#....has the group broken up or something but in friendly terms and with good memories - bittersweetness and all that

[startanewdream]

Five Stages of Starflower

Summary: James is oblivious, Lily is mostly okay with her unrequited love and Sirius has a few plans about this situation. For @keepingupwithpotters,@sunshine-marauders, @cellularphoneexplosion and @zephyrcove who all gave me the most Jily prompt of all time (“Are you flirting with me?” “You finally noticed?”) and for @magixbeans (“I refuse to stop irritating you until you give me attention.”). Thanks for helping me celebrate this day ❤

Warning only for a few f-words every now and then (Lily curses when she is upset).

Sirius knows it.

Sirius fucking Black knows it.

Lily had been careful ever since last semester when she started to realize the signs of those things. She’d tried to back away, to avoid more contact despite the fact they had exchanged letters through Summer (just normal conversation, talking about what was going on and their families and discussing their friends – it didn’t mean anything), and that they had seen each other (they just happened to be on Diagon Alley on the same day to shopping, which was smarter and safer—and also didn’t mean anything), and Lily had convinced herself that her feelings for him were entirely friendly and would remain so—if only they hadn’t become Heads together.

There was no way her feelings could remain amicable when she was required to stay together with James Potter for hours at a time, alone in the Prefects Room as they worked and planned, their hands brushing against each other sometimes; or when they would run away to share a hot chocolate at the kitchen, enjoying the fact that as Head Boy and Head Girl they could ignore a little more the curfew, and he’d make her laugh and would help her wipe off the chocolate out of the corner of her mouth.

Lily had fancied someone before, and she knew how to identify the signs, as pale as those previous signs seemed when it came to James. Still, she knew what meant the way she would shiver whenever he’d touched her, or how her heart would skip a beat when their eyes met without planning and he would grin deviously at her or how she would sit closer to him than she needed, just to catch a sniff more of that wonderful scent.

She was falling for James Potter and the worst part was that she’d totally missed the timing in which he fancied her back.

Because all those signs she saw in herself were unfortunately absent from him. James had apparently mastered the art of considering her as nothing more than his friend, because when he’d touched the corner of her mouth—and she had blinked to him, she really had, a blink that said we are alone now and you are touching my mouth can you just kiss me?—James had done nothing but smile nicely, friendly, drawing away.

And she absolutely knew he was treating her as just his friend when the very next week he’d asked her if she didn’t mind changing her Friday patrol rounds with Leanne Diggory. Fridays were the day they patrolled together until late in the night. Fridays were the days where they would go to the kitchen and share a drink and talk about life and it was their moment.

‘Sure,' she had said, acting as if she didn’t understand what his request meant for them. ‘Any particular reason?’

James had flushed then, his hand automatically flying to his hair like he did when he was nervous and after a moment he glanced at Leanne across the Prefects Room. Lily had followed the direction of his gaze; Leanne was smiling back at James and Lily understood even more.

‘Well,’ she said then, keeping her voice carefully light even as a crushing weight had taken residence in her chest. ‘It’s a pretty reason.'

She couldn’t fault James for not being interested in her anymore, but she couldn’t also just stop feeling that thing for him, not since there was no way for her to avoid him completely. So she resigned herself to having a platonic crush on James Potter, one that she administered very well until the day of the first Quidditch game of the season.

Lily had been so diligent that none of her friends had noticed her feelings for him—and she knew that because there was no way Mary or Dorcas would keep it silent if they suspected. She had been careful not to gasp when they were on the grounds and James had been dropped at the lake by Sirius, stepping out of the water and taking off his shirt to dry himself (but she had taken that memory to her heart and lost herself in dreams about him); she had not frowned when she saw James leaving his group at the last Hogsmeade trip to go talk with Leanne, flashing that dangerous grin of his to her (but she had punched her pillow in anger lately, wishing James had come to her).

And then there was the first Quidditch match and Gryffindor had won and in the post-game euphoria, Lily had made the tiny mistake of hugging James and keeping that guilty longing smile on her face when they had broken apart.

That’s when her gaze had met Sirius, and he had widened his eyes in surprise, taking in all that her smile meant—by the time Lily had rearranged her face into a normal expression, Sirius was smirking knowingly, that moron.

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

He knows. Lily knows he knows. Sirius knows Lily knows he knows.

It could be worse if it were any of other James’ friends, she reasons dismayingly. Remus would have come to talk to her and urge her to share her feelings with James; Peter would spill the word to James, unable to keep a secret from him.

But it doesn’t look like any of these other scenarios is really worse as she sees Sirius’ eyes shining with a predatory look, like a wolf that knows it got his prey.

She considers running away. But Lily is no coward, there is no place for her to go permanently and she believes in keeping her enemies closer, if Sirius could be considered as one, at any chance. That’s why she keeps her ground, pretending everything is nice and not at all bothered when she sees James is near the fireplace talking with Leanne Diggory.

It won’t fool Sirius, but Lily can keep her dignity at least.

And remaining alone at the drinks table allows for him to get closer to her, which is important for her to check how much damage she did today.

‘Enjoying the party, Evans?’

Lily nearly sighs. Nearly one year of friendship with the Marauders told her they only call her by the last name when they are in full teasing mode.

James calls her a lot by Evans, though, but it sounds nice and she rather likes it.

‘Same as always. Nice party.'

‘Oh, I thought you’d be feeling… too crowded.' Sirius throws a glance towards the fireplace and Lily doesn’t need to follow the direction of his gaze to know what he is talking about. ‘Maybe you wish you were at one of those Head meetings.'

Lily pretends to be amused. ‘Heads can enjoy parties too.'

‘One of the Heads is certainly enjoying the party if the party is happening back at the throat of Leanne Diggory—’

She can control her eyes enough to not look in their direction to confirm how literal Sirius is being right now, but she cannot stop the grimace on her face fast enough; it is a spasm of hurt and anger and jealousy, and it becomes obvious that Sirius saw all these emotions when his grin just increases.

Well, too late to still save her dignity.

‘Good for him. Now, if you excuse me—’

‘Oh, I don’t,’ he replies gladly. ‘Why, you seem a little green to me, Evans.'

‘It’s my eyes, maybe you didn’t notice their colour before.'

‘Well, I never particularly cared, but I remember a young bloke reciting that your eyes were pure emerald bestowing grace upon that poor bloke’s heart.'

‘Jade,’ she corrects before she can think better of it. ‘He compared them to jades.'

Sirius’ grin is criminal now. At least, it’s making her want to murder him.

‘My, Evans, for someone that threw a hex at him you seem to have memorized his words.'

‘He kneeled to recite that poem to me in the middle of the Common Room, what else could I do?’

‘Snogged him?’ Sirius suggests, arching one eyebrow when Lily shakes her head. ‘Just imagine, if you had snogged him back then, he might not be snogging someone else right now.'

It’s a fair assumption, but this time Lily doesn’t have to disguise any particular emotion. She doesn’t regret not going out with James before; they were far too different back then. He matured a lot since those days when he would ask her out when he would be so infatuated with her that it was annoying mostly…

Unfortunately, in the list of things he changed since growing up, his feelings for her were included.

That makes her frown.

‘He is free to do whatever he wants,’ she says, a safe mid-term.

‘Or whoever he wants.’

She closes her fists, wanting to punch something; most likely Sirius’ face, though she will settle for her pillow too.

‘Are you here for any reason or you just want to piss me, Black?’

‘Mentioning that James’ hands are all over Diggory’s bum would piss you?’

‘Ah, fuck off, Sirius,’ she says, not bothering anymore to pretend anything.

He laughs—a loud carefree sound that seems like a dog’s bark to warn that something is happening; in this case, that Lily Evans is making a fool of herself.

‘I will leave you alone—if you just admit it.’

‘Admit what?’

'Are we really playing this game, Evans? Let's not go through the five stages of Lily Evans' acceptance of her undying love for James Potter, shall we?'

Lily blinks, fighting not to splurge over her drink.

'I have no idea what you are talking about, Sirius.'

'Have it your way then. I just thought you should know, I was kidding. James' tongue is carefully kept inside his mouth.'

And he indicates the fireplace. Lily looks at it now and, sure enough, though James is still talking to Leanne, he is fairly apart from her, hands untouching, in a friendly stance.

When she looks back, Sirius is not there anymore, but wherever he is she knows he is smirking, that prat. Continue reading on AO3 :)

[thisstableground]

do you have any hcs for if usnavi's parents hadn't died? it would change him and his story a lot and I feel like it could be really interesting, how he's still him but with such different experiences. and you write him and get his character so well so you're definitely the person to ask about this kind of thing if you're up for it :) (also as a fellow brit the uk au is really really weird to me, I can't quite work out why)

(lmao ikr? i wouldn’t actually call it a uk au because i firmly do not believe it could work as a fully-fledged idea without changing way too much about a very culturally specific story in a way that has very uncomfortable implications, tho it is hilarious to briefly entertain the idea of ITH except it’s all set in fuckin milton keynes or something because Simply No Thank You)

THIS WILL BE LONG, BUCKLE UP

i think that a lot of canon usnavis traits are perhaps things he already had but that got magnified by a huge amount after losing his parents, because they could also be seen as ADHD traits; particularly the anxiety and the difficulty with making changes or starting new things. he’s still worried about messing up, about making a fool of himeslf, or just doesnt have the executive functioning to do things. but the difference is prior to losing his parents he had a lot more optimism and self-confidence to push himself past those anxieties or to find it easier to listen to his friends and family when they encourage him, because he has this certainty when he’s younger that things will turn out okay. an usnavi who never loses his parents carries that certainty into adulthood (i think even after abuela passes, because while it’s difficult and tragic for him, it isn’t deeply traumatising in the same way). so this version of usnavi still worries about failure, but the stakes are so much lower; he might embarrass himself but he has the safety net of his parents support, whereas the fear that fuels canon usnavi’s difficulty with changing things or moving forward is “what if i fuck up and lose someone else important to me again?”, where things which aren’t actually literal life-or-death tend to feel that way to him, and he’s a lot more cynical about whether things will have a positive outcome.

with his parents still alive doesn’t find it so terrifying to look into the future – “today’s all we got”, he says in the opening song, and i think he would still say that but in a way that means “live for today, live in the moment, enjoy life”. that might be the attitude he’s trying to get across in canon, but he also uses it as a way to hold himself back and keep himself stuck in place, to not let himself hope for anything in the future: in canon, he knows in a very painful way that he isn’t promised a future, and nobody he loves is promised a future, so why make plans or hypotheticals or even seriously believe that he’ll ever go back to DR? (i genuinely think there’s a subconscious part of him that’s firmly convinced he’s going to die young, but that’s a whole other tangent). he’s living in the moment because he’s scared of what he’ll see when he looks past it; usnavi with his parents still around lives in the moment because he likes the moment he’s in.

i wonder if him and vanessa would have ended up dating, or at least if they’d have been so successful and long-lasting as a couple. they’e always known each other and got on well, but i see their deeper feelings as growing out of  this shared understanding between them based on the difficulties they’ve been through – would they have still had the champagne bet, if usnavi didn’t have that grief and loss and extra responsibility that drives his vague non-plans to go live in DR? would he even want to leave new york, in this version, or would he still be content with the place he grew up because it doesn’t have those painful memories? 

the character arc of reconciling moving forward from a place that symbolises a painful past without having to completely sever from the good things about it is something that both of them share in canon. without those moments of both being given too many responsibilities and too much independence way too young because they don’t have parents who can ease the transition into adulthood, or this unspoken recognition that even with all their barrio family around both of them are very much on their own in some ways, would they make the deeper emotional connection that makes them work so well together in a more long-term way? or would they just have gone on a few casual dates that didn’t stand out from any other casual dates they might have with others?

and hell, maybe usnavi would’ve already been in a relationship with someone completely different – he’d be working at the store with two other people who were experienced in running it. he’d have so much more time to go out, have a social life, go to clubs and hang out with more people his own age. usnavi after losing his parents became quite disconnected from the larger group of people him and benny would hang out with at school; he doesn’t have the time, he doesn’t have the energy, and for a long time while he’s still so deep in grief i think they find it hard to know how to be friends with this quiet, broken, listless usnavi. they’re all still friendly but internally i think he loses his sense of place with his peers because he’s been rapidly catapulted into a stage of life that none of them are in. an usnavi who doesn’t lose his parents also doesn’t lose his sense of being around the same level and life stage as his peers, so who knows who he meets or develops feelings for?

his relationship with sonny is definitely different. his love and care for him isn’t so full of fear, because he doesn’t feel this need to protect him from every little thing or like it’s his personal responsibility to keep him alive, because it doesn’t really occur to him that he could lose him. canon usnavi i think has a lot more of a somewhat parental vibe, and often an overprotective parent at that. i think this usnavi, because he doesn’t have to grow up so quickly and he isn’t sonny’s boss, has much more of a fun big brother role. and i think sonny in return doesn’t feel so much responsibility for usnavi as he grows up - he doesnt feel like he has to force him to have fun or get some rest or put himself first every so often because usnavi doesnt push himself nearly so relentlessly and because his parents can look out for him when he does. 

maybe sonny doesn’t start working in the bodega until much later, either – a lot of why he spends so much time there is because usnavi watches him while his mom’s at work but can’t just close the store. if his parents are there to keep working then usnavi watches sonny at one of their homes, or they go out and do more stuff. the bodega is still important to both of them but it isn’t nearly as much a main setting for sonny’s adolescence as it is in canon.

on that note, since in my version the first thing that makes usnavi hold an instant vendetta against pete is catching pete tagging the store only a few weeks after losing his parents, where his feelings are still so intense and raw. the store hasn’t reopened and so the graffiti feels like someone else making a claim on the only thing he has left of his parents. in this version he’d be annoyed to catch someone tagging the store at most but much quicker to forgive and forget. so in a world where usnavi doesn’t lose his parents, usnavi also doesn’t hate graffiti pete.

 if we’re assuming that things did go roughly similar to the point of usnavi being in the club with vanessa on the night of the blackout, here’s the things that would change:

- sonny isn’t the one at the bodega, his parents are, and they’re together so usnavi doesn’t feel the same urgency to get back and check on things there when the power goes out. instead he finds vanessa and walks her home and by the time he’s back at the store, i think his mom would already be with abuela making sure she’s okay, and usnavi would focus on helping his dad make sure everything was safe and secure at the bodega

- he’s also probably still pretty drunk at this point, so there’s a chance that when everything at the store is secured he just goes straight to bed; it’s been a long night, and he’s tired, and he doesn’t have the trauma of past loss making him feel like he personally has to check every little thing himself. he trusts his parents to take care of abuela, it isn’t all on his shoulders. so they don’t have their moment together on the roof.

- whether the store gets looted in this version or not, i don’t think usnavi’s waking up at sunrise to deal with it, but even if he is then he gets up, helps his parents, is upset and annoyed but not in the same visceral, overwhelming way that he is in canon because he doesn’t have all those other long-term anxieties building up in him, he doesn’t have that pressure of his parents legacy tied up in the store when they’re still right there, he doesn’t have that conversation with vanessa where she’s hurt and betrayed that he left her in the blackout and didn’t check up on her.  (sidenote this may even mean that vanessa doesn’t move downtown, because if he isnt looking for a way to make things up to her before he leaves then he might not think to speak to dani about co-signing her apartment)

-  this means he probably doesn’t get overwhelmed and abandon cleanup to go visit abuela in the morning like he does in canon when we get Hundreds of Stories. he might not even be around, since he tells sonny in canon to get a generator and candles to the church and that’s probably an errand he’d do himself while his parents manned the store. this means he probably does not see abuela that one final time or have that one final meaningful conversation with her before she passes.

final sad note: in a version of events where usnavi never loses his parents, christmas is still his favourite time of year.

[yourcoffindoor]

Bulletproof Heart Pt.2

Pairing: Gerard Way x Reader

Prompt: Request from Anon- “ could you write one where the reader is a rock singer and they and mcr are on warped tour together, and they both lowkey like each other but think they’re both out of each other’s league, and find out that they’re both secretly into nerdy stuff + maybe getting together?

TW: Mentions of an abusive relationship.

AN: The plot thickens. Sorry for the delay in uploading <3

Enjoyyyy <3

That night after everyone had stumbled back to the bus in a tipsy stupor, you couldn't shake the thought of your encounter with Gerard from your brain. And what's more, you hated yourself for it. For awhile you tossed and turned, hoping the unwelcome feelings you had would fade to nothing so that you could fall asleep at last.

But your curiosity got the better of you, and there was only would person who could give you the answers you were looking for.

"Hey Gavin, are you still conscious?" you whispered from your bunk. You heard the rustle of sheets moving in response.

"Hmmm?" a low and sleepy sound of acknowledgement answered.

"I'm just wondering...what do you know about Gerard Way?"

As soon as the words left your lips, Gavin's curtains swung open with superhuman force.

"Y/N are you in love with Gerard Way?!" Gavin's voice was no longer tired, having morphed into a sharp and excited whisper. In addition to being the band's social butterfly, he always knew the gossip about everyone within a 20 mile radius.

"Christ, really Gavin? We only spoke for like fifteen minutes."

"So it was like a love at first sight situation?"

"You are so annoying, I swear to god."

"Do you want info or not?" he threatened.

You sighed. "Fine, yes I do."

Gavin cleared his throat as if preparing for a presentation. "OK, so everyone has something good to say about him, seems like a really genuine guy. I've heard he was in a long term relationship for ages, but its been broken off for awhile now. "

"Hmm," you murmured, trying to sound indifferent, "yeah he seems like a sweet guy."

"Yeah and every girl with a pulse seems to be after him. You got some competition out there." he teased. "But seriously, if you're interested you should go for it. You deserve to be happy, Y/N. It's been three years since...you know who."

Gavin didn't say his name, but he had said enough to bring on a wave of sad memories. "Thanks. I'm uh, feeling pretty tired, so... I'm just gonna get some sleep."

"G'night." Gavin said softly, as if aware he had brought out long buried and very unwelcome feelings.

You rolled over in your bunk, pulling your blankets up over your head, unwilling to dwell on the memories that had been drudged up by only a few words. Three years ago. That's when you finally had the strength to break it off with Alex.

You were a different person when you met him. It was your first relationship, and you were naive and forgiving, unable to see the dozens of red flags that should have made you run away from it all.

You had answered an ad that he had posted asking for potential band members for a punk band he was forming. It had been your dream to pursue music, and you responded right away, hoping you'd hit it off. You weren't expecting Alex to be so damn attractive, and when your audition was successful, it was only a matter of time before a relationship began to develop between you.

He was older than you, more experienced, and eager to take you under his wing where he could have the most control. You mistook his over-protectiveness as a sign of love, and he slowly cut you off from people outside of the band, leaving you isolated and dependent on him.

Eventually he would get angry if he saw you speak to any other man. He took your phone regularly so that he could look through it, questioning you about anything he didn't like. The fights you had were loud and ugly, your voices rising and crashing like cantankerous bursts of thunder. Eventually, they became violent.

You were stuck in a cycle of affection and fear, held there as if caught in a tide that would never bring you back to shores of sanity. But you did eventually find the strength to get out when your friend reached out to you, offering you a place to stay. You packed your bags that night and didn't look back.

Your band was not just a career for you, it was a symbol of healing, proof that you were able to overcome it all and strike out on your own. You rolled over in your bunk, and pushed the unwanted memories aside, reminding yourself of the promise you had made to be the best damn band on Warped tour. Nothing was going to change that now.

x x x 

Your first performance went by in a haze of adrenaline and sweat. The crowd was young and eager to see what you had to offer, and you were all to happy to give them something they'd remember for a long long time.

There were several people in the crowd who were fans already, proudly wearing your band's shirts and mouthing along to all of the lyrics. Others were slowly converted, headbanging enthusiastically by the end of your set. When the band's final song was met with deafening hoots and cheers, you'd felt like you'd accomplished your mission.

"We fucking killed it!" Gavin declared as he slumped in the nearest chair, exhausted.

"The crowd was good, huh?" you beamed as you wiped the sweat from your face, still breathless from your onstage antics. "Let's hope they're all like this."

"Can't get any worse than our first show ever, remember?" Liz laughed as she recalled the groups early days. "Never had so much beer pelted at me in my life."

People milled about as you and your band mates caught your breath. A few musicians from other bands popped in to say hi and let you know that they enjoyed your performance.

"Hey you actually made it!" Gavin jumped up from his chair as he noticed a new face entering the backstage area. "Guys did you meet Frank last night? From My Chemical Romance?" A man with wide hazel eyes gave a quick wave from the the entryway.

"This guy was goin on and on about how you guys were the best new band on warped tour. Had to see if he was just full of shit."

"He always starts bragging when he's drunk." you rolled your eyes.

"Well, I'm glad he did. You guys put on a pretty kick-ass show. Plus Gerard really wanted to check it out."

Your heartbeat, which had only just settled from jumping around on stage, began to speed up again.

"Gerard?"you asked softly, caught off guard by the mention of his name.  You didn't see the familiar black haired boy near frank. You only saw Gavin attempting to give you a discreet wink, which you returned with a harsh glare.

