#9 in fact bc it was done in February
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[Cringetober #13] Creepypasta + [Inktober #13] Rise
My old ass Creepypasta oc, [reads notes] Crepy girl. Yes, with one e. Like crepĂŠ. She's showing Sally her fave album đđ
#my art#artists on tumblr#doodles#oc art#my ocs#oc crepy girl#sally williams#creepypasta#cringetober#inktober#i made crepy girl when i was like. 10.#im currently waiting for my pc to load so i can say her og creation date ^_^#yeah she was created on 2014 so i was uh#YEAH I NAILED IT I WAS 10#9 in fact bc it was done in February#which means CG is 9 yo making this friendship pair up perfect#and yeah she's stimming Hard<333
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5, 15, 16, 29
hi!! thanks for your ask!! :3
(the list)
5. What work of yours got more feedback than you expected?
so on the one hand, my danny phantom fics always get a lot of attention and it always leaves me a little surprised, but on the other hand, that fandom is very fic focused, so at the same time it Doesn't really surprise me when i get a lot of kudos for them. what surprises me more is how much other fandoms DON'T comment or bookmark or follow fics lol. i was seriously spoiled with those lol
as for a fic that's gotten more feedback, uhhhh hm. a couple of my dp fics have done better than i thought they would, yeah, but i also have this bleach fic that's in second person that seems to have come across really well, so i guess that one's the most surprising lol
aftershocks has done really well, but that's not surprising considering the talent that went into it, the fact we updated every week, and the word count, but it still baffled me as we were updating it how well it was doing lol
15. What WIP are you taking into next year with you?
definitely my rottmnt separated au (chapter 1 is posted on ao3 as sunset hues, jetpack blues (SHJB)) lol. ive been putting a lot of effort into it, more than i give most of my fics, tho i'm realizing now as i'm working more on planning i may have jumped the gun a bit and posted it a biiit early?? but also i wanted to post it on my birthday so i'm not so concerned about that kdshbfhdsf
when i post chapter 2 (which is basically done except for the final revision i need to give it), i'm gonna reread chapter 1 as well and make sure it's up to date with the minor stuff i left out bc i hadn't nailed down some specifics yet (but dw, it'll be Very minor and won't effect the plot lol)
besides that, i have oneshot prompts i wanna fill out and i have a fic in the works i'm calling Fallout, which is inspired by fall out boy songs (which ive been thinking about since like february/march when "love from the other side" dropped lol)
i also lowkey wanna try to get a fic done for danny phantom's 20th anniversary in april but idk how that's gonna go lol. i'm still very focused on ninja turtles
16. Whatâs your most common âAdditional Tagsâ tag?
of my 54 works on ao3 Fluff seems to be my most used tag with 10 times, which is. lowkey a surprise LOL. Hurt/Comfort comes in second with 7 (tied with "not beta read" and a tag for a danny phantom fic event) and Angst is in third with 6 (barring the two that i'm not counting lol)
going by just my rise fics, first place tag goes to Donatello and Leonardo are Twins (TMNT) with 6 of my 8 fics (ao3 says 9, but one of them is aftershocks, which i won't include bc it's a collab) and only reason it's not all 8 is bc i didn't tag it in fics where it's not a main focus lol
29. Favorite line/passage you wrote this year?
hmmmm let's see.... okay what have i written this year....
oh god that's a lot more than i thought, uhhhh
i have a lot of stuff i Really enjoyed tbh. there's a fun little action sequence i wrote for a later part of SHJB that i liked (that i'll prolly have to rework a little), there's a few Other parts of my prewritten SHJB stuff i enjoy, there's a bunch of stuff in my rise august fills i really liked...
but i think for a single line/passage, i'll go with this bit from the beginning of my fic what's in a name? (which is also posted here on tumblr!!)
Donnie, not bothering to look up from his phone, flaps a hand in the air dismissively. âI keep all my anger bottled up in here,â he taps his chest, âand hope one day it will just kill me. Like a normal person,â he adds, as if what he just described is unequivocally a universal experience.
this entire piece was a lot of fun to write and there's some more silly lines in this i really enjoyed but i think this is the one i think about the most, like the exchange directly after this lol
Leo purses his lips and steeples his hands, holding this fingers to his mouth. âSo thatâs a yes to the mad, then.â âOr it could be, like, the coo-coo for cocoa puffs type of mad!â Mikey chimes in, crossing his eyes and swirling a finger beside his ear. âYâknow, like British people say.â âEw,â Leo says, because thatâs all that needs to be said about that.
and this line a little bit down from that
Raphâs next exhale is heavy, the burden of Atlas in his eternal torment. âPizza Supreme, I wish.â
thanks again for your ask!!! these were a lot of fun to answer. i love talking about my writing dfjghbdfg get me started and i'll never shut up lol
#thanks for the ask!#sometimes i like talking about writing more than i like actually writing#it's a lot of work and my focus and motivation don't always let me write much#but GOd am i excited for my sep au#it's taking a lot of work#and a lot of research#but i want it to be the best that it can be#at least some of this research is really interesting tho :0#like this fic has me going insane and making a million notes#i even made little flashcards for the episodes so i could physically see where they might fit the timeline lol#ask#answer#and since they were all mentioned#rottmnt#danny phantom#bleach#aftershocks#i think i have this tagged???#if not oh well lol#i do now
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now that iâm back in the high chance of getting hospitalized again i really wonder what ppl find so appealing abt it like itâs literally life and death for if i go w/in the next 9 weeks i donât feel like i won some sort of âsick enoughâ prize in fact i feel awful iâll have to miss school and my friends and family and possibly work (which i love) if i canât finish classes in time before the start of february, and my semester was supposed to end in early december. âgrippy socks vacationâ where. like in general the glamorization of being sick from mental illness i donât feel quirky or edgy or poetic at all just guilty and tired bc so many times in my life i thought iâd be done w this by now
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Demo Link + About the potential ROs of âNevermooreâ (With Art!)
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Game Demo | ForumÂ
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I decided to put all semi-relevant info + commissioned artwork in one post so itâs easy to find for any newcomers. Iâll be pining this too. (Though some info might change slightly over time bc I am guilty of being inconsistent with my characters whoops)Â
For RO info, I had also included their music themes. It was based on an ask I gotten a long time ago, but instead on separating them from âcharacter songsâ and âromance path balladsâ, theyâre just in general now (But you can still interpret them however you want) Also thereâs now an extra song for each because I canât help myself haha. (And one more thing...a lot of songs are english covers of anime music because I am a weeb. Just...putting it out there)
Also, the some of songs themselves could reveal a bit of the ROs backstory/motivations/etc, if you know where to look đ.
Disclaimer: All art is done (commissioned) by the incredible @apexredâ! Please check them out when you can! And even though the ROs have their âofficial artâ, please donât be discouraged if you had wanted to imagine them looking a little different when their descriptions eventually show up in the demo! These designs are more for myself than anything đ
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Under the cut-
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Micah/Miriam Sterling
They come from the back alleys of early 1900s New York with a soft-spoken and patient personality. Generally civil and polite to most people they meet, and tries to avoid conflict as much as possible. They also have a habit of being constantly alert of their surroundings, picking up sounds and sensations that would normally be missed by others. Nobody considers it unusual, however, because it becomes understandable once you meet them. If the pair of shades and solid wood walking cane doesnât give it away, then their clouded blue eyes definitely will.
However, itâs best to remain wary of them. Because there is just something...off, in the way they carry themselves. Like a predator, waiting for the perfect opportunity to strike their prey.
Age: 26
Birthday: February 25, 1896 (Pisces)Â
Height: 5â˛9âł. Becomes 5â˛10âł in the heels.
Background:Â They actually donât know the specific date they were born, but had went with February 25 because that was the day they were found left on the doorstep of a church orphanage. Because of this, they also donât know where they are from. But they do know how to speak other languages like French, German, Italian, Russian, and many more.
Recorded Date of Disappearance: 1922
Songs: Unravel English Cover Acoustic, Last StarDust English Cover, Towards the SunÂ
Related Art: 1,
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Elias/Eloise Lain Romero
They grew up in Cuba before moving to Canada to study journalism. They are often sarcastic and have a bit of a sharp tongue, directing it towards anyone thatâs within their vicinity for longer than a minute. However, itâs known that they do genuinely care for the other residents, even though theyâd probably rather die again than admit it out loud. Oddly enough, they can also come off as rather nosy, always asking others (including you) rather personal questions. They insist that itâs important, but don't specify what they need the information for. Â
Also, they are always seen carrying a leather-bound notebook with them at all times. With everything they seem to know about the people and the town, who knows what's written in it...
Age: 21
Birthday:Â May 11, 1969 (Taurus)
Height: 5â˛7âł
Background: Was born and lived in Cuba until they were about age 7. Knows how to speak Spanish.
Recorded Date of Disappearance: 1989
Songs: Hello World English Cover, Shikisai English Cover, Reason Living English Cover
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Pavel/Pris(Priscilla) Falken
The brightly coloured, mismatched clothes they wear match their upbeat, free-spirited personality. An aspiring cook, specifically a baker, who was looking to open their own cafe before they arrived to the town. But even so, they wonât let the curse stop them from doing what they love, despite the potential risks (In fact, theyâve lost count on how many times their oven blew up on them). They also love to chat with people, especially with the newcomers. Expect to see them show up at your doorstep with a fresh batch of freshly baked goods as a way to make you feel welcome.
Their family actually shares their love for cooking, having once owned a small, local restaurant. Once is the keyword here. And itâs their fault.
Age: 23Â
Birthday:Â August 7, 1981 (Leo)
Height: 5â˛4âł-5â˛5âł
Background:Â Mixed Scandinavian ancestry and probably had distant viking blood. Knows mostly English, but may or may not know some curse words in Swedish and Norwegian.Â
Recorded Date of Disappearance:Â 2004
Songs:Â Best Day of My Life, When Can I see You Again, Glad You Came
Related Art: 1,
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Simon/Sarai Zhang
They are a person of science, following the footsteps of their father. Can be mostly be found in the town library, preferring the company of books rather than people. Their stoicism and aloofness makes it hard to get a read on what they are really thinking, and their bluntness sometimes turns others away. But they are hardworking, and take their situation more seriously than others. Which is why they are the only one who is actively trying to find a way out of the town, as well as understand how it works. Theyâve tried everything, and are still coming up with new ways and theories (and experiments, sometimes even on themselves) all the time. They are determined to escape.
