#All the lights going dark and my hope’s destroyed

[shimaa20sblog]

"Everything Was Lost in an Instant 😓💔"

I am Shimaa, from Gaza, a 20-year-old Computer Science student. Life once carried many dreams and ambitions for me. I was preparing to build my future in the field of technology, dreaming of developing myself to serve my community. But in an instant, all of my dreams and hopes were destroyed as my home was completely demolished due to the war.

I lost everything. I now have nothing but the memories that the walls of our home once held, a place that used to be our refuge. Amid the rubble, years of hard work and perseverance vanished, and the dreams I had were wiped out. Yet, hope still remains in my heart, and I believe that life will give me another chance, despite the challenges.

I am now in need of your support to give me the opportunity to stand up once again, to continue my studies, and to rebuild what the war has destroyed. Every donation, no matter how small, will be a glimmer of light in the dark days I have gone through. I need your help to move forward in my education, to achieve my dreams, and to rebuild my life from scratch.

My faith in God, and then in all of you, is what keeps me holding on to hope. Thank you to everyone who can stand by my side during these difficult times.

@halalgirlmeg @im-smart-i-swear @wellwaterhysteria @bartholomew-junior @thecoffeedesk @dogbound1128 @stupid-dumb-bitch@fancysmudges @brokenbackmountain @anyonghalimaw @zigcarnivorous @aleciosun @fluoresensitivearchive @khizuo @schoolhater @timogsilangan @appsa @buttercuparry @sayruq @malcriada @palestinegenocide @sar-soor @akajustmerry @annoyingloudmicrowavecultist @feluka-blog-blog @tortiefrancis @feluka @flower-tea-fairies @tsaricides @riding-with-the-wild-hunt @visenyasdragon @belleandsaintsebastian @ear-motif @kordeliiius @brutaliakent @raelyn-dreams @troythecatfish @theropoda @tamarrud @4ft10tvlandfangirl @queerstudiesnatural @northgazaupdates2 @skatezophrenic @awetistic-things @camgirlpanopticon @baby-girl-aaron-dessner @nabulsi @sygutka @junglejim4322 @heritageposts @chososhairbrush @palistani @dlxxv-vetted-donations @imjustheretotrytohelp @mnty-bubblegmyum ... I need your help to ensure my message reaches as many people as possible. The war in Gaza has destroyed my life and dreams, and I believe there are those who can help me rebuild what I've lost. If you could share my story or support it, I would be very grateful. I want to be a voice for those who have none, and I need support and donations to achieve my dreams and return to my studies. Together, we can change reality and restore hope to those in need.

[yngikr]

what if?

what if suguru had turned around?

tw- hinting at depressed suguru

(lol i kinda hate this but whatever. tears falling out of my satosugu eyes so im trying to cope.)

*

the rain fell softly that evening, the kind that didn’t soak you but left a chill clinging to your skin. satoru stood just outside the kfc, his hands shoved into his pockets, waiting for something he wasn’t even sure would come. the last words he and suguru had exchanged echoed in his mind, sharp and painful. suguru had turned his back on him—on everything—and yet, satoru couldn’t let it end like that. not tonight. 

inside, the quiet hum of the lights above was drowned out by the storm brewing between the two of them. suguru sat at a booth by the window, staring down at the untouched drink in front of him. he looked thinner than satoru remembered, his usually sharp eyes dulled, his shoulders slumped as though the weight of his own convictions was crushing him. 

satoru had always known suguru carried burdens—ones he couldn’t quite understand. but this? this was different. there was something broken in him now, something hollow. and satoru hated it. 

he stepped inside, his presence loud even in his silence, and suguru didn’t even look up. for a moment, satoru hesitated, unsure of what to say, unsure if words could even reach the man who had been his everything. but he refused to let this silence stretch into a goodbye. 

“i can’t do this, suguru,” satoru said finally, his voice soft but firm, like a wave lapping at the shore. “i can’t just watch you destroy yourself.” 

suguru’s head lifted slightly, his dark eyes meeting satoru’s for the first time in what felt like years. there was a flicker of something there—regret, perhaps, or hope—but it was quickly buried beneath the weight of his resolve. “i don’t need saving, satoru,” he muttered, though the words lacked conviction. “you can’t fix this.” 

satoru stepped closer, pulling out the chair across from him and sitting down. his sunglasses were off, his cerulean eyes laid bare. they were piercing but soft, full of an understanding that suguru hadn’t allowed himself to see before. “i’m not trying to fix you,” satoru said, his voice low. “i just want to help you carry it.” 

suguru flinched as if the words had physically struck him. for so long, he’d carried this darkness alone, convinced that no one could understand, that no one could shoulder the things he’d seen, the things he’d done. but here was satoru, stubborn and unrelenting, offering his hand once again. 

and for the first time in years, suguru hesitated. 

“what do you want from me, satoru?” he asked, his voice cracking slightly. 

satoru leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table, his expression unusually serious. “i want you to stop running from me. from us. you’re not alone, suguru. you never were.” 

the weight of the words hit suguru harder than any curse ever could. he wanted to believe him, wanted to believe that after everything he’d done, after all the lives he’d taken and all the blood on his hands, he could still be someone worth saving. 

and then he thought of the emptiness, the loneliness that had consumed him for so long. the nights spent staring at the ceiling, wishing for a hand to pull him out of the darkness. maybe… maybe it didn’t have to be this way. 

slowly, suguru stood. for a moment, satoru tensed, afraid he would walk away again. but instead, suguru moved toward him, his steps tentative but deliberate. when he stopped in front of him, satoru tilted his head up, looking at him with an expression suguru couldn’t quite place. 

“i don’t know if i can do this,” suguru admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. “i don’t know if i can be the person you want me to be.” 

satoru smiled softly, reaching out to clasp suguru’s hand in his own. “then don’t. just be you. that’s all i’ve ever wanted.” 

for the first time in years, suguru allowed himself to believe him. allowed himself to let go of the anger, the guilt, and the pain that had kept him shackled. and as the rain continued to fall outside, satoru stood, pulling suguru into an embrace that felt more like home than anything suguru had ever known. 

