#Also genuinely if you have such a problem with me then come off anon and talk to me personally?? Like. If this is who I'm thinking then
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thetepes · 2 days ago
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Not to play devils advocate, but I feel like lilys opinion on the usage of the n word is valid. Regardless of someone’s race, I think it’s a little backwards to dictate what someone has to say about another races cultures just because they’re white (or not of that culture), differing opinions aren’t the end of the world and hers wasn’t inherently racist I fear the same goes for the anime thing too, I’m sorry but Japan DOES have of a loli problem, even if her wording was extreme
I’m not white myself (to be fair, not black/japanese either), not that I think it matters to what I can and can’t say about this but I don’t want you to assume I am white because I somewhat defended lily, which is someone I did NOT want to run defense to but maybe I’m too conservative for this space but I mean this in the most respectful way possible, it feels like some of you are reaching on some things just to paint her in a worse light, as if she wasn’t already famously bad 😭
(Feel free to correct me, I’m not trying to be intentionally ignorant for the sake of it I’m just tired of hearing of a lot of echo chambers about the issue without getting to WHY what she says is racist when I think like pretty reasonable??)
Anon, my friend, I do not know how to break this to you, but that is racist. I know you do not mean to be. I know you're trying your best to be as inoffensive as possible. I'm going to do my very best to answer you genuinely because you seem genuine.
Saying Japan has a Loli problem is like saying America has a child pageant problem. It's there. It's a problem, but it's not something floating on the surface everyone in Japan is aware of the magnitude of. It's a niche genre of ero fiction that comes up about as much to your every day Japanese person as child pageants in America.
In the 80's there was this loli boom that took place where it split off from your more typical bishōjo into lolicon. You would find stuff like Future Boy under that genre long before you'd find any ero.
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It wasn't until an otaku named Tsutomu Miyazaki was arrested in the late 80s that the darker side of loli came to the awareness of your every day Japanese person. It was a popular genre so there was a LOT of hentai of it. He killed and murdered several little girls between the ages of I think 3 to 6 and it started a panic very similar to the Satanic Panic that happened in USAmerica. He had a massive collection of anime and hentai. I mean massive. From normal things you'd see in Walmart to stuff you could only buy from very specific websites online no normal person would even know about. It wasn't just Loli that was effected though it was all anime.
It's why Otaku culture was so repressed and shameful for a long time and it even killed the Loli boom because the style was associated with the killings. It wasn't until very recently that Otaku culture made a come back, but still Loli isn't making that come back because of the online opinion on Lolicon. It's gone from an art style to something a lot darker and I think that's where the communication sort of faulters? Because if you say to a Japanese person "you have a loli problem" they're going to think you're having a Satanic Panic moment at them.
At least that's been my experience.
This whole thing is why there was the Moe boom in the 2000's, it was an over correction on the part of artists. Trying desperately to get away from that label and people taking advantage of that as well to make slop.
The rise of the Lolita in Harajuku also muddied the water on this because there's an entire beautiful subculture there that branches into a thousand different expressions. "You have a loli problem!" What's the problem with girls in frilly dresses?
You as someone online, who is adept at being online, in critical spaces and animation/anime spaces have so much more exposure to this stuff than anyone on the daily in Japan.
The entire world has a porn problem. The entire world has a sexualizing little girls problem. To point at Japan and specifically repeatedly deem the entire country as having an issue with pedophilia is racist. To go out of your way to bring it up when you're not even discussing anime or Japan is racist. When your hate and ignorance for a place and it's people bleeds into everything you do
That is racism.
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midnight-bay-if · 2 days ago
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I'm so torn between ROs... Honestly can't decide between S, who seem to be like the greenest of flags here - they're human, and have no ulterior motive (I think?) to pursue the MC, apart from the initial spark of attraction and curiosity. Also their personality seems okay as well, they look like a mature person, someone with whom it is easy to communicate and just be around. Sure, they have their own inner demons, but come on - who doesn't? At least S try to not make their demons everyone else's problem.
But also there is N, who seem a little bit too much for me personally, but, oh, I do want to romance them just to spite Alek.
And also there is Umbra! Umbra, reappearing out of thin air, when they are needed. Umbra, who looks like an encyclopedia illustration of 'ride or die' term. Umbra, who follows us around like a lost puppy. A little bit creepy - in a sexy way - tall, dark, alluring puppy. Somehow the fact they do not realize how attractive they are and how much more they intrigue the MC by trying to keep us at arm's length, makes them even more attractive.
God save multiple save slots 🤣🤣🤣
Also, if there is some kind of petition about making Hunter a LI in the next book, please, sign me in. I really like their personality. They are surprisingly honest and do not try to cover their motives behind pleasantries. Yes, we do not know yet what those motives are, but still. I also love their 'no f***s given' attitude and the fact that they like to get on the MC's nerves a little bit. But at the same time they immediately back off when they see we are genuinely not in the mood. What a beautiful potential for the 'push and pull' relationship dynamic! To annoy each other, first out of spite and mutual irritation, using pet names as an insult, but slowly starting to anticipate this banter, making it flirtier and annoying not each other, but everyone else around... Starting to like each other's stubbornness and edginess... Chief's kiss.
Oh, but also, of you say Hunter is a shitty person, and there is nothing to redeem them, that's all right, too. If they are genuinely a bad person, and want to use our MC for whatever reason, and do not care for us as a person, then we can just ask Umbra to pay them a friendly visit and to (intimidate them to death)... I mean, poop on their porch or something. Like a good puppy they are.
Hi, anon! I’m so glad my evil plan to have everyone fall in love with each of my ROs is working, haha.
But yes, you are right about S being the greenest of green flags, lol. All the ROs have a journey to go through, but S is well in the depths of theirs already and has mostly come through the other side. I wanted at least one RO to be well-adjusted. That isn’t to say they won’t experience struggle in their route, but they will handle it with dignity and maturity.
N is definitely a little full-on, but they can also be good fun to write, at least, haha.
Umbra is a cutie. Definitely MC’s ride-or-die. Umbra came from a really personal place, so I can’t help but have a soft spot for them. They were my guardian angel exactly when I needed them, so now I hand them over to everyone else, too. Just in case.
I’ve been giving it a lot of thought since the discourse started about Hunter. Hunter is not a good person, but I think it will make for a very interesting dynamic if people decide to pursue him. By the time his potential romance comes around, people will be able to make a much more informed decision about him. So, although I couldn’t make him an RO in book one, I think it will work out for the best this way.
Thank you so much for the kind message :) It really means a lot.
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sluttyimpala · 3 months ago
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do not loop in kripke with yourself and other disgusting w*ncest shippers. he did NOT want this or anyone to interpret his work this way. he is not sick like you. do not claim him as a source for your filth
istg y'all just hate fun😭 cant even joke on here anymore. you're not the shipping police, you're just the fun police!!! like besides the obvious of this being insane, you guys cant even take a jokey joke anymore? will you drop dead if you see one? is a one-liner akin to poison in your circles? is it truly THAT serious??? like am i not allowed a chuckle, perhaps even a laugh on my own account😭
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silvheirmane · 6 months ago
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It’s funny how in your rules it states you’ve been stalked or whatever like you and your partner haven’t full blown run off people from the fandom. Get a life. You are not a victim no matter how many times you change your name.
Y'know I wasn't going to answer this and can't imagine who this is from, but genuinely have never had any instance with anyone in the fandom aside from people who were previously called out for harassment and stalking. The fact this is sent in to my bronya of all places makes me think it's from one of them. Also you're coming into my inbox on anon... And I'm the one who needs to get a life.....
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giantkillerjack · 6 months ago
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Your stance on the Dunmeshi queerbait stuff is a bit selfish. Wanting this one manga to go exactly the way you want is a dangerous path - the way you phrase it is so entitled, making it clear it's not about consuming media about lesbians, but making one specific work suit exactly what you want. So many yuri mangas are written by sapphic women. It's a shame your stance is how it is.
And bastardizing the term queerbaiting does no good, either. Neither does the japanese manga market. You should research more before making such hurtful posts.
Hope you have a great day anyway.
[Anon is referring to this post, I believe.]
I mean, one of us certainly IS acting very entitled and weird about the media they like, and it ain't me. Like, I think you just have associated this piece of media with your own identity in an unhealthy way that makes you react to criticism of it with intense defensiveness. You don't own Dungeon Meshi. You aren't Marcille. Dungeon Meshi is NOT a yuri manga; it's a beautiful manga with either sapphic queerbait or a woefully underdeveloped queer relationship at its center.
Maybe if you had an argument besides "it does no good" to criticize it, but you don't. So.
Smh, it's a "dangerous path" - I'm screenshotting that bc I know it'll make my wife laugh. Like, friendo, wanting a piece of media to be better isn't dangerous. But calling someone selfish and hurtful for criticizing media while offering no clarifications as to who I've hurt or how (any fellow sapphics bleeding out in here? Or is it just me with my bonkers-heavy period??)... it's overstepping a social boundary in a bizarre way.
Like, I'm sorry that I'm better at media analysis than you (not actually sorry - I am being petty! :D), but I actually have studied queerbaiting!! I am willing to bet I have done more research than you! (Are you from twitter? You have that vibe. - Again, pettiness.)
... and I spend every day with my wife (the best writer I know; I'm so honored to share stories with her), talking of nothing but our shared special interest all day - i.e. media analysis. (I honestly don't know what neurotypical couples talk about lol)
And I've done enough research to know that one of the side effects of queerbaiting is that fans are often in denial about it and then get REAL MAD when someone points it out. I was there for the Sherlock/Supernatural fandom. Shit was crazy. (Not saying Super-who-lock bc my man Russell Davies was like MAKE THOSE BOYS SMOOCH! 😎)
Also like, my apologies to Ryoko Kui - I really do love Dungeon Meshi - but like, I'm just better at writing and illustrating queer rep than she is. I make real gay protagonists who do gay shit and are gay, and I will never queerbait my audience. Womp womp.
Also, honestly, even if I turn out to be wrong about the queerbaiting by the end of the series, this message was still rude and entitled and weird. We have a lot of issues facing our queer community that endanger real people; someone calling a story queerbaiting mistakenly is not one of them.
#original#also I turned off my anonymous asks because i think you're a little bitch and won't reply if you have to attach it to yourself in any way#dungeon meshi#dunmeshi#queerbait#queerbaiting#queer representation#sapphic representation#gay main character in my graphic novel? check. is the other main character a demisexual panromantic trans man? check.#are there ace characters? check. are there bisexuals and pansexuals and aro characters?? check check and check!!#dunmeshi doesn't NEED romance and i wouldn't mind the lack of gay rep except for all the GAY SHIT THEY PUT IN TO DRAW IN A GAY AUDIENCE#whether or not the intent was malicious it's the result that matters and the result appears to be queerbait#anyone who needs more information can look at the link and read the replies in all the posts but i turned off replies a while ago#eat my ass 🔥🔥🔥#come into MY place of non-work!!! this screened-in porch is for void shouting! down in front goddamn!!!#also turning off anon asks bc i gotta respond to nonsense like this most of the time it is a compulsive thing so I'll just cut off the flow#'selfish'! honestly! LOOK OUT BOIS I'M GONNA KEEP ALL THE DUNGEON MESHI TO MYSELF!!! it's a limited resource!!!!#like sorry you had a very negative emotional response to my criticism but genuinely that is a You Problem bc I was not being cruel to anyon#i wasn't even like. trashing the show. just remarking how entitled other fans get and then this bitch is like#UM EXCUSE ME AS DUNGEON MESHI'S LEGAL REPRESENTATION I OBJECT-- like okay Phoenix Wrong calm down#pisses me off#emotional skill issue#get gud#also me arguing the show should be 'exactly the way i want' would be 5% 'make Farcille canon' and 95% 'MOAR SENSHI PANTY SHOTS' XD#I'm not saying it would make the show better if every other shot of Senshi was lascivious I'm just saying that is the way I'd want it XD#but i AM saying Farcille would make the show better.#queer people CAN queerbait but idk anything about Ms. Kui that ain't my business#I LOVE MY WIFE#i would be open to a coherent argument for the repressed-Marcille reading of things but like. this is not that.
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ms-demeanor · 7 months ago
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You posted about adhd and I was hoping to follow up to clarify something. I’ve explained to my partner a million times about how the borderline-hoarding mess of his space is very mentally draining to me, and he understands but we’ve both essentially accepted he won’t clean his mess because he can’t because of his adhd. You’re saying he’s actually being a shit head?
This isn't necessarily an issue of him being a shithead, but it also isn't a sustainable situation. It's not good for you and there's a level of clutter that's probably not good for him either.
Large bastard is a lot more clutter-y than I am. The solution we've come to is trying to keep our messes at least isolated from one another; he can have his messes and I can have mine, but he can have those messes in his spaces, not all over the place. Sometimes those messes migrate, and that's when it's important for him to make the effort to rein them in rather than trying and failing to make a daily effort to keep our entire shared space tidy.
I think when you say "we've both essentially accepted he won't clean his mess" what I'm hearing is resignation; you're not happy about this but you don't know what to do so you've thrown up your hands and he feels helpless and unsure of what to do to improve the situation. This is the kind of "it's fine" that isn't really fine.
I think it would be worthwhile for you to each separately think about the mess and talk about it together. Are there areas that YOU *need* to have not-messy? Both for utility and your mental health? Are there areas where you can tolerate more mess than otherwise? Are there areas that are going to be harder for him to keep the mess out of than others? Are there things he doesn't *know* about cleaning up the mess?
I'm obviously a big "communication communication communication" person so I'm going to recommend a lot of talking about stuff, which is probably going to mean a lot of thinking about and interrogating stuff. I'm going to say "talk to him about why the mess bothers you" which means you also have to really articulate to yourself why the mess bothers you (for instance I'm not actually *bothered* by a messy kitchen, but I know it's going to reflect badly on us - and me specifically b/c of presumed gender roles - if someone pops by and the kitchen is a disaster, AND a messy kitchen is going to be harder to use). Genuinely, sometimes knowing *why* something is a problem might make it easier for someone with ADHD to do something. And it's not that he doesn't care that it upsets you, it's just that "Oh if I don't wash my breakfast dishes Anon won't have clear counterspace to make lunch" might be stickier in his brain (and less hard to look at emotionally) than "this thing I forget to do upsets my partner so I should do it."
For the record, I think that people with ADHD should read up on Demand Avoidance and see if it might explain some of the issues that they have in their day-to-day life; I've seen some really unfortunate situations with friends where trying to do things that their partner needed became the subject of demand avoidance. *I* have experienced negative outcomes of demand avoidance. The solution to that, however, isn't to stop making attempts to do the thing OR to simply try harder to do as they're asked/told (which reinforces the demand), it's to work on setting up a situation where the partners' needs are not interpreted as a demand. This is fuck-off difficult and requires a lot of patience and care and many attempts to succeed and will be different for each person and relationship.
(Also for the record demand avoidance isn't *super* strongly linked to ADHD and it's not a definitive symptom; like Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria, it is something that occurs in some number of people with ADHD and can be a useful lens through which to examine various behaviors; you don't need to have DA or RSD to have ADHD, and having DA or RSD also doesn't invalidate your diagnosis; they're symptoms. For me, DA often feels like "if I don't look at it, it can't get me" - If I ignore all the messages I've got they aren't real and don't have real consequences so I'll just ignore my texts. If I don't look at the vendor email about the order, the problem with the order isn't real and it won't get added to my task list. If I don't look at the requests in my inbox I can't let people down when I don't do them. It's a self-protective coping mechanism but it's *maladaptive* and I can't just ignore the vendor email or all my texts. I need to work on a way of doing the stuff that I'm avoiding in a way that makes it less stressful and doesn't hurt the people relying on me. That takes a lot of effort, personal insight, trial and error, and )
But before I dive into specifics I want to be really really clear about one thing: sometimes people are simply incompatible. Sometimes one person has such a low tolerance for "mess" and the other person has such a high threshold for "mess" that it can't be reconciled. It sucks that this can end up being a thing that people break up over, but it is MUCH better to acknowledge incompatibility as early as possible instead of spending years and years building resentment.
There used to be a great forum called MiL's Anonymous that I spent a lot of time on. It had a lot of people in a lot of difficult situations struggling to get by and hold their relationships together. The question that was used as a litmus test to approach each situation was simple: If you knew today that everything about living with this person would be the same in five years, would you stay?
Because you can't control your partner. You can't control the future. You can only control yourself and your proximity to situations that are harmful to you. If you knew, 100%, that things wouldn't get better in five years, would you be okay with staying in this relationship? If the answer is "no," then that's that. Don't worry about questions of whether or not your boyfriend is a shithead, start the process of ending the relationship because there's a good chance the situation is going to be exactly the same in five years.
If the answer is "yes," and you'd stay in the relationship regardless of whether or not things changed, then it's time to take actions to improve your life within the context of the relationship.
(No judgement on that yes or no, btw. If you would hate living like this for another five years, and you would feel like you'd wasted your time and hadn't done the things you wanted to with your life, get out. Bail. Go. It will be better for you and better for your partner if you split instead of spending half a decade building resentments and and problems that you'll have to spend another half a decade healing from.)
Also, a note: you describe your boyfriend's mess as borderline hoarding - is the issue *mess* or is the issue *clutter*? I have friends who are very tidy, but whose homes are very cluttered. They like things, they have many things, they keep many things around, but their houses are always clean and well-dusted and orderly, just with a tremendous amount of *stuff.* I am addressing all of this as though the issue is mess, not clutter. If your boyfriend's situation is clutter (the space is busy and packed with things but it is functional and clean) and your issue isn't with *mess* (things out of place, things not having a place, things that need to be cleaned up gathering in stacks, falling behind on regular chores like laundry and dishes and taking out the trash) then you definitely need to assess whether or not you are compatible.
For instance here's a room that is messy but not cluttered compared to a room that is cluttered but not messy:
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That first room is a *mess* but it would be very easy to clean up in under an hour. The second room is fairly tidy, but would take significant effort to pare down and declutter. BOTH of these can be difficult to live with but the second one is not dangerous or threatening to anyone's health. (The second one is QUITE cluttered and if every room in a house looks like this it can be overwhelming to live with; this is actually harder to deal with in a relationship than the first one in a lot of ways. I don't have a lot of advice for what to do if your partner is a high degree of tidy-but-cluttered because I don't actually think it's a problem or wrong to have thousands of books or bins full of lego or a million kitchen appliances as long as you have the space and can keep it safe and well-maintained; this is a really significant compatibility issue)
Okay, all that out of the way, here's the hard work.
