#And I’m afraid my parents just won’t get it so I usually don’t tell them much.
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sonic-wildfire · 8 months ago
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irulaan · 1 year ago
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OPEN WOUND | CARMEN BERZATTO
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— He understand the sacrifices he has to do in order to see you smile, to not disappoint you — as he has done so many times even when you don’t say. He understands those sacrifices sometimes came labeled as family gatherings.
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✧ PAIRING. carmy berzatto x fem!reader
✧ WORD COUNT. 3.6k
✧ WARNINGS. anxiety and u know all of carmy’s troubles. a loving family. mommy issues/parents issues/family issues, all the issues? i just watched like 3 episodes? so ooc carmy maybe? i don’t know… kinda corny too oops. no use of y/n. english isn’t my first language, expect mistakes.
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Carmy was afraid of abruptly colliding with an imaginary wall, so he stays away. He knows pain, so if he can avoid it — hell, he would.
“I don’t really know about this,” He appears in your field of view, wearing his usual clothes and a familiar concerned expression — this shouldn’t be nearly as stressful as his days inside The Beef.
You instinctively approach him, mirroring his expression. “What’s wrong? Something happened?”
He’s taken aback by your question, but he quickly understands what you mean. “Oh, no, everything it’s fine, I promise… It’s not about nor has something to do with the beef.”
And he’s naturally lying; all his current worries have their foundations in the beef or what was left of it. He’s damaged far beyond that, but you’ve learned how to read him, when to inquire, and when to remain silent.
It clicks for you when you see he’s struggling to find the words; he’s trying to devise an excuse without hurting you. You feel foolish for a moment; of course, family reunions would affect him like this.
You reach for his hand, and then his arm when he avoids your gaze, “I can tell them we’re not going if you don’t feel sure about it,” You offer, and you can almost hear how the conversation unfolds inside his head, how his engines try to maintain a semblance of calm. “I was nervous too when I got to meet your chefs…”
“It’s different,” He deadpans, and you smile, resting your hand on his shoulder, trying not to appear too concerned by playing with a single curl of his rather messy hair.
He looks at you when you let slip out a nervous laugh. “How so? You call your meetings’ family’; that says a lot.”
There’s a beat of silence, and he withdraws from your touch. “But it is not quite real… and it’s still non-functional.”
“What are you afraid of, Carmy?” You stand there, feeling your stomach drops by seeing him like this over something that feels so different for you. “My family’s going to love you, I’m sure.”
He shook his head, his face already getting that characteristic light red tint.
“Making a bad impression? They’ll realize you’re wasting your time” His beautiful eyes refused to stare at you in such moments. He’s afraid someday, somehow, you’ll unleash your anger on him because he’s just a depressed, over-thinker, anxious guy. “I know how family meetings work… It will be a mess—I won’t be able to go through it…”
“What—what do you mean? Wasting my time?” Your incredibly soft voice so understanding, as if you’re deeply connected to his mind. It’s the only explanation he can think of.
He’s convinced he’s a waste of time, even now, yet you’re not getting upset; you’re not attempting to hurl accusations at him. Granted, you’ve never done that, and Carmen doesn’t truly believe you’re capable of it… but that’s how his wounded mind works.
Carmen doesn’t provide an answer, so you try to press on to reassure him. “Carmy, you’re not wasting my time—“
He looks at you amid your sentence and suddenly comprehends there are some sacrifices he’s willing to make for you. “Fuck—okay, let’s go.”
“Carmy, I’m not—“You’re visibly confused; he doesn’t seem to mind as he takes your hand.
“Please, I’m going to lose this impulse… just— I’m trying my best,”
A vast, relieved smile covers your face, and Carmen feels he’s gazing directly at the sun — and he loves it.
You cradle his face in your hands, gently making him meet your gaze.
“If you want to leave at any time, please tell me?” There’s a shy nod, and you realize it’s a futile question to ask. But you accept it.
“I love you, Carmy,” You promise, planting a gentle peck on his cheek before heading outside.
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Your older sister obviously is the one who had to open the door, her and her extrovert energy, her weird-looking eyes, and her funny hairstyles. “There she is! My baby sister,” She usually crushes your bones under her sheer strength, and after it comes a shower of kisses. “Oh, god, I have missed you so much.”
And it’s good to see her this energetic and lovingly — you don’t want to cross her path when she’s pissed… and that’s her, the majority of the time.
She doesn’t understand personal space, so she doesn’t respect it. Your older sister doesn’t hesitate to give Carmy the same kind of hug. “And there you are! I’m Margot!” She exclaims, introducing herself and giving him a loud kiss on the cheek. Carmen only manages to whisper his name… “Mom, did you know that our baby sister’s boyfriend is the best chef in the world?” She shouts, ensuring everyone in the house hears her.
You gulp, and almost get whiplash from how fast your eyes look for his. He doesn’t seem comfortable at all; he’s stiff and fidgety, moving his fingers as if searching for something to hold. You offer your hand, and he wastes no time intertwining his fingers with yours.
As you step into the house, your sister closes the door and disappears into the kitchen, where you can hear your mom lightly scolding her. “Mags! You’re making him uncomfortable,” Then you’re greeted by her warm features and a soft smile that’s so similar to yours. She doesn’t even glance at you—her attention is fixed on your anxious boyfriend. “I’m sorry, child, she’s a bit like that,” she apologizes.
Carmy is enveloped in an endearing hug, the kind your mother or grandmother can only master. He suddenly wants to weep. How’s it that he didn’t deserve that warmth from his own mother?
It doesn’t last long, though. She soon wraps her arms around you, embracing you as tightly as your sister, and whispers how much she loves you. It’s characteristic of her—she’s unafraid to show her emotions.
And that’s all Carmen ever longed for.
“Where’s dad?”
She chuckles, shaking her head. “That old man forgot something… you know how he is,” she replies.”
And then, for Carmen’s well-being, another whirlwind approaches. He needs a breath of fresh air before whoever is descending the stairs arrives, ready to offer more hugs and love.
It’s your brother-in-law. Carmy’s lucky this man isn’t affectionate at all. “You’re earlier, bug,” he remarks, giving you a dry pat on the head, tousling your hair slightly. “Love, how did your baby sister do this?”
“Maybe it’s her boyfriend!” You heard Mag’s loud chuckle from the kitchen.
“Thank you, Carmen, for turning her into a punctual person, for god’s sake!” They shake hands. You observe your brother-in-law nearly stifling his inclination to crack a joke or be downright abrasive. He pledged to Margot that he’d be friendly… “It must be because you’re a chef; you can’t afford to be late, right?”
Carmy suddenly becomes hyperaware of his surroundings—the quiet conversation on TV, your mother and sister laughing in the kitchen, the distant voices of kids upstairs, his sweaty palms… and the broad smile on the man before him… expecting him to say something? God, he feels like a complete freak… “Yeah, th—that’s right”.
Did you fucking stutter?
You quickly notice his unease and almost drag him away from the man. “Mom, do you need help?”
“Baby? Your nieces are upstairs! Get them, please?”
After a sigh, you look at Carmen, who is already staring at you. He can clearly see how excited you are — how can you not be? When everyone loves you so much, and they show you? Even him right now, when he’s overwhelmed, he only can think about how much he loves you. “You want to stay here?”
He can’t; he’s going to have a panic attack. He’s overwhelmed by racing thoughts, the cacophony of sounds disrupting his thinking, and his heart rate threatening to skyrocket. He’s one sentence, one laugh, one scream away from losing connection with you. If he can’t step outside to breathe fresh air, he’ll cause a scene in your parent’s house. “I need to go out; it’s too much—“
“—I’m sorry, let’s go outside,” You almost drag him outside under the concerned stare of your sister.
When the cold air floods his senses, he can finally breathe properly. His fingers work on autopilot, seeking and reaching for a cigarette. He sits down on the old bench, you remained on your feet by his side.
It’s a whole scene you’re familiar with. Only lacking Tina and Richie’s loud screaming.
In moments like this, you know better than to exacerbate his unease with words and questions… he has learned to calm himself by his own means, and you respect that.
Once the cigarette is thrown away, you eventually become a part of his surroundings again. Carmy snakes his arms around your waist, pushing his head against your belly.
Your sweet smell comforts him. He inhales deeply when you card your fingers through his hair.
“You want to go home?” You ask, planting a kiss just above his hairline.
He begrudgingly distance himself from you. “Not really, it’s just—everybody loves each other?”
You pause momentarily, your gaze shifting from the bustling room to Carmen beside you. “I’m sorry about my sister and her husband, they have been like that since ever, and I understand if you feel bad; they mean no harm, tho” You completely miss the point.
Carmen looks at you — behind his eyes, a mixture of fear and frustration. “It’s not that, I couldn’t care less about it! It’s like I have—I have this fear—I’m not good at social interactions, I try my best—but did you see, heard? I fucking stutter! I—“
You try to comfort him through physical touch — laying your hand on his arm to ground him in the present. “You’re nervous; it’s expected, Carmy…”
He pressed his lips into a line. But you continue, “I’m or was as socially awkward as you are. Believe me when I say they’re used to odd phrases, stuttering, awkward silences, and silly laughs to avoid a question.”
“But they love you… it’s different,” He emphasizes. Carmen’s gaze remains somewhere else, his fingers fidgeting slightly.
“They love you too, and before you say anything, it’s simply because you make me happy, god! Carmy! They always tease me when I speak about you because I’m so in love with you because there’s always a smile on my face. And do you know how long they’ve waited for a huge smile from me? Years. And you know why, so yes, of course, they love you,”
He lets out a sigh, his shoulders slumping as he rubs the back of his neck. “I don’t really know what to say — I’m sorry, just my head messed up with me…”
A tender smile lights your face. “I know, Carmy, and I’m glad you can recognize when your mind is just playing games… you’ve come far,” you reassure him with a gentle smile. “And I won’t be pissed or angry about your insecurities or worries, but I understand if you’re waiting for me to almost kill you for it… It sucks, sure, but I understand. I’ve felt like that”.
Carmen’s gaze finally meets yours; he’s being so vulnerable right now that you only want to cuddle him, hoping all his insecurities vanish under the morning sun.
“Should we go inside? I don’t really want to worry your mother or sister,”
“If you want. If you need more time, we can stay here a bit longer,”
His voice is quieter when he finally speaks, a hint of relief lacing his words. “I’m better.” The tension in his body seems to ease slightly as he takes a deep breath, his expression slowly relaxing — he’s trying his best.
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The soft sound of cutlery clinking against the dishes, the low individual conversations, the baby’s blabbing, and the dim lights on the dinning room shapes a homely ambience.
“You need to see her in action! She’s always been the best cook of the family, you know, Carmy?” Your sister interjects as her eyes light up with nostalgia.
That catches Carmy’s attention. He’s staring at you with genuine curiosity. So, stereotypically, your mom gets up in search of something. “Oh, you have to see her photos!” She chuckles, scavenging for the photo album. “She was so stubborn, wanting to make her own food for her or anyone’s birthdays, always looking for new recipes, she has done the craziest stuff!”
While your mother shows Carmy all your embarrassing childhood pictures, your brother-in-law can’t contain himself, he has to make a joke, and his playful grin gives him away. “I’m glad you’re a chef; she’s not at good as her parents want her to be.”
And your mother frowns, feigning annoyance, as Margot gives him a subtle punch.
“Because you suck at it, child,” Your father quips at him. “She’s good, right? Carmy”
Carmy considers for a moment, his gaze shifting from one sibling to another — he can mess up things if he doesn’t pick the right words. “Objectively, she’s quite decent. Some of her pastries are better than mine.”
You had plastered a lovesick grin on your flushed face. “I was born gifted, you see,”
He relishes in your soft giggles.
Your sister chuckles at the little scene your both doing, sharing a knowing look with your mother. “She was in diapers, building mud cakes outside, in the front yard…” Her stare lingers on you for a bit. “Do you remember, mom?”
Your mother nods, a fond smile on her lips. “Of course I do! Both of you treated your sister like she was a toy,” She teases her children. “Look at this, Carmen, she had been everything by the age of four.”
She finds her favorite picture of you, a huge smile paired with a set of eyes mimicking two big stars. “You were so cute.”
Your cheeks flush at his candid compliment, grateful for the levity that’s now enveloped the conversation. The shared stories and gentle teasing ease the tension, allowing Carmy to glimpse the playful dynamics of your family. He’s relaxing, finally starting to feel comfortable being around so many people that expected a lot from him.
Staring at each other, you both smile. And you don’t miss the dreamy sigh from your sister. You decided to give him a faint peck on his lips — earning a few ‘yuck’s and ‘wow’s from the kids.
“Okay, lovebirds!” Your brother said, rolling his eyes in feigned annoyance — but Carmen can’t read him at all.
Not wanting him to sour the moment, your sister fights him back, “Why’s your girlfriend not here, uh?” You feel Carmy tense beside you as his hand flies to your thigh. To ground himself, to brace his rushing thoughts.
He’s expecting confrontation.
Your brother only frowns, “Funny,”
And Carmen’s so stiff, he could break if you push him. By means to help him, you whisper into his ear. “She didn’t come because Mag told her she was a milquetoast” He looked at you sideways with a confused expression. “Was recently, tho, she’ll be fine.”
Your brother shrugged and seemed to be worked up about something your sister said, but you couldn’t catch it. “Stop treating my girlfriends like they’re your friends! That’s what happens.”
Margot would rather die than not have the last word; she was provoked. “Stop bringing girls that can’t take a joke!” You could hear a few choked sounds as they tried to repress a laugh. “They’re just bland as you…”
But that was enough for your dear mother, “Margot! Stop mocking your brother, you’re acting like teenagers again!”
“I think it is the midlife crisis…” Said your brother-in-law.
Your sister laughs theatrically, bending his neck to throw her head back. Just to come back and stare directly at your brother with a big smile. “Something we have in common!”
“Carmen, dear, you want more?” Your mother whispered to him, trying to keep the conversation for the both of them only.
She understands he is fairly timid and awkward.
He smiles at her, into her wrinkled eyes that carry a joyful gaze, at her delicate and low voice tone. “Oh, no, I’m fine, thank you—thank you… I—uh, it was fine” He feels like he’s making that weird face, and your mother’s smile grows. And before continuing, he runs a hand over his face and his already messy curls, “Sorry—it was great, I don’t have this type of homemade meal often.”
She nods, glad he doesn’t lie or coat her in praises. It’s nothing out of the world but has other qualities; it tastes like childhood, like home, like your best day under the sun. It tastes mundane and, at the same time, magical. And he can’t wait to be a recurring guest…
“I’m delighted you liked it. She should prepare meals like this more often for you… because I’m sure, she’s always eating like a princess.”
