#AND I'M EXCITED TO MAKE MORE MEMORIES HEHE
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sysig · 1 year ago
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It always seems like such a good idea in the moment (Patreon)
The first four are in reference to a great idea I had of - since I’ve finished my lower-limit page number testing for making books; shorter fics take up less page space, and just increasing the font size isn’t as handsome! - simply making a mini book! All it would take would be to halve the pages again, right? Just cut them right down the middle! Easy peasy!
As I’m sure you can tell by the second, no. Not easy peasy. Difficult painful un-fun >:(
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Obviously I still did it tho! What do you take me for, someone who could have the idea of an even tinier book and then not do something about it?? No It’s also the only one so far to have a paper bookmark rather than a ribbon!
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All told it’s a bit smaller than your average manga (I love the monochrome covers on these under their dust jackets haha <3) - you can see even with effectively doubling up the pages by halving their size, it was still very small-spined!
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A quick shot while it was still being made hehe ♪ It’s Out! Paired here - and the earlier one, just without its dust jacket haha - with my Zarla SC2 collection (ft. Family, Negotiations are Going...Well, and With No Obligation) - I absolutely kicked myself after the fact for not including Out as the run-up to everything, I was really trying to make a full collection in probably-chronological order! Out would’ve been a perfect start! And it only would’ve taken like four pages!!
Ah well, it was still quite a learning experience - I probably wouldn’t make another standalone of under 4k-ish just for formatting reasons but I did get some good ideas of how to do so if I wanted to! Although, my next project is going to be even more of a formatting nightmare........I’ll get there when I get there! Lol
#Doodles#The impulsive thoughts are always the funnest! But then it's all a matter of actually putting them into reality...#Ahh well like I said under the cut it was a learning experience! And I really wanted a physical copy of Out haha ♪#I don't think I've ever mentioned it - not even in my pre-fic notes :0 - but Out was another one of my inspirations for Drinking Game#I mean - the drinking lol obviously but I hadn't considered what VUX drinking would be like before reading it :)#I wanted to pair it with both physical copies hehe ♫ I'm happy I attempted it! And I have a better foundation to build on in the future!#I ended up using the scrap leftover from making such a small cover as the bookmark haha - and I picked the covers so they'd almost-match :)#They go together! But not quite! Just enough!#The sting of creation has worn off - it's actually been a while since I've made a quick book! - so the itch is starting to come back haha#Well - almost lol - the formatting is still........but I do want to do it! Especially now that I've got a hand-in-hand hobby to go with it#All that later ♪ For now snakes!#And also spiders I am also the same when spiders#I've been escorting a lot of spiders outside lately and pretty much all of them fall under the moniker of ''darling'' to me lol#Still no luck on finding a jumping spider :( But I also haven't got an enclosure set up yet either#There's this one booth that always has such adorable and pretty jumping spider enclosures ahhh I might have to break and get one someday#Same place where I got to hold the snake in fact! :D She was a love <3 Beautiful full-grown female cornsnake if memory serves#She was rather wiggly - she was tired and fussy and didn't feel like being handled by a stranger but she was so polite about it#A real delight to handle <3 And I got to see her babies! So cute and tiny!#The rest is more SCII fic stuff haha ♪ Rereading the Pirate fic was a lot of fun :) Intentionally avoiding Vargas fic(s) does make me a bit#Well I really like Vargas still lol it is candy to my brain so any gesture even remotely in that direction is very exciting haha#I'm perfectly happy with the rest for now tho! I have plenty of things to read and make! >:3c#Heck there's still a SCII fic I haven't read yet that I want to!! I just have to get all my previous SCII thoughts out of my head first haha#I will tho >:3c Always always ♪♫#SCII
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subskz · 1 year ago
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…i lost the tag limit war
the reader changing the subject the instant she feels seen by minho is such a subtle but valuable hint that i think says a lot abt the type of person she is, that moment really stood out to me! i know i literally just said this but right down to every minute detail, you've characterized both lino and the reader so masterfully it has to be the most enjoyable aspect of this story for me...and on top of that i just love how you write their conversations so much, they’re both such lil nerds…my intellectually stimulating smarties debating w each other even now 🥰 it all feels so comfortable and natural and draws me into their relationship w such ease!
their discussion abt colors is hands down one of my favorite scenes in all of invisible thread!! it's such an oddly heartwarming conversation and that perfect, out-of-the-box way of thinking that’s just so undeniably minho...it almost reminds me of synesthesia how he describes feelings through color! "the very essence of our humanity" "the orange that paints the sky when the sun is about to dip into the ocean" the way you embodied each colors through emotions/experiences was so wonderfully done, i understood each one instantly like it was a picture being visualized before my eyes. it makes it even more touching that minho and the reader come to understand each other on a whole new level through that way of communicating their moods <3 and for some reason when he gives the example "i feel like that moss green that no one seems to pay attention to" that really tugged at my heartstrings ㅠ it almost feels like he isnt just giving a hypothetical there, like he's giving a small glimpse into his true feelings without saying it outright. maybe he feels invisible deep down, too
them falling asleep together on facetime was so soft and tender ㅠㅠ leave it to lino to ramble abt sous-vide as a bedtime story and complain abt getting SCAMMED lmao the way that is actually smth he would say 😭 "he closes his eyes, thinking that maybe he just found the silence you talked about earlier on" this line got me so good ): it seems at first that he's bringing the reader peace but she's bringing him peace in her own way as well...her feelings abt his eyes changing from fear to longing is such a lovely detail and HER COMPLIMENTING THEM!!! HIS STUNNED REACTION </3 "this is the first genuine compliment he's ever received" oh my god does my moss green theory actually have any merit.....does he really feel invisible to the world too...do not do this to me sahar ㅠㅠ but the way he thinks such lovely, adoring things abt the reader in that moment but instead of voicing them he whines abt being hungry....so endearing and so HIM i cant get enough of how youve written minho here ur singlehandedly reminding me why he is allegedly the love of my life
the kintsugi mention made my heart leap in my chest!!! "when you look at that vase, you know it was once broken, but it doesn't take away from its beauty" please...that sentence in itself is so moving when you apply it to the context of what the reader has been through her whole life, not just a single crack but repeated breakages. and for it to come from someone like minho; it feels like exactly what the reader needs to hear to truly begin to heal herself...he doesn't coddle her but is still so gentle, putting things into perspective like nobody else can w his unique worldview and mental strength ㅠㅠ and i think i just lost my mind realizing that this scene loops right back to the clay comparison you drew at the beginning of the story oh my GOD....the reader is like a clay pot molded by her mother, broken in places and repaired over and over to create smth still damaged but just as valuable...and lino is the gold filling in the cracks....sahar you are INSANE for this one im kissing ur brain and tucking it gently into bed
the scene w minho in the rain 😞 i was not prepared to see my meow meow upset...but i love the way you wrote it so much. how oddly quiet he is, even to the point where he's not commenting in class or teasing her, and that's the key detail that lets the reader know smth's off w him...i also love that nothing in particular caused his low mood. it's such a human quality, and he allows himself to be human and feel his feelings until they pass. "he knew his emotions would regulate themselves" i cant explain why this line stood out to me so much i really love it, i think it's just such a shining example of minho's mindset...not necessarily optimistic, but practical enough to not be completely swamped by the darkness either. it creates such an interesting contrast to the reader's personality to see how they both handle their emotions, w her pushing hers away and him letting them run their course. but the fact that he typically tries to retreat into himself until he feels better, yet strangely enough, he doesn't mind it as much as he'd expect when the reader catches him in a vulnerable state...my babies ㅠ i also really loved the part where he uses her shower and thinks abt the scent of her soap as he washes up, it's so so sweet n intimate i'm such a sucker for things like that ): there are so many small things minho notices abt her like it's the most natural thing in the world, they're both so attentive of one another
"you were both just trying to make it through the day" and "he knew he wasn't invisible. at least not to you" were critical hits to my heart...it feels like a breakthrough in their relationship—the first time the reader truly truly sees minho, all sides of him, and she accepts them all without question <3
the gradual progression of their friendship is so gratifying to read bc of how organically you made it all flow together!! i adore the entire sequence that shows us how they start to care for each other more and more…the casual intimacy of the reader applying her lip tint to his lips (and him not studying for his quiz on purpose 😭💗 come ON) lino worrying abt her eating enough, the reader tying his bangs out of his eyes, complimenting him so matter-of-factly, and him BLUSHING ALL OVER THE PLACE it’s so over for me x2 they are so tender in their actions even when they tease each other nonstop. it all leads up so perfectly to the point in the story where minho finds himself being drawn to her apartment without even realizing it when he doesn't feel well. the subtle shift from him initially trying to shut her out bc he's so used to managing his bad days on his own, to him eventually leaning in to her kindness and seeking her company instead...and the way she just understands what he needs immediately, allows him to sit in silence and simply exist in peace next to her. describing his mood as "too much of every color" really struck a chord w me as well...i'm just so so in love w the running theme of colors you included throughout this story, it's such a brilliant way to put emotions into words <3
the lil parallels here n there from the beginning of their relationship until now are so cute as well; how lino makes breakfast for her the first time and leaves before she wakes up, but this time, he promises to stay and eat with her...to not be invisible ㅠㅠ i think what's making me craziest of all is how they're both so hyperaware of each other's touch. like when their shoulders brushed while sharing the reader's umbrella, how the reader suddenly finds it difficult to concentrate on her book when lino holds her wrist as she shields him from the sunlight...and little does she know it's the exact same for him too, like when she rested her head on his thigh and all he could focus on was the sensation of her hair tickling him 😭 they are so enamored w each other and have become so tangled up in each other little by little...they don't even fully realize it yet but they've made a permanent place in each other's lives now
"you were already on the other side, you realize. his eyes pulled you in and you were stuck in there, swimming in a pool of honey" oh my GOD!!! ㅠㅠㅠㅠ her feelings abt minho's eyes changing from fear, to longing, to at last the comfort of getting to see the other side of those black holes...this line hit me like a truck it might be my favorite from the entire fic ㅠ i have a feeling i'll be saying that abt many more lines to come when you verbalize things in the most poetic ways imaginable heheh but this one truly got me so good, the delicacy in which you describe minho makes the reader's growing affection for him all the more heart-fluttering~
minho hesitating to wipe her tears )): the way he's so careful abt touching her in any unwarranted way bc he can sense that she shies away from skinship is so devastatingly sweet...and then him pinching her right after to make her stop crying NEVERMIND I CANT STAND HIM ACTUALLY. but the way he consoles her is so endearing and so so minho...very simple and sincere, he knows her well enough to immediately figure out the best way to take her mind off of the issue instead of dwelling on it. "you didn't care what shape he was in, you just needed him to be in it" i've already pointed out so many lines oh my god i'm so sorry but each one is like another arrow through my heart ㅠㅠ i feel like this sentence is such a perfect testament to the reader and lino's relationship; they've both seen each other at their best and worst and it doesn't change anything abt their feelings, they care for each other unconditionally 😞 also the reader being afraid of physical touch bc she craves it is SO heartbreaking but so raw...i think it aligns so well w her past bc she's so used to either being invisible, or only being perceived negatively when she is perceived. it makes perfect sense how terrifying she'd find it to bare herself to minho when her whole life she's been deprived of genuine affection...you've really done such a phenomenal job of characterizing both her and lino i cant say it enough!
now...the entire final scene...where do i even begin...i had a feeling the climax of the story was going to hurt but not like this ㅠㅠ the reader's inner turmoil as she debates reaching out to her mother again, that conflicting mix of hating her yet somehow still missing her...it's such an inexplicable and confusing feeling for ppl who have experienced that kind of neglect but so so real and you captured it so candidly. it really added a whole new layer to the reader's humanity, for her to be unable to completely let go of their relationship no matter how painful it is to hold on to...for her to cling to the hope that maybe she could be worth smth to her mother if she did everything right ): i genuinely had the exact same reaction as her when you revealed that her mother had deleted her phone number...it felt precisely like a bucket of ice cold water to the head. the reader trying to pinpoint the exact moment in time where her mother stopped loving her was what really crushed me most...what a heart-wrenching sentence ㅠㅠ the fact that she's tried to hard to find solace in other places and people and tried to grow into her own person after entering university, but even so, those marks left from her childhood are still there...a vase full of cracks 💔 as much as it hurts to read, i love that you included this bump in the road of her healing journey and made a point to highlight that healing isn't linear
and minho 😭😭😭😭😭 the way he handled the reader's outburst is so touching...the way he's immediately able to recognize that her feelings are misplaced and smth much deeper is going on beyond what he sees on the surface...using that astuteness to put his own feelings to the side in the moment is so minho. this entire scene is just blossoming with powerful lines i can't forget, but i was especially affected by the reader saying "i'd need you and i can't afford to need someone else." it's such a tragic summarization of her in my opinion...how she went her whole life being unable to rely on anyone but herself, so the moment she's faced w minho, all her instincts say to reject it no matter how badly she craves that intimacy ㅠㅠ and lino saying "i'll be by your side for as long as you'll have me" is such a beautiful declaration of love...it's so selfless and unconditional, and it fits so seamlessly w how their relationship progressed throughout the story, how they were by each other's sides at their best and worst moments.
"the world doesn't stop because we need it to" "we'll make it stop" and then describing their kiss as like "seeing color for the first time"...i'm going to melt into an inconsolable puddle over all these callbacks to their first date together don't think i didn't catch the ways you weaved those in throughout this final scene..you made it feel so complete, like things have come full circle. i already mentioned how much i loved their conversation abt describing colors to the blind, so for their first kiss to be written that way, like the reader was blind to the true color of the world until she met minho....i am going to be ill that is so intensely romantic sahar ㅠㅠㅠㅠ
"he was the invisible thread stitching your wounds back together." another heartaching line ): what a way to personify the quiet love minho provides...it may be invisible to everyone else, but not to her
i'm so sorry for my horrifically long comment haha but i'm just thrilled i was finally able to read this beautiful fic 😞 just as i'd predicted, you're a phenomenal writer!! the amount of love and effort you poured into it went above and beyond, i hope you're so proud of yourself for creating such a stunning work!! it's very clear to me how every interaction you wrote between minho and the reader was so carefully thought out and so meaningful to the overarching theme of the story, it's all done with care and purpose and there's smth special to be found in each line of dialogue! it's like you carefully stacked more and more on to the foundation of their bond until before we know it, there's an entire home there that they built steadily together. that kind of subtle progression is my absolute favorite thing. i'm also so blown away by how the reader's mother, though never actually making an appearance until the final scene, has such an heavy impact over the narrative. it's like she's a ghost haunting the reader's every action, every decision, every inner thought...i find it so impressive how you were able to incorporate that effect into the story without us even needing to meet the mother! and i must've mentioned countless lines that stuck w me throughout the fic, but just know that there are countless more i could've pointed out as well...you truly write so so beautifully. so poetic and emotive, but also not so flowery that it becomes hard to follow, i'm truly floored by your ability to achieve that perfect balance! on top of the story being so immersive in itself, your writing style made invisible thread such a genuine delight to read <3
this feels like the kind of story i'll be thinking abt for a long time after finishing it, the kind to revisit over n over bc i'm sure there are so many lil easter eggs you included that i may have missed! i'm positive i'll come back to it many times in the future hehe...but i can't wait to read more of your writing as well! ^_^
Invisible thread- one
pairing : minho x reader
genre : university au, academic rivals to lovers (rivals not enemies because they respect each other), slow burn, fluff, angst.
warnings : reader has a very bad relationship with her mother, insecurities, talk about murder but as a joke, mention of alcohol, reader has she/her pronouns.
summary : Your studies were your lifeline for as long as you can remember. What happens when Minho comes into your life and rips it away from you?
word count : 20k
Author's note : I've been working on this fic on and off for the past two months, so if you do enjoy reading, please let me know. asks, comments, reblogs i read them all and they truly make me the happiest <3 (also i based this off my own college experience, where we study two terms and there is one person on top of the class every semester)
part two
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You have always been first in your class.
Not because you particularly enjoyed studying. You simply felt that your worth was solely tied to the marks on your papers.
You never wanted to crumble under the pressure of studies, to hole yourself up in your room for an assignment you won’t remember in a month. But achieving good grades was the only way for you to feel seen; to make someone stop in their tracks and acknowledge you. 
A simple “good job” that you preserved inside your mind, as a reminder that you did exist to other people. Considering that the majority of your life was spent in silence. 
Your mom put a roof above your head and food on your table, but she never asked about your day, nor did she seem to care. You felt as though you were no more important to her than the tapestry hanging on your wall.
At times, you imagined that if you stood close enough to that tapestry, you could merge with it as one. The intricate embroidery would wrap around you and draw you in. And your mother wouldn’t notice. She would regard you with the same indifference she showed towards that textile- a mere decoration, at times a nuisance when she had to dust it.
You always ate your dinner alone. When you scraped your knee, you tended to the wound by yourself. No one attended your childhood musicals, and you patted your back when you cracked an egg without dropping a shell into the bowl. 
You’ve come to learn since your young age that all your milestones, both small and significant, would be celebrated alone. 
On the rare times your mother would acknowledge your presence, she’d unleash a flurry of criticism your way as if she was eagerly awaiting the opportunity to strike you down. She'd toss crude comments over her shoulder as easily as a casual hello, leaving you feeling battered and bruised in her wake. 
You felt as if you were shoreline rocks, and your mother was the ocean. You never knew if she would be like a gentle tide, barely brushing against you, or an enraged storm, mercilessly crashing down on your being. And you weren't sure which one was worse: to be invisible or to be seen and despised.  
That’s why you grew up plagued with self-doubt. You made friends throughout your school years but you never allowed them to get close enough to really see you -you feared that they might glimpse the very thing your mother seemed to despise in you. 
Throughout your childhood, you were like soft clay in your mother's hands- pliable, and easy to mold. And she indented you, everywhere, carved in edges and dips where they should not have been ones. Handled you roughly when you should have been treated with care. And as the years went by, you hardened- much like clay, but her touch remained imprinted upon you. It was difficult at times to discern who you were and who she made you to be.
You tried to start anew when you went away to university; to rewire your brain into believing that you were enough- you exist and you shouldn't prove to anyone that you deserved to be alive. But her words haunted you, they were like skeletons in your closet- but the closet was you. You could never part from them.
So, you fell back into the same pattern of seeking good grades and congratulatory words from your professors. Every A+ you got infused you with a momentary sense of worthiness.
But unlike in high school, you weren't always the best. Your competition came in the form of a single man named Minho, who seemed to excel in every class you shared.
Minho was mostly quiet, but whenever he spoke, you found that his words carried weight. Your professors consistently agreed with his points, and you envied the confidence he exuded. You wondered what it must feel like to be so sure of oneself.
It wasn't until a month into the year that you had your first interaction with Minho. You were in your Constitutional Law class when your professor Kim brought up the notion of ‘Separation of Powers’. You were arguing that judges shouldn’t be included in the writings of law when you heard a scoff from the row behind you. You turned around, raising a brow at the culprit, "Is there something you’d like to say?" you asked.
And in response, Minho smiled lazily, an air of smugness surrounding him, "I just don’t agree." The professor urged him to explain himself, so he leaned back into his chair, eyeing you. "Judges are the ones who practice the law every day, and sometimes they find that none of the written texts fit their case. If they get involved in lawmaking, they can help address those gaps or uncertainties." 
"Who's to say that those judges aren’t biased or politically motivated? They’ll end up writing laws to fit their own preferences," you pointed out, raising an eyebrow at him. "We elect judges to interpret and apply laws, not make them. If they start writing laws too, we'll be violating the separation of powers between the legislative and judicial branches. That's what keeps our entire system from crumbling."
Minho rested his chin on his hand, tapping his cheek thoughtfully with his index finger. "Aren’t legislators prone to biases too? Your point doesn’t stand then," he challenged, tilting his head to the side, "and judges can participate without going overboard. They can provide input on proposed laws without actually drafting them. That way, we ensure that the laws are crafted with a clear understanding of how they'll be put into practice." 
"If your main concern is to ensure that the laws are impartial, we have people who work as consulting experts whose job is exactly that," you flashed him an innocent smile, firing back. "Also, wouldn’t these overstepping branches put the judges in a position to be perceived in a bad light? Is that what you want?"
Before Minho could respond, Mr. Kim intervened, putting an end to your debate, "Let's save this energy for your essays and see who can convince me more."
You gave a quick nod, swiveling in your seat without a backward glance. However, you could sense Minho’s gaze penetrating through your back- as if he was trying to read your most intimate thoughts. 
That was the first thing you noticed about Minho when he walked over to you. His eyes were brown, not a special color by any means. But they held a certain depth to them that seemed to draw you in like a black hole. You weren't sure what you would find on the other side, nor did you have any desire to find out.
He outstretched his hands towards you, stopping you in your tracks. "Minho," he introduced and your hand met his in a firm grip. The second thing you noticed about him was the coldness of his hand, as it wrapped tightly around your palm. 
Suddenly you were taken back to when you built a snowman for the first and last time. You were just seven and the ice was freezing, numbing your fingers as you worked. Your mother never told you that you should’ve worn mittens, or a thick jacket to fight off the cold when she saw you walking out of the house. The memory of your cold hands and the horrible illness that followed still left a bitter taste in your mouth, like an unripe fruit. With a jolt you dropped his hand, forcefully pulling yourself away from that memory. 
"Yn," you said back, and he smiled to himself, repeating your name slowly, each syllable dripping from his tongue.  
"We'll see who'll write the best essay, right?" he asked, clearly challenging you. There was a gleam of excitement in his eyes that reminded you of a child gazing up at cotton candy. 
That was the third thing you noticed about Minho; how expressive his eyes were. They moved with his every word, punctuating them. 
He was infuriating but also amusing. You've never had a clear competitor in your life. Or maybe you had, but you didn't notice them. You were always so reclined on yourself, trying to survive the day, you didn't pay enough attention to your surroundings.
"You want to compete with me?" You asked, and he smirked, leaning against the door, arms crossed in front of his chest. "What? Scared you’d lose?"
"Please." You rolled your eyes at his taunting, "Don’t come crying when I win."
"We’ll see about that!" He shouted after you as you walked ahead, leaving him behind.
This essay was insignificant. A simple way for your professor to assess your knowledge and work approach. And yet, you found yourself staying up all night to complete it. There was no way you were going to let Minho take this one thing from you.
Who were you if not the best in your studies? You were deathly afraid to find out. 
Later on that week, the professor handed you your grade back, 98%. You turned around to show Minho your mark, and so did he. You surpassed him, only by mere percents. "I told you so," you smiled cheekily and he pouted, holding a hand to his heart as if your grade wounded him.
"I'll beat you next time", he mouthed and you chuckled, "Whatever helps you sleep at night."
✹✹✹
The first time you studied with Minho was in a cat café near campus, called Limbo, about two weeks after your initial interaction. You stumbled upon it serendipitously while strolling through your university town. You couldn’t study at home, since you were easily distracted in there, and the eerie silence of libraries often left you unsettled.
Limbo, however, offered the perfect middle-ground: it was calm, not overly crowded, and the buzzing of the coffee machine blended harmoniously with the occasional mewls of cats, which helped you concentrate better. 
You were sitting in a secluded corner table at the café's back, a sleeping black cat comfortably nestled in your lap when you sensed a shadow loom over you. You glanced up quickly to find Minho. He was clad in a grey hoodie sporting a bunny holding up its middle finger. You had to bite your cheek to suppress a grin at his clothing attire.
"What are you doing here?" He asked. 
"You know for someone smart you sure ask stupid questions," you remarked, already looking down at the papers scattered in front of you.
He huffed, taking a seat at the table right next to yours, "I can’t believe that of all places you’ve found this café to study in."
"My apologies, am I disturbing you, your highness?" You asked sarcastically, and in retort, Minho mimicked your words in a high-pitched tone. You threw the pillow right next to you at his head, and Minho swiftly ducked, easily avoiding it. He chuckled loudly while you glared at his laughing figure. That was the end of your conversation that day. 
From that moment forward, it became a routine for the two of you to study at Limbo, every Saturday, without fault. You didn’t explicitly plan on it, but it seemed that both of you found it comforting to work there. And you could also tell that, unlike you, it wasn’t Minho’s first time coming to Limbo. He was friends with the owner, a sweet middle-aged man who offered you pastries whenever you stayed there until closing. The cats seemed to know him too, they mewled at his feet whenever he entered and he always greeted them with a soft smile on his face. 
You didn’t talk much in those unofficial study sessions, the both of you were consumed by your own work. But you’d steal quick glances at him every now and then, the sight of him so concentrated only fueled you to work harder.
Admittedly, your competition left you feeling anxious for days on end at first. Each time Minho came out on top, you’d found yourself losing your grip. Your studies have been the one anchor keeping you afloat your entire life, and now, Minho was ripping it carelessly away from you. So, you resented him- you were human after all.
But then, you realized that Minho’s taunting wasn’t malicious. He wasn’t competing with you to hurt you, he was doing it for amusement only.
You've slowly started to learn that despite his relentless teasing, Minho had a gentle aura surrounding him. Glimpses of which occasionally emerged like rays of sunshine piercing through a thick cloud cover.
True, he chuckled when you accidentally bumped your head on the table while retrieving a fallen pen. Yet, you also noticed how he began to cover the table's corners with his hand whenever you bent down. He swiftly retracted his hand, seemingly believing you didn't notice, but you did.
During class presentations, he deliberately prepared challenging questions for you, urging you to study twice as hard to ensure no stone was left unturned. Yet, whenever the professor praised your performance, Minho offered a subtle thumbs-up as a gesture of support. He winked at you each time he got the right answer and you didn’t. However, when he noticed you struggling with a particular subject, he scooted closer and patiently explained it to you. He got up before you could thank him, swatting his arm in the air as if he didn’t do anything of significance. 
To show your appreciation, you bought him a drink that day he helped you—a simple gesture that sparked an ongoing game of "win a bet, get free food". You bet on who would receive the first mark on an assignment or who would finish an essay first- anything to further deepen the competition between you.
That's how you came to know that he loved puddings, among other things.
Curiously, as the months went by, your mind began to retain these little details about him. How his eyelashes fluttered like butterfly wings when he blinked repeatedly during your conversations. How he glanced at the ceiling when lost in deep thought as if he was waiting for the answers to descend from the sky. Or how his lips take on the shape of an "o" while thinking of his response during one of your many debates. But you supposed that it was natural to take notice of such things when you spend countless Saturday afternoons with the same person.
You were still studying for someone else, in the sense that each time you stayed up working, it was solely to prove your worth to Minho. But at least unlike your mother, Minho's words never haunted you at night.
✹✹✹
Just like that, four months have gone by since you joined your university as a law major. It was nearing finals week and you were preparing it at Limbo. Minho was naturally present too, at his usual table right next to yours.
On the last weekend before the beginning of your finals, you were head-deep into your Criminal Law documents when Minho abruptly got up from his seat and settled in the chair in front of you.
"Yn," he whispers and you glance at him, "What?" 
"I have an idea."
"Keep it to yourself," you grin sarcastically, only for him to pick up your spoon and move it around in a threatening manner.
"Are you trying to scare me with a spoon?" you chuckle in disbelief.
 "Anything can be a weapon if you use enough force."
"Okay… that was creepy. What do you want?"
"The end of the first term is coming up. So, to celebrate our little rivalry-"
"It's not a rivalry if I’m always winning," you cut him off.
"Yeah, that’s why I have a fridge full of pudding."
"But-"
"Anyways, how about the top of the class takes the other out for dinner? A fancy one." He suggests, his gaze fixed on you.
"No, thank you. I already see you enough in classes."
"Didn’t think you wouldn’t up for a bet. Guess I was wrong," he remarks, a cheeky smile drawn on his lips. He knows you couldn’t possibly say no now.  
"Fine," you roll your eyes at his proud expression. "Prepare your wallet." 
"Mm, sure," he responds, before rising from his seat once more.
That day, you both lost track of time as you studied in Limbo until it closed down. When you finally stepped outside, stretching your tired limbs, you were met with the sight of falling snowflakes.
"Nooo, go away. I don't want to watch the first snow with you," Minho whines, referring to the superstition that watching the first snowfall with someone could spark love between the two of you. 
"As if I could ever love you," you laugh at the ridiculous idea, "that’d just be signing a death warrant."
You resume walking towards your apartment when suddenly something freezing and hard hits your back with enough force to make you stagger. Turning around slowly, you find Minho erupting in laughter, his body filled with uncontainable joy. He’s jumping and clapping excitedly, and for a fleeting moment, you can’t decide if your shock was from the impact or from how beautiful happiness looks on him. 
Snapping out of your daze, you swiftly retaliate by scooping up a handful of snow and hurling it at him. "Now you are cold too!" you shout, while he’s still laughing uncontrollably. 
Thus begins an impromptu snowball fight between the two of you. Unsurprisingly, you’re being competitive in this too, trying your best to strike each other before the other could recover. But Minho draws nearer to you, and in your desperation to win, you fall to the ground when he throws a snowball at your chest, gasping as if you’re in pain.
"Shit, did I hurt you?" Minho quickly kneels in front of you, concern evident in his voice. It surprises you for a moment- how worried he seems at the prospect of causing you pain.
But you shake that thought off and push him down to the ground, a proud smile on your face. In his fall, Minho instinctively reaches for you to steady himself, which ends up with you landing on top of him. Your faces are mere inches apart, and a soft gasp escapes your mouth at your sudden proximity.
Minho has a mole on his nose. You’ve never noticed that before. 
You quickly push yourself off of him, not enjoying being this close to somebody. "Why did you drag me down with you?" you grumble, shaking off the snow from your hair.
"Play stupid games, win stupid prizes," he cheekily stuck out his tongue, and you respond with the same childlike gesture before the both of you burst into loud laughter. The sound reverberates through your entire being, and it echoes in your mind long after the two of you go your separate ways.  
As you lay in bed that night, ready to drift off to sleep, a quiet realization dawns on you. This was the first time you've touched snow in since your childhood incident.
That unpleasant memory didn't cross your mind once. Instead, all you thought about was Minho’s infectious laughter, and the surprising warmth it stirred within you.
✹✹✹
You came first in your grade this semester.
True to his words, Minho texted you the name of the restaurant where you’d both meet to celebrate your win. As you got ready for your outing, you couldn’t help the nerves creeping up on you. Studying in silence next to Minho was something, going to a friendly dinner with him was another. You feared it would be too awkward and Minho would regret ever proposing such a thing.
So, as you sit in the refined BBQ restaurant waiting for him, you fidget with your hands, counting down to three in your head in an attempt to steady your breathing.
You were clearly not accustomed to existing with Minho outside of the confines of your studies.
"Did you wait long?" Minho asks as he finally pulls the chair in front of you and you shake your head no.
"Are you nervous?" he chuckles at your lack of words, and you frown, suddenly feeling defensive. "Why would I be nervous? This isn't a date."
"Who said anything about a date?" he smirks and you grab your fork threateningly, pointing it at him, "Don't say anything stupid or I will walk out."
"And stand me up on our first date? That's too mean.” He pouts, a hand on his heart and you can’t help but giggle at his antics. You were ridiculous for being nervous. This was Minho, the one person you’ve talked to the most since the start of this year. 
"What will you have?" he asks and you smile mischievously.
 "Most expensive thing on the menu."
"So you are only here for the food." 
