#And it's not even the leaders' fault. Like I love and appreciate all those people and they are good people.

[thestrangestwatermelonofall]

Maybe if I tear myself to pieces doing the work over and over, then you'll say I did a good job. Maybe if I sweat and starve and bleed and break my bones, then you'll look at me and nod your head in approval. Maybe if I destroy myself in the process, then you'll be satisfied with the work that I have done. Maybe if I skip my break and work tirelessly, then I'll be done on time. Maybe if I work forty hours a week and maybe if I have an open availability and maybe if I answer your every call to pick up extra shifts, then I'll deserve the pay that I get. Maybe if I destroy myself and my life and everything about me and become nothing but a vessel for the physical labor ingrained in my muscle memory, then I'll be a good worker.

but I doubt it'll ever happen. And I doubt you'll ever be able to look through the place I've just cleaned every inch of and be able to say "it's clean."

[000marie198]

I love it how in the movies and shows, it is never explicitly mentioned that Hiccup and Snotlout are cousins but it is shown throughout the franchise in little moments so accurately that when you tell a fan they are cousins, there is zero doubt. Their whole dynamic screams cousins, whether it be them trying to freaking destroy the other in the funniest ways or caring about the other while still throwing around insults.

That aside, what I really wanted to point out is how similar some of their skills are. A proof they are cousins is that they share some very specific talents that most people on Berk don't have, talents that match in almost a familial manner.

You guys all know Hiccup's perks and personality and talents right? Well, lemme point out some of Snotlout's and see how they match his cousin's.

A strange combination of Loyal to a fault and Rebellious to a fault. This perk doesn't just apply on Snotlout, Hiccup is like this too but in his own way. It depends on the situation and person and their mood most importantly. Hiccup would sneak out to hunt for trolls and go into forest or try and train dragons or sneak out to go on flights when he's not supposed to etc. And Snotlout would trust and listen and have his team's and leader's back even if he doesn't seem to like it at points. He cares about his friends so much (seriously, go watch the entirety of the DreamWorks Dragons series)

Inventive and artistic. Snotlout works at the armoury at the beginning of RTTE, he also invented the sheep launcher. He's also pretty good at stitching. And I'm preeeetty sure he's able to forge his own weapons and armor now same as Hiccup.

Amateur writers who're actually pretty good. Hiccup's narrations are always fun to listen to and they also indicate that he has a knack for being a writer. In an episode of RTTE, Snotlout wrote a book that the gang found to be pretty good. And while Hiccup has artistic skills in drawing and painting and sketching, Snotlout is good at designing and aesthetics.

They both have a strange tendency to go and get hit on the head by lightning. Actually, lightning really seems to love these two.

Interestingly enough, Snotlout is also shown to be pretty persuasive and encouraging to others when needed, whether it be giving a scared kid a peptalk or talking some sense into someone who's being reckless and stubborn.

Tendency to plan something extremely reckless and crazy when there's a time crunch and those plans surprisingly work. Yes, both Hiccup and Snotlout do that quite often.

They love dragons! And yes, I'm aware that by now, the whole gang loves dragons but Hiccup loves them even more. He is obsessed with them and wants to keep them safe, he cares about these creatures so so much! While the other riders love their dragons more than anybody else but not as much as Hiccup, Snotlout cares about dragons almost in a similar way to how Hiccup and Valka do. He sings lullabies to baby fireworms and is so gentle with them. In The Eel Effect, he went into Hiccup mode with a terrible terror (just before he shook the poor guy but that besides the point) and was giving a speech to start a dragon revolution because he appreciates these creatures and genuinely believes they should be treated with full respect

That is all to say, even if it isn't directly told in the movie-verse, it is shown throughout that Hiccup and Snotlout are cousins and both even have some traits and talents in common

[mcflymemes]

PROMPTS FROM RED, WHITE & ROYAL BLUE *  assorted (and slightly adapted to suit this meme format) dialogue from the book by casey mcquiston, adjust as necessary

on purpose. i love him on purpose.

i've always thought of myself as a problem that deserved to stay hidden.

i'm going to have you offed. you'll never see it coming.

take anything you want and know you deserve to have it.

get in there.

you're literally putting your dick in the leader of a foreign state.

before you, i was all right letting everything happen to me.

i can't believe even mortal peril will not prevent you from being the way you are.

sorry, are we not? did i skip ahead again?

you've been warned.

he died as he lived: avoiding plans and sucking cock.

my life is a cosmic joke and you're not a real person.

hey, have i told you lately that you're brave?

i honestly have never thought i deserved to choose.

we're gonna make it work. you and me and history, remember?

if you finish that sentence, i'm gonna spend tonight in jail.

but the truth is, also, simply this: love is indomitable.

i actively wish for the sweet release of death.

yes, good, carry on.

i won't hear a word against it.

we're gonna do it together.

i said you look great, baby!

i meet you in every dream, and when i wake i cannot close my eyes again for ruminating on your sweetness.

i'm so in love i could die.

you can take your legacy and your decorum and you can shove it up your fucking arse.

i wonder if it's too late to swan dive off the roof.

i'm learning all your hidden depths today, sweetheart.

you must invent an entirely new system.

a curious thing about grief is the way it takes your entire life, all those foundational years that made you who you are, and makes them so painful to look back on.

he's proof that it doesn't matter where you come from or who your family is.

i've bloody well had it!

we can unpack the ironic symbolism later.

that's beyond our sense of decorum!

i'm not afraid of anything i feel. i'm afraid of saying it. i'm only afraid of what happens when i do.

aw, you do care.

if there's any legacy for me on this earth, i want it to be true.

straight people probably don't spend this much time convincing themselves that they're straight.

the moment you first called me a prick, my fate was sealed.

you are the absolute worst idea i've ever had.

should i tell you that when we're apart, your body comes back to me in dreams?

can you perhaps stop putting your sodding life in danger now?

what are we even defending here?

history will remember us.

when i sleep, i see you.

i hate this so much.

every person who bears a legacy makes the choice of a partner with whom they will share it with.

we're just gonna fucking fight.

he is my choice.

i can appreciate that maybe this isn't your fault.

i've been gay as a maypole since the day i came out of mom.

when i wake up in the morning, it feels like i've just been with you.

i can feel your skin against mine, and it makes every bone in my body ache.

your spine's a ridge i'd die climbing.

for a few moments, i can hold my breath and be back there with you, in a dream, in a thousand rooms, nowhere at all.

the phrase 'see attached bibliography' is the single sexiest thing you have ever written me.

i promise you, one day we'll be able to just be, and fuck everyone else.

give yourself away sometimes, sweetheart. there's so much of you.

i want to set myself on fire, but i can't afford for anyone to see me burn.

you see, for me, memories are difficult.

never tell me the odds.

i wish there weren't a wall.

jesus christ, it's like they can see into your soul.

you're it, okay? i'm never gonna love anybody in the world like i love you.

i'm finished. i don't care.

god, i want to fight everyone who's ever hurt you.

the whole world watched, and history remembered.

are you quite finished?

just so we're clear. i'm about to have sex with you in this storage closet to spite your family.

you insane, hopeless romantic little shit.

[oreo102]

Yaz is cool as fuck and people don’t appreciate her enough, a very long ramble

TLDR because this is so long: yaz is really cool and a compelling character and not enough people talk about how good of a character she is, both with and without the doctor, enough

In the first episode we learn as soon as we meet her that yaz wants to help people. She is tired of getting parking disputes and wants something more serious, and after meeting the doctor immediately starts helping her even if she isn’t supposed to be, and later it’s implied (I don’t think it was ever confirmed?) that she originally became a cop because one helped her when she had ran away/was suicidal, maybe?

