#30 day count down
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heard it's "make a terrible comic" day
Finally hit 10,000 hours this month after starting making comics full time 2.5 years ago
decided to play paper mario instead of making more comics today (I beat it)
#technically I do think that these hours are counted as long as photoshop is open#so really it's how long I've been at my computer. cause photoshop is always open#but...#well not actually always. I close it when I'm gaming and stuff#and watching movies#but this is. yeah#guys when I tell you I work 60 hour weeks I'm not exaggerating#like sure chatting is involved or getting distracted and maybe like#leaving my computer on for a while or something? but uhhh#GRIMACING EMOJI#makeaterriblecomicday2024#I was gonna make the joke 'i make a terrible comic every day!'#but I dont actually think it's terrible. I love it even#but what is terrible#is these fuckin work hours#GJSDLGJSLKGJSKLG#realistically you can cut it down 20-30% just for how bad I focus a lot of the time?#but for the most part. when I am at my computer#I am at least TRYING to get work done#so... GRIMACE EMOJI
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do you ever feel casually suicidal? like you're not depressed or anything you're doing fine but also it feels like a convenient option
#if you can't make connections with people or be seen by anyone then like. at least you can feel like you're helping a better cause#to like charities and gfms and anyone else#but you have to tone that down bc you're slowly losing money bc you still can't get a job#and bc you don't have a job it means you're just stuck in the house all day. which gives Way Too Much opportunity to Think about everything#and also so like. i still share a room with my sister but it was fine bc she'd stay at her bf's a few nights a week#but he's got a job that's a bit further away and basically she can't go round his as much. so now it's maybe like once a week#the room is getting messier so it gives me less energy to do anything#you can get really into an unhealthy weight loss obsession bc at least it feels like you're getting towards something#but idek is set weight theory real? bc once i get down to a certain point it suddenly resets#like honestly counting calories and donating money to every gfm i saw and writing a film script was what kept me going#but first one isn't working and second i need some sort of income and third is finished and i have no way of actually creating it#and then there's the whole lack of stable hyperfixation and ability to find new music i enjoy#and realistically what would fix me is having a good job that i enjoy and somewhere to live on my own#but until i get a job that's currently impossible. and even then it probably won't feel like enough#my entire life is lived on my phone i need more physical objects but i don't have enough space#bc i share a room with my sister. it's like all my problems are connected#and i have enough optimism that i still think it'll get better in the next few weeks. maybe i'll be able to get a job and that'll#get everything going again#but at the same time i could easily just die#I've graduated from uni. I've seen the who live 3 times. I've crashed my car twice. I've watched 30 years of corrie. I've met various dogs#what else is there to do with my life honestly#(<- joking)#but yeah like. in summer 2021 i almost got suicidal (it was just letting the occasional thought linger in my mind etc)#but that was bc i was so depressed#but now it feels like i could just kill myself. but more just out of convenience#idek. i'm not gonna kill myself. bc i have a job interview on tuesday. and just in general i won't#but there is this casual feeling of like. well i might as well. i can't describe it#ramble#suicide tw#weight loss mention
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3 WEEKS BABEY!!!!!!
#call me the ultimate clairvoyant because im 30% sure this will happen#because just watch time escape me and leave me with nothing to post on my guy’s big day#and in case you were wondering. yes. i am counting down the days#mondo owada#both high school and mondo have made me ill but in two completely different ways
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one thing abt being disabled/chronically ill that some people don’t get is that sometimes body maintenance that ensures you have the absolute minimum amount of function can also be something that takes away a lot of control and autonomy. you can argue till the cows come home that making those decisions to try and help yourself (or realistically to try to make sure things aren’t worse than they already are) is something that exhibits control and autonomy and stuff, but they can be so limiting in practice because they’re things that take up so much time but have to be done to do anything else
#i have to sleep a lot. i’m at the point where functioning requires 8 hours of sleep if not more#I should probably be getting 10+ but i’m a student and i work so 8 is the minimum. but then also getting ready for bed is a whole process s#the whole thing can take 10-12 hours depending how much im sleeping. just to make sure i can do anything#that is time in my day i cannot use for anything else. it’s not ‘oh but i can push through it’ because i can’t without spending the next da#lightheaded and nauseous and vaguely dizzy and with such intense brain fog I can’t think with my fatigue so bad i genuinely don’t know how#get myself to work a lot of days. my abled peers don’t have to deal with this at all. they have unlimited study time if they want to#and yeah it is a choice i’m making that’s true i could just not do. except i would lose my job and fail out of college because i would not#be able to get to classes or do my homework or think. but being told ‘but you are making choices about your life’ when i have lost so much#of what i used to be able to do because i am spiralling down and continuing to get worse is so.