Carmy nods, feeling his cheeks flush under your mother’s discerning gaze, particularly as they discuss you. “She is. I care about her”.
Your mother places a reassuring hand on his, her encouraging smile not going unnoticed, “It shows, Carmy,” He feels on the verge of tears again. Hearing that he’s doing well is a rarity; he only ever hears it from you. While it’s enough, he wishes his family did the same. “You’re a great guy.”
A knot tightens in his throat, and all he can manage to mumble without breaking is a quiet: “Thanks—“, He won’t fight your mother’s words.
“You should come over for the holidays… we spend a week on the coast. My parents had a great house there, and it’s lovely,” breaks in your father, “Everyone would love to see both of you there…”
Everyone is nodding, excitement filling the air. You probably had the best memories in that beach house. But Carmy’s eyes are glued on the table, his fingers absently tracing patterns on the back of your hand.
As the invitations hang in the air, an uneasy tension settles between you both — shouldn’t you respond to that should you?
The weight of the offer, the promise of belonging, and the haunting fear of judgment gnaw at his thoughts. And he’s spiraling again.
Your mother, in hopes of comforting him, takes his hand. “Oh, yeah, child, we’re a bit messy but nothing too bad… you’ll like it,” She’s nonchalant about it; she doesn’t want to pressure him. But the oldest of her daughters had to interrupt her. “—Baby sister loves it! You’re going to love it there too.”
Carmy smiled and gave them a quick nod. Your father makes an “ok” with his hand, and your lovely boyfriend stops being under the spotlight.
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In the car back home, under the low-volume radio, he sighs, his voice tinged with resignation. “I wish I could just… step into your world without feeling like I’m going to mess it all up”. His words carry the weight of his insecurities, the years of feeling out of place and never fitting in.
You reach for his hand, squeezing it gently, your silent support a comforting gesture amidst his internal turmoil. “Carmy, they want you there because of who you are, not who you think you should be.”
His eyes leave the way for a second to meet yours. You catch a mixture of yearning and gloom reflected in them. “I know, but… what if I can’t be what they want me to be?”
The ache in your chest matches the one in his voice. You can hear how he’s fighting within himself, the desire to be loved and accepted warring against his self-doubt. He was raised to feel like that. “Carmy, you don’t have to pretend. You don’t have to be perfect. They’ll accept you for who you are, flaws and all. I mean — they invited you over. They don’t do that often. My mother loved you!” It sounds a bit more gleeful than you expected. All because you’re excited he’s welcomed into the family.
He lets out a bitter chuckle, his shoulders slumping. “You say that, but it’s not that simple for me.”
The weight of his words hangs in the air, erasing your smile. And he regrets them the instant you recoil in your seat, even though it’s an unconscious action.
A second passes, and for him, it’s like minutes are splitting you, carrying you away from him. He doesn’t know what to say; he’s resigned, waiting for the consequences.
Again, it was a nasty point of view from his mind. You reposition yourself on the seat before speaking. “Carmy, we’ve been through a lot together. We’ve seen each other changing and for good. And I’ve always been there for you, if you still need space, time… it’s fine. We’ll find a way out, yes?”
He parks the car, and then his eyes search for yours. He longs to be better, to know better. For him, the restaurant, his family—for Sugar, for you.
“I don’t think I deserve you.”
A sad smile touches your lips. “Just because you’re going through a hard time doesn’t mean you’re less worthy. I loved you in New York, and I love you like this. Your past and present emotions and thoughts don’t get a say in what you deserve or not, especially when we’re talking about nice things.”
“But I’m—“
“—Carmy! You won’t make me change my opinion” Your tone is softer than severe — you’ll never be severe.
And he’ll never be unloved.
“Did you realize you didn’t bring the pepto?”
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a/n: Shitty ending, I KNOW I’m sorry… If I keep writing, I am going to end nowhere, so it has to end like this JDKKW. Hope you enjoyed <3. Reblogs/comments/likes are very appreciated <3
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jimothy-hopkins · 3 months ago
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This is another one of my many precious Bully ocs, Alice. She’s the sweetest fr. (Also easiest to draw)
Info about Alice!
General Description:
Alice is average height with an athletic, but delicate build. She has short, bleached blonde hair and greens eyes. She is in the paler side, and tends to get burned when she makes any attempt to tan. Alice walks with a straight posture, but tends to be fidgety when still.
Unlike many of her fellow preps, Alice is incredibly kind. She is known to be generous, and gives to those in need whenever she can. She is aware of her privilege and tries to use it to improve the lives of others rather than just take it for herself. As nice as Alice is, she is naive and often gets taken advantage of. She tends to struggle with anxiety as a result from the pressure of those around her.
Interests and whatnot:
Alice is very interested in charity and philanthropy, much like her parents. She attends various events and even starts her own fundraisers for certain causes. Wether that be school bake sales to help the art and theatre department, or going to large charity events to put money towards hospitals and whatnot.
Aside from charity, Alice is also an environmentalist and an animal rights activist. She does her best to improve natural habitats of animals and donates to rescues and shelters so that they have more capacity and care for animals.
One of Alice’s biggest interests is figure skating. Alice started skating at a young age, and has developed a natural talent for it. Skating brings her into a relaxed, but determined state of mind. It is her passion. It is what she is best at. She is deemed a prodigy.
Reputation:
Due to her interest in figure skating and regular fitness routine, Alice is admired by the jocks. She doesn’t cause issues for them, since she is usually very kind.
The greasers hate Alice by association. Alice doesn’t blame them at all- if the shoe was on the other foot she would hate the preps as well. She understands their point of view and does her best to avoid them.
The preps don’t respect her as much as she would like. She really only hangs around the clique because that was where she was initially accepted. They often think she’s childish and silly for starting charities and donating money. She is also in competition with her fellow preps across academics and sports. Their expectations weigh heavy on Alice.
Alice is in very good standing with the bullies. She is dating one of their clique members. (This member is a separate oc of mine, her name is Angelina. I’ll make her ref soon I promise guys.) The pair are quite open about their relationship. Alice and Angelina spend a lot of time with one another.
Alice is straight up afraid of the nerds. She’s heard all about Earnest and wants NOTHING to do with that crowd. If she absolutely had to be by their hangout spots, Alice brings her girlfriend with her to make sure they won’t bother her.
Quotes:
“If money is the root of all evil, I want to try and use mine for good things.”
“Sorry, I have a date with Angelina, cya later!”
“I can’t stand the way they talk about poor people! Just because they don’t have a trust fund doesn’t mean they should be treated that way.”
“One day I’ll skate at the Olympics.”
“Do you need anything? I’m happy to help!”
“Oh, I don’t have a five. Is a hundred okay for you? Here, take it.”
“Derby PAID someone for that ACT score. He’s not that smart.”
“I just feel like I’m a complete failure! They all hate me I don’t know what to do!”
“Snowball fight!”
“Promise you’ll be a real friend, please?”
“I can’t tell if Derby is just born that way or if he’s had plastic surgery. He doesn’t even look real.”
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holylulusworld · 6 months ago
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Heavenly creature - Unbreakable Bonds (6)
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Summary: A stranger saves you from an unfriendly encounter. Is he a knight in shiny armor?
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader
Characters: Tony Stark, Steve Rogers, Princess Shuri
Warnings: heavy angst, language, hurt & comfort, clingy/possessive reader, fluff, dad!Steve
A/N: I usually do not describe my reader’s appearance/race. In this case I had to make an exception as it’s important for the storyline.
Divider by @firefly-graphics​
<< Part 5
Heavenly Creature masterlist
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“Soldier, are we done for today?” You hopefully look at Bucky when he walks inside the examination room. Your face falls seeing Steve by his side. “Please?”
“We are almost done for today,” Steve softly says. “Our friend will run a few more tests, okay.”
You reluctantly nod. 
“They mean no harm,” Bucky adds. You visibly relax at his words. “How about we have lunch together? All of us.” He holds out his hand and forces a smile on his face.
“Yes,” you grab his hand and smile widely. “Can we have dessert too? I miss ice cream. I haven’t had some in ages.”
“Why?” Steve asks. “Ice cream is great.”
“They said it’s bad and…” You suck in a breath. The words just slipped out of your mouth before you could stop them. “Sugar is bad…feelings too…”
“Doll,” Bucky wraps his arms around you when you start to cry. “Hey, you can eat as much ice cream as you want to.”
“What if I can’t heal you because I ate sugar? What if you die?” You fist Bucky’s shirt. “I can’t risk losing you. It will be all my fault if you can’t be healed.”
Steve chokes out a sob. He witnessed Hydra’s cruelty more than once. But your broken voice telling them all the things Hydra planted in your young mind when you were a child, is unbearable to him.
“They won’t know, Y/N,” Steve tries once again to get your attention. “Bucky is healthy and strong. If he gets hurt, we can help him at the medic bay. We have doctors, and I can donate blood for him too. I’m a super-soldier, remember?”
“You can?” You lift your head and sniffle. “Is your blood as good as mine? Maybe it’s not as good…”
“Y/N, I’m your father. We share the same blood,” Steve holds back another sob when you reluctantly let go of Bucky to step toward him. ��I’m a universal donor too.”
“Oh!” Your smile widens and you grasp Steve’s hand. “You can save my soldier too! Wonderful!”
Steve holds back a sigh. Your whole world seems to revolve around his friend. Since they broke the barrier you built in your mind to protect yourself from remembering your past, you lost interest in anything but Bucky. 
“We should eat now,” Steve murmurs, afraid to scare you off if he speaks any louder. “What do you like?”
“Pasta and ice cream,” you dreamily say. “Maybe we can have chocolate too, and pudding. I love pudding.”
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“Hmm…tastes great,” you shovel the pasta in your mouth, ignoring people staring at you and the super-soldiers at your table. “What?” You cock a brow. “It’s good.”
“You should slow down,” Steve whispers, afraid to draw too much attention toward your table. “There is more than enough.”
“It’s delicious and I don’t want you to steal my food,” you pout at Steve before you look at Bucky. “Why don’t you eat, soldier? You need food to stay strong and healthy.”
“I’m good,” Bucky barely touched the food in front of him. On your way to the restaurant, you talked non-stop about your past, and all the things your so-called parents forbid you. Like playing with your dolls or spending time with other kids.
You nod but worry Bucky might be sick. “Are you sick? Do you need me to help you?” You slip off the chair to press the back of your hand to Bucky’s forehead. “No temperature. That’s good. You’re not having a fever then.”
“Y/N,” Steve gets up from his chair to stop you from examining Bucky. “Please eat your food. Bucky is not sick. You need the food more than him.”
“Okay.”
Steve pulls the chair for you, nodding at his friend. “You need to eat something too, Buck. We don’t want Y/N to worry about you. Give her what she needs…”
“I’ll eat, doll,” Bucky lifts the spoon to his mouth. “See. No reason to worry about me all the time.”
You shyly glance at your plate. There is chaos in your mind. A part of you wants to be close to Bucky, and make sure he’s safe. And the little part that’s left of the shy librarian is screaming bloody murder and begs you to run for the hills if you get the chance to do so.
So far, you don’t know which part of your personality will win the war going on inside of you. You’d love it to be the part wanting to be close to Bucky. Because without him, who are you?
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Steve shows you around the apartment they prepared at the Avengers’ tower for you. You follow him, barely sparing the furniture and decoration a glance.
“We got most of your things, some books too. If you need anything else, please let me know,” he hopefully looks at you, waiting for your response.
“That’s very kind of you, and Mr. Stark but—” you chew on your lower lip, afraid to anger the super-soldier. “Can I not stay with my soldier?”
“Y/N,” he sighs. “I know something tells you that you must stay close to Bucky, but it’s best if you stay here for a while. You need to time on your own, and to sort your thoughts.”
“I want—” you shake your head. “I need to stay close. Please don’t leave me here all alone with my thoughts. Please.” You grab Steve’s hand, tugging hard. “Please Dad…don’t leave me alone with them…”
“With whom?” he softly asks. “Y/N?”
“The ghosts of my past,” you whimper. “I can hear them in my head now. Mom. Dad. My aunt. The doctors. The men with the guns,” you sniffle. “They are screaming at me. If I’m close to the soldier, they are gone.”
“Oh, Y/N,” Steve wraps you in a hug. “I don’t know if it’s a good idea. Bucky hates himself for kidnapping and hurting you. He blames himself for forcing you to remember your past.”
“I hated my life before the soldier found me again. Nightmares and flashbacks aren’t new to me. I just didn’t know why the voices followed me around. At least now I know that I’m not crazy.
“If you want me to, I’ll ask Bucky if it’s okay that you stay with him for tonight.”
“Please.”
Steve wishes you’d seek his closeness. You’re a grown woman, still, Steve feels like he’s holding a newborn child in his arms. Not days ago, he believed he’d never get the chance to become a father, and now he’s holding his child in his arms.  
“We will ask him together. Okay. Don’t worry. Bucky is a good man and will not send you away. Get a few things and I’ll be waiting outside for you.”
Steve steps away to leave the room. He’s still torn between protecting you from his best friend and being happy that you trust Bucky enough to feel safe close to him.
“You’d have been a much better dad,” you murmur as Steve grabs the door handle. “Now I know why they never told me about you.”
“I wish I knew about you, Y/N. I’d have come to your aid and saved you and Bucky.”
“I know.”
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“No programming and no manipulation?” Tony huffs. “That’s impossible. It’s like she’s programmed to follow Barnes like a puppy.”
Shuri shakes her head. “You don’t understand. In a way, she got manipulated by Hydra. But – the part of Y/N seeking White Wolf’s closeness is the part that remembers his kindness in times of need. I talked to her for hours and ran all the tests. It’s her, nothing more and nothing less.”
“I don’t—” Tony shakes his head. “How’s that possible?”
“Her vulnerable soul and broken mind tried to find a way to bear all the pain and treatment. Somehow, a bond between these tortured souls formed so many years ago. And I think it’s unbreakable…”
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“Sold-“ you stop yourself from pouncing on Bucky. You nervously shuffle from one foot to the other, waiting for Bucky to tell you to get closer. “Bucky.”
“Hi,” Bucky offers a weak smile. “How are you?”
“I…” Dropping your gaze you shrug. “I don’t know, to be honest. I remember everything now. Hydra. You. My parents, who weren’t my parents. My time as a librarian. The soldier protecting me.”
“I remember you now too,” he slowly steps closer and holds out his hand. “Back then I made a promise to you. Do you remember?”
“Yes,” you nod and smile. “You said that no one will ever hurt me again. That you’ll save me and get me away from the bad people.”
“I will keep that promise from now on. I failed you in the past,” he takes your hand to gently hold it, “I won’t fail this time...”
The End...?
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Tags in reblog.
