#ALL IT HAD TO DO WAS FOLLOW IT
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I hate when nothing goes as planned
#I HAD A PLAN#ALL IT HAD TO DO WAS FOLLOW IT#BUT NOOOO#upset? maybe perhaps#just a tad#the vibe speaks
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a redraw of the first drawing i posted here to celebrate the fact that ive been in tumblr for more than a whole year posting my shit and havent deleted my blog in panic yippee \:D/ (mushy rant in tags)
#i realised too late that it has been more than a fuking year (august 9)#and for context: ive had 3 different intagram art accounts and i deleted all 3 of them a few months before creating them. anxiety amiright#here it has been so different bc people are so nice??? it has been a pretty plesant experience here w all of u really#im so glad to have found myself in such a wonderful part of the fandom and amazing mutuals that i never talk to bc im shit w texting#the atention has been overwhelming ngl. i have over 2000 followers which. holy fuck???#it doesnt feel like a real number and for my own sake im nnot gonna treat it as one#like i apreciate the support and ppl liking what i do but im not here to make number go big yk? im here to connect w other humans#and yall have been amazing humans ^^ thank u for all the wonderful tags and comments and the support overall#it has been so cool sharing my art and finding other artist whom i respect oh so very much. some of them even follow me back wtf#i hope to continue being here for as long as i can and keep growing as an artist and sharing that process with other without fear#also my amy redesign actually goes so hard idk why i forgot about it nxnfbcncb#sth#sonic fanart#sonic#amy rose#nov.aart#nov.junk
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they want to talk about mental illness and acceptance and how everyone is a little ocd it's cute and quirky and their "intrusive thoughts" are about cutting their hair off and you say yours are about taking a razorblade to your eye and they say ew can you not and everyone is a little adhd sometimes! except if you're late it's a personality flaw and it's because you are careless and cruel (and someone else with adhd mentions they can be on time, so why can't you?) and it's not an eating disorder if it's girl dinner! it's not mania if it's girl math! what do you mean you blew all of your savings on nonrefundable plane tickets for a plane you didn't even end up taking. what do you mean that you are afraid of eating. get over it. they roll their little lips up into a sneer. can you not, like, trauma dump?
they love it on them they like to wear pieces of your suffering like jewels so that it hangs off their tongue in rapiers. they are allowed to arm-chair diagnose and cherrypick their poisons but you can't ever miss too many showers because that's, like, "fuckken gross?" so anyone mean is a narcissist. so anyone with visual tics is clearly faking it and is so cringe. but they get to scream and hit customer service employees because well, i got overwhelmed.
you keep seeing these posts about how people pleasers are "inherently manipulative" and how it's totally unfair behavior. but you are a people pleaser, you have an ingrained fawn response. in the comments, you have typed and deleted the words just because it is technically true does not make it an empathetic or kind reading of the reaction about one million times. it is technically accurate, after all. you think of catholic guilt, how sometimes you feel bad when doing a good deed because the sense of pride you get from acting kind - that pride is a sin. the word "manipulation" is not without bias or stigma attached to it. many people with the fawn response are direct victims of someone who was malignantly manipulative. calling the victims manipulative too is an unfair and unkind reading of the situation. it would be better and more empathetic to say it is safety-seeking or connection-seeking behavior. yes, it can be toxic. no, in general it is not intended to be toxic. there is no reason to make mentally ill people feel worse for what we undergo.
you type why is everyone so quick to turn on someone showing clear signs of trauma but you already know the fucking answer, so what's the point of bothering. you kind of hate those this is what anxiety looks like! infographics because at this point you're so good at white-knuckling through a severe panic attack that people just think you're stoic. even people who know the situation sometimes comment you just don't seem depressed. and you're not a 9 year old white kid so there's no way you're on the spectrum, you're not obsessed with trains and you were never a good mathematician. okay then.
mental illness is trending. in 2012 tumblr said don't romanticize our symptoms but to be fair tiktok didn't exist yet. there's these series of videos where someone pretends to be "the most boring person on earth" and is just being a normal fucking person, which makes your skin crawl, because that probably means you are boring. your friend reads aloud a profile from tinder - no depressed bitches i fucking hate that mental illness crap. your father says that medication never actually works.
you still haven't told your grandmother that you're in therapy. despite everything (and the fact it's helping): you just don't want her to see you differently.