#literally last year i would wake up at 6:30 and then go to school till 3 and then go to my internship until 10 and get home at 11 and be in#bed anywhere from midnight to two in the morning and then wake up the next day and do it all again. i graduated with a 3.9 gpa and made it#into my top college while dealing with my cancer symptoms and then the two surgeries about it#but now i lose half my day to just making sure i can get out of bed. i can’t go anywhere because my body is physically too exhausted#any extra time goes into doing homework or occasionally time to myself#not decimating my health by doing minimum body care responsibilities isn’t freeing. occasionally i have a good day which is freeing but tha#usually goes into just. other things outside class or work or eating. I don’t go do something for myself or go do something fun on good day#because I still can’t. good days just mean i don’t want to lie down on the pavement when i’m going somewhere#I just. I don’t magically have control over my life because i try to get enough sleep. i lose half my day to doing that and ultimately it’s#just a bodily function that would have to happen anyway#this is a vent post im just having a really hard time right now because it feels like im in exponential decline. it was nowhere near this#bad last semester. my grades are tanking and i have no free time because anything outside of sleep is either work or school#vent tw#yall can rb this just ignore my tags completely#disability#chronically ill#i keep trying to explain to people how pots works because that’s all logical but there’s no way to explain what it’s doing to my body or ho#i feel all the time. the last time i felt this bad was when i had a bad flu or immediately after surgeries because i don’t react well to#anesthesia and always come out of them feeling like shit. and now i just feel like this all the time and it’s only getting worse#I can’t even stay up late anymore because my body feels like it isn’t counting the sleep even if I get 8 hours#I can deal if I have a free day the day after but that just leaves Friday and Saturday nights and I usually still have to do homework
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Was so proud of myself yesterday because I didn't have a panic attack for the first day in easily a month to immediately have one as soon as I got back to the place today... When will this end?
#personal#Also I must have a very slight fear of heights because I'm up on the 7th floor and the windows in here are wall to wall floor to ceiling.#And the entire time I was trying to calm myself down I was like 'Don't look out the window. Don't look down.' over and over again.#But I wish I was joking about having one for the past month now... Sometimes it's just one. Sometimes it's 2-3. Sometimes it's MORE a day.#I do want to go home to the comfort of my OWN bed to be honest and I leave Tuesday morning.#I think this panic attack was brought on by my homesickness once again... I'll feel better tomorrow when my mom and her boyfriend arrive#here for their hockey game. We won't be hanging out but it's the thought that I know I have family here that counts.#It's so fucking embarrassing admitting I get severely homesick at age 30 LMAO. This is why I can't move away from my family.
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5 weeks until the terrible influence tour!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#dan and phil#terrible influence tour#i've been counting down the days#my gf and my coworkers hear abt it every day#34 days 21 hours 30 minutes#837.5 hours#50250 minutes#phan
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screaming crying throwing up (not in the good way) bc it's been. so damn busy at work this week. begging all the corporate gods to release their hold on my soul so i can write this weekend
#god im so exhausted#lowkey counting down the days till my contract ends#but the inevitability of unemployment is the only thing stopping me#thats a problem for november penn :]#spending over a week in a 30+ degree house bc our AC broke and having random nosebleeds throughout the week#has not!! helped!!#PLEASE I JUST WANT TO DO THE THINGS THAT BRING ME JOY#writing#pennforyourthoughts
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Day 12 and hoping Zack feels Italian on Thursday 🤞 if he doesn’t I’m gonna cry but I wouldn’t blame him
#zack martin#cody martin#november 16 2023#that one scene#the suite life on deck#happy november#the suite life of zack & cody#7:30 boston time??#Zack & Cody#nervous#italian#the dinner reservation#dinner reservation#counting down the days
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me: girl learn from the errors of your ways make your chapters normal readable lengths
me, five minutes later:
#on one hand#the chapter splits are SO satisfying#they end on really good moments and it breaks down perfectly into five week-long passings of time#but on the other hand?#61000 is absolutely barbaric#but i.... i cant split them bro#i could split the last section into 30/30 ish#but like.... no#the symmetry of the weeks#im sorry im going to throw 61 thousand words at you one day#i cant be controlled#hannah rambles#hannah needs to shut up#hannah cant control her word count both in writing and in tags#what else is new!#fic: sos#reader: i split them
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WOLFBANESPARKS
ON TUMBLES????
I've been a huge!!!! fan of your stuff for like YEARS!
now, how did I not know you have Tumblr.
anyway I adore "pretty little thing" and "split" and the plastic man one shot it's awesome
thank you for writing <333333
-guy from ao3
Hi anon!
