#A GORGEOUS HAZELNUT WHO DESERVES HAPPINESS

[starlity]

good luck gift for mon darling terushira ambassador @you-can-all-eat-shit; all the best wishes for you and your future, angel!! ♡ ♡

[maplecornia]

chapter 21

𝔴𝔬𝔯𝔡 𝔠𝔬𝔲𝔫𝔱: 3.72K

𝔤𝔢𝔫𝔯𝔢: romance | slice of life | fluff | angst | bts x female!reader | ot7

𝔰𝔲𝔪𝔪𝔞𝔯𝔶: You watched them from the sidelines ever since you were a young teenage girl. Now you’re grown up, they’ve returned after 2 long years and everything has changed. What happens when you pull back the mask and find the darkness within? What happens when you see that they’re broken?

𝔞/𝔫: in regards to the banner above...yes tae if i also looked like you i would want to kiss myself too

𝔴𝔞𝔯𝔫𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔰: cliffhangers | angst | fluff | slight mentions of self hatred | depression | mental health illness | self harm | occurs in the year 2024 | set in a timeline where BTS went to the military together | slight language

tags: @kookaine | @fangirl125reader | @kookiebbyxx | @taradevonne | @rae-bear |@mangminnie | @pixiekooo

Some people are connected.

Aren't they?

When you meet them, it’s as though something clicks. Something inside that tells you some unimaginable being has brought you together. A hidden string tying you to the other, drawing you slowly across the universe just to meet each other.

And once you’re connected…

Do you ever really let go of them?

Groaning, Taeyhung turns over in his bed for the thousandth time.

Why is this so hard?

Letting out an exasperated sigh, he lies on his back, sheets and comforter scattered, as he stares up at the ceiling. Glaring up at it with his eyebrows furrowed tightly together, he purses his lip into a pout, his jaw set defiantly.

“This is your fault.” He mutters underneath his breath, before running his hand absentmindedly through the tangled locks of his hair. “I don’t know how...but all of this is your fault.”

When the ceiling doesn’t answer him, he gives it a look before rolling out of bed, not really caring if he brings the covers along with him. As they fall from the tangles around his body, and rest safely on the floor, he catches the reflection of his eyes in the full-length mirror he keeps expertly held on the sliding door which hides his clothes closet. Biting his lip, he hesitates a bit before heading over to the mirror and taking his reflection in.

He’s grown a bit taller...perhaps half an inch. Don’t worry Namjoon hyung, one day I’ll be as tall as you. Though he smirks a bit at the thought, it quickly vanishes as his gaze travels to more points in his reflection. His dark glazed eyes, his mess of curls resting on his head, his slightly pale lips. Almost despondent, he pulls aside the already halfway buttoned down shirt and presses his fingers against his stomach. He smiles back to when all that was there was a soft belly. When he didn’t care as much.

When did he start caring?

Was it when he saw everything that ARMYs felt about him? When he realized just how double sided they could be? Was it when he realized that they really did care what he showed them? That if he showed them who he really was…

They would just walk away?

He knows he probably shouldn’t have read those comments, that he shouldn't have seen what some people have said...but did they forget that he could see everything they said?

Did they forget how much he gave...how much he sacrificed for them?

And when he shows them all of him…

The good and the bad…

"Kim Taehyung seems a bit rude…

He doesn’t care at all about BTS.

You think he needs them? If he were given a chance he would just leave.

Kim Taehyung is too moody. He’s happy one moment but sad the next.

Don’t you think fame has changed him? He seems so cocky.

What’s wrong with Kim Taehyung lately? Doesn’t he seem depressed?

Honestly, if I had to put my money on it, he’d be the first one to leave.

He’s so untalented.

BTS is filled with a group of 6 very talented, beautiful, and handsome young men. And then there’s the roach called Kim Taehyung.

Why doesn’t Kim Taehyung just leave? If you’re really bored with everything by now, why don’t you just leave?

Do us a favor and stop pretending.

Just leave."

Taehyung winces at the overwhelming amount of bad memories slamming into his inner consciousness. He tries to forget them, but every time he looks in the mirror, he can see them reflected back at him. As though they were burned deep into his skin. As though the sign of hard muscle beneath his fingertips is a scar he can’t escape.

The only thing he can remember, the only thing he can think about when he sees himself, is what they have molded him into.

The beautiful, the perfect sculpture which they call V.

Defiantly, flames burning in his eyes, he meets his gaze in the mirror. Anger and hurt mixing together into one painful chaos inside his chest, his gaze darkens before he swings back his fist and rams it deep into the mirror. As the glass shatters and sharp, iridescent pieces dig maliciously into his skin, he breathes heavily and glares up at his broken reflection. Into the dull dim hue of his hazelnut haze.

Eyes which have changed from bright beautiful saucers that could only see the sky...

To a gap of emptiness which cannot be filled.

Reflecting the cold abyss he feels in his own heart.

As thick blood begins to numbingly ooze from the cuts in his skin, he hardly flinches. The iron taste playing sinisterly on his lips, he can’t help but relish in the pain. Is this what he deserves? Is this what they want now that he’s not who he was before? Now that he’s grown, changed even the slightest bit? He almost wants to push his fist deeper into the glass, deepen the pain, all to distract him from the roar in his ears.

The constant screaming inside his mind.

He did everything they wanted him to do. He smiled for them, hid the inner part of him screaming, brushed away any hateful comments, any people who hurt him, and laughed through all the pain. He became a bigger person and grew.

He did it all for them.

He did it all for the sake of BTS.

Because he loved ARMY. Because he loved his hyungs.

Because this was his dream.

He became the man they all wanted.

He became V.

So why?

Why is it the moment he starts to let go of the mask, the moment he starts to become himself in front of their eyes...

Why do they turn against him as though he had never existed in the first place?

As though they didn’t beg him to hide.

As though all his efforts…

Meant nothing after all.

The worst part of it all…

Was that he let go for them.

Because he wasn’t willing to say goodbye.

The soft ring of his alarm breaks him out of his thoughts and his hand falls to his side as he turns to the sound. Sighing, he runs his hand through his tangled mess of hair picking up a tissue on the way to his dresser, and wiping off the thin trails of blood the cuts brought forth. In the back of his mind, he scoffs at the fact that that’s the third mirror he’s broken this week. Perhaps he needs a break. Looking up at the ceiling, he takes a deep breath.

A break from myself.

Picking up the phone he quickly dismisses the alarm, and finds himself staring at the lock screen in dismay.

To this day, Taehyung still uses the Galaxy BTS phone made especially for them and ARMY. Jimin absolutely loved the thing, and Taehyung treasures it with a quiet wonder. When he finally moved everything from his old phone to this one, he used it daily, even if it wasn’t always in front of the cameras. Back then when they had to leave for a while, looking at it gave him strength to go on. To head back to them. To see ARMY again.

Looking at it now, he wonders if it’s actually real.

If the love ARMY gives them…

Isn’t all just a lie.

When the phone buzzes suddenly, Taehyung lets out a small yelp, fumbling as his phone flies halfway in the air. Luckily, he’s able to catch it before it falls. Letting out a small breath of relief, he checks the random message that has popped up on his lock screen, peering to see who it belongs to.

Eyes widening, he nearly drops his phone again.

Stumbling to catch it, he falls on top of his pile of sheets and blankets, but thankfully the phone falls in his outstretched hands securely.

It's you.

Why is it always you?

Shocked, he slowly unlocks the phone, opening your little message. As it pulls up on his screen, he softly smiles.

Good morning, Mr. Pan.

It's such a simple message. Such short, sweet words said out of consideration and kindness. You sent it as a second thought, somehow knowing that he might need a smile after the amount of trouble he must have gotten in yesterday. He doesn't know this. All he knows is that a mere mention from you has made everything all right again.

It clears his mind, allows him to focus, saves him from the darkness continuing to choke him in its hold.

He picks up his phone and presses a button, before holding it up to his ear. It rings into the dead silence for a couple of seconds, making Taehyung a bit nervous. For a moment, he doesn't know if you're going to pick up, but once he hears the familiar click and the steady sound of your breathing, he can feel a rush of relief spreading through his body and leaving nothing but happiness.

"Hello?" You nearly whisper, a bit in shock. He can hear it over the phone and, sitting up, he doesn't notice as the gorgeous smile grows.

It’s funny how he didn’t realize until he heard your voice, that his head and his mind was filled with thoughts of you.

On the other line, you smile softly, finding the same truth.

Was it only yesterday that your dream came true?

He finally did it. He spoke to you.

Things should be over right?

But you find yourselves wanting…

More.

"Good morning." He teases in response to your recent message and you have to refrain yourself from groaning in embarrassment. "Did you sleep well?"

Hearing his innocent voice and the deep lure to it so early in the morning makes you wonder if you're dreaming. Smiling on the other line, you cup your hands around your phone, pulling it close to your cheek and smile, unable to stop the happy pink hue from creeping onto your rosy cheeks.

"Yes." You reply, a bit of excitement creeping into your voice from the giddy fact that you���re talking to him. "I slept like a baby...what about you?"

You decide to keep from him the fact that you hardly slept last night. Your constant nightmares and terrors of panic scared you. They made you afraid, thinking that if you closed your eyes, you would once more be lost in a deep sleep. Trapped in the hidden corners of your mind.

He smiles on the other line a bit sadly, deciding to keep the fact that he didn't sleep half the night to himself, lost in the whirlpool of hateful comments and slurs towards him. Towards BTS. He decides to hide the truth that the only thing that was able to let him sleep that night was the sight of your phone number held tightly within his hands.

"Yeah...yeah I slept alright." He says, unable to mask the catch in his voice. Your eyes widening in concern, you open your mouth to ask if he's alright, but he quickly clears his throat and changes the topic.

“How’s your ankle?” Even though you know he asked the question to change the subject, you can't help but wince.

Your ankle hasn’t shown much improvement.

The swelling has gone down and you're able to stand on it, but every time you try to walk, numb pain still courses up your veins. It's still pretty bruised, but what is there that you can do? You've already slipped on an ice pack, wrapping it carefully around your ankle to prepare you for the day, but you know it's going to be quite the uncomfortable ride.

You hesitate, pondering whether or not to tell him this, but he continues on the other line.

“Yen?” The way he whispers your name makes you melt inside. So concerned and full of worry, you wonder if you truly deserve this small blessing. The blessing to know someone like him. “Are you okay? Does it still hurt?”

The blessing to be able to speak to him.

Smiling, you shake your head before responding, slightly struck speechless.

“Yes, I’m fine...your ice pack yesterday really helped so I’m all ready to head to work today. Don't worry, I’m fully prepared with an ice pack of my own in case the bruise starts to bother me…” You start rambling, trying to reassure him that everything will be fine, while on the other line, his eyes go wide with protective anger.

You’re doing it again.

Forcing yourself to continue, when you should be looking to take care of yourself.

Not the other way around.

“No.” He says interrupting your slight tangent, and you flinch, pausing and your grip clenching tightly around the phone. You knew this would happen. You knew that he would be upset. That’s why you shouldn’t have said anything. Somehow, this frustrates you. You know it shouldn’t, after all he’s just looking after you, but you can take care of yourself. You aren’t some damsel in distress that needs saving.