"Yeah actually we were all there. Mikey and Ray had to run to another show. Don't know where Gee disappeared to though," Frank craned his head, looking around at the hustle and bustle that was happening permanently everywhere on Warped tour. "Ah, there he is. Gerard!"

You saw Gerard, surrounded by a small circle of fans, each holding something they wanted him to sign. You felt a strange pang when you noticed they were all pretty girls, and Gavin's words from last night came back to haunt you. You got some competition out there. You struggled to identify just what emotion was suddenly eating away at you--were you really jealous? Or was it the realization that even if you decided to make a move, it was probably hopeless?

Gerard nodded at Frank. "Be there in a sec!" he shouted, continuing to sign autographs until he had gotten through everyone.

Frank spoke with your band mates, but you were too distracted by the knowledge that Gerard had watched you perform to be sociable. You were anxious as to what his opinion would be, but tried to push it out of your thoughts.

You watched nervously as Gerard spoke to Frank and Gavin, noticing that he would glance over at you every so often. When your eyes finally met he gave you a nod and a warm smile. You gave yourself an internal pep talk to try and stay calm. You can just be friends, you don't need to do anything except be friendly. For the love of god, act normal.

Eventually he made his way over to you,offering another soft and lopsided smile,but his time it almost seemed as if he was shy. "Great show. From one lead singer to another, your band has a fucking killer sound."

You thanked him, grinning like an idiot while cautionary alarm bells went off in your head.

"I might be a bit biased though, because of the shirt your wearing."

You looked down, having forgotten what you threw on that morning. It was one of your favorite shirts,  a short sleeved tee with the X-Men symbol emblazoned on the front. You'd had it for years, as evidenced by the smattering of small holes peeking through the bottom edge. Oh no, you thought, he likes comics too?

"You're a fan?" you asked coolly, a stark contrast to the giddy panic that was building up inside you.

"Yes! I actually wanted to make comics before My Chem was a thing." He spoke animatedly, his round hazel eyes widening even further. "But life had other plans. Not that I'm complaining."

That familiar heat rose in your cheeks. This conversation was dangerous, and you were trying desperately to fight the feeling that this man was something close to perfect.

The world around the two of you became an insignificant blur as you both discussed comics at length, and you hung on every word, taking turns revealing how you first discovered them and sharing your favorites. He even recommended a few titles that you had never heard of. His demeanor was passionate and lively, entirely different from the sullen boy you met the night before.

"I uh, I'm actually working on a comic at the moment," he began, tucking a strand of hair behind his ear, suddenly bashful, "If you're interested you should stop by the bus sometime--"

Gerard's eyes focused on something just behind you, and you felt a sudden tap on your shoulder. You turned and felt your stomach drop to a sickening low. There, standing next to the drunk who was hitting on you last night, was your ex-boyfriend Alex.

"What are the odds!" he smiled at you, blank looking smug beside him. You found yourself at a loss for words.

"What...what are you doing here?"

He scoffed. "Ouch Y/N, is that anyway to say hello? I'm here for the same reason you are." He turned his attention to Gerard. "I'm Alex. Y/N and I used to have a band together back in the day. Well, a bit more than that actually." He smirked at you, instantly transforming any butterflies you had felt while talking to Gerard into pure revulsion.

This was your worst case scenario, and it was one you had never even considered to be possible. Seeing his face again made you freeze up, and you were at a loss for words. You looked up at Gerard through your eyelashes, wondering if the dark and overwhelming swirl of emotion inside you was showing on your face. His brows were furrowed ever so slightly as if he could sense that something wasn't quite right.

"Nice to meet you," he replied curtly before turning his attention back to you. I'll uh, let you catch up. I'll just be over there with Frank...if you need anything."

You merely nodded, too caught up in your feelings to respond properly. "I'll catch you later then."

Alex saw this opportunity as a chance to reach for an embrace, but you stepped back and out of reach.

"Just what the hell are you doing?"

"What are you implying? I'm just dropping in to say hello before Midnite Heist performs later. I'm their new drummer after all. I can't even do that?"

"No," you said, struggling to maintain a low voice, "You can't. I told you I never wanted to see you again. We may be on the same tour, but that doesn't mean you can approach me. Don't try it again."

He laughed, clearly embarrassed to be spoken too like that in front of his band mate. "If you're trying to get with that Way guy, don't bother. You're punching way above your weight with that one."

You took a moment to steel yourself, and decided to walk away rather than let thing turn into a scene. Before you turned to leave, you offered one final warning.

"I haven't forgotten what you did to me. Speak to me again and you'll regret it."

You walked off, hearing mocking 'Ooooh's from Alex and Brent as you left. You saw heads turning in your direction as you stormed away towards the bus, including Gerard's, but you couldn't be bothered by that now- not when you were struggling to keep it together.

Fuck Fuck Fuck your internal monologue looped on a bitter repeat. This was going to be the longest tour of your life.

[border-spam]

Leech Lord AU - Char Breakdown

Seifa A’rosk / Seifa Ur-Machina / Saint of the God King’s Mechanica

Bless u @nikyri-art​ and @lazulizard​ for the art! List of character traits and world-building facets for this character within my story. The Leech Lord Au is the one all other twins content I’ve written is set in.

Troy’s is HERE Tyreen’s is HERE

Note, ye asked and ye received. Literally my first OC ever, no clue what I’m doing, constructive feedback is 100% welcome.

Physical Details:

Right handed.

Very short, 4′11″, and rarely seen out of heeled boots.

5 years older than the twins, in her mid twenties when she came across the scabby looking rat who introduced herself as Tyreen.

Long auburn hair she usually wears in waves.

Right side shave, warm blue eyes, septum/eyebrow/labret facial piercings

Average bodyweight, hourglass shape.

Saint sigil tattoo between her shoulderblades.

Couple of small scars across torso, stab wound near navel, nicks across left ribs. 

Visible facial scar is paper thin and streaks across her right brow into her hairline. Tells everyone this was from a knife fight, but was actually from an echodevice she was trying to scavenge components from blowing in her face a decade ago. Figures she might as well try and get some intimidation points out of it.

Relaxed punk aesthetic she carries into her engineering uniform.

Usually covered in homemade jewelry.

Backstory:

Sei is a migrant junker/mechanic, and has been running a solo career as one since her late teens.

She has no memory of family, and doesn't care in the slightest. Figures she was probably sold into child labor before she was old enough to remember who they were. Loses no sleep over this and rarely gives it any thought.

Grew up traveling with her "Boss" (head of the scavenging ring who managed herself and the other skinny little kids she was raised with) between different rim planets including Pandora, scrapping and repairing tech while scavenging the thousands of ship husks dumped during the corporate wars.

Spent her formative years constantly surrounded by other children and teens who helped each other get each other through what should have been a relatively lonely existence, and developed a close family bond with many.

Retained contact with a lot of them in adulthood. They operate a network of mechanics and engineers across the system, a few of which come to work within the COV Mechanica when they realise she can offer safety.

Spent her childhood and teens learning the art of the deal from her boss, accompanying him on trade runs, market dealings, debt collections, anything and everything he figured would help her in the long term. Learned everything she could while accompanying him as a kid, like a filthy little sponge in too-big overalls and a runny nose.

Engineering and mech skills have been honed from years of pulling apart and crawling into junked ships, repairing and reselling on components for profit.

At 19, she had saved enough to purchase a shitty little rehashed transport ship from her Boss, and set out to start her own trade. They've kept in touch and are on friendly grounds. Still calls him Boss. Never actually learned his name, it didn’t matter.

Seifa spends years migrating between outer planets, building a reputation with her bartering and trade skills. Playing idiot traders like instruments, flirting her way into high profit deals, and starting bar fights. She doesn’t take part in them mind you, she’s a lady. She just starts them. 

It’s an easy way to get a group of “eager investors” to weed out the lesser competition, and leave you able to playfully manipulate yourself into the good graces of someone who’s too horny and pumped up on the hormonal rush of the fight to realise that they are the mark.

Moves to the next planet once she's outstayed her welcome, but always makes more friends than enemies.

At 25, finds a terrified and not remotely intimidating girl in a Pandoran junkyard, who pulls a gun on her. Tyreen tries to mug her with a shitty SMG that's clearly out of ammo, has a jammed trigger, and gets laughed at in response. Gets called a weird, stupid kid. Gets interrogated about how she is too old to be on Pandora and still alive if this is how clueless she is, so what’s going on? 

Ty breaks down into tears and begs to please, please get her some medicine. Her "Brother is so sick” and he's “all she has now”, and they've “no money, no supplies. It wasn’t meant to go like this, it shouldn’t have gone like this but they didn’t know what it would be like.." and in a rare moment of empathy likely routed in years of being around kids this stupid, and clueless, and dumb ... Seifa helps.

Traits: ✓ Positive x Negative:

✓ Confident, both in her appearance and knowledge.

Sei is a jack of all trades, master of none. Her range of knowledge is broad and useful, and her confidence stems both from her well maintained physical appearance, and general competency in most situations where she needs to be.

✓  Socially skilled, fast learner, adaptable. 

She’s been learning on her feet as long as she can remember, and is highly socially skilled, though a lot of her “nice” interactions can be a veneer. She holds people at arms length without them realising she’s not being as open and friendly as she appears.

✓  Self sufficient, reliable, trustworthy.

An adult lifetime of needing to rely solely on herself has left her highly sufficient, and very dependable. Seifa is the kind of person you call when you need something done, and don’t need to ask questions about how she gets you your results. You’ll get what you need.. just don’t hassle her about how she achieved it. You’ll be told to piss off, very clearly.

✓  Excellent negotiator, skilled in controlling conversations and manipulating others from years of trading for a living.

Seifa has been learning how to argue, shift conversations towards her own goals, and turn competitors on each other since she was barely able to carry a wrench. She’s an excellent dealer, and can drop into one of her many characters instantly when they’d help shift a contract towards her gain. Floozy giggling newcomer? Got it. Clueless naive big spender? No problem. Trade baroness about to crush your knuckles? Game on.

It’s something the twin strays she rescues are very interested in learning from her.

✓  Naturally friendly, and deeply caring for those she bonds with.

Sei is generally easy to get on with, between her decent set of social skills and ability to quickly read people, she comes across as quite friendly and overall pleasant to most people. She’s very slow to become genuine around others or show her caring side, an understandable side effect of the kind of life she’s lived, but her close friends are very close, and see her as one for life.

✓  Lawful Neutral.

 Morals are decent ( for a Pandoran) , and is always willing to help someone if it's not too much hassle or won’t put her out. Like the majority of people living on this rock however, she won’t put strangers before her own safety or wellbeing.

x  Very vain.

Sei will sacrifice functionality for style in the Mechanicum without a second thought, and will become frustrated and snappy if unhappy with her appearance and forced into social situations. She’s had a lifetime of curating her looks and using them as a tool, and hates being seen “out of character”.

x Self focused. 

She won’t risk harm physically or to her reputation for someone she has no stake in. Fact of life on Pandora is that people who do that don't tend to live very long, and she’s highly aware of that. Close friends and children are about it when it comes to who she’d take a risk for, and bandits slaughtering each other or ransacking towns is unlikely to be something she’d be very phased by. It’s not that she doesn’t care, she just doesn’t allow herself to.

x Irritable, easily brought to frustration or insulted. Holds grudges badly.

Seifa manages her collected and cool outer demeanor by pushing it over her emotional state. It’s a defense mechanism she’s learned from a lifetime of being in situations where emotion = weakness. Her high personal opinion of herself and pride in her skill means she takes to being insulted very easily. A subordinate who doesn’t show her respect won’t stay in her department long, and an equal who treats her like an underling? She will Never. Let. It. Go.

x Snappy and unpleasant when stressed or overworked, unable to handle emotion based arguments.

Seifa’s response to stress or frustration is to become overwhelmingly in control of the situation, and fiercely logical. Her social niceness evaporates and she defaults to the simple level of “Get this shit done NOW, and don’t question me” when it comes to dolling out required tasks. This is a bad thing to couple with arrogance. She is also completely incapable of arguing with someone who uses emotion instead of logic as their drive, and so while she is able to communicate with Troy very well even in heated times as they both default to logic, arguments between herself and Tyreen can become vicious, as neither is capable of expressing themselves in the other’s language when frustrated.

x Loyalty to close friends can overpower her better judgement in situations.

She’s completely aware of the hypocrisy of this weakness considering the front she likes to portray, being cold and unaffected by problems, but has never been able to stop herself from making this same mistake. Over and over.

x Noticeably arrogant, no respect for the chain of command.

Relying on her gut for survival through her life left her with an inflated sense of worth for her own opinion, and she finds it very hard to really convince herself that others may be the better option, or have more value than her own. This means she can also easily forget her place if she thinks a superior is in the wrong. Has earned her a stab to the abdomen and a broken wrist in the past. Both healed, both scarred. Her arrogance towards the twins, being that they are younger and far less experienced than her in general life, has caused multiple confrontation. She know’s it’s a problem, and she’s trying to get better. She really is.

Likes:

Money.

Personal freedoms.

Self reliance.

Feeling admired and appreciated.

Close companionships with friends who see her as an equal.

Her advice being heeded.

Growing plants.

Tinkering with smalltime tech and gadgets.

The safety of the COV meaning she can finally settle in one place.

Respect.

Being wanted, physically and emotionally.

Tenderness.

Gaming, watching movies, appreciating art. 

Crafting jewelry from scrap

Having her gentle, caring nature be valued.

Men.

Dislikes:

Bullshit. Can't stand people who don't communicate logically.

Being spoken down to.

Her appearance being mocked or intelligence belittled.

Social sycophancy.

Being lied to, having her trust broken when she so rarely gives it.

Unfairness, aimed at her or those she feels protective over ( friends, underlings )

Pointless violence.

Risk taking.

Most things considered *edible* on Pandora.

Men. -

Asks are Open!

[the-odinson]

Thor 🗲 Intro

“Fortunately, I am mighty...”

OOC PORTION —

NAME: Danny

PRONOUNS: he/him

AGE: 23

TIMEZONE: GMT +1

TRIGGERS: None

IC PORTION; BASICS —

CHARACTER NAME: Thor Odinson

FACECLAIM: Chris Hemsworth

AFFILIATIONS: The Avengers

AGE: 1500s/appears mid 30s

SPECIES: Alien (Asgardian)

IDENTITY: Public

DOES YOUR CHARACTER LIVE IN THE MOUSEHOLE? IF SO, WHAT ARE THEIR DUTIES? Yes, but he doesn’t particularly like it there. He doesn’t feel the effects of the cold, but Thor has never liked being confined so prefers to get outside as much as possible. Thor has decided to take on the role of a hunter/gatherer. The vast forests of Europe aren’t too dissimilar to the Asgardian wilderness and, while the beasts aren’t as ferocious as back home, what’s a king to do if not revel in the hunt? When needed he will also help with aid work: he can cover great distances with ease and carrying heavy loads is hardly a problem for him.

DESCRIBE SIX TRAITS (3 positive, 3 negative) YOUR CHARACTER HAS AND HOW THESE AFFECT THEM:

Dependable: A man of his word, Thor is trustworthy and reliable; an asset in any team and to anyone who has a favour to ask. Endearing: Those who truly get to know Thor speak of him with admiration; his warm smile and welcoming personality don’t come to all, but if he lets his guard down you’re guaranteed a friend with whom you feel truly comfortable. Benevolent: Thor (usually) means well and (usually) tries to be kind to anyone he encounters. His exterior may come across as brash but there’s no malice involved, often just a difference in culture and upbringing. Obstinate: While being headstrong may not always be a negative thing, Thor hates to admit he’s wrong and has a tendency to steamroll down a chosen path rarely reassessing whether the choices he made were the right ones or simply the first ones. Distrusting: Thor enjoys being social but mainly around those he’s close to. He can appear a little hostile to strangers: while he wants to believe in the good in people, he’s been around long enough and seen a lot of the universe to know of the potential darkness inside them too. Reckless: Thor often acts on impulse and charges into situations unprepared. This can lead to serious damage caused to both himself and those around him.

POWERS AND/OR ABILITIES: Super strength: Son of Odin and King of Asgard, Thor is physically the strongest of all Asgardians, with feats including being able to go one-on-one with the Hulk and other powerful entities. Flight: Thor’s magical axe Stormbreaker grants him the ability to fly. Electricity Manipulation: Thor is capable of generating electrical energy within his body and can expel it in the form of lightning bolts. Using Stormbreaker makes the energy generation and expulsion much more powerful and efficient. Weather Control: Similarly, either with or without Stormbreaker (although with Stormbreaker is easier), Thor can control the sky and create storms. Durability: His Asgardian physiology grants much more durability than a human one, able to shrug off energy blasts and recover from injury much quicker. Thor can also survive in space and alien atmospheres. Allspeak: Also called the All-Tongue, Asgardians speak a magic-based language, granting the ability to understand and be understood in all the languages of the Nine Realms. Bifrost: Stormbreaker also gifts Thor the power to summon the Bifrost, the Rainbow Bridge connecting all realms, allowing intergalactic travel between worlds in a matter of moments.

WEAKNESSES: There aren’t many things on Earth that could pose a threat to Thor, so it’s hard to pinpoint any specific weaknesses. Perhaps for someone like Thor, the word god comes up so often that he sometimes forgets it’s not true: he is mortal and, while far more durable than a human, he can get injured and he can get killed, a fact that he often brushes to the side when charging into battle. However he has become far more self-aware after losing an eye (and almost his life) to Hela.

IC PORTION; DETAILS —

WHAT BROUGHT YOUR CHARACTER TO SOKOVIA?

Sokovia is where the majority of Thor’s allies are, and he needs their help. His world gone, his people stranded on the nearest hospitable realm in need of a home; Thor knew of a place where the Asgardians could blend in and live peaceful lives. The problem is, however, it seems Earth is not quite at peace right now. When he couldn’t track down the Avengers in New York, he followed the trail to Novi Grad. His priorities are conflicting: while he came back to Earth to ask the Avengers’ help in establishing a new Asgard on this planet, he feels he should stay to try and help his friends however he can in aiding the Nomad’s cause.

DID THEY SIGN THE ACCORDS? WHY OR WHY NOT?

No - the whole Accords situation is mostly unbeknownst to Thor due to being offworld at the time of signing. From what he can gather, it isn’t something that would appeal to him. He feels the affairs of humans are mostly petty ones and, despite his growing acclimatisation to Earth and its customs, he doesn’t understand why humans have to be so divided about, well, pretty much everything.

PROVIDE 3-5 HEADCANONS RELATED TO YOUR CHARACTER: 1. Although Thor is an alien, he has spent enough time on this planet (in both modern and ancient times) for the culture shock to lessen so that now Earth to Thor is more comparable to a human travelling to a different country - he acknowledges that the differences are neither better nor worse and he chooses to respect them. He knows he will make mistakes and appear strange, but sees that now as an opportunity for personal growth. 2. One thing he doubts he will ever understand however, is the human version of ‘entertainment’. Thor cannot stand movies. On Asgard, they would entertain themselves by slaying fearsome monsters or engaging in a friendly drunken brawl, the more broken furniture the better! But on Earth they amuse themselves by… sitting down and staring at a screen for hours on end. While both Asgard and Earth had/have magnificent technology, it’s clear they used it very differently.

3. Since returning to Earth, Thor has become intrigued in the Norse tales of himself and his people from over a thousand years ago and their alleged feats. He finds it highly amusing how inaccurate the stories are, but it has led to a fascination of human mythology and the various pantheons across history and the world. He wonders if he will ever meet any other of these so-called gods.

4. While a human brain only has capacity for almost a century’s worth of memories, an Asgardian brain is built for a few millennia’s worth. Therefore Thor has a much more acute long-term memory than his human companions, although occasionally his short-term memory leaves something to be desired, especially after several pints of mead.

WANTED CHARACTER CONNECTIONS: 

Loki: His brother and the person he loves (and hates) most in the cosmos. I know a thing or two about brotherly love (I’ve been experiencing it for 23 years) so would love to write for Thor with his undeniably most personal connection. Wonder Woman: Both ancient, both ‘gods’ and both so very far from home. Despite their different allegiances I think it would be great to have Thor bond with perhaps the one person around here who may truly understand him. Superman: If anything they both have fabulous red capes. They are quite similar power-wise, although I know Superman is stronger but Thor definitely wouldn’t want to admit that. It could lead to some healthy (or unhealthy?) competition between the two, especially seeing as Thor isn’t too fond of the Justice League. Captain America & Iron Man: The two splintered team leaders. Thor respects them both (Tony a little less, perhaps…) and, since he doesn’t really understand the extent of the accords, would like to hear their sides of the story and what has happened since the Ultron incident. Bruce Banner: Thor has fought with the Hulk a couple of times but feels this has brought the two closer, learning more about how Bruce ticks and now he feels there’s a protective bond between the pair. I think the interactions they have could bring out the comedic style of writing which I love!