“we’ll figure this out together,” satoru whispered, his voice steady, a promise. 

and in that moment, suguru turned away from the abyss and back toward the light. toward satoru. 

they left the kfc together, the storm giving way to a calm, as though the world itself had taken a deep breath. suguru didn’t know what the future held, but for the first time, he wasn’t afraid to face it. 

as they walked down the empty street, side by side, satoru glanced at suguru and smiled. it wasn’t the cocky grin suguru had grown so used to, but something softer, something real. 

and for the first time in a very long time, suguru smiled back. 

[vodika-vibes]

Hello! Can I request a little fic where the Reader (GN) is with Mereel and they're kind of the opposite of him in personality (quiet, a little more reserved in public, a little more hesitant) and they're worried they won't measure up to him in the long term?

They just think he's so great and charming and charismatic that people seem to trip over themselves just to talk to him (in Legends, he has a reputation among his brothers for being a bit of a ladies' man/flirt), and it makes them wonder if they deserve to be with him.

So, they voice their insecurities to him bc communication is important and he assures them that he only wants them.

Thank you in advance!

Opposites Attract

Summary: Mereel is everything you ever wanted with a partner, but you’re not blind to your differences. And sometimes you can’t help but wonder what he sees in you.

Pairing: Mereel Skirata x GN!Reader

Word Count: 1226

Warnings: Reader is self-conscious about their relationship

A/N: This is a good request, I love it. But I also love Mereel! Thanks for making it~

Click HERE to be added to my taglist

You don’t like parties. They’re too loud, and there’s too many people, and you never know what to say to them. It’s not like you’re the most interesting person in the world, after all.

And so, every time  you come to one of these parties, you find a comfortable place in a corner, near a window, and you read something on your comm or play a game, and you just wait until the party is over.

This has never been your scene. 

You’ve always been a little more quiet than your peers. More reserved. More hesitant. You wouldn’t be surprised if none of your old classmates even remembered your name, let alone your face.

The only reason you come to these parties is because of Mereel. Your boyfriend is an extrovert, not to mention he’s handsome and charismatic. It’s no surprise to you that people trip over themselves to get to talk to him.

It’s also no surprise to you that he’s so popular with women at these parties. No doubt more than one of these women are hoping that he’ll take them home for the night. 

There was a time he would, after all.

Though he hasn’t done that since he started dating you.

Your gaze lifts from your comm, and the book that you’re reading, and you find Mereel with ease. As you expect, he’s surrounded by women, and men, who seem to be doing their best to win his attention.

You don’t blame them. 

Mereel is gorgeous, after all. He looks especially good in the loose fitting tee-shirt and jeans you bought him. 

A tiny smile lifts your lips when his gaze meets yours, and he tosses you a grin and a wink, before he continues talking to his adoring audience. 

You really do love him so much. You love him when he’s being charming, you love him when he’s being goofy, and you love him when he’s being annoying.

But, the more you go to these parties, and the more you see how Mereel interacts with the people around him, and the more you see just how popular Mereel is, you can’t help but wonder if maybe he deserves better than you. Or, maybe you don’t deserve to be with someone so amazing.

You know that some of his friends here think that you’re not good enough for Mereel. They haven’t been shy about making comments to you. Though lately it’s become much more subtle.

It’s only a matter of time before Mereel starts getting invited to these parties with a note asking him to leave you behind when he comes to these parties. 

And then what?

Your best guess is that Mereel will realize that you don’t fit this lifestyle, and he'll apologize to you as he breaks up with you, and then you’ll have to find a new job because watching him hook-up with his flavor of the week would destroy you.

You jump when a light, familiar, hand landson the top of your head. Mereel is standing over you, a worried look on his handsome face, though it quickly turns into a warm smile when you shoot him a bewildered look.

“You alright, cyare?”

You nod, even more confused, “Yes?”

His dark eyes scan your face, looking for…what, you aren’t sure, but after a long 30 seconds his hand moves from the top of your head to cup your cheek, “Let’s get out of here,” Mereel says after a moment, “I’m starving.”

You squint at him suspiciously, “Are you sure? You looked like you were having fun.”

For a moment, he looks like he wants to say something, but instead he just grins and brushes his thumb across your cheekbone, “Yeah, cyare. I’m ready to get out of here.” He offers you his hand, “Come on.”

You watch him for a moment, and then you take his hand and allow him to tug you to your feet. You’re not going to complain about being able to leave this party early. 

You hope he’s feeling alright, though. He never wants to leave these things early.

Mereel tugs you out of the house, and into the brisk air of the night, his hand tight around yours. Not so tight that he’s hurting you, but tight enough that you have the feeling that he wants you close.

After several minutes of quiet walking, you bump your shoulder against him, “Are you feeling alright?” You ask, “You never want to leave those parties early.”

He glances at you, “Yeah, I’m fine.”

You stare at him, doubtfully.

Mereel laughs softly, “Really, cyare. I promise I’m feeling fine.”

“Alright, if you say so.”

Several minutes later he stops and turns you so that he’s able to take both of your hands in his, “Cyare,” Mereel squeezes your hands and then brings them to his lips to kiss your knuckles, “Are you alright?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

“You looked sad at the party,” He explains.

“Oh, that.” You shrug, “I was just thinking.”

“What about?”

“How long before your friends start asking you to leave me behind when you go to these parties,”

“They wouldn’t.” You shoot him a look, and Mereel has the grace to look sheepish, “They might ask but I wouldn’t do that.”

You sigh softly, and slowly thread your fingers with his, “Mereel,” You hesitate, trying to think of how you want to phrase this, “I know I’m not like you.” You finally say, “I’m quieter, more reserved…”

“Cyare, that doesn’t bother me.”

“You deserve better than me and everyone knows it.” You blurt.

Mereel stares at you for a moment, “No one thinks that, cyare.”

