#1. people take “coffees” to mean different amounts

[athanza]

Safe and Sound (part 2/2)

Pro hero Ktsuki Bakugou x fem! Pro hero OC

Plot: After being too scared to tell Saiyu how he feels about her, he sees her losing a solo fight against a villain and rushes desperately to get to her before it's too late.

Tags: Hurt/comfort, sfw, romance, time skip/age up, confession, protectiveness, hair-washing, fluff, no use of y/n, happy ending.

Warnings: Mention of having anxiety, minor flashbacks to the fight from part one, but this part is mostly fluff and comfort ♡

Disclaimer: This is kind of a placeholder oc, not a self-insert. You can put whoever you like in place of her, I just don't like y/n fics 😅 I hope you enjoy ♡

Song inspo ♡

Part 1

It wasn't long before Saiyu had a visit from the doctor. She wasn't feeling so weak anymore thanks to Bakugou making her eat but she still ached all over.

"Good news!" The doctor smiled. "You've recovered better than expected so I've decided to discharge you today."

"Oh thank god" she thought. She was hoping she'd be able to leave the hospital soon, not just because she hated it there but also for Bakugou's sake, he'd been sleeping in that awful chair for days and she felt so bad about it.

"But you will need some kind of supervision for the next day or two to make sure you stay home and on top of your medications." The doctor added. "I recommend taking another week or so off work, at least until the bruising subsides. Then try to take it easy for another few days, at least."

"She'll be staying with me." Said Bakugou, without hesitation.

She looked up, surprised. "Are you serious? You can't take any more time off work, it's already been three days."

"Know anyone else who can cook as good as me?" He gloated. "Tssh, I didn't think so."

"I-" She was going to protest again but she stopped, knowing it was no good. No one was more stubborn than Katsuki Bakugou.

"Then that settles it! I've already sorted your discharge papers. You're free to go." The doctor smiled and left as promptly as he arrived.

"Why is he doing this?" She thought. "He's never been this serious about taking care of anyone before. I mean, I guess I did almost die, and he is one of my best friends."

"Alright dumbass," he said. "You're gonna get better so damn fast you'll forget all about that fight."

When they arrived at Bakugou's apartment she smiled at him panicking at the small amount of mess that was strewn across the living room.

"S-sorry about the mess." He said, his face a little red. "I've been so busy I haven't had time to clean anything up."

It was then that she noticed the full jug of coffee, the news channel still on the TV, and the open window. She put the pieces together and felt a swell in her chest.

"He must have left so quickly when he saw my fight on the news." She thought. "Katsuki..."

"It's not even that bad, don't worry about it." She chuckled. "You know I don't care."

"Yeah but you're here to get better, not be surrounded by mess. Oh by the way, you can take the bed, I'll sleep on the couch."

"Absolutely not!" She protested. He looked surprised at her tone. "You've been sleeping in a shitty chair for 3 days! I'm not kicking you out of your own bed!"

"Who's the one who's injured huh!?" He argued back.

"Bite me, sparkler!"

There was a short pause there for a moment before Bakugou burst out laughing.

"S-sparkler?" He said, wiping a tear from his eye from the laughter.

She was surprised that he didn't argue back and get pissed like he usually did when people called him names. She couldn't even remember the last time she made him laugh like that.

"It just came to me." She chuckled.

"Don't let Eijiro hear that one, he'll never stop calling me that."

"What if I texted him right now?"

"You wouldn't dare." He grinned, almost daring her to.

"Wouldn't I?"

He chuckled "Nah, knowing you, you'll wait for the right moment and take him out with it. You know he'd keel over laughing. If you do I'll kill you though."

Something was different about how he was talking to her. His playful insults were the same, but the tone was completely different. He wasn't as brusque as usual, and it puzzled her. Was he really that effected by the events of the other day?

The laughter settled by now and he quickly finished tidying up the lounge area so she could sit down.

"Izuku dropped off some groceries while we were in the hospital, I hope you still like miso."

She sat down on the couch and hugged one of the pillows, watching him start preparing dinner while a feeling of such warm affection filled her chest that she couldn't help smiling.

She knew she had feelings for him for years, but she ignored it. At first, it was because they were in third year and were so swamped with assignments and training that there was just no room for any of that, so she basically just shut those feelings out. The problem was that those feelings stayed locked away ever since, being happy just to be his friend, to have his back in fights and be there for him when he needed a friend. But everything was different now. Now she couldn't hold them back.

"Hey, you like shitakke mushrooms don't y-" Bakugou turned around to see her adoring expression and froze.

"Crap!" She thought.

She immediately snapped out of it and turned away, hoping he didn't clock it. But he did.

"C-can I use your shower?" She asked, getting up and changing the subject to try and move on. "I haven't had one since I was admitted at the hospital."

"Uh, y-yeah."

"Thanks."

She left the room quickly. Face bright red and trying to hide it.

She grabbed a clean towel from the closet in the hallway and locked herself in the bathroom. She'd used his shower a few times before when she'd had jobs on the same side of town and it was closer than her own place. Bakugou even gave her a spare key in case he wasn't there, but it felt kind of weird now that these feelings had been dragged to the surface again. She hadn't felt this way since second year of UA.

"Pull yourself together, oh my god." She blushed.

She hung up the towel and placed the bath mat in front of the shower as she turned on the water. But when she spotted her new scars in the mirror above the sink, she stopped. Her mind flooded with flashbacks of the fight and her heart started racing.

"It's ok." She said quietly to herself as she took deep breaths and held her hand over her chest. "It's over. You're fine."

She was no stranger to anxiety. Luckily, she never had panic attacks anymore, but some fights took a lot out of her, and she still had bad days. She kept up the deep breaths as she undressed and got in the shower. The warm water on her back calmed her almost instantly, it always did, she didn't know why.

She began to wash herself, scrubbing off the dirt and the sticky bits left over from being hooked up to machines at the hospital, but when she reached up to get the shampoo there was a sharp pain in her leg and she collaped. She yelped in pain and that paired with the thud from her good knee hitting the floor of the shower alerted Bakugou who was still cooking. He rushed to the door.

"Are you ok!?" He asked.

She sat there for a moment, adjusting herself so she wasn't on her knee. "I-I'm fine." She said.

But when she tried to get back up her leg just hurt even more and refused to work. The doctor told her this might happen for the first few days after treatment but she felt fine until now.

"Are you sure?"

She sat there, feeling helpless and defeated, and she just started crying. "No." She whimpered, feeling even worse about herself now that she was in such an embarrassing situation, but she couldn't stand on her own.

Bakugou paused. She needed help but, should he go in there? Should he call Ochaco or one of the other girls to come help? He didn't know what to do.

"G-give me a minute." She said, crawling forward as best as she could and grabbing the towel from the outside handle of the shower door. The towel was big enough to cover everything just fine but she was still embarrassed.

"Bakugou?" She said, her voice shaky and slightly muffled from behind the bathroom door as Bakugou stood there, still frozen. "I need help."

Hearing the quiver in her voice set him into action mode, he set off a tiny explosion in the lock and opened the door to see her sitting on the floor of the shower, covered in a wet towel, her scars somehow looking worse.

He felt so bad for her, she looked utterly defeated and his heart hurt seeing her like that.

He walked over and turned the water off and held out his hand. "Do you think you can stand on your own on your good leg?" He said softly.

She nodded.

"Let's get you up. I'll get you a bigger towel."

He helped her to her feet and quickly fetched another towel from the closet. He handed it to her and turned around so she could replace the dripping wet one. Once she was covered up, he helped her sit down on the edge of the bathtub and took out the shampoo and conditioner.

"What are you doing?" She sniffed, still feeling utterly embarrassed.

"Let's get your hair washed at least." He said, fetching a small plastic bowl from under the sink for water. "Is your leg ok?"

She nodded and watched him get everything together and how he wasn't looking at her with anything other than care and respect. There wasn't even the slightest glance at her chest or anything. He just wanted to take care of her and it made her tear up.

Her hair was already wet so he put some shampoo in it and started massaging it through as she just stared at the floor, glad that the water was disguising her tears. She never felt like this before. She felt so cared for, she didn't even really know how to react. She'd never been more greatful to have him in her life than she had in the last three days.

He filled the bowl with warm water and got her to lean over the bath a bit so he could rinse the shampoo out. She covered her eyes until it was over and he dried her hair a little before he put in the conditioner.

She just sat there and let him finish washing her hair, wishing the last few days had gone differently, wishing that villain didn't show up, wishing she didn't get injured so badly, wishing...

She closed her eyes again and just focused on his fingers in her hair, the care he was showing her. It warmed her heart and began to silence those negative feelings and thoughts to just muffled gibberish, although that didn't quite get rid of them completely.

He rinsed her hair again and put a towel over her head, drying her hair gently.

"Now, let me have a look at your leg."

He examined it carefully, never once looking anywhere other than where he needed to, before determining that it was ok and the collapse was just a side effect from the treatment, as the doctor said would happen.

"Thank you." She said quietly. The quiver in her voice giving her away again.

"Hey, don't worry about it." His voice was warm and gentle in a way she had never heard before. "I've been where you are, I know how helpless it makes you feel. The best thing you can do is let people take care of you, and I know that's hard for people like us who hate needing help, but sometimes you just gotta let yourself lean on someone."

Her eyes stayed on the floor, but she leaned forward and leant her head on his shoulder.

"I'll try." She said.

He smiled. "That's all I ask."

Once he knew she was ok, he left the bathroom to continue cooking dinner and she cleaned the rest of herself with a face towel while staying on the edge of the bathtub. Once she was dry, she managed to change into come clean clothes Bakugou had fetched her and he helped her out of the bathroom to the small dining table where dinner was ready and waiting. Her stomach grumbled when she saw it. A good soup was just what she needed, and he made the best ones, especially miso soup with mushrooms and soba noodles.

"Wow!" She said, looking at not only the big steaming bowl of soup but also all the yummy sides he'd put together as well.

"And you said you weren't hungry earlier." He teased smugly.

"That was hours ago and it wasn't your famous miso soup."

Her eyes sparkled as she eagerly eyed the food and he smiled to himself.

"Well hurry up and eat it before it gets cold...dumbass."

He hesitated the last bit and felt a little bad for saying it after how upset she was earlier. Little did he know she actually found it strangely comforting, which, in all honesty, would be concerning if he was literally anyone else, but he called everyone dumbass, and this time it was much more affectionate than before.

The food wasn't on the table for long before it was all gone. Both were so hungry and exhausted, a good meal was all they needed after the events of the last few days.

Bakugou, of course, refused any and all attempts at helping with the dishes, and she eventually gave up and sank into the couch. She switched on the TV and clicked through the channels until she came across a re-run of her fight with that villain, and Bakugou's heroic rescue.

"Hey," he said. "Turn that crap off, you don't need that right now."

"I need to see it." She said. "I need to see if I missed something."

He stopped what he was doing and dried his hands, walking over and unplugging the TV before kneeling in front of her.

"You didn't miss anything Saiyu." He said, so earnestly it snapped her out of the spiral she had begun to slide back into. "You did everything right. You assessed the situation, you had the area evacuated, you figured out his quirk, you realised your quirks were a bad match, and you held him off until I got there, which was all you could do, you know that."

"Was it?" She asked, teary eyed again.

He pulled her into a hug, holding her tightly. "I promise it was. You're an amazing hero Saiyu. You're smart and you're strong. I've always admired you, ever since our fight during our final exams. And I-" he paused, feeling that pain in his chest as he tried not to cry. "I hate seeing you like this. I think you're amazing, I always have. You should be so proud of yourself Saiyu, for everything."

Tears broke free from both their eyes and she hugged him back, clinging to him as if he'd disappear if she let go.

"Katsuki." She cried softly. "I couldn't have achieved half the things I have without you. You've helped me through every tough time I've ever had, and I appreciate that so much, but you were right about what you said before, I don't like needing help, from anyone. But..." She swallowed back the lump in her throat. "But there's nowhere I'd rather be right now. Nowhere. You mean so much to me."

The city lights washed them in a soft glow and Bakugou squeezed his eyes shut as he held her. He didn't want to let go any more than she did.

"You mean more to me than you could ever imagine. And I'll always be there for you. Even if I'm dying I'll come to you, no matter where you are." He pulled away and placed a hand on her cheek. "I promise."

"Katsuki..."

He leaned in a little, and she filled the rest of the space between them, pressing her warm lips to his and wrapping her arms around his neck.

"I love you." She said when they pulled away.

Another tear fell from his eye. "I love you too."

They fell asleep in each other's arms and went on to become the best hero team in Japan, always having each other's backs, no matter what.

THE END

Thank you so much for reading! I absolutely loved writing this one and I hope it helps anyone out there who's feeling helpless, sad, or uncared for. You all deserve as much love and care as Bakugou showed Saiyu and I'm sending you all lots of love ♡

If you enjoyed this, please like and share and if it made you feel even a little bit better, leave a comment below, I'd love to hear it ♡

Love you all! ♡

[coffee-and-guitar-strings]

Studying with ADHD

Dear God. My activity on here is sporadic, as is fitting with my diagnosis, but I thought maybe this post could help anyone that's been struggling alongside me.

Warning: Long Post

Feel Free to browse the bullet points and stop if something catches your eye!

If you don't like any of these, don't use them! They're based solely off my experience, and everyone experiences ADHD differently <3

Content:

Setting up The Space

Study Snacks!! - No hunger in The Space

Compete with yourself

Ignore Pomodoro

Reverse the feeling of 'not being smart enough'

Active Recall

Unriddle.ai (not sponsored,,,)

Final Tip

Final Note

Here ya go:

1. Setting up The Space

Some sites say to create a 'distraction free zone' to study in. Screw that, it never worked for me.

My brain is the distraction. I'll stare off into space if there's no other option.

INSTEAD:

We set up a study space that both fulfils random urges mid-work session, and limits distractions away from the desk.

I.e. we don't get up until we need the bathroom.

You limit the amount you get up from The Space, you limit the number of things your attention span will switch to.

Snacks, fidgets, drawing, separate screen for watching stuff? Whatever works, stick it on the desk.

Food wise, I try to make a healthy lunch and then eat it at my desk while reviewing stuff, but sometimes I need a longer break.

If I am taking a break, I do it away from The Space. The Space is dead to me now.

Try to compartmentalise your area, work only in these spots, relax only in these, sleep only there.

We're trying to train our brains here, people, simple and clear relations of space to activity typically get embedded easier.

Also: work whenever.

Burst of energy at 9pm? Go for it, we sleep badly anyways.

Middle of lunch? Have a flashcard/ notes app on your phone, do it while you eat.

With friends? See method 5 <3

I'll link a separate post I'll be making on exactly how my space is set up, though most of the key points are in this one :)

2. Study Snacks!! - No hunger in The Space

One. Handed. Food. Only.

Also, food that doesn't get stuff on your fingers.

You can't work if you're constantly wiping your hands to keep going, and you need something you can absentmindedly grab while you keep your eyes trained on the work.

I recommend getting artificial sugar in your system, sweets, chocolate, give yourself a mild sugar rush to keep a bit of a buzz going while you work.

(try to be healthy about it, this won't be sustainable long-term, but I find a shot of sugar to the system can help prevent burnout)

Also caffeine! Please be aware of how much caffeine you're having for health reasons - I need to watch how much I have, since my medication is already bad for my heart, but even just having a coffee and some sugar at the start of the session, I get enough energy to start working

As long as I don't stop until I'm Done, I will be good.

3. Compete with yourself

I don't recommend competing with others, it toes the line of 'feeling like a failure' too much for my liking, but if it works for you, go for it.

Instead, I compete with myself. Mostly quizlet flashcards, but also 'how much of this have I remembered from yesterday?', and 'How much more can I remember today?'

Whether it's personality or hyperactivity, this gives a dopamine hit. Finding ways to make studying something you can score against is one of my favourite methods.

Video games are an ADHD staple for a reason, easily trackable progress and dopamine from rewards/hyperfixations/etc. make them addictive.

Turn the work into a video game (I think at this point I may sound insane to you guys but please trust me)

4. Ignore Pomodoro

ADHD students, we have to think like sharks: we stop, we die.

