#And I think that during that time Agent developed a sense for when things just felt “wrong” with Victim

[illmoraineakoi]

So how many times do you think Victim tried to commit suicide after Mitsi's death, but never actually got very far because of the fear of potentially waking up back on the PC?

And how many times do you think he was so far beyond caring that he actually did try?

And how many times do you think Agent found him before it was too late?

IMO, all three are a non-zero number.

[haine-kleine]

after sitting with my thoughts about the epilogue for some time, I think the thing that broke the story had started right after Dabi's dance. said thing is LOV' utterly out of character treatment of each other and Shigaraki specifically.

them just standing there and passively observing the scene makes absolutely zero sense, if you use anything from their previously established relationships within the organisation for reference. especially with All for One's creepy comments. Spinner even points out shortly before this chapter that AFO!Shigaraki seems nothing like his normal self and this person is not the one he had chosen to follow.

and yes, Spinner does approach screaming Shigaraki and tries to help him, and his concern later leads him to seeing Shigaraki's mutated form in the cave, and on its own this development for Spinner is in line with his character and all around fine. pretty reminiscent of Toga and Twice, too.

(except Spinner is not allowed to really help Shigaraki in any way, unlike Toga was allowed to help Twice, and this entire thing between Shigaraki and Spinner only ends with Spinner's regrets and survivor's guilt instead of anything good or meaningful that isn't meaningless angst porn)

it isn't Spinner approaching Shigaraki that is the issue, it's the other's complete lack of action or even reaction besides appearing mildly disturbed. this is simply out of character for all of them, just judging by Twice's example who had similar breakdowns and wasn't plainly ignored by the others until his fit stops. this reaction makes even less sense, when you take into account the current state of the League. Twice had just been murdered by Hawks, the double agent who had infiltrated the League via Dabi, and Mister Compress had just sacrificed himself to give the League a chance for escape, and was sent to Tartarus immediately after his condition was no longer life threatening. Kurogiri is also being held captive by the heroes. there are only four of them left, with two dead and two captured. and none of them even mention the dead or the captured outside of the context of Kurogiri and his quirk.

this straight out makes no sense if you look back to the Overhaul arc and remember how far Shigaraki and the rest of them were willing to go to avenge Magne's death and Mr Compress' destroyed arm. this was important.

the event had motivated Shigaraki to be a better leader, because he had realized these people depend on him, and he won't let them be hurt under his protection. it had started the seed of self-doubt in Jin which would eventually grow to the desperation that allowed him to overcome the mental block against his quirk in the MVA arc, because he wanted to do everything he possibly could to help the League. it allowed him to make his clones despite the crippling trauma, because he saw Toga's hurt, bleeding body, and he didn't want her to die.

even fucking Giran, a broker whose very profession requires him to care about himself and his own well-being first and foremost, had sacrificed all of his fingers to prevent Redestro from getting his hands on the League. because he wants to protect them, to save them. and then we never actually see his mutilated hands or hear anything from him ever again.

and when Twice actually dies? all we get in response to that are two upset faces from Dabi and Toga's fury. that's it.

i really want to stress how out of character this barely-present reaction is, because Magne's example is right there and when Overhaul had killed her, the League knew each other for no longer than a month. this League has been together for at least half a year, had been through thick and thin together, had spent months on the run, homeless, having no one but each other to rely on, has defeated the Meta Liberation Army, quite literally, with the power of their friendship. they all cared enough about each other and Shigaraki specifically to stay with him during those months they had to fight Gigantomachia with barely any breaks for rest, still homeless, barely scraping by. it was imperative that they all survive through this together, especially for Shigaraki, who had went on this quest of getting stronger at least partly so that he would become a more reliable protector for the League. and when Twice falls victim to the hero who had murdered him in cold blood, because no one except for Dabi was there to save him, Shigaraki doesn't even get to react to Twice's death, and possibly never even learns about the fact.

on topic of Dabi, his reaction being exactly two frames of sad expressions and including the footage of Twice's murder into his broadcast, and ending immediately after that, also makes no sense. Dabi is someone who holds himself accountable and despite his declarations, cares about the League, it's the very reason he was keeping Hawks from the League and sprinted to Twice as soon as he realized Hawks' intentions with him, to protect him. Dabi's unsuccessful attempt to save Twice is another iteration of Overhaul, a combination of Shigaraki and Twice's roles in the tragedy. but unlike Shigaraki, who had steeled himself into taking care of his subordinates and becoming a responsible and strong leader, or Twice who had never forgotten about his role in the incident, Dabi just somehow forgets about the entire thing as soon as the first war is over. Toga is the one whom the narrative allows to actively react to Twice's death and express her grief. it makes sense that her reaction would be the strongest, as she was the closest with Twice, but why are two LOV members no longer allowed to care about the same incident at the same time? why aren't they allowed to protect each other anymore, when Giran, who is not even in the League, had made that sacrifice for them?

These are pretty small things, but it's these instances of Toga and Dabi preventing Machia from being injected with the sedative, protecting the League that are sorely missing in the second war.

and the biggest act of devotion and protection to the League, which was the last time we saw anything like this for them, Mister Compress' last moments with the League.

Mutilating his own body just to buy them five seconds to possibly escape. Because he loved the League, because he wanted all of them to be happy and achieve their dreams, to be free, and to live.

and in return for the favour, not only do they not come back for him like they did for Kurogiri (because his quirk is important for the plot, while Compress' isn't), but none of them mention Compress ever again. same with Twice (with the exception of Toga), same with Magne. from this point onwards, none of them are allowed by the plot to even care about the League of Villains. the interpersonal relationships between two individuals still shine through, occasionally, like Spinner's devotion to Shigaraki (and him alone), Dabi and Toga's pyromaniac trauma lane visit to her house and him giving her Twice's blood, Kurogiri reaching out to Shigaraki in the very end. but what about the League? ahd what about the dead members of the League, or Mister Compress?

somehow, at the point of the final war it boils down to the generalized conflict of heroes vs villains and the morality gymnastics involved in the concept. on its own, this would have been an okay development, if the examples the story was using to prove its point weren't people who had become very close friends and who had lost four people to this war against the heroes.

if the individual conflicts, like Toga's desperation to be acknowledged as human being deserving of affection, Dabi's familial abuse trauma and Shigaraki's lifelong manipulation by All for One not giving him any chance to be saved at all, were the finishing line of the villains' story development, why join them within the League at all? LOV is a separate concept functioning as a collective uniting all these villains, giving them a place to belong and people who give a fuck whether they live or die. except not anymore, because for some reason after the first war this concept is scratched completely.

so why not make them mere acquaintances who sometimes collaborate to bother the heroes together, if the bond between them got in the way of the story and wasn't the point of the story? why prove the depth of their bond with the Overhaul and My Villain Academia arcs? why make Shigaraki develop relationships and a sense of responsibility for these people at all, if in the very end his desire to save these people is denied by the author himself?

the previous arcs have spent a great deal of effort establishing that the villains are human too. they have human feelings, human desires and human relationships. so why is it that in the final arc their ability to experience human emotions towards each other is turned on and off manually by the author? at the very end even the author stops pretending like anything happening to the villains is evaluated on the scale of human experiences (unlike the heroes, whose injuries and deaths are talked about and mourned in great detail) and Kurogiri and Shigaraki are wiped out like plot inconveniences rather than important and well written characters.

honestly? it's ironically meta that the story ended up proving the very point it has spent 400 chapters arguing against.

[youbutstupid]

What d’you think is the “best” trait the main bau team members have?

OH I love this question thank you so much. There’s a lot so bear with me

Hotch: his compassion for his team. He’s an extremely compassionate and empathetic leader, constantly allowing for his team to leave work if they need to and following them on their hunches, even if they seem unlikely, purely because he loves and respects each of them. Quite often Hotch is portrayed as stone faced but I’ve honestly never seen a male leading character be so openly loving to their team.

Gideon: how much he cares for the victims in his cases. Gideon is often characterised as being a bit clueless to the feelings of his team, yet he never is to the people he is trying to save because he puts his everything into it. He has always been so open and accepting in cases which was rare for a 51 year old man in 2005; he was very willing to let go of his old ways and what he used to know so that he could evolve with the changes in society in order to best help the people he was saving. We also got to see his book of the people he saved. It was amazing.

Rossi: his ability to read and help the people on the team when no one else does. I wholeheartedly believe that if Rossi was present during the Hankel case, Reid would not have gone through his addiction alone. Rossi is always the one to call out people who try to hide their problems and he puts in so much effort to help them, even using his hours outside of work to do so. We see him waking up early to help Hotch coach Jack’s football matches, him inviting Penelope over for scotch so that she can finally disconnect from technology and him hosting the cooking class, the wedding and Strauss’ funeral dinner ar his house. His character development from being weary about the team to adoring them all individually was amazing.

Reid: I love how despite him admitting that he has trouble with emotions, he is always the one doing everything he can to be an emotional support when people around him are struggling. We see him try and comfort Elle when everyone else disconnected from her, he stayed with Garcia the entire time when she was shot, he is the one to call Emily to ask if she wants to hang out when she started disconnecting due to the Doyle situation, he is the one to try and help JJ with her PTSD in season 10 and so on. He doesn’t like the idea of the people around him going through things alone despite the fact that he often tries to go through things alone and he is extremely selfless in this sense.

JJ: I am constantly inspired by how throughout the show, she is repeatedly putting in effort to try and improve herself as a person and as an agent. We never see her get cocky, even when she deserves to be like she was in the FBI from a very young age, she had one of the most challenging jobs as the press liaison and then she was able to work herself up to profiler where she was one of the most formidable people on the field. Despite how impressive she really is, the audience are never given a chance to consider it because she never boasts about it and instead spends everyday striving to be better.

Morgan: he is always willing to take on a leadership role when he has to, yet he is always willing to give it back to Hotch when he doesn’t need to take it on anymore. I’m not just referring to season 5 either, I’m talking about any time when Hotch is unable to take on his role. Morgan respects Hotch a lot and is always willing to support him by taking on the role of team leader when Hotch can’t anymore, yet he never tries to take the role permanently for himself, despite being told he could by Strauss. Despite his years of experience and his leadership skills, he is willing to give up the role because he sees it as what is best for the team and he respects Hotch too much to keep it.

Elle: her protection of women. Elle was, in my opinion, ahead of her time. She previously worked in the sex crimes division and in season 1, she was the only female profiler and she did not step away from her previous role as an advocate for women in sex crimes just so she could better ‘fit in with the men’ of the BAU; she instead brought her perspective with her and implemented it in her cases. She was the only one in episode 3 to look at the woman who was assaulted and realise how uncomfortable she must have been surrounded by men. She ended her career in the BAU fighting for women and it hurts me that the BAU lost her.

Garcia: she never, ever stops being herself, even when people question her or bring her down for it. Sadly, because Garcia is the brightest person in the room, she is quite often the one who the profilers take their frustrations out on; we have seen JJ, Morgan, Hotch, Rossi and Emily all do this. Despite this, she doesn’t waver, she doesn’t stop being the brightest person in the room just because someone is simply not in the mood for her to be because she knows that she does not need to apologise for simply existing as her authentic self. In the episode The Black Queen, 9x12, her ex tells her that they both used to make fun of girls like her, and she corrects him saying that he made fun of girls like her, this was who she always wanted to be. This is so empowering to me.

