#ALSO IF IM CHANGING TENSES LETS IGNORE

[merchelsea]

Hi hi

Can I request a Oscar Piastri sister reader x Lando

Maybe she's older than Oscar by a year and dating Lando, I want it to be angst with fluffy ending cus im a sucker for those 😭 either the reader and lando gets into a fight and they take a break and Oscar ends up being the middle person with a happy ending

Or

Oscar didnt know his sister was dating Lando and she introduces Lando to her family as her bf and oscar's just hurt by how they didnt tell him in advance?? and he starts being petty and ignore them...but it also ends in a happy ending

Idk idk I'm good with any as long as it's angst fluff sorry this is long 😭😭 thank you as welllll <3

family matter — lando norris (+op81)

pairing: lando norris x fem!piastri!reader

summary: you introduced lando to your family, as your boyfriend, and your brother didn’t react as well as you hoped

autor’s note: you guys love a piastri sister x lando story. (well i love writing them so keep the requests coming!

word count: 2k

warnings: angst. sad oscar. swearing.

masterlist | requests

lando stood nervously on the passenger seat, while you drove to the restaurant. he didn’t need to say anything for you to realize how insanely nervous he was.

you told him tonight was the night you would let everyone know what he actually meant to you.

you had been dating for a month and some days, and not telling anyone was crazy, in your perspective. you knew everyone would support you, but you were still a little apprehensive. after all, lando was oscar’s teammate, and you didn’t want to make things at work difficult for neither of them.

it was a good opportunity today because your whole family agreed to go out for dinner after a good home race for oscar. lando got a podium, oscar got fourth place. it was good for the team and for both drivers.

even though there was some controversy.

once you told him, the british immediately panicked. your family loved him, and he was aware, but he couldn’t shake this uneasy feeling.

seeing him so tense, you decided it was better if you drove. you were not completely normal about this either, but you felt this was way easier for you.

as you got closer to the restaurant, you felt like you needed to, at least try to, calm him down.

“they already love you, lan. it’s not like us being together changes their opinion about you.” you looked over at him as you parked the car.

he simply nodded, kissing the back of your hand after holding on to it for a while. you stood in the car a little more.

“you’re right. let’s go.” he finally told you.

you both walked together up to the table. oscar had his back to you, so you hugged him from behind. other members of the family smiled at lando’s figure behind you as you kissed oscar’s cheeks.

“you brought lando?” your mother asked, a smile plastered on her lips as she walked over to hug the british.

“yeah… hm. i wanted to tell you guys, something…” you started, making every one face you except your brother, who you were still holding. “well, me and lando, we are together.” you slowly let go of oscar as he turned around, a serious expression on his face. “as a couple, boyfriend and girlfriend…” someone let out an excited noise and all you could see were smiley faces.

“finally!” your dad said from across the table, coming closer right after and hugging lando in his own way.

the driver was clearly nervous, but way better then before. a soft smile in his lips as he looked over at you.

you looked at oscar, trying to get a reaction out of him and he simply smiled, nodded and whispered a ‘congratulations’ to both of you, before turning around to eat again.

you sort of expected a better reaction from your brother, maybe an excited one, maybe a protective one.

the aussie looked like he didn’t care enough to give it a minute of attention.

maybe it was just because today was supposed to be about him, and you ruined it. maybe he wasn’t so pleased to have lando as a brother-in-law. maybe he was just tired because of the race.

you didn’t give it too much thinking, you moved to his right, sat next to him with lando by your side, and ate. making conversation with everyone around and looking over to lando from time to time, to make sure he was doing okay.

that night, you got home with lando and received an extremely good feedback from your family. they loved norris, and were delighted to have him as a part of the family.

oscar, who didn’t seem to be so pleased, never texted you. you noticed it and found it strange, but once again thought there could be other explanations to it. not just that he abhorred the idea of you two together.

some weeks passed away and you were now on lando’s driver room. sitting on the edge of the couch, caressing his hair.

norris knew you loved formula one more than almost everything, so he made sure to have you there in japan with him, since oscar had already gifted his own passes.

your boyfriend looked over at you with a concerned look.

“hey, baby, have you talked to oscar after we told him we were together?” he asked, playing with the zipper of his race suit.

“i don’t think so.” you stopped to think, and realized you hadn’t indeed talked to him. which was odd, as you were always glued to each other. “i think he’s been pretty busy.”

lando hummed and you looked down at his face. “why?” you asked, he shook his head while looking at you.

“nothing, love. it just looks like he’s avoiding me.” with half-closed eyes, you hummed.

after all, your theory might not be wrong. maybe oscar didn’t like the idea of you and lando as more than friends.

“i’ll try to talk to him, lan.” you bent down to kiss his forehead. “you have free practice in a few minutes, don’t worry about this. it will be okay.”

he sat up and hugged you.

“i love you.” he smiled against your neck.

“i love you too. good luck, baby.” you smiled back, feeling his lips on the sensitive skin. he eventually got up and left the room. you stayed back a little to get his laptop and notebook, for after the fp sessions.

lando had two shitty sessions, finishing 10th in one and 12th in the other. on the other hand, oscar managed to pull some really good laps, finishing 8th and 1st.

your boyfriend got out of the car and looked over at you to let you know he was okay, as that was always a preoccupation, and talked with his mechanics, giving them feedback about the car and what could be improved.

oscar did the same thing, not taking so long because there wasn’t really much that the mechanics could do on his car.

piastri’s feedback after the first free practice helped him realize that the problem was how long he took to brake on the corners. improving that, he made an incredible fp2.

“osc, good job.” you smiled at your brother as he passed by. the aussie simply nodded his head before going into his driver room.

you thought of following him immediately and get things cleared out, but maybe you should just wait for lando. this was about him too, after all.

your family wasn’t here yet, because, except for your father, none of them actually liked formula one. they liked that your brother was brilliant doing it, but they didn’t really know anything or cared about the sport. so they only came for the race. never even qualifying.

your dad watched them from home, not wanting to leave your mother alone with all the hosting responsibilities.

once norris was freed, he walked up to you and held you in his arms.

“you were distracted out there.” you stated. the british let out a frustrated sigh.

“i know… it’s just the oscar situation. he’s one of my closest friends in formula one. i don’t want him to hate me.” you chuclked, pulling the man closer to you.

“he doesn’t hate you.” you commented. ��let’s talk to him.” lando’s eyes widened and he pulled back to try and see if you were serious.

“now?” he asked and you nodded, grabbing his hand and pulling him though the garage until you reached oscar’s private room.

hearing a knock on his door, oscar ran to the door.

“hi?” he was confused with your presence. it wasn’t you he was waiting for.

“hey. i think we need to talk.” without asking for permission, you entered and dragged lando inside with you.

“we do, actually.” oscar states, closing the door and leaning against his table. lando took place on top of a balcony and you leaned against that same balcony, standing face to face with your big brother.

no one said anything for some seconds. trying to figure out what was the best way to start this important conversation.

“you guys should’ve told me.” oscar said, looking between the both of you. anyone who knew him could tell how hurt he was. his eyes reflecting it.

“we told you!” you remarked.

“yeah, after what? two months?” he sarcastically pointed out. “next time send me a letter, maybe it would be faster.” you rolled your eyes and lando stood still, understanding oscar’s side perfectly.

“this isn’t about you.” you said, lando touched your back gently, trying to calm you down.

“you are my sister, y/n! do you even know how much i care about this? you are my other half, the person i love the most in this whole entire world!” oscar’s voice rose a little as he spoke. “and lando, you are my friend! you both kept this from me and discarded me in the process. i was informed at the same time that auntie joannah was!”

you felt the urge to laugh at the mention of the old lady’s name, but kept your expression still. a little more saddened now that you were realizing just how big your mistake was.

“oscar…”

“no, y/n. let me finish.” he asked. you simply nodded, and he continued. his arms were crossed in front of his chest now and he had his race suit halfway down. “you have been distancing yourself and i have no idea of why. at first i thought you weren’t okay because of hate or how things were going with tennis, but you don’t seem very preoccupied with that, so i really don’t know.”

he takes a deep breath before speaking again. “i’m sure you had your reasons, but you’re my best friend, y/n, and constantly feeling like you don’t trust me anymore, or don’t consider me as you did before… it hurts.”

sadness embraces you as you listen to your brother. lando caresses your shoulder from behind you.

“maybe i should leave you two to talk, this is family matter.” the british suggests.

“you’re family.” both you and oscar say in unison. lando couldn’t help but feel his heart warm, smiling softly to himself as you think of some way to explain things to oscar.

“you know, i would have been your relationship’s biggest supporter if you had given me the chance.” oscar was the one to talk again, and you couldn’t hold back anymore. you needed to hug him, and so you did.

it was a clumsy hug, but it meant everything to you.

“i never meant to hurt you, osc.” you truthfully told him, feeling his grip tightening around you. “it was supposed to be a surprise…”

“what a fucking great way to do it.”

as you both hugged each other, lando watched from the balcony. he too was scared of losing oscar’s friendship, but he was sure that you would do the right thing, and sort things out.

“i never thought you would see this as a good thing. from the start, you and lando got along really really well, and i never wanted to get in the way of that, but i did not control it.” tears threatened to come out of your eyes at any time.

“when it happened, when we happened, i was terrified… but this was strong, i couldn’t stay away from him even if i tried. it was the kind of love you can not put down… and the idea seemed to be less and less terrifying.” you tried to explain. oscar payed close attention to every word you said, and lando, from the balcony, did the same thing.

it was the first time you opened up to someone other than your own figure in the mirror.

“and then i embraced this. this idea of being his, and then he asked me to be his girlfriend and i could never say no. i love him!”

you turn around to look at lando, who hugged his knees and smiled at you. oscar looked too and immediately realized that norris was the one for you. just by his eyes.

“but i still wasn’t prepared to tell you, because of every single devilish thought in my head. so i kept my distance because i know i wouldn’t be able to lie or hide anything from you. but i never, ever, stopped trusting you or considered you less.” you remarked. “you’re my osc, my big brother, you are my everything, and i’m sorry for not communicating.”

you could see in his eyes how hurt he was, and you hated to think it was all because of you.

“i’m sorry, oscar. i really am.”

“i like to know stuff. and i love you,” he pulls you into a real hug this time, allowing you to breathe freely again.

lando, who was still sat on the balcony, walked over towards you and stood next to you, watching the sibling moment with admiration in his eyes.

it was rare to find such a connection.

when you two pulled apart, lando finally broke his silence.

“hey, osco… i’m sorry too man. we both thought about surprising you, and i may have been a little more guilty than y/n there, because i didn’t want you to hate me for dating your sister.”

oscar smiled at the brit.

“i trust you with her, and i don’t hate you. but if you ever even think about hurting her...” lando nodded knowingly, and they touched hands.

“i would never. i really love her.” oscar pulled your boyfriend into a hug and you stood back, watching the two of them.

“i can see it.” oscar smiled as they pulled back.

lando ran his hand from behind your neck until he reached your shoulder, and pulled you close. he kissed the top of your head.

“i’m family now eh?” lando bragged and oscar rolled his eyes.

“don’t make me regret it.”

[tateshifts]

MY SHIFTING METHOD ⋆｡˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚

♯ this is the method that i found works well for me! it took me around 4 months to shift and i first shifted on October 30th 2020.

the method

╰┈➤ the void state & 5 senses method.

AWAKE METHOD!

✮ . . . i lay down, flat on my back in bed & under the covers. i put on my headphones and play some white noise, i don’t close my eyes i just stare at a point in my ceiling.

✮ . . . the more i stare at my ceiling, the less i see. my vision starts to blur and then i see stars and then after 5 minutes my mind doesn’t focus on it anymore so i don’t see anything kind of? it looks black to me with a few stars when i direct my attention back to it. but just don’t focus on it- this is now the void state!!

✮ . . . i quickly count to 5 over and over in my head, as fast as i can count. once i feel myself become lighter, relaxed and less tense i start to imagine what i can feel, smell and touch in my dr.

✮ . . . i think about the feel of bedsheets i’m lying on, the smell of mattheo’s aftershave, the light sound of the waves crashing against the large floor to ceiling window coming from the black lake.

