#...... and yet watch me next winter still tell myself it's got nothing to do w the season

[jabeur]

i love spring SO much i might actually cry !!!!!!!!! it's SPRING !!!!!!!!!! LOOK at the flowers !!!!!!!

[spilledkauffie]

Still Having Nightmares

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader Word Count: 1.8k T/W: nightmares, trauma conversations, fluff A/N: MY HEART IS FUCKING BROKEN!!! Do you hear!? All because of this gif set— spoilers!

Song inspo: Nightmares - All Time Low

You squeezed your eyes closed, trying not to let the tears fall. But they weren’t for you— from outside the door, down the hall, and into the living room, you heard the soft mumbling. The desperate “no’s” and the heavy breathing. Rolling over in bed, you placed your hand where he often began the night, right next to you. Knowing he liked to fight this struggles alone, you methodically bit at the inside of your lip, furrowing your brows. 

However, when you heard the static of metal tension, you couldn’t ignore it any longer. Sitting up, you tossed the covers aside. Taking a moment to calm yourself, you quickly wiped the tears off your cheeks and took a deep breath, wanting to be in the best state to help him. Opening the bedroom door you stepped out into the hallway gently. Attempting to make your footsteps as light as possible, you made your way to the living room doorway. Bucky was laying on the opposite side of the apartment’s room from you. 

Watching him toss and turn, sometimes jolt, was difficult, but you always tried to think of how best to help him if you could. As you debated waking him up to end the night terror, something did that for you- hearing him yell your name he completely sat up. You blinked back some tears, hating that you knew his nightmares forced him to see himself losing more than he already had. 

“God-” he exhaled as if he had been forced to hold his breath for five minutes, it was a painful first few breaths. Shoving his hands through his hair, he set his elbows on his knees and tried to steady his breathing, he clearly hadn’t seen you yet, “shit,” you heard him say in a broken voice, though you couldn’t see them, you knew there were tears from the way he sniffled with an inhale every other breath. 

You shifted your weight onto the opposite foot, accidentally catching his attention.

“Hey,” he suddenly said as if nothing had happened, quickly turning his face away from you, rubbing the back of his hand against his eyes, trying to get rid of any proof of tears. Clearing his throat he exhaled, “What’s wrong? Are you okay?”

Tilting your head with a heavy sorrow that he just wanted to push everything aside, you reached for the light switch.

“No!” Bucky exclaimed, before looking down, surprised at his tone, “no,” he said softer, looking back up at you, “can we leave it off? Please?”

“Yeah,” you answered hoarsely, feeling a tightness in your own throat, “of course, baby.”

Walking over to where he was, you settled on the floor, sitting next to him, facing his direction. There was just enough light from the apartment windows for you two to see each other in dim lights streaming in. He tried again to subtly brush away any tear stains, while you joined him. Pushing the top of his wrist against his lip, he dropped his hand, and finally turned to you. 

“Did I-” he swallowed, you saw the tension in his jaw, “did I wake you?” 

“No,” you whispered, raising a hand to fluff back some fallen strands of his messy hair.

“Really?” he perked an eyebrow, “then why are you awake?” 

You hold your breath trying to think of an excuse, but you’d rather say nothing than lie to him again. 

“I didn’t mean to leave tonight, I just-” he quirked the corner of his lips, trying to find the right words, “I’m not used to it, but I didn’t want to leave- I just-”

“I know,” you assured him, free hand touching his forearm, calmly stroking his chilled skin.

He dipped his head shaking it, before giving a disappointed laugh, “you know I thought I was over this,” he admitted, your hand still brushing soothingly through his hair as he stared straight ahead, you swore you could see him thinking of another time. 

“Tell me about it?” 

He pressed his lips together, debating if he wanted to say more, so you let the quiet come between the two of you, and that was okay. Time was needed and you were more than willing to wait for him.

“You know sometimes I can see myself, at different times, and I just keep thinking- when I see that kid, signing up for the army, he looks at me,” he smiled for a second, but it faded faster than it came on, “he had no idea what he was signing up for.” Looking down to the metal replacing his arm, Bucky nodded to himself,  blaming himself for it all.

“Victims never do,” you said, “because it’s not their fault.”

“Victim?” He scoffed, raising his eyebrows in disbelief at you, “have you seen my count-”

“Bucky, what they did to you-”

“But what I did to others-” he started.

“What they did to you,” you repeated, more firmly, stopping him from interrupting you, he waited for your next words, “what they did was cruel and monstrous, but that doesn’t mean you are.” Bucky tilted his head, “you signed up because you’re a brave soldier, what came next was out of your control, but now, you’re back on the path you first started.”

His grey blue eyes were fixed on you when you finished, “tell me about tonight’s nightmare?”

He was quiet again, so you pressed your hand against the middle of his chest, covering his dog tags, before you curled your fingers around the metal and glanced down to study them in your palm. Rubbing your thumb over the raised letters- one tag spelling out his name the other simply saying “Winter Soldier,” you bit the corner of your lip. Bucky never took his gaze off you, studying you studying the tags. 

After a moment of silence, he leaned in closer, slipping his hand against the side of your neck, fingertips pushing into the roots of your hair at the nape of your neck, while he brought his mouth to the opposite side. You tightened your hand around his dog tags as his skin brushed against your knuckles. With the way his chest was already rising and falling and the hum of his moan against your neck, you almost got lost in it. Slowly moving his other hand up your thigh, to your hip, you felt the metal, smooth and cold as ever. Closing your eyes, you focussed for a moment on his hot desperate kisses, his lips felt so good against you, but you knew what he was doing.

“Bucky-” you said softly, but seriously, knowing what you needed to do.

“Mhmm?” he hummed, lips ghosting against you as he waited for you to continue, but when you didn’t, he pulled back to look at you, his hand still caressing the nape of your neck gently.

You stared at him, amazed at how well he was trained to shift from emotion to emotion or just hide them altogether. It seemed wrong that there was so much pain and hurt in you form sympathy when he was the one actually fighting through it. As you stayed silent, his gaze fell to your parted lips. Bucky took his opportunity and met your mouth with a deeply passionate kiss, when you hardly responded he paused the kiss, lips still touching yours as he spoke.

“What is it?” he asked, caressing your cheek.

“I love you so much,” you took a deep breath, placing your hand on top of his and bringing it away from your cheek setting your interlaced hands in your lap, looking back to him, “but that won’t make them go away,” you stated eyebrows knitted together, shaking your head softly, “I need you to talk to me,” you stroked his jawline with your thumb, still holding his hand with your other, and speaking as gently as you possibly could, “so we can work this out together, I want to help you, I want you to be able to stay a whole night with me.”

Taking his hand off your thigh, you heard the metal adjust as he shifted his weight onto it.  

“Alright, in my nightmares. . .I keep hurting you,” his words broke the silence, “different ways, I tell myself it’s not me, it’s that shadow I used to be, but all the same in the end.” 

Listening carefully you placed a soft kiss to the cooled skin of his shoulder, where the scars met metal, encouraging him to continue with gentle stroking motions of your fingertips on the back of his hand. 

“Every time. . .I’m in a place from my past, but you’re there,” he confessed, tightening his grip around your hand, “and you die, all because of me.”

“You’d never hurt me.”

“But I did...I do,” tears were returning and he didn’t understand; the one happiness in his life was being twisted by his past and his mind, he remembered certain things, others a blur and now past and present were blending. . . 

“James,” you brought him to face you with your hand against his cheek, “you’d never hurt me.”

“I’m just-” he said cautiously.

“Bucky,” you said almost disappointed he’d question himself on this.

“I’m just scared I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from hurting you,” he confessed in a louder voice than intended, making you jerk back, but keeping your hand in his helped ground him, “I’m sorry,” he said, calming himself down. 

You could see the tears falling even if he didn’t want you to see them.

“There’s no chance of that happening,” you pressed your forehead against his, “I know you, Bucky, you love me.”

 “But you’ve seen it, if- if someone knows those words- with that book- they reset me and I can’t-” 

You heard him exhale, heavy with pain and hurt and panic. His chest began to rapidly rise and fall. 

“Bucky, Darling,” you moved yourself closer and brought your arms around him, to which he responded by wrapping his around your frame, pulling you even closer, and burying his face against your neck, “it’s okay, we’re okay.”

Feeling his hot tears against your neck, and his erratic breathing, you tilted your head up, trying not to cry yourself. Stroking across the back of his bare shoulders, you softly combed your fingers through his hair, embracing him against you. It wasn’t easy for him to show this much emotion and you could sense that, staggering breath and long periods of tension, as if he was trying to hold it all back. Feeling him tighten his hug and squeeze his eyes closed, you just held him to let him know it was okay.

“We’ll get through this, I promise,” you whispered, “no one is ever coming near you with that book ever again, and if they do. . . now they’ll have to get through me first.”

Pulling away from you just enough to press his forehead back against yours he smiled softly, staying there for a moment, “how’d you get so tough, huh?”

“I live with a fighter,” you smiled back, “he’s taught me to survive just about anything,” he gave a small laugh with his smile spreading, “so together,” you stole a kiss, “I know we’re unstoppable.”

[breadqueen95]

Dress - Bucky Barnes

bucky barnes x fem!reader

wc: 5k

plot: bucky and y/n’s relationship is new, and they don’t want to share with their friends just yet. but something as simple as a dress can change anyone’s mind, even the winter soldier. 

content warnings: kissing. physical affection. flirting. allusions to sex. drinking. being drunk. language. bucky being a flirt. 

a/n: this is for @natasha-romancff and her taylor swift writing challenge! it took me awhile, but i’ve had a ton of fun writing this. so many bucky fics are angsty, and rightly so the man has some TRAUMA. but for my first bucky fic, based on dress by taylor swift, i wanted something happier for him 

***

Damn. That was a lot of leg.

“I don’t know,” you muttered as you stared into the mirror, “aren’t these things…a little classier than this?”

“Uh…have you met Tony Stark?” Natasha grumbled as she continued to scroll through her phone. “The man has never been classy a day in his life.”

“Well I know he isn’t, but fancy people show up to these things. I just don’t want to embarrass myself.” You were currently standing in front of the full-length mirror in Wanda’s room, staring at the reflection of a woman who didn’t quite look like you.

But it was you, wasn’t it? It was just…that you was wearing a very short, very sexy red cocktail dress. The sweetheart neckline was a nice touch, but the back was completely open. And that hemline? Definitely hiked way up past your knees.

“Y/n, relax,” Wanda reassured in her lilting accent, “sure, the dress is a little…spicier…than you’re used to, but it’s in a good way.”

“I’m pretty sure every single person would be able to tell I spend my days in tactical gear. God, I’m not sure I even know how to walk in heels this high!”

Heaving a dramatic sigh, Natasha threw her phone down and looked at you in the mirror. Her eyebrows were raised, and she was giving you her usual ‘don’t give me that shit’ look. It nearly had you shaking in your very strappy black heels.

“Are you kidding me, y/n? I’ve seen you strut in enough fancy parties during undercover missions to know that you’ve got this.”

“Yeah,” Wanda scoffed as she took a sip of red wine from her glass, “all she’s nervous about is what Bucky will think.”

Rolling your eyes, you tried to hide how much that sentence affected you.

“C’mon, Wanda. You know Bucky and I are just friends.”

“Do friends undress each other with their eyes whenever they’re in the same room?”

Damn it. Damn Wanda and her stupid perceptiveness.

“You’re reading too much into it, Wanda.” She just laughed at you, acting like she knew so much better.

What you knew and wasn’t ready to admit to your two best friends, was that she was right on the money.

Bucky Barnes, the infamous Winter Soldier, your favorite person in the entire world, was now your boyfriend. He had been for a few weeks now. The two of you were insanely private people. Hell, it had been years before the two of you had finally learned everything about each other. Once you had gotten past the walls the other had so carefully crafted, well…

At that point you were in love.

But the others didn’t need to know that, not yet at least. The Avengers were a family, your family. They were really the only true family you’d ever had. But Bucky…Bucky was finally yours. And you were his. You didn’t think it was crazy to just want to enjoy that, just the two of you, without everyone else sharing their jokes and opinions just yet. They did it out of love, you both knew that, but you just wanted him all to yourself.

As you looked back at your reflection in the mirror, you took a minute to really consider what Bucky’s reaction might be. He had the best poker face in the room no matter who he was with, but you knew him well enough to know how he was feeling just based on his eyes. He’d always said how much he loved red on you, and he adored every and any excuse to touch your skin. Those steel blue eyes of his would absolutely burn once he saw you in this dress.

And fuck, that was something you really wanted to see.

“Well, if you aren’t going to wear that dress, you better pick something else,” Nat said, jerking you from your fantasies, “we need to be there in twenty minutes, and we all need to touch up our makeup.”

“Actually…I think I’ll wear it,” you said confidently, trying to hide your grin as you ran your hands down the silky fabric.

What you didn’t see was Natasha and Wanda sharing a secret smirk behind you, like they’d known what you’d do the whole time.

***

Six weeks ago, everything had changed for you and Bucky.

You’d known how you felt for a long time. Bucky Barnes, despite his past, was the kind of man anyone could fall in love with. He was sincere, kind, generous, witty…everything you’d ever wanted in a partner. He had been your best friend for even longer.

It had been a long time before you could even admit your feelings to yourself, let alone to him. After everything the two of you had been through, who had the time and mental capacity for romance? It just didn’t seem important. You just chalked up your feelings to being such close friends. All you wanted was to be near him, even if you just sat in silence doing different things. Just being in the same room as Bucky brought you a sort of peace you’d never had before. Whenever he touched you, even if it was just a brief hug or brushing your back to get past you, your skin erupted into goosebumps. But that was just because physical touch was still foreign to you, right?

And his smile. God, his wonderful smile…

Bucky didn’t smile much. He hid behind a mask of stoicism, a remnant from the trauma of his horrible history as the Winter Soldier. Showing any sort of emotion, especially happiness, was hard for him. But when he finally let himself smile? It was the most beautiful thing you’d ever see.        

It took several sleepless nights wrestling with those confusing feelings to figure it out. You didn’t just see Bucky as your best friend. You had it bad. Not just “oh my god he’s so handsome” bad, like the “I would take a bullet for you I’m so in love” bad. That revelation? It left you euphoric. It also left you scared.

Because you were so sure Bucky didn’t feel the same. And that thought was like a knife to the heart every time it flashed through your mind.

So you kept it to yourself. You tried to keep things as normal as possible, but your heart kept fluttering whenever he walked into a room. Being so close to Bucky meant you confided in each other about pretty much everything, and he knew you well enough to know you were hiding something.

It all exploded on a Tuesday night in the compound.

Tuesdays were your movie nights. Bucky had a lot of pop culture to catch up on, so on this night every week he would come by your room to watch a movie. It was a weekly tradition that kind of started by accident. You were shocked he still hadn’t made time to watch Lord of the Rings, so you forced him onto your couch with popcorn and The Fellowship of the Ring. He loved it so much, and immediately asked if you guys could watch The Two Towers the next week. How could you say no to him?

Tonight, you were watching 13 Going on 30. It was your all-time favorite romcom, and you figured you could both use a break from all the action and fantasy movies you’d been cycling through. Something with a happy ending was worth indulging in.

“Does that Matt guy look like Banner to you? Or is it just me?” Bucky asked through a mouthful of popcorn.

“Heh, maybe a little,” you said, “Give or take a few years.” He laughed at that, and you forced yourself to laugh quietly. You wanted to blurt out your feelings every time you looked at Bucky, so you’d gotten quieter and quieter every time you spent time with him. It was an awful reaction, and you knew he noticed. But it was better than losing his friendship, right?

After that awful and painfully obvious forced laugh, Bucky let out a huge sigh and paused the movie. He set the bowl of popcorn down on the coffee table in front of the couch, then turned to face you. Exasperation and hurt glimmered in his eyes.

“Y/n, what the fuck is going on with you?”

“W-what do you mean?”

“Oh come on, don’t give me that,” he said sharply, “I know you better than anyone, and I know for a fact there’s something you’re not telling me. Is it me? Did I do something wrong?”

“What? No, god no!” You exclaimed.

“Well it must be something I did, because you’ve never been this quiet around me and it keeps getting worse. I hate it, and I want to know what I did so I can fix it.”

“Bucky, I’m serious, it’s nothing you did—”

“Then why? Why are you shutting me out?” He cut you off angrily, arms thrown wide. “You’re my best friend, I just don’t get why—”

“I don’t want you like a best friend, Bucky!” Your eyes went wide as the words flew from your lips. In the most comical way, you clapped your hand over your mouth as if you could stop the words that had already been said. Bucky’s eyes narrowed in confusion.

Oh fuck. He didn’t get it. Curse him and his old man ways.

“What does that even mean, Y/n? Are you saying you don’t want me around anymore?”

“Bucky, of course not. God, I would never want that. Never in a million years.”

“Then you better explain, because if you haven’t noticed, I’m over 100 years old. I need a little help here.”

“It means, uh…um,” you stuttered, wringing your hands together. “Is there any chance we can just forget I said that?”

“Nope, not a chance.”

“It means…it means that I care about you. As more than a friend.”

His entire face seemed to crinkle as he processed that. If you weren’t freaking out, you’d be obsessing over how damn cute it made him look. Then his eyes got wide as he began to make the connection. Your stomach nearly fell out of your ass as his eyes lifted again to meet yours.

“I…I think I know what you’re saying,” he nearly whispered, “I just need you to get real specific real fast, because I’m not about to say anything until I know exactly what you mean.”

“It means I’m in love with you, okay?” You burst out. Even through your mortification, there was a sudden sense of relief. A secret as big as that had definitely been weighing you down. Now that it was out there, that was one less thing you had to worry about.

His eyes grew even wider. How that was possible, you didn’t even know. That beautiful mouth of his began to turn up into a small smile as he gazed softly at you.

“You’re in love with me?” He asked, his smile getting wider with each passing second.

“What, you need it carved into stone or something?” You couldn’t help but sass him. Did you fucking stutter?

“No, it’s just…I never thought you’d feel that way about me.”

“Well, clearly I do. So you – wait, you mean you’ve thought about this before?”

“Of course I have,” he said as he shrugged, “I’ve been in love with you for two years now, how could I not think about it?”

You were instantly filled with warmth and pure bliss. In all your obsessing over your own feelings, you’d never allowed yourself to consider that he might feel the same about you. It just didn’t seem possible.

“I’m sorry,” you burst out, holding a hand up, “you’re telling me you’ve been into me for two years and didn’t say anything?”

“Why didn’t you?” He shot back, inching closer to you.

“Because you’re my best friend. I didn’t want to lose you because of stupid feelings I have.”

“But…I have those same ‘stupid feelings’ for you. So can we just cut the whole act and get on with it?” Bucky brought a hand up to cup your cheek, his thumb brushing along your skin so gently.

“Uh…um…get on with what?”

“Well I’d kinda like to kiss you, if you’re cool with it.”

“Bucky Barnes did you just use current slang to ask if you could kiss me?” You didn’t move an inch as his face moved right in front of yours, breath intermingling as you gazed into each other’s eyes. God, was this really happening?

“Yeah, guess your lessons worked,” he murmured.

“Well you better kiss me, then.”

As soon as your lips met, it was like coming home.

***

That memory, your favorite memory, replayed in your head as the three of you stepped into the elevator. Nat and Wanda were happily chatting about who would be there, what kind of antics Tony would cook up tonight, if there would be music we could actually dance to. You know, normal party things.

All you could think about was how long you had to stay until you could sneak off with your boyfriend.

You were so happy Wanda and Natasha had convinced you to wear this dress. When you’d first put it on, the difference from your normal look was so jarring that it took you a few minutes to get used to it. But now that you had, now that you felt the silky fabric shifting against your skin as you moved, now that you saw how dangerously long your legs looked in these heels…

Damn, you felt sexy.

And that sexy feeling? It made you want Bucky’s hands all over you.

But this was a party. A party thrown by Tony Stark, one of the most perceptive and observant people you’d ever met. If you left too soon, if he thought you weren’t “having enough fun”, he’d be more than a little upset. So you had to stay, drink, mingle, maybe dance a little…and then, maybe later, you could go do what you actually wanted.

The elevator pinged, indicating you had reached the topmost floor of the compound. This floor was home to a huge communal space, often used for just hanging out with the team. But on nights like tonight, Tony went all out and turned the space into something that resembled…a club?

The three of you stepped out into the massive room, upbeat music already blasting from the speakers. Typical Tony – he never really outgrew his love for dancing and parties. The bass thrummed through your body, making you want to move to the music. The lights were dim, but you could still tell who was around. It looked like you were some of the last members of the team to arrive. There was a huge bar off to the side, and Natasha headed that way right away. You turned to ask Wanda if she wanted to follow Nat, but she was already making a beeline for Vision. Smiling, you just turned right back around to follow Natasha. A drink sounded pretty good right now.

As you made your way to the bar, you felt more than a few pairs of eyes on you as you walked. You sneakily looked around as you went, noticing men and women watching you with admiration, and dare you say it, longing. As someone whose job was to blend in with the background all the time, this was a different and slightly addictive feeling. You leaned on the bar next to Nat right as the bartender slid her drink over to her.

“Straight whiskey tonight? Damn, going hard.” You quipped.

“Hey now, you know I can handle my liquor. It’s you we need to watch out for, you lightweight.”

Laughing, you scanned the party guests, looking for the one person you wanted to see. Tony had had arm around Pepper’s waist, both laughing at something Rhodey had said. Bruce lingered around them, drink in hand and looking a little nervous, but still happy to be included. Wanda and Vision were sitting quietly on one of the couches, both looking absolutely smitten with each other. Scott Lang, one of the newest additions, was busting some moves, while Peter Parker laughed as he watched. Thor, who was visiting from Asgard, laughed boisterously as he watched various guests try to lift his hammer. You couldn’t help the smile growing on your face. You loved these people so much.

Then, you saw him.

Bucky was with Sam and Steve, as usual. But even as Sam and Steve were talking animatedly next to him, those gorgeous blue eyes of his were glued to you. There was a kind of intensity in them you hadn’t seen before. Your breath whooshed from you body as he grinned at you. Trying to maintain the suggestive image your dress gave you, you managed to send a flirtatious smile his way, then turned back around to face the bar. Leaning against the counter, you knew he’d get an eyeful of your bare back. God, this was fun.

The bartender finally made his way over to you, and you ordered two tequila shots.

Nat turned to you, one eyebrow arched in surprise as she asked, “And you say I’m going hard? You can’t just down two shots right away, babe.”

“I’m not doing two shots; you think I’m stupid?” The bartender slid the shots over to you along with two lime wedges. “One is clearly for you.”

Unable to hold back a laugh, Natasha put her arm around your shoulders and pulled you into her side as she said, “Why the fuck not, let’s do it.” The two of you went through the process: salt, shot, lime. You couldn’t help but wince as you downed the harsh liquor. Of all the shots in the world, tequila probably tasted the worst. The only reason you kept going for it was the warmth it traced down your body, and you felt your muscles begin to loosen up.

“Two more,” you called over to the bartender.

“Uh, no,” Natasha shot at you, grabbing her whiskey, and pushing off the bar, “I’m good with my top shelf shit, you keep going after that gasoline if you want but I’m out.”