“You don’t hear how your friends talk about me when you aren’t around.” You correct him quietly, “And they aren’t exactly welcoming to me.”

He’s quiet for a moment, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

You shrug again, “They’re your friends.”

He releases your hands and cups your face, “You’re more important to me.” Mereel leans in and bumps his forehead against yours, “Do I want to know what they say about you?”

“Probably not.” You admit.

He scans your face again, “Okay. Then we won’t go to those parties anymore.”

You blink at him, surprised, “You don’t have to.”

“I love you.” Mereel counters, his voice serious, “I don’t want to spend my time with people who make you feel bad for being you.” He gently tilts your head back so he’s able to brush his lips against yours, “You are my choice. Always.”

“Even though I’m not like you?”

“If I wanted to date someone who was like me, then I wouldn’t have asked you out on a date. And I wouldn’t have moved in with you.” Mereel counters, very logically.

“Your logic is illegal when I’m feeling self-conscious.”

Mereel laughs and kisses you again, and then again, “Alright. If my logic is illegal, how about we go home and I show you just how much I love you.”

“I thought you were hungry?”

His grin widens, “Starved.”

Your face heats as you note the way he’s looking at you, “Well, I guess we should head home then.” You reply.

And Mereel laughs before he catches your lips again. You’re not worried about your place in his life anymore…though you might be a little worried about what he’s going to do to his former friends.

@imabeautifulbutterfly

@n0vqni

@bad4amficideas

@justiceandwar98

@mira-loves-star-wars

@tiredbi-peach

@dukeoftheblackstar

@trixie2023

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@falconfeather23435

@etod

@bb8-99

@kiss-anon

@continous-mistakes

@yoitsjay

@liz-stat

@cc--2224

@adriennelenoir

@cdblake1565

@heidnspeak

@wax-birds

@silly-starfish

@lonewolflupe

@maniacalbooper

@rebell-ious

[whumpypepsigal]

Whumptober 2023 | No. 11

“All the lights going dark and my hope’s destroyed.”

Titans s01e07: “Robin was the answer. Robin was going to fix everything. But you ruined it!”

@whumptober @whumptober-archive

[oxideblack]

[kybercrystals94]

Unconventionally Easy

(Part 2)

Read here on Ao3!

Read Part 1 here!

By KyberCrystals94

Whumptober 2023|Day 11|Prompt 11: “All the lights going dark and my hope’s destroyed.” | Captivity

Bad Things Happen Bingo: Bleeding Out

Rating: T

Words: 1080

Summary: Tech is worse off than he first let on to Echo.

The first thing Tech is aware of is pain. Although difficult to pinpoint, after some experimental movement, he decides that it originates from three significant places: his right thigh, the right side of his abdomen, and his right arm in its entirety. Cleverly, he deduces that he must have landed on his right side.

Next, Tech becomes aware that his helmet is missing, and that he also has a head wound, though it is not nearly as sensitive as the three other injuries. Mild concussion? Likely. However, blood loss is his greatest enemy at the moment. However, if their brothers find them in a timely manner, he should be safe from immediate demise.

He is about to work on locating Echo when the scream practically gives him cardiac arrest...not something clones are prone to, at least at this age in their development. However, so startling in the silent darkness comes the blood curdling cry, that it takes every ounce of resolve to prevent a fear induced verbal reaction.

“No! Let me out!”

Tech has never heard Echo sound so panicked, so utterly terrified. Even during night terrors. Tech calls out to him in a frustratingly unsteady voice, “Echo!”

A beat, a choking breath from just a few meters away. “Tech...” Another gasp, a sob. “Help. Don’t leave me here. Please.”

Tech tries to steady his voice. He needs to keep Echo calm. Who knows what injuries he might have, what he might aggravate if he struggles. “I am not going anywhere, vod. We are going to be okay, Echo, but we must remain calm.”

It takes a few minutes of careful conversation before Tech is confident that he has talked Echo off the ledge of a hypothetical cliff of hysteria.

“What are your injuries?” Echo asks.

Tech responds vaguely but honestly. “Several lacerations on the right side of my person, possible concussion.”

“Are you bleeding badly?”

“It is difficult to tell,” Tech lies.

He knows that Echo is far too intelligent to believe him; however, his older brother does not push the point. After all, what good would it possibly do? Not trapped as they are. All they can do is wait, and hope that they are found before it is too late.

The heat that scorches the planet is deadly, and Hunter is fully aware of this. Which is why he calls for a break again, insisting that Crosshair and Wrecker drink electrolyte mixture added to their canteens.

“We don’t have time for this,” Crosshair says, snatching the packet out of Hunter’s outstretched hand. “They could be dying down there while we just sit here.”

“We aren’t just sitting here, Cross,” Hunter argues. “We won't do them any good if we collapse from heatstroke.”

Wrecker has already downed one canteen and is reaching for another. “Do you think they’re okay?”

Hunter doesn’t answer right away. Honestly, he isn’t even sure at this point if they’re rescuing brothers or recovering bodies. It’s been almost two hours since the blast, and they are still sorting rubble in hopes they won’t cause further collapse. The trackers on Echo and Tech’s comms are pinging a signal, so they know they are digging in the right place. What they don’t know is how they are injured, what will cause further injury, or if they are already dead.

“We’ll find them,” Hunter answers with empty certainty, “and they will be.”

Echo knows something is wrong when he can smell the metallic tang of blood through the dust and ashes of destruction holding him down. He tries to keep his voice as level as possible when he asks, “Tech, how badly are you injured. Really.”

“I have lost a substantial,” Tech pauses breathlessly, “amount of blood…I’m afraid.”

Echo curses under his breath. There is literally nothing he can do except lay here while his brother bleeds to death.

“Echo…” Tech says, “I don’t feel well.”

“I know, vod.” Echo swallows. “The others will be here soon. I know they will.”

“Not in time, I think.” Tech’s voice breaks at the end.

“We’re not going to talk like that,” Echo says firmly. “You said you’d stay with me, remember? I’m going to hold you to it.”

