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abbatoirablaze · 2 years ago

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Just Ben, Chapter 7

Word Count: 1.5k

“It’s only going to be a short trip, sweetheart.”

“That’s what you said last time Ben,” you sighed as your hands pressed against his superhero suit. Your sigh was one of discontent, and he knew that as he lifted your face, cradling your jaw in his hands, “I was so scared that you wouldn’t come back to me last time, Ben.”

“You know I’ll always come back to you doll,” he sighed. You bit back the tears that were threatening to fall down your cheeks and tried to look away, but he held your face firmly in his grasp, “hey…don’t go looking away from me, Adelaide.”

“I’m just scared…” you admitted sadly, a loose tear spilling down your face. His frown deepened as he used a thumb to swipe it away, “I don’t want to lose you, Ben.”

“You’ll never lose me, sweetheart,” he promised, “I’ll always come back for you, you hear me? Once I get back from that jungle I’m going to put a rock on your finger, just like I promised. And we’re moving ourselves to the suburbs before that baby comes along.”

“Promise…”

“I promise sweetheart!”

“You’re lying!” you accused, glaring at Crimson Countess, the tears threatening to fall even more as one of the TNT twins held you back, “you’re lying to me. I KNOW IT! YOU’RE LYING!”

“She’s not lying!” Tommy said firmly as you began breaking down, “You have to lis-“

“Back away from her!”

The twins were quick to move, and you were left standing face to face with none other than Mr. Edgar. You ran towards him, and he caught your arms, holding them close to your own chest, “Stan…please…tell me. Where’s Ben? Why isn’t he here?”

“There was an accident over there, Adelaide! We were ambushed in the dead of night…and things didn’t go as planned,” he said solemnly. It killed him and Swatto…nearly eviscerated Black Noir! We tried to bring him back….but…I’m so sorry.”

“No…no, Ben….he-he promised!” you whimpered, before finally breaking down into a sobbing heap on the floor. Mr. Edgar caught you, and allowed himself to fall to the ground with you while you cried, clutching his shirt. Your sobs racked your body as you clung to the man that you despised for comfort.

And he let you.

It was like he was absorbing all of your pain, allowing you to shove it all onto him.

Because he knew it was his fault. He knew that the reason why Ben was gone was because he pushed him into one last mission. He told him to do the Nicaragua mission…and he did. And he paid for it with his life.

You don’t know how long you stayed like that, fighting your emotions, letting every ounce of anguish flood from your body to his. But by the time the tears had dried up, and exhaustion had taken over your body, he was calling for a medical team to load you onto a gurney to make sure that you and your unborn child was okay.

“Wh-where are you taking me?”

“Don’t use up your energy, Adelaide,” he said calmly, his hand holding yours while he remained your only source of comfort, “it’ll only work up the baby and yourself…you need fluids…and something to eat. And rest!”

“Ben…”

“Ben is gone, Adelaide…you need to do what is best so that his legacy can live on through you and your child,” he said gently, “the medical team is going to give you something to help you rest…”

“My baby…”

“It’s safe for the baby, Adelaide…you just need to rest.”

When you woke up it felt like you were being blinded. The pure white walls and ceiling made you feel both nauseous and dizzy. You were quick to roll to your side and fall off the bed. Landing on your hands and knees, it was mere seconds before your stomach turned, and the violent lurch created within made acid rise through your esophagus and spew all over the otherwise clean white tiled floor.

The door opened and you were surrounded by white lab coats, all of which were attempting to help you up, but the overlapping voices made you feel like you were going insane. You fell back onto your ass and your hands went over your ears.

It felt like your senses and nerve endings were on fire.

“Stop….stop….STOP!”

A powerful blast threw everyone and everything in your vicinity into the walls.

You felt like you were going to be sick again when you heard a singular voice over the intercom, “Adelaide…you need to calm down!”

Your heart ached as the last time you were awake burned into your brain.

Ben was gone.

Mr. Edgar was getting you some help sleeping.

They injected something into you.

