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spaceorphan18 · 9 months ago

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The Lady Whistledown Papers : 1x2 - Shock and Delight (Part 1)

Hi! Welcome back to The Lady Whistledown Papers, where I’m taking an in-depth look at Penelope Featherington and Colin Bridgerton’s character arcs and romance within the show Bridgerton!

For previous issues, follow tag : The Lady Whistledown Papers

You know, I've never really paid attention to the episode names until I started going this... Time to shock and delight you. Okay, maybe not shock you. But hopefully delight you! As this episode gives a bit of comedy in the best way!

Condition

Okay, before I get into it, I need to mention that it feels weird seeing actual servants in the Featherington household. I'm used to just seeing Varley and Rae -- and I know them losing money is a plot point later on but I'm kind of curious to watch for when it changes.

In general, though, the first season feels like it was best at trying to be closer to historical accuracy? Look - I love Season 3, and it is by far my favorite, but it is historical fantasy more than anything else.

Anyway, we kick off this episode with the Featherington girls gossiping a bit about Marina's 'condition'. How did they find out? Servants? I don't think Marina actually confided in any of them. And with their lack of knowledge on clear display in this scene (among others) I don't think they worked it out for themselves.

I kind of love the little bit of comedy we get in this scene. Everything from Portia's over-reaction to the situation, Varley's quick little -- 'they know' comment, Lord Featherington (does this dude have a first name, gah, I should google it)'s chill calm down hysterical wife comment, to the Prudence's 'eeww' look during the whole scene.

And then Penelope's startled little 'oh no!' look when Portia claims if they don't knock it off, pregnancy could be catching. Makes me laugh every time. Girl does not want to be pregnant and have babies this very second.

But I mean, in all seriousness, it's really sad how poorly women were educated. They know nothing about sex or babies or anything and while it's use as a source for comedy on the show (there are truly some amazing moments because of this) it does show just how much these women are sheltered.

Two key points for Penelope here, though... A) Gossip queen is gossiping. She wants to know! And I mean, she wants to know because she truly is a curious person and who knows she's not getting the full information that's out there. I love that she wants to know things, and yes, she does like the gossip, but she loves knowledge, too, and I love that about her. B) I want to state right here --- they'll show later in this episode how gossip is key for communication. Penelope knows NOW that Marina is pregnant but chooses to keep that information safe and sacred. Because she has no want or need to really harm Marina in anyway. Another person as Lady Whistledown may not have been so careful with the information.

Accomplishments

I LOVE this little scene. It is great for both Eloise and Penelope -- as it shows off a lot of their characters and character dynamics in a very short scene.

Eloise is going on and on about Daphne and Simon, and how it shouldn't really be a big deal that someone finds someone else attractive. Who cares - there are accomplishments to achieve. We learn a LOT about Eloise - what she values in life, her frustrations with being a woman, and how women can't get anywhere on their own and are forced to be attached to men. It's really her struggle through the whole series -- and why I love her character so much.

(And, as an aside, why I struggle to reconcile the possibility that Eloise is going to have some kind of traditional love match -- let this girl be single and free! Or... something.)

But here's the thing about Eloise -- she goes on and on and on, and I think a lot of the time Penelope is right there with her. But I think for different reasons. Eloise comes from a very stable and loving household. She wants to go see the world and learn about it and achieve things for herself -- but she does so from a desire of extreme independence.

Penelope wants that independence, too, but maybe in a different way, for a different reason. As I mentioned above, Penelope is a very curious person, too, and wants to learn and know things. But she also comes from a very verbally abusive household, that doesn't seem to love her unconditionally. She's also treated like an ugly duckling by the ton in a way that Eloise is not. She yes, she wants to be the same strong, independent woman, too, but she has desires in the way that Eloise doesn't.

She longs for romance and love and acceptance and feels lonely and in all those ways she diverges from Eloise. Their friendship is fantastic, and I love it, but they've come together feeling like outsiders, and ultimately, their goals in life are different, even if they think similarly and enjoy and want similar things in life. It's an interesting contrast that will be the source of friction for the series.

Here's the other thing about Eloise -- (and I say this with all the love for Eloise, because she's one of my favorite characters) -- she loves to talk, but she's terrible at listening. She's (rightfully) indignant about a lot of things, but she pays little attention to what's going on around her.

(I mean. I'll say this right here -- I'm genuinely confused how (other than the plot needed her to be) she didn't pick up that Penelope had feelings for Colin. It is so blatantly obvious all the time. But I mean, one can chalk it up to Eloise being in her own little world and us being more privy to Penelope's inner thoughts. Still...)

Penelope is kind of lost in her own thoughts -- thinking about babies and Marina and confusion over how a thing like it happened. Penelope fills Eloise in on the situation (only lies and claims it a maid). I love the bit of comedy we get in Eloise discussing this -- the little digs at Portia for being old, and then Eloise's utter fear that the 'maid' is unmarried. WHAT IF IT HAPPENED TO THEM!! No doubt, this would be the utter worst for Eloise. She does have accomplishments to acquire.

It's interesting the Penelope is the harder read in this scene. She's worried for Marina. She's worried for herself. She doesn't necessarily seem to enjoy the scandal of it. So, now the two of them need to figure this all out. Pen will eventually go talk to Marina. Eloise as something Pen doesn't have... a family to ask... (for what good that will do.)

Babies

We are back in the Bridgerton drawing room where Colin (and Benedict) are doing what brothers do best and are teasing their sister -- Daphne, for getting so much attention at the ball. No, look, one of the things I adore about this show is that they don't shy away from actual sibling dynamics. The playfulness and antagonistic nature they all have with each other is delightful and real and as someone who has three brothers of her own, this author appreciates it.

I cannot stress this enough -- CLAUDIA. JESSIE. IS. A. GODDAMN. COMEDIC. MASTERMIND. (Another reason she and Nicola work so well together as Eloise and Pen.) Her delivery of -- 'how does a lady come to be with child' and 'I thought one needed to be married. Apparently that's not even a requirement' just gets me every time. I love her bluntness.

Colin has some great background moments, at first snickering at the question and then in shock that Eloise keeps pushing the subject. Again, great sibling dynamics in this scene.

I love that Eloise goes directly to her brothers -- which, again, I love this sibling bit. I have to wonder how many times Eloise did go to her older siblings -- and specifically her older brothers -- to find something out. And I have to wonder if most of the time, her brothers are happy to indulge. Here... it's a bit awkward.

Benedict doesn't even want to acknowledge the conversation. Colin is going to do what he always does -- and makes a joke out of it with the visiting a farm suggestion. (I LOVE Benedict smacking him upside the head -- it's such a brother thing to do then they're being a smartass.)

And I mean - okay, there's the obligatory mature vs immature comment I feel like I should make about Colin here. I do think Season 1 Colin is young, and is immature. He's also the youngest boy out of the initial three, who is prone to making light of situations, especially when his older brothers are often so serious.

But... maturity (or lack of) aside, this is honest to god such a sibling thing. It really doesn't matter how old they all get, Colin will probably continue to make jokes because he can.

I also want to mention, even though Eloise and Benedict are probably closer as siblings, I think Colin is more inclined to help Eloise when he can. He's got a good natured and helpful heart, even if he does it in the most sibling way possible.

THE TAKE OUR STICKS OUT INNUENDO! Honest to god, this moment makes me cackle every time. Colin Bridgerton! Indeed!

I love that Benedict is giggling. I love that Eloise is just so confused. I love that Colin is now intentionally getting under his mother's skin. It's such a funny, little family moment of ridiculousness.

I don't think this show gets enough credit for its moments of comedy, because they have some great comedians on the show.

I hope you enjoyed that bit of levity from Colin - because it's 8 minutes into the episode and that's the last we'll see of him in any kind of meaningful way for the rest of the hour. :P

An Extra

Alright, well, we'll have to go wade in the dramatic side of the pool for a moment with some unhinged Anthony.

The reason I'm even bothering is that we get a mention of Colin and Pen when Anthony is raving about how little it means that Daphne is being 'courted' by Simon. He's trying to claim that without a proposal, what Daphne and Simon are doing in public isn't much of anything. -- Look at Colin dancing around with the Featherington girl. That doesn't mean anything -- it couldn't possibly mean anything, they're just friends. Kinda. Whatever. Daphne - you dancing with Simon is nothing like that!

Lol - Anthony is some day going to have to think over every interaction he's noticed between Colin and Penelope and reevaluate things.

But the point here, it's a nice little Easter Egg. It's nice way of nodding that Daphne and Simon are a little like Colin and Pen, and that Colin and Pen are a little like Daphne and Simon and, yes, we will get to that love story but right now we're in the middle of being dramatic so that'll have to wait a few years.

Anyway... it's a cute little shout out, and a nice stopping place for now... :)

#bridgerton #polin #colin bridgerton #penelope featherington #penelope bridgerton #colin x penelope #polination #the lady whistledown papers

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chlix · 1 year ago

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skz as patrons at the library where i work

Genre: crack Synoposis: literally what it says on the tin lmao Members: OT8!! maknae line below the cut :)

Disclaimer in case my boss sees this that I love my job and almost all of our patrons <3 also none of these statements describe a specific person they’re just amalgamations of things we do and see every day

CHAN:

Mostly comes in to use our wifi/study rooms

Once asked us if we had a spare ethernet cable+hookup and we were all like ummmm we don’t really do that here?

Accumulated a $0.50 fine on his account and was extremely apologetic while paying it off like dude it’s okay it’s not that serious

Needs to print like 150 pages off of his laptop every single week and we feel bad for being annoyed because he’s really very nice about it*

Leaves ten minutes before closing <333

*this is annoying because printing off your own laptop means we have to leave our desk and go get your papers from the wireless printer the back office, whereas if you printed from the library computers you could get it yourself from the public printers

MINHO:

Runs a whole-ass business out of our meeting rooms

Like seriously shouldn’t you have an office space or a building for this….but no he checks out the same room key almost every day like clockwork

Actually doesn’t even live in our township but pays the PLAC fee because he likes our facilities better

Every time he tries to speak to us at the desk and it echoes he goes, “Wow sound really travels in here doesn’t it?”

When you ask him for his name for the financial records he jokingly refuses to tell you because “You should know who I am by now”

CHANGBIN:

Constantly forgets that he has to check out items that are on the holds shelf before leaving

It's such an issue like we've marked more than ten books as missing/lost but it turns out he just took them and left

Regularly attends the adult programming, like book clubs and mental health information sessions, always thanks the presenter for their time <3

Uses the library as Google, will call us and ask “Where’s the cheapest gas station close to where I am?” like sir where are you????

