#...But I suppose I need rest first
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Sorry for vanishing guys. I'm still alive, just... taking a break from social media. My mental health has not been kind to me these past few months, and I found that I... Just haven't been able to reblog and do things like I used to on here. Not to mention college. College has been eating up a lot of my time.
I don't know why things are like this for me, but like this they are. I keep telling myself I'll come back one of these days, but so far nothing has stuck.
So yeah. TL;DR: I'm still alive, just gone dormant. I hope to be back one day for real though. When? I do not know. But someday.
#she speaks#life update#even just writing this up#and tagging it#is taking up energy#I feel so damn unmotivated writing wise#stresses of life getting to me I suppose#and just poking around my dash on here#just makes me feel worse#so I haven't been on here#I'm okay though#just...going through the motions I suppose#nobody's fault#I want to write again...#...But I suppose I need rest first#don't I?
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Hi it's just to let you know that the official romanization of Revaan's name is Raverne ! Also they have romanized Baul's name to Baur !
Twst coming back at us again with the least expected romanization! thank you everybody (oh god my inbox) (no it's great, I literally asked for this and the reactions have been INCREDIBLE, thank you all!)
I do like Raverne though, I think it's got a nice fancy sound to it! (I had kinda suspected it was going to be an R instead of an L, so the fact that it's SO close to Laverne except for that is hilarious to me personally.) and Dragoneye Duke is honestly probably the best translation for his title, I wasn't envying the localizers that one. :') Baur instead of Baul I was NOT expecting, but in retrospect I think his name's supposed to be a reference to the Bauru crocodile, so that actually makes way more sense!
someone else also said Meleanor has become Maleanor, which is the REALLY weird one to me, because I was so surprised it was written as Mel instead of Mal in the first place?! oh god no I can't decide which one I like better. 😭 (I wonder if they might change it to Mal...they have made romanization changes before) (like I remember House of Distraction being corrected to House of Destruction in Playful Land) (I did check and she's still Mel for now, but I dunno, they might Mal her up and some point and save me from having to make a decision about which one to use) (HECK I CAN'T DECIDE)
uhhhh thank you for letting me ramble about anime names, let's just say MONOGRAMMED SWEATERS FOR EVERYONE
#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 4 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 4 spoilers#mel is so cute but mal fits with the rest of the draconias better#eng version no you were supposed to save me not make things MORE confusing#anyway raverne huh#that uh. that sure feels like it's supposed to evoke raven doesn't it.#what does it mean WHAT DOES IT MEAN#hold on i'm going to flail around embarrassingly about anime character theories now#(okay first a disclaimer: i do think we need to sit down as a fandom at some point)#(and have a discussion about exactly what is actual canon versus meta speculation versus jokes)#(because i think there has been. some confusion. over that re:crowley and raverne specifically)#(but i do feel justified in being like THEY ARE PROBABLY CONNECTED SOMEHOW RIGHT?! right now)#like i really don't think it's as simple as crowley being raverne but with memory loss or something#(and if they pull that on us i'm going to need an EXTREMELY good explanation to go with it to justify that)#they've gone out of their way several times now to make a point about them acting and sounding different and it feels very intentional to m#(and once again: i super 100% absolutely do not believe that lilia wouldn't recognize him with the top half of his face covered)#i just think the contradictions are a lot stronger than the connections right now but there ARE some connections and i'm 👀ing at them#to be fair the connections are mostly meta like crowley being diablo/raverne being evocative of raven#also the general 'raverne mysteriously disappeared and apparently had distinctive eyes' thing#versus 'crowley's past is unknown and he never shows his eyes'#(i will argue that crowley DOES seem to have some kind of canon connection to briar valley)#(since he is clearly some sort of fae and the masks are a briar valley thing)#and that is kinda it right now isn't it#okay hold on i had to delete some tags because i used too many (thanks tumblr for letting me know and not just vanishing them OH WAIT)#so tl;dr: i'm in the 'crowley is connected to raverne somehow but it's more complicated than just him being in disguise' camp personally#but that will probably change as we get more info and also don't take this as an anti-speculation thing because i love theories HOORAY
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i’ll find you again in every universe. let us be a little more honest, let us have a little more time.
