#...i was about to put spoiler tags then realized this thought is actually spoiler free shdflksjdlfkjsdfs

[lunar-wandering]

side note but, by the way, I don't think Wukong needs to apologize to Macaque for killing him.

allow me to elaborate on that.

I don't think Macaque expects or wants an apology. I don't think Wukong will ever truly feel the need to apologize, because it was likely what had to be done.

what i do think needs to happen, though, is that Wukong needs to somehow express that he still feels guilty about it, cause i think Macaque's impression of it all is that Wukong doesn't care that he killed him. (I mean, we all remember the flashback in s3ep4- Wukong looks impassive in it. emotionless. Macaque doesn't think Wukong cared).

and i think Wukong is only going to get closure on the guilt/trauma he still has about the whole thing if they have that conversation about it.

so instead of that moment between them being an "I'm sorry"... I think it should be something like; "I cared. I still do. Did you really think I didn't?"

[cloudcountry]

i created my own ikemen wrapped for 2023. this is how i feel about the routes i played by the end of the year!!

this isnt spoiler free so tread carefully!!

IKEMEN VAMPIRE!!

im sorry jean you would have had a higher rating if i DIDN'T play your route. i'm mostly neutral towards a lot of them but i ADORE the top four. it becomes even funnier when you realize that the top four are the only ones whose routes i have completed.

i played isaac's route twice, shakespeare's route twice, vincent's route once, and arthur's route once. i started comte's route only to drop it, and i am currently on jean's route!! i did not diversify my suitors at all JAHSJASGHD

a memorable thing about each suitor i played this year:

one thing i remember about isaac is when he started to fall in love with her, the scene in the church when he tied that ribbon in her hair. i nearly choked when he called her darling, he was smiling so sweetly and holding her so close. it was such a tender scene.

( honorable mention to that certain fanart i was tagged in so many times that the op called me a true isaac lover or something along those lines. it made me really happy that so many people, even people i didn't know, knew how much i adore him. )

for will, my most memorable moment of him was when i realized i loved him after playing vincent's route. i hadn't cried that hard over a character's misfortune in a while, but will's always been good at giving me a rollercoaster of emotions.

( honorable mention to vio calling my love for will blinding, ive thought about it a lot ever since she said that C: )

my most memorable moment of vincent was when he tried so hard to make mc genuinely smile on her first few days in the mansion. he didn't want her to feel uncomfortable so he tried his absolute best to make sure she could be herself and be happy. he really is an angel.

for arthur, it is one hundred percent his apology to mc for almost biting her. i've never seen him look more like a sad puppy in my five months of playing and honestly, it was so nice to see him reflecting on his actions and actually being able to admit his feelings (since we know arthur isnt the best with that.)

( once again, honorable mention to my enemies to lovers arc with this man. he's really not as bad as he appears, he is one of the most tender hearted and sweet men in the whole game. give him a chance if your heart allows it!! )

even though i'm not done with either comte's or jean's route, comte's most memorable moment was when he called the mc strong in chapter one. it was nice too see someone acknowledge her situation and try their best to help her instead of biting her. side eye.

and on that note, i'm sorry jean but your most memorable moment is the only one that made me angry. i hate that he bit her and i hate that the writing just skipped past it like it meant nothing. im blaming this on the writing itself because i believe jean's route is a good route so far, but it would have been so much better if it had a different beginning. but if i pick one that was actually wholesome, i'd say whenn he took her to the field of lilies and said the flowers were very her.

i started playing on july 2nd, 2023!! and what a journey it has been ^^

IKEMEN PRINCE!!

my first route was yves!! i wanted to play licht's first but people talked me out if it because his route is HEAVY!! i ended up playing rio's, then licht's, then nokto's, then i played about halfway through clavis's before keith's route was released. i played keith's route twice and then hopped back over to clavis, and i'm currently finishing up his route!!

a memorable thing about each suitor i played this year:

when mc chased after yves when he was leaving for obsidian just to tell him she loved him i was SCREAMING. i remember really admiring how much strength it must have taken to go to the kingdom that abandoned you.

for rio, it was 100% the discussion he had with nokto about how he doesn't want to be with mc because he might put her in danger by being with her, but ultimately he can't help himself. that was such a good insight into his character.

licht's route was. intense. and because of that it was packed with moments that i agonized over. but overall, i think what nokto told mc about how the closer she got to licht, the more she was hurting him stuck with me the most. it really showcased the bond between the twins and sent a knife through my heart :C

i actually forgot i played nokto's route and skipped right over him, and that probably says a lot LMAO oops. honestly i thought his route's pacing was weird but the romantic ending was very cute. the most memorable moment from his route wasnt even a cute one HELP!!! when mc straight up slapped him for no reason and he was like "oh so slapping me helps you huh??" and she was like " :(( no...." and then they made out like WHAT!!!

clavis is also a very memorable person, and after spending a lot of time analyzing him i know why so many people love him now. something that really stuck with me was his philosophy on government and how the current ruler decides whats right and wrong. i think the same about people in power so it was nice to see my sentiments reflected in a prince.

oooh its time for my favorite prince!! keith also had a lot of memorable moments and ive been sitting here for like ten minutes trying to pick out the best ones.

for nice keith, i'd say the moment when he told mc he would try his best to stop saying "a guy like me" and "i'm sorry" over and over. it really touched me because i know how hard it is to break that habit and it made me really happy when he said he'd try ^^

wicked keith was such a TEASE but the most memorable moment with him was when he and mc went out to that cafe and he actually answered a lot of her questions. i know that may seem trival but it felt like a sigh of trust to me and that felt really sweet.

( honorable mention to the scene were they gave mc the earrings they picked out for her during the christmas event, i actually cried. )

i started playing on july 11th, 2023!!

IKEMEN REVOLUTION!!

my first route was kyle ash and honestly i'd say for a guy i don't like romantically his route was very memorable. he's a great first route and if anyone is a bit indecisive as to who they want to pick i'd definitely recommend him!! ANYWAYS moving on, i played harr's route next, then edgar, zero, jonah, then i tried playing ray's but he was being stinky so i started lancelot's route.

a memorable thing about each suitor i played this year:

like i said, kyle had one of the best route i've ever read. listen to vivi aka the ikerev authority people. i remember lots of bits and pieces from his route, such as his determination to keep people alive, his pig goo, mc making him soup so he wouldnt drink himself to sleep, his gentle care for her once he figured out he liked her, how he pointed out the full moon and told her she could go home and was happy when she chose to stay, how he waited until everything was over to let her know how he felt, how he DIDNT DRINK on the night he wanted to make love to her, OUOTUOROUGUOUROHGH IM TELLING YOU HIS ROUTE WAS TOP TIER. but the thing that stood out to me the most was how him and mc worked together to save amon, and furthermore, to uphold kyle's principles. it was so heartwarming when mc told him to stick to what he believed in (even if i wanted to punch amon's teeth out during that scene)

i would keep talking about kyle's route but i have to move!! on!! because harr's route was peak domesticity. the first time he took his mask off in front of mc is one of my favorite moments (i actually did a happy little dance when i saw the other half of his face ehhe) because it shows such beautiful trust in her and arghgougohugo INSANE.

the most memorable moment of edgar's route was absolutely when he was so hesitant to let alice hold his hands, but when she takes them so comments on how warm they are. it was such an emotional moment because edgar was definitely feeling very complicated but alice was still there for him. i love them together :((

( honorable mention to vio saying i was alice reincarnated when i talked about that scene were they were all calling sweets evil LMAO that made me very giddy ^^ )

( second honorable mention to edgar asking mc if she thought pickles were a wolf in sheep's clothing??? weirdo. )

i was intrigued by zero all the way back in harr's route, and i started to really like him during edgar's route when he was trying his best to protect mc, which was really sweet. absoLUTELY the most memorable moment in his route was when he was fighting against the magic tower and he emerges from the rubble with an injured arm and a smile, just to tell alice "i'm home." i was crying like a BABY. zero i love you. please marry me.

jonah's route is a classic and a fan favorite, and i can see why. he starts out being arrogant and hell (and its irritating tbh) BUT he melts so quickly under gentle love and care. anyways, the red army routes seem to have a theme of giving up your position for what you believe is right because it happened like three times okay!! and jonah became a "traitor" to the red army just to protect alice. it was him and her against cradle and i will NEVER forget that.

lancelot's first impression was really bad but after playing all the red army routes and finally, his own route, i've grown to like him a lot. what really sticks out to me about his route is when he takes mc away from the dance floor because they're being stared at and they have a heart to heart. he tells you a single white rose would suit her or smth along those lines and when i looked up the meaning and saw it meant hope and renewal i DIED.

i started playing on july 27th, 2023!!

IKEMEN SENGOKU!!

my first route for sengoku was mitsunari, then kenshin, then kennyo, then sasuke, then kanetsugu, then yoshimoto. the only routes that didn't bore me to death at the end were mitsunari's, kennyo's (i was actually shocked when the route ended, it felt like the perfect length to me), and sasuke's. i can't speak for yoshimoto though since i just started. i feel like ikesen has a tendency to reallyyyy stretch out the routes but maybe thats just me.

a memorable thing about each suitor i played this year:

mitsunari was such a good first route for me, and the most memorable part of his route was definitely when he challenged nobunaga for mc. not only was it unexpected but i was so proud of him for betting so much on his plan AHGRHGG mitsunari my beloved.

kenshin's route was crazy but EASILY the best part was when mc rode into battle with an army of her own to stop kenshin from FLATTENING the country. she kicked ASS and earned the title "goddess of war" for what she did and that was so cool of her.

i played kennyo's route because of the parallels between him and kenshin and WOW i did not regret it. his route was phenomenal but the most memorable part was when mc and him buried the bell that kennyo had kept with him to remind him of all the lives he felt he was at fault for losing. it symbolized finally letting those people have their peace, and furthermore, kennyo's inner peace. it was beautiful.

sasuke really got me when he THREW himself into battle with kenshin after kenshin lied about him and mc liking each other. sasuke's desperation to let her know that he couldn't stand her being with someone else made my heart RACE. it was so nice to see a suitor finally being on the more "selfish" side.

kanetsugu's route had the Wonderful experience of mc carrying a head!! a decapitated head!! and while i'm sure he has a lot of cute moments (one of them being when he told mc he loved her and she FREAKED OUT) I CANNOT GET OVER MC PICKING UP A DECAPITATED HEAD LIKE ITS NOTHING!!! shes a trooper.

yoshimoto's route gives you the unique (and memorable!!) experience of a warlord actually viewing you as a friend instead of an enemy!! (keep in mind this is coming from someone who has only played ONE oda forces route. im constantly on the "enemy side" oops) i thought his mindset was very refreshing after months of "oh nooo we cant see each other we're enemiesssss"

i started playing on july 27th, 2023!!

this took me so long to write oh my goodness. it was fun though!! im thinking about how all of this information is only five months worth of playing so i dont know how im going to handle TWELVE MONTHS PLUS A NEW GAME but i'll figure it out. i might leave the fandom before then idk!! who knows!! but anyways thank you if you read my thoughts i love sharing them even though i know its a lot hehehe

[apocalypticavolition]

Let's (re)Read The Eye of the World! Chapter 38: Rescue

Listen and listen well: people who complain about this post being full of spoilers for the whole of The Wheel of Time series will be tortured like in the above image. This is your chance to get the hell away from my madness while you have a chance and I have no patience for anyone who is going to waste that opportunity. Block the tags, read the books, have a happy life!

This chapter has the Flame of Tar Valon as its icon, a reflection both of Moiraine's leading the rescue effort and of Lan's discussion of the factions within the White Tower.

Usually he collapsed like a wrung-out rag as soon as the Whitecloaks let him stop, but tonight his mind was racing. His skin crawled with dread that had been building for days.

Another favorable coincidence for our heroes. Frankly, Perrin and Egwene deserve to pass right out whenever they can after these hideous death marches they're being put through.

Light, how do I make them believe we aren’t Darkfriends when they’re already convinced we are? His stomach twisted sickeningly. In the end, he would probably confess to anything just to make the Questioners stop.

On the one hand, it's not very smart of Perrin to think that he can reason with these people when they've already established themselves to be very unreasonable. Also, killing two of someone's buddies is really no way to make friends.

On the other hand, it's very smart of Perrin to understand that the point of torture is to make the victims say whatever you want them to say. Unless he calls Egwene a whore or something I'm going to let him coast on this victory for the rest of this chapter.

Perrin tensed. Sometimes such a denial brought a lecture delivered in a grating near monotone, on confession and repentance, leading into a description of the Questioners’ methods of obtaining them. Sometimes it brought the lecture and a kick. To his surprise, this time Byar ignored it.

I have to wonder if it's Egwene getting kicked for having a smart mouth or if it's Perrin getting kicked for Egwene having a smart mouth. Both seem plausible with these fucks.

If Byar wanted them to escape? Byar, who was convinced to his marrow that they were Darkfriends. Byar, who hated Darkfriends worse than he did the Dark One himself. Byar, who looked for any excuse to cause him pain because he had killed two Whitecloaks. Byar wanted them to escape?

Oh wow, Perrin's actually thinking things through effectively this chapter! You go, Perrin. You don't even have to coast! Also, this accurately reflects your characterization as someone who seems slow because you think things through. I'm so happy.

Byar watched his changes of expression, and for the first time the Whitecloak’s eyes went to the rock he had tossed on the ground.

So, Byar doesn't know that Perrin's a wolfepath. I think what's going through his head is the realization that Perrin is a violent killer and the follow-up assumption that he might well take a rock meant to free him from his bonds and use it just effectively enough to bash someone else's skull in. Hence why he decides to kill Perrin now, because he's a dangerous man in multiple ways now that Byar miscalculated.

“Is it really . . . ?” Egwene gave a stifled sob. “We thought you were dead. We thought you were all dead.”

Speaking of people who's interiority we don't get to see right now, what has been going on in her head all this time anyway? Did she really think they were dead the whole time and was doing the dancing stuff as a "having survived a traumatic experience I'm going to throw myself into living as hard as I can"? Did she only give up hope when Perrin was so shitty about telling her they were alive or even later during the death march? I really don't know and every answer is fascinating in its own right.

He felt a prickle as it settled around his shoulders, a stab of worry between his shoulder blades. Was it Byar’s cloak he had ended up with? He almost thought he could smell the gaunt man on it.

There's something deeply symbolic about Perrin's terror that in reclaiming his axe and donning a disguise he's picked up something else, something worse, from the man he had to steal from.

A shadow stirred, and Moiraine’s voice came, weighted with irritation. “Nynaeve has not returned. I fear that young woman has done something foolish.”

What Moiraine's not saying is that Nynaeve preempted her signal here and that her fears are entirely justified since the gal just let off a thunderstorm. It wouldn't help her seem omniscient and inscrutable if she were forced to admit that the gang could so easily throw her off her schemes. Best to just roll with it.

Lan spun on his heel as if to return the way they had come, but a single whip-crack word from Moiraine halted him. “No!” He stood looking at her sideways, only his face and hands truly visible, and they but dimly shadowed blurs. She went on in a gentler tone; gentler but no less firm. “Some things are more important than others. You know that.” The Warder did not move, and her voice hardened again. “Remember your oaths, al’Lan Mandragoran, Lord of the Seven Towers! What of the oath of a Diademed Battle Lord of the Malkieri?”

Lan: Fuck my bond to you, fuck saving the world, fuck the Pattern, I'm saving Nynaeve!

Readers: Lan/Nynaeve comes out of nowhere.

Literally the only reason Lan doesn't ignore Moiraine right now is that Nynaeve comes back anyway.

“Elsewhere,” Moiraine replied, and Nynaeve muttered something in a sharp tone that made Egwene gasp. Perrin blinked; he had caught the edge of a wagoneer’s oath, and a coarse one.

Meaningless contest: Give me *your* ideas as to what Nynaeve said here. Bonus points to anyone who works in a nine horse hitch.

He still carried the white cloak, now rolled up and tied to his belt. The Warder said they must leave no more traces for the Children to find than they could help. He still thought he could smell Byar on it.

And there's gotta be more symbolism in the taint of Byar moving from something that covers Perrin directly to a mere tool on his belt.

“I believe they are in Caemlyn,” Moiraine said carefully, “or on their way there.” Nynaeve gave a loud, disparaging grunt, but the Aes Sedai went on as if she had not been interrupted. “If they are not, I will yet find them. That I promise.”

Nynaeve has a different approach to Aes Sedai bullshit than Lan's "You're dodging the question": make rude noises until they become specific enough for her liking. Their mutual contempt for the First Oath is just one of the many ways they're perfect for each other.

“You look surprised,” Nynaeve said. She looked a little surprised herself, and strangely frightened. “Next time, you can go to her.”

"Fuck you Perrin if you don't like the goop you can get Aes Sedaied! Respect me or be thrown to the witches!"

Nynaeve is always so delightfully extra.

“There was no foretelling this.” Moiraine spoke as if to herself. Her eyes seemed to look at something beyond him. “Something ordained to be woven, or a change in the Pattern? If a change, by what hand? The Wheel weaves as the Wheel wills. It must be that.”

You could try asking him, you know. Reassuring yourself that everything is fine, the situation is totally under control, most of the party is already back together and you totally know where the other dipshits are is all well and good when you are lucky enough to be on the right track, but what if you weren't?

“And most of what you’ve heard is wrong, no doubt. You must understand, there are . . . factions within Tar Valon. Some would fight the Dark One one way, some another. The goal is the same, but the differences . . . the differences can mean lives changed, or ended. The lives of men or nations. He is well, Elyas?”

You can tell that Lan does not remotely give a fuck about Perrin or his well-being except to the degree Moiraine tells him to by the way that he's so brutally misleading Perrin. The Red Ajah's reputation is pretty accurate even in empty farm country and the largest united faction in Tar Valon wouldn't fight the Dark One at all. Lan knows both of these things and if it were Rand in this sticky spot he'd be getting a full rundown of all Black Ajah activity that Lan and Moiraine had personally foiled.

“The Dark One can’t touch us unless we name him.” Immediately Perrin thought of the dreams of Ba’alzamon, the dreams that were more than dreams. He scrubbed the sweat off his face. “He can’t.”

Oh hey Perrin, you really are on a roll this chapter. Like, you're not right on this statement in particular, but the thrust of what you're saying - that the Shadow (or for that matter, the Light) can't choose you to serve it, only you can make that choice (bar being transformed so utterly as to effectively be dead) - is an important theme in these books.

“The walls of the Dark One’s prison. This may be the end of an Age. We may see a new Age born before we die. Or perhaps it is the end of Ages, the end of time itself. The end of the world.” Suddenly he grinned, but his grin was as dark as a scowl; his eyes sparkled merrily, laughing at the foot of the gallows.

Frankly Lan is talking so much here that I can only conclude that he's been pulled into Perrin's ta'veren effect. That said, this is perhaps the first clear indicator that Lan is deeply unwell in his own way, so effortlessly casual about the end of the world because he assumes he's going to die in the next few years anyway. His own worldview is deeply nihilistic and he really does think that at any point any of them could be turned to the Shadow. Part of that must be some personal experience with the 13x13 arrangement and/or men like Ingtar, but I think that in general he's so internalized the doomed war his childhood prepared him for that now that the stakes are changed he can't help but assume it's all doomed anyway.

But we're at the end of this chapter, so I can stop trying to figure out the psyche of everyone around Perrin and relax. Next time, we return to Rand and get our first view of the most poorly constructed palace walls of all time!

[not-so-mundane-after-all]

It's new year and Mundi is back to writing Titans!

I'm kicking off 2023 by going back to work on a big project of the current working title "Acrida" and it's an idea that's been living rent free in my head probably since season 1 but only recently took real shape. We have all my favorite things and tropes in it - there's time travel, Dad Grayson, his BFF Donna, a tiny, fussing baby with as much personally as her teenager self 👀, loads of humor and loads of angst! I've teased it before already, but since it's going to be a while before I actually start posting chapters (I want to have it finished before I post), I decided I'm going to promote it by dropping a fairly spoiler-free sneak peek whenever I write something I'm particularly happy about! And this nugget here is a result of today's writing session. Enjoy!

Donna rolled her eyes with a laugh, "You're silly. You know that?"

He was about to respond, though with what exactly he wasn’t sure, but then he noticed she was fiddling with something in her hands. When Donna saw his curious look, she flipped the item over so he could examine it from a different angle; he soon realized it was a cheap, disposable camera.

"I got this at a gas station,” she told him, spinning the camera in her hands. It was a standard black rectangle with the Kodak logo printed on it; she had one just like this when they were teenagers — their silly photos are still buried somewhere in a box deep in his walk-in closet at The Wayne Manor. 

Donna handed it to him and shrugged. “Not much compared to my stuff, but it will still do the job.”

“What job?”

Her face softened. “I figured you’d love to have some baby pictures of her. So your memories can be more than just, you know, memories."

Dick weighed the camera in his hand. He didn’t think of that at first, but now that Donna has mentioned it, he did want to have something that would keep the memory of baby Rachel alive. Back home, they didn’t have any baby pictures of either her or Gar, and it was never something any of them particularly cared about until Kory got pregnant and they came back home with their first ultrasound pictures of Mar’i. Kory got very upset that there were no pictures of Gar and Rachel when they were babies that she could add this one to. Dick remembered finding her curled up on the couch with them both with tears in her eyes as she asked them question after question about what they knew about themselves at that time, if they remembered any pictures ever existing, or what their parents had told them in the past. 

He blamed her emotional state on hormones then. But the thought of having to return home without tangible proof that he had held his adopted daughter in his arms when she was just a tiny, fussing baby was unimaginable to him. Now he understood Kory’s grief a little more.

He whispered a quiet "thank you" to Donna as his anger and embarrassment faded and turned into warmth. The silence was broken by an eruption of a sweet baby laugh coming from the other room, and Dick felt himself smiling.

