#As for the rest it's all the usual :D

[sysig]

Requestober 2023 Sketches

The playlist has returned for this year! There will be a few in between, but it should be updating at least once a week on either Wednesday or Friday or both - keep an eye out for your req(s)!

Day 4 got some subtle Black Eye, they are a great pair ♪ You can see I couldn’t fully decide on posing - this will be a theme lol - maybe Sylvia loafing and poking her nose up at Peepers? Or just man-handling him into a snuggle lol, I almost went with that one! But I still ended up going with the first sketch after all, his half-squinted eye was too cute to pass up!

Day 6′s first sketch was also a first-try-correct but lemme try something else lol, I’m glad I went with this one though! Friend looks very fluffy, as does Ghostbur <3 Thank goodness for digital cleaning, Phil’s arm completely confounded me traditionally lol, same with the wings actually

The alt is still cute tho, and sad :’) Ghostbur would still consider Phil his dad! And yes he’s not exactly Will, Phil’s kid ahh </3 And yet he still gets to hug him!! The piece of him that remembers him! It hurts ♥

Day 10 was a great excuse to draw blood lol, I can’t not ♪ I ran out of room since this was the last sketch of the page so while I fully intended for the bloody knife to be continuous with the rest of him, I had to puzzle-piece it all together haha ♫ He’s so scribbly lol

Day 15 was so fun!! Ahhh!! As I mentioned in the tags, I got the notification for this one while I was offline and dozing but even in that state of mind, this was the image that immediately bloomed in my head! I am so pleased I got to make it exactly as intended haha ♪ They’re so cute <3 And it’s always fun to draw Mitsu reacting like “O//o//O” even just in emoji form lol

Day 16′s was fun and silly - I only ended up with the one sketch, it’s been too long since I’ve drawn a Core! It hasn’t been all that long since I’ve watched a Meet the Cores but it has been long while since I’ve picked up Portal 2 or Mel, it’s too bad ‘cause they’re both so cute haha. But I mean, all this Portal stuff has inspired me to get back to playing so hmmm :3c

Day 17 had those two options but for me it wasn’t even a question lol - I do of course love RGB but I’ve made a habit of drawing him! And I did get to draw him later as well, so I got all the character diversity I could ask for haha. I’m so sad that I missed out on the “tk” SFX in the final version, I made it and then just forgot to turn the layer back on before exporting lol, just hear it in your head if you would ♪

Day 18, more blood! Moreeee! Thank you for all the Yanderapy attention this year ahhh, it’s so gratifying to know these boys are being enjoyed ♥ I love them too! And it was doubly fun to imagine them playing into their baser urges, yandere-wise haha ♪ What’s the fun of a yandere if they can’t have a little blood, as a treat? Hehe ♫ Mitsuru’s swirly eyes are one of my favourite yandere features of his, drawing it in full swing was really fun :D

Day 19, a bit of Ranboo ♥ It’s been long enough that I’d forgotten how much I enjoy Ranboo! c!Ranboo as well as The Guy haha, they’ve gotten more chaotic lately it seems, good for them. He’s also still quite fun to draw, that’s just good character design for you ♪ A cute little squished face, wanting to go out and play. You can kinda tell from the flower boxes that even traditionally I wasn’t all that detail-oriented for this one lol

Day 20 got a lot of concept art! Making new outfits will do that lol, started with just deciding what their sweets theme would be - Mitsuru was so obviously ube and buttercream that it hurts lol, and you can see there was a bit more deliberation with Ishida. Salted lemon, and he was supposed to keep the lattice motif - we’ll get there :P

Outfit designing! Ishida’s was a OHKO - you can’t see it in the final version since he’s angled away but his buttons are salt stones! And he’s also got asymmetrical salt “freckles” around his left eye :) Mitsu’s was a little over-complicated so he needed a second pass

But only a second pass! A chunky sweater with the swirls was absolutely the correct choice, and then since zippers don’t exist in the JD universe (lol) he gets buttons!

Finally they got their final version! You can see from the sliced version that originally they were meant to have three sections apiece for both limbs, buuut that ended up being overly visually busy, so I gave them two for their arms and three for their legs :) All the other posing and everything was pretty much perfect though! :D

This is the most correct version of their clothes for their cut-up frame; I was in a bit of a rush for the gif version so a few elements are missing, like Ishida’s aforementioned lattice design element :’D Just try to not look too hard at the final version for these details specifically lol ♪ Oh the foibles of trying to be speedy!

Technically not Requestober but I was inspired by my own idea of them switch-stitching their limbs back together lol - lemon ube?? I guess that might work...

Day 21 got a concept sketch before starting - Luci’s glares are very cute hehe ♪ I was sure I could push it cuter tho >:3c

And I was right! I called this an alt but honestly this was the correct choice from the beginning lol ♪ Long ears are so fun to pose, extra expressions! I had a bit of trouble with his arms, but I think that’s just a me-not-knowing-how-to-draw-arms-lately thing lol

Day 22 was also very close to the end of the page so I was a bit cramped! Their faces are definitely the most important element - especially considering RGeeBs has one here! - so I wanted to give them a bit of extra attention. I really like his sharp nose hehe ♪ And Hero’s hand doing the classic cartoony pinky-up with her white gloves ugh it’s so cute <3

They did get a very tiny fullbody sketch tho haha ♪ For how it turned out here, I’m doubly happy with RGB’s pose in the final! Especially his legs :D

Speaking of tiny, day 24 was super tiny!! I always draw the stick figures tiny tho haha, they’re such cute little pops of colour on my page :) I’m glad as well that I could make all the colours clean digitally - the colours got a bit mixed traditionally lol

Fun fact: Day 25 didn’t get a traditional sketch! It’d been too long since I’d drawn GLaDOS so I felt a little better to just have the references right there in the same canvas lol. My initial digital sketches are always a bit chaotic, lots of very energetic lines! It does make me all the more determined to make her design readable in my style >:3c

I started forgetting to label what day they were around day 26 haha, but I started with them side-by-side - I wanted them to show off their outfits a bit more but it felt a little stiff :P Obviously Sinister would be uncomfortable in heavier clothes tho, so I went with that thought ♪ Poor Stanley haha

The alt ended up taking it since interacting is way more fun than not! I haven’t drawn Stanley using sign language in a hot minute which is too bad! It’s very fun to do! He’s not going to listen to you Stanley, no matter what you do

Day 28 gave me a bunch of thoughts but since it was fairly open-ended, I wasn’t sure where to take it at first! Angst just has so many possible roads! Initially, featured here, I considered them getting caught - them in a police light was a very cool concept for my lighting-focused brain this season haha - but it still wasn’t quite right. Maybe because Ishida actually looks stressed, noo D:

The plot just kinda picked up from there, the idea of Ishida killing Mitsuru since they were caught, and then what I eventually ended up with - all while trying to fight against limited space and a not-the-best art day, just gotta keep powering through despite the obstacles!

But I did finally land on the idea I wanted the most :) Originally this one was going to have two panels but I couldn’t make it look right, switching back and forth between them :P I’m glad I finally got to it in the end! It was a struggle haha

Day 29 got Fellplates!Gaster! Heck yeah! :D It’s been a while since I’ve drawn him so I had to get back into the swing of it lol - I actually booted him on “April 1st” by changing my clock and then my internet refused to connect to certain sites?? What the heck is that about. Well either way, I got him! He is cute haha

I really was tempted to give him something to do with other Fellplates members, but the lack of references confounded me! Ah! You can probably tell which one was meant to be Alphys huh lol ♪ Him and his sense of loyalty ah 💔 Well, self-destruction is a common ley line for him huh haha

And then what I finally ended up with ♪ He has a slightly more open expression here, but I do like the somewhat sinister edge the final version ended up with :3c The backlighting begged for it!! And everyone needs cool backlighting haha

Day 30′s TSP/Portal crossover!! It’s such a classic idea, I am actually honestly surprised that this is my first foray into it - I’ve thought about it forever! I’ve drawn them adjacently! But this is my first time actually drawing them interacting?? How?? Well I’m glad I have now haha, they’re so- they’re just so them, y’know? Lol

Y’get a bonus because the idea of Stanley and Chell just kinda vibing in a test chamber and Stanley reacting - which you can see the barest of unfinished sketch there on the right lol - to having his Bucket taken from him, it was too good not to haha. Chell is indifferent lol

Day 31, last day! I actually drew this the night beforehand, very quickly thus the scribbliness haha. Sometimes that’s all you need, just to get the image out! You can see with the SFX, despite being noiseless in the final version, I was thinking of the static right away :) I’m quite happy with how it all turned out hehe <3

That’s all the general sketches from this year! A good solid mix of things! Very fun :D

[ruporas]

nightmares

[vargaslovinghours]

And never let you go ♥

Bonus without the overspill lighting:

[princyvish]

uhhh the kobylu furries/minks designs in a screenshot redraw... with a side of helmeppo :]

original screenshot:

I think I took one look at the rocks I drew and went. Yeah I'm going to wing it because the rocks in my redraw are NOT accurate to the screenshot 😭😭

[lacunafiction]

how do I get injured 😭 pls tell me

^Yes, but imagine 'whump' instead because I see you, Anon. 😌

I’ll explain how the MC can get injured below the ‘read more’ line, but I do want to stress that the physical injuries are just one aspect because some scenes can be creepier or more unsettling/emotional depending on choices too. It makes me so happy to hear that you’re enjoying the changes during replays. Thank you! :D

In Chapter 3, fully resist in the burning house nightmare to get the severest injury in Chapter 5 when leaving the woods. How much you resist relates to if the MC will get injured, if at all. To resist, you must keep selecting the ‘null’ and ‘nothing’ options until you are finally forced to pick an emotion.

I’ll let you discover the level of injury yourself and how your RO(s) react; it differs based on the injury, which is a detail I loved including.  💞

In Chapter 11, you will need to fail the reckless/cautious check when battling the vines by yourself or pick a choice that automatically results in failure. So, if you pick to hit them with the compass, to stomp on them, or to simply struggle, you will be attacked. Otherwise, miss a stat check of greater or equal to 59 reckless or 62 cautious or if you’re reckless/cautious just pick the opposite choice this time and act out-of-character to ensure that your MC falters. :D

This will result in another injury and unique page later on, not to mention these do come up again in Chapter 12 and will leave marks that will be referenced.

Bonus: This isn’t a injury, but if you want some drama and the MC falling and being threatened, you can pick to run away during Chapter 11. This will also trigger a unique scene based on friendship because someone close to you wants to help!

