#All The Dairy of A CEO

[xxxsimplyhookedxxx]

Cole Sprouse: My Narcissistic Mum Sacrificed My Childhood For Fame! | E229

[thewidowsledger]

Good Luck, Babe

Chapter 2: Debt

© thewidowsledger 2024 - DO NOT REPUBLISH AND PLAGIARISE

Summary: The once secret, a forbidden love hidden from the world. Those stolen moments together had been thrilling, but ultimately, drove the person you trully love away from you. But when she left, she didn't just leave you; she also left you a part of herself that would constantly remind you of her for the rest of your life. This fragment of her essence became an indelible mark on your soul, shaping the course of your life in ways you never could have imagined.

You know what they say, when someone leaves, someone else will come.

Pairings: Natasha Romanoff x Female Reader

Word count: 2.8k

Tags | Warnings: this is going to be a ride, ANGST, little fluff, custody battle, Natasha being a bitch (?) forced marriage

Author's Note: I know I promised a Wanda fic but I need to post this first…

Navigation | Masterlist | Series Masterlist

⧗

3 years later…

Late one evening, Natasha found herself wandering the aisles of a quiet, upscale grocery store. Gone were the power suits and sky-high heels; tonight, she was clad in a simple hoodie and jeans, her hair hidden beneath a baseball cap.

She had booked a small, cozy airbnb for a week, craving solitude and anonymity during her brief vacation. As a wealthy businesswoman, she could afford any luxury, but tonight, she sought the comfort of anonymity. The store's peaceful atmosphere and lack of familiar faces provided the perfect refuge from her hectic life.

Unfortunately for Natasha, her younger sister, Yelena, possessed an uncanny talent for tracking her down. Two days into her secret vacation, Yelena appeared just outside the door of her small airbnb.

Natasha's journey to becoming a successful businesswoman began unexpectedly. As the lead guitarist of the college band, her passion for music was unwavering. However, fate intervened when her father, the CEO of a multinational corporation, suddenly passed away, leaving her in charge of the family business.

And of course, her dreams about music were all forgotten as she threw herself into learning the intricacies of the business world—her only way to cope after you.

“Hey, Nat! I’ll go get some toiletries.”

“Okay, I’ll get my yogurt.”

Natasha strode towards the dairy section, her eyes scanning the shelves for her favorite indulgence. She loved yogurt, but there was only one brand that truly satisfied her discerning palate. To her dismay, the shelf was bare, but there was still one remaining tub of the creamy, tangy delight.

Just as Natasha's fingers closed around the last tub of her favorite yogurt, a sudden, lightning-fast movement from behind startled her. Before she could react, a small, eager hand darted out and snatched the yogurt away, leaving her empty-handed.

When Natasha knelt down to the culprit's eye level, the small girl took a step back, suddenly looking uncertain. The yogurt was still clutched tightly in her small hands. The little girl tilted her head to the side, her innocent, wide-eyed gaze fixed on Natasha. Her long lashes cast shadows on her rosy cheeks as she blinked curiously, taking in the woman kneeling before her.

Without warning, the little girl eagerly toddled forward and threw her arms around Natasha's neck, burying her face in the crook of her arm. Caught off guard, Natasha hesitantly returned the hug.

“Mama,” the small girl whined.

“Oh sh—gosh, I'm so sorry about her! She's just a little rascal when she's excited!” A teen boy hastily approached, tugging gently on the girl’s arm. “Come on, Liah, leave the nice lady alone.”

The young girl hesitantly allowed herself to be pulled away from who she thought was her mama by the boy. She looked up at her with wide, innocent eyes, her lower lip trembling slightly.

“Sorry, miss,” the teen mumbled, keeping a firm but gentle grip on the little girl’s hand.

The teen paused, his brow furrowing as he stared at Natasha. “Wow, this is a bit awkward. You look exactly like...Liah.” He trailed off, shifting uncomfortably from one foot to the other.

“Liah?” Natasha echoed, taken aback. She glanced at the little girl, who was now timidly clutching the boy’s hand. “Is that her name?” The boy nodded, running a hand through his disheveled hair.

“Yeah, Aliah, can you introduce and apologize to the lady right here?” The teen encouraged gently. The girl eagerly complied, turning to Natasha with innocent eager eyes.

“Awiah, mama, I Awiah mama…” she introduced herself, holding out the tub of yogurt, Natasha bit her inner lip, her heart aching as she looked at the little girl who is calling her mama.

“Hi I—”

“Liah, she’s not mama okay? Mommy is waiting for us outside.” The teen interjected quickly, giving Natasha an apologetic look and not letting her introduce herself. “I am really sorry miss, we’re gonna go now.”

Just as the two left, Yelena appeared at her side. She glanced down at her sister’s lost reaction. Suddenly, a curious expression crossed her features.

“That kid looks a lot like you.” She casually said as she hugged the rolls of toilet papers.

“You saw?” Natasha asked, her voice barely above a whisper. “The whole thing, I mean.” Yelena nodded, her brow furrowing with concern. “Yeah, Nat. Are you alright?”

“Yeah, let's checkout now,” Natasha dismissed and started walking to the cashier.

“Hey! Did you get your yogurt?” Yelena asked as she walked behind her sister.

“The kid got it, but it’s fine,” the redhead said quietly, trying to brush off the situation and avoid discussing it further.

⧗

“Hey, did you two get my tub?” you called out. To your surprise, both Billy and your daughter took off running towards you.

“Yes!” the boy shouted back, and your daughter lifted the tub of yogurt triumphantly as they neared your car. “We got it!”

You grinned widely, feeling relieved and appreciative. As the two reached you, you scooped Aliah into your arms, her tiny body warming against your chest. She eagerly showed you the yogurt, her eyes sparkling with joy. “You got it! Thank you so much, sweetie,” You cooed, giving her a gentle squeeze before addressing the teen. “And thank you too. I really appreciate it. Let’s go home?” You set Aliah down gently, and she clung to your leg, peeking out shyly at the boy.

You load the groceries into the backseat of the car, then secure Liah in her booster seat. While Billy sat beside her. Once everything is settled, you slide into the driver's seat and turn the ignition, starting the car and beginning your journey home.

“You guys took long,” you commented as you drove.

“Oh yeah, we stumbled into this lady who looked exactly like Liah,” Billy giggled, glancing back at the car seat where Aliah sat. Your daughter was looking through the windows as if she was deep in thought.

“Really?”

“Yeah, and Liah actually called her mama,” Billy continued, laughing heartily. “It’s so funny. The lady looked really surprised, though.” You felt a surge of curiosity, your grip tightening slightly on the steering wheel.

“Oh, that's...interesting,” you said awkwardly as you continued to drive with a feeling of unease.

Three years, three years had passed when you called the engagement off with Steve, not being able to bear the things you did behind his back throughout your relationship. Besides, he immediately picked up on your daughter’s features that she wasn’t his, he’s a celibate for fuck’s sake.

But he made sure you pay for everything you have done. He used his connections and influence to make sure you were passed over for the coveted law school you had poured your heart into getting into. He ensured your applications for every job you're going to get into were rejected. But his wrath didn't stop at your plans and dreams after you graduated. Steve came up to your mother, laying bare the truth of your infidelity and the circumstances surrounding your daughter's birth. And he made sure that your own mother would turn her back on you, disown you and cut off all contact with you—and she did.

In the last three years since everything happened, you had poured all your love and energy into raising your daughter, Liah. She’s three now, she is a vibrant ray of sunshine in your life. Her infectious laughter and innocent hugs helped soothe the ache of lost dreams and shattered relationships.

So you made sure to shower her with love, provide a secure and nurturing home. You are determined to ensure that she never feels the absence that plagues you, that your love is enough. You would go to great lengths to fill the void, never wanting her to suffer any absences in her life.

You had to start over because your reputation had already been irreparably damaged. You never blamed Steve for what he did, even though he had gone out of his way to deliberately ruin your life, you can't help but solely blame yourself for the situation. The guilt and self-reproach weigh heavily on you, blaming only yourself for the consequences of your own choices and actions.

Only if you weren’t a coward.

In a bid to start anew, you made a bold decision to move states, trading the life you knew for a fresh start. From being a once-admired student, you started as a cashier in a small grocery store, earning just enough to provide for your daughter. It’s a stark contrast to your former life, but your daughter’s well-being is your top priority, making your humble job a small sacrifice for her happiness and future.

Over time, through your hard work and perseverance, you have regained your footing, making commissions as an advertising sales agent. What you do right now is far from what you graduated but it no longer matters to you, each day, you strive to climb to the top, motivated by the desire to give your daughter a life you couldn't give yourself, not only planning to make it to law school again but making a new name for yourself to erase the mistakes of your past.

Make it to those people you owe. And there is one particular person you owe the most.

“Y/N, I can walk from my house since it's on the way.” You blinked rapidly, you shook your head to clear your thoughts and pulled over to the side of the road.

“Are you sure? I can drive you door-to-door Billy, I don't want you momma worrying.”

“Don't worry, I got it from here plus princess here looks really tired.” He poked the cheek of your daughter who is still looking at the window of the car, deep in thoughts like you awhile ago.

“Well, okay then. Same time tomorrow?” You asked, your eyes never leaving your daughter's as you look at her through the rearview mirror.

Billy grinned, “Of course, Y/N. You know I love spending time with your little munchkin. Where are you off to anyway?” He zipped up his coat, preparing to exit the car.

You sighed, running a hand through your hair. “Work's been piling on more responsibilities lately. It's requiring me more time at work.” You gave him an appreciative smile. “Thanks, Billy. You're a lifesaver.”

You reached into your purse and pulled out an envelope containing the babysitting fee. “Here you go,” you said, handing it to him. “She needs to be picked up 3 hours early since their teacher said it's a shortened period for their class. So…it's not the same time for tomorrow.”

He noticed the worn edges of your wallet peeking out from your purse and the slight hesitation in your voice when you mentioned the time. “You know, Y/N, it's okay if you can't pay me this time, consider it a favor, no payment needed.” You felt a lump form in your throat, touched by the kid’s gesture.

“Billy, no, I can't ask you to do that for free,” you insisted, a hint of guilt in your voice. “I was supposed to go home an hour early today, but then work piled on more tasks, and now I'm late again…and so is my commission pay.”

