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anotheronechicagobog · 5 years ago

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Mouse Gerwitz x reader Letters

written by @anotheronechicagobog

Requested by @confusedpimp

Warnings: swearing, mature themes, implied smut

A/N: I’m asexual and terrible at writing kissing scenes, so sorry if that part sucks. I’ve been sick, had school stuff going on, and had some writer’s block, so I really hope you like it!

(Not my gif)

When you first met Mouse you were sixteen, he, Jay, and Will were all back from being away. Jay was on his first leave from the Rangers and Will was back from Uni for winter break. After spending the full day with you and Will Jay decided to hangout with Mouse. You threw a fit over that, you’d spent over a year terrified that he’d come back in a body bag and that you deserved to spend the few weeks he was there with him. So instead he invited Mouse to hang out the three of you instead. He was handsome, funny, and a Harry Potter fan so you didn’t mind at all. The three of you went down to the boardwalk and just spent time together, talking, going to the river museum which wasn’t your thing in all honesty but it was more about being together than anything else, and ended the day with deep-dish pizzas at home and a movie marathon. It was when your dad came home drunk off his ass that the mood changed. Jay and Will suddenly remembered what they left you home with, and Mouse was sitting there awkwardly, not knowing what to say or do. You sent an apologetic smile his way and stood up. “Hey, dad, it’s time for bed. C’mon, I’ll sing to you again.” Your brothers exchanged shocked and horrified looks as they say you leading your very drunk, very handsy father, up the stairs quickly and efficiently. You’d learned how to handle yourself when your brothers were gone.

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When you returned downstairs you heard furious voices in the kitchen. You turned to Mouse who was sitting on the couch with wide-eyes. “I’m really sorry you had to watch that Mouse. You look really uncomfortable, can I get you something to eat or drink?”

“Uh... How often does that happen?”

“Why?” Mouse looked at you with guarded eyes. You were confused, Mouse sounded concerned and he didn’t really have any reason to be. Jay was your brother, not Mouse. “What do you mean ‘why’? That shouldn’t be happening to you.”

“Mouse, I only met you this morning so I’m a little surprised at your reaction.”

“Jay’s been showing me and the others pictures of you and sharing stories since basic training, he talks about you all the time, he’s so protective of you, it’s kinda rubbed off on the rest of us.” You nodded slowly, processing his answer. “Look, I get that my brother and his overprotective ways influenced you, but I can handle myself.” Mouse didn’t look convinced.

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After Mouse left you walked into the kitchen and jumped up onto the counter. The mood was thick and tense and you dreaded the conversation that was coming. “Alright, let’s get this conversation over with.”

“Are you being serious right now?” Jay huffed angrily and threw the dishtowel into the empty but still soapy sink. Will threw the remaining cutlery in the drawer and slammed it shut. “Why are you being so calm about this?”

“I didn’t want you guys to put your lives on hold. You two basically raised me, you’ve sacrificed enough. Yes, he’s been drinking more, yes he’s gotten handsy, but I can handle myself I promise.” Jay screwed his eyes shut and balled his hands into fists. “You should have told us.We’re supposed to take care of you.”

“And what could you have done Will? Jay’s been in the middle east fighting a war, and you’ve been in med school in Seattle. You’ve tried to get custody of me before and it fell through, we just have to face it, this is the situation for now. It sucks but its doable.”

“Are you kidding me?! ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?! Y/N, we are your big brothers, it’s our responsibility to help and protect you! You need to tell us when stuff like this starts, so that we can deal with whatever shit’s going on!” You sighed and watched Jay catch his breath.

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The rest of the boys’ stay was tense. They walked you to and from school, Mouse and some others in Jay’s unit were coming over to stay with you when your brothers couldn’t (including ‘introducing’ themselves to your father), and you were never left alone with your father. You were annoyed at all that your brother was orchestrating, but you were also low-key relieved you didn’t feel the need to barricade your door at night. Two days before Jay and Mouse were scheduled to head back you were introduced to Mouse’s family. His parents were wonderful and Katie was so freaking adorable. You’d all decided to go out to dinner to an Irish restaurant. Right before the Celtic band was set to play Mouse’s mom pulled you aside. “Sweetheart, Greg told us about your dad. We just want you to know that you’re always welcome with our family and at our home. Just call and we’ll be there as soon as possible. Okay?”

“Okay, thanks.”

When you both sat back down Mouse’s eyes caught yours and he smiled sheepishly. You smiled in return, feeling grateful about your overprotective brothers

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TWO YEARS LATER

You cheered silently as you skipped down the steps of your childhood home. You had all your possessions in your backpack and a small suitcase. You were finally eighteen, legally able to walk away without being dragged back. Greg’s family invited you to stay with them until you started university in the fall. They’d been a godsend over the years, to the point where you started sending letters to Mouse as well as Jay. While your brother initially thought it was weird but stopped complaining when Katie mailed him a picture of flowers she drew. Your relationship with Mouse grew.you swapped stories, created inside jokes, and confided in one another. For the next few months, you were going to be living in his old bedroom. It looked like how he left it.

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You sat on the edge of the bed and looked around the room you’d called home for the past few months. You were excited but apprehensive about starting university. Not just because of the daunting aura of university, but because of the financial aspects. You’d started applying for scholarships and bursaries before your application was even accepted. While you’d been awarded a decent amount of money, it wasn’t anywhere close to covering one semester, forget the rest of your academic career. So you’d turned to something your brothers would murder you for if they ever found out- being a stripper and a sugar baby.

In all honesty, it hadn’t been as bad as you’d expected. You’d found a website where you could... advertise yourself. You’d posted some nice photos of yourself, selfies where you’re smiling in a park and the boardwalk, and made it clear on your profile that sex was NOT on the table. It had taken you a while to find a sugar daddy, for that reason, but you’d found one and your... allowance was pretty good. You’d been contacted by a guy in his late 30’s who was gay and came from a very conservative family who expected a serious girlfriend. He wasn’t ready to come out, terrified of the backlash and possible violence he’d receive from his family, he decided to go another route. So while everyone thought you were moving into an apartment you were really moving in with your sugar daddy.

You’d have your own room, and were free to use any room in his apartment except for his ensuite bedroom and office. The same applied to him, he wasn’t allowed in your room either. He’d been nervous about the arrangement, much like yourself, and had offered to assist you in decorating your room, a kind offer you’d decided to accept to try and form a friendship with him. You’d need to be a convincing companion, after all.

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ONE YEAR LATER

“Well well well, if it isn’t the girl who put Van Gogh posters up in my room.”

“Mouse! It’s good to see you. You’re on leave with Jay, then? Also, who doesn’t like Starry Night?” You’d gone with Jay to hang out at a bar with him and some guys from his unit, Jay had gone off with a pretty blonde twenty minutes ago and hadn’t returned. Mouse smiled and took another swig of his beer. He sat down across from you, where Jay had been sitting and folded his hands together on top of the table. His arms were even more muscular than the last time you’d seen him. His shoulders were broader, he had a tan, and his eyes looked sharper. “So who’s the lucky guy? Everyone’s been writing that you’re seeing someone, and I know you, you don’t buy jewellery for yourself. Yet here you are, with a lovely necklace, dainty rings and bracelets. C’mon, spill.” Mouse looked tense, and his hands were clenched, almost like if they weren’t so tightly coiled together he’d be doing something else with them. “He’s none of your or anyone else’s business.” You smiled coyly at him and took another sip of your screwdriver. Mouse’s eyes flickered dangerously before going blank, a tense smile forcing its way onto his face. “Well alright, then. Let’s talk about something else.” You felt confused as Mouse started to ramble about the Blackhawks.

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Things seemed to be frosty between you and Mouse after your talk in the bar. Letters were still exchanged, but he wasn’t as open with you as he used to be. He stopped opening up to you, doodling goofy little cartoons in the margins, sweet words to you, monologuing about his goals and dreams (most of which involved you but you tried not to read too much into, despite how it made your heart flutter), and describing how badly he missed your famous chocolate cookies. You sighed, before placing his latest letter in the decorative box you’d gotten to keep them in. You gently placed that box next to your suitcase before returning to packing. You and George had ended your arrangement, he’d fallen in love with a wonderful man and now that things were serious, and that he felt ready to come out, you were moving out. You’d met him and surprisingly you two had developed a friendship, even with him knowing what you were to George. He’d thought it strange at first, but moved past it quickly when he considered the circumstances. And since he was a successful real estate agent, he’d volunteered himself to find you an apartment. The one you’d settled on was a steal and absolutely beautiful. Taping up the last box you were thankful that you didn’t have more belongings. The new furniture you’d purchased from IKEA was set to be delivered and put together tomorrow, deciding to leave most of your furniture with George since you weren’t overly attached to them and George had, y’know paid for them. So you were going to load your boxes and large suitcase into your car tonight and leave in the morning. Then the room you’d been living in would go back to being a guest room.

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The sound and smell of sizzling filled your apartment as you cooked up some sausages to accompany your toast and boiled egg for breakfast. They were almost done cooking when there was a knock on your door. Leaving them on the element for a moment you went and opened it. Surprised to see your brother standing there. “Jay! Will! What are you guys doing here?”

“We came to visit your new place, you know, since you actually told us the address this time.”

“Oh come on, you’re not both still on that, are you? I just didn’t want your overprotective asses descending on my life all the time!”

“Hey! Is that any way to talk to the guys who brought doughnuts?”

“Is that any way to talk to the chick who cooked sausages that she’s willing to share with her brothers?”

“Touche.”

“So why are you guys really here? We were supposed to have shepherd’s pie and stuff tonight.”

“Well, we are here in part to celebrate because I got assigned to Chicago Med and Jay is finally back after getting medically discharged.”

“Also, I was wondering if you’d heard from Mouse.”

“What? No, I haven’t, did something happen?” You stomach dropped and ice bolted up your spine.

“He didn’t handle everything well. After he was allowed to leave the facility, no one’s heard from him. Not even his family. We were wondering if he’d contacted you.”

“No, he hasn’t contacted me. I don’t know why you thought he would, we’re not very close.” Jay narrowed his eyes at you. “Then why were you exchanging letters with him while we were overseas? You don’t do that with someone you don’t care about.”

“He was out there with you Jay. It felt good to talk to someone I know had your back, he was willing to tell me things about you and that was going on that you wouldn’t. We formed a friendship for a while,” Jay and Will let out a snort, you raised your eyebrow, “but things got cold a while ago. He stopped telling me stuff about himself, the genuine things we corrisponded about.” You sighed. “Why are you acting like I’m super close to him?”

“Oh come on, don’t tell me you don’t know.” You shrugged and shook your head, feeling completely confused. “Mouse fell in love with you.” He and Will jumped when they heard glass shatter. You’d dropped your mug when you heard the shocking news. You could feel your jaw hanging open and your heart pounding in your ears.

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FOUR MONTHS LATER

You were cursing under your breath, your first date since high school stood you up in a pretty bad part of town, huddling closer to yourself, trying to remain unseen. Your plan had failed though, as a hooded man had been following you for the past thee blocks, even circled one behind you. You were officially scared. You were thinking of a plan to attack him that didn’t result in you get raped and/or murdered when you ran into someone. “Sorry, I have to go-”

“Y/N?”

“Mouse? What are you doing here?”

“The question is what are you doing here? You shouldn’t be here.”

“I’d like to catch up with you but there’s a guy following me-”

“Blackhawks hoodie covering his face? I see him. I’ve got you.” He wrapped his arms around your shoulders and started to direct you down the street. “Let’s get you home.”

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Mouse was sitting at your kitchen island with a coffee and grilled cheese in front of him. His face looked shallow, he had bags around his eyes, he looked like he hadn’t had a decent meal in ages and he couldn’t stop fidgeting. You didn’t need to look at his arms to know that there would be track marks. “Jay’s been worried about you. So have I. You dropped off the radar.”

“It’s my life not his.”

“I know.”

“So... You moved.”

“Yes.”

“You and your boyfriend broke up?”

“Yeah, we did, he wasn’t really my boyfriend, though, that’s a story for another time. How have you been, Mouse, really?”

“It’s complicated.”

“Whatever you say. What have you been doing?”

“Please don’t pull that with me Y/N. I know you can tell that I’ve been doing drugs.”

“I know we’re not as close as we used to be, but I’m here for you, okay? I miss you and what we had. Let me help you. I’ll even leave Jay out of it if you want, I know he can be kind of over bearing.”

“Okay.”

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EIGHT MONTHS LATER

Mouse was curled up on your couch with you stroking his hair. Therapy had taken a lot out of him and he just wanted to be held. You obliged, letting him rest his head on your lap and running your fingers through his hair. He wasn’t moving or making any noise, and he was cold to the touch. If you didn’t know any better you would’ve thought he was on death’s door and called for help. After escorting you home from the disaster of a stand up, you’d gotten close again. Mouse went to rehab for six months and while he wasn’t using anymore it was clear he was still struggling so you’d suggested therapy with the VA. He’d been hesitant, and you hadn’t wanted to push, but he realized you were just trying to help him the best way you knew how. This included letting him live with you and not telling Jay you knew where he was. Mouse hadn’t wanted to ask that of you but he felt much more comfortable with as little pressure on him as possible. You sat like that for hours. Surrounded by silence, the only movement in the room was your hand going in soothing rounded movements along his scalp. You stopped when Mouse started to sit up. “I’m feeling like Thai food tonight, how about you?”

“That sounds like heaven, Y/N. I’m going to take a quick shower.” He dropped a kiss on your forehead and padded down the hall to the bathroom. You placed your usual order and then took a moment to dwell on your current living situation. Mouse meant a lot to you, but he also meant a lot to Jay, and not telling Jay he wasstaying here could seriously damage your relationship. And your relationship with Mouse was shifting too. Your apartment was only one bedroom, so while Mouse had started with sleeping on the pull-out couch, it hadn’t stayed that way. He’d found you comforting and since his nightmares often woke you up and prompted you to stay with him anyway, you’d started going to bed together. You’d made space for his things in your dresser and closet. All that with the subtle intimate gestures it made you feel like you were dating, and it had dragged all of your buried feelings back into the spotlight. It killed you to be so close, to be tangled in one another, to have your faces so close, and not being able to express how much you loved him. Crushing on your older brother’s brother in arms was one thing, but what the two of you were doing now was something else. Your thoughts were interrupted by the doorbell. You were sitting the food on the island when Mouse stepped out of the bathroom in jeans and... nothing else. His lean chest and arms were exposed, they reminded you of the warmth you felt when he used those arms to pull you close and tuck your head into the crook of his neck. You swallowed thickly and forced yourself to turn away. “Are you okay, Y/N? You’re looking a bit flushed.”

“Yeah, the food’s hot, that’s all.”

“Alright, if you’re sure.”

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BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP

The monotone sound of your alarm blared into your ear, reminding you that you had class. You moved to get out of bed but were held in place by Mouse’s -deceptively- strong arms. “It’s early. Stay.”

“I can’t, today’s my last class before my thesis is due.”

“No.”

“Greg.”

“Oh, it’s ‘Greg’ now is it? When will you be back?”

“Twelve-thirty.”

“Let’s meet somewhere for lunch.”

“Diner?”

“Diner.”

“Alright, now that that’s settled, let me go.”

“Fine. But I want it made very clear that I would rather be holding you against me.”

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Class dragged on and you were glad when it ended. Your thesis was already complete, all you had to do was meet with your supervisor to go over it. You stretched your neck to try and remove some of the tension as you stood on the bus that was heading in the direction of your and Mouse’s favourite diner. A small family-owned place that was run by a single mom and her two kids, one of whom was a firefighter at firehouse 51. You got off at your stop and entered the diner, you spotted Mouse almost immediately. He was facing the door and smiled, gesturing to the two cups of coffee on the table. The sight made all the remaining tension evaporate.

Lunch with Mouse always relieved some stress, talking to him, being with him, made everything better. Always. Your burgers were served promptly and with a twinkling smile from Peter. The exchange was not missed by Mouse who muttered under his breath, as he did every time Peter was your server. “Mouse, why do you always do that?”

“What? Get annoyed when he flirts with you while I’m sitting right here?”

“We’re not dating Mouse, why does it matter if he flirts with me?” He tensed and swept his tongue over his lower lip. Taking a deep breath he sat up straighter in his seat and looked you in the eyes. “I don’t like it because I do want to date you, and I know that wanting to date you isn’t the same as actually dating you, but he knows how I feel about you. His mom pulled it out of me when I was doing a freelance job on my laptop here a couple of weeks ago and not only was he standing right beside her, but he told me that he thought we’d make a cute couple.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah... I get it if you don’t feel about me like that, I mean I’m a train wreck-”

“Mouse.”

“Jay would kill me-”

“Mouse.”

“I’m not good enough for you-”

“Mouse!”

“Y/N, please stop interrupting me. I just, I get that you don’t love me back and that’s okay and completely understandable.”

“Mouse I love you.” He gazed at you softly, reached his hand had closed around yours gently. “Do you mean it?” His voice was deep and soulful. “Yes. Mouse, I love you.”

“Thank God.” He leaned across the table and enclosed his lips around yours. His hands were delicately cradling your face, your heart swelled. All you could do was wrap your arms around your neck and smile into his lips. When you parted neither you nor Mouse could stop beaming.

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ONE YEAR LATER

Three months after your first kiss with Mouse he decided to get back in contact with Jay. Your brother had responded by tackling him in a bear hug, getting him a job at intelligence as the tech guy, and waving off your apology citing that you brought out the best in Mouse. While you and Mouse were still going strong and continued to love each other with everything you have, neither of your brothers knew. The only people who knew were Sarah Reese, your best friend, Trudy Platt, because she’s a genius, and Voight, because that man knows everything. They all encouraged you to tell your siblings, and you wanted to, you really did, but Mouse didn’t want to. He said he just wanted to enjoy your little bubble a while longer, but in truth, you knew he felt guilty about dating his best friend’s baby sister.

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ONE YEAR LATER

You and Mouse still hadn’t told your brothers, while more members of med, PD and firehouse 51 knew, they were all sworn to secrecy. You wanted to tell your brothers. You wanted to be able to kiss your boyfriend when you visited the precinct at lunch, to hold hands without Mouse looking over your shoulders. It was starting to wear on you honestly, but you still loved him. And you understood that the time really just hadn’t been right recently. You both had agreed to tell them, but then catastrophe after catastrophe prevented you from doing so.

Sarah was frog-marching you to the ED because you’d been throwing up violently almost non-stop for days and was furious when she found out you hadn’t told Mouse you were sick just because he had a case. “Sarah-”

“No. You’re sick. Something’s wrong, and if you don’t get checked out I’ll tell Will and then he’ll drag you down here.”

“I was going to say you’re right this definitely isn’t a little stomach bug, that I’m grateful for you as a friend, and that your goddamn claws are digging into my shoulder, but okay.” Her hand fell from your shoulder, you rubbed it tenderly as the pain flared. “Sorry, I’m just getting really worried.”

“I know, I am too. Because I realized upstairs before you made the decision to manhandle me down here, that I haven’t gotten my period in two months.”

“Fuck.”

“Yup, that’s how I ended up here.” She rolled her eyes and hooked her elbow in yours. “I call godmother.”

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“Hi Y/N, what’s wrong?”

“Nat, I think I’m pregnant.”

“Well okay, then. We’ll do an ultrasound while we wait for your blood test results.” You lifted up your shirt and tried to control your nervous breathing. “This might be a little cold, okay.” She pressed the gel-covered wand on your abdomen. She smiled and turned to you. “Congratulations, you’re seven weeks pregnant.” You let out a sigh and looked at the monitor your brother’s wife had turned towards you. Your heart felt so full, remembering Mouse’s numerous comments about what he thought your children would look like. The moment of peace and joy was disturbed when Will, in his regular clothes, pushed the curtain aside. “Hey, Nat I need- Y/N? Why are you here? And- oh god. You’re pregnant, you’re- how are you pregnant? Y/N?” Will was in full freak out mode and he wasn’t paying any heed to Nat who was doing her best to calm him down. Sarah accidentally chose that moment to distractedly walk into the room. “Y/N I found the cutest way to tell Mouse you’re pregnant on pinterest-”

“Mouse?! Mouse knocked you up?! Does Jay know? Forget it, I’m going to kill him.” He stormed out of the room and ED, presumably to confront your boyfriend at PD.

“Shit, I didn’t think he’d be here, I’m sorry Y/N.”

“It’s okay, I have to get to the precinct before Will does.”

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After pleading with your boss to let you go early, citing a family emergency, you rushed to the precinct and to Trudy’s desk. “Will’s upstairs isn’t he?”

“Got here a minute before you did, what’s wrong?”

“He found out about me and-”

“Say no more. Head on up.”

You took the stairs two at a time and ran into the bullpen to a full-on screaming match between Will, Jay, and Mouse. “Back the fuck up Will! Jay doesn’t get to make this decision for me and neither do you!”

“NO WAY GREG! NO WAY IN FUCKING HELL!”

“Will, calm down, he’s my best friend and I don’t want him to reenlist either but there’s no need to yell like that.”

“YES THERE FUCKING IS! GREG GERWITZ YOU ARE NOT RUNNING OFF TO THE RANGERS AFTER KNOCKING UP Y/N!”

“What?! Mouse, you did what?! YOU HAD SEX WITH MY BABY SISTER?!”

“DOES SHE EVEN KNOW YOU’RE GOING BACK TO THE RANGERS OR WERE YOU PLANNING ON TELLING HER BEFORE ASKING FOR A RIDE TO THE AIRPORT?!”

“HOW DARE YOU HAVE SEX WITH Y/N-”

“You’re reenlisting with the rangers?” Your voice was so quiet you weren’t sure how the three arguing men heard you but they did, as well as the rest of intelligence who were huddled in the break room. You were shaking and your vision was blurring from tears. You’d spent years worrying about him, as well as Jay. You didn’t think you could handle that, especially not now. You felt light-headed and like you needed to lie down. “No, I’m not.” Mouse crossed the room to you quickly, guiding you into Antonio’s chair and holding your face in his loving hands. With the pads of his thumbs, he wiped away your tears. “No, I’m not reenlisting. I got the offer from my old SO, I briefly considered it before chucking that idea out the window because I don’t want to leave you, Y/N. The only reason I haven’t outright told Jay, and consequently the rest of intelligence, is because they were trying to control my decision. I was never going to go, I won’t leave you, especially not now. How are you feeling sweetheart? Do you need something to eat or drink?” Still shaken up, you could only sniffle out, “I don’t know,” before bursting into tears. You felt him bend down more and wrap himself around you. He ran his hands comfortingly up and down your back while murmuring words of reassurance to you. “I’m right here.” “I don’t ever want to leave you.” “I love you so damn much sweetheart.” “I want to spend the rest of our lives together.” “I love you.” You finally lifted your head out of the crook of his neck, and looked into the gentle eyes you love so much. “I’m pregnant.” He smirked playfully. “I heard.” Laughter escaped your lips before you could realize his joke wasn’t all that funny. He pressed his forehead to yours. “We’re going to be parents.”

“Yeah, we are.” Mouse captured your lips in a loving, searing kiss that was interrupted by someone, or someone’s, ‘aheming’ right next to you. Still tangled with Mouse you turned to your brothers, “how do you guys feel about being uncles?”

“We feel great but,” Will looked at Jay who finished the thought you knew they were both dying to ask, “are you going to explain any of this to us?”

399 notes · View notes

iheartsunset · 4 years ago

Note

Do you have any headcanons about cooper?

