#1. she forgets and 2. she doesn't actually realise she's doing it

[monty-glasses-roxy]

idea: Roxy goes into excited puppy mode when Cassie gets off the school bus and the other kids all yell "HI ROXY" and she is just THRIVING. the BEST part of her day

Yeeeeeesssss

Cassie's first day back at school has Roxy waiting for her to come back all day long and all that pent up energy from the day just explodes the second Cassie is back... Laying on the couch staring sadly at the door, waiting for the moment Eddie comes to get her so they can go pick her up from school or the bus stop or whatever. She hates school with a burning passion because Cassie should be able to do whatever she wants forever! This is such bullshit why can't Cassie stay and fuck around with her all day instead?! That's so unfair!!!

Honestly this is giving me the mental image of the bus passing the Plex and the second it does, Roxy leaps through the broken window and floors it down the street after it. Meteors Roxy (cause she's stuck in my brain) specifically just running full speed on her fours as fast as physically possible to reach the bus stop before Cassie's bus. First few times she does it, she howls a bit so Cassie definitely sees her running on the path beside the road, and now it's a daily thing lmao

Just a bus full of kids either cheering for the bus driver to go faster or cheering Roxy on as she races the bus everyday. Cassie is, of course, on Roxy's side every time, and it's actually remarkable how often she wins. The bus driver has taken to it and plays along sometimes, speeding up when the roads are quiet so the kids start cheering and slowing down to let Roxy catch up if something's caught her up like a group of slow walkers or something. They honk the horn as they go past the Plex and it's become the start sound of another race starting. They hear the beep beep of the bus and the kids swarm the windows to watch Roxy catapult herself out of the Plex window and rocket after them. The driver thought they'd had her one time, but she fucking barrelled around the corner and only just made it before the bus did lmao she got a congratulatory handshake for that one too she really did just rob them of the win dnjdnd

Cassie gets off the bus and is immediately flying tackled by a very out of breath Roxy. She's swept off her feet in a spinning hug, and if Roxy loses the race and is still running when Cassie steps off it? Well she meets her in the middle and they get to tackle eachother! It makes her feel so important and so loved it's unreal, especially because she knows one hundred percent that Roxy really does love her to bits and wouldn't go to this much effort for anyone else. The feeling is mutual, Cassie just can't fucking race a moving vehicle to show it lmao nsjdn. However, they've both been told they need to dial it down a bit because Roxy has bruised both of them a decent number of times with how hard she crashes into her... Cassie doesn't really care though, it just sort of stings after the fun wears off and later on when she pulls it too much. Totally worth it though!

And if there's a kid that doesn't believe that Roxy is Cassie's sister now? There's a whole bus load of kids that witness her racing the fucking bus everyday so she can see her again as soon as physically possible that can back them up lmao. She's a favourite among the kids on that bus, the door opens to kids cheering for her whenever she wins the race and for the bus driver whenever she loses. It's so fucking fun and the highlight of her and Cassie's day! It's something to look forward to for the kids at the end of the school day too, her antics are a little mood boost for some of them it's great! She sometimes wears a silly hat or costume for the added surprise of it lmao. That part was Sunny's idea of course, and Chica and Bonnie help her do it.

Ya know what too? If Bonnie or someone changes in Meteors and also starts doing it on occasion, the kids go wild cause now it's a THREE way race!! And holy shit Roxy is somehow faster than a giant rabbit how is that even possible?! She tells anyone that asks that it's pure skill, but Bonnie always says that she's so excited to Cassie every day that it lets her do the impossible with ease... Roxy doesn't really like that explanation cause it makes her sound soft as fuck but it also makes her sound pretty cool being able to do the impossible so... She's a bit torn lmao

And if Roxy isn't there for whatever reason? Everyone's asking Cassie what's wrong. Roxy got sick for a while and Cassie came back from school one day during that with a bunch of get well soon presents for her, Roxy feels so loved by this group of ten year olds she's never met lmao. Would be extra sweet if Roxy made a point to make something to give them all in return too as a thank you, like she and Cassie made cupcakes for everyone on the bus when she was feeling up to it or something. She's gotta make sure her adoring fans know she appreciates them, right? And Cassie doesn't mind being the middle man here. She finds it pretty satisfying to be able to have large groups of kids listen to her and be excited to see what she's brought them. It's pretty fun honestly! She enjoys it more than she expected to!

Cassie is just so important to Roxy that she'd race a bus to say hi... By sweeping her off her feet and swinging her around with joy because CASSIE'S BAAAACCCKKK!!!! WOOOO!!! BEST PART OF HER DAY, YOU RIGHT ANON!!! ESPECIALLY IF SHE BEAT THE BUS TOO!!! SHE'S WINNING AT EVERYTHING!!!

[neutron-stars-collision]

It's incredible how much everything changes when you rewatch p1, after seeing the whole thing at least twice. Especially episodes 1-2. The context of Colin's feelings, his confounding feelings, makes everything even better.

Because imagine this: he's on the tour of the continent, living the life, only no one responds to his letter or seems interested in his whereabouts. And if it were only the family? He'd probably be fine. Salty, but fine. Except it's Pen, his dearest friend who doesn't respond to his letter. Not once.

So, Colin spirals, decides to change his personality, become the man he thinks society expects him to be, starts documenting things in his journal where usually he'd write about them to Pen. Perhaps with time he stops writing letters to her completely, but he still misses her so much.

He comes back, a changed man, everyone's attention on him and his newly acquired swagger. Debutantes swoon over him and his new look. It's everything he wanted, except... Pen gives him the cold shoulder. Twice. Doesn't seem at all interested in his new persona. The flirting, which he has tried out on many unimportant women in the Ton doesn't work on the one woman who actually matters. He's confused and lost.

Once he realises what he has done to garner Penelope's anger, he instantly makes amends. Sheds the newly acquired armour to tell her just how much she means to him. Or at least as much as he's allowing himself to notice by that point. The confusion is still there, and it gets worse after the handshake because you cannot tell me he didn't feel a spark right then? He definitely did. And it was bewildering.

But, still, being the oblivious man he is, Colin pushes on with the mad and spontaneous plan to help Pen find a husband. Mostly because it gives him a chance to spend time with her. And suddenly this is all he wants to do. The only thing that provides genuine joy. Only in those brief moments with her he can be himself. He can be accepted.

And episode 2 showcases all of that perfectly. It shows Colin in a permanent state of confusion because not only are those moments with Penelope the only times he feels like his old self, but also now there's more. The constant desire to be alone with her, to trample over any left rules of propriety to steal just a moment of her attention. To help her because this is the only thing he's good at. To be useful. Then jealousy begins to brew because he has to watch Pen be her charming self with men that are not him. Slowly he begins to realise that perhaps he wants more than to be her friend. That perhaps she's never been just a friend.

By the time Pen asks for that kiss, Colin is terrified because he wants to kiss her. He wants to kiss her while knowing that it will mean something. It will mean something to him. Because Pen is home. Pen is everything he was looking for. And now that he has realised it there is no chance he can forget. The kiss only signs off that which was inevitable.

[ivys-garden]

Hivy, I'm Ivy, and it's time for..

Life Series Alliance Analysis Session Recap:

Scars Snail cam is the best thing to happen this season.

Yes, another week means another session of Wild Life and damn did this one live up to the name. This session's Wild Card was the Infamous immortal snail, an idea originating from a meme that asked if you would press a button to get one million dollars if it meant an unkillable Snail would Chase you and if it ever touched you, you'd die.

This session's snails were far more dangerous though, resulting in far more carnage and downright Junji Ito-Esk descriptions of the incredibly ominous snails. On session 3 there are already 3 reds on the server and, had Grian not called end of session early, we would have had a first player out. So much happened and yet no progress was made, let's see what the teams were up to.

Also, 34 DEATHS WHAT THE FU

The Fast And The Furious (Gem & Joel)

I'm not calling them the family. That name is already taken. And is also lame.

The dynamic duo start the session by immediately forgetting they're supposed to be trying to shake their Villainous reputation by vowing to convince everyone to kill Pearl & Impulse, an incredibly stupid plot for many reasons:

1.Everyone they convince sucks at they're job

2. By gems own admission, Impulse barely did anything to her

3.joel literally forgot about this, since it wasn't important

4. Pearl literally did nothing to her, she was just they're as Impulse was having a rake in there chest (no the poisoning doesn't count, Pearl would do that to anyone)

5. If Pearl is to be punished for just being in the area, then why aren't Cleo & Scott also punished?

6. Gem and Impulse have no interactions this session

7. Pearl and Impulse STILL don't realise Gem hates them

8. Gem repeatedly calls what she's doing “Social Deduction”... no.

Gem actually has a lot in common with Impulse, they're both being extremely ruthless for no reason (if these two become thr final two and there isn't an AMV of there journey through teh season set to Ruthlessness from Epic I will literally eat snow.)

How will this saga end? Idk but it's very funny. keep it up.

Apart from that Gem built a wall, befriended her Snail and neither died. Well done!

(Sidenote about the Gem-Impulse beef, people forget this since he hasn't mentioned it yet but Joel makes it his mission to kill Scott every season. These teams would still be against each other regardless of what Impulse did, which is also very funny)

The Final Girls - (Pearl, Scott, Cleo, Impulse & Bigb)

Oh Deer. That's a lot of deaths very early for the faverouites to win

So to start, Impulse’s Creeper farm is a bust and likely will never be seen again. Whoopsie.

The team also decided to move a smidge closer to everyone else. Due to the snails no substantial progress could be made on this endeavour from most of the team tho, luckily Pearl (after dying to her snail, immediately proving herself as the teams crash test dummy again) was able to get a grip on her snail and get the build started, unfortunately as Pearl is building it is almost certainly going to become a tower…. Oh Pearl also died again building it. What's up with her this season?

Moving on to the perpetual drama that I'd this team’s dynamic, where once again we see the contrast between how Tumblr acts like this team is and how they actually are, with everyone just having a grand old chill time joking around and petting dogs. Crazy to think that a team made of these 5 goober would actually ENJOY when they're teammates cause chaos, Hmm?

