#AND STILL DO!! I just don't know where ;u;

[sheepispink]

consider pt2 of puppy and simon but simon gets his shit together and theres a happy ending ORRRR one of the guys (price, gaz, soap) stops by and is actually APPALLED at how puppy looks and is being treated and they just get snatched up and taken to a better home while simon gets chewed out

i was going originally do a 2 in 1 but everyone got so excited so we'll do second first then MAYBE simon can get some redemption. anyway, this ones for u anon <3

PART ONE

Ghost had been home early that day for another reason as well: a two-week deployment that he’s supposed to be packing up for. 

Only once you fell asleep on the couch had he finally made his presence known and walked towards his bedroom. He doesn't tell you when he tightens the straps of his gear while his things lean against the door, a white sheet of paper left for you on the coffee table. He didn't bother telling you verbally, it didn't seem right to wake you—he couldn't if he tried nor did he have the courage to touch you either. Besides, he didn't want to deal with this right now, not having the energy for your whines, incessant questions or the pitiful look that you now wore even in your slumber. He’d handle all of this when he comes back, that’s right he’ll figure it all out after the mission.

You woke to a silence, again, and immediately noticed the shift of surroundings; by that, it was the note, the one that you couldn't read. 

So you waited, and waited, the day passing by slowly with little to no entertainment left for you to manage. At least when he was home he could navigate the apps like Netflix, putting on shows that make you want to giggle so hard that you had to stuff your tail in your mouth to ensure you made no sound. But no one comes home and so you spend the night alone, still waiting upon his return like the loyal dog you are. 

Thankfully, there’s an abundance of food for you in the fridge though you don't feel like you’re allowed to take any of it, afraid he’d appear out of nowhere and scold you. He never had before, and you still kind of hope he does one day, just to know he sees you. The third day is incredibly cold and despite the blankets you’ve swamped on yourself, your ears have flattened to preserve as much heat as possible. Huddling on the couch isn't doing much, and the thermostat buttons are near impossible for you to wrap your head around, left to shiver and wish that you had a bed to lay upon. Since he usually had no one else to worry about, he had it on an automatic setting so that his bedroom would be the only room heated during the night. It saved money in winter, and of course he never got cold, but now it was the bane of your existence. His room was off limits; he had firmly told you that, but there was only so much of the cold you could handle. 

You whined pitifully as you curled up on the floor in front of the bedroom door, desperate for a feel of the warmth seeping through the cracks beneath. Maybe this was all planned; perhaps some kind of loyalty test or to see how adaptable you were. The thought didn't comfort you though, well aware that you weren’t supposed to be an attack dog; you were far too weak for anything of the sort. Again, another night passed, alone and quiet.

The thunder was starting to scare you now, the great rumble haunting you every time the sun fell, and the sky began to grow darker. It made you hide beneath the dining room table, hands covering your ears as you sniffled quietly. It was too similar to the loud bangs in the facility, when one of you would be punished and the only sound heard was the slap of the whip against the metal pipe next to where the hybrid would stand. Likewise, it didn't help that the couple next door would argue more and more aggressively these days, screaming curses you couldn’t understand and slamming doors shut so loudly. Sometimes at night you’d hear the small patter of footsteps, a drunk walking through the flat, but you could only lay awake in the safety of the bathtub, hoping no one could get through the locked door.

It was only the seventh day when someone finally came by, the doorknob turning making your heart fill with relief knowing Ghost had returned, before quickly filling with dread when you realised it may not be him at all. You curl behind the couch, squashed to say the least but one of the best spots you can consider. Only a small glimpse of the door is visible from your hiding spot, a man entering only to reveal another following close behind. They’re both military men, strong and bulky, one with darker skin and velvety eyes and the other lighter, intense blue in his irises. As they approach the living room, you can see them better as they snoop around. 

“Where’s the pup?” The one with a mohawk says, eyebrows furrowed as he crouches to look beneath the table. You’re suddenly grateful you chose not to hide there. “Price said they should be here… maybe they’re in Ghost’s room?” They seem to know him which is a good sign, but you’re afraid now, wondering if this really was a setup, one to take you far away for good. You tremble as you think over it, unable to stop the tiny sniffle that escapes you. 

The brown eyes meet with yours, crouched at one end of the couch as you hide the best you can in the darkness that comes with it. “There you are. Are you going to come out of there? We just wanna make sure you’re doing okay whilst he's on deployment.”

Deployment? What’s that? You didn't understand the word, nor could you formulate much of a response to him, only staring back at him in return. He carefully reaches out, taking one hand to see if you’ll be okay with him touching you before using both of his hands to slip to your waist and gently pull you out. You’re light–or maybe he’s just that strong.  Shorter than him too, thanks to your crossbreed genes. He has no problem settling you on the couch cushions, the mohawk man approaching once he realises, but you’re caught off guard by the man who lifted you, who now had a hand outstretched towards you. You take it and he shakes it gently. “I’m Kyle, but you might hear someone refer to me as Gaz too.”

The other one is not as careful as Kyle, walking right up to you and eyeing your tail before crouching to meet your height, just so he isn't as tall and intimidating as he had been before. “Ye don't look too happy lass, bet you’ve been missin’ Ghost a lot, hm?” He reaches out his hand too, shaking yours a little more fervently than Kyle had, but you just look blankly back at him. “Johnny, or Soap, up to ya.” It’s weird, you had been begging for someone to come by, someone to fill the void in this apartment. But now you were silent, unknowing what to say, what to do, waiting for orders rather than the playful innocence you used to own.

Though Kyle is more concerned about the temperature in the room, seeing as you have goosebumps climbing up your arms. “Why’re you so cold? Did Ghost not show you how to change the thermostat?” You shake your head, showing your first sign of response before he picks up the note Ghost left. “Oh, there are instructions here though? See, Ghost wrote you turn it clockwise and then press the set button—”

“I can’t read.” Finally, you speak, sickness filling your gut when his eyebrows raise like that, the fur on your tail stilling as Soap’s touch. You don't have to look behind to see Soap’s reaction, the shame already thick as it filters through you, from your head down to the jelly feeling of your legs. 

The two of them excuse themselves, whispering quietly to each other in the kitchen. They keep nervously glancing back at you, murmuring things like ‘Shouldn’t Ghost have known she couldn't read?’ and ‘Price said she was a bubbly little thing, only a little shaken up. What happened?’ 

You’re not sure if you should tell them that your ears can pick up on everything they're saying, especially due to your hybrid genes. It seems a little rude to intrude, so you eventually just settle on holding your ears down with the palms of your hands instead.

Eventually they return, Soap gently brushing a finger over the curve of your ears and nudging your fingers away. The fluffy ears atop your head flicker up, perking once more as he scratches at the base. “How about you come with us, hm?”

He had expected gratitude, maybe even a hug for saving you from the perilous neglect you were clearly experiencing, but you don't, just stare back at them silently. This is it, you think. This is where you’re stripped away from the one you’re supposed to be loyal to, too useless to stay in line like you should’ve. “Did I.. fail the test?” You eventually murmur out, half expecting for Ghost to pop out and give you that absent glare, the one that makes you tremble more than this cold ever would. Gaz just quietly shakes his head at you, confused before gently sitting on the couch beside you. “No—no. You’re clearly not doing well, and Ghost is still on deployment so—”

“What is deployment?”

“He didn't tell you that either..?”

