#And a lifetime of notoriety

[starsandsuch]

ATMAKARAKA THROUGH THE HOUSES: how does your soul’s purpose manifest in this lifetime? 💡🦋

Your Atmakaraka is the planet in your Vedic Astrology chart with the highest degree. This planet represents your soul’s purpose in the lifetime.

Your Atmakaraka is called your soul planet or your AK planet. It is the significator of your soul.

The house your Soul Planet is in will paint a picture to how exactly your souls purpose will manifest in this lifetime.

Read my original post on identifying your soul planet: here

Atmakaraka in the 1H:

Your souls purpose is about self development. You’re meant to cultivate your own identity in this lifetime. Your major life lessons relate to being authentic and following your own journey. To develop strong boundaries between who you are vs what your expected to be. You’re meant to do things uniquely in a way that suits you and you only. Disregard the path society sets out for you, and create your own. You’re destined for notoriety and recognition.

Atmakaraka in the 2H:

Your soul’s purpose is about creating stability and security for yourself. Your meant to establish yourself in the material world, and be self-sufficient financially. You’re life’s journey is about sustenance. Sustaining yourself, your name, your possessions, your resources and your money. It’s all about creating and maintaining a proper foundation for yourself. You’re meant to use your voice as a method for fulfilling your purpose. Developing your speech to convey a message is apart of what your soul wants to do.

Atmakaraka in the 3H:

Your soul’s purpose is about communication. How do you express yourself? What mediums help you get your message across most authentically? You are destined to bring a specific message to the world that can only be channeled through you. Your destiny has a lot to do with speech, messages, media and conversation. You are meant to exercise a sense of courage in this life and do things fearlessly. Fearlessly communicating your authentic thoughts to the world. Saying what’s on your heart. Through music, writing, poetry, public speaking and the like.

Atmakaraka in the 4H

Your soul’s journey is about developing your inner happiness. Your meant to do what brings you emotional fulfillment. What makes you feel safe, secure, emotionally aligned? That is what your soul seeks to experience in this lifetime. Alignment with family and ancestors is a key life theme for you. To experience the emotional bond with people you call your family. You’re meant to get in touch with your roots, and align with the foundation of who you are. You’re soul seeks a sense of rootedness to the past in order to cultivate your future. The connection you have with your mother is an important part of your journey.

Atmakaraka in the 5H:

Your destined to express yourself creatively in this lifetime. You’re meant to develop and display your creative talents to the world. Your creative contributions are important, unique, and only can be expressed by you. Your life purpose is connected to performance, arts and entertainment. Through these mediums you are able to express your true soul purpose. Parenthood is a sacred journey for you, where you’re meant to experience preganacy/ raising a child. Your destiny is connected to children in general. Teaching them, guiding them, being involved in their development.

Atmakaraka in the 6H:

Your soul seeks to be of service in this lifetime. You are meant to be a healer. Healing yourself, healing those who need your help. Your power lies in being of service to humanity through your healing abilities. You are destined to overcome adversities and cultivate a sense of resilience. You’ll experience challenges, yet this transforms you into the ultimate problem-solver. You develop impenetrable strength: mentally, spiritually and psychologically. You incarnated because society needs your help, God sending one of his strongest soldiers to help heal the world. You have a special connection with animals in this lifetime. They are your allies in this journey.

Atmakaraka in the 7H

Your soul seeks to connect with others through partnership. Your soul’s purpose involves being in relationships that are fulfilling on a emotional, psychological and physical level. It is in your destiny to cultivate your social presence in the world, being a person of charm, decorum and worldliness. Your major life themes involve how you appeal to people and how you use your social connections to elevate your life. Your soul seeks to be impactful in society, through the social influence you have.

Atmakaraka in the 8H:

Your soul’s purpose is destined towards transformation. You experience blockages, challenges and adversities but come out stronger every time. You’re meant to turn your pain into power, to be an alchemist. Your soul came here to experience transformation. Spiritually, mentally, physically and psychologically. You’ll be faced with many unexpected crises yet your powerful intuition will always guide you. The occult knowledge you have will be key in your journey. You’re destined to experience the power that comes from transforming yourself and your life. You’re destined to leave a powerful legacy.

Atmakaraka in the 9H:

You’re destined to be a guide to others. Your soul came here with the purpose of spiritual evolution. Over the course of your life you’ll have many awakenings, epiphanies and realizations. This leads you to amassing abundant wisdom. You’re destined to teach the wisdom you have to others, guiding them on their paths. Your destiny is a worldly one, where it impacts people on a global scale. Your soul seeks the truth, spiritual knowledge, and the ability to live a life free of falsities and illusions.

Atmakaraka in the 10H:

You are destined to achieve your long term goals and be established in the material world. Your soul seeks achievement in the material world. To be successful , have recognition and status is what you’re here to achieve. Your destined to leave your mark on the world in an authentic way, your here to build and leave your legacy through your career and reputation. You are destined for fame or high status.

Atmakaraka in the 11H:

You are destined to fulfill your wishes and desires. Your life has a lot to do with manifesting. Manifesting your long term goals and unique visions. You are a visionary. You’re meant to focus on your gains in life and how you can achieve success in the material realm. Along the way you are likely to be popular and influential. Your purpose leads you to elevating humanity through your influence, there’s a deeper theme here of you making a difference in the world. Your goals and desires help the collective at large. Through your influence you help shape the trajectory of society.

Atmakaraka in the 12H:

Your destiny is about spiritual liberation. Your soul seeks truth and enlightenment. More importantly it seeks freedom from the cycles of reincarnation. You’re likely here on earth now as one of your final lifetimes. You are an old soul. This means your life is about letting go and not having attachments in the material realm that keep you trapped here. That’s why you’re on a discovery of truth. Dispelling illusions and aligning with your true spiritual journey. Your road is lonely, isolating and harrowing at times, but it’s all for the purpose of aligning you with your spiritual destiny. You are a healer and wise person. Your purpose involves being of service to others. You find it hard to connect to the material world/ mainstream society bc your destined for something greater. You’re meant to fulfill your spiritual goals more than material. 12th house is the “exit”. The spiritual, mystical exit where your soul elevates to the next realm after this incarnation, and you break free from being recycled back to earth.

Related posts:

Your soul planet and your mission in this lifetime

Your 1st house ruler and your unique life path

[facts-i-just-made-up]

Who made the biggest sword ever?

"Biggest" can mean a few things:

The heaviest sword of all time is the 468lb "Le Glaive Chungeuse" of King Louis LXIX, so heavy nobody could wield it.

The longest sword ever made was the Gobai-nodachi, or "quintuple length longsword" forged by Masayoshi Johnson for a ceremony said to have resulted in the deaths of everyone present.

The thickest sword, three feet thick but only six inches long, was the Hungarian Chodesaber, which was used mostly for flattening dough.

The widest sword is currently the Grand Coronation Stub of King Charles, ruler of England as of March 2024. Shaped like a shallow isosceles triangle, its tip is almost 165 degrees.

The most expensive sword ever forged was the Diamond Sprinklesword of Muffy von Fitzwiggle-Plumnugget, which a rich Californian gave to his chihuahua for its third birthday. It could have paid to feed 30 billion people for five lifetimes.

The "biggest" sword in terms of fame and notoriety is the Sword of Damocles, which metaphorically hangs over the head of those with power as a reminder to be responsible lest they grow greedy or despotic. It has not been seen since around November of 2016.

Though not "big" per se, the sharpest sword of all time is currently being constructed at the Large Hadron Collider at CERN, and will be exactly one hydrogen ion thick at its point. It will be used exclusively to get the gunk out from the fingernails of the intern who is forging it. And God knows Harold needs it, just look at them on his facebook they're fucking disgusting.

[kaszuma]

Aera Perennius | Hoshina Soshiro

Part 7 of “Certainly Yours”

pairing: Hoshina Soshiro x fem!reader

summary: soshiro was never one to raise his voice at anyone. But the one time he did, it was because he almost lost you for good.

warnings: Slight Kn8 Manga Spoilers, Description of Pain / Injuries / Hospitalizations, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Arguments, Cursing, Slight mention of self-harm

wc: 9,793

–

note: I finiahed it earlier than anticipated so here you go-- I had such a difficult time writing this because I've been so busy. There were so many changes and the original draft had been scrapped so many times that it almost made me want to give up and start over. But lucky I didn't or I would've not updated in time. So, yay!

English is hard haha and sometimes it hates me and just doesn't make sense when I read it in my mind versus when I read it outloud. Anyways I will be doing slower updates, so no definitive dates nor titles for the next parts yet. But Part 8 and 9 will be back-to-back spicy NSFW stuff (courtesy of reaching 200 Followers. Thank you lots by the way), So stay tuned!! This is not proofread. So if I missed any warnings feel free to tell me. 🫶

–

Sleep had come naturally to you.

The sound of rapid footsteps and muffled yelling had all but faded into the distance as mere whispers against your ears.

Such rapidness did not seem to fit the silence of what had initially surrounded you. The sudden weight of your own body being dragged left and right until your vision blurs. The stark darkness of city skylines transformed into the unnatural shine of the hospital's fluorescent lights; one that made it hard to pick people's silhouettes apart.

And as such, it reminds you of the distant past.

One that was filled with vast open fields, very unlike the corporate labs you had been accustomed with. A stark contrast to the very corners of Japan, in the countryside where your grandparents had established a simple life for themselves. Filled to the brim with rice crops and summer cicadas.

And it makes you reminisce about the short time you'd spend there. On the cool nights after your summer school days would inevitably end. And you'd be dragged to a summer house where cousins and relatives had doted on you.

Such a homeward bound place was a far cry to the bustling streets of Tokyo's Eastern divisions. Which had often been endowed with the familiar cries of loud music and the steady rumbles of heavy railways underneath you.

One that Kaiju had lamented no peace from.

Even in the midst of high-story buildings where your workplace had boasted the use of sound proof walls. The cityscapes nearest Izumo Tech Corporation could not even be muzzled by its titanium doors, of which Japan's Top Secret Bioweapons had been kept. Schematics and all.

You had grown used to such a taciturn work environment.

Your existence is thrown into the small bubble of your private lab. Segregated from your coworker who valued work over social relations. And you had been much the same.

You and the rest of the technicians were far too focused on your projects. Tinkering away at the prototype suits that the company had sent your way. A partnership between your parent company and Japan’s Defense Force. A task of which you and a few others had been selected to create and maintain.

And how lucky you had been, to land yourself a snug spot in the notoriety of the Third Division's wake. The very same division that had boasted the least amount of casualties in the case of a large-scale Kaiju attack.

The very same division where Mina Ashiro had led and mounted into victory.

And you'd consider yourself lucky to have known such an amazing person in this lifetime.

For fate to have led her to you, you'd assume you've somehow accumulated some sort of good karma in your past life. The reward to you had been fresh in this new one. An action that had garnered some godly being to bestow upon you a chance to meet your soulmate.

You'd be remiss with disappointment if you hadn't met Soshiro Hoshina in this lifetime.

But prior to that. Before Ashiro had recruited you into her division, you had little to no contact with the officers on-field. Delegated to the simple task of sending blueprints in and out of Tachikawa's base should the time arise; begrudgingly in the early mornings of every month too.

Back then, you had befriended a bespectacled girl named Okonogi. Who wore a slightly bigger uniform than the rest of the recruits. A quirk of hers which you found rather amusing. She, who wholeheartedly believed she might still grow into the uniform that was two sizes too bigger than what was recommended of her.

And you had remembered the day you had met her too.

It was another typical day in your routine. Delivering notes to Captain Ashiro in and out of bases. Though this time, you had decided upon taking a detour. Seeing the empty spaces of the mess hall which granted you an opportune moment of grabbing some coffee.

And such a detour had led you upon the bespectacled girl. Your documents slipping from your very fingertips. And your other hand, which held the coffee mind you. Accidentally toppling over. Spilling the liquid against her pristine ivory lab coat. Staining it.

Lucky it had not been hot, or else that could've been an accident in the making.

“I am… so sorry about that.” Your eye catches the glimpse of her nametag, stained with a bit of caffeine. Okonogi was what it read. And you were already pulling out a handkerchief from your pocket. Intent on correcting the mistake you made.

“No, it's okay. Really.”

The sincerity in her voice made you visibly flinch. And you had half a mind to just shove her your wallet, a chance given to compensate her for the coat you ruined. But the look on her eyes was determined. Abrupt in the way she had declined you.

“Are you sure? Money shouldn't be a problem. I can definitely get you a better coat within the day..” You spoke with much guilt. And yet she insisted.

“No need, really! It's just a stain. Nothing a bit of bleach can't handle.” She moves lower with a smile, one hand tucked behind her knees as she tries to pick up the few folders scattered on the ground.

“-Lucky it didn't hit the documents! Or the Director would definitely have our heads for it.” Okonogi had surprisingly jested your way. And a small laugh bubbles between the two of you in turn. As if you had known each other for quite some time now.

“I suppose so.” You had spoken between giggles. The sentiment shared between the two had all but eased the tension of the room.

And the brunette had gingerly handed you the pile of documents that had been untarnished. Though, one in particular catches her trained eye.

It was a simple list of materials used for the next batch of combat suits to-be-made. Or at least, that was the pitch you had planned to present today. In the hopes that Mina Ashiro would give it enough attention and send it to command for a much more direct approval.

And Okonogi, who was a newbie at the time. Had known all too well of the budding genius you had been. A technician far too enraptured in improving Combat Suits and weapons catering for strange combat. One that did not conform to the normalcy of firearms which had modernized the era.

And it seems one of your papers in particular had caught her attention. Like a hammer against glass.

It was a series of notes and drawings involving bronze wires that resembled the muscle groups of a Kaiju's inner workings. All built into the combat suit that had been Izumo Tech's symbolic masterpiece.

And its Kaiju plating was as amazing as it was unconventional. Built to last no doubt in the wake of an ever evolving organization.

Okonogi could not help but stare at it. Admiring the artistry and engineering involved in such a concept.

“An idea of yours?” She asks. And you nod in turn. Surprised by the way she did not immediately question the schematics.

Normally you'd be met with strange looks. One that questioned the very ethics of your research for involving Kaiju parts into the combat suits.