Throughout season 11 we see her be the most empathetic/caring (episode 3 with the racism Ryan specially was facing, episode 6 with her grandma’s first husband, episode 7 with dan from kerblam, 8 with the kid who’s grandma was killed for “being a witch”, 9 with the blind kid), and is also very loyal almost immediately (“more of the universe.. more time with you!” “No. I’m with you, whatever happens” and more I’m forgetting)

She also has a very similar sense of justice to the doctor, practically immediately and comes to share her view on a lot of topics (she was hesitant to take the gun in TPOTD, she wrote wwtdd(which is adorable btw) on her palm, she defended Tesla, stands up to the master, once again more I’m forgetting probably)- hell, when seperated from the doctor without instructions/for a long time she takes 13s place as leader

Circling back to loyalty: she spent 10 months obsessively trying to find the doctor, she slept in the second tardis, she probably (I think it’s implied?) neglected her own health, social life, and job (if she still had one at this point) just to obsessively try and figure out how that tardis worked, to figure out how to get back to the doctor

And that was after she walked into a portal to an alien planet, not caring about danger because it’s what the doctor would do if it were one of them (she was already half way there by the time Graham finished asking who was going first, walking quickly and had a very determined look on her face. I really do believe if it had come down to facing the master or cybermen she would’ve to ensure 13s safety), which btw, is one of my favorite scenes in the show

And then s13. Gods I think I could talk about yaz in season 13 and those last 3 specials for days. A) Dan is more her companion than docs, let’s be very clear- they spent 3 years trapped in an unfamiliar time together with yaz acting as the leader (see above about her taking on the Doctor’s role when the doctor isn’t there to)

She handles 13’s outbursts and venom astonishingly well through the whole series but esp in s13, when she is double guessing her identity and even more unwilling to share than before, like it’s downright elegant that yaz is able to ignore 13s jabs sometimes, cuz personally I would’ve thrown hands. Although she doesn’t let the doctor walk over her, she doesn’t just accept the bullshit, she argues with the doctor quite a bit (telling her she is fully at fault for the situation at the beginning of s13 ep 1, telling her to stop leaving them all the time, shoving her when she shows back up after the 10 months)

As mentioned before the “what would the doctor do” being written on her hand is a really good touch and it does well to show just how much yaz looks up to 13 and how much she loves her (a very much amount, like infinitely)

This is getting very long so I’ll try to wrap it up somewhat quickly. Anyway, I really love yaz’s coming out scene (although I detest Dan outing her), it feels very natural and is filled with a lot of great emotions that we don’t see her have very much- like, she cries! Yaz, while shown having emotions, isn’t shown sad very often (which considering she was depressed as a younger teen and might still be, could just be her repressing those emotions) and is shown as scared much less, it’s nice to see those emotions on display

Speaking of emotions on display: “stop leaving us” is one of my favorite scenes/lines. Getting to see just how anxious yaz gets when the doc leaves, just how much she hates being separated from her, is a really nice insight to how she thinks- the doctor has already left her twice before (neither times were her fault, though) so who’s to say it won’t happen again? Easier to stay by 13 than to be crushed by her disappearing without warning

(Also side note but after that the two don’t separate much/if at all, showing that the doc did genuinely listen to her)

I’ve heard people say that they didn’t enjoy Legend of the sea devils that much but personally I love it- both because holy shit they’re so gay, but also because it again demonstrates that yaz is genuinely so smart and capable and there’s really no wonder 13 fell for her so hard (because she did. 13 fell so hard) I also like that this episode shows that the two play off each other and trust each other a lot, even if they aren’t always in sync

And finally onto the power of the doctor! Yaz’s best episode by far and my favorite of the entire series!

Yaz. Is. So. Fucking. Amazing. In this episode. She really shines so much which is saying a lot because she usually shines anyway. She looks so ready to punch the master if only he’d give her a reason, ready to shoot him (maybe not fatally… maybe) if he threatens the doctors or her own safety

She openly defies him, she leaves him stranded on a planet and if not for the plan she might’ve never came back for him, she flies the tardis! All on her own! We can assume that the doctor helped teach her but how much of that knowledge is from those 10 months? (I like to think that the first time yaz helped fly it was completely by accident)

Do the doctor holograms share knowledge? Cuz if not, that implies that she figured out it can change interface on her own and used it in their/her plan.

She saves the doctor! Multiple times! Runs out towards a fucking laser to make sure she’s safe (another favorite scene), she flies everyone home while the doc rests and recovers, she is just so cool in this episode!!

And honestly, I hate her ending. Don’t get me wrong, it’s fantastic that she survived, really truly fantastic, if they had killed yaz I’d have balled my eyes out and sworn doctor who off for a second time, but her ending? No.

I do not think she should’ve stayed with the doc, I believe she loved (romantically, she’d love every doctor platonically but) 13 only, she’d be traveling the stars with 14 or 15 but I think over time she would’ve slid into that grief, that the doctor is still there but hers isn’t. But just having to go back to normal life? Go back to her family and job and life? That’s bullshit

Graham and Ryan got the psychic papers, yaz could’ve too (which btw that’d make a fun spin off I think), or she could’ve gotten the doctors coat (which would’ve been the cutest thing ever), or even her sonic! (Least likely) but- nothing? Nothing? No!!

She and 13 should be allowed to be immortal space wives together (with river, maybe) and nothing bad should ever happen to them

[vasito-de-leche]

Ooooh, just saw your Self Aware!6 and I love how you portrayed him! You mentioned that he can hear the player, but not see them, right?

What if 6 encounters a player who has him as their favorite character (yk putting him as the main character in the interface), hearing them gushing about how 6 looks so handsome and how they prefer him over 37 and the people at Apeiron, mumbling about how he doesn't deserve the trouble, and actually rooting for him reading his event story? Basically just talking about him, unaware that 6 could actually hear them.

Anyways, I'll let you cook <3

;R1999 6 - Self-Aware AU (2)

Compilation of headcanons about how a self-aware 6 would react to a Player who gushes over him. Related to this Self-Aware AU post.

ty for your ask, nonnie! sorry if this isnt what you were hoping for, I cant exactly see a character like 6 enjoying this sort of treatment!

Right away, I think this sort of thing would make 6 extremely uncomfortable.

We know how he feels about receiving attention or being on the spotlight, how he prefers to stay by the sidelines and only put himself out there when others need mediation or whenever his people require him to play the role of leader--so to have a voice constantly praising and gushing over him would be really tiring. 6 is the type of person who enjoys--perhaps it's better to say that he needs--time alone, with nothing but his thoughts and some peace and quiet, after all.

Is this, somehow, his unchecked ego? Are these his own deepest thoughts manifesting as a voice coming from above, muddling the truth? No, that can't be. 6 knows that his self-esteem and opinion on himself is much more humble than this.

Once he finds out about the existence of the Player, he grows even more confused. Or rather, a bit more timid now that he knows you're watching over him, scrutinizing and observing each and every gesture, every little thing he says. He's your favorite character for reasons he cannot even fathom--not due to a sense of inferiority or inadequacy, but genuine confusion. Did he mess up somewhere? He's not supposed to receive this much attention beyond his contributions to the main story.

I think 6 would be indifferent to any comments about his appearance. His entire bloodline is praised for their unique complexion, this isn't new at all. Comments about how the Player prefers him over 37 or the people of Apeiron--HIS people, HIS community--wouldn't sit well with him, since they're people he cherishes and considers important, even if he keeps his distance from them.

Overall, treating him like this and putting him on a pedestal just further enforces those themes of isolation from the previous post, so to speak!

A much younger 6 would've definitely appreciated the support, to have someone in his corner, especially after losing his aunt to the Revelation. But I like to think that 6 as he is right now is mature enough to recognize the importance of everyone else's points of views. He, more than anyone, understands that he had his faults and that his actions should have consequences, and his humble and pacifist side would also lead him to defend the actions of others, such as 210, despite the previous tension between them. There's a reason his number represents harmony!

And because he represents harmony and perfection, I think he would just tolerate this for a long time. He's spent years in isolation, he's had people talk at him about things he cannot find himself to care about--this is no trouble at all. 6 would simply sit there, or go on about his day as you ramble about him. But I can see him wishing to be turned into a painting in the main screen as often as possible, just for a moment of reprieve.

The more you praise him, the less he talks.

For 6 to truly listen what you have to say, you'll have to talk about something that isn't him. He is curious, especially when he catches you murmuring about other things, such as your next strategy to win this UTTU Special Week, or complaining about the lack of materials to level up others.

I think what 6 would like the most is catching glimpses of the life you lead when you're not focusing on the game, when you complain about responsibilities and how eager you are to unwind by playing the game, when your pet interrupts and you stop playing to shower it with attention and love... These small, fleeting flashes of who you are when no one else is around. Aside from this, he would also love to hear your opinion on the events of the game, without this obvious favoritism for him--what do you think of the allegory of the cave? Do you ever wonder about your soul number?