Talk about this shit
Talk to your partner and define "mess." Make sure you are on the same page about what you mean when you're talking about what a messy room looks like versus what a tidy room looks like. Gather reference pictures. DRAW reference pictures.
Explain not just that the mess upsets you, but *why* and *how* it upsets you. In this context don't think of it as your boyfriend's mess, think of it as an unpleasant roommate. Discuss this using "I-statements". "When I have to pick up laundry all over the apartment, I feel like a parent more than a partner." "When there are piles of miniatures all over the table, I feel like I don't have anywhere to do things I'm interested in." "When there are dishes in the sink, I feel frustrated because I have to clean before I can feed myself."
Discuss, frankly and openly, whether he knows how to clean. I'm not trying to make excuses for him here but a lot of people with ADHD have a lot of stress and avoidance around cleaning because they spent a lot of time getting yelled at for not knowing how to clean properly.
Discuss your needs, be firm about what you require but willing to compromise. You *need* some spaces to be clean, and some spaces may be harder for him to keep clean than others. It may be MUCH harder for him to keep a bedroom tidy than it is to keep a kitchen tidy; if you need a clean and empty bedroom with everything put away and he simply cannot do that, that is a compatibility issue. But perhaps you need *your* side of the bedroom to be very orderly and can tolerate a moderate level of mess and clutter on his side. Maybe you're really really bothered by a messy kitchen, but it doesn't bug you if the dining table is covered with projects and papers. Figure out something more workable than "his mess goes everywhere and i live with it because he's incapable of cleaning" because he probably is not incapable of cleaning and you deserve to have places in your home that are comfortable for you.
Reduce friction for cleaning
Sometimes the problem isn't cleaning, the problem is the many many steps before cleaning, or not knowing where something should go when you are done cleaning. One of the absolute best things I've done for myself for cleaning my space is getting a broom holder and mounting the broom to the wall. Sweeping is now essentially thoughtless. I don't have to find the broom or pull it out from a pile of fans or go scrounging around for a dustpan it's right there on the wall, frictionless. So here are some ways to reduce the barriers to cleaning:
Make sure you and your partner both know how to use your cleaning supplies and know where those supplies are. When I switched dishwasher soap I had to re-show Large Bastard where I was storing it and how it was used, because to him what happened was the dishwasher tabs just vanished one day and he didn't know what I was putting in the machine or the process I used. He sometimes puts tools away in places that I can't see (he's more than a foot taller than me) so sometimes I can't get started on a maintenance project until he shows me where he put the battery pack for the drill.
Consider making a how-to chart to or having him make a how-to chart to keep someplace accessible so he can reference it while cleaning. Goblin.Tools Magic ToDo is great for this. Basically a lot of the time people with ADHD have trouble knowing what to do from step to step even if they've done something before, so having a step by step guide can make it easier (I have notebooks full of step-by-step guides for everything from paying for my tuition to removing licenses for my customers to weeding my yard)
Remove obstacles; don't keep cleaning chemicals in the garage in a box that's behind a stack of parts, keep them in the room you'll be cleaning. Don't keep the cleaning supplies that you use to clean the bathroom in the kitchen. Sometimes this means buying two bottles of bleach solution and two scrubbers and two sets of cleaning gloves but having fewer steps (fetch the windex, fetch the paper towels, fetch the gloves) is often the key to getting things done (open under-sink cabinet and grab windex, gloves, and paper towels that are there instead of in the kitchen).
This sort of overlaps with the next category, which is:
Create Dump Zones
One thing that I've found that seems very different between people with ADHD cleaning and neurotypical people cleaning is that neurotypical people are good at getting to a point where the cleaning is "done." They have checked off their tasks and they have finished and it is over. There are *SOME* chores that are like this (taking out the trash is a binary state, the trash has been taken out or it has not) and some chores are perpetual (horrid cursed dishes) but I think with people with ADHD, some chores that are binary for neurotypicals are actually perpetual chores. For instance "clean off the counter" is not a one and done for me. "Clean off the counter" may involve a three day reorganization project. "Clean off the counter" does not mean "wipe down the tile and put dishes away" it means assessing whether or not I need to make vegetable stock and bleaching three tea containers and reconsidering whether or not the sharps container should live somewhere else and going through the mail and figuring out what needs to be responded to and taking out the recycling and on and on and on.
We have had company at the house for the last two weeks, so I asked large bastard to clean off the dining room table, which is largely a project zone for him. Cleaning off the dining room table meant putting away his meds (and since he's a transplant patient that involves a 30 gallon rubbermade tote), throwing away some trash, and totally reorganizing his workshop. It also incidentally involved picking up a table from facebook marketplace and moving my plants, which has now involved moving my former plant rack outside (moving buckets, finding and organizing planters and gardening tools) and taking the former table to the thrift store (not done yet) and cleaning the rug that was under the former table. So "either the table is clean, or it isn't" isn't really true for us.
HOWEVER "hang on we can't eat until the table is clear so let's drive to Pico Rivera to get that console table right now" isn't a workable plan, so you create dumpzones as areas of holding between the start and the finish of the chore.
A dump zone can be a laundry basket. It can be a craft bin. It can be a back room or under your bed. It is a place to put things that you are going to deal with later because if you deal with them now it is going to derail the thing you are actually trying to do, which is set the table for dinner.
Dump zones are vital to cleaning with ADHD and I recommend them for day-to-day cleaning as well. The day-to-day dump zones might be more for you than for your boyfriend. For instance, Large Bastard works with bullets and he sheds bullets all over the house. I used to get stressed when I found bullets when I was cleaning because are these work bullets? Are these recreational bullets? Are they in testing? Do they need to be pulled? Do they go in the workshop or the office or the garage or does he need these today so they have to stay on the counter? And the answer now is "that's not my problem naughty bullets go in the jar." Which is perfectly sensible because he gets to say "mystery yarn goes in the bin" and "art supplies go in the bucket."
I feel helpless when cleaning a lot of the time. I'm frustrated and lost and I don't know where stuff goes and everything I pick up spins off into three projects in my head and every step feels like a wall to scale. Dump zones help me with that when there's pressure or a reason for cleaning beyond day to day home maintenance. People are coming over? The bedroom is a dump zone, I'll deal with that later. I'm just cleaning up because I need to? Okay I can find a permanent home for this new dish soap.
AS A VERY IMPORTANT COROLLARY TO THIS:
Active projects do not go in dump zones while you or your partner are cleaning. This may mean designating a project sanctuary area like a corner of the table or one particular chair in your main room where a project can be placed so as not to be disturbed. (if my current crochet project ends up in the yarn bin, that may mean that I don't pick the project up for another three months, it lives on the windowsill behind the couch because that's where it'll get worked on)
Do not put things away for your partner, put them in the dump zone for your partner. Your partner has to be the one to put their own stuff away in a way that works for them. I tend to find that this naturally puts a limit on the time stuff sits in the dump zone, because eventually you'll go "hey where's my thing?" and will put stuff away. If that doesn't happen, it's still generally better to have stuff in a dump zone than all over the home.
Do not decide you know what things go together from your partner's stuff and try to "put like things together." The neurotypical urge to put like things together is the mindkiller(j/k). You do not know which things are "similar" in your partner's organization schema and attempting to organize things on your own is going to end up with all of the things "organized" being functionally lost forever from your partner's perspective. Large Bastard's mom would do this and it was infuriating, she'd say "oh I put all the electronics stuff in one box" and she would mean soldering irons, transistors, ham radios, HDMI cables, and cellphone chargers. We are *still* going through boxes of stuff that she "tidied up" when he was hospitalized in 2020 and 2021.
To prevent the need for quite so many dump zones over time, you can work on setting up landing zones and "homes" for projects and tools.
Landing Zones
Landing zones are places where things go when you come inside from doing various things. Sometimes your landing zone only needs to be a tray for your wallet and keys, sometimes your landing zone needs to be a place to take off muddy boots and put a trowel and gloves down before you shower.
To make an effective landing zone, consider what behaviors you're trying to minimize and whether the people using it are ACTUALLY going to use it. For instance I was tired of the corner of my hearth getting cluttered with random junk so I hung up some hooks and put a shelf and a basket there and it became a really effective landing zone for my bag and keys and the mail, but it was VERY ineffective for Large Bastard because it's by a door that isn't the primary door he uses to enter the house. As a result I always know where my keys and bag are but he has trouble finding his keys and wallet. He tends to enter the house through our bedroom and has an overloaded valet next to the door and that's usually where his wallet ends up. Mounting a shelf to the wall above the valet and putting a basket and a hook on it will be a better place for his stuff to land. It's not that he's not using the first zone because he doesn't know that it's there, or because he doesn't care about lost time when I'm searching for my car keys after he borrows them, he's not using it because it's not by the door he uses. That's all.
I have a landing space for when I come in for gardening that's different than the one when I come in from grocery shopping. I have a landing space for when I walk into the dining room instead of the kitchen when I get home.
Landing spaces prevent stuff from piling up all over the place because they are a limited functional space that should be used frequently. Mail ONLY goes in the landing zone. If you have mystery mail or if you're not sure it's safe to toss, you put it in the landing zone. You can't let the mail get piled up too high or you won't have a space for your keys. You can't let the change in your wallet tray get too deep or your wallet is going to slide off, etc., but you also don't just put change on the coffee table or your nightstand because the landing zone is right there.
Homes for items are just what they sound like. They're the place the item goes. It lives there. My meds live on my nightstand. You would not believe how poorly I did with taking my meds on my vacation because they weren't on my nightstand. A while back large bastard lost one of his sets of sorted meds and we tore the house up looking for them because he couldn't find them in his nightstand, which is where they live. *I* found them in his nightstand because I emptied out the entire top drawer (he had only looked on the top layer) and found them underneath a radio and a hammock. Even though they were *hidden* they were in their home, so they were findable. I recently needed ink for an art class. Art supplies live in a dresser by my desk. Ink lives in the art bin or the top left drawer. The ink was not in either of these places (it was on a cabinet in the dining room behind a teacup) so it took me weeks to find it.
Sometimes the reason that ADHD spaces are so messy is because objects have been assigned homes in places that are visible and if they get moved they get lost. This is a genuinely difficult problem that requires a lot of effort to solve and can involve a lot of trial and error for creating a tidy living space. For some people, open shelving and visible storage might be a good solution. For some people, assigning a VERY clear home and inculcating that location by habit is the only way to clean up a space. For some people one very cluttered corner to at least isolate the chaos does the trick (for me and large bastard open shelving doesn't work because anything in one place for too long becomes invisible; that means that I rely on assigning things homes and large bastard relies on having contained chaos and a general idea of where to search but what that DOES NOT mean is that he is clean or tidy. His spaces look like an explosion. But he can mostly find his stuff and do what he needs to do and as long as that's limited to specific places in shared spaces I can live with it; the dining room table can be a disaster, the kitchen cannot).
People organize things differently. It often takes a while for neurotypical adults to settle into an organizational style that works for them and ADHD adults may need to settle into a new system every few months for it to continue working. The cleanup and declutter is most likely going to be a permanent project that is always going to demand some level of attention from everyone in a shared space, but "my ADHD means I can't do it" is not really going to fly. Maybe his ADHD means that he can't keep his space tidy, but it doesn't mean you can't move stuff from shared spaces into dump zones or that he can't do stuff around the house.
If he's insisting that his ADHD means that he can't clean it is possible that he's not being a shithead, he just feels helpless and doesn't know where to start and has adopted the belief that he's a useless piece of shit who can't even keep a tidy space like a grownup because he's internalized a lot of shitty attitudes (hello, my internal monologue about keeping a clean house). But it's also possible that he's just being a shithead.
It's something that's worthwhile to investigate with him. If he's unwilling to make an attempt, then he's being a shithead.
It is also not your responsibility to rehabilitate another person. If he wants to clean and it's something he feels bad about and needs some help and support with the way that someone might need help or support for learning to use a mobility aid, that is fine but you don't have to be the one who gives him that support if it's detrimental to your health, and you don't have to be the one to teach him that stuff if it's not something you're capable of. And if he is NOT interested in working on making your shared living space more accessible for you, that is not your suitcase to unpack and you just have to ask yourself the question from the start: would I stay with this person if I knew the situation was never going to change?
IDK, I'm sure a lot of this reads like "anon you must take on the emotional labor of training your partner to be an adult" but it's really meant to be more of a way of assessing yourself and your relationship. If you created landing zones do you think he'd use them? Would he get angry if you assigned a laundry basket as a dump zone for his stuff while you tidy the living room? Is living with him long-term going to be comfortable for you if nothing changes? Do you have enough of a shared definition of "mess" that you're at least in the ballpark for what counts as a clean house?
anyway good luck, and a reminder to folks that I'm compiling a bunch of adhd resources and other information on my personal website, ms-demeanor.com. It's coming along slowly but it will eventually include stuff like ADHD cleaning tips and how to tackle a hoard, so maybe keep your eye on that space.
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rafesangelita · 3 months ago
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congrats on 5k! can i get a chocolate chip cookie🍪 for latinakook! reader + ‘alcohol free’ by twice
₊˚⊹ᰔ 𝐚𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐡𝐨𝐥-𝐟𝐫𝐞𝐞
pairing: rafe cameron x latina!kook!reader
summary: ❝did you put a spell on me? just a look to make me yours, all my problems float away.❞ — in which you and rafe hit it off almost immediately.
warnings: rafe and reader are pretty touchy lol, this is the opposite of slowburn, spanish text (it’s all translated!), light fluff
word count: 0.9k
a/n: this song is so cute thank you for this req anon <3 pls don’t hate me i got the lyrics for the summary from the english version. i’m also using this request as a continuation of this fic here!
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weekdays at the country club were quiet and for the most part empty, which made it rafe’s favorite time to go and have a drink without being interrupted or bothered. no one was at the bar, not even the bartender when rafe was taking sips from his mocktail. he had decided a while back to keep away from drinking alcohol when he was having problems. the last thing he wanted was to turn codependent on the substance like some of his peers. rafe stared at his hands, thinking of ways he could get on ward’s good side again.
the door of the club opened, but rafe didn’t care to look back until he heard the click of your heels against the hardwood floor. upon walking in, you had just wanted to check the place out, considering you hadn’t come over here yet since you moved. rafe immediately recognized you from last time he saw you, and concluded that you were even more beautiful close up. “hi..” you smiled, looking around the room awkwardly, ��this place is open, right?” he nodded, waving you over. “está bien, parece que estás disfrutando de tu tiempo a solas— it’s okay, it looks like you’re enjoying your alone time.” just then, the bartender came out from the back.
“i’d really love it if you joined me, i’m just sitting here otherwise.” he hoped you’d say yes and give him a chance to get to know you. finally meeting his eyes, you adjusted the mini purse on your shoulder and obliged. “okay..” you took a seat next to him, your sweet perfume filling up his senses. “order whatever you want.” he offered you a charming smile that made your heart flutter in your chest. “a clean mojito, por favor— please.” you turned your chair so your knees were knocking the side of rafe’s thigh.
“so how come you were parked outside of my house not too long ago?” you laughed, a slight blush creeping onto your cheeks. rafe cleared his throat, the tips of his ears turning pink. “i heard a lot of talk about you around the island, i kinda just wanted to see for myself what the hype was about.” he met your gaze, the bartender placing your drink in front of you. “the hype?” you questioned, “¿qué es eso?— what is that?” rafe swallowed thickly at the sight of your sparkly lips wrapping around your straw.
“it’s just like- how do i say this.. it’s when a lot of people say really good things about something, but in your case everyone was saying good things about you.” you hummed. “really?” you couldn’t help but admire his features, his eyes beaming right into your own. “yeah.. and they were right. you’re gorgeous.” you looked away, not wanting him to see the effect his words had on you. “you’re smooth. how are you here by yourself when you talk like that?” you asked, genuinely wondering how on earth this man was sulking at a bar on a wednesday evening.
rafe got quiet, his smile dropping. “i don’t really like a lot of noise, god knows i hear enough of that at home.” he shook his head. “that’s too bad. i’m pretty loud.” you shrugged. rafe fixed his eyes on you once more. “i didn’t say i disliked all noise..” he scooted closer, placing a hesitant hand on your thigh. you were so easy to talk to, rafe found himself having the most engaging conversation he’s had in a really long time. everytime he made you laugh, he swore it was like he had no more problems, like all the weight had been lifted off of his shoulders.
by this time, you were completely out of your chair, and in rafe’s lap as he traced over the pendant of your necklace. “this is crazy, i’ve never gotten this close to someone in a such a short amount of time..” he looked down at his drink, convinced that there had to be some kind of liquor in there for him to feel so loose and care free. “hey, guys, i hate to sour the mood but the club closes at eight o’clock.. and it’s ten past.” both you and rafe glanced outside the window, the sun already setting. “oh, shit.” rafe took a twenty out of his wallet, placing it on the counter.
“sorry about that, man, we’re out.” you yelped when rafe carried you up, your legs hanging off of his arm. “where are we going?” you laughed, the sound so infectious it made the corner of rafe’s lips quirk. “well, i’m gonna get you home..” you let him place you in the passenger seat of his truck, giggling to yourself as you watched him trip over his feet. “ten cuidado!— be careful!” rafe started up the engine, both of you exchanging a look.
without hesitation, he passed you his phone. “go ahead and put your número in there.” you gasped, taking his cell. “did you just say ‘number’ in spanish?!” you don’t know why but his openness to speak your language, even if it was one word, warmed your heart. “i sure did.” he smiled, watching as your perfectly manicured fingers added yourself to his contacts. “what does ‘mi angelita perfecta ♡’ mean?” your eyebrows raised at his spot on pronunciation. “my perfect little angel!” you chirped. rafe nodded in agreement. he was so done for after this. “yeah, i like that.”
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quantum1mmortality · 11 months ago
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Just read some of your stuff, absolutely BEAUTIFUL I might add. Can you sfw/nsfw headcanons do the Lin Kuei boys with a super social gal? Like she’s all energetic and is HUGE on the PDA? Can she also have big titties? (Totally not self projecting or anything)
Tumblr is still being mean and not letting me edit drafts ugh so this is probably gonna be really bad srry
Tw/cw: afab reader, jealous bi han, toxic bi han? he's his own warning guys, kind of just scenarios and not hcs, still hcs tho I cannot deny you all of that, WRITING THIS AFTER I WROTE EVERYTHING AND I FORGOT THE PDA PART IN BI HANS FORGIVE ME ANON, boobs galore, Kuai being a tit guy, I literally hate this so fucking much
Not proofread fuck you
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bi han
Sfw
Wouldn't admit it, but he finds you adorable.