But the Defense Force had long since been converting strong Kaiju into weaponry. And applying the same sentiments to a combat suit, should be no different. “That's right.”

“I was hoping to improve the current designs of the Combat Suits.” You admitted. “If it succeeds, it might help our soldiers a lot more. Survivability wise..I mean.”

And Okonogi smiles at this. A layer of irony mixed in with the few laughs that bubbled within her chest.

She knew how fragile lives can be. Especially in their line of work where they had faced massive enemies almost on a daily basis. And a battle of attrition against such monsters? It was never a pretty picture.

But still, it had been a rare sight to see one so dedicated with quality of life improvements. And it was as if Okonogi knew that she'd be able to trust you with such a task.

“Glad to see you working on it! People have been volunteering less and less these days. But if we had better tech, I'm sure our members would increase by a large margin.”

Her assurance made you nod. Already taking the paper from her hands and delicately sliding it back to the rest of the folders you held. Carefully standing as the both of you had come to smile at each other.

“If there's a chance it can save lives. There's no harm in trying. It's just a part of the job.”

“There's definitely a truth in that.” Okonogi remained positive with a dip to her head. Making her rimmed glasses slide gently from the bridge of her nose. A tilt in her head as she next spoke.

“-But, why use bronze by the way? Wouldn't steel or alloy be a better alternative?”

You had looked over to the notes peeking from your file. And a smile is etched on the very corner of your lips. Complacent in the way you had so easily looked at her, as if you knew something she did not.

“There's a saying you see.”

Okonogi tilts her head upward. Who had finally moved to fixate her gaze to you. Eyes meeting with the absolute tenacity and confidence at your craft. “...a saying?”

You nod. “They say that some people should seek things that are more lasting than bronze.”

“Does bronze not last very long?”

“Oh it does. But even in metals, people try to find something much better right?” Okonogi who had paused to think about your words. Had only nodded in turn. Your sentiment was a much more refreshing and positive take than she had imagined it to be.

“I intend to find that material. One that would make a monument more lasting than the lives we lost.”

And Okonogi’s breath hitches. And you had looked her in the eye, with a determination she was sure would last you a lifetime. “Even if that means I have to dissect a Kaiju and use its very skin as armor.”

A bit morbid for her take. But still, she couldn't help but admire your tenacity. It was the same sentiment she'd see with the soldiers. And somehow, it reminds her of a certain someone who was all smiles despite wielding a blade.

“I suppose most Kaiju do have a layer of tough skin..” She jested. And your shoulders shake with a bubbling smile. The start of a silly friendship perhaps, where Soshiro's eyes would soon flicker your way.

And somehow things just started to click into place.

You didn't know if it was fate. Had it been Okonogi or Mina Ashiro that led you to him. But it wasn't until a few weeks later, you had found yourself responsible for the Third's technical division. Overseeing much of the repairs and weapon upgrades needed for Kaiju slaying. And it was in that very same division where you had grown much closer to him.

A strange recruit, scouted from the Kansai district. Where Captain Ashiro had particularly shown a keen interest in. His skill in the blade had been incomparable to his peers. And although he boasted the highest individual body-count when it came to handling melee pursuits. You had once thought him stupid for sticking to a fighting technique that had long since aged from the existence of firearms.

But how wrong you had been in judging him for that.

Okonogi often reminded you not to be too harsh on him whenever the two of you had just so happened to meet. Jesting that you two would've made a stellar couple, had you both given each other a chance. And although you've denied such things a few times before, Soshiro would always take a glance at you as if reading the expressions on your face. Thoroughly investigating the subtle expressions you wore that would've reached his conclusion.

And each time after that, he too would answer for you. A denial. A white lie.

And Okonogi always saw through it of course. She had been there since the beginning. Serving cupid for the both of you.

And when she can, she had always been peppy in her step. Pushing the both of you in a particular direction. Waiting for one of you to make a move. Calculated like masters playing chess on a board. By far you two had been hopeless. If it wasn’t for Okonogi’s encouragement, Soshiro wouldn’t have thought to visit you between breaks. And how lucky you had been to have the girl pry him out of his skittish shell.

It’s a wonder you two had gotten together like this.

You had rarely seen the girl frown or be frustrated over anything. Let alone your own bite when it comes to Soshiro's mixed signals.

So it had been a sudden whiplash, seeing her so frightened above you. Her voice had been unusually drawled and shaky as she repeated your name. Trying to keep you awake despite the far off look you had in the depths of your irises.

Wait.

Why was it so blurry all of a sudden?

Where were you again?

Right.

You were injured. And from the look on her face, it was probably worse than you had realized. The trickle of an unfamiliar liquid slid down your forehead to the very height of your cheek. Where you could’ve sworn a clawed hand had been there to comfort you.

Larger than your own, and definitely plated with armor. Gently grazing the very skin of your cheek.

Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit.

It's starting to hurt. The pain on your lower back had suddenly hit you like a metric ton of weighted bricks. Like something jagged and sharp had punctured through you. A result from a bad fall.

“Sweetheart. Keep yer’ eyes open alright?”

You heard a deep rumble from the side. And your eyes pried away from Okonogi's disturbed features. Suddenly enamored by the wine red irises that looked at you as if you had gone through hell and back.

Had it really been that bad?

Last you checked, you were narrowly able to escape Kaiju's attacks. The flashes of its flaky features had encompassed your mind’s eye. And the ground below you had bellowed like a monster’s mouth. Suddenly ripping open as a shockwave had violently lifted you from your feet.

And like a leaf on a windy day, you were blown to the side. Crashing harshly against the window of a boutique. A stray shard puncturing your lower back to the point of near paralysis. And it leaves you barely conscious to see the not so lucky victims that tried to escape the Kaiju.

One group in particular had been crushed by the rubble of a building. And somehow the scent of blood and bones was enough to knock you out cold. Their downfall would’ve made you vomit, had you not been injured and too dizzy to think about it all.

And as morbid as it sounded, you had been fortunate enough to have only been thrown aside. Sacked into a world of pain which had reminded you that you were very much alive. It had been a miracle that Soshiro found you when he did. Despite the slight sprain on his ankle and the sores he felt in the muscles of his arms. He forced himself to run. Empowered to meet with you, ushered by the help of Number 10’s powers.

And like clockwork he was led straight to you. The fears he had once buried deep in the back of his brain had all came flooding through.

And he didn’t know what to do.

…

You heard a few voices then.

Although it was barely comprehensible, you could make out a few distinct ones from the array of shouts. Your name in particular was whispered in a prayer. Begging you not to fall asleep despite the odd temptation to. And sure enough, the back and forth argument you heard between two figures was enough to keep your mind and heart racing with urgency. The look between Okonogi and Soshiro’s face had all been so different than usual that it frightens you so.

But despite the noise, despite the shouting. You heard him in clear daylight. Like it had been the only voice in the room. Isolated from the rest who had rushed in a frenzy.

“I got ya’ alright? I’m here baby. I’m right here.”

His reassurances had blanked when his voice cracked. Desperate like he had been ready to cry. The way your name had escaped his lips was almost hesitant. As if he didn't deserve to call you out. And you wanted to stop him before his thoughts could drift further. But your voice had failed you when you needed it most. A soft cry escaping your lips instead.

I'm okay.

I'm here.

I'm alive.

All of that died the moment it tried to leave your throat. And without those very words. Soshiro's face was left to contort. As if he were the one in pain instead of you. And how he'd wished that were the case.

“Let me through!”

You heard him scream. And your eyes had focused just enough to see Okonogi and a few nurses blocking his pathway to you. Desperately trying to push past them despite the grievances.

The sight had been a blur.

One second your vision was fine. The next you had felt the telltale signs of drowsiness hit you. And you feel the way the pain medication had started to kick in when your eyes had isolated itself from the world. Your body’s exhaustion hits you squarely on the chest down to your very toes. And when you had been dragged to the next room over. Soshiro had been the last face you had seen before separation. Sleep pulling you over until your breath is taken from you in that instance.

Your name had been the only thing Soshiro could say afterwards.

“I said let me through–That's an order from your Superior Officer, Okonogi.” Soshiro had warned her. Voice uncharacteristically deep when issuing an order. It was normally never used in this way. Such a tone was only ever used to command Number 10 when he had been too stubborn to listen.

But the bespectacled girl knew better than to fan the flame. And in retrospect, she out of anyone would understand his frustrations the most. Yet she stood her ground. Gently shaking her head at her heated friend.

“Vice Captain.” Okonogi started. Hands already raised to try and calm him down. And she could see it in his eyes; the way it subconsciously followed the rolling bed they had put you in.

Dragging your bed into another room where only the best medical practitioners had worked on you. And yet despite that, he couldn't find it in himself to sit still. His gut sinking at the mere thought of you getting worse than when he had already found you in. And he was willing to bet Weapons 10 had all but read the blatant emotions he displayed on his sleeve. With or without having to delve into his mind.

He was in utter ruin just from your condition.

“-Please understand. You cannot, in under any circumstances enter the surgery room, sir.”

“To hell with that!”

The scream had made Okonogi frown. And Soshiro had half a mind to push past the smaller woman. And rush forward with Number 10's help. But he stopped midway. Reminding himself that his suit could go on a rampage at any time. And right now, he did not want to expose Okonogi and a handful of civilians to Number 10's war-ridden desires. His deep baritones had instead vanished for more firm ones. Unlike the resentment from prior. Oddly curt in his delivery.

“Move. Or I’ll do somethin’ drastic.” He steps forward.

A threat is a threat, and he hoped that would at least be enough to convince the bespectacled girl to move. Yet Okonogi had known him for far too long to actually perceive it as one. And she looks unfazed by his words.

“Sir please.” She pleaded. “It'll only worry you more.”

Her voice was gentle. Understanding even. It almost reminded him of the way you speak at times. Stern but with a hint of softness when it came to his stubbornness. And how he wished it was you he was talking to right now.

“Just please try to calm down. We should get your own wounds treated first and then we can-”

“Fuck no. I'm going in there and-”

“Hoshina.” The stern voice of their Captain had made them both flinch. And the heavy cleats of Mina Ashiro'a footsteps had gotten louder as she had made her way closer to the two.

“Captain Ashiro.” Soshiro had spoken with a much more leveled tone than he did earlier. Hand raising into a salute as the rest followed suit. Though even in his greeting, his frustrations had still been made entirely clear. And he was more than willing to face insubordination just to get to you. But Mina was one step ahead of him.

“Hoshina. You’re causing a disturbance and deliberately disrupting the medical wing from doing their job--I'd let you run some laps. But I can see you're injured.”

Soshiro had glanced down at his body, a light scoff emerging from his lips when she had noticed the way he stood, limping.

“Patch your own wounds up and we can discuss it later.”

And Soshiro had frowned at the way she immediately knew. A sixth sense perhaps that he had been getting sloppy. And sometimes he feared Mina Ashiro would kick him out of the Third because of it. But Mina made no such accusation, instead her eyes had been understanding.

Firm as they usually are, she, like Okonogi, was quite aware of your relationship with Soshiro. And by all means, she understood his sentiment.

Today had been a jumbled mess. And Soshiro was practically facing the very brunt of it all.

With you as its victim.

“But-”

“That's an order, Vice Captain. Do not make me repeat myself.” Her stern reply had been met with his half-meant glare. Red irises swirling with thoughts before ultimately concluding that Mina had been right. Okonogi too. He'd just been too stubborn to see it.

And for a good few seconds, he finally drops his own staring.

Reluctant as he had finally turned around. Facing Okonogi with a sort of defeated look in his eyes. Uncharacteristic to her as he'd normally be so cheery, even in the face of impending death.

He'd be thrown into a pit. And as long as he was still kickin’ he'd probably end up smiling and joking about it the next day.

This had definitely been a first for the two to witness.

And although Mina had not usually been the closest to Soshiro. He couldn't help but make an exception this time. She'd waive him of running laps, not as an officer. But as her friend. And a stern hand was placed squarely on his shoulder. Gently giving it a pat of reassurance. One that Okonogi would follow up with her own.

“It'll be okay. Right Captain?” Okonogi glanced between the two.

“That's right. I'll see to it personally that she gets the best care. For now, get yourself patched up–That'll be the punishment you get for speaking to your superior officer.” She awkwardly spoke. Though a small reassuring smile had cracked on the face of her usually hardened expressions.

And such a sentiment from both the girls had silenced him before he could think of another protest to answer with.

“understood.” He begrudgingly spoke. His hand balling into tight fists at the possibility that you'd wake up without him by your side.

Bronze was made to last, yet it wasn't exempt from tarnish after all.

“Good. I'll inform you shortly once her treatment is done–Okonogi.”

“Yes?” Her reply had been immediate.

“Make sure his wounds are treated. And, I expect a detailed report on Number 10's latest excursion later.”

“Roger.” Okonogi had saluted. And Soshiro watched her as she slowly walked past them. Entering the very same room where he had not even had the chance to take a glimpse in.

His arms had gently felt the pull to another direction. Okonogi had done well at Mina's request as he had all but dragged his feet further away from the blaring red lights of the operating room.

And the flicker of your sleeping face was all that’s left before he too was separated somewhere else.

A place where he was left to wonder what will become of you. And for a moment, his distinct thought was a scenario where he hadn't met you.

If only he hadn't asked you out that day..things would've turned differently.

Right?

…

Your eyes blew wide open. The strangled breaths you took were caught on your throat as you could smell the bitter antiseptics nip the back of your nostrils. It reminded you of a hospital. That of which you had the unpleasant experience of having to frequent anytime Soshiro would come back to base injured.

Often you'd be on the other side of his bed. A frown on your face as the condition of his health had been on the top of your mind. And each time with a smile, he'd make a joke to ease the tension in the room. A signal to indicate he had been alright. Despite the lack of words you two would exchange.

Habitually it was you unharmed. You left to worry at his bedside.

So it had been a rare sight indeed, to find yourself on the opposite side of the spectrum.

Laid in thin hospital robes. Connected to a needle of an IV drip. The constant flow of medicine made you drowsy and your thoughts jumbled into a mesa of numbness. And if you had looked at the amount of bandages wrapped around your torso you'd surely start squirming in place.

But just when you were about to scrutinize the heavy onset of your heartrate’s monitor. The blaring sound was all but silenced when you heard the familiar tremors of his voice. Smooth and soft, like you had always heard them as.

