#literally ok this is all i do here bc i just … walk so much also i live on the ‘3rd floor’ (in normal ((us)) it’s the 4th floor)

[bibleofficial]

today is going to be my 420th day of exercise lol

[cheesey-rice]

Ok this is on me for my weakness for little old ladies but 😭. Got pulled over by some older Japanese women trying to explain god or whatever to me and when they asked the are you Asian question I was like my mom's from Taiwan and 😭😭. She said "oh, you mean America? Jkjk 😁" 😭😭😭😭 Ma'am. Ma'am you are from Japan and you want to make the joke about Taiwan being the colony of another country and USA's post WW2 economic interference in East Asia? Ma'Am.

[ipushhimback]

my world

pairing: lando norris x reader warnings: none word count: 1.2 k

summary: lando with a woman and 2 kids in the paddock?

Lando has always been a private person. Of course, he occasionally posted a vlog, showed clips of his golfing, streamed, or just showed some racing related stuff.

What no one of the fans knew was, that after every single race there is his family waiting for him. They nearly found out when Lando streamed and their daughter decided that it was the perfect moment to throw a tantrum because she didn’t want to eat her dinner as it was ‘the wrong shape’.

But now that Livy was three and understood what her dad does for a living she really wanted to watch a race so Y/N and Lando had agreed to take her to the Monaco Grand Prix. It was near their home so if anything became to much for the kids, Y/N could just take them home and they would watch the rest of the race from their balcony.

So today you were dressed in a simple baggy jeans, that weren’t so baggy anymore when you compare them to Charles’, and a papaya colored shirt, though no one could see the ‘LN4’ printed on it because of the wraparound baby carrier in which the one month old Aiden was sleeping peacefully.

Livy was wearing a cute white dress with tiny orange flowers printed on it. She was holding Lando’s hand and happily walking through the paddock as if she had done it a million times before.

“I’ll just introduce you to Oscar real quick. Lily isn’t here today so if you want to go to another garage to talk to someone other than the mechanics you can just do that, ok?”, Lando asked as he looked at you with a wide smile that let you know he was happy for you to be here today.

“I know, Lan. You’ve told me that ten times already”, you said leaving forward and pressing a kiss on his lips.

“I know, baby, Just making sure”, your husband said, still smiling.

“Daddy? Why are there no cars?”, Livy said as she looked up at Lando, looking completely confused. Her dad picked her up.

“They are in the garages, baby girl. You will see them later, ok?”

Livia scrunched her nose in disappointment.

“Hm. Wanna see cars now.”

“I know. Oh! There is Oscar! Hey, Osc. How’re you doing?”, Lando asked casually.

You couldn’t help but see how confused the Australian looked.

“Uhm… good? Who… is that?”, Oscar asked while he tried to be polite but he looked absolutely puzzled.

“That is my family. Surprise, I guess. Y/N, my wife. Livy, my daughter. And the little one is Aiden, our baby boy. Sorry I didn’t tell you about them but I really didn’t want the kids to be in the media so much already.”

What Lando didn’t know was that the whole internet was already going wild.

#####

f1gossip Lando Norris seen at the paddock with a woman and kids. Does he have a new girlfriend?

username1 omg. lando is dating a single mom??

username2 pretty sure she is a gold digger…

username3 did she baby trap lando…?

username4 please tell me lando isn’t going to retire now bc he feels like he has to take care of those kids…

username5 pretty sure she only wants his money…

username6 guys do your research. she is Y/N L/N… ceo of some company and literally richer than lando…

#####

Livy in the meanwhile was mesmerized.

“Oscy has pretty hair”, she whispered into her dad’s ear though it was so loud that Oscar heard it and started laughing which made Livia all shy.

“Thank you, little one”, he said while he was still laughing which made Liv hide her face in Lando’s neck who just bounced her a little and laughed.

“She is a little shy. Sorry, mate”, he said to his teammate.

“All good. And this is Aiden? He is super cute”, Oscar said while looking at Aiden who was peacefully sleeping.

“Yes. That’s our little one. He was super mad today when I woke him up to get him dressed though so he is mostly sleeping now”, you said smiling at your little baby boy who sighed in his sleep.

Oscar smiled while looking at the newborn and you started wondering if he will ever also have a kid with Lily.

“Daddy. Wanna see the cars now. Please?”, Livia asked though she was immediately distracted when she saw Charles with his girlfriend Alex walking by. But these two weren’t the ones who got Liv’s attention. It was Leo who was running after the couple on a leash.

“DADDY! THERE IS A DOGGY!”, she explained and squirmed in her dad’s arms to make him put her down.

The second her feet touched the ground she started running over to Leo and plopped down on the ground next to the dachshund who immediately started licking her face.

“Livia Norris! You can’t just run off, did you hear me?”, Lando scolded his daughter. “There are many people and cars which can be dangerous. Mommy and I told you to always stay close to us.”

„Sorry, daddy. I didn’t mean to but dog is cute, look!“, The toddler said while pointing at Leo. „What’s doggy‘s name?“, Liv asked Charles who was standing next to her.

„That’s Leo. He is cute, isn’t he?“, the Monegasque said to Liv while looking at his dog with a proud smile which made Livy nod enthusiastically.

Livia was now looking at Alex who was standing a bit behind Charles.

„You pretty“, she said looking at Alex‘ red dress and then looking back at Leo.

„Thank you sweetie! That’s very nice of you! But so do you. Such a pretty dress. Did you choose it yourself?“, Alex asked while crouching down to be on the same level as Liv.

„No. My mommy said I should wear it because it makes me look like a princess. But daddy said I wear it because the flowers are orange“, she answered shrugging nonchalantly.

Alex just nodded not knowing what to say now. But it didn’t really matter anyway as Liv already spotted Lewis and was immediately obsessed with his braids. She squealed and ran over to the ferrari driver.

„Your hair is so pretty! Did your mommy do that? My mommy always does my hair!“, the little girl said looking up at Lewis while Lando just groaned.

„She already loves half the grid more than me“, he said to you pretending to pout as he wraps an arm around your waist and walked over to Lewis and Livy while he pulled out his phone. „Oh wow the internet is calling you a gold digger now. Interesting“, he said rolling his eyes.

„Let them talk. They will find out who is paying for your golf trips soon enough“, you said chuckling.

But Lando really couldn’t just let them talk. You were his family and important to him.

lando My world (and just for the record she is not a gold digger)

username1 lando has been hiding a whole family for years???

username2 cant believe lando is dating her… he could do so much better

username3 the haters are always gonna hate…

username4 such a cute family they look so happy

username5 not liv loving half the grid more than lando…

a/n: y’all don’t know how long this took me even though it isn’t long or anything…

taglist: @strawberryy-kiwii / @a-distantdreamer / @requiemforthepoets / @martygraciesversion381 / @l-vroom4 / @comicalivy / @sid-is-gr8 / @picklesbuddy93 / @sadiemack9 / @f1fantasys / @cloud-55 / @sunny44 / @widow-cevans / @gigicisneros / @mbioooo0000 / @sinfully-yoursss / @bravo-delta-eccho / @rue-t / @mayax2o07 / @alexanderachillesisgay / @maviesamour / @suhchenjun / @pippyth3hippy / @sweate-r-weathe-r / @joannaln4 / @pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy / @aleatorio1234 

[teddybeartoji]

toji is a cat dad. the cat looks so fucking tiny next to him that it's a little comical actually. they spend every morning together – the cat twirls around and between his legs as he's grabbing the food, quietly meowing and purring. toji smiles softly to himself at the little thing's neediness. so cute.

the cat also just loves to follow toji around the apartment. always. he goes to the bathroom? the cat goes to the bathroom. he's cooking in the kitchen? the cat is in the kitchen. he's asleep in the bed? the cat is in the bed. (big man toji stomping around the house with the smallest cat in the world running after him.......... guys i'm melting i'm dying)

ok but he was a little weirded out by the cat's need to be in the bathroom with him lmao. like he's taking a piss and he looks over his shoulder only to find the little kitten just staring up at him with big eyes😭😭😭 toji grumbles under his breath and tries to ignore him but then he ends up looking over his shoulder again, hoping that he left but no. he's still there. sitting like :3 😭😭😭😭

"yer fuckin' weird..." is what toji tells him as he places the cat on the bathroom counter and he just gets a cute meow back as a reply. the cat watches him brush his teeth and toji has to fight the thing because he's now in the sink????? toji needs to spit out the toothpaste but the critter is getting comfortable in the bowl and he actually feels bad abt pushing him away... wahh he's so soft actually guys i can't do this anymore.