“C’mon, Nat,” you called out, “what am I gonna do with two shots?”

“I’m sure you’ll find someone else, babe.” She said with a wave over her shoulder.

Sighing, you turned back to the ridiculously pretty bar (seriously, how much had Tony paid for this thing?). Who else would help you look cool and sexy at a bar for your secret boyfriend?

Okay, that was the cringiest thought you’d ever had. Gross.

As the bartender slid the tequila in front of you, you steeled yourself for the nastiness that was about to happen.

“Fuck, I didn’t think this through,” you mumbled.

“Yeah, you tend to do that,” a deep voice answered on your right. Instead of being the slightest bit surprised, you couldn’t help but smile. You’d know that voice anywhere.

“Something I can do for you, Barnes?” You looked up at him from under your lashes.

“Well, it looks like you’ve got an extra shot there. Thought I could bail you out.”

“Is that all?”

Bucky shifted so that your arms were just barely touching. His hand was right next to yours, and you reached out with your pinky to lightly brush his.

“Doll, you have the gall to show up in that dress and ask what I want as if you don’t already know?”

“Sorry Buck, I’m a little slow, must be the tequila. You should probably be a little clearer.”

Putting on quite the show of reaching for one of the shots, his mouth somehow ended up right next to your ear.

“I want you.”

It was lucky everyone was so distracted and couldn’t see how you shuddered at his words. Trying to maintain brain function, you managed to take the shot with him. You were now fully facing each other. He was wearing the cockiest smirk you’d ever seen, one that would put Tony Stark to shame. You couldn’t help but respond with that same energy despite the jitteriness his three little words had reduced you to.

“Well why don’t you—”

“Hello, my friends!” A booming voice sounded between you as Thor threw a huge arm over each of you. Bucky, with his stupid super soldier strength, didn’t really have a reaction to it. You, on the other hand, stumbled a little under the weight and force of it. “It’s so good to be back with you tiny humans.”

Was…was he slurring his words?

“Thor…are you drunk right now?”

He simply laughed in response. Well, that answered that.

“Of course I am, tiny person! It can’t be a party without good Asgardian wine.”

“Wait…you have literal god wine?” Bucky, who had a look of vague irritation on his face up to this point, now looked interested. Maybe even a little excited?

“Of course, metal appendage.”

“Dude, you can’t just call Bucky ‘metal appendage’—”

“He can if he lets me have some,” Bucky interrupted.

“We have a bargain!” Thor slapped Bucky on the back before scurrying back over to where he had come from, probably to get the wine he had promised.

“Bucky, you can’t even get drunk,” you hissed, “what exactly is the point of this?”

“Since everything happened, I haven’t found any alcohol strong enough to get me drunk. I figure god wine is worth a shot.”

“Bucky—”

“When I kiss you against a wall later, I wanna be a little tipsy,” he whispered in your ear, “that cool with you?”

Unable to keep yourself from smiling again, you nodded as Thor sauntered back over. Ever since that moment a few weeks ago, right before he kissed you for the first time, asking “is that cool with you?” had become your thing.

And the idea of Bucky kissing you against a wall? Yeah, that sounded pretty good.

***

As it turns out, Asgardian wine is just as potent as Thor had promised.

For the first time in over seventy years, Bucky Barnes was certifiably drunk. It made him feel like the Bucky from all those years ago, and it was the most incredible thing. Here he was, over 100 years old, partying, and all his favorite people were here.

Including his ridiculously hot girlfriend.

Even as they both flitted around the party, Bucky and y/n still found each other’s eyes, even from across the room. They would send winks, smiles, even funny faces. All he wanted to do was be right next to her, talk and dance with her all night…

But they had agreed. They wanted to keep their relationship a secret for now, keep the attention off of them for a bit while they got to know each other in this new way.

But god damn, that dress.

Y/n in red was…indescribable. It didn’t matter what she wore, she was always the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen. But in red? In this dress?

She was breathtaking.

“Buck, you breathing?”

A hand waved in front of his face, snapping Bucky’s attention back to the people around him from Y/n’s back. He had been imagining putting his hands all over that back later and had gotten more than a little mesmerized. He managed to get his eyes to refocus, finding a drunk Sam smirking right next to him and an even drunker Steve dancing next to him. But what Steve was doing couldn’t really be called ‘dancing’ per say…more like an aggressive wiggle.

“Why wouldn’t I be breathing?” Of all the things he could’ve said to get Sam’s attention off of him, that wasn’t it.

“Uh, probably because the girl you’re in love with decided to show up and show off tonight? Pretty sure you’re drooling, man.”

Despite himself, Bucky slapped a hand across his mouth, only reducing Sam to wheezing laughter. Knowing he had been caught, he rolled his eyes and grimaced a little. Of all the people to catch him, he wished it hadn’t been Sam.

“I wasn’t…staring… at y/n, I just never see her dressed up is all.”

“I never said anything about the girl being y/n.”

“…fuck.”

“LANGUAGE,” Steve yelled out, pointing a finger at his two friends before returning to his shimmying.

Turning back to him, Sam added, “Just go be with her, Buck. You’re not fooling anyone, and neither is she.”

“We’re that obvious?”

“A few weeks ago you’d at least try to hide it. Now I’m surprised you’re not jumping each other’s bones right here right now.”

“Point taken,” Bucky said, lightly slapping Sam’s shoulder before power walking over to his girl.

***

“Nat, if you don’t stop asking about Bucky and I’s relationship, I’m going to kick you,” you called over the music before taking another swig from your glass. It was no Asgardian wine, but the human stuff wasn’t half bad in your opinion. It wasn’t like you could drink the god shit, anyway. If you had even one sip, you’d be swinging from the ceiling like Miley fucking Cyrus. You were pretty drunk as it was.

“Okay, fine,” she said with a shrug as she took a sip of her whiskey, still as calm and collected as ever. “You’re almost as drunk as he is, you’ll be talking soon enough.”

“Oh? Is that your spy master plan?”

Natasha was still looking as unbothered as ever, but as she looked across the room over your shoulder, her face split into a savage grin.

“It was, but it looks like I might not need it.”

“What do you me—”

Your words were cut off as a large, warm hand enclosed around yours. Whirling around, you were suddenly face to face with the man himself. Bucky was clearly having a good time. His mouth was relaxed into the cutest smile you’d ever seen him wear, and he moved without his normal stiffness and intensity. He threaded your fingers together, smiling down at you with so much love it was a wonder Nat hadn’t said anything yet.

Looking back in front of you, ready to explain yourself, you only found empty air. Guess she’d seen all she needed to, but honestly, you really didn’t care. All you’d wanted the whole night was to be exactly where you were right now; hand in hand with the man you loved.

“We’re just kidding ourselves, doll,” Bucky called next to your ear, “Sam said we’ve been pretty obvious.”

“Nat said the same,” you answered with a sheepish smile, “kind of hard to keep my face under control when you’ve got that leather jacket on.”

“You’re blaming me?” He asked with mock indignation. “You’re the one who looks,” he gestured wildly to your whole body, “like that!”

Trying ignore the heat spreading over your cheeks, you shot back, “Like what?”

“Like the most…” he screwed his face up in the most adorable way as he searched for words, “like the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.” As the last few words tumbled out of his mouth, he gazed at you with such a softness you almost melted right into the floor.

“Wanna get out of here?” You asked, finally giving up the game. It was pointless, really. Now, all you wanted to do was for your boyfriend to keep his promise and kiss you against a wall.

Wrapping an arm around your waist, he answered, “Absolutely.” Without looking at a single soul, the two of you began walking as quickly as you could for the exit. You and Bucky were both leaning on each other a bit, but you wouldn’t have it any other way.

Stepping out into the light of the hallway, you blinked as your eyes adjusted after the dark room you’d spent the last few hours in. Bucky led you until you were right in front of the elevator, and he lazily pressed the button to go up. There was tension in the air between you, like a thread that was being pulled. Biting your lip, you stared at the doors in front of you. You knew if you so much as looked at the man next to you, you’d jump him right then and there.

The shining doors slid open, and the pair of you walked in, his strong arm still around your waist. His grip wasn’t loose in any sense of the word. Bucky kept you right next to him, even as your legs wanted to drift all over the place. You pressed the button for the residential floor.

As soon as those doors slid shut, that thread of tension snapped.

Bucky whirled you to face him, then walked you backward until you were pressed against the wall of the elevator.

“I promised I’d kiss you against the wall, didn’t I?”

He didn’t even wait for a response. His mouth was on yours in an instant, lips moving together like a dance. The kiss was slow and unhurried. You tried to bring him closer, linking your hands behind his neck and pressing yourself to him. Instead of responding in kind, he unwound your arms from around him and pinned them above your head.

Oh damn.

Okay.

No complaints here.

“You’ve been teasin’ me all night just by wearing that dress, sweetheart,” he murmured in between the kisses he trailed down your jaw, “I think it’s my turn.”

“Would it change your mind knowing I only wore this dress so you could take it off?”

The heat that bloomed in those blue eyes of his was unmistakable. As the doors opened on your floor, he swept you up into his arms and began to walk purposefully to his apartment. All the while, he kept that signature cocky smirk of his you’d come to adore.

“Bucky?” You asked once he’d walked into his unit.

“That sentence was the single most attractive thing you’ve ever said,” he murmured as he set you down. Even still, he kept you pressed against him. “But nah, I’m a patient guy. I think I’ll take my time.” He followed this by resuming his slow and sensual kisses, and you couldn’t help but melt into them.

“I love you,” you whispered against his lips.

“I’ll never get tired of hearing that, doll. I love you too.”

***

[eldritchtickles]

A Lesson in Love and Dunamancy

And here's one of those once in a moon fics I write! Inspired by an ask from a long long while ago that I cannot find anymore lmao. But enjoy some wizard tickles! And of course a big thank you to the Critickle Role discord for not only lotsa ideas, but also keeping me writing this with your own amazing work lmao. Enjoy!

Fandom: Critical Role

Characters: Essek Thelyss, Jester Lavorre, Caleb Widogast

Word Count: 2665

“And as you can see here..”

The dark skinned hand moved lightly across the thick paper, gentle fingers tracing the runic symbols etched into its form. Essek’s eyes were focused as he read through the ancient script, while Caleb’s followed the drow’s finger with intent. Both wizards were sat closer to each other than either seemed to realise, leaning deeply into one another. The room was cosy, hazy with incense with small candles floating lazily through the air. Calm, oriented, as a wizard’s study should be. “These dunamantic symbols are the basis for most spells”, the Shadowhand continued. “Any current spell relies on these calculations, and predictably any new ones would include them too.”

“Ah, ja, I see it now…”, Caleb muttered, leaning closer as a slight smirk played at the edges of his lips. “I also see you already suspect I intend to play with dunamancy’s limits myself, hm?”

Ah, he was caught. A soft smile came to Essek’s face as he nodded. He knew Caleb Widogast would not be one to leave such magic alone if he could create with it. The transmutation master kept true to his discipline, creating something of nothing at a moment’s notice. Including making a need for Essek to put him back in place.

His face leaned down closer to his human companion’s, a twinkle of slight playfulness in his eyes at Caleb’s snark.

“Yes, Herr Widogast, I imagine you’ll be creating many a spell based on the Krynn magic, hm?”

As Caleb went to retort just as smartly, the gentle cosy candlelit haze of the room was bathed in the harsher light of the hallway outside.

“Oh ­Caleeeeeeeb~!”

Both wizards were suddenly acutely aware of their close proximity to one another as Jester Lavorre loudly interrupted their study session. In a second Caleb found himself alone on the floor as Essek’s floating spell took effect and jettisoned him into a more regal standing position, even if his face was flushed an embarrassed lilac colour.

“OH!’, Jester exclaimed, a not so sorry grin on her face as she surveyed the suddenly awkward tension she had created. “I didn’t meanto interrupt you two cuddling-“

“Jester!!”, Caleb yelped, embarrassment lending his voice a strangled tone as he stumbled to his feet and brushed himself off and cast a glance to Essek. “You… You did not disturb anything. Was there something you needed from us this urgent?”

Jester was already in the room as the wizard spoke to her. She inspected the floating candles overhead, courtesy of the magic inside Caleb’s Tower, giving each a slight poke to watch it bob away free of gravity. She cast a teasing grin at the two flushed wizards, before diverting her attention to the dunamantic scroll on the floor as she spoke.

“Weeeeelllllll”, she began, nose scrunching up as she tried to understand the arcane glyphs. “Beau asked me to get you! She needs help compiling notes, and said ‘his stupid keen mind would kind of be helpful’. So I came to fetch you for her!”

“Ah scheisse, you’re absolutely right”, Caleb said with a small groan, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Essek, would you remain here? I promised Beau earlier I’d help her with her endeavour, I’ll finish quickly and be right back to continue.”

“Ah, quite, yes…”, Essek mumbled, glad to feel the blush on his cheeks calm down. “Take all the time you need, alright? I’ll prepare the next part of the lesson in the interim.”

No more words passed between the two, just a polite smile and a nod before Caleb parted to help his comrade. Soon as the door closed, Essek let out a slow breath. What had he been thinking? This was a professional relationship, student and mentor, and yet he had been practically sitting in Caleb’s lap as he had taught. Where was his usual maturity? Had he gone mad? Really, he had to get his act together before someone thought-

“Essek likes Caleb~!”

The Shadowhand froze up. The heat of his lilac blush returned, reaching his ears this time. Just over his shoulder was the grinning face of Jester, he knew it. He could practically fucking feel her waggling her eyebrows suggestively at him. Damn tieflings.

He rounded quickly on the woman, face not seeming able to decide between incredulous, embarrassed, or angry. Probably a mix of all three.

“Jester I- You can’t think that- That’s just not-“

A breath. Nerves calmed.

“…….. Ms. Lavorre, you cannot make such claims about two acolytes. It is in very bad taste, our relationship is strictly-“

“Oh come ooooon, Essek! Admit it, you like the stinky wizard!”, the tiefling said in a lilting voice, walking around to his front so she could stand on her tip toes till her nose met his, which made him make a funny face as he floated back a step. “I mean, no one will blame you. Caleb is charming, and sweet, and kind of dirty but that can be fixed, and he’s so clever, Essek! And he’s-“

“Jester, I do not-“

His voice caught in his throat, before a pout was brought to his face as the drow turned from the intruder on his lesson. He started to spread out another spell scroll, putting all his effort into making sure he was solely concentrating on this.

“I would prefer not to speak on this topic if you don’t mind Jester.”

If it were anyone else, they might have taken the hint. Essek’s exterior had turned icy and aloof, as it had been when they first met, and was usually enough to deter more questioning. But while her insight may not be as good as Caducueus, Jester had enough of it to see through the drow’s shit.

“You are such a liar!!”, she whined, accentuating her point with a poke to the back of his ribs.

It took Essek a few seconds to realise through his brooding that he had squeaked.

It took a few more to have him pinned on his back underneath the grinning tiefling.

“Jester, this is most- A-Ah, Jester!!”, the Shadowhand blustered, squirming slightly as a clawed hand gripped his ribs. He was not used to… Physical touch. Much less being pinned with his arms above his head, straddled by a strong blue trickster. His blush was back in full swing.

“Well, are you going to tell me Essek~?”, Jester asked, that familiar lilt in her voice that meant a plan was in motion. “Or, we could juuuuuuuuuust…”

She accentuated her point with a gentle waterfall of tickles cascading down the stretched out ribs beneath her. Those pointed nails cut through Essek’s shirt worse than any blade, a choking giggle trapped in his throat now he expected it this time. That didn’t mean it didn’t- No, if he admitted the word to himself he’d be doomed.

“M-Ms. Lavorre, I would kindly ask you-“

Shit, he almost laughed as she brushed the area right under his arm. Deep breaths.

“I would ask you let me gohoho!! Dohohon’t!!”

That was most definitely a whine.

“Wow Essek, I knew you were squishy but even Caleb can hold out longer”, the girl teased with a giggle, concentrating her free hand on the wizards lower tummy. It was the spot that had earned the giggle, and with a slight ruffle of his shirt that dark drow skin was exposed to the air and a tiefling’s evil fingers, fluttering along his waistline. “Aren’t you the most ticklish Shadowhand in the Dynasty~! Tiiiiiickle tickle, Essek!”

“I am… T-Thehehehe only Shadowhand and you knohohow this full wehehehell Jester- DOHOHOHON’T SAY THAHAHAHAT!!”

She snickered at the little squeak as he said her name, and the subsequent shout at such a little tease. The poor man’s face was flushed so much you’d think him drunk, the only thing worse would be- oh, she couldn’t-no, definitely could. Artagan would be sorely disappointed if she didn’t.

“Ok Essek, time to get real!”, Jester said with a serious face, nodding to the giggly elf beneath her as if in agreement on what she was about to do. “When you want to tell me how much you looooooooove Caleb, you let me know, ok Essek?”

“W-What? Jester, wait, what?”, Essek asked as he regained his breath, diaphragm working overtime to get back oxygen lost to giggles. His mind was already slightly addled, not even realising his arms had been let go. He quickly did take that into account, if only because they had shot down to grab Jester by the horns and try push her away as a scream ripped through his body.

“JEHEHEHEHESTER!! THAT IHIHIHIS- EEEEEEHEHEHEEE!! TERRIBLE STOP IT STOP IHIHIHIT!!”

Ignoring his pleas, Jester just giggled and shook her head in amusement before returning to nibbling gently at the soft stomach beneath her. The tiefling’s hands held Essek’s hips down as her thumbs gently massaged a ticklish touch into the dips in them. His back arched as the sharp little teeth scraped along his skin, and as Jester cast a look up at his face her eyes lit up like a Winter’s Crest tree.

“You’re crying?!”, Jester giggled, an incredulous look on her face. Essek’s head was tilted back in ticklish ecstasy, eyes screwed shut as streams of tears stained his bright lilac cheeks. Frankly, it was the most adorable sight Jester had ever seen! And she knew she was close to getting an answer from the deathly ticklish drow.

“P-Plehehehease, Jester, just not my stohohomach...”, Essek pleaded weakly, hand still tangled in the tickle monster’s hair and horns. “I’ll do anythihihing, just not there..”

“Anything, hm?”, Jester pondered, raising herself from his stomach to give him a break and smoothing his shirt back down. Even thatearned a squeak, she noted. “Liiiiiiiiike….. Admitting you have a teeny, tiny, itsy-bitsy crush on Caleb….?”

There was a solid five seconds of silence as Essek debated with mattered more; his sanity, or his pride.

Jester got her answer as his face turned back to a pout, turning away from her.

She shrugged. Time to try somewhere else.

“Hm, alrighty then Essek!”

In a second, after a slight tousle, Essek’s light form had been flipped so he now lay on his stomach with Jester laying on top of him, facing toward his-

“Jester, don’t you fucking-“

His face burned as she ignored his words, feeling his ankles gripped in a hold by Jester’s deceivingly strong arms. He had of course taken off his shoes on entry of the tower, as any good guest would. Now he was wishing he’d be a bit ruder in the Nein’s abode.

“Oh, I’m just making sure your feet aren’t dusty when your crush comes back! See? I’m helping~!”

Essek thought no such thing as he felt those fluttering fingers returning to his poor oversensitive skin. He felt the tears well up already, which was fucking embarrassing might he add. Speaking of embarrassing…

“A cootchie coo, little Shadowhand~! Don’t be embarrassed, maybe Caleb will find it cute when he finds out how unbearably ticklish you are! He’ll be all like ‘ja, zat is inchresting Essek, you look so cute ven you are laffing unt squirming, tickle tickle my dear’. Just like that! Wow, you reeeeeaaaally hate teases huh, Essek? Let’s test!”

“Lehehehet us nohohot, Jester-“

“I’m going to get youuuuu~! I’m going to tickle these poor, helpless feet!! Aw you’re going to giggle soooo much when I just….”

“Jester, no, Jehehehester- NAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! STOP THIS INSTAHAHAHANT- EEEEEEEHEHE!!”

As her claws scratched from his heel, across his sole, before nestling under his toes to make a wiggling, tickling home for themselves, Essek lost all resolve. He barely kicked anymore, body limp as silent laughter overtook him. Instead he lay shaking from the intensity of it, face sore from smiling so much more than normal, tears rolling hot down his face and falling dangerously close to meticulously written scrolls. All till…..

“I- Pffft nahahahaaaaa!! I LIHIHIHIHIKE HIM JESTER!!”

No sooner had the words left the wizard’s mouth did the devilish fingers below leave him. Essek sucked in deep breaths, grateful for fresh air in his tired lung. Finally, a break… Even if…

His eyes snapped open as his blush deepened. Had he really-

He looked back quickly at Jester, grinning broadly with twinkling eyes.

“Jester-“

“I have to, Essek-“

“You will not, Jester-“

“OH, CALEEEEEEEB-“

No sooner had Jester yelled for the wizard of the hour had she found herself under Essek instead, helped by some sort of gravity spell. His hand was clamped over her mouth to shut her up, a panicked expression on his face.

“Jester, you cannot mention this to anybody, do you understand- DID YOU JUST LICK MY HAND?!”

The look of delight as Jester giggled through the barrier of his hand gave him an answer. Despite his panic, Essek couldn’t help but break a smile. Jester Lavorre was genuinely the silliest girl he’d ever met. But still, he had to keep her quiet… And there was one way to keep her that way.

“Let me explain this in a way you can understand Ms. Lavorre…”

Jester was about to say something rude back, but instead a muffled squeal was all that escaped. Essek had a look of absolute seriousness on his face, not unlike the first time they’d met him, that made the cleric’s eyes widen. Then they snapped closed as his hand goosed her lower rib, extracting another squeal.

“You are not to mention this exchange to anyone, understood?”

His hand moved lower, fingers digging deep into the pocket of her hip. Jester cackled and snorted behind the man’s hand, unable to fight against the dunamantic magic that held her in place. It seemed wizard’s made amazing ticklers, with their dexterous, precise fingers.

“Nod your head if you understand, Jester…”

Essek was enjoying this. He had a grin on his face, one less evil and more proud. Jester was about to nod when the hand at her mouth joined its brethren, both choosing to squeeze at the point where hips met thighs. The laughter that spilled from Jester’s mouth was hysterical, giving her the boost needed to break the spell’s hold on her as her hands weakly tried to pry Essek’s off of her, legs pedalling in the air with how much the Shadowhand’s fingers tickled.

“Ah… Essek? Jester?”

Both parties stopped dead. Neither had even heard the door open, but as they looked they found Caleb standing in the entryway. His face was noticeably flushed at the sight he had encountered, not able to look directly at them. Though Jester and Essek didn’t look at each other, both knew what the other was thinking; adorable.

“I-I apologise, Beauregard had asked the Tower be soundproofed tonight so I did not hear from outside… Should I….?”

“No!! Gods, Light no!!”, Essek yelped, scrambling to his feet and casting a half-hearted glare to Jester, who stuck her tongue out back. “Jester was just leaving, aren’t I right Ms. Lavorre?”

“Oh, of course, Mr. Thelyss~!”, the woman giggled, speeding from the room with a wink to the wizards.