✮ . . . at this point i start to feel like im spinning or im floating and i try to ignore the feeling as much as possible so i don’t ground myself back to this reality.

✮ . . . i know i’m in my dr because my surroundings change drastically, the temperature, the bed, the air, the smell, EVERYTHING! so when i’m in my dr i just KNOW.

✮ . . . the method used to take me around 1 hour, but the more you practise the easier and quicker it gets. meditating also helps you practise the void state.

[when i discovered the void state it was very accidental. i just zoned out and stared at patterns on my wall until i chose a certain spot and concentrated on it for 15 minutes and then my vision went black and i felt nothing! so cool lmao]

let me know if you try it & if it works for you!! thanks for reading ❦｡･:*:･ﾟ follows, likes & reblogs are appreciated x

[lilioopdf]

everything in between

pairing: reader x literally anyone i think (no names are mentioned!)

notes: fluff, 0.6k words, no warnings i think (except maybe one word that just means poop)

a/n: hi!! it's been awhile 😓 i wrote this a few weeks ago but i was too busy to edit it and then i started disliking it so i ignored it but i think im p okay with how it is now! if you’re reading this, i hope you’re having a lovely day/night rn and thank you for reading!! 💗💗 (also if anyone here sees this and knows how to properly tune the twt feed of a new acc please lmk 💔💔) okay that’s it please enjoy :p

✧ ‧˚₊ ❆ ‧ ₊ ⊹˚✧ ‧˚₊ ❆ ‧ ₊ ⊹˚✧ ‧˚₊ ❆ ‧ ₊ ⊹˚✧ ‧˚₊ ❆ ‧ ₊ ⊹˚ ✧ ‧˚₊ ❆ ‧ ₊

he’s been uncharacteristically soft lately.

not that you’re complaining— of course not.

not when he’s this close to you right now, his body heavy and warm between your legs, face buried into the crook of your neck.

out of instinct, you reach out and play with his hair, gently massaging his scalp, coaxing out a low groan from him, his chest rumbling with the sound as he shifts slightly to give you better access to the rest of his head.

it must’ve been the separation, you think. people say that anyway, that distance makes the heart grow fonder or something. it must be true, if the time away has resulted in this.

why else would he allow himself to be this close to you right now? when he’s done nothing but try to set boundaries this whole time, citing PR reasons and his career.

it’s a little strange, to be honest. having him this close to you. you wonder what it must be like to be able to just casually touch him like this, often. has anyone ever had the privilege?

a deep inhale from him snaps you out of your thoughts, as he lifts his head to look at your face, gaze still a little hazy with sleep. he blinks once. twice. before laying his head back down, sighing as he says quietly, “you smell nice.”

he whispers it as though it’s a secret, and you find yourself at a loss for words, only capable of mustering out a simple, “oh.”

the hand previously playing with his hair stills, and you let it drop off the couch, only for him to look back up at you, an almost panicked look in his eyes.

“don’t stop,” he pleads, reaching out after your hand. “it feels nice.”

you oblige, lifting your hand back up, a little awkwardly this time, as your elbow accidentally hits his shoulder. he jolts away, tensing up before relaxing again.

“shit- sorry,” you apologise, the words leaving you in a hurried mess.

he shakes his head slightly, his hair tickling your chin with the motion. “no, don’t apologise. i’m just a little sore.”

you wince. “sorry, maybe i should’ve woken you up to sleep on the bed instead.”

he’s quick to correct you, gently enveloping your hand in his as he speaks up again, “not from you. just— from training. it’s been brutal lately.” a pause. “i like this.”

you blink a few times, processing his words, before choosing to change the topic instead. “do you have any training today?”

he hums in response, shaking his head. “no, do you? have plans today, i mean.”

"no."

there's an even longer pause.

its awkward, and you want to squeeze your eyes shut and pretend to be asleep, the air heavy with the desire to ask the other for something that seems like too much.

he finally breaks the ice. "maybe we could hang out then." he lifts his head to look at you again, eyes looking at you almost a little expectantly.

a few seconds pass and then, finally— you nod, inhaling deeply. "yes, okay. we can... hang out. of course."

you're grateful for him, to even be this close to him right now, in more ways than one. despite the awkwardness at times, he's sweet to you, and consistently kind.

you're so wrapped up in your thoughts that you almost miss the way the corners of his lips quirk up into a small smile at your response, and you feel a gentle smile making its way onto your face in return. oh.

you're grateful for him, for you, and for everything in between.

✧ ‧˚₊ ❆ ‧ ₊ ⊹˚✧ ‧˚₊ ❆ ‧ ₊ ⊹˚✧ ‧˚₊ ❆ ‧ ₊ ⊹˚✧ ‧˚₊ ❆ ‧ ₊ ⊹˚ ✧ ‧˚₊ ❆ ‧ ₊

© lilioopdf 2024 – please do not plagarise, repost, or translate any of my work on this or other platforms

thank you for reading this far!! stay hydrated and stay safe!! 💗💗

[sunflowersteves]

i'm not cute || m.o.

pairing || miguel o'hara x fem!reader

summary || Miguel always loved when you played with his hair.

author's notes || this is my first miguel fic and im v excited!! there will be much more to come <3 also, my spanish is v v v limited and i tried following what ppl were saying in the miguel tag but please let me know if I need to fix anything!!

warnings || none, fluff, it's tooth-rotting

“Did you just braid my hair?”

You paused—froze even. Your hands stilled in between his luscious, soft hair, and it took every ounce inside of you to not continue to feel through each strand of his. 

“Uh, no?” It was bashful. 

You inwardly winced at the extremely unconvincing tone of your voice. You couldn’t see, but his lips curled into the smallest of smiles. His spidey-DNA, as you liked to call it, sensed the heat that radiated off of your body. 

After an unsuccessful mission, Miguel came home in a state of ire. His eyebrows were furrowed, anger rolling off of his body in waves as his chest heaved up and down. But as soon as your hand placed itself across the plains of his chest and soothed the fabric of his suit, everything started to dissipate. 

The anger, the grief, the guilt—everything. 

You gently pulled his wrist, and he blindly followed you into the living room of your makeshift apartment he built in Nueva York. You sat right above him on the couch, brush in your hand as you stroked through each strand of hair. His frame practically barrelled over you, despite him sitting on the ground with his back to the legs of the couch.

 In return, he wanted to desperately turn around and press light kisses into your skin, but he refrained. He knew that all you wanted to do was comfort his tense muscles. 

“That didn’t sound very convincing.”

You bite your lip, sheepishly, as you ignored his comment and started to braid another part of his hair. You very carefully twisted the fluffy soft hair between one another and grinned at the What he didn’t have to know wouldn’t hurt him, right? Well, apparently, you were wrong because once you tugged on his hair, yet again, and he practically jumps. 

“¡Ay!” He yelps and turns his head to look at you, “¿Qué mierda haces?” 

Your eyes widened, “Miggy! Oh—I’m so sorry!” You go to reach for his head again in an attempt to soothe the pain that you caused, but he caught your wrist. 

If you weren’t too concerned about tugging on his hair, you would have noticed the slight change in his lips that turned into a sly smirk. “Cariño,” He warned. His voice was gravelly and rough—the sound sending shivers down your spine. “¿Qué voy a hacer contigo?” 

In one motion, he’s hovering over you. “Hmm?”

Your mouth opens in surprise—the spark in your heartbeat not going unnoticed by the man before you. “I–I just, Miguel—” You were starting to get nervous under his gaze—just like you always do.

Pure adoration flashed between his ruby eyes, and his finger gently rubbed against the side of your cheek. It was so gentle and affectionate that it almost created tears against your waterline. He loved when you got nervous and playful—it always struck against his chest and seized him whole. He wanted to see the effect that he had on you in every waking moment, it seemed. 

He smiled. “You’re cute.”

You gasped, attempting to turn the tables around and flip him over. “I am not cute!” Alas, you were unsuccessful. 

He laughed. It was hearty and pretty against your ears. “You’re right. You’re the cutest.”

You grumbled under your breath, and it took every ounce of control not to kiss the puffing of your cheeks. “Whatever, you’re the cutest. Not me.” 

Miguel smiled—teeth showing and entirely genuine as he took in your playful expression and fingers that twisted the short hair against the base of his neck. 

“I’ll eventually make you admit it, mi alma. Don't you worry."

~~

¿Qué mierda haces? - What the fuck are you doing?

Cariño - Honey

¿Qué voy a hacer contigo? - What am i going to do with you?

Mi alma - my soul

[cozage]

Hi. How are you? Can I put in a request for Law x Corazon’s daughter? Corazon asks Law to take care of his wife and daughter (she is his age) if anything were to happen to him. After Corazon dies, Law finds them and stays with them before becoming a pirate and promises to visit. As the years go by, he falls for her and vice versa. Then after Dressrosa (which she helps them with), he asks her to join the crew.

A/N: Im great! anyway…Uhhhh yeah this got way long. I’m not mad about it. I hope it was worth the wait for you :) (you can also read it on AO3 if you dont like the tumblr format for long posts)

Characters: female reader x Law

Cw: sadness, abandonment, parent death

Total word count: 5.2k

A Lifetime Promise

You pout at the boy standing in front of you. “Who are you?” 

Your mom squeezed your hand to silence you. “You must be Trafalgar Law,” She said, smiling at the boy. She seemed tense, like she’s scared of something.

“You have a funny hat,” you remark, looking at the spots. They matched his skin, which was patch-worked like the cows you had at home. 

“You have a funny face,” he spits back, scowling at you. 

You stick your tongue out at him, and your mother picks you up and holds you on her hip. 

“Well, Law. Let’s get you settled into your new home.”

“What?!” you shriek, looking at your mother. “I don’t want him to live with us! He’s mean! And scary looking!”

“Quiet, Y/N!” Your mother hissed at you, squeezing you tighter to her. You could tell she was upset, but you weren’t entirely sure what you had done to make her so sad. So you kept quiet and let your mother lead the strange boy back to your house.

He stayed with you for a few years, and in that time you learned to coexist. You helped him study, and you were there when he got the last drop of lead poisoning out of his system. Both of you cried for the things you had lost and the things you had gained, and you learned to actually enjoy being around him and his friends. 

You spent the summers roaming the forests with Law, Shachi, Penguin, and Bepo, and you spent the winter huddled together in front of a lowly lit fireplace, your mother serving you all hot chocolate. It was heaven in the North Blue Sea, and you never wanted it to end. You all would be together forever, you were certain.

“One week from now, we’re setting out.” He had acquired a small boat, big enough for four people. “We’re going to take on the Grand Line and I’m going to be King of the Pirates.”

“It’ll be a tight fit, but we can all fit I think,” you said, examining the boat. One more person wouldn’t be that much weight.

Law shot you a look, and the other members exchanged looks nervously. They had been anticipating an argument, but they weren’t expecting it to be in front of them. 

“You’re not coming, Y/N-ya.”

You looked at him, trying to understand. Your goals have always been aligned. Go to the Grand Line and take down the Donquixote family. To take revenge for your father and for Law. 

“A pirate's life is a man’s life. You wouldn’t fit in. We all talked about it, and you’re better off staying here. Where you’re safe.” 

“I don’t want to be safe, Law,” you cried, your eyes filling with tears. “I want to be with you! We had plans!”

“Plans change.”

“You’re really going to leave me behind?” Your broken voice and bleary eyes were almost enough to change his mind. 

“I never promised to take you with me,” he snapped. He tried to ignore the pain in his chest when you ran away crying, but the dull ache didn’t go away.

The coldness between the two of you was worse than any winter storm you had ever encountered. He said goodbye when he thought you were asleep, and you laid there silently without responding. It was easier for you both that way. 

--

He didn’t return for another year, and when you saw the pirate flag the four of you had created now painted on a submarine, your heart soared. 

“Law!” You screamed, jumping onto the deck as if it were second nature. 

You leaped into his arms for a hug and he caught you, spinning you around with the momentum you both had gathered. 

“I missed you,” he whispered, clutching you close to him. 

Your heart skipped a beat. “Let me come with you this time!” 

His hands gripped tighter against your back, grabbing fists of fabric from your cloth dress. 