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totally-not-a-changeling · 2 months ago
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hey, I don’t usually post too much about personal stuff, but I need to get my thoughts out and I don’t know anyone in real life who would actually be able to help with this (for reasons I’ll get into)
I grew up in the Mormon church, and I was happy and glad I was in “the true church.” But then I found out I was bisexual and started to realize that the church isn’t as perfect as I thought it was.
I felt physical ill when my parents found out about me and tried to tell me to “repent” and stuff like that. I’m not going into much details, but it was awful.
any hopes of me feeling safe and happy in the church went down the drain. I played nice for a while and now that I’m 18, my parents are expecting me to apply to BYU and go to the temple after I graduate high school. my parents are helping me to temple prep, but the idea of going through the temple right after I graduate makes me feel sick. But if I say I don’t feel ready then they’ll question why and it’ll be the “coming out” situation all over again and I can’t do that again.
I want to talk to someone about this but lucky me, I live in “Mormon-topia” Utah and I’m afraid that if I talk to someone, they’ll either tell my parents or the church, or guilt me into staying. I do have queer friends but I don’t want to burden them, especially since many in my friend group are still believers in the church.
I don’t know what to do. I feel trapped and that I don’t have a choice. I’m scared that I won’t be able to get out for a long time, and once I do get out it’ll destroy my family relationships. I have no idea if I’m overreacting or not. I’ve always been dramatic, so I’ll leave that up to you.
sorry, I just needed to vent and get my thoughts out. I’ll be goofy soon but general conference weekend was rough for me.
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jiliansky-blog · 1 year ago
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In the dark. Chapter 4. Through the fairy woods
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Pairing: Morpheus x FemaleReader
Rating: PG
Words: 2100
You were sitting in his bed. What have you done? Where did he go? You can’t sit there forever. You need to find him and undo the mistake. So you got up and left the room to find Lucienne. She was in the library as usual.
“Lucienne!” you said desperately. “I did the mistake”.
“Oh god”, she took out her glasses and sighed. “Did you try to see him?”
“Yes”, you said. “The curiosity took the best of me! I wanted to look just for a second, and then he disappeared. What happened?”
“Why can't you wait just till the end of this week?” she asked, tired. “He would explain to you everything. And now he is gone”.
“I’m so sorry!” you sighed. “But please, can you tell me where he is, so I can find him?”
“I guess I don’t have another choice”, the librarian replied. “But I doubt that you can save him now. He is in the realm of fairies”.
“Why?” you asked.
“He argued with Titania, the fairy queen”, she said. “She wanted him and said that no one is going to get attached to him if they don’t see him”.
“Oh, that is why he wanted to stay in the dark”, you said. “But it was almost like he didn’t want me to fall in love with him. He even told me a story about a princess who dumped a god. And said that he couldn’t be with mortals.
“I suppose the thought of your presence in the darkness would be enough”, she sighed. “Now we will never know. But you did get attached to him?”
“I did”, you said. "So, what is Titania going to do to him?”
“He must serve her for a hundred years or marry her”, she said.
“Oh no”, you replied. “I need to help him, even if he hates me after my mistake. I can’t leave him here for a hundred years”.
“What can you do against the Fairy queen?” Lucienne asked.
“I need to fix it”, you said. “Morpheus always says that they can’t be trusted. And I read about them a lot. You can also help me. You can give me serious books about fairies. The more I know, the more prepared I’m going to be”.
“If you say so”, she sighed. “He won’t be pleased”.
“I know, but I need to get him back”, you replied.
“If you insisted”, replied Lucienne, who brought you books.
You started to read, but eventually you woke up. Anyway, keep reading for the next few nights. You could still access the Dreaming. Perhaps, Morpheus wants you to stay here. And then you decided that you couldn’t wait any longer.
“I need to go”, you said. “I need to find him”.
“Very well”, Lucienne sighed. “It would be better for you if you went there from the Dreaming”.
“But it means I continue to sleep in the Waking world”, you admitted. “And I don’t know when I’m going to wake up”.
“I can give coordinates where the places you need are, but it won’t be safer”, she replied. “Imagine, would it be better if you disappeared instead of sleeping in your house?”
She made sense. Your friends or parents won’t find you for a few days. You hope you will return until they start panicking.
“Alright”, you said. “Where is the path?”
“You're better off pretending that you're just another lost mortal”, she said while taking you outside the castle. “God knows what they will do if you find out who you are”.
You stopped at the beginning of the forest. Morpheus once told you that you shouldn’t go there alone. So that is entrance of fairy realm.
“Our lord usually teleports there, but you can’t”, Lucienne explained. “You need to go there through the forest”.
“And pretend to be lost”, you admitted. “What do I need?”
“Courage and knowledge”, Lucienne said. “I’m afraid if I give you something, they won’t believe that you are just lost”.
“Right,”, you agreed.
“They won’t give him up without a challenge”, she said. “She probably doesn’t want to give him up at all. So you need to figure out the plan”.
“I will figure out something while going through the forest, you replied. “Thanks for your help, Lucienne. I will save him”.
“I wish you luck”, she said.
And you started your way through the woods. First, the forest was green and in bloom, like in the spring. You could hear the birds' songs and feel warm. Then it became hot. There was probably a summer. Lucienne didn’t tell you that there are seasonal changes. And after that, the leaves became yellow and red. Perhaps, it was already fall.
You started to wonder if you could feel hunger in the dream and in the fairy realm. Or tiresome? When you decided to take a little rest and sat on the fallen tree, you heard the voice.
“Human? What are you doing here?” The voice was female and sounded like a child's. Can it be a fairy somewhere nearby?
“I’m lost”, you replied. “Who are you?”
“I can’t tell you my name”, she said. “The name has the power. If someone finds out your true name, it gives him power over you.”.
“I see”, you only replied.
“Where are you going?” she asked.
“I don’t know," you said, remembering Lucienne’s warnings. You don’t need to tell anyone about your plans. “I am looking for the way out of the woods”.
“But you are on the right way to our queen’s castle”, she admitted. “Are you trying to tell me that you are not looking for the castle?”
“I… Can I actually go there?” You were playing a dangerous game.
“You can, but you shouldn’t”, the fairy replied. “You should be more careful”.
At that moment, you realized that vines and roots had started to entwine your legs. And you jumped up and tore them apart.
“Very funny”, you noticed.
“Well, you did that, did you?” she asked. “Now I know that you are smart enough to help me”.
“It is a funny way to ask someone for help”, you noticed. “You distracted me. And they could kill me or prevent me from going anywhere”.
"Oh, common”, she said. “If I wanted to kill you, I wouldn’t warn you. It was just a little fun. Now, please help me”.
"How can I help if I don’t see you”, you replied.
“You need to come on my voice”, she said. “One man trapped me in the tree. You need to find me in the forest”.
“There are plenty of trees”, you admitted. “Can’t you be more specific?”
“You will understand when you find out”, she said, very vaguely. “Just come on, my voice. You will hear it more clearly when you come closer”.
“In what direction?” you asked.
“I suppose it’s on your way to the winter forest”, she replied.” Hurry up before my captor returns! What are you waiting for?”
“You are so demanding”, you sighed, continuing your way. “How did he trap you?”
“He lures me in with sweets”, she replied. “But don’t try this on me. I won’t be caught twice with the same trick”.
“And how should I call you?” you asked.
“Call me Rose”, she said. “It’s a good name. And you?”
“Mara”, you smiled.
“You learned your lesson”, she admitted.
“Okay, if you want me to find you, then you should talk, so I won’t lose your signal”, you said.
“You see the tree and understand where I am”, she said.
And so, for the next hour, you let her lead you through the woods. And soon you will come to the winter forest. It was only mildly cold. You won’t freeze to death in your white dress.
“Here it is”, said Rose finally.
And you see the blooming magic tree. Yes, you can’t pass through it. And some iron things prevent the fairy from going out of the tree.
“Oh, finally,” said the tiny fairy with wings and pink hair. “I became weak. Now I own you a life dept. And I am going to pay when you need it.”.
“You shouldn’t”, you said, trying to decline the offer.
“No, I will pay”, she insisted. “Now, let me take you through this wood to the kingdom. You wanted it, did you?”
You should be careful now. Furthermore, you should not show a lot of interest in her offer. Because then they can find out why you are here.
“I can?” you asked hesitantly.
“I can take you here”, she said. “But then you will be on your own. I don’t know if they decide to make you a slave or something else”.
What an optimistic perspective, you think. It is too late to go back. I have knowledge. That will be my weapon.
“Alright”, you said. “I always want to see what the fairy kingdom is like. I just shouldn’t eat your food, right?”
"That's a little more complicated”, she laughed. “Alright, let’s go”.
“Your queen…” you began the conversation. “What is she like?”
"Oh, she is very beautiful”, she said. “What did you read in books about fairies? That we kidnap children and girls?”
“Mostly”, you agreed. “And that you can’t be trusted. And you have a specific kind of humor that can be deadly to us”.
 “You know a lot”, she laughed. “I will give a piece of advice. Don’t show them that you know something. Better be underestimated”.
“Thank you”, you smiled.
“How did it happen that you appeared in the fairy woods while dreaming”, she said. “Do you want to be there?”
“Maybe, but I didn’t realize it”, you said. “I didn’t even know that I could come there in my dreams”.
And it was true. Morpheus didn’t tell you about that.
“You are fortunate”, she said. “Or not. You won’t just dance and eat. They will make you do different tasks”.
Yes, you know. Like dancing all day long, solving riddles, or telling stories. Or maybe they just make you a slave, like Rose said.
“Are you not afraid?” she asked.
“A little”, you shrugged. “I suppose curiosity is bigger than fear”.
"We're almost there”, she admitted.
And she was right. You came to the beautiful meadow and the castle very quickly. You were very nervous. Likewise, you didn’t know what to expect or how to find Morpheus in a discreet way. You were planning to think about it on your way. But then you met Rose. Well, you need to improvise now.
“This castle is beautiful”, you admitted.
“It is”, the fairy confirmed.
You see a lot of fairies having fun outside the castle. They were all so different. And all of them were looking at you with hungry curiosity. You felt like a mouse surrounded by cats.
“Rose”, a tall, blonde, and handsome fairy, approached you. “Our queen was looking for you. Where were you? Hunting the human?”
“No, I was trapped”, she replied. “And that human helped me. She wanted to see our kingdom, so I took her here”.
The man looked at you with curiosity. You looked at me in response. You can’t be shy, but you pretend to be awed. Likewise, you do indeed see the handsome man for the first time.
“You are cute”, he smirked. “You can be mine”.
“No”, Rose replied instead of you. “She came with me, so she stays with me as well. You can find another mortal”.
“Anyway, the queen wants to see both of you”, he said. “Let’s go before she gets angry”.
And you followed them. Everyone was still looking at you. Titania was indeed beautiful. With her raven-black hair and white skin. She looked at Rose first.
“Where have you been?” she asked. “I was looking for you”.
“I’m sorry, my queen,”, Rose said, looking down. “I was trapped”.
“And what about this mortal?” asked Titania. “Did you finally find a toy ?”
“I helped her”, you said, and the fairy queen looked at you. “I found her in the woods, and she brought me here”.
“And what did you do in the fairy woods, mortal?” she asked.
“I was lost”, you replied. “So I think it’s fortunate that we found each other, your majesty. Your kingdom is beautiful”.
“Very well, you can stay here”, Titania said. “But she is her responsibility now, Rose. OR you know what you can do”.
You felt that you didn’t like what she meant. But suddenly, a big black cat appeared near Titania. And when you caught the glaze of his blue eyes, you felt something familiar. Can it be? But he hissed and tried to escape.
"Oh, darling, don’t be naughty to our guests”, Titania said in a sweet voice. “You have nothing to worry about”.
You were almost sure that it was Morpheus in the form of a cat.
@shadowqueen1318 @mypsychoticlove @justathirstyhoe​ @ladymoztaza @sapphireonline @deniixlovezelda
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specialagentlokitty · 2 years ago
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Mr Evershed x Student!reader - don’t be scared
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Hi! Can you please write about a bullying story of a Student? The student is afraid of going to school, so the student skipped school and Mr. Evershed noticed it and help the student - Anon💜
Mr Evershed didn’t notice at first that you weren’t attending school, but when he got a list of students who hadn’t shown up for a few days he frowned when he saw your name.
“(Y/N)?”
“Not the first time, won’t be the last.” Mrs Carp shrugged.
She walked away and he sighed, starting his calls to the parents of the absent kids.
All of them answered and gave him some sort of excuse, sickness, holiday, just didn’t want to go in. The usual stuff.
When he came to your contacts, he tried your mother first, then your father, and neither picked up so he tried the house phone.
It rang, and eventually cut off and he sighed, deciding to try again shortly.
He never did get through, so he tried emailing your parents instead, including both of them and you in the email to see if anyone would reply.
It was towards the end of the day when an email come through and it was from your father.
He explained that both of them were currently out of the country for work, and you were in your own with your neighbour occasionally checking up on you and a phone number and address at the bottom.
He decided called your neighbour who said she knew you were home but was going to check up on you shortly when she was home from work and offered for him to come with her.
He immediately agreed, it wasn’t like you to skip school, not that he knew off, so he pulled up your attendance record.
There was a lot of missed days, all spread out throughout the years that you had been at the school, all of them left without answers as to why you weren’t in.
When school ended, he grabbed his things and made his way over to your neighbours house, and climbed out of his car to find her waiting by her front door.
“Mr Evershed?”
“Yes, you must be Mrs Patterson, thank you for this. I noticed (Y/N) has a lot of absent days over the past through years, could you give me any help as to why that would be?” He asked.
Mrs Patterson shook her head, crossing her arms over her chest as she flicked her gaze to the house across the street.
“No, all I can tell you is I’ve been watching that kid since they were little, parents always going away for long periods of time.”
“Yeah, their dad replied saying it was work.”
Mrs Patterson scoffed and shook her head again.
“Work my ass. No, they’re not working, they just take long expensive trips away. Since (Y/N) is older now they’re gone pretty much all year round. They’re in though, saw them coming back from the shops on my way home.”
Mr Evershed followed the woman to your house as she let herself in and he stepped in after her, letting her close the door.
Music sounded through the house, making it hard to hear anything, and you wondered across the top of the stairs and vanished.
“Hold on, I’ve got a trick for this, give it a minute.”
Mr Evershed watched curiously to see what she was going to do, and when she saw the landing light flick on she reached up to the fuse box, flicking a switch a few times turning it on and off before leaving it on and closing the box again.
You turned the music off and walked to the stairs, sitting on the top one as you looked at her.
“You’re gonna break it doing that and you’re paying for it.”
“Yeah I’ll pay for it if it comes to that, I came to check on you and I have a guest, you gonna come down?”