“……… So that was-“

“Advanced interrogation techniques, we shall call them.”, Essek said quickly, trying to keep away the blush once more. Caleb couldn’t help a small smile crossing his face at that, taking a seat beside the spell scroll once more.

“Ah, a different sort of lesson for our cleric, I suppose…”, he said with a small chuckle, patting the spot beside him. “Let us stick to dunamancy for tonight, hm?”

Essek took a few seconds to smooth out his robes and compose himself. Seeing Caleb act so… Normally about all this. It was oddly comforting, to know he didn’t mind. Even stranger, Essek thought as he took his seat, was one observation.

That wasn’t so bad.

“Perhaps a lesson for another day, Mr. Widogast?”

He caught the way Caleb flushed and concentrated on the scroll, along with the small embarrassed smile that returned.

“Heh. Another day, yes.”

[hard-to-be-the-bard]

Bucky X Modern!Reader

“

Tbh i’m probably gonna make this a series if you all like it :) let me know if you want a part 2

Warnings: Violence, Language, Torture

You stayed at Stark tower because you were useful, and because it would be dangerous to allow you to be let loose on your own

You had stumbled into the Marvel Universe on pure coincidence, and you had no idea how. Tony had given ideas of space rifts and time loops, but that made no sense to you

Nick Fury wanted you to keep you there so he could use what you knew, about major events, after all, you knew their future

But you refused to speak, you’d seen what had happened when their timelines had been altered before, and you didn’t want to be the cause of anything happening

So you let things play out the natural way

You’d arrived shortly after Ultron

It turns out however, this universe was slightly different to the one you knew

Because Bucky was living at the tower

He’d stayed at the end of what should of been the Winter Soldier, and was going through therapy processes while Tony worked on his arm

You were what you could call friends

Being that he would smile at you when you entered a room, offering a hello, and engaging in small talk

Bucky liked to keep to himself, and you respected that, the man had been through a lot

Bucky knew you were from a different reality, and knew you knew about his past

You’d helped him fill in a few blanks here and there if he was desperate, and he always seemed surprised when you did something you knew he’d enjoy

He told you you knew him better than himself

Which was true in a way

His memories still not fully recovered, and when you were in your world, you’d already had a small crush on the man

It seemed it only grew here

You liked him, a lot, it was almost painstakingly obvious, Steve knew, he’d asked you about it after seeing you leave Bucky’s room after calming him from a nightmare

You didn’t think anyone else knew, but then again, you were living with the Avengers, so it wouldn’t be a surprise

On top of living with them, you were made to take part in training, they wanted you to be ready in case anything did happen

And you were glad you’d done so

It turned out it was just S.H.I.E.L.D who knew about you HYDRA did too.

And you’d managed to let them get to you

And Bucky too

You’d both been alone, the avengers out on a mission, and Bucky wasn’t passed for all missions yet, just smaller ones. So he’d been with you for the day, watching films together on the sofa.

When the power went out

You’d frowned, trying to talk to JARVIS to see what was happening, but there was no response

But Tony had said JARVIS was on a different power source, in case of an electrical failure

Meaning that this wasn’t a normal power cut

You’d informed Bucky as such, and he looked at you, brow furrowed, before pulling you up, taking you towards his room, which was luckily, on the same floor, he opened the door, gesturing you in before closing it

“Doll-” He starts softly, not knowing what to say

“If this, if this is a break in, we have your phone that’s it, and if there’s no signal we have no way to contact the others, or even know if they’ll pick up-” He takes a deep breath in before walking to his wardrobe, moving some things before dragging out a case

“I know you know how to use a gun sweetheart” He says, as he unlocks it, revealing a range of guns, from smaller hand guns to larger ones

“I taught you myself” He says, picking up a glock 26 and pressing it into your hands, along with a box of ammo, he moved to the side of his bed, pulling out a waist belt, with a pocket on the side handing it to you

“Saves you carrying the ammo around, more room to point and shoot” He barely whispers, and you notice his hands shaking ever so slightly

It’s then you hear the loud bang at the end of the hallway, and Bucky freezes, looking up, before clasping your head in his hands

“Doll, listen to me now, I know you have no experience with this, but, no matter what happens, your main goal is getting off this floor, and outside, okay, call Steve, Tony anyone, but you need to keep yourself alive for me” He practically begs, and you begin to tear up

“Bucky I-” But you don’t finish another loud bang echoing, closer this time, and Bucky opens another door in his room you didn’t know he had

“Through here” He motions, taking you through the door, locking it behind you.

He stops, looking at you once more

“Doll I’m gonna have to leave you soon” He says and you frown staring at him

“W-What why? We can go together” You plead, and he shakes his head

“I need to take care of this sweetheart” He says, taking you down the corridor, pushing you towards the stairwell

“Go” He demands, and you falter for a brief second before whispering

“Don’t get yourself killed” And he smiles for a moment before turning on his heel, gun in hand

And you take it as a cue to leave, running down the steps, and you keep going until you hear footsteps, and you freeze, lifting the gun slightly, before seeing a closet and ducking inside, turning the lock behind you

Quickly you pulled out your phone, sighing in relief when you saw it had signal, and shakily to typed out a text message

Tower compromised. Come Quickly. 

And you copied in everybody, before attempting to call Tony

But it goes straight to voicemail and you curse, before hitting Steve’s name, hearing footsteps come closer

And thank god he picks up

“Hey, y/n, what’s wrong i’m just in the middle of-” You cut him off, voice shaky

“S-steve you have to come back, there, there’s some people in the tower, the powers gone, and Bucky’s upstairs somewhere, I--” You almost drop the phone at the sound of gunfire and you hear Steve curse, shouting to Tony

“Hey doll, take a deep breath, where are you?” He asks, and you tell him

“A closet, on the 6th floor” You whisper, before hearing footsteps again, and he speaks

“You got a weapon?” He asks, and you tell him yes and he lets out a sigh of relief

“We’re on our way back, 10 mins tops, don’t worry doll, nothings gonna happen to you I promise” He says

But he speaks to soon

Because the next second the door is caved in, and you have two guns pointed at your head, the phone slides out of your grasp as one of the large men grab you, shoving you forward with their gun

Steve’s still on the phone, and he heard the door cave

“Doll? You there? Y/N?” He calls, and one of the men picks up the phone

“You know where to find us” Is all he says before hanging up.

Steve feels his blood run cold, as Tony looks at him, panic in his eyes

“What’s going on?” He asks, and Steve can barely speak

“They have her” He whispers, and Natasha’s head shoots up, cursing softly

“Tony we have to go faster” He urges, and he shakes his head

“I would if I could, but I physically can’t” He says

You wake up in the dark, arms bent painfully around your back, zip tied together, and then bound with thicker rope, you tugged sharply, giving up once the plastic cut into your wrists, knowing it was no use. You sniffled letting out a curse

Then you heard a voice call out

“Doll?” It asked, soft and unsure, and your head shoots up

“Bucky?” You respond and you hear him sigh

“Shit doll, are you hurt?” He asks, and you feel the throbbing at the back of your head from where you’d probably been knocked out

“I think I’m okay” You whispered, before saying

“I called Steve, he knows” And you hear Bucky move against his restraints

“Good job sweetheart” You think he’s about to say more but the door swings open, light flooding in, and you squinted, your eyes adjusting, before you opened them and you finally saw Bucky, his head low, eyes watching you

And he saw the bruises, and he winced, how did you think you weren’t hurt. Unless you were in shock he thought, staring at the already formed purple angry splotches along your chin and cheekbone

You stared at him, eyes teary and he felt his heart break.

You could die here

And he wouldn’t be able to save you

The man who entered a room pulled out a chair, siting on it to face you

“Now, Miss l/n, this can go two ways, either. you tell me what I want to know and no one gets hurt. Or, we hurt you, a lot” He says, and you frown at him

“I don’t know anything” You say, confused but the man tuts

“I think you do, what I want to know, is, a certain string of phrases, 10 words, to be precise, and I think you know just what I’m talking about” And you freeze, because you do, and even Bucky stops, knowing exactly what he’s talking about, his eyes narrowing in confusion

But how would you know, you didn’t work for HYDRA.

And then it hit him, you would know, you knew everything about him, which included those words

“I-” You stumble, you weren’t going to tell them, you couldn’t

“Go to hell” You spat, and the man sighed, and Bucky stared at you

“Well then, it looks like you’re going to be hurt” He says, and signals to someone, and a tall looming man steps over, walking towards you, fist raised

“Do what you must” He says

And the man descends upon you

You didn’t know when you lost consciousness, but you did know that Bucky was screaming the second you woke, and you felt a fist connect with your jaw again.

And your body writhed in agony

Bucky begging for them to stop

“Doll it’s alright, just say it, it’s okay” He pleads, and you realised he was screaming because of you, not because he was being hurt, and you frowned, barely able to shake your head before you let out a soft no

And that was all it took for the man to start again, but he was bored of this approach, hauling over a large black bucket, water sloshing over the edge, and you knew what was going to happen

So did Bucky

“You’ll kill her!” He begged, screaming at you to just tell them, but you shook your head

And he pushed it under the water

You came back up grasping for air, shaking at the coldness of it, and that was when the door opened

Steve in the doorway, shield raised, and a look you’d never seen before on his face

It was almost feral

And his shield connected with the man’s neck and he fell to the ground, and you heard Bucky’s cries

“Get her Steve, get her” He says, and you feel your head being lifted up, Steve looking at you, concern on his face as he muttered apologies, and you felt the rope binding you loosen, and the pain in your arms prickling as you finally gained the ability to move them, and you collapsed into Steve’s arms

Soon Bucky had ran over to your side, his arms wrapping around you, tugging you from Steve’s grasp, who passed you over as Bucky cradled you

“You’re okay doll, you’re okay” He mumbles into your forehead, but you’re not sure who’s he’s trying to reassure, and you’re just so tired

And then your vision turns black

You wake up in a hospital

A soft beeping in your ear, and the scratchy noise tickling sterile smell

You notice an IV drip in your arm and you frown, reaching out to tug out the invasive needle, when a hand grasps your wrist gently

“You need that darling” A voice croaks, and you turn your head to see Bucky, puffy eyed, and looking tired, his eyes red from crying

“H-Hey buck” You whispered, your throat sore, and words appearing scratchy

He smiles softly, but it doesn’t reach his eyes and you frown, pressing a hand against his cheek

“Come on, I know you got a better one than that in you” You joke, and he laughs, before starting to cry

And you’d never seen something so heart-breaking, it sounded wrong, the breathy gasps that escaped his throat, and it was gut wrenching, and you hated it

“Hey don’t cry, I don’t look that bad do I” You chuckle, and he looks at you

“You nearly died doll” He whispered, and you pause, had you

“You technically did, your heart stopped, they didn’t think you’d, I-” He takes in a deep breath and you frown softly

“I’m okay though” You say, hand still on his face

“Look I’m alive” You offer, and he shakes his head

“I never should of left you doll” He mumbles, and you shake your head

“Don’t you dare blame yourself James Buchanan Barnes” You state, and he looks up at the use of his full name, about to protest

“Don’t argue with me” You whisper, and pat his cheek, shifting in your bed, before wincing

“Doll-” He begins, looking worried but you waved it away

“How bad do I look?” You joke and Bucky looked down, and you frowned

“Buck?” You asked, and he looked like he was gonna cry again

“Doll I’m sorry, they, you’re gonna have some scars, and a lot of bruising for a while” He whispers, and you nod slightly

“At least you’re okay” You say, and he shakes his head

“Me? Doll you’re the one who nearly- and you’re worried about me?” He asks incredulously, and you nod

“I just- you’re not, mad about me knowing” You ask, and he knows what you’re talking about, but he shakes his head

“Doll, I trust you” He mumbles, and he looked like he was about to say something else when the others burst into the room 

[impala1967dwinchester]

Sam Winchester: it's cold outside

Pairing: Sam W. x Fem!Reader

Pov: Sam

Warnings: Fluff, cuteness, Christmas themes, snowing outside, comfy spots,

Summary: Opening Christmas gifts. AU! Sam and Y/n realize they both got each other the same gifts. They also watch the snowfall. maybe a proposal

Word Count: 2k

A/N: This is the second to the last writing challenge I have to complete. I'm so happy and sad that this challenge is almost over.

Square: Fluffy Jumpers

Sam Winchester Master List

Main Master list

Taglist: @sweetdetectivequeen @band--psycho @wonderfulworldofwinchester

The snow outside was starting to cover the porch. it was just barely six am, rolling over I grabbed y/n. she moaned slightly into me as I shifted her into my grasp. Y/n felt so warm around my arms she eventually got comfortable around my grasp.

Seven am the digital clock said, the sun was just baby peeking over the horizon yet. This was the first winter, the first Christmas that Y/n and I would be spending together fully alone. So in technical terms, this is our third Christmas together.

She moaned again as she shifted in my arms the morning sun just not bright enough to fully wake her from her dreams, or even her sleep. slipping from her grasp I snuck from our bed and down stairs.

Having hidden a few presents in the closet away from sneaking eye, such as Y/n. I had noticed the last two years Y/n always no matter what has to sneak a peak.

This year I most definitely did not need y/n snooping around my gifts. Bringing them in from the closet I tried my hardest to place the gifts in empty spots under the Christmas tree.

After doing so, I got to work on breakfast. Seeing as I was the better cook between the two of us. I made hot chocolate and coffee because Y/n was mostly going to sleep till dawn I needed something to wake her up even it was Christmas morning. I turned on Christmas music just something low, but sweet enough to in have in the background.

You know what's funny to me, as a child as kids who believe in a magical person who deliveries present. I remember my older brother Dean beating me at waking up every single Christmas morning. My mother and father would come in hours later and tell us that Santa had come. Dean would beat me down the stairs and always had so much energy, but our parents never seemed against it.

It's funny the little memories you hold on to even twenty-plus years later. The deal between Y/n and I was so. The first year we would visit her family up in Utah and the following year we could visit mine in Kansas.

Eight am and Y/n is still not awake. Alright try for plan two, I walked my way up the stairs with a cup of coffee and a bowl of fruit. nothing too heavy seeing as she is just going to wake up.

Walking in through the open doorway. I was met with a beautiful moment, or whatever you want to call it. Y/n was curled up into my pillow tightly hugging it, the blinds that had been left open the night before for the moon's bright beam to cast in were instead the bright sun casting in. It cascaded over her face, down her arms, beaming down slightly onto the skin on her leg.

I quietly set down her cup of coffee and the bowl of fruit grabbing my phone from the back pocket of my flannel pants. Snapping one or two or maybe five pictures of her. In moments like this, a picture is really worth a thousand words.

Throwing my phone back into my back pocket. I walked over to Y/n quietly and gently tried shaking her awake. "My love wakes up," I spoke gently in her forehead kissing it a few times. "My love it Christmas" She didn't budge her grasp on my fluffy pillow only tightening.

"My love I have coffee for you, and I made breakfast." I tried saying a bit louder and more clear. She moved eventually after I spent ten minutes of my morning caressing her arms, her forehead, and brushing through her hair with my hands.

"My dear, it almost nine in the morning," I said pushing the coffee closer to her on the side table in our bedroom. She moaned and groaned as she shifted and was just barely awake. "Good Morning my love," I said gently as I didn't want to bombard Y/n with too much in the morning.

She stretched and reached towards me. "Mornin' Sammy!" Y/n said. I moved out of her way, she swang her legs over the edge of our bed and set her feet into the slippers.

"Coffee?" I asked her, she hummed in response and took the hot cup out of my hands. Y/n hair was wrapped in these odd color things, but according to Y/n, it was to curl her hair in her sleep especially when her hair was wet.

The odd things that women did for their beauty routines. She sipped at the coffee, her head resting on my shoulder. "It snowed last night baby," I spoke as she got up and walked towards the window.

I could write you a dictionary size book of things that I love about Y/n, and that right there, this moment was another I'd have to add to that book.

Nine am. Y/n in the shower, after finishing her coffee and bringing her hidden gifts out and doing the same as I. I worked on dinner ham, muffins for the hell of it. Things I knew that Y/n had fallen in love with when we visited my parents, and of course there were meals that I wanted to desperately try that we had in Utah with Y/ns family.

Ten am. Y/n was done with her shower and currently finishing up her makeup. I slipped upstairs noticing cozy outfits laid out on our now made bed. One for her and me. I made my way into the bathroom, Y/n wrapped in her towel and applying a bit of everything that was laid out against the shared sink space.

I came in and wrapped my hands around her waist. She leaned her head into my shoulder as I kissed her jawbone and her neck. Whispering into her ear, "Merry Christmas, baby." I said unclasping her from my grip, stripping off my pants and tank top.

The hot water ran down my back as I remembered that today I'm asking Y/n the forever question. Last Christmas I had even asked her father for the mission to marry his daughter. Even if he said no, I'm pretty sure his wife would have smacked him and told me 'yes you may, honey'.

Eleven am. I was finished with my shower, Y/n was done with her light makeup. We were both wearing our matching outfits. We made our way downstairs, y/n slipped her phone from her hand and into mine. "Let's take a few pictures, I want to send a few to our parents, and of course Dean," Y/n said as she began to smile awaiting for me to raise the phone in my hands, and up above us.

She never needed makeup, and I made sure to tell her of that every day, or at least every time I saw her with makeup on. "You look beautiful baby, but you don't need the makeup, because I love you just the way you are. And you, you as your wholesome self in more than enough for me." I said as we looked through the pictures.

Y/n started sending off pictures to people, the cute ones were sent to our parents, the one where we were kissing she posted on one of her social media accounts. The last few ones when we made funny faces she sent to Dean.

If I ever lost her, I think I'd lose my mind. Absolute go crazy, not saying she keeps me from going crazy, she's just the love of my life, and I simply wouldn't know what to do with myself if she was suddenly gone.

Twelve pm. "Come on Sammy! Let's open gifts please!" Y/n says jumping all over the living room. I hummed and sat down on the couch. Y/n pulled a few of my gifts out and grabbed hers. Handing a few small ones and a few bigs ones.

Books, cooking books, a photo album, a few other silly little things, but she still had one box for me. "Here open these honey," I said handing her a few boxes that were wrapped in reindeer wrapping paper. She gushed over the paper and then tore into the gifts.

I too had grabbed her books, a few things from the craft store, and literally anything else she had hinted to during the year. A new necklace because the other was tarnished, a subscription to amazon prime because she has a tendency to buy a lot of things.

She smiled having a few tears in the cusp of her eyes. She rushed up from the floor and jumped into my lap, "Thank you, baby! So much!" I wrapped my hands around her waist to keep her in my lap. She was kissing up a storm on my face, missing either on purpose or accidentally my lips.

We stayed like this for a few moments. Just kissing each other, staying in the moment forever. The kissing wasn't harsh or teeth rode. It was sweet and slow, her lips against mine. Moments like this I memorized her shape and the way her lips tasted against mine.

She rested her head against my chest, and we stayed like this for a few, before she got up and noticed that we both two boxes left. "What do you think we can open them up at the same time?!" So we did, opening them and holding the cute jumpers up in the air at the same time. I could barely see Y/ns eyes over the jumper, then noticed something very cute, and funny.

"Y/n, sweetheart?" I asked she hummed in response. "did.. we got the same gift for each other I think." I said finally I could see Y/n's eyes. She gasped and then giggled. There are other things I'd add to that dictionary, or the book, or whatever.

She giggled and got up running towards the bathroom. "I'm going to go try this on Sammy!"She screamed as she slipped down our hardwood floor and into the bathroom. I went and found the box, the box that had the simple ring it, a set of three diamonds on a gold band.

I heard the clasp of the door open, and then Y/n started talking, on one knee I stayed until Y/n noticed I wasn't answering her back. She looked down at me, then at my hands. Back the jumpers that I was also wearing, "You look cute in your jumper love, so I have a whole speech planned out here. I.. umm... I have spent a large portion of my life loving you from afar, then I got you and I could love you up close you are mine, but I want to be able to wake up next to you forever, I want to continue to make you giggle and laugh, smile at the little things I say to you. I so desperately want to be the father of your kids, have more Christmas like this, so I guess what I'm asking you is simple. Will you Y/n L/n marry me?" I asked her.

No moments of silence she was down on the floor with me, kissing my face repeating 'yes' over and over again. "A hundred times yes, thousand times yes. God, I love you, Winchester. "She said as I slipped the three stones onto her finger.

We kissed again but this just felt different, maybe it was because she wasn't just a girlfriend anymore she is the rest of my life, she's my forever. She is my Mrs. Winchester.

We broke from our kiss, she grabbed her phone and took a picture of course of her hand and then one of us again for the second time. Sending it off yet again. She was happy, and that's all I have ever wanted for her.

Completed on: 05/28/2021

Posted on: 05/28/2021

[mxndoscyarika]

Honeydew (Marcus Pike/Moreno x OC) | Chapter 5

Summary: Erin He moves to DC after working for the FBI in Texas and runs into a hero in disguise; Marcus Moreno. Something about him is familiar, too familiar, yet different in a way that she can’t quite place. Although confused, she can’t deny her feelings for him; perhaps, after years of regret, she finally found the one.

Warnings: winter, food/drink, fluff

Ao3

Honeydew masterlist

Like my writing? Here’s my masterlist.

Author’s Note: Thing are happeninggggggg 👀 Enjoy!

“This place is beautiful, Marcus,” Erin mused, eyes wandering around the restaurant. Like most upscale places, hardwood and chandeliers were the stars of the interior. Perhaps she was a little old-fashioned for liking it, but the atmosphere of dim lights and dark wood was comforting.

“Do you like it?” he asked, a shy smile adorning his face. He didn’t have time to change after work, opting to stay in his button-down shirt and dark pants. Ideally, he would’ve gone home and changed into something a little nicer, just for her, but work had ended later than he anticipated. Thankfully, he wasn’t too underdressed–Erin wore a simple outfit of a dark shirt and skirt, some boots, and a long coat.

Marcus found himself glancing down at her glossy lips as she praised him for picking such a cozy place for their date. There was still a decent amount of snow on the ground, so they didn’t want to travel far. The local steakhouse had seemed like a good option.

Something about the way she spoke, the way she seemed to glow in the soft light of the restaurant, made his heart flutter in his chest. He loved the way her voice soaked into his being, how soothing her tone was. He’d missed that. He’d missed her.

After that day with her and Missy, he couldn’t stop thinking of what a future would be like with her in it. Being in her apartment felt like stepping back in time. It felt like he was being given another chance, another chance to do right by her and show her his l-

“Marcus?”

He blinked, his thoughts slipping to the background. Rubbing his hand along her back soothingly, he asked, “Yes, honey?”

Erin let out a breathy laugh and tilted her head towards the host. “Aren’t you going to let them know we’re here? You said you made a reservation.”

If they were in broad daylight, she would’ve seen his cheeks redden just slightly, Thankfully, she couldn’t. Kissing her forehead, he answered. “Yes, let’s go.”

They were brought to a table situated towards the back of the dining area, menus and glasses of water already waiting. Once again, Marcus slipped past her and pulled out her chair first, making sure she was comfortable before sitting down.

Erin shivered as his hand brushed her shoulder, reminding her of that night in the kitchen.