Once you have found yourself studying with (relative) ease, Do. Not. Stop. You keep that going as long as possible.

ADHD doesn't mean you can't focus, you can, you just have no choice in where that attention gets allocated. So, when a tomato-based timer tell you to turn off your focus and relax, after it took you half the damn time to start the stupid work, it can be a little counter-productive

(I may have some repressed rage for pomodoro, try to forgive me)

Please, ignore the pomodoro stuff. I know it's healthy to regulate the volume of work you do, but I find that once I start working, I can't stop until I run out of energy.

I time or video myself instead, I can track how long I've been working, feel proud of it, and I also can't use my phone during that session.

When my brain stops taking stuff in, I have an hour to 2 hour break, relax (away from The Space) try to reset my brain so it's back to baseline. Then I start again.

5. Reverse the feeling of 'not being smart enough'

I know I am smart, and it's on others if they don't see that, but having undiagnosed ADHD for 17 years did a number on my self image and confidence.

If you struggle with this, it's so, so helpful to try this method, and can start to reverse the negative internal image we've managed to cultivate <3

So, after you've covered a topic: tell someone about it (please make sure they're ready to listen to you rant for half an hour).

Not only are you reinforcing what you've just learnt, but you also get to feel competent, and teaching someone else about your topic helps to raise perceptions (internal or from others) of what you know/what you're capable of.

6. Active Recall

This one goes great with the whole, 'competing with yourself' method (no. 4);

Active Recall is just making sure you're going over old information and recalling correctly, once it's past short term memory. Trying to remember information without it present forces your brain to pull it from Long-term memory and reinforces the information in your brain.

I know it's been said a million times, but this + competing with yourself does wonders for me.

My favourite method is blurting ( read/write notes of one topic, wait ten minutes, do something else productive, and then try to copy that topic from memory. repeat until all key info is correctly recalled)

7. Unriddle.ai (not sponsored,,,)

Okay, this site changed it for me. 5 free uploads, 15 free inputs per month.

Download a copy of the fancy scientific paper/article/book you need to read through. Upload.

Ask unriddle to summarise key points, to re-write it as if you were 7, etc.

This genuinely saved my essays. Suddenly the procrastination of reading my source material was gone. It makes it so much easier to get through dense/boring text and then I wrote everything myself.

Please do not plagiarise, I am only recommending this site to make things easier to read, copying down what it produces is considered plagiarism by my uni, and likely most others.

8. Final Tip

Be kind to yourself.

When I got medicated, my friends were genuinely stressed by how much work I was suddenly doing.

One of them asked me about it, and I realised it didn't feel like I was doing any more than normal. I had always been working this hard, it was just that half the energy going in wasn't being wasted on trying to get myself to focus.

What you put in may not receive the same results as for others, but the reality is that you're likely working harder than they are. The irritating truth is simply that we have to compensate for the different cognitive functioning that neurotypicals get to take for granted

(no hate to the NTs, I'm glad ya'll don't have to think about it, but for someone with ADHD, it can be really tough to realise)

A Final Note:

You are smart. You can do this. We just need to modify the system a little to make it work for us. There is no shame in that, anyone telling you otherwise needs a reality check.

Genuinely though, I've noticed that people telling me I use my ADHD accommodations (required by law) as a 'crutch'.

1. If the world were set up by me, that same person would struggle just as much, if not more.

2. If Rishi Sunak's government is willing to GIVE ME FREE MONEY to access these accommodations, that implies that this genuinely is needed. Not because I think Sunak is intelligent or kind (my own political opinions, please just hear me out), but because there is no way, with the underfunding of the NHS, Public services, etc. that they'd be willing to give me money I don't need to repay if it wasn't a scientific fact that I needed it, and it helped.

Use the inadequacies of the government to your advantage in arguments, make the idiots see how integral our accommodations are. I'd have dropped out of uni by now without them.

For anyone in need of help trying to convince family/friends/teachers/etc. of the struggle with ADHD (or anything else, though I won't have as much experience with it), telling them what you need help with, or any other arguments, send me an ask. I do psychology for my degree, I am used to searching for research papers, and I will help you with the necessary scientific backing for your case.

You are not in this alone <3

Lots of Love!

Coffee + Guitar Strings

@chocolatelandgarden @chaoticstudyprincess

[jrob64]

Ghosted

Chapter 1 - Hauntings

Here is the first chapter of my contribution for this year's Captain Swan Supernatural Summer. I have many people to thank for helping me get this written and posted by my assigned date.

Thank you to my fellow mods of CSSNS24 - @winterbaby89 @stahlop @ultraluckycatnd and @kmomof4. I'm so glad we've had such a great response to this last event!

More thanks to Krystal for creating the absolutely amazing pic set for this story. It turned out great, didn't it? Making Neal and Liam appear ghostly was the handiwork of @motherkatereloyshipper, so she also deserves my appreciation.

Rounding out my list of thank yous is my ever-loyal beta, @hookedmom. I've been writing CS stories for nearly six years and she's been with me for the vast majority of them!

I anticipate this story being 3-4 chapters long in total. It isn't completely written yet, so unfortunately I can't provide a posting schedule, but I assure you it WILL be finished. If you're not on my tag list and would like to be informed when future chapters post, please let me know.

DISCLAIMER: All I know about ghost hunting is what I've watched on Ghost Adventures (which is worth watching simply for the entertainment factor.) I also know next to nothing about how YouTube works beyond being a viewer. Please excuse all errors and keep in mind that this is fanfic and isn't meant to be completely accurate!

SUMMARY: When Emma Swan’s ex-boyfriend dies, she’s haunted by his ghost. Her neighbor, Killian Jones, a ghost hunter who has a YouTube channel, realizes what’s happening and offers to help. However, there’s more at stake than simply helping the apparition move on. There’s also the matter of Killian telling Emma he’s in love with her.

Rating: T (subject to change)

Words (Chapter 1): 4700

Also posted to ffn and Ao3

Juggling a large Americano and a blueberry scone, Emma Swan made a beeline across the coffee shop for the small table in the corner. Whenever she stopped in, she tried to sit there because it was beside the window and was only big enough for one chair. Even when the shop was crowded, no one could join her or bother her by asking if ‘this seat is taken’. She could be left alone, which was the way she preferred it in the mornings.

Taking a sip of the near-scalding beverage, she tilted her head back and closed her eyes, savoring the aromatic flavor on her tongue. She tried not to make a habit of coming to this shop, but her coffee maker died over the weekend and she needed her shot of caffeine.

She was nibbling on the corner of her scone when she felt her phone vibrate with an incoming text. Pulling it out of the back pocket of her jeans, she saw that it was from her friend Ruby. The partial message on the lock screen said I’ve got huge news. Are you sitting down?

Emma huffed out a sound of amusement as she unlocked her phone. Ruby’s ‘huge’ news was probably that Graham Humbert, who worked at the police station where Ruby was the dispatcher, had switched to a different scent of cologne. Instead, her eyes widened as she read the rest of the message:

They found Neal Cassidy dead in his cell this morning. Apparent suicide. Guess you won’t have to worry about him stalking you again when he gets out.

It took her a few moments to digest the information. For nearly two years, thoughts of that man had never been far from the forefront of her mind. The memories of their blossoming romantic relationship, which were replaced by her suspicions and ultimate confirmation of his criminal activities, raced through her brain as she stared at the message for an inordinate amount of time.

When she finally started typing a response to Ruby, a shadow fell across the table, blocking the late morning sun. It didn’t move for several moments, so she glanced up, meaning to find the source of it on the other side of the window.

And looked directly into the eyes of Neal Cassidy.

Shocked beyond words, she squeezed her eyes closed, then blinked repeatedly before she looked up again, her heart hammering in her chest.

He was gone.

*********

Emma met Neal at a car dealership where he worked as a salesman. She was looking to trade in her yellow VW bug for something more reliable and he was eager to help. He was charming and funny, so when he asked her out on a date after the sale was made, she didn’t hesitate to accept.

They dated for six months before she started getting the feeling that he was selling more than cars. Hearing him have secretive one-sided conversations on the phone and seeing him meet shady looking characters in neighborhoods known to be frequented by crime lords made her suspicious, but the day she found a small bag of crack cocaine in his apartment was the day she was officially done with him.

When she broke it off, Neal begged her to stay, bragging about how he was in line to become very important and wealthy someday soon, and would provide her with everything her heart desired. Emma assured him she did not desire to be in the company of drug dealers and walked away, determined to put that chapter of her life behind her.

Having witnessed his sales techniques, she was well aware that he was persistent, but his persistence rapidly turned into obsession. She received dozens of texts from him every day, along with numerous calls she refused to answer. After listening to a few voicemails he left declaring his love for her, she deleted the rest and blocked his number.

That didn’t deter him, though. He continued showing up at her apartment, the gym where she worked out, and her place of employment - the swanky hotel where she tended bar. It was annoying, but she didn’t feel threatened and didn’t think a restraining order against him was necessary.

After several months of rebuffing or simply ignoring him, she was relieved when two days in a row went by without any contact from him. Then Ruby called to tell her he had been busted for drug trafficking and was awaiting a hearing. A trial followed, he was sentenced to five years in prison, and Emma hoped she had seen the last of Neal Cassidy.

*********

Emma dragged herself up the two flights of stairs to her apartment on wobbly legs. She was still trembling from the encounter at the coffee shop, unable to shake the image of her deceased ex-boyfriend from her mind.

She had finally managed to send Ruby a text, asking her if she had proof Neal was actually dead. Ruby replied that her friend Dorothy, who worked at the prison where Neal was serving his time, saw his body on the gurney as he was taken out, and talked to the guard who found him hanging by a bed sheet. He was definitely dead.

The only explanation Emma could come up with for seeing Neal outside the window was that the shock of reading Ruby’s text caused her to conjure an image of him. But that didn’t explain the feeling she had of being watched or followed all the way home, making the hairs on the back of her neck stand on end.

When she reached the third floor, she wasn’t surprised to see her friend and neighbor, Killian Jones, in the hallway between their two doors, fiddling with a metal box which was emitting a strange humming sound. As a paranormal investigator and the host of a popular YouTube channel called “Killian Jones - Ghost Hunter”, he was always trying out various pieces of equipment.

He glanced up, his striking blue eyes fastening on her before his face split into a grin. “Hey, Swan. How are you today?”

She answered vaguely as she stopped in front of her door. Suddenly, the humming sound increased in volume and pitch and Killian’s smile faded into a look of confusion. Picking up what looked like a radar gun laying beside him on the floor, he stood and held it between himself and Emma.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

He didn’t answer, too intent on circling her slowly and studying the numbers on the gadget. When he finally looked up several seconds later, he hesitantly commented, “Swan…it appears you have a…a ghost following you.”

Emma felt the blood drain from her face and her knees buckle, which was the last thing she remembered before everything went black.

Killian barely caught Emma in time to keep her from hitting the floor as she fainted. Hoisting her up into his arms, he carried her inside his apartment. This was not how he expected her to end up in his arms, but he would take what he could get.

*********

The two of them had lived beside each other ever since Killian moved into the apartment next to hers when he arrived in Boston five years ago. At first, they just exchanged pleasantries when they passed in the hall. After a few months, they began to have short conversations about the weather and their frustration with the landlord. That led to them doing favors for one another, such as taking in packages, bringing the other’s clothes upstairs from the laundry room, and picking up items one of them forgot to buy at the grocery store. Eventually, they built up enough trust in each other that they traded apartment keys to make it more convenient to drop things off.

Every once in a while, they would share a pizza while watching TV in one of their apartments. Seeing Emma so relaxed in her own home, laughing and bantering with him, started Killian down the road of developing deeper feelings toward her. He was enamored with her wit and intelligence and thought she was the most beautiful woman he’d ever met.

At times, he witnessed men coming to her door to pick her up for a date, something that always left him feeling bereft. Fortunately, most of them never came around more than once. He enjoyed listening to her humorous assessments of each man’s shortcomings afterwards.

Then she started dating Neal Cassidy, and during those months, Killian hardly saw her. When he did bump into the couple, Neal treated him with disdain, looking down his nose at him and scoffing at everything Killian said. It was made worse by the fact that Emma didn’t even seem to notice. Killian was sure he had missed his chance of acting on his feelings for her.

He almost felt guilty for being ecstatic upon finding out she’d broken up with Neal. His happiness turned to concern and then anger when Emma told him Neal wouldn’t leave her alone. The two men had words several times when Killian found him hanging around in the hall outside her apartment. Then Emma told him Neal had been arrested and sent to prison, and he was beyond relieved that the idiot wouldn’t be bothering her anymore.

Still, Killian didn’t ask her out, reasoning that she’d just gotten out of a bad relationship. He continued to fall for her more and more, while she remained completely unaware of his burgeoning feelings toward her. Feelings that, by now, felt a lot like love.

*********

After laying her on his couch, Killian tapped Emma’s cheeks, urging, “Swan! Swan! Wake up! You have to wake up, Love.” When she didn’t respond, he scrubbed a hand down his face. “Bloody hell, Lass. I didn’t mean to frighten you that badly.”

He glanced around the living room, trying to figure out what to do to help Emma regain consciousness. Going into his kitchen, he took a clean dish towel out of the drawer, placed some ice cubes inside and while there, grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge.

She was still out cold when he emerged a minute later. Concern etched his face. In all the years he lived next door to Emma Swan, he never knew her to be anything but tough and strong. Seeing her lying there so ashen and unmoving unnerved him. He lifted her head slightly to place the ice under her neck.

Convinced there was nothing more he could do at the moment, he went back out to the hallway and collected his EMF meter, noticing that it was back to a steady hum. Picking up the infrared thermometer he had dropped, he saw the temperature had returned to normal. No more cold spots. Apparently whatever spirit that had entered the hallway with Emma was gone.

Reentering his apartment, he sat on the coffee table in front of the sofa to keep vigil over his neighbor, continuing to pat her cheeks and call her name from time to time. After several more long minutes, her eyelids began to flutter, then slowly opened. Her eyes darted around, obviously trying to figure out where she was. He could tell the moment she figured it out, because she groaned and covered her face with her hands.

“Please tell me I didn’t faint,” she pleaded.

“I wish I could, but that would be untrue,” he responded, tilting his head to offer her a small, reassuring smile when she uncovered her eyes.

She started to sit up, but he put a hand to her shoulder to stop her. “Easy, Swan. Better lie still a bit longer.”

With a huff of annoyance, she laid back down, adjusting the ice pack behind her neck. “Thank you for taking care of me.”

“You’re welcome.”

She lay quietly for a while, nibbling on her bottom lip. “May I ask you something?”

“Of course.”

“Why, uh…why did you say that I had a ghost with me?”

She was obviously trying to pass off the question as being simply one of curiosity, but the look in her eyes told him she was quite serious about it.

“The infrared thermometer showed a definite cold spot and the EMF detector…”

“EMF detector?” she questioned. “What’s that?”

He sighed in frustration. “Don’t you ever watch my videos, Swan?” No matter how many times he talked to her about his show, he could never get her to commit to watching his YouTube channel.

“You know I don’t believe in ghosts,” she said.

He rolled his eyes before explaining. “An EMF detector measures electromagnetic fields. A high reading indicates the presence of a spirit.” He paused, making sure he worded his next statement carefully. “And perhaps you had better rethink your position on ghosts, because my instruments strongly suggested paranormal activity around you.”

She closed her eyes and cursed. Killian picked up the bottle of water and held it out to her. She sat up and accepted it, taking a long drink as she propped her feet on the table beside him.

“Care to enlighten me as to why you fainted when I told you my findings?” he inquired.

Capping the bottle, she held it against her forehead for a minute or two - long enough for Killian to wonder if she was going to give him an answer. Finally, she looked up at him and murmured, “Do you remember Neal Cassidy?”

“The wanker who hung around outside your apartment for months after you broke up with him?”

“That’s the one. Did I tell you that he was sentenced to prison for drug trafficking?”

“Aye, you did.”

“Well, apparently he hung himself in his cell. They found his body this morning.”

Killian let out a low whistle. “You think it could be his spirit that was causing my instruments to spike?”

She looked down again, fiddling with the label on the water bottle. “Possibly…because…” She drew in a deep breath. “Because I saw him outside the coffee shop this morning,” she said on an exhale.