Trying hard to forget what you’d rather not remember, you sigh, massaging your temple.

“Taehyung, I’m fine. I really am--”

“I don't believe you. And even if you were telling the truth, you should at least rest it for a day at least! Do you want to worsen it because you decided to push yourself?” Shocked at his sincere and concerned tone, you really don't know what to say. You know he’s right, but you can’t help but feel that if you listen to him, if you rest easy for just today, you’ll be letting someone down.

Namjoon is waiting for you.

He doesn’t know that your ankle is bruised, nor that you could sprain or quite possibly break it if you try to come into work today. But you’ve already been late once before. Today was supposed to be your first official day on the job. He was counting on you to be there.

Hoping that he’d be able to rely on you.

You can’t help but feel that if you decide to stay...that you'd be letting him down.

You don’t want to let him down.

You can’t let him down.

Glancing down at your ankle, you grimace a bit as you bitterly smile.

This is just a minor bump in the road isn’t it? All you're doing is offering a small sacrifice so that you can be there for him. So that you can carry out your job, your obligation as his manager. He should know that you will always be there to help. Isn’t that what a manager should do? You have a duty, an obligation...a simple bruise shouldn’t get in the way of that. After all the ways you let him down yesterday, and the kind way he treated you in spite of that...isn’t that the least you can do? You can afford to give something in return...after all he’s given you already.

Yes...this is nothing…

Taehyung wouldn’t understand…

Right?

Taking a deep breath, you respond to him.

“Taehyung, I really appreciate your concern but…”

“If you say you’re fine I am going to come to your apartment and force you back into your bed.” He replies so steadily and sternly that it’s hard for you to conceal your burst of laughter. He hears, however and grows a tiny bit offended, not willing to admit that the sound of your laughter brought a little bit more light into his clouded mind.

“You think I’m joking?!” He shouts on the other line, and you can’t keep it back anymore, your laughter spilling over and melodiously carrying itself through the line and into Taehyung’s small, scattered room. He smiles at the fact that he was able to make you laugh, although it wasn’t his intention. That just like that...you were able to make everything seem alright again. It’s almost as though a mere smile from you, a simple laugh escaping from your lips…

Makes the world a little bit brighter to him.

“I-I’m sorry…!” You manage to gasp out between your small fits of giggles. “It’s just the thought of you walking over here all angry and trying to force me back in bed…” You break off at the end, your sweet melodic laugh ringing high in the air once more, and he can’t help but crack a smile, eventually laughing along with you. After a moment, once the laughter subsides, each of you glance toward the phone as though that would help you see the other's face, or at least imagine it as though you were standing right next to each other.

Taehyung smiles a bit before glancing away and closing his eyes in serenity.

“Yen?” he murmurs softly, his eyes opening a fraction of an inch as he stares into the distance, almost imagining your smiling face right in front of him. At the sound of him saying your name once more, your eyes flash towards the phone, a bit surprised. It takes you a moment, but you eventually answer, a small smile growing on your lips.

“Yes?” you respond, your hands once more finding themselves cupping around the phone almost as if you held onto it a little bit tighter he would magically stay with you just a little bit longer. Offer you this comfort for just a bit more.

Is that too much to ask?

You know it is and yet you can’t help yourself from wishing for it.

Wishing that you had...more.

“I want you to know that I’m saying this with the best interests for you in mind.” He answers, and your brow crinkles a bit, wondering what he’s going to do this time. Taking a deep breath, he ponders whether or not to say the words, but he decides to do it anyway. Your safety is the most important after all.

“Don’t come to work today. Please stay home, and take care of yourself. I don’t want to see you get hurt.”

Startled, you open your mouth to answer, to refuse the kind request, to let him know that you’re going to head to work anyway, but he’s already hung up the phone, leaving you dumbfounded. Your heart pacing a million miles per hour, his last few words lingering in your mind.

I don’t want to see you get hurt.

“Who gave you the right?” you murmur softly, your hands rising furiously to hide the growing hot blush against your cheeks against your will. The hot tears that begin to push against your eyes, threatening to escape out of the cage you have held them in for so long.

“Who told you to care so much about me?”

Taehyung, after hanging up the phone, has completely forgotten about everything else but you. He smiles a bit sheepishly at the cheesy things he’s said and stares at the empty screen where your profile pic rests, safe in his contacts. He can’t help but wonder how you do it.

How with a few simple words…

You make everything okay again.

Turning to his closet, he starts to pull out a couple of clothes to wear that day, as he dials a number on his phone. Once it starts to ring, he places it on his dresser, putting it on speaker phone so he can hear the clear annoyed voice that answers, no doubt being distracted from an important source of work.

“What is it, Taehyung?” he snaps, tired and worn-out, and Tae smiles at the familiar greeting, as he pulls off his shirt, avoiding the cracked mirror beside him.

“Nice to talk to you too, Namjoonie. How's the album coming?” He responds playfully, and Namjoon on the other line can't help but smile. He adores that nickname, and it definitely puts him in a better mood. Just like Taehyung knew it would. Turning back to the screen of the computer, Namjoon can't help but sigh. There’s a whole lot of work to be made with the album...and such little time to do it in.

“Well...it’d go a lot faster without interruptions like this. What is it Taehyung-ah? This better not be a prank call or something for a Vlive…” Namjoon begins, his tone warning and Tae can’t help but laugh. He shakes his head, pulling down his pajama pants, and deciding to replace them with plain blue jeans. They don’t really have dance practice planned today, just a bunch of meetings and preparations for the album...maybe even a photo shoot.

“You know I try to stay away from Vlive’s nowadays.” Tae replies, trying to keep the bitterness out of his voice, but failing miserably. At the comment, Namjoon can’t help but feel a stab of pity and regret. He knows that it’s a sensitive topic for Tae now...especially with what happened the last time Taehyung held a Vlive….he shouldn’t have mentioned it so soon.

“No it's not...Namjoon it’s about Yen.” Tae explains, and at the mention of your name, Namjoon sits straight in his chair, work forgotten, and mind focusing on you.

“What? Is she okay? Did something happen? Is she--” Voice heavily decorated with worry, Tae has to bite back the laugh that threatens to be released. Is this how he sounded to you? No wonder you started laughing at him. Smiling softly at how open and kind Namjoons heart is, Tae shakes his head once more, pulling on a grey hoodie.

“Actually I wanted to talk to you about that.” Tae replies, as he pulls on his socks, and rummages for his jean jacket. Namjoon waits a bit impatiently on the other line, trying his best to be polite and wait for Taehyung to finish. Once he finds it, Tae lets out a small cry of victory before looping his arms through it and finishing his look. Picking up the phone as he grabs a plain white mask and heads for the door, Taehyung smiles slightly at his victory.

Try to refuse staying home after this, my Wendy.

Just as RM opens his mouth to demand a straight answer from him, Taehyung replies, leaving behind the mess he had made just moments before untouched and forgotten.

“Namjoon...could you do a favor for me?”

𝔫𝔬𝔱𝔢: this chapter was kind of sad...

chapter 22 here

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check my BTS masterlist for other BTS content

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[camiddletonxox]

Meeting the Crazy Family Part 1 - Reunions and Introductions

Pairing - Justin Mercado x Charity Middleton

Triggers/Warnings - None, this is just a fluffy general story where Justin meets Charity’s family

Note - This is a AU Universe where Charity is a doctor and her family are crazy she has a french mother, English dads who are her same-sex parents, and a Italian stepfather, but Justin is still a events planner

Note - Mia Bella Bambino means my beautiful baby, Ciao means hello, Mon Dieu means my god in french, c’est vraiment means it really is in french, and Magnifique is French for magnificent and mémé is grandma in french. Mama and Papa is how she addresses her mother and her stepfather. And she addresses her biological dad as Dad and her other dad as Da!

Taglist - @drakewalkerfantasy @ao719 @princess-geek @polishchoicesfan @binny1985 @desireepow-1986 @i-bloody-love-drake-walker @hatescapsicum @itscassandral @gardeningourmet @heauxplesslydevoted @thequeenofcronuts @kaavyaethanramsey @storyofmychoices @dailydoseofchoices @regencylady1810 @choicesficwriterscreations Please message me if you want adding to my taglist!

🌺🌺🌺

Summary - Charity goes to her mothers house with Justin to introduce her parents and family to Justin, but does he get the seal of approval from her fathers?

Word Count - 1342

🌸🌸🌸🌸

It had been almost 11 months since Charity and Justin had been dating officially and it felt so perfect, Charity would work her long shifts at the hospital and Justin would always be waiting at home to love her and cherish her.

Charity’s two fathers, Gavin and Martin, and her mother Suzanne were always asking her about the man who made her smile, her stepfather Paolo was always telling her that her mother was desperate to meet her boyfriend and she decided now was the time to introduce them to her amazing boyfriend. Charity and Justin were getting ready to head to her mothers house where her dads, stepdad, mother, her grandma and grandad and her brothers were.

“So anything I should know about your mother?” He asks and she grins.

“My mother is your usual mother, shes kind, caring, and she loves to make food for us, and she loves stargazer Lillies” she smiles.

“And your stepfather?” Justin questions and she grins.

“Papa is amazing, hes Italian, so loves pizza and him and my mama make plenty of food to go around” She grins.

“And your biological dad?” He asks and Charity smiled, finishing putting curls in her hair.

“My biological dad is the reason I became a paediatrics surgeon, he is amazing and he’s my hero, Gavin is my biological dad” she smiled.

“And your other Dad?” Justin asks.

“Da is amazing, he is a amazing neurosurgeon, but like Dad, he always had time for me as I grew up and I felt loved, him and Dad were my primary guardians growing him but mama and papa were always round, and I got to spend lots of time with them” Charity explains as she turns her straighteners off and puts perfume on, she wore a purple wrap dress with pink purple and blue flowers on, she wore the beautiful love heart diamond earrings Justin got her and the beautiful necklace she never took off and the promise ring he had previously bought her.

“Are we ready?” He asks and she nods and they head downstairs, Charity grabbing her bag and the bag of snacks, wine and a beautiful basket of flowers for her grandmother, and their overnight bags incase they stayed over and they got in the car.

“I just hope they like me” Justin admits and Charity beams.

“They will” she smiles and he drove the hour and half drive and they arrived at the beautiful large house her fathers had and she stepped out and Justin grabbed the other night bags as Charity grabbed the basket of flowers for grandma and her own bag and they walked to the front door and she knocked and immediately her stepfather stepped out.

“Charity, mia Bella bambino” her stepfather wrapped his arms around his stepdaughter, kissing the side of her head.

“Ciao Papa” she grins and he pulls away to see Justin kind of stood their awkwardly.

“Is this the gentleman you are so in love with beautiful girl?’ Paolo asks.

“Yes Papa, Justin this is my stepfather, Paolo, Papa this is my boyfriend, Justin” She introduced.

“eccellente. lovely to meet you Justin, please call me Paolo, son” Paolo beams and lets his stepdaughter and Justin in and a small girl ran through.

“Daddy, Aunt Charity and a strange man are here” The little girl cheered and Charity put her things down, taking the girl in her arms.