They quickly fell into conversation, their voices just above an intimate hum. It was nice to have that time with him. She loved having Missy over at her apartment, but she also wanted moments for just herself and Marcus. Maybe it was a tinge of jealousy that remained, or a remnant of fear that he only liked her because she was good with Missy. The thought hadn’t occurred to her until the day after, when one of her parent’s sayings crept back into her mind. But since it had, she couldn’t shake it off.

What if he didn’t really want her? What if he just wanted friendship, or a role model for his daughter? She had no problem with being the latter–every girl deserves to have a role model–but it was the former that she worried about. What if he didn’t want her, and she was going to watch him slip away just like last time?

As she and Marcus sat there, eating and talking about everything and nothing, she felt the coil of insecurity tighten. He told her about his life both before and after becoming a single dad, and how his late wife had encouraged him to pursue his current job.

“And what’s that?” she asked, a small smile on her lips. “You never told me, Mr. Moreno.”

He was about to answer when his phone rang, cutting him off. Frowning, he apologized and told her it was from the headquarters. They rarely called him after hours; normally they reached out to the others. He knew it wasn’t polite to answer during a date, that it was often a sign of disinterest, but Erin insisted that he took the call. Between her time in the FBI and her knowledge of the Heroics, she knew some things couldn’t be ignored.

Hopefully it was just an update.

Then, Marcus’s eyes widened. “I’ll be right there.”

Erin’s brows furrowed at that. “What’s wrong? Is everything okay? Do we need to get Missy?”

Letting out a sigh, he shook his head and fished out his credit card. “The boss called; there’s an emergency and I need to be there as soon as possible.” He stood up and came around to her. Placing his card in her hand, he said, “I’m sorry, honey. This isn’t how I wanted tonight to go. Stay here. I’ll come back for you, alright? I promise I’ll make it up to you.”

“W-wait, why do you have to go?” she asked, heart sinking. “Isn’t there someone else?”

Marcus’s heart broke as he realized what this looked like. He sighed softly and kissed her forehead gently. “I’m the leader of the Heroics, honeydew. I have to.”

Their eyes met, and he hadn’t seen her as sad since the night he left for DC.

“Okay,” she said quietly, letting go of his arm. “Be safe.”

“I’ll come back for you,” he promised. Then he turned on his heel and jogged out of the restaurant.

---

“Erin?”

At the sound of her name, she looked up from her phone. She let out a sigh of relief when she saw Marcus walking towards her, still in his clothes from earlier, though he looked a bit frazzled. Did he not have a suit to change into?

“Marcus,” she breathed, pulling him into a hug. Tucking her face against his neck, she murmured, “I was so worried.”

His arms immediately wrapped around her, enveloping her with warmth. She felt his lips pressing against her temple as he replied, “I’m so sorry, honey. I’m here now. We got everyone out, and the responders are handling the rest.”

“I’m just glad you’re alright. Though I must say, I never pegged you for a superhero,” she said, smiling as he rocked her back and forth. “Though I wish you’d told me earlier during our date. Were you ever going to tell me?”

He cringed. “About that…. I’m sorry our date was interrupted. I know we’ve been looking forward to this for a while, and I shouldn’t have run out on you like that-” “It’s alright,” she interrupted, her voice smooth. Ice-cold air nipped her skin as she pulled away from him. “It wasn’t your fault. I would’ve probably ditched you if there was an emergency at the office.” A soft laugh. “I guess that means we aren’t so different, huh?”

A soft chuckle left his lips. “Yeah, I guess so.”

Those words echoed in his being. Something about holding her in his arms felt right. He never realized how much he missed her touch until she was right there, in his arms, looking up at him with those beautiful eyes. It had been a long time since he felt that warmth in his chest. For a while, since the passing of his wife, he wasn’t sure he would ever feel it again.

He leaned forward just enough that their foreheads touched. “Erin?”

“Yeah?”

It took everything in him to not close the gap between their lips. “I’d like to see you again sometime. Another date, with no interruptions. How does that sound?”

She paused, her breath caught in her throat. Of course she wanted to see him again. Her sweet Marcus, who treated her better in the few weeks they’d known each other than all her past boyfriends and girlfriends combined. Her sweetheart, who came back for her.

A shiver ran down her spine. Her Marcus. How could she forget? Even after nearly a decade, she missed him. And maybe she always would. But, maybe, it was time to let go and leave it all in the past.

Marcus’s voice pulled her out of her thoughts. “Honey?”

She smiled. “It sounds perfect. I just....It’s been a long since I’ve felt anything like this. I told you I don’t have very good luck with love, and…the last time I loved someone, I never told him, and he disappeared before I could.”

“I’m sorry you had to go through that,” he murmured, his breath warm against her cheeks. “We can take things as slow as you want, or not even try at all. But I want to try this with you, Erin. Do you?”

Erin nodded, smiling. “I do.”

“Perfect,” he said, kissing her forehead. “Are you ready to go home?”

“Only if it’s with you.”

The drive back to her apartment was short, the inside of the car nice and toasty in comparison to the brisk winter air. Erin could barely keep a smile off her face when Marcus reached over to hold her hand as he drove.

When she looked over to his side, she noticed the absence of a ring on his left ring finger.

He walked her to her door, a warm hand settled snugly against her back. Their voices echoed through the hallway, soft and oddly familiar.

“Do you want to come inside?”

The door was propped open by her foot, her keys still dangling from her fingers. He nodded, and smiled at the way her face lit up.

“Sorry about the mess,” she began sheepishly, gathering the papers strewn on the dining table into a pile. “I have an undercover op that I need to take care of in a couple weeks, so I was familiarizing myself with the case.”

His brows furrowed as he came up next to her, a hand coming around to rest on her waist. Indeed, the files were maps and profiles. “I thought you didn’t go out in the field anymore.”

She sighed. “I don’t, this was a special request from my boss. I have the most experience, and a leader leads by example, right?” Placing the papers into a folder, she continued, “I still need a partner, though.” “What’s the case?” he asked. Even back in his FBI days,  he didn’t like seeing Erin dressed for an operation. It wasn’t that she didn’t look good–she always looked beautiful–it was that he worried about her. She was capable, strong, and quick on her feet, but accidents could happen. There was no way he was going to risk losing her again; not now, after they finally could be together.

“It’s pretty low-key,” she began, pulling out an overview of the operation. Snuggling closer to him, she explained, “It’s for evidence against an art collector that’s suspected of dealing in the black market. He’s throwing a party on his private island to celebrate the upcoming marriage of his friends. My job is to get in, download some data from his computer, and get out. My plus-one to the wedding festivities is supposed to make things more convincing.”

“Doesn’t sound too bad. I can go with you,” he suggested, his arm tightening around her waist protectively. “If you want. The Heroics don’t need to get involved, it can just be the two of us.”

She turned to face him, eyes wide. “You’d do that for me?”

“Of course,” he answered, holding her close. “Even leaders need some help sometimes.”

“Cheesy,” she teased, leaning in just slightly. Her gaze flickered down to his lips as she turned to face him, the papers forgotten. They looked soft, plush and pink.

His hand came up to cup her cheek.

“Just for you,” he responded, finally bridging the gap between their lips.

His lips were just as soft as they looked.

They melted into each other’s arms, Erin’s arms coming up to wrap around his neck and pull him closer. Her body pressed up against his as their lips molded against each other. Golden calligraphy spelled out their unspoken words as they kissed, gleaming and sparkling.

Erin smiled against his lips when he let out a soft moan, arching into his touch. His large hands roamed across her back, leaving fire in their wake.

He gently coaxed her onto the dining table, settling between her legs. “I’ve been wanting to do this for a very long time.”

“Me too,” she answered breathlessly. “But now we’re together.”

“Yes,” he murmured, kissing her deeply. A shiver ran down his spine as she whimpered into his mouth, so quiet he nearly missed it. He wanted to hear her again. He wanted to hear how his name would sound on her tongue, how she’d sound at her peak, but it was too soon for that. No, he wanted more time with her; he wanted to show her just how much he loved her before taking things to the next level.

His tongue was tracing the seam of her lips when his phone started ringing again. This time, it was an alarm; the babysitter‘s shift was ending soon, which meant he needed to head home–his other home.

Erin let out a small sound of protest as he pulled away, chasing his lips with her own.

Unable to resist, he returned to her. “I’m sorry,” he said, leaning in for another kiss; one that she gladly granted him. His hands came up to cup her face gently, a thumb caressing her bottom lip. Heat surged through him as her lips parted just slightly, allowing the tip of his thumb to catch in the small opening. “I have to go back to Missy, the babysitter needs to leave soon and I don’t want her in the house all alone.”

The mention of Missy brought her back to reality. She didn’t want him to go–not so soon. But his priority was Missy; they could always continue later. Erin nodded understandingly. “It’s okay, Marcus. We’ll find more time soon.”

“Yes,” he agreed, pecking her on the lips. “Soon, I promise.”

---

A long, hot shower was just what she needed after being out in the cold. Erin exited the bathroom, her phone and watch in hand. She was dressed in a black camisole and sweatpants, hair cascading down her back.

As she set her clothes into the hamper, a  glint from her nightstand caught her eye. Upon closer inspection, she realized it was the ring. She’d left it at home for the date, slipping it off her finger as she got ready.

The ring was a memory, a promise. A promise to herself that she would never forget her best friend, her former love. She’d spent countless hours defending it, justifying the purchase and the clear message it sent to people. She’d wanted to tell the world that she’d given her heart away, and that nothing could replace him.

But maybe she didn’t need the ring to remember her Marcus. She knew he’d want her to find someone that made her happy, even if it wasn’t him. He was always sweet like that, supportive and confident. A part of her wondered if he would’ve liked Marcus Moreno. They were both kind, loyal, caring….they were everything she ever wanted. They were patient, understanding. She always longed to have someone–anyone–who would understand her fully. Or even just someone who cared about Erin He, rather than the supervisor He.

Maybe it was time to let Marcus Pike rest in the past. He wasn’t coming back. Even if he was still alive, he never came back for her. He was gone, and no matter how much she missed him, he wasn’t going to come back. No, not in the way she wished for. Only in memories, memories of late-night pancakes and sunny beach trips.

He’d want her to live her life to the fullest, and give and receive love freely.

A small smile on her face, Erin placed the ring back inside it’s velvet box and closed it.

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[wordsablaze]

15~ someone you can trust

tell me your problems (i’ll chase them away) Internal scars can be difficult to deal with but Eskel vows to heal any that Jaskier is weighed down by if it’s the last thing he does…

A/N: okay so i’m sorry it’s been ages but here’s a slightly longer than usual dose of these dorks being in love that i hope compensates :)

previous chapter

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@random-nerd-3 @betaray-jones @w-s-kibela @in-love-with-writing002 @screaming-flapjacks @havenoffandoms @lasaga666 @mayastormborn @alllthequeenshorses @little-piece-of-tamlin @selectivegeekwithstandards

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Eskel wakes in an empty bed.

It’s more than a little disorientating because the last thing he can truly recall is getting onto Scorpion and he has no idea how they got back to the inn - if he really had been that injured and unaware of his surroundings, he doesn’t want to think about how low his chances of getting back in other circumstances would have been.

“Jaskier?” he asks as he bolts upright, then winces as the healing wounds on his back complain that he’s moved too fast. Giving himself a moment to adjust, he rolls his shoulders and swings his legs over the side of the bed.

He doesn’t get a reply, obviously, but Eskel can hear singing from below and he assumes the bard must be performing. He has no idea how Jaskier can perform for several days in a row, especially with his logic that every performance deserves his best efforts, but it’s impressive to say the least.

By the time he gets downstairs, the noise has died down almost entirely, which he’s been around long enough to know means the performance is close to ending. He orders food for both himself and Jaskier before settling at the only empty table, not bothering to ask for a drink because he’s more than sure Jaskier’s rose song will take care of that. And as expected, both Jaskier and two pitchers arrive at the table within the next few minutes.

“Eskel! What are you doing? Aren’t you meant to be resting?” Jaskier asks a little breathlessly before grabbing a drink and promptly finishing most of it.

He shrugs. “I’ve had long enough to rest.”

Jaskier smiles, then notices the plates and his eyes light up. “And you managed to get us food!”

Eskel frowns; he really didn’t think acquiring food would be considered such a hardship. Before he can ask what’s so special about it, Jaskier starts eating and, not wanting to interrupt that, he does the same. Except it’s not the same because Jaskier is doing something odd with his hands, in the sense that he seems to be trying not to do anything with his hands despite eating with them.

“Are you okay?” Eskel blurts.

Jaskier freezes mid-chew and smells like sharp panic for a good few seconds before he shakes his head and swallows, then nods quickly. “Of course. Whatever made you think otherwise, darling? I could not be better!”

Well, that’s not very convincing.

“Jaskier? Why are you lying?”

This time, Jaskier stops eating altogether. He smells like ash and mud and burnt vegetables and Eskel only has enough time to deeply regret his words before Jaskier is gone, an empty mumbled excuse hanging in the air between them as the red of the bard’s doublet disappears through the door.

Eskel curses.

He wants to immediately follow Jaskier like he had last time but he can’t just leave his lute lying around; he deposits it back in their room as fast as possible before leaving the inn, closing his eyes for a moment and letting himself seek out the warm honey and ink that the bard seems to leave a trace of wherever he goes.

Left.

Then right.

And right again.

Through a very narrow alleyway.

Left.

Around a bend.

And past a broken gate.

“Jaskier?” Eskel calls softly, but it’s not like he needs to; he’s in what seems to be an isolated patch of wildflowers and it’s clear which way the bard has run through them. Trusting his instincts, he walks over to the nearest tree and leans against it, sighing softly. “I apologise, bardling, I didn’t mean to… upset you. I was just worried, is all.”

He counts a full minute before Jaskier lands beside him. Literally lands beside him because he’d apparently been in the tree. He blinks, resisting every urge in his body that tells him to jump backwards, and glances over Jaskier, happy to find him uninjured at least.

“I didn’t mean to worry you,” Jaskier says quietly.

“You didn’t,” Eskel says immediately, then shakes his head when Jaskier raises an amused eyebrow at him. “Well, I suppose you did. But I only meant that you don’t need to lie if uh, if you’re not alright.”

Jaskier bites his lip as if he hadn’t considered that and whether or not Eskel had been worried before, he definitely is now. Still, he waits for Jaskier to finish contemplating whatever it is he’s contemplating, unwilling to risk offending him further and ruining yet another of his days - the bitter expression on the bard’s face when he’d thought Eskel was leaving yesterday is still fresh in his memory.

“I wasn’t lying,” Jaskier says eventually, his voice oddly thick, “I’m fine. I’m merely tired from playing for such an unprecedentedly energetic crowd but it's nothing a lovely meal and warm bath won’t fix. In fact, I very recently purchased some lovely rose oils and I simply cannot wait to use them.”

“Why didn’t you just say so back at the inn?” Eskel asks. Ash mixed with lavender. Something bad along with something good. Eskel has no idea what to make of Jaskier’s emotions because the bard himself can’t seem to pick between them.

Surprisingly, Jaskier steps back. “Alright so I may quite possibly be lying now. In truth, I didn’t purchase any rose oils because Alija ran out and I couldn’t bring myself to bother her with a singular order and really, that would take a week and a half at the very least, at which point we’d be long gone and it wouldn’t be worth all the hassle anyway. Did you know there are several different types of rose oils and only two of them are truly suitable for-?”

“Jaskier. Stop, please,” Eskel interrupts.

He stops.

Eskel sighs deeply before offering the bard what he hopes is a reassuring smile. “Did something happen yesterday?”

Jaskier just shrugs, smirking a little.  “Nothing out of the ordinary, really. Giving an excellent performance, saving a ridiculous witcher, acquiring a meal free of charge, the usual results of my endless charm.”

“Then why did you run?” Eskel asks. He hates how this feels like some kind of interrogation but he can’t understand why the bard had gone from enjoying his food to seeking refuge in a tree and he doesn’t want it to become a recurring mystery.

“I don’t… I don’t know?” Jaskier replies eventually, frowning. But when Eskel says nothing because he knows better than to believe that, Jaskier sighs. “I just thought it’d be better if I gave you space. You’re already injured, I didn’t want to make it worse.”

There’s a moment in which Eskel debates on whether or not to tell Jaskier that he’s done nothing but somehow make life impossibly better, but he decides against it for the time being. Instead, he gently nudges Jaskier and shakes his head. “I didn’t need space. It’d have been better if you’d stayed.”

Jaskier blinks at him. “You mean that? Even though I, uhm, lied?”

“You don’t owe me total honesty,” Eskel replies, shrugging, “I was only asking in case there was something I could do to help.”

He doesn’t like the way Jaskier looks as though that’s a foreign concept to him. He also doesn’t like the way he’s immediately filled with the urge to find whoever’s responsible for that and make them regret it - he’s not even sure how he’d do that to be honest.

“As much as I appreciate that, darling witcher, I’m afraid it’s merely a consequence of providing so much bardic goodness to the world, nothing to be done about it. Should we- that is, would you like to return to the inn?” Jaskier asks, and still it’s unclear exactly what emotions he’s experiencing.

Eskel swallows down the instinct to ask anything more and simply holds out his hand. Jaskier hesitates for only a moment before a wide grin spreads on his face - accompanied with the scent of honey and ocean waves so he knows it’s not forced for the sake of politeness - and he slides his fingers into the gaps between Eskel’s.

Gods, he’s addicted to the feel of their hands being connected.

“I ought to thank you,” Jaskier whispers as they begin walking. “I simply have to thank you, really. For- for following me. I can’t say I was expecting it but I greatly appreciate it.”

“How did you learn to climb trees so well?” Eskel asks, unsure of how to react to such gratitude, glad that walking means he doesn’t have to face the heavy sincerity in Jaskier’s eyes.

Jaskier chuckles, squeezing his hand. “How else was I meant to observe the life of witchers without being devoured or torn apart or meeting some other equally ugly end?”

Eskel splutters on nothing in particular, turning to face the bard with wide eyes. Jaskier only raises an eyebrow and tilts his head to the side, and Eskel is abruptly reminded that he’s not the first witcher to be claimed by a bard.

“So you’d… watch from above?”

“Sometimes,” Jaskier replies, turning his head back towards the road, though his gaze seems to go somewhere far beyond the path, into a past that Eskel cannot follow no matter how hard he tries. “It wasn’t always an ideal plan if the monsters could climb too. Or fly.”

He thinks Jaskier’s pulse quickens but it’s back to normal before he can question it, and he wonders - not for the first time but certainly more deeply than he has before - just how different this version of the bard is from the version that Geralt had half-heartedly grumbled about over several winters.

Jaskier gasps sharply as they get back to the inn, letting go of Eskel’s hand and sprinting inside. When he too enters, Jaskier is standing by the table they’d previously occupied, his teeth worrying his lip as he frantically glances around.

“What is it?” Eske asks, concerned by the abrupt shift in mood.

“My lute! I left her behind! Eskel, I left her and she’s gone! Oh, how could I have been so careless? Stupid, stupid, stupid-”

“Wait, wait. Jaskier, your lute’s back in our room,” Eskel interjects, placing a hand on his arm and gently pulling his hand out of his hair where he’d started to pull on it.

“Back in our… what?” Jaskier trails off, predictably heading straight for the stairs as soon as the words register.

This time, he enters the room to see Jaskier kneeling on the floor, cradling his lute to his chest as if it were his child. Not that Eskel has much knowledge of what it’s like to cradle or be cradled but he’s been alive long enough to gather as much.

“I can never thank you enough,” Jaskier declares when their eyes meet.

Eskel’s face heats up and he shrugs, shutting the door behind him. “It was the least I could do, bardling.”

“You are impossibly considerate, my darling,” Jaskier says in the same no-argument tone, placing the lute down gently before rising to his feet and throwing himself at Eskel, his arms looping around the witcher’s neck.

None of Vesemir’s training had ever prepared him for anything like this.

“Your… your darling?” Eskel echoes. He knows Jaskier had referred to him as his witcher before but that was halfway in jest and regardless, to be known as someone’s witcher is hardly the same as to be known as someone’s darling.  

Jaskier pulls back, his palms settling against Eskel’s cheeks, the tips of his fingers sliding ever so nicely into his hair. “Are you alright with that?” he asks, his breath just about brushing over Eskel’s lips.

Eskel is honestly too busy wondering what he’s supposed to do with his hands to consider the concept properly. Thankfully, Jaskier seems to realise that and his sour-scented nerves dissolve into amusement, the corners of his eyes crinkling as he smiles warmly, his thumbs tracing small curves under Eskel’s eyes. “I’ll let you think further on that, shall I?”

He doesn’t get a chance to reply as being overly aware of how close they are means Eskel can clearly feel as Jaskier winces, even though his face barely gives his discomfort away. He frowns, covering Jaskier’s hands with his own and guiding them down between them, stepping back a little as he does.

“You’re hurt?” Eskel asks; Jaskier’s fingertips are red and warm to the touch and judging by the guilty expression on the bard’s face, that isn’t exactly normal.

“I- It happens. It’s only painful when I play for rather extended periods of time. I may have also used up the last of the salve I had without checking to see whether I would be able to acquire any more but it’s nothing serious, I promise,” Jaskier explains, pulling his hands out of Eskel’s grip.

Not that Eskel lets him, tightening his hold on Jaskier’s wrists only enough to keep them in place as he hums thoughtfully. “I might have a solution for that.”

Jaskier’s curiosity seems to outweigh any doubts he has and he shrugs. “Alright then, do your worst.”

“I’ll do my best for you, bardling,” Eskel chuckles, sitting down cross-legged in front of the bed and waiting until Jaskier does the same, which doesn’t take long on account of their hands still being connected.

Eskel lets go of Jaskier’s left hand and places both hands around his right one, guiding him into curling a fist and slowly letting it go again until his fingers are flat, stretched out. He repeats the process several times until Jaskier’s confusion fades into acceptance, then gently squeezes his hand reassuringly.

He finally takes his eyes off Jaskier and the bright awe in his eyes as he keeps one hand around the bard’s wrist to steady him and uses the other to gently rub circles into his first knuckle, moving along to the next after a few moments. Jaskier’s breath hitches as his fingers brush the calluses on his fingers and Eskel pauses, forcing his hand to slow down lest he ends up causing pain instead of relieving it.

It would be nothing short of a crime, he thinks, to be trusted with the hands of bard and break that trust by compromising their ability to play. In fact, the weight of trust Jaskier is placing in him by letting him, a witcher who more often than not uses his hands to create violence as opposed to comfort, do as he pleases lies heavy on his shoulders.

“Sorry,” he murmurs, moving onto the next finger and going a little more softly this time. There’s an unfamiliar scent around them, something quiet and golden and herbal, but Eskel doesn’t let his focus waver, making his way along each finger until he’s done, then carefully tugging on each one to stretch them and watching as Jaskier exhales, his shoulders relaxing.

Jaskier starts to pull his hand back as they both pause for a moment but Eskel laces their fingers together and shakes his head. “We’re only getting started yet,” he says quietly.

“My mistake,” Jaskier mumbles back, an easy smile playing at his lips.