The kid held up a hand, stopping your apology. “Y/N, it's fine, really, I understand. And I love spending time with Liah anyways.” Billy waved goodbye, turning to walk away. You hesitated, still wanting to argue, but he purposefully ignored you, shouting over his shoulder, “No, Y/N, you need the money. I'll be fine. See you tomorrow!”

You beeped your car, leaning out the window. “Come back here, young man!” But he just grinned, turning around. He walked backwards, facing Liah in the backseat, and dramatically made finger guns at her, pulling an exaggerated face that finally made your daughter giggle.

“Liah's pick up is 1 PM instead of 4 I know, Y/N, bye!” He laughed, giving you a wave before turning the corner and disappearing from your view.

You could only sigh, watching Billy leave. He'd been Liah's trusted babysitter. He is a teen from your neighborhood. Billy was a sweet, responsible kid with a heart of gold. Despite his own financial struggles for university, he never once let it affect his care for Liah. And you have never been grateful for the kid.

⧗

Once home, you heated up some leftovers for dinner, sitting down with Liah at the tiny kitchen table. She quietly ate her chicken nuggets, still not having spoken much since from the grocery store. You were unused to her prolonged silence. “Aliah, sweetie, thank you for the tub. Mommy is happy.”

The kid just gave you a tight-lipped smile, swinging her feet as she ate.

“Did something happen, sweetie? Mommy is worried.” Liah shook her head again, still not speaking. You sighed deeply, knowing you probably shouldn't ask but your curiosity was getting the best of you.

“Liah, is it true you saw someone who looked like Mama today?” Her eyes widened and she nodded vigorously, practically bouncing in her seat.

“No! She is mama mommy!”

“Really?” you hesitated, not wanting to asked further. You shut your eyes closed, biting your inner lip, your mind drifting back to your past...you opened up your eyes looking at your little girl who looked exactly like her, a name you don't want to mention as of now not until you had any confirmation.

“What did she look like, baby?”

Liah hopped off her chair and scurried over to the mantle, grabbing a framed picture you always kept displayed. She brought it back to you, presenting the photo you always see before you go out and comeback from work.

Since her disappearance, you never hid the truth from Liah. You told her that her mama was just working really far away and would be coming home soon—you never removed her from the picture in Liah's life. You wanted your daughter to grow up believing she had a complete family. You spoke of her often, shared stories and memories, humming the same music she used to sing to you when you sleep on her arms—always presenting her as a loving mother who would return someday.

Your heart was racing, nerves fluttering in your chest as Liah pointed at the photo. It was a photo of you together, her arms wrapped around your neck. “She is mama, I saw mama,” your little girl said, from not speaking a word a while ago, now, she is joyful, pointing at the photo of her mama.

Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes as you realized the implications.

She saw her mother. She saw Natasha.

Liah was far too innocent to lie about something like this. She believed with all her heart that she had seen her mother, and you knew she wasn't mistaken. Natasha was out there, somewhere, and she had somehow come face to face with her daughter.

The realization sent shivers down your spine and that has led you to this very moment…

“Natasha, please, you can't take Liah away from me!” you cried out, running after her as she stormed out of the courthouse. You have been summoned to the court, delivering the devastating news that Natasha was pursuing full custody of your daughter.

Natasha didn't know Yelena did a secret investigation after she saw the kid that she told her looked exactly like her, she even forgot about it days after the encounter. But when Yelena came to her and told her what she found out, that the kid was in fact yours, it led her to uncover the truth—the kid was also hers and everything can be figured out only from that fact.

You wanted to argue, to present a denial, but the truth was plainly obvious. Liah looked exactly like Natasha, her carbon copy. If the court demanded a DNA test, it would be the end of you, you might also probably serve some time in jail.

So in your desperation, you resorted to begging, pleading with Natasha for mercy.

“N-Natasha…please!”

She walked briskly away, her face expressionless, she didn't bother to look back at you. You chased after her, your steps urgent as you pleaded, “Natasha, please, let’s work something out. Wh-what about shared custo—”

“I want full custody.” Her voice was steady, leaving no room for negotiation and immediately cutting you off. “The next hearing is in a week. Don’t bother showing up if you can't match my offer.” Her heels clicked harshly against the marble floor as she continued her inexorable march away from you. Each step she took echoed with finality. Your words seemed to bounce off her back, unheard, unimportant.

But you will do anything, you will meet the ends not to be away from your life—from your daughter.

“Please, you can't just take Liah from me. There must be another way!” Your voice cracked, desperation clawing at your insides.

“Marry me.”

“I’ll marry you!” you blurted out, the words tumbling from your lips before you could stop them. The courthouse fell silent, and a few people turned to look at the two of you. A tear slid down your cheek as the magnitude of your words sank in.

Natasha looked at your tear-stained face, your pleas are already music to her ears and she took her time taking in the sight of your desperation with a glimmer of satisfaction in her eyes.

“It’s settled then,” she declared, her voice carrying a new same authority she had on you. “In a week, same courthouse, not for custody battle but for our wedding.”

[grimdarling69]

Another de aged Ellie and Dan or otherwise known as Crack

P1 P2 P3

Damian is now regretting every decision that led to where he was at this point in his half-life.

He felt so if he had been battered by a storm all night long and he was pretty sure he was having fever dreams because fucking Lex Luthor is currently dabbing at his head with a damp towel.

Come on, Damian. You're better than this. Get up and fight him. Father would be disappointed if I failed to stop whatever luthor was scheming because of a common cold. He could already see his father's face, his disappointment shrouded in the shadows created by the looming stalactites in the cave. He'd take away Robin, he lose Richard's first gift to him. He couldn't let his baba down.

He tried to shed the blankets but his body failed him and he had to resist a coughing fit. He shivered cold and clammy. His body felt heavy and his clothes were sticking to him uncomfortablely. His hair was a mess and clouded his vision.

"Rest now, ghostling. Your very sick. I need to get you into some new clothes and quickly." he murmured quietly, leaning forward and plying his bangs from his face. For a second he thought he was going to kiss his head and he started struggling again.

"Don't-" He attempted but his voice broke off into a coughing fit. He struggled to catch his breath.

"Shh.. shhh...drink." he gently lifted a glass of water with a childishly pinky bendy straw to his lips. His gentle voice and calm actions remindimg him of his baba and he stupidly started to drink it before he remembered where he was and resisted again.

Luthor didn't seem surprised but didn't attempt to speak to him again and gently pushed him back down onto the bed. His eyes were heavy and he had to repeatedly jerk his head to stay awake.

Ancients, what was wrong with him he was a trained assassin. Not to mention Robin he could survive days without even a second of sleep.

Luthor pushed the door open again and carried soft looking sleepwear in his hands. When did he leave? The sleepwear had little stars and moons and suns periodically spread about. He couldn't help but admire them.

"Please don't fight me, Dani- Damian. You have to get out of those drenched clothes. If you sleep in them, you'll just get sicker. Come on, you love the stars." He tried in vain to fight him off, but eventually Luthor was cringing at him, scratches all over his arms and face, holding the wet clothes in one hand.

"Try to get some sleep. We'll talk in the morning." He turned the lights off and closed the door.

He waited a second to make sure he was actually gone. Once he was sure, he tried to wrangle him self off the bed but kept having to blink and rub his eyes. He had finally succeeded in getting out from under the blanket before he couldn't stay awake any longer and passed out from exhaustion.

---------

Vlad because he was Vlad Masters sometimes known as Vlad Plasmius or ugh the Wisconsin Ghost not Lex Luthor he had spent far to long redeeming himself and becoming a productive member of society to be reincarnated into a cruel ceo who cares only about his image and money and destroys the earth to make it. Creating pollution, ruining lives for no reason, abusing his powers, and trying to kill his archnemesis. Okay, maybe he was being a bit hypocritical, but he was redeemed already, and now he had to start all over!

Every villian worth their salt knows that archenemesiss are for life and he was a redeemed one for goodness sake. He may of fought his godson a lot in his early days but he had been alone for so long. He was a ghost they bonded by fighting! He also apologized for not realized that he didn't know ghost culture yet. He assumed he'd gotten a mentor ghost somewhere like he had the dairy king to teach him and once he realized he made him take lessons with that yeti docter of his.

He was the only one of his kind for decades and it certainly didn't help when his best friends abandoned him after killing him. Jasmine loved to physcoanalyze him she often tried to talk to him about his abandonment issues caused by his parents' deaths worsened by his older sister walking out on him and his future almost destroyed because of Jack Fenton and a fucking soda. That his obsession with Madelyn was caused by the fact he was desperate for family and latched onto the first thing that could give him one.

He didn't approve of cursing, he had kids-god-children that didn't need to hear it but he supposed he could excuse it just this once. Or twice.

When his godson had crashed into his island he felt the presence of his other kids but it was diluted almost. He hoped that whenever Damian woke up he could give him some context.

That was another thing. Somehow, his incredibly gifted and smart godson had apparently but reincarnated as Brucie Wayne's son. He could hardly believe it, but it was also worrying he had found some heavy scaring on him. Everywhere he was covered in scars, some had to be a decade old, at least. Whoever hurt his son was going to pay.

"Mr Luthor, sir?" His assistant knocked on his door.

Ugh, Luthor wasn't terrible he had to admit it had a nice ring to it was just-Lex?... disgusting.

"Come in."

"The um...children's cold medicine is here." She spoke unsure, but handed the specially ordered medicine over. It was brought over by a very good drone from the nearest industrialized island, perks of being a billionaire. He had even more money than in his previous life.

"Aw thank you, Susan." She blinked at him while he took the package she'd been with him since before Konner and so it was understandable she wasn't used to him just now caring to remember her name. Konner... he'll have to contact him to set up a meeting between his new son and his brother soon.

"Will you alert the chefs to cook a simple breakfast for us. No onions and no meat. He'll need to eat with this one. Have it brought to his room." He barely remembered that his godson won't be eating meat anymore after he remembered from one chance meeting at a gala but he had always hated onions and he was quite familiar with his rants about the texture of onions by now.

"Yes, sir. Right away" She quickly exited his office. He still wasn't used to humans being on his island, he typically only had animal ghosts with him or his kids if they weren't busy it was quite strange but he was trying to turn down his Vladness.

He stopped to grab a water bottle and started to head to Damian's room. He knocked on the door and waited. Dead silence met him, the white walls of the hallway was only makeing it worse. He forced himself to not think of the past, his whimpers while he had to stitch him together again for if he made to much sound they would hear him , while slowing opening the door.

