#BANG CHAN CHEATING

[hanadulsetaad]

"In the Warmth of Trust: A Promise Recalled"

BANG CHAN X READER ( Y/N) BREAKUP

TYPE: ANGST, CHEATING, INSECURITY, BREAKUP

PART 2

One year of long distance won't change anything, you thought to yourself while paying the fees for your master's course. You couldn't believe how amazing life had been lately; things with you and Channie were better than ever. You had recently gotten into your dream school in your favourite country. Before leaving Korea for a year, you felt very emotional leaving Bang Chan and your silly little gang; you would definitely miss them. But you couldn't shake the feeling that life had been too good too early, almost as if you had jinxed it yourself.

You couldn't believe what you just read: a text from your boyfriend of 6 years. "Hey, it's not working, okay? I've been meaning to break up with you for the last 3 years. Actually, I never wanted a serious relationship, and I don't even want kids or to get married." As you read the words, you thought it must be a joke. Bang Chan, the most perfect guy in the universe, would never say this. It had to be a prank. You had only been away for a month, and he was texting this? It couldn't be real, could it?

But it was true. Bang Chan and everyone in the gang had blocked you. A few friends of yours who were in a different friend circle told you about rumours that Bang Chan was hooking up with Sana. "In the Span of Two Months, Your Life Went from a Loving Relationship and Amazing Friends to Solitude in a Foreign Land, Without Friends or Channie."

You recall a conversation you had with Bang Chan a long time ago when he introduced you to Sana and everyone else. You remember how insecure you felt, and he said all those reassuring words about how his ideal type was only you. He expressed that he had never been interested in Sana or any other girls and that you were the only girl he wanted.

The memory replays vividly in your mind as you recall sitting with Bang Chan on a warm summer evening, the sound of cicadas filling the air.

You: "I don't know, Chan. I just feel a bit insecure sometimes, especially around Sana. She's so pretty and talented…"

Bang Chan: wrapping an arm around you "Hey, don't say that. You're the most beautiful and talented person I know. Sana is just a friend; you're my everything. My ideal type has always been you, Y/N. I've never been interested in anyone else."

You: smiling, feeling reassured "Really? You mean it?"

Bang Chan: nodding earnestly "Of course, I do. You're the only girl I want, Y/N. I love you."

You remember feeling a warmth spread through you, reassured by Bang Chan's words. But now, those memories feel like they belong to a different lifetime, a different person.

[baby-yongbok]

Caught up - Bang Chan Hard Thought

Content warning - infidelity, appearance by Minho[MDNI]

WC - 626

✧ Masterlist ✧

It all happened so fast. The scratching, ripping, moaning. Your legs wrapped around his waist, his warm hands hiked up your sundress, and pinned you to the closet wall. He held you up against him while he fought with his belt, button, and zipper. This is wrong. This is so terribly wrong, but when he sinks into you, when he fills you like he was made just for this moment, all of the guilt melts away with a strangled groan.

“Holy shit.” He's grunting while he ruts into you. There's already sweat beading at his hairline, you can feel it when he kisses your neck. He sucks forbidden marks into the skin, and you know you should tell him to stop. You need to tell him to stop.

“Chan, we - Chan.” Words betray you. Syllables melt into moans and your crossed eyes can't follow a single thought.

“I know, I know. I'm sorry.” His nails dig into you in a way that contradicts his apology.

His thrusts pick up, his moans ring louder in your ears and the knot in your stomach tightens so quickly that it has you wildly clenching around him. You can feel your slick dripping from you. You can hear the way that it coats him so perfectly.

“We shouldn’t.” He's speaking like he hasn't already done it. Like he hasn't already lost his sanity in his brother's girlfriend's cunt. “I just can't-”

His sentence falls off into moans as he reaches the edge. “God I wanted you so bad.”

All that you can say is his name. All that you know is the feeling of him. His lips find yours in the dark. The kiss is clumsy and rushed and so fucking good. It's everything that the both of you have dreamt of.

It felt wrong then, when you'd touch yourself to your boyfriend's brother and moan his name so loud that your neighbors could mistake Chan for your actual lover.

Chan felt no better as he'd fuck himself to the thought of you with his brother sleeping on the other side of the thin wall. He’d bite his fist and fuck his pillow with sweet whispers of your name. He always came with his eyes closed. See no evil, commit no sin.

“Baby?” Minho called for you from the hallway. You gasp at the sound and Chan buried himself so deep inside of you that you see stars.

Chan covers your mouth. His eyes stare into your wide ones as he strokes you agonizingly slow. His cock massages your g-spot to a perfection that you've never experienced. He's perfect.

You whimper from behind his hand while he fucks you slow. His bottom lip is caught between his teeth and his eyes roll back when you squeeze him. His nails are bruising against your hips, he digs in to keep his composure but you're both losing it.

It only takes one more slow & deep thrust from him to have you seeing white. Your legs tighten around his waist and you bite your tongue so hard that you could draw blood. A whine still escapes you despite your efforts, you still squirm around him and clench so wildly that he's spilling into you as you come undone.

“Babe?” Minho steps closer to the closet. His curious ears are red as he plants one to the door.

“Oh fuck, baby.” Chan grunts through clenched teeth. He can't help it. “Shit, so tight.”

Chan tips his head back as you ride out your high. He savors each clench of your dripping cunt as it milks him dry. He takes in the way that your chest rises and falls against his. He takes it all in with his eyes closed.

And then the door opens.

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[channie-binnie]

The blue team only have Chan and a dream

[chanstopher]

🐺🫧240219

[broken-glowsticks]

What Once was Mine

Chapter 10 - Make it fit

Genre: Childhood friends, Eventual Friends to Lovers, Slow Burn, Love corner/love triangle, love rivals, Series. Not all chapters will be proofread!!

Warnings: 18+, mdni, mentions of sex and alcohol consumption, additional warnings will be added to individual chapters as needed.

Additional warnings: there's some implied, almost cheating. Idk how else to put it, but it's there, and I just thought I'd let people know.

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Hyunjin dragged his brush against the canvas, smearing paint together as music blasted from his speakers. Along the walls hung numerous canvases already covered in his artwork, drenched in all his emotions.

The past few weeks, whenever he wasn't at work or being dragged from his apartment by Minho, Seungmin, and Jeongin to spend time with them, he was holde up in his spare room that he had been slowly converting into a make-shift art studio - as it had the largest window and the most ventilation. It was cathartic, spilling every thought and feeling into whatever medium he had on hand, which turned out to be quite a bit. He and Minho had bought an art class's worth of supplies when they went out, but it was well worth it.

Painting truly became a respite. He had turned dancing into his career, sucking almost every bit of relief the activity brought him, leaving only his art as a way to process the feelings that demanded to be felt.

Yes, dancing didn't mean what it used to, but at least it was still a good way to work off his sexual frustration, an exceedingly agitating sensation he's been feeling quite a lot lately. No matter what he did, no matter who he did, it was never enough, it never felt right. What the serious hell was wrong with him? He's been like this ever since you started dating “The Boyfriend”, and Hyunjin really couldn't wrap his mind around what the connection was between his upset feelings over that and his out of whack libido, if he didn't know any better it was almost like having sex with you was the only thing that could get him off.

