#6x06 just DELIVERED for me

[twogravesinsomecemetery]

Currently explaining How The Ghosts Stole Christmas to my irl friend...

[seraphtrevs]

Do you have any favourite Lalo line deliveries?

Do I ever!

I think the obvious answer is "Tell me again," since it's sort of his catch phrase. And don't get me wrong - it's great. Tony totally nails it - gives me the shivers. But it's a little TOO obvious.

Ditto for "Werner Ziiiiiiiiiegler." Like yes, obviously it's hilarious.

But there are so many more hidden gems, so I'm going talk about those instead. My favorites tend to be when Tony makes a Choice that is so perfectly insane, and so obviously completely his. Like he was taking direction with "tell me again" and "werner ziiiiiiiiegler." These gems are all Tony's.

Two of my favorite line reads are actually from 6x06, which is kind of a minor episode in the grand scheme of things, but both of Lalo's Germany episodes forever changed me. There was me before Lalo created an American alter ego, flirted with a hot German widow, then did NOT sleep with her (his immediate "of course" when she reluctantly turns him away, obviously hoping for him to try harder, is an honorable mention top line read), then broke into her house, then petted her little doggy, then spared her life, then crawled out the window and flew away to go chop a guy's foot off. And then there's the me after (like the me before but more insane).

Anyway, my top Tony line read is when approaches Casper, saying hello to him in German, and then Casper responds in German, and then Lalo says "I don't speak German." Like, the more obvious way to say that line would be apologetic - like it could could be sinisterly apologetic, like when a super villain traps the hero in a room full of snakes and apologizes for the poor accommodations.

Instead, Tony delivers the line like Regina George bullying some hapless freshman. And that is such a Regina move! Manipulate someone into saying something and then immediately use it to belittle them. But like - they're in Germany! It's perfectly reasonable for someone in Germany to assume a person speaking German to them can speak at least little German. But Lalo's like "ew, like I'd ever speak German 🙄" He looks so cunty too.

And then he doesn't really chase Casper, he just kind of casually strolls after him, holding his hand out weird like his arthritis is bothering him. It's all so bonkers and I love it so much.

And coming in second place is "Carajo! I think you broke one of my ribs!" Again, I think the obvious way to read that line would be angry, but instead he sounds more annoyed. And poor Casper the unfriendly soon-to-be ghost is rolling around on the ground, having just had his foot chopped off, and Lalo's whining about how one of his ribs might be broken, and his voice does that weird yelp at the end of rIBS!

And then he takes off his belt with one hand. That's not a line read but I still think about it a lot.

I could go on, and maybe I will later. Basically all Tony line reads are my favorite lol.

[come-rain-come-shine]

What are your top 5 Chenford scenes ever?

I assume this is retribution for my angst spiral posts after 6x06 that had Sarah threatening me with a lawsuit for emotional damages …

This was HARD, people. I could write twenty different versions of this list, and I would stand by each of them. I decided to aim for scenes that I consider to be unique to Chenford or scenes that just make me want to melt.

In no particular order:

Dance at Nyla's wedding (4x18). This entire scene makes me scream. The fake casual way Tim asks Lucy to dance? The way she sassily accepts? The adorkable little hand raise????? And that's all before they have the most romantic work conversation I have ever WITNESSED. "You deserve to be recognized" WHAT STOP IT!!!! His soft, half-hooded eyes as he says this line just about sends me, every time. And the way that Lucy's eyes flicker to Tim's lips a couple times … Srsly just shoot me out of a cannon: I'm done. The sheer joy on both their faces as they dance and have fun together makes me so happy.

Audiobook scene (2x02). I adore the way that Lucy makes Tim feel seen and appreciated just the way he is in this scene. I love Lucy's luminous eyes and hair as she reassures Tim that his difference is what makes him great at his job. And I am more than a little obsessed with Tim's face journey as he realizes that Lucy understands him and has painstakingly made something so thoughtful to help him. Every now and then, I am walking around, minding my own business, and then I am once again hit with the force of Lucy's amazingly sweet gesture and am rendered immobile. This is what love is, folks.

Kojo birthday card (6x08). Come to think of it, this one is sort of in a similar vein to the scene with the audiobook, in that it's a gift that demonstrates that Tim understands and loves Lucy and wants to do something to show her that. This adorable card — signed, sealed, and delivered by Kojo — is exactly what Lucy needs to remind her that Tim cares. It's an affectionate gesture that respects Lucy's need for space from Tim and lets her see her favourite King of Canines. I was so not prepared for this to be the birthday gift Tim settled on for her, and it truly just about bowled me over with the thoughtfulness of it. And then Tim's devastated face that screams regret over not being able to celebrate with her in person UGH. This scene is one for the books.

Second first date (5x10). I love that their second attempt at a date is so dressed down and probably reminiscent of the hundreds of meals they've shared while on shift, getting to know each other and falling in love. I love the dreamy fairy lights strung up overhead. I love the casual way that Lucy mentions their grandkids, and the half-laugh at her own audacity, and her bold refusal to walk back her words. I love the way Tim's eyes sparkle as he smiles at how his whole future is wide open now, and it's with Lucy. I love all that. But I would choose this scene for their first real kiss alone! Every time I watch this kiss, I am in danger of melting. This kiss is slow but sure. Firm but soft. It's so devastatingly romantic. I LOVE IT.

"You're nothing like him" hug (4x09). I love this scene because it shows how deep Tim and Lucy's bond is. She accompanies him to confront his abusive father for the last time. He trusts that she will support him as he completely crumbles in her arms. He seeks her absolution as he asserts that he is nothing like the wretched man he just left behind. She embraces him wholeheartedly and tells him exactly what he needs to hear, comforting him as he comforted her not that long ago when her dear friend died. Like. What a bond. What a moment. Take me out of the oven: I'm done.

Bonus: double date (4x12). This is the first episode of The Rookie I ever watched in full. After having my curiosity piqued by someone I follow on Tumblr, I watched a compilation of Chenford moments on YouTube (as one does). And then I watched more videos. And I just could not get past the idea that these two went on a double date that felt like more of a private date with a third and fourth wheel: I had to see it for myself in full. So I went and watched this episode, and the rest is history. This episode has a very special place in my heart, and I felt my list would be remiss without it. Throughout the whole dinner, I am obsessed with their married energy (Lucy taking food off Tim's plate? Tim jumping to tell an embarrassing story about Lucy that she immediately joins him in telling? Please stop). Just such a great example of their unstoppable chemistry.

Thanks so much for the ask!

[thepirateandhisson]

— Once Upon a Time, 6x06 “Dark Waters”

AKA the one where the writers test how many times they can have others perceive Killian & Henry as father/son in a 44 minute time span.

[sotangledupinit]

Rumpelstiltskin, who hates Captain Hook with a passion and still blames him for Milah dying, whose son is Baelfire aka Neal Cassidy who is the biological father of Henry Mills....

...saying this about Killian Jones and Henry.

We love to see it.

[winterscaptain]

a real hero.

Aaron Hotchner x Gender Neutral Reader

a/n: so about five of you asked about 6x06, devil’s night, when jack dresses up as his dad for halloween. when y’all make the call, i deliver! here’s just over a thousand words of total fluff, thrown together in about an hour (please forgive my errors and tell me what you think!). this stands alone, but i’m throwing it in the ajf pile for good measure, as well!

words: 1.2k warnings: language

summary: “we're taught to expect unconditional love from our parents, but i think it is more the gift our children give us. it's they who love us helplessly, no matter what or who we are.” ― kathryn harrison, the kiss

masterlist | a joyful future masterlist | ajf faq | requests closed!

“..today it rivals only Christmas in terms of popularity.” Spencer and Emily come into the round table room, and you suppress a smile. 

If you know anything about Spencer, it’s that his love for Halloween knows no bounds. 

Emily sits down next to you, explaining, “All I asked was what he was planning to do this weekend.” 

You hide your laugh in your file, looking at Hotch over the top of the folder. There’s the smallest pull in the corner, the threat of a dimple. He looks up at you, and the dimple appears for just a split second before disappearing again. 

+++

Aaron’s anxious as you all wait for the go-ahead from air traffic control. He keeps checking his watch, and his leg bounces under the table. You’re the only two still in the cabin, the others took two other cars and are apparently taking their damn time to arrive from the precinct. 

You throw a Hershey’s kiss at him. He jumps and looks over at you. 

“What’s wrong?”

He sighs. “I’ve never missed a Halloween with Jack. I’m just nervous we aren’t going to make it back in time, is all.” 

You offer him a little smile. “You’ll make it back.” 

Just then, his phone rings and he answers it. “Hotchner.” A smile breaks across his face. “Oh hi, bud. Yeah. We’re almost in the air...Just a couple more hours...What?” He looks at you, and you furrow your brow. “...Let me ask.” 

He covers the mic. “I’d imagine people in their twenties have better ways to spend Halloween than with an over-excited five-year-old and his boring dad, right?”

You snort. “Hell no. I’m in.” 

And it was true - you didn’t have anywhere else better to be, and the lights in your house were already dark and had plans to stay that way to deter trick-or-treaters. There was no better way, in your opinion, than to spend Halloween with an overexcited five-year-old and his (allegedly) boring dad.

He shakes his head with a little smile and returns the phone to his ear. “Yeah, bud. We’re on for the three of us.”

+++

You sit on the floor of Jack’s bedroom, having been dragged in by two of your fingers immediately upon entering the apartment. He told his dad to wait in the dining room and closed the door behind him, so you imagine he has some serious business to discuss with you. 

“I don’t want to be Spiderman.” 

Your brow pinches. “Why not, bud?”

“The costume’s itchy and he’s not a real hero.” 

You hum, thinking. “Are there any real heroes you want to be, or do we want to toss out the hero idea entirely?”

He considers the options carefully, the pinch of his mouth starkly reminiscent of Haley. “I think I want to still be a hero.” 

“Okay. Do you want to come up with some ideas? We still have a little bit of time.”

A little bit of time was pushing it - Aaron wanted to get going before it got too dark out, giving them time for a movie before bed after Jack acquired his haul in the neighborhood. 

An idea comes to him, lighting up his face. “Can you get one of Dad’s ties? They’re…” he looks up, remembering, “...hung up on the front of the bathroom door in his room or inside the closet by the light switch.” 

“Of course.” You kiss his head, shutting the door behind you. You sneak down the hall and open Aaron’s door, trying to be as quiet as possible. 

“You know,” comes a voice from the dining room, “I can hear you?”

You throw your head around the door frame. “No, you can’t!” ...And shut the door behind you.

In Aaron’s room, you find the little hanging tree with all his ties, finding one of the red ones he wears all the time and one of which he has about five near-identical versions, just in case something happened out in the wild. 

You have half an idea of what Jack’s planning, but your only job right now is to follow instructions.

You throw the tie over your shoulder and make a play at sneaking back into Jack’s room while Aaron’s amused huff chases you down the hall. 

Closing the door behind you again, you told up your prize. “I got it.” 

Jack turns around, wearing the suit he got for Haley’s service. It’s only a little small on him, but he’ll probably lose the jacket anyway, working up a sweat even in the chilly Fairfax fall. “I’m gonna be Dad.” 

A little smile pulls at you, and for some reason, there’s part of you that wants to cry a little. Nevertheless, you pull it together quickly, kneeling in front of him to tie the tie. “I think that’s a great idea.” 

Jack puts his little hands over yours. “Can I try it?”

“Mhmm.” You put your hands in your lap, watching him fruitlessly tie knots, trying to get that crisp line Aaron manages every morning. When he gets a little frustrated, you ask, “Do you want some help?”

He nods, looking up and away as you undo his handiwork, giving him a four-in-hand knot that won’t eat him alive. You tighten it just enough to tuck under his collar, smoothing his jacket and fixing the ducktail sticking out of his shirt. 

“Ready?”

He nods, and you open the door. Jack tucks behind your legs. “Dad, don’t look at me!” 

Aaron, ever faithful, has his back turned right where you both left him in the dining room. “I’m not looking! Are you almost ready? ...Need any help?”

You nod at Jack, and he goes into the hallway. “No.”

“Okay.” 

You keep your distance, leaning up against a free spot on the photo wall as Jack steps into the dining room. 

“Whoa,” Aaron says, clearly surprised. “That is definitely not Spiderman.” He looks at you, but you don’t give anything away, a little smile on your face. 

“He’s not a real superhero,” Jack explains. 

“He’s not?” Aaron looks entirely the part of the confused father at the moment, arms crossed, eyebrows raised, a questionable orange-ish sweater. It almost makes you laugh. “Okay. I give up. Who are you supposed to be?”

You can hear the grin in Jack’s voice. “I’m you, Daddy.” 

Aaron’s face softens and he walks over to his son, embracing him before picking him up. He looks at you over Jack’s shoulder. “Was this your idea?”

You shake your head. “All him. I only filched the props.” 

Aaron shakes his head with a little smile you can’t read. Redirecting, he grabs his keys and his wallet with one hand, shoving them in his pocket. “Let’s go get some candy, my little G-Man.”

You grab your coat and Aaron’s from the coat tree, the bucket for Jack’s goods, and follow the boys out the door. You lock the door behind you, finding both of them waiting for you at the end of the apartment hall.

There’s no thought to what the other twenty-somethings are doing tonight. 

Nothing could be better than this. 

+++

tagging: @arganfics @quillvine @stxrryspencer @agenthotchner @hurricanejjareau @ughitsbaby @rousethemouse @criminalsmarts @shrimpyblog @genevievedarcygranger @ssaic-jareau @good-heavens-chris-evans @davidrossi-ismydad @angelsbabey @writefasttalkevenfaster @venusbarnes @hotchsflower @ogmilkis @marvels-agents100 @hotchslatte @risenfox @mrs-dr-reid @captain-christopher-pike @dwellingsofrosie @pan-pride-12 @sunshine-em @word-scribbless​ @jdougl-love​ @sageellsworth05​ @dreila03 @forgottenword @aaronhotchnerr @ssa-morgan @buckybau @sana-li @tegggeeee @abschaffer2 @ssacandice-ray @ellyhotchner @lotties-journey-abroad @mrs-joel-pimentel-23-25 @laneygthememequeen @violentvulgarvolatile  @mooneylupinblack @ssareidbby @violet-amxthyst @bwbatta @roses-and-grasses @lcvischmitt @capricorngf @missdowntonabbey @averyhotchner @mandylove1000 @cevanswhre @qvid-pro-qvo @jeor @spencers-hoodrat @infinity1321 @zizzlekwum @popped-weasels @evee87 @nuvoleincielo @this-broken-band-girl @reidtomestyles @hotch-meeeeeuppppp @winqhster @spencerelds @the-falling-in-the-danger @nattylite49 @crazyshannonigans @softbibxtch @iconicc @mangoberry43

[twdmusicboxmystery]

Communication Theme 2.0 - Specifically, the Mailboxes

Okay, I said I’d talk about the mailboxes this week. Go back and read the Communication Theory if you need a refresher, but here’s a little background on how it all came about.

The gist is that back in 6x03, I started noticing mailboxes. Specifically, in the sequence where Daryl is riding around on his bike looking for Rick. Really, he’s kind of screaming into the radio for Rick to tell him where he is, because he can hear the Wolves attacking Rick and wants to help him. I had no idea what the mailboxes meant, but while he’s riding along, we literally see like a dozen of them, and I didn’t think that could be accidental.

Eventually, someone came up with the idea that mail is a form of communication over long distances, hence the Communication theme. We added other types of communication in, including over a radio or walkie talkie (also a form of communication over distances) and even Morse Code. Reminder, we saw the Morse Code poster behind the music box in 5x16.

Which isn’t really used for communication much in the show (though Maggie did use it in 11x02 to tell them she was beneath the train) but back when humanity’s big goal was to build the first transcontinental railroad, it was used in telegraph offices and the like. (We totally went down a huge telegraph/transcontinental railroad rabbit hole a few years ago. ;D)

The other thing we’ve seen a lot of are mail trucks. Usually the really long, generic kind that carries mail cross country. Interestingly, we’ve seen them several times around Dwight. Once in 6x06, when he was introduced, and again during S8 when AOW was going on. 

Both times, we saw blond, very Beth-ish walkers with head wounds as well, which is why the idea of Beth showing up around Dwight in Fear has persisted so much. I’m sure there’s a reason for those symbols around him, but we aren’t clear on what it is, yet.

So, the short of it is that I’ve grown used to noticing mail boxes, mail trucks, and the like. So, in 11x05, Eugene passes a mail track (in this case, one of the short, fat ones used to deliver residential mail in neighborhoods) pulled by a white horse (a Beth symbol). I didn’t really know what to make of it, and didn’t spend much time on it. I pretty much just wrote it down in my notes and then forgot about it for the rest of the week.

When I was writing up my posts, I saw it and started thinking about it, and everything in conjunction with it, and that’s when it all sort of came together for me.

First off, it occurred to me that we saw this RIGHT before Eugene used the radio to contact Rosita. So if the mail and the radio (both communication forms) are synonymous, that sort of makes sense. It doesn’t explain the white horse, but the mail symbol sort of pointed to or led to the radio symbol. Then I started thinking about the fact that, in this case, the communication (radio signal) was interrupted. And it was probably purposefully interrupted by the CW. So the communication, after a point, was no longer being had. I’ll come back to that.

But the thing is, back in 6x03, Daryl was ALSO on the radio, TRYING TO FIND RICK.

Okay, I need to do a quick refresher on our analyses of the S10 bonus episodes. I’ll try to sum up quickly, but most of this only came about while we were watching the bonus episodes, with an emphasis on Find Me and Diverged.

I’ve always gone back to that 6x03 sequence because it never made any sense. They never told us why Daryl just suddenly, without warning, changed his mind, abandoned his search for Rick, and went back to Sasha and Abraham. It wouldn’t have been difficult to give us a 1-line motivation or thought from him.

After the episode, a fan asked Norman about it and why Daryl left Rick and went back to Sashraham. Norman got very uncomfortable and clearly didn’t really want to answer. He made it seem like he didn’t want to give spoilers, and just said something about how it wasn’t only about Rick. It was more complicated than that. But it was never explained in the show. It’s not like it became clear in subsequent episodes or something. To this day, it’s still a question mark.

So, I knew it was a foreshadow of a future template, but I didn’t understand what for a LONG time. Long story short (haha, not really) we saw a representation of the exact same template in Find Me. Daryl looking for Rick (this time because he thinks he’s probably dead) and he leaves Leah to search for him. Then, seemingly for no reason at all, in the middle of the forest, he changes his mind and goes back to Leah.