The way you're the complete opposite of him makes his heart melt.
You practically do all the talking in your relationship while Bi Han silently observes and listens.
When you're out together, he mainly stays beside you as you lead him everywhere.
He finds your ability to quickly make friends amazing, considering he was never able to do that(skill issue).
He can't help but smile when he sees you talk so kindly to everyone, whether you know them or not.
He usually wears his mask when you two are together because of this.
You'd most definitely be the person in the relationship to say "excuse me, he asked for no pickles", mainly because he'd refuse to send his food back because a meal is a meal.
Nsfw
Cool, calm, collected. That's what Bi Han likes to describe himself as. But it's much different when it comes to you.
My god, does this man love tight shirts. It doesn't matter what color, what time of the day, if youre wearing one, he's in the mood.
And he hates how much power you have over him.
He hates when you wear tight clothes in public, too. Mainly because it's extremely hard for him to control himself.
He sees how well you get along with others, how people stare at you with nothing but admiration, and he can't help but feel jealous.
More jealous than he'd like to admit.
Bi Han thinks that he should only be the one staring at you, that he's the only person who can give you the love you deserve.
He'd occasionally see other men staring, looking at your curves and the smile that Bi Han loves so dearly.
He hates the amount of jealousy that pulses through him, clenching his fists tightly as he tries his hardest to keep his composure.
When you get home however, he's showing you just how much he loves you, deserves you, needs you.
He can't help his hands from wandering your body, taking in every curve and relishing in just how beautiful you are.
He'd whisper praise as he kisses and nibbles lightly on your neck, cupping your breasts as a gasp escapes your lips.
You could feel the tent in his pants as he began grinding against your inner thighs, desperately calling out your name as he continues.
His breathing is heavy, fanning your neck as his teeth sank into your shoulder.
A surprised yelp escapes your breath as you can now feel his breath hitting your ear.
"Look what you do to me, you'll have to help me with this, you know."
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Kuai Liang
Sfw
He'd absolutely love seeing you socialize with others.
He'd love the way you can strike up a conversation with anyone and just turn such a bad mood into a light hearted one.
He completely commends your social skills and practically can't go anywhere without you.
Kuai Liang himself would most likely indulge in PDA on his own, so if you initiate, he isn't going to stop you.
He loves holding your hand in public, he loves making people know that he's with you.
He'll also kiss you in public, but not often. Like, at all. He prefers to keep something like that private.
But if you insist, he can't really deny you.
Nsfw
Two words: staring problem.
This man can NOT keep his eyes off you.
Seriously, who decided you can be THAT fine? He genuinely can't stand it.
He's in love with all of your curves, and he LOVES your breasts.
He genuinely can't help wanting to nap on them. Theyre big and soft, can you really blame him?
Kuai Liang would just, touch them. All the time. No warning, he'd walk up to you and just palm them.
Oftentimes, this leads into other things. Kuai is generally just a big fan of titties. Any size, any shape, any color, if you have them, he loves them.
So, he's a professional titty sucker. Willingly.
Kuai genuinely does feel comfort in bringing you pleasure, and if you both get pleasure from doing something, he's all for it.
But if you want to make a night all about him? He's more than excited.
He'd absolutely have you tit fuck him.
He kind of doesn't even get pleasure from the actual feeling, he mainly gets off to how you look during it.
If he was going to be completely honest, seeing you topless and pressing your breasts around his cock is so much more pleasurable than most things.
He'd be a complete mess while watching you, he'd grip the sheets in his hands tightly as he watches his cock disappear and come back through your breasts.
He whimpers as you begin to place kitten licks on his tip, hissing as his grip on the sheets tighten.
Seeing you like this never fails to turn him on quickly, anything that involves you turns him on, but that's not something he'd admit.
"Y/n- please,, let me cum already~"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Tomas
Sfw
Oh my god.
This man would be OBSESSED with you.
You're pretty AND social? He might as well propose immediately.
He's constantly around you, literally never leaving you alone, especially not in public.
If Tomas has to go into a public setting and he can't bring you, he isn't coming.
To him, you're like an emotional support person. You're usually the person who starts conversations for him, and he genuinely doesn't know what he'd do without you.
He loves how kind and naturally nurturing you are, the smiles he sees on other peoples faces simply because of you is something that has made him more happy than he's willing to admit.
Nsfw
STARING PROBLEM but worse.
Tomas is genuinely insufferable when it comes to your body.
Since he practically worships the ground you walk on, he worships your body even more.
If you were to ask him for literally anything, no matter what it is, he'd do it for you, but he has weaknesses.
If you were to ask him for something while batting your eyelashes, he'd simply stop working.
Because of this, sex with him usually results in him being a bottom.
Yeah, I know, it's practically cliche at this point to make Tomas a bottom, but have you SEEN him?
That man is on his knees day and night trying to please you.
He'd usually have you ride him as one hand would be on your waist while the other is firmly holding one of your breasts.
Sometimes he gets too in the moment and holds both of them, but can you really blame him?
Hes entranced to say the least. They're big, soft, warm, how could he not want to hold them constantly?
Even just touching them is enough to get him off.
His head would be thrown back is pleasure as his grip on you tightens, moaning out your name as he bucks his hips upward.
"Shit- hah,, y/n~ I'm so- ngh, close~"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Might disappear and never post again wouldn't that be fucking funny
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sailoryooons · 1 year ago
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Lights | Episode 1 | jjk (m)
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❀ Pairing: Idol!Jungkook x Producer! F. reader
❀ Summary: Meeting Jungkook was a chance of fate. A moment frozen in time, eyes meeting across a room full of lights. The more the two of you advance in your career, the more lost in the lights you become. What if you never find your way back?
❀ Word Count: 15,069 
❀ Genre: Heavy angst, Idolverse, strangers to lovers, eventual smut
❀ Rating: 18+ Minors are strictly prohibited from engaging and reading this content. It contains explicit content and any minors discovered reading or engaging with this work will be blocked immediately. 
❀ Warnings: Discussions of manipulation in the music industry, there are gentle hints at the potential for Jungkook and reader to be addicts, general topics of competitiveness between kids growing up, recreational drinking, references to people using sex as advantage, allusions to topics of promiscuity, recreational drug use (weed), reader’s agent straight up trying to get her to have sexual relations with people, implications of using people, reader is aggressively goal-oriented, Jungkook and reader are a little naive and sort of love-at-first-sighting, explicit language, explicit sexual content, three sex scenes, sex in a public place (restaurant bathroom), oral (m. and f. receiving), spit play, spit in general, light degradation, rough sex, sex under the influence of alcohol (both are able to consent and want it), Jungkook drives after drinking (not implied or referenced that he’s drunk but he is driving after having glasses of wine), nipple play, vaginal fingering, reverse cowgirl, ass play (f. receiving), missionary, fucking from the side, a little bit of come play, voyeurism if you squint, a hint of possessiveness, literally so many bodily fluids like a ton, reader kind of being in something like subspace and being fucked stupid/to sleep basically, aftercare referenced, implied toxic relationships with past coworkers/current coworkers, references to vicious/toxic work industry, light depictions of cocaine use (not explicitly seen) by a side character, honestly Jungkook and reader are a lil cringe in this and moving very fast but they have addictive personalities idk what to tell you, there are hints to their addictive personalities, talk about social anxiety needing medication/alcohol to take the edge off (not good to do people!!!), very light hinting at traits that will be a problem 
❀ Published: October 6, 2023
❀ A/N: This might be the most gratuitous thing I have ever written - it actually might be too much sex? At what point is it too much and just too much come and kissing and the word c*ck, genuinely? Anyway, my goal with this chapter wasn’t so much plot as it was to introduce how volatile these two have the potential to be. If you’ve ever known someone who has struggled with addiction, you will notice the little innocent behaviors that have the potential for utter disaster. These are two people who are wildly native and very much think they are in control of their life, but who are a little reckless. It will seem like they get together fast because they do with like.. Very little regard for anything else. I really hope you enjoy this story. I think it will become sort of a little thing for me to put parts of past traumas I have into it to finally let them go, maybe! Also - I am using the western naming pattern in this with first name last name because of the ambiguity of where this story takes place. ❀ A/N 2: This story was originally named ‘Hiraeth’ but after chatting with a kind anon, I realized that the definition and translation of the word did not fit and lost cultural context from its original meaning and thus changed the title to Lights. Thank you @here2bbtstrash for the loyal beta read and @gimmethatagustd for helping me get VERY unstuck multiple times by letting me talk in circles and offering words of wisdom.
❀ Disclaimer: All members of BTS are faces and name claims for this story. This is entirely a work of fiction and by no means is meant to be a projection, judgment, or representation of real-life people. Any scenarios or representations of the people and places mentioned in works are not representative of real-life scenarios. This series does not attempt to paint a realistic depiction of idols, or the industry, or draw comparisons. None of the scenes or elements in this series in any way reflect how I perceive the music industry and do not represent any opinions. This is not intellectual commentary, it is just straight-up fiction. 
Series Masterlist | Masterlist | Ask | Lights Playlist | Previous Episode | Tag Lists | Next Episode
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Jungkook looks like sin. It’s the first thought you have as you pause at the bottom of the stairs, eyes nearly blinded by the twinkling lights above. But there he is, standing in the glow of flashing purples and pinks, looking right at you.
He’s standing at one of the booths on the far end of the club, which has been rented for an event that you don’t remember the details of. His eyes land on you, and though you’ve never met, you suddenly feel a connection snap into place, something magnetic. For a moment, everything goes quiet, like in those romance books you used to read when you were a teenager.
Before, it used to seem a little silly. You didn’t think it was possible to suddenly see no one else in a room full of people except one person.
Now, it doesn’t seem that preposterous. You’re only able to take in a fraction of information in the second that your eyes connect with his: round face, long, wavy hair, and an arm full of tattoos with a drink held in his hand. 
He is stunning. You already knew that from the other two times you’ve caught a flash of him at events, but every time you see him in person, you’re awed all over again by the effortless way he catches the eye.
The tension between the two of you breaks as someone knocks into you and you stumble, trying not to twist your ankle with the high heels you’re currently wearing. Too short to see over the rest of the crowd, you lose sight of Jungkook. Music comes rushing back to you, the vibration of the base and the hum of synth making it nearly impossible to hear what your agent says next to you.
“What?”
“Do you remember the list I gave you?” Mila demands, grabbing your wrist and pulling you through the crowd. It hurts a little as she drags you along, impatient after arriving at the event late because you had a problem with your wardrobe for the evening. “That list is imperative.” 
“Yes.” 
The list is impossible. You have memorized at least two dozen people that your agent expects you to talk to and rub elbows with tonight. Some of them are certainly doable - people at your own company, artists you’re familiar with. Others are ridiculous, including idols that are several calibers above your station as a newly promoted producer at ILIA. 
Sure, you have the new glow of recent popularity after some surprising award wins and being likable on social media - which matters to your company as much as producing award-winning records - but you know what they all think. You know that they think your parents paid someone or that you fucked your way out of being a junior producer. 
It helps that neither is true. It doesn’t help that you would have done it anyway, if it meant feeding the simmering hunger inside of you that never seems to fade, your desire to win outweighing everything else. 
“You should catch up with your old friend Luna, she should be easy. You trained with her in the early building stages of ILIA.”
“Yeah,” you mutter faintly. “I remember her.”
You remember almost all of them. Something about spending your formative years with a bunch of teenagers being pitted against one another to be the best has made their faces and names permanent. Even the ones who didn’t make the cut or quit on their own.
Quitting is a foreign concept to you. It’s not as foreign as Mila kissing the cheek of some manager at some company you don’t know, pushing you toward them. You don’t care about who he is. There’s nothing he can offer you if he’s not someone who makes music. And as far as you’re concerned, you’re under the careful and powerful tutelage of the Suga. 
Yoongi is a better connection than almost everyone in this building and you know it. 
Suddenly you regret turning down his offer to stay at the studio and work. Yoongi has the agency to say no to scheming agents and public relations teams. He’s already paid his way to be able to do whatever he wants. Specifically, he’s paid in manipulation, blood, sweat, tears, and drama.
You are fresh meat swimming alone in shark-filled waters. Still, you look people in the eye as you shake hands and force smiles all night, going through your mental rolodex of names and achievements. You exchange phone numbers with a few actresses, promising to get drinks. You’re sure they wouldn’t want to if you weren’t fresh off an award-season win. Still, it’s something. 
You spot Jimin in the crowd, feeling relief as you step up toward the series of booths that you spotted Jungkook near earlier. 
“Finally someone tolerable,” Jimin yells when he sees you, tossing back the rest of his champagne. He has kohl smudged around his eyes, making his gaze far more intense as he gives you a once-over. “You look ravishing. Are you sure you don’t want to take me up on the offer to come home with me?”
It would be a lie to say you both haven’t flirted with the idea. There’s something genuine in your friendship, though. Something difficult to find, a twin-flame soul that you’d be hard-pressed to ruin for a bit of publicity. Even if Jimin is the most divine creature you’ve ever laid eyes on. 
It’s out of the question, though. Jimin has become your safehaven in a house of cards world.
Looking him up and down, you let out a long whistle. His hair is freshly dyed bubblegum pink, glittering earrings looped through his ears that scatter the light. Tight black pants with a designer belt and a silk shirt tucked into the waist make him look elegant, the textured Chanel blazer cut perfectly to his narrow frame. 
“Honestly, Mila doesn’t care whether we fuck or not. She still sells that rumor to the press. Doesn’t matter if it’s true. ”
Jimin makes a face at your agent's name. He glances over to where she’s talking up someone from X Entertainment. “She’s a fucking snake.” 
“Well, she’s the snake assigned to me. It’s not like I picked her. As soon as they saw me as marketable, there she was hissing at my door and telling me I have to get in glam to wipe my ass.”
“So bite back. I know you have it in you.” You grimace and reach for a glass of champagne from a tray as it passes you. Jimin sighs as he looks you up and down. “I know you have fangs, little monster.”
You sip the champagne and make a face. It is far too sweet, fizzing on your tongue. “A dragon does not kill the sheep because it feels threatened. It kills when it pleases.”
“My girl. Let’s go around the room, shall we? I want to keep those rumors going.”
With a laugh, you take his hand and let him lead you around the room, passing Mila who grins at you as you go. You try not to leer at her, irritated with her obsession with your relationship with Jimin. When she first noticed that you and Jimin hit it off, she surprised you with an entirely new designer lingerie line. Just because, she had said. A girl should feel powerful and sexy. 
After a few attempts, Mila has finally learned you’re not a dumb little lamb. You’ll take her advice when you want it, but you refuse to let it be at the expense of the single person you trust outside of Yoongi, though Yoongi does not entirely count. As your mentor and senior, he would be horrified to hear you call him a friend. 
After nearly an hour of fake smiles, forced laughter, and far too much champagne, you’re tired and buzzed. You’ve talked to at least ten people on Mila’s long list of celebrities, execs, investors, and influencers that she’s pushed onto you. Another member of that list is standing a few feet away from you, laughing loudly at something Jimin says as she puts her manicured hand on his arm. 
As you contemplate whether or not you should bite the bullet and risk saying hello to Luna, someone behind you says, “She hates you. I think she still holds it against you that you got a producer deal without debuting.” 
Whirling around to identify the voice, you stop short. Jungkook Jeon stares down at you, his eyes just as dark and alluring as they were earlier when you made brief eye contact from across the room. This close, he is taller than you expect. His skin-tight white shirt leaves nothing to the imagination, showing the defined muscles of his stomach and chest, and his perfect, tapered waist. 
It’s a face you’re familiar with, pasted across fashion campaigns and media outlets as he talks about his new single. Your heart is pounding as you drink him in. Soft lips, round cheekbones, and gentle eyes that darken considerably when he watches you look him over.
“Yeah,” you say back, swallowing the rest of your champagne. The carbonation catches you by surprise, making you cough as you swallow the sweet liquid the wrong way. 
He laughs and takes the flute away from you, sticking it on a tray as a server passes by. “Bad swallower?” Instead of answering him, you put one hand on your chest as you cough and the other on his arm, steadying yourself as you lean over and cough, clearing your throat. “Damn, Mozart. You okay?”
“Yeah,” you rasp, feeling your face warm in embarrassment. You remove your hand from his arm and ask, “Mozart?”
“Don’t you do all that composing and shit?”
“I do that producing and shit, yeah.”
“It’s about the same. You’re Min’s prodigy, which means you’re Mozart. And he’s Haydn.” 
“I’m sorry, you know the names of classical composers?”
He smirks. “I know your name.”
“Well, I’m afraid I don’t know yours.” 
It’s a lie. You both know it is, and the grin that spreads across his face is downright devilish as he sticks his hand out. “Jungkook,” he says. You shake his hand, admiring his tattoos. And his fingers. But mostly his tattoos. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.”
“Pleasure is mine.”
“I would love to make that come true.”
You raise a brow. “Is this how most of your conversations go? Telling people that others hate them, name-dropping classical musicians, and making sexual innuendos?”
“Honestly? No, but I am having a great time. I will, however, drop the innuendos if they’re not your style.”
You smile. “I didn’t say that.” 
His answering smile makes your stomach flip.  “Want to get a drink?”
“Depends. Are you going to tell me about all these people who hate me?”
“This is my promise to you that I will only ever be honest with you. So yes.”
You gesture toward the bar. “Lead the way, then.”
Bodies press against you as the two of you snake through the crowd. Jungkook turns a few times to check on you and flashes you a quick smile to reassure him that you’re okay. It’s cute, you think. You don’t know much about him, but you’re impressed thus far. 
And perhaps a little intimidated by his star power and reputation. 
At the bar, the crowd pushes you closer, knocking your arm into his. He steadies you, keeping his hand on your elbow. “What’s your poison?” 
“Vodka soda!” you shout back to him. He nods and leans against the bar, giving your order to the bartender. Jungkook draws attention like moths to a flame, people looking at him and whispering behind manicured hands. “Thank you.”
“Anything for you.”
You narrow your eyes as he waits on the drinks, one elbow propped on the bar, his other hand still on your arm. He bites his bottom lip, staring at you. “One might try and say you have something up your sleeve.”
“Nope, just my heart on my sleeve. You’re cute and I’ve heard nice things about you from Jimin. We grew up together.”