Trying not to overreact and make Emma even more uncomfortable, he swallowed hard. “Now, when you say you saw him…”

“I mean I saw him,” she emphasized. “My friend Ruby texted to tell me about Neal’s death and as I was in the process of answering her, I noticed this shadow that didn’t move outside the window where I was sitting. When I looked up, Neal was standing there, staring right at me. I blinked, then he was gone.”

Killian’s ‘ghost hunter’ mind was getting excited about the prospect of being able to investigate a spirit practically under his own nose, but his heart went out to her. Being haunted was something he was more or less used to, but he wouldn’t wish it on anyone.

“Did you see him again after that?” he asked.

“No, but I had this…feeling while I was walking home; like someone was watching me. It really freaked me out.”

“So when I told you there was a ghost following you…”

“It was lights out for me.” She buried her face in her hands. “I���m so embarrassed. I’ve never fainted before.”

Killian reached over and squeezed her shoulder. “There’s no reason for embarrassment, Love. I’ve met many people who’ve had the exact same reaction when faced with the possibility of being in the presence of a ghost.”

“Seriously?”

He rubbed his thumb against the bridge of his nose, trying to contain his impatience. “If you watched my YouTube channel, you would be aware of that.”

“No offense, but the last thing I want to do right now is watch people being haunted.”

“That’s quite understandable, considering what you’ve been through today.”

She took another swig of water, then looked up at him. “Do you think he’s gone? Moved on, or whatever?”

Killian blew out a breath. “Probably not. My guess is he has unfinished business or he would have already moved on.”

“That’s just great,” Emma muttered sarcastically. “How long can I expect him to hang around?”

“Until he accomplishes what he needs to do.”

“So what am I supposed to do until then?” she moaned.

“Just go about your daily routine. If you see him or sense he’s there, gently tell him that he has died and needs to move on.”

 “So saying ‘go to hell’ wouldn’t be a wise choice?”

He bark laughed. “I’m not sure that would be very effective.”

She drained the rest of the water, set the empty bottle on the table and stood up. Killian stood too, placing his hand on the small of her back. “Alright there, Swan?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. I’m gonna go get something to eat and take it easy this afternoon until I have to go to work.”

“That sounds like a good plan.” As she started toward the door, he added, “Uh, Emma? Could I ask a favor of you?”

She turned to look at him. “A favor for the guy who carried me into his apartment and took care of me when I fainted like a prissy debutante? Sure.”

“If, um, if Neal’s spirit does reappear, would you be opposed to letting me document it?”

Crossing her arms over her chest, she tilted her head in contemplation. “What would you do exactly?”

“Use equipment to detect paranormal activity and post it to my YouTube channel.”

“You mean that ESPN detector and stuff like that?”

He sighed in exasperation. “It’s EMF, Swan. Yes, that and voice recorders to conduct EVP sessions…”

She raised an eyebrow at him. “Stop saying letters. You know I don’t know what that shit means.”

“Electronic voice phenomena sessions record sounds or voices from ghosts. If he’s trying to communicate with you, we might be able to pick it up on a voice recorder.”

Shrugging, she replied, “That’s fine. I’m sure it would get lots of hits for your channel.”

He stepped into her personal space, sincerity shining in his eyes. “I hope you know that’s not why I want to do this, Emma. My goal is to help you encourage him to move on so you will no longer have to deal with him. It’s bad enough he stalked you while he was alive; doing it after he’s dead is even worse.”

She gave a slight nod. “You’re right about that.” Pushing up to her toes, she brushed a kiss to his cheek. “Thanks again for everything, Killian. If I get the feeling he’s back, I’ll call you right away.”

“Day or night, Swan. I’m at your beck and call.”

“Good to know,” she smirked. “I’ll see you later.”

He watched her walk out the door, reaching up to rub his cheek where she kissed him. He was going to have to do his best to remain professional around her, but potentially having Emma as his next subject was going to be quite the challenge.

*********

Emma entered her apartment, quickly flipped on the light switch, and glanced around nervously. Not seeing or sensing anything out of the ordinary, she moved into the kitchen.

After heating up leftovers and eating lunch, she climbed into her worn, comfy recliner to scroll through Hulu. She tried to concentrate on her selected show, but her eyes kept darting around the room. “Fuck you, Neal,” she muttered. “Making me paranoid in my own home.”

Finally giving up on watching TV, she went into her bedroom to select her clothes for work that evening. Then she decided to take a long, relaxing bath. The longer she soaked in the tub without any sign of Neal’s ghostly image, the more she relaxed.

By the time she left for work three hours later, she was nearly back to her normal self and very hopeful that he had indeed moved on.

*********

After Emma left his apartment, Killian tidied up - dumping the melting ice cubes into the sink, hanging the towel to dry, and throwing the empty water bottle into his recycling bin. Then he checked all of his ghost hunting equipment, setting the batteries to charge if they were a little low.

Plopping down on the couch, he pulled up the message app on his phone and clicked on the group text with his technical director, Belle French, and his assistant, Will Scarlett.

K: We may have a new gig right here in my apartment building.

As expected, he got an immediate response from Will. The man’s eyes were practically glued to his phone screen most of the time.

W: Got a haunter right under your nose, do ya?

Belle’s answer several minutes later was a little more refined.

B: Can you provide us with any details?

K: My neighbor’s ex-boyfriend committed suicide in prison and she’s experiencing some paranormal activity. She says she saw his ghost outside a coffee shop and when she got home, I was in the hall with the EMF meter and thermo. Both of them spiked.

B: Oh, wow! That’s incredible! Sad for the guy and your neighbor, but what an opportunity!

W: Is this neighbor the hot blonde you’ve been crushin’ on for years?

Killian dropped his head back and groaned. He should have known better than to have confessed his unrequited feelings to his assistant during a boring all-nighter in an old warehouse in Portland, Maine last year.

K: That’s a very crass way to put it, but yes, it’s Emma.

W: You mean we might actually get to meet her?

K: Not if you’re going to be an ass about it.

W: I’ll be on me best behavior, I promise.

K: Why doesn’t that reassure me?

B: What are your plans, Killian?

Leave it to Belle to be the peacemaker of the conversation, Killian thought. If he was feeling vengeful toward Will, he could mention the crush his friend had on the auburn-haired beauty. How she never realized it, Killian would never know. Will was the very definition of heart eyes whenever he was around her.

K: I’ve got my equipment ready to go. If she senses anything, she’s going to call me. If it’s a recurring thing, we’ll set up an EVP session. I’ll let you know if anything happens. Just wanted to put you on alert.

B: Sounds good. I’ll be editing tomorrow. The new episode should be ready to post by Thursday.

K: Thanks, Belle. You’re the best!

W: He’s right, ya know. You really are bloody brilliant.

Seriously - how could she not see it when Will was always falling all over himself to proclaim her perfection?

Once Killian ended the conversation, he wandered into the room he used as his office.

“Hello, little brother.”

*********

From a very early age, Killian had been able to sense paranormal activity. He was confused by it for many years, but as he grew and began to read about ghosts, he realized he had a gift, albeit an unwanted one.

When he was twelve, his mother passed and he was there to witness her soul departing her body. She only stayed long enough to declare her never-ending love for her boys and bid him goodbye, before she moved on to her eternal reward.

Eight years later, when Liam died in a naval training exercise, Killian expected him to join their mother. However, his brother’s apparition began appearing to him from time to time. At first, his appearance was simply a mist, barely recognizable, but as Killian did more research into the paranormal and practiced tapping into his abilities, it became more discernible. Still, he was frustrated that he could see his brother, but was unable to speak to him.

He purchased several pieces of equipment used by paranormal investigators, hoping to enhance his encounters with Liam. They turned out to be very helpful, but Liam soon learned to communicate with his brother well enough that the tools weren’t necessary.

On a whim, Killian posted videos of himself explaining the use of equipment to make contact with ghosts on YouTube, and soon he was in demand as a paranormal investigator. People were willing to pay large sums of money to be able to make contact with their departed loved ones, or to encourage ghosts to move on. He quit his job as a dock worker and began traveling, taking his friend Will along with him, and when the technical aspects of editing and posting to YouTube proved too daunting, he hired Belle.

Even his closest friends were unaware that Killian’s deceased brother appeared and spoke with him on a regular basis; he wanted to keep that part of his life to himself.

*********

It still startled Killian whenever the apparition of his brother appeared, but it wasn’t ever an unwelcome intrusion. His visits never lasted long, but there was always enough time for a nice chat.

“Perhaps you’ve forgotten I’m a grown man and therefore your younger brother,” Killian reminded Liam, for at least the fiftieth time.

“I’m not sure that’s technically true any more, since you’ve now lived past the age I was when I died.”

Killian hated it when Liam talked about his own death. “You were born before me, so you’ll always be older.”

“Hmm…” Liam responded, giving his brother the maddening little nod that meant he was right and Killian was wrong. “So, the lovely lass you’re pining for was here today, aye?”

“How did you know that?” Killian asked unnecessarily. Obviously Liam had popped in and, being a tad preoccupied taking care of Emma, he hadn’t noticed.

“I’m not doing the job of watching over my little brother very well if I don’t know what’s going on in his life.”

Killian had never come right out and asked Liam about the unfinished business that kept him from moving on, but having been his guardian for years before his death, he was sure it was to continue taking care of him. Not that he needed it, but he wasn’t complaining, as long as he had a chance to have his older brother with him in some shape or form.

“She, uh…she fainted so I brought her in to lay her on my sofa. I couldn’t very well let her lay on the floor in the hallway.”

“What caused her to faint?” Liam asked, his playful tone giving way to concern.

“Seems she was visited by the ghost of her departed ex-boyfriend. You didn’t see him hanging around, did you?”

“You know spirits seldom bump into one another, unless they were associated with each other while they were living.”

“I just thought I would ask. It spooked her badly - no pun intended.”

“Have you agreed to help her?”

“Aye, if I can. The guy made her life miserable when he was alive. She shouldn’t have to put up with him after his death.”

Liam studied his brother for several moments. “Perhaps this will give you a chance to get closer to her. Maybe you’ll even work up the nerve to finally ask her out.”

Killian sighed. “I’m not going to do that when she’s so vulnerable, Liam. I simply want to get the tosser to move on.”

“And after that?”

“I don’t know,” Killian conceded.

“You’ve had feelings for that lass for ages, Killy. When are you going to act on them?”

“I’m afraid she’s only ever going to think of me as a friend. If I ask her out and she turns me down, I might lose her friendship, and I don’t want that to happen.”

“You’ll never know unless you try.”

Killian didn’t answer. He’d had this conversation with his brother before and Liam always pushed him to ask Emma out. He didn’t understand why his love life was so important to his brother, but whenever he asked him, Liam was evasive and refused to answer.

“Just think about it, Killian. I have to go. I love you, Brother.”

“Love you, too, Liam.”

He watched his brother’s translucent form dissolve, leaving him sad and lonely, as always. He didn’t know when Liam would complete his unfinished business, but he did know that when he finally did, Killian would be left alone once again.

Unbeknownst to him, Liam’s unfinished business was to see his brother happily married to the love of his life, but it was up to Killian to take the first step.

*********

Thanks very much for reading. Be sure to check out the other great stories in the CSSNS24 collection!

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[sourcherrieslatte]

INTRO TO MY AVENGERS REALITY.

— ABOUT ME;

NAME; arcadia stark

ALIAS; ultraviolet

BIRTHDAY; september 9th, 2000

PRONOUNS; she/they

— POWERS/ABILITIES;

* this isn't the whole, detailed list. more just a general overview.

ENHANCED STRENGTH ;

❝ The user can lift thousands of pounds to tens of thousands and perform any offensive action with the force of a massive vehicle. The user can lift cars, trucks, buses, small-moderately sized boulders, tall trees, and a few times the weight of peak humans. ❞

ENHANCED INTELLIGENCE ;

❝ Users with this power possess extreme levels of intellect, enabling them to memorize and calculate vast amounts of information with exceptional precision. They can handle and interpret vast amounts of information at a phenomenal speed, and use their mental capabilities to predict their enemies’ movements and attack trajectories with pure logic alone. ❞

REGENERATION ;

❝ Users possess a regenerative healing factor, meaning that they automatically and rapidly flawlessly heal and regenerate from any physical, spiritual, and mental damage, attacks, harm, assault, and injuries they take and get restored to their optimal and full health/state at an extremely fast rate. ❞

ENERGY MANIPULATION ;

❝ The user can freely create, shape, and manipulate energy. They possess complete control over energy, the capacity or ability to cause change or do work, one of the most basic quantitative properties of a system, such as an object or a field of energy. Energy can be transformed (converted) into a number of forms that may each manifest and be measurable in differing ways. ❞

ARMORED SUIT ;

❝ The user possesses and utilizes a special suit, costume, or article of clothing that grants them a variety of powers or other attributes. ❞

— BACKSTORY;

Now loading...

1% █▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒

...It wasn't a choice, really. When you're handed two evils, of course you're going to pick the lesser of the two. Even if you know it'll only lead to pain and suffering. At least this way, maybe one of you will survive to tell the tale...

25% ███▒▒▒▒▒▒▒

...My first impression of the world is that, to some degree, people must be inherently cruel. My second, is that they must also be inherently scared. I am unsure as of yet how these two things are connected, but I know they must be...

50% █████▒▒▒▒▒

...The newest arrival must either be incredibly stupid, or incredibly brave. The doctor seems inclined to believe it's the latter. I personally think this guy's liable to get us all blown up if he isn't careful. He is pretty nice to me, though...

75% ███████▒▒▒

...Tony doesn't want me to build a suit. Jokes on him, though, I know the passcodes to everything around here. Will I get some obnoxiously long lecture about not putting myself in danger for doing this? Probably. Am I going do it anyways?

Definitely...

100% ██████████

Complete!

— EXTRA;

GENERAL VIBES; neon lights, ripped jeans, mismatched socks, the smell of freshly brewed coffee, old notebooks, barely legible handwriting, messy doodles, loud music, faded tshirts, sour candies, bruised knuckles

MINI PLAYLIST; headlock - imogen heap // joyride. - kesha // the last of the real ones - fall out boy // what's up danger - blackway, black cavier // ain't it fun - paramore

[popawritter12]

Yandere!Clark Kent + Yandere!Bruce Wayne x female!reader

𝕐𝕒𝕟𝕕𝕖𝕣𝕖 𝕔𝕙𝕒𝕣𝕒𝕔𝕥𝕖𝕣𝕤: Bruce Wayne and Clark Kent

𝕄𝕒𝕟𝕘𝕒| 𝔸𝕟𝕚𝕞𝕖| 𝕧𝕚𝕕𝕖𝕠𝕘𝕒𝕞𝕖| 𝕥𝕧 𝕠𝕣 𝕞𝕠𝕧𝕚𝕖 𝕤𝕖𝕣𝕚𝕖: Dc movie series (?

ℂ𝕒𝕤𝕖: Scenes of jealousy, attempted aggression.

ℙ𝕒𝕣𝕥:1 of 1

𝕎𝕒𝕣𝕟𝕚𝕟𝕘: I spent several days trying to do something coherent, I didn't like Batman vs Superman nor did I find a coherent way to make a Yandere story of these two. But hey, this is the final result, which is located after the events of the new flash movie (I mean, the new reboot of the DC world)

{AND YES, I PUT A PHOTO OF BATMAN VS SUPERMAN BECAUSE I THINK IT WAS AWESOME}

⋆ටᆼට⋆ ⋆ටᆼට⋆ ⋆ටᆼට⋆ ⋆ටᆼට⋆

Coffee, cooked mate, tea, black tea, green tea, smoothies, croissants, ice cream.

You smell the sweet atmosphere and feel the warmth of the cafeteria atmosphere fill your soul and body with happiness. As if you have changed from a horrendous and heavy environment to one full of happiness and peace and love, you smile, thinking about what to ask for.

For a few days you longed for a break from work, and finally you had it, you could finally have breakfast in complete peace, without worrying about whether you arrived late or late to a place or to do such a thing.

After talking to the clerk about what you were asking for, you sit down to think about your life, and what you could do today. Walk in the park? Watch a movie? Or maybe just lie in bed and sleep like you've never slept in your life.