These are the things that would get 6 to slowly warm up to the idea of the Player watching over him, that would get him to speak back to you one day, on impulse or on purpose. And only once 6 sees you as more than a distant voice, when you finally bond with him in a more meaningful way, perhaps your praise will actually mean something to him. Perhaps he will thank you directly with a small smile, perhaps he will ask you to explain why you feel so strongly about him, genuinely curious about your point of view.

But in the mean time, silence is a virtue.

[bugtoonz]

hii!! what headcanons do u have for the moonbase trio (362, 86, and 60)?

i always thought it was funny they were called the moonbase trio, bc isn’t patton stationed in like antarctica lol? anyways they’re super fun and i’m excited to talk about them!

for Rachel, i 1000% believe that girl lives on coffee. i know it’s like the equivalent of cocaine in the knd universe, but there’s no way she runs a worldwide organization of kids and isn’t majorly dependent on caffeine. that being said, since she’s also one of those said kids, she definitely piles it high with sugar and creamer. the sugar intake is probably worse for her than the coffee part😭 i also feel like she’s pretty tall. like especially now since she’s young, but even when she gets older i can see her being above average height. it’s definitely something she appreciates because it makes it easy to look down at people disapprovingly when they go against her orders. also, her and chad used to be super close. he was basically her older brother and the one that introduced her to nigel. since she’s soopreme leader, she’s aware of the teens next door, but Chad became somewhat distant after his fake-betrayal, and it’s something that really hurt her.

for Fanny, this is kind of random, but she’s definitely the kind of girl that reads fairy books about friendship and girlhood. she tries to apply what she reads to her real life, but for some reason it’s a lot harder for her to be kind and understanding than it is for Princess Sparklewand of Fairylandia. i also think that the reason she has an irish accent, despite having grown up in the same town as Sector V is because her parents are divorced, and she splits her time between Mr. Boss in Vermont and her mom in Ireland. it’s easy to do both when you own your own spaceship/aircraft/boat. her and her brothers all have her mother’s last name because she refused to change it when she married Mr. Boss and also refused to give her children his surname because she’s the one who had to give birth! it’s no wonder fanny is the way she is. her little brothers spend more time with her dad, though, which is why their accents are american. as much as Fanny bullies them, she’ll bully whoever tries to do the same to them 500x harder. she’s very protective of the people she loves.

i think Patton is really funny. he’s a total hard-ass that knows the KND rule book like the back of his hand, but also a total softie when it comes to his cadets. i feel like he’s from alaska. he seems rugged enough to be able to live there. i also feel like all of his time spent in freezing cold climates means that a trip below the equator might actually make him melt. Fanny doesn’t let him stand to close to her at the beach because she’s worried he’ll get his gross boy sweat all over her. Patton is also, like, super awkward outside of the work setting. someone get this poor boy an etiquette manual or something!! it’s not his fault he spends all of his time running drills and locking up villains. a lot of operatives avoid him because they always think he’s mad, but that’s just how he talks. he gets really confused when he tries to say hi to someone and they run away crying.

as for like their relationships with each other, Fanny has a huge, massive crush on Rachel that the latter is oblivious to. Rachel in turn sees Fanny as one of her closest friends, but also thinks she could maybe take a chill pill sometimes. Fanny and Patton have a sometimes-not-so-friendly rivalry with each other over which one’s the toughest out of the two. that being said, Patton is one of the few boys Fanny will tolerate, mostly because of his similar no-nonsense approach to work. Patton and Rachel are also good friends, and Patton has a lot of respect for her. when Rachel stepped up as Soopreme Leader, he was the first to back her campaign. Rachel likes Patton a lot, but he also needs a chill pill. it’s okay though, she loves her neurotic besties. (birds of a feather and all that)

[jemwolf]

I haven't posted much about religion since my mission because I've had poor experiences sharing about it online in the past, but it's conference weekend for my church, which means the leaders of the church are broadcasting a meeting worldwide.

(If you would prefer not to hear about it on the rare occasions I do talk about it, please, by all means, block the tags "mormonism", "ldsconf", "tumblrstake" and/or "queerstake"! I would not be offended in the slightest! Tailor your own dashboard and all that uwu (also like, I myself have the tag "religion" blocked, which i forgot about until i was confused about not seeing many ldsconf posts oops jgkdjfks))

I've never been super jazzed about conference because I have a very hard time sitting and listening to people talk for hours on end, especially when there's often messages that make me feel like I'm doing something wrong by simply existing, but I just wanted to thank those of you that are a part of queerstake. Y'all make me actually look forward to Conference. Even if I can't focus on the talks themselves, I love reading your commentary and interpretations.

Like many of y'all, I do love this church, but I can recognize the many faults that come from a church lead by flawed people and people who are unwilling to change. I hope that one day, we will all be able to see a church that accepts us for who we are and lets us be who we are and loves us like Christ does.

I probably won't say too much else other than maybe replying to some of your posts, but just know I love and appreciate you all 💜

[ramonag-if]

I lost track of this wip for a long time but I'm so glad to have found it again. Just finished my first playthrough since way back when this was just two chapters long and I am so delighted and impressed by the quality of writing and quantity of content! Also!!! I gotta gush about Salyra and Ahlf for a second.

You have made characters that are so flawed and so lovable in a way I very rarely see and it's fantastic! The more I learned about each of them and their interactions with the MC (many of which poor MC didn't even know about) the more I'm fascinated by them. So many of the revelations made genuinely hurt so deeply, Ahlf being the old leader of the blood guard, Salyra's new family, Ahlf never sharing her letters and lying about MC being happy and fine, Salyra's bid to fix the war by having a mixed race baby blessed by the gods, it's all terrible and my poor MC is heartbroken because these two people who should have loved her did such a bad job of it but she's also conflicted because she'd like to at least think that they do actually love her! They were trying to do their best while also being fairly self-centered people. The angst is so so good! And for all that I can fault these characters I can also kinda see their lines of reasoning. It makes sense that Ahlf wouldn't want Salyra back in his or the MCs life, both out of spite and out of real concern for the safety of his child cause like, who goes to give a baby god powers with the express disapproval of their partner??? You can't trust a person after that.

And while it sucks that Salyra has a whole new family now she's more than just the MCs mom, she's a whole ass person and so of course she continued to do the things that people do even without MC around, she continued to live and love and make questionable choices. It's shitty that she never came back, but the vibe I've gotten from both the game and your responses to asks here is that she was under the impression MCs life was better this way, that their life shouldn't be uprooted again, that they knew at least some version of the truth about where she was and how she was.

Never mind her involvement with the princess and the repercussions her counsel has had on countless people! She's so interesting and tugs my emotions in so many different directions. I pity her and I loath her, and I'm playing a character who loves her so much but is crumbling under each new revelation and it's so so good.

And oh my God another thing I appreciate is how consistent your characters are, even when it doesn't paint them in a good light. Salyra is described by many people as stubborn but stubborn is one of those traits that I often see written with only the positive connotations in mind. A character is "stubborn" but it always works out for them, it only chafes the other characters who are bad guys or antagonist, it's more determination and it's tempered and righteous and leads to good outcomes because "you should never stop trying, never give up!", but like that's not proper stubbornness. Salyra is stubborn to the point of ruin, she charges forth with what she thinks is best with what seems to me is little regard for the input of others and it appears to have gone disastrously in many places but she just. keeps. going!!!

I'm having so many feelings about these characters omg. I have so many questions! Though at the forefront is does Salyra even love MC or does she just love the potential she saw in them, the plan she had for them, the symbol they were supposed to be? This ask is so long and for that I do apologize I just wanted to let you know how fantastic I think this story is and I guess express my undying love for the way you've written Salyra, even if it does break my heart lol

Have a great day!

Thank you for finding your way back to the game 🌼 I forget that the game was at one point just a few chapters in and now we're a just past the halfway mark of the full game 😅

I'm really glad you're enjoying Ahlf and Salyra as characters. I never intended to make them this flawed or angsty, but as I wrote their scenes, their characters did become more than the idea I had for them and suddenly Ahlf was emotionally detached and Salyra was heading straight towards martyrdom. I like showcasing realistic characters, which is how I view Ahlf and Salyra. I've always enjoyed family dynamics that aren't always depicted as happy and perfect or the fights are trivial at best so this was a lot of fun for me to write such a complex and painful family.

