#AFTER WHAT-- MONTHS OF PROCRASTINATING AND 3 HOURS OF RAGE?!

[charcoalgrayswriting]

Just stumble across your fae!Adler au, omg I love the idea. Like tries so much you could do with that(obsession, paranoia over the fear of a fae recapturing you, etc) can you imagine the shear terror when he eventually finds bell after those few years? And if going down the dark smut route… whooo

will there be wings if you ever plan on getting back to this

Omg hi anon!! Congrats, you're my first ever anon <3

Here's a bit more of what I thought about because you really motivated me and I needed to procrastinate an essay lol

Be warned, it's a lot.

Adler has the ability to manipulate peoples perceptions of the world. He uses this ability to trap and isolate Bell from their family and friends. He takes Bell’s real name from them and names them Bell, eventually forgetting their real name. They do not know about the fae world, had been raised with no magic and no magical friends to protect them.

Bell sees him as an old friend, not aware that he had changed their memories and forced them to forget things. The pair become inseparable, and Adler soon begins to view them as a friend, maybe something more >:)

When he has enough tethers in Bell to force them to do whatever he wants, Adler reveals his plan. Unfortunately for him, he no longer sees them as a toy to play with, but a genuine friend. In contrast, Bell feels horribly betrayed and becomes stiff and cold with him.

In an attempt to escape, they go to one of Adler’s enemies, Perseus. He manages to hide them from Adler. Then he forces them to drink a potion to paralyze them and rips the tethers from their body. It is not a kind process, it is violent and bloody and nearly kills them.

The process leaves them with cruel jagged scars across their body where the tethers were extracted. But they are free, though not entirely without Adler’s mark. He has even managed to brand them further than the scars, a little bell over their heart.

As soon as Perseus finished, even though they are closer to death than living, they kill him, and every other fae or creature they come across in their escape from Perseus’s area.

Making it from the fae world, they rent a shitty motel until they heal, and once they do heal, they find a coastal cottage selling for cheap, and buy it, slowly renovating it. It is then they discover that being in the Fae World for so long changed them, they are no longer quite human. The area Bell occupies is cold enough that it reminds them of winter, but not so cold to send them into a panic attack. They can no longer stand to live in the heat, and have become something not quite human, not quite fae.

But, two years into hiding, Adler finds them. He doesn’t let them know of course. No, first he needs to observe them. He watches them for six months. In those six months, he brushes up against their wards, getting them used to his presence. During this time, he uses his magic to help them, keeping their food fresh for longer, helping them sleep, soothing their worried mind. Eventually the wards come to understand him as a helpful figure, and let him onto the protected lands.

At the end of the two years, he knocks on their door. When they instantly try to kill him, he restrains them. He studies them, the scars left by his tethers being cruelly extracted, and looks for his mark. The mark he gave them when Bell had thought them friends. When Bell begs him to kill them, not to take them, he feels sadness, then promptly ignores it and their request.

For the first few hours, they scream themselves hoarse at him. They call him names and curses and rage as they throw things and attack him, telling him to get out of their house. It takes him the entitreity of those hours to grab Bell, to cradle them in his arms and attempt to calm them down.

His hold does the opposite, as they then begin to beg him, begging for him to just kill them, to just let them go, please don’t take their memories again. Finally, they begin to cry in earnest big heaving sobs that choke out their voice, not letting him comfort them.

They fell asleep on the couch cradled in his arms, tears still running down their cheeks. Eventually, when they woke up, they were cold and distant with him.

— Two Ideas from here —

Adler decides to let them continue living their life, though he kept popping up.

Eventually, Bell begins to reluctantly trust him. Slowly, their relationship resembled what it had been in the beginning. Soon, they were reading and watching movies together, even falling asleep next to each other on the sofa.

Time goes by, and the pair have repaired their relationship. Alder then gives Bell his name, and gives them their name back. They have emotional sex, and Adler asks them to come back with him. They agree, and he takes them back to his little corner of the Fae Lands, and they live together forever.

Not happily ever after however. Oh there are loud fights and silent treatments and many more nasty things between them. But for every unhappy moment, there are a thousand more good ones.

— OR —

When they fall asleep, Adler steals them away back to his lands. Bell wakes up terrified confused in his bed, someone having changed them into soft nightclothes with Adler running a soothing hand through their hair. They try to escape, but Adler pins them down.

In the beginning, Adler would have used one of his tethers to force them to stay. But now? With the way they had been removed from their body, Bell could no longer bear his tethers, for any he tried to hook into them were rejected. So he just restrains them, keeps Bell pinned to the floor.

Then he leans in and kisses them. Though they try to reject it, he can feel their body reacting, can feel Bell’s arousal. So he continues, and it is kind and sweet. But it does not make things better as he had hoped.

When they stop, he watches in real time as the last of the spark goes out from their eyes. He doesn’t know what to do when they slump to the ground, like a puppet with its strings cut. All he can do is gather them to his chest and whisper comforting words. They liked it when he did it, before all this happened, surely it will help again this time? Right?

Wrong.

They don’t respond, having tunneled somewhere deep into their mind. It is weeks before they resurface. Even when Bell is back to themselves, they are distant. Bell doesn’t even pick fights with him. Their silence drives Adler up a wall in the way their anger never could achieve.

It continues this way for an indiscernible amount of time, after all what was such an inconvenient thing as time to an immortal being such as him? But it did last for longer than he had hoped, and he was about to give up on Bell, to grant their wish and end their life.

One night though, as he gets into bed beside Bell, they slump into him, and defeatedly mutter, “Okay. You win.” and for the first time in years, do not flinch away from his touch. He wraps an arm around their shoulder and they burrow closer. Nothing else happens that night, for he is wary of how Bell reacted to the last time they had sex.

It continues much in this same vein for a long time. No one is sure how long it takes, but eventually, Bell allows him one tether. And Adler vows never to use it to hurt them again. In return, he gives Bell his true name, so that if he ever does them harm again, Bell can hurt him as badly as he hurt them.

Wow this was a lot shorter in my notes. Whoops ':)

[gejnialnie]

I. BEAT. THE RADIANCE!

[hatsukeii]

【２３：１４】

The heavy bass line rings through your headphones as you scribble furiously onto the thin piece of loose leaf paper on your desk, a skinny desk lamp illuminating your workspace. Your strokes are slow and steady, cautious not to mess up your page of perfectly organised notes. When it ends up looking worse than before after your fifteen minutes of pure concentration and effort, you throw your pen down, letting it roll away sadly as you bury your face into your palms. It’s been a tough day, truly. School’s been rough on you lately, with the realisation that both your science teachers are absolute trash, as well as the pileup of assignments and assessments due in a week or two. Maybe if they were able to teach for once in their measly little teaching journey, you wouldn’t be up at eleven on a school night desperately trying to understand the overload of information that was the entire immune system and all its mechanisms shoved onto your plate during class, of which they made no effort to explain or talk about. No, you can’t put all the blame on them, considering there’s a bigger contributor to your insomnia. 

Writing notes is just an escape, an excuse to avoid having to think of anything else, to shut the outside world out and live in your little comfort bubble. When the dumb hormones and intrusive thoughts and fantasies manage to get into your head even while you’re at peak concentration, there has to be a bigger problem within. There are three categories of “bigger problems.” Number one would be your period, the time of joy for every single woman isn’t it? Everything is amplified when you’re on your period. Emotions, feelings, pain, everything. That combined with the agonizingly painful cramps are enough to make you feel like burning everything to the ground in frustration. Number two would be an earworm, bonus points if it lasts for more than two months. Stupid earworms, forcing you to play the same two songs on repeat for hours on end while you study. You can’t hold yourself back and sing along to verses and in no time you’re dancing along and having a full on concert at your desk and suddenly the thought of studying for that test you have in two weeks or doing that project that’s due tomorrow but you procrastinated on and left to do today slips out of your mind. Number three, also the most troublesome and irritating, is a person. Someone that you just cannot for the life of you get out of your mind. Someone so interesting and intriguing that you can’t help but desire to learn more about them. What their interests are, what their favourite music is, how they let out rage, their mannerisms, anything, everything. Today, you’ve got a mix of everything amped up to the max.

You let this one particular Heat Waves remix play again for what happens to be about the thirteenth time within the past two hours, slamming your head onto the table once the lyrics start. “Sometimes all I think about is you.” You say along the singular line, letting your eyes flutter shut. Man if only that line doesn’t apply to your current situation, that would be greatly appreciated. It’s so stupid. This is so stupid. Everything is crumbling down again like skyscrapers during an earthquake, shattering into pieces when it hits the concrete ground beneath them, all because you were too weak to not fall for someone. It’s dumb, ridiculous, and you hate it. You let your eyes open again, adjusting to the warm light of your desk. Scrolling through the comments, there’s a common pattern. “It’s always we need to talk, but never yntbkshycryn” You shouldn’t have gotten curious and tried to find out what it meant, because now you can’t stop fantasising about how euphoric it’ll be with Tsukishima’s hands around your neck and you on your tiptoes as your lips meet and he kisses you so hard that you can’t remember your name.

Edit 1: bet you didn’t see this coming did you

Ps. Hey you found me! :D Now never return please<3 (heart is for added effect)

[aeroknot]

kinda riffing off the exhausting thought about 2019 only being 2 years ago...

like. every hour i feel guilty for “not doing more.” some of that guilt and shame i think is... more suited to me just needing to take some personal responsibility for procrastination and laziness. but a lot of it is... truly, what i suspect to be undiagnosed ADD that i haven’t learned how to manage yet. and fatigue.

i have to let myself remember the fatigue. to remember - spurred by my flippant comment - that 2020 knocked me on my ass. i know it was truly horrific for the whole world, so i think i downplay my own struggles because of that. i’m alive, i have a home, and i’m not in a depressive spiral— that’s the win, right? i should be grateful. i should be thriving.

but, like... my dad’s cancer came back and hasn’t really budged. my brother was almost stuck in russia— his flights kept getting canceled (not even because of covid— because of bomb threats); he just barely squeaked through the travel bans. my car was repossessed because of an error in renewal and payment instructions given to us by the dealership. so we bought it— just paid off what was left of the lease. 3 months later that car was rear-ended and totaled— when i already barely left the house bc of covid and especially bc of my immunocompromised father. so in the like 10 times i’d left the house in 6 months, i suffered a year-long insurance runaround over a crash that was 0% my fault. a few weeks after the car being totaled, i had to flee my home when raging wildfires encircled it on all four directions of the compass. i cried every day in the hotel room. the fires got within 2 miles of my home, with every sentimental item and art piece of mine inside. my mother was attacked in her own home— broken ribs, broken knee, the psychological trauma. covid closed our family restaurant multiple times— and continues to; we are pouring personal loans from our savings / investments and federal loans into the business to keep afloat. meanwhile all of the election distress and pain of our polarized society was buzzing in the background. and oh, the isolation: i haven’t seen a friend in real life in over a year, and i’m already a very majorly introverted homebody with rejection sensitive dysphoria so i self-isolate. and at christmas i found out my cousin was admitted into long-term rehab for her eating disorders, which i didn’t even know she was struggling with.

and after all that... i am sitting here, beating myself up for art block— and for struggling to re-organize my life— and for being reluctant to go fight the mental health system that wants to tell me i’m overreacting to diagnose myself with adult ADD— and for being afraid to hope for success— and having trouble believing in myself— and overall just berating myself for worrying about my most basic pyramid levels of security needs being met.

it was a hard year. can i let that sink in? can i allow myself some grace?

[purplesurveys]

1141

survey by lets-make-surveys

1 - Do you have a favourite day of the week? What is it about that day that you like so much? I feel like I just answered this recently, but let’s go with Friday again. Always nice to fade out after work and to finally close all my work tabs and chats, and not feel obligated to reply to anyone for a couple of days.

2 - Would you describe yourself as a sociable person or not? I’m not the most sociable person, like I don’t always have the energy to be at the maximum level of perky, but I am to an extent. I no longer find it difficult to approach people and strike up a conversation.

3 - Who was the last person you spoke to out-loud? What did you speak to them about? My mom. My former director, Ysa, sent me a scented candle earlier tonight - as a parting gift since she got promoted and got reassigned to my employer’s sister company - and I just asked my mom to light the candle up because I’m scared of matches and fire.

4 - Do you prefer tea or coffee? Coffee; I never drink tea.

5 - What's your ideal weather? When was the last time you had that kind of weather where you live? Any kind of weather where the temperature is anywhere below 25ºC (which is already considered quite chilly here) is fine with me.

6 - Who was the last person (apart from family) that you spent time with? What did you get up to? Does virtual count? I had a Jeopardy night on Zoom with my orgmates a couple of weeks ago. I might miss out on a couple of people, but I was with Peter, Elis, Andi, Carmel, Robin, Laurice, and Mik. Apart from that, my uncle treated me, my kuya, and my cousin Luke to lunch the morning after said Zoom call.

7 - If you have pets, when was the last time one of them got on your nerves? Oh my god, just this afternoon. I was in a Zoom call with a client and besides our PR agency, there was another marketing agency in the call who was also pitching their presentation deck. The entire call was pure bliss on my end, no one was making noise at home – the second it came to my speaking parts, Cooper started howling and barking like crazy because idk, maybe he saw an animal outside or something?? In any case it suddenly got very loud and I got caught off-guard, and I ended up stuttering several times as I was trying to focus.

8 - Do you have to wear a uniform at work or school? If not, what do you tend to wear? The only time I had to wear a legit uniform was in private school, which I attended from preschool to high school. We do have business casual dress code at work, but that in itself is pretty flexible so I don’t really count it as a ‘uniform.’

9 - Would you rather live in a house with a swimming pool or an indoor cinema? Indoor cinema. I watch a lot of things that I’d love to be able to view with a much bigger screen - plus it’s a lot easier to maintain than a pool, lol.

10 - When was the last time you were at the beach? August 2019 :(

11 - Do you own a credit card? If so, do you currently owe any money on it? Could you afford to pay it off tomorrow if necessary? No. My parents also advise against getting my own credit card since I could pick up some bad spending habits from it, according to them. That sounds scary enough so I’m ok with my debit card.

12 - What do you tend to wear to sleep in? Does this vary depending on the time of year? Usually something light, short, and airy since I live in a tropical country that never gets to enjoy temperatures lower than like 23ºC.

13 - What do you tend to have for breakfast, if you eat it? Fried rice, hotdogs, and bacon strips are filling enough for me.

14 - If someone offered to cook you a three-course-meal of your choosing, no budget - what would you have? Oysters, filet mignon, and macarons.

15 - How many hours of sleep do you typically get each night? Is that enough to function or would you rather have more? Anywhere between 7–9 during weekdays, and like 3–4 during weekends because revenge bedtime procrastination is real. Yeah, I’d say it’s enough on both ends.

16 - Does your house have a loft/basement? Are they functional or do you just use them for storage? We have neither.

17 - When was the last time you did a load of laundry? Do you need to do some in the near future? I don’t do the laundry at home.

18 - Are you addicted to anything legal? What about illegal? I guess vaping? I’m a lot more reliant on it now versus the past few months, and I get a little restless whenever I have to charge it for an hour or so. 

19 - Do you suffer from road rage? What kind of thing tends to set you off or wind you up while driving? A little bit, but I obviously haven’t had to express it in a while because of my much-lessened time on the road due to Covid. Standstill traffic is the biggest factor, but standstill traffic + stupid drivers who are impatient and end up not following the road lanes is the quickest way to irritate me and set me off.

20 - What kind of animal did you last see in the wild? Is that a common sight where you live? I have no idea, and that’s precisely because I live in the suburbs in a city which would not make them a common sight.

21 - How is your hair styled at the moment? Low side ponytail.

22 - Do you post a lot on social media? If so, what kind of thing do you tend to post on there? Not as much as I used to. I’ll probably post 5–7 tweets (versus the 50+ I’d post when I was younger) and share like 1–3 Facebook posts a day. I could talk about pretty much everything on Twitter since that’s my main dump - be it rants, my feelings, what I ate, the latest dumb thing Cooper did, etc. On Facebook I mostly share memes, at least family-friendly ones that wouldn’t alert my relatives lol.

23 - What are you watching/listening to at the moment? Nothing for either. I can hear some birds chirping outside since it’s finally getting brighter again, but that’s it.