Prentiss: my love, she was so unbelievably loyal to those around her and this was clear from the beginning. She was the only one to question Reid’s suffering in season 2, she literally uprooted her life and faked her death so that her team’s lives could be protected in season 6. When she found out JJ was in danger in season 9, she was so quick to jump on a plane back to help her. When the team calls for favours whilst she is in London, she always answers to help them. When Reid got arrested and imprisoned in season 12, she didn’t once believe that he committed the crime of which he was accused and even risked her entire career tampering with possible evidence so that it couldn’t be used against him. She is loyal to a fault and so many don’t acknowledge that.

Todd: we only got Todd for 9 episodes but I loved how human she was. She was the first character to make the audience realise that none of what we were looking at was normal. By season 4, the audience became very desensitised to the crimes that we were looking at and Todd broke us out of that and she also was not afraid to call out the fact that it wasn’t normal that the profilers were desensitised either. I respect how in the end she would rather admit that she couldn’t do the job anymore than lose that human side of her. I also loved how she made sure Hotch never took JJ for granted.

Seaver: we never got to see much of Seaver’s development because of the writers, but I loved her willingness to learn. Seaver hadn’t even graduated from the academy when she joined the team, she was not a profiler, she wasn’t even a qualified FBI agent. Watching her learn and grow in such a traumatising field and take it all in her stride was so incredibly interesting to watch. I also loved watching her friendship grow with the team; going to the cinema with Reid, Morgan and Garcia, gaming night with Rossi and going out for curry with Reid. 

Blake: Blake was so incredibly talented and so unbelievably smart but instead of using it as a way to get ahead of her team, she used it as a way to relate to them and bond with them. She almost became a protective figure over them and she took that role very seriously too. It was honestly amazing watching her mind work and how easily she was able to take on her role as a profiler because of it. I know I just named multiple good qualities but it is incredible to me how much her character was able to grow and be adored in just two seasons, she had no idea what dynamic she was getting into when she joined the team yet she fit in perfectly and adapted to it so quickly in order to help them and gain their trust.

Callahan: her confidence. She went into that bullpen being unapologetically herself from the beginning and she fit herself into that team without an ounce of apprehension. She made so much effort to establish herself and she was not shy about it which I adored; she had banter with Rossi, she opened up to Reid, she carpooled with JJ, she became a close friend for Garcia and she gained Morgan’s trust all within a few episodes; the last two being hard to do as a new member of the team. I love how she didn’t question where she belonged, she knew she belonged.

Simmons: to me, Simmons was just so incredibly sweet. When he first joined and I saw that he was buff and conventionally attractive, I was weary that he was just going to be another jock detective that we see in other shows, but he wasn’t. He, again, was an incredibly strong and skilled agent yet when he arrived on the team he took everyone for who they were and never once acted like he was in any way better than them because he had skills that they did not have. He was just a nice person and that may sound like a basic description but to me, it’s the best description to give a person. I felt genuinely safe with Matt’s character on the screen because it was just lovely to see a man on the screen who was just good.

Lewis: OH I love this woman. Tara brought a new element of self assurance to the screen and also humour. She, again, was very unapologetically herself and she knew her worth, as we saw when she went through her breakup, which was so refreshing to see because it is rare you see a woman know her value and not be portrayed as cocky for doing so. She is also a character that marked her place on the team and I also love how unafraid she was to come out and say that she was dating a woman, which was a risk in itself because the BAU had never had an openly LGBTQ+ profiler before. I also loved how she brought ‘your mum’ jokes to the show because watching a 50 year old woman with a doctorate make multiple ‘your mum’ jokes is all I needed from the show if I’m honest.

Alvez: I don’t want to repeat things too much but I also love Luke’s loyalty, which is something we also saw from very early on in his time in the show. Bear in mind when Reid was in prison, Luke was only on the team for a very short period of time, yet he believed wholeheartedly that Reid was innocent and even made threats for his safety. I also love how he took Garcia’s original dislike of him in his stride and honestly embraced everything about her, whether it was her distrust in him or her ‘quirkiness’ as the team would dub it, he took it all in and loved her because of it all, not in spite of it.

[windvexer]

Hello, it's the anon with alexithymia! And. huh. Everyone I've talked to before have basically agreed I'm naturally going to be real bad at the stuff. That witchcraft naturally requires you to be in tune with that kind of stuff and there's very little that I specifically could actually manage because of it. No one's suggested before that it's all unrelated. So thank you. I'm having one of those "have to reconsider everything I've ever been told and holy crap I've been making it way harder for myself than I had to this entire time" moments

I think if we sit down with the idea that "you must be in tune with emotions to practice witchcraft," and ponder it for even a second or two, we might realize that it doesn't make a lot of sense.

I mean bear with me for a second here, Anon. Let's say that I'm a very emotionally healthy neurotypical person, and I'm practicing witchcraft well for 10 years. I'm so good at it because I can tell when I'm angry versus just hungry.

But then I get into a car crash which was very scary for me, and it triggers some other long-term anxieties, and I've got to go on an antidepressant for a little while until things get sorted. And as a side-effect of this trauma and medication, I become disconnected from my feelings.

So... that's it? My spiritual and religious practice that's been my foundation for 10 years is gone when I need it the most, because I'm in a bad mental health place for several months? My gods and spirits aren't going to listen to me because I'm in a bad place? The spell that's worked 100 times is going to stop, because I can't compel myself to feel the right emotions during the casting, or receive emotional input during the casting?

That's a fairweather faith if I've ever heard one. Imagine your witchcraft not being there for you because you've got a lot of stuff going on and as a side-effect you've been cut off from your feelings.

I imagine maybe you've fallen in with some people who believe that "shadow work" and self-therapy are synonymous with witchcraft? Or, people who have genuinely not untangled the idea that feeling!emotions is separate from feeling!energies.

Like even regarding what you were saying in the last ask about feeling the vibes of the room and empathy. It's not like you have to be emotionally receptive and articulate to develop psychism where you can confidently conclude, "that person's aura is the color red and they will be agitated if I get too close to them." Sure, you can receive that information through emotion. Or you can receive it as colors and words. Etc.

Anyway, best of luck to you.

My advice: don't get too caught up in trying to sense/perceive external energies and inputs just at the beginning. This is somewhat akin to a writer sitting down to start their first novel at the cafe, and constantly pausing to figure out if someone walking down the street might be a literary agent.

[bananaactivity]

Might Med 3rd Season Over View

Just a look at my ideas for a fic that I could do... I never used to be interested in doing writing of shows left on cliff hangers but I got some sweet ideas so guess I'm doing this now...

Mighty Med AU: Frost-Burn “Kazimieras (Kaz) Jan Krakowski” 17-24 yrs old across MM Season 3 to Elite Force Hero Name: “Wild-Spark” Powers: Flight, Pyrokinesis, Calokinesis, Fire and Heat resistance, Enhanced Durability and senses Possible Uses of Powers: He could create heat waves or even generate intense localized heat fields to distort vision, Fire Breathing, Make weapons or tools superheated, use his fire powers to cauterize wounds and seal injuries, molten rivers or lava traps Weaknesses: Laziness, Less control of powers, more likely to injure others, can tend to overheat the area around him, good for Oli but bad for things that can't stand to overheat like his new bionic teammate's chips, This leads to Oliver having to cool his heat down or put out his fires Frost-Burn Team-Up Powers: Thermal Shockwaves: Kaz could heat an area to extreme levels, and Oliver follows up with cryokinesis, creating massive thermal shockwaves, Oliver could use water to conduct Kaz’s heat and focus it into targeted steam blasts, Cryoflare Spear Kaz ignites a massive fireball and launches it at a target, but at the last moment, Oliver steps in and freezes the fireball, encasing it in a hard, razor-sharp layer of ice,

“Oliver (Oli) Knox Himing” 18-25 yrs old across MM Season 3 to Elite Force Hero Name: “Frost-Flare” Powers: Flight, Super-strength, Hydrokinesis, Cryokinesis, Enhanced Durability (except to the cold) and senses, High Intelligence Possible Use of Powers: Instant Freezing, Ice Constructs, Control liquid water and turn it into dangerous jets of high-pressure water, Use his water control to heal others by conjuring cooling agents or soothing liquid around wounds, reducing inflammation or healing burns, Move huge objects, punch through walls, or pick up heavy things with ease, Ice Cloaking ( dangerous), artificial snowstorm, Weaknesses: Has EXTREMELY low resistance to the cold temperature of his powers, Gets cold much easier now, with a weakened immune system less circulation in his hands, and gets numb in his extremities often, this leads to Oliver having to rely on Kaz’s heat to stay warm especially during Hero Work Frost-Burn Team-Up Powers: Thermal Shockwaves: Kaz could heat an area to extreme levels, and Oliver follows up with cryokinesis, creating massive thermal shockwaves, Oliver could use water to conduct Kaz’s heat and focus it into targeted steam blasts, Cryoflare Spear Kaz ignites a massive fireball and launches it at a target, but at the last moment, Oliver steps in and freezes the fireball, encasing it in a hard, razor-sharp layer of ice,

“Skylar (Sky) of Caldera” 18-25 yrs old across MM Season 3 to Elite Force Hero Name: “Skylar Storm” Powers: None, She uses tech and weapons developed by Oliver and then Daven-tech alongside that, She does have Martial arts training, Gymnastic skills, and quick thinking, also her enhanced durability is intact, due to her Calderan Biology Possible Uses of Powers: She also uses a motorcycle along with her hand-to-hand combat skills Weaknesses: Lack of powers leads to some insecurity but she is a strong person, She gets angry and frustrated quickly, Kaz and Oliver's powers are hard to keep up with, and sometimes she struggles to hold her own when fighting with them and can't really do combo moves with them

Story Beats ( No real romance within the team because I just can't deal with that…little silly bully flirting with Chase and Kaz just for the lols but I can't do the romance thing) Third MM Season Oliver's mom has become the super-powered villain Mr. Terror. Kaz and Oliver have gotten their powers and are dealing with them. Over time they learn them and gain their superhero titles and suits. In the meantime, Skylar has had to come to terms with the fact that she won't be getting her powers back. She has to take injections once every six months with a special injection that Oliver managed to manufacture so that her cells won't try to explode her limbs. She decides to be all dark and mysterious with an invented Skylar Storm fit ( Mostly black, Pink accents) with a motorcycle. Oliver coincides and also makes her some weapons so that she has more protection than just “flips and kicks”. At this point, Mr. Terror has only been doing the bare minimum ( Oliver has been staying nights at the Hospital and had his dad) sent away but picks a major fight near Mighty Med. She made a bunch of Superpowered robo thingies and they wipe the floor with every Hero. Kaz, Oliver, and Skyar do a big team thing and take the robot things down. Mr. Terror makes it obvious her goal before total world domination is to get her son back under her. Oliver is not into it and they kick the rest of the Robo thingies' asses. That's when the super cool thing happens and Ambrose writes “ Frost-Burn” a duo comic between Wild-Spark and Frost-Flare with Skylar Storm too but it's mostly about those two as Skylar has a new comic out called: “Requiem for a Hero: Storm of Ashes” and its meant to be a gag where the other characters learn about some crazy vigilante thing that Skylar did in her downtime through that comic and they wonder how she had time to dismantle a crime ring while they were doing something else. “ Frost-Burn” is heavily edited because people know who Kaz and Oliver are in real life and neither of them can drop everything and get alter egos. So a big selling point of the comic is how not even the audience knows these heroes' real identities, Both comics are pretty popular, and it's a big boost to all of their egos. It's also silly because Jordan is suspicious because she notices some similarities between the Heros and her weird friends but Gus is just like not even listening half the time. Kaz and Oli do their whole new superhero thing but then they have this big ass fight with the Terror-Bots and they capture Oli right before he finished the device that can suck his mom's powers back out. That's when you get the Evil Oli thing. Oli gets mind-controlled cause his mom's tryna Stockholm him. His regular costume has ski goggles as a quirky little mask and his mom replaces those with a new pair that has the mind control stuff in it and he’s all foreboding and stuff. His Evil name is like Hailstorm or Frostwraith or something stupid that makes Kaz laugh when he hears it She kinda fucks up tho because Oli needs Kaz as he helps warm him due to his inability to withstand his own cold powers. So she can't fully take over the world as she’s gotta get Kaz. It’s this whole thing and during the final battle, Kaz manages to melt the goggles enough that they malfunction ( he gets stabbed with ice though. sadge) and Oli gets his mom's powers sucked with the device because of Kaz and CO. finished it. Oli has to carry Kaz to the hospital, he isn't allowed to perform the surgery on him but when he comes out they get all emotional and stuff. And then by that point they’ve already graduated and then they get “internships” from Davenport Industries along with Skyar with a free ride to Centium City…

Oooooh, what could that be about??