“Hey Emily, look at you, you have grown, the strange man is my boyfriend, Justin” she chuckled as her older brother, Alex, and Martin walk through.

“Hi strange man called Justin” Emily grinned and Justin put his hand out and the three year old shook his hand before wiggling so Charity put her down.

“Can I show strange man called Justin my doll house?” Emily squeaks.

“Maybe later, love, go and help mémé” Alex nods, and Charity grinned.

“Hey da” she wrapped her arms around her dad, squeezing him tight.

“Hey sweetheart, you look gorgeous, hope your trip here wasn’t too tiring” Martin beams as his husband walks in.

“Hey baby girl” Gavin beams, joining in the cuddle with his husband and daughter.

“Hi Dad! I missed you both loads, since i barely see you at work at the moment” she grinned and martin let Gavin hug her for a long moment, Justins heart melted at how close she was to her family.

“You must be Justin” Martin beams.

“I am Mr Middleton” Justin says, his palms getting sweaty all a sudden.

“Its a true pleasure to meet the man who makes our princess so happy, welcome to the family” Martin grins, shaking his head and Charity smiled with pride seeing her father immediately welcome her boyfriend, her arm around Gavin.

“Wow, Da, i was expecting the dont hurt my daughter speech, or I’ll kill you speech from you” Charity laughed and Martin shook his head.

“Granddad, Alex, Dad and your mother can do that, Chairy” Martin insists, before winking.

“Where is my mother?” Charity questions.

“Just in the kitchen” Gavin says and Charity quickly grabbed Justins hand, pulling him in to save Justin from any awkward conversations.

“You are very close to your fathers, all three by the looks of it” Justin observed and she grinned.

“They are the reason I wanted a man or partner who could love me as deeply as you do” Charity beams and they go through to the kitchen where it smells of freshly made food.

“Mama” Charity beams and the older brown haired woman beamed at the sight of her girl and wrapped her arms around her.

“I missed you, sweetheart, how are you” Suzanne asked her daughter.

“Its so good to see you mama, I’m ok, work has been crazy lately” She says.

“C’est Vraiment, i can imagine my darling, this must be your lovely boyfriend, Justin, it is a pleasure to finally meet you” Her mother beams, wrapping Justin in a hug.

“I brought you some stargazer Lillies, Charity mentioned they were your favourite” Justin said nervously, presenting the older woman with the Lillies.

“Mon dieu, they are magnifique, you have a true keeper here, Charity” her mother beamed and Charity nodded in agreement.

“Can I get you two a drink, its too early for wine so maybe a coffee?” Suzanne offers.

“Can I have a hazelnut coffee, and Justin will just have a black coffee, mama, please” Charity asks and her mother nods and makes coffee.

“I must admit, Charity, I was expecting more a snob from what you told me” Suzanne admits, passing them coffee and Charity blushes from embarrassment and Justin raised an eyebrow and she flashed a apologetic smile him.

“He’s not that bad, mama, he has his moments but he is a true gent and I feel happy and in love” she beams and her mother just smiles, he must be a special man, Gavin and Martin walked through.

“So do you think he needs the speech from Dad” Martin teases.

“NO! Not from either of you, you can trust him Dad, Da, hes the most amazing man I have ever met and been with” she assures her fathers who just smile with pride, their daughter deserved someone special and they could see that someone special was Justin. Just the way their daughter gazed at Justin and the way Justin gazed adoringly back.

“I see, well” Gavin starts, a unreadable expression on his face and Charity went pale, don’t be annoying, she prayed before Gavin grinned, “Welcome to the family Justin, its very clear you make our daughter happy and thats all we could ask for” he smiles and Charity visibly relaxes.

“Come meet the rest of the family, Charity’s grandparents are eager to meet you” Gavin smiled to Justin and Charity and Justin walked in the living room where her brothers Alex and William were deep in conversation, Adams wife and William’s were chatting and her two nieces and two nephews were playing, and her grandparents were talking, and all she prayed were her family wouldn’t embarrass her.

[ebhenah]

Klance AU Month Feb 1: Coffee Shop

Gross Klance AU Month- Feb 1: Coffee Shop (A Future Klance-Family fic)

“I don’t like it here,” Lucas grumbled, poking at the sodden mittens his Papi had draped over the heating vent.

“Stop picking at them let them dry,” Lance sighed, pushing a literal bucket of cocoa across the table. Keith would grumble about portion size, but Keith hadn’t had to try to entertain Lucas and Kashi all day and Lance was hoping sugar and chocolate overdosing the boys would buy him like… ten minutes of pleasantness. Please, God… just, TEN minutes! “Here you go, the biggest cocoas they had, with caramel syrup, extra whipped cream and chocolate shavings for Lucas…. And the same, but with hazelnut syrup and cinnamon instead for Kashi. And cafe con leche for me.” He wrapped his cold hands around the mug and breathed in the heavenly smell.

“I don’t like weather,” Kashi said, “I like when the air doesn’t have STUFF in it- snow, ice, water droplets… just… no.”

“Yeah,” Lucas jutted a thumb out toward his brother, “what he said! On the Atlas, it is never too cold, or too hot, there’s never rain or… whatever THAT stuff is!”

“Sleet,” Lance supplied, “that stuff is sleet… and I’m not a fan either.”

“Why would Thace even WANT to go to college in a place where the AIR throws ICE in your face???” Kashi huffed. He was not a fan of his eldest brother moving away for college in the first place… which meant that neither was Lucas… and they’d both been SO vocal about it that when it came time to do campus tours, it quickly had been evident that the youngest pair of their five kids needed to be occupied elsewhere.

So, HIS day had been miserable. Fingers crossed that Keith had had better luck with Thace and the twins.

“This school has an EXCELLENT Engineering program,” Lance reminded them.

“Better than apprenticing under Uncle Hunk on the Atlas?” scoffed Lucas.

“Yes… and even Hunk would say that. Hunk recommended this program to us in the first place.”

“Boston sucks,” Kashi muttered.

“No, it doesn’t. Today was just… not a great day.” Tweens would be the death of him. They really would. It was like his sons had lost the ability to feel joy if one of their parents was in the room. “We can’t control the weather.”

“You can on the ATLAS!”

“Lucas,” he sighed, “we’ve talked about this…”

“No one has made a final decision but Thace deserves to have all the information before he does yadda yadda yadda…” Kashi pushed some whipped cream around with his spoon, looking for all the world like a tiny, sullen Keith (with a SENSIBLE haircut, thankyouverymuch). It took every scrap of willpower Lance possessed not to pinch his cheek. It was endearing how much the younger boys hated the idea of their big brother moving out. So endearing that he didn’t have the heart to tell them that there was virtually no way Thace was going to decide to stay on the Atlas with them when the option was to live on campus WITH his long-term girlfriend.

Because his firstborn was 18 and in love and thought himself all grown up and ready to take on the world, and Lance couldn’t say a peep, because when he was 18 and in love he was on the front lines of a war, pining for his teammate, and making far dumber decisions than Thace was likely to.

The bell at the door chimed and they were hit with a blast of cold air carrying the exhausted voice of his husband. “Would you three knock it off, already?!? Rai, you don’t get a vote on where Thace goes to school. Talia- we KNOW you are planning on Olkarion, stop bringing it up. Thace- weather is not a factor in your decision, understood?”

“But there is actual SLUSH falling out of the sky,” Thace pointed out. “I don’t want to live where the sky throws slush at me.”

“It’s sleet!” Lucas chimed helpfully, his mood vastly improved by Thace’s apparent rejection of this school.

“Maybe Juanita LIKES sluuu-sleet,” teased Talia, “what will you do then?”

“We’ll have a conversation and make a decision together,” replied Thace, “what are you going to do if Bailey doesn’t want to move to a whole other galaxy for school?”

“Oh. My. God! Bailey and I are like baaaaaarely even dating! I’m not making any decisions about school based on a guy I am just like… kinda, sorta seeing.”

“Uh-huh,” mumbled Rai, “barely even dating… just fused at the mouth 24/7.”

“What’s this now?” Lance asked, prompting his daughter smack her twin and turn beet red.

“NOTHING!” She yelped, “I’ll order the drinks! Thace come help me!”

Keith just shook his head at them as he pulled his gloves off and set them next to the boys’ mittens on the heater. He was peeling out of his scarf when he caught Lance’s eyes and smiled, tension melting out of his features. Lance’s heart skipped a beat and his belly flipped and he felt his smile turn giddy from the look on his husband’s face. “Hi,” purred Keith, leaning in to kiss Lance gently as he sat in the chair beside him.

“Hi yourself,” Lance answered as the kiss broke.

“GROSS!” chorused all five children.

“Ugh, save it for your ‘naps’, weirdos,” drawled Rai, using finger quotes and rolling his eyes.

“Hey, knock it off,” Lance countered, “that was just a little hello kiss… it could be soooo much worse…”

“I doubt it,” mumbled Lucas.

“Ohhh was that…”

“No! No, it wasn’t anything!” Kashi elbowed Lucas.

“Did I... did I hear someone…

“Nothing! He said nothing!” insisted Rai.

“No, no… I think I did!”

“Papi! No! I didn’t!” squawked Lucas.

“Yeah, yeah… I DEFINITELY heard someone issue ME, Loverboy Lancey Lance Kogane, Pilot of the Red Lion, a challenge…”

Keith cackled, as the kids groaned, “now you’ve done it, boys. You know what he’s like…”

Lance turned his chair, then yanked Keith’s closer, “heya handsome.”

“Hi, babe,” Keith answered.

“You look cold,” Lance observed, leaning close, “which seems impossible for someone as hot as you are.”

“Kill me now,” muttered Rai.

“This is YOUR fault,” Kashi hissed to Lucas.

“You offering to warm me up if I am?” laughed Keith, his cheeks flushing.

“Oh, you know I am,” he tangled his fingers with Keith’s, “you’ve got really nice hands, did you know that?”

“Stop it,” whimpered Lucas.

“So do you,” Keith replied, rubbing his thumb across the back of Lance’s hand. “Long fingers… like a musician.”

“I do play a little guitar,” he scooted even closer. “You’re gorgeous… you look like you could be a rock star… little bit of a bad boy vibe going on.”

Keith laughed, his eyes dancing, “I’m more of a martial arts kind of guy than a musical one.”

“What… What is happening here?” Talia asked, her voice stunned.

“They were being gross,” Kashi answered.

“Were? WERE?! This is ARE! They ARE being gross!! Why are they STILL being gross?”

“Lucas,” muttered Rai.

“That’s really hot,” Lance continued, “but I bet I could make you sing like a bird.”

“MY EARS!” Thace yelped, “I can never unhear that!”

“Lucas? What. Did. You. DO?” Talia turned pointedly AWAY from her fathers, shielding her eyes with the coffee in her hands.

“Papi said they could be worse and Lucas said he doubted it,” Rai explained.

“Nope!” She said setting Keith’s coffee in front of him. “I’m not sitting with them. I’m sitting… uhh… over there. Bye!”

“Yeah, I’m joining you,” Thace agreed, handing Rai his drink. “Have fun with… all that, guys.”

“I hate them,” Rai muttered.