Soon enough you’re wrapped in Soap’s thick jacket as you ride in the back of their truck, eyes lost on the surroundings outside as they mutter amongst themselves. You had told them you could hear them, but they didn't seem to mind, and now they discussed quietly what they’d need for you whilst you stayed at base. After a bit of back and forth, Gaz explained to you that he wasn't taking you away from Ghost, just looking after you while he was out. He looked noticeably worried though about the idea of leaving you with him again. Something nags at you though, a little parasite saying it's because of the fact he deems you as annoying as Ghost does—if Ghost hadn’t told them already that is.

They lead you through the halls, Kyle’s gentle hand in yours that you just let him take; it’s not like you’d ever fight back anyway. People were staring though, soldiers who looked abnormal in their tight gear, dangerous weapons carelessly handled and yet you’re ogled at, watched and scrutinised. It feels like punishment enough, to be seen, and you’re starting to wonder if this is what it would have felt if Ghost really had talked to you. Your hand subconsciously squeezes Kyle’s as you step into Price’s office whom they had called up earlier, nervously explaining the situation to him. Now he greets you warmly, albeit looking a little too tired as it is. But he doesn't show it in his manner, gesturing for you to take a seat which you do, albeit very quietly. You remember him; he had been the one to leave you in front of Ghost’s door, murmuring empty promises that he’d warm up eventually, and you’d just ‘have to be good for him’. 

“Bet this deployment has been hitting you hard. Let’s have a talk, hm?” He takes a seat on the couch opposite you, your hand somehow still in Kyle’s who takes a seat beside you but not too close, allowing some space for you to breathe at the very least. “How’s living with Ghost?” 

You’re quiet, almost silenced, but he knows you can and will speak since Soap had told him so. There’s not much point in this conversation with them, at least that’s what you’re convinced. Forcing the wrong puzzle piece wouldn’t work, just like shoving you with an owner just because he has some issues to sort out. Sure, it was better than being on the streets, and you were excited at first, wondering if this was actually where those hybrid disappearance cases really ended up. A warm home, hot food and someone who treated you well, not as a princess but as a person. Now it only felt like a countdown, a series of stages to make sure you were given a fair treatment, but the end goal was always the same—you would return to the streets.

A warm hand on your shoulder snaps you out, blue eyes looking straight at you. “Lass?” They must’ve been watching you whilst you were lost in your head, swimming deep in your thoughts, because now they’re all staring intently for a response you can't give.

“Okay, how about yes or no questions? Price offers, and you slowly nod your head in response. Ghost was still yours though, or rather you were his. You refused to demonise him, refused to cry and wail about how he’s shown you nothing but misery, he wasn't that bad—but that was true, would you even have to bother defending him?

“Has he been feeding you?” Nod

“Bought you clothes?” Well, he tasked a soldier with the budget, and now you have a good few sets available to you. Nod

“Was your tail like this before he left?” Nod

The two younger soldiers share a glance, one that you can feel burn into your skin. 

“Did you tell him you couldn't read?” Shake.

He raises a brow, looks at the others and then back to you again. You’re getting bored by this now, the drag of this all, the inevitable end playing with your heart. “Did he not ever tell you how to change the thermostat then? Kyle said it was freezing.”

“He never speaks to me.”

It’s like a pin has dropped in this room, somehow the bustle soldiers that filled the halls grew quieter. Or maybe it’s because Soap hands have curved around your waist, pushing your face into his chest, the one that’s dripping with salty wetness. You don't remember your voice trembling the whole time, nor your hand squeezing Gaz’s so hard. But it hits you like a tidal wave, the realisation that comes with the silence, the hurt that comes with it. You knew, but you didn't really let it sink in– how you were treated, how he acted, how he hated you. And now you shake, hard, hushed voices of comfort fading as your eyes squeeze close, hands clenched near your broken heart. 

Taglist: @dis-plus-fanfic-reblog-writes @alyssajofreitas @asksergantdrift @pinkfqiry @gogeroni @s-a-v-a-n-a-34 @thetastewassweeter @dreamtofus @milanriol @xsoftdead18 @zozo-spooks @calicocelt @kiwijustreallylovesfanfiction @ddaikko @softhandsofgingercat @iiriam

[gyeomsweetgyeom]

hi!! I had an idea for a funny/ prank type fic for frat boy jaehyun!! It’s that one trend where the girl talks about getting a wax appointment (or some other appointment) after a really long time and plays it off as a guy waxes her which usually gets the significant other really confused thinking “a guy waxes you..?” I HOPE U KNOW WHAT I MEAN 😭😭 have a good day💞💞

anoooooon!!! THANK YOU FOR THIS IDEA!!!!

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁.

⋆⭒˚.⋆ what do you mean, he? ⋆⭒˚.⋆

(cw: f!reader, TikTok trend, profanity sugestive, Jaehyun is such a fucking loser (affectionate) in this)

where the girl talks about getting a wax appointment (or some other appointment) after a really long time and plays it off as a guy waxes her which usually gets the significant other really confused thinking “a guy waxes you..?”

"Oh baby!" You sing as you push that door open to Fratboy!Jaehyun's room.

It's a handful of days before his birthday now and all week you've been doing the prep you need for a very romantic and heated night with your own Valentine Boy. You'd gotten your nails done, been doing face masks, done a few hair masks, gotten your eyebrows done, and finally today, "guess who got her coochie waxed!"

Your exclamation is met with a "hell yeah!" from down the hall and a flushed Jaehyun scrambling away from his desk to shut the door behind you.

"Ok, love the news, love the mental image, but what did we say about announcing things like that around here?" Jaehyun asks with rosy cheeks.

"But you guys talk about your dicks and balls all the time, why can't you hear about my coochie?"

"Trust me Sweets, I want to hear about her day and night, but I don't want everyone else to hear about her," Jaehyun chuckles while pressing a kiss on your cheek.

You throw yourself onto his bed, turning to watch him settle back into his chair. He rubs your calf softly, "how was it?"

"Hurt like a bitch, but I'm getting used to it. Ash is pretty good about soothing the pain and has good tips for aftercare and all that," you explain.

"Ash? Didn't you used to go to a Jane or something?"

You smile at him, finding it endearing that he listens to what others would consider to be useless details, "yeah, but Jane is on maternity leave, so now I'm seeing Ash. He's good too—"

"He?!" Jaehyun exclaims with his eyes wide with shock.

"Um, yes, he. Is that a problem?" You ask with a confused tilt of your head.

"A guy waxes you, Sweetheart?"

"What is so confusing about this? Yes, my waxer, Ash, is a guy." You state, still not understanding what his incessant questioning is about.

"Sweetheart, another guy is looking at your... lady bits. Like all up and intimate up there while you're probably like spread eagle and showing yourself to him. Shouldn't you only be like that for me?" He asks, speaking slowly and softly in the hopes that you'll understand his point of view better now.

You roll your eyes and push his hand off your leg, "Ash is a 50 something year old gay man who is married and talks about the recipes he most recently made while he's ripping hair out of my 'lady bits'. Can I make it any more clear that he's not interested and more importantly, I'm not either!"

You stand from the bed, throwing your hands up as you continue, "I mean, hello! I got waxed for you! For your birthday! Duh!"

"You know I don't need you to do anything like that. I'm sorry Sweetheart," Jaehyun apologizes, grabbing your hips and tugging you closer to him until he can nuzzle his head against your stomach, "I just went a little crazy thinking about another guy looking at my girl..."

"Your girl? Jae, guys look at me all the time—" you say with a look of confusion until you're interrupted by a single finger against your lips.

