up in the tragedy alongside him. however, now that it's you who is stuck in this position, you're determined to try any means necessary to deter him from going down that path, all in an effort to escape your predestined doomed fate!

of course, you didn't expect it to be easy. the day of your arrival in this world was already the night before your wedding, so you had little time to prepare yourself for the nonchalance of your supposed family, how they viewed you as but a means — a tool — to boost their influence and prosperity, the dismissive mannerisms of the household servants, and the absolute beauty of a man you will be married to.

(seriously. the novel descriptions did not do him justice. he was like... like... like he was handcrafted by god himself! and not to mention his sister, robin, was the very epitome of an angel! perhaps you're destined to perish by the god-tier visuals instead...)

to say the least, the wedding ceremony went by quickly. safe to say you didn't spend the night; he was cordial and gentlemanly upon letting you know that he won't do anything until you're ready, that you can take this relationship slow, but somehow you ended up feeling a tad insulted. like, who leaves their newly wedded alone in a big cold bed as they walk out on their own? a sick bastard that's who!

well, whatever. it's not like you need nor want to consummate with him! besides, you have bigger things to worry about — things such as your impending death. and, of course, the only way to stop sunday that you can imagine working is by chipping away at his resolve bit by bit, and opening his eyes to reality.

he is a tragic character, one who cares more about the well-being of penacony and its people than anyone else, but was manipulated into getting his hands dirty in the emperor's stead. you knew this. you sobbed over his story, cursed out the protagonists, and even fought internet randos on novel forums about sunday's motivation and how,

no, he is not just a stupid villain. he is a complex character with flaws and humanity and was cruelly taken advantage of by someone he considered family. he was deceived through the suffering the emperor wanted him to see to make him easily manipulated, creating a rift between him and robin to have that prominent separation. you know what? maybe you're just a !%#@ who can't even #@?"% read properly!

and yet you still find yourself at a loss when faced with the walls he has in place. your initial efforts went as well as it possibly could have; you trying to earnestly help him, while he "kindly" dismisses your offers! well, "kindly" being more condescending since you could read between the lines of his mannerisms and amiable demeanour, but that's fine! you expected this! that just means you have to double down on your sincerity, get through to his heart (somehow), and help him realise humanity isn't as weak as he's led to believe!

you have three years until the novel's plot officially starts, and another year after that until your demise. that's plenty of time to get him to warm up to you!

it was easier said than done, but after your valiant effort and abundance of time put into this relationship, which admittedly you could do with some of that lost time back, you could give yourself a pat on the back with the progress you made! while you definitely could have done without a lot of the headaches, it's safe to say sunday has significantly warmed up to you in comparison to your wedding day. he now willingly eats all his meals with you with some real conversation, takes garden strolls with you in the early evenings, invites you out for dinner at a restaurant at least four times a week, hell he's even joked and laughed with you more frequently! but most importantly, he has begun asking for your opinion before finalising any decisions he is required to make. and he actually listens and considers your side! now, that certainly is the best outcome you could hope for after all this time, and it most definitely will help in your endeavour to save you both from the protagonists!

however, you've noticed he's been more... affectionate? well, at the very least he now willingly holds your hand when in private (not just in moments when you're in the public eye and he has to make sure the family's reputation is spotless), sometimes he will hug you out of the blue ("i just need to... recharge. you have a way of calming me down. i hope you don't mind." ...how could you say no to his supreme god-tier face card? that's just a losing battle you won't even bother fighting against.), oftentimes he opts to just gaze wordlessly at you (robin had mentioned over one of your tea times how it almost appears as though there is no one but you in the world when sunday gazes at you with, in her words, "the eyes of a man so deeply in love!" ...whatever that's supposed to mean...), but a more recent development has been his sudden interest in kissing you; well, more specifically giving you a kiss to the back of your hand or on your forehead — certainly not anywhere near the lips! (besides, he's probably just gotten comfortable with you, enough where he can freely act without judgement. nothing more, nothing less.)

well, either way, development is development! soon enough, the time for the main plot to start has arrived. it of course follows what you remember, from the organised balls to the protagonists meeting to the political aspects of it all. the only difference is sunday's less active involvement in all the schemes and the emperor's ploy. rather, he seems more focused on you and the future of your marriage and even displayed a sudden interest in your practically non-existent relationship with one of the foreign diplomats, aventurine— wait...