24 - If you have multiple pets, do they all get along with each other or are there sometimes fights/scuffles? Cooper has actually finally settled down a bit so I’m starting to feel more comfortable letting him out with Kimi in the same room/floor. He understands that Kimi doesn’t like being disturbed so even though he’s in the mood to run around and be energetic and play catch or whatever, he always takes the time to tip-toe around Kimi. They’re not best buds by any means, but it’s enough to leave them be and not worry about a fight breaking out anymore. Sweet boys.

25 - What are some habits you have in common with your parents? My dad excessively blinks when he’s feeling tense or in an argument; I ended up picking that up from him. With my mom, it’s mostly phrases or expressions that she likes to use.

26 - Where's your favourite place to swim - the ocean, a pool, river, lake etc? Beaches.

27 - When you're saving your place in a book, do you use a bookmark or fold your pages down? Or something else? I either remember the page number or do a tiny dog-ear. Bookmarks aren’t the right match for me lol, I’ll most likely end up losing them.

28 - What's your favourite kind of cereal? Sweeter ones.

29 - Is any part of your body hurting at the moment? Is there a specific incident that caused the pain? Yeah, my neck had actually been seriously stiff during my last shift and I couldn’t move my head unless I moved my entire body along with it. It’s died down now but I can definitely still feel the strain. My left shoulder in particular feels very strained at the moment and I’m feeling a considerable level of discomfort from it as I take this.

30 - What was the last thing to make you laugh out loud? 2 Days 1 Night, the usual. The Korean style of video editing is phenomenal and can literally make anything funny.

[btsvt-adventures]

Shifter AU - Guarded Hearts

A/n: Long awaited (and procrastinated) part 3 lmao, this deadass took me months to write because life hit me hard in the face and yelled Fuck You 

Pairing: Jihoon x Seungcheol (Jicheol), Jeonghan x Jisoo (Jihan)

Warning(s): Angst, death, swearing  

Words:  3,767

Want more of this AU? Or want your own AU? Ask me here!

Shifter AU: (Cat)ch Me If You Can | Feline Feelings | Guarded Hearts

The Royal family had an ancestral secret. One that was fiercely protected, closely guarded, and well hidden.

All with royal blood were born with the ability to shapeshift into domesticated animals. All but one.

A hidden prince, born out of an illicit affair between the King and a maid. He alone had the mysterious ability to shift into predators.

Him, and his descendants were offered two options:

Guard the Royal family.

Or die.

All royal guards remember the day they were recruited. Some had happier stories, tales of excitement, joy, pride, even, at the thought of being selected for such an honour-filled task.

Others were… less. Seungcheol wishes he could erase the memory, but it’s permanently burned into his mind.

Seungcheol distinctly remembers the way he was so excited for his birthday – his eighteenth! –.

He’d woken up with a weird, tingling pit in his stomach, but he ignored it, figuring it was just nerves for hitting such a big, important, adult, milestone. He sat himself at the table, willfully ignoring the unsettling tension around him, brightening up when his sister brought out his favourite cake.

“Happy birthday Cheollie,” she beamed, setting it down in front of him. He leaned over to hug her, thanking her profusely for the red velvet birthday cake.

If only he’d paid more attention to the warning signs. He remembers the air, reeking of fear, their instinctive retreat when he tried to reach out for his family, the way they slumped in relief when the guards took him away.

He was panting, world dizzy and dread pooling in his belly. He could hear his parents screaming and his sister sobbing, apologizing over and over, but he was too disoriented to figure out whatever she had said. 

(He later learns that she’d spiked the cake with a shifting serum, thinking it would be harmless because he was human. 

He wasn’t.)

His vision was alarmingly sharp, and he could see the remnants of his birthday cake in a heap on the floor, the vibrant red crumbs scattered on the wood floor of their cozy apartment. The sweet scent of red velvet permeated the air, the sharp tang of cream cheese frosting tickling his nose, and.. something else. He couldn’t pinpoint it then, but the scent was unpleasant, bitter, even. He glanced up, staring at his family huddled in a corner of their house, away from the dangers, away from him.

“Eomma please I- I’m scared,” Seungcheol cries, reaching out for his mother, who just recoiled in fear.

Seungcheol bites back a whimper, lashes wet with tears as he watches his father pull his wife and daughter behind him.

“Appa –“

His pleas are suddenly cut off when three figures storm into the house. Seungcheol turns suddenly, a warning growl ripping from his throat. The guards are taken aback but didn’t move, and Seungcheol recoils when he realizes what he’s done.

“Choi Seungcheol, aged 18, Cheetah.”

“Ch-Cheetah?“ he gasps, scrambling back in a panic when they advance towards him. “N-No I’m sorry– Please –” One of the guards (who Seungcheol learns is named Yoongi) walks forward to where Seungcheol is, kneeling and meeting the teenager’s wide, terror-filled brown eyes.

“Hey, hey, kid, it’s okay,” he soothes. “I’m sorry, but you need to make a choice,” he murmurs, and Seungcheol hiccups, turning back to look at his family. Yoongi follows his gaze, waiting patiently till Seungcheol turns back to him, eyes red rimmed and filled with pain.

Yoongi hyung was one of the head recruiters. He was a cobra shifter, and had an uncanny ability to get people to calm down and listen to him (Seungcheol thinks it’s the way he’s completely unflustered, but Jimin thinks it’s because Yoongi has a terrifying aura and listening is better than certain death).

“What choice do I have?” he whispered hoarsely, tears spilling down his cheeks. Everyone knew what happened if you turned down the royal guards.

Seungcheol had never understood why they executed those who refused to join the guard, never knew why they didn’t just recruit normally like most armies did.

There were rumours of course, whispers in the night about the guard secretly being wizards, monsters, magical, evil creatures who had unnatural gifts, to turn into whatever they wanted, to conjure weapons at will, and only those who were chosen would be allowed to train in the mysterious art.

He never understood why they were so secretive.

Until now.

Yoongi looked at him gently, like he knew exactly how it felt. “You’re a predator shifter, descended from the exiled brother of the royal family,” he explained, voice lowered to make sure Seungcheol’s family wouldn’t ever hear a word about it. “All descendants from his line must serve the Royal family, or be executed immediately to protect the Royal Secret.”

Seungcheol had stared at him, dumbfounded. Some things certainly made sense now (mostly him turning into a fucking cheetah), but it still didn’t explain why he had to be punished for something some stupid Royal did. 

“What Royal Secret?” Seungcheol asks dumbly, and Yoongi sighs quietly. 

Seungcheol learned that day why he has to serve the Royal family. He hated that he had no say in it, that this- gift – no, curse – had ripped him from his family, but he felt an odd sense of pride, knowing that he, and a select few others had the ability to protect the Heads of the Kingdom. 

He’d written a note for his terrified parents, apologizing for everything that had happened, and wished them the best. He writes to his older sister, telling her to look after their parents, and that he’s sorry he can’t protect her anymore, or be the little brother she adored so much. He puts the pen down and leaves the note on the table, tucked under his favourite cup, and Yoongi led him out of the house, away from home, his family, and life as he knew it.

He had chosen to stay silent the entire ride to the palace, not bothering to look at the other recruits. Seungcheol recognized a few familiar faces, but he didn’t want to think about having to interact and be social with anyone. 

He just wanted to go home. 

They arrived at the palace without much fanfare, and Seungcheol was assigned to a Korean American shifter named Aron. The alligator shifter regarded him coldly, ordering Seungcheol to follow him, explaining the rules and expectations of training while showing him to the dormitories. 

There were three stages to fully qualify as a Royal Guard; a basic physical test, a written test, and a final, secret test. They trained 6 days a week, 16 hours a week. Aron was the harshest of all the trainers (according to his fellow trainees at least), frequently calling Seungcheol in for extra trainings on Sundays. Most of his peers looked at him with pity while they enjoyed their free time, but he was grateful for the extensive regimen; it took his mind off his family, and it meant that he would be guaranteed to fall into an exhausted, dreamless sleep.

His off days were the worst. With nothing to do, and no one barking orders at him, Seungcheol would let his mind drift back to his family, and he’d feel a stab in his already fragile heart, the pain of being ripped from his beloved parents and sister still fresh after 6 months. 

Aron, despite his harsh, cold demeanor, was actually a huge softie, often calling Seungcheol out for drinks and food, offering advice, or even just a listening ear, and for that Seungcheol was eternally grateful. The alligator shifter  had pushed him hard, and he’d ended the only trainee that had passed the written test. (He’d celebrated so hard with Aron that they both woke up with raging hangovers, but it was so worth it).  

Seungcheol knew there was a final, secret test before he was fully inducted as one of the Royal Guards, and he expected another physical test, or another written test even. 

He didn’t expect this. 

He stares at the list of names and address, and all his memories come rushing back. The screams, the fear, the heartache, and Seungcheol is frozen. After a year, he’s right back where he started.

He can’t do this. 

He can’t. 

He can’t rip another family apart.

Aron sees the horror on his protégés face, and tugs him away quietly. 

“Breathe, Cheollie, breathe,” Aron instructs, gripping Seungcheol’s shoulders firmly, trying to ground his very freaked out trainee. 

“H-hyung I can’t – this –” he forces out, hands trembling. “How could I do this to someone else?” he whispers, eyes panicked, teary and scared. 

“You do it because you have to,” Aron answers honestly, and Seungcheol sucks in a shaky, deep breath. “I’ll be with you, all the trainers will. All you need to do is watch. We’re not asking you to take them yourself, the final test is to prove that you’re strong enough to conquer this fear,” he murmurs, and Seungcheol nods, quickly wiping away the tears that threaten to fall. 

“Okay,” he hiccups, taking another breath to steady himself. “Okay, let’s go.” 

Aron watches as his student puts himself back together, putting on a front as he heads out with the recruiting guards. He sighs, running a hand through his hair. The pleas and screams still haunt him, every single one since he first started three (not-so) long years ago. He sighs, resignedly following the newly-determined recruit, hoping this test won’t break his spirit. 

Seungcheol’s horrified. 

It had all been going so well. They’d picked up a snow leopard named Junhui, who was more than confused about the whole situation, but was more than happy to be recruited. He’d even glanced at Seungcheol and winked suggestively, snickering when Seungcheol’s ears turned bright red. He was happy, relieved, almost, that their recruitment had gone so well. 

And then it didn’t.

He stares at the scene unfolding before him, the young lion shifter struggling against the Royal Guards, yelling for help, attempting to shift in a fruitless bid to get away. Seungcheol flinches, looking away when the shifter is forced to his knees, the injection mercilessly administered. The anger on the young teenager’s face gives way to shock, then fear, before his expression crumples, and he slumps forward, motionless. Aron moves forward silently, checking him for a pulse, nodding when he finds none. The look on the guards’ faces is grim as they carry the body back into the house, bowing politely before moving onto the next house. Seungcheol’s still standing behind the house, staring at the spot where the new shifter – 

He can’t bring himself to say it. It makes him sick, and he fights the urge to throw up right there. Aron puts a gentle hand on his shoulder and he jumps, staring at his mentor, eyes filled with tears. 

“He – they –” he stammers, still refusing to accept whatever had just happened. Aron nods, looking back into the house, where they can both hear the family’s desperate, broken cries over the son they just lost. 

“Yeah,” Aron answers quietly. “It’s the least painful way to go,” he shrugs. “They can’t be allowed to roam free, it’s too dangerous. You know what happened the last time someone let a predator go,” he murmurs, and Seungcheol flinches, recalling the carnage that was left behind. He sighs, forcing whatever he just saw into the deepest crevices of his mind. He shoots Aron a grateful smile, taking a steadying breath before nodding, forcing himself to move on. 

Seungcheol wants to go home, soak himself in boiling water and scrub his skin raw. Maybe then, just maybe, it’ll wash the blood staining his hands. It’ll at least be a fitting punishment for everything he’s done just in this one day alone. 

“Please, please I can’t go to the palace, I –” she falters, turning back to look at her brother tearfully. 

Park Minhee, 18, Lynx. 

Seungcheol stays silent, eyes flicking to the girl’s  mother, her skin a chalky white, and her breathing laboured. 

She doesn’t have much time left, Seungcheol thinks, feeling the guilt (and bile) quickly rising. He forces it down, stepping forward when Minhee growls warningly, desperate to be with her family.  

“Then you know the consequences,” Yoongi says quietly, and she chokes on a sob, hesitating before she nods reluctantly. 

“I’ll- I’ll go with you. G-give me a minute to-to say goodbye, please,” she croaks, and Yoongi nods brusquely, motioning for the other guards to prepare for their departure back to the palace. 

Seungcheol wants to look away, knows he shouldn’t watch such a private moment, but he’s transfixed, the guilt swallowing him whole. Minhee leans down, hugging the young boy – no older than seven or eight – tightly, before resting her hands on his shoulders.

“Look after eomma, okay? Noona’s gotta go somewhere,” she whispers, and the young boy frowns in confusion. 

“But- what about eomma?  When’s noona coming back?” he asks, and the girl whimpers, pulling her brother into another tight hug. 

“I’m sorry,” she whispers, pulling away. “You have to be a big boy and look after eomma, okay? I love you so much,” she murmurs, pressing a kiss to his forehead. 

Minhee stands, kneeling by her mother’s bedside, pressing gentle, loving kisses to both her cheeks, whispering a broken “I love you,” before she pulls away, walking away without a second glance. 

The guards file out behind her, and Seungcheol’s heart drops when he hears the little boy crying for his sister, gut-wrenching, broken sobs as he watches his only sibling leave him behind. 

Seungcheol looks down at her motionless form, wondering why she thought she could do it. She’d lied to Yoongi, pretended to agree to join the Royal Guards, then had tried to attack him from behind. Seungcheol had acted instinctively, grabbing her from behind and subduing her, his strength and training easily overpowering her fully shifted form. 

Yoongi had the syringe in hand. Seungcheol heard the pained whimper, and the effects were almost immediate. She shifted back, and turned to look at Seungcheol, eyes wide and fearful as the realization dawned on her. 

“I’m sorry,” Seungcheol whispers, and Minhee struggles for a second before going limp. He drops her, her eyes staring up at him, glassy and unseeing.  It makes his stomach lurch, and he reaches down, shutting her eyes quickly. She had begged and pleaded for them to let her go, that she wasn’t dangerous and she just wanted to look after her brother and sick mother. 

“She was just desperate to be with her family,” Seungcheol whispers hoarsely, and Yoongi sighs, looking down at the girl. 

“Take her with us. Her brother doesn’t need to know that she’s gone,” he murmurs, and Seungcheol looks up at him in surprise. “We’ll give her a proper burial.” 

Yoongi pats Seungcheol’s shoulder, handing him a thick blanket, and Seungcheol stares after Yoongi, wondering how he manages to do this for so long, unmoved and unaffected by anything. He does as he’s told, wrapping her up and putting her in the back. He tells Aron that he wants to walk back, and that he just needs some air. His mentor nods understandingly, reminding him to report for their debrief that evening. 

Seungcheol strolls the streets, picking up various snacks and bites as he tries to rid himself of the horrifying images from his mind. He’s so preoccupied he almost doesn’t register the yelling. 

Almost. 

He jerks back to reality, eyes scanning the crowd urgently, trying to find the source of the noise. He doesn’t know how, but the system must have missed one. 

“You know what happened the last time we let one go.” 

The words ring in his ears, and he tries to focus on the sound, frowning when he realizes that it doesn’t sound anything like a predator’s growl. Seungcheol searches anyway, pushing through the small crowd of kids and adults to finally spot the shifter, and he stops dead in his tracks. 

A pomeranian? What the fuck? 

It’s not possible. The only shifters outside the Royal family were predators, what – what was a domestic shifter doing here? 

What the fuck????

To everyone else, all they hear is incessant barking from a small, cute little dog, but Seungcheol understands him perfectly. He scoops up the puppy, carrying him away quickly, thanking the kids for finding his puppy.

The dog barks indignantly, evidently unhappy from being picked up. 

EXCUSE ME, I AM NOT YOUR DOG 

“I can help you, just shut up at trust me,” he whispers, looking around to ensure none of the other guards are around. The Pomeranian stops barking, staring up at him in surprise 

You can understand me??? He barks, and Seungcheol shushes him again. 

“Yes I can, but so can all the other shifter guards. If they find out you exist they’ll kill you without hesitation,” he hisses, and the Pomeranian promptly shuts up. 

“What’s your name?” he murmurs, and the Pomeranian barks once, before burrowing into the little nook in Seungcheol’s arms. 

Jihoon.