if the cat happens to be a big meower, toji's definitely talking back to him. he literally goes "what're ya yappin' about, lil man? 🤨🤨" while looking at the tiny creature. but he loves it, he thinks it's so funny. he picks the little guy up and just stares at him up close O.O (plss the cat is literally like the size of his palm i'm dying it's so cute).

he also likes to carry the cat on his shoulder. i think every cat would actually love toji so much, this is also canon here you cannot argue with me. and i think they'd all find him very comforting? and i think they'd love to sleep on him. so whenever he's cooking and the cat paws at his legs, he just picks him up and places him on his shoulder.

he once did that when shiu was over and he was just ????????? like man what are you doing put the damn cat down ????????? and toji just went. "no. he wants to see." with a blank face. to him it's very obvious. c'mon, the cat is so little, he has no idea what's happening up here, ofc he wants to see??????? smh shiu do better😒😒😒

oh and this was definitely just a stray cat he took in btw. after a long day at work, he was just walking home with a cig between his lips when he heard the teeeniest tiniest little meow coming from behind the dumpster in an alley. and well... the curiosity got the best of him and he went to check it out aaand lo and behold!!!!!!! itty bitty kitty!!!!

big eyes peering up at him behind a thrash bag, he just knew he couldn't leave the poor thing there. he reached out his hand, letting the kitty smell him and he almost dropped his cig when he actually leaned into his touch immediately!!!! that's his baby now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

he held the cat to his chest as he made his way home and he even stopped by a little corner store to buy him something to eat. the cashier did look at him with a raised brow bc what the fuck this massive man is holding the smallest cat in the world, but toji didn't mind. he didn't care. the cat slept on his back that very same night.

ALSO. thank u @kentophilia for putting this idea in my head ily<33 during the late hours of the day, toji lays in bed while reading his book with his glasses on – the cat stands on his chest with a determined face. he's already purring even though toji hasn't even done anything. he's just soo comforting and the cat just loves him soooo much okay:((((( toji lowers his book to look at the thing before scratching the top of his head and smiling to himself when the cat closes his eyes and purrs even louder.

the cat ends up trying to make biscuits on him and that makes toji yelp lmao. the tiny little claws dig into his warm skin as the he kneads toji like he's a piece of dough. purring and content – toji doesn't have it in him to make him stop either. it's not like it actually hurts, he was just caught off-guard. he didn't get scared by a cat btw, he didn't. in the end, he keeps reading his book with his one hand while petting the creature with the other. this is their routine. they're family!!!!!!!

anyway. he loves his little kitty cat with all his heart and he would literally kill for him:33333

[neoraso]

bf things with riize

shotaro:

is always your biggest cheerleader. listens to all your concerns and comforts you in the best way he can

loves meeting your friends and having you be close with his

is so excited to get to know you and learn everything he can about you - don't mind him he's just collecting data so he can love you even more ;>

is very much in it for the long haul with you- like he wouldn't be with you if he couldn't really see a future with you. he's pretty young and wouldn't really want to settle down until the future but he's planning on being with you as long as he can-often tells you this

wants to be the most positive, safe and uplifting person in your life. expect a lot of big hugs with back rubs, high fives where he intertwines your fingers ♡

eunseok:

he's pretty masculine but also very nonchalant about it. your man. takes care of things for you wordlessly, tucks you in, carries your bags etc.

pretends to be cocky/annoyed by your clinginess but literally becomes a "where's my hug at?" guy when he walks in the door. like if u don't at least give him a kiss hello he's like wth,,, is everything ok with my baby

will pretty much go along with whatever you want.. like if you want to watch a disney movie he'll be like i'm completely indifferent on what we watch but as long as it makes u happy

peels fruit for you and feeds it to you because he likes watching you eat.

so attentive. makes sure you're taking your medicine/vitamins, that you're sleeping well and making it to all your appointments, fulfilling all your responsibilities.

sungchan:

prefers to stay at your house over everything,, u gave him a key and he abuses the privilege- like you come home from work/school and he's just in ur bed .. sometimes even asleep and ur like ok sure??

idk how to explain ,, he's like that typical older guy like brother's best friend vibes just always playful, flirty, teasing but all out of love.

ur just his which he reminds you of daily .. "how's my baby," "my favorite girl doing ok?" "you know you're my angel right?"

loves to attack you with love. pushes you on the bed so he can lay all his weight on you (WILL fall asleep like this if you're not careful), tugs on your hair to get you to look at him , pokes or tickles you if he thinks you're not paying enough attention to him

in that vein, very protective of you. if someone is bothering you or just making life difficult he is ready and willing to throw hands. you can tell bc his jaw clenches and his nose flares just a bit until ur like,,sungchan it's really fine just annoying,,, and he's like mmhm sure (still rubs your arm and back to calm himself down..)

wonbin:

holds your hand as long as he can wherever yall go. like if he's saying goodbye :< waits until the door is about to smash his hand to let go of yours

once you get to the stage where he trusts you to share his worries with ..,,, u are locked in like u are 4lifers

teases his friends a lot but is literally putty in your hands like he will do anything for you and would never want you to question his affection for you

best listener . full eye contact (even if it makes you blush) usually playing with your fingers too. brings up things you've mentioned before and ur like,, how do you even remember this I don't even remember this

lowk needs reassurance and his heart gets so warm when you sincerely tell him how you feel and how much you love and appreciate him

seunghan:

finds anything remotely heart-shaped and points it out to you or texts you a picture.

you are literally his baby.,,, even if you're older, you are his baby. adores you, dotes on you, spoils you, feeds you, etc.

so affirming and validating whenever you rant to him. pets your hair and pouts "really baby? that sounds so frustrating but you're doing so well handling it. i'm here if you need me to fight someone :>" (has never fought anyone in his life)

hypeman hypeman hypeman. encourages you in everything you do and will show his support in forms of kisses, sweet words and texts

unlike sungchan he wont be so ,,... intrusive when he can't see you often but he does video call you as much as he can because he NEEDS to check on his lovely lover sweetie pie angel

sohee:

thinks all your quirks are so endearing and makes him fall even deeper for you

wants to learn your native language so bad so he can be closer to you and meet you halfway in communication

sooooo appreciates how you listen to him and his day, his worries, his dreams. wants to be there for you just as much ♡

i think he'd like to leave you little gifts even if it's like a post it note with a candy and a little encouraging message, or something bigger like shoes or a jacket or jewelry you've been eyeing

though he has so much energy, he also loves recharging at home with you, just snuggling and sharing little kisses and snacks.

anton:

appreciates how you never push him out of his comfort zone, grabs your hand as a silent ask for support.

loves to have fun with you ,, going out with you, watching and making silly tiktoks even just laying around and chilling with you makes him so happiiii

will hug you or backhug you and for some reason gets shy and shocked when you kiss him bc he's so cute

yall definitely started as besties ,, so you're already pretty close as a couple except now you get to kiss and stuff which he thinks is pretty great.

has 282922892 pics of you in his phone, printed , polaroids. he’s too shy to hang them up but he keeps one in his wallet and in his phone case to feel like you’re with him all the time :>

[allisonlol]

OO, how would jouno(you can also add whoever you want but JOUNO HEHZGEZGE i love him sm omg) be w an S/o who is very much stuck in the "crush phase", like giggling, blushing, smiling, hiding their face, and everything

a/n: this is such a cute idea 😵‍💫 !! def how i’d act around jouno too like oh my!!!! i also added tecchou cuz how could i not

warnings: none

(Jouno, Tecchou) With a S/O Stuck in the Crush Phase

Jouno

he def acts all annoyed but secretly loves this shit

jouno can already tell that u still get nervous and excited to see him by the sounds of your heartbeat 😭

but it warms his heart (something we all thought was impossible) that you aren’t ashamed to hide these actions

bro can’t even walk by you without u getting all flustered and hiding ur face…which is valid bc jouno is very pretty !

but he’ll sigh and shake his head, telling u to “stop being dramatic” 😭

^dw he is very much being lighthearted here and doesn’t entirely mean that!! jouno is just…not used to this kind of reaction to his presence so it throws him off a bit

the worst is when u do this shit in public 💀

^y’all will go to the store together and he leans over u to grab something off a high shelf…needless to say u are blushing and giggling like crazy (I WOULD TOO!!)

jouno gets all embarrassed and is like “STOP we are in public 😓”

which only makes it worse cuz he is so cute when he’s irritated

omfg the other hunting dogs def tease him about this 😭 tachihara practically follows jouno around asking how he can get ppl to act that way around him too??

but anyway. jouno abuses this power he has over u and purposefully does things to fluster u

^such as standing close to you, giving u random kisses, putting his arm around ur waist etc

may act like he hates it but the man has such a soft spot for u <3

Tecchou

tecchou genuinely does not fully understand how pretty he is nor the effect it has on u

he’s so tall…and strong…and OBLIVIOUS to how ur practically shaking next to him with how flustered u are

keeps asking if ur ok 💀 “are you sick, y/n? your face is all red”

gee i wonder why tecchou

whenever he bends down to kiss u, u get so nervous that you cover ur face with ur hands

he thinks this means u don’t want him to kiss u tho and is like “i’m sorry 😥”

you’re quick to explain that it’s just cuz u still get nervous around him!! but he can’t really fathom the effect he has on ppl so he’s a bit like ?????