“Just kidding!” You say quickly, not wanting to pick up a year old fight. You scrunch your nose at him and your other three friends. “I bet you guys smell. So. Bad.”

Everyone laughs at that, and you pull away from Law nervously, hugging your other friends who you’ve missed just as much. 

Their visit was short, but you made the most out of the two days they stayed in port. You showed them new restaurants, and revisited some of your old adventures, and explored the marketplace with Law to make dinner for your mom one night. 

And when they left, you stood at the cliffside and waved until they were out of sight, praying their telescope wasn’t good enough to see the tears in your eyes.

--

It was three and a half years until Trafalgar Law came back to you, but it felt like a lifetime. You had learned to live with the pain of his absence, and tried your best to move on. But every time the light glimmered on the ocean, you could feel your heart calling out to him. 

Law came quietly that time. He was surprised when he looked for you at your usual spots and you weren’t anywhere to be found. He wandered the streets with his crew - now 7 strong - searching for you. 

“She’s down in the Trademark Hotel. She works the front desk now, dear,” an elderly woman at a stall said. 

He tried not to quicken his pace, but everyone could feel his speed increase, and worked to match it. His new crew was desperate to see the girl he returned home to, and his old crew members missed your face. 

He rushed in to see you standing at the desk, talking to a man who was dressed in a fancy suit. You laughed, and Law could feel his heart clench with joy at the sound of your voice. He couldn’t help but see a piece of Corazon in your smile now.

Your eyes slid over to the door to greet the new customers, and you screamed out upon realization of his identity, startling the man beside you. 

“Law!” You jumped over the desk and he opened his arms for an embrace as you ran to him. He held you in his arms for just a moment before you pulled away, and he reluctantly let you go. 

“Oh my god, this is perfect timing!” you squealed, running back to grab the man’s hand. “Jami, this is Law. You remember me talking about him, right?”

“Yeah…” the man eyed Law and his crew. “The pirate crew?”

You laughed. “And my best friend!”

“He’s more like your brother, isn’t he?” He smirked. “Since you were raised together.”

“We’re not siblings,” both you and Law said at the same time, and you laughed at your synchronicity, but Law’s eyes stayed fixed on the man.

Law frowned, looking between you and this stranger. He had his arm wrapped around your waist, and he was standing extremely close to you. It was clear you all were close, but Law had never seen him before. He was glaring at Law, as if he expected some sort of challenge from the pirate.  

You took a deep breath, and then broke the news. “Law, this is my boyfriend, Jamison.”

Law’s eyes widened at the news. You were too preoccupied waving to Shachi and the others, but it was enough for Jamison to see his visible reaction. 

“The three of us should have dinner tonight,” Jamison said, looking at Law with a smirk. “If you can leave your crew for that long.”

“No way! Everyone needs to come.” You pressed your hand against Jamison’s chest playfully, and Law felt something twist inside of him. “You have new people in your life too, Law. Introduce us!”

Law finally breaks his gaze from Jamison and looks at you, his jealousy melting away when he sees your smile. Things felt more normal when he looked at you and heard your voice.

“I’ll set up a reservation at the hotel restaurant for ten. Oh, and mom. So eleven. Does five o’clock sound okay?”

“Perfect.” He smiled back at you, and for a moment you were alone together in a crowded room. 

Jamison cleared his throat, bringing you both back to the group. He looked at Law and his crew. “The dress code is a bit more…” he paused to scan the pirates. “...Formal. I hope you have nicer clothes available than those.”

Law frowns, and he sees you mimic his own facial expression in response to Jamison’s words. “I think the Trademark can make exceptions for distinguished guests.” you said sweetly. 

“Darling,” the man hissed, squeezing your side causing you to flinch. “The Trademark has a reputation to uphold, don’t you think?”

Law resisted the urge to punch the man right then and there. If he stepped in now, you would only be angry about his interference. He knew he had to grit his teeth and let you handle it. He fully expected you to give some snarky remark back to Jamison and stand up for yourself and his crew. But the spunk he remembered you having seemed to have dissipated over the years, and your rebelling heart was more soft spoken than he remembered. 

You offered a compromise instead of a fight. “Then we’ll go to Cordelia’s.” 

“I don’t think Cordelia’s is the proper place for this occasion,” Jamison retaliated.

“Then don’t come.” Your voice was short and to the point, and Law could see the fire of defiance begin to relight in your eyes. 

“Cordelia’s sounds lovely,” Law interjected quickly before the fight escalated too much. “Still five?”

You gave him a tight smile and a quick nod, and then broke from Jamiston’s hold to run and wrap your arms around Law’s neck again. 

“It really is so good to see you again, Law.”

He held you tight for a moment, trying to remember the feeling of your body against his before he let go. “You too. See you at five,” he said, walking out the door. 

When Law arrived at Cordelia’s, he noticed the table was only set for ten, but nobody in his crew commented on it. Law kept the seat next to him open, in hopes that you would take it rather than your snotty boyfriend. But as it turned out, he didn’t need to worry about it. Only you and your mother showed. 

“Sorry I’m late!” you say, taking the seat beside Law without a second thought. 

“You’re always late,” Law teased. 

You waved him off, rolling your eyes at him. You leaned over so you could see his three new crew members. “I’m Y/N,” you said. “I’m so sorry I didn’t officially introduce myself earlier! I was just so overwhelmed with seeing Law and Shachi and Penguin and Bepo!”

“She didn’t even acknowledge us earlier,” Penguin said under his breath, causing Law to shoot him a glare. 

The rest of Law’s crew introduced themselves, and you spent a lot of time asking about them and their lives. Law could feel your nervous energy, like you were interviewing celebrities or famous royalty. You wanted to know everything about their lives and how they became a pirate, and by the time dessert rolled around, there was no time left to talk about yourself. 

“Can I walk you back to your place?” Law asked as you got up from the table after the meal. 

“Such a gentleman!” you gasped, feigning surprise. “Heart Pirate crew, it was lovely to meet you. Please come back anytime! You’re always welcome here.”

Law held out his arm and you grinned as you took it, overly dramatic in your actions. You walked down the cobblestoned streets in the moonlight, quiet for a while until Law broke the silence. 

“No Jamison for dinner?” he questioned innocently. 

You scowled. “I don’t want to talk about him,” you replied. “Jami always says Cordelia’s is our spot. He doesn’t like to share with other people.”

“He doesn’t seem like-”

“Law,” you warn, irritation creeping into your voice. “I really don’t want to talk about him right now.”

“Okay, fine.” He eyed you, but your face was completely unreadable. He wasn’t sure when he had lost the ability to read your emotions, but it saddened him now. 

“Can we go to the harbor before you take me home?”

“Of course, Milady,” he said, ushering you towards the sea wall at the bottom of the hill. 

You all sat on the wall, staring at the moon and its reflection against the ocean. 

“Tell me a story, Law.” It was something you used to say when you were kids. On the nights one of you had such terrible nightmares that you woke up crying, and the other would crawl into bed with the other. You always begged him to make up some kind of story to get your mind off of things. He was a good storyteller. 

He chuckled. “We’re a bit old for that, don’t you think?” He looked over at you, but your eyes were on the sea, deep in thought. 

“Tell me a real story, then.”

He obliged, of course. He’d do anything for you. Keep her happy and keep her safe. That’s what Corazon had asked of Law when he was a child. A lifelong promise for the man who gave him a life worth living. 

He told you the story of giant bees who hated humans, but loved Bepo’s fur. The crew had to make trades of honey for Bepos fur, and how it saved them from starvation and left Bepo half bald. 

“That can’t be true!” you giggled, pushing him away from you. “Tell me a true story!”

“It’s true! I swear!” He said, smirking at you. 

“Promise?” you looked up at him with wide eyes, desperately wanting to believe him.

He was about to respond, but your gaze distracted him. You all stared at each other for a few moments, hovering close to each other. Not touching, just out of reach.

“Take me to sail with you, Trafalgar Law,” you begged. “I won’t ask for anything ever again. Just take me with you.”

He desperately wanted to take you away from this island, from the man who claimed to love you and the mediocre job you worked. But he made a promise. 

“I can’t,” he whispers, and you can hear the pain he's causing himself in rejecting you. 

You pull away, breaking your eye contact with him to stare out into the sea. You want to cry, but no tears would come. You were expecting this response from him. You were expecting rejection from him. It still stung, but not as much as you were anticipating. 

“Okay,” you say with a nod, pushing down your sadness. “I won’t ask you again.”

You rise to your feet, and turn your back to the ocean and your best friend, and walk into your house on the dock. Law didn’t even have time to beg you to stay before you had vanished into the night. 

Law found your house the next morning with the help of a friend of yours. Of course, Jamison answered the door with that signature cocky sneer on his face. 

“She’s not feeling well,” he said, glancing at the back room. “How about you try again tomorrow?”

“We’re leaving tomorrow,” Law says, trying to push past the man. “I need to see her before we go.”

“I’ll send her your way if she’s feeling up to it, okay?” He starts to shut the door, but Law jams his foot into the opening to prevent it from closing completely. 

“I need to see her.”

“No, you don’t,” Jamison said, kicking Law’s foot out of the doorway. “I don’t need my future wife being influenced by a bunch of pirates. Your presence is bad for her. You make her rude and disobedient.” He pauses to look out to the harbor, and his smirk returns. “You might want to hurry, it looks like some Navy ships got a tip about a notorious pirate crew on this island. Wouldn’t want you to get caught.”

Law looks to the harbor and finds 10 marine ships on the horizon, and he takes off towards his crew, cursing the coward you’re with. 

“I’ll be back,” Law whispers into the air as he runs for his ship. “I promise.”

--

Law finally made it back to you two years later, praying that you wouldn’t be giving him another major life update when he found you again. He was terrified that he’d come back to you and you’d be engaged to that pompous ass - or even worse, married. He wanted you to be happy, but he knew you weren’t happy with that man.

The crew could sense his tenseness in the days leading up to the arrival on their home island. But nobody talked about it, until Shachi finally went into his office as they docked.

“Are you going to ask her this time?” He demanded. “You know she’ll say yes.”

“I don’t want her on the ship,” Law said. He didn’t even bother to look up from his book. 

“Bullshit,” Shachi replied. “You have Ikkaku here now too. You can’t even use that stupid “No Girls Allowed” rule.”

Law didn’t respond. It had been what he told you years ago, and he had to admit he was a little nervous to see how you’d respond to seeing a woman on his crew. 

“Captain,” Shachi said, walking over to his desk. “Ask her.”

Law finally looked up from his book. “I’ll consider it.”

When they docked, Law was the first off the ship. The others didn’t bother to follow him, they knew they’d see you soon enough. 

He made a beeline for the Trademark, and was surprised to find that there had been a name change in the past year and a half. 

It was now the Heart Hotel.

He walked into the lobby, but your smiling face wasn’t the one to greet him, and his heart sunk. A young woman sat at the front desk, but it wasn’t you.

“Hello, how can I help you today sir?” Her voice was high pitched and overenthusiastic, but Law couldn’t tell if she was genuine or not. 

“I’m looking for Y/N.” Law said, looking around. “Does she still work here?”

The girl at the front desk laughed at his question, but Law didn’t understand why. 

“Let me go get her. Please wait right here. What business do you have with her today?”

Law frowned, unsure how to answer the question. “Personal, I guess?”

The girl nodded and receded into a back room. A moment later he heard your voice cry out, and he relaxed a little bit. 

“WHAT?!” He could hear quickened footsteps, and the door to the back rooms opened, revealing your frame. 

He smiled when he saw you, but it was quickly erased when he saw your downward knitted brows and angry look on your face. 

“Trafalgar Law!” you screeched, storming out to where he was standing. You pulled your hand back and swung it around, your palm hitting his cheek full force. Before Law had time to react, you grabbed his shirt and pulled him close to you, so your face was only centimeters away. You were shorter than him, but with this amount of rage, he couldn’t help but feel intimidated by you.

“Don’t you ever leave me without saying goodbye again!” You said, and he could see tears in your eyes. Your glare breaks, and you crumple into his chest and let out a sob. 