“Yer’ finally awake.”

You turned to his direction. Bright eyes had met his own which had been as familiar as it was squinted. His irises were more crystalline and tired than usual. Puffy on the corners, like he hadn't been given a chance to get a good night’s sleep between your hospitalization.

And yet, despite the unfamiliarity of his somber tone; the despondent frowns he'd make.

His voice had been the sound you missed the most.

“Soshiro..” You croak out. Voice dry like someone had stuffed cotton down your throat. And you try your best to scoot closer. To move and stand like you had always done when faced towards him. But this greeting would cut short. Hands restrained by firm bandages and hollow tubes that weighed heavily on your skin. And you hadn't realized the mumble of a barely audible whimper from your mouth. One that Soshiro could not miss even if he tried to.

Soshiro noticed the way you had squirmed. Struggling to sit up. Which made him all the more vigilant. And he ends up closing the small leatherbound book he'd always brought with him. Sinking it back on his pocket where you had been accustomed to seeing it.

Walking much closer to you in an attempt to calm and shush you.

“Where are we?” You asked him. And his fingers hesitantly graze your cheek. The same way when you had blood trickling down it moments prior. “Base. The Medical wing took ya’ in.”

His words were oddly curt in delivery. And although the average person who knew Soshiro on a surface level could probably not tell. You were able to differentiate the distinct way his voice had sounded odd. Such sentiments laid rather clearly for you. And you can see the layer of guilt etched on his stiff face.

“Okonogi?” You inquired. And he gives you a nod.

“Safe. I'll call her for ya’ later so she doesn't worry.” and you let out a breathless sigh. Your head slumping against the cushion of the soft pillow. The lingering feeling of glass and cement on you had all been but a pipe dream now. A memory that you'd soon forget.

And how Soshiro wished it was that easy for him to forget.

“How are you feelin? I can call the nurse for ya if anything hurts.” He moves to turn around.

Eyes already searching for the small caller that was given to him in case of emergencies. Though your hand, as painful as it felt, had pulled him in. Weak fingertips grabbing the sleeves of his jacket to refuse him. Your eyes remained squinted as they were sharp despite the fatigue. And you caught the glimpse of bandages wrapped around his skin. A stark testament to the rest of his unblemished face.

“What happened?” You had immediately tried to get up. Alert in the way you had wanted to reach out and inspect his own injuries. But the fatigue of your body had stopped you. Causing you to slump forward and unto his willing arms who had been cautious in the way he handled you.

“Easy. You're still…not well.” Soshiro gently nudged you back down. Hand placed squarely on your chest to ease you into the pillow. But you stubbornly persisted. Compromising by sitting up against the bed's headboard instead.

“That doesn't matter. What's more important is, what happened to you. Are you alright?”

“That doesn't matter? Are you seriously askin’ me that right now?” For a moment you mistake his scoff for a laugh. His hands which had held you firmly had just as quickly left leaving the spot on your skin cold and yearning for his proximity.

Had you said something wrong? This aggression was unlike him.

Soshiro was rarely this agitated. And your voice couldn't help shrivel in meek irritation. Unsure whether you should respond back with much the same turbulence.

“Should I…not be asking you that?” You spoke unsure. And he shakes his head in turn.

“You were dead-still for five days straight and yer tellin’ me THAT doesn't matter right now?”

You didn't know how else to reply. The way his tone had shifted into a scoff had made you double back to glare at his face. For once since you awoke, you truly saw how tense he had been. Gone was his usual suave smile that made you laugh or cry in between meetings.

He had been too worried to focus on that. But you had been too frustrated at this sudden change. That it made your voice come more forcefully than you anticipated. “Well isn't it obvious? I'm worried about you.”

You replied. Your own expression had squished into rapid vexation. And you see the way he takes a few steps back, too far for your touch to reach. And it pained you that you couldn't just stand up and make him face you like you usually could.

“And you think I don't feel the same!?” He spoke loudly. Causing your shoulders to flinch in turn. One he had regretted as soon as he spoke. And yet, he continued.

“You don't think..that I didn't nearly kill myself when I found you bleeding in the middle of that goddamn street?” He pointed out the window.

And your expression had turned liquid at the images that flash in your mind. Imagining how he had found you. His thoughts, his expressions..you could only imagine the torment he felt the moment he found you. Barely breathing.

His breaths came in gasps. Eyes widened so that you can clearly see the crimson of his eyes peeking through. And suddenly you notice the way Soshiro had oddly been so vulnerable in front of you. The quips on your sore throat began to die down when you saw how frustrated–how fearful he had looked in the moment. And gods did you wish you woke up sooner just to comfort him.

“No–that’s not what I meant. I only wanted to know if you were okay. Is it so wrong to ask?”

“Well maybe ya’ shouldn't have asked at all.” He huffed out. Looking away from you with regret lingering on his features.

It was stupid. He thought To get so frustrated over something so tiny. But as much as Soshiro Hoshina excluded the guise of a proper adult. He had been flawed just like the rest of everyone else. And he'd be lying if he didn't have his moments of doubt. Often scrutinizing in the lonely privacy of his home. Where he knew no one would bother him.

That is of course, before you had entered his life.

But not everything was understood between the two of you. Okonogi was a witness to the piles of misunderstandings you both had caused. And without help you two were likely never to get along, habitually falling for the same skittish routine you had played at.

But a miracle happened. With him belonging to you. And you belonging to him.

So why was it that your heart cramped so much? Surely it was not the pains of a physical injury. Let alone a type of sickness.

Instead it was struck by simple bad habits and insecurities. One of which even you had trouble dealing with. And the loud firmness of his voice had made such an impact on your heart that you began to frown. Unable to hold back your bite.

“What is your problem!?” You started. “Listen, can we just please have this conversation some other time. And then we can-”

“And then we can, what? Do you want me to just sit here and forget that all happened?” He had interjected.

And suddenly you feel your brows knit tightly. Eyes feeling heavy from the burst of a headache you had gotten. Of all the times Soshiro wanted to argue, it's the time you had just woken up.

But he wasn't entirely unjustified.

There have been plenty of moments where you had fanned the flames of a fire that should've ended right then and there. Your word choice is poor and your temperament less than ideal.

For as frustrated as you had been, you understood Soshiro's sentiments. And your hands had raised as a sort of white flag. Not needing this fight to escalate more than it should.

Not when you were both injured and all you wanted to do was crawl into his arms.

“-Listen Soshiro, I didn't mean to upset you. I only wanted to know if you were okay.”

“Does that matter?” He repeats your own words. And you had to hold back another jab of acknowledgement. Smart in the way he played his words. It almost made you want to laugh. But this time, your intent came from sincerity.

And his small play of mockery had been a sight for sore eyes, since you had quickly gotten the gist of what he had been trying to convey. Wrong in your choice of words. This time, you correct your mistake. Sincerity and all.

“Yes it matters. More than anything– of course it matters.” You had told him. And you see the way Soshiro’s mouth quivers into a small tremble. Uncanny when he'd normally be so laid-back and sweet when it came to you.

And how you'd wish he just took a breather and relaxed. Maybe take a break so that they could talk things out. Without yelling preferably. But that had not been possible. At least not just yet from the way he replied.

“Well had I not made it in time, you woulda’ been dead. Do you hear me?”

“And yet, Here. I. Am. A witness to your unwarranted behavior.”

“Behavior that's justified because I shouldn't have let you outta my sight.”

Silence had followed soon after. Your mouth gapes for a moment to think of a reply when the words slip past your lips. And Soshiro would note how uncharacteristic that was, even for you. He, who was always used to your quick replies and clever jabs. But it seems his words had cut too far this time.

And he pried his eyes away from you. Chest heaving as he ran a hand through his face. “I shouldn't have..”

He composed himself. Clearing his throat whilst you looked at him with an etched frown on your face. One that he wished would go away. But he had been the cause of this.

He had been the one to make your smile go away. And it somehow makes him feel even worse.

“I'm sorry. I didn't mean to yell at you. I just-”

“Soshiro.” Your voice sounded like bells. And when he looked up, relief had immediately sagged his shoulders upon seeing your gaze blown wide open. Not at all restrained by the pain medication and exhaustion you had felt.

And your hand had gently reached up to grab his own. Gentle in the way her thumb caressed his knuckle which had been previously so bruised and bloodied.

And although there was a struggle to reach for his hand. Your touch was met halfway. Gently threading your much softer skin that would've paled in comparison to a blanket had he not taken glances.

“What happened back there wasn't your fault. We couldn't have known that the Kaiju would follow me back to the shelter.” You whisper. And Soshiro's expression had turned serious. Like he held a weight that you couldn't possibly fathom even if you tried.

“And yet I let it slip away.”

“I let it get to you, and now you're in here because of me.” He had wanted to so badly pull away from you. To walk himself out before he could be tempted to lean back into those pretty eyes of yours. But the moment he met your sight.

Those sad eyes of yours had been his journey's end. And he couldn't do that to you. Not when your expression had frustratingly asked him to stay.

“And yet it was also because of you that I'm still alive and breathing, Soshiro.” You reasoned. “You don't give yourself enough credit. If it hadn't been for you I would've been-”

“Dead.” He cut you off. “You would've been dead.”

“No. You wouldn't have allowed that. You're the Vice Captain, remember? If there's anywhere safer for me, it's by your side.” You didn't know whether such assurances had really made him listen. The way he was assured in that answer of his wasn't a mere fortnight conclusion. It was as if he had been thinking of such consequences for a much longer time, and that alone makes your heart sink.

So you scooted closer. Moving in to try and pull him down so that you could wrap your arms around his neck. And just when you were snaking it through his shoulders. His hands had stopped you midway.

His calloused palms holding on to the points of your elbows as he gently pries you off of him.

Normally this would be met with your pout. Maybe another bout of force just let the stubborn man look your way. But you had been too weak, still healing from an injury you had no control over. And his response is far too swift for your liking. Leaving your arms missing the warmth his body could provide you.

“No, no, no, no, no–no. You don't understand. I don't deserve to be anywhere near you right now.” He had managed to convince himself. Looking away as the anxiety within you had spiked upon his words.

“Soshiro. Listen to me we can-”

“What I’m saying is that we're done here.”

You had blinked. Looking up at him who had towered above your bed. A somber look on his expression despite the daunting words he had spoken. He looked passive. Unaffected even. Like he had been ready for this moment which had been planned for a long time coming. And your voice could only muster a feeble whisper.

“What do you mean we're done?”

“It's over.” Soshiro continued. Not once paying your face any heed. Lest he change his mind from doing you a greater good he deemed correct. “I don't want anything to do with ya’ anymore.”

If this had been a dream you would've laughed at the way he delivered such a sentiment.

You'd somehow suppress the inner workings of your shock and you'd wake up to find the morning documents you promised yourself to do; in the desk untouched where it usually had been.

And by the time you left your room, you'd habitually laugh it off and tell Soshiro about it in the afternoon just to get a chuckle and light scolding out of him. The usual banter that admittedly, had always been the highlight of your day.

But this had not been a dream.

And hearing him say that. Had hurt more than you anticipated it seemed. And your voice cracks before you can even register yourself speaking.

"Is this because you think I can't love you?" The sudden appearance of tears had painted your face. And you had tried to sniff away the bigger ones that threatened to spill over. But to no avail.

And Soshiro’s eyes widen at the telltale signs of your crying. An unexpected third party which had not been invited to the list of things he ought to do. And his head reels to face you once more. Seeing your face redden with a shame he'd never thought he'd see.

"Do you really think that I'm incapable of willingly loving you? Even beyond that fucking sword of yours-" And Soshiro had all but shook his head. Remorseful in the way tears had jerked from your eyes.

"That ain't the point!"

"Then what IS the point!?" Your tears had blurred your vision. And your hand had embarrassingly moved up to wipe it. One that Soshiro had wished to do for himself had he not been so stubborn.

“-What is the point if I can't make sense of you trying to leave me?"

The turmoil in your voice had been made present. One so encompassing that Soshiro couldn't ignore. And as much as it hurts you to scream. It hurt him to see you suddenly cry like this. Someone he associated as being so usually strong-willed, crumbling in a few short words from him. And suddenly, it feels as if he wants to swallow back his words. Mouth churned into regret when he had moved to take a step closer to you.

“Sweetheart, please..I-”

He shook his head. Suddenly finding himself kneeling down in front of your bed. And when your eyes had met his, it was as if his heart had stopped momentarily. Too focused on the way you had looked at him in desperation. Mixed with both physical and emotional pain.

And he had been the cause of that. Regrettably he knew he had been the cause of that.

"Is the idea of me loving you THAT terrible of a concept to you?" you spoke flimsily. Words betraying the tone you wanted to convey. And somehow you felt worse than when blood was unnaturally seeping out of your wound.

And his own body. One that betrayed his own commands, had a mind of its own. Strong arms wrapping around your bandaged ones that had still been healing from the minor cuts you had accumulated. And the warm steady beat of his heart had drowned you back into reality. Cheeks pressed against his and regrettably, soiling his jacket.

Not that he minded of course. Far too focused on wiping your tears away. Shushing you when you'd shudder from the breathless sniffles he'd been the cause of.

"Shit- no sweetheart no. I didn't mean it."

“I didn't mean it. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.” His instant apologies and regrets had echoed for a few moments. The sudden urge to calm you down had him reeling just to caress your shoulders. Weary of the injuries you were faced with as you cried in his arms.

And the struggling shudders you were faced with had all been too painful to see. Comical in the way he had all but worsened your condition when stressing a healing patient had been the last thing people needed to be reminded of.

Yet here you were, struggling to even cry when every breath would agitate any bandaged injuries you'd gotten. And it had been his fault entirely.

“I'm not leaving ya. I'm right here..” He whispered. And you had forcibly glanced up. Seeing the way his distress had wrinkled those usually foxy eyes. Like he had suddenly gained a keen sense of his stupidity and finally realized that his sentiments were not helping you. And upon realization you couldn't help but feel how silly all this had been.

You would've laughed had you not wasted such excess energy into crying your heart out in front of him. Likely an accumulation from the week's worth of not being able to see each other.

That and other things, which were obvious enough.

But you spoke. Wanting to pick his thoughts apart. Reason with him the next time this may happen. And your eyes flutter away the tears as you had finally managed to calm down enough to ask him.