"Well, it's certainly not for your company," you wink and he chuckles, his bunny teeth on full display. 
"And here I thought we were going to be civil with each other."
"When are we ever not?" you gasp dramatically and Minho swats your hand with the menu. "Just order whatever," you finally answer," I trust your food judgment."
"I could poison you, you know?" He smiles proudly and you roll your eyes at him, "Can’t you be normal, for once?"
Minho calls over the waiter and places your orders. The food is quick to arrive and Minho starts to grill up the meat, while you cut the Kimchi into smaller pieces. 
"Here," he puts the perfectly cooked rib onto your plate first and you smile at him, "Thank you."
"Eat up, don’t wait for me," he tells you and you nod, tasting the flavorful meat.
"Wow this is really good," you compliment and he smirks proudly at your words, "I know."
Minho places four other ribs for you, without eating one himself. You start to feel bad, so you grab his chopsticks, pick up the meat, and move it toward his mouth, "Open up."
"What?" He asks confused and you wave the food in front of his face, "Come on, you haven’t eaten anything."
Minho parts his lips slowly, and you feed the tender meat to him, before eating one yourself. You notice how his cheeks are slightly tinted pink now, and you account it to the intense heat of the grill.
"Oh, let's not talk about studies, my brain can't take another debate with you," you tell Minho in between bites and he grins at you, a gleam of excitement in his eyes. "If you were to dispose of a body, how would you do it?"
"I think our next celebration will be in an asylum." you smile too sweetly at him and he stares at you pointedly, "Please, I know you've already thought about it."
"Fine. Probably in a deserted land. What about you?"
"I'd cut their bodies and then bury each part in a different forest. In a different city."
His answer came too quickly, and you pause in your tracks, "Should I be worried?"
"You are too cute to kill." His tone is sarcastic and you make a show of gushing at his compliment, clasping both of your hands in front of your heart, "Growing soft on me, Minho?" 
"Yeah, I’m basically sooo in love with you," he replies with a smirk and you roll your eyes at him, an amused smile tugging at the corners of your mouth.
"What's your favorite color?" you finally ask, changing the subject.
"Purple."
"I'll keep that in mind."
"You'll buy me purple flowers?" He coos at you and you shake your head as you grab the utensil from his hand, to grill the meat your turn. 
"No. I'll paint your tombstone purple," you grin and he laughs loudly, eyes squinted close, and you can't find it in you to care that the people next to you are staring. 
"What's yours?" he asks when he calms down and you shrug, "Navy blue, I think."
"You do remind me of navy blue."
"And why is that?"
"When you look at it, at first glance, it looks like black. But the more you stare at it, the more layers you uncover. Just like you. There’s more to you than what meets the eye."
You grab your glass of water, gulping it down to hide the way your eyes just glossed over. You suddenly felt bare in front of Minho. How did he know?
You clear your throat, racking your brain for a way to move on from that question. "If you were to describe colors to a blind person, how would you do it?"
"Mm," he looks up at the ceiling as he mulls over your question, "I’d say that yellow is the feeling of eating ice cream on a sunny day, in an amusement park. Your fingers are sticky but your cheeks ache from how much you smiled that day."
"Yellow is carefree and happy."
"Exact. Now your turn, red."
"I’d say that... Red is the thrill that rushes through your veins when you do something you are passionate about, you know? It’s what makes our blood boil and our heart race. The very essence of our humanity."
Minho smiles softly at your words, seemingly agreeing with your description. "Don’t you think it would be easier if we simply asked, what color are you feeling today, instead of a 'How are you'?" He questions and you tilt your head to the side, "What do you mean?"
"Well, you could say, I feel like that moss green that no one seems to pay attention to. Or, I feel bright yellow as if the world's energy is stored inside me."
"And right now, how do you feel?"
"I feel orange, not the ugly orange." He precises and you chuckle, "the orange that paints the sky when the sun is about to dip into the ocean."
"A bittersweet orange, an ending that instantly strings along a new beginning. And you don't have time to rest."
Minho places his chin on his palm, eyeing you curiously, "Is that what you want? To rest?"
"Yeah." You admit quietly, "Don't you sometimes wish that the world would just stop, for a few seconds? Just like in a song, right before the beat drops. That silence, I wish I could live inside of it."
"I do too."
You both hold each other’s gaze for a while after that. You felt as if he was keeping you captive with his brown eyes, and he was slowly peeling each of your layers, in silence, as you were peeling his. For the first time, you think that you and he are similar, more than on a studies level. There was a part of his soul that understood yours perfectly. And it felt good, to be understood, for once.
"If you lived in this silence, what would you be doing?" he asks, breaking the serene quiet that surrounded you.
"I’d open a café that had books. And there'd be a little space, where people could paint. Or do pottery. And I’d have cats in there too." You reply excitedly, hands moving around in the air, you end up missing the way Minho gazes fondly at you before his smile morphs into a smirk.
"Please tell me you won't be cooking."
"Shut up. What about you?"
"I’d be a dancer."
"You dance?!" you whisper-shout and he frowns at the surprised look on your face. 
"Yeah. Why are you looking at me like this?"
"I just never expected it. Can I-"
"No." he cuts you off immediately and you pout. 
"I didn't even finish."
"I knew what you were going to say."
"Please, I won't make a sound I’d just watch. Pinky promise.” He grabs your now outstretched pinky with the tip of his index and thumb, lowering it down. 
"I’d only grant you this wish when you’re on your deathbed."
"Bold of you to assume you'd still be around."
"Death might be around the corner."
"Stop it."
"Close your door tonight."
"You are deranged."
Minho chuckles at the crestfallen look on your face, "I’ll think about it."
Just like that, three hours of talking have gone by, the conversation flowing easily between the two of you. And when you finally leave the restaurant, Minho grabs you a cab and you wave him off with a smile. You couldn't lie to yourself, you had a really good time with him. You liked to think that Minho was no longer just a rival, but a possible friend.
But now that you were laying in your bed, you couldn’t help but curse Minho in your brain. His repetitive talk about murder made you paranoid, and now every creak in your apartment made you feel as if death was really right around the corner. 
You decide to text him, figuring that if you couldn’t sleep because of him, you could at least disturb him for a bit. 
Yn : I hate you I'm paranoid from your murder talk
Minho : Poor baby
Yn : Is that you at my door?
Suddenly your phone rings, the shrill sound echoing around your apartment. It was a Facetime call from Minho. You panic for a few seconds, before remembering that you just spent your entire night with him. A call can’t be more daunting than a real-life meeting. 
"See, I’m in my home," he tells you as soon as you pick up and you laugh.
"It's pitch black, I can't see."
"Just say you miss my face." You can’t see him but you can clearly hear the proud grin in his voice. 
"What's there to miss?"
"Are you actually scared?" Minho asks gently and you clear your throat, feeling ridiculous all of the sudden. 
"There is a tree right outside my window and it keeps rustling from the wind," you grumble and Minho laughs at you. 
"Trees can't hurt you."
"No shit Sherlock."
"Close your eyes.” He instructs and you frown at his words. 
"Why?"
"I’ll tell you a story."
"Fine.” You close your eyes tentatively. It’s quiet for a few seconds and you feel yourself relax slightly. 
"So, I bought a sous-vide machine and-"
"Is your bedtime story going to be about meat?"
"Yes?” He replies as if it’s an evidence, “Now be quiet." You pretend to zip your mouth and Minho faintly giggles, before resuming his story. "So, I was saying. I bought one and I wanted to experience different kinds of meats. So, I bought a 30-day aged one and a 58-day aged one and I cooked them both."
"What did you use?" you ask quietly. 
"Just garlic, and thyme, I didn't want to overpower the taste of meat. Anyways I cooked them, but I didn't have plastic bags so I had to go out and buy them."
"Mm," you hum in acknowledgment. You could feel your nerves slowly dissipate with Minho's every word. His story might be ridiculous but his honey-coated voice compensated for it, wrapping around you like a protective cocoon. 
"And I found pudding there so I had to buy it."
"Obviously," you whisper. Sleep was knocking on your door, but paradoxically you tried to fight it off. You wanted to hear the rest of Minho’s story. 
"And I went back home and I cooked it, then I plated it nicely with vegetables that I sauteed with butter and garlic. Just mushrooms and potatoes, nothing too fancy. Again, my main focus was the meat. But there wasn't a difference between the two. They tasted the same for me, for some reason. And I didn't like this because the aged one was very expensive. Maybe I was scammed. Honestly, that butcher looked kind of suspicio..."
Your quiet snores make Minho pause in his tracks, and he laughs quietly. You did end up falling asleep. He can't see your face clearly, but he can see its outline and he stares at you for a while. You look peaceful.
He goes to hang up but his finger hovers over the 'end call' button. You aren't talking, but your hums are quiet enough that they fill up the space around him. It calms him down, and he lets his head fall on the pillow, his phone lying beside him.
He closes his eyes, thinking that maybe he just found the silence you talked about earlier on. 
You just made his world stop.
✹✹✹
The second semester had just started and with it the return of frat parties. You were excited at the prospect of going to one with your new friend Mina. You met her in the library when you both went to grab the same book. You quickly apologized but she waved you off, handing you the book with a huge smile on her face. She was bubbly, like a human serotonin boost, and she started gushing about how much she loved the author. You saw her again in the campus cafeteria, and she skipped towards you as if you've both known each other your entire life. That was the start of your friendship.
You walk into the frat house, both your arms encircling each other. The flashing lights of the party blind you for a moment, and it takes you a while to adjust to the loud music bouncing off of the walls. But you like it, it was like a shield from the outside world and its problems. 
You feel yourself letting loose in the crowd, swaying your hips to the music. Mina spins you around and you laugh, dancing with no care in the world. It was just the both of you in that instant. 
Mina spots Jeongin in the crowd, a friend of hers that she had an immense crush on. You couldn’t blame her- he was very attractive; his easy smirk and his blonde tousled hair earned him lots of appreciative looks from the people around him. But when his eyes locked with Mina’s, you found that his face morphed into a beautiful smile, that made his dimples look on full display, as if it was only reserved for her.
“Go get your man!” You shout in her ears, so she’d be able to hear you. 
“What are you talking about?” She yells back, but you could see the nervous smile on her face.
“He likes you! Go talk to him!”
“I don’t want to leave you alone. We came together!” She clasps your hand in hers and you smile touched by her kind spirit.
“I’ll be fine. I’ll go to the kitchen to get some drinks. Go have fun!”
“You are sure?” She asks, her eyes darting between you and Jeongin, who was still looking at her, and her only. 
“Yes! Go!” You say, gently pushing her away. Mina jogs up to Jeongin who greets her with a side hug. He quickly glances at you and you shoot him a thumbs-up, to which he grins. You loved playing Cupid.
With that, you decide to head to the kitchen to grab a drink. You pick a beer from the fridge, double-checking if the can is closed before opening it. 
You lean on the countertop, sipping on your drink while you watch the crowd, humming along each time a song you knew played. You enjoyed watching people dance freely from afar, with no apparent care in the world.
You feel someone stand next to you and you brace yourself, getting ready to tell the person off if they decide to bother you. You didn’t have the energy for mindless flirting. But then, you smell the cologne that has lingered around you for the past term- Minho. You haven't seen him since your dinner. That was a month ago.
"Fancy seeing you here," he greets as he leans on the counter right next to you, his eyes fixated on the mingling bodies.
You turn around to face him, faking an outraged gasp, "Are you following me?"
"Mmm. You look nice", he compliments and you smile cheekily, "I know."
"Won't tell me I look nice too?" he smirks, leaning closer to your face. "Someone didn’t get enough compliments tonight?" You pout, placing a hand on your heart in mock concern.
"I did, but I want to hear it from you. You’re the only sensible person in this room."
"You look nice. Now leave me alone."
"Come on, I know you can do better than that", he jokes and you roll your eyes, muttering “You’re annoying”, under your breath.
Still, you comply, placing your arms on top of the counter and leaning your head on them to get a better look at him. He does the same, smiling, and you both stare at each other for a while after that.
The strobing lights dance on Minho’s face, casting enticing shadows on him. You've always known he was a beautiful man; you've looked into his eyes far too many times in your heated conversations. But this time was different, there was no cheeky smirk on his face nor a furrow in his eyebrows. He was simply looking at you, and it made a pool of warmth huddle in your belly. You feel yourself relax under his gaze, everything around you seemingly melts away.
You weren’t wrong when you thought that his eyes were like a black hole, pulling you in. But this time, you realize that you didn’t mind knowing what was on the other side. On the contrary, you longed for it. 
"I like your eyes right now. They remind me of the night sky. Black, with tiny little stars littered in them," you finally say.
Minho is taken aback by your words, he wasn't expecting you to compliment him, let alone to tell him something so special. He can feel his cheeks burn red at your words, feel his heart hammering in his chest. He's afraid you can hear it too.
He doesn't know what to say, so instead he clears his throat, plastering a smirk on his face, "I heard better." He hasn't. This is the first genuine compliment he's ever gotten.
"Oh, fuck off," you laugh and he joins you. The music was loud and yet the only sound his ear seemed to pick up was your laugh.
"Are you here alone?" He asks, and you shake your head no, "Came with my friend Mina."
"Did she leave you by yourself?" He frowns and you feel yourself warm up at his worried tone. "I told her to go talk to Jeongin."
"Next time, don’t stay alone."
“Fine, Dad.” You chastise and he stares pointedly at you, "I’m serious, yn."
You take another swing of the beer before turning your body fully towards Minho. After a few beats of silence, you finally ask a question that has been on your mind for a while. "Why do you say my name this way?"
"What way?" He questions and you shrug, "Slowly. People used to always rush it but you don’t."
"Well, it’s a pretty name. It deserves to be pronounced as a whole."
You beam at his words; you smile so brightly it makes his heart skip a beat. This is the first time you’ve grinned this widely at him, no hand in front of your mouth as if to hide it. He did notice how you were a reserved person outside of class, as if you were afraid of taking up too much place. But he could tell you were slowly unraveling, growing bolder with each passing month. He wanted to tell you that if people like you spoke more, the world would be a far better place. 
But he couldn't bring himself to say all of this, so he forced those bubbling words down his throat. "I’m hungry," he whines instead and you laugh at his pout. "I'm kind of craving a greasy pizza."
"Should we go buy it? You can tell Mina to come so we can walk her back."
"I’ll ask her."
You shoot Mina a text, asking her where she was and telling her about your plan. She replies that she’s with Jeongin who just offered to take her home, so you could leave without her.
"We can go." You tell him and he nods. Minho shrugs his leather jacket off, gently placing it on your shoulders. His warmth engulfs you and you sink further into it. His arm hovers around your shoulder not touching you as he leads you out of the party. He has never touched your body, you note, it's like he was everywhere and nowhere at once.
You both walk to an open parlor near the frat house, and you order a Margarita pizza to share. You sit down on a nearby bench to eat it- the night breeze too liberating to pass up on.
As you both finish eating, a cat with white and orange stripes all over her body approaches the both of you cautiously, and you pat her head softly. "Aren't you the cutest thing ever?" you coo and Minho chuckles as he scratches the cat’s chin. She purrs at his touch appreciatively, and you smile at the soft look on his face. 
"Never knew you to be this gentle", you giggle and Minho shushes you, "Let's not do this in front of the cat."
"Why are you acting as if we are a divorced couple and she’s our child."
"Easy, yn. You make it sound as if you want me to marry you."
"Now you're just projecting," you chastise and he laughs, eliciting giggles from you. He had a melodic laugh, you noticed, and you always felt a surge of pride whenever you made him close his eyes and tip his head from laughter. You felt as if it's a sight only you can see.
"I have three cats", he says softly and you gasp, "Really? We spent all of our Sundays in a cat café and this is when you tell me?"
"I only tell my friends."
"So we're friends now?" You gush and he rolls his eyes at you, "I take it back."
"What’s their names?" You ask curiously and his eyes soften at your question- you could easily tell he loved them dearly.
"Soongie, Doongie, and Dori. They are rescues."
"That’s very sweet of you Minho."
"Most of my scars come from them though," he chuckles but you sober up at his words, quietly scratching the cat's ears.
"What’s on your mind?" He asks and you glance at him. It was scary how well he’s starting to know you. But it was also nice; to be known is to exist, after all.
"I just... Sometimes I wish that memories would leave physical scars on you. Because at least then, you could treat them, put a band-aid on, and watch them fade away day by day. Because when the scars are emotional, you can’t treat them, you know? And someday someone brings up a name or a place, or you smell a certain scent, and suddenly they reopen as if no time has gone by at all.”
Minho stays silent for a while, mulling over your words. You don't mind, you weren't expecting him to comfort you. You just needed to free those words from the mental prison you've held them in for so long.
"Do you know Kintsugi?" he finally asks and you shake your head no.
"It's a Japanese art. They put back together broken vases with molten gold. It represents strength despite our flaws."
"That sounds nice," you sigh wistfully and he nods. 
"It is. When you look at that vase, you know that it was once broken, but it doesn't take away from its beauty, on the contrary, it adds to it. Scars, whether they are emotional or physical are there for a reason. They remind us of how we pushed through whatever life threw at us."
"Am I supposed to be grateful I survived this?" You chuckle lowly, as your hand scratches the cat’s ear. Your fingers brush against Minho’s and you hesitate for a few seconds before moving them away.
"I wouldn't say grateful for what you went through," he speaks once again, "but grateful to yourself. At the end of the day, the reason why you're still here is you. You put yourself back together," he then bumps his elbow into your side softly, "and hey, even if your scars reopen there will come a time when they wouldn’t anymore. Sometimes, it takes a while to be okay again."
This was Minho’s way of telling you that someday it wouldn’t hurt anymore. That someday you’d be okay. And you needed to hear that. You needed to hear someone else other than yourself tell you that.
"Thank you, Minho, I needed that", you smile at him and he grins back at you before his smile turns to a smirk. "I charge 15 dollars for the hour by the way."
"Oh, come on! You didn't even say something revolutionary." You are lying. Minho's words will echo in your mind long after this night- a beacon of light to hold onto.
"Oh, so now it’s no longer ‘I needed that’. Tsk," he jokes a smirk still plastered on his face.
"Okay, Mr. Therapist. I’ll pay for your coffee tomorrow, sounds good?"
"I should have you as my client more often," he winks and you laugh, head tipped back. You were grateful more than ever for his teasing, loving how it wasn’t awkward between you after your discussion.
"You are a good listener." You tell him as you stand up, dusting your pants.
"I’m good at everything," he grins cheekily at you and you roll your eyes playfully, "And here I thought we were having a moment."
You both start walking side by side toward your home when Minho speaks again. His tone is quiet as if he wasn’t sure he wanted you to hear him. "About earlier, your compliment, I mean. I suppose I didn't thank you. So, thank you," he scratches the tip of his ears and you shrug nonchalantly. "It's the truth. You might get on my ass but that doesn't change the fact you are a pretty man."
He doesn’t respond and you tug at the sleeve of his shirt playfully, "You won't tell me I’m pretty too?"
"But then I’d be lying."
"Asshole."
"Pretty," he replies without missing a beat.
You laugh loudly, hand tightly clutching your stomach and he joins you. There is a newfound lightness in your steps now. Unbeknownst to him, Minho just managed to lift a small weight off your shoulders, allowing you a brief moment of respite.
"This is me," you say when you arrive in front of your apartment block, "Thank you for walking me home."
"Of course. Don't dream of me."
"Idiot," you laugh waving him off and he does the same. "Oh, and text me when you get home safely!" you shout before heading inside.
For the second time this night, Minho is blushing profusely at your words. He sighs to himself, waiting patiently until a light turns on in your place to leave.
✹✹✹
It’s been two months since the start of the new term. You still went to Limbo, every Saturday with Minho- even when you didn’t need to study. 
Sometimes you’d just grab a book and you’d both read, a cat lazily lounging at your feet. You started sitting at the same table too; you figured it was easier since one of you always pays for the other. When you have a bet, but also randomly, when you notice that the other person is feeling down and you want to cheer them up without saying anything.
That's why you bought three bubble teas for Minho in a row. He was quieter these days, you noticed. He didn’t talk to you nor did he retort back in class. It was the first time you’ve seen him this way. As if he was a simple shell of the person he usually is. 
You were walking out of your Communications Strategies class, which Minho weirdly didn’t come to when you realized that it was pouring rain. You smile lightly to yourself, grateful since you thought about picking up an umbrella this morning. 
As you walk through campus, everyone around you running to take shelter, you spot someone sitting on a bench, completely drenched from the rain. Their head is hung low and you frown to yourself. They would surely get a cold if they stay there.
But then the person raises their head and you quickly realize it's Minho. You jog up to him instinctively, standing in front of him and shielding him from the rain with your umbrella.
He looks up at you and you feel your heart clench. His eyes are void of emotion and he stares blankly at you. "Are you okay?" you ask and he blinks at your words, as if his brain hadn't yet registered that you were there.
"Yeah."
"You don't look like it", you tilt your head to the side and he looks down again. You have to strain to hear his next words, muffled by the rain and his mumbling, "I don't want to talk, yn."
You decide to put away your umbrella and sit down next to him on the bench. The rain falls rapidly on both of you, and you feel yourself grow cold from it. 
"What are you doing?" He questions, turning to the side to look at you.
"Enjoying the rain. It is kind of stupid that we have umbrellas, right?"
"You'll catch a cold."
"I mean we always complain about the drought and then when it rains, we hide from it. But it's really beautiful."          
"Stop, I don't want you to get sick."
"Well, neither do I. Let's go eat some soup. My treat."
"Yn, I don’t-"
"I thought you were smart enough to know I won't take no for an answer."
"But I-" you cut him off again. "Also, I’m doing this for me because when you order for two, they give you a lot of side dishes. Now come on."
You stand up and he looks doubtfully at you, before following suit. You open up the umbrella again and hold it over both of your heads. He has to huddle close to you, and your shoulders brush against each other. Once, twice. Not that you're keeping count. But your body is always hyper-aware of Minho’s proximity. You also notice how he silently moves from your right to your left, this way he's the one walking right next to the speeding cars. Your hold on the umbrella tightens. You were still not used to those small attentions of his. 
You arrive in front of your apartment block and he hesitates. "Come up, I won't murder you I promise." You joke and he smiles lightly back at your words. Progress.
He enters your dorm and you can see him eying his surroundings. You know that if it was another time, he would have teased you about something- anything. But he stays quiet, and you find yourself missing the sound of his voice.
"Would you like to shower?" You offer and he nods, "Please."
You lead him to your bathroom and show him where the washing machine is. "Put your clothes in there for a quick wash and dry. You can shower meanwhile."
He nods again as you hand him a towel. "I'll be outside."
You quickly leave the bathroom to place the soup orders, and Minho discards his wet clothes, walking into your shower. The water is piping hot, and he leans his forehead on the cold tiles. He doesn’t move for the first ten minutes, too tired at the prospect of lifting his limbs.
Nothing particular happened. But he’d go through days when he’d quiet down because everything around him was too much. The feel of his clothes against his skin, and the sun streaming through his curtains. But it always passes. Minho was a realistic man and he knew that his emotions would regulate themselves. That’s why he didn’t like appearing vulnerable in front of other people.
But for some reason, he didn’t mind lowering his guard with you. He knew you wouldn’t judge.
He sighs, grabbing your cherry-scented shampoo and pouring it into his hands. He can clearly smell you now. The scent of your hair that always tickles his nose, whenever you are sitting close to him. Your body wash is next and he wonders if this is how your skin smells, like vanilla and jasmine, and something entirely you. 
Forty minutes later, Minho finally steps out of the shower. His clothes are clean and he quickly puts them on. He dries his hair with the towel as he walks out of your bathroom towards the living room. 
He finds you sitting on the ground, in front of a heater that looks close to giving up. He makes a mental note of giving you the one he has since he doesn't really use it. You changed out of your clothes too, and you are now wearing a pair of pajamas with little bunnies sewn into it. The sight almost manages to make him smile. 
"Still cold?" you question when you notice him standing behind you, unmoving, and he shakes his head no.
"Good, the soup is here." You say cheerfully, pointing at the steaming bowls sitting on your table. Minho hums in reply and you stand up, grabbing the towel from his hands to place it on the drying rack.
You come back, a soft green blanket in your hands. You sit on the couch and pat the spot beside you. Minho sits next to you, and you lay the blanket on both of your laps, before handing him his soup.
You start the show you’ve been last watching, as you both eat in silence, your legs crisscrossed. You make some comments throughout the episodes. You figured that it was a safe territory, to talk about something as mundane as this. He didn't reply but you didn't mind. You weren't here to have a conversation with him. You just wanted to distract him.
You realize at that moment that Minho always looked so put together to you. But he had problems of his own too. That much was obvious. It made you feel closer to him, in a sense. You were both just trying to make it through the day.
Two hours later, you get up to grab a book, handing Minho the remote to put on a show of his own. You curl in a ball in the corner, reading where you left off last night.
"Can you... Can you read out loud?" Minho speaks for the first time in a while and you look at him. His eyes are closed, his head resting against your couch.
"Sure."
You start to read, and Minho further sinks into the couch. He feels at home here. Because the blanket is soft and the light is dim enough to not hurt his eyes. Or it could be that he smells like you, a scent so comforting he wants to bury himself in it. Or maybe it's your voice that floats through the air, slowly clouding Minho’s every sense. He feels as if he could see the words you were pronouncing dancing in front of his eyes. You enunciated each syllable clearly, making sure that no sound was forgotten.
As Minho gently drifted to sleep, he felt as if he was part of the words you read out loud. He felt as if you were treating him with the same care, making sure that he knew he wasn't invisible. At least not to you.
When you wake up the next morning, Minho is gone. And his place beside you on the couch is empty. He made you breakfast, scrambled eggs, and freshly pressed orange juice. And right next to it you find a note, "Thank you for reading to me."
✹✹✹
Minho didn't believe in having a lot of friends. He was content with the two people he had, Chan and Changbin. The latter was his high school friend, he skipped a year and ended up being in the same class as Minho. They didn't talk at first until the day Changbin dropped a book on Minho's foot. The brooding man started apologizing profusely, and that was the start of their friendship. They've kept in touch since.
Chan was his roommate at university. It's not that he particularly wanted to befriend him, but Chan was a social butterfly and he quickly managed to pull Minho into his friendly trap. He annoys Minho the most, but in an endearing way. And although Chan is older, Minho still strangely developed a soft spot for him. 
And he supposes he has you too now. At first, you weren’t friends, rivals at most. He enjoyed reeling you up and having you frown at his words in your heated debates. He also liked talking to you, because your ideas were interesting and you always gave him a new fresh perceptive to see things.
That’s how he strictly saw you as, an intelligent human who he liked to debate with.
But then he started to look forward to meeting up with you at Limbo. He no longer minded the fact that you took his self-assigned table, from his high school days. And he laughed more freely with you, enjoying how you always had a witty retort sitting at the tip of your tongue. 
That’s how he started to notice things that friends most definitely notice. How you have a charm bracelet you always fidget with whenever you are nervous. How you stray away from physical touch. How you scratch your eyebrow when you are deep in thought.
But also, how you seem to have an obsession with cherries. Your cherry pendant, your cherry-scented shampoo, and your cherry-tainted lips. A friend would most certainly think that your lips are like red wine-stained glass.
He remembers one of the many times when you were at Limbo, and he saw you reapply your lip tint, or so you called it. You caught him looking and he swiftly averted his gaze, but it wasn't quick enough. Suddenly you were in front of him, a tiny red bottle in hand.
"Let me apply it to you," you smiled and he pushed your head away with his pointer finger. "No."
"Please," you pouted and he couldn't help but find you adorable. You sometimes reminded him of a small kitten. But he didn’t dare to call you by that nickname. 
"Never."
"If I score more than you in our environmental assignment then I will do it."
"Fine." he huffed so that you'd leave him alone.
Minho didn't study for that assignment. He blamed it on a headache, not that it's ever stopped him before. And two weeks later you were in front of him, eyebrows scrunched in concentration. You applied the lip tint gently on his plump lips, carefully tracing over his cupid bow. 
Your face was mere inches away from his and he noticed how you were wearing a gloss today, for change. It was shimmering under the lights and he usually didn't like glittery things, but he couldn't take his eyes off your lips. 
"All done!" you clapped excitedly, snapping him out of his haze. You then shove your phone camera into his face so he'd look at the results.
"You should be a model. Your face is perfectly sculpted," you comment nonchalantly, before sitting back in your seat. 
“I know.” He replies confidently, but his hand kept fiddling with the tip of his now pink ears. He couldn't concentrate for the rest of the night.
You were his friend because he always worried if you were eating enough. That’s why he urged you to grab a bite in the convenience store near Limbo, whenever you finished up your studying late.
This was one of the many times you sat on the minuscule table outside, hot ramen bowls in front of the both of you. Minho huffed in annoyance between each bite, his bangs were getting longer, disturbing him when he leaned down to slurp his noodles. 
“Here,” you stand up from your place, a hair tie in your hands. 
“What are you doing?” He questions as you stand behind him. You don’t reply, silently grabbing his hair and putting it up in a tiny ponytail, this way it wouldn’t get in his eyes anymore.
“Voila,” you sit back down, resuming your eating. Minho was grateful for the dimly lit street because his entire face was burning up. Your fingers in his hair were gentle and he wondered how it would feel if you ran your fingers through it. 
This was something friends think about, right? 
"I’ll cut my hair tomorrow," he clears his throat. He didn't know why he told you. You certainly weren't interested in his hair endeavors.
"What?!" you yell, "Don't. Your hair is beautiful why would you cut it?"
"Because it's getting longer."
"But it suits you."
Minho also noticed how you always threw compliments his way. Not in a flirtatious way, but in a genuine one. He couldn't help but wonder what made you this way. Did you so freely give love to others because you knew how it felt to not receive it?
"I’ll still cut it."
Minho returned home; his hair still clipped back in a ponytail. Chan eyed him weirdly but he shut him off with a glare. The elastic remained at his bedside since.
He didn't cut his hair.
The moment Minho started to consider you a close friend, was when you invited him over to watch your show. You didn’t force him to open up that night, and he appreciated it, more than he let on.
That's how a week later, he finds himself walking towards your dorm again. The thoughts in his head got too much, and Chan was immersed in his makeshift studio, which meant he won't be free for the next four hours, minimum.
He didn't plan on going to you. It was late at night and you were probably asleep, but his feet naturally led him to the direction of your place.
He knocks softly on your door. He wasn't even sure if he wanted you to open. What would you think of him showing up at eleven pm? He should have thought this thro-
"Minho?" you call out, and he startles a bit, his feet already inching away from the door.
"This was a bad idea, I'm sorry," he starts to retract back but you grab the hem of his jacket to stop him. "Do you... Do you want to watch my show with me?" you ask, a soft smile on your face and he nods tentatively.
"Okay, come in," you open the door wider and Minho follows you inside. The look in his eyes reminds you of the day you found him sitting under the rain. You didn't like it, you wanted him to find his spark back, his usual demeanor. He wasn't deserving of anything but happiness.
"I’ve started a new show, this one's a bit more romantic, so don't go around imagining me as the main character," you tease and he scoffs at your words, a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.
He doesn't reply, but you don't mind. There was this secret agreement between the two of you, you would talk and he would listen. He needed the distraction, and you needed the company. Sometimes the line between alone and lonely blurs, and on days like these, Minho’s presence fills the void inside.