He was thankfully asleep, and his fever seemed like it was going down. He packed up the damp towel and started to dab his forehead again. His eyes started to stir.

"Vlad?" His now much younger godson questioned looking even younger he seemed small for his age but he was like that in his past life too.

"I'm here." The sigh of relief spoke for itself. Damian stole the hand not currently in use, a familiar reminder that was common practice for them. His eyes closed again. He took the quiet moment to lament on each of his kids.

Jasmine, the oldest, once told him he was her rich and eccentric uncle. She never needed him in the ways her siblings did. She only lived with him on college breaks anyway. She never needed him to pay for her college, she had no shortage of scholarships. While he loved her, they were still distant. And then she was gone.

Dan, he had adopted him in his originak timeline after...an incident. Dan was always difficult in ways his siblings weren't. Dan was most similar to him, he was half of him afterall, and this often caused many different fights between them. Dan being full ghost often lived with Clockwork anyway. He'd always love him but things were always going to be messy between them.

Ellie, his blood daughter and Daniel's clone. The only one that outright considered him her father but she was very independent and he typically only saw her on weekends too busy traveling the world to have a movie night with her dear old dad. He loved her, but they fought alot she always wanted more independence and he just wanted to see his daughter.

Daniel or Damian now had always seemed to need him the most. Sticking around Amity Park even after the GIWs attack. Always asking questions about being a ghost or being an adult really. And even before that he could often find him somewhere in his house after his patrols around Amity he asked him a few times why he came around even before he had redeemed himself and could only ever get " because it's quiet but now you're here so I have to go. See ya fruitloop" and when Damian came to live with him his friends were usually there and sometimes he felt it was more a teenagers clubhouse than a mayoral manor. But he was really the only constant in his life. And in the beginning he was too injured to be alone, floating at the edge of fading away forever, so they were constantly together and they grew closer and as much as Vlad always saw him as a son he doubts Damian sees him as a father. Jack was his father and Madelyn was his mother. He knows that he still sees them as his parents even after everything he was willing to forgive them. He would never admitt it but sometimes he's glad they never came back as ghosts.

And konner...He wasn't really sure about him. He was his son, his clone he created with Superman. While he of course still had Luthors memories, and luthor seemed to love him but he often pushed him aside. He was second to his goal of killing Superman. He would have to work really hard to repair their relationship but first he needed to get to the Infinate Realms.

Soft knocking broke him out of his thoughts. " Come in."

"Sir. Your food has been prepared." Susan pushed in a large cart with 3 tiers. While this life seemed to be all about the pinnacle of opulence, his first was spent majority in bachelorhood, enough said about that.

She parked the cart close to the bed but not enough to be a hindrance. Damians eyes fluttered at the light but stayed still.

Susan looked at Damian in barely hidden concern and he could tell that Susan Darnaby, mother of three boys ranging from the ages of 24 to 15 had strong maternal instincts. Her oldest apparently worked at the Daily Planet and was apparently the main breadwinner of the family after his dad passed away a few years ago from cancer leaving the family in serious medical debt. He might have reread everybody's file and maybe everything he could find on them. The last thing he needed was one of his employees calling cps on him for stealing a child.

"He has already benefited from his rest last night, this medicine will have him in tip-top shape in no time. There's no need to worry." He attempted to reassurance her.

"Of course sir." For some reason she didn't look very reassured and with once last glance at their hands, left quietly.

"Whuz her." Damian mumbled from where his head was stuffed slightly beneath the pillow to block the light from getting in. He snickered and fixed the pillow. Damian pouted.

"My assistant, Susan. You know she has a son around your age." Damian looked positively scandalized.

"Vlad! I am not dating anyone that is affiliated with you!" He sat up and wacked him with the pillow.

"Oof. Ow." The pillow didn't really hit imhim hard it was worryingly gentle, something Damian would never hold back on he once challenged him to a pillow fight but stuffed his with rocks and we both ended up give each other stitches using the bathroom tiles to ice their bruises.

"You know i never said anything about dating, my boy. Now let's see what was prepared." Damians breakfast consisted of small cake like pancakes shaped like stars with bananas and blueberries arranged like a small constellation. While his was some larger normally shaped pancakes with sliced strawberries and bananas arranged around the outer rim. The other two tiers consisted of several scone and jams and of course clotted cream after on the second day Ellie went on a loud rant right outside the kitchen on how offended she was to not be served clotted cream. The last tier consisted of several small deserts and muffins. He even spotted Damian's favorite muffin, blueberry cheesecake. Or well in his previous life at least, he placed it on his plate anyway, couldn't hurt to try.

"I'm not really hungry." Damian waved him off.

"You have to eat to take this medicine and I know you haven't eaten since you flew in last night, or even longer. Most of this stuff we can cover up and leave out, so you can eat it later if you want." Damian hated when he used logic in his previous life but from what he can remember about his few meetings in this life he liked logic and academics and was quite ahead according to Brucie.

Damian begrudgingly ate the muffin, some fruits and a messily cream and raspberry jamed scone. He only had a bite off the corner star of the pancake before deciding he wasn't a fan of the recipe. Vlad ate both of his pancakes, most of the fruits on his plate, a chocolate muffin, and a cream and apple jam scone. Unfortunately the peace couldn't last because as soon as he deemed Damian had ate enough and gave him the medicine he decided now would be the time to talk.

" I think I'm pregnant." Damian stated calmly staring into his tea cup.

Vlad dropped his own cup and watched the beautiful fine china shatter.

"Your...What?" He spluttered.

"Technically incubation. Dan and Ellies bodies completely destabilized and I merged with their cores to save them. It's something Frostbite briefly taught me." He continued.

Thank god.

"Why didn't you just start with that like a normal person. Are you okay? Is anything hurting not feeling alright?" He could hear himself growing more frantic.

"I'm fine Vlad. There not parasites. Well ellie isn't atleast. We'll have to check with Frostbite for everything else, so we'll need to stsrt the portal as soon as possible"

"You'll need to take the medicine for at least a week before I let you start working around such heavy machinery, but i suppose you can do some calculations up here."

"What! I have to get to Frostbite. How do we know we're doing the right thing? What if...I...do something to hurt them." His voice grew quiet and he closed his eyes both arms came to reach across his stomach and his legs slightly raised and he started to hunch over himself.

"Oh, Damian. I've read about incubation before. Ghosts only allow them selves to merge in such a way with people they must truly trust. If they merged with you, nothing will go wrong. Nothing you can do will hurt them." He moved as he was speaking, sitting down on the bed now. Damian and him had reached the same height in his last life but now his new body was much larger, in both height and muscle, than Damians short height and lean muscle. Made even smaller by him shifting into a ball.

"I don't know. I still had so much to learn and what if we can't open the portal again?" He leaned into him his shoulder more level with his head.

"Have you no trust in your old man? I opened the portal on my own last time with only minor Fenton thievery, thank you. Besides,The only setback I've faced here are the corrupted ectoplasm pools." Damian snickered at him, so he knew his joke wasn't for naught. Until he went rigid suddenly.

"Wait what corrupted pools?"

"The green ectoplasm on this island has pooled together somehow and corrupted itself by laying dormant for sometime. Instrsd of the typical cool and chilling effects the green usually has it seems to be almost acid like. Bubbling and burning things, but I've constructed a purifier that seems to be working well enough." He explained quite confused by Damians sudden change in attitude.

"Why didn't I see i before? Ancients this is worse than i thought..." He stood up suddenly, beginning to pace and run his hands through his hair.

"Slow down. What's going on?" He questioned aiming for placading him, Damian needed rest and minimal stress while sick AND incubating two cores.

"The Lazurus Pits! Their corrupted ectoplasm! Grandfather harnassed them to bring the dead back and get pseudo immortality." He stopped dead at the last word but his back was to Vlad. He's never heard of Lazarus pits before...his grandfather? Thomas Wayne was immortality? But he's dead!

"Thomas Wayne is...immortal?" He questioned as such.

"What? What made you come to that insane conclusion?" He turned to face him, he looked concerned like Vlad was the crazy one muttering.

" Your grandfather?" He looked like a fish, blinking and moving his mouth like he wasn't sur what to say.

"That's actualy not even the craziest thing ive heard actually. No, Ra's al Ghul, the Demon Head is my maternal Grandfather, my mother is Talia al Ghul." What the fuck.

" Brucie Wayne slept with the demons daughter?" Damian couldn't hold back his laughter anymore and burst into laughter turning into a coughing fit, that shook his ribs, and he leant over like he wa going to fall. Vlad quickly moved to support him.

"I'm fine, fruitloop. I just need some water." Vlad steered him to lay back down on the bed. "Stop it fruitloop, your not even my..." he didn't need mind reading powers to know what he was going to say.

" I know." He still tucked him into bed. Moving to turn out the star nightlight out.

"Batman is my father. Batman is Bruce Wayne" I think I'm going to faint.

"The other..." "my siblings." "Of course, no matter what universe we're in you have a crazy family." " You can't talk you made a clone with your archenemy in both lives AND added your own DNA both times."

"It was an accident the first time!" He spluttered.

"Not the second time!" Damian returned.

"I think you need a nap, young man." He sassed.

"Vlad! I am not a baby!" He ignored that remark.

"I'll have Susan wake you up at lunchtime and we'll go to the lab. Is that acceptable for you?"

"Tch." Damian turned around and closed his eyes. He finally succeeded in turning off the lights.

"Sleep well, son." Closing the door softly.

Whatever was a half-ghost to do?

‐--------

Clark Kent was an avid hater of the waiting game. Although he was no stranger to it. It had been now a week since Damian disappeared. Tim had called his sons and broke the news. They had quicky wrapoed everything up and flew back. Jon had yelled at him for hours about having to hear about Damians disappearance from Tim. He just didn't know how to break the news to him. He knew Jon felt betrayed by him especially because they were finally stsrted healing their relationship after everything. Even worse because Jon had finally confided in him how he felt about Damian and now he didn't even tell him when he was kidnapped.

From what he's heard from Bruce, Jon can't hear his heartbeat, but knowing Lex he's most likely kept behind lead so not a totall loss of hope it just means they need detectives not supers.

So he was back at work after parting with Lois he had headed to the break room to get more coffee when he heard it.