Lee Jihoon, 18, Pomeranian

Seungcheol isn't entirely sure what had driven him to go help Jihoon, instead of just reporting him, but it isn’t his fault he was born. He has a faint idea of how the hell Jihoon is a domestic shifter, but he’s afraid of the consequences should his suspicions be proven wrong.

He heads back to the palace as quickly as he can, locking himself in his room and letting Jihoon out from his hiding spot. The pomeranian shakes out his fur, and stares expectantly at Seungcheol. 

“Well? Shift back so we can talk,” he says, and Jihoon shoots him a deadpan look (or as deadpan as a Pomeranian can look), and Seungcheol realizes he doesn’t know how. He panics for a second, then scoops him up again and heads for the only person who might be able to help. 

Crown Prince, Yoon Jeonghan. 

Even before the final test, Seungcheol had been assigned to guard the Crown Prince, solely because they were the same age. The King wished for his son to have someone would be able to keep up with him, and so Seungcheol had been offered up on a silver platter. 

Yoon Jeonghan was as challenging as everyone had cautioned, and to some extent, even more. He was wickedly smart, liked pissing Seungcheol off by sneaking off, and was overall a pain in the ass. But Seungcheol knew he had a good heart, and prayed that he would be able to explain what was happening, or at least show Jihoon how to shift back.

Jeonghan’s in his bedroom, reading a book about Greek Gods when the door slams open, and a disheveled Seungcheol bursts in. 

“I could have you kicked out for intruding like this,” he laughs, setting his book down when he sees how serious Seungcheol looks. “What happened?” he asks, and Seungcheol shuts the door, locking it firmly. 

“Ah ah, it’s a little early to try and seduce me, don’t you think?” he jokes, and Seungcheol makes a choked noise. 

“Y-Your highness I’m sorry for barging in like this but I didn’t know who else to turn to,” Seungcheol murmurs, hesitantly lifting his cape and revealing Jihoon. 

“He’s a – oh,” Jeonghan stares at the Pomeranian, the shock written clear on his face. “But… how?” he whispers, turning to stare at Seungcheol, not wanting to accept the truth staring the both of them in the face. 

“He has no father, mother died in childbirth, raised by his grandmother,” Seungcheol offers quietly, and the prince sucks in a breath. “He also doesn’t know how to shift back.” 

Jeonghan forces out a chuckle, shaking his head slightly. “It’s the first thing we’re taught,” he murmurs, shifting elegantly into his other half before showing Jihoon how to shift back. Seungcheol stands by the door, watching the two of them interact, and eventually Jihoon manages to shift, dark fluffy fur making way for milky white skin. 

“You’re tiny,” Jeonghan coos, and Jihoon looks up, glaring unhappily at Jeonghan. 

“I’m … naked,” he croaks, voice hoarse from underuse. “Wh-what happened? Why the fuck was I a dog?” 

“You’re probably my half brother, or more crudely, the King’s bastard child,” Jeonghan explains bluntly, and Jihoon’s eyes almost widen into saucers. “The Royal family have the ability to shift into domestic animals. An exiled branch of the family shift into predators, which now make up the Royal Guard.” 

Seungcheol stares at Jeonghan disapprovingly, and the crown prince raises an eyebrow at him. “What? Either he knows now and hides his identity, or he dies, we both know those are the only two options,” he shrugs, and Seungcheol can’t find it in him to refute that statement. 

He runs a hand through his hair, thanking Jeonghan quietly when the prince hands Jihoon some clothes, which the younger accepts gratefully. They sit in relative silence, waiting patiently for the new shifter to digest the overload of information. 

“S-so what do I do?” Jihoon eventually asks, glancing at Jeonghan and Seungcheol. Seungcheol shrugs, turning to Jeonghan expectantly, who explains that he either can go back into hiding, which would be incredibly risky, or join the Royal Guard. 

“But I’m not a predator,” he frowns, and Jeonghan waves his concerns away. 

“Don’t worry. You’ll be my personal guard. You’ll need to go through the basics of course, but I’ll spare you from the rest of the more intense training. If Father finds out one of his mistresses had a child, he’d slaughter your entire family just to keep it a secret,” he sighs, and Seungcheol suppresses a shudder, trying not to imagine the lengths the King would go to in order for his dirty secrets to stay silent.

“I need a day,” Jihoon says suddenly, and both Jeonghan and Seungcheol look surprised. “My- My grandmother. She’s raised me this entire time I need to tell her I’m – I’m joining the Royal Guard.” 

Jeonghan grins cheekily, hopping off his bed. “Well then, it’s off to the city we go! This way, you can hide in the car and no one will be any wiser,” he chirps, and Seungcheol rolls his eyes. 

“You just want to see that cafe owner don’t you,” he deadpans, and Jeonghan has the audacity to wink at him, flouncing off to change into something more “appropriate.” 

Jihoon fiddles with the hem of his shirt, trying to shrink into the walls while waiting for his highness. Seungcheol pats the younger’s frail shoulders reassuringly, and he can see some of the tension melting away. 

“We’ll take care of you, promise,” he murmurs, and Jihoon nods silently, still lost in his thoughts. 

Seungcheol can’t help but feel a flutter in his chest, a sense of protectiveness washing over him for the younger, dark haired boy. 

“Thank you hyung,” Jihoon whispers, cheeks flushed a dainty pink against his porcelain skin, and the fluttering suddenly becomes full on pterodactyls. 

Fuck. 

Please like and reblog!

If you’d like more of this AU, or your own lil thing, of if you just wanna yell at me, you can do so here~

[ashes-and-ashes]

So, apparently it has been 6 months since I first started posting my stuff on Tumblr.

6 months! It feels so long and yet so short, all at the same time. Tumblr has become such a huge part of my life now, and I am so grateful that this community is so welcoming and accepting.

I remember when I decided to first write this. I always wanted to post my stuff on Tumblr, always wanted to be able to share my writing, but by God, I was so damn scared. I always made deadlines for myself, “I’ll post over Christmas! I’ll post on my Birthday!”

That was actually the major deadline for me! I always told myself that I’d start posting on my birthday, that it would be like a present to myself. At the time I set that goal for myself (August Something), March 11th seemed so far away, and I was basically procrastinating.

And one day, I was watching he Winter Soldier and I was thinking about Stucky. And it was 12 at night and I don’t know what happened, I just thought to myself, “Screw it. I want to write something and I’m going to post it.”

So I did. I spent 4 hours on this semi-decent fic and I got a grand total of 12 notes. And I was ecstatic because holy shit, 12 people like my stuff?

So I kept going! And now here I am! I think it’s pretty funny that the first thing I ever decided to write was an angsty fic about Stucky and their relationship.

Anyways, here it is down below! Thanks for supporting me, and encouraging me to keep writing! :)

Thoughts

Bucky’s falling, wind whispering in his ears, snow covering his face, the screeching of the train on top of him. A scream rises in his throat, as he stares up at the sky above him.

And suddenly, he’s 9 years old again, cracked shoes and dirty clothes, sitting on top of the swing set in the park. It was a hot day, a dry summer. He sees dead grass drying in the cracks in the pavement, hear the wind whistling through the trees.

And he hears them. There’s Ricky King, 3 years older then him, towering over all the boys in the neighborhood. He’s laughing, a group of older boy around him, all kicking at something hidden in the middle of the throng. Bucky finds himself leaning forwards, trying to catch a glimpse of what lay in the middle. The crowd shifts, and Bucky sees a tiny figure, all bones and cuts and the bluest eyes he’s ever seen. The boy is bleeding, marks all over his face, yet he still pushes himself off the ground, glares at Ricky, and says something that makes Ricky flush and punch him square in the jaw. And Bucky is angry, because surely the boy knows that talking will only get him more hurt? So he sits there, and watches the fight.

After 10 more minutes, the boys leave, and Bucky hops down off the swing set and heads over to check on the boy. He’s curled into a ball, yet when he glances up, his eyes are filled with defiance. Pain fills his every move as he slowly pushes himself to his feet, still glaring at Bucky. And Bucky is speechless, because why would you let yourself be tortured like that?

He doesn’t know what to do, so after a while, he says, “Um...are you ok?” The other boy nods his head, tears welling up in his eyes, desperately trying not to cry. Bucky is still frozen, helpless. He puts his arms around the other boy, because that’s what his mother did when he was sad, and gradually, the boy stops crying. He lets go, looks at the other boy in the eyes and says, “Hi. I’m Bucky.” The other boy smiles back, eyes red from crying, and says softly, “Hi. I’m Steve.”

And they are 13 now, young and careless and rebellious. Steve is still small, bones protruding from his chest and half a foot shorter then everyone else in school. Bucky is taller, broader, dark hair and darker eyes, and they are inseparable. They spend the days at school, learning math and english and science. Afterwards, they go to Steve’s place, into the forest behind his house, and Steve draws and Bucky climbs trees and they are happy. And he’s 13, getting looks from the girls in his class. They giggle, hide behind the gates at recess, and he sometimes hears them whispering when he exits the classroom. He’s confused, because he’s never noticed these things, never noticed anything besides Steve, and he wonders if something is wrong with him.

They’re 14. Bucky is tall, towering over Steve, who is still skin and bones and blue eyes. It’s winter, bitterly cold, and they can’t light the fire because logs cost too much. They lie huddled in the narrow bed, Steve against the wall and Bucky pressing close to him. Steve is barely breathing, his last asthma attack not even 10 minutes ago. He shivers, the movement shaking the entire bed, and Bucky presses closer. He hesitates, because he is 14 and should he really be sharing a bed with his friend? And he hates himself for it, hates that little voice of doubt in his head because Goddamn it, he’s your best friend for Christ sakes Bucky! but he can’t shake the feeling that something’s wrong. He’s noticing things, the curve of Steve’s wrist as he turned the page on the sketch book, the way his hair fell over his face, how his cheekbones and nose casted a shadow over his lips when the sun was in the right place in the sky.

And Bucky is scared, because this wasn’t the way things were supposed to be like? He almost edges away from the sleeping figure of Steve, but another wave of coughing overwhelms Steve’s thin body, and Bucky is back to his old spot on the bed. He reaches over, wraps an arm around Steve’s bony ones and holds him tight.

And they are 15, and Steve still can’t fade from Bucky’s mind. He tries to hide it, destroy it, burry it with wine and women and dancing. He takes his shoes, shines them until you couldn’t see the cracks in them, smiles to hide the holes in his heart. He spends the days working at the docks, hauling box after box after box. The money is barely enough to get by, the work exhausting, but Bucky can’t quit, because he now has to support not only himself, but Steve as well.

And it hurts. Everyday, 5 in the morning until 7 at night, hauling boxes and tying knots, until his back is screaming and his fingers are bloody. He waits outside of the apartment that him and Steve share, looking at himself in the shard of mirror hanging outside of the front door, pasting a smile on his face and he clenches his teeth hard. He knows that if he breaks down, Steve would be out on the streets, and he would not, could not abandon Steve. He’s 15, working his ass off, trying to support 2 orphans, and still when he falls asleep, all he can see are Steve’s blue eyes in his dreams.

They are 16, the world going to absolute shit around them, and all Steve wants to do is fight for his country. “They are ENSLAVING people over their Buck,” he says one evening, glaring at the radio set in front of them. “I need to help. I can’t...I can’t just stay here and do nothing!”

Dread pools in Bucky’s stomach, because how can he protect Steve if he is somewhere in a goddamn war zone? but he holds it together, smiles, manages a small “calm down pip-squeak,” and exits the room.

He’s scared, because he knows that while the army may never take Steve, they’d sure as hell take him, and then Steve would be on his own. He can’t handle that, the thought of leaving for some separate country, and never seeing Steve again. It’s worse though, because despite all that’s happened, he can’t stop having those dreams. Dreams of Steve’s hands on his body, and those blue eyes, and kissing him, Bucky’s hands tangling in his hair. He’s disgusted with himself, knows that this is wrong, but he can’t decide if he is relieved or wrecked that he may leave without ever telling Steve Rogers the words I love you.

They are 17, now, the war still raging around them. They’ve been lucky so far, but Bucky knows that this luck can’t hold for much longer. Steve is at the recruiting station everyday, a different state on his form every time, and yet all Bucky can do is stare at the envelope placed in front of him at work. His name is printed in bold letters on the paper, James Buchanan Barnes, and the only thing that runs through Bucky’s head is Steve. Because the day had finally come, the clock had run out. He knew that they were on borrowed time, knew that every moment was another moment lost, but goddamn him, he thought they would have more of it. And he knows he’s going to die there, die without ever saying goodbye to Steve, and he can’t think, his breath coming in tight bursts. He stands up, shoves his chair underneath the table with a violent jerk, and somehow he is standing outside the apartment, in his uniform, his hat cocked to one side, and trying not to fall apart.

He opens the door, finds the window open and sees a note saying On Roof. He climbs out the window, sees Steve on the roof, and his heart catches in his throat because he is so freaking beautiful, all golden and shadows, and all he wants to do is to kiss him. Steve comes over, smiling, greets him with a simple “Hey Buck.”

He leans over, puts his arm around Bucky, and Bucky feels his heart hammering in his chest. Steve notices this, turns his head towards Bucky, a confused expression on his face and goddamn him in hell, but Bucky can’t take it. They are only a short distance apart, and Bucky leans forwards and meets Steve’s lips with his own.

And Steve stiffens for a moment, and Bucky nearly pulls away, petrified because shit, shit, shit what if he didn’t like me in that way?? And he is about to apologize, beg his forgiveness when Steve pulls him closer and kisses him again.

They are 2 boys, rain pouring down on top of them, buckets and buckets of it, and yet all either of them can do is breathe each other in. And Bucky pulled away, looking at Steve Rogers in the eyes, and thinks how can I let this go?

And as Bucky falls, he remembers. Days and days of golden summer, crisp fall. Lying in beds as boys, pressing Steve against his body. Sitting in trees, Steve drawing and Bucky reading. Snowball fights and sleepovers and campfires and how the light reflected off of Steve’s face. 2 boys kissing on the rooftop, not giving a damn what others thought as the skies opened on top of them. And he was grateful. Grateful for all that stolen time, those early days and late nights, that hot summer day long ago, because without Steve, Bucky knew that his life would be meaningless.

So Bucky fell, thousands of miles off a steel train, and the last thing he saw was the blue eyes of the boy he loved best.

[perfackles]

15 Questions 15 Mutuals

Tagged by @gracefuldean​ THANK YOU :3

1. Are you named after anyone?

My dad’s mother, who was a total badass. 

2. When was the last time you cried?

Haaa like every other hour since Friday really? I was in a car accident Friday morning, someone went into the back of my car while I was in stationary traffic, and my car is now being scrapped because the damage was so bad. Between the shaking and the rage that the idiot was driving so badly I’ve not been my best self. But I’ll get there, eventually. (arghhh the car was only four months old I’m gonna be angry and upset about this a long time). 

3. Do you have kids?

Nope!

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

Yes, and also no. But a lot of the time even when I’m not being sarcastic people think I am so...!  

5. What’s the first thing you notice about people?

I’ve thought about this long and hard and probably cheeks? Maybe it is actually eyes but cheeks always seem to stick out at me. 

6. What’s your eye colour?

weird grey-y blue 

7. Scary movie or happy ending?

Happy ending!!! In every sense of the phrase. Just how I like my fanfic too. 

8. Any special talents?

I can touchtype pretty fast, does that count? like 112 words a minute when I’m really in da flow straight copying. 

9. Where were you born?

Englanddddd

10. What are your hobbies?

Procrastinating, reading, a lot of reading. Making people sad with headcanons. 

11. Have any pets?

I have a 13 year old puppy dog by the name of Holly. I love her so much. 

12. What sports have you or do you play?

I used to play so much rounders and I miss playing it a lot. Weird little British sport. 

13. How tall are you?

5′7″

14. Favourite school subject?

Biology and English lit. 

15. Dream job?

I quite like what I’m doing right now but if I’m going to have a fantasy job: buying stuff on behalf of rich and famous people. I want to pick out Robert Downey Jr’s clothes for the next year please. 

I have no idea who would be interested in doing this so tagging the last few people I spoke to on here =D 

@wearingmywings @oddsocksandstuff @omgbubblesomg @bend-me-shape-me @helianthus21 @caffeinaships @hexmaniacchoco 

[bohemian-rhapsody-in-blue]

Hi, this is for the autumn ask:

🍵💻🍁

I hope you have a good day 🙃

Thank you so much! And sorry for the lateness in answering—I got hit with an annoying cold, like, right after I reblogged the post and had to nap and rest all day. It’s still affecting me, but I feel a bit better now—I hope that today turns out to be better, and I thank you for your well wishes!