You comment on the scenes and Minho hums in reply, you watch three episodes in a row, and your eyes are getting drowsy, so you close them.
"Minho," you call out gently and he turns his head towards you.
"Yeah?"
"What color are you feeling tonight?" You ask, referencing to what he told you on your dinner celebration. That felt like an eternity ago.
"Black." You stay silent and Minho fidgets with his hands before speaking once again. "I feel a lot at the same time, too much of every color. That's why- that's why I said black."
"How can I help you feel yellow?"
"You already do." His admission came softly and it made your breath hitch in your throat. You wanted to open your eyes and look at him, but you figured it will only make him close off even more.
“Okay. Will you stay for breakfast?”, you whisper. You were very sleepy, the soft chatter of the TV and your hushed conversation were like a lullaby to you. 
"You want me to?" he asks, and he sounds so vulnerable you can't find it in you to say anything but the truth.
"I do," you admit, and that's the last thing you remember before sleeping.
Your head falls near Minho’s lap on the couch, your hair tickling his exposed thigh. Minho shouldn’t feel this way, he thinks. He’s sitting on the leather couch and his feet are touching the cold floor and yet all he can feel is three strands of your hair tickling him.
He glances at you, at your now parted lips and your relaxed eyebrows. His hand hovers over your hair, but then he curls it into a tight fist. What is he doing? He thinks to himself as he drags an angry hand through his face. He sighs, before standing up and grabbing the blanket you had on the opposing chair. He gently lays it on your body before sitting next to you once again. 
You told him to stay for breakfast. He’ll stay.
✹✹✹
2 months later
"Yn!" Minho shouts in your ear as he plops down next to you. You startle, dropping the book you were reading. 
"I hate you," you grumble, picking up your book and he smiles cheekily at you, "No you don't."
You were laying on the grass of your campus garden, in between two classes, trying to kill the time. It was April so the weather was perfect for lying under the warm sunrays. You loved spring, it always held within it the promise of a better time. 
"What are you doing?"
"I was reading before you got here and started to annoy me." 
"Don't mind me. Do your thing." 
"And what are you doing?"
"Enjoying the sun."
"You couldn't find any other place to do so?"
"Nope."
"You're annoying" You try to sound mad but the smile on your face betrays you. You started looking forward to any moment Minho randomly shows up throughout your day. Sometimes it's late at night when he's suddenly craving sushi and he drags you with him because if he's not studying then you shouldn't be too. 
Sometimes it's during the day, when he takes you to a new garden where he found the quote "cutest cats in existence". Not as cute as his cats, of course. 
Sometimes it's late afternoon when he just knocks on your door, and he's there with Chan-his roommate who sometimes joins your study sessions- snacks in their hands. You've learned that what Minho doesn't say in words, he compensates by spending time with you. And you didn't tell him but waiting for these moments has been the joy of your life for the past few weeks.
It made you feel excited- like a child waiting up for Christmas morning to discover what gifts they are receiving. 
So, you resume reading, as Minho is lying next to you. You could smell his pinewood cologne and you wished you could pour his essence into a bottle and carry it with you everywhere. 
You notice how the sun is hitting Minho’s eyes directly, and how his eyebrows are scrunched up at the aggression. So, you grab your book with your left hand, and hover your right one over his eyes, shielding him from the sun. Minho's breath tickles your hand and you can feel goosebumps rising through your skin. 
It's as if every physical proximity with Minho made you feel hyperaware of every part of your body, and how he can lighten it with a simple breath from his part. It made you wonder what it would feel to have his hands on your skin.
As if Minho heard your thoughts, he gently wraps his thumb and index finger around your wrist, steadying your hand in place so it wouldn't strain your arm. You suddenly don't know what page you are in, too overwhelmed by the feeling of his hands on you. 
His touch is very featherlight and you are afraid to move, to break the bubble you are suddenly pulled into. 
"Read to me," he tells you and you gulp. You never understood why Minho enjoyed it when you read to him. 
"Like my voice that much?" you tease, in an attempt to hide how affected you are. You were so close to him; it would be easy to slide down and lay your head on his chest. You wondered how his heartbeat would sound. Was it steady, or racing just like your own? 
"Yeah, it's calming," he replies sincerely, catching you off guard. You didn't expect him to compliment you, and now you are racking your brain for a retort, anything to make you breathe again. 
"Growing soft on me Minho?" you say, the same question you asked on your first dinner out. The first time you truly saw him, the first time you felt as if you were two pieces of the same puzzle, just waiting for someone to connect the both of you. 
He doesn't reply. And you sit there, patiently waiting. His first answer came so easily, so naturally, because he was being sarcastic, "I’m basically in love with you", he told you back then. So why can't he say it again?
"Yes, I am." He finally replies and you feel your breath catch in your throat. You try to account it for your brain misguiding you. It wasn't Minho speaking, it was the rustling of the leaves and the singing of the birds that you just heard. But it was him, and now his eyes are open and he's looking at you. Your hand is still shielding his eyes and his fingers are still wrapped around your wrist. And you are suddenly feeling. You are feeling too much. You don't know what to do with those feelings cursing through your veins and you can't face them. Because they are scaring you.
"I'll just... Yeah, I’ll just read," you say quietly, too flustered by his intense gaze. You were already on the other side, you realize. His eyes pulled you in and you were stuck in there, swimming in a pool of honey. 
"Out loud," he says and you chuckle, "Fine, Min." The nickname slips out of your tongue naturally and you quickly snap your head towards Minho to see if he noticed. 
His eyes are closed, and there is a slight smile on his face, and you can swear that he just repeated the nickname to himself softly. 
✹✹✹
You've been so sick these past days, you barely managed to go to class. Your head throbbed with pain and your entire body felt as if someone thoroughly boxed it. 
You were grateful that Minho reeled down his teasing because you had no energy to retort back. He may have noticed how sick you felt and truthfully it would be hard not to. You stayed silent throughout the day, and you looked so pale, you avoided looking at the mirror altogether.
Though Minho didn't talk to you, he still silently placed water bottles and some of your favorite snacks on your desk. You'd down the water, grateful for the relief it brought your sore throat. And when you didn't touch the food, he'd immediately text you 'Eat up', followed by a simple 'Please'. Having someone else care for your well-being felt weird, but it warmed your heart beyond what words could describe. 
You only came today to pass your Criminal Law mid-term, but your head hurt so badly that you weren't even sure what you wrote on your paper. The words blurred in front of your eyes and you almost slept in the middle of your exam, exhaustion threatening to take over your body. 
You fucked up, badly. You haven't screwed up this much in years.
You thought that you were slowly getting better since Minho surpassing you no longer sparked an unworthy feeling within you. But apparently, you were wrong to believe so. Self-doubt crept up within you once again, and the ugly feelings it stirred slowly clawed at your throat, making it hard for you to breathe.
It was one test, and yet it reeled you back ages ago. 
Tears threaten to spill out of your eyes as you hurriedly walk out of your class. You make a beeline for the library, figuring that it will be mostly empty by now. 
You pull out a chair and sit on it, lowering your head down so no one will see you. Your tears are falling rapidly and you hit your thigh repeatedly.  You hated how weak you felt in that instant. 
"Yn?", someone calls out and you curse internally. You don't have to look up to see who it is, Minho's voice has become a part of you- you could easily recognize it between a thousand mingling sounds. 
You don't want him to see you, especially not like this, weak and vulnerable and on the verge of breaking down. So you quickly slip a pair of sunglasses on your eyes, before raising your head to look at him. "Hm?"
"Are you okay?" he asks, his tone so soft it makes you want to cry ten times fold. You hated it, hated how attentive he was to you. You didn't deserve it. 
"Yeah, yeah. I'm just here to pick a book," you lie, abruptly standing up and heading toward the rows behind you. You desperately needed to get away from him. 
You pause in front of a random shelf and then you feel Minho standing behind you. You grab a random book and he peeks above your shoulder to see it, "Economics? You hate this subject."
"Why are you following me?" you turn around attempting your best to sound mad. When in reality, your heart was brimming with hurt. You wished you could get away from your body and seep into someone's soul to feel what it's like to love yourself.
"You aren't okay," he asserts and you hate it. You hate that he sounds so sure of himself. Was it that noticeable? Were you not fooling anyone?
"I am," your voice is shaking but you are adamant about contradicting him. You couldn't let him see you. What if he runs?
"Then..." he steps forward and you take a step back until your back is against the shelf. His left arm cages your body, but his right one stays by his side. He is leaving you an opening, you realize, an outing in case you feel uncomfortable. Against all odds, you don't.
 "Why are you hiding from me?" he asks, gently taking your sunglasses off your face, and placing them on the top of your head.
You don't look up at him, and he hooks his finger underneath your chin, gently raising your head. When your tear-stained eyes meet his, he frowns deeply, "Why are you crying?"
"it's nothing."
"Yn..."
"I fucked up, okay?! That was the worst test I’ve ever given in years." The tears start to flow at your words and you wipe them away aggressively. You despised crying in front of people. 
Minho raises his hand to wipe the tears away for you but he quickly retracts it- you probably wouldn't want him to touch your face. It was enough that he had grabbed your wrist a couple of weeks before this. He quickly racks his brain for something to do, because the sight of your tears is making his heart ache in a way he hasn't felt before. It's as if he's feeling your emotions deep within him.
In desperation, Minho pinches your arm and you yelp, startled. "What was that for?" you whisper-shout and he raises his hands in defense, "I didn't know what else to do."
"So, you thought about pinching me?" you chuckle in bewilderment and he scratches the top of his hair sheepishly. 
"I mean, it worked. Look, you stopped crying," he points out raising his brows at you proudly and you shake your head at him.
"Remind me to never cry in front of you again." 
Minho grins at you before his face turns serious once again. "Look, you are the smartest person I know," he pauses, adding with a cheeky smirk, "After me of course." Which makes you giggle against your will. 
"Shut up", you lightly punch his chest and he smiles. "One test doesn't define you. You always work very hard. I wouldn't lie to you."
"Mm," you hum and he frowns at your lack of enthusiasm, but still, he doesn't comment. 
"No more crying," he wiggles his finger in front of your face and you roll your eyes, wiping the rest of your tears away. "Fine. Pretend as if this never happened."
"What are you talking about?" he asks as if confused, and you can't help the smile tugging at the corner of your mouth. It's as if Minho knows exactly what to say to cheer you up. 
"Come with me," he tells you, gently pulling you by the sleeve of your hoodie. 
"Where to?"
"I’m craving ice cream."
"And why do you need me?"
"You're craving ice cream too," he says in a matter-of-a-fact tone. 
"Only if you're paying," you add with a giggle and he whines loudly, "I feel so so used around you." 
True to his words, Minho takes you to the nearest ice cream parlor. It's a 20 minutes walk away and you are grateful for the distance because it helps you clear your head a bit.
Minho lets you pick whatever flavors you want, and when you hesitate between two of them, he tells the cashier to put them both into your cup. This is how you end up with a container of 5 scoops of ice cream. You insisted you'd share, and Minho begrudgingly agreed when you threatened to walk out and leave him.
You then walk to a deserted alley and sit on the sidewalk. You didn't want to be around people right now, and thankfully, Minho understood without you having to say a word.  
You munch silently on your ice cream and Minho does the same, the both of you lost in your thoughts. You naturally take turns holding the freezing container, so it wouldn't numb the fingers of one of you.
When you're done, Minho stands up to throw it away in a nearby trashcan before sitting back again next to you. 
Suddenly you feel him gently tapping your hand. You look down to find that you've curled your fingers into a tight fist, so much that there are crescent indents visible on your palm now. 
"Let's play thumb war," he tells you and you giggle at his words. You never knew what to expect from him. 
Still, as your fingers hold each other, and your thumb circles one another, you feel yourself calm down slightly. You play a couple of rounds, and you know he's going easy on you, allowing you to quickly trap his thumb down. 
No one has gone to such lengths to cheer you up, and you suddenly feel so grateful for Minho’s presence in your life. You didn't care in what shape he was in, you just needed him to be in it. Which in turn makes you think how bad it'd hurt if he ever leaves. 
You don't want Minho to leave. You've gotten so attached to him that the thought of not talking to him again makes your heart race in panic. 
Minho notices the change in your expression, suddenly melancholic once again. Your hand has gone limp in his, the thumb war long forgotten by you. 
He curses under his breath, before looking at you. "If I dance for you, will you quit being so sad?"
"Dance for me?" you repeat incredulously and he nods, "Yes. I’ll show you an upcoming choreography just... Please smile?" 
"Okay," you giggle, plastering a wide grin on your face. 
"Not like that you look scary."
"Get to dancing!" you clap excitedly and he rolls his eyes, standing up and looking through his phone for a particular music. 
"Oh and no comment!" he looks pointedly at you, and you nod, pretending to zip your mouth and throwing away the key. 
'Finesse' by Bruno Mars starts playing and you are left mesmerized by the way Minho dances. It's short but it leaves you yearning to see more. His body moves smoothly, hitting each beat effortlessly. He made it look as if dancing was second nature to him, that it came as easily to him as breathing. 
You were speechless, rightfully so. You wished you could build a world where all Minho did was dance. 
"That was-" you start when he stops the music but he cuts you off instantly, "I said no comment."
"But--" Minho places his finger on your mouth to silence you, seemingly not thinking too much of it. But the feel of his finger on your lips makes you dizzy. Minho quickly takes off his hand, a blush evidently creeping up his neck. 
"Let's just go home," he sighs in defeat and you laugh despite the intense feelings cursing through you.
You don't know if you are imagining it but you swear that your pinkies brush against each other on your walk back. As if there was this magnetic force pulling them together. You wondered what would happen if you just linked your pinky with his. Would he grab you by the hand or will he let go of you entirely?
You were too much of a coward to find out. You were scared of messing up anything with him. So, you'd settle for this. Stolen glances and random outings. You just need him in your life. 
"Thank you for today," you tell Minho once you arrive and he shrugs, as what he did wasn't a big deal.
"No, I mean it. Thank you," you repeat, trying your best to convey how sincere you were being. You take in a deep breath, before grabbing his hand and squeezing it, for a fleeting second, before dropping it again. 
Minho is sure that your hand will now be imprinted into his, that the lines tracing over your palm will merge with his as one. Your touch was barely there but it had electrocuted him. He wondered to himself if his body would be able to handle more from you. But he'd gladly burn in your fires for the sake of holding you. And he'd wait, unwaveringly, as time stretches alongside the two of you. He'd wait as long as it takes for you. 
"Yn, I..." he stammers, taking a step closer to you. His scent engulfs you and you shamefully close your eyes, inhaling it. When you open them again, you find Minho glancing down at your lips. You gulp, dazzled by his proximity. 
"You have a mole on your nose," you suddenly speak up and his eyes snap back to yours, an adorable confusion drawn on his features. 
"I like that mole," you continue and you wish you could dig yourself a hole and bury yourself in it. 
"Thank you," he chuckles and you nod vigorously, "You're welcome." 
"Can I ask you something?" he says and your breath hitches in your throat. "Sure."
"You don't like it when people touch you, right?" 
"Yeah."
"Can I ask why?" 
You want to confide in him, to tell him that it’s because you long for it, you crave it so badly. That this need has woven itself into the very fabric of your being. An ache so raw that it scares you at times. You’ve never known what it feels like to be held- it was uncharted territory to you. 
"Isn't everyone scared of the unknown?" you settle on saying, and he nods in understanding. Of course, he understood. No one knows you as well as him. 
"It's okay. I just wanted to know if I ever overstepped my boundaries."
"You didn't," you reply instantly. 
"Good. You'll tell me if I ever do, right?"
"I will." 
"Okay." 
"Um. I'll get going," you point behind you and Minho smiles at you, waving you off.
You walk for a few steps before coming back again quickly. You then grab Minho’s hand, gently squeezing it like before, "You are an amazing dancer." 
And then you drop it, running back towards your apartment block without waiting for a reply. 
Minho stays frozen in his place. You think he's an amazing dancer. And you held his hand for five seconds. 
That's four seconds more than the first time. 
Progress.        
✹✹✹
You haven't gotten out of your house for the past three days. 
Everything crashed around you rapidly, it made you realize that the ground you once stood on was only an illusion, elusive and fleeting. 
You were doing well; you were getting better. But then Monday came and you went out for a walk in the park near you. As you sat there, you saw a little girl playing on the swings, delightful joy dancing across her features. But then she fell to the ground and you instinctively stood up to help her, only to notice her mother running to her. 
The world stilled around you as you clearly saw it- how the little girl clung to her mother's embrace, her embodiment of hope and love. You never had that. You don’t even know what perfume your mother used because she never allowed you to get that close to her. 
You stood up abruptly, quickly heading back to your apartment block. As you ran up the stairs, you ended up bumping into one of your neighbors. You were quick to apologize but they ignored you, and the feeling of being invisible came back to haunt you ten times fold. 
You knew you shouldn’t have done it, you knew you should have deleted your mother’s number when she sent you away to university without a backward glance, relieved at the thought of you getting a full-ride scholarship and not needing her anymore. But you didn’t, you kept her number in the hopes that she’d call. On your birthday, on holidays, on a random Thursday to tell you that she did remember who you are. 
With trembling hands, tears welling in your eyes, you dialed your mother’s number for the first time in a year. You didn’t know what you were expecting. Maybe she regrets it. Maybe she misses you. Maybe she didn’t find the courage to mend her wrongdoings and that's why she never called. 
"Hello?" her voice rang through your apartment. Goosebumps erupted on your arms and your hold on the phone tightened. Her voice took you back to memories you thought you had buried. How you spent countless nights yearning to hear the sound of her voice, how you regretted it once she spoke to attack you.
You hate her. You miss her. You want to hang up. You need to ask if she's doing okay. 
“Who is this?” Her voice was devoid of recognition, freezing you in your tracks. You felt as if a bucket of ice was thrown over your head, dousing the flame of hope that flickered in your heart. 
She deleted your number.
You quickly hung up, placing your phone down on the table. The tears refused to fall. It was as if your body had long anticipated this outcome, leaving only your wounded soul to bear the pain. 
Healing isn't linear, you've read about it in books and heard it in shows and movies. One step back doesn't mean that your entire progress is gone. You know this, you've memorized those sentences. So why do you not believe them? Why does it feel as if you can never be free from the past? Why does it feel as if you’ll always seek something out of her? 
Those questions roamed your mind for the past three days, making you too tired at the prospect of lifting your limbs, let alone leaving your apartment. You sent your two friends a text, telling them that you're sick so they wouldn't worry. Not that you believed they would. Nothing made sense to you anymore.
You laid on your bed in utter silence- a tense quiet that was disrupted on the third day by someone knocking on your door. You didn't know who was there; you just hoped that they'd leave you alone.
To your surprise, you open the door to find Minho, some notes in his right hand and a coffee in his left. He sends an easy smile your way. You don't smile back.
"What do you want?" your voice is cold, but Minho doesn't bristle. A cheeky smile settles on his lips as he leans on your doorway.
"You didn't come to class for the past three days, so I brought you the notes. So, you wouldn't think our competition is unfair."
"Competition," you chuckle coldly, heading inside your apartment, and he follows suit. You start to pace around furiously, and Minho looks at you worriedly. "Competition?" you repeat, the word dripping off your tongue like venom. You turn around, marching towards Minho and standing a few inches from him. "You know what? Fuck you and your competition!"
"Yn-"
"Did it ever occur to you that I never wanted a part in this competition? That all I wanted was to be left alone?" you say, growing louder as you jab your finger into his chest repeatedly. "I never wanted any of this! Do you understand? I never wanted to be this way," you shout angrily in his face.
The worried look in Minho’s eyes snaps you out of your haze. You realize that you are being utterly ridiculous lashing out at Minho, when the one person you are mad at is yourself. 
Your anger quickly deflates, leaving in its trail an agonizing sadness. It's so sudden that it knocks the breath out of you, and you clutch your chest as if it could soothe the burn in your heart. Suddenly you are twelve years old again, crying in your room because you feel like no one has ever loved you.
But this time you aren't alone. Minho is in front of you, and his eyebrows are so furrowed you want to lean forward to ease the tension between them. His eyebrows, you liked his eyebrows, they were arched, and they framed his eyes nicely, and his eyes are brown and so big, and they always look at you softly and why is it getting so hard to breathe-
"Did I do something to you? Whatever it is I’m sorry," Minho panics, cutting off your frantic train of thought. But now, the weight of guilt adds to your overwhelming emotions. You shouldn't have lashed out at him, he brought you coffee and you yelled at him. Maybe your mom was right after all.
You shake your head left and right furiously, your words coming out in hiccups. Since when did you start crying? "It isn't- it isn't you."
"Then let me help you-", he steps forward, hand outstretched, but you take three hurried steps back and wrap your hands around yourself protectively. "Don’t. Please, don't."
"Why are you pushing me away?" his tone isn't accusatory. You've learned time and time again that Minho wouldn't do anything that made you feel uncomfortable.
"You won't understand."
"Then make me."
"Because I’m afraid!" the words slip out of your mouth before you can stop them. "I’m afraid if you ever hug me, I wouldn't be able to go back to hugging myself. I'd need you and I can't afford to need someone else."
You regret the words as soon as they fleet away from your mouth. He would look at you differently, he would find you pathetic and then he’d leave. And you wanted him to leave. But you also wanted him to stay. It was all so confusing. 
You felt as if your being was torn between two great forces, each one of them trying to win the war raging inside you. You wished someone else would make the decisions in your place, for once.
Minho places the coffee and notes on the ground before approaching you, his palms facing up in a gesture of surrender. "I won't leave you," he says softly. "I’ll be by your side for as long as you'll have me."
"Minho..." your voice catches in your throat as you utter his name- like a broken prayer. He stands before you, his eyes shimmering like the reflection of a river on a sunny day.
"Please, let me make it better." 
You nod tentatively and Minho comes even closer to you. He was treating you like one would with a wounded animal, giving you a chance to ultimately back out. But for once, you listen to what your heart has been yearning for. Your bones are aching to be held, to feel the warmth of a body against your own, to feel safe and secure. 
Minho embraces you, wrapping his arms around your shoulders and bringing you to him. You slowly bring your arms up and lace them around his waist. You are afraid, deathly afraid. His grip is loose, and you almost can't feel him around you, but when you lay your head on his chest, he tightens his hold on you and you instinctively let out a sob. 
He's hugging adult you, the woman whose heart was once again broken by her mom. But he's also hugging little you, the girl who was craving affection from everyone around her. In that instant, Minho is hugging every single version of you that ever needed a hug. 
You were right to be scared because you don't want to let go, you want to stay in his arms because they feel safe, like a shield protecting you. You can't go back to not hugging Minho. 
The sensation is overwhelming and your knees buckle underneath you. But instead of holding you up, Minho falls to the ground with you, as if you are two inseparable pieces of one puzzle. He isn’t here to fix you, he’s here to break down with you and help you pick up the scattered pieces.
You think back to that night in the park when Minho told you about Japanese vases. At this moment, it dawns on you that Minho has found a way to become a part of you. He was the molten gold binding your broken parts together. He was the invisible thread stitching your wounds back together.
Who were you fooling? It was him; it was him all along. 
Minho rocks you gently as you cry and cry and cry. His hand finds your hair and he plays with it as you sob. He tells you you'll be okay, you'll feel better and you try to believe him, his words wrap around your bruises like a healing balm. 
"There, there, love. You are okay", he murmurs, tenderly patting your head. A fresh set of tears wells up in your eyes. Love.
"I’m sorry. I'm so sorry," you apologize as you pull away from his embrace. 
"Why are you apologizing? Is it because you wet my shirt? I don't mind," he reassures you with a smile and you shake your head. 
 "I was mean to you and you didn’t deserve it," you explain through hiccups.
"It's okay, you weren't mad at me, were you?" he asks, wiping your tears away so gently with his thumbs, careful not to irritate the sensitive skin.
"No. Still, it isn't okay and I’m sorry. I'm so sorry." 
"Shh, don't apologize. It's okay." you look at him doubtfully and he rolls his eyes playfully, "Here I’ll even do your silly pinky promise, okay?" he laces his pinky with yours, but then he suddenly leans forward and places a chaste kiss on your thumb pad. "There, sealed forever."
You giggle faintly as a blush dusts your cheeks, "That's not how it works."
"I know."
Your giggle was far different from the ones Minho was accustomed to. It was small, and it didn't brighten up your face like usual. But he was grateful for it nonetheless. He realized how much he missed your laugh, and how all the other sounds in the world pale in comparison to it.
In that moment Minho thinks to himself that he'd do anything to make you smile again. He'd make a fool out of himself if it meant making you happy. He'd settle for a simple tug at the corners of your mouth, anything but the sadness that seemed etched in your face, as if it was blended into the colors that drew you.
You tentatively move around, before laying your head on his lap. Minho's hand instinctively finds your hair and he starts to gently play with it. It feels as if you've done this a million times before, when in fact it was the first. 
There was something wildly intimate about laying on the floor with the man who just comforted you. It made you want to spill all your secrets to him, one by one, and have him hug you through them.
"Did you mean it? When you said you'll stay?" you felt so vulnerable in his hold, as if he could twist you whoever he liked. But you trusted him. You trusted yourself with Minho.
"I did. Your walls are always up. It's hard to peek behind them. But I don't want to tear them down. I want you to slowly unbuild them. I want you to do it for yourself."
To do it for yourself, it's hard to even know who you are anymore. 
"I want to tell you."
"You don't need to."
"I know, but I want to."
"Okay. Take your time, kitten." he pats your head gently, and you try to sync your breathing to the rhythm of his touch. You were grateful that you were lying on his lap since you couldn't see his face. It made talking feel a little less daunting.
"On my 9th birthday... I was very excited. I'd been on my best behavior that month, trying to please my mom in the hope that, for once, we'd celebrate my birthday. Like a normal little family," you smile sadly, you were so hopeful back then.
"My birthday came, I woke up, excited. My mom was still asleep, nothing out of the ordinary. So, I made my breakfast and walked to my school. I wore my prettiest dress and put on pigtails with hair clips. It was my birthday after all," Minho smiles softly at your words, his hand now resting on your own.
"I got back home and waited for my mom to come back. She remembered my birthday, I thought. And then, she came but she didn't talk to me. So, I thought, oh a surprise party!" you chuckle, but this time the smile on Minho’s face is gone.
"It was then 11 pm, and the hope had slowly died in me. So, in my stupid innocent self, I went to my mom, and asked her "Did you forget my birthday?". And I remember... I remember the way she laughed. Cruelly. Like I had told her the funniest joke in the world. And then. Then she looked me dead in the eye and said 'I hate the fact that you are born. Why would I celebrate that?'"
Minho sucks in a deep breath at your words, and you exhale one right out. It felt comforting, to have someone else stomach the hurt for you. To take the weight off your shoulders, allowing you a few moments to breathe.
"I confronted her about it one day, but she said she doesn't remember saying that. It's funny how it was a random Thursday for her, but for me, it shaped my life." you smile bitterly, "I remember how jealous I was of the way the other kids talked about their mothers. They said the word so lightly. It must have reminded them of sunshine and ice cream and rainbows. But for me, it held an uncharacteristic heaviness to it. I grew to hate the word."
"I drove myself crazy, Min", you whisper and he brings you closer to his body, "was it me or was it her? When did it start? Was it because I was too loud as a child or maybe too quiet? Did I not cater to her fantasies of a kid? I wanted to remember every single thing that happened throughout my childhood, thread through every single memory. I tried to pinpoint the exact moment my mom stopped loving me."
Minho squeezes your hand tightly in his, and you feel as if he was pulling you away from the memory that had long trapped you. You were now watching it unfold from outside of the window, your hand in his, safe from the hurt it had inflicted on you.
"It's not you. It could never be you. Some people are simply not fit to be parents. It's never their kid's fault."
Minho tries his best to keep his touch soothing, to make his voice sound as soft as possible. But he was angry, he was so angry at the world for not taking care of you when you were younger. His heart broke, thinking of 9-year-old you being told such cruel words.
He wanted to turn back time and tell you that you were enough. He wanted to make the pain that seemed so anchored in you float back to the surface, and dissipate like sea foam meeting the shore.
But he couldn't do that. All he could do is comfort present you.
Minho gently pulls you up from his lap, making you sit upright. He crisscrosses his legs and you do the same. Your knees brush against each other and you feel a shiver run down your spine. You didn't know that even knees could emanate such warmth.
"Yn, look at me. The world wouldn't be the same without you in it," he cradles your face between his hands, "You hear me yn? I’m so thankful you exist."
His doe brown eyes are sincere, and it made you want to believe him badly. That's a good start, right?
"I’ll be back," he tells you, letting go of your face and standing up.
You hear Minho rummaging through the kitchen and you take the time to calm yourself down. Sharing those parts of you with Minho felt therapeutic. As if you were healing parts of your inner child. You have never talked about this with anyone before, maybe this is why it still hurt as badly.
Minho comes back five minutes later, his hands behind his back. You raise a brow at him inquisitively and he just smiles secretly at you. "Close your eyes," he tells you and you giggle, doing as he says. He crouches in front of you, and you hear him shuffle in his place for a bit.
Then, "Open your eyes yn," and you find him, in front of you, a cupcake you had stored in your fridge in his hands, and a makeshift candle lit up. "Happy 9th birthday, love. You did well."
You stare at him in utter bewilderment. You couldn't believe your eyes. How could this man be so thoughtful? He was wishing you a belated birthday, to compensate for the 9th birthday you didn't celebrate.
You panic, at the look in his eyes. You've never seen it, never dared to dream of it, of someone caring for you unconditionally. So, you try to scare him, to push him away. You didn't want him to regret knowing you.
"There are things I need you to know um", you chuckle nervously, "When I... When I throw up, I hold my hair, and when I’m sick I nurse myself back to health, and when I have a nightmare I- I hold my hand in the dark. It will be hard for me to hold yours instead."
"We'll start a finger at a time, yeah?"
"It will take time."
"I have time," he speaks easily, as if loving you was effortless and not a strenuous task. You couldn't fathom it.
"You are too busy-", he cuts you off instantly, "Not for you." 
"The world doesn't stop because we need it to." Your voice is quiet; this is your very last try. You are tired of fighting. You are putting down your armor and waving a white flag.
"We'll make it stop. Here, the two of us. On this floor. We'll take as long as we need to."
"I never deemed you as an optimist", you smile a little, a hint of teasing in your tone.
"I’m not," he pauses, gazing down at the cupcake between his hands and then at you. "But I feel that we deserve a bit of happiness together, don't we?"
"We do."
"Then make a wish."
You close your eyes for a few seconds, before blowing on the candle.
"What did you wish for?" he asks a fond smile on his face.
The answer came naturally to you, you didn't even need to think about it. "I wished for you."
Minho's lips come crashing down on yours, and you imagine that this is what it feels like to see colors for the first time. To discover a new world beyond the one you've always known.
The kiss isn't urgent nor feverish, it is one of comfort. Your lips spilling the words you have not yet said to each other. "I love you," he kisses you, "I love you too," you kiss him back. "I need you to stay," you swipe your tongue across his bottom lip, "I’m never leaving you," he opens his mouth allowing you entrance.
As you kiss him, you remember a fact you once learned in high school. The human body possesses seven trillion nerves. And for the first time in your life, you feel as if each of these nerves is alive. You feel that even the smallest atom is electrocuted with Minho’s love and it’s all you know within you.  