“Why did you do that?” you cried. He wrapped his arms around you, and held you tight against him. 

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, holding you tight. He didn’t make excuses or try to explain. It didn’t matter now. “I’m here now. It won’t happen again, I promise.”

You nod into his chest and pull away from him, viciously wiping the tears away with your hands. 

“God look at me, I’m such a mess.” Your voice is still thick from crying. “Amanda, I’m going on break. If anyone needs me-”

“They won’t,” Amanda finishes, and you laugh at her response. Then she corrects herself with, “I know, I’ll call you on the transponder snail.”

“Looks like you’ve moved up a bit in the hotel,” Law states as you take his arm and lead him out the door. 

Your laugh rings out, and Law feels his heart flutter in his chest. “I’m the owner now, thank you very much!”

“The owner?” he gasped, looking at you. Your chest is puffed out proudly and you’re carrying yourself with more confidence than the last time he saw you. 

“Yep! You like the name?”

“I was wondering about that,” he mumbled, looking up at the top of the hotel, where name was proudly displayed. 

You giggled again and bumped into him as you walked. “I missed you, Law.”

“I missed you too,” he said, bumping back into you. “You seem to be doing good for yourself.”

“Oh, I love running the hotel!” He can feel your excitement. “It’s something I didn’t even know I was good at, but it’s so fun! And the restaurant is interesting to work in too! It keeps me busy, but me and mom run it together and we work with local farmers and suppliers for everything in the restaurant and for the hotel.”

He listens to you ramble on about the intricacies of the business, and he feels his heart sink. He was going to ask you to come with him, to join him in his adventure. But he can’t pull you away from this life. He can’t pull you away from this happiness. He’s not so selfish that he would do that to you or your mother. He made a promise, and he would be breaking it by asking you to leave now. 

When you finish talking about your new business, you both find yourselves at the door of your house on the dock. 

“Would you like to come in?” You ask, pulling out your key. “I can make dinner for-your crew! How many are there now? I can make a reservation at the restaurant if you want!”

“There’s thirteen of us in total, but we still don’t have any fancy outfits, I’m afraid.”

You roll your eyes and open the door, trying to usher Law into the house. “The Heart Hotel isn’t as snobby under my new management. Table for 15, got it. Come on in.”

But Law kept standing outside. “Are you sure it’s okay with Jamison that I come in?”

You scowl, and you realize that he’s waiting for some kind of update on more than your professional life. He glances down at your hands, but there’s no sign of commitment around your fingers. 

“That kind of crashed and burned.” Your tone indicates that you won’t be going into any further detail, but Law isn’t quite done with his questions. 

“It looks like you came out on top, at least.” He walks into the house, looking around. It’s decorated similarly to the house you all grew up in, evident that only you and your mother were living in the space. “The hotel, the house…”

“Law.” Your voice told him he was getting into dangerous territory. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Okay, okay,” he said, flopping on the couch. He didn’t want to drop the conversation, but he could tell that he wouldn’t be getting any more information out of you at the moment. 

You put out a snack tray, and called Amanda on the snail transponder. “Hey dear, could you put in a reservation for 15 please? 6 pm should be good, but we might be a little late.”

Amanda and you chatted briefly, and then you came back to the living room to sit across from Law. 

“So, how’s the sea life treating you?” 

He talked about his adventures, telling you about his three new members on the crew. He saw you tense at the mention of a female joining the crew, but you didn’t say anything. You just snacked on the cheese and crackers and listened to his stories quietly. 

You desperately wanted to ask him to take you with him again, but you refrained. After the last time, where you begged him to go and then he left without saying goodbye, you promised not to ask anymore. And you would hold true to your promise, no matter how much it hurt to let him leave again. 

Law left you to round up his crew, and you all met up again outside of the Heart Hotel. You could tell his crew adored their captain, and it was good to see your old friends and meet your new ones. 

Dinner was delightful, and you could tell the chefs had put their entire soul into creating the meal for you all. 

“It looks like you’ve got the best of the best working for you,” the crew complimented. 

“Oh, they are! I love the creative liberty they take in each meal.” The more you talked, the more apparent it was that you loved the life you had built. 

Shachi and Law exchanged a look, a sense of understanding passing through them. 

“How long are you here for?” You finally asked after dessert was served. 

“We’re actually pulling out tomorrow morning,” Law said, ignoring the look of shock from his crew. They had anticipated being in port for at least a few days. 

“What?” Your spoon dropped out of your hand from the surprise. “So soon? I can put you up in-”

“That’s not necessary,” Law said, cutting you off. “I just wanted to stop by and say hello as we passed through.”

“I see,” you said carefully, trying to beat around the bush of the question you wanted to ask. “Are you heading to the Grand Line?”

“Not yet,” Law admitted. “We should be ready soon.”

“You’ll visit before you go for good, right?”

“Promise.”

--

He came back to find you a year and a half later. He had his mind set for the Grand Line, and he was finally going to ask you to come with him. You had to be by his side if he was going to succeed in being the King of the Pirates. 

When he walked into the Heart Hotel, he saw Amanda, who didn’t seem surprised to see him at all.

“Trafalgar Law,” Amanda said with a sad smile on her face. “She said you’d come back.”

Her words raised the hair on his neck. They were ominous and foreboding, and she spoke as if she knew something he didn’t. She walked to the back and came out with a envelope, which she handed off to him. 

“This was what she left you.”

“Where is she?” he demanded. His name was on the front of the envelope, the handwriting in your style. He felt sick to his stomach.

“I’m not sure,” Amanda said. “Off on some great adventure. There’s more in the note. You should read it.”

He walked down to the sea wall and sat, opening the letter to find out what happened to you. The date was marked 10 months after he had last visited.

Law, 

Mom died this morning. She got sick a few weeks ago, and it all happened pretty fast. The doctors said she didn’t suffer much, and she passed peacefully in her sleep. So I guess there’s some comfort in that. I wish I could’ve told you another way. Maybe I’ll find you and we can talk about it face to face before you’re reading this. 

I can’t stay here. Everywhere I look reminds me of you or her. This place I loved just feels dead now. Maybe I’ve outgrown it. Maybe I need something more. 

The last time you were here, I was hoping you would ask me to join you. But I see now that you don’t want me to be a part of your crew for whatever reason. Don’t worry, I’m not angry about it. I understand that you want to live your own life, and I don’t hold that against you. 

But I can’t wait around for you to brighten up my life every few years. I have to make my own adventure. So I’m heading off to be my own captain, going straight for the Grand Line. I’m going to do what we promised we’d do all those years ago. I’m going to go find my uncle and take revenge on my father. Some way or another. 

I hope I’ll see you on the Grand Line. We’ll meet as Pirate Captains, but don’t take too long, or I’ll beat you to the One Piece. 

See you soon.

Law shoved your note into his pocket and took off towards his crew. He wasn’t even sure if you had made it to the Grand Line, or how you would survive it long enough to get to Dressrosa. 

“We need to go,” he yelled at the crew. “The Grand Line! Now!”

Shachi looked behind the captain, waiting to see you tagging along. But you didn’t appear. “Captain, where-”

“She left!” He yelled. “She went to the Grand Line already!” 

“What?!” The crew yelled in unison. 

--

He heard rumors of a one-woman ship in Alabasta, but there wasn’t much information besides that. And then, on Kite Rose Island, he heard that you had disappeared. People speculated if you had been killed by an enemy ship, or sold into slavery, or sunk into the ocean. Law got sick to his stomach whenever he thought about it. 

But he still had a promise to fulfill. To take down Doflamingo. For you and for Corazon. 

--

And he did. With the help of the Strawhat Pirates and some luck, he finally succeeded. And as he sat with Sengoku, he couldn’t help but bring up your name. 

“Did you know he had a daughter?”

Sengoku raised his brow and smiled. “I kept tabs on her,” he said. “She came to Dressrosa about two years ago, and has been operating under the Donquixote family. I’m surprised you didn’t know.”

“She made it?” Law breathed out, unable to believe you had been here the whole time. 

Sengoku laughed. “How do you think your friends were able to navigate the colosseum so easily to escape? Or that the Tontattas made it to Dressrosa so quickly? How do you think Princess Viola avoided detection of her betrayal for so long? She may not have been an inner family of Doflamingo, but she was high on his rank and extremely trusted. Any time you thought luck was on your side, I assure you it was her.”

Law struggled to stand, looking around for you over the cliffside. 

“If I remember correctly, she was heading for the castle the last I saw her.”

He ran as fast as his feet would carry him. Even in his weakened state, he willed his body to stay upright to find you. His eyes desperately searched every face he saw, looking for your eyes, your smile. He had tried to abandon the hope that you were alive over the past three years since he found your letter, but it had never truly died. 

Finally, he found you laughing with the purple-haired princess of Dressrosa. He called your name, and he saw you turn to him, scanning the faces until you met his eyes.

“Law!” You screamed. You abandoned Viola and took off towards him at full speed, tears streaming down your face. 

He tried to brace himself for the impact he knew was coming, but it wasn’t enough, and the two of you tumbled onto the floor. He pulled you into his chest and refused to let you go, and you laid against him, sobbing. 

“You did it,” you cried, getting tears and snot all over his coat. 

“We did it,” he corrected. “We couldn’t have done it without you.”

You cried harder into his chest at his praise, and he stroked your hair gently. He didn’t care that the two of you were causing a giant scene in front of everyone. He blinked back tears of his own, relieved to know you were finally back in his arms and you were safe. 

“Sail with me. Join my crew.” It wasn’t a question, but you nodded in response. 

“I’ll follow you anywhere captain,” you sobbed. “I promise.”

He pulled you closer to him, never wanting to let you go. “And I’ll never leave you alone. I promise.”

[justauthoring]

whole wide world.

just the two of you, together, in the whole wide world. and then? it's just you.

a/n -> okay, first, i realize i am late to bcs (as always) and that this probably won't get any notes BUT i just watched 06x03 and i am DISTRAUGHT also please excuse my poor attempt of using spanish endearments :) most of them are from google, so if you guys have suggestions, let me know!

tw. -> warning for better call saul 06x03? im not sure if i should put this, but just in case.

pairing -> ignacio "nacho" varga x f!reader

"we'll get out."

"nacho—"

"no," he cuts in, stepping towards you with a sharp look in his eyes. "we—you, me, my dad... we're gonna get out. all three of us."

letting out a sigh, you shake your head, reaching across the counter to grab his hand in your own. the action seems to still nacho, even if briefly, because he's blinking and his body is easing and then he's meeting your eyes and you see the fear behind them.

"i know," you assure, voice soft and warm. there wasn't an ounce of doubt in your voice. you knew nacho meant what he said and you trusted him wholeheartedly—if he said that you'd get out, he meant it. "i'm just worried."

"it'll be fine."

"will you?"

and he pauses at that, body stilling. he takes one look at you and huffs because he can't lie; you'll see right through him. you always have. so the admittance comes with a shaky sigh, letting his head fall into his hands as he pulls away from you.

"i dunno," he breathes. "i don't know anything."

your heart breaks.

"oh, mi dulce. ignacio."

pulling away from the counter, you make your way around the island, crossing the distance over to him with ease and take him into your arms. your arm wraps around his shoulder and you tug him towards you, ignoring the small fight he gives before he eventually falls into you with a choked sob.

his face presses into the curve of your neck, arms wrapping around your waist as he grips onto you like he's afraid you'll disappear from him.

"what's wrong, cariño?"

and he shakes his head against you, shaking all whilst he does it. you've asked him this question so many times and while this is the first time he's fallen apart on you quite like this, you know the answer will remain the same.

silence.

you know nacho is involved with the cartel and that he has been for a good chunk of his life; the secret of it had been revealed pretty early on in your relationship. it wasn't ideal but you knew at his heart nacho was a good man and in the end, it hadn't been enough to sway you from him.

but something had changed these last few months. things with his father and the cartel and he's been so damn secretive about it all but in your gut you knew it was bad. you're not sure you've seen him smile in weeks or look anything but tense. even when it was just the two of you, he seemed particularly on edge of everything around him.

then he'd told you it wasn't safe for you to take transit to work anymore. when you'd questioned that, he'd refused to say anything. the next day he'd come over with a new car, just for you.

it was clear he was in danger and given the way he'd been extra protective of you lately, you figured that danger extended to you. and his father, probably.

he said he'd get you away, that he'd keep you safe, so you didn't really care all that much about being in danger. you trusted his word and you knew he'd never let anything happen to you.

you were just worried about him.

terribly.