Now, without further ado:

🍵 Top 3 favorite tea flavors?

Right now, my absolute favorite tea is an instant ginger chai that my roommate has, because it’s working wonders for my sore throat. (No, I won’t shut up about this cold…)

Interestingly, I was never much of a tea drinker before this year (I’m sorry, Uncle Iroh), but thanks to my roommate and the many college events I’ve gone to that serve tea, I’m learning to develop more of a taste for it! I’d say my top three favorites right now are the aforementioned ginger chai, green tea, and I guess peppermint tea. I’ve tried earl grey, too, but I don’t like it as much. (I’m sorry, Captain Picard.)

💻 To feel nostalgic: what are some old games/websites you spent lots of time on when you were young?

I don’t know if anyone else but me remembers this, but: htwins.net! This was the website that hosted the famous Scale of the Universe 2 and belonged to the people who made Battle for Dream Island, but I didn’t stop there. Oh no. I played all the games and watched all the animations that these funky Huang twins made: Get to the Top Although There Is No Top (and its 100 variations!), Goime 500 (there were parts of that that stumped me for months; after I eventually figured it out and beat the game, that’s what introduced me to the concept of a speedrun); even The Super-Short Stick Figure Show! A lot of these have sadly been lost to time since the demise of Flash…RIP.

I remember being shooketh when I found out how young the programmers/animators, Cary and Michael, were—they were only 12 when they produced, animated, and released the first episode of Battle for Dream Island and 14 when they released The Scale of the Universe 2. Imagine having that much talent! I still follow some of Cary’s videos—he also composes quite well and, in high school, apparently wrote poems of questionable quality.

On the cringier side of things, I also spent an embarrassing amount of time on websites like RageStache (rage comics) and Taste of Awesome (demotivational posters). I was addicted to those—I’d spend hours scrolling through the comics and memes while procrastinating on doing my 5th- or 6th-grade homework, probably learning stuff I shouldn’t have been learning at the innocent young age of 10. I’d also often Google Image Search things like “funny comics about harry potter” (Harry Potter being my obsession at the time), “funny rage comics about ___,” and “funny tumblr conversations”—years before I’d actually join Tumblr.

🍁 A new website, fandom, video, song, fun fact or anything, name a recent discovery you would like to share with your followers.

Apologies for “blorbo from my shows”-ing this, but here are two amazing Cowboy Bebop-related discoveries I’ve made recently!

The first is this bonus track from the boxed set of the Cowboy Bebop soundtrack; here is the Wiki page for it with the lyrics translated into English. It’s called “Wandering Cowboy,” and it’s a version/arrangement of the theme song, Tank!, with lyrics sung by Aoi Tada, the Japanese voice of Edward. The lyrics and the way little Ed sings them (Aoi Tada was a teenager, not much older than Ed, when she recorded her lines for the original series) are just so adorable—innocent, childlike, and filled with love for her Bebop family. I can just imagine Ed sitting or lying at her computer in the Bebop’s living room, kicking her feet behind her as she softly and happily sings this under her breath. Go, go, Bebop! Fly, fly, Bebop!

And the second is this video of Canadian figure skater Kevin Reynolds, who in 2016 skated a routine at the Skate Canada Challenge to Tank! while dressed as Spike Spiegel. Just imagine being that cool. Imagine being a fan of Cowboy Bebop and also a figure skater. Imagine practicing for months and months and years and years to do a strenuous, beautiful skating routine, and it all culminates in you being Spike Spiegel, being him in front of everyone, whirling and spinning across the ice to the frenetic jazz of Tank!, of a show you’ve obviously known and loved for years—as graceful and fluid as Spike himself is in his movements, literally moving like water. I just have many emotions about this. (Also, Kevin Reynolds is cute! He has a sweet smile and thumbs-up :))

[Autumn Emoji Asks]

[angelicspaceprince]

Saving Lucifer

Author: Anna

Title: Saving Lucifer

Pairing: Gabriel/Reader, brother!Lucifer/Gabriel

Character/s: Gabriel, Castiel, unnamed demons, Lucifer

Word Count: 2, 485 words

Warnings/Tags: PTSD, Lulu not being very sneaky, angry Lulu, brotherly Lulu, this caused me tears, I use Maccas references because I was tired when I wrote this....

Summary: Set during 'Saving Loki', Lucifer could not imagine the sort of pain Gabriel was forced to experience, but during his time sneaking around your home and observing the two of you, he had formed some kind of idea. If he wasn't so impressed with the way you were handling it, he was sure there would be a massacre. Afterall, anyone who dares to harm his brother deserves the worst kind of death.

Notes: So....because I'm a dork, I anonymously messaged thewhiterabbit42 about writing a fic where Lucifer gets pissed and destroys everything in a rage because #brotherlylove but it came out NOTHING LIKE I WANTED IT TO. Anyway, hope you enjoy it in any case because I'm just procrastinating writing the official Part 3 of this series hereby dubbed 'Saving Grace' but I'm hoping it'll be out soon.

Also, someone requested a fic about Gabe and the reader's life prior to McFuckFace's and was wondering if anyone else was interested? If I get enough interest in it, then I'll write it either before or after Saving Grace...I have thought about adding a french maid outfit into it because elyshakate is a bitch who gives me so many ideas. Love you but God I hate you babe.

Tags: oddone92, thewhiterabbit42 elyshakate, authoressskr micas-dont-like-rain, vitosfangirl, lilacprincessofrecovery, angelus320, fanfictionandjunk, 69percentgay, rls905, thepallaspalace, duckgirl16, thoughtfullyoptimisticgalaxy, spearqueenbean, stardustinherhair, saltvattenshar, iamrebeccasblog, ever-faithful-sidekick, govaliantblizzardprincess, pinkypie9211, djpaige13paige, spookysculderfiles - if you want to be tagged (or I've accidentally put you on the wrong tag list) message me to let me know!

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Saving Lucifer

  To say Lucifer was pissed would be an understatement. Looking over his sleeping brother as he twitches and twists in silent terror, clearly his dreams haunting him.

He shouldn’t be dreaming at all. He’s an archangel, sleeping was a human custom that Lucifer never saw the benefit of. But for the past three nights that he has silently observed his terrified brother, it was evident that he was exhausted by the smallest of tasks to the point where he required multiple nights plus a good six to eight hours of sleep overnight. Not that it helped with anything, every moment of every day he was terrified.

His girlfriend was patient, possibly more patient than he would have been. If he had been the one to take care of him, he would have ripped out those blasted stitches from his mouth the moment he saw him. But you? You appeared to be calm, although the rants to muttered to yourself when you thought no one was around suggested otherwise. You approached him with certainty and never stopped speaking, words soft and reassuring. The one time you properly freaked him out, you adjusted quickly. You hid all the sharps that were freaking him out and didn’t even talk about removing his stitches, even though he knew you were dying to. He didn’t need to listen in to the conversations you held with yourself to know that.

The thing that shocked him was the amount of space you gave him. You allowed him to dictate the space he needed when he needed to alone, pretty much everything. You got him to shower without touching him, encouraging him to do things like stand by the window in the sun or watch the TV. He had taken a liking to ‘Scooby Do, Where Are You?’ Lucifer had found, which amused him greatly.

You never touched him, which was shocking. Humans were such tactile creatures, with very few exceptions. He figured that you would have treated him with more….hands on measures than what you currently were undertaking. Don’t get him wrong, he knew that you were desperate to be able to at the very least touch his hand. The few rare moments you snuck into Gabriel’s room during particularly bad nightmares during his naps and overnight to stroke his hair and kiss his forehead as you leave to calm him down enough to sleep left him feeling….comfortable with him in your care.

Not that anyone, no matter how long they tortured him for, would be able to make him confess that.

The thing that got him about you, however, was that no matter how much you wanted to, you didn’t contact those damned Winchester brothers and their pet angel. You were tempted, by his Father you were tempted. But you never went through with it, never getting past typing the first word or first three numbers of their cells before you quickly deleted it and the idea from your mind.

He had come to respect you for that.

He supposed he could leave. The past three days have been…eventful, but he knew he could trust you with the care of his broken but slowly repairing brother.

But he couldn’t.

Not if there was a slim chance that his brother needed him.

So those three days turned into three weeks, three months. He found that you quickly found ways to help Gabriel cope, knocking softly on all the doors until you heard a faint grunt instead of shouting out that you were home, humming and quietly singing to yourself whenever he was in the room in an effort to keep him calm, setting up silent alarms to inform you if he was having an ‘attack’, as you called it, so you could go and talk to him.

Sometimes it would be about your day, others comforting and encouraging him, and others it was the memories of your relationship before this all happened. Funny stories that made him laugh, sad ones that made him close to tears (no, not a single one fell and if anyone saw that, they were lying and were going to be tortured for the rest of eternity). If Lucifer felt guilt over the ‘death’ of his brother back in that stupid hotel filled with the Pagans, after hearing Y/N’s account of the event? For the first time in his life, Lucifer felt guilty and horror over his actions.

He began to respect you, even though you were human. Out of all the apes he had encountered, you were definitely fast becoming his favourite. Clearly, you loved his brother and were good for – and to – him.

When your first major breakthrough occurred, he nearly jumped for joy. Gabriel had broken some unimportant item and when you released that perhaps a garden would be a good idea for him, you struck a deal. Very cunningly too, he thought, even if it wasn’t your intention.

The stitches were out and Gabriel got to go outside. He laughed lightly when you lost him only to find him plastered all over the cake display unit like a three-year-old.

Only Gabriel.

He still didn’t speak, but the garden looked amazing and Lucifer was impressed how much it helped his brother. He had always loved nature, and this was a fantastic way to bring him back to the present when the past caught up to him.

Lucifer didn’t, however, truly lose it until he saw his brother’s wings.

Decaying, broken, revolting, pus-filled wings that were not even a tenth of what they once were. Lucifer’s wings had been dying since the day he fell, and slowly becoming more and more hellish, but Gabriel’s? After a few months Earth time in Hell? Were way worse.

He didn’t stay to see the grooming process, he very quickly found the demons responsible for that particular part of Gabriel’s torture and proceeded to very slowly, very painfully, kill all six of them. Not one let him know the ringleader of this entire event, but as long as the six of them paid for nearly killing his brother with their antics, he truly didn’t care.

When the boys came to visit, he nearly lost his mind with how far back Gabriel retreated. Y/N handled the situation with grace and care, keeping calm as she instructed the boys on what to do. The look on Castiel’s face confirmed what Lucifer already knew, he had no idea Gabriel was back.

You managed to calm Gabriel with ease, something that Lucifer was always incredibly amazed at. Even when Gabriel was small, once he was worked up in any way, shape or form, he was incredibly difficult to calm down.

When you found him in your room, the both of you were slightly surprised, but you did well to hide it and went in to talk to him about random things about your childhood, several things you had spoken to him about before but Lucifer gathered that you had only had a tiny existence on this earth in comparison to the two archangels in the room so you probably ran out of stories quick.

What surprised Lucifer most of all was how, eventually, Gabriel had moved to be next to you, carefully avoiding all the shattered glass and ceramics so his legs are millimeters from touching yours. Your voice falters before stopping as he grabs your hand, squeezing it gently, and Lucifer’s eyes widened slightly in disbelief at the first contact he had witnessed where Gabriel initiated it himself without prompting. When he got up to clean the mess he had created, Lucifer’s attention drew to you.

Your exterior looked calm as always, but your eyes showed your mind running and racing, planning ahead, trying to figure out a way to introduce Gabriel to Cassie and the boys without a freakout.

So, when you woke up from a nightmare that night, he wasn’t surprised. Lucifer still didn’t see the benefit of sleeping, especially when the two people he has observed sleeping were seemingly being tortured as they did so.

He knew your routine by now. He would be a liar if he said he didn’t find it curious the way you automatically went through your checklist. Breathe deep, meditate, wash your face, have a drink, sleep. He did it alongside with you numerous times to see the benefit but never figured it out. When you looked around your bathroom’s bench confused, trying to find your glass, he wasn’t amused. Not in the slightest.

After all, a sleep-deprived you is not a funny you.

When it clicked and you decided to go down to the kitchen to get a new cup, Lucifer decided to go see how his brother was faring.

He wasn’t in his room.

Panic rises in him as he quickly looks around the second floor of the house. Gabriel had ‘ran away’ early after his stitches were removed, but you found him with ease (in fact, you didn’t even panic. Just stood up, walked out to the car and returned twenty minutes later with a shivering Gabriel), and since then if Lucifer couldn’t find him immediately, his stomach would drop.

He rushes downstairs with such speed that when he grinds to a halt, he slides across the wooden floor right past the living room and into the kitchen where you are standing, staring at the faint glow emitting from the garden room.

The both of you walk in slowly and the grin on your face when you saw the messy and unidentifiable structure constructed of pillows, blankets and fairy lights caused Lucifer to calm down.

When you got down on your knees and crawled into the opening, Lucifer followed in suit. There is where he found his brother, sleeping softly for the first time since Lucifer had seen him sleep, in a nest of cushions and blankets from around the house, breathing evenly and softly. You kneel by him, hands moving to play with his hair, almost with minds of their own, before thinking better of it and resting in your lap. Lucifer wasn’t even sure you were aware of this, you did it often. He figured it was your body remembering the way you used to be able to act around him, prior to McChicken Fried Fuck as you so lovingly call his creation. Humans weren’t awfully creative, but they are amusing.

When Gabriel’s eyes suddenly opened and locked onto yours, you muttered an apology and quickly made way to exit when Gabriel opened his mouth to protest.

‘Stay. Please.’

If Lucifer had a heart, it would be broken.

He knew that Gabriel had been talking for a few days now, hearing you get excited whenever you marked his progress out loud when you were beginning to think that he was never going to get better. But he never expected his voice to be so…. broken.

Gone was confident, sarcastic, joking Gabriel and in his stead was someone Lucifer didn’t know. Even his begging tone that was hinted in his voice as he asks you to stay was foreign. Lucifer truly didn’t know how to feel.

When Gabriel told you he loved you, Lucifer decided it was enough feelings for him for one day and left the two of you in the glowing blanket heap. After all, the two of you probably deserved some alone time. And McChicken Fried Fuck wasn’t going to torture himself.

~~~

Gabriel was having another nightmare.

This was a regular occurrence, and he wasn’t quite ready to move into the same bed as you even though the two of you often slept in the mass of blankets and pillows in the garden room. Perhaps it was too personal to Gabriel or reminded him too much of what life was before all of….this.

You were forced to leave the house for a hunt, rogue angels had found out that Gabriel was, in fact, alive and wanted to use the remainder of his grace to create more angels. Lucifer was too weak to fight, and if his brother had faith in you then he did too. Besides. If the angels got hold of two weakened archangels, who knows the havoc they’d create? Lucifer loved his brothers and sisters, but he’d be the first to admit that the majority of them were dumb as rocks.

So, with you on protection detail, that left him in the reassurance aisle, something he hadn’t done in a long, long time.

Lucifer sets forward, cooing in Enochian, pulling forward a long-forgotten lullaby he used to sing to his brother. He could see it slowly calming Gabriel down until his breathing evened. Lucifer felt a rare smile grace his lips. He was going to be alright.

‘I know you’re there.’ Gabriel’s once-confident voice rings through his head.

‘I’m not surprised. How long?’ He responds quietly, projecting his voice softly into Gabriel’s mind. He doesn’t even wince.

‘Since I showed Y/N my wings. You weren’t so quiet when you left. You’re not as sneaky as you once were, Lulu.’ The teasing ton is there faintly, but there. Lucifer smiles.

‘I blame old age.’ He could hear his brother’s laughter as his shoulders shake in amusement. ‘Why didn’t you tell Y/N?’

‘I didn’t want to lose you or her.’ He admits. ‘I thought if I told her that I would have had to have given one of you up.’ Lucifer hums as he moves to stand. ‘Stay?’ His voice is desperate as it calls out to him. ‘Please?’

For the first time since they were fledglings, Lucifer pulls Gabriel into his lap, wings forming to cover the two of them in a safe, enclosed space, away from the world. Gabriel sniffles as he gets comfortable in his brother’s lap. ‘Missed you, Luce.’

‘Missed you too.’

Since the Fall, Lucifer refused to let his guard down. But, he felt comfortable doing so now, body calm and relaxed. He was safe. He felt….he didn’t know what he felt it was a new sensation, as if his body was being pulled down into the mattress but in a comforting way?

‘Drowsiness, Lulu, you’re falling asleep.’ Gabriel gently informs him. Lucifer hums as he slowly begins to fall. ‘Thank you.’

‘For what?’

‘For saving me too.’

‘Thank you.’

‘For what?’

‘For letting me be your brother again.’