They have to. For their father.Â
Age: 25
Birthday:Â November 12, 1945
Height: Simon is 6â˛2âł, while Sarai is 6â˛0âł
Background: Has a Chinese father and an Israeli mother. So because of this they know how to speak Mandarin and little bit of Hebrew.
Recorded Date of Disappearance:Â 1970
Songs:Â Câmon, Tell Me Now English Cover, [To be added]
#astericae speaks#Nevermoore cog#ROs#Nevermoore Sterling#Nevermoore Romero#Nevermoore Falken#Nevermoore Zhang
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unedited sneak peek for the upcoming chapter of seattle: become human bc itâs valentineâs day so why not?? :)
February 14th 2039, 8:36 pm
When Levi opened the door to their house, all he wanted to do was to take a shower and then sleep. Did going to sleep at 9 pm on Valentineâs day make him sound boring? Maybe. Maybe a little bit. But he just got off a 24-hour shift, including a 16-hour surgery with Dr. Kepner and at this point he didn't care what the universe or his housemates would think of him. He was just exhausted and wanted to get some rest. Â
Already imagining himself naked in the shower, closed eyes and hot water burning his skin, he kicked off his shoes and hung up his coat. Oh yes, with each step he took towards the bathroom, he could already smell that expensive sandalwood shower gel that Casey had gotten him as his Secret Santa last year.
He stopped, however, when he passed the kitchen, an unfamiliar, but definitely pleasantly smell catching his attention. He took a little detour and found Nico behind the kitchen counter, tossing the contents in a wok that Levi had never seen before, looking like a real professional. Nico always looked like he knew how to do things, even when he never tried them before.
With anyone else, it would have annoyed Levi, but with Nico... With Nico it was different.
Perfection was in his programming. He was manufactured to be a perfect surgeon. And he was able to learn almost anything within a few tries. Â
Maybe thatâs why he liked watercolors so much. He didnât immediately conjure up a perfect painting. In fact, it took him weeks to produce something that he was somewhat satisfied with. Levi thought everything he did was perfect in a way. Even his first tries. They made him more...
Less like a machine. An actual...being. A being with flaws and imperfections. Â
Levi had learned that Nico liked having a challenge. He liked having to really try to do something and to improve himself. Maybe not being perfect was his way of separating himself from his programming. To prove that he was someone who still had to learn. Who still could learn.
Upon closing in on his housemate, Levi began to recognize the wok. Caseyâs mom had given it to him ages ago when he moved out first while being in pre-med. He had used it maybe once or twice before. It eventually landed in the furthest corner of the cabinets of the kitchen island. It originally wasnât really a kitchen island. They had this one cabinet that Dahlia brought in and then decided to place a countertop onto it. A few bar stools later, they had a place to eat at or to just stare at the designated cook of the night. That was, if they didnât just prepare something together.
Cooking together was a whole other story though. A story that wasnât told often in this house due to recurring arguments.
Sitting down on one of the bar stools, Levi watched Nico move around, stirring the wok and checking the pot that Levi previously missed to notice.
âDo I have enough time to take a shower, or are you almost done?â Levi didnât want to have him wait for too long, but he was definitely feeling very grimy from work today. And while Nico probably wouldnât be bothered by it, Levi didnât want Nico to associate him with the scent of sweat.
âGo ahead, itâll take at least 15 minutes. So donât rush,â Nico said, his hand sending him off before he turned around again to stir the wok.
When the smell of sandalwood surrounded him, Levi leaned against the wall and closed his eyes. He welcomed the hot water hitting his skin, washing away the sweat and stress of the day. He loved being a surgeon, saving peopleâs lives and all that. But it sure as hell was exhausting and had him longing for his bed 90 percent of his existence outside the hospital. That longing got more bearable though as soon as he was surrounded by his friends and furry children.
Levi smiled softly at the thought. He was really lucky to have found them. And he wouldnât change a thing even if it could cancel out his tiredness.
He turned off the water, immediately missing its heat on his body. He reminded himself that better things were waiting for him downstairs as he stepped out of the shower onto the bath mat. He wiped the steam from the mirror above the sink to look at his reflection.
He knew he didnât have enough time to make himself look truly dashing, but Nico was cooking for him and he didnât just want to show up in his pajamas. So he dried his hair as best as possible with a towel and put on a nice shirt and jeans. He tried to do something with his hair, but it just ended up being his usual curly mess. Maybe he could play it off as part of his charm.
Maybe.
Itâs not like he was going on a date or anything. It was just dinner. That Nico cooked. Nothing new or special. Absolutely not. It might be the day of commercial love, but that didnât have to make it a date. Just because it was only them and Nico cooked something that smelled delicious while looking good, just like he always did.
When Levi entered the kitchen, it was dark inside. He looked around and found the food as well as Nico missing. Normally if Nico cooked, theyâd sit at the kitchen island with Levi chomping down the dish and Nico drinking a cup of thirium. Theyâd talk about their day, plans for the weekend or just enjoyed the silent company of the other. Silence between them was never awkward.
Leviâs next stop was the living room. And sure enough, the smell of food got stronger with every step he took. Just on cue his stomach was growling loudly, reminding him that the last time he ate anything was right before the surgery had started.
All of that rumble was forgotten about though as soon as he stepped into the living room. Nico was sitting on the couch, Kali crawling onto his lap, Sprinkles next to them, licking his fur as if Nico had told him to spruce up. The only light in the room came from the fireplace and the fairy lights that Dahlia had installed throughout the room pre-Christmas. Â
Slowly, Levi approached the couch, marveling at how cozy it all looked and how Nico looked like he just belonged here. Here and nowhere else. And Levi belonged here too. They both were absolutely and one hundred percent meant to be here. Together. Levi could feel it with every fiber of his being. And it was in that moment that he knew that whatever the future might hold for them, he would do absolutely anything to make sure that the man in front of him was safe. That he could be and do anything he wanted without ever having to be afraid.
âOh.â Nico turned his head to look at Levi when he touched his right shoulder, hand gliding over to his left as he sat down next to him.
âIt looks wonderful,â Levi whispered, feeling Nico wrap his arm around him.
âYou do too.â Levi closed his eyes and tried to hide the grin that accompanied the heat that rose to his cheeks. Sometimes he forgot how smooth Nico could be if he wanted.
He opened his eyes again to say something, but all that came out of his mouth was a helpless âI ââ
âDinner is getting cold,â Nico noted with a smile, fingers tapping Leviâs upper arm, sending shivers down his spine. If it wasnât for the food in front of him that Nico had spent his time on, Levi couldâve just stayed like this for the rest of the night, begging stomach completely ignored.
#schmico#schmico fic#nico kim#levi schmitt#valentine's day#hello this is a lil update to proof i am still working on it!!#it's not all of the scene but i haven't written it all yet and i thought this was a nice cute for now :)
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čŞçćĽăăă§ă¨ă!! (part 2)
a continuation of collab w @polar-starsâ
10:30 AM EST, February 14th
âHow does one art?â asked the tenchou with a depressed groan.
Lea glanced over at the tenchouâs screen. Thirty-three shots of espresso and half a latte macchiato later, they were done writing the fic and the tenchou was now staring down what vaguely resembled a chaotic slew of random lines and squiggles.
âAre you doing abstract art?â Lea asked curiously.
Reina gave her a look. âThis is just the first layer.â
It took all her self control and then some not to laugh, but Lea managed to clear her throat and resume working on her masterpiece.
âI need a break,â the tenchou announced. âIâm going to buy food. Do you want anything?â
Lea shook her head. âI had breakfast on the plane. Thanks for putting me in business class, by the way.â
âOf course! I have a shit ton of mileage.â
It was no surprise when the store manager returned bearing five shots of espresso. âIâm setting a deadline,â Reina explained when Lea raised a concerned eyebrow. âIâll be done with the art before I finish the coffee.â
âI thought you were getting food?â
Reina waved it off and sat down. âBrain food.â She cracked her knuckles and rolled her neck. âCrunch time.â
Intrigued at the sudden life in the tenchouâs eyes, Lea gave a smirk. âSee you on the flip side.â
under the cut :}
4:00 PM EST, February 14th
âHow does⌠one⌠gradient?âÂ
It had been approximately five and a half hours of radio silence between the two in the cafe. The New York afternoon was flitting by but neither registered the time nor the passersby making the most of their Valentineâs Day; every single one of their senses was honed in on their screens and the food (because Lea insisted that no, the tenchou could not in fact survive solely off caffeine).
âWhat program are you using?â Lea asked without looking up from Kuviraâs left eyebrow.
âI invested in Clip Studio recently. Fuck! That clears the canvas.âÂ
Lea pointed at the left dock while simultaneously contouring Kuviraâs eyelid. âThe gradient is under the brush.â
âOh! Thank you.â Reina messed around with the background gradient for what had to be at least twenty years. Then she sat back with a relieved sigh and said, âIâm done.â
Lea examined Reinaâs screen and the gradientâor rather, lack thereof.
âWhereâs the gradient?â
Reina blinked. âThat is the gradient. Jujutsu Kaisen but pastel.â
Gradient, my ass, Lea thought with a pronounced eyeroll, and the tenchou laughed as if she knew what Lea was thinking.
âMy handwriting is giving me an aneurism,â she continued, âand I seriously donât know what Akane is sitting on, but it is how it is. Are you done yet?â
âJust about,â Lea said, adding final touches to Baatarâs glasses. âShould I call the birthday girl now?â
The tenchou nodded and saved the Krita fileâto lose progress now would be tragic indeed. âTell her to be here tomorrow morning at nine and ask her what her favorite coffee is. Iâll get the fic printed in 52 point font when I go back to Jyard tonight. Care to get dinner?â
For what mustâve been the first time since theyâd sat down that morning, Lea took the opportunity to absorb how gorgeous New York City actually was, the sunset an idyllic canvas streaked with pastels. âHave we seriously been sitting in this cafe for six hours? Do you even know how many couples shouldâve been enjoying the cityscape from this table?â
Reina shrugged and Lea wondered if she should admire or chastise how emotionally dead the tenchou was. âYouâre my interim Valentineâs date. Let them deal with it.â
[ok ok listen i have no clue what kind of restaurants are in nyc so weâre just ~casually~ skipping that scene]
9:00 AM EST, February 15th
The birthday girl had just sat down in the otherwise empty cafe when a waitress approached her. [also do wait staff approach you in cafes or are you supposed to order of your own volition bc i have 0 memory of pre covid]
âOne cappuccino, please,â she requested, and she swore she saw a flicker of recognition in the waitressâ eyes.