A lot of this team's session is actually spent apart, meaning that there isn't much to talk about with them. But Pearl is on Yellow now, meaning she is definitely killing someone next session (an action the whole team is one board with btw). Once again proving herself as the attack dog of the life Series, she asks the team who to hurt. Impulse tries to convince her to attack Ren for killing him, but Pearl shoots this down, once again proving that she is NOT ruthless like impulse. Remember everyone, Pearl might be a little chaos gremlin but she does need a reason to kill or she won't do it. She isn't actually just a murder machine like in double life

That's the funny thing about double life actually. Pearl has moved in from the tower, its everyone else who is stuck in it.

Anyway, grian has a big ol target on his back, we'll see how that Pan's out next week.

Oh also SNAIL RACE HELL YEAH MOTHER FU

The Bam-Boozelers (Scar, Lizzie & Jimmy)

Lizzie thinks snails are arthropods.

Remember when I said Jimmy was the only confident one on this team? Well I guess he didn't have the confidence brain cell this week because he died. He died so much. The entire session for these guys is pretty much just trying to save Jimmy.

This doesn't go very well at all. Jimmy is able to get one life back through a deal with Ren, but all other attempts to intentionally kill someone fall flatter than Scar in session one. At least he does take initiative and blow up Joel's Hidious-Horrible-No-Good-Mobile. Great work big man!

Aslo, Jimmy admitted to being the harvester of the end! The canary curse isn't dying g first it's dying RIGHT before the Finale! That's Canon! I was right! VINDICATION!

The Tuff Guys (Bdubs, Etho & Tango)

Word of advice, if you need to constantly say your tough, your not.

Somehow despite making literally negative progress, this team still managed to do a lot. Bdubs immediately starts the episode with some light gaslighting on account of being bdubs. After this it is decided he must “do something tuff” and so he is sent to go mess with the Bam-Boozelers.

Keeping up with tuff guy tradition, bdubs doesn't do anything. Instead he enlists the Bam Gang to help him make up a story about how totally bad and evil he is. Bdubs is also allowed to come stay with them when the tuff guys inevitably fall apart. An offer bdubs is willing to accept even after Jimmy & Scar get him killed.

In other tuff news, Etho is desperate to prove that he is super tuff and shows up to kill the Bam-Boozelers cows…while they're away meaning he did not have to display any tuffness. He literally just needed to be in and out before they got back. He also takes a second shot at the final girls at gem's request again, and like the first time it goes horribly. The first time he gets distracted by the snail dance party (who wouldn't) and when he remembers what he actually set out to do, the most tuff then he can think of is empty threats and mild littering. C- for effort.

And then there's poor unfortunate Tango, not only does he go to red this session but he also loses his house after being blamed for the cow deaths etho caused. Oh but don't worry he got revenge on scar… in a way that was easily repairable and did no actual damage apart from massively lowering his own reputation.

That is the great tuffness of the tuff guys everybody! They're failing at everything and getting overly stressed about shelled gastropods!

The Spanners (Grian, Mumbo & Skizz)

Grian seemed to think this card would be easy, and I geuss it is if you k ow what to expect and have one of your mates Snail watching you all episode.

Now, Skizz, majestic failure that he is, went yellow super quickly and so the entire session is spent trying to save his but in a multitude of ways, all of which skizz manages to fail at spectacularly. Grian does manage to save Ren from Yellow for about ten minutes and at the cost of any chance he had of Impulse not killing him.

Eventually skizz gave up on all the compilated plots and just wacked Lizzie until she died.

He then immediately got killed again God damn it skizz.

OK so skizz massively lowered they're reputation with the Bam-Boozelers for nothing AND Impulse's revenge meter is full and his team won't hold him back anymore AND I think Martyn might still be peeved at the Enchanter situation AND Tango probably still wants to kill them AND despite what grian says Gem and Joel don't seem to care about them beyond nudging them to kill Impulse so yeah these 3 are super dead, I give them like a session until one of them drops.

P.S Mumbo calls the Snail meme a “thought experment” and I found that very funny and I think you should too.

Also apparently Jimmy and Grian debate what to do about the snail all the time??

Renwood (Martyn & Ren)

There will be a live Snail reaction meme over yaoi of these two I just now it.

Fallowing they're arc of being nice this season, Renwood goes on a great friend finding journey, allying with Gem & Joel on the condition of totally being super mean to Impulse promise and forming a friends to the end Pack with Jimmy at the cost of a spare life.

Ren probably regrets that particular pact as, while trying to perform a great horse search, he loses a life. And another. And so he must kill, allying temporarily with the Spanners to get a kill on Impulse, something that he immediately regrets, proving he is less of a Rottwiler and More of a Labby. Luckily for ren he avoids Impulse's revenge list for now on account of apologising, getting instant Karma for it and the other final girls desperately holding Impulse back.

Martyn on the other hand has a far better time, gallivanting I'm the Nether with etho for potions (he died doing that but shhh), organising the great Snail dance party and joining up with fellow Chaos Gremlins Pearl and Impulse to have some fun with snails and tnt.

With potions in hand the Renwood duo and Etho got up to all sorts of mischief, turning ren invisible and making Scar's Snail invisible, resulting in him almost dying twice and being out of the series…oopsie.

Also Martyn sucks at explaining the Snail meme and thinks the all spice guy and kool aid man are the same person.

Predictions?

With more information comes the first Predictions from me.

●Someone goes out and soon. Probably Skizz or Scar. Jimmy will survive tho, after all the canary curse means he's the harbinger of the end of the series… though with how it's going, next session very well could be the end of the series.

●Grian Is getting murked next session, probably by Pearl.

● The tuff guys will fall apart. Bdubs will buy with the Bam-Boozelers, Etho with Gem and Joel and Tango will be left scrabbling for someone to team up with.

● Joel will try to get revenge on Jim for blowing up the car and will fail

● Etho will continue to look like a total loser

● One of the people yet to die loses a life next session.

So uh yeah. I'm gonna go lie down for until next week.

Until then I've been Ivy, and this has been… whatever this was.

[chuuya-kisser]

im finally free so that i can fucking scream abt bsd 117 and tell my thoughts on this heartbreaker of a chapter (will def make another post feeding my delusions)

(spoilers utc)

firstly.

ASAGIRI. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUXK ASAGIRI. ASAGIRI WHEN I CATCH YOU ASAGIRI I THOUGHT YOU WERE KILLING-YOUR-CHARACTERS-PHOBIC?????? NOW YOUVE MELTED TWO IMPORTANT CHARACTERS IN TWO CHAPTERS???? WHOS GONNA GO NEXT CHAPTER HUH WHO'S NEXT IN YOUR DEATH NOTE

well

Uh yeah so anyways basically heart broken for multiple reasons so we'll go in order

1- aya. oh my gosh aya. shes what, a ten year old?????? and in the span of a day, she has found out about a vampire lord who is responsible for destroying or saving the whole world, shouldered the responsibility of getting said vampire lord away from the enemy to save the world, developed a father-daughter relationship with said vampire lord, sacrificed herself and got saved by him, believed that the world could be saved now, saw her new father figure's body be torn apart and replaced by a greasy ratass who wants to destroy everything or whatever, with said new father's last words telling her to run to save herself, being saved by said father, then having him dissolve and die again in front of her eyes again. shes a ten year old. what the actual fuck. oh and don't forget, she doesn't know that she lost her other father figure too!

gosh she is going to be SO traumatised and even that is an understatement i really hope she has the strength to recover

2- so akutagawa is back huh? about time, about time (though im not very happy about the cost it took- but atleast he's back?)and he has agreed to protect aya on brams wish? thats surprising honestly, so im wondering if the stuff atsushi told him while fighting him at the airport or whatever affected his subconscious or something so that he consciously wants to start protecting people?

OR maybe! he sees a bit of himself in aya or smth? i mean look i dont exactly remember what happened before he met dazai and was taken in by him okay, dont come at me. but maybe he sees that terrified little kid and something stirs in him or smth anyways go akutagawa go you're her third father figure please dont die again ‼️

(also he looks so good-)

3- and the biggest bombshell

kunikida.

KUNIKIDA‼️‼️ NO NO NO THIS IS NOT ACTUALLY HAPPENING PEOPLE THIS IS NOT I REFUSE TO BELIEVE IT I AM IN DENIAL

just- THINK ABOUT EVERYONE. think about atsushi and tanizaki. who saw him disappear slowly in front of their eyes, to buy them time. think about fukuzawa. who wished for kunikida to be the next president because he was the most ideal. who cares so much, even if he doesnt show it as much. think about aya. she has such a deep bond with kunikida, and now she'll have to face the devastating news that one of the only people who truly believed in her is gone too. think about ranpo and yosano.

think about dazai. who is much too far away to do anything right now, who miscalculated once which led to him being too far to stop fyodors rampage in any way. who was truly doing all this because he wanted to keep the detective agency safe. who, when he realises what will happen next, his first thought is to warn them. who was his new partner, kept him alive, even made him a part of his schedules. who i think he must have to care for, even a little bit.

dazai, who thinks that anything worth wanting is always lost the moment he obtains it. and its happened again. and by the looks of it, it will happen again.

i genuinely want to know how he'll react but i dont want to at the same time. gods i cant fucking do this man

like huhhh asagiri are you tryna make me cry or some shit???? Because youre succeesing SPECTACULARLY

also- are we gonna see tanizaki get liquefied too next chapter? because this panel sure looks like it

im scared for september now like what else are you gonna throw at us, huh asagiri? and what do you mean i have to wait a whole month this is crazy

and i am STILL in denial and will continue to be in denial guys wdym, ofc kunikida is alive and well! hes coparenting aya with bram, having fun at the agency and stuff ‼️‼️ hes perfectly peachy theres no helicopter singularity out for everyone's lives!!! (wow this post is LONG)

[f4iry-bell]

WHO AM I? | 2

pairing: nerd grayson x popular reader

warning: miscommunication? indirect mention of segs but nothing direct or explicit.

taglist (permanent) : @unnoodles @nqds @alwaysthefangirl @clarissaweasley-10 @benny1989fredd @imaseabear @never-enough-novels @elysianwayy77 @whatsamongus @sheisntyou @emelia07 @cassie6392

series taglist: @inmyheaddd

word count: 1.4k

a/n: hope you guys like it, next part will have grayson with GLASSES. JAMIE CAMEO AND MY JAMIE X NERD READER FIC CROSSOVER LOWKEY

part 1 | masterlist

Grayson tried hard not to think about her because he knew that she would have probably forgotten about him by now. There is nothing interesting about him anyway, unlike her. It was getting harder and harder for him to ignore her because they share a class, and well now his Instagram feed is filled with her because he made the mistake of stalking her page the night after their little disagreement. In defense, she was too pretty not to stalk, and everything about her was attractive.