Hyunjins brush paused on the canvas as a realization hit him. That's exactly what this was. After all, he only slept with those other girls because he could never fully have you, and as far as he knew you never wanted him as something more, so he just kept up his fuckboy habits from highschool as a way to work off all that extra need. In hindsight, that was not the best idea, downright dumb even. Other girls were only ever good for a night. None of them were you and thus couldn't last, which caused him to leave a trail of broken hearts in his wake. But he couldn't seem to stop. For him, it was a desperately needed distraction and enough to hold him over until the next time you were in his arms. Yet, now that you've essentially broken up with him, nothing was enough. What was the point in working off all that pent-up carnal desire with strangers if, in the end, you would never end up in his arms again?

Hyunjin let out a rough sigh, this really was like a break up - not that he actually knew what that felt like. In all his life, he was always the heartbreaker, never the heartbroken and to make matters worse he did this with his own two hands. Maybe he should have listened to Minho and taken the chance to confess his feelings for you, to just get them off his chest and let whatever happens, happen. Or maybe he should have been selfish and not let Changbin have you to begin with, effectively breaking your heart but leaving room for him to pick up the pieces, maybe then you'd see him as someone to love. Not as a friend but as a lover to spend the rest of your life with as easily as you spent the start of it. But he was too much of a coward, too scared to risk rejection, to risk what little intimacy was left between the two of you, too cowardly to face the reason why he never felt like you loved him to begin with.

Scoffing at himself, Hyunjin slashed his brush, splattering acrylic in an action that mirrored the agony swirling in his heart, before flinging his paintbrush across the room in an attempt to push down the disgusting feelings of filth and inadequacy that rose in his throat like bile. He loved you. He's loved you since you were children but never knew what to call the emotions that tethered him to you. He knew you were comfort and dependability, that your smile was amazing, that your laugh was a shining light in darkness, that your scent belonged to linger in his life, in his bed, on his clothes, and in his hair, but he never knew that was love and as he got older he got lost in trying to find out exactly what love was. He got so lost, in fact, that when he came to his senses, you were crying next to him in your bed, asking what you did to make yourself so unwanted. How did he lose so much time? How could he even do that to you? His most precious person.

It was that night when he found out what love was and - most important - that he was in love with you. But that was also the night he thought you could never be in love with him.

How could you? He left you, completely abandoned you, and for what? To be with other girls, sometimes even older women? Girls and women that only used him - either for sex or status, sometimes both? He did dirty things, drank too much, partied too hard, got into a few scrapes, made some enemies, nothing too severe but enough that he knew he wasn't the same innocent kid he was before your parting. At the end of it all, despite realizing he was in love with you, he came to the heart rendering realization that he doesn't know how to love - only how to fuck. How could you love someone who didn't know how to love you back? It would never be enough. And so, Hyunjin decided to give you the only thing he knew, hoping, praying that it would be enough for you to stay by his side.

It worked for a while, it gave him enough time to heal and work through his issues - some of which you were integral in helping him overcome - but by the time you two had settled into becoming adults, Hyunjin had convinced himself that there was truly no chance for the two of you. After all, if the two of you were meant to be, it would have happened by now, right? Or was that just him being cowardly again, too afraid of change? If you loved him, then there would have been signs, but he didn’t see any. You would come, you would accept his affection and kisses, but it was always him that wanted you to stay. That had to mean something, right?

Hyunjins' hands rubbed roughly over his face before sliding upward into his hair, tugging harshly at the roots and staining the locks with splotches of acrylic. He was filled with frustration and loneliness. It’s been weeks since you called him, complaining about The Boyfriend leaving you alone in his apartment to work out. It’s been even longer since he’s even seen you in person. How long, he’s not entirely sure. It’s been agony being without you, but what could he do? If he saw you, Hyunjin wasn’t entirely sure he’d be able to stop himself from pulling you close and kissing you, partially out of habit, but mainly because he missed you.

The sound of a phone call interrupting his music snapped Hyujin from his mental torpor. He hoped to god it wasn’t one of his friends or work. He was in the mood to wallow. However, the contact made his breath stop as he fumbled for his phone, attempting to answer as quickly as possible, to hell with smearing paint on his phone.

“Y/N?” Hyunjin breathed out, causing you to hesitate, surprised by his use of your name.

“Yeah, uh, hi Hyunnie- I- I mean, Hyunjin,” you facepalmed. When were you going to break your habit of using pet names with him? “How… How are you? It’s been a while.”

“Yeah… it has…” Hyunjin answered, still bewildered. A pregnant pause passed before you finally brought yourself to speak, feeling the need to break the silence.

“I miss you, Jinnie.”

“I miss you too, Beautiful.”

“Can I see you?”

“Can you?” Hyunjin asked gently. If he were honest, the reason he hadn't gone to see you is mainly because he didn't feel as if he deserved to. Would it really be alright? Spending time with you, being with you, alone, when he was the one who stepped away in the first place? Him, the guy you were sleeping with, and who The Boyfriend knows is in love with you?

“Of course I can! Just because I'm dating someone doesn't mean I can't see you. He's my boyfriend, not my dad.”

“At least I would hope he's not. That would be weird,” Hyunjin replied rather flatly, but his face broke into a smile when you laughed.

“I'll be over soon,” you said once the giggles subsided.

“I'll be waiting, Beautiful.”

○●☆♡☆●○

Hyunjin felt nervous as he looked at himself in the bathroom mirror. Was he too overdressed? You two were just going to hang out at his place, right? His eyes dragged over his slicked back hair - still wet from his shower, the pricings in his ears, his pinstriped button up shirt, the necklace dangling from his neck, it looked like he was ready for a date. The only thing that was casual on him was his jeans, and even then, if Minho saw him now, he'd say Hyunjin was trying too hard. Maybe he should change?

It was too late. The sound of his doorbell told him you were here. Taking a deep breath, Hyunjin made his way to the door. Time to face you.

When he opened the door, Hyunjin was stunned into a temporary silence. Had you dressed up, too? Or was it just his imagination? Little did Hyunjin know, you had also put effort into looking as casually pretty as you could in your tights, black denim shorts, ankle boots, and button up, long sleeved crop top. You also had the exact same thoughts as he was in the moment.

“Hey, Beautiful. You look gorgeous tonight,” Hyunjin said, pulling you into a short, chaste hug. “Oh, was that okay to say?”

“I think it was?” You giggled, returning the hug, “ thank you, by the way, you look really good too.”

“I always look good,” Hyunjin grinned as he ushered you inside, relishing in the familiarity of your responding eye roll. It was a welcome distraction from the fact that the last time you were in his apartment he was fucking you into ever surface of his apartment. A memory that had been screaming at you too ever since you crossed the threshold into the entryway. This was going to be an interesting evening. Not once since the two of you reconnected had either of you felt so awkwardly around each other.

“Sooooo, did you have anything you wanted to do?” Hyunjin asked tentatively, looking anywhere but at you.

“Well… we both seem to be dressed to go out, wanna… go get dinner?” You suggested as timidly. Hyunjin miles the idea over for a bit before smiling down at you.

“Sure, I could go for food. Let me get my keys, I know a spot.”

○●☆♡☆●○

“You know, when you said you ‘knew a spot���, I didn't think you were talking about a bar.”

“Ah, ah, ah,” Hyunjin tutted, his finger wagging, “bar and grill,” he corrected.

“Whatever,” you said with a roll of your eyes, taking a sip of the drink in front of you. You were in desperate need of alcohol, once again feeling awkward and unsure of how to act. How did you act with Hyunjin before you and Changbin began dating? You weren't sure, and you felt so stupid for it.