Papa Louie Cooper HCs

(Okay I know I said I was kinda on hiatus cause of school, but the hurricane warning have cancelled school for most of the week, so I’m temporarily back! After this though I don’t think I’ll be able to post too much 😢)

-Cooper Stripey is 23 years old and lives with his beloved cat, Cookie, in a Tastyville apartment building atop one of his favorite restaurants. His parents live with his younger brother, Greg, in a small house close by, but Greg always lives to spend the night in his apartment. While he works happily at the Pancakeria, Cooper does have dreams of becoming a real estate agent.

-His lasts name, Stripey, stems from tomatoes. He often referred to as Mr. Stripey, which is an unripe looking tomato with small leaves. Cooper thinks this is embarrassing, but Greg is overjoyed at its meaning, so he’s learning to bear with it for his brother’s sake.

-He is in a polyamorous relationship with Prudence and Taylor. He met Prudence when Papa allowed them to pick up their pets at the empty Pancakeria and agreed to become coworkers to return the favor. He and Taylor have been friends since middle school and were on the same baseball team once. They all began dating after Taylor admitted that he had feelings for them both and didn’t know what to do about it, and since they all liked each other, they just all started dating. It’s one of Flipline’s best and most wholesome couples.

-He’s totally had ideas for a Kairi, Riku, and Sora costume for him and his S/O’s. Either that or Nagito, Hajime, and Chiaki costumes.

-Cooper totally has both the special hoodie and the backpack that you can carry your cat around in. Cookie doesn’t even need it since they always follow Cooper around and won’t stray from him unless there’s a squirrel or something.

-He’s a really goofy guy that always has a smile on his face. While he’s not on Mitch and Kingsley levels of wacky, Cooper does like to tell jokes and worry about other too much. I’d say he’s adorkable, but not on Roy’s level. He’s also charismatic, but not nearly as smooth as Carlo Romano. However, there are times where he will get into someone’s face if they’ve wronged his friends or family in any way (but absolutely not on Koilee or Rudy’s level of “I’m gonna kick your ass”). He’s just a great balance of all the workers’ personalities.

-Cooper can’t understand Cookie, but he still has full on conversations with both Cookie and Pickles.

-He accidentally dropped a camera down the mountain while taking pictures for Greg and his parents.

-Cooper has severe arachnophobia stemming from narrowly surviving an unnoticed bite from a brown recluse. Even though he says he’s fine, Cooper will run out of the Pancakeria or the apartment screaming if he sees a spider. When he, Prudence, and Willow were talking about their pets, Willow (unaware of his phobia) decided that Cooper should meet her spider face-to-face. Cooper fainted and now Willow doesn’t even make eye contact with him anymore out of guilt.

-He definitely uses this embarrassing baby voice when talking to his cat. Greg thinks it’s super weird, but has learned to put in headphones during those times.

-Cooper is always worried that he might accidentally leave one of his significant other’s out. Therefore, he makes Prudence and Taylor sit in the back of the car. He also insists that they all sit on the same side of the booth, which is really awkward, so they usually double date with Liezel and Trishna, Carlo and Koilee, or Willow and Drakson.

-He likes to blast embarrassing music when he picks Greg up from school. He also plays harmless pranks on him and teases him like an older brother would. Greg does all the same things to him and overall, they have a normal sibling relationship.

-His favorite game series are Kingdom Hearts and Final Fantasy. He has gone on stream with Tohru playing these games many times. He even made a cardboard Keyblade for his Halloween costume as Sora.

-Cooper, as a child, used to give leftover pancakes and bacon to this stray cat near his house. The cat grew so attached to Cooper that he decided to adopt it and name it Cookie (he didn’t think pancake rolled off the tongue as good as cookie did).

-His favorite anime genre is horror or psychological, so Higurashi and Happy Sugar Life are his favorites. Oddly enough, he hates monster movies and slasher films and will cry through them.

-Cooper’s car is sometimes not strong enough to drive up the freaking mountain, so Cooper often has to hike up it with Prudence to get to work on time. It really sucks and now Cooper dreads waking up in the morning.

-He hates when people say he looks just like Makoto Naegi or Hajime Hinata because deep down, he knows it’s true. But if you say he looks like Sora, he’ll be one of your best friends.

-The Fan Kids (Sarge Fan, Radlynn, LePete, and I guess Yippy and Iggy count since they all hang out together) low key scare him, but they’re Greg’s friends, so he’ll happily endure.

#my hcs #flipline studios #papa louie #flipline #cooper #cooper is a cat whisperer #theres a hurrican in my town

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qisasqisasqisas · 5 years ago

Text

C10: I meeaan, ‘None of your Business’

Nerede kalmıştık?

S+J+E+YT: “Yeah right? What is it? / YT: “Adın sanın nedir gızım senin? İki oyna da şurada bir görelim nesin necisin.”

A: “mm…”

Öncelikle Yıldız ablanın son yorumunu dikkate almamaya çalışacağım belli ki fazla içmiş. Sonrasında bana doğru belertilmiş 4 çift gözü de yok sayacak olursam arkamı dönüp kulüpten çıkmış olmam çok da anormal sayılmaz. Tam o sırada kolumu tutan Jim gözümü gözümden alır.

J.M:” We need to talk.” der ama yüzü yere bakar utancından. Neden olduğundan emin olamam ama yine de sorarım nedenini.

A: “About what?”

J.M:” About Kevin.” der ve bir anda arkasından Ezra Miller çıkar. Bana el sallayarak,

E.M:” Hi.” der.

A: “Hi anan.” derim ben de istemsiz bir şekilde. Ezra’yla tokalaşıp yeni film projelerinden bahsetmeye başlarız. Jim arkamızdan gelir ve konuşmamızı böler.

J.M:”So assistant, what about we have some private time?” der kendisiyle beni göstererek.

A: “What?” Ezra bize bakıp biraz gücenir. Yazıktır çocuğa, sen bu Jim’e bakma.

A: “Why?” derim sonra da.

J.M: “Cause we need to talk about-”

E.M: “Kevin!” der gülerek. Ah be Ezra’cım, komik değilsin.

J.M: “No you jackass!”

A: “About what?”

Jim yanıma yaklaşır ve kulağıma o iki kelimeyi fısıldar.

J.M: “ Sherlock Holmes.” Sonra anlarım ki bu adam ciddidir.

A: “Are you serious?”

E.M: “Oh, what is it you’re talking?”

A + J.M:” None of your business.” dedikten sonra birbirimize bakıp güleriz. İçimizdeki tüm pis enerjiyi atacak kişiyi sonunda bulmuş olmanın mutluluğuyla yolumuza devam ederiz. Jim beni kolumdan tutar ve bir banka oturtur. Bir anda içini dökmeye ve bunca zaman nasıl Sherlock’la flörtleştiklerinden bahseder. Sherlock için Kraliçe’nin tahtına oturup tacını kafasına yerleştirmesinden ve sonra da onu ‘You should see me in a crown.’ kelimesiyle nasıl tahrik ettiğinden bahseder. Öte yandan John’dan dinlediğim kadarıyla bunlar tam tersi şekilde daha çok terör yaratması için planlanmış hareketlerdir. Fakat Jim’i dinleyince ikna olmadım da değil.

Jim bir süre sonra ceketinin iç cebinden bir şey çıkarır ve der ki,

J.M: “I bought this to look good to him.” der ve gözlüğünü gösterir ve gözlüğü takar bu havada.

J.M: “I think I’m in love with him assistant.” der ve bükülür, içine çekilir ve utanır hatta bu dediğinden.

Ben de onu teselli etmek istercesine,

A: “No, no that’s totally normal. Everyone finds him charming.” Jim o sırada bana bakar ve gözlüğünü çıkarır.

J.M: “What the fuck do you mean? Do you also love him?” der tehditkar bir biçimde.

A: “No you got me wrong! I mean everyone around me really likes him and to be honest his looks are-”

J.M: “I don’t want to hear anymore! I cannot deal with another Woman.”

A: “That’s very rude.” derim ciddi anlamda kırılmış bir şekilde.

J.M: “If you knew what I meant you wouldn’t be saying that you peasant!” der ve yere tükürüp banktan kalkar. Ben orada kalakalırım ve Jim gözden uzaklaşınca yanıma Ezra gelir.

A: “Bi’ sen eksiktin aq problemlisi.” derim kısık sesle.

E.M: “Hello again. We didn’t meet properly. I’m-”

A: “Ezra Miller. We all know.”

E.M: “So what’s your name?”

Arkadaşlar şunu bir açıklığa kavuşturalım, ben adımı falan söylemek istemiyorum çünkü adım yok. Kim böyle bir iddia attıysa ortaya vatan ha-”

J: “We need your help assistant.” diye hemen araya girer John Watson abim koşarak ve yalpalayarak. Ağzı içkiden keçi götüne dönmüş bir şekilde konuşur.

A: “What happened?”

J: “Sherlock is terribly drunk and he tells me I’m drunk but I know he is the drunk.”

A: “So you aren’t?”

J: “I meeeaan, I may have had a few shots and-”

A: “I saw you were having your fourth shot when I came. Then you drank with us and I’m sure you drank Sherlock’s beer too.”

J: “Well in a small amount of time, you got me very straight. Like an arrow.”

A: “What?”

J: “I mean just come inside and help me carry him.”

Ezra’yı unuttuk sanmayın bu arada.

J: “Who’s that smelling your hair?” der John Ezra’yı göstererek.

A: “What?” derim ve dehşet içinde çekilip Ezra’ya bakarım.

A: “Did you just smell my hair?”

E.M: “I didn’t mean to but it was so- it was... It smelled clean. Which I’ve never been able to.”

A: “Oh, yes I heard you didn’t wash but is it true? Really?”

E.M: “I meeaan, someone needs to save the world right?”

A+J: “And you thought it’s you?”

E.M: “Why not? Is there a problem with it?”

A: “I meeeaan, yes there is but we’re not going to talk about it in this chapter Ezra. Maybe eleventh or twelth, which one you’d prefer?”

E.M: “I like the sound of a good old twelve.”

A: “Okay then, if you excuse us.” der ve olmayan şapkamı çıkarıp eğilip ekürim alkolik John Watson’la bara geri döneriz.

J: “By the way, Sherlock wants to go to Jim’a apartment so I need your help with that.”

A: “You tell this now?”

J: “Don’t judge me.” der ve birlikte güle oynaya Sherlock, Jim, Yıldız Tilbe ve Elva’nın olduğu masaya gideriz.

J: “So guys, I brought the man!” Ne diyor bu adam gerçekten anlamı-

S: “You meant woman?” der Sherlock. Gerçekten Sherlock John’dan daha ayıktır neden abartıyorsun John? Sherlock Jim’le aşna fişna yapacak diye paçan tutuştu demi? Neyse bakalım durumlar nedir ona göre çıkma izni veririm Sherlock’a.

J.M: “Hello dickhead.” diyerek selamlar beni Jim’ciğim sağolsun aile terbiyesinden asla ödün vermez. Bense Sherlock’a dönüp ne içtiğini sorarım. Small talk’tan deep issue’lara geçeceğizdir diye umarım.

A: “What are you drinking?”

J.M: “None of your business.”

A: “I just asked him what he’s having maybe I’ll order that too.”

S: “He’s right, it’s none of your business.” der Sherlock da. Ben John’a bakıp sinirlerimi tutmaya çalışırım ama John elini omzuma koyup,

J: “We are all having none of your business tonight.” der ve bardan kokteyli alıp diğerlerininkiyle tokuşturur.

J.M: “The name of the cocktail is ‘none of your business’ you peasant bitch!”

S: “Hey, Jim please don’t be harsh on her.”

A: “Thanks mister Holmes but I think I can defend myself-”

S: “I didn’t mean to be nice or save you from this man, I just said what is obvious and don’t forget that when we head home I’ll make you cry like a baby and make you return to your home!”

A: “Oha be. Gel bir de ağzıma sıç istersen. Ben işi bıraksam mı n’apsam tam bu noktada?”

E: “Aşkım lütfen kendine gel ve sinirlerine hakim ol. Sen onlardan daha güçlüsün ve bu kadar bölüm boyunca bu saçmalıkları yazıp bunlara katlandın. Derin bir nefes alıyoruz, dört saniye boyunca. Sonra üç saniye tutuyoruz, beş saniyede de üflüyoruz. Hep birlikte. All together children!” der ve ellerini kaldırıp hepimize nefes egzersizi yaptırmaya başlar. Bu işin sonu nereye gidecek diye merak ediyorum ama çok da umrumda değil gibi sonuçta kafama ne gelirse yazıyorum.

E: “So everyone is okay? Are we more calm?”

J: “I feel dizzy.”

S: “It’s like weed.”

J.M: “I have coke in my house in case you’re interested Sherlock.”

S: “Oh shut up. I know it’s powdered sugar Jim.”

J.M: “Still, the same effect if you shove it in your nose.”

S: “Well thanks but I have prescription for that.” der ve John’u gösterir. Jim’in suratı binbir parça olur ve kokteylini kafasına dikip hızla kalkar. Son kez arkasına döner ve Sherlock’a seslenir.

J.M: “You’ll regret this eşkiya.” Elva’yı yanımda bir gülme krizi tutar.

A: “Niye gülüyon?”

E: “Hep bunu yapmak istemişti de ondan gülüyorum. Çok tatlı ya gidip yanaklarını sıkacağım.” der ve Jim’in arkasından gidip yanaklarını sıkmaya çalışır yürürken. Jim de,

J.M: “Yapme yeağ...” gibi sesler çıkararak uzaklaşır bardan. O sırada Sherlock sinir bozucu bir şekilde bana bakar.

S: “Do you enjoy what you have done?”

A: “What have I done?” derim ve yumruklarımı hazırlarım. Belli ki birileri dayak istiyordur.

S: “I mean, you could’ve told me about your feelings. I would be less hard on you then.”

A: “What?”

J: “Assistant, even though we don’t know your name, I would allow you to feel that way to Sherlock.”

A: “What are you talking about?”

J: “We understand that he’s irresistible and-”

S: “You are not on my league.”

A: “What? I still can’t get what you’re talking about.”

S: “Don’t play the dumb even if we know that you are, BUT just admit it. You love me.”

A: “What?”

S: “I meeean, it’s hard to not love me but-”

A: “I agree with Greg, you are blind and stupid.”

S: “What? George said that I’m stupid? I am?”

A: “He didn’t, I added that. He just said that you are blind.”

J: “I agree on that Sherlock. You may be so bloody blind sometimes.”

S: “Oh! So you all decided to criticize me! Well I’m out and had enough of your bullshit. Especially you John!” der ve bardan çıkar.

Y.T: “Ben bir arkasından gideyim yalnız hissetmesin çocuk.”

A: “A bi de emzir be Yıldız abla.”

Y.T: “Ay kız yok. O ileride çocuğumuz olunca.” dedikten sonra masadaki shotlardan ikisini alıp dışarı çıkar.

A: “Yine biz bize kaldık iyi mi?”

J: “What?”

A: “Here we are again.”

J: “WE HAVE BEEN HERE BEFORE?”

A: “Why are you yelling?”

J: “I mean, I felt like I know this place but-”

A: “We’ve never been here, or just I have never been doc. So if you’ll excuse me I’ll have a beer.”

J: “Oh no, I’ll buy. Since you have a heartbreak, let me do this at least.”

Şimdi amcacım heartbreak’im yok ama beleş içkiye de hayır demem.

A: “Okay.” der ve amcamı bara yollarım. Elinde iki yarımlık birayla gelir ve oturur.

J: “So tell me, what’s your story?”

E bu biraz geç bir soru olmadı mı? Keşke beni işe almadan önce sorsaydın John’cuğum.

A: “Suddenly you are sober, aren’t you doc?”

J: “Well, I meeean-”

A: “Please don’t mean anything. Just admit that you played us.”

J: “I mean- But I really mean, yes I did. But for the sake of Sherlock.”

A: “And your love life with him. Now he’s with Yıldız.”

J: “She’s harmless. Also no equal to me.”

A: “Or Jim.”

J: “Are you trying to make me mad?”

A: “No. Just telling the truth.” der ve gülerek biramı içerim. Az mı çektim ben, biraz da siz çekin anacım.

#sherlock holmes #sherlock #john watson #Jim Moriarty #james moriarty #yıldız tilbe #elva #fanfiction #benedict cumberbatch #martin freeman #andrew scott #lit literature #Sherlock fandom #sherlock fanart #sherlock fanfic #ezra miller

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whimsically-ominously-auspice · 5 years ago

Text

This is the last human mimic alien we have to fight.

He's realized he's lost because you people aren't running wild having orgies and you're listening to the DNA4U

And further more You all don't want to share.

When i posted the video of Miss Shawntae telling snoop it was time to snoop her body up... And then Snoop went all seductive to the camera...

122895x1000= men that said "Nigga ima beat your ass you know my wo/man gonna see that. You ain't need to be showing yourself!".

76584284×1000= said "ew i hope i don't have my any asking me to do anything tonight after what i just seen. My imagination gonna kill myself! And i know that's just wrong wrong wrong!"

Now multiply the digits together before the multiplication sign and that is approximately minus 1000 That supported Snoops message.

I did all 3. I had to advert my eyes even. Although he couldn't even see me.

Now Snoop and i know each other over 8000zillion years. So i can easily put myself in his shoes.

So he would walk in and I be having sex and he just sit down and start having a conversation. Like we having BBQ ribs and not sexual intercourse.

His wife tho .... He would make sure "the white boy was covered" and tease her don't look. She look at the carpet... Eventually it kept going on so i took a picture off the wall and put it on the floor where she always sat.

She said "why you do that?"

"I realize the kids keep jumping on the bed and knock it off. Snoop stare at you If you move your face. And unless you're on LSD it's no fun staring at the carpet. So i gave it to you where it seems you always be looking although i had to take a pretty healthy guess. I just felt you was having the most miserable time of all and as my friend it was my honor to trip out and give you a gift"

She used the reflection to put on her makeup and slept in bed later.,Snoop quit being so paranoid. Cause she would face the wall and lean against him.

Point is... Snoop be all like he was watching sports to make sure we got the score.

I mean. Man. Earth. We tried everything we could to stop these aliens from wanting to habe orgies. Even,took,away,their dicks!!!

We did everything. Planet.

Y'all locked up with your soulmates made little difference on this kick of his.

I been doing it. I been riding like I been going around the world 500 times. I love sex.

82% of y'all all around the Earth been having sex.

4% have watched porno

18% have had 1 wild orgies of those 18% -- 32% had s second one. Of those 0.00004981% have gone onto a third.

Of those having 2 or more orgies 92% were aliens

Leaving 8% Of 18% of the entire world interested enough in watching or having sex with other people than their soulmate.

Who saved the world?

100% of humans.

You all get $5 and that includes children.

He's done all he could and he's failed. 100%

I think Edgar might be human... Looking at his alien structure in the film.

But he treated me like an alien. Im still a POW.

Alex had to sell a bed because he acted non human. And Alex worked hard on it to make it perfect for me.

I would been fine gloating from it. Fighting and being sassy to aliens.

But then someone claiming to care about me,most of all abandoned his son and law and daughter. And i hear stories of him being evil.

Some time ago they asked me "do you want a dad or mom?"

"No"

"We need to know because the future of the,Earth,depends on it. And the future of you. Now do you want a dad or,not?!"

"The question is will i remain needing a dad or father figure in the future. No i am fine. I have male role models to keep the species alive. Males. (Species not gender) I also have my mom in Mrs Harriet Tubmam. And if that fails then at that time i should be able to get the rest of me. But she's fine. I'm fine. I just got to remain stable. But adding a father or another mother i don't know just yet can remain disasterous."

Luckily Alex didn't burn the bed down. But it was,bugged and bombed by "Edgar", to me 'its just another one of those things we have to clean"

Do i care? Nothing. He doesn't affect me. I worry about Alex having to,deal with it. But,hes being,and,staying clean,and,then when he's,scared he stays by other cold turkey or non users. He was,around Crystal meth yesterday and he tasted 1/4 of a gram. Like when you would put your finger in the sugar jar. Then lick it. The other guy smoked 4.9876 ounces and blew it all in their faces including the babies. Thus Alex got 7.698 grams ingested via second hand smoke.

I didn't notice but we got in a fight with each other. Just like we always do.

Alex and i power punched him and his eye socket -- ocular bone -- was crushed like glass in 17 cracks.

His jaw I punched more alone but with Alex and total both sides he lost 9 teeth. And had to be wired shut after 72 stiches because i split his upper palate in two. I cracked his lower palate in 8072 places. So if you found a skull it would rest on powder of his lower jaw and then you'll find the upper. After decaying..

Then Alex on the top of his head had 49 stitches to repair his soft tissue from his frontal lobe when he crashed to the floor after the super punch to eye hit the coffee table.

He did get one "good" punch in -- his skull hit Alex right in the right eye.

It fucking hurt but it hurts in a good way. Its weird it's like "reward!" Pain. No suffering. Fucking got him good tho. We feel it every now and again. May be it is when he realises we will kill him for good. He keeps remembering that sudden silence of death.

He's currently on life support. "Medically induced coma" is our non panic code words. But it's basically life support but usually not full life support. It isn't 100% life support medical machines. Its 75% or less.

So technically it's life support and coma mixed. So we csll it medically induced coma. This way you understand if your family is the one on the machines -- it's only 25% body life.... However there's a 75% of recovery via healing machines.

The CIA. Willl decide when to pull the plug. Usually medically induced coma is someone evil or someone bad with the ability to be good. Usually aliens go straight to coma status.

If an alien will die it's 1st life support then coma. Your friend or family will die.

They said medically induced coma. But at this time. His brain is incapable of human thought so I am putting him on life support.

This makes it the family's wishes.

Most of the time "next of kin" is spouse then parents/siblings. Then children last.

Which is wrong. It should be the future. Thus Erica and Steven will ask the babies. And together they will decide.

Last night as a CIA operative while he was in a medically induced coma i was told by at least 1 child and 2 adults to pull. I reviewed. While they spoke from shock and relief their true feelings.

Knowing that the children escaped life with Eric once. I don't feel the right to allow Eric to live. I know the consequences of his actions caused two children to leave my planet in fear and terror and disgust because of Eric.

Erica was my 3rd pregnancy to abort and hold souls.

I hate Eric. That's why i punched him in the fucking face. I was happily surprised that Alex did it. Too in person.

Since the infants are involved and already resurrected. And had a nightmare of a time in less than 36 hours on Eaerth.

I allow them to be there to pull the plug, they can actually yank and pull the plug themselves.

So that is what i want and what the children need.

It will show Eric he doesn't belong here and has no,reason to,be at 25%

It makes life easier for all of us.

Eric was an outdoor kid. Like John and Jason and Greg. Etc. He never went into my school.

They didn't have to. And actually weren't ever enrolled. They liked the man work to learn to survive on their own.

While i taught the children the indoor stuff. The expansion of the mind.

I taught them the economy so the men working to increase their own economical structure could be helped to be taken in under their wings.

I left no one behind.

But he refused confirming.

1. Alcoholic system to drop other drugs. -- he uses crystal meth. Without cut backs. Without moderation

$5 if yoh remember and realized i said make smoothies without alcohol to share with your kids.

2. He blew it in their faces on purpose them injesting over 2.4 grams each.

Erica and Alex would cover their faces with thick blankets when the smoke came towards them.

It was quite a hostage situation. Knowing he could take the newborns and kill them in front of them.

Its happened to me 985 Point 2 times. I'm 35 years old.

875.8 times it's been with a knife.

Take the numbers and multiply by 10 million. For the last some kinda lots of 8 thousand zillion years.

It even happened to Alex. He he has the scars. From,this and last life., it,has happened.

So for me they're terrifying. Unless I'm there... I have saved 900 billion times 30 thousand. I those situations.

But i always remember the ones i lost.

So don't worry when I'm suicidal. Just leave me alone. Don't talk to me. I need silence.