In a few minutes the waitress returned with the cappuccino⌠and a latte macchiato and ten iced americanos.
The birthday girlâs eyes bugged out. âUm⌠I donât think this is the right order?â
âItâs the right order,â said the conservatory student with a knowing grin.
Just as the birthday girl opened her mouth to courteously question just what kind of caffeine-addicted dumbass one would have to be to drink a dozen coffees in one sitting, Lea appeared out of nowhere and added, âIt is most definitely the right order.â
âNah,â corrected the tenchou. âThere were supposed to be twelve of mine but Lea made me cut two.â And then they dumped all seventy-two pages of heavyweight paper on the birthday girl lmao ok yeah that is not good for the environment but hey itâs yo birthday! hope your 2021 is completely crammed with joy and fortune and lots of good food. you are an amazing writer and human being with some litass electromagnetic oscillations, so keep living life as always :}
#next time i will use hex codes instead of guessing colors#and hopefully your posture isn't as bad as raiden's#happy birthday lol
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july 21
hello. july 21 is a special day for me and you dont have to read this because its just me venting out my thoughts and emotions as long as i can without word/character limits on any platform.
july 21 is my maternal grandmotherâs birthday. when i was born, my mom went abroad often and my dad had the regular 9 to 5 job plus extra hours for commute. so growing up with my sisters who are 5 and 7 years older, our grandparents and aunts took care of us.
im also more fond of my maternal grandmother since my paternal grandmother lived far away and we rarely ever get to see her (usually only during summers and once she stayed with us for awhile) until she passed away from Alzheimer's.
during the long hiatus i took early this year (late december to mid-march?), a lot has happened in my life. my health was put at risk because of the ash fall brought by the volcano eruption (january 12); i had allergies for weeks - i couldnt breathe properly, let alone sleep because of it. it was about to be the second year after graduating college and i have yet to get a job; the pressure from my family - and myself - was so unbearable that i caught myself slipping back to my very, very, very dark thoughts. and the worst thing that happened in those three months: my grandmother passed away. in filipino, grandmother is lola (loh-lah) and iâd like to use that for the rest of this post.
if you ask anyone in their neighborhood, any of our family friends, and relatives, everyone will tell you that her death was sudden. because everyone knows her as the sometimes-funny-sometimes-cranky old lady that owns the convenience store at the corner of the street. she was 96. she was 96 but she refused to get a wheelchair or use a walking stick even though her knees started to hurt after a few steps. she was 96 but didnât need glasses to read most of the time. she was 96 but didnât have any maintenance medication. ever since she reached her 90â˛s, she had gone to the town clinic at least twice because she fell over (from loss of balance) and busted her head. yet she would walk the next day like she doesnt have stitches on her scalp. she hated going to the doctor, sheâd always claim that nothing hurts and the only thing she wanted the doctor to fix was her hearing (its as weak as how her eyesight is clear)
i wasnt the only one in the family that got severely affected by the ash fall. my lola also had trouble breathing because of it. she also went to the doctor for it and they only prescribed her antibiotics. please remember this info. this should be around early february
she got a little better but her voice was very hoarse from the phlegm. even before this, lola had little to no appetite and would only eat when someone else is eating (usually if itâs us, her granddaughters). and by little to no appetite, i mean her whole meal would be three spoonfuls of rice and one piece/chunk of whatever the main dish/ulam is. whenever we ask if she had eaten (even though we know she hadnt) sheâd always claim that she already has (this eventually became a little joke in our family.) we took this sign as her dementia getting worse (although she was never really diagnosed with it, we had naturally assumed it because she would always repeatedly tell us stories that she insists happened even though some have been debunked and there were times she forgets our names if we havent visited in a while.)
after she gets better from the cough (idk the real diagnosis of it), her legs started to swell and because her routine had been reduced to being bedridden for most of the day, my aunts thought it was just poor circulation. it took two weeks before they brought her back to the town clinic and again, they just prescribed her with some medicine. everything after this is blurry to me until feb 21
my mom, being the eldest, made the decision to bring lola to the hospital. sheâs, rightfully, unsatisfied with the town doctorâs diagnosis and prescriptions because lola is in so much pain and her legs were still swollen and its been weeks. i was with her in the emergency room while my mom and aunt did the paper work and the staff ran tests on lola. iâm contacting my sister who was in singapore and weâd video call to entertain lola since she was very adamant - and vocal - that she did not want to be admitted to the hospital bc she was âfine.â goSh she made so many hospital staff laugh because she would always announce whenever she had to fart. after like 2 hours, we move her into a ward and my mom tells me that iâll have to stay overnight to watch over her. i was very apprehensive of this idea. i honestly did not want to. seeing her in pain was bad enough, but the fact we were in a room with other people and she was crying out loud made me really anxious but it was final. my mom, aunt, and uncle all went back home just to have dinner and theyâll come back since lolaâs doctor would be coming by to give the results and for that hour they were gone? i lost it.
lola started talking/praying out loud, asking god why she was in so much pain, asking what she had done to deserve this; and i didnât know what to do but hold her hand and kiss her head. i couldnât even show her i was crying. when my mom got back, i told her i cant do it and she eventually convinced my other sister to join me, who cancelled her plans for the next day. that night, i did not and could not fall asleep. after a few hours, her doctor finally came by and dropped a bomb on us. he was kind enough to talk to my mom and aunt behind the curtains in the softest voice ever while i helped the nurse with lola, but i could hear him crystal clear.
cancer of the liver.Â
they even momentarily walked back to lola to touch her stomach and stepped back out. i almost thought i misheard, but my mom and auntâs expressions were too grim that it basically confirmed it. later on, my mom finally told me and explained that the antibiotics she had been taking weeks ago were too strong for her because of her lifestyle and diet. there were tumors in her liver and surgery wouldnât do anything. i dont remember what i did aside from sketching on the journal i brought, but until i got home at 10am the next day, i did not sleep a wink.
feb 22. when i woke up at 2PM, i was told that they had lola discharged from the hospital. there was nothing we could do but try to ease the pain to the best of our abilities and wait. starting that day, i went over to lolaâs house to help out with feeding her, giving her medicine, and just trying to keep her happy by randomly smiling at her when i see her looking around or dancing to no music.
feb 24. these were the early weeks of covid - ph hadnât had a case yet, i believe, but travel restrictions were being implemented. my sister in singapore was doing everything to make sure she could come home because we donât know when, but we know lola was leaving soon. of all the things our mom told her not to do, she cried at the entrance of the embassy and by the grace of god, someone took pity and listened to her (bc she was denied entry since she had a small cough) and she was able book a flight at midnight and be home in 4 hours. that afternoon, when i arrived at lolaâs house, that was the very first time i stood at the doorway to greet her like i usually did and she didnât smile. not even the corners of her lips moved. she was in that much pain that she couldnât even greet me back like she always did, which was to smile and nod her head. that night, we all decided to sleepover there (with the exception of my dad since he had to feed our dogs at home). i take my usual seat in the living room and i notice a white dress that i remember (from photos) being lolaâs 50th anniversary wedding gown and without being told, i know it was what she was going to wear for the very last time.
feb 25. being notoriously a late sleeper, i was about to go to sleep at 2AM when i hear lola groaning and whining out loud. when i checked her, her stubborn lil ass was trying to get out of bed alone!!! so i obviously panic and try to wake up anyone by exclaiming that lola had to go to the bathroom - sheâs been wearing adult diapers for weeks now but refuses to go in them and is adamant about bringing her to the bathroom so she could relieve herself - so me, and the same aunt and uncle from the hospital, assisted her into this modified chair so she could pee and the only thing i could do was hold her hand, like always. after that, my uncle said heâd watch over her and lie down beside her on the bed so in case she needs to go again, he can take care of it himself. after falling asleep, i heard a few hours later that my sister from SG arrived. when i woke up later on, my sisters and i presented ourselves to lola bc its been so long since she last saw us complete, and this time she was able to give us a small nod of acknowledgement. i realized that none of my uncles and aunts went to work that day, thinking it was just so we could be complete since my sister was home. but then i overhear them making plans to have a priest come over for the sacrament of anointing of the sick - which based on my last and only experience (my grandfather/lolo), this must be the day. during the session, a few of my aunts and an uncle cried. my sisters cried, too, but i forced myself not to. when the priest left, i donât know how long, but suddenly, she was gone. i didnât know how to react. this was the second time iâve seen someone pass away before my very eyes. everyone was crying out for forgiveness, kissing lolaâs head, but i couldnât move one bit. i was finally crying, but i couldnât move at all.
3 days. from learning about the real problem with lola, it only took 3 days for it to take her away from us. not even a week, or a month. the only bright side to this was that sheâs finally relieved of all the pain thatâs been causing her suffering. 3 days of knowing her time was very, very short, but it was still a shock when she finally left.Â
for the longest time, lolaâs goal was to reach the age of 100 because apparently our government will reward her with 100,000 pesos (like 2k usd) for doing so. she wanted to reach 100 because she wanted to leave us with some inheritance haha. and everyone believed she could do it. no one doubted her. until this happened. maybe its just me, but i feel foolish... completely stupid and ignorant for knowing deep down in my heart that she would reach 100 that losing her 3 years prior her goal hurt me more than ever.Â
itâs been 5 months but remembering her death still makes me cry. i have dreams (and you all know im a lucid dreamer) where sheâs still alive and weâre talking about how she beat cancer at 96 in just a few months, but then iâll remember that she didnât and the dream in front of me just shatters and iâll wake up empty and crying. i have never felt so much regret after she passed bc all she wanted was to see me graduate and it was up to me to show her that i got my first job and give her a portion of my first salary, but i couldnât even do that. i waited too long and now its too late. her ideal type for me was a rich atenean boy who could drive đ and i still couldnât give her that bc im so anti-men. there was a time i was so scared to go back to lolaâs house bc she called me out during dinner - âbaket ka malungkot/why are you sad?â - when all i was doing was browsing through my phone, scarily enough going through another âepisodeâ, and the last person iâd ever want to know about my possible depression was her. of all my suicidal episodes, iâve always resolved them by thinking of her - that i will continue living because i wanted to see her smile. because i wanted to see her happy.
i miss her so much. i wish i had been a better granddaughter to her. the small things iâve done for her were never enough. in the past 5 months, iâve only dreamt about her twice (actually being with her) and both times made the day so hard to function. i havent moved on and i dont know if im the only one. i dont know if iâll ever move on. she would have been 97 today. whenever she forgets my name, iâll tell her i have the same birthday as her and sheâll remember me. sheâll say âahhh rosean! july 10!â
if someone read through this, im sorry you had to go through that mess. but thank you for hearing me out. no, iâll thank you the way my lola would thank people, verbatim:
thank you very much from the bottom of my heart.