In both cases (Leah and Sashraham) they have massive parallels to Beth.

So, the gist is that I think this is a template for something that’s going to happen, probably during the spinoff. I think Daryl will either hear Rick on the radio, or else some news that he might be alive, and go searching for him. Carol will go with him, but they’ll have a falling out soon after and separate. I’m not sure how the Beth stuff will play out, but I think Leah/Sashraham represent her in the template. So, I think we’ll have a situation where Daryl hears something about the CRM, but can’t be bothered with it. He wants to look for Rick. But then something changes his mind (that they really aren’t even giving us hints for in the template) and he stops looking for Rick and goes toward the CRM instead, and THAT is how he’ll finally come face to face with Beth.

In fact, this theme goes ALL the way back to Alone, when Beth asked, “what changed your mind?” That was a foreshadow of something changing his mind in a big way that will make him gravitate away from his search for Rick (which for the record, Leah couldn’t do) and toward Beth.

Okay, so why am I telling you this? Because the communication theme (mailboxes) is present during 6x03. Not so much in 10x18 (cuz random mailboxes out in the middle of the forest would be weird) but he did write Leah the note, much like Beth wrote the thank you note in Alone, and of course the episode was spilling over with other Beth symbolism (spoons, broken pictures, yada, yada).

So, I guess the gist of my mailbox theory is that it (sort of) represents the same thing as the Matrix theory. It just represents the communications aspect of it. I think the mailboxes represent the CRM, and the war, and everything that’s going on around them that TF just isn’t aware of.

Think of it this way: we see Daryl driving by the mailboxes in 6x03. So, he technically sees them, but he doesn’t really register them. He doesn’t focus on them. He’s too busy searching for Rick. It perfectly backs up what I said a few days ago in the Awake/Asleep theme about how Leah was Daryl’s first hint at waking up to the truth, but he rejected it in favor of searching for Rick.

We also have had some weird, one-off communication symbols, such as the balloon Enid and Carl found in S6. It was just so random. It was BLUE. And there was a note, but whatever had been written had faded so they couldn’t read it.

Interrupted communication.

You could also look at it as a lack of communication between members of TF who are in the CRM, and those who are not. We know that Rick, Heath, Beth, and probably Michonne, are somewhere inside the CRM, but there’s been no communication from them, so the rest of TF has no way of knowing where they are or whether they’re even alive.

Lack of communication.

So, what does the white horse and the mail truck represent?

Well, white horse = Beth. And you could argue that, since they’re low on gasoline at this point, the horse pulling the mail truck is what’s making communication by mail possible. So, I think it represents that Beth is the missing link that will restore the communication. Which could be literal (restoring communication between members of TF outside the CRM and inside it), political (opening lines of communication between members of TF and the CRM itself) and also just in terms of “opening their eyes” to the CRM/the Matrix, and what’s actually going on around them. I just picture her motioning frantically toward mailboxes and being like, “Guys! Look! This is what you keep missing!”

And it makes me want to go examine all the mailbox references (haha; not gonna happen anytime soon) because there really have been some interesting ones. Back in 7x01, when Morgan was taking Carol to the Kingdom for medical treatment, he was carving some of his mysterious symbols into them. Still don’t know exactly what to make of that, but Morgan’s group in Fear is much closer to awareness of the CRM than Daryl’s group is. And a bunch of them were taken by Isobel and Al in a black helicopter, so I think we’re nearing the time when Morgan’s group fully meshes with the CRM in some way. I’m sure the mailbox foreshadowed some future arc for Morgan.

So now we have 11x06. Connie and Virgil saw a mailbox, which signaled the house, and then it was down when Kelly’s group passed it. (Lack of communication, perhaps. Here, showing that Kelly didn’t know where Connie was and had no way to contact her. Plus, with the mailbox down, they didn’t surmise, as Virgil had, that there might be a house nearby.)

But also remember that the whole Connie/Virgil sequence in 11x06 is a foreshadow of something to do with Beth. Think of it this way. Virgil first checked the house and pronounced it empty, except for them. But he didn’t know about the cellar and the spaces behind and between the walls. So, he genuinely thought it was safe, but that’s because he couldn’t SEE the danger. Connie could. Or did. She saw it in a way he couldn’t and had to tell him there was a danger there he couldn’t see.

Another way to interpret the fallen mailbox is that if the standing mailboxes represent that the “dream” or Matrix is intact, meaning TF doesn’t know the truth, maybe the fallen mailbox represents them waking up from the dream and finally seeing/understanding the truth. In that case, the fallen mailbox is there solely as a foreshadow of that future arc.

Okay, that’s all I have on the mailboxes. Didn’t I tell you a crap ton of theories were going to come out of this episode? 😉

[unfolded73]

Today and All the Days that Follow (1/1) - schitt’s creek ff

At 8880 words, it’s probably insufficient to call this a 6x14 reaction fic, although it’s that too.  An exploration of relationships, both on the wedding day and in the future. Rated Explicit (ao3)

Other Season 6 reaction fics: 6x01, 6x02, 6x04, 6x06, 6x07, 6x13

NOTES: Thanks to Emily Hampshire for saying in an interview that David and Stevie are soulmates. Thanks to the Rosebudd denizens for speculating how David and Patrick's wedding night might've gone - I think I stole some ideas from you guys. Thanks to my husband for giving me so many ideas for ridiculous sex-adjacent banter. Thanks to Dan Levy for writing this fucking show.

And another thing: This fic does reference the "happy ending" a couple of times in a lighthearted way. It's not a big part of the fic but it is mentioned.

And one more thing: I probably only have to say this because I've written some dark shit in the past, but while it may sound like I've imperiled Patrick's health at one point in this fic, he's fine. Don't worry.

__________________________________________________

9:47 a.m.

Marcy Brewer sipped her tea, giving the waitress Twyla a smile as she gathered up their empty breakfast plates. Twyla met the smile with one of her own at ten times the wattage. “I’m so excited for this evening,” Twyla gushed. “I love weddings.”

���We’re excited too,” Marcy said as Clint pulled out his wallet.

“I mean, I didn’t love my cousin Darryl’s wedding, but to be fair we warned him that saying their vows while skydiving was a bad idea,” Twyla continued.

Marcy met Clint’s eyes and tried to keep her face neutral. “We’re just worried about the rain,” Marcy said, trying to change the subject before she learned more about Darryl’s tragic wedding ceremony.

Twyla looked out the front window of the café and frowned. “Yeah. Let me know if there’s anything I can do to help.”

“We’re just on our way to meet Johnny and Moira now,” Marcy said, “so I guess we’ll find out how much of an issue the weather’s going to be once we speak to them.”

Clint handed a credit card to Twyla and stood up. “I’m going to run to the restroom,” Clint said, patting Marcy’s hand as he left the table.

The door to the café swung open and revealed David fumbling awkwardly with an umbrella before he managed to get it folded and the door closed against the driving wind. He hurried to the counter and spoke in low, urgent tones to Twyla, who gave him a sympathetic nod and made her way over to the espresso machine.

Marcy stood and approached him, concerned by the anxious way he was drumming his fingers on the counter and biting his lip. She hadn’t spent that much time with David in person, but he looked like he was close to a full meltdown.

“David,” she said, a gentle hand on his arm. “Are you okay?”

“The rain has ruined everything,” he said in a small, breathy voice. “We’re going to end up getting married in a barn.”

“Oh, sweetie, I’m sure you won’t have to get married in a barn,” Marcy said, rubbing up and down on his upper arm. He wore a soft sweater with a rainbow heart on the chest, and Marcy’s own heart squeezed at the thought of him choosing to wear that sweater before he changed into his wedding tuxedo.

David laughed humorlessly. “You’d be surprised how many major events in this town have happened in a barn.”

Twyla brought over a coffee cup, handing it to David and handing Clint’s receipt and credit card to Marcy. “Listen, David, I’ll get someone to cover for me today so that I can help with whatever you guys need today. And if Jocelyn hasn’t already done so, I’ll put out the word to everybody to pitch in,” Twyla said.

“Thanks,” David said, “That’s… that’s really nice of you.”

“We love you guys,” Twyla said with another sunny smile. “The least we can do is make sure you have a nice wedding today.”

“See?” Marcy said when Twyla left to deliver someone else’s breakfast. “Everyone’s behind you. It won’t be ruined.”

David nodded, but didn’t look convinced. “I just wanted today to be perfect.”

“Well, weddings are never perfect. Did I ever tell you about how my sister stepped on my train and ripped it about ten minutes before I was supposed to walk down the aisle?”

Shaking his head with wide eyes, David put his hand over his mouth. “What did you do?”

Marcy shrugged. “We pinned it with a couple of safety pins and I got married in a ripped dress. In the end, I was still married to the love of my life at the end of the day. And you can’t really tell in the pictures unless you know what to look for.”

David took a sip of his coffee, and Marcy thought maybe he was shaking a little bit less than he had been when they’d started talking.

“Patrick is the love of my life too, you know,” he said softly.

Marcy put an arm around him, giving him a squeeze. “Oh, David. I knew that the first day we met.”

~~~

2034

“I told Patrick he wasn’t wearing enough sunscreen,” David fretted on the screen of her phone. Marcy could tell by the herky-jerky movement of the camera and the motion of the ceiling above his head that David was pacing the floor.

“David, there’s no need to catastrophize until the biopsy comes back. And even if it’s bad news—”

“Oh, God—”

“Even if it’s bad news,” Marcy said more firmly, “skin cancer is treatable. The odds are very good these days.” She ignored the ball of anxiety in her own stomach, focusing on soothing her son-in-law’s nerves.

“All those baseball games, and hikes… just last month he was outside all weekend helping to set up for the Elm County Pride events.”

Marcy watched David flop down on the sofa and run his hand over his face. “You aren’t going to be able to stop him from doing the things he wants to do, David. Believe me, I had to tell myself that with every trip we made to the emergency room when he was a kid.” There was a droning sound outside, and she looked up in time to see Clint trundle past with the lawnmower. It was a job he insisted on doing himself even though they had plenty of grand-nieces and grand-nephews who would do it for them if they asked. She supposed the reckless apple didn’t fall far from the tree.

A smirk flashed across David’s face. “That arm he broke twice aches sometimes before it rains now.”

Marcy snorted. “He deserves it. He was an idiot when he was a teenager.”

They looked at each other’s faces through their phone screens for several seconds. At fifty, her son’s husband was as handsome as ever, his hair streaked with bits of grey and the lines beside his eyes more prominent. “Also, I’m afraid I’ll be bad at taking care of him,” David said quietly.

“Well, that’s the most ridiculous thing you’ve ever said.”

She startled a laugh out of David with that. “It’s definitely not. Just ask your son.”

“I know you think Patrick is the one who takes care of you, but the thing I’ve learned about you boys over all these years is that you have a knack for not falling apart at the same time. When you need him, Patrick is strong for you. But when Patrick needs you, you’re strong for him.”

She could see the glassiness of tears in David’s eyes. “I hope you’re right, Marcy.”

“Listen to your elders, David,” she said as David’s head whipped around toward something outside the range of the camera. “What is it?”

“He’s on the phone,” David whispered. “It might be the doctor.”

Marcy waited, trying to take her own advice not to worry until there was definitely something to worry about. It almost worked.

Finally, she could hear Patrick’s voice, followed immediately by an expression of relief on David’s face. “Are they sure?”

“Yeah, she said it’s benign, but that I should have it checked in another six months.” Patrick came within view of David’s phone camera. “Hi, Mom,” he said, his eyes darting to David. “David, did you tell her…?”

The image blurred and swooped as David likely was gesticulating with the hand holding it. “I needed someone to talk to about this, honey.”

Patrick sat down next to David and pulled him into his side. Marcy watched as David hugged her son, the camera at an angle, the phone probably forgotten in his hand.

“I’m sorry if you were worried, Mom,” Patrick said as he pulled out of the hug and David rested his head on Patrick’s shoulder.

“You need to tell me about these things, Patrick. I worry more when you don’t talk to me.” It was a well-trod pattern between them, stretching back to when Patrick was a teenager. She didn’t seriously think Patrick would change now, but it felt better to chide him anyway.

“I know,” he said placidly, turning and kissing the top of David’s head.

“Thank you for being there for us, Marcy,” David said.

“Of course.” She swallowed back tears that threatened to spill over. “I love you, my sweet boys.”

~~~

1:39 p.m.

“So,” Stevie said after she and Patrick had his car doors closed, their raincoats dripping onto the seats and floorboards. “Now we just have to break it to David that the wedding is going to be at the Town Hall.”

“Yeah, that’s gonna go well,” Patrick sighed. “But it really is the best option. He’ll see that, right?”

Stevie gave him several exaggerated nods like she was a bobble-head doll. “Sure.”

Sighing again, Patrick started the car.

“I know he’s been really extra about the wedding, but you know it’s only because marrying you is really important to him, right? Like, the most important thing he’s ever done,” Stevie said as they pulled out of the motel parking lot.

“I know,” Patrick replied. “I mean, there have been moments that I was worried that the wedding was more important to him than the marriage, but…” He couldn’t help the smile that came to his face when he thought about their future in this town. “David’s gesture with the house allayed my fears on that count.”

“David likes things to be just right, is all. So his mind kind of obsessively goes over and over and over stuff that matters to him until he has it the way he wants it. Like his wardrobe. Or the store.”

“Yeah.” Patrick took a left turn toward his apartment. “You know my future husband very well.”

After a long pause, Stevie asked, “Can I tell you something and you not take it the wrong way?”

“Well, that’s not at all ominous.”

“I think David is, like, my soulmate. Not romantically!” she added quickly. “Just…our friendship is the most important thing in my life. And maybe it always will be.”

Patrick pulled into his parking space at the apartment and shut off the car. He turned and stared at Stevie, trying to wrap his head around what she’d just said. “I’ll confess I’m struggling with the concept of a non-romantic soulmate.”

“That’s because you’re a disgustingly romantic person. I’m … not that. And look, I know that while David is the most important person in my life, he has you and you’re his person. I get that. And I’m more than okay with it. It’s great, actually. I love you guys together, and I love who David has become being with you.” She looked down at her fingers. “I just wanted you to understand… I don’t know. I’m not saying this right.”

Maybe she wasn’t, but Patrick didn’t have to understand her feelings to support them. After all, he’d never understood how she had just stopped wanting to sleep with David at some point. Patrick couldn’t imagine sleeping with David and then not wanting to do it again and again, forever.

“Stevie, I was already aware that you and David have a special bond. You guys are alike in ways that he and I will never be, and so you probably understand him in ways that I don’t.” He reached over and took her hand in his. “I think that if David hadn’t been your friend first, he and I probably would never have made it here. You made him a better person. I suspect that you still do.”

She snorted. “I’m way too much of a mess to make anyone a better person, but I appreciate that you think so.” She squeezed his hand and let it go. “You’re a close second in the best friend department, you know.”

“I’m honoured,” Patrick said, but then he narrowed his eyes at her. “That’s just because the one thing you can’t do with your best friend David Rose is complain about David Rose, isn’t it?”

Stevie shrugged, laughing. “So what if it is?”

Patrick moved to get out of the car, but then stopped. “I’ve been meaning to say, I assume I have you to thank for David’s change of heart about New York? And the house?”

“He just needed a tiny nudge in the right direction, that’s all. Same as always.”

“Thank you. Seriously.”

“Well, since I’ve once again set your love life on the right path like I always do, I expect payment.”

“How many bottles of wine?” Patrick asked.

“Nope, not that. I have demands about the house. I want to be able to drop by and visit whenever I want. And dinner at least once a week when I’m in town.”

“Should I have an extra key made for you?” Patrick asked, smirking.

“Duh.”

“Okay, but I can’t promise you won’t walk in on something you’ll regret,” he said, finally getting out of the car and hurrying through the rain to the front door of his apartment building.

Stevie was grimacing as she followed him inside. “Fine, I’ll text first.”

~~~

2022

There was a sharp knocking sound on the window pane of the back door, and Patrick looked up from the tax documents spread out on his kitchen table to see Stevie’s face framed through the glass. He gestured for her to come in.

“There’s some coffee left,” he said, his eyes already back on his paperwork.

Stevie went straight for the cabinet where the mugs were, getting one down and filling it with coffee before she came over and looked at what Patrick was doing. “Hmm, looks like you’re working.”

He looked up and blinked balefully at her. “Yes. This tax paperwork is due at the end of the week.”

“Looks like you’re working at home. When you have a perfectly good desk in the back of the store,” she said before sipping her coffee.

“I have a little more space to spread out here,” he said, not meeting her eyes.

“So it has nothing to do with the fact that you and David are having a fight.”

Patrick put his pen down and leaned back in his chair. “Okay, you clearly have already talked to him, so out with it. Tell me what you’re here to tell me. And it’s not a fight, it’s a… minor disagreement.”

“Uh huh.”

“Stevie—”

“It sort of seems to me that you were having a reasonable debate over where the second Rose Apothecary location should be and then the debate experienced some… scope creep.”

Patrick raised an eyebrow. “Scope creep?”

Stevie threw up her hands and groaned. “I’ve been in a lot of meetings with the Rosebud Motel Group leadership team lately, sorry.”

“Ooh, tell me what other business-y buzzwords you’ve learned.”

“Don’t change the subject, Brewer; we’re talking about you and David right now, not my career.” She sat down at the table across from him, shoving some papers out of the way so that she wouldn’t have to set her coffee mug down on top of them.

“So what did David say?” Patrick asked, a bit afraid of the answer.

“Here’s what I think,” Stevie said, not answering the question. “I think that you do a lot in this marriage and around the store because you like being needed. And also you like to take charge and control things. Classic service top behaviour.”

Patrick had thought he was done blushing about his sex life around Stevie; apparently not. “I’m sorry, what?”

She waved a hand dismissively. “David talks to me about stuff, you know that. Anyway, my point is that when you get overwhelmed and need help, you have a hard time just asking for help. Instead you passive aggressively make David feel bad that he isn’t doing more.”

“I’m not being passive aggressive.”

“Patrick, you are totally being passive aggressive. And I’m not saying David doesn’t share some of the blame: he’s got this learned helplessness thing that I assume dates back to early childhood and believe me, I find it as annoying as you do. Maybe more so.” She raised her coffee to her mouth and took a sip. “But if you’re overwhelmed right now, maybe you should try just straightforwardly asking David to help you.”

Patrick pressed the heels of his hands against his eyes. “Fine.” He looked up at her. “For someone who claims to not do relationships, you certainly seem to know a lot about them.”

“When would I have time for a relationship? A significant amount of my free time is taken up by being your and David’s marriage counsellor.” She stood up from the table. “So are you good?”

Sighing, Patrick nodded. “I’m good.”

“Good, because I’ve got a flight to Michigan tonight to visit some of the midwestern motels.” She gave him a little wave and left via the back door.

Patrick picked up his phone and called David.

“Hi,” David answered on the third ring.

“Hey. I’m sorry. Can we talk?”

There was a pause, but Patrick could almost hear David nodding. “We can talk. I love you.”

Patrick was already stacking up his papers to return to their file folders. “I’ll be there in fifteen minutes.” He glanced around the kitchen, frowning. “And hey, can you tell Stevie to stop stealing our coffee mugs? She just took another one.”

David laughed. “It’s not just the coffee mugs. She has some of our dishes and flatware too.”

“Cool,” Patrick deadpanned, rolling his eyes. “And I love you, too.”