There is a long silence that stretches between Echo’s words and the ones Tech utters in transparent anguish. “I’m sorry, Echo.”

Between dehydration and trying to keep Tech conscious through endless, meaningless words, Echo’s voice scrapes like sand in his throat. He isn’t sure when his brother stops responding except that he doesn’t stop trying, even when it feels like he has to scream to manage an aching whisper.

Something shifts above him, and that’s when he hears familiar voices filtering through the barrier between himself and freedom. “Hunter!” he calls out, but his voice rasps pathetically.

But Hunter hears him. Thank the force for enhancements.

“Echo! Keep talking, we’ll get you out.”

“No, get to Tech first,” Echo says, “He’s to my left several meters. Severe blood loss. He lost consciousness a while ago…”

“Okay,” Hunter says, “we’ll get him. Are you injured?”

“Nah,” Echo tries to say lightly, “just in a tight spot.” The joke falls flat.

“We’ll find him,” Hunter says, voice so much stronger and sure than Echo’s.

Echo takes a breath.

He’s not alone anymore.

“Thought I’d let you off the hook just because you were bleeding out?”

Tech winces awake to the bright, white light of a medical bay. He blinks as comprehension sifts through foggy awareness. “I am alive. That is most fortunate,” he says, voice hoarse from disuse.

Echo scoffs, and Tech turns his head to see the reg sitting next to him. “Yeah. How fortunate.”

“I suppose this is the part where you would like for me to admit that you were right,” Tech returns with a faint smile. “They did get to us in time.”

Echo grins at him, but it doesn’t quite reach his eyes. “I was barely right…and besides, you were the one who said they’d get to us soon first, so I suppose we can both take credit for being right.”

“And we completed the mission, I assume? Supposing the data stick was not damaged in the fall.”

“Shockingly, it was one of the only things not damaged in the blast. You should design your armor like you do your pockets.”

“Another successful mission,” Tech says contentedly. He settles back, closing his eyes. “And I’ll keep that armor design in mind for future alterations.”

END

Tag List: @isthereanechoinhere96 @followthepurrgil @amorfista @patapouille

✨Let me know if you’d like to be on my Tag List!✨

[musewrangler]

“They’re looking for you?” a Rodian had asked him one night as they all lay bonelessly in their wooden bunks.

“If they know I’m alive,” Matt had said. “Yes.”

He believed this with his whole heart.

But the thing was—-

The thing was…

He’d fallen over that cliff.

Maddy’s scream of anguish still burned in his ears as well as the Admiral’s desperate cry of his name.

As far as they knew, he was dead.

[one-piece-aus]

Hi There!! Can I request Whumptober No.11 for Yandere Kaku? -Bubble Anon

Of course! Kaku is one of my favourites to write for, I do hope you enjoy the story ^-^

Whumptober Day 11

Yandere Kaku x Reader

"No, you disappeared years ago." You could hardly believe the reality before you as your hand pointed at the man who stole your heart and vanished without any trace. "What are you doing here?"

"That's a silly question, [Y/n]," Kaku chuckled as he casually approached you, wearing the charming smile that made you fall for him. "I came to see you, [Y/n]."

"I moved on," you said, taking a step back. "I'm seeing someone else."

"Is that so?" His smile remained plastered to his face but ceased moving closer to you. "And you started seeing him because I disappeared? Is that it?"

"Y-yeah..."

"I guess he'll have to start seeing someone else then," Kaku stated like it was the simplest conclusion in the world.

"What- no- I'm-" You were stumbling over your words when Kaku lowered his face to meet yours.

"Because I'm going to be taking you to live with me." His smile grew to the corner of his eyes, and while you used to always gaze lovingly into his eyes, this is the first time you noticed how dark they truly are. No shine, no light, only a soulless void staring back at you. "Isn't that wonderful, [Y/n]? You'll be able to see me every day again! Aren't you happy, [Y/n]?"

"No..." You shook your head, fear and horror slithering up your skin. "You- you can't do that."

"Oh but I can," Kaku laughed, picking you up and swinging you in the air just like he did whenever you visited him on his lunch breaks at Galley-La, even mirroring the same joyful smile he wore. "I got permission from the Celestial Dragons that you could be housed with me in our new residence."

"Did...did you say... did you say the Celestial Dragons..." Your shock made the news difficult to process, you didn't even realize Kaku set you on the ground.

"Yes, my bosses approved of you living with me in the holy land while I work for them, they even said we could be married the moment we arrive," Kaku told you, petting your hair and hugging your body to his. "We can't disappoint the Celestials, now can we?"

You were frozen in his grasp, a bunny being caressed by a fox. Once the Celestials approve of something, not doing it is disrespectful and could even be seen as an act of treason, but would they really be so generous to Kaku? They usually don't care what the common folk do, they only think of themselves, but Kaku is working for them... and if they really did give permission...

You were no different than an animal trapped at the mercy of her hunter.

Tag: @bookandyarndragon @roseoftrafalgar

[swordheld]

hi! your blog is one of my favourites and i absolutely adore reading your thoughts. my grandfather recently passed away and it feels like i lost myself with him. how do i continue living after this? there is this constant weight on my chest and it feels like an emptiness has made a home inside of me. how do i go on when it feels like the world crashed on my shoulders?

hello, love! this is so very sweet and kind of you, and i hope you're treating yourself gently and kindly right now - there aren't words for a loss like this. that heaviness is difficult, and hard, and painful. it's okay if things don't feel okay, right now, or even soon - i think that's something that a lot of the people i know that have gone through similar grief feel: like they should be able to get back to a relative 'normal' in a [insert far too short period of time].

but it's okay if it hurts. that's where i'd like to start. you're allowed to feel that emptiness, that world-crashed feeling that goes beyond words, beyond time. don't feel like you have to rush this to feel some sort of better. things get easier with time, i promise you this, but sometimes painful feelings are important to feel, too. cry, scream, feel your emotions. they're a part of you. grieve.