_

Unlike what Grayson might think, Grayson was in her head. Everytime her ‘friends’ say something to her his words will be playing in her head like a broken record. She realised it first when she told her friend Lily that she got an A in her business class and Lily said “Thanks to Grayson. Don't you love being pretty and doing nothing?” in a mocking way. Lily didn't believe her when she said she actually worked on the project, and even caught up on the lessons. 

But Lily laughed “You? Stop joking. You barely know what is going on in class.”

“I do!” She protested but Lily just kept making fun of her for being dumb as if she is anything better. On top of this, the guys she's friends with acted like jerks making awful inappropriate accusations about her and Grayson. She denied them all, but she didn't like how they responded.

“Of course. You wouldn't go for someone with no social status in college.” One of them said. 

Everything after that evening was just proving Grayson’s point. She noticed how mad her friends get when she posts them and forgets to tag them in her story. Or how they'd always want her to post the best pictures of them and always post the pictures in which she isn't that great. It was tiring at one point. 

After two weeks of this realisation and madness she texted Grayson. 

Hey, I'm sorry for calling you a jerk. You were right about my ‘friends’ ;/ 

To which Grayson replied immediately.

G:It's alright. 

Are you mad at me?

G: Why would I be?

Because…I was rude to you.

G: It's fine. I forgive you.

Thanks xo

Grayson wanted to text further and keep the conversation going but he just liked the message and left. Truth is he didn't know what to text her. He knows her but he doesn't know her enough to keep a conversation going. But lucky for him she texted him. She double texted him. It must mean something, right?

Are you asleep?

G: No.

Me too. Also may I know why you're so anti-social? You are sort of cold but sometimes you even crack funny jokes, a VERY interesting person. If you just try, people would love to be friends with you.

G: I don't like people, they're annoying. Always in my business.

Oh! 

G: Yeah.

Good night, gotta sleep.

He didn't know what to reply to, so he just liked and left it. Did he do something wrong? Why didn't she keep the conversation going? He got comfortable in bed to text her for another hour or however long she wanted. 

_

It was the Harvard and Yale football match. Normally Grayson would look into crypto currency or read the newspaper but since his brother Jameson Hawthorne is coming to see the match he has no choice but to go. He wore a burgundy shirt paired with beige pants, he didn't exactly ditch his suits but his brothers forced him quit wearing suits to college, they said someone might mistake him for the professor. Grayson was sitting on the bleachers waiting for Jameson who was late. He looked around taking in his environment and his eyes landed on her. She always stood out from the crowd, she was sitting with her ‘friends’ but she wasn't talking, she was just on her phone. Her hair was done up to a high ponytail, and she was wearing a red sweater. She looked so beautiful.

“How long are you going to stare?” Grayson immediately looked up to see Jameson standing with snacks.

“I wasn't staring.” Grayson tried to deny it.

“Sure.” 

“I wasn't.”

“Look! She's looking at you!” Jameson pointed which got an immediate reaction from Grayson. He looked back at her to find her still on her phone. “So?”

“So?”

“Who is she?” Jameson asked.

“No one.”

“Didn't act like no one the way you looked.” Jameson smirked.

“A friend, I think.”  he wasn't sure.

“You think? Tell me what is it with her?” He asked.

“There's nothing.” Grayson told him.

“You sound like you want something to be there, though.” Jameson read his face.

“Stop analysing me, I thought you were skipping your psychology classes.” Grayson said.

“That was before.”

“Before what?”

“I'll tell you mine, if you tell me about her and what's with you and her.” He asked.

“There isn't anything, Jamie. We didn't hit off well at the start—”

“I'm shocked!” Jameson commented to which Grayson glared. “Sorry, continue.”

“And then we were assigned as project partners. We did more than just the project—”

“You said nothing!” Jameson interrupted.

“—As in we studied. Will you stop interrupting? And I told her that her friends I'll treat her, she was in denial, called me a jerk. She came to realise. She apologised, we texted and then suddenly everything was…off? I don't know why, I thought she wanted to be friends or talk. I don't exactly know what I was expecting but when she stopped texting me, I was disappointed” He tried his best to put everything together.

“Woah. Okay, show me your texts.” Jameson demanded.

“No.”

“I'll help you.”

“With what?”

“To get her! You clearly like her or else wouldn't fret about a girl not texting you!” He took his phone out and gave it to Jameson, Jameson read their texts and spoke.

“You told her you don't like people.” He said.

“I did. Which is true.”

“Idiot. She probably thought she was annoying you by texting you.” Jameson chuckled.

“What? No. I wanted her to text me.” 

“Well, you gotta up your game. Tell her that you like talking to her, ask her out.”

“No! She doesn't know me well enough for me to ask her out.”

“Well, just tell her that you didn't mean everyone, okay?” 

_

Grayson thought of texting her but he decided to tell her directly. He walked to her table in the cafeteria and waited for her to turn to him. Her friend noticed him first.

“Another group project, nerd?” Lily said, rolling her eyes.

“Stop it, Lily.” She stood up from her seat to talk to Grayson. “Hey.” 

“Hi.” He was so nervous.

“What is it?” She asked.

“Can…Can we talk?” God, did he just stutter?

“Uh, sure.” 

They both walked further away from the table and then he spoke.

“A few days ago when I texted you saying I don't like people…” His heart was beating so fast, she looked so pretty he couldn't focus.

“yeah?”

“I didn't mean you.”

“Huh?”

“You, I like you.”

Her eyes widened.

He immediately spoke. “As in, you're not bad, not like I like you romantically, I like you because you're nice. You're not everyone.” His words came out so fast.

She chuckled. “I got it, Grayson. No worries. Is that all?”

“Yes.”

“Well, thanks for saying. I actually thought I was annoying you.” She chuckled.

“Jamie was right.” He mumbled, which she heard.

“Who is Jamie?”

“My brother.”

“Oh?” She was so confused.

“He was the one who told me that you might have thought that I included you in the ‘everyone’” He chuckled awkwardly.

“You told your brother about me?*m” She asked with a smile.

“He sort of forced it out of me.”

Her smile widened. “I'm glad that you did. Because I kind of missed you.”

His heart stopped and started beating again. “You did?”

“Yeah. I missed how you randomly say random facts or one of your many talents.”

He blushed. He actually blushed.

She chuckled at his reaction. “Hey, do you want to hang out after college? There is a party.”

“Party isn't really my scene.”

“Oh, okay. Sorry.”

“Don't apologise. And I'll be there.”

Her eyes lightened up. “Well, okay.” She chuckled. “Have you been to one before?”

“2”

“Woah. Mine is like 20 times or something” she chuckled. “I'll send you the details. 

part 3 →

[ethereal-night-fairy]

How do you think Slasher!Soap would react if one day he went to see Suicidal!Reader and she had decided to take matters into her own hands?

Do you think he would be sad that she took her own life or would he not care at all? Would he be sad/mad because he didn't do it himself or sad because deep down he cared for her?

Hi anon!

The answer depends on the how much time he has spent with reader I would say.

1-2 Months in: If it happened in this time frame I think he would be more annoyed that the reader sabotaged his game a second time. He's frustrated that he didn't get to see his plan through.

6+ Months: At this point he's gotten to know reader quite a but maybe not to the extent he wants to but he's getting there. I feel like he's developed some type of affection for reader now so when he found out they ended things he's annoyed but he blames it on not being the one to kill them. He'll try to hide his feelings but he's definitely hurt. Probably blames himself he couldn't get reader out of that headspace even if his end goal was to kill them. He wanted them happy before it happened. He definitely reminiscs about their time together before moving on to his next victim.

1 year in: He's fallen in love at this point. Forget the killing part. He's found a new kind of high playing CNC scenes with them. (Not really sure if it's CNC though since reader only agrees because they think he's going to finally kill them but he never does). If he's in a murder mood he goes out to find someone else. It doesn't even cross his mind to kill reader anymore. Well not until they're fully healed and happy (that's what he keeps telling himself but no amount of happiness is good enough in his eyes). Reader isn't healed or happy, far from it actually. Especially not being in this weird fucked up relationship with Soap. Though they've gotten better at fooling Soap in hopes he'll finally end things. I think he'd lose his mind if it happened while he was away for another kill. He'll have a mental breakdown when he finds them cold and motionless. He'll realise that he was just making things worse and he pushed them to the edge. He might even try to take his own life because of the grief.