POTENTIAL CHARACTER ARCS: In the previous paragraph I said I like writing comedic characters (of which Thor fits the bill) but I also want to explore the deeper aspects of his personality such as the emotional pain of losing his parents, his childhood friends and his home. This could manifest in him not wanting to form bonds with others in the Mousehole at first because he’s lost so many people: why would he want to get close with anyone else only to lose them again? Perhaps a dramatic fallout with someone from a different team could lead to serious consequences for him or the team as a whole.

The reason I chose for placing Thor in Sokovia is that he’s seeking a location for New Asgard: maybe with all its emigrating population and empty buildings Sokovia could be the perfect location… I’m not sure how it would work in the group, but maybe Thor could eventually bring the Asgardians here, both to settle and to help with the restoration of the country.

CHARACTER BIO —

You know the story. An Asgardian prince, lacking in humility and exiled to Earth in order to learn what it means to be worthy. A classic tale, but at its heart, a tale of loss, and a tale of what it means to truly be human: even if you’re not. Thor has lived for well over a millenia, but only in the last decade has his life really begun. From landing on Earth a long time after people stopped worshipping him, he slowly began to understand the importance of relationships; from forming close bonds with the Avengers (and wary acquaintances with the Justice League and X-Men), to experiencing true love for the very first time. All his life Thor had assumed that humans were lesser beings, so why then did he feel he was learning so much more from them than he had ever learned from his own kind? 

After experiencing the death of his mother, then later on his father and three close childhood friends, Thor was at breaking point when his home realm of Asgard was obliterated during Ragnarök by the fire demon Surtur. With the title of King thrust upon him, Thor decided his duty to his people had to consume him before his emotions did. Pursuing the quest of a new home, he led them to Nidavellir, the homeworld of the dwarfs; unsurpassable smiths and mechanics with the power to forge almost anything the mind can dream of, ruled over by their King, Eitri. Eons ago, Eitri had forged the legendary hammer Mjölnir (destroyed by Hela) at Odin’s request, now he oversaw the creation of the glorious axe Stormbreaker when asked by Thor, capable of summoning the rainbow bridge despite its apparent destruction on Asgard. Armed with his new tool and a promise to the Asgardians of a brighter future, Thor set out alone across the stars, heading to Midgard to find his old allies the Avengers. He’d helped the humans many times before, hopefully they’ll be able to help him and his race this time. 

It took Thor losing everything to appreciate what he has. As he enters the next phase of his life in Sokovia, without family or a home, he is truly the definition of a nomad.

[sariasprincy-writes]

Hollow Point - Epilogue

One // Two // Three // Four // Five // Six // Seven // Eight // Nine // Ten // Eleven // Twelve // Thirteen // Fourteen // Fifteen // Sixteen // Seventeen // Eighteen // Nineteen // Twenty // Twenty-One // Twenty-Two // Twenty-Three // Twenty-Four // Twenty-Five // Twenty-Six // Twenty-Seven // Twenty-Eight // Twenty-Nine // Thirty // Thirty-One // Thirty-Two // Thirty-Three // Thirty-Four // Thirty-Five // Thirty-Six //  - Epilogue Part I (here) 

Epilogue Phantom Pain

Berlin, Germany

It was raining again. Water fell from the sky, pelting the ground and speckling the glass of the store fronts lining the sidewalks. Inside a little coffeehouse a few blocks from the city center, Sakura sipped her mocha as she watched the sky attempt to drown the earth beneath it.

The little shop wasn’t terribly large. Just big enough for a few tables. She sat by herself while the rest of the room was occuied by a group of young, high school-aged locals. They chatted animatedly in rapid German; their laughter only broken up by the tinkling of the bell above the front door.

Sakura didn’t look up as the chair across from her was pulled back before a man in a raincoat sat down. Kakashi pushed his hood back before he let out a relieved sigh, obviously happy to be out of the rain. He ordered a plain Americano from the waitress and waited to speak until she brought it out to him in a large porcelain coffee mug similar to Sakura’s.

“How did your meeting with your contact go?” Kakashi asked before he taste-tested his drink.

“As well as could be expected,” she replied. When he shot her a curious look, she explained with a faint glare. “He was more interested into getting into my pants then talking actual business.”

“Which is why you choose to work with women,” Kakashi provided.

Sakura tipped her head. “Still, he proved to be of some use. As it turns out he knows of someone who wants to begin moving product into New York.”

“Oh?”

“Her name is Karin. She’s a Russian dealer out of Moscow. She smart and crafty, but she’s been busy fighting other dealers within the country to branch out.”

Kakashi’s brow arched in surprise. “You’ve been watching her a while then.”

“Almost a year,” she nodded.

“She shows promise then.”

Sakura hummed her agreement as she drank from her now-lukewarm mug. “I’m not ready to introduce myself yet though. She has some in-house cleaning to do before she can consider branching out. Until then, I’ll keep watch from a distance. Ino thinks Karin would help Tenten keep up with her orders.”

“That would ease the flow of product out of Cairo too,” Kakashi said.

Sakura nodded again, her gaze distant as her mind worked through the ins and outs of her business. There had been some Egyptian Federal Agents poking around her eastern port lately. They were moving so much product it was beginning to draw the eyes of the government; something she needed to shut down soon.

“Is your shoulder bothering you again?” Kakashi asked abruptly.

Confused, Sakura realized she had been massaging her shoulder through her sweatshirt where Izuna had shot her nine months ago. It ached on cool days or when she sat still for too long. And when she allowed her mind to wander…

She dropped her hand. “It’s fine.”

Kakashi obviously wasn’t convinced, but she continued before he could press her. “Any word on Kisame?”

The ex-Marine observed her for a long moment before he finally shook his head. Sakura didn’t know if she was more relieved or disappointed. Kakashi had spent the last few months bouncing between Egypt and Israel, mostly keeping an eye on Temari’s operations and checking in with the latest news in Tel Aviv. If there was any news on Kisame, Kakashi would have heard.

“Temari hasn’t seen or heard anything from him since he arrived in Cairo nine months ago,” Kisame said. “He likely scouted out what became of Akatsuki in Egypt before he returned to Israel. He’s been underground since then.”

“Hopefully he got another assignment,” she murmured, none too hopeful. Sakura didn’t doubt Kisame still had it out for her. Especially since their last meeting had ended on less than friendly terms.

“Speaking of another assignment, you’re heading back to New York almost two weeks earlier than you planned,” Kakashi said, absently stirring his coffee. “What’re you working on?”

“Nothing in particular. Tenten is looking to recruit more men. Her influence is spreading faster than either of us anticipated.”

“Tenten has the money and resources to handle that on her own,” he said in confusion.

“Yes, but I want to be there to remind her who provided her all her new territory,” Sakura said, just a hint of sharpness entering her tone. “Tenten and I get along just fine, but she plays by her own rules. I don’t want her forgetting this is my game.”

Kakashi considered that with a single side-nod, as if to say he agreed with her reasoning.

Sakura fell quiet after that, her mind running through the errands and projects that needed her attention when she returned to the States. She needed to meet with Tenten, check in on Ino, and Sakura tended to have this habit of dropping by Tobirama’s. Purely to get an update on his numbers, or so she told herself.

“What time does your flight leave?” Kakashi asked.

Sakura checked her watch. “Four hours from now.”

“Do you want me to join you or do you need me to check in on Temari again?”

Whatever Sakura was about to say fell forgotten as she heard Itachi laugh somewhere behind her. Abruptly she jerked her head to the sound, her heart skipping a beat in her chest. Only for her gaze to land upon another man. He was a young American, about Itachi’s age with a deep laugh like he used to have.

Not for the first time, Sakura forced herself to remember Itachi was gone, he’s dead. She had stood on the hill in Arlington nearly nine months ago as they lowered his casket into the ground. His entire family lined the front row of mourners, including Shisui and someone Sakura recognized from a photo on the mantle above Itachi’s fireplace: Sasuke, his younger brother.

Then they had stamped the newly dug earth with a name plate. Sakura had only visited it once.

Still, Itachi haunted her. She heard his voice in crowded places and felt his touch in her dreams. She wondered when she would ever stop thinking about him.

“Sakura?”

At the call of her name, she turned her gaze back to Kakashi. There was an expectant look on his face that reminded her he was waiting for an answer.

“Check in on Temari,” Sakura finally replied. “If the police aren’t poking around again, come join me in New York.”

With that decided, they finished their coffee and stood to leave. Under the awning, Kakashi told her he’d keep in touch and to update him on the situation in New York. She nodded her assent and waited until he was out of sight before she dared glance back at the coffeehouse.

A dull ache rose in her chest, but she inhaled and exhaled quickly, pushing the feeling away as she turned her back on the café. She had a plane to catch.

xx

Queens, New York, United States of America

As soon as she landed, Sakura made her way to Tobirama’s mansion. It was late when she arrived. The stars were already out and a bright, full moon illuminated the sky even against the polluting city lights.

As usual, the guard let her pass. She drove up the circle drive and parked out front. Immediately a staff member greeted her and accepted her car keys to park her vehicle in the garage. The butler answered the door before she had even started ascending the entrance stairs. In the doorway, he accepted her coat without anything more than a polite ‘good evening’.

Tobirama greeted her at the bottom of the stairs. His brow arched curiously. “You’re here early.” Then he glanced at the expensive watch on his wrist. “Nearly two weeks early.”

She cocked her head, a smirk lingering in the corner of her mouth. “Should I come back later?”

His gaze lingered on her a moment. Then the corner of his lips flickered up into a smirk before he grabbed her and roughly sealed his mouth over hers. They stumbled to the bedroom, bumping pictures on the wall and tripping over discarded clothes until Tobirama hoisted her onto his hips. Her legs wrapped around his waist before her back hit the wall just inside the bedroom door.

A sound between a gasp and a moan ripped out of her throat as he lined himself up. Then he settled deep inside her, allowing gravity to do its job as his fingers bruised her thighs. Sakura wasn’t even sure if he had closed the door behind them, but she couldn’t care less as he started a hard, fast rhythm. Her head fell back against the wall as he buried himself into a particularly sensitive spot, her breathy moan turning into something sharper as his teeth bit into the soft skin of her neck.

Then Sakura retaliated. Her fingers tangled into his hair, jerking his head back before she crushed her mouth to his. She wasn’t sure if she had missed him, but she was certain she missed this, and she tightened her legs around his waist to pull him closer.

Their battle lasted until climax. Sakura came with an unmuffled cry before Tobirama carried her to the bed. He finished inside her before he rolled off to rest on the bed beside her. Sakura didn’t move until her breath evened out and the sweat on her skin began to make her feel cold and sticky. Without a word, she pushed herself to her feet before she made her way to the joined bathroom.

Inside, Sakura took a quick shower and wrapped herself up in one of the plush towels on the rack before she paused in front the mirror. Steam clung to the surface and she wiped it away with her hand, only pausing when she caught sight of the ugly, circular scar on her shoulder just below her collarbone. It had healed well after the surgery and would fade more with time, but it was a stark reminder of what had happened that day.

Sakura turned away before the memories could surface. She rubbed some lotion onto her legs and ran a brush through her hair before returning to the bedroom.

Her bag had appeared in the hall just outside the door and she brought it inside before dug out her computer bag. Tobirama was still in bed, his own laptop open in his lap.

“How was Cairo?” Tobirama asked.

He didn’t look up at her as she settled on the far side of the bed, one leg bent at the knee in front of her while the other hung off the side of the mattress.

“Boring,” Sakura replied as she booted up her system. “Temari has a pretty good handle on everything happening over there.”

Tobirama side-eyed her. “So, what did you do for the last month?”

“Hung out at the beach. Drank frilly drinks.”

“You’re not the kind to drink frilly drinks,” Tobirama said flatly.

Sakura couldn’t resist her smile. The man was right about that. “I went to Germany.”

Just as she expected, he blinked in confusion. “What the fuck is in Germany?”

“A contact,” she replied, unfazed by his language. “You remember how I said I might be able to get a line into Russia? There’s someone in Moscow that might be willing to start trading into New York.”

He nodded slowly. “Okay, but why meet in Germany?”

“Because that’s where he lived. I don’t fucking know. We just did,” she said, attitude creeping into her voice.

Tobirama was hardly put off by her tone. He didn’t look up from his computer as he asked, “So now what?”

“Now we wait to see if this new dealer contacts me,” she shrugged, her eyes turning down to her computer as her finance software loaded up. “It might take a little while, but I think I have what she wants.”

On the other side of the bed, Tobirama cocked his head. “Which is what?”

“Guns, money, power. Exactly what every other woman wants.”

He shot her an odd look as if to say he doubted that was what every woman wanted, but Sakura ignored him. Instead, she turned down to her work, double checking her accounts and her gun stores.

She was still balancing her finances when her phone went off a little while later. She picked up her phone absentmindedly, saving her work before she glanced at the caller ID. Instantly, she froze. The number was unsaved in her contacts, but she knew who was on the other end.

Orochimaru.

Closing her computer, Sakura stood from the bed. She picked up the call, but didn’t speak into the receiver as she grabbed the first article of clothing she found off the floor. It was Tobirama’s shirt. Quickly she slipped it on over her head before she left the room, closing the door behind her.

In the hall, a maid passed by. She nodded respectfully at Sakura before she quickly retreated down the other end to give her privacy. Sakura hardly even glanced in her direction. The staff were already used to seeing her half-naked, if not fully, by now.

As soon as Sakura was sure she was alone, she held the phone to her ear. “What?”

“Well isn’t that an unpleasant greeting. Shall we try again?” Orochimaru replied cheerfully. When Sakura remained silent, he huffed. “Fine, be that way. I believe you know why I’m calling.”

“You want to collect my debt.”

“Smart and beautiful,” he chuckled.

Sakura resisted the urge to growl. “What do you want?”

“And straight to the point,” he complained. “Very well. There is a man named Inuzuka Kiba. He’s a drug runner that I want taken care of. He’s mostly a ghost, but he commonly does his business in-”

“Moscow,” she finished.

She heard Orochimaru’s surprise through the phone. “You know him?”

“I know of him,” she said vaguely. “Why do you want him gone?”

“Oh darling,” he chuckled too fondly. “When I cleaned up your mess in New Jersey, did I ask any questions?”

A glare settled across her expression, but she forced it away with a sigh. As much as she hated Orochimaru, he had a point. And taking care of Kiba might actually earn her a favor in Russia.

“Consider it done,” she eventually said.

“Excellent.”

Orochimaru hung up then, but Sakura didn’t immediately return to the bedroom as she weighed her options. She hadn’t exactly been planning on moving into Russia so soon, but with Orochimaru’s orders, she had no choice.

After another minute, Sakura finally returned to the bedroom. Tobirama was still sitting where she had left him, computer on his lap. He glanced up at her briefly when she paused beside the bed, her phone still spinning slowly in her hand as she thought.

“What is it?” he asked.

Blinking her thoughts away, Sakura tossed her phone down onto the bed. “Remember how I wanted to go to Russia?”

“Yeah.”

“Turns out we’re going earlier than I planned.”

Tobirama arched his brow in surprise. “When?”

“Next week.”

Xx

Moscow, Russia

Music filled the ballroom. It drifted from the orchestra down below and rose up into the high ceiling. Men and women were dressed in expensive evening attire with glasses of champagne and whiskey in their hands provided by passing servers.

From the second floor, Sakura stood shadowed on a balcony overlooking the elegant party. The faint murmur of conversation reached her ears, but from her distance she couldn’t make out their words. Especially not when they were laced with such heavy Russian accents.

Like a hawk hunting her prey, Sakura watched the party-goers mingle with a calculating gaze, her eyes sharpened with black eyeliner. The people below looked like business men and women, and perhaps most of them were, but her sights were set on one.

Karin.

The beautiful woman stood out in her sparkling, silver dress. The material brushed her ankles, but it hugged her bust and curvy waist, the bits of crystal in her dress sparkling against the giant chandelier overhead. Her red hair spilled over her shoulder in silky curls, her bangs framing her youthful face. She was only a few years older than Sakura, but even she had to admit Karin was doing well in the Russian Underground. Especially now that Kiba was out of the picture.

“Is she ready?” a voice asked.

Sakura didn’t turn her gaze away from Karin as Tobirama came to a stop beside her. The woman below them was fingering a flute of champagne, but Sakura had been keeping an eye on her for near that of an hour. It was only her second glass.

“Not quite,” Sakura replied. “Perhaps after another drink.”

“Should I warm her up for you then?”

Sakura turned her gaze away to peer at Tobirama then. There was a reason she had invited him to come along with her. He looked dashing in his black-on-black suit. The color was normally slimming, but this particular outfit made Tobirama’s shoulders broader, his muscles more apparent. Dangerous without being overly intimidating.

He really was an attractive man with his dark eyes and grey hair. Under the shadows of the balcony, the ridges of his cheekbones were emphasized, the cut of his jaw stronger. He was a silver fox. Exactly the type of man Karin was attracted to.

Sakura smoothed her hand over one side of his collar, pressing it down firmer. Then she smiled. “I’ll give you a couple of minutes to get acquainted.”

Tobirama smirked faintly, the harsh shadows making it appear more cruel, before he slipped away. Sakura tracked him as he descended the stairs and slipped through the crowd until he was standing beside Karin. He took her hand as he introduced himself, bowing slightly as he raised the back of her hand towards his mouth. He didn’t kiss her skin, but he came close in a polite greeting.

Sakura hadn’t told Tobirama she was using his charm to gain a hearing with Karin, but he had always been smart. Sakura didn’t put it past Tobirama to have figured it out himself.

From her shadowed vantage point, Sakura watched the pair like a predator. Tobirama flirted with Karin seamlessly, bold but not abrasive. His intentions obvious but unapologetic. The red-haired woman fed on it. From her research, Sakura knew Karin had been starved for attention in her childhood. And who better than Tobirama to give all of his to her now.

Sakura continued to stand there until Tobirama’s gaze briefly flickered in her direction. A silent cue that Karin was ready for her now.

Stepping away from the balcony, Sakura adjusted the shoulder of her black evening gown, ensuring it covered the scarring on her shoulder. At the same time, her phone pinged in her clutch purse, a stark reminder to mute the device before she went into this meeting.

Fetching her phone, Sakura unlocked the screen to silence her ringer when she saw an unusual text message: a simple location with a date and time. It was from an unknown number, but the description was oddly familiar. There was only one person who ever texted her like that:

Itachi.

tbc…

[pastel-rights]

IDV AU Masterlist

I think Masterlist is the correct term?

Anyways, all the IDV AU’s I got at the moment-

Normal IdV AU: So this is my normal IdV AU! Obviously. Ehehe. This one is similar to the game, where they play these dangerous games with the goal of a grand prize. It differs in the character backstories however! Some of these new changes are:

Lucky Guy: In the original game, we don’t know his reasons for playing in such a dangerous game, only that he played in it. He’s known for being the stand in for the detective during the tutorials (as Leo is for the hunter) and the guy doesn’t have much personality. In my AU, Luckster gets an invitation to the manor after an incident that resulted in him losing his memory (and basically his identity lol) which he is offered help with figuring out who he was before everything happened if he played their games. Spoilers, Luckster has no choice but to go.

Aesop Carl: In the original game, it’s noted Aesop’s “mentor” was a serial killer, and Aesop himself had assisted in these murders. He found the manor invite off the person of a woman he had embalmed. In my AU, Aesop still basically helped commit murder, but instead of finding the invite kind of randomly, he meets the Manor’s owner in person, where the owner employs Aesop to embalm the corpses of former participants of their game. Aesop acts more like staff than a participant, but he is still allowed to play in the games. The hunters just aren’t allowed to kill him/let him bleed out. Rocket chair is fine though. (Melissa hates that Aesop has special privileges, she wants to kill him so badly sometimes, this man is so sassy and so snarky and she hates it)

Luca Balsa: I dive into his story a lot more in the Death AU actually! But basically, Luca is blamed for the death of the inventor, goes to prison, gets bailed out and receives manor invite and is tempted solely by the money. In my AU, Luca never got to work of his own choice, and didn’t get to work on his own inventions. He was a prisoner to his work, quite literally. His mentor ran a lot of different experiments on Luca, one of which caused Luca to be able to conduct and control electric currents, instead of the incident being the cause of it. Also this man is like, super touch-starved because his mentor never let him out of the estate. Luca was treated more like an object than a human. The invitation to the manor, to Luca, was an acknowledgement that Luca indeed was a person, and it allowed Luca to do the things Luca wanted to do. 

Also, the more games they play (and win) the more money they get, and depending on their score depends on how much money they get.

IdV Death AU (Normal): If you’ve ever looked at any of my IdV content, you should know about this AU. This is basically the “Timmy murders a bunch of IdV characters she loves starting with Nort and making her way down the list” AU because it’s an AU that follows certain ghosts (Like Norton and Luca) and certain humans (Naib and Edgar) and to get certain characters as ghosts, I have to kill them. Sorry Norton 🤷🏻‍♀️

Here is a more detailed post for this AU. It’s also called the fantasy AU sometimes cause I’m dumb and can’t keep consistent naming.