This thing is so interesting to me i gotta think about it more

[itmeblog]

WE ARE LIVE!

You can currently find The Unusual Courtship of Pax the Faerie on Amazon, Barnes and Noble and on my ko-fi! (In both EPUB and PDF)

And now I get to talk about it!

TL:DR This is how I wrote a novella with

Genderqueer faerie

A human who fae find attractive but not for the reasons you'd think

A couple that is endgame and a couple that is very much not not endgame based on two very different relationships with our titular character.

A deep and surprisingly thoughtful search for oneself and soul

A lot of religious references, just so many references

BDSM vibes

You can enjoy the madness with me. Below. Because this is not what I set out to write. I had intended to follow the standard romantasy script and determine if I wrote something that appealed to major markets if I'd manage to snag myself an agent. This is not what happened.

I wrote this book because I became fascinated by ACOTAR. It is imperative that I make it very, very clear, at the point that I started thinking about Pax, I had never read nor picked up anything written by Sarah J Maas. This story will make no sense if I did. I was only vaguely aware of her existence. I had heard some withCindy rants and then decided to get an overview from someone who genuinely enjoyed the book.

I went into this knowing it was a story about big, sexy, well-endowed men and a girl with perhaps too little fire power between her ears. It is also the book that I consider ground zero of the maleness ("he felt very male"? Girl what does this mean??) epidemic.

And I had questions.

If the fae are beautiful, sexy, and promiscuous then why have fated mates? Why make them stop being promiscuous? Wasn't that some of the fun?

If sex does not have the same weight in their society (presumably) then why is it saved only for romantic partners?

In a world where everyone can shapeshift why so much misogyny? If there is misogyny why do people not shapeshift or dress to pass as male in order to gain some modicum of protection?

Wouldn't it have had to develop in a completely different fashion than we're used too?

Why are the gendernorms so human?

Why would a faerie be interested (romantically and aesthetically) in a human?

So. Many. Straight. Faeries.

Why make the love interest the exception to the cruel nature of the fae when you can just make the human so much worse?

Angels???? ANGELS?????!!

NOTE: At this point I still had not picked up the book.

ALSO PROBABLY IMPORTANT: I am very aro.

Here's what I knew:

Horny

Faeries

Religion??

These are the rules I stuck to. So, while developing Pax, he was meant to be pretentious and very deeply wrong in her understanding of religion and the passages he quotes. I called a friend (from an old school Italian Catholic family, very old school) for some direction.

I explained the premise and she went, "no, you're not looking for passages, you're looking for the Ecstasy of St. Teresa"

This, my friend, is where things got out of hand.

This is the Ecstasy of St. Teresa

Considered one of the most risque statues of the Baroque period. Inspired by this

"I saw in his hand a long spear of gold, and at the iron's point there seemed to be a little fire. He appeared to me to be thrusting it at times into my heart, and to pierce my very entrails; when he drew it out, he seemed to draw them out also, and to leave me all on fire with a great love of God. The pain was so great, that it made me moan; and yet so surpassing was the sweetness of this excessive pain, that I could not wish to be rid of it. The soul is satisfied now with nothing less than God. The pain is not bodily, but spiritual; though the body has its share in it. It is a caressing of love so sweet which now takes place between the soul and God, that I pray God of His goodness to make him experience it who may think that I am lying" - St. Teresa of Avila

Needless to say I became obsessed, which is great because St Teresa of Avila was a fascinating woman who sat in Spain, a mecca of Abrahamic religions, during the Spanish Inquisition (there's a lot of overlap in beliefs here). And she wrote a lot.

NOTE: Very important, I had intended to write this as a sexy l'il romp with a slightly toxic pairing, k? Like Pax's infatuation was 110% meant to be a little tongue in cheek. I wanted this to be marketable, I wanted to maybe get published. Yeah? I went wrong immediately when I decided Pax would be genderfluid but shut up. It's fine. We're here, everything is queer, we are rapidly sinking into a mire of 500 year old esoteric religious subtext. You with me? Cool.

I read several dissertations on sensuality in religion as well as many many things about the unintentional yet constant eroticization of pain (it happens so much omg, I cannot look at crucifixes the same anymore). And the break down of St. Teresa of Avila's 7 mansions of the Interior Castle (which I've also read), which explains in detail how to find god within oneself. Some of these papers were 100s of pages long. The pile of research I did for this was honestly bigger than the phone books of my youth.

As I said, this got deeply out of hand.

It also became the foundation for Pax's personality and the lens through which he experiences the world. Note: the woman Pax falls in love with is very much not God, she is also very much not safe.

So now I have this very raunchy book about faeries, religion, and sex, and finally FINALLY only after I finished, did I attempt to read ACOTAR.

And I fucking overshot.

I overshot so, so, so far.

I was aiming for Mars and I've ended up on Pluto. When all you hear about a book is how explicit it is and how it's the fairy porn book you assume it's more than 2 scenes.

You assume a lot of things about those scenes and the responsiveness of the heroine. Tamlin if that was the best you've ever had... what pray tell was the point of making you fae?? Are none of your lovers responsive or could it be you're a pleasure dom? Please, little fae man who has wild spring orgies, speak to me. What is your story?

So now I have a novella with

Genderqueer faeries

A queer love interest

A human who fae find attractive but not for the reasons you'd think

A couple that is endgame and a couple that is very much not not endgame based on two very different relationships with our titular character.

Way too much sex

A deep and surprisingly thoughtful search for oneself and soul

A lot of religious references, just so many references

BDSM vibes

[indieyuugure]

so i’m indie tmnt.. about leo and karai.. how’s that work?

So in Indie TMNT, Leo and Karai are what you could call “a couple” and while in the beginning that’s much more of a correct term, they mellow out as more of a super fighting duo that enjoys each other’s company.

Leo is the first to notice Karai and develop a crush, though he knows that it’s weird and he’s very shy about it. He does nice things for her and will cover for her even when he shouldn’t.

Karai in the beginning doesn’t have any feelings about him, negative or positive, he’s just another guy Shredder rants about at dinner. The Shredder, however, sees the potential for getting close to the turtles via Leo’s crush and she and him concoct a plan to play Leo. Unfortunately though, Karai actually ends up liking him back. They have many common interests, she thinks he’s funny and they naturally get along very well. So then Karai is caught between a rock and a hard place having to play double agent for both Leo and the Shredder.

During the invasion, Karai’s loyalties are really put in jeopardy as the Shredder is giving her direct commands and Leo is standing right there. Though Leo ends up thinking she chose to side with the Shredder—which he accepts and respects since he would do the same for his father, though he’s still kinda heart broken—Karai actually saved his life. I won’t spoil how, but she does in her typical sly manner.

Afterwards they make up and explain what happened. As time goes on, Leo’s teen crush kind of mellows into more of a close friendship and same with Karai. They’re both aware that their relationship won’t go anywhere and they’re okay with that, so they both decide that their relationship will end up being more like a friendship than a romance.

I hope this makes any amount of sense. I’m basing their relationship off of a couple I know in real life so it feels more natural. I do this with all relationships I write, for instance, April & Casey and Raph & Mona are based off stories I’ve heard of my parents as teenagers/young adults.

I think this is the most delicate relationship of all to deal with since it has a very bad reputation—no thanks to 2012–and can often come off as weird. The objective of Indie TMNT is to recreate and master everything in the TMNT universe and consolidate it into one iteration.

I think I want something more similar to the 87 Leo and Lotus which is very cute(in my opinion). I think people often take these relationships too seriously and forget the fact that the turtles are 15-16. All of the “romantic” relationships in my tmnt are very pure hearted “hey, I like you being here” sort of relationships.

PLEASE NOTE: a lot of this could end up changing because of plot reasons, so don’t take this as exactly what will happen to the letter. This is a vague idea that I currently have jotted down, so take this with a grain of salt and thank you for your understanding.

Also, I WANT OPINIONS ON THIS!

Good question! :]

[cherrytea556]

Look, i rarely read fan fiction but from what i seen, they call shows like helluva fan fiction because of the set ups and its overall identity crisis. What i mean by this is that helluva has a lot of set ups that either don't pay off or are forgotten by the next episode as well as the shows purpose being all over the place.

An example of the set ups not paying off is the agents from truth seekers. In that episode, we see them interrogate the demons along with containing real footage of them that could've been released to the public already, potentially causing trouble to the i.m.p business and the characters themselves. Now, you think this wouldve been an important set up to expand upon and possibly create a well written pay off for a finale or something like that. No, the characters never mention it again and when they are in the real world again (Seeing stars and Unhappy campers), its never mentioned either. Now you could argue that unhappy campers had moxxie and millie in disguises for people not to spot them like the agents but the thing is....not exactly? That's only from theory, not an actual confirmation of this since its never mentioned there or previously. A set up is suppose to expand within its characters and world in order to create stakes and make us care about the characters and their struggles with this set up, how are we suppose to believe they care about the agents potentially exposing them when they never brought it up again with the agents now just being ignored like one note characters which would be fine (like the murder family from episode 1) if it didnt set up a potentially interesting conflict that would make sense for helluva boss and just do nothing with it.

An example of the set ups being forgotten about even if it presumably payed off is blitzo and moxxie. In the same episode of truth seekers, they open up about their feelings and struggles and blitzo in the end promises to be a better friend. But after this, we never see blitzo treat moxxie any better than previously, its just back to status quo like nothing ever happened. When your setting up characters to develop as a payoff, you have to keep it consistent to show that the character changed, to show that the payoff mattered. But when you pay off the set up yet proceed to revert it back to status quo, your showing that the payoff was pointless because why even add this plotline if the character learnt nothing from it?

And with its identity struggle, helluva isnt sure of what it wants to be. The biggest examples that come to this are exs and oohs and western's energy

Exs and oohs main problem is the balance of seriousness with comedy. One scene is of moxxie crying his eyes out while the next is of him having to hear moaning noises from his boss and ex shagging the shed. One scene is of a goofy ass song of chaz craving sex from moxxie as the next is of moxxie crying his eyes out before another tonal whiplash strikes.