I've always been stubborn myself, so I know that it can be more of a flaw than it can be a good thing. With Salyra, I based her on a lot of different leaders who would often be successful at rebellions but have really bad personal lives because they were so focussed on their ambitions that it got in the way of everything else. Salyra's best and worst quality is her stubbornness, it's what gotten her this far, but it's also what's ruined her personal relationships around her.

Salyra does love the MC, though you as a reader need to determine if she loves the MC because they're her child or because she can't separate the MC's existence from the plans she once had as them being a symbol of peace and unity 😅 It will depend on your playthrough and there is no right way to interpret her feelings towards the MC. As the writer, I can understand how she might seem to genuinely love the MC and how to others, she might seem like she's manipulating the MC or only loves the idea of them. So you'll need to ask yourself after weighing up her actions and words if it's enough to prove genuine love or not.

Please don't apologise for the long ask 💖 I enjoy reading everyone's take on the characters and the game. It's always my favourite part about sharing updates and the story with others so we can all gush about it together. Thank you for your support 😊

[cuiizhu]

Helios Rising Heroes - Rise on GoldenXXSection

Note:

This entire event story is an April Fools AU. None of its contents are within Helios's canon, but it does reflect the plotline of Main Story CH14 - First Storm and is best appreciated after reading said chapter. Go read it if you haven't yet, it's very good.

Chapter 1:

Akira: HELL YEAH! The Genius Idol, Ootori Akira’s back at it! Gonna work at Voltage Max again today! 

Dino: Good morning, Akira-kun. You’re as lively as ever~ perfect marks♪

Akira: Hehe♪ Ain’t that right~

Asch: Oi, greet people properly. 

Akira: Haah? I just did, and happily too! 

Asch: That wasn’t a greeting. It was just a big monologue. 

Akira: …Shit, don’t say things that ruin the mood. Even you don’t greet us all the time either.  

Asch: Aah??? Don’t fuck with me, shithead. 

Gast: Now now. Why don’t we turn the voltage down a notch instead of maxing it within the first minute of arriving at work, both of you? 

Akira: Gast! Don’t steal MY Voltage Max! 

Gast: It’s not stealing…. And anyways, where’d you get the idea that Asch isn’t greeting us? 

Gast: He’s more thorough than any of us, you usually just don’t see it. 

Akira: Eeh….? 

Asch: In the first place, you’re always arriving later than me. Know your place. 

Akira: Guh…..

Asch: For a rookie to do it this often…Do you want to learn this lesson the painful way? 

Akira: The hell, you wanna go? 

Gast: Oi, quit it…. Asch too, don’t let it get to ya. 

Asch: Hmph. 

Dino: Let’s just calm down you guys. Look, here’s the piping hot pizza that just arrived~

Akira: You ordered pizza again!? Everytime I come here, this agency’s always got pizza. 

Asch: It’s not the agency’s fault, it’s this guy’s. This pizzahead bitch never gets tired of ordering it day in and day out. 

Dino: I’ll never get tired of it! One pizza per day! Then I’ll be happy, and everyone will be happy! 

Dino: Definitely, love and peace…..☆

Gast: Ahaha, there it is. Dino’s inscrutable motto. 

Asch: Tsk, who’s ever heard of an idol that eats nothing but pizza everyday. …..How have you not gained weight? 

Dino: I won’t gain weight. In fact, it’s full of benefits for health and beauty! See? If you eat pizza, it’ll be love and peace …..☆

Asch: Stop shitting around…. speak like a normal person.

 

Akira: Dino’s supposed to be our leader, right? At first glance, he seems normal, but I don’t really understand…. 

Akira: Hm? Gast, whatchu lookin’ at? 

Gast: Our fanclub site. Subscribers seem to be on the rise.

Akira: Oh!? What’s that feel like !?

Gast: Take a look…our followers on social media are steadily increasing, and results from searchin’ your own name feels pretty great. 

Gast: For a while there were some rumors of member disagreements that’d pop up, but that’s calmed down since. 

Dino: Ahaha, there it is~. I think everyone’s realized Asch’s lone wolf persona.

Asch: Aah? This ain’t a persona.  

Dino: Is that so? Well, even so, it just means they’ve accepted who you are as a person, I’m glad ♪

Asch: ……Tch….

Akira: Ah! By the way, there was talk of using our song in a commercial right? Any updates on that?

Gast: Aah that, huh. That kinda talk…

Dino: That huh~ It’s a shame but it seems that’s a dead end. Apparently they picked another song last minute. 

Akira: Seriously!? Man, and I was so looking forward to it…..

Dino: There there…these sorts of things happen all the time, so don’t get too down in the dumps. There’ll be plenty of other chances soon enough. 

Asch: ….Plenty my ass? 

Asch: We’ve been like this since before the rookie’s arrival. We’re not at a level where these offers come handed to us on a silver platter. 

Dino: You think so? Between the conditions and power balance within the agency, so on and so forth—I think it depends a lot on those kinds of circumstances…..

Dino: But I think first priority should go to whether we fit what they’re looking for. 

Dino: “This is what I wanted! This is exactly what I was looking for!” —till we get those kinds of feedback, let’s keep giving our all♪

Asch: Tsk, if only the industry were so simple—

Akira: You mean, till you’re the strongest idol! Leave it to me, I’ll shut everyone up! 

Dino: Akira-kun…..!

Akira: Let’s aim to have the most fans in Japan, no, in the WORLD! Voltage Max!!!

Asch: Turn it down….

Masterlist || Next

[forgottenvalentina]

ODR House Test

SAMPLE ONE: VALENTINA FILLS IT OUT HERSELF (tho she's taken a truth serum so she's being 100% honest abt what she believes to be true)

House Mortain: (house of extremes there is no middle ground)

[ ] you always speak your mind (even when you shouldn’t) or you never speak your mind (especially when you should)

[ ] you love a good fight (or you run from them) 

[ ] you mess up everything without meaning to

[ ] you fail at life

House Arrington: 

[ ] It’s not murder if you say you are sorry first

[✓] you would literally do ANYTHING for the people you love most (even if that person is just yourself) 

[✓] your family is better than everyone else’s and haters gonna hate

[ ] you might be a little crazy

House Govida

[✓] money money money money money money money 

[✓] you might be royalty

[✓] your reputation often precedes you 

[✓] people look to you as a leader

House Beaumont:

[✓] most people underestimate you

[✓] you are gorgeous 10/10 would agree (even if you wouldn’t)

[ ] your mom is the greatest always listen to her

[✓] you find that your expectations and reality don’t always go hand in hand

House Wystan

[✓] Your parents are failures

[ ] You look around at your siblings and wonder how you are all related

[✓] You take control of your own life

[ ] You don’t care what anyone thinks about you

House Moran 

[✓] you look at your family and you are surrounded by idiots [malconaires]

[✓] life would be better if you were in charge of everything

[✓] your dinner parties are hella fine (it’s not your fault no one else appreciates them)

[✓] the reason you have no friends isn’t b/c you suck but b/c everyone else does

House Stafford: 

[ ] you have 1234031284038 cousins

[ ] there’s a high chance you are being manipulated by someone

[ ] most people don’t listen to anything you say

[ ] you have at least one family member who is a total psycho

House Fontaine 

[✓] lol you broke

[ ] you have that one really creepy family member 

[✓] you have fantastic qualities but can’t seem to actually lock down a man

[ ] ~sibling rivalry intensifies~

House Valles 

[ ] you think you are 10x smarter than you actually are

[ ] you have dead rapey eyes

[ ]  no one likes you

[ ] if you get married your spouse will probs murder you

House Barret

[✓] there’s that one family member you are 99% sure is secretly adopted [aoife]

[✓] your job is everything you don’t even know what a weekend is

[✓] you often pick up the slack of those around you

[✓] you know at least three people who would probably be starving/homeless/dead without you [malconaires]

House Meriet

[ ] you only look out for yourself

[ ] often play both sides in an argument

[✓] people naturally trust you

[ ] you might be an evil studmuffin

House Alainon

[✓] would literally take a bullet for your family [bio kids]

[✓] you always do what’s right and damn the consequences

[ ] you have sad puppy eyes

[ ] you have excellent survival and wilderness skills

RESULTS: godiva/moran/barret [SCREAM]

SAMPLE TWO: I FILL OUT OUT TRUTHFULLY ~FOR VALENTINA

House Mortain: (house of extremes there is no middle ground)

[ ] you always speak your mind (even when you shouldn’t) or you never speak your mind (especially when you should)

[ ] you love a good fight (or you run from them) 

[✓] you mess up everything without meaning to

[ ] you fail at life

House Arrington: 

[✓] It’s not murder if you say you are sorry first [or after! either one works ;D just convince urself its not ur fault and ur golden!]