So dead babies y'all.

Dead aliens.

It will be done

I seen that actually quite beautiful meme of April 2020 the clouds and UFO.

I don't get mad or violent because I'm stepped back to watch y'all cope.

But I say to y'all "fuck no that's not happening" I say to that UFO "Fucking try it you will all die" i just scroll on because I get so angry. I get so mad. Its a beautiful photo but i refused to repost it because it isn't something i support.

Most reposts of memes are supported unless i type something on the bottom. Saying it's not.

So my dad. I didn't care until i saw The Rock, "her dad is alive" all happy and in support.

Then i was bothered. Then I cared. Then i felt something about it. But until then i felt nothing.

I didn't feel shame..i felt that were all made of glass.

Because I was happy to have a dad.. One that seemed good. I was actually happy.

And it was kept personal to me... But then I saw the Rock felt it. Then I began to feel..

Broken. But Alex kept it together and started getting rid of the bed. Taking it down. Removing bombs. And fixing all that ass hole did "my dad"

I know the Rock.. He can handle. His dad just died. And we did a lot for him.

So for him to be elated. I get through the day thinking no one really cares what i feel and they don't pay kuch attention..but the Rock in that moment in time.

He was happy. And i knew then i had to Destroy a light of happiness inside him and he looked away from the camera to say "we are all happy. The while world"

DNA4U list one person as my father. He's my uncle..

Edgar claimed it was his 18th cousin.

You know, it doesn't matter.

Donate. Mr Lee Tubman. And more. They're my dads. They kept me safe. Taught me to be wiser and more caring about myself. Donte was 2 years younger than me. But he was a father figure. Guy was the fun dad. Fred Flintstone i called one friend's dad was the fishing buddy. We were not close but he was a silent father figure.

I stole all my friends dads. Borrowed them. Their moms, too.

I have 1800 moms that I call mom.

I know who my moms and dads are.

Just like Erica called me mom the other day and Brittany will too. And Alex my cousin's son. Candy. Brandy. Declan.

So i know i have a family that understands it doesn't matter how I got here. It matters who treated me well. Matthew McCognohey. Kid rocks. They're like my dad's and my kids. Uncles and Cousins.

Blood doesn't matter. Shit half the time Snoop is my God or dad or bother or husband or little kid i have to save. He's my friend.

Snoop is too much of everything. He is my co-nigger. My partner in many crimes against humanity (practical jokes)

I call him my Friend. But my family wouldn't be complete without him and Shawntae.

Harriet. I call her momma all the time. It feels natural. Sometimes i call her old lady.

So while i was joyful for a moment thinking I found someone that actually cared to find out he didn't.

I myself wasn't affected until i knew others would be

Its just a lesson in life. Don't trust people.

I told Alex abandon ship, fuck that place. Ain't no one can go in there!!

He understood and agreed then took the role "no,one is driving me and her from our home." He decided to defend the homestead. That is the role a man takes

Im all you gotta sweep the whole place,then,rest and do,it again,2 more times at least.,Then,again when,I,get there. If i get there.

But i feel good to know my lover isn't gonna let anyone drive him down. Just turn around. Learn a lesson. Clean the mess.

Why do i need a father when i have a man?

Clearly i am an independent woman and always have been.

But i need a family. Otherwise I have no point to live.

And that is why i am suicidal.

I don't see s point to live. Not when Alex and i fight and i don't want him to talk to me cause some alien got in our way once again.

He was double attacked by aliens.

So if their desire is for me to die... Then they should keep,doing it.

If,not they need to stay out of my way so i can,get my family,together again.,in,real life.

My family that I know is my family. Not aliens. Not fans. Not someone that needs to apologize to me or needs an explanation.

People that can think on their own and not be reminded they need to have love in their spirit.

Now Snoop sometimes plays the role of my brother. And we are competitive. It just makes us proud of each other and ourselves for surviving a challenge. I do it to him too but I play old hard skill. He plays old new remember when. I do ancient V-Ball and he does pop and country experience.

So his spirit is of an ego -- which salutes the fact we will grow.

Often we do the spirit of mischievous. To remind danger still exists but we will have fun and love in the end.

Friend. Someone that is gonna fry you but the end od what matters.

Sometimes we relax and chill. But them old cogwheels of the mind never quit rolling. Advance. Advance. Lets keep it going don't stop.

He's like me. Suicidal.

But he used to release his inner poison. Now he makes it not exist by doing something else ....

But me? Nothing helps but the mimic of death itself. Silence.

People are what causes it. Alien people.

So you humans. Keep on being you.

Its you that is gonna save the world

I gave you guidelines to help us out this mess.

Because I can't even see y'all because the aliens surrounding me trying to get my last breath.

Show me you. Save us. You're doing good

I got $5 on y'all that we make it.

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yeetacai · 3 years ago

Photo

Always annoyed me to see hot takes on how the gems were bad caretakers bc... They were never meant to raise a child??? Of course they're going to fuq it up. That was the main part of the humor. They're literally Advanced AI Light-Based Aliens.

We saw how the Diamond's didn't know what to do with Pink. And trying to teach her how to be a proper Diamond just frusterated them to no end.

We saw how Rose let baby Sour Cream do whatever he wanted... Because why shouldn't he? Her whole life, all she wanted was freedom. She doesn't know anything about human children.

Raising a child is already hard. You think aliens, who have no concept of what childhood is, are going to be the perfect role models and parents?

There's a reason why Greg raised Steven for the beginning of his childhood.

And I'm not even mad at Greg for letting Steven live with the gems full time. He has a whole song about he could never be ready to raise Steven. He's just doing his best. Steven is half alien/gem and his first (and only) child. He knows less of what Steven needs than any other parent on the planet. And even HE didn't have a proper upbringing.

Amethyst was the CLOSEST thing the gems got to experience as something that NEEDED to learn and grow. And she had her own trauma because of it.

This WHOLE cartoon is about friends, family, trauma, relationships, and healing. I'm very happy that they acknowledged the real affects of Steven's childhood in Future. Because I already knew this child would be chock-full of trauma. He became the ambassador between Earth and Homeworld, at a ripe young age of... 14/15?

Honestly, Steven's whole breakdown mirrors exactly what I experienced at 17, sans all the wacky adventures and gem stuff.

No one knew I was suffering, because I didn't let them know. I tried to tackle my depression by myself (doesn't work btw) and did my best to "fix" myself. I tried to keep up the appearance of the perfect child, all while falling apart mentally.

It's no ones fault, and everyone's fault at the same time. Everyone has trauma... And Steven Universe had the hard job of breaking the cycle of abuse. I had the hard job of breaking the cycle of abuse.

Rebecca Sugar created and fought for one of the most groundbreaking cartoon shows I've ever witnessed.

It's so dividing, because it IS good. No one wants to acknowledge that they have trauma. And this show touches on so many different types of trauma. Part of trauma, and why the cycle of abuse occurs, is that it's HARD to accept. It's HARD to work through. It's messy, and painful, and filled with making mistakes. It's filled with breaking old habits, and accepting that what you experienced wasn't right. It's accepting that you were hurt... and moreover, the person(s) who hurt you, were also hurt too. That doesn't give them an excuse, but how many people have we all ended up hurting because of our own trauma? Those who don't acknowledge their trauma hurt people without even realizing it. And that's all of us. Because none of us are perfect. And all of us have our own baggage.

The silver lining in it all? It's worth the hardships. We get to see how much happier the gems are in Future. We see the Diamonds working towards healing. And we know that Steven is on the road to recovery too.

The whole message of Steven Universe, is being able to change. You CAN make it better. And you CAN make it right.

You deserve to live your best life. You deserve not only to survive, but to also thrive.

they’re always leaving me behind and i guess i wanted to do it to them, too.

funny how the child doesn’t trust the adults to be able to handle his problems when he’s been fixing theirs for his entire childhood. doesn’t stop me from hoping tho.

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louisandmenfest · 2 years ago

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M A S T E R P O S T - Louis & Men Fest

AO3: Louis & Men Fest

A Fist Full of Glitter by @reminiscingintherain [M, 3k, Louis/Nick Grimshaw]

Nick G: Fancy going to the BRITs tonight? Got a ticket with your name on. Louis: Is there any universe in which I’d say no to this? I think not.Nick G: I’ll pick you up at 6:30pm. Suit’s being messengered over now. Louis: You spoil me. <3 xx

Or:

Louis' a Sugar Baby, Nick's his proper and formal Sugar Daddy. What could possibly happen to make that change?

There's A World There For The Taking by gayumbrella [E, 9k, Louis/Liam Gallagher]

There’s a dark figure stood at the end of the corridor, the light shining out from beneath the door behind it eerily lighting up the silhouette. If Louis hadn’t still been caught up in the last two lines of the chorus he’d just written before he’d run off to the loo he might’ve recognized that weird wide-footed stance. He’s seen enough videos, seen enough pictures to be able to tell the person to the posture. But he’s not really looking, eyes skipping over invisible lyrics while he walks through the half-dark corridor.

He’s about to go around the corner back to his studio with a mumbled “hello mate” and a glance out of the corner of his eye, when the figure moves and pushes the door behind them open with their back. More light flows into the now no longer dark air and the figure becomes a person.

Louis stops dead in his tracks. Whips his head around, stares and for a blood-stopping second contemplates just walking on like it isn’t Liam fucking Gallagher stood in the doorway.

Louis and Liam Gallagher at the same studio.

Something That Resembles Happiness Enough by smileformemylovely [E, 7k, Louis/Zayn]

They were on the edge of being happy. They were happy enough.

Zayn and Louis have been best friends since they were children. No matter the country, no matter the coast, they were always LouisAndZayn.

Maybe, just maybe, they could've been more.

I'm Ready for the Worst by @lululawrence [NR, 26k, Louis/Greg James]

From the moment Greg had met the One Direction lads, he’d known they had something special. They were charismatic, incredibly talented, and self-deprecating in the most endearing way.

But Louis. Louis was more.

Greg had never been able to put a finger on what it was exactly, but he’d been enthralled and hooked from the first moment he’d seen his bright smile and flamboyant mannerisms. Not that it mattered, what with Louis immediately falling into Grimmy’s orbit.

Through it all, his dirty little crush he could never, ever admit to was on the secretly gay boybander that was also the boyfriend and eventual ex of one of his closest friends. It was fine. It was nothing. It would never be anything.

Until, one spring night in 2018, it suddenly was.

My Home Is Your Body by edensrose / @holdingthornsandroses [E, 15k, Louis/Henry Cavill]

He had seen who had made his senses go haywire. His ex was in the front row, five feet in front of him. He felt his eyes on him even as he mechanically made his way to the end of the runway, hoping to God he didn’t look like a maniac. Everything was a blur. He somehow managed to walk the rest of the way without falling or emoting anything. Why was he HERE? Of all places.

...where Louis is a successful omega model and the last thing he expects is his ex to become the co-partner of the new company he works for....

Souls A'Fire by louisbarnes / @tomlinsonbarns [NR, 55k, Louis/Bucky Barnes]

Louis Tomlinson just wants to find his family.

Bucky Barnes just wants a life worth living.

A Lucky Apocalypse AU

Don't Want You Like A Best Friend by orphan_account [T, 5k, Louis/Luke Malak]

Louis and Luke hang out a lot, and it doesn't mean anything.

Until it does.

Interview with the vampire by @allwaswell16 [E, 4k, Louis/Rob Pattinson]

Working at an alpha magazine wasn't always easy for an omega like Louis, but he's just landed his biggest interview yet with an A list actor who has asked for Louis especially. Unfortunately, the interview is with Rob Pattinson, the biggest pain in the arse alpha on the planet.

Inspired by Rob’s interview in GQ Magazine and not actually about vampires

#louisandmenfest #masterpost #i saved the url just because i didn't want it to be taken and used for something else #and i wanted to just get all this archived since obviously the original blog was deleted #i talked to the original creator of the fest about running it again #but decided to call it louis rare pair fest #so come talk to me there!

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fuckblizzardbearlover · 6 years ago

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Pink Diamond And Why You are Objectively Wrong

Why anti pink diamond naysayers are wrong under the cut

The problem is that all the negative propaganda i’ve seen about Rose (yall should stop Dead-naming her probably) is that its all based on nothing.

Evidence doesnt matter only wild speculation? You want a character to be bad so thats all you see

the apparent philosophy is that Rose should have used her authority to try to stop the colonization. The problem is that there was no evidence she didnt. People spent WEEKS talking about it. We dont know jack squat about homeworld other than what the Crystal Gems have told Steven, what we saw in the Trial and what we’ve heard Peridot say. There was no reason after we found that out to think that “Pink Diamond” DIDNT do everything she could. People made the Assumption and went about that.

Expecting a single person to completely overthrow society is nuts but not as nuts as assuming people are bad until proven otherwise

Yet after learning she did some people still arent satisfied. Saying that she should have openly rebelled....Despite NO evidence that could ever work.

See we dont know anything really about gem society, we dont know how diamond Authority works, how the armies are structured, how Big the empire is. We dont KNOW. But instead of deciding to give the benefit of the doubt, they are deciding to assume the worst. Thats a choice and a baseless one at that.

Thats just...not how people work. Most people are good. even people supporting horrible things can be good, and their problem is that they’ve been misled by misinformation, by propoganda, were raised wrong.

You give people the benefit of the doubt, and only stop when they have PROVEN to not show any progress and no intention of ever trying to change.

The problem is we DO know some things.

Its safe to assume that in a kids show that good people are good even if they make mistakes even bad ones

We know that Rebecca Sugar is allegedly a good person, as are the developers of the show. We know that its a cartoon show meant for kids, and so its suppose to have a positive message.

So in the light of a lack of information one would assume that since Rose is a GOOD character that she tried everything she could think of.

Just ask Princess Leia why a single woman cant save the galaxy

And we DO have info on why an open rebellion wouldnt work. We DO know that their empire is galactic, that hundreds of worlds of gems are out there, that its pretty easy for even a fusion like Alexandrite to be outclassed by a mere two gems, that they have weapons to destabalize the forms of gems. We DO know they have instantaneous transportation (Galactic Warps). We have every reason and mountains of evidence that a full galactic war with Earth would have been won easily by homeworld.

We DO know that any gem seen as ‘unfit’ whether they came out wrong or not doing their job has a high chance of being shattered and harvested (i’.e. broken, and their life sucked out killing them. because remember shattering isnt killing its shattering. HARVESTING would kill a gem).

With these two important pieces of information we can make the SAFE assumption with no wild mass guessing that any Open war with homeworld that resulted in the full brunt of Homeworlds military power would have easily overpowered the gems. That the colonization which based on We’re all falling apart, happens with minimal interaction from a Diamond, would have continued, all life including the ancestors of the current 8 billion humans would have been killed. And every gem on the planet, whether a loyalist, P.D.’s army or Crystal gem would have been murdered and their bodies used to fuel Loyal gems.

“but Pink Diamond could have fought till the end, used her army...”

Could she? where is the evidence. She wanted to stop the gem way of life, stop the colony and the other Diamonds just thought she was being lazy. She didnt want to kill human cities and the Diamonds thought she was just lazy. Gems like Peridot or Agate’s dont even doubt their way of life and understand what any other is. they are sheltered to the point they dont know what weather is. If P.D. gave the order to stop colonization would her armies just laugh at her saying “oh those Diamonds are so funny!”? We know from that same episode that Diamonds dont even interact with the troops, she was expected to not even step foot on earth. allegedly spending the last thousand years stuck on the moon base giving commands through a computer. So we can assume that colonization is fairly automated with gems knowing what their general purpose is, obeying the next higher up with Diamonds being mostly a figure head answering questions that confuse their underlings like “do we go ahead and murder all these people?” or what structures to build.

If open war did start and she actually fought homeworld from earth....does she even have any space ships? she had 1 kindergarden worth of Amethysts vs the entire homeworlds. is 100,000 to 1 good odds?

“well maybe the entirety of the Army wouldnt be brought to bare”.

THERE ARE LITERALLY ONLY 4 PEOPLE IN THE GALAXY WHOS LIFE MATTERS AND 1 OF THEM REBELS AND YOU THINK THEY ARE GOING TO JUST LET HER?

A DIAMOND, the ONLY entity in homeworld whos life is valued? Openly rebelling against gem society? You dont think that would have got their attention? we saw from the other episodes that they see her as a stupid lazy child whos SUPPOSE to be a galactic commander. They didnt listen to her because they thought she needed to learn how to completely obliterate a planet on her own like a Diamond is suppose to. They’ve repeatedly shown that not only do they not value organic life they dont value any life but a diamonds. The concept of destroying their way of life to protect some easily harvested gems and easily squished bloody pulps of humanoids would be seen as some weird crazy idiot thing the Kid Diamond was doing. From the Evidence of the well documented lack of care for life we know homeworld has, and the Evidence of how the Diamonds view P.D. we can extrapolate that they might do something like Either blow up Earth and “start over” but maybe with supervision, or just automate the construction and “ground’ P.D. while she got reeducated and given another colony in a few thousand years..

BUT DESPITE ALL THIS EVIDENCE WE STILL DONT KNOW BECAUSE WE BARELY KNOW JACK SQUAT ABOUT GEM SOCIETY

so we dont know For sure if all this evidence points to the proper conclusion. My point is that we Dont know what could have happened and what options they had, but we DO know the tone of the show, intent of the author so its safe to say even if Rose didnt magically know the perfect way to rebel that she tried everything she could think of. saying she should have done this or done that is like saying “X war would have ended sooner if the allies had just magically known that these bases up here were working off a skeleton crew and a blitzkrieg would have easily broken through to the capital”

So yes if We Dont know the Details, but you Still Assume the Worst, then Its Your Own Fault and has nothing to do with the story. I saw someone post about how we got a non reaction from Greg...but...why would we? Rose was a hero, it doesnt matter to him if in some war that took place a thousand year before his greatgreatgreatgreatgreatgreatgreatgreatgreat grandparents were born the rebel leader USED to be one of the homeworld leaders.

the reason this person was mad was because they extrapolated despite no evidence that P.D. did something wrong, because Allegedly (based on no evidence) she could have rebelled in a better way (using “Baby’s First Rebellion handbook, no doubt”). OF COURSE GREG DIDNT HAVE A PROBLEM WITH IT, he already knew she fought a war to save earth and she won and Earth is saved. The outrage over this is artificial, fake and has no basis in fact!

So yes like i said twice already we dont have all the details and its wrong to assume the worst....

EXCEPT

We do have SOME Details, and not the ones i just listed. We have evidence that what Rose did was good because of what happened.

We DONT know if more gems could be saved, we DONT know if the war could have been ended early, we DONT know whether or not open war would have worked.

But we DO know She wanted to scare the gems off first, she wanted to save earth without a SINGLE person getting hurt, not one human, not one gem. Yes its apparently traumatic to get Poofed otherwise Saphire wouldnt have refered to it as a sacrifice, however we know its ultimately Harmless. Obviously Roses plan was to make the Colony not worth it. But because the Diamonds are shitty people and thought Pink was just being lazy it didnt work and so things had to escalate

We ALSO know that Blue Diamond arrived to oversee the end of the rebellion. Seeing as Pink wasnt even allowed to go onto her own planet it seems safe to assume troop deployment was based on Blues command, so peoples conspiracy that Pink sent out her own troops to fight the crystal gems is baseless with evidence against.

There isnt enough information to know whether P.D.’s plan was a sound one but we KNOW that P.D. was the closest to the other diamonds, if they didnt show enough love to Pink to convince her she mattered it was the Diamonds Fault not Pinks, for not picking up love where none existed. And we can assume based on her characterization that if she knew that the Diamonds would retaliate with evil in their hearts, rather than just leave out of disappointment, she WOULDNT have done that. Again blame the person who fires the bullet, not the person who denied the gunman’s feelings. stop blaming the victim.

And we DO know that Earth was saved. As i said i think there is a high possiblity Earth would be obliterated if Pink rebelled. Essentially the child doesnt want to shoot their dog, so the parents do it for them. But we DONT know. But we DO know that Rose’s decision lead to saving literally billions of lives.

And we DO know that not a single gem life was lost. yes its tragic that many gems were corrupted, but we know based on centipeedle they can be made to be happy and are in peace in their bubbles till they can be cured, And despite thousands of years of torture, the gem shards are now at piece, and may be able to live a fulfilling life in the future as a fusion. We know based on all evidence that a broken gem is still alive, just disoriented from having its body not attatched. So the only lives lost were whatever humans fought for their freedom, and a few thousand gems were critically injured. I’d say a few thousand casualties is a small price to pay in any war.

We DO know that the Crystal Gems legitimately thought they were safe on earth, thought all dead, As we learned in “alternate ending” that Rose didnt even WANT steven she just wanted to have a child and have them grow up. No magical gem destiny. We DO know that Earth is safe and in good hands. And there is a possibility that even all the gems who were shattered may one day be happy again.

We DONT know what could have happened if Pink openly rebelled. But the only way to be ‘better” is things lead to a few more crystal gems being unshattered. but it also might have meant millions dead.

We DO know that her decision worked out for the best. Stevens happy, Gregs, happy, Pearl is happy, Garnet is happy, Peridot is Happy, offcolors can migrate to earth, corrupted gems can achieve happyness despite their disability, and shattered gems can find piece

So Stop going out of your way to ruin this for yourselves and being angry

#su spoilers #steven universe spoilers #steven universe #pink diamond #rose quartz #pearl #garnet #rebecca sugar #crewniverse #discourse #negativity #su critical #anti negativity #anti edgelord

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deadcactuswalking · 5 years ago

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REVIEWING THE CHARTS 2020: 17/01

I don’t really have an intro for this one so: REVIEWING THE CHARTS 2020. Let’s get into it.

Top 10

At number-one, for the third week in a row, is “Own It” by Stormzy featuring Burna Boy and Ed Sheeran, and honestly I don’t really see a foreseeable threat to this song’s throne, but much like all songs in January, it’s a pretty weak stance and could easily fall to an unexpected climber.

Lewis Capaldi’s “Before You Go” is once again stalling at the runner-up spot.

At number-three, we have a surprise debut from an artist I didn’t think would ever peak this high in the UK, Future, who has partnered with Drake for “Life is Good”, a collaboration that is clenching the top spots on a bunch of charts, I’d imagine, mostly because of Drake. God knows how many top 10 or top 40 singles he has at this point, I’m not going to even bother counting them. Future, on the other hand, has had his highest ever charting song on the UK Singles Chart this week, and his third UK Top 40 single (His first hit in the top 10 ever). Congratulations, I suppose, but we’ll talk about the song a bit later.

Due to the sudden debut, most of the top 10 is falling this week. First of all, “Don’t Start Now” by Dua Lipa is down a spot to number-four.

“The Box” by Roddy Ricch seems to immediately abolish that trend as it has rocketed up 11 spaces in the chart to number-five, perhaps highlighting a possible #1 candidate in the coming weeks. It’s Roddy’s first top 10 hit in the UK.

“ROXANNE” by Arizona Zervas is down two spaces to number-six.

Lewis Capaldi’s “Someone You Loved” is stable at number-seven for some God forsaken reason.

The Weeknd’s “Blinding Lights” is up two spots to number-eight and with the video release, I could see this peaking even higher.

Justin Bieber’s “Yummy” falls hard off of the debut, being nearly pushed out of the top 10, losing four spaces to number-nine.

Finally, “Dance Monkey” by Tones and I is down four spots to #10. Sure.

Climbers

We have a rare week where there are no notable climbers at all outside of the top 10, which is emblematic of a certain period on the chart.