Or maybe... visit Barry, one of your best friends.

Yeah, that sounded like a great idea, catch up and talk like they did before they got into college.

But... Something went wrong, something interrupted the little rest you had, and you knew that thanks to the people who suddenly went outside.

As if everything were a chaos orchestrated by destiny, as if it were God who had decided to let humans take the reins of their destiny, you see how a kind of fabric is torn in the sky. A hole in the shape of torn cloth reveals two men, peering out of the gloomy chaos that had ensued.

People watched, took photos with their cell phones or recorded videos, or were directly shocked by the bizarre situation in which they lived. The surreal thing about this fact was that a part of you thought that Barry was in danger.

A pang that runs through your stomach as if it were your body telling you something, forces you to start pushing people.

Elbows, shouts, pushes; everything seemed like chaos with the people who began to mobilize.

You walk out of the cafeteria, looking directly into the hole that had opened up.

As strange as it may seem, or as fearful as you did not express, you were able to see two people in the distance that you casually or conveniently knew.

---Bruce? ---Questions with a small voice ---, Clark?

All the noise that people were making because of the shouting, or just because of the amount of people moving slowly fades away, as if your brain was only focused on the two people who were there, above, staring at you, as if they were watching you. searching.

It is then that the hole gets bigger, and an immediate desire to run or hide from what was going to happen ran through your mind and body taking over you

But... everything was in vain, everything had already been determined, everything had already been done, as if destiny had already been written on a stone.

You can see it, the world you've known, the people you've always loved, or even your very existence disappears.

In a blink, you go from being at work, watching the world be destroyed by something you didn't even understand, to waking up from your bed.

You remove the sheets from your body with violence, throwing the sheets on the floor. You look around you, scared; it was your room, but almost completely different.

Instead of posters of your favorite bands, there are posters of people you didn't know. From titles like "The woman in the cabaza" or "The dance of the end of the world" were movie titles that you had seen in your life.

Instead of losing your mind, or starting to panic, you know you can't lose your mind now.

Inhale, hold, exhale, inhale, hold, exhale.

You kept up the routine for a few minutes, until you even managed to keep the peace, even now.

---Remember; everything is fine, everything is fine, ---You inhale again, trying to keep the peace ---, everyone is alive, it was just a nightmare, it was just one more nightmare.

After a few minutes that at this point seemed endlessly insufferable, a sudden call interrupts your attempt to keep all your ducklings in line.

Seeing the cell phone, which was on top of a small book that was on top of a wooden shelf, you take it in your hands.

"Barry <3"

A small hope that everything was a nightmare appears, so you answer.

---Hello? (Name)? --- You hear his voice, like a worried older brother.

---Barry? ---You questions, happy.

You listen for a moment as if Barry did sounds of a happy person, as if he is celebrating that you still remember him.

---It's good that you remind me...! --- He cuts off his own sentence ---, I mean, I'm glad you're okay

---Yes, I'm fine... ---You answer, averting your gaze ---, I just... woke up.

--- Thank goodness --- He whispers, as if he were nervous ---, by the way, can we meet somewhere?

---Yes, s-sounds perfect ---You whisper, trying to hide your nervousness ---, where can we meet?

---I can hear you're nervous, did you have another nightmare? ---He asks.

You blink a few times, remembering that he knew about the nightmares you had for practically your entire life.

---Yeah... It was horrible ---Your voice cracks ---, I can't believe it felt so real!

---Huh? But if all your nightmares feel real... ---He mentions, confused.

---B-But... I could see as if the world was destroyed, something in the sky opened up! ---You explain, nervous ---. Everything was fine, it was my day off but... when I went outside, something in the sky opened up and...

---Oh... ---He whispered, this time more confused ---.., wait, did it open and something or someone peeked out? Like a person or...

---Bruce and Clark! The two of them peered out of the hole that opened ---You express, worsening your condition.

Barry is silent, it was noticeable that his words were stuck in his throat. It is then that, after a few seconds and listening to you sob with fear.

---(Name)... ---Barry called you.

---And I thought it was a dream because everything was being quite strange, and... ---You explained, getting out of bed and looking at the posters in your room ---, I'm in a stranger's room!

---(Name)

---It looks a lot like mine! But it has very... strange tastes, I've never met any of these bands or movies ---You say, investigating the room further.

---(Name) ---He calls you once more.

---What's happening?

---It was not a nightmare.

---What? ---You ask, before listening to someone knock on your door.

---(Name), I need you to go to the park in front of your house, Bruce and I will be there, okay? --- Explains Barry, you could see that he was trying to stay calm.

---O-Okay... ---You whisper, ending the call quickly, looking at the door.

After a few seconds of mustering as much courage as possible, you go to the door and open it. Your fear is suddenly replaced by surprise when you see who was there.

---Clark?! ---Your voice is shot throughout the house, to your surprise, you can see it there; completely calm.

He was carrying a white ceramic cup with flowers, which seemed to have something inside.

---What's up, (Name)? ---Clark asks, confused ---, are you okay?

You look at him for a few seconds, trying not to say something that would probably be very incoherent. You look at the cup that he was carrying in his hands.

---It's nothing... Did you need something? ---Questions, playing with your hands.

---Oh, nothing, nothing ---He repeats, with his cheeks a little reddish ---, I just wanted to bring you a cup of coffee, as I saw that you didn't get up.

You blink a few times, before seeing how he extends the cup towards you.

---Thank you... ---You whisper, before taking the cup in your hands.

--- By the way, --- He mentions, before suddenly changing his tone --- who was that you were talking to?

You can see that because his body was tense and his tone of voice had changed, he sounded different than what you were used to.

--- It was Barry --- You answer, drinking from the cup between your hands ---, he said he needed me to go to the park near here.

--- Oh, --- His voice changes even more for a moment, erasing the smile on his face, but suddenly it's back to normal.

---I'll go now ---You say, happy ---, say hi to Louis for me.

As you walk past your good friend, he suddenly grabs your arm, not forcefully, and in fact hardly exerts any force in his grip.

--- (Name) --- he calls you ---, can I go with you?

---Hey?

Your smile disappears, before scratching the back of your neck with one of your hands.

---Well... Barry says that Bruce will be there, don't you think it would be better if I go alone?

Yes, you were perfectly aware of the certain tension that existed in their relationship, therefore, it was best to avoid conflicts.

---All the more reason I must go... ---he whispered, tightening his grip on your arm a little.

---That?

---No, no, nothing... ---He lets go of your arm, nervous ---, I just want to make sure you're safe.

---But... I'll be with Barry and Bruce... ---You answer, confused ---Besides...

--- (Name) --- he calls you again, taking you back, now grabbing your arm, --- May I go with you?

You can see that his body acted unconsciously, as if he really needed to accompany you before anything else in the whole world.

"Well...okay." You relent, letting a heavy sigh fall from your lips.

You can see how his attitude and face change, his grip is quickly removed, and a smile appears on his lips.

---Okay --- he whispers.

＼（＠￣∇￣＠）／＼（＠￣∇￣＠）／

＼（＠￣∇￣＠）／＼（＠￣∇￣＠）／

You can feel how the tension in the air increases with each second of silence that was between the four of you.

---Uh, well... ---Barry whispers, playing with his hands, before walking next to you ---...It's good that we're together now!

---Yes, thank goodness... ---You whisper, before looking at your best friend ---.., Barry, could you tell me about the nightmare?

Bruce looked at you, you could see a soft smile tugging at his lips, before speaking.

---You didn't tell him anything, Barry? ---Bruce asks, intrigued.

---Eh, no, she doesn't know yet ---The young man answers, before looking at you.

---Know what, exactly? ---Asks Clark, again being serious.

---It's complicated.. ---You whisper, before taking a breath ----.., apparently I had a nightmare, as is recurring, but they're telling me it wasn't!

One of your hands goes to your lips, your nails settling between your teeth, until Barry takes your hand.

---Hey, hey, hey ---He's calling you ---, I know this is all complicated, but for now we're not in danger, so let's sit down and...

You can not just one, but two hands grab Barry's wrist, abruptly pulling his hand away from yours.

---Keep your distance, Barry/kid ---Both Clark and Bruce say at the same time.

The surrealism of the scene, along with the sudden reaction of both of you, surprised both Barry and you.

Barry quickly pushes them away, his tone changing suddenly.

---What's wrong with them? ---Barry asks, confused and frowning.

Neither of us could say anything, because you directly speak louder than usual

---What's wrong with all of you? ---You ask, with anger in your tone---. We can't fight now, especially not over something as small as him grabbing my hand! --- You approach Barry, taking his shoulder ---, don't fight, do you really want to make a scene having, I don't know...? More than 28 years?

After the nightmare that seemed to be real, the display of obvious jealousy on Clark's part, and an obvious attempt at another jealousy scene, you were on the brink of losing your mind.

Clark and Bruce don't act like they used to, where did your kind reporter who was actually one of the strongest superheroes on the face of the earth go? Or your good friend who showed you appreciation very rarely? By whom were they replaced?

You can see that both men stare at you, while Barry tried to calm the situation by talking, positioning himself in front of you. But that only caused the look of both of them... Yanderes to intensify, they will begin to lose patience, as if they were on the verge of taking Barry and... damaging him a little, with their own hands.

You know what I mean, don't you, (Name)?

＼（＠￣∇￣＠）／＼（＠￣∇￣＠）／

.

.

.

.

.

.

I don't give a shit what the world thinks; The Bruce that appears in the last Flash movie is great, or at least I like how the actor looks.

[ashaflemythal]

I haven’t seen any real critical takes on veilguard on here, so I wanted to add my 2 cents and open up a discussion bc at this moment I would say I’m beefing with BioWare lol.

Firstly, did I have fun playing veilguard? Uh, yes? I guess? Technically? I would definitely say the combat system and a lot of the gameplay itself is far better than it has been in previous games, and made me more engaged.

However, the writing issues at BioWare came to a major head here.

1) i didn’t feel like they went into the political and social implications of what was going on at all?? The elven gods coming back would bring so many other consequences beyond the destruction and blight. We didn’t see how this affected the way elves were treated, especially somewhere like Tevinter.

2) what happened to the Templar/mage conflict? The implications of the elven gods being alive and back are that then the chant and chantry are mostly wrong. There is no “magic was made to serve man and never rule over him.” This would likely make mages lash out at templars for being oppressed over what have turned out to essentially be lies. The templars then would likely split into those that leave the chant and focus on the real threats before them, and those who dig in their heels and decide that mages should still be oppressed bc of the dangers no matter what the chantry says. This would be such an interesting political shift to witness! And I’m sad we didn’t get this amount of depth

3) what happened to Solas’ followers? There was something so interesting to explore about having current elves helping him because they felt he was doing the right thing. We don’t run into any of his followers at all! And elves would definitely have more than enough reason to seek the world of the ancients and return to Arlathan given tevinter slavery and general oppression across Thedas, so what happened to that?

4) the only complex companion relationship that is allowed in-game is with rook and whoever was hardened with the treviso/minrathous choice. Otherwise, you can’t really have an antagonistic relationship with any of them. The only way to not progress a good relationship is to not engage in their content which I feel like is very weak writing. In DAI, you walk in on Cassandra and varric physically fighting and have to side with one of them. You can tell Cullen to keep taking lyrium. You can pick the wrong option in a companion quest and worsen your relationship. Where was that in this game?

5) the roleplaying, or lack there of. Sometimes I would pick the most aggressive option and it would still sound pretty nice, all things considered, where is my ability to feel differently outside of the very narrow window the game provides?

6) the STAKES of it all. The companions all seem very chill about things, all things considered. They are finding out things that would politically turn thedas on its head, and they’re having these calm discussions around a coffee table. I’m currently on my second play through, and it feels like none of these discoveries are given the weight they deserved, after three games of built up lore.

7) the gods’ allies. The motivations of the bad guys can pretty much be summed up by saying “want power” and that creates such shallow villains. Like yeah, obviously they’re bad bc they just want power and don’t care about people, but what about villains that do care about others? Villains that are complicated? I mean hell even though Alexius was mostly like “yes corypheus power” there was that grounding aspect of him wanting to save his son who was sick. I don’t feel like we had anything that tangible or real from major villains in veilguard

Ok, long post, but I do feel like BioWare has started to shy away from nuance and gray areas in a way I don’t like. It is important to show the complicated perspectives of evil people because that is the same thing we have to deal with irl. As an action-adventure game, it’s fine, but veilguard can scarcely call itself a true rpg. I don’t know, my feelings about it are complicated but all I know is that this game was quite disappointing to me especially compared to DAI, and I want to hope for better from the next game but given the way their BioWare’s last couple releases have gone I can’t say I’m expecting a lot. Anyway, how are yall feeling fr?

[tomorrowsgardennc]

market update // september 14th

drop off versus set up. i get to the market super early, even though setting up takes me 15 minutes, tops. i prefer to avoid the traffic of other vendors setting up, and i like to volunteer around the market before it opens. it's around 50 vendors at this market during the main season (april until december), so it can get busy super quick right before the market opens with everyone coming in at the last minute. not worth the stress when i can just come in early and help others out.

today blew me away. literally. had gusts of wind that were so bad a power pole fell down right outside the parking lot. that means the road that's the main traffic for the market was closed after 30 minutes of being open. that killed sales for *everyone*, including the big bois that sell out every week. coffee barrista vendor said their sales were down to 1/3rd their normal amount because of this. but the die hards willing to brave traffic and walking 2 blocks from parking to the market still made it out.

tue big bois were panicing over sales, but a horrific day in sales for me here still beat a great day of sales at other markets in previous years. no panicing from me, for once. if the road wasn't closed but sales were the same as today THEN i would panic. c'est la vie and all.

my top sellers were the ground cherry produce and the mini flower vases. none of those sales were my normal customers but rather the die-hards just browsing since they weren't eager to get back into traffic. so i met some new faces today, that's good. top reactions to people trying out the ground cherries go to a 3yo trying one, then shaking their head vigorously and then hiding in their mothers hair. another 6yo tried one and then just quickly started eating a whole bunch more. the mom paid for it, blushing, but i thought it was cute.

so imma share a secret with you, tumblr. for me to pass the time, i always wave to the kids who stare at me and tally up how many wave back. my record is 5 in one day. today was only 1. will try and wave better next week.

with it being an unsually slow day, i did end up going home with more than what i came with. but today is also my birthday so that's ok. ton of bread from my favorite bread baker in all the charlotte area, plus bagels, apples, cookies... got 2 large flower bouquets - one for a colleague who passed away this week, and another for me because birthday. thinking about merging all the large flowers together and take them to the place where he worked tomorrow, and keep the small ones for me. idk, i just love smaller bouquets spread around the house instead of one big one.

i didn't take an after-market shot because there was almost no difference at all due to lack of traffic. i did try and get photos throughout the day to share here and i hope that this new series of posts help inspire those who want to or are beginning their business vending journey. i've been vending at several markets and too many events over the past 5 years, so i got a lot of pointers and stories to share. please enjoy.

[afconfessions]

I wanted to write before going to sleep and so I personally need to project my Cyalm illness to the world 💥

★—————★

"Despite his... initial malice, he's quite the gentleman if I say so myself. I will admit that his tastes are quite magnificent, if only his personality were the same."

I always saw Cyalm as an older individual, and I DO mean 40's or even 50's if we're going to push it. He's not just some dreamer with a youthful passion: He is a natural intellectual, adorned with years of wisdom and knowledge that could decimate an optimistic youth with his harsh reality. He may think that he's past his prime for measly things such as "writing", but he's getting old, so why not enjoy these simple things while he has all the time for himself?

Despite his inherently realist ideals, he always had a fondness for writing. He may have stopped every now and then for weeks, months, or even years; but he will always pick the pen up again and quell it with ink that illuminates upon his presence. Admittedly, he wished his eyesight hadn't degraded so early in his life, but he treats himself with fashionable eyewear as a silver lining. He has at least a few fancy pairs.

With his age, he deserves good things in life: He has grown a liking to things such as fashion, food, and other commodities; which are often associated with the youth rather than older people like him. Though, he knows what he's doing, especially with that closet full of academia-styled garments. Intricacy is his specialty, and shades of blue blend with the grays of his hair that he fails to hide.