#vashwood#vash the stampede#nicholas d wolfwood#trigun#despite it all though badlands rumble is like. the only universe where we get wolfwood thinking vash died first... and i think that means a#lot to their relationship and how it may bloom if there was more to badlands rumble considering vash literally saw wolfwood carrying a piece#of vash after his supposed death. u know! despite the short time they were together vash still meant so much to wolfwood that he couldn't#just move on or forget him in anyway. needed to keep a piece of him for himself and the rest of his days. but ofc vash lives and wolfwood#was like ill beat ur fucking ass into tomorrow. there's just so much honesty in vash being able to see that gesture bc he wouldnt know#otherwise just how much he might mean to him. ANYWAY. trimax with with the eternal pining featuring the two chapters where imo#where the both of them really fell for each other... i wrote my thoughts about this on another comic i did before#but vash solidifying his feelings during the hospital arc -- ww solidifies his when he realizes his allegiances are permanently with vash#98 my lovelies but also to me they are so one-sided bc ww pined like no tomorrow and vash only realizes after ep 23?24? his heart did tickle#whenever ww complimented his smile though#and tristamp vw my beloveds. it really just feels like they get the chance to be closer and closer and more honest with each other#with every version that comes about. in trimax they knew how little time they had but struggled so desperately to get closer. in 98 ww felt#more willing to forsake for vash. in badlands rumble theyre Angry but as mentioned earlier ^ more blatant truth... due to circumstances#mainly but has the chance to lead to discussions and tristamp literally. first day of knowing each other ww saves vash - 2 days later vash#saves ww like. Man. AND NOW THEY MAY POTENTIALLY GET EVEN CLOSER!!!! with s2....#ruporas art
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Kotlc thumbnail sketches
some thumbnail sketches i drew of different kotlc sceneries !!💗
i think my fav one ended up being elysian island but im curious whats yalls favorite??
#first time drawing on photoshop !!!! still getting used to it#the forest grove is from when sophie dex and grady were looking for the sasquash in the opening scene of exile#the one that says alluveterre is supposed to be keefes room with all the little notes on the wall and floor#andd i dont think the rest need any extra context#but this was really fun to do probably gonna do some more with other sceneries ‼️#kotlc#kotlc fanart#keeper of the lost cites fanart#keeper of the lost cities#kotlc stellarlune spoilers
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radioapple doodle inspired by that one blitzo/human stolas scene :3
I bet alastor would enjoy the powertrip of making the king of hell so flustered. What a menace. ;) You can decide what he's whispering in luci's ear to make him blush
#I'll probably redo this later with an actual reference of the scene#I just needed to get my shippy feelings out ASAP#mine#my first time drawing alastor and you can only see like .25 of an eyeball lmao the rest is that fuckass bob#ngl this was supposed to be really quick but goddamn wtf are alastors bangs?? took way to fucking long to do and im still not happy with it#No the heights dont make sense dont worry about it#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel lucifer#hazbin lucifer#lucifer hazbin hotel#lucifer magne#lucifer#lucifer morningstar#hazbin alastor#hazbin hotel alastor#hellaverse#alastor the radio demon#radioapple#appleradio#lucifer x alastor#alastor x lucifer#dad beat dad#hazbin hotel fanart#duckiedeer#hazbin art
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Happy Valentines, Akira. Happy Valentines, Asshole.
If you can’t read what Akechi’s secondary inner-dialogue says cause I obscured it too much behind his regular dialogue, here’s a transcription in panel order: Hello, you fucking- Ah- Hello, Akira! Fuck off, why should I tell you- Just a soda- there’s a new flavor.