^probably says some shit like “but i’ve literally seen u naked, why are you still nervous around me” 🫠

after awhile tecchou picks up on what is going on and sometimes messes with u to get a reaction

^holds ur face in his hands and just looks at u adoringly before giving u lots of kisses!!! u have to push him away cuz ur blushing so hard

plays it off SO WELL tho like you’d never know he’s doing this shit on purpose

i feel like tecchou was never someone to think much abt his physical appearance or how other ppl perceive him in that way, so ur reactions make him feel something new 🥹

[pupkashi]

volvi a nacer

gojo feels life start anew now that you’re by his side

a/n: hi hi friends ! this is heavily inspired by this song !! i think it’s so sweet and yeah <3 (unrelated but my bf sent me it i was geeking out for a week ok) ALSO GIGI (@4sat0ruu) I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS SO MUCH MY FELLOW LATINA 🙏🙏🙏; slightly latinx coded reader bc i can !

wordcount - 2,737

masterlist

translations: mi amor // my love, hermoso(a) // beautiful, mi corazon // my heart, cariño // sweetheart

there was time in gojo satoru’s life that he felt his life had essentially ended. he felt isolated, like no one would ever fill the void he felt in his chest.

he didn’t think he had anyone to lean on when he needed it, opting for a façade of cockiness and jokes when anyone asked if he was alright.

you saw through it all. with a concerned frown on your face as you wrapped your arms around him, holding him as tightly as you could and squeezing him.

“i don’t need your hugs, y/n,” he scoffed, hoping you didn’t hear the wobble in his voice, “I’m the strongest, i can take on anything by myself.”

“I’m sure you can, but you don’t have to,” you whispered, not letting go for a second. you heard the tremble in his breath, the hitch in his throat when he heard your next words, “I’m right here, you’ll be okay.”

for a split second satoru saw the world for all its warmth and love rather than its faults and challenges. he felt the love and support he’d only ever imagined, the suns warm rays hitting his skin as you held him tightly.

it faded as you pulled away, and he could hear nobara and yuji yelling in the distance, toge and yuta laughing at something.

“I’ll be here if you need me, okay?” you reassure him, your hand lingers on his shoulder for a bit before you walk away.

you’re only two steps away when you feel satoru gently grab your wrist, letting go not even a second after he did. when you turn to face him he looks shocked, as if he didn’t have control of his own body for a second.

“uh- can-” he stumbles over his words, not knowing exactly what to say and not exactly having the courage to say whatever they were.

“yeah, i can,” you smile softly, taking his hand in yours, “how about we get some food, when’s the last time you had actual food and not take out or sweets?” you question.

satoru rolls his eyes, scoffing before counting the days on his fingers, “it hasn’t been that long,” he mumbles, smiling a bit when you shake your head and laugh at him.

it’s been three years since then, somewhere along the way the line of caring friend and something more had been crossed, pinkies interlinking during movie night, a stolen kiss in a maintenance closet when hiding from an upset yaga.

he’s not exactly sure what’s making him reminisce on that day. maybe he’s recalling the way the sunshine felt on his skin, the way it does now as it pours in through the blinds, landing on his bare chest.

“you didn’t snore this time” you mumble, voice a bit hoarse as you wake up.

satoru grins, “I told you I’d stop,” you can’t help but half laugh, cuddling up to him more, “I’d do anything you ask of me sweets.”

“it’s 9 in the morning and you’re already professing your undying love?” you tease, just barely opening your eyes to look at your lover, who’s already staring right back at you, soft smile adorning his beautiful face.

“would do it all hours of the day if you’d let me,” he replies, not missing a beat. you can only chuckle softly, letting your head rest on his chest. your hair tickles him a bit but he ignores it, focusing on the way your index fingers draws random patterns on his abdomen.

satoru lets his mind wander, he thinks how lucky he is.

how lucky he was to be given a second chance at life, to be able to come back from a place so dark, to now be able to quite literally be bathed in sunlight and tender touches.

“where’d you go?” you whisper, adjusting yourself on your side and letting your arm prop you up. satoru is reeled back in, snowy lashes kissing his cheeks gently as he lays on his side to face you.

“thinking ‘bout how lucky i am,” he mumbles, staring at you for a second before a soft smile overtakes his lips, “I love you.” the words never fail to make you smile, you never miss a beat to respond, “i love you more, angel boy.”

“there isn’t anything i wouldn’t do for you, you know that right?” he’s focusing on the fuzz of the blanket rather than your eyes, looking up only when you hum in response.

“what if you have to fight off the most talented swordsman in the world for me?” you tease, he’s smiling at you as he sits up.

“then I’ll get a sword and do what i have to do to not lose you,” he answers like it’s the most simple thing in the world, “I’ve fought off worse haven’t i?” his cockiness makes you roll your eyes and chuckle, sitting up and kissing his cheek before stretching and finally getting out of bed.

“i guess so, you’re too strong for any of my hypotheticals,” you mumble, the taller man following you into the restroom, brushing your teeth together before heading into the living room.

“what do you want for breakfast?” satoru asks, his hands are already reaching for the ingredients for an omelette, recalling how you’d been craving one since last night but fell asleep as soon as you’d gotten home.

“what’s on the menu today, chef gojo?” you smile, moving from the couch to the kitchen bar, watching as he took out four eggs and various veggies and meats.

“how ‘bout that omelette you were dreaming of yesterday, sweetheart?” he’s grinning as he cracked an egg open with one hand over the bowl, a trick you’d taught him that took him the course of two cartons of eggs.

“you’re too perfect mi amor,” the words make his ears turn bright red, face flushed as he continues his fluid movements in the kitchen.

three years ago had someone told you the satoru gojo could make omelettes and crack eggs with one hand you would’ve laughed in their face, betting your life savings and then some against the snowy haired sorcerer.

yet here you are; three years, lots of broken eggs, burnt food and nights in the restroom later- you watch the love of your life make you an omelette.

the two of you eat breakfast over small talk, telling him of your plans for the day.

“I’ve gotta run some errands today, i hope traffic isn’t too bad” you trail off, mentally checking all the things you had to do.

“i can drive if you want,” he shrugs, chugging down the last bit of orange juice in his cup before grabbing your plate and placing them in the sink. “i don’t have anything else going on.”

you smile at your lover, “you don’t have to drive me around everywhere, you know that right?” satoru knew your distaste for being behind the wheel, he only saw it as an opportunity to pamper you and treat you like the royalty you were.

“i know, but i love driving you everywhere,” he grins, walking next to where you were seated and bending over to kiss your temple, “I’ll be your loyal chauffeur for as long as you’ll have me, hermosa.” the word is foreign on his tongue, it slips past his lips naturally, just the way you’d been teaching him common phrases.

“hermosa? who’d you learn that one from?” fighting the smile off your face was a predestined loss, barely hiding how over the moon you were at the new pet name. your words are teasing as you stand from the kitchen bar, stopping right in front of your lover, looking up at him.

“duolingo was hitting on me, actually,” satoru replies, a dimpled smile on his face when your arms snake around his neck, pulling him downwards so his lips met yours.