"So what Lex has a few sick kids and you think child trafficking? We can't lose another income, mom. Ignore it. Please." He heard his coworker, one he often listened listened in to as his mother coincidentally worked at Lexcorp.

He focused his hearing onto the mother's voice on the other side of the phonecal.

" You don't get it. I can't just ignore it. He experimented on those kids then put them to bed like it was just another day. And then suddenly the kids are gone and the next day another kid is here? It's not right! Something is going on. Wveryday he wakes him up and they est breakfast then they go down to his private lab and dont come out till lunch sometimes until dinner. Last night they didn't come out till midnight and he carried the kid to his own bedroom. There's something going on and I've seen to many rich men take advantage of young children. I can't ignore this again."

Oh god, what if Bruce was wrong about Lex somehow figuring out his identity. What if he noticed him at a gala and took a liking to him. As a reporter he done countless stories on people in high positions who took advantage of their positions of authority to hurt kids. Lex had never seemed that way to him but how well did he really know him anyway? He had some kind of breakdown that changed him anyway. He needed to talk to someone who was familiar with people like this.

He has to call Jason.

A/n I took this chapter to hash out my thoughts on a redeemed father vlad and kis kids. Danny is obviously his favorite, but he does love all of his kids they just don't feel the need to stick around Amity Park like I think Danny would. Danny is also his character foil, and I wanted to tie in both parallels into both him and bruce with vlad. So that is not Canon vlads backstory but something i thought about with the fact he is desperate or obsessed with the idea of a family. Also, if you see any inconsisties between Damian and vlads' povs and the "attack," their might be a reason hint hint. I also wanted to say that vlad and lex are both quite similar in concept but vlad in my au decided to become better for his kids and to choose them first not like lex who loves kon in his own way but is still second to his own mission. vlad very much is more vlad than he is lex mostly because he sees himself in lex if he didn't choose his kids over villainy. While Damian and danny are now more of a mix between each other. I like to think that the danny that saw a random girl who just said she was his cousin and just rolled with it would just roll with the flow if he was reincarnated. I also wanted to bring up the fact that vlad and Damian will pick up the pace and be a lot more worried as you'll see next part and right now the bats are in a disarray trying to find him. Also the supers I only had Jon age up 2 years older than Damian cause he will be a bigger part of the story and I needed him older hint hint he has his mother's purple eyes in this story.

[the-kr8tor]

Hii, i have gone through all your ffs love them ❤️❤️, i got this video on my fyp and it just made me think of hobie. https://vm.tiktok.com/ZGJnnLQDt/ It could be a us babysitting kinda thing

Hello, angel! Thank you for requesting ❤️

Pairing: Hobie Brown x fem! Reader/ Spider-punk x fem! Reader

Synopsis: you and Hobie play pretend with Mayday's toys.

Tags: no use of Y/N, no specific physical description of the reader, cw food mentions, FLUFF.

It's Fluffy Friday!

ʕ⁠·⁠ᴥ⁠·⁠ʔ

Finally putting Mayday down for an afternoon nap, you stretch your tired arms from carrying the toddler a bit too long. Walking towards the living room you hear Hobie cleaning up Mayday's toys.

"What is Peter feeding that kid? I swear she keeps growing every time we babysit" you stop in your tracks when you see Hobie casually scooping up fake ice cream into a plastic cone. He sits criss crossed on the carpeted floor, in front of him is the plastic ice cream stall.

The toy is from Peter's dimension, Hobie's curious at how the fake ice cream sticks to the plastic scoop with ease, And how it stays on top of the plastic cone without it falling. He whispers a question to no one, 'magnets?' The toys look tiny in his hand.

You giggle, "can I order uh, chocolate with sprinkles"

Hobie immediately plays with the bit, "we don't have sprinkles, just plain chocolate on a cone" he plays the part of a disgruntled employee, Hobie says his line flatly.

You stifle laugh, "fine, three scoops of plain chocolate, please" you sit in front of the toy ice cream stall, Hobie holds the plastic scooper in his hand.

"No three scoops, just one or two" He points at the stall, various 'flavours' of ice cream are displayed in pairs.

"What kind of ice cream shop only offers one to two scoops?"

"There's a dairy crisis" he says the sentence so matter-of-factly, you can't help but guffaw at his straight face.

"A dairy crisis?!" You play along, Hobie cracks a small smile.

"Yeah, and our CEO's lactose intolerant, he doesn't let anyone have their fun. Also he's a wanker for being a capitalist pig" he spits out the last word with so much malice.

You laugh loudly, covering your mouth with your hand so that Mayday wouldn't wake up from the noise. "Two scoops then, in a cup please" you say in between laughs, there's tears in your eyes from all the laughing.

"We don't have bloody cups!" Hobie gestures towards the toddler sized stall, "do you see any cups here?!" Hobie plays his part well. If not for the small smile he has, you would've thought he was actually mad.

You wipe the tiny tears welling in your eyes, "okay" wheeze "okay" giggle "um two chocolate in a cone, please" you manage to let out.

Hobie scoops the ice cream angrily, plastic thumping against plastic. "Here" he hands the toy sundae in your hands.

"Thank you," your laugh finally subsides, clearing your throat. You act, patting your imaginary pockets for your wallet. "Ah, I think I forgot my wallet at home" you smirk at him, "do you take kisses instead?"

Hobie finally cracks, laughing deeply. "Little shit, come 'ere" He lifts his arms up towards you. You scooch, closing in the small distance between you.

Hobie cradles your cheek, thumb grazing your lips before he leans in. You feel his lopsided smile through the kiss, you sigh, looping your arm around the back of his head, the fake sundae in your hand almost stabs him on the cheek.

You pull away breathlessly, "whoops" pecking the side of his face as an apology. "I'm gonna have to report you to management for the bad service" you joke, peppering kisses all over his jaw.

"Snitch" he whispers with a lovestruck grin.

ʕ⁠·⁠ᴥ⁠·⁠ʔ

Thank you for reading! Please consider reblogging if you enjoyed it ❤️

[cryptid-crow-writing]

So, I had a thought. Like we all know and, for the most part it seems, enjoy a good “Good Vlad Masters” fic. But on that: Chill Vlad. Like not just a good uncle/parental figure/person, but a generally chill dude.

Like Vlad bought Dairy King’s Castle? He did it to have it restored and for DK’s benefits while allowing Vlad to have a base.

Vlad obsessed with Maddie? It isn’t cause he loves her romantically, it’s cause he saw her as his sister and saw that she was spiraling into her fixation with ghosts.

Vlad hates Jack? It’s cause he saw Jack was a problem long before the safety hazards.

Give me a Vlad that is a generally mellow individual who is “Good Dad” level along with “Cool/Chill Uncle” vibes.

Give me a Vlad who is rich, but dresses closer to a college frat boy and less like a stuck up CEO. A t-shirt, a flannel over shirt, a set a jeans (ripped at the knees or not), and a set of freaking converse or something similar.

All I Can see is:

Vlad never expected this. When he reached out to Jack and Madeline to check on them, cause despite everything that was his ‘sister’ damnit, he wasn’t expecting to find out they had a little girl and an infant son. Oh. Oh fuck. The panic that coarse through his body. No. No, he couldn’t leave those poor kids to fend for themselves. He could feel the very visceral change in the direction his obsession suddenly took. From protecting Maddie to protecting her kids. Holy shit, he never thought something like that could change so sharply, the ache in his core due to how sudden the change was, leaving him bent over, grasping his chest, gasping. He had to step in. Maddie and Jack shouldn’t have ever had kids. Oh Ancients. He had to get Jack and Maddie to give him the kids. He had to be subtle, Jack may be a moron but Maddie definitely wasn’t. If he could just figure out how to get them to sign over custody. Fuck, it may take a while. In the meantime however he can step in with an offer of baby sitting. He… he paused. Was this actually something he wanted to do? Or something his core was pushing him to do? Both. At this point it was both. He wouldn’t let Jack and Maddie hurt those kids the way they hurt him.

[vclvetfleur]

Obedient Chapter 6

roman roy x fem! reader

Summary: You have been spending a lot of time Roman that you finally had time to spend with Jess. You both go out for shopping and invite someone to your dinner plans.

Warnings: veganism, implied addiction problems

Word Count : 4.4K

Notes: So sorry to do this to my meat lovers and dairy lovers, but OC is canonly vegan. It'll be a funny bit later on, but as a vegan I approved it. sorry.

Chapter 6: goodnight texts

You said your goodbyes to Roman for the day, finishing some things off before you left his office. You were just waiting for Jess to finally finish up with Kendall so you could both head out together for the day. You got the text from Jess before heading to the elevator to meet with her. She turned the corner and sped walked over to you, quickly pulling you into an embrace.

“What are you both up to?” Kendall asked in a friendly way. Despite having to deal with Roman being really nasty to him, he was kind of cheery. It could’ve been genuine, but Jess knew that was just the front he put on around everyone to make them think he was stable.

Kendall was anything but stable. He just hid it well enough by being more likable than his siblings and more understanding than his father. He played his cards right and he was strategic. He wanted to gain everyone’s respect and he thought by trying to be the cool guy that he would keep it. He wanted respect, but his need to be liked overpowered his personality entirely.

In reality, Kendall relapsed again a couple weeks ago. After trying to take down Logan and spending hours and hours out of his days to take Logan down, after Shiv’s wedding he completely cowarded to his father again. He was an empty shell of the man he was before.

Worst of all everyone knew he relapsed again. He tried to act as if he had it under control and as if barely anyone knew, but we all saw through it. He was a complete mess. Roman even had to fish him out of trap house after smoking crack with some strangers he found at a bar. Kendall’s addiction turned into a darker turn than it had ever done before. And no one could stop it, no matter how hard they tried. Truth is, Kendall didn’t want to be sober. He just wanted to forget.

He wanted to stop thinking about it.

And being high was the only way to stop it.

But of course, Logan knew and used it to his advantage. It was another play he had on hand to take advantage of his children. He always had some kind of leverage to make them bend at his will. He had a lot, while they had none. It was like playing Monopoly with toddlers for him. Roman’s weird and queer behaviors. His fear of intimacy and the fact the last person he had sex with was the girl who blew Tom, and he couldn’t even manage to even properly do it. And everyone knew. Cause every girlfriend Roman had outted his sexual problems to everyone out of frustration.