You feel as if the pain, the hurt, and the ache you've been through are slowly unraveled, and in their place, a timid happiness is starting to bloom. You imagine that when Minho’s lips met your own, the seven trillion nerves inside you exhaled in relief 'We've made it', they said, 'we'll finally be okay.'
Epilogue
You've always thought that epilogues were useless. How can you resume the rest of your life in one sentence, boil down the rest of your existence in mere pages? Because life doesn't stop at the epilogue, and a new book can start once again, right where you left it off.  
But with Minho, you didn't mind an epilogue. On the contrary, you longed for a soft one. You wanted to rest on this last page, you wanted to lay your worries on the words and tuck them into the syllables. And you wanted to wake up anew.
And this wasn't the end of your story with Minho. A lot happened after it. But it didn't worry you, because epilogues are about the one thing that doesn't change throughout the long march of time. And luckily for you, that constant was Minho’s love for you. From that day he held you, he has never let go.
It took time, for his warmth to seep through your bones. It took time, for your heart to forget the cold. But you wanted to do it. With him. You wanted to love and be loved.
The sound of cats mewling fills your apartment, pudding can always be found in your fridge and you haven't felt invisible in years.
#FINALLY!!! turning the lights down low scattering rose petals lighting candles…my date w invisible thread is upon me at last 🥰#also i’m doing a sahar-style live reaction so apologies if i comment on literally every little thing that happens hehe im excited#hitting me w the clay metaphor right off the bat...i'm in awe of how perfectly you described childhood development w just a single analogy#molding the reader when she’s young n impressionable and leaving those imprints to harden beyond repair even after she's grown#what a beautifully melancholy way to describe her relationship w her mother and how it affects her view of herself i love it so much ㅠ#lesm inho. leemingo. LEMINHO!!! THE LAZY SMILE NOO U ALREADY GOT ME 😭😭😭 it’s so fucking over and i only just started oh my god#his eyes being the first thing she notices when they meet…the reader is just like me fr but describing them as black holes that draw her in#is making me crazy IT’S SO TRUE!!!! the most mesmerizing eyes known to man that warp space n time this comparison is absolutely stunning#the chill in his hand reminding her of a horrible memory like that 😞 so heartbreaking but also such a clever way to give insight into#the reader's character as well as insight into the the type of relationship she n lino will have and how it will likely resurface old wound#“u weren't sure what u would find on the other side nor did u have any desire to find out” u conveyed the odd magnetism of his eyes SO WELL#im very glad she got a higher grade than him i was not prepared for the smugness that would ensue if he beat her -_-; but a detail i really#adore is how casually lino takes the loss i feel like it goes to show that he truly doesnt have any ill intent despite being so provocative#the cat cafe is called limbo PLEASE THATS SO CUTE 😭 lino mimicking her words…n dodging the pillow i cant stand him actually#to be minho is to be insufferable and get away w it…she should throw a brick at his head next (<- madly in love)#oh my god the part where he laughs at her for hitting her head but from that point on covers that edges of the tables to protect her 😭😭😭#i’m going to be sick to my stomach thsi is the most minho expression of care on earth. all the careful linoisms u included are killing me ㅠ#comparing his eyelashes to the wings of a butterfly ARE U KIDDING!! that has me clutching my heart it's such delicate n gentle beauty#i love that he’s just as competitive as the reader but in a much more lighthearted way…he sees it almost like a game whereas she sees it as#a very serious demonstration of her worth. minho eventually becoming the one she wants to prove herself to rather than her mother#is so intensely sweet and heartwrenching at the same time ): in just a few months he's shown her a healthier love than her mother ever did#THEIR FIRST SNOW TOGETHER NONONO 😭 this entire scene has me inconsolable oh my god LINO W HIS SNOWBALL HE IS SO ANNOYINGLY CUTE#“u cant decide if ur shock was from the impact or from how beautiful happiness looks on him” critical hit on my heart…u painted such a#lovely picture of his laughter i can clearly envision his wild giggles and the way his entire body laughs w him when he’s really excited ㅠ#I WAS GONNA COMMENT ON THE SNOW NOT SPARKING THAT SAME AWFUL MEMORY THIS TIME 😭 his laughter brought her so much warmth she didnt even have#the chance to think abt it i'm so devastated by this parallel…little by little she’s healing w him and melting the frost her mother left#the way the reader grabs her fork to threaten him like he did w the spoon HELP theyre rubbing off on each other without even realizing it#every character detail u included is so well thought out u did a brilliant job ㅠㅠ it makes them human and the story all the more immersive#lino letting her eat first while he cooks the meat and him blushing everywhere when she feeds him MY BABY 😞💔 he thinks he’s so slick…#asking how she’d dispose of a body over dinner…lee minho master of romance everyone 🙏 but literally OF COURSE HE WOULD
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iceunhie · 8 months ago
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voicelines about you: as their lover ! (part 2)
featuring: sunday, aventurine, blade (+ black swan, acheron) [ part 1: dan heng, jing yuan, gepard, kafka, jingliu. ]
notes: well. the long awaited part 2 is here! (i took absolutely wayyy too long to finish this but a lovely anon requested the penacony cast so i just waited until now haha) stay tuned for either a future aventurine fic or a sunday fic tho; reblogs are appreciated! main masterlist.
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Sunday
About [Name]: Ah, you speak of my beloved. [Name] has managed to strike your interest as well? Heh, I'm joking. You aren't that type of person, no? ….But yes, my lover truly is quite stellar, if not incomparable. I doubt I'd find anyone in the universe as lovely as I do them.
About [Name]: Smitten Robin often jokes about how my eyes change whenever I see them. ‘Softens like the smitten man you are,’ she says. Well, my sister is hardly wrong about matters of the heart, and to be fair, her words are indeed correct. While I cannot be with them every second of the day, despite my only wish to do so…. I suppose this much is fine. At the very least, this bewitched version of myself shall ward any that dare take [Name] away from me.
About [Name]: Preparation. …My mansion has everything [Name] shall ever desire. As for I, what I only desire is them alone, and for them to be right by my side. When the time is right, what's mine shall also be theirs, and none shall ever separate the two of us again. Should anyone attempt it, well, there's a reason my mansion is built the way it is.
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Aventurine
About [Name]: [Name], [Name], [Name].... I see that you too have an eye for priceless treasures. Unfortunately for you, this particular one is already mine to behold. Mm, I wonder how my lover must be faring right now…. Missing them is truly, horribly debilitating.
About [Name]: Unworthy Whenever I think of [Name] being with me, of all people… Sometimes, the thought is unbearable. To think they would care for someone like me…. How truly lucky I am. Or maybe it's the other way around? Hehe, take a guess.
About Topaz: Contradictory Topaz and [Name] get along fairly well, despite her rather obvious dislike for me. Nonetheless, I suppose I can understand why. My lover is irresistibly charming~ Now, does this make me jealous, I wonder…. How about we bet on that?
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Blade
About [Name]: Though this sword may be battered and broken, if you harbor any intention of harm towards them, I will not hesitate to brandish this blade.
About [Name]: Mara Infliction When afflicted with mara, the senses are ravaged ceaselessly, muddying the mind—being unable to distinguish ally from foe. This is my path. And yet their face is clear, pure amidst the carnage, alleviating the haze for but a moment. My mind may be overridden with hatred, but I will never forget that feeling of salvation.
(BONUS: Kafka’s Voiceline about [Name] !) About [Name]: Truly A Shame Bladie’s little darling, hm? Definitely a wonder, that one, taming him so easily. Those two are definitely an interesting case, that's for sure. Scary, marastruck Blade and them…. truly a shame. Even I know just how the ending of that particular script will end.
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Acheron
About [Name]: …They are my lover, yes. Hm? Tell you more about them? Heh, I think you'd have better luck asking [Name] instead of me. I probably wouldn't even know where to begin.
About [Name]: Keeping Memories Despite the fact of my memories being in less than the best condition, [Name] always tells me about all the exciting things they've come across, whether it be delicious food from various planets, or even the most mundane things like the sound of the rushing water, the sight of fireflies in the night. They truly make everything worth remembering.
(BONUS: Black Swan’s Voiceline about [Name] !) About [Name]: Eye Of The Storm Ah, you speak of that Galaxy Ranger's companion…. The abyss that is her consciousness seems to only become calm in the face of them, akin to the eye of the storm. A shining light in the middle of nothingness—that is something that even she cannot let go of. No wonder Miss Acheron is quite taken with them.
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Black Swan
About [Name]: The memories of Memokeepers are sorted into various categories by their importance. As my lover, my memories of them hold the greatest value of all. Such memories…. even if the Remembrance wishes for me to hand them over, I doubt I will ever allow it.
About [Name]: Dancing My proficiency in the act of dancing is all thanks to my continued practice with [Name] on our shared time together. Fufu, ‘dates,’ if you will. Every moment I spend in their arms, swaying to the beat of the music at every turn… those are the memories I wish to forever retain.
About Acheron: Indebted One time, Miss Acheron managed to get lost in the middle of the Reverie Hotel’s halls... as usual. [Name] came across her then, and proceeded to have a lovely chat with her. I owe her a debt for keeping my lover company as I was preoccupied with some matters the Garden of Recollection entrusted to me to relay to the family. Next time, perhaps I should invite her over for some dinner with [Name]....
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end notes thanks for sticking around the part 2 (for the ogs who read pt 1) and do look forward to more HSR content in the future! also did i say i love aventurine
© 𝐈𝐂𝐄𝐔𝐍𝐇𝐈𝐄 : do not repost, copy, or plagiarize my work.
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harunayuuka2060 · 2 months ago
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Azul: I'm sure you already know why you're here.
MC: *has been summoned to Octavinelle*
Azul: If a third party intentionally causes one party to breach their legally binding contract, they could be sued for tortious interference.
Azul: That's what you've been doing for some time now.
MC: ...
MC: I'm afraid I lack knowledge when it comes to business matters. Surely, you won’t hold that against me.
Azul: That's unfortunate. However, I can use other methods to ensure you fully understand what you've done.
MC: *smiles* Oh, would you?
Azul: *confused frown* You seem quite confident for someone who just came from another world.
MC: Yes, considering I've never been from this world, I certainly know how to put you at a disadvantage.
Azul: I don’t have time for bluff— *his eyes widened*
Azul: How—WHERE DID YOU GET THAT?!
MC: The only place you can find this photo is at the Atlantica Memorial Museum.
MC: I just happened to go there with my dorm leader and then I saw this photo.
MC: Something in the back of my mind urged me to get it.
Azul: You’re intending to use that as a blackmail material.
MC: Yes.
Azul: ...
Azul: *forces a smile* It takes more than that to intimidate me.
MC: ...
MC: I see. You're right.
MC: If others were to see it, it wouldn’t bother you.
Azul: Y-Yes. Now hand it to me.
MC: ...
MC: *stood up from their seat* No. This photo represents a cherished memory. If you won't value it, I may as well keep it.
Azul: ...
MC: *makes their way to the door*
Azul: Wait! We can still discuss—
*The door shuts.*
Azul: ...
Jade: *who didn't bother to interrupt throughout their conversation*
Jade: That was quite clever. *chuckles*
Jade: It's been a while since someone outsmarted you, Azul.
Azul: Quiet!
Azul: I need to steal that photo back.
Jade: Leave it to me.
Floyd: Eh~ Was the photo even legit?
Jade: Yes. We saw it with our own two eyes.
Floyd: *sigh* Alright. Who is it?
Jade: It's the person who single-handedly defeated a group of Savanaclaw students.
Floyd: ...
Floyd: *flashes an exciting yet terrifying smile*
Floyd: Why didn't you say earlier~?
Malleus: *sad pouty face* Aren't you heading back to the dorm with Dada?
MC: *smiles apologetically* There's something I need to do.
Malleus: ...
Malleus: *sigh* Alright.
MC: By the way, Dada, please try not to eat too much ice cream today.
Malleus: *pouts*
MC: *chuckles*
Malleus: *smiles* Well, just call me if you run into any trouble.
MC: *nods*
Malleus: *kisses their forehead then disappears*
MC: ...
Floyd: Eh~ How sweet~ Is Sea Slug your boyfriend~? *appears from the place where he's hiding*
MC: No.
Floyd: Are you sure~? Hehee~
MC: You're not here to be curious about that.
Floyd: Wow, straight to the point~. I like that.
Floyd: I've been wanting to give you a squeeze since the tournament~.
*A student rushes to report to Crowley.*
Scarabia student: Sir! MC and Floyd are fighting on Main Street!
Crowley: What?!
*Crowley, along with Professor Trein and Professor Crewel, hurried to Main Street to break up the fight between MC and Floyd.*
Crowley: Stop right this instant!
Professor Trein: Leech! You ought to know better than to harm students who are weaker than you—
Floyd: *turns his head* Huh?!
Professor Trein: ...
*MC's uniform is crooked, and their hair is messy from the fight, while Floyd, on the other hand, has light bruises on his cheek and traces of blood on his nose.*
Professor Crewel: ...
Professor Crewel: *looks at MC* Did you win, pup?
Floyd: I didn't lose yet, Beakfish!
MC: ...
Crowley: That's enough!
*In the faculty office, MC and Floyd are being asked why they fought in the first place.*
MC: ...
Floyd: ...
Professor Crewel: Aren't you both going to speak up?
MC and Floyd: ...
Crowley: Since you refused to provide a statement, I’m afraid both of you will have to face punishment.
Crowley: You will be helping the ghosts in the cafeteria for the next two weeks.
Floyd: *frowns* Why~?
MC: I'll do it.
Floyd: ...
Floyd: *smiles* Seashell-chan~ Let's continue our fight when no one's looking~.
Professor Trein: No. That was the end of it.
Floyd: Tch.
MC: ...
Azul: You lost to MC and failed to retrieve the photo.
Floyd: Eh~ Was I supposed to get it~?
Azul: JADE TOLD YOU!
Jade: It seems Floyd forgot due to his excitement.
Azul: ...
Azul: *breathes in* I'm going to handle this myself from now on.
767 notes · View notes
celestie0 · 8 months ago
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choso x reader | punk rock au [18+]
in another life ch.1 cupid's arrow
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ᰔ pairing. punk rock au - bass player! choso x reader (f)
ᰔ summary. you and choso were lovers in college when him and his rock band were just nobodies with nothing but a dream, but when his band strikes a deal with an up-and-coming record label in tokyo, you make the tough decision to break up with him since you couldn’t go with him to the city. flash forward seven years, his band is the biggest rock band in the world, n you move from the countryside to tokyo with your fiancé nanami to start your new life together. but in the heart of the city, home to many, there’s one person there that still has the power to turn your whole life upside down. and when you run into him again after all those years, feelings you didn’t know were still haunting you come crashing back all at once, and you’re not sure what it is you want from your life anymore.
ᰔ warnings/tags. 18+, fluff, angst, smut, punk rock au, partying, drinking/alcohol, weed usage, cigarette usage, romance, slow burn, friends to lovers, second chance romance, time skips, love triangle, bad boy choso, slight age gap (five yrs), longterm pining, jealousy, messy decisions, you know the drill
ᰔ chapter. 1/x (probably 6)
ᰔ words. 10.2k
a/n. hellooooo aaa welcome to my new choso fic :'') i'm so excited for this one! i'm just laughing at how i cannot just stick to a oneshot idea and somehow end up planning out a fullblown series instead hahah. but anyways, i hope you enjoy! thank you to everyone that wanted to be on the taglist, i'm really looking forward to diving into this story. see you at the bottom!!
alsooo my m00tie @sykosugu and i decided to post for our fics at the same time hehe she has a really spicy suguru x reader fic called 'on the run' that i highly recommend so go check that out as well if you're interestedd <33
nav. ch1 :: ch2 (pending)
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“and there was something about you that now, i can’t remember. it’s the same damn thing that made my heart surrender.”
present day. summer.
“We’re gonna miss you so, so, so much, love,” Mai groans, pulling you in towards her for a hug and you reciprocate with fondness.
Another pair of arms wraps around you, grip much tighter and you protest through a difficult breath. “Do you really have to go?” Nobara asks.
You tap on the skin of her arm, urging her to ease her hold in this group hug, and she finally relents and the three of you pull apart from one another. There’s a slight gasp from your lips as you breathe in fresh summer air. “I do, Nobie, I’m sorry. Nanami said it’s the final decision.”
You’re standing on hot concrete in front of a little countryside cottage that you’ve called home for years, but will soon just be a memory. You know which light switches illuminate corners of the rooms, and which creaking wood panels on the floor to avoid when looking for a midnight snack. It’s where you spent years studying for finals, arguing with your mom, learning how to care for Ms. Roxie, and it’s where you fell in love. More than once.
Your parents gave the house to you and Nanami once the two of you became engaged, but that blessing was soon to be given away, as Nanami received news six months ago that he was being promoted and relocated to Tokyo. Now, you have two bags in your hands, your purse slung around your shoulder, and a suitcase filled to the brim with the life you’ve tried to stuff in it. Your taxi driver has the other suitcase, because there were some things you couldn’t leave behind after all, and he’s putting it in the trunk right now.
“Nanami is so rude to take you from us,” Mai sighs, “but at least you’ll be one of those cool city girls now. So scary. I heard trends change faster there than the leaves on Rowan tree during spring.”
Nobara lets out a gasp that’s only half exaggerated. “No way! It can’t be!”
The taxi driver calls after you with a quick question, to which you answer back with a shout from where you stood. A quick glance at your watch tells you it’s time to get moving, as you’ll be taking a connecting train once you reach Tokyo that you need to be on time for. And then he’ll be there. Nanami will be waiting for you there, to lead you into the life that he’s started to make for the two of you.
“I’ll call so very often,” you promise the two of them, “and I will miss you two so very often as well.” Tears prickle in your eyes, and it seems to be contagious as they shimmer in Nobara and Mai’s eyes as well. Another group hug takes place between the three of you, harsh sun beating down with birds chirping in the distance as you try to take in the last few moments you’ve been granted of this place. “Take care of Roxie for us,” you say through a sniffle, “to you, it may seem like you’re only the bearer of food for her, but I promise that little kitty will love you two like no other.”
They both nod at you as you pull away, and you swipe at a tear that rolls down your cheek as you roll your suitcase down the pebbled walkway of your now past home.
The taxi driver helps hoist your suitcase into the trunk and places your other two bags into the back seat. You take a seat at the front with him, clicking the passenger seatbelt, and you roll down the window to wave bye with blown kisses as the taxi driver pulls away from the rocky mud road with crunching under the wheels. You watch Mai and Nobara and your home in the side view mirror until they’re no longer visible, but their voices of farewell linger in the air for a moment more.
“Alright, ma’am, bound for Tokyo!” your taxi driver chirps, his rough-looking hands opening and closing a few times to stretch out the joints of his fingers before tightly gripping onto the steering wheel again.
“Yes, Tokyo,” you murmur softly, gaze set out the window of the familiar street shops and stretches of patchy trees you know you’ll miss once you’re in the city.
“What’s your name?” the man asks, a thick country accent rolling off his tongue, with a sweetness like honey.
You turn your head to look at him more closely. The hair of his eyebrows is bushy, somewhat unkempt, and he has thick lines across his cheeks and forehead that can only mean that he’s lived a lot of life.
You tell him your name and he nods slowly as the two of you stop at a through road, a few school children hurrying past before he turns right onto the main road. “That’s a nice name. Which one of your parents gave it to ya?”
“Um. Both of them?”
He lets out a noise of acknowledgement, and doesn’t ask a further question. You smooth out the fabric of your long skirt with a hand, then toy with the band of your simple watch. Just when you think a comfortable silence has fallen between the two of you, and you think you have the luxury of losing yourself in your thoughts with sights beyond the polished glass window, the man speaks up again.
“Alright then, miss, tell me a story.”
You raise an eyebrow at him. “Pardon?”
“We’re gonna be spendin’ three hours in this car together, darlin’. It’s either I talk your ear off or you talk mine off,” he says, broad shoulders rolling backwards once as he gets comfortable in his driving position.
“Uh…do we need to talk at all?”
He glances over at you for a moment. The car wheels grind over rocks on gravel road near an agricultural field, and his fingers flex once again on the wheel. “You younger generations are so stuck in your own worlds. Entertain some conversation with the poor old taxi driver, will ya?”
You sigh, folding your hands in your nap neatly. “Alright. I don’t really have many stories to tell, though.”
“A young lady like you, packin’ up her whole life to move to a big city? I beg to differ,” he counters.
His words have you tucking your bottom lip under your teeth, a few blinks of your eyelids to process his observation of you. Your mind searches for stories to tell. Maybe that moment last week when you watched a momma duck waddle across a bridge with all seven of her baby ducklings. Or maybe you could tell him about that time you drove your car into a ditch the night of the comet festival and you swear you saw a UFO in the sky. The story you’ve been telling a lot lately, though, was the one of how Nanami proposed.
But then there’s a different story that comes to mind. With hazy images of blinding stage lights in dim venues, cigarette smoke wafting through the air, sounds of bass and drums and cheers. Smell of dry grass, the feeling of your back against a blanket, heart beating fast underneath the stars in front of a twinkling lake. And forever in your memory, the patterns of his inked skin.
“You got a boyfriend?” the man asks, suddenly.
“Are…are you hitting on me?” you ask awkwardly.
“Oh, no, ma’am,” he shakes his head, lifting his left hand up from the steering wheel and turning the back of it to face you. A silver ring adorning his fourth finger shimmers from the reflected sunlight through the window. “Happily married. Been with my missus for 22 years.”
A small smile makes its way onto your face as you relax into your seat a little, feeling calmer. “Oh, I see. I’m sorry for assuming. And I have a fiancé, actually.”
“Oh?” he chirps, stealing a quick glance at your left hand that was still folded neatly underneath your right one in your lap. “How come I’m not seein’ a ring?”
You tug at the small chain around your neck, a chill felt as diamond stone and cold metal drags against the skin of your sternum before you pull out your own promise of marriage, dangling it in front of your chest for him to steal another glance at. “I wear it around my neck. I’m a pottery teacher, so I usually take it off when showing my students any demos. I figured if I kept taking it off like that, I might lose it, so I just wear it around my neck now.”
“That’s interesting,” he comments, “It’s a real nice ring, that’s for sure! Tell me about this man you’re marryin.”
Your heart aches at the thought of Nanami. It’s been six months since you’ve seen him, since he relocated to Tokyo first, and you’ve missed him every day since. You were in the middle of the academic year at the elementary school you taught at, so they asked you to stay back, but Nanami had already accepted the promotion, thus the two of you made the decision that he would move to Tokyo first to get situated and you’d soon follow in the summer. It was a lot of stress to handle as just one person; searching for apartments on top of managing the heightened expectations from his boss from his new role, but he did it all without a complaint. Because he loves you, and that’s who Nanami was. Someone who would move mountains for you. He’s worked hard to make a place for you in Tokyo, one to call home.
“He really loves me,” you say to the man, softly.
“And you love him?”
“So much.”
“Was he your first love?”
Your breath catches in your throat from his question, a small chill running down your spine. The silence that settles could’ve lasted two seconds or two centuries, and you never would’ve known.
You lick your lips before answering. “No, he wasn’t.”
“Hmm…” the man hums. Bumpy roads are now smooth as he turns onto properly laid roads, the exit from your town onto intercity roads. “I can tell.”
“You can tell?” you ask, skeptic in your tone as you tilt your head at him.
“I can tell from your voice that there was someone else before. Someone who meant a whole lot to you, but he went away for some reason,” he says.
You’re not sure why there’s a lump in your throat from his words, a heavy thing with so much substance that it threatens to weigh your heart as well. Your eyes study the side of his face. “You’re getting all of that from my voice?”
The man’s expression is blank as if it were tabula rasa, something so different from the way you’ve felt for so long now, like your heart has been torn in two. There was something so tempting about it; the luxury of a clean slate. Of a new beginning. A fresh start. And it’s hard not to imagine how you would’ve painted things differently.
“Tell me about him,” the man says, the story he was looking for having been found. “Your first love.”
“He…” you start, shocked that you’re actually answering, but it’s like an invitation you can’t resist, “he was my first boyfriend…my first serious boyfriend. I met him the summer after high school. During a summer like this one.”
.
.
.
seven years ago. summer.
chapter 1. cupid’s arrow.
“C’mon, faster!” Mai exclaims, her hand wrapped around your wrist to tug you across the dim streets of downtown. 
“Just— wait— Mai, please, slow down,” you’re stumbling after her, feet failing to keep up, and you almost crash right into her when she comes to a sudden halt on the sidewalk.
“This is it,” she says, staring up at the sporadically blinking neon lights of what appears to be a small venue, black marquee letters that spell out Backseat Serenade Tonight @ 10pm stand out to you in a way that feels haunting. “We’re so late, let’s head inside.”
Mai drags you inside, and the security guy is less than thrilled by the commotion as he stands in front of closed double doors. You can feel the bass of music vibrating the walls, accompanied by loud shrill screams and chants coming from inside, and the red velvet flooring underneath your feet fuel you with static as you two approach the man dressed in full black.
Mai fumbles with her purse to pull out her phone, and the man scans the barcoded tickets on her screen before giving the two of you wristbands to wear and then he opens the door for the two of you.
The inside of the venue is small but packed, minimal lighting save for moving lights that illuminate the band on stage, but it’s even harder to see anything over the heads of people with their hands up in the air. Mai’s grip on your forearm is tight as she roughly weaves the two of you through the crowd, determined in her gait but you feel the need to apologize to the people she’s shoving in the process. You’re surprised at how fast the two of you make it to the front barricades, thanks to Mai’s nimbleness alone, and your eyes raise to the scene onstage through wafting smoke through the air.
“Alright, alright, alright,” one of the band members chimes right as the final instrumentals of the song begin to fade. His hair is a pale silver under dusty lighting, pushed up from out of his face by a black headband snapped to his forehead, and his eyes are distinctly blue. He has an electric guitar hanging from his neck by a thick black strap. He raises both of his hands up into the air, waving them down a few times to calm down the crowd, and there are scattered hushes surrounding you and Mai. “This is our last song, and we just want to thank you all so much for coming out tonight! This crowd’s the best we’ve ever had!” 
The people cheer in response as a light and relaxed melody begins to tune together from the instrumentals on stage. You hear Mai groan beside you. “What the fuck?! We missed the entire set?!” 
Your hands curl around the cold metal of the barricade dividers and your eyes sweep across the stage. There’s a man in the far back with short black hair, bouncing his leg up and down as he’s seated behind a drum set, fidgeting with wooden sticks in his hands, and you’re puzzled by the fact that he’s wearing a very poorly fitted suit onstage. Off to the right, a man with pink hair is messing with the headphones snapped to his ears in front of an electric keyboard, spread fingers pressing down on chords, and you can vaguely see the black nail polish at the tips of his fingers. A woman with mid length blonde hair and pink highlights stands at the front, her hand wrapped around the mic resting on top of the stand. She’s laughing, tipping her head back at something else the electric guitar player says over the mic, but you’ve drowned out the words because your eyes finally land on what’s directly in front of you.
With an almost bored expression on his face, a man stands with a matte black bass guitar hung from his neck as he has one foot up on the top of a subwoofer located flush to the edge of the stage. His hair is raven black, longer at the nape of his neck with shorter layers scattered, and tendrils fall over his face. There’s a glint to his polished black shoes off of where you’re standing, and he’s wearing tight black jeans that cling to the thick and lean muscles of his calves and thighs, with a leather belt fastened around the circumference of his hips. The shirt that’s tucked into his jeans is just as tight to his skin, and a small gasp leaves your lips when you take in the sight of his arms covered in intricate patterns of ink. His right arm is practically covered from the wrist all the way up to the cut of his short sleeve, likely beyond, and his left arm has ink traveling up to his forearm only, like he’s still working on mapping it all out. You watch the way his biceps flex as he bends his arms, bringing his hands up to his face to push his hair back, and your heart is keeping fast rhythm with the music. 
“Cho!” the woman at the front speaks into the mic, turning her head to look at this man who you’re sure is the most beautiful man you’ve ever seen. “You’ve hardly said a single word tonight, baby. Not that that’s unusual though. Why don’t you say a few words before we kick off the last song?”
A bunch of whoos!! and ahhhs!!! and yesss!!! scatter throughout the crowd in the form of cheers and you watch the man furrow his brows together, a scowl forming on his face. There’s a band of black underneath his eyes that runs across the bridge of his nose, with perpendicular lines resembling arrows running down his cheeks. Dark purple eyes that match the dark shadows around them glint under flickering stage lighting as he takes his foot off the speaker and walks a few steps backwards to position himself at his stationed mic. 
“Fine,” he says, and you’re watching the way his lips barely brush against the mic as he speaks, “This is our last song. It’s called Lost Cause. Enjoy. Or don’t. It’s up to you. Who the fuck am I to tell you what to do.”
There’s only a slight beat of silence from the crowd before they’re cheering again, while his band members just stare at him stunned. The white-haired electric guitarist yells into his mic something like  “THAT’S IT?!” before the drum player cuts him off with three taps of his sticks in the air, and then the song commences from them on practiced reflex. 
The energy from the crowd is loud in the last few minutes of the show, smoke rising in the air from the machines spread across the raised stage, and you can’t tear your eyes away from the bass player. You rest your forearms on the cold metal in front of you, the sight of Mai jumping up and down in your periphery as she headbangs and shakes her hair. 
The bass player’s eyes start to scan the venue within what seems to be the final chorus of the song, chin tipping up and fingers continuing to strum as he assesses the back of the crowd first, then gaze darting throughout the center, before he begins to study the front barricade. You watch his every movement, mapping the trail of his sight, and your heart skips a beat when those dark eyes finally fall on yours. 
His eyes briefly flicker to your left, to continue his study of the crowd, but it’s as if his brain just registered something with a delay, and he quickly moves his gaze back to you in a double take. His eyes widen, bored expression quickly turned into one of surprise with a glint to his pupils, and you swear you’ve been struck by an arrow to your heart.
“Yaaaay! Thank you everyone!” the woman at the front exclaims, pulling her mic from the stand to walk around to make work of the crowd. The white-haired man approaches the edge of the stage with a pleased grin on his face, high-fiving all of the outstretched arms, and the man at the keyboard simply waves a few times before incessantly tuning buttons on his headphones. Drum boy hasn’t stopped playing some sort of loud rhythm as an encore. Your sight is set back onto the bass player, and he’s looking off somewhere else now. Somewhere backstage. 
“Hey!” the white-haired man exclaims once he’s made it in front of the two of you. “Mai! You made it!”
She reaches out to grab his forearm, tugging down harshly so he’s stumbling and dropping one knee to the stage floor, kneeling. “Of course I was gonna make it! Thanks for the tickets,” she’s yelling over loud ambient cheers and music, “this is my friend y/n, by the way. Oh, and this is Gojo, he’s the guy I was telling you about.”
You nod at him, and try to accept his outstretched hand when someone bumps you from behind and your hand is in favor of stabilizing yourself over the divider instead.
You can barely hear the laugh from Gojo’s position on the raised stage. “Just meet us backstage! We can chat for a bit with proper introductions and all.”
As the crowd begins to dissipate with people moving through the sets of double doors out back, Gojo hops off stage to take you and Mai through a side door that leads into a hallway that lines the back of the stage. You look up into the high ceilings with metal structural poles banding between the walls, and the dim yellow lighting in small bulbs bolted to the walls like a runway remind you of movie theater exit routes.