You shrugged and stood up, walking down the stairs you gestured for them to follow you into the kitchen and started to look through the cupboards.
“Want a drink or whatever?” You asked.
“No thanks love, I’m just here because your teacher wants a chat with you.”
You looked at your teacher and he smiled softly.
“If you’re offering I’ll have a cup of tea?”
“Sure. Why’re you here sir?”
“I think you know why (Y/N), you’ve been gone nearly a week.”
You shrugged a little and set his tea on the table as you sat down opposite him, resting your chin on your hand as you looked at him.
“Been busy.”
“(Y/N) you know this isn’t acceptable behaviour, you can’t take any more days off.” He sighed.
“Why? I’m still learning, online classes and all that.”
“But you still legally need to attend school, it’s not an option you’re a smart kid you know this.”
“Well I’ve got better things to do.” You snapped.
Standing up, you stormed away and Mrs Patterson sighed, holding a hand up to Mr Evershed.
“Give me a few minutes please?”
“Of course.”
She left and he sipped on the tea you made him, scrunching his nose a little at the strong taste but he couldn’t help but smile.
You tried you best to make it for him, so he was still going to sit there and drink it.
Mrs Patterson walked up to your room and knocked on the open door and you looked up from your laptop.
“I’m not talking about it.”
“Someone has to sweetheart, you know that. He’s your headteacher right? He can help.” She said softly.
She walked over and sat next to you.
“It’s just going to make it worse Mary, you know it will it’s why I don’t want to tell anyone about it, at least being at home they forget I exist, I can study only peacefully.”
“And when they find out you didn’t finish school?”
“I’ll figure something out.. I’ll.. I’ll get a job! I’ll get two jobs if I have too!”
Mrs Patterson sighed.
“And when your parents find out?”
“They don’t care, you know that. Aside from you, no one cares…”
She placed a hand on your shoulder, gently squeezing your shoulder.
“You have a man down there, a headteacher non the less who has taken time out of his busy day because he’s worried about you. He’s worried about you and how much time you’ve had off and he wants to help you. Just give him a chance to help you.” She whispered.
You shook your head.
“No… i.. he can’t help…”
“Just give Mr Evershed a chance, I don’t think he’s just going to drop this and you know that. He’s going to keep coming back and coming back until you let him help you. You’re going to get bored of him getting involved, so why not just tell him now? I’ll even tell him for you if you want me to? I just want you to get back into school so you can pass.”
You sighed, because you knew she had a point and you looked up at her.
“Okay.. okay, but I don’t want to be here when you talk to him. I’m gonna go for a walk, do you need anything?”
“Just some milk, I’m just going to pinch your open carton.”
You smiled and nodded and grabbed your jacket, jogging down the stairs you went into the kitchen to grab your phone.
“Going out, Mary wants to talk to you, later.”
With that you left and Mrs Patterson came down and she finally explained everything to Mr Evershed.
He carefully listened and he felt his heart break a little.
He knew bullying was a problem among some students but to hear you were absolutely terrified to come back to school.
“Is there anything that can help?” He asked.
“Honestly I have no clue. They’re too scared to step foot anywhere near the school, they only leave this house when they know other students are in class.”
“It’s that bad?”
Mrs Patterson nodded her head and sighed heavily softly.
“Unfortunately no, but… well.. could you try picking them up after classes start? Let them sit in a quiet room and leave before other students leave?”
“That’s.. that’s not really appropriate.”
“I know, but I can’t afford to take any time of work right now, and (Y/N) won’t come in alone.”
“I’ll see what I can do to arrange their classes differently, thank you for your time.”
Mr Evershed left and went back to his house while he thought what he could do the next day.
You woke up pretty early, and you got ready for the day, making your way down the stairs you grabbed your Xbox controller and turned it on, looking for a game to play.
You played for maybe an hour before there was a knock on your door.
Getting up, you walked over and swung the door open.
���Sir?”
“(Y/N), unfortunately I’m here to drag you to school.”
“Absolutely not.”
You walked away and he stayed at your doorway, leaning against it.
“I know you’re scared (Y/N), I know that. But I have a way to help you if you just trust me a little I can get you back into school, get your attendance up and your grades back up as well.”
“Yeah until they start up again.” You called.
“No, they won’t. Because I’ve done this.”
He took a step in a set a bit of paper on the floor and took a step back out and watched as you came back around the corner and picked it up.
You read it carefully.
“Immediate suspension?”
Mr Evershed smiled at you and nodded his head.
“Bullying won’t be tolerated (Y/N), and I want you to come back, so, will you please get in the car?”
“I’m in the middle of a game…”
He sighed, rolling his eyes a little bit.
“How long?”
“Like half hour?”
He gestured for you to go on and stepped inside the house to start gathering up your school stuff.
He managed to find your bag and keys, and he went into the kitchen to find something for you to take for lunch.
“Where’s your lunch?” He called.
“I don’t have one! I won’t get paid until next week!” You called back.
He nodded to himself and walked into the living room, waiting for you to finish your game and then he looked at you before you stated another round.
“Go get your uniform, quickly now.”
“Ugh fine.”
You went upstairs and came down with your tie over your head and you tossed your bag on your shoulder and picked up your keys.
“(Y/N) get your tie of your head.” Mr Evershed chuckled.
“Bet.”
You took your tie off and stuffed it into your pocket and walked out to get in the car and he got in, driving to the shops first where he gestured for you to go in.
“Get your lunch.”
“Why?”
“Because you need to eat and I have money, so get your lunch or I’ll pick it instead.”
“Alright, alright.”
You picked a few things and showed him, and you both waited in line while he held the basket in his hand and he realised you still weren’t wearing your tie.
“Please put your tie on.”
“I can’t do it.”
“Who does it for you?”
“Mary or Loraine when I come in.”
He nodded and set your things down, paying for them he walked back to the car and put them in the seat before holding out his hand.
You titled your head a little in confusion and high fives him.
“No, I want the tie, but thanks.” He laughed.
You laughed a little and handed him your tie, letting him do it for you and finally you were in your way to school and you were terrified.
Sitting in the parking lot, you looked at the building.
“No one’s going to bother you anymore, okay? I promise.”
“H.. how can you be sure…?”
“Because you’re going to have separate classes for a few weeks, and once we’ve fully enforced the bullying rules and I feel like you can safely go back to normal classes you’ll be introduced slowly.”
He got out the car and grabbed your lunch and watched as you stood by the car and walked over.
“Come on, alright? It’s okay, I promise. My door is always going to be open to you.”
He smiled and you looked at him, and slowly you stared to follow behind him towards his office for an official about your attendance issues.
You felt scared, but knowing that your headteacher was going to support you made you feel a little better, you just wished you didn’t have to go to school
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doppotranslations · 1 year ago
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Monthly △- First issue ~ Special Edition! Haunted House and Rumors of Aliens - Part 1
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Hypmic ARB in-game event story (Rei, Jakurai, Kuko)
Recording Link: https://youtu.be/GdW-6ei4FBQ (in case you wanna read along with the in-game voice lines and sound effects :D)
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Chapter 1
[At the temple]
Kuko: Zzz…Zzz…Zzz…Zzz…Zzz…Zzz… *turns over* Zzz…Zzz…Zzz…Zzz…Zzz…Zzz…
Kuko’s Dad: That’s bad karma! *hits him*
Kuko: Gueh! The hell are you doin’ you damn old man!!
Kuko’s Dad: How many times do I have to tell you not to sleep in the main hall!? You stupid brat!! *hits him*
Kuko: Gyah!! Guooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!! Kuko’s Dad: You have a visitor.
???: Hehe. Parent child relationships, am I right?
Kuko’s Dad: No, this is… something pretty embarrassing…
Kuko: Ah?
Rei: Yo!
Kuko: You are Osaka’s…
Kuko’s Dad: Now then, please enjoy your stay.
Rei: *enters* Pardon the intrusion.
Kuko: …What do you want?
Rei: Do you only get visited when someone needs something from you?
Kuko: You careless bastard… Rei: Ahahaha!!
Kuko: …Well, the hell you want?
Rei: Right! Thing is, if I’m being honest, there is one favor I would like to ask of you. Kuko: …a favor?
Rei: Actually, recently I’ve heard… this odd yet interesting story.
Kuko: Quit wastin’ my time and get to the point already!
Rei: Jeez, you’re so damn impatient. Come on, this is important and it could really interest you.
Kuko: And I am really busy. Rei: Busy napping, is that right?
Kuko: Shut the fuck up! I’m busy sleeping!
Rei: Alright, if you say so… I’ll get to the gist of it. There is a strange rumor going around about a house that no one who enters makes it out alive. Kuko: The hell is up with that…?
Rei: The story goes like this… A decade ago… There was a family of 3 who had something strange happen to them. It is unknown why, but the father suddenly went mad and murdered his wife and daughter. Kuko: That is a very sad story…
Rei: These days this kind of thing is pretty rare, isn’t it?
Kuko: That house is the one you mentioned earlier, isn’t it?
Rei: Yes. The wife who was murdered… Sayako’s curse is what kills those who enter, or so they say.
Kuko: I can see that. And you came to my place so that we can verify if that is true, right?
Rei: You’re right, that’s all there is to it. I imagine a monk like you is able to perform an exorcism or two.
Kuko: Right…
Rei: Good! Then it’s decided! We’re going to that house right away!
Kuko: No way, I don’t get it at all! Why the hell do you care so much about this whole thing!?
Rei: Actually, I researched and developed some devices that can take down ghosts.
Kuko: Huh?
Rei: I’m eager to test them out. Kuko: Then just go by yourself…
Rei: If by any chance I don’t manage to beat them myself, won’t I be screwed? I don’t want to die yet, you know?
Kuko: I refuse.
Rei: Hey hey, don’t say that. Do you really think you’ll reach enlightenment as a monk who’s afraid of a puny ghost?
Kuko: Tch… Fine, fine. I’ll come with if I really have to.
Rei: Hehe. That’s the spirit.
Kuko: So, where is this place?
Rei: In Shinjuku.
Chapter 2
[At a restaurant]
Jakurai’s Friend: Long time no see, Jakurai!
Jakurai: Yes, that’s right. Are you doing good… well, you probably aren’t if you had to see me… How are things going?
Jakurai’s Friend: Yeah… Well, it’s a bit…
Jakurai: …You seemed to be concerned about something when you called me today, were you not?
Jakurai’s Friend: Huh? As usual, you’re so perceptive it’s creeping me out.
Jakurai: Is that so? What’s the matter then?
Jakurai’s Friend: …what I’m about to say is probably gonna sound pretty crazy. Well, I can't deny that I laid my eyes on something I thought was really strange. Though, I know for sure that I am not crazy… Jakurai: …
Jakurai’s Friend: You know I work in real estate, right?
Jakurai: Yes, so I’ve heard. Is your company not doing great?
Jakurai’s Friend: Not at all, our sales go up every single year, I couldn’t possibly ask for better results.
Jakurai: Then what are you worried about?
Jakurai’s Friend: My company bought a psychologically affected property for cheap, since we tend to achieve the best results by selling properties we fully renovate.
Jakurai: Psychologically affected?
Jakurai’s Friend: Psychologically affected property… A property where a murder took place, or a suicide, or an accidental death, so-called stigmatized property.
Jakurai: I see… Well then what’s the problem with this stigmatized property?
Jakurai’s Friend: It’s a house that kills you upon entering it…
Jakurai: Eh…?
Jakurai’s Friend: It’s a house that kills you upon entering it… or so they say…
Jakurai: …
Jakurai’s Friend: I know it sounds completely absurd… still there were people interested in moving there of course… However, as more and more private viewings went on, both clients and employees alike started passing away one by one…
Jakurai: That can’t be… that is…
Jakurai’s Friend: *smashes table* IT’S ALL TRUE!!
Jakurai: Calm down…
Jakurai’s Friend: I’m sorry…
Jakurai: Maybe that property is…?
Jakurai’s Friend: Yeah, I’ve been inside one time… Jakurai: But, you’re alive, aren’t you…?
Jakurai’s Friend: I entered a few days ago. There was this woman…
Jakurai: Woman…?
Jakurai’s Friend: She had long hair, she appeared to be wearing a pure white dress…
Jakurai: I understand the situation, but what do you want me to do about it…? The issue at hand seems to be a paranormal phenomenon, which is something I don’t think I’d be able to help with…
Jakurai’s Friend: I see… If that’s what you think… then I’ll have to find someone else to rely on for this… I’m sorry about all this… you can forget it…
Jakurai: Wait.
Jakurai’s Friend: ……
Jakurai: If someone proved that entering that residence doesn’t kill them, will your fears about that place vanish?
Jakurai’s Friend: W-well… 
Jakurai: Then I’ll go inside that house, so that I can prove it to you.
[At the house]
Rei: There it is… from the outside it looks just like any plain old house.
Kuko: …! Rei: Mm, whaat? Did you get a cold sweat or somethin’?
Kuko: This place is bad news… No way in hell we goin’ in there…
Rei: Huh~? It doesn’t look like it to me… For times like these… *pulls out a weird device* Tadaa~! It’s my Spirit-o-Meter!
Kuko: Huh? What the fuck is that…
Rei: Oh it’s just a lil’ somethin’ I invented, it’s a machine that measures the power of the grudges of spirits. Switching it on will display the numerical value of their power-…seriously? It’s not picking up anything.
Kuko: If that gizmo is the real thing, then I must have misinterpreted my senses…
???: Oya, it’s you two…
Kuko and Rei: !?
Chapter 3
[At the house]
Jakurai: It sure is strange meeting you here, isn’t it?
Rei: Strange or not strange… What in the world are you doing here…
Jakurai: …I’m here to help out a friend-
Kuko: Fucking idiot! Dumbass! Do you even understand what kind of place you’re in?!
Jakurai: It’s a house that kills you upon entering it…
Kuko: ! If you knew then why the fuck did you enter?!
Jakurai: My friend is extremely afraid of entering this place. I thought that if I were to enter it safely, he could feel some relief over this.
Kuko: Tch… ain’t no way in hell this place is a fake!
Jakurai: Oh, you think so?
Rei: Hey, this really is a haunted house. The place is also extremely dangerous.
Jakurai: That can’t be…
Kuko: Yeah it can…  I was able to sense a negative energy that is probably what haunts this place.
Jakurai: That sounds nonscientific…
Kuko: If for some goddamn reason you don’t believe me and keep going, you’ll get yourself killed…
Jakurai: …
Rei: Oi, Harai…
Kuko: Yes… looks like that geezer will be joining us…
???: A, A, A, A, A, A, A, A, A, A, A…
Jakurai: A voice…?
Sayako: A, A, A, A, A, A, A, A, A, A, A!!!
Jakurai, Kuko, Rei: !?
Jakurai: W-what the…! What’s with that woman!?