“You sound pretty confident,” laughed Keith, cheeks blazing now. He was happy to indulge Lance’s competitive streak and make the kids squirm, because… well.. Payback, honestly. They’d been awful all day… and who the heck complains about their parents GETTING ALONG!?!?

“I do, don’t I?” Lance grinned, waggling his eyebrows.

“OKAY YOU WIN!” squawked Lucas, “you were right! The kiss was nothing. This is way grosser. Stop! Please stop!”

“But… this is fun,” pouted Lance.

“You won, Loverboy,” chuckled his husband, “give the kids a break. You can flirt later when they aren’t around.”

Lance’s expression brightened and he leaned in to kiss Keith’s cheek, “promise?”

Keith rolled his eyes, “yes, I promise. Rai… go get your brother and sister… the little melodramatic pair of them.”

Rai sighed, but left the table, and Lance gestured to the younger boys. “I have been informed that our sons do not like ‘weather’.”

“They don’t, huh?” Keith wasn’t sure where Lance was going with this.

“I think they’ve been spoiled by the climate controlled life aboard the Atlas,” he explained.

“I don’t like where this is going,” whispered Kashi.

“Sooo, I’m thinking we should maybe trying living on the surface for a couple of years,” he finished cheerfully, “and commute.”

“You want to commute?” Keith confirmed.

“Yeah, I think it would be good for the kids.”

“To the Atlas?”

He nodded.

“In orbit.”

“The Lions can do it in no time flat.”

“Everyday?”

“Mmhmm…”

“Lance that’s…” he shook his head, “that would be a nightmare, babe!”

“What would be a nightmare?” Talia asked.

“Papi is talking about moving to the SURFACE,” Kashi hissed.

“Like… Cuba? Cuba would be cool,” Rai said, dropping into a chair, “I could work at the shop with Tio Luis after school.”

“Ummm… Do I get a vote? Because I don’t want to change schools!”

“No one is talking about changing schools,” Keith assured her.

“Then how is he going to work at Tio Luis’ shop?”

“We’re moving? Why are we moving?”

“Woah- everyone calm down,” Keith’s voice cut through the din, “we are in public and getting loud. Not acceptable. Everyone sit. Papi had an IDEA. That is all. It’s barely been mentioned let alone discussed or decided.”

“But if it goes anywhere,” Lance interjected, “we will have a family meeting and you will ALL have a chance to talk as much as you want about what you think of it. We are a team, and Team Kogane works together. Right?”

They all murmured their agreement, and settled into chairs, the table going quiet for a moment as the idea of leaving the Atlas bounced around. Talia’s phone bleated and she pulled it out, the smile on her face when she saw the text betraying the sender. “Say hi to Baiiiii-leeee,” crooned Lucas.

“Really, kid?” sighed Lance, “again? I’m telling you, youngest to youngest, you are going to REGRET giving them a hard time about the people they date when you start dating. Older siblings hold grudges. I promise you, this,” he gestured at Talia and Thace, “whole thing you’ve got going on? It’s going to kick you in the butt. Mark my words.”

“He is speaking from experience,” agreed Keith, “they gave him SUCH a hard time about Allura!”

“ALLURA!?!?” the children chorused.

“Way to blurt THAT out, Mullet,” Lance muttered.

“Hold on,” Talia tore her attention away from the phone, “you and Auntie Allura were a thing?”

“Not so much a thing, no,” Lance sighed, “there was A date. One single date. That proved to both of us that we were not meant to be a couple.”

“Then why did they give you a hard time?” asked Rai.

Lance glared at his husband, “I’m going to divorce you. I’m going to divorce you and this will be the reason. You understand that, right?”

“You don’t scare me. You’re not going to divorce me,” Keith chuckled, “you threaten to divorce me every day. I’m immune to the divorce talk.”

Lance gasped dramatically, clucking his tongue and shaking his head. “Just you watch me! DIVORCE!”

“Not gonna happen,” Keith said calmly, “they gave him a hard time because of all the blushing and pining.”

“Awww,” cooed Thace, “how cyoooot! Papi had a CRUSH on the Princess!”

“Are you implying that Allura of Altea is NOT crush-worthy?” Lance asked.

“What?” Thace went pale, “I didn’t say that! Please don’t tell Auntie Allura I said that! Oh… GOD! Please don’t tell CORAN I said that!!”

“He had it BAD for Allura from the moment he met her,” Keith supplied, ready to save Thace from his own panic.

“A literal Princess literally fell into my arms, and then told us we were destined to be heroes,” Lance pointed out. “It was like something out of a fairytale.”

“You’ve always been a hopeless romantic,” Keith chuckled.

“By the time we got back to Earth I didn’t see her that way anymore though. I’d just gotten used to the idea of being in love with her and it being hopeless…”

“But, you said you went on a date? And Dad said there was blushing.”

“I don’t remember saying your Papi was the one doing the blushing,” tsked Keith.

“Yes. ONE date. She came to dinner with my family. We went for a walk. There was a very sweet kiss. It was a lovely date. I remember it fondly. But, mainly because it was what made Allura and I see each other clearly for the first time, which is why we can be such good friends now.”

“What did YOU think of the whole date thing?” Talia asked Keith.

“Ohhhh, GOOD question!” Lance turned to smile at him, “I can’t believe I never thought to ask you that!”

“I… wanted my friends to be happy. If that was with each other, then the important thing was that they were happy,” Keith answered. “But… if they weren’t… then I needed to smarten up and make some changes.”

“Changes?” Rai echoed, “what kind of changes?”

“I….” Keith faltered.

Lance slipped his hand over Keith’s, “he wasn’t ready for a serious relationship then. He knew I wanted…. All this. Marriage. Kids. You guys. He did, too… he just didn’t know HOW to make this work and had to figure it out.”

“So… you guys were already in love when you went out with Allura?” Lucas asked.

“I don’t think either of us had figured that out yet,” Keith laughed.

“Kissing Allura made it pretty clear to me,” Lance said, “I knew what it SHOULD feel like and it… was nice. Sweet… but not the same.”

“The same?” Kashi narrowed his eyes, “you guys had ALREADY kissed!”

“How did we end up talking about this?” Keith asked no one in particular. “Guys, we were in space a long time. We didn’t know we were falling in love, but that doesn’t mean there wasn’t interest. Okay?”

“But-”

“Hold up!” Lance laughed, “I will tell you guys the whole story, if you want me to… buuuuut I will remind you that you think us kissing each other hello is gross. So, be absolutely SURE you want to hear the answer before you ask any more questions about the two teenage boys we were back then. Okay? Okay.”

“Eww,” Lucas made a face. Rai and Thace blushed. Talia rolled her eyes, and Kashi was visibly debating whether he should ask something.

“No gross stuff… but if YOU knew after you kissed Allura,” Kashi started, “when did YOU know?”

“When did I know I was in love with your Papi?” Keith clarified. Kashi nodded and he sat back, thinking. “I don’t think I really had like a moment where I went ‘oh, I love him’. For me, it was more like… he kept getting a little more important to me and then a little more and a little more… and eventually being able to offer what he deserved was more important than the stuff I was afraid of. It was easier to get myself together than it was to live without him. It was easier to stay than to go.” He sighed, “I’m making myself sound really lazy. None of that stuff was EASY. It was REALLY hard to stop being afraid of getting left behind. It was REALLY hard to learn how to be part of a couple, and to work through the fights and the hurt feelings. All that was so much harder than anything I’d ever done. But being HAPPY with Lance was the easiest thing in the world… and NOT doing the other stuff? Like, staying away and not being with him, that was IMPOSSIBLE. Keeping people at a distance used to be easy for me, but I could NOT do that with him, so I had to figure out how to be close.”

“Awwww, Mullet,” Lance cooed, lifting Keith’s hand to kiss his knuckles. “You never told me any of that.”

“Okay, but WHEN,” Kashi asked again, exasperated, “when’s the FIRST time you remember knowing that you were in love with Papi?”

“In the Quantum Abyss,” Keith said after a moment, “that’s when I knew it wasn’t just an interest… when it could be something real. When I didn’t know if I would ever see the others again, and how much MORE it hurt to think that I’d never see Lance again… Yeah. That’s when I knew something had changed.”

“So… you completely changed who you were, for a guy?” Talia asked, “aren’t you always telling us NOT to do that?”

“He didn’t change who he was,” Lance said quickly, “he is still the same hot-headed, stubborn, brave, awkward, loyal, quick-thinking, introverted, amazing guy he always was. He just faced his fears and dealt with the shit that was holding him back. He COULD do that because of who he really is. If you find someone who makes you want to face your fears and slog through the darkest parts of you to be with them, we’ll support that. That is NOT the same as pretending to like American football and hate ACTUAL football, or not talking about being Cuban, or doing things you know are wrong to impress someone.”

“Okay, okay,” she rolled her eyes, “geez!”

“So… when did you actually get together?” Lucas asked, “like, officially.”

“Our very first official date was the second of April before my twentieth birthday,” Lance said with certainty.

“It would have been the first, but he didn’t want to risk it being a prank,” explained Keith.

“And then you dated for how long?” asked Kashi.

“We got engaged that December… he proposed at the ice skating rink- you guys know that story,” Lance supplied, “and we were engaged a year and a half before the wedding.”

“That’s not that long. Juanita and I have been together longer than that,” Thace mused.

“Don’t even think about using us as some kind of relationship planner,” Keith laughed, “I was stuck on a Space Whale for two years, then we all jumped ahead three… and we were a mess in the beginning. You and Juanita set your own pace. There’s no rush.”

“Any last questions?” Lance asked, “I promise, I’ll answer ANYTHING you ask me…” He waited a moment and when no one spoke up and he was greeted with assorted variations on a head shake he polished off his coffee, “alright. Good. Now, Thace, what was your FAVORITE thing about the campus?”

“My favorite?” Thace thought for a moment, blue eyes flashing, “the robotics lab. They had tech there that was amazing. So much more variety than what we have on the Atlas!”

“Really?” Talia interjected, “I thought you were all about library, with that interactive study support program?”

“Yeah, that was pretty impressive, too.” He launched into a description of the holographic tutors and test prep programs the library offered. Which led to a discussion of how the engineering programs were structured and what he liked and didn’t like about them. Before long the entire family was debating the pros and cons of the school. Keith went quiet, watching the most important people in the world to him laugh and talk and argue. His kids. His husband. Before long, Thace would be out on his own. Then the twins would be off to face the world. Even Kashi and Lucas were barrelling toward adulthood far too fast.

He stood heading to the counter to get a fresh round of drinks, because his brood of extroverts (and Rai, his sole introverted kid) would be hashing this out for a while, and the weather outside was anything but inviting.

“Excuse me?”

He turned, blinking in surprise when he realized that the person speaking to him was Galra, “yes?”

Her yellow eyes widened and her fluffy ears flattened slightly, “I’m sorry to disturb you… You are the Black Paladin, yes?”

“Yeah,” he answered with a smile, “I am. Can I help you?”

“I just…” she sighed, “I wanted to thank you. My father… he was a Blade of Marmora. I know you… you helped Kolivan after… everything. I never thought I’d get the chance… just… thank-you. Thank-you for making sure the Blades weren’t forgotten.”