IdV Racer AU: This is an AU based off the COA IV trailer, as well as incorporating the COA III suits! It takes place before the final race, a couple races before it actually. The moments from before the final race, is told as a flashback by Mike, and after the final race with the COA III team would be “reality”. As for the 5 suits in the essence (Molten Hound/Gamekeeper, Pumping Tires/Acrobat, Fueling Agent/Barmaid, Highway Cavalier/Prospector, and Reflective Mirror/Priestess) and the COA III suits (Netherwalker/Smiley Face, Puppeteer/Mechanic, Whiplash/Cowboy, Trickster/Embalmer, Surveyor/Seer and Vile Blossom/Female Dancer.) Here are the breakdown of the individual suits and their roles.

Molten Hound/Gamekeeper: Bane serves as a challenge for Norton, Demi and Fiona, and has chains on the 3 of them. Out of the three of them, Norton has the most chains on him. Their lives belong to him. And over the years, they’re trying their hardest to break the chains Bane has on them. It’s only after Mike, not bound by Bane’s chains, gets involved that they get their freedom from Bane. Bane notes that there will be more challengers after him, and becomes a spectator to their journey after defeated. He even trains them to be better.

Pumping Tires/Acrobat: Unlike the others, Mike is unbound by Bane‘s chains, meaning he’s free to do whatever he’s like. Growing up in the circus, after a terrible incident that leaves only two survivors, Mike grew up wild, jumping from hyperfixation to hyperfixiation, not caring how well a job paid or not. He always got himself into trouble, and often acted without thinking (such as crashing his car into Bane’s, and drowning in the river because of his actions) which causes a bit of trouble and panic for the others. Before COA, he was known as a very famous acrobat named Mr. Swifts and was well known for his disappearing juggling acts and incredible flexibility. He joined the COA IV team towards the beginning of their final races against Bane, and he was able to bridge the gap because of his chain free status, which helped earn Norton, Demi and Fiona their freedoms, even if it meant giving up his own life. He gets along well with everyone, he isn’t really disturbed by their “strange” habits as other racers are, he finds them very interesting. If anything, he considers himself stranger. He doesn’t give his own life much consideration, he’s too busy trying to save other people’s lives. He would gladly lay down his life to make sure other people could live theirs without fear, and that shows up till his last appearance in the COA IV race, in which the aftermath has him meeting the COA III group. Don’t worry, he reunited with his newly freed friends... after almost a year. The two COA teams see different sides of him. With the COA III team, he gets an outfit similar to the one Vile Blossom wears instead of his COA IV racer outfit or his Mr. Swifts outfit.

Fueling Agent/Barmaid: Demi grew up with the other two COA III racers (Norton and Fiona) and is one of the racers Bane has chains on. She doesn’t really have her own free will, and has (unwilling) done some terrible things, such as sabatoging the engines of other cars. It was her who introduced Mike to the gang initially as one of Bane’s plans to torment the trio, seeing as Mike was pretty well known in the community in general for being a sole Acrobat (He was known as Mr. Swifts at the time) and having something bad happen to a celebrity like him could spell bad news for the crew. Little did Bane know, Mike isn’t the typical celebrity. Far from it. Demi became really interested in Mike after first meeting him, and Bane twisted Demi’s feelings of admiration and crushing into almost an obsession that prevented her from properly functioning (aka daydreaming while driving, dangerous stuff like that) while makes Mike a bit uneasy, but he seems to get over it rather quickly. Like, really quickly. Demi often is the one tending to Norton and Fiona’s wounds, as she doesn’t seem to get hurt as badly. She gets really emotional at times, going from one emotional extreme to another one. She can be unsettlingly happy one moment to extremely angry the next for no reason.

Highway Cavalier/Prospector: Norton has had the most experiences with Bane’s control. He’s also one of the few people Bane has used to make an example out of (the scar of his face) to instill fear into the others. He’s suffered through a lot trying to win his freedom and his friend’s freedom, but no matter what he does, he can’t break Bane’s chains. Not alone at least. When Mike is introduced to the trio by Demi, Norton can almost hear Bane’s thoughts. He knows Bane wants to hurt Mike to get the trio to do something or to get the public to act a certain way towards them, he just knows Bane’s intentions aren’t good. So he distances himself, he tries to drive Mike away so that Bane can’t use them to hurt him, but his harsh exterior is pretty quickly and easily broken by Mike. He goes from tolerating Mike to starting to enjoying Mike’s presence, although he’s very hesitant letting Mike race with them (cause of Bane and all), he generally is very open to hanging out with Mike. Norton gets hurt a lot, before forces himself to keep going, because in his mind, no matter what he goes through, it’ll be worth it when he earns his freedom. Bane likes to hold this over his head, and more times than not, Norton’s in critical condition and depressed by the end of it.

Reflective Mirror/Priestess: Fiona is very cold and closed-off. She used to be this upbeat, outgoing friendly figure, but Bane’s broken her to the point she feels everyone is out to get her. She often feels like everyone is using her, and only through confirmation from Norton and Demi is she able to get over this type of mentality. She’s also very unsure about Mike, but for different reasons than Norton. She feels like Mike is hiding something, she has this image of Mike that isn’t what the other two have. She doesn’t really mind Mike but she doesn’t trust him. It isn’t till Mike saves her after Bane crashes her car initially that Fiona realizes Mike isn’t all bad. Fiona still stays a bit cold towards Mike, but Mike doesn’t really care. Although, the Mike Fiona sees is more of a hidden personality, and the Mike Demi and Norton sees is more of Mike’s surface personailty. Being a priestess has granted her many abilities, after all.

Netherwalker/Smiley Face: Similar to Bane, he serves as a challenge. He’s a bit worse than Bane if I’m honest, he exceeds in mental torture instead of physical torture. He often messes with people’s thoughts, as well as the way the see the world. He acts like a hallucination almost. He can reveal himself to whoever he decides, and uses it to drive the COA III team insane almost. He often overlooks everyone, and takes pride in his abilities. A certain acrobat’s actions catches his eyes though... needless to say, he is not prepared to deal with Mike. No one ever is. He’s able to strike up deals, and is very convincing. Knowing Mike was the one who broke the Molten Hound’s chains interests him, he wants to see how far he can push Mike before Mike shatters. He makes a deal, to bring him back to life to discover the truth, but awakens a much darker side of Mike in the process, corrupting the Acrobat as a result.

Puppeteer/Mechanic: Being a very curious soul, Tracy struggled to understand the predicament she found herself in. Tormented by the Netherwalker, she is driven crazy by everything she doesn’t know. On top of that, when a certain Acrobat arrives (assumed dead at first), this just adds to her frustration. Yet she’s curious, intrigued by what happened to him.

“He looks like a racer, no?”

“Did you hear about that big incident on the racetrack? One of the racers swerved off the race track and straight into the ocean. They never found a body, you think this may be him?”

“I heard he wasn’t even a racer, but a jack of all traits. He did whatever he wanted, most famous for being an acrobat.”

“How curious... I wonder if he survived his trip.”

She’s obsessed with finding out what happened to Mike, as well as the COA IV team, and it’s this burning desire to uncover the truth that brings the two COA teams together. So ya... Mike’s recklessness and Tracy’s curiosity is what brought the two teams together.

Whiplash/Cowboy: The poor guy has no idea what’s going on. He goes out for an hour and comes back to a washed up body, and Tracy making a new journal dedicated to finding out the truth. He’s very serious, very protective over the whole group. He’s rather levelheaded, yet once you get to know him, he shows his softer side. He isn’t that phased by the Netherwalker’s attempts to break him, but he’s always concerned for his companions. He’s also pretty knowledgeable, he keeps up with the news a lot.

Trickster/Embalmer: Aesop is very gentle in the way he goes about things. He is careful with what he says, and often hides things from the others. He’s very cryptic, and often twists things to sound worse/better than they are. Puppeteer hates it when he does this, because it shows he knows the truth of the incident and he’s purposely withholding it from her. More times than not, he gets in trouble for it. But after Mike’s arrival, it almost seems like the play field has flipped. He’s no longer the one in control. He’s just as clueless as the rest of the COA III team. And that is what drives him mad. No Netherwalker involved. Yet.

Surveyor/Seer: Eli chooses to see the world from a bird’s eye view. He comes at every issue objectively, and often will lean in whatever direction is better to his advantage. It’s Brooke Rose who finds Mike a couple minutes after he washes up on shore. At this point, Eli can tell Mike is no longer among the living, yet he can feel something special about him, so he (painstakingly) drags Mike to the others. Like Aesop, Eli knows things that the others don’t because of the way he can choose to view the world, but he doesn’t tend to hide it. He only says what he thinks is important. He is very thrown off by the whole situation. In the end, Eli’s the one who takes up The Netherwalker’s offer to bring Mike back with the intention of learning why Mike was brought to them. In Eli’s mind, there has to be a reason, right? There always was. He eventually gets everyone else on board too.

Vile Blossom/Female Dancer: Margaretha knew Mike before everything happened, and to Margaretha, it all seems to happen at once. From losing her only job to becoming her favorite poetry’s champion, she didn’t have time to wonder. She knows she left Mike all alone, she takes full responsibility for what happened to him. Of what he became. Margaretha was like a motherly figure to Mike, she let him down. She would do anything to make it right. She knows that when the Netherwalker offers to revive her deceased companion, that he isn’t doing it with kind intentions, yet she wants to know his story, she wants to know what happened, for different reasons than everyone else. She oversees Mike while he’s in the care of the COA III team.

IdV Cameras AU: In this AU, Joseph is the most powerful, as implied by the cameras in the name. It basically explores the pasts of the characters in the Death/Fantasy AU, as well as exploring different character paths entirely if he tweaked small things (like having Xie Bi’an come back before Fan drowns, or having Luca bailed out before he gets hanged.) to use those versions of those characters. He can create custom versions of whatever character he so pleases, and then use them to his advantage. It can be a precursor to the Death AU, but in this AU in particular, he explore these alternative paths to see where they led, finding out some things (like the inventor’s death, as well as Fan’s death) are inevitable.

[dailytomlinson]

The last of the One Direction lot to release his debut album, Louis Tomlinson took his time making his first full-length.

"It's taken me the best part of four years to finish it, so naturally, you know, there's a lot of heart in it," he considers, "a lot of emotion, a lot of honesty I think. And the most important thing for me, whenever I'm writing a song, is that the lyrics are really important to me. I just want to make people feel something, and through honesty, that becomes a little bit easier, you know? So I feel like, hopefully, I've made an honest and interesting record."

A lot has happened for Louis in the past ten years. He was catapulted into stardom as part of One Direction in 2010, left that group in 2015, returned to The X Factor in 2018 as a judge, became a footballer for a bit, had a child, and sadly lost his mother in 2016 and sister Felicité in 2019. A lot of those themes make it onto 'Walls', the latter forming the lyrics for the record's lead single 'Two Of Us'.

"Honesty and vulnerability at times is relatable, and it's important sometimes talk about certain things. I'm always conscious of being as transparent as I possibly can to my fans and to any listener."

Of course, his first solo ventures, 'Just Hold On' with Steve Aoki and 'Back To You' with Bebe Rexha and Digital Farm Animals, are miles away from the music he returned with in 2019, but he maintains the change of direction was for the best. "I just don't think that those songs are true to the artist that I want to be. Although they were right to me at the time, if you put them in the middle of this album, they would definitely stand out."

Where Harry's albums channel 70s rock and artsy pop, Niall's debut had the singer/songwriter vibe a la Sheeran and Capaldi, and Liam and Zayn opted for chart-friendly R&B pop, on 'Walls', Louis goes back to his roots, doing his best to emulate the Northern indie rockers he grew up on. "I feel like a lot of influence happens subconsciously. It's what you're listening to at the time or what you've grown up with. In terms of who I look up to, Alex Turner and the way that he writes as a lyricist is incredible, especially in the early Arctic Monkeys stuff. I always talk about Amy Winehouse's level of detail, again as a lyricist, and how descriptive she was was incredible. Obviously, I'm a massive, massive Oasis fan that goes without saying."

"Coming out of One Direction, it was a bit of improvising, a bit of trial and error"

Chatting to Louis, it's easy to forget he was part of one of the biggest groups of all time, because he just comes across as a down to earth and, well, normal bloke. It's like seeing an old school friend in the pub and having a catch-up.

He's never lost his accent, and his dedication to his hometown of Doncaster is unmatched. He's returning to the Doncaster Dome on tour, was signed as a Doncaster Rovers player, and even in his early solo days, took Bebe Rexha to the Keepmoat Stadium for a video shoot.

"I always try and be as true to myself as I can. I've always been very aware of where I've come from, and very proud of where I've come from. I fuckin love Doncaster. My family still live there, I go there all't time, well, not all't time, but as much as I can. Those influences that I've grown up with were vital on my first album, they're definitely part of it's DNA.

"This was always where my heart lies. I mean, I spent most of my youth in Priory, back when it were ten quid all you could drink – which was fucking mint. That really pushed me towards big choruses and guitars, basically - you know, like a Catfish and the Bottlemen kinda record, that's the sound I really love."

Likening his experience of finding his feet after 1D's disbandment ("hiatus") to that of a brand new artist, it took Louis a while to get comfortable with the music he was making.

"A lot of developing artists when they first start their career, they spend two, three, maybe even five years in the background developing and waiting for that one moment, that one song, that one album. And I kind of had to live out that whole development period in the public eye. Naturally, after coming out of One Direction, it was a bit of improvising, a bit of trial and error and working out exactly who I should be as an artist. It took some time, I didn't want to rush it."

He did dip his toe into the songwriting waters during his time in 1D, if getting a writing credit on 37 of their songs counts as dipping a toe, but felt he needed time rediscovering himself.

"It was really important to me; it was only from the third album onwards that we really got trusted with having a real influence on the songwriting. It's something I'm really proud of, and they're definitely skills that have helped me in the solo career."

Funnily enough, One Direction's third album seemed to be the point where their music took a stadium rock-ish turn, which never really let up for the remainder of their career (see: 'Midnight Memories', 'Where Do Broken Hearts Go', 'Drag Me Down'). Maybe Louis always had those big choruses in him after all.

"I have the luxury of being a positive person"

There are plenty of references to walls and fences on (aptly titled) 'Walls', which could easily be read as feeling like he needed to break out, but he says that's not necessarily what he means.

"I normally shy away from metaphor, but it was relevant in the song definitely. I'm sure that's how some people might interpret it. But it's more about general growth in life and any problems or mistakes that you make along the way. It's more about realising that, and I'm very proud of my One Direction roots, massively."

Strangely, he says joining One Direction humbled him. As a cocky teenager, being thrust into the spotlight and feeling like a small fish in a very large, Simon Cowell-controlled pond affected the boys in different ways.

"I was a bit of a show-off, really. I came into One Direction with a bit of an ego; I did think a lot of myself, I'm not gonna lie. It was quite a sobering experience. I was a bit of a show-off when I was a kid to be fair, like I love making people laugh and all that. I wasn't very hardworking. I'd say I'm hardworking now, but I definitely wasn't when I was a young lad."

And does he feel like he's changed much since finishing with the group five years ago?

"It feels like it did in One Direction, just a diluted version really. I'm lucky I still have a certain amount of hardcore fans who follow my every move. So in terms of the difference in like privacy and stuff, that hasn't really changed too much. But, you know, it is what it is. It's what I've signed up for, apparently."

It doesn't come across like the fame gets to him, perhaps in a way it has done in the past. He seems relaxed, confident, more candid than he was on any 1D press run (e.g., he's allowed to swear now), and like genuinely, despite everything, he's in a good place.

"I have the luxury of being a positive person and seeing the glass as half full. Whenever I reflect on those times of me feeling a little bit emotional, I always do see a light at the end of the tunnel. It's just extending that idea that you know, trying to induce hope."

Louis Tomlinson's album 'Walls' is out 31st January.

[nierly-amazing]

I know I’ve written something similar before and maybe I'm being petty and reading into shit too much, but I honestly just can’t deal with 9S haters. Like, you got the generic weeby incels that are jealous that their fictional waifu is interested in nerdy twink 9S which shatters their "feemales only go for the chads" shitty worldview. Those are easy enough to ignore because they’re just shit people in general and not worth my time. Plus it’s really straightforward and doesn’t have me sitting down thinking “why does this bother me so much?”.

But then you have another group of people that I honestly can’t stand because you look at their hot takes on 9S and think “did we even play the same game?” They reduce him to some flat one dimensional possessive/whiny man child thot boi (No I’m never gonna forget that insult because it’s horrifically beautiful).

I’ve been wondering why it annoys me so much when I don’t really care if people don’t like my favs from other stories and I think it’s a mix of a few reasons. 

One is like I mentioned above in that they get his character so wrong, it’s like they played an entirely different game. 

Another is that they act like the negative (and “negative”) things he does do is for completely no reason whatsoever without acknowledging a whole bunch of fuckshit that helps make him who he is “today”. So we just got “oh he’s possessive and violent and whiny ew” without even thinking about: 

All the trauma that 9S went through both before, and during route C.

The fact that he was infected by a logic virus for most of route C. Yes, most. I don’t remember where but it says in some supplementary material that the virus was fucking with him since way before he transplanted the arm.

The fact that the Red Girls and machines were tormenting him during route C and already pushing him to the extremes. Remember what happened in the Soul Box? Plus Adam torturing him about his feelings for 2B in the copied city wasn’t exactly helpful.

The fact that his only purpose was to be a disposable information gatherer for a pointless war. He was designed with a friendly and curious and emotional personality and was forced to work alone for a lot of his life, told that he wasn’t allowed to display those emotions, and punished with death whenever he got too curious. I’d say he gets a pass to whine about missions every now and then.

The fact that 2B killed him and erased his memories FORTY-SEVEN times and just because she hates doing it and he forgives her doesn't change the fact that she did it and how much it would mess up his perception of anything really. (Bonus points if they think 2B's some perfect stoic lesbian goddess who can do no wrong and has absolutely no romantic interest in 9S). Same with the fact that she was still cold and strict with him most of the time they were together even if he did eventually find out she’s not like that deep down.

The fact that 2B was the one and only constant in his life through all his resets. It would take a fucking saint to not develop some unhealthy attachment/possessive thoughts in that situation. Especially with the Red Girls tormenting him by trying to delete his memories of her in the Soul Box. Like it’s not good or healthy and even I was like “nooo 9S baby please don’t be like that” in the clone fight/his possessive monologue in the book at that point. But it sure as hell is realistic and understandable to become possessive of someone that keeps getting taken away from you. 

The fact that he hates himself for the way he feels about 2B. He doesn’t act on any of his feelings and always backs off when 2B says no about anything from calling him “Nines” to taking a break after a mission. He might grumble and complain a bit but pretty quickly shuts up. 

The fact that he lost everything he loves in the span of a few hours and watched the most important person in the world get skewered by a smelly cryptid doppelganger. (Pile on the fact that said smelly cryptid doppelganger did nothing to clear things up about it when there were plenty of easy ways to do so (don't get me wrong I love A2, but she's an idiot)).

The fact that even in his route C rampage his anger was still only directed at machines and A2. He helped other androids without complaints, even ones he didn't know. And he was still visibly upset when he saw Pascal's Village and Pascal’s memory loss. 

This whole nonsense reminds me of some SU discourse of people hating on Lapiz for the way she responded to Jasper's abuse. Could she have made better decisions? Maybe. But she was trapped in a mirror for 5000 years, immediately attacked after being released, then captured and tortured again. What the hell do you expect?

And to a lesser extent, it reminds me of how people react to Shinji, calling him whiny and tell all those “get in the fucking robot” jokes. The poor kid went through so much shit comparable somewhat to what 9S went through.

I guess the thing that really bothers me is that I relate really hard to 9S and the shit he went through (obviously to a much lesser extent, thankfully I haven’t lost all of my loved ones in a horrific massacre or anything like that). But I can relate to having everything falling apart in my life and not having the support or experience I needed to get through it without fucking up a lot. 

And as an autistic person with a bunch of other brain shits, I was so happy seeing a character that was (intentionally or not) coded with these same things. So it gets me, even more, when I see people going “ew no he’s bad” because of those traits as if they expect someone with no support network or therapy to just be able to Handle It All on their own. When I see people refusing to be compassionate towards 9S for what he’s gone through, I’m reminded of people that refuse to be compassionate to good people who’ve fucked up because they’re unable to deal with it on their own. (And I sure as hell wouldn’t be surprised if they’re the same people.)

You can like a character or person at the same time as acknowledging what they’re doing wrong. (And on the flip side you don’t have to ignore the faults of characters you do like and paint them as beautiful flawless goddesses).

It’s not often you get a kind, gentle, and emotional male character that doesn’t act all high and mighty and above the female characters just because he’s a dude. It’s also not often you get the scripts flipped in terms of gender expectations as well. Give him a chance to come back and grow past all the trauma that shaped him during route C. He’s a good boy. He’s little, and broken, but still good.

Yeah, still good.