There are so many scene variations within that^ chapter; some are even based on items paired with romance routes, while others are based on friendship. I never wanted the battle to get stale. I hope you have fun discovering more! 💚

Please remember if you haven’t already done so to rate/review the game on the platform you downloaded it from, if you’re enjoying Fernweh. 🥰

TFS Patreon 🌲(New Patron Benefits and Pricing)

[heibon-hiroo]

C-ta could lead conversations however he likes if he wasn't a coward

[apocalypticdemon]

I voted

And now: back to bed

[keeps-ache]

had a really good pear today! also woke up nicely, so :3

[lenteur]

random thoughts about castaway diva, episode seven(ette)

(read more because i always get carried away lol and this post might contain spoilers)

We’re starting this episode with how the mom and dad met and it’s the most wholesome thing in the world

« He was the first person who tried to walk at my pace » i let out the biggest awww 🥺 lee uk is the definition of a good man.

I just want to emphasize on how extraordinary of a man lee uk is. He saw a woman who needed help, talked with her about it and was willing to throw his existence away and start anew for that woman. If that doesn’t show how much of a loving and strong man he is, i don’t know what will.

Bo geol being one of the few who isn’t afraid and doesn’t care about lee seo jun’s power is chef’s kiss.

I like that ran joo and mok ha’s « friendship » isn’t linear and has lots of complexities. Yoon ran joo was okay with mok ha singing for her, until the truth was out. She’s become wary of mok ha and sees her as a threat, comparing her to mo rae and thinking mok ha will take this opportunity away from her. Ran joo is letting her emotions get the best of her. She wants to come back and prove her worth so bad that now that there’s an obstacle in front of her, she’s panicking. I do feel for her because she was at a very low point in her life until she met mok ha. Things started to get better but now, she’s facing reality. She’s proving she’s a diva in the sense that she doesn’t want any competition. She fears going back to the dark place she just escaped from. But then, you have mok ha who has never shown any sign of wanting to take the spotlight away from ran joo. She’s a real fan and has proved time and time again how far she’s willing to go to help her idol. Sure, she wants to become a singer, but that doesn’t mean she wants to eradicate the whole competition. She just wants to live her dream. That’s it.

The heartbroken look on mok ha’s face 💔 you can see how much she has endured. She thought being on a deserted island was hard, well she might have involved herself in a situation that’s harder than that. It pains me to see her like that because she’s still a little bit naive. She has proved enough times already how good of a person she is. She even postponed her debut to become ran joo’s manager and help the singer reach the 20 million album sales goal. She already « wasted » 15 years of her life trying to escape from her father, and yet she still chose ran joo before herself and i think you can’t question her loyalty.

I know I make basically next to zero sense but i understand both women.

The dirty look mok ha gave that guy when he called her ugly lmao. How dare you say that to her?

Mo rae’s manager is a scumbag and I’m glad mok ha put him in his place. I’m just mad that everyone wants mok ha to feel guilty for going up on stage and singing. Life was already hard for her, you don’t need to another layer on top of everything she’s been through. Also, you can try to unsettle her but mok ha is stronger than that. I’M ROOTING FOR HER TO WIN THE SHOW!!!

Kang bo geol’s outfit is super cute in this episode and seeing him jealous? MY HEART IS FULL 💗💗💗

I mean how could anyone ever doubt bo geol is ki ho? It’s clear as day! Ever since episode one, they dropped little hints about who’s ki ho. It’s the little details. He cares and it shows.

It was heartwarming to see mok ha sing without hiding and thriving on stage :D Put a big smile on my face.

It's interesting now that woo hak knows the truth the roles are reversed between the two brothers. Woo hak wants to hide everything and Bo geol is tired of hiding and wants to live his life freely. Woo hak trying to make his brother choose the wise decision when bo geol has been suffering for 15 years is insensitive. Now that his memory is back, woo hak is trying to make the entire family follow his plans, just like he's been doing before. It's frustrating to see woo hak being the one making decisions when clearly, the one who suffered the most is bo geol. He's been through so much. It was bound to happen. He finally exploded and he's taking the control back.

NO MOK HA NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Don't go meet mr jung. It's dangerous.

I'll give credit where credit is due, mr jung is veryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy clever. That's for sure!

I'm sorry to my girl mok ha but meeting with mr jung was a dumb idea. I've said it time and time again but she is very naive and still has a hard time adapting to the world around her. She shouldn't have talked to him when she has a hard time hiding her emotions. Just like he said, mr jung was a police officer and can see right through her. Now the ki ho hunt can officially start. By the way, he could literally follow her right to her house and find the entire family just like that.

It's bittersweet to see mok ha give up her dream after meeting up with mr jung. On one hand, I understand why she made that decision. It is to protect the whole family after making such a big mistake. On the other hand, seeing her smile when she was on that heyday again stage was such a beautiful sight. She worked so hard to reach that dream and now reality caught up with her and she has basically no other option. I hope she can find a solution and live her dream.

I feel for mok ha because after all her efforts, one mistake made her give up her dream. She's already suffered enough. She feels bad for abandoning her friend (ran joo) and putting the family in danger. Poor girl :( when will this nightmare end?

Bo geol finally revealing his identity!!! YAY I CHEERED :D

It's good to see him finally getting rid of the weight he carried on his shoulders for so long. He's choosing to live his life as ki ho because he doesn't want to be scared any longer. He's Jung Ki Ho and I'm glad to see him embrace his real identity in front of mok ha.

I'm grateful to see bo geol finally show his emotions and be vulnerable. It was hard on him. I just want him (and the whole family) to be happy and live without having to worry about mr jung.

The way he cradles mok ha's head with such delicacy, afraid she'd break if he did it with more force. I. CAN. NOT!

THE HUG 💓💓💓 It's like a wave of relief washed over them. They finally reunited. The way bo geol is hugging her tenderly to show her he's there for her. And the way she's gripping her hands around his vest (idk how it's called) hard, afraid he'll slip away if she didn't. I offically can not handle all of that. (but yes i can, please add more tender moments between the two)

They're in their own little bubble.

What's with woo hak looking at bo geol and mok ha like that? Don't you dare, I'm talking to you woo hak, put yourself between them!!! I forbid you. You'll meet my two tiny fists in your face if you ever do that, understand?

The preview for next episode seems promising. Hopefully issues will be resolved.

I'm giving this episode a 8.75/10

[outfoxt]

i love :D being sick :D

[ruvviks]

Chapter >> 18 [x] Characters >> Lauren Dimas (oc), Matvey Dobrynin (oc), Mikhail Koshechkin (oc), Rogue Amendiares, Viktor Vektor, Vincent Mayer (oc), Vitali Dobrynin (oc) Total >> 8.0k words Warnings >> Alcohol mention, blood, brainwashing mention, brief transphobia mention, death, descriptions of dying (don't even worry about it), dissociation (sort of), injuries, violence

Vitali was dying.

He could see the sky from where he sat, the ink black void above Night City, turned all hues of blue from advertisement projections and the city lights down below. Could barely hear the alarm blasting through the building anymore, a comfortable ringing filling the space between his ears, low humming wrapping itself around him like a protective blanket as he felt himself slipping away.

Part of him had already known, in a way. Living on borrowed time- the bullet had killed him, and if it hadn’t been for Arasaka forcing a heartbeat back into him only minutes later he would never have opened his eyes anymore at all. Had happened nearly a year ago by then; yet somehow Vitali could remember it as if it had only been a few hours at most, as if all that had taken place since had been nothing but a fever dream and his brain keeping him trapped in a delusion in the final moments before his lungs would give out.

He struggled to keep his eyes open, the familiar voice nearby urging him to stay awake- bitter taste of blood in his mouth and his side burning up, pain gnawing its way through flesh and muscle and bone until it was so constant he could barely even feel it anymore.

‘The sky looks…different, here.’

Vincent chuckled and dropped his head on Vitali’s shoulder who immediately scoffed in return, surprised by his boyfriend’s reaction, and quickly took another sip from his beer.

‘You are- such a fuckin’ city boy,’ Vincent said, looking up and pressing a kiss on Vitali’s cheek. ‘No offense, ‘course.’

‘None taken.’

Neither of them spoke as they both looked up again, eyes trailing over the stars shimmering above the camp of the Aldecaldos stationed a few miles outside of Tucson. Vincent was right- Vitali had never left Night City far enough to be able to see the night sky in all its glory, and he had never known there was so much up there to see.

Oh, how Vitali longed to see the stars one last time.

At least the end was more gentle for him, now. No one hovering over him, hurting him, choking him out; no one crying beside him, failing to save him- tears spilled, wasted, over Vitali’s own shortcomings, his alone and no one else's.

‘We should come back here, sometime,’ Vincent quietly said, reaching out to take Vitali’s hand in his own and he gave it a little squeeze. ‘After- you know. We finish up business in Night City. Take a break for a while.’

‘That sounds lovely,’ Vitali replied and smiled at him; a smile that widened when Vincent smiled back and gently bumped their foreheads together, eyes fluttering shut as he breathed in deep, his lips brushing past Vitali’s skin.

He had not even gotten the chance to say goodbye.

A tear rolled down Vitali’s cheek, eyelids heavy as he felt himself sinking; no current pulling him down this time but his arms and legs were no longer strong enough to keep his head above the water, and he sucked in a final, shaky breath before the cold river swallowed him whole.

He knew what dying felt like.

Vitali had very limited childhood memories.

Early ones, at least; shrouded in a strange sense of alienation, a name that did not belong to him and a body turning into something he did not want it to be. Siblings, who got a better treatment than he had ever received; a mother who did not love him, who thought her oldest daughter was merely a doll for her to play with, to dress up and order around until she would grow tired and throw him out; and a father, who-

Who-

Well, Vitali was not sure anymore.

‘You’re bleeding, мое солнышко. What happened?’

Vitali refused to look his father in the eyes- not out of shame, but out of pure anger- still shaking on his legs as he stomped through the living room and dropped himself on the couch. He was a little out of breath, still; had run all the way upstairs rather than use the elevator in hopes to get rid of the adrenaline running through his system, but it had not helped him in the slightest.

‘Stupid fucking shit kids,’ he simply answered Matvey, who had put his work down and walked over to him to join him, sitting down in the armchair on his left.

‘Oy- Language.’

‘What? I’m right.’

‘What did they do?’

‘Called me names. Said I dress ugly.’

‘And then they punched you on the nose?’

Vitali huffed and looked away, crossing his arms in front of his chest and he pouted as he stared out of the window, eyes slowly trailing over the ocean next to the pier of Wellsprings.

Alright, perhaps he had landed the first punch this time- but could you blame him? All the little fuckers ever did was harass anyone younger and shorter than them, and Vitali with his ten years of age was no exception to that.

One too many times and he had simply snapped.

Matvey reached out and gently took Vitali’s jaw, tilting his head back to get a better look at his face; and Vitali merely stared back, counting the few freckles covering his father’s forehead and cheekbones as his heartbeat finally settled down.

‘It hurts,’ he mumbled, slapping his father’s hand away.

‘It looks broken,’ he replied.

‘Next time I see them I’m pushing them off pier. All of them.’

‘Hm. Good luck explaining that to NCPD. Davay- let’s clean that blood off your face before your mother gets home.’