Rei: For times like these, lil’ old me has developed just the thing…*pulls out a weird device* Tadaaa! The Ghost Vacuuminator~! This bad boy will suck in that ghost chick in no time~... Here goes nothin’!
Sayako: A, A, A, A, A, A, A, A, A, A, A!!!
Rei: Whaa… Looks like it’s not suckin’er up all the way in…
Sayako: A, A, A, A, A, A, A, A, A, A, A!!!
Kuko: Move! BEGONE!!!!!
Sayako: A, A, A, A, A, A, A, A, A, A, A!!!
Kuko: DISAPPEAR!!!!!!!!!!
Sayako: !!! *disappears*
Kuko: *pants*
Rei: Amazing! It’s over?
Kuko: Nope… That’ll only keep’er away for a while… It wasn’t a complete exorcism…
Rei: It got pretty dangerous once that thing came out…
Kuko: Yeah… That chick didn’t look like she wanted to listen at all…
Jakurai: It looks like you saved me… Thank you…
Kuko: …this ain’t the time to feel relieved. If this keeps going you’ll surely end up dead…
Jakurai: …
Rei: Ahaha! Super-Monk Harai-san will save Jinguji! If that’s the case lil’ old me will stick around too.
Kuko: Tch… I can’t guarantee I’ll do it, but I’ll try my best…
Jakurai: I’m saved…
Rei: Well, Kukoooo-saan, what do we do next?
Kuko: My power won’t be of any help against that thing… Goddamn the only choice I got left is borrowing my old man’s power…
Rei: Well, looks like your father will have to go on a lil’ business trip and come all the way from Nagoya. We better get some food and drinks then.
Jakurai: …well then, if it’s alright with you two, would you like to come over and stay at my house? I’d like to treat you to a meal.
Kuko: Is that really ok?
Jakurai: Allow me to do this much, please.
Chapter 4
[At a café]
Gentaro: I’m thinking perhaps my next manuscript should be occult themed. 
Editor: Ooh, that sounds great! I think Yumeno-sensei’s horror stories are sure to get many fans! However, that’s unusual, isn’t it?
Gentaro: It’s certainly a genre that I’m not too proficient at, thus I believe it would prove to be rather challenging.
Editor: That’s some superb ambition! I sure would love being your apprentice.
Gentaro: If that’s the case, hath thou ever experienced something that’s left thee utterly speechless?
Editor: Utterly speechless, huh… N-no… I’ve witnessed no such event… As you can see, I am a pretty boring man.
Gentaro: Thou ought not belittle yourself in such a manner.
Editor: Ahaha… don’t worry about it…
Gentaro: Hmm… If I am to write such fiction, then where shall I gather intel? Where shall my ghost spotting take place, I wonder? 
Editor: Ghost spotting, huh… Shibuya proved to be a wonderful inspiration for your previous work. 
Gentaro: Perhaps it could work well. Perhaps it could truly be something to spark some inspiration.
Editor: If that’s the case, then please steer clear of any places where trespassing is forbidden.
Gentaro: Certainly. I am a moderately honest and serious man after all.
Edito: Well, then, have fun with that. *leaves*
Gentaro: Now then… (The internet will surely prove useful in finding a place to spot ghosts, will it not?)
[Out in the city]
Jyushi: Yeah~, getting to perform in Shibuya sure is exciting, isn’t it~
Member A: Yeah, we’ve finally been invited to play outside of Nagoya.
Jyushi: Right!
Member B: Say, Jyushi, shall we celebrate our debut?
Jyushi: Ah~, sorry but I gotta say no! I gotta go somewhere real quick!
Member A: Just make sure you don’t follow any strangers-
Jyushi: I am not that much of a child…
[At a café]
Store clerk: Welcome! Oh it’s a new face, isn’t it?
Jyushi: Y-Yesh. A n-new face.
Store clerk: Well then, please follow me to your table.
Jyushi: …
[Time Skip]
Store clerk: Here’s a deluxe classic parfait. Enjoy!
Jyushi: It came, it came, it sure came~ The parfait I chose over celebrating with the guys~ I’ll eat it right away!
Gentaro: Umm… that is…
Jyushi: Omnomnomnomnomnomnomnom.
Gentaro: Let’s see… there are some interesting people around… *gets up and walks* Hello.
Jyushi: Eh? Ah, Shibuya’s writer guy!
Gentaro: Shall we sit together?
Jyushi: Y-yes… G-go ahead…
Gentaro: Such a coincidence, is it not?
Jyushi: Y-yeah… sure is…
Gentaro: ………
Jyushi: …U-uh. Did you need something?
Gentaro: Is it really a bother if I came with no request and just came to chat?
Jyushi: Eh, no way… But, I don’t really know you that well and all…
Gentaro: No need to worry about it, as I do have a proper request.
Jyushi: …What is it?
Gentaro: Let’s go ghost spotting together!
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lunarsun12 · 4 months ago
Text
Hyunjin ‘Noona’ - Part 2/2
Masterlist
Previous Part
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Well when Hyunjin asked if Yeji delete the video…the answer is you all guessed is no. This then lead to the two of them bickering for 2 hours. Whilst the rest of the kids don’t know, how to react. Before hyunjin started to swear, Changbin immediately intervene.
Did Changbin intervene in time…before his two parents found out…
Back At SKZ Kids Chat
Today 21:00
Changbin🙄: Okay okay you two stop agruing who is better! Just delete the video and Hyunjin can be normal again
Seungmin🐶: C’mon Binnie don’t be a party pooper! Finally someone gets under hyunjin skin
Changbin🙄: I’m doing this! As hyunjin is about to say a bad word! FYI WE HAVE INNIE HERE!
Yeji👑: Ermmm about that…I have sent the video to Hyunjin Appa…out of anger as he won’t listen to me
Hyunjin🕺: YAH! I did everything you asked for! Our agreement!
Seungmin🐶: This is getting better!!
Felix☀️: I just heard Appa calling for hyunjin…
Yeji👑: I should go…I’m so sorry hyunjin! Please don’t be mad at me!
Yeji left the chat
Back at SKZ Family Chat
Bangchan🐺: HYUNJIN! You come out the bathroom right this minute! How many times did I told you…don’t annoy people
Hyunjin🕺: Darn you Yeji…You can’t make me! I was defending myself! Not my fault, people can’t handle the truth!
Bangchan🐺: You should thank your friend Yeji. For showing me this!
Han🐿️: I didn’t know this is the person Hyunjin is afraid of! She sure knows how to scold people
Lee Know🐱: Chan…please let me go kill someone! This lady almost killed my child! I won’t stand for this!
Hyunjin🕺: Yeah! Eomma I almost died!
Bangchan🐺: MINHO! How can you be so clueless! Your child is started this and he refused to apologise!
Few hours later…
Lee Know🐱: Innie! Why did you tell Appa! I’m going grocery shopping!
I.N🦊: You were holding a bat in your hand! You gonna hurt someone! You shouldn’t lie!
Bangchan🐺: Minho…everything is fine now…Hyunjin made up with his friend sister…he is back to his usual self
Lee Know🐱: Ohhhh, could have told me sooner!
Bangchan🐺: I did! You were ignoring as it is you and cat ‘spa’ time!
Previous Part
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Note
Christmas update on my best girl Lailah? If there's anything more to tell, you know
Lailah, the story that this is referencing.
The problem with Lailah is that I very firmly believe that her story is best left open ended - is it a tragedy? Does she survive? Who knows!!! So unfortunately I couldn't give you anything solid as a story per se, but I hope this works? I really enjoyed writing it.
The world ended, but you knew that already.  You’re not new to this, are you? It’s good to see you alive, it’s always good to see you alive.  I hope the winter hasn’t been too cold, I hope the heels of your shoes haven’t worn through.  Mine have but it’s fine, I’ll stitch them up no worries.  Anyway, back to the end of the world. 
I’m sure you know the drill by now.  In the aftermath you’ll find, dotted all over this island, what used to be a country but isn’t anymore, hospitals, office buildings, shopping malls, service stations, all converted into homes for those left behind (although by now most of them are second or third generation, it’s been a while since the end, you see).  People grew, they changed, they gave birth and died, they settled down and formed new communities.  And twisted among these people, snaking through the buildings like wind whispers, like threads of courage, are the stories.  Thousands of stories, repeated over and over until they lose one meaning and gain another.  The heart-blood of the survivors.  Usually I’d tell you one now, something steadfast and winding that might give you hope.  But today I’m afraid I don’t have anything solid, just rumours and gossip.  Not the sorts of things people would tell at firesides, but the short accounts they toss around at midday in the five minutes of rest before they have to be somewhere. 
One community of survivors arose in what used to be a shopping centre.  They call it the Hollows and it used to be under a cruel and vicious leadership.  One dictator rose and terrorized his people for years, spewing bile and blood and rage.  He fell at the hands of another, perhaps less brutal but still ruthless, still merciless.  Like a villain in a children’s book.  Eventually the people rose up against her, unable to live one more day without living, and she was run out of town.  That’s all we know for sure. 
A number of hunters say they killed that Evil Queen as she fled from them, left her body in the woods.  No one knows if they’re telling the truth or not. 
Some say the she got away, that she ran fast enough to escape them all (some even say she did it through magic and more people believe it then you might think).  She’s hiding somewhere now, plotting her revenge.  Parents tell their kids not to go out too far, otherwise she might jump out from the bushes and snatch them and eat them all up.  Some get scared by that but most children just laugh.   
Others, older, who were there when she was in charge, just shrug their shoulders.  They don’t know if she’s alive and they don’t care.  They threw her out once, they say, they can do it again if she comes back.  If she doesn’t, all the better.  She should be getting pretty old now herself anyway, if no one lets her in she won’t be able to enter.    
Sometimes rumours come from the north.  They talk about a woman at a sanctuary that used to be a hospital, a woman who looks very much like an old tyrant.  They say she’s happy now, that she draws little cartoons for the children, that she weeps a lot and laughs more, that she is quiet and kind and has secrets in her eyes that she will take to the grave.  They say if you ask she’ll just tell you that she’s trying to be better, that she’s trying to do better.  They say they’ve heard her thanking God and all that’s good that she managed to hang onto something decent inside her, she doesn’t know how but she did. 
But others say they’ve been there and never saw her there, never even heard of her. 
(If anyone remembers her real name, they don’t say it.)
I’m the teller, so I say she made it there, I say she’s happy.  I say her plan was liberation all along, to incite the people to free themselves.  After all, she used to illustrate children’s books, she knew the importance of a good villain.  She wrote a story of freedom and strength and rebellion that will be told for decades to come.  I think she gets a happy ending for that.  At the hospital her hands have finally started to feel clean again, she has forgotten how it feels to hold a gun, how it feels to wield power over those weeping terrified before her.  She has nightmares often, but her days are peaceful.  She can’t help in rebuilding the houses surrounding the Building much anymore, her back hurts too much now, but she paints the walls when she can and still cries over colours.  She had to build a world out of black and white, you see, had to fight to make sure no one ever saw the grey.  Shades still take her by surprise. 
But that’s just what I think, and there are thousands who would disagree with me.  She’s dead, they say, or gone, or evil, and really what evidence do you have she was even trying to be good? And even if she were, what evidence do you have that she managed to keep a hold of it? How does someone keep their soul when they do all that? It’s hardly possible, not here, not now.  It’s the end of the world, why do you keep telling stories about good things happening? Remember, much more awful has happened here than good, this is a tragedy more than it is anything.  Do you really understand what that means? Do you understand what has been lost? For all it is dressed up in flowery language and fancy metaphor, the fact is billions died, they are dead and gone and people screamed for them and are screaming still.  Their corpses are rotting.  The weeping in the night will never truly fade.  That’s what they say. 
Look, I’m sorry, I know it’s not much of a story but we’re both busy and there’s not time for a real story, not tonight.  And really my point is this, when I say the world has ended do you really think about what that means?  So much of what we take for granted is just what we make, what we choose to build into a world and now look, it’s shattered like ice.  We’re lost and frightened and so often horribly alone.  Things change faster than we can understand, we’re not made for it, not for this sorrow, not for this grief.  But we have to live through it somehow and we do.  So really that’s the point, that’s the choice: the story is yours.  You’re standing here looking at a barren broken world, at a planet with a hole at its centre.  Someone has to fill it up again, someone has to put something in it.  The story isn’t necessarily what happened, what happened is just facts.  The story is what’s true.  Do you want her to be wicked and cruel? Do you want her to have died alone in the woods? Or do you want her to have survived? Do you want her to have had a plan for goodness all along? Do you want there to be kindness hidden at the heart of it?
Then go tell a story that says that, go build a world in which it can be true.  It’s the end of the world and you’re still listening, that means it can be the beginning of one too.  Despite it all. 
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allykakamatsu · 1 year ago
Text
The Demon Siblings, Chapter 2
First
Rating: T
Original Characters
Chapter 2 Trigger Warning: Referenced past child abuse
Story as a whole loosely based on @yusuke-of-valla Demon Fam Au.
Henry swore that puberty wasn't meant to happen until you were a teenager, and if nothing else he knew it didn't involve growing horns.
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The Plan
9 years and 11 months ago, Henry
“Ugh…..” I groan as I wake up to the now familiar sight of obsidian walls and the large oak desk at the end of my bed. 
I also check the clock to see if I slept properly tonight, and…. Nope, it’s only 4 in the morning. Ah, dang it. The Burning Hells are starting to feel like home, but everything still feels so empty and, while I know no one here will hurt me anymore, unlike what dad apparently did, I’m still scared someone will try to kill me.
Still, speaking of Dad, least I didn’t have a nightmare about him tonight, and also no flesh demons who disliked Miss Aravni came in to try kill us so that’s an improvement at least, but doesn’t change the fact that I’m probably not getting back to sleep for a while so it’s time for some tea.
Before I do though I take a glance at my two honorary siblings to see if there awake and need some as well.
First I look like Ayra who’s been tossing and turning by the looks of her hair but outside of that she looks very peaceful, which isn’t a surprise, based on what she told us her home was the real hell so this place has been heaven for her. Meanwhile Yuna….. isn’t in her bed at all.
“Oh no…” I mumble as I slip on my slippers and sneak out of the room to try find her. Yuna’s pretty much been the complete opposite of Ayra, she still partially blames herself for her mother selling her to Aravni and while she’s getting along with all of us now she has been having a horrific time settling in.
After a bit I manage to make it to the kitchen, which is where we usually go when we have a bad time sleeping and don’t want to bother anyone else, and while I can’t see anyone else the lights are on so I know someone’s in here.
“Yuna? Are you in here?” I ask quietly as I close the door behind me, and as I do I hear a small yelp behind the giant counter so it looks like I was right.