~~~

5:05 p.m.

Patrick spotted his father coming in from his reflection in the mirror as Patrick prepared to tie his tie. He dropped the two ends of it and spun around. “Thank god,” he said at the sight of the styrofoam containers in his father’s hands. “I don’t know why it just now occurred to me that I forgot to eat today.”

“Yeah, I can’t imagine,” his father said with a smirk. “Could there possibly be something else on your mind?”

They sat together at the small desk in the town hall back room where they’d sequestered themselves to change for the wedding. Patrick’s mother was with the other relatives who had made the trip into town, texting frequent updates about his extended family’s shenanigans.

“Oh, I double checked with Stevie. She has the wedding rings,” Clint said as he tucked a napkin into his collar to protect his tuxedo shirt.

“Is she absolutely sure?” Patrick copied his father’s actions with his own napkin, imagining that if he managed to get mustard on his wedding shirt, David might change his mind about getting married. Finally, he dug into his food.

“She said she texted you a picture as proof,” Clint said with an amused smile. Patrick pulled out his phone while he chewed and sure enough, there were three pictures from Stevie in his messages: one close-up of the open ring box with two wide, gold bands in it, one selfie of her putting the box in the jacket pocket of her suit, and one of her flipping off the camera. He grinned and put the phone away. “Yeah, she has them.”

“She seems like an excellent maid of honour for David,” Patrick’s father mumbled around a mouthful of burger.

Thinking about Stevie’s delight at the happy ending mishap a couple of hours ago, Patrick chuckled and took another bite of his burger. “Yeah.”

“These burgers aren’t very good,” Clint admitted.

Patrick put his down. He’d managed to take three bites out of it, but the butterflies in his stomach were making it challenging to choke down any more of the food he’d wanted so badly a few minutes ago.

“Yeah, they’re never very good.”

“And yet you eat there frequently?”

Patrick shrugged. “It’s next to the store.” He pushed away from the table. “I think I’m too nervous to eat.”

Clint put a hand on Patrick’s shoulder. “I’m so proud of you, son.”

“For what, going through with getting married this time?” Patrick joked, uncomfortable with his father getting emotional right now. He felt like his own emotions were way too close to the surface as it was.

“For realizing that things in your life weren’t right, and for having the courage to go out and find what you needed to be happy.”

“It didn’t feel like courage. It felt like running away.”

Clint threaded his fingers together and fidgeted with his thumbs, a nervous tic that Patrick had picked up from his father when he was a kid. “Your mother and I probably didn’t make it any easier on you those first few months, pressuring you to come home.”

“You don’t need to apologize for that,” Patrick said quickly. Maybe there were other things they needed to apologize for, but wanting him to come home when he couldn’t articulate why he’d left, that wasn’t something he could lay at their feet. “I wish I’d been brave enough to tell you about David from the start. You could have gotten to know him a lot better by now if I’d just—”

“Patrick, no.”

“It’s true.”

“We’ll have years to get to know him. Thanksgivings and Christmases and maybe some summer trips to the lake house, okay?”

Patrick let out a slow breath. “Yeah. You’re right.”

Clint pushed himself up from his chair, pulling the napkin from his collar. “Then let’s get you ready to get married, shall we?”

~~~

2021

“So are you ready for the official tour?” Patrick asked his parents after setting their luggage in the front room of the house.

“We saw the house when we were here for the wedding, remember?” Clint said with an indulgent smile.

“That doesn’t count; they hadn’t moved in yet,” Marcy said. “Now they’re settled in and we get to see it as Patrick and David’s house.” She looked around. “Is David not here?”

“He’s at the store, but he should be home in a half hour,” Patrick said. “Come on, I’ll show you around.”

He took them through the living room — where David had recently hung a piece of Japanese art above the fireplace, the mantle already crowded with pictures from their wedding; where a cozy sofa was angled toward the television Patrick had spent a frustrating Sunday mounting on the wall — to the kitchen. In the morning, the kitchen was Patrick’s favorite part of the house, sunlight streaming in through the south-facing windows as he boiled water for tea and ground coffee beans for David’s French press. One end of the counter tended to collect the detritus of their lives — junk mail, loose pens, change from their pockets, and David’s keys when he forgot to put them in the bowl by the front door. The cabinets were gradually filling up as they acquired more small appliances and salad bowls, crystal wine glasses and those proper pint glasses Patrick had always wanted.

“We’re going to paint in here next year,” Patrick explained. “I’d like to teach myself to tile so that I can replace the backsplash at the same time.”

“I could come out and help, if you want,” his dad offered.

“Sure, that would be great.”

He pointed out the dining room and then led them to the one downstairs bedroom, which was doubling as an office and guest room. “You’ll be in here,” Patrick said. “I promise the sofa bed is comfortable. Or Stevie says it is, anyway. She sleeps in here when she’s had too much to drink to drive home.”

“I’m sure it will be fine, sweetie,” his mom said. “The walls are an interesting color,” she commented, pointing out the deep plum walls.

“Oh yeah, David painted this room. I didn’t think I’d like it, but it kind of works.” He led them out and up the creaking wooden stairs to the second floor of the house where the other two bedrooms were. Stopping in the doorway of the master bedroom, Patrick said, “This is our bedroom, obviously.” He moved on quickly. Even now that he was married to David, he still felt weird about his parents seeing the bed they shared. The couple of times they visited him in his apartment, he’d felt the presence of his bed in the space like it was looming over them, daring his parents to picture him in it with David.

“The bathroom up here is nicer than the one downstairs, so you’re welcome to come up and use this one,” he said, indicating the room in question. “I’d like to redo the tile in here too at some point, if I can find the time.”

He started toward the stairs, but his mother hung back. “Are those both closets?” she said, pointing to the other closed doors.

Patrick chuckled. “In a manner of speaking. One is the linen closet, one is the third bedroom that David uses as a closet. I don’t think he’d forgive me if I showed you that.”

His parents laughed and shook their heads and followed him down the stairs and into the kitchen, where he poured them wine and set the oven to preheat so that he could bake the lasagna he and David had put together the night before. Then he pulled out ingredients for a salad.

“The house is lovely,” his mom said. “You’ve made a real home here, and it’s wonderful to see.”

“Have you decided what to do with that big yard yet?” Clint asked.

Patrick shook his head. “I’d like to try my hand at gardening, but I’m worried I won’t have the time to keep it up.”

David arrived home then in a flurry of hugs for his in-laws and a kiss on the cheek for Patrick, and in less than ten minutes he and Marcy were deep in conversation over the latest true crime documentary on Netflix. His father pulled a second knife from the block and went to work on the cucumbers while Patrick peeled carrots.

“This is what I always wanted for you, you know,” Clint said softly as they worked on the salad.

Patrick looked over at David. His excitement in making whatever point he was making to a giggling Marcy showed in his high-pitched voice and his broad hand gestures. Turning back to his father, Patrick raised a skeptical eyebrow. He was pretty sure this wasn’t at all what his father had pictured for him when he was young, and Patrick couldn’t help a tiny nugget of resentment from surfacing in his stomach for his father trying to rewrite their history.

“Okay, I didn’t know I wanted this, specifically,” Clint acknowledged. “I just… I wanted you to have a home of your own, is all. A place to settle down and be happy. That’s what I mean. And that’s what you have.”

Patrick smiled. “Yeah. That’s exactly what I have.”

~~~

5:41 p.m.

“Wow.” Stevie said when he emerged from the bathroom of the motel room.

David dismissed her reaction with a flutter of his hand. “You were with me at the fitting.”

“Yeah, but it hadn’t been fit yet so I didn’t get the full effect.” She eyeballed him up and down. “It’s really sexy, actually. Patrick’s gonna flip.”

David looked down at himself in his wedding clothes. He’d had them shorten the skirt so that the front panel hit him right at the knees, and then he’d been nervous that he’d made a terrible mistake. “Are you sure? It’s not too funky?” he joked, harkening back to the opinion about his clothes that Stevie had expressed years ago.

“No, I actually love it.” She took a sip of her champagne. “And you know I wouldn’t say that if I didn’t mean it.”

Going over to the mirror, David began fussing with his hair, making sure every strand was in place. The rest of his wedding might have been ruined, but at the very least he could look perfect.

“Are you nervous?”

He thought about it, probing his feelings. He was excited about saying his vows to Patrick and slipping a wedding ring onto his finger. He was feeling queasy that his vision for the outdoor wedding of his dreams had to be tossed aside because of the weather. But was he nervous? “Not at the moment, but ask me again right before I walk down the aisle.” He huffed. “If they even manage to have an aisle in that place. As I walk between Bob and Ronnie’s desks, I guess.”

Stevie grinned at him. “I went over and took a look at Town Hall while you were getting dressed. You might be surprised when you see it.”

He rolled his eyes, trying not to get his hopes up. “Whatever.”

The door between the motel rooms opened then and Johnny strode in, his bow tie dangling from his collar but otherwise he was dressed and ready to go. “Oh, Stevie, don’t you look lovely!” he said with a big smile before turning to take David in. “And David—”

“Yes, this is what I’m wearing, so don’t start,” David snapped, trying to head off any comments his father might make about the style of his wedding attire. Johnny Rose tolerated, even liked, all manner of fashion from his wife, but that tolerance hadn’t always extended to his son’s sartorial choices. Johnny might have accepted his sexual orientation a long time ago, but he occasionally had some old-fashioned ideas when it came to gender expression.

Johnny blinked, a spark of hurt in his eyes. “David, I think you look wonderful.”

David’s teeth clicked together in surprise. “Thanks.”

“And when I think about..” Johnny paused, and swallowed, and David could see the glassiness of unshed tears in his eyes. “When I think about how much you went through, and that now you’ve found someone to love you and share your life with…”

“Dad, you can’t do this right now; if you start crying, then I’m going to start crying, and then my eyes will be puffy in the wedding pictures and I’ll blame you for it.”

“Mr. Rose, maybe you could go check and see if Mrs. Rose is ready to drive over to Town Hall?” Stevie said gently, putting an arm around him and ushering him back to the door.

“That’s a good idea, Stevie — thank you.” He gave David one more watery smile before he closed the door behind him.

“Thanks,” David breathed. “I’m touched by how much he cares, but I can’t handle that level of emotion right now.”

Stevie nodded. “Then it’s a good thing you’ve got me, because I’m not capable of that level of emotion.”

David smirked at her. “Right.”

“Although for the record, I do love you a lot, and I’m really happy and honoured that I get to stand beside you while you marry the love of your life today.”

His eyes filled up with tears that immediately spilled over onto his cheeks. “Oh, fuck you.” He wiped under his eyes. “You did that on purpose.”

Stevie grinned. “Yes, I did. But also, it’s the truth.”

“I know.” David sniffled. “I love you, too.”

~~~

2029

When Stevie finally showed up on his doorstep the week before Christmas, David pulled her into a hug and almost started crying.

“I haven’t seen you in months,” he scolded her, his eyes squeezing shut as he rocked them back and forth.

“I know, I know, I didn’t know I’d have to be at corporate so much this year.” She slapped his arm. “Are you going to let me in anytime soon? I’m freezing.”

“Sorry, sorry,” he said, stepping back and letting her into the house. Stevie pulled her boots off and left them by the door, hanging her coat and scarf up before following David into the kitchen where he put a glass of wine into her hand.

“So, Dad being a hundred percent retired has been tough, huh?”

“I really didn’t realize how much work he did,” Stevie said, flopping into a chair. “So many meetings. Resolving conflicts between people with enormous egos. Making a thousand decisions every day, all the while convinced someone is going to point out what a huge fraud I am.”

“Oh my god, don’t talk about my best friend like that. You aren’t a fraud.”

“So what’s going on with the move to Elmdale, is that still happening?”

David felt his familiar anxiety arising at the mention of that topic. “We’ve looked at, like, a hundred houses. Some of them are very nice and two were within walking distance of my favorite pizza place and that new wine bar that opened up last year.”

Stevie squinted at him. “And therefore within walking distance of your Rose Apothecary location in Elmdale.”

He waved his hand dismissively. “Yes, and that. Our biggest location, and the one that arguably requires most of our attention these days.”

“So what’s the problem?”

“There is every logical reason to move.”

“So what’s the problem?”

“The problem is I love this house!” He said, gesturing around at his warm kitchen. “I love it. We’ve done so much work on it over the years, and I just… I hate the idea of some other family buying it and moving in and living inside these walls that are ours.”

“You’ve always complained that it’s too small,” Stevie pointed out.

“I know. It is.”

“What does Patrick think?”

“He thinks I’m being overly sentimental, but he’s willing to stay in this house if that’s what I want. Of course. Because that’s what my husband does.”

“Maybe you haven’t found a house you like enough to replace this one, but that doesn’t mean that house doesn’t exist,” Stevie said. “Maybe you should keep looking.”

“Maybe.” He waved his hand as if to dismiss that topic of conversation into the ether. “Anyway, I read that profile of you in Entrepreneur Magazine.”

Stevie rolled her eyes. “Would you believe that stupid magazine profile got me laid, like, multiple times?”

“I used to live in New York. Of course I believe that.”

“Like, so much dick, David.”

“Okay, I get it.” He sipped his wine and debated whether to ask the question that was plaguing him. “Any, um, special dicks in the bunch?”

Stevie narrowed her eyes. “Is that your way of asking if there’s anyone special in my life?”

“Maybe.”

“There isn’t. I mean, there’s guys that I’ve seen more than once, but if you’re asking if I’ve caught feelings for anyone, the answer is no.”

“Hmm.” He heaved a sigh and decided to bite the bullet. “So are you gonna… stay in New York?”

Smiling like she could see right through him, Stevie said, “Actually, one of the things I’ve been doing this week is sitting in on interviews for a new Chief Operating Officer. Because I want to come home.”

David’s heart stuttered in his chest, but he schooled his expression to one of skepticism. “You’re a high-powered business woman and you’ve spent the last few months in one of the most exciting cities in the world, getting wined and dined and eaten out by a parade of randoms, and you want to come back to Schitt’s Creek.”

She nodded. “That’s right.”

“Why?”

“I miss the futility of Bumpkin.”

“Stevie, why?”

“Because I missed my friends, you dumb ass.” She swirled her wine. “You in particular.”

David suppressed a smile. “I love you.”

“Love you, too. Dumb ass.”

~~~

9:42 p.m.

He dodged Alexis’ wobbly nose boop. His nose had been booped by her enough for one day.

“Daaavid. You’re married,” she said, swaying in front of him, a champagne flute clutched in her hand.

“I know, I haven’t forgotten the ceremony. And if I had, you’ve told me that four times already tonight.”

“Yeah, but I just keep thinking about how lonely you were before. Not just when we first got here, but also in New York.”

“Mm hmm, thanks, I appreciate you bringing that up,” he said with an eye roll.

Alexis ignored him. “I mean, there were always people around you, but you were really lonely. And now look.” She gestured around the room. Ronnie and some of the Jazzagals were in a loose circle on the dance floor, dancing and singing along too loudly to Crazy in Love. His father and Patrick’s father were talking at one of the tables, laughing about something. Stevie and his mother (having made a complete costume change after the ceremony) were doing shots at the bar while his new husband and mother-in-law were watching with amusement. “You have all of these people in your life who love you.”

David nodded, too overcome for the moment to speak. They both watched the reception in silence for a minute.

“Do you think Mom and Dad are going to be okay without us?” Alexis asked.

“They have each other, and they’ve always been the most important person in each other’s lives. They’ll be fine.”

“Do you think we’re going to be okay without Mom and Dad?”

“Yes, I do. Well, you will be, because you’re you. And I have Patrick, so…”

Alexis nodded. “Do you think we’re going to be okay without each other?”

“I think you better call me all the fucking time,” David said, putting his arm around her. Alexis wrapped both of her arms around his waist and squeezed.

~~~

2025

“I still can’t get used to you cooking,” Alexis commented from the tablet screen that David had propped up on the kitchen counter so that he could use both of his hands to finely chop the cilantro that had come out of their garden.

“You literally saw me cooking when you were here last Thanksgiving,” he said, the chef’s knife in his hand making a dangerous arc through the air as he made his point.

“I know, and I still can’t get used to it.”

“Patrick and I wouldn’t still be married if I hadn’t taken on a larger share of the housework, and it turns out, despite all past evidence to the contrary, that I’m good at this. Okay?”

“Okay, David, god. Lighten up.”

“So anyway, you were telling me about Mom and Dad,” he reminded her.

“Yeah, she says she’s really done with Los Angeles for good this time, and that they’re staying here in New York for the foreseeable future.” Alexis was fiddling with her hair. “We’ll see.”

“That’s a relief, honestly. I feel better knowing you’re close by to check in on them more frequently. They aren’t getting any younger.”

“When are you guys visiting New York again?”

David scraped the cilantro into his bowl of chopped tomatoes and grabbed a lime, slicing it in half. “August, I hope. What’s going on with that guy you were seeing? What was his name? Larry?”

“Ew, David. Can you see me dating a guy named Larry? It’s Leonard.”

“Uh huh, that’s much cooler,” he smirked. “Are you still seeing him?”

“Yeah, but I don’t know if it’s serious. I don’t know if I have time for something serious.”

“You work too hard.”

“So do you.”

David sighed, debating internally whether to tell her the news.

“What?” Alexis asked, her eyes narrowed. “You’re keeping something from me.”

Setting his knife down, David looked into the camera. “Ted’s back in town.”

She started fidgeting with her hair again. “Oh yeah? What brings Ted to town?”

“His mother is sick and he’s here to help her get to and from her chemotherapy appointments. At least that’s what Jocelyn said. She said he might even reopen his vet practice, but that might just be the Schitt’s Creek rumour mill on overdrive.”

“I should maybe send Mrs. Mullens a card, right? Should I send her a card?” Alexis asked in a small voice.

“I’m sure she would appreciate a card.” He cleared his throat. “If I see Ted, do you want me to—”

“No. I don’t know. Just… tell him I said ‘hey.’ And that I hope his mom is okay.”

“I’ll do that.” David felt a swell of affection for his little sister. “You know, the guest room here is yours anytime you want to visit.”

Alexis nodded up and down several times. “Yeah. I’ll… yeah. Let me check my calendar and I’ll get back to you. I mean, I know you miss me, so…”

He smiled. “I do miss you, Alexis.”