~~~

When you walk in the room the next morning to find two sleeping archangels, you didn’t even blink. You knew Lucifer was near, or at least some form of angel. Weird little things like food when you hadn’t been shopping or the TV suddenly turning onto a show Gabriel would like whenever he was in too much of a state to work the remote clued you in. So, when this scene greets your eyes, you simply smile and shut the door.

Best to leave your archangel and his guardian alone to sleep for a while longer.

[hot-mysticc-mess-blog]

I love your blog and I was wondering if you could write a headcanon for the RFA+V&Saeran when they see MC who they broke up with for something in the past. Like they miss her and want her, so how would they try to win her back. I'm sorry if I'm being a bit confusing.

My Masterlist

Zen

His contract to keep your relationship quiet, a new fantastic role, a rough patch he knows, in hindsight, was his fault.

He doesn’t really remember but he thinks your last argument was something about fish-shaped bread? How stupid.

It was awkward for a while. Zen used to leave the chatroom anytime you showed up, until you offered to leave in his place

He felt so guilty about it that he always stuck around, lamenting logging into the chatroom in case he found himself trapped watching you chat happily with everyone else

You seemed like you were doing so well

Even after that, the two of you ignored each other for the most part

He texted Yoosung party guest suggestions and made the poor boy ask in Zen’s place, even though he knew you were too nice to turn down a guest just because the suggestion came from your ex

He mellowed out as things got better in his career. He found a new girlfriend. She was pretty, and content with anything she could have of him, even if that did not include his love.

But you still saw each other at the party, and he was still absolutely taken with you

He caught himself staring, his eyes following as you moved throughout the room

A few drinks later and he was itching to touch you, kiss you, beg for your forgiveness

Would that be cheating?

Zen turned to his girlfriend. She caught his eye and smiled.

It would? Damn

His relationship lasted all of another two weeks before he broke it off

Zen tentatively starts conversations with you, notably reserved. Yoosung even mentioned the sharp drop-off in his narcissistic comments.

He spent every spare moment rehearsing the speech he was going to give you. And he waited, for the perfect moment.

Could he have texted you at any time? Or called? Absolutely.

But no, the perfect moment came at 3 AM one evening. Yoosung had just left the chatroom to play games, and Zen was just about to hit the exit button when your name popped up on screen

He spewed out his speech, taking up nearly three whole screens of the chat…and then he couldn’t stop

He just kept on babbling, whatever words he could think of that might get you to come back to him.

Jaehee

Nothing like internalized religious shame to ruin a relationship

It was always something she had fought with, but over time it became too much and she gave in

She was being too greedy, and it would hurt both of you in the end.

Your break-up was a quiet, soft discussion over coffee at table 7

Jaehee already did most of the administrative tasks for the cafe, but she took over what was left

She opened the cafe in the morning. You closed the cafe in the evenings. A manager relayed any communications.

You had never told the rest of the RFA you were together in the first place, and the breakup was somehow even more awkward for it

Things went back to the way they were…except not. It was like peeling a sticker from a bottle only to find that the invisible sticky residue had been left behind.

Jaehee was professional as always, you were polite as always, but everything hurt

The rest of the RFA noticed the gloom, Seven put the pieces together easily enough. Jumin at the very least suspected, which you put together when he offered both of you vague but particularly relevant advice

Jaehee immediately noticed how much she misses your presence

Running the cafe wasn’t half as much fun without you

Sitting at home and watching Zen’s musicals was still very relaxing…but not as enjoyable when she doesn’t have you to enjoy them with

She swears even her coffee isn’t as flavorful when you aren’t around.

She found herself up at wee hours of the morning most nights, looking at the crucifix up on her wall.

“Is this really what you want?” She asked, out loud to an empty house.  

She finally found happiness…why was she sabotaging it for herself?

The next day she came by right at the end of your shift, clinging to a clipboard with the inventory documents in order to avoid anxiously fidgeting.

“MC?” Her voice came out more unsure than she had hoped for. “Would you mind have a cup of coffee with me?”

Audibly sighed with relief when you agreed

She waits until the awkward silence takes over before speaking

“I think, no, I made a mistake when I broke up with you. I thought I was doing the right thing at the time, that I was being too greedy by wanting the coffee shop and such a close relationship with you. I should have just spoken with you about it. You were the one who made me want to chase my happiness, and I wanted to build this cafe with you, together. My life is better with you by my side.”

“Of course, I understand if you don’t want to but I…I would like to try again.”

Yoosung

The process of breaking up was a messy, three weeks of arguing. The actual break-up lasted all of twenty-four hours

School was hard, and you understood that, but he was irritable all the time

Everything that everyone did annoyed him and you two found yourselves arguing over anything he looked at

He brought your fights into the chat room, even when you tried to keep negative conversation to private texts

You suggested maybe he should take a break

He took that phrase, and interpreted it to mean something you hadn’t intended at all. “If we need to take a break, then we shouldn’t be together at all! We’re done!”

Yoosung had about twenty-four hours of rage-based satisfaction before your absence caught up to him

By then, the RFA found out from you what happened.

Zen was torn between his closest friend and you. You told him you would be alright, and that he did not need to come and see you

That was good, because Yoosung arrived at Zen’s apartment 10 minutes later.

Zen updated the chatroom later that evening, letting everyone know Yoosung drank a can of beer, cried, and then Zen put him to bed on the couch

Yoosung was back up again at three am, alone in a chatroom frantically typing out how much he missed you while he paced in Zen’s living room

Then he started calling

You woke up to several voicemails, all apologies from Yoosung

Jumin

He swore he would never let you go. Even when things were bad he couldn’t bring himself to get a divorce

Instead, the two of you separated. Though he felt he could no longer provide support for your emotional well-being, he offered his continued financial support.

The polite refusal you gave him, tears in your eyes and hands on your suitcase, made his chest tighten. He loosened his tie, hoping that would make it feel easier to breathe.

Zen spent the next week with you in Rika’s apartment, doting on your every need and bitching about Jumin every chance he got

Jumin threw himself into his work

He went back to treating you professionally. Seven made the mistake of joking about your newly single status only once before he discovered Jumin’s wrath was not worth it.

You spent the next several months trying to untangle your life from Jumin’s, knowing it would never fully work

Jumin tried to convince himself things would be okay without you. Love was a foolish endeavor. Work was the only thing that mattered.

But you had changed him, and now all of a sudden the idea of going back to a life without love, without the light you brought into his life make his heart ache.

Jaehee took over any communication that involved you, relaying any questions and information Jumin needed.

He made sure that was nothing for the first couple of months, even to the point of procrastinating on things that needed to be done just so he could avoiding saying your name

There were little things you left all around the house by accident. He couldn’t go anywhere without being reminded of you. He left them alone at first, refusing to touch them. If it was in the path of somewhere he needed to go, he had a maid remove it.

Slowly, he started gathering them all up. Whenever he would find something that was yours, he would store it in a box he kept on nightstand on your side of the bed. One day, he would send it to you.

The party came around. The entire RFA is on edge, anxious about the two of you seeing each other for the first time in nearly a year.

Seven helped you get ready beforehand. He made sure you looked great, even without Jumin’s designer gowns and personal stylists.

Jumin had never sent you the box with the last of your things, nor any divorce papers.

Yoosung and Seven had far too much fun pretending to “scout” for you, checking the entire venue for Jumin before you go inside. When he arrived, you knew because your cell phone vibrated four consecutive times with text alerts from the other RFA members

Jumin caught your eye a couple of times, you look away and continue your mingling, but the moment he saw you he knew exactly why he had never fully ended things with you: he never wanted your relationship to end

Those vows he took at the alter when he married you, he meant every word. A year of separation and all the arguments in the world would never change that. He wanted to fix things…but did you?

Jumin kept an eye on you while he networked with other guests, until he finally saw you wander to a quieter corner of the main room for a brief respite.

He ended the conversation he was having rather abruptly, in favor of approaching you with two glasses of wine in hand.

“MC?” He held out one of the glasses for you. “Would you be willing to try couple’s therapy?”

Saeyoung

He thought he could keep you safe from the agency. You were the one who made him believe that

And he could, from his original agency, but then a new agency started to recruit him just as he was getting his civilian life with you in place.

The two of you were engaged now…but if you got married, then your bond would be on paper.

He let his thoughts spiral, panicked one evening at the third attempt to infiltrate his security systems. It didn’t work, of course, but the potential threat was still there.

He pre-packed your things, set up a tracker on your phone, and arranged a Buber to take you to Jumin’s penthouse

The break up was quick. You were in the car and moved out of the house before you had time to process anything that happened.

After you two break up, Saeyoung went quiet.

No one knew if he was actually reading the chat logs at all, but the entire RFA spoke out, asking him to talk to you, to explain what happened, eventually just to say anything

Saeyoung spoke only with Jumin, and did all his work from behind the scenes.

Saeran gave semi-regular updates on his brother in the chatroom after reading the third chat log of you begging to know if he was okay. His brother’s relationship shouldn’t have been any of his business, but he liked you. You were a good person, and no one seemed to understand why Saeyoung did it.

Your role in the RFA only grew. It was rough at first, but the entire RFA was supportive in helping you get back on your feet.

Saeyoung read all the chat logs, including the messages you left for him. He kept an eye on where you were at all times, back to checking on you every 2.35 seconds in his bunker. He made sure to never look you in the eyes, lest it break his resolve.

Saeran lived with him now, but the house was quiet without you around. The twins’ relationship was still tense, but this had just made it worse.

At first, it was just more petty arguments than usual. Then, Saeran started asking why Saeyoung left MC. When Saeyoung wouldn’t answer, it became constant displeased grumbling every time they passed each other. Eventually, it became an outright fight.

“They didn’t do a damn thing and you left them! You left them just like you left me!”

“It’s for her protection Saeran! I took took care of my agency, but if we get married they’re going to be a target for anyone that wants our skills!”

“Did something happen? Did you even talk to them about this!? Why didn’t you ask me for help?”

“I don’t need help. If I told them why I wanted to end things, they wouldn’t have let me do it. It was for their safety. This was the best option.”

“And how did your idea of ‘the best option’ work out for everyone last time!?” Saeran slams his hand down on Saeyoung’s desk, knocking over a long cat bobble toy you had given him as a gift. Saeran’s eyes welled with tears, hands shaking with rage. “MC knew exactly what they were getting into! You had no right to just kick them out of our lives!”

Saeyoung looks up at his brother with wide eyes. Was this what you looked like right now too? Was that the expression and the emotion and the reality that he had been avoiding?

The next day he showed up with a eleven robotic roses that meowed like cats, an IOU for a kitten, and one rose that played a recording of him saying ‘I’m sorry’ over and over again

The sound was awful

Not his best idea

V/ Jihyun

He was the one who decided he was not okay with making you wait

It had been two years of barely keeping in contact

Another cancelled ticket. Another stub for the scrapbook. Another RFA party he would miss, not that he did anything for the group anymore.

You had been amazingly understanding, as usual, even when he broke your heart.

Yoosung already hated him. Jumin was getting a little frustrated, and the rest of the RFA expected him to never really come back. Him breaking up with you? You were the only one particularly heart-broken by the loss.

Everywhere he went, he saw you. Greece, Africa, The United States, Egypt. No matter what country he was in he would see someone on the street and for a few seconds he would be convinced it was you.

God knows how many times he whipped around in the middle of the street only to find himself staring at someone who was…decidedly not you.

Until one day, on a brief return to Korea, when he whipped around and he swore he saw your face. Not the back of your head, not you hands or your clothes, your face.  

“MC?”

You turn to look at him, surprised to see him after all these years.

At first, it just starts with an invitation to a cafe

He’s friendly and kind and apologizes for how things went between the two of you

Of course he wants you back, but he’s not going to force it. He was the one who broke the two of you up to begin with, and he has done nothing to earn your respect or love.

So…he stayed. And he texted. And he logged on to the RFA app to speak with all the members. He rented a studio and slept there on a couch in the back room while he put a life back together in Korea.

Things still aren’t perfect, but he’s trying. He has a place here, and friends, a life he can offer to share now.

He waits until the next RFA party ends, and catches you as you stow away one of the crystal centerpieces for the tables.

“I hope I’m not ruining you evening with this request…would you want to go out on a date with me?”

Saeran

The two of you started your relationship way too early.

He thought he was better now, that he could just live his life

But one day, the feelings hit him hard, like a ton of bricks. All of the progress, all of the work he did to get himself back where he was disappeared.

What was the point? What was the point of trying when it was all going to come back with no warning for the rest of his life?

He doesn’t even remember exactly when he broke up with you, because you never left his side.

It was somewhere between not eating for two days and Saeyoung checking him back into the psychiatric hospital.

“Go home already!” He would shout. You had no idea why, he had been okay with you here just a moment before.

It was because he noticed the glimmer of sadness in your eyes, or the way your expression drooped with disappointment.

Eventually, he got better. They released him from the hospital, but you stopped coming by so often.

It used to be you were there every single day, now you come  by sometimes to talk to Saeyoung, and check in on him briefly before you flee the bunker.

You got eerily quiet in the chatroom; even when he wasn’t around, you just weren’t quite as bright as you had been

He missed seeing you smile. He missed hearing your voice.

It’s another night of being up at three am. Another night of Saeyoung hovering around him, like if he looks away Saeran might try to hurt himself again.

An infomercial for some terrible super fruit health drink is on, and it reminds him of the time he tapped your shoulder to tell you his snarky comment about it, only to find you had fallen asleep on his shoulder.

You were the best thing to ever happen to him

He picks up his phone, and opens the text log.

i’m sorry for what I said

I wish you’d come by more often

I miss you

[tea4life707-blog]

“The Boy Who Broke Through His Ice”

Hi everyone! Okay so basically in English class recently, we had to write short stories based on themes in a book we read. I don’t actually write stories or anything, but since I’m BnHA trash now I thought, why not write a very bleak fan fiction about Todoroki angst??  So I wrote this short story and it’s only around 1,400 words, so please feel free to read if you would like~^^ Synopsis: Boy shut away and trapped in his life with his father finds a new freedom in another person and discovers himself along with his desire to escape his reality. It’s actually a tododeku fanfic AU set at the beach but shhhh my teacher doesn’t know that

I used a bit of imagery with ice and fire in it because it’s apart of expressing Todoroki breaking out of his shell, and also how Midoriya’s warmth encourages him to do so. I didn’t name the characters as well because I wanted to keep it as a sort of universal story, but it’s actually mostly because I needed to stay under the radar from my teacher haha. Can’t let myself be exposed lmao ~Be warned it’s a bit angsty but not too bad~

Enjoy :)