Has a punch card for the coffee machine and will stand around and make small talk while the coffee brews

HYUNJIN:

Gets so unbelievably embarrassed to come up to the desk for any reason as we’re going to verbally berate him for asking us a question

Bitches about every fine no matter how small, will ask for a manager over $0.75.

Seriously he does not like owing money. He got a book wet one time on vacation and paid for it as passive-aggressively as possible

“I’m telling you that the person before me must have done that because I would never treat a book that way, I treat all my books well and I’m one of the most frequent users of the library” like ok sir that'll be $27.99

One of those people that finds weeding atrocious and hates when he sees damaged books in the trash

Constantly complains about how the classics section lacks diversity (he’s right but us circ assistants can’t do anything about it)

JISUNG:

Has about a hundred books checked out on his account and can never remember which ones are next

He has a phone plan with a weird provider so we can’t text him notices and even though we explain this several times he constantly complains that he doesn’t get notices by text

Tries to pay his fines off with Apple Pay and can’t understand why we, a library using a cash register from 2007, do not take Apple Pay

Once used a website that made the computer set off a LOUD ASS ALARM for being a “forbidden or unsafe network” and we were all like what the hell did you do like even porn doesn’t set off an alarm????

Always asks to “use the bathroom really quick” after we’ve officially closed and forces us to stay an extra 20 minutes because we can’t shut anything down until the building is empty

FELIX:

Never actually reserves a meeting room but will always come to the front desk and ask if there’s one available and will be SHOCKED if we’re booked straight through for the day

Regularly brings in books for donation and when he pays fines in cash he always hands us a $20 and says to keep the change <3

Notices every minute change to the layout like “Why are the atlases no longer at the front of nonfiction?” and we’re like when was the last time you even checked out an atlas

Gets embarrassed if a book he wants is in the teen or children’s section and asks us to go get it for him

Can never connect to Libby because he keeps forgetting his PIN number so he calls us to reset it like once a month

SEUNGMIN:

Checks out a TON of DVDs. Treats this place like Netflix fr

Will request we get a movie that’s currently in theaters and we’re like “It’s not even out on disc yet so we literally can’t buy it”

Prefers to hand all his returns to a desk person and watch us check them in while he’s there instead of putting them in the return so he can "make sure" he doesn't get any fines

Asks us why mysteries are shelved separately from all the other books because it’s confusing as to what is and isn’t a mystery (we have no clue either)

Likes picking books off the cart while you’re shelving because they're "peer reviewed" and "probably better than what's on the shelves"

JEONGIN:

Constantly forgets his library card and is forced to come up to the desk so we can check his books out

Does not understand the difference between librarians and circulation assistants and so is always asking circ assistants do work that only librarians can do

“What do you mean you’re not a librarian? Isn’t everyone who works in a library a librarian?”

Thinks literally everything is going to get him banned from the library as if you'd get banned from the library for...using the services we offer?

Got anxious when we entered the room with a giant mallet after he reported one of the tables was stuck and we had to explain we were not going to attack him and we use the mallet to fix stuck tables

Walks away with room keys sometimes and returns them like 30 minutes before we close in an absolute PANIC

#this is the pinnacle of posts that are only funny to me #skz crack #incorrect skz #skz headcanons #skz imagines #bang chan headcanons #lee felix headcanons #lee minho headcanons #seo changbin headcanons #yang jeongin headcanons #hwang hyunjin headcanons #kim seungmin headcanons #han jisung headcanons

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legacyofacat · 6 months ago

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"Summary" Arpeggio Chapter 159

Alright fellas, as promised, 159 go:

We start inside Bismarck, with this girl who I'm pretty sure isn't Berlinetta but who I also remember nothing of. We're gonna call her Bismarck Girl.

(this one)

Bismarck Girl is sitting in a chair and looking at a necklace charm in her hands. She thinks something like "The war was over and the humans were still fighting; what a cruel life. I'm returning to my homeland, Berlinetta."

She then actually speaks aloud and says (DeepL and Google were crying a bit here, so I'm going to piece this together as good as I can): "More than a century has passed since then. Though I must say...", Gunzou is shown here, "Your descendant (s?) has the same eyes as you, Kaoru..."

(Do you remember when Gretel/Admiralty Code went visiting some woman and looked at a framed picture of a young man? That's Kaoru. I don't have a screenshot, sorry.)

Bismarck Girl puts the necklace back on, calling for an "Anneliese".

One of Bismarck's mental models walks into frame from behind her, saying: "I can't believe that you're calling me by my old name. It's an honour."

Bismarck Girl then states that she wants to go home soon and Bismarck agrees.

Scene change:

We see Hibiki (the girl who was I-401's first sonar operator) walking through the base in America, a navy officer calls out to her to talk about an important matter in the gun room. Once there, he hands here a secret message received through quantum communication. Hibiki thinks Repulse sent it, but it's from Hashirajima. She reacts with strongly to the contents of the message and has to sit down, revealing that the message says that Gunzou is alive. The man adds that I-401 was badly damaged but also alive.

Hibiki is so relieved that she cries, then asks who knows about this. He answers that he, Hibiki, the captain, vice admiral and I THINK the communications officer knows.

The translators' results aren't really conclusive for the next page, but I think the navy dude wants to inform the US military, because they don't know that info yet. He also mentions what the translators interpret as "Moby Dick" , but I'm pretty sure is written as "White Whale" (in case this difference becomes important in the future). What he says is something like "I have no intention of telling you this from Moby Dick/White Whale".

(Does anyone know if this is some kind of slang? It sounds like it could be)

He also tells Hibiki that Lt. Kurtz (I think that's U-2501's captain) suggested something to him, maybe the telling, I really don't know.

They further discuss that Japan probably doesn't have this info either and that, should Hibiki disclose the information, he'll follow suit (I'm assuming she to Japan, he to the US).

The Gunzou Is Alive information is then destroyed.

He then hands her another note. It's a message from Gunzou where he apologizes for worrying and tells her that he 's gonna tell her the details when they meet again. Gunzou also asks her to check the US archives for an info concerning WWII in 1945.

Hibiki is like "boy I just learned that you're alive and you throw an investigation at me? *sigh*" and starts heading off. We then see a short flashback of Gunzou inviting Hibiki on board of I-401 back in the day (He essentially does it the exact same way Iona invited Gunzou in the anime ("come aboard me"), btw).

We then see Hibiki in a hallway (of Hakugei 3, I think), lamenting about how troublesome Gunzou is even though it's most likely on accident and that there's nothing she can do about it (I think she also says that she's there (for him) and hopes that he understands that), even calling it a curse.

She then runs off, saying that she "absolutely won't allow it, Gunzou Chihaya".

(I think she refers to not allowing Gunzou to be/feel alone)

And that's Chapter 159. I'm gonna tag these things "Arpeggio summary" so that you can filter for them more easily.

#aoki hagane no arpeggio #arpeggio of blue steel #蒼き鋼のアルペジオ #arpeggio summary #manga #summary

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thesmilingfish · 7 months ago

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I am so ready to leave today. I was going to stay until 11am to help out but thanks to Google Maps I'm going to make the excuse that I have to leave by 10am to make my flight.

This has been the absolute worst work trip of my life.

Firstly, going forward I'm never going anywhere where you can buy oxygen in 7-11.

Secondly, I'm never flying into Denver Airport if I can help it. The information desk isn't staffed but it is under video surveillance 24 hours a day. There are QR codes for you to scan if you want to talk to a person. There are maps but not a single one that says "you are here" to give yourself a reference point. To get to the rental cars you have to take a train and then a shuttle bus. I have to get there super early mostly because it's going to take me ages to get the car turned in and then make my way to TSA (where that's a whole other kettle of fish) before I even start to make my way to the gate. I just made the mistake of checking it out, but my gate is second from the end of the terminal. Maybe I should stop by 7-11 on my way out of town.

I could have dealt with most of this if it wasn't for the store itself that I was sent to help. They have a main store, a clearance outlet and an off-site where they store product. ALL of them are in pretty gnarly condition from the perspective of them having a visit from corporate a week from today. I worked mainly in the off-site trying to get the freight opened and back stocked or pushed to the main store, cleaning up what they had on the shelves and racks so it was organized and the thing I didn't get to but desperately wanted to was to clean. There were no cleaning supplies. Not in the main store, nor in the off-site. The bathrooms, as you can imagine, are disgusting. There isn't even a trash can in the bathroom at the off-site, nor is there hand soap. (At least for some inexplicable reason there was dish soap.)

Me and two guys from another store (they're from a Nevada store) have worked very hard to get the off-site visit ready. Yesterday when we were at lunch, the freight dude from the store brought down 3 racks of boxes and just left them. We came back to find 50+ boxes stacked randomly and just in the middle of aisles. It was infuriating. We all knew at that point that by the time of the visit next week it's going to look exactly how we had found it. We worked a lot slower after that because what was the point?

We didn't even touch the stock room at the main store or help at all at the clearance store.

They are so not ready and I'm afraid that the store manager and the newly minted district manager are going to be in for a shit storm of epic proportions. This week they have 4 people from 3 different states flown in to help. They have the same next week. That's a huge amount of money being spent not only in OT but our flights, rental cars and hotel costs. They're not going to have anything to show for it. On a personal level it makes me so angry because I have a reputation in the company for being very good at my job, which is why I am asked to go help at other stores so frequently. This feels like a slap in the face because I have nothing to show for my efforts.

At least it's almost over.

#personal

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carbomcoco · 10 months ago

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I feel like we gotta start demanding people's information sources more. Unless they're the primary source of the information (like, they're sharing about something they directly experienced), they got the information from somewhere. And if I can't track down what that is, that's immediately a red flag for me. And most of the time it's just annoying little things, like people making up fake origin stories for song lyrics, but sometimes it's big things!

You may have seen a viral tweet claiming that the leader of France said that France has never invaded anyone:

The attached image is just a picture. It's not a video of him saying this. So where did the user get this information? There's basically three options:

1) They were actually there when he said this.

2) They got the information from another source. (Hopefully a credible one, like someone who was actually definitely there when he said this, or a press release or post from Macron's team.)

3) They made it up.

It's probably not #1. This seems to be a random person. It's unlikely that they talk to the President of France very often. They don't seem to be a reporter, and if they were, there would probably be a proper record of that interaction.

It could be #2. But if you do a Google search (or whatever your preferred search provider is), there's no record of him saying this anywhere beyond just this one tweet (which, again, provides no proof that this happened as the attached media is just a photo). But if this is true, they had to get the info from somewhere. So either this random internet stranger has access to information sources that are inaccessible to the general public (i.e. you and me) or...