I end this with the wise words of a good friend: “9S is great fuck all yall nerds learn some goddamn empathy the end”.

[louistomlinsoncouk]

The last of the One Direction lot to release his debut album, Louis Tomlinson took his time making his first full-length.

"It's taken me the best part of four years to finish it, so naturally, you know, there's a lot of heart in it," he considers, "a lot of emotion, a lot of honesty I think. And the most important thing for me, whenever I'm writing a song, is that the lyrics are really important to me. I just want to make people feel something, and through honesty, that becomes a little bit easier, you know? So I feel like, hopefully, I've made an honest and interesting record."

A lot has happened for Louis in the past ten years. He was catapulted into stardom as part of One Direction in 2010, left that group in 2015, returned to The X Factor in 2018 as a judge, became a footballer for a bit, and sadly lost his mother in 2016 and sister Felicité in 2019. A lot of those themes make it onto 'Walls', the latter forming the lyrics for the record's lead single 'Two Of Us'.

"Honesty and vulnerability at times is relatable, and it's important sometimes talk about certain things. I'm always conscious of being as transparent as I possibly can to my fans and to any listener."

Of course, his first solo ventures, 'Just Hold On' with Steve Aoki and 'Back To You' with Bebe Rexha and Digital Farm Animals, are miles away from the music he returned with in 2019, but he maintains the change of direction was for the best. "I just don't think that those songs are true to the artist that I want to be. Although they were right to me at the time, if you put them in the middle of this album, they would definitely stand out."

Where Harry's albums channel 70s rock and artsy pop, Niall's debut had the singer/songwriter vibe a la Sheeran and Capaldi, and Liam and Zayn opted for chart-friendly R&B pop, on 'Walls', Louis goes back to his roots, doing his best to emulate the Northern indie rockers he grew up on. "I feel like a lot of influence happens subconsciously. It's what you're listening to at the time or what you've grown up with. In terms of who I look up to, Alex Turner and the way that he writes as a lyricist is incredible, especially in the early Arctic Monkeys stuff. I always talk about Amy Winehouse's level of detail, again as a lyricist, and how descriptive she was was incredible. Obviously, I'm a massive, massive Oasis fan that goes without saying."

Chatting to Louis, it's easy to forget he was part of one of the biggest groups of all time, because he just comes across as a down to earth and, well, normal bloke. It's like seeing an old school friend in the pub and having a catch-up.

He's never lost his accent, and his dedication to his hometown of Doncaster is unmatched. He's returning to the Doncaster Dome on tour, was signed as a Doncaster Rovers player, and even in his early solo days, took Bebe Rexha to the Keepmoat Stadium for a video shoot.

"I always try and be as true to myself as I can. I've always been very aware of where I've come from, and very proud of where I've come from. I fuckin love Doncaster. My family still live there, I go there all't time, well, not all't time, but as much as I can. Those influences that I've grown up with were vital on my first album, they're definitely part of it's DNA.

"This was always where my heart lies. I mean, I spent most of my youth in Priory, back when it were ten quid all you could drink – which was fucking mint. That really pushed me towards big choruses and guitars, basically - you know, like a Catfish and the Bottlemen kinda record, that's the sound I really love."

Likening his experience of finding his feet after 1D's disbandment ("hiatus") to that of a brand new artist, it took Louis a while to get comfortable with the music he was making.

"A lot of developing artists when they first start their career, they spend two, three, maybe even five years in the background developing and waiting for that one moment, that one song, that one album. And I kind of had to live out that whole development period in the public eye. Naturally, after coming out of One Direction, it was a bit of improvising, a bit of trial and error and working out exactly who I should be as an artist. It took some time, I didn't want to rush it."

He did dip his toe into the songwriting waters during his time in 1D, if getting a writing credit on 37 of their songs counts as dipping a toe, but felt he needed time rediscovering himself.

"It was really important to me; it was only from the third album onwards that we really got trusted with having a real influence on the songwriting. It's something I'm really proud of, and they're definitely skills that have helped me in the solo career."

Funnily enough, One Direction's third album seemed to be the point where their music took a stadium rock-ish turn, which never really let up for the remainder of their career (see: 'Midnight Memories', 'Where Do Broken Hearts Go', 'Drag Me Down'). Maybe Louis always had those big choruses in him after all.

There are plenty of references to walls and fences on (aptly titled) 'Walls', which could easily be read as feeling like he needed to break out, but he says that's not necessarily what he means.

"I normally shy away from metaphor, but it was relevant in the song definitely. I'm sure that's how some people might interpret it. But it's more about general growth in life and any problems or mistakes that you make along the way. It's more about realising that, and I'm very proud of my One Direction roots, massively."

Strangely, he says joining One Direction humbled him. As a cocky teenager, being thrust into the spotlight and feeling like a small fish in a very large, Simon Cowell-controlled pond affected the boys in different ways.

"I was a bit of a show-off, really. I came into One Direction with a bit of an ego; I did think a lot of myself, I'm not gonna lie. It was quite a sobering experience. I was a bit of a show-off when I was a kid to be fair, like I love making people laugh and all that. I wasn't very hardworking. I'd say I'm hardworking now, but I definitely wasn't when I was a young lad."

And does he feel like he's changed much since finishing with the group five years ago?

"It feels like it did in One Direction, just a diluted version really. I'm lucky I still have a certain amount of hardcore fans who follow my every move. So in terms of the difference in like privacy and stuff, that hasn't really changed too much. But, you know, it is what it is. It's what I've signed up for, apparently."

It doesn't come across like the fame gets to him, perhaps in a way it has done in the past. He seems relaxed, confident, more candid than he was on any 1D press run (e.g., he's allowed to swear now), and like genuinely, despite everything, he's in a good place.

"I have the luxury of being a positive person and seeing the glass as half full. Whenever I reflect on those times of me feeling a little bit emotional, I always do see a light at the end of the tunnel. It's just extending that idea that you know, trying to induce hope."

Louis Tomlinson's album 'Walls' is out 31st January.

[elceeu2morrow]

Published: 2:45 pm, January 30, 2020  Words: Abigail Firth.

The last of the One Direction lot to release his debut album, Louis Tomlinson took his time making his first full-length.

"It's taken me the best part of four years to finish it, so naturally, you know, there's a lot of heart in it," he considers, "a lot of emotion, a lot of honesty I think. And the most important thing for me, whenever I'm writing a song, is that the lyrics are really important to me. I just want to make people feel something, and through honesty, that becomes a little bit easier, you know? So I feel like, hopefully, I've made an honest and interesting record."

A lot has happened for Louis in the past ten years. He was catapulted into stardom as part of One Direction in 2010, left that group in 2015, returned to The X Factor in 2018 as a judge, became a footballer for a bit, had a child, and sadly lost his mother in 2016 and sister Felicité in 2019. A lot of those themes make it onto 'Walls', the latter forming the lyrics for the record's lead single 'Two Of Us'.

"Honesty and vulnerability at times is relatable, and it's important sometimes talk about certain things. I'm always conscious of being as transparent as I possibly can to my fans and to any listener."

Of course, his first solo ventures, 'Just Hold On' with Steve Aoki and 'Back To You' with Bebe Rexha and Digital Farm Animals, are miles away from the music he returned with in 2019, but he maintains the change of direction was for the best. "I just don't think that those songs are true to the artist that I want to be. Although they were right to me at the time, if you put them in the middle of this album, they would definitely stand out."

Where Harry's albums channel 70s rock and artsy pop, Niall's debut had the singer/songwriter vibe a la Sheeran and Capaldi, and Liam and Zayn opted for chart-friendly R&B pop, on 'Walls', Louis goes back to his roots, doing his best to emulate the Northern indie rockers he grew up on. "I feel like a lot of influence happens subconsciously. It's what you're listening to at the time or what you've grown up with. In terms of who I look up to, Alex Turner and the way that he writes as a lyricist is incredible, especially in the early Arctic Monkeys stuff. I always talk about Amy Winehouse's level of detail, again as a lyricist, and how descriptive she was was incredible. Obviously, I'm a massive, massive Oasis fan that goes without saying."

Chatting to Louis, it's easy to forget he was part of one of the biggest groups of all time, because he just comes across as a down to earth and, well, normal bloke. It's like seeing an old school friend in the pub and having a catch-up.

He's never lost his accent, and his dedication to his hometown of Doncaster is unmatched. He's returning to the Doncaster Dome on tour, was signed as a Doncaster Rovers player, and even in his early solo days, took Bebe Rexha to the Keepmoat Stadium for a video shoot.

"I always try and be as true to myself as I can. I've always been very aware of where I've come from, and very proud of where I've come from. I fuckin love Doncaster. My family still live there, I go there all't time, well, not all't time, but as much as I can. Those influences that I've grown up with were vital on my first album, they're definitely part of it's DNA.

"This was always where my heart lies. I mean, I spent most of my youth in Priory, back when it were ten quid all you could drink – which was fucking mint. That really pushed me towards big choruses and guitars, basically - you know, like a Catfish and the Bottlemen kinda record, that's the sound I really love."

Likening his experience of finding his feet after 1D's disbandment ("hiatus") to that of a brand new artist, it took Louis a while to get comfortable with the music he was making.

"A lot of developing artists when they first start their career, they spend two, three, maybe even five years in the background developing and waiting for that one moment, that one song, that one album. And I kind of had to live out that whole development period in the public eye. Naturally, after coming out of One Direction, it was a bit of improvising, a bit of trial and error and working out exactly who I should be as an artist. It took some time, I didn't want to rush it."

He did dip his toe into the songwriting waters during his time in 1D, if getting a writing credit on 37 of their songs counts as dipping a toe, but felt he needed time rediscovering himself.

"It was really important to me; it was only from the third album onwards that we really got trusted with having a real influence on the songwriting. It's something I'm really proud of, and they're definitely skills that have helped me in the solo career."

Funnily enough, One Direction's third album seemed to be the point where their music took a stadium rock-ish turn, which never really let up for the remainder of their career (see: 'Midnight Memories', 'Where Do Broken Hearts Go', 'Drag Me Down'). Maybe Louis always had those big choruses in him after all.

There are plenty of references to walls and fences on (aptly titled) 'Walls', which could easily be read as feeling like he needed to break out, but he says that's not necessarily what he means.

"I normally shy away from metaphor, but it was relevant in the song definitely. I'm sure that's how some people might interpret it. But it's more about general growth in life and any problems or mistakes that you make along the way. It's more about realising that, and I'm very proud of my One Direction roots, massively."

Strangely, he says joining One Direction humbled him. As a cocky teenager, being thrust into the spotlight and feeling like a small fish in a very large, Simon Cowell-controlled pond affected the boys in different ways.

"I was a bit of a show-off, really. I came into One Direction with a bit of an ego; I did think a lot of myself, I'm not gonna lie. It was quite a sobering experience. I was a bit of a show-off when I was a kid to be fair, like I love making people laugh and all that. I wasn't very hardworking. I'd say I'm hardworking now, but I definitely wasn't when I was a young lad."

And does he feel like he's changed much since finishing with the group five years ago?

"It feels like it did in One Direction, just a diluted version really. I'm lucky I still have a certain amount of hardcore fans who follow my every move. So in terms of the difference in like privacy and stuff, that hasn't really changed too much. But, you know, it is what it is. It's what I've signed up for, apparently."

It doesn't come across like the fame gets to him, perhaps in a way it has done in the past. He seems relaxed, confident, more candid than he was on any 1D press run (e.g., he's allowed to swear now), and like genuinely, despite everything, he's in a good place.

"I have the luxury of being a positive person and seeing the glass as half full. Whenever I reflect on those times of me feeling a little bit emotional, I always do see a light at the end of the tunnel. It's just extending that idea that you know, trying to induce hope."

Louis Tomlinson's album 'Walls' is out 31st January. 

[hollyhockash]

World-Class Wonder (full quest set)

[an Aspect quest set about focused practice at the highest levels of a sport or art] [full Shepherd and Storyteller arcs available]

You’re good at something. In fact, you’re one of the best in the world. This is about how you get even better at it, and some of the things that happen along the way.

This quest set is for chess grandmasters, world-record speedrunners, Olympic gymnasts, and marathon runners alike: because being at the top of your field is a peculiarly similar experience, no matter what you're doing.

This quest set consists of five quests, each with a full-size and simplified version. I am posting them in the order in which you would play them for Aspect. Here’s a quickref of the quests, their XP numbers, and the arcs they can go on:

Practice Makes... (20-30/35 XP) (Aspect 1/Shepherd 1/Storyteller 3)

A New Perspective (25/35 XP) (Aspect 2/Shepherd 2/Storyteller 1/2)

Exhibition Match (25/45 XP) (Aspect 3/Shepherd 5/Storyteller 2)

A Rivalry (30/45 XP) (Aspect 4/Shepherd 3/4/Storyteller 4)

The Moments You Missed (20/30 XP) (Aspect 5/Shepherd 3/Storyteller 5)

Arc Features

On this quest set, you will need to define a Sport: the thing you are one of the best at, and the thing you are continuing to work on. While it does not have to literally be a traditional sport, it is competitive and easily measurable. (Thus, pure mathematics research isn’t really appropriate; it has to be Math Olympiad.) Usually it is also a thing where you are ultimately a solo competitor. (Team sports, for example, could probably be shoehorned into this quest set with some modification, but they’re not what I built this set for.) The Sport also has a community of practice - a lot of other people who also know the Skill and are also trying to get better at it.

Your Sport needs to be on your character sheet as a mortal skill (although it’s okay if the wording of what the skill is called is slightly different), and it will almost always be rated 3 or 4. This is because this quest set is designed for things that you've worked hard to get to a very high level at, and I believe that this kind of work must be done on the mortal level. A few people may get away with the skill at 2, if it’s backed by a Bondfliction or miracle that makes you The Very Best, or if it’s something absurdly niche like speedrunning Action 52’s The Cheetahmen, but that’s not recommended.

Also, your Sport is something you genuinely love pursuing. This is something you willingly give up large parts of your life to practice. This quest set is not designed for an outside authority forcing you to pursue the Sport. If you need an explanation as to why this is the case, see the Arc Notes.

Skills for this quest are things like:

chess

gymnastics

go (the board game)

martial arts

musical instrument(s) such as violin or piano

competitive dueling

competitive magic dueling

stunt flying (with a plane, or wings)

a competitive video game, like a fighting game or head-to-head Starcraft

video game speedrunning

swimming

track and field (running, and things adjacent to running)

The conceptual penumbra of your Sport skill here will be quite large, and you can use it for a lot of different things. Not only are you comfortable with practicing your Sport and things related to it, you have an extensive network of contacts related to the Sport, you can teach the Sport reasonably well, and you’ll regularly find financial or fame-related opportunities related to your Sport (such as speaking engagements, getting free trips to play video games pre-release, or offers to put your face on the cover of national magazines). I mean, obviously you will still have an Obstacle 3 to use Swimming to fix a clothes dryer, but even then the HG should let you have a relatively free hand here. Maybe when you give up and call someone else to repair it, they turn out to be a big fan of you and give you a discount?

You will also have a Community. This is a group of people who are also pursuing your Sport. At least some of them will be roughly equal to your skill level, and you regularly compete with them on a friendly basis; they are also, to an extent, a social club. This is because when you are incredibly interested in something, and other people are also incredibly interested in something, and you often interact with each other in the context of competitions, you already have a lot of surface area to bond over.

Arc Notes

Aspect arc

Practice Makes...

A New Perspective

Exhibition Match

A Rivalry

The Moments You Missed

This is the original order of this quest set, and fairly straightforward. Your routine involves practicing every day and not really getting anywhere. Then you discover another school of thought. After that, you show off your skills to lots of people. If you continue on, you could end up in a dramatic rivalry, and might also have to confront the fact that you've lost touch with another part of your life.

Shepherd arc

Practice Makes...

A New Perspective

A Rivalry or The Moments You Missed

A Rivalry

Exhibition Match

In the Shepherd version of this quest set, your ordinary routine of practice every day is disrupted by your discovery of a new school of thought, and you work through that for a while. After that, you either finally manage to demonstrate yourself as someone's equal or come to terms with how much you haven't been able to do. Beyond that, you might participate in a legendary battle with another titan in your Sport. And possibly, eventually, you go around showing off just how good you are.

Storyteller arc

A New Perspective

A New Perspective or Exhibition Match

Practice Makes...

A Rivalry

The Moments You Missed

You find yourself suddenly interested in a new way to approach your Sport. Then you either continue to pursue that path to try to wring more results out of it, or you spend some time trying to show other people that this way is better. Eventually, you end up lost and at an impasse as to what to do next. Perhaps you are pushed to new heights by a personal desire to best a rival, and might find yourself facing the fact that you've pushed aside "little" things that are no longer quite so little.

Distinct lack of Emptiness arc

This quest set is designed for a Sport that you give up large parts of your life to practice. On the Aspect, Shepherd, and Storyteller arcs, you do this (mostly) willingly and gladly, and the bad parts come from how much of your life you give up to pursue it. As best as I can tell, then, the Emptiness arc for this quest set would be for you to break because pursuing this would force you to lose other things you cared about.

I can’t write that arc.

To explain why, let me tell you a story.

I am classically trained in piano. Part of piano classical training is to learn to play complex songs from memory. There is a special type of recital - piano competitions, in my case, although I assume there exist similar events for other instruments - where you go about showing off your memorized song playing to judges, who then rate you for your performance/interpretation and award medals, much like figure skating or gymnastics routines.

My sister and I were at one such competition. They had practice rooms, one piano to one soundproofed tiny room. These pianos were in the practice rooms because they were broken in some way; almost all had strings (and thus notes) missing, and some had actual keys missing. When I got to the venue, I went to one of these practice rooms and did some last-minute rehearsal of my song. Eventually, my performance timeslot rolled around, and so I performed the song in front of the judges and an audience, and did so reasonably well.

I was later told (by my other parent, on the ride back home) that my younger sister, when confronted with these practice rooms, went to each piano, said “this piano is broken, so I can’t practice at it”, and demanded to go to a different room, and did this again and again until her actual performance timeslot came up. Then she completely failed to perform the song, as she hadn’t actually memorized how to play it.

We had been given the same amount of training, put through the same amount of required practice, and expected to perform the same. But I wanted to be good at piano, and she didn’t, and in the end that was all that mattered.

(Later on, I encountered depression, and also moved away from that piano teacher, so I stopped. But that’s another story.)

To write this Emptiness arc, then, would be to assert that it is possible to train someone to the highest levels of performance without their consent. Certainly, it is possible to train someone to bare proficiency if you use enough force. But for someone to reach the highest levels of their craft, they have to want it with all their heart. The truly world class spend their days planning out what they want to try next, and their nights dreaming of innovations. That drive can't be forced.

As such: when you experience training as Emptiness, as something that you are broken into pursuing, that’s a story so different that it cannot be fit into this quest structure.

I would know.

Practice Makes...

Aspect 1/Shepherd 1/Storyteller 3

Realistically, when you're one of the best in the world at something, you have to practice intensively every day to maintain your skills. This isn't even time spent improving yourself. This is devoting an hour or two a day just to keep the rust off.

(Mind you, in Chuubo’s realism is not really a concern, but for the purposes of this quest set, the point stands.)

Practice Makes... (35 XP)

This is the one where you are actively struggling to keep up, and it’s hard, and it feels like the goalposts keep moving.

Major Goals: The HG can award you 5 XP towards this quest when:

you suffer a minor injury such as a sprained ankle

you acquire a new nifty gadget that purports to help with your performance and then stop using it after a few tries

you hear of someone younger who is more talented and better than you

You can earn each bonus once, for a total of up to 15 XP.

Quest flavor: 1/chapter, you can earn a bonus XP for this quest when you:

wait all day for something that was supposed to be done within an hour or so, with no explanation as to what’s taking so long

get up extremely early for practice

eat a granola bar

write emails or letters to other people in your Community

wash your hands carefully and thoroughly with soap

do maintenance on the equipment you use for your Sport

irrevocably screw up a practice run or practice test and have to start over

You can combine this with an XP action, but you're not required to.

Practice Makes... (Simplified) (20-30 XP)

This is the one where you’re just... practicing. You know? It’s not really such a big deal. (This version is not suited for use on the Storyteller arc.)

This is a Shepherd anytime quest, where the catchphrase is something like “I need to go to practice”.

A New Perspective

Aspect 2/Shepherd 2/Storyteller 1/2

You change the focus of your studies/practices. Sometimes you're looking into a different school of thought (studying AlphaGo's record instead of historical Go games). Sometimes you are focusing on a different specialization (speedrunning glitchless instead of glitched).

A New Perspective (35 XP)

This is for when changing your practice opens up a whole new field of opportunity.

Major Goals: The HG can award you 5 XP towards this quest when:

you acquire a major upgrade for the equipment you use for your Sport

you take a complete break from your Sport, doing your best to push it out of mind, for at least a Chapter

you establish a way that you can practice your Sport without actually literally playing through it (thinking through chess problems instead of playing chess; practicing high diving moves suspended on ropes above a trampoline; using one of those extremely good trumpet mute microphones that digitally processes it back into sounding like a real trumpet)

You can earn each bonus once, for a total of up to 15 XP.