If you want to see more, I'll be posting the sneak peeks under the "Acrida Fic" tag. And if you want to be tagged in sneak peeks and chapters when they come out, let me know! In the meantime, I have one more His Dark Materials sweet one-shot I'll be working on and some Dickkory spice coming your way 👀🥵 my besties put out VDay prompts and gears started turning 😏

[rubberduckyrye]

To respect your fic and the spoilers, I will also put this under a readmore :D

Oooooh, I had a feeling it was ASPD or BPD. I know those disorders are often demonized to hell and back and I know a little bit about BPD due to osmosis and my own studying for when I was looking up to see if I had BPD and/or for my Kokichi's backstory with Kenzo, where he gets Kokichi diagnosed very early on as a child with BPD to further gaslight and control the people around Kokichi into believing he's acting out and all when he doesn't even HAVE actual BPD. I've heard horror stories of Autistic people being misdiagnosed with BPD and having the worst time with medical professionals because of it. I was even advised by MY OWN THERAPIST not to pursue the diagnosis because the treatment for BPD is CBT and having BPD on my profile would ruin my ability to get anything done.

I digress though!

I had no idea that ASPD involved chronic boredom like that--then again it seems like a lot of problematic behavioral symptoms of several mental disorders stem from boredom (Lord knows how Boredom from my ADHD has me going crazy--there's a reason why ADHDers are also known for being adrenaline junkies, I've heard stories of kids throwing things at their siblings just because they were so bored) really I'm starting to understand Junko more and mroe the more I realize how crippling boredom is as a feeling and I'm Scared of that xD

And I know how boredom can quickly lead to suicidal thoughts too.

My own boredom stints lead to self hatred and those horrible thoughts, and tbh my only reliable way to get rid of those feelings is to take a fucking Nap. Sometimes I need to take my anxiety meds to help me shut off my brain tbh like I have insanely rapid thoughts.

That's really valid of you not to respect the DSM tbh--I'm also frustrated with how people treat ADHD in how it disrupts others lives rather than how it affects the individual. As an OSDD system myself, I'm also not soo sure how I feel about cutting out the seperation of OSDD 1-a and OSDD 1-b because I actually find the differences to be helpful! I have OSDD 1-b, AKA I have distinguished Alters who are Not Me but I don't have huge blackouts. I actually often give Kokichi OSDD 1-a, him having multiple alters that are versions of himself but with blackouts. Yay for projecting your mental bullshit onto your faves! Still I'm Rambling I am Sorry

I honestly want to do more research on ASPD in general, but since it's one of the harshly stigmatized disorders, I'm going to guess there's a LOT of garbage on the internet about it. Mind telling me and my followers more, since you know way more about it than I suspect the random internet page I find via research will know?

Feel free to take the time to infodump about it here! I'm sure me and my followers would be happy to learn the full scope of the disorder from a lens that doesn't demonize it--ah, unless it's emotionally taxing to do so? I just noticed your tags nasjdjkdnask If it's too much to ask then feel free to just say as such, but I would love some reading material if you know any good ones.

@kindlyre

Okay I'm VERY curious as to what mental illness you're writing Rantaro to have because it seems to be one of those stigmatized ones and I'm v curious???

[dimepdf]

LEAVE THE DOOR OPEN. — ANDREW!PETER PARKER

summary | When it came to you, Peter couldn't hide his horny excitement.

pairing: peter parker x male!reader

genre: smut, barely any plot

length: 1.3k words

cw: no nwh spoilers, male reader, he’s insecure be nice, you can’t convince me he isn’t the type to do finger guns after sex, himbo Peter

song(s) to listen to: Leave the door open by Bruno Mars, Anderson Paak, Silk Sonic 

a/n | I am milking all I can get from the andrew!peter tag rn, someone please help me get this man out of my mind he is moving in free of rent as we speak. Please I saw someone mention how he was the horniest spiderman and went “…yes.”

masterlist. / taglist. / any request?

MINORS DNI 

what you doing? where you at? Oh, you got plans? Don’t say that.

“do you want to come over later?” 

It was the text message from you that was enough to leave Peter written with anxiety for his entire class period.

the man was fidgeting with whatever he could get his hands on that hour.

to be fair, you never really had to give permission for Peter to come over during the three years you two had known each other and the year you put a label on your relationship.

It was obvious what the meaning was behind the message; you wanted him to come…over.

this is related to the conversation you two had yesterday about each other's boundaries and needs.

(He honestly thought you were going to end your relationship with him because you were using your series black mom voice with him.)

BUT ONLY BECAUSE IT IS VERY IMPORTANT TO TALK WITH YOUR PARTNERS ABOUT BOUNDARIES AND TO BE CLEAR ON WHAT IS YOURS.

plus, as his first boyfriend, you understood that he's a little shy with his affection, but you can bet that if he wants a kiss, he'll literally walk across campus to get it.

after class, the boy couldn't stop himself from sprinting towards your next hour, memorizing your schedule by heart.

pulls you aside and apologizes and makes excuses for things he wasn't even sure he did.

you were just like “…Peter I just want to have sex with you.” 

…

“Oh cool, uh I accept, thanks!”

My house clean, my pool warm, just shaved. 

you didn't say anything about how excited you were to finally get into your adorable boyfriend’s pants.

YOU CLEANED YOUR APARTMENT FOR THIS HELLO?

you've tried before to get past the making-out stage.

as you two locked lips, things got hot and heavy, with Peter leaning over on top of you.

your hand trailing down his bare stomach, almost touching the elastic of his underwear

Peter moaned at the new sensation that shot through his entire body when you thrust your hips up to rub against his.

it made Peter’s mind instantly go blank 

he realized shortly after that he…finished in his pants.

okay, he's really touched deprived. but you promised never to make fun of him or bring it up again.

I ain’t playing no games, every word that I say is coming straight from the heart, so if you tryna lay in these arms

when you swung open your apartment door, he was literally shaking.

“You okay there Spiderboy?”

“Yeah? what? why would I not be okay…I need to use the bathroom” 

you tried not to laugh as you watched him stumble away to your restroom, his jeans showing the most obvious boner.

you took it slowly for Peter's sake, knowing that his mind was probably racing.

deciding that it would be more comfortable and less stressful for him if you just did what you two always did when he came over to hang out: order takeout and cuddle while watching shitty comedy movies on Netflix

I’ma leave the door open, hoping that you feel the way I feel and you want me like I want you tonight

Peter was far from comfortable.

you didn't notice how he shifted as you snuggled closer to his side, or how he exhaled as you placed your hand against his lap.

he was too preoccupied with pretending he wasn't freaking out to actually stop himself from freaking out.

kissed you literally the moment you tilted your head up to look at him from his chest.

like you had to blink before processing that he was now making out with you.

It was as if a weight was lifted from his shoulders the moment you started kissing back and reaching your hand into his hair.

as you leaned back against the couch, he took over the kiss by welcoming his tongue into your mouth and following you with his mouth on yours.

his hand quickly wrapped around your waist to relieve the vexing need that was pressing against his jeans.

his other hand is above your head, supporting himself.

he backed away from the kiss and chuckled nervously before biting his lip and looking down.

“Is it okay if I take my pants off?”

you and Peter were now pantless on your couch in record time.

It only made him dizzier seeing you fumbling with his zip with such concentration written on your face.

I need you, baby. I gotta see you, baby. Girl, I’m tryna give this…

as Peter whimpered against your mouth, the kissing became a little sloppy.

grinding his cock against yours, the only thing keeping you apart was each other's boxers.

did I mention that he was touch-deprived yet? because the sensation of your hands lingering on his back was driving him insane.

I have a feeling he would be the type to moan over the smallest of things.

you pull away to kiss down his neck: he whines.

tilting your hips against his when he pulls away: he whines.

wrapping your hands in his hair and tugging it: good job you broke him.

“Can i?”

“God please touch me.”

was enough for you to completely take control over the whimpering white man.

as you sat on his lap, you pushed him back and straddled his hips.

getting a clear view of how smitten you’ve made him from your touch. 

placing a hand against his rapidly rising chest, feeling how hard his heart was beating against his chest, his pink lips slightly swollen, his hair all over the place from having your fingers tangled in it.

“Uh did you bring a condom?” 

“Oh…I forgot”

having to spend the next 20 minutes painfully slipping back into his jeans and speed walking to the corner store as if he didn't have the hardest fucking boner in his life

“Okay where were we”

“Ow Peter don’t grab it like that”

I’ma leave the door open, and I’m hoping that you feel the way I feel 

It didn't take long for you two to return to your previous state.

as you coaxed yourself down on Peter's length, his hands gripped your waist.

the farther he was inside of you, the more Peter felt like he was going to fucking die, his head tilted back, mouth gaping, and eyes squeezed so tight he was starting to see stars.

got him holding onto you like his LIFE depended on it.

when you bottomed out he let out a small sigh and twitched. 

you have to realize this man has inhuman strength; he is holding back so much so that he doesn’t think with his dick and can take you at whatever pace he pleases.

because he is a gentleman and wants the moment to be memorable :)

lets you set the pace.

you were certain he'd leave bruises from how tight he was clutching your waist as you bounced on his lap.

you do get choked up at some point, and Peter takes advantage of the pause to thrust into you.

lifting you up as if you were nothing and treating you like his personal fuck doll.

when you finished on his chest, he had the proudest fucking smile on his face.

“That was really hot baby :D”

about that inhuman strength 

when he's close, he wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you close as he whimpers into your chest, pulling you into the most bone-crushing hug imaginable.

is the type to accidentally overstimulate himself and starts CRYING 

“You want to take a break, honey?”

the aftercare you have to give this man is extra; you literally have to limp to the bathroom and clean each other up before slipping into bed with him by your side and letting him be the little spoon, telling him how good it felt, complimenting him on everything.

Peter is the type to overthink things right away, and he constantly believes he isn't good enough. Please, even if he appears annoyed, I swear inside he's a big baby who loves to be praised.

Tell me that you’re coming through.

notes: Is anyone else scrolling through the Andrew Garfield tag like it’s a daily routine or is that just me? Marvel needs to drop a new movie or series so I can have another obsession please, the Hawkeye series gave me nothing but hot Yelena scenes and pretty Kate Bishop. I am on a short leash at the moment give me another hot male character Marvel I am on my knees.

- taglist: @tsukishimawhore  @meowkinq @denkisdurag @lolalora​ @thatbaepizzalover @​louderfortheback @cxnismajcr​ 

[baby-girl-e]

Cowboy like me

Characters - Iceman x Maverick, Carole Bradshaw

Summary - Ice once called Maverick a Cowboy. Maybe he was right, but maybe Ice was a cowboy like him. 

Or Maverick gets invited to his cousin's wedding and Ice tags along as his secret lover. 

Word Count - 5k

Warnings - mentions of period typical homophobia

A/N - This one is massive, but she’s my baby so I don’t care. Cowboy like me by Taylor Swift is one of my favorite songs and it just SCREAMS Icemav in my head. I hope you like it and all of the lyric Easter eggs I’ve included :)

Maverick never thought he’d find love. Not in that ‘oh woe is me’ sort of way, but in the genuine way of, he just didn’t think it would happen. When he met Charlie he thought maybe he was wrong, he let himself believe it for just a moment. That moment was fleeting, she left without as much as a goodbye. Maverick was absolutely crushed, he vowed in that moment to never get his hopes up again. However his wingman apparently had other plans. Ice showed up at his door after he heard about the breakup with beer and pizza stating that he could wallow this one night and then he was done. Much to Mav’s surprise it actually worked, the day Ice demanded that he get over it he actually started to feel better. 

“Honestly Mav it would be embarrassing to be so put out by someone like her. She can’t even fly a jet and yet she wants to tell us how? No thanks.” 

Ice’s words, although harsh, were exactly what he needed to hear. He still built a brick wall around his heart, but at least he wasn’t crying anymore. 

He carried on like that for a while. Waking up, teaching at TOP GUN, hanging out with Ice, sleep, repeat. It was grossly mundane but it was working. He had a schedule and something to look forward to. He realized later that it was actually someone that he looked forward to. Ice was the best part of his day. If he did something he was particularly proud of, Ice was the first person he wanted to show. If there was a new movie out, he couldn’t imagine watching it with anyone else. 

Of course Maverick being Maverick he never thought of it as love. Why would he? He had deemed himself incapable and not allowed. Ice on the other hand was on a better track, unbeknownst to Maverick.

He remained clueless until one of his weekly phone calls with Carole when she tried to point out the obvious. 

“Peter Mitchell, you are so in love with that boy.”

“What? No Carole this is Ice. He’s a man.” 

Silence on the other end. Then a very dramatic sigh.

“Pete, my sweet angel. Did you know that you can fall in love with someone, even if they’re a boy?”

“Yes Carole-anne I know. But I’ve never even thought a guy was attractive, how can I be in love with one?”

He knew that woman enough to know she hated being called Carole-Anne, he was hoping to try and derail her choice of subject. In hindsight he should’ve known, this is Carole, she was the human epitome of ‘if there’s a will, there’s a way’. 

“There’s a first for everything sweetie. Will you indulge me, just this once? Just hear me out.” 

There was no way he’d get out of this, better to get it over with fast. 

“Fine Carole, but there’s no way this is going to end like you think it will.”

(Spoiler alert, it does)

“That’s the spirit! Okay, first question. And feel free to just answer these in your head if they’re too personal. When you wake up in the morning, who do you most look forward to seeing?”

“Hey, that's not fair. Ice is the only competent person I see all day. It’s either him, my students, or fucking Viper. We’re friends, it's not that weird.” 

“Okay, okay. Next question, when you called to tell me about that cat you rescued from a pipe, was I the first person you thought to tell?”

His immediate thought had been Ice. He didn’t think much of it then but now? Maybe she was onto something. His first thought was often, ‘I've got to tell Ice.’

“That silence is loud Mav. Okay now I want you to close your eyes.”

“Carole, this is silly.”

“Hush boy, are they closed?”

Maverick reluctantly closed his eyes and told Carole he had them shut. 

“Now, imagine you’re at home. It’s a Saturday night and you’re bored. You’re just dying to do something. Then there’s a knock at your door, you open it and, who’s there Maverick? Who do you wish was there? Living people only, you can’t say Nicky.” 

Ice. There was no question. It was how he had been spending his Saturday nights for the last couple of months. 

“It’s Ice Care bear.” 

“Wow, I never would have imagined. Keep your eyes closed for this last thing, and bare with me here. He comes in, and kisses you. Be brutally honest here, would you pull away? Or would you kiss him back?” 

That was enough to give him mental whiplash. Never before had he imagined kissing Ice. But he listened to Carole, like he always did, and tried his best at imagining what it would be like. 

Oh, Oh. 

He audibly gasped at the thought. He’s sure he’d kiss like he flew, straight to the point. A man on a mission. He’d probably hold Maverick in a vice like grip, and he can almost feel his hands at his waist. 

“Fuck Carole.”

“Sorry Pete. This probably isn’t the best of revelations is it?”

For a million different reasons, no. It’s the worst revelation. But for that one good reason? It’s everything. 

After that phone call Pete is hyper aware of his interactions with Ice. He notices every look, every touch, everything. He can’t decide if he’d rather the feeling be mutual or not. On the one hand if Ice didn’t like him like that, he’d be crushed. But if he did? That was an entire can of worms that he wasn’t particularly excited to open. 

“Alright Mav, give it up. What’s wrong?”

“What? Nothings wrong. Why would you think that?”

“I don’t know, maybe the fact that you’ve said maybe four words to me since I came over? Or the fact that you’re sitting on the other side of the couch like I’ve got some contagious disease or something.” 

He was right. He was sitting so far away because of something contagious. He was noticing how good looking he actually was and wanted to jump him every other second. He could play it cool at work, no matter how good he looked in that uniform it was a reminder of why crushing on Iceman like a schoolgirl was such a bad idea. But here in the comfort of his own home, Ice on his couch wearing sweats and a black t-shirt he was certain was soft, his self control was dwindling. 

“Ice I’m fine. Don’t worry about it.” 

Almost like he didn’t hear him, he scoots closer to Maverick, getting right in his face. Maverick couldn’t help but let out a small gasp. 

“No, I’ll worry about whatever I want. What’s going on?” 

He said it so soft and low that Maverick couldn’t help his gaze dropping to the other man's lips. They looked so soft and inviting he almost reached out. Almost.

“I can’t say Ice. I just can’t.”

He was whispering now too. There was no way he could trust his voice to stay steady otherwise. Ice’s eyes caught Mavericks again and put his hand on the joint of his neck and shoulder. 

Maverick shudders.

“Hey, it’s me. There’s nothing you can say that will make me run away.”

Oh he could think of a few things. But he didn’t think Ice would drop it anytime soon. 

“Promise you won’t laugh at me or stop being my friend?”

He had never felt so small in his life. He felt like a child, just begging for love. 

“I promise. There’s no getting rid of me.”

His eyes looked genuine. He was serious. Maverick thinks he could do this. 

“Well lately… I’ve been having these feelings. Romantic feelings. For you.” 

There it was, bomb dropped, now all that was left was brace for impact and damage control. 

The impact hit and… Ice broke into a smile. Wait, a smile?

“You do?”

He looked almost childlike too. Only his wasn’t fear, it was hope. Almost like he couldn’t believe what he was hearing, but in a good way. 

“Yeah Tom. I do.”

Mav could see tears starting to form in his wingman’s eyes.

“Fucking finally.”

The next thing he knew he was being kissed. This kiss was nothing like he’d imagined. Still straight to the point, but oh so much better. Maverick was kissing him back in an instant and felt those hands he had imagined move from his shoulder to his waist. The intensity picked up and before Maverick knew it he was on Ice’s lap. He was straddling the taller man and took this opportunity to feel his hair for the first time. It was softer than he’d imagined in this un-gelled state, short but still long enough for Maverick to run his fingers through. The sound that prompted out of Ice’s mouth was positively sinful. It was all Maverick could do to moan back. 

Eventually air became a need and they pulled away slightly. 

“Fuck Mav. That was…”

“Yeah. I know. How do we…”

Neither of them could finish sentences at the moment it seemed. But the question of How do we do this still hung in the air. It was the looming threat of dishonorable discharge that made them hesitate in the first place. 

“Did we just kiss?”

Apparently kissing Ice made Maverick stupid, more so than usual. 

“Yes Pete we did. Do you wanna do it again?”

“Yes please.”

And so they did. Again. And again. And again. Eventually they found themselves in the Kitchen? How did they get here?

“Seriously Mav, we need to talk about this. Do we want to keep doing this?”

“Oh I absolutely do.”

“As in just the kissing or… like an actual relationship?”

Maverick thought for a moment. He wasn’t sure they could ever have an actual relationship, at least not in the same sense most straight couples do. But whatever they came up with, he wanted it. 

“I want everything with you Tom. Whatever we can get away with.” 

And so they did. True to their word they made their own version of a relationship. Ice told Slider and Maverick told Carole and Merlin. He had gotten close with the RIO in the months following the Layton rescue. The circle was small, but they didn’t need the world to know for them to feel valid. They had who mattered. 

Sooner or later a year goes by and the couple is all but living together. Ice rarely goes to his house, if only to keep up appearances. They’re on the couch one night when Maverick gets a phone call, not uncommon given Carole usually calls at this time of night. 

Mav comes back from the kitchen with an unreadable look on his face, which is uncommon given Ice is usually able to read his boyfriend like a book. 

“Babe? Something wrong?”

“No, no. That was my Aunt Margie.”

“Aunt? I didn’t know you had relatives you still talked to.”

Tom was right. Maverick really didn’t have much family that he still talked to. His dads family made him out to be a pariah after what went down and his mothers family was nearly non-existent. 

“Not much no, but this aunt was only 20 when everything with my dad went down and she was already disowned by the family because she had a kid at 16. She contacted me when I was a teenager and introduced me to my cousin Emma, she was only a little younger than me. Anyways, we were always close, I still call on holidays and birthdays. They called after Goose died.”

“Oh baby I had no idea. What did she want just now?”

“Emma’s getting married.”

Maverick couldn’t believe someone younger than him was getting married. He supposed that maybe if things were different him and Tom would probably be starting to talk about that too. A nice thought.

“Wow. Are you going to go?”

“Yeah she was calling for my accurate address so she could send an invite, on the flip side I’m one of their only family members too. It’s in two months, Texas.”

“Two months huh? That’ll probably line up with our leave.” 

“Which poses the question, would you go with me? She already said I could bring a plus one.”

Tom looks stunned, like it had never crossed his mind. They had spent so much time just assuming that they’d be doing things separate that it shocked them to consider doing stuff in public, together.

“I’m sure she meant it to be a romantic partner, Pete.”

“Well it’s a good thing you’re my boyfriend then Tom.” 

“You know what I mean.” 

Of course he did. All he did was understand that stupid little fact. It was killing him. 

“She knows I’m a pilot, I’ll introduce you as my wingman. We can even come up with some story that you have family in Texas and decided to tag along to save money on gas.”

“Maverick she just called, how did you think of that so fast?”

“Darlin, I spend most of my time thinking up excuses for us to do all sorts of things. I love you like that.”

Tom had tears in his eyes, something Maverick noticed ever since they started dating. It was almost like he couldn’t believe Maverick was in love with him, even if they had exchanged those words months ago.

“Well when you put it like that… Let’s do it.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah baby. Let’s go to Texas.”

                    ///

Maverick was extatique to say the least. He spent the next two months booking a hotel and making all of the necessary arrangements. He even researched towns for Ice’s fake family to be from in case someone asked. 

Finally the day came for them to leave and Maverick was up before the sun packing the car. 

“Mav, baby, I love you but for Christ’s sake the sun isn’t even up.”

“We’ve got places to be darlin, giddy up!”

“Pete, you did not just say ‘giddy up’.”

Ice looks pretty, all exasperated in the light of the just now rising sun, staring up at Pete from their shared bed.

“We’re going to Texas my dear, I’m just getting you ready.”

A signature eye roll from the Iceman.

Eventually they made it on the road, with a little prodding from Pete and a lot of groaning from Ice. The ride itself was long but peaceful if Pete was being honest. The only times that the two of them get to feel like a real couple was when they were alone (besides the times they were around their friends that knew) and this car ride was an extended amount of alone time. They held hands whenever they felt like it, even if Ice had lectured him on safe driving (but he never let go). They talked, and talked, and talked. About nothing in particular, just whatever came up. 

“Ice, you’re telling me that you had a girlfriend for an entire year and you didn’t know?”

Ice was driving and past flings came up. A lighthearted mistake honestly.

“First of all I was thirteen. It wasn’t like we were kissing. I thought she was my friend and she and everyone else thought she was my girlfriend. Never in my life have I thought a woman was attractive, she was my first and only girlfriend.”