‘HEY-! Fucking watch it!’

Vitali clenched his jaw and flipped the other driver off as he quickly maneuvered around the car, switching lanes and accelerating while ignoring the loud honking from behind. His other hand was tightly wrapped around the steering wheel, white-knuckled to stop it from shaking too much.

Not as if it helped.

The city lights flashing by were blinding- street light after street light and billboards and neon signs and Vitali struggled to keep his eyes open, the almost hypnotic pattern lulling him to sleep despite the adrenaline coursing through his veins.

He accelerated more, nearly subconsciously so, heart rapidly beating in his chest and breathing high up in his throat- a feeling he was all too familiar with, a near constant state of being in combat situations or right before an important meeting with some rich and influential client.

This was different, though.

‘Turn right here, getting close.’

Mikhail spoke softly, just loud enough for Vitali to hear, his usually calming voice only slightly soothing his nerves this time. He was sat shotgun- Eddie on the backseat with Rogue, Cato and Vincent with Panam in the car following suit- leg nervously bouncing up and down and hands clasped around his rifle to keep his tics at bay.

‘I understand. Listen, I- Yes, I understand.’

Rogue’s voice was starting to sound increasingly more annoyed with every interruption from the fixer on the other end of the line. Her gaze met Vitali’s in the rearview mirror; and she made a gun with her free hand and pretended to shoot herself in the head, rolling her eyes while moving her phone a little bit further away from her ear when the fixer raised their voice at her.

‘I get your frustration and I get that the Council is starting to lose their patience, but just give us this last fucking night, goddamnit!’ she replied, every last ounce of friendliness she’d previously feigned entirely gone now. ‘Vitali is here with me, we’re on our way to the location- gonna deal with it once and for all. One night, please.’

Once and for all.

The reality of the situation they had found themselves in had yet to kick in for Vitali, his brain lagging behind and struggling to catch up. But it was better that way; he did not want to, did not need to think about what that statement meant- despite already being fully aware of it.

Going to drink myself into a coma after this.

Charter Hill, Westbrook.

Vitali clenched his jaw as he entered the subdistrict and passed its university grounds, memories flooding back into his brain- memories of attempting to break in, memories of nearly getting shot by security while trying to reach Mikhail in their years apart. Perhaps that’s why his father had chosen to seek shelter there of all places; perhaps he knew Vitali still avoided it like the plague, heart suffocating under the weight of all the sleepless nights he had spent there looking for his friend.

Hiding in plain sight. Smart.

High risk, high reward.

Vitali had an intimate relationship with the concept, from his years in college with the fine line between his personal and his school life, to the operations he led at Arasaka Counterintel, to the gigs he took from clients and divided under his mercenaries.

His own office in Wellsprings handled a similar strategic approach. Of course Arasaka knew of him- of course they knew where he could be found, and of course they could strike at any given moment in time without any warning and of course they could level the whole building with the ground with a single press of a button if they so desired.

But with his front and enough finesse practiced by both clientele and employees- and most importantly, Vitali’s intimate knowledge of the APEX program- even Arasaka stood powerless in the situation, knowing there was nothing they could do without raising suspicion, without drawing attention to themselves among other megacorporations, especially after the fiasco with Grant Armitage.

As long as Matvey’s mercs had behaved, no one would have expected their hideout to be in the midst of busy Charter Hill.

Not even Vitali.

‘Fucking imbecile.’

Rogue’s phone call had finally ended and she exhaled sharply, exchanging another look with Vitali when he glanced in her direction and she shook her head at him.

‘They want you dead,’ she plainly said. ‘Think everything will solve itself when you’re six feet under.’

‘Are you going to kill me?’ Vitali calmly asked in return.

‘Gimme a good reason not to.’

‘I’m driving.’

‘Eh, that works.’

As stupid as the Council was acting, Vitali understood; grasping at straws, similar to him, except focusing on the one thing he had thus far been trying so desperately to avoid. As if it would matter- as if it would make any fucking difference- the insignificance of a single man in Night City had become overly apparent to him in the past few months and if anything, his death would probably cause more problems than it would solve.

Another right turn and Vitali slowed the car, steering to the side of the road and coming to a stop behind a traffic jam, cars long abandoned for obvious reasons- a road block, heavily armored trucks and SUVs surrounding the main entrance of the building Vitali needed to be at and mercs patrolling the streets.

‘Let’s go,’ he said, slowly getting out of the car as his eyes trailed the entire building. It stood detached from surrounding facilities, enough space between to prevent any collateral damage; if anything, an explosion would perhaps cause some of the windows to rattle, but Vitali doubted it’d get worse than that.

He glanced behind him and gave Panam, Cato and Vincent a nod, all three of them readying themselves as they joined the rest- and a hushed but urgent ‘there you are!’ drew his attention into the other direction, a surge of adrenaline nearly causing him to reach for his weapon before he realized it was merely Huxley jogging over to them.

The group followed her into an alley just outside of view of the roadblock up ahead. An already crowded place- Vitali counted six other mercs, five whose faces he only semi-recognized- and Viktor of all people, dressed in similar combat gear as everyone else.

The defeated, somewhat exasperated look in Vitali’s eyes merely made the ripperdoc smile.

‘What’s the plan?’ one of the mercs asked, and right at the same time Rogue placed three bags with explosives on the dumpster beside the group.

‘Some sort of fucked up déjà vu cycle I seem to be stuck in,’ she said, gesturing at Vincent and Vitali- but her gaze lingered on him specifically. ‘Thought our good friend the rockerboy used to be stuck in your boyfriend’s head, not yours.’

‘What can I say?’ he simply replied. ‘Suppose the parasite infected me.’

The plan was straightforward, essentially the same as the last two times- get inside, plant the explosives, activate them, and then get out of there before the place would blow. They didn’t have blueprints to work with, nor did they know where any of the supplies were stashed exactly; but Vitali did not worry about it too much, knowing all would be lost either way once fire would break out following detonation.

All easy enough.

That part of it was, at least.

‘Small teams,’ he said, ‘three or four people max. Rogue, V- you’re with me. These are all rigged to activate at once from a single explosive so planting them is enough- just get out of there fast, once they’re activated we have about ten minutes to leave and there is no way to stop timer from going.’

‘Can’t Lauren control ‘em?’ Cato asked.

‘Unfortunately not. Older models- specifically made for field use, keep runners at bay.’

‘Balls.’

‘We’ll be fine.’

Vitali stood back as the- for now harmless- explosives were split between everyone present, eyes slowly trailing over faces and mostly steady hands gathering supplies and reloading weapons. He wandered around the group- paused to place his hand on Vincent’s arm and give it a gentle, reassuring squeeze- and closed the distance between himself and Viktor, who conveniently turned his head when Vitali tried to catch his gaze.

‘What are you doing here?’ he quietly asked, crossing his arms in front of his chest. ‘This is no job for you, Vitya. Please just go back to office.’

‘And leave Mikhail as the only available field medic here? Didn’t think so.’ Viktor paused, inhaling deeply before placing his hand on Vitali’s back. ‘Wasn’t planning on letting you do this all by yourself, kid.’

Vitali wasn’t alone there. But he understood what Viktor meant.

‘Are you sure about this?’

Vitali scoffed and took a few steps back, accidentally bumping into some medical equipment behind him in the small interior of Viktor’s shop. He straightened his back again- but swayed on his feet, the alcohol in his system not mixing too well with his medication, and he couldn’t keep his eyes focused on the other man in the room.

‘There is nothing else left for me out there,’ he answered in Russian, widely smiling and spreading his arms. ‘You thought I was studying to end up as someone’s secretary? Become some- some random exec for a starter company in Watson? Hell, a fucking politician?’

‘Arasaka isn’t going to solve anything for you, Vito,’ Viktor interrupted him, slightly raising his voice. ‘What are you hoping to find? Mikhail? Your parents?’

He tightly clenched his jaw and closed his eyes when Viktor moved his hand to his shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze, the gesture somehow enough to make his heartbeat settle down again.

‘Maybe, yes.’

A delayed answer, the two words violently cutting through the heavy silence lingering between them. Vitali dropped his arms and scoffed again- though it sounded more like a sob- and turned on his heels to walk away, nearly falling over the same medical equipment a second time that night.

Curious how that worked. Being so trapped inside one’s own head that it would feel like loneliness even when surrounded by people, swallowed by the Night City crowds. Vitali was intimately familiar with it- and even in that overcrowded alley he could feel it pressing down on his chest, choking the oxygen out of his lungs.

At least Viktor is still here.

Vitali could not remember much from the last time they blew up a building.

To be fair, it had been less about the explosives that time, and more about getting Vincent’s cure- and Vitali had only been barely present for it, mind still a little hazy from the remnants of Arasaka’s brainwashing attempt while he’d simultaneously had to run around and try not to get himself- or others- killed.

What he did remember, however, was the adrenaline; the pressure and the gravity of the situation pressing down heavily on his shoulders and his chest, his heart nearly beating itself free from within his ribcage, and the slight tremble of his hands while he had fought his way back into the secret laboratories where they had kept him in their captivity, mere days earlier.

Oh, how history loved to repeat itself.

The same pressure weighing down on him, the same tension in his spine- the same clammy feeling on the palms of his hands and the same shallow breathing as he left the safety of the alley with the rest of the group and they split up to move around the building in different directions, to try and cover as much ground as possible.

‘What’s the plan, jefe?’ Lauren asked, her voice a bit crackled through Vitali’s earpiece as a result of the static produced by what he could only assume was attempted enemy netrunner interference.

‘Rogue, V and I- we’re taking the lower floors,’ he answered, staying low to the ground as he moved around some vehicles. ‘Hold out there while everyone else moves up to plant explosives. I can see at least nine, ten- wait, thirteen hostile mercs outside currently. Can you take them down?’

‘I can try. Stay still.’

A cold shiver ran down Vitali’s spine when Lauren took over his vision and he shakily exhaled, clenching his fists in an attempt to calm down. It’s just Lauren, no one else- kept repeating it over and over in his head as he straightened his back and peered over the car he was sat behind again to give her a clear visual on the entrance of the building.

The sudden zoom of his Kiroshis caused his eyes to water and he swallowed heavily, nausea bubbling up in his stomach as a sudden rush of panic washed over him- panic that vanished almost instantly the second he noticed the enemy mercs dropping to the floor one by one, Lauren’s enhanced quickhack rapidly spreading until the entrance was clear and Vitali could finally stop digging his nails in the palms of his hands.

It’s just Lauren, no one else.

‘Sick,’ Vincent said from beside him, very much unaware of the uneasy feeling nested deep within Vitali’s stomach and he glanced at Vitali with a dangerous shimmer in his eyes.

‘Let’s move in.’

The entrance hall was a large, open space, similar to Vitali's own office but significantly less inviting; if anything it reminded him more of the entrance back at Arasaka, front desk blocking most of the path to the back of the building where two wide stairs led up then curved around against the back wall, meeting each other in the middle.