Kendall’s intense drug issues and the fact he was too weak to run the company. He couldn’t even properly overthrow his father. Kendall’s whole life was set up for CEO, but Logan wasn’t ever planning to step down, even in death. Kendall was just Logan’s bark dog. He did what he asked in hopes to get the position he’s fought his whole life for. He wanted to be nothing like Logan, but everything like Logan at the same time that he got his weaknesses and strengths. An absent father and backstabbing family member to not just his father, but his siblings too.

And Siobhan. Well, the only thing Logan had against her was she was a woman and a liberal. Two things Logan couldn’t stand. He saw those qualities as weak. Powerless. She was never going to be taken seriously. Cause Logan created an atmosphere in the office that allowed the man at the top to use their power against women. And he gave them the courage to use their manhood to exude that power. Along with his company ATN spewing alt-right propaganda. He knew the company would not take Shiv seriously. They would think she was gonna change too much around there and weren’t going to have ‘creative freedom’, as if Logan wasn’t already feeding them his own agenda.

Reality is he didn’t stand anywhere politically. Just whatever would give him more power and money. Cause whoever got elected did so because of him. He looked for men who were powerful, but also scared of Logan and his power. And he spread an agenda to the American people. Logan knew his influence. And knew none of them could live up to it. Cause they were all too soft, despite fighting to be as aggressive and terrible as him.

Kendall just wanted to be like Logan despite what he said. But also wanted to be liked. He didn’t know which was more important.

Jess felt pity for him. She had seen him go through it. She knew Kendall more than most. He practically treated her like a personal diary.

She just gave him a comforting smile and answered for the both of you. “Well y/n just got her first paycheck and we were gonna go shopping for new office clothes for her. And to get dinner, but don’t be scared to call me if you need me.” She reminded him. He nodded before stepping in the elevator with the two of you. “So-uh-where are you both gonna get dinner?” He asked you both. You looked at Jess, assuming she would know since she was the one that offered. She didn’t think about it though.

Kendall always seemed to be stumbling over his words. It kind of seemed like he over thinks about everything he said. He taught too much about it. “No clue, we were probably gonna grab a table at whatever was near and good enough.” She confessed.  Kendall tried to find of a spot for the two of us before finally coming up with one.

“You both- I think at least- should go to- it’s incredible really, its new- to this place. Uh fuck- what was it called?” he tried to remember. He spent a while before finally remembering the name. He snapped his finger, pointing at us “Boulud Saud!” He seemed so proud of himself for remembering it. He didn’t really remember names of places like that. Just where they were.

“How do you even spell that?” You laughed, pulling it up on your phone. You all left the elevator together, you and Jess heading towards the subways as Kendall seemed to follow.

You unfortunately always had to look up the menu to places. Because you were scared to admit this to Roman, but you were had been vegan for a couple of years now. I know it was truly a crime of humanity and to some people’s culinary experiences, but you were. Kendall tried his best to spell it out before you all just stopped on the street to find it. Unfortunately for you it didn’t work out for you. “I can’t. Sorry.” You apologized to both of them. Jess because you needed to now look for another place and Kendall for wasting his recommendation.

“Uh why?” he asked. He took it as a blow to his personality. As if he messed up already. In his head, you rejected him because you had an issue with him. His fear of being unliked surged up. You took a deep breathe dramatically, putting your wrist over your head, reaching out to Jess. She just giggled, holding back, watching the dramatic scene play out. “Don’t hate me Kendall, but I- I don’t eat meat. Or egg. Or cheese. Or anything with animals. Ugh I’m awful I know.” You whined, hiding your face.

Kendall was just happy enough that you were actually being friendly to him. You didn't dislike him. He really thought you would since you worked with Roman. But you weren’t like everyone in the building. You were like Jess. You weren’t raised with money. You didn’t find a need to pick and play games like everyone. Work was work. And Kendall wasn’t use to it. He was so use to everyone using things against him and using him for their own gain. He just laughed at you. “Wow. I-I-I don’t know if I could forgive something so repulsive” He played along, stuttering over his words as he usually did.

“It’ll be fine Ken, we’ll just go to one of our usual spots.” Jess reassured him. He nodded and figured it was his time to depart from the two of you. A sadness washed over him again. He had to be alone. Alone with whatever he was thinking. With all of his anxieties. Jess saw it. “Unless you don’t mind meeting us for lunch. It’s not really fancy though. It’s just normal people food.” She shrugged. You looked at Jess then Kendall, you weren’t sure why he had to join since you did expect just a day alone with Jess. But you wouldn’t mind it. Just caught off guard.

“No-uh-no-it’s alright, you both just have your-uh-fun girl thing.” He tried to make himself not look pathetic. But he did. That whole family was. It was a tragedy to watch. Almost Shakespearian.

“No come on, is it cause you don’t wanna eat with normal people?” You asked jokingly. He tried to rebuttal, but you caught him off before you could make him more nervous and upset than he was. “We’ll text you the place before we get there. We’ll see you there.” You offered. Jess appreciated how sweet you were being. It was only 40 minutes of your day. You both had the rest of the day to be spend with Jess. You could just end up at Jess’ apartment later.

You waved goodbye to Kendall, locking arms with Jess. You walked your separate ways as you started your day with Jess. You both decided against the subway and walked to Soho instead. It was only a 15 to 20 minute walk, and it was a beautiful day out. A bit chilly, but just chilly enough that it felt nice.

“So you and Roman.” Jess started as if it was going to turn into a talk. “You enjoying the job?” This felt like a trap. Depending on how you answered could cause Jess to have a talk with you and you weren’t sure if you wanted to have one yet.

“Yeah, Roman is actually trying now.” You shrugged. You avoided her looks.

Jess knew you. She knew how to spot certain hints about your life. You spent 2 years together in a dorm room. Jess was 2 years older than you and moved out, but you still hung out after and even spent nights with her after the semester was over. So, you basically lived with her for 3 years, technically, considering all the months you spent with her during your summers and winters off and even after you left college, you spent weeks with her before you got your expenses together. So, if anyone knew you, Jess did.

“I’ve never seen him at work this much. Last time I saw him at work, he came on his window.” She brought up. You stopped, your jaw dropping almost immediately before you slapped your hand over your open mouth. You looked at her, practically screaming WHAT?

“No fucking way!” you hysterically laughed. You needed to make fun of him for that later. Honestly it wasn’t entirely too surprising. You could expect that from him. “I thought that shit would end after leaving minimum wage.” You tried to say your sentence, but you couldn’t stop laughing.

“Nope. Most fucked up, like a month before you got here, Logan pissed in Logans office.” She bit her bottom lip in amusement, trying to keep herself from breaking out laughing on the street.

“SHUT UP! OH M- What the fuck is wrong with this family?” You shook your head. It was the craziest thing you could ever expect. This is like reading stories of what your favorite celebrity used to do when you could get away with terrible shit.

“You don’t even know the beginning of it. It goes so much deeper than that. That was all within a month or two.” She revealed. You practically begged her to tell you more, but she had too much already. If someone were to find out she said anything, she could get in serious trouble. All thanks to the NDA that they were made to sign. You let it go. You didn’t want to press too much.

You and Jess went from luxury store to luxury store to buy you suits and dresses for work. It was so nice to have Jess around. She knew what it was like being like me. She went through the same exact thing when she first got hired. She knew exactly what kind of mistakes to avoid and what to actually buy. Her first mistake was buying something from Zara.

You had been carrying bags throughout each store, not even paying to attention to how much you swiped, cause no matter how much you did swipe, it didn’t decline. How much did you get paid? You decided to check later. Right now, your arms hurt, and you needed to put the bags away. Thankfully Jess’ apartment was only a couple blocks away.

You rushed inside once Jess unlocked the doors and set everything down. “Fucking hell…” You moan, rubbing your wrists. You laid on Jess’ couch before looking at your phone to see texts from Roman. You decided to change his name to Rome. It was better than what he had put in your phone before.

You giggled, immediately texting back since you hadn’t been able to respond the entire time you spent time with Jess. You and Roman were just getting close. It was normal. You both just enjoyed being around each other. That’s all. Jess found you smiling a bit too hard at your phone. You had a certain glow to you. Jess has seen this glow before. Back in college whenever you’d pick your boy of the month. “Ooo who’s that?” She asked, sitting next to you, leaning down to see your phone to only see Roman’s name again. Her face dropped. Someone fucking dig up Jesus Christ or find him immediately cause God is dead.

“Nope. Fuck y/n, this can’t-“ she was way to stunned. You put the phone down and looked up at her.

“Oh calm down, we’re just being friendly.” You reassured her. You sat up, placing your phone face flat. You never did that around her. Only others when you wanted to hide something. But you didn’t do it consciously. It just was a reflex.

“Y/n promise me. You cannot get involved with Roman. I love you way too much for you to go down this path.” Jess held your hands in hers. She noticed the phone. She knew something you didn’t. You thought she was being extremely dramatic. You didn’t have a crush on Roman. He was just nice to be around. Disgusting. But nice. It was fun. You both had fun with each other.

Besides he was your boss. You’re professional. You knew what could happen if you got involved. You already thought about it. You knew a relationship with Roman could never exist unless you wanted to risk your job possibly. You read the contract. It’s not that you’d be terminated, but there were consequences you weren’t willing to take. But it was also about the public scrutiny you weren’t willing to deal with.

“Nothing is gonna happen Jess, he’s Roman. And plus, you know me. I would not ruin a good thing for something so stupid.” You scoffed. “Hey, don’t forget to invite Kendall to dinner.” You reminded. You just needed to find a place that he wasn’t going to be too uncomfortable in. You weren’t sure if he’s eaten anywhere normal before. He probably had $40 appetizers wherever he ate. You both settled on Dirt Candy. It was a restaurant you always wanted to try but couldn’t afford. It was a Michelin star restaurant despite the name and the appearance of the outside of the restaurant. But the fact it had a star was probably enough for Kendall.

You picked your phone back up and continued to respond to Roman, except trying to hide it better. You held back your smiles enough and tried to not stare at it as often. But it didn’t fool Jess, she saw right through your façade.

You were just making stupid jokes and updating each other on what was happening. You told him you had went shopping for clothes earlier.

‘you gonna do a little show for me tomorrow?’

‘can you ever not sexualize everything i do?’

Jess decided to ignore. She trusted your judgement enough, but entirely, but enough.