“Well, I wish I could say the same. You’re my first and only boyfriend.” 

Pete realized what he said too late. Was it too soon to talk about forever? Or could they ever talk about forever in their situation?

“That confident huh? Think I’ll put up with your crazy ass forever?”

“You love my ass.”

Tom laughs and Pete lets out a laugh of relief. Ice made a joke about forever, but he never said no. He’ll take it. 

                    ///

They eventually (after a fifteen hour drive) make it to Lubbock, Texas where Mav’s cousin is getting married. They pretty much drop dead in the hotel room, not even having the energy to take advantage of the change of scenery and the comfortable bed. Well, they did use the bed but for strictly passing out. 

The next day is the wedding and Pete is nervously pacing the room as they get ready. 

“Let’s go over this one more time.”

“Baby, I’ve got it. If anyone asks, I am visiting family too, we decided to just drive together.”

“And if they ask where they’re from?” 

“I say they’re in San Antonio. Don’t worry, I know what I’m doing.”

Pete gave him a nervous smile and Tom pulled him in for a kiss. 

“Hey, baby, it’ll be alright. Okay? Let’s just relax a bit and enjoy some time together. Hm?”

Pete was anxious and for good reason. He was about to introduce his boyfriend to some of the last people living he considered family. But they couldn’t know he was his boyfriend and damnit if that didn’t hurt. Pete thought Ice was pretty much the coolest person ever, and the fact that he loved Pete? He wanted to shout it from the rooftops. 

They arrived at the wedding without incident, but in a pleasant silence that only came with their level of connection. Walking into the venue, which was some fancy country club, he didn’t really know what to expect. He honest to god only knew the bride and her mother and from his knowledge of weddings while limited, those were the two busiest people on a wedding day. 

“What do we do, just sit?” Pete asked Tom in a whisper, only leaning in slightly. Back into the mode of ‘we’re just wingmen, nothing more.’

“What, have you never been to a wedding before?”

Pete stared at him blankly. Not really knowing how to answer since he hadn’t but he knew that wasn’t a normal thing. 

“Oh, you haven’t, have you?” Tom looked genuinely shocked. 

“I mean I’ve seen them on TV, so I know the gist but… never in real life no.” 

Tom looked sad, like he was just putting together why he hadn’t. Pete had been an orphan for a great majority of his life. He had no family but the people whose wedding they were currently at, and it wasn’t like his foster families were super keen on parading him in front of their friends. 

“Well I have, so I'll show you. Sometimes they want you to mix and mingle, and other times you sit on a specific side if you’re there for either the bride or groom.” He loved Tom for just explaining it and not dwelling on his less than fun childhood. He always knew what to do. 

They venture further into the venue and Pete see’s what is clearly an aisle with chairs on either side. Behind it is a big white tent over the tennis courts, he made an educated guess that it was for the reception.

“See there’s a sign here that says Bride so that’s the side we’ll sit on.” Tom points out a fancy wooden sign that indeed said bride. 

They sit towards the back, hoping to inadvertently avoid people talking to them, but that seemed an impossible feat for a wedding. They were approached by what he assumed were two bridesmaids almost immediately. 

“I don’t believe we know you two, how do you know the bride?” They seemed nice, both blonde, one tall and the other a little shorter. Obviously his type, case in point: Ice, but he was way too obsessed with Ice to even notice their looks. 

“I’m Pete Mitchell, Emma’s cousin. This is Tom Kazansky, my wingman.” He gestured to Ice and he gave the girls a polite wave. 

“Wingman huh? Are you pilots?” Ah this age old question. 

“Naval Aviators actually.” If Ice weren’t in public that surely would have gotten an eye roll out of him. 

“Oh I see, well I’m Emma’s best friend Suzanne, and this is the equivalent of my wingman Anna.” 

Pete couldn’t help but laugh. She probably didn’t think of her friend in the same way that Pete thought of Tom, but he understood the sentiment. 

“Well it’s nice to meet you both. I’m sorry I can’t say she’s mentioned you.” 

“Emma’s always been private about her family for reasons I’m sure you understand. She’s mentioned you a couple times, said you were a victim of the Mitchell shame too?” 

“That’s one way of putting it. The Mitchell’s were always about what they looked like to everyone else, and I guess a child of a teen mom and the son of a traitor was just too much.” 

Ice was a silent participant in this conversation, but his eyes went wide at his boyfriend's words. Pete wished he could squeeze his hand to reassure him that he knew what he was saying, but alas. 

“She mentioned that too. I’m sorry they got you too. But from the looks of it you found yourself some family too?” 

She didn’t even know the half of it. Tom was his everything. 

“Indeed I did.” 

“Well, we’ll catch you later, shows about to start.” With that they walked away, leaving Ice and Mav alone once more. 

“Since when are you so loosey goosey with the whole ‘I’m Duke Mitchell’s kid’ thing?” 

“Since they weren’t Navy people. I’ve learned that people outside of the Navy don’t really care that your dad is an enemy of the state. At least not much.” 

Ice smiled and god was he ever going to get used to that? Ironically his smile made him feel like he was being melted from the inside out. 

                        ///

The ceremony was nice, a little boring, but Ice told him that it was normal. He couldn’t help thinking what his and Tom’s wedding would be like. He knew that was a dangerous thought, but he couldn’t help it. In an imaginary world he knew they’d have the class of ‘86 there to celebrate with them, something small. Pete would want to send invitations to everyone he knew though, once again having the urge to shout that he loved Tom Kazansky and was loved back from the top of his lungs. 

They made their way to the tent covered Tennis Court that had been lit up with twinkle lights after the sun started to set. It really looked pretty magical. Romantic. 

“Wait here and I’ll get us drinks?” Tom was a great boyfriend, albeit a secret one. 

“That’d be great thanks.” He had to physically restrain himself from calling him babe and it hurt more than it should’ve. 

Tom left with a wink and Pete found himself alone at the table, not something he was upset about. But it didn’t last long before his aunt found him. 

“Pete! I’m so glad you came!” She embraced him in a hug and Pete all but melted into it. It had been too long since he had a maternal hug that wasn’t from Carole.

“Me too Margie. Congratulations by the way.”  She pulled away but still held Pete by his arms. 

“Oh I didn’t do much. She found him all on her own. How are you doing?” What a loaded question. Honestly? He was doing great. He had a boyfriend he adored and a job he loved. The only thing that would make it better was to have Nick by his side to enjoy it with him. 

“Things are good. I’m doing good, honestly.”

She gave him a knowing smile, she was always smarter than anyone in his family. 

“That’s good to hear Pete. I hope you’ll introduce me to your wingman tonight, maybe get some insight as to just how good your life’s been?”

Wait, what did she mean by that?

“Oh, Margie he’s just-”

“I know Pete, your wingman. Don’t worry I’m not asking, I’m just happy you’re finally happy, no matter the reason.” 

She patted his cheek and walked away before he could say anything else. It wasn’t until he felt a tear on his cheek that he realized what had just happened. She knew, and she didn’t care. Well would you look at that. 

                    ///

Eventually Ice came back with their drinks and Pete told him what his aunt had said. He was nervous, obviously, but he trusted Pete and if Pete trusted her? That was enough. They were just hanging out when Suzanne approached their table. 

“So, how’d we do, boys?” She had an air of humor about her, someone he could really see himself being friends with. 

“You didn’t trip once, I’d say it was a success.” Ice had been quiet for most of the day, so it was nice to hear him loosening up a bit. Probably thanks to that drink.

“Well Tom that’s good to hear, I actually had some less than noble intentions coming to say hi. I was wondering if you’d like to maybe dance?” Her question was directed at Tom and Pete could nearly hear his heart break. Oh. 

“I’d be honored.” Say what you want about Iceman, cold-hearted or whatever, but the man was a gentleman. He had to say yes. What was he going to say? That he had a boyfriend? 

As they walked away Tom looked his way and gave him an apologetic smile. His heart cracked again at the sight of the love of his life taking the dance floor with someone else. She got to hold him close, in the middle of a crowded room, and nobody could say anything. His whole world stood out there swaying with someone that wasn’t him. 

Pete rarely cursed the world, god knows he had many reasons to, but he never did. He didn’t like to whine. But now? Under the tent covered tennis court? He could curse the whole planet. All because of some scared little people deciding that he couldn’t love who he wanted, he had to suffer for the foreseeable future. 

Not able to take anymore of this, he stood up and walked out of there. He was outside but he felt like he was suffocating from the lack of air going into his lungs. He stops when he knows he’s alone outside of the tent, far enough away that he won’t be bothered but not so far he can’t still hear the music playing softly in the background. 

He sits on a bench that’s barely illuminated by the moonlight, and lets himself wallow. He cries for his lost friend, he cries for his parent-less upbringing, and finally he cries for not being able to love out loud. He knows it’s probably the worst place ever to cry about these things, but he can’t help it. It’s like a dam broke and he was helpless to stop it. 

Vaguely in the distance he hears someone walking towards him, and he mentally prepares himself to lie his ass off as to why he’s crying. But when he looks up and sees that it’s just his boyfriend approaching he settles. There’s no hiding tears from Ice, it’s a lost cause.

“Mav? Baby are you okay?” When Ice gets closer Pete can see the look of deep concern on his face.

“No.” He said simply. Why lie to the love of your life? 

Ice embraces him in a tight hug the second he’s close enough. Maverick can tell he might be crying a little too. 

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t want to be rude. I-”

“Shhh, I know baby. I know. Still makes me sad that I can't dance with you like that.”

Ice pulls back and has a look on his face, a rare one of mischief. Distantly Mav can hear the opening notes to Etta James’ At Last, one of his favorites. 

“You can if we’re alone, do you see anyone around?” 

That cheeky bastard. “No, I don’t think I do.” 

Ice looks around for good measure and pulls Mav close, nose to nose, one arm around his waist, and the other gripping his left hand. He leads them in a somewhat sloppy waltz, but it’s quiet enough that he can hear Tom’s small embarrassed laughs so he doesn’t mind. They carry on like that for a minute, just soaking in the moment.

“This is dangerous Ice.”

“What, dancing with my lover?” He whispers that last word far too seductively for them being in public. 

“Yes, but us in general. We’re a dangerous game. Can you be okay with that? I know how you are with your rules.” He winked to try and lighten the conversation.

“I know, but you’re worth it to me. If it came down to it and I had to pick you or my wings? I’d pick you.”

Pete was speechless. Flying was their whole world. 

“You can’t really mean that Tom.”

Ice had a soft lovesick look on his face.

“But I do. With my whole heart.”

Pete tried not to get choked up, failing miserably. When he and Ice started dating he really didn’t know how long it would last. Like Ice had previously said, he really was a cowboy, he’d never been in a long term relationship like this before and wasn’t sure he had it in him. But after a while he started to realize that maybe Ice was a cowboy like him. Hardened by the world and all of its evils, but it seemed in the end they found each other and all of that changed. Ice’s boots had their home beneath Mav’s bed, and forever they would stay. 

“I hope you know that you’re it for me Tom. I’m never gonna love again.” 

Tom smiled, all watery, and kissed Pete hard on the lips. 

“Me too Mav. Me too.” 

They stayed like that for a while, in each other’s arms, relishing in this stolen moment. Pete was infinitely glad he decided to go to this wedding, it was exactly what they needed. 

                    ///

Over the years of their relationship, the pair danced a lot after that wedding. It was usually in the privacy of their home, with the kitchen radio playing in the background, but it was their little thing. Mav’s favorite though was at their wedding. It was 2011 and DADT had just been repealed, and they invited everyone they knew. Even Pete’s aunt Margie and cousin Emma, and her three grown children. They decided that they’d have their first dance as a legally married couple to the same song they had their first dance to, At Last by. Etta James. It was perfect. 

Swaying in that ballroom with his husband, Pete felt like his world was complete. He had locked down the most beautiful man on the planet and damnit if he wasn’t proud of himself. 

“Hey Kazansky?”

“It’s Kazansky-Mitchell to you.”

“Right, but I’ve just gotta say something.”

“Out with it then.”

“You really are a cowboy like me, aren’t you?” 

That got him a laugh he could listen to forever, would listen to forever. In that moment he decided that forever was the sweetest con. 

[xbunny-k]

The Actor & I: PART SEVEN – Is this our thing?

This is part SEVEN of a very long, SLOW BURN series on Austin Butler and a Production Assistant on set of Elvis (2022).

Masterlist here!

Anything italicized is main character’s thoughts!

Warnings: Fluff, eventual Spoilers for Elvis (2022), mild language (If i missed anything, please comment so i can add!)

Tags: @manddor @pumkiinpastiesies​ @its-funny-til-its-not​ @karamelcoveredolicity @butlerstyles @feral4austinbutler @mirandastuckinthe80s @emilykolchivans @atombombbibunny @francescababy (Let me know if you’d like to be added!)

Please, if you like this, share it, comment, like it and enjoy! xx

When my alarm goes off a few hours later, somehow, I’m not tired. I feel excited to see what the day brings. I go about my morning routine and get to the office a bit early. As I’m typing an email, my phone buzzes with a new text from an unsaved number. Damn, I need to save his number…wait Austin is texting me already… I smile to myself.

“How are you doing this morning? I’m tireddddd”

He’s asking me how I am??? AH. Ana calm down, it’s fine. He’s just being friendly. This is a work friendship.

“I actually woke up somehow not exhausted, but I’m waiting on it to hit me, hah. It’s funny I stayed up talking to you and now I’m working on things about you.”

I send the text, smile at my phone and put it down to get back to my email when my phone goes off with another text notification.

“Sounds like you’re always gonna have me on the mind :P what are you working on?”

I need to save his number…gonna save it as something other than his name. Hmmm… Mr. Presley

“Well Mr. Presley, I’m currently working on a list of available Elvis reels the studio has available to screen for you.”

As I hit send on the text, I worry maybe that was a bit too flirty? Am I crossing a line? I’m just being friendly, but maybe that was a bit much. Ana, this is your job and it’s still your first week.

My phone buzzes within minutes and my worrying turns to panic. What if he’s uncomfortable? What if he complains to my boss? What if I lose my job? Ana, you need to tone it down.

“Oh man!! Well that woke me right up. Maybe enough energy to get out of bed. If you’re free, I can call you tonight so we can discuss what footage is available before we meet up next week. I’d love to see anything as soon as possible if it’s footage I wouldn’t have access to from home.”

Why are my cheeks on FIRE? Ana, he just wants to call to discuss work… because y’all are work colleagues. Get it together and stop blushing. As I pull myself together, my phone buzzes with another text.

“That is if you want to use your free time to talk to me about work things…even though I guess I might just be work to you in general haha.”

Does he mean that in a way that maybe he doesn’t think of talking to me as work? Or… Ana, you’re just reading into it, stop. I pick up my phone to text back but stop to think of the best way to respond. I do want to assure him this is work, but that I also don’t think of talking to him as just work… I also can’t come across as flirtatious…this IS work, Ana.

“Talking to you never feels like work haha. Yeah, I’ll be free to discuss whenever! Workdays I usually don’t do anything after.”

I hit send thinking the message sounds friendly, but still professional. I get back to work after setting my phone to “Do Not Disturb” to avoid any distractions. And by distractions, I do mean Austin. While he is part of my job, I have a lot of tasks to complete that don’t involve me worrying if I’m flirting or not.

When I check the clock next, it’s almost 7:00 PM and I decide to get up to go let Alison know I’m going to head out, but she is headed out of her office towards the door. She stops by my desk making a comment about how she’s late for a dinner and we should head out. I follow her lead and hurry out to my car.

I head to the gym in my apartment building when I get home and hurry home to shower and make some dinner. When I lay on the couch to eat my dinner, I realize my phone is still on the “Do Not Disturb” setting. When I turn it off and look at my texts, I have…so many…unread messages. Mostly from my best friend, Kelsey, a few from my mom and then…three from Mr. Presley.

While I should open my mom’s messages or my best friend’s messages first, I quickly click on Austin’s thread to read the three texts he sent me while I was off the grid for a few hours.

“I’m glad you feel the same way. Talking to you feels like the opposite of work haha. I’ll text you later to see how your evening is going so I can give you a ring.”

“Does give you a ring make me sound 55 years old? I swear I’ve never said that in my life…I’m trying to sound professional over here.”

“How does 9 sound for me to “give you a ring?” Haha now I’m never gonna stop saying it.”

Why am I laughing so hard at these texts? I need a drink. I’m going crazy. This guy has too much charisma on top of good looks. This is dangerous. He’s technically your superior, Ana. Get a grip.

I get up to get myself a glass of wine when I realize I didn’t even text Austin back. I look at the time and it’s already 8:45. I run back to my phone on the couch and immediately start texting Austin back.

“Sorry I was MIA, had to put my work focus face on :P I know now it’s so late, but honestly whenever works when you’re ready to give me a ring, Mr. Presley”

As soon as I hit send, I lay back on the couch and it hits me how tired I am. I ran all day on caffeine and adrenaline, but now I’m just tired from the lack of sleep and the emotional highs of the last two days. I decide to take my wine to bed knowing this is a terrible idea as I may fall asleep without getting ready for bed. As I lay down in bed and dim the lights from my phone, I get a phone call.

“Hello Mr. Presley,” I giggle as I answer Austin’s call.

“Well, hello there Ana,” he chuckles back at me. “That was quite a greeting.”

“I feel better hearing you say that since I fell off my texting game today. Let me get my laptop so I can pull up this list for us to go through,” I say as I get out of bed.

“How was your day? Busy thinking about me,” Austin teases back. I giggle and before I Can say anything he cuts me off, “That giggle is going to get you in trouble one day.”

What does that mean! Why can’t I stop blushing? Wow, he’s going to think I’m weird just not responding.

“We’ll see if your threats hold up in person,” I giggle back. “Okay, I have my laptop, so do you want to start with movies, auditions for movies, performances or TV footage?”

That’s good, keep it professional, but friendly. You got this, Ana.

We spend the next few hours going through the footage list and noting what Austin would need to watch at a Warner Brothers screening room versus what he could take home to watch. We map out a loose schedule of what he plans on watching and when. Eventually, I cut him off midsentence, “Sorry, my laptop is about to die, let me get up and go to my charger. It doesn’t reach my bed.”

“Oh, you’re working from bed, must be nice,” he jokes. I immediately giggle back, “well my new boss keeps me working late so it’s the only way.”

Austin laughs pretty hard back, “Ana, I was laughing, but it’s almost 2:30 AM. I can’t keep you up super late two nights in a row. I should let you go.” I look at my laptop and realize the time, he’s right. I forgot how tired I was as soon as he called. Talking with him is just so easy…

“Is this our thing? Talking until we realize I have to be at work super early in the morning,” I joke back, and he laughs. His laugh is so warm, I hope he’s laughing with me and not at me…

“I think it’s going to be a thing for the next few months… maybe even years, Ana,” Austin says back sweetly, but firmly. He wants to talk to me late at night…for months? Years? Ana, for WORK. You’re WORKING together.

“Anything to help you be the best Elvis I know you can be. In the morning, I’ll send you all the notes alongside all the footage we went over. When we meet next week, we can start planning firm dates for the order you want to start watching this all in,” I firmly say back, but hoping he knows I’m over the moon happy that he plans on continuing our thing of late-night calls.

“Ana, I’m so grateful to have you as my partner in this. I already feel so much more at ease even though I’m still so nervous,” Austin says back softly. I feel the sincerity in his voice. It’s so comforting talking to him. I thought this last night, but it really feels like I’ve known him for years.

“Me too, Aus. It’s crazy I get to work with you on this amazing role, like I can’t believe it. I feel like you deserve someone more qualified than me…to be honest,” I say back bashfully. As soon as I say it, I wish I could take it back. The wine and lying-in bed while on the phone has put me too at ease.

I hear him sigh and I open my mouth to apologize as Austin says, “I’m gonna use your full name, but Anastasia, don’t doubt yourself. There’s a reason you were given this job and it’s because people believe in you, myself included. You’ve had this job two days and you’ve already done so much to help me when I didn’t even ask, you just did it all.” I hear him take a big breath and he quietly says, “I really mean it, I’m so grateful it’s you in this position and not someone else, Anastasia.”

If anyone else says Anastasia, I get so irritated, but Austin saying it… why do I like it?

“Aus, I’m gonna let the full name slide, because thank you. I needed to hear that,” I softly say back. I’m completely laying down and a bit emotional hearing this as I’ve had some imposter syndrome the last day working on something so exciting, something that’s been a dream for years.

“Ana are you falling asleep,” Austin whispers into the phone. I giggle, “maybe…”

He laughs and I swear I can hear him smile. “Anastasia, I’m gonna let you go to sleep so you can get through work tomorrow.” I smile to myself and honestly, feel a little sad. I don’t want to get off the phone with him. I wish we could just talk all night.

“Okay, fineeee. But you better be going to sleep too,” I joke back to him. He laughs and it makes my whole body feel on fire. “I’m not sure I’m gonna even get my phone on the charger I’m so tired. It didn’t hit me until now for some reason.”

“Me too, it just hit me and now I feel I’ve never been sleepier,” I laugh back. I feel like we’re both playing this “no you hang up” game and I’m not sure I’ve ever tried to stay on the phone like this. Austin giggles back, “Okay, I’m gonna text you in the morning to make sure you got up and got to work, Ana. Goodnight.”

“Goodnight Aus,” I say softly and hang up. My god, I think I’m in trouble…

[selemina]

Time for a thing I've never done on here: writting down my thoughts on a thing I like.

Today I am talking about the Dream SMP SEASON 1 Finale. (Hopefully I tagged it correctly, if not, SPOILERS AHEAD)

I started it with Tubbo. Incredibly gripping acting, he had such a hard time actually launching the nukes knowing Tommy would die. Jack being there, obviously dying to get it done so he could be rid of Tommy, but also trying to remain a friend for Tubbo, in his own goofy/rough way, was fantastic. And their conflict once the nuke launches put into light the core issue of the server : everyone wants peace, but grudges built up so high with no perspective, that now all that is left is harm. Harm, and trauma, and everything being taken from everyone by everyone else.

All everyone wants is for it to stop. Whatever it takes. Including if it means nuking the server, because the hurt built up on itself to this breaking point.