They probably just straight up made it up. Shocker. And like yeah, it's great that we have "community notes" now on Twitter, but we shouldn't rely fully on them instead of doing our own research. Remember, we're more susceptible to misinformation that makes us scared or mad (Source: American Psychological Society). So if you think "holy shit, that's so bad, I can't believe that", probably a good sign that you should double-check that it's actually true. Yeah, the world sucks, it's gonna be true a lot, but you know what I mean. Make sure we're mad about stuff that actually happened.

And on that note, I think a lot of the misinfo that spreads around here just comes from people saying stuff with their full chest even though it's only a guess or they're just straight up wrong. But even if we're not lying on purpose, it still causes problems! A while back, my favorite guitarist got kicked out of his band and didn't say anything. But noticing his absence when the tour started, fans invented a narrative that he'd temporarily left to help another band and he would be back halfway through the tour, despite neither him nor the band indicating anything of the sort. Clearing all that up wasn't fun for anyone.

I've also seen lots of people claiming that "blood is thicker than water" is actually short for "the blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb". There's literally no indication that this is true. The shorter one has been traced back to the 12th century, and the two books (both published after 1990, hundreds of years later) that claim the longer one is true do not cite their sources. (But also, like, it's just a proverb. It's not a law of the universe. If you disagree with it, you don't have to act like it has a secret historical meaning that a conspiracy theory has covered up. You can just be like "nah". You're allowed to disagree with the 12th century dude. It doesn't mean everyone in the world is misremembering it.)

I've even seen posts inciting outrage about a user getting banned, only to look the user up to find that their account is still there and they have no idea what people are talking about.

Anyway. Point is, we can also stop the spread of misinformation by just not making it in the first place. If you don't have proof that something is true, don't act like it is. If someone else makes a post claiming something they couldn't possibly have insider knowledge of and you don't know where they heard it, dig. If you can't figure out where the info's actually from, and they won't say, red flag.

#long post i am RANTING #STOP LYING TO MEEEEEEEEE

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bookwyrminspiration · 2 years ago

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like i want to draw them SO BAD but i made the mistake of not writing down their appearances so i really only know kihrin is just a white dude but make it ethereal, teraeth has black skin and green eyes (but is it actually like fantasy race black skin and what are his facial features like and does dude have hair an-), and janel has??? dark skin?? and is so buff. or at least if she isn't i'm making it so. i do not know what her hair looks like although i could sess out a face but i DO know the joratese in general are dark-skinned and have facial markings that are similar to horse patterns (which reminds me of vitiligo) and she does have those even if she isn't ethnically? she was raised joratese she is joratese. etc etc. too scared to venture into the tags to see if there is any fanart for fear of spoilers. don't even know where to BEGIN for pulling culture to figure out a general direction of things. deepest pain

A classic a chorus of dragons experience. Don't worry, no one's who read the books knows what anyone looks like really. Except for Skye I think. But I swear most people are fumbling through their imaginings of everyone.

Some books in-depth and repeatedly describe character appearances (like kotlc, where we basically get a new description multiple times a book) and others they will mention the details Once and never again. So you never know if you should've been taking notes until you're in it. A Chorus of Dragons has some good detail when it's there, but it's not there frequently.

I was trying to mentally keep track for art purposes myself, and fun fact! We don't learn Teraeths hair is "sleek" until about 320 pages into book 4! And it is only mentioned that one time!

I do have a better grasp on the main four now thanks to crowdsourcing the information and going back for reference. So to answer just a few of your questions: Teraeth has long, sleek black hair (though several people like to imagine him with locs) and is describes as having angular, handsome features. I'm like 80% certain he has a long straight nose, but I couldn't tell you what page or book that's from. Janel has smooth chestnut skin like a horse, but without markings. She just has the black hands and feet. hair is like a mohawk but long and braided back, sides of her head naturally bald. She also wears a lot of jewelry as a display of masculinity.

Also, not much to worry about with the tags. There isn't an active fandom on tumblr; there's a few people who've read the series who might post about it or interact with a post once in a blue moon, but there is a severe drought of fic and art and all that. You can find a few people with some searching, but most active place is the discord. There's no art posted on tumblr right now, but you can find about 2 pieces if you google it, neither of which are spoilers. There's been a few art pieces in the discord recently though! And once you finish memory of souls you can read the one (1) fic on ao3, as that's set about right after it! Right now the tag is like 99% these asks.

So I think you can see why I'm so thrilled to have a mutual reading it. I swear once a week at least the discord is talking about how badly we want to get others to read the series and how underappreciated it is

but! back to your point! deepest pain </3

#a chorus of dragons #quil's queries #soryasongsaa #long post #also this discord talk is not to like try and entice you into joining. I know you're aware of it already #it's simply. where I talk to people about it so when acod comes up that also comes up in my thoughts #anyway!#i ALSO want to draw them so so bad I literally have had SO MANY portrait and piece ideas both while reading and since reading #my post that's currently breaking containment about wanting to draw was literally about this series #if you look at my og tags #and i think I was complainging to lucas about not being able to draw at the level I wanted for what I was picturing #which. was about this series #this series does something to your brain when you read it man

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salty-dracon · 11 months ago

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"There's a stan account." I tried to stifle my disgust-filled laughter while I scrolled through the Twitter page with Discord open in another tab. "There's a Red Slasher stan account."

The howling laughter of my friends poured through my headphones. We were on a Discord call. One of them, Janet, was an adept Internet sleuth, and when I told her my dad was a former supervillain, she asked for enough information to figure out who it was. I gave whatever information I knew- that he'd stopped about 20 years ago, that he didn't have any superpowers besides a really good sense of smell, that he mainly went after violent criminals- and within an hour she had a name.

Naturally, I was terrified to Google it, but this same friend said she'd give me $30 to do it. And I wasn't the kind of person who turns down a free $30.

"There's an old fancam with old pictures of my dad set to fuckin' Katy Perry." I continued. I watched the video again and again- flashing and edited pictures of my dad- his same face, just younger- surrounded by heart and flower and skull emojis.

"Send me the fancam!" Janet shouted. "Please! I need to see it!"

"No!" I shouted back. "I'm dying of cringe over here! My dad is out here cosplaying a fucking- what is this? Kory, what was the name of that one character from Baldur's Gate 3-"

"Astarion?" Kory asked.

"No. The girl."

"Lae'zel?"

"The other one."

"Shadowheart?"

"Look at this!" I sent a screenshot in the chat. It showed a younger version of my dad wearing skintight black pants and a corset-like tank top that showed off well-toned muscles and pectorals. He was holding a long, thin knife up to the camera.

"He's posing like Lady Gaga. I can't get over this." Kory's deep voice reverberates through my ears. "So, like, is your dad single?"

"No! He's married!" I cover my face. "He's like, 50 now, dude. The age gap is way too strong, man. Like, he does not look this strong anymore."

"Okay well, do you look like-"

"No, I look like my mom. Sorry." I laughed. "The stan account doesn't mention anything about why he quit supervillain stuff."

"Was it because he got married?" Janet asked. "Your dad's a killer. Maybe he wanted to stop."

"Killer?" I repeated to her.

"Yeah, on Wikipedia it says he's credited with killing over 60 people. Just walking up to them in the middle of the street and kidnapping them, then leaving their stabbed bodies for the police to find. It's because he kept posting pictures online of him with his victims that they got these pictures."

"He's 50, right?" Kory's voice sounded jovial. "That's like, one person for every year he's lived. That's crazy, man. That's a lot of people." I heard him laugh again. "It's okay. I can fix him."

A peal of laughter ripped from Janet at that remark- I only heard a few seconds of her laughter before I hit the Disconnect button and took off my headphones.

My dad's a killer. That horrible thought rippled over me like grimy water, tainting me and turning me into one with the muck and smelly rot. What led my dad to be a killer? To kill random people? If that's what my dad is, then what does that make me? What will that make me if I spend any more time around him?

Before I knew it, I started stuffing my clothes into a duffel bag. Then, my documents. My wallet. My laptop. My water bottle. My secret money stash. My cell phone charger.

I have to get out. I have to get out. I have to get out or I'll become a killer like him. Those thoughts pounded through my head uncontrollably, forcing me to stuff the bag more and more and more... before I suddenly bolted out of the house with my duffel bag on my back.

The moment I stepped outside, I felt the cold of night and the fog on my skin. The fog was so thick, I could only see dim glowing where streetlamps were supposed to be.

There was no way I could run away in that kind of weather. Unless I thought of something, I'd need to stay outside until the fog cleared up.

Then, I heard the door open behind me. My dad was standing there, surprised to see me.

"Is everything okay?" He glanced down at me and my pajamas. "Where are you going? Come back inside."

Killer.

I couldn't even muster words. I just shook my head.

"Come on. What are you doing?" he asked. "Are you okay?"

Killer.

I shook my head again.

He sighed. "Can I sit with you, at least?"

Killer.

"Just drop the bag. I promise I won't take it." He motioned for me to drop the bag next to me. That, at least, was a compromise I was willing to make. Because at the very least I could pick it up and run away from him.

He sat down on the steps and faced me. I couldn't see the tension on his face, but I could feel it in his heart. It's not like you to run away in the middle of the night. Something is wrong, but I don't know what.

"What is it?" he asked, his silhouette shifting in the thick fog. "Why are you trying to run away?"

I shook my head. "I just wanna be alone for a bit."

He paused. "Spider in your room again? Someone being mean to you online?" He took a deep breath. "Did... you see something bad?" He twisted his head side to side. "It's that last one. I can tell by the way your scent changed."

Scent. Because you can smell them. Because you smell the people you're about to kill.

"Woah, calm down!" His voice rose into a panic. "What's wrong? What did you see?"

"Dad," I asked, "did you really kill people?"

His expression grew downcast, before he says, "Yes, I did."

"Why?" I asked. "Did it have to do with their scent? Because you could smell their fear?"

"No, not their fear." He shook his head. "It wasn't fear. It was hate. But that's no excuse, right?" I watched him bury his head in his hands. "I still killed all of those people. Because I thought they deserved it. And then, when I began craving attention, people gave it to me because I was a hero to them." He suddenly stood up. "Your mom doesn't know either. And when you were born, I hoped you wouldn't have my sense of smell. I was so, so happy when you were born normal like your mother-"

"Get away from me!" I shouted. I grabbed the bag next to me and ran away into the fog, away from him.

So much thick, dark fog. I could barely find my way. Before I knew it, I'd run into the woods, and I just kept running, ignoring the branches hitting my face.