[glennquackmire]

WE NEED LORE FOR THE HUNGER GAMES AU !!!! 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🥶🥶🥶🥶🥶😛😛😛😛😛😞😞😞😞

OMG OMG OK SO

This was originally really long but I'll do a better version of it ok so (hi chat I'm re reading this now cos it's not like 2am and I'm realising how bad this is I'll re explain it soon I promise ☝️☝️) (me again this is so ass I keep getting like flashbacks to how corny this is I'm rewriting it all as we speak cause this is so bad AND ooc AUGHHHHHHHHGHGGF)

-the curtis bros live in district 12 and their parents died in a mining accident

-darry (he's 18 in this) and pony are reaped ik I just said he volunteers for soda but I'm editing this rn and I'm taking that out LMAOO (I had to make it any 2 because there just isn't enough girls in the outsiders for one girl one boy 😭)

-ponyboy believes darry genuinely despises him (WRONG) and thinks that darry is going to try kill him once they get in the arena so he spends most his time in there trying to get away from him

-meanwhile darry spends all his time trying to FIND ponyboy w his fancy career ally paul (I like to pretend he's an important character) he's from district 4 or WAS lolol get it cause he's dead

-the arena is foresty but its also got this really cliffy area that overlooks this huge body of water (that's important i swear)

-so the other ppl who are reaped are:

>dally and johnny from the lumber district: their main tactic is to stay together but that's more of a support thing because johnny is convinced he doesn't have a chance and dally is super confident bro is SWINGING that axe

>tim from the textile district: he had to leave curly and Angela to fend for themselves so he's DESPERATE to get home (post traumatic eldest sibling disorder)(ily tim)

>the careers marcia and randy (District 1) cherry and bob (District 2) Paul and ik there's other socs but I forget their names (District 4): their main tactic is to travel in groups of 2 and pick off the weakest tributes at first and then come together

>scouts here she's from the technology district hi scout

>oh and also Steve and twobit are also here LITERALLY just because I think they're a funny duo they do NOT last long I fear #divadown

-dally and johnny are also super codependant in this and if johnny were to (hypothetically) get murked by a tribute (hypothetically) dally would end up like he did in the book perchance idk they make me really sad these two are doomed in every universe

-eventually after most of the ppl are dead darry amd pony rerun into eachother and that's when ponyboy starts to realise darry does not infact want him dead and their beef is as good as over too bad it doesn't last lolol

-i wanted to add a reference to tge actual book to look smart into this so instead of their being those mutant dog mutts that chase them instead it's a HUGE fire that burns the entire arena and pushes them to the top of the cliff and when it gets down to the final 2 darry willingly steps into it so ponyboy can live which ik that's kinda corny but anyway

-I have a whole storyline in my mind for each of the characters if anyone wants to hear more tell me NEOW

[polysyndetonaddictsupportgroup]

what would megumi’s life have been if he was actually raised by the zenin from day one? like either gojo lost the custody battle or they were able to scoop him up before gojo ever reached them. i doubt they would want to keep tsumiki with them so she’s not there for little baby megs.

i think it would be really cool to see a zenin raised megumi interacting with his fellow classmates when he attends the school, not to mention the contrast between him and gojo. like on paper they both should have gotten the same treatment-being pampered and spoiled rotten but we also know that the zenin think that hurting little kids makes them stronger so it would be super interesting to see megumi realise that the stuff that happened to him wasn’t normal and for gojo to have a guilt trip bc he wasn’t able to help megumi when he needed someone to help him the most.

So I have a fanfic that I’ve half written (no idea if I’ll ever finish it—I’d love to, it’s just hard to find the time) about EXACTLY THAT that I talked about in this post for an ask game.

That being said, that entire thing happens from Tsumiki’s perspective, and I agree with you—I don’t think the Zenin would have ever actually taken her too. They don’t want her. She’s not Zenin. She’s not a sorcerer. They only bought Megumi. For the most part, Megumi is absent from that post, and you asked about Megumi. So this is what I think would happen on Megumi's side of that post I linked.

It comes down to two things:

1. He is never, ever happy with the Zenin.

2. He never lets go of his sister.

Megumi’s old enough to remember Tsumiki when the Zenin take him away. He's old enough to love her. And I think that Megumi loves very quietly, but he also loves very violently. He wouldn't let his sister hold his hand on the walk to school, but he would sacrifice himself for her future.

I think the Zenin took him from his sister, and I think he kicked and screamed and wasn't strong enough. I think they thought he would forget her eventually.

And then I think he bit most of the Zenin Clan.

At the end of the day, what Megumi wanted was the one thing the Zenin were not willing to give him. They were never like the Gojo clan, they were never going to pamper him, but there are a great many things in this world that they would give the Ten Shadows finally returned to them. But they would not give him a non-sorcerer, non-Zenin sister who would only be a weakness to him. They refused to let him have any contact with his sister, and that was the source of a lot of what soured.

Any Megumi that was taken in by the Zenin would have been taken in to Naobito's household directly. He would be announced as the one who finally inherited their most cherished technique, and he would be declared heir, and the Zenin would call him beloved for it.

They would keep him in a room that was large and empty and almost always dark, and he wouldn't be allowed to decide when he slept or woke, and the door would always be locked from the outside. They would give him a wardrobe of expensive clothes that he hated, and he would never get to pick which of them he wore.

Megumi would hate them. He would hate all of them.

He's just not the type to be comfortable with or enjoy the adoration of others--especially when it's not backed up by genuine love. Megumi is someone who very much values sincerity and depth to emotion--it's one of the reasons why he seems to respect Yuuji so much. Yuuji is a good person who follows through with what he says. He's not just going to talk about wanting to save people--he's there making the sacrifices as he does it.

The Zenin do not actually love him. And he knows it. He's experienced love before, and this isn't it.

They love the idea of him. The fantasy of him that lives in their heads. He has no interest in being their little god prince to contend with the Gojo's own. He knows who he is, and it's not this. He wants to go home. He wants to find his sister again. He doesn't want to do this anymore.

And I think that's a feeling Megumi never escape: he just didn't want to do this anymore.

Megumi would feel like a bug pinned beneath glass in the Zenin compound. He would constantly have people managing him--when he ate, what he ate, what he wore, when he slept, when he woke, when he trained, what he did. Having to become a jujutsu sorcerer signified an inherent loss of control, but it's nothing compared to the sheer objectification that he goes through when the Zenin have exclusive control over him.

He has no power of what clothes he wears. How his hair is styled. His schedule, his diet, the people he speaks too--he's suffocating and the Zenin are just increasing pressure on him.

I don't think Gojo ever thought that would be Megumi's life.

We’re gonna just have this imagining exist in the same world as the Tsumiki centric fic described in the linked post, and in that, the reason why Gojo never took him in was because he didn’t know Megumi had a sister. He showed up, saw the divine dogs, realized Megumi had the Ten Shadows, and decided he couldn’t do this. He was a mess. He was grieving Suguru and Haibara. Megumi looked just like the man who killed Riko, and apparently inherited the fucking Ten Shadows of all the goddamn things. The Zenin would lose their shit, and Gojo didn’t have the energy to fight and told himself he didn’t need to, because if Megumi was the Ten Shadows he’d be cared for like a prince with the Zenin. He turned around and left and spent the rest of his life with Megumi in the back of his mind, always nagging him with whether he made the right decision. It wasn’t until Maki got there and made a few worrisome references to Megumi's standard of living that he started to really worry that he had made the wrong one, and it wasn't until he found out about Tsumiki that he knew it was the wrong decision.

It's like this: The Zenin hurt Megumi in every world.

It would be bad no matter what, but it really gets bad because Megumi refuses to stop trying to get back to Tsumiki. She's his sister. They didn't have anyone or anything in this world, but they had each other, and he couldn't let these people just take her away. He’s feral about it. He refuses to fit the mold they keep trying to cram him in. He’s trying to scale the walls to escape. He’s increasingly desperate and angry and the Zenin are getting more and more frustrated the longer he fights them. He’s the heir to the clan, and he can’t stop trying to leave it to get back to some random girl who isn’t his real sister and isn’t someone they’ll ever allow him to have.

It gets bad.

They put him under increasingly strict levels of control. He’s constantly being trained, which means he's constantly being hurt. He’s not allowed to speak to anyone without the clan head’s approval. He is under absolutely constant guard after he manages to get over the wall and halfway to his old neighborhood before they catch him again. Tsumiki’s name is not allowed to be said aloud, or his old name. He forgets his name used to be Fushiguro, but he doesn’t forget Tsumiki. He doesn’t let himself.

I think it escalates until it hits a breaking point. Megumi becomes increasingly self-destructive and non-responsive to everything they try. They push him to extremes that start risking permanent damage.

I think Megumi would try to hurt himself, eventually.

He wouldn't be in his right mind. He's in the most shit situation possible. He's undergoing pretty severe abuse. He'd be at the end of his rope from the lack of control over his own life, and he'd be spiteful as hell towards the Zenin. And the only thing he has to hurt them with is himself.

As a character, Megumi has always considered his own sacrifice as an acceptable means to the end of getting back at someone. Mahoraga, intrinsically, requires him killing himself as a way of killing someone else. He'd hurt himself if it was the only way he had of hurting them.

Naobito would cover it up. He'd never, ever want the rest of the clan to find out that it happened. It was already bad enough that Megumi openly hated them--he couldn't have the Zenin seeing any vulnerability in what was meant to be their most powerful member. He'd put Megumi in total lockdown until he could make it all go away.

Then they'd make a deal.

A binding vow. Megumi could never purposefully hurt himself again. He could never again try to leverage his own safety against the clan.

And in exchange, Tsumiki would be taken care of.

The last time Megumi saw his sister, she was on a sinking ship. They were running out of food, money, options--he doesn't know if she even has food anymore. He doesn't know if she lost the apartment or if there's still running water.

They're not letting him see her. But they are letting him take care of her. He can sacrifice another piece of control over himself, and she'll never have to worry about money again. They'll pay for her housing, her food, her education, for her every desire for as long as she lives. The trust the Zenin set up for her will be a generous one, and it will be managed meticulously by a trustee who can make sure she'll be provided for until she's old and grey. And Naobito will vow to never hurt her or send someone else to hurt her. She'll be safe. She'll be taken care of.

Megumi makes the deal.

In the end, the deal's what sort of breaks him.

Because he doesn't promise to stop looking for her, but the Zenin manage to make it a part of the terms anyway. When they approach Tsumiki's mother with the offer to be her family's beneficiary, they include a requirement that Tsumiki be moved to another city entirely with no forwarding address given. She needs to be somewhere that Megumi can never find her again.

The Zenin keep the old apartment. They pay the rent every month. And the next time Megumi manages to make it off compound, they let him make it all the way there before dragging him home. They let him see the empty apartment with all its empty rooms.

Naobito wants him to know that Tsumiki's gone. He wants him to know that he'll never find her again.

He tries to run a few more times after that, but he never makes it very far. He doesn't have anywhere to go.

In the linked post, Megumi finds Tsumiki, just once. She's on a class trip. He's on one of his very few and far between allowed excursions off the compound grounds, and he sees her in the crowd and recognizes her, and he ducks away from his escort before anyone can stop him.

She remembers him. He didn't think she would do that.

She tries to save him. He didn't think she would do that either.

She still loves him. And he was always too afraid to hope she would do that.

It goes the same way it did the first time. There's a car, and the Zenin shove him in it. She's on the outside, and he's trapped within, and he wishes she didn't scream so loudly when it happens. The sound never seems to leave his dreams.