Them failing to reach Tommy was heartbreaking. Jack was barely starting to have hope to be with his friends again, Tubbo tried so hard to save Tommy, rather than keeping himself safe like he promised. But it was always going to be this way, wasn't it? He was always going to come running after his best friend.

I then went back to watch Jack's stream, set before Tubbo's, to get a full picture. There were already signs of hope from Jack that Tubbo might get away from harm (in his mind, Tommy) and get happier with him. So later when Tubbo re-defined what the harm was (Dream and Tommy's CONFLICT!), it helped Jack balance his opinion on Tommy, at least enough to try to save him to the very end, even when Tubbo had given up.

I don't think he forgave him just like that. But he understood that Tommy was hurting, and that was a part of why he did everything he did that harmed Jack.

And we find this same theme of understanding on Tommy's stream. Not FORGIVENESS, but understanding.

Desperate to hold Dream and Punz in place, Tommy had the right idea, to make them talk about themselves. Except this time he also had to listen, to pay attention. In case he could get new buttons to push to keep them there. And, through the frankly unhinged and evil talk, he did start to see it too : Dream had been hurting. Because of him, because of the mounting grudges, the escalation of pain and retribution. Again, the true plague on the server, and like everybody else, Dream had suffered from it.

His way to deal with it is bad : torture, experiments, mind games, revenge in every direction. Getting lost in his work, anything to look away from the pain and the loss. His road to immortality was his "nuke", his "after that we can be happy and free, so the cost now does not matter".

Tommy and Dream are very similar. But Punz and Tommy were both right in the previous stream : Tommy thinks too small, and Dream thinks too big. Tommy is selfish, and his scale is very human ; Dream has lost touch with that very human scale, and only sees concepts and greater things.

And they both hurt one another because of it. Tommy obsesses over the harm Dream dealt him, while Dream is too disconnected to realize how SEVERE the harm he's doing is, because "in the grand scheme of things it doesn't matter."

"I would have revived you." with a scoff, against a shaking "But it hurts...!"

And that, to me, is where the finale became incredible.

Tommy, selfish, self-centered Tommy, saw through the layers of pain. He empathised. He's been there, even if his way of coping was to curl up within himself and lash out, rather than disconnect from it to go play god. It would have been easy to keep going. Satisfying maybe, to push Dream in the lava and kill him. To be selfish again and only think of his own pain. But that is where Tommy really showed strength and growth : he UNDERSTOOD Dream. Not forgave him, no the harm remains, and it would take forever and an insane amount of good will to heal that... but Tommy had the strength to give the first bit of this good will to Dream.

Because someone has to break the cycle. Because if everyone wants peace, why can't they start to let go of the grudges, and gain perspective?

It demands an amount of vulnerability that is striking, to let go of grief and accept that you hurt someone. And to apologise for the harm done is even harder. It does not invalidate everything that happened : Dream still tortured and played with Tommy. Tommy still ambushed and killed Dream, dividing the server, and refusing to stay down.

But through this bit of good will and understanding, Tommy showed Dream that they could do something else but fight. They could talk. Dream's pain could be taken seriously, not just shoved far at the back of his mind and ignored. Tommy showed him that he could think BIGGER than himself... and that Dream could think smaller, think about himself on a human scale.

"It's not worth it, right?" "Why not? Tell me why not?"

Tommy, selfish Tommy, reached out. And Dream, hurt and dangerous Dream, agreed to come down and take his hand. A first step, for once in the same direction. For once with the same goal of peace. Not perfect, not easy, but human, so incredibly human!

And they never got the time to go further, because of the nuke. Tommy clearly regretted that, and apologized (in my opinion) for robbing both of them of more time to maybe heal finally. Because despite understanding and perspective, the consequences of the harm done still existed. And there was no way to escape it.

At least not on that server. That is where a lot of sentiments from many CCs come into play : comments, in and out of character, about how the smp is a violent, destructive place. Build a house out of wood and it will be burnt to the ground. Hide your belongings, expect to die, trust no one. The smp is like living under a constant state of terror. Despite Eret and Aimsey's efforts and first steps towards a better, sainer state for the smp, the damage is done, the grudges are weaved into the history of every block.

The only way is to start anew, with none of those grudges. Which means, none of those memories. A clean slate, to do better. A clean slate, to breathe again, and have fun. Something new, with this knowledge on understanding and perspective, that comes with age and experience.

Would I have loved to see Dream and Tommy continue to take time, carefully dancing around one another, balancing compassion and trauma to finally forgive one another and become friends? Fuck yeah! I live for that healing shit, for people learning to cope with how they hurt others and how they got hurt, for remorses and relapses, and the care and patience it takes to FORGIVE when the time is right and the growth is real! But do I think the CCs had time for that? No. And they were too many characters, and too shackled by history and their own personalities to all follow that path of healing. So taking this into account, YES starting over was a good move!

And if I know many are bitter about how "easy" that is, rejoice! We get to experience a new era! I have heard so much about "the begining times of the smp", we get to live it again now! New, different, the possibilities are endless! :D It's time for us as well to let go of the past and finally get what we wanted : peace and joy and something new!

I cannot wait to see what happens next! This finale was powerful and subtle, with layers of doom and sensitivity, it was human and emotional and full of despair and hope! Growth, so much growth, 2 years of experience! This next season is going to be fantastic, and I hope the CCs have fun with it regardless of what anybody online says! :D

[wormstacheangel]

Suptober Day 1: Harvest

wc: 1.7k tags: fluff with the side of tiny case fic, established relationship, spoilers but cw they are drugged with cider,

It was a long hunt. One that they accepted as their last one, but, of course, they can never sit still enough not to take an easy local hunt. By local, he means a two-day trip away, but still, they saved a couple of old folks from a ghost, which was fun. Dean sure enjoyed getting thrown around until Cas finally burned the dentures.

Like he said, long hunt.

They stayed at a nice little Airbnb overnight. During breakfast, their waitress told them of the Harvest Festival a town over. Cas was still a little bruised up, but Dean convinced him to go, at least to try their famous apple cider.

“We’ll make a day of it! Just me and you.” With that, Cas agreed, taking Dean’s waiting hand across the table.

The festival was lively when they arrived in the afternoon, with more people than they expected considering the small town they were in but apparently when they say famous they meant it. The tents lined up with food from funnel cakes, donuts, chicken, and some pumpkin spice beer that Dean chugged down even though it tasted like shit.

They eventually ended up with bags filled with treats and souvenirs to take home to the kids--Sam and Eileen fall into the kids’ category. They each held a bag while Dean held Cas’ hand tight in his own, dragging him around from seller to seller, buying and tasting as he went.

“We should start heading home, or soon you’ll be too full to drive.” Cas teased as Dean finished off their bag of apple crisps. “You think we’re feeding an army.”

“Considering how Jack eats, we might as well be.”

“He gets that from you, you know.”

They continued their banter as they made their way out of the festival and to the parking lot.

Then they were stopped by a woman wearing a volunteer pumpkin shirt, “Aw, leaving so soon? Don’t ya wanna stay for the fireworks?”

That quickly took Dean’s attention, brightening up his whole face so much that once again, Cas couldn’t find it in himself to refuse. Instead, earning himself a small kiss on the cheek as a thank you before being was dragged to the car to drop off their items.

Once back in the festival, they walked around until another volunteer told them about the amazing view of the fireworks at the middle of the corn maze.

“It’s a small maze, but in the middle is a little hill. So it’s usually first-come, first-serve. But I haven’t heard of anyone taking it as of now.”

Once again, Dean was easily hooked in and took Cas along for the ride. Not that he was complaining. He enjoyed watching Dean get excited over small things, things he wouldn’t have permitted himself to get excited for before. Of course, it helped when Dean hooked his arm around Cas’s waist to tug him close, whispering, “Ever kissed someone in a corn maze, Cas?”

“You know I haven’t, Dean.”

That did it for Cas. A promise of a spectacular kiss that will put the fireworks to shame.

At the entrance of the maze stood a cider cart, and Cas made a beeline for it. “I at least wanna be warm if you are going to make me walk around in the cold.”

“On the house.” The saleswoman winked at them, and something uneasy passed through them, but they ignored it as she motioned them to go right on in that the fireworks should be starting soon.

They took their hot cider and walked right in, taking hold of their hands as they walked through the maze in comforting silence. Watching the sky above them change from orange and pinks to the dark night sky.

When the maze opened up to a clearing, Dean started to run—taking the small space on top. It was tall enough to see over the cornstalk and watch the lights twinkle from the festival up ahead. They could even see groups of people exiting the maze from their left, and for a second, Dean wondered why they didn’t run into anybody on their walkover. It looked like a lot of people were going through the maze, but nobody passed them.

That thought was quickly dismissed as the first firework lit up the sky, cheers from the crowd echoed the loud boom, and Dean felt secure with an arm hooking around his shoulders to bring him in closer. So they sat there watching the firework show and polishing off their now cold cider until Cas couldn’t wait another second.

Gently, he turned Dean’s face just enough so they could start the kiss slowly. The snap crackle pop of the fireworks above their heads just kept lighting up the fuse between them until Cas asked for them to find another place to spend the night.

“Should we go now?” Dean kissed down Cas’s jaw, feeling the hastily nods instead of seeing it. “Okay. Okay, let’s go.”

They both stood up and took one last look at the view before they got down. Turning left, where they were sure they saw the other folks exit from before. Every few steps, they pulled each other for another kiss-- smiling into them like giddy newlyweds--until they started to realize they’ve been walking for way too long.

The fireworks had long been over, and they soon realized it was their only source of light. It soon became so hard to see anything that they didn’t dare let go of each other’s hands. They tried to go back to the hill to see if maybe they could see the trail from there, but it was like it never existed in the first place.

“Fuck!” They turned the corner to find another dead-end. “Isn’t this shit for children!”

“You know we haven’t seen or heard anyone in a while. Not since-”

“We came in here. I know. I was thinking the same thing earlier when we were on the hill.”

“Why didn’t you say anything then?”

“Cause you stuck your tongue in my mouth and impending doom took a backseat.”

They started to run, calling out for help as they did, but it only felt like they were going in circles.

Then Dean yelled, “Hallelujah!” When a flashlight shined into their faces.

“There you two are. It’s time to go.” The old man sounded so relieved to find them. He didn’t look sinister. He didn’t even make it sound like they were gone for that long. “You two okay?”

“Yeah. Yeah. We got lost, I guess.” Dean shrugged, watching as Cas stared ahead of him.

“Many people do. But they always find their way out, though.”

They followed the man out of the maze while Dean’s knuckles brushed alongside Cas’. They were listening to the man recite a memory when suddenly Cas tugged at Dean’s arm.

“Dean.” It was a shocking gasp.

“Cas?” Dean turned around to watch; Cas’s eyes rolled to the back of his head before dropping like a ragdoll. “Cas!”

And just like that, Cas was out to the world.

Dean fell to his knees to take Cas into his arms, but it was useless. He was heavy, and Dean’s body was starting to tingle, his muscles becoming weaker with every passing second.

“Don’t you worry about your little friend.” The man flashed his light on Dean’s face. Blinding him, but Dean kept glaring up at him. “Just like you, he won’t feel a thing.”

“What did you do to him?” He tried to growl, but it came out too breathless for it to be threatening.

“Same thing we did to you. Same thing we do every year to a couple of tourists.”

Dean could feel himself slipping out of consciousness, but he kept trying to shield Cas from whatever was coming.

“Don’t fight it, boy.” The man walked over to him, raising his flashlight high above his head. “Hate it when they struggle.”

And with a single hit, Dean was knocked out. Falling over Cas. Hoping that at least he gets killed first this time around.

Dean woke up again when he felt someone kicking his legs with little to no effort. His arms were numb, and he realized it was because they were pulled back and tied around some huge boulder.

“Dean?”

Dean recognized the voice and happily groaned out a complaint. “Hate small towns. Creeps. All of them.”

Cas chuckled in relief. “Glad you’re okay.”

Dean blinked a couple of times before his eyes focused, looking across from him to find Cas in the same position as him. Cas looked dirty, a few scratches on his face from being dragged, which made Dean furious—tugging at the ropes that hold him back from checking for any more injuries.

“Fuck! Shit! You okay? They hurt you?”

“Not as much as they did you.” Dean didn’t feel much pain besides the stretch on his shoulders and a raging headache. “I guess that’s not true. You have a swell on your head.”

“Yeah, well, I went down swinging. Unlike you.” Cas didn’t look amused, but he looked concerned. Dean followed his gaze, looking for an explanation or a way out. “I guess we’re either bait or dinner.”

“I’m used to being bait.”

“And I’m used to being dinner. Well, aren’t we a match made in heaven?” This time Cas glared, and weirdly enough, it made Dean relax a little. “Okay, so what’s the plan?”

The plan was simple, while Cas may not be a full-powered-up angel, he was still an angel. And he was stronger than an average human. So with a little more force, Cas had his arms free, rubbing his wrist while shrugging at Dean, “I always see humans do this.”

“Yeah, cause it hurts, so if you can just-” Dean motioned for his arms and Cas quickly reached to untie him. Then, when they were both free, they once again started to look around the empty cornfield. “I say leave now and call for backup; come back in the morning.”

“Considering we have no weapons, I think that would be for the best.”

“So much for date night.” Dean took Cas’s hand, and they quickly started to get themselves out of there. Running like maniacs as they pushed through the endless corn.

“I actually enjoyed myself today. You know, before the whole being drugged and left for dead part.”

“Really? That was my favorite part.” Dean joked, squeezing Cas’s hand as they made their way to safety. “You think all the stuff we bought was drugged?”

“Won’t stop me from having another donut.”

“Man, I love you.”

[cali-holland]

An Irregular Romance ★ Harrison Osterfield One Shot

Pairing: Harrison Osterfield X Reader

Summary: Over five years ago, Harrison followed his heart (a.k.a. you) to drama school, and the day he asked you out was the day he discovered you had a boyfriend. He thought that part of his past was behind him, but then he was cast as Leo in The Irregulars and you were cast as Bea. Romance and shenanigans ensue as he tries to navigate the resurrection of his crush on you.

Word Count: 10k

Warnings: spoilers for The Irregulars, swearing, drinking (reader gets v drunk at one point), cheating boyfriend + “open relationship” drama

Masterlist in bio

*Gif is not mine

A/N: inspired by harrison literally saying he followed the girl he liked to drama school but she didn’t like him back; the drama school is the brit school (idk if that’s what he was talking about but age wise it works better); also darci is 18+ in this fic bc it just fits better to make her around their age; plus i had to re-post this bc the tags didn’t work so rip

also just like to say a massive thank you to @duskholland​​ for proofreading this for me :) you’re the best! this fic would be missing 90% of its commas if it wasn’t for you lmao

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Harrison had been buzzing with excitement all week. While he knew for sure that he had landed the role of Prince Leo in The Irregulars, he had no idea who the other cast members were. His agent learned from Netflix that they’d announce the cast on Saturday, so now here he sat, anxiously awaiting the news as he drank another pint with his good friends.

“Anything yet?” Tuwaine asked, refreshing his Twitter timeline.

“Nope.” Harrison said with a shake of his head as Netflix’s Instagram page remained unchanged as another minute went by.

“Maybe they’re announcing it at midnight.” Tom shrugged, trying to be useful to ease his friend’s nerves.

“Everyone would be asleep.” The blond replied before taking another long drink of his beer.

“Well, congratulations whenever they officially announce it.” Harry stated, standing up with his empty glass. “Next round’s on me.”

The conversation began to wander off, and Harrison found himself deep in thought, pondering his mysterious, new castmates. Would he like them? Would they like him? Were they big names or no names? Were they people he had screen-tested with (because, truthfully, he only screen-tested with a few girls, but even then, he didn’t screen test with all of the potential actresses)? As he got stuck, trying to think of someone he’d actually liked when they screen-tested together, he was snapped out of his thoughts by Tom yelling.

“It’s up!” Tom held his phone in the middle of the table as he, Harrison, Tuwaine, and Harry, who was now back with more beer, looked over the cast. A sense of pride soared through the group at Harrison’s picture and name being on the official Netflix page for The Irregulars. Harrison read over the other names, wondering if he knew any by happenstance. Just as he recognized one name in particular, Tom spoke up.

“Y/N Y/L/N? Isn’t that the girl you fancied in drama school?” Tom asked with a smirk. His smirk seemed to widen as Harrison blushed a deeper shade of red.

“No, no, no!” Harrison grumbled, taking out his phone to look over the post for himself because maybe, if he looked from his own account, the cast would magically change. When he looked at your name and picture right beside his, realization hit him. He slumped over, putting his head down on the table regretfully.

“I’d nearly forgotten about Haz’s girl that wasn’t his girl.” Tuwaine joked.

“Wait, what girl?” Harry questioned, out of the loop.

Perhaps the stupidest but best choice Harrison had ever made in his life was following you, his biggest crush, to drama school. Why his mother even let him chase after a girl like that was beyond him; he thought she should’ve advised him against it, but with the whole “follow your heart” attitude, his mum was his biggest supporter. He did his best to impress you, to get you to notice him, but you were unfazed by him. The day that he finally got the courage to ask you out was the day that he learned you’d had a boyfriend for the past two months.

Though he didn’t get the girl in drama school, he actually enjoyed it, and look where he ended up now— a new Netflix show was on the horizon for him. Despite the fact that he was (and still sort of is) crushed and embarrassed by the fact that you (very kindly) rejected him five years ago, drama school turned out to be a blessing.

“Harrison, here,” Tom laughed as he clapped his friend’s shoulder as Harrison still didn’t lift his head from his pitiful position, “thought he’d pursue acting because Y/N wanted to be an actress. He didn’t realize that in order to get her attention, he’d have to actually talk to her.”

That was enough to make Harrison lift his head, eyeing his friend questioningly. Cutting Tom off, he defended himself, “What do you mean? I did talk to her.”

“Right— you’d have maybe one conversation with her every three weeks.” Tom turned back to his brother, “Anyway, Haz finally asked her out and, turns out, she’d been dating this other guy for months.”

“Whatever. I only asked her out because you and Tuwaine shoved me into her. Maybe she doesn’t even remember me.” Harrison pulled out his phone to check over Netflix’s Instagram, wanting to see for himself the new cast again. When he opened the app, it notified him of all the new followers he had gotten, and, with one glance at the list of names, one account stood out to him.

‘@yourusername started following you’. Harrison let out a sigh, not wanting to dwell on this any further.

“She works fast.” Harry teased, looking over the blond’s shoulder.

“We’re co-stars now. She probably followed everyone else too.”

As if on cue, a new notification came through his Instagram— ‘@yourusername sent you a message’. With bated breath, he opened it to see the message that confirmed his worst fear— you remembered him.

‘Hey stranger! How have you been?’

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With every passing day, Harrison’s excitement for this new big project grew… but so did his dread about seeing you again. He wasn’t entirely sure now as to why his gut was filled with butterflies mixed with anxiety just thinking about you. You were only ever nice to him, both before and after he asked you out. It all led him back to the same conclusion that he still had a thing for you, but yet again, maybe it’s just life that your first real crush always has some power over you.

As he walked down the strangely long hallway to the conference room, he adjusted the collar of his letterman’s jacket. Today was the big day— the first table read for The Irregulars, and the first day he’d be confronted by you after all these years. Just on the other side of this door, his co-stars and the main production crew were waiting. Everything was real now; production would start in just a few days.

With one last nervous breath, he pushed open the heavy oak door and entered the room. People were chatting as they sat around the large conference table, which had small name cards at each seat. Harrison’s eyes found you almost immediately. You were locked into a conversation with your co-star, Darci, seated to your left for the table read. To your right was one of the last available seats, and Harrison’s name was on the little card on the table. All hopes of being unnoticed by you were instantaneously gone as he took his seat beside you.

“Fancy seeing you here.” You said to Harrison with a laugh, and he was instantly reminded of how that laugh basically drove him to where he was today.

“How long has it been?” Harrison asked, trying to play it cool like he hadn’t been rehearsing this day in his mind for the past several months.

“Far too long.” You smiled.

As the last few people trickled into the room, introductions flew around the table as everyone met their new coworkers. After a cold read-through of the script and a few words from the show’s creator, the table read was deemed over. Just when Harrison thought he was free to forget about your existence for a few more days, you pulled him aside.

“Hey, Darci and I were going to get drinks with McKell and Jojo. You should come.” You offered, and Harrison chanced a glance across the room to where Darci was chatting with your other two main co-stars.

“Uh, yeah, sure.” Harrison replied. He cleared his throat before giving you a definite nod that yes, that’d be a great idea.

“Perfect.”

And just like that, the five of you made your way across town to a pub. Darci had chosen the spot, explaining that it was the best place for drinks in Liverpool, and, seeing as she’d lived there her whole life, none of you tried to argue with her.

Harrison felt a strange pit in his stomach as everyone talked and laughed over some beers, as if you weren’t all strangers a few hours ago. His eyes always seemed to land on you and your contagious smile. You looked almost exactly how he remembered you, and you still were the same happy, go-lucky girl he’d fallen hard for. It was crazy to him how quickly you gave him butterflies, how effortlessly you made him feel like a silly schoolboy all over again. He couldn’t help but wonder if you thought he’d changed since his school days, too… or if you even thought about him enough to notice. So far, you’d made no indication that he was anyone besides an old friend from drama school, making him hope you didn’t remember that dreadful day.

As you and Darci excused yourself for a bathroom break, Harrison gave himself a little reminder that he was meant to be getting to know all of his co-stars right now and wasn’t meant to be focusing so intently on you. He took another sip of his beer, turning back to Jojo and McKell.

“So how do you and Y/N know each other?” McKell asked, and Jojo tried to hide his shit-eating grin behind his beer.

“Drama school, a few years ago.” Harrison replied, trying to play ignorant.

“Ah, so it’s a schoolboy crush, then?” Jojo questioned teasingly.

Harrison felt his face heat up. Jojo and McKell were practically strangers to him, and they already knew. He was cornered, “Is it that obvious?”

“A little.” McKell said while Jojo simultaneously replied, “Very.”

“Just ask her out.” Jojo encouraged.

“That’s the problem— I did.” Harrison replied, and both of their jaws dropped.

“No way. Did she let you down easy at least?” McKell’s voice was somewhere between a disbelieving, teasing, and pitiful tone.