I could hear him shouting my name, desperation in his voice. But after a while, it stopped. But I kept running and running and running, because my heart and mind would not let me stop.

I was too afraid to consider stopping to listen to his tale.

I was just too afraid...

You always knew you dad used to be a villain, but you really weren’t expecting what you saw when you googled his villain persona.

#pj's shorts #started silly and took a dark (but mostly really sad) turn oops

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catch-me-hello · 2 months ago

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Wild Idol, Episode 10: I get my answers, and they are all NO.

I swear, someone from Wild Idol must know about these recaps, because every issue and suggestion I brought up last time is addressed in this episode. I don’t get the answers I wanted, but I get answers. So let’s dive in.

We open with another clip about animals in the wild, which I’m skipping through. I’ve already made it clear how I feel about this premise.

The show cuts to the panelists. I skip the panelists.

The Tower announces it’s time for the next challenge. HERE we go. Welcome to Episode Ten, everybody!

New coaches approach. We have dance masters Hyoyeon, Minzy (we’ve met her before), and … Woo Young from 2pm! The idols are all excited, and this time I’m right there with them. And we’re getting an actual talent mission – a dance challenge!

The idols are told to put one-minute choreo together in any genre. It’s pouring rain again (it will be raining through this entire episode), and they will be dancing on wet grass as they head out into the field to practice. They practice for hours. We see the sunset. I’m a little bummed that this battle will take place at night because my screenshots come out so dark.

Everyone gathers back at the Tower, where the coaches tell them they will be battling in groups of three. I’m so happy we’re done with the stamina missions. This is what I came here to see.

The winning idol will be able to steal fifty points from one of their opponents, because of course they will, so much for my suggestion that they knock that off. At some point, I want to go back through these episodes and try to figure out who would have been in TAN if no one was allowed to steal points.

The idols are divided into five teams:

Team 1: Taehoon, Changsun, and The Brat Team 2: Jooan, Jaejun, and Baby Hercules Team 3: Gun Wook, Hyunyeop, and Aquaman Team 4: Jiseong, Surfer Dude, and Hyung Seok Team 5: The Cadet, Sunghyuk, and Ki Joong

Team 1 is first, and Taehoon steps up. He’s dancing to a smooth hip-hop R&B song called “Sure Thing” by Miguel. His moves are smooth and confident. He’s always had a sexy edge to him. When the lyrics refer to a cigarette, he puts his fingers to his lips. He becomes the song. One of the judges notes his long arms and legs. He’s a sensual dancer.

The Brat is next, dancing to “Everyone in the World Started to Hate Me” by Lang Lee. The song is just vocal and stand-up bass. The Brat has choreographed a modern interpretive dance. I didn’t expect this from him. It takes courage to do something this different, and he pulls it off.

Now, Changsun. I do know the song. It’s “7 Years” by Lukas Graham. This feels like modern dance influenced by ballet. Again, it’s something more mature than I expected, and I really like it. These idols always find a way to surprise me. I’m surprised again when the coaches give it a poor review, saying he looked nervous. I didn’t see that at all. I think the coaches might be stretching for reasons to eliminate someone, since it’s hard to choose the best performance out of these three.

For this team, the coaches choose Taehoon. I have to agree. As much as I liked the modern dance performances, my favorite was Taehoon’s sensual choreography. Now Taehoon has to choose the one to take fifty points from. I was hoping they’d forget this part. Taehoon chooses The Brat. I think I must really be coming around on this guy because I think his performance was too good for him to deserve that.

Team 2 is next, starting with Hyunyeop. Fun fact about Hyunyeop: When I was Googling more information about the show, I found out that he’s also an independent trainee, not associated with an entertainment company. Just like Jooan. Which makes his history of practicing alone in those rooms sound even lonelier. I’m so glad he and Jooan are going to make it to the final group.

Hyunyeop is dancing to “Reveal” by the Boyz, another K-pop favorite of mine. The song has a heavy beat, and Hyunyeop’s body responds like a percussion instrument. He becomes the beat.

Gun Wook is next, dancing to “Say it Again” by H.E.R. It’s high-energy precision moves you normally see from K-pop groups, set to a low, quiet, slower-paced song. I like the contrast. It’s hypnotic.

Aquaman steps up, dancing to “Bye Felicia” by Masego. It’s an edgy, mysterious-sounding hip-hop song, and he flows with it like water.

The judges love all three and spend more time in discussion than they did with the first group. But the vote is unanimous – Gun Wook. And he takes the fifty points from Hyunyeop, which frustrates the hell out of me, but let’s move on.

Now for Team 3. I love how this challenge is paced, by the way. We’re spending plenty of time with each contestant. I’ll be perfectly happy if this challenge takes up the entire episode and doesn’t end in something like competitive lawn darts.

Hyung Seok is dancing to “Flower” by Johnny Stimson. It’s a sexy, crooning song with lyrics like “Mother Nature made us to intertwine.” He moves seductively, bringing wows from the coaches and other idols. Afterward, the coaches say they saw some awkwardness, but overall they like it. It’s another chance for him to move up from last place.

Now for Surfer Dude. “How I Want Ya” by Hudson Thames is faster-paced hip-hop. He mixes pop & lock moves with smooth slithering. He’s having a blast. He ends with a full-on split. I think he’s the one I’ve had the most fun watching so far. The big finish with the split brings a huge cheer from the other idols. The coaches tell him that so far, he’s the only one who danced for an audience. He danced like a real K-pop idol. Based on their reaction, I think Surfer Dude is going to win this round.

Finally for Team 3, Jiseong is dancing to “Something Good” by Chromeo. He begins by saying, “I’ll show you the power of a high school student.” Wait, he’s in high school?

The panel, who again does not seem to know anything about their own contestants, is stunned. I’m surprised because he looks older and more confident than your average high school student. The panel is surprised because you’re not allowed to have dyed hair in most Korean high schools. I have to laugh at that when I think of kids from American public schools. Jiseong would fit right in.

He's definitely picked a joyful, youthful song, It’s a pure pop dance beat, and he looks like he’s dancing on air. Again, this is just so much fun to watch. I still think Surfer Dude has him beat, though.

The coaches have their discussion. Hyung Seok does get one vote, but the other two are for Jiseong. Surfer Dude didn’t get a single vote. I am seriously blindsided by that. As much as I was pulling for TAN man Jiseong, I was expecting Surfer Dude to win. And he didn’t even get one vote? One of the judges said Surfer Dude didn’t make a strong enough impression. First of all, that’s NOT what you guys said five minutes ago, after his performance. Secondly, ARE YOU KIDDING ME? He did a split in the end!

Surfer Dude is crushed. I’m pissed off. It gets worse when Jiseong takes the fifty points from him. No one cheers or laughs it off this time. I know Jiseong had no choice, but both Hyung Seok and Surfer Dude were already ranked at the bottom. This is kicking someone when he’s down. I really, REALLY hate this. Even the panelists are upset, and I want to yell at them that it’s THEIR show.

Okay. Deep breath. Two more teams to go. Except no. The coaches are announcing the last match. It’s The Cadet, Sunghyuk, and Ki Joong. What happened to the team of Jooan, Jaejun, and Baby H? Are we just going to skip them?

Ki Joong gets a laugh when he steps forward and doesn’t realize that his fly is down. ha ha that’s hilarious what is going on here?

Everyone’s choreography on this team is fine. I’m glaring at the coaches through the screen. Sunghyuk wins. Yay. I thought The Cadet was better, but what do I know? Apparently, I’m supposed to find it normal that one of the teams has vanished into thin air. Sunghyuk takes fifty points from The Cadet, which makes me even madder. Again, the panelists are bummed that he had to take points away. Again, panelists, IT’S YOUR SHOW.

This is because I criticized your show in my last recap, isn’t it? You lost your damn minds when I told you to cancel the last three episodes, and now we can’t have nice things.

Suddenly, everything grinds to a halt. Ki Joong is crying. He says it’s because he hasn’t won an individual challenge his entire time on the show.

I know this must be incredibly frustrating, but I think it’s more than that. He’s ranked near the bottom. He’s spent God knows how many weeks out here in the wilderness, sleeping in a tent, getting rained on constantly, watching other contestants rise through the ranks. He must be exhausted. Cutting him would be an act of mercy at this point.

Everyone gathers at the Tower. The new rankings are announced. We are told that Jaejun stole fifty points from Jooan when he won. Why didn’t we get to see it? This drove me so nuts, I took to Reddit and found out that I wasn’t the only confused viewer. Turns out that when the show was airing, the clip of the battle between our missing three idols was posted as a preview clip to advertise the next episode. If you missed the promo, like many viewers did, you were very confused when the show aired.

I managed to track down the clip on YouTube, without English subtitles. Jooan also dances to “7 Years” by Lukas Graham. It’s a dramatic performance. His expressions are mesmerizing. That’s how he is whenever he performs. It should have been included on the show. Jaejun dances to “Shoot Out” by Monsta X, which makes me VERY happy, and he captures the rock energy of that song. Baby H does very well, even though he isn’t the best dancer. Jooan gets one vote, and Jaejun gets the other two. Jaejun takes the fifty points from Jooan. There is no translation for the coaches’ comments, but they seemed to love all three performances. The entire clip is less than ten minutes. They could have squeezed it in. Or at least mentioned during the show why it wasn’t being aired.

Back to the Tower and the rankings, which of course are not translated for non-Korean speakers. Based on context, it looks like Taehoon is at the Number One spot, way ahead in points.

Now comes the episode’s final mission: the Stage Battle. The winning team will get a chance to perform on an MBS show similar to American Bandstand or Total Request Live. It’s a dream stage for idol trainees.

Only fourteen of them will get a chance to compete for this. Someone has to get eliminated first. It’s the one at the very bottom of the rankings, Hyung Seok.

Honestly, he looks relieved. He’s smiling. He knew this was coming. I hope his next stop is a nice hotel. Everyone hugs him goodbye. He tears off his name tag and leaves it in the grass by the Tower. He thanks everyone, waves goodbye, and leaves.

In his last confessional, he says he has no regrets and that his goal is still to become a star. I searched for information on him. I don’t see any other projects listed for him, but he’s signed to Will Entertainment, and his Instagram page says he’s a writer. Whatever he’s doing, I hope he’s still cancer-free and happy.

The night passes, and morning begins with the Tower again. Our fourteen contestants, now in orange raincoats because it will be raining nonstop all day, are congratulated for making it this far. The Tower explains the setup for the Stage Battle. Our idols will be divided into two teams of seven. They will have 24 hours to finalize a performance for one of two songs on the show’s soundtrack. And now we finally show them the Tower stages. We get day and night shots of it. I love it. It’s a bit cluttered looking, but exciting.