I don’t want your shitty gift. Oh- haha! You’re so sweet.
I hope I choke. They’re lovely, thank you.
Like hell. Likewise. There’s no way it’s just a coincidence. Still though, it’s a funny coincidence.
#p5#akeshu#akechi goro#kurusu akira#wow- me?? posting a valentines comic... actually on?? valentines????? wack. absolutely wack#it's a short one! I purposefully tried to keep it short. it was a challenge and it still ended up being 3 pages. but i blame my canvas size#also in case u can't see what akira is holding out to akechi: theyre chocolate covered strawberries on sticks!#i saw them irl and was like oh god i want those. i am going to project that feeling on my favorite characters so help me god#and now! here we are! but my shitty-ass coloring & line quality make it hard to discern them so. sorry about that lmaooooo#ANYWAY i don't do enough post-maruki stuff so. i made this one a little bittersweet. :)#why did i put akechi's scarf in a bow? honestly i dont know! i think i saw some art a while ago that did that too and i thought it was cute#well. plus i guess there's the symbolism of 'akechi being alive and reciprocating your feelings (however involuntarily) IS a gift' part#hence that hes wrapped up in a bow. like a present. :)#also god. the first panel is supposed to be akechi's reflection in a vending machine window. I could NOT get it to look right#so for reference!!! just so you guys understand!!!!!! thats what that panel is supposed to be!!! he is NOT in fact a ghost. (sigh)#hope you enjoyed and had a lovely valentines!! for my part i have eaten nothing but sweets today and hoo boy will that have been a mistake#ALSO in terms of the audience-participation comic...hopefully coming soon. if i can ever gain the will to draw it.#but at least tumblr has polls now so i can do the audience-choose-y bit without needing to use a separate website! so thats good i guess#anyway anyway anway thanks for listening to me ramble if you made it this far! have a lovely rest of your day and hopefully see u again soon
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sheet for kian
victor's sheet
#oc: kian micelli#ts4#I feel the need to bring out some backstory#Kian leaves his house early because he planned to start a career in a big city and he worked hard to make that happen.#He got a position where he may be promoted after getting a degree and achieving his dream job#but he didn't enjoy it as much as he was expecting which broke him#He returned home and soon discovered that he supposed to stay there#Victor however would work in his parents' business for the rest of his life but he found it difficult to adapt to adulthood#He dropped out of college moved out with his parents and is now attempting to figure out his future steps#and they first met at this point#Kian gave himself time to work with his parents all summer before beginning looking for a job#Victor wants to begin a new life.#Before Victor’s family lived there but after several problems that include his brother they left#and now that he’s returned rumors about his family keep being spread so he needs to find a strength#oc stuff#my sims
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Obi Wan Kenobi was dead.
Obi Wan Kenobi was dead, and Anakin Skywalker, now called Vader, came to in his bacta tank knowing that he had killed him.
It should have felt better.
There was gone the last chain tethering him to his lost youth, there was gone his once brother, now nemesis, there was gone the man who had left him in this half-machine state. Lord Vader had had his revenge.
Anakin Skywalker felt empty.
He had dreamed of it for years, spent two decades imagining what it would be like. It should have brought joy, elation. More even than the thundering, rapid pleasure the Sith had a taste in. Peace.
This is the man who you can blame for the death of Padmé, he tried to remind himself. The hole that was remained where Obi Wan's presence had been whispered back: you, your choice, killed her.
There was only Anakin Skywalker to take the blame. For everything.