[✓] you would literally do ANYTHING for the people you love most (even if that person is just yourself) 

[ ] your family is better than everyone else’s and haters gonna hate

[✓] you might be a little crazy

House Govida

[✓] money money money money money money money 

[✓] you might be royalty

[✓] your reputation often precedes you [its just not a ~good thing like she thinks it is]

[ ] people look to you as a leader

House Beaumont:

[ ] most people underestimate you

[✓] you are gorgeous 10/10 would agree (even if you wouldn’t)

[ ] your mom is the greatest always listen to her

[✓] you find that your expectations and reality don’t always go hand in hand

House Wystan

[✓] Your parents are failures

[ ] You look around at your siblings and wonder how you are all related

[✓] You take control of your own life

[ ] You don’t care what anyone thinks about you

House Moran 

[ ] you look at your family and you are surrounded by idiots

[ ] life would be better if you were in charge of everything

[ ] your dinner parties are hella fine (it’s not your fault no one else appreciates them)

[ ] the reason you have no friends isn’t b/c you suck but b/c everyone else does

House Stafford: 

[ ] you have 1234031284038 cousins

[ ] there’s a high chance you are being manipulated by someone

[✓] most people don’t listen to anything you say

[ ] you have at least one family member who is a total psycho

House Fontaine 

[✓] lol you broke

[ ] you have that one really creepy family member 

[ ] you have fantastic qualities but can’t seem to actually lock down a man

[ ] ~sibling rivalry intensifies~

House Valles 

[✓] you think you are 10x smarter than you actually are

[ ] you have dead rapey eyes

[✓]  no one likes you

[ ] if you get married your spouse will probs murder you

House Barret

[✓] there’s that one family member you are 99% sure is secretly adopted [aoife]

[✓] your job is everything you don’t even know what a weekend is [she sees this as her being great at being a ~ruling lady~ but her actual job is just screwing everyone else over and in that she is indeed ~tireless!]

[ ] you often pick up the slack of those around you

[ ] you know at least three people who would probably be starving/homeless/dead without you

House Meriet

[✓] you only look out for yourself [and her kids but partially bc she sees them as extensions of herself but she ~does love them selflessly so this one's a 1/2 to me]

[✓] often play both sides in an argument

[ ] people naturally trust you

[ ] you might be an evil studmuffin

House Alainon

[✓] would literally take a bullet for your family [bio kids]

[ ] you always do what’s right and damn the consequences

[ ] you have sad puppy eyes

[ ] you have excellent survival and wilderness skills

RESULTS: like rowena and helena and theodoric [rip kiddo], the lady's half arrington and half godiva [MORE SCREAMING]

[alectology-archive]

chapters 21, 22, 23, 30, 31, 32 partly:

Only three nights before, she had married Bael, in a ceremony that made her his wife and first-sister to his other wife, Dorindha. That part had been just as important as the marriage, apparently;

yeah, sentences like this make me think RJ really wanted to write poly relationships but was too enamoured with his kinks and obsessed with heterosexual relationships to do so. I’m fascinated, though, by his choice to make women choose other women as the most important people in their lives over even their love interests - min is the rare exception to this rule.

“Well, just you remember it. It was not your fault.” She heeled Mist on, and began talking to Aviendha before she was out of earshot. “I am glad he is taking it so well. He has the habit of feeling guilty over things he cannot control.”

once again, egwene Gets rand! and she cares so much! people who dislike egwene are fully delusional and probably base their dislike for her off of her characterisation in sanderson’s books. again, I feel the need to mention that egwene only ever admonishes rand in private in RJ’s books - and not even in front of moiraine! - but publicly insults him in front of world leaders in the sanderson books. plus rand undermines egwene’s authority and makes her look powerless in book 13 by walking into the white tower and demanding promises without offering any explanations. lol, sanderson has a tendency to write from a place of “Does this sound cool?” rather than “Is this a politically or logically sound action?”

ohhh and while we’re still on the topic of sanderson and bad characterisations and egwene telling rand that rand that it wasn’t his fault that the shaido ravaged Taien - rand makes a fucking point about trying to save as many people as he can! and blames himself for not achieving everything he sets his mind to in order to save people! part of the reason his mental health worsens as the books progress is because he can’t protect everybody around him despite trying his best to do so - this holds true at least up to book 11, if not book 12, and nothing really happens in book 12 to warrant a change on that note. so the fact that sanderson makes rand monologue something stupid about how he’d stopped caring for the people around him during his dragonmount epiphany infuriates me to no end. I just generally hate any of the new character flaws he introduces for all the characters. who asked him to do that 😵‍💫

[Rand to Aviendha] “Did you ever for one minute think that it could have bitten you?” he said. “Did you ever think of using the Power instead of a bloody belt knife? Why didn’t you kiss it first? You had to be close enough.”

they’re both so funny. yeah, avi and rand are also a similar kind of stupid, lol.

avi feeding rand the meat of a poisonous snake she killed is unironically the height of romance actually. and rand doesn’t complain, so I’m proud of him. anyway, I love her. have I mentioned that I love avi?

Aviendha sniffed at him in perfect imitation of Egwene. Those two women were definitely spending too much time together.

aw, avi is copying egwene’s mannerisms! back in chapter 5 she was also appreciating egwene and telling her that she was very good at everything she did <3 in chapter 22, we also have egwene stepping in to calm her down after rand yells at avi for nearly hurting him in the process of trying to kill a draghkar.

Aviendha appeared disappointed that he did not spit the stew out in disgust, though sometimes it was difficult to tell what she was feeling. At times she seemed to take great pleasure in discomfiting him.

sort of mat vibes from this, again! I think avi and mat could have been best friends if they’d tried. I’m honestly kind of shocked that we don’t see more of mat and the maidens being buddies except when he’s trying to catch their interest - because men and women can’t be friends, of course.

“You are thinking of Mat Cauthon?” She actually giggled. “Sometimes, a man gives up the spear for a Maiden.”

once again, weird mat gender moments! only maidens giving up the spear is really a thing in the books.

… he dreamed a dream of Min and Elayne helping him throw Aviendha, wearing nothing but that necklace, over his shoulder, while she beat him over the head with a wreath of segade blossoms.

wearing nothing but the necklace EGWENE gave avi? rand doesn’t know that egwene gave it but. anyway. more rand/egwene soulmatism, I guess.

Nothing after Artur Paendrag Tanreall, and nothing before Maecine of Eharon.

hello! mat’s memories have a specific limit apparently. but don’t the finn grant him memories of everybody who’s ever entered the redstone doorway? a bunch of rulers from mayene were using it pretty recently, I think? I need to look up the wiki later.

[Mat] He supposed that he would marry someday, settle down. That was what you did. A woman, a house, a family. Shackled to one spot for the rest of his life.

this is definitely another one of those mat things that are usually discussed in reference to female characters more often. and again, I vibe with the idea of him being allowed to be single - I think he has a lot of romantic tension with practically every character he interacts with, but I personally really relate to him saying he’s not interested in marriage. plus he just sounds so despondent about the prospect? I’m sad! very mat is repressed vibes too, because he specifically makes a note to mention disliking the thought of the two rivers having a lot of expectations about marriage, family etc.

“You are not made for spits, but for great honor, I think,” Melindhra said softly.

lol, melindhra and lanfear both try to get mat to step out of rand’s shadow and reach for honour/glory! and they both fail! I love mat. your faves want what mat has with rand - the narrative keeps goading him to become demandred 2.0 but mat consistently refuses to do so and manages to defy the narrative and some sort of potentially darker fate at least in that little way even if the prophecies mostly knock him down a bunch in the books.