The stage battle will be broadcast live online. There will be two votes, one for the best group and one for the best idol. Everyone on the winning team will get fifty points each and will perform on the TV show.

Now for the songs. The first one is called “Answer.” Choi Young Jun, who has choreographed for Seventeen and Monsta X, has choreographed this piece. The second song is called “No Thanks,” which sounds like a blunt response to the name of the first song. The choreographer for this one is Kasper, who has done choreo for SHINee and EXO.

Now we split the idols into the two groups, and here’s where I had trouble understanding the process. Because of course the Tower doesn’t just choose the two teams and move on. The idols will get to choose which song they want to do. They will choose in order from lowest rank to highest. There’s some rule about someone getting pushed out of a group that I’m not understanding, but the idols are calling it cruel, so I’m sure I’ll be thrilled when I find out.

We see two flags set up with the song names. When an idol chooses a song, he goes and stands in a line next to that flag.

It looks like the first several idols are choosing the song “Answer,” and now I understand the cruel part. It’s just like when they were choosing the Teams A through D earlier. There can only be seven people per team. There’s going to be drama because someone is going to get pushed out when there are too many idols on one team. This seems so easy to solve. When it’s your turn to choose and one team is full, go to the other team.

Also, imagine you wrote the song “No Thanks” and saw that none of the contestants wanted to perform it. But eventually, the No Thanks line does fill up, with just Taehoon left to choose his team. There’s one more spot left on the Answer team, and no more room on the No Thanks team, and now I suddenly understand why Taehoon isn’t just going to take the last available spot. He wants to win, and all the low-ranked idols chose the song “Answer.” He wants to be on the No Thanks team with the top-ranked idols, most of whom are future TAN members.

The Brat and Gun Wook are the only non-TAN members on Team No Thanks, and I’m hoping Taehoon sends one of them over to the Answer team. But no, he kicks out his own future bandmate, Sunghyuk, who does not take it very well. He’s really upset, like Taehoon has just insulted his family name and burned down his house. The Christopher Nolan BWWWWAP on the soundtrack doesn’t help matters. I do get why he’s not taking it well. He was the first one to choose the No Thanks line and start drawing the high-ranked idols to that side, and now he’s the one who has to go to the low-ranked idols side, and THIS SHOW IS JUST MEAN.

This goes on for a while. Sunghyuk is really upset. He says his head hurts. Dude, just go to the other team and plot your revenge. We Americans could teach you a thing or two about that.

Once Team Answer has medicated Sunghyuk and wrestled the dagger out of his hands, the Tower goes back to explaining the rules. Each team must choose a Main Vocalist, a Main Rapper, and the Center. The Center is the visual point person who usually appears in the middle of the group during performances and photo and video shoots. And yes, that is the name of an actual job title in a K-pop group. Hyungwon is the Center for Monsta X. Jungkook is the Center for BTS. I could write a whole manual on the different positions in K-pop groups, so for now, let’s move on.

The teams are ordered to go practice the choreo. Our teams are:

Answer: Hyunyeop, Surfer Dude, The Cadet, Baby H, Ki Joong, Aquaman, and Sunghyuk the Inconsolable.

No Thanks: Most of TAN. Jooan, Taehoon, Jaejun, Changsun, Jiseong, The Brat, and Gun Wook.

Right away, Team Answer is arguing over who gets to be the Second Sub-Vocalist. Yes, that is also a K-pop group position. Then there’s an argument over who gets to be the Center, so Surfer Dude and Ko Joong have a dance battle for it. Ki Joong wins. Now I’m worried that Surfer Dude might need meds. He has lost every single battle over the past several episodes, and now he’s lost the Center position. Somebody call Hyung Seok and see if his cab has already left for the airport. Maybe he can swing by and pick up one more.

We move to the No Thanks team. It’s a given that Jooan will be the Main Vocalist. However, three people want to be the Main Rapper, and of course, one of them is The Brat. Jooan suggests a rap battle. Jiseong wins.

The Brat then channels his frustration into the fight to be the Center. No fewer than six idols participate in a dance battle for the Center position. Jooan and Gun Wook have to decide the winner. It’s a tie between Jaejun and Changsun. They decide that Changsun will be the Main Center, and Jaejun will be the Center during the dance break. I love this team.

Back to Team Answer, as they start practicing the choreo, which is very difficult to learn. They’re kind of all over the place. Finally, Surfer Dude says they need a Leader. (Leader is also a K-pop position, and so is Maknae, which is the youngest member. Being the youngest member of a group is an actual official position.) Anyway, they can’t choose a Leader because they can’t stop fighting.

Finally, Choreographer Choi Young Jun shows up. They show clips of him dancing, and he’s brilliant. It’s like his whole body is double-jointed. I can see why Monsta X worked with him.

The Answer Team tries to show him their progress so far, and he is understandably taken aback. As he works with them, they start to get more frustrated, and it’s just not coming together. Ki Joong is not doing well as the Center. Mr. Choi tries changing the choreo for him, but that’s not working either.

Night falls. These guys have been rehearsing for hours, and they’re still not getting it. Ki Joong hasn’t even learned the lyrics.

Back to Team No Thanks. Changsun is their leader. Things are running smoothly. Choreographer Kasper stops by. They run through the dance, and they are so good. They’re moving as one, completely in sync. They still need more practice, but they are miles ahead of Team Answer.

Kasper is pleasantly surprised. He starts helping them with their formation. When he demonstrates a move, they immediately copy it. They are focused and enthusiastic. This is most of the group that will become TAN, and I already see it. Jaejun is killing it as the Dance Center. The panelists are excited as they watch them improve with every round of practice.

They finally get back to their tents, but both teams can’t sleep. Instead, they are outside in the dark, rainy weather, still practicing. Team No Thanks finally gives in to exhaustion and crawls into their tents while Team Answer keeps practicing as long as they can stay awake.

Cut to the next day. It’s Stage Battle Day. Everyone is sound asleep in their tents. Suddenly, the pounding drums play from the Tower. Jooan instinctively runs out of his tent and heads for the Tower at top speed. When he gets there, he finds one gold flag. Come on, really? I thought we were done with this!

Jooan grabs the flag and is named Winner of the Wake-Up Mission and gets twenty bonus points, because this show is making it clear where they want me to shove my show improvement suggestions.

The rest of the idols have now arrived, and the Tower tells them that with the next challenge, snacks are on the line. Look, can we just give everyone a pack of Hi-Chews and get to the stage already? Nope, the Tower tells them they will have a 7 on 7 … um … cockfight. I swear that’s what the translation says. The team with the last man standing after the cockfight will be the winner. (In America, cockfighting is a highly illegal sport where gamblers make chickens fight to the death, so I am very concerned right now.)

Okay, I did some Googling, at the risk of triggering the police with my search history, and in Korea, cockfighting is a children’s game in which players hop on one leg and try to knock each other over. So no one is going to prison today, and the winning team will get snacks.

Yes, this is how we’re running down the clock in this episode. Not with something exciting, like a tour of the stages, or a soundcheck, or the ten minutes of footage of Jooan, Jaejun and Baby H in the dance battle from earlier. No, this is DEFINITELY more important. Two teams jumping up and down, knocking each other over.

Team No Thanks wins the snacks. Jooan, who knocked most of the other team down singlehandedly, is crazy with joy. The panelists are saying they’ve never seen such a big smile on his face. I say it’s because he’s manic from lack of sleep. Whatever the reason, they get their snacks, WHICH ARE CHICKEN-FLAVORED.

Honestly, the episode should just end on that perfect note. But there’s one more item from my previous recap that the show has not addressed. We get one more look at the stages, and we’re told that the Tower has been moved to the new location. Yes, it is one Tower that they move around. In this shot, I have my answer. The Tower is mostly scaffolding.

Good. Send it to me. I’m not kidding. The next time my upstairs neighbors start blasting music while I’m trying to write, I will switch on that Tower with that deep voice and the LED screens and scare the living hell out of them. I will OWN this neighborhood.

Three more episodes to go, folks ….

#kpop #recaps #TAN #Wild Idol #survival reality shows

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fancoloredglasses · 8 months ago

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Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure (a couple of people traveling through time in a phone booth. Why does that sound familiar?), part 1

[All images are owned by MGM. Please don’t sue me or sic your lion on me]

(all clips are thanks to Fandango unless otherwise specified)

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(Thanks to Rotten Tomatoes)

You would think that a comedy starring two rejects from Dude, Where’s My Car? would be totally lame. You would be wrong.

Don’t get me wrong. Bill & Ted is not a good film, but it is a fun ride that somehow spawned two sequels (one that was released over 3 decades later!) and an animated series (that would see the actors of all three major characters lending their voices)

Enough setup, on to the film! If you would like to watch it, it’s available on Max, Hulu, or behind your favorite paywall.

We open on an introduction from a “future dude” named Rufus (played by comedian George Carlin)

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These two slackers (I would call them stoners, but there’s no evidence of drug use in the film. That’s just how they are) are Bill S. Preston, esq. (played by Alex Winter) and Ted “Theodore” Logan (played by Keanu Reeves, who would go on to play the title character in the John Wick franchise and Neo in the Matrix franchise), collectively known (at least in their minds) as Wyld Stallyns.

Unfortunately, their fantasizing about their someday-to-be awesome band is cut short due to having to go to school.

Later, in history class, Bill and Ted show their teacher, Mr. Ryan, their knowledge of historical figures, such as Joan of Arc.

As the bell rings, Mr. Ryan reminds the class that tomorrow will be a presentation in the auditorium to the entire school of their final report: How would historical figures react to modern times. As the class leaves, Mr. Ryan takes Bill and Ted aside. He informs them that their ability to not fail his class depends on getting an A+ on this final report. And to do so, …

They’re doomed!

After school, as Bill and Ted realize just how screwed they are, they are met by Bill’s stepmother Missy, who graduated high school when Bill was a freshman (wow, Mr. Preston must like ‘em young!) Missy drives Bill & Ted to Ted’s place to get his books so they can start researching their report they have to give tomorrow.

Unfortunately, Ted is greeted by his father, the county Sheriff, who is already in a bad mood due to losing his keys (he accuses Ted of stealing them, but Ted pleads innocence) His dad then informs Ted that he knows about Ted’s grades, and reminds him that should he fail he’d be shipped off to military school in Alaska!

Fast forward about 600 years, where Rufus is summoned by the ruling council.

With that, they give Rufus his time machine (which looks like an old phone booth (as in the kind Superman used to change it. Google it, kids!) and off he goes!