“My baby…”

“Your baby is fine, Adelaide…but I need you to calm down before your baby thinks it’s being put into a distressing situation,” Edgar warned over the intercom, “you see the doctors and nurses on the floor? The baby was overwhelmed, and used a forcefield to push them away from you…you need to take a few deep breaths so that we can calm you two down…”

“Ben’s gone,” you whimpered sadly, looking around the room. Your hands went to your stomach and you could feel the low pulsing of your unborn child, “he promised…I-my baby’s all I have left of him…”

“I need you to calm down, Adelaide.”

This time the voice wasn’t coming from the intercom. It was coming from the door of the room. You blinked a few times, and he seemed to immediately understand. He reached out to the outside of the room, and the light receded back into the corners, the lighting becoming softer and more bearable.

“Th-thank you…”

“I need to show you something…” he said calmly, “But I need you to calm down before I can take you there…”

You stared through the window in horror.

There was a little boy, no more than five years old, actively being engaged by a scientist. Your heart ached at how much he looked like he man that you’d loved. The only difference was that his hair was lighter than either yours or Bens.

“Wh-why didn’t Ben and I know?”

Mr. Edgar gave you a soft frown, “we didn’t want the child to kill you…”

You looked at him, shock evident on your face, “Wh-what?”

“When you met Soldier Boy…at that…event that he and the twins held…and you started getting sick once you two…became an item…do you remember that?”

You shook your head, “n-not really…I remember you telling him that you would take me down here to medical…but that it was too early and that we couldn’t be seen together…especially not with my…profession.”

“We’d been trying to create a superhero baby for years…Soldier boy had undergone so many experiments to have his own children,” he began, “we’d used female donors…test tube trials…nothing seemed to work…until you came along…but when we started our research on you and the embryo…we found out that he was killing you.”

“What?”

“He was sucking the very life right out of you…so we told soldier boy that we were going to keep you alive long enough that the baby would survive…but he refused. He told us to terminate the pregnancy instead.”

“He knew?”

“That was why he became adamant that you be allowed to move in with him and that we fast-forward the process of you officially being his significant other,” Edgar nodded, “he said that he wouldn’t lose you, even at the cost of his unborn child.”

“But that child…he-he’s alive…”

“We surgically removed him from you and implanted him in a donor,” he admitted, adjusting his glasses, “admittedly, it was more than one. He killed two women in the first trimester alone…until finally someone came up with the idea to insert him into a bovine.”

“You put…my son…in a cow?”

“Women weren’t volunteering once they read the waivers…cows were…disposable…”

“And that’s how…he’s here?”

“We told him that his father is dead…but that you survived…we want you to meet him,” he said slowly, “we want you to stay with Vought, and raise him…he’s doing alright with our scientists…but we feel like his actual mother would be more…correct…”

“Wh-what’s his name?”

“Homelander…” he replied curtly, “he’s only got a superhero name, and it’s Homelander.”

“Ah…you must be the mother…”

You jumped, nearly out of your skin as a scientist came up out of nowhere.

“Doctor Vogelbaum…good to see you,” Mr. Edgar said firmly, exchanging handshakes with the man, “this is Adelaide…she was Soldier Boy’s significant other…and the mother of Homelander…”

“So nice to finally meet you while you’re not under anesthetics.”

“We’ve met before?”

“Briefly,” he smiled, “I was the one that has taken care of young Homelander every step of the way…was actually the surgeon that removed him from you initially.”

“So he…he’s really…”

“Your son…yes…”

“And he’s…part of Ben too?”

“I can assure you that the child you are carrying now is the second child you have conceived with Soldier Boy,” he smiled, “Homelander was born, officially, July 4, 1981…”

“But he…he looks like he’s a kindergartner…”

“Homelander is only three, Adelaide.”

“Three?”

“Yes,” Doctor Vogelbaum agreed, gesturing towards the door, “Would you like to meet your son, Adelaide?”