The boy sat in the dark corner of his room, his head in his hands. His father was on a rage again. Can he just stop? The boy thought. Ever since his mother died, his father would surround himself in alcohol, getting into drunken fights at bars, finding their family in debt, and a large variety of things that any normal person would be ashamed of. But his father wasn’t normal. He was depressed and in a slump, and the boy could see that, but he could not do anything other than accept that this was his reality. The boy stirred in his balled up position. He opened his eyes. Had he been asleep? He thought. Deciding on that explanation for his drowsiness, he moved from his position and shuffled his feet towards the bathroom. He found that his day had a lack of productivity, but he was used to it he guessed. These days he would simply go to school in the morning, come home in the evening, and if his father was awake, subject himself as a tool, a tool his father relieves his frustrations upon and uses to do his work and responsibilities, such as organising money, cooking, cleaning…..all of these things……yet the boy never said a word. After all, all he could do was accept that this was his reality. The reflection that presented itself when the boy viewed the mirror, was one of exhaustion and hopeless desperation to escape his reality, yet the boy only ever knew his current life. He raised his left hand and lightly stroked over the area surrounding his left eye, the image of boiling water and excruciating pain felt after it made contact with his skin, still apparent and locked in his memory.  The boy did not know his mother well now that he thought about it. She died when he was at a young age, but he remembered her soft light hair and tired grey eyes. Even though she appeared cold, she was very warm he remembered, and the boy missed her, he missed her so much. Closing his eyes, the boy could feel the warm, wet tears running down his face. I don’t understand this he thought, as he grasped at his shirt to bear the painful memories that resurfaced his mind. Yet, the boy did not understand his sadness.  After several passing minutes, there was an apparent silence in the house. The boy walked out of the bathroom, quietly as though he was an animal stalking its prey, and entered the living room, the area in which his father occupied. Looking around, the boy found his father’s dormant body laying on the sofa. He had a strong scent of alcohol tainting the room, and his loud snores soon contrasted the short silence. This is my chance the boy soon realised. Careful not to make a sound on his way out, he swiftly passed through the front door, closed it, and left the house.  The bright sun was very characteristic to the warm Sunday afternoon, and its sunlight vibrantly reflected off the boy’s red hair as he made his way down to the shoreline. The weak strength of the small tumbling waves brushed against his ankles as he place his feet into the sand. He closed his eyes and let his thoughts and feelings melt into his mind as he raised his head up to the sky. Ice……..all he could feel was ice, he realised. He felt trapped as though he was frozen, unable to move, unable to scream, unable to escape. All this as the cold slowly crept up and froze his heart, becoming a victim to an inability to feel the emotions of others and forever be trapped in his father’s image. All his life he had accepted this feeling, never feeling the desire to leave it behind. At least that is what he thought, since all he could do was accept that this was his re-  “Why are you crying?” His thoughts suddenly stopped as he shot open his eyes. It was as though his emotions were shattered into pieces and blown away by the wind’s breeze. A shock so great that it appeared out of nowhere. He turned his head and looked to his right. There was a boy. “I…” He was speechless, he didn’t know what to say. The boy next to him shuffled closer and looked up at him with curiosity. That boy was like a fire he thought, so bright and warm with his volumed curly hair and face dusted with freckles…..he was almost the embodiment of sunshine.  “I think I’ve seen you at school before. You seem to spend a lot of time by yourself, don’t you?” It was true, the boy thought. Throughout his life he had never been allowed to have friends and would always isolate himself, not because he wanted to, but because the time he spent with his father simply led him to a lack of understanding on how to react to others. “Are you okay? You’re standing here all alone”. The boy talked to him again. How strange, he thought. “I…..don’t know.” he replied with. He wasn’t sure if it was concern, but there was something about the other boy’s expression that made him feel a bit…..touched? The idea made his heart flutter. “Well….how about we go for a walk? There’s this cool rock pool up ahead! Only if you want to though….” The other boy seemed a bit timid, clenching the hem of shirt. The one standing in the ocean only nodded in response. At this the unfamiliar face smiled up at him. This new person was making him feel weird. He didn’t know why but he wanted to follow that dark curly hair, follow him anywhere…...he thought. The freckled boy suddenly stopped and turned to him. “Here, you still have tears on your face”. The boy reached up his hands to his face and lightly brushed his skin wiping his tears away. By this one action, this point of contact, a flaming fire broke through the boy’s ice. For the first time since his mother, he has felt warmth. 

The boys spent the rest of the afternoon walking along the beach. They became friends, the boy’s first friend......and they promised to meet again.  Throughout the next few weekends, the boy would sneak out of the house and meet his friend at the beach. His friend seemed to be quite talkative, fluently connecting words together, but the boy didn’t mind. If he could, he would walk with that freckled boy and listen to him talk forever. Whenever they were together, this fluttering feeling he had, there was no other word to describe it as anything other than happiness. One day after returning from the beach, the boy opened his bedroom door to find his father standing by the window. “Where have you been?” He asked. His eyes were dark and unstable. The boy remained quiet, he had no desire to share his secret meetings with his father. “Where have you been?” The father repeated, anger boiling and fuming in his voice. The boy looked away from his father. “No where.” he stated. “No…” the father started, “You’ve been going somewhere…I know because I sometimes wake up and you’re not there.” There was some sincerity in his voice, but all that disappeared with the appearance of his enraged expression. The father walked up to his son and grabbed his shirt. “You’re trying to leave me, aren’t you?! You’re trying to escape from me!” He was yelling, obviously drunk, but the boy was startled by him. “I don’t understand…..just look at that scar on your face. No one cares about you, so why??” The boy simply stood there. For some reason, he felt this fire being lit inside him. A strong burning desire to tell his father that he’s wrong……and the boy gave into it. “You’re wrong father…” the boy said. “Someone does care about me, but you wouldn’t understand.” The boy took his father’s arm and pushed it away, finally giving in to his longing to leave his father behind. “Good-bye….” he stated, bright flames dancing around his determination, melting away all the ice that had trapped him…..and finally drowning out his father with the pools of water left behind. He closed the door behind him and walked away from the unjust cage that was his old life. A new life starts now, he thought.  He found his friend at the beach and ran towards him, just to see those green eyes he loved so much. When he caught up he gently grabbed his friend’s hand, “Let’s go now” he said, as he felt his burning confidence, and they both left the beach together. .....The boy did not know where he was going, but he’d happily go anywhere, go beyond……as long as he was with that freckled boy….. The boy who broke through his ice. 

Ahhhh if you made it this far then thank you so much for reading!! 💕✨ I’m not gonna lie, I wrote this in about two hours on paper (procrastination is a real talent) and I did have to tweak it a little when typing it up.....but really I hope you liked it!! Please feel free to let me know what you think~^^ I’d appreciate feedback! Oh and please keep in mind this is an AU, so I only chose to depict Todoroki’s father this way for the emotional impact of the story. So please know this is not how I view Endeavor in the cannon story!  I still hate his guts in the cannon though, I’m a Todoroki stan so y’all can’t stop me lmao So anyway thanks again! :) Have a great day/night <3 *slithers back into the darkness of Tumblr for the next few months never to post again*

[talesofealdancynedom]

Scarlet in her fairy robes with her familiar Galahad. I love my side characters; they deserve to be useful, chill supports, and love interests <3

Tale 7: Rah Wintersleep and Brōcid (chapter 2. Study Group 2/5 ) part 2. Stories of Fey

none

The next day at breakfast, Rah said he wanted to pursue magic; And go to school with Amadeus. His mother and aunt were thrilled to hear him take an interest in their line of work. Rah then gave a pointed smile at Gemini. Gemini tried to give a glare to Amadeus, but his son was too busy devouring bacon like a rabid animal.

“Mom, can me and Amadeus go to the library to study? Maybe Scorpio and Scarlet will be there too!” Rah chirped. Their mothers were filled with fancy, that the boys were not only being adamant young wizards, but spending time with girls they approved of. Their mothers said yes before Gemini could object. He nearly spat out his coffee. He was outvoted. Six to one. His wife’s and son’s smiles always counted as an extra vote each.

“We’ll call over Scorpio and Scarlet to pick you up! You can try summoning familiars and maybe get lunch together!” Rah’s mother exclaimed. A deep shadow cast Rah and Amadeus’s faces. They want those girls tagging along to see Morgan. Rah felt dumb for even suggesting it as a cover up.

“Excellent idea!” Gemini added calmly. Now smiling widely reassured his boys wouldn’t be up to mischief.

Rah and Amadeus were greeted an hour later at the Rosethorn manor’s pearl gate. The bars where nacre roses, while the walls and building itself were black. Gemini dug up the fairy robes his brother was supposed to inherit, and gave them to Rah. A boy should be well dressed in magic armor for a magic double date. Amadeus was also asked to put on his. His new harness went through all his clothing like it was intangible; and thus, always visible. When Scarlet and Scorpio arrived, it seemed all four of them were adorned in enchanted uniforms. Scorpio and Scarlet’s parents must have had the same idea. Galahad, Scarlet’s dalmatian familiar, also had a fancy collar.

“What’s up?” Scarlet asked. Rah and Amadeus looked tense.

“We’re actually going to the tower, to see Morgan; Who is like the King Mage, because Amadeus think’s I’m a mage too.” Rah blurted.

“Yes. My inner fey senses, indicate Rah might explode. I’m concerned.” Amadeus said blankly.

“Thank goodness. I thought your mom was setting us up on a double date or something. I’m in.” Scorpio sighed.

Scorpio was in the house Knightheart; A monkey magic house form The South Central. Her robes were a lovely rich salmon silk, embellished in silver, with matching spear and hair clips for her dark red hair. They matched her eyes. She had healed from going dark a few months back, enraged by a boy whistled at her. Scarlet intervened, and also had magic overflow through her, resulting in said healing. Scorpio was not just a childhood friend, but in Amadeus’s paladin program and professional faux love-interest for Rah; He never looked twice at her. Unlike Amadeus, who stared into Scarlet the who bike ride to the tower.

“But what if I do want to date Scarlet?” He said approaching the gate. Enfeyment must have also meant loss of tact and foresight. Or maybe he was just a nervous fifteen-year-old boy who suffered from Freudian slips. Scarlet blushed from the discomfort of the announcement. She returned his affections, but wasn’t ready to say it. No time like the present.

“Cool. Let’s get ice-cream later.” She shrugged, tucking her black and indigo waves from her face. Her heterochromia was magenta-cyan now; enhanced by her golden complexation. As they arrived, Scarlet’s skirt got caught in the bike gears, nearly ripping the black and indigo glittering bodice, gloves, and boots. She could be described as a classy lady, that glittered like black diamonds of the night sky, falling into a ditch.

The gate is entrancing the first time anyone visited it. They could feel the Shadow Veil within, like a deep breath and whisper through the leaves. The warm hug of the sunlight spotting through the branches. The smell of rich herbs and moist earth. Indulging their senses, they made it slowly to the front of the central tower. Morgan was arguing with the trees. There were twin Teralith Trees standing over the main entrance, with pearly bark and crystal leaves. One had the voice of a young lady and the other a young man. Amadeus, accustomed to floral banter, intently listened.

“I asked nice! Now give me the peaches for the unicorns, Pam!” Morgan yelled at the female tree.

“Oh gosh, he wants my virgin princess peaches, twin brother!” Pam gasped sarcastically.

“How dare you. Muncle Morgan.” The boy tree responded chuckling

“Muncle?” Rah whispered to Amadeus.

 “Mage-uncle, purhaps? Because the Beast Kings see Morgan as a brother, and thus the fey perceive him as an uncle? Rah, their fey; It’s better not to ask.” Amadeus answered shrugged.

“Next he’ll climb you, before making you into a boat, Bea.” Pam nabbed.

“That’s only because my wood is so hard. So hard it has stood strong for many years. I would make a fine paddle for any man.” Bea laughed. Scorpio and Scarlet joined the laughter, leading Morgan to notice them. He turned as red as a firetruck.

“Watch out girls, he’s pining for peaches.” Bea teased.

“And my brother’s hard wood apparently.” his sister chuckled.

“So hard. So strong.” Bea added in a fake deep sensual voice.

“Oh, this is Pam and Bea; Teralith Trees. The tree kingdom’s children, though generous, are also complete jerks and perverts; Their older siblings more so, apparently. Maybe being half-human like all royal fey, means they know malice. No one talks about magical plants being sentient often enough.” Morgan started.

“My tax-bracket says otherwise.” Amadeus laughed. “Wait, you’ve told me of these two. They have a bid to see who can be rooted the longest without turning human. Right? Caught a brief exchange one night when I visited. I guess this means you two prefer to watch!” He prompted. Pam’s laughter bubbled, as her leaves ruffled. Amadeus’s joke was so unfunny, she fell into human form. No longer a pale birch with sparkling golden glass leaves, but curvy woman with a golden crown of flowers on her messy weaved hair. She was barely able to catch her breath rolling on the dirt.

“You mages can have all my soft, fuzzy, pink peaches now; To think my little siblings at Rosethorn Manor said Amadeus was funny.”

“I win the bet!” Bea yelled skipping up into a boy. He was thin and white head to toes, with a flower crown like his twin. Bea was cheering in glee at his sister’s misfortune. They admittedly had forgotten what they had bet for.

“Well, I guess that confirms Rah’s a mage.” Morgan smiled. Scorpio then paused while the crew was chortling with the trees; who had started to wrestle in their human forms.

“Wait, Pam said ‘You mages.’ Like me and Scarlet too? Does this place just attract mage!?!?” Scorpio yelled.

This changed everything. Feeling rebellious against a controlling home lives, Scorpio, Scarlet, Amadeus, and Rah, took to Morgan and the fey with much joy. Sentient trees? Say no more. Soon they met afterschool, to study magery with Morgan; His girlfriend Emilia and cousin Regina even joined. Reggie, was also newly embracing magic. She wanted to be a warlock, and make flaming swords. Scorpio was now conflicted on weather she should wield blades or make them. Morgan had that effect. He would answer a small question about the mystical, with an enchanting encyclopedic answer. His adoration of magic and dorky mannerisms made it all so contagious.

Scorpio now spent hours in shop class with Reggie. Scarlet, one the other hand, was learning new healing magic from Morgan’s translated mage journals. What she was getting in school was good, but the fact she might be able to access even better medicinal spells, meant she could be and even better heartman. However, Rah had decided he wanted to be a charmer: A mage that castes spells with song and dance. He wanted to keep singing and healing Rosethorn gardens.

As the month went, Morgan began to notice every time Rah was on the gate. He was bonded to the tower, and felt it’s inhabitants. Morgan too, could feel the pressure of ether inside Rah; like a whirling fog in his head. It even clouded his perception of what fey lived on the gate. Morgan and Amadeus began sharing worried glances when around Rah. They wanted to act quickly, but had trouble finding any answers in Morgan’s restored records. The rest of the group, including Rah, remained happily ignorant of the fact he was a volcano about to erupt. Spending all their time in an illegal study group, turned out to be an excellent way for these teens to procrastinate telling loved ones they contain wondrous napalm.

NEXT--->

<---PREVIOUS

[valkerymillenia]

I ask all 50!!! Fill us with fun facts about you!

Holy shit, again?! I’m not that interesting, you know?But ok, I’ll try, I’ve already answered some though.

1: What color are your socks?

Answered.

2: Have you ever lied about your age? Why?

Answered already!

3: What is something you regret in the past month?

So much wasted time…

4: Do you believe in love at first sight?

I’ve answered this before- no, I believe in attraction at first sight; love, however, needs to be earned, grown and nourished.

5: When was the last time you wrote someone a letter on paper?

Do notes to translate conversations into paper for my deaf dad count? If so, then today.If you mean real letters… I honestly don’t remember.

6: How old were you when you first learned how to ride a bike? Who taught you?

Answered!

7: Do you get along with your parents? Why or why not?

Oh my gods, this is such a loaded question…Ok, I’ll try to keep it simple. Who am I kidding? That’s not possible.

Mom- ok so my mom is denial of any form of mental illness but she clearly has manic depression and war PTSD since forever. So as a result my mom has always been a bit aloof, irresponsible, neglectful, super permissive, a sneaky opportunist and a slightly childish and impulsive. Never thinks ahead, just goes nuts on the moment or spends too much time asleep (no in between).So my mom wasn’t the best mother in the world, she was a great caregiving and spoiling mother when we were babies but as soon as we gained minimal independence (aka around 5 years old) she just slacked off on the motherhood department. She’s not very bad, she’s just irresponsible and opportunistic and won’t interfere if we need help which doesn’t suit a mother but she’s a great person so she makes a very good friend (as long as you set boundaries and basic duties), she’s funny and sweet and a bit geeky, she’s also beautiful and used to be a model before I was born so she’s that fashion and beauty oriented friend (if fact she’s a certified beautician and taught me all she knows).So… Complicated relationship, lots of love but not the best mom (can’t blame her, grandma was a bitch).

Dad- I love him, he raised me, but I was also his main caregiver since I was 10 since he’s deaf and crippled. He’s a funny and permissive dad (except when he had explosive bouts of rage but that was a phase…a traumatic and slightly violent phase around the divorce time but short), he tried to be a provider and friend with shared interests with me. BUT he was also quite neglectful, being deaf made him very introverted, paranoid and isolated so he just let me run wild (I didn’t, I was taking care of the house and school instead) while he was cooped up playing pc games. We have that friendly daddy’s girl relationship but we both lack trust, we keep our more important thoughts to ourselves and I’m always afraid that as a deaf person he’ll misunderstand important things or judge me for whatever (and he’s always also feeling judged) so our relationship often feels shallow, he’s also the type in denial about people’s mental illness.

Biological father- Fucking complicated. As a little child he babysat me and was our neighbor so I was always hanging out and getting candy, he was also the person that cherished me the most to take hundreds of photos of me. I moved at age 5 so after that we only communicated through my grandma when she traveled between countries, he’d send me presents and worry about me. I only found out he was my progenitor when I was 10 and it took me years to accept it. Saw him again when I was 18, in fact it was like shock therapy- I spent a whole month living with him as I visited my hometown again. He likes to spoil me as much as he can and he’s very kind but also naive and stubborn and not the type that likes to talk about feelings or important things so talks between us are extremely awkward chitchat.