“Wait, really?”
That is a surprise to you. Jimin has never mentioned growing up with Jungkook or being remotely friendly of the sort. You frown as you think about it, wondering if Jimin left it out for a reason or felt that it was an unimportant fact. 
“Mhmm.” Jungkook hands you a drink, the glass already sweating from the humidity of the club. “What, Jimin doesn’t brag about me?”
“We don’t gossip about people in the industry.” 
Carefully, the two of you navigate back toward your section. Jungkook finds an empty booth and slides in, patting the seat next to him. You sit down and lean back, kicking your legs out in front of you and crossing them at the ankle. Your dress is short but remains modest, enough to keep people guessing. You take a sip of your drink, the burn making you hiss.
“I so rarely see you at events,” Jungkook says after a sip of his dark drink. “I’ve wanted to introduce myself for a while and then you came in and it was like we had a moment.”
“You mean you wanted it to be a moment.”
“Maybe I did.” He smiles. “So where have you been hiding?”
“Legend of Zelda isn’t going to play itself. I come to the events I feel like are worth it.”
Actually, you come to whatever Mila drags you to. Jungkook doesn’t need to know how most of your time is spent in a music studio with the caffeine shakes trying to perfect songs to make sure you don’t get tossed out on the street.  
He narrows his eyes. “Tears of the Kingdom?”
“Obviously. I’ve been building weapons of mass destruction for days.” 
Jungkook tilts his head back and laughs. “What other games do you like, Mozart?” 
Talking to Jungkook is a pleasant surprise. He isn’t at all what social media makes him out to be. You find he’s incredibly kind, certainly flirty, but also wildly endearing. You feel a little guilty at assuming his veneer would be thin and made of plastic like the rest. 
It certainly doesn’t feel like you’re talking to someone who went number one on Billboard the week prior. Jungkook doesn’t talk about other people he knows or ask about work. He flits through topics like a curious bird, quizzing your interests, scrunching his nose, and pouting when you say something he doesn’t like. 
It’s cute. He’s cute, and you’d be lying if you said that the longer you sat next to him,  you haven’t started to think about what it would be like to taste him. Even if he moves on the next day like his reputation has led you to believe. 
But… there’s something there. A spark, though perhaps a trick of the lights.
-
“You want me to what?” you ask, lowering your voice as you lean into Mila’s ear. 
A raucous chorus of Happy Birthday is being poorly sung on the dance floor. You hadn’t even realized this event was for someone’s birthday, and you have half a mind to ask who the hell you should be wishing a happy day of birth to, but Mila is bitching you out in front of the building’s restrooms. 
Even tucked away in the hall outside of the bathroom, you speak in hushed tones, worried someone will overhear her scheming. She looks down her beaky nose at you, eyes like an eagle. “Fuck him,” she repeats slowly, drawing out the syllables like you’re a toddler. “He’s into you and it would be great for publicity.”
“I’m sorry, but since when do you dictate my sex life?” 
Not only are you a little too buzzed to have this conversation, but the very implication that your agent thinks she can make you fuck Jungkook is hilarious enough to have you start giggling hysterically. Mila watches you with narrowed eyes as you cover your mouth, laughing behind your hands. 
“You are not a naive little girl,” Mila hisses at you. “He wants to fuck you, so let him. He’s attractive, he has influence, and he’s with one of the big four companies. It would be good press.”
“You and the fucking press, you’re obsessed!” 
“No, I’m right. My job is to be right and to tell you what to do, and right now I’m telling you that Jungkook is already known for sticking his dick in anything he can. He’s been staring at you all night. You’d be doing yourself a favor.”
You take a step back from her and hold up your hand. “If I fuck him, it’s because he’s hot and I want to. Not to play political chess for you, understood?”
“In my experience, you either become interesting or watch your career fade. Your time of being interesting is ticking. Your call. I’m getting out of here. Do what you want, like you always do.”
What Mila says hurts but you refuse to let it show, holding out a hand to gesture the way out of the hall. She walks by you brusquely, sweeping her blunt, black hair over her shoulder as she goes. You stand in the dark, the door to the bathrooms opening and closing, flashing bright light and then leaving you in with colors pulsing in front of you as your eyes try to readjust every few seconds. 
A loud group of girls startle you as they stumble out of the bathroom, laughing raucously. They’re a tangle of legs and heels and sweet-smelling perfume, nearly running you over as they sway, a collective mass of bodies. They look exactly like the women you cut out of magazines and pasted in your journal as a kid, dragging your finger over the pretty dresses and the designer names listed in the captions.
Luna stops short when she sees you, straightening and brushing her freshly dyed silver hair out of her face. She is cherubic and beautiful, her round cheeks flushing naturally and doll mouth always rosebud pink. You feel trepidation as she regards you, the girls in her group hanging back a bit as she assesses you.
“How are you?” she questions, settling on polite while flashing you a pointed smile and holding out her arms. 
Fake. Fake. Fake. Fake.
You feel a flicker of anger at yourself as you let her pull you into a hug, resentful that you must play this game. She smells like vodka and vanilla, and when she pulls away, you see the barest hint of white on her nose. You brush your finger back and forth on your nostril. 
“Oh.” She wipes it off with the back of her hand, giving a short, shallow sniff. “Thanks.”
“You look nice,” you offer stiffly. Your tongue is heavy from drinking and you scramble for compliments to say, even if they aren’t true. “I like your new song.”
“Thanks! I have the best producers and writers available out there. They really know exactly what they’re doing.” 
You feel the strain in your smile tighten. Moves and counter moves. “That’s good.”
“My team is great. I’m so thankful I had the opportunity to be with S3vn.”
Luna’s voice is polite. Happy, even. But you hear the double meaning in her words. Remember the way she cut your hair before a major review day when you were sixteen. She’s become better at being mean in a nice way. And you have become better at being unaffected, knowing it is her least favorite response.
“It’s nice to see you, Luna.”
Her smile drops when you don’t get upset. You turn and leave the hallway, palms sweaty and head spinning. Swallowing thickly, you wipe your hands on your exposed thighs and walk back to where Jungkook is sitting, surprised to see Jimin has joined him. He narrows his eyes as you approach, but his expression is overall unreadable.
You sit back down silently on the other side of Jimin, staring off into space. The room feels like it’s spinning. You’re toeing the line of buzzed and drunk, so you sip some water, letting yourself go silent as you absently stare into the crowd, watching the cascading lights, a little lost in them.
Jimin waves his hand back and forth in front of your face. “Are you listening?”
You blink a few times, turning to see him and Jungkook looking at you. “What?”
“Jungkook invited us to an after-party. J-Hope is having some people over.”
“Oh.” 
Chewing on your lip, you let your eyes drift to Jungkook. He gives you a tentative smile, nodding his head in encouragement.
“You should come,” Jungkook encourages with a coy grin. “I’d have fun with you there.”
“Do you want to go?” you ask Jimin quietly, looking back at him. He still has a vague expression, one you can’t figure out. “I’ll only go if you do.” 
“Sure,” he offers. “What’s the worst that could happen?”
-
“So you’re Yoongi’s prodigy? No shit!” Hoseok asks, looking at you from the front seat of the van. City lights blur on the other side of the window and it’s hard to hear him over the screeching singing in the car and the blaring music. “You’re about as hard to meet as Yoongi is!” 
J-Hope - Hoseok, as he has asked you to call him - gives you a bright smile. You just stare at him, shocked that he has any idea who you are. You make a mental note to thank Yoongi for even mentioning your name to him. Hoseok is an absolute powerhouse and someone you’ve followed for years. It’s a good connection.
“Told you that you’d want to meet her,” Jungkook says, voice deep. 
Jungkook’s body presses against yours in the packed-tight vehicle. His hand is on top of your knee. His cologne smells like amber and sandalwood, making your eyelashes flutter as you breathe in. You lay your head back against the headrest of the seat, letting it roll to the side a little to test his reaction when you place your head on his shoulder.
He turns his head toward you, his breath fanning against your forehead. You smell his mint gum. If you look up at him right now, your mouths would be close enough to kiss. “Hi,” he says softly. 
“Hi.”
“You have pretty eyes.”
“I grew them myself.”
Jungkook’s laughter is abrupt. You grin at his mirth. He has a cute laugh, totally at odds with the edgy tattoos and the way he carries himself. The paradox intrigues you.
“That wasn’t very smooth, was it?” 
He shakes his head. “It’s honest. I like it. Your reactions are probably the most genuine thing I’ve seen all night. I like genuine.” 
“There’s not a lot of that to go around.”
“I know. That’s why I’m glad we locked eyes from across the room.”
You roll your eyes. “Okay, The Lonely Island.”
Hoseok lives in a luxurious apartment on the east side of the city. The entrance is private in a parking garage, away from wandering eyes. Everyone piles out of the car and when you slide to exit, you find a tattooed hand waiting to help you out.
Grinning, you take Jungkook’s hand. Your fingers tingle where they’re interlocked with his, warmth spreading across your palms. Once you’re out of the car, you start to let go. Jungkook squeezes his fingers tighter, urging you to look up at him. There’s a question in his eyes, gaze flicking down to where your hands are clasped. 
A small grin lights up your face and you squeeze his hand back. He leads you toward the elevator, swinging your hands back and forth. You know this game well: Jungkook is priming you. The hand-holding, the compliments, and the staying near you all night are all his signals to you that he wants you to go home with him.
You want that too, but you also don’t want it to come easy. It’s a risk to make him work harder for it, but you want to see if he will.. 
“Cute,” Jimin mutters, raising a brow as he walks next to you. 
Hoseok’s apartment is a dream. It makes sense for someone with as many writing and choreography credits across the industry as him, in addition to having two top charting albums, a clothing partnership with a popular designer, and countless brand endorsements. 
It’s much nicer than the small but flashy apartment ILIA has put you in. Where your apartment feels like a model home that you can’t leave fingerprints in, Hoseok’s feels authentic. There are hand-selected pieces of art on his walls, a towering bookcase of awards and plaques, blankets and pillows thrown over the couches, books and video game controllers on the coffee table.
Someone gets control of the speaker system and starts pumping hip-hop through the two-story apartment. You navigate to the kitchen where you run into Hwasa pouring drinks. She screams when she sees you, abandoning her bartender duties and making everyone in the kitchen flinch and turn in your direction. You let go of Jungkook’s hand, casting your arms open.
“Helllooooo?!” She grips you tight, kissing your forehead and both cheeks. You laugh, immediately feeling yourself relax having seen a familiar face. The greeting is a little more than you expect, but she’s drunk and happy. You take it in stride. “I cannot believe you’re here and with… well isn’t that new?” 
“Hello, Hwasa.”
“Jeon,” she greets, narrowing her eyes. She tucks you into her arm, pointing a finger at Jungkook. “You better not fuck with this girl, understand me? She is way too cool for your bullshit.”
He rolls his eyes. “What bullshit?”
“I’m so serious. I like her.”
Hwasa lets you go and laughs it off, giving Jungkook a quick kiss on the cheek before going back to her drink-making. Jimin is nowhere in sight, having drifted off to a corner of the living room to chat with Hoseok, leaving you with Jungkook. 
Jungkook scratches the back of his neck awkwardly. “Sorry about that,” he ventures.
“It happens.”
“Still awkward.” 
“It is,” you snark. You bring your fist up to your mouth, speaking into it like you’re giving an interview. “Jungkook, how does it feel to be put on blast for your spicy endeavors right when you walk into the party?”
You hold your fist out to him, offering him the mic. “Spicy endeavors?” 
“Promiscuous has negative implications and we are sex-positive here.” 
“Wow, such forward-thinking media. I’ve never heard of that before.”
“You never will again, I’m afraid.”
Jungkook shakes his head and chuckles, gesturing to the drinks all over the counter. “You want a drink?” 
“I do.”
With a drink in hand, you both return to the party. There’s dancing going on in a corner of the living room, a card game going on in the dining room, and a smoke session going on around the couches. Jungkook sits on the arm of the couch next to Jimin and another girl you don’t know.
You freeze up a little, unsure where to sit. Jungkook doesn’t seem to notice, reaching a hand out as he joins the conversation around the coffee table. You hesitate for a second, a little caught off guard before placing your hand in his and letting him pull you against him, leaning onto his thigh with your hips pressed together. His arm loops around the back of your thighs, hand resting on the outside of your leg. Your hand drops on his shoulder as you lean into him. 
People you know stop and say hi, their eyes lingering for a long time on the way you and Jungkook lean into one another. You ignore them, content to let them wonder how it is a little producer from ILIA got her claws into Jungkook for the night. 
When a weed pen is passed to Jungkook, you watch with curiosity to see what he’ll do. He takes it but looks up at you, raising his brow in question and holding it out like he’s asking for permission. You’re surprised but you nod - you don’t control what he does.  It’s sweet. Surprising, but sweet.
Jungkook takes two short pulls, blowing the smoke in the opposite direction from you. The girl next to him whines, swatting at it and smacking his leg, giggling. You pay it no mind, unworried about the flirting. He’s not yours, and even if he was, it’s your waist he has pressed against him.
Jungkook holds the pen up to you and you make a face. “I don’t know whose mouth has been on that.”
He snorts. “Alright, Mozart. I have my own. Would you prefer that?”
“Yes, I would.” 
Rolling his eyes but smiling, he passes it over to someone else and stands, your hand falling from his shoulder. “Come on, brat. We’ll go to the balcony so we don’t have to share.”
“Thank you, that’s what I deserve.” 
He giggles. “You can’t even say that with a straight face.”
“Imagine if I meant it.”
Jungkook navigates the apartment easily. You follow him, not unaware of the gazes and whispers that pass. You lift your chin. Let them talk. The only opinions that matter to you are those of your bosses, Yoongi, Jimin, and occasionally your mother on a good day. 
Right now, nothing else matters. 
It’s cold outside. You shiver while Jungkook shuts the sliding glass door to the balcony just off the bedroom. Light floods in from the hallway into the room, casting a golden glow behind you. Jungkook leans on the railing, pulling a weed pen from his pocket and waving it in front of you like a prize. 
You snatch it from him, sticking your tongue out. Bringing it to your lips, you suck gently on the tip, filling your mouth with acrid smoke as you inhale. It burns a little, making your eyes water as you let the air and remaining smoke out before passing it back to Jungkook. He echos your movements. 
Leaning against the railing, you look out at the city. It is dazzling from this high up, a home made for a god to watch over their creation. Silence hangs between you, occasionally passing the pen back and forth. The wind feels good, though a little cold. And you appreciate how quiet it is, the sounds of the party muted through the windows. 
Down below, the street looks mostly empty. It’s so far down that you’re not really sure. Your high starts to hit, dulling the edges of everything and making you feel a little soft and floating. You grip the railing a little tighter, looking at Jungkook from the corner of your eye. 
Fuck if he isn’t beautiful. 
“What?” he asks, a smile in his voice as he side-eyes you. “You’ve got a look on your face.”
“Nothing.”
“Mm. Not nothing. What?”
“You’re not what I expected. It’s a really nice change of pace.”
“Ah,” he answers, ducking his head. You grin, realizing that he’s blushing and trying to hide it. You poke his arm, laughing as you prod at him. “Stop, you’re making me shy.”
“You? Shy?” 
“Oh yeah. I am a mess around people. I might seem good at it, but it takes champagne and sometimes a Xanax to get me to operate at a level that’s normal with everyone else.”
“And then do you stay up all night re-thinking every single interaction you had and punishing yourself like why the fuck did I say this very weird thing?”
“Yes!” he exclaims, frowning and tilting his head up toward the sky. “It is exhausting. Sometimes I’m so worried I’m going to embarrass myself that I skip an event altogether and take the fucking verbal beating from the company.” 
“Ugh, Mila would fit right in.”
“She’s kind of a snake, huh?”
You hum. “Jimin called her exactly that earlier tonight.” 
“My agent hates her. Says she’s a total control freak and vicious.” You snort. That is an understatement. “Makes her successful, though. She has some of the world's biggest names under her.” 
“Yeah, but I didn’t choose her. She was assigned to me. Honestly, I don’t think she thought I had any potential to bring her success and be a household name until I won that award for producing Hwasa’s song.” 
“It was a good song.”
You smile distantly, looking out at the hazy lights of the city. Everything feels a little slow and dreamy, your thoughts fluid. “I liked it. I want to do better - be better. A lot of it’s about connections though and I… am not great at that part.”
“I think you’re doing pretty okay.”
Jungkook shifts closer. He’s turned to you, so near that you’re almost touching. He looks down at you through long lashes, watching for your reaction. You look up at him, a little starry eyed and dizzy at his proximity. This close, you can see the freckle just under his mouth. You want to kiss him, but you hold back, feeling your insecurity worm its way in.
“Yeah?” you ask, a little breathy. “Are you saying there’s a connection here?”
“Uh-huh.” He tucks his bottom lip between his teeth. He reaches a hand forward and brushes the underside of your chin, tilting your face up toward him even more. “Come home with me.”
The breath leaves your lungs. You’re not surprised that he’s asked, and yet your body still reacts, adrenaline taking over. His gaze is hungry as he watches you, waiting for your response, finger still propped under your chin like he might kiss you.
“Take me on a date,” you assert. Perhaps it's the drinks and the weed that makes you so bold, but you want more than anyone else has had from him. You want to be different. “Dinner.”
He tries to fight a smile, tonguing the inside of his cheek. The action is wildly attractive for some reason, nearly making you waver and let him take you home now. “Do you like Italian?”
“Yes.”
“Good,” he says. “Tomorrow.”
“The day after. I’m busy tomorrow with work.”
He narrows his eyes. “Damn. Gonna make me wait in agony, huh?”
You grin. “I’m worth waiting for.”
“You very much are. Day after tomorrow at eight. Wear something nice.” 
“Fine. Wear those necklaces you wore for your Vogue shoot.”
He cocks his head to the side. “Oh?” Jungkook purrs. “You like the necklaces?”
“I like to imagine what they look like dangling above my face.”
He shakes his head. “You’re gonna be the fucking death of me.”
“Good. The day after tomorrow.” You take a step back, a wicked grin on your face. He drops his hand, staring you down. “Don’t be late.” 
-
Jungkook isn’t late and you wish that he was. Cursing over and over again, you pull the knee-high boot up your leg, thankful for the supple, flexible leather that fits your calf. You nearly fall over tugging on the next, finally getting your boots on and standing up straight in front of your mirror out of breath and flustered. 