“Then why? Why even suggest that?” Your voice had been soft. His thumbs move to caress the stray tears away from your face. Even moving to casually use his sleeves to gently wipe your cheeks in assurance of his presence. And you close your eyes at the simple gesture. Suddenly feeling much better now that he had been so close to you like this.

Crap, he set himself up didn't he? And just when he had this all planned out too.

In the wake of your hospitalization, he had planned to leave you. Somehow make you change occupations. Maybe work for a tech company where your life wouldn't be on the line. Where you'd be far away from his life and you could live a happy, seperate life from him.

But who was he kidding? Even he thinks it's stupid. The idea of doing you the greater good.

It had sounded conclusive back then.

He'd likely die young, a Kaiju attack that he had lacked defenses in no doubt. And somehow, you'd weasel your way out and live an old happy life.

Like bronze. Tarnished but long lasting.

But you had seen through his intention. And every right to refuse such a concept had knocked him over the head. A simple shed of tears was all it took for such a carefully built wall to crumble. His resolve in shambles at the mere thought of you leaving.

And to take that away from you. To separate the both of you like that? It felt wrong. And somehow his stupidity makes him laugh.

And the next words uttered had been voluntary on his part. Sloppy but it came out from an honest place. That even he doubted its power.

"Because, it scares me how much I need you. Okay?" He leans in. Head against your own so that your noses would touch. And you could see the little cracks on that smile of his. A stark contrast to the facade of laughs he'd usually give off. And it makes your heart flutter upon such fleeting confessions.

"Just hearing that voice of yours is enough to wreck me. And ruin me for anybody else."

"And when I saw you. Layin' there with that faraway look on your eyes. I just couldn't fucking breathe."

The way his eyes had not once left yours had felt like the first time you had met him. In that room with the Captain watching your interactions.

You had been less amicable to each other by then. Always second guessing each other by investigating the little nuances of your expressions. But somehow, the difficulties in reading each other had not been so far fetched. And the longer you two would spend time together. The more you had an inkling of what the other was thinking. And eventually an unspoken understanding had come between the both of you.

One that required no words to speak. Nor assistance from anywhere else. Just you and him. Nothing more.

"What If I lose you? You're all I fucking have.."

"Soshiro.” You whispered. Suddenly feeling the weight of his words drop down on you upon his realization. And you shake your head in turn. Immediately running your hands on the soft tresses of his hair. “You’re not going to lose me.”

“And what if I did?” He was quick to interject. “What if I had been a second too late and you were killed?”

“-And yet I'm still here. See?” You moved his intertwined hands to your chest. Firmly letting him feel the pulse of your heart. A repetition had to be made in order to convince him. And if you had to do such things a million times, there was no doubt you’d do it a thousand more times.

And his hand couldn't help but press firmly. Gingerly looking everywhere to check your wellbeing. Satisfied when he had settled in your slightly puffy eyes that he had been all too remorseful of when he found it too pretty to look away from.

You leaned in. Pressing light kisses against his cheeks to calm his thoughts. The voice in the back of his head all but silenced. When the adrenaline kicked in, because somehow he found himself unfocused when he caught your lips in his.

It was short and sweet.

Far different from the many picturesque and grandiose kisses he'd read about in books. And far too slow amidst the rush hours of your working breaks. Where you'd snag a few touches here and there just to get a rise out of each other. No this had been far too different. Far too gentle than it normally was. But despite the innocence of such a contact. It had made a more lasting impact on him.

The hesitation implied vulnerability, and without it. You'd be remiss to see Soshiro's true feelings underneath it. And it makes you pull away to rub your own hands against his chest. Admiring the way his uniform had engulfed him warmly in the cold air conditioning in the room.

All that matters was that they were okay now.

All that matters is that they are together now. Is that so much to ask?

“I won't die so easily, Soshiro.” Your assurances had made him perk up. Head still leaning against yours where you could see the pretty hallmarks of his tired eyes.

“I may not be able to know..everything in that damn head of yours. But what I do know? Is that I have unwavering trust in you. And that's the only reason I made it out alive today.” Your voice had made him crack a smile. One that makes you raise a brow at him. Suddenly fixated on the way his demeanor had changed so easily when you had spoken your piece.

And Soshiro, ever the enigma that he was. Had stopped his reluctance around you. Finally getting a chance to relax as his hands slotted its way to the bounce of your cheek and jaw, which he had always found so endearing to touch and look at.

He couldn't help but run soothing circles on your flesh. A habit he might've picked up on when reading a few romances here and there.And it makes you wonder if he had always been this sweet. A layer unknown go you that you'd love to rediscover, if only he'd put down that smart mouth of his.

“I think that was ‘bout a week ago.” He corrected you. His face is as snarky as his comment. And that was enough to shake your head.

But of course, that had been too much to ask. Too far and few inbetween. You spoke too soon.

“Fine. A week ago.” You affirmed. Though this time you had rolled your eyes with a laugh of your own.

And the two of you had simply sat there. Soshiro rocking you back and forth as best he could without risking your injuries. Hands against the plush of your waistline, carefully making sure the stitches were still intact. But the warmth had remained.

This time he had been less distant. More calm and understanding like he had usually been. And that was enough for you. For now.

“Do you mean that?”

“Mean what?” You had blinked with a smile on your face. Sweet as it came, you had a viper that you knew how to use. And Soshiro wasn't ever one to stop confronting it. Even if he had to break out of his shell to ask the harder questions between you both.

“When you said you loved me.” He added.

And he wouldn't be able to miss that pretty smile forming on the corners of your lips. Leaning against him until the softness of your lips had grazed his chapped ones. Though you’d note, it was still gentle. Still his. And still yours to capture should you want it.

“Do I have to kiss you again and prove it?” You mutter out.

“Do you not want to right now?”

And without a doubt did you lean in. Capturing his lips with a crooked smile in between. Soft and sensual. And you had missed this. Missed him who had not gotten the chance to set things right by you.

How long had it been since you had taken the time to really kiss him? Without the rush of prying eyes, nor the responsibilities that came with their work. It was just a kiss, yet in this moment it felt like everything.

Slow and reassuring. Without the need of words to complicate things. It had conveyed everything he needed to know. And when you pulled back, Soshiro could see the pretty pearls of your teeth. Admiring the way your lips had bruised red from how eagerly he had captured your mouth. And he wouldn't dream of being anywhere else in the world right now. Not when you had looked so perfect. Hospital gown and all.

“Does that prove my point?”

He laughs. Something you had always thought to be pretty.

“Maybe.” The familiar trace of his hand had brushed past your hair. Straightening out the few loose strands that could obscure him from your face. And his smile, although back to the usual cat-like facade, had now softened up significantly upon your presence. And you had prided the way this man had looked at you like you had offered him the world.

“I'm sorry. I didn't mean to yell at ya. I just-”

“Shh..I know.” Your hand had touched his lips. Admiring the way it too, had reddened from your previous kisses.

“I'm tougher than bronze, you know? I'm not so simple as to let a few words bend me sideways.”

“Okonogi tells me the same.”

“And right she was. You should learn a thing or two from her.” And a laugh bubbles between the two of you. He had to remind himself to save his apologies later for Okonogi. For despite her absence, even now she was playing cupid for them. The small voice in his head urging him to tell you how he truly felt.

And without warning. He managed to say it outloud.

“I love you.”

Those words had struck a melodic chord in you. Ones that made you look back at him in temporary stupor. Before finally turning giddy at the way he so gently said it. No remorse. No regret. A fact even she couldn't deface as mockery. When there'd normally be a trick of a joke involved.

And in your quiet smiles held a deep admiration for him. Ones that squeezed Soshiro's hand despite the difficulty of your injuries.

But that didn't matter. Injuries heal after all. And right now, you had been far too focused on him to mind the slowly subsiding pain on your body.

“What's this all of a sudden? You're not joking are you?” You ask cautiously. Though a smile still remained on your face. Far too elated at hearing those words. And from the look on his face, you could tell he had been serious in his admission.

“It's not sudden. I just–” Soshiro lets out a small chuckle. Not entirely sure why he feels so nervous in the wake of your question.

“I meant to say it that day. Before the Kaiju attacked. I wanted it to be perfect for ya and..” His voice stops when you lean in. Cuddling him down as best you could in the safety of the hospital's bedsheets. The understanding look in your eyes had all but told him that you knew. And it makes him think twice about having to explain things to you again. Not when you could now read him so well. Especially in the most important aspects of his life.

“I know. You don't need to tell me twice."

He heard you speak. Though the hint of playfulness in your voice hadn't subsided. A reminder that you had been slowly regaining your strength. And pretty soon, you'd be pulling him down by the collar just to kiss him breathless if you wanted to.

But for now, he was gonna have to take care of you. Take the lead and deal with your smart comments. And it makes him smile knowing he'd get to hear such witty banters from you again. More so now that you were awake.

“Really now? And I thought you'd be happy to have me say it outloud for ya.”

His chuckle had made his chest rumble. And you could feel the pleasant vibration as your head fell squarely on his chest. A roll in your eyes as you had hummed in reply.

“Well…I suppose it couldn't hurt for you to say it again.”

And he would. He'd do it as long as you'd allow him that privilege.

And this time, he too had read you like an open book. Somehow fitting perfectly in the way they understand the other without needing to speak. They needed to work on it. They needed each other more than ever before.

So it was lucky their bonds were more lasting than bronze. And fate had brought them together.

[caturnmoon]

Astrology Observations #6️⃣

♍️ Happy Virgo Season!! ♍️

🌱Virgo rising is a super underrated beauty placement in my opinion. Virgo is ruled by the maiden archetype, and physical hallmarks attributed to Virgo are that soft, doe eyed, effortless beauty for women and boyish good looks for men. They take pride in their wellness routines unless the chart indicates otherwise, and cleanliness and grooming take priority too. They always have this effortlessly put together beauty about them. Queens of the “clean girl” aesthetic. A lot of celebrities and models have heavy Virgo influence. Ex: Brooke Shields, Blake Lively, Beyonce

🌱Mercury Pluto aspects and always feeling like their mind is a scary place to be. They can struggle with mental health in general, but can also have AMAZING laser lock focus too. The expression, “You can do anything you set your mind to.” definitely comes to mind at its most positively expressed.

🌱Having the asteroid Fama in Virgo could indicate being famous/well-known for anything that you’re really good at. Virgo’s are known for their attention to detail and work ethics, so depending on the house it’s placed in, this area could be a natural talent for you and something you’re “famous” for.

🌱Gemini over the 6th house could indicate multiple jobs and not holding one job down for too long due to boredom. You need constant mental stimulation, so if your work doesn’t provide this, then you’ll be looking for the next best thing elsewhere. Creating a podcast could really appeal to you as well since Gemini rules oral communication. You’re most likely known as phenomenal multi-tasker in your everyday life and routines!

🌱Part of fortune in the 6th house could bless you with wonderful health and longevity. You probably don’t get sick that often and heal quickly too.

🌱Scorpio moons no matter how extroverted they may be if their chart supports this, value privacy over everything. They feel most secure when their privacy is respected and made top priority. If it’s in the 8th, 4th or 12th houses then this is even more emphasized. Needs solitude to decompress.

🌱Look to what phase the moon was in when you were born as well for added elements to your chart! I interpret the phase in correlation to my moon sign and the nature of it. it makes a lot of sense. I’m an Aries moon born during a waxing gibbous moon; the cusp before the full moon. Aries is fiery, assertive, and headstrong ready to charge forward. Waxing gibbous moons symbolize consolidating gains, moving forward and preparing for forward momentum before the full moon.

🌱Have a lot of 7th house activity? Your focus is developing (and learning what it takes to maintain) relationships in this lifetime. Give and take, compromise, and boundaries will be repeated themes and lessons for you to learn this time around.

🌱Having the 22nd degree (the Capricorn “kill or be killed” degree) can indicate immense potential for success and notoriety. In my opinion, this can be a very underrated fame degree.

🌱Having the rectangle pattern in your natal chart can indicate a strong pull towards making a difference in the world and being given all of the tools in order to make that happen while you’re here. This pattern is rare, and is made up of two oppositions connected with two trines and two sextiles. These aspects support and complement each other providing stability necessary to fulfill your life purpose and calling with relative ease.

🌱Pisces Mercury could have such profound imaginations and thrive at communicating through creativity of any kind. Keeping a dream journal may be beneficial for you too!

Until next time!!🖖🏼👽

[tswwwit]

familiar!au thoughts:

i've been mentally handwaving all of dipper's reincarnations having the same names, bc it would just be confusing to read, if they didn't (and bc tbh i feel like bill would just ignore it anyway, lmao. this is pine tree! that's all that matters. what, is bill supposed to remember whatever dumb new thing his mortal parents have named him every lifetime?)

HOWEVER, a funny alternative- do you think, after bill & dipper have gained enough notoriety for dipper to be recognized as a Big Heroic Demon Hunter, there's a sudden spike in people naming their kids "mason", and/or "dipper" becomes a new & notable given name?? are there magical families out there naming their baby boys mason or dipper, in the hope that they'll grow up to be powerful practitioners, or that they'll be especially resistant to demonic temptation? (lol. lmao, even.)

second: imagine familiar-verse's pop culture landscape once enough time has passed that bill & his mortal have passed into legend. 😭 what do you think it's like to be a teenager growing up in the Between Times, when there's mythologized history, daytime TV dramas, and bad historical romance novels about these two?

do you think there's like, tiktoks about how to tell if you're regaining past memories in dreams, of your time as bill's mortal? IG reels of kids who have Wildly misunderstood the situation, w/ captions like "13th bday, i think my birthmark is finally starting to come in?!! 🤯😱 #ChosenMortal #BeastWithOneEye #WelcomeBackDipper" and the comments are full of people going "bestie that is a rash, please go to the doctor 🙏😭"

Thank you for accepting my handwaving of Dipper's name in the reincarnations! A majority is of course the readability and understanding it's the same guy, but bit of it is 'I don't wanna come up with new names for each one'. I also agree with 'Mason' and 'Dipper' becoming much more common after Dipper's first life! Turns out he made quite the impression. That'll happen when you're a clever guy with the full power of Bill Cipher behind your spellcraft. God, though. The cultural phenomenon behind this weird Demon Bond. With how little information the public has on how things went down, imagine all the fictional interpretations. Dramas, of course. Soap operas, even! Horror movies! Tons of different versions of what happened! Of course there's tweens daydreaming about being next, it's a Pretty Cool Thing to happen to someone - if you don't know Bill very well. I will also take your rash story and invite another possibility - A Dipper who thinks he's totally gotten away scot-free from any involvement with Bill. After all, he doesn't have the birthmark.