Quest flavor: 1/chapter, you can earn a bonus XP for this quest when you:

study videos of someone else practicing your Skill

attempt a new trick and completely fail at it

practice as the sun rises

calculate probabilities

repeat a nonsensical word or phrase (that you are presumably using as a mnemonic device ICly) to yourself several times

catch something someone throws at you

drink the entire contents of a water bottle in one long gulp

You can combine this with an XP action, but you're not required to.

A New Perspective (Simplified) (25 XP)

This breakthrough is not such a big deal.

Major Goals: The HG can award you 5 XP towards this quest when:

you successfully come up with a setup or technique that allows you to perform what was previously an inconsistent trick consistently

you achieve a new personal best (distance? time? ELO? perfect replication of every note? whatever it is for your sport)

You can earn each bonus once, for a total of up to 10 XP.

Quest flavor: 1/chapter, you can earn a bonus XP for this quest when you:

practice in front of a mirror

write a checklist (following through with using it is optional)

carry an extremely heavy bag or backpack

ask for help

drink the entire contents of a water bottle in one long gulp

You can combine this with an XP action, but you're not required to.

Exhibition Match

Aspect 3/Shepherd 5/Storyteller 2

You attend a handful of events that are more about raising your profile than about serious competition. Often these are charity events. Sometimes you are involved in organizing or instigating them. Getting to these events is arduous, and the physical conditions under which you’re performing are not the greatest. But the energy of the crowd rooting for you keeps you going.

Exhibition Match (45 XP)

This one is for when you go traveling or touring.

Major Goals: The HG can award you 5 XP towards this quest when:

you physically meet someone you know from your Community for the very first time

you push yourself to appear and perform despite being sick (usually with a bad cold)

you warn the people watching you that this stunt has never been done in front of a crowd before because it is incredibly scary, chancy, and/or dangerous, do it, and somehow succeed

you set up your equipment or practice despite being in a space wildly unsuitable for it (such as hauling your GameCube and CRT monitor out on a camping trip, or having someone pass you your electric keyboard through a window while you dangle outside on ropes)

You can earn each bonus once, for a total of up to 20 XP.

Quest flavor: 1/chapter, you can earn a bonus XP for this quest when you:

take a long plane trip or bus ride

practice in front of a crowd

set up or practice in a place only somewhat unsuitable for it (such as doing a multi-hour running session on some random hotel treadmill, or hauling your thousand-piece wargame out onto the deck of a cruise ship)

eat junk food

connect with a stranger over your shared love of the Sport

are recognized by a slightly-too-adoring fan

have a bad dream about failing in front of everyone

use hand sanitizer

You can combine this with an XP action, but you're not required to.

Exhibition Match (Simplified) (25 XP)

For if you want less travel.

Major Goals: The HG can award you 5 XP towards this quest when:

you compete with someone from out of town

you spend a night on the couch of someone you originally met in your sport’s Community (e.g. staying for a night or two while traveling; having a sleepover; your home being temporarily inaccessible since it’s being fumigated)

You can earn each bonus once, for a total of up to 10 XP.

Quest flavor: 1/chapter, you can earn a bonus XP for this quest when you:

sit somewhere extremely uncomfortable

drink your third cup of coffee

solicit donations for a charity from friends

wear an embarrassing piece of clothing someone dared you to

have a bad dream about failing in front of everyone

You can combine this with an XP action, but you're not required to.

A Rivalry

Aspect 4/Shepherd 3/4/Storyteller 4

You compete seriously with someone else - someone so good that people half-jokingly wonder if maybe they sold their soul. (Or maybe they're just cheating with steroids or money or video editing, but you can't prove that. Not during this particular quest, anyway.) It is absolutely infuriating. It also drives you to heights of achievement that you have never before attained.

A Rivalry (45 XP)

This one is for when the rivalry is highly structured and has an audience and so on.

Major Goals: The HG can award you 5 XP towards this quest when:

you lose. No qualifiers. You weren’t at a major disadvantage like being injured or sleep-deprived, they weren’t visibly playing dirty, you just straight-up lose and acknowledge it as such.

you invent and demonstrate a technique or trick for your Sport that was previously thought impossible (such as a quintuple jump in ice skating)

your winning celebration is interrupted by a referee’s ruling that it didn’t actually count

someone from the Rival's end of your Community (insofar as there are different sub-social-circles in your Community in the first place) gives you insider information

You can earn each bonus once, for a total of up to 20 XP.

Quest flavor: 1/chapter, you can earn a bonus XP for this quest when you:

skip a barrier

have practiced so long through the night that you find you’re still doing so in the morning

wake up only a few minutes before practice is due to start, and have to rush to get ready

wander into a scene while talking to yourself about strategy

analyze footage/records of your Rival’s past performances for potential weaknesses

clean/maintain your equipment

stop in the middle of washing your face in the sink and stare up at yourself in the mirror, dripping wet

wipe sweat off your brow

You can combine this with an XP action, but you're not required to.

A Rivalry (Simplified) (30 XP)

This rivalry is more unofficial/informal.

Major Goals: The HG can award you 5 XP towards this quest when:

someone threatens to hurt you or ruin your reputation, but you don’t back down

you do something absurd to try to enhance your performance

you don’t show up at an event your rival shows up to, and they’re crowing about it

You can earn each bonus once, for a total of up to 15 XP.

Quest flavor: 1/chapter, you can earn a bonus XP for this quest when you:

crack nut shells with your teeth

wake up only a few minutes before practice is due to start, and have to rush to get ready

use a stopwatch or timer

clean/maintain your equipment

wipe sweat off your brow

shake someone's hand

You can combine this with an XP action, but you're not required to.

The Moments You Missed

Aspect 5/Shepherd 3/Storyteller 5

There is someone you haven't gotten to meet, or some part of your life that you lost, because you've been focusing so much on your sport. Maybe you receive an invitation to a family wedding that you had no idea was coming even though you should’ve figured it out. Maybe you had to miss your high school graduation. Maybe you realize that you hadn’t met your new niece for the entire first year of her life.

Perhaps you couldn’t have stopped for it. More likely you’d made the tradeoff knowingly, let it pass by for the sake of the Sport you love. How are you supposed to make up for something like that?

The Moments You Missed (30 XP)

This is the one where you go full-on doubting yourself.

Major Goals: The HG can award you 5 XP towards this quest when:

you construct a coherent story of how things could’ve gone differently, thinking through what other decisions you’d have made if you’d been less wrapped up in your Sport

you get sick in an ordinary, Sport-unrelated way

someone in your Community helps you out of a bad situation

You can earn each bonus once, for a total of up to 15 XP.

Quest flavor: 1/chapter, you can earn a bonus XP for this quest when you:

take an extremely, extremely long shower

fixate on how you could’ve done things differently

compare something in ordinary life to something in your Sport

make an extremely obvious mistake in your Sport that you should really have caught earlier

distract yourself from negative feelings by throwing yourself into your Sport instead

peel the shell off a hard-boiled egg

You can combine this with an XP action, but you're not required to.

The Moments You Missed (Simplified) (20 XP)

This is the one for when you have already gone through this a couple times, and have more or less made your peace with the fact that your Sport will make you miss things.

Major Goals: The HG can award you 5 XP towards this quest when:

you watch a home video of someone else’s major life event

a teacher, coach, and/or mentor retires, moves away, or otherwise exits your life permanently

You can earn each bonus once, for a total of up to 10 XP.

Quest flavor: 1/chapter, you can earn a bonus XP for this quest when you:

repair something

haul old toys or clothes to a donation center

do stretches

talk about what you "should" be doing

You can combine this with an XP action, but you're not required to.

[hlupdate]

The last of the One Direction lot to release his debut album, Louis Tomlinson took his time making his first full-length.

"It's taken me the best part of four years to finish it, so naturally, you know, there's a lot of heart in it," he considers, "a lot of emotion, a lot of honesty I think. And the most important thing for me, whenever I'm writing a song, is that the lyrics are really important to me. I just want to make people feel something, and through honesty, that becomes a little bit easier, you know? So I feel like, hopefully, I've made an honest and interesting record."

A lot has happened for Louis in the past ten years. He was catapulted into stardom as part of One Direction in 2010, left that group in 2015, returned to The X Factor in 2018 as a judge, became a footballer for a bit, had a child, and sadly lost his mother in 2016 and sister Felicité in 2019. A lot of those themes make it onto 'Walls', the latter forming the lyrics for the record's lead single 'Two Of Us'.

"Honesty and vulnerability at times is relatable, and it's important sometimes talk about certain things. I'm always conscious of being as transparent as I possibly can to my fans and to any listener."

Of course, his first solo ventures, 'Just Hold On' with Steve Aoki and 'Back To You' with Bebe Rexha and Digital Farm Animals, are miles away from the music he returned with in 2019, but he maintains the change of direction was for the best. "I just don't think that those songs are true to the artist that I want to be. Although they were right to me at the time, if you put them in the middle of this album, they would definitely stand out."

Where Harry's albums channel 70s rock and artsy pop, Niall's debut had the singer/songwriter vibe a la Sheeran and Capaldi, and Liam and Zayn opted for chart-friendly R&B pop, on 'Walls', Louis goes back to his roots, doing his best to emulate the Northern indie rockers he grew up on. "I feel like a lot of influence happens subconsciously. It's what you're listening to at the time or what you've grown up with. In terms of who I look up to, Alex Turner and the way that he writes as a lyricist is incredible, especially in the early Arctic Monkeys stuff. I always talk about Amy Winehouse's level of detail, again as a lyricist, and how descriptive she was was incredible. Obviously, I'm a massive, massive Oasis fan that goes without saying."

"Coming out of One Direction, it was a bit of improvising, a bit of trial and error"Louis Tomlinson

Chatting to Louis, it's easy to forget he was part of one of the biggest groups of all time, because he just comes across as a down to earth and, well, normal bloke. It's like seeing an old school friend in the pub and having a catch-up.

He's never lost his accent, and his dedication to his hometown of Doncaster is unmatched. He's returning to the Doncaster Dome on tour, was signed as a Doncaster Rovers player, and even in his early solo days, took Bebe Rexha to the Keepmoat Stadium for a video shoot.

"I always try and be as true to myself as I can. I've always been very aware of where I've come from, and very proud of where I've come from. I fuckin love Doncaster. My family still live there, I go there all't time, well, not all't time, but as much as I can. Those influences that I've grown up with were vital on my first album, they're definitely part of it's DNA.

"This was always where my heart lies. I mean, I spent most of my youth in Priory, back when it were ten quid all you could drink – which was fucking mint. That really pushed me towards big choruses and guitars, basically - you know, like a Catfish and the Bottlemen kinda record, that's the sound I really love."

Likening his experience of finding his feet after 1D's disbandment ("hiatus") to that of a brand new artist, it took Louis a while to get comfortable with the music he was making.

"A lot of developing artists when they first start their career, they spend two, three, maybe even five years in the background developing and waiting for that one moment, that one song, that one album. And I kind of had to live out that whole development period in the public eye. Naturally, after coming out of One Direction, it was a bit of improvising, a bit of trial and error and working out exactly who I should be as an artist. It took some time, I didn't want to rush it."

He did dip his toe into the songwriting waters during his time in 1D, if getting a writing credit on 37 of their songs counts as dipping a toe, but felt he needed time rediscovering himself.

"It was really important to me; it was only from the third album onwards that we really got trusted with having a real influence on the songwriting. It's something I'm really proud of, and they're definitely skills that have helped me in the solo career."

Funnily enough, One Direction's third album seemed to be the point where their music took a stadium rock-ish turn, which never really let up for the remainder of their career (see: 'Midnight Memories', 'Where Do Broken Hearts Go', 'Drag Me Down'). Maybe Louis always had those big choruses in him after all.

"I have the luxury of being a positive person"Louis Tomlinson

There are plenty of references to walls and fences on (aptly titled) 'Walls', which could easily be read as feeling like he needed to break out, but he says that's not necessarily what he means.

"I normally shy away from metaphor, but it was relevant in the song definitely. I'm sure that's how some people might interpret it. But it's more about general growth in life and any problems or mistakes that you make along the way. It's more about realising that, and I'm very proud of my One Direction roots, massively."

Strangely, he says joining One Direction humbled him. As a cocky teenager, being thrust into the spotlight and feeling like a small fish in a very large, Simon Cowell-controlled pond affected the boys in different ways.

"I was a bit of a show-off, really. I came into One Direction with a bit of an ego; I did think a lot of myself, I'm not gonna lie. It was quite a sobering experience. I was a bit of a show-off when I was a kid to be fair, like I love making people laugh and all that. I wasn't very hardworking. I'd say I'm hardworking now, but I definitely wasn't when I was a young lad."

And does he feel like he's changed much since finishing with the group five years ago?

"It feels like it did in One Direction, just a diluted version really. I'm lucky I still have a certain amount of hardcore fans who follow my every move. So in terms of the difference in like privacy and stuff, that hasn't really changed too much. But, you know, it is what it is. It's what I've signed up for, apparently."

It doesn't come across like the fame gets to him, perhaps in a way it has done in the past. He seems relaxed, confident, more candid than he was on any 1D press run (e.g., he's allowed to swear now), and like genuinely, despite everything, he's in a good place.

"I have the luxury of being a positive person and seeing the glass as half full. Whenever I reflect on those times of me feeling a little bit emotional, I always do see a light at the end of the tunnel. It's just extending that idea that you know, trying to induce hope."

Louis Tomlinson's album 'Walls' is out 31st January.

[gigili-jiggly]

can you list your favorite klance fics ://

(i’m not sure how to respond to your ‘ :// ‘ emoji, but i’ll take any excuse to gush about fics lol)

I have so many favorite fics, so I’ll just list some oneshots for now so that this list doesn’t become too long 

(I might post a list of more oneshots and ongoing fics if anyone is interested!)

SFW Oneshots: 

you’re lucky that’s what i like by @zenstrike

Lance rescues a hamster from certain doom.

or, Lance has Keith wrapped around his little finger and doesn’t even realize it.

This is literally the cutest and softest klance series I’ve read in a long time!! It gives me lots of feelings and feeds my need for lovestruck Keith ladfajdifjdsklf <33

hey, mom, i met a boy by @mothpoem

“Sweetheart,” says Lance, his hair longer, his shoulders broader, the slope of his nose uneven now where it didn’t used to be, “you don’t know the half of it.”

LISTEN. This fic owns my ass, it’s so good. It has all my favorite tropes (marriage proposals, visions of the future, love realizations, etc.) and every moment between Lance and Keith is so sweet and full of love hnnngh. 

i know what you did last summer by seventies

Saving angry, mysterious damsels in distress multiple times weren’t in the job description of being a lifeguard. It would have been slightly bearable if only everyone would stop asking Lance if he remembered what he did last summer. What really happened, anyway? AU

Pining Keith? Oblivious Lance? A little bit of Memory Loss? Heck yeah!!! This fic also made me laugh a lot, so I always reread this when I need a pick-me-up <33

this, our town of halloween by @tobiologist

“Yeah, well, it’s written all over both of your faces,” Lance hisses. “It’s not a big deal.”

Pidge taps her chin. “Oh, you mean Keith, the local introvert and your ex-rival, creeping out of his cave to go to a huge Halloween celebration with you and your little niece and nephew? Of course that’s not a big deal. Silly me!”

Or: Lance invites Keith to Disneyland on Halloween and glimpses an entirely new side of the boy he has a stupidly massive crush on.

Lately, I’ve been loving tropes where people go on a ‘date’, insist that it’s not a date and then finally realize it’s a date. Also, pining Lance is good shit. 

Smell as Sweet by ultimateparadox

Coffee and love, Lance thinks, are the only universal constants.

Established relationship!!! Marriage proposals!!! Becoming a family!!! Everything here is amazing!!!

Bastion by Foxcote

In a healing universe, Keith and Lance await the arrival of their daughter.

I am a sucker for klance as parents, and one scene in particular between Keith and Krolia really captured my heart <33

In every reality, I reach for you by @enlacinglineswrites

Stories inspired the Klance AU month prompts.

I love drabble series and this one right here has so many interesting and wonderful aus! I read it time and time again like a morning newspaper lol. 

Somewhere a Clock is Ticking by @emphasis-all-mine

This is a story about time travel, lost memories, growing up broken, ukulele lessons, peanut butter banana sandwiches, and a stuffed hippo named Patches.

This is also the story of how James Griffin saved the world, but couldn’t stop his parents from falling in love.

Literally the fic that made me warm up to James! I’ve always loved time travel stories and the characterizations in this fic is so fun and enjoyable, I hold it very close to my heart! Also, klance family aldjofiadjfdf

5 + 1 times: lance and the search for keith’s boyfriend by @starwar 

Who could it be?!

Lance tried to convince himself it wasn’t jealousy… it was just friendly concern. He had to ensure that whoever Keith was with treated him well, not that Keith needed Lance to look after him, but still, Keith deserved the world and Lance wanted to make sure whoever he was with gave that to him.

Just buddy-buddy concerns.

or alternatively; 5 + 1 times lance doesn’t realise he’s keith’s boyfriend

Oblivious Lance who doesn’t know he’s Keith’s boyfriend? Bet your ass I’m gonna read that!!

chaser of fate by freshia

Where Lance thinks everyone else is really frickin’ weird, the others spend copious amounts of time trying to get him to just remember, and Keith just wants to (re?)live his life.

(Modern Reincarnation AU where the biggest threat to face, is the looming deadlines for essays.)

One of the first klance fics I’ve read and one that I absolutely consider a classic. I love me some reincarnation au’s, and I love how this one is nice and not too angsty! 

Save the Date by @thathopelessromantic 

They had gotten married in the middle of a war, on an alien spaceship, both boasting major injuries. It was rushed and short and the team was thrust into battle almost immediately after “I do.” But afterwards, after some insistent questioning from Keith, Lance admitted to things he had let himself imagine for their wedding, were they to have had one on Earth.

Cute established and married klance celebrating their anniversary, what more can a girl want? 

Speak for the Stars by @speakswords 

All Lance has ever wanted is to prove his worth. So, maybe it’s fitting that the Black Lion picked him right when Lotor betrayed them and Shiro’s clone went rogue. Right when the team was at its lowest and closest to failing.

The desire for glory that Lance grew up with—that drove him to join the Garrison and pursue fighter class, that drove him into his one-sided rivalry with Keith, that drove him after Keith in the Sonoran Desert and into Blue’s cockpit and into space and into the war in the first place—it’s a relic of the past for him now. All he wants these days is to keep his friends alive and the Coalition afloat, and he tries his best, despite the pervasive fear that he isn’t the right person for this monumental task. Despite the growing certainty that Black picked the wrong guy.

This fear will be put to the ultimate test when the mess that ensnares the team after the clone disaster turns out to be a labyrinth more winding than any of them were prepared for. Because Lance might just be the only person equipped to lead them through this maze and into the light.

I love those tropes where peeps get stuck in their own dreams and someone has to help them snap out of it. This fic does this wonderfully with Lance and I loved Keith’s dream in here, it was so sweet <33

in every reality, we meet by ULTIOcean

Small one-shots about our favorite team, taken from a prompt list on tumblr for the October Writting Challenge, in which i’ll write 31 short stories, unrelated to each other, each insipred by the prompt of the day.

i adore this drabble series, each chapter is such a unique take on the prompt! 

you’ve got a hand for the taking (i’m about to take it to the moon) by seabear

“I think,” Lance says, squinting, “he’s a vampire.”

one of my comfort fics to be honest. i really really like their interactions here and the confession scene makes me very happy

where & how we’ll land by @ephemelody 

The first time Keith meets Lance is also the first time they kiss. It all goes downhill for him from there.

looking for a childhood klance fic that is so so good? this one is a classic!!!

Complete Mature/Explicit Oneshots: 

assemble by groovystars

‘there was an idea- katie and hunk know about it- called the voltron initiative. the plan was-is, god, it is- to bring together a group of remarkable people, and see if together they could become something more. to fight the battles we never could. i wasn’t sure though. just knew that katie and hunk could do it, maybe lance if he wasn’t knee-deep in cover work. but now that cap’s used to the century and keith kogane turned up from the dead, and we have a literal god on our hands… now- now i think we can do that. i think we can believe in heroes.’

aka the marvel au that’s probably already been done

As a huge Marvel fan, this is an amazing superhero au!! It has klance and shatt, as well as lotor and allura in a thor and loki dynamic! 

i like me better when i’m with you by @reader115 

His mother’s advice when the war is over? That he should ask for what he wants.

Keith joins Lance and his family on their farm, and Lance wishes for a never ending visit.

i’ve read so many post-canon fics when vld ended and this one is one of my absolute favorites. It’s because of this fic that i started associating the song with klance, haha! I love the characterizations and the overall sweetness/lovey dovey feeling the fic has and aldoifjaidfd I just love reading this over and over again <33

there are worse things i could do by @peachgrdn 

His chest went tight when he recalled Keith’s face. What did it have to mean? They’d never been lovers; that much was clear.