it's perhaps a little silly, but when i think about death i always think about a couple of space songs: mainly drops of jupiter by train and saturn by sleeping at last. there are perhaps others that speak to the emotions better, but these two have always hit something a little deeper for me, and are popular for a wide-reaching reason.

and while personally i don't know much about grief like this, i do know a lot about love; and i think they're a lot of the same thing.

the people we love are a part of us, and this is why it takes from us so deeply when we lose them, because it does feel like we've lost a part of ourselves in the wake of it. but it's because they were so central to our experiences of living - our lives, that the separation introduces a hollowness - a place where they used to be. a home that now goes unlived in.

an emptiness, like you said.

but just because they're not here physically, doesn't mean he's not still there, in your heart, in your life, your memory. you can hold him close in smaller ways, as well: steal a sweater, or cologne/scent for something a little more physical and long lasting for remembering. hold onto the memories you cherish, the things that made you laugh, the ease of slow mornings and gentle nights. write them all down, slide a few photographs in there, go through it and add more when you miss him. keep them all close, keep them in your heart.

you're not alone, in this. he's still there, with you, it's just - in the little things.

he's with you in the way you see and go about your daily life, in doing what he liked to do, in the ways he interacted with the world that you shared with him. the memories you recall fondly when the night is late or the moment is right and something calls it into you like a melody, an old bell, laughter you'd recognize anywhere.

but i think, perhaps most importantly above all others - talk about him. with your family, your friends, his friends, strangers; stories are how we keep the people we love alive. the connections they've made, the legacies and experiences they've left behind, and so, so many stories.

how lucky, we are - to love so much it takes a piece of us when they go. grief is the other side of the coin, but it does not mean our love goes away. it lives in you. it lives in everyone who knew him, in the smallest pieces of our lives.

the people we love never really leave us, like this: they're in how we cook and the way we fold our newspapers, our laundry, in the radio stations we tune in to and the way we decorate our walls, our photo albums. they're in the way we store our mail, organize our closets, the scribbled notes in the indexes of our books. the meals we love and the drinks we mix, the way we spend time with one another. they've been passed down for generations, for longer than history - and we are all the luckier for it.

think about what you shared with him, and do it intentionally. bring him into your life, like this, again. whether it's crosswords or poetry or sports or anything else. if one doesn't help, try another. something might click.

i hope things feel a little easier for you, as they tend to do only with time. i hope you find joy in your grief, even if it is small and hard to grasp at first. know that your hurt stems from so much love that there isn't a place to put it properly, and that it is something so meaningful and hurting poets and storytellers have been struggling to put it into words and sounds that feel like the fit right for eons, and that it is also just simply yours. sometimes things don't have to make sense. sometimes they just are - unable to be put into words or neat little sentiments, as unfair and tragic as they come.

but i promise it will not feel like this forever. your love is real. and perhaps, on where to begin on from here - i think it's less on finding where to begin and just beginning. and you've already started. you've taken the most important and crucial step: the first one. wherever you go, after that, from here? you'll figure it out. you always have, and you always do. it'll come, as things always do. love leads us, as does light - and you're never alone in your hurt. in your grief, your missing something dear to you. i think if you talk about it with others, you'll find they have ways of helping you cope as well - and they have so much love of their own to spare, too.

as an aside, here is the song (northern star by dom fera) i was listening to when i wrote this, for no other reason more than it makes me think of connections, and love, and how we hold onto the people we love and how they change us, wonderfully and intrinsically. it's a little more joyous than the others i've mentioned, and plays like a story, and it made me think of what is at the core of this, love and stories and i am here with you, and maybe it'll bring you some joy, if you'd like it. wishing you all my love and ease 💛

[whumpsday]

K&J: Kane's Whumptober Bites #11

Chronological masterlist / Writing order masterlist

content: death wish / suicidal ideation, vampire whumpee, captivity, bear trap, broken bones, burns

@whumptober Day 11: “All the lights going dark and my hope’s destroyed.” / Animal trap / Captivity / “No one will find you.”

-

The muscle in Kane’s leg spasmed as if crying out, crushed between shattered bone and hard metal. He whined in pain and tried to curl in on on himself, but any movement just made it worse.

With a sharp gasp, he abandoned the effort, lying limp on the floor of his cell, the bear trap snapped snugly around his leg. The silver, melted and slathered haphazardly over the trap’s jaws, pressed into his skin with enormous force as it desperately tried to close together, frustrated with Kane’s leg in the way.

It was always so much worse when it pressed in, and now it did it from both sides. A touch against silver was bad enough, but the way it pinched his skin between the jaws to sear into it, a white-hot flame that would never die, was unbearable. The pressure was greater than when hunters would push or pull him into the cell’s bars, and unlike a human, the trap was uninclined to ever let go.

But the hunters had left him like this, and he had no hope of removing himself from the trap until they returned. Kane whined again, louder this time, and pressed his face into the cool concrete floor, as if it could somehow cancel out the hellish burning.

“Help,” he gasped. A habit he’d been making less and less use of. He’d well lost track of how long it had been by this point, but it was obvious no one was coming to save him– and even more obvious that he was helpless to save himself.

There was only one way out, and that was death. And even that had been cruelly dangled out of his reach.

As long as his captivity felt, Kane knew that in reality, it was laughably short. Surely only a few years. He was young enough for a vampire, only barely past one-hundred. While a human his age would be on death’s door if they hadn’t already met it, and a human equivalent to him in physicality– thirty or so– would only live for sixty-odd more, he had more than a thousand years stretching beyond him, if he couldn’t earn a staking before then.

Even that hope was diminished, knowing the hunters had too much fun making him their plaything to let him meet death so easily. Perhaps in a century, when all his current tormenters would be dead and cycled out for new ones, the next generation of humans would have a change of heart.

It was little comfort to him now, the peace of death a distant dream. A shard of bone shifted in his leg and the trap cinched tighter, wringing a wail from his hoarse throat.