“!! A Ah, Henry… you’re awake too….?” Yuna asks nervously as she barely peaks out.
“Yeah, still getting used to everything,” I tell her as I go to her but she backs away?, “hey, there’s nothing to be afraid of, I’m not going to judge you for having a nightmare.”
“N No…. It’s not that….,” she explains now fully hidden, “it’s…. This is happening again and I know you’ll hate me if you see it….”
Happening again? Wait, how has this happened before? “Hey, don’t worry, we’re technically family with demons now, in this month alone I’ve seen so much, whatever it is I won’t judge.”
After a few moments of awkward silence Yuna hesitantly peeks her head out again. “….. Promise?”
“I promise.” With that she hesitantly comes out with her usual long purple-ish blue hair, grey-blue eyes, her white nightdress and….. a pair of blue fox tails?! Wait, that is what she was so worried about?
“That’s what you were afraid of? Okay, it is very random, but that’s not too bad, but it’s also so adorable! They look so fluffy!”
“You…. You like them….?” Yuna asks looking surprised.
“Of course!,” I confirm with a smile as I hold her hands, “we’ll have to ask Queen Aravni what’s going on but these aren’t anything to be ashamed of.”
Yuna just stands there in shock for a moment before she starts crying?! “I…. This happened before and…. Mom freaked out and she said everyone else would hate me for it… so she took me to a doctor to cut them off…. The more I’ve been thinking about it….. the more I’m thinking this might’ve been the reason she was so ready to get rid of me…. So her ‘monster kid’ wouldn’t ruin her reputation…..And I was worried off you’d found out you’d try to cut them off too…”
“Well then she’s even worse than I thought,” I tell her, “look, I know most humans aren’t cool with demons, but any parent who’s going to cut something off their child just because they’re only worried about it hurting them and not the kid is horrible, and no one down here is going to do that to you here, okay?”
“….. Got it,” Yuna replies after calming down a little and smiling, “thank you Henry…”
“I’m glad I could help,” I assure her with a smile, making her smile more before looking confused, “huh? Is something wrong?”
“Um….” she mumbles before pointing at my head but not saying anything, so I hesitantly feel around up there….. only to grasp what feels like a pair of small horns?!
“Huh?!,” I yelp before running to the window because it’s closer than a mirror and yup I have a pair of small dark pink horns?!, “okay, let’s hope Queen Aravni is still awake because we have to ask her about this!”
“Ask Aravni about what?,” Ayra(?!) asks as she comes in before staring at us, “….. huh, you two have demon stuff, neat.”
“Thank you?” Yuna replies both relived and confused (oh god her mom really did traumatise her into thinking she was a freak didn’t she?)
“Sorry if I woke you.” I apologise as I assume me leaving is what woke her up.
“Eh, don’t worry about it,” Ayra assures me, “but I did pass Aravni’s door on the way here, there was a light under it so I do think she’s awake, so might as well ask her now.”
“Oh, that’s a relief.” I admit as I grab Yuna’s hand as the three of us leave the room and make it to the Demon Queen’s door and quietly open it and see she’s talking to two people, one is a very professional male Demon with grey hair and also has a tail and horns like Aravni albeit smaller and blue, and the other is a regal woman with dark grey hair wearing a black and grey wispy dress and had black horns and bat wings.
“-so in conclusion, we have eleven years roughly to do this before Gabriel tries to destroy us all.” The man explains sternly- wait destroy us?!
“Ugh, I knew this was coming, and at least we’re mostly prepared, but I still gotta deal with the seal so I can get out of here and help.” Aravni groans frustrated but not surprised.
“Well, that’s what the kids are for, isn’t it?” The woman asks somewhat coldly.
“Well it’s why I was making contacts with humans,” Aravni fires back, “but I was hoping for adults, not to drag innocent kids into this, especially since Henry and Ayra will barely be adults by then, and Yuna won’t even be that.”
“I know, trust me if it was Marianne I wouldn’t want her getting involved either,” the woman adds with her arms crossed, “but the barrier won’t be unstable enough for you to make any more contracts until about 3 years before the deadline, and that won’t be enough time to get any mortals ready.”
“Imogen is right your majesty, you have to tell them.” The man agrees making Aravni make an ‘I know’ face.
“Tell us what?” Ayra asks as she opens the door more and getting all three of the Demons attention.
“!! Kids! Wasn’t expecting you three up this late-!,” Aravni yelps looking surprised before that surprise gets mixed with joy, “oh my god you’re half demons and you all look adorable!!”
“Half-AGH!!” Yuna yelps as the demon queen swoops all of us up into a hug.
“…..To be a bit more specific,” the woman Imogen chimes in after looking at us puzzled for a moment, “the boy is half Demon, the younger girl is half Kitsune, and the older girl is a Witch.”
“A Witch? Haven’t heard that one before. Also Aravni can you put us down please.” Ayra states bluntly.
“Ah, sorry, I’m just so proud of my little babies!” Aravni apologises as she puts us down while cooing.
“Ahem, continuing,” the man states while clearing his throat, “a Witch is essentially a human with the potential to use demon magic, they’re our equivalent to Exorcists.”
“Pfft, Father will be so mad if he ever finds out.” Ayra says with a chuckle.
“S Still… are you sure…?,” Yuna asks nervously, “K Kitsune’s have always seemed so pretty but kinda scary in the pictures…. If Mom’s reaction is anything to go by then I’m just the latter…. A And before you say it I know I shouldn’t be listening to what she says but….. well until I came here she was pretty much the only person I was ever able to talk to….. So she’s really my main reference for things….”
“….. We’re killing her in a few years right?” Imogen asks after a few moments of stunned silence making Yuna go pale.
“Ehe, she’s just joking,” Aravni assures her but gives Imogen a look that screams ‘we’ll plan it when the kids aren’t here’, “but yeah, you are, and you are adorable Yuna sweetie!”
“….. Ehe, thank you Miss Aravni.” Yuna replies with a smile and… oh my god her tails wag when she’s happy that’s adorable!! Ahem… better not let her hear that, that’ll probably freak her out any more.
“Ahem, anyway,” I say turning to the guy, “what were you all talking about mister?”
“Just call me Seth,” he introduces professionally, “but to make a long story short well, how to I explain this in a way kids raised in the mortal realm would get….the God of this world, Gabriel, he only cares for two things, mortals and angels obeying him, and exterminating all demons.”
“Pretty much, but he doesn’t even care about them either, he’ll happily kill them if they disobey him or just to get to a Demon,” Imogen continues still stone faced but now her eyes are hiding rage, “and now he’s planning on proving it by going through all of humanity to get to us.”
“!!! W W Why?!” I ask now freaking out while an even more afraid Yuna is holding on to Ayra who’s looking panicked for the first time since we got here.
“He’s an emotionless bastard who thinks we’re abominations that’s why,” Aravni answers also getting annoyed, “that’s why I was making the soul contracts to begin with. The only way to stop him is the seven divine weapons, and Demons can’t touch those so I was trying to get some humans on my side.”
“Instead, our asshole parents gave you us instead,” Ayra finishes, “so unless you can get more contracts out we’ve gotta get those weapons.”
“Pretty much,” Aravni admits with a sigh, “I’m sorry to put this on you kids but short of a miracle I don’t think the barrier will weaken enough for me to get anyone else in time.”
“It’s fine your Majesty,” I assure the Demon Queen as I do my best to try be the emotionally stable one, “at least we have a few years to prepare, and hey, I did always like the idea of being a hero so I guess it all works out.”
“Y You’re taking this really well Henry…” Yuna mumbles looking as terrified as she was on her first day.
“Ehe, better look on the bright side then be afraid,” I admit as I mess with her hair a little, “and hey, this is a good way to prove to our parents that we’re worth more than what they sold us for and show them up, no faster way to be well liked than being a hero and saving the world.”
“A hero….,” Yuna mumbles a bit before looking up with a determined smile, “that…. Sounds nice.”
“Welp, if there was ever any doubt that I was in, you two agreeing put them to rest,” Ayra adds smirking, “though now I’ve gotta come up with some plans for when we go back up.”
“Yay!! Sibling adventure!!” Raquel says as she gets out from under the bed- wait Raquel?!
“AH!!” Yuna yelps as she jumps onto me, making Ayra chuckle and the rest of the adults look not impressed.
“Aravni, I thought you said Raquel didn’t sneak in this time?” Seth asks with a sigh as Imogen just rolls her eyes.
“I did, I checked under the bed and she wasn’t there,” Aravni defends herself  before turning to her daughter, “and sweetie I thought I told you to stay out of these meetings.”
“You did, but I don’t care,” Aravni fires back, “this stuff involves me too, and I’m not a kid anymore mom, I’m seventeen thousand. I can’t afford to just sit outside and wait for you to tell me the news in the most PG way possible, I’m the Princess of the Burning Hells, I need to know this stuff so I can keep my home safe.”
“She’s right and you guys know it.” A new voice chimes in from under the bed and who crawls out is a girl about Raquel’s age with short ‘so dark it’s almost black’ grey hair, grey eyes, black horns, a pair of small grey wings at her hips and wearing a long and elegant black, white and purple dress.
“What the- Marianne you too?” Imogen asks with a ‘I’m not mad I’m just disappointed’ face.
“I’m sorry Mother,” Marianne apologises with a bow before standing firm, “but Raquel is right, this concerns us and we’re old enough, we have the right to know.”
“Okay, before we continue, is anyone listening in?” Seth asks with a glare- wait why did Ayra pull me and Yuna back-?!
“AGH!!!” Ryoko(?!) yelps as she falls out of an air vent, quickly followed by Akio and a demon boy I don’t recognise with brown hair, a ‘business style that I can still kick your ass in’ outfit, and eyes, tail and horns that match Seth- oh.
“Big brother, your majesty, Lady Imogen, I’m sorry, they talked me into it…” the new guy apologises to the three while Ryoko gives a ‘worth it’ smirk and Akio just facepalms.
“Markus, we’ll talk about this more later,” Seth tells his embarrassed younger brother before sighing, “and as much as you all spying on us is obnoxious, you do have a point.”
“Hmm….,” Aravni hums before her eyes light up a little, “adults huddle! Kids give us a few seconds!” With that, and Imogen eye rolling, the adults huddle up leaving the rest of us to stand and wait.
“Um, congrats on the demon thing by the way.” Akio tells us somewhat awkwardly to break the silence.
“Agreed, you’re even more awesome and kick ass now!” Raquel adds while messing with our hair.
“How many times are you going to keep doing that?” Ayra asks semi annoyed but still clearly enjoying it.
“Ehe, glad to see you and your new siblings are getting along so well Raquel,” Marianne chuckles before looking a bit shocked, “oh! I should probably introduce myself properly, I’m Marianne, it’s a pleasure to meet you three.”
“Same here,” I agree with a little bow, “I’m Henry, and these are my new little siblings Ayra and Yuna.”
“He’s only older by two months.” Ayra grumbles while Yuna shyly waves.
“I know the feeling, Seth is only older by two hundred years and now I never hear the end of it,” Markus adds with a sigh, “oh, I’m Markus by the way, though you probably already got that.”
“Yay! We’re all introduced now!” Ryoko cheers  with her big flappy sleeves going wild, but before anyone can say anything else the adults end their huddle.
“Alright,” Imogen states looking not the most pleased but accepted what’s happening, “we have decided to let you all in on everything from now on, but, if we’re telling you, all of you have to be all in.”
“All in on what Lady Imogen?” Akio asks as I start getting nervous and excited.
“The plan to get the weapons!,” Aravni continues, “Henry, Ayra and Yuna are the only three who can use them, but they’re going to need help to get to them, so if we tell you what’s going on, you’re going up to the mortal realm with them and helping with the mission. So, you kids in?”
“Do you even need to ask Mom, of course we’re in!” Raquel agrees with everyone else nodding to confirm, though Markus does look a tad more nervous so I squeeze his hand to try calm him down.
“Alright then,” Seth states as Aravni looks proud and Imogen pulls Marianne aside for what looks like a ‘concerned parent’ talk, “it’s late even by demon standards and we were about to wrap this meeting up anyway so you all go back to sleep. I’ll fill Mahiro and Saya in on the fact there’s going to be a…. Few more people in on the plan now, and we’ll go into more details in the morning, okay?”
“Okay, thanks you three!” Ryoko says cheerfully as all us kids (besides Marianne and the now being lightly scolded Markus) leave the Demon Queen’s room and split up-
“Um… Raquel,” Yuna asks our ‘big sis’ nervously making me and Ayra stop and wait, “I…. Can I sleep with you tonight please….?”
“Aww! Of course you can!,” Raquel agrees while giving her a hug and turning to us, “do you two want to as well?”
“Eh, why not.” Ayra agrees with an embarrassed blush and I nod as well as we follow her to her room and I can’t help but smile. Being down here is great, and I’ll do whatever I can to protect it.
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bellewintersroe · 2 years ago
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Love your work!! Was wondering if i can request a BoB ship if not thats ok!
I’ve got dirty blond hair and dark blue eyes. I’m really pale but cant tan as i get burnt. But love being out in the sun. I’m around 5’7. I can act innocent but im really not, I’ve got a bright personality but am a people pleaser, it’s a bad habit of mine. I love being stubborn but my parents hate it. Honestly im a bit lazy but love to bake. I prefer to dress girly, like dresses and skirts but i still love my ripped jeans and combat boots. I love spending time with my friends and am constantly seeing them. I always fly to my dads every holidays. I value respect, trust and honesty such as “stab my back and ill stab yours”. I love to visit QLD because im Aussie but i always ask if we can travel somewhere. I love opal hunting, ice skating and i can rollerblade really well. I’ve been a netballer for 6 years and im a libra
Thank you if you decide to do me!! <33
thank you so much for your request, you sound like such an interesting person!! <3
I ship you with… Joe Liebgott!
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First of all I think Joe would think you’re absolutely beautiful. Like an actual Angel with your blonde hair and blue eyes.
he’d for sure call you a ‘doll’ and if Barbie was released in the 1940’s he would 1000% nickname you Barbie doll.
But anyway, Joe would be the type that if you walked past he’d go ‘wowwwww’ and slap his buddy on the arm. (Probably wouldn’t tell them about his crush on you at first because he doesn’t like competition as confident as he may try to act).
maybe you’d get into a conversation about being sunburnt? Like you, Joe doesn’t tan very well, he usually just burns, so it’s a good conversation starter, he’d probably tease you that you were blushing over him, but in reality your cheeks are just sunburnt!
overtime I think you’d persuade him to take care of his skin in the sun, and give him sun burn to take care of him. He’s in complete awe, and isn’t afraid to call you his girl super early on.
your bright personality mixed with your beauty is astonishing for Joe- he doesn’t want to wait to call you his and he falls extremely hard and fast for you.
