#5 YEARS AGO?!?! ims cared
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i miss putting together concept-type playlists i dont do that much anymore
this is my best playlist imo i think ive talked abt it before but i mde it wow so many years ago after watching brick 2005 (kind of a noir detective film but everyones a teenager. proto riverdale)
#so it has all tehse 2000s pop or rock songs and then#jazz lounge and techno#5 YEARS AGO?!?! ims cared
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idk what discourse dimension some of you "fandom elders" are stuck in, but in my ~15 years in online (and sometimes irl) fandom spaces, this is the golden age for me
shipping wars have literally always existed and acting like we all used to hold hands and sing kumbaya is insane. "well, there wasnt this moral component thats soooo annoying these days" okay but thats worse. you do see how thats worse, right? people used to tell each other to kill themselves over zutara vs kataang and then not even care when people were racist. twice as mad for reasons half as reasonable. also, where were you all in 2015-2019? that was the era of "steven universe is fascism apologism" and "i headcanon these characters as found family, so its incest to ship them". now shipping "drama" is like "oh i broke mutuals with them after they wrote smut of this child character being assaulted by their parent", which is actually just a normal response
wondering what torment nexus some of you are trapped in where fandom has gotten more toxic? hope you can escape soon, because im having a ball out here in a world where biphobia is seen as a bigger problem than a ship being dumb
#csa mention#incest mention#like. just a vague example but ive been asked to tag any and all mentions so i feel this counts?#i see a ship i hate and i keep my mouth shut and expect everyone else to give me the same respect when i post ships they might not like#do i bitch about fandom sometimes here and there? absolutely. would i prefer a return to how fandom was even just 5 years ago?#gun to my head you could not make me#like. im a w*ll stan. i have Seen Some Things and i have gotten upset by them. but thats just how every large social experience is#if its something you care about... youre gonna have opinions and so will everyone else#fandom will never be 100% chill and conflict-free. that doesnt mean i havent seen MASSIVE improvements in every#fandom ive been in over the years. its getting better overall everywhere ive gone. where are you all where its getting worse?
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#a doodley#okkk 2022: the torture chamber....i only sparsely drew al and developed talon (he was borned...) bc my mind was occupied with other things.#2023: exiting torture chamber; it took me a tiny little bit to get back to drawing and ''interacting with'' al again but i did it even#though it was a reminder of the Bad bc he's my copium#summer 2023: i view and witness media and suddenly have like 5 fictional men i cant decide on which to focus... and september (talon month)#comes along so I decide to focus on Talon after not touching him much at all throughout the entire year#(forced this btw i did not wanna do it LOL i didnt even remember how to draw him)#september 2023 to now: talon has infiltrated the brain. but i want to swivel back to al#now: i've forgotten how to Talk to al (just like i did in beginning of 2023)#(and just like i forgot how to talk to talon for most of 2023)#so ive kind of just been replaying the smunker cow al daydreams from when they first met#so I can find my way back...retracing my steps#in doing so ive kind of also forgotten how to interact with talon but still havent gotten back to al#so rn my life is so boring without imaginary bf interactions. just the before sleep plot rehashing daydreams...#or sparse visions of em Sometimes#nobody in my brain rn just like the short period last yr and its distressing#what do i draw without a love obsession.....#how do i pass time without it....! so boring. idk what to do#i miss the me of several yrs ago when i was drawing 50 different aus with al....ive downgraded in skill and imagination and creativity#so bad since then. idk. idk. i hope they come back to me soon#maybe i shld just draw al a lot which is how i kickstarted caring abt talon again almost a yr ago ?#hoping i can get him to come back before my surgery i need my big sexy boy nurse for recovery#(complaining abt things usually fixes em for me so im hoping thats the case here)