"you have to tell me," you plead, pulling back enough to see his face. nacho blinks at the movement, forcing the tears that had welled in his eyes to disappear, effectively righting himself to alleviate any concern.

it's too late.

"ignacio, please," you beg, squeezing his shoulders, fighting him from walking away. "i just need to know you're okay. i can't go on with this worry anymore. i can't. and you won't—"

he cuts you off by pressing his lips against your own. his movement is swift, quick, catching you by surprise as he tugs you against him by your hip, the other hand moving to brush your hair back and cup your cheek. the fight leaves you the second you feel his lips press against your own, instinctively leaning into his touch as your eyes flutter shut.

and when nacho pulls back and you're breathless, he lets his forehead fall against your own and it's like it's just the two of you in the whole wide world.

"mi amor," he whispers, breath soft and husky. "everything will be okay."

the shuttering breath you've been forcing back falls out of you then, your whole body shaking with the movement as you set your hands on his chest, desperate for the feel of him.

"i promise."

-

the second you're phone rings, you're flipping it open and pressing it to your ear without even checking the contact.

"ignacio?"

"hola mi amor."

your whole body eases, slumping against the back of your chair with a flush of relief you haven't felt in days. you take a moment, before snapping yourself back to attention; "where have you been? are you okay? i've been so worried, nacho. oh, gosh... are you hurt? what's happened?"

he chuckles, but it sounds thick and strained. "so many questions, baby."

you scoff. "you had me worried."

"i'm sorry, y/n."

there's something about the way he says it that twists uncomfortably inside of you, finally taking note of how strange he's sounded since you first heard him speak. he sounds strained and coarse, and there was a tinge of something else you couldn't quite pick up on.

"ignacio," you call as the worry settles back in, falling heavy on your chest. "are you okay? where are you?"

"i'm okay," he assures but his answer is a little too quick. "i'm sorry i've been gone so long. negocio, you see?"

you nod, even if he can't see it. "will you be back soon?"

this time, his answer delays. your heart sinks.

"soon," he agrees eventually. "i'm not sure."

"oh," you let out.

"i just wanted to hear your voice. i've missed you, mi amor."

"i've missed you too, nacho," you whisper, holding your phone as tight to yourself as you can; as if that'll bring nacho back. "i can't sleep without you."

"yeah?" he laughs lightly, "neither can i."

you press your lips together and hesitate on a reply. something dark and twisted sinks in on you and it makes you feel sick but you don't know what to do about it.

you don't know if there is anything you can do about it.

there's a cut over the line and you hear nacho sigh.

"i have to go, baby."

his voice thickens and cracks at the end of it.

"oh? okay..." swallowing thickly, you blink back the tears that involuntarily well in your eyes. "but you'll be home soon, right, amorcito?"

"...y-yeah."

biting your lip, you force back the sob that threatens to break past your lips.

"you promise then?" you ask, words choked.

there's a slight rustle. "i promise."

"i love you."

a pause; one that lasts for what feels like enternity before nacho replies; "....love you too, mi amor."

and he's pulling away before you can say anything else, the line cutting as you pull your phone to glance it, watching as the call ends. the sob wreckes past your lips then and you feel you sick, your stomach tight and your hands shaking as you think about the way his voice had sounded.

it occurs to you then you won't be seeing nacho again.

despite his promise.

[cerebralinvasion]

If that okay, can I please have one shot, ow yandere Ozaki Koyo who tires to stop the reader to leave mafia. The reader is tired of working for the criminals and wants to start a fresh quiet life. However, Ozaki does not want to let go of the reader, and will tries to find a way, to force the reader to stay in mafia. Gender Neutral reader is fine.

return to sender.

yandere koyo ozaki x reader.

notes: sorry for being gone so long everyone!! im backkkk

tags/warnings: yandere, brief mentions of god, threats but no violence really

the life you had chosen wasn’t an easy one. of course you had known that going in. no one joins the mafia thinking it was going to be cupcakes and rainbows. but maybe you had underestimated how brutal your life would become. or maybe you just chose to ignore it. chose to lie to yourself that it wouldn’t be all that bad, do whatever you could to make the money you desperately needed. it was difficult, of course. working by the higher ups was terrifying. you constantly feared for your life, even around those you were supposed to consider allies. you never truly felt like you fit in where you had come to find yourself. the people around you felt dangerous in a way you were not. whether they worked above you or on your level, you felt like an oddity. someone whose mind just wasn’t strong enough for this life, not the way theirs were.

there was only one person you had come to find comfort in: koyo. as an executive her position was held second only to the boss. from her status, to her fighting skills, her wits, and her supernatural ability— she was superior to you on every level. she had no business with a low-life grunt such as yourself. yet somehow, despite all odds, you managed to peak her interest. you don’t have a clue what it could have been. what you possibly could have accomplished for her to take you under her wing like she did, but it worked. you’d managed to garner her favor.

it was a lot different now than it had been when you two first interacted, all tense shoulders and short responses on your end. trying to make yourself as small as possible and avoid catching her eye. that’s changed. you wouldn’t say you had ever become at ease in her presence, however you did lose much of the initial terror. out of everyone in the mafia, you could easily say you preferred to spend your time with koyo.

but it wasn’t enough. having a single person you could semi-trust just wasn’t enough to convince you to continue like this. to continue staking your life every day for profit. putting everything you had in terrible danger and trampling your morals for some extra cash.

finding your way into the mafia had been hard, and you knew that finding your way out would be even harder. but you had to try. you refused to lay down the rest of your life for this. naturally, it’d be dangerous. but no more dangerous than engaging in shootouts on a regular basis. no more dangerous than spending your days around seasoned killers.

the plan was simple. make yourself as little of a threat as possible. you wouldn’t turn to the government or anything of that nature. you figured that if you made it clear enough that you wouldn’t be any harm they wouldn’t even bother looking for you. you know people have done it before, maybe you could be one of them. it’s not like you were a noteworthy asset. you weren’t an executive or a leader of any unit. you were just another faceless grunt. the odds that anyone would not only notice but also care were slim. you didn’t have access to highly classified information. you would make a pretty useless traitor.

on the night of your departure you worked quickly. packing everything necessary from your apartment into a rather large suitcase. you withdrew the money from your bank account and found your way to a mediocre hotel until you decided where you’d go. but just as you were preparing to settle in for the night you heard a knock on the door. it had to be near 4am, what was room service doing at this time of night?

the second you twisted the door handle you were flung back. something had hit you, hard. there was little damage, but you could already feel an aching sensation bloom along where your head and back had made contact with the wall. you looked up. there was a blade at your throat and a woman a few feet ahead of you. you dared not move. not when a literal demon held a short sword centimeters from your jugular.

“now what do we have here?” elegant as ever, koyo strode further into the room, making her way to the wall opposite the door, where you were pinned into place by the golden demon.

“koyo….” your mouth instantly dried up when you heard her voice. “how did you… find me?”

she laughed.

“did you actually expect to simply waltz out of the port mafia? you should know better. i really did think you were smarter than that… you didn’t even bother leaving the city.”

“it hasn’t even been six hours since i packed up… i got to the hotel less than an hour ago! how? how did you get here so fast?”

koyo’s movements were near serpentlike as she brought her own shortsword up to your neck, taking the golden demon’s place. the ability moved behind her in a defensive position. it floated ominously, it’s mere form acting as a barricade from the door. no one would be getting in or out until koyo removed the thing.

“you really should break this habit of underestimating the opponent. of course i found you. maybe the hope in your heart came with a heavy dose of naivety. hope that things would work out for you in a way they didn’t back with the mafia. you should know by now that god is no longer on your side, not after all you’ve done.”

your breathing stuttered. she was right. you never would have rushed into something with a plan as rudimentary as ‘just hope the enemy won’t notice’ back when you were with the mafia. only a cruel hope could produce such utter stupidity.

“still, to think you’d disappear without so much as a goodbye? not even to me?” koyo tapped the blade against the underbelly of your chin, watching as you tilted your head upward to avoid it.

“don’t… don’t kill me. please just let me go. i promise, i swear on everything, i won’t tell anyone anything. please.”

“now, you know i can’t do that, right?”

your breath quickened. was this it? the whole plan was stupid and half baked in hindsight, now it seemed you would pay for your lack of foresight with your life.

you weren’t ready to die.

“poor thing… you’re trembling. really, just how far did you think you’d make it? no offense, dear, but there’s no way someone like you could make it out of here. you’re no osamu dazai, you know? pitting yourself against the port mafia is a losing battle. you’d be crushed like a butterfly in the beak of a hawk, and wouldn’t that be unfortunate.”

“i just don’t understand… why would an executive like you be sent to fetch someone like me?”

“sent? oh no, you misunderstand. nobody sent me to come get you. in fact, no one else even knows you tried to leave, not that they wouldn’t have found out within the week... but tonight? consider this a… personal endeavor.”

you furrowed your brows. the more questions she answered the more confused you became.

koyo pulled the sword away, neatly tucking it back in it’s holster. the blade once again masqueraded as an elegant parasol. demon snow fizzled out of existence. she reached the hand not gripping the wagasa towards you. offering a hand to help you up.

“now then, let’s go home before you cause any more trouble.”

[sheinsidemymindvro]

could you explain this entire situation because im only catching bits and pieces of it

im rlly confused :/

hey, so elusin is a woman aged 26. she makes music. at the start of september last year i followed her on ig. i didn't know it yet but she is psychic and by looking at a photo of me she used her ability to connect with my brain and she can see my vision, hear my thoughts and because psychics are in ones consciousness they can also manipulate electrical currents that we use to move around (how we function) they can send pulses to your body's muscles like an electrical massage machine and make the muscles tense. they use this to annoy me and to do things like give me headaches, and constipate me. elusin is a person that acts like she is nice but is a horrible ugly person and im not the first to be the victim of her and her sister and friends psychic attacks. my blog is made to bring awareness to my experience and to out her for what she is. ive decided that i will tell people around me about what ive learnt about psychic abilities. let me know if you wanna know more about other things ive learnt, when i followed her at the time i was a listener of her music and just started to learn how to make music. it has been a year since. for the first six months she kept silent on abusing me through non verbal abilities such as stopping me from sleeping, mimicking my voice to manipulate me into thinking her whispers were my thoughts. making my body tense to try and trick my brain into thinking its anxious. after six months of that she and her companion psychics went into full psychic attack, and i get all the abuse plus i have constant verbal attacks as long as I'm awake. elusin is obsessed with trying to destroy my mental health and has changed her sleep schedule to my own. she is in norway and i am in new zealand. she is a neet who receives money from her parents and lives in one of their spare houses. that is how she is able to do this to me regarding time. my music is what has kept her around for so long. she wants to copy it, but i have made it very difficult for her by raising awareness of what she is doing to me on the internet to leave records, aswell as posting demo versions of songs. I'm only a beginner and she has been making music for ten years. it sucks that my creative journey is starting like this but i have decided to stop making music until she leaves me alone so that she has nothing to gain by remaining in my mind. i have stopped completely for the last two or three months and am just waiting this out. she constantly taunts me with immature mockery and the easiest way to describe her is that she is 26 and is extremely stupid. what has stopped me from having my mental health damaged from this is realising she is an idiot. she revealed to me her identity because she thought i wouldn't talk about it. i deal with a 12 year old in a 26 year olds body is the shortest i could put it. I'm doing ok now, i've learnt to ignore her and the worst she does to me is keep me up night so that I'm tired at work. I'm staying strong and positive and focusing on other areas of my life right now. thank you for asking me about it, i'm here to share my story and what i've learnt about human psychic abilities. it sucks that she decided to use her ability to try and break people and make their lives worse. i know there must be a lot of psychics out there, and they aren't going to be like her. the things i describe are very real and if a psychic would read them they might be interested and check it out. once they connect to your consciousness, they feel your being as if they are you, and when that happens they know your thoughts as you think. which isn't so bad. when that happens they have access to also your memories and can look through them, its like how you are able to think about your own memories and know them. this means other psychics will become aware of what she is and what she has done. I feel like if there are any other idiot psychics going on psychic attack sprees for years, people are going to become aware that psychics exist, i hope to make a place where other people that have gone through similar experiences can talk.