The outfits had not gone according to plan. Something about going on a date with Jungkook has you feeling all out of sorts, going through enough outfits that your bed is now covered in them. You refused to tell Mila that you were going on the date, knowing that if she caught wind of it, she’d send paparazzi. As it is, Jungkook has assured you he’s gone through the hoops for a private dinner at an upscale Italian restaurant near the river. 
Turning in the mirror, you decide that the short, black dress over sheer black pantyhose paired with platform boots and a long, black peacoat will have to do. Grabbing your phone, you text Jungkook back quickly that you’re coming downstairs, apologizing for the delay.
Jungkook: Like you said, you’re worth waiting for. 
Me: Oh, I can take longer… 
Jungkook: Don’t make me come up there. 
Jungkook: Actually, on second thought, make me come up there.
As you pass your kitchen, you double back and run to the alcohol cabinet, pulling a bottle of tequila down quickly to shoot back a quick swig. It burns your throat, making you cough and squeeze your eyes shut as you hack for a moment, corking the bottle and gasping for air. 
At least it will take the edge off. 
Wiping the traces from your chin, you rush out of your apartment, letting the tequila burn its way through you to set the first layer of calm. In the elevator, you take in a slow, deep breath for five seconds. Exhale for five seconds. Inhale for five seconds.
The elevator dings, making you flinch. Clutching your purse to steady your trembling hands, you step out onto the ground floor of the parking garage where you find Jungkook parked illegally and leaning on the side of the vehicle. 
Slowing your steps, you appreciate the boy and then the car. Jungkook is dressed in black slacks with a belt at the waist and a black, tight-fitted turtleneck. The material of the shirt forms to his body, showing his defined arms and toned chest. 
Jungkook’s hair is slicked back, a single dangling earring on his left lobe paired with the rest of his signature hoops. You have no idea how a single piece of jewelry changes everything about his energy, but your heart rate skyrockets as you approach him, a little shy. 
He lets out a low, slow whistle. “Fuck. You are a knockout.” 
“You look pretty good yourself.”
“Nah, Mozart. You look…” He shakes his head and scratches the back of his neck, laughing a little. “You’re gonna fucking wreck me.”
A nervous laugh escapes you and you chew the inside of your cheek as you stop in front of him, hands crossed in front of you. He pushes off the car, which is a sleek Porsche, and sticks his hand out to you. Tentatively, you place your hand in his. 
Leaning forward, Jungkook places a kiss on your cheek. Your lashes flutter, skin warm. He pulls away with a small smile. “You look beautiful. I mean it.” 
“You’re making me nervous.”
“No kidding, I feel like my heart is about to come out of my chest.”
He’s going to be the death of you. It’s endearing, how honest he is, letting what he’s thinking pour out of his mouth. You’re unsure if it’s part of his game or if it’s genuine, and it puts you a little on edge, trying to guess what’s going through his mind. 
Lacing his fingers with yours, Jungkook escorts you around the car and opens the passenger. The interior of the car smells clean and is lined with white LED lights and red leather seats. You raise your brows as you slide inside, your coat protecting you from the cold leather. 
Jungkook closes your door and rounds the back, slipping into the driver’s side. He turns to you, tilting his head to the side. You fiddle with the buttons on your coat. “What?”
“Kiss me,” he says, sounding breathless. “Kiss me so we don’t have to be nervous anymore.”
“You just want me to kiss you.” 
Jungkook puts his elbow on the center console and leans forward. He looks down his nose at you, eyes focused on your mouth. You squeeze your thighs together, trying to fight a shiver of adrenaline threatening to take over. “So what?”
“Ask me nicely,” you murmur, leaning toward him. You look him in the eye, trying to still your hummingbird heart. This close, you see the flecks of gold in his irises, swirls of brown and caramel. They’re beautiful, framed by silky lashes. “I’ll take it into consideration.”
“Please kiss me.” 
“Hmm?”
“I am begging you to kiss me.”
“Almost…”
“I need you to kiss me.”
So you do. 
Jungkook’s mouth is soft. He laughs in surprise but leans into the kiss, slotting his mouth against yours firmly. It’s innocent and sweet, just a gentle brush of lips. You pull away, noses bumping against one another as he rests his forehead on yours. 
It’s quiet and cold in the interior of the car, only the sound of your shallow breathing and the hum of the engine audible. Something electric courses through your veins, ignited by the feeling of his mouth against yours and you immediately want more. You’ve never felt this sudden, carnal desire before. This need to fall into him. 
For a second, you fight it. Then, you give in. 
Leaning forward, you catch Jungkook’s lips in a real kiss. It’s slow at first. You catch him off guard but he’s quick to keep up, sucking your bottom lip into his mouth greedily. Dizziness makes your world spin. You press up against the center console, sliding your tongue gently against his. Jungkook reaches a hand up to your face, cradling you as he deepens the kiss. 
His mouth tastes like spearmint gum. Your skin is overheating, and you suddenly feel  stuffy and constricted in your jacket. Jungkook breaks the kiss, panting against your lips as he presses chaste kisses to the side of your mouth and lips. 
“Did you drink tequila?” he asks, voice husky. He starts kissing your jaw and your head lolls to the side, eyelids fluttering. “Tastes like it.”
“I was nervous,” you pant, almost moaning as his tongue flicks out to lick at your skin. “So I took a shot.”
“I make you that nervous?” His teeth pull at your earlobe. You sink further into the seat, starting to turn boneless. You feel like you’re melting at the joints, abruptly unable to string together a sentence under the attention of his greedy, warm mouth. “Cat got your tongue?”
“You’re supposed to take me to dinner.”
“Oh, I am. And then we'll order ice cream, and then we’re going home.” 
“Oh?” 
“My home. I have necklaces to show you.”
“Fuck.” 
Reluctantly, Jungkook pulls away. His lips are wet and a little dark from kissing you, his eyes wild. You watch him from where you’re sunken in the seat, a little wrecked from just kissing. You realize that Jungkook has the potential to ruin you. To crack you open and devour you.
And you let him. 
Reaching across the car, you cradle his face, thumb pulling at his bottom lip, damp with your lip gloss and spit. “Pretty,” you murmur. His tongue darts out, laving across your thumb. You grin. “Dangerous.” 
“Not with you.” 
“I’ve heard that before.”
“Well, I mean it.”
“We barely know each other.”
He shrugs. “I don’t care. I have a sense for these things.”
“Mmm.” You drop your hand from his face. “Dinner, then. And ice cream. And then home.” 
-
Jungkook’s first lie is that he’s not dangerous with you. He nearly kills you several times on the way to dinner, leaning over at almost every stoplight to bring your mouth to his again. His mouth is addictive, each kiss intense and intended to make you fall further and further into this waking dream you’re in. 
By the time the valet opens your door to a private entrance at the restaurant and helps you out, you think you might be entirely drunk on Jungkook’s kisses alone. He laces his fingers with yours, pulling you close as you walk up toward the back of the restaurant.
Inside is a dark hall, barely lit by fixtures in the ceiling casting gold light. It takes a moment for your eyes to adjust as Jungkook gives the host his name. To your right is a curtain with the soft hush of diners and piano music. To your left is another curtain with no sound coming through. 
“Thank you for choosing us, Mr. Jeon. Right this way.”
The host bows his head slightly, guiding you to the left curtain. He pulls it open and gestures for you to enter. You step through after Jungkook, raising your brows when you realize it’s a private dining room. It looks reserved for events and parties perhaps, but the room is furnished with a single table and rich, mahogany chairs. 
Velvet drapery covers the walls and a large, crystal chandelier hangs over the table. The heels of your boots click on the hardwood floors as Jungkook leads you to your seat, letting go of your hand to pull out the chair. You flash him a smile, sitting as he helps you scoot in. 
He sits across from you, adjusting his shirt sleeves. Your eyes momentarily get sidetracked when you realize he has on the layered necklaces you ask for, and you grin before averting your attention to the host who instructs that the chef and the sommelier will be with you momentarily to talk about your dining options for the evening.
When he leaves, it’s just you and Jungkook with the soft sound of piano trailing from somewhere distant. You level your gaze on him, watching him watch you. The setting feels intimate, leaving you a little overwhelmed but in a good way. You’ve gone on dates, but not like this. 
“What?” he questions gently. “You have a look on your face.”
“I’m just impressed, is all.”
“It only gets better from here. I have so many ideas for dates.” 
“Oh? Plural?”
“Mhmm.” He leans back in his seat, tonguing his cheek. “If all goes well, anyway.” 
“So far so good.” 
The sommelier and the chef arrive together, hands tucked behind their backs. It’s hard to pay them much mind. Jungkook is distracting, even as he gives them his full attention, nodding along and answering their questions. He looks to you for input, but you feel a little useless, barely listening to what they’re saying. 
“Trust me enough to order?” he asks, leaning over the table conspiratorially. 
“Well, you’re with me, so you must have good taste. I trust you.” 
His foot nudges your ankle under the table playfully. He orders a round of appetizers and wine. When the sommelier asks you to sample it, you follow Jungkook's lead, inhaling the dark red lightly. It smells strongly of cherries and something sweet, making your mouth water. The taste is lush and wonderful, pleasing to the palate. 
The sommelier bows and leaves the two of you alone, vanishing behind the curtain. Jungkook lifts his wine glass to you, smiling. “Here’s to our first date and many more.” 
“Cheers.” 
After a sip, you set your glass down and look at Jungkook from across the table. “Was it absolutely painful, waiting for today?”
“I hardly survived, to be honest. All day yesterday I lay in bed dreaming of today.”
“Hmm. Is that all you dream about?”
His gaze darkens. “Careful, Mozart. I dream very vividly.”
Jungkook does impress you. With his knowledge about a wide variety of topics, with the charming expressions he uses as he speaks, with… him overall. He’s multifaceted in a way you rarely get to see with others, and you feel giddy as you listen to him.
Though you have a similar experience getting into music, it’s nice to hear Jungkook’s story. You keep it light, avoiding the darker parts of going through trainee programs and how competitive and hard it was to be a kid, growing up while working. 
He asks you about music. Not just the music you work on, but the music you grew up listening to, your favorite genres, and the technical aspects of making music. Jungkook is intelligent and familiar with the mechanics of making records. He asks questions and nods along, interested and curious in learning. 
You can’t remember the last time you had a conversation go this well, even outside of dates. When you urged Jungkook to take you on a date, you weren’t sure you’d end up liking him. Now though, as he lets you take the last stuffed mushroom because you can have whatever you want, you realize that you like him. 
It is such a dangerous game to play, especially with the rumors you hear about him. 
Instead of thinking about it, you enjoy dinner. You both finish the bottle of wine and he orders another. You’re feeling loose and warm, laughing more often and giving him lazy smiles. Even without the wine, you want to drag him to the bathroom and get on your knees. Now with a few glasses in, you’re thinking about it more and more. 
Dinner sobers you up a little, but it doesn’t remove the heat between your legs and the growing desire to kiss him again. You think about the way his mouth moved against yours, tongue gentle and talented. Your mind wanders into places less innocent, especially after dinner comes to an end and ice cream is brought out, as promised.
Jungkook carves the spoon through the dessert, leaning forward with it held out. You smirk, leaning to meet him halfway to let him slide the ice cream into your mouth. Cold vanilla melts on your tongue. It’s good and creamy, but you hardly pay attention to the taste, eyes fastened to Jungkook’s. 
“Good?” His voice is deep, soft. “I want to taste.”
You pick up your spoon, picking up a small scoop. You hold it out to him and he repeats your motion, bending to meet you. His eyes don’t leave yours as he eats it, tongue running over the bottom of his lip after to catch any extra. 
“Fuck.”
“Yeah,” he agrees, getting up abruptly. He holds his hand out to you and you place yours in his. He hoists you up and surprises you by pulling you into his chest. “We’re going.” 
You lean up on your toes, stealing his lips with yours. They taste like the wine you’ve been drinking. Your mouth tingles as you kiss him and your thoughts are cottony and slow, only focused on the way he hums, leaning forward to swipe his tongue eagerly into your mouth.
The kiss turns a little messy. You’re woozy, letting him bend you backward as he steals the breath from your lungs. Jungkook is intoxicating, your hand dropping his to wrap around his neck. You thread your fingers through the waves at the nape of his neck. They’re silky soft, sliding between your fingers. You tug a little, pulling a groan low in his throat.
“Careful or I will fuck you here,” he pants, spit-slicked mouth moving against yours. You run your tongue along his bottom lip, tasting more wine. “Devil.” 
“What’s stopping you?” 
Jungkook pulls away from you, holding you at arm's length. You stare up at him, eyes heavy. You feel arousal pool in your stomach with the way he looks at you, his mouth wine-stained. 
“That’s how you want it?” His tone is threatening. Laced with something carnal. Your stomach flutters as you nod. You’re not thinking about anything but him, not worried about anything. “Fuck.”
Without hesitation, he grabs you by the hand and pulls you across the floor. You follow him eagerly, heart hammering as Jungkook all but kicks the private bathroom door open. He yanks you inside and spins you, pushing you toward an elegant sink.
The bathroom is dark. The walls are painted black and the gold-fixtured lighting is dim. It would be romantic if Jungkook wasn’t flicking the lock behind him and advancing on you. Just as he reaches for you, you surprise him, dropping to your knees and looking up through your lashes. 
He raises his brows, looking down at you, heat behind his eyes. You lift your hand to the zipper of his pants, slowly pulling it down, pausing for permission.
“Go ahead, baby,” he murmurs, nodding. “Take what you want.”
Licking your lips, you do exactly that. Your fingers are nimble as you undo the button at the top of his pants. You pull them down a little, just enough to get them out of your way. You eye the hardening outline of his cock against his briefs, breath catching. 
You look up at him. “You have a huge cock, don’t you?”
He sticks out his tongue between his teeth. “Why don’t you find out, hmm?”
Leaning high up on your knees, you lick the outline of his cock, watching as he shivers. You run your tongue to the tip of his cock, stopping to mouth at it. He curses, hips twitching as you soak the fabric with your mouth, placing your hands on his thighs.
Muscles twitch under your palms. You dig your nails in and scratch upward, the fabric hissing underneath your fingers. Reaching the waistband of his briefs, you pull down agonizingly slow. Jungkook’s fingers twitch at his sides, but he lets you do what you want, breathing heavily through parted lips. 
Jungkook’s cock springs out. You feel your mouth water at his thick length, already hard from the barest stimulation. Pearly beads of precum decorate the dark tip. You hum, contented as you stick your tongue out and give a quick kitten lick to the base of his shaft. 
He hisses, hips twitching forward. Teasing him, you trace your tongue along a vein on the underside of his cock until you reach the tip, circling the swollen head with your tongue generously. Jungkook closes his eyes, his head falling backward.
You grip him firmly, gathering saliva in your mouth before spitting on his cock. He moans out loud and you grin, pumping him slowly while ducking under your hand to lave your tongue across his balls. He curses and a hand shoots to your head, not pushing you, but fingers pressed tight against your skull.
“Fuck, you like being a little slut?” he growls. 
“Mhmm,” you answer back, pulling his cockhead into your mouth. His salty precum melts on your tongue. 
Jungkook fills your mouth. You feel the stretch on the sides of your lips as you take him in properly. You let spit pool on your tongue as you slide down his cock, slurping gently as you do. It’s messy and wet and a little clumsy, the wine making you uncoordinated. 
It doesn’t matter. His fingers press into your hair as you set a rhythm, bobbing your head and sucking gently while your hand pumps what you can’t fit in your mouth. Jungkook pants above you, his soft moans echoing off the tile. 
The sounds he makes spur you further. Drool runs down your chin as he succumbs. You watch him through misty eyes, the crown of his cock kissing the back of your throat as you try to take him further than you can manage. You feel your throat constrict, coughing a bit as you pull off of him, twisting your wrist as you work him and gasp for air.
Spit and precum connect your lips to his cock in a thick string. It breaks when you cough, eyes stinging. 
“Yeah?” he asks, gritting his teeth. “Like choking on that fucking cock?”
You run the flat of your tongue over his frenulum, making him wine. “Like hearing you moan,” you admit. The slick sound of your hand stroking him makes you squeeze your legs together. “It makes me so fucking wet.” 
“Show me.”
Jungkook’s hands go to yours. He pulls you up by the wrists. Your knees feel wobbly but he holds you steady, pressing you against the counter. He steals a searing kiss from you that is more tongue than lips, hands skimming up your arms and down your sides until he’s at the hem of your dress where he pauses. 
“This okay?” Your eyelids flutter open. His nose is pressed against yours, eyes steady. “We can stop whenever or if you’re too drunk.”
“I’m not.” It’s true, you’re a little drunk off the wine, but your head is clear. You know exactly what you want and your thoughts are concise. There are no hesitations and you don’t care that you’re in a bathroom, face wet with mixed fluids. “Want it.”
“Mmm.” 
Jungkook slips a hand under your dress, fingers brushing over your soft thighs. It feels good, his dragging touch enticing. Your head tilts back, allowing him to press hot, wet kisses on your throat. His fingers pick at the garter belt secured to your pantyhose, making him groan.
“I wanna see these later.”
“You will.”
He licks your neck. “Good.”
You close your eyes, enjoying the feeling of his mouth sucking gently at your throat while his hand slides to your underwear. He presses the pads of his fingers over the silk, just enough to make your thighs close around his hand, gasping. 
“You are wet.” There’s a smile in his voice. He moves his fingers in a gentle circle, applying pressure to the damp spot on your underwear. “Sucking me off did that?” 
“And the ice cream.”
“Oh? Watching me eat ice cream, huh?”
“Sorry about it.”
“Don’t be.” He hooks a finger and pulls your panties to the side, touching your sticky folds properly. A moan slips out of your mouth. You can feel your heart slamming in your chest so hard you think you might have a cardiac episode. “You can watch me eat your pussy later.” 
Between the implication that there is a later and thereby more after this, and the way Jungkook’s fingers slip up and down your heat, you’re a goner. It feels so good, some of the pressure between your legs relieved as he teases your clit.
Spreading your legs wider, you lean hard into the bathroom counter. It hurts where it presses against your spine but you ignore it, content to let him push you until your head hits the mirror. 
Jungkook’s fingers tease your hole, leaving your cunt clenching. You whine, bringing your hands to his face to pull him off your neck and to your mouth, biting his lip playfully. 
“Fuck me,” you ask between kisses, mouths smacking loudly. “Wanna feel you stretch me out.”
“Can’t even wait until we’re home?”
“You can fuck me there too.”
He laughs darkly. “Demon.”