(apparently that’s the way they say good-bye in the future)

Meanwhile in the present, Bill and Ted and TRYING to get their facts straight for their report when Bill’s dad checks in on him…

…and Missy decides to check in on HIM. Mr. Preston then immediately gives Bill and Ted money and shoos them out of the house! Way to help your kid, dude.

Bill and Ted decide to get a snack at the local convenience store (Circle K, since 7-11 didn’t want to pony up enough money to be included in the film when…

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(and NO ONE inside the Circle K thought that was weird? Well, I guess it IS California…)

With that, Future Bill and Ted disappear, and Rufus demonstrates how the time machine works by taking them to 1805, in the middle of Napoleon's eastern offensive toward Russia. Unlike at the Circle K, their arrival did not go unnoticed.

Unfortunately for Napoleon, cannon fire hits his camp, sending him flying from the explosion and he lands on the phone booth as it vanishes.

Back in the present at San Dimas (on Sheriff Logan’s front lawn), Rufus gives Wyld Stallyns instructions on how to use the phone booth (and tells them that even as they travel in time, the time in the present marches on. That closes that loophole, I guess), then departs just as a second (empty) booth arrives. Suddenly…

…Napoleon falls out of the tree he landed in. This gives Bill an idea: collect more historical figures for the report. They draft Ted’s little brother (Deacon) to babysit Napoleon.

Oh, THAT definitely won’t go horribly wrong!

As Bill and Ted prepare to kidnap historical figures for “research”, Ted is stopped by his father, who sends him to his room to pack (don’t forget your thermal underwear!) Then the phone rings. It’s Deputy Van Halen, who claims to have found his keys. Problem is, Sheriff Logan doesn’t know any deputy named Van Halen.

Clever, Bill! This is enough for Sheriff Logan to leave for the county station to get his keys, meaning Ted can sneak out!

[For the kids: “Reach out and touch someone” wasn’t the credo for some pervy celebrity, but rather was the slogan for AT&T back in the 80s]

With that, the boys take a trip to the old west (dressed like that? They’ll be dragged off behind a runaway horse by sundown) and mosey into a saloon where they see…

…Billy the Kid, who’s looking for a couple of men to help him with a gambling scam.

At the poker table, Bill tries to coach Ted on how to gamble. First you need a good poker face.

…which Bill obviously doesn’t have. The other men at the table figure something’s up and pull out their shooting irons. Somehow, they all get away and Bill and Ted convince Billy to join them.

Next stop, ancient Greece. I’m guessing the guys didn’t bring togas.

youtube

With two historical figures in tow, their next stop is 15th century England. Not entirely sure what historical figure they’ll be collecting here.

Billy keeps Socrates occupied while the boys explore.

Then Ted sees the princesses he told himself about.

Not one to step all over his friend’s crush, Bill helps Ted sneak into the castle, where they immediately get sidetracked by the suits of armor on display and…

…well, boys will be boys. After some cosplay fighting, Ted falls down the stairs...where he’s stabbed by the guards! Now how is he gonna meet himself?

Bill immediately charges in to avenge his friend…

…which goes about as well as you’d expect. But then…

Ted turns out to be very much alive, knocking out Bill’s attacker.

Apparently, he fell out of his armor (HOW?!) as he hit the bottom of the stairs.

A bit later…

youtube

Bill and Ted are dragged into the castle courtyard for a good ol’ fashioned beheading when…

They are rescued by Billy and Socrates, who were disguised as the executioners. They then flee into the phone booth (conveniently dragged into the courtyard) and off they go! However…

The guard clipped the booth’s antenna on its way out. Hope that doesn’t cause any issues.

Since Bill was dialing random numbers, they have no idea where they’re going until they land…

The Council recognize the boys and begin playing power chords on air guitars at them. More people come out to continue air guitaring at them. The boys awkwardly give their credo to them (it’s the one Rufus and the Council exchange at the beginning of the film) before returning to the booth.

Meanwhile in the present, Deacon (remember him?) and his friends take Napoleon (remember HIM?) to some sort of party restaurant, where they have a giant sundae.

…and Napoleon makes a giant cochon of himself. (It’s French. Look it up)

Meanwhile, the boys land in Austria at the start of the 20th century and see…

According to Ted’s watch they have plenty of time, so Bill decides to expand on the confines of their assignment for extra credit! They get not only Freud…

…but also Beethoven…

…Joan of Arc…

…Genghis Khan…

…and Abraham Lincoln. Exactly HOW are all of these people fitting in that phone booth?

Ah, THAT’S how!

Back in the present, Deacon (remember him?) and his friends take Napoleon (oh, you get the point!) bowling.

…which goes about as well as you’d expect. Ted’s brother finally tired of babysitting Napoleon and walk out while he’s in mid-tantrum.

Back to our time travelers, the booth is out of control as the antenna finally gives out!

WILL Bill & Ted make it to San Dimas in time?

WILL they pass their history presentation

WHAT will be the result of them monkeying around in time?

WHY can I not reduce my questions to two actual and one joke like I normally do?

These questions and more will be answered in the exciting conclusion!

#bill & ted #keanu reeves #alex winter #george carlin #napoleon #billy the kid #socrates #sigmund freud #beethoven #joan of arc #genghis khan #abraham lincoln #time travel #fan colored glasses #Youtube

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hazeballs · 2 years ago

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Mysteries

A missing pet

A haunted house

A treasure hunt

A secret code

I feel like it goes without saying these critters are like...teenagers?

Honestly I'm giving myself boxcar kids vibes with this idea. Like Critter Nancy Drew.

The Critters

The leader: smart, curious, level-headed - obviously, it's the raccoon because I love raccoons but also they're smart.

The one who's always there and is bfffs with the raccoon, a true ride or die. Is willing to run headfirst into trouble if it means helping the leader - a mouse? It would be cute if it was something small. Okay. Something small, but also tough. Mice aren't really?? Let me Google...a Mole? But does that make it weird because mysteries, moles? Actually. Yes she can be a huge dork in love. Glasses, a bow, the raccoon is always like bro you can't just run towards danger.

The sneaky one who doesn't mind getting dirty looking for the truth - ooooooo a rat? Because it gives the dirty and also shows that even though rats have a bad reputation, this little dude is doing a great job helping and you shouldn't judge a book by its cover. Isn't originally part of the group, but saves the mole from a snake? Cool that tracks. A rat can get a snake.

One of their parents? Look into what animals stay together as a family. I think possums? Raccoons?

Make a map

Make a map to include in the front so people know what the town looks like. Make it with rice like people do for D&D maps. Because that's cute shit. But make it like a kid would make the map.

There needs to be enough places and in a coherent manner

Each of their houses

Their hide out where they keep track of stuff

A grocery store

A park

The outer woods

A school

A bookstore or library? (moles parents work there and they get information from them because they don't think anything if it)

Other places?

An overall series arc?

I need to make a choice. How many books will this be? 3? 4?

It can be a yearly? And either middle school (3 grades) no. High school? So 4 grades and the series can end when they leave for college.

Make the rat the villain in the first one? And at the end of the first one he saves the mole from the actual bad guy, a snake, and the raccoon and mole realize that he'd be a good asset. And in that case there needs to be 3 to begin with and then the rat can round it out as the fourth member.

So the arc. Weird stuff is happening in town. Things are going missing, treasures are being found, but really the graduates just come back to keep up the premise of living in a haunted mystery town. It makes sense in my head.

Hmm maybe. Let me think. The mystery critters start high school, the trio are already friends from previous schooling. They hear from their older siblings about how weird things just happen in town their entire lives and they don't know why. They live for this story about how they live in a haunted town full of mysteries. They go to their first day of classes and everything is normal. They go in the next week and their history teacher is missing. Nobody has heard from him, he just didn't show up. They think it has everything to do with the mystery town. A rat is skulking around. They've never seen him before - but it turns out the history teacher is his uncle and he's worried. The trio doesn't know that yet and thinks the rat is bad news. They do odds and ends and find notes from back in the day about how people just started going missing and they were never heard from again (they're really just going to college and moving) - so they start looking for their history teacher. Eventually they're getting close to finding him and a snake shows up and tries to kill the mole but the rat saves her. Then the rat tells them the teacher is his uncle and how he'd been acting weird before he disappeared and he wants to help.

Book two - the rat uncle is back, but weird. Like different somehow. The quad doesn't understand where he's been but he's been gone and everyone else is just happy to have him back. The quad are all friends and are working on a science project for the science fair and it keeps getting sabatoged. They are just miffed at first but then they start turning on each other. One of them decides to have a stake out to see what's going on. They don't tell the group what they're doing, but in the morning they're found with the destroyed project. The 3 others are appalled that the critter would do this and shun them. The one who fell asleep vows to find who's doing this. I think it should be the raccoon because the mole would be conflicted. So then the mole starts watching the raccoon more closely because how could they just destroy this many years of friendship. The raccoon decides to do another stake out under the cover of darkness and the mole stakes out the raccoon.

I'm getting a little lost right now.

I'll reread this a little later and get it together. I have to do normal errands now

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palidoozy-art · 2 years ago

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EDIT: We've gotten a lot of requests, so I'll have to close this for now, just to make sure I don't overwhelm and hurt someone by inviting 34083048 people in when I can only effectively cycle between two groups of 5. But thank you everyone for your help!

Hey, this is kind of a weird ask, but I'd rather go to here than Reddit or another group finding website first (I like it here better, I like the people here more, and I know I have a cluster of people who like D&D here).

Me and two of my current players (Ellerian and Kelogul, if you were curious) are looking for more people to play with in some one-off sessions. We thought about this back when the whole OneD&D debacle was going on, but we wanted to try looking into some other games with different people.

Current games we're looking into trying just as various one-offs:

Pathfinder 2e

13th Age

Genesys

Shadow of the Demon Lord

Worlds without Number

I'd also like to try running an Out of the Abyss campaign again. I began running one with Kelogul and Ellerian where we went hardcore survival (everyone started naked and you had to find your materials/craft your own stuff/find your own material components) and it was a lot of fun, but we wound up dropping it because I got too busy. One day I'd also like to run Rime of the Frostmaiden as well, and I wouldn't mind running CoS again... but all of that is extremely long-term. There's also joining From the Mist/Into the Horizon as well, but again, I'd like to just try things out with one shots first.

General information about us and how we run things (below the cut, because this is already long enough):

We don't use voice. We could if it's a huge hurdle to get over, but we've been just text based for 3+ years at this point so we're used to it. If you want a kind of example of what that looks like, here's a screenshot of one of our sessions of From the Mists.