Harrison scratched the back of his neck awkwardly, “Well, yeah? I mean she wasn’t rude about it, but it was still a bit awkward. She was dating this other guy at the time. He didn’t go to our school, though, so I had no clue about him.”

“That’s rough.” Jojo grimaced, before he gave Harrison a hopeful smile, “Maybe she’s single now.”

“I’ve been rejected by Y/N once— I don’t need her to reject me a second time.” He shook his head with a small laugh to conceal his embarrassment. He took a drink of his beer, hoping that would calm his nerves a little.

“Incoming,” McKell said quietly, nodding in the direction of the bathroom.

“What’d we miss?” Darci asked as she slipped back into her seat. You remained standing to put your jacket on, both you and Darci completely unaware of the boys’ conversation.

“Nothing, just Jojo being an idiot.” McKell joked, to which his newfound friend just punched him in the arm, taking another long drink of his beer.

“I think I might head back to the hotel.” Your words were met with a collective groan from three of your co-stars— Harrison silently frowned as he sipped on his beer.

As your head was down to collect your things, Jojo swiftly kicked Harrison under the table. Harrison looked at him quizzically, sending him a “what the hell was that for” look. When his co-star just nodded his head encouragingly towards you, Harrison got the idea.

“I’ll walk you.” Harrison said, making you look over at him. Standing up from his seat, he insisted, “I was just about to head out, too.”

“Okay,” You smiled, still completely unaware of his interaction with Jojo.

After you all exchanged phone numbers and created a group chat lovingly titled “The Irregz”, you and Harrison left the pub. You fell in step together, walking along the sidewalk in the chilly Liverpool air back to the hotel that you’d all be staying at for the next few months.

“So what have you been up to since graduation?” Harrison asked you, his hands deep in the pockets of his letterman’s jacket.

“All sorts of things, really.” You shrugged with a smile, “I got a few TV roles here and there, did some modeling, but so far none of it has really stuck, so I’m hopeful that this will be a foot in the door. What about you?”

“The same as you, really, but, instead of shows, I’ve done some short films.”

“I see you’re still best friends with Tom.” You said in a teasing tone. Harrison felt an unusual, upsetting tug on his heartstring. Not noticing any change in his demeanor, you continued with a laugh, “It’s funny. I would’ve placed my bets on you being world-famous after graduation.”

“Me?” He questioned, surprised by your words.

“Yeah, you didn’t go to LAMDA for nothing.” You playfully nudged his arm with your elbow, and he felt his cheeks heat up once more. “Don’t be modest— I’m not wrong.”

“Can’t argue with that logic.” A laugh passed his lips, any previous bashful reservations slowly fading away.

Before Harrison could say anything further, your phone began to ring. You fished it out of your pocket and barely looked at the caller ID before sending it to voicemail. Your actions were fast, but Harrison still caught the name of who was calling, Davey, followed by a red heart emoji. And that’s when it hit him— you were still with the same boyfriend from drama school, all those years ago.

And just like that, Harrison felt a tsunami wave of heartbreak from drama school wash over him.

“Hey, Y/N!” Harrison called out as he stumbled his way over to stall you from leaving school. He had one hand holding onto his book bag strap tight enough that his knuckles were turning white, and he shuffled his other through his hair.

“Hey, is everything alright?” You asked, concerned at how nervous he seemed.

“Yeah, um, well, tonight’s opening night for West Side Story, and I was wondering if you wanted to go with me? I know it’s your favorite play, and it’s one of mine too, so, yeah, I thought maybe we could go together?” He was sure that he’d never sounded so unsure of himself. Truth is, he didn’t want to ask you out right now, but Tom and Tuwaine had quite literally shoved him in your direction, physically encouraging him. He felt rushed and unprepared.

When you smiled so captivatingly and softly at him, he felt his racing heart speed up even more. Was this it? Was he really going to take you on a date? He thought to himself. His hopes weren’t up for long as you spoke up, “I can’t. I’ve already got tickets for tonight. I’m going with Davey.”

“Davey?”

“My boyfriend.” You replied, a hint of guilt in your voice.

His heart shattered. The only reason he was here, at this school, was because of you, and now he just had all of his hopes for any future dates with you thrown out the window.

“You and Davey are still together?” Harrison wondered aloud as you two arrived at the hotel.

“Yeah,” Your response was hesitant and quiet. He knew why— there was that elephant in the room between the two of you.

Before he could stop himself from mentioning it, he blurted out, “You don’t have to feel guilty about it, you know.”

You paused, watching unsure as he ran a hand through his hair nervously. “I kinda wonder what would’ve happened if I had said yes. Davey and I didn’t even end up seeing  West Side Story, anyway, so I wonder if you and I would’ve ended up any differently.”

It wasn’t much, but his heart sped up ever so slightly— so you had thought about him, even in the dating context. Harrison couldn’t think of a response (his brain repeated “fuck Davey, ask her out again”) fast enough as you stopped at the front desk. You mumbled something about needing some towels, and Harrison took that as his cue to just continue walking. He bid you a quick farewell, wanting to escape to his room as fast as possible.

Nothing you had said tonight had been particularly flirty, but he still rewound the events in his head because maybe he missed something. As he laid down in his bed that night, his mind drifted off with thoughts of you, wondering just how he’d manage to pull off these next few months without falling for you all over again.

Over the next several weeks, his predicament only seemed to grow. Spending so much time with you (and your other three co-stars) just made Harrison wish even more that he’d asked you out sooner in drama school, and having to spend most of his screen time gawking over you added to it further. Maybe it was another school boy crush, or maybe it was intense method acting— either way, he definitely liked you.

Ever since he read the script for episode four, he knew that eventually your two characters would become romantically involved. He would’ve felt giddy over the thought (because his eighteen-year-old self would’ve died at this opportunity), but whenever he thought of the scene, he was reminded about your boyfriend. Harrison wasn’t the type of guy to hate his crush’s boyfriend, but something just didn’t seem right about Davey.

Harrison was lying on his hotel bed, reading over the episode’s script for what must have been the fifth time through that afternoon. It was Sunday, the day before you’d both film Leo and Bea’s kiss. With a beer on his side table and an array of highlighters beside it, he was set. As the words started to run together, and his glasses began to feel uncomfortable on his nose, he heard a knock at his door.

“Coming!” Harrison called out. Setting his script aside, he rolled off the bed. He was confused at who could possibly be at his door, but, figuring it was someone from set, he had the decency to slip on a white t-shirt, opting for not answering the door in nothing but grey sweats. He was thankful for his last-minute decision as he opened the door and was met with you on his doorstep. Smiling at you and leaning on the doorframe, he let out a small, “Hey.”

“Hey, I was wondering if you wanted to rehearse tomorrow’s scene.” You offered with a friendly smile on your face.

“Right now?” He asked, glancing back into his room to decipher if it was clean enough or not.

“Oh, is this a bad time?” You replied, subconsciously stepping back. “Is someone here?”

“What?” Harrison looked at you, confused before it clicked what you thought, “Oh, no, no. There’s no one here. I was just rehearsing, too.”

“So is that a yes then or-?” You trailed off.

“Yeah, come on in.” He opened his door fully, allowing you to step in. He chivalrously closed the door behind you. “Would you like water or anything?”

“Can I have a beer?” You asked, spotting the one on his nightstand.

“Sure.” Harrison nodded. While he got you a beer and grabbed his own half-consumed bottle and script, you settled on the couch with your pages in hand.

“Thank you.” You smiled as he handed you the beer, and you took a sip happily. “You know, I’m honestly so jealous of you this week.”

“Why?” He asked with a laugh, thrown off guard by your confession.

“You get to do all the palace scenes again.”

“I also throw myself off a balcony.”

“But still.” You insisted. “Leo really needs to sneak Bea into the palace just so I can have one of those extravagant ball dress scenes. I just want to feel like a princess, and I feel like it’s what Bea deserves.”

Harrison looked at you admiringly for a moment. “You are a princess.” His face dropped as soon as he realized he’d said his thoughts aloud. Coughing, he tried to cover it up, “I mean—- you were kind of princess-like in episode 3, right?”

“Smooth.” You laughed, but didn’t press the situation. Your phone began to ring, and Harrison watched as you rolled your eyes, declining the call and ultimately silencing your phone.

“Spam call?”

“More like clingy non-committal somewhat boyfriend.” You stated, rolling your eyes.

He furrowed his eyebrows, confused. You hadn’t mentioned Davey in the past few weeks— not that Harrison was complaining, but he just assumed you were private about your personal life. “I thought you and Davey were on good terms?”

“We are? I don’t know.” You sighed, taking a sip of your beer.

“If you’re not comfortable with the topic, we can just rehearse-”

“No, it’s fine. I just haven’t really talked about it with anyone. Before I came here, he asked about having an open relationship while I’m away, and I told him no. And the last time we talked, we got into an argument and that was a couple days ago. I’m not ready to talk to him, and at this point, I’d much rather talk to you than him. It’s very frustrating that he wants to have an open relationship, but he still expects me to be at his beck and call. It’s like he’s looking for someone to substitute me, but I can’t have a life of my own. He wasn’t the most supportive of me taking this job in the first place, too.” You paused, with a small shrug, “I know you’re probably thinking I should leave him, but I can’t. We’ve been together for 5 years. I don’t know anything else at this point.”

“I get it.” Harrison said softly, hesitantly resting a comforting hand on your knee. “He was your first love. It makes sense that it’s hard to move on.” He felt his own heart sink at his ironic words. After all, you were his first love.

“I wouldn’t say he’s my first love.” You said softly, placing your hand on his, squeezing it gently. “Plus, at this point, I wouldn’t even say I love him.”

A silence fell in the room. Harrison really didn’t know what to say now. He would have told you to leave him, but you already knew that, so what was the point in him repeating it? Besides, it was your relationship, and you needed to make the decision for yourself… or let Davey make it for you.

“Let’s go through the scene, yeah?” You asked, changing the topic. You dropped his hand to pick up your script again.

“Right.” Harrison mumbled to himself, flicking through the pages to the scene.

You glanced around his hotel suite for a moment, looking for something similar to a bridge rail to lean on. “Should we use the kitchen counter? As the bridge rail?”

“Yeah, that works.” He nodded. The two of you got up, scripts in hand. Harrison stood to your right, just as the stage direction had called for. There was some space between the two of you, enough room for Harrison to shuffle closer to you later, as scripted.

“You’re not on your own, Beatrice. You must remember that.” Harrison said to you, leaning on the counter but looking over to you with his icy blue eyes. “You’re very different to anyone I’ve ever met.”

“What do you mean?” You asked, looking at him curiously.

“You have something about you.” He started, awkwardly.

You cut him off, “Like a smell?”

“No, like a quality.” He chuckled softly before continuing, “I don’t know what it is, but I really like it.”

“Well, when you think of it, let me know.”

“I’ll be sure to.” He smiled at you, his confidence slowly building as the scene continued on. Harrison stepped closer to you until he was right beside you, leaning sideways on the counter. “And I’m not saying you don’t smell, by the way. I’m just saying that that’s not the thing.”

You laughed, turning your head away from him in disbelief. “You know, I was thinking of kissing you, but now I’m not gonna.”

Harrison paused, taking a moment to mentally hype himself up for what was about to happen, but also taking a moment because it was scripted for Leo to be nervous. “Well, uh, I suppose I have to kiss you then.”

You turned to him, smiling coyly. Slowly, Harrison closed his eyes and leaned in. His heart started racing faster as he felt your breath fan against his face before his lips finally found yours. It was gentle and hesitant, everything that it had been scripted to be. As much as he wanted to keep kissing you and keep tasting the sweet strawberries of your lipgloss, it had to end. He pulled away after a moment, and you seemed almost breathless as you opened your eyes to see him again.

“I meant it when I said you’re not on your own.” Harrison looked at you with more hesitancy this time, but he still kissed you with the softest passion. The script said that Leo and Bea kiss and continue to kiss for a few seconds; Harrison wasn’t counting, but he was sure this kiss was longer than it was meant to be. Again, he found himself dreading its inevitable end. If there was one thing he could do for the rest of his life, it’d be this… well, this amongst other things with you. His stomach started to stir with guilt as he remembered Davey; you were still technically in a relationship, open or not, arguing currently or not. But then it clicked with Harrison, you weren’t pulling away— no, you were fully kissing him back.

Before he could pull away and end the scene with his last few lines, a knock came from his door. Regretfully, he stepped away from you. He didn’t meet your eye as he went to answer the door while you read over the script on the counter. Flustered, he opened the door.

“Mum! You’re here.” Harrison’s eyes went wide, surprised to see his mother and his sister standing before him.

“Surprise!” She smiled, hugging him almost immediately. “We had to come and see you at your big job.”

“Are you not happy to see us?” Charlotte teased, and Harrison shook his head, pulling her in for a hug. As they all stepped into Harrison’s apartment, you waved from the kitchen.

“Hi.” You smiled, coming over to introduce yourself.

“Oh, mum, Charlotte, this is Y/N. Y/N, this is my mum and Charlotte, my sister.” Harrison introduced the three of you.

“You’re Y/N Y/L/N from drama school?” Phil said with a smile, making the connection as you shook her hand. Charlotte seemed to stifle a laugh as Harrison’s cheeks heated up.

“Yes, that sounds like me.” You laughed, brushing off any awkwardness that Harrison feared was there. “We were just rehearsing our scene for tomorrow.”

“Maybe we can come to set.” Phil suggested, sending Harrison an expectant look.

“I’ll have to ask. This is so, so last-minute, though, so I don’t know.” He replied.

“It’s a spontaneous weekend trip.” Charlotte clarified.

“We should get some dinner. We haven’t eaten much all day.” Phil told Harrison before turning to you, “Y/N, you should come, too. It’d be so lovely to get to know you.”

“Oh, I don’t know.” You trailed off, glancing at Harrison. He sent you a silent look that said ‘she seriously does want you to come… If you don’t come, I won’t hear the end of it’. “I’d love to. I just need to go change first.”

You grabbed your script off the counter, and Harrison walked you to the door. “How long do you need?”

“Like 10 minutes?” You replied, and he nodded.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know they were coming, or that they’d invite you to dinner.” He said quietly, making you laugh.

“It’s fine, but I do have to warn you, if my parents spontaneously drop by, they don’t know who you are.” You teased.

He let out an embarrassed groan, “Let’s not talk about that.”

“See you in ten.” You sent him a wink before leaving to your own hotel room. As Harrison closed the door and turned back around, he was met with the smirking faces of his mother and sister.

“So, is there anything you want to tell us?” Phil asked.

“We were rehearsing. That’s all.” Harrison insisted, going through the wardrobe to find some clothes to change into for dinner.

“Huh,” Charlotte trailed off, crossing her arms. “So, you wearing sparkly lip gloss that matches Y/N’s is a coincidence?”

“It’s a kiss scene tomorrow. We rehearsed the lines and the kisses, too.” He explained. With a pair of jeans, a clean shirt, and his red letterman jacket in hand, he made his way to the bathroom.

“Oh, multiple kisses.” She teased, making him roll his eyes.

“She has a boyfriend!” Harrison ended the conversation, closing the door to the bathroom.

Ten minutes later, you returned back to Harrison’s room, and the four of you left, making your way to an Italian restaurant nearby. You and Harrison shared anecdotes about filming so far, keeping spoilers to a minimum until the server came with your food.

“We got in so much trouble from the makeup and hair department.” You laughed as Harrison finished telling them of how you two went on the playground last week, much to the chagrin of the crew.

“It was worth it.” He added.

“Who would’ve known you’d play a Netflix prince?” Charlotte asked teasingly, but it was clear she was still proud of his achievements.

“Look at that face. He couldn’t play anything but a prince.” You joked, and he smiled smugly.

“I’ll take that as a compliment.” He stated.

“Phil, I have to say, I’ve never met someone more well suited to play a well-mannered prince.” You told her, playfully pinching Harrison’s cheek beside you.

“I remember when there was a time he was revolted at the idea of playing a prince.” Phil said, her lips growing into a smirk, and Harrison knew exactly what that meant.

“Mum, no—“ He started, but you just shushed him, wanting to hear whatever embarrassing story was about to be told.

“He watched a single Batman movie growing up— and not even a good one at that, and decided he simply had to be Batman.” She explained. “Then the Christopher Nolan ones came out, and there was no stopping him.”

“Every kid wants to be a superhero, and Batman is simply the best one.” He said as if it was obvious.

“I didn’t know you had a Batman phase.” You teased.

“Phase? He still has posters and comic books and dolls.” Charlotte added.

“Action figures.” He corrected her, making you laugh at the humor of it all.

“You know, honestly, I think I still have Catwoman action figures.” You admitted, trying to make him feel better, and Phil’s eyes lit up as she remembered another story.

“I cleaned your room a couple weeks ago, Harrison, and I was surprised to see you still Anne Hathaway as Catwoman posters.”

“Do we really have to talk about that? Does this torture not end?” He groaned.

“Fine. That’s enough for tonight.” Phil let out a defeated sigh, clearly enjoying herself.

“Y/N, if you want the really embarrassing stories, you’ve got to talk to Tom. He’s told me embarrassing Harrison stories that I can’t say in front of mum.” Charlotte laughed, and Harrison’s eyes nearly bulged out of his head at his sister’s words.

“I’ll keep that in mind.” You smiled coyly.

“Sometimes, I wonder if he forgets that I know just as much embarrassing shit that he did growing up, too.” Harrison stated, shaking his head.

The night went on with minimal embarrassment on Harrison’s end. After Phil and Charlotte went back to their hotel, you and Harrison started the walk back to your own hotel. As you walked, your hands would brush against each other’s every so often, but neither of you made any move to take it further.

“Darci’s going to be so jealous in the morning.” You said, making him laugh a little.

“Why’s that?”

“That’s her favorite restaurant in town. Plus, I just got a free meal.” You laughed. A visible shiver coursed through you as the chilly night air picked up.

“Are you cold?” Harrison asked, already taking off his letterman’s jacket.

“Thank you.” You replied, taking his offer of warmth. Your short sleeves did nothing to shield you from the cold, but he had at least been prepared enough with long sleeves. “Are you sure you won’t get chilly?”

“I’ll be fine.” He reassured you.

“I had a really nice time tonight. I’m glad your mum invited me.” You admitted happily.

“Me, too. Apart from all of the embarrassment I just went through, I enjoyed tonight.”

“I never knew you had a secret Batman fanboy side.”

“I never knew you had a secret Catwoman fangirl side.” He countered with a smile.

“Guess that means we make a good team, huh?”

“Yeah, I guess it does.”

As you smiled at him, completely content under the moonlight, he wanted nothing more than to kiss you right then, to taste the sweetness of your strawberry lip gloss again. The last bit of your walk was filled with you two arguing over Batwoman and Catwoman, two things that neither of you had ever realized you had in common before.

Harrison’s wish finally came true the next day, as you two ran through the kiss scene multiple times. It was strange at first for him, because his sister and mother were intently watching, proud to see him in action, even if it was just a kiss scene over and over again. But, with you there, he grew more and more comfortable with each take.

As a few more weeks passed by, Harrison thought that perhaps you and Davey had officially ended things, but then he heard through Darci that you had magically worked it out. Whatever magic it was, he was upset about it, and he found himself increasingly irritated at the mention of Davey.

“Ooh, we finally get to meet the Davey tonight?” Darci asked as the five of you enjoyed lunch in between shots. It had been two weeks Harrison’s mother and sister visited, and now Davey was coming, much to Harrison chagrin.

“He’s only here for two days.” You explained, taking a bite of your sandwich.

“Ah, so you’ll be very busy, then.” McKell teased, suggestively nudging your side with his elbow. You brushed off his comment with a laugh, avoiding Harrison’s eyes.

“We should get him to do that calzone challenge with us.” Jojo said to Harrison. Although Jojo and McKell had been rather supportive of Harrison’s interest in you at the beginning, they seemed to forget about it most of the time now— for which he was actually kind of grateful.

The conversation couldn’t go any further as the director came into the room, holding the script in his hands. The look on his face told all of you that something was up. He looked between you and Harrison before speaking, “Change of plans for tomorrow. Eileen isn’t feeling well, so we’ll film Bea and Leo’s scene tomorrow instead of her scenes.”

“But tomorrow was supposed to be—“ You started, but cut yourself short, realizing there was no point in arguing. Schedules, plans, things all change, and this was just part of the job. “Never mind.”

“Well, tomorrow will be interesting.” Darci said quietly, voicing what was on everybody’s minds.

The director left with a silent nod, and the room fell silent for a moment. You and Harrison wouldn’t dare to look at each other, both of you feeling awkward suddenly. Making out with Harrison multiple times, especially with your boyfriend there, was not something either of you particularly enjoyed the thought of.

Having to film no more scenes today, Harrison went back to the hotel with Jojo and McKell. He didn’t end up seeing you for the rest of the day, but he was okay with that as he wanted to go as long as he could without meeting Davey. The director had taken some pity on the two of you, asking you to come in later in the morning instead of at 6 AM like usual.

Harrison made his way down to the hotel gym, wanting to utilize his newfound free time. Normally, he’d get his daily workout in after filming, but he didn’t see a reason to not get an early start today. He didn’t expect anyone to be up this early, but as he got closer to the gym, he could hear a voice coming from inside the room, the door cracked just slightly.

“Love, I promise I’ll be back in two days.” The stranger paused before continuing, “You know I’m only here for business, nothing else.”

Curious and trying to decide if he should even enter the room, Harrison snuck a quick glance through the crack in the doorway. He felt his blood run cold as he immediately recognized the guy sitting on the weight bench. Afterall, Harrison had looked at your social media enough to recognize your olive-skinned boyfriend, Davey.

“Bit early for you, isn’t it?” Harrison nearly jumped out of his skin at the sound of your voice from down the hall. He heard Davey mumbled something on the other side of the door, probably having heard your voice too.

“Yeah, but I just figured I’d start my pull-ups early today.” He replied before opening the door for you, acting like he had no clue that Davey had been in there.

“Hello, gorgeous.” Davey said to you, completely ignoring Harrison. He stood from his spot at the weight bench to wrap his arms around your waist and kiss you possessively.

“Davey, this is Harrison, he plays Leo. Harrison, this is Davey.” You introduced the two guys.