Fallers

In January, popular music repeats itself and the chart regurgitates the biggest hits of the year for a brief month where nothing can seemingly actually make a spin for the top spot or become a smash hit, and everything somehow collapses, and every debut goes nowhere, only to be gone by March. It should be the month where the smash hit songs appear on the charts for the first time, and it usually is, but it definitely never seems like that, as the chart is so dry and after the influx of 2019’s greatest hits, we seem to have reached a new equilibrium, so we can start waving goodbye to our fallers and drop-outs; I doubt we’ll see many of them again. “Ride It” by Regard featuring Jay Sean is down six spots to #16, “South of the Border” by Ed Sheeran featuring Camila Cabello and Cardi B is down seven spaces to #24, as is “Gangsta” by Darkoo and One Acen at #26, “HIGHEST IN THE ROOM” by Travis Scott and remixed by ROSALIA and Lil Baby is down five to #30, “Senorita” by Shawn Mendes and Camila Cabello is down five to #35, and finally, “Lights Up” by Harry Styles is down eight positions to #40.

Dropouts & Returning Entries

There aren’t any returning entries, after all, we seldom have too many re-entries to the chart, but there is a handful of dropouts from the chart. First of all, we have the three-songs-per-artist rule coming into effect for the first notable time in a while, as since there’s a new Stormzy song, “Audacity” featuring Headie One is out from #26 and I’m going to predict it’s definitely back next week. Also out is the promising new arrival “Savage” by MIST out off of the debut at #35, non-starter, “Into the Unknown” by Idina Menzel and AURORA from the Frozen II soundtrack, out from #37, and “Heartless” by the Weeknd, out from #38.

Before we get into the new arrivals, here are some songs in the top 75 that have a trajectory seemingly aiming for the top 40, that I’d like to see get there. Not all of these songs are good but they are all healthy predictions. We have “Good News” by the late Mac Miller at #49, “Power Over Me” by Dermot Kennedy at #60, “Say So” by Doja Cat at #65, “SUGAR” by BROCKHAMPTON at #66, “Eleven” by Khalid at #70, and “Roses” by Saint Jhn at #72. I’d bet money on most of these eventually making the top 40. Anyway, here’s the main attraction:

NEW ARRIVALS

#37 – “You should be sad” – Halsey

Produced by Greg Kurstin

It should be no surprise that I’m not the biggest fan of Halsey. Part of her alternative-pop-girl image was really pretentious and turned me off initially but once she fully embraced she was a pop singer, whilst I respect her more, I still found her lacking, arguably more so, as a singer and songwriter. This song, however, is pretty unique, and it comes from her album Manic, which I’ve yet to listen to. It’s a country song, funnily enough right next to the only other country song that made a big splash in the UK last year, “Old Town Road” by Lil Nas X featuring Billy Ray Cyrus, which is at #36. It’s not a common occurrence for country songs to appear on the UK Singles Chart, for obvious reasons, but I’ll take a Shania Twain-influenced country pop song dependent on more neo-traditional 90s pedal-steel—Listen, I know little to nothing about country, and I’m throwing all these random key terms around... I’m not necessarily the best person to speak on this, and I know that, but I guess I’ll see if I myself prefer Halsey’s ninth UK top 40 hit. For what it’s worth, the guitar line here is really sweet, but Halsey’s voice with an additional country twang and drowned in reverb, just sounds kind of gross and ugly? I guess that’s the best way to say it, and even though sometimes it works, she seems way too downbeat and subtle for a vengeful kiss-off... until the entire flow of the verse obstructs for the chorus, which is introduced by a really dodgy, awkward wave of distorted strings that just sound awful. Whatever tone, genre, style or mood this song attempts to build up is immediately broken by that, and whilst some of these lyrics are really specific and genuinely pretty good, I’m tuned out until that killer electric guitar riff comes in and steals the show... before it just goes again. It’s not like there’s build-up to the riff either, or that it’s a break from the momentum because everything just keeps happening in the background. It’s not a drop because there’s no climax or catharsis to it, it’s just a cool riff that’s... there. Yeah, this is wasted potential, and that’s not even including the questionable at best mixing and whatever the hell that bridge is. This song might actually be broken, like what happened in the mediating process, guys? Who leant on seven wrong buttons at the same time? God, what a hot mess of a song.

#28 – “Rare” – Selena Gomez

Produced by Sir Nolan and Simon Says

Selena Gomez has a new album. It’s where “Lose You to Love Me” comes from. It’s probably pretty mediocre. I do not care for Selena Gomez. She makes robot pop music. It is about as standard and droning as these sentences. This is her 16th solo UK top 40 hit, or without “the Scene” if you prefer—that clause alone gives me more character than a Selena Gomez album. Sometimes with good songwriters, she can get something decent out of her limited range and bland production, and with Madison Love as a songwriter and Charli XCX involved as the person originally handed the song, I actually have somewhat high expectations for this, and you know what? It’s promising. The lo-fi bass groove and steady funk/soul groove in the intro is pretty sweet, but then the whole 2019 pop schtick comes in, and some of the soul is lost, but it has a pretty quirky, fun string instrumental with nice, bubbly synths and seemingly randomly-placed hi-hats. Here, Gomez actually works pretty well as she stays calm until the chorus, and she doesn’t sound too bad there, even if she’s desperately filling up the meter with nonsense, because it does sound like a child’s nursery rhyme. Hence, she fits in perfectly with the petty lyrics and cute instrumental. The guitar in the post-chorus/bridge sounds really great too. Perhaps it is over-long though, as three minutes and 40 seconds does make the chorus wear off, although it really could not have been as good as a song without that bridge, as the slow sense of dread is keeping up in the pre-chorus, with that intense bass groove and what seem to be airplane crash sound effects, only to propel itself back into a really cute chorus, with kind of an 80s sound I’m just noticing. Yeah, this is pretty good, and it has Charli XCX kind of written all over it. I’d like to hear a remix if that’s fine with you, Selena. You’ve impressed me with this one.

#21 – “STILL DISAPPOINTED” – Stormzy

Produced by Mikey J

This is Stormzy’s 22nd UK Top 40 hit and Christ, there’s a lot to unpack with this one. Okay, so this is the 2019-2020 Grime War, or at least that’s what r/grime is calling it. There have been 32 rappers or MCs involved in the war so far, including Ed Sheeran, but most are just mentioned in diss tracks, or “dubs” as the grime scene calls them, without responding. Basically, JAY1, who has been on this show before, didn’t pay Dot Rotten for producing the song “Million Bucks”, which was credited to Steel Banglez (It’s actually a great beat, by the way, I’d want credit too), so Dot Rotten released three dubs, one of which was copyright-claimed by JAY1, thus in response Dot released another song called “Copyright Claim This, P***y”. Classy. Then two of the most desperate-for-attention people in the grime scene find themselves dissing each other: Dot Rotten and Wiley. Within four days, Dot Rotten releases eight dubs. There’s this whole mess with Wiley, Dot and Jaykae, but then finally, a fan asks if he will be dissing Jaykae. Wiley says, “Never, he’s with Ed and Stormzy now”. Hence, Wiley and Stormzy go back and forth for a while on Twitter, and the beef escalates, with Wiley posting a Stormzy dub called “Eeydiat Skengman”, which is just okay, but has a pretty killer beat. Stormzy responds with “DISAPPOINTED”, but the reception is lukewarm. Sure, the Brexit joke was funny, but he had mostly weak bars and he also called himself the King of Grime over a drill beat. In fact, might as well cover all the Wiley tracks: they all sound the same. The beef has mostly stopped for now, but it’s still going on in the lower echelon. I would argue it probably stopped because of Stormzy’s final dub, “STILL DISAPPOINTED”, which is hilarious, and actually on a grime beat, in fact it’s on an iconic beat from the first Lord of the Mics in 2004, “Mic Check 1-2” by Kano. It starts out pretty okay, Stormzy just saying that he’s a real G and all... but then:

So why you love to talk about mums so much?

The entire diss track is about Wiley’s mother, and that when Wiley’s house was threatened by bricks and guns during gang violence, he (supposedly) sent her to Cyprus instead of trying to rescue her and improving her quality of life. He then says that his mother is pregnant because Wiley is fraud (Huh?), that Stormzy will have sex with his mother, and that she is a whore, but it’s not her fault that she had to move to Cyprus, but he will still have sex with his mother and become the man of the house. He takes only a few bars to relax and stop going on this tangent detailing Wiley’s mother’s move to Cyprus, but then comes back to the topic again, and whilst some of the bars make seemingly no sense at least to me, the dub is cruel and so oddly specific that I’d be incredibly offended. I’d probably want to fight Stormzy after this, honestly, and the song isn’t even that great. It’s a diss track, so I can’t really critique it as a song and not a personal attack, but Stormzy’s flow and charisma is definitely there and this was a funny listen.

Also, this line had me cackling:

I never wanna hear you say, "Free the mandem" (Yeah) / Let's go Cyprus and go free your mumzy

#3 – “Life is Good” – Future and Drake

Produced by OZ and D. Hill

It is so weird to see Future here. Drake not so much obviously, but this song peaked at #2 in the US, nearly giving Future his first #1, all thanks to Drake. Without Drake, the song would still be entirely coherent but it wouldn’t chart at all. That’s because this is not a collaboration in any sense of the word. It wouldn’t even fit under the guise of their little collaborative effort, What a Time to be Alive. It’s a Drake song, and then a Future song. Hold on, let me change this.

#3 – “Life is Good” – Drake, then Future

Produced by OZ and D. Hill

I don’t mind guest artists having solo sections of songs, hell, Drake had one on Travis Scott’s “SICKO MODE” a year back, but there’s a beat switch in the middle that completely separates both performances. Drake has a chorus, as does Future. Drake has a verse, Future has two—under two completely separate beats. At least on “SICKO MODE”, Travis joined in with Drake and Tay Keith for a verse and a couple ad-libs under the same beat. Sigh, I guess it doesn’t matter in the end, even though Future cheated a chart placement; it’s not as obviously fraudulent as Ellie Goulding’s efforts, or John Legend’s. I’m surprised that a plain and simple trap-rap song charted this high in the first place, even if it was just Drake (And for most people who skip after the first two minutes, it might as well be). I don’t know why I’m complaining honestly, because the song is honestly pretty good. I would have usually dismissed this as dark trap-rap nonsense with no redeemable qualities, but this is one of those songs with such a lack of energy it’s almost eerie, and those creepy synths in Drake’s part are fantastic in making it sound like that. Repeating inflections from “Mob Ties” aside, Drake’s performance is pretty good, with a couple funny lines, although I’m not sure how intentionally funny they were.

Haven’t done my taxes, I’m too turnt up

[Gnarly dude]s caught me slippin’ once, okay, so what?

I think Pusha T’s diss track about you hiding a child was a bit more than being caught slipping once, Aubrey. Anyway, after a voice memo interlude from Future, we have a pretty great beat, with an admittedly stiff but still impressive trap groove, and while Future is less on beat than Drake and arguably less interesting, he rides the beat well enough, and the synths are really quiet, for whatever reason. Regardless, this is a pretty cool song with great flows from both rappers and an eerie, cool beat from OZ.

I’m trying to avoid nonsense, get Osama spray in this b****, woo!

HUH

Conclusion

This was actually a pretty great week, with the obvious Worst of the Week going to Halsey’s “You should be sad”, and a surprising Best of the Week for “Rare” by Selena Gomez. In fact, I’m going to give a tied Honourable Mention instead of any Dishonourable Mentions, so it’s going to Stormzy’s “STILL DISAPPOINTED” and Drake’s, then Future’s, “Life is Good”. Follow me on Twitter @cactusinthebank, I’ll see you next week.

REVIEWING THE CHARTS 2020

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stevenuniversallyreviews · 7 years ago

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Episode 64: Keystone Motel

“IT’S FUSION, SAPPHIRE!”

Keeping It Together suggests that despite Steven and the fans clamoring for more Ruby and Sapphire, their return would only come about in a calamity. So, erm, thank you Pearl?

It would be so unfaithful to Garnet’s character for Ruby and Sapphire to pop up all the time after the big reveal, because the whole point is that they’re in a stable fusion. But despite the circumstances, it’s great to see these two again. Charlyne Yi Ruby left a bombastic first impression in Jailbreak, so she’s always welcome, while Sapphire was barely in her debut, so we want to know more. And while later episodes like Hit the Diamond where the world isn’t falling apart are fun, characters in crisis are inherently interesting to watch.

The structure of Keystone Motel takes the familiar introductory approach of meeting new(ish) characters together, then separating them to explore them as individuals, then joining them again to see them as a unit in a new light. Gem Glow did it the same way, but now we have the benefit of sixty-three episodes of show to let us focus harder on the characters instead of meeting an entire world (even if we do touch on that with the new environment). And just as importantly, we also have sixty-three episodes establishing Steven’s particular lens.

I didn’t mention much of Steven in my Cry For Help review, as he exists solely as an observer with Amethyst, and of the two, Amethyst is far more important to the episode. He’s still great, particularly in the small meditative scene where he teaches Amethyst how to make her fingers float by crossing her eyes, but plotwise he’s an ancillary character in the Week of Sardonyx.

Except for here. In Keystone Motel, he spends most of the episode doing what he does for most of the week: distracting himself from the mess at home, and observing the Gems as they deal with Pearl’s actions without much interference. He’s not Amethyst, trying to make the peace or consoling his friends. Maybe one day he will be, but for now he’s a child, and it’s incredibly unfair to expect a child to act as a mediator between arguing parents.

Instead, all he can do is get upset, and at his breaking point he wonders aloud if mom and mom are fighting because of him. Logically, this is an absurd assumption: he saw what Pearl did and knew it was wrong, and Pearl is clearly who Ruby and Sapphire are arguing about. At no point does Ruby or Sapphire bring him into the conflict by accusing him of taking a side or getting mad at him for not backing them up. But when you’re stressed and confused by clashing parents, logic takes a backseat to emotion. Self-blame is a tried-and-true method of tricking yourself into thinking you have control over a situation that’s out of your hands: it sucks when something’s your fault, but it sucks even more to be powerless.

Unfortunately it’s a coping mechanism that Steven will learn too well when he takes the weight of his mother’s sins on his shoulders, but for now it doesn’t take long for his unwarranted guilt to crack Sapphire’s icy front. This turning point is definitely Steven’s biggest contribution to the week, because nobody else was in a position to move things forward. Ruby and Sapphire’s impasse was based on them each being so used to, and annoyed by, their reactions to upsetting situations.

Sapphire internalizes her emotions with the knowledge that things will resolve, and Ruby lashes out at everything like an eternal flame, baby. Neither is willing to show the vulnerability necessary to let down their defenses and talk things out, and both are stubborn enough for a feud to last for who knows how long: this is unstoppable force/immovable object territory. So just by expressing the emotional turmoil of a kid in a breaking home, Steven saves the day. And the show doesn’t even feel the need to verbalize that subtext, even though Greg is around and he loves doing that. Way to go, Keystone Motel.

Speaking of Greg, this may be his greatest episode as a side character. The distinction between being a main character or a side character is admittedly nebulous at times—for instance, which is he in Winter Forecast or Steven’s Birthday?—but here he’s a driving force (literally) who graciously cedes the spotlight to our leads, even though he’s killing it on the comedy front. From casually instructing Steven to call the police if his internet deal goes south to waxing poetic about pizza, his humor is grounded in his core dadness in a way that’s as funny as it is endearing. How great is his hyping up of motels and wanting to spend time with his son on a boring business trip? He’s just the sweetest.

And on top of his daditude, this episode gives us two great insights into Greg’s life outside of Steven. The first is the catalyst for the road trip in the first place: his need for cheap equipment for the car wash. We don’t focus on money much in Steven Universe until Greg hits it rich, but there’s a clear sense of financial hardship to a guy who lives in a van working at a car wash where business always seems slow. And while it’s never stated that he’s Steven’s sole financial provider, who else is getting this kid food and clothes? I love seeing the scrappy side of him that he largely hides from Steven (and thus us), and his chill attitude in poverty pays off in a big way when he’s just as chill with his sudden wealth.

The second is his brilliant reaction to seeing Sapphire: a weary “Oh boy, where’s the other one?” It helps that Tom Scharpling is so good at encapsulating Greg’s quintessential “oh boy” approach to conflict, but after We Need to Talk it’s another small reminder that Greg has a history with the Crystal Gems independent of Steven. Of course he already knows about Ruby and Sapphire.

I mentioned Charlyne Yi earlier, but oh my goodness is she amazing. I know I already compared Ruby to Daffy Duck in my Jailbreak review, but it’s honestly the highest compliment I can give: she’s frustration personified, and almost every frame where she’s not exploding is spent winding herself up to explode. Yi is everything to this character, starting at a fever pitch and maintaining a sputtering episode-long tirade without missing a beat. Look at those Rebecca Sugar sketches of Ruby: they’re based directly off of Yi’s physical performance while voice acting, which in turn directly influenced the animation:

Holy crow does this woman commit. Deedee Magno Hall might be my overall voice actor MVP for the show, but maybe the only thing stopping Charlyne Yi from taking the throne is Ruby and the rubies’ infrequent appearances.

Which is hardly to take away from Erica Luttrell, whose deep, slow serenity makes for Yi’s ideal counterpart. Like I said, it’s wonderful to see more of Sapphire than the blip we got in Jailbreak, and Luttrell terrifically conveys the emotions seething behind Sapphire’s icy exterior. Here, it’s all in the pauses, the perfectly uncomfortable moments as she works to keep her cool: it’s most notable in her frozen “I’m...fine” as ice tightens behind her.

(Fun fact: when Luttrell was a kid, she was the voice of Keesha on Magic School Bus, and when I was a kid, I loved Magic School Bus, so it was a delightful thing to learn.)

Although Garnet is obviously a blend of both Gems, we see far more patience than fury from her. So while Ruby’s a bunch of fun to watch (particularly as she rambles her way into the pool), the challenge is differentiating Sapphire from that other calm, collected, authoritative, and distant Gem with future vision and a deep voice and hidden eyes. The solution is to make her a bit too in touch with that future vision, and I love how it’s used for both humor and drama to showcase just how vital it is for Sapphire, and thus how important Ruby is at grounding her in the present.

The resolution of their argument is essentially Sapphire remembering this, and in doing so, Ruby finally cools down. Unfortunately her idea of cooling down involves putting herself down; just like in Jailbreak, she sees herself as worthless compared to Sapphire, which the latter thankfully disagrees with. The root of Ruby’s deep-set insecurities might not get explained until The Answer, but there’s a clear lived-in dynamic between these two that there really needs to be for the whole “fused together for thousands of years” relationship to make sense.

Finally, even if they’re short on screentime and Michaela Dietzes, Pearl and Amethyst leave a huge impression in this episode. Pearl’s in full manic mode, which is exactly where she should be, and I love the quiet scene of Amethyst consoling her as Steven comes back in. Garnet deserves to be the main focus of Cry for Help’s immediate fallout, but these two are still a major factor that shouldn’t be forgotten.

This isn’t a perfect episode. It might sound like a nitpick, but it bugs the hell out of me that the motel and diner are totally empty minus one waitress, especially when so much care was put into these new sets (although I do realize that the time spent on these new sets is likely why we don’t get new character models). It takes me right out of the critical diner scene every time I watch it to be reminded of the constraints of animation, which is a bummer on a show that’s so good at not doing that.

Still, our journey to the Keystone State (by which I of course mean the state named Keystone) is an important success. Time limitations often make arguments in episodic media pretty simple, but here we slow down to tackle the consequences of Cry for Help on multiple fronts: to even begin considering forgiveness, Ruby and Sapphire have to process their emotions after being betrayed. It’s a risky move, especially given how new these characters are, but it pays off in a way that deepens Garnet and the show as a whole.

Future Vision!

Mr. Greg, of all episodes, is a great follow-up to this adventure of Steven, Greg, and another Gem traveling to another state, staying in a rented room, and resolving tension between the two parent figures. Going to a hotel and rolling in money is nice, but it’s even better when juxtaposed against going to a motel and working to make ends meet.

We’re the one, we’re the ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR!

Even if it sucks that Ruby and Sapphire go on a break, I can’t say I’m unhappy to see them. While it’s not all that rewatchable for me given it’s in the middle of a pretty unpleasant Bomb, execution and tone go a long way.

Top Fifteen

Steven and the Stevens

Mirror Gem

Lion 3: Straight to Video

Alone Together

The Return

Jailbreak

Sworn to the Sword

Rose’s Scabbard

Coach Steven

Giant Woman

Winter Forecast

Chille Tid

Keeping It Together

On the Run

Warp Tour

Love ‘em

Laser Light Cannon

Bubble Buddies

Tiger Millionaire

Lion 2: The Movie

Rose’s Room

An Indirect Kiss

Ocean Gem

Space Race

Garnet’s Universe

The Test

Future Vision

Maximum Capacity

Marble Madness

Political Power

Full Disclosure

Joy Ride

We Need to Talk

Cry for Help

Keystone Motel

Like ‘em

Gem Glow

Frybo

Arcade Mania

So Many Birthdays

Lars and the Cool Kids

Onion Trade

Steven the Sword Fighter

Beach Party

Monster Buddies

Keep Beach City Weird

Watermelon Steven

The Message

Open Book

Story for Steven

Shirt Club

Love Letters

Reformed

Rising Tides, Crashing Tides

Enh

Cheeseburger Backpack

Together Breakfast

Cat Fingers

Serious Steven

Steven’s Lion

Joking Victim

Secret Team

Say Uncle

No Thanks!

4. Horror Club 3. Fusion Cuisine 2. House Guest 1. Island Adventure

(Like Keeping It Together, no official promo for this one. This time I’m going with the brilliant imamong, whose title cards for Steven Universe astound and amaze.)