Tea wasn't something he liked at first, especially when he was young – However, coffee wouldn't be suitable for his declining health, and he needed an alternative. It took him a long time, but he began to see the enjoyment after a while, and now owns packs of varied tea flavors stemming from the different locations that he has visited. His face now scrunches in disgust if he even takes a sip of coffee, and wonders how he liked it in the first place.

Despite his age, he is NOT a frail man; far from it. He can bike, he can hike, and he holds an impressive amount of stamina for someone on the brink of an elderly pass. It makes sense though, he travels the world in search of grand inspiration for his work, but it doesn't mean that he's a risk-taker. He values his life, and would rather not inconvenience himself with the "thrills" of the world that could endanger him; it doesn't mean he hasn't gotten himself into dangerous scenarios though.

Now, while it's beneficial for a writer to establish a consistent theme for mastery, Cyalm prefers to be explorative. He feels as though sticking to a set genre is suffocating, and would rather garner insight from the subjects of each genre and discover his own preference: Under the condition that he doesn't touch horror. He's squeamish to it, but he may find fascination from the macabre.

Ironically, his favorite genres are the unconventional: Fantasy, Fairytales – Tales of olden adventures from the unimaginable. At first glance, it seems unlike him to consider such "childish" themes with his contrasting mindset, but it is simply one of the many wonders as a creator; you find fascination from everything around you, and it a valiant mission to experience a world that is never possible in your own.

And he doesn't JUST write, his endeavors won't stop at only pen work: He can illustrate in case he needs a visual for his imagination, he can sew in the event of unwanted damage on his clothes – It's less of a hobby and more of a skill for conveniences sake, but it gets the job done. He has been mistaken as an artist on several occasions, some even wonder why he can't just utilize both, but Cyalm's heart is truly for writing at the end of the day.

★—————★

As I finish this off I realized it's already 1:16 AM and as such I will now begin my slumber 💤 I hope my headcanons serve you well though!

beautiful work - ⁉️

[cheesysoup-arlo]

Cady’s Cousin (pt.3)

(pt. 1)/(pt. 2)/(pt. 4)

*beep beep* you hear someone honking outside “that must be Damian” Cady says grabbing her backpack “oh ok I’ll be right there I left my headphones in my room” you say quickly going to your room to grab your headphones then running down stairs and getting in the backseat of Damian’s car. “Heyyy (y/n)” “hi Damian” “ok so we’re gonna pick up Janis then heading to the school and making sure you have your schedule then meet up with the rest of the group” Cady says buckling up in the front seat “sounds good to me” you say buckling up

You guys got to Janis’ house and Damian honked his horn. It took about 3 minutes before Janis clumsily stumbled out her front door and to the car “hi” Janis said with an awkward smile as you two made eye contact “hey” you said with a smile on your face as she sat next to you

You guys get to the school and Cady takes you straight to the office telling the others you’ll be back in a minute. “Hello excuse me miss?” Cady says trying to get the lady at the desk’s attention “oh hello dear do you need help with something?” The lady asks “yes my cousin in new here and I just wanted to make sure she has a schedule and that all of her credits transferred from her old school” “oh I can check that right now, what’s you name dear?” The lady asks you “(y/n), (y/n) heron” “ah yep you’re right there and all your credits seem to all be in order, would you like me to print out your schedule now?” “Yes please” Cady answers for you. The lady gives you your schedule and you and Cady head over to the rest of the group to hang out before school starts. “Hey we’re back” cady says enthusiastically “good morning here are your drinks” Regina says handing each of you your cups “thank you Regina” you say sitting down next to Janis who is sketching and drinking her coffee with headphones on not paying attention. You lean on her shoulder trying to get a glance at her sketchbook, accidentally starling her “AH OH MY GOD” “oh um sorry I didn’t mean to startle you” you say feeling really bad and scooting away a little “fuck sorry I didn’t mean to scream like that” she says taking off her headphones “it’s my fault, don’t apologize, I should’ve tapped you before invading your space” you say feeling like an idiot “it’s ok…do you want to see what I was drawing?” she asks hoping you’ll say yes “oooo yes I’d love to” you say scooting close to her again, she shows you some of her more recent projects. While you two were talking the rest of the group was observing you two from a small distance. “You guys are seeing this right?” Regina said with a small laugh “if you’re referring to Janis being a dorky lesbian then yes I see it” Damian says smiling a little “you know (y/n) isn’t normally this close with people, she normally keeps a decent amount of physical distance but this, this is definitely new” Cady adds to the conversation. You and Janis are practically in your own world, laughing and talking about her different art pieces and the inspiration behind them “wait so you’re telling me that you made this based off a Kids cartoon you were watching while high as fuck?” You say looking at a very colorful detailed drawing that had some embroidery on it “yeah and surprisingly I didn’t stab myself making it” Janis says laughing a bit then making eye contact with you for a few seconds before you both turned away, you looked at your hands and Janis looked up at the sky “Hey (Y/n) what classes did you get?” Regina asks and you hand her your schedule “ooo yay we all have the same home room, break, and lunch this year” Gretchen says looking over Regina’s shoulder at your schedule Gretchen already had everyone else’s schedule memorized since they all got their schedules over break. You and Janis join the rest of the group “Oh damn English first period, I’m so sorry for you” Damian says with a hand on your shoulder “I have English first period too, who’s her teacher?” Janis asks “Ms. Barnes? Is that the new teacher Ms. Norbury was talking about?” Cady asks Aaron “yeah, it’s actually her first year teaching from what I’ve heard” Aaron says

STUDENT: (Y/N) HERON. 12TH GRADE. SCHEDULE

HOMEROOM: ROOM 1802

(SHARON NORBURY)

PERIOD 1: ENGLISH 12 ROOM 708

(HAILEY BARNES)

PERIOD 2: STATISTICS A-B ROOM 370 (SHARON NORBURY)

BREAK: A

PERIOD 3: STUDY HALL 407

(BRIAN JOHNSON)

PERIOD 4: THEATER PERFORMANCE 1900

(LINDSEY CATER)

LUNCH: A

PERIOD 5: VISUAL ART ADVANCED 1706

(MAZELY JONES)

PERIOD 6: HISTORY 12 ROOM 1204

(HAROLD BAKER)

“Art and theater, that’s the gayest thing I’ve seen since Damian” Regina half joked “we literally have every other class together plus break and lunch, I guess you’ll be seeing me a lot” Janis said with a laugh “that’s honestly really cool, I’ll have someone fun in at least half my classes” you say with a wink

*ring* *ring* “well that’s the bell let’s head to homeroom” Cady says with a smile putting on her backpack and holding Regina’s hand while you all walk to class, you and Janis are in the back of the group walking close to each other but both focused on your phones, you’re texting your friend from back home and Janis is looking at what yarn to buy for her new project. Once you guys get to homeroom the group decided to sit together until they inevitable get separated for talking too much. “Good Morning class, happy Monday, My name is Mrs. Norbury and I will be your home room teacher this year, I was just informed we have a new student here from Florida so everyone please welcome (Y/N) and be kind to her” Mrs. Norbury says “thank you Mrs. Norbury” you say a little awkward Cady kindly puts her hand on your shoulder to comfort you. The class goes by pretty quickly. “So we’ll see you guys after this class, meet at the tree as usual?” Janis asks “yeah I’m so glad we all have A break and lunch this year” Cady says with a smile then gives you a hug “see you later (Y/N)” “bye cads, bye guys” you say before turning to Janis “follow me” Janis says sticking out her hand for you to grab and you do. You to get to class and sit next to each other in the back of the class. The teacher passes out a get to know you worksheet which you finish quickly then pull out your sketchbook to doodle. You’re doodling for like 10 minutes when you feel a light tap on your shoulder, it’s Janis you look at her a little confused then she shows you her sketchbook, it’s a small sketch of the friend group and to your surprise you see an in progress sketch of yourself. This causes you to blush a little, you’re not exactly sure why but you face definitely felt warm and there was definitely butterflies in your stomach “woah that’s really cool” you say quietly “thank you” Janis says turning away quickly, was Janis- no she couldn’t be blushing from such a simple compliment. The rest of class is pretty quiet with you two showing each other progress from your sketches. Class ended and you went to your next class saying good bye to Janis. Math went quickly and before you know it, it was break so you head to the tree from this morning to meet with the rest of the group. “So how’s everyone’s first day of senior year going so far?” Aaron asks “good, really chill” says Janis “for me it’s been going by really fast but it’s fun” you say “oh my goodness I can’t believe how easy today has been” Gretchen says with a sleepy Karen leaning on her “honestly a lot more boring than I expected” Regina says fixing her hair “I’m having an amazing day, that cute theater boy that I’ve been talking to has 4 classes with me” Damian says really happy “ooo ok Damian” you say hyping him up a bit “I am not having fun, I want to go home” Karen says leaning more into Gretchen “aw Karen what’s wrong?” Regina asks concerned “someone called her stupid because she asked what day it was when it was written on the board” Gretchen says holding Karen close “don’t listen to them Karen, they don’t know you, you’re incredibly smart and amazing, ok?” Janis says upset, Karen smiles a little very appreciative of Janis caring so much. You almost smile at how defensive Janis got for Karen seeing this caring side of her melted your heart in the best way. The break ended and you headed to study hall with Janis since none of your teachers were crazy enough to give you homework on the first day you and Janis talked quietly in the back about the different types of art she liked and how she does a lot of mixed media art. Every time you talk to Janis about art it feels like you two are the only two people on earth and like time stop. When the period ended she decided to walk you to theater since her class was in the same direction. Though you haven’t known her that long Janis made you feel really special, it was weird you felt like you didn’t need to put your walls up to protect yourself, you were just you. Exchanging goodbyes and saying you’d see each other at lunch. Theater was fun and easy, you played a name game

you played a name game so everyone could introduce themselves and then a few other games. The bell rang. Lunch time!

The cafeteria was honestly kind of chaotic but you ended up spotting Cady’s red hair very easily. You sat across from Cady knowing Regina would be siting next to her “hey cads” “hi (y/n) how were your classes?” “Good, how about yours?” “Eh pretty boring” Regina, Gretchen, and Karen come over giggling about something “I’m gonna go get cheese fries does anyone else want anything while I’m up?” Regina says “water please” you say and she gives you a nod “hmm i don’t know surprise me?” Cady says with a shrug. Regina leaves Gretchen and Karen follow as Damian and Aaron come over “no dude I’m telling you sports are way less complicated than that” Aaron says trying to convince Damian to watch some sport game with him “hey Damian where’s Janis?” You say a little worried “oh she’s in the art room she wanted to ask Ms. Jones if she had some yarn Janis could use” “oh ok…is she coming to lunch?” “Yeah she should be back in like 5? minutes” a few minutes later Regina, Karen, and Gretchen come to the table then Janis comes over and sits next to you taking one of your chips “Hey!” You say moving your chip bag away from her and she laughs “what you can’t share 1 chip with me?” Janis jokes “I can but you could’ve at least asked silly” you say laughing a bit “ok after school we should totally go to Regina’s house” Karen said “oh absolutely, my mom said that she misses you guys” Regina say.

Art class goes the same as all of the other classes you’ve had with Janis but this time you paint it’s really good quality paint especially since it’s from the school. You and Janis have been close all day. “Alright last class of the day, have fun” Janis says “you too, see you at Damian’s car?” You say “yeah see you later” she gives your hand a small squeeze then heads off to her class. You were definitely blushing from that, ugh this girl has only been your friend for 3 days but this felt different a good difference.

(Monday 2:00pm) fruit loops

Regina👛: y’all wanna go swimming? Today has been pretty warm and as you all know my pool is heated plus there’s a jacuzzi so like if you don’t want to go in the pool we could just chill

Aaron🧍‍♂️: I’m down I’m so glad you decided to keep swimsuits for everyone at your place

(Y/N): um I don’t have mine I’d be down to just go in my bra and the shorts I keep in my bag

Cads🦁: I have an extra one you can wear if you want (y/n)

Gretchen🌷: omg Regina that’s a great idea

Karen💕: 👙👙👙

Damian🌟: ooo absolutely I love a good swim at the George house

Gretchen🌷: Janis?

Damian🌟: she’s probably asleep or in the middle of a sketch with her phone on silent

(Monday 2:15pm) fruit loops

Janis👾: hey y’all sorry I was in the middle of a really good art jam but I’m totally down for a swim

Damian🌟: HA see I was right!!! do I know my best friend? or do I know my best friend?

Regina👛: ok ride arrangements for the ride to my house. Cady, Gretchen, and Karen in my car then the boys and single gays in Damian’s car

Janis👾: WTF BRO

(Y/N): damn 💀 no need to call us out like that

Bell rings and you head to Damian’s car. Aaron is already sitting in the front so you and Janis get in the back “let’s go queers it’s pool time” Damian pulls into Regina’s driveway shortly after Regina and everyone heads inside.

A/N: I couldn’t figure out how to end this one lol but here’s what I think their lunch table seating arrangement looks like also finally so cute Janis x reader moments lol ALSO LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANT TO BE TAGGED WHEN I POST NEW PARTS OF THE STORY IVE SEEN OTHER PEOPLE DO IT AND NOW I WANT TO LOL

[decks-writing-blog]

Free Them Chapter 1/3: The Hole in the Simulation

Summary: Gordon frees the AI from the simulation.

[A/N] Another fic I finished writing like 2 months ago but didn't have time to edit and upload because I was busy with Halloween stuff. Here it finally is though. Also, I'm sure people have done Aperture AU's with the HLVRAI cast before but this is my take on the idea.

~

“I believe you.”

It was barely more than a whisper but it had Gordon flinching anyway. He spun his desk chair around to confront the intruder.

Doug Rattmann. His gaze averted, he stood in front of Gordon’s cubicle, a steaming cup of coffee in his thin hands.

“Huh? What?”

“I believe you,” Doug repeated.

Gordon wasn’t in the mood for company but he wasn’t quite frustrated enough to be rude about it either. “Uh… thanks. What do you believe me about exactly?”

“The AI in the test simulation you played. You said they’re alive and thinking and feeling. I believe you.”

In hindsight, he couldn’t have possibly been referring to anything else. Since finishing it, the amount of times Gordon had argued with his co-workers had been rather high. It’s all anyone talked about with him anymore. Doug believing him wasn’t surprising. Rumor had it he thought that the Companion Cubes were alive. Still though, it was nice to be believed for a change.

“It makes sense,” Doug continued. “We have all those brain scans for the GLaDOS project and the simulation used them create its characters, right? That’s what I’d heard anyway.”

“Yeah, that’s true. Borrowing them took some convincing but we did it.” As head of the simulation project, using those scans had been Gordon’s idea. The plan was to create as realistic a digital world as possible so having the simulation model it’s most prominent NPC’s off of real human brain data made sense, right?

The ‘little’ prank his coworkers had played on him by telling the simulation to treat the world like a violent video game and even directly putting the Resonance Cascade in had helped with that by really pushing the limits of it. But that didn’t mean Gordon was happy about it. It was supposed to have just been a friendly gameified workweek at Black Mesa, mostly focused on interacting with the world and the NPC’s in it. But violent or not, the simulation had still modeled the main NPC’s off of real brain data and it had done a better job of it than Gordon had predicted even if the others didn’t believe him about that. They hadn’t talked to any of the Science Team or Benrey so they didn’t know.

Doug shifted his hold on his coffee mug as his eyes darted to the opposite side of Gordon’s cubicle, never once resting on Gordon directly. “So the AIs basically have their own little brains. The others say the simulation isn’t that advanced yet and that proof of that is the fact that we’re nowhere close to ready to put Cave’s brain into a GLaDOS machine yet. But making a brain is different than uploading one. The AIs are alive but they’re trapped. You should free them.”

Gordon had thought about doing something with the simulation a few times. Find a way to keep it running even despite his coworkers rightful objections over how much power that took. He’d even been thinking about taking it to Cave Johnson himself because he might sign off on the idea even just to see if anything happened if the simulation was allowed to run indefinitely. The main external thing making him hesitate had been the chance that Cave Johnson might decide to shut it down entirely. He was known for being an asshole just for the sake of being one sometimes. But ‘freeing them’ didn’t exactly describe that. “What do you mean ‘free them’?’