#writeblr#warm up#to be clear let me state again: i think you should id however you fucking want if it helps you seek peace#but there is a HUGE difference between being like '.... im undiagnosed but i think i might be X'#and a person who is like ''omg my intrusive thoughts made me buy a birkin!!!''#babe mine made me throw up bc they disgusted me so much <3#mine made me hurt myself evenly. even when i wanted to stop. i have had to put my hand on the stove MULTIPLE TIMES#and again i'd rather have 10000 people get help for something they don't need help for#than have 1 kid NOT get help#but there has GOTTTTT to be a middle ground here#bc at this point it isn't ''raising awareness''#it's . fucking misinformation. and ''what this picture says about you!!!!!''#& yes! im mostly talkin about ppl who are actually disgusted and offended by signs of mental illness#but use it to defend THEIR actions#like babe you hate when kids start yelling in the walmart? but you YOuRSELF can yell?#you are depressed so it's fine you were cruel to your spouse?#but if your spouse spends too much time in bed she's a lazy fuck?#your partner needs to do everything for you bc of your history in trauma? but when SHE has needs she's being clingy and gross?#HUGE difference here between whom i think most of my followers are btw. like#all it takes is fucking anyyyy empathy or kindness . like.#anyway it's hard to explain im hoping we all know the person im talking about lol
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demanding a series in the same vein (heh, vein) as Dexter/Hannibal wherein a prolific serial killer plays cat & mouse with the police--except the serial killer in question is a preteen schoolgirl. this would make for compelling television due to the fact that middle school frequently causes girls to become deranged, and more media should reflect this
#she hangs out at active crime scenes in a way that should be a red flag but 'evades' the police simply by merit of being in 7th grade#the ONE 'detective'/nemesis who is convinced she had something to do with The Murders#is the classmate who sorta tried to bully her at the beginning of the school year but then the vibes got all intense and sapphic#so she backed off and has been Ignoring the Nerd she does Not have a special interest in#except then The Murders begin and she has so many Suspicions BUT#everytime she confronts the antihero the interaction ends in accidental intimacy followed by furious blushing#the nemesis's father is an (unsympathetic) cop character who repeatedly ignores his daughter's concerns#'dad i think the weird girl in my math class is a serial killer' 'that's not an excuse for failing algebra. go do your homework'
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got an urge to design ponies oops
#If people like this I'll do the rest of the life cast... No cutiemarks though cause Im really bad at those#geminitay fanart#pearlescentmoon fanart#jimmy solidarity#martyn inthelittlewood#scott smajor fanart#zombiecleo fanart#bdubs fanart#ethoslab fanart#impulse fanart#joel smallishbeans#he was difficult lol. I tried all sorts of green + brown (sometimes borderline red) colors but none felt quite right#so I just. made both the body and hair both green and brown. I think theres definitely a better design to be had here but I did my best#ldshadowlady fanart#Impulse ofc mostly inspired from that one skin where he has a beard#seeing people do fan designs for lifers is the only thing that gave me the urge to draw this#I wanted to see how much the colors could be played around with without making the ponies unrecognizable#and also like. pleasant to the eye. Again as if they could fit into the show itself#there arent a lot of skin toned ponies walking around equestria for a reason... it's uncanny unfortunately#that often makes fan ponies all follow the exact scame scheme of light body + dark hair#they get really indistinguishable so go wild!!!! mix things up!!!#sorry Im passionate about animal character design and ponies#tubby art