~~~

12:29 a.m.

“Do you want to dance some more?” Patrick asked, nuzzling against the side of David’s neck as they sat at one of the reception tables.

“We can if you want,” David said. Stevie, Alexis, and Twyla all seemed to just be getting their second wind, gyrating together on the dance floor to “Umbrella.”

“My feet are kind of killing me, actually,” Patrick admitted. “And as you once told me, sock feet in a public place is incorrect.”

David looked down at the boots he had paired with his Thom Browne tuxedo, which were still really comfortable after several hours on his feet. “Then we don’t need to dance. We did plenty of dancing tonight.”

“Do you want more cake?” Patrick asked.

“I might explode if I eat more cake.”

“A tragic and disgusting end to a very short marriage,” Patrick said seriously, his lips quirking up on one side in a tiny smile.

“Ha ha.”

Patrick sat up a little straighter then and waggled his faint eyebrows in a spoof of lasciviousness. “Do you wanna come back to my place?”

“Mm, I would, but I’m married,” David said, trying to suppress a grin.

Laughing, Patrick leaned closer. “Oh, but I’ve heard your husband is pretty liberated about stuff like that.”

David bit his lip. “Only in special cases, like when he hires a sex worker for me. Also, he has a weakness for attractive carpenters who are up for a threesome.”

Patrick looked around, a smirk still firmly planted on his face. “Are there any attractive carpenters here?”

“You know, I would’ve invited Jake? But I didn’t want to find my maid of honour hooking up with him in a closet before we managed to pose for pictures.”

Patrick’s eyelashes fluttered as he looked back and forth between David’s eyes and his mouth. “Seriously, though. We outlasted all of our parents at this party, and the newly married couple does traditionally leave first. We can go whenever you’re ready.”

“I think my parents are out back sharing a joint with Roland and Jocelyn, frighteningly enough, but I take your point. Let’s go home.” Home right now was still the apartment, but next month it would be the new house, which David was almost as excited about as he had been about the wedding.

A swish of white in David’s peripheral vision caught his eye, and he looked up to see Alexis, Twyla, and Stevie. Twyla had an entire bottle of champagne in one fist. “We’re taking this party back to the motel. Wanna come?”

He looked at Patrick, torn between his precious remaining time with his sister before she left for New York, and being alone with his husband. Patrick, as he often could, read David’s mind. “Yeah, let’s go party at the motel.”

Anyone awake and paying attention would have seen the five of them stumbling down the road at a quarter to one in the morning in formalwear, David unable to stop himself from laughing loudly at the ridiculous rendition of “Shallow” that Patrick and Twyla were singing while they walked. As they approached the motel, Patrick took a moment to whisper something in Stevie’s ear. David watched with curiosity as Stevie ducked into the office when they arrived, emerging after a few seconds and pressing something into Patrick’s hand. Before David could follow Alexis into their room, Patrick grabbed his hand and dragged him down the walkway to the room at the end of the row.

“What are we doing?”

“Just taking a tiny detour before we go party with your sister,” Patrick said, unlocking the love room.

“This is a nightmare room, though. Also I fucked Stevie in here.”

“Yeah, like three years ago. I think I can handle it,” Patrick deadpanned as he closed the door and pushed David up against it.

“They’re going to know what we’re doing.”

“Oh, no. What will I do if your sister and our friends know that you and I are having sex?” He kissed David, his mouth open and searching. “I just need a few minutes alone with my husband.”

David groaned, his head tilting back to thunk against the shade drawn over the door’s window panel. “Say that again.”

Patrick took David’s jacket from his hand, tossing it onto the dresser to his right. David’s tie was already untied, but Patrick unbuttoned another shirt button before he leaned in close, inhaling against David’s neck. “My husband.”

“Mm, fuck, okay. I’m on board now.”

“Good.” Patrick sank to his knees. “Because ever since I saw you walking down the aisle, some percentage of my brain was occupied with the thought of doing this.” He reached up under the skirt of David’s tuxedo, pulling his underwear down to his knees.

David pulled the front of the skirt up, wary of soiling it — it was the most expensive clothing purchase he’d made in years — but also just wanting to watch.

Patrick just nuzzled against him at first, and it made David wish there had been time for a shower because he’d definitely sweated a lot over the course of the day, but then Patrick had taken his cock into his mouth and David forgot to worry about it.

“Oh my god, you’re so good at that,” David gasped, his hand coming down to cup the back of Patrick’s head. Patrick worked him expertly, and the sight of him filling Patrick’s mouth while Patrick was still wearing his wedding clothes did something intense for David. He let his hips flex, his cock pushing forward into Patrick’s mouth. Into his husband’s mouth. Fuck.

Then without warning, Patrick’s mouth disappeared.

“Patrick, I’m close, come on,” he whined.

Patrick was looking up at him with those doe-eyes of his. “I don’t know, David. You did already come once today. Maybe I’d like some parity.”

“Oh my god.”

Patrick grinned, standing up. “Can I fuck my husband in this skirt?”

They didn’t manage to get any more clothes off, but they at least managed to make it over to the bed, where thanks to some conveniently placed lube in the bedside table, a few minutes later David found himself on his elbows and knees on those horrible red sheets. Patrick prepped him efficiently, his fingers teasing David’s prostate until he had to bite his hand to keep them from hearing him several doors down. Finally, Patrick pushed inside him with a groan, setting a hard and unrelenting pace from the outset. With a noise that was more sob than anything, David worked his hand down to his cock and stroked himself in time to Patrick’s thrusts. They finished simultaneously, in sync with each other even at this frantic pace.

“Let me clean you up so we don’t mess up your clothes,” David heard Patrick say from somewhere far away.

“Uh huh,” he murmured into the mattress.

“You still want to go party with the girls?” Patrick asked as he returned from the bathroom with a couple of washcloths.

“As soon as I can feel my arms and legs, sure,” David said.

Once they were cleaned up, they flopped down on their backs side by side and looked up at the mirror on the ceiling.

“Thanks for marrying me today,” David whispered.