We use Foundry VTT. I've already paid for it and you connect to it similar to roll20, so it should involve no extra work on your part. I also already have all the books and a google drive to share them, so there should be no additional costs there. If you need help learning how to use Foundry, we are more than happy to teach.

We tend to be higher on the RP and story side than average, though I'm not sure how much of this would really come across in one-shots where characters are more throw away.

We're located in the CST time zone. The date would likely be on Sunday, as it's the only day other than Saturday we can all get together (and Saturday is when From the Mists/Into the Horizon happens). We're flexible to run anytime from 11 am CST to 11 pm CST.

We are in our late 20s/mid 30s.

We are LGBT+ friendly (I'd hope so, I'm a dude married to a dude)

We've been playing for 3+ years (almost) every week at the same time on Saturday. The only time we've missed sessions have been family tragedies, medical issues, and planned vacations, so between the three of us we're pretty stable and consistent.

In general we're looking for 2-3 additional people (4 players total would be perfect, 5 would be stretching it but I could manage). If there's a lot of interest somehow, I'd also be more than happy to cycle people around so people get a chance to play. I would likely be DMing, but I'm also not hardcore bent on it so if someone else wants to dip their toes in it I'm more than happy to step aside.

If you're interested, message me or send me an ask and I'll give you my discord so we can talk about it. Into the Horizon (legacy campaign of From the Mists/CoS) happens at 5:30 CST, so I'll be busy around then but I'll try to get a response as soon as I can.

Thanks for reading.

#palidoozy rambles #been meaning to ask about this for a while but kept psyching myself out #kelogul and ellerian are really passionate and want to get more passionate people in #and honestly i do too

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eddsworld-the-masquerade · 2 years ago

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a comeback, perhaps?

Yes, really. I’m not joking and I have three points: 1. I’m one inconsistent bitch with a brainrot; 2. I need my delusions and escapism cuz man do four blood-sucking dudes sound more in-reality than whatever the fuck is going on in the actual real world around me rn; 3. I forgot what was the third point. It’s all the more absurd given just in the summer of this year I was certain I wouldn’t come back to it any time soon. What can I say...life do be like that. A fun little story of its own, but I’ll leave it out of this post. For now, let me share with you what I’ve been planning, what’s staying and what’s changing and how I’ll be approaching this AU/blog this time around.

So, to start off...

The 🅱️ has to go:

While still set in Vampire the Masquerade (World of Darkness) universe, the renewed version of this crossover AU won’t have anything to do with Bloodlines video game. Don’t get me wrong, I love Bloodlines still very much, it’s the game with most of my replays and what got me into VtM in the first place. But also, it is restricting, trying to align everything with its small setting/scope and, let’s be honest, doesn’t make much of a sense. Eddsworld’s British, the hell are they all doing in America? XP

The tag is now eddsworld vtm au, without the letter b.

What else gets thrown out?

Plot: Pretty much all of it. I came up with the biggest plot points and am currently rewriting the entire script. At its core it’s still “four dudes tolerate each other’s shenanigans to survive and later learn they kinda don’t feel like chopping each other’s heads off (friendship goals)” but the rest...out the window it goes.

Setting: As I said earlier, it’s weird. So with the help of Fall of London V5 book and some other sources of info on London in VtM, I moved the cast back to where they belong.

Characters and character writing: This one might surprise you, but I really, REALLY don’t like the way I did them back then. I can’t revisit old comics/the demo without cringing so hard my face breaks XD Fishmalk Edd gives me most pain if I’m being honest...

While I’m keeping the basest, the basiesest core (Edd being chaotic bastard Malkavian, Tom being mean and cynical Nosf, Matt being old-fashioned but also a rebel at heart Torrie, and Tord being far less infected with rabies compared to other modern Brujah) I’m changing lots of their characterization, backstories and relationships with each other as well. So don’t expect something you expected from their older versions.

The same goes for every other character, and I’m getting rid of some that don’t serve much purpose anymore.

What’s in store?

New script is in the process. And while it is slowly processing, I will be updating most pages on this blog: specifically “About” and “Characters”, with new relevant information and art. I have archived everything these pages contained, and I’ll put the link to the Google Drive folder up in the “About” page for anyone who wishes to look at the old stuff. I won’t be deleting any of the older posts on the blog though.

Update schedule?

Can’t promise one. Life’s hectic now as hectic can possibly get. I will update once there is an update, but please try to be considerate and don’t ask me “when”. I will most likely go on hiatuses from time to time but I will try to warn in advance if it’s going to take long. Overall, this passion project is just that, a passion project. Not my job. Not something that gives me anything but mental satisfaction. Not even a tip jar. I’m working alone, with occasional help from friends who are kind enough to proof read and brainstorm with me (Nina, Jazz, Engi, Hawa, long live you beautiful human beings). So all I’m asking is some compassion and understanding from all of you u_u If you can do it for me I’m sure it’ll take me longer to lose interest this time XD Ask box stays closed for now, I’ll reopen it once I’ll update all the pages.

That’s it for the moment! Stay tuned, if you’d like!

#eddsworld au #eddsworld VtMB AU #(the last post to have this tag...sob)#eddsworld vtm au

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sixstepsaway · 3 years ago

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i don't even go here but i discovered your ofmd metas earlier today and i've been bingeing. i've got a fun hypothetical! You brought up how izzy's behaviour might change going into season 2 [no longer being comfortable calling Ed on his shit / doing his JOB] and i was wondering if you wanted to spitball ripple effects from that. how do people take that, best and worst case scenario? or even just go into more detail on izzy and trauma responses/triggers. love your stuff! <3

also have you got an a03? i keep finding fragments of work but i can't find a link D:

Oh man, if you love my stuff re: trauma responses and triggers you are going to love my AO3. My longest (unfinished, sadly, though I hope to go back to it soon, now I've found a bit of a groove with my writing) fic is a 86k trauma recovery fic for the Chinese drama The Untamed. My AO3 account is here and the fic with the trauma is 'rites of a widower'. I've received pretty high praise on that fic, actually, for my approach towards trauma, recovery and all of that. It does contain a tw of past sexual assault and violence though!

I'm hoping to post OFMD fic on there soon, I just don't want to commit to more unfinished works, so I'm planning to finish stuff before posting. I have one OFMD fluff on there though! And I'm going to be dumping some Izzy stuff on there soon.

Do you mean by "I don't even go here" that you don't even OFMD? Holy shit if so; high praise, thank you. Or did you mean Tumblr? Either way, thank you for the praise.

Okay, so, in response to your question: ripple effects.

Firstly, Izzy is now disabled. It might not be as bad as a peg leg or a hook for a hand, but it's still going to be a disability and as long as it's a recovering injury he's going to be a) in pain, b) having to tend it regularly, and c) relearning balance and walking and running with a missing toe. I said in response to a different anon that I don't see them going down the "it got infected" path, but that not being a plot doesn't mean it isn't a concern for Izzy-the-Person! It absolutely is! That toe (or, ehm, lack thereof) has to be kept clean, wrapped and protected from the dirt and grime of pirate life. It probably had to be cauterized, as they lack much in the way of medical treatment and idk what else they'd do, so that means there's also a burn to contend with. I might be off base there, though. As I've said before, I'm not a doctor, and I'll google some things but I'm a tad too anxiously nauseous tonight to google how bad a foot bleeds if you chop off the pinkie. (That said, if anyone has any information, please drop it in my ask or a reply or tag me in a post!)

I did google other things though, and google says that you can do just fine without your pinkie toe, but google is also referring to modern day people who have any shoes they need on hand, who have cars and the internet and hospitals. We're talking about a dude who is out on the ocean, cut off from anyone who could be a support system, stranded with the guy who did it to begin with, and having to tend his own wounds. He doesn't even have Roach on board. Ed made him strand the ship's surgeon right after he maimed him.

(Also, speaking of Roach, there is a line in 1x06 when Lucius has his infected finger, where they take Lucius to him for aid, and someone (Fang? Ivan? I don't recall and it isn't the focus here) says, "You're the ship's surgeon too? I thought you were the cook!"

To which Roach shrugs and responds, "Meat is meat."

And that. that right there. is what I call fucking amazing foreshadowing. Roach looking down at a soon-to-be amputated limb and saying, "Meat is meat," in relation to surgery and food. Fuck me.)

So whether it's fine and you'd be fine with a missing pinky or not, Izzy is going to have a lot of changes to adapt to, and he's absolutely not going to have time to be laid up with his foot elevated, or allowed to keep his feet away from the muck on the deck, or anything like that. Nope, he's expected to clean himself up and go find Edward, which is a cruelty in and of itself and implies this behavior will continue: it isn't just over because Ed cut off his toe, Izzy has to deal with it fast and quick, not lay there and cry with pain, and get on with it. There's a real lack of empathy there, like Ed switch-flipped any care for Izzy off (and yet, if that were truly the case, I don't think he would've reacted so strongly, and also I don't think he would've kept Izzy around at all. The point is almost that he cares too much for Izzy, which makes the whole thing even more toxic: "I love you so much I have to hurt you now").

All that to say that first off his behavior will have to change from the confidence he has in his fighting ability until this point. If he needs a cane to walk, then he no longer has both hands free to counterbalance his fencing, his fancy footwork will have to change (there's a lovely video of Con O'Neill practicing his fencing for the duel scene and so much of it is poised footwork). It means he'll be less willing to go into a fight, less willing to duel. He'll be more vulnerable to Jim and/or Frenchie if either of them decide to take him on to deal with what Ed did in basically kidnapping them and also trying to kill the rest of the group.

Then, when it comes to, like, the trauma of it all, I imagine he'll probably have nightmares? Ed broke into a place that was meant to be safe, bringing with him an absolute nightmarish scenario where Izzy woke up to agony and having a piece of himself removed and fed to him. I find it hard to believe he wouldn't have nightmares, and that's even if he sleeps at all after this? The phrase "Sleeping with one eye open" is something Izzy wasn't doing before, because no matter how he feels about the Muppet Comedy Land of the Revenge, he felt safe on that ship. He didn't expect anyone (let alone Ed) to break into his room and assault him.

I don't see him willingly sleeping for a while, and then that means sleep deprivation and that means slower reflexes, yet more vulnerability and less capacity to physically (and mentally) heal.

Another lovely anon suggested the idea of Izzy locking/barricading his door at night, which is a possibility, but as I said to that anon, I don't know if I think Izzy would feel that's an option? What would Ed have done instead if he hadn't managed to get into Izzy's cabin? How much worse could it be, if Ed decided to punish him again and couldn't get the door open? What would the fallout of trying to keep Ed out be?