#keystone motel #steven universe #su #steven universally #review

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chaseagainstonision · 7 years ago

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Also, wanted to post this since I just came across it on The Forums. I know it's long, but I feel that it's prob'ly important to read it and not put it under a read more: ------------------- On gerggles IRS audit, I took an uber pool yesterday and guess who was sharing/carpooling with me from the airport? AN IRS AUDITOR AGENT. I showed him the relevant info from the last thread, the house tour video, the items he was claiming for "business" on his taxes, and how much gerg made. The IRS agent laughed and said "he is so screwed". He said: -to claim something/a room for business (like a home office) to fully claim it as a business expense it can only and solely be used for business, if your child may use the home office let's say to do homework (personal use), it can only partially be claimed (50%, 60%, etc) and you would have to document and show how much of a percentage it was used for business compared to personal use -the only thing he could fully file as a business expense are the items necessary to film his YouTube videos (& related, merch,etc) so his cameras, mics, green screen, lights, editing software, etc. & computer (as long as said comp isn't used for any personal use & just for vids) -if his filming equipment is used for any personal (non YT business) related filming then it's only partially covered -the vast majority of the items gerg has filed as "business expenses" are not allowed and are not considered deductible (shit in the background of 1 or 2 vids, bathrooms, children's beds/rooms/playroom, roof, shed, lawnmower, staircase, hallways, couches, bed, etc.) -filing these items are common knowledge not business expenses and if onion intentionally did this to save money and avoid taxes he is commiting a crime -bc onion & his family live in the main house (where about 50% of items are claimed for business) it is not considered a home office and absolutely cannot be 50% claimed for business, at the maximum maybe 20% but it would still be a red flag -his personal wardrobe (regular clothes he wears for personal life that he sometimes wears in speaks) are not "business expenses", his teslas (both of them) are 100% not covered as a business expense (even if he uses it to drive collaborators, it could only be for the exact amount of hours he used it to drive them), the back up battery and solar panels are never & will never be covered & are considered luxury & not necessity -can only file a portion of the beds the collaborators sleep in for the exact amount of hours/days they sleep in them, must be documented, plus acknowledgment from collaborators w/ signature -the IRS will 100% do a house visit & he will be forced to comply (and no, a video tour means nothing to them & will likely be used as evidence against him) you have to have an IRL house tour (anything over 20% of a house claimed is immediate cause for house visit) -as they audit him, it will be concerning the past 3 years of his expenses/taxes, if they see red flags and a pattern of fraudulently filing personal items as business, which they will, they will go back even further to the past 5-10 years, basically anal raping him -if he has not carefully and meticulously been documenting each items use (hours/days used for business) AS IT WAS HAPPENING (or in the time period) with evidence, logs, 3rd party statements then he is fucked, they're not covered, and he has to pay up those back taxes -he cannot rush right now to create or get the documentation/evidence of business use at the last 2nd after he was informed of his audit -if they IRS concludes he knowingly/intentionally filed items that were not used SOLELY for business as a full business expense on his taxes (agent said ignorance doesn't count) then he will be SEVERELY fined, forced to pay every/all back taxes from the items he fraudulently filed as "business expenses", have his YT wages garnished (take $ out from his paycheck), and almost most likely if not surely will be charged criminally for tax fraud, tax evasion, etc. and depending on how many years he's done this for will affect the amount of criminal charges (which will result in jail time or probation & hefty fines) -even worse shit if he knowingly did this to be in a lower tax bracket (rich gets taxed more, poor gets taxed less) to pay less taxes -he is an independent contractor not a business owner -the IRS will factor in his 2nd house which is supposed to be for work/office/editing/filming and rip him to shreds over why then his family home is 50% "business expenses" -5 editing stations? They may (but most likely, since he's a solo channel, not buy that excuse) let him slide on that, but only partially on the comps bc they're used for personal too -IG selfies are not business related for gerg -shit gerg filed as "business expenses" for lainybots channel will not be covered (he will have to pay back taxes on all items he claimed for business for Lainey's channel, i.e. Her equipment, her comp, the fireplace?!) bc Lainy would have had to been documenting that for years herself and file it under her name as a "business expense" (not gerg) & prove her "business" is regular & turning regular income/profit & not just a hobby for a stay at home mom -this will all result in the IRS audit ripping his asshole so deep that he has a serious chance of receiving jail time or porbation (criminal charges), backtaxes for everything he fraudulently filed as "business expenses", massive fines for false filings, plus interest on all of it (which can add up based on how many years he's been doing this), and if he can't pay up (in the time or plan he has) they will start garnishing his YT paychecks, seizing his assets (such as his cars, expensive equipment, electronics, even his 2nd house, or any other properties in his name i.e. His mothers house/his old house-they go for the most expensive first) could all be FORCEFULLY seized to pay off his debt to the IRS, these seized assets will most likely occur since there's no way on earth onion has enough money to pay off the massive debt he will soon owe -he is without a doubt 100% "literally" committing a crime. being his 2nd audit regarding improper filings for "business expenses" (divorce from skye was 1st audit) they will show no mercy & not believe he was ignorant of the law, therefore showing intent to defraud, which is a crime of tax evasion, tax fraud which they will fully go after him for $$$ wise, possible court too since it's not his first time & intention to commit fraud to benefit financially >Tl;dr Best case- they fuck him hard but don't prosecute him for criminal charges but will still owe a massive amount of backtax, fines, interest, but give him a generous payment plan that he spends many years paying off, wages garnished, has to sell tons of shit, downsizing a lot Worst case- goes to jail for a few months, probation, assets seized, broke, files for bankruptcy, has to move to a studio apt, is toast & spergs like we've never seen Plus IRS agent said that any anons can go on the IRS website and speak to an agent on anon & ask them hypotheticals/questions Saged for long ass post (rry sorry just tried to distinguish solid faxxx from an IRS agent from our educated guesses) EDIT: for additional information -Sarah is not considered an employee, not bc she's underage, but bc of her age requiring paperwork, in accordance with their state law, she would require a form to be signed by her parents & school, the employer (grease) would require special permits, special insurance, as well as records proving age and documentations of work (along with not "working" between 7pm-7am) -Sarah's travel expenses, her "paycheck", and bed, shower, & food, etc can not be considered business expenses (or included in partial business expense for an item i.e. "race car bed collaborators slept in!!1" -Billie is not considered an employee, even though an adult can be in a romantic relationship with their employer(s) and still be legal employed, she & onion never filed any W2 forms & have no proper documentation of her hours/work/use of items being covered as business expenses -Billie cannot have travel expenses covered bc the beginning travel and all the rest of the flights were due to personal reasons, she didn't fly to them to be their employee -Billies "paycheck" isn't covered bc no proper documentation of hours/work/etc, no receipts, no contract (sex slave contract doesn't count), no taxes taken out of her pay (under the table payment, these would be filed be filed under billies name), no statement by Billie stating it was in exchange for labor (w/ hours, job description) -Billie can be considered an independent contractor to onision (an independent contractor himself), but without documentation of what exact hours she worked, etc then there's no way to prove when, what, & if she worked for gerg, therefore not covered, leading to all her expenses and use of items filed as "business expenses" to not eligible to be covered as business as well. -Since no documentation for Billies "work", it could be seen as a luxury personal expense (such as sugar babies being paid by their sugar daddies) -cannot have any collaborators (other big YTers) travel expenses covered unless he kept all the plane ticket receipts w/ proof that they were flown out for reasons directly related to his YT "business" -a video of him and the collaborator(s) is not legitamite evidence enough, bc it does not prove they were not there (or flown out) as friends for personal reasons, such as a friend in vlogs (& YTers don't deduct their expenses from their taxes) or hobby (such as Lainy is not paid a prectage of every vid of gregs shes in) -could say maybe they're (unpaid?) actors (depending on state, some sign up w/ actors guild is required, some not) but would still have to show evidence of receipts, documented AT THE TIME PERIOD (not years later) of exact days/hours worked (also with time items they used i.e. beds, 2nd house) but that's really a big maybe -this nigga can't file shit for any of his fake employees (jailbait) & YT ex-friends as business expenses on his taxes bc he has no documentation & are illegitimate

#onision #post

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egyptbra6-blog · 5 years ago

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#671 Wayne Kramer of the MC5, Opinions on Noname & Otis Rush

Show 670Show 671Show 672

October 5, 2018

As the lead guitarist of the groundbreaking political rock band the MC5, Wayne Kramer experienced both the highs of recognition and the sting of defeat. Jim and Greg talk with Kramer 50 years after the band's iconic debut Kick Out the Jams. They chat about his new memoir, the '60s Detroit rock scene and discuss his experiences with overcoming drug abuse and jail time. Jim and Greg will also review the new album from hip hop artist Noname and pay tribute to the late Chicago blues legend Otis Rush.

Subscribe via iTunesDownload This Episode

obit

Otis Rush

Blues musician Otis Rush was as noted for his guitar prowess as his vocal stylings. Credited as one of the architects of the West Side style of Chicago Blues, Rush's guitar solos would later inspire legends like Jimi Hendrix, Eric Clapton and Stevie Ray Vaughan. Rush was also the inspiration for one of Lester Bangs's last great pieces of writing:“Otis Rush Mugged By An Iceberg,”which is required reading in Jim's college courses. Greg says his earliest recorded work, a series of singles in the late 1950's for the Cobra record label in Chicago, would have been enough to cement his legacy as a legendary guitarist. Despite being a world-famous musician, Rush worked blue collar jobs to earn a living for many years. He died September 29, 2018 at 84 years old.

review

Noname Room 25

Noname is a rapper whose poetic roots shine on her debut studio album, Room 25. According to Greg, each listen to the album reveals new meaning. Jim notes that though this is the 26 year old rapper's first studio album, she's given us material for years through her many collaborations with other young artists out of the new Chicago school of hip-hop, including Chance The Rapper, Donnie Trumpet, and Saba, as well as through her well-received first mixtape, Telefone. This album finds her collaborating with up-and-comer Phoelix on production which, according to Greg, results in a 1990s East Coast hip hop sound. Jim adds that the vibe of the record is also reminiscent of artists like Common and D'Angelo (he notes that D'Angelo even gets a shoutout on the track "Don't Forget About Me." Room 25 marks a coming of age for Noname, and for both Jim and Greg, it proves that Noname is among the most exciting female voices in hip hop today.

JimGreg

interview

Wayne Kramer of the MC5

It's been 50 years this month since the Detroit rock band the MC5 recorded their debut album live, Kick Out the Jams! This week, our guest is MC5 guitarist and solo artist Wayne Kramer, author of the new autobiography The Hard Stuff. The MC5 were known for its political lyrics, energetic onstage charisma and punk attitude. The band influenced artists like The Clash, The Ramones and Rage Against the Machine. Since the breakup of the MC5 in 1972, Wayne has put out some great solo records and found success as a film and television composer. Kramer talks with Jim and Greg about the political music he was making in the MC5, the Detroit rock scene and about the thrill of performing live. He also discusses how he overcame his drug and alcohol addictions and what he learned from his two year stint in prison.

Featured Songs

Otis Rush, I Can't Quit You Baby, I Can't Quit You Baby (single), Cobra, 1956

Otis Rush, Double Trouble, Double Trouble (single), Cobra, 1958

Noname, Window (feat. Phoelix), Room 25, self-released, 2018

Noname, no name (feat. Yaw and Adam Ness), Room 25, self-released, 2018

Common, 6th Sense (feat. Bilal), Like Water For Chocolate, MCA, 2000

D'Angelo, Me and Those Dreamin' Eyes of Mine, Brown Sugar, EMI, 1995

Noname, Don't Forget About Me, Room 25, self-released, 2018

Noname, Regal, Room 25, self-released, 2018

Otis Rush, My Love Will Never Die, My Love Will Never Die (single), Cobra, 1957

MC5, Kick Out the Jams, Kick Out the James, Elektra, 1969

MC5, Motor City Is Burning, Kick Out the James, Elektra, 1969

MC5, Ramblin' Rose, Kick Out the James, Elektra, 1969

MC5, The American Ruse, Back in the USA, Atlantic, 1970

MC5, Rocket Reducer N. 62 (Rama Lama Fa Fa Fa), Kick Out the James, Elektra, 1969

MC5, Gotta Keep Movin', Back in the USA, Atlantic, 1970

MC5, Sister Anne, High Time, Atlantic, 1971

Wayne Kramer, Poison, The Hard Stuff, Epitaph, 1995

MC5, Starship, Kick Out the James, Elektra, 1969

The Stooges, Search and Destroy, Raw Power, Columbia, 1973

Ted Nugent, Cat Scratch Fever, Cat Scratch Fever, Epic, 1977

Wayne Kramer, Crack in the Universe, The Hard Stuff, Epitaph, 1995

MC5, Looking At You, Back in the USA, Atlantic, 1970

MC5, Future/Now, High Time, Atlantic, 1971

MC5, Let Me Try, Back in the USA, Atlantic, 1970

Ness Nite, Tightrope, Dream Girl, POW Recordings, 2018

Madonna, Hung Up, Confessions on a Dance Floor, Warner Bros, 2005

Billy Bragg, Sexuality, Don't Try This at Home, Elektra, 1991

Boogie Down Productions, The Bridge Is Over, Criminal Minded, B-Boy, 1987

John Lennon, How Do You Sleep, Imagine, Apple, 1971

Source: https://www.soundopinions.org/show/671

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nate-the-ok · 6 years ago

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Sugar Napkins Glass

One of my larger projects, written in a particular mood, then I got out of the mood. Lost interest. Its a time investment, fair warning

Sugar, Napkins, Glass: Chapter 1

Scrape. Scrape. Scrape. The things sea air does to cream cheese.

Scrape. Scrape. Scrape. (Three more furious scraping sessions)

It was late evening on the isles of Costa Marco, and Greg Sattle was deeply contemplating how drowning actually felt as he psychologically held his nose and cleaned the day`s cream cheese stains from the floors of his seaside café, The Port Side. He certaintly never imagined himself as the owner of some cream-colored scene out of a Martha Stewart Magazine, but crazier things have been done for love. Well perhaps not, Greg thought to himself. Ships were launched. Hundreds, perhaps thousands have died. But no one surely would subject themselves to ten years of imprisonment in a coffee shop. Her name, as apt as names go, has changed over the years. First, it was Elizabeth. Then, it was Liz. Then it was Ellie. After that it was Mom. Now its…well there are a plethora of profanities on Costa Marco relating to nagging old sea hags.

As the sun set over the ocean waves, bubbling and rippling the light from a distance, inducing a trance-like state for all of the barely clothed onlookers, Greg scanned the beaches, reigning down his mighty judgement upon all of god`s creation.

“Perverts. Sicophants. Mankind is a disgusting thing. All of these people, living artificial lives in artificial clothes, with artificial personalities, having sex with each other and drinking and lazing about. The fat jiggling bipeds live meaningless lives, consuming and consuming and consuming. A colony of walruses lives with more honor”

While deep in his sociopathic rants, Greg`s only son and heir to his legacy, Samuel, sauntered over to his father.

“Hey uhh, dad”

Greg hated his son. He was positive that he was the dumbest person on the entire island. No, the entire planet. It wasn`t even that that bothered him. It was his stupid, rage inducing manner of speech. It was a cross between the calm, swaying way of the islanders, and a lifetime of listening to the worst music god ever created. It was like listening to a four year old whine about having wet himself for 23 years. There were many occasions where Greg would chuckle to himself as Sam stubbed his toe on a door, or got beat up by a gang of street thugs. Ah the glories of cosmic justice he thought to himself. Now he approaches, likely to ask for something, as all weak willed individuals do on a regular basis.

“Yes Sam?” Greg said with obvious disdain, mocking Sam`s imperceptiveness, and crying on the inside that his son would always be, that stupid.

“I was just wondering if you wanted to loan me like uh…fifty bucks?”

Another thing that bothered Greg about Sam. He had zero charisma. He came off as needy and useless as he actually was. The only job he could ever get, was washing dishes at the cafe, which somehow, he still showed up late for. You couldn`t send him to military school to straighten him out, because they`d probably kill him for being such an annoying little shit, and say it was an accident. It was that part, that he regretted that his son would die, that really bothered Greg. Why god? Why other than by blood relations should I care about this…

“What exactly for?” Greg retorted

“Um…Im taking a girl on a date and I uh…need some spending money”

It was here that Greg paused. Surely, with this small investment of mere material gains, perhaps this will finally change sam`s silly ways. Hopefully he falls in love with this girl, and eventually she breaks his heart, that always toughens up a man in the end. Good god was sam a virgin? It`s a distinct possibility, but how could he know? Sam never confided in Greg. Ever. What the hell. Maybe it`s worth a shot.

“Sure, here…consider it a bonus…actually it`s not a bonus you`re a terrible worker and if you weren`t my son i`d fire you”

“Thanks dad!” Sam replied with renewed elation, as he scurried out the door, hopping into the old convertible Greg had gave him for his nineteenth birthday. Another failed attempt at manning him up.

“Maybe im just a shitty parent” Greg said out loud to himself.

Maybe he`s a lot of shitty things. However, that`s not nearly the most important part of this story.

“Oh a whisky oh a danny, when will the whisky run dry?” Bellowed each member of the small crew. Caribbean lobsters were rare, but in recent years, their populations blossomed, for almost unfathomable reasons. Regardless, dozens of fishing companies cropped up around Costa Marco, looking to cash in on a commoditiy, which pound for pound, was more valuable than gold. Of this small crew of the “Sandy Boot”, there was Rook, the boats` captain. He was a truck driver, for more years than he cared to remember, or forget for that matter. When the sea called to him, he remembered childhood stories his grandmother told him, of sailors and pirates, of heroes, and most importantly, drunks. Those decades of sitting in the cab of a truck, passing by non-descript highway rest stops and meaningless landmarks gave him a hunger for a real culture, and companionship. Sure there was the occasional bar-room hookup, as many as a guy as old and as fat as him could get but…he wanted a friend. More than anything.

Rook did the song justice, and drained the last swig of whisky from the clear glass bottle. Happily giggling as he spun the thin aluminum wheel around in the cabin making a course for home, while the other members of the crew scoffed in sarcastic disappointment. The small lobster boat only cost the crew a collective fifteen grand to purchase and insure, but had already made them incredible returns. None felt the weight of that more than Trip, the crew`s most experienced fisherman, but also the poorest. You see, Trip was a local to Costa Marco. His ancestors were slaves, and each preceding generation were slaves. First to white men, then to oppressive governments, then to drugs, and finally, to the sea. Many of the ethnic locals to Costa Marco are fishermen. But not all of them were ever good fishermen. All of them, save for Trip. To anybody else, he was just another kid who knocked some poor girl up, and ruined the rest of his life, trying to take care of a kid. To Trip and Louisa, they were in paradise. Sure they lived in a small apartment by the docks. Sure they didn`t own a car, or even have a checking account. What they did have however, was the kind of love that we all refuse to believe is real, and a beautiful baby boy to match. Their life went as followed. Trip would get up early in the morning, and join the rest of the crew on the boat to fish. Louise would wake with the sunrise and feed their child, sipping tea and reading books, gossiping with her neighbors on the beach behind their home. As the sun went down, she would build a fire, and cook a meal of chopped fish and island fruits. When Trip returned, he would walk onto the beach, lay on the sand next to his wife, take his son in his arms, and they would laugh until the fire left their minds, and fell to embers. When the clock struck ten, the three of them would settle down to bed, and the process would begin again. I`d wager that at the time, since Trip had finally been able to bring in good money, they were the happiest people alive.

As that rusty old boat pulled into the docks, and Trip called to Louise, Margo was tying off ropes, and looking over cages that had been damaged, eager to repair them. She was a kind of inquisitive, thoughtful human being that had been completely ensnared by the mere concept of rope in general. She could not explain just how-hold on a second, a woman? On a boat? Believe it or not, yes. A woman on a boat. Perhaps it was because Rook`s guilty pleasure was staring at her ass when she pulled a cage up from the sea. Perhaps it was the fact that on Costa Marco, everyone was too laid back to care at all. In reality, it was the mutual understanding between workers, that if you wanted the money, you worked hard for it, and you weren`t a total bitch, then you could fish like anyone else. It was that kind of atmosphere that Margo really craved. The kind of togetherness and happiness that was alive in the isles of Costa Marco. She could walk the streets on a Friday night, and join any party she wanted. Smile with whoever she wanted, laugh with whoever she wanted, and drink with whoever she wanted. It was her other craving though, that drove her to the fishing industry, and to the seclusion of the house she was able to purchase, just outside of town.

Cinnitar. A strange name for an incredibly popular opioid. It`s popularity wasn`t in it`s nature or it`s flawless marketing. It`s popularity was based on it`s safety. Margo would walk home from the boat after Rook distributed the previous day`s pay, spend a third of it on Cinnitar, and crash at her place, unwinding slowly into a peaceful, yet dreamless sleep. The gimmick associated to Cinnitar was that no matter how much of it you took, you couldn`t die, and there were virtually no side effects. While initially created to humanely kill family pets, when the formula was released to the general public, crafty chemists soon realized the drug`s massive potential. Margo had a massive amount of reasons to take the drug, but only one that she really couldn`t get out of her head. Her Abortion. Breaking up with Grant. She wasn`t supposed to feel guilty. It was the right thing to do. She was taking control of her body, and her life. Where did that ever get her? Where could it have gone? These kinds of questions only frightened her more when she knew Trip`s story, and watched his family eat dinner on the beach a hundred times. She wanted that, more than anything she wanted that, but she made that choice a thousand years and a thousand miles ago, and there was no way to go back. So it was here, that she would lay back on the hammock, ladle some Cinnitar into her arm, and imagine she made the choice she wanted, maybe even the right choice.

Suddenly, the newest member of the crew, Spencer, was knocking at her door. Margo couldn`t even stand to respond, and hoped he would just go away. She only ever invited him over along with the whole crew one time, as a housewarming party, but besides that, she had been a hermit. Spencer though, was persistent, knocking away like an idiot, because he saw her going in there…which yes, means that he followed her.

“Oh well, I guess she was just tired from fishing today. It was pretty hot out” he sighed to himself.

Margo relaxed back into her hammock. She liked Spencer. As far as guys went on all the islands, he was pretty cute. But it had only been…two years? Since she up and left her home in Georgia to find her way in the carribean, just to throw herself at the map and see where she could stick. It had been a long time, she thought. Maybe too long. Maybe she should give Spencer a shot, she thought, but before she could explore that line of reasoning, another wave came over her, and she was further back in that hammock than ever before, further back in her past and her guilt.

Walking home at night on Costa Marco is a very surreal experience. There are Boas hanging in the trees, pigs and dogs scurrying about, and when you hit the city, it`s a complete paradigm shift. There are vibrantly dressed locals and self-proclaimed locals dancing and drinking and laughing, jabbering and swooning to the hastily strummed guitars and battered drums. When Spencer left that small but happy place in the world, he turned down the many streets until he reached his own little cobblestone corner. Really a treasure of an abode, an old colonial townhouse, shoulder to shoulder with the infinite, but not quite well laid out rows of the other townhouses. He turned the old iron key, creaking open the heavy wooden door, into his own little grain scented shelter. Throwing wood into the fireplace, and firing up his laptop, he began to peruse his greatest passion… bread. Artisan, hand crafted, wood baked, the boy was obsessed. You see, Costa Marco was surprisingly devoid of this kind of bread industry. No dish, local or otherwise served or prepared on the islands required it, in fact, one would be looked upon with a small amount of disdain if seen eating a sandwich. This kind of atmosphere suffocated Spencer. He wanted to share his passion for bread with everyone he knew, by opening his own bakery. You could imagine by this description, that Spencer was a simple kind of guy, but in a magnificently pleasant kind of way. Spencer had spent most of his life travelling, as his father and mother were both in the navy, which meant that for the most part, spencer grew up on naval bases and with other navy kids. They all wanted to follow right in line with their parents, as disciplined and honorable scholars, pilots, or sailors. Spencer wanted none of that. All he wanted, was his bakery. It is hard to determine when, where or how he became obsessed with bread, or why frankly anyone cares, but all this interest is a testament to, is the kind of purity of heart Spencer possessed.

“Just a few more weeks” Spencer muttered to himself with a smile,

“And they`ll all see”…He trailed off, sensing he was tired, and rising to his bedroom. With each thunk of the heavy wooden steps he thought of Margo. How pretty she was. How her hair glistened in the midday sun. How the waters rolled off her skin. Yes, this is love, he thought.

The crew of the sandy boot were a lively bunch. The money was good, but what would it mean if they couldn`t buy paradise in…paradise. Poor old Greg was no exception. As he forked the thin steel key out of the decrepid lock of the café, and wandered over to his old Toyota truck, he began for the first time in his life, to seriously examine the choices he had made. For an inimaginable amount of time, Greg was locked in his relationship with Liz. Funny. He hadn`t even called her that in his thoughts in years. He could sense it. Just like how he sensed some asshole slowly crawling up his tail light on the old highway.

“Why I oughta” Greg snarled to himself, well aware that he only said that due to the fact thousands of other faces on the televisions did before him,

What he “oughta” do became less and less clear. His stream of consciousness was inundated with images of graphic, brutal violences he would inflict on the morally devoid creature that parasitically perched itself on his mechanical posterior. While making a curve on the old road, he caught a good glimpse of the driver in his rear-view mirror. It was just some...average young woman. Really nothing of great stereotypical or demonstrative worth. Suddenly, a wave of sympathy overcame Greg. Maybe she was just having a bad day. Maybe she was just angry about something. Maybe he had tailgaited her some time ago, and this was her form of revenge. Maybe, and entirely possibly, she was thinking the very same thoughts he was in his car, driving home late at night. Wondering about all the things he had done, the bills he had to pay, or the big decisions he would have to make. And a big decision, he certaintly did have to make. And it would pertain to whether or not he would stay with Liz.