Eskel uses their interlaced fingers to flex Jaskier’s wrist, slowly bending it in every direction before taking his hand back, stroking from the tips of his fingers to the edge of his palm, smiling each time Jaskier’s hand instinctively curls and he has to pull his fingers back. Jaskier seems to find it just as amusing as him, both of them laughing quietly when it happens for the fourth time and it seems like he’s simply attempting to steal Eskel’s thumb.

He flips Jaskier’s hand over and traces invisible paths from his nails to his wrist and back again. When he moves on to the skin between each finger, Jaskier gasps, not in pain but in something like surprise. Eskel waits for him to nod his approval before continuing, then repeating his earlier sequence of working his way down each knuckle, this time taking special care to focus on his fingertips and gently relax them.

“Almost there,” he murmurs as he moves his attention to Jaskier’s wrist, once again flexing his hand before rubbing upwards from the base of his palm. Jaskier shivers as Eskel’s fingertips run along his arm, his eyes falling shut as he leans his head back against the bed, the air around them filling with what must be the scent of sunbeams themselves.

When Eskel is satisfied that he’s made a difference, he laces their fingers together again and squeezes gently, letting Jaskier take his time to react. And take his time he does; Eskel is beginning to suspect he’s fallen asleep to the feeling of Eskel’s thumb tracing patterns onto his hand when Jaskier finally opens his eyes.

“How did you learn to do this?” Jaskier whispers, his voice ever so quiet and thick with a gratitude that Eskel’s not sure he deserves for something so simple.

Eskel shrugs. “Just here and there.”

“You amaze me,” Jaskier says, and Eskel can smell nothing but genuine admiration in his voice; he has to look away so he doesn’t do anything to embarrass himself.

He’s internally very pleased that he’d managed to help though. It only feels right to have been of some comfort after Jaskier had managed to get him back to a bed in one piece yesterday and although he’s not even remotely well-versed in articulating his appreciation, at least he can pay some of that concern back.

Jaskier pokes his forehead.

“What-?” Eskel manages, jerking back a little.

Not very successfully holding back a grin, Jaskier shrugs. “You were frowning again. What else was I meant to do?”

Eskel blinks slowly, then lets himself laugh. He’s half-aware that it wasn’t quite funny enough to warrant the way he laughs so hard that he almost starts struggling to breathe but he’s lost in the freedom of this casual hysteria for longer than he’ll later admit to and, in the moment, he can’t bring himself to feel bad about it.

When he recovers, there’s a sparkle in Jaskier’s eyes that hints at something dangerous, something like fondness, something that Eskel wants to keep close for as long as possible. And if he is to take Jaskier for his word, keeping it - keeping him - close is actually far from impossible. What a strange and hopeful prospect.

“I find myself needing to thank you once again, Eskel. I already feel a hundred times better,” Jaskier says, pulling his hand free and flexing his fingers gently as he stretches his legs out in front of him.

Eskel raises an eyebrow, holding his hand out with the palm facing upwards. “Your other hand, if you wouldn’t mind. I’m not done.”

“Oh,” Jaskier whispers, biting his lip for a moment. “Are you sure you have time?”

“I’m meant to be resting anyway, aren’t I?” Eskel asks.

At that, Jaskier’s expression brightens once more and he nods. “Yes, of course you are. I suppose this works out for the best then, doesn’t it?”

It does, but their reasoning is likely very different. Eskel doesn’t comment on that, simply shifting so he’s facing Jaskier, taking his hand and starting the same way he had before, curling his fingers into fists before stretching them out again.

Since he’s more aware of how much pressure to apply this time, his left hand is a much quicker process than the right. Again, both of them laugh as Jaskier’s fingers automatically wrap around Eskel’s thumb when he moves it over his palm. And again, both of them smile as Jaskier’s breath hitches when Eskel’s fingers brush over his calluses. But this time, Jaskier doesn’t make a sound as Eskel finishes up by lacing their fingers together, and the air around them is neither warm nor golden, unexpectedly salted.

Eskel glances up sharply to see Jaskier using his free hand to push tears away from his eyes. He lets go of Jaskier’s hand immediately, shuffling backwards as his stomach drops. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you. What did I do wrong?”

Jaskier lets out a noise that would land somewhere between a laugh and a sob before shaking his head. “No, no no no. It wasn’t- I mean, nothing hurts. I… I’ve been a bard since I was a child and nobody has ever… Nothing has ever helped like this.”

Oh.

Eskel doesn’t know what to say to that. He doesn’t even try to think of anything, just silently moves so that he’s propped against the bed too, his arm leaning against Jaskier’s as he too stretches out his legs in front of him. Wordlessly, Jaskier takes his hand, squeezing carefully before his head lands on Eskel’s shoulder; Eskel tenses for a second before exhaling and forcing his muscles to relax again, adjusting so Jaskier’s head is in a comfortable position.

“You have my utmost thanks but I think I’m going to fall asleep now,” Jaskier mumbles.

“I don’t mind,” Eskel whispers. He thinks he should mind in some way or the other but he also just doesn’t have any reasoning that’s good enough to refuse the honour of acting as a pillow.

Granted, It feels a little strange to remain as still as possible whilst the bard dozes off but really, it’s nothing he hasn’t done before when various animals - usually goats - have fallen asleep in his lap or on his limbs. Although he’s almost certain that no other experience, no matter how small or adorable the animals may be, will ever compare to the soft and gratifying weight of Jaskier seeking comfort in his presence.

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shout out and thank you to @jayjayjayne for being absolutely lovely and inspiring the idea of a hand massage - i hope i did it justice <3

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thanks for reading! masterlist | witcher sideblog: @itsjaskier​ | next chapter

[twomoonstwosuns]

cold.

back to you [series masterlist]

previous part · next part 

pairing: professor!poe dameron x reader

warnings: swearing, mentions of sex, things are getting a bit angsty

word count: 2.8k

a/n: an actual chapter without smut? i’m shocked. don’t worry, it’ll be back. in the mean time enjoy something that’s supposed to hurt a little bit. feedback is always appreciated!

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“I’m just saying, if they’re not going to salt the sidewalks, they should put all classes online. I can’t be the only one who’s tired of almost dying on my way to class. It’s a lawsuit waiting to happen.”

Kaydel always had something to complain about. Whether it was the weather or a certain person, there was always something. You had to agree with her on this, though. The semester had just started and the both of you had nearly wiped out on the slippery sidewalks. Twice.

The warmth of the building engulfed you like a warm blanket. At least they were keeping the buildings comfortable so you wouldn’t be shivering all through class. Walking into your classroom, you scanned the seats and found one of your friends sitting in the middle of the room. Only you hadn’t exactly expected to see him.

“Snap Wexley, on time to class. I never thought I’d see the day.”

You’d met Snap your freshman year. He lived on the same floor as you and your freshman roommate Karé and they started dating soon after. Between that and the close proximity of your dorm rooms, not to mention the shared secrecy of sneaking alcohol in, you became close friends.

“Well, we’re graduating in a few months, thought I’d make an effort as my parting gift.” He said as you settled into the seat next to him, removing your winter layers. “So…”

Snap was looking at you expectantly. You gave him a look back.

“My break was great, thanks for asking.” You said. “No, I didn’t forget.”

Snap smiled victoriously while Kaydel just looked confused.

“My mom made cookies for me to bring back for Snap.” You explained before turning back to Snap. “They’re at my apartment. Not only did she make you some, she made you a whole plate and I have to call her and have you tell her that you got them.”

“Tell your mom I love her.”

“Tell her yourself.”

“How does Snap know your mom?” Kaydel asked.

“Both his and Karé’sparents couldn’t come to parents weekend freshman year so my mom ‘adopted’ them for the day and they bonded. Now he’s like the son she never had. She dotes on him. And my sister’s husband Chris. My mom always wanted a son and got two girls instead.”

“So, if you don’t get married…”

“Then Snap and Karéget my place at the dinner table.”

“Your mom is definitely invited to me and Karé’s wedding.” Both your and Kaydel’s eyes widened at the insinuation and you stared at Snap with open mouths. He spoke before you could. “I haven’t proposed. Yet. I’m just saying.”

You shook your head in disbelief.

“You jackass.” You muttered, hitting his shoulder. “I can’t believe you made me think that—“

“Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen…”

Your head snapped to the front of the room at the familiar voice. There was Poe, setting his brown leather bag next to the desk. Your pulse quickened and you stole a look from Kaydel, wondering if you had somehow misread your schedule and ended up in the wrong classroom.

“For those who haven’t had my class before, I’m Professor Dameron. I know this is supposed to be Professor D’Acy’s class, but she’s been ordered to be on bed rest until her due date in April, so I’ll be taking her class this semester.”

You gulped, anxiety creeping in. You were not prepared to see him today. How were you going to be able to sit there and concentrate when his mouth had done so many different and pleasurable things to you just two days ago?

“Y/N, you good?” Kaydel was looking at you questioningly and you realized you had been caught staring at Poe. He had removed his own coat and was looking waytoo good wearing a button down shirt with the sleeves rolled up and the top two buttons undone. You were convinced the universe was out to get you.

“Yeah…” Not even you were convinced. You dragged it out as long as you could without raising suspicion as you gathered your thoughts. “Sorry, I’m a little surprised. D’Acy’s my advisor, I was just talking to her the other day and she seemed fine. I hope everything’s ok.”

“I’m sure it’s precautionary.” Snap interjected.

“Agreed, better safe than sorry.” Kaydel said. “I’ve heard Dameron’s a great teacher though. Plus, he’s gonna be really nice to look at for the next four months.”

You nodded slowly in agreement. She and every other female would probably be ogling him, so you’d blend right in. In a weird way, it was a reassuring thought. Poe took a pile of papers from his bag and handed them to the front row, having them pass them down to every student. He then brought out the class list and started taking attendance, seeing some familiar faces from the previous semester. He already knew their preferred nicknames and made small talk with them as he marked them in attendance. It made you smile. Poe really did make an effort to have a friendly banter with his students. It was just one of the many reasons why he was one of the most popular teachers on campus.

“Kaydel Connix.”

Kaydel voiced her presence and Poe looked up to put a face to her name. That was when he took notice of you. You had busied yourself with trying to get your pen to work to avoid catching his eye, unsure of how you’d react, but you could very briefly feel his eyes rake over you. He continued down the list and you felt on edge as he neared the first letter of your last name.

“Y/N Y/L/N, I know I saw you here.”

You waved your hand and Poe caught your eye, giving you a soft smile.

“Nice to see you again,” he said as he marked your attendance. You returned the smile.

“You too, sir.”

You mentally slapped yourself for calling him ‘sir’ in a room full of people, the heat of embarrassment beginning to cover your cheeks. Then you saw his shoulders tense and curiosity got the best of you. You wondered, based on his reaction, if there was a kink you didn’t know about, and the thought of it made you bite the inside of your cheek to keep from giggling. Poe managed to hide his reaction well as he continued with attendance and you blew out a sigh of sweet relief.

“You’ve had his class before?” Kaydel whispered. You nodded as you took one of his syllabi. “So is it true, is he a really good teacher?”

He’s good at more than just teaching, you thought as you assured her. When Poe was done taking attendance, he dived into going over the syllabus. It was tedious, and he told the class as such, but necessary seeing as this wasn’t even supposed to be his class. He went through it page by page, answering questions along the way and giving details about certain assignments and days when you wouldn’t have class.

Poe dismissed the class after the hour and a half was up. You followed Kaydel and Snap out but lingered, deciding at the last minute to see if you could get a minute with him. Kaydel noticed you weren’t right behind her and gave you a questioning look.

“You go ahead,” you said loud enough for Poe to hear. “I have to ask Professor Dameron about getting ahold of one of my assignments for my portfolio. I’ll see you later.”

She nodded and left and you turned towards Poe, carefully approaching his desk.

“Question for you.”

“Answer.”

Poe watched the last student walk out the door before turning to give you his full attention. He leaned against the desk, folding his arms across his chest and exhaling quietly.

“Is this going to make things weird?” You dropped your voice to a quieter octave in case anyone came back in. “I mean, this has been working really well and I think part of that is because we didn’t see each other much in public.”

“I don’t think so. Not if we make it weird.” You were still hesitant and Poe sensed it. “Was I surprised to see you today? Yeah. Did I have to remind myself to not stare too long at you? Definitely, but I think going forward it’ll be ok because I won’t be caught off-guard seeing your gorgeous face every other day.”

You weren’t sure if he meant to call you gorgeous out loud. Pet names other than what came out in the heat of the moment was an unspoken agreement to be off-limits. Regardless, you couldn’t help the way the corners of your mouth began to turn up.

“So, you don’t want to stop?” The question was out of your mouth before you could stop it. Of course you didn’t want to stop sleeping with him, but maybe this was a sign. Since Thanksgiving break, there were more stolen glances and subtle touches anytime you “casually” ran into him in a setting that allowed a closer proximity.

“Of course not.” Poe answered without hesitation. Your shoulders relaxed with his reassurance. “Do you?”

“Not at all.”

“Then we won’t make it weird.” Poe said softly. You nodded. “I’m not gonna lie, I’m really happy I get to see you more, even if it’s just across a classroom.”

You felt your cheeks heat up. Despite your relationship being strictly physical, Poe always found little ways to make your heart beat just a little bit quicker.

“Me too.”

“You’ll just have to make sure you’re not thinking too much about what we’ve been doing.” You rolled your eyes as he chuckled. “Hey, I saw you staring earlier.”

“I know how good your mouth is.” You said. “And even if I do get caught, at least I won’t be the only female in the room thinking about you.”

Your teasing tone made him blush and an easy smile started to form on his face. While he was only crude while talking to you, Poe was actually an extremely modest person. Confident, but humble.

“Does this mean you’re taking over as my advisor as well?”

“Only if you want.” Poe said, rounding the corner of the desk to start packing things up. “D’Acy told me she’ll be reaching out to her advisees via email about the semester, but with nothing to do on bed rest I’m sure she’d be more than happy to stay on as your advisor. Her words, not mine.”

“I may take you up on that. I’ve got some pretty heavy classes this semester since it’s my last one. I guess it wouldn’t hurt to have the expertise of twogreat professors. If you don’t mind, of course.”

“I don’t mind at all.”

“Cool,” you said, giving him an appreciative smile as you fidgeted with the strap of your backpack. “I have a class soon, but I’ll let you know what D’Acy says.”

Poe nodded as you walked away. Relief flooded your body at how that conversation played out. You felt that maybe you could make it through this semester. You had almost made it to the door when he spoke again.

“Oh, and Y/N?”

Poe beckoned you back over with his finger. He looked up at you from under his lashes and you could see how dark his eyes had gotten, leaning forward onto the desk when you were back to standing in front of it.

“Call me ‘sir’ one more time and I’ll have no choice but to bend you over this desk and take you right here.”

His voice was quiet and rough; it was exactly the tone of voice he knew turned you on. Anyone who could see you now would catch on pretty quick that there was something between the two of you. You took a daring step forward, placing your hand next to his on the desk, your fingers just barely touching his but the electricity crackling between you.

“Tempting.” You glanced behind you, seeing two students walking in. Luckily, they were caught up in their own conversation so they didn’t see how close you were to Poe. You pulled your hand away and backed away from the desk. “We’ll make it happen.”

You shot him a wink and he gave you a public-approved tight-lipped smile, though his eyes shined with mischief. The ghost of a smile was still on your face when you approached the door of the building.

“Y/N.”

You stopped in your tracks, the smile disappearing from your face as another familiar voice stopped you. You looked behind you and saw the last person you expected to see; your father. Your brow furrowed in confusion and you whatever good mood you were in after leaving Poe’s class vanished instantly.

“What are you doing here?”

“You weren’t answering my calls.” He spoke softly, as if he were comforting you.

“That should’ve been a hint that I don’t want to talk to you.” You spat. “What do you want?”

“To talk.”

“There’s nothing to talk about. You left. That itself was a pretty clear message.”

“I want to explain.”

“I’m really not interested in hearing whatever bullshit excuse you’ve come up with about you and mom ‘growing apart’ or whatever. Besides, I have to go to class.”

“Then I’ll wait and we’ll get dinner. You owe me that much.”

You had started to turn away, but those five words made you whip around, anger flashing across your face. You approached him, standing face to face with your father. Your tone was laced with venom.

“I owe you? I don’t owe you anything. You broke our hearts. You left without an explanation and mom, Tallie, and I were left behind wondering why. And for what? The secretary you were banging? We blamed ourselves for weeks when we found out. So no, I don’t owe you a damn thing. In fact, the only thing owed is the respect of not making me stand here and listen to your excuse.”

“Honey, I’m sorry—“

“I don’t want to hear it.” Your voice started to shake and you willed yourself to keep it together, especially because people were staring as they passed. “I don’t want to talk to you. I don’t want to see you. Stop trying and leave me alone.”

Your father grabbed your forearm as you made to walk away for the final time.

“Let go of me.”

“Y/N, please—“

“Is everything ok?”

You didn’t even acknowledge Poe stepping up to you, so you didn’t see the concern evident on his face. You kept your eyes locked on your father, trying like hell to convey every message of resentment and sorrow you were feeling.

“Y/N?”

It was a stand-down to see who would budge first. No words were spoken. Your father’s eyes were pleading and yours were cold, emotionless with a fiery wrath burning behind them.

“Everything’s fine,” you said coldly, yanking your arm out of your father’s grip. “I have to get to class.”

You turned your back on the tow men, walking swiftly out of the building. Anger consumed you. You stopped where the sidewalk divided and, in a split second decision, went left and headed towards your apartment instead of going to class.

How dare he? You hadn’t heard much from your father since he walked out on your family and then had the audacity to come to your school and let himself explain as if you owed him that much. A million different thoughts ran through your head, all coming back to why. Why did he think he could win your forgiveness back after one dinner? It was then you realized that he never actually apologized.

Your hands were shaking so much that it took you three tries to get your key into the lock of your apartment door. You stepped inside and slammed the door shut, the sound echoing through the empty apartment. Your backpack fell to the floor and you didn’t bother to take your snow-covered coat off. You sunk down onto the living room couch, your chest constricting and your breathing become increasingly fast.

You wanted to just be angry. You wanted to yell and throw things and then be done with it, done with him. But you weren’t just angry.

You choked out a sob and dropped your head into your hands, the hurt still as raw as it was six months ago.

tag list [open!] - @ah-callie

[mindingmyownbusiness]

Rescue (5/?)

Pairing - Bucky x Reader Soulmate AU Summary - You’ve always believed your soulmate was out there somewhere, Bucky not so much. What happens when he finally takes a leap of faith and reaches out to you? Warnings - some canon-typical violence in later chapters, the occasional curse word, but I promise to make up for it with loads of fluffiness Chapter Word Count - 1798 Notes - Posting has gone from once a week to super sporadic lol (sorry everyone!). My goal is currently to have it finished before school starts in a few weeks. Inspired by Rescue by Lauren Daigle and by a lot of the concepts in Sense8.

Series Masterlist - Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4

...a few weeks later...

“Dogs or cats?” Bucky was leaning back against his headboard, idly flipping a knife as he listened for your answer.

“Hmmm… that’s a tough one. I’m gonna say cats for right now, dogs later when I have a bigger place. I’d feel bad leaving a pupper cooped up in here while I’m at work.” You rinsed your plate and set it in the drying rack, moving to drain the sink and reaching for a dishtowel.

“I get that. Been thinking of getting a cat myself. It’d be nice to have around but would also drive Sam crazy, win-win. Your turn, Y/N.”

“Any broken bones?” You asked as you hung the dishtowel up and headed to get ready for bed.

Bucky barely stifled a laugh. “More than I care to count, doll, ribs and fingers mostly. Comes with the job.”

You try to picture him shrugging his shoulders like what he said was no big deal as you finish washing your face, shaking your head as the image fails you. “Wow… I forget how dangerous your job is sometimes…” you whispered the last bit to yourself but you knew he had to have heard you.

Not willing to let you dwell on that thought, Bucky presses forward, “How ‘bout you, hmm? Break an arm maybe? Collarbone...?”

“Nope, not a single one actually. I did have to get stitches once but I was so young I don’t remember it. Busted my face on the corner of a table when I was a toddler. Still have the scar.” You peer closer into your bathroom mirror, gently running a finger over the thin white line.

“Ouch… maybe we’ll compare scars one day..”

Bucky sheaths his knife, turning out his bedside lamp and slipping under his sheets, staring up at the ceiling with his hands behind his head. Meanwhile you’ve slipped into your pjs and climbed into bed as well, a comfortable silence enveloping you both as you tuck into a ball under your covers. Your mind begins to wander, the dark and the quiet opening doors to thoughts and questions that typically remain dormant during the light of day.

“Hey Bucky?”

“Yeah, doll?”

“Can I ask you a hard question?”

“Sure…” His heartbeat picked up, suddenly wary of what you were about to ask.

“Did um… w-were you one of the ones that got dusted?” 

He let out a slow breath, the memories of that terrible day playing back in his mind. “Yeah… not the most comfortable feeling.”

“Same. I remember… I remember being so confused and then… nothing. Until we all blipped back that is. Adjusting to a world that went on without you for five years hasn’t exactly been a walk in the park.”

“Tell me about it…” he murmurs, his thoughts going much further back than the five short years you both lost, the statement ringing with more truth than he was ready to admit yet.

You clear your throat, “Well, I certainly ruined the mood.” Laughing nervously you forge on. “Time for a new topic, I think it’s your turn...?”

“Sure, let’s see…  how are things at work?”

“It’s alright, nothing exciting really. It’s not my dream job or anything, but it pays the bills and the girls I work with are pretty nice so there’s that. How about you? I’m sure your job and the people you work with are a thousand times more interesting than what I’ve got going on.”

Bucky smiles fondly, “Well you already know Sam, can’t live with him, can’t work without him. He’s fun to mess with but I couldn’t ask for a better friend or partner… not since my last one anyway... But Sam’s not nearly as reckless as Steve. Steve was a handful in the best of times, always looking for a fight but in a good way, never backed down when he knew it was the right thing to do… Feels like I’ve been watching his back my whole life…”

“Sounds like you two were close? Did he… did something happen...?”

“Oh yeah he ah.. he sorta retired..? Just decided he was tired of putting his life on hold for the next mission. I supported him but it was still hard to see him go.”

“That’s very noble of you Bucky. You are an amazing friend and partner. He was so lucky to have you.” The admiration and pride in your voice is unmistakable. 

Not one for taking compliments well, a flustered Bucky attempts to lighten the situation. “Life goes on right? The world may be getting weirder every day, especially since everyone came back, but I think I’ve found my place in it.”

“That’s so good to hear… I still feel a bit out of place, most of my friends survived the blip and are just in completely different places in their lives than I am. We still talk but I don’t think it’ll ever be the same…” You pulled your blanket tighter around yourself, snuggling deeper into your nest and shaking off the negative thoughts clouding your mind.  “So, tell me more about Sam, what makes him so fun to mess with?”

Bucky can’t help but laugh, “Literally everything. He’s so dramatic and it’s way too easy to push his buttons. Just the other day, we were training and he was working on throwing his shie---umm I mean this new sort of weapon and I mayyyy have been telling him the wrong thing just so it would knock him on his ass. Laughed about that for days.” 