Chapter 8

Tag List: @lohnes16, @vmenfangirl

#just ben #soldier boy #the boys #vought #stan edgar #payback #crimson countess #homelander #vogelbaum

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pocket-ozwynn · 2 years ago

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Genesis Day: Chapter 6

[Kaiju!AU]

Previous Chapter: Chapter 5

Next Chapter: Chapter 7

Word Count: 4644

Note, this chapter deals directly with the following topics: implied danger, grief, & general trauma surrounding death of a loved one.

Alice couldn’t breathe.

Her dark, honeyed lips met his. She inhaled softly as their mouths locked. He found himself lost in the tide of her breathing.

She pulled away just enough so he caught a glimpse of her eyes in the candlelight–they were like liquid brass.

Her hair fell to hide their faces behind copper curtains as she rested her forehead against his. Her nose found its place within the crook of his as she moved in closer. She had a gravity that pulled him straight out of his proverbial orbit–and he was all too happy to fall against her.

Her cashmere fingers laced in his. She held him fast, not wanting to let go…

Maura dug her fingers into his bicep…the look of panic and desperation in her eyes as she shoved her tablet into his hands…her shouts…her helplessly sailing through the air…screaming…

Alice’s lungs felt like brittle glass that might shatter if he dared breathe too deeply. Instinctively he clutched Maura’s tablet as hard as he could–so tightly in fact that his biceps trembled.

Bile crept up Alice’s throat as his thoughts started to darken. Against his will, his morbid imagination started to rot like a festering wound as he started to think about how Maura might’ve looked…

After she fell.

C R A C K.

An explosion clapped his ears, accompanied by a flash. Alice screamed. Visions of grenades and tanks danced in his head as his heart pounded right against the ribs. Even as he scrambled, trying to figure out where to run he felt something wet against his face. It was raindrops gently kissing his cheeks, bringing him back into the present.

It wasn’t the military, it was just the storm.

Alice set his jaw and attempted to relax as he steadied his breathing. He inhaled deeply to focus on the smell of the mountain rain, but found his lungs groaning in protest…

“Are you okay?”

Alice jumped. All of a sudden, it was coming back to him now. He was sitting in the hollow of a woman’s hand.

Freyja.

Fingers bigger than his whole body twitched slightly as she waited for his reply. Each step of hers sent a jolt up his spine, but in a weirdly grounding way. It was like a mighty metronome that Alice could focus on, and not his morbid daydreams.

Alice’s breath was shaky. His cheeks grew hot with embarrassment as he realized the once-soldier/now-Whatever-She-Was might’ve heard him scream–unless his panic was lost in the clap of thunder. He choked back his tears, “…y-yeah. Yeah, I’m okay.”

Thunder shook the sky once more–this time, Alice wasn’t startled by it. He groaned slightly as the falling rain started to wet his clothing just enough for it to start sticking to his body like soggy tissue paper.

Freyja gasped softly, “Oh! Um…here.”

Without another word, Alice felt the drops ease up as an aqua expanse of muscle and bone moved over him to act as a makeshift gazebo. Alice couldn’t help but look up in quiet awe as she moved. He studied the hand quietly, drinking in the reality that that was the same hand that had crushed a military truck like a ball of tin foil. It was the same hand that enveloped him so suddenly and securely to save him from the soldier’s grenade, and to keep him from falling out as she accidentally tumbled down the mountain. In retrospect it was just a hand–heck, Alice had two of his own–but within the last few hours he had witnessed this newly reorganized hand bring both destruction and security with the most casual of efforts.

Muscle enveloping him from every side. Fingers curling to push him flush against her palm…he felt her pulse all around him. She occasionally squeezed tighter, but not tight enough to hurt–just to keep him safe. To keep him close.

She wasn’t a gravity that commanded him to fall because physics demanded obedience; she was an embrace of distilled safety.

If Maura had been the one to transform and Freyja the one to fly out the window, would Maura have protected him the same way?

A guilty part of Alice wasn’t quite sure if she would have.

He found himself lost as he examined Freyja’s palm–every line, every muscle…even the faint scars and rough calluses were fascinating to him. This hand told a story, and Alice was able to witness it up close in a way he didn’t think was possible.