“You don’t need to thank me for that,” he said in a rush, “the Blades were, to a man, among the strongest, bravest, most honorable men and women I have ever had the privilege of knowing. They deserve to be remembered and honored. I named my son after a Blade who sacrificed himself for me, for the mission. Without his work, his selflessness, we never would have been able to defeat Zarkon.” He nodded to the table, “the tall one with the brown hair, his name is Thace.”

“Thace?” she echoed, “his name is Thace?”

“Yeah,” he confirmed, “we’re touring colleges right now. He graduates in the spring. Oh… oh no… are you crying?” He grabbed a napkin from the counter for her.

She blotted at her eyes, nodding. “It’s alright… I’m fine… I just…” She took a shuddery breath and pulled out what he recognized as a Galran holo-locket and pressed it into his hand. “Look. This is my father.” He did as she asked, triggering the little projector. The light flickered for a moment, it must have taken damage somewhere along the way because the image glitched and blinked out before coming into focus. A handsome, familiar face appeared before him and time froze. His eyes flicked back to the woman, connecting her features to the hologram in front of him. He pulled her into a hug, “he was a great man. A GREAT man. A true hero.” Releasing her he cleared his throat. “Please… PLEASE come meet my family. They would be so honored.”

He bustled her over to the table of people quietly but animatedly discussing… cafeteria food, at the moment and rested his hand on Lance’s shoulder to get his attention. “Guys… your Dad has someone for you to meet,” Lance said, his voice serious enough that they all fell silent.

“Everyone… this is… oh, I never got YOUR name, I’m so sorry!”

She laughed awkwardly, waving off his concern, “I’m Dai’sa. My name is Dai’sa.”

“Dai’sa,” he repeated, “this is my husband Lance, the Red Paladin, and our children. That’s Lucas, by the window. Then the one that looks like me is Kashi. This is Talia, and her twin brother Rai… and this… this is Thace. Everyone, Dai’sa’s father was a Blade of Marmora.”

They fell over each other to offer their condolences and gratitude. Lance made a point of standing and shaking Dai’sa’s hand, repeating that the Blade is a family, and so she should consider them to be family, as well and generally being his charming, gracious self.

“Did you know her Dad?” Kashi asked after a moment.

“I… uh… I did, actually,” Keith answered, “he saved my life. We named your brother after him.”

“Thace?” Lance asked, astounded, “your father was Thace?”

She nodded, “did you know him, too?”

He shook his head, “no, I never got that honor. But I know he was a hero. He saved… thousands of lives, millions possibly. I am so sorry that the war took him from you. If you EVER need anything of us. Of Voltron, the Paladins, or… just… us… the Koganes. Please do not hesitate to ask.”

“Uh.. thank-you. Thank-you.”

“Hey, chiquito, come say hi,” he waved his son over. Thace was tall and long-limbed, like Lance and his sister Rachel, who’d carried him, but broader through the shoulders and a bit bulkier. He looked like the McClains, with his softly curled brown hair, blue eyes, and coppery skin, but you could see Keith in the shape of his eyes, the quirk of his smile, and in the way he moved and spoke.

“I’m Thace Kogane,” he said softly, “it is such an honor to meet you. To meet another child of the Blade… but YOU specifically, too. I want you to know, I am VERY proud of the name I carry. I am proud to be Galra, even if I am only one quarter Galra. I know I have very big shoes to fill, I hope I can live up to the legacy of the name I carry. I hope I can make you proud.”

“Thank-you,” she repeated, laughing and blotting at her eyes, “I feel like I have been saying nothing but that since I approached!”

“Well, you should stop,” Talia interjected, “because we are the ones thanking you… and we’ve all done that. So, how about, instead of us all tripping over one another in gratitude, you join us for a coffee and tell us all about the great man that brought us together?”

“Please,” Keith said, gesturing to an empty chair.

“Oh, no! I couldn’t possibly intrude! You are with your family!”

“The Blade IS a family,” Kashi insisted.

“There is plenty of room,” added Rai.

“Alright… if you insist…” Lance nodded to assure her that, yes, they really did and she took a seat. Keith hurried back to the counter, paying for Dai’sa’s order as well as his family’s and collected the tray that held all the drinks. He settled into his seat, clasping Lance’s hand in his own. Thace’s daughter. He’d had no idea that such a person even existed, but he could see the resemblance.

Lucas looked over at his parents and rolled his eyes, “thanks for joining us Dai’sa… you being here might actually keep them from being gross!”

[irndad]

this is not what i had planned- part 2

title: this is not what i had planned (part 2!)

HERE is part 1

ship: peter parker (17 yo) x reader

wc: 1.5k

a/n: HELLO IT IS OUT YOU HAVE FINALLY SEEN IT ALSO I THINK THERES GONNA BE A PART 3 

summary: peter and liz are going on a date! he doesn't want to! he also doesn’t like that the girl he’s in love with is on a date!

It’s a friday when it happens so he has the weekend to mourn his fake relationship, and the plan was to tell May that it was a mutual thing, that they decided they were better as friends.

Except his red and crying face doesn’t do much to prove that.

May brings him sweets and ice cream, all the stereotypical heart break things to help and they do, a bit but all he wants is to talk to her about this and he can’t because it’s over.

He’s so into it and so into her that all their photos in his room hurts to look at. Friends. Better as friends.

Better as friends and better apart and other lies he could tell himself don’t suffice right now because he’s in love with her.

He is in love in the way of feeling it, and in love with the how good it felt for her to be the one he gets to hold. For her to be the one he gets to call his girlfriend.

“Hey baby,” May calls in, sighing at her tear soaked son.

“Hey. I’m fine, Aunt May, really.” He tried a smile, which came out more as a grimace.

Suddenly his phone rings and it’s thee...heavenly one? He’s pretty sure he’s been meaning to set that one for Y/N, but Ned has set it for Liz, and shit, is Liz calling him?

“H-hello?”

“Hi Peter,” he hears her honeycomb sweet voice drench his senses and he can picture how lovely she looks calling him, maybe biting her lip from the nerves that obviously are filling her. But he always dreamed of her sounding nervous over him, his stomach isn’t flipping the way it does when his best friend says his name.

“I saw what happened yesterday, I wanted to make sure you were okay.” She sounds sincere and her voice is kind and warm but not her warmth.

“Yeah, I-I thought it over and really she was right. We are better as friends.”

The lies taste bitter on his tongue.

“Oh, uh, good.” She’s nervous, he can tell, but it’s not bringing those lovely spirals in his stomach and bringing the stutter to his voice she always did.

“Would you like to grab coffee today?” she speaks quickly and he always dreamed that she’s sound beautiful and lovely and incredible being like that to him-

But it’s not. She isn’t beautiful to him in the way of squeezed shut eyes doubled over in laughter or the blush pink of her lips. Liz is beautiful, but not his version of breathtaking. He is having an issue with this, because May is looking at him like he’s going to break.

“Y-yeah, I’d love to.”

May widens her eyes and he’s going to scream at her shock because everyone knows he’s in love with her, except for her.

Liz looks beautiful when they get coffee. It’s just fall and the colors are beautiful, not that you can tell in the city. She’s beautiful and lovely and she’s wearing a blue spotted dress and an adoring smile when they sit down, with a sophisticated drink she ordered for him herself.

He knows this is what he wanted, but it’s not what he wants anymore. This rings true when Liz’s gorgeous fingers touch his hands in the kind of thing that a girl does then she’s trying to be subtle about the fact she likes you.

(Y/N) was never subtle about it, which he supposed was part of the point, along with it being fake. But when her fingers brushed his a light smile always accompanied her lips and made him feel like she’d meant to do it.

Liz sips her latte and gives him his and it’s hazelnut, which she had no way of knowing he hates. She looks gorgeous in her pretty yellow dress and all Peter can think about is how low he is for going on a date when he’s in love with someone else.

Someone else.

Someone else who happened to walk into the same small coffee shop which Peter promised was like a hideaway (because it was, quite honestly, the only person he’d taken there was her) and she was there with a boy who had a smile like sunshine and had his arm around her shoulder.

Peter never did that with her, because he was nervous she’d find it a bit much. But this guy didn’t, obviously, with her. He was laughing and so was she and Peter is dying because she looks so beautiful when she’s smiling and he never really understood what her dreamy smile was until she gave it to him.

He was so enamored with every detail of her, and there she was, looking so lovely in a yellow dress and her warm eyes fond and her hand on a guys’ arm. She’s so pretty in that dress with the flowers and he. He adores her.

“Oh, is that (Y/N)?” Liz whispers like it’s some sort of secret that they share, but he doesn’t know how to share those kinds of secrets with anyone but (Y/N).

“She’s on a date!” Liz squeals, in honest excitement for his friend, maybe because they look so happy together, her yellow dress and bright, kind and lovely in the way she leans over to that guy makes Peter’s veins bulge because that should be him.

Well. Should is a strong word.

“She looks cute.” Liz says, politely sipping her drink, and she does. She does. She looks so fucking pretty and he remembers how she looked when she had that flirty look for him, that loving and gentle touch for him.

He’s on a date with Liz. The most beautiful girl he’d ever seen and the girl he’s liked since he was 11 when she flipped her hair in that swoosh way. But it was his best friend who yells at people who teased him when he was 11.

When he was 11 he’d still fight to spend his time with her and her most, and at 15 she was the one who patched him up after his fights and made him feel better no matter what happens.

Now, at 17, he’s so in love with this girl it’s incredible how he didn’t see it before, he always sees it everywhere heroes, now.

How cursed is it, to be like a ship in the night. Passing each other, perfect matches and fitting like puzzle pieces only to pass each other inevitable.

May seems to be his saving grace at this point, calling before the tears hit him like a punch.

“H-hey,” he answers before the warmth of her voice hits him, and he remembers how much May has mothered him, made him feel better when she’s not as around.

“Hey Peter, sorry to interrupt your, uh, date but I need you home to help me with something.”

“Something?”

“Something.”

And then he’s hastily telling Liz he has to leave and pecks her cheek and there’s no spark and nothing there.

He smiles as bright as he can at her but in the corner of his eye- he can see her in that yellow flower dress, all pretty and flirty and his stomach rolls.

Ship in the night, passed her before he even knew what he was losing.

May had him come for something stupid, getting a colander off a ledge.

He’s grateful anyway.

He gets a call from her the night, and her excited voice is the kind of thing that makes him smile from the inside out.

“What’s up?” He wants to tack on a “babe” on the end of it but knows he can’t and there it is, that vile taste in the back of his throat at everything he knows.

“Hey! I saw you and Liz at Starbucks! Did-“

“I saw you too, were you on a date?” He hates how accusatory his voice is but he wants to know, wants to know if he’s already lost her within a day of their “breakup”

“Kinda…” her voice lilts in that shy giggly way and it’s. It’s not fun. “He’s just a guy that asked me out and I have a major crush on this guy and I just needed a distraction.”

Good and bad news, he guesses because she wasn’t on a date, but he can’t deny the fucking ache in his chest when he hears she has a crush on someone. Someone who surely isn’t him. The thing is, he has more than a crush on her.

She’s the person he sees in everything and being with her means more than anything and her crush isn’t on him. I mean, it makes sense because he could never be the kind of boyfriend she deserves but that doesn’t stop him from wanting her.