You found yourself laughing right along with him, eventually ending with a sweet sigh. “What I wouldn’t give to see you smile...”

Bucky stops laughing abruptly and you immediately know you’re the cause of the sudden tension between you. Unlike previous times however you resolve not to cave or opt for the awkward smooth-over. Time to face your fears, Y/N.

“Bucky, part of me desperately wants to apologize for saying that but honestly, the rest of me isn’t sorry at all. I really do want you to be totally comfortable with me and I know I promised not to push you but… I need you to know that seeing you, eventually touching and being with you is something I genuinely want. I mean how could I not want that with the man that I lo--” the words stuck in your throat as you caught yourself, “...th-that I’m meant to be with? You’re my soulmate Bucky, you have to know what that means to me, to us.”

Bucky felt like he was torn in two, reluctant to admit that the thought of letting you all the way in was getting to be as stressful as keeping you out but then again he was the stubborn type. “It’s not just about you seeing me doll, it’s about what seeing me will mean, it’s about my whole life and all the crazy that it entails.”

“You know… you know you can be honest with me right? I can handle it, I promise. There is literally nothing that you could tell me that would drive me away from you, okay? Nothing.”

“How can you promise me that?. You can’t possibly mean it. You don’t know… you don’t know my whole story. It’s not a pretty one.” You can feel his walls going up but you can’t hold it in any longer. It’s now or never...

“What if…” you swallow nervously, “w-what if I told you I did know. That I know you better than you think I do...” 

Your words flowed like ice through his veins. “What are you saying Y/N?” 

“I-I started to put two and two together almost immediately, as soon as you told me your name. It’s not that common you know....” He’s so quiet you wonder if he has stopped breathing. Knowing there’s no turning back you continue, “And there were so many little things that kept adding up: that you were so reluctant to let me see you, how you told me you used to be military but now you work in security... that you live and train with Sam, Sam Wilson right? Or that time you were out of contact for a week and the story broke about the Falcon and the Winter Soldier taking down that terrorist cell? I know that was you Bucky, I’m not crazy.”

You took a deep breath, calming down a bit. “Did you really think your soulmate would be that clueless? That the person meant to be with you. a literal Avenger, wouldn't be able to figure it out? I’m not upset with you, I promise. It's not like you lied to me, everything you said was ‘technically’ the truth. But... the more I learned about you the more I confirmed my hunch and the more I felt like I was lying to you, and that just didn’t sit well with me.”

Silence was all you could hear on Bucky’s end but you knew he was still there. You gnawed at your lower lip worried that you had made a horrible mistake. “I wanted to come out and just tell you, so many times, but at the same time I had promised not to push you. I was waiting for you to be ready to tell me but I was also starting to worry that it was never going to happen. Bucky I’m so sorry, I--”

Bucky blurted out, “Why are you still here then?! You should have shut me out already. How could finding out not change how you felt about me? Y/N, I’m not just some guy with a military past and a job that takes me away for days, weeks, sometimes months at a time, that’s enough to put a strain on any relationship. But I’m also over a hundred years old, I deal with literal alien threats, and a-and I’ve killed so many people… those memories, the things they did to me, that part of my life is a literal hellhole, and it doesn’t go away, ever. It’s always with me… all those years without memories and now I’d give anything to forget…” You could hear his labored breathing, the anguish in his voice. Tears welled up in your eyes for him, ashamed that you’d hurt him but also desperate to be the one to comfort him. “Y/N I’m-- I’m sorry, I have to go. I need some space right now.” 

“Wait Bucky, don’t---” and just like that the connection severs. Not completely thank goodness, you can still sense your bond deep down, but you feel as though a chasm has formed between the two of you.

“I’m not going anywhere Bucky… I love you...” you whisper into the silence, hoping somewhere, somehow that he can still hear you.

Part 6

Taggy tag tags: @bucky-plums-barnes @buckyywiththegoodhair @avengerofyourheart @sebspocketsquare @sgtbxckybxrnes @bionic-buckyb  @plumfondler @imaginingbucky @sexonastickstan @angryschnauzer @witchymarvelspacecase @palaiasaurus64 @eyecandybarnes @promarvelfangirl @the-observant-fangirl @ballyhoobarnes @trinityjadec @kjs-s @sebbytrash @true-queen-of-mischief @buckthegrump @moondancewrites @thisisjamesbarnes @beccaanne814 @oneshot-shit @moonbeambucky @stevieang @tnupsweetpie @avenger-nerd-mom @eyesfixedonthesun22 @searchingforbucky @notimetoblog @sugarfreecapsicle @nomadicpixel @nacho-bucky @sarahwroteathing @captain-rogers-beard @buckys-darling @tilltheendwilliwrite @ifellinnthepit

@marie-is-in-the-dark @lorilane33 @igothroughphasesalot

[thenootshoot]

Professor (Sigma x Reader) Chapter 4

Triggers include:

Past abuse/mention of rape, smoking/vaping, suicidal thoughts

A week had passed since that day. You and Professor de Kuiper - er - Siebren, had grown closer. He always made sure you were okay, "accidentally" forgetting to give you an assignment or two in that time. It helped take your stress away, and you sure as hell felt a lot better than before, but you knew it wasn't over. After all, your dad still lingered in your mind.

Your mind always went back to the first incident. You didn't know it was abuse at the time though. It wasn't until you entered middle school that you realized something was wrong. You thought everyone else was dragged around their house by their hair. You thought everyone had a paddle on the wall in case they were bad. You thought everyone had to throw away or burn every drawing they made and every coloring book they owned when they didn't get perfect scores on their school work. It was all you knew, dating as far back as kindergarten. At least that's what you remember.

"Are you certain? I can bring you back something."

Why was he so damn nice to you?

"No thanks professor. I know I don't eat a lot but if I force myself to, I'll get sick." You had to force a smile. "I'd rather focus on saving enough money for a dorm. Winter will be hectic otherwise."

Siebren sighed, slightly frustrated, but he understood. "Alright (y/n). Stay safe." He then headed out to the parking lot to drive off campus for lunch.

You headed for your car. You spent a lot of time there. It was very comforting in there, especially when you were at a low. Like right now. Sure, it felt good to get stuff off your chest about your dad, but you didn't get it all out. There was so much you still needed to tell him. God why did you want to tell your professor everything? Why couldn't you just talk to the damn counselor? It's not like Siebren was able to help you. He barely knew anything about the human mind!

You grabbed your vape from the center console, taking a puff and letting the smoke fill the air around you. You hated this habit of yours, but you couldn't help it. You didn't know how else to escape. Drugs were definitely a no. Alcohol...Well, that was for the very low times. The moments you wanted to forget the next day. Smoking was what you had found useful, but you went through cigarettes so quickly and they were getting more and more expensive. Vaping. That was your comfort now.

"God dammit..." You mumbled to yourself. "Why won't you just go away?"

More smoke filled the air, and your lungs. You wanted out of this all. You'd considered this multiple times before, but right now, it was so strong. Nicotine was killing you slowly but you wanted that death to come sooner. You wanted it now. You wanted the pain to go away. You wanted the world to disappear with your memories.

More smoke.

The tears came back. Not nearly as bad as last week, but by God's name they were bad. Your body began to shake. His voice appeared in your mind. The same words over and over again. I would never hurt you baby girl. You just have to listen and do what I say. If you don't, you'll wish you were dead. And you always listened to him. You God forsaken abusive father. The only male figure in your life from the moment your mother passed until..well...until you met Siebren. Your father made sure you never had or came into contact with a male teacher. He wanted no one else to top him. He only wanted you to know him and love, no, worship him. He'd do everything he could to make it happen.

"Go away..."

That night was one you would never forget. You thought you were free. You weren't. In school, you had met a boy. He was nice to you. Nicer than your father had been. At least you thought. You gave him all your love, eventually letting his existence known in front of your dad. The rage you saw...You'll never get over that. The breaking of the bottle on your head. The feeling of the belt against your face and body. The reopening of wounds. You remember it all. But above all, you remember the gun. That gun was your savior and nightmare. You never thought you'd be held at gunpoint by your own father. Yet you had been. And when he pulled the trigger...

Your hand moved to your neck, a visible scar where the bullet had sliced you open.

That same gun is what killed your father. After shooting you, he turned the gun to himself, sticking it in his mouth and pulling the trigger without hesitation. You regret crying so much over him, but he was all you knew. You were lucky your boyfriend had been planning to sneak in the house. He was the one who found the both of you. He was the reason you were alive today. You wish he hadn't come. You went to live with him when you got out of the hospital. He was worse than your dad. The countless times you were beaten by him because you wouldn't strip. The endless pain you felt as he strapped you down on the bed, your lower half bleeding from the forced penetration. 

You were only seventeen when all that happened. One day, you were watching your dad die, the next, being raped by the man you thought loved you.

You didn't realize how bad you'd been shaking until now. You couldn't even keep your vape steady enough in your hands to keep it in your mouth. Why? Why did this have to happen to you? Why couldn't you just move on?

Bzzz bzzz

You looked down to your phone, which was on the seat beside you. A caller ID was on your screen. One you were all too familiar with. You didn't dare ignore it, immediately picking up the phone and answering.

"Hi love." You cringed at how good you were at hiding your emotions from him.

"Hi baby girl. Just really missing the sound of your voice. God I wish I could just pin you to the wall and shove my di-"

"Yeah-yeah. I know." You really didn't want to hear that right now. "I miss you too. Can't wait to come home."

"You better be here for Christmas break or I'll make your ass light up, you hear?"

You gripped your baggy sweatpants to keep yourself from letting it all out. You wanted out of this. You wanted to just say it was over and move on. But you couldn't leave. You couldn't bear to see him accept the same fate your father had. 

What is wrong with me?

"Yes sir. I will be at your house, ready to do as you wish."

"That's my girl. Now, can you video call? I need to see you naked so I can relieve myself of a little scratch~"

You gulped and looked at the time. "S-Sorry but the bell is going to ring in less than thirty seconds. Tonight for sure, okay? I'll do whatever you want me to."

He chuckled over the phone. "You better get ready then."

And he hung up.

That was it. You didn't want to do this. You couldn't. But you couldn't leave. God why?

"Why me?"

You looked to your phone, scrolling through your contacts. Maybe he could help. He had to be able to, right? He helped you before. I mean, he doesn't know everything but he knows enough.

You stopped on the contact "Professor de Kuiper" and tapped it. The options popped up. Call, message, video call. God did you really want to do this. He didn't even know about Derek or your father killing himself. He only knew the pain you endured growing up. The things you were forced to do. You couldn't keep this to yourself though. You only had one more quarter before break and you wanted nothing more than to stay here. You wanted to feel safe. You wanted to stay with Siebren...

"Hello? Is everything alright?"

You hadn't realized you pressed the call option.

"O-oh, um, yeah...Sorry..C-can we talk soon?" Your emotions were slipping. It was painfully obvious something was wrong.

"Of course. I'll see you in my office during your study time." He sounded relieved. Had he wanted you to talk to him?

"Thank you...I-I have to go...I'll s..see you then..." You then hung up, not giving him time to talk. You had to tell him everything...You needed to feel his arms around you again...You needed him.

_______________

"Then stay with me."

Those words played over and over again in your mind.

You had told him everything that had happened in your car. The thoughts that flowed through your mind, your father killing himself, the rape and abuse from your current boyfriend, the trapped feeling you felt, and the fear. God you emphasized your fear. You almost felt bad telling Siebren. He's probably never seen anyone so afraid in his life.

You did feel his embrace. It's where you were now, and where you had been when he offered to let you stay with him for the break. Yes, he really did say that.

"I know it is unprofessional of me, but I do fear for you. I fear if you leave, you may not come back in one piece."

You just nodded, face pressed against his chest. You could feel his chest rising and falling with each breath. You could hear each breath too. And his heartbeat. It had increased a bit since you had told him everything. Was it because he was fearful?

"I-I know...I really w...I want to..." You couldn't help the hiccups at this point. "I feel s-safe..."

"I know. Just breathe. Like we've been practicing."

You nodded and did your beast to steady your breathing. In your nose, out your mouth. You would think, after nearly five years of taking psychology classes, that you'd be better at calming yourself. Guess not.

"I'll make sure he doesn't get you. Okay?" He shifted to look down at you. "Don't answer next time he calls. If he threatens you, tell me. I'll take care of it."

You nodded, tightening your grip on Siebren. You felt him begin to rub your back in an attempt to comfort you. It worked to an extent, but nothing major. It was enough to allow control over your emotions again. You didn't know why he, of all people, was so helpful, nor did you know why he was so eager to help and comfort you, but you loved it. You loved feeling this safe. You'd never felt so safe.

"You mentioned saving for a dorm earlier today. Do you not have a place to stay on campus?" He suddenly asked.

You shook your head. "I live in my car. Jane lets me go to her dorm to shower and what not whenever I feel dirty but, that's the closest it gets for me. Being a waitress doesn't get me very far but no one else will hire me."

He let out a frustrated sigh before speaking. "I have a guest bedroom you could stay in until you save enough money. It's getting rather chilly and I don't wish to see you getting sick, especially if your car is the only place you can rest."

Why are you so nice to me?

"Oh, um, thank you professor...I appreciate it."

You didn't show it at all, but you were beyond excited. A warm house, a bed, food that wasn't three days old. It was a luxury on your part.

The bell then rang. 

You looked up at your professor, a small smile on your face. You were relieved. Someone cared about you. Someone genuinely cared about you. With a bit of effort, you got up, grabbing your things as your professor began to gather his own things. You walked to the door, opening it and stepping about halfway out before stopping. 

"Thank you so much Siebren. I hope I can repay you someday." You happily told him before finally leaving.

Had you stayed just a second more, you would have seen his face turn a little pink.

[yn-dreamlife]

Katsuki Bakugo x Reader || My Little Flower

pairing: Katsuki Bakugo x reader 

Warnings: mentions/memories of abuse, angst, guilty todoroki, guilty bakugo, Panic attacks, angst, fluff

Characters: Katsuki Bakugo, Izuku Midoriya, Ochaco Uraraka, Eijiro Kirishima, Shoto Todoroki, Mina Ashido, Tenya Iida.

Description: When one of Katsukis harmless insults Sends you flashing back into your abusive past you fear what he’ll think of you. Will your friendship possibly be ruined because of this? A.N: ok so I haven’t been able to watch a bunch of this show yet cause online schooling I’m going off of the fan fiction I’ve read so don’t come at me please. I love this fandom and honestly it would break my heart if I offended someone. I hope you enjoy. Also for the sake of things pretend that UA is a college 

I walk next to one of my best friends not noticing his heterochromiac gaze in me. I bite my lip deep in my thoughts i was still relatively new to the idea that I actually have to stay at UA college ever since it became a boarding school and to say I was nervous was a understatement, who would I be with? How would the rooms work? Would it be by class? What if I didn’t know anyone? What if-  “y/n,” shotos soft voice besides me brings me from my thoughts. I hummed in acknowledgement feeling my cheeks heat up worried he would be upset I was being like this. “relax.” He whispered softly placing a hand on my shoulder and letting out a warmth to help against the cool winter wether.  I felt some of the anxiety leave me.... some. Of course he wasn’t mad he knew how I got, anxious I was doing something wrong breaking an unspoken rule or not making everyone happy, worried constantly about grades, not caring for myself, all because of them. I smile apologetically at the duo colored hair boy. And he returns one back. 

But that doesn’t mean my anxiety’s of the dorm rooms would go away. We got to UA our bags in tow behind us as we walked up I saw a some of the people who have become some of my truest friends. Izuku Midoriya was standing next to Ochaco Uraraka, and I could see both there faces had a slight flush as there arm kept brushing against one another. I also saw Tenya Iida standing with them he was our class representative. I was still shocked I was in a class with such amazing people. As we came closer I also saw three other people approaching.  Mina Ashido smiled brightly at me rushing to give me a hug while leaving her bag to the two men she was walking with, I gladly welcomed the embrace needing it but never forgetting Shoto was right there because truth be told I would be crying already had it not been for his constant presences.  Due to her sprinting towards me it grabbed the attention of the group of three I had already noticed but my eyes where closed shut clutching to her. When we pulled away her two companions Eijiro Kirishima, and Katsuki Bakugo where also there now along with Midoriya, Uraraka, and Iida.  “Hi everybody!” I said happily willing the heat rising to my cheeks down. Whenever Bakugo was around my heart soared and butterfly’s formed in my stomach and if I dint keep my emotions down a flower crown would soon be forming on my head. Todoroki place a cooling hand on my back calming me but I think he did it to calm the heat glaring to my cheeks as all the eyes landed on me. 

“Hey there pretty lady!” Kiri said to me smiling pulling me into a hug and I gladly hugged my red haired fiend. He was always so happy which made it easier for me. 

“So does anyone know how this is all going to work?” I asked worried maybe I was the only clueless one. Most everyone looked confused except of course for Iida. “We will be placed by classroom into rooms all classes will have one common area but all of us have bedrooms, I am unsure at the time if any of us will be sharing.” I nodded my head “Of course no boys and girls will be sharing. Right?”

He gave a pointed look to me. “W-what’s that look for?!” I shrieked as I could do nothing to hide the blush. And when shotos hand left me due to him covering his mouth as he laughed it only seemed down my neck. “Oh come on we all know you and Todoroki are together!” Uraraka spoke smiling, Shoto stopped laughing.

“Not so funny know huh Shoto?!” He only glared at me But there was no heat behind it, and looked at our friends. “Me and y/n are not together.” He spoke seriously. All there faces turned to confusion and Midoriya spoke first. “Wait your not? But you two call each other by first name and you don’t do that to anyone else!” He said defensively. “Well yeah Shoto does it out of respect I don’t do it because none of you have given me permission to do so. Besides Shoto is like my brother, I could never do anything like that.” I smiled over at him and he returned it.

“Maybe stop making heart eyes at icy hot and maybe we’ll believe you, shitty woman.” Bakugo scoffed Kirishima hit his shoulder rather roughly at the look on my face. Usually his playful insults never bothered me and I’d fire back but that one.... he Used that one. Shoto without thinking shot out in front of me shielding me from everyone as I took a few steps back slowly. Third person P.O.V

Todoroki knew the moment the words left Bakugos mouth what would happen. He quickly moved in front of you and Shielded you from view. Kirishima never liked when his bakubro spoke to you that way knowing of his feelings towards you and yours towards him but he looked over and saw as you took a few steps back. Your eyes seemed to glass over and you had a far off look, one that reminded him of the pro hero’s who had seen to much in there time.

Everyone made a move to get closer to you but you quickly stepped back again, Shoto took another step forward practically growling, but you where to busy turning around to notice as you ran off. Todoroki let you knowing you needed space for a minute but he would give you no more time than that.

“What the fuck happened icyhot?!” Bakugo spoke daring anyone to mention the worry that leaked into his voice with a glare. No one mentioned it to worried, they had never seen you like that. You had an energy like Kirishima always happy and smiling always helping others. And your reaction to the name was not anticipated. So often you would fire something back at Bakugo that he was left feeling horribly guilty. Before anyone could ask Todoroki made his way to you.

Your P.O.V

Warning abuse flashback

I ran to the only place I had felt safe in all of UA it was a hidden garden long since forgotten at the back of the school. Once I had found it the first few days of school I instantly fell in love my quirk blossomed here. I could control all things natural from the elements to plants and animals. I could make animals listen and plants grow. But I also had the power to kill said plants easily. The trail of death I left behind in the grass as I ran a clear path to anyone but i was to far gone in my mind.

“You want to be a hero?!” His cold voice echoed in the basement the voice I still longed to hear praise come from. “Your quirk is nothing compared to mine. Do you hear me?! NOTHING! And besides....” he grabbed my throat roughly making me meet his eye, “your gonna be my slave for the rest of your stupid life.” His cold eyes once so filled with love broke the last part of my spirit I had left, I bowed my head in submission.

——

“Oh shitty woman!” His voice echoed through the house to my cage in the basement i whimpered. “Be ready cause I’m just pissed of tonight!” I shook out of both fear and coldness. I wasn’t allowed to wear anything except my shackles. He liked to keep me chained up my wrists attached to a chain that was liked to a metal collar around my neck. My feet also cuffed together. Both allowing me to move but never escape. I was his slave, his dog, his shitty woman, his punching bag, and his fuck hole. I had no other purpose anymore. I haven’t spoken to any of my loved ones in months? Years? Time blurred together, especially since I was locked away in the dark damp windowless basement. I heard his foot steps come thudding down the stairs, he held a knife in his hands, he liked to make me bleed.

I can’t tell how long it’s been, hours, days, minutes? All I knew was he wasn’t stopping and I knew one more cut, one more kick, I would be gone I couldn’t stop the happiness that flooded me I would be free.

I didn’t notice Shoto coming towards me till he placed his cool hand on one cheek and his warm one on the other the two temperatures grounding me slightly  

“y/n come back, you’re in your garden remember? I got you out of there, he’s gone he can’t hurt you.” His words shifted my thoughts to what happened next.

The hope I had just felt was suddenly ripped away as the doorbell rang. He growled and stormed upstairs stripping off the bloody shirt. I couldn’t hear anything but suddenly I heard his frustrated scream through the whole house the name he cried barley recognizable since the amount of time it has been since I heard it but a part of me knew.

“Todoroki!!” I laid there stunned... Todoroki? Thoughts of a pair of heterochromia eyes popped into my brain. The piecing blue and grey, but they held warmth. I could remember his hair two colors both white and red. I heard frantic footsteps rush down the stairs.

“y/n!” I heard a man yell I flinched but looking up I was met with those warm eyes except they had worry and fear i ached to take that away my mind still foggy on how I knew him. and it suddenly all came back, the times we spent laughing so hard tears streamed down our faces, sneaking into his home to see him when his father shut him away, sparing with him, creating flowers the same color as his eyes and hair.

“Sho...” I whispered the ghost of a smile in my eye the last thing I heard was his calming voice

“Don’t worry sweet flower I’ve got you”

“Sho?” I spoke the fog slowly leaving my brain I squeezed his hands to my face. “That’s it, there you go...welcome back.” I looked around and sighed but it was quickly turned into a hitch in my breathe as I saw the path of death I had created, quickly with a wave of my hand it was regrowing, Shoto smiles at me. “Sorry about that.” I muttered quietly he shook his head pulling me into a hug, “never apologize,” He pulled me away slightly staring at me directly in the eyes. “Never.” I nodded and he smiled at me grabbing my hand and helping me stand. It was getting dark so we headed back to what was now our class dorm.

When I entered I was quickly pulled into a hug I recognized it as Kirishima and hugged him back letting him hold me for a while as Shoto walked off going to his room. When I pulled away I looked behind him not seeing anyone else. “How is he?” I asked softly. “I should be asking about you.” He smiled softly “but of course you always worry about everyone else... he’s upset, to say the least but not at you more at himself.” I nodded and kiri showed me to my room turns out we didn’t have to share much to all of our reliefs. We loved each other sure but our own space was nice. It had been several hours and in that time I decided to clean my room, unpack everything, read something and scroll through social media all to distract myself from the inevitable nightmare I would have. But of course I drifted to sleep and of course I had a nightmare. I woke up hot a sweaty shaking away the flashes of the dream, I was back with my ex but this time he made bakugo watch as he did things to me and he begged and cried even though I knew the real bakugo had never shown such emotions to me but it seemed so real.