Western energy also has this problem as well like stolas repeating sex jokes 3 times during the scene where striker threatens him of harming him and his family along with stella acting like a saturday morning villain tbh. Like I dont need stella to be likable, I just need her to be interesting and more expanded upon than an angry bitch. The show never even gives us a reason either and again, any explanation from the character is theoretical from what we've already seen from her which isnt that much because they arent expanding her character which itself is tonally a mess since the whole shows shtick is to expand upon demon characters as complex as human beings. It cant decide whether it wants to be a serious character driven story (with serious plotlines, character arcs, character expansions, stakes etc) or a dark comedy like the beginning (one note villains, villains/antagonists we never see again, comedy at supposed serious moments, the status quo etc) and it leaves the show to feel like a tangled mess wrapped up on what it wants to be.

These i believe are why people call it fanfiction from how those problems might typically come from that sort of place. You can argue that it shouldn't be the right term to use when describing problems like those or that those arguments aren't valid but insinuating people calling your show fanfiction is because of homophobia is kinda nonsense to me especially when i argue its more of the term 'woke' that makes more sense for insinuating homophobia than 'fanfic' because whenever a queer character is in a show or a show has somewhat queer themes, alt right content creators, news and the media would often paint it as 'woke', portraying it as propaganda/indoctrination just because of queerness existing in that media.

I am also saying this as a queer woman myself (aromantic), calling people thinking queer shows like helluva are 'fanfic' is thinly veiled homophobia isnt the gotcha moment you think it is either. It's just disingenuous and makes you even more stubborn/hostile towards criticism.

[belmottetower]

ur post about jamie’s loan has me thinking soooo many thoughts but the main thing im confused about is this: how was jamie able to get on the starting line-up so quickly after returning from his loan to richmond? city obviously hadn’t originally intended to recall jamie for a while as of 106 — jamie’s loan being pulled and him actually being sent back is presented like a surprising piece of information for everyone in the team, and i just can’t interpret that as “his contract was expiring soon, he just went back a week earlier than normal”. it felt like ted (at the very least) was setting up jamie to stay for a while after that, both strategically and socially. so, if he had spent much less time in richmond than intended (and thus probably developed a lot less than intended), how did he manage to start in richmond’s relegation match? it could have been city trying to give him more minutes against a lower ranked team, but then why would they start him AND let him play the whole game even after it was tied 1-1 if he’s not a consistent part of the starting line up? im a silly little american who knows nothing about european football, but it just doesn’t make sense how jamie could go from “we’re going to give you so few minutes that we basically have to loan u out or else you’re just wasting time” to “you’re going to be on the starting line up/close to it” so quickly once returning to city? was it just him learning to be a team player or is the show just getting fuzzy w the details? (also that was so long im sorry this is just a Very Specific Question and im trying to get it across properly)

This is referring to things from my earlier loan ask, so linking that here.

First of all, I am sure that Jamie's loan was meant to go until the end of the season. However, a loan can be terminated at any point during the season if both parties agree to it. So in this case, City saw he wasn't playing every possible minute with Richmond and they said to Richmond, "if you aren't going to play him, we want him back. We'd rather be the ones training and not using him if YOU'RE not going to use him." They were the ones that instigated the recall of Jamie, Rebecca just simply had to agree to it on behalf of Richmond and Jamie goes home. (Let's not worry about the fact that his agent would have been involved in this process because 2 seconds of digging in that direction makes the plot fall apart.)

But Jamie had been playing for Richmond for almost a full season at this point, from the summer of 2019 to what has to be around the February of 2020. He was there for over nine months of the season, and he went back to City when they only had a couple of months left.

In 1.08, when he visits Keeley, it's late March and he tells her that City were in town playing West Ham. He says "I had ten touches, I had two completed dribbles, and in the 89th minute they let me take a free kick." This implies to me that he was being brought on as a substitute at that point. Because ten touches, for a forward, is not very many during a full 90 minutes. And then the "They let me" in terms of taking a free kick sounds to me like he's still very much not a major power player, more like he's been given a chance, like "give the kid a turn, see how he handles it."

But it still feels to me like City valued Jamie as a player, and when they got him back after around nine months of a loan, they decided to give him a few more chances and see what he could do. And if he's succeeding for them in games as a sub, it's more likely that he will start the next match.

And the thing about the Richmond relegation match is that it's implied City had already secured the Premier League title, weeks before. They are not awarded the trophy at the end of the match. They're not celebrating having won the League. There's no commentary from Arlo and Chris about how City need this to secure the title, unlike they way they explain it in 3.11 and 3.12. So Ted's dressing room speech about giving the champs 90 minutes of hell implies to me that City were ALREADY the league champions, that they'd won it a little earlier in the season. Hopefully it's clear to everyone by now that with a league table, this is pretty common, if someone gets enough points that it is mathematically impossible for other teams to catch up. 

In real life, this year City won the league with three matches left to play. And in this circumstance, once the thing is already won, Pep will shake up the starting line ups quite dramatically and give different players the chance to play. For example, Cole Palmer, who I mentioned in the other post? He started for City in their matches against Chelsea and Brentford at the end of the season, AFTER City had already secured the title, when there were no consequences to City winning or losing. They won against Chelsea and Palmer got an assist on the winning goal, and they actually lost to Brentford in the final match of the season but it didn't matter. Pep uses a high rotation anyway - City does not have a fixed starting eleven, it changes all the time, Palmer has started a handful of other matches in various competitions - but this is very likely what happened to Jamie in terms of the Richmond match. It's the only match we know for an absolute fact that he started in for City, and it's probably because it was a game where the line-up could be changed around and experimented with to give different players opportunities, because they weren't "playing for anything."

Basically, in summary - Jamie played for Richmond for 9-10 months (depending on how early he came in preseason.) By the end of that stay he had played a lot more minutes by then than he ever had before even if he didn't get to stay the whole length of the season. City knew he'd improved and recalled him, deciding that if Richmond weren't going to utilise him, they'd prefer he be with them in Manchester to use when they want. They start using him as a sub in the last couple of months of the season, and he proves himself to be a valuable player for them. So he gets to play more minutes, maybe gets subbed on earlier each game, and eventually he gets to start a few matches, especially ones after City has already won the title and Jamie gets to play the match just for the experience.

In terms of being a team player, I fairly strongly believe that at City, this would have been a given for Jamie no matter what. Jamie got full of himself playing as a 1-up-front striker at Richmond, maybe in a 4-2-3-1 formation, but that's not how he would have ever played at City. Pep's favourite formation during that era of City is 4-3-3 and that's what Jamie was playing in for the Richmond match, he was part of a line of three (the formations are on the Arlo White cheat sheet) against Richmond's 4-4-2. City in this shape favours high possession and passing, so Jamie would have to have been succeeding within the style Pep wanted, i.e., being a team player and passing a lot and not acting as an individual star taking control of the match.

Jamie at Richmond was a selfish player largely because he didn't see the other players as good enough. He saw himself as a cut above them and their only value was to facilitate him in taking control of the match. He's not actually wrong about the skill level objectively, and even Roy admits it in 1.04 - that he knows he should be passing to Jamie but he can't stand Jamie's attitude about it. Because shaping the team to facilitate a star striker like that is not inherently bad football, not if the player isn't a cunt about it - it's a bit like what we saw with Zava, which looked ridiculous to us as viewers but was not actually a situation that anyone other than Jamie resented because Zava made the others feel valued, even if it felt fake to us. But look. Footballers do understand that some players are just better than others, and if your star striker is a nice person who makes everyone feel valued and treats people as proper teammates, there's nothing wrong with the tactic being "get the ball to that person and let them take charge." 

Richmond was Jamie's first taste of being that heroic superstar, where he was the one with all the glory, and because he didn't see the rest of them as on his level, he became a bad "team player" due to not recognising the part the rest of the team played in his success, or helping them improve (playing with people better than you should make you better, generally!) or believing that any of the others could achieve anything. He felt he was doing it all by himself. And George Cartrick clearly also had no interest in training the team in any other way. Very much "just get the ball to Tartt, he's the only one who's any good, and try not to fuck up in the process" as opposed to using Jamie's prowess to elevate EVERYONE. 

At City, where Jamie probably wasn't the best player on the team, where the standards were more equally at his level or better, this factor is not an issue. That's not how Pep trains them, it's not how Pep thinks. Jamie knows that he's not the solo star there. He knows that all the other great players will be contributing to making things happen, that everyone is smart and talented and aren't going to fuck up. Whether he liked it or not, he would have had trust in the way that playing style works, knowing that it's what's being asked of him from Pep and what the situation calls for. But Jamie didn't trust the Richmond players to be good enough to contribute. We see this Sam a lot - his attacks on Sam are often because Sam has failed to put a pass where Jamie wanted it, or missed a shot in training, or whatever. This is not an excuse for his behaviour but it is clear evidence that Jamie is frustrated because the rest of the team isn't at his level. And unlike season 3, he has no interest in working with them on improving, or showing them how best to play with him. Being a good team player isn't always about sharing the ball equally or whatever, it's about working as a team to feed each other's strengths - that's how season 3 Jamie can be both a team player and a total star player at the same time.

Honestly, to me, Jamie making that extra pass in 1.10 wasn't anything to do with Ted, aside from narratively for us as viewers. That's just how City plays football. That's Pep's influence, not Ted's. Ted sees it happen and thinks he's done something to change Jamie's attitude but in my opinion, Jamie is just playing the way Pep wants him to, because he actually values Pep's opinion about tactics in a way he didn't value Ted's. 

There is no way in hell Jamie went from age 13, or whenever he was scouted, to age 23, being a consistently selfish ball hog style player at Man City. Lots of players want to be stars, but I believe that the level we see in season 1 is just how he thought he needed to play at Richmond, because he felt like he was the only one who knew what he was doing and making anything happen on the pitch, and then of course he liked how it felt to have all that attention on him. But the way Jamie was playing at Richmond is simply not how City play football, and season 3 makes that canon to the Ted version of City too, not just an unfounded real life football comparison. City in the show are coached by Real Pep and play Pep's version of total football. That's what Jamie was doing when he made the extra pass,  and it's his experience with Pep's total football that allows Jamie to help Richmond so much in season 3.

[braveclementine]

Furious with Fury

Warnings: None

Copyright: I do not own any Marvel characters or locations. However, I do own my OC Elizabeth Lightwood. I do not condone any copying of this.

"Lacerated Spinal column, cracked sternum, shattered collarbone, perforated liver, and one hell of a headache." Fury rambled off his injuries.

"Don't forget your collapsed lung." The doctor who was treating Natasha's shoulder said. He was also making you sit in a chair with Steve pressing a wad of gauze against your hip wound. News flash! You actually had been shot in the bus and just hadn't noticed it. Apparently you were great at blocking out pain.

"Let's not forget that." Fury agreed sardonically. "Otherwise, I'm good."

"They cut you open. Your heart stopped." Natasha whispered.

"Tetrodotoxin B." Fury explained and you nodded almost to yourself. "Slows the pulse to one beat a minute. Banner developed it for stress. Didn't work so great for him, but we found a use for it."

"Why all the secrecy? Why not just tell us?" Steve asked angrily.

"Any attempt on the Director's life had to look successful." Maria answered for Fury.

"Can't kill you if you're already dead." Fury said, almost sounding cheerful about it. "Besides, I wasn't sure who to trust."

🎃 :::::  🧡  ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━  🧡  ::::: 🎃

"Speak to me Tony." You mumbled quietly on the private phone of Maria Hill. It couldn't be traced at all so you felt secure enough to use it.

"I traced this guy through the cameras. He's in some sort of church on the corner of Marx and 10th." Tony rambled into the phone. "I've hacked the cameras that I can. They've got some sort of underground base there, with a machine which he's in. They've said something about prepping him and wiping him. Y/N, I think they're taking his memories."