His sister still loves him. Naoya hits him in the back of the head. He wakes up, and it was like she was never there at all.

But they hit him harder, after. Like they're trying to beat the memory of her out of him. He has even less freedom, when he already had next to none at all.

But he still has a sister. He has a place to go that isn't here. He just has to figure out where that is.

He wouldn't really have anyone in the Zenin clan. Most people are just... weird about him. Naoya's violently abusive. Naobito's weird and violently abusive. Everyone wants him to be someone he's not.

Maki would be his favorite.

He doesn't care about whether she's got cursed energy--his sister didn't have any. And she's obviously strong. She doesn't treat him like a divine blessing or try to force him to act a certain way. I think they would have genuinely liked each other, but kept each other at a distance. They're both trapped in an abusive situation and keep themselves safe by keeping everyone else at arm's length.

He would have been happy to see her get out, though. He would have told her that she could have his spot as heir or head or whatever when she came back if she wanted it. She would have told him that if he ever got out... well, fuck it. They could be something then. Family. Whatever the fuck they weren't allowed to be here.

She would have told him she's sorry, and she would have meant it. The only one she she regretted more than Megumi was Maki. He would have told her not to be, that if she dared to be sorry for getting out that he would never forgive her, and he would have meant that too.

I think his relationship with his own techinque would be very different in a world where the Zenin raised him. In canon, his issue is that he doesn't view himself as someone who could be powerful or win in the long run, but in this world, all he ever hears is how powerful he is. Pride of the fucking Zenin. The most powerful of them in centuries. Meant to rival Gojo fucking Satoru himself.

I think his real issue would be controlling it.

His technique would be a source of negative associations for him. It's the reason why the Zenin took him away. Most of his interactions with it have involved getting beaten and hurt by either his family or a high-level curse they shoved him in front of. I think he'd have a lot more firepower under his belt than at the start of canon, but he'd have less of a fine tuned control over it.

He lost control over his own life because of his shadows. It think that would manifest in struggling to control his own shikigami at times. he's not as in-sync with them as he is in canon.

Eventually, he'd go to Jujutsu High. He would be the only one in the first year class at the beginning, just like in canon. And he'd finally meet Gojo Satoru, the man he's supposed to topple.

He looks at Megumi really goddamn weird.

He's... enthusiastic. About. Teaching. He guesses. And constantly asking prying questions about the Zenin, but not in the sort of way he'd expect from a rival. In the sort of way he'd expect from someone concerned about him. Which is stupid. And annoying. And weird. He keeps a distance from everyone. They've all heard about the Zenin clan heir, and he has no interest in having to fit or break whatever mold they've already cast him in. He's better off on his own.

Maki's there. She's cordial where other people can see it, and in private, she takes care of him in a way that's terrifyingly close to familial. He's not sure if he likes it. He's not Mai, and she's not Tsumiki, and they both want someone they can't have.

She isn't sorry she left. She is sorry she left him. He can hate her for it all he goddamn pleases.

Of course, if this is in the same world as the linked post, Megumi finds Tsumiki again. He finds her in Sendai.

He gets to keep her, this time.

Gojo Satoru, of all the goddamn people, intervenes and becomes his sister's benefactor. It's super fucking weird. He won't stop looking at Megumi strangely. He won't stop insisting that he didn't know he had a sister, like that matters.

That would sort of be the first time in a long time that life actually gets better for Megumi.

I think he would ask to go by Fushiguro again, once he asks Tsumiki what his name used to be. He'd ask her if she minded it, him taking the name again, and he'd ask the rest of the school to call him Fushiguro instead of Zenin.

Predictably enough, Naobito loses his shit when he finds out, but it's not nearly as big of a pain in the ass as he thinks it is? Because Gojo intervenes.

Gojo keeps intervening.

It drives Megumi nuts, because if anyone was supposed to hate him, it was this guy. If anyone was supposed to be against him, it was this guy. This is the guy he was supposed to rival. This is the guy who killed his shitheel bio dad.

Gojo's just... good to him. He keeps him safe. He keeps him safe from his own goddamn family, and that's--no one's ever done that. No one's ever protected him from the Zenin.

The Zenin try to remove him from the Tokyo campus and move him to Kyoto the second they find out Tsumiki's there, and Gojo just... says no. It causes an uproar, and he doesn't fucking budge. It's treading dangerously close to him kidnapping the Zenin clan heir, his refusal to let them remove him from the Tokyo campus, and he doesn't care about whatever problems it causes him.

Megumi's his student. He doesn't want to leave. So Gojo won't let them take him.

He personally goes to Kyoto and collects him, the one time the Zenin force him into a car and move him when Gojo's off on a mission. He tells the higher ups to get fucked. He changes Megumi's student I.D. to read Fushiguro, and he causes problems for Yaga and the assistants until they start calling him Fushiguro as well.

Megumi's different with the other students once his sister is there.

He's more connected with them. He becomes best friends with Kugisaki and Itadori. He gets closer with the second years. He's visibly happier, and it sort of casts in sharp contrast how unhappy he was before this.

And Gojo? Gojo's so goddamn sorry. He didn't know megumi had a sister.

The thing is that now that both Tsumiki and Megumi are on campus, it sort of haunts Gojo with what could have been. They're both fantastic kids--funny, smart, resourceful. And it's painful watching them try to rebuild what was taken from them. And it could have just. never happened. Because he could have saved them both. He could have been their family.

It's sort of painfully obvious the Zenin abused Megumi, and it fucking haunts him. He doesn't even have to read into Megumi's behavior--he sees it happen, right in front of him, with how they try to control him and push him around. He wants to kill them for it. He wants to hate himself for it. He could have saved Megumi and he just. He didn't.

He wishes he did.

[tartarduck]

words about tot chapter 9

Gave myself a solid day to stew in my thoughts about ch9 and I just want to say that mihoyo is EVIL for timing it right before the anniversary. I don't know if I can be happy knowing Luke is suffering all alone in every conceivable universe other than his personal story/card timeline.

Point 1: How the chapter explored Luke's feelings of guilt for... Existing I guess?

I've been eagerly awaiting the reveal of Luke's survivor's guilt. The whole [wanting spirits to exist so he can at least apologise, or do SOMETHING, but knowing they don't] is such exquisite angst. I'm very happy they took the effort to write it in (though fortune tellers actually scare me in real life).

And now onto the related Point 2: Luke's feelings of guilt for literally everything else

I was reading through Luke's birthday greetings, and realised how often he calls himself greedy for literally wanting anything. God damn, SHE IS YOUR GIRLFRIEND IT'S NOT GREEDY OF YOU TO WANT TO SPEND TIME WITH HER --

That aside, it comes back to the theme of Luke Pearce's thought process, which in my brain goes a little something like this:

Good thing happens -> I do not deserve this

Bad thing happens -> It is completely my fault and no one else's

Which, might I add, vaguely reminded me of something from a lecture I forgot from my psych undergrad years. I'm worried for you, Luke. Please, Dr Yishmir, refer him to one of your colleagues for mental health.

In his personal 'route', he finally starts to come around with the idea that sometimes bad things... just happen and it's no one's fault (thank you, strategically placed rainbow in iridescent heartbeat). But in the main story? He's been feeling guilty ever since he saw MC after avoiding her for YEARS. There's no Aaron meddling with the two of them, or MC helping him clean his mess of a house to kick-start a card story. This is the man who hid in the attic after sending his confession after a YEAR of dates with MC -- the main story doesn't even give him a chance to start forgiving himself.

Basically, Luke Pearce is a mess in the main story, because everything that makes him un-messy happens by pure chance.

Point 3: Luke's black and white thinking of good and bad

One of the highlights of this chapter for me was Luke's anecdote about him faking a cold so MC would go out with her other friends and forget about him. Now, that's all well and good until he compares himself to the mum with Munchausen's syndrome, who is the closest thing we get to a 'villain' in this chapter. On top of his guilt, this whole I'm either a good or completely bad person mindset is really not doing favours for his mental health.

His anecdote also happens to be an interesting parallel to shape of you, because I remember Luke specifically wished to be forgotten in that card. He wants what's best for MC (because he thinks that he's taking everyone's love from her) but he also wants something for himself. And because he doesn't believe he's able to do both, but also because he isn't able to let go of his 'selfishness' sometimes, he thinks he's an awful person.

And now, to the last to do in my rant agenda.

Point 4: what happens in chapter 12. (Spoilers for CN server, but only about the Luke scene)

1. Ohmygod. He's going to run away. I can't see main story Luke NOT blaming himself for nearly hurting the MC. In whichever timeline, his priority is to keep her safe, and god, if he thinks he's a danger to her, the only way to keep her safe would be by disappearing again.

2. I'm going to read too much into this but MC trying to get Luke to recognise her while she's being pinned to the ground is such delectable angst. He's always worried that she'd forget about him -- whether it was the 8 years or literally just hanging out with other kids at school. But here she is, in a situation where he's essentially forgotten about her. The voice that my brain concocted up for MC was extra desperate in that scene.

Anyway, that's all I had to say about the recent main story developments in ToT. Keep the angst coming, writing staff. What a power move to send this out right before anniversary on BOTH servers. If there's anything I've taken away from this, it's that Luke stans are absolutely unhinged. Twitter circle people, I see you requesting more angst. How can we get even angstier than Luke nearly hurting MC while he's dressed in the outfit that he wears for his proposal card ??

[greypetrel]

"Shoes are an evil way to oppress people and I won't wear them." cit.

Finally finished with her clothes concepts! (the first plan was doing 6 of them... Oops, I guess)

Aisling's wardrobe/story through clothes. Guess her favourite colour. Some notes under the cut!

Alyra | Raina| Aisling | Radha )

She loves colours. She has a palette she loves best (teal - purple - yellow) and would stick to it. In Haven she just borrowed the plainest, more muted clothes she could find to blend in better with the rest and not stick out so much. Stopped braiding her hair back to hide her tattoos and look less like a fish out of water and take some attention away from herself. She had to be convinced to go back to leg wraps (it's an extra pair of Solas she adapted to her size).

The teal doublet in her Casual Skyhold attire was the one thing she really asked for when Josephine and Leliana cornered her down to choose a wardrobe that was tailored on her. She doesn't really care all that much for clothes, she just... Hinted at Josie her colour palette, the fact that she doesn't like restrictive skirts and hates shoes, and a couple of infos on how the Lavellans dress up to compliment her wardrobe and bring something of home with her.