[lithium223]

[adrift-in-thyme]

Whumptober Day 11: "All the light's going dark and my hope's destroyed" + Animal Trap

Read on Ao3

- Legend & Hyrule

- Summary: When the sudden appearance of a portal sends Legend and Hyrule hurtling to an unknown destination, Legend attempts to save them both. But it all goes terribly wrong

CW for a character nearly drowning (it's not too descriptive, but just be careful), dehumanization, and drugging

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He’s falling.

Legend only half-registers it. His stomach is in a knot, his body weightless, yet strangely heavy. His heart is in his throat. Wind rushes past his ears. But it’s not the plummet he fears. It’s the darkness he is headed towards.

He’s falling, Rulie is falling, and he hasn’t a clue where they'll land.

Dark magic warps around him, funneling him down, down, down. He reaches toward it with his own magic, trying to guide it, to nudge it in a safe direction.

Water. They need to land in water. Otherwise this will end very badly.

He solidifies an image in his head. A lake — big and beautiful and clear, waterfalls rushing down into it. There. That’s where he wants them to land. 

A hand grapples in the darkness. Fingers wrap around his own, familiar magic pouring through them to enhance his own. A slight smile lifts Legend’s lips.

Hyrule.

The image grows more clear and distinct. The smell of fresh water and dewy grass fills his nostrils. Legend steels himself and takes a deep breath. Any moment now…

Heart pounding in his throat, he tightens his hold on Hyrule’s hand. 

“Don’t let go,” he orders through the waves of their entwined magic. And Hyrule’s grip strengthens in reply.

Another moment slides by, a moment filled with utter darkness and the nauseating push and pull of gravity. Legend holds his breath, awaiting impact. 

It comes in a rush of magic and liquid, cold and heat, light and darkness. Legend catches a glimpse of blue sky and white clouds. Then his body breaks the surface with such force it knocks the air from his lungs.

Water floods the space it leaves and he chokes on it. Black dots dance before his eyes. Desperately, he fights to hang on — to consciousness, to the hand that now lies limp in his.

Come on. He grits his teeth, kicking his feet to try and surface. Change already!

As if in response, a sharp pain streaks through him. His two legs become a single, powerful tail; his fingernails grow into talons; iridescent scales climb up and down his body. And in the next moment he can breathe.

Legend wastes no time. Ensuring Hyrule’s hand is firmly in his own, he begins to climb toward the surface. The sun shines through it, beckoning him forth. 

Hope blossoms within him as he grows closer. He’s almost there. 

The net comes out of nowhere. He sees it briefly out of the corner of his eye – a dark, looming thing. But his mind doesn’t have time to process, nor his body to evade. And in the next moment, it surrounds him. 

Coarse ropes tangle in his fins, wrap around his tail. Panic coursing through him, Legend thrashes. With his free hand he claws at the net, attempting to shred it. He has to break free, he has to get Hyrule to the surface. 

But his efforts are fruitless. The ropes are too strong, too thick.

“I caught something!” A voice comes from up above. Any other time it would be muffled by the water that surrounds him. But now, in this form, Legend can hear it clearly, as if the man is standing right beside him. “It’s big! And it’s a fighter.”

“Hurry! It could be what we have been looking for!”

The net begins to move, dragging the heroes upward. And after a moment more of struggling, Legend lets it. It goes against every instinct he has, to allow their captors to haul them up onto the boat. But fighting back takes time, time Hyrule doesn’t have.

He pulls the traveler to his chest, wrapping his arms protectively around him. And in the next seconds they break through the surface and are pulled onto the floor of a small boat. 

Legend can make out blurred faces, leering and unfamiliar; a blue sky painted behind a layer of trees; water drifting as far as he can see. But he doesn’t allow himself to survey his surroundings beyond that. Almost immediately, his attention is back on the hero who lies limp in his arms.

“Rulie,” he gasps, through burning lungs. This form never fares well on the surface. But it will only be a short while before he reverts to his Hylian body. He can hold on until then.

Dragging in another wheezing attempt at a breath, he presses a hand to the traveler’s face. His skin is cool and pale, eyes still closed, chest still. Dread settles unpleasantly in Legend’s gut.

Maybe landing them in the water was not such a wonderful idea, after all. Maybe he should have let whatever was going to happen, happen. Maybe he should have focused his attention on crafting a shield around them instead.

He shakes his head, shoving the thoughts away. Gritting his teeth, he closes his eyes.

He doesn’t know how to weave the powerful healing spells that Hyrule does, but he is familiar with a few simpler ones. Spells that can take care of cuts and bruises, gashes that don’t travel too deep, even wounds that render you unconscious. And perhaps, they will be enough to drag the water from Hyrule’s lungs.

“Well, well, what have we here?” A voice croons from above him. 

Distantly, he registers the net lifting off and away, dragging at his tail as it does so. He does his best to ignore it. 

“A sea creature?”

“It’s called a mermaid.”

“Well, I’ve seen one of those before.”

“Isn’t this what you were looking for?”

“Indeed.”

Someone is leaning over him now. Legend can feel their hot breaths on his neck. 

“Look at him. What a magical being.”

A hand brushes over the length of his tail and Legend inhales sharply. The breath soon turns into a hacking cough as his body reminds him how little air he is gaining at the moment. 

Ignore it, he tells himself, even as every part of him screams to leap back into the water, where he can breathe, where the clammy hands of strangers won’t touch him. Focus on Rulie. 

“I wish to study him. Take him…and throw his friend back into the water.”

The words have barely registered in Legend’s mind before rough hands wrap around his waist and pull. His fingers slip from Hyrule and the spell dies upon them. 

“No!”

He thrashes, striking out with his claws, kicking as his tail splits and becomes legs. Someone cries out and another voice joins them. But they are a mere cacophony of unintelligible noise to Legend’s ears. All he can see is Hyrule being dragged toward the edge, all he can hear is the deafening silence left by the absence of his brother’s breaths.

This is all your fault. 

A fist connects with his jaw and he reels back, tasting the sharpness of iron. But seconds later he is struggling again, desperation allowing him to push through the pain, the fear, the way the world feels like it's closing in on him all over again, like the day his uncle died, the day the entire kingdom had turned its back on him without reason…

An arm comes into reach and he bites down, hard. That earns him a slap across the face.