“can duo fight?” you laugh between kisses, pressing a softer kiss to the tip of his nose before detaching yourself from him.

satoru is ready before you, sitting on the edge of the bed and watching- no admiring, your every move as you get ready. his mind is filled with a whirlwind of compliments he can’t seem to get out, overcome with an overwhelming sense of love for you.

you’re an aura of warmth, kindness and love, and angel sent for him. a caring soul, who nurtured him back to health; through late night calls that ended with you in his apartment or vice versa, gentle reminders and tight hugs helping him through his toughest nights. through forced outings to fairs and arcades, despite his protests that he has been doing things other than working with his students and going on missions (he hadn’t).

it had taken time, but satoru had healed.

your love had healed him.

“oh i can’t do movie night Friday” you frowned, watching as the second and first years trained.

“oh? why’s that” satoru was caught off guard, you’d never been one to cancel on him.

“i- uh- I’ve got a date, actually” you chuckle, staring at your finger nails before looking at the man next to you.

“a date?” he repeated, heart sinking and stomach falling as you nodded with a smile.

“nanami set me up with them, didn’t know he actually had friends besides us,” you smiled, trying your best to ease the palpable tension.

you’d gotten up and left shortly after that, some lame excuse he can’t remember now. he did remember angrily walking into nanami’s office, accusing him of hating satoru and wanting to see him suffer.

“have you thought of- i don’t know, maybe telling y/n how you feel?” kento sighs, trying his best to focus on the report he was filling out before satoru had barged in.

satoru hadn’t thought of that, but he took his friends advice and marched up to you three hours later, confessing his feelings upfront.

“don’t go on that date, they don’t deserve you,” he began, immediately taking you back, “and maybe i don’t either but just give me one chance and i swear you won’t regret it.”

“what’s up with you today? maybe you shouldn’t drive” your words pull him out of his memory, blinking once, then twice before fully coming back to his senses.

“do you remember when you told me you had that date?” he asks, watching as you furrows your brows, the corners of your lips turning upwards as you recall the memory.

“oh yeah! then you confessed like an hour later” satoru nods, blushing a bit. “what about it?” you ask, moving to sit next to him, taking his larger hand in yours, tracing soothing circles into his skin with your thumb.

“i didn’t even know i liked you then,” he admits, “i just felt this terrible feeling in my stomach and yelled at nanami for wanting to ruin my life.” the revelation makes you smile a bit, “he told me to tell you that i liked you and only then did it dawn upon me that i had romantic feelings for you.” satoru laughs at himself now, looking at you with sparkling blue eyes.

“well, you were- and still are a bit of a dummy” you mumble, pulling his arm so satoru can lean against you, letting you rest your head atop his. “my silly angel boy.”

angel boy.

the first time he heard you say that he quite literally stopped in his tracks, smiling from ear to ear before picking you up and spinning you around. ‘say it again!’ he kept asking, blushing just as hard every time the pet name left your mouth.

satoru loves grocery shopping with you, checking off things as you put them in the cart. he thinks you look angelic against the backdrop of produce, heart fluttering as you look for the best bunch of cilantro.

he could do this for the rest of his life, he thinks to himself. the realization makes him bump against the display, thankful nothing fell over.

satoru gojo wants to marry you.

he wants nothing more in his life than to be with you for as long as he could. he wants to spend his mornings and nights besides you, he wants to make you breakfast and help you cook dinner, he wants to wash the dishes because you hate washing them, he wants to wake up to Cumbia and bachata on Sunday mornings as you clean, joining you and singing in broken Spanish as you serenade him with a broom.

it’s not as romantic as he’d once imagined, he thought the realization would come to him as the wind blew through your hair, or the golden rays of the sun kissed your cheeks.

instead he’s watching you pick out a two pack of steak, looking at him with a wide smile, “the prices dropped!” you grin, giddy as you happily put the meat into the cart, practically skipping down the line of raw meats.

he can hear his heartbeat in his ears as he wonder what to do next, mindlessly following you around the grocery store with the cart, every aisle affirming the fact that you’re the only one for him, especially as you tell him to get one sweet treat for the week as you go and get the milk.

he’s staring lovingly at you as you wait in line at the register, watching with interest as your eyes light up, “cariño can you get the eggs? i completely forgot,” he nods immediately, placing a chaste kiss to your cheek before turning on his heel and heading towards the eggs.

satoru lets the thought of marriage ruminate in his mind, recalling the times you’d talked about marriage, agreeing that you’d want to marry him. what if you’d changed your mind since then?

later that week as satoru is passing you the salt, he asks you the question that’s been eating at his mind. “do you still wanna get married?”

you chalk it up to his usual insecurities, turning around and kissing the tip of his nose and both his dimples. “‘course i do, angel boy” you reply, not missing a beat, “why? everything okay?”

satoru nods, eyes fluttering shut when your lips are pressing against his. “everything’s perfect,” he mumbles against you, smiling and chasing your lips for one more kiss before he passes you the butter.

one month later satoru is under the shade the cherry blossom trees give him, with you staring down at him, mouth still agape from seeing him get down on one knee.

“mi corazon, I’ve loved you more than i thought possible, you’ve breathed life into me when i thought there was no reason to keep living, you bring out the best in me everyday,” he begins, hands shaking slightly as you stare back at him, tears welling in your eyes.

“i want to be by your side for the rest of my life, i want to find you in every crowd, save you a seat next to mine and end my days with you in my arms,” satoru tried to ignore the thumping of his heart in his ears, “i want to be the only one lucky enough to be loved by you, will you marry me?”

you’re nodding quickly, mouth still covered before you’re throwing your arms around the snowy haired man- your now fiancé. “of course, yes!” you laugh, sniffling and wiping the tears that had fallen as you squeeze him tightly. “i love you cariño, i love you so so much” you grin, pressing your lips harshly against his, not caring when your teeth bump against his as you both smile, the spring wind causing pink petals to fall around the two of you.

there was a time in gojo’s life when he thought his life was over. he looks back and smiles, how was he supposed to know the best part of his life was only starting?

the void he once felt in his chest was now overflowing with the love and patience you poured into him; sickeningly sweet pet names and tender touches to ease his mind.

satoru can’t help but smile when he wakes up next to you everyday, grateful beyond belief he decided to be vulnerable that day in the courtyard.

“already staring at me lovingly?” you teased, making satoru grin, dimples on his cheeks as he hummed.

“something like that.”

[justslightlymental]

Hi pookalicious!

I was wondering if I can request hazard dating fem!reader who has thick thighs🤑🤑🤑

Also if it’s ok can it be fluff but you can add light nsfw if you’d like 😽🫶🫶

HEHEHEHEHEHEH You know I had to write this IMMEDIATELY (mostly bc its just HCs.... and doesn't take me too long to come up with those.....) Anyway, HERE YOU GO POOKIE!!!! Warning: Includes NSFW HCs so please minors skidaddle, - SFW - Okay first of all I know for a fact this man is down BAD for a curvy/thick/chubby s/o like overall. Man is huge, can lift a fucking car, he has no fucking problem with a heavier size s/o. But obviously he wouldn’t actually care for the size. No matter skinny/chubby ect. He would love his s/o with all his heart and more. Hazard loves to just come home from a hard gig, walk straight into your shared bedroom and find you there doing god knows what and just bury his head into your lap. His arms around your waist as his face gets mushed in the fat of your thighs. You know damn well during any time, any place he would have at least one hand on your thigh, giving it a few squeezes here and there. Like honestly, your legs are technically his own personal stress relievers. Lying face up just staring at you as your hands give his shoulders gentle massages, of course with your legs under him is one of his favorite pastimes. He is also very and I mean VERY overprotective of you. Even more of your body, it's not like he is the one objectifying you or seeing you as a piece of meat, but the other men. In his eyes everyone just wants you for your body and not you. Well it's not like they could have you anyway tbh. If you like to wear skirts or shorts its fucking OVER for him. Especially those short skirts that reveal A LOT of your fatty thighs. Oh and don’t even get me started on thigh high socks or little accessories you can put around those legs, the type that make the fat squeeze out just slightly. God he FUCKING loves it. He doesn’t wanna limit your ability to dress however you please, he knows better than to be THAT controlling. But he can’t help but be basically glued to your side if you decide to dress like that and go out with him. Listen he loves how confident you are, and he also loves the way anyone who may have been staring at you with hungry eyes immediately gazes to somewhere else when he gives them the death glare. If you are the type to go to the gym and especially train your legs he is there to motivate you and cheer for you, your own little gym coach. (Okay he is not little) Actually baffled how much weight you can push with your legs, like holy moly. If he didn’t have prosthetic legs he would definitely lose to you