"Not you, my girl," Jaehyun mumbles, dragging his finger down from your lips to the waistband of your pants, "her my girl."

You push his head away with a scoff, "oh fuck off, Jaehyun. Coochie privileges revoked until your birthday."

"Damn..."

[suiana]

hi hi hii!! I saw your requests are open so may I pleade request for more yandere classmate oneshots/fics/headcanons anything that is a yandere classmate content cause I really love your writing and those yandere classmates hcs/oneshots you wrote♡♡!! if you need me to be more specific here's a suggestion/scenario:3...(that's a bit too specific if you don't mind hehe)

Yandere classmate transfer to reader's school and class. Yandere meets reader and boomshakalala typical yandere scenario where he falls inlove with reader. Yandere finds out that reader is getting backstabbed and bullied by their classmates. Reader is an extrovert and silly but like can't do anything about the bullying so they just ignore their classmates comment. Reader can be gender neutral or fem, whatever feels more comfty for u to write:>>! yan is a male!

Also, if you're in a writer's block, u don't have to force yourself! Also jst ignore this if u don't feel comfty writing this. Take of yourself and sorry if this is a bit too specific or demanding !

xoxo - Anon

hey anon! you just pulled me out of my writers drought so please have this for valentines

Yandere! classmate who's the new kid and is trying to fit in. Right, the average new kid experience. You're not popular, not a loner, just somewhere in between and trying to get by with all the horrors school can throw at you. No one has enough time to bother with others when they have to focus on themselves.

But there is.

You know how there are some people who peaked in highschool that take out their sadness on others? Yeah, that's right. Those people. And he just so happened to walk into one of these sessions.

Some grown ass man pouring milk over- oh, it's you.

Yeah just like how there's the losers who peaked in highschool, there are the popular kids who remain popular throughout their life. Aka you. And he's fallen for you hard.

It all began one fateful day... When he bumped into you while running on 2 hours of sleep and simply passed out because of the force at which he walked right at you. That's right. He fainted from walking into you.

Anyway, when he woke up, he found out that you had dragged him to the nurse's office and had stayed right by his side until he woke up.

How fucking cute.

He was definitely attracted to you. That was for sure, he still could feel it even when he was still woozy. I mean, you were his type from head to toe! Physically at least.

But now you're telling him you stayed by his side and waited patiently by his side until he woke up? You've got him hooked. So he gave you his number, got you to be his friend, and everything else fell in place.

He started noticing you around campus, talking to everyone and socializing like a freaking butterfly. Figures. You were clearly an extrovert and loved being just an absolute sweetheart. Sweet and kind to everyone around you. He would give you the world if you asked for it.

Then, he started noticing the bullying. The whispers, backhanded compliments... Just everything about it enraged him. It's bad enough that people are being mean, it's even worse that they're called your friends. How could they do such a thing to you? You were a blessing to be around! These people should be grateful that you even wanted to befriend them! Hell, they should be grovelling and begging on their knees for even as much as thinking wrong of you!

The worst part of it all?

You don't retaliate. Or rather, you can't. These "friends" of yours are all kids of rich and powerful people. And you? You're just poor old you, unable to talk back in fear of them ruining your reputation and maybe even worse. They could have you removed from the school, falsely accused of a crime... They're scum of the earth and they know it.

He hates them.

He hates them.

That's why he's taken it upon himself to get rid of them! No problem if he isn't as powerful or rich as these... "friends" of yours... Who can fight back when they're dead after all? The dead don't speak, they can't. They're the best type of sinners, people who've dared to lay their filthy hands and words on your beautiful soul.

Of course... He doesn't let you know that. You're too kind for this world. You'd freak out and have a panic attack if he told such a thing to you! You wouldn't understand. He wouldn't want to scare you anyway. You think of him as just another tired student that's your really nice friend. So he's kept all this hidden away.

But right now? When he's faced with this? Milk? On you? While you're just... Forced to take it all?

How can he not act out?

"You think this is funny?"

His hands are on that losers neck in a second, depriving him of any oxygen possible. Damn you, damn you, damn you. This waste of space should just die now. He was even laughing when he was pouring the fucking milk over your head? Unacceptable.

Simply unacceptable.

"You're a fucking loser."

"You smell like piss and shit, did you piss yourself?"

"Not so much of a big guy now, huh?"

This guy's body is larger than him, muscle and veiny all over. Yet... His body was slowly losing... to him? An average joe?

Then he hears it. Your voice.

He gets pulled out of his rage by your voice. Oh... Your sweet, sweet voice. It's like an angel's touch, the warmth of spring after a cold winter. Usually it would be comforting to him, make his heart soar and face warm. Right now though? it's sending nothing but dread through him. Shit, he's exposed himself.

"Uh... Fuck, I didn't mean to-"

He's stammering, bumbling on his words like a fool. No, god no, he's messed up now. You'll surely hate him and think he's a violent creep. You'll never want to talk to him again and-

-You reached out to him and mutter a thanks? For standing up for you? With that smile and gentle hands? What was that? Did you just ask him to release the guy and go on a walk? Was that a date? He hopes it's a date. Ah, it's on valentine's too. Do you like him? Is this a sign? He's not overthinking it right?

...

Ah.

He's so cooked.

[bloomzone]

2025 : #18 THE ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT BURNOUT

i feel exhausted. And I don’t mean like "Oh, I need a nap" exhausted y'all know exhaustion that sits in ur bones that makes even the smallest tasks feel like moving a mountain Even when I do get some rest like sleeping for 8h do breathing techniques I still wake up feeling like I’ve been hit by a truck. And not a small one I'm talking an 18-wheeler, full speed (call it whatever u want) . I was tired all the time yet somehow also restless. I wanted to do something, but I also didn’t want to do anything. I was stuck in this weird, miserable limbo where everything felt pointless, but at the same time, I was stressed about not doing enough. Like, how does that even make sense?And honestly, it got to a point where I wasn’t even living anymore I was just existing. Just floating through days waiting for the next one hoping I’d feel better but never really doing anything about it. Because when you’re that deep in burnout, it’s hard to even believe that you can feel better.

But you can. And I know that sounds cliché as hell but listen to me for a second. If I could drag myself out of that deep, dark hole, you definitely can too. And I’m not saying it’s gonna be easy, but I swear to you, it’s possible.

ᡣ𐭩 sᴛᴇᴘ ᴏɴᴇ: sᴛᴏᴘ ᴛᴀʟᴋɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ʏᴏᴜʀsᴇʟғ ʟɪᴋᴇ ʏᴏᴜ’ʀᴇ ᴀ ғᴀɪʟᴜʀᴇ

If someone talked to you the way you talk to yourself you’d probably wanna fight them Like imagine your younger self sitting right in front of you. If they were struggling, feeling drained, feeling like a failure, would you yell at them to “get their shit together” and call them lazy? No, right? You’d probably comfort them, tell them it’s okay, tell them they don’t have to be perfect.

So why the hell are you so mean to yourself?

Burnout doesn’t happen because you’re weak or lazy but it happens because you’ve been pushing yourself too hard for too long bu experience cuz when I study every single day like NOO stop wake up early,homeworks,school and the same loop go for 1 month I burn out for maybe 15days after (like rn) And let’s be honest, most of us don’t even realize it’s happening until we’re knee-deep in exhaustion. You keep telling yourself, “Oh, I’ll rest once I finish this” or “I just need to push through a little more,” until one day, your body and brain just quit on you.