“So, what’d you guys think of the show?” Gojo asks, his arms raised up and hands interlocked behind his neck in a casual-not-so-casual way as he sends the two of you a lazy look over his shoulder. 
“Well, we only made it for one song since miss barista over here was running late from her shift,” she sighs, whacking your arm once with the back of her hand. You glance down and realize you didn’t even have the time to take your frilled and wrinkled apron off. “But, from what we did get to hear, AMAZING! AWESOME! SPECTACULAR!”
Gojo is grinning wide as he turns around to face the two of you, continuing to walk but backwards as he slaps the raised hand that Mai had in the air for him. “I’m so glad, I felt the pressure to please was high since I’ve been hyping up our shows to you for so long.”
“We’ve only known each other for like two weeks.”
“I know. But PSYCH 210 lecture at the ass crack of dawn really brings two people together, y’know.”
Mai and Gojo continue to laugh and talk about random things college-related, and there’s a stirring feeling in your chest that you’re surrounded by people older and much more well-lived than you. You’ve just graduated high school, barely a few months ago, but Mai was a few years older than you, so any time she tries to introduce you to her college friends, you feel the need to perform or be someone that you’re not so they’ll like you, despite the fact that you’re aware of the fallacy in that. And tonight, that responsibility feels much more daunting for some reason.
There are voices heard further down the hall, and as you approach, you notice the drum guy, keyboard guy, and devilishly handsome bass guy are all loitering around in that area, along with a few other people they seemed to have invited backstage. 
Gojo walks up to them, grabbing onto the bass man’s hand firmly before patting him on the back, then slings his arms around the other two. “This is Higurama,” he says, rubbing the top of the black-haired guy’s head with the knuckles of his fist, “he does drums for us. And this is Sukuna,” he says, about to repeat the same gesture to the top of his head but his wrist is grabbed and twisted, “ow, fuck, fuck, fuck– sorry.” Sukuna lets go of his wrist, scowl dissipating into sadistic amusement, and Gojo’s holding his wrist, now slightly red from the burn, with a pout on his face. “He does the keyboard. And all the techno sounds. And some other stuff I’ve frankly no fucking clue about.”
The two of them acknowledge you and Mai, along with the few other people who Gojo seems to know as well, and then Gojo’s approaching the bass player again before resting his elbow up on his shoulder, leaning his weight onto him and the man just crosses his arms across his chest, sending Gojo a side-eye. “Mai, I think you two have met before, but this is Choso. Choso Kamo, our bass player. Best bass player I’ve ever known to be honest. Be careful though, he might bite you.”
Choso scowls, rolling his shoulder back once to get rid of Gojo’s resting elbow. His eyes are on yours, boring into you deep, and when he darts his tongue out briefly to wet his bottom lip, you finally notice the silver lip ring near the corner of his mouth. “Hi. Nice to meet you,” he says, hand outstretched and you shake it with a mention of your name to him. The skin on his fingers feel rough from play, a small sacrifice to pay for the talent he’s harnessed over the years from plucking at strings. His eyes sweep down you once. “Why are you dressed like Strawberry Shortcake?”
“I–” you start, glancing down at your attire and feeling the heat pool in your cheeks, “I just got off a work shift. I work at a cafe.”
“Oh,” he responds, and you notice his hand is still holding onto yours, Your eyes trail the patterns on his skin, visible in more detail up close, and you find yourself lost in every line and swirl and scale and skull and cross, the only thing breaking you out of your trance being Mai’s jab of her elbow to your ribcage.
You gasp, snatching your hand away from Choso, and when you look up at his face, there’s a hint of amusement on it. 
“Babes, he was asking you a question,” Mai says, looking between you and the man in front of you.
“Huh?” you ask, suddenly flustered and you swipe your palm down your work apron to wipe the sweat that begins to perspire at your palm from the lingering heat of his hand.
“I was asking if you liked the show,” Choso says, tilting his head to the side and now he’s allowing his eyes to travel all across you in any way he wants. 
“I loved it,” you respond, almost breathlessly, “it was great. I mean– we only saw, like, one song. But still, really amazing.”  
“Only one song?” Choso asks, his eyebrow raising, “that’s a shame. You’ve gotta come to more shows then.”
Before you can respond, there’s a feminine voice heard down the hallway, sounding an awful lot like the one echoing off the speakers inside the concert venue, and then the blond woman who was the lead singer of the band skips right up to the group formulating in this hallway before wrapping her arms around Choso’s neck and pulling him down towards her in a kiss.
You’re standing there stunned, eyes immediately averting from the scene of the two of them in front of you, but in the corner of your eye you can see his arm wrap around her waist briefly before he pulls her away from him, and the release of her lips from his makes a sound that for some reason creates a pit in your stomach.
“Cho, baby, I just had an insane conversation,” she says, still practically hanging from his neck as she stands on tiptoes, “with this record label guy. He’s apparently hot shit in Tokyo, and he wants to offer us this city gig ‘cause he thinks we’re a potential sign-on, and–”
Choso’s hand reaches to the back of his neck, gripping around her wrist to pull it apart from her other one, and then her arms fall to her sides and her heels flatten to the ground as she blinks up at him. “That’s cool, Sana, but can we talk about that later?”
Gojo’s arms cross his chest as he leans forward, glaring at the woman. “Yeah. And as a band, not just with your lover.”
Sana rolls her eyes and scoffs, placing curled hands low on her hips. “He’s not my lover, bitch. Unless he’s my lover like you’re lovers with a blunt on a sunday– sucked off in a car ‘cause you’ve got nothing better to do.”
“That’s offensive to both of us,” Gojo grumbles but Choso just sighs, unbothered, as he rubs at the back of his neck. He makes eye contact with you again, and his expression sobers as though he forgot for a second that you were still standing there. 
Sana turns to you and Mai. “Hi, I’m Sana, nice to meet you guys. Sorry, I thought you two were some of our other friends, otherwise I wouldn’t have kissed Cho in front of you. I hate PDA, trust me.” 
Mai lets out an awkward laugh as she shakes her hand, and you almost don’t want to shake her hand, but you do just to be polite.
“You didn’t hate PDA that one time I was about to bag the girl I’d been talking to for weeks and you decided to grind your sorry excuse of an ass right up against me in front of her,” Gojo grumbles.
She waves a dismissive hand in the air. “Whatever, she thought you were gay anyways. Would’ve done yourself a favor if you actually grabbed my ass.”
She ignores the insulted gesture Gojo makes, cutting off whatever words he was about to spew with words of her own. “What are you girls doing after this? We’re having a post-show party, you two should come.” She glances at you. “Uh, love, I’d ditch the apron though. Unless it’s, like, some sort of fetish for you.”
You’re defeated as your arms cross your torso to grip the hem of your apron and pull it up over your head, shaking your head a bit to allow your hair to fall back into place, and then you fold the frilly article of clothing neatly before hanging it over your arm. “It’s not,” you sigh, too exhausted to be subject to the title of your occupation anymore. A small flicker of your eyes to Choso tells you he’s staring at you.
Sana shrugs. “So you pretty ladies wanna come?”
Mai shakes her head. “No, sorry, my baby here,” she says, wrapping her arm around yours tightly, “just graduated high school recently, so she’s too young for a party. I’ve got a responsibility to look after her. And throwing her into a room full of sleazy drunk punk college dudes is the opposite of looking after her.”
Sukuna comes around, leaning his arm against the wall, smirk on his face, as he eyes you like you’re something to steal. “Just graduated high school? So you just turned eighteen, sweetheart?”
Mai glares daggers at him. “Get the fuck away from her, Super Senior. You’re icky. Also, case in point proven.”
Sana whacks the back of Sukuna’s head, and he all but growls at her. “Stop being creepy,” she reprimands him before turning to Mai again. “No, I swear, it’s not like that. It’s chill, minimal alcohol. No drugs. Just a small get-together with a few of our fellow friends, and friends of fellow friends, from the music scene.” She leans against Choso’s arm, wide eyes looking up at him, but he doesn’t lean into her. “Right, Cho? No scary guys for her to worry about?” 
His eyes narrow at you, raking down your figure again, and his chest moves a little faster with his breath. “I’m against it. It’s no place for an eighteen-year-old. You’re a fucking idiot for trying to invite a girl who just recently graduated from highschool to a house party. She’s practically a kid.”
Your heart sinks from his words, and you feel juvenile standing in front of him, in a way that makes you angry and embarrassed at the same time, and you can’t bite back the words in time, “Whatever, at least I haven’t been on crack since the day I was born like you probably were.”
Almost all heads in this small hallway snap to you, if they weren’t already there before, wide eyes blinking before Gojo bursts out into a laugh, which dominoes into Mai’s laughter, and you barely register the way Sana looks you up and down once before forcing a smile. Choso’s surprised expression turns into a disgruntled one as he crosses his arms across his chest, and you can’t help but watch the stretch of his inked skin over his muscles as they flex. 
“I’ve never done crack, shortcake, and your lame insult only proves my point on your immaturity,” he scowls, leaning his upper body forward towards you, and his gaze briefly drops to your lips.
Sana comes in between the two of you, pressing herself up against him to get him away, and he takes an involuntary step back and now he’s scowling at her too. She turns around to face you, and there’s that forced smile again. “Uh, y’know what, sweets? Cho is sooo totally right, no place at all for a—I’m sorry, how old did you say you were?”
“Eighteen,” you say with a slight grit to your teeth.
“Oh! Yeah, no place for you, sorry,” she says, with a small jut of her bottom lip to signal a pout.
You roll your eyes at her, then glance past her at Choso who’s looking at you like he’s still got a few retaliating words for you on his tongue, but then he’s dropping his gaze to the neckline of your shirt, eyeing the shape of your breasts, even dipping further down your legs and you let out a scoff.
“You sure enjoy checking me out for someone you think is practically a kid,” you spit back.
He’s not angry this time, the corner of his mouth simply tipping up slightly into a smirk. “I meant you’re too young to drink, but you’re old enough to fuck, so spare me the attitude.”
Your cheeks flush at his comment, nonetheless made in front of a group of people who were practically strangers to you, and you’re about to give him a piece of your mind when Mai grabs your forearm and Gojo places himself between you and jerkface. 
“Woah! Look at the time,” Gojo chirps, glancing at his wrist that was absent of any time-telling device but he rolls with it anyway, “should probably head out now, since the venue’s closing soon. Y’know, grab our stuff.”
Mai nods her head at you in response to his words, sending a single glare Choso’s way before exchanging some pleasantries with Gojo and then dragging you down the hallway with her towards the exit.
“Hey–” you begin to complain, her grip on you starting to hurt, and you eventually yank your arm away from her before she opens the backdoor exit. “Let’s go to that party.”
Mai sighs, leaning her back against the door and crosses her arms. “No way. Your mom wanted me to get you home before midnight,” she says as she glances at the time on her phone, “and it’s close to midnight.”
You roll your eyes. “I’m an adult now, I don’t have to adhere to a midnight curfew, like I’m fucking Cindarella.”
Mai raises an eyebrow at you from the profanity, recognizing the fact that it’s something you just forced into your vocabulary in a way that doesn’t suit you. “I already said no.”
“Take me or else I’m going to tell your mom about the nipple piercings you got last week.”
Mai hisses a sharp breath through her teeth. “You’re a bitch.”
“Take me,” you deadpan.
She tilts her head back so that it hits the metal of the door, and then she’s pushing her back against it to open it, the rush of cold wind from outside brushing past the two of you as she steps into the night and you follow her. “Oh my god, fine. But only for a little bit, and let’s get the lie straight right now–you had explosive diarrhea at the concert so I couldn’t take you home right away since you were incapacitated in the restrooms.”
“What? Why do I have to be the one with explosive diarrhea?” you ask, frown on your face but there’s a skip to your step as you follow her down the street to where she very poorly parallel parked and you open the passenger side door. She doesn’t bother answering you as she settles into the driver’s seat and her car roars to life with a few struggling turns of the key in ignition. 
“No drinking,” Mai says, voice strict with eyes locked on yours, and it’s the last thing she says before she starts driving. 
The house is just a few miles from the venue location, and Mai seems to have been there before since she turns the navigation off once she turns onto a street that has her driving switch to from perusal to more casual.  
Gojo is the one to greet you two at the door with wide eyes and a drink in his hand. You notice he’s changed out of his stage attire into something more casual, and likely in a rush too since his hair is disheveled, and you figured that you and Mai barely got here after they did. The surprised look on his face is quick to turn into a pleased one at the sight of the two of you. “Oh sweet you two actually came,” he comments, waving a hand for you two to come inside, “figured Kamo would’ve scared you off.”
You roll your eyes, “where is that jerk? I still have a few choice words for him.”
“Babes, let it go,” Mai sighs, “Not worth your time.”
“I concur,” Gojo says, “but, if you really want, he’s upstairs putting some of my stuff he borrowed for tonight’s show back into my room. You can…” he glances down at you once, “uh. Cuss him to death? Or whatever you can manage, I guess. But just don’t fuck on my bed, please. That’s my only rule.”
“Why do you sound like that’s a rule you’ve had to make often?” Mai scoffs, amused, while your cheeks feel hot. 
Gojo slumps his shoulders in some type of comical defeat. “I don’t wanna talk about it…” he mumbles, voice trailing off and turning on his heel to walk away while Mai follows him off with more follow-up questions he doesn’t seem receptive to answering. 
Your eyes glance over to the staircase, studying for a moment as loud party music fills your ears before making your way over and up the steps. As you head down the hallway leading into bedrooms, the floorboards creak until your sneakers even over soft carpet, and you hear soft sounds of clattering off to the left. There’s a door that’s half ajar leading into a warmly lit room, and you deftly peek your head through the opening.
Choso stands near the foot of the bed inside a messy room, black boxes and cases and wires surrounding him as he fumbles with unplugging some sort of audio station pad from another piece of hardware. His hand grips tightly around the thick black rubber coating of the wire, and you watch the flex of his knuckles that tense the veins running up his arm, sleeve of the shirt he’s worn all night stretching to accommodate the roll of muscle at his upper arm. With a solid yank, the chord releases itself before the wire whacks him straight in the face and he grumbles a fuck under his breath and he rubs the skin of his cheek, to which you can’t help but let out a small laugh at the sight of. 
His furrowed and frustrated expression turns into surprise as his eyes flicker to the entrance of the room. He stands up straight, and then there’s that bored expression again. “Oh. Shortcake. I thought I said you’ve got no business being here.”
“Yeah, about that, I’m waiting for you to apologize to me,” you say, leaning sideways against the doorframe as you cross your arms over your chest. 
He sighs, eyes moving away from yours to busy himself with the jungle of equipment he’s practically drowning in, as if he couldn’t be bothered by your presence right now. “Apologize for what?”
You make your way inside the room, foot pushing aside anything sprawled on the floor that’s in your way so you can continue to approach him, and you stop just when you’re just a step away. His gaze is still set to the ground as he’s crouched over slightly, but it shifts from the speaker he was toying with to the shape of your shoes instead.
“Apologize to me for being so crass,” you say, “after we had just met.”
He slowly straightens his spine, and you’re a little shocked to find the height that he has on you. His expression is curious, eyes narrowing slightly like he has you all figured out already, and it pisses you off. “Crass is such a prissy word to use, princess. Try ‘apologize to me for being a massive dick’ or something, and I’ll start to take you more seriously.”
“Why are you so rude?” you ask, anger building up inside of you all of a sudden. “I’ve barely met you, I don’t see how I could’ve upset you in any way. Yet you’ve already insulted me in multiple ways tonight, and it’s not a cool look for you. Trust me.”
“You’re the one that basically called me a crackhead,” he counters, but there’s no real offense behind it.
“Yeah, because you called me a kid,” you say, face tightening even further with anger, “even though I’m an adult.”
He sighs, closing his eyes in irritation, and tilts his head up to look at the ceiling briefly as his mouth hangs slightly open, all as if he’s running thin of the capacity to deal with this conversation, and then he looks back down at you again. “Shortcake, I didn’t call you a kid ‘cause of your age. I called you a kid ‘cause you’re just so–” he starts, eyes traveling down your body paired with a vague gesture of his hand towards all of you, and you find yourself shifting on your feet to stand a little more poised, “you just seem so innocent and clueless and, uh, forgive me, naive.”
“You’re the clueless one here if you still think negging a girl will get you anywhere with her,” you say, hands clenched in fists at your side now.
There’s a hint of a smirk on his face as he tilts his head at you, some of his dark hair falling over his forehead from the motion and a few strands weave with his eyelashes. “I’m not trying to get anywhere with you here, sweetheart, unless you’re wanting that,” he says, voice almost purred at the end as he steps over a guitar case on the floor to get closer to you.
You’re unable to make eye contact with him when he’s close and you can smell the earthy notes of his cologne, mixed with another scent that seems more distinctly him that makes your head spin. Your gaze takes in the sight of his forearm, the one with scattered tattoos trailing up his arm but not yet fully inked in. You wonder what he’s saving the space for, and what he’s willing to let in. 
When your gaze flickers up to his face again, you’re a little surprised to see his expression is softer. He suddenly holds his forearm up in front of you. Your eyes signal confusion to him, but he just keeps his arm up the same.
“You’ve been ogling my tattoos since we met,” he says, voice low, “if you’re curious, then just have a closer look.”
Your breath picks up in speed, and you hesitate for a moment but it’s true. You were curious. Your hands shakily hold onto his forearm to keep it still as you study the ink on his skin. You twist his arm as much as his joint allows, and he lets you handle him in any way you want, and you swear the snake tattooed on his skin moves as if it were alive. A dark blossoming rose with highlights of burgundy red catches your eye near his elbow, and you brush the back of your hand against it. Your fingers accidentally find his pulse at his wrist, and you find his heart is beating fast. 
You run a flat palm up his arm, the skin to skin contact feeling intimate, and your fingers stop when they tuck under the fabric of his sleeve. You feel the warmth and curve of his bicep, lightly wrapping your hand around it, and you blush at the sight of how small your hand looks on him.
“What does this one mean?” you ask, not meaning for it to come out as a whisper, but you feel like his answer is meant to be kept a secret. Your thumb swipes over small roman numerals permanently etched into him over muscle.
“It’s my dad’s military tag,” he responds, voice quiet like yours.
You tear your gaze away from his skin to look up at him, and you realize he’s closed enough distance between the two of you to where his face is just inches away. From the moment you looked up, his eyes have been on your lips, and his brow furrows as if he’s fighting some voice in his head that’s testing this harmony between the two of you in this moment. 
You swear he’s about to kiss you, since there could be no other explanation for the way he was looking at you, but instead he clears his throat and his face is first to distance from you before he pulls his arm back as well, and then a small step backwards. “Sorry,” he says, and he almost sounds awkward. It startles you, because it’s the first time he doesn’t sound cool or calm or collected.
“That-” you start, “...wait, what are you sorry for?”
His eyes widen, and you see the heaviness under them for a moment, “uhh…I’m actually not too sure.”
Your head feels clear now that he’s not close enough to breathe in, and you blink a few times as your annoyance from earlier resurfaces amidst the lingering energy he just broke between you two. “Start with ‘I’m sorry for calling you a kid, and then also just now calling you naive and clueless,’” you say, foot tapping impatiently, “and then, in front of all your bandmates, mocking the fact I’m not old enough to drink, and shamelessly traveling your eyes over me, and then–” your breath catches slightly as the words fail to leave your tongue, cheeks feeling hot, “and then saying–” you try again, but the thought only falls flat, and he’s taking a step closer to you again.
“And then saying that you’re old enough to fuck?” he asks, finishing your sentence for you, but there’s no remorse in his tone at all. 
His hand suddenly finds the small of your back and he pushes gently so you take a stumbled step towards him, like he needed to have you close to him again.  His lips brush against the top of your head, and the sensation sends a hot feeling through your chest. “Choso,” you reprimand him.
“Fuck,” he exhales, like in cynical disbelief, “my name sounds so sweet coming from you.”
It makes no sense, but you grip his shirt at his chest just to make contact with him, and you brave yourself to look up at him, wondering if he can see the hint of worry in your eyes, because he already feels like something you can’t resist.
His eyes are dark now, different from the tenderness in them before, and he’s freely studying the features of your face. “I don’t want to fuck you, Shortcake, if that’s what you’re worried about. You’re a little too good for me to do something like that.”
His words say one thing while his eyes say another, his arm wrapping around your waist to keep you close, and you’re astonished at how little he cares about the clear contradiction in his words from the way he holds you. His gaze slowly travels down from your eyes to your lips.
“What about–” you start, heart beating fast in your chest as you see the glimmer of the silver ring pierced through his lip. You bite back the words.
But he reads your mind, because his head dips down towards yours and he captures your lips in his, slow and sweet at first before pressing more firmly, more decisively with both hands flying to hold your waist. A moan muffles in your throat at the sensation of his bare fingers coyly traveling under the hem of your shirt, and you can’t help but slide your arms up over his shoulders, locking them behind his neck to pull him down closer to you, and he sighs in response as he presses your hips flush against him. The chill metal of his lip ring has the plush of your bottom lip tingling cold, and when his tongue swipes across to warm it for you, your mouth opens with ease. You taste spearmint on his tongue, and his lips curve against yours in what feels like an amused smile, large hands now slid so far up your shirt that his fingers reach the band of your bra.
“Hey, Cho, do you know where–”
The trill of a feminine voice in the air cuts through harshly, and he pulls his lips from yours but not without a moment of reluctance. You two turn your head to the door, and you see Sana standing there, eyes wide and blinking as she takes in the sight of the two of you standing in what feels like a guilty proximity from how her eyes silently curse you. 
You can only manage an awkward laugh, fist shoving against Choso’s shoulder but his hands are still placed firmly on the curve over your lower back, dangerously close to the plush of your ass, and your hips are practically pinned to him while you do all you can to lean your upper body away. “Oh–sorry, this…is not what it looks like–”
“I…” Sana starts, and you can see the hurt in her expression, but she quickly corrects it, “Oh! Ah, was just lookin’ for Cho here,” she says, making her way into the room, and a harsh shove of your fist against Choso’s chest finally has him relenting to let you go. Your posture immediately stiffens when she approaches Choso’s side, and she playfully pushes his arm but the effort is weak. “Kissing girls in Satoru’s room is seriously not a good idea, Cho. That freak probably has cameras in here to make sure people don’t bump uglies in his room again after that New Year’s party.” 
Choso gives her a pointed look, like he wasn’t caught up on that drama, but you’re just standing there with your eyes flicking between the familiarity of the two people standing in front of you. Why wasn’t Sana jealous? She was looking at you ten seconds ago like she was a whole lot of jealous. 
“What are you looking for?” Choso asks her, and she holds her red plastic solo cup with her drink in it out for him to hold as she crouches down to the floor to sift through the equipment now surrounding the three of you.
“My lucky mic,” she says, “Gojo said it’d be here.” There’s a hint of something in her voice, something that mirrors betrayal if you’re perceptive enough. 
You watch Choso lick his lips once, eyes darting to you, before he’s crouching down too to help her look. “For something that allegedly means a lot to you, you sure do a shit job at looking out for it,” he comments with a sigh before pulling out a black case from under three other ones and handing it to her. “It’s here.” 
“I’m–” you say, taking a step back and almost tripping over a guitar case, “I’m, um, going to head downstairs. Mai is probably looking for me.”
Choso raises an eyebrow at you from where he’s still crouched down next to Sana, and he’s about to speak when Sana cuts him off.
“Okay. Bye,” she says, still rummaging through things mindlessly even though she had already been given what she was looking for.
Choso makes a move to stand up, like he wants to see you out the door, but Sana’s hand grabs him by his forearm, eyes still not meeting his, and there’s a beat of confusion in his eyes as he studies the side of her face. But you know what sort of look she probably has in her eyes right now, and you know only because you’re also a girl, and all girls know what it’s like when a guy you love doesn’t want you in the way that you want him. All you can do at this moment is feel sorry for her.
The atmosphere in the room begins to suffocate, and you head out of the door in a rush. 
.
.
.
present day. summer.
“He kissed ya the day he met ya? Hmph! That wouldn’t fly with me,” the man seated beside you says, his grip on the steering wheel tightening as he shifts slightly in his seat to puff his chest out. 
“Hmm,” you hum as you look out the window wistfully, memories that you had locked up for so many years opened like a pandora box that fills your chest with warmth but has your fingers trembling with anxiety because you know how it all ends. “You wouldn’t…let a man kiss you on the first day he met you?”
The driver humors you with a hearty laugh from his chest, at least. “Not talkin’ about it that way, darlin’. I’m talkin’ about my daughters. I’ve got two girls of my own. A man should keep his hands to himself the first time he meets a lady. At least that’s what I’ve taught ‘em.”
There’s a small smile that tugs at your lips at his words, the love he has for his daughters heard clearly through his strict tone. You left out a lot of the details that probably would’ve angered him on your behalf even more, so the fact he still ended up getting worked up about it has you a little amused and reflective at the same time. “How old are your daughters?” you ask, tucking strands of your hair behind your ear, watching the wind-rustled plains of grass that you two have been driving by for a while now.
“They’re a little younger than you,” he comments, his expression now a bit more serious, “one just graduated from college, she’s startin’ more school in the city soon, and the other’s still in highschool. She’s turning sixteen next week.”
“Ah, sixteen,” you muse, “that’s a confusing age.”
“You got that right,” he gruffs, “the other day, she called me on my way home from work to bring some drink called a boba. Fifty-two years of life and I never even knew there was a damn thing called a boba! Why would anyone want swirlin’ stuff in their drink?! Anyways, the shop got her order wrong, and when I brought it home, she refused to drink it, called me the worst dad ever, then stormed upstairs to slam the door on her room. I turn to my wife, and she’s shakin’ her head at me like I’m the one that did something wrong!”
You laugh, then press your lips into a smile. “I’d have to agree with her on that,” you joke, and he lets out another disgruntled noise that has you laughing again. 
“Yeah, yeah, I’ve lived with my wife and those two girls for over two decades,” he sighs. “I’m used to it by now. All three are equally pains in my ass, but I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
Your smile drops a little as you look at him more contemplatively. There’s a glimmer in his eyes as he speaks, and you realize it’s familiar, but the answer of where you’ve seen it before fails to arrive.
“My youngest,” he starts again, “she’s been listenin’ to really loud music lately.” He presses one of the buttons underneath the AC vents, static noises coming to life before he changes the output to bluetooth. “My wife says it’s some sort of phase, but I’m not likin’ the music. Always sounding tempered and inappropriate.” He plays a song from his phone paired to the car, speakers flowing with music, and a chill runs down your spine the moment the first few notes fill your ears. A song so painfully familiar, so connected to your soul it’s as if your heart still keeps time with it to this day. 
“See what I’m talkin’ about?” the man says, “Lots of words about skin and cigarettes.” With a shake of his head, he lowers the volume. “She’s obsessed with this band, it’s probably a band similar to your old lover’s from the sound of it. She’s got posters of ‘em up on the wall, and she took the picture of us on our first fishing trip together out of the picture frame on her desk and replaced it with this man. This silly-lookin’ white-haired man that always looks like he’s just pretending he knows how to play a guitar. Hmph! She keeps saying ‘dad, I wanna go to their concert!’ There’s no way in hell I’m allowing that.”
You stare down at your lap, brow furrowed from the realization flashing through your head, and your thumb nervously passes over the skin of your other hand. In your periphery, you see him glance over at you once, and he sighs before stopping the music and speaking up again.
“It’s fine,” he says, “my youngest got her sister into the same band, and she likes one of the other ones. Plays bass. He’s too rough-lookin’ for my daughter. Arms covered in tattoos, he’s even got some on his face! She keeps dreamin’ about havin’ him for a boyfriend, but if she brought that home, there’s no way I’d approve. I’d scare him off with my rifle.”
Your heart is beating fast in your chest, and you realize what a small world it is. Or, you realize just how big Choso’s world must be now. So much bigger than he or any of the other members of his band could’ve ever imagined. For once in a lifetime, so rare and pure, are dreams that are fully realized. 
“Gosh,” you respond when you realize you’ve been lost in your own revelations for too long, “that’s an…extreme response. You sound like my father, though.”
“Hm,” he responds, “I’m sure. Did your father approve of this lover of yours? The one that’s makin’ moves on you so fast and too soon?”
You lean back in your seat with your head hitting the headrest. It’s been years since you’ve felt like you’re being lectured or reprimanded for anything, but the feeling comes back to you at this moment as if no time had passed at all. No matter how old you get, you’ll never forget how humbling the feeling was when you thought you knew everything at eighteen, just to look back and realize you didn’t have a single clue.
You sigh. “No. He didn’t approve. Far from it.”
.
.
.
seven years ago. autumn.
chapter 2. the juvenile & the delinquent.
[to be continued]
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a/n. eeeeeppp thank you very much for reading n supporting my new fic!! i hope you enjoyed :') still a lot more to uncover n unpack hahah i'm so nervous to start a new fic but i'm also very excited!!! i love choso sm but i also love nanami so this is gonna be interesting to write. also TYSM to everyone that wanted to be on taglist for this omg your support means the world to meeee. love you all sm.
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taglist: @joemama-2 @sweetpo1son @lilluna12 @polarbvnny @4y3sh4 @sedona-the-l0bster @horisdope @ilovenana88 @thexmistress @atsushirolll @flvrrg0d @strawnanamilk @nighttwingg @indieotterxoxo @pirana10 @bakuhoethotski @tvdumarvelhpsimp @lavender-hvze @whereflowerswenttodie @alwaysfreakingout @kaitoluver @3xv5s @wrenabbadon @erwinslut @winsga18 @ynishalee @yungbloode
love u all so much!!
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jeonginsleftcheek · 7 months ago
Text
Yes, master
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pairing: lee felix x afab!reader
word count: 3k
description: you and your boyfriend are youtubers who share cute prank videos on youtube. one day you decide to prank him with a maid outfit, and it ends just how you intended.
genre: smut, fluff
warning/s: use of master, spanking, lots of dirty talk, degradation & praising, reader is called slut, unprotected p in v (don't do it)
a/n: inspired by renjie&binbin on yt, go check them out, they're adorable. also yes another felix scenario, what can i say he inspires me hehe
Your outfit was finally here. You had ordered it on the internet 2 weeks ago when you planned out the next prank for your dear boyfriend. You couldn't be more excited.
Both of you loved playing harmless jokes on each other, and most of the pranks you did had the goal of riling each other up for later. Every time you turned off the camera, you would be all over each other, sometimes you'd even leave it on and later watch the footage together, careful to cut out the sexual part before posting the video online. You kept all the spicy parts to yourselves, it was somewhat of a private collection of yours.
You had quite a good following of loyal fans who watched you grow with each other through the last 6 years of your relationship. Everything was filmed, not only the pranks, but vlogs of your travel adventures, your move to a bigger apartment, you getting a promotion at your work etc. Both of you loved having sort of an online diary of your memories and loved sharing your good vibes with other people.
People always viewed you two as two cutie pies, yes, your pranks were suggestive but no one could guess how freaky both of you actually are. Felix especially was seen as this sweet innocent sunshine boy but you knew better. And that's why you couldn't wait to provoke him with that maid outfit you ordered.