Davey looked Harrison up and down with his dark brown eyes and seemed to stand straighter, even though the blond was inches taller. Harrison was the first to step forward and politely outstretch a hand to the raven-haired guy before him. With a tight smile, Davey shook his hand, “Nice to meet you.”

“Likewise.”

Davey turned back to you, “Spot me?”

“Actually, I wanted to-” Your eyes drifted over to the treadmill as Harrison got in position to start his pull-ups at the bar. Davey looked at you expectantly, and you nodded, silently agreeing to stand there and spot Davey while he bench pressed.

Slipping on his headphones and turning on some music, Harrison began his workout. He played his music loud enough to block out your conversations with Davey. Not only was it none of his business, but god, Harrison really hated everything about him already. Hearing silence between you and Davey when his song changed, Harrison spared a glance over towards you. He was surprised when he found your eyes trained on him or, rather, trained on his abdomen that seemed to stick out from his tight white shirt. Still unaware of his eyes on you, your own eyes trailed up to his arms, watching as they flexed with each pull-up. Feeling flustered by your fixed gaze, Harrison faltered a little, and your eyes immediately darted back to Davey in front of you. Harrison couldn’t help the proud smile that ghosted his lips as he continued— you were checking him out.

Harrison finished his workout and decided to get cleaned up before heading to set in half an hour, leaving you and Davey in the gym. When he left, he was surprised that you were still spotting Davey, getting no work out in like you had planned. The whole time he was getting cleaned up (and brushing his teeth repeatedly to ensure he had good breath), he just kept picturing your staring in his head. He had worked very hard to get his body in this shape, and he was very proud of himself too, but he was even prouder that you’d clearly taken notice. If anything, it almost excited him that they’d be filming this scene today. There were a few times in this episode specifically in which Leo is shirtless, but none of those scenes had been filmed— and if this scene was going to be anything like it was scripted to be, then you’d definitely get a better show than in the hotel gym.

He didn’t see you again until the two of you were on set, in full costume and makeup. He had a loose shirt on, but underneath it, his chest had been painted with blues and purples to make convincing bruises. As he went to his mark, Leo’s makeshift bed on the floor of the cellar, Harrison spotted Davey across the set, looking bored and unhappy. His blue eyes drifted over to you next, and he refrained himself from smirking as he noticed your makeup artist applying chapstick to your lips.

While you gathered your prop lantern and the lights dimmed around you all, Harrison made himself comfortable under the ragged blankets. The director called out “Action!” and Harrison closed his eyes, pretending to be asleep as he waited for you to come into the shot. Hearing your footsteps, Harrison stirred, blinking his eyes open.

“Bea, is everything alright?” He asked, looking up at you as you stood over him.

“Let me see your body.” You said definitively.

“Beatrice—” He started, but you cut him off.

“Show me, Leo. I want to see it.” At your words, Harrison shifted slowly, moving as if in pain. He pulled the blankets down and went to roll up his shirt. “Take your top off.”

He paused, looking at you questioningly with a hint of fear in his eyes. Groaning a little, Harrison sat up and removed his shirt. He looked at you expectantly, and you set aside the lantern before kneeling on the blankets beside him. Your hand drifted over the painted bruise tentatively, ghosting over the same abs that you had been studying just hours earlier. Harrison waited for you to deliver your next line, knowing he was scripted to kiss you after it. It felt like ages that he was waiting for you, wanting nothing more than to kiss you right now. His mind went blank as your eyes found his and you leaned in to kiss him.

It was unscripted, and he was surprised, but he didn’t let his surprise stop him from immediately kissing you back. Your chapstick tasted of strawberries, just as it had the last time the two of you had a kissing scene, and he swore he was in love with the taste of it. He expected to hear the director yell cut, to hear him question why you suddenly improvised, but when nothing came, he just continued to kiss you. You pulled back, a shy smile on your face, “I don’t want you to hide your body from me anymore. It’s too nice to be hidden.”

His heart leapt as he leaned forward to catch your lips once more, this time scripted. His hands shuffled to your waist, pulling you down to lay beside him as he rolled onto his side, his chest leaning over yours. Your fingers tangled into his hair, and he savored the feeling.

You pulled back again, whispering up to him, “No more hiding.”

“No more hiding.” He reaffirmed. As he continued to kiss you, his hands sensually wandered down your back, keeping you as close to him as possible. Part of him wanted to pause the intimate scene and pinch himself, just to make sure it was really happening, but he was worried if he stopped kissing you now that he’d never get the opportunity to kiss you like this again.

“Cut!” The director called, and Harrison reluctantly pulled away from you. He could’ve sworn a small frown passed your lips as he looked down at you, not having shifted off of you yet.

“Spearmint— my favorite.” You teased quietly, as if it was only for the two of you to hear. As you laughed underneath him, Harrison couldn’t help but wonder what his younger self would think if he knew he’d one day get to make out with Y/N Y/L/N. Even if it was just for the show, it was a sight that he’d always want to remember.

“I’ve always enjoyed the taste of strawberries.” He replied softly, rolling away from you.

The director ran you two through a couple pointers for the scene, and, to Harrison’s surprise, he even suggested Bea kissing Leo first, just like you had improvised. You reasoned that you forgot your line momentarily, but something about the way you kissed Harrison made him feel like that wasn’t the case; no, it seemed like you’d truly wanted to kiss him.

After running through the scene a few more times, the director was satisfied. While you stayed behind on set to film more scenes, Harrison returned to his hotel room. Just as he was searching his toiletry bag for some much-needed chapstick, his phone began to ring with a Facetime call. Seeing Harry’s contact photo light up on his screen, he accepted and set his phone aside momentarily. He didn’t need to wonder what Harry (and most likely Tom, Tuwaine and maybe even Sam) were calling about— he had made the dire mistake of telling his easily-excited best friends about today’s scene.

“Why are we looking at your ceiling?” Harry asked almost immediately.

“I’m, uh, looking for lip balm.” Harrison admitted quietly and smiled to himself when he found some. He quickly put it on and then grabbed his phone, heading to his bed where he could comfortably talk to his friends.

As expected, his friends let out an incoherent chorus of excitement. Sam seemed to calm down enough first to ask (more like, shout through the phone), “How was it?”

“Does she really kiss with tongue? Remember Jack used to say-” Tom started, and Harrison scoffed, hearing the name of one of their old classmates who swears he had a summer fling with you once.

“I still don’t believe him, but no, not today at least.” Harrison was honestly a bit embarrassed to admit it. You were in a relationship… with a possibly cheating moron, but still. It just didn’t feel right to talk about you in that way.

“Not today? So there could be another time!” Tuwaine shouted encouragingly.

“Is she still with that prick?” Tom asked.

“Yes, but,” Harrison paused, and they all looked at him expectantly, waiting for elaboration, “I think he might be cheating on her.”

“What makes you say that?” Harry questioned. “Mate, just because you fancy her doesn’t mean her boyfriend’s a cheater.”

“No, I mean I heard him on the phone, and he said he was in Liverpool for business, not for his girlfriend.” He reasoned, “I’m just very suspicious of him.”

“You should tell her if you think he is.” Sam stated, “If he isn’t, then, oh no, you’re on bad terms with her boyfriend, who probably already hates you after today. If he is, well, she’d hate you if she finds out you kept it from her.”

Harrison let out a small sigh as the others nodded. “I don’t know. It’s not my place. Besides, she said something a few weeks about him wanting an open relationship. Maybe it’s that?”

“Okay, look, forget I asked about him.” Tom said, shaking his head, while the others looked at Harrison skeptically through the phone, “How was it to finally have your drama school dreams fulfilled?”

“Fucking heaven.” Harrison admitted with a laugh.

For the next week, Harrison resisted the urge to tell you about Davey. He wanted to, he really did, but whenever he’d finally be alone with you and mentally prepare himself for the conversation, you would always just seem so happy and content. He couldn’t bring himself to disturb your happiness, especially when it was Harrison making you happy. After Davey left, it’s like something changed within you, and Harrison had no clue what it was, but he enjoyed it.

‘You have to tell her.’ Harrison read over his most recent text from Tom again. He let out a small sigh, trying to get the courage to tell you as you sat across from him at the booth.

It was Saturday, and you two, along with Darci, Jojo, and McKell, had made your way to a club, wanting to celebrate another week down. With only two episodes left to film, you all knew your time together was starting to run low. You were all a few drinks in by now, happily buzzed. Jojo and McKell were off somewhere, probably attempting to be each other’s wingmen. Darci was telling you a story so wild that Harrison wondered if it was even true. He finished the rest of his drink and shuffled out of the booth.

“I’m going to grab another drink.” Harrison said to you two, and, without waiting for a response, he left. He made no move to flag down the bartender, leaning against an empty spot in the bar. Pulling on the collar of his blue shirt, he started to feel hot, unsure if he could handle this.

“What happened to getting another drink?” You asked him, stepping up beside him.

“Where’s Darci?” He replied, not wanting to answer your question.

“Found a friend in the crowd.” You laughed and turned to flag down the bartender. You ordered a round of shots, to Harrison’s surprise.

“Are you good?” He asked skeptically.

“Yeah,” You nodded, but with how your eyes were glazed over the alcohol and another unreadable emotion, Harrison didn’t quite believe you. Playfully, you nudged him, “I should ask you the same thing. You’re the one who’s been moping all night for god knows why.”

“I haven’t been moping.” He argued as a tray of four shots was placed in front of you two. You handed one to him and took one for yourself.

“Cheers to another week done.” You clinked your shot glass against his before both of you downed them.

As you went to grab your second shot, Harrison reached a hand and stopped you. Concerned, he asked, “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Davey and I broke up— for good this time.” You admitted, and his hold on your wrist softened while he looked at you pitifully. “He told me when he was here that he went through with his ‘open relationship’ plan, even though I never agreed to it, so he’s been basically cheating on me since I left for this job. Then tonight, he drunkenly texts me, and I know it’s just a booty call. He’s done it for years, but now I actually see it for what it is. So now, my shitty boyfriend is gone, I’m finally single, and my only plans for tonight is to get properly drunk. Maybe even hookup with a stranger— god knows it’s been a while since I had decent sex.” Harrison was speechless, and you continued, a smile finding its way to your face at the end of your venting. “Dance with me after this shot?”

“Do I have a choice?” He asked playfully, feeling your mood lighten once more. You winked at him, handing him a full shot glass. He made a mental note to keep a close eye on you and to keep you from drinking anymore.

After you both drank back the burning liquid, you grabbed his hand and pulled him out to the dancefloor. Harrison had felt the alcohol that was flooding his system earlier, but the colored lights, pounding music, and countless bodies around him seemed to make the alcohol hit him harder. There was a weight off his shoulders, knowing you were actually single as you danced with him, and yet he still felt strange about his current state with you— were you truly into him or was he just the first guy you could drunkenly hook up with?

You turned to face him, a small frown on your face, “Haz, you’re being a bit of a killjoy.”

It was then that he realized, while you were fully grinding on his body, he was relatively motionless. Your hands found his, and you planted one on your hip and another on the small of your back, low enough though that it teetered being on your ass. You leaned in closer to him, letting him get a whiff of your perfume. While one of your hands trailed along the hem of his shirt, daring to even dip below his shirt, the other traced through his hair.

As you planted a kiss on Harrison’s neck, not caring at all for the dancing bodies around you, you heard him let out a strangled groan of your name. Your nails light scratched over the deep V in his hips, hooking onto where his jeans met the line.

“Should we get out of here?” You asked Harrison, your lips right next to his ear as your voice dripped with seduction. He felt his heart flip with intoxicating excitement before he was immediately reminded of the gravity of the situation. You went to kiss him, but he moved back quickly, stepping out of your reach. Pouting, you asked, “Do you not want me? After all this time?”

“No, I do.” Harrison insisted. “I want you, but not like this, not when you’re drunk. You’re not in the right headspace for this. I don’t want to be your drunken rebound.”

“How can you be a rebound when it’s always been you?”

Harrison sighed. Oh, how much he’d love to hear that from you— sober. He was saved from having to reply when Darci, McKell, and Jojo found you two. They looked at the two of you skeptically, but Harrison just shook his head.

“I’m going to take Y/N back to the hotel.” He said as he stepped closer to the group so that they could hear him over the music.

“We’ll come, too.” Jojo insisted, even though, with his words slurred and his eyes glazed over, he was thoroughly drunk, too.

“Where did Y/N go?” McKell asked, realizing your sudden absence.

“Oh god,” Harrison muttered, and the four of them dispersed in the crowd to find you, tripping over the other sweaty bodies. Darci found you first, unable to stop you from having a couple more shots.

“No, no, you’re done.” She argued with you. You reached for the last shot that she had taken from you, but, in your intoxicated state, you easily lost your balance. Harrison quickly wrapped an arm around your waist to hold you up.

“I don’t think she can walk.” Jojo commented.

“What gave that away?” McKell asked sarcastically.

“Come on, let’s get you home.” With a small sigh, Harrison, as the most sober of the group (though he still felt fairly tipsy), proceeded to lead you out of the club.

Darci hailed a cab for the five of you, and while it was an illegally tight fit, you all made it work. You leaned on Harrison as he was pressed right up against you. On your other side sat Jojo. You mumbled softly to Harrison, one of your hands falling onto his knee, “Do you remember that year when they put up mistletoe at school?”

“Where are you going with this?” He asked you softly.

“I saw you kiss Vivian at the one outside of the gym, and I couldn’t walk in that area for three months without thinking of you. I was so jealous of her, and you just looked like such a good kisser, which I’m happy to report you are.”

“Babes, maybe stop with the drunk talking.” Darci said, because all of you could tell this was stuff sober you would never say.

Harrison looked at you in surprise— he barely even remembered when Vivian dragged him under the mistletoe, so the fact that you remembered and were jealous? And you said he was a good kisser, too. He felt a glimmer of pride overcome him.

“Ask me tomorrow, it’s the truth.” You shuffled in your seat, laying your head against Jojo’s shoulder, “Jojo, wanna know a secret?”

“Y/N, maybe-” Darci started, but Jojo cut her off.

“No, go on, Y/N.” He laughed, wanting to hear your drunk thoughts.

“Do you think I’d make a good Catwoman?” You asked, words slurring together as you grew tired.

“Catwoman? Like Anne Hathaway?” He questioned, and you hummed a ‘yes’. “Yeah, you’d make a good Catwoman.”

“Good. Tell Haz he needs to my Batman then.” Your voice was quiet, as if it was something just meant for the two of you to hear, but your voice wasn’t nearly as soft as you had thought it was, meaning Harrison and the rest of your friends were truly aware of your little drunken secret

“Okay, I’ll tell him.” Jojo reassured you, a shit-eating grin on his face as he glanced over your head to look at the embarrassed Harrison.

The rest of the car ride was silent, and Harrison helped you out of your seat. With the help of the others, he got you safely inside your hotel room. Everyone retreated to their own rooms, except for Harrison who stayed with you. He laid you down on your bed and went searching for your pajamas, which to his luck were stowed underneath your pillow.

“Can you change or—?” Harrison asked, holding out the clothes to you

“I’ve got it, though I wouldn’t mind you helping.” You said with a wink. As you started to change out of your club clothes, Harrison turned away from you and focused on getting out some much-needed pain reliever and a glass of water for you to have in the morning. He heard you shuffle on the bed behind him before you let out a small huff, “Hazzy, can you come here?”

Hazzy— that was a new nickname. To his surprise, you were already tucked up in bed, your previously worn clothes scattered on the floor around you. He set the water and meds on your nightstand before kneeling to your level, “What’s wrong, love?”

“Do you know why Davey wasn’t my first love?” You asked quietly, your eyes beginning to droop with sleep. You reached a hand out to tentatively run your fingers over his cheek before you cupped it, smiling softly at him.

He had a hunch, but he played along anyway, wanting to hear you say it, in case he never heard it again. “Why?”

“Because you were.” Your voice was so quiet that he barely heard you, but he was so glad that he did. He leaned forward and pressed a chaste kiss to your forehead, and you let your hand fall from his face.

“Get some sleep. We can talk in the morning.”

“Can you stay tonight? Please?”

“Of course, love.” Harrison stood to his full height, and when he looked at you again, you were already asleep. He softly readjusted the blankets on your bed to make sure you were warm enough, before he made his way over to the couch. Grabbing a throw blanket off the back of the couch, he settled into his bed for the night. Just like every other night lately, he drifted off thinking of you, but this time, there was an excited flutter in his heart.

The next day, Harrison woke up to you letting out a groan, loudly asking, “Why the fuck is it so bright in here?”

He slowly sat up from the couch to check on you. A smile crossed his face as you took the pain meds he’d left out and downed the glass of water. Your eyes seemed to bulge out of your head when you noticed his presence in the room. Laughing, he greeted you, “Good morning, sunshine.”

“Please tell me you miraculously don’t remember anything I said last night because I remember, and I don’t want to.” You said, pulling your knees up to your chest.

“Sorry to disappoint then.” He sent you a sympathetic smile.

With a sigh, you patted the spot beside you on your bed. Wordlessly, Harrison got up from the couch and came to sit beside you on the bed. He expected you to say something, but when you were silent, seemingly caught up in your thoughts, he spoke up, “Did you mean it? When you said I was your first love?”

“Yes.” There was no hesitation in your reply, and you turned to finally meet his eye, “It was a very intense schoolgirl crush, hence why I hated Vivian after that mistletoe incident, but seeing you again just made me realize that it was more than just a crush. I’ve regretted saying no to you all those years ago ever since you came back into my life.”

“Well, I thought I was over my crush on you, but turns out, there are just some things time can’t change.”

A comfortable silence overfell you two again before you finally spoke up with the words that had been on your mind for weeks, “I think I’m in love with you.”

“I think I’m in love with you, too.” Harrison sealed his words by leaning in to kiss you.

With no script to follow now, he felt fireworks as you kissed him back. One of your hands drifted to the back of his neck, silently urging him to continue kissing you. His hands snaked around your waist before he shifted to lay on his back, rolling you on top of him. You deepened the kiss, your tongue finding its way into his mouth. He moaned at first, fully enjoying himself, before his lips curved into a smile, and he started to laugh against your lips.

“What’s so funny?” You asked, pulling away from his lips. His hands wandered from your hips up to where your own hands were resting on his chest, and he casually intertwined your fingers.

“It’s nothing.” He said in an attempt to play it off, but the smile on his face told you that whatever he was thinking was hilarious to him. “You remember Jack Evans? He told everyone that you were the best french kisser in school, and, well, he’s not wrong.”

You let out a scoff before giggling to yourself, “First of all, how many girls have you french kissed from drama school and should I be jealous? Second of all, Jack was an ass who couldn’t kiss for shit, but I’ll take it as a compliment that he told everyone that.” You leaned down until your lips were just barely touching, “And thirdly, do you want to keep talking about drama school, or do you want me to keep kissing you?”

“You don’t need to be jealous, but I kinda like that you are.” He replied with a cheeky smile. “And you’re right. He was an ass.”

“And for the last one?” You asked, raising your eyebrows at him.

Harrison pretended to think about it for a second before he let go of your hand to cup your cheek, bringing your lips crashing back down to his.

[haileygarciasunshine]

Widow Maker

Pairing: Loki Laufeyson x Fem!Ex-Widow!Reader

Written: I’ve actually been working on this for a few days lololololol someone help me. Writers block is a BITCH so is life lol.

Posted: July 12th, 2021

Warning: Some swears, Violence

Word Count: 1,605

Author's Note: Contains Spoilers (Ish? Idk) For Black Widow. Also, I made some cool ass spacers. Feel free to use them I just ask you tag me if you do!

Movie and TV Show Masterlist

Before Civil War.

“You do realize you aren’t the only one with a tragic past, right?” You questioned, feeling heat bubbling up inside, while you felt a flush feeling dancing along your cheeks.

Out of your peripheral vision, you were able to see Loki roll his eyes.

“If you keep rolling your eyes, they‘re going to get stuck up there.” You spat, turning around and leaning against the counter.

A chorus of ’Ooo’s’ sounded through the kitchen, followed by snickers.

Glancing up, you locked eyes with Natasha who in turn, raised a questioning eyebrow at you. Rolling your eyes, you scoffed silently to yourself. Without her verbally questioning, you knew she was asking why the sudden need to confront the Asgardian God.

Shaking your head, you pushed the fluttering feeling down that had begun bubbling up.

It was no secret that Loki was on his redemption tour. In fact, word around the office had been that all the females along with some men, had began fawning over him. Naturally, the sudden lustful gazes and sultry conversations had gone to his head.

Loki was quick to develop a sudden arrogance after he had found out the new chatter around him. Being with the Avengers since the beginning along with being a friend of Thor, you knew all the up’s and down’s that surrounded him. Keeping your opinion to yourself, you had been on his side since you could remember. However, with everyone on his bandwagon, you felt jealous bubble up inside.

“Does your head ever get tired of all the hot air that comes out of your mouth?” Loki shot back, earning a sharp elbow from Thor.

Snapping your head in his direction, you glared at him. “You know what? Fuck you.”

Frowning you furrowed your eyebrows together, before turning on the balls of your feet and storming out of the kitchen. Feeling tears welling up in yours, you rapidly made your way to your room. Just in time for the tears to begin cascading down your cheeks. Whenever Loki attacked someone, he knew their weaknesses and made sure to do the most damage. After a while, you situated yourself on your bed and letting sleep overwhelm you.

Jolting awake, your heart rapidly beated out of your chest as the sound of knocking on your door, captured your attention.

Gasping, you turned to face your door before steadily getting to your feet. Opening your door, your jaw fell slack as you stared at the person before you. Opening and closing your mouth a few times, you decided it would be better to step aside and allow them in.

Loki stood awkwardly in the middle of your room. His hands firm by his side. Shutting the door, you leaned against it as you stared at Loki with disbelief. Neither of you wanted to be the first to break the silence.

Standing before you, he glanced around your room, seemly taking in your belongings. Clearing his throat, he turned around to face you.

”I… I uh…” His voice trailed off as he began his light blueberry eyes capturing Y/E/C ones. As you gazed at each other, you were able to see an underlying emotion, that you weren’t sure he was able to express until now.

Coming to your senses, you felt your walls hold steadily as you began fearing letting them down.

”If…If you’ve come here to apologize..” Your voice trailed off. Gazing down at your hands, you began picking at your cuticle bed. One of your many habits you had. “Save it.”