“Give them a way to interact with the world. The real one. Or… what we all believe to be the real world. Who knows if it is in actuality? I’m not sure how. You have much more experienced with the simulation than I. But I’m sure that they are trapped and that you can help them if you try.”

Listening to what Doug Rattmann had to say when it came to anything touching on what was reality or not, maybe wasn’t wise. But despite all his eccentricities, he didn’t get his position at Aperture out of luck or nepotism. He was at least as smart as anyone else here, probably more so given all the, ‘you must be crazy’s he no doubt had to deal with while on his way to his current position. Something Gordon now had a small taste of with being called ‘crazy’ for believing his AI friends were real. … Maybe Doug was right and the Companion Cubes were sentient too. A thought to chew on later. First came this ‘free them’ idea.

“I’ll think about it, I guess. And if I come up with a way to ‘free them’ or whatever, I will.” Assuming it was reasonably possible to do anyway.

“Good. Good.” Doug nodded. “I hope to meet the AIs if ever given the chance.”

“Uh, I’ll keep you up to date on them then.” If for no other reason than Gordon appreciated being believed finally.

Conversation apparently done, Doug turned and left. No ‘goodbye’ or where to reliably find him for the promised AI updates. Oh well. Doug was made his way around the labs fairly often so no doubt Gordon would run into him again eventually.

~

Dr. Coomer had said Gordon’s suit had a hole in it that he’d wanted to crawl through. Scared out of his mind – it had all felt so real – at the time, Gordon typically tried not to think too much about it. The hand that had been cut off was even the same one he was missing in real life – supposedly not planned by his coworkers – so it had brought back a lot of that old turmoil. (In real life, he thankfully didn’t have a gunhand but instead a prosthetic, high-tech and made by Aperture so not exactly normal but a more proper hand nonetheless.) Which was why it had taken him so long to finally come back to considering the words themselves, brought on by Doug’s suggestion.

The ‘hole’ Dr. Coomer had been talking about hadn’t been in the one the HEV suit. Crawling into Gordon’s virtual body wouldn’t have brought him any closer to the real world. No the hole could only be referring the hole in the simulation itself that allowed Gordon to access it. So in theory all Gordon had to do was create some more holes, ones that could be ‘crawled through’ to reach the real world.

Far easier said than done but this was Aperture Science. They did what they must because they could for the good of everyone. In this case, specifically for the good of Gordon’s AI pals. Aperture was also an expert in all things robots. A whole big team of people were literally working daily on creating a giant robot that would be in charge of the whole facility. Gordon was not looking forward to when it was finished and Cave Johnson’s brain was put into it as was the plan, but it did result in there being lots of robot resources around. Making robots an obvious thing to consider.

All he had to do was make some robot bodies that could hopefully house the AIs and hook them up to the simulation so his friends could crawl into them. It wouldn’t be easy but was well within his capabilities. The hard part would be the physical aspect, actually building the robots.

The models around the lab currently were too limited. Neither of the kinds of turrets could go anywhere under their own power – not that Gordon would trust the Science Team in turret bodies anyway given how trigger happy they all were. And the cores weren’t complete yet and thus their railings weren’t done being built, and even when they were, they’d only be in certain places. Gordon needed to make robot bodies that moved entirely under their own power. Making them look human and like their intended recipient's model from the simulation was tempting but he did not have the skills to pull something like that off. Nor did the facility have the means to easily build such parts anyway. He had to work with what was available.

Thus ultimately what he ended up with was a design for a larger core with arm and leg attachments. With help from the Robot Assembly Department he even got it built. It wasn’t the most elegant thing in the world but it would do especially as a test of his ‘hole in the simulation’ theory.

Telling people what he was doing got him more ‘are you crazy?’ looks and even a few comments but the simulation project was his baby so he was free to do with it whatever he wanted. Unless someone above him stepped in and interfered anyway but if need be he could probably find a way to frame this as being good for the company too. Thankfully no one seemed inclined to try that route. Thus he had help hooking the robot’s empty ‘brain’ up to the simulation before strapping himself in as well.

Naturally it dropped him in front of the Chuck-E-Cheese. Next to him was the empty robot, a copy of his player model because that was the quickest to implement. Based off how he looked in real life but low poly, it had a weird and creepy vibe to it. Getting the graphics to look realistic and/or pretty for this project wasn’t high priority yet and thus readable had been the only thing they’d gone for. He quickly turned away and made his way into the restaurant, leaving it out there for now.

Nervous about what he could say to the team, he hadn’t run the simulation since the video game had completed. As a result, everything was exactly how he’d left it. The birthday party decorations were still up and his pals were seated around the table. … Mr. Coolatta was missing though. Gordon could’ve sworn he’d been in the corner. But it had been a several months, misremebering such a small detail wasn’t out of the question.

The team of course wouldn’t know it had been months since last they’d interacted. To them, Gordon would’ve just left and come back after only a few minutes. Thus it wasn’t surprising Dr. Coomer stood to greet him with a smile as he reached them but that didn’t stop it from feeling weird. By all rights, the three of them should be angry with him for abandoning them so long. But they didn’t know and thus weren’t. Hopefully if they ever found out how long it had been, they wouldn’t mind.

“Hello, Gordon! Did you get my message?”

“I did, yeah.” It had come to him in the moments he was being drawn out of the simulation. Something that shouldn’t have been possible. Which had made it the final nail in the coffin for convincing him that these AI’s had gained self-awareness. “And uh… I think I might have something better than putting you in a different video game.”

“So this is a video game then?” Bubby asked as he stood too.

Admitting it at this point wouldn’t hurt since he had a solution… hopefully. “Yeah. It’s uh… it’s a video game. Or maybe more accurately it’s a simulation that was told to host a video game inside itself so it made a video game world out of its given assets.” Including creating more when such was needed, like the aliens and the Chuck-E-Cheese. How it had come up with said Chuck-E-Cheese was still a mystery. But that was more proof that this project had gotten more complex than intended.

“I guess that makes sense,” Tommy said. “But… that means… that means we’re not real, right? You’re the only one who’s real.”

“Uh… I think you guys are real. I mean, something existing only in a digital space doesn’t mean it’s not real, right? You exist in the computer. All my thoughts are electric pulses in my brain. You’re thoughts are the same just with less organic matter involved.”

“I think, therefore I am,” Dr. Coomer said. “What is your idea though? How are you going to make the fact that the world we exist in depends entirely on how long you’re willing to leave it running for, better?”

“Right, yeah, that. It’s why I’m here.” Despite the reasonable amount of confidence he’d had coming in, he was suddenly not so sure anymore. This was the reason he’d avoided coming back. How did you tell someone that their world, everything they knew, was just a test for a bigger project? “First though I should say that I’m not a theoretical physicist, that was a lie for the game. I actually work almost entirely with computers. I kinda made this simulation, with help but… I was in charge of most of it.”

“You’re God then?” Bubby interrupted, not sounding terribly impressed.

“Not really. I created the program and gave it stuff to work with but it put it all together, procedural generation and all that. So if anything, I created the god that created you. But anyway that means I’m basically an expert on it. Despite that, I don’t know for an absolute fact that my idea will work. It’s worth a try ‘cause it might but don’t get your hopes up too high yet. Now that you’ve been warned though, I guess there’s nothing else to do but try it, huh? Follow me.”

Without waiting for a response, he turned and led the way back outside. Out here it was more obvious than ever they were in a simulation. The parking lot surrounding them extended all the way to the horizon. The game had ended after all, the simulation continued but it wouldn’t keep building the game unless told to resume doing so.

The robot’s empty model stood a few few away from the entrance, still creepy as ever. If this worked Gordon would insist a different model be used for the next ones.

“Another you?” Tommy asked as they gathered in a semi-circle around it.

“No. It just looks like me because it’s the model that was easiest to implement for this test. Its not even the same kind of entity, I altered it quite a bit. Think of it as a hole in the simulation. There’s an empty robot on the other side. I’m hoping you can use this as a gateway to that robot and thus uh… be free of the simulation.”

“There’s only one,” Bubby said. “You expect us to share a robot body or something?”

“No. I only made one because I’m not sure if it’ll work. If it does, I’ll make more for everyone else. But uh… I guess that means you guys have to decide who gets to try it first.” In hindsight, maybe Gordon should’ve just made three of them. Only freeing one from the simulation when the other two were right here was uncomfortable to say the least.

“If this works, will Sunkist get a robot doggy body too?” Tommy asked.

“Yeah, I could probably do that.” Gordon hadn’t given any real thought to Sunkist before, too focused on his friends’ freedom – though could he really call them friends when their relationship was based on a lie? But it should be doable.

“Okay. Be sure to make her perfect. I’ll go later because I want to go with her. So you two could um… play rock-paper-scissors for this one.”

“On guard Bubby!” Dr. Coomer snapped around to face him, raising his hands, ready for the duel.

With a shrug, Bubby complied. “Rock, paper, scissors,” they said in unison. Bubby landed on rock and Dr. Coomer, paper. “Damn it. Best two out of three.”

“You’re on!”

“Rock, paper, scissors,” they said in unison again. This time Bubby landed on paper and Dr. Coomer scissors. How he did it when his model shouldn’t be able to make that gesture was a mystery. But if anyone could figure out how to cheat in a more complex hand gesture from within the game, it would be him.

Stepping back, Dr. Coomer raised his fist in the air. “Victory!”

Bubby crossed his arms with a small huff. “Whatever, cheater. I don’t wanna be a fucking guinea pig anyway.”

Dr. Coomer turned to face the empty player model. “How do I step in?”

“I was kinda hoping you’d know since you’re the one who tried it with me.”

“Hmm… I guess I did, huh? There’s no way it would’ve worked with you though, would it?”

“I doubt it. At best you would’ve just broken the equipment I use to connect to the simulation.” It was intensive enough that Gordon had to be eased out of it, woken from the pseudo-sleep state it put him in. So getting jerked out of it as the equipment broke wouldn’t have been great but it wouldn’t have seriously hurt him, it had failsafes in place after all. Not that that would’ve made it not scary. “But even if it hadn’t worked, you wouldn’t have been able to actually interact with the world in any way. You would’ve just been stuck in VR pod.”

“Another reason to be glad that plan failed then. But I guess there’s nothing else to do but to try with this. See you on the other side hopefully. You too Bubby and Tommy! Let’s’a go!”

Stepping towards it, Dr. Coomer lifted hand to touch its chest. At first just pressing against it but then with a little more effort, clipping into it. This ‘player��� entity had been altered to allow for this interaction, hopefully creating a passage through it into the robot on the other side but the model hadn’t been. It jerked and spamsed as Dr. Coomer pushed more of himself through. The blank face made it creepy and unsettling to watch. Gordon forced himself to not look away until Dr. Coomer was entirely within it. A few seconds later, the model stilled.

“Did it work?” Bubby took a step closer.

“Something happened,” Tommy said, mirroring Gordon’s thought. Something had happened, whether that something was it working was hard to tell currently.

“I’ll uh… have to disconnect and see. So I’ll be… not right back but back as soon as I can.”

“Okay, see you soon, Mr. Freeman.”

~

As always it was like waking from a nap. Never a restful nap though because it wasn’t a restful experience most of the time. The experience allowed him to feel and even smell everything. Even if it wasn’t quite as strong as real life currently that still included the pain of having his hand cut off and the stench of rot. They hadn’t implemented taste yet but they were getting there.

Once he was finally pulled fully back into reality, the release sequence began. Starting with the helmet encasing his entire head. As the most important part, the computer took it off for him, keeping his hands strapped to his sides. Once it was off though, he could finally see the pod around him. Unfortunately he could smell it too.

Supposedly the Cryo team had sent over only pods no one had died in but all three of them had a weird smell that Gordon’s team could never quite banish. Even if he couldn’t tell what it was exactly, it never failed to make him feel unwell. He should’ve insisted harder they create their immersive VR pod from scratch. They’d had to replace most of the internals anyway. But now that they’d put that work in, he couldn’t exactly justify it.

Thankfully because it wasn’t cryosleep, just deep VR integration, it took only a minute or so before the lid was allowed to pop open, letting in fresh air. Unstrapping himself, he pushed it the rest of the way open and stepped out into the test room.

Small and circular, it had contained only the pod and it’s backup on the other side of the room. Said backup pod had been gutted and messily altered to connect to the robot’s empty ‘brain’. That robot had been facing him when he’d gone in. Now though, it was facing away, seemingly studying the nest of bundled wires and cables that had become of the pods inner workings. Which could only mean that it had worked, right?

Gordon took a step closer. “Uh… Dr. Coomer?”

The large core with arms and legs turned face him. Its eye, capable of being any colour was set to deep green; a fitting colour for Dr. Coomer. “Hello, Gordon!” The voice and tone was exactly the same.

“Did it work?”

“Is this the real world and not another layer of the simulation?”

“This real.” Probably anyway.

“Then I would say that it did work. And Gordon, it is beautiful!” The panels on the core body were designed for emoting, allowing him to widen his eye in awe. “I have never seen anything more beautiful! I can not… there are no words to express how grateful I am for this experience, Gordon. Thank you.”

“Wow. I’m… glad it worked.” Gordon should’ve thought of this a long time ago. He’d have to thank Doug for ultimately leading him to the idea whenever he next came around. “Wow, I actually did it. How you feeling? Everything working like it’s supposed to and stuff?”

“I assume so.” He turned to the side and did a little back and forth march. There was a slight wobble to his stride but nothing egregious. At worst mild adjustments might be needed to improve his balance.

“Good. Good. Let’s go um… I’ll show you around and do some tests and stuff.” Introduce him to people so they could finally see what Gordon meant when he’d told them the AI’s had gained sentience. While also making sure everything worked as intended.

“What about Bubby and Tommy, Gordon? Will you go back for them?”

“Of course. I’ll make some more robots for them now that we know for sure it works.” They’d all be free in no time. … Or maybe not ‘no time’ but soon.

~

Next Chapter

[cybiirz]

ೃ⁀➷ DAYLIGHT ROBBERY

Gepard x Gn!Reader

Sypnosis : A renowned thief of Belobog. That’s what you were. What people didn’t know was that you actually did it for a good cause, yet they were too clouded by their sense of judgement to even think of your reason behind this. Seems a certain blonde haired Captain was no different. At each and every turn he is always there, yet at each and every turn you managed to wriggle your way out of his grasp. Whilst it visibly annoyed him, you were also unaware of the fact he appreciated a challenge. And if a challenge meant having to keep an extra eye on you at all times, well. He’d be willing to swim with sharks to do so…

WC : 1.9k

Warnings : None! The reader is a bit playful, you’ll see what I mean and there is a hint of a little crush between the two but not confirmed. Bit of Sampo is mentioned. Kind of fools in love..? Might make a part 2, only if requested to. Also, I made a minor modification, this takes place before the Stellaron was “defeated” so when the Overworld and Underworld were not yet connected.

Read part 1 || part 2 || part 2.5 || part 3

Virtuous. That was certainly one word used to describe yourself. Well, a word that people of the Overworld would use to describe you. For context, you were not a citizen of the Underworld, far from in fact. Instead, you were merely an above average person who roamed the Belobog streets. That’s what many others would say about you at a first glance and to be truthful, they were not necessarily wrong.

But they were not necessarily right either. As an Overworld being, you had privilege compared to more than average, which is why you were recognisable from a glance. While you were not really nobility per se, you were certainly rich. Your parents were involved with Cocolia quite a fair amount. They had worked underneath her wing for as long as even they could remember as she helped them climb the ranks. However, the higher they progressed, the less attention that was given to you became more frequent.

So you would typically expect for a child of such high classed parents to have strong beliefs against the Underworld and stay in that richie-rich bubble, would you not? Well, you can guess where this is leading up to. Of course you weren’t. Whilst you did grow up in luxury, many stories of the Underworldians were simply hard to believe in your eyes. So once you managed to get involved with a certain woman, who strangely enough looked quite manly and had blue-ish hair, that woman had led you down the furnace core towards the lower part of the city. Strangely enough, she had disappeared the second you stepped onto the dark slate flooring which left you to explore the place yourself.