The next morning, you quietly slipped out of bed, having to cautiously roll out of Felix's arms cause he always clung onto you like a koala while you slept. His brows furrowed and you gently pushed your pillow between his arms so it would replace you. You tiptoed to the bathroom, after grabbing the maid dress you hid in the closet last night. You got ready and hurried downstairs to make breakfast before your boyfriend wakes up.
When you were done, you ofcourse went to set up the cameras. One was above the bed, and you had to basically do gymnastics quietly just so you can set it up without waking Felix up. You also set up two other ones in different corners of the room.
"Hi guys! It's morning and Felix is still sleeping."- you say to the one of the cameras in the corner, moving your body as you scrunch your face up and point at your boyfriend's sleeping form behind you. "Sleepy head."- you giggle quietly.
"As you can see, I'm wearing a maid outfit. I'm going to prank him or rather surprise him today with serving him dressed like this all day."- you announce. "I'm also gonna call him master. Let's see how he reacts."
Satisfied with the intro, you go back downstairs to grab the tray with breakfast that you prepared. You set it aside on the night stand, and sit on the bed next to Felix.
"Lixie, wake up."- you whisper quietly, caressing his hair and winking at the camera above you.
"Mhm."- he grunts, eyes still closed.
"Lixieeeee. Baby. I have something for you."- you giggle as you continue carding your fingers through his soft hair.
"Mm. What?"- he turns to you and finally blinks his eyes open. He squints at first, the expression on his face that of confusion. He didn't register your outfit yet. You wait for him to rub the sleepiness out of his eyes.
"Oh."- his eyes widden when he takes in your appearance. You were sitting back on your feet, a skimpy maid dress revealing your plush thighs and giving you the perfect amount of cleavage.
"What're you wearing?"- he asks, blood rushing downwards, but then he notices the camera placed perfectly above his face, he groans and starts chuckling.
"I'm here to serve you, master. I made you breakfast."- you say and start giggling with him because that coming out of your mouth at this moment is funny to the both of you.
"Oh my god, you're crazy."- he laughs, his face red as he pulls the blanket up to his neck. "Wait."- he adds, his hand sneaking out from under the blanket and landing on your thigh.
"Are you wearing anything under this?"- he smirks, lifting up on his elbows and sliding his hand towards the hem of your dress.
"Felix!"- you squeal pointing at the camera and he laughs.
"What? We can cut it out later."- he chuckles, making a motion towards the camera.
"Stop it."- you laugh slapping his hands away. He groans again, smacking his head on the pillow.
"Come on, eat your breakfast."- you say. He sits up and looks right between your legs, wiggling his eyebrows at you suggestively.
"The food I made. With love. For my master."- you bat your eyelashes at him, you've never called him that before today but even though he was laughing at it because of the camera, you could see how it affected him.
"Ask nicely, hm?"- he says and there's a shiver running down your spine.
"Please, master?"- you bite your lip.
"Alright, when my baby put in such an effort."- he smirks and you chuckle at him. He grabs the tray but before he can put any food in his mouth, you grab the fork and bring it to his lips.
"Are you gonna feed me?"- he chuckles.
"Well yes. My master doesn't have to do anything. Today is the day I serve you master."- as you keep talking, his eyes are getting darker and your cunt is getting wetter. For some reason, you liked calling him that and liked seeing his reactions. You caught even the smallest ones, like his eyebrow twitching every time you said the word 'master'.
His hands kept wandering to your thighs as you fed him and you had to constantly remind him that the cameras were on even though you were pressing your thighs together. And he knew. You were getting needy too but he wanted to tease you too, it was one of his favorite things to do anyways.
So when you moved to the bathroom, carrying a camera with you, you grabbed his toothbrush and he chuckled again. He looked a bit flustered when he realized you actually wanted to brush his teeth.
"Y/n, that's sweet of you but I can do it on my own."- he chuckled, his hands coming up to hug himself as his face got redder. He glanced at the camera and you laughed, feeling shy suddenly.
"Please, let me do it. Master."
He couldn't say no. Both of you were trying not to burst out into laughter as you attempted to brush his teeth. It got too messy so he just grabbed the toothbrush and continued on his own as you playfully pouted at him.
"I'll help you wash your hair. Please, master?"- you ask when he's done.
"Sure, that'd be nice."- he chuckles.
You adjust the camera so the viewers can look at you both from the side. You put a towel on the sink so he can lean his head down, and he chuckles again, eyes trailing to the camera. You start getting his hair wet and Felix looks at the viewfinder, finding a blind spot where no one could see his wandering hand.
You almost jump out of your skin when you feel his hand on the back of your thigh but you opt to act like nothing is happening. Felix looks up at you innocently as you grab the shampoo. His hand slowly travels up, fingertips tickling your sensitive skin. His fingers come into contact with a wet patch that formed on the thin lacy panties you wore under your maid dress.
Your hands tremble and you almost drop the bottle of shampoo on his head, but for the sake of entertainment you ignore his hand and start joking around. He jokes back with you, but you can feel his fingertips pressing into your cunt, teasing you as he slowly runs them over it then to your clit, making little circular motions into it before sliding his fingers down your lips again. You let out a shaky breath and clear your throat to cover it up.
You start rinsing his hair out, and he decides to move your panties to the side just enough to uncover your hole before he pushes one finger between your folds. Your knees buckle but you chuckle nervously as he eyes you, his eyes darkened with lust but there's still an innocent smile on his face. If only the viewers knew.
You stay perfectly still, only spreading your legs a bit so he can fuck into you deeper. He's moving slow, torturing you but you know you brought that on yourself. As you grab another towel to dry his hair, he presses his thumb into your clit and pushes his middle finger deeper into you making you gasp.
"What's wrong, darling?"- Felix grins at you.
"N-nothing."- you shake your head glancing at the camera as you dry his hair. He pulls his finger out, moving his hand away from you much to your disappointment but you had to go get the hair dryer. You still need some content for your video. So you stand between his legs and dry his hair, his hands running up and down the back of your knees and thighs as you both continue chuckling and talking like he didn't just pull his finger out of your cunt. You're becoming desperate now and you can't wait to film the outro so you can turn off the camera and let your boyfriend fuck you.
But Felix had other plans for you. As soon as you walk back into the room, you put the camera down so you can film an outro together but before you can even start talking your boyfriend grabs your face and crashes his lips into yours.
"Lix-" - your voice is muffled as he kisses you harder and forces his tongue inside, making you moan into his lips. You grip onto his arms and try to pry him away from you.
"L-Lixie we didn't film an outro."- you heave, trying to catch a breath after he stole it from you.
"Oh we're filming it now, sweets."- he smirks at the camera and then looks back at you.
"You said you'd serve me all day. As far as I know it's not even noon so you're not done yet."- Felix says and he's rarely so dominant with you. It makes you tingle with anticipation.
"Get on your knees and serve me then."- he says, his voice low.
You look at him for a moment but there's nothing but dark lust in his eyes so you know better than to not obey. You slowly fall down to your knees as he pulls his pants and boxers down.
"And it's master for you, not Lixie, okay?"- he adds, his cock now inches away from your face, you lick your lips and nod fast.
"Words."- he warns, slapping your cheek with his hard cock and you whimper.
"Mm yes master."- you say and he smirks again.
"Open your pretty mouth for me."- he orders and you do as you're told, opening wide for him and he slowly pushes his cock in. You glance at the camera and see yourself in the viewfinder, your mouth stuffed full of your boyfriend's pretty cock.
You moan around him and Felix tangles his fingers in your hair.
"You look so pretty like this. Come on darling, show everyone how desperate you are for my cock."- he grips your hair pushing in deeper and you choke a little, tears forming in your eyes and arousal pooling on your panties. You start bobbing your head, taking as much as you can and jerking off the rest with your hand. Felix keeps grunting and holding your head in place so you don't dare lift off of him.
"Mm everyone will know how you're such a slut for me, darling."- your boyfriend coos at you and you feel like people are actually watching you do this live even though you know they aren't. It makes you feel so embarassed but so aroused at the same time, the thought of people knowing who you belonged to and whose cock you were drunk on. Your throat relaxed a little and you breathed deep through your nose as you slid down on Felix's cock, his tip hitting the back of your throat and your nose touching his navel.
"Fuck baby!"- he grips your hair hard, his legs shaking. "You're gonna make me come"- he hisses and pulls you off, a string of saliva between you and his hard cock.
He smirks at your expression, turning your face to the camera.
"She looks so fucked out and I haven't even touched her pussy"- Felix talks like he's talking to your viewers and a wave of hotness washes over you.
"Please."- you whimper.
"Please what?"- he looks down at you darkly.
"I need you inside me. Please master! I'll do anything!"- you beg on the verge of tears, your pussy aching for him.
"Anything?"- he lifts his eyebrow and you nod fervently.
"Oh, we'll explore that."- he smirks. "Face the camera."- he adds and you do as you're told, your heart beating fast in anticipation.
"Get on all fours, darling."- Felix orders and you do so, leaning down on your hands, your ass up in the air and legs spread for him. Usually, he takes his time with you especially with his tongue and fingers, he enjoys eating you out maybe even more than you do. But, today he's had enough of your teasing, the maid dress driving him more insane than anything you've ever worn for him.
You feel him massage your wet pussy with the tip of his rock hard cock and you melt instantly, leaning back to feel him more.
"Is this what you want, hm?"- he teases a little more.
"Please please please!"- you whine, pushing your ass into him.
"Fuck!"- he curses as he pushes his length in, his eyes rolling back as your cunt sucks him in fast, since you were so wet and needy.
You moan loudly at the familiar stretch, your boyfriend's cock fitting snuggly inside the space made only for him.
"So tight for me."- Felix whimpers.
He grips your hips and starts fucking you semi-fast and you start moaning immediately, scratching at the wooden floor beneath you.
"You want a good outro baby? How about this, hm? Letting everyone see how dumb you are on my cock."- Felix growls, pounding harder into you.
"M-master"- you moan, unable to form any coherent sentence with the force of his hips on your ass and his thick cock splitting you apart.
"Look at you."- he coos grabbing your hair and pulling your head back harshly so you can see yourself in the viewfinder.
"Taking it so well. Such a good girl. Made to be fucked like this."- he says lowly. Your mind buzzes along with your whole body and you think you've never came this fast or this hard.
Felix whines at the feeling of your pussy clenching around him.
"You came already? So desperate. So pathetic." - he chuckles at you, spanking your ass. You whimper and bite down on your arm to stop yourself from screaming at his words and his relentless hips.
"You like when I talk to you like this?"- he asks and you whimper and nod fast.
"Use your words!"- your boyfriend spanks you harder.
"Yes, yes master!"
"You like when I tell you that you were made just for this? To be fucked dumb on my cock. Just my little play toy."- he talks as he fucks you harder, the tip of his cock hitting that sweet spot inside you every time he pushes in.
"Mm yes master"- you whine, your mind cloudy.
"Made to please me. My little slut"- he chuckles darkly pulling on your hair and you explode all over his cock again.
"M-master!"- you cry out as he helps you ride your high. "I can't take anymore."
"Yes you can. One more. For me. Come on baby, you can come for me one more time."- Felix coos at you, hovering over you and caressing your hair, his hips less brutal but still moving deep inside you, abusing that sweet spot.
"I- I can't master please"- you whimper, but you know you're close and you want to obey him.
His hand is between your legs, fingers pressing into your clit as he flicks it and starts fucking you faster again.
"Oh my god"- you whimper, pushing back into him, the pleasure in the pain of overstimulation driving you wild.
"Yeah just like that baby. Fuck yourself on my cock."- Felix moans behind you, his hips stuttering and you know he's close too.
You keep pushing back into him in the same pace he's fucking you in, and it doesn't take long for you to be on the edge again. He knows when your pussy clenches around him deliciously.
"Come for me darling"- he says, gripping your hair and you do. But this time you squirt making him pull out and whimper as you coat him with your juices. Felix watches it slide down your thighs as he jerks off once, twice before he explodes, hot spurts of cum painting your ass and the back of your thighs, mixing with your arousal.
"Fuck"- he groans as you breathe hard. He hovers over you, moving your hair out of your face gently.
"Are you okay, baby?"- he asks, a sweet smile on his face, contrast to the dark look he was giving you just a few moments ago.
"More than okay. That was really hot."- you turn a little and he scoops you up in his arms, pulling you into his lap, not caring about the mess you both made.
"I agree. How about next time I wear the maid dress for you?"- he looks at you with big innocent eyes, the look everyone's familiar with but only you know the meaning of.
"I think that's a wonderful idea."- you chuckle and lean in to kiss his pretty lips.
"Mhm. But since I'm not done with you yet... how about you lay down on the bed and spread your legs for me?"
"Yes, master."
576 notes · View notes
drvscarlett · 8 months ago
Text
About You Pt2
Sebastian Vettel x Webber!Reader
Summary: Everyone knows about the history of Sebastian Vettel and Mark Webber. But there's a well kept story within the paddock about Sebastian Vettel and another Webber. This is that story.
A/N: were in the 2009 season. i also grabbed some ideas from a film quote so if you notice that, hello hehe. hope you enjoy, let me know your comments
About You Series: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7
Taglist: @spideybv28 @randomcuboidshape @mehrmonga @casperlikej @cliosunshine @randomgirlnumber-13 @sugyomama
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2009, Albert Park
Moving from Toro Rosso to Red Bull has been the source of excitement of Sebastian ever since he signed the contract last December. He was excited to work with a bigger team and it opened up better opportunities for a championship which is why he feels really giddy walking to Albert Park.
"Seems like a good year for a championship?"Christian greeted Sebastian.
"I'm looking forward to that, the car feels nice"Sebastian agreed.
When the two walked to the garage, they immediately saw the Webber siblings discussing with some of the mechanics. Mark immediately waved at Sebastian.
Sebastian can tell that their dynamics improved since it was announced that they will be teammates. They spent a lot of time together in Milton Keynes so they found each other tolerable. It was surprising that now he feels a lot more closer to Mark than to Y/N.
He was actually expecting her to be around when they said Mark will be around Milton Keynes but the female Webber never showed up. Mark says that Y/N has been taking some time off since she will be busy during the season. Sebastian thinks he might be the reason why she has been absent so he felt a little relieve to see her.
"Excited for the first race of the season?" Y/N asked.
"The car seems alright, I think we can bring some good points in"Sebastian replied.
"We're gonna bring in a challenge this year, I can feel that we can compete for the drivers and constructors championship this year"Mark added
"How about Brawn, do you think they'll be a challenge?"Y/N wondered.
Sebastian heard about the team during the winter break. It was sort of a crazy story about how everything happened. He never saw Jenson or Rubens as a threat so he thinks that they might be an okay team that he doesn't have to worry about.
"They are a new team, I'm sure they won't be a threat" famous last words.
Brawn GP turns out to be a slight threat. Sebastian calls it a slight threat since this was only the first race and maybe its just their luck that they managed to pull away. They have to see how they perform in the next few races.
It was quite a bummer that Red Bull was unable to bring any points. It frustrated him heavily since he started 3rd and managed to stay 2nd the whole race until that unfortunate collision with Kubica that ruined his race.
Mark managed to finish the race but he finished 13th. Still out of the points.
As Sebastian was replaying the whole thing in his hotel room, he heard soft knocks at his door. He didn't remember ordering anything from room service so he was a bit confused as he headed to open the door.
"Hi Seb" it was Y/N "I was sent here by Mark to ask you if you want to go out and eat. You are in Australia and our family is from Australia and it will be a little bit rude if we didn't treat you out in Australia"
"That's too many Australia in one sentence"
"Have dinner with us and the family?"she simplifies "Please?"
There was not much to do anyway, Seb thinks so he accepted the offer. It might also be a good start to rekindle the friendship since its been a while since the two spoke with each other.
"You're driving?"Sebastian asked
"Of course, what kind of host am I if I'm going to make you drive"
The drive was reminiscent of Sebastian's memory when they were in Germany. Only that the view is more of beaches rather than the greens and the cold of Europe.
"I heard stories about you and Mark, it seems that you two are getting along quite well"Y/N opened up the conversation
"Oh he talks about me?"
"Well as his assistant, I have to ask about his work dynamics so yeah you have been a talking point of our conversation"
"That's nice"Sebastian smiles "How is life treating you? I didn't see you in Milton Keynes"
She lets out a heavy sigh and Sebastian could tell that there is a certain tiredness in her eyes. Maybe its true what Mark said that Y/N is actually drained from a season of F1.
"I just have to get away. A lot of pressure to deliver"
Sebastian understands that. Its probably the reason why he also tried to be understanding with Mark's situation as well. He knows that at the end of the day, the sports was brutal in one way or another. Everyone eventually gets that pressure to deliver.
"Let's not talk about f1, lets just talk about basic life things" Sebastian steered the conversation.
There was a smile gracing both of their faces because its just Sebastian and Y/N again. No last names, no championships, just them.
2009, Sepang International Circuit
"I hate wet races" Y/N confirms.
She doesn't get why everyone gets a bit excited with wet racing but she can't find how this is enjoyable for some people. Isn't the thrill of racing beyond speed limit exciting enough for them? Now they even want to race under dangerous weather conditions.
"It test your skills as a driver" Sebastian defended "Back me up here Mark"
"You're on your own Seb"was the reply of the older Webber. He did not want to take side with anyone.
The trio has been sitting at the garage waiting for the race to start. There was still 20 minutes left and Y/N has been stressing about how the dark clouds are looming over. She thinks it may start under dry conditions then go to wet in a snap.
"You can test your skills by overtaking and setting the fastest lap" Y/N noted
"Its all about strategy and taking risks"Sebastian assured.
"You better make sure that the both of you finish the race"
"No promises, Seb might hit me again"Mark joked
"Oh c'mon, I said I was sorry about that"
True enough to Y/N's prediction, the race started on the dry conditions then it ended up to be a wet race. Y/N had her fair share of wet races but this was the most terrifying for her opinion. There were puddles and the drivers can't see a thing with the rain blocking their vision.
It gotten so bad that Y/N actually went out of the driver's room to check on the status of the drivers.
"Aren't they red flagging the race?"she asked one of the mechanics
"There is still nothing from the stewards but Mark is also insisting that the race should be stopped"
Y/N was glad that she wasn't the only sane Webber around.
Just then there was a crash on screen and the weather made it very difficult for them to decipher which car spun but it was for sure a Red Bull. Y/N felt a bit comforted that it just spun without hitting anyone or anything.
"Its confirmed, that is Seb's car"
"Safety car for the lap"
"Webber is gonna ask to stop the race"
There was a flurry of emotions inside the garage. The race was stopped at lap 33 and there was the question if they will wait for it to restart or is it called off completely.
"I'm in 15th, this is not good"Sebastian was already groaning. He missed out on the points again by a big margin.
"Hey 15th is okay than dnf or being hospitalized"
Knowing Sebastian, Y/N knew he wanted to do well and it didn't seem like it was going to how Sebastian had it in his mind earlier this year. She gave him a comforting pat.
"Do you want some ice cream?"she asked
Sebastian looked at her as if she grew two heads "In this cold weather? You are asking for ice cream?"
"Ice cream heals people's boo boo" Y/N shrugged "Besides Kimi made me hungry for ice cream"
"You are crazy" Sebastian started "But c'mon lets go get some ice cream"
2009, Circuit de Catalunya
Mark: Can you see me before qualis at the back of the garage Mark: need your help, please
Sebastian never received any urgent texts from Mark so he must say that his curiosity is piqued by it. He immediately set out to meet Mark in the designated location.
"You need me?"Sebastian asked.
"Sebastian, just the person I needed" Mark seems elated to see him "Listen I need you to do me a favor"
"Okay as long as I don't have to hide a body"
"What?"
"Nevermind that. It was a joke Mark"Sebastian wanted to facepalm himself. Mark never seems to understand his humor especially when he was too excited with things.
"So May 15 is coming up. I need your help to distract my sister and maybe tour her around Spain while we do some preparation at the hotel. I just need your help to distract her for like 3-4 hours"Mark explained.
"15th?What's on the 15th?"
Sebastian was pretty sure that there was no race or other commitments that is happening on the 15th. He tries to rack his head for any important dates on the 15th but he can't remember a thing. Meanwhile, Mark looked offended that Sebastian didn't know the significance of May 15.
"Its Y/N's birthday"Mark answered.
Oh. Now that Sebastian thinks about it, Y/N never told her birthday. He felt like an idiot after realizing how they spend a lot of time together but he still haven't asked her about her birth date. But now that he knows, he makes a mental note of it.
"Okay. I think I can do that. Leave it to me"
"Thanks Seb, I owe you big time"
Seb: Are you still here at the 15th? Y/N: Why are you asking? Seb: I'm feeling adventurous. What do you say about getting lost in spain? Y/N: hmm sounds nice. Count me in.
"How long till we get there"Y/N asked.
They have driven for quite some time already and Sebastian promised that this place will be worth the wait. Sebastian will not admit it but maybe he got a little bit of lost in directions for the past 20 minutes and he is just starting to get the hang of the destination right now.
"Just a few minutes more" Sebastian assured. He can already see the spires of the building so he felt a sigh of relief escape.
"We were lost a while ago, aren't we?"
Sebastian just give out a grin as he continues to drive closer to the place. He stopped at the designated parking lot and unlocked the door.
"Adventure awaits Miss Y/N, welcome to La Sagrada Familia"Sebastian introduced.
When Sebastian was looking for a place to go, the La Sagrada Familia was one of the top hit. Sebastian didn't even consider if she is religious or what but he thinks she can appreciate the reminder that this architecture is still a work in progress and it has managed to endure a lot throughout the years of construction.
"This is beautiful" was her response.
"They say that this will be the most beautiful form of apology when it is finished"Sebastian informed "This was built for the city's sins"
"I beg to disagree"Y/N replied.
It was now Sebastian's turn to be curious.
"I think this is the grandest gesture of someone's love"Y/N elaborated "This went on for years, decades, centuries-they did not stop loving Barcelona that they continue working so that the city will be forgiven"
It was a pretty analogy in Sebastian's mind. He felt like no amount of his research could compare with that realization.
If the outside of the cathedral looks majestic, the inside is beyond what they could imagine. The both of them let out a small woah as they stepped foot into the church.
"You know you can make three wishes when its your first time to enter a church, they say it comes true when you do that"Y/N mentioned "You wanna give it a go?"
Sebastian nodded and he noticed how Y/N immediately closed her eyes.
'A world drivers championship. Happiness. Y/N receiving her wish' was what Sebastian prayed for.
He takes out a peek and Y/N was still in her own solemn state. Sebastian wonders what is it that she wishes for and he hopes that this three wishes thing works. He really wanted Y/N to fulfill her wishes, it will make him extremely happy.
"What did you wish for Y/N"
"Safe races, World Peace, and points for you and Mark" she answered
"Oh c'mon, you don't have things about yourself. Don't you have any personal wishes? Like your own goals or your own things?"Sebastian quizzed
Y/N knew deep down that she wanted something but she knew that saying it at the moment might not be ideal. But heaven knows, she prayed for Sebastian Vettel to stay in her life.
2009, Nürburgring
Y/N didn't mind that she was in heels, she was running as fast as she could to parc ferme. The moment that the last lap started and Mark was still leading, she immediately headed straight to the destination. Their father was already at the pits waiting with the signboard.
There was certainly a mix of emotions. Y/N's mind reel back to how Mark started pole and then had an incident with Hamilton at the start of the race. It caused him to have a penalty which lessens his chances of winning but Mark was in for a mega-drive. He managed to regain all the places that he lost from the penalty and here he is leading the Grand Prix.
Y/N felt her ears ringing as the crowd roars as the chequered flag appeared. Every speaker was blaring out the obvious, this is Mark Webber's first win in Formula 1.
People are starting to line up near the barricades. Y/N doesn't care if she was being pushed but she will be the first one to meet her brother and congratulate him once he gets out of the car.
"YOU DID IT! YOU ABSOLUTELY CRUSHED IT" Y/N screamed to Mark.
Mark did not miss his sister and immediately hugged her tight. He kept on repeating his thanks for her support and for not giving up on him. Y/N could only choke on a sob with the cameras flashing the emotional sibling moment that they shared.
"Congratulations Mark"Sebastian appeared next to him and Mark gave him a hug.
It was a happy day for the Red Bull team for securing double podiums. The whole Red Bull team cannot contain their happiness as the two walked to their podium spots. It is certainly a day that warrants a much needed night out.
So fast forward and Red Bull rented out a club to celebrate the victory of today. Y/N was certain that she deserved to let loose a little with the events that happened today.
Shots after shots, Y/N managed to drink everything up until the room started to feel a little bit wavy. It was a good thing that Sebastian has not been much of a party animal, he knew that this was Mark's time to celebrate so he won't be taking too much of a spotlight.
"You are seriously wasted, you should stop drinking now" Sebastian said, catching Y/N before she could trip in her heels.
"my brother won, can't you believe ittttt"her words are slurred.
"Yep, I'm getting you water and were going back to the hotel"
"NOOOOOO"
But Sebastian has already carried her out of the club. Sebastian knew that there are probably much more people wasted there but Sebastian was focused on Y/N. She was the reason why Sebastian decided to sober up the entire night. Knowing that Mark will be celebrating, no one will take care of Y/N.
Sebastian wanted to take care of her.
The trip to the hotel was smooth as Y/N was asleep at the car. Sebastian was giggling when he picked her up and she started rambling about how there are different kinds of beautiful in formula 1.
"But you know what's the most beautiful thing in f1 that I have seen?" she asked "Its the time where I saw Sebastian Vettel test the car"
Sebastian got curious, he didn't know that Y/N was around when he tested the car.
"And it was so dreamy. There was this beauty about him and you know he is so passionate. He isn't a paid driver or maybe he is but damnnnn the way he raced and the way he loved the wheels"Y/N rambles on.
It feels illegal for Sebastian to be hearing this and he knows he should not take advantage of Y/N's truthful drunkness to hear what she thinks about him. But somehow, Sebastian stayed with her. He tucked her in the bed and left a glass of water at the bedside table.
"Did you know Sebastian Vettel is the prettiest boy ever. He is so pretty like how the sun is so pretty to the plants" Sebastian also laughed at the comparison. Y/N was really really drunk.
"I like Sebastian"
"What?" was Sebastian's shocked question.
"I like sebastian, what sue me? I think he is a pretty pretty boy"
Sebastian feels like his heart is pounding but he has to stay cool. She is drunk right now and she might not be aware of the things she is saying.
"You get some rest, lets talk about this in the morning" Sebastian said as he left the girl.
It took every ounce of his being to prevent himself from confessing that he likes her a lot too. But Sebastian will do his confession sober. If Y/N remembers this incident then they will talk about it. If not, he will wait for the right timing to discuss the feelings he has for her.
Morning came and Y/N did not remember anything.
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lanawinterscigarettes · 2 months ago
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hi aeron!! how are you sweetheart?? soo (for kinktober) could you do likee grinding with jen check x f!reader??
I'm doing great! I'm really excited getting everything ready for kinktober hehe
absolutely I can! you're the first person to request for kinktober 🥰 hope you like it!
Kinktober 2024 Day 1: grinding with Jennifer Check x fem reader
Warnings: smut/nsfw content, grinding/clothed sex, the reader is mentioned to be pretty inexperienced (Jen obviously is not so she helps them through it), bottom soft dom Jen + top kinda subby reader, slight overstimulation (reader receiving), Jen is probably a bit out of character because I wrote her as being more gentle and sweet instead of snarky and mean (I regret nothing)
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Jennifer was such a good friend, always teaching you new things. She taught you how to perfectly paint your nails, she taught you what facemasks and skincare products gave you the softest skin, and now she was teaching you how to get off with another person in a way that didn't involve making a huge mess.
Her arms were wrapped around your neck as she laid underneath you, her head tilted back to expose the delicate skin of her neck to you. The sight alone was enough to get you wet, and that was even without the intense makeout session you'd had a mere few minutes beforehand.
"Just like that, baby, there you go," she gently coaxed you into grinding down against her, your movements a little out of sync as this was your first time doing something like this.
"I- I don't think I'm very good at this," you admitted in a shaky tone as you hid your face in the crook of her neck, pressing the occasional sweet kiss to the area. It was hard for you to think properly when your underwear was soaked.
"You're doing fine. You just need to relax a little, okay?" Her words dripped into your ears like fresh honey, and you nodded your head in understanding, trying to relax your body so you wouldn't feel so stiff moving against her.
"O- Okay," you mumble while trying to find a rhythym to the way you were rolling your hips into hers, hoping you were doing a good job. You weren't sure how much she could feel through the layers of fabric from the clothes you were both still wearing, and you wanted this to be good for her, too. "Like- like this?"
The soft moan that was drawn from her mouth a moment later was confirmation that you were doing at least a somewhat decent job, her legs spreading apart a bit more from muscle memory. "Mm, yes, baby, just like that-"
Her nails dug into your back through your shirt as she clung to you, and you felt her body arch upwards in a desperate attempt for more contact. Your hands gripped onto the bedsheets beneath you, unable to stop the few whimpers that escaped when you felt your throbbing clit brush against the tight material of your jeans, the perfect combination of both too much friction and delicious relief.
"J- Jen, I- I don't know if I can take this anymore-" You admitted in a shaky voice, the needy thrusts you were giving her clothed heat starting to become sloppy. You were fairly certain you'd already reached your peak a couple of minutes ago, but you were determined to ignore the jolts of overstimulation that were currently wracking your body.
"I know you are, it's okay." Hearing her sultry tone and feeling her hot breath against the side of your face was definitely not helping matters.
Shaking your head, you kept going despite starting to feel the muscles in your thighs cramp. "N- No, I- I wanna make you feel good, too..." Your voice died down as you started to lose your breath, choosing to focus less on speaking and more on her. Her pleasure, her sounds, her body- it was all about Jennifer in that moment.
Usually she would be all for having someone put all their energy into pleasing her, into making her feel good while completely ignoring their own pleasure, but if there was one person she couldn't stand to see overexerting themself it was you.
"Honey, I know you want to make me feel good, but you're going to end up collapsing on top of me if you keep going," she murmured lovingly, leaning up to pepper gentle kisses along your jawline as she spoke. "You can stop if you want to, it's okay."
"Are- are you sure?" You looked down at her, searching her face for a sign of confirmation that it was truly okay for you to stop.
"Yeah, I'm sure." She moved her hands down to your hips in an effort to stop your movements, knowing you were going to keep going if she didn't properly intervene. You could still feel your arousal pooling between your legs, quite certain it had started to leak through into your jeans by now.
"If you insist," you muttered as you let go of where you'd been gripping onto the sheets, carefully rolling off her and onto your back. "I- I just didn't want to leave you hanging. I'm sorry."
"It's okay, baby, I promise," she reassured you in a low and soothing voice, leaning in to give your cheek an affectionate kiss. "I knew you'd get overwhelmed pretty easily since you've never done this before. It's alright."
You let out a quiet sigh of relief at her words, nodding your head. "Thank you for being so understanding. I love you."
She smiled while kissing you again, on the lips this time. "Love you, too."