I walked out to the kitchen the mere thought of his eyes looking that way and my ex made me once again cry. I bit my hand the way I always did and before I knew it snow was falling above me.

“y/l/n?” I heard a voice behind me I turned around and saw none other than bakugo. The sight of his eyes made the sob I was holding back rip from my throat. They where the same eye from my dream the same look of pain and sadness in them.

“Katsuki-” I stopped myself despite my sobs. I felt a surge of dread wash through me. I knew I called him that in my head but to say it to him felt so rude without permission. I fell to my knees my hands taking position in front of my chest clasped together as I softly whispered

“I’m sorry I meant no offense bak-” I was cut off my soft hands cupping my face and sweat pants clad knees brushing against the skin of my own bare knees. “Don’t, katsuki is fine. I’m more concerned about what’s wrong?” I pursed my lips shaking my head. He sighed as he hoisted me up into his arms and began walking into the living room type area. He set my on the couch and then sat himself down next to me. “So tell me y/n, what’s wrong.” I took a deep breathe studying myself. He gave me all the time I needed and I was grateful. I sighed running my hand through my hair as I stood up. “what I’m telling you only Shoto knows I’m trusting you to keep this information to yourself.” He nodded sitting up and I felt like he had the same commitment to that Silent promise As he did to trying to be number one hero. “I was with an ex... and we where together towards our senior year of high school. You probably didn’t notice but well we went to the same high school you, and i know you knew that. But you probably didn’t notice my absence towards the end of the year. Well my boyfriend snapped or something and he... he made me his slave. Locked me in the basement, kept me chained, he would abuse me in every way possible. Sexually, physically, mentally, emotionally... and well Shoto... when he found me I was an inch from death and I was ready to welcome it with open and willing arms... that was a year ago.” His breathe hitched.

“Thanks to someone’s quirk a lot of the memories are gone... for the most part, I still have triggers and nightmares. One of those triggers being what he used to call me. I was his fuck hole, his slave, his... shitty woman.” I watched his hand fly to his mouth anger seeping into his eyes. “And today, I called you- oh my god I am so sorry!” He truly looked like he was about to pass out. “Is that why you where upset just now? Because of me? I can get my room transferred probably I’ll do whatever I ca-” I shook my head. “no not directly you, it was a nightmare I had but well uh.... you where in it.” I watched color leave his face I knew what he thought so I quickly stopped the thought from continuing by adding “my ex was doing those things in front of you! He was making you watch and I had to watch you... I had to watch your beautiful vermillion eyes be covered in pain and sadness and worry. And well you came into the kitchen and that’s the exact look i saw. And the reason it affected me is because I like you katsuki. A lot and honestly I’m sorry, because who wants some broken cry baby to be head over heels for them but I am and I understand if you don’t wish to speak to me again.” before I could comprehend what was happening I was being pulled into his arms. His scent of burnt sugar and caramel invading my senses. His hands moved through my hair and I hummed at the feeling.

“i feel the same way about you baby.” I sighed as I moved closer to him and he in turn pulled me into his lap. He rubbed his hands steadily up and down my back as he layer down on the couch. “I’m sorry all of that happened to you, I’m sorry I said that to you, and I’m sorry that I never went to check on you in high school. Truth is I did notice I just thought you moved or something.” We sat in scilence for a little while till I spoke up again.

“Katsuki...” he hummed “what am I to you?” He moved my head so I was looking at him. I saw his vibrant eyes and they warmed me throughout even my whole soul. “you... you’re my little flower, so delicate under harsh conditions but no matter how heavy the foot or how harsh the winter you’ll come back as vibrant or even more vibrant than before. You are my light, and my everything and if you will allow me the honor my girlfriend.”

Tears brimmed my eyes “Oh god, I’m sorry. Don’t cry! Shit! Um-” I cut him off smiling and he sighed and visibly relaxed.

“i would love nothing more than to be your girlfriend, firework man.” I gently leaned down my lips a hairs breath away from his and he leaned in closing the distance I sighed I had wanted this since I first layed eyes on him. It felt so nice.

“Goodnight katsuki.” I whispered as I kissed his jaw cuddling back into his warm bare chest on,y now realizing his attire but not caring enough to be embarrassed. “goodnight my little flower.” The last thing I heard before drifting into sleep was “ill protect you, always.”

[alexhogh7137]

The Battle Between Love and Fire-

Ivar the Boneless × Reader

Chapter Seventeen: Fear

Chapter Sixteen

Word Count 2.5k

Warnings: mentions of blood, heavy angst, some fluff

Hvitserk's Pov:

It is dark and very silent. I can hear a rat's squeaks and the pitter patter of their feet on the concrete floors. It is much darker than normal and the atmosphere is heavy and eerie. I stare at the door of my room, just staring. My heart is racing but nothing has happened for my heart to be racing so fast. 'What is wrong with me?' I asked myself. I continue to stare until I hear the front doors shut. 'Who just left?' I get out of bed and rush out of my room, searching for whoever just left. 

When I get to the main hall, the front doors are ajar. They are never ajar, especially at night. I rush to the double doors and open them. The snow is falling hard and heavy. It is almost impossible to see, but I try. When I walk further, I can see drag marks. In the snow, there is a huge blood pile in the snow, that stops right by the river banks: where ships import trading items. My heart sped up and I raced back into the house and ran to Y/n and Ivar's room. Ivar is in bed, asleep. But Y/n is nowhere to be found. 

"IVAR WAKE UP!" 

Ivar "What what?! What is it?!"

"WHERE IS Y/N!?" 

Ivar looks beside him, where you sleep on the bed, and notice that you are indeed gone. 

Ivar "W-she..she was just here.."

Hvitserk "THE DOORS WERE OPEN IVAR!! THERE IS BLOOD BY THE TRADING PORT!" 

Ivar "What?!"

Hvitserk "WHERE IS SHE?!" 

My heart feels like it is breaking in my chest. I can't get the thought of all of that blood in the snow, out of my head. What happened to her? Who took her, and why?

Ivar "I...why didn't I wake up?!"

Hvitserk "Does it matter?! She's gone!" 

And in that moment I woke up.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I rush to Y/n and Ivar's room and see her sleeping peacefully in bed and Ivar is beside her. I audibly sigh from relief and sit down on the floor because my legs give out from my panic attack. That was the worst vision I have ever witnessed. This cannot become a reality, I will not allow it. I will do whatever it takes to keep Y/n safe. I kept watch as they slept, in case something was about to happen, I would stop whoever was coming through those doors.

…

Y/n "Hvitserk...hey.." I feel her shaking my shoulder slightly to wake me up. 

"Huh?"

Y/n "How long have you been laying here?"

"Longer than you'd like.."

Y/n "What happened? Did you sleep in here?"

"I...I don't know exactly what time I came in here. But yes, I fell asleep on the floor. I am sorry, I didn't mean to startle you."

Y/n "Hvitserk, what is going on-"

Ivar "What is going on?"

"Go back to sleep, brother. I am sorry, I didn't mean to stay in here.."

Ivar "How long have you been in here?"

"I just told Y/n, I don't know exactly. It was a long night for me."

Y/n kneels back down and sits next to me, while Ivar sits up in bed. 

Y/n "What happened last night, Hvitserk?"

I let my head fall to the ground as I began to cry. I let my emotions out for the first time since I was a child. I told her that she was taken from Kattegat, and was possibly seriously injured. She looked up at Ivar who was immersed in my story. 

Ivar "Was it a vision or a nightmare, Hvitserk?"

"A vision. That is why I came in here to make sure that she wasn't actually gone. When I realized that she was okay, I just sunk to the floor and I must've passed out."

Y/n "Did you see who took me?"

"No. I heard the doors shut. When I got outside, you and the people that took you, were gone."

Ivar "I'll go tell the guard's to be on high alert. You, brother mine, go back to bed. You must be exhausted."

"Ah yes."

Y/n "I'm going to stay with Hvitserk until he falls asleep. I will be out when he does, stay safe please."

Ivar nods in agreement, "Always am, love you sweetheart."

Y/n "I love you."

…

When we got to the bedroom, I was visibly shaking. Sleeping on the cold floor, in the beginning of winter, was not a good call on my part. 

Y/n "Hvitserk, you are freezing!" 

"I-I know.." she got into bed, and offered her arms to me while I slowly climbed into bed. Once I was in bed, she pulled the fur covers on top of both of our bodies and she rested her body on top of mine. Her body warmth was all that I needed. My nerves were calmed, and my stress and anxiety declined rapidly. 

Y/n "Go back to sleep."

"I don't want to anymore. I am afraid that if I fall back asleep, I'll get the same vision."

Y/n "You won't," she looks up at me, "you didn't have me when you fell asleep last night. I am here now. Go back to sleep."

"I-I can't. I don't want to lose you, Y/n."

Y/n "You are not going to lose me. This kingdom is surrounded by vikings and trained warriors and shield maiden's. My dragon's do not sleep at night, they sleep during the day. We are all safe. It is just in your head. I am with your child, your fears are heightened...I am right here."

"I don't know what I would do if I did lose you."

Y/n "So stop thinking that way!" She grabs my hand and places it on her growing belly. "We are fine."

My eyes welt with tears. She is right. It is all just in my head. 

Y/n "If you don't stop crying, I am going to cry and that situation is going to be a bloody mess." I chuckle and wipe our tears off of our faces. 

"My apologies.."

Y/n "Go to sleep. I'll stay with you until you fall asleep." 

"Promise?"

Y/n gives me her pinky finger and we intertwine our fingers together, "I promise."

As she buries her face into my chest, and her hand rests on my chest, I can feel my eyelids getting heavier and heavier. I grab her hand and hold hers in my own and feel myself drift off into a nice slumber. 

When I feel her body shift on top of mine, I immediately wake back up. When my eyes open, I can see her slowly trying to get off of me, without trying to wake me. 

"Stay…"

Y/n "I didn't mean to wake you-"

"Stay….please…" her eyes form those of puppy-dog eyes. I pull her back into my arms and she relaxes into my arms once more. Today is going to be a struggle for me, mentally. But at least, right now...I have her in my arms and she is safe and my child is safe.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Your Pov:

Honestly, when Hvitserk told me that he had a vision of me being taken away from Kattegat..I believed him immediately. I always have had this fear of being taken from here because of my father's rage. He knows that I am much happier here and he must hate it. As soon as I found out that I was carrying a child, my fear of that happening escalated. If something does happen to me, not only does it affect me but it would also affect my unborn child. And when I saw Ivar's face, I knew that he believed it as well. 

When I woke up from the nap, I went straight to Ivar who was still instructing his army and guard's.

Ivar "We all need to be on high alert! This is your queen and future princess or prince's lives we are talking about here! If you see anything out of the ordinary, you come to me or Ubbe immediately! If you see ships coming in for trading, you come and tell me immediately. Do not think that this threat is not real! This threat is as real as it can be. We need to keep her and everyone safe, do you all understand me?!"

"Yes!" They all shouted.

Ivar "Now go to your positions!" 

When he turns around, he sees me standing there observing. He walks over to me and pulls me into a warm embrace.

Ivar "Are you alright, my sweet?"

"As good as I can be right now."

Ivar "How is he?"

"Asleep. But he is really shaken."

Ivar sighs, "I suppose he is. I can't imagine how he must be feeling, seeing that vision."

"I know. This baby-"

Ivar "Will be safe! Nothing is going to happen to any of us, do you hear me?"

"Yes. Are you okay?"

Ivar "Yes. Our people are aware that something might happen. Every precaution is being made."

"That is good." Ivar looks at me and leans down and kisses my lips gently and lovingly. I smile into the kiss, as does my husband. He pulls back and rests his head on mine. 

Ivar "Let's try to enjoy our day, yes?"

"Ah yes. My dragon's, let's go see them. They always cheer us up, yes?"

Ivar "There's my girl."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ivar's Pov:

Seeing Y/n with her dragon's, warms my heart. I have never seen someone so loving but yet so powerful at the same time. Especially a woman. Y/n has been an absolute blessing, given to me by the gods and the fear of that being taken away from me, tears my heart out of my chest. I watch as she feeds her beloved creatures with a smile on my face. But as soon as I think about my brother's vision, my face turns to sorrow. I can't get the thought of losing my love out of my head. She means too much to me. My late wife, Freydis, was nothing like Y/n. She betrayed me, she lied to me and acted like she loved me but did not. Y/n is kind, loving and generous. She has my heart and I know that I have hers. 

"They look playful today!"

Y/n "They need to fly."

"They can, but you aren't leaving Kattegat borders today."

Y/n "They need to fly, Ivar."

"And they can. But I am not letting you out of my sight until we know for certain that there is no threat."

Y/n sighs, "You aren't my father, Ivar! You can't hold me here all because of a vision!"

Ivar's hands turn into fists, "Fine, go! I HOPE THAT THE VISION DOES COME TRUE!"

I watch her eyes fill with tears as she got on top of her dragon's and left out of my sight.

Hvitserk comes running and screaming her name, "WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING!?"

"She wanted to go. I told her no and she got mad at me. If I didn't let her go, I do not know if I could have kept my hands to myself."

Hvitserk gets in my face, "If you ever hurt her, I'll make sure that you will regret it. Do you understand me, brother? You might be her husband, but she is the mother of my child, and I will not allow you to cause her any harm."

"I wouldn't actually hurt her, Hvitserk. Why do you think so poorly of me, huh?"

Hvitserk "Because YOU KILLED YOUR FIRST WIFE!" 

My heart sunk to my feet. He knew? He knew this whole time..I thought that he bought what I told him and Ubbe: she was murdered by an invader of Kattegat. 

"I would never-"

Hvitserk "Good. Because believe it or not, you are not the only one that loves Y/n. I love her, Ubbe and Torvi love her, our people love her. And you just let her go!"

"I-I shouldn't have..I was just so angry-"

Hvitserk "Start praying, Ivar. Pray harder than you have ever prayed before. Because that is all we can do now."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nightfall occurs…

When you return to Kattegat, you are completely exhausted. Your eyes are almost swollen shut from crying all day and your head is pounding. Your dragon's are starving and are also exhausted. When you dismount, you almost fall to your knees from being so weak. 

"My queen!" A women yelled.

"THE QUEEN HAS RETURNED!" A man yelled. You sighed because all you wanted to do was go to bed. 

"We feared that you may never return!" A women said, taking your hand.

"I will always return. I just needed time is all. Long day, yes?"

"Yes. Let's get you inside, you must be freezing!" She helped you inside and Ivar stands when he sees you. You are honestly hurt by the words that your husband said to you before you left, that you almost don't want to even touch him. 

Ivar "There you are! We were all worried sick!"

"Were you, were you really?" Ivar's face went into a scowl.

Ivar "Of course I was. I am sorry for what I said. I shouldn't have said that and I should not have let you go."

"But you did and look, I am back."

Ubbe comes up from behind him, "And thank gods you are!" He runs and picks you up in his arms. 

"Hey!" 

Torvi "Oh look at her, she is shivering."

"I am alright. I just need a warm bath and I'll be good as new." 

Maiden "I will warm it for it, my queen."

"Thank you ma'am." You look all over the place and no sign of Hvitserk, "Where is Hvitserk?"

Ubbe "He has been in his room ever since you left Kattegat."

"I'll go see him. I'll see you all in the morning."

Ivar "I will see you in bed, yes?"

"Yes, of course."

 …

When you open up the doors, you see Hvitserk huddled in his bed, curled up into a ball.

"Hvitserk?"

He looks over at you, face all puffy and swollen, "Y/n? Y/N!" He gets out of bed and ran to your side. When he hugs you, all of your anger and anxiety from today went away.

Hvitserk "I thought that something happened! I thought that the vision came true somehow-"

"It didn't. I just needed time away, I'm home now." 

Hvitserk "Don't scare me like that ever again."

You chuckle, "I won't, promise. But hey, I need to go take a bath, I am freezing. I am home, I am safe. No need to worry, okay?"

Hvitserk "Okay." He kisses your forehead and he watches you leave for the bathroom in yours and Ivar's chambers.

…

When everyone is asleep, no sound is made but the front double doors closing shut, and Hvitserk hears it. He runs to the front doors and just as he feared, they are ajar.

@hvitserkmarcosource @youbloodymadgenius @ivarsgoddess @a-mess-of-fandoms @jzr201 @ivarzeitgeist @kaitieskidmore1 @herestherealproblem @heavenly1927 @saldelys @10868letsgo @conaionaru

[penwieldingdreamer]

My best friend, naughty lover and partner for life

Next part in the series. Let me know what you think, as always have fun and happy reading.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5

Warnings: slight angst

Words: 3681

Part 6

“Mum?” you sniffed once your mother had answered the video call. It had been five weeks since Keanu’s revelation and he had already been gone again, the filming in New York continuing. He had been devastated, but took your decision not to join him at the Big Apple in stride. You couldn’t even return his sentiments without fearing it would end before it even began.

“What’s wrong, honey?” she asked, concern coloring her words. “Did something happen to the baby?”

Shaking your head, you leaned back in the chair, seeing your mother watch you closely. “N-No.”  

"Alright, that’s good, Sweetie," your mother sighed relieved. “Can you tell me what’s going on?”

“H-He wanted me to - ugh.” You rubbed at the tears that were making their way down your cheeks again. Fucking hormones. “He wanted me to c-come to New-w Y-York with him.” Your mother strained to hear you over the hiccups that escaped you while talking to her. 

You could see your mother take a deep breath, probably trying to calm herself down. "Who wanted you to go with them? Tommy?" 

A groan left your lips, annoyed that she wasn't listening to the things you had told her before. "No! Keanu!" you nearly screamed, frustrated with your mother and with yourself for acting that way. "He was so afraid, mum." 

"Honey, please calm down." She spoke so softly, like the day you called her about the baby. "Tell me again what's been going on with the two of you." 

"Is dad listening?" 

You heard him chuckle in the background, of course he had been tuning into the conversation. "You know how he is, now say what's on your mind." 

"You remember when I told you about that guy, my boss?" you asked, feeling your breathing turn back to normal again. "Well, he's kinda acting like he's the actual father of my baby." 

"Say what?" came your father's astonished reply and you knew your mum must have been shocked as well. "But he isn't, right?" 

"No, daddy. He's not, but Tommy is." 

You could hear some squabble on the other end and finally the face of your father came into view once you had accepted and could see your mother behind him glaring at her husband. "Right now, that's better Pumpkin." he smiled. "Now let me get this straight. This Keanu fella isn't the baby daddy but really wished he was." 

"I guess so yeah, we haven't talked in like five weeks, because he's filming and hasn't been back in LA since then."

"Huh." your father made a comic sound, rubbing his chin the same way the actor often did. "Would it be so bad?" 

Your eyes widened and you sent a quick look to your mother not sure what to say. "I, well I don't know, I guess not. But still." you finally answered, shrugging your shoulders. "What's gotten into you, dad? When I introduced Tommy you've been acting like" 

"I already knew he was an asshole." He interrupted you, pointing his finger at you as if he was sitting right there across from you. "Tommy's always been the kind of guy to be careful about, but from what your mum tells me this new guy must be something special, even if he's an actor."

Rolling your eyes, you leaned your elbow on the table top, supporting your head with your hand. Of course your father would talk like that. It wasn't as if he didn't know Keanu Reeves, but if you had to bet, he'd probably not want to think about his daughter dating someone only a few years younger than him. 

"Now Pumpkin, let me in on this, too. What's been going on with him and you?" 

You were astonished that your mother hadn't already told him the whole story, so you repeated it again, how you had met, that we was your boss and did everything for you and the baby. "And then he said he loved me, that he wants me to come with him to New York." With bated breath you waited for your parents to react, scream, cry, whatever just to do something. 

"And how do you feel about it?" your mother questioned, giving you that look she always did when you already had an answer. "Do you love him, too?" 

The mood swings were coming in now, making you agitated or tearing up in a matter of seconds. "I don't know." you sighed, tears gathering in your eyes again as you leaned back in the chair, angling your phone so your parents could still see you. "There's so many things to consider. Keanu is a celebrity, he's always in the spotlight even if he doesn't try to be. And I'm pregnant with another guy's baby, working at the motorcycle shop he's the co-founder of and" 

"Take a breath sweetie, it's a simple yes or no question." your father interrupted your rant. "Do you love him?" 

"Why are you so chill about that?" you sniffled looking at your father, absolutely expecting him to rant about your possible relationship with Keanu. 

"You're old enough to make your own decisions. You didn't ask me when you got pregnant, so now answer the damn question."

Putting your hand over your bump protectively, you glared at your father. "Don't curse in front of her, she can hear you." you nearly shouted to make point, but calmed down when you thought about your feelings for Keanu. There was definitely something there but you'd have to explore it, take it easy before you said anything else to hurt him. 

"Sweetie, please, yes or no?" your mother asked, hoping to bring your wayward thoughts around. 

Rubbing a hand over your belly, you felt your daughter kick, telling you to suck it up. "I guess so, yeah. But" 

"No but, Pumpkin, you get up of your ass and tell him how you feel."

"Peter." your mother admonished him, lightly hitting his shoulder. "Just take your time, honey, but you should really talk to Keanu before it's too late."

***

"It's been eight weeks, don't you think you should talk to her?" 

Keanu was back for the weekend visiting his mum and his sisters. Kim had agreed to come over to his place and talk, they knew his mother would be okay with his decision as long as he was happy, but he needed his younger sisters opinion on the matter. "She walked away the first time." 

"Ke, don't forget she's pregnant and hormonal." she said, watching her brother, a cigarette in one hand and a glass of wine in the other. "She's prone to react that way, Y/N was shocked. After what you told me about her ex, I guess she is careful with her feelings." He puffed out the smoke and turned to the wonderful view in front of him. He kind of missed it while being in New York, and the warmth during the winter. "You kinda put her on the spot you know. The whole thing with Jenny and Ava has made you panic even more now and I think you just want to throw it out in the open before it's too late, try to do it the right way now with Y/N and the baby and hope everything goes smoothly." The actor grunted when he mulled over Kim's words. She was right to an extent, he was afraid of losing you or the baby, that's why he wanted you to know how he felt, no matter the costs. 

Maybe he should try to talk it over with you, get to terms with your feelings. 

Keanu sighed, knowing no matter what you decided, he'd still be there for you. You and the baby. 

God the baby, it would be born soon. If he still got it right there would only be five more weeks to go. Before his confession you had updated him every day, now there wasn't even a sign you were still in the same country, only Gard had told him how you were doing right now. 

"I just - I want them safe. I couldn't help Ava and I couldn't even save Jenny." he finally agreed, tears gathering in his eyes. "It's been years a-and sometimes I still question myself if there was something, anything I could have done differently, if I didn't make those movies and the music they would still be here." 

Kim knew he was still hurting, never really gotten over the death of his girlfriend and unborn daughter. She gathered him in her arms like the small boy he felt at the moment despite his age, rubbing her hands along his shoulder and back. "There was nothing you could have done, Ke, sometimes it's just - it's fate." 