[that-one-gay-aew-enthusiast]

𝙵𝚒𝚗𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚢 - 𝙰𝚍𝚊𝚖 '𝙵𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚔' 𝙱𝚊𝚛𝚛𝚎𝚝

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Warnings: Readers low self confidence shows, self doubt, edging, shower sex, size differance, overstimulation, biting, blood, groping, vaginal sex, praise, marking, teasing, body worship, Frank being a soft dom, pet names, hints of possessiveness, fingering,

Word count: 1.9k

Genre: smut, angst

Summary: You and Frank finally get to fuck after a long 24 hours of being cut off

Pairings: Plussize!reader x Vampire!Frank

A/n: This is part two of soft spot, so if you havent already read that, make sure you've got an spair hour and prepare yourself and go read it, if you have read soft spot, enjoy the (as promised) smut without plot, im calling part 2 :)

Proof read?: Yes

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Taglist: @fizzyfazzy420 @creelkobblelaufeyson69 @lilyevans1 @bizarrescribblez @endofradio @reclaimedbythesea @joviewinchester @hesawifebeaterdanusethegun

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Despite how horny you and Frank were, you both were also, very, very filthy. You both made your way to the room he had set up in a few hours prior, and into it's bathroom. Frank fiddled the shower for a minute, before a satisfying hiss of water shot out the shower head onto the marble floor. He turned and smiled at you, before starting to peel off his blood soaked clothes. You took your jacket and shoes off but hesitated when it got to the rest of your outfit. You had an underlying fear that you would remove your clothes and suddenly Frank would change his mind. The thing was you always wore clothes that could disguise your body to look more "attractive" than it actually was.

Whilst you got yourself mentally tangled up in worrying about what Frank would think, he on the other hand was now down to his boxers, before he glanced over at you and saw you looking at your body in the reflection of the mirror and frowned. "Y/n? You alright, sweetheart?" You blinked yourself back into reality and looked over at Frank. "Uh yeah, just thinking about something." Frank took notice that you still didn't attempt to reach for your clothes, and quickly pieced the puzzle together.

Frank lifted you onto the bathroom counter and held your hands. "Baby I can see your nervous about me seeing your body, but trust me, I've already envisioned what you look like under this fabric and I'm sure you'll still impress me." You looked up into his eyes and saw only sincerity, making you smile and pull your shirt over your head, followed by your jeans being pulled off your legs. You stepped down onto the tiled floor and removed your bra and panties, leaving you bare in front of Frank who, by now, was just staring at you in awe. You looked so gorgeous to him, so bare yet so covered in blood, Frank just wanted to stare at you for eternity. But at the same time, Frank had been waiting all night to fuck you and this wasn't doing his aching cock any favours.

You both stepped into the shower and you hummed happily, closing your eyes as the stream of water hit your filthy skin. You let out a sigh of relief and ran your fingers through your hair. Soon enough you felt Frank's arms wrap around you and hold you against him. "This better angel?" You nodded and hummed contently, before starting to scrub yourself. As you started to become clean, Frank's hands started to move from hips, slowly sliding to other parts of your body. First his hands made to your breasts, cupping them and rubbing his thumb over your erect nipples. You tried to ignore the sweet sensation and focus on finishing washing yourself, but that was much easier said than done.

By some miracle you managed to get decently clean before you started to buckle slightly. Frank had his chin on your shoulder and was watching your face for a reaction, when he didn't get one, he started to move his hands down your stomach and over your thighs. This was when your confidence started to waver, you tensed up slightly and stopped scrubbing yourself. Frank smirked to himself and started pressing sloppy kisses to your jawline. Your breathing started to hitch and catch, as one of his hands gripped one of your thighs and pulled it slightly outwards, before his second hand slid between the gap and tapped your clit. Feeling your legs grow weak, you quickly put the sponge back down and gripped onto Franks larger arms

"You alright there my angel?" God his tone was so innocent and guilty at the same time. You nodded digging your nails into his arms gently. Frank chuckled and went back to kissing your neck. His fingers now started to rub small circles on your clit, you could already feel your orgasm starting to build. You tipped your head back slightly and whimpered quietly, wanting to release to arrive quicker. Frank's fingers started to move quicker and quicker, you were so sure that you were gonna make a mess of his fingers, but yet right as you were gonna hit your climax......nothing? You opened your eyes and turned round and looked up at frank, who was just towerring over you with a shit-eating grin plastered across his lips. "If your done, i'd like to shower now myself princess?" You pouted and stepped past him out of the shower, smug bastard.

Once out the shower, you grabbed a towel and dried off, making your way back into the bedroom. You sat on the bed and hummed, thinking about nothing in particular aside from the events of the previous 24 hours. After a few minutes you heard the shower go quiet, averting your attention to the bathroom door. Frank appeared in the doorway smiling with a towel round his waist. Small beads of water dripped from a few loose strands of hair which had fallen foward as he stepped into the room. You were still pouting from earlier and continued to, showing your disaproval of his teasing.

"Awwww whats wrong Pumpkin? Your all pouty and we don't want a pouty girl now do we?" You huffed at him and turned your head away, however Frank quickly to that. He gripped your jaw and got you to look up at him, his blue eyes piercing into your doe ones. "If you want me to fuck you angel, all you have to do is ask nicely." You felt your face heat up before stuttering out "Please Frank, please i need to feel you." He smiled and leaned down, pressing his lips agaisnt yours and pushing you to lay down on the bed. You wrapped your arms round Frank's neck, holding him agaisnt you as he slipped his tounge into your mouth.

Soon enough you felt one of Frank's hands cupping your breasts while the other cupped your cheek. Slowly you moved a hand from round his neck, down to where the towel was sat round his waist and tugged it loose so that it fell onto the bed. Frank did the same to your towel and tossed it behind him before lowering his mouth to your neck. You ran your fingers through his hair and wrapped your legs round his waist, pushing his hips towards yours. Frank pulled back his head and looked into your eyes as he lined himself up. You still hadn't actually seen his cock, but from the bulge you'd seen in his trousers, you certainly weren't worried about being disapointed.

"I'll go slow alright angel?" You nodded before gasping and wincing slightly at the stretch. Frank's hand intertwined with yours as he slowly pushed the rest of himself in. After a minute of him stopping and letting you adjust until Frank had bottomed out, you sighed and relaxed slightly. You bit your lip and pulled Frank's head down to yours, moaning into his mouth as he kissed you. "Please just move Frank." He chuckled against your lips and started to move his hips round. Your arms clung round his neck tightly, your nails starting to dig into his shoulder blades.

For the most part Frank was quiet, letting out the occasional grunt, you were not quiet. You moaned his name quite loudly, it was a good thing the house was quite isolated. You quickly felt your climax building again, and before you could say anything to Frank, it hit you like a train. But he didn't stop thrusting, oh no, Frank wanted to feel it again. Frank's lips moved down to your neck and sucked on it, leaving a couple purple marks. Frank was going to move down and leave some marks on your chest, aswell until he got the scent of your arousal. To him it was intoxicating, better than any drug he could ever take, it made him......feral. For a moment Frank's mind went hazy, the only thing in his head was tasting you.

Thats when you felt a sharp stab in your neck, causing you to let out a small yelp. You cast your eyes downwards to see Franks lips planted on your neck as his teeth pierced your neck. You felt the warm trickles of blood seep down onto your chest and pool round your breasts. You managed to weakly mutter out Frank's name which broke his trance, making him pull back and look down at the artwork he had just made. "I'm sorry angel, you just smelt so good, i must say though, red really is your colour." Frank smirked down at you and continued to move his hips, making you blush and pull him down into a kiss.

You quickly got the sickening taste of your own coppery blood off of Frank's tounge. His hands moved to your breasts and squeezed them gently, smearing the blood round on them. He started to mumble blood-drunk compliments against your lips. "I'm so glad i found you angel."

"Your so fucking gorgeous. I love your body so much, your just carved to perfection."

"I just want to keep you for all eternity."

You dug your nails into Frank's back feeling your second orgasm quickly building. Once again you came onto Frank's cock, your legs shaking as you did. After a second orgasm you expected Frank to stop, he had other ideas. "Frank, im too sensitive." He looked into your eyes and shook his head. "C'mon angel, i know youve got one more in you ." You shook your head and cried out as he found your sweet spot. As Frank sped up, you felt that familiar feeling in your stomach once more. To get you there quicker, Frank's hand slid down between your bodies, and rubbed small circles on your clit. That tipped you over the edge and caused your strongest orgasm of the night. Your vision went white as your cried out and gripped onto Frank tightly.

Frank cursed under his breath, pulled out and came onto your stomach. You slowly caught your breath and opened your eyes, looking up at Frank with cloudly eyes. He smiled softly and held your hand. "You ok sweetheart? I know that was a bit intense." You nodded and winced, remebering the wound on your neck. You rasied your fingers to your neck and touched it, the wound thankfully feel that big or deep. "I think i might anohter shower now though." You referenced the mix of your blood and Frank's cum on your chest. He smirked and simply leaned down, slowly licking a stripe up your chest. You giggled lightly at the feeling, and playfully pushed his head off of you. "Now i definetly need a shower idiot." Frank sarcastically gasped and placed his hand on his chest as if he was offended, before scooping you up and carrying you to the bathroom. "How about i join you then angel?" You looked into his eyes smiling, thinking only one thing, "this is gonna be a long night."

[mdverse]

hi!! i feel like you may have talked about this before but out of curiosity, could you explain/talk about your kurt’s tattoos? :3

hi yes ofc i would love to!! i did in fact talk about it ages ago but i am always happy to say more and u picked a great time to ask bc i've been reworking all of the vb au tats so this isn't just a repeat of my previous post about it (except i never finished my official redesign of kurt's sleeve yet so i can't actually show u my reference)

for his sleeve i went the floral route with flowers that represent the most important relationships in his life, so it's intertwined ivy leaves and forget-me-nots wrapping around his arm (whether or not they actually look like the flowers they're supposed to be is a whole other thing lmao i think i get sloppier the more i draw them)

ivy symbolises fidelity, marriage and friendship - obviously u have to ignore the marriage part here bc this one is for finn and santana (furtana best friends and siblings fr <3)

forget-me-nots symbolise true love and respect, as well as the promise that u will always keep someone in ur thoughts - i always see this one as being primarily for his mom, but i think it probably does eventually extend to the entire hudmelpez clan

i also originally gave him a lil sun on his forearm for burt as a lil nod to you are the sunshine of my life gcv, which is kinda visible in some of the older drawings that have his tattoo but. i recently realised that i chose a really stupid placement for it so im gonna move the sun to his shoulder once i actually update my reference sheets. that being said i am realising right now that i still included the sun on his forearm in yesterday's post and that's devastating to me personally so pls pretend it's not there

and then the newest addition to kurt's tattoos is a very "u have to know where to look for it otherwise i think it's easy to miss it" but i did slip it into yesterday's post so! furtana matching tattoos my beloved let's talk about that one too <33

i think that things are extremely tense between furtana during the earlier stages of burt and carole's relationship (especially between kurt and the other 2) (not gonna really get into this rn bc it's not super relevant lol) so to me they do end up connecting over music and it remains a really important common interest for them over time despite their different tastes (in the sense that like. idk i think as duos they have more interests in common but as a trio they probably don't so music is a big thing for them) (i wish i could articulate this better but hopefully u get it) etc etc so. had to sit down and imagine what each of them drawing an eigth note would look like based on their handwriting (as one does i guess?) and then i figured it would be neat if they each had all 3 notes instead of just the one they drew so. matching tats for the siblings :)

(here's part of my unfinished reference sheet for that lol i think i still need to adjust stuff for the size/placement of finn's and santana's but kurt's is already figured out) (for artistic purposes i did actually change it from my original placement, which was closer to his ear) (i just wanted it to be a bit more visible in drawings lol)

[patchwork-artists]

Ok, them meeting Bendy’s original? 4’8 adult (IM Bendy) meets his 3’0 adult original counterpart (OG/BATDRBendy) (or if you see him as a child. I personally see him as an adult since he’s just the ink Demon in a smaller more cuter ‘innocent’ form.)