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i'm so normal about them (they consume my every thought)
#i care about them so much#theyre my childhood comfort ship#just finished whole cake and im about to catch up to where i left off 5 years ago#im too weak for lineart#do not say anything about the hands pls i beg#monkey d. luffy#roronoa zoro#zolu#zolu fanart#one piece#gear 5 luffy#my art <3
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Not me in my mid 30s in 2024 with this on my bedroom closet door
#it's been there a while i just forgot to post about it#tbh i gave up the whole aging my room up concept 5 years ago#when i decided to put up a robbie williams poster on the the door directly beside that poster#i do not care#🤣#merthur#merlin#arthur pendragon#im tagging for blog organization sorry everybody#i want to keep this post tagged 🤣
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let me COOK with this one also everybody clap at least the thumbnail isnt purple
#i posted the different sketchy thumbnails for this a couple hours ago but i deleted it after 5 minutes cause the colors were bad bad#i want to try smtg a little more realistic lighting wise but i just know the bags and the fridge will take me forever#i will get so fucking mad. i am prepared#i love the idea for this though im planning a few more illustrations with elias brooke and diamila of like casual vampirism#both to practice storytelling in illustrations and environments#this is my art improvement year i could care less about uni or my future we need to get to pro levels in time for artf*ght#wip
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BLOCKING s3 vol. 1 haters on sight i am. blocking you all ON FUCKING SIGHT!!! last season we had to deal with eskel being turned into a goddamn fucking tree and then wolf food and now with the MOST fun and MOST enjoyable and LEAST Actively Pissing On The Books season of twn since literally season one that came out before the FUCKING PANDEMIC you wanna HATE??? not having it NOT having it. we literally have the "jaskier being ciris fun uncle" content we craved post-s1 for three years and Geralt literally called him "jask" and you wanna be MEAN???? NOT on my feed no sir
#mine#the witcher#witcher#im making use of my entire reaction file for this#its mostly full of gifs i took from the big brother tag like 4-5 years ago#'but (sob) they aged up radovid and in the books he's (sniffle) he's-' and in the books eskel is alive and not a tree so WHO FUCKING CARES#ive blocked 3 people for being just unnecessarily mean abt s3 i do NOT need this negativity in my life#the witcher s3 spoilers
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old art of mine staring hasbin hollywood star rick dalton & silly stuntman cliff booth!!🫣🎬🎥
bonus no glasses cus i couldn’t choose which ones better:
#once upon a time in hollywood#rick dalton#cliff booth#i used to think about making this into a keychain lmfao but probably 5 people would buy it#i forget once upon a time was done in like 2019…..#five fuckn YEARS ago?! where’s my rick/cliff truthers at!!!!!!#they’re the bestest of friends that border the line of lovers real fuckin close#anyways uh🫣🫣 this is old and im just publishing stuff left and right no care in the world
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"When will we, as a fandom, understand that Alastor does not infact want the best for Charlie, nor does he want to be her dad"
What about you shut up and let people have some fun and enjoy the found family that's clearly shown in every episode
#hazbin hotel#you all sound like the people who teared up the poor person on reddit a few years ago#we are missing 5 months of shenanigans between them#why you cant believe he is able to care?#is because he is ace? because im 100% sure if he had been allosexual you wont be saying the same shit#you are putting him in the same level as Valentino for fucks sake#alastor is a demon with doubtful morals? absolutely#they are all in hell and he doesnt want to go to heaven#doesnt mean he cant care for anybody#it's confirmed Rosie is his friend#Mimsy still is#why Charlie cant?#and if he didnt want to help her he could have literally just dissapear