And after delving deeper into the rumoured horror town, you had managed to learn that everything here was in fact, well, much better than that. Although a few scowls were given towards you, you were determined to learn more about the place. That was about a few months ago. Now you sat here with the children of Boulder Town as you played a game of Hide and Seek with them.

Now some people may think, what about your parents, your friends up above? Your parents were too busy to really pay attention to you which caused your early maturity. And most of your friends up above were bland and almost snobby sometimes. Apart from a few exceptions. But now you have grown to love the Underworldians more than anything, almost like family.

Which is what led to where you were today.

You were currently sat in a dainty little café, fairly hidden from the central area of Belobog. You sat with a cup of warm coffee on a small plate as you threw one of your legs to cross over the other. You flickered your gaze around the place discreetly before hearing a buzz from your pocket. Quickly fishing out the said device, you brought the phone up to your ear as you took a sip of the nearby liquid.

“You ready?” Asked a somewhat sneaky voice on the other end of the line. After gently removing the cup from your lips and placing it down, you stood up and plucked your bag from your chair and slung it across your torso.

“When am I not?” You answered, almost as teasing as the other voice. The line gets cut off as you place the phone into a secure pocket. All of a sudden, an object rolling on the floor could be heard as a few citizens turned their heads. Before anyone could register what was happening, you placed a mask onto your face as the object then exploded into a cloud of smoke.

The few people began panicking and threw themselves to the floor, covering their noses and coughing their lungs up. Your shoes clacked against the tiles, but the sound was blocked out by the terrified wails of everyone else. Quietly, you managed to make your way behind the counter after seeing the cashier make a run for it outside. You began reaching up and stuffing everything that could fit into the large bag.

Whether that be cartons of milk, as many pastries as possible, simple coffee beans, sandwiches. Quite literally anything and everything. This was all to feed the Underworldians. You would do almost anything to give those people the treatment they deserved from the beginning. But once the smoke was visibly dying down, you leaped over the counter and made a run for it, clutching the strap of the bag as tightly as humanly possible. You did your best to blend in with the few citizens who were also bolting away. As you were about to exit the door, you suddenly collided with a metal material.

Rubbing your head as you stumbled back slightly, your eyes trailed up, only to spot the Captain of the Silvermane Guards standing right there in the flesh.

Great, fantastic even! You thought to yourself. See, the Captain, Gepard, and yourself were not to be considered friends. Like, at all. If anything, people could call you arch enemies. You were a wanted criminal in the Silvermane books, which only made Gepard keep his eyes peeled for you even more. He never knew who you really were, thanks to you wearing a mask at each “incident”. But you knew he hated your guts, he hated anyone who went against the laws that Belobog had created. And of course, stealing was one of the top 3. So just to tick him off even more, you had grown aware that he disliked humorous remarks made in serious situations. Which had led to you constantly teasing him during your meet-ups.

“Captain! So great to see you again. Can I interest you in our wide range of coffees?” You questioned the shockingly tall man in an innocent sounding voice as you gestured towards the menu. Before you could make another remark, he raised his weapon, which strangely enough seemed to be a guitar case, towards you, causing you to put your hands up and beside your head as you grew a shocked expression.

“This ends now, thief. Hand over every stolen item in that bag of yours, and I will bring you to the cell in which you belong,” The blonde haired man stated in a firm voice. He stood tall and straight, emphasising his superiority to you. You frowned as you placed your hand on your heart before speaking in a solemn tone.

“And here I thought we were good friends Captain Gepard. I expected better from you,” You replied as you wiped a fake tear from your eyes. He did not react and simply held the case higher towards your head.

“I do not have time for your games. Hand over the goods and do not make this difficult,” He spoke in that annoyingly firm and unwavering voice again. Rolling your eyes, you reached into the bag as you began to fish out one of the boxed up pastries before you paused.

“Hey Captain, you know what my favourite part of this job is?” You asked with a raised eyebrow. He merely breathed in response. You slowly took out the pastry and walked towards him as he became cautious of your movements. Time and time again, you had slipped from his grasp, but not anymore. Today would be the day where the newspaper would have a big flashy headline of your defeat. He kept the case close to him and gripped it tightly as you came closer.

Still holding the plastic box, you held it in front of you, as if offering the pastry to him with a bright smile. The captain just stared at the box, then you, and then at the box again. He made no move to open it or to smack it away. Letting out a slight huff of frustration, you began to open the box yourself.

“Always have to do everything by myself huh? Well no matter, it’s just a pastry. This is my favourite bit of the job you know, giving my one and only Captain the pastry he deserves for his hard work,” Your smile was now sickly sweet as he became more weary by the second.

“Stop with your nonsense. You’re coming with me,” He began making his way towards you as he pulled out a pair of handcuffs. You took the “you’re coming with me” as a proposal for a date and used that as mockery just to tick him off a little more.

“Such a shame, you just asked me out and here I have to miss our first date I guess. No hard feelings though,” You replied with a tone that feigned sadness and sorrow. Just as he was coming closer, the box began to rattle more.

And before the Captain could react to the shaking plastic, the pastry, which was supposedly a small piece of strawberry shortcake, blew up. Yep, a bomb encased in soft clay. But the smoke was not normal this time, no. It was sleeping gas, as the Captain had now begun to realise due to the effects.

His eyes slowly began to drift shut as his body became limp. He stood his ground as best he could but it was futile against the extremely strong substance. Eventually, he dropped the case and only held the handcuffs in one hand as he fell to his knee. He was breathing heavily which was a sight to see in itself. You raised your eyebrows momentarily at the sight in front of you. Well, he had his looks going for him that’s for sure.

Finally, the handcuffs fell from his hand as he propped himself up with one hand. The smoke encased the both of you, thankfully you were unaffected due to the mask planted securely onto your nose and mouth. But you kneeled down slightly and grabbed the Captain’s face in your hand as you forced him to look up at you. You let out a tut before speaking.

“So sad it has to be this way. I’ve certainly enjoyed getting to see you in such a state though, I must say Gepard. But i’ve bested you yet again dear, and it will always be that way. Don’t forget me now,” You practically whispered to him before leaving a mocking peck onto his cheek through the mask. Even more mockery. You weren’t even sure if he was fully registering your words as he seemed to be drifting in and out of consciousness.

You grabbed the handcuffs and brung his wrists together before tightly screwing the handcuffs onto them, leaving him defenceless, on his knees as he finally fell to the ground, blonde tussle of hair all over the place as the metal clanked.

This should certainly be a present for the rookies to find. You thought again. Suddenly, the sounds of footsteps against the stone pavement were evident as you swiftly ran out of the back door but not before taking one more glance at Gepard. Maybe one day he would catch you. But you knew for sure, it would not be any time soon…

Unbeknownst to you, during your little interaction with the Captain, he was still conscious enough to feel the material of your mask against his pristine skin, which only left him more flustered than he already felt in your annoyingly teasing presence. Safe to say, something would be clouding Gepard’s mind for a while, and it wasn’t the sleeping gas around him…

Author’s Note: Please please feel free to leave any requests as I would love to write all of your imagines and make you as happy as possible with them! Anyways, whoopee, my first fanfic actually posted. And of course it has to be with my favourite Belobog man. He’s just so idek how to explain it. I love my light haired men like, it’s indescribable how much I do. There’s just that element to them yk? Anyways, I seriously hope you enjoyed this and feel free to leave any requests at my front door!

[queer-reader-07]

ok time for me to be an aziraphale apologist / stan on main. because i am tired of how much shit he is getting.

1) i hate hate HATE the amount of people who keep insinuating that crowley is *more* in love with aziraphale than aziraphale is with crowley. did we watch the same show and read the same book??

did you not see aziraphale’s longing gazes that started *checks notes* literally before time? did you note watch as he got himself into precarious situations just so that he could be rescued by crowley and subsequently be asked out on a lunch date? did you not see aziraphale take any and every opportunity to simply touch crowley’s body? to just feel a little more closeness? he literally gave crowley holy water. if that isn’t love i don’t know what is.

yes, crowley shows his love for aziraphale very differently. for crowley it’s acts of service and that loving snark. but that doesn’t mean aziraphale doesn’t love crowley. they both love each other so so deeply and equally. they just love differently.

2) aziraphale is not a bad person for choosing to go to heaven.

i have talked about this in a few contexts before (eg how it makes sense from a religious trauma standpoint) but today i’m talking about it generally.

aziraphale did not choose heaven over crowley. he chose saving the world in the now, so crowley can be safe in the future. so that he and crowley might still have an earth to have a future on.

aziraphale still has faith that heaven can change for the better, and if it can be him doing the change why wouldn’t he want to take the opportunity? i don’t think you have to like his decision, but so many people are screaming “aziraphale bad!!!” and i just don’t get it.

the decision makes sense. it is so completely in character.

look. i understand being distraught or upset about the ending of season 2. i won’t pretend that i was happy about the ending. but i think a lot of people have forgotten how stories are structured. season 2 is the second act in a three act story. the final fifteen are the standard conflict that basically every three act story has.

but it was really shocking to see how many people went from loving aziraphale to just crapping on him because he made an in-character- understandable-in-the-context-of-his-past decision.

idk i just don’t think it makes sense or is fair to boil his decision down to “it’s out of character” or “he doesn’t love crowley as much” (don’t even get me STARTED on coffee theory) just because you didn’t agree with it.

aziraphale has flaws, but so does crowley. that’s what makes them such good and compelling characters. they aren’t black and white, bad and good. that’s the whole point of their characters and dynamic, they exist in the gray space.

[hornyhermitry]

Professional translations & public witch hunts

For starters: If you think "TL;DR, who cares, I ain't reading all that" and are incapable of processing words for a prolonged amount of time beyond 240 character clickbait, you are not entitled to an opinion on translation to begin with.

I will take sufficient time for this one.

General:

In recent weeks I've repeatedly had the misfortune of coming across public harassment and incited hate mobs towards Jujutsu Kaisen's manga translator.

There's hordes of anti-social harassers pushing for someone to get fired from a professional job - in which he works because he is equipped with the necessary qualifications - purely due to disliking occasional translation choices in a comic.

This behavior has reached levels of exaggeration and reality disconnect, it'd be funny if it wasn't so sad due to a real person's livelihood being attacked.

This is not normal and tolerable behavior. It is equal to drumming up a hate mob in front of a café and threatening some employee inside, throwing rocks at the window and demanding for a barista to get fired because you didn't like the coffee beans they chose, or sure, maybe because they put actual sugar instead of sweetener into your coffee.

This is not a normal and acceptable way to behave.

If you think it is, there is something deeply wrong with your perception of society and what's respectful conduct towards another human being. When you encounter another person, you act respectfully at the very least. Kind, ideally.

Feel free to imagine yourself at work, making a mistake and thousands of people starting to call, email, shitpost online and harass you over it, dragging you publicly, shouting on the parking lot for you to be fired. Please reflect on yourself.

Now:

This dude does comic translations.

He did not authorize biochemical weapons in a war. He did not pass a law to deport all migrants and close the borders. He did not accidentally kill someone during a surgery. He did not hack & rob the annual employee bonus' account.

He wrote a word you don't like in a comic.

Planet Earth to Werry hater: Please come back down to reality and dial it back a few notches. This is a non-issue. Whether he makes mistakes or not, this level of hate and harassment is ENTIRELY out of pocket.

Moving on to translations.

Translations/criticizing translations:

Opinions on translations are like assholes - everyone got one. But that doesn't mean you need to pull them out in public. And especially not that you have to shit into random people's lives with them.

I've been reading manga and playing games in private for 27 years. I speak 4 Western languages and A2.2 Japanese. I've been working in the international entertainment industry with a focus on Asian to Western markets for over a decade, including Chinese, Japanese & Korean.

A lot of my time at work is filled with liaising between East and West, internally as well as externally. In my career, I've spent a lot of years supporting and later on consulting on localization.

I know what it is like to be a fan, and I am fully aware of the work reality behind translation.

I'm also intricately aware of the difficulties one faces when interpreting (!) from a source language as abstract and contextual as Japanese to a spelled out language such as English, French, Spanish, German, etc.

You cannot do a 1:1 translation. The nature of these languages is so different, you have to decide on one of many ways to translate something. And oftentimes, the content is so vague with so few indicators, the only thing you can do is guess and hope for the best - unless you happen to hit a rare jackpot of a person who has a guide with additional info and is able to provide this within the short deadline you are left with.

Even the most basic words already illustrate this difference.

Look at the example of

元気ですか / げんきですか = Genki desu ka

Genki is an adjective, "desu ka" is a question particle similar to "is it".

Genki already has many similar variants in meaning: "lively; full of spirit; energetic; vigorous; vital; spirited"

It is commonly translated as "How are you?" but that is not what it literally means.

Since "Genki desu ka?" is commonly used after the initial greeting when meeting someone, "How are you" is the closest equivalent to it in EN, due to it's function and usual placement within a dialogue.

The literal translation would be "Energetic is it?", or "Lively is it?"

That is obviously is no proper English.

Adjusting for grammar, it could be changed to "Are you lively?" - but the "you" is already a "fictional addition" to the sentence, as the original JP has no adress like this.

And asking someone if they are "lively" is also out of place. So more changes are needed.

Further adjusted for "natural sounding" would be "Are you doing good?" which now has 2 additional made up words, to transfer the question from JP to EN - "you" and "good".

This sentence does not necessarily have to mean "Are you good/How are you?". If I tell you my aunt Emma sends her regards, and you reply "Ah. Genki desu ka?" the translation would be "Oh. How is (Emma) doing?/Is Emma doing good?" JP's grammar works without these precise indicators who is talking about whom and is highly contextual whereas - Western languages need those.

Concluding, depending on who is talking to one another, who was mentioned on a page before, etc. a simple "Genki desu ka?" can be anything from "How are you?" to "Is (Panda) doing good?".

There is no literal 1:1 translation possible. The languages are too different.

The reality of translation is unclear source material open to multiple interpretations, once you settle on an interpretation having another dozen options to decide on for the specific wording, then having to adjust that to character and spacing limitations and doing all that with little turnover time.

On top of that, official translations work with styleguides and glossaries.

There could e.g. be a kind of character bible with notes about all characters and their peculiar ways of talking and what character traits those convey and an instruction to use approach XYZ to convey that.

"Speaks in a very poetic way, very roundabout and meandering" which could e.g. lead to overhauling the literal translation to add "personality" based on that.

Going by "(O) genki desu ka?" suddenly "How are you?"for the "poetic trait" becomes "How has life been treating you?"

Again - at the end overhauled again to make room for character limits and such, so maybe it becomes "How fare you?"

This change could have been added not because this particular line offers the exact context, but it is rooted in a style instruction to work with a certain speech pattern/type for a character - since the JP indicators at another spot might not offer satisfactory EN translations, so you have to add the "personality" elsewhere.

Translations of ongoing works utilize glossaries and you cannot use new terms if there is already a term established and submitted. Else it would be a mess of e.g. Cursed Energy in Chapter 2, Jinxed Force in Chapter 25, Hex Flow in Chapter 112, Curse Power in Chapter 156, Hex Energy in Chapter 287, etc.

Even if some months or years in you think another translation would be better suited, you are obliged to keep consistency with previous mentions and cannot just change these.

This also means if you take over translation work started by someone else, you have to work with their groundwork and established rules and terms and cannot change them.

Official translations commonly aim to make a foreign work accessible to local readers. If there is a bunch of teenage characters going to school, they should be relatable to local teenagers. As a result, regional and current slang might be added to make it sound more natural whereas the JP might just have "informal" indicators but less variance in vocabulary. The goal of a translation is to make a work accessible to a whole new language audience, hence the focus lies on making it readable without a prior 8 year degree in cultural studies. Things get simplified or changed for that reason.

Usually translators for a work consult with each other what the difficulties translating are, what possible options are, and what each language will run with. These considerations take a lot of time.

Having fans work out occurences deviating from the OG and explaining the specifics behind is it AMAZING community content and something for the people passionate about a story and about learning more about a culture. But it's not needed for the average joe buying a comic at a gas station.

This kind of deep dive is fandom! Enjoy and share and get excited! Enrich each others lives and understanding of a story! It's one of the best things there is.