Maybe if he’s only used to seeing you in more comfortable clothes, he’s blown away to see you so girly!!! He adores that you love to dress up, and he probably can’t keep his hands off you, waist, hands, hips, butt, boobs- he loveeeeeesssss your boobs.
very respectful at first, won’t lay a finger on you unless you make it clear to him/ ask him to.
This might be a little confusing at first? Bcs he’s saying all these lovely things to you, but he seems nervous to hold your hand?!
When he honestly opens up about being a little nervous on one of your early dates, it’s a huge green flag and I think he recognises how much you value honesty.
might go a little too far with the honesty and call you a people pleaser, it can be a bit upsetting, but Joe just wants the best for you and hates himself after something slips out of his mouth wrong.
After the war, Joe is keen to settle down with you and start a family- he never considered the prospect of travelling before?! Seeing so many parts of Europe during the war put him off for a little while, but I think with some persuasion you can start to show him the good in the world again.
He’d beg you for babies.
accidentally would stare at your boobs and your friends might notice this oops- but he makes really good friends with your friends. As you do with his friends, which I think would be super important for the two of you.
if you think you’re stubborn then you’ve got a whole new thing coming with Joseph Liebgott. He’s the KING of stubbornness. But just flash him some puppy eyes or pout and you can easily get your way.
“Awww, kid, don’t look at me like that, you know I can’t say no…”
As a libra it’s stated you can ‘smooth out the peace’ which I think is very fitting to say you’d be in a relationship with Liebgott.
Super fun and romantic relationship, I think he’d enjoy anything with you, whether that be walking around or just lounging in bed together. I think he needs a lot of quality time with you, and that’s his love language.
finds your accent so sexy, probably forgets to listen because he’s that taken away with how hot you are.
would flirt sooooo fucking good with you, especially once he’s had a couple to drink, he’s got you wrapped around his little finger when he’s being a flirtatious little devil.
needs cuddles and reassurance when he’s feeling down. Either that or it comes out as frustration, but he loves you so dearly he hates taking things out on you, so I think he’s super careful and doesn’t do this a whole lot.
loves you dearly and he’s super protective over you, but not in an overbearing way.
Probably tries to come ice skating once or twice- bur he prefers to watch with a soft smirk on his face about how proud he is that he got with you.
Can’t skate, nonono, it would be hilarious to watch- like Bambi on ice.
but yeah, a genuinely fun relationship, there’s a lot of respect and understanding of each others boundaries; and I think your personalities would make way for a super genuine and enjoyable relationship.
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the-void-writes · 2 years ago
Note
• there's no heroes or villians in this place
I can't thank you enough for all the prompts 💖 They're helping me get a better idea of where to take this thing. With that said, here's a short and somber piece with Jason's patients because the idea really fit for them (even if my dialogue's clunky lol)
Freaks of Preston - Heroes and Villains
The patients of Division 6 always looked forward to their free day. None of the soldiers were there to instruct them, there was no schoolwork to do, and no scientists were around to collect samples or do tests. It was just the children, and sometimes their caretakers if they weren’t busy. They trusted their caretakers more than anyone else in the building— Jason, especially.
Since everyone else was stuck in a meeting, the kids decided to hang out in their training room. Granted, Jin was the only one training, while the others rested around her. Colin was using his free time to study an old cookbook that Julie had gotten for him, making a list of ingredients that Jason could hopefully find for him. Sarah drew in her sketchbook, and even though her face was hidden behind her thick coils, everyone knew her eyes were fixated on Jin. Riley sat on a nearby bench with his knees tucked to his chest, sharing an earbud with Thomas as they played music beside him.
Kevin laid across the table Colin was sitting at, taking up every last bit of space. The overhead lights made his goggles look like the headlights of a car. He was abnormally quiet, his friends noticed. Usually, he loved to joke or tease or gossip about one of the other divisions, but he had been silent all day. Colin poked his cheek.
“Feeling alright?”
Kevin smiled up at him. He had the grin of a crocodile, and if his eyes weren’t so sensitive to light, he would probably have the stare of one.
“Peachy, Cee,” he said. “I’m just thinking.”
“Oh shit,” Riley said, “someone call the news. Blondie knows how to think.”
Kevin stretched his arm across the room and yanked Riley’s ear. Riley stood up, sparks charging between his fingers, but Thomas pulled him back onto the bench.
“What were you thinking?” Thomas asked.
“I don’t think I should say it. Your little terrier might make fun of me.”
This time, Thomas had to push Riley against the bench to keep him from running. Jin leaned against the weight machine and caught her breath, stretching out the right stump of her arm.
“We won’t make fun of you,” she said, “and I’ll make sure Riley doesn’t, either.”
Colin closed his textbook and straightened his glasses. “Go ahead, man. Shoot.”
Kevin’s grin softened, reminding them all of the shy boy who had first arrived at their division. His question was quiet, like he was afraid someone else would hear him.
“Are we the bad guys?”
Everyone sat silently, even Riley. They never wanted to consider it, not after they had already been saved from their own horrible homes. Nothing could have been worse than their parents, in their eyes, though they still shared the unspoken fear that they had walked out of a lion’s den and into the mouth of a larger beast. Sarah tried to smile, hoping to comfort her friends— and herself.
“No, honey, I don’t think so. You may laugh like a supervillain, but you’re too nice to be one.”
She was expecting him to prove her right, letting out his traditional loud and infectious laugh, but he barely mustered a chuckle. The others could tell from his shaking hands that his anxiety was spiking again. It hadn’t been as bad as his first few nights, but when he was frightened, it shook him up terribly. Sarah stood up and squeezed his hand.
“Kev, talk to us.”
He sat up, swinging his short legs over the table’s edge. “It just doesn’t make sense otherwise. This place is a villain’s wonderland. There are weapons in this building that I’ve never seen anywhere online.”
“Is that something you look for often?” Riley asked, before he was hushed by Jin.
“And what guy with a million-dollar military facility just shows up at a broken home and takes in the children for free? And the training, and the army of Freak-soldiers? What’s it all for if we’re not the villains?”
“Maybe we’re the heroes,” Thomas said.
“Heroes being led by a walking corpse? Yeah, can’t wait to buy that action figure.”
“Well, what do you want, then?” Riley asked. “What answer is gonna satisfy you?”
Kevin lowered his head and stuck his hand under his goggles, wincing as he wiped something away.
“I just want to make sure that I didn’t leave a monster for another monster.”
Sarah brought his head to her shoulder. “Oh, Kev…”
He hugged her back, laughing to himself. “I know it sounds stupid, but— I don’t want my mom to be right. I don’t want to be a monster.”
“You’re not.”
The soft, low voice belonged to Jason. He joined his patients by the table, leaning against his cane as tears shimmered in his icy eyes. The children made room so he could sit. They always listened intently when their caretaker spoke, even when his words were too quiet to hear.
“What are we, then?” Kevin asked. “I don’t feel like a hero.”
Jason closed his eyes. “There are no heroes, dear— or villains, for that matter.”
“But our powers—”
“They’re real, yes, but heroes and villains are just roles in stories— they’re a fantasy. Your mother wasn’t a fantasy, Kevin, none of your parents were.” His voice got caught in his throat. “Neither was the man who killed my son.”
The children nodded in sympathy, taking his hands to hold until he could finally open his eyes again.
“You all deserve so much better,” he said, “and I pray that we’re able to give you that.”
“You do,” Kevin said. “There may not be any heroes, but there’s you. If you’re here, then I trust this place.”
Jason smiled, and his children brought him in for a hug. As grateful as they were to him, they knew he was just as grateful in return. They were one big, unorganized family, and as long as they had each other, Kevin was sure things would be okay.
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consul-valerius · 2 years ago
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Hold My Hand & Tell Me I Did Good (1/2)
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She tells me I’m not in trouble, that I don’t have to be afraid, but she’s lying. It’s written all over her face: she does not trust me. She looks at me and sees my father’s face, hears his lies [...] She’s right, of course, but that doesn’t mean she’s a good person for being right all the damn time.  
Rating: T+
W/C: 3390
Characters present: Damien, Donna, Imee (wow! what an intro for her this is!), Valerius & Nadia (with some references to Sam too lol)
Content warnings: references to abuse/childhood kidnapping; negative self-talk; general disturbing narration/ discussions of trauma + memory loss associated with the trauma; really shit psychology + depictions of hypnosis lol; Damien is Not Nice to Nadia
A/N: long time no fic lmfaoo I had the urge to explore more of when Damien initially first came home, and it's been a sec since I've written anything in the first person so thus.... this was born lol This chapter is is primarily exposition + usual family drama w/ more of Damien's personal insight/paranoia lmao
Mama and Papa have something planned for me. No, that’s not right. Countess Nadia has something planned for me, and she has convinced my parents into doing it. That’s all she’s done since I’ve gotten home: trick them into tricking me into doing some shoddy attempt at an interrogation. She tells me I’m not in trouble, that I don’t have to be afraid, but she’s lying. 
It’s written all over her face: she does not trust me. She looks at me and sees my father’s face, hears his lies. 
It’s annoying that she sees right through me, though. Is she not human? How could her first reaction to me being alive be to rule out if I somehow had something to do with my own disappearance? She’s right, of course, but that doesn’t mean she’s a good person for being right all the damn time. 
“This won’t be long,” Papa lies, his attention focused out the window. He hates this as much as I hate it, but he isn’t allowed to show it. He’s never allowed to show that he disagrees with Nadia—not since the last time. Mama is holding my hand, their knee rubbing against Papa’s. Comforting both of her boys; it’s overwhelming how much they extend themself to calm us down. They deserve better than the two of us, and yet they’re stuck with us. It makes me so damn sad all the time. “We can have tea when we’re finished up here. Or perhaps you’d like to go to the Heart District?” Papa continues, his voice hopeful. 
“The last time we did this, I couldn’t speak for three whole days.”
I’m being cruel, and I cannot stop myself. Mama’s hand tightens around mine.
“We won’t let it get that bad,” they say, their tone soft yet resolute. I can almost believe them—they are much better at lying than Papa. They believe their lies. “The moment you want out, we leave.”
“Is… Naima there?”
The last time she was there, I wanted to die. I still want to die just thinking of it. 
“No. She’s with Julian at the clinic,” Papa interjects quickly, happy to give me some sort of good news. Mama smiles at him and then at me, hoping I return it. I don’t; I slump further into my seat. 
“It’ll just be us and the Countess then?”
“Well… one more person will be there,” Mama finally admits; I knew they were hiding something. They’ve been on edge all day. “A family friend. You definitely don’t remember her—she only saw you at your baek-il.”
“Oh her! Of course, I remember her!” I finally smile, and I can feel the relief ooze off of them both. Mama nudges my side as I catch Papa rolling his eyes, still looking out the window with a smile on his face. 
“So fresh,” Mama teases; I keep their hand on my lap, clinging to it and playing with their fingers. “Her name is Imelda. I’ve known her forever; she’s very doting.”
That isn’t that comforting. I don’t really like Mama’s friends. Or Papa’s either, for that matter. They’re all creeps. 
“Why bring in someone new?” I ask, my tone still scathing even though I don’t want it to be. I’m so tired of making my parents sad, and yet that’s all I can really do these days. “I don’t have anything else to say. I’m not lying.”
“No one said you are lying, Damien.”
Papa sounds hurt saying it, and I want to cry. I didn’t say he thought I was lying.
“Then why are we doing this again?”
“Dia wants to ensure that—”
“The Countess has gotten all the information she will get from me!” I cut Mama off before they can defend that woman. Always defending her—it makes me so mad, I could spit. They have no idea how she looks at me, how she’s always looked at me. When they talk, I hear her voice. It drives me mad. “I don’t have any more to give her! Why won’t you just accept that what happened… is over? No one is coming back for me. I’ve taken care of it.”
I feel bitter, hot tears pooling already and I want to die even more now. Ever since I’ve come home, all I do is cry. It’s like I’m making up for the lost time. Papa makes a noise involuntarily—he’s an angry crier too. Mama is the only one managing to keep a brave face. This is life now, I guess. Her two boys stomping their feet and sobbing and pulling their hair out and spilling wine everywhere while Mama takes in deep, meditative breaths to calm themself down. 
“Damien, I know how hard it is to not know the full picture,” they say as they gently coax me to at least look at their hands. They never make me look in their eyes—they never did, even when I was a child and everyone would scream at me to look at them properly. Mama and Papa never did though. I look at Mama’s hands and relax my shoulders and jaw. “I know that you don’t want them right now. I know that you think you don’t need them. But believe me, mijo, you will want them. Even if it’s scary and painful—you will want them. And it gets harder and harder to get them back the longer you wait.”
Gods damn them. How dare they pull the “I was dead and now I’m not” card on me. They are just as manipulative as Papa and Nadia combined. I love them so much, it makes me sick. 
“But… I really don’t remember—”
“I know, mi vida, I know. But this will help you—it’s different than the last time. We’re going to try something new and a little wonky. You may hate it at first. I certainly hated it at first—”
“You’ve done it before?”
“Yes. With Tita Imelda, too. But it’s helpful—I think she can really help you.”
At this, I have no rebuttal. How can I refuse when they’ve done it already? A master manipulator. I flinch as Papa places a hand on my shoulder. Once I recognize his hand, I lean closer to him until he is resting his head on mine. 
“You’re so brave, Damien,” he whispers, his tone wet. He’s crying a lot now. I realize I’m also crying. What a bunch of babies we are. “And after today, you won’t have to be this brave anymore.”
“It’s exhausting… I hate having to do this. I just… Want to be a family.”
Neither of them has anything else to say other than, “I know.”
I want to slap Nadia as soon as I see her. Mama and Papa have more or less gathered themselves; Papa’s eyes are less puffy, but it’s obvious Nadia can tell we’ve all been crying already. She is obviously sad to see this, but I can see that she is also annoyed at us too. Weak. We are a weak family, not like hers. 
She instantly embraces Mama first—it’s clear who her favorite of the bunch is. 
“Thank you all for coming,” she says in that stupid, relaxed, in-control voice. She embraces my father next; it is shorter than when she embraced my mother. “I have tea set up in the drawing room.”
She moves closer as if to hug me next, but when I only glare at her, she backs off. Instead, she places her hand between my shoulders and gently leads the way. I can smell lavender, jasmine, and honey on her. I hate that she always smells so good. I hate how comforting she can be. 
“Thank you for having us,” I say very politely. “What experiment are you doing on me today?”
At this, she laughs because I didn’t use my mean voice, I used my sarcastic voice, and I know she likes it. It reminds her of my father, and most people enjoy that. They like it when we are sassy but not mean, cruel and petty to others but not to them. 