“Okay he’ll get there by the time we do.” Jess tried to get you organized. You pulled away from the screen and asked her to repeat herself. She sighed and just walked, knowing you’d follow. You grabbed your jacket and followed Jess around as if you were her assistant now. But you had always followed her around realistically. She was like the older sister you wish you had. You admired her. She was the coolest person you knew. There was nothing she could do wrong in your eyes. Except when you argued about mediocre and mundane things. Then she could do a lot wrong.

You got to the restaurant with Jess, waiting for Kendall. You both just got your drinks.

Jess liked spending time with Kendall. Her job was stressful only when Kendall made his life stressful, which he did a lot; especially recently. She felt pity for him. She saw his potential and knew he can make it far if he could just get over his insecurities. He was smart. He knew what he was doing. But his ego was getting in the way of his success. His dad was constantly in his head.

You watched as the tall black haired man walked into the restaurant searching for you both. He noticed the two of you and made his way over. You and Jess got up to greet him was a hug before sitting back down. You waved the waitress down so Kendall could order a drink for himself as well. He got a menu and looked over what to order. But he couldn’t for the life of him settle on anything.

“Uh-hi. So how was your-uhm- what did you guys exactly do?” He asked you both.

“We just went shopping. I needed a wardrobe for work.” You shrugged. You already had your choice set in place. Jess too. You both just waited for Kendall to make a choice. “I’ve honestly been wearing the same button up for the past couple of days. My outside clothes don’t really fit the office.” You shrugged. “I’m shocked you had anything that wasn’t either see through or more than 5 inches of fabric.” Jess overly exaggerated. You mimicked her before flipping her off. “Wow Roman is really rubbing off on you.” She joked.

“How dare you compare me to him?” You let out a gasp. Your lip curled into a smirk, sipping on your drink. “Credit, you knew me before. So, you know for a fact I’ve always acted this way.” You tried to point out, but Jess really wanted to know your feelings for Roman. She tried to see how’d you even react to him being brought up in conversation. But you barely had one. In fact, you tried to even avoid texting him because you wanted to prove it to her. You did not have a crush on Roman Roy.

“Where’d you two meet again?” Kendall interrogated. Everything was usually about him usually. He did love to talk about himself and what he did, but since his life has been crashing down, he had nothing to brag about, nothing to uplift himself.  

“Oh ya, a strip club. Jess was my pimp.” You clearly lied, Jess kicking your foot lightly under the table.

“College.” She corrected you.

“I think Jess is right, Roman is rubbing off on you.” Kendall said with a quickness that apparently the entire Roy family had, as he stood with Jess. You looked at him in shock. “I grew up with him. I should know.” He raised his hands up in defense before bringing the waitress over as he finally settled on something.

“I’m not that bad though. Come on, right?” You asked the two of them as they ignored you to order their food, essentially giving you their answer. They were joking, but they did assume you were acting like Roman purely because of how much times you both spend together. Kendall more so because he didn’t know you before, Jess less because she knew you were always this quick and witty. But she couldn’t help but remind herself of the way you were glued to your phone. She had to see it for herself in person though. How did you act around him? “Oh, screw you both” You huffed, crossing your arms. “You’ve started to act more like Kendall then.” You tried to fire back; your chin raised up. But really Jess hasn’t. She’s just more grown since when you first met.

“How?” Jess asked amused. Kendall leaned in amused as well to hear what you had to say about him.

“Well, you dress nicer now.” You tried to make any point you could. "You're a lot classier." You mocked, flicking your wrist and batting your eyes.

“Yea cause of work.” She corrected you. “Boo try again.”

“Fine uhhhh….” You thought for a while.

“I don’t think she has anything.” Kendall pointed out to Jess. She nodded at him, agreeing as she watched you with amusement as you tried to pull something out of your ass.

“Oh! I know! You’ve been more docile. You’re not a party girl anymore.” You pointed out. But again, you were only pointing out the fact she’s aged and gotten more mature than when you had first met.  “She used to down at least 8 shots a night in college.” You lied to Kendall.

“Kendall parties.” Jess pointed out. Unfortunately for you, you didn’t understand the double meaning.

“Yea at rich people stuff.” You made a point, but you didn’t know Kendall enough to know how he was. I mean just a few weeks ago he was at a club doing coke with his cousin. Well not with. He made his cousin do it. But he had to pretend to be sober in front of everyone, despite everyone knowing that truth.

“No-I don’t- how about one night I’ll show you.” He offered. You raised your eyebrow, wondering if it was really the best idea to do so. “It’ll be a good time. Trust me.” He left the offer on the table for you to take. You looked at Jess, her shrugging at the request.

“Okay. Next time Kendall Roy is going to party, I’ll be there.” You laughed.

Kendall wasn’t as bad as Roman tried to paint him as. You didn’t understand the dynamic they had. You didn’t know where all this resentment came from. Anytime you seen them, they plotted against the other to ruin the other. They seemed to hit a rough patch.

Honestly, the only issue was they had hit was Kendall trying to recruit people to vote Logan out. Roman was supposed to vote for it, with Kendall, but Logan refused to leave the room. It was a sight to be seen. No one had seen Logan so angry before, despite his health not being in the best shape. He threatened to fire whoever voted against him. And he did. He even took Roman to put his hand down before he got the chance to put in his opinions. And Romans eagerness to please his father mixed with fear of his father, he did what he was told.  And Kendall continued to try to ruin the company. He wanted it gone if he couldn’t have it, not even considering his own brother. He said it was because he wanted Logan to step down, but it was only because it wasn’t his. He thought it was his birth right. But after the accident, Kendall was back. But he knew his future with the company was practically nonexistent now that everything transpired. Now Roman was being offered everything he was promised. And the two brothers had no idea, but so was Shiv. Logan was setting them both up as he did with Kendall years ago as a kid.

You just felt sorry for them. They didn’t seem to have a lot of people around them or anyone to fight for them. They were both dealing with their father and decided to turn their issues into a competition rather than seeking refugee within each other.

The Roy family was an American Tragedy.

The three of you spent awhile in the restaurant together, even after eating. When you finished you just ordered dessert and drinks. Jess watched over Kendall though. She did truly worry about him. The three of you actually had a nice time. Kendall was nice. He was a lot more respectful than Roman was. Just not as intense. He had an intensity that was just different from Roman’s. His was more comparable to Logan’s intensity. He was fun, but still very corporate to you. He was always careful of what to say and how to say it. He always wanted to play safe. No wonder Logan set him up for CEO. If you didn’t know any better, you thought Kendall would end up running Waystar one day.

You split up, giving Kendall a hug before leaving him alone. “Don’t forget to invite me to your totally awesome and not uptight rich people party!” You shouted, walking backwards as you cupped your hands around your mouth to amplify the noise. He nodded, putting a thumbs up.

You turned around, walking with Jess. “He’s fun.” You started.

“See, that’s what I’ve been telling you. That’s why I was so upset you’d be Roman’s assistant instead.” She reminded you. If only Jess got to know him, maybe she’d like him better. But there was no changing her mind. She’s seen how Roman has been. Especially to Kendall. Roman was vindictive. He didn’t even feel any sympathy for what Kendall was dealing with, in her eyes. He just did Logans dirty work and pushed him farther down.

You and Jess had just the entire night together before you decided it was time to get home. You were exhausted. You just decided to get an uber, knowing carrying Louis Vuitton and Chanel and other designer bags down your neighborhood at 1 am in the subway wasn’t safe.

You laid on your bed and finally got the courage to look at your bank account. Before you look login to your bank account you saw one last text from Roman.

‘night. see you tomorrow’

You smiled to yourself, powering your phone off for the night.

Note: Sorry about the end of the chapter if it's a little sloppy. I wrote it while half asleep.

Chapter 7

[thearchercore]

Honestly I am just shocked with how Charles has all the time to do this?? Side quest no. 19384737.

Also the fact that it's in Milan, interesting (where Pierre lives..). And the article talks about a statement from Charles where he mentions a 'healthy' product. Is this is low fat, low sugar, dairy free gelato or something..

to be honest, i think now with a new (and possibly a better) contract, charles is finally taking the business opportunities he always wanted to invest in.

that being said, there's a team behind it and the brand being connected with charles' name does not mean he will be there to personally scoop the ice cream himself lol.

he most likely came up with the concept, assisted with the business pitch and his team took care of the rest. it's like celebrity brands -- you see millie bobby brown have her own skincare brand but she still focuses on acting and producing.

it's very easy to have business side quests when you know the right people -- it's sort of a collaboration (the celebrity name increases revenue and reach and then it can be ran by a different ceo/manager who makes sure the operation functions properly)

[ceasarslegion]

I've never watched Beastars but it's like "the furry anime" right? But not actually hentai... I mean it's on Netflix like seemed maybe less controversial than some CLAMP stuff.

Im a big beastars fan and it does have a lot of sexual themes, but its also very clearly labeled as an adult anime and manga. Like its not for kids, netflix rates it as mature and i find all the manga in the adult section of the graphic novels shelf at the library.

Essentially, its about a society where all animals (other than fish and insects) evolved into humanoids with human intelligence, but its still divided along the lines of predators and prey. It plays with ideas of what a society like this would look like, and how carnivores would have to coexist with herbivores despite their very real need to consume animal protein, and if insects and eggs and dairy products would really be enough for them. And how things get even more complicated when you take into account various sizes of different animals and how some need more protein than others, and how some would have more traditionalist upbringings than others. The main character is legosi, a large grey wolf who falls in love with a small dwarf rabbit, haru. They go to a non-segregated high school and are 17 and 18, respectively. Legosi has a very strong sense of justice and is very timid and mild-mannered and gentle, which is the opposite of whats expected of him as a member of the largest canidae species. He does bare his fangs a lot, but really only to protect others.

Theres a lot more in it, like a black market for real herbivore meat frequented not by gang members but respectable office workers and a lion pride mafia family, and the "beastar" that gives the series its name refers to a title given to a young up-and-coming animal who fosters unity and peaceful coexistence among carnivores and herbivores. Beastars go on to become CEOs, politicians, celebrities, etc.

So yes, it is a furry anime, but the narrative is really interesting and well thought-out imo. Theres even moments like when jack, a labrador retriever, is told that he shouldnt be hanging out with hyenas and wolves even if theyre all canidae because his species is not like those other carnivores.