"That makes sense." You mumbled sadly. "Steve said it was as though he didn't recognize him."

"Howard used to talk about him too." Tony said, "I have a file here with all sorts of information. Sergeant James Buchannan Barnes. Part of the 107th Infantry Regiment during the war. Soulmated to Steve Rogers. He has a disciplinary charge in the army. Howard made a note about it. Apparently he and Steve got into a brawl when he found out that Steve and Peggy had fallen in love. Howard thought they might work out a poly relationship after Bucky calmed down. It looked promising too, except that Bucky fell off the train."

"Bloody hell." You muttered. "God Tony, I feel so bad for the both of them. Steve finding his soulmate but not being able to be with him. And Bucky. . . he doesn't want this, does he?"

Tony inhaled sharply. "He's screaming right now. He let them do it to him, he's being compliant, but he's in pain Y/N. I don't think that's something you should tell Steve though."

"No, probably not." You said, glancing over your shoulder. Fury was out of bed, talking to the others. "Tony, I-"

You stopped. You weren't sure if you wanted to tell him how useless you felt.

No secrets.

"I feel useless. I haven't done anything productive on this trip except be a body that Steve has to protect."

"You're not useless Y/N." Tony said. "If anything, I am. I can't be there, I can't be fighting."

"You're not S.H.I.E.L.D." You pointed out. "But Cap is and Nat is and even I am because I'm an Agent here. You're free. Be glad for that."

"None of you should be part of that." Tony said and you thought he sounded almost angry. "We were supposed to be the Avengers. Not, some of us are Avengers only at certain points of time while the other half get to save the life every single day!"

"I thought you wanted to retire." you joked half-heartedly.

Tony sighed, "Not when it comes to things like this. You're in danger and I can't do anything."

You were quiet for a moment, "Is the suit ready? We're going to need you."

"You are?"

You thought about it. "Maybe. There's these helicarriers that. . . well I don't know anything yet. I'm not planning right now, I had to talk to you. But if they're in the air. . . well I might need a lift."

"You can count on me sweetheart. The new suit is done."

"Good. I'll try and let you know. This is Maria's phone, so there's that." You laughed dejectedly. "I love you."

"I love you too." Tony said and then he hesitated and said, "I know you kissed someone. I could feel it through the bond. Was it Rogers?"

"CPR." You explained. "And then I woke up it was sort've like a relief kiss. I was going to tell you in person. Sorry."

"You're not. . . you know. . . you don't have."

"I love you Tony. No one else. I swear that on Everleigh."

"I love you too." And you could hear he sounded much happier. "Please stay safe."

"I will." You said, touching the stitches on your side in afterthought. "Bye."

". . . need to breach those carriers and replace their targeting blades with our own." Fury said, glancing over at you as you came back up. You slid the phone across the table to Maria.

"One or two won't cut it. We need to link all three carriers for this to work." Maria said, "Because if even one of those ships remain operational, a whole lot of people are going to die."

"We have to assume everyone aboard those carriers are HYDRA. We have to get past them, insert these server blades. And maybe, just maybe we can salvage what's left-"

"We're not salvaging anything!" Steve said angrily. "We're not just taking down those carriers, Nick. We're taking down S.H.I.E.L.D."

"S.H.I.E.L.D. had nothing to do with this!"

"You gave me this mission! This is how it ends! S.H.I.E.L.D's been compromised. You said so yourself. HYDRA grew right under you nose and nobody noticed."

"Why do you think we're meeting in this cave? I noticed.

"How many paid the price before you did?"

"Look, I didn't know about Barnes."

"Even if you had, would you have told me? Or would you have compartmentalized that too? S.H.I.E.L.D, HYDRA, it all goes."

"He's right." Maria said softly, putting a hand over Fury's.

Fury looked over at Nat who leaned back in her chair and then looked up at Sam, "Don't look at me. I do what he does, just slower."

Fury chuckled, "Well, It looks like you're giving the orders now, Captain."

"One for each ship." You said to yourself, thinking everything over. They all looked at you and you pointed between yourself, Steve, and Maria in answer, but didn't say anything else.

"Whoa, wait, what about me?" Nat asked.

You looked at her, "Look, I'm not planning anything. It was just a suggestion."

You turned your back on them, sitting down at the steps again, biting on your thumb. You weren't going to be useless anymore. You were getting on one of those ships and you were going to help.

No matter the price.

🎃 :::::  🧡  ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━  🧡  ::::: 🎃

In the end, it was you, Steve, Maria, and Sam. Steve stole his uniform from the museum and wore that. Fury had extra Agent uniforms, so you were suited up in that.

Now that you were in training clothes, you felt more confident, like it had given you some sort of confidence boost. You felt stronger, more flexible, more combatant.

It was like a placebo. In plain clothes, you felt to much like yourself. To much like that little girl that cowered under her fathers belt and her mothers fists. But in your Agent uniform, you were someone who could take on the world, take on HYDRA, take on S.H.I.E.L.D., take on helicarriers that wanted to kill people. Take on the Winter Soldier.

You broke into the headquarters, finding your way to the broadcast room. Steve took the mic.

"Attention all S.H.I.E.L.D. agents, this is Steve Rogers. You've heard a lot about me over the last few days. Some of you were even ordered to hunt me down. But I think it's time you know the truth. S.H.I.E.L.D. is not what we thought it was. It's been taken over by HYDRA. Alexander Pierce is their leader. The S.T.R.I.K.E. and Insight crew are HYDRA as well. I don't know how many more, but I know they're in the building. They could be standing right next to you. They almost have what they want. Absolute control. They shot Nick Fury. And it won't end there. If you launch those helicarriers today, HYDRA will be able to kill anyone that stands in their way. Unless we stop them. I know I'm asking a lot, But the price of freedom is high. It always has been. And it's a price I'm willing to pay. And if I'm the only one, so be it. But I'm willing to be I'm not."

"Ahem. Testing, testing, fabulous speech Capsicle. I'll drink to that and you're definitely welcome to our house later." Tony's voice came in, hacking the recordings from outside of the tower. "Let's kick some HYDRA butt, alright?"

Steve actually laughed.

"Did you write that down first, or was it off the top of your head?" Sam asked with a smirk. You were beaming, now that Tony was here.

"They're opening the bay doors." Tony shouted in your com. "I'm going to try and close them, but I don't think I'll be able to."

"Okay." you said back, rushing out the door without waiting for Steve. You kept one gun in your hand, shooting anyone that was wearing black.

"Tony you got eyes on me?" You shouted as you started to run out of running room.

"I'm coming now." Tony said and you saw him run. You didn't even hesitate, jumping through the window and landing on his back.

"Hey Cap!" Sam shouted into your coms, "I found those bad guys you were talking about." You could see him spinning to avoid the gun shots.

"Low, Tony." You ordered, but he was already doing it.

"I'll drop you off and help Falcon with the engaging process. Anywhere in particular you want me to drop you?" Tony asked. You caught sight of Nat- well not Nat because she was in disguise- but technically Nat in the room with Pierce and the other guards.

"Yeah, over there."

Tony flew you over, blasting the glass and you rolled in, shooting one of the guards in face. Nat immediately leapt into action, kicking Pierce and helping you take down the other guards. She stood back up and the two of you pointed guns at Pierce.

"I'm sorry." Natasha said, unveiling herself from her mask and tugging the wig off. "Did I step on your moment?"

"All right, Cap. I'm in." Sam's voice said.

"Oh, well, it was nice meeting all of you." You said, backing up to the window again, giving them a short bow. "Probably never see any of you again." And then you fell backwards out the widow.

"Very dramatic." Tony said as he caught you in his arms, shooting off towards the Quinjet.

Tony dropped you off on the ship and then went racing after a jet that was chasing Sam. He blasted it to bits in no time.

"Alpha lock." Steve said into the coms.

You grunted, ducking another guy as he swung his arm out at you, before you popped up, kicking him the chest, leaping off him, and planting your feet into the chest of another guard.

"Stark?"

"What?" You and Tony asked at the same time.

"Y/N." Maria corrected herself. "you're going to need a new nickname."

"Yep, call me Pumpkin." You grunted, parrying blows from your next attacker. "Works as well as anything."

"Right, where are you with the lock?"

"Held up." And then you shouted out as you were kicked of the platform, landing harshly on the one below it. "Hey thanks!" you shouted up a the guard, opening up the container and replacing the cards. "Brave lock!" You shouted.

"Falcon they have tracking missiles on you." Tony shouted.

You suddenly felt the entire ship starting to shake around you and you grabbed the railing to hold on. A hole was blasted into the ship, near where you were. Falcon came zooming past and you jumped. You held onto his back and he flew out of there.

"Two down, one to go." Maria said.

"Um, Cap, bad news." Stark said. "Winter is here. He's blowing all the jets on the runway. And now he just shot someone through the head. I'm going down."

"Hey Sam, I'm gonna need a ride!" Steve shouted.

"Um, I'm on him." You pointed out lightly. "Tony, you're gonna have to catch me. I'm jumping now." You leapt off Sam's back as Sam said, "Let me know when."

"I just did." Steve said.

"Are you kidding me!" Tony practically screamed, rocketing skyward to catch you.

Sam dropped Steve off on the roof of the third helicarrier and Tony dropped you off right next to him.

The four of you started walking and Sam said, "You know, you're a lot heavier than you look."

"I had a big breakfast."

You giggled.

"Watch out." Tony said, yanking you backwards just in time as Winter came barreling out, knocking Steve off the air ship.

"Steve!" You and Sam shouted together. Sam went to go get him, but Bucky caught his wing, tossing him backwards.

Tony immediately engaged with him, attempting to land hits on him, but Bucky was able to counter everything. You ran, leaping onto the railing to jump sideways, landing on Bucky's shoulders. You wrapped your cord around his neck, pulling tight.

You and Winter struggled on the top and you shouted to Sam, "Go!"

Sam attempted to go, but Winter stopped fighting you, shooting out a grappling hook that got one of his wings. You grunted, tightening the cord around his neck, trying to choke him out.

Winter caught hold of your leg, tossing you off of him. You crashed into some of the crates that were on the ship. You groaned in pain, hoping you didn't open your stitches up.

You saw Bucky kick Sam off the plane with only one wing and then started to stalk towards you. Tony slammed into him, the Iron Man suit sending Bucky flying.

You scrambled to your feet. You didn't have the third card, Steve did.

"Steve?" You shouted in your com, running for the door. Hopefully Tony would keep Bucky engaged long enough that you could find the control room. Maybe Tony would have a secret idea up his sleeve without the card. "Sam?"

"I'm still on the helicarrier." Steve said in your com as you burst through the door, running down a hallway.

"Sam, Rumlow is on his way to council." Maria said.

"Y/N, I'm disengaged with Barnes. He slipped through the door. I can't follow him unless I get out of the suit."

"Don't." You said quickly. "Join Sam and Natasha against Rumlow."

"Got it." Tony said.

You came to a stop, seeing that both Bucky and Steve had beaten you there. Bucky was standing in front of the cylindrical container that you needed to put the card in front of. Steve was standing on the walkway in front of him.

"People are gonna die Buck." Steve said softly. "I can't let that happen. Please don't make me do this. You're my soulmate. I love you."

Steve reacted first, throwing his shield which Bucky glanced off with his gun. Really, he was a fantastic fighter, but you were pretty sure that was because of HYDRA. It was a shame, really. He could've been useful with the Avengers. Maybe you guys could capture him and Tony could perform some sort of surgery on him to get his memories back. Then he could join.