"[name]," he calls your name out so sweetly you nearly disregarded it as someone else he was talking to. well, perhaps you would have done had he not suddenly appeared before you, a tight-lipped smile tugging the corners of his lips as he steadily approaches you.

oh. he doesn't seem very happy, if his tense figure is anything to go by. you wonder if one of the nobles grated his nerves a little too much this time?

sunday comes to a halt a step away from you. "i don't like that... gambler being so close to you. it... it brings me a rather unpleasant feeling." there's a slight, trembling pause. not a moment later does he close the gap between you, one knee on the ground as he matches your seated height on the fountain rim, your hands gently enclosed in both of his.

you idly wonder if this is what robin meant by the so-called "eyes of a man so deeply in love" she constantly gushed about, for the way in which he gazes up at you is enough to render you breathless.

"tell me, [name]," he begins once more. there is an underlying desperation woven within his tone, one which has your head spinning and heart thumping wildly as his trembling gaze holds you in place. "tell me, what am i to do with this fervent love and overwhelming adoration i hold for you?"

oh.

...oh.

perhaps your impending doom should be the least of your concerns when you now find yourself in the arms of a clingy husband...

(though, it's safe to say you did, in fact, manage to prevent him from succumbing to his tragic fate! you just gained a loving, yet slight slightly emotionally challenged husband along the way.

well, you can help him work through it; you have the rest of your lives now to figure it out, after all.)

[obsob]

mood board for doing any sort of task

[cubbihue]

I've been reading a lot of your AU, and I was wondering if Timmy has interacted with the genie Norm? What would their interaction be like?

He has! But only once. Timmy had to release Norm to let him know that he was being sent back down to Earth, as per the Genie-Fairy Treaty.

Norm was very very annoyed to hear that his 20 years of plotting has been thrown down the drain, what with Timmy becoming a Fairy. But, hey, it just means he has all of eternity to find something to make Timmy's life worse! Or just to make him suffer.

Afterwords, Norm's lamp was thrown back to Earth for any person to find.

Bitties Series: [Start] > [Previous] > [Next]

[ew-selfish-art]

Dp x Dc AU: Jazz Fenton, after years of fixing her brother’s injuries, becomes a Doctor with an inclination towards behavioral health and psychology- In order to make the difference she wants to see in the world she joins Dr. Leslie Thompkin’s practice. 

Jazz Fenton, M.D. has spent years of her life doing research, doing the hard work and the emotional labor, and finally, finally, she’s joining a practice she can feel 100% confident in. She’s goddamn good doctor and she wants to make the biggest impact that she can. 

Dr. Thompkins (who insists that she call her Leslie as they’re colleagues now), is a kind woman, sharp as a tack and keeps her practice open at odd hours to help the most unfortunate. It took some time for them to bond and trust to be built, but now Jazz is being allotted a few night shifts here and there. 

It’s incredible. Jazz gets to spend time with the kids who come in and really talk to them (in addition to getting them antibiotics, heating pads and pokemon themed bandaids) to help equip them with a few coping skills. Her passion for psychology never disappeared after all, but the expansive knowledge of how to heal the human body has made her find a sense of fulfillment like no other.

Having proven herself and worn Leslie down, Jazz now takes up about 1/3 of all the night shifts in the month. She’s hoping to get to 50/50 by the end of the year but she’s content with what she has. Danny keeps odd hours anyway so calling him after work on her walk home can happen any time of day and he will always answer enthusiastically. 

It’s a particularly busy night before he comes in. The Red Hood. 