The plain white walls and asymmetric tiles on the floor had a medical feel to them, clearly a remnant of whatever the place used to be before Matvey and his mercenaries had moved in- but with the blood pooling at Vitali's feet and splattered across walls and ceiling and corpses scattered about it felt more like a slaughterhouse than anything else.

His stomach turned as he entered after Rogue and Vincent, several mercs inside instantly directing their attention to them- but they moved quickly, using the front desk as cover as gunfire started and the deafening noise echoed through the building and bounced around between Vitali's ears, the ringing putting a near painful pressure on his eardrums.

He steadied himself on the counter, relaxing his muscles before pulling the trigger and firing a couple of shots in the direction of their attackers. Just gotta keep them busy- everyone else had by then surely already entered through the back entrance or the fire escape and surely they were already nearly done with planting all the explosives they carried with them.

He just wanted to get it over with.

They locked him up.

The thought creeped into his head without warning.

Matvey was still somewhere inside, trapped- and Vitali's aim was starting to get worse with every passing second, his heart nearly beating out of his chest from stress. A shaky exhale left his body and he pulled back, wincing when a bullet bounced off the counter right where he'd just been, and he made direct eye contact with Vincent-

And suddenly they were kissing, Vincent's hands tightly holding his face, teeth clacking together from the force with which he had leaned in and Vitali gasped for air in his mouth, stealing the oxygen from his lungs.

'Stay focused, alright?' Vincent said, his voice only barely audible over the noise surrounding the two of them but Vitali could hear him clear as day, as if they were alone, as if they were completely elsewhere.

'It's almost over.'

And Vincent was gone again, moving around the counter on Vitali's other side to close in on their enemies. Vitali exhaled sharply and moved into the other direction instead- moved around Rogue, gave her a quick nod- trailed along the side of the room, using the large planters and benches as partial cover while taking more shots at the mercenaries.

'Lauren, security details!' he said, reloading his gun; he was on his last twelve bullets, and had forgotten to bring any spare.

'Their runner's been isolated, got them in a corner,' Lauren replied. 'Security protocols shut down- automated turret system entirely offline, seems like they can't get access to the codes.'

'Any automated doors?'

'Oh, yeah, most of 'em.'

'Can you open them for me?'

'Sure thing, jefe.'

One thing less to worry about.

Of course Vitali didn't know if he was even still alive. There was no way for him to find out- had no idea where his father was being held, and wasn't about to abandon Rogue and Vincent when they had more important things to worry about.

But he could not let it go.

And of course his body betrayed him; vision going blurry to the point he had to lower himself to the floor behind a planter and rub his eyes, but that only seemed to make it worse. Could feel himself slipping again, just like back in that Arasaka facility- time and time again, each and every direct reminder of the megacorporation causing his body to lock up and revert back to autopilot, to rely on the carefully programmed killer instinct planted inside his head.

'Please, not now,' he pleaded to no one in particular, voice a little shaky as his eyes tried to find something- anything- to focus on. He could feel his heartbeat in his temples, behind his eyes; could feel himself losing control of the muscles in his arms, in his legs-

'Please, not now.'

Vitali's voice was absent, distant. Even to himself; had not meant it that way, but it had happened almost automatically so, as if he was too tired to make an effort to make himself sound nice.

'I know you're busy,' Vincent quietly replied, shuffling a little closer to the couch. 'I just- I'm worried about you. You've been doin' nothing other than this paperwork for several days now. And it's getting really late.'

He did not even need to glance at the clock to know it was far past midnight.

Vincent sat down next to him and gently brushed a strand of hair out of his face, finally managing to get Vitali to put down his work and slowly take off his reading glasses. He turned to look at his boyfriend; who smiled at him in return and gave him a soft kiss on his cheek, arms sneaking their way around Vitali's waist to pull him a little closer.

Vitali opened his eyes and breathed in, shaking hand finding his left forearm- and without hesitation he pressed down his fingers, hard, a sharp and searing pain rushing through his nerves and he screamed, clarity once more washing over him until he could finally feel his legs again.

Focus, V. Focus.

He reached for his gun again and turned around- fired once, fired twice, three times and he was out- noticed someone running in his direction and hurled the empty gun directly at their head before whipping out a knife and pulling up the sleeve of his right arm.

A split second of hesitation-

Before he deployed his mantis blade, the only one he had left, and he jumped over the planter to close the distance between himself and another mercenary and slit their throat with both the blade as well as his knife at once.

A risky move, but Vitali did not care.

High risk, high reward- the adrenaline surging through his veins was enough to keep him going, the energy enough to keep his head on his shoulders and not lose his cool. Completely in control of each and every of his movements, using his enemies as cover as he rapidly worked his way through them, staining his blades and clothes with blood.

'Most explosives are in place, Vitali,' Lauren said, right when he dragged his mantis blade out of the chest of one of the last mercs in the entrance hall. 'Just the ones you're carrying. Whenever you're ready.'

'Time to move!' he yelled, acknowledging Lauren's comment simply by shifting his focus back to Vincent and Rogue. The latter held up the bag with explosives she had taken inside; and then vanished into a side hallway on the left of the building, and Vincent and Vitali followed suit.

But the second Vitali entered the hallway, he knew something was wrong.

'It's nothing I can't handle, Vik.' Vitali's voice was quiet, a mere mumble, as if he knew it was of no use to argue with the man. 'I've had it for all my life, now.'

'That doesn't mean it can't get worse.' Viktor paused and put some pressure on the side of Vitali's leg, right next to a muscle- and it instantly cramped up, causing a pained involuntary whimper to leave Vitali's lips and he kicked his leg to shake Viktor's hand away.

It was so easy to push himself too far. So tempting even; Vitali knew he could handle it and if he wanted to get results, he sometimes simply needed to make the effort whether he liked it or not.

It's exactly how his leg had gotten worse over the years, just like Viktor had warned him.

And it's exactly how he was starting to lose control again the second they were out of the entrance hall, his brain suddenly catching up with him to the point he could barely walk straight and his head felt like it was going to explode.

'Honey, are you alright?'

Vincent's voice sounded miles away, as if there were at least four thick walls standing between them despite the fact he was right there. Vitali tried looking up at him but his eyes found no one, as if he was suddenly all by himself; but with a blink of his eyes Vincent was right there again, holding his face, hands ever so careful and gentle and Vitali closed his eyes, wishing they could stay like that forever-

'I suppose I'm scared.'

'Scared? You? Please.'

A scoff left Mikhail's lips and he gave Vitali a playful nudge before taking another sip of his beer. Vitali mocked the scoff and snatched the bottle out of his friend's hands, downing the rest of it in a single go.

'You'll be fine, V,' Mikhail simply continued. 'Being away from your parents will do you good, and- I mean, they won't go anywhere. Give it a week or two, then reach out again. And you will always have me as well, you know that.'

'In another district,' Vitali mumbled in response. 'Where I can't reach you.'

'Once I'm settled in I'll give you call. You can come visit. We have plenty of time between classes.'

Vitali opened his eyes, and he was alone.

Again.

A sharp exhale left his chest as he returned to reality, body bouncing back to catch him but he hadn't even been falling in the first place.

Where am I?

He frantically looked around, back finding the wall behind him- it was sticky and a quiet whimper left his lips as he moved away as quick as he had dropped himself against it, jaw clenching tightly upon noticing the large amount of blood splattered onto the faded green and white wallpaper of the storage room he found himself in.

His eyes trailed down the wall to the floor- two corpses, mercs, dressed in heavy armor similar to that of Arasaka guards, and beside them stood the bag they had carried the explosives in, only one of the packages still inside, waiting to be installed.

Vitali blinked, hearing static on the line through his earpiece; though he was unsure if it was merely regular interference or an actual problem he should be worried about. The familiar thrumming in his head was still there, endlessly putting pressure on his skull- as if it could snap at any given moment, as if he could fall back into the darkness of his own mind with a single wrong move.

Not the time to feel sorry for yourself.

Far from it, even.

Vitali bent forward and grabbed the final explosive from the bag, quickly unwrapping the small device from its protective wraps and he placed it on one of the empty shelves of the storage room, turning the centerpiece to click it in place and snap it to the metal.

'Last explosive installed, ready for activation,' he absently said, unsure if anyone could even hear him. Exhaustion was washing over him now; body pushed far over its limits once more and he rubbed his eyes in an attempt to wake himself up again, knowing if he would pass out now it would be over for him.

He turned back around, straightening his back and getting ready to leave-

No.

Not now.

A figure stood in the door opening, wearing a suit; no jacket, sleeves of his shirt rolled up and gun in his hand, and Vitali unwillingly took a small step back when his gaze met that of his father.

Now or never.

Something was different.

Something had been different for a while, now.

And as much as it hurt him he charged forward without hesitation, ramming Matvey against the wall of the hallway and reaching for his gun to try and get a hold of it- but Matvey was fast and smashed the butt of the gun down onto Vitali's elbow, making him cry out in pain and loose his footing.

He was kicked back, the force of it startling him but not enough to knock him off his feet and he regained his balance, balling his fists and readying them in front of his face. Matvey scoffed in return, corner of his mouth slightly pulling up- then dropped his gun and in that same movement threw a punch aimed at Vitali's side, which Vitali blocked with the inside of his forearm and countered with a solid punch straight in Matvey's stomach.

He grabbed the man's shoulder, digging his nails into his shirt and flesh and baring his gritted teeth as he kicked his knee up with all the strength left in him- once, twice, three times as Matvey coughed and his hands clawed at Vitali's clothes to try and get a hold of him.

This is it.

Vitali's heart was racing wildly in his chest and he saw nothing but red- though not from anger, but out of fear, shallow breathing making him light-headed and causing him to lose control of the muscles in his legs. He pushed Matvey back, balled his fist- swung at him and hit his cheek, knuckles colliding with bone and only partially healed scabbed wounds tearing open, leaving his own blood on his father's face.

You can just leave.

He could.

He could just walk away now, no one had to know- no one had to know he couldn't do it, no one had to know he’d even seen Matvey there. It would be so simple; so fucking simple, yet there he was, bending over to grab his father's gun from the floor to then raise it and point it at his head, steadying himself with his other hand.

'Vitali,' Matvey said, slowly raising both his hands in defense as he struggled to catch his breath.

'Shut up,' Vitali sneered back. 'Just- shut up.'

Oh, how his voice betrayed him.

The slight tremble as he spoke, the sob mixed with the words he tried oh so desperately to spit out as violently as he could. No amount of anger, no amount of hatred could mask how scared he was-

And the amount of anger inside him was not even close to being enough to be able to pull the fucking trigger.

A door opened behind Matvey- the stairway, several mercs coming out and Vitali readjusted his aim and fired at them, walking backwards to create more distance between himself and everyone else in the hallway.