After what felt like an awkward few moments of staring up at her hand, Alice shook himself from his stupor and quietly thanked her.

To his astonishment, Freyja seemed to hear him. “You’re welcome.”

They walked wordlessly through the rain–the rushing river at her feet and the rustling trees provided the only words that accompanied Freyja’s footsteps.

Surprisingly, Alice actually felt safe enough to close his eyes. The sensation of her walking mixed with the ambience of a rainstorm in the Cascadian mountains was enough to make him feel nearly peaceful at this moment.

Alice wasn’t quite sure how long Freyja had walked, but it was long enough that when she finally spoke Alice had somehow managed to nod off.

“Hey, what’s that?” Freyja asked, which prompted Alice to jerk awake.

Alice inhaled sharply and rubbed his eyes. He peered through the pouring rain and squinted to try and see what she was pointing at…

Though blurry eyed and having to peer through the rain and mist, Alice could presumably spy what Freyja was talking about. It was a cabin of some sort–single floor, though perhaps with an attic–with a towering metal windpump and carport off to one side. The blades of the windpump were attempting to spin, but they appeared stuck on something. Surrounding the cabin was a series of abandoned cars and trucks in various degrees of disrepair along with various items like oil drums, broken TVs, and shattered toilet bowls. It felt less like a lived-in place, and more of a dumping ground.

“That’s not creepy at all,” Alice noted dryly. Though he would be lying if he said his curiosity wasn’t at least a bit piqued. “I wonder if anyone lives out here...”

“We can try knocking?” Freyja ventured. “And maybe if no one’s home and the door’s open you can borrow a bed for the night? That way you can stay dry while you try to poke around with that tablet.”

Alice furrowed his brow. His instinct was to try and look her in the eyes to see if she was kidding or not, but given her hand was serving as his gazebo, “I mean…yeah, maybe.” Alice’s instinct was to even wonder if there WAS a bed, what kind of condition it might be in. But then another thought crossed his mind…Freyja putting herself between him and the Engine…Freyja swatting away the soldier who had a pistol jammed in Alice’s ribs…the hand over his head…

“But…what about you?” Alice asked.

“What about me?” Freyja chuckled. “There’s NO way I’d fit in there…nah, I’m totally fine sleeping out in the mud and rain. Wouldn’t be the first time either.”

Alice’s cheeks grew hot. “I-I mean…” He must’ve sounded like an idiot, of course she couldn’t fit into the cabin. He scooted around a bit so he could peer past her hand and up at her, “But…I can’t let you sleep outside in the rain all by yourself. That’s what I meant.”

Freyja leaned down a bit to get a better look at Alice. She looked almost a bit…surprised, that he would offer to sleep outside in the rain with her, “That’s sweet of you, but really–I’m fine. I ‘ppreciate you offering though.”

Alice furrowed his brow slightly as she looked straight ahead. That seemed to be Freyja’s way of closing the door on that offer. Still, Alice was incredibly stubborn…

“Mind if I put you down?” Freyja asked as they approached the cabin. “I wanna check something out…”

Alice was curious as to what she meant, but nodded, “Yeah, that’s fine. Um…thank you for carrying me for so long.”

“Not even a problem!” Freyja stopped and lowered her hand down to the ground. She lifted her other hand and gave a grin as she teasingly remarked, “You’re not even a handful!”

Alice couldn’t help but giggle at that. “I, ah…um…g-good point…”

He felt his cheeks grow hot too. That confused Alice more than anything had tonight.

Sheepishly, Alice lighted from palm to ground and hurriedly made his way up the muddy path towards the cabin with Freyja’s heavy footfalls following up behind him. While Alice was being a bit more careful about where he stepped with all the odds and ends strewn about, Freyja did not seem to worry nearly as much (as was evident by the occasional crunch of porcelain or groaning of metal with a quiet “oops, sorry” muttered to no one in particular).