An extensive silence passed between the two of you, only being broken by the bartender coming to take your orders. The bar and grill was small, only allowing the impressively large bar and a few tables to fit within the four walls of the establishment, most of their business seemed to have been from take out orders by the way people shuffled in and out. Thank God the weather was starting to warm up.

It was only when the two of you received your food and had begun eating that Hyunjin was unable to bear the silence and the pitying looks from the people around him.

“Okay, enough of the awkward first date energy. This isn't us.”

You sighed, taking another dig at your food before nodding, unable to fight how right he was.

“I just…” you began, “I don't know what to do, basically our whole lives we've never had any boundaries and now that I'm suddenly trying to figure out where to place them, it feels wrong because it's you.” You paused to chew on your lip a bit before taking a swig of your drink, Hyunjin simply sat patiently beside you, listening attentively. “But the thing is, things have changed and as wrong as it feels it's the right thing to do. My main problem is that I'm over analyzing everything, torn between trying to still be your best friend and be Changbins' girlfriend.”

Hyunjin released a small huff, swallowing down his selfish thoughts of how you wouldn't be having these kinds of issues if you were his. Now wasn't the time. Even though he took a step back, you were hurting, and, quite frankly, Hyunjin could sympathize as he was also facing the same conundrum.

“My poor Y/N,” Hyunjin tried his best to sound nonchalant as he popped a fry into his mouth. “I'm not going to sugar coat this, that's rough,” you glared up at him as he held his hand over his plate and ran his thumb over the pads of his ringed fingers, dusting off the crumbs from his fry.

“Thank you, Hyunjin. That is soooo helpful.”

“I'm not trying to be ‘helpful’, I'm agreeing with you,” he corrected with a bit more seriousness than before, adjusting in his seat to face you. “Let's be real here Y/N, this is your first boyfriend since we started our relationship. I'll admit, neither of us knows how to do this without worrying over whether we're crossing any boundaries here, but you know what I just realized, baby? We shouldn't be so worried about this.”

You threw him a quizzical look, egging him to continue. Hyunjin gave you an exasperated sigh, rolling his eyes and leaning back in his chair to continue eating at his food.

“If you're so concerned about boundaries than go talk to The Boyfriend about it, not your friends who you used to fuck. Secondly, other than the fact that we've stopped fucking, nothing else has changed about us, so what's there to overthink? We just have to break a few habits is all.” Hyunjin earnestly tried to sound collected, informative even - judging by the enlightened glow softening your features, he was successful - but truly Hyunjin spoke with more confidence than he had. “Break a few habits”? How the hell was he supposed to casually stop pulling you close to hold you gently or kiss your lips when, even now, he was longing to lay his hand over yours? To pour out every ounce of love he has for you until it fills you whole?

“Oh my god, Hyunnie, you're a genius,” you suddenly mumbled out, making him break out into a smile.

“You should tell me that now often,” was his curt reply as he continued eating his food, with you following suit.

After that conversation came easy. You two had tons to talk about, eager to catch up on the time you've spent apart: New hobbies, change in work conditions, how the change in weather has affected your respective wardrobes and how you were needing to buy new sandals for the upcoming warm weather, Hyunjin was even in such a good mood that he was willing to ask questions about your relationship with Changbin - much to your surprise.

“What about you, Jinnie? Any repeat offenders since I've been gone?”

“Nah, I've actually stopped the casual hookups.” You choked on your drink in surprise, coughing into a napkin as Hyunjin patted your back.

“Is the Hwang Hyunjin seriously off the market? What made you stop the hookups?” Hyunjin shrugged, giving you a sheepish smile.

“My painting has just been taking up more of my time, making me happier. If I'm not at work or the guys, I'm at home with my art.” You blinked at him, truly looking at him under the dim bar lights and drinking in his expression. You couldn't remember the last time he looked so content outside of his mornings alone with you.

“Hyunjin, will you show me?” The words were out of your mouth before you could process the fact you had even said them. Hyunjins gaze turned to you and softened, his smile growing but retaining its contentment.

“Of course, Beautiful.”

○●☆♡☆●○

You sat perched on the edge of Hyunjins couch, watching him with amusement as he dashed in and out of a spare room, collecting his favorite pieces. Some were on canvases, painted in oils or acrylics, others were on sheets, scribbles of pencils, charcoal, ink, and pastels flooding the pages. You were impressed. He hadn't limited himself to a single medium, as if testing which one he would find himself only to see there was a piece of him in all of them.

“What, no sculptures?” You teased as he set some loose leaves of paper beside you on the couch. Hyunjins head snapped up, and his sheepish smile returned, all white teeth and crescent moon eyes.

“I don't think I have space for sculpting,” he said with a chuckle, standing upright to scan the pieces he's picked out. “Okay, yeah, I think these are all of my favorites. What do you think?”

“I think you look like a pregnant mom when you put your hands on your waist like that.” Hyunjins baffled face looked down to his pose, suddenly seeing what you meant before playfully batting at your arm.

“Yah! I meant the art!”

After your giggles died down, you made Hyunjin go get you a drink so you could truly appreciate the copious amount of art laid out before you without anxious eyes drilling into you. You were amazed at the story the pieces told, a clear depiction of Hyunjins' rapid growth. Hyunjin had laid everything out in the order he made them, grouping them off by medium. In every group was seemingly his first ever attempt at each category and you were so impressed by how the third or fourth piece he had seemed to have gotten a firm grasp on what he was doing - but he especially excelled at mixing oils, charcoal, and pastels. Pieces of implied figures defined by rough, purposefully unstructured lines and filled in with smears of colors became a staple as you continued to flip through pieces. One of your favorite pieces was what appeared to be a page of scribbles, but as you focused your gaze, the features of a familiar face came into view. You were unable to put a finger on who the person in question was, but you were able to make out that it was a woman.

“Here we go, one hot chocolate with marshmallow and whipped cream.” You head jerked up as Hyunjin returned with two mugs, and you mumbled a thank you as you took it, making room so Hyunjin could sit beside you.

“So, thoughts?” He asked as he took a drink from his mug, smiling at how you already had whipped cream clinging to your lips.

“Mmh, I love these. You got so good, so fast.”

“I told you my art's been taking up more of my time. I've been kind of addicted to the feeling of making something.”

“It suits you,” you smiled, resting your mug of chocolate on your leg and reaching for your favorites. “I love these. You can really see that at this point you've developed a style, and it's really cool.”

Hyunjin looked at the pieces you've collected, chuckling at himself. You probably didn't notice, but, in a way, each of these were about you. One was an abstract portrait of your face, based on a memory from when the two of you were kids. The second was what it felt like whenever he made love to you, not whenever he would fuck you silly, but when he would hold you gently, kiss you passionately, and would tell you he loved you in every other way but in words. The third was a representation of the pain he felt, realizing that despite everything, you would never truly be his.

“Would you like them, Beautiful?”

“Oh, Hyunnie, really?” You asked with glee, your bright smile filling him with joy.

“Of course, I wouldn't let anyone else have them,” he said gently, reaching out to wipe the whipped cream that you so selfishly refused to lick from your lips. You gasped at the contact, his fingers eliciting flames beneath your skin, and you found your abruptly standing, setting down your drink and making your way to the door of the make-shift art studio.