Also I like how you break into hyperfication because same LMAO!

oh dude brainy is gonna kill me over this one i gotta move carefully

but. i have a funny vision over BATDR bendy in the same way i have a funny vision over boris seeing sarah in his head (*points* theyre just like me(they're not). im joking of course, i dont hc either of them to have did or anything of the like, but it does mean i see them from a system perspective and i can't help but see this dangerous beast demon suddenly switch into a small vunerable child with a completely different personaly and not think about system littles even if i don't see him having did in the slightest

now. as to how im bendy would react, ignoring the entire "wtf you're me(existential crisis)" part i thiiink. i think it could be somewhere between very stressful and very familiar to im bendy. im bendy is someone who finds his comfortzone at the simplicity of being an older brother, he naturally cares about other people and if someone that is young and needs help comes to him he's going to be kinder he's going to be gentle he raised himself to be this person that toom care of an entire other child while he himself was a child so it comes as naturally as breathing! but the moment this harmless form turns into that beast with that raspy voice and this personally of projecting his own insecurities onto others, bendy's going to be familiar in a bad way because this is absolutely the kind of thing this quest would put him through, either pre labyrithn or post labyrithn he's gonna be tense and attentive and aware of this threat but post labyrithn bendy is going to react more badly because he did get more skilled at self defense fighting in there buuuut he also got thrice as much trauma and self doubt and that ink beast is definitely gonna manage to hit that oneee sensitive spot of "you're a monster just like me".

but i personally prefer to consider more pre-labyrithn bendy for personal reasons, or at least if i'm considering post-labyrithn bendy i'd rather think about how my partner(whatsafelony on ao3 and on the ima/ims) would characterize him because his characterization of him is 👌mwah(if you read the @inkymysteryanimatedpilot 's script the characterizations were heavily changed both because we had a time limit and because he was the one writing, and God did his little changes add charm. never forget the "[clocks in]at least im being paid to argue" line that he added saying "thats something i do on my own job and very bendy coded i need to make him say that"). and i don't think he'd write bendy's guilt this way at all. i can't say for certain how fel would characterize bendy reacting to this conflict, not only because fel is an absolute genius but also because even if i did know i'd just rather let him say it on his own terms. but i think fel's bendy's interaction with both "harmless baby bendy" and "beast/ink demon" would be a tad more complex and messy and honestly human. fel's writing <333333(sorry for being biased i am. homosexual)

[dogtiber]

.

hello I am having a dog thought overwhelm today and also a general overwhelm woo please feel free to ignore me I am just working out some feelings

I feel like I haven’t been doing much with Tiber lately just because there’s so much going on rn

my to do list is miles long today too and will be for a while until I work my way through everything I need to do

but I feel BadTM about it. partner has been getting frustrated with us lately because it feels like his separation anxiety has backslid a little

(we let him sleep on the couch with us for a few nights because with Things Going On we were too stressed to deal with getting up/his whining, so we just let him stay with us to prevent it altogether. but now he seems more Upset than usual about being put to bed in his crate. it was likely not the smartest move but when we’re both tired and I’m disabled-exhausted and he’s getting-up-at-1am-for-work-several-days-in-a-row-exhausted we were kind of at the end of our rope for a bit)

but I am so sleepy and so tired right now but it is nearly impossible to catch up on the rest I need with Puppy.

we sent him to daycare on Sunday to give us some time to catch up on house work/get him some dog socialization time, but like even then. we spent the whole time cleaning the house, not resting.

we’re managing but I am becoming Increasingly Distressed about it and it is fine and we will get through it but bleegghggrrrgh

I really want to do more reading/research on dog training and esp on separation anxiety (since that’s our biggest problem with him rn) ((but also ADHD brain is getting overwhelmed and is having trouble focusing on that because there’s SO MANY important things we need to work on him right now too. like recall. oh my god his recall training has been going so bad. well like not *bad* but he is not really getting it at all. and I’m starting to feel like I need to change up our approach…but that requires reading and learning about different ones…which brings us back to…)) but because im so TIRED I just don’t have the brainpower to focus on that.

I think I’m extra emotionally distressed because partner and I had a tense upset moment yesterday. I didn’t really take Tiber out after his morning walk because he was asleep most of the day and wasn’t asking, or even eating or drinking much, too busy sleeping (I assume being tired from daycare the previous day) and when partner went to take him out, Tiber I guess couldn’t hold it and peed by the front door while he was getting his gloves on. which. was my fault for sure. I should have taken him out even if he wasn’t indicating he needed to go. but *I* wanted to nap too. so I just slept while Tiber slept and let us keep napping. and partner, after a long day at work, was extra frustrated and upset.

and it’s fine and we talked through the outburst and cleaned up and made up. but I’m on edge a little after it. just RSD kicking in I think. but still emotionally draining.

and the other day, partner asked if I could spend more time on the dog training at home, and worry less about household chores and that he’d take over more of that responsibility instead but I personally just don’t feel like this is going to be an effective solution?

(a lot of this is because our approaches dog training are…different. he just hasn’t had as much time to do training research because his job is busy, and that plus his prior childhood experiences with raising pets was…I would say less than ideal. his parents’ attitudes towards raising animals were/are. uh. questionable at best if not outright bad. (I constantly want to kidnap their cat she is having such a bad time over there.) so him trying to take over Tiber Time to give me a break and some rest time usually ends up with me involved anyway, because I’m trying to gently nudge him from doing things that might be aversive (gentle stuff, he’s not kicking the dog or anything, but I don’t super love his first line approach being to tug firmly away from things he shouldn’t have instead of trying to call or redirect attention first, for example. obviously sometimes just grabbing him is necessary if there’s a danger but like. if it’s a sock on the ground outside or whatever) or from asking Tiber for too much and not really getting the idea of setting him up for success, or trying to pair a cue without Tiber having learned the behavior first. and none of this is the end of the world but like. I don’t want to have to change a cue because it was poisoned or unteach a bad habit or counter condition something he taught. and maybe this is my control issues coming into play but like I also think it’s important to set Tiber up for as much success as possible.)

((but also like. I’m a little frustrated also that he’d rather change around how our household works than to just. sit down and watch the videos/read the articles I send him.))

((I also get frustrated because sometimes the thing I need help with most is just staying with Tiber while I go downstairs to tidy up or take a shower or whatever. but he wants to go up to the loft to game and I don’t begrudge him this because it’s how he unwinds and also spends time with his brother, but when he does I get limited to upstairs with Tiber and can’t get anything done elsewhere.))

it’s been double hard lately because of Tiber’s vomiting and tummy troubles. vet has him on just his kibble and has allowed some plain boiled chicken for treats while we’re working out what’s up, but that means I can’t give as many options for kongs or longer lasting chews or whatever to keep him busy.

so even if I had “more time” to work with the dog, I can’t dog train all day, and I still have to watch him between sessions so he doesn’t puppy chew the house apart. and I can’t distract and occupy him as well right now without access to high value treats and likis and things. (he won’t really work for his kibble unless he’s *really* hungry and I’m not interested in starving him for the sake of some peace.) me doing chores is not really the problem I just need help watching the dog. and also a nap.

also this has reminded me that we’re out of chicken to boil so I need to get more because we have literally no treats for Tiber in this house rn.

and it’s fine and we’ll see how things go for a while first but I desperately need some quality sleep and rest to be able to actually functionally tackle anything right now and that’s just not happening currently. 🙃

and as my to do list gets longer ADHD brain wants to go more and more off the rails.

and I am just feeling dejected and overwhelmed and like I’m not enough.

bleh. I should get breakfast that’s probably where I should start. and then maybe try to grocery delivery some chicken for Tiber? I’d rather go down to the butcher but tbh I think I’m too tired for that long of a walk rn (even if it’s only 5 mins. I tired.)

I need hand holding and someone to start me on tasks man. girl help my executives are dysfunctioning.

[whumpsoda]

Thinking about Nevan having a happy ending is great and all but like. Imagine.

Genevieve and Nevan finally setting up a reunion date after Malak's continued attempts to reassure Gen that he wasn't lying. They're both pretty giddy, Nevan thinks that he'll be able to regain all his memories and he won't feel empty anymore.

They meet, Gen obviously doesn't Amara the first time because stranger danger and all. There's hugging, a whole lot of tears from Genevieve, but Nevan can't feel anything but nervous. He still feels that longing, and the memories don't come flooding back like he thought they would.

And Gen can tell he's changed. He's different, and not the same man she'd dreamed of dating. As much as she'd like to just ignore the alien feeling she now gets looking at him, Gen can tell he's just as apprehensive.

She keeps in contact, brings him to meet his daughter, but it's not the same. And it won't be. So they don't make it work, as much as it hurts both of them. The only positive they get from it is closure, something they wouldn't have gotten without meeting again.

Anyway, sorry for all that. It's great having someone else's blorbos running around my head, thanks again lmao. One day I'll get that rent

Okay tbh I kinda like this more… I can’t let him have a completely happy ending >:)

I do like the idea of both of their expectations not being met when they actually meet. Nevan thinks he’s going to remember stuff as soon as he sees her, and that just doesn’t happen. Genevieve thinks shes going to get her boyfriend back all still the same as the day he left, and that’s far from the truth as well.

And Genevieve can still tell him all about stuff between them and his past, but it’s just not the same as actually remembering it. It feels sort of artificial in a way?

And GOD I love the idea of both of them having that alien feeling seeing each other, seeing someone they each have a deep past with but it still feels like they’re sitting with a stranger. I just know both goes home and cries >:)

Also I love the idea of Nevan actually meeting Amara, but you KNOW its gonna be awkward as hell. And he just feels terrible seeing her, and she’s kinda just like who is this guy?? And the meeting would just be very tense.

BUT AGH IT NOT WORKING OUT and they both are forced to accept it just doesn’t feel right, and I’d think that after a while they’d just grow apart and not keep in touch at all. It just hurts too much :( and Nevan would definitely feel guilty for like ruining her perception of him, like he could’ve let her remember him as someone so cool, and now she’ll always remember him as being weak and pathetic…

ANYWAY IM HAPPY YOUR ALLOWING MY OCS TO RUN WILD IN YOUR HEAD… :3

[we-are-inevitable]

Fully just harassing you with asks rn so you can pick and choose which ones to ignore

Thoughts on Davey and Finch friendship?