I don't see Izzy eating or sleeping much for quite a while. Meat would be supremely off-putting, especially any meat with blood still in it. I imagine anything that goes crunch in his mouth would surely cause a trauma response as well, which leaves him with basically soggy porridge or whatever pirates might have. Bread, but crusts can be crunchy, especially if it's stale or older bread.

Which means we're left with food and sleep and his long-time companion all being a trigger. Since he's still in the trauma, he might not even register it until far later, so the triggers might creep up on him out of nowhere after a good chunk of time, maybe even years. If the show doesn't let him be traumatized and genuinely damaged by this, I will assume that's the angle they're going with: delayed response, once he's out of the situation (so, post-canon most likely), and so, probably, C-PTSD. There's no way that he and Ed can heal unless he's allowed to be fucking traumatized by what Ed did and Ed is made to face the god damn music about it and atone for his behavior.

This goes for stranding the crew on an island too, by the way, and killing Lucius (even if he survives the attempt). Ed needs to know he fucked it up and make amends for that. The crew should fear him. Lucius should no longer want to be alone in a room with him, let alone be on the same ship. The people he was praising a day earlier should no longer look at him with stars in their eyes. He should have to earn every last scrap of that back.

Scenarios! I imagine you mean in-world best/worst case scenarios (eg. worst case being "x dies" and best being "x is happy") rather than best/worst case scenarios for plots in the show, but I'm going to answer both.

In-World Best Case Scenario for Izzy:

This is as far as this kind of treatment goes. Ed sees it as "finished" because the punishment was meted out and Izzy has the time and space he needs to heal physically. Ed, at some point, is made to realize what he did, and is forced to atone and re-earn Izzy's trust once he knows he lost it. He manages, because he ends up being deserving of that trust.

Izzy isn't too traumatized because it's just the life of a pirate, isn't it? It's just A Bit Much and he handles it with grace and only minimal bitching.

In-World Worst Case Scenario for Izzy (and the one I prefer because I like watching characters heal, and they can't heal if they aren't hurt to begin with, and it would be a great plot and frankly I might write it):

Izzy is fucked up beyond all reason. He doesn't sleep, he doesn't eat. Fang comments on the fact his clothes look baggy (did he get new ones?) and Izzy flinches with one of Con O'Neill's excellent micro-expressions and then changes the subject.

Jim picks up on the fact Izzy got injured and Ed has gone off the rails. They're the one that also notices they haven't seen Izzy eat in a really long time. They bring him food. Izzy yells. Jim recognizes an angry shell protecting something very damaged and brings more food.

Eventually Jim gets Izzy to admit what happened and Izzy says that he deserved it for what he did. Jim is like, "The fuck did you do?" and Izzy, with complete seriousness, tells Jim exactly what he did to deserve the maiming.

And Jim is just like, "The fuck?" because someone murdered their entire family and left them an orphan and they gave that person a quick death at the end of a knife. Jim is not sadistic, and absolutely tells Izzy that yeah he said some stupid shit, but holy fuck Ed went on a killing and maiming spree because Izzy called him a namby-pamby pining after his boyfriend? What the fuck Edward?

Jim offers Izzy some more food and this time they offer him like, mushroom soup or something, something that's so bafflingly different to a toe that Izzy just starts wolfing it down and Jim produces some like, soggied bread or something, and Izzy eats that too.

Izzy still isn't sleeping though. He opens his door one morning and finds Jim asleep outside his door, leaning against it, on guard.

Izzy sleeps a little.

Ed meanwhile is still full Kraken and everyone is fucking terrified of him, except for Jim who thinks, at this point, that he's a git. Jim floats an idea one day while Izzy is eating another bowl of something non-meaty that maybe they should mutiny against Ed.

Izzy actually gives it a moment of thought before saying no. He's somewhat horrified at himself that he even considered it.

They argue back and forth and finally Jim is like, "For fuck's sake, he maimed you! Look at you! You're a fucking mess, how much do you even sleep? Fuck. We can't keep living like this."

Lingering loyalty and fear of "if you ever threaten me again, I'll feed you the rest" (and no, he doesn't know which voice is louder) means Izzy is absolutely not going to try and overthrow Ed and he's somewhat terrified they're even talking about it, but they hatch a plan to bring the ship somewhere they can leave or at least be on more even keel. Jim is thinking Stede but doesn't say that to Izzy.

Stede is brought in and he has the crew with him and probably Lucius, and when Ed sees Lucius alive he's like "holy fuck" and just shatters because he didn't want Lucius to die, it was just something that happened. He tells Stede all the horrible things he's being doing, including, "I cut off Izzy's toe!" and Stede is like, "Did he deserve it?" and Ed has to realize that no, nope, he did not, and when he tries to go talk to Izzy, Jim is bold and wonderful enough that they block his path, proving their dedication to protecting Izzy: Ed is not getting in that room.

Jim takes the place of Lucius in telling Ed exactly what he's done, though they don't get too into revealing Izzy's trauma. Ed spends a good chunk of time trying to figure out how to re-earn Izzy's trust and make amends for what he did.

Izzy remains traumatized, but once he's in a safer environment he starts to heal from it and be triggered less and less, and maybe manages to forgive and trust Ed again, one day. He never eats meat again and he's no longer really jealous of Stede; he doesn't want Ed in his bedroom anymore, after all.

Show Best Case Scenario:

What Ed did to Izzy (and everyone else) is treated with nothing less than the depth it deserves. Much like the toe scene is not played for laughs, and nor are any more of the Revenge scenes in 1x10 after Lucius is yeeted, what Ed does is treated with sobriety and respect. Izzy is allowed to have feelings about what was done to him, the show acknowledges and addresses that what Ed did is fucked up and Ed is forced by the narrative to see what he did and make amends. No one laughs at Izzy for what was done to him. They do not call him Izzy Limpy or mock him. They do not think he deserved it.

Show Worst Case Scenario:

Everyone thinks Izzy deserved it because he's a dick. It's played off as him getting his just desserts and isn't it funny that Izzy got maimed? Look, he's limping! Izzy Limpy now, instead of Izzy the Spewer haha!! The show focuses entirely (rather than partially, along with the crew and Izzy) on Lucius's murder, whether he survives it or not, and that's the amends that Ed has to make. Izzy stagnates by his side as though nothing ever happened. Sometimes Ed hurts him, but it's framed as something Izzy deserves.

I don't think that's the scenario we're going to get. In 1x06, Ed and Stede were both run through in two separate scenes, in fact Stede even gets skewered to the mast for hours and it's literally fine. No one ever mentions their stabbings again, it doesn't matter, it wasn't a big deal.

If they were going to do that with Izzy's toe, I think they wouldn't have had him limping with a cane, he would've just been fine immediately afterwards. Instead, he immediately has the marks of what Ed did to him:

This first scene is Izzy telling Ivan (who's just like "it's a lotta books, Izzy O.e chiiiiill") with a tang of panic to his voice to work faster because he thinks if they don't, he's going to get punished again. He also has a cane and he does this pained smile when he says "Blackbeard is himself again" and then screams, "QUICKER!!!!!!" in what I can only describe as terror and then limps out, having to use a cane to walk.

When he maroons them, he's still using the cane, and instead of having his foot out of sight below the wood of the rowboat, his injury is on full display. It isn't being immediately brushed aside.

And when he tells Ivan, "Rowwww," there's. something in his voice, I don't know. He's nervous. Who can blame him?

The last time we see him, he doesn't have the cane, I don't think, but he's also on steady footing and his legs are spread to aid his balance.

I do not think his injury will be shrugged off. I hope it won't be. But that's my 'worst case scenario'.

Finally, if they give it enough attention and dedication, Izzy being traumatized and afraid of Ed (his number one supporter, the guy always in his corner, his right hand) will absolutely have an affect on everyone. Even if the crew and Lucius are like, "Meh! We survived!" seeing Izzy flinch or be less confident around Ed will change how they relate to Ed as well.

In 1x04 when Ed is like, "It's a full moon!" and Izzy is the one that chimes in to say he's wrong, Lucius backs Izzy up. Lucius didn't have the guts to speak first and say it wasn't September 1st (who would want to tell Blackbeard he's wrong?!), but he did have the guts to support Izzy. Izzy opened that door by showing that he could inform Ed of his mistake.

Izzy not being able to correct Ed in that scene, for example, would mean they died. End of story. Show ends. They go right into the Spanish vessel because Ed got his dates wrong and no one corrected him, so he and Stede didn't go off to mope about death and Stede didn't mope about his wife and how he was meant to be a lighthouse for his family, and they didn't get the lighthouse idea. Because if they were fine, they didn't need the lighthouse idea.

Izzy saved their lives by telling Edward he was wrong and giving them the time they needed to come up with another plan. Izzy did that.

The ripple effect is that Ed will miss the minutiae and he will not have Izzy there to fix those things. You can, in fact, even see the beginnings of that in that episode via the way Ed doesn't talk to Izzy. He snags Stede, messes around, flirts with the crew, comments on the Bird Guy, tells Lucius to count because he knows the ship is coming, and doesn't tell Izzy the plan.

Izzy has to chase him around the ship, calling his name and trying to get him to come out of the (literal) closet he's in with Stede so they can do actual sailing and pirating things like getting out of dodge real fast, and then after their clothes swap he points out to Edward that Blackbeard needs to do something and Ed is just like "¯\_(ツ)_/¯ that's Blackbeard" and points at Stede

which is hilarious because it all works out, but oh my god, Edward?!

so Izzy is like, "Fucking FINE I'll see if this other bloody captain has a lick of sense!" and drags Stede off to go hey. what about you. do YOU have a fucking plan to SAVE OUR LIVES?

Which, Stede does not lol

and Stede is so busy going OMG ED THIS GUY IS SUCH A DICK! he doesn't realize Izzy is god damn right

and then after all of this, Ed flounces around and shows off like "look how smart I am, I saved our lives by seeing the clouds look like sausages, aren't i amazing" except had he told Izzy why the clouds mattered and his plan, Izzy would have said then and there that it wasn't a full moon and he would have said then and there that they needed a new plan, and they might actually have had time to come up with another plan without having to become a lighthouse (which was great, but a last ditch effort).

Ed doesn't tell Izzy shit and it's his always his god damn downfall.

His downfall is and has continued to be the entire show through: taking Izzy for granted and treating him poorly.

I hope this continues into seasons 2 and beyond.

Thanks for giving me questions to chew on for what feels like 6000 words. I'll do a word count in a second because I think I typed for two hours.

#ofmd #ofmd meta #izzy hands #izzy hands meta #edward teach #edward teach meta #our flag means death #anonymous #ask

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