He was known for being an ally to Leslie, despite being on contentious terms with the Bats, but Jazz had never asked directly. Never one to turn away a patient with bullet hole wounds, she hops into action to get his wounds cleaned, sewed up and gauze wrapped. She’s handing him a sheet (an Infographic! Dani made it with her! Graphic design is her passion!) on how to care for his wounds when he first seems to recognize that she’s not Leslie. 

“No, Of course not. I’m Dr. Fenton. I can’t blame you for not remembering but I did introduce myself as you bled in the entry way. You’re Red Hood, right?” 

“Hm. Didn’t realize the practice was expanding. Where can I find-” He grumbles before pushing her hand aside from where she had still been supporting his shoulder.

“Hold on there, mister. You’re going home, you’re following this infographic and you’re going to get some sleep.” 

“Lady you don’t know-” His voice modulated ton came across antagonistically. As if he was trying to intimidate her. Ha, Jazz rolls her eyes at the inclination.

“Who I’m talking to? Who I’m dealing with? You’re hilarious. I can eat you vigilante’s hero complexes for breakfast. Tell me who I’m calling to pick you up and then you can say thank you.” Jazz snaps at him. It really had been a long night but his whole dialogue thus far is making her a bit batty. 

“Oh really Doc? You know Leslie’s tough shit, and from what I can tell you’ve got nothing on her-” 

“Trying to make me feel insufficient when I just saved your life? That’s cute. I’m sure a lifetime of abandonment by both of your parental figures gave you that. I’m also sure that you inherited this desire to prove you’re not going to be dependent on anyone who wants to help from whoever got you dressing up in tights to fight crime in the first place. Again, I’d love to talk at length about how predictable you-” 

“Bwah- wait- I’m Predictable? You’re probably some nepobaby who had parents who told her she could have the world-” But Jazz cuts him off with hysterical laughter- he couldn’t be further from the truth. Her parents loved her, but nepotism? With what, the ghosts? If anything she got that from Danny, but he doesn’t need to know about her ghostly titles. 

“You’re just some guy who came back from the dead and made his trauma everyone else’s issue. So shut it. And tell me how I’m getting you home from this clinic.” She seethes though her voice stays devastatingly level with each word. 

Speechless for a moment, he eventually relents to Jazz that he’s already called for help on the comms but it will be hours before they can come for a pick up. The sun had already come up and the night had been over for most of them before Hood had walked into trouble. She groans and the realizes the time for herself and the empty clinic around them.

“Fine. My shift just ended anyway. I’ll get you home in one piece and I swear to all the ancients that you’d better follow the directions on the infographic.” 

And that’s how Jazz ended up calling her brother while supporting the weight of a grown ass man (who no longer wanted to talk to her) on her walk home. 

The next time Red Hood appears in her clinic, he’s brought a dozen roses in addition to the cut on his neck that definitely needs to be pressurized like ASAP. Did he stop for the flowers on his way to the clinic? He’s going to pass out from blood loss! She doesn’t even like roses!

[poppy-metal]

NEED to be tashi’s innocent stepsister who Patrick’s just obsessed with whilst he’s dating her. Your sister is your whole world, Patrick can see that. You look at tashi like she hung the moon in the sky herself and if he looks too closely he can see the lust for her in your eyes, buried beneath all that admiration.

So of course he decides to be proactive about it. One night he’s staying over at your parent’s place and as the evening rolls around he fucks tashi. Like fucks her, making sure she’s gushed over his cock at least three times, making him alllll nice and wet. He waits for her to fall asleep and sneaks into your room to shove his cock in your mouth.

At first you’re a bit dubious about it, you would never want to hurt your sister but as soon as that sweet, tangy, indescribable taste hits your tongue you can’t help but go to town on his hard cock.

“You like that?” He teases you from above, jerking his hips mercilessly into your mouth “taste good?”