It was being near Rand that got Mat into these things. All he wanted from life was some good wine, a game of dice, and a pretty girl or three.

hello??? three girls?? put him in rand’s polycule! again, mat is very repressed and in denial about his feelings.

once again poly vibes from melaine, dorindha and bael! the wise ones are betting on whether melaine will check on dorindha or bael first after the shadowspawn attack on the camp.

rand is wondering why moiraine didn’t come to find him immediately after the alarms went off - I’m guessing it’s because she saw a future in the rhuidean ter’angreal that said it wouldn’t be a good thing to do so.

rand is also showing a lot of restraint and being courteous! he’s not abusing the power he has over moiraine now - he briefly considers forcing her to tell him why she didn’t appear immediately but decides he won’t do something like that to somebody trying to help him. I think this is the section where rand is learning to find a balance - he’s come into a lot of power and is consciously preventing himself from abusing it.

This time he dreamed of Aviendha hurling fire, only she was not hurling it at a Draghkar, and Sammael was sitting at her side, laughing.

rand has the weirdest dreams about aviendha. what am I supposed to make of this.

I can’t shake off the feeling that avi would enjoy femininity if not for the way the wise ones sort of force her to adopt it? she genuinely enjoys exploring wearing wetlander clothes when she and elayne try to teach one another other about their respective customs. I just really dislike the line where sorilea tells avi that she has hips made for making babies - leave her alone. as a concept, I love the wise ones but I’m also irritated by their matchmaking and babymaking agenda.

avi and rand also do have a bunch in common - they’re forcibly expected to channel and are pushed into radically different lives from the ones they’ve been leading prior to rhuidean/rand finding out that he’s the dragon reborn.

[Egwene about Rand announcing he’ll hang chiefs who violate his rules about not hurting Cairhienin] Justice would do him no good if he found the others [the chiefs] turning against him as well as the Shaido.

see! she gets him!

He could waste an hour being soothed by the flow of a river.

Rand is so right.

When he doesn’t see familiar faces amongst the maidens who usually guard him, rand is constantly asking other maidens if they’re sick - it happened with joinde in rhuidean, and he’s now once again asking after adelin and enaila! I love this relationship sooo much.

Sitting on the stone rail of the wide flat bridge in the heart of the town,

area man sits weird again!

Elayne would have known what taxes were used for; it had certainly been more fun taking advice from her than from Moiraine.

I’m. I guess I agree about the principle of the thing I suppose, lol 😭

edit: help, this is also the book where we learn that two rivers folk are tax evaders! RJ is fully clowning on rand here, lol.

[Rand to Aviendha] “Do you have any idea how I will miss hearing you breathe at night?”

romance <3

He watched Asmodean from the corner of his eye, but the man only sat there, looking slightly ill. He could not know whether Rand meant to stuff that spear down his throat.

do I even need to say it?

ah, yeah, I did remember a weirdly specific fact correctly! avi accidentally taught rand the lesson of ~being hard~ when she told him he should have been harsher with the seanchan they dealt with. his demeanour completely shifts after that one exchange and he becomes noticeably colder - he’s a lot harsher with asmodean after this. insert tumblr post *having plot relevant sex with my thematically appropriate wife* (quite literally!)

And I’m only skimming chapter 41 but… there is so much going on in this quote. so much:

[Rand] He thought he could have been friends with any of the four, but especially Mangin, who had a sense of humor much like Mat’s. If he had no time to study women, he certainly had no time for making new friends. Little time for old friends, for that matter. Mat worried him.

I mentioned that a lot of mat’s personality was moulded as a direct consequence of being rand’s friend, but this is a lot! 1. rand loves mat’s sense of humour 2. rand makes friends based on that blueprint! hello, I’m crying. what does it MEAN that rand hangs mangin in LOC? is there some hidden symbolism there about how he’s left his boyhood behind? the hanging parallels are making me insane. does it imply that rand accidentally forces mat through a traumatic arc from books 7-9 the same way he can’t help but kill mangin for violating one of his laws? I will not be normal about this. local girl has been found dead on the streets!!!!!!!!

(I honestly skimmed everything from chapter 30 onward, I think, so there really was not much to say in this post - I never intended to really read much past rand arriving at eianrod, at most)

But I’ve officially finished rereading the parts I wanted to! I’d fully forgotten how the characters sounded in my head and I mostly wanted to go back and immerse myself in RJ’s writing style because I was not in a happy place after reading sanderson’s style in AMOL (literally to the point where I was wondering if I actually liked reading the series, lol). I think I managed to like TGS way better than I did the other sequels - but it kind of feels like TGS might have still been a mostly enjoyable read because he was piggybacking off of iconic plotlines that RJ had already set up and left notes for - but I’m consciously going to shut up about AMOL now. I only accept book 12 as canon at most anyway, lol, idk why I waste my energy yelling about the last two books at this point.

[taeminscoconuthead]

Hey so I made a script for a video and I want you to read to see if it’s good!

—

Imagine you was just minding your own business one random day, when you suddenly get a notification on your phone that Stray Kids’s Leader Bang Chan has past away at age 25. You’d feel devastated, alongside with all of his fans. Your bias just passed away and there’s nothing you could do about it. You’re seeing all the other K-pop fans with biases that are still alive and yet, yours are dead — never to wake up from his slumber again. You’d be grieving over what you would conceive as your loved one, since all you did was looked him until his very last breath.

Now, Stray Kids had to continue as 7. It would be a difficult number to grasp, but that’s the reality. There’s no more Bang Chan, and Woojin ain’t going to fill out this void — nor would he even be enough to take his place anyways. It’s already a hard thing to deal with, not seeing your bias in group photos anymore or even hearing him in songs. I want to ask you a simple question, does that feel nice to you?

But wait, here’s the catch.

Imagine now you just want to chat with people about the funny things Chan has done such as the infamous “you know what else is big” quote just for you to be stopped and be said “please don’t mention him.” What you said wasn’t even that disrespectful, you just wanted to say something that makes you smile, a harmless quote that has always made others feel good after a bad day.

Now you’re on YouTube. You just want to cleanse that horrible interaction by finding some funny clips of him, just to find his funeral videos being bombed to your face. It’s even unescapable — Tiktok, Instagram, Twitter and even Google Images. Speaking of Google Images, you can’t even search Chan’s name up without his death being plastered everywhere you go — even if you manage to find an innocent video would be enough to find the grieving comments sharing their RIPs to the late idol. Trust me, it isn’t just that post, but it’s nearly every single post that involves Chan in it.

Few months later, you had finally stopped crying for a day and decided to be more positive to continue this streak, so you go on social media and post something that you loved about Bang Chan — just for you to get harassing messages telling you to take down this post because “it’s disrespecting a dead man” and “how you should let him rest in peace.”

Now let me tell you again, does that feel nice to you? Me either, but this is what Jonghyun stans have to deal with every single day. We’re constantly harassed whilst having to go through the trauma process of losing our bias. We’re continually told not to do this or that and it’s giving us headaches.

Now let me tell you something, when will this end? Instead of telling us to let him rest in peace for literally making an appreciation post, when will you allow us to finally have our rest to mourn in our own way. This process isn’t as easy as you think, and people harassing us is making it even harder. That’s why we still have blingers that are still in recovery and haven’t yet gotten over it. Especially with the way he left this earth, you should especially be sensitive to us Shawols since maybe even some of them would think that it was their fault that he was dead.

Let this video be a reminder of the things that Shawols have to go through all the time and please be more gentle to those that are still healing.