“Crush?” He tries to force his voice to lift in that teasing friend way but really he’s fishing for the guy he wants to punch.

“Doesn’t matter. He’d never go for a girl like me. Either way, he likes someone else.”

“I think you’re wrong,” he says, fingers trembling around his phone, tears burning and sobs in the edge of his throat, and he loves her, and she loves someone else and he never heard of tragedies being so cliche.

“Maybe.”

tag list under the cut!

@frecklesholland @heckin-good-holland  @afoxwonderland  @radicalstars @once-upon-a-walking-wolf-demigod@thecreativeangel@barnesvogue @nedthegay @nevaehsuga @the-girl-with-no-plan @llotrr@uglygirlkk @macfullyloaded17@dianileesawsomeness@readixgkodie615@blamebangtan@emgrace728@nedslaptop @dangerousluv1 @midtownsparker @loverboy-holland  @princeofsassgard @rareunicorntris912 @sammy-holland @livingoffsavvyillusions @painterwithhope @spiderboytotherescue @yoitsnotkim

@pandartist

@vampireloveandfun @gracethegeek9902  @spectacularspiderman58 @not-reptilian   @ashleyhearto @thehollandcommittee @holtzmannnd @tmrhollandkay

[twistednuns]

August 2020

My students all told me that they'd be watching Outer Banks over the holidays, a US teen drama. I got curious and now I'm hooked. Another excellent series I binge-watched is The Umbrella Academy. For me it was one of the greatest moments in TV history when Klaus shared a piece of wisdom as a guru and told his devotee: Don't go chasing waterfalls.  Stick to the rivers and the lakes that you're used to. (the divine TLC lyrics)

Finally finishing my macrame hanging planter. Cleaning up the balcony and my apartment. Listening to the rain from bed.

The Happy Medium winery has amazing branding. Two eyes to look - one eye to see.

A really nice, solitary summer evening after a very frustrating, infuriating afternoon (nobody wanted to go swimming with me and I felt all the feelings and was too stubborn and lazy to go alone - very mature). After a 4-hour-nap I made some roasted veggies with tsatsiki, lit some candles outside and enjoyed my meal in the dark.

Learning about malaphors.

I just found out that my favourite French summer comedy of all times, Les Petits Mouchoirs, has a sequel!!! I'm so excited. Need to organise a movie night asap. [edit: We watched it in Ibiza and it was perfect! Need to see it again asap.]

I made a crazy delicious pot of rice the other night. It was more like a risotto with lemon and white wine. Roasted vegetables with lemon oil. I wanted to add parmesan but frankly, that would have ruined it. And that says a lot about the quality of a dish in my opinion!

Getting out of bed in the morning. Starting to organise, declutter, throw stuff out. Very grateful for past me. I love it when I'm in the mood for tasks I usually put off.

My very own custom-made bottle rack. I couldn't find anything fitting so I just made one myself and it's perfect.

Finding out what okra plants actually look like. I'd always assumed they grow like green beans.

Drinking Aperol Spritz on Becky's balcony. Talking about boobs, embarrassing her kids, looking at a friendship book her colleagues had given her as a parting gift. Cake, a tour of Rosi's Playmobil empire, talking about the expression of psychological issues through art. Talking non-stop, in fact. We often don't even manage to finish a topic and jump from thought to thought.

A hardware store date with Manu on a Friday evening. At sunset. Flowers, soft hugs. Trying on hats, finding the right things. Him walking home, me on a bike, jousting with the wooden stick I had just bought, singing. Ending up outside an Italian restaurant, ordering truffle oil pizza. And the gorgonzola. Oh my.

A fantastic bi-anthem from the TV show Crazy Ex-Girlfriend.

An afternoon at Maria Einsiedel. With Diego, Lorena and Daniela. But I met Claudia on the subway and she also wanted to go swimming so we just went together. So we kinda reconnected? We all sat in one place, Manu L. and Frank as well. Floating down the Eiskanal was perfect. And in the end I spent the whole evening with Frank and Claudia. Interesting development. Somehow people keep coming back into my life this month.

Harvesting my very own sun-ripened tomatoes.

An afternoon at the lake in Feldmoching with Sash and Lena. Naked dancers, serious volleyball seniors, jelly shoes. The story about flesh-eating pineapple. Chocolate-orange muffins and leftover salad. An accidental wasp-murder (it was drenched in oil so I had to put it out of its misery). Talking about moaners (or: when men are really loud during sex). And about getting old and lazy. I really want a beach chair now. Posture, eh? And comfort. Yeah, comfort.

"We gain sustenance from nature’s regeneration." An article about the therapeutic power of gardening. I absolutely have to read Sue Stuart-Smith's book which they're discussing. Warm-colored kilims hung from ancient rafters above a seating area furnished with tapestry-upholstered couches, sculptures perched on tables, and tall bookcases. The space had the atmosphere of Freud’s famous analytic study, but on a giant scale. A huge picture window framed the countryside beyond. An enormous honeysuckle, which looked as if it had flourished as long as the Stuart-Smiths’ marriage, climbed a dark, shingled wall and crept over the roof.

Dreaming about being held tightly. A warm embrace. The perfect energy exchange. Feeling protected and loved.

An evening at the outdoor cinema in Munich's Westpark with my boys Frank and Manu. We watched a rather forgettable French comedy but I loved spending time with those two. I felt at ease, protected, special. Always a plus: Krupuk ASMR!

Spending time with my mum. Harvesting blackberries for breakfast. Going to the healthfood store together. Looking for an e-bike and swimming goggles for me. Talking about my brother, my dad. Issues. Dinner on the veranda. Picking some of her crystals to take home with me. Very lovely and peaceful.

An extremely lazy week in Ibiza. Getting up early (German programming, we can't help it), far too much breakfast food (fresh juice, fruit, lovely Spanish hazelnuts and my own personal chef to make me pancakes and omelettes). Snorkelling - playing with an octopus and hermit crabs, finding little treasures like a dead sea urchin and shiny sea shells. Diving through caverns. Nursing a bad sunburn. Reading the new Hank Green novel on the hotel veranda (it's such a good book again). A dip in the luke-warm pool once in a while. Cooling down in our room. Heading out for dinner. Drinking red wine. Falling asleep early.

Climbing up a hill. Watching the sunset on the cliffs with a bottle of rosé. Gorgeous.

Nightswimming (deserves a quiet night). Jumping into the pitch-black Mediterranean in our underwear after eating black paella (with squid ink). Humming the R.E.M. song accordingly.

Suddenly speaking Spanish. Well, broken Spanish, but they mostly get what I mean.

A huge glass of iced coffee after a long cycling tour. Lots of ice cubes and vanilla ice-cream. Lounging on the outside sofa. After having an outside shower. Nice.

Drinking red wine on a candlelit veranda. Playing my summer jam playlist.

Lots of animals. Watching the lizards fight each other. And the goats across the road. Cuddling with a needy cat in San Ferran. And Jaco the dog who belongs to the guitar workshop's owner.

Pizza night at the workshop. a) I love places that smell like wood and oil, places that are really lived in and you can see that people actually spend time and work there. Creative chaos. b) Damian, one of the teachers there, is man candy. Long, black hair and icy blue eyes.

The night sky over Formentera. You can actually see the Milky Way and shooting stars here.

Empty beaches. The dunes. Snorkelling. Spending time underwater has a very calming effect on me. It's like entering a different universe.

Creative projects. Flow. I was completely in my zone when I was building an octopus out of sand on the beach. Forgetting about time. Discomforts. The sun. Just digging in the sand with my bare hands. But I also played around with watercolour and chalk, made some pencil drawings, for example a still life with grapes and twigs from the garden. I developed some solar photographs, too. Experimenting is fun!

Alone time. I've been craving it so much lately. Being around 4 people all the time is incredibly exhausting for me. I'm not used to it at all.

Solving the New Yorker crossword puzzle one Friday morning.

Having Pomadas at Kiosko 62 during sunset. Really chill vibes. Getting drunk quickly. Taking selfies. The sea, the sun, some hippies. Nice.

Preparing dinner together. Singing along to the music. Feeling the effect of the sunset cocktails. It's interesting to see how much my usually so restrained friends change with a few sips of gin.

The availability of truffle products in Spain. Cheese, crisps, oil... I love it.

Talking about artists' muses with Flo - mostly Gala Dalí and Françoise Gilot.

[neverisalongtime-ja-blog]

Chapter 31: I’ll post whatever I want

Hey everyone! I’m so sorry I couldn’t upload last Thrusday, there’s too much goin on right now but here it is!! Chapter 31!

Read chapter 30

-          I missed your lip biting thing – Josh said to Anastasia while walking through a Venice square, on the way to the restaurant where a big lunch was going to be held.

-          I missed your guitarist fingers – Anastasia said back to him, a little bit flushed.

-          Are you blushing? – Josh asked laughing.

-          No, I’m not. It’s the heat – Anastasia lied. It was actually very hot outside in that city and Anastasia had to choose a light outfit, a grey flower-printed crop top with a low cleavage, a pair of baby blue jeans, grey oxfords on her feet and a grey, wide-brim fedora.

-          You look amazing, by the way – Josh said to her once again – Well, you always do. Even when dressing so sensual you have such a taste…

-          Thank you – Anastasia said – Are you adulating me because I gave you the best sex of your life last night? – Josh laughed.

-          The Anastasia I know is back. I’m adulating you because you’ve given me the best sex of my life in general – This was getting weird for Anastasia.

-          Josh… - She didn’t know if she should ask about his girlfriend. She actually didn’t want neither if it was going to break the spell. It was obvious they were together but she wanted to know if this was just a one night stand or something more. At the same time she didn’t want it to be something more, she couldn’t go through that again – Never mind.

-          No, tell me.

-          Don’t worry, we are already here – She said looking at the whole travel crew sitting at a large table in the restaurant’s balcony.

They made their way there and Anastasia had a glimpse of the place, it was beautiful. You could see the ocean from the balcony and the boats riding in the back. She chose a chair next to Barbara and in front of Mandy, while Josh sat a little bit away, next to Flea. She felt Barb and Mandy’s keen eyes, so she smiled at them with a funny grin. She then could see Mandy moving her lips to her forming the words “Fuck you”, Anastasia laughed.

Lunch was amazing, everybody there got along so well. They all had crazy conversation topics, they talked about life on tour and making music, they even talked about the old times when Anthony and Barbara were a mess, way before Anastasia moved to LA, then Anthony mentioned when An moved and everything changed for Barbara, but in a good sense and how Barbara took her to almost every concert she could. An was feeling good, so well. Better than the last months. She even stopped thinking about Josh’s girlfriend; suddenly she wasn’t worried about it anymore. She was enjoying that moment, right there without any obstacles.

After lunch everybody was up for a walk, they needed it because they all ate so much pasta. They visited the magnificent Piazza San Marco, then went to the Basilica, walked through small streets and visited some local stores and then everybody wanted to do some boat rides on the Grand Canal. But Josh had some other plans.

 -          What do you say if we skip the boat ride and go for gelato? – He asked to Anastasia almost whispering in her ear.