#did I just write a fanfic? seems so#this is inspired by that post I don't remember which that said Vader must have felt really disappointed after killing Obi-Wan#because he had spent so much time focused on him and it didn't solve his problems#don't worry he'll soon change his mind and start blaming palpatine for all his mistakes (partly right tbh)#and try to find his son and overthrow him because one needs a goal in life#...I suppose this is happening sometime between 4 and 5#after Vader has had his first opportunity to properly rest since the Death Star escape business#anakin skywalker#obi wan kenobi#darth vader#star wars#star wars fanfiction#fanfic#my post
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(click for better quality)
Sammy watching Yaz compete, wishing her good luck <33
Yasammy fanart, wishing we get to see it in Chaos Theory. I mean, Sammy watching Yaz compete, if that was unclear 👀
I really didn't bother doing the background cool. I never have the patience to draw a background, I usually just have a color or two covering the white background. So, it looks weird, and that's how it is
#jwcc#yasmina fadoula#sammy gutierrez#camp cretaceous#jurassic world camp cretaceous#I've seen people having cool “*name* draws” or “*name* drawing” and i don't have a cool name on here to tj it is i guess#yasammy#jurassic world chaos theory#Jwcc fanart#Tj drawing#ooooh cool I'll tag all my fanart posts with that#My first tag with “I've seen people having bla bla bla” moved up itself and not i can't take it down#it's supposed to be under my “oooooh cool I'll tag bla bla bla”#ugh I'm having a bad day today#now I'll lay under a rock the rest of the day#oh right i can't#i have a novel due today i need to do#end my life for a min now plz#but for NOW#yasammy <33
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Louis de Pointe Du Lac 'In Throes of Increasing Wonder'
#ah i was supposed to post earlier but next week I'lll have a better schedule with the queue#ldpdl.txt#vampterview#amc iwtv#iwtv#interview with the vampire#amc interview with the vampire#louis de pointe du lac#I always found a certain amount of grace in louis that yk is beautifully displayed in the first episode#tho ofc it continues through the rest of the series#the crossing of legs bein here and then yk in the lil clip we got of s2 you see him doin the same crossing legs but armand is also joining#body language and such if that makes sense oh lil things of how we do not see his face or facial journey when the tape is heard his whole#body is turned away from daniel and the audience and yeah he was bein disrespectful#and its like as we get more pieces of the puzzle the more certain things make sense the more dynamics are just getting crazier#i felt a newer light after rewatching the trailers and lil clip and ik itll just be such an eye opener when we get to see all of s2 (puzzle#anyways im getting off topic my brain goes from x to a louis is just so gorgeous and the way he sits is as a dancer even continuing to in#later eps entrancing like you want to be near him and when he starts the story his laugh its like you know you need to be near him#In Throes of Increasing Wonder
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…. Just so we all know this is the stage from where I need to pull my little clone portraits together
#Wip#my art#and then I will merge my sketch and paint layers together and the messing around starts for real#but FIRST I need to figure out my colours for good#haven’t struggled with them so much in a very very long time I feel like#shadows and mid tones and secondary light source and all that aaaah#I need to switch my brain off a little between commissions#I swore I was normal about that Tem gifset didn’t I?#then I stumbled into a fic where Rex picks up the horrible habit of smoking while on leave and here I am#I know I messed up something in my sketch that I will suffer to try and fix later but even when I flip it it doesn’t look TOO bad#he looks FINE in the reference window#which I will take at this point#the sketch took me as long as the other portraits from first line to colour adjustments lol#purple is giving me hell…. it’s time I run away and live out the rest of my life as a hermit away from civilization I suppose
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I MISSED THIS ENTIRELY MY FIRST TIME AROUND....THIS IS SO DAMN PRECIOUS?!!