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Thanks for tagging me @vanillacocacolla đš
1. What do you prefer to be called name-wise?
Vana or Silv
2. When is your birthday?
February 21st
3. Where do you live?
Germany
4. 3 things you are doing right now?
Waking up, drinking coffee & eating Baklava
5. 4 fandoms that have peeked your interest?
I don't really get too much into fandoms, I tend to get hyperfixations. But 2 are BNHA and Death Note. I also love Druck, but I just like to watch it, dunno if that already makes me part of the fandom haha.
6. How has the pandemic been treating you?
Very kindly despite it all. Even 'though it's intimidating, it's really just insecure. It actually has a heart of gold I can assure you.
7. A song you can't stop listening to right now?
Drowning by Mick Jenkins & BADBADNOTGOOD
8. Recommend a movie
A princess for Christmas đđâ¨
9. How old are you?
21
10. School, university, occupation, other?
I'm done with school, then I started an apprenticeship to become an occupational therapist, and well after 2 years I noticed it's totally not my thing at the same time my mental health got way way worse, then I had an intense mental breakdown and now I'm still trying to heal from past wounds, so that I don't ruin myself again. When I'm better I'll try to find out what actually fits to me.
11. Do you prefer heat or cold?
Neither, I don't like to freeze and I don't like to sweat. When it's hot, I miss the cold and vice versa.
12. Name one fact others may not know about you
I almost died of Sepsis when I was 7.
13. Are you shy?
No, but introverted. I come across as shy when I'm not interested in the people around me, bc I will stay quiet, but it's bc of boredom not insecurity.
14. Preferred pronouns
She/her
15. Biggest pet peeves
Hypocrites, narcissists, close-minded people, dumb people who think they're really intelligent, ignorance. It's hard there's a lot that annoys me.
16. What is your favourite "-dere" type?
Yandere. Because, I kinda get it. Who wouldn't get violent, when you're always overly sweet? You need to compensate it somehow. I mean it's not morally correct, but it's the type I mostly identify with. Probably bc I have a lot of repressed anger.
17. Rate your life from 1-10, 1 being crappy and 10 being the best it could be
It varies. But bc of my already bad mental health, I have to work on my mindset harder than others to be sth like happy, so on good days it can even reach a 7, on bad days it can go down to four, but it can't go further, bc of practiced mind-control.
18. What's your main blog?
This one
19. List your side blogs and what they're used for
Haha no. I can't, they're too intimate. 1 is for my poetry and the others are for my alter egos. But well, I can name 1 I simply dedicated to the seasons. It's demeter-despoina, but it's stuck on summer atm, bc I still haven't gotten used to autumn completely.
20. Is there something people need to know about you before becoming friends?
I have some skeletons in my closet.
I don't know who to tag, if you wanna do it, just do it, but tag me so I can look at it đđ
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1, 9, 19!!! - transkaai
1. Tell us about your current project(s) Â â whatâs it about, howâs progress, what do you love most about it?
well my most notable project rn is an original story that has about 43k words atm, and when itâs done itâll have ??? like, 70-90k probably?? itâs a novel so yeah, the first draft is probably like half or slightly more than half done
itâs basically just about,, two girls who are randomly matched as roommates in their freshman year of college, and they both kind of have their own storylines, mostly about like finding ur place and like. relating to ur parents/family .. but thereâs a twist!! (ooh) which i usually spoil when iâm giving the elevator pitch about this book but hey iâm not gonna spoil it here, u get the mystery. woo
i just love writing it!! thereâs a lot of it that makes me very soft, but also a lot of itâs heavy and emotional, and finding the balance is difficult but so rewarding. also i really just want to like. Have A Novel. To Edit. that will be really cool. once i finish it. in like 40k more words
9. Are you more of a drabble or a longfic kind of writer? Pantser or plotter? Do you wish you were the other?
for fic, i am solidly a short fic writer! my yueki oneshot is my longest one and itâs like. 2500 words LMAO but also whenever iâm writing original fic i tend to have a really big concept and then run out of steam when it comes to actually writing
which is probably related to the fact that i literally never plan a single thing -- this novel iâm working on is the only thing iâve had a solid plan on, and that plan was, like. breaking the thing up into 21 chapters and writing one (1) sentence per chapter
i honestly wouldnât want to change anything about this! i like writing without a plan, because i love it when my writing takes me somewhere i wouldnât expect. i started working on the story that would become my novel in about february and if i had set out to plan and then write a novel at that point, the story would be very very different, and would not fill out a novel at all. i had to write probably like 10-15k before i found the story i wanted to tell and the voices i wanted to do it in, and iâm so happy about what i settled on
19. Is there something you always find yourself repeating in your writing? (favourite verb, something you describe âtoo oftenâ, trope you canât get enough of?)
do wlw count? thatâs a joke but itâs also not bc all of the main characters of my novel are women and there is one (1) cishet woman. just one
i think i use the word âjustâ a lot. also âpaddedâ to describe walking, the phrase âlet out/heaved a sighâ, and â[emotion] and [emotion] all mixed up on their face/in their voiceâ to describe when someone has mixed feelings. i also use a lot of repetition, but like the specific kind of repetition (anaphora) where you repeat the beginnings of sentences for the rhythm. i like that a lot
thank you for the questions!!! sorry my answers were so long i love talking about my writing ajkfhdkjghf
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~~ 10/5/20: I removed the image of my outline; I felt like it was WAY too spoilery. Have a random dollmaker sorta picture of Cass instead bc Tumblr says âThis is a picture post and therefore must have a picture. ~~
AO3 link
Iâve been thinking about posting my outline for a few weeks now; Iâve seen people do it in the past, on rare occasion. (Iâm ok showing this to give readers a better understanding of how much I have written, my writing process, and RD's future.) I have been writing, just not the fucking next chapter (far left tab). Its about two gawdamn weeks late. Shit.Â
9: Normalâ˛s posting date is about mid-June, and that chapter isnât written either. 10: Attraction has snippets and 11: Coast has been finished since *checks* late February. (I made minor tweaks and additions since then.) [I should have waited a year and started posting in 2021. But I didnât fucking wanna.] Lessee. 13: What? is about 1/4 done. 14: Development is about 3/4 done. (14 and 17 mental note: Fix 17â˛s âRâs never been to Câs apartment on his ownâ ... but I have him there by himself in 14... This is what happens when you write out of order and donât pay attention to the facts. XD) 15: Wheels is basically done. I think 15: TTotM is about half done? Idk I added to my outline. For normal chapter length, itâs close to done. But it has about 1/3 of the content.
18: Birthday is SO FUCKING DONE. Nailed it. Has been done since early November 2019 (some minor tweaks/edits). NaNo 2019 is when I picked RD back up after ten fucking years. Also, 72 is a year later (2021) and this chapter has content. XDDDDD I LOVE 18. I wrote almost all of it in one day. It has an alternate, very explicit ending. Which yes, will be posted. đ Currently this is my favorite chapter.
Sooo... ffr, for future reference, if I ever say a chapter is done, thereâs always minor tweaks or editing that takes place. I reread my chapters all the time and go âOh, lookit that mistake!â or add in some teeny little tweak. If you ever find a typo, or even a timeline/reality mistake, PLEASE donât hesitate to shoot me an Ask or leave a comment and nicely go âHey, I found this typo here.â Or âHey, itâs winter but theyâre at the beach?â (For example. Because. Um, hopefully Iâm paying attention and wonât do that.) (Also, if anyone is up to beta/editing for meeeeeee.......)
Iâll post the rest of next part of Warmâs outline in a few days. (Weeks, lol.)
Arc 2: Between (11 mini arcs/stories) Arc 3: ------ (HEAVILY REDACTED FOR SPOILERSSS) [Like, you will never see a screenshot of this arc.] Arc 4: Cool (Leo and Donnieâs romances) Arc 5: Gold (Weddingssssss) [Too obvious for screenshots. And short. The fucking shortest arc.] Arc 6: Next Generation (Tin) Arc 7: Next Mutation (Tin) Arc 8: The End (Saaaaaad; all the major charactersâ deaths)
#TMNT#Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles#Road Diverged#RD outline#RD update comments#Warm#W update comments
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FEBRUARY 2020 DIMENSIONS ENTERTAINMENT SCHEDULES & REVIEW
Members may earn 3 points each (up to 6 points) for writing, by the end of March 7 KST:
A solo para of 400+ words based on their monthly schedule (does not count toward your monthly total).
A thread of six posts (three per participant, including the starter) based on their monthly schedule.
Threads do not have to take place directly during an important date listed on the schedule, but must be related to what the muse is mentioned to be doing in the paragraph explaining their schedule/the companyâs schedule for the month and/or their thoughts on the mentioned activities or lack thereof.
These schedules may be updated throughout the month if new information needs to be added.
Reminder: January schedule posts are due by the end of February 7 KST.
Overall Company
February is a big month for Dimensions and its employees. Starting from the beginning of the month, operations will begin moving over into the companyâs new, bigger building in Samseong-dong. By the final day of the month, all day to day operations will be officially moved into the new building. The new building is much larger than their previous one and is newly built. Thatâs not the only change this month, though. After news of their acquisition of Z Entertainment and Dimensions Soloist 3, itâs clear Dimensions is reinvesting its recent profits. Artists under the label may have heard rumors of the news in the week or two before the news was officially released through company gossip or seeing the new soloist and producers around the building.
Important dates:
February 29: Official move-in date for new building.
Dimensions Soloist 1
Her first schedule for the month is to film a Guerilla Date interview appearance where sheâll meet with fans near the Han River at night time and then talk with the host about how far sheâs come since debut, but three days later, sheâll have the opportunity to meet with even more fans for a Valentineâs day fan meeting. Sheâll perform all of her singles since âGashinaâ as well as older favorites like âBloomâ and â24 Hoursâ and get a chance to interact with fans that havenât seen her for a while. To welcome their new soloist, sheâs also encouraged to make an appearance on Dimensions Soloist 3â˛s video diary if they happen to be in the building at the same time.