But suddenly he was no longer on his feet, tackled into one of the rooms on his side onto the floor by yet another merc, appearing out of nowhere from the side when he had least expected it and the gun was no longer in his hand, skidding over the floor entirely out of reach.

Vitali grunted and swung his arm blindly, hitting the merc's head and effectively pushing them off himself. He grabbed their hair and held them in position as he turned himself around- readying himself and pushing them into the ground to smash their head repeatedly against the floor until their cries of pain faltered and their attempts to escape from his grip stopped.

He jumped back on his feet, well aware of the danger closing in; turned, and froze, the merc in the doorway aiming their gun at him-

But before they could shoot, Matvey grabbed their arm and pulled it down, shoving them into the side of the doorway as he pushed himself a way inside and smashed their head against the frame before letting them drop to the floor.

Two more mercenaries entered and Vitali charged forward, using himself as a battering ram to separate the two to get one cornered in the room and push the other toward Matvey. He deployed his mantis blade and slashed the merc across the chest, once, twice-

And then heard a struggle behind him, jaw clenching tightly as he quickly turned around to assess the situation, breath caught in his throat as he feared for the worst-

Matvey was fine. Snapped the merc’s neck like it was nothing, and the fight was over.

But Vitali hadn't-

BANG!

He swiftly turned back around, mantis blade moving up- slashing the merc’s throat as quick as he could, and he retracted the blade in the same movement, sharp and short exhale leaving his body together with the sudden adrenaline that had arisen the second he had realized what he had done.

But something felt wrong.

Very, very wrong.

And Vitali fell to the ground.

He was light-headed again; and confused, too, shaking hand reaching for his side as a tingling sensation rapidly spread through his body. Cold fingertips found his shirt- it was soaked, like on his first day at Counterintelligence when one of his colleagues ran into him and accidentally spilled their poor excuse of a coffee all over his suit.

He had never been able to wash the stain out.

Which is why Vitali had mostly worn black button-ups under his suit jacket ever since, with the exception here and there- which is why at first glance it looked like someone had simply just spilled their drink on him again and he wasn’t bleeding heavily from a deep gunshot wound a little bit below his ribcage.

The red liquid on his hand would taste nothing like a lukewarm latte macchiato.

The thought caused Vitali’s lips to curl up in a smile as he closed his eyes and rested his head against the cold wall behind him. The initial confusion had washed away and pain had taken its place, burning and eating its way through his body and locking up his muscles, rendering him unable to get up.

Fuck, I’m tired.

‘You’re bleeding, мое солнышко. What happened?’

Vitali’s eyes fluttered open and he saw his father, standing in the doorway- on the other end of the dark hallway, slowly walking closer, reaching out to pluck a cigarette end out of Vitali’s hair- gun once more in his hand, eyes fixed solidly on the dark, wet stain in Vitali’s shirt right below his armor.

‘Stupid fucking shit kids,’ Vitali simply mumbled in return.

Though he was not sure if his father had even said anything to begin with.

‘Explosives locked and loaded. Ten minutes until detonation- everyone get the fuck out of here while you still can.’

A soft sigh left Vitali’s lips, Rogue’s voice barely audible to him through his earpiece though he did not need to hear her to know what she was talking about. They succeeded; the explosives would rid the place of all resources and would leave the mercs defenseless and they’d have nothing left to continue their onslaught with.

Though with Vitali bleeding out on the cold, laminated floor right in the lion’s den- exactly what they had wanted from the beginning- he was starting to wonder if everything could have been prevented had someone just fatally shot him a little earlier.

He grunted and pushed himself up on his elbows a little more, using what little strength he had left in his legs to shove himself further up against the wall. He opened his mouth to speak- had no idea what even to say, but felt like he had to say something- perhaps to get someone to look for him, even though that was the last thing he wanted.

Enough people had died and gotten injured because of him.

And as much as he tried, not a single sound left his lips, words caught in his throat and only blood dripping down his lips. He closed his eyes again and dropped his head back against the wall, exhaustion washing over him; and it felt like a relief, for some reason, feeling himself slowly drift off into that dark void that had become all too familiar to him in the past year.

Sudden pressure on his wound caused Vitali to cry out- mostly in surprise, less so in pain- and his eyes shot open again, back lifting slightly from the wall as he reached for the hands that attempted to stop the bleeding-

‘Don’t struggle. Save your energy.’

What?

One chance to set things right.

A little late, in the bigger picture of things; Matvey knew he’d had plenty of opportunities to give up, to just walk away for good. He was no longer sure why he hadn’t- did not know what he’d been trying to achieve, what he’d been trying to prove, but it was far too late for that now.

‘What are you doing?’ Vitali quietly asked, his voice barely audible above the alarm that had started blasting through the building only a minute ago. His bloodied hands tried to get a grip on Matvey’s wrists, but he kept slipping, and a choked sob left his throat when Matvey lifted one hand to take Vitali’s earpiece out and put it in his own ear instead.

‘Does anyone have eyes on Vitali?’

‘Vito, respond-! T-minus eight minutes until detonation, I can’t control them from here!’

‘Vitali, are you still inside?’

Matvey slowly lowered his hand, time seemingly slowing down around him as his eyes found Vitali’s- one of them a little bloodshot, both a little hazy from tears and pain, each and every blink lasting longer than the one before.

‘Second floor,’ he finally spoke, reaching up to gently cup his son’s cheek with his hand and leaning forward to kiss his forehead before moving his hand back to the wound.

‘Third door from the stairs. He’s bleeding out. Hurry.’

Why?

Vitali could not force the question out of his mouth, tears rolling down his cheeks as his gaze wandered off to the window next to him. He could see the sky from where he sat, the ink black void above Night City, turned all hues of blue from advertisement projections and the city lights down below. Could barely hear the alarm blasting through the building anymore, a comfortable ringing filling the space between his ears, low humming wrapping itself around him like a protective blanket as he felt himself slipping away.

‘You got what you wanted, no?’ he softly said, turning his head back to look at his father, using the last bit of strength in his body to lift his head from the wall.

‘I was wrong,’ Matvey simply answered, unable to look his son in the eyes as he glanced at the closed door of the room, some gunfire nearby causing the hairs on Vitali’s arms to stand up straight.

‘Wrong.’

Mockery dripped from Vitali’s voice and he scoffed- and coughed, blood spraying out of his mouth as he struggled to find a moment to breathe, spots dancing in front of his eyes.

It all felt so stupid now. The grand finale, everything had led up to this- but his father had been wrong, and none of it had mattered one single fucking bit and now Vitali was bleeding out and dying in a building set to explode in less than seven- six- minutes.

‘Wrong about what?’ he spat, letting his head collide with the wall with a bit more force than he had meant for.

And Matvey hesitated, visibly thinking as his gaze finally met Vitali’s again; cold, gray eyes staring right back at him, almost as if he was looking in a mirror, and Vitali finally realized- and Matvey could not help but notice- just how much he had started to look like his father over the years.

‘All of it.’

In a way, Vitali understood.

From the moment it had first been brought up, Vitali had known he would not be able to kill his father if it had to come down to it. A weakness, and he knew that; the one family member who had always complicated everything for him, the only one who had not rejected him in the way the others had- and even with everything else that had happened since, Vitali had not been able to stop seeing Matvey as his father.

Another choked sob left his lips as he tried to move, pain burning through all of his muscles with every single movement and panic was starting to take over, breathing shallow and barely enough to provide him with the oxygen he needed and he knew he was starting to pass out.

‘What changed?’ he blurted out, grabbing Matvey’s wrist again to force him to look back at him- but the move caused him to collapse, body sinking forward until his father caught him and instinctively pulled him closer, one hand still on his wound and the other holding his head which rested steadily on his shoulder.

Oh, how Vitali wanted to push him away- how he wanted to punch him, to scream at him, to tell him how much he hated him for putting him through hell most of his life and for never being there for him and for never standing up for him or picking his side when he needed it, and when everyone knew that Vitali was right and Nadya was wrong.

‘You did,’ Matvey finally answered, his voice barely audible and Vitali pushed his face into his father’s shirt in return, staining it with blood and sweat and tears- balled his shaky hand into a fist and dropped his knuckles against his father’s shoulder, wondering how it would feel to knock it out of place but knowing it wouldn’t solve anything and wouldn’t even make him feel better.

‘Suppose I did, too.’

Vitali could only see flashes.

A door opening- people charging in, enemies perhaps-? Mikhail appearing in his view, though Vitali could barely recognize his face as if he was looking at his friend years after they had last seen each other- six, if I remember correctly- forced apart by unforeseen and unfortunate circumstances that could probably have been prevented but it was too late to change any of it now.

The pressure on his wound vanished and he opened his mouth to scream, sudden sharp pain immobilizing his entire body and causing his vision to go dark. He felt a hand in his neck- someone plugging into the port below his ear, checking his vitals- and another on his chest, moments before plunging a Bounce Back directly between the two halves of his tattoo, a mere inch above the long faded gunshot wound the bullet of the Arasaka guard had left him with.

It hurt.

All of it hurt, and the brief rush of adrenaline caused by the medication made him nearly bolt up, several sets of hands gently pushing him back against the wall. He saw Mikhail again- and Vincent too now, reloading his gun moments before turning back toward the still open door of the room and firing at something that Vitali couldn’t see.

He was scared.

Reached out for Vincent, but he was too far away; reached out for Mikhail, but he was preoccupied, hands steadily working on something Vitali could no longer feel, wound numbed by-

By pain? Medication? Fear?

Vitali’s hands were gently pulled aside, held tightly by his father who was still there- still right beside him, despite everything, as if all their years apart and everything that had happened since did not matter anymore and in that moment it genuinely did not matter to Vitali, a strange sense of comfort washing over him and slowing the rapid, panicked beating of his heart.

Time to go.

Vitali was lifted on his feet, supported by Matvey and Mikhail- and suddenly they were no longer in the room, the blinding lights of the hallways disorienting and making it even harder for him to see. He no longer heard gunfire, the alarm blaring through the building swallowing each and every other noise whole- though the humming in his head was getting louder and louder, canceling everything else out.

More familiar faces- Cato, Huxley, Eddie- and Viktor, hurrying himself over to them but pausing upon spotting Matvey, cautious look in his eyes before giving him a barely visible nod and taking Mikhail’s place at Vitali’s side.

Two minutes.

They were almost at the exit now. At least, Vitali assumed- although he could not remember going down any stairs, and he could also not remember where the exit was in the first place. His head felt heavy and he could barely keep his eyes open now, exhaustion once more washing over him like waves rolling in on the shore.

‘Just hold on, Vitali. Almost there.’

He couldn’t even tell who was talking to him.