-          You know I’m always down for gelato – She answered smiling.

 She excused herself to the group saying she was feeling a little bit sick for a boat ride, and they both walked away from them. Then they arrived to a place called Boutique del Gelato, which was pretty famous in the city.

 -          The people at the hotel recommend it – Josh told Anastasia – And I know how much you love it, so I wanted to bring you here.

-          I want lemon and pistachio – Anastasia ordered.

-          What? That’s the weirdest mix ever! – Josh laughed.

-          Oh, I’m sure you are going to ask for something basic like chocolate and vanilla – Anastasia mocked him.

-          No… I’m going to order chocolate and… strawberry – Josh laughed and Anastasia joined him – I’m joking, I want hazelnut and Stracciatella.

-          Uh! Fancy! – Anastasia said.

-          The occasion warrants it, after all I'm with one of the fanciest people I know – He said.

-          Ok. Stop it, Josh – Anastasia said rolling her eyes.

-          And I’ll pay for it – Josh warned her – It’s your birthday weekend.

-          That makes me feel guilty – Anastasia said – I don’t like people paying for my stuff.

-          You are impossible – He said rolling his eyes but with a smile on his face.

 They ate their gelatos while walking around. Watching the city, avoiding the places with bad smell and just enjoying each other’s company. It was like the old days, even before they were a couple. She felt so good at that moment; she forgot everything he did, even if that was possible. It was the same old Josh, the one she met at Eric’s birthday party all those years ago.

At one moment she got lost with the view, the Venice canals opening to the ocean and then she heard a camera click at her back. She turned around fast and Josh was holding his phone and laughing.

 -          What are you doing? – She asked very confused.

-          Taking a picture – He said smiling like a dumbass.

-          Of me? – She asked again.

-          Well, you were on the way – He answered – But look, it’s beautiful – He showed her the photo and indeed it was a gorgeous picture. It showed her from the back looking at the horizon – Come here, let’s take a picture together.

-          Oh… that’s weird – She said smiling.

 Josh got close to her and they took a selfie with the Venetian landscape in the back.

 -          Look at you taking selfies! – Anastasia said mocking him.

-          Stop – He laughed – Gonna post this – Anastasia’s heart stopped.

-          Where? – She asked – Where are you gonna post it?

-          On Facebook, it’s the only social media I use – He said using his phone and she thought it was time to bring it up.

-          Josh, don’t! You have a girlfriend! – She had to say it. His face changed from happiness to confusion.

-          First of all, I don’t have a girlfriend – He said and that shocked Anastasia – Second, I’ll post it wherever I want to – She was about to ask “What about Lauren?” but she decided not take it further.

 The flight back served as a thinking session for Anastasia. Josh denied Lauren without hesitation, and he was acting so friendly the whole weekend, he apologized for everything he did and he looked honest doing so. They even had sex, the wine had a lot to do over there, but the next morning there wasn’t a drop of shame or regret in that hotel room. It all felt so natural, like if they were longtime friends that liked each other. Surprisingly she wasn’t even confused, she had peace in her heart, she was happy, of course… and just like that Anastasia had her hopes up again.

 -          You need to tell me everything – Mandy took a seat in front of her at Anastasia’s booth on the plane, luckily this time Josh was far from them.

-          What can I tell you? – Anastasia smiled at her friend – We had dinner and then went back to his room, we had sex, we ate gelato and then he denied the fact that he has a girlfriend.

-          What?! – Mandy couldn’t scream because the plane was so quiet – Anastasia, did you sleep with him?

-          You didn’t realize that I didn’t sleep in our room?

-          No. I was drunk and there were two bedrooms, I thought you were inside. I can’t believe this… And he denied her?

-          He said she wasn’t his girlfriend.

-          Oh my God, An! – Mandy said – I don’t want to see you suffer, please, please, please, stay strong. You don’t deserve this, you deserve a man for you alone, a man that only loves you.

-          Don’t worry about it.

-          I’ll be here in the end, as usual. That’s my mission in this planet – Mandy said checking her phone and suddenly she had a surprised expression on her face – Look!

 Mandy handled Anastasia the phone and An saw the photos Josh published on Facebook, first the one where she was alone, and then the selfie he took of them. He wrote “I wish all my trips around the world were like this” on the description box. Both friends shared a glance.

 -          He doesn’t have her as a friend on Facebook – Mandy said – I stalked him – She said before Anastasia could ask – Look, there’s more!

 A video from An’s birthday party of  her singing No Scrubs with Kelly was there too, he captioned it “Two girls who won’t take no scrubs”, a bunch of his friends left comments like “I want your life” and “I can’t believe you hang out with someone as hot as Anastasia Truman”, that one made her feel good.

 -          Why is he posting all this? – Anastasia asked.

-          No idea – Mandy said.

-          He didn’t even do this when we were a couple.

-          It’s weird indeed – Mandy said – Aw, An! Be careful, please!

-          How was your weekend? – Anastasia changed the subject violently.

-          It was amazing! – Mandy answered with light in her eyes – I had so much fun with all the food and everyone. Josh stole you, but anyway.

-          People noticed? – Anastasia was ashamed now.

-          Oh yeah. Anthony didn’t stop making jokes about it – Mandy said – I’m going to sleep a little bit, try to do the same.

-          You know I don’t sleep on planes – Anastasia said.

-          TRY! – Mandy screamed ignoring the rest of the people that were actually sleeping.

 Anastasia was confused now; this wasn’t a normal attitude on Josh. She got up from her seat and tried to look out for Josh. She saw him at her right, he was awake and she could see the reflective light on his face from his notebook. She walked towards him, he took his headphones off and smiled at her, then moved to make some room so she could sit next to him.

 -          Don’t you think those Facebook posts are going to get you in trouble? – Anastasia asked.

-          I already told you that no – Josh answered rolling his eyes – They are great pictures and the world should see them.

-          And that video.

-          That video was hilarious – He said laughing – If it is such a big deal for you I’ll take them down.

-          No! It’s fine… for real – She said – Don’t worry. It’s just that you used to be so private.

-          I still am – He answered – And I know who I have on my Facebook page just like you know who follows you on your Instagram. You used to post pictures of me and of us, and I never had a problem with it. By the way, I noticed you never deleted them.

-          Why would I? It was a great moment in my life. I’m not a teenager, Josh…

 He just smiled and didn’t say anything back to that.

Back at her seat, she couldn’t help but to think about it. He wasn’t hiding her and she wasn’t sure if they were going to repeat what happened that weekend but right now she was happy, for real this time, for the first time in months, she was happy. Deep inside she knew it was a fake happiness but she didn’t mind it. All of her life she had to deal with anxiety and now she was ready to be better. Yes, Josh hurt her but also, she still had feelings for him and she could tell he still had feelings for her too. The way he made love to her the night before was filled with desire and passion. It didn’t feel like a stranger or a one night stand at all, it was two people in love giving themselves to each other.

Tour was about to start again and the future never looked so bright before her eyes.

Read chapter 32

[forkanna]

ELSANNA WEEK: AnnaPan

Modern AU/ Unrelated/Oneshot; Anna owns a very small bakery in a building that Hans’ family owns , but is being threatened to be shut down due to an increase in rent/because Hans is a dick. Elsa is a CEO that frequents the bakery and refuses to let this happen. [prompt by @pankite | FFn | AO3 | EFcom ] 

The door chime was a familiar, comforting sound to Elsa. That was the only way the owner of the bakery knew her, which was on purpose. She loved being only known as a customer… as a human. That they only knew each other by first names and a shared love of chocolate-hazelnut brioche.

So seeing the bakery was empty confused her. Where were all the customers? Usually, there were at least a few; it was a popular spot along their street, even if not having achieved citywide fame. How had she missed the “We’re open!” neon sign being off, and that most of the lights were out? Though the door being unlocked was a mystery…

Then she heard the sobs from behind the counter. She stood just at the door, momentarily indecisive, until she decided to approach the counter.

“H-hello? Is everything alright back there?”

There was a thud, sounds of items falling to the floor. A moment later, a disheveled mop of red hair emerged, flour smudged across one freckled cheek and face puffy. Her aquamarine eyes squinted for a moment, then widened.

“Elsa? What… how did you get in here?”

An apologetic shrug of one shoulder accompanied her answer. “The door wasn’t locked. I’m… sorry, I’m intruding, you’re-”

“No, no, it’s my fault,” she half-laughed, half-sobbed. “Forgot to lock it when I closed up. Sorry. I, um… c-can I get you anything? We have some leftover goods, it’s…” Wiping her eyes, she reached for a pair of rubber gloves to handle what bread they had left for her.

“Hey.” Laying a hand on the counter, privately wishing it wasn’t separating the two of them, Elsa frowned across it at her and said, “You’re upset, and you’re closed. Don’t worry about my standing order.”

“Oh… oh God, I forgot about that, too! I think we’re out of brioche…” But then she saw Elsa looking at her so intently. “What?”

Biting her lip for a moment, she tried to decide if this was any of her business. It wasn’t. Her lips still opened and she whispered, “What’s wrong, Anna?”

The baker laughed and tried to wipe her eyes clear more effectively than she had before. “It’s nothing. Just… life kicking my ass, like it’s always tried to kick my ass. No big. I should expect this by now, right? I’m kinda dumb for still being surprised after all these years.”

“Anna…” Then she sighed, shaking her head. “I’m sorry for prying. And for you having such a bad day. I’ll show myself out, and, um… I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“I’m not sure you will.”

The line was seemingly innocent, but Elsa felt her heart leap into her throat and lodge there. Maybe she didn’t mean anything darker by it… but if she did, she couldn’t let her anxiety over dealing with someone while they were upset get in the way of doing what was right. Steeling her resolve, she lifted the hinged countertop and rounded it to stand next to the young baker. She seemed a little surprised, but Elsa didn’t waste any time. Her hand came to rest on Anna’s shoulder.

“What do you mean? Please, I... well, maybe this is none of my business, but if it’s that bad you’re not sure you’ll be here tomorrow…”

“Huh?” Anna blinked a few times, then let out a small chuckle. “Oh… ugh, that sounds a lot worse now that you put it that way. Sorry, I totally didn’t mean to scare you!”

“Ah. Well then, what did you mean?” When Anna’s face fell again, she withdrew her hand. “S-sorry, I’m being nosy. I was just-”

“You were worried. It’s okay.” Taking a deep breath, she let it out slowly as she scrubbed at her face, smearing the flower further. “I might have to sell my shop. Try to set up somewhere else, though I don’t really have the money… I don’t know, I’m just panicking. Stupid.”

Frowning and wringing her hands, wishing she could pat Anna’s shoulder again but feeling it would be too forward, Elsa whispered, “I’m so sorry to hear that. Why? You can’t be doing poorly; I’ve seen how much your customers love your bread. Myself included.”

“They aren’t the problem. It’s that stupid Westergard jerk who owns this building; he’s raising the rent for everybody. And I live here, too, so it’s like… I can’t afford both my apartment and the storefront. So I either have to start sleeping on sacks of flour in the back, or I have to close the store.”