“Not an experiment, no,” she replies as Mama and Papa trail behind us. They always get so quiet during these interrogations; neither wants to speak out against Nadia, but I can tell they want to. “I will allow our guest to explain our plans for the day.”
I am introduced to an ancient woman. Okay, not ancient, but she’s old, older than Nadia by at least ten years. Her skin is a dark sandy color, her nose is wide, and she has thick, pin-straight black hair. She has very kind eyes, though she also looks a bit wicked depending on how she angles her face. She reminds me a bit of my grandma—Papa’s eomma—though she looks a bit more fun than her. 
“Look at that!” Her voice is very wheezy—a smoker. A lifetime smoker at that. My eyes are glued to the leather collar around her throat; it has pearl embellishments and lace on it, and dangling below her throat is definitely a vial of blood. 
All of Mama’s friends are creeps. 
“Please don’t say I look just like my father.” I say it without thinking, and I can tell without looking at him that Papa is mortified. Tita Imelda—I mean, this has to be her—only laughs at me. I didn’t think I was being funny, but it’s better that she laughs and does not get upset.
“And you sound like him too,” she sighs, moving with her walker to get closer to me. She has massive, cat-eye glasses on, her dark brown eyes cartoonish with them on. I hate that I am instantly endeared to this woman. I blame my grandmother. Old people make me cry—I want them to like me so damn bad. “Stars, you were a little potato the last time I saw you.”
“I’m a much bigger potato now.”
“Bigger than your mother, anyway.”
“Hey! Only a little bigger, you hag!” Mama finally steps in, though their voice is playful and full of love. Oh. Imelda is one of those friends. The two embrace and I can tell that Imelda is trying to will some sort of magic, old woman strength into Mama. I could use some of that, too. 
“I take it your parents have told you who I am, then?”
“Tita Imelda?”
“Pssh, call me Imee!” Imee pinches my Mama’s hip, and Papa laughs at that. “So formal. Imelda. Bah!”
We all get situated at a table as a servant pours us all tea. It’s some sort of lavender tea—something to soothe my nerves, most likely. Nadia thinks of everything. The adults dictate the conversation for a little while. No one wants to start a bad conversation just yet. They want to enjoy each other’s company and ignore the severely damaged adult-sized child in the room. I can gather from the conversation that Imee is tied to Old Man Sam—judging by that collar, I assume he owns her or something. Thankfully that old fuck isn’t here for this. I wouldn’t be able to handle it if he was here. Creep. Imelda is much better than him. Still a creep, but a better creep. 
“I suppose it’s time I begin my speech now, though.”
I am so lost in my own thoughts, I didn’t catch that the conversation has turned back to me. Damn it. Imee is looking at me very pointedly, and I gulp more tea. 
“Yes?” I prod, tilting my head towards her. Maybe if I’m mean enough, she will want to go home. “On with it then.”
She only laughs, though. She is used to this behavior. Old people are great at dealing with my behavior. 
“I’m not going to make any assumptions about what you know and don’t know about me,” she continues, knitting her hands together. Man, she has pretty hands for an old lady. “What I do know is that you’ve had it rough, kid. And when horrible things happen to someone, their body protects them.”
Why do I feel like crying?
“That’s what your head is doing—it’s protecting you. But you need help remembering—that’s why I’m here. You don’t need to protect yourself anymore. You’re safe with me—”
“Don’t spin this to make it seem like you’re helping me,” I bite back at her. Mama looks upset already; Papa looks like he wants to crawl into a hole and die. Nadia is stoic; she knows this verbal attack is meant for her. “You all want information so you can “catch the bad guys” who did this to me, so you can be the heroes of Vesuvia all over again.”
Imee only smiles sadly at me.
“That’s part of it, yes.” Thank the gods she isn’t lying to me. I would have walked out if she lied to me.  “But I have no real business in the affairs of this little city—I can care less about the things that go bump in the night here. What I care about is helping you feel whole. Do you want that, Damien?”
Damn it. This old broad is good. No wonder Old Man Sam owns her. My tongue is getting heavy; I think I’m about to cry.
“No one… asks me if I want this. How the hell should I know what I want?”
“Well, I am.”
Don’t talk to me like it’s only us in the room. They can all hear me; they’re all watching me. Always. 
“Why won’t anyone believe me?” I’m reaching a breaking point; I need to calm down. I am finally addressing Nadia properly. Her eyebrows twitch; she doesn’t like it when I confront her directly. “I told you that it’s taken care of. Do you want the bloody fucking details? Will that make you feel better if I tell you every little thing I did to get home?”
“Damien—!” I can’t tell what’s upset Papa more; the implication of my words, or the use of the word “fucking.” 
“No, let him speak,” Nadia interjects, standing. That’s right. Come over here and face me. 
“I don’t have any of those to give! I’m home! I fought my way home! There’s no way in hell those people will come back! I’ve taken care of it! I don’t need you, I saved myself!”
I know that Mama and Papa are crying. They can never hold it in when we talk about this. I know I’m being ugly right now, that the idea is ugly. They are probably picturing their sweet, precious little boy covered in blood, flesh and entrails dripping from his bared teeth. 
“Damien, we cannot be so sure unless we have the entire picture.”
Nadia is so cruel. I know she has always been cruel, but I see it so clearly now. I really hate her now. I hate her so much. 
“What if there is a detail you are missing? What if there are others out there who may want to come back?” She clamps her hand down on my shoulder before sinking down to get at eye level with me. Fuck you. Don’t fucking look at me. “Damien, I need to ensure your and my city’s safety. Do you understand that?”
“But I… I don’t have any missing details—”
“You say you cannot remember most of how you got home—”
“I don’t—”
“Those are missing details—” “That’s enough, Nadia!” 
I am stunned to hear my Mama’s voice. By the looks of it, Nadia is too. 
They are standing, their hair now a deep green color. Papa is staring off as if he is willing himself out of existence. I wish I could do the same. 
“Damien needs to be relaxed for this to work,” they continue, their tone still so harsh. “It doesn’t matter the reasoning as to why Damien wants his memories back! He deserves to have the full picture when he is ready.”
“Donatello is right,” Imee adds, her tone calm. She gives Mama a look; Mama sits immediately. I can tell that Nadia has grown cold over the entire exchange. She squeezes my shoulder one final time before taking her seat again, not looking at anyone. “This will only work if Damien wishes to do it. Lofty ideas like the ‘greater good’ will get us nowhere.”
Nadia’s jaw is tense now, her teeth gnashed together. Good. Stay quiet. I look back to Imee, my heart pounding. 
“What is this then? Why are you all talking in riddles?”
Imee sighs, rolling her shoulders. I hear a faint pop when she does. 
“Hypnosis has many uses,” she finally explains, keeping my attention only on her. Her deep, husky voice is captivating. Must be a damn good hypnotist. Gods, I hate this all so much. Mama was right. “Some can be fun. Some can be serious. It all depends on the people and why they are doing it.”
“This sounds like bull shit.”
“It is a little bull shit, I need to admit,” Imee laughs, waving Papa’s worries away. I am being so rude and it is killing him. “But it also helps. Tell me, Damien, have you ever been so engrossed in something that time seems to just… slip away? All that you can focus on is what you’re doing and getting it done?”
“I… yeah. Sure.”
“That’s a little taste of hypnosis. We’re going to get you relaxed and your mind open so you can only focus on one specific memory. That’s all. We don’t even need to focus on the day you came home—it can be any memory.”
I know that pissed Nadia off. She doesn’t want any memory, she wants her answers her way. 
“Is it… a spell?”
“The way that I practice, we use just a little bit of magic to help really open up your mind. Others don’t need it, they can just use an object and their words. But I’m clearly more special than other people.”
At this, I can’t help but giggle. Fuck her. 
“So… what? You put me in some sort of trance and I just… talk?”
“Yes, exactly!”
The idea that I may speak without thinking fills me with an ice-cold fear. That doesn’t sound good at all. I feel a shiver run up my spine; I swipe at the back of my neck, feeling as if some sort of bug is crawling on my skin. When I look down at my gloved hand, nothing is there.
“Damien?”
“I… Will I have any control?”
“You always have control, yes,” Imee leans closer to me, offering her hands. I only look at them as I hold her. Her hands are so soft and so smooth. “Think of me as a guide. I will keep you grounded here during the session, and the moment you don’t want to do this anymore, I will pull you back.”
“How will I know? Like… Do I just say it and it ends?”
“Yes, exactly right. It will be a lot of talking, a lot of meditating, and a lot of focusing. The moment you’re done, we finish. You go home. You live your life. If you think it’s helpful, we can try it again. If you think, ‘To hell with this crazy broad!’ then that’s that!”
I smile at that, too. Is she a mind reader and a hypnotist? 
“Believe me, you aren’t the only one to say that either.” She winks at me before giving my hands one final squeeze. She leans back in her seat, looking at me expectantly. I realize that everyone is looking at me, waiting for an answer. 
Swallowing, I clench my fists. This can go so wrong so quickly. One wrong move, one simple misspoken word, and everything I have ever worked for will collapse right under my feet. More than that, I will upset them. I think I may faint just at the thought. I can already feel my skin peeling at the thought of failing them—what good is a doll if it is broken? If it doesn’t make its owner happy?
“Fine. I will do this just to be done with this.”
But I know that Nadia will not back down. If I don’t do this, she’ll think of some other inane idea to get me to talk. This is a test. This is a test, and I will pass this test. Like I always do.
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waitimcomingtoo · 2 years ago
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hi! i saw that you give some advice on your ask? i’m not really sure who to talk to rn so i hope it’s okay to pop onto your ask like this :’) sorry to dump all of this on you. you don’t have to read or respond to this if you don’t feel like it! i know these things must take some energy too. i hope you’re having a wonderful time. happy new year! <3
so i may be looking for some reassurance rn? bc i just feel quite scared and anxious about the new year. it’s really bc i’ll be moving to a whole new area away from my parents for college since i’ll (finally) be attending in-person classes. the area is quite... it’s very intimidating, sorts of crime happen but i have no choice since that’s where my college is and i do live quite far as well. it’ll be a really huge adjustment for me, especially considering the fact that i am also heavily introverted and i haven’t really made any college friends as well through online classes, so i really don’t know anyone. i’m also expecting a lot of different personalities when i meet new people. i just feel very intimidated. anxious. i’m not as excited as i was last year during the new years, i’m really expecting so many difficulties this year and i’m scared. i’m scared i’ll be traumatized at some point and go back into the depressive state i was in before, again. i want to be happy and invincible but i’m afraid this year won’t be good to me because of all this. i’m not sure how i can calm myself down, i’ve tried my usual ways but i just keep coming back to this. would love and appreciate your thoughts on this, if you have the time. thank you so much <3
oh and btw, you’re one of my favorite writers. it’s always so exciting to see new updates from you. i absolutely love your works and i definitely can’t wait to see what you have in store for this year :) i appreciate you, thank you.
You have a lot of valid feelings and it’s totally normal to feel anxious before a big change. But don’t convince yourself that you won’t make friends or will be traumatized or have a bad time. If you tell yourself these things before you get there, they will come true. You won’t know what it’s like or what sort of people you will meet until you get there. And you’re definitely not the only one feeling the way you’re feeling. I would go in with 0 expectations and just learn the ways of your college for yourself. I promise college isn’t as scary and daunting as it seems. It’s a lot of big changes but most of the changes are really good. Just always remember that whatever happens is meant to happy and will eventually lead you in the right direction.
I also lived in a city when I was in college and had to walk 40 minutes from my apartment to campus, sometimes in the dark. It’s gonna be sketchy at night no matter where you are so here are some safety tips I used
Avoid walking anywhere alone if you can. If you have no one to walk with, catch up to strangers who are walking the same direction and walk close to them. It’ll look like you’re in the group or at least reassure you that you’re not alone
If you’re walking and totally alone, pretend you’re on the phone. I would usually pretend I was talking to my boyfriend or dad and loudly tell him I was on my home to him so anyone e listening knows there is someone in expecting me home
I would also mention something about the fake boyfriend/dad being a cop if I had to walk past a group of men
If you have keys, put them between your fingers like wolverine so if you have to punch someone, it’ll hurt more
I had a rape whistle on my keychain as well as mace on me at ALL times. I kept them in an easily accessible place so I could use them as soon as I need them
Keep your head down when walking past strangers bc making eye contact with them usually invites a conversation
If someone tries to stop you to talk to you, don’t stop. Keep walking. You can answer them but say you’re late and have to go
If you order food to where you live, call inside “foods here” so the delivery person doesn’t think you’re alone
I hope this helps. Good luck!! 💗💗
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flamedoesart · 2 years ago
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Ya know I’ve seen a lot of posts about parenting so I’m gonna throw in a rant into the mix.
Far too many parents don’t treat children like people.
Several parents fall into one of two categories, and sometimes it’s a mix.
The first category is that they treat their children like a social experiment. This can be for plenty of reasons, usually being either they want their child to be exactly like them, or they want their child to be exactly as they want. Now I have to be clear, when I say “exactly as they want” I very much mean the negative side to this*, a child who is shoved into the pure obedience role out of fear they’ll be abused. This child likely is afraid to experiment with their identity, out of fear of being neglected or rejected. This child likely won’t express much of their interests to their parents out of fear they won’t listen, will call the interest “stupid”, etc. This child eventually will learn to keep a million secrets from their parents and be extremely careful about what their parents know.
Those types of parents, in my opinion, come with the belief that if they just combine a million different factors than their child will be Perfect. Say for example, the parents are homophobic : if they either never tell their children that gay people exist, or they tell their child that being gay is just a phase brought about by being a hormonal teen, then surely their child will never be gay themselves, right?
The second type of parent is the less complicated one. The one that loves babies and toddlers, but not children and teens. They will coo and Aww at the little ones before they become old enough to go to school, but when they start going to school and interacting with others their age and forming their own opinions and beliefs, then the parent wants nothing to do with them anymore. This type of parent tends to (but not always) continuously have more children just so that they can relive the honeymoon period of when their child was solely dependent on them. This results in the older children feeling neglected, and possibly hating their younger siblings because they are receiving the attention the older ones no longer get.
My point in this is that, again, too many parents don’t treat children like people.
Children are far more than an end goal.
Children are their own people with their own minds and hearts and beliefs and ideas. Children should be given rules and guided, of course, they are new to this world and need to learn what’s okay and what isn’t. But to act like if you try hard enough they’ll be a perfect little robot who does everything you want? No. That’s not okay.
Children are far, far too often brought into this world for selfish reasons and things need to change about that.
*”Exactly as the parent wants” is a subjective phrase, and thus what I mean by the “ positive side” to this is that the parent is authoritative (or gentle) and wants their child to grow up kind and good and everything, but doesn’t use unkind means to get them there. They are fair to their children and don’t desire perfection from their children.
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