“Same.”

~~~

2031

David huffed and flipped over onto his other side in the bed, sticking one leg out from under the covers to try to regulate his temperature. He punched his pillow and readjusted it under his head.

Patrick’s voice pierced the near-darkness of the bedroom. “Can’t sleep?”

“I’m fine.” He shifted again, curving his spine in yet another attempt to find a position that didn’t make his back hurt.

“Really? Because you’ve been fidgeting for an hour.”

David turned over, wincing. “Sorry, I can go downstairs. I didn’t mean to keep you up.”

Patrick gestured with his tablet. “You’re not; I was reading.”

“Still, I can go downstairs.”

Setting his tablet reader aside, Patrick rolled toward David. “Do you want to have sex?”

David thought about it, shifting onto his back. “I’m not horny.”

“Me either, but I could probably get there if you wanted to. Either way, I could give you a handjob.”

“It’s the way you’ve never let the romance die that makes this such a successful marriage,” David said, reaching over and patting Patrick’s cheek.

“Yeah, I realize it’s not terribly romantic, but it might help you sleep.”

“You don’t have to do that. I can jerk off if I really want to,” David said.

“Yes, I’m aware you’re capable of jerking off.” Patrick started to turn and reach for his book again. “Let me know if you change your mind.”

“No, wait. I mean, I do sleep better after we’ve fucked than I do after masturbating.”

“You should write for Hallmark,” Patrick said.

“Hey, you’re the one who suggested a utilitarian handjob as a sleep aid.”

“I never said it would be utilitarian.” Patrick scooted closer to David under the thick duvet. “Let’s make sweet, tender love, David.”

“Shut up.”

“Let’s celebrate the beauty of our multi-decade relationship with some lube and—”

“I hate you,” David said, closing the distance between them and kissing him. His hand settled into the familiar spot on Patrick’s neck, long fingers cupped around to stroke through the short hairs on the back of Patrick’s head. He tasted like toothpaste, and even though they’d kissed thousands of times, David still felt a zing of arousal, enveloped in the sensations and warmth of his husband.

Patrick’s hand stole around David’s hip and under the waistband of his sleep pants, fingers digging into his ass cheek and pulling their pelvises flush against each other. A minute of grinding coupled with more deep, wet kisses was all David needed to go from vaguely interested to fully on board.

“Okay, I changed my mind,” David whispered against Patrick’s lips. “I am horny.”

“Mm hmm.”

“As are you,” David said, punctuating that sentence with another grind of his hips.

“Yeah, there’s just something about being kissed by my husband. I don’t know what it is.” Patrick said in that way he had that was simultaneously sarcastic and sweet.

David fumbled in his bedside drawer for lube, then pushed Patrick over onto his back, shoving his underwear down.

“Wait,” Patrick muttered when David squeezed some lube into his palm. “This is backwards, I was gonna do you.”

“After.” David flung the covers aside and wasted no time in closing his fist around his husband’s cock, setting up the rhythm Patrick liked, alternating long strokes with focused attention on the head while Patrick groaned and clutched at David’s arm. “Want anything else? I can finger you open, or get the vibrator—”

“Next time,” Patrick said, his hips thrusting against David’s fist. “Just this is gonna make me come pretty easily.”

“Yeah?” David kissed him and it was sloppy and kind of desperate, and he wondered not for the first time how they still managed to do this, go from lazy banter to being so hungry for each other they could hardly stand not to be touching.

“Yeah. Fuck, do it harder,” Patrick gasped and David did, squeezing and pumping his fist until Patrick came with a pained moan through his clenched teeth, his hips jerking and then slowing to a stop.

“God, you’re so easy,” David said, grinning smugly as he wiped his hand off on Patrick’s t-shirt. Patrick regained his breath, and then sat up in a crunch and pulled his t-shirt off, wiping his stomach clean and tossing it aside. They switched positions, but Patrick paused before he took David’s cock in his hand. “Would you rather have a blowjob?”

“No, this is good. Although can you…” He trailed off in a moan as Patrick stroked him. “Can you put your fingers inside me?”

“Yeah.” Patrick kissed him on the cheek.

David kicked his sleep pants the rest of the way off while Patrick sat up and helped himself to more lube. Then his hands were everywhere, stroking David’s cock and fingering him open, and David threw his head back and let himself feel all of it. When Patrick crooked his fingers and rubbed against his prostate at the same pace that he was stroking David’s cock with the other hand, David was a goner. He came in such record time that it should have been embarrassing.

“Fuck, you’re too good at that,” David gasped as he reached out a grabbed a fresh clean-up rag from his bedside table.

“I memorized the cheat codes to a David Rose orgasm more than ten years ago,” Patrick called as he was walking to the bathroom to clean up his hands.

“Mm hmm. Well done.” He was barely aware of Patrick getting back into bed and settling the duvet over him, and with his last shred of consciousness, he reached out and touched his husband’s hand.

“I love you.”

“Love you, too. Goodnight, David.”

“Night.”

[travllingbunny]

The 100 6x07 Nevermind

Season 6 of The 100 has been fantastic so far, and 6x07 is not just the best episode of the season so far, but also one of my favorite ever episodes of the show. Nevermind is, in many ways, a dream come true for me: this is exactly what I was hoping for at least since the promos for the show started promising the theme of characters “facing their demons”. At the time, I couldn’t have guessed that it would be about Clarke battling a centuries old woman who has taken over her body after her parents had decided to bodysnatch Clarke in order to bring their daughter back, but I was hoping for trippy, mind-bending, character-based storylines. Most of all, one focused on Clarke Griffin, the main character and hero of the show (oddly enough, this needs to be pointed out, since there are fans who keep forgetting it), her psyche, her traumas and emotional issues and character development.

After the wonderful last scene of 6x06 and the promos for this episode, my expectations were really high, and they were met. There was a little bit of fear that the whole “which characters will make a cameo”, “who will be mentioned how many times” thing would distract from Clarke’s character exploration, but that was not the case. This episode was almost entirely (except for the last scene) set in Clarke’s and Josephine’s mind space rather than the real world. The walk down the memory lane that the drawings we saw on Clarke’s mind-wall was there, but it was, above all, a great character study of the show’s protagonist, a battle of wills between the hero and the villain, and it had some big revelations – for the audience or for the characters. It had brilliant dialogue and acting, and was emotional, dark, intense and even funny at times (mostly thanks to Josephine, who is evil and detestable but also incredibly funny and charismatic).

And what particularly made me happy is that it addressed some long-standing questions of morality that the show had been ambiguous about. The show’s moral complexity/greyness has long bordered on moral relativism, and allowed (mis)interpretations in the fandom, to the effect that “There are no good guys, the protagonists are as bad as the villains, therefore it’s all the same and it doesn’t matter if someone does bad things, since everyone does it”. The unfortunate motto “for my people” has been overused and abused by many morally ambiguous or straight-up villainous characters on the show, to justify their own actions (the classic “who are you to talk, when you killed all the Mountain Men! Therefore I get to do whatever I want ‘for my people’’ – as if doing the only thing that could have stopped the evil society of technological vampires/overlords from killing and cannibalizing all your loved ones, is the same as killing people with no remorse to get power). By season 5, Clarke herself seemed to start buying into that view. Josephine Lightbourne again try to use that against Clarke in this episode, and nearly made her give up. This time, however, Clarke and the show both finally said “f*ck you” to that worldview.

One of the reasons why Josephine is such a great villain is that she is both a parallel and a striking contrast to Clarke. On the surface, they seem similar – their looks, background, family. When we first saw her in the flashback in 6x02, the similarities were obvious – another intelligent, capable, beautiful blonde girl with loving parents (Russell, in both versions, even matches the same physical type as Jake), a princess from a privileged background. But Josephine is everything that Clarke-haters (in and out of the show) claim Clarke to be, but that Clarke most definitely is not: selfish, narcissistic, with a god complex, remorseless, sociopathic, completely ruthless, pampered, classist, treating people as disposable. A start contrast to Clarke’s compassionate, caring, self-sacrificing nature.

Various thoughts about this episode in bullet points under the cut.

One of the many contrasts between Clarke and Josephine is the disorganized, beautiful way that different memories fill Clarke’s mind space, as drawings all over the walls of her room, unlike Josephine’s highly structured, organized mind. Just like “Monty”, I also like Clarke’s better.

I’m overall very happy with how this episode included references to various people and events from Clarke’s past, through a combination of drawings, flashbacks, mentions and objects. Most important people in Clarke’s life were referenced – both dead ones like Jake, Finn, Lexa, Jasper, Monty, and living ones like Bellamy and Madi (not so many mentions of Abby, but that’s because she’s both alive and, unlike so many others, not a source of guilt for Clarke).

The only exception is arguably Wells, and it’s really unlucky that the planned appearance by Eli Goree didn’t work out. We still got a confirmation of his importance in Clarke’s life (which should be big – he was her best friend since childhood and died tragically, even if he didn’t last long on the show) through several drawings (and the Chinese version of the idiom “A friend in need is a friend indeed” under one of them), and, more importantly, a close-up of one of them. Let’s be honest, the drawings are generally little more than a cool Easter egg for the fans, if the show doesn’t focus on them through close-ups and flashbacks or mentions – something that the general audience would notice.

I love the way that Clarke’s outfit and hairstyle kept changing depending on which memory or part of her mind space she was in at any given moment. For instance, she started as Ark Clarke from the Pilot, then turned into Eden Clarke when she visited her safe space of the life there with Madi for those 6 years – which was far from perfect (what with being isolated from everyone else, without any adult with her, without other friends or any chance of love or sex life, and waiting for Bellamy to come back and talking to him without answer to keep sane), but was still the most peaceful time she’s known. Except maybe for her childhood, which she did spend in a not-happy space (life on the Ark was difficult, if not for her, then for so many others who were less privileged, and we know Clarke was aware of that), but she had a happy family life, so it makes sense that her father is the first person she would see in her mind-space. Jake and Eden stood for safety and family life and peace, which Clarke thought she got when she briefly believed she had really died – before Jake (aka her own mind) told her it wasn’t true. It’s the sign of her being upset – the rain and storm outside that happened due to her mood – that alerted her to the fact she was still alive.

Every character, other than Josephine, who appeared in Clarke’s mind space was, of course, an embodiment of a part of her.  

Although I’m not sure about ALIE, whose code may have remained there, and who delivered information that Clarke may not have already known. It was the one cameo in this episode that really surprised me (since the rest had been revealed or guessed on social media). She was there for the big revelation that the neural mesh from the time Clarke was in the City of Light is what ended up saving her. This made this episode’s link to 3x13 Nevermore even stronger. (Funny that the erased memory of ALIE!Raven is what gave rise to that awful amnesia theory. Glad that this has been shut down now.) I guess this means that I was wrong about other hosts being savable, and that Delilah is gone forever? A big part of why I wanted it to be true, apart from liking Delilah, was to give the Earthkru more incentive to fight the Primes. But we have been given a lot of other reasons why they should make the decision to so that.

ALIE also had a conversation with Clarke about the nature of life and humanity, which, however, could be just Clarke talking to herself. Clarke has been tempted to run away from pain, she’s even tempted to run from it by accepting death in this episode, but she’s still insisting that pain is a necessary part of life and that there’s no joy without it. At the core, Clarke is not someone who gives up.

The revelation that the darkest and most painful memories are those that aren’t even on the wall and that Clarke keeps hidden, explained some things, such as why there were no drawings on the mind-wall of such huge moments as Jake’s death or Finn’s death (Clarke’s trauma from this was a subject of an entire episode – one of my favorites, 2x09, Remember Me)... However, while I don’t want to criticize the prop department, who did an incredible job drawing those pictures from scenes, they did make an error - one of the drawings of Lexa is actually from the scene of her right after being shot, which doesn’t really fit (her death is one of the “darkest place” hidden memories) – though you wouldn’t know that by just looking at the picture and not knowing the scene.

I’m glad that Josephine called out Clarke on child abuse, and that the drawing of Madi in pain in the shock collar was so prominent on the wall. Season 5 had Clarke at her lowest point, and that was certainly, IMO, one of the worst things she’s done.

We know (from 6x04) that Clarke’s biggest regret is leaving Bellamy in Polis in season 5, and this episode confirmed that this weighs so heavy on Clarke’s heart that she can’t even face Bellamy in her mind space (which fits with the fact that the darkest and most traumatic moments are those she did not put on the wall). She is afraid that he hasn’t really forgiven her in his heart, and that he can’t, because she can’t forgive herself. Even if Bellamy is alive and well, Clarke’s feelings for him make her betrayal of him unforgivable in her own eyes (even though, at the time she did it, she had been heartbroken and furious because she felt he had betrayed her). Octavia, or rather Blodreina, was the right embodiment of her guilt in a weird way, since she was the danger that Clarke left Bellamy to, the one who threw him into the pit in the first place (kind of like Jaha was the embodiment of Bellamy’s guilt over the culling in 1x08). She reminded Clarke of some of her other sins, those that involved Clarke being ready to sacrifice Octavia (while trying to protect Bellamy) – letting the bomb drop on the people in Tondc, stealing the bunker in season 4, but she was there mostly to talk about Bellamy, because the relationship between Clarke and Octavia has always mostly revolved around their respective relationships with him. Even in her own mind, Clarke is still deflecting when confronted with her feelings for Bellamy (“I care about both of you”, just like she said “I care about all of them” when called out on her feelings for Bellamy by Lexa in 2x14). Octavia is also the embodiment of the unwillingness to forgive, so her refusal to fight for Clarke makes sense.

Not that Clarke needed any help to kick Josephine’s arse. It was satisfying to see, but expected. Josephine is an actual pampered princess who’s never had to fight for anything, while Clarke has been fighting and surviving in adverse circumstances for 7 years.

Maya’s appearance made perfect sense, but she was the most OOC character of all the “mind space” characters – maybe because Clarke didn’t get to know her that well, but mostly because she was the embodiment of Clarke’s guilt over the innocent deaths she’s caused. Maya was a good person, someone who helped them against her own people because it was the right thing to do, and because she knew what the Mountain Men were doing was wrong. She is also linked in Clarke’s mind with her feelings of guilt over Jasper – Clarke didn’t know Maya well, but Jasper was one of her closest friends, and Clarke feels deeply guilty for indirectly causing his downward spiral that ended with his suicid4. I was happy to see him referenced so much in this episode – through “Maya”, the case Clarke found in 5x01, and his goggles that she found there, which all played a big role in this episode. The accusations that “Maya” (Clarke herself) made sounded a lot like the repertoire of Clarke-haters: that she likes being a savior, has a god complex, has killed more people than she’s saved, is no better than the Primes… This is a confirmation that Clarke herself has agonized over all of these things. But it’s not what the real Maya would have said – the real Maya died acknowledging the responsibility all of the Mountain Men had for the evil things their society was doing, saying “None of us is innocent”. When Clarke made her “Maya” character be helpful against Josephine, it was the closest thing to what the real Maya had been like.

Clarke’s darkest place, the most painful and traumatic memories she has, are the deaths of Finn and Lexa, the only two people she has had romantic relationships with – relationships that were both extremely brief and tragic, and ended with deaths that traumatized Clarke a lot and made her feel guilty – even though she doesn’t really have, IMO, objective reasons to feel responsible for either of them, it’s not hard to see why she would feel, on the emotional, irrational level, that she is the one causing people to die. (The show and especially the fandom have tended to ignore one of these relationships  post-season 2 and to over-focus on the other, so I was pleasantly surprised that they were both acknowledged in a similar way for their role in Clarke’s development and emotional traumas – with the visual references with Lexa’s throne and the pole Finn was tied to and the knife Clarke used to mercy kill him, combined with the flashback of Finn’s death, a different flashback of Lexa seen before, and Josephine’s indirect mention of her death – which was probably the most elegant solution, since I don’t think the show would ever dare replay the footage of her death for fear of more backlash.)

It’s certainly no coincidence that this dark place that’s about Clarke’s traumas of her tragic romantic life is the place where Josephine breaks Clarke by convincing her that Bellamy has given up on her and that he and everyone are better off with her dead. Josephine didn’t technically lie – she told her he took her death hard but in the end made the rational choice of agreeing to the deal with her murderers. But, by showing her an out-of-context memory of Bellamy taking the deal, she showed her a skewed version of the truth. Clarke didn’t see Bellamy’s grieving, despair and anger, and didn’t realize that Bellamy saying that she would do the same was out of admiration for her, as a leader who’s not just smart but also selfless and caring. She probably took it as another sign he sees her as a monster, doesn’t care that much about her and is better off without her, because it fed into her own insecurities.

Josephine: “Have you considered sacrificing yourself?” Bitch, watch the season 4 finale. She didn’t just consider it, she did it.

I loved the fact that the case Clarke used to hide the important memory was Jasper’s case, that it contained Jasper’s goggles alongside Jake’s video, and that the lock password was “102”. More confirmation of the importance of the initial Delinquents community from season 1 in Clarke’s life and the show. “You forgot Bellamy and Raven” may be my favorite line from this episode.

Monty’s return (which the show tried to hide by not putting Chris Larkin’s name in the credits until the end credits, but it revealed it through not cutting enough of one of the promo pics) was not a complete surprise, thanks to the detective work of some of the fans, but was still my favorite part of the episode. Monty was most in-character, because Clarke knew him so well, and it makes perfect sense that he was the voice of Clarker’s reason and moral compass, which is what made her change her mind after having given up and given Josephine the victory. (You want a great platonic friendships between a man and a woman on The 100? Here it is!)

The ‘Monty” part of Clarke’s mind fought back, against all the BS – the “bear it so they don’t have to”, “for my people” mottos and moral relativism and Josephine’s half-truths) and reaffirmed Clarke’s resilience and will to live, and reminded her that what it all comes down to is not just saving your people, but doing the right thing. After Monty told them to be good guys and be happy. Both of these messages are what Clarke had to remember. As I’ve been pointing out, doing better is not just standing by and not killing people. It’s also actively fighting against evil. They are not being good guys if they let the Primes murder, bodysnatch, oppress, brainwash and sacrifice the people from their community, just because it doesn’t affect them.  As “Monty” (Clarke) pointed out, it’s not doing better if you let the Primes murder people to live forever.

Clarke’s trip through Josephine’s memories (of being killed by Kaylee, and of killing Isaac and sacrificing a baby) helped her fully realize that Josephine is truly evil and needs to be stopped. Really, if killing babies is not enough to make you classify someone as true evil on a whole different level, what can?

Josephine tried to pull the “for my people” motto with Issac, but she was full of s*hit. She only does things for herself and maybe a few other people (not even all the Primes, since she murdered four of them). We learned that Children of Gabriel are literally the children that the Primes tried to sacrifice to the trees and that Isaac saved and brought to Gabriel. We also got another confirmation of the cruel caste system of Sanctum, where “nulls” (people who are not Nightblood gene carriers) are treated as lower life forms, and routinely sacrificed, and that Josephine would rather kill them all, if she was allowed to by her father. Not that having the NB gene is so good, as it means your child may end up as a host, and obviously, the “honor” of being a Nightblood means you get bodysnatched at the age of 21.

When Isaac said  “if only we were allowed to be more than your janitors and guards”, it felt like it was the writers’ way of reminding us of the class system on the Ark, where Bellamy was a janitor and a guard-in-training. It’s also another reminder of how different Clarke and Josephine are – Josephine would have considered someone like Bellamy expendable and useless, whereas Clarke quickly showed in season 1 she valued people based on their personal qualities rather than their origin or class.

It was cool to see a flashback to the time before the apocalypse, complete with references to Diyoza and Becca, but this memory was my least favorite part of the episode. I guess I just wasn’t that interested in Josephine’s traumatic memories, since I don’t think they’re enough to explain her sociopathic nature. On second thought, you could say that this guy was her Finn, and that her response to that trauma was completely different from Clarke’s – genuinely shutting herself down to any compassion or remorse.

I love the fact that what saved the day was the fact that Clarke and Bellamy were both good students of Earth skills (taught by Pike!) and that they are, once again, so well attuned to each other that they can communicate this way. Or the fact that Bellamy was watching JC so carefully, even though it must have hurt him emotionally to look at her, that he noticed her movements and read them correctly.

Nice to see Miller back, but did he have to be so… not-bright? In any case, it’s great to see Bellamy as determined to save Clarke, as he was despondent in the last episode. This is maybe the first time that Clarke really needs saving, but a huge and crucial part of that rescue was Clarke deciding that she wants to live.

Rating: 10/10

[bunnykaye]

AoS for the fandom thingy 🥰

001 | Send me a fandom and I will tell you my:

Favorite character:

WHY’D YOU HAVE TO DO THIS TO ME, ANA?? .😅😭

Then imma have to cheat a bit and say that FitzSimmons are my favorite characters. For obvious reasons. 😂😂😂

Least Favorite character:

This shouldn’t come as a surprise to you. Will Daniels. 👀😂

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon):

- FitzSimmons

- Mackelena

- Huntingbird

- Scis and Spies

- Philinda

Character I find most attractive:

OHHHHHHHHHHH LEOPOLD JAMES FITZ HANDS DOWN. 

I MEANNNNNNN..........

Character I would marry:

I feel like I could go with either Fitz or Simmons on this one 😍🥰

Character I would be best friends with:

Again, probably Fitz OR Simmons. But I’d like to be best friends with them both lol

a random thought:

I am constantly thinking of the possibilities for flashback scenes with FS on S7. And just thinking about it makes me tear up 😭😭😭

An unpopular opinion:

HOT DAMN we talk about unpopular opinions allllll the time but right now I can’t think of anything omfg 🤣🤣🤣

Ok then, so probably the whole thing that went down in 5B. There was no absolute right or wrong with all of the team members. The pressure of saving the world AND saving Coulson was weighing a lot on them all, and if there was anyone to blame it should be all of them, not single out one of the members.

My Canon OTP:

FITZSIMMONS FITZSIMMONS FITZSIMMONS.

My Non-canon OTP:

Both are canon OTPs on their own but probably Scis and Spies? 👀

Most Badass Character:

Melinda Qiaolian May. Literally in awe of this woman.

Most Epic Villain:

I hate saying this because I hated 4C.. but AIDA/Madame Hydra/Ophelia was really an awesome villain. She was a trojan horse (because she was there from the start of S4) and she turned everything upside down for SHIELD. 

Pairing I am not a fan of:

Anyone shipped with Ward, really.

Character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another):

IDK if this is a character, it’s more of a storyline/relationship but probably FitzDaisy’s friendship. I’ve thought how they could go S5 after all the shit that went down after 5x14, and as a FitzDaisy brotp stan we only got crumbs in S6, and I’ve accepted it somewhat, but I can’t help but still feel bitter about how it was basically swept under the rug. I’ve moved on from this, really I’ve moved on you know about this lmao

Favourite Friendship:

SEE ABOVE ANSWER LOL. Yeah, FitzDaisy is my favorite brotp HANDS DOWN. 😭😭😭

BUT ALSO I treasure the bond that happened between Fitz and Deke this past season, because it was def on my wishlist for them to have bobo-grandson moments AND THEY DELIVERED!

Character I most identify with:

I used to think I was a lot like Fitz, but then 6x06 happened and I realized that I see a lot of myself in Jemma too.

Character I wish I could be:

I would like to answer FitzSimmons but I think I would want to be like May, tbh. SHE’S AMAZING. 🥰😍

[bonesgadh]

“Breaking the wheel” and my ideal ending to Game of Thrones.

One of the many things that pissed me off about the GoT finale (and season 8 in general) was how D&D chose to end Daenerys’ storyline. I know iT wAs FoReShAdOwEd she would go mad and that she will share the same fate in the books. However, even though evidence kind of pointed at Dany dying in the end and loosing her mind I have my own idea of how her story should’ve ended.

In the 8th episode of the fifth season Daenerys delivers one of her most famous quotes (and one of the most famous in the show overall):

Lannister, Baratheon, Stark, Tyrell. They're all just spokes on a wheel. This one's on top, then that one's on top, and on and on it spins, crushing those on the ground... I'm not going to stop the wheel, I’m going to break the wheel.

A few episodes later, in season 6, Dario tells Daenerys the following words:

You weren’t made to sit on a chair in a palace. You are a conqueror, Daenerys Stormborn.

When I first saw 5x08 I understood the “I’m not going to stop the wheel, I’m going to break the wheel” quote as Daenerys affirming she would end the long cycle of conqueror-conquered which was a bit odd to me because, after all, she wanted to be Queen of the Seven Kingdoms. Like @misseffie mentioned on this ask she answered a couple of days ago, another Targaryen sitting on the throne would only mean more of the same.

However, after Dario’s quote from 6x06 and because GoT loved foreshadowing, I had a revelation that maybe both scenes were heavily related and here’s why:

When Aegon conquered the Seven Kingdoms he pretty much forced them to come together under his rule. They were all the Targaryens’ “slaves”, sort to speak. Daenerys experienced first hand how much the northerners longed for independence and how resentful they were of her for being a Targaryen, as they remembered what had happened the last time a Targaryen had brought dragons to the North.

Here’s where my ideal ending scenario begins.

After the Great War Daenerys understands the northerners motivations and realizes maybe her claiming the Iron Throne isn’t a very good idea after all because she’ll just be more of the same, no real change and no breaking the wheel. Instead, in her condition of Breaker of Chains she would make it her mission to free the people of the Seven Kingdoms not from Cersei’s reign, but from the idea of the Iron Throne itself. After defeating Cersei in King’s Landing and pretty much conquering the Seven Kingdoms—as Aegon did—she would claim the throne but only for a little while, and she would proclaim the dissolution of the realm and it getting reorganized into nine independent regions:

The North (ruled by Sansa Stark)

The Riverlands (ruled by Edmure Tully)

The Iron Islands (ruled by Yara Greyjoy)

The Vale (ruled by Robin Arryn)

The Westerlands (ruled either by Jaime or Tyrion Lannister)

The Reach (ruled by someone other than Bronn, probably Davos Seaworth)

The Stormlands (ruled by Gendry Baratheon)

Dorne (ruled by whoever is head of House Martell now)

The Crownlands (there’s no clear heir to this region so Daenerys would give the people the option of choosing their ruler, and they would choose her. She would rename it the Dragonlands)

That way, in some sort of poetic cinema, Daenerys would destroy what his ancestor created. She would break the wheel built by Aegon himself, fulfilling the promise she made in season 5. Full circle.

This is how I would’ve loved GoT to end. I know it was a pipe dream but hey, I had a dream.

[jbuffyangel]

Selfless: Arrow 6x23 Review (Life Sentence)

Arrow delivers an emotional, but unsurprising finale. There isn’t much we didn’t see coming, but thankfully Stephen Amell and Paul Blackthorne, in particular, brought their A games and made me feel all the feels.

And oh yes, you can bet your sweet bippy we’ll be discussing the whole Oliver-didn’t-tell-Felicity-he’s-going-to-prison-for-life situation.

Let’s dig in…

Preface

Arrow Season 6 is similar to Season 4 in the sense there were certain tent points the writers were trying to hit. It resulted in pushing the story a certain direction rather than letting it develop organically. For example, the Olicity break up was easily avoided just like Oliver going to prison is easily avoided.

However, if Olicity breaking up was the only possible outcome then lying was the lesser of storyline evils. We have to suspend logic for prison to become the only possible outcome like we did in Season 4. Does it make great writing? No. It doesn’t, but that’s the way the cookie crumbles with Arrow sometimes.

The primary issue with Season 6 is the Big Bad. Arrow lives and dies with their Big Bad, since 75% of the story is built around stopping this person. Ricardo Diaz is easily Arrow’s worst Big Bad ever. Supposedly, it’s impossible for Oliver to stop Diaz on his own because he’s always two steps ahead and has the city on lock.

Umm… no. There’s almost nothing in the way Arrow has built or presented Diaz that makes him a viable threat to Oliver or the city. He’s a poor imitation of a gangster who screams a lot. The only reason Diaz is a few steps ahead is because the other characters reacted illogically or stupidly to him. Oliver should have been able to take this guy down long before 6x23. Hell, Diggle should have taken him down in 6x06.

We have to believe Diaz’s is an unstoppable Big Bad, which requires Oliver to ask the FBI for help and make this deal. 

Unfortunately, this is just not true. If this was Adrian Chase as Prometheus then we can absolutely understand why Oliver would go running to the FBI. 

Diaz? Not so much.

The intent of this preface is to acknowledge I see the Grand Canyon sized plot holes. 

Yes, prison is easily avoided. Yes, Ricardo Diaz is the worst and can easily be taken down without all this extra “help.” Or if “help” is required then get it from someone who doesn’t demand 25 to life.

Olicity

No beating around the bush. Let’s dive right in. Oliver has secured everyone immunity (Yeah!!!) and spends the better part of the episode casually dodging Felicity while he goes on a farewell tour with the other characters.  Felicity picks up on it because 1) she’s Felicity and 2) Oliver is ridiculously obvious about it.

Felicity wants to know what Oliver gave Watson to secure immunity for everyone. Rather than patiently wait for Oliver to fess up like she normally does, Felicity offers a guesses - Oliver agreed to give up the Green Arrow. This guess conveniently gives Oliver the opportunity to lie without really lying. He sidesteps the truth by answering, “Sort of.” 

Sure, giving up the Green Arrow is all part of life in prison, my forever gumdrop. Anything else you’d like to know? Of course, Oliver should have fessed up immediately. Lies of omission are still lies and we danced this dance all of Season 4 and Season 5 Oliver Jonas Queen! Learn fool!

Felicity’s reaction to Oliver giving up the hood is something we should make note of.

Source: @callistawolf​

We can insert this gif for every stupid decision Oliver has ever made.

What irritates me about this scene is an argument snowballs on false pretenses. Oliver doesn’t tell Felicity what they are really fighting about. He is giving up being Green Arrow because HE IS GOING TO PRISON. Oliver no longer believes in becoming his best self because HE IS GOING TO PRISON. Watson isn’t stopping Oliver from being who he is because it was OLIVER’S IDEA TO GO TO PRISON.

This is like picking a fight over laundry when you are really arguing about money. Stop talking about detergent when you’re really throwing down over the 401k. I’m also having trouble wrapping my head around prison being Oliver’s idea, 

but of course it was because 1) Oliver is the stupidest to ever stupid and 2) he is that selfless. 

We are led to believe Oliver is just about to tell Felicity the truth, but they are interrupted by Curtis because he insists on annoying me every single episode.

Watson officially arrests Oliver while he waits in the hospital for news on Quentin with the rest of the team. 

He explains to everyone (primarily Felicity) he’s sorry he hasn’t explained what’s going on, but there just wasn’t any time. Umm… how about those few minutes you’ve been sitting in a waiting room with your wife, Oliver? Seems to me there was plenty of time to fess up.

Me: Yup, that’s right. Look away in shame you big, dumb, guilty oak tree!

Also me: My poor-honorable-yet-misguided-selfless-cupcake-in-perfectly-accentuated-leather-pants.

Oliver didn’t confess because he didn’t want to confess. Telling Felicity makes it real. Telling Felicity means Oliver has to face everything he has given up. He’s kept it together as he hunted down Diaz and said his goodbyes to Diggle, Quentin, Rene and Dinah. But now it’s just Oliver and Felicity in a room. He has to tell his wife goodbye and Oliver can’t keep it together anymore.

Felicity is ready. She has a plan and promises Oliver she will break him out of prison with Diggle’s help. Oliver explains he’s being transferred to a supermax. A breakout is impossible.

Source: oliverfelicitygifs

Felicity argues Oliver kept his identity secret because he wanted a life beyond the Green Arrow. This confession, this agreement, sacrifices that dream. It sacrifices a life he was so close to living. Oliver understands that. 

He wanted to save the city more. He wanted to protect Felicity and William more. Without them there is no dream. There is no life. He would have nothing. Oliver would sacrifice anything to keep his wife and son safe, including his freedom.

Source: oliverfelicitygifs

Marc Guggenheim explained in an interview the reason why Oliver did not tell Felicity about the deal he made with Watson is because she would talk him out of it. I agree this is true. I cannot imagine any circumstances in which Felicity Smoak would agree to her husband spending life in prison. Can you? 

Look at her reaction when she thought Oliver was only giving up the hood. Felicity almost had Oliver convinced then and she didn’t even know what they were really arguing about.

Felicity would have convinced Oliver to forego this lunacy because he doesn’t want to make this sacrifice. Oliver wants to go home, make dinner for his family, play a video game with his son, put William to bed, and then make love to his wife. Oliver doesn’t want to go to prison. He’s holding on by a tether. One slight push in the other direction and his will would break. It’s not difficult for Felicity to change Oliver’s mind because he wants her to change his mind.

That doesn’t make what Oliver did okay. He absolutely should have discussed his plan with Felicity prior to making a deal with Watson. Felicity would have argued passionately against it and Oliver would have either listened to her (likely) or did it anyway (less likely, but he can be a stubborn mule, so possible). 

However, my husband doesn’t get a free pass to lie to me simply because he knows I am going to disagree. That’s not how marriage works. This is Felicity’s life too and Oliver made a monumental decision for her rather than with her. I simply understand why Oliver did it. Both things can be true at once.

I suppose my Buffy/Angel history is coloring my opinion. 

Angel became human once, but chose to become a vampire again by the end of the episode. I’m still mad at him over it and it’s been 20 years.

Angel sacrificed the one thing he always wanted, a happy and human life with Buffy, to save her life and the lives of other. 

Unfortunately, Angel didn’t discuss the decision with Buffy beforehand. He made a life altering choice for her rather than with her. Why? Because Angel knew Buffy would change his mind. Where Whedon succeeds is where Guggenheim fails. ANGEL TELLS BUFFY THAT.

“I couldn’t do it if I woke up with you one more morning.” (Angel, “I Will Remember You”)

See? It’s so simple. 

One line explaining a character’s thinking rather than relying on an interview post airing to explain it. It doesn’t mean Buffy shouldn’t have a say, but it made Angel’s choices a lot clearer. At the very least, Oliver needed to explain why he didn’t discuss prison with her. Oliver needed to say he feared Felicity would change his mind. We needed a line like, “I couldn’t do it if I woke up with you one more morning.” Hell, just plagiarizes it. 

Despite Stephen’s assertions this was the most emotional scene ever between Oliver and Felicity, I didn’t feel it. 

Maybe it was the way the scene was shot. Felicity kneeling, rather than sitting across the table and holding Oliver’s hand, felt awkward. Stephen Amell tends to like the scenes where he’s allowed to emote more. The airplane scene in 3x20 is a great example of this. I thought Emily and Stephen’s acting was wonderful, but something took me out of it.  My issue was probably with the dialogue – not with what was said, but what wasn’t.

My frustration with Marc and Wendy’s writing is there’s often things left unsaid. We are so close to the characters saying what needs to be said, but ultimately they fall short. I needed Oliver and Felicity to have their “I Will Remember You” fight, but the scene didn’t even come close. 

Maybe they will pick up this fight/discussion when Arrow premieres in Season 7, but I believe the time for Felicity to voice her anger over Oliver’s decision was in 6x23. Arrow is constantly putting Olicity discussions on hold because of storyline carryover/cliffhanger shenanigans and it gets frustrating. It seems odd for Felicity to say six months later, “Hey remember that time you made a life altering decision for me, went to prison for life, and left me alone to raise our son? That sucked.” But that’s Arrow for you.

I don’t view this lie in the same lens as the lie about William.

I know I know, but I have reasons. Samantha gave Oliver an ultimatum and I wouldn’t have much respect for the man if he walked out on his child. 

However, there was something selfish in Oliver’s lie to Felicity. He was able to spend time with his son and maintain his relationship with his fiancé without dealing with any consequences. The lie allowed Oliver to have his cake and eat it too.

There is no cake here.  There isn’t even a can of frosting. 

Source: olivergifs

Oliver is giving up everything and everyone he’s ever loved. The very definition of selfless is putting the needs and wishes of other’s above one’s own. The William lie exposed trust issues, Oliver’s guilt over Robert Queen’s death, his never ending need to self destruct, and a refusal to let Felicity all the way in. I don’t see any of that present now. This is good because it would unravel all the hard work Oliver did in Season 5, particularly 5x20.  

This isn’t about trust, or being afraid of the darkest parts of himself, or self destruction, or refusing to let Felicity all the way in, or unworthiness. This decision is 100% about falling on the sword and protecting those he loves. Okay, let’s agree it’s 90% about falling on the sword and protecting others. The other 10% is Oliver “Everything Is Always My Fault Even Though It Really Isn’t” Queen. Guilt is absolutely playing a role in Oliver’s decision.

Oliver: I had to look at the way I’ve been doing things. It’s not working. I lost my city. I lost my team. There’s a penance for that. 

What’s so sad is Oliver truly did nothing wrong. What happened with the city and the team was mostly out of his control. His team abandoned Oliver primarily because they all regressed to a toddler like state and threw a never ending tantrum. Oliver offered apologies long ago that were refused. The newbies, and Diggle, chose to leave and that choice was outside Oliver’s control. 

But Oliver always looks inward rather than place the blame on others. He’s much more comfortable holding himself accountable than he is holding others to the same standard. This is why Oliver is more than a hero. He’s a martyr.

I do not believe Oliver is hitting another self destruct button on his life like when he slept with Sara and brought her on the Queen’s Gambit or when he lied to Felicity about William. The darker parts of Oliver’s soul are not driving his decision - his light is. Oliver’s protectiveness, self sacrificing, and honor led him here. He’s not running from who he is. Oliver is being the very best version of himself. This is what a hero looks like.

Source:  arrowdaily

But that doesn’t make it any easier on Felicity. 

Source: oliverfelicitygifs

I went back and reread some of my 5x20 review and landed on this:

If Felicity gave it time, if she let things continue the way they were, then she’d fall right back into his arms. It’s so easy to love him. It’s so easy to lose herself in him. Felicity couldn’t do that because she didn’t want to wake up twenty years later, with her marriage crumbling around her, because Oliver Queen abandoned her again to another lie or another choice that didn’t include her. Felicity doesn’t want to become a ghost in her own life.

But isn’t that exactly what happened? Didn’t Oliver abandon Felicity to another lie, another choice, that didn’t include her? Didn’t he leave Felicity on an island all over again? 

Yes, that’s exactly what happened. I expect Felicity will express some anger towards Oliver when Season 7 premieres. She sure as hell is entitled to it.

However, it won’t be a deal breaker like it was in Season 4. Felicity isn’t walking away this time because she knows exactly what she walked into with this marriage. We already know Felicity’s stance because she told us or, that is, she told William in 6x11.

This is probably the most important monologue of Season 6. Even though Felicity is talking about Oliver the scene isn’t really about him. This scene is about how Felicity views loving Oliver, marriage, and making peace with the life they’ve chosen. 

Felicity knows, without equivocation, what it means to be married to a hero. The fear of losing Oliver is what kept Felicity from marrying him. 

She thought if they could just keep the status quo and not rock the boat then she would never have to face losing him again. And Felicity has discovered there’s many ways to lose Oliver Queen. 

However, she remembered life is precious. 

Felicity would rather live knowing everything can be taken from her in an instant, while holding on to Oliver, rather than live life without him.  

But Felicity recognizes Oliver’s imperfections. 

He’s made many mistakes that have torn their relationship apart. Oliver swore he would never lie to Felicity again and yet… here we are.

Felicity predicted this day in her break up with Oliver and Felicity Smoak is never wrong. Back then it was a knowledge Felicity couldn’t live with. It’s the reason she walked. She couldn’t be married to a man who at any point would leave her on an island. She couldn’t be married to a man who would exclude her from decisions. She couldn’t be married to a man who would lie to her.

Or can she?

The truth is we all have pieces of ourselves that are hardwired a certain way. We all have imperfections that creep up no matter how hard we work on them. Those imperfections rear their ugly heads in our relationships and, for better or worse, we argue again and again over them with our partners.  There is no perfect human being. Love is about dealing with the bad in our partner as much as it is about loving our partner for all the good.

For all of Oliver’s faults, and there are many, what remains hardwired is his protectiveness. Oliver Queen loves deeply and there are no limits to the lengths he will go to protect those he loves. Oliver will make sure that he is the one to fall on the sword because there have been too many times he’s watched loved ones fall before him.

I joked in my 6x22 review it was almost as if Oliver and Felicity were competing over who gets to die for who. This is a competition Oliver will always win. He will lie, cheat, beg, borrow, steal and, yes, even kill to ensure Felicity’s safety. There is no line Oliver won’t cross. 

Felicity danced with her darkness in Season 5, but she still didn’t come close to Oliver and that’s the way he’s determined to keep it. He will sacrifice his light to save hers. The only thing more unbearable than going to prison is Felicity going to prison. Oliver doesn’t fear his own death, but the deaths of those he loves. This is what will always drive him. There is no changing this. This is simply who Oliver Queen is.

What happened just before Oliver went to Agent Watson? Felicity almost suffocated from smoke inhalation. Oliver was carrying her lifeless body in his arms. She was prepared to die to stop Diaz and almost did. So, there are no limits to what Oliver had to do to make sure that didn’t happen again. And yes that includes lying.

Does it make lying okay? NO OF COURSE NOT.

I’m saying this is an imperfection in Oliver. He has a God complex. All heroes do. 

Felicity told Oliver post coital in 5x20 if she could understand why he lied then maybe she could find her way back to him. Felicity understands why Oliver lied then and she understands why Oliver lied now. 

He is imperfect, but it comes from a pure place. His choices are not always good, but his intentions are. Oliver Queen is an imperfect heart trying to love perfectly.

Source: oliverfelicitygifs

Felicity knew there would come a day where Oliver would sacrifice it all for the greater good because that’s what this life requires. That’s what it means to be married to a hero. Oliver Queen is selfless. 

Source: oliverfelicitygifs

That selflessness means sacrifice for Felicity too. It means there will be times she is alone on an island. Felicity said I do anyway because an imperfect life with Oliver Queen is better than a life without him. Oliver’s selflessness is what Felicity loves most about her husband… and what she hates most.

Derek: I promised that I’d love you –

Meredith: Even when you hate me.

Derek: Even when I hate you. (Grey’s Anatomy, 8x03)

Felicity allows her husband to be who he is. She loves Oliver for who he is and in spite of who he is. She shares this man with the city he’s sworn to protect. Felicity understands Oliver will never entirely belong to her or the life they’ve built together as long as he’s Green Arrow. The mission will always come first.