I also really like the first op:

[boyslit]

actually did i ever ramble on here about my 'fake'/fan hsr region? aside from posting Maraschino's combat kit and lines because he's my special 4★ princess

it all kicked off bc of this picrew 👇 my friend found and i loved making little elves with pink hair and then they started putting a story together in my head without my say-so lol

The Stellaron affecting Celarys is actually a half of one and its slowly going mad trying to find it's other half (which is also trying to get home to its counterpart).

The planet itself is largely agriculture and manufacturing for an extremely large confectionary conglomerate, and millennia of farming the land and consuming food grown on it has eventually changed the populaces' hair and skin to be tinted bright pink :3 there's some kind of harmless chemical that does this, don't worry too much about it

So that Stellaron half that's out and about was originally harvested as a gemstone, used to decorate an intricate clock and sold far away for like a bajillion dollars. But the Stellaron half wants to go home, and so anyone who has it ends up wanting to visit Celarys...

Previous owners had either had the clock stolen from them or ended up visiting Celarys without the clock, suddenly couldn't remember why they'd wanted to come here so bad and identified the clock as a cursed item and promptly got rid of it, and eventually it ends up in the stash of a rare antiques dealer. The Stellaron half is fed the fuck up at this point, and is basically making this poor man lose his mind, filling his head with nightmares and threats of her doesn't take this fucking clock to some pink little planet at the edge of some galaxy. He finds someone there interested in strange antiques and sells it to the CEO of the confectionary company, President Marinelo Rousseau, who delights in it's cursed history bc he's a weirdo and displays it with his collection of other histories strange antiques.

And where there's a Stellaron, there's mental manipulation and disaster, and also often the Astral Express :3

The president's mental focus and emotional stability take a major hit, and his son Marcelle who's being groomed to take over his position when he retires in a few hundred years starts worrying big time. Between him and the trusted CFO they manage to get him to take a leave of health, but his condition worsens, he starts slipping in the middle of the night to god knows where and returning with wild eyes and dirt under his fingernails. (The Stellaron is making him dig to find his other half buried in the mountainside. He really should have just asked the local miners about it but both halves are half-mad with the grief of not being whole and desperation to reunite, so neither the Stellaron pieces nor the president are making good choices)

Meanwhile, since this is a Stellaron we're talking about, there's all sorts of shit going haywire. The president's recent insistence on increased production and potential deal with the ipc, the stress on the agricultural and manufacturing workers leading to dissatisfaction and organizing in both factors, lobbies in the government from not only ag and manu but also mining because they're also in proximity to the buried Stellaron half and are feeling a desperate need to expand their tunnels unconnected to production directives

The face of the agriculture union movement is a tough rancher named Anaïs who honestly didn't mean to be the driving force behind all this but increased demands are putting stress on her beloved dairy cattle and thus must be stopped.

There are of course weather disturbances affecting crops and livestock and also daily life on the planet. The governor and her assistant are running around putting out fires, so to speak, regarding these issues, especially because the agricultural and livestock products are a huge part of their economy. There are a few Senators looking to take advantage of the chaos but they're less fleshed out lol

eventually the Astral Express crew gets wind of this, March and the trailblazer get excited about the snacks they'll be able to find there, and they arrive to help root out the Stellaron

Marcelle has called his older brother (Lieutenant) Marinelo (Junior) back to Celarys to help. Marinelo arrives about when the express does, recognizes the big train and knows they might be able to help, after news of all the places they've helped out with great disasters.

The dock where the express starts isn't that far from the heart of the main city Rosaire, but Marcelle sets them up in the guest manor on their grounds both as an apology for having to beg their help and to station them closer to important spots in Rosaire and the surrounding land. Let the investigation begin!

Marcelle begrudgingly allows them to contact his little brother Maraschino who is, for most appearances, a drunken philanderer wasting his father's money on personal pleasure... but the truth is that he's got a masterful network of connections and information and has been keeping an eye on the goings-on around the city ever since his dad went off the deep end. He does try to hit on Himeko though and March and the TB close ranks to remind him in no uncertain terms that their mom that himeko is off limits! especially to *you.*

Dan Heng assists with information on stellarons and previvous encounters, Lt Marinelo allows him access to the Rousseau family library which is quite extensive. also. there is a mutual crush there. :3c and Marinelo is worried about acting on it because humans live such a short time compared to Sucrelves which is on average 500 or so years

during the investigation they cross paths with a journalism student who's trying to track down these weird rumors about the Rousseau Confectionary Company's president and his mysterious illness. Laurent Vivier is also keeping tabs on, and writing articles about, the work the governor is doing and the workplace organizing, but this has been his secret passion project ever since he heard the rumor about the president sneaking out at night to go digging in the mountainside with his hands.

anyway that's kind of where i've gotten to with it. but it just keeps kind of expanding on its own, and when I get stuck sometimes I go back to the picrew and play around with character ideas lol

pink hair is fun :) but also dangerous, because sometimes you end up with an entire new region for your favorite game in your head

[fuck-customers]

Holy shit.

I shattered the milk door.

So I started crying cuz I thought it was my fault it broke even tho all I did was open it. And it went pop and shshshsjsh and shattered.

Turns out the hinges have had a work order in place for months. The door was recently replaced but put in crooked, with a hinge that didn't fit. So it held up longer than my boss thought, he said it was a matter of time and he's glad it didn't happen to a customer. And that bc they took forever replacing the hinges, now they need to replace the whole door. So its the fault of the handyman company that the big bosses have us use. But I was still like f u c k.

We covered it in cardboard.

First day as lead associate. Im killin it.

Jeez There have been so many issues like that in my company over the last 30 years. My two most memorable ones are the time I worked dairy and was unloading the milk truck and the manager and the truck driver came into the back of the truck because the manager thought the driver was shorting us. Well when they left the manager didn't raise the lift all the way back up and I didn't notice and got stuck and the guy helping gave a huge shove and the pallet jack flew in my direction and the entire pallet of gallon jugs fell off the lift from about 6ft off the ground. the entire back lot was white for hours. And smelled like a mouse's ass for weeks.

Then there was the safe. This thing is 4ft wide by 4ft deep by 8ft tall made from an almost solid brick of steel. The only opening was 3ft by 3ft door in the middle with just enough room inside for 6 cash drawers and rolled coins and a little slot for the deposits that only the armored courier could open. one morning there was a really REALLY loud CLANG kind of like a deep bell. The welds that held the door on broke and the door fell off and almost crushed the 4'3" head cashier. No one had ever heard of that happening before or since. People from cooperate including the CEO and the head of safety as well the same from the company that made the safe. the day they replaced the safe it took 8 guys (two per side) to lift that door up high enough to get the fork lift under it to load it on the truck.

-Rodney

P.S. I almost forgot when I was a bagger at 16 They had me run the floor buffer. It's about the size of a small ride on lawnmower you have to push around the store. I was doing an area on the frozen wall at one end of the store and I hit a floor drain that "someone" forgot to screw back in and shot the 3in round cast iron drain grille across the entire front end and it got stuck half way into a produce freezer. I didn't get into trouble for that one because according to all the accident reports none mentioned it being pushed by an under aged kid.

[mallowmaenad]

the whole situation with Lunchly reminds me of that company Bartholomew's Supper Outing where they found large amounts of lead in all the products that used their gold leaf and the caviar lunchable was like 90% salmonella. Also the CEO claimed ox milk didn't count as dairy

[dragoneyes618]

“From the river to the sea…”

Let’s talk about such a scenario in which Israel is erased.

7:00 a.m.: You wake up and try to unlock your iPhone to read email, but it won’t unlock.

Why? Because Face ID is Israeli tech. It was invented by PrimeSense, and acquired by Apple.

7:30 a.m.: Before heading to work, you go into your garden to make sure your grass is being watered.

Nope, can’t use drip irrigation. That’s an Israeli invention.

8:00 a.m.: You get into your car and try to turn on Waze so you can know where there is traffic.

It won’t open because Waze is Israeli.

8:30 a.m.: On the way to work, you almost lose control of your car because it didn’t notify you that you were swerving out of your lane.

That’s because Mobileye is based in Jerusalem.

9:00 a.m.: “Fine,” you say to yourself, “I don’t need Waze or Mobileye anyway. Soon my car will be autonomous.”

Nope. Innoviz is Israeli.

9:30 a.m.: You get to work and get ready to have your first meeting on Microsoft Teams. It won’t work.

All the AI on Teams? Built in Herzliya.

10:00 a.m.: You try to use your USB thumb drive on your computer. No go.

Thumb drives (a.k.a. flash drives or memory sticks) were invented by Dov Moran at Msystems, and acquired by SanDisk.

11:00 a.m.: You need to access some classified information but it’s behind a firewall. No way around it.

Firewall technology? Invented in Israel.

12:00 p.m.: You look out your office window and the sky is so beautiful, you want to take a photo.

Nope. Smartphone dual lens technology was invented by Israeli company Corephotonics.

1:00 p.m.: You have a lot of work to do. You fire up your PC but it won’t boot up.

Is it running on an Intel processor? Oh, yeah, that was designed in Israel.

2:00 p.m.: You’re getting really frustrated. Nothing is working! So you turn to Google, but even that won’t work.

Google builds many of its products in Tel Aviv.

3:00 p.m.: You decide to FaceTime your wife to vent your frustrations. Why won’t it work?!

Because voice over IP was invented in Israel.

3:30 p.m.: You’re really losing patience, so you go to your favorite instant messenger program to speak to a friend.

Nope, instant messaging was invented in Israel.

4:00 p.m.: You give up and decide to focus on work exclusively – you need to build a website.

Sorry, Wix is Israeli. You can’t use it.

5:00 p.m.: You get a call from your doctor. He wants you to come in because he saw something troubling in your last check-up. He wants to use the PillCam.

You have to inform him that’s a no-go. That’s Israeli tech.

6:00 p.m.: Since your car is unreliable, you decide to take public transportation. But your Moovit app won’t load for some reason.

It’s Israeli.

6:30 p.m.: You decide to do some shopping for a new car because it’s time to go electric.

Sorry. Better Place CEO Shai Agassi pioneered the infrastructure for electric cars in 2012.

7:00 p.m.: You get a call with bad news – your relative was recently diagnosed with cancer. He needs your help finding the best treatment.

Unfortunately, you can’t help him because many of the leading cancer treatments were developed in Israel by companies like Novocure and Vascular Biogenics.

8:00 p.m.: You’ve had a hard day and just want to chill out in front of your social media feeds. But none of your feeds will load.