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yeah sure that's how i'll [re]come out
#zymart#zymtalk#rant in the tags ->#okay listen to me this is really important and also i have a witness. this was not intentionally supposed to be posted on june 1st#the stars just aligned for this to be at its funniest. which means its also easier for me to dismiss LOL#i drew this like a week ago after trying to draw a whole like. 5 page comic about it and then stopping it mid-board#bc it was horrifying imagining being perceived that much. so i needed to make it into a joke instead and this was the funniest route#and then i was like 'UGH. UGH!!!! i can not be 20 and deal with this like im 13. if i dont post it by the end of the week#then [the witness to all my rants on this topic. shoutout to twig bc they got the most of it] can joke abt it as if i did anyway'#and now its the end of the week and i looked at the date and went 'oh my god didnt may just start what happened'#'WAIT ITS JUNE FIRST. GOD. THATS TOO FUNNY TO NOT SAY SOMETHING' and who am i if i dont prioritize the bit honestly#in all honesty. kinda hate it! not bc of internalized homophobia but actually bc of internalized arophobia that has somehow been emphasized#after having my brain shift from '1000% aromantic without a doubt no exceptions' to 'just arospec ig lol??'#but tragically as it turns out. you can not just try and self analyze yourself into speedrunning closure.#horrible news for the oscar zymstarz community frankly#SO i needed a way 2 justify shoving this off my plate and into the trash as fast as possible.#im impatient and cant acknowledge my own emotions. its a flaw im working on it#oh and for all the ppl who know the running gag abt 'my allegations' [i do not have any real allegations for anyone not in jems server]:#that was in fact just a running gag for like well over a year and a half. like that was just a long running bit COMPLETELY unrelated to thi#i only started having this weird sexuality shift or whatever not too long ago lol. like long enough to go through 4 of the 5 stages of grie#[evidently bc like. im posting this. i got close enough to 5 to throw in the towel ykwim]#but on 'oscar zymstarz emotional acknowledgement' time that is....... not long.#but yeah ig tldr like. still ace [thank god] just arospec [probably demiro? i hate trying to figure out my own labels] instead of Aro now#idk none of this is that deep but also like it kinda is unfortunately bc i have to actually talk abt it to be able to ignore it ykwim#but i did! we're done talking abt it now! and now i can act like i dont care and try to make jokes about it to speedrun the rest of it#anyway. Happy Pride everyone. Fukign kitty.#side message to jem. by no means does this mean im not still gonna bully you. its a sign of love but also it is you specific bullying 🫶#you are not safe#edit: this is karma for saying 'thank god'. might be demiace too. this is the worst month of my life /j
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Crazy that astro bot is the only interesting exclusive game between xbox and PS too bad they had to shoot LBP in the head because as we know only 1 cute exclusive is allowed at a time
Great news for PC playeZZZGZGggzgzgzgGGRTTTTZZZTRGRGRGGGGGG <- being tased
#didn’t watch the game awards I’ll just check a recap later#I saw people posting little robot so I thought it got announced for pc#seems like it didn’t#anyway Xbox doesn’t really have exclusives anymore because Microsoft remembered they own windows like 5 years ago#so I suppose it’s not really a fair joke#but you get what i mean#im simply at a point where I only care about single player games and want them to run well goddamn#unreal engine EXPLODE. consistent framerate what’s that? no stutter what’s that?#no no guys the grease smeared on your screen so you can get 50 fps with dlss set to ultra performance is a Feature#this door texture is bigger than 90% of 2D games (the door texture does not fully load in until you are 2 feet away)#sorry the tags turned into unreal engine hater compilation
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damn it feels so good to actually have friends who i feel safe around. like to have friends who im not worried that if they find out that i like "cringe" things they wont judge me. woah!!