One of his legs gave out and he sank through his knees, held up by the two men by his sides alone, each and every blink becoming more and more difficult to recover from as his eyes wanted nothing more than to stay shut. Another voice urging him to stay awake, and his feet were lifted from the floor, and he could feel a cool breeze on h

[the-pea-and-the-sun]

man i jsut remembered im like every letter except one of the lgbtqia acronym. when did that happen

[rebelband]

cks was making a cameo in my dream and then my alarm woke me up, so. well. okay.

[berryblu-soda]

Uhhh.. *walk out of moodle grades section covered in blood*

W-white streak in my hair but no stress now Trade-off, that guy's looking like a mess now Driving off the tracks, but I'm back and I've seen hell but this is a bit more my style I'm alive, I'm revived, I survived You surprised? Gonna cry about it? You should see the other guy i've returned and I've wa-

IM FREEEE !!!!!!!!!

[victorluvsalice]

Barenaked Ladies (w/Sarah McLachlan) - God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen / We Three Kings (Official Audio) by Barenaked Ladies (official)

Okay, okay, we can have one actual Christmas song on the Song Saturday before Christmas. XD And while I'm not usually a fan of the more serious/religious Christmas songs (give me either something funny like Straight No Chaser's stuff or a rocking instrumental like anything from the Trans Siberian Orchestra), I've developed a fondness for this one for one simple reason --

The first time I heard it on the radio, it sounded to me like two masculine voices and one feminine voice singing together.

Yeah, uh, I wonder why I'd be interested in a song that to me could easily be sung by a trio of people. :p Granted, nobody's voice in this song is deep enough to be Smiler's, but still. I like imagining Smiler pulling Victor and Alice into singing this with them -- perhaps not at a public karaoke place (Victor in particular would be waaaay too shy), but instead as a private performance for all their friends? Just gives me some warm fuzzies. :)

[versupital]

geeked up.

you fucked around and snuck him an aphrodisiac, so now all you’ve got to do is survive until the effects wear off!

content: smut, established relationships, bondage, edging, overstim, degrading, oral sèx, public sèx, exhibitionism, drüg/alcohol use, afab!reader, gn!reader on nanami, spit kink, masochism

incl pairings: kento, toji, satoru, suguru

word count. 8.3k

soundtrack 🌧️💿: sativa ft. swae lee

COCK THAT TEA / NANAMI.

A cup of hot tea. That's all Nanami had requested.

The lemon stimulant you’d mixed into the drink had made him wrap up his work early, clamoring downstairs, his eyes glassy with desire.

"Darling," he breathes out, staring at the floor, holding the cup in his shaky hand. "Are you busy?”

He’s so polite about it. At first.

“What ever is the matter, Ken?” you question, running your cleaning rag in slow circles over the dining room table, standing on your toes as you stretch across the surface. “I’m trying to clean.”

He nearly growls, eyes shutting and reopening with frustration. His fingers flutter at his side like butterfly wings and he takes a step towards you.

“I need to be inside of you,” he blurts, looking momentarily embarrassed before his face darkens, then he looks up at you with viper eyes.

“Right now?” you fake your surprise, walking around the table to stand in front of him. “But the dining room is so filthy…” You watch as his nostrils flare; he’s clearly taking in your scent.

“You know I would never force you,” he grits out, voice choked. “But also - mmh - p-pretty please?”

His arms come up, either side of you, and he moves to pin your body between himself and the table. He releases the teacup on the table and his fingertips grip onto the surface so harshly that his nails make tiny imperfections in the wood.

“My God, are you feeling alright?” you stall, pressing the back of your hand to his flushed forehead. “You look unwell.”

“I feel unwell, baby,” he says, tone serious and apologetic. “I feel like I might die if I can’t put my cock in you. That is unreasonable.”

Even as he says the words, it’s clear in his eyes that he doesn’t care how irrational it is. He wants to act on his urges so badly.

You rest your hand over the painful lump in his pants. “Is that so?”

“No, please don’t,” he breathes. “D-Don’t wanna lose my control…”

“You won’t,” you purr, slipping his zipper down. “You’re gonna be good and let me take care of you for once, ‘kay?”

His shoulders visibly slump a bit as the pressure from his hard cock is released by his unzipped pants. You take it a step further and dip your fingernails underneath the waistband of his Calvin’s, softly scratching over the blond happy trail.

“No, no,” Nanami’s head falls onto your shoulder, full body shudders coming out of him.

“I’m just trying to help, Ken,” you quip, rolling your eyes, moving to pull your hand out; but in the same beat his large hand clamps around your wrist and shoves it down deeper.

He jerks forward against you, a whine for help coming out of his mouth and landing breathily in your ear canal. You try not to shudder yourself, wanting to maintain the facade that you’re in control.

“Please, just take it out,” he begs.

How could you deny him? Your usually composed, control-taking husband is begging you for something. It breaks your heart as much as it nearly makes you cream your undies.

"Alright," you say calmly, clamping your fist around his shaft, squeezing harshly as you remove it from its barrier.

Nanami whispers gratefully in your ear - over and over - until it fades into moans, because of you sliding the pad of your thumb over his oh-so sensitive cockhead, spreading his precum all over the throbbing skin.

You have his heartbeat in your palm. You feel it racing faster with each stroke of your finger. The organ jerks in response and so does Nanami.

His hips begin to mindly grind back and forth, his torso rubbing yours, hardening your nipples and exposing your arousal.

You let his length slide in and out of your fist, and his hands grip onto your breasts like they can save him from ruin. His hair has fallen down around his head, sweat ruining his gelled style. He looks so desperate.

You'd only wanted to see if the aphrodisiac would remove some of his patience. He's always so kind, slow, gentle. You were writhing to see him lose control, have his way with you, rough you up. You’d hardly expected it to turn him this submissive and needy.

Fwip! Fwip! The sound of your top disappearing makes you gasp. You’d gotten too lost in thought and allowed him to get your shirt off, leaving you in just underwear.

Your thighs turn in on themselves, but they’re no match for his strength. It’s as if you'd let a feral panther out of its cage, his nails clawing at the waistband, threatening to shred it as his hips pick up speed.

On a whim, you release his shaft and put your palm to his tip, running it over the shiny pink skin. Nanami’s neck nearly snaps back. You rotate your palm over the tip and rip! his iron grip accidentally tears your underwear off.

He doesn’t notice, as he maintains his grip on the fabric with his eyes closed. He freezes in place as you violate his sensitive tip and the underside.

“Agh - shit, shit, nonono…” Nanami spits out.

Until finally he’s had enough.

In exactly three movements, he has your spine curved painfully against his torso, hand clasping a handful of your hair and pulling it against his chest, your shredded undies fallen somewhere on the floor. His groans in your ear are wet and raunchy, coming from the depths of his throat.

His cock pushes through your soaking ring of muscle, sliding through the ridges until it rams into your cervix. He has no regard for your pain level, punishing you even as tears brim your eyes. His hand cracks harshly on your asscheek, before scratching the sensitive skin and making you scream.

"My love, you feel so fucking good.” The lewd words leave his lips in an uncharacteristic way.

You want to roll your hips in time with his but he releases your hair and brings his hand around to cup your neck - faltering you as he thrusts deeper, the painfully solid cock violating your walls. If not for your pussy flooding the veiny organ, your entrance would be raw from the harsh stroking and lack of regard for your pleasure.

With a release of your throat, Nanami's hand moves to the back of your head and forces it down against the table, cheek pressed to the wood. You look at the abandoned drink at the other end. Now you’re watching as the cold liquid ripples through the teacup with each rhythmic thrust of your husband splitting you from hole to hole.

“F-Fuck, Ken, take it easy,” you whine, knowing it’s a full fib.

You want him deeper than he already is, cock bottomed out, heavy balls sticking to your clit each time he goes all the way in. Your internal organs feel like they’re being bent out of shape, pressure in your belly a bit painful, but mostly exhilarating.

“I-I can’t, baby,” Nanami grunts from above. “Your pussy has me so out of control.”

You decide to admit, in a sultry moment of regret what you’d done. Your pussy can’t take all the credit for making him this feral, can it? Nanami doesn’t respond much, but his cock begins to take it out on you.

His veins pop from his wrists as he pushes your head further into the wood, cheek squishing in on itself, muffling your sobs.

He moans in response to his new rhythm, grunting your name over and over, mixed with naughty minx, take me, feel good?, mhmm.

He hikes his hips at an upward angle and the new spot he's hitting is foul, causing you to scream so loud the noise reverberates off of the walls.

You put a leg up, knee to the edge of the table for stability. Your arms stretch across the surface and you feel drool trickle out of your mouth - your mind so fucked out that you can't even bring yourself to moan.

"Where's my spouse?" Nanami questions rhetorically, shoving a deep thrust in you while cracking his palm on your stinging asscheek. "Why can't I hear them?"

You swallow, trying to stop some of the drool, attempting to answer him but all that comes out is a guttural cry for mercy.

Nanami pretends not to hear it, and runs his nails along your pretty arched back.

His fingers yank your head in the direction of his old cup, “Be sure to look at what got you into this ordeal, dear. Stimulants in my tea, really?”

Your moans return when you feel the pool of fire deep within your belly, and Nanami feels you fluttering your walls around him in an attempt to fight off the orgasm. But he recognizes your moans all too well, so he drills his hips harder to push it out of you.

"Ken! No!" you cry, trying to hold it off, but just before you release he's spilling his own hot spurts into you.

You feel each rope hit the opening to your cervix and your cunt sends you into the harshest orgasm you've had your entire marriage; your one leg that remained on the floor giving out, leaving you to dangle on the edge of the table.

But Nanami's strokes show no sign of slowing down. You feel the veins in his cock drumming against your slick ridges, and his length remains solid.

“Mm, so much wetter now,” he notes, his cum nearly sticking his balls to to your clit every time he shoves his groin against your ass.

The noise that comes from your cum mixing together as lubricant is so nasty; it makes your toes curl as you lay on your stomach and continue to take the pain.

You’ll spend the rest of the evening begging him for mercy and not receiving it. When you think he’s finally done, he carryies you upstairs, telling you that he’s going to give you a massage to calm your strained legs.

But when you end up on your side as Nanami stuffs you full of kids for the sixth or seventh time, you realize the massage had been part of his plan, and he gives no hint that he’s near finished with you.

KNOTTY BOY / TOJI.

Toji had arrived home from work right on schedule. You'd been in the middle of preparing breakfast for dinner, the kitchen smelling of bacon grease and syrup.

He'd come in and given you a quick kiss, then disappeared to the back of the apartment to shower.

While he was gone, you'd finished cooking, and loaded his plate up with sausage, bacon, and eggs. Then, you plopped a tower of pancakes in the leftover space. This is when you ripped open a packet of honey from the gas station. You'd seen it on the counter one day whilst getting snacks and, you were curious to see if the rumors were true.

You’d felt a twinge of guilt as you drizzled the honey all over his pancakes and then hid your naughty work by covering it with maple syrup. It almost felt like drugging him, but you knew it wasn’t, and the worst that’ll happen is consensual rounds of sex. You’d disposed of the empty wrapper in the trash just in time.