Dropping his gaze to his feet, his head hung low. The air began holding silent cries that neither would feel. Lost words that would never be spoken. All emotion evaporing into nothingness.

“I think you should go.” You mumbled at Loki. Not daring to glance at him, you rushed towards the bathroom before shutting the door without another word. Putting the toilet seat down, you perched yourself on it. Placing your elbows on your knees, you lowered your head into your hands. Tears began welling up in yours at your loss of emotions.

——

After Civil War. Cue Black Widow Era, also cue spoilers.

”Nat.” You hissed as you stood before Natasha.

Responding with hum she placed the phone she had just been talking into on the ledge. Glancing around she subtly slide it off the ledge and into the water.

”Natasha!” You demanded.

”What!” She grumbled.

“Why do you insist on taunting them?”

Scoffing, she rolled her eyes. “The same reason, you and reindeer games keep dancing around your feelings for one another.” She shrugged.

”We don’t have feelings for-“

Cutting you off she let out a humorless chuckle. “Whatever helps you sleep at night.”

Letting your jaw hang open slightly, any argument you had thought of, instantly dying in your throat. Scrunching your eyebrows together you were at a loss for words.

”We…We don’t like each other.” Your attempted to argue.

”Right.” She spoke in disbelief. Turning to gaze at the mountains, you heard her mumbled something in Russian under her breath.

”What-“

”If that’s true,” Natasha turned her attention back towards you. “Then why is he here?”

Reflecting on her question, you were able to respond when you sensed a presence approaching you from behind. Turning on your heels, you faced the perpetrator.

”Hello, love.” Loki greeted, his eyes sparkling as he spoke. A grin making it’s way to his lips.

A fluttering feeling bubbled inside your stomach. Your palms rapidly growing damp. Without much thought, you propelled yourself into his arms. Your arms wrapping around his shoulders gently yanking him into you. It wasn’t long before you felt a rumble in his chest from his chuckling. Loki wrapped his arms around your waist, holding you closer than normal. He nuzzled his face into the crook of your neck, catching the scent of your shampoo that he longed to smell again.

”It’s been too long.”

Moving to pull away, Loki tightened his arms preventing from the slight distance between you. “That it has.” You responded with a nod.

After the events of that night in your room, Loki had gone above and beyond to prove he was worthy of your forgiveness. After awhile his attempts at forgiveness, lead to a blossom in friendship.

”How is space?” You questioned after he reluctantly allowed you to pull away.

”Space…Space is good.” He spoke nodding his head.

Grinning at him, you couldn’t stop thinking that it was all a dream. One that was sweet, the kind that you don’t want to wake up from because it seems too good to be true, especially because it usually is.

“What are you doing here?” You regretted asking as soon as you spoke.

”I…” His voice trailed off as he seemed to reflect on the question.

Cutting him off, Natasha made her way beside you both. “We have to go.” She spoke, her voice holding back a slight panic that you could see bubbling up behind her strong demeanor.

Snapping your head in Loki’s direction you were about to saying your goodbye, when she cut you off.

”All of us.”

Nodding your head, you ahout to question her when she cut you off once again.

”No time. Come on!”

——

After finding Yelena, the four of you set off on a venture to search for their so called, mother and father. Both girls held twenty years worth of anger and bitterness, especially aimed at each other.

Yelena was the helicopter pilot for the mission, while Natasha was the muscle and brains. More often than not settling in the shot gun rider seat. Thus, leaving you and Loki alone in the back.

Sitting side by side, you were jostled together before you were thrown against his side.

Sending you a grin, he silently let you know he didn’t much mind the non existent proximity between you. Neither of you spoke much on the flight, however you often witnessed the cringeworthy interaction between Alexei and both girls.

——

After arriving at Melina’s little farm, you had begun to feel awkward. There was a sense of family as well as anger. Rightfully so, both girls had been subjected to torture and used as weapons forgoing most of their lives.

Standing idly in the kitchen, Natasha appeared beside you. Jumping at her sudden presence you placed a hand over your heart.

”Geez, Nat! Don’t do that!“ You cautioned. “You scared me!”

Natasha giggled at your reaction. After the moment quickly died down, she mirrored your stance of leaning against the counters.

Nudging your shoulder with hers, she had a smirk plastered upon the seams of her lips.

”Do you believe me now?”

Tilting your head, you gazed at her with question. “About?”

Rolling her eyes, she let out a groan. “About Loki sharing the feelings you have for him.”

Scoffing you shook your head. “I don’t really need a monologue on that.”

“Seems to me that you do.”

Standing together, you allowed a blanket of silence to overwhelm you.

”You should give him a chance.” She muttered quietly.

If it hadn’t been eerily quiet in the kitchen, you wouldn’t have heard her.

“I…What?” You gasped.

“Don’t make me say it.” She moaned.

“Say what?”

Letting out a defeated sigh, she shook her head. “I think he’s a good guy.”

”What do you-“

Before you had the chance to question her, Loki rushed into the kitchen. His eyes filled with bewilderment. He came off frazzled.

”Are you okay?” You questioned suddenly forgetting about the question you had partially spoke to Natasha.

”They’re here-“

Luminescent lights from outside suddenly shone inside. Turning to face the lights, you and Natasha held a startling gaze.

Something you hadn’t felt since reclaiming your freedom from the Widow program washed over you. Judging by Natasha‘s features that seemed to be mirroring yours, you knew she had the same feeling.

Fear.

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[jokertrap-ran]

(光与夜之恋 Light and Night) Osborn’s 5✩ Inspiration: Black VS Black [黑色对峙] Date Translation (END 6: Heart-throb)

“Do you really think that I think there’s no helping you?”

*Light and Night Master-list | Osborn’s Personal Masterlist *Spoiler free: Translations will remain under cut *Join the Light & Night Discord (＾▽＾)~ ♪ *This 5✩ Inspiration has 6 Endings!! *Osborn’s tag will be #For Night, For Freedom *Requested by anon! You can check my on-going requests and more here!

✥ Choice: Heart-throb [心动] ★Night★

The cat caused an incident! What should I do?

⊹ Check the fallen model ⊹

I didn’t think too much about it, instead, hurrying over to where the car model had fallen. 

I picked it up and inspected the damages.

There was a long crack in the middle and several parts had broken off, scattering compartments all over the floor.

MC: Can this… still be saved…?

Just as I was thinking of how to break this bad news to Osborn, his low voice sounded from behind.

Osborn: What a big commotion.

Osborn: What? Did Mitt get into an accident?

I steeled myself and stopped covering the scene of the “car accident” that had occurred. I got up and handed him the car model that I held.

MC: The “culprit” knocked this car model down and fled.

Osborn frowned, reaching me in a couple of long strides.

He took the model and turned it around a couple of times, observing it with an indifferent look on his face.

MC: Is it too damaged to fix?

Osborn: I can just send it for repairs over the next few days. Let's go look for the cat first.

He calmly placed the broken car model back onto the shelf, taking a “let’s talk about this later” stance.

This model had been placed together with many other car models that looked new, pristine, and without a scratch. Not to mention, the glistening trophy that had been right next to it. A wild guess entered my mind.

MC: Do all the car models here hold some sort of commemorative meaning?

Osborn: Hm? Why do you ask?

MC: I mean, if they are some sort of special memento to you, then they should have been subjected to routine maintenance, right?

MC: If so, then you should also have the tools for it along with any part replacements, yes?

Thoughtfulness slipped into his eyes.

Osborn: You want to help me fix it?

MC: Yeah! That cat was just spooked real bad, and it wouldn’t do us any good if it got a bigger fright the next time and reacted even worse to it if we continued chasing after it.

MC: So, why don’t we leave the cat hunt for later and fix the car model back up first?

MC: Plus, I’m pretty dexterous with my hands. Wanna give me a chance to show you my prowess?

He raised an eyebrow, his pale green eyes glinting.

Osborn: Okay. Here's your time to shine.

Osborn stretched his arms over my head. For a while, all I could see was his broad chest. I felt my breath hitch.

Then, he suddenly lowered his head. His face was incredibly close to mine.

The scent of black cedar assaulted my nose. I blinked. My brain was lagging.

MC: Oh, okay.

Osborn: Take it.

My gaze slid to his hand. Turns out that he’d just been fetching the toolbox that had been in the cabinet above the display shelves.

Osborn: I'm waiting.

I took the toolbox from him and opened it.

I was greeted by a multitude of components in all shapes and sizes. Some of the tools in it were similar to the ones I used when making my designs, but there were also some that I’d never seen before.

I picked up a tool that looked like a cross between a pen and a knife, looking to Osborn for advice.

MC: What's this?

Osborn: An exacto knife. It’s used to cut off excess parts of the joints when required.

MC: Mmhm, okay. I've remembered it.

Osborn: This is a cutting plier, screw sanders, tweezers...

Osborn picked out a couple more tools from within the box and introduced them to me.

Osborn: Anything else you can't recognize?

MC: Not for now.

Osborn: Okay. Then let's remove the damaged compartments first.

MC: Okay.

First, we used a screwdriver to remove the damaged compartments. Then, we replaced them with brand-new spare parts.

This race car model was really different from those being sold out in the market. It was made with exquisite craftsmanship, and its internal makings were far more complicated than I'd initially thought.

When it was time to add colours to it, Osborn prepared the required paints and set them out in measured portions onto the palette with ease and finesse. He smoothly handed me a brush.

Osborn: Do you know how to touch up the paintwork?

I hesitated.

MC: I've painted outfit designs before for design needs, but I'm sure it's completely different from actually painting a model.

MC: I don't know if it works the same…

Osborn: See my demonstration first then.

He dipped his brush into the red paint, carefully painting it onto the model. It came out very uniform and smoothly layered.

I'd stared at him, watching him do it a couple more times. But, no matter how much I watched the same process, I couldn't quite grasp it. Even if I tried mimicking his actions, my paintwork always turned out patchy and uneven.

Osborn laughed, placing his hand over mine and directing the brush I held.

He directed my brush, guiding me on how I should be painting the compartment with a focused look on his face.

It was all serious and business, except… My focus was inevitably drawn towards his movements and breaths.

Osborn: Get it?

MC: Mmhm...

I tried my hardest to remember the way he did it and followed suit. The end result was much smoother than what I'd been accomplishing before.

After the finishing touches were in place, I raised the model and showed it to him.

MC: Like… this? This should be done now, right?

Osborn: Not bad. You've got standard.

My spirits soared at having received such direct praise from him.

MC: Since I'm such an apt learner, how about enlisting my help again the next time you make another model of a race car?

Osborn slightly raised a brow as he contemplated my paint-stained hands.

Osborn: I'll think about it.

MC: Does this even need to be considered?

MC: I'm pretty quick to pick up hands-on skills, not just fixing up models of racing cars! So I'm a fast learner no matter what it is!

MC: You can test me again if you don't believe me!

Just as I was boasting about my assets in an attempt to make myself appeal to him, Osborn's calloused fingers suddenly brushed against my cheek.

The rough texture of the pads of his fingers made my heart skip a beat.

MC: What's wrong?

Osborn: You got something on your face.

I doubtfully touched my face. Suddenly, I pulled my hand away to find my fingers stained with red paint.

Astonished, I look at Osborn's hands, only to find even more red paint on them…

MC: Don't tell me you drew something on it!!

Osborn: What gives?

MC: Hey! You're biting the hand that feeds!

Osborn: Whatever do you mean by that?

Osborn: I'm just adding some blush and colour to your face. Makes you prettier.

I was taken aback, nonetheless.

MC: Okay. Then, I'll add some colour to your cheeks for you!

Osborn: Whoa, hey! Easy!

MC: Nothing you say now is gonna stop me!

I swiftly picked up the brush and dipped it into the paint set out onto the palette, rushing straight for his face.

Osborn quickly reared back, but I subconsciously followed right after his retreat.

And this was how I toppled him down to the ground with him doing nothing to defend himself.

Osborn was astonished. He'd attempted to get back up, only for my other hand to immediately dart out to pin him down by the shoulder.

MC: No moving!

Surprise flashed through his eyes, as his usual impish smile crawled its way back up his face.

Osborn: Wow, what an aggressor.

MC: That's right. Now's my time to retaliate!

MC: No use trying to escape!

I circled the air with the brush, purposefully observing his face to make my mark.

MC: Hmm, what do you want me to draw on you?

Osborn seemingly accepted the fact that he was going to be an inevitable victim of mine since I already had him "pinned" down. He folded his arms behind his head, giving my question some serious thought.

Osborn: An air drawing?

MC: Dream on!

Osborn: Mercy, please. I beg you.

MC: It's too late to be begging me for mercy.

MC: Hmph. Just watch me improvise on the spot~

Just as I was rummaging through my brain for a glimmer of inspiration, a light bulb suddenly lit in my head. 

I had an image now: Mitt as it was fleeing.

❖☆———————————★❖

I leaned down, supporting myself on Osborn's shoulder. 

Following the curve of his jaw, I applied colour to his skin, drawing a colourful cat.

Osborn had his guard down, seemingly content to watch me work my "artistic talents" with him as the canvas.

The surroundings lapsed into silence.

I was drawing it on with such rapt concentration, yet I was still able to notice his long black lashes and hear his familiar steady breathing ever so clearly. I could somewhat feel the slight rise and fall of his chest.

I vaguely registered our close proximity to each other. My heart seemed unable to settle with the fact that we were so close to each other that our breaths intermingled, clamouring loudly within my chest.

I blinked twice, finishing off the last stroke before getting up and putting some distance between us.

❖☆———————————★❖

Osborn: Done?

I nodded.

Osborn: What do you think of your work of art?

Huh? Is he asking me to rate my own work?

I quickly gave him a once over, only to realize that I'd been distracted at the end, so it'd turned out a little funky. I nearly laughed at it right then and there.

MC: Ahem. I think it's not bad! You've got a big kitty on you now!

He waggled his brows, lazily raising his body halfway back up. His features were suddenly enlarged before my eyes once more as he leaned closer.

Osborn: Happy now?

MC: Mmhm… Pretty happy.

Osborn: Then let me tell you something that'll make you even happier.

He moved even closer, his words gently flowing with the air, wrapping themselves around my ears.

I shuddered as a scalding heat started creeping up my neck.

MC: ...What is it?

Osborn: The other kitty's right behind you.

Mitt: Meow~ Meow~

The last of his words were drowned out by the sudden meowing that sounded.

I snapped out of the trance of the moment, much to my embarrassment. Mitt had actually slinked behind me somehow without my knowing!

MC: Right, we should hurry and catch it before it gets up to no good again!

I quickly climbed off Osborn, flushing red as I fled.

A light chuckle sounded behind me in response.

❖☆———————————★❖

By the time we found Mitt, it was already sprawled out beside the TV cabinet with its paws stuck underneath, fiddling with something in the gap.

Recalling the layout of his living room, I quietly tip-toed and whispered my idea into Osborn’s ear.

MC: I’ll take left, you take right. We’ll pincer it.

Osborn: It’s already here, so there’s no need to go through so much trouble.

MC: Huh?

Osborn: Just wait and see.

Osborn took a couple of long strides forwards in the direction of the cat.

I followed after him, quietly approaching the black cat. However, my attention was suddenly caught by the photo frame that the cat had just been playing with.

Picking up the frame, I carefully observed it…

In the picture were Osborn and a couple of familiar-looking teammates. They’d all had an arm around each other’s shoulder, beaming as they held the same trophy.

Their faces all look much younger… Is this a photo from years ago?

The race car in the background had a red and white body with an orange rear spoiler, similar to the car model that Mitt had batted off its perch earlier.

MC: Don’t tell me… Was that car model made based on this race car?

I was lost in thought when a sudden meow broke my train of thought.

Osborn: Still wanna run?

❖☆———————————★❖

I raised my head to see Osborn with both arms raised, gently holding up the cat in question.

The bright and warm sunlight shone in through the window, carefully outlining his chiselled side-profile and the contours of his muscles.

Although Mitt had already been caught, it still glared daggers at Osborn. It was as if a cat and a human were engaged in a silent battle with each other.

After a while, Mitt seemed to register the fact that it’d lost, meowing pitifully in that soft cry once more.

❖☆———————————★❖

Osborn: Oh? You know how to beg for mercy now, don’t you?

Osborn carried Mitt to the little corner we’d set up for it. Mitt seemingly gave up on the game of chase, lowering its head to eat the cat food that we’d prepared for it since the very beginning.

Watching it eat its food so obediently, I couldn’t help but kneel down and stroke its round head.

Mitt cast a doubtful glance at me, but turned its head, indulging nuzzling itself into my palm.

MC: !

MC: I touched it! How cute…

Osborn: You’re that excited from just being able to touch it?

MC: Yeah. It looked so naughty that I thought I wouldn’t be able to touch it today.

Osborn: It’ll come running up to you for a lick or two so long as you have food.

MC: Then I MUST let it try the wet cat food! Maybe it’ll get closer to me!

I sped towards the sofa and picked up the packet of wet cat food, purposely waving it before its nose.

It couldn’t resist the offered temptation after all. Its soft fluffy paws batted at my wrist as it opened its mouth and cried its pleas.

MC: Okay, okay. Any more and you’ll end up a piggy.

I recalled something after putting away the remaining food. I picked up the photo frame that I’d set down earlier and handed it to Osborn.

MC: Oh, yeah. By the way, this was the photo frame that Mitt was batting with under the TV cabinet earlier. I don’t know where you normally display it.

He took the photo frame from me and glanced at it.

MC: And on that note, I realized that the car in the background looks very similar to the model we just pieced back together. Are they the same?

Osborn: Oh. The model was made according to this race car.

Suddenly, I recalled having seen the highlights of all his races before.

The year and month in which he’d won his first racing championship seemingly coincided with the time that this photo was taken.

My guess had tumbled out of my lips before I could stop it.

MC: Is this the car you drove when you won your first championship?

He quirked a brow.

Osborn: Why, you know me so well.

MC: Then… Is that car model something of a memento from that race?

Osborn: You can say that.

MC: I heard somewhere before that that car’s engine had to be changed out every two races. It shouldn’t be in use anymore, right?

Osborn: The engine exploded on me during that race, so it was only my companion once.

Osborn spoke lightly of it, but thinking of how exciting and terrifying it must have been back then, I couldn’t help but feel my heart sink a little.

MC: I’m glad the car model’s alright. Otherwise, it’d be such a pity for such a meaningful memento to get damaged like that.

Osborn: So I should thank you properly. Is that it?

MC: Huh? Thank me?

He chuckled lightly, his eyes sliding from the photo to my face. He had a slightly flippant look on his face.

Osborn: Weren’t you the one who made that car model more meaningful?

MC: ……

I was taken aback for a bit. I looked at him in surprise, only to find his gaze calm and gentle. There was a smile glimmering within his eyes.

Osborn: You were pretty clever when fixing the model. Why so stupefied now?

As his words sank in, I felt my heart flutter as I realized what he’d meant by having made it more “meaningful”. Something seemed to have filled my heart. It was a little flustering, yet also a little sweet.

I worried my lip and gathered my courage together before looking up to meet his eyes.

MC: Then, that makes me happier now…

MC: Although I didn’t get the chance to sit in on the race of your first championship and cheer you on…

MC: I was still able to piece the model back together and play a part in that precious moment of memory.

Inexplicable emotions surfaced in Osborn’s eyes, and in the next second, his big hand ruffled my hair with a vengeance.

Osborn: There’s really no helping you, is there?

I shyly ducked my head, but I couldn’t stop the corners of my mouth from rising.

At this moment, the sun had enveloped us both within its warmth.

The cat quietly ate by our feet, letting out a purr of satisfaction every once in a while.

Slowly but surely, unspeakable feelings started to bloom and spread within the confines of my heart.

I hope, from the deepest points of my heart, that time would always be eternally frozen in this beautiful moment.

⊹ ˚✩ ━━━━━━━━━━━ ∘◦ ✥ ◦∘ ━━━━━━━━━━━ ✩˚ ⊹

✥ Choose your Ending:

END 1 | Choice: Do Nothing [都不做]

END 2 +3 + 4 | Choice: Call Out [呼唤] ⊹Speak⊹

END 5 | Choice: Listen [倾听] ❖ASMR

END 6 | Choice: Heart-throb [心动] ★Night★

❖☆————— ⊹ For Night, For Freedom⊹ —————★❖

Previous Part: (Prologue)

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 301: All My Todorokis

Previously on BnHA: We learned that when a bunch of superpowered villains are suddenly set loose with nobody around to stop them, things get fucked pretty quickly. Old Man Samurai and a bunch of other useless people decided to make “I pretend I do not see it” their new mantra, and resigned. Endeavor had a moment of despair on account of being crushed by the guilt of having ruined the lives of himself, his family, and basically everyone else in the entire world. For various reasons the heretical notion of “person who has done bad things feels sorry for doing them” sent fandom spiraling into a meltdown, so that was fun. The chapter ended with the entire Todoroki clan descending upon Enji’s hospital room to have a dramatic chat about Touya and All That General Fuckery.