But Felicity chose this life and Oliver Queen.  She will go into witness protection, with her son, and face this island. She won’t be entirely alone. Felicity will have William and he will have her, but that’s a cold comfort to what lays before her – a life without Oliver.  

Source: oliverfelicitygifs

This will be a long, dark, lonely and painful journey for Felicity. A journey she wasn’t given a say in. As angry as Felicity will be at Oliver, and she should let him have it, she will also understand why because she would do the same. Felicity would do anything to protect her family and city. Her sacrifices are equally selfless as Oliver’s. It’s why they are a perfect match. They are both heroes.

Source: gothsmoak and  olivergifs

Quentin Lance, Black Siren and Oliver Queen

Quentin finally dies for his fake daughter due to his overwhelming guilt over his real daughter’s death. A few therapy visits would have helped immensely and would have been far less costly Q, but go off I guess. 

Arrow failed to write any meaningful storylines post L*urel’s death for Quentin. I had hope when he dated Mama Smoak, but that went nowhere. He was reduced to a prop for Bl*ck S*ren this season and I’d rather see him gone than used like that.

Arrow keeps flip flopping back and forth between Bl*ck S*ren being Quentin’s daughter to Bl*ck S*ren not being Quentin’s daughter so much I have to take migraine pills. 

Sadly, the flip flop is all they have with the character. This push/pull with the redemption arc is all Bl*ck S*ren has going for her. If they settle on evil then it renders Quentin’s sacrifice pointless. If they settle on good then the writers are back in their LL writing box and I firmly believe they’d rather eat their young than go back there. 

So we flip flop. Sometimes Bl*ck S*ren is acknowledged as Quentin’s daughter. Sometimes the other characters go out of their way to point out Bl*ck S*ren is NOT his daughter. Sigh. I just don’t care anymore.

Let’s be clear that BS is an absolute waste of character space regardless. 

Source: katie-mcgraths

The entire reason Felicity and William are going into witness protection is because she decided to use her Canary Cry against Diaz for the first time all season and at exactly the wrong moment. 

Did BS really believe the fall off the roof would kill Diaz? It looked like she pushed him off a waterslide. I guess we can add stupid to the long list of unpleasant characteristics. 

The only upside of that scene was seeing Oliver’s crazy angry eyes. I’m gonna abuse this gif.

Source: katie-mcgraths

He wanted to throw her off the building right along with Diaz. Have at it, big boy. God bless.

Before Quentin runs off to save Evil L*urel, he and Oliver reminisces about how long they’ve known each other and how far their relationship has come. Yup, we get it Arrow. Quentin is going to die. No need to hang a neon sign.

Quentin not so casually mentions his pacemaker to Oliver (Ha! Remember that 2x23-3x01 plot line that was never spoken of again until now?!), so Felicity is able to track Quentin’s and thereby zero in on Diaz. It’s one of the few times Quentin’s crazy actually made sense and proved useful. Way to out on a high note Captain.

Unfortunately, he’s a moron because he jumps in front of the bullet meant for Evil L*urel. He just stayed put and BS moved a little to the right we would have a mortal wound. A girl can dream.

Quentin’s willingness to put it all on the line for his fake daughter leads to a very nice goodbye scene with Oliver. 

Source: @olivergifs​

Both Stephen Amell and Paul Blackthorne brought their A game. Oliver tells Quentin he’s like a father to him and it made me feel all the things. Yup, I was a sobbing mess.

See? Oliver didn’t need to marry LL for this father/son relationship to develop between these two men. 

That road began in 1x23 when Felicity defended The Hood to Quentin and he began to see the vigilante in a different light. Oliver and Quentin managed to carve out a relationship that had absolutely nothing to do with L*urel and it’s one of the series best arcs.  

All Oliver Queen ever wanted was to earn Quentin’s forgiveness and respect. It was a long, difficult and painful road, but they eventually arrived at a place Oliver never dreamed possible. 

Not only did Quentin forgive and respect Oliver, he loved him like a son. 

It’s easy to forget Oliver Queen is an orphan. Quentin was Oliver’s foster father in more ways than one. Everything Oliver said to Quentin was true. One of the primary reasons Oliver is a good father to William is because he had Quentin Lance as an example. One of the reasons Oliver is the man he is today is because Quentin Lance was in his life.

So this is goodbye Quentin. 

I believe it was time to let the character go, but I will miss his snarky yet on point remarks about the ridiculousness of Arrow and his sage wisdom. 

I’m sorry Arrow didn’t give Paul Blackthorne more to do because he is an acting rock star who had the power to make me cry whenever he felt like it. We’ll miss you Paul, but I am excited to see what he does next.

Source:  sirenfrost

One thing I am super ticked off about is Sara didn’t get a goodbye scene with her father, ya know, his ACTUAL DAUGHTER.  The real one who is alive and standing in the hallway!!!!!

What was the point of having Caity Lotz on the show if she didn’t get a scene with Paul Blackthorne? I’m a big Sara/LL fan, but that little chat with BS in the hallway could happen anytime. Rene rated a goodbye scene with Lance, but nope, not his daughter. Honestly, this show makes absolutely no sense sometimes.

John Diggle

Oliver makes up a second Green Arrow suit (I want to know who makes those. I feel like this is an important character we are not meeting) and offers it to Diggle during his farewell tour. Diggle turns it down because their “disagreement was never about the uniform.” 

This is true. It was about Diggle’s mid life crisis.

Diggle: I really thought I wanted this mantle. It means something. You’ve made it mean something. When our city looks at it – it gives them hope Oliver. It would be diminished if there was more than one.

So now Diggle doesn’t want to be Green Arrow? Or he wants to be Green Arrow if he’s the only one? My head hurts. Can we just move on from this ridiculous storyline? 

Put on the Spartan suit Diggle and come home. As far as the Green Arrow giving hope to the city – we are talking about the same city prosecuting Oliver right? The sentiment is nice, but Diggle doesn’t exactly have his finger on the pulse on the will of the people.

Oliver became almost everything Diggle ever asked him to be. He was a husband, father, mayor and vigilante all at once. Oliver becoming the best version of himself caused Diggle to spiral. If John is not counseling Oliver on how to beat back his demons then where does that leave him? John Diggle’s mission was Oliver Queen, but the student became the teacher this season and John couldn’t handle it. Diggle lost his way when Oliver found his. He no longer knew what his purpose was. Diggle couldn’t see that even though Oliver may need him differently it doesn’t mean he needs John any less.

Hopefully, Oliver selflessly going to prison for everyone on the team and securing them immunity, will remind Diggle who Oliver Queen is. He is a man worthy of John’s respect, admiration, friendship and love. Prison will present a huge emotional challenge to Oliver and he’ll need Diggle’s guidance more than ever.

However, when Oliver emerges from the darkness of prison and finds his way back to the light of heroism, I hope John emerges from dark as well. Hopefully, John is able to move past his mid life crisis and find a purpose beyond Oliver Queen. Maybe Diggle will realize being Spartan is plenty of purpose. Maybe he’ll discover something new like Felicity did with her company. I want Diggle to find whatever he’s searching for because Oliver Queen casts a long shadow. Oliver’s light should illuminate the man Diggle helped mold rather than blind him. Diggle will see Oliver clearly again when he sees himself clearly again.

The Newbies

Does anyone understand why Oliver is apologizing so much? What in the sweet mother of freaking Moses did he do that requires this much apologizing? 

Source:olivergifs

Dinah and Rene finally cough up a sort of apology and admit to admiring Oliver, but only after he apologies to them for what feels like the tenth time. Why did it take so long to get here? The simple answer is a 23 episode season and there couldn’t be “peace” until the final episode. But there is very little difference between Oliver’s apology in 6x10 to his apology now.

The newbies acted like entitled, whiny and violent brats for the better part of the season. Suddenly flipping the off switch to their petulant behavior and offering Oliver a couple measly compliments doesn’t get it done for me. 

There wasn’t even a conversation with Curtis, which can be viewed one of two ways. 1) He’s not a blip on Oliver Queen’s radar screen and the character doesn’t rate a conversation or 2) The writers are blind to Curtis’ abhorrent behavior and think he has nothing to apologize for which is INSANITY.

These people do not deserve Oliver Queen’s selflessness, but he didn’t do it because they deserved it. Oliver did it because the newbies needed protection. It says far more about Oliver’s character than it does theirs.  

My sincerest hope is they feel an extreme amount of guilt and realize what jackasses they are. Their finger pointing, fits, and fighting all contributed to Oliver ending up in jail. Rene’s betrayal is the primary reason the FBI zeroed in on Oliver in the first place. The newbies have a massive uphill climb to redemption and I remain skeptical the damage done to the characters can be repaired. Time will tell.

Stray Thoughts

Oliver giving up his happy life with Felicity and William, a life without the mask, just sets up his endgame even more (or what I think will be his endgame).

I’m hoping there’s more to this “deal” Oliver made with Watson. Maybe some undercover work like my buddy @callistawolf suggested.

Anatoly’s excuse for missing the raid is Big Belly Burger. That is all kinds of awesome. Never change Anatoly.

Longbow hunters mention! Hello Season 7 villains!

Quentin should list L*urel as “Evil L*urel” in his phone to help him tell the difference BECAUSE THERE IS A FREAKING DIFFERENCE.

“Or L*urel dies a second time.” YOU CAN ONLY DIE ONCE YOU TWATWAFFLES. THIS WOULD BE THE FIRST DEATH FOR THIS L*UREL BECAUSE SHE IS A DIFFERENT L*UREL.

“I gotta say they are a lot easier to operate when they aren’t being hacked.” I love this perfect cup of fruit salad.

Rene did make me cry with that goodbye call to his kid.

How stupid are you FBI agent? You don’t stand there and look at the fire as it comes blazing toward you. WE CALLED THESE GUYS FOR HELP? WHY????

“From what Oliver tells me she’s not even your daughter.” Don’t you love how on Oliver’s “I was wrong about everything” tour he sticks to “BS is not L*urel and she is evil.”  Awesomesauce.

“Would you be taking this risk with our L*urel or was this the kind of risk that got her killed in the first place?” Quentin needs to rewatch Season 4 because it was time for LL to go.

Oliver stops Diaz with a few measly punches and IT SHOULD HAVE HAPPENED WEEKS AGO.

The FBI didn’t help very much. Oliver and Felicity figured out a way to get the list of all Diaz’s city officials. Watson brought some man power to the raid on the precinct, which Oliver could have gotten from the many superhero shows he’s launched. Furthermore, I thought the whole point to expanding the team was so that Oliver had help. So, why are these dingbat newbies around if they can’t take down a couple cops?

Sara & BS scene only bolstered my belief that BS belongs on Legends of Tomorrow. 

Disclaimer: Any gifs on the blog are not mine. If you would like a gif removed from my reviews, please message me. 6x23 gifs credited.

I have a couple polls up that I would love your feedback on! Please check them out and VOTE!

[katherine-mcnamara]

Hi Dev, I just wanted to say I hope you're doing okay and how you were doing with the long COVID? I had it recently and I'm still recovering. Also, would you mind posting an update on how many comms you have and what you're working on just so I can see when I want to commission you? I'm getting some money soon but I also want to make sure you're okay and not putting too much pressure on you! Have a great day and I hope you're well!

I'm also still recovering but slowly getting there so thank you so much for the well wishes and I'm sending you all the love and well wishes and hope you are taking care of yourself and getting lots of rest!

Right now I'm backed up because of being so sick so this list is a lot bigger than it usually is bc im a few months behind thanks rona, which is why i'm not advertising my comms rn (and havent since january) but if people are willing to be patient I'm more than willing to make them gifs.

Also I'm about to head to bed so excuse me being lazy and just copying the list of ones from this chunk aka ones posted in the last month and ones to be posted within the next month strikethrough means posted (for public) or delivered (for private)

Coco Jones in Bel-Air  Simone Joy Jones in Bel-Air  Jonathan Rhys Meyers in Dracula Julia Garner in Inventing Anna Pierre Niney in Un Homme Ideal Pierre Niney in Amants  Lili Reinhart in Riverdale 6x05  Lili Reinhart in Riverdale 6x06 Lili Reinhart in Riverdale 6x09 Lili Reinhart in Riverdale 6x10 Nishi Munshi in Lethal Weapon  Skyler Gisondo in Booksmart  Skyler Gisondo in Santa Clarita Diet 3x06 - 3x10  Alex Meraz in The Walking Dead  Harvey Guillen in What We Do in the Shadows  Ella Rae-Smith in Into The Badlands S03 Remy Hii in Marco Polo S1 & S2 Caio Castro in Novo Mundo Zeeko Zaki in FBI (All 4 Seasons) Tanner Buchanan in Cobra Kai S04 Jamie Campbell Bower in City of Bones Charlie Day in I Want You Back Keon Alexander in The Expanse Marina Moschen in Deus Salve o Rei Owen Teague in The Stand & The Empty Man  Oka Giner in The Five Juanas  Anya Taylor Joy in The Queens Gambit  Alexander Ludwig in Vikings S03  Alexander Ludwig in Vikings S04 Gemma Forsyth in Mako Mermaids S02  Mike Faist in Panic Mike Faist in West Side Story Andy Bean in Transfer Matthew McNulty in Three Musketeers Tamzin Merchant in The Tudors Lily James in War & Peace Ivana Baquero in The Shannara Chronicles S1 & S2 Kumail Nanjiani in Eternals Snitchery (youtuber) in Various Videos Iman Fandi (youtuber) in Various Videos Hallea Jones in Locke & Key S1 & S2 Nico Tortorella in The Walking Dead: World Beyond S1 & S2 Alexa Mansour in The Walking Dead: World Beyond S1 & S2 André Lamoglia in Elite Peter Vack in Consent Diego Boneta in Die In A Gunfight Tunji Kasim in Nancy Drew S3 Xu Kai in Falling Into Your Smile Sophie Turner in Heavy Katie Stevens in The Bold Type (All Seasons) Tala Ashe in Legends of Tomorrow (All Episodes) Melisa Asli Pamuk in Carpisma Melisa Asli Pamuk in Hayaller ve Hayatlar Jaylen Barron in Blindspotting Charithra Chandran in Bridgerton S02 Simone Ashley in Bridgerton S02 Natasha Lyonne in Russian Doll S02 Rachel Bilson in Take Two Hayden Christensen in Outcast Norman Reedus in The Walking Dead S04 Yang Yang in You Are My Glory episode 4 - 7 Kalama Epstein in No Good Nick Season 2 Peter Vack in I Believe in Unicorns Damaris Lewis in Titans

[themostrandomfandom]

Hey JJ! What are your favorite episodes of Glee Brittana wise and why?

Hey, @tryingtoohardddd!

Unsuprisingly, my answer got wordy. I put everything under the cut.

______

My top five favorite Brittana episodes are:

6x06 “What the World Needs Now” because it is the closest Glee ever comes to giving us top quality Brittana fanfiction played out on screen. The characterizations for both girls are so spot on, and especially in the hallway scene, which, in addition to providing a perfect reversal to the Hurt Locker scene in episode 2x15, also presents us with some of the best-conceptualized Brittana dialogue and cute, flirty Brittana interactions of the entire series. Throughout the episode, Naya and Heather’s performances hit on all sorts of levels: Brittany’s exasperation with her parents and zany Queso Por Dos trolling with Alma are pure comedy gold, while Santana’s heartfelt confrontation with Alma in the auditorium makes me cry, and the courage and resolve that both girls show in standing up for their love are enough to make me want to leap out of my chair and cheer because THOSE ARE MY GIRLS and LOOK AT HOW FAR THEY’VE COME. While the episode does contain some logistical plot holes, the Brittana in and of itself is about as close to perfect as possible. There’s angst and fluff, heartbreak and triumph, but most of all, just so much love. This episode is all about Brittana coming full circle. They started off as two girls who, due to the potential consequences of speaking up, were afraid to admit how much they wanted each other. In this episode, they show how they have grown into two women who are willing to fight for their love, no matter what may come of them doing so, because, to them, the most important thing is just being with each other. 

2x15 “Sexy” because, on a personal level, this is The Brittana Episode for me, the one that pulled me in and made me ship these two cheerleaders with everything in my little fangirl heart. Then, on a more universal level, because it is also just so pivotal. When it comes to Brittana, the entire timeline can be divided according to episode 2x15—the before and the after. It is their watershed, the moment they went from background to foreground, the love declaration heard ‘round the world. The Sacred Sexy Sharing Circle started it, “Landslide” kept it going, and then the Hurt Locker hit it home. To this day, Naya Rivera’s performance in that scene remains the single most affecting thing I’ve ever witnessed in any episode of any television show ever, and I continue to find new significance in the bravery of Brittany’s actions every time I examine her behavior from her “I think we should talk to somebody” line on. Everything that Brittana eventually achieve and become all traces back to what they do here. Ultimately, their whole narrative arc on the show has its basis in those four little words: “I just want you.”

6x03 “Jagged Little Tapestry” because the bedroom scene alone is worth the price of admission, and then there is also a marriage proposal on top of it. As with episode 6x06, this episode reads like really, really super good fanfiction. The dialogue between Brittana in the bedroom is some of the best in the whole show, and Santana’s proposal to Brittany and Brittany’s reaction to it are so incredibly heartfelt and pure. Way back when episode 2x04 originally aired, if someone had come to me and said, “In five years, there will be a Glee episode in which you see Brittany S. Pierce and Santana Lopez cuddling in bed together, trading on-the-lips kisses, making pillow talk about how happy they are, and promising to love each other until infinity. Oh yeah, and later in the episode, they’ll get engaged,” I would have laughed them right off the internet, because back then I couldn’t have imagined that Glee would ever develop Brittana to such a point or to give us fans so much cause to celebrate. But this episode made that stuff happen—live! and in technicolor!—and it did so so deftly, with such nuance, feeling, and heart. For years, I had gotten used to Heya delivering quality Brittana IN SPITE OF poor Glee writing and a lack of narrative focus. This episode gave us an A+ Heya performance PLUS the excellent writing and narrative focus to support and highlight what they enacted. It’s Brittana the way it always should have been, and it just feeds into S6 being my favorite Brittana season overall.

5x12 “100” because after the kick in the teeth that was S3 and the harder kick in the teeth that was S4 and the even harder kick in the teeth that was the beginning part of S5, and after Brittany not graduating, Brittana breaking up, Bram happening, Dantana happening, and, oh yeah, that little part where Heather Morris left the show and no one knew if she would ever be back, suddenly, SUDDENLY, there was this episode, and it was so unexpectedly wonderful that, all at once, the fandom had hope again. Brittana supporting each other regardless of their current relationship status is my jam, so I love seeing Santana try to cheer Brittany up and help her access her creativity again. “Valerie” 2.0 is one of the cutest, dorkiest performances in all of Glee, and the way Brittany responds to Santana just reaffirms how deep their bond runs. Plus, this episode has some of the best Brittany dialogue, hands down. Her speech to Santana in the choir room is incredible—the kind of great writing that I thought Glee had forgotten how to produce after the Hurt Locker. And then there is That Kiss™. Again, if someone had told me way back in S2 that someday we’d get to see a Brittana kiss like that one, I’d never have believed it. This episode really is the precursor to all the Brittana goodness we’re treated to in S6.

2x19 “Rumours” because it is the quintessential Back Six episode from S2. At this point, Brittana want each other so badly, but they’re both still so afraid—Brittany that Santana won’t fight for her, Santana of the consequences of being true to herself. Still, through everything, it is clear that they love each other so much, almost more than they can stand. The Blurt Locker, nose-booping, promposal, and Revert Locker are all such monumental Brittana developments, and “Songbird” is an experience all of its own, one so moving and intimate that, to this day, I can only bring myself to watch it about once a year because anything more than that feels like an intrusion. This episode’s sweetest moments are so tender and affecting, while its angstiest moments are so heart-rending and poignant. The “soulmates” exchange hurts like a motherfucker, and yet it also provides hope because while JBI is asking Santana about Karofsky, it couldn’t be clearer who her answer is really about.

Thanks for the question! 

[thepirateandhisson]

- Once Upon a Time, 6x06 “Dark Waters” 

Happy Father’s Day to Killian Jones from his step-son Henry, who has unending faith in him.

[travllingbunny]

The 100 6x06 Memento Mori

Another late review from me, putting in one place all my thoughts about episode 6x06, from things that everyone has talked and posted gifs about a lot (like Bellamy’s emotional state) and had different stances on (such as, how you feel about Murphy and his character arc), to things that haven’t been discussed much (like some of my thoughts on the Flame and the Sheidheda plotline).

In the end, I talk a bit about my expectations and predictions for episode 6x07, Nevermind, which many will see tonight, and that I’ll get to watch tomorrow, and the following episodes.

I have huge expectations for Nevermind, but Memento Mori was a great set-up. I have to say, much as I loved other things in the episode (particularly grieving, emotional Bellamy and the hardest decision he ever had to make), my enjoyment of the episode rose by about 100% because of the last scene. Sometimes you don’t need to be surprised by a TV show: sometimes a reveal is something you expect and enjoy all the more when it finally happens. And oh, did it deliver. The scene was amazing, with the dreamy atmosphere, cinematography, the introduction to Clarke’s mind-wall (the prop department really outdid themselves with this one!), and the wonderful music. The 100 always has great, on-point musical choices, and this season has been one of the best in that regard.

Eliza Taylor continued to be amazing – maybe even better this episode than in 6x05, as Josephine was openly Josephine in front of some characters, continued to pretend to be Clarke in several others, with varying degrees of effort and success, and intentionally put on a pseudo-Clarke persona in front of someone who already knew she wasn’t Clarke, just to mess with his mind (the last one was reserved for Bellamy). While Josephine’s Clarke-act was absolutely terrible in 6x05 – because she didn’t even know almost anything about Clarke, so she was making blunders left and right – this time (after learning a lot about her from Murphy) she was, at times, a little more convincing and almost approached some version of Clarkeness, but this only produced the Uncanny Valley effect: it was like a skewed, caricatured version of Clarke and felt really, really creepy.

One such moment of Josephine playing a skewed version of Clarke was when she was fooling Raven, Emori and Echo. She was putting on Clarke’s serious, concerned look and tone of voice (Murphy must have coached her on all of that), but her phrasing at times still should have alerted them to her flippant attitude – as when she said that the whole murder and bodysnatching thing really lit a fire in Bellamy. Maybe that hint was too subtle - it was similar to her line “the Kane problem”, which Abby noticed, but Abby is Clarke’s mother after all and knows her better. Echo was surprised that Bellamy supposedly left by himself, not just that he didn’t ask her, but also that “Clarke” let Bellamy go by himself with the foraging party – but she was more concerned with Bellamy’s safety than she stopped to think much of Clarke’s behavior (and after all, she doesn’t know her that well compared to most others).