NSFW - Oh how he loves prepping your thighs with kisses and how he loves to leave bite marks/hickeys all over them. He even encourages you to dress in those tiny skirts of yours so every person can see who you belong to and that you are off limits. Man loves to mark his territory. Whenever you two go at it his hands must be on your legs all the time, he NEEDS to squeeze them and feel the fat around his fingers. He loves to go at it from behind, seeing how the fat of your thighs and ass jiggles at every thrust. The sounds of your skin smacking against each other just turns him on so fucking much. He practically BEGS for you to sit on his face. And I mean he BEGS for it. I'm talking gets on his knees and calls you whatever you want him to call, does whatever you want him to do begs. Literally starts whining, giving your stomach little kisses, giving you those puppy eyes of his. “Bonny… Please. Im beggin’ ya. J’s lemme taste ya’” And when he finally gets you to agree, usually with no need for even the begging part he is already on his back, bringing you up over him. You might be a little hesitant to fully sit on him, fearing you might crush him but this man… let me tell you… His hands on your waist as he literally pulls you on top of his face, immediately getting to work. When he said to sit on his face HE MEANT IT, if you try to get off he will just pull you against his mouth harder. When you get closer to your peak, your thighs crushing against the sides of his face he is in HEAVEN. He does not give a shit if he suffocates, at least he went out in the most heavenly place of all, getting crushed by his favorite things in the world. - (DM to get added :D) TAGLIST: @leviathanleva

[lady-forest-1142]

hiii I'm reposting my review of cordelia's honor here from my goodreads bc I need more ppl to share in my obsession dammit! (also if I've misspelled any names have pity on me, I read this on audio)

an instant favorite? an instant favorite that I read on audiobook?? in this economy??? unequivocally, yes. holy fuck. this had everything. large cast of compelling characters, fast-paced plot, romance, explorations of war and violence and power and motherhood and disability and morality, tight writing, dry humor - the works. I wish Barrayar had been six hours longer. I need to start the next book immediately. I don't know that I can do it justice in a review.

Shards of Honor: okay, after all that gushing this was only ("only") a 4.5. we've got a survival story, a galactic war, a psychological thriller, and a romance all combined, and the plot shifted tones and focuses just a little too much for me (plus I'll admit the space battle parts lost me a bit). we're following cordelia naismith, a research officer on assignment on a (unbeknownst to her) politically-advantageous planet. cordelia's base is ambushed by a mutineering band of barrayaran soldiers, the enemies of her people of beta colony, and she finds herself stranded on the planet with the notorious barrayaran admiral aral vorkosigan. the plot escalates in leaps and bounds from there - to outline anything more would be a spoiler. needless to say, cordelia and aral fall in love, against a backdrop of the aforementioned mutiny, a war, a scheming emperor on his deathbed, and a masochistic officer. cordelia is a soldier, a captain, a captive, a prisoner of war, a psychic patient, and a lady in the course of 336 pages. and I love her. she's an absolute badass, she's deeply compassionate, she isn't afraid to call anyone (particularly aral) on their shit, she's reckless. she waterboards someone in a fish tank. she utters possible the most metal romantic line I've ever heard ("when he's cut, I bleed"). I want to be her when I grow up. aral falls sickeningly in love with her - he literally admits that he first got a crush on her upon seeing her throwing up in a creek and proposes marriage to her after less than two weeks. he's also a (CANONICAL) disaster bisexual whose idea of therapy is getting drunk in hideous hawaiian shirts with sentimental value and he has a sadistic murdering ex-boyfriend. actually this is a great book to read as a bisexual. I want to be their third so bad.

Barrayar: yeah this is the book that sealed the brainrot for me. political intrigue, a fancy-dress ball, assassination attempts, high emotional stakes, cordelia being the only rational person in the room 80% of the time, the BEST side characters, all escalating to a civil war that, naturally, involves cordelia beheading people? sign me the fuck up. I'm not gonna talk about cordelia and aral again save that I love them even when aral is being a moron with a horrible father. he doesn't rly deserve cordelia and he knows it. ok. now. koudelka is my babygirl and can literally do no wrong, okay? even though he is a moron of the absolute highest order who needs to be slapped approximately every 50 pages (cordelia usually takes care of it). (actually all the men in this book are morons and the women are perfect. no wonder I like it!) hottest man to carry a walking stick / sword since jem carstairs. droushnakovi my QUEEN, idolizes cordelia (as she should) bc barrayaran society is stupid and misogynist and she's never seen a female soldier before, deserves every good thing in the world (first and foremost a briefing on feminism). bothari....I am clenching my fist in emotion. when we are talking of COMPLEX MORALLY GRAY MEN....look no further. when he calls himself cordelia's pet dog???? gnawing at the bars of my enclosure. he is FAR from perfect and I'd probably want to be at least 500 meters away from him irl but GOD does he get in my FEELINGS. plus also girl dad, so we have to cheer. ohhh my god and I haven't even gotten into the politics and social structure of barrayar and how it is so similar to our own and how cordelia is in the perfect position to critique it bc beta colony is suuuper different and way more advanced, and critique it she does. the conversations about motherhood and the expectation that mothers carry their children to term biologically even when technology exists elsewhere in the galaxy to literally replace and replicate a uterus? actually every single discussion about motherhood and social expectations on barrayar vs beta colony. frighteningly prescient for a book published in 1991!! ALSO the conversations on disability and the validity of disabled life that I am sure will only continue?? (count piotr can go kick rocks btw). can you tell this is my favorite book of the year yet?? jesus christ. I need the next one immediately.

[haveihitanerve]

I figured that I would actually provide the source material to the stuff im commenting on, so uh yeah, here ya go, more SFTH nonsense with my thoughts bc you guys actually seem to care and enjoy them strangely enough???

anyway yeah, you know the drill, dont care about my dumb little lizard brain squeals of joy, dont click the keep reading button bc its a lot lol :)

those of you who do(thanks) and continue!!!-

“One of you… is hosting a party…” Luke looking between them like ‘who tf is gonna move’ while AJ is literally already half out of his chair because he knows they’re gonna make him do it-(literally a quote from Tom[not verbatim but close] “we always make AJ guess, because he… has the most trouble with it, and thats a joy”)anyway-

Sam’s eyebrow raise at Tom across the stage

“Balding” whoever said that- i love you. Sam, of course, volunteers, he’ll never pass up an opportunity to rag on one of his besties and we love him for it

His grin, once again across stage, to Tom

“Vampire bugs bunny.” toms face- and Luke immediately pointing it out

“He can do Bugs Bunny, I cannot.” “you can do bugs bunny cant you” help the fact that they just know  all this ahhhhh <333333

“Oh shit, Which means I’m balding…” don't lie tom you cant wait to annoy AJ with this

“What do you want Luke to be?” Tom you evil evil genius

“This is for giving him balding-” don't act like its karma Tom this is all you ever wanted

“Someone who’s convinced he’s tall.” whoever said that, marry me- you're hilarious and clearly have good taste if you're at this show

Luke also laughing at the joke is a joy

Tom pacing as Luke takes control again, literally grinning giddily with excitement ugh they clearly love what they do so much and its so pure

Toms smile at “yay!” idk its just pretty

Aj idk what kind of accent this is but im loving it

But tf were those hand movements- are we wrapping presents? 

Ok even he broke at it, and sam was grinning- luke laughed, very nice

So im not a big bugs bunny person but even i can kinda catch on to what sams trying to do- very clever, im soooo many levels of curious to know if aj can guess it

“Carrot” !!!!!!he said CARROT!!!! YAY close

Tom crossing the stage to enter from the same door as Sam-honestly i cant with their stagecraft anymore help-

Also the doorbell is soooo much higher for tom than it was for sam- sams was at his chest, toms was above his head anyway

“Careful.” AJs glance up into the cosmos to figure out what tf that means and how its a hint

Toms doing great job of being insecure about his hair, loving it, and the audience is eating this up

“This guy sucks and i should know about that” AJ’s frozen face of fear because what is he trying to tell me, quick what does that mean- oh shit im screwed-

“Other front door.” yep! Theres the stagecraft comment- Tom dodged it quite obviously but Luke had to go for the joke

PFFFFFF oh wow Luke is doing a brilliant job of being tall, truly

“I was just looking in the mirror and I couldn't see him behind me.” oh i completely forgot about the vampire bit- thank you tom-

Also sam helping him out with the “ting!’ is great, we love to see them helping each other (for once lol)

“All of the characters of the looney tunes” oh aj so close

“Uh, the bunny one.” “oh please no!” XD NOOOO AJ!!! COME ON!!! I BELIEVE IN YOU!!!!!