When Lance goes out to buy himself a gift for his own pleasure, it comes with a little emotional baggage. Only just as he thinks he can manage it, Keith throws himself into the mix, and Lance realizes he must come to terms with buried feelings.

honestly, i consider lyssy the queen for fluffy and feely smut lol. I love her humor in this one as well as the many feels it gives me…just aldkjodfa i love this fic a lot okay?

kiss me (like it hurts) by mottainai

Purple light streamed through his kitchen window from the neon sign across the street, getting tangled in Keith’s hair and painted on the planes of his shoulders. He held his breath, afraid to disturb the moment. Keith’s eyes were on his, too soft to be coming from a dangerous man. Lance could see himself becoming caught in the gap in his teeth, pressed into the groves of his calloused hands, inked across his ribs. It should terrify him, the kind of terror of one looking into the belly of the beast.

But it didn’t.

Or: Keith and Lance, told through arguments and resolutions

i’m such a sucker for gangster keith stuff and this fic here has one of my favorite takes on it. perfect for rereading again and again! 

lure by chaeriee 

Becoming indebted to Keith Kogane was not a part of Lance’s future plans. Falling for him, even less so.

another gangster keith fic and it has almost all of my guilty pleasures in it uwu. i love those /person A needs to pay off a debt and works for person B while unknowingly becoming the most important one to them’ storylines haha! 

 Alpha Affairs by marizousbooty

Keith and Lance take a romantic vacation to the mountains for a snowy weekend getaway.

vampire lance and werewolf keith….doing it….good stuff

Heaven in hiding by i_write_shakespeare_not_disney

Keith finds something interesting in Lance’s drawer and it leads to one of the most amazing nights of his life.

insecure lance in lingerie and keith helping him become comfortable with it? sexy. 

Beast of Burden by melancholymango

“Keith, no, we can’t go again.” Lance pleads fall on deaf ears. Keith is honed in on him now like predator to prey. He’s fighting a losing battle and they both know it. He sees it in the way Keith is raking his eyes over him, sizing him up. “We’ll be so late getting to the bar.”

“Just one more.” Keith insists, herding Lance toward the counter with a stubbornness that is innately wolf. Lance pouts, but he doesn’t have anywhere else to go but backward.

“That’s what you said last time! And the time before that!”

–

The week leading up to a supermoon, as told by the world’s best werewolf boyfriend, Lance McClain. The good, the bad, and the horny.

I read this on Halloween and I’m not even ashamed of how much I enjoyed this. This fic made me very very biased towards werewolf keith lol. 

[averygim]

hello all. you can call me cal or jeepers, which is my discord name and i think is funny tbh, but i mostly go by cal. my pronouns are they/them and ‘m in the est timezone. i’m a bit late to the game but i’m still v excited to introduce my child avery to ya’ll. below is a whole mass of text that’ll help you get to know this mess of a child. uwu it’s easiest to reach me on discord at jeepers creepers #5103, but i also try and respond as quick as i can to tumblr ims so it’s really whatever you prefer !!

basics

name: avery gim job: baker at peau d’amour age: twenty-five gender: cismale pronouns: he/him sexuality: grey-asexual / panromantic birthday: february 6th zodiac: aquarius personality type:  advocate | infj pinterest board: HERE

aesthetic

the haunting sound of a piano in a memory you can’t quite reach

a warm summer night spent watching fireflies dance among the trees

a bite of a fresh peach that leaves your mouth sticky and sweet

theme song: the 7th sense by nct u

hatred that will not go away and dreams that torture me the clock laughs at me, it does not give a single error i’m a mess, I don’t even know myself, my future is colored darkly i’m struggling, coloring this night even blacker in the irregularity that’s hard to understand there’s a story that’s deeply hidden eyes are being opened through this song your dreams are being read it’s being awakened from a deep sleep my seventh sense

positive & negative

affable ( adj ) : friendly, good-natured, or easy to talk to.

languid ( adj ) : (of a person, manner, or gesture) displaying or having a disinclination for physical exertion or effort; slow and relaxed.

versatile ( adj ) : able to adapt or be adapted to many different functions or activities.

candid ( adj ) :  truthful and straightforward; frank.

then

it begins when he’s four years old - this obsession in him. his parents couldn’t have expected that sending their son to piano lessons we enact such a wild passion in their small, quiet boy. it was hard to pick out at first. often, they would pick their child up from his lesson to find his small chubby cheeks stained with tears. his parents assumed he was simply being stubborn about learning the instrument. they would see the kids dragged to the lessons bemoaning their distaste to it to their parents and would tell each other “our boy is simply quiet with his dislike for it. he has never been a talker.” and  would keep taking him week after week. the piano teacher couldn’t enlighten them to what was going through their child’s mind in terms of why he seemed to work himself up into such a state. she explained to them that he seemed attentive whenever she would teach him and it was only until he started to practice on his own that the tears would begin. neither parties could get a word out of the child though he often seemed to calm fairly quickly post lesson, spending the car ride home pressing his small fingers into his thighs as though there was an invisible piano etched into his skin. at one point, his parents seemed to give in a bit to their uncertainty of how their child was doing, offering to take him out of the lessons. the aggressive shake of the four years old’s head and high squeaky voice insisting “ no, no !! “ was quite the surprise. it wasn’t until a year later, when he began to find his voice that he admitted to his piano teacher that he just loved piano so much, he couldn’t stop himself from crying whenever he got to play. the teacher passed this along to the parents with much amusement and relief.

the passion the young boy had for the instrument didn’t falter over the years, even as his peers turned to other extracurriculars and sports rather than the piano. his parents opted to get him a keyboard to set up in his room on his seventh birthday, still wary about how long he would remain content with the lessons. they had never enjoyed the instrument with such conviction when they were forced to take lessons growing up. it was, at least, comforting to know that their quiet child still enjoyed spending time doing kid things, such as playing outside, playing pretend and colouring. he even showed an interest in baking, which he often did with his grandmother, much to the disbelief of his father. still, he was a good child and despite the wariness his father had of allowing him to indulge in his more feminine hobbies ( he was very much stuck in the throws of toxic masculinity ), his mother and grandparents supported him fully in whatever he wanted to do. so during the week, he would go to his piano lessons and play with the neighbourhood kids outside. then, on the weekends, he would spend time with his mother’s parents, often baking some sort of treat with his grandmother and listening to his grandfather tell tall tales of his own childhood.

as he got older, his skill in piano progressed more and more. between his lessons and the studious way he practiced, he ended up participating in a variation of different concerts. by the time he reached his early teens, he was playing with the adult orchestra with nine years of lessons and experience under his belt. it was an astounding thing- to hear him play. it was as if this lazy, beautiful human was gifted with talent from the gods, but he wasn’t. he worked for his ability. countless hours pressing fingers into plastic keys. perhaps that is why, for his sixteenth birthday, his grandparents and parents pulled together the money to buy him a grand piano. it was then, upon walking into the home to find the piano gracing the room that used to be the den of their house, that he discovered he hadn’t quite outgrown his habit of crying when overwhelmed with emotion.

between creating compositions, practicing, baking with his grandma, and the hell that was high school, he didn’t have much time for anything else. he didn’t mind. he was content with his work, both with the piano and at school. he had a tendency to overwork himself within the confines of his piano room and bedroom between the two. this led to him developing a bad reputation of being a lazy and privileged individual who got away with sleeping in class. his peers saw him as someone favoured by teachers, when in truth it was simply because he’d had multiple discussions previously with them about being awake in class. many of them had agreed to let it slide so long as his grades were maintained. it was a necessary thing to seek as if his parents found out they would no doubt put restrictions on how he was working. 

despite the peer isolation, which later led to a fair amount of social awkwardness on his part, he seemed to get along great with those he went up against in competitions. perhaps it was their shared love or enjoyment of the instrument. regardless, he created a group of friends outside of the school scene and, despite many of them being older than him, he was respected and treated much better than others his age treated him. 

the summer post high school graduation saw him doing something no one could have predicted ( aside from his grandfather who swears up and down that he saw this coming since he was seven years old ). he set out on a tour of major cities, performing alone on a stage with simply a piano, a mask, and a single spotlight. see, in the latter years of his teens, he really blew up thanks to the internet. he became known under a moniker the he’d used on his youtube channel, which he would post videos of his personal compositions and covers of songs on. it led to some artists and producers reaching out collaborate, which, in turn, increased his popularity.

( car accident tw ) life was good for five years. he got to do what he loved and loved what he did. of course, all good things must come to an end, even if that good thing felt like it is your entire life. at twenty three, the now grown quiet boy got into a car accident. a drunk driver hit the car his mother was driving with him in the passenger seat. his mother survived with a few bruised ribs and a broken arm while he came out of it with severe head trauma. head trauma that, out of all things, resulted in hearing loss. the cochlea and hearing nerves in his inner ears were damaged to the point that it sounded like a hush fell over the world. it was a difficult reality to swallow. 

( depression tw ) it was a loss like no other. he could no longer hear his piano. he could no longer get lost in the world his music created. depression hit him heavy and hard, dragging him under in a suffocating hold. seventeen years. he’d been playing piano for seventeen years and now that ability was severely disabled. he withdrew, cutting ties with almost all of his friends who were apart of the music world. his parents didn’t know what to do with their quiet child who seemed to become deathly silent after the accident. the whole family had signed up in solidarity to learn asl alongside him. the only ones who seemed to muster out any sort of reactions or responses from him were his grandparents who struggled to learn the new way of communicating. he tried hearing aids in addition, however, the damaged required a more intensive solution. cochlear implants. he refused despite the struggle he still faced with the hearing aids. his family tried to get him to go through with the surgery, however he was an adult and it was his decision to make. so he continued to allow himself to waste away in the distorted world around him. his father responded to his state with anger, while his mother grieved and worried over him from afar. his grandparents were around as much as they could be, reaching out with patient hands. it would take two years for him to reach back.

twenty-four and feeling stuck, exhausted, and just down right sick, the quiet boy finally inched out of the shell the accident had left him in. it starts with therapy, then medication, and ends with stepping into the kitchen with his grandmother again. his piano remained untouched, gathering dust in his home behind a locked door. no one brought it up, not yet, and instead slow steps were eventually taken. he spoke for the first time post asl and hearing aids to his mother. his voice raspy and barely there from disuse. he couldn’t hear himself, but his mother had burst into tears as his grandparents smiled at each other with watery eyes. it was progress. slow progress, but they were glad that he was finally taking steps forward. 

it was five months after his twenty-fourth birthday that he decided to undergo the cochlear implant surgery. he held no hope for what he’d be able to do with the upgrade. he didn’t allow himself to think of the abandoned piano or the possibility of getting back into music. no, instead, he simply kept his eyes forward as though the past no longer existed. instead, he spent his time baking with his grandmother, helping with the small business she’d started when he was in middle school. the surgery was a success, but the quiet man did not cry when he was finally able to hear with more clarity. there were no tears of overwhelming happiness, instead he’d simply smiled at his mother when she asked if he could hear her and said yes.

it took him six months to decide he needed to move. despite his family still living in the area he grew up in, he needed to get away. he wanted out of the city and eventually settled on moving to beauhart, a place suggested by one of the few friends he kept in touch with post-accident. the official transition happened three months ago where he moved out of the apartment he bought for himself at twenty and into his own home. it was a bit large for just himself and his mother worried that he would fall back into bad habits, but he loved the old styled place. it had a front porch and was painted a gentle yellow. the front was filled with a garden of flowers and bushes that wrapped around to the fence that encased the backyard. his father hated it, but his grandparents had approved when they first saw it, having travelled with his mother to help with the unpacking once everything had arrived. it held more warmth than his apartment had. perhaps it was because he was going to be living in it full time or the character / personality the house itself had. regardless, he felt settled for the first time in almost two years. no one mentioned the grand piano that had been placed in the third bedroom of the house.

three months post move found him working at the local bakery. the early mornings were tough, but the consistency was enjoyable for him. it helped, significantly, with his mental health. he promised his mother to call at least twice a week and his grandmother almost every other day to gossip. despite his awkwardness with social cues and languid nature, he managed to make connections with other residents. things seemed to be looking up, though there still remained that empty part of him and a door unopened.

extras

he is, for all intents and purposes, socially an idiot. he can’t pick up verbal cues up very well and often chooses to ignore them even if they are glaringly obvious. some kind find this incredibly annoying or be endeared by it. usually it’s the former, though avery has never minded. he has no desire to be liked by everyone and is more than happy to continue going by the beat of his own drum.

definitely often produces the wrong first impressions, especially with his looks. he takes care of himself, has been instilled with the habit, especially after how rough his twenty-third and fourth year was. so it’s not often he goes out looking like the drowned rat he enjoys being at home. it’s part of his routine that has helped him stay on track mentally.

definitely a momma’s boy, but would literally do anything for his grandparents. he is planning on having them visiting him as soon as he manages to get his guest room furnished and decorated. 

 if he wants to avoid something, he ignores it. it’s a terrible coping habit that manifests in small instances and larger situations. it’s very childish in many ways, but his therapist has yet to be able to break him out of it. 

is looking into adopting an animal, but is torn between what sort of animal. he has been looking at the humane society, but has yet been able to decide.

he is very indecisive about the smallest of things, but somehow manages to be able to make the bigger and more important decisions ??? 

has a very weird and varied taste in music.

 learned korean from his grandparents when he was younger but primarily speaks english or asl. 

often moves around his house without his hearing aids and keeps things quiet. a book nerd post accident. his favourite thing to do is spend the day on his porch swing reading.

he has been thinking of taking online business courses to learn more about running/owning his own business. he hasn’t mentioned it to anyone, not is planning to, but when he thinks about the future he’s wondering if owning his own bakery could be a possible option.

honestly a sleepy boy even though he has a perfectly reasonable sleep schedule ???

doesn’t know how to flirt. doesn’t even know how to hold a conversation with someone he has a crush on. is very awkward with them.

likes to try and make wacky things (baking wise) when bored then try and make you try it without any forewarning. 

is actually pretty good at making elaborate cakes and frosting designs. does cake commissions on the side for birthdays, in fact.

gets lost really easily. its been three months and he still sometimes forgets where to turn when driving home.

will steal your pet if you leave him alone with them ( not literally ).

is terrible at texting and is the type of person to call you to have a conversation. this is mostly because he’s too lazy to text.

enjoys memes and quotes them sarcastically, sometimes when it’s definitely not appropriate.

has a habit of staring without meaning too. this could either be off into space or actually at someone. he doesn’t necessarily mean to do it. at times it’s a case of dissociation and others it’s simply him having no common sense and/or is blatant day dreaming.

will not ride as a passenger in a car. he’s been able to drive again post implants but the trauma of the accident has caused him a real fear of being someone else’s passenger. 

sometimes, without him realizing it, he’ll mime playing the piano. the habit of pressing his fingers into invisible keys too engrained to erase. he attempts to avoid music a lot, especially classical. it’s somewhat impossible to do at work and outside of his home. at times, he gives in to his desire to try and hear it the way he used to and will blast the music until he can feel the base thrumming in his veins. it’s as detoxing as it is frustrating. as much as he can hear, it will never be like it used to be for him.

if you read all of this i applaud you. tell me your favourite colour, animal, and/or food and then we can plot C:<

[spirit-of-the-void]

Ebony and Ivory (V x Reader) Chapter 4

Author’s notes: You guys are great, thanks as always for the support. A word of warning, this chapter has scenes with anxiety and panic. So if you have issues reading such things, there’s some caution there.

Chapter 4

You made it to the warehouse without incident, Griffon perched and ready on your shoulders and V walking in step with you as you went. The building had long been cleared out, dust settling on the floors and a set of doors broken off its hinges. You realized with some surprise that it was getting a lot cooler outside now that night was falling, probably due to it being the earlier days of summer. It was probably around sixty degrees when your group made it in, searching for a good place to sit and rest your weary bones. You leaned against a pillar as V sent Shadow to search around, eyes wandering over to abandoned crates and pallets left behind. Luckily, there were none of those husk-corpses in here—you appreciated that. They were far too macabre for you to sit and sleep next to.  

You closed your eyes as you waited, passing the seconds by humming a light tune. You could feel V’s gaze on you occasionally—you didn’t have to look at him to tell he was still worried. He kept tapping his cane lightly, sometimes in rhythm with the song you hummed. Griffon was sitting on V’s shoulders now, keeping an eye on you regardless. You felt bad, he was supposed to look after his master and was spending more time worrying about you. Although V didn’t seem to mind, or at least he hadn’t said anything yet about it. You hoped it wasn’t secretly bothering him, or at least you hoped that if it was, he’d say something and it could be worked through.

Regardless, Shadow came back moments later, announcing its presence with a low growl and a flick of its tail. V stood up from the pallets he found for you and he to sit on, holding out a hand to help you up again. Gratefully, you accepted it when lightheadedness hit you again. You would have summoned food to help, but that expended more energy. You would just have to rest and wait again, spend some time under the moon and recharge. The energy of the Void came back fairly quick, but after extending like you had your body had to repair some of the damage. You felt kind of bad, like you were holding back the group in some way. Mind you, the plan had already been to rest for the night, but you didn't like worrying others.  

Shadow lead your group into what looked to be an abandoned office of sorts. There was a desk with a long-forgotten laptop, a personal cot on the far side, half facing the door with two tables on their side.  There also seemed to be a mini fridge and what looked to be a coffee and snack station next to a utility closet. Much to your relief, there were a few candy bars and other things left behind to eat if hungry. As you sat down at the desk, V tested the light switch, letting out a soft noise of surprise when the lights still turned on. How this place still had power, you would never know—if you put any thought in you would have reasoned that there may have been backup generators or a remaining power grid still working somewhere. Instead, you tiredly laid your head on your arms, releasing a sigh now that you no longer had to stand.

Griffon landed on the desk next to your head, letting out a low snicker as you slowly looked at him, “Ohh you’re looking like shit there, Girlie. Didn’t your daddy ever tell you to stretch before working out?”

You let out a low, neutral hum, tapping your fingers on the desk as you replied, “I don’t remember my parents, so let’s go with no.” Not a lie. After selling your soul, a lot of your old memories were taken to help you cope with trauma. You only got back random bits and pieces at intervals undecided by you. The Deity only let you remember what he felt was appropriate at any given moment. Honestly, it didn't bother you. Making new memories along the way, looking forward and not back. At least...that’s what you were trying to do.

Griffon let out a low whistle, fluttering his tail as he tilted his head at you, “Shit, you may be more depressing than Shakespeare over there, toots. Got any more skeletons in the closet? Ever kill a guy? Witness murder? Were you left on a doorstep at a ripe age of a day old?”

You rose a single brow, saying in an amused tone, “You’ve got quite the imagination on you, Griffon.”

He snickered lightly, which made you smile a bit through the exhaustion. You liked the banter you and the bird could share, now at least where it was on friendly terms. You thought you saw V smirk as well in his pursuit to get the utility closet open, seeming to grow ever so slightly frustrated. You watched with quiet interest as he gestured to Shadow, the creature extending a single spike forward to break the lock. You giggled a bit, looking away before he could see you entering your final level of tired. Which happened to be insanity. You were getting tired to the point you were getting giggly, pressing your face into your arms with a low groan at yourself. Sleep was definitely a need now, but you were trying to will yourself to eat first.

Then there was the sleeping situation. There was a single cot in this room with one pillow. The idea of snuggling up to V after hanging out with him for a half a day wasn't the worst idea, but you didn’t want him to be uncomfortable. Intimacy with people you barely knew was kind of strange. And no matter how you tried to slice it, laying on a cot that small with a lanky man would be very up close and personal for knowing him for half a day. But there was that annoying, touch-starved part of your brain, aching for contact of any sort. You were pretty sure that wasn’t a good thing, considering your impulse control being what it was—mind you, your brain knew well enough not to touch people without permission.  

You were more so afraid of bursting into tears or something over small things. Or laughing fits.

“You should eat something,” V’s voice pulled you out of your musings, making your shoulders jerk as you looked up at him. He was still smiling, eyes dark in the dimly lit room as he tossed what looked to be a peanut bar at you, “You need to regain your strength in whatever way you can, right?”

You felt like he was mocking your food quotes from earlier. You frowned, eyeing the generic bar of food with skeptical eyes, “You should practice what you preach, pretty boy.”

Humoring you, he plucked another bar from the tray of snacks. Like a good boy.

Brow raised, he very obediently took a bite, chewed, and swallowed. You fought another laugh that threatened to burst out, opening your own snack with a shake of your head. You hoped he knew you were going to eat no matter what, but you were glad he was at least complying with your demands and eating himself. You looked at Griffon apologetically as you chewed the sweet and salty treat, realizing for the time being you couldn’t conjure up any snacks for him and Shadow. Did they need to eat, or was it just for the sake of enjoying food? You were pretty unsure on that, but you reminded yourself to ask at another time that wasn't then.  