Important dates:
February 11: Guerilla Date filming (to be aired: February 25).
February 14: Valentineâs Day Fan Meeting at Yes24 Live Hall in Seoul, South Korea.
Dimensions Soloist 2
While he continues recording for his upcoming comeback mini-album this month, the fan meeting in Bangkok on the twenty-second is the more important February schedule for the company, so he spends as much time in the practice studio rehearsing his performances for that as he does recording new songs, if not more. To welcome their new soloist, heâs encouraged to make an appearance on Dimensions Soloist 3â˛s video diary if they happen to be in the building at the same time.
Important dates:
February 22: Be Happy fanmeeting at GMM Live House in Bangkok, Thailand.
Dimensions Soloist 3
She didnât have much time to adjust to her new company before getting thrown into solo debut preparations, and she already began recording her her debut solo album and attending concept meetings last month, which will continue through into this month. Dimensions has asked her to keep a video diary of her solo debut preparations for them to cut together and release leading up to her debut to increase hype, and sheâs encouraged to include other Dimensions artists in some of the videos in order to naturally integrate her into the company âfamilyâ.
Important dates:
N/A
Gal.actic
Itâs comeback season! That means music shows and fan signs as usual, and the song does better than expected, peaking on the charts around the same position as âBe Ambitiousâ did (and without all the controversy!), but Gal.actic will also do a special eight hour live stream for their fans for Valentineâs Day from 2PM KST to 10PM KST. The full group will participate for an hour at the beginning and the end, but in between that, each member will get an hour on their own to entertain fans for an hour with talking, singing, cooking, or anything else that fits the format. The assigned time slots are as follows:
2PM-3PM: Full group
3PM-4PM: Leader/main vocal
4PM-5PM: Vocal
5PM-6PM: Main rapper/main dancer/vocal
6PM-7PM: Lead vocal
7PM-8PM: Lead rapper/lead dancer/vocal
8PM-9PM: Maknae/vocal
9PM-10PM: Full group
Important dates:
February 12: Release of âB.B.B.â & mini-album showcase, promotions continue until March 12.
February 14: Special Valentineâs Day livestream show.
February 16: Fan sign in Yeouido, Seoul.
February 22: Fan sign in Gangnam, Seoul.
Alien
Tour is winding down and after next month theyâll get an extended break from touring before they hold an encore concert in Seoul, but for now, they have two concerts this month before returning to Seoul, where theyâll record a new English single âWho Do U Love?â and then film the music video for it later in the month. Itâs a different sound from their recent releases in Korea, but Dimensions and Alienâs American label hope itâll be a more radio-friendly sound in the west. Theyâll do some performances for it in the spring as a part of American promotions so thereâs choreography to learn as well.
Important dates:
February 7: We Are Here tour concert at Espacos Das Americas in SĂŁo Paolo, Brazil.
February 9: We Are Here tour concert at Teatro Metropolitan in Mexico City, Mexico.Â
February 25: âWho Do U Love ft. French Montanaâ MV filming.
February 26: Release of Alligator Japanese single album.
February 29: Performance at The Fact Music Awards at Gocheok Sky Dome in Seoul, South Korea (also attending: WISH, 7ROPHY, Origin, Fuse).
MARS
Now that their concerts are finished, itâs time for the members to begin preparing for their first comeback of the year. The album will include the last two singles they released, making it a repackaged album, but theyâll need to record the new songs off of it throughout the month, including their next title track, which has a new sound from anything theyâve done before. Itâs not necessarily another cute concept, but it is more upbeat and less conceptually intense than their most popular comebacks, so itâs something new for the group to tackle.
Important dates:
N/A
7ROPHY
Itâs clear even at the beginning of the month that âMeâ failed to live up to the success the group had found in the past year or so. They have a Random 1Line Dance video to film while theyâre at the SBS building for Inkigayo, but as the month goes on, management is eager to move past the era and while have plans for their next comeback entirely complete before 7ROPHY even finishes their promotions for âMeâ and theyâll only get the last week of the month for âMeâ to rest some before they begin work next month toward yet another comeback.
Important dates:
February 9: Random 1Line Dance video filming.
February 22: End of music show promotions.
February 29: Performance at The Fact Music Awards at Gocheok Sky Dome in Seoul, South Korea (also attending: WISH, Alien, Origin, Fuse).
Unity
The modeling opportunities keep rolling in in the absence of a comeback and Unity has been chosen as new ambassadors of NBAâs apparel line in Korea, which theyâll shoot a photo shoot for with Dazed Magazine. BC Soloist 1 will join them for the photo shoot to showcase the cross-gender appeal of the line. Their fourth anniversary is approaching in April, which means more personal freedom for the members contractually, but also comes with the expectation to give back to fans. This will be achieved in the form of a special gift song and video release. Theyâll record the song early in the month and film the accompanying video at the end of the month. The two main vocals and the leader have also been chosen to record an OST for the upcoming drama School 2017 this month.
Important dates:
February 13: Dazed Magazine March Issue photo shoot with BC Soloist 1.
February 27: Dream Come True anniversary MV filming.
       ⳠCHAMPION
With the album all recorded, that means itâs time to learn the choreography for âJoppingâ and âI Canât Stand The Rainâ, the main performance tracks but the applicable members will need to learn choreography for âSuper Carâ, â2 Fastâ, and âNo Mannersâ as well. Dance rehearsals will be done at BC Entertainmentâs building as the dance studios there are larger, and near the end of the month, BC will leak pictures and video of all of the CHAMPION members arriving at the building to spark discussion before the sub-unit is officially announced in a few months. For three days, all six members of CHAMPION will be sent on a bonding retreat in Jeonju to strengthen their bond as unit members. This is a genuine effort on the companiesâ parts to create better group chemistry, so the will not be filmed during the retreat, although a manager from each group will accompany them on the trip.
Important dates:
February 22-24: Bonding retreat in Jeonju, South Korea.
Lucid
Their extended fan sign run ends on the second day of the month, but the Lucid members are nowhere near a break as they prepare for their second anniversary (which will involve a special fan meeting where theyâll reveal their fandom name and light stick and perform their special second anniversary song for the first time to tease the return of their dark concept, so the members will learn the choreography for it in the first two weeks of the month). Theyâve been booked for every university orientation festival Dimensions could shove into their schedule, but theyâre also busy with concept meetings and studio recording for their next comeback.
Important dates:
February 1: Fan sign in Daejeon, South Korea.
February 2: Fan sign in Suwon, South Korea.
February 3: Second anniversary fan meeting teaser photo shoot.
February 16: Release of âFull Moonâ second anniversary single.
February 16: Second Anniversary Fan Meeting : REVERIE at Sogang University in Seoul, South Korea.
February 24: âFull Moonâ performance video filming.
February 25: Performance at Cheongju University Orientation Festival in Cheongju, South Korea.
February 26: Performances at Seokyung University Orientation Festival in Seoul, South Korea, and Bucheon University Orientation Festival in Bucheon, South Korea.
February 27: Performances at Sangmyung University Orientation Festival in Seoul, South Korea, and Dongseo University Orientation Festival in Busan, South Korea.
February 28: Performances at Sunghsin Womenâs University Orientation Festival in Seoul, South Korea, Hyundai Technical College Orientation Festival in Seoul, South Korea, and Seoul Hoseo Technical College Orientation Festival in Seoul, South Korea.
February 29: Performance at Hongik University of Science & Technology Orientation Festival in Seoul, South Korea.
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courtney eaton. 24. genderfluid. they & them. the front bottoms. | i canât believe i just saw LUCINDA âLUKEâ ARCHULETTA walking out of cadence records. theyâre the GUITAR & LEAD VOCAL from the INDIE ROCK group WE TRIED USING A BAND NAME GENERATOR who have been in the industry for SIX YEARS. the tabloids love to focus on their ALOOF nature , but theyâre also pretty HONEST and they seem to give off a vibe that reminds people of TYING FLANNELS AROUND YOUR WAIST, NEVER BEING WARM ENOUGH, PLAYING AN ACOUSTIC GUITAR IN A SHARP TUXEDO, CLAIMING YOU DONâT SMOKE MARIJUANA WHEN YOU DO, THE COMFORT AT THE BOTTOM OF A SWIMMING POOL.Â
                   she started talking backwards , but nothing                    good it brings her. so the next time that she                    sees him, itâll be peace sign + middle finger.                    to listen as you read.
listen i always say iâll stick with one muse and that never happens so iâll just skip the part here where i berate myself for being weAK and instead introduce u to lukey-pookie here !! theyâre a very new muse ( while also combining some essences of other muses of mine ) since normally i pick from a premade roster of my own ocs and normally use courtney for a... very different character but 1.) iâm gay and 2.) i love the front bottoms so HERE WE GO !
tws : depression, divorce, arrest, drug usage / overdose
HISTORY
So Luke was born to a regular working class family in Wilmington, Delaware - they have some relation with the famous DuPont family that built their name there, but donât have anything to show for it since a few generations ago Lukeâs great grandmother cut off the rest of her family and now they donât speak. So Archuletta it is.
Their mom worked a typical 9-5 job and their dad was an aspiring painter - but he was always... sick. Not sick in the physical sense, no - sick in the fact he never was himself. Sick in way that Luke always thought he was so tired and sad and nothing could ever cheer him up, and they rarely spent much time with him due to his tendencies to keep to himself. So that led to an early divorce between him and Lukeâs mother when they were about six years old.
So Lukeâs life was relatively normal. Maybe even too normal for them. And theyâd try and put themselves out there - even joining musical theatre in attempts to try and find âtheir group.â Musical theatre was where theyâd meet Krista.
A beautiful girl who had a passion for Broadway, booze, and marijuana - sheâd become Lukeâs greatest friend, and even taking Luke to meet their friends she hung out with regularly after class. But they werenât the kids youâd want to bring home to hang out with in your parentsâ house. No, in fact - they were the opposite.