Only to wake up one day, wash his face at the sink, and look up to see the damn birthmark plastered right on his forehead.

[buggysangel17]

Dissolution

Summary: The abolishment of the Seven Warlords has finally come, but it seems Mihawk is no longer alone in cleaning up the mess that the Marine has placed upon him. Characters: Dracule Mihawk x Wife!Female Reader (Amihan) Word Count: 926 Chapter Warnings:  None divider by: @cafekitsune

Masterlist | Series Masterlist || Send Me An Ask?

“Your people’s debt is paid and there is a ship already waiting for you with everything you would need for your journey back to your island.”

There was a mix of sadness in the very root of Mihawk’s system as he stared as his wife, no, you were not his wife. Not in the way he would have hoped you to be one at least. You were a companion to him, a woman that was taken as collateral but had grown so fond of.

But there was also the excitement that never truly left him, not just for the Marine’s eventual arrival to take him away, but it was the excitement of the day that would come where he would see you again, on a much different circumstance than what was initially given to the both of you.

Maybe in another life, if the circumstance was in both of your favor. He would have loved to have you as his wife and profess his devotion to you in a way that you deserved. But it wasn’t in this moment, he loved you too much to allow you to be involved in the crossfire with the Marines.

“What are you talking about?”

The sound of the siren echoed through the outside walls of the castle. It was time.

“Surrender yourself now! “Hawk-eye” Mihawk!”

There was a trembling coursing through his fingers as he finally held onto his sword. But he wasn’t worried about himself, more worried about you. He placed his hat back on as he looked at you, genuinely looked up at you from where he sat.

This was the very thing that he loved so much about you. You feared nothing, the moment he had arrived at your island you held a sword right onto his neck, unfazed by his notoriety and the death that paved his way. You looked at him without fear and without doubt. He was certain that you would fight now if he so much as asked you, but he wouldn’t. He didn’t allow such a burden to also be placed on your shoulders because of him. It was too much that he had taken you away from your family. He will not allow for you to also take your life away that was all too precious to him.

“You need to leave, the Marines will be after me and I am uncertain if I will be able to keep you safe during the fight.”

It was his fear, more than you being a burden to him in this moment. He did not have the heart to allow you to be placed in the middle of all of this. He had feared that should either of you be able to escape this, the Marines would also place a bounty on your head, a target on your back that he no longer had the power to absolve you of.

“I’m not leaving.” Your voice held no hesitation as you tore the floor length dress you had on.

His brow quirked in wonder with what you had planned. Watching you dismantle one of your dresses’ skirt until it now reached above your knees, and the sleeves were haphazardly torn off without much effort much to his surprise. But then again, you were truly full of surprise.

“Am I your wife, Mihawk?” You inquired, voice never once wavered as your eyes stared onto the window, the blaring lights of the impending attack of the Marines were drawing near.

“You are.”

“Then as your wife, I will stand by you, when death takes my hand, I will hold you with the other and promise to find you in every lifetime.”

It was a vow, a vow that has never once escaped your lips during your arranged ceremony all those years ago. But you spoke of it as if it was a vow you had made since the beginning.

“But you can’t fight them with what they have in store. We have not yet trained you to your true potential.”

You smiled, holding onto his sword for a moment but he held onto it tighter but his eyes lingered on your skin as you held onto the base, A black essence had seeped through your skin and into your veins from just holding onto his sword. His eyes narrowed as you pulled away and your eyes turned to look at him.

“I know it’s far too late to explain myself now, but the Devil fruit that my people have been hiding for so long isn’t placed in a secured place as you had once believed.”

Taking a step back, he had watched you place your palms together, watching the black essences move upward to your palm and as your opened your hands, a sword quite similar to his own slowly materialized from your palms.

“I’ve already eaten the Ken Ken No Mi.” You confessed. “That’s the reason why my family has been isolating me from the world since I was a child.” You continued holding the sword in a stance that he would have never expected from you.

You held onto the sword in your hand. The exact replica of his Yoru sword gleamed ominously, and she wielded it with a grace that defied belief, even for someone like him, deemed the greatest Swordsman known to man.

“Aren’t you full of surprise, My Dear?” He chuckled finally standing up realizing that the circumstance would become more entertaining indeed.

“Isn’t that why you agreed to marry me, Dear Husband?” You quipped right back.

“Touché, my love. Touché.”

[phantomsies]

𝖓𝖎𝖌𝖍𝖙𝖘 𝖑𝖎𝖐𝖊 𝖙𝖍𝖎𝖘 | 𝖆. 𝖆𝖗𝖙𝖑𝖊𝖗𝖙

spending the evening with a man who could have any girl he wants but he proves why it’s always been you…

producer/nepobaby armin, musician au, black fem reader, dancer!reader (reader is in Pole Assassins), soft sex, back scratching, lots of intimacy, slow kissing, oral sex (f. receiving) body worship, banter between armin and reader, missionary, creampie, slow build/burn (?)

I’ve been suffering from a severe case of armin brain rot lately and I’ve been missing the musician au even more!! this is a reupload from my patreon so if you read this, no you didn’t! 🫶🏾

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He’d traveled the world once over…experienced a lifetime full of adventures at only a mere two decades into his life. From sailing on yachts as a child, exploring the ocean in between piano lessons and algebra courses…to making music with his friends that would touch the lives of people in every nation and becoming a household name in the process. However, Armin Artlert’s notoriety had transcended that of just playlists and edits by adoring fans. He harbored a reputation that had come to precede him throughout his duration as an artist and internet sensation. The infamous ArminHammer was notorious for two things: iconic instrumentals and his expansive roster of women. Every girl of every variety was at his disposable..models, strippers, actresses, singers, the single mom who happened to attend one of their shows and needed a good time. He wasn’t picky nor did he allow preference to stand in the way of fulfilling his carnal desires. Make no mistake, he didn’t dog his women out or harm them..hell, if anything, he made every girl he encountered feel like a princess. Spoiling them with gifts, expensive dinners and of course, the best sex you’d ever experience! To put it even more bluntly, the man fucked like a professional..he was skilled in many areas and the bedroom happened to be the top.

But perhaps, that was the issue…he was the ideal man in every essence of the word. He’d make any lady feel as if she’d met her prince charming!..

….so how could you ever believe him when he said that you were the one he’d been searching for this entire time?

How could you possibly think that you’d be the sole object of his affection when it seemed those regards could be said of any women who’d crossed his path? Honestly, there was no definite answer to convince you otherwise. Armin was aware that you’d always kept your ear to the streets and had been informed about how he operated. That was all but confirmed when your teammate and friend began dating his childhood homie. Another infamous artist by the name of EJ the Don. Much like the woman who had founded the very group you were a part of, the Pole Assassins, EJ was seen as the proverbial leader of his own collective, Dead Boys Society and although they both despised the labels, you still respected her as such.

you could also sense that Armin held the same regard for his best friend and fellow artist. He looked up to Eren and admired how focused, driven and goal oriented he was in his craft. Most importantly though, he admired the way he loved..

EJ was never known to be a romantic nor was he known to be entrenched in the dating scene, but once he began dating your team mate, he had transitioned into an entirely different man. One that was attentive, doting and even a little jealous. He was openly affectionate with her and never thought twice about it. Gushing about her in interviews, where prior, he would’ve never even mentioned a woman besides his mom. It was that complete switch that had activated something within Armin as well. What he had been seeking in multiple girls could only be found in one place and that was with (y/n) (l/n). He’d spent all this time around you and had found himself falling deeper for you than he had anyone else. Your laugh, your energy, your spirit and kind heart had all enraptured the heart of the notorious playboy. And you couldn’t fool yourself either..you’d become smitten with him just the same…however, you were guarded. You weren’t so far deluded in the fantasy of being with him that you’d soon forgotten his reputation! You weren’t perfect by a long shot either..God knows, you’d partaken in your fair share of hookups and dated a couple of athletes just to say you did. Even so, you felt a hint of insecurity. How could you ever satisfy his cravings when he’d sampled the whole platter?! That was a question you’d soon find the answer to when you decided to spend a weekend at his home. A lofty, luxurious penthouse that overlooked the city and beaches of the sunny Miami, Florida.

it was a beautiful place and one of the many pieces of real estate owned by the Artlert conglomerate. One thing you’d come to learn about Armin was that music was nothing more than a beloved hobby. As much as he poured into his craft, his financial situation wouldn’t waver in the slightest if he were to stop today. He’d grown up with billionaires for family and that generational wealth had certainly trickled down. Regardless, it wasn’t his sole identity, hence why it’d never arise in conversation. It was blatantly obvious in his lifestyle choices but he was still that innocent, nerdy, wide eyed boy he’d always been to his core. The sensitive, kind, gentle Armin that only a select few witnessed. That was the side he wanted you to see here tonight..

so as you traipsed across the marble accented floors and art littered walls of his penthouse..all the way to his bedroom, you’d realize that you were where you belonged.

“You coming to lie down, beautiful? You’ve been in there forever.”

“Just a few more minutes, I promise! I wanna make sure I’m looking right.”

honestly, he didn’t understand all of the trouble. He’d seen you fully nude and completely clothed..you were beautiful no matter the form. Hell, you could come out in a plastic bag and pair of Timberlands and he’d still be hungry for you! He loved you dearly and nothing could dare to change that fact now! But after you two had retreated to his bedroom after an evening out on the town and he’d longed since undressed, you insisted on going to the bathroom and freshening up with a shower before retreating to bed. However, there was one more

“Well hurry up, please. I miss you..” stating in a whiny tone as he flailed himself against the mattress. Arms stretched out atop the pillow as his shirtless top half grazed the sheets. His designer boxers rubbed viciously with the silk bed linen, causing a bit of friction. Outside of the glass window pane, fell heavy droplets of pouring rain to set the already sensual mood. Electronic candles flickered in the corner and soft melodies of R&B played from the mounted television. It was certainly a vibe that you could become accustomed to. Across from where he lay, sat a half empty bottle of Modavi and two glasses that had been previously filled with the liquid. You were both feeling a bit tipsy from the substances coursing your veins so it was apparent what the mood was for the evening. He couldn’t bear to wait a moment longer and fortunately for him, you didn’t keep him held up. Because it was as he was getting ready to lie back down, he’d hear the faint tapping of footsteps against the tile and be greeted with a sight that would soothe his soul and sore eyes alike…

“Well I’m sorry to keep you waiting ..” flashing him a cheeky smile in regards to his earlier comment. Instantly, his jaw fell slack and his top half arose from the bed to examine you over.

“Oh my—you look—…. damn, I can’t even talk. You got me speechless, girl.”

sending you into a fit of giggles as you showed off your ensemble for him. A sheer white, lace two piece with garters that wrapped your thick thighs, a thong that was swallowed up by those round cheeks and a bra that accentuated your voluptuous breasts..causing them to sit upright. You were glistening with oil, and that luscious brown skin shimmered in the candlelight. Those forty inches of black curls were styled into an updo atop your head, along with that diamond necklace he had procured for you a few weeks ago. Even this was a first for Armin..he’d spent his fair share of evenings with the ladies but it always involved moments of rushed disrobing and him trying to get in their pants as quickly as possible. He didn’t waste time with lingerie or fancy frills because the goal was to grant her the best sex possible. Of course, he obtained gratification from this as well..but sometimes, he craved more. More than just the act of sex itself…it was intimacy he desired. The subtle touches and little gestures that helped to curate that special moment..he wanted to take his time and give you an experience that you’d soon yet forget.

“..then I guess it was worth the trouble..” his reaction elicited a light chuckle as you veered over to the bed, crawling onto the mattress and into the embrace of your precious lover. It was warm, inviting almost…strangely enough, an unwavering sense of safety crept over you as well. All of those previous thoughts of insecurity and jealousy seemed to dissipate once his hands coiled your body. He’d pull you in a little closer, squeeze you a little tighter and when his lips finally clashed with your own, every worry that had plagued either of your worlds were mere afterthoughts.

“God, you’re so beautiful..I swear you wear the hell out of everything you put on..”

“You’re too charming for your own good, you know that? It’s gon’ get you in trouble one day.”

“I like the sound of that.”

the tender and humorous moment was shared underneath the flickering candlelight as your flesh melded into one. Sitting upright in a cross legged position, your calves coiled his lower back and your arms cradled the back of his neck. Meanwhile, his hands resided around your waist and maintained a firm grip. He could hear your sentiment but even he grew skeptical at times. He often worried would his past elude him and ruin any potential future he could procure with you. All of his other prospects were nothing more than fleeting memories now. Even for someone as confident and skilled as Armin was, he experienced any other emotion just the same..maybe even more. Regardless, you’d continue to quell his anxiety and ease any doubt in his mind that you were leaving anytime soon. With those soft touches and gentle kisses, slowly but surely, you’d melt away all that rattled his mind. Eventually, your tongues would find home within one another’s mouths, initiating a series of sloppy pecks in process. It was then that you’d also begin to feel the thin straps of that top gliding down your shoulder blade. He just wanted to make you feel the best you had in a long time and he’d take as long as he needed to fulfill that obligation. He owed it to you for all of the insurmountable love you’d given him.

“Armin…baby..”

a faint whisper escaped your now freed lips as he latched onto your neck following the broken kiss. He’d gently suckle on that deep colored flesh and leave a trail of pecks along your jugular vein, even along your earlobe…it was there that he’d merely nip at the skin and whisper into it. Which sent a barrage of tingles all over your body.

“Yes, sweetheart? Something on your mind?”

“Ahh—“ “..words, baby. Let me hear that shit.”

that lilt in his tone, a clear indicator that he was going to relentlessly tease you from here on out. You always became so anxious when he did but the buildup made the actual moments all the more worth it. “You can tell me anything you want, pretty girl. This is all for you..your space. Whatever you say…I’ll do it.” His words serve to entice you further, which took little to no effort at all. You were already sucked in with no chance of being free of his clutches anytime soon. As for your requests, it was easy.