Luke breaking as well for it is the best 

Aj having to turn to look at him like “why did you let him choose this character- idk who this is.” 

“..lots of creatures” Luke literally folds, as Sam does the classic disappointed covering his face with one hand and tom has to walk away, classic

The way they join behind AJ like moral support kills me-

“Oh no you're really annoying me you're really---*expectant waiting* [bugging me]” nope aj is lost “fuckin-” now sam has to walk away LMAOOO

TOM LITERALLY ALMOST WALKING OFF STAGE IS INSANE

“Its like surveillance” aj- please, im begging you- we’re all begging you- go. simple. 

“Its called they piss you off.” Luke walking to the front of the stage so that everyone can see his disappointed head hang is crazy

“BUGS!!!” LADIES AND GENTLEMEN HES DONE IT AGAIN!!!! 

Oh no… oh no, aj please- please get it- please

“Bugs bunny.” YEAH!!!! YES YAY WOOHOO!!! HES DONE IT!!!!

Tom finally getting his moment to bring up his excellent addition- “its so crazy, i couldn't see him behind me in the mirror.” also walking to the front of the stage, thats gonna be a pattern

SAM LITERALLY KISSING AJ ON HIS BALD HEAD OMG IM GONNA CRY OF CUTENESS WHATTTTTT

MY HEART

“Hey my bald friend over here,” yess!!! Two in one!!! Nice work!!!

“Thats  your quirk.” man has never been so insulted in his l i f e 

Tom shrugging in answer as AJ smiles in disbelief is amazing

“I've got a pretty good angle.” while looking at the floor is what gives me life luke never change

“Is it like me ten years ago?” luke and tom both breaking at that- also, side note, they've known each other ten years to bring it up casually and have witnessed aj balding- moving on

Tom literally having to hug AJ after he guesses right XD i adore these little fucks so much

“You are so buff right now man.” Aj confused as to if this is real or…??? “Ok-?” laughs. oh these ridiculous goobers

“Fat friend.” wrong- wrong direction dude- up, not sideways🤭 so close

“All through this” still looking down, gestures to the space above his head that does not have body as much as he would like it to be

Luke having a breakdown on stage about an issue that he genuinely gets ragged on so much for- im losing my mind omfg-

“Tiny giant.” luke losing it again- and i gotta say thats a pretty nice way to describe it, i think he gets the point

Tom leaned forward in anticipation, the cutest smile on his face, sam leaned back, trepidatious 

“Im really- Im not *moves to the front of the stage and yells at the audience* tiny okay???” lukes loosing it niow

“Its very funny isn't it?” oh no, hes pacing and breaking the fourth wall- oh no

“Cause hes tall-” Tom perking up, “oh look! Im being included back in the sketch!” “and hes a normal height!” AJ isn't even bothering to think anymore, just enjoying the show

“Hes only 5’10” yes!!! Call him out Luke!!!

“And yet somehow Im a fucking short guy!!!” i just love the other three dudes expression in this scene, just pure delight at Luke finally snapping(albeit jokingly) and being like ‘yeah… tough luck’

Also, love Luke casually including the people no longer in the sketch back into it just to make a point and call out his legitimate grievances, love it

“Im not short!” oh now hes back in it ok-

“I don't know if im talking to a character or luke right now-” Tom and Sam breaking before he even finishes the sentence lol

“I don't know either.” oh poor baby XD

“Luke,” genuinely starts to address him by his actual name, gods i love them- he was about to legitimately comfort him before sam came in- i know it(or insult him further but like wtv, same thing lol)

“Connnn-vict!” Luke trying to speak and then giving up- AJ!!! Vince! Not Vikt!!!

YAYYY!!!! HE DID IT!!!!!! 🥳🥳🥳

Anyway, hope you enjoyed this segment of me losing my mind about SFTH and their incredible bromance and also humor, thanks for tuning in, see you next time(maybe, if you guys still want it lol)!

@dawn-speckled you wanted it last time, hope you want it still??? anyway, thanks for reading, it means a lot, and byebye 👋

[majoryeager104]

I NEED MORE TOUYA HEADCANNONS PLEASEEEEEEEEW

AHHH OK IM ON IT RN HERE U GO <3

Summary: Touya random hcs w and w/o s/o

Warnings: Language, Touya being too precious for this realm

He definitely has a teddy bear from childhood that he stole from the house after he woke up from his coma

It has a few little burn marks on it, but he thinks that gives it character

Can’t fall asleep without it 

Unless he has you, but still

That teddy bear is always within arms reach when he’s trying to sleep

One time Toga found it when she snuck into his room for a jacket cos she was cold

She’s been sworn to secrecy (he threatened to burn up her cardigan collection)

The first time you slept in his room, you asked about it

At first he was defensive

Like “yeah it’s mine tf u gonna do about it”

But then one day he walked in to see you asleep on his bed

Cuddling his teddy bear

He coulda died then and there

Definitely one of the very few pictures he has on his phone

Because he’s barely on that thing

It’s probably not the first one he’s had

I bet he accidentally burns them up on missions

So he just never takes it with him anywhere

Which always scares the shit out of you

Bc what’s the point of having it otherwise

You didn’t get it till he showed you all the pictures he had of you on there, and you realized he just didn’t want to lose them

Bc it’s a burner phone, so he doesn’t use it for much else

He has another phone for work, but that’s the one he keeps for pictures of you

And all the videos and memes you send him

He looks at them like a week after you send them

Yes he’s one of those 🧍

But he does look at every single one 

You make him playlists too, and he DEFINITELY listens to those

Bc he’s music addicted (might be a bit of projection hehe)

But yeah

It’s just a whole phone he keeps just for you

He wants those videos, memes, playlists, and cute photos of you bc he’s scared that one day he won’t have you anymore

But he’d never say any of that out loud

Even though he knows you’d understand 

Bc he’s scared 

Moving on before I cry 

He’d like Taylor Swift 

Hear me out guys

The emotional lyrics? The topic of betrayal? The style? The vibe? He’d love it. (Secretly ofc)

He’s literally “who’s afraid of little old me”

Like I can see him singing “The smallest man who ever lived” while crying in the car

“WERE YOU SENT BY SOMEONE 😭😭😭WHO WANTED ME DEAAD”

He’d secretly adore her country eras too

And you may or may not have dragged him to the Eras tour

And he may or may not have secretly been looking forward to it

He wore all black (he’s literally reputation) and ended up with a shit ton of friendship bracelets by the end of the night

He still has them

Tucked away in a drawer 

never to be seen by anyone else

But you ofc because the two of you trade

Moving on tho hehe

He’d be either a heavy af sleeper, or a light af sleeper

No in between

Like hes either not moving or he’s not sleeping. 

Maybe both

He probably watches you sleep when he can’t though

And if you have a nightmare he’d wake you up and get you water

And if he had a nightmare, he’d either wake up in a panic and just lay on top of you

Or you’d wake him up, and he’d still lay on top of you

You’re his personal pillow now

But he’s your heating pad 

So it’s fair. 

(He’s also this song tbh lmaooo and all the songs I mentioned are from TTPD but that’s because the album is so Touya coded ughhh 😭😭😭)

[n3ptoonz]

Hello! I saw your most recent headcanon list thing with the Earthrealm guys being caught Slonking it Silly Style™ and uh. I was just wondering if you'd be willing to do something similar with the Outworld guys as well? Obviously you don't have to if you don't want to, but I think it would be neat! Thank you so much in advance! I love your work :)

deep, dramatic sigh. (kidding anon tysm i gush over comments like this ily smoochhhh) also the terminology made me laugh out loud ty for that

Shang Tsung

kinda sorta didn't gaf. who's to say he didn't want you to hear him. the world may never know

you were to report to him about some findings for his experiments and there he was, leaning over the table and straight up cranking it over a bucket (he's odd like that) honestly when you acknowledge your own presence he's like... can i help you?? you see i'm busy???

but at the same time he's like hold up i have a fine specimen here to help me out here...he's leaving here with SOMETHING (studio laughter)

Rain

i don't think he'd care either if you walked in on him. in fact, he might welcome it. he's used to having his own space, but he doesn't mind sharing it with people he's ok with being around. yes that includes you (is it only you? not even he knows yet)

day 8163 of using Rain's arrogance to push my narrative that he's not only in love with himself but how he looks in the mirror. you definitely walked in on him wanking it in the mirror and he'd freeze but recover so quick

ain't no way you're leaving here after you just caught him though. how else will his problems get solved? you went and made him hard all over again!