Stepdad- Terrible relationship. He’s the kind of person that is a caregiver for us all out of duty but then uses that to emotionally manipulate everyone. He’s small minded, old fashioned and selfish and blames everyone for his problems, he also seems to have a personal thing against me- pretty sure he doesn’t hate me but I’m his natural verbal punching bag, anything I say or do in front of him, no matter how innocent, even standing still for a moment or asking to pass the juice at dinner, he twists everything into insults and psychological abuse. Luckily my sister is his baby so she escapes his judgement but he wasn’t that much of a present parent to her either and let her run wild a lot (I’m so glad I could turn that around and teach her to be way more responsible than her parents). The only reason I don’t totally hate him is because he gave me sister, who I love most in the world.

8: What’s your favorite season?

Answered!

9: Do you currently like someone?

Yup, also answered before.

10: Have you ever used an Ouija board?

I know how but I never used it, as a Wiccan my preferred specialty for spiritual communing was pendulum scrying.

11: What’s the last song you sang?

“Havanna” by Camilla Cabello has been stuck in my head for weeks.

12: What’s your favorite scent?

Telling me to choose just one fav of anything is hard af… But here are some favs.

Fresh peppermint, lavender, petrichor, burnt eucalyptus, baby powder, sea water, freshly baked bread, and oddly enough- gasoline.

13: What’s your favorite urban legend?

Can’t choose favs but off the top of my head… La Llorona.

14: What’s a bad habit that you have?

Procrastinating.

15: What’s a strange habit that you have?

All my odd stims and ocd rituals.

16: What’s the first instrument that you learned to play?

Answered.

17: How would you describe your ‘type?’

Already answered in the previous ask meme.

18: Would you rather stay in or go out?

Both, when I go out I make it special and try to make the most of it because it’s rare… But I guess I do prefer the safety and routine of staying home.

19: What was the last thing you said to your mom?

“Never going to see what you borrowed from dad again, am I? This is why people don’t trust you, you never keep your promises…

Well, whatever! How are the stitches? You’re better, right?

Ok, put my sister on. Kisses, bye.”

20: Do you want to get married someday?

Already answered in the previous asked meme.

21: Have you ever snuck out?

Not that I needed to with my kind of parents but yeah, a couple of times.

22: Can you sing well?

I love to sing but whether I’m good or not is up to the listener, I can post a song sample if anyone wants.

23: What’s an embarrassing thing that happened this week?

Other than grovelling desperatly for help?

24: When was the last time you went sledding?

Never?

25: Have you ever/do you liked someone you know you can never be with?

Yeah.

26: Do people often mispronounce your name?

Yes! If you’re not a Portuguese speaker, I DARE you to pronounce my surname. Go ahead- Coelho.

27: Would you like to live in another country?

I do miss my home country, South Africa holds my heart… and I’ve dreamed of a stint in Japan. But all in all, I like this country, it’s…interesting, safe.

28: Do you like to watch ghost-hunting shows?

Not really, they tend to be too over the top and stereotypical. 

29: Who was the last person you said you loved to?

Boyfriend.

30: What’s something you’d like to be better at?

Follow through.

31: Have you ever stayed up to talk to someone who was sad?

Very often, Some right here on tumblr.

32: What was the last thing you cooked?

Chili con carne. Been eating leftovers of it for a whole week now.

33: Do you think you would make a good parent?

Answered already.

34: Do you have trouble sleeping at night?

Answered!

35: Where is your best friend right now?

Given the day and time, my sister is probably at dance practice now.

36: How long does it take you to get ready in the morning?

Depends if I’m making an effort (an hour) or if I’m just being casual (20min).

37: How late do you usually stay up at night?

Answered.

38: When was the last time you cried and why?

I don’t know… 

39: Have you ever won a contest?

Yes, started this year by winning a Justice League pop contest. But that was more of a giveaway... Actual contest? I won a couple b of art contests before but nothing big.

40: Can you draw well?

I have art posted here so you tell me.

41: Would you ever date someone you met on Tumblr/the internet?

Sure. I already do.

42: What was the last thing you ate?

….Bread.

43: Do you think you’re/you’d make a good boyfriend/girlfriend?

I sure hope so, I try my best… But to be honest I don’t think I’m a very good partner.

44: Have you ever had a near-death experience?

About 6 actually.

45: What do you think people think of you?

I don’t know… I’ve been told I make people feel comfortable and I’m easy to open up to? But to be honest I don’t really know.

46: What is your middle name and do you like it?

Augusto. My mom’s maiden name, because that’s how it works here (Name+ maybe 2nd name + mom’s surname + dad’s surname). 

Yes, I like it, it’s latin. But people sometimes mix it up with my paternal grandma’s first name.

47: Are you close with either of your parents?

In my own way, yes. Both mom and dad.

48: Do you like yourself?

Some days…

49: State five facts about your appearance –

-I get a lot of comments on my boobs and I really don’t mind

-I look pale because I stay inside a lot but I tan very easily, probably because my mom is dark

-I love my tattoos, I’m proud of them

-I wear glasses or contacts in important occasions 

-I have the worst time looking people in the eye

50: State five facts about your personality –

-I’m patient but full of anxiety

-I don’t have just one personality

-I try to be as unbiased and non-judgmental as possible

-I’m obsessive about random things

-I like solitude but I also like interacting (though the more non-physical the better)

[storywars-r]

4/13 - Once Upon A Time

Chapter 1 by R

A young person sits at their computer. It just so happens that today is the anniversary of the greatest adventure they've ever been on, and now, eight years after the fact, they sit down to type the story.

Your name is Alex, although this has not always been your name, nor will it always be your name, but it is your name for now, and back then it was your name as well.

The past eight years have been full of action and adventure and strange magics and alien worlds, yet it all began in a single room on a simple, April day. It feels so long ago, because it was so long ago, and to you it was the day that changed your life.

Now, where do you begin?

==> Describe Room

==> Get Straight In To That High Action

==> Reminisce About You And Your Friends (And Shenanigans)

Chapter 2 by Jess

==> Describe Room

You choose to describe the room you reside in.

The thin walls that surround you used to make you feel claustrophobic, now your claustrophobia lives in elevators and your grandmas kitchen.

Though the vertical flat surfaces are colored a different hue every month or so, (You like to change it up,) they rarely match your mood. I mean, it's not like there hasn't been a time where you weren't in a blue mood. Or a nice magenta.

You like to keep your room nice. Actually that's a lie, your father likes you to keep your room nice. Your father also likes 80's music. And with assorted posters and one of which is titled 'The police' hanging in his room, it borderlines on obsession.

Speaking of your dad, you see his car pull up now.

Oh god that's his car pulling up now.

What do you do??

==> Ignore your dad. Chat up some chums on whatever generic chat room you can get a hold of.

==> Frantically attempt to finish your chores, hoping to avoid your fathers blistering rage.

==> Jump out of your window and try to compensate for your laziness and utter failure as a son by sticking a wicked landing.

Chapter 3 by Adam Isawesome

==> Jump out of your window and try to compensate for your laziness and utter failure as a son by sticking a wicked landing.

You pull down your window and quickly glance around the room to make sure that your dad isn't looking, then you try to front flip out of the window.

Unfortunately, you slam into a bush full of sharp branches and probably ruin your hair for life.

Then, as you near the ground, you curl up and end up landing in a roll. You roll over and over for a couple feet before, suddenly, you hit a tree in your front yard and lie sprawling under it's branches.

Not exactly a graceful landing.

The worst part is, all the noise you made had attracted your dad's attention, something you really didn't want to happen. Your dad walks up to you and you expect him to shout at you, inquiring why you didn't do your chores. Instead his face is gripped with fear.

"Uh, what's wrong?" you ask hesitantly, hoping that your dad isn't scared of dirty dishes. That would be weird.

Your dad simply stares at you. "Haven't you heard the news?"

"Dad," you say blandly, "I live under a rock."

"Remember all those years ago? When you and your friends closed a portal that trapped those monsters in a different dimension?"

"No," you say while rolling your eyes. "I've forgotten."

Your dad stares at you blankly. He has really bad comprehension when it comes to sarcasm.

"I'm being sarcastic."

"Oh," says your dad, embarrassed. "Anyways, another portal has appeared, just like the one before. Only..."

"Only?" you inquire.

"It's not in a harmless field miles from civilization. It's in the middle of New York."

You hear yourself gasping. Thousands of people's lives are at risk.

What do you do???

==> Gather your friends together and go to see the portal.

==> Run into your room and curl up in the fetal position for the rest of your life.

==> Head straight for the portal without your friends.

Chapter 4 by Jay Ray

==> Run into your room and curl up in the fetal position for the rest of your life.

I mean who would blame you? You completely lucked out on the other portal and now this one's right in the middle of New York City? Can't some other more qualified person do it? Wheres the military in all this any way?

Cowering in your room is actually quite a good way to spend time before the apocalypse. Very enjoyable. You have your nice bed, your cat, your box of tissues for relentless crying. You were about to give up before you began and when all hope seemed lost, a song came on the radio.

It was a song from the 70's. Another old song. Whatever, at least it's not from the 80's. It was a weird song talking about a man who sold the world. The song seemed oddly relatable. You know there's nobody else in the world that knows how to close a portal. If you just up and didn't do anything you'd just be selling the world to monsters.

Maybe you can do this you think you yourself, becoming very pumped up. You just have to make a few calls. Time to assemble the old team.

Charlie - The Brains

Rose - Distraction Artist

Anthony - Weapons Expert

Jake - Comic Relief

All jokes aside, you need them. You couldn't have closed the first portal without them and you wont be able to close the new one without them either. Plus, Jake is the only one with a car.

Of course they all say yes. This is the first big adventure they've had since the original portal. That and the fact that the lives of countless people rests in a group of teenager's hands. But that's besides the point.

You've got everybody together. You're all piled into Jake's car when you get news that the path to New York has received flash floods and is dangerous to traverse. Anthony offers a solution.

You see, Anthony is weird kid; a sweet kid, but a weird one. He practices this thing called dark magic. He was the one that found out about the portal in the first place. He just needed our help to seal it. He said if we all get on our bikes he can create a spell that will let us fly our bikes à la E.T. style. You'd love to, but you're torn.

What do you do????

==> Ride across the sky using Anthony's witchcraft.

==> Have epic flooded country side adventures in Jake's Honda Civic.

The answer is quite obvious ; )

Chapter 5 by ArtemisNine

==> Have epic flooded country side adventures in Jake's Honda Civic.

As if there was ever a choice.

You pile into the car, the five of you, young adventurers all. Jake drives, of course.

Charlie is your mapman, as well as being the man with a travel plan. You would quite literally be lost without him.

Anthony is in charge of your arsenal. By arsenal, you mean the large stack of guns, grenades, bullets, and knives stacked in the very back of the car. You aren't exactly- wait. Is that a rocket launcher?

Best to leave Anthony to Anthony, you reason.

Naturally, Rose is in charge of making sure you don't all go crazy on this multi-state multi-day road trip. She has a backpack full of books, games, and some device that gives you all great wi-fi. Plus, she brought all the chargers.

And you?

Well, your in charge of snacks.

What did you bring?

==> The most poppin snacks a young human such as yourself can get their hands on, of course!

==> Whatever was in your cabinet at the time. You're on a time limit, don't expect miracles.

==> Nothing. You forgot, you moron.

Chapter 6 by Armadillo

==> Nothing. You forgot, you moron.

In all the excitement, you forgot to bring snacks. Jake sighs loudly.

Anthony levels the rocket launcher at you. Charlie begins looking for convenience stores by the roadside.

Everyone agrees with Charlie's idea. They begin scanning the nearby countryside for shops or gas stations. You begin to feel a little better about yourself. What are friends for, after all?

It is Rose who provides the practical statement and bursts your bubble. "New York is flooded, guys."

You freeze. Anthony pulls out the rocket launcher again.

Your mind races. The snacks are the most important part, especially because who knows how long you'll be out there fighting monsters and closing portals. What could you do?

==> Surrender to Anthony and have Jake turn the Civic around, drive five hours back the way you came, and get the snacks.

==> Procrastinate and tell your friends, "It's NYC, guys, someone's gonna be open even during a flood.

==> Tell them they can munch on the monsters they kill and "HURRY UP JAKE"

Chapter 7 by Armadillo

==> Procrastinate and tell your friends, "It's NYC, guys, someone's gonna be open even during a flood."

Jake smirks. "Actually, you're probably right."

Rose sighs and leans over Charlie's shoulder to look at the map. "We should be there in a few more hours if we take this route." She traces her finger along the map.

"Without traffic and obstacles factored in," Charlie adds.

Jake chooses that moment to respond. "I guess the 'few hours' thing is out, then. This is one hell of an obstacle."

You lean in front to catch a glimpse of what Jake is talking about. What you see in front of you is so big, you have to rub your eyes a few times before you realize it's not a hallucination.

==> Have Anthony take the lead and defeat the 'obstacle' with his weapons and dark magic, and the rest of the team as back up.

==> Try to avoid the obstacle, even though that might take longer than vanquishing it.

==> Screw the world and go back home. It's not worth it.

Chapter 8 by Shasta

==> Screw the world and go back home. It's not worth it.

It wasn't worth it the first time, either. Rose almost died before you got to tell her you loved her and when you all realized you'd be okay, your unyielding love still remained a secret.

Besides, there had to be more qualified personnel on the portal by know? Hadn't the people in the last portal tell you never to go looking for another one again?

You sigh, slumping in your seat. You didn't know. You had tried to supress all memories of the portal, the last one. This one. . . you didn't know.

You voiced your opinions, getting shot down by Anthony.

"I really want to blow something up," was all he said, and Charlie kept driving. No one was going to argue with the dude with all the fire powers. Smart choice, really, but you wanted to go home.

You felt that if you were going to die, you wanted to be surrounded by those you love.

==> Kiss Rose and finally tell her how much you love her.

==> Point out that you're being followed from the air by a suspicious looking airborne object.

==> Take a nap. Try and talk to your contacts from the first portal. See if they have the info or if they've forgotten you as well.

Chapter 9 by Saluex-ander

==> Kiss Rose and finally tell her how much you love her.

You feel the overwhelming urge to kiss Rose, your best friend, your greatest ally, the person you've had a crush on for years. In order to subdue this urge, you bang your head into the window multiple times. That was a terrible idea! She'd never forgive you! Besides, she's into girls, and you're... a hot mess. Yes. That is your gender. Your gender is 'hot mess.'

At least you're hot.

The car keeps heading straight for the portal, even as the water gets higher and the wheels stop turning. Rain drifts upwards. Buildings dance with the wind and you're upside down but gravity's holding you. Physics gets weird from here, kids.

The portal is getting closer, and so is your destiny (again). What do you do?

==> Cry. You are feeling lots of things, and none of them are good!

==> Accept your destiny. Enter the Portal.

==> Flee. You didn't sign up for this!

Chapter 10 by Adam Isawesome

==> Cry. You are feeling lots of things, and none of them are good!

"I thought we were going back home!" says Charlie.

"That's what I thought too..." says Anthony.

"Just shut, Anthony, and shoot something with a bazooka; no one cares about your opinion anyway," Jake snarls.

Everyone goes silent.

"Sorry," Jake says, sighing. "I'm just stressed. I mean, I still don't even technically have a driver's license and this is much more difficult than driving slowly in a parking lot in the middle of the night."

You could see how driving through the road while water flowed almost up to the windshield and random bits of debris floated upwards into the air would be much more difficult than driving slowly in a parking lot in the middle of the night.

At that moment that everyone notices your sobbing. It had started out quiet, but now it was unignorably loud.

"Uh, Alex, are you good?" Jake was looking backward at me.

"Keep your eyes on the road!" screams Charlie, who was sitting next to Jake. You look up and see tumbling rocks and trees and large plastic hamburgers meant to sit on top of fast food restaurants rocketing towards your group.

"Right, okay!" Jake swerves the car to the right and off the road.

"LEFT!" shouts Charlie. The car swerves left and back onto the road.

As Charlie and Jake desperately dodge rocks and hamburgers in the front of the car (there is an unusually large amount of fast food restaurants in New Jersey and NYC), Rose puts her arm around you. "Hey, it's okay Alex. You stopped the portal last time you can do it again." At least something good has come out of the day.