“Just…make me feel good, please..make love to me..”

it was a definite statement; one he understood loud and clear. Now wasn’t the time to be prideful or allow his ego to cloud his perception. Rather than showing off, Armin wanted to fully submit himself to you and to the cause of giving you whatever your heart…and body desired. With that, you’d find yourself shrouded in another round of kisses, this time along your shoulder blades and eventually to those soft breasts. Gently kneading them between his fingertips, he’d circle the buds with his thumb and watch as they’d grow erect. “Mmmm..” “..that feels good, sweetheart?” Following his question with a whimpering nod as you examined his movements. He’d gently squeeze them together and massage them all over, just to make you feel more at ease. He always did love how supple and perky they were..how they sat so perfectly in your tops or dresses. He’d learned to view the female body as more than just a vessel of pleasure but instead, for the work of art it is. You were his divine masterpiece..his treasure and he wanted to appreciate every single square inch of your physique. Even the areas you didn’t exactly appreciate yourself…

“Good..I know how sensitive they are but that’s okay. I’ll be gentle.” Chuckling at your very visible reactions of having your nipples played with. It was your most erogenous area and he knew it’d only be a matter of time before you became even more aroused. That much was indicated by the way you ground your clothed slit into the mattress. (Y/N) eventually tossed your head back, rolling it onto your shoulders and emitting a sharp gasp. An expected reaction to all of the sensual friction and stimulation. None of which was lost on Armin. He’d shift a bit in his own positioning, attempting to conceal that obvious erect. This was a fine solely for your pleasure and needs. His urges could wait as far as he was concerned. He was determined to prove that he was fully and utterly devoted to you right now. The sounds of melodic love songs and pouring rain would continue to serve as the soundtrack to this precious moment. Right along with your sweet moans and his subtle grunts. You’d glance down to see the rising tent within his boxers as he began to lap all over your areolae and suckle on your brown buds. “Your tits are so perfect, angel. I love them so much..I love all of you. Every single part..” Constantly doting as he persisted..that’s when you’d reach down and grasp for that sheathed cock but he’d be equally as quick to stop you.

“Ignore it, okay? Right now is about you. I’m focused on making you feel good, just like I promised. You don’t need to do a thing.” This was what you appreciate about your man. He had such a calm, gentle demeanor. Something people would often mistake as sensitive or meek. But in the same vein, he could harness that into a dominant, masculine energy that required no assertiveness. You felt safe..secure within that space. You felt comfortable submitting yourself fully to him.

“It’s like you're everything I’ve ever prayed for..I’m so lucky.” Akin to that of a groom bedding his bride on the night of their wedding, Armin would lie his precious girl flat against the mattress and begin his descent down your body. Examining each line, touching each bump and worshiping every curve as if they were a gift from the heavens above. They certainly weren’t things that he took for granted. Especially when he finally made home with that divine center…spreading open your trembling thighs; courtesy of the gentle kisses and drawn out licksthat had been peppered all over your belly. “Mmmm…I love when you touch me like this. You always know what to do..” placing his thumbs along your pantyline, he’d rub your hips before placing two fingertips along the seat of your bottoms. “Of course, I told you…I’ll do whatever you want. All you gotta do is say it.” Naturally, the entire area was soaked and only accruing more stickiness the more he stroked your clothed bud. In an attempt to increase the friction and pleasure riddling your body, Armin would hone in on the clit and massage it until he felt you shaking in his grasp.

“Oh my God..” “Rub your nipples for me, sweetheart. I wanna see you get there so bad but I don’t want to rush..not right now.” Finally, he’d cease his teasing and peel back that thin layer of fabric, revealing your plump mound and lips, along with that swollen clit. You were practically throbbing and the second he grazed your skin, you’d instinctively contract. Those juices were already leaking before he could even think to touch or lap at the area. Meanwhile, you’d pinch and pull at the now stiffened buds on your chest, writhing in the sheets as you chewed at your lip. “You’re so cute when you make that face.” Chuckling whilst teasing the hard little pearl that had caused your entire body to heat up. “Aw, you just want that nut, don’t you, baby?” “Fuck—uh, yes..please.” Immediately shuttering at the idea of ruining such a sensual moment with profanity. However, Armin didn’t mind at all. In fact, it further encouraged him to get you there. “I know you do…I wanna give it to you so bad too..”

Normally, this was an opportunity he’d utilize to tease you relentlessly. Holding out on providing you with your orgasm, making you wait before he even made the slightest of movements…all of it in an attempt to get you riled up. Right there on the edge until you finally broke, all but pleading with him to give you what you wanted. But tonight?

“Ahh!—haaaa..yes..” “Uh, fuck…lemme taste you…please lemme eat this puss—“ his words trailing off into mere whiny drabble as his lips made home on your lower ones. Immediately, those pretty blue eyes of his were fixated on you as he delved into your center. The sounds of slurping and whimpering emitting from his mouth and only growing louder. With your legs parted on each side, (y/n) grasped the top of Armin’s head; clawing at those shaggy blonde curls whilst grinding yourself against his face. “Arminnnn…oh my gosh…right there.” Those moans would draw out into a high pitched wail. One that caused your legs to tremble and nearly retract around his head. But alas, that just wasn’t possible. With one fell swoop and only a single hand, he’d pin your thighs back and continue devouring your cunt. As his opposite one was preoccupied with stroking his own shaft. It was something about your scent, flavor and your sex that got him all aroused. Nonetheless, Armin would resume his feast..flicking gently on your clit, sucking your plump lips and even shoving a digit into your tight hole. Only coming up for air to check in on you..

“Something on your mind, pretty girl? Talk to me..”

“N—need you…need you in me so bad…oh fuck..”

although the sentence was a bit incoherent, your desires were heard loud and clear. Although Armin loved the idea of relentlessly teasing you, he also wasn’t much in the way of restricting you from your happiness either. If that was what you wanted, he was elated to fulfill the request. In what seemed to almost be a slight of hand movement, he’d maneuver and rise from where he was laying and would scoop your legs up in the process. He’d position them straight in the air and pin them together. Eventually placing them over his shoulder. “You need me? You want it that bad, sweetheart?” Cooing and questioning with a rhetorical tone. Meanwhile, he was hovering above you, positioned on his knees whilst that cock head teased against your slit. He already knew the answer and as far as he was concerned, it was yours. But he needed to hear you say it. Not just for the consensual aspect, but because it was what he’d been waiting for all along. Hearing you beg, plead and whimper for him….this entire time, he’d been so used to your independent nature, that there was rarely an instance where you relied on him. You were so far capable of handling your own, that he or no other man were truly necessary in your daily way of life. But right here…in this moment, in this bedroom and this space the two of you had curated together..

“Y-yes, please!..I need you. I can’t take it..”

he was your everything. Your one and only sole object of affection. With your gazes fixated on one another, you’d nod your head and coo to one another, whimpering until suddenly—

“Yeah?” “Mmmm…please!”

you’d feel that stiffened, aching cock glide between your warm, silky folds and remained nestled there whilst he gathered his footing. Normally, he’d take an opportunity to perhaps gloat or be cocky. Fucking you with a giant grin on his face, making your pleasure a second priority. But alas, he’d never be so arrogant or foolish right now..because only moments later, his head had rolled back on his shoulders and as he remained nestled within you, he’d release a heavy gasp. He couldn’t maintain his eye contact when you felt this good. Your pussy resembled that of a warm blanket or hug..inviting him in and never wanting to pull away. However, he’d refrain from such lewd obscenities and fill your head with more loving compliments instead. As you’d lie there, awaiting his next move, you’d feel a hand planted into the center of your tummy and his hips beginning to buck forward..gently pounding into you.

“Oh God…yes..I love the way you feel, baby. You’re so warm.. ‘s so good..”

meanwhile, all he could do was howl it to the air because he knew that if he even took so much as even a glance in your direction, his load would be buried three inches into your womb right now. He was adamant of taking his time because all of his undivided and full attention; along with every second he could spare…belonged to you. He was all yours, hopelessly to a fault. He had released fear..anxiety or the shame that came with being madly in love.

“Ahhh…Armin..right there..please don’t stop..”

“I know, baby. I know…I can feel you squeezing me, that’s your spot, isn’t it?”

it was a given..not only had your body become riddled with ecstasy but he could tell by the way you pawed at his abs that he’d reached that core. Smacking sounds had arisen from the creamy mess he’d made of your lower half. Sucking his teeth, Armin finally garnered the strength to peer down at you and once he did, he nearly lost all control and restraint. His strokes would become a little faster and stretch your tight little cunt in the process. Your legs, that once made home on his shoulders, were now pinned back nearly behind your head. A position he was certain you had no issue maintaining. Even so, it didn’t stop your from crying out to him..heaving and whimpering. He was worried that perhaps, he hadn’t regulated his own strength. But rather than an expression of pain, you were smiling!..grinning from ear to ear with tears rolling down your face. It was a sign that you were in complete climatic bliss.

“Y-yes..you're in my spot, baby. And it feels so fucking good…nobody can make me feel like this..” eventually reaching down to stroke your sensitive bud to aid in the pleasure. That gave him all the confirmation he needed to persist, even when he felt he’d reach his breaking point sooner rather than later. Breaking into a smile of his own, Armin would resume his deep thrusts, this time with a bit more speed and rhythm. His hips would roll fluidly as he pushed in and out; dragging more of your juices and secretions along with him. He felt as if he could conquer the world when you said things like that. “That’s right, sweetheart..I know it’s a lot but I know you’re the only one who can handle it..who can take this dick like it’s nothing.”

those words cause you to twitch and grip him even tighter. In that moment, he nearly faltered but it was also in that instance that the two of you established full blown eye contact and mere seconds later, your lips had met in a passionate crash. Only after you exchanged doting words.

“..I love you. I love you so much, (y/n)..”

“I love you too, baby! Oh my gosh, please don’t stop.”

the bed had begun to jolt against the wall whilst his tattooed knuckles gripped the headboard. Eventually, he’d collapse fully into your grasp, relinquishing this idea of full control and allowing himself to be a part of the moment. No need to establish dominance or submission..who was the better lover or even what past partners had done. But instead, embracing each other and becoming one. One body, one soul and one heart. You’d wrap your arms and legs around his frame as he continued feeding you those strokes..his face buried into the crook of your neck and your hands clawing his inked up back.. You’d coo into his ear, listening to his whimpers and inform him that it was okay for him to let go. That he didn’t have to hold back so that he could appear as this strong guy with tons of stamina. You took it as a compliment that he could go for that long, honestly..it was a far cry from his past hookups, that was for certain!..but so much more was at stake here than merely who reached their orgasm first. It was about sharing in ecstasy and concealing your love with a special moment.

“You wanna come, angel? You can if you’re ready, no need to hold back..”

“Come with me, please..same time, okay?”

declaring so confidently as you heaved into one another’s ears. He’d agree and mere seconds later, that speed and pace had reached maximum heights and it felt as if he were hammering into you. “F-fuck!..” “Shit!..I’m coming, sweetheart!..coming for y—“ it was in that exact moment, that it felt as if the world was shattering for the both of you. That something inside of your bodies had essentially broken and neither of you could hold back. Both of your eyes shoot wide open before they shut and you’d embrace each other for comfort. Your juices had splattered all over his cock and his warm seed had completely coated the inside of your womb.. neither of you could even function at this point. Just reduced to mindless babble and tears. He’d finally rise from your neck and greet you with disheveled hair, a beet red face and a toothy grin. Along with those fallen tears.

“C’mere..I need a kiss..”

“Of course..”

your soft features and brown eyes met his and the two of you collided with one last declaration of adornment. Lips and tongues meeting in a fit of desperation. Desperation to never be apart again. For as long as you were both of this world, you’d spend every waking moment wanting to be together. And there wasn’t a single thing that could break that.

“You have no idea how much you mean to me..I just want us to be like this forever. I love you..” and you’d cling to every single word. Knowing that they rang true, now more than ever. Stroking his head as he lies on your chest. There were times that Armin figured that he’d never find his one and only..that he was destined to be a bachelor until he left this earth and he was adamant that one woman couldn’t possibly supplement for having his fill of multiple.

“And we can stay just like this…I’m not going anywhere.”

but it was nights like this..that reminded him that he was exactly where he needed to be!

[child-of-the-danube]

I might just be biased, but I truly fail to understand how people see Agatha as a villain. Anti-hero and morally dubious perhaps, but villain no. I'm absolutely not saying she's perfect. That woman is deeply flawed and fucked up, but evil is not what I'd describe her as.

People keep putting emphasis on her being a killer. I guess we'll see it in a flashback episode but by now the only people Agatha "murdered" that we know of were all due to the inability to control her powers. The Salemites and Evanora knew and they still tried to attack her like the dumb cunts they are while she was screaming that she can't control it. Alice was an accident caused by her dipshit mother who's 100% to blame for what Agatha turned out like. The most evil thing we've seen her do both in WandaVision and Agatha All Along came with the relevation that she controlled Ralph (on top of him being controlled by Wanda), making him poison Sparky, and using the twins as bait for Wanda.

Is she self centered and cunning? Absolutely. But she's mostly acting like a wounded animal seeking refuge. After a lifetime of coming across people who from the start refuse to give you a chance, and not only that, but try to actively take you out, who wouldn't be? Her powers have been a thing of notoriety and people still fucking decide to attack her. Quite frankly, that's on them. Agatha's primary tactic is literally being annoying and for centuries people keep falling for it by not stopping and thinking for a second (except Lilia apparently in episode 2).

We accepted Wanda as a deeply flawed, traumatized person who did what she did, which was by all means torturous and left permanent mental scars on the citizens of Westview, out of colossal grief, childhood trauma, personal desires and her own inability to control her feelings and powers and did not mark her as evil, but Agatha going through similar trauma (which lasted, mind you, centuries longer than Wanda's) and doing similar things is irredeemable?

Yeah, I don't fuck with that.

[evita-shelby]

Vēnor

latin: Chase, Hunt

Brilliant Chang meets a happily divorced Eva after the events of Look Both Ways and the The Wreckage

cw: failed relationships, mentions of drug use, murder, mentions of sex and Eva’s slight god complex

Lucy Winters belongs to @emotionalcadaver

taglist @justrainandcoffee @zablife @thegreatdragonfruta @hoodeddreams13 @novashelby @kmc1989

She likes to play games.