So the first step? Start being nice to yourself. Start talking to yourself the way you’d talk to a best friend who’s struggling. Because you are not the problem burnout is.

ᡣ𐭩sᴛᴇᴘ ᴛᴡᴏ: ʀᴇsᴛ ʟɪᴋᴇ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʟɪғᴇ ᴅᴇᴘᴇɴᴅs ᴏɴ ɪᴛ (ʙᴇᴄᴀᴜsᴇ ɪᴛ ᴋɪɴᴅ ᴏғ ᴅᴏᴇs)

I know resting sounds like the most obvious advice ever, but do you actually do it? Because scrolling on your phone for five hours doesn’t count as rest. Lying in bed while spiraling about everything you should be doing? Also not rest.

Real rest means giving yourself permission to slow down without feeling guilty. It means doing things that actually recharge you so don't force urself to do ur hard tasks like intense workout at 6am saying yes to extra tasks or project ... But say yes to take walks , listening to music, watching a comfort show DO ANYTHING THAT MAKE U HAPPY not everyone have the same (happiness detox) so yeah . And most importantly, it means not punishing yourself for needing a break.Because pooks you’re not a machine. You weren’t built to be productive 24/7. Even your phone needs to be charged, and you’re out here expecting yourself to run on 2% battery every day? Yeah, no wonder you feel like shit.

ᡣ𐭩sᴛᴇᴘ ᴛʜʀᴇᴇ: ᴛᴀᴋᴇ ᴀ ᴅᴀᴍɴ ʙʀᴇᴀᴋ ғʀᴏᴍ sᴏᴄɪᴀʟ ᴍᴇᴅɪᴀ

i know. "But I just use it to relax." Do you? Do you really? Because last time u checked, scrolling through Instagram or tiktok for hours and comparing your life to a bunch of people who only post their highlight reels doesn’t exactly scream relaxation.

Social media is draining u .fr u don’t even realize it half the time, but it’s constantly feeding your brain unrealistic expectations. One second you’re watching someone’s “That Girl” morning routine, and the next, you feel like a failure because you don’t wake up at 5 AM to drink matcha and do yoga on a balcony.

And don’t even get me started on doomscrolling. Like, do I need to know every bad thing happening in the world the second I wake up? No. But do I do it anyway? Also yes. And then I wonder why I feel like shit before my day even starts.

So hear me out pookie log off. Even for just a day. Delete the apps if you have to limit time . Go touch some grass. Read a book. Hell stare at the ceiling if you want. Just give your brain a break from the constant noise. Trust me, you’ll feel a million times lighter.

ᡣ𐭩sᴛᴇᴘ ғᴏᴜʀ: sᴛᴏᴘ ᴍᴇᴀsᴜʀɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴡᴏʀᴛʜ ʙʏ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴘʀᴏᴅᴜᴄᴛɪᴠɪᴛʏ

I used to think that if I wasn’t being productive, I wasn’t worth anything. Like, if I wasn’t working, studying, or doing something “useful,” I was just wasting my life. And if I had a day where I didn’t get anything done? the self-hate would kick in.

But fr your value is not based on how much you do. You are not just a machine made to produce work and complete tasks. You are a human being who deserves to exist without constantly proving yourself.

Think about it .. do you judge your friends based on how productive they are? Do you stop loving someone just because they took a lazy day? No. So why do you do it to yourself?Taking a break doesn’t make you a failure. Resting doesn’t make you lazy. And slowing down doesn’t mean you’re falling behind. Sometimes, the most productive thing you can do is give yourself space to breathe.

ᡣ𐭩 ᴛʜᴇ 𝟷-ʜᴏᴜʀ ᴍᴇᴛʜᴏᴅ: ɢᴇᴛᴛɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʟɪғᴇ ʙᴀᴄᴋ ᴀғᴛᴇʀ ʙᴜʀɴᴏᴜᴛ

U feel exhausted, unmotivated, and even simple tasks feel like a challenge. You know you need to do something, but damn you can’t even bring yourself to move. I get it.

So here’s the deal We’re not fixing your whole life in one day buuuut Instead, we’re using the 1-Hour Method—because when you’re burnt out, committing to an entire day of productivity feels impossible. But one hour? That’s doable.

Step 1: The One-Hour Reset

You don’t need to “fix” everything. Just commit to one hour of doing something that will make you feel 1% better. That’s it.

⏳ The Rules:

Set a timer for 60 minutes.

Pick 2-3 small things that will make you feel lighter.

Do them with zero pressure. Imperfect action > no action.

Examples:

⏰ Minute 0-10: Get out of bed. Wash your face. Brush your teeth. You don’t need a full “that girl” routine, just refresh yourself.

⏰ Minute 10-20: Make your space 5% cleaner. Not a full deep clean—just clear the trash, fold a blanket, or open the window. Small changes, big difference.

⏰ Minute 20-40: Do one small productive task—answer an email, write one sentence of an essay, organize one folder. Just something that reminds you that you can do things.

⏰ Minute 40-60: Move your body. Stretch, walk around, dance to a song—anything to shake off the mental fog.

One hour down, and I guarantee you’ll feel even slightly better than before.

Step 2: The 1-Hour Rule for Self-Comparison

Nothing drains your energy more than constantly feeling behind in life. Comparing yourself to others? Yeah, that’s a fast track to burnout.But the people u’re comparing yourself to? They have bad days too. They feel lost too. They struggle too. You just don’t see it.

So for the next hour try this:

Write down 3 things you’ve accomplished last days or months No matter how small. Maybe you learned a new skill, took care of yourself on a rough day, or simply kept going when you wanted to quit. That counts.

Unfollow or mute accounts that make you feel “less than.” If it doesn’t inspire you, it’s draining you Simple.

Shift your mindset. Instead of “Why am I not there yet?” ask “How can I grow at my own pace?”

You’re doing better than you think. You don’t need to rush. Your journey is yours.

Step 3: The 1-Hour Rule for Overwhelm

Burnout often comes from having too much on your plate. So, instead of drowning in to-do lists, use this:

→ Pick 1 hour a day to focus on just ONE thing. No multitasking. No distractions. Just one task that actually matters.When you train your brain to handle things one at a time, everything feels less overwhelming.

You don’t have to “get your life together” overnight. You just have to start.

ᡣ𐭩sᴛᴇᴘ ғɪᴠᴇ: ғɪɴᴅ ᴊᴏʏ ᴀɢᴀɪɴ (ᴇᴠᴇɴ ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ sᴍᴀʟʟᴇsᴛ ᴛʜɪɴɢs)

I know what you’re thinking “ I don’t even remember what joy feels like.” And I get it. When you’re burnt out, everything feels dull, like life lost its color.But you can bring it back. And no, I’m not saying you need to go on some self-discovery journey. Sometimes, it starts with the smallest things listening to a song you used to love, rewatching a movie that made you happy, making a dumb inside joke with a friend, buying yourself a little treat just because , go through ur old photos, remember ur high grades or whatever makes u joyful and full of love

Joy isn’t always some big Sometimes it’s just a tiny moment that reminds you life isn’t all stress and exhaustion.And the more you find those small moments, the more you start to feel alive again.

ᡣ𐭩 ʟᴀsᴛ sᴛᴇᴘ : ʏᴏᴜ’ʀᴇ ɢᴏɴɴᴀ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ɪᴛ, ɪ sᴡᴇᴀʀ

If you’re reading this and thinking, “Damn, I don’t even know where to start,” that’s okay. Just start small. Start with one thing whether it’s being kinder to yourself, taking an actual rest day, stepping away from social media, or just reminding yourself that burnout does not define you.Because you will get through this. You’re stronger than you think. And one day, you’re gonna look back at this version of yourself and be so damn proud that you kept going.