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sturn-saturn · 3 months ago
Text
the diamond lab
pairing: fem!reader x bf!chris
warnings: cutesy stuff hehe, y/n getting suspicious of her best friend and chris, one slight sexual joke, not proofread
part 2 part 3
word count: 945
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aruba. it's known for it's stunning white sand beaches, the bluest ocean you'll ever dip your toes in, and warm sunny weather. this beautiful island is a place you and chris have been talking about visiting for ages, and it's finally happening.
you, your boyfriend chris, matt, his girlfriend (@flouvela) flora, nate, larray, sam, colby, tara, jake, and johnnie booked a trip to the island as a way to get away from reality for a couple days. you all booked a hotel at palm beach, a touristy area with so many dining choice to choose from. you all were so excited so excited to explore this island.
matts girlfriend is the reason you and chris ended up together. when you two were dorming in college she told you about this really attractive guy she went on a date with and it turns out he was a triplet! they both convinced you and chris to go on a date and get to know each other and the rest is history.
you all made your way to the hotel you'll be staying at and checked in.
"alright everyone, we're gonna get dressed and we'll go out for dinner." chris says.
"woah okay mr. boss man." you giggle, giving his lips a little peck.
you and chris were sharing a room. matt and flora, nick and nate, larray and jake, sam and coldby, and johnnie and tara wanted their own rooms.
"are you excited for this trip?" chris asks you. he grabs you by your waist and holds you close enough to see how bright your eyes are shining.
"i'm so excited, and i'm even more grateful you planned all of this out." you smile.
"yeah. i know how stressful it gets for you when you plan things so i thought it would be easier if i did it."
"oh so husband material."
"husband? i like the sound of that." he smirks as he captures your lips in a kiss. "c'mon sweet cheeks, time to get dressed."
you and chris finish getting and head down to the lobby to wait for the rest of the crew.
"what do you feel like having tonight, mama?"
"mm, i'm really in the mood for italian." you smile.
"alright, alright, you can wait until we get back to the hotel room."
you playfully hit his arm with a shocked expression. "chris! don't say things like that in public!"
"oh c'mon, you like it."
"okay, fine. i do, but stop it!"
"what are you two love birds talking about?" flora asks walking up to us with the rest of our friends.
"oh you know, just y/n wanting a piece of me."
"oh god, here they go again." larray jokes."
"chill, she suggested italian. is everyone cool with that?"
scattered agreement spread amongst your friends.
"they agree? usually they all want to eat something different..." you thought to yourself.
you all made your way across the street where all the restaurants and bars are.
"oh wow, that gelato place looks amazing can we go after chris?" you ask grabbing his arm like a child.
"of course, baby. i know you ned your sweet treats after dinner." he smiles down at you. "you look so beautiful, you know that?"
"you make me feel beautiful."
you finally pick an italian place that seems appetizing and wait to be seated.
"we're gonna have so many left overs if we all order something. do you guys wanna get a few dishes and split them so we wont have as many left overs?" you ask.
"yeah, that sounds like a good idea." jake says.
"make sure we get something that has no meat for tara." you say.
"you're so cute." tara says holding your hand.
once your food arrives you all dig in and chat amongst each other on how excited you are to be here and what your plans are for the next couple days.
you notice chris and flora are exchanging glances but don't think much of it. although it was a little weird, you didn't want to cause any problems and just wanted to enjoy this island with your boyfriend and your best friends.
after dinner and gelato you all decide to take a walk on the beach capturing memories on matts digital camera, your phones, making tiktoks, and just messing around. you really were having the time of your life.
watching the sunset is something you always loved doing. now you get to watch the sunset on the beach in aruba and it's a whole other feeling coursing through your body.
it was getting dark now so you all made your way back to your designated hotel rooms and got ready for bed.
"so, how was your first day here?" chris asks. you both are cuddled up in bed holding each other.
"better than i ever imagined. thank you chris."
"no, thank you."
"for what?"
"being you."
"you're so corny." you playfully roll your eyes.
"you love it tho!"
"i do. i really do."
"alright, sweet cheeks, bed time."
the next morning...
you wake up the next morning to face chris but notice he's gone.
"chris?" you call out.
"i'm in the bathroom, love."
you stayed in bed for a few and waited for chris to finish up.
"can i see the pictures you took of me last night?" you ask.
"yeah, of course. my phone is under my pillow."
you reach under his pillow to grab his phone and type in his passcode, your birthday.
you press the photos app and see a notification pop up from your best friend flora that reads...
"don't let y/n find out."
"what the fuck." you whisper, your heart dropping. "don't let me find out what?"
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slasherx · 7 months ago
Note
Hey again, congratulations on getting a 94%, hope you do well on the other one!
Idk if I requested this because I have horrible memory but can you do a Thomas hewitt x pregnant s/o smut, like I'm feeling it rn
If I already did request this just ignore this one
Hey again Diablo (hope you don't mind me calling you that), I was hoping for another one of your requests :3 No, you haven't requested this yet. I will have you know though (and anyone else reading who cares about this) I passed my other final!
Content: Thomas Hewitt x fem!Reader
Warnings: This is smut, so 18+. Minors, DNI. Reader is pregnant.
Notes: You already know about the GIF, hehe... btw Katherine is the name of the tea lady for me. The actresses name was Kathy so I thought something close would be good.
• ───────────────── •
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When you initially got pregnant, most of the house was ecstatic. Hoyt went on and on about continuing the family line, Luda Mae was excited to finally have grandbabies, and Thomas was excited to be a father. Monty was the only one who complained about the presence of a baby.
Even Katherine and Henrietta were excited for you and Thomas. But nobody was more excited than Thomas. Even before you began to show, he was touching your stomach every chance he got. He couldn't believe that all those nights led to a baby finally being put in your stomach.
It made him hard most nights to know that his seed was growing inside of you. and thats how he got between your legs this very night, making you whimper and moan for him just like how he used to before you got pregnant.
He was scared leading up to this, not wanting to hurt the baby, but he just couldn't keep his hands off of you for nine months. So here you sit, at the edge of your shared bed, six months pregnant with his child and he's using his tongue to warm you up for his cock.
His tongue darted across your slit before sliding in, squirming around and wetting your insides just nice for him, as if they weren't wet enough. He held your legs against his head, encouraging you to squeeze him between your thighs. His cock jumped at the loud moan that fell from your lips as he moved to suck on your clit.
You grabbed his hair as he sucked hard on your clit, tugging on him slightly. "Thomas, Thomas please...just fuck me. I'm ready."
Tommy looked up at you with the same uncertainty he gave you on your first night together. His tongue slid over your clit one more time before he stood up. He gently began to move you onto your knees, ass up and face down.
"Please, Tommy...don't be gentle. I can handle it." You pleaded, wiggling your ass at him.
Tommy felt his cock jump again and his pants were off in an instant. Lining up to his favorite hole - your pussy - he began to push in. He let out a loud groan as he finally sunk in. It had been a few months since he last fucked you. He missed this so much. He missed you.
He grabbed your hips and saw how his dick disappeared inside of you, and finally how your ass looked pressed flush to his groin. And suddenly, all sense of gentleness went out the window.
He pulled all the way back until just the tip was in, then he slammed back inside of you and knocked the air out of your lungs. You didn't get any time to breathe as Thomas steadily pounded into you.
You could feel how your pussy clenched around him, seemingly making him bigger as you clamped down. You moaned into the pillow you grabbed, trying to quiet the noise and be considerate of the other people in this house. Thomas however, had other plans.
He reached forward and grabbed your hair, pulling your head up so you can freely moan into the air. Clapping sounds could be heard throughout the room, along with the squelching sounds of your pussy sliding along his cock.
Your back was perfectly arched so your ass was at its juciest point, and Tommy reared his hand back to slap it. You yelped at the sting, but your body continued to be jostled by his quick thrusts. You could barely keep up with him.
"To-Tommy please, slow dow-w-w-n..." You moaned, drool beginning to pile up at the corners of your mouth.
Thomas refused, grabbing the meat of your thigh and pounding further into you, sending you forwards. He let go of your hair, allowing you to drop into the pillow. With all the wieght and rocking, your arms were beginning to grow tired. Before you knew it, your arms had given out and you landed on your stomach.
Tommy grabbed your legs and flipped you on your side, one leg thrown over his shoulder. He fucked back into you, feeling his orgasm rise. He grunted and used his thumb to rub at your clit, making sure to press hard so you really feel the friction.
You moaned loudly at the pressure against your clit, feeling the familiar coil in your stomach form. "Tommy, oh Tommy, I'm gonna cum...!"
He grunted desperately to let you know he was going to cum too. After a few more harsh thrusts, he began to cum inside of you. He rubbed your clit furiously, allowing you to cum with him. You moaned loudly into the pillow, feeling your body wracked with pleasure, pulsating around your husbands cock.
Tommy slowly pulled out, and pulled his pants back up. He turned to his wardrobe and lifted up a few shirts to show a stolen wash cloth. He turns around and uses it to gently wipe you up, both of your cum being wiped up. Normally he'd finger it back into you, but he didn't think that should happen with his baby inside of you.
After discarding the wash cloth on the floor to be washed later, he climbed into the bed with you and pulled you close, kissing your forehead. You leaned up and kissed him on the lips, the mask scratching your face. He put a hand on your stomach and whimpered slightly.
"The baby is okay, honey, and so am I. I promise." You smiled at him, hair a mess and drool pooling at the corner of your mouth.
Tommy wiped away the drool from your face and pet your hair, bringing your face to his neck. He loved you, he loved your baby, and he knew you loved him too. As you slowly began to drift off to sleep, Tommy's gaze remained on you, his heart fixated on all the love he built over the years, and all the love that is to come.
• ───────────────── •
Here's my masterlist, in case you like what you see and want to request more!
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oh-meretseger · 8 months ago
Text
part 4 - Tease
attack on titan modern college au // Jean Kirstein x fem!reader
summary: the sexual frustration between you gets to its peak when your first kiss happens (🥹), starting a game of brutal teasing on both sides
notes: 18+! although not so much of a smut (some public touching and groping, making out hehe), mainly fluff, some cute moments before posting some disgustingly dirty smut in the next chapter lmao
word count: 4,6k
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"Sasha, stop calling me pookie bear or I'm going ballistic" Jean calmly blinked in her direction after setting the empty box of pad thai down. Sasha was already on her third portion, mercilessly stuffing her face full like she's been starving for a week.
"But you're my pookie bear, what do you mean?" Sasha's jaw stopped chewing, stunned for a moment by hearing such astonishing nonsense, as she stared back at Jean. She notoriously got addicted to every single silly nickname she made up for her friends, and used it uncontrollably until she discovered a new one.
Jean let out an exhausted sigh, but still leaned back on his bed with a chuckle as he shook his head.
"And what about me?" Connie complained loudly from the other bed with a mouth full of noodles. None of the three were giving any more fucks about the movie playing on Connie's notebook in the background.
"You're my pookie pie"
"Yeah, I like pie" Connie shrugged, giving his blessing as Sasha nodded diligently.
"I know"
"Yeah, but I'm not a bear, so how does that work?" Jean huffed, holding back a smile at how Sasha's expression instantly turned outraged, just like he guessed.
"You are!" Sasha snapped at him and Jean laughed out loud. "You're a big ass hairy animal, but still cute and huggable"
"Ah right, thanks" Jean's ironic tone did not faze her in the slightest.
"I'm deeply sorry bro, but I wouldn't say you're cute, at all" Connie's eyes were back on the movie, although his attention was fully on the brilliant, highly knowledgeable conversation in the background.
"Y/N thinks you are" Sasha shrugged carelessly while ruthlessly devouring her last bites of dinner, and Jean's heart started pounding in his chest all of a sudden.
He cleared his throat to avoid choking on his own saliva, and tried to reply just as casually as Sasha spit out this small little information.
"What do you mean?" Jean couldn't believe how flustered he became by simply hearing your name. He didn't like it. The hell is his heart beating so fast for?
"She has the biggest crush on you, don't tell me you didn't notice" Sasha giggled to herself at Jean's honest, dumb expression. She found you two idiots adorable, pretending you didn't absolutely have the hots for each other.
"The hell are you on? They're at each other's throats all the fucking time" Connie turned his head at hearing such nonsensical gibberish.
"I truly feel sorry for you men sometimes" Sasha blinked at two of the most imbecile faces she's ever seen. "Are you really that slow?! Why in tarnation do you think I left you two alone?"
Jean felt heat spread through his body as images of you popped up in his memory, your warm body against his, teeth sunk into his skin...
"They fucked?!" Connie yelled out in shock and Jean couldn't help cracking up at how serious he sounded.
"Not YET" Sasha looked at Connie with a nod of true wisdom as Jean huffed in disapproval. Although deep inside, a feeling of excitement started to make him tingle.
"Shut your silly mouth, Sasha" Jean snapped at her, holding back a smile trying to climb up on his face all the way from his heart. "You've been acting a fool since you started latching onto that canteen guy"
"My brother in Christ, you're in denial" Sasha gave up. She already knew you were bound to be together anyway. "And I've always been silly, Niccolo just brings out the best in me"
"I love that guy, he makes the best risottos" Connie agreed in his own way, still pretending to watch the movie.
"He cooks me his secret special meals" she added, her eyes literally sparkling with pure bliss as she said those words, and Jean rolled his eyes. "I'm bringing him to your party, Consuelo"
"That's literally not my name" Connie stated, not even moving his eyes from the screen in front of him.
"Okay, Conrad"
"I'm texting Marco to come" Jean grabbed his phone, verbalizing his actions as both Sasha and Connie turned their head in excitement.
"Yesss, I miss Marco!"
You were rather anxious about this party. Connie's parents lived close to the campus, and the group of people Connie invited over to their house sounded fun when Sasha listed them all to you in detail. But still, there was something unnerving about a night of careless fun, coming out of your little shell and letting yourself go in front of such new people, in front of Jean.
"C'mon, we're gonna have an amazing time!" Sasha encouraged you after seeing a small anxious frown form on your face.
"I know, it's always an amazing time with you guys" you smiled, your heart pounding hard at the thought of seeing Jean at the party. "But what should I wear?"
"POOKIE, let me help you with that" Sasha jumped up from your bed and shot straight to your closet, as you watched her with an entertained grin.
You walked down the hallway on the way to your afternoon class, Friday leaving a freeing bliss in your chest as you listened to your playlist. The always busy corridor was now almost empty, everyone having left the stress of weekdays behind to finally enjoy their free time. Anxiety turned into a small glimpse of excitement in your stomach the past few days, and you couldn't wait for it to be tomorrow night.
Your headphones suddenly flying off of your head jerked you out of being in your own thoughts, and before you could even react, a strong hand grabbed your wrist, pulling you into a narrow passageway with an overwhelming force.
Your body crashed into a much larger frame, and a familiar sense of warmth flowed through you as Jean's smell hit your nose before you could even get a look at your kidnapper.
"Hey! Give it back!" your hand shot towards his immediately, but of course with one movement of his arm your headphones were instantly removed far from your reach, as he held it up above his head. A grin grew on his face as he looked down at you, his other hand still squeezing your wrist, and once again, you felt your cheeks get warm under his intense stare. That stupid cocky grin of his...
"D'you think I should?" Jean's voice was smooth and low, enough to make your mind go hazy. You couldn't believe how fast it all could get too much. His intoxicating scent, the warmth of his body as he towered over you, his fingers' touch on your skin, his voice and beautiful hazel eyes melting you into a puddle...
You felt weak.
"Can you stop doing that? My arm is getting all bruised up from you pulling on it" you sneered up at him, not even trying to get further away as your bodies pressed into each other. Jean's eyes slipped down to your plump lips as you mockingly smirked. "And kidnapping me"
"Kidnapping you? You could definitely not move your little hands around like that, if I were to kidnap you" Jean's raised hand inched lower and lower to slowly put your headphones around your neck as your eyes desperately pierced into his. You felt yourself melt into him, his look deliberately making you go soft and mindless, as his delicious-looking lips were so dangerously close to you...
As Jean's other hand became free, it slid down on the sleeve of your hoodie to grab your other wrist. The hard grip of his hands restraining yours was enough to make you soaking wet.
And that strangely made your confidence bounce right back.
"Why are you stalking me anyway?" you stared into his eyes with a self-assured smile slightly curving your lips.
Jean felt blood rush right to his crotch at the devilish sparkle in your eyes, almost visibly turning dark as you looked up at him. What a naughty girl.
Although weakness was palpable in the air between both of you. You both knew you would fold the moment your hips pressed into each other just a tad bit more.
Jean's hands gripping your wrists moved them behind your back with a swift motion.
"Don't think so highly of yourself, Miss Important" he smiled and you felt yourself blushing again as his arms pulled your body more into his, cuffing your hands behind you. Being controlled by Jean's big arms felt... Heavenly. "You want me to stalk you, don't you?"
"Unlike yourself, I'm not a pervert, dumbass" you let the magic word slip from between your lips, and warmth filled your chest as Jean cracked up. You felt like you could stay in his embrace forever, looking at his handsome face and beautiful smile endlessly... If your pussy didn't ache from the tension of being restrained by his tall frame. "You're lucky you have such pretty eyes, otherwise I would be kneeling on your back right now"
Your obvious joke of physically overcoming him flew right over his head as your words of praise reached his ears - and a slight tint of pink immediately dusted his cheeks. From ear to ear.
You couldn't believe your eyes.
"Jean" your smile grew into the widest grin as the rarest species on planet Earth, flustered Jean hesitated momentarily, looking into your eyes. "Are you-"
You stopped your own words. Instantly wanting to tease him was like a natural instinct, but in a matter of moments, your urge to deepen that adorable blush on his face became overwhelming. You wanted him to know how much your lips desired his at that very moment. You wanted to make him feel good, you wanted to feel good.
Jean felt your body rise onto tiptoes under his arms as your heels parted from the ground and in a second, your face reached his, your lips connecting in a soft kiss.
You immediately melted at feeling each other's lips, sensitive nerves making your hungry minds explode with pleasure. Jean felt all tension leave your body, and let go of one of your wrists to catch you from collapsing. You literally felt your knees give out. Jean's arm felt so strong as it snaked around your waist, you barely audibly whimpered into the kiss - and Jean felt himself grow hard at the sweet sound.
"Mmph y- your lips feel so good" you mumbled against his soft lips and Jean was seeing stars. He never imagined your honeylike voice to be able to make him crumble even more in real life, than on the phone the other day. Your body so hot against his, the touch of your lips so plump and sweet on his, your scent making him feel like he was drunk out of his mind.
Jean let out a quiet moan as your tongue danced along his lower lip, then slipped into his mouth eagerly. Immediately after you granted access, his tongue answered, sliding against yours, and you felt warmth flooding your pussy at the wet sounds you two were making. Jean's one hand gripping your wrist, the other one slowly sliding on the side of your waist, finding its way under your hoodie, making contact with the sensitive skin close to your breast...
It all felt so filthy, you were turned on beyond belief.
“Do you have any idea what you do to me?” Jean grunted quietly after your lips parted, looking into your big, pleading eyes, but you already missed their warmth, so you softly pressed your lips back to his.
“What?” you whispered against him, your eyelids low from the heavenly feeling, and you felt Jean’s lips curve into a smile.
“You make me want to rip this off of you, right here, right now” Jean pulled on the sleeve of your hoodie, then with that same motion he grabbed your hand, removing it from its comfortable place on the side of his neck. You quietly whimpered as you felt one of his large hands gripping both of your wrists behind your back, his now free hand starting to slowly roam over your clothes. “You seem like the type of bad girl that likes the danger of getting caught”
“And you seem like the type to talk big, but do nothing” you knew exactly how bratty you sounded trying to tease Jean, but you also knew he had complete control over you. Your words were snarky, but your eyes blinked up at him with desperation, cheeks flushed with arousal.
Jean let out a chuckle.
“Yeah, you’re right” he smiled, but a sinful light flashed in his hazel eyes. Oh, you’re in for it. His free hand skimmed down to the brim of your hoodie, lifting it to expose the jeans tight on your butt. You unintentionally let out a sigh as his fingers gripped into the fabric and he started groping your ass without any shame. “I wouldn’t have the balls to touch you like that”
You felt wetness soaking through your panties at his firm touch, his breath hot on your ear as he looked at his own hand’s movements over your shoulder.
“I wouldn’t dare to pull these down” the groping stopped as a long finger creeped under the waist of your jeans, sending chills up your spine as he lightly dragged his fingertip along your skin. “What would we do if someone caught you with pants around your knees, moaning like a whore?”
“Jean” you quietly whined his name, losing your mind as his palm slid up your waist, over that stupid hoodie preventing his skin from touching yours.
“Getting desperate, are we?” he spoke softly, his hand stopping right at the underwire of your bra. Jean’s fingers moved carefully around the curve of your clothed tits, earning another whimper from you as you felt your pussy clench around nothing. “How outrageous would it be to grope your naked tits…”
You wanted him to grab them, feel the soft tissue with his hand, but Jean’s thumb just gently brushed over your nipple getting hard under the multiple layers of clothes.
“Or to take them into my mouth… Suck on them” Jean felt like all the blood in his body rushed to his groin as he pressed his thumb into the plush of your breast. Feeling you against himself, watching your eyes close in pleasure and your pretty swollen lips form an O made it extremely painful to hold his composure. Your flushed cheeks made him want to press you against the wall and do exactly what he just described. “A coward like me wouldn’t wanna get caught licking you, fingers buried in your wet little hole”
Jean felt his hard cock twitch in his pants as you pressed your hips even harder into him, desperate to feel his growing erection. His hand slid onto your delicate neck, fingers gently pushing into the sides.
“Holy-“ you mumbled, your head falling back as Jean leaned closer, his scruff scratching the sensitive skin as he earned access to your neck. His lips grazed over your skin, sending tingles down your body, and he deeply inhaled your sweet scent...
Then everything got cruelly ripped away from you in a matter of seconds.
“See ya tomorrow, smartass” you heard Jean’s voice and your eyes shot open, only to be met with his self-assured, cocky grin. He let go of your wrists and your neck, hands sliding into the pockets of his denim jacket while he stepped back, depriving you of the blissful heat of his body.
Jean felt so satisfied, so pleased with himself. You stood there for a moment, left utterly confused, your big eyes still eager, blinking towards him, swollen lips parted as if you wanted to say something, but the feeling of surprise made you catch your breath. You were so adorable, he had to hold back a chuckle.
He liked how confident sexual tension seemed to make you, but he just couldn’t help himself teasing you, making you go weak under his control.
“Je-“ a fragile little sound tried to break through the shock gripping your throat, but Jean’s reply cut you off as he turned his back to you, simply walking away.
“Tomorrow!”
You just stood there, astounded, your heart still racing, warmth filling your cheeks and panties damp from your wetness. Jean’s grip still burned the skin on your wrists and neck like a phantom. Your mind was so confused, you couldn’t even be mad at the man arrongantly strolling away from you like this was the most entertaining walk of his life.
And you completely forgot about the afternoon class you were originally headed to.
Frustration quickly turned into confidence as you stood in front of the mirror in your dorm after your little ice cream date with Sasha, getting ready for the party. It was a rare occasion, so you let your hair down, to Sasha’s biggest delight.
"You look sooo good, dear lord!" she exclaimed with an enthusiastic smile, encouraging you to do a little spin and she howled like a wolf.
"C'mon, it's not that special" you laughed at her excessive reaction. "But you do look breathtaking in that dress, emerald suits you"
"You think so?" Sasha looked down at herself, hands soothing the thin fabric. It was quite short, sleeves off the shoulders, showing off her delicate, pale skin. She truly looked beautiful.
"Niccolo's gonna pee his pants seeing you" you nodded and Sasha cracked up.
"He better pee his pants" she slipped her arms into her bolero. "And Jean better jizz his pants, to be honest"
"Sasha!" you chuckled as you shook your head, trying to shake off the thought of Jean orgasming, in any way, before your blushing could give any awkward feelings away. Sasha jumped to you and leaned over to pull your dress in all the right places to make it look even better. It was black and tight, its length ending right above your knees, but a longer slit letting one of your thighs be seen.
"What? You're a goddess, you better start believing that" Sasha threw her oversized leather jacket on your shoulders. "C'mon, grab your phone, let's go"
Connie's parents must be delighted to let a bunch of kids trash their house, you thought, as Sasha closed the door of your Uber and caught up to you waiting on the pavement. It seemed like a nice and quiet neighborhood, now muffled thuds breaking the silence of the street as you heard the bass of the music coming from inside.
"Bruh, Cornelius told me he invited twenty people at max" Sasha noted as you walked past a few unfamiliar faces sitting on the stairs of the front porch, drinking and cackling loudly. She swung the front door open like she owned the place, and the brutal noise hit you in your chest.
"Who the hell is Cornelius?" you asked with an amused laugh, but Sasha couldn't hear you anymore, the sound of loud music, people shouting, laughing and just generally being intoxicated deafening both of you. Sasha grabbed your hand, pulling you through the crowd.
Bumping into a bunch of strangers in a dimly lit room and loud noise overwhelming your senses was not how you imagined Connie's "friendly get together" to go.
"There he is" Sasha let go of your hand as you reached the kitchen, the lights brighter and the noise slightly less disturbing than in the crowded living room. You leaned against the doorframe where Sasha left you as you watched Sasha punch Connie's arm without a word being spoken between them.
"AARGH, are you out of your mind?" Connie jumped back from the open fridge in shock, his hand shooting towards the painful shoulder.
"You told me it was gonna be a small party! How are we supposed to order pizza for so many people?" Sasha yelled at him, absolutely infuriated about the food situation.
Non-existant food situation, may we add.
"Why should we order pizza for everyone?! I don't even know them, who cares?" Connie yelled back at her, grabbing a bottle of beer from the fridge. "Did you come over to ask brainless questions, or will you let me have a fucking break?"
"Hi Y/n!" you suddenly heard your name from behind and your head snapped towards the familiar voice. You were met with Berthold's smile and his usual peaceful expression, not even minding Sasha and Connie killing each other in the background.
"Hi Bert" you smiled back, happy to see him. You rarely got to talk to him at the one single class you had together. "How are you?"
"Uh, good thanks, barely holding on inside this hell of a house" he replied and you chuckled, perfectly understanding his struggle with crowded, loud places.
"You're telling me! I feel like exploding and we just arrived" you shook your head. "Where's Annie?"
"We're sitting outside on the patio, you should join us. It's a lot more quiet out there" he suggested as a large hand slapped on his shoulder. You looked up at the tall man appearing next to Bert, broad shoulders towering over you, fingers running through his blonde hair, bright eyes and a charming smile glistening towards you. "This is my friend, Reiner, by the way. I don't think you've met"
"Nice to meet you, Reiner" you nodded with a friendly smile and he accepted your hand reaching towards him, shaking it gently.
"The pleasure's mine, Y/n" Reiner softly returned your smile, and you started to feel flustered at the intense eye contact. "How come I've never seen you around campus?"
"She's pretty lame, looks like a grey little mouse most of the time" an unmistakable voice appeared next to you, and you turned to Jean sticking out your  tongue in an instant. Bert rolled his eyes with a laugh and went over to the fridge, probably getting the drinks he originally came there for.
"Who asked the blockhead?" you snapped back as Jean stopped close to you, one arm pressing to yours, grinning down at you.
Your heart secretly started racing just by seeing him.
"Dunno man, looks like a gorgeous mouse to me" Reiner said winking at you, then turned and went to join Bert pondering in front of the open fridge. Warmth spread on your face as you watched Reiner grab a beer, and you deliberately avoided looking at Jean. "You want one, Jeanbo?"
"Nah, I'm good, thanks" Jean replied casually, but clenched his teeth as he looked down at your face, blushed from his compliment. The hell are you blushing for? Is this buff jock what you're into? Reiner, really?
Jean's jaw relaxed at the thought of how you'd probably clown him for being jealous. Jealous, good lord... It was like you sensed his eyes stuck on you, you raised your face to look at him with those big, sparkling eyes.
How could he not be jealous?
"Big man's not wrong" Jean said softly, so only you could hear, his eyes glancing over your outfit, then back to your face, and you felt your cheeks burn under his look. "You look beautiful"
Your heart fluttered at his words and you couldn't help the smile instantly widening on your face. You turned your whole body towards Jean and felt your stomach flip at how his hazel eyes glistened right back at you with a warm smile.
"You look pretty handsome yourself" you grinned, moving to hold both of his hands. Jean's heart fluttered to the same rhythm yours did as the sight of your pretty smile and the touch of your fingers combined started to make him melt. "This shirt looks so good on you"
Your fingers ran along the collar of his dark button-up shirt, the fabric soft, comfy and smelling of his delicious scent.
"Don't try to make me blush, you little rat" he grunted with a low voice, making you laugh out loud, and he lifted his hands to grab both sides of your face, long fingers reaching into your hair at the nape of your neck. Tingles ran down your spine as your arms moved automatically to hug his waist as he stood so close to you. "Where are your glasses, smartass?"
"I'm wearing contacts" you blinked up at him as he stroked a few strands of your hair to tug them behind your ears.
Your stomach doing a backflip once again.
"I like the glasses" he brushed his thumb over your cheek, then looked back to your eyes, making your body burn with the familiar sense of warmth. "But you look pretty regardless"
You swallowed your reply as Jean's eyes shot to your lips. So plump and invitingly glistening with gloss. He wanted to kiss you so much.
"I like the earrings, too" Jean swiftly shifted his eyes to the little silver figures dangling from your ears. He  thought they wonderfully emphasized your delicate little neck.
"Thanks, they're ladybugs" you grinned and Jean chuckled.
"Are they your little magical ladybugs? I knew you were a witch" he watched with a smirk as you bursted into laughing. He also noticed the shimmery eyeshadow on your eyelids, and how the makeup and your jewellery complimented your look so well. Although he knew exactly how gorgeous you were without them.
"You're very attentive tonight, Jeanbo" you sneered at him and Jean rolled his eyes at your smug smile. He hated that nickname.
"He's my teammate, your ass is not allowed to use that name"
"Will I be allowed if I start beating you with a stick as well?" your smile widened at making Jean crack up.
"The hell do you think we do while playing hockey?" he laughed, one of his hands moving to grab your chin. "It's not just beating each other with sticks, believe it or not"
"Sure" you borderline didn't even know what you were talking about. Not even having a sip of alcohol yet, you smiled up at Jean drunkenly, intoxicated by how good he felt to all of your senses at that moment.
Sasha's loud sounds of excitement snapped you both out of your own little world.
"WHAT, they're filled with cherry cream?!" she covered her mouth with a hand, in a state of complete shock as Niccolo held out a tray of cupcakes in front of her.
Niccolo nodded with an enthusiastic smile in your direction, and you waved at him with an amused chuckle as Jean let go of you and walked over to them. You've already met Niccolo countless times, but you could never get enough of their emotion-filled interactions with Sasha - strong emotions about food, mostly.
"Hey!" Connie yelped as Sasha slapped his hand trying to steal from the dessert. "This is my house, give me a cupcake!"
"It's your father's house, Constance" Sasha stated seriously, and you bursted out laughing as Connie's low-lidded stare met your eyes. He was so tired of the names.
"Are you pulling these names out of your ass?"
"I'm pulling the cupcake out of your ass, if you dare to steal any of- HEY!" Sasha practically jumped on Connie's back as he rapidly grabbed one of them from the tray, trying to get away and stuff it into his mouth before Sasha could stop him.
A few people, unfamiliar with this otherwise very usual situation, quickly left the kitchen before they found themselves in the middle of a physical altercation, and you and Jean were in absolute hysterics.
"Eat it then, you fucking piece of pie!" Sasha shouted at Connie, still riding on his back, smearing the cherry cupcake around his face with her palm.