As Alice made his way to the door, he spied Freyja’s form towering heading over towards the windpump. He paused and curiously examined as she poked around a bit with the struggling blades, before twisting one back into place. She then took her finger and manually spun the windpump as if it was a pinwheel. Her countenance lit up as she watched the blades spin to her touch. After she realized Alice was watching, her cheeks turned to a wine-colored flush.

“I’ve, um…always wanted to do that,” she explained sheepishly as she rubbed the back of her neck.

Just the wonder she had in her expression...

“You have?” Alice couldn’t help but smile. He furrowed his brow in mild surprise.

Freyja grinned shyly and shrugged, “Hell yeah! Ever since I was a kid…”

“That’s…actually really cute,” Alice smiled before turning back towards the door and gently knocked on the loose screen door.

He waited a breathless moment before tucking Maura’s tablet under one arm, opened the screen door, then knocked a bit more firmly. He waited a few moments before knocking again. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Freyja crouch down to see what might happen next.

“Hello?” Alice called out. He was going to call out once more before he noticed the cobwebs coming off the doorknob.

“Looks like no one’s been here in a while,” he noted to Freyja before brushing off the webbing and trying the knob. To his surprise, it opened. Holding his breath and praying there wasn’t a shotgun barrel on the other end of this door, Alice opened the door and stepped in.

Alice started coughing as soon as he crossed the threshold. The air was heavy with dust and mildew and the scent of familiar chemicals. Alice reached out for the clunky lightswitch by the door and it responded with a satisfying click.

The single grime caked lightbulb cast a dim amber glow throughout the meager cabin, casting long shadows that left corners obscured in deep darkness. Off to the left there was a kitchenette which had been converted into some sort of workstation. Alice spied a series of jars, burners, among other instruments.

“Weird…” Alice murmured as he eyed the kitchenette-turned-workshop. Those jars definitely weren’t filled with canned peaches and brown sugar. He turned his attention away from the jars and towards a sunken couch that looked like it might collapse if someone even breathed the wrong way. It wasn’t much, but it would have to do. Alice wasn't keen on sleeping in mud or on a dirty, abandoned cabin floor.

Alice went for the couch, but he paused midstep. His curiosity was getting the better of him. He chewed his lip thoughtfully, eyed the jars, then pivoted and skipped towards the kitchen. He bent over and examined the jars and with painter tape with labels scribbled in sharpie.

“Potassium chlorate & aluminum…” Alice murmured before stifling a yawn with his fist. He noticed some charcoal too.

“Everything okay in there?” Freyja called out. Alice’s eyes widened as her resonance shook the cabin. The jars shivered a bit on the counter, the loose cabins rattled.

Alice was still getting used to the fact that such a person could exist now. And it was confusing why he didn’t just…scream and run.

Alice turned around towards the door and found his breath caught in his throat as he was met by an eye looking right at him.

Alice had seen this sort of thing in movies. Plenty of versions of Jack and the Beanstalk with a carnivorous tyrant, stuff with fierce dragons or wild sea beasts…terrifying, vicious, sometimes even curious predators and hunters gazing down upon their meal.

But this…this wasn’t that. Seeing her eye was different.

Cutting through the darkness of the porch was the verdant glow of Freyja’s gaze. Her eye glowed like a soothing lamp–nothing domineering, but still there. It was a calming light that invited safety, but did not demand attention. Her gaze was loving, curious, attentive, present…

…she NOTICED him.

She had lovely eyes.

Alice’s cheeks grew hot as he stammered, “Y-Yeah! Just…just some weird stuff.” He gestured to the kitchen. “Dunno who used to live here but there’s a bunch of chemicals and stuff…honestly, it looks like the kind of thing you’d use to make homemade fireworks.”

The scarlet skin around Freyja’s eye twitched–though he couldn’t see it, he guessed she was making some kind of look of curiosity. “Wait, really? How do you know that?”

Alice felt his heart stop. He hesitated, then opted to lie. “I was good at chemistry in school.”

Freyja gave him a quizzical look from the door, but just shrugged. “Huh…cool. Didn’t peg you for a chemistry guy.”