"Fate's a cruel mistress." he mumbled, throwing the burnt out cigarette into the ashtray next to him, the wine glass still in his hand. 

Nodding her head, Kim laid a kiss on his dark hair so much her own. They had always been so close, he was there for her when she had been diagnosed with Leukemia, spend every day sitting next to her hospital bed and holding her hand, but she couldn't understand how he would act that way with a woman he barely knew, and still it shouldn't surprise her. Keanu barely knew Jenny and he told everyone she was the love of his life. There was a time when he had that exact look on his face, talking about Jennifer and the baby, that happy and smiling face. Now he had it again, but this time the woman wasn't even his. 

This time it was a woman, pregnant with another man's baby and her brother was totally in love with her. Kim just hoped Y/N would be able to wrap her head around it before he drew away from all of them, shutting himself off and only doing his movies. Their mother stood in the doorway to the balcony, listening to each word they had spoken. Patricia knew that he must have taken the young woman by surprise. She herself had been surprised when he talked about Y/N, a woman younger than him by twenty five years, the way he had talked about Jenny at that time, but she instantly knew that there would be more than just friendship in the future. His mother had yet to meet her, to really know who he was so infatuated with to be able to judge the situation. With that thought in mind she went back to Karina, who was standing in the kitchen trying to sort out what they would need for dinner that night. 

"What are they talking about?" her youngest daughter questioned, watching both siblings outside on the balcony of Keanus home. 

"Y/N, his life in general and how he secretly longs to be the father of her child." their mother said, sitting down at the kitchen isle. 

Nodding her head, the producer breathed out a sigh. "Okay, well I secretly long for something, too." she said, earning a raised eyebrow from the older woman. "My big brother doesn't have anything to eat in this house, meaning I need to go shopping for dinner." 

"Well then, let's get shopping, I have a quick errand to run, too." Patricia got off the chair while Karina let her two siblings know that they would go get some groceries. 

When she came back, the younger woman linked arms with her. "So, what's this errand you need to run?" 

***

"Are you sure you should be working?" 

Looking up, you saw Gard standing in the office doorway, arms crossed over his chest and eyebrows raised. Sighing you turned back to the bills you had prepared for Laura so she only needed to send them off. "I'm not doing much, Gard, besides it's better than sitting at home."

He sighed, walking over to Laura's empty desk and taking her chair. Pulling it over to your side, the co-founder of ARCH sat down and watched you intensely. "When are you going to talk to him. You've both been walking around like zombies, you here and he up there in New York." he mutters throwing his hands up. "Did you know Keanu's been asking about you and the baby all the time because you don't update him anymore?" 

The question caught you of guard. You would have guessed with your display those weeks ago he would have been angry and you had to do all the groveling." I-I didn't know." you admitted, looking at your boss with wide eyes.

"He's done nothing but call or text so he had an update on your condition." Gard said, putting his hand on your arm. "That guy's crazy for you, Y/N." 

Groaning, you felt your daughter kick, obviously agreeing with him. Now nearly at the end of your pregnancy you already felt the so called Braxton Hicks, the pain in your lower belly as your body started to get ready for birth. Your midwife told you it was completely normal and that your baby would kick more than before because she didn't have as much space as when she had been smaller. 

"You okay?" he asked, putting his hand on your arm comfortingly. 

You nodded your head with a slight grimace when you felt a twinge in your back. "Yeah, just the baby playing soccer with my kidney and these mock contractions." 

"And you're sure those are just Braxton Hicks?" 

Rolling your eyes, you got up from the chair, well tried to get up, with a lot of difficulty before Gard helped you. "I'm sure, my midwife told me the signs, so I know that I still got a few weeks before this one" you pointed down at your large belly. "Is going to make an appearance." 

Putting his hands up in mock surrender, your boss grinned at you. "I was just making sure, not that I need to take you to the hospital now." 

Shaking your head, you walked out of the office and towards the main entrance, preparing everything for the client that would come in to get his bike tomorrow. When you came to the reception desk you stopped abruptly, causing Gard to nearly topple you as he walked into your back. He looked up to see what was going on when a smile crossed his features while your face was frozen in shock and the only thing flashing through your mind was 'Shit'.

"Patricia, Karina." your boss greeted the two women, signaling to Kelly at the desk to bring some coffee for them. "How have you been? Is Keanu home yet?" 

The older woman sent you a quick glance before a soft smile graced her lips. "He is. We're there for dinner at his house which reminds me." She patted his arm and made her way over to you. 

You felt your hands grow cold from anxiety and your spine tingle, like you needed to be ready to jump at any opportunity. It wasn't that Patricia Reeves was looking at you like she would murder you, right here in the entrance hall of ARCH, but still you felt nervous, after all you probably broke her only son's heart.

"Do you mind if we go somewhere a bit more - private, I don't want everyone to hear what we talk about." She laid her hand on your back and steered you to the offices, obviously having been there a lot of times. "I'm Patricia, by the way, Keanu's mother."

Swallowing the lump in your throat, you nodded wide eyed at her, not sure if you would be able to utter one sound. You were thankful when you finally reached the office again, sitting down at your desk and getting off of your swollen ankles. As happy as you were with your baby and the pregnancy, you would be even happier to get it over with. 

"I think you know what I want to talk about." 

"Y-Yes." you stuttered, wringing your hands together. "A-And I'm sorry how it must look like, that you mu-ust think I'm ungrateful." 

A quick laugh escaped her and his mother shook her head. "Believe me when I say I know my son better than anyone." 

"I know you do, every parent knows their child better than a stranger would."

Patricia eyes you rubbing your belly, knowing you were nervous around her. "Do you? Because then you wouldn't know that my son loves you." 

Biting your lip, you avoided her gaze, knowing you'd probably end up crying like a baby, like you did all those weeks ago. "H-He told me." 

"That he did, but you didn't answer, Y/N." she said so calmly you were afraid to utter any unnecessary words. "You haven't contacted him, why? I thought you were good friends despite everything." 

Cocking your head you bit back the groan as another wave of pain flashed through you. Why did it have to be now, when you were already mentally preparing your funeral once Patricia was done with you. "I didn't think he would -ah- want to talk to me."

His mother watched you carefully, leaning closer and putting her hand on your jean clad knee. "That's the dumbest shit I've ever heard. You love him, too, don't you?" 

"Please, don't curse, she can hear you." you mumbled and pointed at your bulging stomach, hoping that your baby wouldn't be born and her first word was 'shit'. "And yeah, I-I think so." 

With a chuckle and a shake of her head the older woman patted your knee. "Gosh, you young ones are so dumb sometimes. My son is so utterly in love with you, you can't even imagine. He's been so desperate to know about you and the baby that he called Gard every day. The one time I visited him in New York we walked by this shop that sold baby clothes and he stopped. Keanu stared at that little dress in that window, even before Ava died he never behaved like that. He was in love with his baby, but he didn't have that look."

You shifted, trying to find some relief from the constant sting in your lower half. "What look?" 

"The look of a proud father to be, so utterly in love again that he’d do anything for them." 

You shifted again and Patricia shot you a questioning look. "Are you alright, dear? I didn't mean to frighten you or make you uncomfortable." 

"N-No, it's not that." you admitted, putting your hands around your belly. "I've just been having these Braxton Hicks all day, but my midwife said it's normal." 

"Oh, that's not Braxton Hicks, darling." she said and you felt your eyes widen in surprise. "Those are contractions, I've had three kids, I know it when I see it." 

Another sharp pain went through you, fiercer and longer than the ones before, eliciting a pained moan from you. Leaning forward as good as you could to lessen the ache in your back, you felt a cramp, like the ones you usually get when you're on your period. Patricia got up, coming over to stand next to you.

"Do you feel like you need to bear down, like when you use the toilet?" she asked, calmly rubbing along your shoulders. 

Taking a deep breath you looked at Keanu's mother. "At the moment I feel like I really need to pee." you moaned, closing your eyes. 

"I think you'll be welcoming that baby today, honey." 

Shaking your head, you grabbed her hand. "It's too soon, I still got six weeks." you cried, but instantly felt a wet sensation between your legs. Patricia and you looked down, shocked at what was happening. 

"I think I just peed my pants." 

***

Kim and Keanu were pulled out of the comfortable silence when the doorbell rang. He turned to his sister with a raised eyebrow. "I thought mum and Kar have a key." 

"They do." his younger sister shrugged, not sure what to answer. 

Again the shrill tone sounded and the actor got up to investigate. If they couldn't wait that long it must be someone really desperate. When he reached the door he pulled it open, coming face to face with a hard breathing Gard. "Hey man, dinner's not until eight tonight, don't you have some bikes to take care of."

"Keanu, we gotta get to the hospital." 

All color drained from his face, not sure how to respond. "W-What happened? Who's"

"It's Y/N." his friend said, clapping him on his shoulder. "She's gone into labor, your mum and Karina are with her, but she's asking for you." 

Kim had come over, to see what the commotion was about. She, too, greeted the friend and co-owner, but when she saw the pale face of her brother turn to her, the former actress instantly knew something was wrong. "What's going on?"

"I need to take him to the hospital, Y/N has gone into labor and she's been asking for him." the mechanic explained and Kim rolled her eyes. 

She hit her brother's shoulder to get him out of his stupor. "What are you waiting for, she's asking for you and at the hospital. Get your ass into gear." she admonished, grabbing their light coats and pushed the actor out of his house.

He looked at her, fear mirroring in his brown pools. "What if" 

Kim interrupted him, holding her hand out as a sign for 'stop'. "Don't even finish that sentence. Y/N is going to be fine and so will be the baby, no matter if it's too soon. The baby is going to live." 

Keanu sat on the passenger's seat of Gard's truck, watching the scenery of Los Angeles rush by as they made their way to the hospital. Inside he was praying to every God he knew that both would survive it, that Y/N would be strong enough to handle the birth and that the baby would be living. He knew if something went wrong he wouldn't be able to live on, not for the second time.

Part 7

Taglist

@meetmeinthematinee @ladyreapermc @axshadows @a-really-bi-girl @fanficsrusz @ficsnroses @toomanystoriessolittletime @fortheloveoffanfic @pinkzsugar @lunaeminxxx​ @momorix3​ @sallyp-53​ @keanureeefs​ @baphometwolf666 ​ @mrspeacem1nusone​ @random806​ @fuck-yeah-hope @wholelottatiffy @cap-just-said-language @theolsdalova @omg-imagine @rabbitpajamas

[arolla-pine]

I, Marinette - p.6

(6) – Paris at night

“I’ve always wanted to come to Paris…” I sighed when I entered Marinette’s balcony in the evening. “I can’t believe that when I’ve finally come here, I’m doing all I can to go back home… Irony, don’t you think?” I asked Tikki that approached to me and sat down on my shoulder.

Dusk descended surrounding me with a warmth of the evening. In the Miraculous universe the weather was always nice – except one meaningful rainy afternoon and some Stormy Weather’s follies. I stared at the street below seeing so many people rushing somewhere. Just another day… I looked up at the illuminated Notre Dame cathedral. It was surrounded by scaffolds and little by little it recovered its previous shape. I couldn’t believe I hadn’t taken the opportunity to see it inside, when I had a chance…

“You haven’t been here yet? Really?” kwami asked.

“Only once. It was a business trip. Very short. Two years ago, in January… I was very sick then…”

“It’s a pity…”

“Oh, and it was like a winter storm then…” I remembered. “You know, just in case I wanted to see anything… But I managed to capture w beautiful picture of the Eiffel Tower. Snow only highlighted its patterns…”

I got lost in my thoughts. I remembered my evening walk – just like those people right now – alongside the Seine just to see the Notre Dame cathedral two years ago. I’d been so sick that I didn’t visit it inside deciding to do it next time. By the way I was looking for Marinette’s house somewhere around. Now I was sitting on the rooftop of this house and I could watch the cathedral all I wanted. I expected to see the Eiffel Tower eventually, because somehow most of Ladybug and Cat Noir’s fights ended there…

“Do you think Marinette is doing well?” I asked.

“As Lena?” Tikki made sure.

I nodded. Suddenly the emotion overwhelmed me when I realised I wouldn’t read my daughter a bedtime story. I wouldn’t hug her tonight… I just thought if I ever… Er, wait a minute! I called myself to order.

“This balcony is depressing!” I discovered.

“What?!” kwami burst out laughing.

“I’ve always wondered why Marinette has so many depressing thoughts, and now I began wondering if I ever come back home…”

“You miss your family, don’t you?”

“I can’t even find right words to tell you how much. And believe me, I know how to deal with words…”

“I think Marinette misses her parents too.”

“I’m sure she misses you too.”

“Thank you…” kwami whispered. “You’re so kind…”

“You’re welcome…”

We both went silent for a moment – each in her own thoughts. I was wondering if Marinette would read my daughter a bedtime story, if she’d overcome the panic in a new reality she’d found in the morning. Or maybe she’d spent the whole day in the bathroom?

“I know what you need…” Tikki said.

“Chocolate?” I guessed.

“It could work. Maybe later we’ll try with it. Now I wanted to suggest you a short tour around the city. You could get familiar with Ladybug costume and yo-yo…”

“Brilliant idea!” I agreed happy. I needed to change the place otherwise I could become overwhelmed with nostalgy. “Er… but…”

“You’re scared?”

“I’d be stupid if I wasn’t…” I admitted. “But I was thinking rather about the costume…”

“What’s with it?”

“Isn’t the costume look related to the miraculous holder?” I asked.

“How do you know that?” Tikki was surprised. “Let me guess… You’ve seen it in of the episodes?” she added irritated.

“Y-yeah…” I nodded. There was no need to argue. “I’m afraid that Ladybug’s costume will change if I, instead of real Marinette, transform.”

Kwami looked at me concerned.

“That might be a problem. If anyone notices the difference and combines it somehow with Marinette’s weird acting today, Ladybug’s identity may be revealed.”

“That’s why I asked. Is it possible that if I focus on Marinette’s version of the costume, I’ll get an identical one?”

“It is possible. You’ll never know if you don’t try…”

“OK then. Let’s check… Maybe it’ll better to come back to the bedroom and see the results in the mirror…”

I jumped inside and Tikki followed me. I stood in front of the mirror feeling both amused and excited. That was a moment to feel the Miraculous magic on myself.

“So… See you later…” I whispered to my kwami that winked at me in response. “Tikki, spots on!” I said the spell.

I felt warmth in my ears when Tikki disappeared in the earrings. Then that heat spread over my whole body like someone poured warm water over me. Soon after I saw Ladybug in the mirror, thankfully without any differences in her costume. That would help me in misleading everyone.

“So, we won’t talk anymore, Tik…” I muttered to myself. “You’re on your own, Lena!”

I watched my yo-yo. I remembered from “Oblivio” that I should have some instructions and guidance in my phone. I followed that hint. I read about my weapon, ‘Lucky charm’ and ‘Miraculous Ladybug’ spells. I realised that it would be quite dangerous for myself, my family and whole Paris when I’d get a lucky charm and had no idea how to use it. I kept all my hopes in my creativity which – all-in-all – wasn’t so bad so far…

“Yeah…” I sighed when I stood on the balcony again. “There’s nothing like having fear of heights and use flying as your mean of transport… Fine… Come on, Lena! Do or die…”

I ejected my yo-yo in the direction of the nearest street lantern. Either I’ll get there or I’ll die… The yo-yo twisted around the lamp-post and I felt a tug. I was terrified yet I jumped… And I flew out away. My stomach was somewhere in my throat when I realised how far from the ground I was flying. I passed the lantern where my yo-yo was wrapped. OK, now I was going to die…

To my surprise my wrist did something without my will. It twitched and the yo-yo released from the lamp-post. Still in the air I ejected it again and it twisted around a cornice of the Notre Dame cathedral. Great! Now I was going to ruin what they’d managed to rebuild.

My body acted again without my will – I passed the church instead of smashing myself on its façade. Maybe my theory of body memory wasn’t such a nonsense I thought? That heartened me and I my muscles relieved. I began feeling Ladybug in myself. Or maybe it was Tikki who took the lead?

I stopped on a tree branch at the bank of the Seine. The view was incredible. Actually, I could go everywhere I wanted. I recalled my previous walk there two years ago. I was curious how long it would take to get Louvre if I chose the air track. I remembered last time the way seemed endless because of my sickness and cold. All I wanted was a cup of hot tea with honey and lemon. But today it was warm and nice. And I could take a journey above the Parisian rooftops.

A minute or two later I landed on the roof of the Louvre Palace. I admired the glass Pyramid in the courtyard, the Arc de Triomphe du Carrousel in line with the Arc de Triomphe de l'Étoile. Aside there was the Tuileries Garden that I remembered as covered with snow, now beautifully blossomed. Behind the garden I could see the Place de la Concorde, that I had mentioned in one of my stories – the one I wrote here, by the way. In the distance I saw the illuminated Eiffel Tower revolving the beams like a huge lighthouse.

I was speechless.

Those views were breath-taking. I knew I’d never be able to see it again, because nobody would let me on the Louvre rooftop. I did my best to remember every detail and I hoped that ‘Miraculous Ladybug’ spell wouldn’t take this memory away from me.

I sighed.

And I was about to stand up and to continue running when suddenly I heard a muffled flop behind me. My heart skipped a beat and I turned around quickly.

I saw a pair of sparkling green eyes.

“It looks like you’ve changed a spot, M’Lady…”

---

I, Marinette - p.5  <-  Previous part  |  Next part ->  I, Marinette - p.7

Read the story from the beginning

[raven-black102]

The Jedi With A Vampires

I just though of this when I saw The Rise Of Skywalker. Hope you guys like it!

(Y/n)'s POV

"You know your always welcome back home." Aro said causing me to smile slightly at his words. "I know but then I'd risk putting you all endanger." I said softly causing soneone to chuckle. "You believe they can harm us? We can be just as strong." Caius said with determination.

"You'd be safer here then over there little sister." Marcus added softly as I sat on my couch. "I know that. But I don't think I could live with myself knowing I put you and the guards endanger. Your the only family I have left." I said sadly hanging up as I look down at my own and my masters sabers.

"I'll make you proud. Master Solo." I mumbled softly. I got up and place both of the sabors in my backpack. '(Y/n).' I heard causing me to look up and see my master standing there or a ghost of him. "Master Ben." I said as he stood infront of me. I can feel tears running down my cheeks as I look at him.

'Please. Be careful.' He said as he gently press his hands on my cheek. I closed my eyes imaging his warmth and soft touch on my skin. I opened my eyes only to see he was gone. "I miss you." I said softly before getting ready for school.

Time Skip

A small sigh escaped my lips as I parked my car at the school. I was late yet again but that didn't seem to bother any teachers since I still finish there work on time. I got out of the car and locked the door as I made my way towards the school. '(Y/n)!' I heard causing me to stop in my tracks. '(Y/n)!' I heard again causing me to turn around only to see nothing.

I waited for a few minutes only to hear silents. I turned back to the school and went to my locker to put my bag inside then got to class. "Ms. (Y/n). Your late again." Mr. Winters said causing me to shrug my shoulders as I sat next to Bella. "Anyways..." The teachee begans as I slightly clinch my fist.

"You okay (Y/n)?" Bella asked causing me to nod my head slightly. "Yeah. Just have a bad feelimg about today." I mumbled hoping time would speed up. To my luck it was already gonna be lunch time. I sat in the corner table next to the Cullen's and Bella. I could sense there was something off about them but I didn't question it nor did I want to.

"Hey (Y/n)!" Mike called causing me to clinch my fist again. "Mike." I said looking up at him. "I was wondering... I-If you w-would like to... You know... Go out with me." Mike said softly causing me to frown. "I'm sorry Mike I don't think that's a good idea." I said causing him to look down sadly. 'I don't want you to die because of me.' I thought then tensed up as I felt someone trying to get to my head.

I quickly pushed them out as I looked around to see one of the Cullens holding their head in pain. 'Got you.' I though then look back at Mike. "You'll forget you asked me out." I mumbled lowly as I move my palm to face him. "I'll forget I asked you out." He repeated. "You'll go back to your table and continue to eat your food tell lunch is over." I order as I felt someone was watching me.

"I'll go back to my table and continue to eat." He said then left me alone. '(Y/n). Your not being careful.' I heard causing me to get up and leave. "I don't need to put more people in endanger. I've already lost you." I said as I reach my locker and my bottom lips quiver slightly. 'I'm always with you.' Ben said as I grab my bag.

"(Y/n)!" I heard causing me to turn around to see Jasper walking towards me. "Jasper? Is something wrong?" I asked not looking at him in the eyes. "I was gonna ask you the same." He said as he grab my arms gently. "Don't." I warned tensing up. "Please. Just leave me alone." I mumbled softly as I look at him.

Jasper tensed up slightly giving me to change to leave the school. 'Hurry.' Ben said as I got to my car and drove off. I looked at my rear view mirror to see Ben holding Jasper down with the Force. Once I was far enough Ben appeared in the passager seat.

'His not human. His a cold one vampire.' Ben said causing me to tense up. "Is that what that feeling is?" I asked not once looking at him. "The force is warning me." I said as I drove my way back home.

Time Skip

'Run love!' Ben yelled as I passed through trees and jump over the fallen ones. Three bounty hunter were following behind and slowly catch up. 'You need to fight them.' Ben said causing me to raised both my hands as I stop and faced toward the hunters. "Jasper is coming." I mumbled sensing his distress emotions from here.

"The last Jedi." One of the hunters said as they stop running. "What do you want?!" I yelled as I moved both of my hand behind me. "You are worth a lot." Another said as I saw a glint of metal shine against the sun. "To bad you won't get any of it." I said as I turned on both of the lightsabers.

"Cause you be dead." I added as one of them aimed at me. Without hesitation I dodge the blaster and through Ben's saber at them only gor them to think I missed. I jump and spun around at one of the hunter cuting him in half. I raised up my right hand, using the force, to pick up the second just as Ben's saber came back cutting the hunter in half.

I grasped Ben's saber and clip it to my hip while I aim mine at the last hunter. I could sense Jasper and his sibling precents as I glared at the hunter. He aimed his blaster causing me to move my hand to the side causing the blaster to fly. I narrowed my eyes as the hunter was on his knees.

"Give me one excuse to not kill you?" I growled darkly as Ben stood next to me placing his hand on my shoulder. "They wanted you died." The hunter said as I slightly relaxed. "The Guild?" I asked causing the hunter to relaxe as he nods his head. "Why can't they just leave me alone." I mumbled softly as I turned off my saber.

"Because your the one that change the Supreme Leader Kylo Ren. You pulled him out of the dark side and loved him." He said causing me to tense up. "Kylo was never in the dark side. He was pushed. He was lost. Nobody was there for him when he cried for help. Nobody listen when he was silent. I was. And I would do it again." I said as Ben stood in front of me.

I pulled out my saber and grazed the hunter arm causing him to scream in pain. "Tell the Guild if they sent anymore hunter. I'll find all of them and kill them myself." I said as the hunter nod and runs off. "(Y/n)?" I heard causing me to turn and see Jasper looking at me in shock and slight betyal.

"I'm sorry." I mumbled then felt darkness consumes me. "(Y/n)!" '(Y/n)!' Two voices yelled as I fell unconscious.