“So what else have you been working on?” You asked with a bit more force than was needed.

In a panic, Hyunjin bolted from the couch, almost spilling his hot chocolate over some of his charcoal sketches as he hastily set down the mug.

“No, no, no, barred from entry!” Hyunjin shouted, lifting you from the ground mere seconds before you could even touch the handle.

“Ah! Hyunjin, put me down!”

“No!”

“Why can't I go in?!”

“Because I said so!” Hyunjin rebuttaled, putting you back down on the ground but refusing to let you go. For a moment, you believed you had a chance to escape, but before you could even attempt to sprint away, Hyunjins fingers began dancing at your side. You squealed, squirming and jolting as Hyunjin tickled you mercilessly.

“I- I want… to seeeeee!” You whined between gasps of air, but Hyunjin only doubled down, releasing your waist entirely to tickle you with both hands, causing you to drop to your knees with Hyunjin following.

“Barred. From. Entry.” He enunciated, reaching beyond your sides to any vulnerable spot he could use to his advantage, giggling as you attempted to squirm away.

“Okay, okay, I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I won't go in, I promise!” You acquiesced.

Instantly, Hyunjin removed his hands, letting you sit up and catch your breath before wrapping his arms around you. Resting your head on his chest, you pouted, a childish need to see what he was currently working on rushing through you.

“You must be working on something big. You never hide anything from me.” You felt Hyunjins’ laugh rumble in his chest as he nuzzled your head.

“Don't be mad, it's just… the art in there. If I let you see it, it would be like I let you read my diary. I get really vulnerable in there and not that I don't trust you, but I've just been… feeling some things I'm not ready to share with anyone yet.”

You pouted again, this time at yourself, feeling silly. He shouldn't feel like he had to defend himself. That wasn't fair to him. Yes, it hurt not being aware of every facet of his life, but he deserved to have things he could keep to himself, it was only fair considering there were things you could no longer share with him either now that your relationship has changed. So, with a huff, you relented.

“Don't apologize, Jinnie, I'm just being pouty. If you feel like it's too private, then I won't pry,” you reassured him, leaning up and pressing a chaste kiss to his cheek.

Hyunjins heart gave a clunky thud but he attempted to just take the moment for what it was. A warm moment between friends, a moment where one friend was simply reassuring the other and showing her comfort through a platonic show of affection. But when Hyunjin pulled away, fully intending to simply smile and thank you, his eyes met your lips over your gaze and he couldn't feel anything other than the warmth of your body in his arms, the softness of your hair, the memories of your lips against his and thoughtlessly he began to lean in.

You held your breath, completely captivated by the electricity buzzing between the two of you. Your mind was blank, your body waiting for the heat that always came when Hyunjins lips brushed against yours. If you closed your eyes, you could always recall how he'd tease whenever he had the time to, how he would ghost his lips over yours before pressing into you more aggressively, lingering just long enough that you melt before snapping away and leaving you breathless.

It was when Hyunjins ringed hand rested against your cheek that you broke back into reality, the cold metal a biting reminder that he was too close.

“Hyunjin…” you breathed, his lips a breath away from yours.

A slight gasp spilled from Hyunjin as he swiftly pulled away from you, standing and walking into the living room. He had to put as much space between you and him as possible. What the hell was he doing? What was wrong with him?

“Oh god, Y/N, I'm so sorry. I don't know what came over me.” Hyunjin could feel the guilt washing over him and had to bury his face in his hands to keep himself calm. He couldn't help but notice that the metal on his hands wasn't as cold as it usually would be.

This was it, though, right? He's totally crossed a line. Surely you'd never want to be alone with him again.

“Ah… that was close,” you said after a moment, your head still reeling. “I guess this is what you meant when you said we'd need to break a few habits.” Now it was your turn to smile sheepishly. Hyunjin dropped his hands, and your heart constricted as wide, glassy eyes looked over to you.

“You're not mad?”

“What? Hyunjin, no, of course I'm not mad. It's not like we actually kissed, we just got caught up in the moment,” you said, walking over and taking one of his hands in yours, your gaze focused on twiddling with his fingers. You had wanted to hug him but thought better of it, you didn't want to risk another close call. “I… I'm not saying I feel good about what almost happened, but… this is our first time seeing each other since Changbin and I started dating, and we're still… adjusting. I don't know if this really is the right thing to say, but I don't think we did anything wrong since we didn't actually kiss.”

Your eyes trailed up to his, your gaze holding his in a silent urge for him to calm down. Taking a deep breath, Hyunjin nodded, running his free hand through his hair.

“I guess… it wouldn't be bad of us to give each other a little bit of grace, yeah?”

“Yeah, I think so too,” you said with relief, dropping his hand and taking a step back, trying to work some breathing room between the two of you. “And if you're really feeling bad about this, you can always paint about it in your little room there.”

Scoffing Hyunjin tossed a pillow from the couch at you, walking over to the spare room and rapping on the door with his knuckles.

“I’ll let you see it if I ever do.”

“I'll hold you to that.”

After a beat of silence, you decided now was a good time to bow out, still feeling awkward from the almost kiss and not wanting to push your luck. Hyunjin walked you to your car but made sure to keep a small gap between you two, too afraid to even touch you. He may still want you but not like this, he never wanted to ruin your happiness in such a way, so instead he simply imagined a part of him was being held close in the three pieces you clutched tightly to your chest.

Once you had wished him goodnight and drove off, Hyunjin dashed back inside and changed into his ratty paint attire. He needed to paint, to vent, to get out all of the overflowing feelings he had struggled so desperately to reign in the moment he almost kissed you.

Walking into his studio, he gathered his supplies and replaced the canvas he had on the easel with a painting he had been working on periodically. This one was special. He had to get it right. Stepping back, he looked over the piece before continuing to render out the forms, sweeping his brush over his pallet and collecting hues that matched the mood he wanted to convey. If he was being honest with himself, out of all the pieces, this was the one he wanted you to see the least, the main centerpiece of all his vulnerability and desires. He had been struggling to name it, but after tonight, he knew exactly what to call it. Taking a nearby hard pastel, Hyunjin turned over the canvas, scrawlling in swift motions the words:

“What Once was Mine”

---------------------------------------

DEAR GOD I STRUGGLED LIKE A MOTHERFUCKER TRYING TO WRAP THIS CHAPTER UP!!! I started off all well and good, had a good rhythm going. Then freaking mom life stepped in and next thing I knew it was Friday already, what the FAWK???? I barely got this chapter out by the skin of my teeth 😭

Anyway just... here, here ya go. Enjoy the moral shades of grey with that almost kiss at the end. I'm gonna go rest my eyes now omg.

Taglist: @groovygroovyhyunjin @hhwangsmoon @luvyblossom @doggezz@kayleefriedchicken @hyunjinhoexxx

[underskz]

➪ angst // bang chan x reader

content warning: cheating + affairs

“what about us?”

✰ prompt list

“Hey.” Strong hands find their way around your waist, plump lips skimming along your jaw before you plant your hands on his chest and push him away. He hesitates for a moment before letting you escape his grasp.

“We have to stop.” You stand firm before him, decision already made.

“But, what about us?” He looks at you wide eyed.

“There…there is no us, these past few months were just stolen moments that n-never should’ve happened.” The words get caught in your throat, feeling more like broken glass with each one uttered. “I’m married and you’re engaged a-and we both need to let go of the past.”