Alice tossed the tablet onto the couch cushion. He got down low and lifted one end of the couch. The couch’s legs screeched against the floor as Alice grunted. He felt a bit lightheaded trying to move this all by himself after all of tonight’s excitement, but was trying his best.

“What are you doing?”

“Joining…you…outside…” Alice grunted as he kept trying to haul the couch. “Th-there’s a carport, right?”

“I mean, yeah, but…” Freyja seemed reluctant as she watched Alice finally manage to get the front half of the couch out the door. While Alice took a moment to breathe, she asked, “Do you need any help?”

“I-I got it,” Alice insisted as he set back to work.

After a few moments of trying to struggle with the couch, Alice’s vision was filled as Freyja reached out to delicately place a thumb and forefinger to either side of the sofa. With as much ease as lifting an eraser, she took it off his hands and moved it from the porch to the carport in less than a second. Once she set it down she gently pushed it in further with the tip of her finger–while also trying to be careful with her new claws.

“Ta-daaaa!” Freyja beamed as she gestured to the spot. “How’s this?”

“It looks perfect, thank you for the help,” Alice leaned up against one of the porch’s supports and just smiled.

Freyja ducked her head and laughed, “Thank you for wanting to keep me company.”

As he crawled up onto the sofa, Freyja laid down next to the carport on her side, with her torso running parallel to the carport while she tucked up her legs against one of its entrances. It was almost a protective sort of gesture--as if she was curling up next to it to keep him safe.

Alice stared at the tablet in his lap for a long moment. He held it reverently like a silicone reliquary.

“You okay?” Freyja asked–her words were a soft rumble. “Sorry if that’s a silly question…”

“Yeah, just…processing…” Alice replied sadly before finally entering in Maura’s password and unlocking the tablet. After a minute, Alice felt himself start to lock up again. What the hell were they getting themselves into? Running from the military? Maura died in the middle of some government conspiracy that transformed a woman into a scaly, mountainous war machine, and Alice was left with no idea of what to do.

“I don’t even know where to start,” Alice admitted numbly. He sniffed and shook his head, “This…this is so beyond us Frey…”

Alice dropped the tablet into his lap and ran his hands through his hair and held his head. He looked down and just set his jaw. Uncertainty started to trickle out of his heart like a compromised dam. Thoughts turned from cohesive to splintered as grief compounded with panic.

He felt a touch against his leg. His thoughts went quiet. Alice looked up and saw Freyja had reached out and had two fingers resting up against his leg.

Alice saw that same look in her eyes again.

“Breathe,” Freyja advised. She gestured out towards the vast Cascadian forest with her other hand while she kept two fingers up against Alice. “Like you said before, we can’t go back to Fort Jeffrey. But we need some kinda lead–something that can point us in the right direction.”

Alice had listened with bated breath. He swallowed and found himself coming down to earth a bit more. He nodded and quickly scooped back up Maura’s tablet–Freyja gently pulled her fingers back now that he resumed his work.

“You’re right,” Alice replied absentmindedly as he attempted to reaccess the encrypted software that he had downloaded per Maura’s request that had presumably activated the Cambrian Engine. “There has to be some papertrail…”

Unsurprisingly, he was locked out of the software as soon as he tried to access it. It was hard to say if this was the work of a manual override from those military goons or if it automatically timed out the user after being inactive for too long. Alice went to one of his stored “combing codes” that he kept on her tablet in the event of an emergency.

“Any luck?”

“Kinda,” Alice replied as he set to work implementing the code. “The software is locked down. It’ll take time to access it, but I have some tools that’ll help us get in…like a crowbar.”

“Hell yeah.” Freyja grinned widely. “I trust you. You know way more about that kinda thing then I do.”

Alice smiled shyly and ducked his head. “Thanks Frey…”

The rain fell against the carport roof as a calming percussion–the wind whistled through the sides of the carport that Freyja was curled up against. In the quiet of the rain, Freyja ran her fingers against the ridges of the carport’s roof then moved to gently feel the supports between her thumb and fingers as if they were delicate toothpicks. She showed remarkable delicacy with how she was handling her newfound size.