-guess

this is so old im sorry ily @roideny

it doesn’t mesh, not at first.

i feel like theyre both very headstrong and have a lot of thoughts and opinions that they share out loud often, and because of that, things can be a little tense. their first meeting probably doesn’t go super well; davey probably says something finch doesn’t agree with, and finch is not a “three strikes and you’re out” kind of person; davey says something wrong, and finch hates him full stop. and because finch hates davey, davey hates finch.

so things are kind of not great for a little bit! they’re always hanging out together because davey and jack are dating and jack and race are best friends and race and finch are also best friends, so group things are a little weird, but as long as they don’t like. interact with each other, it’s fine.

it’s also a case of them both just being so similar. they’re stubborn and headstrong like i said earlier, but also fiercely loyal and not afraid to speak their minds. they care deeply about what’s right vs. wrong and aren’t fond of change- though davey embraces it much sooner than finch- and they both care a lot about how their words and actions come across to other people. its like a ,, same side of different coins kind of thing (and yes i know thats not the saying but think about it for a minute)

i think what brings them together is probably just,, an issue with their friends? idk. something they have to work together to actively solve- it’s not really a “hey i’ve grown as a person and you’re not bad, lets be friends” kind of thing but they have a mutual respect for each other because they figured something out together.

the friendship is still iffy at times but they eventually learn to live with it! it might take a year before they have any inside jokes or common interests to talk about, but they get there!

also hi el ilysm

[pepper-steam-milkshake]

can't sleep tonight, so this is what came out of it. i still find it hilarious that aya is literally just,,, carrying bram stoker around on her back. SHES LITERALLY TEN HELP

on the other hand this is actually hilarious ignoring the high stakes. just this ten year old walking around the airport with bram "dracula" stoker on her back, somehow a backpack (HOW DID SHE DO THIS) with a sword stuck through him???? she goes to security and they dead ass go,,, "you can't take that in there :'))))"

she glares like "bitch he's not a that!!!! also it's not his fault he cant walk, some asshole cut his legs off" (fukuchi)

all im saying is that while this arc will be very tense once it's animated, it's gonna be SO FUNNY

also side-eyeing the current season. there's no WAY we're finishing the current arc within the season and that makes me worried. the current options from my pov are:

they add more episodes (probably the best solution imo)

they cut content out (NO, they already took so much of sigma's stuff out :( )

they stop the season near the end of the arc (not ideal, but it means they're still going to give it the time it deserves)

they do stop the season near the end of the arc... and almost immediately start the next one without a flashback arc (doubtful and highly unlikely)

losing my mind

also if i did not tag spoilers correctly for bsd please let me know so i can change and fix it! im fairly new to all this but i dont want to accidentally spoil anyone :')

[tmrmary]

broadmoored​:

party crashers | danicamp + jowards

Asha was going to suggest that they move closer onto the dance floor to keep a better eye on Scamp and Danica, but when Junior spoke, she looked up and realized he seemed to be frozen in place, stunned at the sight before them. She took a deep breath when she realized with his first few words alone that her friend was spiraling. Being one of 12 siblings in a massively blended family, Asha knew what it was like to watch chaos reign down in the lives of people she felt responsible for, people she felt a natural impulse to mother into making the right choices at all times. It was also a very quick lesson to find out she couldn’t be in control of it all and had to let some lessons be learned the hard way. But for Junior, who seemed to even now be working towards finding his footing in his relationship with his sisters, she could see the blatant lack of the lesson learned- a lack of willingness even. 

Asha listened to Junior ramble on, watched his reactions become physical and eventually brought a hand to his upper arm to settle it back where it belonged. It took a beat for her to shake off how utterly good he looked and sounded in this state of frazzled that she normally didn’t see him in but that was certainly beside the point. She opened her mouth to interject but it seemed he wasn’t done and Asha always waited until he was done.

“We can Accio your wand, Vic,” she told him gently, first and foremost tackling the directly solvable problem at hand. “And if you can’t, I can. Just let me know if you want me to.” A subtle reminder that he didn’t have to be alone in his spiraling, paired with a slight squeeze to his arm. “And you are their older brother, but they’re also adults. I know you feel like you have to protect them from every single thing that can hurt them but sometimes all you can do is make sure they’re alive and functional and call it a day.” Asha waved a hand vaguely in Danica’s direction as she said this.

She took a breath and made sure Junior was still listening before she continued. “Sloane left Amy’s party just before we did, she took off and I don’t know where she went. But she’s smart and she’s clever and if nothing else she’s frickin fierce- both your sisters are.” Asha waited until Junior met her eyes before going on, “They’re going to be okay. And just like I couldn’t help you till you asked, you can’t help them till they ask either. Okay?” Her gaze was so very earnest on his as she ran a soothing hand down his arm. “You don’t have to force yourself to have fun tonight if this totally put a damper on things. I didn’t want that for you when I asked Danica if she wanted to come over, just wanted to get her some place surrounded by familiar faces that she could maybe take her mind off of things. But we can keep an eye on her from afar all night if that makes you feel better. That’s all though. If she wants to solve whatever is going on by herself, we have to let her.”

Junior had asked and Asha delivered in the most honest way she could. Now, holding his arm as she had been all night, leaning against him in the most intimate manner two people so comfortable could be, she gazed up at him, waiting for confirmation that he understood, that he was willing to take a breath or in the least, go down a distressful rabbit hole together. 

Scamp was otherwise preoccupied with the heat bubbling within him, in front of him and in each space in between. “I never said anything about leaving altogether,” he corrected, the sly smirk always playing on his lips as he worked out his mannerisms with her like moves on a chess board. “But I see where your mind is now.” He allowed a chuckle to tremor past his throat, dipping low so she could feel it just as well as she could hear it, “I just thought it would be more decent to put my hands on you the way I wanted away from prying eyes. But if you want to put on a show for these drunken primates, so be it.”

Scamp’s eyes narrowed, but only a hair when his hands were redirected. The shift was nearly imperceptible, but there he was, noticing acutely that what was an intimate gesture was moved to be a more sultry one. He chose not to read into it. Scamp didn’t respond her question verbally, just ran a large, firm hand up her hip, along her side. His mouth dropped from hers to her jaw, then to the length of her neck, smelling so sweetly and uniquely of her. His answer to what she said was a low rumble escaping his lips, indicative of nothing and everything all at once.

Feeling Asha’s hold on his arm, just as the hold she had on his peace and well-being, let Junior reconnect with his breath. His throat swallowing in a moment to clear his throat, as well as his mind. He had found some sort of center even through the slight spiral of intoxication. And so, he assured Asha about his wand. “No, no need.” He moved into with the smallest reactive lean, stating plainly with half crooked up corner of his mouth. “You’re right.” Junior wasn’t yet convinced his sisters were out of the clear just yet... but he understood what was the right thing he needed to do. After all, he couldn’t solve all their problems. Otherwise, were they ever truly solved? No, he would wait until they asked - and if that moment ever came, he wouldn’t hesitate for even a second.

Junior nodded, more so still for himself than to notify Asha of his agreement with her advice. He remembered why they had made it onto the dance floor in the first place. Thinking out loud, his gaze wandered around the crowd, head turning from side to side as he muttered. “I should make the most of the night. We still need to find the guys.” A puff of breath let out in an exhale. as he wore his usual goofy smile. “It’s still my bachelor party, right?” He should make the most of it. And he was going to try exactly that. In immediate impulse, Junior slipped out of her hold just to wrap his big arm around from her the back, and in one fair swoop, he had brought her petite body in to squeeze the heck out of her side for a surprise hug. His cheerfulness emanating from his soul as he kissed her forehead in button. 

Junior gazed into Asha’s eyes and in that honest, delicately charming tone he held in his voice whenever he spoke with sincere gratitude, he said, “Thank you.” Thinking he had seen his buddy Tahir off in the distance, Junior cut off that moment to let go of his best friend and signaled her over with the bob of a head. “Come on.” Junior stuck his hands back in his pockets as made his way to their next stop. As they maneuvered through the crowd, Junior was sure that where he met up with his three favorite apes was a destination near enough to Danica and Scamp. They inched closer to the dance floor to keep a good eye on them, but still keeping in mind what Asha said about giving them their space. But also giving space for themselves - Junior was there to enjoy this night with the people he cared about more than anything in the world. Asha, his friends, and himself deserved it just as much.

On the contrary to her brother, it was long now that Danica had paid any attention to the thought of him. She was too enamored with the moment of feeling Scamp’s kisses trail down her neck - the sound of his reverberating growl echoing like thunder in the spaces of her mind. “What’s fun about being decent?” Her exasperated words purred from her lips. Before he could get too far, it was Danica’s turn to bait, turning her back onto his chest just after taking his hands and interlocking fingers with her own. With their hands clamped, she took and wrapped her own torso with Scamp’s augmented arms, practically enveloped in a blanket of his much larger physique. Her dainty figure in comparison grinded against him, letting the music’s beats dictate the rhythm of her body pressing against his. Her senses all fading as they came down to the physical touch. His touch. Her fingers slowly letting go with the joint of his, now just placed over his wrists as she suggestively guided where his touch would go. Every push back, every caress, every breath bringing the feeling of utter euphoria. 

After a few minutes or so, curious mischief tickled her to turn around, locking back into his embrace only to match up with his gaze. Looking up at him, her pout was full as ever, but impotent in holding back her smirk. “We do put on a pretty good show.” Danica’s inhibitions exhaled out of her, as she began to sink into their dancing once again, syncing up their movements as if they were the waves of a forming current. However, this time there was no motive behind it. This moment she had left to enjoy it for herself. To enjoy him. Her fingers steadily reached back up to pin down his pecks. For the first time, she didn’t feel herself reaching to play with his tie. For the first time, she was finding herself to break their stare to see who could possibly make the first one blush. Instead, she found herself loosing herself to his embrace again, closing her eyes as she placed her forehead against his chest. She could feel herself growing attached to his body, as if in their closeness she’d become an extension of him, and in turn, her. 

Time was relative, and what felt like few, brief moments selfishly poached for each other’s intimacy possibly could’ve been as long as thirty minutes - maybe longer. Danica paid no attention to it. As her hands unknowingly melted down to Scamp’s backside and her face shifted to its side, still pressing on his chest, she was able to spot Junior from her corner peripheral. He wasn’t too far off in the distance, as she could steal glimpses of him and who he was with in between the shapes of the people next to Danica and Scamp. Her brother in that moment seemed so happy and elated. His guard completely down, goofy as ever, with the blissful sparkle in his eyes as he foolishly danced to the same music she was listening to. Even scream-singing the songs back to the faces of those he kept for company, most specifically the witch who had accompanied Danica here. She hadn’t even questioned the fact that she’d never seen Junior so free out of his own head before. And how Asha so effortlessly brought out that side out of him. She was jealous of him. Jealous of her. Jealous of people like that... not just Asha. 

Was she really jealous? Jealous of her dopey brother? How could she? What was weighing her down? And that time period of peace, where she actually enjoyed being the accessory to someone’s existence again, shifted. The echoes sifting through her tricky subconscious creepily snuck up on her to ring:

“He doesn’t deserve to be dragged into this mess-”

Her breath clenched in a split second. This was unexpected for Danica - a surprise she had imagined to retain these words from her older brother at all. Her chest hurt as if the organ laying in the center of her anatomy had sunken deep into the pits of Danica’s soul. With her breath at a loss, she felt herself having to purposefully pay attention to her respiration, as if not to forget to do it. She searched in the deep chasms of her mind to make sense of why this phrased bothered her so much. Of course, she was petty and being called a mess vexed her like nothing other. But this annoyance wasn’t about that. Or rather, it wasn’t an annoyance at all... it resembled more so of a feeling of concern - of guilt - of fear. That Junior’s words actually held a ringing of truth in them. Scamp did not deserve to be in the middle of whatever this was. Her embrace on Scamp tightened, truly only slightly enough to enclose whatever was left of space between their bodies, but in her mind, the hold felt more like a constricting grip unwitting to let him go... It was if she deeply cared about him?

“-if that’s all that you’re using him for.”

Those words felt dirty. The truth of her beginning intentions for this arrangement looming on her like the shadows of rain clouds rung in by the early thunder. Knowing that for any second if he really knew how this all started out, she’d loose him. She was convinced of it. People had left her for much less. It didn’t matter if she’d grown to care about him... to like him. To desire to know him beyond just one night of fanciful fun and greedy pleasure.

And so, for the first time in her life, the contemplation of loosing the attachment she had grown for a man she’d only really known for almost two months, letting her guard down for what felt like brief, stolen moments, physically made her sick.

“If she were to find out-”

She stopped. She couldn’t think anymore. Danica began to notice that her fading senses were actually consequence of the alcohol intoxication and not of the Broadmoor she clung to. Her vision growing blurry her with every passing moment. She slipped out of his embrace, now looking at the ground below her feet. Her right hand coming up for her palm to pinch against her temple, reactively muttering, “Shit- I need another drink.” Danica didn’t even spend a moment to hesitate, as she walked from their spot away from the dance floor. A passing half-giant waiter - who had such an immense and eccentric stature - held a similar looking tray from the previous waiters. This posed opportunity for Danica to walk up to them and grab with each free hand two more shots, downing them so quick, giving her no time to react and comment to the odd-looking club lackey.

Her face drew a very blatant pout of unadulterated disgust, as she was expecting the taste of gigglewater and it completely proving to be the opposite. The bitter taste burning down her throat reminded her that just as she had expected for this to be a familiar drink, the same could be said for her lack of judgement with the Broadmoor. Maybe Danica was feeling that she was growing too comfortable.