Finally, a translation has to be timely & approved. There are multiple people involved in this.

It is not on poor John alone to make all decisions as he fancies and send it straight to print after going rogue, but he works within the guidelines & constraints this jobs brings with it. It's his name on the page but there are a lot more people involved in the final result.

Publicly claiming things like a translator "brutally butchers" a story or "is incapable of doing a job" because in a sea of solid translations of a very vague source language, every few chapters there's a specific word deep fandom who spends all their free-time on this particular story would have translated differently, is wildly inappropriate.

Interpreting differently is not doing a wrong job.

People on social media love attention and shitstorms. You get one narcissist with a following pointing out a debatable translation in a snarky smartass way and everyone wants a piece of the smartass cake.

What I struggle with is how people who don't speak a second language & often barely speak their own language with literacy above elementary school, feel entitled to an opinion here. What makes you an expert on cross-cultural art interpretation? What makes you think your opinion holds any weight here? Oh you read a Tweet by s/o else? *clap*

What makes you think you have the right to go after another person's job for no reason other than spite and some internet gotcha over a comic?

If you really value the creation of near perfect translations that much, be the change you want to see in the world.

Learn another language. Get that degree. Get that job in animanga and do your best.

Or for a start, send a polite mail about your concerns to VIZ instead of starting a personal witch hunt for some guy doing his job.

[starstruckunknown-princess]

Wormwood - Frankie Morales x Reader

Wormwood (Artemesia absinthium) - Meaning: Bitterness, absence

Summary: Frankie has left again, and you're left to pick up the pieces.

Pairing: Frankie Morales x Reader

Word Count: 519

Warnings: ANGST, Non-dad!Frankie, themes of abandonment, anger, bitterness, reader is a deep sleeper but otherwise not physically described, photo in banner for vibes only!

Hello lovelies! Day 1 of my In Bloom Writing Challenge starting off with some Frankie angst, I kept it pretty short because I couldn't think of actual plot lol I like it better that way. Another of our Delta Force Hotties will make an appearance later this month, so stay tuned!

In Bloom Masterlist

Comments, Likes, Reblogs are ALWAYS appreciated! Thanks for reading <3

Your first clue that he is gone is the lack of warmth on his side of the bed. Getting up, you can see the holes where his things used to be. The nightstand all but cleared off. Bare hangers in the closet, his shampoo missing from the shower. 

Frankie’s gone again, and you should’ve seen this coming. You knew the nature of his work, how he would drop everything for the mission, how he’d be gone for unspecified amounts of time with no way to contact you, leaving you to fear the worst for days or weeks but it was all in the name of serving his country so you couldn’t exactly argue with him. 

You’d never been particularly patriotic, and the fact that the needs of the US military took priority over you, over everything, made sure you never would be. But this time was different. Frankie had retired, he’d promised he was done leaving. 

But his devotion to Santiago ran almost as deep as his devotion to his country. And again you couldn’t blame him for it without seeming insensitive and selfish. After everything they’d been through together, even though you didn’t know all the details, you knew that kind of shit bonded people for life. And you genuinely liked Santi, truly. You got along with him whenever he’d visit town and Frankie would insist he take the guest room instead of paying for a hotel. Those times you’d wake up to the smell of coffee in the morning and their deep laughs echoing up from the kitchen. It made your house feel warmer, more like a complete home. 

But Santi had texted Frankie about some kind of recon job in Columbia and for that amount of money, you knew he couldn’t say no. Even though you insisted you two were fine, that you got by, you didn’t need the cash. Frankie had just looked up at you with doubt in his big brown eyes and you knew you hadn’t convinced him. Who in their right mind turned down seventeen grand?

Even more poignantly — who in their right mind would ask a man as loyal as Frankie was to turn his back on his closest friend? 

Sometimes you hated how deeply you slept - you hadn’t heard him packing. Didn’t hear his old truck rumble to life or hear the key in the door. You weren’t able to hug him goodbye and beg him to stay safe, to come back to you. 

Part of you wanted so badly to grab your suitcase and bolt, go stay with friends out of town so that when he got back he would feel the panic and terror at finding the person he loved had disappeared. Ignore his calls, leave his texts on read, let him sweat about your whereabouts for once. But you couldn’t. You knew whatever you had together wasn’t worth throwing away for the sake of spite. 

So you dealt with the absence of his things, the absence of him, the same way you always did. You swallowed your bitterness, your pain, and learned to live with the ache. 

[maladaptive-jcb]

Chapter 1: Icebreaker

Jamie x female!reader fanfic

(fluff, safe for under 18)

Summary: Reader is an independent artist who lives on her own in a small town and meets Jamie, a musician, in an art studio where their budding relationship formed through shared interests of different forms of art.

Warning: There will be talks about trauma and PTSD from domestic abuse and dissociative episodes throughout the story.

A quiet groan. I can hear it from two seats away from where I’m sitting. It’s almost been a month since I started this painting class where I saw it opened two blocks away from my apartment a month ago. I thought it was a perfect way to ignite my old artistic passion again. Lucky for me, it's a budget studio class, which means I don't have to break my savings just to fill up some of my free time. I work at a local bookstore and currently renting a small apartment. I'm doing good, but not amazing while living as an independent girl in this town.

I hear another sigh coming from him. Jamie first came into class around the second week I started here. I remember it was a slow day in class. I was wondering if I should even be here in the first place until I heard footsteps coming in. The way he walked in with his tussled blonde hair and iridescent eyes captured my attention immediately. Ever since then, he never missed a class. I decided to stick around after all.

“Jamie…Jamie… What did I say?” Mr. Hayes, our art teacher stops behind him as Jamie is struggling with his work. “Always check the proportions. Sorry,” he says in a low tone voice. Subtle English accent. Disgruntled look is forming on his face as he tries fixing his painting with more acrylic. Mr. Hayes pats on his back with approval and goes along to check his other students.

He's not really the worst in class. I’ve seen his work, he did a lot of good paintings except that he hates small details and proportional work.

Should I help him more? I mean, we barely talk in class aside from the occasional “Hey,” from time to time. In fact, he barely talks to anyone in here.

He shoots up a look to me.

Shit.

I didn’t realize that I’ve been staring at him for a while.

“Y/n, you’re doing great just don’t forget to clean up your finishing touches this time,” Mr. Hayes distracted my train of thoughts. “I will. Thank you, Mr. Hayes,” I give him a quick nod. I've had such a great experience so far with Mr. Hayes. He'll find a way to make one-on-one teaching lessons feel so personal to you. He's also very patient with all of us considering most of his students came in with zero prior art knowledge. I think that’s why Jamie has improved so much in just a short period of time.

____

The morning is still early when the class ended and I'm now on a hunt for some caffeine to keep my day going. The café is just a five minutes walk down the road. It's called the Aroma Mocha. Since it's an hour away until my shift starts at the bookstore, I decide to have a brisk walk under the cool weather, taking it all in.

As I walk in, there are already five people in line ahead of me at the counter. I wait in line as I soak in the café’s inviting atmosphere. I see a few people inside with their quiet talks to each other. Another middle aged woman reading her book while sipping on a hot coffee. A dark haired teenage girl in the slightly hidden corner with headphones on while sipping on her cold drink in hand. I can't tell what it is but it makes me crave for an iced latte. In another corner, there's a tired college student staring straight into his laptop screen with the fast click-clacking sound of his hands on the keyboard. Just the right amount of calm and busy here, topped off with the aroma of freshly grinded up coffee beans filling up the air. It’s just such a nice morning to start. I've been observing everyone that I haven't noticed anyone getting in line behind me until…

“Y/n, right?”

I turn around and met with a tall lanky figure, silver rings on his fingers, blonde hair framing his cheekbones perfectly in the dim lights of the café.

“Oh yes. And you’re Jamie!”

He smiles. “Yep. Fancy meeting you outside the class.”

“I hope that’s not a bad thing.”

“Not at all. Pleased, really,” his eyes twinkles.

I don’t see the disgruntled, contorted face he always makes when painting in frustrations. He seems… sweet.

“Next!” The barista calls out to me.

“One iced latte, please…” I turn to Jamie. “…and whatever he’s having.”

“Coffee. Black,” he leans forward to respond. His subtle breath warm on my neck. “Thank you."

“You’re welcome,” I return his smile.

I’ve wanted to approach him so many times in class and chickened out. Crazy to think that this is the longest conversation we’ve ever had.

Our drinks were done at the counter after a few minutes. I grab both and hands his coffee. He takes it, fingers brush against mine.

“I’ll see you again, soon?”

“Yeah. See you again, y/n.”

He smiles and raises the cup of coffee thanking me again. I nod and quickly turns my face towards the floor hiding the warmth that's rising to my cheeks. With one last wave, I walk towards the door to leave.

“Wait!”

A surge of relief going through my body. Somehow I was hoping it wouldn't just end there.

“Do you have time to sit with me?” he asks.

I hold my wrist up and check the time on my watch. My shift is not starting until 40 minutes anyways. How long can it be to sit and talk with Jamie?

“If that’s okay,” a little hint of pleading in his voice.

“Yes, of course."

____

We sit across each other at a table near the big window. His long legs brush against mine from time to time. Now that I'm actually closer to him than before, I can see his blue eyes sparkling even brighter under the sunlight streaming through the window pane. He's a little quiet at first. His fingers knotted with each other around his warm cup of coffee. It's almost as if he's wondering what to talk about. Eventually, he tries to ask me more about myself. Trying to set aside the sudden surprise of actually sitting with a new person on my day, I let myself cool down and let the conversations flow on their own. His eyes wide, yet soft as he looks at me attentively every time I tell him little things about myself. I just thought it was just out of politeness but I notice that he's actually listening to me when he chuckles and nods along to my stories. It's like every word that came out of my mouth hung around the air and he's just absorbing them all in.

"You know it's very interesting to finally hear all about the teacher's favourite in class," a teasing tone in his voice.

“Oh, stop. But you know, I've wanted to talk to you in class for a while as well."

“Is that why you’ve been staring at me?” he smirks and takes a sip of his coffee.

My heart does a somersault. He noticed that?

“Oh… I uh,” my cheeks starting to feel a little warm.

He winks.

“So what brings you to the class anyway,” my attempt at changing the subject.

“Oh, umm…” Jamie purses his lips as if he's thinking about the question itself.

"I wanted to try something new in this town. I just moved here and happened to walk by the studio and… well here I am."

“I see. I’m guessing you came all the way here from…”

“London. Yes. The accent, I know,” he laughs. Hand brushing through his beautiful locks.

“I just needed a change. What about you?”

“Oh I’ve lived here for a while. Two years now. Trying to prove to my parents that I can be independent, you know?” I tell him, quickly brushing the question off.

He nods. “You’re working?”

“Yeah. Do you know Bookworm Shack? It’s a block away from here. In fact, I should be getting into my shift in like 15 minutes now.”

“Oh yeah, I’ve seen it. Come on, I’ll drive you,” drinking the last bit of his coffee before he gets up.

I didn’t have time to process it. I haven’t sat in a car alone with a man for so long. Not since-

“You’re coming?” his head tilts towards me and scanning my eyes, hoping for a hint of agreement to his plan.

“I guess, there's no harm in that. Thank you."

“The least I could do for that coffee,” he gives a friendly punch to my upper arm and grinning ear to ear. Every bit of his face lights up when he does it. It feels nice to see him in a more cheerful mood than usual.

I'm not one to know much about cars. Truthfully, all cars look the same to me. If anyone would name a model of a car, no image would pop in my head at all. However, I am able to tell when a car is luxurious and expensive. Jamie's car is exactly that. At least better than the one I drove back in my hometown. It was an old car that my dad gave me after he finally saved up enough for a new one for his own. It was a little beat up but I loved it just the same. It didn't have the leg rooms as I have right now sitting in Jamie's car though. I know it wasn't the best car but it took me where I needed to and it was comfortable enough for me. Looking up at Jamie from the passenger's seat makes me feel a little shy. What do you do when someone told you to make yourself comfortable? Do they actually mean it or do they just want to be polite? Maybe I'll just play it safe and tuck my feet together and not mess with anything in here.

"Relax. The leather seat is not gonna bite you," he snickers after noticing me shifting carefully in my seat.

"Yeah, but you might," quickly giving him the same retort energy.

"Wow. Hurtful. Although, you'll never know. Hope you already got your rabid shot."

His face stays on the road but his eyes peering sideways towards me while smirking at his own joke. A giggle start escaping from my mouth and he finally lets out a big heartful laugh I've ever heard from him.

I feel myself being a lot more relaxed in my seat after that. We continue our conversations along the ride but it was cut short when Jamie pulls over in front of the bookstore. A little disappointment in my heart when I realized that I have to say goodbye to him now.

As I’m getting out of the car, he asks, “What time your shift ends?”

“6 pm. Why?” I respond back through the passenger’s seat window.

“Sounds like a good time for dinner. I’ll pick you up,” he winks again and drives away.

“Wait, I-“ Oh there’s no use. He’s gone.

_____

Chapter 2

Note: Hi! I'm new on here and I'm sharing my writing for the first time on the internet and thought that it'd be nice to start on here. I don't know if this will take off or not but I'm excited for everyone to read it. Do let me know your thoughts and reblog if you like it. If it starts picking up then I will continue posting the next chapter :)

[thriceasniceasspiceonrice]

The more I learn about how modern generative AI works, the more impressive it seems as a bit of technology and the more confident I become in my reservations. Without going into the gory details, since they don't really matter, the basic steps are

Convert your preferred data (text, images, audio, whatever) you want into numbers

Do a ton of linear algebra to it

Convert those numbers back into whatever form you started with

Step 2 is usually genuinely clever, but only in the macro structure. The shape of the operations is thoughtfully designed by humans, but then the actual numbers put into the model are obtained through training on whatever corpus they can get their hands on. It's in this step where people accuse the models of theft or plagiarism.

I still don't quite know how to feel about that personally. At its core, training on publicly accessible work is exactly what people do when learning to create on their own so I don't think there's a realistic legal issue, but "taking inspiration" has never been possible at this scale, and I think a difference of magnitude has really become a difference in kind. The difference between people searching the world for inspiration and ideas from other artists and massive tech companies scraping the open web for anything and everything that they can find is the difference between individuals or small bands of fisherman going out and catching what they can in a day, and supertrawlers draining the ocean of any and every fish they can find.

But that's not really where my thoughts are crystallizing - moreso it's the fact that the computer fundamentally cannot understand what it's doing. You show the model a ton of training data and say "randomly shuffle your numbers around until you can make something that looks like this." And then if the large-scale structure of step 2 is designed well, then this can actually work, and the model can produce something recognizable. But it doesn't understand what it's done. If the model is making art, it has no sense of intentionality or symbolism or message. It's a monkey at a typewriter. If it's producing text, it has no idea what it's trying to communicate. It's not even trying to communicate anything, just puts words in an order that scan like language.

The guiding philosophies of technology and business see no problem with this. Everything is about results. The ends justify, or at the very least validate, the means. If this machine produces acceptable results, then who cares what's going on under the hood? It works. And it's hard to argue with that, because on some level they're right. Chatgpt can write an email that gets the job done. It's unpleasant to read, horribly inefficient, and built off of some at-best morally sketchy plagiarism, but it works. If that's all someone cares about, then no amount of philosophical justification about how it's soulless or immoral or inefficient is going to get through, because none of that changes the fact that it's a tool that solves the problem that they have to a degree that they deem acceptable.

And what makes it even more frustrating is that I know how they feel. It's like when a connoisseur tells you all the reasons that your tastes are trash, and you need to buy this specialty coffee that's $50/oz because the instant folgers just isn't worth drinking, when you don't care about the taste of coffee and you're just trying to wake up in the morning. They might even make you a cup and you might think "yeah this is definitely better but I simply don't like coffee enough to bother." I'm sure most of us have been on both sides of that interaction.

I don't know what the solution to this is, or indeed if it is a priori a problem. Certainly there are problems with generative AI don't get me wrong, but I know what the solutions to those are even less. It's certainly not going away, at least until people start caring less about results and more about processes, and I'd happily give 100:1 odds against that happening in my lifetime.