It's always so exciting to see people from ao3 over here on tumblr! I'm so happy you've been enjoying my stories, it makes all the effort that goes into them worth it 💜
It's funny though because I've been on tumblr waaay longer than I've been writing on ao3 (like since 2012!) I just took my tumblr username and transplanted it to ao3 for convenience lol. Sometimes I forget people don't know they can chat with me over here. My tumblr is a hodgepodge of random things, but I'm always happy to hear from my readers!
#ask me whatever you want y'all#ive been on tumblr so long its almost embarrassing#like i was a teenager back then and now im counting down the days until i hit 30#time flies#but im still having fun so who cares
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today is going to be my 420th day of exercise lol
#stream#swag#blaze it girlies xx#literally ok this is all i do here bc i just … walk so much also i live on the ‘3rd floor’ (in normal ((us)) it’s the 4th floor)#so i’m constantly doing 4 flights of stairs bc THERE AINT AN ELEVATOR IN THIS BITCH 😭😭😭#but it’s fine#stairclimber but … real life#it makes me laugh honesty#also i don’t have a car or bike so im just walking bc there’s no reasonable bus stops near me & the train from my area just goes into town#but like#town is just a 10 min walk 😭😭#& it’s like 8 minutes to even get to the stop walking + then u pay so#walking = free#so whatever i count my steps if i did over 10k steps then i don’t do my 3mi walk (6 down back loops of this parkin lot)#but i do 50 leg lifts 30 squats 6 min planking#but the breakdown is [30x3 LL] [40x1 SQ or 30x1 + 15x1 SQ] [ 3 minx2 PL]#ok that was shooosed to be 30 x 2 leg lifts#& then i call it a day - i’d do scissors but my room is literally#not wide enough for me to do that#like i can barely do the squats 😭😭 PLANKING SORTS BUT ITS A TIGHT FIT#I CAN DO IT EASY#I MEANT LEG LIFTS#planking is whateve the problem is i don’t have a pad & these are the worlds hardest floors w the worlds thinnest itchiest carpet#anyway i got a memory foam bathmat today from primary so it’s my new tiny yoga/planking mat#i’ll probably also use it to put under my spine#i’m soooo fuckin high rn lmfaoooo#shoutout to stardawg i’m sooo FOCUSED
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Not to post spoilers but the TikTok Flight Attendant finally got fired. And I did Not predict what the firable offence was
#for context this guy on tiktok made a video about how he had ~30 days until he was fired bc he did Something#(and it would take about that long for them to find out)#he then proceeded to make fun little videos knitting in the airport n talking about his job counting down to when he would get fired#today was day 27 and he posted a video with the message he received about being put on administrative leave#(and in the process revealing the broad strokes of What He Did)
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i love insomnia AND congestion AND chills AND being on my period
#jesus christ#im not like feverish or anything but i think im just gonna take a sick day like i am Not Equipped For Work rn#ive been awake for far too long (not counting the hour and a half i got between 11:30 and 1am#i can basically only mouth-breath and when i do i taste that unique stale taste of Respiratory Sick#AND i think probably the only reason it's not worse right at this second is bc i took an aleve for mh#cramps at like 9pm last night and im still a couple hours from it wearing off#disGUSTing girl just when i get a booster & let my guard down i gotta Contract Disease and Suffer Wakefulness
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Sneak peak
I working on the drawing for the Good Omens Count down, and I thought I would share a few sketches I have!
when it gets closer to the 30 days before, I’ll share the list of drawings I’ll be doing!
#Good omens#good omens 2#count down#crowley#aziraphale#art#yay#doodles#for those who didn’t see my last post#I’m going to be doing an art work a day good omens themed#On the 30 days before the season 2 release!#Art#my art
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is it near impossible to have hobbies/fun when you have a 40+ hour work week or am I just pathetic?
#my job is the triple threat of me needing to be awake at a heinous time. low wage/shit insurance. and having me being on my feet#or doing something at all times#i have to be awake at 6 every weekday so I can leave at 7 and be to work by 7:15#and then i don't leave until like 3:15-3:30#so I get home anywhere between 3:30-4:30 depending on if I have a work meeting or need to get groceries#and after showering and eating and taking care of things I have like ~4 hours to try to do anything fun before I need to get in bed#but i'm usually too exhausted to do anything productive#because i work with speced children all day and it's so fucking tiring trying to fight them about getting their work done#i need to start bringing my writing laptop to work again#because i was so productive back in october when i was bringing it#because i'd get a couple hundred words written at work#and then be excited to keep writing at home#but man lately i've just been miserable because of work#currently counting down until winter break and praying i'm not knocked out with the flu again#alisha babbles
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I'm tired of having to block and report at least one bot account EVERY SINGLE DAY
#i ignored for a few days and came back with over 30 bots following me#seeing that following count go down made me a bit upset#not that i really care about that type of shit but still#D:
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