"And then, everything changed when the Inquisition Nation attacked". I realise afterwards, I would say I'm sorry if I actually were, but I'm not.

Halamshiral: I did two variations, number 1 is more inspired by Orlesian fashion, the silhouette is Orlesian but with a Dalish twist. I like the colours and how it brings to her formal outfit, but meh. Number 2 is the one I got with and what she actually wore. She couldn't be turned down from wearing a more disctinctly Dalish style dress to that ball, she just conceded in wearing shoes underneath (no socks, she slipped off her shoes to explore the palace and silk stockings would just be pointlessly ruined). Number 3 is the more historically accurate version, fully 1643 fashion I drew for the Three Musketeers inspired series. I kept it because I'm affectionate to it.

Wedding: She pulled it out in Lavellan style in maybe half an hour, braided some elfroot for her crown and picked some forget-me-nots from a flower bed. No she's not feeling very well, the Anchor is flaring and she lost weight.

Post-Trespasser in the Fereldan countryside, embracing local hairstyles. New foot thingies Dagna designed to be easier to pull on and off by herself with just one hand. She begrudgingly admitted that skirts are not that impractical. Lots of heavy sweaters because IT COLD. I wanted to paint some tartan so here you go, there's no really any more reason to it.

[artharakka]

Can I ask you where have you found inspiration for your art? For example I've noticed you have a very specific (and beautiful) way you draw jewelry and clothing. The shapes are very organic yet grounded at the same time, give a bit of a Nausicaä vibes, as well as art noveau meets iron age.

Honestly I could go on and on about the beautiful details of your art but I don't want to seem too fangirlish :D

Ohhh thank you I love those comparisons 🧡 Because I didn't even know those are the vibes I was going for but yeah that's great actually... This is like when one of you made a playlist inspired by my art... (I still have that saved btw! 🧡 And I still cannot believe!!). Here's a little Rhiam drawing with some jewelry she doesn't (yet) have in canon (earrings she does have but she cannot use them yet)

But what are my inspirations hmmmmmmm many! Idk even what all I have inhaled into my art but I try to list something (this got long so rest under cut):

Nature 🌿 I love both mundane (sparrows, plants growing from asphalt cracks, moss covered street signs... the little details) and grand formations that fill me with awe. There's something about things so vast that take my breath away. Like oceans, mountains, high cliffs, endless tundra, wind so strong you could lean against it, ancient stone that has been scraped visible by massive sheets of ice thousands of years ago. (But I'm guilty of not being that impressed by conventional beauty of average gardens. Aren't people tired of only finding planted blooming flowers beautiful!). Most often I'm drawing inspiration from nature familiar to me, that being Nordic/Scandinavian ones.

I already said nature but birds deserve a special mention! Agh I just love those funky little animals 🦅

Stories! I love making stories, I think they help me grasp and go over my thoughts. I love pouring myself into my characters, it makes them feel both personal but also makes it easier to talk about myself to my fellow storytellers. I'd love to do a long graphic novel or write a book one day, but I also love making ttrpg stories just for and with our little group 🧡 For a long time I felt kinda bad that I wasn't doing "real art" that wasn't just illustrations of my characters. But then I realised doing art for arts sake doesn't really inspire me. I don't want to do art that I'd think would be easily consumable nor do I have any great performance to create with my art. I just love to illustrate stories and tell stories through my art and I think that's great! I still love seeing and experiencing artworks that aren't this illustrative, I just don't have the motivation to do that myself. But I can get really excited of works like Emma Jääskeläinen's granite sculptures!

Other artists! There are two categories I think: 1) those whose work I've seen (usually irl) and whose technique or themes or symbolism facinates me. I usually don't want to create similar art, or replicate their style, or medium even. But there's something about them, a feeling of awe or they feel formidable. Or there's something clever about them that lets me have this sense of epiphany. For example, Jääskeläinen who I already mentioned, Marcel Dzama, Merja Palin, Helena Vaari, Marika Mäkelä, to name a few I've seen lately-ish. And then 2) there are artists whose stories and/or style inspires me and influences my art. One of the biggest inspirations to my softer line art style was and is @albabbgg. @serpentface has some really cool worldbuilding and designs, I think they were also a great influence to how I draw bodies these days. @wiltkingart has also very cool shapes and genders in his paintings. @sanctus-ingenium 's stories and art have been a huge inspiration lately. And to list a few others now that I started: @pangur-and-grim/@greer-art, @beidak-art, @elemei, @emilylorange, @pansylair, @cy-lindric, @psrj, @lokorum

And many others I'm probably forgetting now! I also have a side blog @sancta-cessatrix where I occasionally reblog cool art, check tags #art #inspiration

[basketballanonsblog]

Posting this 3 days early because who cares about the schedule right? 🫠

Jeongyeon x Reader: soulmate AU

A sprinkle of Motzu at the beginning

Synopsis: You're slowly learning to love life again

Reason to love

"Tzuyu, relax. I'm sure Momo will love whatever you'll do for valentines day."

The youngest of the group sought out advice, going on a tangent about different ideas. She stopped pacing around and took a deep breath.

"You're right. What are your plans for y/n tomorrow?"

"Nothing extravagant, just a surprise picnic."

"Y/n unnie will love it nonetheless."

The maknae's words made Jeongyeon feel better than she'd like to admit.

-x-

You stretched your arms before opening your eyes. Looking left, your heart skipped a beat at the sight of the love of your life.

It was extraordinary. No matter how many tales you heard about what it's like to find your soulmate, it paled in comparison to the actual feeling.

You wouldn't complain if Jeongyeon was the only person you could look at for the rest of your life.

Seeing her barefaced and serene, you silently vowed to do everything in your power to protect her.

"I can feel you staring." She said without opening her eyes. You became bashful, leaning down to press kisses to her cheek until she squealed.

"How can I not stare? You're so beautiful."

"Even if I just woke up?"

"Yes."

"I'll only believe you if you kiss me."

You didn't hesitate to obey, and you felt her arms encircle your shoulders. For all you knew, an hour could've passed. But unfortunately, the real world was calling.

"I wish I could stay in bed with you, but I have to go to the office."

That was the first Jeongyeon was hearing of this.

"I thought you were free today?"

"Why?" She realised you were unaware it was valentines day.

"Nothing. Have fun at work." Was she disappointed? Definitely, but she understood that your job was important.

-x-

You chewed on the end of your pen whilst looking out of the window. The shift in Jeongyeon's demeanour bothered you.

Have you forgotten something? Your two month anniversary was all you could think of, but that was still over a week away.

Mina will know, you decided. Popping your head out the door you called to your friend.

"Mina! What's special about today?"

She was taken aback by your abruptness but recovered swiftly.

"Um...valentines day? Chaeyoung is taking me out to dinner tonight."

Oh.

"Thank you."

You practically slammed the door, and Mina laughed when you exclaimed "y/n you idiot!"

-x-

Jeongyeon walked towards your office with the picnic basket. She almost abandoned the idea since you were clueless about today's date. However, you sent her a text asking her to stop by because you've cleared out most of your afternoon schedules.

"Y/n didn't mean to forget." Mina said after they greeted each other.

"She's never celebrated valentines day before." Now that, Jeongyeon didn't know, making her frown.

"But, y/n is 219 years old."

"Yes. She detested the idea of celebrating many things alone, such as her birthday and valentines day. Over time, they became like any other day."

She was saddened to hear that. Anyone who loves as deeply as you do doesn't deserve to bear the weight of loneliness.

"Don't let me keep you. It's just her in there, so you can walk straight in." Mina snapped Jeongyeon out of her thoughts.

You were sitting on your desk when she entered, and you held her close once she was within reach.

"I'm sorry, my love. I'm still getting used to the fact that I finally found the person I can share my life with."

You rested your head against her chest. "Please be patient with me."

"Of course, baby." She combed her fingers through your hair while you basked in the comfort she exuded.

"I hope you don't mind, we have a visitor for lunch."

"Who?"

You stood upright, motioning for Jeongyeon to face the door.

"3, 2, 1..."

A little girl ran into the office, laughing.

"Hi Miss y/n!" She leapt into your chair, spinning around.

"Hey Eun-ji." She spun around for a couple of times before realising Jeongyeon was there too. Her eyes narrowed in curiosity causing Jeongyeon to waver slightly at her gaze.

Since when are children this intimidating?

"Hello, I'm -" She attempted to break the ice.

"You're Miss y/n's angel!"

Her what?

"Eh?"

Eun-ji picked up the photo of Jeongyeon you kept on your desk.

"I saw this, and Miss y/n said you're her angel."

"Did she now?" She smirked at you, making your ears turn red. You sheepishly rubbed your nape and cleared your throat.

"Lunch! Let's go, I'm hungry." You let Eun-ji jump on your back while you grabbed the picnic basket; avoiding eye contact with your girlfriend.

-x-

Jeongyeon slipped her hand in yours while the pair of you watched Eun-ji play in the park, the food long gone.

She knew you received your fair share of demons over the years, but she admired how you tried your best not to let them consume you.

"How did you meet her?"

"I shouldn't say too much, but something terrible happened to her, and I'm the prosecutor for this case. Trials can be hard enough to begin with, but it gets a whole lot more complicated when you add a child. It's my responsibility to make sure she's prepared, and despite being professional, she's somehow grown attached to me."

"Like you can't say the same." She teased.

"Perhaps." A hint of a smile appeared.

"It's understandable. I feel calm when I'm with you, and I'm guessing it's the same for her. No matter how aloof you try to act, there's just something inherently... warm about you."

The little girl reappeared, urging you to accompany her. You didn't resist as she pulled you to the playground.

Affection swelled within Jeongyeon as she watched Eun-ji, and you run around.

"There are those butterflies in my stomach again." She whispered to herself.

And if for a moment she imagined a future of you running around with a little one of your own, then she'd never tell.

Eun-ji joined her eventually, resting against her on the bench.

"Are you tired now?"

"A tiny bit, but I'm having fun with you and Miss y/n!" She tucked her hair behind the girl's ear and gave her a bottle of water.