You gargle out something akin to an agreement before he’s bending down to groan into your ear “you better savour that shit up, that’s the taste of your sister’s pussy”

Might come off anon might not but for the time being can I pretty please be ur sweet 🐉 if it’s not taken?

🐉 when I catch you,,,,, when i catch you,,,,,

hhhhh you hate that patrick has power over you and you even more that you kinda like it - it was easier when he was just tashi's dumbfuck boyfriend you hated for stealing her attention. you were so sure you were sneaky about it, your admiration innocent in appearance - your preening under her attention just the sweetness of a younger sister. no one had to know you stole your big step!sisters panties and rubbed your pussy raw while you sniffed them. no one had to know you secretly seethed with jealousy when she regailed a story about how she fucked a girl on her strap once, no one had to know how you fucked yourself on your dildo imagining your big sister breaking open your virgin pussy on her big plastic cock - and when she got a stupid fucking boyfriend no one had to know you pressed your ear to the wall and humped your pillow to wet slapping sounds of patrick fucking her - the headboard slapping the very wall your ear rested against - her moans mixed with his animalistic grunts making your cunt gush - filled with so much jealousy, and want, and lust - you forgot to muffle your whimper when you came - that's what gave you away.

and when patrick started paying extra attention to you afterwards it made you uncomfortable. face flushing when he'd purposely tease you, bump his shoulder against yours when he plopped down next to you on the couch and leaned in way too close - the scent of his cologne and boy smell invading your nose and you told yourself you were grossed out by it, annoyed, scrunched your nose and shoved at him - his attention made you uncomfortable because it made you wet and you didn't want to have the hots for your stepsisters boyfriend when you already had the hots for her.

but when tashi would get all huffy and snap at patrick to leave you alone and threaten him you'd think you wanted patrick to bother you alot more if it meant tashi would get all protective over you like that. you loved when she got invested in you, that she vetted all the boys you went on dates with and hardly any of them impressed her - so you rarely dated at all.

you knew you could never have her though. she was too focused and driven - you doubted her and patrick were even serious - and you were in love with her. plus - you knew she was religious too, and even if she was okay with fucking around and having sex, you doubted fucking her little sister would be passable to her. she'd think you were gross and a pervert. she was perfect and was gonna be a tennis star and get married to a man someday and have a big family and be famous and you didn't fit into that. that didn't stop you from wanting though. from desiring. from being a freak.

freak enough to suck her boyfriends cock when he cornered you one night and confessed to knowing what a little pervert you were. you felt bad - you really did, this was tash's man, and she could act all tough and independent as much as she liked, but you knew she cared about patrick - he was cheating on her, technically, by propositioning you. the right thing would have been to tell her everything, despite what patrick might reveal about you - but you were far far far away from being a good girl.

you did try to resist, called patrick an asshole and a horrible person - you tried to be a good sister, but the second patrick gripped your hand and guided it to under his sweats, to his bare, sticky cock - and said - "v'got your sisters pussy all over my dick. you wanna taste her don't you, you little freak?"

you'd been helpless after that - and you'd always been naturally submissive, and yeah maybe you'd always admired how hot patrick was, but you'd never felt anything deeper about it, because it wasn't comparable to what you felt for tashi - but right then, at the moment, with him towering over you all intimidating and tall and his hair mussed from being in tashi's bed all night - you sunk to your knees for him, too easily.

let me be a bad sister in secret, you thought as you opened your mouth to receive patricks cock - if it meant it was the only way you'd ever get to taste your sisters cunt - you'd be fucking terrible.

patrick groans when you sink your mouth around him - his grip on your hair tight and hard. "lick the whole thing - fuck yeah, suck her off me -"

god, you really could taste her. a tangy saltiness on his cock that wasn't just his skin - the sticky film of what must have been her orgasm covering his thick shaft that you lapped at like a kitten, holding his cock up so you could lick the underside too- get every last remaint of her off his cock and onto your tongue - whining as you did it -

patrick reached down to grip himself for you, holding himself out of your way and pushing your head even further between his legs - "get my balls too. she was fuckin' drippin' all over them."