Reptile

syzoth has two, let's get that out the way. AND he uses both hands for them LMAOO

president of syzoth is a lil subby bitch society. so when you catch him tugging on both and reduced to a pathetic mess from his own hands??? he's frozen and quite literally has no clue what to do. he's sweaty, there's tears in his eyes, and his fangs are much more pronounced than usual

once you give him the green light that you're into whatever tf he was just doing watch him crawl over to you on all fours and hug your legs, practically begging you to touch him

Havik

expect this smug fuck to claim he wanted this to happen. dude was hunched over and going at it behind his own desk, grunting like a cave man who discovered self pleasure for the first time

1000% expect him to demand you help him, but instead it's after he froze for like 5 seconds and then tried to play it off

he would also be internally shocked when agree to finish the job, but on the outside it's like "that's what i thought...now get over here" whole time he's jumping up and down and twirling in his brain

Reiko

it's already rare that he has time to himself and definitely RARELY has time to be with you for an extended period of time, so you catching him when you wanted to surprise him with your presence it triggered his fight or fight LMAO

legit laughed at the thought of him jumping up from his chair hands ready to be thrown...but his dick is swinging PLSSSSSS

he's like well shit now he deserves your help after you almost got two pieced by your own boyfriend...but who's complaining?!

General Shao

this man weirdly reminds me of bowser sometimes. with that being said i think he'd do a BUAHA as a shocked sound when you catch him thwoping the schlong

as much as i can't fucking stand him he does look a lil better in this game i will admit. i'm not gonna sit up here and lie, he def has a HUGE wanker innit. so you didn't miss shit when you walked into his chambers

he would also demand your help. but if you have a lil push back just for fun, he'd eventually say please and be all soft and shit. why? cause it's you god damn it!

Baraka

let's be fr. truly i do not think mk1 baraka would masterbate simply bc he's like depressed all the time😭but for the sake of shits and gigs, ill humor y'all

let's say he hasn't seen you in a while and misses you dearly. he knew you were on a quest for a while, and he was very pent up... so what better way to release stress other than sparring! oh. not enough? time for another type spar 😈

if this were old baraka i'd say he has two 👁️ but since this version of tarkat is a disease let's say it made the skin around his wee like ribbed or something ya SO when you caught him he was in a straight up panic and apologizing profusely but once you calm him down and tell him you're glad he missed you so much, he's like oh shit...well help me out then...only if you want to!

a/n: i did it y'all FUCK. my bad for taking so long to release this i'm a perfectionist to a fault💀

[oh-no-its-bird]

*wiggles seductively* hi birb, what are ur thoughts on the tailed beasts + jinchuriki

Woah Oni how did u get in my asks box

UMMM TAILED BEASTS AND THEIR JINCHIRUKI OK LETS SEE

I've had (and posted about) a few scattered thoughts ab both the tailed beast and their jinchuriki before, so let's see what I remember off the top of my head

I think Utakata is contender for my favorite Jinchiruki— we don't see much of him but what we do intrigues me. I'm a sucker for a man in slutty, slutty robes and his bubble ability is both interesting and cute to me. I wish there was more content for him

Other than him tho, Gaara is ofc, fucking amazing as a character. I think his entire situation is a great example of the lengths people will go for power, and how willing some parents are to destroy their own children in the hopes of power.

Its a theme that fits in very interestingly specifically in the earlier chapters of naruto, when we are seeing the shinobi world from the shiny eyes of children, who think the whole thing is "cool" and treat the many tiny tragedies and traumas of the adults around them as much more lighthearted than they could be read as. Idk, it's fun to think about

I know we all joke about how "oh its stupid of people to have mistreated the jinchuriki, they're literally walking nukes just be nice to them omg ur signing ur own death warrant rn" but it's easy to see in text why people are so scared of them— especially civilians

They're walking nukes! They have demons in them! The propoganda machine works overtime to make people fear jinchuriki, both on purpose (other villages fear mongering) and just due to natural cultural beliefs (literal demons in rural Japan. The fear writes itself.)

I do think there's an interesting middleground there of like. A jinchuriki being treated with kindness literally only out of fear. Which is still better than blatant abuse, but also still fun to think of the ramifications of being raised like that

I think it's also interesting to see the difference of how many jinchuriki were treated in their villages— some for sure got it worse than others, even if there was a solid through line between all of them of different degrees of "people are scared of me and no one fucking likes me"

I do wish we'd gotten more of the jinchuriki's all together, I love fics where they get to come interact together as some sort of messy family.

Similarly, I love the biiju as just. The world's most dysfunctional family. They are so fun as characters, most of them just want to be left the fuck alone but have no issues with flattening humans if they come too close and I love this for them

I think the relationship between biiju and their jinchuriki are so fun, they are both victims here, they are both justified in hating eachother. But if they are able to overcome that hate and get along— its just really interesting to see. That takes some real strength, on both their parts.

A human trusting a demon, a demon trusting a human. Its desperation that got them there. Desperation and exhaustion and a wish to be free.

The tragedy really writes itself

I've read several fics that take an angle of "since the biiju were sealed, the natural balances of the world have been thrown out of wack" where they'll have things like nature getting more violent or common yokai having dissapeared in the years following the biiju's sealing

I think that's super, super fun and I personally like to use the hc of "yeah no, yokai were super common like ~60 years ago but then Hashirama sealed the Biiju and they all just kinda of dissapeared in the following years. Almost like they sensed the absence of the big spirits and went into hiding in response"

Super fun! Instantly adds several fascinating implications about the naruto world and how it works and how the biiju interact with it by just existing

I also love, love, LOVE to think about the initial reactions to the biiju being sealed back in early konoha. Bc like. Ok so you have this culture, this Japanese culture, that largely revolves around the spirits and respecting them in the hopes that they will leave you be. Generations of people raised with the rules of "leave yokai the fuck alone"

And then you go and have your leader seal one of THE biggest yokai inside of his wife.

The bad karma is off the fucking charts. I refuse to believe everyone just nodded and went "wow what a great idea! Nothing bad could possibly come from this!"

No, no, there were for sure different camps of people who were different levels of horrified / disgusted / terrified / etc.

I think maybe the younger, less superstitious, more ambitious and power trippy people might have been some flavor of pleased, while the older more superstitious people just. "Oh god what have you DONE what have you LET INTO OUR HOMES!!??!"

I imagine that in the following year, Hashirama had to work overtime in appeasing people for fear as whispers of "this village was a bad idea, look now we've gone and angered the kyuubi. He will break free and kill us all and we'll deserve it for being such fools as to try and keep him sealed" grew louder

I remember someone told me that in the manga, we got a couple panels of where it looked like the uchiha had made a shrine to the fox after Kurama was sealed? Which just. Fascinates me. Because it shows that there was some sort of effort made to presumably appease him, which, again, oh man the implications

And then ofc Hashirama goes and gives all the other villages the keys to getting their own Biiju. And people start to fucking hunt them.

And then all the yokai are dissapearing and the bad omens are only getting worse and—

Well, you get the picture.

Anyways, yeah. Early Konoha and general shinobi world reactions to the biiju being sealed fascinate and delight me in equal measure. There's so much room there for practically anything ur gay little heart desires

Oh on that topic, I think it's also interesting to think ab like. Maybe at first, the jinchuriki were genuinley revered. Again, like, culturally, most people are gonna see (especially big) spirits and start trying to appease it so it leaves them the fuck alone, right?

So just. Thinking ab how at first, the jinchuriki were treated with largely (terrified) respect. Especially when they were no doubt first put into already respected and powerful people.

And then, yk, time passes.

People get more used to the idea of jinchuriki as more "honored demon containers" and more "demons themselves."

Jinchuriki are placed into children. Jinchuriki are used in the war effort. They're given names. Faces to fear. People who have killed loved ones— put into bingo books besides other shinobi, just another man to fear.

Theyre... human.

(Theyre hated.)