Alice was genuinely surprised with how well Freyja was processing everything–she seemed like a child discovering the world for the first time. Alice couldn’t help but feel an overwhelming wash of guilt thinking about how her life had been irreversibly changed…and how maybe if he was just a little bit smarter, he could’ve figured out how to stop it.

“Um…I’m sorry this is all happening to you Freyja…” Alice lamented softly as he ran a thumb over the buttons along the side of the tablet. While it felt like he was just poking a raw wound, the pain still felt comfortable. Familiar, even. He didn’t want to set it aside.

“I wish I could’ve done more to stop this,” Alice murmured, as if not to speak over his own memories of Maura screaming at him to fix it.

Alice shivered when Freyja’s chuckled shook the carport. “Why are you sorry? It’s not like YOU transformed me into–” She gestured to her body “-THIS. But it is what it is, ya’ know? So try not to beat yourself up too hard, okay?”

With a rueful little smile she added, “‘Sides��I was lookin’ for an excuse to get out of the Army anyways.”

“You were?” Alice raised an eyebrow as he tried to get a bit comfier on the couch. The cushions were flat to the point of nonexistence, but he certainly didn’t want to complain to the woman who had to lie on the muddy forest floor because she was too big to fit into a cabin. “That surprises me.”

“Yeah?” Freyja laughed as she rolled onto her back with a heavy thump. “Well…it isn’t as cracked up as I thought it’d be, and I just…”

Freyja breathed quietly as she looked straight up into the thunderstorm unblinking before clearing her throat awkwardly, “...I dunno. After a while, it started to break my heart.”

Freyja sheepishly shrugged as she lay in the mud, “I guess I’m too soft for the military, huh? I’m not cut out to be some heartless officer.”

While only a joke perhaps, Alice felt her words slide through his ribs like a sharp knife. His smile grew cold. “Hey…not all officers are like that. Maura certainly wasn’t heartless.”

“No, but she still was a-” Freyja bit her tongue. From his position, Alice could see her face twist into a look of regret. Alice felt his icy smile melt into a frown as he swiftly picked up on the fact that Freyja might’ve held a vastly different opinion of his Maura.

“She was still a what, Freyja?” Alice asked flatly.

“Nothing!” Freyja clearly lied. “Look, I just…”

She pursed her lips before rolling back over to look at Alice, “I’m sorry. I don’t wanna seem like I’m speaking ill of the dead or anything, but I saw how she grabbed you earlier. You looked scared and uncomfortable, and she looked like she might hurt you. That all just looked very-”

“You didn’t know her,” Alice cut her off. Freyja looked surprised, “You didn’t see how much good there was in her. You’re taking one bad moment out of context–that’s not fair.”

“What about after that?” Freyja demanded. “When SHE clearly screwed up something that made the Engine go off and she shoved that stupid tablet to you as if you were to blame!”

“That-” Alice’s words were caught in his throat. He remembered the seething desperation in Maura’s eyes…it had been a look Alice was unfortunately familiar with. Fort Sill, Hill Air Force Base, Camp Fromann…

Alice shook his head, “You don’t get it. I wanted to help fix things for her. That’s what couples do–they help each other.”

“All I’m saying is that she looked like she wanted to shove blame on you,” Freyja pointed out as she leaned in closer. Her crimson face dominated the space as she leaned in to look in, her fingers curling around one of the carport’s supports. Her voice made the metal shake, and Alice could feel her words in his teeth and in his ribs. Her words were impossible to ignore with such force, but Alice was trying his hardest. “How the hell could you have known what was going on?”

Alice threw his hands up. “I-I could’ve done more!”

Freyja looked confused and went to speak, but Alice cut her off with his protest. “I never, EVER did enough for her! I was always either too sad or too tired or too weak.”

He let his hands fall into his lap, his shoulders slumped. Alice set his jaw and laced his fingers tightly–wishing to God they could be Maura’s and not his own, “A-And now…now I CAN’T. I-I…I can’t do…do anything for…for…”

Alice’s sob came out as a cough as he clutched his head with one hand.