Until then? Take it one step at a time or even an hour at the time be gentle with yourself pookie and remember: you are not alone in this.

@bloomzone

[babyjinsu]

[r/situationships] i don't know where i stand with this girl.

PAIRING ⟢ sohee lee x fem!reader

GENRE ⟢ reddit au, social media au, friends(?) to lovers, fluff, crack, written

SYNOPSIS ⟢ a confused boy wants to know if it is still 'just friends' if you do non-friends things with a supposedly "only friend" on r/situationships.

FEATURING ⟢ wonbin, seunghan, & anton of riize and yuna of itzy

CHAPTERS ⟢002 003

💭 one of my favourite trope :( clueless boy.. i can't think of any other member besides sohee for this!! my ddori.. <3 pls enjoy n lmk ur thoughts! xoxo

[r/situationships] i don't know where i stand with this girl. posted by u/ddori • 7h ago

hey everyone. this will sound kinda embarrassing but i (21M), hv been talking to this girl (21F) from my finance class for a while now (like 4 months..?), and honestly, i hv nooo idea what we are. i know for sure we're definitely more than friends, at least to me, thats how it feels like.

we met through a mutual friend, and from there we kinda just go with the flow. we hold hands sometimes, she lets me stay over her place (just sleeping, nothing else, but on the same bed or couch), and she invites me to go places with her-- sometimes doing nothing at all, we just spend a lot of time together. ive nvr had this kind of closeness with someone of the opposite gender and still are just friends... we've nvr had a real convo abt what we're doing (to each other).

as far as i know, and from her friends, shes not seeing anyone else, or treats anyone the way she does to me. and im definitely not seeing anyone either. (i want her so bad)

its messing with my head because i really really like this girl. i want to believe that she likes me too, with how shes treating me but i dont know if she just sees me as a really close friend, or if shes waiting for me to make a move. i dont think shes playing with my feelings or whatnot. hopefully.

ive heard plenty of things about this phenomenon called "situationship" and by the looks (and sound) of it, ITS HORRIBLE. this girl is really nice and the people she surround herself with are really amazing, and ik that they always call their friends out on mistakes. so i'm pretty sure she's not that type of girl.

but still, is this what they call a situationship? is this how it feels like to be in one? is it called so because youre in a situation?? i feel so stuck and i dont know where i stand in her life. what do i do?

Top Comments:

[u/financiallybroke] bro if you're confused, you're in a situationship. it's plain and simple. sounds like she enjoys your company with how she includes you in her daily life but without a real conversation, you're just guessing where you stand in each others' lives.

[u/ddori OP replying to u/financiallybroke] damn,, i don't like the whole idea or concept of situationship :/ it's ridiculous n just cruel tbh?

[u/illfated] there are two takes on this. either youre in a situationship, or shes waiting for you to bring it up. if she wanted you to be her boyfriend, she would either say it or drop hints. itll be better for you to ask IMO. stop wasting time op!

[u/mahjongpro99] been there n got my heart broken. learned it the hard way that if they wanted to make it official, you'll know. moreover, you guys have mutual friends, they'd AT LEAST know if she's into you.

[u/ddori OP replying to u/mahjongpro99] hhh one time they teased and asked if we we're dating, and neither she or i denied. we just laughed along, and she even joked and asked if i want to-- to which i just replied with another laugh because surely shes just joking?

[u/honeymaiden] i was in her shoes and i kept waiting and waiting, and hoping he'd say something or even asked about us. i wanted the guy to confess first, actually telling me that he likes me instead of flirting like we were doing, but he never did so we stayed in limbo until things died down. don't let that happen to either of you, just be honest op. she might like u too, and if not, at least yk better.

[u/L_user] my 'ex' treated me exactly like this. we even did IT, celebrated valentines and dinner dates, did everything like couples did, but when i finally brought it up, she hit me with "oh, i thought we're just really close friends!" like the fuck lmfao. if you dont want to end up feeling like a clown, or embarrass yourself any further, ask her before you get even more attached.

[u/cgpa40 replying to u/L_user] second this. don't invest too much time and effort without knowing ur returns. u deserve clarity op.

[u/ddori OP replying to u/cgpa40] thanks guys. ill try bringing it up when i see her. sorry that happened to u though!

[u/tapiocapearl] hi OP. i'm a girl and this sounds like something girls do when they have a crush on someone, but is too scared to make the first actual move (besides including you in her activities). sometimes we need reassurance, like a proper green light that you like LIKE us.

[u/ddori OP replying to u/tapiocapearl] thanks! feels nice to read another comment from another girl. will be meeting her soon so ill try asking.

[u/tapiocapearl replying to u/ddori OP] yeah! show her you want her seriously as a romantic partner, relationship wise and she'll probably meet you halfway. best of luck, lmk if i got it right or not!

💭 just realised (as i was doing the final proofread) that the comments section is longer than the story itself smiley faceee...

[hikakuriyyu]

poison. (Mickey Altieri smut)

⁎ warnings: toxic relationship, arguing, smoking, kissing, cussing, !smut! (p in v, unprotected, no aftercare or foreplay) female!reader. not proof read.

⁎ summary: you hated your life. you were in college, lonely and depressed. until you met Mickey, your current boyfriend. he made you feel loved. seen. but there was a problem: he was toxic. and you loved it...

⁎ author note: heyy. i know i said i didn't write smut, i wanted to experiment with stuff. so here u go, smut lol...

You were drowning. College wasn't helping, and loneliness clung to you. Your only escapes were drugs, cigarettes, and him. Mickey.

You met him on campus one late evening, leaning on a brick wall, cigarette hanging from his lips as he lazily asked where you were headed. It was casual. Innocent. But from that moment, he had you wrapped around his finger. He became your muse, your obsession.

Then came the fights. The shouting. The slammed doors and broken glass. The cycle... It never got better, but you didn't want it to. You loved the way he always came back, fists against your door, voice filled with desperation. The way his hands trembled when he touched you after. The way he'd drop to his knees, eyes glossy with regret and possession, begging for forgiveness.

And you forgave him. Everytime.

〰・♡・〰〰・♡・〰〰・♡・〰〰・♡・〰〰・♡・〰

A cigarette dangled between your fingers, smoke curling toward the ceiling of your empty dorm. You were lucky. You'd managed to score a room all to yourself, not having to deal with a burden of a roommate.

Your phone buzzed on the nightstand, the screen lighting up: Mickey <3, the caller ID said. This was the 11th call of the night. You didn't answer. You just watched it ring, controlling yourself to not give into his desperation.

His voice still echoed in your ears from earlier. The sharp words, the venom laced in every breath. The argument had been bad. Even worse than usual. You could still feel the heat of it, the way his eyes had darkened, the way his grip on your hand had tightened a little too much...

☆FLASHBACK☆

''Oh so now you care ?'' Mickey's voice was sharp, his eyes wild with something between anger and desperation. He stood in your dorm room, pacing like a caged animal, running a hand through his messy hair. You scoffed, arms crossed, a cigarette burning between your fingers. "Don't start with this jealous boyfriend act again, Mickey. It's exhausting..."

''Jealous ?'' he laughed, but there was no humor in it. "Yeah, maybe I am. Maybe I'm fucking sick of you acting like I don't exist when we’re not in bed or when you're not using me to feel something."