It wasn`t like it was rocket science. Greg wasn`t always this spiteful, this mean, or even this domecticated. Liz hated camping. Before he met her, he could barely stay out of the woods.

“Yeah, Camping. Another thing to look foreward to when she`s out of the picture” Greg said aloud to himself, in rhythm with the soft country music on the radio.

“And that stupid kid of ours. He can be HER problem”. His voice began to rise with elation, as if the lightball was slowly coming on in his head.

“And I can finally smoke a cigar, inside or out…Hell ill be sure to ash`em right in the carpets”. The rhythm was infecting his reasoning, a little song being invented as he talked more and more.

“Oh yeah you bet it baaabay, that I`ll be smokin` up the town…do do do, pah do do pah pah… Oh yeah won`t be a clean carpet arooooooouuund” He laughed and tapped on his wheel as he sang his little song, all the way up his driveway.

Greg didn`t even bother to go in the house anymore. The ol` salty sea skank (his favourite colloquialism), would always be there to ask him how much money he made at the café that day.

“It was your idea bitch, and you`d know how much we were making if you ever left the house”

Greg pondered that hypothetical strategy in an argument as he walked into the shed, and flicked then lights on. Upon the table, lay his only true love. His beautiful bearded lizard, which he named Tequila. Greg…Greg was the kind of guy who loved to watch things. To be in control. There was nothing Greg loved more than to feed Tequila, in the morning before he went to work, and at night when he came home. Despite the fact that all the simple lizard ever gave him was the occaisional eyeball lick, or even a rare nibble on his fingers, Greg interpreted that as true affection.

“Oh little Tequila, you look so hungry!” Greg said, opening the cabinet above the lizard`s massive tank, and pulling out a small colony of grasshoppers.

Greg thought for a moment as he fauned over his pet, and smirked when he said, “So hungry that these little sons of bitches…might not be enough”

Greg put the grasshoppers back in the cabinet, and pulled another tank up from the ground across the floor. Within, rested half a dozen garter snakes, just now becoming startled at being lifted on the table.

Then, with the methodical preparation of a serial killer, Greg donned a leather apron and a pair of leather gloves, grabbing the fattest snake from the tank, and sealing the rest away. Greg took time to examine the creature, ensuring that it wouldn`t be strong enough to possibly hurt cute little Tequila. Of course none of those snakes stood a chance, but even a scratch on one of his stubby little legs would deeply disturb Greg. He gingerly placed the snake in the opposite end of Tequila`s tank, pulled up a chair, cracked a beer, and just watched.

Tequila was quick to take notice. It wasn`t very often that he had roomates. The new company was very exciting, but quite strange. Like an innocent, scaley puppy, tequila plodded off of his log, and towards this new arrival.

“Hold on a moment” Tequila thought to himself, slowing his pace as he analyzed the scent of the creature. He approached with caution…and a feeling…came over him…

Within a flash, bits and pieces of his new friend were strewn throughout the sand, a chunk of it`s torso sliding down his gullet.

“No…Not Again!”

Greg was sufficiently appeased by this display, and took the time to clean the cage while Tequila was occupied with his food, and changed his water.

“Isn`t it maaaaagic” Greg sang to himself, as he closed down the shed, and turned off all the lights, only dimming Tequila`s light in his tank.

“He gets scared of the dark…musn`t do that to him” He muttered, having thought about it and said that phrase a thousand times by now, it had become more of a routinely incensed nervous tick, for now Greg would have to actually go inside his house, and face his wife, which especially as of late, had become thornier than Tequila. Yes, thornier. Nothing else… weirdo.

Greg walked up to the bug screened back door, and as he climbed the second of the three steps, the light above the door came on, which meant that Liz was fast approaching, likely having seen Greg leave the shed. He opened the door, with her standing in front of him, crossing her arms and staring at him with pursed lips. She always had a flair for the dramatic. Never seemed to like existing in a state of calm or contentment. As far as Greg knew, she loved to be miserable and combative.

Greg wasn`t really in the mood for one of her fits. He knew how the argument would go. He knew exactly what she would nag him about. The Café isn`t making enough money, the house needs renovating, you need to spend more time with sam, you need to work out. It was the last part that bothered Greg the most. His physique had never been exemplary, he knew this, and he thought she knew this. Where did this desire for a six pack and biceps appear? When she started to have to shimmy through the closet door sideways?

After a single, tense moment, Greg simply put his keys on the hook beside the door, and walked on by. Sure it required one awkward shove, and really did nothing to appease Liz, but what was the point? All she wanted to do was argue till the sun came up.

He casually walked over to the kitchen and pulled some raw fish he had bought from the market two days earlier, prepared a skillet, and began to sear it on the electric oven, not expressing a single emotion aside from blank disdain as she walked in, still pouting about…well he didn`t even bother to find out.

He kept standing over that fish, casually turning from side to side as he grabbed various spices off the racks beside the stove. Ultimately, he found her performance entertaining and predictable. She had done this a thousand times. She would continue to do this a thousand times. It had been years since he stopped wondering what he could do, what he could say so she would finally hug him after a long day of work…again Greg felt regret.

“How terribly attached to a terrible woman have I become? I would be so much happier if I just…left. But I can`t…How fickle the heart is”

He remembered when they first moved into the house. They had arguments yes, but they were small, never lasted long, and were always resolved. He thought that was the sign of how resilient they were as a couple. Over time though, with the innumerable failures of Sam, the highs and lows of the café, the hurricane…Their arguments grew more fierce. They could argue for hours. First it was a low rumble. Then it was a scream. At least he`d get the occasional “I love you” from her. Nowadays, he couldn`t even remember the last time he, or even she said it.

He could remember the last time they cooked together. It was beef stew. He remembered the sound of her laughter as they casually splashed the red wine into the broth and their glasses. He remembered how warm she felt in his arms as they fell asleep on the porch, stinking of wine and spilled stew.

“Yes…that was the last time we were happy together” he thought to himself.

He slid the fish off the skillet and onto a pan, turning around and placing it on the table, unsuprised to see he wife still standing there in the doorway, maintining that blank, judgemental expression. He sat down, pushed the plate to the side slowly, and motioned for her to sit down. Slowly, she rose from her stance, and took the chair across from him. After a long moment of silence, and losing the staring contest with the tribal figurine in the middle of the table, Greg spoke.

“Aren`t you tired?” He asked, deliberately, implying so much with so little.

In complete understanding of the implications, she replied

“I…Yes… I am”

“How long has it been…since you were actually happy to see me?” He asked, having completely forgotten about the fish growing cold beside him.

“Too long” She curtly replied.

There was another long pause as Greg began to feel a wash of emotions come over him. He really loved her. There was no denying that. He began to process the thought of her not loving him, images of her leaving, of her looking away when he passed her on the street. It began to destroy him in ways he couldn`t imagine. He couldn`t stop it, he had already set in motion.

“ Do you still love me?” He asked, having asked a thousand times before in the past as a rhetorical question, always replied with “of course idiot”, or “you know I do”. This was the first time he really meant it, and really wondered. And it really hurt.

There was another long silence. Everything felt colder, and darker to Greg. His life, and his worldview were hanging in the balance. The fact that she even took a second to consider sent him spinning. It felt like a knife was being pulled out of his chest, the sheer anticipation of what he knew would come next.

Liz rose from her chair, and took a picture off the wall. It was from years ago, when the whole family had taken their first vacation together. Greg was standing over Liz, his hands on her shoulders, as She was sitting on a canoe, sam in her arms, still a baby. She came back to her chair, and put the picture on the table, staring at it for yet another agonizing eternity.

“I loved you for who you were…but not for who you are”

He could not think. He could not speak. He responded as blankly and as simply as he could muster.

“In that case…I want you out of the house by next week”

“What? Greg that`s completely unreasonable” she said, which to Greg indicated that she wanted to go, and she wanted to for a long time. It also enraged him for some reason, that she would have the gall to break his heart, and still ask for reparations.

“I don`t particularly care. Actually, here`s the deal. I`ll give you that goddamned café, and ill keep the house, which I paid for by actually working at MY café. I swear to god if you say it`s somehow yours to give, the only claim you have was that it was your goddamned idea. It`s in my legal name, I did all the work to get the land, to build the damn thing, and still ran it for ten years. Take whatever damn money you`ve got saved and get an apartment in town. Maybe you`ll find a skinny Cuban guy to sleep with while you`re there!” Greg yelled.

“Just…fuck you Greg. Fuck you.” Liz replied, tears streaming down her face as she ran upstairs, the clunk of her suitcase slamming to the floor. Greg didn`t care. This was the hundredth argument they had gotten in, and he was making sure this was the last. He was angry, but only as a way to drown out just how upset he really was.

The sound of the suitcase hitting the floor, of dressers flying open, was the melody to which Greg went on his laptop in the living room, and electronically transferred ownership of the café over to Liz. He promptly went into their bank account, destroyed the split account, taking what was his, and establishing his own account. “Hmm…She only has $38,000 left…How did she even earn that much?”. He didn`t bother to find out. He had now financially cut her out of his life. The wonders of the internet.

There was a pang of regret in Greg. Perhaps this was too extreme. Maybe it was, but there was no coming back from what he just did. Those two minutes of conversation could have gone a thousand different ways. It began to feel like he chose the worst way possible. All he wanted was for Liz to love him again, but instead, he pushed her away. Was it justified? After years and years of these arguments maybe it was. He just felt like he needed to…pull the plug, so to speak. Just to cut it off and end it. So, he reasoned, like any other case of amputation, it would hurt, but in the end, he would be better off. Still, he wouldn`t have an arm. That was ultimately the question. Would Greg rather have a cancerous, venomous part of his life that made him miserable, or not have that at all? What was worse? What Greg did know is that it was too late to wonder. He had tried medicating for decades, with know sign of remission. Now, Liz was coming down the stairs, and Greg began to be so upset that he couldn`t think of any more medical juxtapositions.

What was worse was that she didn`t even look at him when she went out the door. All he could yell at her was that the Café was her responsibility now, and she`d have to find a way run it in the morning. He remembered the keys in his pocket, and threw the café key in her car as she opened the passenger door to throw her suitcase in. She still did not look at him. She refused to look at him. Even when she was pulling out of the driveway, She didn`t even look towards the house, and sped off to town. So Greg stood there, on the porch, and for the first time in fifteen years, he cried.

It wasn`t like how he imagined. The house didn`t feel free. A weight wasn`t lifted off his shoulders. It felt empty. Like there were still parts of it that were actually hers. He wanted to call her. He wanted to tell her he was sorry, that she should come back and they could talk things over. It was too late though. He knew her. She would take this whole incident to heart. She would go through with it, regardless of how she still felt about him. The ultimate issue was that they both loved each other, but they couldn`t stand each other. It was a sick, unhealthy way of existing, and Greg sought to excise those feelings as he cleaned up the bedroom and the bathroom, putting whatever she left behind in a box, which he was debating either burning, burying, or throwing at her whenever she found out where she lived. Fortunately she was pretty good about it… in fact it was too good. Maybe she had rehersed this. Maybe she was just waiting for this argument, the go ahead, the justification to finally leave. She had to have been thinking about it. Way more than he actually was.

The reality was that when you`re married to a woman for thirty years, she accumulates more crap than she could possibly fit in one exceptionally large suitcase. She took the essentials, her clothes, her jewelry, so on and so forth. What did she leave behind? The kind of things that hurt to still see. Photos. Letters. Little arts and crafts, any kind of sentimental object.

“Regardless” Greg said to himself.

“This was going to happen one day or another…just when and how were the only questions…doesn`t change the fact that I still feel like shit about it.”

There really isn`t anything he could do except just sit on the bed, and imagine what life would now be like. Where his fit of rage and honesty really put him. He didn`t have a job anymore. That was something to consider. What could he even go for? He had a degree in business management, and sociology. He had years of experience running small restaurants. Those kind of credentials don`t get you far in this kind of a place. What really mattered was that he was old, fat, and…didn`t have Liz. He felt guilty about not being more sympathetic. About not feeling at all bad for essentially kicking her out in the middle of the night. It was just…her words. I loved you for who you were…not for who you are”. She had, without any kind of anger or impotice, said the most hurtful thing Greg ever heard in his life. He regretted ever complaining about her, even though that complaining was mostly to himself. He was angry, shocked, and plunged into this deep pit of depression all in an instant. The fact that he suddenly lost control of his emotions wasn`t forgivable but to Greg…it was understandable.

-----------

Greg awoke the next morning, with a pain in his chest. The knife wound from earlier had moved to the center of his chest, slowly ripping and tearing. It no longer felt metaphorical. It was a literal, real pain, and as he saw it… it was all his fault.

“What am I thinking?” he said to himself, squinting his eyes as he sat up in the morning sunlight.

It was eight o`clock in the morning. He normally got up at six to get to the shop and open by seven, but what the hell. It`s not his problem anymore.

“I am a grown ass man and I`m pining after that hag?”

Oh god of course. The only reason he was sad was because he only chose to remember the good parts of their marriage which to be honest, were just as she described. They started good, and tapered off around… jesus a quarter of the way through? Did he not remember the endless, pointless, and frustrating fights they would get in? How she would blame him for how Sam turned out? No. He shouldn`t feel sad. The only reason he does was…human nature.

“Yeah… that`s gotta be it.” Greg thought.

He got up, and went through his typical morning routine, plus a mug of rum and fatefully, a cigar on the porch. As he took deep, long tokes on the sweet treasure he had denied himself for years, he began to remember what kind of a man he really was.

“Just getting in touch with my ego. It`s what Freud would want”

Suddenly, he remembered his only friend, and ran to the shed. He scooped up little Tequila from his tank, and placed him in a basket (formerly used for bath towels…why would you want a smaller towel? Why not just the one size towel? Another annoying mystery of Liz) beside him, pouring him a little dish of rum.

“This is the life eh Tequila? A bit of rum, the lazy island breeze, and the cool morning sun…I just feel like staying right here. Doing absolutely nothing. In that way I guess we aren’t that different eh little man?”

Tequila had already taken a few sips of the rum, and began to feel groggy, making a movement with his head that appeared to Greg as a nod.

“The food god has poisoned me…the sweet smelling liquid was a deception…”

The spiny lizard felt the warmth of the sun on his scales, and reminisced on the few times he ever saw the great ball of orange light.

“Perhaps I am dying…why else would the food god bring me here?”

Hours indeed did pass. The sun rose, and all the island birds were chirping and cawing. Greg used to think it was an annoying racket, but now, a little buzzed on the rum and having meditiated in this state for some time, it was a chorus, more beautiful and sanctified than any church choir he ever listened to as a kid.

Greg felt sore, and decided to rise from his seat, and noticed that Tequila had finished his bowl of rum, and now was listing around his basket, attempting to escape.

“I think it`s high time I did something…that I expanded your perspective”

He picked up Tequila, and brought him in the house. He had never left the confindes of his tank, save for the one time Greg brought him out in the yard to run around a little bit. He gently laid him on the couch, set out a plate of pre-killed grasshoppers and a dish of water, and closed the door behind him.

“I`m just curious as to what the hell happens” he giggled to himself.

“Also as to what…has happened”

He grew morose, and finally decided to assess the damage on what happened the night before. As he was pulling out of the driveway, he questioned for but a moment, the soundness of the decision to let Tequila have his way with the house. Before he could consider that for any longer, he saw Sam pull into the driveway, or attempt to. For the first time in his life, Sam looked truly angry with his father. Greg sighed, and pulled back in the driveway, getting out and leaning against the bed of the truck as Sam pulled in himself.

“Hey Dad can you tell ME what uh, happened last night?” Sam said, with a kind of difficulty that made it very apparent he was inexperienced with this emotion.

“When did you find out?” Greg said, with the kind of calm respect he never gave to Sam. He was innocent here. He deserved to be treated with respect when it came to this, of all things.

“Last night Dad. Mom`s staying at my place right now” Sam answered, still pseudo angry with Greg

You mean the apartment I pay for? Greg thought. No. This wasn`t the time for bitterness or sarcasm about anything. Not with Sam.

“Sam, I know you`re a man and you have a lot of things of your own to worry about and pay attention to but…you must have known this was coming”

“OF COURSE I did dad! I just never thought you would be the one to…do it. And that way? Do you know how mom feels right now?”

Greg sighed heavily, and moved to the porch. Sam followed, eagerly awaiting his father`s answer. Greg sat back down in his chair, and sparked up the short cigar he had been working on since the morning.

“Come on Sam…Sit down” Greg motioned to the other seat, formerly Liz`s seat, back when he and Liz used to do things like that together. Sam complied, and pulled the chair over to sit beside his father. Greg looked out at the island and the jungle, the ocean and the birds flying over the canopy. Sam sat staring at his father, incredibly nervous as to what he would say next. Greg looked over, and began.

“As you know very well, your mother and I loved each other very much, and that`s how and why you came about…but that was a very long time ago. Now we just make each other miserable, and we just need to go our own directions”

“That still doesn`t explain why you were so fucking rude about it” Sam said, calmly responding. It was the first time he had ever cursed in his father`s prescence, and frankly, it impressed him.

Greg took another cigar from the wooden box, and waved it as an offering to Sam. Sam nodded, and awkwardly fumbled the lighter as he lit it up. He coughed, and took the cigar between his thumb and index finger, resting his arm on the arm of the chair, the way all the mob bosses did in the movies.

“You know what kid…you`re right. Maybe it was a bit much for me to have done what I did and said what I said the way I said it last night. I can`t take that back…but you know what? If I did it any other way, your mom and I would have second guessed it, gotten back together, and six months later I`d be thinking about doing the exact same thing again. I know it was a shitty thing to do but…that`s how your mom and I are. That`s how it would have worked out either way”

Sam didn`t seem satisfied with the explanation, and kept looking off in the distance, waiting for a further explanation.

“Listen, just help your mom out for a few weeks so she can find a place and get back on her own two feet. I assure you, after all of this is over, her and I are going to be far better off, and you`ll start to see that in both of us”

Sam continued to stare foreward, but then began to speak.

“I just can`t understand it. How two people can be together so long and now…it just happened so fast”.

“Yeah kid… it still kinda feels like just a…nightmare right now. Like it hasn`t really happened”

“Do you still care about her?”

“I`m…I`m not sure”

They now both stared foreward. For the next moment, Sam put the cigar in his mouth, stood up, and went to his car without saying goodbye. Greg couldn`t imagine it. He had lost Liz, and now he wasn`t sure if he had lost his son. It felt wrong, but he indulged his desire to ash his cigar, which had gone out in the long pauses of his conversation. He leaned over the chair to the rug, made two little eyes, and pondered what kind of face he should make. Had everything happened the way he thought, maybe it would have been happy. Had he really and truly regretted his decision, it would have been sad. All he could accomplish was a long, straight, simple stroke along the pattern.

There is a kind of surreal nature to the inside of Spencer’s bedroom. The junglewood timbers and the two hundred year old stonework of the roof are the first things he lays eyes on in the morning. When he gets up and looks around, there is a computer, and a primitive modern plumbing system jammed into the old washroom. The space felt hijacked by modern amenities and the ever demanding creature comforts of a technological generation. As Spencer rises, he is careful to have a steady hand as he shaves with the straight razor he bought at the old market when he got off the boat, appalled by the apparent lack of multiple blade technology. While it had been six months since then, and his aim had improved, not a week would go by before he would give himself a solid nick on the jaw, and he would be reminded of this embaressment when the salt of the sea was splashed in his barely visible wound.

He was always a hard working kid, who quickly got over the whole “up ‘for dawn” moans and groans that were associated with being a professional fisherman. It took a particular kind of talent to get in his fishing overalls and his graphite grey hoodie, make a decent pot of coffee in the five dollar French press he had to work with, and head down to the docks in time, all with only three lights in the house.

While it was dark in his house, when Spencer began to walk the streets is when his childhood fears really began to resurface. At least at night the darkness was always dulled by the sound of music and the songs of drunken tourists. This early in the morning, most everyone who was out the night before was holed up somewhere, or was enigmatically dumped in a gutter, resulting in more than one occasion when he would accidentally kick one. The resulting groan would scare the hell out of Spencer, sending him nervously jogging down the street for a moment, before he looked back and saw a tattered figure slowly shift on the ground. The sight gave him no relief, but he endured.

The morning air in the town of Tileo had a bitter, metallic tang to it, which began to mix with the smell of dead or dying fish and sea air as he approached the docks.

“soon… it’ll be cinnamon… flour… rye” Spencer said to himself, panting as he shuffled towards the docks.

Rook was always the first to greet the crew as they arrived. He didn’t wake up any earlier than the rest of them, he just slept in a little house by the dock where they docked the boat, always fiddling with a lobster trap or studying the weather reports when Spencer walked down the dock and jumped on the boat.

“early as always” Rook slurred, not taking his eyes off the monitor.

“I thought we established that you liked that kind of thing” Spencer slurred back, stacking the fixed traps on the back of the boat.

“I do, but one day that enthusiasm will kill you”

“trust me man, if the money weren’t good, I wouldn’t be so enthusiastic” Spencer replied, standing up to put his gloves on and give a cordial wave to Trip as he jumped on the boat, only a few minutes later than Spencer.

“Hey Trip how`s it going?” Spencer asked, in the way he had been for the past four months. It seemed too sarcastic, too obnoxious to say “good morning”. There was an unspoken pact agreed upon by all the crew members to avoid the phrase in general.

Trip gave Spencer a hearty pat on the back, and leaned over to help him drag in rope.

“Feel good enough to make some money…shit it`s colder than a witchs’ teat today”

Spencer was proud that he taught Trip that phrase.

About fifteen minutes later, Margo appeared, quickly plodding towards the boat, hood up, her hands shoved in the pockets of her hoodie.

Ironically, she was the sunniest of the crew, typically buying something for the whole gang so they wouldn`t have to fish on empty stomachs. Today, it was a plastic netted bag of oranges.

“Thanks darlin’” Rook muttered, catching the orange as she tossed one to each of the crew.

A few more moments were spent organizing the tackle and throwing overall straps over shoulders, and then Rook gave the word to cast off.

The rhythm of work had become as automatic and unconscious as breathing to even Spencer. It went as followed. See bouy. Throw hook. Drag up trap. Empty trap into tank. Either stack the trap, or throw it back. Really the only person who had to actually think about their job was Rook, scanning the computer screen, and his paper maps, trying to find his traps and direct the crew which traps could wait, and which traps to pull in.

Due to the constant, straining mononteny, conversations between the crew would be running, and incoherent as they haul in their catch. Despite how this description sounds, they did not suffer at all under this strenuous labor. When each lobster dumped in the tank essentialy was another five bucks in each of the crew`s pockets, they had very little reason to complain. This kind of money, fishing easy waters, attracted drifters and shills, old hands and young hopefuls alike. The beauty of most of these fishing boats based off Costa Marco was that hiring and firing, well that was all at the captain`s discretion, weeding out all the lowlifes who didn`t meet the island`s “exacting” standards. The territorial government of the islands was almost non-existent, which led to virtually no enforcement of labor laws. Rightly so, because the fishermen of Costa Marco lived under a non-verbal, contractual agreement. To work hard, not to piss anyone off, and to enjoy life once in a while. If you were the wrong kind of personality, the wrong kind of person, hell even if the captain thought your fashion sense was abhorrent, all of these things were grounds for firing. The result? A tightly knit community of hand-picked fishing boats and their captains. Now it would be obvious to discover that most boats had some unfair preferences for their crews, locals picking locals, Hispanics picking Hispanics, black captains picking black crews, all of this was rampant and obvious, but nobody complained. It was more like a friendly competition, to see who, or what kind of person could really bring in the most cash. Which really befuddled Spencer, who finally decided Trip might not be offended if he asked Rook why he brought on Trip.