Years ago there was an “us”, you and Chan and a million happy memories that fell apart in the blink of an eye. You had moved on, he had moved on.

Until one drunken mistake a few months ago, all the regret swallowed down when you were allowed to bask in his presence once more. But reality sunk its claws in, there wasn’t a future for the two of you, there never was.

“I’ll call it off, today if that’s what you want, I’ll end it because I choose you.” He takes a step forward, you take a step back.

“I can’t, I don’t, Chan I don’t want that.” You swallow down “I’m not choosing you. I’m, I’m sorry.”

[minhosimthings]

Do I love Bang Chan and Jay with my entire heart and soul? Yes, yes I do.

Will I make Bang Chan and Jay my biases? No, no I won't.

But will my I continue to simp over them and cheat on my lovely first husbands Minho and Jake?

Yes, yes I indeed will.

[spohkh]

why is this man putting on a whole entire passion play with thousands of girlies right now.

[hanadulsetaad]

"In the Warmth of Trust: A Promise Recalled" part 2

BANG CHAN X READER x stray kids

(part 1)

TYPE: ANGST, CHEATING, fluff

( i feel the ending is very cringe but this only came in my mind)

(also bang chan is an angel, this is just fictional)

When Chan broke up with you and you stopped eating or going out, your dream of mastering your studies turned to shit and you scored the lowest grade in your class. All you did was text Bang Chan and cry for him until he blocked you. When the results of your first semester came, you were broken. You couldn't believe that you let Chan's situation waste six months of your life and take away half of your dream college experience. You went to your grade professor and explained the whole situation. Luckily, your college had two batches a year: the December winter batch and the summer batch in June. Your professor asked you to reappear in the December batch, which was ideal. That winter batch changed your life. It's been seven years since Chan's situation. You just turned 30 and were actually preparing for the reunion of your undergraduate batch in Korea with Changbin. You and Changbin both became college professors: he was in the music department and you were a law professor.

Fast forward to the reunion. You met all of your friends, but then you heard Changbin yell, "OMG!" and you turned to see Bang Chan and Felix. You felt no emotions; you were just happy to see they were okay and doing well in life. Changbin dragged you to see your old group, and you instantly got deja vu when everyone in the group blocked you, including Changbin. When you saw Bang Chan and Felix, Felix looked at you in an apologetic way. He pushed Bang Chan and hugged you, saying, "I am sorry for everything. I didn't know you didn't dump Chan; it was Chan who dumped you." You just smiled at Lix and said, "What happened was in the past, let it go."

Before you could reply to Chan, Changbin, Hyunjin, and all of them started beating up Bang Chan and Felix. Both Chan and Felix left Korea and went back to Australia five months after you left Japan. They started their own company in Australia, and since they got busy, they lost touch with the whole group. All of you sat, and Felix asked you, "Y/N, you are the only one whose life is a mystery." All of them looked at you, and you said, "Really?"

Felix asked, "What happened after all that drama? I don't even know how you and the guys became friends again. I mean, when Changbin hyung called me to come for this meet up, he also mentioned how Bang Chan was the one who left you. NGL, I stopped talking to him for two months, but at the end, I had to talk since he was my partner." You smiled, "It's okay, Felix." Chan and Felix looked at you and asked, "So what were you up to in these years? You don't even have social media; you look different."

Y/N said, "Are you saying I got fat, Christopher Bang?" Changbin quickly said, "Hey, it's happy post-baby weight gain," and Bang Chan and Felix were shocked. Chan's disappointment was showing on his face with regrets. Felix got more excited and asked you about your life. You replied, "Well, when my college ended, I had to come back to Korea. After coming back, I was a guest lecturer and preparing for the assistant professor exams. While preparing, I suddenly bumped into Changbin, and he gave me the dirtiest look ever. I ignored him, and he made a comment, 'Look, cheater is back.' I was angry; I turned and hit him with my book and yelled at him, 'Me, cheater? Really, Changbin? Your friend was the one who broke up with me and at the same week got together with Sana, and I am a cheater?' That's when Changbin, Hyunjin, and I.N. all came to me and apologized. I never wanted to be friends with them again because they believed Chan, but everyone deserves a second chance, right?"

Felix said, "Hey, hey, you didn't tell us about your baby and your partner?" Y/N laughed, "Well, I met my 'husband' (the word 'husband' made Bang Chan's eyes more regretful) in Japan itself. I was roaming in the market street and spotted a familiar face. We both looked at each other, and you know, it was only six months after the breakup from Chan, and I got news that I had to repeat a semester. I was emotional, so I just looked at him and started crying." Felix interrupted, "Wait, wait, wait, so you knew him?" Y/N replied, "Yep, he was from our batch. He just stood there and comforted me."

Y/N: Well, after the meeting, I asked him not to talk to the gang about this since I wanted to talk to everyone directly. And since I was starting a new college, I didn't want people from the past to be back again. My husband and I talked to each other via FaceTime every day. He came to Japan for my graduation and asked me on a date.

Felix: Aww.

Y/N: But I said no. Haha, I actually didn't want to be in a relationship. I had zero trust. So, he waited for my answer for one year, and one day when I saw him taking care of me, I confessed to him. Since then, we are stronger than ever. We got married two years ago, and we just had a baby girl. My husband was the reason I improved my grades in college, and I believed in love again. He was my strength and pillar during my worst times. I thought I would never believe in happiness again.

Bang Chan was shattered. He couldn't even look at you in the eye because he realized you lost your friends and had to repeat a semester because of him, just because he wanted to fool around with Sana for a few weeks.

Felix asked Y/N, "Hey, show us a picture of your baby." Y/N showed him the picture, and he said, "OMG, she is so cute! She looks like a bunny." Lee Know yelled from the back, "Of course, she is cute; she is my daughter." Everyone looked back at Lee Know, who was holding your daughter, who was wearing a bear suit. Felix ran to Lee Know, and Lee Know thought felix was giving him a hug , but Felix just snatched your daughter from him and started taking selfies with her. While everyone was laughing, Chan went to Lee Know and said, "Thanks for taking care of Y/N." Lee Know said with a cold look, "You don't have to thank me." He made his way to the gang who were literally fighting each other to hold your and Lee Know's daughter. Bang Chan just stood there, watching you, Lee Know, and your daughter being the perfect family with your friends, and he found himself alone.

[rens-peekaboo-nipples]

I said i was ready. I LIED. This is my first come back as a stay. I need more time 🫠

After work for sure. Yeah.. 🥲

[delusiondolly]

Needy girl.

Summary: You wanted to make Chris jealous but you didn’t think it out enough.

Pairing: Bang Chan x fem!reader

Genre : little bit of angst , smut , fluff towards the end

word count : 1.4k

Warnings : cheating , name calling , rough handling, hair pulling , oral sex (m receiving) , spanking , rough sex , unprotected sex (don’t ), creampie , overstimulation.

Notes : I just be having lots of ideas for stray kids , they shall be coming soon though. I’m trying to get as much of these ideas out but this is my first time writing smut, I hope I did good, I could use some pointers as well. I was listening to railway and pornstar by nessa Barrett while writing this. The edit of Chris I saw was so good it made big mama throb😼.

(This is not proof read , forgive me🧍🏽‍♀️)

It was one of those days where you felt needy and when you were needy. You’d become a brat.

