#.........what about jolene

[rcseadorned]

pov: u go to her house, she asks if you want something to drink, you say yes and a few minutes later this comes out to deliver your drink

[catpriciousmarjara]

"....and here we have the image of the Terran deity of truth, Eycha-Bomba-ur-Guy, not be confused with the deity Bomb-ur, the god of abundance from the ancient Tolki-eena religion, which predates the Utubar religion entirely. Archeological excavations of the primitive holo-relics of Terra dates the Utubar religion to the two kingdoms period of the Amaz-U-na, and App-le-ple empires, in the Memetiscan era.

As stated before Eycha-Bomba-ur-Guy is a deity of truth and religious texts proclaim that he emerges whenever the principles of truth are violated. The legends we have been able to uncover from the ruins of Terra talks of a well where he is supposed to reside in and that every terran year he appears unexpectedly in order to shame the liars seeking fortune in the Holos of the kingdom of Utuba in a ruthless public sermon.

(Unfortunately we have not been able to uncover physical evidence of the kingdom as of now. Much of the information we have on the Utuba come from the Utuba Com-men-tits, the famous historical document that confirmed the theory that the Utuba people, consisting of the mortal Viu-wah, the priestly Saab-scriba, and godly Cree-atar, recorded history collectively.)

In his endeavor to champion truth Eycha-Bomba-ur-Guy is confronted by many adversaries and we can see how these battles play out in the religious iconography of the period. One of his many opponents is Tomm-y-Tallaar-ico, a rather comical figure who relentlessly takes credit for the achievements of others' and boasts about it throughout Terra. Some scholars believe him to be a fictional figure created to warn children to stay away from lying and boasting, especially because the Utuba Com-men-tits records one of the claims made by the minor deity as his mother being proud of him, which by the very nature of the deity is implied to be a false claim.

(Parental figures and their approval seems to be very important to the Terrans. Scholars have found multiple worshipful holos with terms such as Daddy, Zaddy, Mother, Mommy, and Muscle Mommy as evidence to this theory. Deviant behaviour seems to be referred to as 'Fatherless' behaviour. 'Yo Mamma' statements seem to be considered a damning insult. In addition, the ritualistic chant "Excuse me? Sorry. Mommy? Sorry. Mommy? Sorry", which is believed to be the only surviving part of the the lost Litany for Forgiveness, the pair to the Litany against Fear from the Epic of the Dune, validates the theory that Terrans craved parental approval.)

Much more sinister than the Tomm-y-Tallaar-ico is the Jayme-som-Erton, a figure that only talks in the voice of others. A negative deity presiding over plagiarism, Jayme-som-Erton pretends be your ally while making profit off of your work. After Eycha-Bomba-ur-Guy defeated him in a lengthy duel the Utuba Com-men-tits faithfully records that Jayme-som-Erton's own voice can only speak lies and to be wary of the others among the Cree-ator class that use his tricks to prosper in Utuba.

Eycha-Bomba-ur-Guy's legendary victory over Jayme-som-Erton was followed by the complete erasure of the Cree-ator's presence in the Utuba kingdom's religion beyond being used as a cautionary tale. This presents another aspect of Terran religion, called Can-cellat-Ion, a ritualistic deicide of the gods that have wronged them. Undoubtedly this is an evidence of the might of the ancient Terrans. Several pieces of historical evidence from the records known as Twee-et-er (theorized to be named after a blue avian like figure who many believe might be related to the legendary heroes Twee-dle-dee, and Twee-dle-dum) refer to multiple conflicts called the War of the Fans which lead to the Can-cellat-Ion being performed. Ancient Terrans were indeed a fearsome species. (To be noted that some deities do recover while others do not. Criteria for survival unknown.)

In the coming chapters, we'll look into more deities from Terra's various pantheons, such as the eternal enmity between the Goddess Doll-y-Par-tonn and her nemesis Jol-e-Ne. The deity Trish-a-Payt-As, whose children are harbingers for the death of malignant royals is also important to look into. The deity seems to have had hostility towards the Brie-ti-ish royals specifically as legends say they were hit twice by the deity's wrath. Also of particular interest are Ea-Nasir, a deity of trickery and mischief, and ancient literature such as the Gonch-ar-Ov, a lost epic saga whose holo-copy researchers are still trying to uncover today. Both of these are a part of the Tumb-L-Er mystery religion, whose intricate rites and rituals still remain too complex to decode...."

-Excerpt from Chapter 9, "Deities from the Holo", from Scholar Jaarp-r-Saar's The Complexities of Terran Religions.

[astrobei]

el listens to jolene and thinks about max in the gym with mike and how she totally could take her man if she wanted and how she has flaming locks of auburn hair and ivory skin and eyes of emerald green blue and she seethes and ponders and plays the song over and over again until one day max goes “yeah, dolly parton was, like, totally in love with jolene” and then el’s brain short circuits

[ramp-it-up]

Dolly was is that bitch.

Like, who was Jolene that she couldn’t compete with her?