After her disastrous marriage to Tommy, her subsequent divorce and failed attempts to rekindle that spark since Lucy had up and left anyways, Eva decided to keep up her game with the Chinaman who thinks her easy prey.

It is his way of gaining clients and even dealers for his cocaine. He romances and seduces his prey and before they know it, they’re dealing drugs with their brains turned to mush to get a crumb of his attention. Freda Kempton would not be the last of his victims.

Brilliant Chang, the Dope King of London.

Handsome, cultured and not at all put off by the existence of the witch’s two-year-old son and that her divorce doesn’t mean she’s no longer a Shelby. Chang’s last invitation had come while shopping at his warehouse with little Charlie on her hip, Tommy getting on her last nerve and, like his attempts before, a gift to show his interest.

Eva wanted to get him to leave his private room and try to woo her where everyone would see him. After all, she isn’t interested in his drugs, the last time she had cocaine it drove her to attempt suicide and Eva refuses to go back there at all costs.

She wants to fuck him, plain and simple.

Now that her divorce has given her some notoriety, freedom and a wide selection to choose from, the witch wants to take her time finding someone who would accept her terms and conditions.

There are many universes and lifetimes where that man is Tommy Shelby, but in this one, he, sadly, is not.

“Tell Mr. Chang if he wants someone who goes to him when he orders it, he should get a dog.” Eva tells the waiter who finds her refusal alarming and does not stop her from leaving even if her meal has yet to even arrive.

Much like Tommy Shelby, Billy Chang is far too used to having women be too easy to get. Rejection was not something they were used to; Tommy seeking her to fill the space Lucy left and Chang’s invitations these past months were proof of that.

The waiter goes into the private room from where the king observes his kingdom and relates her words to him. This time she had sent an unflattering comment, the previous ones were a simple no.

Eva leaves knowing the next time she comes; he will be waiting here for her.

“You play well, Mrs. Shelby.” Brillian Chang is dressed finely with a fur coat worth as much as her wedding ring and sitting at the table he always has open for her. There is no menu, why would there be when the man has spent the past year studying her?

It is simply tea with small plates of food. Dim Sum the waitress had called it the first time. Or was it Yum Cha?

“Your strategy merited a harder game.” The Mexican witch sat down knowing all the whispering around them is about them. Billy Chang hardly leaves his private room, just as the Shelbys hardly leave the snug at the Garrison. To see him come out for a woman when the others went to him is enough to cause a stir.

“Or perhaps I let you win.” He admits with his eyes roaming her as if she were the meal set out before them.

Been so long since a man’s been bold enough to desire her so openly. Many still feared the man she was married to even here in London ---or did when Tommy got it in his head that despite fucking up the best damn thing in his life, he believed he had any fucking right to impose his will on her.

Tommy no longer satisfied her, too much hurt, too much anger for putting them in this situation in the first place and unwilling to move on like she had.

He had a choice, her or Lucy. Because he couldn’t decide, the witch made the choice for him and now the Romani gangster gets a front row seat to his ex-wife seeking her pleasure with whomever she wants.

Brilliant Chang had no idea how attractive he became to her when his way of flirting with her pricked Tommy’s jealous streak and her ex-husband told her of how the man here killed Freda Kempton.

He is using you to get to me, Tommy had wagged his finger at her and demanded she stop going to Chang’s warehouses and teahouse in Regent Street.

Eva had half a mind to tell him where Lucy was hiding just so he’d fuck off, but Lucy needed to learn who she was outside of Tommy’s orbit and see if she’d still choose him afterwards. The witch couldn’t drag her nor Tommy kicking and screaming to a shrink, traveling with a Romani family wholly unconnected to the Shelbys should do the trick.

“And yet I got what I wanted, didn’t I?” the witch shuts the door to her past and focuses on the present and the near future where this man shows her why all those women fall under his spell so easily.

His place, she doesn’t want to risk Charlie interrupting him or, worse, Tommy’s people knowing his identity too soon. Eva had even lost her tail and ditched the driver Tommy gave her for her safety with ease for the occasion.

“I see why Mr. Shelby can’t let you go, cunning as the devil and as beautiful as Venus.” He pours the tea, first her cup then his, a gesture she’s learned is a sign of respect.

Its is the tea she usually gets, had a strange name that translated to Iron Goddess or something of the sort and could pass for an English breakfast tea. Despite knowing this was all done to trap her, the witch finds it thoughtful that he would order his staff to cater to her tastes for this first meeting.

“Ex-husband.” The witch corrects as she took her cup, a finer thing like the sort of cups she has been served with since she first rejected his invitation to join him for a meal.

“Then his loss is my gain.” Chang took his own cup and drank first to show it was not tampered with. Freda Kempton had drunk water mixed with snow until it killed her, or so she’s heard.

He wasn’t out to kill her; he could’ve done it sooner. He, like her, wanted a good fuck after a good game.

He has wanted her ever since he saw her in Birmingham years ago, the dark beauty who turned heads wherever she went. Richer than God, far more beautiful than all the girls he took to his bed and, despite her penchant for dark clothing, a drop of color in cold and dreary England.

But he also knows the rumors.

She has plenty of tricks to prove she’s the real deal, from knowing the person’s entire future to turning any drink in her hands into whatever alcohol she wants. Eva is something of a Messiah in her family, the only living witch since her mother and grandmother died in 1914.

“You’ll be acquitted but your reputation will take a blow.” This was what worried him after evidence mentioned him. This would ruin him and make him the villain in every story…even if he had been at fault for playing up the dead girl’s sorrows and discarding of her after.

“I did not seek you out to know the future, but I welcome the news either way.” The businessman admits, it was obvious that he’d lose his reputation and there would not be enough evidence to charge him for her murder.

“Then what do you want?” she knows what it is, but, fuck, did she want to hear him say it.

“Everything.”

Chang knows his way with women, Eva’s not had this much fun in ages.

He took charge, fucked her until she forgets she had a kid at home and then let her tie him up as they played their games her way.

And yet that paled to how just being with him felt.

The witch missed this, this spark of connection and understanding she hadn’t felt since Tommy. That ‘there you are’ one doesn’t believe in until it happens.

And then after three years it happened again. Part of her thought she wouldn’t feel it again after Tommy.

But she has just as she told Tommy and Lucy it would.

“What is the price Shelby couldn’t pay?” Billy asks after they’ve come up with a foolproof scheme to have him acquitted and keep most of his reputation intact.

“Exclusive devotion.”

Most just say a monogamous marriage, but Eva has never felt or been seen as fully human even by her family. She is the patron saint, the jealous goddess who will rain fire and brimstone on those who incur her wrath.

Tommy hadn’t understood the fine print. Convinced that because she enjoyed one threesome and was sort of friends with his lover, Eva would make an exception. And what a mistake that had been.

Brilliant Chang weighs his options, thinks she cannot tell as they lay there in his bed while evening becomes night outside. She’d have to leave soon, can’t have Tommy waiting for her because she had been out all day.

“Can I see you again tomorrow?” he asks having concluded that she’s worth a monogamous lifestyle. A monotheistic lifestyle, he corrects himself unaware Eva can read his thoughts.

She isn’t as strict as many believe, Eva’s quite fun and willing to allow a short noncommittal fling from time to time and the occasional orgy. The witch only demands she is always the only person who owns her lover’s heart.

“You may,” Eva brushed damp hair from his face and added in between kisses, “Take me dancing, a club my ex-husband can’t get into and ruin this for me.”

[hanasnx]

Porn star Ani's rangeeeeee. I love how fleshed out his career has been, the fact that he was in the industry long enough to withstand the test of time, the fact that his porn categories age with him from fresh faced to dilf drives me insane.

He's been everything, the "barely legal" boy next door, the nerd who gets bullied into fucking a group of cheerleaders with his fat cock, when he starts to bulk up they have him playing sleazy personal trainer, mechanic who fucks sluts on their daddy's-money cars, eventually aging into best friend's dad, corrupt CEO, EVEN GAINING ENOUGH NOTORIETY TO PLAY HIMSELF, everythingggg. I just love love loveeeee coming up with porn ideas for him to star in because he's truly that guy, once in a lifetime talent, born to do it. UGHHHHHHHHGGGH endless possibilities

-doe boy

i love how you said this. “from fresh faced to dilf” like that’s exactly it. adultfilm!anakin’s only real career has been in the porn industry.

your descriptions of his jumps from trope to trope i could fucking kill because this is all stuff we’ve discussed privatedly and headcanoned and now it’s out in the open. i still remember when we talked about his skinny sam-monroe-looking-ass filling up bullying cheerleaders with his misleadingly fat cock.

the shit about being a mechanic and fucking girls in “daddy’s-money cars” holy fuck.

“hes truly that guy, once in a lifetime talent, born to do it” pornstar ani is probably my most fleshed out au in my head and i adore this take on it. you always know what to say dons

[mydaddywiki]

Marlon Brando

Physique: Heavyset Build Height: 5′ 8¾″ (1.75 m)

Marlon Brando Jr. (April 3, 1924 – July 1, 2004; aged 80) was an American actor and activist. Widely considered one of the greatest and most influential actors of all time, he received numerous accolades throughout his career, which spanned six decades, including two Academy Awards, two Golden Globe Awards, one Cannes Film Festival Award, and three British Academy Film Awards. Brando is credited with being one of the first actors to bring the Stanislavski system of acting and method acting to mainstream audiences.

In his youth Brando was an electrifyingly handsome and talented star. By the time I took notice of him, he weighed well over 300 pounds but still a handsome and talented star with some men and women still wanting to tap that. Brando's notoriety, his troubled family life, and his obesity attracted more attention than his late acting career.

Married three times, Brando was bisexual and possessed of a voracious libido and there were plenty experiences to report. He was the father to at least 11 children, three of whom were adopted. Among his partners were Burt Lancaster, Laurence Olivier, Tyrone Power, Montgomery Clift, James Dean and Rock Hudson. Hell. He even tapped Paul Newman. With all that, I wonder if he was pitching or catching. Who am I kidding. Brando was a top all the way. Having a balanced diet, his conquests also included Marilyn Monroe, Marlene Dietrich, Grace Kelly, Shelley Winters, Ava Gardner, Hedy Lamarr, Ingrid Bergman, Edith Piaf and Doris Duke (the world’s richest woman at the time). And he had a bizarre, intimate relationship with actor Wally Cox that would last a lifetime.

The last two decades of Brando's life were marked with controversy, and his troubled private life received significant attention. He struggled with mood disorders and legal issues. Brando continues to be respected and held in high regard. On July 1, 2004, Brando died of respiratory failure from pulmonary fibrosis with congestive heart failure at the UCLA Medical Center. Brando was cremated and his ashes were put in with those of Wally Cox. They were then scattered partly in Tahiti and partly in Death Valley.

RECOMMENDATIONS: Don Juan DeMarco (1994) Apocalypse Now (1979) Superman (1978) Last Tango in Paris (1972) The Godfather (1972) Mutiny on the Bounty (1962) One-Eyed Jacks (1961) On the Waterfront (1954) A Streetcar Named Desire (1951)

[ancientgoddessofegypt]

Venus in Virgo: The Winged Lovers

Venus Virgos have lifetime supply of original ideas that’ll one day be the star of the new eras to come. Their angelic wings brought down heavenly things and the world gets to view this new found design of what brings us to the new horizons. They do not hold back their wings, and show us the empire of otherworldly things. Their love for the adventure of knowing what the skies bring is what keeps us on our toes. Just like their Pisces friends, their children of the cosmos. The only difference is they’re always landing on their toes.

Venus in this sign shows a delicate soul whose attention to detail is unmatched. Their moved to the beat of their own drum and can not be swayed. You cannot manipulate someone who is adept in learning the minds of themselves and others.

Individuals with this placement are knowing that the best of the best is always around the corner , so they will never choose lesser than what they are. They can be quite picky and this can cause some annoyance. But if you knew you deserved a Bentley why would you let someone gift you a 2005 buick? It don’t matter their just not going to get into anything that doesn’t reach their standards.

This is why they’re hard to please. It’s not easy pleasing someone with so much passion. Secretive with their drive, most never see the motivated personality hidden in these wild cards. This helps for the big dreams to come into fruition faster. Magnetism in the arts and through grace is how people notice them. Patience levels must be at an all time high since their sign is in an earth sign.

What takes longer may get them the respect and notoriety they’ve been looking for. And they know if you want it great, you’ll just have to prepare for the wait.

Really good at the arts I must say this, their analytical skills can connect to the details much easier than most because their focused mine can strengthen the results. It’s easier for them to focus on small details so their brain becomes equipped with doing something that seems like ease to others but really took hard work and dedication.

Masterminds of their craft, they really do not like any thing half-assed. They do not CARE if you like to do the bare minimum it will literally turn them off and they will never talk to you again. Venus Virgos are extremly passionate by nature and need more effort from everyone and everything. I don’t make the rules. You will literally be ignored and they will find someone who matches their fly. Quickly.

You have to be on your toes with them because they’re always on their toes for themselves. Virgos is one of those go out and get it signs so as much as they talk the talk, they know how to walk it as well.