Your jaw tightened. "Oh, fuck you. You're the one who disappears for days, then comes back like I should be waiting for you !"

He stepped closer, towering over you, voice dropping to something almost soft, but laced with anger. "Yeah ? And what do you do when I'm gone, huh ? Who the fuck were you with last night ?" he said. This again... Your eyes narrowed. "I was alone, Mickey." you told him. Which was the truth, but he wouldn't believe it.

"Bullshit." his hand slammed against the wall beside your head, making you flinch. "You ignore my calls all night, come back smelling like a fucking bar, and expect me to believe you just had a little me time ?"

"Oh, so now I need your permission to breathe? Well Mickey, you're the one who fucks off whenever it's convenient. Don't act like you're some loyal saint." You sneered at him.

His hands curled into fists, trembling with restraint. "I'd never fucking cheat on you." his voice was low, dangerous. "But you ? You're so fucking detached, it wouldn't surprise me if you already fucked someone else."

That one stung. Your blood boiled, and before you could think, you were shoving him back. "Fuck you, Mickey. Get out."

His nostrils flared, chest rising and falling with heavy breaths. For a moment, you thought he might leave. But then his expression changed, dark eyes softening, lips parting, regret settling in.

"Baby… I didn't mean that." he murmured as he walked closer to you.

But you turned away, refusing to look at him. And just like that, you heard the front door close...

☆BACK TO PRESENT☆

You stared at your phone as it continued ringing. It then stopped.

*ding* ''Open the door.'' the message said. You knew Mickey wasn't gonna give up. It took him 2 hours to ''recover'' from that argument. You sighed before putting out the cigarette.

Dragging yourself up, you walked to the front door and unlocking it. The second you did, Mickey shoved his way inside, slamming it shut behind him. His eyes were bloodshot, his hair a mess, his breathing ragged like he ran here.

"You're useless." he snapped, jaw clenched.

"And you're a fucking psycho." you shot back, walking towards him.

His lips twitched, something between a smirk and a snarl. He grabbed your wrist, pulling you closer. "You love it."

You did. You hated him. You loved him. It didn't fucking matter.

You crashed into each other, lips colliding in something desperate, messy. His hands tangled in your hair, yours clawing at his jacket, pulling, needing. Teeth clashed, nails scratched, breathing ragged between kisses that felt like drowning.

〰・♡・〰〰・♡・〰〰・♡・〰〰・♡・〰〰・♡・〰

Without further warning, he grabbed your wrists and pinned them above your head, his body pressing against you. You could feel the heat from his skin and the hardness of his arousal through his thin clothing. His mouth found yours in a brutal kiss, forcing his tongue between your lips and claiming your mouth as his own. You could taste the alcohol on his breath, the fire igniting a spark within you.

He pushed you towards the wall, his hands roaming freely over youre body as he unbuckled his pants. You waited there impatiently, watching as he freed his erection from his boxers. His dick was now fully visible, thick and throbbing.

Mickey turned you around before he entered inside you without any prep. He only cared about his pleasure right now, only seeking you to relieve his stress. But that didnt matter at the moment. You moaned as you felt him stretch you out... ''Fuck...'' you heard him groan.

He then started pounding inside you, not planning to stop anytime soon. His hand wrapped around your throat, not tight enough to cut off air, just enough to remind you who was in control.

''You're such a fucking bitch...'' he hissed, his other hand slipping between your thighs, fingers ruthless against your clit. ''And you're a cheater...'' you snapped back before letting out another moan.

His hips stuttered for a second. Just a second. Because you both knew it was true. But he didn't stop. Couldn't stop. This was how you punished each other, how you forgave each other, all in the same breathless, broken cycle. His hand clamped over your mouth, silencing your hurtful words. His hips snapped forward with reckless abandon. You moaned against his palm, the sound muffled but desperate, your climax hitting you like a freight train. Sharp, all-consuming, leaving you breathless and trembling.

The way your body clenched around him dragged him over the edge, a guttural curse spilling from his lips as he came, hips jerking, breath hot against your temple.

For a moment, there was silence. Just the sound of your ragged breaths. Then he pulled out, standing up without a word, and you knew it wouldn't be long before he walked out that door again. You felt amazing and disgusting at the same time.

''Do you think it's always gonna be like this ?'' he asked you as he fixed his clothes. You let out a sigh as you thought about it. Was it really going to be like this ? Argue, hate, forgive, repeat. ''Who knows...'' you murmur as you softly sat down on the couch. You still loved him to death. Nothing was going to make you leave him.

Then, his phone dinged on the coffee table: Message from Sid💕: is she gone ?

The End.

[realtapiocafan]

hello i have new Theories about the GQ bowl night sequence of events lol. so! we've got the new video that just got released (https://www.tumblr.com/cementcornfield/775321154729771008) and then i was re-reading the article that came out originally (https://www.gq.com/gallery/gq-bowl-bode-fashion-show-party-report?) and i actually think the phone calls/heart eyes moments happened BEFORE the show. like if we take for granted the fact that the video seems to be in chronological order? and the article says that joe "couldn't resist a little healthy ribbing with his favorite target, who was just moments from making his modeling debut". SO i'm thinking maybe joe sits down first. then goes backstage to wish ja'marr luck <3 <3 <3 then calls someone about where they are? and goes to sit with them? maybe?? would love your thoughts!!

Hi Carmen! We all assumed that the pictures were taken AFTER the runway (mostly because the pictures were released right after the runway lol), but the video (which i do need to add my thoughts to) does seem to imply that it was taken before - and wow. talk about plot twist!

It does make sense though! Joe and Ja'Marr weren't pictured at the green carpet together. Joe was with the CEO of Raising Canes (???) and Ja'Marr was with Kyle (also ???). But anyways, the pictures do indicate that they didn't arrive together, so Ja'Marr probably did slip away after the carpet, and spend a few minutes with Joe before his runway debut (which is when all of the heart eyes photos were taken and Joe did his teasing).

There are still questions that we need answering though! Joe was sitting next to Dixie so unless he has Dixie D'Amelio's number, we still don't actually know who Joe was calling (the one where he's holding his phone with his right hand while Ja'Marr was hugging that other dude)...

Also the first video (Joe calling with his left hand), is still very much a mystery. Judging on the smile, it's definitely someone Joe knows well. It could've been before the event (to call Ja'Marr and say "I'm here, where tf r u"). It could've also been after the event. Joe was in the verizon event with Justin later so maybe it was either to justin (“i'm coming”) or to ja'marr (“i have to go” “aww joe, stay” “i promised justin that i would be there” “fineeee”). It could also neither of them (as now we don't know that Joe and Ja'Marr met afterwards) but like. Where's the fun in that?

[jd-loves-fiction]

Hi!

could you write something about karasu? as we know he sees himself as mediocre so could u do like him feeling somewhat insecure and reader comforting him like established relationship.

feel free to ignore!

Thanks💗

🌑Thank youuuu so much for requesting my man Karasu 😭i wanted to write him so bad but i had no ideas for so long :( Also there are no Blue lock requests in my inbox where are you guys 🥺

[09:45] There are moments in Tabito’s life where his way of thinking catches up to him. What he once thought of as a sly way to brush off his insecurities comes back to bite him and drag him down to a pit of horrendous self-doubt, an awful, gloomy cloud forming over his head and refusing to leave.

Mediocre. That's all he is – he reasons with himself – all he’ll ever be. And normally that’d be fine, just not today.