"Thanks," you say. Your crying stops. "It's just, with everything happening today."

"Nothing you can't handle," says Rose, smiling. You smile back.

"I feel like a third wheel," says Anthony, who's also sitting in the back.

"Uh, Anthony?" comes Jake's call from the front of the car.

"Yeah?"

"The obstacle's back. We might need your witchcraft or grenades." Then Jake thinks for a second, and adds, "Where does a kid your age get grenades anyway?"

What do you do???

==> Have Anthony fight and (hopefully) defeat the obstacle.

==> Have someone distract the obstacle while everyone else sneaks past, and, by someone, you mean yourself because no one else is as stupid as you are.

Chapter 11 by Tricia L - Got to go, goodbye...

==> Have Anthony fight and (hopefully) defeat the obstacle.

Immediately, a smile so horrifying you will never forget it spreads on his face and his eyes turn an eerie red. This makes you cry again, but no one notices because they are staring, equally terrified. A foul smell comes from the bottom of the car, and you look down at your pants.

At least they're dry.

"Sure, I'll go defeat the evil monster in front of us." He hops out of the car and snaps his fingers. The monster keels over, dead.

Now your pants are wet.

He hops back into the car, and you proceed to the portal.

It's a lot bigger than you remembered the other one being. The water that is flooding New York comes from the portal, and droves of creatures are marching out. Everyone is shocked, including Anthony. Actually, he seems a bit more than shocked.

His tiny child body is shivering. At first, you thought it was shock, but then he fell to his knees, grabbing and shaking his head, half muttering, "No... this can't be happening. No no no no no! I don't see it! I don't see them! They aren't there. That's not them. Nope. But it is!"

You didn't know much about him except that he had found the portal for you, but he seemed to know of this creature army that was coming out of the portal.

"Anthony, what's wrong?" You ask, grabbing his hands in yours to get his attention.

He starts to cry. "They invaded my world when I was young, but I escaped. They just keep coming, following me as I try to escape! I thought that the cycle had ended when we closed the portal so long ago, but they're back! How can they be back?"

A huge, heavily accented English voice booms out, coming from one of the creatures- it looked to be the leader. "Where are the humans Charlie, Rose, Jake, and Alex?"

There is some sort of huge army that looks to be pretty threatening, and they apparently tried to take over here before. Plus, they're looking for you.

What do you do?

==> Make a full blown frontal assault, knowing everyone will probably die.

==> Get some intelligence from Anthony on these creatures.

==>Kill yourselves now; the end they have planned is surely going to be more painful.

Chapter 12 by Adam Isawesome

==>Kill yourselves now; the end they have planned is surely going to be more painful.

Rose wades through the water that is now up to her waste. She looks at you, fear in her eyes. "Alex, what will we do?"

"Give up! What else?" You whip out your ceremonial knife for hara-kiri that you had specifically ready in your pocket.

"What's that?" asks Anthony, still whimpering.

"It's a ceremonial knife for hara-kiri that I had specifically ready in my pocket."

"Ah," says Charlie, "Much more honorable than jumping off a cliff."

"I'll have one, please," whimpers Anthony, reaching feebly up.

"Alright, that's enough!" declares Rose, standing up. "If all of you are going to curl up and die, then so be it, but I, for one, am going to go out and do something about it!"

Rose stands up dramatically, her long hair flowing majestically in the wind. You stare at her majestic-ness love struck. You have another inexplicable urge to kiss her.

"I have another inexplicable urge to kiss you," you say.

"Ew! You're the wimp that just gave up and tried to commit suicide! I can't believe you!" Rose slowly deflates. "You know, Alex, when we were saving the world all those years ago, I was madly in love with you! The way you lead the team with strength and discipline inspired me to be a better person. But you never noticed me, all you cared about was saving the world! Now you don't even care about saving the world! You just want to die a dignified death via Harry and Carrie or whatever you said. How far you've fallen, you coward. I'm sorry, I can't love someone who backs away from a fight like you!"

"I feel like a third wheel," says Jake.

"Does that make me a fourth wheel?" replied Charlie.

Anthony whimpered something quietly and shook back and forth.

"Wow," you say. "Wow, Rose, I don't know what to say. I loved you too, but I was always just too scared... Too scared to ever tell you my feelings. You're right, I am a coward."

Rose huffs and turns her head away, chin up. "Go ahead and commit seppuku, like I care." A tear slides down her cheek.

"Look out!" you scream. One of the creatures, a gray-skinned, faceless humanoid monsters, had snuck up on the group. It slashed at Rose with its three claws. You dive forwards with your hara-kiri knife and stab into the chest of the creature, who screeches an unearthly screech and dissolves into dust in a truly Thanos-snap-esque style.

Rose stares in awe at you stare in disbelief at the knife in your hands.

"Wow!" says Rose in a truly feminine voice. "I always believed in you! You're so strong and brave!"

She flings herself upon you and gives you the kiss you'd been waiting for your whole life.

"I'm just going to go do things over here," says Jake, and Charlie and Anthony follow suit.

Rose continues to kiss you, and you feel like more of a hot mess than ever before.

Rose suddenly pulls away. "Did you brush your teeth today?"

"We were racing through the countryside trying to save the world," you respond. Rose shrugs and starts kissing you again.

"AHHHH!" You hear the uncanny screeches of Jake.

"But I still needed to develop a quantum equation that defined the limitations of sub-atomic light speed!" screeched Charlie.

==> Go help Jake, Charlie, and Anthony

==> Continue kissing Rose

Chapter 13 by Tricia L - Got to go, goodbye...

==> Go help Jake, Charlie, and Anthony

You hesitate for a second before pulling away. What? Of course you never even thought of abandoning your friends to the creatures. The two of you rush to your friends' aid, you slashing with the hara-kiri knife and Rose rescuing the others.

"Ah! Glad you stopped your kissing session and decided to start helping," Charlie said. He turned to Anthony. "You were saying you know these things? Also, why didn't they say your name with the rest of ours earlier?"

"I do know them," Anthony conceded. "They used to be my friends."

"Are you not a human being?" Charlie asked.

You're getting awfully bored of this detailed information. At first, you were thinking you should listen in, but then you realized: That's why Charlie's here! He's the brains, after all. I don't need to know this stuff... I think.

What do you do?

==> Listen to Charlie's questioning of Anthony to finally get information on all of this.

==> Do the chicken dance, not listening to the information.

==> Nothing. Why should you have to do everything?

Chapter 14 by Tricia L - Got to go, goodbye...

==> Do the chicken dance, not listening to the information.

With a perfectly reasonable, rational mind, you cautiously begin to raise your arms in front of where your shoulders are, then open and close your hands as if they were beaks. No one seems to notice- they are too focused on interrogating Anthony.

You wonder if you're doing it right. You haven't done the chicken dance in forever and you're pulling the steps from the deep (some would argue shallow) recesses of your mind.

Next, you tuck your hands beneath their respective armpits and waggle both, emulating wings. This too is done in hesitant, slow motions, and no one notices.

They only notice when you're rapidly wiggling your butt back and forth for the last part of the dance.

"Alex! What are you doing?! Pay attention, you idiot!"

You proceed to listen to a brief recap of Anthony's past. Apparently, he's an alien that was pursued by other aliens through many worlds, all of which were destroyed until he came to Earth. That was the first portal, and they stopped it before it escalated. The Earth people had been underestimated.

This time, the full forces were rallied to attack, and the only way to close the portal would be to smear it with Anthony's blood because his power was apparently partially stolen to open the portals.

More on Anthony's species: they generally led peaceful lives despite their incredible powers, so they did not fight back as they were slaughtered by their antagonists. Anthony escaped but they wanted to kill and harvest all of his species, as their power is greater the less of them there are. He knew he couldn't fight on his own, so he ran for his life. Now they've cornered him on the final world that still has life other than their own.

They want to raze it to the ground.

You interrupt Charlie's excited ramblings. "So they want us so that they can draw you in? They want us as hostages?"

Anthony and Charlie nodded. Jake just shrugged, his version of yes.

"I'm proud of you, Alex, "Rose said. "You have an ounce of intelligence in you."

"So, what do you guys think? What should our strategy be?" you ask, looking for suggestions.

"Well," Jake started, "We can't just sacrifice Anthony... maybe we could do a blood sample or something? Then we cut off the rest in their world."

"How about you, Charlie?"

Charlie was deep in thought, but he looked up at the mention of his name. "What if we just gave them a fake Anthony filled with some of his blood? Presumably they want to kill him so they'll stab him or something and the blood can spread on the portal, closing it."

Anthony looks mildly perturbed at the continued mentions of his blood, but he raises his hand.

"Yeah?" you ask.

His eyes turn red. "I say we don't bother closing the portal. If none are left to use it, there's no crisis."

You pause for a second. "So you're saying..."

"Revenge."

"Um..."

You're fresh out of ideas, so you turn to Rose. "Do you have any clue?" I ask, hoping everyone will forget Anthony's idea.

"Get help, catch all of the minor troops one by one, or unit by unit until all that is left is the undefended king. Shove them all back through and close the portal."

"So you're thinking a long-term thing?" you reply.

"If that's how long it takes," she replies.

"Weeeeelp."

You're at a loss for words.

But what if...

==>Jake's plan

==>Charlie's plan

==>Anthony's plan

==>Rose's plan

==>You...???

[purplesurveys]

874

What's something you couldn't live without, other than the obvious? It’d be very hard to have to get by without my glasses. I’d technically survive, but I’ll have to get used to bumping into things a lot and never recognizing anyone unless they’re right beside/in front of me. What's something that will always cheer you up? Dogs. Real life dogs, photos of dogs, videos of dogs, stories about dogs, etc. Who's had the biggest positive impact on your life? My orgmates. They made me happy when I needed it the most, called me out when I needed the help, and idk I’m just happy whenever I get to see them. I can’t recall a time where I felt like it was a chore to spend some time with them. Do you wear flip-flops during the winter? Sigh...moving on... What was the last thing you said out loud? I asked Nina to help me bring Cooper and his stuff up to my parents’ room; specifically, I asked her to bring his food and water bowls.

What's something that irritates you to no end? Backhand compliments. An uncle once congratulated me for getting into my dream school but ended his sentence with “are you sure you don’t wanna go to [2nd top university in the country, (which I also passed the day before)]? You’ll fit better there.” This was like two days after I found out I got into UP, so I was still on cloud nine. I don’t know how my face contorted after that but I wasn’t pleased.

Honestly, do looks matter to you? Yes, but not as much as personality and intelligence. When was the last time you had a girls/guys night out? Not sure. I just have nights out in general; I never plan out gender-exclusive hangouts with my friends. Do you still watch kiddie movies/tv shows? Sometimes, when I get in the mood to. It’s not something I feel the need to do regularly. What's your worst habit? Never learning my lesson and being careless just because everything is going well. Best way I can illustrate this is when a couple of a months ago I started getting regular headaches because I’d sleep at 3, 4 AM – I addressed it by giving myself an earlier bedtime. When the headaches went away and I started feeling better, I went right back to sleeping late lol. Procrastinating is a good example too; I’ve submitted work early occasionally and it’s satisfying as fuck, but I never learn for the most part and stick to doing stuff at the last minute. Do your parents call you by any embarrassing nicknames? No. Byn is a nickname, but I don’t find it embarrassing. Do you have road rage? Yeah but there have to be certain conditions for me to get to that point, like once I’ve seen enough stupidity on the road and I can’t take it anymore; when I’m tense about something; or when traffic has been standstill for too long. Is there a certain word that you always forget how to spell? Not really. I know my spelling pretty well. Are there any books in your room? Which ones? Yesssss but it’s mostly because I owned a lot of books as a kid and I’ve thrown none of them out. My book collection is sorely not updated because I stopped reading as I got older. Do you take too many surveys? I wouldn’t say I take too many, especially considering the fact that I used to take like 7-10 surveys everyday back in high school. I do take them regularly. Write some lyrics from the song you're currently listening to: "You know I’m always coming back to this place, you know I’m always gonna look for your face.”

When it comes to dating, what's your preferred age range? 0-1 year. When was the last time someone gave you a weird look? Continued the next morning, lol. I was dancing in my seat over dinner last night because the fried chicken we had was super good, so my mom looked at me strangely. Do you like to cuddle? Only with a significant other, and an animal if they’re willing to cuddle. Do you like the band Cartel? I don’t think I’ve heard of that band yet. Do you play any instruments? No, but I’m always wishing I could. Do you ever blare the music in the car and dance like an idiot? I used to do that when I drove to and from school. It’s the only time in the day where I’m not working and I’m alone, so I allow myself to let loose. Though I gotta say, most of it is recorded because I always have a dashcam on HAHAHAHA so I definitely have some footage I don’t want getting aired in like my funeral or something. Do you like playing in the rain? When I was a kid.

What's something you miss? Going to the mall is a big one. Anything unpleasant coming up soon? The worst thing I can think of is the first anniversary of Nacho’s passing. It’s not till September, but when I think about how March literally feels like yesterday September doesn’t seem too far away anymore. If you had a pet moose, what would you name him? Probably the name of another animal, like Cow. I’ve seen other people name their dogs the names of different animals and it has always sounded so hilarious to me. Do you often hold back what you really want to say? If it’s gonna make me look unnecessarily blunt and hurtful then yes. Are you currently wearing any jewlery? Nope. What was the last gift you gave to someone? Cooper, for Father’s Day. It was my mom’s idea but I helped chip in with the graduation money I got from one of my aunts. Do you decorate for Christmas? (If you celebrate it, that is.) We do. I’ll probably put a tree and some stockings up once I live alone, idk, just so I don’t feel too lonely. Are you hungry? A bit, but it’s manageable. On that note, I miss continental breakfasts. I’ve been having Filipino-style breakfast for months and I really would just like a goddamn croissant or bread rolls with butter for once, lol. When was the last time you went bowling? Sometime in September and October last year. Can you whistle? Yes. Is there a certain genre of music that you just can't stand? Country. Are you allergic to anything? Nope. How many pillows do you sleep with? Two. I lay my head on one and hug another. If I don’t have a ~hug pillow~ it takes much longer for me to fall asleep. You've just won a free vacation! Where do you want to go? Covid restrictions hypothetically put aside, I’d love to go on the New York/Texas trip I initially planned as my grad gift. Do you have a good relationship with your parents? I have a good relationship with my dad. But it’s not like I feel comfortable enough to tell either of my parents any of my secrets. What's your favorite thing about yourself? Gabie likes to tell me “you’re too selfless, you don’t have to help everyone” in sort of like an annoyed tone because that’s exactly what I do lol - help anyone, even if I have to go out of my way or even if it’ll inconvenience me to do it. But I love it about me. I like when I get to make people go home with one less issue on their shoulders. Do you have any health problems? Scoliosis. Have you ever had a near-death experience? Almost smashed into a car that suddenly braked while I was going 50, 60 kph. Are you extremely picky when it comes to guys/girls? That’s what demis essentially are, lol. Do you ever listen to classical music? It’s my last resort when I’m studying and no other music is helping me get focused. What was the last concert you attended? Paramore. What's a movie you'd like to see right now? (Old or new) Ammonite, it’s an upcoming film with Kate Winslet and Saoirse Ronan. Do you take life too seriously? Most of the time. I just find it necessary that way. When was the last time you were truly scared? This weekend when my mom watched a jumpscare with the sound on, so I heard the loud demon scream that came up in the end. What's the funniest trick you've ever pulled on anyone? I don’t like pulling tricks because I don’t like them pulled on me. The most I’ve done is take Gab’s phone and pretend with her that it’s lost. Do you like orange juice? I’ll drink it if it’s served for free, but I wouldn’t buy one for myself. Do you own any skinny jeans? Yes, nearly all my jeans are skinny. Do you have a diary/journal that you frequently write in? You’re looking at it. When was the last time you had a good workout? November, back when I still had that intense PE class that made me work out for an hour every Wednesday and Friday. Do you like your eye color? I find it too common but I’m not actively complaining about it. I don’t feel the need to change it. When was the last time you played with Play-Doh? Two or three years ago at a cousins’ place. One of them was still a baby then, so the toys they had around were clay and kinetic sand and stuff. What's something that you think people waste too much time on? Fighting on Facebook comments lol Do you think they should outlaw talking on your cell phone while driving? They already have, at least here. Are you embarrassed to burp or fart in front of your friends? For the most part. I’ll burp only in front of Angela and Gab. Do you like peanut butter cookies? Yesssssss, but I don’t get to have it a lot. :(