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These freaks are not studying (good for them)
Closeups below :)
#they all fully passed out by accident#except for Adaine who sat down with the intention of tricking Riz into napping#ugh#I fully believe that they follow the safety in numbers rule while sleeping but none of them ever admit it out loud#when you’ve had your body taken over by a nightmare god in the past you kinda don’t feel great sleeping alone y’know?#check out the Fabian and Gorgug jacket swap too cause that’s my favorite thing to do#the bad kids all wear each others clothes so much it’s hard to remember who they originally belonged to and I believe that#and they love each other so much#fantasy high#d20#d20 fantasy high#dimension 20#d20 fanart#fantasy high fanart#fh#fhjy#adaine abernant#riz gukgak#fabian seacaster#kristen applebees#gorgug thistlespring#fig faeth#the bad kids#kalina#Cassandra is in the stars :)#undescribed#not described#my art
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Just a sleepover
#trolls#trolls 3#trolls band together#brozone#trolls oc#trolls oc cory#clay trolls#bruce trolls#Floyd trolls#branch trolls#john dory#john dory trolls#trolls comic#its really giving “😏 im stuff”#oh well ..#this isnt really like canon within the au i just thought it would be funny and conflama if . this happened#they just had a sleepover idk ... but sleepover is like 3rd base if youre a troll JfjejcjkDJJCJEJD IF YOUR ADULTS#this is really turning into jd dating sim cause i want to follow every path#if this was a dating sim id probably do corys route first .....#BUT ANYWAY this just made me laugh at work all day so#i also have something that i wanna post but .... ..... ..... well ... we'll see#not my house man NOT IN MY HOUSE!!!#<- branch
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Sometimes I want to bring Morrigan but then I remember I play as a face-tanking rogue and I bring Wynne. Warden Cousland, Morrigan, Wynne / Dragon Age Origins (c) Bioware
#dragon age#dragon age fan art#comic#morrigan#warden cousland#healer#bioware#dao#dragon age origins#hero of ferelden#cousland#wynne#I'm back. I guess.#I did not notice at first but apparently I took a break from tumblr. I've already had several breakdowns over the dashboard.#(turns out I was on the 'for you' tab rather than the 'following' tab. the theme had changed as well. absolutely insufferable.)#I've felt really unconnected for a while but it actually feels better now? as if my tumblr mutuals was the missing link.#very healthy and hot of me ngl#so. I had a two week holiday this year and they were instantly slurped up. it went so fast!#there was this big football thing the week before my holiday - basically teams of teens come from all around the world to play etc.#I heard a girl tell her teammates that 'I'd love to travel on this bus every morning; happy people all around you; just add some music...'#she was also very excited when the bridge opened. the 'happy people' around her sighed bitterly and leaned back for a ten minute wait.#it is thankfully over now. the bus home is no longer stuffed full of football teams. but it's a fun experience for the players etc etc etc#well. in other thrilling news I went to spy on our sister shops during my time off. to see what they do differently. maybe steal some ideas#one store was like an instagram post with fancy teacups and stylish outfits. who knew a second-hand store could be so boring.#the other was like a man-cave with furniture and a passively-aggressive note by the toys stating that 'if u break it u pay. idiot. tnx<3'.#the man-cave was my favourite :)#rant over now! take care and bye etc!