“Stop fighting, damn it!”

He kicks outward, feet connecting with someone’s body. They hurl him down onto the unforgiving wood of the boat, so hard that he sees stars. For a moment it is all he can do to breathe.

“Little brat!”

“Is he even worth the trouble? Look at him! He changed back!”

“Calm yourselves. You are damaging the specimen.”

Legend drags his head upward just as a man squats down in front of him. With his graying hair and wizened face carved with smile lines, one could think him kind, even grandfatherly. But when he grips Legend’s chin and holds his gaze, there is no sympathy in those eyes. There is only cold, terrible, hunger.

Legend shoves himself up on his hands and knees, wrenching himself out of the man’s grip. He steels himself, hand already going toward the hilt of his sword. He will fight to the death if need be. They will not touch Hyrule.

But the man’s voice halts his movements.

“Remain still or your friend will go over the side.”

Legend glares at him. He can see no lie in that face. His hand falls back down to lie limply at his side.

“What do you want?” he grits out.

The man regards him calmly. “I have been interested in strange creatures for many years now. I have studied them quite extensively. One might even call me an expert. However, I have yet to examine a mer. So, you, my boy, are quite a fortunate find.”

He rises, still looking at Legend as though he wants to pin him to a board and stare at him for a while. Legend fights not to squirm beneath his gaze.

“You are fascinating. Not quite a mer and yet…not quite Hylian either. Oh, the discoveries that could be made from you.”

The man moves closer. Before he can stop himself, Legend backs up a step, bumping against the two men he hadn’t realized were standing behind him. He can’t breathe now. It’s as though he is dragging in surface air through his gills again, fighting to remain conscious. 

Focus. You don’t have time to panic.

“I would take you by force,” the man continues, calmly, as though carrying a conversation with a neighbor, “as my men have so clumsily attempted to do. But that would damage you beyond repair. And in order for my experiments to work, you must be in optimal condition. I must control for most variables. I’m sure you understand.”

“Yeah, I understand alright. You creep.”

Legend’s eyes flit around, taking in his surroundings, looking for a viable way out. His fingers flex and clench, itching for a weapon. But Hyrule is so close to the edge now. Too close. One wrong move and he will fall back into a watery grave. 

And the water…the water is the only chance of escape he has. But the cost would be great, too great for him to entertain.

He inhales a trembling breath and makes his decision.

“If you want me so badly, I’ll come with you. On one condition.” He looks back at Hyrule, ignoring the way his heart clenches at the sight of him.

You idiot. Letting yourself become attached again. Don’t you ever learn?

“Let me save him. Then, take him back to shore and leave him there.”

The man doesn’t answer at first. He looks between the two heroes, fist at his chin. Then, he nods.

“Very well.” He turns to his men. “Take us back to shore as quickly as possible. And bind and blindfold the boy.”

Legend watches, anger boiling within him, as they tie thick ropes around Hyrule’s wrists and a cloth around his head. No sooner have they stepped back than he rushes forward, skidding on his knees before him. The spell is already at his fingertips and in his mind, woven threads of his magic. And he reaches out, pressing a hand to Rulie’s arm as it pours forth.

“Watch him,” he hears someone say from far away. “He might try to pull something.”

“He won’t,” the man with hungry eyes answers. “He cares too much for his friend.”

Legend shakes his head, brushing off the oppressive truth of the statement.

“Come on, Rule,” he murmurs, “come on. Wake up.”

A moment passes and another and another, slipping by in slow succession. All the while the boat speeds toward the shore. If he looked up, Legend doesn’t doubt that he would see the bank fast approaching. But he doesn’t dare. He hardly allows himself to breathe.

Tears stream down his face and blur his vision. He doesn’t brush them away.

“Come on, traveler. You’re tougher than this. Don’t you dare die on me!”

Another series of seconds pass in which Hyrule doesn’t move. And then, abruptly, he draws in a gasping breath. He pitches sideways coughing up mouthfuls of water. Relief streaks dizzyingly through Legend as he reaches out, gripping his shoulder to support him.

“You’re okay, Rulie,” he says, both to himself and the hero trembling in his grasp. “You’re okay.”

Thank the goddesses.

The coughs subside and turn to haggard breaths. Hyrule raises his head, dazedly attempting to look around. 

“Ledge?” He croaks. He tries to move his hands up to his face, but the ropes prevent the motion. “Legend…what happened? Why can’t I…where are we?”

Legend is about to answer when the boat comes to a stop, bumping against a grassy shoreline. His heart climbs into his throat. 

“It’s okay,” he manages. “You’ll be fine. Don’t worry.”

Hyrule turns toward the sound of his voice and Legend is glad that he cannot see the look in his eyes.

“But what about you?”

Strong hands grasp his arms and wrench him away from the traveler. He stumbles to his feet.

Men close in around Hyrule too, hauling him up and starting toward the shore. He struggles, though weakly, face still much too pale.

“Legend!”

Legend manages a shaky smile, more for his own sake than his brother’s.

“I’ll be fine too. Don’t waste your time worrying about me. Get free and get out of here, you hear! Don’t you dare try and come back for me!”

Hyrule gives another shout as he hits the damp ground, immediately trying to stumble up on bound feet. But Legend can hardly hear him now past the thundering of his heart and the distant sounds of water lapping at the boat as it drifts back into the depths.

Then, something cool and metallic pierces his neck and he knows no more.

[whumpookies]

Day 12, All the lights going dark and my hopes destroyed.

Prompt: red (anger/tired/loosing control lashing out)

Seref sözü episode 3

[evillittlebirdie]

Salvation (Kar'niss/Tav)

Chapter One Chapter Two Chapter Three Chapter Four Chapter Five Chapter Six Chapter Seven Chapter Eight Chapter Nine

No. 11: “All the lights going dark and my hope’s destroyed.”

Animal trap | Captivity | “No one will find you.”