Jungkook removes his hand from between your legs and bends at the knee, grabbing you behind the thighs. You jump lightly and he lifts you, putting you on the counter. Your dress hikes up, baring your glistening cunt to him, underwear still pulled to the side. 
Balmy air kisses your skin. It’s hot in the bathroom as he cages you in, tattooed hand pumping his cock. You’re bent out of shape, spreading your legs and feeling the strain of the straps on your garner belt as you stretch them. 
Reaching between your legs, you pull your underwear farther to the side, ensuring they won’t be in the way. He shakes his head, eying your heat hungrily as he runs the tip of his dick up and down your messy folds. It feels good but it’s not enough, making you squirm and whine audibly. 
He tuts at you, sliding his hand up to press the head of his cock into your dripping hole. Your eyes roll back, feeling the pressure of him splitting you open as he sinks in. The stretch of him aches in pleasure-pain, your pussy opening up for every inch that he feeds you.
“Shit you’re tight,” he gasps, falling forward to rest his head on your shoulder. His back muscles strain against his shirt as he pushes in the rest of the way, bottoming out until you’re stuffed full, walls fluttering around him. “God, I could come just like this.”
“Pussy whipped?” 
“Fuck, I’m gonna be.”
One of your hands goes around his neck, nails pressing into his skin. He sucks in air sharply. Your other hand drifts to his ass, grabbing him and squeezing. “Please make me come. I need it.” 
Instead of answering verbally, he starts to fuck into you. It’s not a slow build or something passionate. It’s needy and heady and desperate. He sets a brutal pace and you can’t help but let out a loud moan, the shape of his name escaping you.
The feeling is addicting. You cling to him, jostling against the sink as he fucks you. The wet sound of your cunt around him is loud and lewd, backtracked by your breathy moans getting louder and higher-pitched. You feel yourself shaking, fingers digging into him as he grabs your hips, holding you down to the counter.
Jungkook’s breath fans your neck, his face buried there. He curses, occasionally biting your tender skin, making you squeal. You can feel the ghost of a smile against you, his tongue soothing your stinging flesh. 
Grabbing one of your thighs, he hikes your leg higher. You slide into the sink, nearly bent in half as he changes the angle. He hits your spot on the upstroke, almost sending you into an orgasm immediately. The tension in your stomach is so tight you think you’re going to unravel. 
Instead, it climbs higher and higher. You can barely breathe as he straightens to fuck you even harder. The faucet digs into your back. You don’t care, grabbing the counter as you cling to it for life, babbling. Nothing that comes out of your mouth makes any sense and just when you think you can’t take it anymore, you come. Hard. 
Everything in your body locks up. You spasm around him, squeezing his cock for everything it's worth. Your orgasm is swift and powerful, taking the breath from you for a long moment before you finally manage to gasp for air, sagging against the sink. 
With a few messy pumps, Jungkook comes with a loud curse, head tossed back, hips slamming yours. You can feel your release between the two of you, sticky and running down your thighs. His thrusts slow until he’s left softening inside of you.
Come leaks when he slowly pulls out. The drip is obscene but you’re too fucked out to care, looking up at him in a daze. It smells like sex in the bathroom and a light layer of sweat covers your skin. 
Carefully, Jungkook tucks himself back in his pants before ripping paper towels out of the dispenser to gently wipe at your thighs. You laugh and let him take care of you, grateful that he does. He swipes one greedy finger up your pussy and pops it into his mouth, making your jaw drop.
“Fuck, I can’t wait to eat you out later.”
You chew your lip as he finishes wiping the mess from your lower half. “So there is a later, still?”
He looks dubious. “I told you that you were coming home with me.”
“I know I just thought maybe…”
“That I was gonna fuck you in a bathroom and that would be what I wanted?” You nod. “I told you, I want more dates. Something about you, Mozart. Also, you letting me fold you in half in a bathroom makes me want to drop down on one knee.”
It pleases you to hear that more than you care to admit. 
With Jungkook’s help, you ease off the counter. At a glance in the mirror, you burst into hysterical laughter. Your mascara is smudged, your mouth is wet, and you look wrecked. He laughs too, caging you in and reaching around you to turn on the faucet, running the tips of his fingers underneath and bringing them up to gently wipe under your eyes.
You smile at him as he attempts to make the running makeup less noticeable. When he finishes, he turns off the faucet but remains pressed to your back, arms looped casually around you. He has a small smile, staring at you in the mirror.
“What?” you ask, laughing.
“This is going to sound stupid,” he prefaces. “But I just feel something here. I don’t know how to explain it.”
“Post-nut clarity?”
He presses his pelvis into you. “No. It’s just like this really silly… I don’t know. Crush. But it just feels right.”
Surprisingly, you understand what he means. This spark you feel with him is new to you. There’s never been anyone else you feel so natural with, so immediately attracted to. Certainly not enough to throw inhibition to the wind and suck them off in a bathroom. 
Something about Jungkook lights you up, a candle catching fire and burning through the wick hot and fast. People might call it reckless and immature, but you don’t know how else to explain this innate desire to jump in head-first with him. 
“I feel it too.” 
He kisses the back of your head. “Come on. I’m not done with you yet.” 
-
You feel lost in the lights on the way home. Jungkook’s hand settles on your thigh, thumb brushing back and forth. He’s a little subdued, focusing on the road. You don’t distract him, content to adjust the air conditioning so that it cools you off, your skin on fire from the wine and Jungkook. 
The night certainly went in a direction you weren’t planning, but you don’t mind. Jungkook excites you. Perhaps it is a little rash and naive, but you don’t care, enamored by the layers of him. You want to peel back more, to dig to the core until he’s yours. 
Whatever the madness is, it appears to be equal. When Jungkook pulls into the luxury apartment building known for high-profile celebrities and government officials, he’s on you again, pulling you across the car to meld your mouths together. 
Dull pain blooms in your mouth, lips bruised from kissing him. You don’t care, eager to slot your tongue against his, brushing against the wet-rough feel of it. 
“Come on,” he whispers, tugging your bottom lip with his teeth. “Let’s go upstairs.”
It should not surprise you when Jungkook swipes a key fob and selects the penthouse apartment, but it does. It shocks you even more when the elevator opens into a four-level home. Your mouth drops open a little as you enter, Jungkook’s fingers laced with yours. 
Floor-to-ceiling windows stretch the entire four-story home. From where you stand in the entryway, you can see multiple open-concept rooms, each ornately decorated with a modern style and neutral tones. Nothing about what you can see screams Jungkook, suggesting that his label has put him here - has the money to put him here.
The thought itself is staggering, momentarily reminding you who you just let fuck you senseless in the bathroom at an upscale restaurant. Letting Jungkook’s hand go, you wander into the main room of the apartment, stepping down into the sunken living room with large, curved couches surrounding a coffee table.
Above you, a massive glass artwork of floating lights hovers. They’re turned off, but it looks like a sculpture project most likely commissioned by a wildly expensive artist. Jungkook joins you in front of the towering windows overlooking a wide terrace. The sheer curtains do nothing to hide the twinkling lights of the city. 
It gives the illusion that you’re among the stars. Jungkook leans over and presses a button on the remote. The curtains quietly begin to roll open, revealing the view in full. It is breathtaking, much more magnificent than the view from Hoseok’s apartment. 
“They really pulled out all the stops for you,” you murmur, turning to look at him. He toes the carpet, twisting his mouth as he blushes. “This is insane.”
“It’s too much.”
“A little bit. But it’s cool.”
He smiles and reaches a hand out. “Let me show you the rest tomorrow after breakfast.”
You take his hand and let him pull you along toward the winding staircase. “I want waffles.” 
“And in the morning, I’m making waffles!”
You both dissolve into laughter at the Shrek reference. Jungkook pulls you up the steps until you’re on the top floor, which is made up of a spacious bedroom with windows that overlook the city, an ornate bathroom you can only see the door to, what you assume is a walk-in closet, and an additional terrace with an infinity pool, firepit area, and bar. 
The bedroom is more of Jungkook’s style. It’s not nearly as pristine, the sheets and blankets rumpled, all dark grey tones. There are shoes by the closet door and a shelf in the far corner with action figures and collectibles that you don’t recognize. 
In the middle of the room stretches an impossibly large bed with modern sconces on either side. Medication, a glass of water, and a watch are on the nightstand next to the bed. And no signs of other suitors, you notice, but you push the thought out of your mind as Jungkook pulls you backward toward his bed, smiling.
This time you’re slower. He sits on the bed, pulling you by the waist to straddle him. Your knees sink feather-soft into the mattress on either side of him, settling yourself on his thighs as you draw him in for a kiss. You hold him gently by the jaw, fingers spread and pressing warm into his skin. 
Jungkook’s hands skate around your hips to your ass, squeezing gently as your tongues dance together. Your buzz from the wine is gone now, replaced with desire burning through you, hot as a torch. It doesn’t feel needy and crazed now, but a little softer. More intimate. 
Carefully, Jungkook leans backward, taking you with him. You squeal into his mouth as you land on top of him, arms giving out. You crash into his chest, though not too hard. 
“Sorry,” he mumbles. He places his hands on your waist and precariously rolls over, managing not to knock heads and limbs as he places you under him. His knee slots between your legs, hands leaving your waist to bracket your head. “God damn, you are beautiful.”
It’s strange. You feel beautiful - or at least, you feel desired under him. Perhaps it is not the same thing, but the way Jungkook looks at you with swollen lips and starry eyes, you feel powerful. Godly, even. 
He dips back down, pressing a kiss to your mouth and one to your jaw. He leaves a wake of heat, stealing your breath away. Leaning back, you give him access to map the tender flesh of your throat and collarbones, threading your fingers through his hair. 
Eyes closed, you let the world spin. His mouth is the finest delicacy, pressing kisses that are butterfly-soft all over your heated skin as he pulls the straps of your dress. You help him by slipping your arms out. He gathers the fabric and pulls down, sitting up as he does so.
Silk rolls against your skin. It’s cool in his bedroom, making you shiver as he reveals your lacy bra and matching garter. He tosses the dress, sitting high up on his knees as you lay splayed out for him. 
“You know,” he ventures. “Normally I don’t like lingerie.” His fingers trace the swells of your breasts. Your chest rises and falls rapidly, goosebumps breaking out on your skin from the tantalizing touch. “But I could get used to it on you.”
“I only wear it on special occasions.” 
Jungkook lowers himself, planting a wet kiss on the top of your right breast. “What’s the occasion?” 
“I needed something to hold up my pantyhose.”
His laugh cools the fresh trail of spit he leaves on your skin, earning a violent shiver from you. He notices, eyes flicking up to look at you. They’re endless pools of dark, watching your every move as he slow-drags a finger up your stomach to the top of your bra. He hooks his finger over the top of the cup and pulls gently, the fabric scraping your over-sensitive nipple. 
Everything he does feels overwhelmingly erotic. You watch, hypnotized and out of breath as he sticks out his tongue, circling your nipple lazily but not giving it attention directly. You let out a wavering moan, voice gone. 
Oh so slowly, Jungkook flicks his tongue over the hardened peak of your nipple. You bow up into him, wanting more. He tsks at you and you go flat on the bed, fisting the sheets tightly to ground yourself as he grins, delighted. 
“You listen well, huh?” You nod, head heavy. You can’t think of any words, thoughts bleeding together like liquid spilled across a watercolor canvas. “Is that how you like it? Being told what to do like a good girl?”
“Yes.” You suck in a sharp breath as Jungkook scrapes his teeth generously over your nipple. 
“You weren’t a very good girl when you got on your knees and swallowed my cock whole in the bathroom.” He flicks his tongue back and forth, sending your eyes to the back of your head as you squirm underneath him. “You were quite the dirty girl, huh?”
“Both.”
Instead of answering you, Jungkook envelops your bud fully, sucking gently. Pleasure rolls through you, your pussy beginning to slow ache with arousal. Your head falls to the side, and you’re only able to pant and dig your nails into his sides where you grab him, either to hold him to you or push him away; you’re not sure.
Jungkook’s mouth is wicked, lavishing your tits. He sucks greedily, noisy as he slides his tongue from one breast to the other. When you look at him, you see sin. Your chest shines in the glowing light of the city with the evidence of his oral fixation, turning you on even more. 
Your underwear sticks to you uncomfortably and your toes curl. It feels so good but you need so much more, dripping in a way that is maddening as he starts to trail his mouth downward. He is so so slow, tasting your skin, hands skimming your sides, scraping blunt nails across your sensitive flesh. 
He’s hardly done anything and yet you’re shaking underneath him, more sensitive and turned on than you’ve ever been. You cannot recall ever being this close to falling apart from just having someone touch you and play with your tits.
But it’s the way Jungkook looks at you. The movements of his hands on your skin. The way every single brush of his tongue and every drag of his teeth scraping over you seems perfectly timed. Attuned. 
It feels like Jungkook already knows every part of your body, and something about that both terrifies and excites you, kicking your adrenaline into high gear, heart rattling, pulse beating in your neck. 
With hooded eyes, you watch Jungkook unclasp the garter belt. He is gentle and methodical, pulling every layer of clothing off with a touch so reverent that it can only be holy. He is solely focused on his task, tasting your skin when his mouth draws near enough to feel you. 
When he has you naked and shaking, he sinks to the floor in front of the bed, hands pressing your thighs open. You feel how much of a mess you are, slick and cold as the air hits you. You whimper, pussy aching to the point of madness. 
Jungkook chuckles. “Yeah? Does it ache, baby?”
“Uh-huh.”
He blows cool air right onto your pussy. The sensation is a pleasure-sting, making you twist in his hands, trying to angle away from him to escape the cold. He laughs again, pinning your hips firmly to the bed while he presses hot-mouthed kisses to your inner thighs. 
“Eyes on me,” he murmurs into your skin. “I told you that you were going to watch me eat this pussy.” 
With effort, you lean up on your elbows, watching with your mouth parted as Jungkook tilts forward agonizingly slow to run the flat of his tongue up your cunt. Your fingers squeeze the sheets, thighs flexing under his firm hands. It feels so good but it looks even better. 
He smirks, dipping down again to slow-lick you from top to bottom. You’re hypnotized, feeling your stomach lurch violently at how good it feels and how good he looks sliding his tongue through your wetness. 
“Taste just as sweet as that ice cream,” he murmurs, sliding his hands closer to the apex of your thighs to hold you open. He catches your clit with his lips, sucking softly. Your head falls back as sparks explode under your skin. “Mmm. Like this so much better though.” 
“Feels so good,” you rasp, lifting your head to fixate your eyes on him again. “Fuck, Jungkook.” 
His tongue dips into your hole, tasting you further, drinking you in. “How do you like it?” he asks, tongue slowly zigzagging upward to circle your bundle of nerves. You’re trembling under him, fingers going numb with how tight you hold the sheets. “Slow? Fast? Messy?”
“Messy.”
He hums and brings his entire mouth to you, sucking greedily, tongue laving back and forth. You fall backward, unable to support yourself as he complies with your request. You bring a hand up to cover your face, trying to catch your breath. 
“Shit,” you gasp. 
Jungkook presses his face into your cunt, licking and slurping at you. The sounds are pornographic and you don’t care, your other hand going down between your legs to card through his hair, pulling gently. He grunts in appreciation, fucking his tongue into you, wiggling expertly. 
You feel thoroughly fucked. Your limbs are heavy, the world spinning as he devours you. He lets your hips cant against his face, encouraging you with soft little hums, mouth smacking against you. 
“This fucking pussy,” Jungkook swears, sucking harshly at your folds. “Fuck.”
“Wanna taste,” you beg, thoughts sticky. “Lemme.”
“Fuck.”
Jungkook’s tongue slides through your folds before he stands up, leaning over you. You turn to look at him - his eyes are blown, the bottom half of his face shining with your juice. You whine and open your mouth, sticking your tongue out eagerly. He follows your lead, grabbing your jaw and squeezing as he gathers your slick and his spit in his mouth before letting it drip into yours. 
You can barely taste yourself but you fold your tongue in anyway, closing your mouth to swallow. He seems dazed, pupils dilated and wild as he crashes his mouth to yours. Your teeth click together and you lick into his mouth, tasting yourself properly for a moment before he breaks away and drops back down, attaching his mouth to your pussy.
This time, Jungkook is vicious. He pulls you to the edge of insanity, your thighs closed around his head, his grip on your legs iron. He whips his head back and forth, tongue pressed hot and heavy against you. You climb climb climb climb -
You break. 
Everything in you seizes. You writhe in his hands, coming hard against his mouth. He doesn’t stop, mouthing you through your orgasm until you’re screaming and pushing at his forehead, the stimulation morphing from white-hot bliss to pleasure-laced pain. 
Jungkook lets you push him away only for him to climb up your body, ripping his shirt up as he goes. Your arms feel heavy and sluggish as you pull at his belt. Your fingers fumble, unable to work the button and the zipper, making him laugh.
“I got it,” he whispers, leaning forward to steal a brazen kiss. “You good?”
You nod, unable to form words. You are good, but you’re still dizzy from the orgasm. 
Still, seeing him strip off his shirt has you ready to go again. You lean forward, hand running up the flexing planes of his abs as he shuffles out of his pants. His body is beautiful - cut lines meeting soft skin, whorls of ink staining his arm and chest. His thighs are powerful, flexing as he kicks off his briefs, freeing his hard, heavy cock. 
You reach for him, grasping him in your hand and guiding him toward your messy heat. Jungkook groans as you run his swollen head up and down your folds, making his cock shine with your arousal. 
“Just like that,” he rasps, nodding his head. “Make it nice and fucking wet.”
After a few shallow thrusts, you take the tip and press down into your entrance. You feel a slight ache as he stretches you open despite having fucked you less than an hour ago. You pant through it, watching between your legs as he presses in until his hips are flush with yours. 
It is a tight fit. Full. But so, so good. Jungkook leans forward, placing his hands on either side of his head. You look up to see his necklaces dangling in your face, making you grin. You tug on them, bringing his mouth down to yours for a slow, gentle kiss. 
When he pulls away, he smiles. “Wore them just for you.” 
“Mmm good. Fuck me, please. Feels so full.” 
Jungkook’s left hand goes down, hiking your leg up around his waist. This time is different. He sets the pace slow, pulling all the way out and then gliding back in. You’re drenched enough to make the slide easy, your walls stretching around him the more he fucks you, setting a steady rhythm. 