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Palestinian Fundraiser Donation Match! 🕊️🇵🇸
I decided to use a recent payment I received for an illustration to donate to every Palestinian who reached out to me this past week. Please share this list, and if you are able, pick at least one donation to match me! Many small donations can go a long way which is why I took the time to put together this post. (date: August 11)
@esraayyad14 | vetted here | match my €5 donation
@mohiy-gaza | vetted here | match my $5 donation
@azaxa | vetted here | match my €5 donation
@abedallhferwanagaza | vetted here (#60) | match my €5 donation
@mahmoud0hilles | vetted here (#198) | match my €5 donation
@noorabd1992 | vetted here | match my $5 donation
@ayaalanqarsblog | vetted here | match my €5 donation
@ahmedalnabeeh11 | vetted here (#218) | match my €5 donation
@ehabayyad23 | Bilal Salah shared this post | match my €5 donation
@emanfamily81 | vetted here | match my €5 donation
@samarsh97 | vetted here | match my €5 donation
@mayadayyad81 | vetted here twice (#144) | match my $5 donation
@bisanalbalawi18 | vetted here | match my €5 donation
@malakabed | vetted here | match my €5 donation
@abdelmutei | vetted here | match my €5 donation
@lailashaqoura | vetted here (#152) | match my €5 donation
@fedao | vetted here | match my $5 donation
@motaz225 | vetted here | match my $5 (~$53 SEK) donation
@free-gaza2 | vetted here | match my $5 donation
@ahmadresh | vetted here | match my $5 donation
@falestine-yousef | vetted here and clarified here | match my $5 donation
#this last one for falestine had some confusion previously over whether the fund was stealing images from other fund posts but it is legit!#falestine is a sibling of the doaa family#since these are all links I grabbed from when I donated I do see if you click on them and donate and I appreciate it immensely!#I don’t check who it is usually but I appreciate that you take me up on donation matching 🫶#reminder that I also run donation charity commissions so if you follow me you will see how your donation in August can count towards#a future round of commissions when I make a post about waitlist and commission rounds soon!
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good mornings throughout the travel
[ID: Two comics of Vash and Wolfwood from Trigun Maximum. The second is underneath the read more.
The first is in four panels and follows Vash and Wolfwood through hotel rooms. First, Vash and Wolfwood exit adjacent rooms, and Wolfwood has sparkles floating around him as he exclaims, “Rise and shine! Ready to go?” Vash frowns, displeased, and says, Urk— Good morning to you too.”
Next, they’re in a room with two beds. Wolfwood is awake and fully dressed. He’s sitting on the bed and smoking, back turned away from the viewer and he says, “Wake up already, sleepyhead.” Vash sits up with his eyes still closed and yawns before saying good morning. After that, they’re sharing a bed, and Wolfwood gets up and says, “Morning, sunshine. Time to get up.” His body shadows Vash from the sunlight. Vash is still lying down with a blanket draped over him as he mumbles good morning.
Finally, they’re embracing in bed, both shirtless. Sunlight shines on them, but their contact allows their shadows to drape over their faces. Vash smiles, kisses the top of Wolfwood’s head, and says, “Good morning, Wolfwood.” Wolfwood sleepily says, “Mph, g’morning, needle-noggin’,” snuggling into on Vash’s shoulder. End ID] ID CREDIT
TRIMAX Vol. 10 Spoilers under read more // bonus comic
[ID: The bonus comic starts with Vash asleep in bed, fully clothed with his hair half-black. Someone says “Good morning,” and Vash says, “Morning, Wolf—w...” He trails off as Livio, holding a plate of food, stares with abject shock.
Livio says, “I’m sorry.” Vash, smiling but sweating, says, “No, it’s my bad...” Livio repeats, “I’m sorry.” Vash says, “Geez, stop apologizing,” and cuts off Livio’s “I—” with a “Good morning, Livio.” Livio quietly mumbles, “... Good morning...”
Vash sits up from the couch he was sleeping on and looks down, thinking, “... That’s right. I won’t wake up to you anymore... I have to get used to that...” End ID]
#vashwood#vash the stampede#nicholas d wolfwood#trigun#trigun maximum#i just think. when theyre traveling for a long time together#sleeping in the same inns sleeping in the same rooms potentially as they get closer#realizing they dont need to pay the fee for 2 bedrooms if theyre comfortable fighting back to back#realizing they dont need to pay the fee for 2 beds after one night of being forced to sleep in same one since all the 2 beds rooms ran out#and being comfortable with it - and then after their feelings are shared#realizing theyd rather sleep and rest peacefully next to one another#and wake up slowly and enjoy the mundane while they can#i drew ww waking up first bc i dont imagine he sleeps much tbh. i think vash is a light sleeper too and more often than not#and vash goes to bed just bc he knows if he tries to leave ww would follow him#i also think vash never had someone stand guard for him before even if that isnt what he wants out of ww to do. but knowing that ww is#there means that he can actually sleep peacefully without worry that someones going to drop on him immediately. i think he'd get used tothat#and ww -- as he opens his heart more to vash -- gets comfortable staying in bed a little longer#sleeps a little better -- especially when they start to share a bed bc there's a warmth there that he can't help but cave into#bc he hasn't had that in a long time.#ruporas art
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Do you ever think about the fact, that if Riko had actually killed Kevin instead of just breaking his hand that Neil would never have met Andrew. and that Neil would fade from the world without a soul to remember him, and Andrew would forever be a monster to everyone who knew him. Or are you normal??