Meta, parent company of Facebook, Instagram, and WhatsApp, has many offices in Israel.

9:00 p.m.: Time for a late dinner. You want to prepare alternative meats or dairy products.

Your supermarket doesn’t sell them, however, because Redefine Meat and Remilk are Israeli startups.

10:30 p.m.: You decide to read your book, but you can’t find your glasses anywhere.

That’s because you bought them on GlassesUSA, an Israeli company.

11:00 p.m.: Your last resort: Watch some TV. Wait – your Samsung TV won’t turn on!

Samsung has many offices in Israel, including Samsung Next, a fund that invests in tech.

You go to sleep and hope tomorrow will be a better day.

Here, try this new rhyme instead: “From the river to the sea, if Israel is gone, what will be with me?!”

[megaera-of-pigeon]

✨March Manwhore Madness✨ Official Commentary— Day 2

Gooooooood Morning, Nikkiblrs! Yesterday was quite the match—Loen moves on in the Shining League, while the fans’ beloved Vulture is out of the contest before it’s even begun! And over in the Love League, Commander Nidhogg went up against fierce competitor, King Sayet, and ultimately commanded his victory. We’ll be seeing more of both Loen and Nidhogg when we move into the Quarter finals. But who will they be up against? Well, that brings us to today!

Over in the Shining League, we have half elf royal bastard and CEO extraordinaire, that’s right I’m talking about Mercury! Going up against him today is none other than the charming young man who’s got it all—noble heritage, a high stakes career, a dairy farm where he can glisten attractively in the country sunshine—its Yeeso! Which of these men of noble Pigeon heritage who would rather spend their time anywhere but Pigeon court will be deemed the bigger Manwhore? Early morning voting appears to favor Mercury, but the day is still young, lots more votes to be counted, so Yeeso is not out of this thing yet!

But that’s not all, folks! Today is the Mercury family playoffs double feature! Stepping up to the voting block in the Love league, we have Reid Mercury himself! Like his grandfather, he’s known for his work as CEO, his difficult relationship for his father, and his oozing charisma that’s charmed many a heart in Miraland. But to claim the win, he’s going to need to overcome the fearsome challenge presented by his opponent, Fu Su! Cloud’s very own lost Emperor, a contemplative designer with a boyish, mischievous wit, raised by a deer and known for running merchandising fraud schemes—but does he have what it takes to continue on in the battle of the manwhores? You, the voters, will decide! Fu Su has established an early lead over Reid, but there’s plenty of more hours in the day and plenty of more votes to come.

[notwiselybuttoowell]

Cargill and ADM, two of the world’s leading livestock feed companies, helped to scupper an attempt to end the trade in soya beans grown on deforested and threatened ecosystem lands in South America, a new report alleges.

Soya is one of the cheapest available types of edible protein, and is in huge demand for feed for animals around the world; as our consumption of meat and dairy has risen globally, the need for soya has soared too.

But its production has been directly associated with deforestation in some of the most threatened landscapes around the world. Last year, in response to internal concerns and growing public awareness of the issue, 14 leading grain traders worked intensively to agree a ban on buying soya beans grown on some of those landscapes, including Brazil’s Amazon forest, the Pantanal wetlands and the Cerrado savanna, according to the report.

The ban would have imposed a backdated deadline of 2020 on soya buyers, and was expected to be announced at last year’s UN Cop27 climate conference in Egypt, the report said. The backdated deadline was aimed at preventing harvested soya already grown on threatened land areas from entering global markets, and avoiding the deforesting scramble a future deadline might have provoked.

But instead of agreeing the ban, Cargill and ADM “led the push” for weaker language in the final statement, according to one person involved in the discussions between the 14 grain traders before Cop27. “If Cargill – or ADM – had not taken those positions, the outcome would have been different,” the source said.

The Guardian spoke to several of the report’s sources who confirmed their quotes but did not wish to be named.

The soya agreement that was signed by the companies, included in the November 2022 agriculture sector roadmap to 1.5C, was seen as a failure by many NGOs. A group representing retailers including Asda, Aldi, Lidl, M&S and Tesco told Cargill and ADM the agreement was inadequate, inconsistent and insufficient.

The new report by Mighty Earth, an NGO which has previously called Cargill “the worst company in the world”, follows news that soya land conversion has surged in Brazil’s Cerrado. That rise is largely driven by the expansion of soya grown for animal feed, according to Mighty Earth’s CEO, Glenn Hurowitz. “If Cargill had signed up to the ban … the other companies would have followed the leader.” As a result we would not be seeing “the forests and biomes of South America bulldozed at such an alarming scale and pace”, he said.

Two other leading commodity companies, Amaggi and Louis Dreyfus Company (LDC), were committed to the soya ban initiative, Mighty Earth’s report said. Both have “stronger commitments [than Cargill and ADM] to end all soya linked to deforestation and conversion”, said David Cleary, director of global agriculture at The Nature Conservancy, an NGO. The term conversion is used to describe threatened ecosystem lands that are converted to soya plantations, whether forested or not.

[mariacallous]

Crisco is a vegan cooking fat and an icon of the Ashkenazi-Jewish American Dream. 

For over a century, the strange, oily gloop has graced kosher restaurants, holiday cookbooks and hand-scribbled recipe cards in Jewish homes across the nation, becoming a (contested) symbol of Jewish American identity and culinary tradition . 

But how did Judaism get to Crisco as America is to apple pie? The answer lies at the intersection of early 20th-century consumerism and Jewish American culture. 

First, we need to take a look at the origins of Crisco itself. Debuted in 1911 as a product of Cincinnati’s Procter & Gamble Co., it started as a strange solution to a strange problem. Textile production skyrocketed during the Industrial Revolution, leaving America with a surplus of leftover cotton seeds. No one could figure out what to do with them — until chemists learned to extract the oil and combine it with hydrogen, which created a cheap alternative to animal-based fats like lard and tallow. Initially, Procter & Gamble intended to use the new substance to make candles. But they ended up selling it as a food product, instead. 

The public wasn’t totally sold on the idea. Aside from sneaky CEOs cutting costs by substituting it for pricier olive oil, cottonseed oil wasn’t typically used in the food business. It was primarily intended for soap, artificial dyes and explosives. There was even some debate over whether cottonseed oil is really a food (spoiler: it isn’t; Procter & Gamble would later switch to other vegetarian oils). 

Eventually it caught on with the help of some clever, if somewhat dishonest, marketing. But sales still weren’t remarkable among established Americans. Given the product’s versatile non-dairy, non-meat nature, Procter & Gamble’s PR team decided to give a hard sell to the nation’s newly minted community of Eastern European Jewish immigrants. One 1913 newspaper advertisement, printed in English and Yiddish and distributed throughout the United States, made the lofty claim that “The Hebrew Race has been waiting 4,000 years for Crisco.” 

4,000 years! 4,000 years spent wandering through deserts and across the globe, all for… non-dairy shortening? Shockingly, the ploy worked; American Jews went wild for Crisco — and haven’t looked back since. 

There are evident perks: It’s kosher, and pareve, too. That means that, when she has Crisco on hand, the good Jewish housewife doesn’t need to buy both schmaltz — for meat — and butter — for dairy — thus saving money and resources. And, a hundred or so years ago, Crisco was considered (or, at least, marketed as) a healthy alternative to traditional animal-based cooking fats. 

But more important was Crisco’s cultural significance. For new immigrants, the feeling of belonging was vital. There was a constant struggle between old and new, religion and nation, and tradition and assimilation. Here was a practical solution that didn’t require compromise. Kosher enough for the rabbi, stylish enough for the all-American woman and economical to boot, Crisco was a tasty, practical reminder that you could be both Jewish and American — and be so with class and tact. 

Procter & Gamble’s 1933 cookbook, “Crisco Recipes for the Jewish Housewife,” cemented the product’s popularity within the Jewish community. Each recipe was printed in both English and Yiddish. Offerings ranged from traditional favorites, like kugel, to American icons such as southern fried chicken and macaroni salad — all, of course, with a generous helping of Crisco. Despite the economic hardship of the Great Depression, sales continued to soar. Over the course of a century, Crisco grew from its resourceful beginnings to the heart of American Jewish cooking. 

In recent years, though, Crisco has amassed slews of controversy. For one thing, it’s been condemned for ruining the magic of traditional (i.e., schmaltzy) Jewish cooking with its sub-par flavor. Perhaps more shocking is the revelation that Crisco, marketed as an “all-vegetable shortening” doesn’t actually include any vegetables — at all. Even though it’s no longer made from cottonseed oil, Crisco’s modern key ingredients, soybean and palm oil, aren’t derived from vegetables, or even fruits, but from grains. They’re not particularly healthy or environmentally friendly, either. So, while definitely a little more edible, modern Crisco is not exactly a huge improvement on its cottonseed predecessor. 

Why do we continue to use Crisco? I think that, like with many Ashkenazi Jewish cultural rites, the answer can be most accurately summed up by Tevye in “Fiddler on the Roof”: TRADITION! So next time you bite into a Crisco-coated latke, or hamantaschen, or maybe even fried chicken, you too can follow in the footsteps of our foremothers and savor the unctuous, oily flavor of Jewish American history. 

[relax-o-vision]

"aggressive vegans telling others what to eat"

Oh boy.

Clemens Tönnies, CEO of one of the biggest meat production companies recently called temp workers from romania disposable workers.

Imagine, being paid to stand on a spot and kill animals for hours on end, for bad money. People in the meat industry are treated almost as badly as the animals themselves with immigrants being stuffed in small containers for which they have to pay rent to the company they work for. They sleep in shifts, several people sharing a bed.

And that doesn't even account for what they do to other mammals, or chicken. The suffering throughout this industry is beyond anything you can imagine. It is so much and it's so hard to even say it out loud, just because of how cruel everything is.

And then people go "don't tell me what to eat or I will make it a feminist issue"???

Even if every vegan was as angry and aggressive as others claim, it wouldn't be nearly comparable to how aggressive the meat and dairy industries are.

What do you want? Should we write very nice letters to ask CEOs to please reconsider what they're doing?????

It's not our tone. People will look at my sandwich and get pissed about vegans even if I don't say anything. That happens all the time and I'm not going to change my tone anymore to accommodate others. It doesn't matter anyways.

And while we're at it, telling women, who make the majority of vegans, to change our tone is a very familiar theme as well.