Toji comes back from his shower with damp hair and oily skin, wearing nothing but a pair of basketball shorts that cling low on his v-line. Your chest heats in response, but you maintain an innocent smile as you pad over to him with his dinner.

He sits down at the kitchen table, ready to dive into your delicious meal with a thankful grunt.

"Not hungry?" he questions, noticing that you remain standing behind him, rubbing some of the tension from his shoulders.

"I had a heavy lunch," you lie. "How was work?"

Toji pokes his fork into a sausage link before bringing it to his mouth, "Hot. Annoying. Lil' bitch Shiu was moaning about his sunburn all day."

You giggle, observing the darker shade on Toji's skin from where he has the privilege of tanning instead of frying in the sun. He's glowing like a cinnamon roll coated in sweet icing, and you want to drag your tongue over his moisturized torso.

"Well, least you're home now," you kiss his cheek. "I missed you. I hate when you have to work such long shifts."

He sighs. "Gotta do what I gotta do, puss. Have ta'make sure you have everything you want."

"That so?" you coo. "There’s something I want right now."

Toji reaches for the cup of orange juice you'd poured for him, thick eyebrow raised, “Spit it out.”

"Have you ever considered letting me tie you up? You know, 'stead of the other way around?" The words are out before you can stop them, and you're immediately writhing in regret when there's silence for several moments.

Toji takes a sip of the juice, and then turns to face you. "Needy brat, you thinkin' about tying me up while I'm tryin'a eat?"

You tap your fingers on his traps, trying to build a shovel to dig yourself out of this hole. "Actually, I've been thinking about it all day," you admit. "I was just worried you might be too tired for… you know."

His fork pokes into the pancake stack. You’re overcome with a sense of urgency. The minute he ingests the honey, the timer begins.

Toji chuckles and tilts his head awkwardly, rolling his neck. "You know I would never let you go to bed without a couple of nuts, ma." He takes a big bite of the cakes. "Didn't expect that, though.”

"O-Only if you want, of course," you throw out quickly, suddenly more nervous.

Toji swallows and turns to wrap an arm around you, pulling you flush against his body as he sticks his fork back into his food. "If you're gonna be in control, ya can't backtrack. Gotta stand on business.”

You swallow, "Well, unlike you, I need your compliance because I can't just throw you around like you weigh nothing."

Toji's body shakes against you as he takes another bite of pancake. You know the effects take a bit to kick in, but you aren't sure how much time you have left now.

"Would like to see you try to throw me around, though,” he says before adding, “do ya even know how to tie a knot, lil’ girl?”

"Of course," you say, offended. "I've watched you plenty of times."

"Usually while you're already on your second orgasm and cockdrunk, but..." he shrugs, "we'll see.”

You part from him, allowing him to finish his dinner as you collect the ropes from the closet. You untangle them as you wait. You're buzzing with excitement, blood pumping through your ears and your cunt, as you can already imagine his large torso being pierced with puffy red marks from the ropes digging into his baby-soft skin.

You're just about ready to drag him away from the kitchen by his ears when Toji finally comes into the room, sucking leftover syrup off of his thumb, eyeballing you.

"Mm, did you do something different to the pancakes, puss?" he questions. "Might be a new favorite of mine."

You smile and shrug. "Nope, don't think so." 

He buys it, or if he doesn't, he doesn't press the topic further. Instead his eyes travel over the wooden chair in the center of your bedroom.

“Welp, let the games begin,” he says, holding out his arms as he releases himself to be at your mercy.

Around ten minutes later, his sits with his arms pinned behind his back. His torso is attached to the back of the chair while his ankles are bound to the legs.

“Well done,” Toji grunts, attempting to tug on the ropes and being unsuccessful in loosening the knots. “My lil’ brat does pay attention.”

You lean over him, putting your hands on his shoulders. His cock has definitely hardened by now, sitting pretty in his lap as you’d requested he take his shorts off before being tied up.

You watch as his thighs flex and his cock jerks up, tip glistening under the warm lighting in your bedroom.

“Agh, fuck,” he spits. “Show me what you got, dollface.”

You continue to stand, fingers linked together in front of you, implying you have no intention of touching him. “What do you mean?” you ask innocently.

“Brat, don’t piss me off,” he grunts, a vein in his neck throbbing as he tilts his neck, fighting harder against his restraints now.

You giggle innocently and bring your knee up to the meeting of his thighs, ghosting it over his light brown tip. “You doing okay there?”

His eyes flutter closed, beads of sweat appearing on his brow line just under his hair. “Fuck. Stop doing that shit.”

“Or what?” you taunt, knowing he’s trapped.

“Oh, I’m going to kill you,” he threatens, but he can’t help but let out a delicious grunt when you glide your knee up his wanton shaft - back down again.

“What is it you always call me?” you tap your chin, pretending to think about it. “Needy whore.”

“Fuck you,” he grits, fists balled up behind him. You see his fingers attempting to reach the bottom of the knot but to no avail. He has no way out of this and he knows it. You’re watching the aphrodisiac kick into his system in real time.

His pupils expand when he looks up at you. His cheeks are slightly pink, and his bottom lip is underneath his teeth.

“Okay, okay,” you say, rolling your eyes. You reach for the hem of your shirt and pull it slowly past your stomach, then over your chest. You shake your tits in his face, and he leans forward, snapping his teeth, like a shark threatening to take a chomp out of your flesh.

“Quit playing with me, Y/N,” he says sharply. “I’mma fuck you up. Bruise your little uterus so bad.”

“Would love to see you try,” you crack, pulling the fabric off your head and shaking your hair free. You know just how bad your hair turns him on, how much he enjoys nearly ripping it from your scalp as he delivers painful backshots.

He jerks against the chair, causing you to jump a little. You turn around and sit on his lap.

Toji’s entire body stiffens. “God, why is my shit so sensitive?” The sentence comes out breathy, almost whiny. Toji never allows himself to switch, but you feel you may have unlocked the ten percent of him that likes to be submissive.

“What did you do?” he goes on. “You did something to me - fuck.”

And the moment you'd come clean, you were already bouncing deliciously on his cock, watching as he squirmed against his restraints and cussed in your ear.

"You're fuckin' dead," he keeps saying, before giving up and breaking into a pathetic little, "fu-uck. Mmh, yeah, ride me baby. Gonna fill you up."

"No you're not," you say, noting how his cock begins to twitch and using your knees to lift yourself up and slide it out of you, leaving your cunt pulsing with ache.

"What the fuck - get back here," he growls. His arms pull against the ropes, and you fear at any moment they're going to pop.

"This is payback, Toji." You look at your nails and then sit yourself back down, facing him with your cunt touching his cock but not allowing him the pleasure of being inside of it. "All those times you overstimulate me, or edge me.”

You lean forward and kiss him on the nape of his neck. He howls, jerking his cock up against you for even the slightest bit of pleasure.

You're just about to drag your teeth across the prominent vein in his neck when a terrifying shred! sound enters the air.

You sit up straight and stare down at Toji in horror, but his face has twisted into a sinister, knowing smile.

"You fucked up, you know that?" he questions, and before you can scramble off of his lap, his arms are around your body, capturing you against his chest.

The next few seconds are a blur. Before you can blink or breathe, the tip of Toji’s cock feels like it’s inside your intestines, your back against your bedroom door as he fucks you against it.

“A honey packet like I’m some booty call?” Toji gripes, drilling his hips into you so mean, that all you can do is slap your hands on his back for mercy. “‘Bout to turn your pussy inside out, demon brat.”

“Toji! Please,” you cry, trying to spread your legs on either side of his hips to make it feel like he isn’t going so deep, but his cockhead is so slick and fat that it’s threatening to crack you open.

His body being covered in oil is not working to your advantage. Your hands are sliding off of him, until you finally give up and take your hands in his hair, and he increases his speed because of it.

“I oughta chain you to the bed with a vibrator on your clit,” he threatens. “Since you wanna play with me. Fuck. So fucking creamy, ma.” His head falls to stare at your cunt as his cock drills in and out of it, white substance layering on his groin and between your folds.

“I’m sorry baby, I’m sorry,” you whine into his ear, “o-ooh. Shit.”

“‘Sorry baby,’” Toji mocks. “Yeah. ‘M sorry too. Sorry that you ain’t gonna be able to walk for a few days. Hold on tight, brat.”

SHOOT MY STEAM / GETO.

"Baby, can you pass me my bottle?"

The sentence you've been waiting to hear for about thirty minutes now.

You're at the gym with your boyfriend. You've been resting on the bench, watching him do his sets, waiting for him to ask for his water.

Suguru knows you always mix in his electrolyte packets for him, only this time, you'd found a convenient aphrodisiac powder to put inside instead. You wanted to see just how hot and sweaty he could really get with it flowing through his veins while he trained.

Only one issue with that: you’d accidentally forgotten about putting it in there, so you’d taken a fat swig a while back and now you’re paying for it as you sit and watch him.

"C'mon, monk, back on your feet," he says, taking a deep breath after chugging some of his water. He places it next to you and then reaches his hands out to help you stand. "'M gonna lose motivation if you're not up with me."

You swallow thickly and force a smile, before taking his hands and rising back up to follow him to the weights. Your body is tingling, cunt ripe with desire.

You decide to do some lunges to distract yourself while Suguru works on the lat pulldown, and you stare with heat in your chest as his back muscles flex under the cut-off sleeves of his shirt.

You think about your nails sliding over the sweaty skin to incite dangerous growls from your boyfriend, making him fall apart as he pumps you full of dick. Your head spins.

You attempt to shake the thoughts away and continue lunging until he finishes his pulldowns. When he stands, an erection is painfully obvious in his shorts.

He walks over to you, voice low. "Well, I guess this means I'm doing good," he comments, pointing to his new friend, and then gesturing to you. "It's also probably because your legs are looking good, angel. Damn."

You giggle and walk to drop off the weights. "Are you gonna be able to keep working out with... that?" You’re mostly asking for yourself, because if you’re forced to sit here and watch him workout with a boner, you may combust.

Suguru glances at himself in the mirror, rolling his shoulder blades. "It'll go away in a second. It's just all the blood pumping through me."

You blink. Your self control is dwindling but you try to redirect your focus. "'Kay, well I'll be over here starting some squats."

Suguru nods and pulls you in for a sweaty kiss, "Alright, love you."

God, you wish he hadn’t done that. Now everywhere his body touched you feels like a thousand needles. You want to grab him the minute he attempts to pull away, but you’re frozen in place, the fuzzy memory of his sweaty lips on yours making your panties damper.

And the next twenty minutes are history. You watch as Suguru loses more and more of his focus, his painful erection never coming close to dying. He slows down in his workouts, his eyes lingering on you much longer than before. You even watch him blink harshly, attempts running futile at pushing away his feelings. Then at last, he comes to collect you.