Pleasure spreads from your cunt outward, unfurling like a blossom. The gentle drag of his cock is mind-numbing, your hands sliding up your stomach to cup your chest, squeezing your tits. He groans in appreciation, picking up his pace a little, the wet slap of skin against skin backtracked by your loud, heavy breathing. 
Sheets cling to your damp skin. You feel your chest heaving, Jungkook’s skin sliding against yours as he pulls you closer. You raise your hips, rolling into him, meeting his thrusts. Your hands slip on his arms, trying to find purchase on anything to ground you. 
“Fuck,” he gasps, trying to catch his breath. 
He pulls away and grabs both of your legs, making you slip. He’s careful not to pull out, pressing your legs together and hooking them side-by-side over his right shoulder, leaning in. The strain on your thighs feels good and the angle hits deep. 
You bring a hand to your mouth, biting into your knuckle. The pain is like a relief, an outlet to channel the pent-up orgasm building like an indestructible storm inside of you. 
Soft, deep moans drip from Jungkook’s mouth. Your feet flex, your body curling as the pleasure spreads. It’s like you can't sit still, every part of you exposed and raw, sparking with electricity as he drives his hips forward relentlessly. 
Your sweaty calf slips off of his shoulder. He slows and taps you on the leg. “Wanna ride me, baby?”
“Yeah. Wanna sit on it.”
“Good girl.”
You preen under the praise. He pulls out, leaving a wet trail of fluid as he does. You’re both a little fuck-drunk and uncoordinated, switching places as he tosses himself on his back, reaching up to grab pillows and stuff them under his shoulders and head.
Facing the windows, you throw a leg over his hips, surprising him by turning your back to him. He growls and slaps a hand on your ass, the sound loud in the room. You moan, spurred by the sting as you shift down to his hips. 
Grabbing his wet cock, you hover over the tip, carefully sinking down his shaft. This angle makes him so much deeper - you swear you feel him in your stomach. Speared to capacity, you take a moment to breathe, overwhelmed and overheated. Jungkook doesn’t mind, content to knead your ass and hips, fingers pressing into muscle and relieving tension. 
“That feels so nice,” you sigh, head rolling to the side. You close your eyes, pussy twitching and stuff full. 
“Yeah? I’ll give you a massage this week.”
“You’re promising me so many things.”
“Have to keep you on the hook.”
“And on your cock?”
He squeezes the globes of your ass. “Definitely on my cock. Feel so good wrapped around me.” 
Leaning forward, you put your hands on his shins, using him as leverage to slowly lift yourself. The drag feels delicious, and when you drop back down, it feels like the air is punched from your lungs. You fuck yourself on him at your own pace, listening to the sound of him falling apart, occasionally his hands cracking your cheeks. 
Biting your lip, you drive yourself to the edge of madness, shaking as your head falls forward between your arms, his name dropping from your mouth. Jungkook slides his hands under you, adding his assistance as he lifts you up and down his cock, helping you bounce. It’s wet and nasty and you don’t care, enjoying every second of it.
“Can I play with this pretty little asshole?” he asks, voice rough. 
“Uh-huh.”
Wet fingers slide between your cheeks. Jungkook presses a finger to your tight rim, not enough to breach but just enough to give mind-melting stimulation. You grind yourself in his lap, focusing on the way it feels every time you roll your hips. Jungkook’s finger circles your asshole in time, making you nearly sob as you work yourself to an orgasm, so fucking close to coming for the third time that night. 
He encourages you softly, come on, baby, and yeah just like that, get yourself off dripping from his lips. It’s like honey to your ears, sweet and syrupy. You work him faster, fingers going tight in the sheets as you hit your stride, arching up toward another release. 
It builds and builds until you’re right on the edge, so so so close that you’re nearly screaming, eyes squeezed shut, breath held, legs shaking. 
You fall over the edge, barely able to keep your rhythm. You feel your pussy flood around him. You’re gulping down air, hips still moving, broken cries interrupted by mindless babble. 
When you start to slow, Jungkook sits up. He nearly knocks you over but he catches you, carefully laying you flat on your stomach. You go boneless, barely there, and floating. Your last orgasm makes everything watery and opaque, Jungkook’s voice is like syrup when he speaks.
“You okay?” You nod vigorously, sticking your ass up a little bit. You’re a little bit useless, but you want him to come, want him to use you. He notices, laughing as he spreads your legs a little, mess running down your folds. “Such a good girl for me, giving me this swollen cunt to use. Fuck, you’re perfect.” 
Tired and spent, you roll your head to the side, closing your eyes, just content to breathe as Jungkook starts to fuck you with abandon. It still feels good, making you tremble underneath him, bordering overstimulation. You toe that line of electricity, fingers twisted in the blanket, breath hissing. 
Jungkook chases his orgasm, bending down to press a hot kiss onto your shoulder as he comes, tongue licking over the sweat and salt of your skin. 
Time moves differently then - at least it feels like it. You don’t know how much passes between Jungkook’s orgasm and him pulling out, or him finally getting up and waking you up. You’re dizzy when you look at him, head cottony and full of almost-sleep. 
Wordlessly, he takes you to the bathroom. You don’t have the mind to look at your surroundings or pay attention to what anything looks like, content to let him pull you into the shower and turn on the hot water. You’re barely there, lost between exhaustion and a post-bliss aura that makes you soft. 
When Jungkook kisses you in the shower, it’s not with the intent to start something else, but it does wake you up. You become a little more lucid, kissing him sweetly, innocent. Afterward, Jungkook wraps you in a fluffy towel and guides you through his bedroom to another room in the house, too tired to change his sheets.
You crash down in the bed together, heavy-limbed and sated. Jungkook pulls you close, already half asleep, eyes shut and mouth parted. You curl into him, realizing you fit perfectly into the curve of his body. Like you were made for him. 
Quickly you fall asleep, your last thought being that perhaps Jungkook is made for you.
-
Morning comes with a brush of a gentle mouth against your shoulder. You hum, turning your head toward the source of the touch. Jungkook’s lips press against yours, morning-slow, tired-soft. You’re sore everywhere - most notably between your legs - but you let him drag you into a lazy makeout session.
Neither of you are really awake. The sun has not come up yet, the world awash in dark grey. Warm blankets wrap around you, heat trapping between your body. Jungkook’s hand slides down your waist and dips between your legs. You part them, sighing as he swipes his fingers through you and groans when they come away wet.
No words are spoken. Only butterfly-soft breaths and gentle gasps of air as he sinks two fingers into your heat from behind. You open yourself up to him, falling into the feel-good stimulation of his touch as it brushes your G-spot.
It doesn’t matter that you’re tired and sore. You want more of Jungkook - cannot get enough of him. Already you’re thinking about the next time you can have him. Even as he lines his cock up with your entrance, pushing in slowly until he’s snug to your core, you’re thinking about how many more times you can take him. How many more ways you want to. 
You’ve barely started and you’re addicted. Craving him. Reaching a hand around behind you to cradle his head to the back of yours, feeling his warm breath fan your ear as he fucks you slowly. Delicate. Far too intimate for the two of you, almost strangers. 
If someone had told you two days ago that your night would start with locking eyes with Jungkook, a world-renowned artist, and end with securing a date that led to this moment, trembling in his arms as he makes you come again, you’d have thought they were crazy. 
Now, you can’t imagine it turning out any other way. Can’t imagine not feeling him shift his hand around to play with your clit, bringing you swiftly to another cresting orgasm, leaving you shaking and broken and near weeping in his arms, coming down from your high as he finishes himself off, cock twitching inside of you. 
Jungkook’s hand leaves your pussy, sliding up your stomach until he reaches the underside of your jaw. He grabs you, turning your face to his, stealing your mouth in a sloppy, searing kiss. 
“Mine,” he mumbles against your mouth between kisses. “Mine.” 
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Series Masterlist | Masterlist | Ask | Lights Playlist | Previous Episode | Tag Lists | Next Episode
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bendyartistic · 3 months ago
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Be Aware of alexbstudios. (Part 2) TW: uh.. slur, sui mention.
Recently I've been requested by some people to make another awareness post about Alex, and what has been going on since I made my last callout. So.. let's take a look. I'm gonna be honest I have been paying little to no attention to him at all since my post up until this point, didn't think I'd have to.
Ever since I made it, Alex has been talking about me a lot more, and it feels much more obsessive in a way. I think it's funny but also pretty weird considering some of the things he's said about me. Eugh.
Anyways let's get to the stuff from after my callout to the present. This is just a rundown of everything, and there is some stuff I skipped since I didn't feel it was worth mentioning. Once my post had been made, a lot of people went over and said stuff to him (Though I didn't encourage that behavior, I only wanted to make my post so people knew about him, I'm not covering those unless it's important in this.) Little afterwards he made this... post. Erh, are you stalking me and other people?? ALSO don't say the r slur man, like what.
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I find it really creepy that he has this list, and has notes along with them about why/who they are. Also why'd he spell my partners name like that? 💀 Next a little after that he reblogged someone's art and introduction saying this. (I don't want to really @ people in this, nor get anyone involved unless they asked to be.)
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I still don't understand how Alex views me, but saying this in a reblog no less is so strange. Reblogging another post, saying this with it...
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You're right Alex, I didn't need you in my life, yet here we are. Unfortunately. Besides that, no, 12 year old's should NOT be on Tumblr at all, even with restrictions, said restriction should be having the app blocked from their device.
I'm just gonna.. move on from that. Alex reblogged an art post, where he proceeded to @ over 50 people, myself included, saying "surely you can see the problem". I can't fit the entire thing sadly. I don't get what the point in these posts are honestly, besides annoy everyone. He's done it before as well. He got into a small bit of beef with a handful of folk not too long ago, which I got @'ed in at some point I think, didn't really pay much attention to it. Basically the original post is someone talking about art supplies and asking what one's other people use, which I personally think was a very neat post. Alex comes around though for some reason going off on nonsense. Hello? Who invited you!? (Again, censoring names cuz I don't want to get ppl involved.)
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I'm honestly kind of wondering why he even showed up. He pretty soon after made this dumb post as if it could have some effect on the situation.. uh?
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I guess mark your calendars guys for this date, where we have to immediately forget everything and forgive him! /j And there's this response he gave to an anon responding to his ✨patience✨ post.
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Dunno, so far it hasn't because he's still talking about it, so clearly he hasn't gotten over it enough to let it blow over.
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He's giving me those like.. stupid sigma edit vibes sometimes. Y'know what I'm talking about? Yeah. Also I'm not sure what to say about this really, but it's pretty funny.
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Context for this next one: You and the person on your lockscreen fight god..? That's a weird one.
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Wdym racist though? 🤨 Genuinely kinda curious about that. Btw wouldn't that make you like.. 9?? On a different note, I saw him previously talk about this "friend" he has going to a mental hospital, but I know nothing about it, nor do I really want to, however reblogging on an art post saying this feels off. Think the emotes are what do it.
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Don't joke about mental hospitals at all, I shouldn't have to explain why. I'm going to move on from all the short stuff now because I do wanna start talking instead of making short joking comments.
Alex made this post, and so it begins with him talking about me again, eh?
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Alex, you're already doomed. I can't put it any other way but from what I've seen maybe only 1 or 2 people even like you. The rest either hate you or want to avoid you at all cost, and I don't blame them at all considering you act like a fool and make everyone uncomfortable.
For my thoughts on you? I don't like you, never did. I just have to put up with you because this is the internet, and you'll probably never truly leave me alone like I once hoped. It's a shame honestly that you cannot follow a simple request from anyone. Don't think I don't know about your planned "response post" you're making, I'm still waiting for it. I don't know what good it's gonna do you though. Personally I don't care if you make one, I'd just read it to see the stuff you make up in it lol. (Edit: He decided to stop working on it after seeing this post lol.)
Enough of my rambling, I should continue with this so I can stop talking about him sooner. Regrettably I had to actually look up what this was about, I felt.. iffy reading it.
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Saying gyatt right afterwards wasn't funny. At all. I'm quite upset now. There was absolutely no reason for that.
I was gonna be reasonable and say something genuine but I don't feel like it anymore, this ruined my mood. All I have to say is as much as I dislike you, don't actually do that. Sadly moving to the next nonsensical thing, he made a poll post asking this. (It's still ongoing btw)
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Are people like.. forced into giving a reason? Like if I for example chose Bendy, am I immediately supposed to state my reasons? What if I don't want to, are we being held at gunpoint? What's up with that? I'm too lazy to interact with the post, I don't really feel like it anyways even if I wasn't lazy. Which one would you choose though lol I'm going to be serious now again cause this last thing is really just.. what the fuck. Palestine related 🍉, someone asking for help came to Alex, and this was his response to it...
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MY GOD Alex. Did you really have to respond to that in this immature, insensitive fucking manner? Could it have not been in one of your stupid rambling posts. It should've been. I'm sorry to the person and I'm sorry I had to read it. You're pretty sick honestly. You need help.
That's it. I'm done.
In conclusion:
Alex is still the same and is still never going to change probably. He still shouldn't be here and I believe he really should get off now more than ever. If not I fear what else he might do next.
All I can really tell you folks is please, DNI with Alex, just leave him alone and block him. You're again not obligated to, but I am suggesting it if you want to be left alone by him. And hey, maybe you'll make it onto his dumb creepy list too, who knows. Alright, I'm finished, I stayed up way too late for this... I'm tired. Cya.
Reblogs are much appreciated, it helps spread the word, thanks.
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project-sekai-facts · 2 months ago
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Hey I'm the anon from this ask (https://www.tumblr.com/project-sekai-facts/764142926583431168/im-curious-why-you-feel-confident-in-saying-that?source=share) just wanted to say thank you so much for the response!! After reading that and more carefully rereading the stuff in the original mizuki trans post I agree with what you're saying about it being pretty much explicitly confirmed in-game Because of the many bad faith interpretations of my ask I wanted to explain where it came from a bit. I had just come out of listening to another friend doompost/get annoyed about the "vagueness" of the event story and how it wasn't settling the trans vs crossdresser "debate" (heavy quotes there) when I saw the new reblog you made to the mizuki trans post with the line of her being explicitly transgender.
I wanted to hear where you got that from because it was also the impression that I got after reading the story but I was struggling with putting it into words when talking with said friend - honestly i probably could have phrased the ask better but oh well that's tumblr for you.
I've always read her as trans but I've weird feelings about what "being canon" means for a long time hence my fears about jumping the gun - I tended to see it as "you need to have complete 100% proof that it's true that can rebuke all bad faith arguments, and if it doesn't you can accept it as a popular headcanon with some canon support but don't go implying that it's canon" but putting it into words like that makes me realize that that's not a good approach. And just seeing you repeatedly say things like mizuki being in-text confirmed to be trans for 4 years has helped me feel more confident in that and reassess my relationship with canonity in general so genuinely, thank you so much for that.
P.S. damn that ended up being much longer than i thought this was going to be lol. if you don't want to post this for whatever reason that's understandable, don't feel obligated to
No problem! And I'm really sorry for the flack people were giving you in the tags you literally said you wanted Mizuki to be trans in your ask. It's probably because of my response being pretty general and not necessarily directed at you for the most part; i had gotten like 4 other asks about "what are the chances mizuki is a crossdresser" so I just picked one to answer.
I mean yeah technically for it to be 100% canon it should be explicitly stated, but I tend to go off the rules that so long as there's enough sub/textual evidence and very little room for doubt, it's good as canon. Like when I said before that An and Kohane have canon romantic feelings - it's never been said outright but the evidence to prove it with little doubt is there. Technically the term canon refers to a series of works that take place in the same universe, but in fandom the term is often used to describe if character traits or ships are official or not. So Mizuki technically isn't officially a trans girl until they change the gender marker on her bio, but this event removed what little room there was for doubt, so I at the very least would consider it to be canon.
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transmascaraa · 5 months ago
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Hihi Nyx!! ^^ As i said i wanted to req for dgr (i think that is danganronpa but if isn't just ignore that lol) :P
Can i request for Kyoko, Kokichi, Korekiyo, Byakuya, Celeste and Nagito with a male s/o that acts like a watchdog around them?
Like, the others are scared of him because of his explosive temper and rude/egocentric attitude but with their s/o he is the nicest and clingy person ever and kinda pawn to them too, also he always do anything to make their partner happy, like: people are making fun of their partner? No problem, he will gladly blackmail that person so that shit never happens again.
-☠️🎀 anon xoxo!!
multiple characters headcannons!
"don't judge a book by it's cover.", they say.
characters: kokichi, korekiyo, byakuya, celestia, nagito x m!reader
author's note: yup it's danganronpa dw^^ anyways sure! i love the prompt tho and the idea it's literally chef's kiss to me lmfao (i was planning to finish both of the remaining reqs rn so yeah basically they'll be open in AT LEAST a few hours so yeah) ENJOY EVERYONEEEE
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☆ Kokichi
-so in public you're js a guy that people look at and then immediately turn to their friends to whisper to them "he looks so scary..." or smthn
-and kokichi would ofc notice that
-he would either giggle to himself or actually just yell at them
-"HEY WHO THE HELL ARE YOU CALLING SCARY??!!!??!??!?"
-to the point where you have to drag him away with the most aggressive expression on your face
-people probably don't believe you when you say you're dating much because they think you abuse him or smthn
-but when at home, and you're literally a clingy golden-retriever typa bf, he loves gossiping with you about all those reactions from people in public
-that mischievous idiot will mostly lie to people if anything, like "you won't believe me how scary he is...... he sleeps hugging a knife instead of me!!!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
◉ Korekiyo
-i hope he won't be too ooc
-ANYWAYS so
-it depends if you want people knowing your personality change/difference or not
-like if you want them to know, he will genuinely try to convince them but the thing is that he'll probably add teasing remarks wether you like it or not
-the same goes for if gou don't want them to know, again, he'll do his best to hide your clingy bf side
-if he hears people saying smthn like "look at that guy.... he looks as if he just killed someone.."
-i swear i see him turning around for 2 seconds to look at them, then continue walking with you after saying loud enough for them to hear "yes he may have, and you're probably next."
-he will scare people off using that watchdog vibe that you apparently give to people
-prefers being alone w you tho
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✷ Byakuya
-oh this guys is a menace(not complaining)
-he has overheard countless shit about people saying "guys..... is that THE byakuya togami?!!??!? why is he walking with that creepy looking guy?"
-and uh he ignores them but definitely makes a grimace at it
-if he's directly talking to someone with you there, and they ask something like "why are you so tense, [name]? chill out a bit......"
-he will literally give them the biggest side-eye ever.
-"if only they were always like that.." he might quietly say but nobody knows.