Bad things, those friends did - well - bad ( or rather, illegal ) things, and Luke followed along. Such as smoking pot and getting caught for it, spraypainting and defiling public areas, maybe getting into a fight or two. In an effort to fit in, Luke would do the same - but they faced the consequences theyâd never thought - considering those kids seemed invincible. Untouchable.Â
Setting off fireworks from the roof of an abandoned building it a bad idea. Getting arrested the cops is an even worse idea. Your friends running off before they can get caught, leaving you alone to wait for your mom to pick you up... The worst idea.
Nobody came to check on them after that.
Not even Krista.
But the next day, Luke hung out with them like nothing was wrong, following that crowd still - and itâd only reach a breaking point when they were sixteen and had to call the ambulance since Luke found Krista in the bathroom of a party unconscious due to overdose. And thank god she survived -Â
And there they were again, without many friends since Krista was seemingly the only person who even came close to genuinely liking them and everyone else, they barely knew anything about. And Luke would grow, finishing high school and clinging to the only other friend they had since childhood - being convinced to write out their issues since by NOW, Luke maybe turned out a bit more cynical than they used to be.
Writings of prose and poetry turned to translating that to music - and that would be the beginning of their new life: We Tried Using A Band Name Generator.
ABOUTÂ âWE TRIEDâ:Â
âWe Tried Using A Band Name Generatorâ - or more conveniently just referred to as âWe Triedâ is probably Lukeâs pride and joy. It was their friendâs idea for them to originally write out how they felt - and they mutually came up with the decision to try and write songs out of that.
A small band from Wilmington didnât seem like it was going to get notice, and it took a little while, sure - it started with an EP titled Slow Dance to Soft Rock ( 2013 ) that made Cadence turn their way. Since the indie community definitely liked the acoustic sounds paired with raw, blunt, honest emotions pushed out in songs like The Beers and Swimming Pool. And that was when they got signed.
The first album theyâd release would be six months later - self-tilted, We Tried Using A Band Name Generator. They didnât have too much of a following at the time, but they were making good momentum enough to convince them to keep going.
Things were going so well, in fact, that during touring, Luke & their best friend / drummer actually attempted dating since - there had to be a reason they worked so well together. There had to be SOME feelings. But a million arguments later and stressful tours, overall mentally testing experiences, pushing out an EP called Rose which was as amazing as it was tacing to complete... they couldnât do it. It was thought that when their best friend left the group in early 2016, it was thought that everyoneâs new favorite indie rock group was done for.
And... Luke couldnât let that happen. It was selfish, too, in the sense that We Tried was their biggest method of release and comfort. So instead of just giving up, they got off from tour and IMMEDIATELY hit the studio for recording and song-writing.
The product of a few months of straight work would result in their 2016 album , Talon of the Hawk - all songs pulling experiences from the split between them and their drummer to their experiences with Krista in high school.Â
Au Revoir/Adios was 100% written the day after their ex-drummer left.Â
Another year of touring and thankfully, four more members joined the group - producing the EP Needy When Iâm Needy as a sneak peak of what was new to come. A few months later , a surprise album called Back on Top would come out.Â
The next three years would work well - with the band releasing another EP titled Ann and the inklings sprinkled of the next album - Going Grey. Â
SO IN CASE THAT WAS TOO COMPLEX BC I RAMBLE... again, general timeline:
February 2013: Release of Slow Dance to Soft Rock
March 2013: We Tried is signed to Cadence
August 2014: Release of Self-Titled.
September 2014: Both members of We Tried start dating.
July 2015: Release of Rose.
December 2015: Nearing the end of touring, We Triedâs drummer quits and the pair breaks up. Touring officially ends later that month.
January 2016: Luke Archuletta announces theyâll be taking time to focus on a brand new album.
August 2016: Release of the rushed but extremely well-received Talon of the Hawk.
July 2017: We Tried introduces four new members.
October 2017: Release of Needy When Iâm Needy.
March 2018: Release of the surprise album Back on Top.
January 2019: Release of the EP Ann, paired with the announcement production of the next album will begin soon.
March: Two songs - Peace Sign & You Used to Say (Holy Fuck) are released to tease Going Grey.
July 2018: Release of Going Grey.Â
SO YOU CAN SORT OF TELL THE TIMELINE IS SPEEDY - because thatâs a big part of how Luke sort of... overworks themselves and hyperfocuses on their music. Especially since ever since their first drummer left, they havenât let go of the idea they can only rely on themselves.Â
BUT MORE ABOUT THE BAND - We Triedâs aesthetic is sort of The Front Bottoms mixed with the Young Veins - Lukeâs especially fond of showing up in suits, vests, etc. despite the normally blunt & uncouth content of the songs.Â
There is literally always something being made. Luke canât sleep without having something in the works.Â
And... yeah thatâs it honestly itâs rly just TFB but with a TWIST!Â
ABOUT LUKEÂ
5â˛10, genderfluid bisexual bby who honestly just wants a nap
SOOOO yes, Lukeâs a very chill individual but chill in the sense that... they just. Donât care. Except when it comes to their work - then they work the hardest they can on that shit and have to pay attention to every little detail.
Theyâre still not actually sure if they have any talent - musical theater never seemed to work out, so why is a band doing that??
But they do have one thing down pat - directing. All of We Triedâs videos have so far been directed by Luke, save for a few.Â
This comes from Lukeâs longtime adoration of film and cinema, from the perspective of an observer and a director.
They DO have a tendency to be a little... clingy and aloof at the same time. Theyâre always worried about being in the position of trying to keep a band of only one person alive again but also they donât really notice they can other people to do things for them now.
Theyâre independent to a fault, in that case.
And also now finally getting a hang of not falling into peer pressure since itâs just made them cynical and aloof from people now.
Theyâre v grateful for their bandmates tho!! Donât get me wrong, they love them!
Lukeâs more of someone who communicates their appreciation through gestures and actions than words - setting a blanket on you while you sleep, getting new drumsticks if you broke yours, making coffee in the morning when youâve forgotten. That kind of stuff.
They donât get a lot of sleep for the sole reason they sort of have tendencies to keep themselves awake just... thinking. Luke thinks a lot. Lukeâs actually wack-levels of intelligent, and it does show in their music save for when theyâre making odd comments and obscure references.
Luke talks about tattoos a lot, but theyâre actually barren since theyâre afraid of needles.Â
They also donât drink, but they do smoke marijuana. But theyâll never admit to it - ...like TFB even though they have a MILLION songs that mention recreational use of the drug.
They sort of donât really know where their purpose is, still - and that does lead them into a depression of their own, much like their father. They donât talk to him and their mother that much nowadays - considering, the dream was always that Luke be a lawyer or a doctor and not the crass musician that they are.
Theyâre lowkey a fucking comedian but in the dry, deadpan humor sense. Most of their interviews consist of them making some joke that either takes a little while for the interviewer to get or one that makes the room silent for a quick minute. Or, even worse, theyâre taken seriously.
Despite this aloofness, though, they actually thrive on being around other people. Theyâre sort of relearning how to accept that, though, since again, theyâve been shelling themselves up in their own work for quite some time.Â
Also lowkey a bit of a flirt bt u didnât hear that from me
Rides a motorcycle partially to look cool and also... bc they have the song âMotorcycleâ which was about them. Trying to learn how to ride a motorcycle so it just kind of stuck.
Theyâve got another talent in dancing, since they took ballet classes throughout middle school to high school - but had to quit after they got arrested. Shame.
Their one dream was to be Ariel in the Broadway production of The Little Mermaid when they were younger since... they also love the sea and Disney Princesses so much secretly, but theyâve sort of given up on that.
Their love for the seaâs also because of where theyâre from - Delaware beaches are beautiful and were Lukeâs happy place back then.Â
Most of their loves and interests are sprinkled in their songs, in that case - Delaware scenery, references of Disney films, etc.
Theyâre a very... complex individual. But god I lOVE them.
WCs
THE DRUMMER. PLS GIVE ME THE DRUMMER. I HAV IT ON THE MAIN... PLS GIVE ME THE OG DRUMMER THAT LEFT AND NOW HAS A SOLO CAREER OR IS IN ANOTHER BAND ELSEWHERE. PLS.
also the current bandmates. that would b. cool.
if ppl from lukeâs old squad can show up now w/ their own careers... that would b. cool.
kids who they went to high school with that r surprised where they are now.
enemies in the music scene who donât like luke or we tried for a multitude of reasons
maybe they think lukeâs secretly a conceited dick underneath the âdistant mysterious songwriterâ schtick
mayBBEEEE they think the nature of we triedâs songs are some sort of keep gimmick to try and cash in on being âcasualâ and ârelatableâ
maybe they just donât like the damn band i mean. yeah.
any reason. pls.
hook-ups bc iâll b honest they are... a bit of a flirt. let luke serenade u w/ shit like âhistoric cemeteryâ cowards,
a rebound sort of?? probably very short-lived, but i can see luke wanting to get their mind off from their ex/drummer leaving and falling fast into another relationship - and that wouldnât work out bc of it.
iâd also lov a plot where maybe sb discovers lukeâs talent for dancing bc they do it for recreational purposes semi-often now??Â
maybe they can attend a class together or smth
or they just do it for fun at lukeâs place
idk this cld go anywhere n itâs honestly adorable
ppl that they befriend who they can just. take back to delaware one day.
or even ppl they just hang out with to relive the âgood ol daysâ
trips to the beach
buying store bought fireworks n setting them off
going on camping trips n shit
iâd lov a plot where thereâs one person who just thinks luke is like... a MYSTERY and they just get closer and closer in attempts to try and figure that mystery out
also 100% open to brainstorming! iâll actually get 2 interacting tmr bc itâs 2:30 AM nearly here n i want to sleep so yeah! chances are tho if u like this iâll message u for plotting!! again if u want my discord - hmu @ rocky lynch lovebot / hylia.#0329. :^)
i love the front bottoms so much
#* &. abt / â â ɪá´'s É´á´ Ęɪɢ sá´Ęá´ĘÉŞsá´ Ęá´á´ á´á´ĘÉ´á´á´
á´á´á´ á´ĘÉŞs á´Ąá´Ę â#cadence.intro#this took forever i'm so sorry#and it's not even GOOD it's so MESSY#if u want a good feel 4 their character too pls just... listen to any of tfb's first three albums on spotify#self-titled - talon of the hawk - back on top. pls.#i'd also say going grey bt admittedly i haven't actually listened to that one that much so! gotta get a better feel 4 it#drug tw#overdose tw#divorce tw#depression tw#arrest tw
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Word of the Day: Pseudepigrapha
Pseudepigrapha (anglicized "pseudepigraph" or "pseudepigraphs") are falsely attributed works, texts whose claimed author is not the true author, or a work whose real author attributed it to a figure of the past. (Wikipedia)
Yep, I'm talking about
The LDS church teaches that this book is not only scripture, but is a true record of two civilizations living in America from about 2200 BC to 420 (nice) AD.