you'd given head before - albeit alot less enthusiastically then this - but you'd never given special attention to a man's balls. never had the desire too.

patricks balls are heavy things - he's got a fat sac, and you can see the individual balls inside the fleshy skin, like two well - balls, you suppose. or two ripe fruits. they hang from how full they are - the skin around them a little loose. they look meaty. the musk there is even more prominent too, more distinctive - he's got alot of fuzz down there and you should be disgusted - you know for a fact tashi isn't licking these balls, she'd said as much when she told you how much she hated giving head - and you'd agreed that it sucked, only for her to flick your forehead and tell you you shouldn't be sucking anyone's dick, because no one was good enough to be on your knees for -

and isn't that another thought? how angry she'd be at the fact that you're such a slut? on your knees and liking it. salivating at the smell of a man's sweaty balls inches from your face - she'd be so disappointed. your cunt throbs and you moan as you lean forward to lap at his sac.

your hand reaches between your legs as you explore his balls with your tongue - laving your tongue in circles across the silken flesh, suprised by how soft he is here, despite the hair, which you surprisingly don't mind - you're liking this alot more than you thought you ever would -

"fuck - knew you'd be such a fucking slut. open your mouth - " you do so eagerly, and he pushed your face almost entirely between his thick thighs, until your mouth is directly under his balls, "- yeah, just like that. shit, you're good at that."

he lowers his balls into your mouth and you close your lips around one of the fleshy stones - pulling and sucking it into your mouth with long swallows. like you're trying to pull it all the way into the back of your throat. you pull and suck pull and suck until he plops free from your mouth with a wet sound and he doesn't even have to ask before you're giving the same treatment to the other one - until his whole sac is wet and gleaming with your saliva and drool.

god, you feel insane - your mind is fuzzy - your nose is pressed up against the underside of his fat cock, hid knuckles bumping against the ridge of it because he's fucking jerking himself off while you gurgle on his nuts - he's disgusting and deplorable but you're not better, your tongue sneaking back to lick the underside of his sack, to his perineum, your head bobbing as you suck and suck and suck.

he just feels so warm in your mouth - squishy and full and the sensation is as fun as the taste is salty and good on your tongue - you're enjoying yourself so much that when he pulls you back you actually try to dive back in - forlorn as you stare at his dripping sac, wanting to go back, lap and lick and lave at them for hours -

you're not left wanting for long though, as she's soon feeding you the tip of his cock, and then more - your mouth stretching and splitting as he forces himself down your tight throat - "shittttt" he grunts, half hunched over you, and his palm slaps on the wall behind you, he looks down at you with the most debauched expression, pupils blown out, hair dark and wild, lips bitten red - and you feel a wash of pride that your mouth undid him that much - hate yourself for it -

he gets you all the way down, all the way to his thick base - until the thick thatch of hair at his pelvis, wirey and dark is brushing your upper lip and nose - he lets out the most pornographic moan that's so loud you actually feel a flash of panic that tashi will hear and coming barging in and see your mouth split wide around her boyfriends dick and - fuck why did that just make your clit pulse?

"she can't take me like this," he tells you - "she starts spitting up before I can even get - fuck - halfway down. but look at you - " he shakes your head a little, kind of jiggles it on his cock, moving it inside your mouth, and your throat constricts at the same time your pussy throbs and throbs and throbs - "you fuckin took that shit - oh fuck, if she knew what a little cocksucking slut her baby sister was - what d'you think? think she'd be proud?" his free hand comes down to cup your cheek, and he pushes against you so that his cock shifts in your mouth, pushes against the side of your cheek that he's cupping, his thumb strokes over your skin in faux tenderness.