#bg3 spoilers#thoughts about media#this is so sweet. corydalis would cherish this present to the end of his days.#so nice of mirkon to say we killed the harpies in one blow!#we did not.#I couldn't long rest and reset corydalis' empty spell slots because the scene was glitching and the kid would spawn dead.#so i had to forgo the long rest and just fight them.#and then astarion and karlach kept getting lured by the harpy song!#lae'zel was the only one getting anything done!#and she sure as fuck didn't even want to be there!! i brought her to try and boost her approval...#but it's like. stuck at 6 or something equally abysmal because I keep pissing her off by being too nice.#I didn't realise there was an interaction between her and a tiefling in the grove in my first playthrough...she hated me more after that.#GIRL I'M NOT GOING TO MAKE ZORRU BOW FOR YOU!#like corydalis is a tiefling himself! be real lae'zel!#being nice to zorru got us the information we needed anyways...#astarion for whatever reason didn't complain even though i'm pretty sure being too nice in this interaction is supposed to annoy him.#i'm literally LOOKING for interactions to gain his disapproval!!!!!#BECAUSE HIS APPROVAL WON'T GO DOWN!!!!!!!!!#please my dearest I would like to NOT trigger your first romance scene too soon.#honestly if i could romance him without suffering through that again I would be thrilled. but it is not possible.#REALISTICALLY corydalis wouldn't even fall for his lying. he's ten times better a liar than astarion could ever hope to be.#and he's also extremely kind and caring! there's noooo WAY he'd let astarion's evasiveness slide unmentioned.#BUT ALAS. the game only permits you to avoid this TORMENTUOUS experience if you are playing karlach.#goblin camp is next though. I'm SURE I can earn disapproval there with him.#he may be allergic to disagreeing with my tiefling but this is still act 1 astarion! he is a bitter HATER with no healthy outlet.#I just have to like. oh I don't know. offer to help some random npc and ask for nothing in return.
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#plusle#i think lots of people have a thing against plusle and minun. folks as a general rule just don't seem to like them from my experience#i don't really know why. i got to know plusle from pkmn colosseum and i didn't even know there was a minun#so the first time i ever saw a minun i was like. why is it blue. it's supposed to be red#but then again i also never used that plusle that you get in colosseum because like. sure‚ you get it already purified#but you get it at like level thirteen. when all of the rest of your team is probably around level 30. it's just not really viable#at the point in the game where you get it. it's way too low of a level. unless you wanna spend a thousand years grinding it up which i tried#to do in pyrite but they kept just targeting it and knocking it out so i couldn't get any XP on it. and XP share was either bad or non-#existent at that point i believe so i just kinda left it in the box. i tried to catch every shadow pokémon anyway so y'know#didn't really need it. i also don't remember why they give you a plusle anyway. in the plot. i just remember it being like. a gift pokémon#and it being level 13 which is way too low. so here's plusle i'll have way less to say about minun
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The more I think about The Bad Batch as a complete show but incomplete story, the more I think that if they’re doing what I think they could be doing, the more I think it could work really well from a storytelling perspective. So well that I’m actually annoyed about it.
#the bad batch#yes I’m still on my ‘I don’t think the story is over’ bullshit#the Hunter-Omega relationship arc resolved and it actually resolved very well#nothing else resolved at all#not even Crosshair#not completely anyway#a lot of my criticisms about the finale come from a place#of thinking that the bad batch is a very good show#that’s mostly very well written and thematically consistent#but which simply doesn’t end#apart from the Hunter-Omega-Tantiss plot#it all just kind of stops#I actually think “the cavalry has arrived#works very well as a season finale#which#I think that’s what it is#we didn’t get a long finale#we got episodes fifteen and sixteen bunched together I think#you can almost see where the credits are supposed to roll after the first half#and the thing is#as long as we’re getting more in some form#even if—perhaps especially if—there’s a shift in the POV character#I’m actually okay with that#it’s a good show I just need the rest of the story#now if that is what’s happening#if this is a story artificially cut in half with a POV shift partway through#I still think this is the most batshit way to handle it from an audience expectation perspective#and I don’t appreciate that AT ALL#for MANY reasons
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Rereading trigun cause of the reprint,, and in his wanted poster. One of the first things the audience sees of vash, it says he might be 24. VASH IS SUSPECTED TO BE 24. Yet he goes through so much grief and happiness, and he tries his best to hide it all. To be a picture of strength, but he is only 24. (Yes I know he is 150)
And like going through hardships, and being 24 myself it's really like man. I have carried this same grief as he has, faked a smile as he has, and had those moments of happiness that vash has. And that's what being 24 has been like.