Josephine also used the same argument she tried to sell Bellamy in 6x04 and that served as more confirmation to him that she was not really Clarke – the whole “we have all done bad things, what right do we have to judge them, so let’s just do nothing and let the bodysnatchers continue doing their awful thing”. Real Clarke feels guilty and is critical of her own actions, but doesn’t start criticizing all of her friends unprompted and talking about how they’ve all done awful things, and certainly not in order to justify tolerating evil actions of someone else! But JosephineClarke’s argument is actually one that I have seen in the fandom – this idea that “there are no good guys”, that everyone is a villain, that Clarke and Bellamy and the rest of them are just as bad as the Mountain Men or the Primes (with some BS equations between completely different things such as “well, they all murdered innocent people” – so, apparently, defending yourself and your loved ones, the only way you can, from an evil overlord society in the process of horribly killing you to use your body parts, is exactly the same as brainwashing people into worshiping you as gods and stealing their bodies because you think you’re superior and should live forever!)… so therefore, they don’t have the right to fight against evil. After all, fighting evil also makes you do things like kill people, so why do anything? Just keep your head down and don’t do anything. But the show has (in the Abby/Jackson conversation in 6x05) addressed the fact that doing nothing and letting evil happen is as bad as doing evil. And there is something incredibly meta about Josephine, the show’s villain masquerading as the show’s hero Clarke, cynically uttering these lines to deceive our protagonists and make them complacent about the horrible things she and her family are dong, just as the same morally bankrupt argument is used by some fans to defend the show’s villains.

(In this episode, we learned even more (directly and through Xavier) about how awful the Sanctum society is – in addition to the fact they bodysnatch the hosts, they call people without the Nightblood gene (who therefore cannot happen to have Nightblood children) “nulls”. Nulls are not allowed to have children and get to do the lowest jobs, and there is also the sacrifice to the trees in the Offering Grove – which is apparently also “voluntary”, in the sense of people being brainwashed by a cult to sacrifice themselves.)

Bellamy never bought that this was really Clarke, and that Clarke would argue in favor of tolerating murder and bodysnatching, but Raven and the others swallowed it. It seemed to play right into Raven’s recent conviction that Clarke is not feeling guilty over anything and is just putting on an act, and into her self-righteous streak, which was in full force, even worse than before. Do I even have to point out the ridiculousness of Raven’s line that, unlike Clarke, she never did anything she regrets? I could start listing (as many of us have over the past week) facts such as: Raven tortured Lincoln with electroshocks, Raven tried to turn Murphy over to the Grounders to be murdered by prolonged torture for a crime that Finn had committed, Raven tried to get Clarke to kill Lexa and start a war over Finn even though that would have gotten many people killed including Clarke, Raven withheld medication from dying children because of rationing (and felt horrible about it), Raven made Clarke make a list of 100 people who would get to survive in Arkadia – while simultaneously bashing Clarke over it (“choosing who lives or dies is your specialty”), Raven gave Echo an OK to kill Shaw at one point, Raven participated in many of the hard and problematic things Clarke and the others had to do – blowing up Grounders on the bridge, burning 300 Grounders who had attacked them, etc., Raven was OK with potentially killing Raven left Clarke behind to die (and Clarke ended up alone on the deserted planet for 6 years as a result) and was ready to leave Bellamy, Monty, Emori and Murphy to die in the season 5 finale… Some of these things I don’t consider wrong under the circumstances, some of these were just one of the two bad choices – but that’s also true of most of the things Clarke has done. Being angry at Clarke for her recent betrayal is something I expected and was perfectly fine with, but being as hypocritical as Raven is now, that is really annoying. So what is going on with Raven now? Like many others, I haven’t enjoyed her characterization in season 6. It’s one of the few things I didn’t like this season. Murphy has also had his annoying moments, but he also has a real storyline, one that’s not just about being mean to Clarke. Raven currently does not. But maybe, as I’ve been hoping, this is all building up to a real character development and some sort of soul-searching. We have had many indications that Raven actually feels guilty and unworthy deep inside – Sinclair’s remarks to her in season 3, Shaw’s message “Tell Raven that she deserves happiness” – and that her high horse attitude is just a cover. I hope this is something that season 6 gets to really explore and resolve.

On the other hand, it was much more enjoyable to see Raven turning her anger and moral outrage at someone who really does deserve it – one of the Primes. And since Ryker is not a sociopath or narcissist, and does have the capacity for compassion and remorse, Raven’s words are, hopefully, going to make him rethink everything and realize he can’t go on like that. He’s been raised since teenage years and surrounded by people telling him that it’s OK to move from body to body and see others sacrifice themselves for you, but he’s over 200 years old and responsible for his own choices. And feeling sorry about hurting people is really meaningless if you go on and do the same thing again, without any intention to change. That makes you a hypocrite like Russell and Simone with their “thank you for your sacrifice” mantra said while murdering people who definitely didn’t make a choice to sacrifice themselves.

Speaking of which – Josephine really is devoid of any deeper feeling for pretty much anyone other than herself.  We already saw it when she killed her “best friend” Kaylee Lee, but that was supposed to be a permanent death. Now she managed to convince her mother to wipe the entire Lee family. (Interesting that she referred to Russell as being led by the heart. The show is again going with the pseudo-parallel between Russell and Simone and Bellamy and Clarke, as in the parallel Power Couple shots in 6x03). Bye bye, four of the Primes, including one we got to know a bit better. I can’t say I feel sorry, since I think all the mind drives will have to be destroyed by the end of this season, so a definite end would be put to bodysnatching. Now there are 8 more Primes who are “alive”, but two of them are still just on the mind-drives and out of commission (the two members of Miranda’s family, whom we haven’t seen in the present), and Josephine got 4 empty mind-drives. She gave two as payment to Murphy for his part in coaching her to fool Abby and getting the others (mostly Bellamy) to decide not to take revenge for Clarke, she promised Abby one for Kane, and it still leaves one. But the other Primes would certainly not be happy if they found out about all these things – now it’s not just the fact that Russell and Simone skipped the line for their daughter, when Miranda’s loved one was next, but also that they permanently killed four of the Primes. A good way to defeat the Primes would be to start by turning them against each other. Just saying.

Abby and Murphy are two characters whose current role and actions are pretty controversial at the moment and that fans disagree on. Both of them are the most convenient target for Josephine to corrupt and get on her side due to their current issues. With Abby, the debates are mostly about whether she has realized that Josephine is not really Clarke, and is just playing along and planning to wake the people on the ship, or if she really has been fooled, which many hold against her. I’m really not completely sure, even after watching the episode twice and replaying the last shot of the scene between Abby and JC. Abby did indeed notice several weird things about “Clarke” and seemed on the brink of realizing the truth, but that time, Josephine really went for the jugular and used all the cards Murphy has taught her to play: guilt over her addiction, over cannibalism and the Dark Year, turning Jake over, failing Kane due to her addiction and indirectly causing his injury/death by indulging Vinson because of her addiction, her idealization of Kane which is a result of both love and guilt, and even her relationship with Clarke – the last card JC used was telling “her mom” that she cannot lose her. But during the hug, as we saw their faces, Josephine was not the only one who didn’t look like a loving family member: Abby’s weird, blank look could be read in different ways. And I’m sure this is exactly what the show is going for, ambiguity. We’ll probably only be sure in two episodes. Abby’s face almost made me believe the theory that she’s just pretending, but at the same time, it would be too easy if she simply goes to the ship to wake an army to come to Sanctum. Or maybe she almost knows it, but doesn’t want to admit it to herself? At the same time, Raven definitely still doesn’t know that Clarke is dead, and if Abby hasn’t figured it out, she still won’t learn it for some time.

On the other hand, it’s pretty clear where Murphy stands and what he wants, but fans seem divided over whether it makes him a bad guy, whether they hate him, and whether it is in character. I think it definitely is, and shouldn’t be surprising. Murphy certainly genuinely wants immortality – he straight up told Bellamy in 6x05 that he finds the idea appealing. While he’s always been motivated by his own survival, it used to be all about trying not to die any time soon. I don’t think it would have extended to wanting to live forever – until he died this season and saw what he thinks is “hell”. I don’t know if we’ll ever learn what he saw, or if it will remain a mystery, and just used to motivate him. His fear of going to hell is driving him, and, of course, he wants Emori as his eternal companion. (That sounded like something from vampire fiction, which is weird.) Now, that doesn’t mean that Murphy doesn’t also care about Bellamy, Raven and the others, including Clarke. I do think he was sad to learn of her ‘death’, but, of course, his reaction was never going to be as strong as Bellamy’s or Madi’s. He would only feel that way if Emori died. But keep in mind that Murphy doesn’t know that Clarke is still alive and can be brought back. From his point of view, there is no use in antagonizing the Sanctum people, and risking the lives of Bellamy, Raven, Echo, Jordan etc. and of course, Emori and himself, just to avenge someone who’s already dead. And he’s never been a person with deep ethical convictions who would care deeply about the morality of bodysnatching in general, or the lives of unknown people who mean nothing to him. I do think he cares about his friends, and that he wasn’t just doing what he needed to do for immortality, but what he thought he had to do to protect them, even from themselves –as I’m sure he thought while he was trying to manipulate Bellamy. Now, when he finds out that Clarke can be brought back, it’s only then that he will really be put into a dilemma to choose between friends and immortality/fear of death.

What can I say about Bellamy in this episode that hasn’t been said by so many other people already, both in reviews and meta and in hundreds of gifsets and videos? Even the released script pages confirmed what was so obvious. This was a great Bellamy episode, and Bob Morley’s best performance this season. While I have enjoyed most of Bellamy’s arc over seasons 5 and 6 (just as every other season), and while I disagree with fans who claim that we haven’t seen Bellamy be emotional since season 4 (he had a lot of emotional, angry, hurt, passionate, happy moments over the course of the second half of season 5), we haven’t seen this kind of outbreak of emotion in a very long time. We can only imagine how Bellamy grieved for Clarke after Praimfaya, but I think this was even worse for him – because it wasn’t her choice and her heroic act this time – she was murdered (as far as he knows), and because, after learning to love on, he got Clarke back and lost her again, just as they had finally fully emotionally reunited. And to make things so much worse, he has to look at this person who is nothing like Clarke, mocking him by walking around in Clarke’s body. Bellamy’s arc in this episode was all about his pain, grief and despair, and the way he had to be strong and reign in his anger and desire for revenge, for justice, for something other than having to be there among people responsible for these her death. I love the fact that, even shackled and tied, he managed to tear Josephine’s self-portrait. On top of it, he had to endure Josephine messing by propos(ison)ing him to “help each other get through it” (hmm) while putting on a pseudo-Clarke soft, caring face and voice (which felt so fake, like a caricature) – which made him turn around because he couldn’t even look at her. She could have almost killed him there, and I don’t even know what he would have done if she had tried, but Murphy saved him through his and JC’s manipulation of both him and Russell.

Was JC’s lack of concern over her daddy’s life just because she expected Bellamy to back down from killing him, or did she expect him to kill Russell? I tend to think she thought he wouldn’t kill him, but wasn’t too worried if he did. In any case, I can’t imagine how difficult it must have been for Bellamy to decide to spare Russell and also agree to not take any actions against him and the Primes. And just like after Praimfaya, he decided to do “What Clarke would do” and what she would want him to do after her death – survive and try to keep all of their people alive.

Now, was their decision the right one? I think that deciding not to act out of revenge, prioritize that over survival and protecting people who are still alive, and especially, deciding not to get a lot of other people killed, was absolutely the right decision, and what Clarke would also do. Clarke could do all sorts of crazy and extreme things to protect her loved ones, but she never killed anyone out of revenge. However, that doesn’t mean that going along with the Primes is the right thing. Standing by and letting evil happen is not “being a good guy”. The Primes will keep killing and oppressing people and treating them like cattle if they are not stopped. And I don’t think Bellamy being for that in the long run. But right now, I think he feels defeated and has lost the will to live, rather than just survive and ensure his people’s survival. But everything will change when he finds out that Clarke is alive and can be brought back.

In the meantime, I really want to see Jordan’s reaction. He was MIA in this episode, but I don’t think he will be happy to play nice with the Primes, not just because of Delilah but also because he does have a strong moral compass and was horrified about bodysnatching.

Is anyone still pretending that Bellamy and Clarke are just BFFs? That’s a question I keep asking throughout the show. I’m sure that, if someone were to see just this episode out of the show, they would definitely conclude that Clarke was Bellamy’s girlfriend (wife?) that he is really in love with, while Echo is his good friend who works for him and may have a crush on him. Come to think of it, 90% of the show makes it look like that. He never seemed to think of his actual girlfriend while being broken up over Clarke, and Murphy never brought her up as a motivation for Bellamy to forego revenge and focus on his own survival and the reasons he has to live. Echo gave him a brief hug to try to comfort him, but Bellamy still left to grieve all by himself, away from all of them. He also once again rejected Echo’s suggestion (she assumed they would go and fight the Sanctum people) and instead chose the “What would Clarke do?” course of action.

At this point, I’m sure that the show is intentionally portraying their relationship like that, since it’s done that consistently, especially comparing Bellamy’s relationships with Clarke and Echo all season 6 – and the scenes where Echo gets some long-overdue character development have all been when she’s away from Bellamy.  Echo figuring out that Clarke has been bodysnatched – not through JC’s behavior, as Bellamy, but based on other evidence, such as how Jade behaved – didn’t end up contributing to the plot, as everyone else already knew about Clarke, so it was there probably just 1) to confirm that Echo is indeed smart and perceptive enough not to be duped, as a spy is supposed to be, and, I think 2) to develop her relationship with Jade. These two could have an interesting dynamic, as both are soldiers/spies who define themselves by following orders. Echo threatened to kill Jade’s “master”, and during the eclipse, Emori taunted her that she was still just following another master’s orders (Bellamy now being her ‘master’) and this seemed to resonate with her. At the same time, this time, Echo showed that she does have a compassionate streak when she mercy-killed the guard who was being slowly eaten by the trees in the Offering Grove, in spite of Jade’s protests. It puts her in a completely new kind of dynamic – Jade is like an even more single-minded version of her old self. The fact that Echo didn’t kill Jade and instead promised to come back (she has to do it soon, though, before the trees get too deep into Jade!) suggests we’ll see more of that dynamic.

Bellamy had the hard task to tell Madi the news of her mother’s death. But Madi is the one person who is definitely not going to play nice and who doesn’t want to restrain her desire to “burn the whole place down” for revenge. The question I’ve seen brought up is, is the Sheidheda arc even necessary to motivate her? Isn’t an angry teenage girl with a head full of dead Commanders, most of whom believed in the “Blood must have blood” mantra, already enough? I think that Madi is going to take some extreme actions, or we are supposed to be afraid of what extreme actions she must take, and that this is why they wanted to give her an extra push – and another plot about “facing your demons”, with Sheidheda as a “devil on her shoulder” character.

The existence of Sheidheda also poses the question, why is it that the Grounders think that having the Flame in your head is a good thing for the next Commander, when at least one of the voices inside is one they fear and consider evil? When Titus said that the Flame makes the good and the bad in a person stronger – it is because Commanders literally have different voices, good and bad, inside their head. But really, how beneficial has the Flame “wisdom” proven to be, even without Sheidheda? Almost every time we learned about advice of past Commanders (with the exception of Lexa's in 5x12), and that wasn't often, it didn't seem to be good or useful advice. In 3x06, Lexa said that the past Commanders were upset with her new path of choosing to forego war and revenge. (Was it really all of them? Including Becca?) In 5x13, Clarke thought for a moment that Madi got the wise advice to not kill the prisoners of war from the Flame - but she didn't, she got it from Bellamy.  And there's something about the Flame that never made sense and still hasn't been explained. It was created by Becca to help humanity by passing on knowledge and wisdom... and Becca was the first Commander. So how come Grounders managed to forget all about technology and history before the apocalypse? That never made sense even without the Flame. With it, and Becca's memories, they should have known even more about science and technology than the Mountain Men, and that could have helped defeat them. Mount Weather people were descendants of the US government employees, and some of them may have been great scientists, but Becca was a genius scientist. How did they instead turn into a medieval-level technology warrior society that worships violence and revenge? Something must have gone horribly wrong. And the only explanation seems to be Second Dawn, which seems to be behind the Grounder religion, and probably their world view as well. (That reveal really explained a lot.)

After we found out about Sheidheda from the trailer, there was some speculation to the effect of "since Grounder culture favors violence, war and revenge, what could have set this one guy apart, to the point that he is considered the Dark Commander?" From what we learned in this episode, Sheidheda was Chaotic Evil, whereas most Commanders were trying to stick to the tradition and were being either Lawful Neutral or Lawful Evil or somewhere in between. This guy apparently said, Screw tradition, killed his mentor, and actually did whatever the hell he wanted. And, well, killing your Flamekeepers, no doubt, the exact thing that would make the Flamekeepers talk of you as a dark, terrifying presence. Flamekeepers are mentors to the Commanders who want to maintain control and influence over the charges, even if they are technically supposed to be their subjects.  And what Sheidheda said about killing your mentor before they kill you.... he may have had a point? Not about Gaia, of course, but we've seen that with Titus and Lexa. He did try to control her, taught her toxic views like "Love is weakness", which are apparently generally a part of Flamekeeper teachings. He got upset when someone else - Clarke - started influencing Lexa with ideas contrary to his traditionalist Grounder ideas such as “Blood msut have blood”… and, well, he did kill his Commander, not intentionally, but it happened as an almost direct result of his desire to maintain his control over her and her views and political actions.

The B-plot with Octavia, Diyoza and Xavier had some big revelations in this episode, with the healing power of the sap from the withered trees, the temporal flare from last episode that has apparently withered Octavia’s arm and made it look like she is 150 years old (which, come to think of it, is roughly her chronological age) and the mysterious spirals that are signs of the Anomaly calling to her and Diyoza, as it apparently once called to Xavier. Now, some people speculate that Xavier is Gabriel, but I don’t believe that. His personality is nothing like Gabriel’s, from what we’ve seen of Gabriel so far, and I imagine Gabriel is even more guilty and sad these days – nothing like Xavier’s lively, snarky personality.  I don’t think we’ll see these characters in 6x07, but (spoiler – if you consider titles of future episodes spoilers) we should learn what the Anomaly is in 6x08. I expect the bodysnatching story to be wrapped up in season 6, but I think this plot with the anomaly offers a lot of different possibilities, with its time-warping theme, and may continue to be addressed in season 7, kind of like the City of Light was set up in season 2 but fully developed in season 3.

The last scene was a perfect intro into the upcoming episode 6x07. I have huge expectations, because I have been wishing for a Clarke-centric, character-based episode like that for a long time. I love psychological SciFi stories, and Clarke fighting Josephine in her mind, while dealing with her own demons and her own past, seems like a dream. I must say, while it’s been fun analyzing and identifying various scenes and characters from the drawings from the walls of Clarke’s mind-space and various lines that were heard on top of each other and half-drowned in music, most of these are just Easter Eggs for hardcore fans. What matters most is what the show focuses on. In this episode (ignoring the sneak peeks), the scene focused on the drawing of Abby (as we heard lines from the very first scene of the show), then Lexa, and then Bellamy, which was an interesting choice. But I hope people don’t get too distracted by questions such as “which characters will be referenced and how many times”, “which past actors will have cameos”, etc. I don’t want the episode to be a clip show – I would love references to everything that has impacted Clarke, but what’s important is that it is all for the purpose of Clarke’s character development, her emotional state, her ability to fight her own demons and decide that she really wants to live and deserves happiness. And for her to be able to fight Josephine and signal Bellamy others that she is still there.

Rating: 9/10