[waywardsalt]

with my phantom hourglass replay, there are two things i noticed;

a possible theme you could glean from the game is action vs inaction, and i think it's especially prevalent before you even leave mercay the first time, with oshus frequently urging link to not go after the ghost ship, then to just wait until the broken bridge is fixed, and seems reluctant at every turn while link and ciela are more than eager to go and do something about this problem, and the people of mercay in general talking about things and their problems but never seeming to act on their fears or desires, as well as the mention that due to the ghost ship, very very few people are still sailing around, while linebeck is one of the only people we see in the game actively going after the ghost ship and still sailing around. i might make a longer post just talking more about the action vs inaction in phantom hourglass but i just noticed it a bit and thought it was a bit of an interesting sort of theme you could find in the game.

linebeck moves so fucking much. i think he moves more than any npc in the rest of the game. not just in his intro cutscene where he is very animated, just in how much he moves when just standing in his little idle post, it's damn near distracting when the camera is focused on him, he moves a lot. i don't think i've really acknowledged how much he moves, and it really gives the impression that he's antsy or eager to get going, both of which fit him pretty well with how he acts.

[mrgaretcarter]

Cowboy Carter is great but what is this Jolene cover ahdkfhajdjfj

[stone-stars]

things that made me say "fuck you for real, murph": unknown tome plays when bev sr. arrives with the death knights, and mee-maw's burden plays when he tells them that that he's given his soul up.

[handsomecleverandrich]

bey's version of jolene is the only song on the album that i'm not sure about

like, i don't necessarily dislike it, but it just comes across as very sad to me

like, the original song is sad, but there is a sort of dignity in its honesty. dolly is desperate to keep her partner and she honestly pleads with jolene even though she knows she's already lost.

but in this version you just feel sad for beyonce, because if you were that secure in your partnership you wouldn't care about jolene at all. you don't get defensive. you don't address a person who isn't a challenge, you just laugh at the attempt and move on. and so in that way this song comes across as a lot more pathetic.

[zestyderg]

Fellas how do we feel about transfem! Joe Wildwest

[marnie1964]

The Jolene reboot is bad in a good way but the Oh Louisiana reboot is bad in a bad way. That’s my take.

[ivorypool]

Andrew Davies, Othello (2001) // Antoine de Saint-Exupery, Manon, Ballerina // Richard Siken, The Torn-Up Road // Sue Zhao, I Still Loved You // Nerdy Girl, Hate Me // sadoeuphemist, The Scorpion and the Frog // Madeline Miller, Song of Achilles // The Mountain Goats, How to Love a Swamp Creature // New Order, Bizarre Love Triangle // Jane Heller Levi, Waiting for this Story to End Before I Begin Another // Lavalove, Luck in Love // Sea Ghosts, Cowboy Hat // Aka Akasaka, Kaguya-sama Love is War Ch 231

[forgotten-daydreamer]

Dolly, sweetie, I'm so sorry.

[blessedmoonsoul]

and yes im very biased but it's the same shit happening with bey's album rn ppl are so funny even the ones that are begrudgingly admitting they're bopping to it still trying to find ways to insult and pick apart that lady's undeniable talent lol. you just look stupid hello!

[strawberrycamel]

bro: hey you wanna finish watching the last 8 episodes of stone ocean

me: yeah sure

*4 hours later*

me: *is irreparably changed*

[waywardsalt]

wrote a really quick short phantom hourglass… drabble? it’s mostly unedited and generally alludes to some dark stuff

Linebeck’s hands shook while Link talked quietly and cheerily with Ciela. They were on the crate; they were always on the crate. Link was nursing a new bruise but was otherwise unharmed and unbothered after that brief… encounter.

Linebeck was totally unharmed during it all, safe sitting in that box the boy now sat on. He was untouched- he always was, barring that first run-in- but his heart hammered in his chest and his hands shook and the scar on his neck itched and everything itched-

Linebeck pulled back from the wheel a moment and all within a second every little memory flooded in. Link and Ciela were so casual over on that little crate, hanging out with Leaf and Neri, joking about him and his fear and what he must’ve done to piss off J-

Linebeck slammed his hands into the steering wheel, causing the ship to jerk to the side. Ignoring the startled shouts from the fairies, he stumbled over and tugged at levers and shut the engine off, barely taking a moment to make sure everything was good to go. Part of him was perfectly certain that he knew what he was doing, it was his ship and he knew how it worked from top to bottom. Otherwise, he needed to get the hell out of there. 

He turned and started to the other side of the engine room. To the stairs that led down into the storage and where from there was the door into the small bathroom with the shower where he could clean himself off and-

Link’s hand closed around his wrist. The boy’s hand was small and firm and lacking malicious intent but none of it registered in Linebeck’s mind. He felt a hand that intended to force him back and make things worse. 

Linebeck tore his wrist away from the hand and before he even took the time to think, shouted, “DON’T TOUCH ME!”

He staggered back a few steps, shaking violently. He stared down at Link, who looked paler than usual, leaning away from him. Linebeck opened his mouth, intending to say something, but nothing came out as everything felt even worse than before. 

Ciela, mercifully, was silent. Link, however, quietly asked, “What’s wrong?”

A feeling like a sheet of ice seemed to coat the inside of Linebeck’s chest. The best he could manage was a weak and accidental shake of his head. “I need to take a shower,” he croaked. 

He turned and hurried down the stairs. Neither Link nor the fairies followed him.