“Good morning, baby.” You greet him fondly as you step into the kitchen where he stands motionless, unaware of the storm brewing inside him. You wrap your arms around his middle and happily nuzzle against his strong back.

“Mornin’,” He answers half-heartedly, placing a light hand over yours, mind still miles away. Why do you like him? Do you even like him? Why do you tolerate him when you can do so much better? He’s just mediocre and you’re so much more than that.

The awful little monster at the back of his mind keeps whispering ugly truth to him as his frown deepens. Now you know something isn't right.

“Tabito?” His hand flinches over yours, your gentle voice cutting through the fog of his insecurities for a moment, “Are you alright?”

He shakes his head before sighing, fingers running across your skin in a self-soothing motion as he thinks, “Just… feeling a little strange.”

“Strange? Are you sick? Was it the yakisoba? I knew I should’ve added les–” He cuts you off, taking your hands and turning around to face you with an oddly serious expression.

He struggles with himself for a moment, looking for the words and finding none that fit, “I’m just… Have ya ever thought there was something I could do better?” In his mind it's perfectly subtle, prying while hiding the worst of his insecurities. It’s perfect, for anyone but you, of course.

You can't help making a face, before the realization hits you. You know him too well to not get it, “Tabito…”

“Ya know what? Forget I said anythin’” He tries to appear relaxed and suddenly uninterested, attempting to step around to go sulk somewhere alone. You don't let him – gripping the fabric of hoodie and pulling him close before he can escape.

“‘m serious, baby. It's fine.”

“It’s not fine! If you’re feeling some type of you just tell me and I'll do what I can to help you. Because I love you and I want to help you but… I can't if you hide it from me.” He flushes a lovely red under your attention, squirming slightly under your grip. Clearly the direct approach isn't working. Time to change tactics.

With a long-suffering sign, you move your hands to both his cheeks, holding them so they get smushed, “Is my big, strong, clever, funny, kind boyfriend feeling insecure?” you coo, hoping a jokey tone will help get him to open up.

Tabito clicks his tongue while looking off to the side, before nodding faintly. “Ah, I see. Well, let me tell you this,” you bring him close to your face, so close you can feel his breath on the tip of your nose, looking deeply into his eyes with all the honesty in your bones, “I love you and I think you’re incredible. Beyond that even. I know that this is something that you have to believe in yourself but hopefully my words mean something to you because they are absolutely true and absolutely correct.”

He scoffs at that, cheeks warm beneath your hands and darker than they had been as he thinks over what you’ve said so effortlessly. You’ve never once thought of him as somehow inferior and he thinks you can do no wrong so, is it so hard to believe that he is that much more than mediocre?

You kiss him square on the lips to seal the deal, “You have to say ‘I love you’ back though.”

“I love you too, baby.”

[teacolouredink]

Drawing some lalaloopsy cuties today after wanting to for a while :D I wanted to keep their noodle looking arms like when I draw betty spaghettys 🩷 Hopefully after I draw enough of them it can manifest me finding mine from my childhood lol SHES IN MY ROOM SOMEWHERE I KNOW IT anw the food ones are some of my favourites 🩷🩷 I have loads and loads of designs saved to draw eventually :D The beach one and the umbrella one.. they SPEAK TO ME I LOVE THEM

[woozi]

WOOZI on SEVENTEEN winning Artist Of The Year in MAMA 2024

[lizandrlo]

u can't promise that! and u don't know what it's like! I'm invulnerable! nothing has ever hurt me physically. at most I've gotten tired but I've never except for like five occasions felt any kind of pain. then I have to watch everyone else around me go through this awful thing that I don't and it just reminds me how I never fit in anywhere bc I'm too kandorian for the superfam and I'm too tammaranean for Kandor and I'm too Earthy for Tammaran and no matter where I go, I'm always an outsider. and then I have to watch the people I love, some of the strongest fucking fighters to ever exist, still fall to this shit that i never will. I've seen Soro, the badass metahuman with a white lantern ring, get knocked out. I've seen Spencer, the speedster with leftover predator powers, break an arm. I've seen Xavie'r, a battle hardened tammaranean with guns and all, get bloody impaled! and ur a lot squishier than them. I don't know what I'd do with myself if u got hurt. I pressume I would violently slaughter whoever did that to u but other than that I don't know and I don't want to know. ur supposed to be safe. I need u to be safe, moonbeam.

okay so who was going to tell me that @tdrakeofficial fights people??? hmm??? this is just irresponsible!

[inkskinned]

crows use tools and like to slide down snowy hills. today we saw a goose with a hurt foot who was kept safe by his flock - before taking off, they waited for him to catch up. there are colors only butterflies see. reindeer are matriarchical. cows have best friends and 4 stomachs and like jazz music. i watched a video recently of an octopus making himself a door out of a coconut shell.

i am a little soft, okay. but sometimes i can't talk either. the world is like fractal light to me, and passes through my skin in tendrils. i feel certain small things like a catapult; i skirt around the big things and somehow arrive in crisis without ever realizing i'm in pain.

in 5th grade we read The Curious Incident of the Dog In The Night-time, which is about a young autistic boy. it is how they introduced us to empathy about neurotypes, which was well-timed: around 10 years old was when i started having my life fully ruined by symptoms. people started noticing.

i wonder if birds can tell if another bird is odd. like the phrase odd duck. i have to believe that all odd ducks are still very much loved by the other normal ducks. i have to believe that, or i will cry.

i remember my 5th grade teacher holding the curious incident up, dazzled by the language written by someone who is neurotypical. my teacher said: "sometimes i want to cut open their mind to know exactly how autistics are thinking. it's just so different! they must see the world so strangely!" later, at 22, in my education classes, we were taught to say a person with autism or a person on the spectrum or neurodivergent. i actually personally kind of like person-first language - it implies the other person is trying to protect me from myself. i know they had to teach themselves that pattern of speech, is all, and it shows they're at least trying. and i was a person first, even if i wasn't good at it.

plants learn information. they must encode data somehow, but where would they store it? when you cut open a sapling, you cannot find the how they think - if they "think" at all. they learn, but do not think. i want to paint that process - i think it would be mostly purple and blue.

the book was not about me, it was about a young boy. his life was patterned into a different set of categories. he did not cry about the tag on his shirt. i remember reading it and saying to myself: i am wrong, and broken, but it isn't in this way. something else is wrong with me instead. later, in that same person-first education class, my teacher would bring up the curious incident and mention that it is now widely panned as being inaccurate and stereotypical. she frowned and said we might not know how a person with autism thinks, but it is unlikely to be expressed in that way. this book was written with the best intentions by a special-ed teacher, but there's some debate as to if somebody who was on the spectrum would be even able to write something like this.

we might not understand it, but crows and ravens have developed their own language. this is also true of whales, dolphins, and many other species. i do not know how a crow thinks, but we do know they can problem solve. (is "thinking" equal to "problem solving"? or is "thinking" data processing? data management?) i do not know how my dog thinks, either, but we "talk" all the same - i know what he is asking for, even if he only asks once.

i am not a dolphin or reindeer or a dog in the nighttime, but i am an odd duck. in the ugly duckling, she grows up and comes home and is beautiful and finds her soulmate. all that ugliness she experienced lives in downy feathers inside of her, staining everything a muted grey. she is beautiful eventually, though, so she is loved. they do not want to cut her open to see how she thinks.

a while ago i got into an argument with a classmate about that weird sia music video about autism. my classmate said she thought it was good to raise awareness. i told her they should have just hired someone else to do it. she said it's not fair to an autistic person to expect them to be able to handle that kind of a thing.

today i saw a goose, and he was limping. i want to be loved like a flock loves a wounded creature: the phrase taken under a wing. which is to say i have always known i am not normal. desperate, mewling - i want to be loved beyond words.

loved beyond thinking.