@angry-avaocardo @silly1xxx @gollyimsosoevil
#appreciation post for my besties✨✨#also the tags got reallylong and rambly just me complainign about the ex friend and a quick update so feell free not to read them if you#dont wanna#theres nothing of substance in there lol#ugh god my old friend the one i made the really long post about asking for advice#i probably mentioned this but i never felt safe to talk about things i like with them#oh god i would never be able to show them defrag#and i probably wouldnt even be willing to ramble about like. the arg or smth to them#id be too worried of them making fun of me#but also they had a way of making it so i hung out with them the most even tho i didnt want to#“me and friend are going to the canteen you two wanna come?”#“[with none of my input] no me and Charlie are staying here”#the only person i felt safe talking about my interests to was a friend that i made when trying to move away frrom the toxic one#a friend who they would consistently ask if i was replacing them with and was so fucking jealous of him#in fact that friend is gollyimsoevil yea that guy#hes great he likes gay addison shit so yk bestie#also they were so good at guilt tripping that now i use their guilt tripping tactics on myself to try and get myself to do things lol#and they would make fun of me so often but GOD FORBID I MAKE FUN OF THEM#they were making fun of me to another person a few /years/ ago so i made some snarky comment about them#because i was really upset by them making fun of me#and they brought it up to me like 2 months ago before we cut them off#like dude you mock and make fun of everything i do so much that ive just stopped talking and completely zoned out whenever im around you#and youre holding some snarky remark that i made when we were like 11 /because you were making fun of me/#UGH#oh ye update on that if anyone cares it went fine they seem to have moved on and are just hanging out with different people now#they havent made any attempt to contact any of us but also havent cut us off#i havent cut them off either ive just left it#i catch them giving me and the other two friends who used to be friends with them dirty looks#but i kinda just ignore it#i have like 5 friends my age who are much much much nicer than them
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in case anyone was wondering why i've been quieter this past week
#lennyrambles#my hands and back hurt like shit#im gonna be selling these goobers in my school's arts festival so#yay#i guess#im very tired#i dont care if this meme died 5 years ago i saw the opportunity and took it
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I work ok tje 17th Let me put let me out. Let me oouuuutttttt
#probBly the 18th as well but i dont actually know yet#but the 17th here will be the acgual time of chiak day..#Aell its okay bc i dont care bc i dont like him. So.#i liued imnsorry. i like gim#in other news: tomorrow i think is officiappy one year aince i started workijg my cirrent job so#im going to count my tip jar.. to see.. one full uear#last time.i cojnted ghere was 100 something hut that was a frw momths ago now#i dont rmbr exactly when..#but yaaaaay. counting. yaaaay#moneyyyy#also ghe csndle jar thing i have it ik is getting cramped and messy#bc i havent counged it in a while.so.i uavent Taken all.of.itput in a while so tjeres lile#a neat circle in ghe middle.and them i jusg stuck stuff after around it and it barely all fits#i need go invest in a second empty candle#Or actually d9 something with the money. <- not going to.happen#the only time.ibe ever used anu of it was times.i ran out of singles for bus fare#so id take one ftom thefe#That reminded me#Eafloer.i was tjinking like#itd be soooo much easier to get bus fare if i had a car...#bc its always a hassle bc i habe to wapk to tje bank and Dude the bank is never fuckint open#Aas a kid ur like oooohh the bank so.importsnt and adult..#and theyre open lile 20 minuyes a day. If this place is so damn importsnt why is it closed all ghe time#Nyways my point. i tjought that and then was like#.....If i had a car i woidpnt need bus fare at all bc i wouldnt have to take the bus#anyways th e bank is so annoying#closes at 5 on weekdays and i get home after 4 most days i work#and i also jist. dont geel like doing errands after worming all day#and Closed complefslu on sunday#and open from 9 am to noon on saturday like the fuck
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so funny to me that my classmates celebrate everyones birthdays in our thursday morning class and I just sit there like :3 they do not know I have a birthday too
#the pros of dual calendar is that tonight is the second night of hanukkah.. making it my birthday#like my gregorian calendar bday was 5 days ago but still#like they straight up never realized I already had a birthday this year and at this point Im waiting for them to notice#I will be barely 20 for as long as they dont ask and its very funny to me#like I dont really. care about showing up to class and being sung to and whatever#tbh the guy who did get sung to today looks so embarrassed Im v good w not having a birthday in class#the silly is just that Im undercover for it tbh
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thinking.....
#shes....... so weird#<- been trying to put thoughts into words for past 5 minutes HAHA#like im thinking.. maybe she knew more than she let on 7 years ago when zak disappeared#i do think she was trying her best to appease phoenix into taking her into his care#smth smth its hard to believe the renowned gramaryes had money problems#and her line abt not being able to afford school lunches is probably a lie like wht she does with phoenix in the first pic#more thoughts on this later... im so sleepy zzzz#cuz i have... sooo many thoughts abt trucy
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