“And you can’t raise your prices,” Elsa murmured. When Anna’s eyebrows knitted as she looked up at the woman, she waved a hand. “Oh, they’re reasonable enough at present, but if they went much higher you’d lose customers. Lowering them to attract new customers could work, but if the rent is being hiked that much, it wouldn’t be enough to offset your rising overhead.”

There was a lot more blinking of long, luxurious eyelashes. “Wow… I, um, didn’t know you knew how to run a business, but you talk like you do.”

“Might know a thing or two, yes.” Biting her lip for a moment as she thought furiously, she tilted her head when an idea began to come to her. “How married are you to the location?”

“Very; I love it here. But if I can’t afford it, I can’t afford it; I’ll adjust.”

Nodding to herself, Elsa took out her phone and began tapping furiously. “Pretty sure you’re more attached than this Westergard is. And money talks.”

“Uh… sure. What are you doing?”

“Buying the building.”

“WHAT?!” When Elsa didn’t respond, Anna walked around to stare at the phone. Elsa was about halfway through composing an email to a contact named “Ms. Waialiki”, but she turned the phone away from Anna’s face instinctively when she saw her snooping.

“Excuse me!”

“What are you trying to- how can you buy a whole building?! That’s crazy!”

Face seemingly unimpressed, even if her pale cheeks had become the slightest bit rosier at the accusation, Elsa told her in a mild tone, “I’m making an investment. The instant I saw it was called ‘AnnaPan’ I knew you were pretty savvy.”

“What? I don’t… what are you talking about?”

“This is a neighbourhood highly concentrated with a Latina-Latino population. I was already coming here for the incredible pupusas around the corner. You aren’t Latina, but you still gave the store a Spanish-influenced name so everyone would not only instantly know it belonged to you, but that you would serve the kind of pan dulces the locals might want alongside the more European-influenced baked goods.”

Anna was literally stunned. After a few seconds, she whispered, “You… noticed all that, just from the name?”

“Your cuernos are incredible. And very authentic.”

“W-well…” Warming to the subject, Anna suddenly grinned and gushed, “I apprenticed at the Avalor Panaderia — you know, over on Fifth? They were trying to focus on teaching me white people bread, but I kept bothering them about the other confections they had for sale, all those gorgeous puerquitos and novias, and I just… soaked a lot of that up like a sponge, I guess. There’s so much more to bread than loaves and muffins!”

Elsa stayed focused on finishing her email, though she was smiling from listening to Anna. “It shows. Your challah and brioche are better than some of the actual Kosher bakeries and pâtisseries. More than anything, I think what you’ve created is unique because it’s such a multicultural celebration of what can be achieved with a little flour, sugar, and yeast. Simply stunning.”

“Investment, huh?” Anna thought that over for a few seconds, then shook her head violently. “W-wait, wait. I can’t let you do this — buying the whole building just because I’m having trouble with rent?! Come on… you barely even know me.”

“I know you’re the most accomplished and imaginative baker in the city, and that you deserve to be compensated. And I’ll still be charging you rent,” she warned with a slight smirk. “Just… no more than you were paying before now.”

“You… this… I don’t…” Flabbergasted, Anna pushed her hands into either side of her head. But she was smiling. “It’s like you’re my fairy godmother! I don’t know how to…”

Apparently, not knowing how else to react meant that Anna had to fly into Elsa’s arms, giving her a huge, showy kiss on the cheek as she hopped up and down with glee. Elsa dropped her phone to clutch her back, feeling her face growing hot from the sudden display of affection.

“Thank you SO MUCH! I can’t believe this! You can have all the free brioche you want for the rest of your life!”

Sputtering like mad, Elsa finally managed to tell her, “Th-that’s not necessary! Just… keep doing what you do!” But she couldn’t help grinning like an idiot. Secretly, she had always hoped she could make Anna as happy as her bread did for her. Having that chance was worth every penny.

[travelonlinetips-blog]

New Post has been published on https://travelonlinetips.com/12-of-queenslands-best-restaurants-that-will-blow-your-mind/

12 of Queensland's best restaurants that will blow your mind

There are good restaurants, and then there are the restaurants worth flying for.

Ones that make you dream of certain dishes for years to come. Ones with a three-month waiting list for a Saturday night booking. And the ones under the helm of Australia’s most exciting and innovate chefs.

If you’re a bona fide foodie on a mission to try all of the best restaurants in Queensland and all they have to offer, this list is for you.

The Fish House, Burleigh Heads, Gold Coast

There’s a good reason why we’ve espoused the virtues of The Fish House before. And the twice-daily delivery of fresh fish, enviable Burleigh Heads location, and sophisticated wine list are just a few of the reasons why it was again awarded a chefs hat in the 2019 Australian Good Food Guide.

For the best chance of menu sampling, order the Chef’s Selection ($110 per person), which may see you slurping live dry opened Sydney Rock Oysters, supping simple lemony fish soup, spooning prawn bisque risotto and signing off with Patagonian Toothfish.

Rick Shores, Burleigh Heads, Gold Coast

Named as one of the best dining experiences in the country by The Australian Financial Review‘s 2018 Top 100 Restaurant awards, Rick Shores is so close to the water it’s literally lapped by the waves.

But with a culinary team drawn from the kitchens of some of Australia’s top South-East Asian restaurants (Spirit House, LONgTIME, Longrain), the food here almost outshines the view.

Take your time with the menu and enjoy inventive bar snacks like ‘Ricks’ fried bug roll, with gem lettuce and sriracha, through to fried shrimp wonton with smoked ham broth and pork floss.

Urbane, Brisbane

Crowned as one of the Top 100 restaurants in Australia by both Gourmet Traveller and Gault&Millau’s 2018 awards, chic dining darling Urbane has long been one of Brisbane‘s best-kept secrets.

It’s an interesting formula for success: open only three nights per week, a vegan chef, and degustation-only menu. But, oh how it works.

The five or seven-course omnivore or herbivore menus take diners on a journey from the interesting (yellow peach and lobster consommé) to the intriguing (poached fennel on brioche with nori and miso butter) with ingredients changing depending on seasonal availability.

Gauge, South Brisbane

Well before the accolades – including this year’s chefs hat in the Australian Good Food Guide – we knew Gauge was something special.

Though it looks more cafe than fine dining establishment, the food being lovingly plated up at the sister venue of Teneriffe’s hip Sourced Grocer and South Brisbane bar Maker is nothing but five star.

Ordering off the dinner menu will have you sampling the daring raw lamb with shiitake and flying fish roe, or keeping things amusingly sweet with cherry sorbet, caramelised cream, nutmeg, and artichoke.

Otto Ristorante, Brisbane

Awarded two chefs hats and Wine List of the Year in the 2019 Australian Good Food Guide, Otto Ristorante is the first Queensland locale for the company behind Sydney’s renowned Quay and Bennelong restaurants. Which means to say that it’s good. Very good.

Overlooking Brisbane‘s Story Bridge, the Southern Italian menu has been designed with the Queensland climate in mind and executes all your favourites: oysters with lemon and black pepper granita, Villani Culatello with balsamic watermelon, and house-made pasta with finesse.

Gerard’s Bistro, Brisbane

Tucked in a lane off Fortitude Valley’s James Street, Gerard’s Bistro has all the right ingredients for a memorable night out.

Named the Top Restaurant in Queensland in The Australian Financial Review‘s 2018 Top 100 Restaurant awards, you’ll find yourself on a culinary journey through the Maghreb and Middle East, with perfectly paired wines taking flavours to the next level.

The generous menu stretches from confit southern squid with roasted bone sauce, hazelnut tarator and grilled enoki mushroom; through to nitro sahlab with carob ice cream, blackberries, blood plum and pistachio.

Stokehouse Q, South Bank, Brisbane

Taking home two chefs hats in the 2019 Australian Good Food Guide, Stokehouse Q is another southerner migrated north, perched pretty on the banks of the Brisbane River at South Bank‘s River Quay precinct.

Inspired by the Mediterranean, the menu here showcases the best in local produce – with miso-glazed barramundi belly, seaweed dashi and Davidson’s plum oil.

Drink in the view and a long, lazy afternoon over the likes of market fish, white soy cucumber, fermented macadamia cream; saltbush & labne dumplings, silken tofu, dried lime XO; leaving room for vanilla semifreddo, rosella sorbet and dark chocolate mousse

The Long Apron, Montville, Sunshine Coast

Hotel restaurants don’t always hit the mark, but The Long Apron at Spicers Clovelly Estate is not your average hotel restaurant.

When the hotel is actually a boutique homestead in the gorgeous Sunshine Coast Hinterland, and the restaurant is the type of place you’d book months in advance for that special occasion lunch or dinner, when the two combine, it’s magical.

Head chef Chris Hagan takes his inspiration from around the world, and being classically trained, he has a skill for clean precise dishes with an excellent balance of flavour and elegant presentation.

Wasabi, Noosa, Sunshine Coast

When you feel like taking a trip to Japan for the evening, but want to feel the tatami under your feet with views of the Noosa River at the same time, Wasabi knows how to deliver on all accounts.

Awarded two chefs hats in the 2019 Australian Good Food Guide, the most outstanding achievement here, however, is the hyper-local sourcing of ingredients. Namely from the restaurant’s own farm where rare Japanese ingredients are grown and composted, and the highlighting of lesser-known local seafood takes place.

Trust us and hand over the reins for the omakase seven or nine-course menu – aka let the chef decide.

Sum Yung Guys, Sunshine Beach, Sunshine Coast

The name sums it up: four mates, a passion for pan-Asian cuisine, all just a stone’s throw from one of the most beautiful beaches on the Sunshine Coast.

The heat since opening Sum Yung Guys in 2017 by local resident (and Masterchef fave) Matt Sinclair and friends doesn’t appear to be slowing down, either: it was named one of the 50 hottest restaurants by The Australian and top 100 restaurants in the country by The Australian Financial Review in 2018.

Here, nothing has been left untouched by creativity, from their funky neon signage and street murals adorning the walls, to their share-style menu featuring zesty delights like Hiramasa kingfish, green scud and laksa; and wok-tossed mussels with lemongrass, ginger and coconut water.

Indulge Cafe, Bundaberg

There’s a simple ethos at Indulge Cafe in Bundaberg: “We know where it came from and how it was made”.

True to form, their undeniably outstanding use of fresh, local produce and giving the growers the kudos they deserve, has won not only our bellies over but a number of well-deserved accolades.

Open for breakfast and lunch, every dish has a story here and the owners of Indulge are more than happy to share.

Nu Nu, Palm Cove, Tropical North Queensland

If you want to know what Tropical North Queensland tastes like on a plate, make a beeline for chef Nick Holloway’s Nu Nu (you may have seen him on MasterChef in 2015).

Nestled nicely on the paperbark tree-lined esplanade of Palm Cove, with cracking views out over the Coral Sea and Double Island, this is fine dining with its tie not only loosened, but left at the back of the wardrobe.

A four or seven-course tasting menu is available and is perfect for those who can’t possibly choose between cinnamon roast Victorian lamb with caramelised Mungalli yoghurt and pumpkin custard; and wok-fried north Queensland mud crab with chilli tamarind, sweet pork, market greens, jasmine rice and ginger broth. (You understand the dilemma, no?)

What’s your favourite restaurant in Queensland?

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