Now, you know it's a little unsanitary to be laid out over the sauna bench, Suguru leaning over you as steam and sweat drip from his locks.

You also don't care. The lust in his eyes, the furrow in his brow from where he doesn't understand why he couldn't wait to get home to do this is making your pussy throb around him.

"Fuck me," Suguru’s eyes roll back as he brings one of your slippery legs over his chiseled hip, sides of his cock gliding against your internal ridges. “Feels too fucking good, monk.”

All you can do is whine in response, as the subtle curve in Suguru’s dick causes it to poke the squishy roof of your tunnel. Your arms are trying to hold onto him, but with the steam, the two of you are just sweaty, wet bodies gliding against each other.

His abs rub over your belly and sensitive nipples, and he takes in the way each grind makes you gasp a little harder than before.

"F-fuck, Suguru," you whimper.

"Hah - ngh," he growls in your ear. "Don't say my name like that."

"S-Suguru," you repeat, feeling his nails attempt to dig into your skin before his fingers slide over your wet hips. "Wanna feel your cum."

He shakes his head, slinging water all over your face until you’re envisioning it being his warm semen instead. "N-No, feels too good, don't wanna cum yet."

You continue pushing him. "Cum for me, please?"

"No," Suguru spits, the end coming out breathy as he tries to compose himself.

"Please fill me up," you keep going, knowing that he won't be able to even if he tries.

"Baby," Suguru whines pathetically, but his strokes have noticeably gotten sloppier, needier. "Y-You have to stop."

You shake your head defiantly, before you crash your sweaty lips onto his. You moan against his mouth, taking his bottom lip between your teeth, piercing pressure onto it. His lips part as he continues slipping in and out of you.

Your bodies roll to the side on the sauna bench and continue going at it.

“Can’t get enough,” he mumbles against your mouth. “So wet for me, angel.”

It’s not long before you’re practically shoving him off of you, pussy sore and swollen. But he keeps holding you back onto his cock, making sure you nut on him as many times as he is able to drag it out of you.

Then, after concerns about your time spent in the sauna, you wrap it up - even though Suguru still hasn’t cum himself. But that doesn’t remain the case for long.

You find yourself pressed against the wet shower wall not even five minutes later, only a curtain hiding the two of you from the rest of the people in the bathroom. Suguru keeps his hand clamped over your mouth, whispering in your ear how good girls keep quiet, while making it impossible for you to obey.

And when he finally releases his thick cum all over your asscheek, watching as it instantly washes away under the hot water, he’s sticking it back in just a few seconds later.

Your brain is mushed with ecstasy from the powder, so you hardly notice that you’ve cum on his cock twice already, still ready for more.

GUMMY THROAT / GOJO.

“Want a hit?”

Shoko coughs and turns her wrist to hold her blunt out to you. You sit beside her on the couch and shake your head, holding up the bag in your hand.

“I’m good,” you grin. Inside the bag is edible gummies, which you’ve taken two of, and can already feel your toes stretching.

Shoko nods in understanding and passes it to someone else, leaning back against the couch with her eyelids laying low.

You check your pockets for your other bag, which has libido gummy bears, not edibles. This is the bag you’d handed to Gojo, watching as he’d devoured three obliviously.

“Satoru, you know you shouldn’t have eaten that many,” you’d scolded, trying to play along.

“Relax, my tolerance is higher than yours,” he’d quipped sassily.

But now that Shoko’s party has started to slow down, people disappearing in spurts, others sitting in corners or on the floor because they’re stuck, you and Gojo are having a staring contest - and you know what it means.

His eyes are wide and his fingers are restless. He’s sitting next to Suguru, who’s naively engaged in conversation with a pretty ginger. You’re pretending to ignore Gojo’s clear body language that says he wants to leave so that he can scramble your brains.

You giggle as your head falls on Shoko’s shoulder. Your body feels like it’s lifting off of the couch as the THC begins to flood through your bloodstream. All you can do is grip onto your skirt as if it’ll ground you.

Gojo stands from where he sits and struts over to you, his blue eyes appearing to glow with madness. “Y/N, get up,” he instructs, his voice commanding and unlike him.

“No,” you huff, nuzzling further into Shoko.

“Have it your way.” He reaches down and grabs your wrist, yanking you off of the cushions, and you can distantly hear Shoko laughing as Gojo puts his hand under your thighs and lifts you into his arms.

“Hey-!” you protest as you’re now being hauled princess style, his fingers pressing bruises into your skin with just how harshly he’s holding you.

“It’s way late,” he says. “And you’re high as hell. We need to go.”

“You’re being extra,” you scold, bopping your finger on his nose before letting yourself go limp against him. “Y’sure this is about it being late?”

“No, it isn’t,” he admits. “Watching you sit there and play with your skirt is making me lose my damn mind.”

“But I was hanging out with Shoko,” you pout, and realize he is not taking you towards any exits at all. He’s walking you to the back of the house, near the laundry room. “Gojo, what are you-?”

“I need your throat,” he blurts suddenly, glaring down at you with a compulsory twinkling in his eye. “Happy now? That’s what this is about. Need it so fucking bad.”

You giggle. The air feels crisp and your mind is so free. The room spins and you still feel like you’re floating.

“Okay, but be warned that I have cotton mouth,” you hold up a finger matter-of-factly. “May be a bit dry.”

He reaches the laundry room and pushes the curtain aside. If you were more sober, you’d realize how incredibly risky he’s being, but since you aren’t, you don’t care.

He puts you down in front of the washer, and wraps his fingers around your face, squishing your cheeks and forcing your mouth to open. In the same beat, he tuahs a mean glob of spit in your mouth.

“There,” he whispers. “That should help. Now I need you on your knees.”

He uses his grip on your face to push your head down until your knees collapse and you land on them. He releases you and you look up at him expectantly.

“All this for some head?” you taunt, placing your palms on his thighs. “Not that serious.”

“Yes it is,” he whines, “might die if I can’t shove my cock between those pretty lips.”

He leans down and swipes his thumb across your mouth, flicking your bottom lip and making your eyes flutter. You’re looking at him but not quite seeing him, as the gummies in your system have you spaced out. Your limbs feel like they’re stretching. You dig your nails into Gojo’s pants and he responds with an unearthly growl.

Your face is shadowed immediately, and upon focusing your eyes, you realize there's a fat, peachy cock looming over your face.

You gasp, watching as it comes down and taps you on the nose, fleshy and dripping in precum.

“Satoru-!” is all you can manage to say, as his tip grazes your cheek.

“Open up,” he instructs, and you part your lips slowly, expecting him to shove himself inside but instead he leans forward and sends another drop of saliva down your throat. “Just making sure it’s wet enough.”

“Y- mmh,” you're cut off, because Gojo has rammed the tip of his cock between your lips.

You part your teeth and wrap your tongue on the underside instinctually, eyes fluttering closed as you take in his salty taste.

"Speak up," he grunts, “you were being so bratty a minute ago.”

"Ngh - no," you gargle around his girth, saliva filling your mouth and making it hard to breath, pouring out of the sides of your cheeks and coating his shaft.

"Look at you, can't even take all of it," he taunts, pushing his hips deeper so that the tip begins to push down your throat, making you gag, your mouth becoming wetter.

Your eyes are hardly staying open. With your brain being so mellow, all that you can see or feel or taste is Gojo’s cock as it pumps in and out of your throat, bulging through your neck.

“So gummy,” Gojo purrs, putting his hands on the edge of the washing machine behind you. “Throat fits me so perfect, baby, y’know that?”

You can’t respond but the moaning attempt you make around his cock pulls a grunt from him. You know he’s being incredibly loud and obvious, but you can hardly scold him. The most you can do is crack your palms on his thighs, leaving tiny hand-shaped prints on the smooth skin.

“Hngh - what was that for?” he scolds before murmuring, “do it again.”

You smack his legs again and keep your eyes closed. You’re salivating all over his length and it drips down your chin, which is being abused by his heavy sac in repeated claps.

“Quiet,” you moan around his cock, as he’s letting out the most pathetic, desperate moans while you drive your mouth down to the base.

“N-No,” he grumbles, lifting his shirt up, before taking it between his teeth. You’re met face to face his with his perfect abdomen, glistening in droplets of sweat. “You suck me up so good, princess.”

Your eyes roll in pleasure at the name, eyes watering, mouth no longer dry. You don’t care if he wants to wake up the neighborhood; you just want to hear the delicious, sultry noises.

But right when you feel his dick twitch against the sides of your cheeks, you force your mouth off and swallow down the pool of saliva in the back of your throat. Your lips are wet and puffy as you part them and stare up at him.

“Gah - baby, why?” he quarrels, gripping tightly on your head.

You answer by leaning back forward and kissing his tip, sticking out your tongue and flicking it over the head before backing up again.

His knees nearly buckle, his grip on your head tightens.

“P-please don’t,” he whimpers. “S-suck it.”

“Mm-mm,” you mouth defiantly, wrapping your lips over the tip and gently pressing your teeth down; should he try to shove it deeper, it would only hurt him.

“Ngh - ‘m too horny for this, baby,” he growls. “Was so close.”

“Too bad,” you shrug, voice muffled because of the way you’re swirling your tongue over his slick pink tip.

His head falls forward, white locks dangling over his face as he tries to fight through his unbearably high libido. Your high has started to wear off but you can tell it’s going to be a long night for Satoru.

“Alright princess, I-I’ll remember this,” he coos from above, trying to push his hips towards your face but ultimately hissing and stopping when your teeth clamp down on the meat. “Goddamnit baby, what’s gotten into you? P-Please jus’ le’me cum.”

“Maybe,” you hum, taking him out of your mouth and using your spit to stroke his cock. “How bad you want it?”

“S-so bad,” he begs. “I’ll do anything.”

“Anything?” you question, running your thumb over his tip. “Hmm. You’re in charge of cooking dinner for a week. Deal?”

“Ah - fuck it, just please,” he whines, writhing under your touch, barely able to get his words out.

“Cum,” you say silkily, sticking your tongue to catch the salty, white ropes that waste absolutely no time shooting from his shaft.

He twitches under your grip until his high has ridden out, but you use his cum as lubricant to keep stroking his poor length.

“Okay, okay,” he whines. “I-I’m good now, agh.”

“You’re not good till I say so,” you gruff, until his hand comes under your chin harshly, and brings you to a forced standing position.

“I said I’m good, but if you think I’m not getting you back for that - you’re a stupid little thing, aren’t you?” He swipes his thumb over your cum-covered lips, and then licks it clean, before cracking you on the cheek. “Now, on your toes baby. And be quiet.”

A/N:

I’ve been trying to finish this for forever bro wtf is wrong with me

I’m fighting demons (writer’s block)

And also… I think I wanna write some Gojo fluff after #jjk271 because my baby deserves love and light good fucking bye.

all the love always!

~pennjammin