you should bite his dick off - talking about tashi like that - so what if she can't deepthroat him? but you're so turned on, you can't help it. you can't even pinpoint why. you don't get off on the thought of hurting tashi - you'd rather kill yourself than upset her - and if you knew for certain if she knew about this and she'd cry over it, you'd gut patrick like a pig yourself.

but.

but then you think of her being proud - like he said. of her watching how much of her boyfriends cock you can take and being impressed.

you're not good at tennis - and that kills you - because it's tashis lifeblood - it's the very essence of her being. her one true love.

but what if this was something she could be impressed by? you'd always thought you'd only be happy with a guy if they were hand picked by tashi. almost like you wanted her to be there holding your hand with you on the dates you went on - there with you when you were kissing them - instructing them on how to do it, how to make it good for you - you never let them touch your cunt because in your head, you always knew, tashi would never approve of this guy taking my virginity.

obviously she approved of patrick enough for herself. and she did have high standards.

was this why you were letting this happen? you didn't know - you didn't want to analyze - it just felt good in the moment - so you moaned around him, and you reached into your panties and you touched your wet pussy as you let patrick zweig fuck your face in way he never would your sister's.

and when he cums, hot and pulsing on your tongue and down your throat - when he grunts - "stick out your tongue and show me", you open your mouth wide to show him you swallowed it all down. he grips your chin and his eyes shine with pleasure. an approval that sends shockwaves straight to your throbbing little clit.

he leans back, tucks his softening, wet cock back into his sweats - and you think he means to leave you - leave you to deal with all your conflicting emotions but then he scrubs a hand down his jaw. appraises you.

"you're a virgin?"

had tashi told him you were? or did it leak from your pores?

"what's it to you?" because, really. why did he care?

patrick tongues the inside of his cheek - and you hope he doesn't notice the way you squeeze your thighs together. you hate how fucking stupid hot he is. you wish tashi had gone for someone ugly, one of those "I don't know how he bagged her when she's a 10 and he's a 2" kinda situations, but no, because tashi was vain, and didn't date ugly people.

"I can fix that for you, if you want."

you stare at him. he'd said is so casually, like he was a math tutor offering to help you understand math homework better and not the guy dating your sister who he knew you wanted to fuck you -

"dude, what the fuck? you're dating my stepsister."

patrick raises an eyebrow. "didn't give a fuck about that when you were gargling my nuts just a second ago."

"you don't deserve her."

"yeah, no shit." he scoffs. straightens and shrugs like it's not big deal, though there was definitely a tinge of bitterness to that statement. he leaves your room, stopping at your doorframe to add, "just an offer. text me if you change your mind, yeah? we can work something out."

he slaps the top of your doorframe in a ridiculously boyish gesture as he leaves and you stare after him. dumbfounded.

of course you masturbate to the memory of the whole ordeal immediately after - still throbbing and horny from it all - and after you're left so empty and wanting, starting at your ceiling as your chest heaves up and down, and you can't help but think how similar you and patrick are, more than you'd thought. you both love tashi. you both kind of hate her for the power she holds over you. you're both kinda fucked up sexually, though patrick definitely has more experience than you.

and it's not like tashi is ever going to want you back - or actually be the one to take your virginity - so why not patrick? she'll break up with him soon, anyway. a fact even patrick seems to be aware of. it can just be a quick affair, a secret tryst. the closest you'll ever get to your big sister - and a way to scratch that perverted itch inside of you.

you last a week before you cave and text him.

[aphel1on]

laios has very quickly become dear to me not just because he's an autistic protagonist but because his autism is itself one of the reasons his party has an edge over others. though we see him struggle in social situations, his special interest makes him hypercompetent in the context of dungeon survival. i'm aware that's not a NEW observation on him but i was impressed that he even used his special interest to successfully solve a crisis that relied on noticing social cues- he was able to pick out the impostors bc he honed in on the small discrepancies in their attitudes toward monsters. if that isn't weaponizing your autism, i don't know what is

[tomcriuse]

Wagner Moura as Joel Civil War (2024) dir. Alex Garland