He was unsuccessful. He was a monster. He shamed his family. 

"Ilhar, Ilhar, please!" Kar'niss had lost all hope at this point. His failure sealed his fate. He failed the test of Lolth. And she punished him. He was wretched now. The childish part of him that thought his mother was even more powerful than Lolth begged for her. "Don't leave me!" Even if he wasn't in agony, his new body was far too large and cumbersome to move. He couldn't run to her. He struggled to coordinate his many legs, but he kept tripping. 

But Ilhar did leave him. She spun on her heels, her attendants one pace behind her. "Let us hope the Neideirra has a decent bard. Otherwise, this day was indeed a waste," She relayed to her patron, Kar'niss' father. 

"I agree, Mistress," Ilharn concurred, not giving his son another thought.

"Matron, would you care to keep the drider as a slave, or would you like us to dispose of him on the outskirts?" A cleric questioned.

"A drider slave? How gauche. No. Dispose of it," Ilhar responded. "Unless...K'yorl..." She turned her attention to her husband, "Do you want it?"

Kar'niss allowed his hope to rise exponentially. "Yes, yes! Please, Ilharen. I can serve the house well, I promise. Whatever you deem-" 

"Oh, that sound, that screeching," Ilharen visibly winced, "I do not want to be anywhere close to it. If you will it, Mistress, I would not take this creature." 

Kar'niss stared at his parents, watching them leave without another word. He began to shake. His legs scrambled up, and he managed to find his balance. "Ilhar! Ilharen! Please! I'll be good! I promise! Don't!" 

Kar'niss felt his body fall with a single step. With each fall, he felt his newly formed body sprain under the weight of his swollen abdomen. All pride abandoned, he sobbed into his hands. He hissed out as his claw accidentally scratched one of his dark eyes. After retracting his hands, Kar'niss attempted to stand up again. But unexpectedly, he felt something tight around his throat. One of the clerics had subdued him with a catchpole around his neck. She pulled, and Kar'niss shuffled to his feet to avoid strangulation. 

"Just kill me," Kar'niss pleaded with one of the cold-faced clerics. "I have failed Lolth. I have failed Ilhar. I have nothing to live for." He was a monster, a freak of nature, an abomination. 

"Silence, drider. You disrespect your house and Lolth by denying your punishment. May you live a long, miserable life," The cleric denounced before leading Kar'niss to a cage. "In," She commanded harshly before loosening the catchpole. Kar'niss whimpered at the sight of the pen. Cages were for slaves or animals. And yet he was worse. He used his hands to poise himself as he walked into the cage. 

Kar'niss woke from his trance, gasping for breath. His eyes blinked awake. "Her Majesty, preserve me," He moaned, his hands traveling to his hair. He began to pull at the greasy locks, whimpering. 

"Her Majesty, thank you for saving me. Days, weeks, months, years, years, years, years, years," Kar'niss squealed out, his last utterance of 'years' sounding almost like a scream. The transformation wounded him, and the isolation broke him. "Hunting, hissing, hiding, howling, hacking, hallucinating, hastening, hoarding," He chanted, climbing down from his alcove. "Haunting until I found you." He released his hold on his hair before he saw something out of place at the mouth of his cave. 

Kar'niss skittered to investigate and was confused to see a basket at the entrance of the cave. "What is this, your Majesty?" He peeked into the basket and frowned. Inside the container was a neatly folded blanket, an unlit lantern, books, and a carafe of water. Even his weapons, polished and clean, were placed in the basket. "Provisions from Her Majesty's Chosen," Kar'niss observed with a tilt of his head. "What a benevolent prophet, Your Majesty. Thank you..." 

Tav, such a simple, humble name for a Chosen. She had already graced him with mercy and care. He felt a warmth in his stomach, a flush on his cheeks. His pedipalps flexed in response. Tav had done so much and yet asked nothing of him. Kar'niss needed to show his gratitude. 

"Long ago, before you, far, far, far, far befre you, Your Majesty, when I worshipped the spider, I knew how to show appreciation. But I can't in this form. But maybe...maybe this wretch could find a way..." Kar'niss thought quickly, before he giggled, entertained by his notion. "No...No...Not that way either..." He ran his tongue over his upper lip. 

He bent over to pick up the basket and retreated into his lair. 

***

"How much blood do you think a drider needs?" 

"Tav, who taught you manners? That's not how you start a conversation. A 'hello, how are you' is how you start a conversation."

"Hello, how are you?"

"I'm well, and you?"

"Great. How much blood do you think a drider needs?"

[keebwee]

Whumptober 2023 No. 11: "All the lights are going dark and my hope's destroyed."

Animal Trap | Captivity | "No one will find you."

warnings/basic summary of the art !!!

mikey gets caught in a bear trap! its all in pencil, so theres no color, but there is blood.

[serickswrites]

Going Dark

Warnings: blood, broken bones, restraint, gun, gunfire, unclear character status, captivity

Whumpee's chest was heaving as they ran. Their legs ached and their lungs burned, but they had to keep running. They had to get away. Whumper had been careless and left the door unlocked, so today was the day.

Whumpee screamed as the worst pain they had ever felt overwhelmed them. They fell clutching at their leg that was now trapped in a bear trap. Blood flowed from around the teeth of the trap that was now thoroughly embedded in their leg. They were sure their ankle had broken. Between the pain of the wound and the pain in their bones, Whumpee was nauseous.

This couldn't be happening. This was their one chance to escape. They howled their agony into the night, not caring who heard them. They were as good as dead anyway.

"You have my attention, Whumpee." Whumper's cold voice came from the other side of the clearing.

"Please, please," Whumpee begged through their tears.

"Please, what?" Whumper's voice was only loud enough to just hear.

"Please," Whumpee sobbed, "just let me go. I won't tell anyone."

Whumper frowned. "But I'm not done with you yet."

Whumper surveyed Whumpee coldly. There was no emotion or warmth in their gaze. Their eyes held no emotion as they raised their hunting rifle. "No one will find you." And they fired.