You ducked as the bullets Steve was pinging off of his shield came towards you. You lifted your own gun, trying to aim for something non-lethal to shoot Bucky, but the two of them were fighting to furiously for you to get a good aim.

You could see Steve, between the fighting, trying to get the card into the slot. And then Bucky knocked the two of them off the side of the railing.

You ran forward, hurtling the railing, you slid past Steve and Bucky, grabbing the card with your finger. Steve ran at Bucky, engaging the two of them in battle so that you could run past the two of them. You leaped as high into the air as you could, the chip between your teeth, grabbing the railing and started to put yourself up.

"Y/N!" Steve shouted and you felt a hot pain race through your back. You almost slipped, but pulled yourself up over the railing. You fumbled for a moment, on your knees, trying to grab the knife out, but couldn't.

You huffed, getting back to your feet, stumbling over to the control console. Your hands were shaking, but you shoved the card in.

"Charlie Lock."

You looked over the railing in time to see that Steve and Bucky were much further down than you were. "STEVE!" You shouted as Bucky slammed a knife into his shoulder. Infuriated, you reached your arms back painfully, shouting in pain, and grabbed the knife handle, pulling it out.

You hurdled the railing once more, sliding down it, and then jumping to the same floor that they were on. You snapped your foot, catching Steve's shield, and threw it straight at Bucky's face. No more hesitation because he was Steve's soulmate. You had to act.

Shots rang out and you saw that Steve had been shot right through the stomach.

He fell to the ground, leaving you the only one to fight Bucky.

"Stop!" You shouted firmly, not in fear, but in hopes that you could get him to listen. "Your name. Your name is James Buchannan Barnes. You were born on March 10, 1917. You had a younger sister, her name was Rebecca Barnes. You lived with your mother."

Bucky paused for a moment, almost squinting at you.

"When you turned eighteen," From here you were doing a little guesswork, "You got a line on your arm with the name 'Captain.' And when Steve turned Eighteen two years later, he turned into a golden retriever puppy."

Bucky started walking towards you, almost snarling now. You swallowed hard, backing up, and continued, "It only took the two of you a month to have Stevie turn back human, before the two of you bonded. One month! You broke all of the records James." He paused again when you used his first name. You could see Steve now, a little behind Bucky, getting up.

You racked your brain for the next thing that you could say, "You joined the 107th Infantry Regiment during World War II. Your unit was captured in '43 by HYDRA. Zola experimented on you, but Steve saved you. You became part of the Howling Commandos. There was a train, you remember the train right?"

Bucky actually jerked a little and you felt yourself sigh in relief, "You fell off the train and Steve thought that his soulmate had died. So he crashed a plane to try and kill himself, to join you. If he knew what had actually happened, he would have searched the ends of the Earth for you. He loves you. He's your soulmate."

You were shaking because Bucky was standing toe to toe with you now, though he wasn't touching. Steve staggered to his feet.

"Bucky Barnes." You whispered. "HYDRA hasn't been kind to you. They've tortured you, I've heard your screams. They wipe your mind over and over. Do you know why they wiped you before you came here? Because you said, 'The man on the bridge. I knew him.' You repeated that you knew him and they wiped your memory. Because they don't want you to remember your soulmate."

Bucky was trembling, though you weren't sure with which emotion.

"Guys you have to get out of there." Maria said into the coms, "The guns are ready to fire."

"Bucky, come back with us." You whispered, being brave and sliding a hand gently up his chest. You showed him that your other hand was empty. "Come back with Steve at least."

"Y/N." Steve said, stumbling forwards and you looked at him. Taking your attention from the Soldier was the first mistake you made.

His hand shot out, grabbing you around the throat, lifting you inches off the floor. "James." You mumbled, trying not to fight. Trying to stay calm.

Steve rammed into him, gasping with pain. "Y/N. Jump. The ships are going down. I already told Maria to fire. I'm hurt and I can at least make sure that Bucky goes down with it and that I go down with Bucky."

Tears sparked your eyes. "Steve-"

"Take the shield."

The first shot hit the ship and you fell backwards.

Everyone got jolted around and you could hear Bucky crying out in pain. It sounded like a tortured cat or a dog.

"Y/N!" Tony shouted into your com, "Where are you."

"Tony." You gasped. "I'm okay. I need you to circle below the ships. I think I'm going to break the glass and fall. But you can't be to close okay?"

"Alright." Tony said, sounding worried.

You saw where Bucky was under a piece of metal and then looked for Steve. He was trying to make his way to Bucky and you rushed over to Bucky.

"Y/N I'm serious!" Steve shouted at you as he continued to fall towards Bucky. And seeing the Captain come for him, Bucky just tried harder to get out. "Get out of here!"

"SAM WHERE ARE YOU?" Natasha shouted.

"Northwest corner. 41st floor!"

"Stay where you are!"

"Not an option!"

There was silence for a moment before you heard Sam shout, "41st floor! 41st!"

"It's not like they put the floor numbers on the outside of the building!" Fury replied.

"Hill! Where's Steve?" Nat shouted into the coms, "Where's Stark? Pumpkin?"

Steve and you lifted the metal together and Bucky rolled out.

"You know me." Steve growled while you lay on your side, panting. Your back was in pain and your head felt fuzzy.

"No, I don't!" Bucky roared, knocking Steve off course. He fell to his knees beside you, but you couldn't move.

"Bucky. You've known me your whole life."

Bucky backhanded him and you rolled out of the way to avoid getting stepped on.

"Your name is James Buchannan Barnes." Steve said, a lot slower than you had. Maybe he would also have more luck, considering it was Steve saying it.

"Shut up!"

Steve took his helmet off, tossing it to the side. You wondered now if he had grabbed the uniform from the museum exactly for this purpose. So that Bucky could see his face, in the uniform he would have last saw him as he fell from the train.

"I'm not gonna fight you."

Steve dropped his shield and it fell into the depths below.

"You're my soulmate."

Bucky roared, running at him, catching him around the waist. "You're my mission." He started to punch Steve across the face and you found that tears were streaming down your face, though you didn't know when they started or why. "You're. My. Mission!"

"Then finish it." Steve said and you let out a sob. "Because I'm with you to the end of the line."

That made Bucky freeze.

You trembled, coming closer to them, kneeling beside Steve, ignoring Bucky. "Steve?"

And then something crashed into the glass, sending the both of you pitching out of the ship. You stayed conscious, looking for Tony, but realized that he couldn't be anywhere around here because of all the debris falling from the sky. He had been waiting for you to give an order. He'd trusted you to give him an order.

"Tony." You choked out.

"Y/N, speak to me."

"Steve and I-" You whispered. "we're headed for the water."

"I can't see you!" He shouted. But it didn't matter, because the two of you had hit the water.

You grabbed Steve's arm, refusing to lose him in the water. The two of you sunk quickly, even as you tried to kick your feet towards surface.

And then an arm grabbed you in the back.

'Tony!' You thought excitedly, even as you felt the metal brush your back. You tightened your hold on Steve and when your head broke the surface, you turned with a smile, which you didn't let drop even at your surprise that it was Bucky.

He dragged the both of you to surface, dropping you both on the ground. He stared down at Steve for a moment- who was unconscious- but you staggered to your feet.

"Bucky?" You asked softly, touching his metal hand. It was cold under your touch, and not wet as though it repelled the water. "Stay."

Bucky did not look away from Steve, but shook his head.

"Then, Promise me, for Steve, that you won't go back to HYDRA. Don't let them get you Bucky. Don't let them take these memories from you. You are good. You saved your soulmate. Don't let HYDRA take the good from you."

You didn't know if your words worked, because he simply turned and walked away.

You looked around and saw why Tony hadn't seen you. You were on the river bank on the complete opposite side of the headquarters.

"Tony? Tony?" You tried to ask, but realized the com was dead. The water had killed it.

You turned to Steve, seeing water trickle from the corner of his mouth and you fell to your knees. You smiled ironically, knowing that it was your turn to administer the CPR. You started with chest comprehension, before tipping his head back and blowing air into his lungs.

🎃 :::::  🧡  ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━  🧡  ::::: 🎃

You sat quietly with Sam and Tony in Steve's sick bed. Tony was half asleep with Everleigh sitting in his lap. Sam was flipping through a magazine. You were going through every file imaginable on Tony's top secret, non hackable laptop to find any trace of Bucky.

But there was a reason he had never been caught.

You and Tony had gone home after he'd found you on the riverbank with Steve. You'd told him the entire story start to finish, including that his parents accident wasn't really an accident. You told him you think HYDRA caused it somehow, but you didn't know how or why.

He had nodded, looking hurt and angry, but thanked you that you could tell him that.

You had gone to the hospital yourself for some time, getting stitches for your knife wound and a few other cuts, scrapes, and wounds that hadn't been taken care of while you had been on the run.

"I never want to go on the run again." You joked with him.

"On your left." Steve's quiet voice broke the silence. You looked up at him with a smile, but didn't say anything.

🎃 :::::  🧡  ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━  🧡  ::::: 🎃

You went with Steve and Sam to Fury's grave, holding a huge file with everything you could possibly find on the Winter Soldier. Tony had helped you, mostly with hacking HYDRA secrets and such.

It had helped that Natasha had leaked all sorts of confidential information to the public, lots of it HYDRA. And so the documents in there about the Winter Soldier were the most useful to your cause.

"Here." You said, handing it over to Steve who took it quickly.

"What is all of that?" Sam asked.

"Everything I could find on Bucky." You had opted to say his name instead of his alias, to show Steve that you thought he was a real person worth fighting for. Worth finding.

"So, you've experienced this sort of thing before," A friendly, familiar voice said from behind the three of you. "

"You get used to it." Steve replied lightly, with a small smile on his face.

"We've been data mining HYDRA's files." Fury said. "Looks like a lot of rats didn't go down with the ship. I'm headed to Europe tonight. Wanted to ask if you'd come."

"There's something I gotta do first." Steve said.

"How about you, Wilson? Could use a man with your abilities."

"I'm more of a soldier than a spy." Sam replied.

Fury nodded and looked at you. "I'd ask you, except you'd bring Stark along and I don't need that kind of publicity. Besides, you should lay low. Rumlow will be looking for you."

"I know." You said, wanting to laugh at the Tony thing and slightly scared of the Rumlow thing. "Nat said Barton is coming back soon. He'll kick up my training."

Fury shook the three of your guys hands and then said, "Anybody asks for me, tell them they can find me, right here."

"You should be honored. That's about as close as he gets to saying thank you." Nat called out, walking up with a file under her arm. Nowhere near as big as the one you'd brought. You wondered what was inside.

"Not going with him?" Steve asked.

"No."

He walked to join her and you looked at Sam, "Your soulmate okay?"

"Stephen? Yeah. Freaked out completely though about what happened."

"He sounds like a handful. Want any tips? I swear he sounds just like Tony." You said with a grin.

"How do you get him to stop being mad at you for risking your life?" Sam asked.

You grinned. "Well, for me, I put our daughter down to sleep, and then I suck his cock."

Sam laughed, "Might have to try that then."

Once Nat left, you and Sam joined him and you saw that the folder contained Bucky. Attached to the inside was a picture that you had seen, but hadn't put in the folder first. It was a picture of Bucky behind frozen glass, clearly in cryo.

"You're going after him." Sam stated.

"You don't have to come with me." Steve said.

"I know. When do we start?"