"Uh- Yo-" Connie's desperate attempts of yells were muffled as Niccolo tried to pull Sasha from him with no success. "Y'suff- You'll suffocate me!"
"Ah, feels like I never left town" a voice laughed loudly next to you, and you raised your teary eyes to look at the stranger. The tall, brunette man stepped straight to Jean, throwing an arm around his shoulders as he snatched his head in his direction.
"MARCO!"
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justwinginglife · 4 months ago
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Hi! I absolutely loveeeee your writing!!! Hopefully you’re still doing requests hehe…
Maybe reader and Hoshina were childhood bffs and then the reader’s family sent her abroad (maybe to serve in another county’s defense force???) but now she’s back in Japan and assigned to the Third Division. And ofc they still make an amazing team and know each other by heart and maybeeeee some feelings start to rise now that they’re adults and all that???
HELLO I'm so happy you love my writing! Of COURSE I'm still doing requests, I'm having too much fun with everyone's prompts so thank you for sending me more suggestions!
No Matter The Distance
You were dreaming of Soshiro again. This time you recalled the memory of when you were eight and you'd tripped and scraped your knees so he carried you home on his back. You were such a crybaby back then. You nearly soaked his shoulder, sobbing from the pain. He sang to you the whole way home so you'd focus on his voice and not your bleeding knees. He surprisingly sang rather well.
"Sing to me again." You mumbled in your sleep as you rolled over onto your side. "I like when you sing... to me..."
When you woke up in the morning, he was neither singing to you nor carrying you, in fact, he wasn't even in the same country as you. It was a rude awakening every time and you still hadn't gotten used to it.
You knew it was naive of you to cling to memories from your past, but when you relived them every night it didn't seem so long ago. But now that you counted, it had been about six years since you'd seen him. You'd known each other since preschool and you'd parted ways when you both turned 18. Your parents thought you'd make a better life for yourself in America so you were shipped overseas, never to see his smiling face again.
You wondered if he dreamed about you too. You wondered if he was even the same person you remembered. It'd been over half a decade- a lot could change. You hoped he was still the same. You knew that was naive too.
You try to quit sulking and you finish getting ready for work. You clock in at 0800 and report for duty. You are surprised to find that your commanding officer has been waiting for you to arrive. She takes in the sight of you as if it's the last time she'll see you. Then she smiles. "Good morning Vice Captain."
You nod to her. "Cap'n. Mornin'. What're all the long looks for?"
Her weight shifts and she clears her throat. "Well, it seems the General has made an alliance with the Japan Anti-Kaiju Defense Force and as a show of good faith, he's sending one of our best soldiers to their side."
You raise an eyebrow. "The Director General himself? Who could be important enough from our team that he'd send so far across the seas?"
She coughs.
OH.
"Maybe, I don't know, the youngest female to make Vice Captain in the shortest amount of time? Maybe someone with, I don't know, Japanese background?"
Yup.
You can't decide if you're honored, nervous, scared, or excited. You haven't been back home in so long. Will it still be the same? The same restaurants, the same stores, the same people. Will they still be waiting for you?
"You fly out at 1200."
Your brows furrow. "You're giving me 4 hours to pack up all my things and say goodbye to everyone? That's ridiculous."
She nods sympathetically. "I know. But he wants to get this show on the road, it seems."
You sigh. "Alright. I'll head back to my place, please assemble the squad before I go so I can give everyone my best wishes."
You pack up your entire apartment in two hours. You have less things than you thought you did. You guess that some small subconscious part of you kept you from collecting too many things that would keep you grounded here. Maybe you always knew you'd return home.
It takes even less time to say bye to everyone. You're ready to ship out in just under three hours and the pilot shrugs, saying you're his only passenger anyway and he can afford to leave early. The Director General lent you his private plane after all.
You can't do anything about your nerves so you make the best of this trip, ordering lavish foods while you read. Your favorite book is one that Soshiro bought for you and the ink from the personal message he wrote on the inside of the front cover is so faded from you constantly rubbing your thumb over it nostalgically.
Soshiro. You'll be there soon.
You sleep through most of the flight. You dream about him again, to no one's surprise at this point.
This time you're both 17, you both snuck out of training together to attend a typical high school party. You were in agreement that the two of you wanted one normal high school experience before you both went off and joined the Defense Force and became stiff, disciplined officers. Of course, you'd tease Soshiro that you couldn't see him ever being stiff or disciplined.
Anyway, you'd been playing spin the bottle and Soshiro's spin landed on you and the both of you ended up in a closet together.
"Well this is a stupid game." He grumbled as he searched for the light to the closet. He would never make you do anything against your will and he found it ridiculous that that's exactly what this game was made for.
But you didn't find it ridiculous. You found it lucky. Your heart was beating loudly in your chest. You grabbed his hand before it reached the light switch and you kissed him in the dark.
He hesitated and then he kissed you back, gently pressing you up against the wall.
When someone knocked on the door seven minutes later, he locked the door and stayed in there with you until he was ready to leave. He must've known if the two of you stepped outside, you'd both go back to acting like nothing happened. Like you had plenty of time to figure out these messy feelings of yours. But neither of you could predict that you wouldn't even be in the same country as him a month later, so you both kept ducking the topic and pushing your feelings for each other down. And then it was too late.
Six years too late, you thought to yourself as your eyes fluttered open. The plane was descending. You were arriving in Japan as last.
You wondered who you'd be serving under and if Soshiro would be in the same platoon. The JAKDF had several divisions, it wasn't guaranteed that you'd even be in the same one as him. You'd been told that the position of Vice Captain had been recently opened at one of the Divisions and you were there to fill that spot. You'd do your best to fill the shoes of whoever came before you and make your team back in America proud.
As you step out of the plane you're greeted by your new teammates in the Third Division. Your eyes scan the crowd and they finally find the person they're looking for.
Your breath catches in your throat and you freeze on the last step of the plane.
He holds a hand out to you to help you down all the way.
"Welcome to the Third Division. I'm Captain Hoshina."
You take his hand and step down the last stair. You don't let go of his hand even when he's introducing you to the troops. You think this might be you dreaming about him again and you don't dare let go just in case.
He doesn't seem to mind. He keeps a firm grip on you and when you've finally greeted everyone he tells them he needs to discuss more matters with you privately.
The two of you enter his office and he closes the door behind him. Before you can speak, he's wrapped you up in a warm hug. "Vice Captain, huh? Impressive." He whispers, still holding you close.
You close your eyes and just soak in his voice. "Not as impressive as you- Captain Hoshina. And here I always thought I'd beat you to Captain when we were kids."
He chuckles and the familiar rumble of his laughter makes your heart skip several beats. He releases you from his arms so he can get a good look at you, but he still holds your hands tight in his. "I really never thought I'd see you again. And look at you now. Gorgeous as ever."
You blush. "Still cheeky I see."
He grins widely. "Still me. Always."
You're relieved. He doesn't seem to have changed at all, just gotten a little taller. And a little more... you gulp, a lot more muscular. You didn't realize it when he was holding you close because you were so focused on the way he smelled and the way he sounded. But now that you were getting a full view of him, you could see the efforts of his training peeking through his shirt. You blush deeper. Thank god he's a little dense and doesn't notice. He's just excited to see you again, he doesn't care if you're flushed or not.
"Hey- dinner on me later? We can go to that diner we liked." He nudges your arm.
You smile. "Yeah? I'm game, especially if you're buying."
He walks you to your room and then leaves you alone to unpack your things. You wish he wouldn't go but you know he has a division to run.
"Captain." You say to yourself, shaking your head. You hoped he would be in the same division as you, but you never could've imagined he'd be working this closely with you. You'll have to pay a visit to the shrine later and thank the gods.
You finish unpacking and you meet Soshiro for dinner in the cutest outfit you can find. You wonder if he'll notice.
He notices.
"So you don't wear the combat suit 24/7?" He teases.
You roll your eyes thinking he's not going to say anything else but then he looks away for a moment.
"You, um... you look real good."
You wonder where his confidence from earlier went. He can get away with calling you gorgeous but now here he is making the word "good" look difficult. You almost laugh.
He opens the door to the restaurant for you and then when you're led to a table, he pulls the chair out for you. You don't remember him being such a gentleman but he was still a teenager last time you saw him. It seems he has grown some after all.
As you eat dinner, you fall back into old rhythms- you steal food off of his plate and he does the same to yours. You even sword fight him with your chopsticks and he laughs the same familiar laugh that you love so much.
Then the drinks start to hit harder and the air seems to change between the two of you.
"So listen..." He starts, cautiously. He seems to get caught up in his own thoughts because he doesn't finish his sentence.
"I'm listening." You nudge him.
He gives you a small, pinched smile. "I don't know how to say this actually." He admits.
You wonder if he's thinking what you're thinking, but it's been so long you can't be sure. "You can say anything to me, you know that." You try to reassure him so that he continues.
He sighs. "Do you... remember going to a party? Back in high school?"
Ah. So he is thinking the same thing as you. You nod slowly.
He clears his throat uncomfortably. "Do you... remember what happened at that... party?"
You nod again, your cheeks starting to heat up at the thought of that mind-blowing kiss.
"It's just... we never... we never talked about it. And then you were just gone- just like that. And I know it's stupid to be bringing it up again so many years later, but you're the exact same as you've always been and I'm the same as I've always been and I just thought..." He trails off.
"You just thought...?" You lean in, hoping to god he finishes his sentence.
"I just thought... maybe now we could... talk about it? If-if you wanted."
"Okay, what do you have to say about it?"
He laughs at that. "Boy, you really don't make this easy do you? You never have."
"Sorry. I'll go first then, okay?"
He nods and waits for you to speak.
"I regretted it for six years."
He winces.
You backtrack. "Wait, sorry that's not how it was supposed to come out. Now you're making this hard."
You both laugh. Then he takes your hand.
"I think what you meant to say was you regretted leaving it the way we did?"
You nod. You're glad he's still able to understand you so well even after all these years.
"I do too. I thought, god, if I could just get one chance to tell her how I felt I'd do it. And now you're here and I'm stumbling over my words. But I need to say this. Because I can't wait another six years for you to find out that I love you. Because I love you. Always did, and still do."
You start to cry before you even realize it's happening. He immediately rushes over to your side of the table to brush the tears away.
"Hey, hey, did I say something wrong? Tell me. What's going on in that beautiful mind of yours?"
You can't figure out how to put the words together properly so you kiss him. He kisses you back more intensely than he did back then and you wish you can just freeze time so he can keep kissing you like this. Then he pulls away.
"You know, love, I like the way you're thinking but you still haven't given me an official answer."
You laugh. "I love you too- I should think it was obvious."
"Some of us only have half the brain that you do and need verbal confirmation."
"You got that right." You tease.
He wraps you up tight in his arms.
"So does this make us boyfriend-girlfriend?" He asks in his best "high schooler" voice, grinning like an idiot from ear to ear.
You roll your eyes. "Take me to the prom and we'll see about that."
He laughs. "Just let me date you already damnit."
You kiss him again.
"Was that a yes?"
You nod.
"Okay, again, I'm just checking."
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livingslime · 2 months ago
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OMGOSH HAIII (/≧w≦\)*!! RAHH I'm totes in love w/ Dr. Anselm AND in love with this game in general! 🤭💙 You have our full support---I hope this game grows big! Being part of the early game part of the community is honestly very exciting! I wish the best!! :3 🎀
NOW! Questions! o(^o^)o
How would Anselm react to an ambiverted MC? As an ambivert myself, ik that I can switch the way I act around people pretty quickly when it comes to a social battery! ^^;
What would it be like if the MC had a lil comfort plush with them? :0 👉🏾🧸
Would Dr. Anselm be interested in anime at all? (゜ロ゜; To add on, what is his preference of music? 🔥🎶
AAA sorry if this is a lot of questions! 😔 I'M JUST SO INVESTED AND CRAZY FOR THIS MAN YAYAY ♪ (#^w°)v I hope you have an amazing day, pookie!! 🎀🎀🫂
OOMMHEEE HAIHAI PIPPA POKKIE!!!
I truly cherish everyone's support so much , it means the entire world to me (ᗒᗣᗕ)՞ ♡♡ and it wont ever change no matter how many time I say it!! I really hope we can create a fun community where we can ogle and laugh together hehe.. ミヽ(。><)ノ
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He’d naturally match their energy, always knowing when to be quietly supportive or playful, depending on how they feel. He wouldn’t just tolerate their energy shifts—he’d find them endearing, loving every side of the MC. When they seem more drained or quiet, he’d see it as an opportunity to give them extra love, like wrapping them up in a cozy burrito of affection! To him, those moments make the MC even more special, and he'd cherish every bit of who they are, especially their burrito moments ଘ(✿˵•́ ᴗ •̀˵)
He’d find it absolutely heartwarming, especially since he had his own comfort plush in the past. Plushies that look like bunnies would make him smile and reminisce about his own, bringing back fond memories. He’d definitely find the MC’s plush adorable and feel an extra sense of connection over that shared experience (ᗒᗣᗕ)՞ ♡♡
Oh, absolutely! He would definitely binge-watch anime with the MC. If there’s a yandere character, you’d catch him giving a quiet nod of approval, LOL. But his real favorites are the ones that involve cooking! Watching all the delicious food would make him want to recreate those dishes for the MC. Besides anime, he’s also a huge fan of cooking shows in general! (ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧
Anselm enjoys classical music with slow, calming tones. I'm planning to create two playlists soon—one that reminds him of the MC, and another that he can listen to during his operating hours!
No need to be sorry! I'm always happy to answer all your question to the best of my abilities ♡(◕ᗜ◕✿) . And thank you for loving Anselm !! You take care pookie!! ★~(◠‿◕✿)
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heartfullofleeches · 1 year ago
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Y/N talking to their audience: “*Sigh* Nothings happened yet we’ve been here for hours!! …..Pfft- Hey you guys, how about we try a challenge to pass the time? If you guys give me 50 subs in an hour I’ll decide to give your favourite camera person Tobi a kiss on the cheek!”
Tobi overhearing Y/N: :) !!!!
Y/N: “Hehe it’d be funny if that actually happened right? I’ve never gotten that many subs during a stream ever- WOAH!!” Suddenly Y/N receives 500 subs all at once
Y/N: “Oh- Oh my god!! Tobi look at what just happened this is insane!!!”
Tobi patiently waiting for their kiss: :) :) :)
"Seven...eight... nine... Hey Tobi - How many did you see upstairs again?"
The camera man holds three fingers up.
"That makes twelve.... Dang it." Nudging a rotting rocking chair with your foot, you join Tobi's side on the floor as they fiddles with their camera seemingly unordered by the predicament you were now in.
Tonight was supposed to be your big break. According to leads, if you counted the number of doors in this house aloud a thirteen door would appear as a gate to the word beyond your own and its inhabitants would snatch mortals foolish enough to seek its knowledge. With your trust cameraman at your side - you weren't worried about a thing, but to your disappointment no ghost or demons had come to drag you kicking and screaming beyond the veil.
Truth be told, Tobi had found this doorway hours before the scheduled stream. They'd torn it to chips and now used it to light the fireplace keeping you warm they also had the time to clean out before you arrived. In their eyes, things were better this way. The natural moonlight created the perfect scene to film you in as did most lights. They had already filled the remaining storage on one memory card and well into the next. To them - this had been one of the best hunts you had by fair.
Sighing, you sit up face the live camera. "Sorry, guys. Really thought we had something tonight. If you're disappointed by the lack of quality content - I can always give Tobi a kiss on the cheek....if they'd be comfortable with it.
And it was about to get even better.
The comments flood in like the racing waters of a broken dam.
"I'm sure they would."
"Who couldn't want a kiss from you?"
"Kiss. Kiss. Kiss."
"That's just the excitement they we need."
"Look at how excited they are. Don't play with their heartstrings like that, Y/n?"
You glance over at Tobi who was sitting with their hands folded in their lap and freshly groomed. They wave, fixing their coat sleeve as it falls, and adjusts their camera to capture you both in frame as you turn back.
"Alright, then... Hm, let's make a challenge of it - if we reach fifty subs in...."
" :) had donated 100 subs."
"Palemoonlight :) has gifted 250 subs."
"Three hundred already!? G-guys, I haven't even -"
"Trustycameraperson :) has donated 500 subs."
"Pleasekissmealready :) :) has donated a 1,000 subs."
"Okay, okay I get it!" You scoot over to Tobi and take both of their hands, wordless asking for the go ahead. They nod furiously, almost flinging their baseball cap off their head. They adjust it as you lean in and press a soft kiss to their cheek, reaching an arm around their neck to stable yourself. Their cool skin ignites beneath the touch of your warm skin. The light on their camera blocks rapidly before fizzing out as the fire within the furnace lick its brick walls and bellow from its grates. You pull away as embers jump at the blanket you sat on, stopping them out before the flames spread.
"Whoa! Something must've fell in there. You alright, Tobi?"
The moonlight reveals the goofy grin Tobi wears. They shouldn't be greedy, but the night is so beautiful and young - just like you.
"Foreverurs :) donated 1 sub - how many more for a kiss on the lips? :)"
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xxsycamore · 3 months ago
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JOYRIDE
╰┈➤ 💕MC has always dreamed about Arthur taking her for a drive, almost as much as Arthur himself has. But once the opportunity arises, they both seem to be having other ideas...
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Arthur Conan Doyle x MC • rating: E (MDNI) • tags: Car Sex; Modern Era; Public Sex; pretty sure they're breaking at least a few moral AND actual laws in this; Kissing; Not Wearing Underwear; Teasing; Clothed Sex; Riding; Blow Jobs; Oral Sex; Come Swallowing • wordcount: 2,241 • masterlist
a/n: Also titled "Arthur driving (me insane)". I love his card, I'm sorry.
Part of my Sexy Ikemen Summer Creation Challenge. Prompts: In the car while traveling + Forgo underwear on the date
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"Soo… what do we think?"
MC crosses her legs, angling herself just a little more in Arthur's direction so she won't miss all the intriguing little changes happening on his face. He's just finished spending a handful of seconds being stunned speechless, admiring the car's outer appearance before joining her inside. He places his hands on the steering wheel to get a better feeling of it, marine blue eyes sparkling with the wonder of a child receiving a shiny new toy on Christmas morning. They don't lose their spark one bit when landing on MC, head shaking in disbelief.
"Luv, you're absolutely bonkers. What did you do?"
She chuckles, smoothing out the front of her skirt that has ridden up just a bit from the motion of crossing her legs. It's actually a good sign that Arthur has just missed that, he must truly be captivated by her little surprise.
"I rented it! I know how much you love to drive and… I always thought it was such a shame that we're living in such an early age of car manufacturing. But now that we can freely travel through the door, I can finally help you go for a drive just like you remember it! Well, not exactly how you remember it, but…"
The MGA convertible they're currently seated in is a 1957 model, meaning it came out a couple of decades after his death, but practically is the closest thing available to his beloved dark green 16-horse-power Dietrich-Lorraine. MC even found one in the same color. Arthur's cheeks must be hurting by now but the grin is yet to fall from his face. He's busy checking out everything on the dashboard, testing buttons and adjusting the rearview mirror.
"A modern masterpiece! By Jove, how unbelievable it is that I'm going to drive this thing! MC, dear, I— Come here."
Rejuvenated by the taste of "modernity", Arthur grabs the back of MC's head to pull her in for a kiss charged with utter joy, excitement, and lots of thankfulness, of course. She's happy to catch the master of the pen being out of words, burning this sight into her memory. Actually, that's exactly what she bought a camera for. Click! Arthur, now back to his business, doesn't even register the sealing of the memory, probably due to the absence of the flash. It only makes the capture more natural-looking, and MC is satisfied with that.
"MC, thank you so much. I'm such a lucky man. And you terribly outdid yourself, you little rascal!"
Putting away the camera somewhere just close enough for some more on-the-spot memories to be sealed, MC leans in and puts a peck on Arthur's cheek, feeling her own sides beginning to heat up.
"Don't thank me just yet, wait until we get that baby on the road! I did promise you a surprise for your birthday that would come a little later in the summer, on our next trip to the 21st century… I'm cheating a little by indulging in your joy here, you know? Because of how I've always dreamed of you taking me for a drive like this, hehe…"
It would be interesting to show Arthur what a truly modern automobile looks like, but she figured that would be too much of a headache for him just yet. Besides, she prefers it if he can actually drive the thing without it ending in a crash.
It's illegal either way, and they're both aware of that, with Arthur not possessing any documents, but it's a risk they're willing to take. And Comte totally didn't tell them not to worry about that, in a very cryptic fashion. But just to make sure, they opt for a rural highway once they pull off, and make it a point to stay extra alert.
"You know what else I'm thinking about?"
Feeling the wind in her hair, MC's soft hum of interest comes a bit tardy as she's too occupied by their cruising. This only results in her slightly jumping in her seat the moment a delicate warm hand snakes its way to her exposed knee.
"Fooling around in a car with you."
She takes her eyes off the road to instead regard the audacity of that devious hand, her widened eyes then trailing to the culprit behind the steering wheel. And his shit-eating grin.
"Arthur…"
Heartbeat speeding up as his fingerpads dip under her skirt and dig into the inside of her thigh, MC can't help pressing her legs together to trap his hand in between. It's the far opposite of what she'd liked her reaction to be, with such a reckless distraction… Oh, but Arthur's own eyes are on the road, and he prides himself in being able to please a woman even with his eyes closed, and the bubbles of adrenaline pop and fuzz low in her belly and morph into something more tangible and liquid…
"Would you look at that, luv? A dirt road I could easily go onto and find a good place to pull off. Or we can drive by it and keep chit-chatting, it's entirely your call. But do make up your mind quickly!"
Alarms go off in MC's mind as she struggles to come out of the daze, and it's hard when Arthur's implication only puts her deeper in there. Just how did their scenic drive come to this?
"Pull off."
Arthur drums the wheel with his other hand, visibly pleased with her decision. In another minute the car's engine goes quiet and the world inside MC's head only gets louder, as she's being pulled into Arthur's lap.
Albeit cramped, the luxurious interior of the car makes it possible for such acrobatics, much to MC's surprise, as the leather front seat is wide and not disjointed like in modern cars. Her knees sink down on each side of Arthur as he begins feeling her up - grabbing handfuls of her ass and making her skirt hike up, then following the dips of her sides up to her breasts and bringing them in closer to his face. He's at the perfect height to bury his face in her bosom, yet the vampire in him always gets more distracted by her delectable nape. He licks a wet stripe across it, feeling the call of her blood pulse alluringly under the wet muscle. But they wouldn't want to make too much mess now, would they?
"Still up for a ride, dove?"
Arthur rocks MC's body down on his groin and puts a barely needed emphasis on what his offer entails. The soft whine that leaves her lips is like music to Arthur's ears, and he already wants to make her sing for him more. That's why he loses little time leaving those tantalizing caresses where the skin isn't burning to the touch with need, and his hand ends up fully under her skirt, cupping her hot arousal.
And to his surprise, there's no barrier separating his touch from her core.
"My, someone planned this? I can't believe you tricked me into thinking all you wanted was an innocent little drive!"
She knew this moment would come, yet now all her comebacks are forgotten with only a guilty little laugh leaving her curled-up lips. While seducing him so boldly was on the list for their date, she was thinking more of some nice and secluded spot for this to happen, preferably away from the vehicle…
MC grinds down on his palm, even if the morsel of pleasure quickly leaves her starving for more. She could get off of his lap, demand they put the roof on, push him down on the seat, do anything that will ease this feeling of committing the forbidden, laced with plenty of embarrassment on top. But alas, thrill prevails.
"Nnh… Take me now Arthur, don't waste any time…!"
Ignoring the inevitable teasing little "oh?" coming from her boyfriend, MC reaches underneath her to undo Arthur's belt. She likes his outfit for their date, grey trousers and a brown leaf-print shirt, a pair of sunglasses tucked casually in the crux of his undone upper three buttons. MC briefly considers moving them out of harm's way, to his handsome face for instance, but then his beautiful eyes would be obscured, and that'd be such a shame…
Arthur's own hands intrude to get the job done even faster, and once his cock springs out aching and throbbing, he guides her soft fingers to wrap around it.
He's quick to claim her lips as soon as her face is in close proximity, angled down to look at the growing hardness she's stoking, and the sweetness of her mouth only enhances the sensation but he can't not kiss her breathless. MC moans in his mouth, the clenching of her core becoming more agonizing with the promise of what's to come making itself known hot and heavy in her tight fist.
"Do you want to put it in yourself, little bird?"
Oh, she sees now. Arthur is making her embrace the act completely, to finish what she's started until he can come out clean in the end… It's more than a little unfair at this point. But perhaps this is not such a bad thing.
Letting go of Arthur's hot mouth with a last little suckle of his tongue, MC pins down his gaze as she secures a hand on his shoulder, ascending from her seat ever so slightly.
After an adjustment of her position, the tip of his cock comes to rest snuggly against her swollen lips and MC sways her hips softly. She uses her hand to guide it in, or at least pretends to, because as soon as the head begins to breach the leaking hole of her opening, MC pulls it out again.
"Mm…Naughty girl… don't tease now. Be nice."
Instead of falling for his husky whispering and quickly complying, MC keeps her act on. The next time she catches Arthur's gaze, his eyes are half-lidded and the cheekiness is wiped off his face.
His quiet hiss of anticipation motivates MC and she gets a little bit ahead of herself - because that's just what Arthur has waited for, and he uses the opportunity of the new shallow penetration to grab her by the waist and press down. Slowly but insistingly.
"Ahhh—Arthur-"
They both watch his cock disappear inside her, with MC throwing her head back once he bottoms out. Arthur groans at the tightness enveloping him, kissing her exposed neck.
"See? It was easy. Don't deny your desires, luv." His little noisy pecks should be calming her senses down but the fire inside her has only spread further. She figures it's about time for her to take the reins, and using Arthur's shoulders for leverage, she begins bouncing in his lap, settling an ambitious pace right away.
Arthur rests his arm on the door, admiring her as the expression on her face grows lewder by the second, struggling to keep up with the explosive waves of pleasure hitting her one after another yet still stubbornly fucking herself on his cock.
"Haah- So fast… You're going to make me come, luv."
The sudden squeezing he feels around his cock makes a brand new grin bloom on Arthur's face, and he's quick to move his other hand downwards and see if she can keep going when he doubles the pleasure. MC all but screams at the feeling of his fingers rubbing her clit in rhythm with her own thrusts, unable to do anything but to embrace the orgasm that rips through her like lightning.
Arthurs coos at her blissed-out face, even if he's barely holding himself back from joining her in the climax. Only when she falls completely out of rhythm does he take it upon himself to seize control, but just as he opens his mouth to warn of his upcoming orgasm MC unexpectedly gets completely off of him.
Arthur's deep-sea blue eyes follow her movements until her head suddenly descends and hovers over his twitching cock, her mouth opening to take him in. He can do little but remain where he is as she coaxes a powerful orgasm out of him with ease, her plush lips closing around his tip and enthusiastically sucking the seeping currents as they come one by one.
The moan that carries her name is etching itself into her very heart, with just a little spark of arousal to it that she can ignore for the time being. Arthur places his hand gently under her chin, but he can't help himself prodding at her bottom lip with his thumb just for a glimpse of the fluids coating her tongue.
She sticks it out for him but as a mockery more than anything, to accompany the cheekiness of laying her head across his lap - everything already swallowed and gone. Arthur props up his head on his arm with his elbow still resting on the door of the car, and the summer day's heat has made a sweaty mess of the hairlocks falling on his forehead. MC gets a good look at his handsome face from her new point of view, nuzzling into his hand that is still caressing her face. For some reason, they're both feeling giddy.
"So then luv, if we're done being a pair of horny teenagers, should we continue with our little joyride?"
"I don't know what you're talking about, we haven't paused for a bit!"
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kneelingshadowsalome · 1 year ago
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We know Konig is more soft on women, but is it all women in general? For example, if some girl was hitting on him, would he be rough with her? Would he ever kill a woman? (if he's on the battlefield - I'm guessing he would if he had to). Is he chivalrous to all women or just his partner?
Yes, König is absolutely super soft to all women in general 🌸
The thing is, women are an exception, a beautiful, pure anomaly in König's worldview. He both worships them and views them as fragile. Women need to be protected from all harm. And at the same time... König goes feral every time he gets to taste and touch and fu–ahem, make love to a woman.
CW: Toxic!König. Sexism. Mentions of canon-typical violence and PTSD. Freudian madness.
Something just snaps, and he doesn't want to hurt his Engel... but he's a bit ADHD, and far too needy, goes a bit crazy every time he sees her. Women's soft skin and plump breasts and hot, wet, silky folds drive him insane. He just wants to drown himself in a woman, hide somewhere deep, somewhere safe, but can't because he's so big and has to act all tough. If he could, if only he was allowed, he would fall asleep every night with his cock buried inside that beautiful, warm, velvet softness.
So König's deeply embedded insecurity and attempts to seek safety are a combination that make him a little unhinged when it comes to women. That's why he can never get enough 😔 Also this man's horrible childhood has made him an adrenaline addict. Chaos is what he's used to, it feels familiar, so there's a risk that König might never settle into safety even if he finds it. He needs a high (which means he needs to kill and he needs sex.)
Female operators are skilled and tough in his eyes, and he trusts their abilities (kind of), but he would always keep a silent lookout, and try to keep them safe. Even if those women looked at him like he's a weirdo. He would always choose to help a woman over helping a man. Men can and have to survive on their own if a lady is in trouble. I know this wasn't asked but He would also never, ever hurt children.
If a woman tried to kill him (on the battlefield) he would be very professional about it. He wouldn't find joy in the killing, though. As odd as it may sound, König would prefer shooting to stabbing when it comes to neutralizing a female target. He wouldn't want to prolong their deaths, and it would make him extremely uncomfortable to knife a woman down. If he has to, he will do it, but the kill would be as quick and clean as possible.
The ones König has killed linger on the precipice of his mind as precious memories, sick fantasies made real. But the women he kills haunt him forever: those deaths sometimes give him nightmares. Especially if they brought even the tiniest bit of satisfaction...
...Because König does go into a mode when he's left with a firearm. He's so excited he sometimes drops mags simply because he's so enthusiastic. Thrill and anxiety mix when he's working, and he feels absolutely marvelous every time he fires a gun and gets to announce "Target down" in the comms. Better yet if he can go on a spree and destroy a whole room full of villains. Noticing later that one or some of them were women would give him a cold feeling in the gut and leave him with a worsening PTSD.
If a woman was violent in other circumstances, meaning outside work/warfare, he would simply seize them as gently and firmly as he can and try to calm them down. König thinks hitting women is just wrong. Even if they were trying to hit him (hitting on, as in flirting with him, now that's a different thing hehe. Not sure if this is what you asked, if so let me know!). It's unmanly and cowardly, and he would kill any guy who hits women, and kill them without mercy.
König's traumatic childhood has put him on a knight's quest to protect all women and children from harm. His mother has greatly influenced the way he sees women overall. At the end of the day, they're creatures who don't know how to defend themselves so he needs to save them.
But then again... These 'Knight in Shining Armor' fantasies should be taken with a grain of salt.
Because seeing a woman under him in a helpless state, looking back at him with cute, wet eyes while he's lodged deep inside is the best thing in the world in König's opinion. He would never deliberately go and hurt a woman... But why then does it feel so good when Engel squeals every time he goes a little too deep? (Always on accident, of course.)
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