You had this crazy idea to get at Chris because he was still at the studio , working overtime when he was supposed to be home hours ago. You know how Chris got when you’d go out late without telling him or at least texting him and letting him know you were going out.

Your girls had asked if you wanted to go out a few hours earlier but you had the thought to decline but you were looking for some excitement right now so you hit your girls up and asked where’d y’all be going. After texting back and forth in the group chat , you started to get ready. You were feeling a low cut black dress with some small black heels. As you looked in the mirror , you could just imagine what Chris was going to do to you. All you wanted was to give him a taste of his own medicine.

The drive to the place your friends said you were meeting up at was a bougie club. (clubs just seem like a fitting setting for this rn) As you got out your car ,you noticed some messages from Chris.

Mr.Bang : Just got home, where are you ? 8:00pm

Mr.Bang : Hello? 8:30pm

Mr.Bang : Y/N , if your trying to be funny, it’s not funny. 8:50pm

When you noticed the time , it was 10 o’clock

“No point in backing out now .” Y/N thought

So you turned your phone off and went inside the club.

You noticed your girls at a table in the middle of the club so you walked to them.

“Hey bitches”

As you all started settling down , you decided to get the first round of shots because you were planning to have fun before Chris got to you but you knew when he came , you’d enjoy every moment of it.

After several rounds of shots , y’all started to disappear to the dance floor. You knew Chris was coming at any second because you never turned your location off. You didn’t want to tick him off bad , turning off your location would’ve sent him over the edge.

You were currently grinding on a random man , just thinking about Chris. You knew you were in for it. You were basically cheating on him. You loved Chris so much that you’d never cheat on him or hurt him. You just wanted to have fun and show him what it felt like when he promised he would be home more often but he broke the promise and that hurt.

You were just thinking , not noticing Chris walking into the club. You felt the urge to check your surroundings so you looked up and saw Chris basically exploding, what happened next was a blur. You were dancing on someone now being dragged out of the club by your very angry boyfriend.

“Chris” you called

He just flat out ignored you

When you got to his car , he basically threw you in the passenger seat. You guess you would come get your car tomorrow. If you could walk.

The car ride was silent. The silence made you uncomfortable but you were turned on. As Chris was pulling up to your shared apartment, you tried speaking to him but he just parked the car , got out , and dragged you out the car all the way up to the apartment.

When you guys were inside , you turned around while Chris had his back to you.

“Chris-“

“Shut the fuck up.” Chris said

“You didn’t return my messages because you just wanted to go out and whore yourself out with your friends.

“You want to be a slut , I’ll show you how sluts get treated.” Chris deadpanned

You couldn’t process what happened next but Chris grabbed you by your hair and dragged you to your shared bedroom. He had thrown you to the floor and made his way to the foot of the bed. You were rubbing your thighs together , you were so turned on. Chris watched you get off on his anger towards you. You tried to collect yourself but Chris yet again grabbed your hair and started to unbuckled his pants.

“You're getting off on this. Such a fucking slut”

You started to help Chris with his pants but he smacked your hands away.

“Don’t fucking touch me slut. Your only job is to suck my cock like a good slut. That’s all your fucking good for.” Chris said

Once he got his pants down, he took no time to just gather your hair up into a makeshift ponytail and shove your head down on his cock. You started to bob your head up and down but Chris being so big , it was getting hard for you to breathe.

slob was running all down your chin, eyes watering as you made eye contact with Chris.

Chris threw his head back and started to thrust his towards your face. You couldn’t breathe while Chris was fucking your throat but you were enjoying it so much, the feeling of the tip of his cock hitting the back of your throat , the sounds of his grunts and moans , you knew your voice was gonna be fucked in the morning (literally).

“Your gonna swallow all my cum amd if I so if see a little drop fall out your mouth , you won’t cum tonight.” Chris grunted out.

Chris was getting close and before you knew it , he was cumming down your throat. You made sure you didn’t spill any of it like his good girl. You loved the taste of him, salty.

“Strip.”

That’s all you had to hear and your clothes were off in a heartbeat.

Chris now has you bent over the edge of the bed. You felt his hand rub your ass then he stopped.

!THWAP!

The way you screamed as you felt Chris spank you. Chris had gotten his leather belt and he had the means to punish you right now before he fucked the lights out of you.

“You're gonna count everytime I hit you , if you mess up then we’ll started over, got it slut ?”

“Yes sir”

!THWAP!

“TWO”

!THWAP!

“T-THREE”

Chris continued until he had spanked you ten times. You were a sobbing mess right now , Chris dropped his belt and started to massage your sore and raw ass cheeks.

“Have you learned your lesson baby?”

“y-yes daddy , I’m sorry , I just missed you so much and I just wanted to feel how it felt when you broke your promise.” You cried

Chris' heart broke, you did all this because of him.

“I’m sorry baby, how bout daddy make it up to you hmm? You want daddy to fuck you to sleep ?”

“Yes daddy, I need it .”

Chris started to stroke his hard cock. He didn’t even want to prep you, he wanted to give his baby what she needed. Chris cock started to poke your entrance , you started to whine as you felt him bully his big cock in your little hole.

“Fuck daddy , too much”

“Shh baby , I got you” Chris groaned

It took a few minutes for Chris to bottom out but once he did , you were already fucked out , so full of his cock. Chris has started to set a brutal pace , knocking the air out of you.

You were clutching the sheets for dear life as Chris was brutally abusing your hole. You felt so overstimulated

“Fuck, too much daddy”

“Baby you can take it , I know you can”

Chris started to thrust faster , he was determined on stuffing you full of his come. Chris knowing you were close , you started to squeeze him in. You felt chris’ hand grab the back of your neck and push you further in the bed.

“I’m cumming”

“You gonna let daddy cum inside you huh baby? Let daddy make you a pretty mommy?”

“Yes daddy.” You moaned

With that you came hard, Chris wasn’t far behind you. He started ramming his hips into yours. Your hole wanted his cum so you started sucking him in and he came. You felt so full, you and Chris’ juices running down your legs.

Chris pulled out of you and you collapsed on the bed. As you started to fall asleep, Chris woke you up with a wet washcloth , he was cleaning you up. Once he was finished , he made sure you peed then he laid both of you down.

Chris kissed you goodnight and promised he’d do better.

[ivyues]

Stray Kids Masterlist

Reactions:

Surprise Visits and Silent Tears: Finding their S/O crying (hurt/comfort, fluff)

Animal Fears: Their S/O's SKZOO phobia (fluff, humor)

Rejected Embraces and Heavy Hearts: Their S/O refusing a hug (angst) -> pt.2: Reconciling Comfort (hurt/comfort, fluff)

Unfiltered Beauty: Their S/O not wearing makeup often (fluff, humor)

Unlocked Trust: The sharing of a phone PIN (humor)

Passionate Attacks: Their S/O suddenly kissing them (suggestive, fluff)

First-Night-Nerves and Quite Moments: First sleepovers (fluff)

Scars of the Past: Finding out their S/O was cheated on in the past (hurt/comfort, fluff)

Anxious Introductions: Their S/O being nervous to meet the members (fluff)

Friendly Fire: Accidently causing their S/O a minor injury (fluff, hurt/comfort, angst-isch)

Sleeves Pulled Back: Their S/O's s/h scars (hurt/comfort, fluff)

Echos of Home: Their S/O not being close with their parents (hurt/comfort, angst-isch fluff)

Reunited Moments: Seeing their S/O after a long time (comfort, fluff)