Nost yokai aren't around anymore, and while many still give their respects at shrines and crossroads, its not with the same urgency and genuine belief as before. Many of the new generation pay no respects at all, and the lack of consequence from the still gone yokai does nothing to convince them to start

It becomes easier and easier to let the "terror" to win over "reverence."

Anyways just. The changing of attitude towards jinchuriki as they become more normalized as just another person over the years. Also something that's fun to think about

Anyways that's what I got, thanks for stopping by my ask box Oni, love u

[aespecte]

every1… have we SEEN the new love&deepspace ✨nightly rendezvous ✨ cards?? cause GAHDAMN what is this scandalous behaviour 😧? IM HERE FOR IT 😻😻

the most unserious 18+ word vomit below about the l&ds men bc i am completely sane 🙏 if u think it doesn’t make sense it’s bc it doesn’t LMAO just my two cents about the new card trailer 💗

minors dni below the cut. pookie, just don’t.

xavier not taking it out on the plants? oh ! so you’re gonna take it out on me 😻😻 i love angry men *twirls hair* “i won’t be easily satisfied tonight” OKAYY XAVIER HOW MANY ROUNDS ARE WE GOING??? 😼😼

rafayels forceful kissing?? i have NAWT see this man so aggressive before and erm… maybe i love it… a bit too much… scratches head… ANYWAYS did u see how he hooked mcs leg on his waist?? lowkey i feel like he’s turning into a hard dom… 😻

sylus being sylus.. im sure we are IN for a ride 😻😻 quite literally, a ride. 🙏 like OKAY KING ! call me and i’ll be right there 😼 OKAY ALSO sylus interlocking our fingers?? contrary to popular belief, he is a soft dom me thinks ! sure, he’ll do a bit of teasing, but i think he would put us first in bed 😻😻

zayne stepping out of line? i love seeing polite, respectful men turn into the kinkiest of shits in bed 🥺 and the shot of zayne literally SHOVING his books off the desk to make room for us? my fantasies are gonna have a field day tonight 😻😻

i am CONVINCED that after this mc won’t be able to walk for the next week… okay maybe more like the next MONTH

i must get all the cards 👹👹

ok lol thanks for reading love ya 😻😻

[yourheart-inmyhands]

Ok a weird request 😭

Imagine yan!Zhongli, abyss!Aether and Neuvillette with a darling that loves them back (they don't care they're a yandere (and no it's not Stockholm Syndrome)) but just asks their brother to be with them (bc they imprisoned her) and if they accept, they see that the supposed "brother" is a dog- like- darling considers her dog her own brother.

The reason is that I myself consider the dog my mom has my brother- Please I am normal I swear 😭

- Weird anon ✨ (idk if you do this honestly 😭)

so i actaully don't write for aether anymore (i'm so sorry about that ;v;), but i hope you still like the other two! and don't worry about being weird lol, my cat is my literal son, like i'm 99% sure i gave birth to him and just forgot (it's scary how alike we are) XD

Warning: this post contains yandere-themes, including obsessive behavior, implied being held against will, that's about it this one is pretty tame, and other potential topics. Please read at your own risk!

Yandere!Zhongli allows it, but that doesn’t mean he entirely understands it. Please don’t expect him to grasp the entire thing right away. He’ll ask if your ‘brother’ sits at the table for dinner and if Zhongli needs to prepare additional servings for him, etc. Despite having lived for many, many years and having seen many strange things, Zhongli still struggles to fully understand the situation. He allows it though, anything to make his beloved happy.

“Does he… does your brother sit at the table with us for dinner?” Zhongli looked at the dog sat by your feet, one eyebrow raised in confusion as he anxiously awaited your response. A dog at the dinner table wasn’t exactly good for sanitary eating but he supposed he could allow it to slide for your sake. You had been compliant with his wishes thus far, who would he be to deny you the one thing you had asked for. He at first thought that your ‘brother’ had once been human and turned animal, but when you explained the situation to him, he seemed to feel even more at odds. Regardless, you are his beloved, and he’d comply to your wishes so long as it was in reason. Not only did he want your love, but he wanted you to be happy, and if this silly wish of yours was what it meant, he’d gladly give in.

Yandere!Neuvillette is perturbed to say the least. He had known already that your family had a dog, but he didn’t think you’d be this attached to it. Nevertheless he does retrieve your ‘brother’ and makes accommodations inside the manor for him. He doesn’t much interact with him though, Neuvillette isn’t really a dog-person, he’s not really an animal person at all. This was your one ask thus far though and you’d been accepting of his love so he wouldn’t argue. The dog will not be allowed to eat dinner with you though, he will eat his food in a separate room, as proper etiquette calls for.

Neuvillette didn’t understand the attachment that humans developed with animals, but he also never really cared for animals. The melusines were different, they behaved much like humans and could converse with Neuvillette, animals could not. When you requested that you be allowed your brother, Neuvillette was skeptical at first. When you then explained that your ‘brother’ was a dog, he relented, retrieving the pet for you. While he makes a room for the dog and even prepares meals for him, do not expect him to love the dog. Neuvillette doesn’t much care for bonds with animals like that, he’ll greatly outlive them and simply isn’t fond of the type of companionship they provide, so your brother is all yours. Of course if you asked, he’d walk him or bathe him or do any other such task, but only if asked will he do it. His rule is that you asked for him to brought here and that he is now your responsibility.

[penelopesbaby]

Okkk so I’m bored sooo I’m gonna rate the zsakuva characters on who I like MOST TO LEAST (and I might do hc later)

I’m organizing these in a list so itll go from "my MAN" -> "okayyy cutie divaa i see you" -> "youre...ok" -> "...could you not" -> "get the fuck away from me" 😁

Starting off strong the "my MAN" category:

1. ANDREW - he was the first one I listened to and I LOVED HIM and I STILL love him and hes just so like like lover boy idk how to describe it I just 💗💕💝💕💓🩷💕💖💗💘💖💕💝💓💘💕

2. ASIREL - Listennn... for a WHILE xanthus was #2 but like asirel walked in and I honestly forgot how to act I CANT lie also pet just being pet makes listing to him SOOOO much more fun

3. XANTHUS - yall KNOW. Me and xanthus... heh... we go way back... 😼 (I’m sorry I’ll stop) xanthus has been my man since he pulled up to the scene ok? When he comes back (if ever) I WILL swerve on that corner wooooah. (😨🔫👈)

4. ELIAS - OH BITCH WHEN I TELL YOU. When I tell you experimenting with his character via different AUs and headcanons is always so fun for writing plus hes SO CUTIE BRO I CANT I JUST I need him like injected into my veins fr...

5. DONTIS - oh my God bro I remember one time when he only had like 2 episodes I listened to them on repeat for 4 hours while playing tunnel rush also his friendship dynamic w xanthus is smthn I LIVE for, they are like THE duo. Also in like the 3rd ep where he gave listener all of his properties n stuff incase he didn’t come back? Goated character.

7. ZAROS - oh GIRL I’m so hyped I cant even lieee like. He wants that cookie so EFFING BAD I CANT

Now the "okkayy cutiee divaa I see you"

8. ROWAN - hes so cute I literally cannot we need more episodes pulleaasseeee

9. JONAH - honestly jonah used to be higher up and hes still a great character dgmw I js don’t love him like I used to but thats ok :3

10. ISAAC - OH GIRL don’t get me started he would be so much higher if he wasnt a slow burn, and I get why he was a slow burn but I hategaheyshag slow burns (I say after reading powerless) but oh the man he IS BRO. He brought a gun to a NIGHTMARE AND HE GOT THERE FAST don’t PLAY W MY BOY ISAAC

11. KAYSON - hes only here bc I didn’t know where to put him. I used to LOVE him but I started not liking him idk why

12. ALEX - shut up. Don’t care. "He should he lower-" hes EXACTLY where he needs to be ok? My mans is ACTUALLY TRYING OK.. hes taking time to do therapy and change let him grow guys 🫶

"Youre..okay"

13. MATIAS - I mean hes... ok? He only has like two audios and I’m NOT afraid of thunder

14. LUCA - I don’t... like.. I just cant like no..

"Get the fuck away from me"

15. CEVYK - I’m like sorta religious and I don’t SHAME PEOPLE FOR WHAT THEY LIKE it just don’t sit right to ME and I don’t agree w the stuff said in his audios tho he is very funny sometimes I just mainly would rather not... also hes creepy asf like hoe did you js peal my skin off huhu wtf

ANYWAYSSSSS THATS ALLL bu bai