Today on BnHA: Horikoshi is all “here’s the story of how Baby Touya slowly went insane trying to win his father’s love.” It’s a tale full of subverted expectations and heartbreaking inevitability, and also like twenty panels of the cutest fucking kids who ever existed on planet earth, who are so fucking cute that I can’t stop thinking about their cuteness even with all of the horrifying family tragedy unfolding around them. It is absolutely ridiculous how cute they are. Touya is out here pushing his tiny body past its limits because he inherited the same obsession as his dad and neither of them can put it aside even though it’s destroying them, and yet all I can think about is Baby Shouto’s (。･o･｡) face. Anyways what a chapter.

so I have to confess that even though I managed to avoid being caught off-guard by the early leaks, the number of people reblogging my Endeavor posts from earlier this week and using the tag “bnha 301” kind of gave me an inkling that this chapter will include more Tododrama lol. that said, I don’t know anything else about it, so we’re still good spoiler-wise

AHHHHH FLAHSBAKC AHHHH. omg I know I typoed the shit out of that, but I’m just going to leave it lol I think it’s fitting

holy shit holy fuck. so this is Rei and Enji’s first meeting, then??

yepppp, oh shit

so wait, I know this is not even the slightest bit important, but are they meeting at Enji’s home or Rei’s? because I always figured that Enji was the one with the super-Japanese aesthetic, but maybe that was Rei’s side of the family all along

(ETA: from what I found during my very brief google search, omiai meetings are often held at fancy hotels or restaurants, so maybe that’s what this is.)

there’s such a period drama feel to this setting. like it’s so outrageously formal fff how can anyone stand this kind of atmosphere though seriously

OH THANK GOD

I mean they’re still stiff af but at least they’re not rigidly sitting in seiza and staring at each other unblinkingly anymore lol. Enji’s actually got his hands in his pockets now. why is this somehow almost cute

oh damn it’s the flowers

Rei seems so subdued and it’s so hard to get any idea of what she’s actually thinking. I want to see her side of this dammit

but anyway, so at least from Enji’s perspective it seems like even though the marriage was arranged and he picked her because of her quirk, he still loved his wife and wanted to do right by her. the fact that he was watching her and noticed that she liked the flowers, and remembered that detail for all these years -- there’s a reason why Horikoshi’s showing us this. we know what’s going to happen later on; we know how much fear and violence and breaking of trust is coming up ahead, and while it may seem like this scene is serving to soften Enji’s character further -- which to be fair it is -- it also helps drive home the full impact of his abuse. that it’s so terrible not only because of the trauma of the abuse itself, but also because of the way it retroactively destroys all of the good things as well. this could have potentially been such a sweet scene, but it’s inescapably tainted by the knowledge of what’s to come, at least for me. and that’s just brutal

anyways, shit. is the whole chapter going to be like this?? feel free to toss in something I can actually make a joke about sometime, Horikoshi

oop, back to the present

omfg lol

“are you all right” “NO I’M NOT ALL RIGHT WHAT THE FUCK.” “oh, right, because of all the stuff that’s happened with me abusing you and you having a mental breakdown and being hospitalized for ten years and then our son coming back to life and killing thirty people, right, right. I almost forgot.” whoops

omfg you guys I’m loving this new and improved steely-eyed Rei. I’m loving her a lot

and what do you mean “part one” fkjds how long is this going to be. TOO MUCH DRAMA FOR ONE CHAPTER TO HANDLE

oh, hello

yeah I’ll say you did. didn’t seem to bother you much at the time, though

HMMMMMMMMMMMM

Dabi Is A Noumu intensifies even further. anyways though would you fucking look at this boy lounging on this moth-eaten couch doing his best DRAW ME LIKE YOUR FRENCH GIRLS impression wtf

Dabi what if you actually had killed him??? what would you feel?? satisfaction?? regret?? anything at all?? tell me your secrets goddammit

who are you talking to buddy

Fuyumi-chan, Natsu-kun (is it common for brothers to address each other as -kun?? can’t recall seeing that in many other anime, but hey), and “dot dot dot,,,,,, SHOUTO” lol thank you so much for this bountiful heaping of Tododrama Horikoshi we are blessed

AH, WHAT DID I SAY THE OTHER DAY

ULTIMATE MELODRAMATIC THEATER CHILD. “I’M JUST GOING TO LIE ON THIS COUCH SHIRTLESS AND ALONE AND MAKE SPEECHES TO MY FAMILY MEMBERS WHO AREN’T THERE AND SAY THINGS LIKE ‘WATCH ME IN THE PITS OF HELL’ WITH A STRAIGHT FACE BECAUSE NO ONE’S THERE TO JUDGE ME.” WELL JOKE’S ON YOU MISTER CHATTERBOX BECAUSE I AM IN FACT JUDGING THE SHIT OUT OF YOU LOL

(ETA: and on a more serious note, it’s interesting to see that “look at me”/”watch me” theme being used again though, because we see that same sentiment uttered repeatedly by the younger Touya in the flashback. well kid, you definitely got your wish at last. don’t know what else to say.)

OKAY HORIKOSHI HAS DECIDED THAT’S ENOUGH FUN, TIME FOR MORE FLASHBACKS

oh my sweet precious lord

just as cute as we left him. giving us a child this cute when we all know full well what’s going to happen to him is just unspeakably cruel though

HOMG

I’m fucking speechless. you broke me, congratulations. what am I even supposed to do with this

I can’t get over this. moving forward my life will be split into two distinct parts, B.P. (Before the Pout) and A.P. (After the Pout)

and meanwhile there’s ALL THIS BACKGROUND ANGST BUILDING UP, AND I CAN’T EVEN FOCUS ON IT. Touya’s arm and cheek are covered in bandages (I’m guessing this is shortly after that “ouch!” panel we got some chapters back), and Enji is deliberately avoiding training with him because he doesn’t want him to hurt himself further. I can’t fucking get over the irony that all this time everyone thought Touya had died because Enji pushed him too far in his training, and it turns out that it’s the opposite -- the tragedy ultimately happened because he didn’t want to push him. but I’m jumping ahead of myself though I guess

by the way,

remember this?? just wanted to remind you that it exists just in case you forgot

so now someone is talking and basically saying that Touya is the exact opposite of what Enji was hoping for when he decided to start playing with quirk genetics

-- okay hold up

...lol no, never mind. for a second I thought “holy shit he looks kind of familiar WHAT IF IT’S UJIKO OMG” before I remembered that Enji would have recognized him during the hospital capture mission if that was the case. so NEVER MIND, PROCEED

IMAGINE THAT, ENJI DOESN’T QUITE SEEM SATISFIED WITH THIS SUGGESTION OF QUITTING NOW

(ETA: how the fuck did this man go around saving 62 towns in a single day what even is All Might.)

[clicks tongue several times] trouble a’brewin’

MEANWHILE BABY TOUYA HAS UNFORTUNATELY INHERITED HIS DAD’S STUBBORN STREAK

KLDIHWOEIJFL:KSDJ

!!!!!!!!!!!

oh my god. oh my god. what is this chapter. WHAT IS IT

so now Touya is all “YOU JUST DON’T UNDERSTAND MY MANLY DESIRE TO BURN MYSELF ALIVE” well you got her there champ

THEY’RE TOO CUTE. OH MY GOD. HIS FURIOUS LITTLE TEARS. HER CHUBBY LIL FACE. HIS STUBBY LIL FISTS. SOMEONE HELP ME

also are they just home alone lol or what. “hey Touya, you’re what, like six now?? do us a favor and look after your baby sister for a couple hours for us would you? make sure not to set yourself on fire or anything.” WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG!!

now it’s nighttime and Enji and Rei are arguing, presumably about his decision not to train Touya anymore

whew. okay. so, a couple of things here

1. first of all I think this conclusively shows that Enji really was trying to do the best he could for Touya. he stopped training him as soon as he realized it was hurting him, but Touya was still determined so he tried to make it work anyway, and even visited doctors to try and figure out if there was anything they could do. then, once they were absolutely sure that it wasn’t going to work, he tried multiple times to explain to Touya why they had to stop. he didn’t just abandon him out of the blue, which is really important to note. “no matter how much I tried telling him...”

so yeah, that debunks another common fandom accusation. so by the time he finally makes this decision, which we all know is going to turn out horribly, it’s basically because he’s already tried everything else he could think of. which, by the way, still doesn’t mean he handled this right. but at the very least he was taking Touya’s feelings into account and he was trying, and he didn’t just abruptly toss his son aside (at least not yet)

2. buuuut, then there’s this panel right below all that

which is the other side of it. if he’d just quit like the doctor person advised him to, that would have been the end of it. Touya would still have been upset, but he would have eventually gotten over it and the family would have moved on and possibly even been happy. but what happens next happens because Enji can’t let go. he still has this maddening urge to surpass All Might, and so he and Rei keep having more children, and then Shouto is born, and Enji finally has a kid he can start projecting all of his hysterical ambitions onto once again, and everything starts spiraling out of control soon after

though p.s. none of that is Shouto’s fault though!! he’s one of the few good things to come out of this whole mess and I’m very happy that he exists. the tragedy is that his dad fucking lost his mind over his quirk and fucked everything up. but that’s on him, not Touya or Shouto

anyways, SLKFJLSHGLKJL

I CAN’T FUCKING TAKE THIS YOU GUYS??? LOOK AT THAT LIL BUTTON OF A NOSE??? I’M LOSING IT HERE???

AND TOUYA JUST SEEMS DEVASTATED OMG

because children aren’t stupid, after all. he understands that his dad is still looking to surpass All Might. and so he feels like a failure, and feels like his dad is trying to replace him because he wasn’t good enough. and even now, isn’t that what the adult Touya is trying to prove?? that he was good enough after all?? “I’ll show you what happens when you give up on me, dad”?? “I’ll show you what I can do”?? fuck my life fuck everything

AND YOU CAN SEE THE TOLL THAT IT’S ALL TAKING ON REI GETTING WORSE AND WORSE AS WELL OH GOD

really nice touch here with the panel outlines becoming all shimmery from the heat of Endeavor’s flames (and/or becoming more unstable as the family gets closer and closer to their breaking point). but man, Horikoshi I can’t handle this, please show us more cute kids or something I can’t

GKELKWFJLDKSHFLKL

WITTLE BABE. BEEB. BUBS. SMOL. lkj; oh ouch a piece of my heart just detached and latched onto him huh look at that

TODOROKI “I’M SO SMALL AND I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT’S GOING ON AND I DIDN’T ASK TO BE HERE” SHOUTO AHHHHH

crazy how they all just seem to know right off the bat lol. kid doesn’t even have object permanence yet, let alone a quirk. but do they care?? IT’S THE HAIR, RIGHT. WE’RE ALL THINKING IT, I’M JUST GONNA COME OUT AND SAY IT. they knew the minute they looked at him lol

AND MEANWHILE TOUYA IS OFF HAVING UNSUPERVISED TRAINING/CRYING SESSIONS IN THE MOUNTAINS OR WHATEVER, AND, UH OH

are those blue flames yet?? they seem pretty close

(ETA: this is one of the few cases where the manga being in black and white is infuriating lol.)

OH MY GOD AND STILL

so it’s not like he was so disinterested that he didn’t notice what was happening, and he was still trying to stop it and get through to him. trying to reassure him that it wasn’t the end of the world and there were other things he could do with his life, but this one particular thing just wasn’t going to happen

fucking hell. it’s agonizing seeing how close they actually were to fixing it. if he’d only said the right words, or if he’d realized at this point how destructive his obsession could be to his kids, and backed off from putting that same pressure on Shouto. we came so close to possibly having a happy ending

AND ALSO THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH ANYTHING BUT PLEASE LOOK AT HOW TOUYA IS LIKE THREE AND A HALF FEET TALL AND HIS DAD IS LIKE NINE AND A HALF FEET. Touya barely comes past his knees flkjlkg. the Todoroki household must have been so filled with like plastic stepstools to reach the bathroom sink and all the little baby toothbrushes, and baby gates to keep the kiddos out of the important grown-up rooms and stuff. and also days-old half-empty cups of water and stale crackers and hot wheels and my little ponies strewn everywhere

“BUT EVERYONE AT SCHOOL SAYS THEY’RE GONNA BE HEROES” a wild Deku parallel appears?? how bout that

I know this is like a pivotal moment in the Todo Tragedy and all, but fucking look at this lil dumpling

“sup bro, it’s me, the manifestation of your fears of inadequacy and lack of fatherly affections. a GAAA. ba-baAA-baa [gurgling baby sounds]”

OHHHHH IT’S THE SOUND OF MY HEART BREAKING OH NO

HE WANTS TO BE LIKE YOU ENJI. good lord somebody please just get this family some therapy

“DAD YOU IGNITED IT IN ME” flkjslkj nope, nope. not ready for this pain here

baby Shouto, would you like to weigh in on this affair? “DA!! ba-ga-daaa, [pacifier chewing noises]” oh my, you don’t say. so insightful for one so young

OH MY GODDDDDD

IT’S SO DRAMATIC BUT ALL I CAN THINK ABOUT ARE THE SHOUNEN WOOSH LINES SURROUNDING FOUR-MONTH-OLD SHOUTO LOL HE WAS LIKE THIS FROM BIRTH OH MY GOD I AM DYING HELP

SHOUTO YOU’RE RUINING THIS ENTIRE CHAPTER!?!?!

“yo, the fuck kind of family was I fucking born into” oh, son. if you only knew. IF YOU ONLY KNEW!!

(ETA: lmao I got so distracted by the ridiculous cuteness that I glossed over the fact that Baby Touya seems to possibly be aiming at him?? it’s hard to tell because he’s also super out of it from heatstroke and may just be losing control in his attempt to show off his upgrade.)

ANYWAY THAT’S THE END EXCEPT WHAT’S THIS LAST LINE OMG

ffffff. and we’re in for ANOTHER chapter of this next week?? MORE drama?? MORE BABIES?? MORE OF EIGHT-YEAR-OLD TOUYA’S SLOW DESCENT INTO MADNESS. MY HEART CAN’T TAKE IT, BUT ALSO YES PLEASE SIGN ME UP

[sylvia-forest]

[CN] Love Around The City - Interview with Shaw

⚡Warning: This posts contain detailed spoiler's for content not yet released in EN!⚡

⚡This interview was taken before the Prologue!⚡

Adam: Shaw, where did you get this record! Even I, a hardcore fan, don’t have it!

Shaw: Don't be happy so quickly. It might not necessarily be yours.

Shaw: Have you thought about how you’re going to give her the clues?

Shaw: If you aren’t free, I'll go to Randal and the others. They should also be pretty interested in this record.

Adam: Don't, don't, don't! I’ll do it, I’ll do it!

Adam: Aside from agreeing to do it, I’ll cover her drinking expenses when she watches a performance next time.

Shaw: That won't be necessary.

Shaw: With me by her side, you won't have a chance to treat her.

Shaw: And no matter whether I'm there or not, don't let her drink alcohol.

Shaw: She has a low threshold.

Adam: Tsk tsk tsk, you’re pretty defensive…

Adam: I wonder when your older brothers in the band will get the same treatment?

Shaw: After thinking about it, should I give this record to Jensen?

Adam: Hey, I was just kidding!!

Adam: But I realized that the way you designed your clues is pretty creative and actually a little… romantic.

Adam: Shaw, it's a pity if you don’t write a few love songs.

Shaw: Not interested.

Shaw: I only write music for self-entertainment, not for others to listen.

Shaw: …I’ve only let one person listen to it.

Adam: Hehe, is there a problem?

Shaw: Hey hey hey, put away your gossip-hungry gaze. After that, put down the camera, turn around and leave this room. I have something else to do.

Adam: So are we in agreement on how the clues are to be given? That record will belong to me.

Adam: I’ll have to give her a proper thanks on that day. I’ve gotten such a huge benefit from tagging along.

Shaw: When that day comes, you aren’t allowed to say a word to her.

Shaw: That will prevent you from ruining the sense of surprise that I’ve created.

Adam: Oh? You’re pretty good at this.

Adam: …...Okay, don't look at me like that. I know that you’re going to record a message for her to watch next year, so I’ll leave first.

Adam: Shaw, all the best. We brothers will always be your strong backing!

Shaw: …….

[nomazee]

always (coming back to) you

pairing: hinata shoyo x gn reader  genre: best-friends-to-lovers/coming of age (?) warnings: mild angst, slight spoilers for the manga timeskip word count: 1.4k

hinata shoyo loves a lot, but it’s always been you.

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(note: this was sitting in my google docs for a while now. it’s something i looked back on every once in a while and smiled because i think this is one of the works i’m most proud of. i love shoyo as a character so much and i love writing about him and twisting him as i see fit to write narratives upon narratives about him. i hope everyone who reads this enjoys :)  thank you to @bearykei for beta-reading this! it was interesting to have someone with such a drastically different writing style beta-read my work and i really enjoyed seeing all your edits :0 thank you so much mwah)

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Hinata Shoyo loves you. 

He found this newfound feeling to be odd, at first. It made his chest ache a little bit, but it was a good kind of ache—the kind of ache that comes after spiking a volleyball really good. The kind of ache that rushes through his body after a grueling night of practice. The kind of ache that reminds him of all the hard work he’s put into the things he loves. 

Shoyo loves, he loves so hard, and it’s something he can’t help. It’s a trait that’s been wired into his brain since he was born—flooding through squishy, tiny baby fingers and a mind not yet exposed to all the world has to offer. 

Shoyo loves his mom, loves his sister, loves volleyball, and loves you. He’d never be able to rank these things—if he ever called anything his “favorite” he’d be too guilty to function. But he knows, definitely, absolutely, certainly, that he loves these things—and he loves them very much. 

Hinata Shoyo loves you. 

He first experiences this in his last year of junior high, sitting in the grass (it’s damp from last night’s rain, but he ignores your complaints about it), half-melted popsicle in hand as he talks to you about volleyball—because that’s all his world is at this point in his life. Barely passing school, and volleyball (the former is only there to keep the latter going.) 

“And I want to get better,” he tells you. You’ve heard this so many times before, and he knows you have, but not once have you ever complained about it. “I’m short, but I’m good. I know I am.” 

“I know you are, too,” you tell him. He spares a glance at you, and your eyes are shining, your attention all on him, sticky fruit-popsicle melting down the side of your hand. You don’t seem to mind it, though (ironically enough, with you complaining about the wet grass just before.) 

Something stirs in his lungs, circulates like spinning tumbleweeds (like the ones he sees in those weird American cartoons that he watches with you,) and it makes him ache, but it feels good. You’ve complimented him tons of times before. He’s not sure what makes this so different, what makes this sudden pain kick up in his system. Shoyo looks at you, really looks, and he doesn’t think anything is different, actually. Everything is the same. 

He brushes it off, and even when the pain comes back every time he sees you, he pointedly ignores it. 

Hinata Shoyo loves you. 

He realizes this in his last year of high school. You’re sitting on the same patch of grass you’ve always sat in, though it’s no longer damp, nor are there any popsicles to be found. It’s quiet, it has been for a minute, and when Shoyo looks at you, there are shattered silver stars gleaming in your eyes. 

You’re hurting. And he knows it’s because of him, because he told you he wants to leave the country, because he told you he wants to leave you (whether that be an intentional desire or not), because this marks the end of innocent adolescence, and the beginning of dreary adulthood and sole self-reliance. 

Shoyo’s lips part. He’s clumsy with words of consolation. He’s only known how to brush things off with playful distractions and make weird volleyball metaphors, but he doesn’t know… this. He doesn’t know what to do with this. With you. With the ever-aching feeling swirling in his diaphragm. 

“I can…” He pauses. “I don’t have to go—” 

“Are you insane?” You’re bordering on a shout when you whip your head towards him, brows furrowed in what looks to be aggravation and eyes wide in disbelief. He blinks at you. All of this is unfamiliar, every aspect of this conversation—the look in your eyes, the crease between your eyebrows, the anger in your voice, the fear and sadness that had planted itself in your expression just moments before. Shoyo is treading knee-deep in unfamiliar waters and he doesn’t know what to do with the violent tides that sweep beneath his feet. 

“I would— I would never hold you back from your dreams, Shoyo,” you spit at him. The meaning of your words is well-placed, but the tone of your voice makes his eyes widen in fear and his form shrink back. “Never. I’m your b—est friend, and this is what you’ve fought for your whole life. I wouldn’t hold you back from this just because of some stupid, selfish wish.” 

The force behind your voice crumbles, tears welling up in those shattered-silver-stars as your expression twists—it’s ugly, and it’s raw. A sob escapes you and God, Shoyo has never felt so strongly for something in so long.

He breaks. He sobs. You fall into each other’s arms, clutching onto one another desperately as if that will keep Hinata Shoyo from flying away. 

(It doesn’t.) 

(Shoyo never asks you what your stupid, selfish wish was all about.) 

Hinata Shoyo loves you. 

He tells you this after years of waiting. He doesn’t tell you this at the airport when he leaves for Brazil, or in the one visit he took back to Japan during his time playing beach volleyball on the other side of the world. He doesn’t tell you this during the calls you share with him in his early mornings and your afternoons. He waits, because Hinata Shoyo has learned how to wait. 

Shoyo has landed himself a place on a professional volleyball team. You’ve voiced your elation over this fact countless times, over calls and text and blurry selfies of you with tears in your eyes and a stupid, wide smile on your face. Work has been busy for you, but when he tells you “Come to my game, it’s a big one. I’m seeing Tobio again,” you don't hesitate for a second to call in sick and buy a ticket. 

(It’s expensive, and when Hinata finds out how much you paid for it he chastises you playfully, claiming that he would’ve gotten you a ticket for free.) 

He wins. Of course he wins. Shoyo flies and laughs and plays and he wins. He catches your eye in the crowd after the game ends and he smiles, reserved for you and you only, and you can’t help but smile back. 

You meet him hours after his game ends—interviews and cleaning up and whatnot take an awfully long time. You both sit on a park bench, having walked quietly side-by-side for half an hour until he reached a spot he deemed perfect for the evening. 

It’s not the same patch of grass you both used to sit in, but it’s something, and you think Shoyo is more than enough to make up for the lack of a familiar atmosphere. It’s a bit cold, but you think it’s a shame you remembered your jacket—glancing at Shoyo, you find that he looks so much warmer than the fabric you’re wearing. 

Shoyo is glancing at you too, soft smile and warm eyes and gentle flush and all, and his head is ringing loudly trying to process every detail of your presence. 

Hinata Shoyo loves you. 

(God, he loves you so much. So he tells you.)

It’s a very simple ordeal. 

You open your mouth, and he thinks you’re starting to say something like “that was a good game!” or any other mundane praise, and he knows that he should let you speak. But he’s been building up this adrenaline for years now, and nothing can stop him when he says “I love you” in that gentle tone he reserves just for you. 

You stop talking. Shoyo thinks that maybe a rejection is coming soon, but he can’t bring himself to be so upset about it. Because he did it—did what he’s been yearning to do ever since that one afternoon in his last year of high school, and the thought alone makes him invincible to whatever comes out of this very spontaneous confession. 

He tilts his head towards you. You’re staring at him. He smiles again, wide and unabashed and warm. He feels your warm lips on his and he knows he should push you away for the sake of his PR team. But, God, Hinata Shoyo is invincible right now, and getting caught in some mundane “scandal” misinterpreted by the media is the least of his concerns right now. 

(Hinata Shoyo loves you. 

He tells you, now, in subtle ways, like the way he drags his fingers against your face when you’re still sleeping, the way he kisses your temple in half-hazy consciousness, and the way he traces the ring on your left ring finger with his lips.) 

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