Its wild, when he becomes Erik's he will be 26, and have tried to hide from who he was in the start of maximum. Vash's grief is soooo understandable, he is only 24 when trigun starts
#trigun#vash the stampede#i have had 2 days of sad vash hours#cause i forgot why i fell in love with trigun. with vash. or maybe more like pushed it out of my mind#now rereading it im more seperated from the family events that shaped my early 20s and im out of the relationship i was in when i got into#trigun. i relate sooo much to vash and i forgot exactly how much. this realization. of that vash is supposed to be 24 is crazy#i forgot so much of the plot too#the half coins. that there is 12 gun ho guns ( i thought there was 7 ). how wolfwood was introduced#they had just met. maybe spent half a day or a day in the caravan and went their seperate ways. ww went to the meeting thinking this is a >#a job. but immediately thinks these people arent human and were sent by god. only to see an angelic gun shoot the moon.#THEY JUST MET. they met for a day#wolfwood meets vash. watches him get turned into a gun and shoot the moon. THEN SPENDS THE NEXT 2 YEARS LOOKING FOR VASH#I FORGOT ALL ABOUT THAT#also that milly is the only one who notices when vash is upset . she is the only one in the first 2 volumes that see behind his mask#Ougghhghhh#anyway i was already planning on getting the whole series. despite not having any space. but man the feelings just confirm i need the rest#trigun manga
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god i cannot wait to be off these steroids…
#marzi speaks#marzivents#<- it’s late n i’m kinda pent up abt this#i’m so TIRED of themmmm#i’m probs gonna be on them for the rest of the year. which SUCKSSS#i don’t like how many ppl comment on the moon face#i don’t mind it. like i look in a mirror and i’m okay.#it’s a little weird. but like. just because it’s different. like getting used to a new haircut#but every time i see someone for the first time in a bit it’s ‘woah your face got rounder’#and i have to go ‘oh yeah it’s water retention- steroids thing it’ll go away when i’m able to go off ‘em’#and they go ‘oh alright :) you still look good btw don’t worry’#and i just. i HATE how people talk about it!! like jfc. it’s so clear that they think it’s like kinda sad#my dad said he thinks it’s cute and he’s the only one i actually think is telling the truth there#my mom and i agree that it doesn’t matter. but even then she tries to tell me not to panic#like a little extra squish in my face is something to panic over#it’s so clear that so many people see it as another thing to pity#oh poor thing. has that chronic illness for the rest of her life. and the steroids made her jaw look rounder :(#like jfc i knew fatphobia was prevalent but come the fuck on. literally i’m like barely retaining water for steroids too#like. i’m still very much skinny (i JUST finished being malnourished ffs) but bc i’m retaining water in my face#now ppl feel the need to comfort me. over this tiny cosmetic thing that does not matter#like. i wouldn’t feel weird abt it if it weren’t for everyone else making it such a THING. why is everyone so weird about it#i’m not insecure about it but when ppl try to comfort me or go ‘it’s not that bad’ it makes me feel like i’m SUPPOSED to be insecure abt it#and it drives me NUTS. bc there are things about being on steroids that i would love to be comforted about#but the water retention is not one of them. i couldn’t give a rat’s ass about the water retention#y’know what i’d like to be comforted over? the mood swings. the irritability. the insomnia. the appetite fluctuation#the slow healing of skin. thinning and dryness in the skin. having to take like 3 other medications alongside the steroid#bc taking the steroid causes side effects that need to be medically treated or prevented#even outside of the steroid! i’d like some comfort about having to build back my stamina from scratch#i’d like some comfort about having the worst balance i’ve had in years#there’s. more to this. but i’m out of tags. maybe i’ll make some replies idk. i’m just. UGH
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