You saw Shadow come out of the closet with a spare pillow in its mouth, staring at you with glowing red eyes. You let out a sigh of relief, finishing the food quickly. A pillow was definitely good enough for you—You had slept on the floor before. You were starting to feel less fatigued already, but you were still so tired that you were sure as soon as your head hit that pillow you would be dead to the world. On the flipside, you were sad this room had everything but a god damn shower. That’s what you were aching for the most, the feeling of hot water and good shampoo. Especially considering fighting left you feeling a little grimy and gross.

Giving Griffon’s beak a little pat, you stood up from the chair, stretching as far as your body would allow. The food was definitely helping, but sleep was a definite need. The dizziness was now gone, but the feeling of being stretched too thin was not. Some sleep would definitely help with that.

But much to your surprise, V was already taking the pillow from Shadow, putting it on the cot next to the already present one. You blinked, rubbing some of the tiredness from your eyes as he sat on the simple bed, removing his sandals. You felt some strange surprise upon seeing him remove the things—for some reason you expected them to keep his shoes on. Even more weird, seeing his feet without them felt very scandalous. Further proof you were losing your mind.  

“V,” You yawned, deciding to go with the flow and sitting on the other side of the cot to remove your own shoes, “Why do you wear sandals?”

He seemed amused by the question, tilting his head back to level his jade eyes at you as he replied, “Is that your foot fetish speaking?”

You huffed at that, crossing your arms over your chest, “It was a hand fetish, get it right.”  

“Ah yes, a hand fetish,” He chuckled at your response, lifting a hand so he could wiggle his fingers a bit. The action sent his ring glinting in the low light, seeming almost mesmerizing in your tired state, “And I apologize—I don’t wear the sandals for any particular reason.”

You let out a low, tired hum, pulling off a combat boot and tossing it to the other side of the room unceremoniously. You would keep the thigh highs on at least, since they covered your feet and kept them warm. Then again, you had slept in those boots before too.

“Do my questions bother you?” You asked, yawning again as you again debated where to finally lie yourself down. You’d spoon with the goth if he was cool with it, but guessing by Griffon’s taunts and jibes there would be no chance of not being made fun of the next day. Speaking of the bird, he was watching you both from across the room, eyes ever intent and filled with mirth. Like he was watching a play and the climax was about to unfold. You tried not to focus on him, instead waiting for V to answer your question.  

“I don’t believe I said that,” V replied in a low murmur, almost sultry, leaning back on his side and facing the door in one fluid motion, “More questions can be asked...tomorrow. For now, you can use some rest.”  

Your mind went racing at the implications of his actions, but out of your mouth came, “Aww no sweet poetry to help me slumber? No bed time stories?”You didn’t actual want either of those things, but your brain was trying to come up something witty to say.

He let out another low chuckle, hand sliding off the cot to pick his book off the floor, "Lie down and maybe we can compromise." His tone was so soft and lilting, coaxing and suggestive at the same time. How were you supposed to ignore a request like that?

His wiry frame took up exactly half of the cot, feet hanging off the edge slightly. His pretty black hair sure was a stark contrast to the pillow, and something about the sight of it sent your heart racing like a caged bird. You were a complete idiot, an easily excitable idiot. You didn’t want to make anything uncomfortable, but V seemed fine with the situation--either that or he was oblivious to it. You found yourself smiling, deciding to just go with the flow. Both of you seemed to be way to stubborn to ask the other about the sleeping situation, and if he was fine by it then so were you. The idea of him reading sweet poetry while you both shared a bed...maybe that was your true kink.

Willing your heartbeat to slow, you stretched once more, leaning to the side so your head hit the pillow of the cot. A sigh left you as soon as your face touched the cool fabric, tired body fully relieved now that you were horizontal. The energy of the Void settled to a low rumble, body instinctively curling up a bit as you wrapped your arms under the pillow. Thus, began recovery time, which you were desperately trying to focus on. That was short lived, considering any movement lead you to touching the goth behind you. Your back aligned with V’s as soon as you did, you immediately taking a deep breath to stop yourself from jerking away in surprise. Focus on sleep now, focus on feeling nervous at another time.  

You thought you head V let out a slow breath, his back relaxing ever so slightly against yours as the quiet seconds began to tick by. He flipped to a page in his book, a low hum coming from his mouth as he decided on what to read.  

When he spoke, his voice was soft and sultry, soothing to you in small space.  

“Oft when the summer sleeps among the trees,

Whispering faint murmurs to the scanty breeze,  

I walk the village round; if at her side  

A youth doth walk in stolen joy and pride—”

You recognized this poem. It was the same one he was speaking when you first saw him earlier in the day. It also ignited an older memory in you, one that made your body relax gently and eyes close. A memory of the sun flitting though bright green tree branches, of flower petals falling from blooming buds. Of laughter, the only laughter you could remember from that time. Sleep was already gripping you, heavy and heady as the Void’s embrace. Still V continued to quietly read, voice melodic and smooth.

“I curse my stars in bitter grief and woe,  

That made my love so high and me so low.”

You thought you heard Griffon chuckle very quietly, settling himself on the desk to rest for the night. The soft padding of Shadow’s feet followed, stopping near the door. You were sure if you looked, you’d see the big cat curled up to make sure no one and nothing came through. The guard for the night, one you were sure no one would mess with. In that moment you felt very safe and content, toes curling into the cot and letting the sleep V was bringing  slowly starting to take you over.

But as you fell asleep, your subconscious mind realized so many things. Things you were sure you’d feel things about upon waking, if you could remember them.

Had you put any thought into it, you would have realized V made sure earlier to put himself in harm's way to protect you.  

“O should she e'er prove false, his limbs I'd tear—”

Had you put thought into it, you would have realized he tried to put himself before you so you wouldn’t have to take the brunt of hitting the ground.  

“And throw all pity on the burning air—”

You would have realized he put himself on that side of the cot so he was facing the door—insuring that if anything burst through the door to attack, he’d get hit first, and not you.

“I'd curse bright fortune for my mixed lot—”

Had you put any thought into it, you would have realized he was just as lonely, touch-starved, and tired as you.

“And then I'd die in peace, and be forgot.”

But instead, sleep claimed you.

(V’s POV)

When he finished the final line of his poem, he could tell you were already asleep.  

Your breathing was slow and even behind him, shoulders brushing his with each breath. He turned slightly to look at you, making sure not to jostle the cot too much. You made very little sound during sleep, pale blonde hair spilling over the pillow in a sharp contrast to the black of his own. Like Ivory over ebony. V released a breath, closing the book quietly and setting it on the floor next to the cot. He found himself oddly content, and he couldn’t quite place why. He had known you for half a day, hours at most. Yet you already felt like you belonged to their little group, like a missing puzzle piece he wasn’t aware was missing. He pressed a hand to his head, thoughts drifting as he went over all that had happened.

For once in the past month, he had felt...relieved. Energized. Like he was...complete. Whenever you shared your energy with him, it removed so many layers of pain. He could never bring himself to ask you for it, especially after knowing you for such a short time. But you seemed happy, downright eager to help, to relieve his pain, to worry about him. No one had done that for him before, not in any of his memories.

The image of you, smiling and saying you would look out for him, left a hollow feeling in his chest. He closed his eyes, the realization of how much he craved in reality a heavy burden. The years of neglect had caught up with him, and even he wasn’t aware of the extent until now. No one ever worried if he was in pain, fatigued, or unhappy before. He was unsure how to handle it, what to do or say. Even before you shared your energy, there was something about you that made him feel incredibly light—you brought an optimism to an otherwise dismal situation, one he had been content with dealing with alone...until now.

Yet there was an uncertainty there. Until that moment, he had been driven in his task. Focused, yearning for the deed to be done. You, in just a day, made him forget for brief moments what he was meant to do. His focus waned, his inner torment forgotten in brief spurts of laughter, sometimes joy. The task still remained despite the small moments of peace; he knew that without doubt. The levity remained, and that was always important. But...how was he supposed to react when being around you made him feel...

He couldn’t think about that. But was he not allowed to find happiness wherever he could get it? He squeezed a hand to his chest at the thought, hating himself and all the thought implied. To do what he wished and still remain on the task...It didn’t just involve him anymore, not just his happiness. And that wasn’t fair.

He wasn’t sure what to do.

As if sensing his thoughts, Griffon let out a low snicker, causing V to open his eyes once more.

“Ohhh but you’ve got it bad too, dontcha lover boy?” He mused, sounding absolutely delighted, “You two have spent less than a day together, mere fucking hours, and look at how bad you are. Honestly what am I going to do with you?”

V tilted his gaze, a half smile on his lips as he replied, “You’re very presumptuous, Griffon.” He was, unfortunately, right about V. But as for you...he shouldn’t assume your kindness translated into attraction. And neither should V.

Griffon scoffed, shaking out his feathers as he flung back, “Don’t give me that bullshit, V. I know you too well, remember that,” He pointed a talon at your sleeping figure, eyes glinting the light in the room as he purred smugly, “You’re like a little boy with his first crush. Didn’t take you for the hopeless romantic type.”

“Griffon.” V’s voice held slight warning, eyes narrowing a bit on the bird.

“Loosen the jock strap, lover boy,” Griffon snickered, “Just pointing out the obvious. Why not go for it? Trust me my special eyes see all, I'd definitely be your wing man.” He let out a low chortle at his own joke, one that made V internally sigh.  

“You know why.” V replied simply, not elaborating or explaining. He didn’t have to—Griffon knew damn well what he meant.  

That made the bird pause, a few blessedly quiet moments ticking by while he thought over what V said.

“Well shit, if it's meant to happen it’ll happen, right?” Griffon finally spoke, voice very matter-of-fact, “Fate and all that sappy shit. No use fighting it, or avoiding it. That garbage just makes it worse.”

V let out a quiet laugh, determined not to wake you.

“Why, Griffon,” He said in mock surprised, “I didn’t take you for a believer of fate.”

The bird responded with a mere snort, head rolling back a little bit as he huffed, “Not really, but I do believe in humans and their stupid fucking chemistry. And hormones. If your bits are compatible with her bits then there’s no use running from—”

“Griffon.” V’s tone implied violence if the demon didn’t end that line of thought where it started. He definitely couldn’t think about that in that moment.

Griffon let out an amused hum, eyes practically twinkling with delight.

“Are you blushing, Shakespeare? I think you are,” He immediately backed down when V raised his book threateningly, with intent to throw, “Alright alright, jeez. Don’t get your panties in a twist there. I’m just spitting the truth at you, mister poet."

V closed his eyes again, trying to focus on sleep as he replied, “Our only truth is the task at hand, and the burden of completing it.” His thoughts could wait, the wondering could wait. In a way, what Griffon spoke was true. If things were meant to happen, they would—he knew there was no fighting that. That aching sense of grief he carried wouldn’t go away, like he was mourning something already that he hadn’t yet lost. He focused on the sound of you breathing again, trying to align his own breaths with yours. Griffon let out another low chuckle, almost akin to a sigh, and reached out with a claw to turn off the lights. Now in the dark and calm, V tried to will himself into a peaceful sleep, despite knowing he hadn’t had one in a long, long time.

And for once, he just might get one.

(Your POV)

“Pain is a reminder, one you should heed.”

Agony filled your lungs, filling you to the brim. You writhed, breathing glass shards that ripped apart your throat all the way down your chest. Your screaming made no sound, hands clawing at nothingness. Everything was nothingness. Your eyes saw the dark, skin so cold and body so numb. And yet you still felt pain, you felt it everywhere. You drifted in a sea of burning sand, and the sand was eating you alive. You hadn’t felt this pain a single day in your mortal life, not this physically. But somehow, this pain was welcome. Stripping away your torment, your memories, replacing it with fire and ash. And the cold, so very cold.  

His hands held your face, though you couldn’t see him. His breath smelled of the dark, of all the icy nothingness. You could feel it from everywhere. His nails dug into your skin, but his voice was so gentle.  

“Little sparrow, destined to sample the fruits of happiness,” He whispered in your ears, inside your head, your soul, “And to never be full of them.”

They took your happiness. It never stayed. It was always taken away.

You screamed silently again when the burn flared more, razing you to ash. Surely you were burning, this cold fire was burning you. You felt his hands on your neck, on your legs, on your arms. Each part of you touched was another part scorched. Razors cutting out from your own skin, yet you felt no blood. Your bones never broke, but throbbed with agony. You couldn’t remember anymore, didn’t want to remember anymore.

“Pain is a reminder that you are alive,” He whispered again, voice all that reached you in the sea of torment, “A reminder of the gift I have given you.”

You thrashed in his hands, wailing with fear and grief. Grief that had no weight, no meaning, no purpose. You couldn’t remember what you were mourning, but that grief was there. You wanted to be a clean slate. You decided on this pain, it was yours to keep—the truth, and an escape from that mortal pain.

This was your choice.

After all choices had been taken from you.

His lips brushed your ear, whispering those forsaken words to you, “You are overflowing with emotions in a glass too full.”

Were you? You could hardly remember anymore, couldn’t remember feeling pain twice as much, the loss twice as much, the ache twice as much.

“To fix you, I will remove your excess, and make the glass bigger.”

If your fate was only ever taste happiness, then have it snatched away, you would go kicking and screaming into the night. You accepted the pain and the burn, hands curling into fists as you let yourself submit. You were a mold meant to be shaped, a blank canvas to be painted on, a lost soul to be saved. A soul to be sold, damned in servitude for a taste of some ironic freedom from fate.

Eyes wide and staring, crying tears that refused to be shed, you stared into the Void.

And it stared back.

You awoke from your dream with a heavy gasp, one you immediately stifled with your own hands.

Your breaths were heaving in panic, eyes wide and searching the dark room as you sat up from the cot. It was still night. It was the same room you fell asleep in. You were safe.  

You desperately tried to will your breaths to slow, hands shaking as you brought them down from your mouth. The panic had begun to make them go numb, prickling like needles were gently piercing your skin. You had to calm down, it was just a dream. A long, broken memory from the past—something worth forgetting. You leaned forward and rested your head in your hands, wishing you knew what time it was in the night at the very least. A brief glance at V confirmed he was still asleep, and you thanked god for that at least. You tried to focus on grounding yourself in reality again, counting breaths, griping the cot so hard it hurt. Pain would remind you that you were awake.  

Pain is a reminder that you are alive.

You squeezed your eyes shut, desperate not to cry because you knew once it started you wouldn’t be able to stop. It had been a while since you had a dream like that, since you relived that memory. Of when you died, and were found in the Void. When he chose you, and gave you the gift of his “Blessing.” That was such a long time ago, something you were determined to bury and move on from. But it always returned, and always when you least expected it. Sending you spiraling back into vulnerability, into panic and anxiety. It was not welcome.

It was never welcome. But it always reminded you.

As you sat and tried to calm the racing panic, you heard the soft, familiar pap of footsteps. Shadow, you realized right away. You heard them approaching you, then saw their glowing eyes and pelt a moment later. You held your shaking hands in your lap, trying to calm yourself as they watched you with unblinking eyes and tail swishing back and forth. Barely visible in the dark, but you could see it. You couldn't focus on them in that moment, with each passing second the panic from your dream threatened to come back. You closed your eyes again, feeling tears burn and threatening to spill. You couldn’t cry, you refused. A sob was stuck in your throat, clawing for release, but you couldn’t wake up V. You wanted him to think you were strong. You wanted to be useful to him. Your nails dug into your wrist so hard you were sure you bled, but you couldn’t stop yourself.

Pain is a reminder.  

Just as you were afraid of breaking down, on the very cusp of bursting into tears, something surprised you.  

You heard the soft footfalls of Shadow drawing closer again, and a second later felt their breath on your fingers. Your eyes opened, a couple stray tears tracking down your cheeks as you met Shadow's gaze, the mighty beast letting out a soft noise at you as it leaned its head forward and let it plop softly onto your lap.  

You felt your breath catch in surprise, shaking hands stopping in their pursuit to hurt yourself and instead gently cupping the cat’s head, stroking over the soft feeling of its fur and ears. Shadow released a low huff, closing its eyes as you found your comfort in that moment. The feeling of its fur, the warmth it gave, and the solidity of its weight on your lap was enough to slowly start grounding you in reality. A soft smile formed on your lips, eyes have closed as you stroked Shadow’s snout to their ears, finding that satisfaction you had been craving all day with the cat. Strangely enough, you were glad they caved now, in this moment, right when you needed it most. A little joy, a little victory, made real and easy to cherish. Your heart rate began to slow, pain in your chest easing, and the shaking in your hands finally ceasing entirely.

As soon as the shaking left, Shadow began to purr. A low, deep rumble of sound as the cat rubbed its mighty head into your hands. You could have almost cried of happiness then, scratching both sides of its head and letting out a pleased sigh. This was a perfect way to forget, to remind you of what moment you were in. With Shadow’s help, the lingering dream settled to a dull roar, mind trying to focus on the soft feeling of Shadow’s fur.  

You heard the soft flap of wings a second later, the bed shifting slightly when the bird landed to your left. He was more visible in the dark, glowing with a light blue along his wings and beak. His eyes landed on you as well, voice uncharacteristically quiet in the small space, a welcome thing in that moment of vulnerability. You felt bad though—you hoped you hadn’t woken him up.

“You okay, girlie?” He whispered, tapping your shoulder with his beak.

You nodded at his question, continuing to stroke the panther’s head resting in your lap. Griffon’s concern was welcoming, and only sought to warm you further from the cold of the Void.

“I’m okay,” “You whispered back, quickly looking behind you to confirm V was still asleep. He looked...peaceful. And soft. Lips slightly parted, hair draping over his face and usual smiling expression gone. Replaced with a gentle expression of rest. You looked away before you lost yourself, letting out a slow, relieved breath as you continued, “It was a nightmare. That’s all.”

You were okay. You had to be. You had to be strong.

You heard Griffon shuffle closer, letting out a very quiet trill as he looked at Shadow indulging themselves quietly.

“Look who’s finally turned around,” He snickered, earning him a grunt from the mighty beast, “About time. And don’t mind Shakespeare, toots. He’s sleeping like the dead, probably ‘cause the dumb bastard never actually takes consistent, normal rests.”

You found yourself smiling in the dark at Griffon’s mocking. Somehow, it was just as comforting as Shadow’s purring.  

“I'm glad he’s resting,” You murmured, “He deserves rest.”

“So do you, girlie,” Griffon countered, leaning down and resting his head on your arm, “Go back to sleep. Don’t be a dumbass like the poet, I can’t deal with two dumbasses.”

You shook your head, but still yawned despite your best efforts. You were fucking exhausted; you couldn’t deny that. But you were scared of going back to sleep, scared of dreaming like that again. Although, in your experience, those things never happened in twos—you didn’t want to take that chance. Still, you could feel the exhaustion still there, your energy only half replenished by your short rest. If you stayed up, you’d be tired when you needed to be focused the next day. You couldn’t risk that either. Fear and necessity were splitting you in two, and you hated that quite a bit.

Griffon seemed to sense your racing thoughts, letting out an exasperated sigh as he shook out his feathers.

“How about this, toots?” He said in a tone that implied annoyance, but without any heat, “Me and the overgrown house cat will stay with you, how about that?”

You found yourself smiling again despite yourself, continuing to stroke Shadow's fur with both hands.

“This cot is pretty small,” Your voice sounded tiny, vulnerable. There was no hiding how much you actually wanted that to happen when you were that god damn obvious, “We can’t wake up V.”

Griffon scoffed, nudging your elbow with his beak, "We'll make it work. Now lie your ass down before I start squawking up and storm and purposely wake pretty boy up, see what he says.”

You couldn’t really argue with a threat like that, letting out a light sigh.  

Carefully, as not to jostle the cot, you lied back down, resting your head on the cool pillow. Shadow immediately huffed, hoping up on the bed right between your legs. You curled up a leg, letting the mighty cat rest its front half there on your thigh as the other half of its body curled around your feet and V’s. Its head snuffed in between your arms, beginning to purr again when you cradled them to your chest. They rolled onto their back a bit, paws curled against their chest akin to a normal house cat. They were so soft, so warm, and so very welcome. Sure, the bed was cramped, but you wouldn’t have it any other way.

Griffon contented himself with curling up on the pillow over your head. Beak resting by your face, tail wrapping around the top of V’s head. He let out a quiet, exasperated huff, wings tucked comfortably against his side as he watched you close your eyes, comfortable and contented. Your touch-starved, affection craving body had never been so relieved. The big cat cradled against your front, V back to back with you, and Griffon tucked against your head. If you thought you felt safe before, you felt downright invincible now. Protected, for once in your life, and happy enough that sleep could start to claim you again. V breathing behind you, Griffon above you, and Shadow purring below made a comforting chorus for your ears, washing away any traces of that dream and forcing restfulness.

As your concentration drifted again, you thought you heard Griffon sigh happily, mumbling without any anger.

“What am I gonna do with you two idiots?”

Read on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18136193/chapters/42910745

Tagged: @silentwhispofhope @just-call-me-no-name @nightshadow4713 @slightlylunatic @efiicitia