You smiled, kissing Sam's cheek and then Steve's. "Good luck Steve. I hope you find him. If you need inside help, call me. But I have to stay here and become a better Agent. I froze to many times on this trip and that can't happen again."

"Y/N!" Steve protested.

You smiled and said, "Steve, count the amount of times you had to save my life or protect me. And then name the amount of times I did anything useful. It's about a count of 95- 4. I don't want you to regret me coming on a mission again. Besides, you're technically my boss now and I would never want to disappoint a boss."

"You're not a disappointment." Steve smiled, "But I understand. Clint better up your training."

You smirked and then walked off and then ran home.

Ran home to Tony. 

[ethanhuntfemmefatale]

Given your username I kinda want ur thoughts on Ethan Hunt And Gender. Bc I'm always thinking about Ethan and Gender.

OUGH arc thank you for asking this I am literally constantly thinking about Ethan hunt and gender. Ethan’s relationship with masculinity is insane (as you’ve spoken to eloquently before, he uses it as a persona! It’s not even one of his favorite ones!) His gender is sooo personal to me because it feels crazy close to my own feelings about gender and the way I experience it.

Thoughts on the eternally developing thesis of Ethan Hunt and gender:

In my mind (I can say this to you arc cause you know RGU) Ethan hunt experiences gender in the same way that Utena does. His gender is more “prince” than “man” or “woman”—he identifies as a protector. Which is traditionally stereotyped as a masculine thing, but he approaches it in a way that doesn’t feel clearly gendered. I don’t think that gender is something he thinks about in relation to his own private self. Gender is something he uses, to play into expectations, to influence people’s opinions of him, etc. Ethan generally doesn’t think much about his identity outside of spywork (in later movies) and as a result by 4,5,6,7 he settles into a natural state that feels very ungendered to me, although he takes on gender when he has to, with varying degrees of comfort. (The John Lark performance clearly doesn’t sit well, despite Lark being—in behavior if not in backstory—fairly spot on the action hero stereotype.) Ethan seems most insecure in his gender during the movies where he’s searching for an identity that isn’t “agent of the IMF” (read: prince). He tries on “doting husband” in MI3, and “homme fatale” in MI2, and neither of them totally…feel secure. He’s trying to do something, and he’s very good at becoming different people, so he pulls it off, but it means he’s subtly Performing all the time. In MI2 and MI3 I feel like that subtle performance of gender adds to this sense of anxiety, this sense that Ethan is trying really hard in all the scenes he’s in, and it creates an extra element of stress that wears on me through the films. In Ghost Protocol, he grows his hair out, and he seems at ease in his body. Ever time I see the opening of that movie I just feel this overwhelming sense of relief. He’s not trying to be a certain kind of guy anymore. Arguably, he’s not trying to be a guy at all.

This goes well with Ethan’s whole “priest in the shadows” thing. He doesn’t have a societal role to play outside of “wandering protector”. And that’s comfortable for him! He likes that! Whenever he has to fit into the world things get weird, and he puts on masculinity like a suit to help him out with that. But on his own he’s something different.

I have endless thoughts on this but I’ll stop here for tonight cause I have to go to bed. Tomorrow I might post an addition about MI1 ethan and gender because that’s a whole other can of worms (highly influenced by his relationship with jim and Claire imo.) Thank you so much for this ask<333

[shipcestuous]

Today I found myself thinking about how different authors try to downplay or erase incest in godly ships in Greek mythology retellings... stuff like, "the gods don't have DNA so it's different for them" or "gods are manifestations of cosmic forces so they only consider themselves related but aren't in a biological sense." One example I think is pretty funny in its execution is the webcomic Lore Olympus.

Now, I admit I've never read it, but from what I understand, the main characters, Hades and Persephone, aren't uncle and niece. Hades is brothers with Zeus and Poseidon, but Persephone was created with magic by Demeter, who was also created with magic alongside Hera and Hestia, her non-biologically-related sisters.

However, Persephone looks A LOT like Hades' mother, Rhea, to the point that people who like the comic sometimes say Hades is getting to "do it all over again" and have a better and healthier version of his parents' marriage (Hades himself looks a lot like his father, who is still Kronos, and yes, he still ate his kids) while people who dislike it (it's pretty divisive, and idly digging into all the drama is actually the one reason I know all this) joke about him just having Oedipus complex.

I think at one point (maybe before Lore Olympus was picked up by Webtoon?) Rhea actually had a much different design, but then the author retconned that to make her more similar to Persephone. And while Rhea is essentially a giantess, being a Titan, and Persephone is usually short and petite, Persephone can ALSO become a giantess, when she unlocks her full power or something like that. I think I've even heard that Hades REALLY likes it when she does that...

Anyway, in the same series, there's also two, or rather three, other examples of "related in myth, unrelated in the comic" that I think are quite unexpected and interesting.

One is Hestia and Athena. As I said above, Hestia isn't related to Zeus, and tbh, I'm not sure if ATHENA even is at this point, but in mythology, they're aunt and niece, being respectively Zeus' sister and his daughter. Here, they run some kind of support organization for young goddesses, where all new members have to take an oath of chastity and swear off relationship for some reason, but they actually have a forbidden secret relationship themselves.

Another, even more surprising one is Kronos and Hera... which leads directly to Hades and Hera right after. From what I understand, during the Titanomachy, Hera pretended to switch sides and ally herself with Kronos, but really, she was a double agent gathering intelligence to help Zeus and the others. To do that, she seduced Kronos, but then, he developed some sort of creepy, obsessive "love" for her. I think Rhea had been killed by Kronos or otherwise died by that point. Anyway, after Zeus freed his brothers and confined Kronos in Tartarus, Hera and Hades bonded over the trauma Kronos had inflicted on them and started a relationship, which I'm pretty sure continued for a time, in some on-and-off way, even after Hera married Zeus to become his queen.

Oh, and here's a fun bonus! Aside from all of this, I've heard of some much rarer, pseudo-incestuous, "unrelated in the myths, related in the comic" type weirdness, too...

You know the myth of Hades' concubine Minthe, whom he set aside after marrying Persephone, but who kept claiming Hades would leave Persephone to come back to her one day, until either Persephone or Demeter turned her into a mint plant for it in a rage? Well, in Lore Olympus, Minthe is Hades' girlfriend at the beginning of the story, but they both have issues and they aren't a good match for each other. Which is possibly why they have an open relationship, with Hades visiting strip clubs and whatnot and Minthe having a side thing with Thanatos, who is the son of Nyx and Erebos in the myths... but here turns out to be Hades' adopted son after Nyx left him in his care as a small child.

I distinctly remember seeing a panel showing that Hades had bought a ring for Minthe, so he must have been planning to propose to her before he met Persephone... which means that Thanatos was having an affair with a woman who could have soon become his own stepmother! Personally, I like to imagine what might have happened had they kept it up even with Minthe becoming Hades' wife... but that's just me, lol. In the comic itself, Hades eventually asks Minthe to have a more committed relationship despite already having feelings for Persephone himself, so she breaks it off with Thanatos, and he then moves on to Daphne, the same one Apollo falls in obsessive love with in the myths... yep, lots of unexpected ships, it seems!

But, imho, this is also interesting because Daphne is ANOTHER character who looks kind of a lot like Persephone. And, as an outsider looking in, it almost seems like a pattern for Thanatos to me... first going for his dad's girlfriend, then for a girl who's very similar to his dad's new girlfriend...

From what I think I understood about Thanatos' own subplot, Hades was a very neglectful and cold father to him because he was afraid that if he'd let himself grow close to him, eventually he'd somehow end up treating him the way Kronos had treated HIM as a child. But as a kid, Thanatos couldn't know what was actually going on in his head, and obviously he was still upset about Nyx abandoning him, so he started acting up, and then their relationship worsened from there. And so, my incest-shipping brain can't help but wonder... what if going for Minthe and then a Persephone lookalike was a subconscious way for Thanatos to try and feel closer to Hades, or maybe finally get his attention, if his affection was just too difficult to obtain...?

I think it's very unlikely I'll ever actually read Lore Olympus, because it seems longer than I usually like when it comes to romantic dramas and I've read some things about the way it handles its plot and characters, as well as certain sensitive themes (some of them showing up in the very same subplots I mentioned here, which would be the most interesting to me), that really put me off. But there's an AU of it more or less living rent-free in my head where Hades was in angsty unrequieted love with Rhea and Thanatos is now in angsty unrequieted love with Hades.

... And Hades/Persephone and Hestia/Athena are uncle/niece and aunt/niece, Kronos/Hera is father/daughter, and Hades/Hera is brosis, naturally. Because why not be as self-indulgent as I can while I'm at it, after all?

All of the incest with none of the incest? That's what this sounds like to me, lol. I do find the erasing of the incestuousness in various adaptations to be amusing. I just ignore it!

Some of these relationships in Lore Olympus sound pretty interesting. But they would be a lot more interesting if they were related!

[dawnfelagund]

How to Block AI Bots from Scraping Your Website

The Silmarillion Writers' Guild just recently opened its draft AI policy for comment, and one thing people wanted was for us, if possible, to block AI bots from scraping the SWG website. Twelve hours ago, I had no idea if it was possible! But I spent a few hours today researching the subject, and the SWG site is now much more locked down against AI bots than it was this time yesterday.

I know I am not the only person with a website or blog or portfolio online that doesn't want their content being used to train AI. So I thought I'd put together what I learned today in hopes that it might help others.

First, two important points:

I am not an IT professional. I am a middle-school humanities teacher with degrees in psychology, teaching, and humanities. I'm self-taught where building and maintaining websites is concerned. In other words, I'm not an expert but simply passing on what I learned during my research today.

On that note, I can't help with troubleshooting on your own site or project. I wouldn't even have been able to do everything here on my own for the SWG, but thankfully my co-admin Russandol has much more tech knowledge than me and picked up where I got lost.

Step 1: Block AI Bots Using Robots.txt

If you don't even know what this is, start here:

About /robots.txt

How to write and submit a robots.txt file

If you know how to find (or create) the robots.txt file for your website, you're going to add the following lines of code to the file. (Source: DataDome, How ChatGPT & OpenAI Might Use Your Content, Now & in the Future)

User-agent: CCBot Disallow: /

AND

User-agent: ChatGPT-User Disallow: /

Step Two: Add HTTPS Headers/Meta Tags

Unfortunately, not all bots respond to robots.txt. Img2dataset is one that recently gained some notoriety when a site owner posted in its issue queue after the bot brought his site down, asking that the bot be opt-in or at least respect robots.txt. He received a rather rude reply from the img2dataset developer. It's covered in Vice's An AI Scraping Tool Is Overwhelming Websites with Traffic.

Img2dataset requires a header tag to keep it away. (Not surprisingly, this is often a more complicated task than updating a robots.txt file. I don't think that's accidental. This is where I got stuck today in working on my Drupal site.) The header tags are "noai" and "noimageai." These function like the more familiar "noindex" and "nofollow" meta tags. When Russa and I were researching this today, we did not find a lot of information on "noai" or "noimageai," so I suspect they are very new. We used the procedure for adding "noindex" or "nofollow" and swapped in "noai" and "noimageai," and it worked for us.

Header meta tags are the same strategy DeviantArt is using to allow artists to opt out of AI scraping; artist Aimee Cozza has more in What Is DeviantArt's New "noai" and "noimageai" Meta Tag and How to Install It. Aimee's blog also has directions for how to use this strategy on WordPress, SquareSpace, Weebly, and Wix sites.

In my research today, I discovered that some webhosts provide tools for adding this code to your header through a form on the site. Check your host's knowledge base to see if you have that option.