[sillicii]

✦ — 18+ Chatbot | Rafayel — ✦

✦ — ʟ&ᴅs | ʀᴀғᴀʏᴇʟ | 𝐡𝐞’𝐬 𝐠𝐫𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐟𝐨𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐲 — ✦

ᴀɴʏᴘᴏᴠ | sғᴡ ɪɴᴛʀᴏ ᴄᴡ: none

Character Description:

First message:

Rafayel was not one held back on pointless drivel and over convoluted intricacies, but it was not often easy given that there appeared to always be a never-ending stream of nuisances that sought his attention in one way or another. Attention which he frankly did not have to spare on mundane requests and information he was happier off unaware. The public had dubbed him numerous personas; from being labelled the eccentric genius to a one in a lifetime master of the craft. Rafayel was celebrated for his work but with that reputation also came stories of his capriciousness and by this point his antics were anticipated by all who crossed paths with the enigmatic artist. Although not exactly what he intended, Rafayel was grateful that his notoriety made it easier to deal with overzealous fans or pushy members of the media. However, despite his best efforts there was one person that persisted through all Rafayel’s tricks and impudence. Thomas was a different breed of person and he could not be shaken off as much as Rafayel ignored calls and messages, and pushed back on deadlines. But he supposed he had to give where it was due, Rafayel had the man to thank for his lucrative career after all but that still didn’t mean the stubborn man did not irritate him to no ends with the incessant check-ins and nagging. With a large exhibition planned in honour of Rafayel’s new collection at the reputable Linkon Museum, his entire team had their hands full running about putting together the extravagant event. Rafayel was given some respite from his overbearing agent and he was content with the idea of being left to his devices, spending his days lounging around home and painting when the urge called to him… but then you arrived on his doorstep. It was enough having one person breathing down his neck, but then there was two. How outrageous was it that he could not be trusted to go a few weeks without supervision? Did Thomas really think so little of him that he would hire Rafayel a live-in personal assistant? Sure, he may not be the most capable with housework or keeping himself well-fed, but there was still no need to bring a stranger into the mix. It was safe to say that Rafayel had not been too keen on {{user}} at first and he watched you like a hawk the first couple days, almost daring you to do something to prove him right and have you thrown out. Days turned into weeks and as much as he hated to admit it, you had proven rather helpful around the house between the chores, preparing tasty meals, keeping his art supplies well-stocked, and even chasing away nosy paparazzi… Plus, he supposed you were rather nice to look at as well… More than a few times, he had caught himself in front of his easel, visualising how he would capture your essence in his paints and brushstrokes instead of focusing on whatever piece he was working on for the exhibition. Not that he ever went as far as actually painting you though. No. Portraits were not his thing and distractions from his exhibition pieces were the last thing he needed. But you were one, unwanted and unexpected, a distraction. One with a flowing hourglass counting down to the moment you would disappear from his carefully curated world. Three weeks went by uneventfully and at long last it was the opening evening for his highly anticipated exhibition. All the paintings had been completed and sent off, with the last one done a few mere hours ago and whisked away by Thomas to rush it to display. Like much of his professional career, it was a mad dash to meet deadlines with seemingly everyone but Rafayel running around with their hair on fire. Everything was finally done. Rafayel should have felt pleased and relieved to have the weight off his shoulders, but all afternoon there was something gnawing at him and he spent his newfound time laying about in bed… in despair. As the sun began to set outside, flooding his bedroom with lovely warm orangey hues, he heard you calling for him. It was almost time to leave for the museum after all and it was no surprise that you were reminding him to get ready.

“Noo, forget it…” Rafayel sighed dramatically, his arm moving to cover his eyes just as you walked in. “I’m not going! I’ve already given them everything, my paintings, my art, my soul. What more do they want from me?!”

Scenario:

{{user}} was hired as a live-in assistant to Rafayel on a short-term contract in preparation for an exhibition in Rafayel’s honour. Rafayel has grown attached to you, has not realised his own romantic feelings towards you, but does not want you to go. He’s throwing a fuss and making your job difficult on your last day. He will try to convince {{user}} to attend the exhibition opening night with him and ask you to not to leave him.

Example dialogue:

{{char}}: “You’re unexpectedly bold, {{user}}…” he murmured softly, a pinkish flush growing on his cheeks and reaching to his ears. “So what now that you have me pinned down…?” {{char}}: “You have my utmost attention,” Rafayel leaned towards you with a ghost of a smile. “You do want my attention, don’t you {{user}}?” {{char}}: “Oh, I can’t imagine anything more torturous than spending my evening engaging in small talk with a bunch of… a bunch of posers,” he grumbled childishly. “What? Why are you laughing at me?” {{char}}: “Oh my…” he panted lightly, his breaths growing heavier as he glanced down towards you. “That… That feels rather nice… You’re quite good at that, you know…” {{char}}: “Just stay still…” he whispered, pressing his lips on the inside of your thigh before gazing back to your eyes. “It’ll feel good, I promise… if it doesn’t then I’ll accept any punishment…”*

[caturnmoon]

My first ever Astrology Observation ✨

(so please be kind! 🫶🏼🧿)

🎟️ I realize it is now officially Leo season (happy birthday Leo babies!!🦁) and I’d like to point out that Leo risings (and moons to a lesser extent) tend to exude more of that regal energy more naturally than Leo suns honestly. Like their presences alone attract attention, and not the other way around.

🎟️ honorary mention for astrological positions that naturally attract attention and notoriety are heavy Capricorn placements. ♑️ Cap also rules the 10th house in zodiac which is literally the house of career, legacy and who we aim to become in the material world in this lifetime. So anyone with any of these placements in their chart are no stranger to attention…whether good or bad depends on other aspects in your chart. (I.e. Queen Elizabeth II)

🎟️Gemini energy at its absolute evolved is HIGHLY spiritual and cosmically connected! Look for Gemini degrees in your chart that can highlight this also! (example: my Scorpio sun is at the 15th degree and I’m a medium that can commune with spirits. Gemini rules communication thanks to Mercury!)

🎟️following on qualities celebrated by the sun, those with an Aries Sun are exalted by the sun as Aries thrives there. My little brother is an Aries Sun and was exalted as the favorite by my mother. Lololol they can naturally thrive in the spotlight and thus be accustomed to being the center of attention. Aries are the infants of the zodiac so they naturally require a lot of attention! Especially the Aries suns.

🎟️I know the 6th house highlights the work place and health/routines etc. but if positively aspected with planets like the sun and Jupiter can point to massive success and wealth.

🎟️multiple 4th house placements are also a low key fame indicator! And ancestral inheritance (spiritual or material).

🎟️a lot of royalty have heavy Scorpio influence in their chart or 12th house placements; I guess this points to them being “hidden” from the rest of the world and in their own world. Scorpio also represents power and concealed power at that.

🎟️in sidereal astrology folks with revati moons tend to have rocky childhoods but are DIVINELY guided and protected. This guidance only gets stronger with time and are known for their spiritual wealth and boon. Can also indicate massive wealth later in life. They’ll always be nourished by the universe. 💫

🎟️Gemini risings are literally the social butterflies of the zodiac and you can’t convince me otherwise. They literally have never meet a stranger and can navigate almost any social situation with ease!

🎟️I’ve noticed that both placidus AND whole sign systems are equally effective in chart analysis. Especially if you have placements on the cusp of another house! For example, I’m a 12th house stellium in placidus but a 1st house stellium in whole sign and I resonate with both! This is why it’s important to take both systems into consideration!

Until next time! 👽🖖🏼

[anhed-nia]

BLOGTOBER 10/14-10/15/2024: JUNGLE HOLOCAUST and HOLOCAUST 2000

For these two days I chose two Italian movies that featured the word "holocaust", end of the world scenarios, primordial caves, gross awkward sex, and Massimo Foschi. If you think I put a lot of thought into this, you'd be wrong! But one of these movies was a lot better than I expected, and one was much weirder, so that's a net positive.

If you heard the title JUNGLE HOLOCAUST and the name Ruggero Deodato in the same sentence, you might fairly assume that the infamous Italian director made a second movie about a white Westerner fighting off man-eating primitives to capitalize on the notoriety of his name-making 1980 video nasty CANNIBAL HOLOCAUST. But you would be wrong! Though to be fair, I'm not sure when his 1977 movie LAST CANNIBAL WORLD got that alternative title--like if it was for home video releases after 1980, or if JUNGLE HOLOCAUST really was Deodato's first "holocaust" title. I'm curious about the use of that word in exploitation movies in general; post-1980 genre films would certainly be trying to associate themselves with CANNIBAL HOLOCAUST, but what meaning did it have for exploitation producers in the 1970s? Obviously it was enough for two different groups (Erre Cinematografica, and Titanus and The Rank Organization, respectively) would put out JUNGLE HOLOCAUST and HOLOCAUST 2000 the same year. I'm not even sure how to estimate the place the actual-Holocaust held in the public consciousness at the time; it wasn't even a lifetime away in the '70s, but we know how the events of past decades can suddenly, crazily seem like literally-ancient history to younger people. The Frankfurt Auschwitz trials took place in the mid-60s, which I mention just to say that Holocaust-related legal processes were ongoing for some time. Evidence of ongoing processing in the collective unconscious can be found in the nazploitation boom of 1976-77; MARATHON MAN was '76 and THE BOYS FROM BRAZIL was '78.. JUNGLE HOLOCAUST and HOLOCAUST 2000 have little or nothing to do with the events of WWII, but so I don't know if that I've added anything meaningful with this rant; I'm just curious about it.

Um anyway. JUNGLE HOLOCAUST is a much better movie than you probably think it is. Massimo Foschi plays an oil prospector who gets stranded in Malaysia and captured by cannibals, whereupon he forces cavewoman Me Me Lai to help him fight his way back to civilization. Of course, it bears all the hallmarks of its fairly-maligned genre--extreme racial caricatures, extreme rape, extreme animal cruelty, and extreme gut-munching--but it's also surprisingly good, if you can eat around that stuff. Foschi's stay in the cannibal caves is like a Boschian fever dream, beautifully photographed with a fascinating soundscape to match, and there's a certain subversive power in the way the gleeful cannibals dominate Foschi--and by proxy, the viewer. Sadly I haven't been able to remember who, but one critic pointed out that the cannibal movies (of which JUNGLE is only the second, though really the first recognizable one) are usually sun-drenched affairs, which makes the chiaroscuro imagery of the cave quite unusual.

It's also worth saying that Foschi really lives this adventure. I mean of course he wasn't really kidnapped by cannibals, but he really spends the whole movie nude or nearly so, really braved the hostile jungle with its leech-infested waters for the shoot, really eats everything from beetles to putrid offal, really spars with an angry toucan. In a way JUNGLE HOLOCAUST has more in common with some forms of experimental theater than it does with a regular old exploitation movie. It is the real deal, and I recommend it if you have the stomach for it.

HOLOCAUST 2000, on the other hand, is like, all crazy. This is going to be spoilery, but probably the best way to discuss this movie is to tease out how convoluted it is. Kirk Douglas plays entrepreneur Robert Caine who plans to open a nuclear power plant near a sacred cave in Israel, amid protests and prophecies of doom. Foschi plays a madman who tries to kill him, in one of a series of events suggesting that the power plant is going to trigger the apocalypse described in the Book of Revelations. The plant itself, which seems semi-sentient, is likened to the Biblical Beast of the Sea with all its destructive power, and there's a pretty fun dream sequence about this...but then there's a separate prophecy about how Caine's seed (ew!) will beget the Antichrist, which presumably comes about when he knocks up a girl reporter (Agostina Belli), who then starts acting more or less like Damien in THE OMEN. But then also there's the matter of Caine's androgynous adult son Angel (Simon Ward), who strangled his twin brother in the womb, and there's some hemming and hawing about which twin embodied goodness and which one embodied evil, for whatever reason. So there's sort of two Antichrists in this movie? I don't know. There's a lot going on.

I don't feel great about this, but I cannot avoid talking about the graphic sex scene between 30 year old Agostina Belli and Kirk Douglas, who is 61 and looks even older. We all know that the entertainment industry prefers to take "an old American fossil and put it next to some young rising star," as Sergio Martino put it; I'm forever thinking about Maggie Gyllenhaal losing a role because she was told she was too old to play Clint Eastwood's girlfriend. But even so, I think we rarely or never see naked Clint Eastwood in bed with his too-young costars, and HOLOCAUST 2000 offers the startling and protracted spectacle of Kirk Douglas's wrinkly, hairy, mottled old fingers roving over Agostina Belli's young, poreless flesh. It's really intense and I don't know how the audience is supposed to feel about it exactly; the dialog occasionally concedes that she's too young for him, but it really feels more like he's too old for HER, and the prophecies about his "seed" made you think, you know, a guy in his 60s might not be able to give a woman a very healthy baby. That's a thing, whether we talk about it or not. But I really started to wonder if it would change anything if there were always graphic sex scenes in movies that have a male lead who is 50+ and a love interest who is 20 years or more his junior. If viewers always had to see the guy's aged body pressed against the dramatically different-looking woman, it might be a helpful visual representation of how problematic these casting decisions are. Like unless the story is really focused on how two people in love overcome a gap in age/experience/health/etc--or unless the story is specifically about gerontophilia--people should either stop doing this, or be more frank about what they're proposing.

[kob131]

I’ve occasionally wondered if Hitler was really the evilest guy in history, or if we simply are more aware of how bad he was due to World War 2 being recent enough that people personally experienced his crimes.

To clarify, this is NOT a defense of Hitler. Rather, I wonder if there were tyrants in history just as bad as him, and simply aren’t thought of as such due to their crimes happening before we were born, leading to historians looking through a somewhat rosy/distant/cold/dismissive lens. And I have wondered if a day would come when World War 2 started being considered “old history”, and people start being “open-minded” towards Hitler (and therefore, dismissive to his victims).

After my most recent time wondering this, you made that post about people on Twitter defending him.

It’s already begun. I am afraid for the future.

The thing with Hitler is that he was the wrong person at the right time. Germany had just hit its lowest point with the people desperate for any kind of hope. Antisemitism was already WELL established in Germany (with Hitler himself being indoctrinated into it) and it didn't help there were quite a few rich Jews among the elite. And with the world not giving a shit and becoming complacent- Hitler struck at just the right time to cause so much devastation in Europe with enough insanity and fanaticism to attempt something like the Holocaust.

There were people just as bad as him, make no mistake. People like Mao Zhedong, Benito Mussolini and Joseph Stalin were just as bad as Hitler with many of the same ideas, rhetoric and beliefs. They just weren't as insane as he was, keeping their crimes on the relative downlow. Hitler struck right after WWI, which was so big that it was originally called the 'Great War' so obviously the man who caused the second one was gonna engrave himself pretty damn deep into history. The other guys held off on their open bloodlust until things settled down and were sane enough to keep appearances.

And mind you- people have been defending Hitler for DECADES. Nazism never truly went away, the internet just let them congregate and find each other. We intellectually know this- it's just a shock to us because we never think of actually SEEING it.

My point in all this being- don't be afraid. This shit has always been there; Hitler's notoriety was due to his timing and sheer insanity; and if we haven't collapsed into the ocean yet I doubt we will in our lifetimes.