#aftg#all for the game#kevin day#andrew minyard#neil josten#the foxhole court#if Kevin had died Neil would probably stop following the sport and may not join the Millport team#and be doing so lose his last reason to keep fighting#his last connection to the happy parts of his childhood#all just speculation tho obvi
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HE WAS SO MAD
#classic Kakashi DID disobey orders for his kids#It's insane when people say he'd never act rebellious against konoha when the evidence is there in the classic#or course things changed in shippuden#but in the classic? he went to the land of the waves mission without reporting the the classification was wrong#because he wanted to help tazuna properly#he allowed sasuke to fight in the preliminaries with the cursed mark and secretly sealed it went it was over#he hide the fact that a three men cell was needed for the chuning exams to give sakura the space to decide for herself what she wanted#he was all the time hiding information and acting on his own#even when he says later that he couldn't do much for them it's not because he didn't try#the village fucked him over they set him up for failure and in some sense he knew it#he accepted to be their sensei because he cared for them and he was on their side#I'm fully convinced that if shippuden had followed the classic as it was supposed to do kakashi would have rebelled in more than one way#but it didn't happen :( so#Kakashi Hatake#naruto#Tsunade Senju#Naruto Classic
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The transgender contrast of loving your parents but also for Trust Reasons longing for an additional external authority figure you can count on more unconditionally to support or protect you that totally doesn’t risk becoming a kink
#my stuff#haha yeah i’m so loyal and trusting and will serve you unto death#this in no way is derived from the agony of being misgendered by my parents all my life#which is ongoing btw bc ‘there’s nobody we know that i trust to talk about your transition with’#LIKE HM MAYBE YOU SHOULD THINK ABT WHY THAT IS#MAYBE ITS BC THOSE PPL ARE IGNORANT CUNTS THEN#anyway haha what if you were my superior officer and i killed for you like a dog#what if you were my god and i followed your compulsion to kill and eat until you were satisfied#what if you kept me to yourself and looked after me in private as i do you in public#what if my loyalty was rewarded#what if i had no obligation but duty to you#what if you made it all ok
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month of ingo, day 2: battle + day 3: loud
nooo ingo don't hit your ally in multis ahahaha (it's not haxorus this time)
(also, i hadn't realised, but it's the 1 year anniversary of my blog. here's to many more years with you guys! if you'll have me...)
#i'm not going to do all the prompts i just had this idea ready for the 2 prompts following gear station#pokemon#submas#my art#pokemon black and white#pokemon hilda#pokemon hilbert#month of ingo#sept ingo
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NO MORE ASSOCIATING THINGS WITH FEMMES ONLY BECAUSE THEY ARE PINK!HYPERFEM FEMMES ARE GREAT AND I LOVE YOU CAMPY FEMMES WHO EMBODY PINK BUT ALSO JESUS CHRIST CAN YOU GUYS NOT GO MORE THAN ONE DAY W/O TRYING TO SHOEHORN FEMMES INTO BEING ONLY PINK UWU BABIES. I AM FEMME AS IN GRASS AS IN DIRT AS IN TREE BARK AS IN WEEDS SPROUTING THROUGH THE SIDEWALK CEMENT. FEMME AS IN GENDER NONCONFORMITY AS IN FUCK YOU MY FEMININITY IS WHAT *I* SAY IT IS. FEMME AS IN DEPTH AND DARKNESS AND WARMTH AND TERROR. FEMME AS IN CAVES. FEMME AS IN LIGHTNING. FEMME AS IN AN AMALGAMATION OF TRAITS THAT I HAVE DECIDED ARE FEMININE REGARDLESS OF WHAT SOCIETY SAYS. FUCK IS IT THAT HARD TO UNDERSTAND?!???