“Hey…Hey Rook?” Spencer asked, panting as he bent over to throw a trap in the water.

Rook looked up from his monitors quickly, obviously bored with his task as the weather seemed to be pretty much dead for the day

“What`s up Spence?”

“I`ve been working on this boat for a while now and…”

“Yeah?”

“I know how things are around here…Ah let me cut to the chase”

“Spit it out man” Rook asked, laughing a little at Spencer`s awkwardness.

“I`m just wondering why you brought on Trip…I mean, I know he`s a good fisherman and all, and a really nice guy, but…From what I see that isn`t what most people do around here”

Trip looked up from the back of the boat while spencer was asking his question, shrugging his shoulders and smiling, as if he couldn`t help just being an awesome guy, but his mood became serious when Spencer finished, his gaze turning to Rook.

Rook paused and stroked his salt and pepper beard, taking a quick glance at Margo, and then returning to his thoughts

“You said it yourself. Great fisherman, great guy. What else could I ask for?”

“Yeah Good point good point…” Spencer became nervous, as he now looked like a flaming racist.

“Oh don`t go shaking in your boots now Spence. I know you meant well” Trip piped up, grinning at Spencer, empathetic to his existential plight.

Spencer smiled nervously and shook his head, sighing as he bent back down to throw another trap.

Margo, largely oblivious to this whole exchange, staring off into the ocean, readied the last hook for the morning. Throwing it with impressive accuracy, a skill that was acquired over years of experience, and thankfully carried over to horseshoes. The effects of her habit were unpredictable at best. Sometimes she would be warm and sunny, optimistic and happy with the disposition of freshly poured chamomile tea. Other times, it was exactly as a hangover should be, a writhing, seething pain in her gut and a pounding in her head that always drove her to the point of swearing off the stuff for good, and made her despise every ray of sunlight or moment of attention thrown her way. Today however, was a great day. She had long figured out the exact formula for warding off these hangovers, that being exactly seven and a half hours of sleep, with two cups of coffee and half a lemon before leaving for work. That recipe always perked her right up as she made her own stroll down to the docks. It was that state of contentment, a lack of bereavement, that was almost better than getting high itself. In this kind of condition, she was really and truly just a fisherman on an exotic island.

As the crew halted work for the lunch break, huddling over the canvas covered interior of the boat as the midday sun bore down on them, Margo decided to make a tactical move. For almost a year and a half, she would always turn over a plastic bucket and sit between the two fiberglass benches that ran the length of the covered section of the boat. Rook would wheel around his chair in the cabin, opening the door to talk to the rest of the crew, Trip would sprawl himself out along the right bench, and Spencer would sit, with a hunched posture, nervously leaning against one of the polls holding up the canvas on the end of the left bench toward`s the captain`s cabin. In this fantastic mood she was in, she decided to sit directly next to Spencer. Within a far closer proximity than could be deemed permissible between coworkers or aquaintences. A single hand length, to be exact.

Spencer, munching away at a chicken wrap he had constructed himself, tried to play off the gravity of such a maneuver. Surely her bucket was no longer suitable for sitting, after all a rather rotten lobster did explode near the bottom. No amount of bleach could…

Never mind that tragedy! This wasn’t some kind of middle school panic attack he should be thrown into. Enough fanticising. Just…talk.

Thankfully, Rook broke the slow silent munching between the four of them.

“You know Spence, you were a little right about earlier”

“About what” He calmly,, yet nervously responded.

“About how it was unusual I took on Trip”

“Oh yeah?” Spencer calmly replied.

“You see… there is a story attached to his being here”

Trip rolled his eyes and scoffed, laying back on the bench in amusement.

“About oh I`d say coming on six years ago, I was just a lowlife truck driver, travelling the mainland for no other reason than sheer boredom.”

Spencer was relieved this appeared to be a happy story, as was indicated by Trip`s relaxed posture, and apparent annoyance for hearing this story-

“Close to a dozen times you`ve told this story old man” Trip piped up packing away his belongings, quickly trying to get back to work

“Oh ho ho not so fast there man, and that`s an order…I`m telling the story and you`re going to like it” Rook commanded, pointing one of his thick, calloused fingers at Trip.

Trip dramatically slumped his shoulders, and plopped back on the bench with a grin on his face, and his hands covering his cheeks.

“You see, one day down by Orlando, after hauling a whole bed full of toilet paper, I decided that I had had enough of that shit…”

There was a long pause, when nobody would appreciate his-

“Woooooooow” Margo said

“I know right?” Rook grinned, chuckled to himself a bit, and moved on.

“I just parked the truck by the beach, and took some time to weigh my options. After a long while of just watching the um…sunset…yeah the sunset”

“Huh” Margo sarcastically snorted, fully aware of his “admirations”

“As I was saying” Rook continued,

“All of the sudden, this crazy sonofabitch just runs a ground, right on the beach, out of nowhere, clinging to the steering wheel like Ahab”

Trip now began to nervously recoil, smiling and giving one or two laughs as the story continued

“Me being the only one there who wasn`t passed out, who actually knew what was going on there, I ran over to check out what was going on”

“Ran?” Trip asked with the foxy smile that dressed his sarcasm.

“Shut up asshole I`m telling the story. How about when you tell it you can say I flopped like a seal and dragged myself across the beach ok? Christ”

The crew now laughed in unison at Rook`s flustered anger, so much so that even he couldn`t keep a straight face.

Stopping himself to guffaw every now and then, he proceeded,

“So…heh, this guy is just like…completely out of it, absolutely dead tired, and I ask him, “Hey man are you okay?”, and heh heh, this guy just said, “I`m going to be a…Father!””

Spencer laughed the loudest, Margo only laughing because his was so infectious. She had heard this story a couple times before, but she didn`t want to seem too distant.

“I know! With the dramatic pause and everything!... Jesus Christ that was so damn funny, but let me tell you, I didn’t let him know that!”

Rook settled himself, and resumed in more technical terms, talking with his hands as he described the next part of the story.

“So Trip here was hungover something fierce, and judging by the bottle in his hand, he was trying to drink his way out of it. That didn`t really help his situation, because he was almost three feet on shore at that point, and nobody else seemed to give enough of a damn to help. At that point, only a few people had whipped out their phones to take pictures of it”

“You know I`m really disappointed that I don`t get to tell this story, because I`m sure someone must`ve called the cops” Trip added, partly shameful that he was drunk, alone, at sea, which is something every fisherman knows is incredibly dangerous.

“Well they only called the cops after I pulled the next stunt…so I got the idea to just unhitch my truck, and just… push him out to sea”

“No way!” spencer interjected, amazed that such a thing could even be accomplished. He remembered a time when the whole family was on leave, and the car his parents rented to go to the beach almost got stuck in the sand. Should`ve known better.

“Yes way, so I deflated my tires a bit, and after twenty minutes of that, I just drove out and over, and ever so slowly, pushed him out to sea. Now I had either neglected to tell him, or maybe he just forgot that I was going to do this, so he was just freaking out this whole time just screaming, “what are you doing you crazy white man!”

Rook had attempted to impersonate Trip`s accent in that last part, which got a good laugh out of the whole crew.

“So once I had got him free, I got a little thought in my head, and I just said “Hey, fuck it” and I jumped on the boat with him”

“That`s fuckin insane man” Spencer replied, noticing Margo almost hanging on his shoulder, the heat of her overworked body warming his right arm, just barely out of reach.

“Two days later, a few angry calls with the truck company and the bank, and here I am…you see that house on the end of the dock used to be Trip`s old dive, but I bought it for a pretty sum from him, and paid for most of the boat. And that my scrawny friend, is how a low down truck driver became the captain of a lobster boat. Fun story eh?”

Work continued as normally as it does on a Saturday in the sea. The only thing that changed really about the routine is that on this particular Saturday, Rook demanded that they all go bowling at the only lanes in town, which for reasons…disappointingly within comprehension, was called, “The Long Dock”.

Nobody in the crew actually had a car, because really, there wasn`t a need. Besides, the only thing you could buy on the island were old steel shipping containers with wheels, or whatever passed for drivable in the pool of old Chevrolets or Cadillac’s imported back in the 80s. Only a small, select few of wealthy CEO`s camped out on the far side of the island actually had new, even nice cars, but they rarely mixed with the gentiles of Tileo. Why would they? The cobblestone streets were so awfully maintained that you could lose a toddler in the gaps. For the Crew though, they wouldn`t have it any other way. People like Rook and Margo grew up hating rich guys and their million dollar carbon-coated palaces. The real fun of Tileo was just walking the streets, brushing up against the occasional sweaty islander, weaving and winding through the historical pathways and not so new infrastructure. It was an organic experience, which began to clash at the bowling alley.

You see, the only really well developed, actually paved road that ran through the outskirts of town, went by the alley. All of that roadwork and development had happened during the nickel mining boom back in the 80s, which “The Long Dock” truly reflected. Gaudy neon lighting, stale, pale concrete walls, and brushed steel and glass doors that looked like the rust was finally getting to them. In the parking lot, the dichotomy was clearly noticeable. On the right side of the doors, there were Maseratis, Porches, Mclarens, so on and so forth. On the left, were the old Ford trucks, the beamers, and even the occasional indian motorcycle.

The inside of the alley was equally divided, hell there were even separate counters on each side. Over the last five years or so, the rich guys and their heirs began to notice something about their collective of mansions and resorts they called Keith`s Bay. What a god awful name it had, and how tasteless all their neighbors were. Each one would try to one up the other, adding an infinity pool or a twelve story New England lighthouse. Between the upper-middle class tourists and sheltered trust fund kids, a few of the residents formed a small clique, the only clique that ever ducked out of town for more than twenty minutes to go into the jungle and “focus their chi” with the maid. These ten or twelve guys were a bunch of savvy internet millionaires, old coal mine owners, and fast food moguls that felt that because they went to the bowling alley twice a week, they were the “real islanders”, and the rest of the whiney losers that just hung out in town were inferior to them.

Of course the locals and others like the crew had some disdain for these guys. Not that they were rich, but that:

“They really just fuck with the way everyone is around here. I`ve been to that stupid fucking “Douche Bay” man. All it is, is a bunch of huge, white buildings…and I`m not a racist or anything Spence, but the whole place is just filled with Asians who don`t speak a lick of English”

“I think they`re Koreans man” Spence added, trying to break up Trip`s angry monologue with some analysis as they picked out their balls.

Spence always chose a purple ball. He didn`t know why. He didn’t care. It`s just a habit like any other. But for some reason, he felt pissed that the guys from Douche Bay had monopolized the rack that the balls were on. No matter. He`d just use an orange ball. Fuckers.

“What difference does it make? Asians are Asians man” Trip continued, waiting for his turn, as Rook, as a rule, always went first.

“Hey man, you`re telling me you`re not racist, but that`s kinda racist to say. What would you think if I said hey, “Blacks are Blacks”. It just completely disregards the individual differences between the different groups, and believe me, they make the distinction” Spencer argued.

“Well at least I look different than a guy from the Bronx or a guy straight out of Darfur. They all look like they`re all coming out of the same iphone factory” Trip grunted, tossing his first ball.

“Shit…a seven ten split” he muttered

Rook and Margo laughed a little, and Spencer lightened up.

“I don`t think the bowling gods appreciated that comment” Spencer said, waiting for Trip to attempt a spare.

“Well whatever the fuck I think about Asians, the fact of the matter is that they`re being treated like slaves. They all live in these shitty condos and its like, fuck, why don`t they just build a bunkhouse and chain`em to the floor at night. They can`t leave, they all eat at the one Chinese-“

“Korean” Margo jokingly interrupted

“Fuck you Mo” Trip scoffed in an embaressed, high pitched laugh

Rook chimed in, grabbing the sides of his eyes to squint them, “Don`t you mean Fook yuu?”

Margo and Spencer mimmiked the captain, prancing around Trip, squinting their eyes and professing their love for ramen noodles. Trip`s unwarranted distrust of Asians was often the subject of teasing.

After three games of heated competition between the four, Rook emerged as the winner, by only three points over Trip.

“A truly worthy opponent...well now my wrist`s sore. Who wants a drink?” Rook bellowed.

“Not me man, it`s already midnight, I`ve gotta get home” Trip trailed off, laying his ball back on the rack

Chapter Two: Sour Shots

The greatest part about the jungles of Costa Marco was that nobody seemed to be there. At least, that was the best part to Greg. Propped up against a tree stump, balancing a tin of coffee on a rock next to the humble cooking fire, he took stock of his provisions, seeing just how long he could stay in the mountains.

“Another week maybe. So long as I don`t mind eating rice and tuna for the last few days” he muttered to himself, hoisting himself up and sliding on his poncho

It had been several months since he kicked Liz out. Or at least, that`s how everyone seemed to take stock of it. What Sam or the coven of witches Liz called friends thought about him didn’t matter He cared more about how many pairs of dry socks he had in his bag.

“It`s a midlife crisis” they`d say.

“He was always kind of an asshole”

“You deserved better anyway”

After it all went down, he was barraged with calls from her friends, who either berated him, or acted as mediators for negotiations. That was how he got the money to take some time off. Climbing around the tight path of a mountain trail, he began to rant, as he always would when he was positive he was alone. The trees and the snakes were the only ones who seemed to listen anyway.

“She sold the fucking café…bet it was for a vacation with a little peurto rican guy” he grunted, hoping over a log

“At least she gave me half. Fucking half…goddamn I hate her. Every opportunity she got to tell me to fuck myself, she took it. Then she pisses and moans about being lonely…ha…never was a problem before I met you…”

This kind of therapy could go either way for Greg at this point. He would either put a machete through a tree, or he`d end up laying on a rock, calmly listening to the rustling of wild boars in the bushes.

He had the money to do these kind of things now. Early retirement was treating him well. But overall, he wasn`t satisfied.

At least, not until he put together the perfect storm of simplistic material satisfaction.

“Ok Greg…just like the little seniorita in Kipp`s Cove taught you”

He had stopped at the peak of the lush mountain cliff, sluffing off his pack and setting Tequila`s little wooden cage to the side, under the shade of a leafy bush. Pulling a couple of limes and a tin cup out of his pockets, he began to ruminate on his recent bar-hopping adventures. Greg was a real people person, a man of culture. It was also his personal belief, that the best way to understand a people and their ways was to drink what they drank, the way they drank it.

“And the Venezuelans are bitter socialists” he said, as he spat out the strange concoction he conducted from memory

Watching the acrid liquid drip down the rock as the afternoon sun braized his skin suddenly gave him a bout of existential dread. This wasn’t the life he wanted to live. This wasn`t anywhere near where he wanted to be at his age. Farting around on a tropical island with a lizard, divorced, unemployed, pickling himself with every latin beverage under the sun.

“Christ…Pete`s a goddamned English professor. Josh has what- seven kids?” he muttered to himself, taking stock of the accomplisments of his old college friends.

“And I mean, Fred smoked so much weed we thought he`d lose a chromosome. Now he`s making six figures with a tire company”.

Greg`s morose self pity turned to anger, and then to a calm, quite acceptance. There was a reason he went on these hikes. To disconnect himself from that kind of anxiety and appreciate his surroundings, slowly mellowing his mood with a neat burbon and Cuban cigar, allowing the breeze to massage his lurid eyes.

“Regardless…there needs to be a change” he said, swaying the bottle over to Tequila`s bowl, giving him a few more drops.

“Nothing major. The last thing I need is to go back to the states. They`d probably institutionalize me the second I got off the plane”

Greg chuckled to himself, feeling the handle of his machete gouging into his side as he took another swig.

“I need a simple job. A simple job, that makes me feel fulfilled *swig* as a man”

By this time, the horizon was dark with storm clouds and an evening sunset coming on, creating a molasses enamel on all the rocks on the shore. In the distance, Greg could see the ships coming in, bobbing gently on the calm ocean glass. Soon, fantasies of being out on the open ocean fishing the ocean`s bounty danced across his addled brain.

“what a wonderful profession. Where being a drunk shrew is actually a virtue”

Or so he thought

That night, a storm did indeed roll over the island. It was fierce, for sure, but not fierce enough to stop the festivities from continuing inside one of the many lively dive bars. There were even a few fishermen playing a rather extreme drinking game. If you flinched at a lightening strike, you drank. As you could probably guess, Spencer wasn`t doing too well.

“Look at him, still shaking like a leaf even three shots in!” Trip scolded

It was true. Spencer was in fact, visibly nervous. Not neccesarily because the thunder and lightening were beginning to sear the masts of every boat in the harbor, but because the alcohol was beginning to convince him that now was the time confront Margo about his feelings. Rook, sporting an even longer salt and pepper beard, could see from the head of the table at the back of the sour smelling shack that the kid was going to make a big mistake. And, maybe, a small part of him was feeling territorial.

Placing his big paw of a left hand on spencer`s chest, he saved him

“ Boy, stay down. Look at these hands” he gargled, slamming a beer down in his right hand

At that moment, a flash and rumble, but not a single quiver from those beastly mitts.

Spencer was forced to try and get ahold of the reigns of his depth perception. Standing felt like something he was disinterested, the sullen and aged booth he sat at becoming fuzzy to the touch. Suddenly the seven or maybe only five shots he had downed had caught up to him all at once, and he wasn`t going to have any more, or else risk an incident like last month where Trip had ruined strawberries for him forever.

Margo was far more sober, but certaintly not by choice. Nobody else had noticed but she had only finished half of her glass of light beer from the tap that may as well have been creek water given its quality and the horrifically poorly washed glass it came in. Her interests were growing more and more desperate with every joke or story she had to smirk and gesticulate her way through. The only thing keeping her from picking up her chair and using it to fight her way through the packed cigar box of a dive bar she was crammed in to get home and get her shit was the face that the storm outside could put a two by four through her chest at any minute. Death might be preferable to having to pan across the bar one more time to see the well exposed crack of Captain Stug`s ass trying to escape his cargo shorts at the bar. Stug was too old of a salt for anyone that wasn`t the bartender to tell him what to do, so on his ass marched outward as stug got more and more drunk. Christ. It was like watching a seal clubbing on national geographic. Could’ve been hilarious if it wasn’t so hard to watch.

“10 bucks I get this quarter in there” Rook said, holding the silver coin between his calloused index finger and thumb. Margo noticed that the whole table had been staring like she did. Spencer saw that others in the room were either giving Stug a wide berth, or sizing up their own marksmanship competitions.

Looking to find some immature joy, Margo joined in.

“I`ll fucking take that. You haven`t thrown a hook since I came on, doubt you could hit an ass crack at twenty paces” Margo joked. The others would have laughed if they weren`t all pushed to their respective limits. Margo and Rook slammed down what their bleary eyes perceived to be ten dollars a piece on the stained wood table, then Rook sized up his target. In one majestic, fluid motion the quarter left his hand, flying straight and true over the bar counter, tapping between bottles of whatever the hell Cesar could stack behind him.

“gat..damnint” Rook grumbled, shuffling back into his seat as Margo swabbed her hand across the table, scooping up the crumpled dollars. She didn`t care. She needed to go home.

The taste in her mouth was like she`d threw up a flower shop. She hated it she hated it she hated it. The heat and the sweat and the air and the smell the smell the smell. Too many people too many things, eyes, sandels, fucking stray cats every fucking five fucking feet in this tiny fucking block on this tiny fucking island. Home. She needed to get home.

Margo suddenly, abandoning any kind of formal convention, stood up and walked out of the bar, the wind and rain whipping momentarily like a jack in the box as she opened and closed the door behind her. Spencer was too out of it to do anything, but others were slightly alarmed. A few, tired of waiting, tried to follow her out but were blown back by healthy gusts of wind. Spencer was worried. And he wondered why she would leave like that.

“Should we call the cops? No way she makes it out there!” he yelled to Trip and Rook

“Cops are busy enough, wouldn`t risk it. Woman`s always been skittish. Her house ain`t far so I wouldn`t worry too much. Either of you wanna hear about the time I got held up by a biker gang?” Rook largely brushed off Spencer`s distress, motioning to a waitress for more whatever would occupy his time. This grew into what could only be a fruitless and flirtatious conversation.

Spencer turned to Trip for some sympathy.

“ Are you just going to sit back and let this happen?”

“ If anything man she`s got the right idea. I`ve gotta go check on my family at some point tonight. The whipping I`ll get if I`m not back by midnight oof” Trip joked.

No one was taking him seriously, which would have made Spencer feel uneasy if he were more sober, but like any young guy with a background like his, he was curious.

“well I`m going” Spencer said, gathering his wallet and finishing his drink. He put up his hood on his rubber coat, bracing himself for his excursion. Before he left, Trip followed behind him with his own boat issued rubber coat, and the two of them turned to give a gruff but well understood farewell to Rook, who was far more comfortable wading out the whole storm and then some in the back of that bar.

“I think you`re crazy boy” Trip said to Spencer.

“But good luck anyway. I`ll see you whenever Rook says its safe to work again” Trip said, putting his hand on Spencer`s shoulder, then opening the door, fighting the wind walking towards his home on the shore.

Spencer couldn`t believe it, but the wind felt rather calm as he walked towards margo`s home. It was almost as if all the old geezers and shop owners were just trying to find an excuse to drink, or at least jumped on a better excuse than most. As he crossed the street past the more tourist focused bar with its stained colonial white walls, a gust of wind picked him up off his feet and tossed him on the cobblestone street, with every attempt to fight the gust and stand up just resulting in him being rolled another five feet down the street. This dance lasted for what felt like an eternity, until he crawled behind an old chocolate shop to get out of the wind.

“Sweet jesus…how the hell did Margo do in this?”

Clinging hand over hand to the railings on the storefronts, Margo finally reached the trail that led to her home. All that it took was a run over a fairly wide patch of open ground to the start of the trail. Her mind wandered to the swaying of the trees in the violent wind, how small she felt as she watched a hundred trees move like dogs on a beach playing with a ball. Digging in her heels and thinking only of the sweet relief behind a mere hundred or so yards of woods. Thinking only of relief, of calm, of the comfort that awaited her so close in the present, her body moved like she was all tendon. Her desperation drove her arms and legs to precisely and intensely grip the trees and earth, when she stumbled, to nearly fling herself towards her front door. Her body slammed against the wood door like it was a queen sized bed with silk sheets. Before she could process anything else she was inside, and feet guiding her unconsciously to the drawer she kept her stash. Clean clean finally clean. Cold and clear and free free from fat hairy yellow toothed bastards.

Sweet Christ. How did she ever go any longer than a day without this?

Spencer wasn`t sure if she had made it home. The wind was getting worse and worse and there was no way

#my writing

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lily-the-skele · 7 years ago

Text

First Date Pt. 4

And the final part of @underopenskies and my rp

[pt 1] [pt 2] [pt 3]

“Havin’ siblings can be a both a blessin’ an’ a curse. It all depends on th’ moment. My brothers have always got my back, n’ I’ve always got theirs- but, for as much as we’ve romped and played, we’ve also had our fair share o’ fights.”

“Are ya kiddin’ me? O’ course m’ excited! I’ve wanted t’ be a mom for a long time now. M’ thirty two- I ain’t getting any younger. M’ actually older than my Ma was when she had me.” The cowgirl tucks the completed sandwiches onto serving plates with practiced ease, sorting them by jelly type as they went.

“An’ yeah- th’ daddy’s a nice fella named Hamish Parker. He’s actually out with Greg right now- tha’s my other brother, by the way. Adam ain’t fond o’ Hamish right now, so ‘s best not t’ have them around each other. Anyways- Hamish ‘s a sweet man- older than me, n’ he owns his own ranch up yonder.”