The title page says:Â "Wherefore, it is an abridgment of the record of the people of Nephi, and also of the Lamanites-Written to the Lamanites, who are a remnant of the house of Israel."
If you've been here for a while you may remember when it used to say "they are the principal ancestors of the American Indians" but that's another story for another day.
The point is, Joseph Smith claimed this book was written by ancient prophets and is full of scripture that will guide your life. He, as the church does today, called it "the most true book".
And here's the problem.
The Book of Mormon is full of plagiarism of other books, errors and anachronisms (anachronisms in this case meaning objects, customs, and cultural ideas put in a time and place to which it does not belong.)
Horses, chariots, breastplates, elephants, cattle, compasses, bellows, brass, steel, copper, iron, silver, gold and silver currency, donkeys, sheep, swine, oxen, silk fabric, goats, wild goats, barley, wheat, and the concept of the seven day week all did not exist in the time and place the Book of Mormon is set. They are all in the Book of Mormon anyway.
The Book of Mormon includes passages from the 1769 King James Version Bible, which the Smith family owned, as well as errors from that edition that were corrected in later editions. I'm borrowing this table from the CES Letter to demonstrate these errors:
In addition to those errors and much plagiarism from the KJV Bible, the Book of Mormon contains text stolen from all the following sources:
Spaulding's Manuscript Found and Manuscript Story
The Late War by Gilbert J. Hunt
Pilgrim's Progress by John Bunyan
View of the Hebrews by Ethan Smith
Emanuel Swedenborg's Heaven and Hell and It's Wonders
John Lemprière's Classical dictionary of ancient proper names
The First Book of Napoleon
Shakespeare's Hamlet
Apocryphal Book of Enoch
Philosophy of a Future State published by Thomas Dick
With all this evidence, and not even getting into the translation problems, it is clear the Book of Mormon was not written by ancient Hebrew prophets in Early America, and is, in fact, a
pseudepigraph.
"But wait!", you may say, "how could it be a hoax written by Joe if eleven witnesses swore they handled the plates?"
No one ever saw the plates.
The witnesses saw and handled the plates "spiritually", and anyone else who testified of the plates said they did not see them as they were under a sheet, in a box, etc. Some choice quotes from the witnesses:
"While praying I passed into a state of entrancement, and in that state I saw the angel and the plates"
"....never saw the plates with his natural eyes but only in vision or imagination"
'I did not see them uncovered, but I handled them and hefted them while wrapped in a tow frock"
"I did not see them as I do that pencil case, yet I saw them with the eyes of faith; I saw them just as distinctly as I see anything around me - though at the time, they were covered with a cloth".
In addition, by 1847 all the surviving eleven witnesses had left the church.
David Whitmer said, "If you believe my testimony to the Book of Mormon; if you believe that God spake to us three witnesses by his own voice, then I tell you that in June, 1838, God spake to me again by his own voice from the heavens, and told me to separate myself from among the Latter-day Saints, for as they sought to do unto me, so should it be done unto them."Â
Add to all this the fact that the signatures of the witnesses were not theirs and were prepared in advance by Oliver Cowdery, and you may begin to feel, as I did, like Stephen Burnett:
"I have reflected long and deliberately upon the history of this church & weighed the evidence for & against it loth (sic) to give it up - but when I came to hear Martin Harris state in public that he never saw the plates with his natural eyes only in vision or imagination, neither Oliver [Cowdery] nor David [Whitmer] & that the eight witnesses never saw them & hesitated to sign that instrument for that reason, but were persuaded to do it, the last pedestal gave way, in my view our foundation was sapped & the entire superstructure fell in heap of ruins." (Stephen Burnett letter to Lyman E. Johnson dated April 15, 1838. Typed transcript from Joseph Smith Papers, Letter book, April 20, 1837 - February 9, 1843, microfilm reel 2, pp. 64-66, LDS archives.
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I posted 64 times in 2022
11 posts created (17%)
53 posts reblogged (83%)
Blogs I reblogged the most:
@cqlfeels
@rabbitcrimes
@asha-mage
@blessyouhawkeye
@piosplayhouse
I tagged 38 of my posts in 2022
Only 41% of my posts had no tags
#the untamed - 14 posts
#wangxian - 11 posts
#unfamd originals - 11 posts
#lan wangji - 11 posts
#cql - 9 posts
#mdzs - 8 posts
#wei wuxian - 6 posts
#jiang cheng - 4 posts
#lan xichen - 4 posts
#thoughts are being had - 2 posts
Longest Tag: 138 characters
#lxc sees the notification that lwj has sent him 16 voice messages in the last half hour and knows deep in his bones that this is about wwx
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
lan wangji is the ultimate tumblr girlie. he looks at wei wuxian and goes i could fix him i could make him worse i could join him in his madness. i want to put him in a pringles can and shake him until sex falls out. i want to cherish him until he literally expires of a love overdose. he makes me want to bite things. i would kill his brother for him if he asked and i also am sexualising every bad thing he has ever done. wei ying is lan wangji's problematic fave
80 notes - Posted November 26, 2022
#4
the key to understanding jiang cheng as a character is the realisation that he feels every emotion on the spectrum cranked up to the ultimate limit, sometimes all at once
146 notes - Posted February 28, 2022
#3
lan wangji is the Most guy ever bc pre-war he really is just so absolutely enraged by his own feelings towards wei wuxian that he has to both Pine and Yearn with the force of a thousand dying stars whilst also being the Most hall monitor dude about it. he's so annoyed at the fact that he has a crush that he has to go be the teacher's pet about it to feel better. the teacher is also his uncle. this neither adds nor takes away from the amount of Effort lan wangji puts into being the teacher's pet.
336 notes - Posted November 26, 2022
#2
look i just think that lwj should get to be as petty and mean and sublimely, perfectly dickish to jiang cheng as he wants, preferably in front of witnesses and with immense prejudice. say what you want about post-canon yunmeng shuangjie and their relationship but you can't tell me lwj would ever forgive jc even if he and wwx repair all their problems and get back to something approaching their relationship pre-war. there's no way lwj wouldn't make every lan clan gathering jiang cheng attends Actual Living Hell for the man with all the pointed subtlety that being Diplomatic 4D Chess Player Lan Xichen's brother has given him. jiang cheng cries multiple times every visit, and not even for nostalgic missing-the-good-times reasons. even the lan juniors feel sorry for him. lan jingyi once asked lwj if he thought he'd gone just a little too far when he told jiang cheng that there was a nice area up in the hills for sword practicing that 'had a good cliff edge he could use'. jiang cheng has never wished to die so many times in one visit. lwj would love to help him with that request, if the opportunity arose
427 notes - Posted November 25, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
i strongly believe that in any universe modern or otherwise lwj uses lan xichen as a kind of confessional like a catholic priest. he literally comes into lan xichen's room at four pm precisely because that's the scheduled time that he allows himself to share an Emotion with his brother and sits down and says in a distinctly monotone yet perfectly recognisably anguished tone 'brother i have sinned' and lan xichen sighs very quietly because he doesn't want to hurt his brother's feelings and puts down his pen and says 'is this about wei wuxian' very gently and Lan Wangji is like 'mn' because it has never once Not been about wei wuxian. and then he says something that is Kind Of Weird, But Still Not A Sin like 'he fell asleep when we were studying and i watched his ribcage moving up and down for thirty eight minutes until he choked on nothing and woke himself up; am i evil' and once again lan xichen will kind of not-sigh in a way that makes it very obvious that in all other ways except physical he Is, Indeed, Sighing and has to reassure the most rigidly distraught younger brother in the history of mankind that what he is suffering from is in fact a malady known colloquially as a crush
1,978 notes - Posted November 25, 2022
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review â
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the great tag meme
since i havenât done a tag meme in like a million years or so iâm compiling everything that the natural wonders of the world @headstudents @harrypotterr @beaubcxton @araniaexumae @scorpiusmahfoy @reysky-walker @pansypparkinson @billdelacour @olivunders have tagged me in for the last⌠a while (iâm sorry and i love you all)
[redundant/repeated questions omitted; not tagging bc this is a beast of a meme but if you want to do it by all means just say i tagged you and i will]
name: seren
star sign: libra
gender: nonbinary
height: 1.7m / 5â7â
sexuality: queer af
what image do you have as a wallpaper: on my laptop itâs a picture i took at an alpine lake in oregon
where do you see yourself in ten years: probably still figuring out my life but with a dog
if you could be anywhere else right now, where: on a picnic with my friends
what was your coolest halloween costume: red riding wolf
what is your favorite 90âs show: the adventures of brisco county jr. i fuckin loved that show and it did not deserve to be canceled in its prime
last kiss: unpleasant
have you ever been stood up: i donât think so
have you ever been to las vegas: i drove past it once on my way back from the grand canyon
favourite pair of shoes: black laceup boots that iâve worn long enough for the thrift store pricing written in sharpie on the sole to be worn off completely
favourite fruit: nectarine
favourite book: i just read six of crows and it was game-changing
stupidest thing youâve done: pick one
nicknames: seren, stars, cottontail
nationality: american, currently living in new zealand
favorite season: the autumnal transition to winter and then yuletide
favorite flower: daisies (but tulips and roses have special meaning for me now)
favorite scent: tossup between rain, pine, coffee, and the seaÂ
favorite color: deep deep blue
favorite animal:Â listen buddy iâm studying wildlife conservation biology asking me to choose a favorite animal is like asking me to pick my favorite way to die (itâs bears. to both)
coffee, tea or hot chocolate:Â coffee with hot chocolate mixed in fight me
average hours of sleep:Â either 4 or 12 there is no in between and either way iâm always exhausted
cat or dog person: both person
favorite fictional character: harry potter
number of blankets you sleep with:Â as many as possible to snuggle into and then overnight i get too hot and kick them all off in my sleep and wake up an icicle
dream trip: a great uk/european tour of history and natural landscapes w/ @literaetures
blog created:Â like march? idk i checked and it was actually february time flies
number of followers: 428 (and i still havenât finished my celebration for 333 w h o o p s)
random fact: both of my knees have sports-related damage: the right from a slide tackle in soccer and the left from strain from years of swimming breastroke competitively and for work
colors iâm currently wearing: black and grey. exciting
last band đ i bought: does hozier count
last band i saw live: see above
lipstick or chapstick: chapstick
last song i listened to: preach by keiynan lonsdale
last movie i saw: deadpool 2 in june
last three đş shows i đ: merlin, las chicas de cable, b99 (!!!)
three characters i identify with personality wise:Â sirius black, ginny weasley, pippin
đ iâm currently reading: crooked kingdom
relationship status: contentedly single
time: 14:50
last thing i googled: percy Jackson musical (no regrets)
song stuck in my head: curious by hayley kiyoko
 rules: weâre snooping on your playlist. set your entire music library on shuffle and report the first 10 songs that pop up then choose 10 victims.