"Jagiya!" You called out, catching both of their attention. "Watch this!"

You jumped, grabbing the monkey bars, before flipping your body around, making you hang upside down.

"Y/n unnie is silly." Eun-ji giggled at your antics.

"She is, isn't she? Stay here for a minute, sweetheart. " Jeongyeon made her way to you, bringing a smile to your face.

"Is Eun-ji okay?" The pair of you looked at the girl, who waved back.

"Yeah, she's just tired." Your girlfriend couldn't take you seriously as you were upside down.

"You know, it's hard to believe you're over two hundred years old when you're being playful like this."

"Be honest, honey, you love it." Her expression softened, and she couldn't resist leaning up slightly to kiss you.

"I do."

God...you'd never get tired of her kisses.

"You always make me feel lightheaded, my love."

"That's not me, silly. It's just the blood rushing to your head."

"I'll only get down for another kiss." You stuck your lips out, making Jeongyeon laugh.

"No chance!" She walked back to Eun-ji, leaving you upside down and pouting.

-x-

The sun was setting, and the little girl was asleep against your shoulder as you carried her. You looked to your girlfriend, whose hand was intertwined with yours.

It all felt a bit domestic, to be honest, but you didn't mind one bit.

"Jeongyeon, I'm sorry." You blurted out, causing her to face you so quickly, but you froze for a second, feeling nervous.

"What for honey?"

"I know this wasn't how you envisioned spending our first valentines day together. I'm trying my hardest to be better, to learn that I shouldn't constantly shut people out. Especially you. Jeongyeon, you have turned my world upside down, and I love you so much for that. Because of you, I'm beginning to find joy and love in the things I've ignored for so long. You're my reason to live, and I want to share every facet of my life with you."

Tears pricked the corner of her eyes during your mini heartfelt speech.

"Oh honey, I never doubted you. I see that you're trying your best, and I appreciate it more than you can imagine. You're right. This isn't how I imagined the day would go. But honestly? I wouldn't change a single thing about it."

"Really? So you were still... happy today?"

Jeongyeon stepped closer to you, being careful not to awake the girl before kissing your forehead.

"The happiest."

[antianakin]

I find it really interesting that you don’t like kallus at all bc say what you will about fulcrum or kalluzeb but he’s the first ex-/imperial character that we saw on screen who wasn’t already defected when we met him. Like obvs you’ve got Han and Sabine who started off in the academy and then left bc they realised in wasn’t what they wanted and tala who’s already a mole for the path by the time she’s on screen but most other characters we interact with regularly and significantly either stay imperial or have never been one as far as we know. And I think that watching kallus’ arc play out as he realises that no the empire isn’t worth it actually and it is worse and the rebels he’s fighting and trying to capture are better and are the good guys is just so fascinating to watch. If anakin’s arc in tcw and the prequels is about him getting worse and worse and making all the wrong choices again and again then kallus’s overarching storyline is about learning that actually his choices were wrong and he is the villain and he needs to accept that and try to do better as best he can. Ymmv on how well it was executed (and I do think there are parts that could have been done so much better) but the bare bones are there (and also I do love the interactions he has with kanan and Ezra post defection pre extraction where they’re like “this guy 😤” and are doing things like throwing him through glass screens to cover for him bc hey! They’re helping and they get to be a bit petty about it bc they still don’t like him and he just. Has to put up with it bc he’s on their side now and they are technically helping him)

I don’t know I just think it’s a pretty interesting arc to follow and I do think that however clumsily handled (again ymmv on how clumsily), the idea in his character of “it’s not too late to change and to choose to do better, you can unlearn your prejudice and biases and you can always start trying to do good no matter who you are” is a really important message that feels like Star Wars yk

(Side note: I just wanted to add that I love the anakin salt and the pro Jedi posts. I always pop around your blog when I’ve seen a few too many “he’s misunderstood” takes for my own good and it’s really cathartic to see someone else point out he sucks in new ways I hadn’t yet considered. I also find your Ahsoka takes super interesting bc most other things I see either just straight up do not like her or think she’s perfect where I always fell in the middle of “she’s interesting and narratively seems to be there to point out how anakin could have been if he’d made different choices since their flaws are so similar” ❤️❤️❤️)

This probably should have been split into two asks but I’ve written it all out now and my break is over so I guess it’s going to be one

Hi! I'm glad my blog helps provide you an area to just feel a little bitter sometimes when fandom gets hard, that's exactly why I made it for myself, just an escape when I'm starting to forget why I like this stuff sometimes and I just need to get rid of some of the bitterness.

I'm not against the IDEA of an Imperial character who turns against the Empire, of watching an Imperial character start to learn better and change sides. I promise I'm not!

I just think it shouldn't have been Kallus. I don't personally believe that they had a redemption arc in mind for Kallus when they were writing him in the first season at all. I don't know when the idea first got brought up for the writers, but it doesn't really seem to be one they had in mind in early season 2, either, so it just comes out of NOWHERE in that episode with Zeb where they get stuck in the ice. And the side effect of this lack of set up means that they really were writing Kallus as an irredeemable villain. He led a genocide against Zeb's people, he laughs at Zeb about being a survivor, he uses one of the Lasat's weapons as a trophy he took from that genocide. He turns against one of his own fellow officers at the end of season 1/beginning of season 2 when Tarkin and Vader show up and want someone to answer for their failure on Lothal. He helps lead Tua to her death and SMILES about the whole thing. Tua's death could've been a way to begin that journey, give him a crack in the wall where he feels doubt about what they're doing, but it DOESN'T, it just makes him MORE of a fanatic.

So when you get to that episode with Zeb in the ice, all of the sudden you have to take Kallus at his word that he DIDN'T lead the genocide he's already been saying he led, that he DIDN'T steal the Lasat weapon he already said he stole, that he totally had a sorta sympathetic reason for wanting an entire group of people eliminated from the galaxy, and that he apparently cares about having friends in the Empire. This isn't just a retcon of his backstory, it's a retcon of his CHARACTER. And they have to "all lives matter" the entire situation to do it by having him point out that Zeb judges all Imperials the same (and sees them all as enemies) which is somehow equivalent to Kallus judging an entire SPECIES for the actions of ONE PERSON and choosing to go genocide the entire species as a result. That's not just clumsy, that's OFFENSIVE. This is one of the WORST written episodes of Star Wars I have ever seen, which is saying something since I've seen the Ahsoka show and the Book of Boba Fett and The Mandalorian Season 3.

I think my major issue with Kallus's "arc", beyond the offensiveness of the retcon of his entire character, is that it isn't really an arc at all. It's ONE episode. The next time we even SEE Kallus, he's already willing to help Sabine escape from the Empire and then season 3 goes on to basically tell us he's been acting as a spy most of the season now. We DON'T actually get to see that arc for Kallus, he spends a few hours in the ice with Zeb and that's all it takes to turn him against the Empire really. The few times he shows up in-between don't do a lot to really emphasize a JOURNEY he's going on, he's just already on the side of the rebels and trying to push back against the Empire. And he fucking SUCKS at it, too. They have to come rescue his ass TWICE because he wasn't good enough at being a spy to not get caught and then he has the fucking GALL to think he's thrown off Thrawn and refuses to run when Kanan and Ezra risk their necks to save him which is what directly leads to Chopper Base being discovered. So not only is his redemption "arc" barely there anyway, he's an awful rebel and an awful spy.

This is why I keep arguing that it should've been PRYCE to be the Imperial defector. She isn't introduced to the story until season 3, and so her character is basically a big blank slate. They'd MENTIONED her, but all we knew is that she was the governor of the planet or something and she was gone on Coruscant dealing with stuff. This and the fact that she has an ACTUAL connection to Lothal by being FROM THE PLANET gives her a really really excellent pathway towards turning on the Empire. Maybe she sided with the Empire because she genuinely believed it would help save them from what everyone else suffered by fighting back. Maybe she was promised certain advantages if she sided with the Empire that they could show haven't been kept. Let her CARE about Lothal and its people just enough for her to have a REASON to turn against the Empire and see its truth.

It's one of the other reasons I don't like using Kallus, he's not really emotionally connected to any character but Zeb. Turning Kallus does very little for the main characters Ezra and Kanan. If they were going to turn an Imperial character, which IS a fairly big thing to put into a narrative, I feel like it should've impacted the MAIN characters far more than it actually does. Let Ezra, the person whose story is being told here, be a part of the reason that Imperial character turns. Let that journey away from the Empire be something they're actively WORKING on rather than something that primarily happens off screen in Kallus's head.

I think the only reason they chose Kallus for this was because fans already liked him and they couldn't figure out what else to do with him at this point. He's a basically ineffective villain because he keeps having to lose and the only times he "wins" against the crew is when they LET him win by sacrificing themselves or something. And they were already starting to write him out as an antagonist by including Vader, Tarkin, the Inquisitors, and they might've known they were bringing in Thrawn in season 3 (and maybe that Pryce would finally show up) by the time that ice episode was being written. Kallus was becoming irrelevant, but fans enjoyed him so they had to figure out a way to make him relevant moving forward, and so, quick and dirty redemption "arc" so he can move to the rebel side. You'll notice he barely does anything in season 4, though, once he's moved to the rebellion he's just kinda... there. Irrelevant again because he's not actually good enough at anything to be worth having him DO anything important or interesting to the plot.

A LOT of people seem to think Kallus's "redemption" was really well done and I just can't agree. I think it would've been better to take Kallus a different direction, to really have him just succumb to being evil, to become even MORE of a fanatic for the Empire moving forward, and then just pick someone else to be the defected Imperial character. Or they should've had a redemption arc in mind for Kallus from the beginning. Using Tua's death to start the process of doubt in his mind, or having him be the one the Empire turns on would've both worked. They didn't give themselves enough time to really write him a good redemption arc where the reasons for why he turns on the Empire actually feel in character to what we've been told and shown of him so far.

I think if you just... start in season 3 and act like Kallus has HAD a true redemption arc already by season 3, then those scenes work. The humor of the Rebels crew starting to discover Kallus is on their side now and not entirely trusting that and wanting to punt him through a window IS funny! I, too, would like to throw Kallus through a window several times, even perhaps over a cliff or out an airlock. But those scenes come with the context of having seen the first two seasons and feeling the VERY abrupt 180 his character took without the show doing any of the actual work to make his defection seem realistic or reasonable. Season 3 is fine for Kallus, the scenes are funny, etc. But he wasn't actually redeemed yet and neither season 2 nor season 3 do the work to showcase that journey.