Ayyy this is actually good and it also pictures how most of us feel. I like it, I think you should keep this as a script! (Btw I’m putting it as vent so it can separate from the other posts)

[lightningblade1994-blog]

{Sonic the Hedgehog/Juniper of Ebon} "Haily's Speech to Hiretsuna" {For © KatarinaTheCat} [Collab by © Lightninblade1994]

Haily:(feeling a bit distraught) I'm sorry, I'm so sorry... This is my fault we're all stuck in this... Andrew:(whispering)Hey, Hey... We'll always be there for each other, remember? You have nothing o be sorry for, alright? Hiretsuna: Hey! You be quiet back there! Andrew: ...Why are you doing this, Hiretsuna? Are you really that put out with me? Hiretsuna: Well, what do you think? Andrew: Sunny, you don't belong in this place, with Lancelot... Rosaria is your real home. Hiretsuna:(despondently)...Is it? Is it a place where I would be called "Murderer" my home? I've took you for a brighter person, Echidna. Andrew: So, that's it? You do all of this in spite?! Hiretsuna: I was one of the greatest mercenaries of all time, I was the best that there was, The most capable leader ever to be admired, until you've came along and all of that went to nothing!* I may have done more harder than you would've in your lifetime, but nobody appreciated what I've did and even lesser when you've started all the same tasks. Juniper:(glares at Hiretsuna) It wasn't that we didn't appreciated what you've done, It was this attitude you've had! Being great and all does not mean you get to shove it down everyone's throats. But you, you can be great...if you'd just help us. Hiretsuna: And why would I do that? Haily: Because that's exactly what any other friend would do. Hiretsuna: *scoffs silently* You shouldn't. Haily: You know, It's a funny thing... get to rule a whole kingdom for just one year, and you've learn quite a few things. You'd think you were never appreciated, Hiretsuna. But you're wrong. All those people in Rosaria; Friends... Family... Your comrades... Even your deceased mother that we'd forget to mention just now... They loved you. They loved how kind and sincere you were back then, how selfless you were when you've risked your life for them, how grateful you were to them. They adored you... They didn't even mind when you got worn out that one time, because of all the good you've ever done before. You are appreciated, Hiretsuna. Where is that kindness now? That good well? What would the others think if they saw you like this now? Holding a petty grudge. And for what...? [Hiretsuna remains slient for a moment; then begins to tear up a bit after the speech Haily just made; then pulls himself together as he grabs the key to cell] Hiretsuna: Alright... Come on, I'm going to get you all out.

[beyondthetemples-ooc]

I started like... mildly crying 20 minutes ago and I haven’t stopped.

It’s equal parts Good Feelings and Bad Feelings! But it’s a lot of feelings.

tl;dr helping a friend made me emotional, my stomach tormented me last night so I’m especially fragile, I’m insanely excited for QPP Moving Day TOMORROW!, and then I heard a leader in the org say “I celebrate the person sitting in your seat” and a bunch of other really loving, gentle, appreciative things and I realized how badly I NEED TO HEAR THAT, and how, for the longest time, I just didn’t.

Mild emetophobia warning for discussion of Feeling Bad, and emotional warning for what might amount to... childhood emotional neglect? Is that a thing?

I don’t know if I can ramble, my emotions are kinda threadbare right now. So, bullet points.

- I stayed up late last night to talk to a friend having a crisis. Staying up late alone wouldn’t have been a problem at all, I was happy to “make time” for sia! But

- RIGHT as I was falling asleep, my stomach hit me with Overwhelmingly Sick Feeling that escalated RAPIDLY, convinced me I was going to Be S*ck for 2-3 hours straight, and I was trying to fight the phobia down, I really was, but I couldn’t. I wound up laying there huddling and shivering, frantic for Literally Hours, until it finally decided to just feel sore instead, and I finally got to sleep.

( ^ That part is probably my own fault. I got Chipotle for dinner because I wanted to Do Things instead of cook yesterday, and Chipotle usually goes well. But then I ate the whole bowl AND the whole (small) bag of ships. Which I KNOW I shouldn’t do, my stomach can barely handle a SMALL meal! But I THOUGHT I was still hungry? And I felt fine, mostly just sleepy, Right Up Until 1-2 AM. And then it all hit me HARD.)

But even when it finally calmed down, emotionally I was in pieces. It Didn’t Actually Happen, but gods I really thought it was going to that whole time.

So between recovering from The Struggle Against Phobia Panic and not sleeping much, I’ve spent all day feeling low-energy and tired and wrung out.

So I’ve got this Emotional Torment right up alongside the “WILD INSANE EXCITEMENT AHHHH” because my QPP is moving in here TOMORROW, and I can’t believe it’s finally going to be REAL? We’re going to be here? Together? In this place that’s our own? We can see each other and hug each other and play games or watch movies together whenever our schedule allows? I can tell them goodnight in person?

I have so many starry-eyed feelings about this, I just. Fuck, man, it’s going to be life-changing.

And then I listened to a recording from a couple years ago. One of the leaders in the organization, probably one of my very favorite people to hear speaking, gave one of her heart-wrenchingly encouraging speeches. Encouragement wrenches MY heart, anyways. In a good way, but also in the way that makes me realize how starved I am for that kind of... just, love.

“I celebrate the person sitting in your seat.”

I’m just going to copy the relevant bits of the message I sent to my mentor and elaborate a little bit, because... I don’t have the energy to reword it, frankly.

I started crying a little at the part where she said "I celebrate the person sitting in your seat"...but I also think there's some underlying wounds that she speaks to. That part specifically made me feel so overwhelmingly loved and appreciated and part of the reason I started crying is because I don't feel that way very often. But I want to. I think everyone wants that, probably.

And I'm almost envious of her. I want so, so badly to learn how to edify and uplift and love on people the way she does.

It's especially hard because my love language is words of affirmation and I want to be able to give those words to people, but that's one of the times my throat just doesn't work and I struggle to get the words out. They're important and deeply felt, and for me big emotions are the hardest feelings to put words to. But I desperately WANT to. I want people to know I care.

But I want to learn how to give people those affirmations more often. And I don't think I don't do it at all, because last night a friend was going through a crisis and she called me and we talked for like an hour, and afterwards she said it helped so much, and today another friend...sent me a message saying they're having a hard time and could they please have some comfort, so obviously I'm making SOME kind of impact in peoples' lives. They must feel safe and loved if they come to me for help like that. But I forget that really easily.

This is probably one of those things that's going to come with practice, but do you have any tips for how to help people feel loved and appreciated? I'm not sure exactly HOW to practice telling people "I love you" and "I appreciate you". I haven't had many good examples of that being communicated in my life, so when I try to think of HOW to do it, I kinda just draw a blank.

Is it like that method you have about practicing feeling joy, where you notice the things that make you feel that way, and make notes of it, and then kind of take that and extend that to others? Or is this one of those things where you have to ask people point-blank, "What makes you feel loved and appreciated?" How do you shine that light and warmth on people?

All I want in life is to leave a positive mark on this world, and I think that's a pretty important way to do that.

But what I didn’t tell my mentor is, I spent ten minutes while I was trying to compose this message to feel my way through the pain that GL’s message brought up.

With the love I felt from it came the deep-aching realization that the reason it felt So Amazingly Impactful to me is because I don’t GET THAT much.

I so, so very RARELY am told “Thank you”, or “You made a difference”, or “I’m proud of you”.

That last one, I’m so desperate to hear that when my stepmother (OF ALL PEOPLE!) was drunk at my sister’s wedding reception and told me “I’m so proud of you”, I legitimately felt my eyes going wide and starry, and I tried to stop myself, but I couldn’t resist fishing deeper. “Really? For what?” (She didn’t have any specifications to that, unfortunately. “Just the person you are.” That’s news to me. It felt a little empty tbh.)

Like... I want to specify that my mother DOES tell me she’s proud of me, she encourages me, she compliments me, she gives me heartfelt praise and I can tell she really means it. But her and my mentor are probably my only source of that. I didn’t have those heartfelt conversations with her until I was about 19 years old. I wonder if maybe she didn’t know how to give me those shreds of affirmation, the same way I struggle to give them to people now?

Growing up, I essentially NEVER heard any kind of praise or thanks. The one and only thing people usually praised me for was “You’re so smart”, but even that was usually the backhanded-compliment prefix to a following “But if only you were better at being smart!” (Gifted kid complex, anyone?)

I used to write in my diary when I was in elementary school that “nobody loves me”. I wasn’t being melodramatic or exaggerating, that was genuinely what it felt like sometimes. I felt unappreciated and unloved. I would be told “Love you!” before bed and that was about it. I still drank up those 2-to-3 word statements and cried the one time my stepmother didn’t tell me that. But I was starved of any genuine praise rooted in sincere appreciation or pride or joy.

Maybe I got a “You did so well!” after doing a solo piece in a choir concert, or giving a speech at a school function. But when I stopped performing on a stage around age 12, I stopped getting even that.

That was when I started sharing my stories. When I started posting my fanfictions, I was so incredibly over-the-moon ELATED whenever someone posted a nice comment that I responded to Every Single Individual One with a private message giving them my heartfelt thanks. And if they were anonymous, I responded in the story’s next chapter.