Sibling Bonds: Skz x Member's sister Scenarios (humor, fluff)

Cold Hands, Warm Hearts: Their S/O always having cold hands (fluff)

Love Bites: Their S/O scolding them for having left a hickey (humor)

Imagines:

– Bang Chan –

One-Time Special Edition: You not being cuddly changed one morning (fluff)

Ruined for anyone else: "If we ever broke up, I think you ruined me for anyone else" (fluff)

Studio Interruptions: Changbin didn't expect to walk in on an passionate encounter (fluff, humor)

Dreaming of Peaches: He has a dream of little curls and your eyes (fluff)

Laptop Delivery: Practice got a little more eventful thanks to an forgotten laptop (humor, fluff)

A Lap to Nap: He finds peace in your lap, but duty calls him back to the studio (fluff, humor)

Boyfriend Taxi: He thought he was just dropping you off, but now he's meeting your friends (fluff, humor)

Beneath the Midnight Stars: "I didn't want to date, but now you're the one thing holding everything together" (fluff)

Chasing Yesterday: Years after splitting paths, he didn't expect a text to bring an old friend – and old feelings – back into his life pt.2, pt.3, pt.4, pt.5 (fluff, 10k)

Hotter Than Expected: How you found out your boyfriend can't handle spicy food (humor, fluff)

Someday: Under the Australian sunset, he stands in front of his first and current love, one he wants forever (fluff)

– Lee Know –

Aishitemasu: His motivation for studying Japanese might not just be due to the fans (humor, fluff)

Early Bird: While you're still tangled in the sheets, he fills the kitchen with quite affection (fluff)

Feline Approval: How Soonie and he agreed you were the one (fluff)

A Snowy Promise: With his enlistment approaching, he contemplates building a deeper commitment with you (fluff)

Quite Rhythms: As the neighbour's music seeps through the walls, he pulls you close (fluff)

– Han –

Borrowed Warmth: Han didn’t realize the hoodie he grabbed wasn’t his (fluff, humor)

Lyric stolen, Heart taken: During your date night, you stumble upon lyrics that feel a little too familiar (fluff)

Soft Nuzzles: Lately, you couldn’t shake the urge to nuzzle into Han’s neck (fuff)

Mornings with You (and low Ceilings): A lazy morning turn hilarious and hardwarming as Han crashed into the ceiling (fluff)

Just One More: Goodbyes always take a little longer thanks to your lovely boyfriend (fluff)

– Seungmin –

Sm x Lee Know's sister (fluff, humor, ~ 10k)

pt.1: Tangled Lines

pt.2: Caught in the Middle

pt.3: Future Hyung-in-Law

pt.4: Chauffeur Duties

pt.5: Puppy Love

Paws off my Human: Meeting your dog was more difficult than he thought (fluff, humor)

1 Month, 1.000 Jokes: To him, you being slightly older was never a big deal (humor, fluff)

[kpop-reactions-povs]

Stray kids- When their gf kisses them when they want something

@s3ungm1nxxl0ve ❤️

⸻

Bang Chan

He squints at you the second your lips brush his cheek. “What do you want, baby?” he teases, wrapping his arms around you anyway. You give him your best innocent eyes, but he’s already grinning. “Don’t think I don’t know what you’re doing.” Still, he melts when you kiss him again—he’s weak for affection, and even weaker when it comes from you. “Fine, what is it? You know I can’t say no to that face…”

⸻

Lee Know

You lean in and kiss his jaw, smiling sweetly. “Minnieee,” you whisper in your best soft voice. He blinks at you. “What are you trying to get out of me now?” He tries to act all stern but you know the exact way to melt him. When you start peppering his face with kisses, he groans dramatically. “Ugh, I knew I should’ve run when I saw that look in your eyes. What do you want, princess?”

⸻

Changbin

The second your lips press to his, Changbin’s already blushing. “Wait—what do you want now?” he laughs nervously. You smile and tug on his sleeve. “Nothinggg~” He narrows his eyes. “Don’t lie to me like that. That’s the ‘Changbinnie, buy me something’ kiss.” Even as he says it, he’s already pulling out his phone like a lovesick puppy. “I swear, you own me.”

⸻

Hyunjin

You kiss his neck and his whole body stiffens, a little dramatic gasp escaping him. “Yah! That’s cheating!” You grin innocently, and he grabs your waist with exaggerated suspicion. “What did you do? What do you want?” When you whisper your request in his ear, he groans but kisses your temple. “Only because I’m stupidly in love with you…”

⸻

Han

You plop into his lap and start giving him kisses, and he’s instantly suspicious. “Hmm… this is suspiciously sweet.” You start nuzzling his cheek and he squints at you. “Nope. Nope. You’re planning something.” You whisper your request and he flops dramatically back. “You are dangerous. A menace. A sweet, kissy little menace.” Then he kisses you back. “Fine. But only because you taste like strawberries.”

⸻

Felix

You kiss his cheek softly and he’s already smiling like the sun. “Hmm? What was that for?” You bat your lashes, and he chuckles, knowing you too well. “You want something, don’t you?” When you shyly ask for it, he just pulls you closer and kisses your forehead. “You could’ve just asked, love… but I’m not complaining.”

⸻

Seungmin

You sneak a kiss to his lips while he’s reading, and he slowly lowers his book. “You don’t usually kiss me like that when I’m busy,” he says suspiciously. “What do you want?” You giggle and rest your head on his shoulder. “Nothinggg…” He smirks. “Liar.” But he’s already setting his book down and pulling you into his lap. “Let’s hear it then, what is it this time?”

⸻

I.N

You give him a soft kiss on the neck while he’s doing something and he turns with a wide-eyed smile. “Whoa, what did I do to deserve that?” You grin and stay quiet. He squints playfully. “No way. You want something, don’t you?” When you finally admit it, he groans. “You’re too cute. This isn’t fair.” Then he grins and leans in, kissing you back. “Fine. But next time, I’m bribing you with kisses instead.”

[kflixnet]

Check out our member Vaish's drabble!

Tolerate It

Pairing: Bang Chan x fem reader Genre: angst, established relationship Summary: You know your love for your husband should be celebrated, but instead, it’s tolerated. Warnings: Unhappy marriage, mentions of cheating, swearing, toxic spouse, gaslighting, emotional abuse Word Count: 919  

“Where were you last night?” 

Chan sets down his fork with a heavy thud and puts his head in his hands, visibly frustrated. “Not this again.”

You hold back tears as you wordlessly rise, placing your plate in the sink and leaving the kitchen while ignoring the incessant calls of your husband. You already know the answer to your own question, but you ask him anyway, maybe because you still love him and can’t pretend that every single time this happens, you’re not dying on the inside. But maybe you’re also asking him because it’s your duty. It’s your duty to be a faithful wife to your husband, to look after him and love him. And you do all of it. 

Every single day, like clockwork, you wake up at five to cook him a hearty breakfast and prepare him a lunch packed with love. You have memorized how he likes his coffee at different intervals in the day. When he comes home from work, you take his coat and briefcase before seating him at your dinner table and welcoming him with a delicious home cooked meal. You give him shoulder massages while he watches TV and doesn’t even thank you. Your children are never a challenge to their father, only a joy, because you are willing to bear the burden of the more difficult parts of your children’s upbringing. You gave up your passion to commit to a lifetime of serving him. Instead, you work a tedious desk job that’s soulless, but stable, so you can come home early. For him. You can and will drop everything and go to him if he merely whispered your name. Under your watchful eye, the house is always sparkling clean and inviting at all times, just for your husband. 