1.     miss me blind â culture club
2.     welcome to the occupation â rem
3.     jaded â green day
4.     situations â jack johnson
5.     something in the way â nirvana
6.     all over â cruisr
7.     the kitchen floor â little green cars
8.     the prisoner â tears for fears
9.     dirty laundry â don henley
10.  gimme gimme shock treatment (live) - ramones
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@cha-eunwoow and @sanhatation hit me with that x2 tag combo (đđđ) I was gonna put them both in this post but it.... got very long... so I will split them up after all đ
First up is a Kpop one from lovely Liv (hey girl I hope things are going better for you!!)
To anyone who genuinely reads through all of this bless your heart and ily
1) 5 favorite groups?
f(x), ASTRO, SHINee, Day6, Dreamcatcher
2) Top 5 on your bias list? (no particular order)
Lol I just did this, so: Amber, Jinjin, Onew, S.coups, Wonpil (though if we can double from groups my girl Luna would 100% be here)
3) Ult Bias group and why you love them?
f(x) - they were my first group and will forever be my ults. I just love how unique they are both as a group and each member individually! Every member shines so much in their own way and can absolutely stand as artists in their own right (and have been proving so with their solo projects the past 2+ years), and when they come together they create things that are so cool and beautiful and unique đ Honest to god after I sat down and listened to their whole discography on Spotify for the first time, I listened to nothing but them 8+ hrs a day, 7 days a week for almost a month I was so in love (i'm not exaggerating you can ask my roommate aldbaj) (SM please let us have f(4) again I would literally cry). That being said I also consider ASTRO and SHINee to be ults, and could write whole paragraphs for them as well đÂ
(but yâall please support my girls, Victoria put out a Chinese single and should be following with an album, Amberâs halfway through releasing videos for her mixtape & Luna is releasing 2 digital singles this coming week! Krystal has no musical projects atm but you can check out her dramas and modeling~)
4) Ult Bias and why you love them?
My kpop origin story revolves around me coming across the Electric Shock mv in 2013 and being both in love with and absolutely floored by Amber. A girl? In a girl idol group? With short hair?? Who presents in a masculine way?? I couldnât believe it was something the companies would let happen and it was so. I don't even know. But I knew it was really meaningful and important to me. 3 years later I actually fully listen to the group (honestly thank got I needed new music to listen to at work) and I finally learned her name - Amber Liu. I'm someone who id's as nonbinary, and I've really struggled with my perceived femininity my whole life - its something I'm still working through. When I saw Amber, a person working in a very gender stereotype-heavy industry and culture, being able to present in the way she's comfortable and standing up for the rights of others to do the same, it just really touched me on a deep personal level. Even though I know she id's as cishet she still has done a lot for those of us that don't, and I'm sooo insanely proud of her for sticking to her guns and choosing to live her truth through all of the hell people have given and continue to give her for it. Not only has she stuck it to the haters by prospering, but she's taken her experiences and her talents and made them into absolutely beautiful works of art.Â
She uses her music to express her feelings and talk about her struggles, and the fact that her work is so personal and has so much of her in it also means a lot to me (please listen to Borders, Need to Feel Needed, Beautiful, Heights, and this cover of One More Light NOTE: if self harm is a bad topic for you, maybe skip One More Light and the Borders mv (the song is fine and ultimately uplifting, and the mv does end happily). She has worked so. damn. hard. to pursue her dreams and passions, often having to rely on just herself and her friends to work when SM just straight up refuses to do their JOB as her MANAGEMENT COMPANY, and somehow she keeps doing it with that beautiful smile.
Aside from all the gooshy stuff, sheâs just really goofy and fun (and attractive >>) AND she was born just 2 months before me so I feel thereâs a connection (also my parents considered naming me Amber and she considered my name as a stage name??? #starcrossedlovers). Finally she has literally the cutest dog in the world please look at this picture and cry with me
5) Favorite Kpop Meme
lmaooo now that Iâve poured my heart out over Amber, lets look at the human meme that is Lee Taemin (i just picked one but my favorite meme is just. him.)
And a special shoutout to all of the rest of the SHINee memes, like I thought about linking just one but there are so many legendary classics how do you choose (I got to experience the burnt Gucci story in person though so a super special shoutout to that one)
6) Favorite pic of your ult? (I dare you to only pick one)
Iâll do both my ults since this is my Astro blog but Iâve only talked about f(x) so far ;;;;;
For Amber, this picture has been my phone background for well over a year now so I guess this one?? Itâs from the song festival when she and Ksuke debuted Breathe Again (many months before itâs official release) and she was just feeling herself so much during the performance (credit for the pic most likely goes to her fansite Ambossing)
As for Jinwoo adljasdfs I only have like 100 pics of him just on my phone this is fine Iâm gonna pick this one, bc when he posted it I loved it so much I came very close to literally printing it out and framing it...... he just looks so happy!! And heâs being his most natural self, no hair/makeup, out with his family, doing something he loves. It just Warms My Heart
7) Â Favorite Kpop MVs
Ok this is a whole can of worms, so Iâll try to limit it to just 10 I quite like?? (in no specific order)
1) Astro - Baby 2) VIXX - Error 3) Seventeen - Lilili Yabbay 4) SHINee - Boys Meet U 5) EXID - DDD 6) KNK - Rain (performance ver) 7) Oh My Girl - Closer  8) f(x) - Electric Shock 9) Crayon Pop - FM 10) Taemin - Saynoara Hitori (I know it was a Japanese release but ssssh Iâm counting it WAIT HECK i just realized Boys Meet U was a Japanese release too asdlfjasf welp)Â
Also shoutout to this cover Dreamcatcher did of Maroon 5â˛s Lucky Strike
9) Favorite Kpop crack video?
I donât have a single specific one, there are so many quality compilations (I have watched a surprising number of Seventeen as Vines videos though lmao)Â
10) Favorite content creator(s) within the fandom?
All Aroha are super talented ok, If I listed everyone that came to mind weâd be here for longer than anyone needs to be....
11) What fandoms would you say youâre an active member of?
the only fandom Iâm fully in thatâs been active in Korea the past year is Astro :â) But thatâs well enough, I really do love this community!
12) Take your top 3 biases- fmk
omg no why
F-Jinjin asldfjasdf
M-Amber
K- Onew..... no this is wrong :< Iâm changing the k from kill to kiss ok? ok.
13) If you could be best friends with any idol, who would you choose?
Honestly probably Luna - she is one of the single most uplifting people in the world and sheâs always ready for a good time! Queen of self love!
14) If you could date any idol, who?
I would never want to date an idol unless they were no longer/never an idol - trying to date around the antis and media would just be way too stressful on its own, plus the idol would be so busy all the time youâd barely get to see each other anyway
15) Whatâs one Kpop album you think everyone should have listened to?
SHINee - Married to the Music
16) Are you a soft or a hard stan?
yes (depends on the idol)
17) An idol that makes you go into soft mode?
Yoon Sanha, my soft noodle, my potato son
18) An idol that makes you want to smash the empire state building with one single punch?
@ Park Jaehyung meet me behind the Taco Bell at midnight
19) Favorite vocalist?
MJ/Luna/Onew
20) Favorite Rapper?
Iâve been thinking a lot about this lately and Iâm honestly not sure??? Some contenders are Rocky and LE though
21) Favorite dancer?
sdflajsfadsf why must you hurt me in this way Iâll say Taemin because he really puts a lot of thought and self into his dance, and heâs actively trying to create change in the way the industry thinks about gender and dance
22) Things you have in common with your ult?
I think I pretty much touched on all that with Amber, so for Jinjin we both love dogs and like the drums, we can be quick to smile, we try to lead in an understanding/accommodating way rather than a total authoritarian way, we do That Face⢠when someone is pushing our buttons lol
23) The most beautiful trait any idol can have?
Kindness and an open mind
24) Songs that will always make you jam along?
how....long do you want to be here adsflj I will say the song that gets me jamming the MOST at work is N.Flying - Hot Potato
25) Your worst wrecker?
Iâm here today to talk to you about a dangerously beautiful man named Kim Myungjun
26) Any kpop concerts youâve been to?
I saw SHINee in Dallas with my bff in 2017, then I went to Astro in DC all by my lonesome this past February! (so I just need to see f(x) and Iâll have gone to all 3 ult groups) Also fun fact my good friend @jinjins-freckles was also at those two concerts, but we didnât know each other yet for the SHINee one - funny how things work out~
27) Favorite choreo?
THIS. THIS IS THE HARDEST QUESTION. I CANâT. IMPOSSIBLE. Iâm not even gonna try and list some.... theres.... too many;;;;
28) Favorite live performance?
ok look first of all, you come into MY house, and ask me to pick ONE performance adslfj Iâll say SHINeeâs Woof Woof bc I was absolutely obsessed with it after I discovered it, its just so fun and goofy but also bops hard as heck??? Legends Only
29) Favorite debut mv?
Hide & Seek cleared my skin watered my crops and gave me a lil smooch on the forehead
30) Recommend a rookie group
Dreamcatcher!!! Theyâre having a comeback in May please support our goth goddesses
31.) A kpop song you could listen to every day for the rest of your life?
Astro - Puss n Boots
32) Tag some cute mutuals youâd like to get to know better (and to do this challenge)!
Since sheâs tagged me a few times lately Iâll tag @myunghjun (and thatâs it asdlj if you read all the way to the end consider yourself tagged too ok ily)
#tag game#this took me so long aslfj i'm actually tired now#click if you want to see my love letter to amber
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