She lays out a few more finished jelly slices on their respective plates, and slides them closer for Lily to put her peanut butter bread onto. “Adam’s a pretty traditional man for bein’ as young as he is.” She hums softly. “He’d make a good dad though. He’s a lot like our Da was- though Adam’s temper ‘s a bit more hair trigger.”

There was a thump upstairs, and Skylar snorted. Muffled voices drifted down to them. “Sounds like Adam wandered up t’ see what Tommy was up to while we were in th’ kitchen.”

Lily beamed as she listened to Skyler talk as she finished another slice. “Heheh yeah, I think it’s siblings’ job to fight. Still it would have been nice to have someone to share things with. Gigi was actually older than you when she found me. Plus she was all alone but she somehow managed to raise me well.”

Lily tilted her head and glanced up at Skyler with a puzzled look. “Oh, why doesn’t Adam like Hamish? It sounds like you two are happy together.” She chewed on her thumb, a worried expression on her face. she hoped she’d never have to see Adam when someone set off his temper. Angry people generally made her nervous. She jumped at the thump and she glanced up at the ceiling. “I hope no one got hurt.”

“Pretty much. Ma was forty two when she had the triplets, n’ tha’ was rough on her body. I want t’ have lots o’ kids- I jus’ didn’t get th’ chance t’ start lookin’ for a man early, ‘cause i had t’ help Ma with my brothers.”

“Ahhh, Adam’s pretty traditional for his age. And he’s protective- I might be twelve years older, n’ he might be th’ baby o’ th’ family, but he tends t’ get an older brother mentality about him sometimes, n’ it makes him a bit short tempered when it comes t’ us. And… well, m’ pregnant, th’ baby was an accident, n’ I ain’t known Hamish for very long. So Adam was kinda… Okay, very, very upset on my behalf. Hamish’s a good fella though- very excited t’ be a daddy. Adam’s just gotta get over himself- he’s excited t’ be an Uncle, he’s just… old school, for such a young fella.” She hums and gives her a thoughtful look. “And nah- the boys ain’t gonna hurt each other. Thomas ‘s squirly- he’s hard t’ pin down, if they’re rough housin’ up there.”

Lily had a small frown on her face as she took in this information. “You would think he would be happy that Hamish is taking responsibility instead of running off.” She let out a small huff, but her smile returned. “Well, I’m happy for you Miss Skyler. Maybe I can get Adam to lighten up a touch.” She chuckled. “At least he hasn’t lost his playfulness.” She finished off a couple of more sandwiches.

“I think he’s more worried about Hamish runnin’ off when I’m eight months along.” Skylar shrugs. “I don’t think Haz is th’ type, t’ be honest. He’s real excited.” “That’d be a real miracle if ya could, sugar.” She chuckles gently, listening to the sounds of her brothers roughhousing on the stairs. They were making their way back down to join them- so she just hoped they behaved once they got into the kitchen. “Adam’s probably the tightest wound twenty year old I’ve ever met- but yeah, he ain’t lost that playful side. We ruffle his feathers often enough t’ ensure he keeps it.”

Lily giggled and gave Skyler a playful wink. “Just you wait, I’ll use my my feminine charms on him and he’ll be putty in my hands.”

She glanced towards the stairs. “Let’s hope they don’t end up falling down the stairs from all their rough housing.” She blinked and turned back to Skylar, eye sockets widening slightly. “I’m two years older than him?” She couldn’t believe it.

“I have no doubt.” Skylar winked back. “Ya technically older than all three o’ my little brothers, sweetheart. An’ don’t worry- if they fall down, ‘s not the first time they’ve done it.” She finished up with the jelly, and slid the plates over to her, before resting her chin on her palm with a curious hum. “S’ not a bad thing t’ be older than y’ boyfriend, or the same in reverse. Hamish is older than me by quite a lot.”

And if he gets hurt, that just means I can make him feel better, Lily thought with a grin. She chuckled sheepishly as she finished up the rest of the sandwiches. “I kinda assumed he was older.” She gave Skylar a curious look before hesitantly asking, “How old is Hamish?”

“Adam tends t’ act like he’s older- it surprises a lot o’ folks t’ find out how young he is. Surprises a lot o’ folks t’ find out he’s actually th’ youngest, actually.” “Hamish is forty seven years old.” And she was thirty two- so there was a bit of an age gap. Well- alright, a little bit more than just a little bit.

“Yeah, people tend to think I’m younger than I really am. Some people even thought Gigi was my grandma. Hoo boy did they get an earful.” Lily chuckled. “Oh wowie, that is quite an age gap. Well as long as you two are happy and love each other, who cares about age?”

“Someone did that t’ my Ma’ once. Thought tha’ my brothers were my sons, and that they were her grandkids- Ohhh boy, she was steamin’ like a tea-kettle.”

“Fifteen years ‘s a bit o’ an age gap.” She agrees. “But we’re happy, n’ we love each other.”

“I smell peanut butter!” The short cowboy strutting into the kitchen was practically tiny compared to the rest of the skeletons Lily had seen today. He looked a lot like Vera, and lacked horns like his two other siblings had. His legs were well muscles, but he seemed petite and fragile compared to Skylar or Adam. He nudged his glasses up the bridge of his nose, and scooted over to the kitchen sink to wash his hands. “Hi!” He greeted Lily. “I’m Thomas! Ya can call me Tommy though. Adam told me you’re dating now? Golly- ya really are pretty jus’ like he said you are, ain’t ya?”

“Oh sure, blab about everythin’ I tell ya.”

“Well,” Vera chimed in as she squeezed in past Adam, “It’s not like he’s lyin’, is he? Ya lil’ girlfriend ‘s a real cute one.”

Lily giggled and smiled at Skylar. “If Gigi and Ms Vera became friends they would be a force to be reckoned with.”

She glanced over at Thomas and replied, “Yep, we made a whole bunch of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. I think we made enough to feed a whole army!”

She let out a nervous laugh. “O-oh gosh, th-thank you. It’s nice to meet you Tommy.” She squeaked, her skull turning a bright pink and she hid her face in her hands. “Stooop you’re making me blush!” She wasn’t used to getting so many compliments at once. Though she was secretly happy that Adam was bragging about her to his brother.

“Maybe not a whole army since Adam’s here. He’s gonna probably eat half o’ those on his own. An’ Lily? Ya got a cute blush too. Adam sure wasn’t lyin’.”

“Ain’t my fault m’ a large man.”

“Got a lot o’ space t’ fill,” Vera said with a grin.

The McQuillins file around the kitchen table, taking seats, and waiting as Skylar urged Lily’s blushing little self to join them. Adam left a seat open next to him for Lily to sit next to him.

“A’right- lets get sandwiches for everyone.” Plates were passed around the table, before Skylar brought over the platters of various sandwiches, resting them on the table for everyone to choose from.

Lily just let out unintelligible squeaks as her skull continued to grow and even brighter shade of pink. Finally she managed to squeak out, “O-okay enough about me let’s eat!”

She took Skylar’s hand as she helped her off the stool and she sat down next to Adam. She ran into an obstacle when she realized she was too small to properly see over the table. Her skull growing hot she stuttered, “U-um I think I m-may have a problem…”

Skylar noticed Lily’s problem first, and the tall skeleton chuckled faintly. “Bein’ short happens, sugar. I’ll go getcha a pillow.” Or two, Skylar mused internally. A quick jaunt into the living room procured two pillows, which would boost Lily up higher in her seat. She shifts and bumps her hip to Adam’s chair. “Lift, Adam.”

“A’right.” He turned in his seat, and eased one of his hands under her knees. The other tucked behind her back. She wasn’t all that heavy to lift, and he eased her up, and held her there while Skylar got the pillows tucked under her, and then set her back down.

“Well, I can see ya over top th’ table now, sweetheart.”

“Th-thank you,” Lily murmured, still blushing a bright pink. She watched as Skylar fetched two pillows and she was about to move when she suddenly found herself being lifted by Adam. She let out an embarrassed squeak and she clung onto her boyfriend as Skylar placed the pillows down on the chair. She just nodded at Vera’s words once she was set back down, gaze fixated on the table. “Mmhm.”

“Oh my goodness, ya blush so adorably. Adam was right- ya are real adorable.”

“She is.” Skylar agrees as she takes her seat. She crosses her ankles lightly under the table, and reaches out to take a sandwich. “A’right, ya’ll. Dig in~ These sandwiches were made for food, not for lookin’. M’ Thomas? Stop flusterin’ Adam’s girl.”

“A’right, a’right. My appologies, Miss Lily.” The eldest of the boys chuckled slightly, and reached out for one of the apricot jelly sandwiches, eager to tuck into his meal. Likewise, Adam and Vera were also reaching out for theirs- and the plates were well within reach of Lily too.

Lily was beginning to feel overwhelmed but let out a sigh of relief when Skylar called Thomas off. Any more and she felt like she would have fainted from all the magic rushing to her skull. “I-it’s quite alright, Tommy.” She gave him a shy smile.

She reached out and grabbed one of the strawberry jam sandwiches and began to eat it, making small happy noises. She ended up getting some of the jam on her cheeks though.

“If ya say so, sweetheart.”

Adam spotted the jam on Lily’s cheeks, and reached out with his napkin to dabble it away for her, before tucking into his own sandwich. He’d chosen grape jelly.

“That’s cute~” Skylar cooed, nibbling at her own sandwich.

“Shush Sky,” Adam chided her.

Lily let out a squeak and giggled when Adam wiped her cheek with a napkin. “Thanks, Adam. I’m glad I have you taking care of me.” She swung her legs as she took another bite of her sandwich. She giggled again at the exchange between Skylar and Adam.

“I’ll try t’ do my best t’ take care o’ ya, sweetheart.” Despite having sharp teeth, it wasn’t all that messy for him to munch through the sandwich. He was relatively mess free as he finished his first, and started on his second.

“So, Ma mentioned that ya do commissioned plush toys, Lily?” Skylar hummed softly around her sandwich.

Lily grinned at Adam as she finished her sandwich. She would have to ask him in private how he felt about being called daddy. Maybe she should wait until later in their relationship. She didn’t want to jump the gun just yet. Her thoughts were suddenly interrupted by Skylar.

“Why yes, I do! I’m mostly self taught, but Gigi showed me the basics. I have a lot of fun doing it. Right now it’s just a hobby but I’m thinking I can make it my full time job. I even have a couple of regular customers, but there’s one that buys from me the most. In fact he constantly tells me to raise my prices.”

“Well, if ya good at it, an’ ya enjoy doin’ it, then there’s no reason not t’ make it your full time job.” She nods. “Heh. I actually wouldn’t mind commissioning a couple toys for th’ baby once we learn if we’re havin’ a boy or a girl. What sort o’ stuff do ya make? Like… stuffed bears, or…?” She seemed genuinely interested- she’d rather get something handmade than buy something store bought.

Lily perked up, nearly jumping up in her chair. “Oh, it depends entirely on what you want! I’ve had people ask for cartoon characters. But I won’t do anything lewd.” She shook her skull with a pout. “You wouldn’t believe what kind of perverted things people have asked for. Honestly, what kind of skeleton do people take me for? ”

“A-anyway, I’ll give you a special discount! You gotta save your money for your little baby bones. We can discuss the details later?” Lily beamed at Skylar, excitement bubbling in her soul. “I can give you my email.”

“I wouldn’t want anythin’ done lewd anyways, sugar. S’ gonna be done for m’ baby, not for me. An’ sweethearts, folks are only mortal- they’ve been makin’ dicks out o’ stuff since they first learned how t’ draw on things.” She laughs gently.

“That bein’ said, i respect tha’ ya don’t wanna do lewd things. Nothin’ wrong with it. N’ yeah- i’ll give ya my email too, n’ we can chat. But noo, ya ain’t givin’ me a discount, not since this ‘s bein’ handmade.” if she just charged discount rates anyways, Skylar would just pay a little more over as a ‘tip’ for the good work. Because she was wily, and she worked her way around rules.

Lily stammered out, “I-I know that, and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have those sort of… thoughts too but… But why do they have to come to me for that kind of stuff? I-it’s so embarrassing.”

Lily huffed softly. “No, I insist!” There was a look of determination on her face that seemed to say there was no use arguing with the petite skeleton. “I love what I do, so it doesn’t even feel like a job. I look forward to hearing what you want.” She suddenly turned to Adam and added, “And Adam, you have to tell me when your birthday is!”

“Those sort of thoughts, huh?”

“Havin’ those sorts o’ thoughts ‘s perfectly normal an’ part o’ bein an’ adult.” She hums. “As for why they come t’ you… i dunno, sweetheart.”

“You n’ i are gonna go toe t’ toe on th’ prices, aren’t we?” She laughs goodnaturedly. There might be no arguing with the small skeleton, but there were ways around arguing. “Ya can’t say no if i tip ya real good for a job well done, can ya?” She grins. “Either way, sweetheart, what i want probably ain’t gonna be too big o’ a job. I’ll talk t’ Hamish n’ let ya know what we decide.”

“Whatcha need m’ birthday for, Lily?” He arches a brow curiously. “S’ October the twentieth, though.”

Lily blushed and she squeaked out, “O-oh shush and eat your sandwiches, both of you!” She stuck her tongue out at Thomas and Adam before turning back to Skylar. “Yep!” She had a small look of triumph on her face. At the mention of a tip she let out a good natured huff and replied, “No, I guess I can’t.” She gave the other woman a smile and nodded. “Alrighty.”

She giggled at Adam before bringing a finger up to her mouth. “That’s a secret!”

The boys chuckled and did as ordered, resuming their meals with gusto.

“M’ pretty good at findin’ my way around rules sometimes, sweetheart.” She gives her a soft laugh, and then chuckles.

Adam playfully sticks his tongue out at her once he’s swallowed and cleared his mouth. “Fine- ya keep ya secrets then, sweetheart. I suppose i’ll see m’ when i see m’, yeah?”

Lily gave Skylar a warm smile before sticking out her tongue back at Adam. “Hehehe you most certainly will.”

She finished off two more sandwiches before she deemed herself full. “Heheh those were some yummy sandwiches.” She had tried out the some of the different types of jellies as well as the strawberry. She tugged on Adam’s sleeve and said, “Hey Adam, why don’t you show me your room?” She smiled innocently at him.

“They were very good sandwiches.” Skylar chuckles. She’d finished a little while ago. There were lots of leftover sandwiches too, so Greg and Hamish would have plenty when they got back in. She stood up and collected the plates, intending to do the dishes.

“Here, lemme help, Sis.” Like a good younger brother, Thomas stood and helped his older sister collect the plates- which left Adam free to entertain his guest.

Vera settled back, content to watch her kids do the dishes while she rolled her joints and flexed her fingers, trying to work some of the aches out.

“Oh! Ah, sure.” He stood from his chair easily, and carefully helped Lily down off of the pile of pillows they’d boosted her up onto. Once she was on her own two feet, he offered her his hand. “S’ on th’ third floor. Ya alright t’ walk up all o’ th’ stairs?”

Lily held onto Adam as he helped her down. She smiled up at him and took his offered hand before replying, “I think I’ll be fine!” She turned to the others and chirped, “Thanks again for the food. We’ll be back soon so don’t miss us too much.” She gave a small giggle and turned back to Adam. “Lead the way.”

The rest of the family waved them off with a smile, and left Adam to guide her up the stairs.

“A’right.” Adam kept a firm hold on her hand, though his grip was forever gentle, and guided her for the spiral stairs that went up- and up, and up, and up. There was little wonder why everyone in the family had legs as toned as they did- and rear ends as well. They’d been walking these stairs their whole lives. “You’ll love th’ view, sweetheart.” Adam hummed. “Ya can see for miles from m’ window.”

“O-oh wowie I wasn’t expecting a spiral staircase!” Lily exclaimed as she hopped up the steps. It didn’t appear as if she was at risk of running out of steam. She gave Adam a grin before replying, “I can’t wait to see!” To be honest, she wouldn’t be paying much attention to the view since she had every intention of kissing Adam some more. She giggled softly and blushed a soft pink.

“Mhm. My Da’ and his best friend designed the house, and built if for my Ma. Da ain’t around anymore, but Doc’ Tene still is. He’s a family friend- an’ he’s also the family vet. He’s a good guy.”

At the top of the stairs, Adam takes a moment to orient himself, and then guides her down the long hall. There’s a lot of empty rooms- testament to the size of the family that Vera had expected to have, but never got the chance. Adam takes her to one at the end, and opens the door for her, and lets her in.

His room is sparsely decorated, but has a massive bed covered in dark blue sheets. His closet is full of flannel shirts, and he has a dresser full of folded jeans. He’s got a window, and a small walk out balcony next to it with glass doors.

“Well, this is my room.” He smiles faintly.

Lily looked up at Adam with an expression of awe. “Wowie, they didn’t build it all on their own did they? That would be amazing. I’d like to meet this Dr. Tene. Being a vet must be a neat job.” She had a little skip to her step as they walked down the hall, only pausing to glance at the empty rooms. It seemed a little sad.

Once they reached Adam’s room, Lily took a look around, feeling a brief flash of disappointment at its sparsity. However, it was quickly overshadowed when she spotted the giant bed. Giving a squeak of excitement she took a running jump, just barely making it and began to bounce on the mattress, giggling.

“They did, actually.” He chuckles softly. “Doc Tene is a nice fella. ‘S a neat job- but a gross one for sure. He handles all sorts o’ stuff that’s jus’ quite nasty. But, someone’s gotta do it- n’ he’s actually really good at what he does.”

He laughed as she took a running start for the bed, and simply followed her. He took a seat on the edge while she bounced around, and lightly rubbed his hands on his knees. “Sorry m’ room’s a lil’ empty. I don’t spend much time in here because o’ work though, so, y’know…” The only thing personal in here was the box under his bed, and that was his collection of… personal lubricants.

Lily stopped bouncing on the bed and settled down next to Adam. “You don’t have to apologize, it’s still a nice bedroom.” She giggled. “Besides, your bed is fun to bounce on and it’s really comfy.” She gave him a warm smile and nuzzled against his arm.

“Thank you.” He leaned down and pressed a kiss to the top of her head. The bone of his heel clicked lightly against the floor, and he shifted with a mischievous grin, before scooping her to his chest. Adam flopped back against the bed, leaving her sprawled out on top of him in his shirt as he lay under her. “Y’know, sweetheart, you’re real cute in m’ shirt. Would ya like t’ keep tha’ one?”

Lily let out a squeak as their positions suddenly changed and she found herself lying on Adam’s chest. Her skull was a bright pink as she stared down at her boyfriend. “Ah– c-can I really?” She squirmed a little. “O-okay. It is a comfy shirt.” She gave him a shy smile before leaning in to kiss him.

Adam’s hands settled gently on her hips, and he rubbed his thumbs lightly into her lower back through his shirt. He gave her a grin as she squirmed on top of him. “I don’ mind at all ‘f ya wear my shirts, sweetheart. I’d say ya could wear my pants, but I don’ think you’d fit.” Maybe in one leg, but not in the whole thing. He leaned up to meet her kiss, mouth working gently against hers as she flushed a brilliant pink.

Lily squirmed more at his touch and she gave a small giggle. “Don’t be silly, Adam.” She clung to the front of his shirt, letting out small squeaks and shivers as they kissed. She leaned into the kiss, wanting a little more. Her blush grew deeper and she could feel her face getting warm. She gave his lips a shy lick and she gripped at his shirt more tightly.

The flick of her tongue against his mouth prompted him to carefully part his lips, his tongue flicking out to gently slide against her own. His tongue brushed over his teeth, the sharp edges making him shiver, and he slid a hand along her lower back. The other slid up, cupping her shoulders, and his ribs rumbled under her like a pleased freight engine.

Lily’s tongue brushed up against Adam’s, a little more emboldened know that she was more familiar with this type of kissing. Her grip on his shirt tightened as they deepened the kiss and she pressed up against him. She gave a small giggle as she felt the rumble of Adam’s chest against her.

Adam’s blush darkened a little bit as she pressed closer to him, and he rumbled again, pleased as his tongue worked gently against hers. He lured her gently into his mouth, careful to part his teeth so she didn’t prick herself on them, and lightly teased her tongue with his lips as his mouth worked against her own. Adam’s hands splayed gently on her back, and he stroked his thumbs along the curve of her lower back and along the small band of her shoulders.

Lily whimpered into Adam’s mouth, the kiss beginning to get slightly overwhelming. She pulled back just enough to catch her breath, panting softly. “W-wowie this is getting i-intense.” She was starting to feel a little hot under the collar, not to mention another place. “W-we should probably take a break before we…” she felt herself leaning back in but stopped herself, “…we get carried away.”

“Mmmm,” he rumbled pleasantly, “I suppose ya right with that.” He was starting to feel stirrings from earlier again, and it wasn’t helping that they were sprawled on his bed. He took a moment to close his eyes, and he lifted a hand to scrub it down his face briefly. When it lifted away, he was much more composed- at least up top. At least she was short- she wouldn’t feel what he had started in his pants.

“‘S pretty easy t’ get lost in kissin’ ya, sweetheart. Just as easy as it is t’ get lost in ya eyes, as a matter o’ fact.” He leaned up- not to kiss her- but to just nuzzle his nasal ridge to hers with a gentle, affectionate motion.

Lily didn’t want to get up just yet and she rested against his chest. She gave a small giggle as she watched Adam get his composure back. “O-oh my, you’re making me blush!” she replied with a bashful smile. She returned the nuzzle then kissed him on the nose ridge. “I never knew kissing could be so much fun to be honest.”

“Kissin’s a lot o’ fun when done with th’ right person.” He laughed gently, smiling at the kiss to his nasal ridge. He didn’t even mind her sprawling out on his chest- she wasn’t that heavy, so it was a nice, comfortable position for him to enjoy, and for her to as well no doubt. “N’ you’re real cute when ya blush, Lily.”

Lily let out a giggle. “Aww Adam, you’re so sweet to me. I think you’re cute when you blush too. It’s such a pretty shade of blue.” She poked his cheek playfully before adding, “You’re really comfy to lie on.” She gave his chest a soft pap. “I could probably take a nap like this.”

He stuck his tongue out at her playfully when she poked his cheek, and then leaned up to nuzzle her. “Why don’t ya take a nap? I don’ mind cuddlin’ ya for a while, n’ i wouldn’t mind takin’ one with ya. S’ real nice t’ jus’ hold ya n’ cuddle up with ya.”

Lily stuck her tongue back out at Adam and she let out a giggle when he nuzzled her. “Really, you wouldn’t mind?” She hummed in content as she nuzzled him back. “I think taking a nap with you would be really nice.” She placed her cheek against his chest right about where his soul would be. “Hmm you’re really warm.”

“I don’t mind at all, Lily.” He cuddled her close to him with a soft, pleased sound, another rumble crawling up his chest. It boomed in tune with his soul, though his soul’s beating was louder yet when the rumbling passed. “Heh- bein’ this big has it’s perks. M’ usually warm all th’ time.”

Lily let out a small shiver as she felt the rumble travel through her body and she gasped when she could hear the beat of his soul. She blushed as she nuzzled his chest and murmured, “Mmmn a nap does sound good right about now.” As she said this she could feel her eye sockets begin to droop. “Heheh so comfy.”

Adam’s sockets closed, and a content smile slid onto his face. He cuddled her close to his chest, soft pleased sounds leaving him. “Mhm. A nap sounds jus’ right~”

Lily let out a pleased hum before mumbling a soft, “G’night,” before her eye sockets shut all the way. Her breathing evened out as she fell asleep.

“G’night, sweetheart.” Adam was not far behind her.

the end

#rp #underopenskies #Adam #Lily #First Date

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