-when alone, he sometimes wishes he was in public rather than with clingy you.
-don't get either me or him wrong, he loves your affection deep down, but yk him enough to know that he at least has a limit to it all
-kinda hard to be in a relationship w him at all if you think about it but yes????
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✧ Celestia
-love this woman sm i swear
-okay she's the perfect option allow me to explain and rant about why(i just realized how much i love this woman)
-she LOVES you
-SO fucking much especially like this
-idk if it comes off as ooc to others but to me? she absolutely adores it.
-she loves how you're really protective and would probably kill countless people and go through a million executions just you defend her
-but the thing that she loves more about it is that others don't realize it
-they see you more as someone who would kill everyone, celestia, and then yourself.
-if she overheards people making rumors or smthn while walking with you, she would giggle to herself and then tell you about it all
-loves you in both public and private
-but in private you treat her as how a prince treats his princess so she feels extra special then
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✿ Nagito
-alright so this guy
-first of all good luck on getting into a relationship w him cuz it's gonna be tricky due to his nonexistent self-esteem and that
-especially with how you look in public
-when he first saw you he thought "that guy will never look my way.." and was probably scared af when you asked him what was his name
-if people make remarks about it in public, he would most not say anything and just tell you everything by whispering to you
-but if he decides to reply to them in any way, he might say something like "you don't know him enough to call him that, don't assume what people are like just by their appearance." and that's literally it
-so mostly you don't pay any mind to it, neither does he
-but LOVES being in private with you when you shower him with compliments and praise no matter how much he denies all of them
-loves you to the point it might become an obsession but yk if you know him enough it doesn't seem weird much
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
really like how i did this one
not sure about korekiyo since i don't really like the guy lol but i tried my best
and finally ofc i celestia is a work of art i love women sm it is not okay anymore
| @mariaace <3
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restinslices · 11 months ago
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Hi I’m the anon who asked about the popstar one! (Loved what you did btw) If it wasn’t too much of a problem I love if you could do the Lin Kuei boys + Syzoth too!
Me finally getting to my requests?! Who would’ve thought. Everyone got around 300 words besides Syzoth, who got 400. Why? No further questions.
Bi-Han
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You can change him? Well I can accept him as he is! You don’t like the murders? Grow up! The atrocities are a part of him and I’ve decided they’re funny :D
I know the Lin Kuei are a part of Earthrealm but are they allowed to have technology? 
For the sake of this, imma say technology is very very limited 
With that being said, what do you mean you're a pop star? It's not that he doesn't know what it is, he just doesn't get why. All the things you could be doing and popstar is where you landed 
I don't wanna make it seem like everyone is supportive but him but this is Bi-Han. He's going to judge 
He's the Grandmaster so he's always busy. Going to concerts isn't happening and honestly? He doesn't give me the vibes of someone who's a fan of concerts 
He doesn't hate your job, he just genuinely doesn't get it 
Remember how I said Kung Lao will give you brutally honest advice? Same goes for him. You can always trust the truth to come outta him (unless it's about the father he let die but anyway)
I don't see him doing anything special. I don't see him buying posters or tickets or streaming or concerts. He cares for you but doesn't see the need to do all that. 
If he did stream he'd probably just put the video on repeat on his phone and go do other shit. At the same time though, do they even have cell service? Where is Lin Kuei HQ??
Absolutely refuses to add ice or snow to your set for an MV. Be a team player. Damn. Stop thinking everything is beneath you.
“That is entirely beneath me” “aight, I guess you don’t want me beneath you”
He apologizes for his outburst (I was making that joke happen by any means necessary)
I just think he's the most nonchalant about dating a celebrity. Probably forgets you're a popstar
Loses a piece of his sanity everytime a Lin Kuei ninja loses their mind over you. Actually wants to join his father in the afterlife. How y'all even seeing these performances? Y'all sneaking off?!
You're disturbing his peace but hey, it is what it is 
Kuai Liang
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Also doesn't understand why that job, but he's less judgmental than Bi-Han. Not everyone can defend Earthrealm. 
I also don't see him doing a lot. He's busy and also he's just not interested in being around a bunch of sweaty ass fans. Nothing against you 
If he did buy your merch I think he'd set it in like, a box. He only bought it to be supportive. He's not gonna hang it up or anything. To be honest, he might give it to the rest of the guys (Johnny, Kenshi, Kung Lao, Raiden and Liu Kang)
I see the Lin Kuei as private and not really interactive when it comes to normal citizens so I honestly don't know what to say for them 😭
I don't even know if Kuai Liang likes pop music. Him and Bi-Han give me the vibes of someone who listens to white noise to past time 
Like Bi-Han, he's nonchalant about the whole celebrity thing. 
Probably doesn't even have a phone. He probably got an old ass mp3 player. What are you doing with that?
If your songs are more calm and chill, I can see him liking it when you sing while he does something 
Popstars wear dramatic ass outfits and this is definitely when he starts judging you 
“How does it look?” “It… looks”
He's used to practical outfits so I think he subconsciously spots all the ways your outfits could injure you 
“You could be easily spotted” “That's the whole point”
Will he add fire to an MV for background effects? Possibly. He has to have nothing else to do and be absolutely bored out of his mind to do so. Bi-Han says no out of spite and “this is beneath me”. Kuai Liang initially says no and has the same “this is beneath me” thought process, but he folds easier. There's certain things he is absolutely not doing though
“I am not saying 'get over here’ for you” “You're so not fun”
This relationship feels like a hostage situation but oh well
Tomas Vrbada 
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He wants to be as stern and serious as his brothers but we all know I babygirlify him so it's not happening 
He doesn't have a phone but he asks Johnny to use his and have your shit on repeat for the views 
Idk why but I feel like he's a Twice stan so he's no stranger to pop music. I have no reliable sources for this 
I could see him buying pins and keeping them in his pocket since he can't have it on his outfit 
I don't think for any of the brothers, your fans would know you're dating which is something they'd want. They're assassins. They can't be all over the internet. 
Doesn't go to concerts because he can't. Such a sad life 
Gives background smoke for effects cause he's a team player 
Wants to be the first to hear anything you're working on 
Gives you honest advice but nicely 
I think he has conflicting feelings about you always being in the spotlight. He loves that you're happy but is also worried because that comes with danger and if smth were to happen, there's a good chance he wouldn't be there 
I feel like Tomas can lowkey sing (once again no reliable sources present) so karaoke? karaoke. 
You could talk him into doing a collab but it'd never be released. It'd just be for you two 
He wants to keep up with everything you're doing as it's happening but once again, no phone. Instead he just checks in with you whenever he sees you 
The most aware out of the brothers that he's dating a celebrity. 
Probably the brother you'd feel the most supported by because he's the most expressive (?). He makes his support very known and doesn't question why you're doing what you're doing 
He doesn't give me as much Ken energy as Johnny does, but he still gives me “Ken only has a great day if Barbie looks at him”. Like I said for Johnny, you're Barbie regardless of gender 
Syzoth
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Does Zaterra or Outworld even have popstars? For comedy sake, imma say not exactly 
He was ran out of Zaterra and he was working for Shang Tsung, so even if they do he had no time to actually enjoy music 
So when he hears you're a popstar, he has no idea what you're talking about. You have to genuinely explain what your job is, what you do, what's a tour, what's merch, etc. etc. 
Like the Lin Kuei Bros, he has no phone. He doesn't understand technology at all. He's like a grandpa fr, so his interactions with your music is slim to none when it comes to music videos 
Explain it to him as many times as you want. He doesn't get it. 
You have to actually show him the video on your phone. You have to show him any merch you have so he can pick whatever he wants and you can sneak it to him 
Prefers you singing for him live rather than watching a music video but he watches them anyway because you're really proud of them 
Like Tomas, he likes little pins or other little trinkets 
Since he was in a traveling circus, he knows what performing is but you're getting paid and treated fairly which he finds fantastic 
He is slightly worried tho from his time being in said circus. You have to explain that they're two different things (sorta, not really) and you're ok 
Has no idea what's going on but is supportive anyway
He tries really hard to understand Earthrealm customs and culture to better understand you. Is he successful? Probably depends on the subject 
He doesn't get merch at all or why it's so stupidly expensive. If you weren't giving it to him for free, he probably wouldn't buy it to be honest. He likes that you're proud of how it looks but why is it necessary for success? He just doesn't understand it 
Concerts he somewhat gets. The idea is cute but once he sees videos of people fainting, he swears he's never going to one of those 
Does not want your fans to know you're dating him. Does not want to be in any of your videos as himself or a lizard. Wants nothing to do with the spotlight. He has trauma with being known. 
It'll take awhile to explain to him what fan culture and memes are, but he's ready to learn for you. 
Idk if I wanna write more silly shit or angst shit. I guess we’ll find out next episode
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butchpeace · 5 days ago
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hi there! thank you so much for you're response to my anon ask- i was honestly expecting you to mock me and then tell me im in a cult and am bringing down other women- which is the response i usually get when trying to ask radfem blogs things- i understand why they would say this but i am asking questions genuinely. I've looked through the medical articles linked in your page, I'll be honest it is concerning but currently I am enjoying the physical and mental changes on testosterone and dont want that to stop- obviously while paying attention to my body and working with my doctor if any issues occur. i think i'll talk about doses with my doctor to understand what options i have when i want to taper off or vaguely slow down, i hope my approach to medical transition isnt seen as aggravating or flippant this is just my general philosophy about things :) i dont know i kinda feel like crying this is kinda the first radfem space i have felt safe in?
i enjoy having a deep voice- being hairy, being flat chested and these are all things women can do-- i feel that my decisions to get a mastectomy and be on hormones to achieve this shouldnt be used to kick me out of butch spaces but maybe im just being naive 🤷
A lot of radfems have that knee jerk reaction to trans identified women. Those are the kinds of people who pushed me away from radical feminism before I transitioned, so I know how that feels!
There aren’t a lot of people who both identify with radical feminism and also have the empathy and understanding needed to help us work through our gender issues. My goal is to be the person I needed back then.
My viewpoint is that people have a wide variety of different feelings about their gender, but at its core it all comes down to the same thing: The inability to accept our bodies as they are.
That’s something butch women particularly have been dealing with for a very long time. Of course butches want to be more masculine. Why wouldn’t we? We live in a patriarchy, and physical masculinity and androgyny is considered attractive in butches.
But my opinion is that accepting our bodies as they are should be the ultimate goal, and that messing with our hormonal systems and having cosmetic surgeries is objectively a negative thing. Not just because of health risks, but also because it’s a way of rejecting femaleness. I believe that all forms of rejecting the female aspects of our bodies come from misogyny. Because of that, giving in to the pressure to change our bodies isn’t a positive thing in the big picture, even if it makes us feel subjectively better about ourselves.
But I feel that way about all cosmetic surgery, including botox and all the other things women do to alter themselves. I don’t think that the way we’ve altered ourselves is any different from what they’re doing. I’m against all of it, but I don’t see us as the problem, I see patriarchy as the problem.
Whether radfems agree with it or not, the fact is that many butch women have taken hormones and have had mastectomies, and we are still women. Testosterone and mastectomies are so widespread among butch women these days that it’s kinda just part of who we are at this point. That doesn’t mean it’s a good thing or that it should be encouraged, and people have the right to criticize it. But we should be accepted.
Our appearances are altered but that doesn’t change who we are, and it doesn’t change the fact that we need community and a sense of belonging.
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mamawasatesttube · 1 month ago
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I feel so shy not being able to hide in the anon asks but for the sake of desperation I'll ask anyway.
First of all I must say that I love the way you express yourself, because even though you are against some things, or at least you don't like them. You express it so well and so respectful that's addicting.
Anyway the questions were what you thought about Tim+Kon+Bernard, because I've seen a lot of people talking about it but I don't know if it makes much sense if you think of their relationship.
Also if you had some songs that reminded you of Kon I'd love the recs! Because I'm still a newbie in the whole DC comics, but I've been having a Kon brain rot for a while.
Sorry if I don't express myself correctly, English isn't my first language. If any of this makes you uncomfy please feel free of ignoring me and I hope you have plenty of good days!!💕💕 Be careful to not catch a cold
aww thank you that's very sweet of you to say!!! :D i do love to simply start talking and rambling all the time. one of my top skills. (and yeah i turned off anon asks a while ago because unfortunately talking about racism in fandom often gets you labelled a bitch with a terrible personality 😔✊ alas!)
as for tim/kon/bernard ... i really, really dislike that ship. it takes everything i already strongly dislike about tim/ber (tim drake: robin is the worst comic i've ever read, and i'm including jeph loeb's supergirl when i say this), and multiplies it by a factor of about 500.
my biggest problem with tim/ber is that megfitz wrote them with absolutely no actual chemistry. there is nothing in the text to tell me why they actually like each other. there is nothing in the text that tells me what the issues in their relationship are, or how they might grow together as people, or anything. which is absolutely insane because you'd think "bernard knows tim's secret identity, but has not told tim that he knows" would be a MAJOR point of conflict, but instead it's just completely glossed over to the point of the comic asking us to accept that the bats would ever allow a mob of random civilians on a mission with them. there's stretching suspension of disbelief, and then there's putting suspension of disbelief on the medieval torture rack and tearing it apart. like. come ON. (tdr is also like. teehee gentrification but its cute? which is insane to me in a different way. its just. its so bad. its such a bad comic.)
so adding kon to that mix kind of gives me hives because a) we have all of my issues with tdr being incredibly inconsistent, both internally and with all existing tim characterization ever, and b) it brings up all of my issues with how kon has been written since yj2019. which i could get into Yet Again but in the interests of being at least a little bit concise, it's also incredibly inconsistent and drives me bonkers. so the concept of this ship just makes me go "why the FUCK" because i just truly genuinely cannot fathom why kon and bernard would ever give a shit about each other. i can barely even fathom why tim and bernard give a shit about each other because megfitz did the comic script equivalent of picking up two barbie dolls and mashing them together and going LOOK THEYRE IN LOVE. they have no consistent characterization under her pen.
so adding kon into that just makes me want to tear my hair out a little bit because. like. to be entirely honest i don't know how some random dude from one of tim's many high schools who tim was friendly with, sure, but not particularly close with, can hold a candle to Whatever The Fuck Tim And Kon Have Going On. especially with how flat their relationship reads to me in tdr (what do they even like about each other??? why is bernard in fucking biophysics or whatever while wanting to be a chef??? why does tim not go "you know culinary school exists right??" when he finds out??? how am i supposed to believe that tim "duty" drake would ever leave people in a burning building just for his sad boyfriend??? that batman and co would ever let a bunch of civilians fight alongside them - or for that matter, that they'd need bernard to tell them tim's in trouble?? what the fuck alternate dimension are they from where any of this makes sense???). tim/ber just is such a nothing ship to me that adding kon to it is just like. EXTREME nothing. to me tim/ber/kon is basically a flag that says "i don't care about characterization" and it's just so very deeply NOT my thing at all whatsoever.
...which is why to ME tim's first boyfriend is ives, not bernard, and in this essay i will--
ahem. anyways!! re: kon songs, oh man i have a lot. i have a whole playlist even. with a linked document to explain every song choice. i also lately have been thinking about making a second playlist for all the songs that didn't make it onto the first one!! much to consider.
also don't worry your english is totally fine ♥ and it's very sweet of you to wish me well healthwise and also a little funny because actually i am just getting over a cold that had me sniffly and miserable most of last week. but i'm much better tonight so yippee!! thank you again :D
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sniigura-archive · 4 months ago
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Adam x Reader x Mammon AU anon again.
You: You should be writing fic instead of me anon!
Also You: *Expands upon my idea in ways I didn't think of and once again proving to me you're an amazing writer <3*
READER GETTING PREGNANT TERTGDFTHYFGTHFV YESSSSS
I feel like Reader would refuse to find out who the father is cuz she KNOWS it would be a shitshow with these two either way (one claiming "ownership" of her and the kid and the other making her life miserable because of it), so as such Adam and Mammon are both the Dad That Stepped Up(tm).
They def fight over whether or not Reader should get an abortion early on (neither of them believe in women having agency over their bodies *sobs*). Adam's so offended cuz he doesn't believe in abortion and is like "how could you suggest murdering my baby????" and Mammon's like "it's a clump of cells and I can't have a pregnant bitch riding a pole" he needs Reader back to work asap. Reader decides on her own to keep it ONLY if they promise to not make her life hell for it (or else bye bye snu snu). Mammon begrudgingly gives her paid leave and Adam begrudgingly accepts that Reader is keeping her job.
When the baby comes the men def both spoil the shit out of them. Adam happily offers to babysit/help out with anything no questions asked, Mammon gives Reader all the money she needs and more for the baby and buying the kid all the best toys and clothes. Reader has the main authority on how the kid will be raised (she does not want her kid to end up like either of them lmao) and the boys just gotta accept it like Yes Ma'am.
WAHHH THANK UU but if you ever need help to like brain storm stuff for a fanfic im your man my dms are always open for that i love going through ideas so much RAHHH
mammon: i can’t have a pregnant bitch riding the pole
adam: why not? pregnant bitches are hot as fuck
reader fighting off pregnancy nausea: can you both leave now pls
reader is so done with these sexists guys 😭 she’s aware that technically she doesn’t need them and she can just leave for another city. she has made enough good financial decisions to make her be able to live a comfortable life with her child with no problems
reader says neither of them will be the father and then they’re like „who else were you fucking 🤨🤨🤨“ NO ONE YOURE JUSZ ANNOYING!!!! reader is lucky the baby is her carbon copy other wise both of them would throw hands with each other
adam probably says it’s his since she has been with mammon for longer and all it takes is one night with him to get knocked up because he’s just that good
i think it’d be interesting once reader is too far along to continue working at the club if that’s when glitz and glam make an appearance. they really want to steal that spot of being favourites with all the benefits. they’re very willing to fill in all the spots. mammon considers it for a hot sec but then he visits reader and is pissed the fuck off that he actually genuinely likes reader. the realisation hits him like a truck
adam and mammon refuse to acknowledge that they’re basically in a poly relationship now with you. they get along surprisingly well as long as the topic isn’t you and the baby. as soon as it’s about you and the baby they remember they are Sworn Enemies
but it also gets very annoying for reader when they agree on something because they’re soo stubborn 😭 poor woman. should have moved away lmaoo
THEM AS DADS!!! precious as fuck. imagine if it’s a girl shishsjs girl dads…….little girl who looks like reader so she has wrapped them around her finger. who can say no to such a cute face 😔
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