Freyja frowned. She leaned in close, she reached out with a hand and delicately touched the side of her fingers against his leg. “Alice. Hey…breathe. It wasn’t your fault, you-”

“YES! It was!” Alice scooted away from her–her fingers pulled back. “It ALWAYS is!”

He pointed a finger at himself, “She’s dead because of ME! Because I COULDN’T DO MORE! A-And! And now! I’m…I’m…”

Alice’s neck tensed, he set his jaw as he tried to fight off the tears, “I’m…all alone.”

Alice’s mind reeled. He felt so…helpless. Useless. Every plea from Maura to do more, to be more…to put forth the effort, to do his share, to help her when she needed it…

Now Alice had missed his chance.

I’ll do anything for you Maura Sinclair, he had told her

Anything, Ally Cat? Her laughter. Her peck on his forehead. Careful, I might just hold you to that.

FIX THIS, her scream–her plea–of desperation. Was that the last thing Maura had ever said to him? Alice couldn’t remember. All he could hear were the sounds of her screaming.

“I-I can’t do this,” Alice murmured numbly. He gathered up the tablet in his arms.

“Where are you going?” Freyja asked.

“For a walk,” Alice called over his shoulder as he walked back out into the rain. He didn’t hear Freyja move to follow.

Alice’s lungs ached as he followed the giant clawed footprints in the mud back the way they came. It wasn’t much of a path, but at least Alice could follow them back to Freyja and the cabin once he cleared his head.

After he had cleared the tenth or so footprint-shaped crater, he finally allowed himself to cry once more. Alice didn’t care how much it hurt or how lightheaded it made him feel, he just…wept.

Alice cried so hard that his vision started to blurr. Bile crept back up his throat once more as he coughed and sputtered, and even dry heaved. His upper-body locked up as he clutched the tablet to his chest to the point where he started to lose feeling in his fingers. He wasn’t so focused on where he was walking now–though even if he tumbled and fell into one of the footprints, he didn’t care.

The bizarre part was, Alice’s tears weren’t for Maura. They weren’t tears of mourning or grief…not for her, anyway.

Why was he mourning himself?

Shouldn’t he be mourning Maura?

Alice’s sobbing eased only when he realized he wasn’t breathing. Spots flooded his vision as he struggled to catch his breath. His scalp tingled and the only thing he could move was his legs–and even those grew lethargic as his sopping shoes squelched through thick mud. He felt his grip on the tablet grow loose as he struggled just not to pass out. How far had he walked? Was the cabin still in sight? Alice hadn’t the energy to turn around and see.

Soaking to the bone and beginning to shiver, Alice nearly missed the sound of a branch breaking off in the dark treeline.

Alice stopped and felt his shoes sink into place. He looked towards the direction of the noise, but between the tears, rain, and glasses Alice couldn’t see a thing.

Something moved within the forest…

Something big enough that a tree creaked and fell as it was bumped. Alice’s eyes widened as fatigue was promptly replaced with fear. More movement–more branches breaking. This time, they appeared to be falling.

Which meant....

Alice’s blood ran cold as his gaze went up and up…his eyes widening with horror at the sheer scope of what had been waiting silently out in the trees.

“W-What…” Alice murmured.

As Alice looked up into the darkness, something looked back at him.

Alice yelled as a blinding white light sent him reeling. He tried to take a step back, but found his shoes completely stuck in the muck. He flailed and landed flat on his back–the tablet tumbled from his hands and landed not too far away.

“F-FREYJA!” Alice’s scream was lost as hundreds of branches snapped and trees began to topple. As Alice scrambled back through the mud, his eyes tried to adjust to the light that oppressively shone down upon him…

…but all Alice could do was watch in horror as a foot bigger than a tank crashed through the treeline, with a heel aimed to fall upon him.

#g/t #gt #giant/tiny #gt writing #g/t writing #g/t angst #gianttiny #wholesome giantess #ogtoc Freyja #ogtoc Alice #Ozwynn Kaiju!AU #Genesis Day #Kaiju!AU

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