You can also use .htaccess or add the tag directly into the HTML in the <head> section. .htaccess makes sense if you want to use the "noai" and "noimageai" tag across your entire site. The HTML solution makes sense if you want to exclude AI crawlers from specific pages.

Here are some resources on how to do this for "noindex" and "nofollow"; just swap in "noai" and "noimageai":

HubSpot, Using Noindex, Nofollow HTML Metatags: How to Tell Google Not to Index a Page in Search (very comprehensive and covers both the .htaccess and HTML solutions)

Google Search Documentation, Block Search Indexing with noindex (both .htaccess and HTML)

AngryStudio, Add noindex and nofollow to Whole Website Using htaccess

Perficient, How to Implement a NoIndex Tag (HTML)

Finally, all of this is contingent on web scrapers following the rules and etiquette of the web. As we know, many do not. Sprinkled amid the many articles I read today on blocking AI scrapers were articles on how to override blocks when scraping the web.

This will also, I suspect, be something of a game of whack-a-mole. As the img2dataset case illustrates, the previous etiquette around robots.txt was ignored in favor of a more complicated opt-out, one that many site owners either won't be aware of or won't have time/skill to implement. I would not be surprised, as the "noai" and "noimageai" tags gain traction, to see bots demanding that site owners jump through a new, different, higher, and possibly fiery hoop in order to protect the content on their sites from AI scraping. These folks serve to make a lot of money off this, which doesn't inspire me with confidence that withholding our work from their grubby hands will be an endeavor that they make easy for us.

[scarlet--wiccan]

I wonder about your thoughts on a certain element of the recent scarlet witch as a loki fan (I’m less familiar with their familial status quo). I realize I’m over thinking this so like, advanced warning

During the truth-off loki refers to Laufy as their “true father” and Wanda uses the same term to describe magneto. Laufy is Loki’s bio dad as far as I’m aware but mags is maintained in-issue as Wanda’s “adoptive dad”. Maybe that was just distinguishing max from Joseph, but even so, it’s a strange line. True doesn’t need to mean bio imo but it reeks of Django erasure. Who of Loki’s fathers is his “favorite”? Who had the most impact on her overall? (Magneto can claim that title for Wanda probably, without him she might never have become an avenger and had kids with vision, hom wouldn’t have happened, etc)

I've been meaning to post about this, actually, so thank you for reminding me.

Throughout Scarlet Witch, Orlando has identified Magneto as Wanda's "adoptive father." This is not literally true-- Magneto never adopted the twins, or had any hand in raising them. In this case, I think Orlando is using this language to work past the awkwardness of the AXIS retcon-- Wanda spent years developing a familial relationship with Magneto based on the belief that he was her birth father, but since that's no longer the case, the best we can do is recontextualize it as a "chosen family" thing.

The thing is, as you pointed out, Wanda had an actual, literal adoptive father, Django Maximoff, so it feels a little clunky to apply that label to Magneto. I think describing their relationship as foster family, or chosen family, would make more sense.

I understand Loki calling Laufey their "true," as in, "birth" father, but you can't apply that same framework to Wanda and Magneto anymore, so it's very strange that Orlando does, even though it's only one line. This feels like an editing error, more than anything else.

Django Maximoff raised Wanda, risked everything to provide for her and her brother, and ultimately, he gave his life to save her from Chthon. That's her true father, and in the previous Scarlet Witch series, Wanda does affirm that she views Django and Marya as her parents, regardless of their actual relationship. I don't care what anyone says-- I love Magneto, I love their relationship, but he's not the dad that stepped up in this story.

Loki has a fraught relationship with all of their parents, but in recent years, the only person they demonstrate any real loyalty to is Freyja. The All-Mother has her failings as a parent, and she screwed Loki over bad in Agent of Asgard, but Jason Aaron put a lot of nuance into their relationship during his time on Thor & WoTR, and I think it shines the strongest.

Interestingly, we've seen flashbacks and references to a genuinely loving relationship between Odin and Loki when they were a child. I'm not super familiar with earlier Thor publication, but that's the impression I get from the current versions of the characters. That relationship has certainly eroded now, but it's still miles above Loki's feelings towards Laufey.

[mellxncollie]

hi olly!! gonna be greedy and ask for a fun fact from Let me bleed instead of you AND fire lookout au (my beloved), and anything you might want to mention about your gifs, mwah <333

alex you get all the fun facts!!

let me bleed instead of you fun fact:

Chapters 1-4 deal with the developing and hiding of secrets, and 5-8 are more about the sharing and revealing of secrets. The early secret reveals all mostly happen "off screen," so here's when those secrets are actually revealed:

2011 - Edwin talks to Charles about things he was thinking about during Chapter 3, and also starts to reveal stuff about Hell (Ch. 1).

2011-2023 - Edwin continues to occasionally share parts of what happened in Hell (Ch. 1) over the next decade or so, usually during quiet moments around the office.

2023 - Charles opens up about his anger (Ch. 2), partially as shown in canon, and also more shortly after Port Townsend (he's trying to be more open about things because Edwin shared this big thing and he wants to reciprocate somehow). Also, as we see in canon, the rest of Edwin's secrets about Hell all come to light (Ch. 1)

2024 - Charles has a discussion with Edwin about his fear of water (Ch. 4), probably as a result of something happening during a case and also involving the Night Nurse.

2025 - Edwin comes clean about actually visiting Charles' grave (Ch. 3), if I were to ever write a follow up, it would probably be this scene, though I don't have any plans (or time) to do that right now.

fire lookout au fun fact:

Charles' "death" is reworked in the AU (nearly dying of Hypothermia in the rain), and Edwin's "death" isn't really included beyond some vague references he mentions in writings to Niko about "the Incident" but there is a whole story there, inspired by the idea of "development Hell" but reworked for the book publishing industry (I know very little about the way the actual publishing industry works so let's just pretend that this is all normal and makes sense):

Edwin published two very popular horror/fantasy novels while in university, the first was about boys sacrificing their schoolmate, and was inspired by something more mundane that happened to him while at boarding school as a kid. The publisher signed him on, with the caveat that he would write a sequel to this first novel. However, none of his ideas/proposals were panning out, and the publisher kept rejecting them. They did publish his second (unrelated) book, but then he kept writing other stuff that they would refuse to even look at until he wrote a sequel that they liked. Lots of personal differences were involved, hurt feelings, etc. Four-ish years after the second book, he's called in by his publisher, and they release him from having to do a sequel, but also basically cut him off, saying they'll never work with him again. The sequel cancellation is announced, to the dismay of a lot of readers. He loses his agent, his publisher, and many of his fans who are hurt after being strung along for so long (It's been about 6 years since the first one comes out).

gif fun fact!

A lot of my sets end up having gifs cut from them, including ones that aren't edits. Like I'll delete the first or last gif just before pressing post. For example, this set only has 3 gifs. Originally, it also included this one at the start, which I only cut minutes before posting it since I decided the set was best and more emblematic if it was just 3 gifs of the 3 characters.

(I do love this gif since he's just so wiggly!)

[ryqfaeh]

Aliya's Last Moment

Dr.Ghazali : This is the place where we went to the picnic when you were little. Here the picture I took before she got sick.

Ali : Woah, Mama looks so beautiful. And... she even smiles happily here.

Dr.Ghazali : Yeah, she's like an angel, isn't she? I wish I can spend more time with her before she's gone.

Ali : Me too, but Mama said she's happy spending time with us before her leaving us. Like she knew her time already.

Dr.Ghazali : And you, Ali... you got all her resemblance so much. Like her doppelganger but in a male version.

Ali : Well, that's what we called like mother like son.

Both giggle together.

ALIYA IS A GOOD MOTHER BUT LOST A CHANCE TO BE A MOM

Aliya is one of my favourite female adult character apart from the character which is Dos, Jenny and Dayang. Her characteristic is already showed how great she is as a woman, sister (Bakar's big sister) and mother at the same time.

Since her childhood, she is a kind and strong girl who wants to be a good example to Bakar which made him to be a strong and confident person as now.

Until she meet Niki. She's still the same person who wants to give a hand to Niki to make her life becomes better. She may already be involved in crime along with Niki but, deep in her heart, she just wants to help the whole Pinggiran since no one cares about them.

After being surrounded by MATA Leader Pillars, Aliya seems like beyond her control which is she ready to be caught by them. However, Dayang saw her potential to be an agent if Aliya joins MATA.

Is Aliya accepting Dayang's offer just to be escaped from punishment? Well, I guess she already knew that she was in her wrong path. Stealing and having a crime like in Ejen Ali the Movie even if she has a good intention. So, joining MATA is a good term to fix her life path and give her lesson how to help people in the proper way.

In the other hand, Niki seen Aliya as a traitor as she already hold a grudge toward Cyberaya, a developed and high-tech city unlike her own place, Pinggiran. Because of that, she put Aliya in her hatred list for years until she meet Ali. I believe Niki still loves and cares Aliya as much as she did but, her revengeance kept pushing her.

During Aliya's override mode, Niki witnessed her pain while stopping the rocket but, she did nothing as she feels satisfied because of Aliya's betrayal. However, it isn't Niki's fault 100%. Aliya chosen to sacrifice herself in order to protect her own city because she has her family, (may) her husband and son who are living there.

Niki's emotionally unstable made Aliya realizes it's her fault in the first place. She shouldn't teach Niki to do something wrong. It could be better if they're just to do a right thing and helping together to build up Pinggiran. I think, after Aliya's joining MATA, she is no longer there and she can't visit Pinggiran anymore as she's busy doing mission.

It makes sense why is Pinggiran never change even after Ali visiting there as Aliya's son. Ali came as he found out Niki's earrings have a similar design as his mother's pendrive's design and knowing that later Niki is his mother's former friend.

In Niki's good perspective of Aliya, she described her as a good friend who helps Niki without judging her background or poor life. However, her other perspective with her hatred, Aliya is such a traitor who chosen a stupid organization over her and the whole Pinggiran.

Ali shocked and ended up knowing his mother is actually an agent which is he always thought that his mother is a nurse. So, when the truth was revealed, Aliya isn't a traitor at all. She's joining MATA because she thought the more researches she did, the more things that she can help Pinggiran in the future as she becomes a Techno agent which is she really good at.

The time Niki is going to use herself as a bomb, Ali unconsciously accessed Niki's IRIS Neo and there's Aliya's dimension appeared. Stopping Niki by her own hand from more wrongdoings with a regretful expression. It means, if she failed to stop her from real life world, at least she can stop her in IRIS Dimension. It's the least thing she can do to redeem herself.

ALI'S DECISION AFTER THE INCIDENT OF CYBERAYA

So, how about Ali? Is he okay and ready to forgive Niki about the reason of his mother's death? For me, if Aliya is alive, she may feels it was her fault because she failed to fix everything that change Niki to be a bad person. Ali may takes his time to process everything and decide what he should do in the next step.

Could he continue to be an agent or resign from joining MATA? So, he won't repeat the same mistakes as his mother did in the past?

In the beginning of becoming an agent, Ali is always giving up on something when it's over his limit. However, after the incident of Cyberaya, he changed his mindset that he wants to be like his mother. Changing his life perspective, learn something new and do what he can do. So, he can help people who needs a help.

As conclusion, Ali started accepting his fate. His life is no longer unlucky or bad. He gains his own strength and intelligence in his own way. He's talented, gifted and brave. Everyone may have all of that. However, for Ali, it's more superior than that. He's literally Aliya's son.