And I think that this is likely one of the reasons we DON'T see very many Imperial redemption stories and most of the Imperial defectors we see are already defected when we meet them. You can count Gorn and Taramyn from Andor in this category, as well. It's HARD to take a character who's been set up as violent, selfish, and cruel, and REALLY do the work necessary to turn them around into someone who would genuinely turn on the Empire and join the Rebellion. It's by no means impossible, but it takes a lot of work and a lot of focus on said character. Most of these shows and stories aren't willing to put in that kind of work because they're focusing on someone else who needs their story told instead, so it's easier to just... have someone who's already changed sides.

All of that being said, there IS a character who we've seen go through this arc that I think was done MILES better than Kallus.

Reva Sevander. An Inquisitor (possibly BY CHOICE unlike all of the others who were presumably captured and broken into it) working for the Empire, who DOES do violent and selfish stuff, but who ultimately leaves that behind by the end of the season. Reva, who obviously was written with that turn in mind, and so her tragedy is BAKED into her character from the moment the show begins (we literally start the ENTIRE SHOW with a flashback of Reva at the Temple when Order 66 starts, and the terror of that night). The twist in her character, that she's doing all of this as a way to get closer to Anakin so she can kill him as vengeance for the Jedi, doesn't feel like it comes out of nowhere. It's just always been there FROM THE BEGINNING. Making her an Inquisitor, something Jedi: Fallen Order and some comic books have fleshed out into people who weren't given much choice in becoming monsters, was an expert choice. Using her to parallel and foil Anakin, someone whose primary storyline is that he was a GOOD person who turned bad and still had good in him, also helps her out.

I'd argue Reva hasn't gone on a full "redemption arc" as yet, she's sort-of barely scratched the surface of it, but she does obviously make the choice to STOP going down the path she's on, to turn away from her anger and vengeance, and leaves behind being an Inquisitor and the darkness she'd succumbed to. The reasons for why she does the things she does MAKE SENSE, they're narratively relevant, they're important to the main character of the story she's in, and the writers didn't wait too long to tell us more about her and her motivations. It's expertly done in my opinion.

So while Kallus might have been the first Imperial defector to show up in mainstream Star Wars, he is not the ONLY Imperial character we have seen to turn against the Empire. And yet Kallus gets praise and accolades for being such a great character with such a great character arc, while Reva got panned and critiqued for being unlikable. I wonder what could be the reason behind that.

So I think you and I have fairly similar feelings on this in that the IDEA of a redeemed Imperial character whose journey towards turning on the Empire is actually shown is a GOOD story to tell (with a very Star Wars style message, as you say), but that the way it was done with Kallus was REALLY badly written. You seem to be leaning towards liking the concept enough that the clumsiness of it is outweighed, whereas I hate the clumsy way it was written so much that my positive feelings towards the concept are outweighed.

And I deserve a good Reva show where we get to follow more of her character post-OWK where she still has to work on herself and figure out who she is now that she's left the darkness behind. Finish the arc she's only just started on.

[my-deer-friend]

I’ve read something interesting about Martha Laurens (John’s sister) that once she had a really mean teacher throw away her doll by the window and she cried every time someone mentioned the teacher’s name, and her response being asked why she cried she would answer that because of Nelly's death.

I come across with this in the book “Memories of Martha Laurens Ramsay” by David Ramsay, but in one version, in the others I do not saw any record like this, can you help with advice how to use historical sources like this, because there are two versions and I do not know how to interpret this. 

this is the second edition^

this is the first one^

This is such a great question, and it really goes to the heart of what makes historical research both fun and frustrating.

When working with written historical sources, we must put aside the idea that we can ever find "the truth". Not only do people lie, but they also forget, misremember, have imperfect information, misunderstand, and so on. But that doesn't mean that the written sources are necessarily wrong. Here's how I'd go about thinking over this case.

1. Evaluate the quality of the source

By "quality" here I mean the historical accuracy or truthfulness, though there are other lenses you could use in different contexts. I first want to know how reliable and accurate in general the source is.

What? This text is a biography, published publicly, by the husband of the subject.

Who? David Ramsay was Martha's husband. That both means he had privileged access to her life story and documents and that he had reason to put a positive spin on her character and actions.

When? The book was published posthumously, but fairly soon after Martha's death. But that means there was no chance to fact-check the text with her, and even three years after someone's death is a lot of time for memories to get muddled and changed. So we can say the narrative is evidence of what Ramsay remembered (and decided to include) rather than what Martha actually experienced.

Why? The goal in publishing this work seems to be a heartfelt attempt to memorialise the life and religious views of a beloved spouse.

Overall, I think we can say the book is a reasonably factually accurate but highly selective source on Martha's life, highlighting her positive traits and leaving out large swaths of her story. For this part in particular, I can see no reason why Ramsay would have made it up himself; it's a trivial detail and doesn't add much to his agenda.

2. Cross-reference with other sources

The next thing we can do, having judged the source to be not-super-accurate, would be to find other (hopefully more sturdy) sources to cross reference. I highly doubt that anything like this still exists, but it's always great when you can find two completely unrelated people saying the same thing.

3. Interpret the reason for the change

The core of your question, if I can restate it, is "why is the story included in the first edition, and not the second?". This is different to asking whether the story is true (which is something we can never know). There are several reasons that occur to me off the top of my head for why the text would be edited between editions:

Ramsay realised the section was inaccurate and asked for it to be cut

Ramsay wanted the section removed for some personal reason (it was a painful memory, it was a private moment, he realised it was embarrassing or created a bad impression of his wife)

The publisher asked for that story specifically to be cut for some reason

The publisher reqested the text to be shortened and that's the part Ramsay decided to remove

Ramsay revised the book for the second edition and removed it for editorial reasons – maybe it broke the flow, or seemed too trivial, even if it was "true"

To find out what happened, you could look around to see if David Ramsay wrote any letters about this (e.g. to the publisher or to someone in Martha's family), or even just check the foreword to the second edition to see if there are clues about why parts were changed.

4. Decide how to use the information

Having done all that, we're left to decide how to proceed, which depends on what we need to do with this info. The first step is to define the assumptions we have made.

My assumptions (and yours could differ) are: it's quite possible the anecdote is based on something Ramsay remembers Martha saying, and therefore might be true, or at least true to the family mythos (as one of those stories passed on from one person to the next). There's no other evidence either way, and the story doesn't really matter in the grand scheme of Martha's life, except to show a possible character trait that I can probably get better corroboration on elsewhere.

If I was writing a biography of Martha, and I felt that I had to include this story, I would explain what Ramsay wrote int he context of the deliberations above (much more briefly) so that the reader could judge for themself.

[antiqua-lugar]

actually I think the weirdest thing about blackwall's ordeal is that suddenly what happened It's A Big Thing

Like forget DA:O and DA2 where everyone was committing murder for fun and profit, the narrative is that Rainer is terrible for 1) caring about power and profit 2) not calling off an attack when he realised children would die 3) telling his men they were doing it for their country and then instead they got hanged for it which he had no idea it would happen (but also weren't they a mercenary group) But like 1) everyone in Orlais cares about power and profit because that's literally how Orlais works 2) children die all the time in this game and no one cares SIMPLY BECAUSE THEY DON'T SHOW IT 3) the only reason why his men get labelled as traitors is that Gaspard publically denounces the attack he asked for to get good PR

Like I'm not saying Blackwall did nothing wrong, but like the main reason why the whole thing is made a big deal of in the game is that Blackwall feels terrible about it. Cullen has like zero regrets about all the sexual assault and murder (also of children) he condoned/was about to condone in DA2, so no one gives him shit about it. Dorian shrugs his shoulders about slavery, so he is fine. Vivienne doesn't say anything about playing The Game, so she's also fine. Everyone at the Winter's Palace stays suspiciously silent about anything Celene or Gaspard did, so the Inquisitor has zero context for anything. Leliana and Cassandra had zero qualms supporting Justinia who wanted an Exalted March and they keep talking about what a great woman she was actually and how much they miss her. Rainier however does take responsibility so everyone makes a big show of pointing fingers at him and ask for his head on a plate.

[thatphantomtroupelady]

Random HCs for some phantom troupe member~ (Part 1)

Part 2

Pakunoda would be the best person to go shopping with. She'd know all the secretly awesome (thrift or not) stores and aisles; and would be a queen at bargaining. The only downside is idk why but I feel like she'd absent-mindedly let you take all the shopping bags, until she'd realise you're actually drowning in them. But then she'd get super apologetic and offer to carry them all. (Ofc you should say no bc how could you deny being in service to a queen???)

Machi would be weirdly good at talking with her eyes. One look for the tiniest fraction of a second and you'd know what she wants to say. On the flip side, the ice queen would be scarily good at hiding her emotions via her eyes. You'd be super used to just looking into them whenever you'd be confused about her emotions. And then just one day you'd get into an argument or smt and try to read her and just nothing. Nothing.

Phinks would be the biggest hit or miss cook. He would be the absolute best cook when it comes to dishes he can cook. But the dishes he can't... well... Let's just hope he doesn't burn the kitchen down.

Kortopi would completely shower you with gifts. Plus he'd take note of every little thing you'd even just off-handedly mention liking. Like you'd look at a dress a bit too long while walking past a store and next day you wake up and boom it's in your closet. Of course, he'd steal it and leave a copy behind for a bit~ He would also be a nervous wreck. Every. Single. Time. You'd have to reassure him over and over again that you do actually love it. And he would still go and quietly ask the other members whether they think you're lying or not. It's more about him being insecure than anything. altho I feel like it would mostly wear off over time.

We already know how Shizuku is the queen of forgetfulness. But I also feel like she'd be the queen of hyperfixation. She'd start reading a book and forget to do anything else before the book has been finished. Bonus points if she's focusing on you. She'd start talking/spending time with you and suddenly she'd forget everything else. Eating? What's that? Sleeping? Ehh. The other troupe members? Huh??