And the thing that hurts so much about this NOW is... I desperately, really, truly, needfully Want to Tell People I Love and Appreciate Them. But I don’t have any examples. I don’t know how. I wasn’t taught the language of positivity growing up, and I wasn’t shown how to be vulnerable enough to be sincerely grateful and happy for someone.

I don’t want to make people feel unloved or unappreciated the way I felt growing up. I don’t EVER want someone to think I take their love for granted. I never, ever EVER want to make people think they’re unworthy or failures or even just “nothing special”. Especially the people I love.

One of my biggest “angst” points when I was a kid relentlessly controlling my emotions was lamenting that the people around me felt unloved. I thought that was my own fault. I didn’t realize that’s something you’re taught, just like sewing and cooking and writing. I thought I was broken somehow, that I had permanently removed my own ability to feel and show love.

That wasn’t the case. That wasn’t EVER the case. I never stopped being compassionate; I never stopped holding my friends very near and dear to my heart. I never (well, almost never) became cruel. I always had love, it just felt trapped inside me. I didn’t know how to release it.

I still don’t. And that makes me sad because the people in my life, even the random people I talk to on the street, deserve to feel loved and deserve to know they’re appreciated and important and deserve that genuine connection. They deserve encouragement and praise.

And the people I love most... My boyfriend, my friends, my mother? I so, so desperately mourn for the fact that I can’t bear my whole heart. I don’t know how to share the immense well of love with them when it’s locked up.

I wish I knew how to tell people, “I love and appreciate you.”

I’m trying to learn, but it doesn’t feel like it’s enough. Does it matter? Does it make a difference? Do people know I love them?

(Don’t try to eliminate all emotion from yourself for 10+ years, kids. It makes you insecure about what you show, what you CAN show, and it makes it harder to connect with the hearts around you.)

There was more, it is a deep wound, but I’m running out of steam... I might be all cried out now. I’m not sure.

Anyways, I’m going to go catch up on Broken Youth because I don’t know what to do with these emotions and maybe that’ll make me cry more and get it out.

[maneaterwithtail]

[QUOTE="Psyga315, post: 102141879, member: 341852"]

It's so ironic that you're bashing Fate for being woke but you're putting RWBY on a higher pedestal.

[/QUOTE]

I'm just happy I'm just happy we stopped the suppression/gaslighting campaign that there is no wokeness/problem with how some issues are presented and the audience is being treated as a whole that doesn't necessarily make every objection to the idea or progressive cultural values good but I'm just happy that we finally stopped suppressing it it's like when you're actually talking about what the issue is about rather than really mouthing a rationalization that you have to constantly engaging because no other method is allowed

That said it's arguably be cuz with that sense of fear that has made some of the more attempting to be progressive series so terrible

Take RWBY arguably season 9 should be a reflection season but it should be one where the characters actually pick up their genuine mistakes look at them decide what they did wrong and what they're going to do right in the end

Even if those are mistakes we can't fault them for it's not a bad leader that reflects on failure quite the opposite even if that failure has no fault to it because they are dedicated to doing the right thing and improving themselves and the people that they are trying to lead

The same as The same as even though I know he's completely wrong I'm okay with the blow up at ruby by John or even ruby at her team because at this point she's at the end of her rope she doesn't know what to do and she doesn't understand why the hell she has to do it and she's reached this breaking point much further after everyone else long has

The problem is the artificiality in order to make all of this happen as well as try to give it weight rather than just organically have the characters talk reflect understand each other and grow

The only thing that's kind of sort of organic is John and his involved time travel

With the upcoming season of arcane I really appreciate the fact that we have what is arguably a very progressive story where the drive is between women at the very least we have sexuality and sexual orientation not assume to be traditional and straight

But it doesn't stop on a simple team Jersey ra ra. it's hard to say who the bad guy is in all of this and even if there is a very obvious evil from say a traditional easy to have straw man such as the rich elite you then have to sit down and go okay so how do they fix it and suddenly you're hit with the fact that it's not as easy as kill the rich elite

The one character that acts upon this direct and with no regard to anything else is banana nut crazy

Wait Wait the 2 characters. 1 is called out as immature and damaging the very things she's fighting for and the other is banana nut crazy.

the one who pretends to is an exploitive drug dealing hypocritical groomer Desperate for all the things he envies in others and ultimately only comes to realize what his true goal should have been for the beginning after he's destroyed itOut of the same supposed love that's been driving all of his exploitation.

This is because This is because it's genuinely being political and that politics is about the negotiation between 2 needed will and resources on people who disagree but need each other to come to some sort of outcome and the negatives of when that does not happen or how it is approached

Way to Way too often what we get is propaganda fiction where all you have to do is kill an exaggerated straw man of your opponents and out comes a happy ending.

And more importantly I love killing the idea of destroying the hissing at both sides there are 2 sides of this you need both sides to agree and if you can't do that or you can't engage on how to get 12 the other and what you are advocating for all that you might claim the otherwise is the suppression orAuthority do not have to do that which is a lot more evil than you realize

One of the things that's really scary about nazis last week they were your neighbor or best friend you speak the same language and now they hate you so much that they're willing to kill you for a bunch of stuff that you don't even really understand or thought were good things or just innocent things

But this But this all gets sidestepped for a sort of I found the family that basically gives me everything I want like a changeling fantasy Whose association makes me pure snow because now I'm a victim and that's not responsible for my part and all of the damage that was caused and now can just revel in attacking that which once had authority over me or I was a part of because I will replace those who had authority over me previously

There will be no negative problems to this or if they are they will easily negated let's move on to the love triangle

And that And that's what the Crim Della crim of the c***

It's why I It's why I hate politics and stories because it feels as if it's not actually engaging with the political process or thinking or a person but being a means a political action against the audience and charging them for it

That's just preaching. And the obligation to take part in a luxury product being driven by the same or taking the place of a religious institution or community membership is disgusting

[mysterycharacterbracket]

61st place

61st place goes to character 47, aka Bain from Payday: the Heist and Payday 2!

Propaganda: Short description: This character is this criminal mastermind who’s unexpectedly kind to their crew. They can navigate, hack, and have evaded the FBI for years. This person is essentially the leader, but doesn’t really act like it, always complimenting their team. They’re reclusive, but clearly care about those they love even though they’ve never shown their face. They’re cold and almost heartless to those that cross them, calm and collected during high risk operations. Very self-sacrificial and loyal, though they’re not really appreciated by the other characters. They take responsibility for their crew, handling everything in the background; along with teaching them what they know. They never betray the protagonists, even though they get tortured for almost a year. They’ve beaten up mercenaries with their bare hands… They end up dying in a horrible way, but not before they save everybody they love. They only had a week with their crew before they passed, though I guess in that way, they died at their happiest. …Also, this person is implied to be psychic. The blorbo.

Long Description: there’s not a ton of lore on this character, but nobody else said it so I scrounged it up. In addition to all of the above, this character is implied to be an alien. They’re self-sacrificial to a fault because they feel guilty… that they haven’t told their crew that they’re literally bound together. Knight and King style, kind of. The type of alien that this character is turns out to be the type that’s bound to a certain person/people… but they lie about their powers. (You’d expect better lies from a criminal mastermind, huh?) They’re experimented on by another one of these “Kings,” and their crew rescues them, with the character saying “I knew you guys would come for me.” This is while they’re suffering from bullet wounds among other things. This character has always believed in their crew, but gets tormented when most other characters in this media don’t. When they die, it’s alone. It’s right after they say that they’re proud of their team… (Also there’s almost no fics about this person, that’s the worst part.)

In round 1, poll #16, he received 52 votes out of 167, or 31.1%.

In round L2, poll #63, he received 24 votes out of 47, or 51.1%.

In round L3, poll #63, he received 20 votes out of 34, or 58.8%, breaking the 1.1% pattern.

In round L4, poll #32, he received 29 votes out of 55, or 52.7%, breaking the identical digits at the end pattern.

In round L5, poll #32, he received 17 votes out of 30, or 56.7%.

And in round L6, poll #16, he received 13 votes out of 31, or 41.9%.

In all, he received 155 votes out of 364, or 42.6%.

And with that, we are through with reviewing 4/5 of the characters!