[mammoth-clangen]

It makes me so happy to see how passionate you are about paleo!! That kind of dedication is so lovely to engage with

Oh I'm glad! I worry I'm rambling aimlessly so knowing that at least some people are enjoying it is nice to hear c:

For some paleo related fun, here's a huge Eurasian Pleistocene Big Cat sketchdump from 2023 when I was brainstorming for White Cat, Gold Plains

I still like a lot of these, though I was obviously trying to lean more into realism than I do in Kindred Also they're not Fleet Fangs, they're a different species within the same genera, Homotherium latidens and Panthera (leo) spelaea

Past me was some kind of madlad trying to put spots on things, no wonder the comic died after 10 pages c':

[seiwas]

sellllllll it's meeeeee. hehehehehehehehehhehe

so for ur writing exercises.... deku + light? please? pretty please?

:3c

heheh heheh hehe niku. this will be the death of me. me writing izuku for the first time 🥲 i will only do this for you </3

contains: established relationship, spoilers for the end of the manga, aged up deku but sometime in between the final outcome (he doesn't get the h*** s*** from bakugo yet), mentions of sex and scars

deku + light

izuku only sleeps with the lights off.

it isn't uncommon; many people you know can't sleep with even just a sliver of light turned on somewhere in the room. but the difference with izuku, you learn, is not that he's unable to stand the light―it's that he refuses to.

you quickly pick up on it the first few times he sleeps over.

he fidgets in bed, pretty badly, actually. the nightlight you sleep with glows a warm yellow, illuminating the side of your face and coating him in its afterglow. you chalk it up to nerves, how he pulls at his sleeves and adjusts his position constantly; he is, after all, one of the most anxious people you know.

and this relationship―it's new. heck, even you feel a little jittery with his arm wrapped around you.

the rhythmic tapping on your hip only increases pace. you don't think he realizes it, so your hand gently reaches for his, intertwining your fingers as you turn around in his arms.

he's close, nearly touching you nose-to-nose; the proximity leaves you fuzzy, a little ticklish, so you giggle, a soft "oops," as the freckles dusting his face almost glisten under the warm light.

"hi," you whisper, meeting his eyes; they stare back at you wide in surprise, "can't sleep?"

he looks almost guilty at your question, as if you’ve caught him with the one thing he's been trying to keep from you.

"just—" his voice comes out louder than intended, prompting him to chuckle nervously as he readjusts his volume, "just winding down, sorry."

you inch closer, nuzzling his nose lightly, "it's okay."

"did i wake you?" he asks, cheeks flushing pink as his eyebrows furrow in immediate concern. his expression is something caught between stifling a grin and feeling sorry.

you shake your head against the pillow you share, strands of your hair tangling with his. "just winding down," you tease, watching as his gaze turns softer, eyelids drooping heavier.

sometimes, you think, izuku holds the world in his eyes―a deep, dark green, the color of life. most times, they look at you with wonderment, bright and alive; photos from inko tell you they're the eyes of his inner child.

on nights like this one, however, they hide a depth in them weighted by what you can only assume is time, and all that has happened to him in such a short span of it.

you try your best to understand what lies beneath them, knowing full well he'll never tell you outright what truly bothers him.

"is it the light?" you bring up, some time after laying in silence.

"hm?" he clarifies.

"do you have a hard time sleeping with the nightlight?"

his eyes widen briefly once more, as if shocked that you've caught him again. these split second reactions are ones you've learned to be attentive to when it comes to izuku.

"no," he tries to lie, but you know better as you turn to your nightstand and reach for its switch, "you don't–"

"it was hurting my eyes," you quickly make up an excuse, tucking yourself closer under his chin as you cut off his attempt to deny it again.

finding out that the light was the problem was the easy part—

you'd begun to notice much earlier on that izuku was barely rested on the nights he'd spend at your place. it was only when your old nightlight broke that you began to notice him waking up much later than you did, groggily rousing from a deep sleep.

—what was hard, was figuring out why.

at first, you suspected it was his scars.

"s-sorry, it's not—" he'd warned you, right as your hands gripped the hem of his shirt the first time you were about to have sex, "—it's not nice."

you didn't care though; you still don't care, and you've made that abundantly clear to him since. you love izuku and all his parts―all the nicks and jaggedy pieces of skin that make up who he is.

when you eventually ask him about it, with a request that he be honest with you for once, he tells you that it is and it isn't―the reason why he exclusively sleeps with the lights off, that is.

it's an odd, comforting relationship he has with his body—that he is simultaneously grateful and sorry for how its become a canvas, both painted and marred to symbolize japan’s historic last stand.

you find out the real reason when you catch him staring at his hands.

he does it often, when he thinks you aren't looking—his fists bunched up in the same way he used to watch the power of one for all course through his fingertips; the same way he used to prepare them in battle.

there’s a faraway look in his eyes that lingers, you notice—a little wistful if anything.

“do you miss it?” you finally ask. he gives you the same shocked look he does every time, as if he’s been caught with a secret he’s been trying to hide.

he’s learned a fair bit about you now, too, though—lying to you is futile when you’ve perfected reading his truth. he stares at his fists again as you take a seat beside him, moving to give you space. you rest your head on his shoulder gently, waiting.

“sometimes,” he admits, but you know it’s an understatement.

“i think about the vestiges a lot. i miss them the most, i think,” he continues, clenching his fists tightly, “i always try to reach out to them, but i guess it doesn’t work that way.”

“i… i try to replicate the right conditions every night, but…” then he lets go, stretching his fingers out wide. the scars on the surface ripple through his skin, telling its own story.

you hum, acknowledging what he means. silence sits with the two of you as you take his hand in yours, slowly unfurling his fingers until his palm reveals itself to you. it’s rough to the touch, seasoned with hard work and all that he’s been through.

“is that why you prefer the dark?” you ask softly, after some time.

it's not often that you stay up later than izuku does. when you do though, you catch him shifting in bed, moving from side-to-side. you pretend you aren't awake, but you hear him mumble their names, dwindling in volume as he dozes off to sleep.

he stares at his palm for a moment before he admits quietly, "yeah." his brows furrow as if contemplating whether to say more, but he shakes his head, dark green strands swaying to the beat of his embarrassed chuckle, "nevermind, it's silly."

"it's not."

you intertwine your fingers, sandwiching his hand between yours. a slight sheen glosses over his eyes as he tilts his head up to look at you. he draws in a breath, before it spills over.

"it's..." he finds the words, and you squeeze his hand in comfort, "it's easier to believe it was all real when the lights are out, and that maybe it can happen again."

[aeb-art]

note: the following is three (almost four) years post-game

okay fine i'll just draw comics for my au since writing is so dang hard smh

anyways welcome to two coins! where loop shows up again but siffrin only got the one hat ending

edit: part two

[sukibenders]

I'll never forget when Arcane was airing and Mel fans were pointing out the symbolism between her and Viktor, only for that side of the fandom to be so hateful towards her and her fans like it was bad. But now that their fave is gone and has nothing to do with the Noxus story like Mel does, that side of the fandom wants to talk about the symbolism all of a sudden but, here's the kicker, with only in regards to Viktor. Oh, they aren't even trying.