But you’ve never been good to yourself. You have never spared a single thought for your own wellbeing and sanity. You can’t even fathom holding your heart together while it breaks, because you’re too busy slaving away for the man who shatters it, over and over again.

As you enter your bedroom, you can’t even slam the door shut and lock yourself inside, because you know your husband will want to come and rest soon. The children are fast asleep in their own rooms, and you’ve dined with your husband. You have fulfilled your responsibilities for the day, and now, you shed the flawless facade as you desire.

Collapsing onto the bed, your body racks with fast, choked sobs, and you know you are completely and utterly alone. For a long time, you’ve been unfeeling. Chan stabs at you, again and again, and yet, you never responded, numbly taking it all. You knew what he did after hours, all of those times that he called home and breathlessly explained that he would be working late. Or those times he stumbled into the house, limbs disoriented and hair mussed, mumbling about a harmless trip to the bar with his boys. And then there was when he waltzed in with a lipstick stain on his collar, the collar that you had neatly pressed in the morning. Some lady bumped into me and accidentally smudged her lipstick on me, you’re just paranoid.

You weren’t stupid. You just didn’t want to feel. Of course, you could not refrain from crying yourself to sleep every night, but nevertheless, when the sun hit your blinds, you pretended you were okay. Last night was different. 

For the first time, he hadn’t bothered even attempting to cover up mistakes, because he wasn’t stupid either. He was aware you knew about his infidelity, and it looked like he didn’t value you enough anymore to even come up with a lie. He had staggered into the kitchen and asked what you had made him for dinner, instead of pushing out his usual pathetic excuses. 

Thinking of him feels like there is a metaphorical balloon in your chest, swelling rapidly but never reaching the apex, the breaking point, because even now, you can never truly fall apart. Falling apart would mean running to your husband and grabbing his arms, screaming at him for a reason why you aren’t good enough anymore. Falling apart would be taking your children, the ones you cared for, and leaving him behind. Falling apart would be falling out of love for him. But you’re still scared, clinging to the hopes of a happy marriage and being truly cherished by the man you are killing yourself for.

It’s why when Chan walks into the darkened room, shutting the door behind him quietly and laying next to you in the bed, you stay quiet instead of having the courage you need to confront him. 

“I’m trying, baby. I’m trying to be better,” Chan whispers into your ear, his arm thrown over your waist and pulling you close. 

You say nothing, just giving him a brief nod while he turns his back to you once and falls asleep. You stay awake, though, and let the silent tears stream down your face. This isn’t the first time he’s promised to change, nor the first time you’re risking your sanity forgiving him. 

Your love is never ending, wishing and pleading for the man you know he could be once again if he tried. You stay running after the man you fell for— someone who was funny, attentive, and sweet. Someone who loved you too, once upon a time. You know your love should be celebrated, but all he does is tolerate it.

NETWORK: @kflixnet TAGLIST: @hamburgers101 @chansburgah @hee0soo @ajxreads @hash2013 @pixigreen @ana-marais98 @ohish @anyamaris @chizumiyoshi @lilydaisyyy @jetblackbelle @chillseo A/N: I have a huge prompt list that I'm starting to tick through (please don't hesitate to send me requests- please check guidelines on my navi post- if you got any, I will do them)! I'm going to be posting a lot, now that I'm traveling on vacation 😼😼

[haarrrys]

└➤BANG CHAN (방찬)

indications ; ♥︎ - smut , ✿ - fluff, ⬤ - angst

# - girl dad -✿- inspired by a tik tok with chan and the twins, and how he's a girl dad.

# - riding -♥︎- this is the view from when you're riding him w.c 0.5k

# - mochi boyfriend channie -♥︎✿-

# - outside clothes -♥︎-

# - whiplash -✿- your boyfriend isn't thrilled when he finds out you've kick-started your caffeine addiction again.

# -little picasso -✿- chan takes care of his daughter alone for the first time while you have a night out

# - my darling -✿- chan enjoys some time with his family

# - little bird -✿- dad!chan; chan's eyes were closed, tears streaming down his cheeks as he held her close, listening to "little bird"

# - sweet mornings -♥︎- morning sex with chan after he’s been away on tour.

# - face -♥︎⬤- a little warning to your boyfriend who is insecure about his face; aka face riding, pussy eating.

# - let me in your ocean, swim -♥︎- In which chan is a little self-conscious and a lot clueless, changbin is his therapist and his wingman, and you get really sick of waiting for chan to get his shit together.

# - size kink -♥︎- chan trying to fit it in but he's too big and he's whispering all kinds of stuff trying to get you to take it and you're frustrated and needy

# - let me love you -♥︎⬤- chris and you have been best friends for many years, slowly beginning to have feelings for each other but you two had never confessed it for fear of rejection, although you know how you both felt about each other.

# - insecure -♥︎⬤- chan is feeling kind of insecure about himself and the reader ends up jerking him off while like cooing to him how pretty he is

# - asleep and adored -✿- a short sleepy drabble about bang chan when he gets tired

# - keep playing -♥︎- you tease chan while he plays the piano. he returns te favor, nearly destroying his piano in the process. w.c 2.8k

# - let me in your ocean, swim -♥︎✿⬤- In which chan is a little self-conscious and a lot clueless, changbin is his therapist and his wingman, and you get really sick of waiting for Chan to get his shit together. w.c 9.9k words

# - corruption -♥︎- VIRGIN!FEM!READER, PERV!CHAN, BEST FRIENDS TO LOVERS w.c 2.2K

# - push pull -♥︎⬤- in which reader is distant and chan is upset

# - sweet -♥︎- you’re his best friend’s little sister. he’s obsessed with you, and you him. he has very good self control—until he’s forced to share a tent with you. forced proximity with corruption kink. w.c 4.1k

# - dream of you -♥︎✿⬤- he cheated on you— in your dreams, then took kiss it better too literally. w.c 4k

# - into it -♥︎- the california sunset looks pretty damn good when you're on the hood of chan's car. w.c 3k

# - wish you would -⬤- he shouldn't love you, but he doesn't know how to make it stop. w.c 2.8k

# - myth -♥︎✿- Skimming across the edge of being friends and something more with Chan is a dangerous game. Even more so when you're both sharing the same bed.

# - peaches + bangchan -✿- pregnant!y/n with bang chan

# - size kink -♥︎-

# - kiss it better

# - to much tank tops

# - misunderstandings -⬤- in which you are hurt by something chan said.

# - bf!chan -♥︎✿-

# - ten things -✿- ten things bang chan says when he thinks you’re asleep

# - the art of love -♥︎✿⬤- series when chris texted an artist he found on instagram with the hopes of them designing an album cover for him, he never expected to fall head over heels in love with them.

read other members here !

[giddyfatherchris]

📱skz texts — they think you’re cheating

| including. bang chan, lee know, changbin, hyunjin

type. gn!reader, request <3

warnings. the person y/n is supposedly cheating with can be a he, she or they depending on the member and mentions of cheating

a/n. I DID IIIIITTT!!! i finally posted 🥹 im so sorry it took so lomg, life has been heeeectic but here we are! and might i add i quite like these so.. hehe hope you enjoy babies mwah xxx

maknae line