#personal#i am emotional yes#over the years ive had this blog I've made a few posts abt being femme#nd whether they're serious or jokey..... inevitably someone in the tags goes “ohhh yeah bc pink”#or in the case of what inspired this post: someone going “what about the pink ones” on my praying mantis post#and im just.#sick of it. im sick of femme being equated to pink and frilly girlie behaviors.#im sick of femme being equated to skirts and heels. to makeup. to skincare. to pristine nails exactly almond shaped.#im sick of ppl acting like All femmes aspire to this shit. im sick of femms being reduced to this shit.#and i love pink! i love pink! my phone theme is quite literally just black and pink all over.#im just. so tired of any expression of Femme identity being shoehorned into being a Specific type of femininity#especially as someone who DOES get dysphoric wearing skirts. wearing dresses. embodying the femme aesthetic yall are so set on making#if u guys wanna rb this i truly dont care#i just needed to scream#and this is one small thing#but the 2nd largest category of anon hate i have gotten since making this blog is str8 up homophobia from other “queer” folks#saying i cant be femme bc of how i present. calling me slurs (and using them as such) bc they cant understand femme as anything but that#my wife and i have our users in our personal discord server set as 2 different things of anon hate ive gotten#i have had OTHER FEMMES tell me i am not femme. femmes who Know im femme who still call me butch. femmes who ive corrected and been blocked#-by bc of it. the number 1 largest demographic of queerfolk who have me blocked rn is TME femmes who embody pink also#and i dont think its a coincidence at all. (and i know this bc i go to try and follow these ppl bc they get rbed on my dash & i cant)#and ik their blogs arent deleted bc some of them don't block my wife (tall. white. butch) and it cant be politics cause her and i rb#a lot of the same political shit (fuck. i think she rbs More than i do even. this is genuinely mainly a nsft blog)#and usually i don't say anything but im having a bad day so i get to be angry about this and if anyone fucking tries me i will block u#idc if we've been mutuals 4ever. im judt so tired of feeling like i am not Enough as a femme bc i dont embody this shit#im sick of this lameass lip service to he/him gnc femmes etc when the thin white 50s housewife femme is still what is preferred and loved#im sick of this lamesss lip service when y'all feel entitled to theorizing on other femmes genders bc u cant conceptualize a femme who does#wanna be hypetfeminine. im sick of it. im sick of it. im sick of it.#celebrity bun
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aughdhshfjjsjcjdjfjsbgsknfjs <- leshy in this art probably
#mrk.art#cult of the lamb#cotl fanart#cotl narinder#the one who waits#cotl leshy#blood#eye injury#eyestrain#imagine. you ar— WERE. you were my older brother. you might've had a stick up your ass but i still cared for you. loved you‚ even. and then#suddenly my followers‚ swayed by your experiments‚ left me and worshipped you instead. and i began to grow weak‚ to lose my power#my other siblings also suffered from this‚ allmighty gods no longer‚ for you stood above us in terms of might. and then—#and then— ...i do not know the full extent of what happened. but i know with all my being that you betrayed us.#we fought. godly blood was spilled. the last thing i remember seeing was your claws stained with ichor.#you are gone now‚ imprisoned forever in your realm‚ chained there to *rot*. and no matter how much vindication and hatred i feel for you‚#for the fact that you live still‚ as death could not be killed‚ there's a part of me that still yearns for an older brother who raised me‚#who taught me‚ who loved me‚ who betrayed me. who torn my eyes out of my head‚ ripped off my brothers ears‚ sliced my sister's throat open‚#crushed my sibling's skull.#bishop leshy#LMAO writing a ficlet in the tags. average tumblr user experience. j will now turn into a clam soup. good by e
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