#-really talk about it. i didnt realize how hard it would be when i finally did
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
planning courses for the next semester is not for the weak
#WHY IS EVERY SINGLE CLASS GOING ON AT THE SAME TIME.#WHY DO WE ALL START AT 9AM AND NOT GO PAST 11AM. PLEASE#please just strart at 1pmplease plase palseasee#i dont wanna take only 3 classes next semester but like erm.#mostly because im a little picky abt my professors. less so for electives but classes im worried about (SPEECH)#ive been pushing speech off for the longest time because i have crippling social anxiety 99% of the time. so i made sure i got a good prof#uhgghg#theres this one prof who does a lot of erm i think sociology classes yeah#she is so chill and nice and uses my prefurred name and pronouns (i really need to get my name chaged in the system uhghgh) but she did uh#the reverse grading and i hated it. everyone did. she was so nice and understanding..#one time i went 2 talk to her about my missing work (chronic pain and fatigue had me bed bound for days on end) and she literally just said#erm u have an A so u dont have to do it.#>@>>@>/1/1/?!?!?#live saver. i had a breakdwon in her office i was literally sobbing telling her about my health issues. it was really hard because i never-#-really talk about it. i didnt realize how hard it would be when i finally did#anywasy what was i saying. yeah i love her so much but not her grading and teaching system. but idk maybe ill try it again she has a gender#-and sexuality class i kinda wanna take because im a professional faggot
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
can i come over?
when schlatt moves to texas an unexpected storm leaves him with no where to go, will you offer up a room to your friend?
streamer reader x streamer schlatt
you had lived in texas since you attended college at texas a and m
orginally you went to ithica college, but you transfered during your sophmore year
you now had your own apartment as you were out of college
you knew a couple of other content creators who lived in the area, but not many
your closest friend, ted nivison, lived in los angeles, but you went to visit him every now and again
your phone rang, "gangnum style" blasting in your ears and groaned, you reached for your phone, only to be met with a picture of you and theodore from college freshman year
"i need your help guppie." teds face filled the screen and his dopey smile made you laugh
"you woke me up mr grouper." your nicknames came from the first time you got high together and decided to watch bubble guppies
"wakey wakey! does this fit look ok?" he set the camera down and walked away from the camera, he did a little spin before grabbing his phone again
"yes you look very fashionable theo. can i go back to sleep now?" ne nodded but very quickly realized he had something else to tell you
"wait really quick, remember schlatt? you met him during the lunch club era" you scanned your sleepy memory trying to remember this guy you probably met once.
"um, tall right? good looking?" ted nodded and laughed, sitting down at his desk
"glad to hear thats what you remember. anyways, im pretty sure hes moving out to Austin in the coming months, so you guys should talk cause he only knows a handfull of people out there." ted said
"cool. can i please sleep now." your tired brain did not care for this random man barely remember.
"yes, reach out to him ok?" he smiled at the camera
"yes theodore kennedy nivison junior. love you. byeeeee" and with that you ended the call.
you didnt really think about teds call all that much, untill around 3 months later you recieved a text from an unknown number
even though schlatt then tried ghosting you, ted finally convinced him to man up and keep talking to one of the few people living where he was soon moving
over the span of a month you two had been constantly talking, to the point where you were starting to consider him as one of your closest friends
you would facetime atleast once a day, text everyday, and you even streamed twice together on your account
you were getting very excited to have a new friend so close by
then came the storm.
you lived alone with your dog, and you knew your house would not be ready for this shit.
you stalked up on food, blankets, flashlights
basically anything you could get your hands on
and you bunkered down at your house with your dog, getting ready to thug the next few days out
you were scrolling on your phone, on the first night of the storm, power already out, house fucking freezing, and you see schlatt had posted on his snap story
you open it to find a video of him yelling outside of a completely dark marriot
screaming about how thats where he is supposed to be staying
and you were getting very worried, like your new friend who youve never met in person, might deadass freeze to death.
so you did what any caring soul like yourself would do
you swipe up on his story with your address and a follow up message saying "pull up to mi casa papi 🍆 "
and hope he would hurry so you could go to bed
around twenty minutes later you layed cuddled with your dog bundled in over ten blankets
when felt your house fucking shake with how hard schlatt was banging on your door
you walked downstairs, and opened the door, to a giant, shivering, and covered in snow schlatt, who you immediatly wrapped in a hug and dragged upstairs
"c'mon lets get you nice and warm." you brought him to your room where you turned your bed into a nice warm spot for him "i have some clothes for you, they were my brothers so they should fit" you smiled up at him
he hadnt said much yet and you could see the stress seeping through his face, he dropped his stuff and kinda just hugged you.
"you ok?" you laugh as he pulls away from the hug. he smiles sadly before sitting down on your bed
"ive been better ill be honest" he laughed quietly.
"some first day here huh?" you pat him on the back, trying to comfort him.
"you could say that. holy shit i thought that was a stuffed animal" he says looking at your dog
"go change dumbass, bathrooms on the right" you watch as schlatt takes the clothes and walks to your bathroom, you think you even hearhim flick on the light switch.
"do you want a flashlight?" you yell out to him, to which you get a small "please" back in return, you laugh and leave a flashlight infront of the door
you get comfy in the small sofa in your room, as schlatt was not going to fit on it, and your other bedroom was turned into your office. but you didnt mind him taking the bed
he came out of the bathroom minutes later and quietly shut the door behind him when he turned around he was looking at you kinda funny
you began to ask what was wrong before he cut you off "absolutely not, im not kicking you off your bed, get up" he towered over you on the sofa
"schlatt shut the fuck up, your not fitting on this thing, i barely do."
"you have a king size bed, were sharing, me you and that oddly stuffed animal looking dog c'mon get a move on" he got into the bed and waited for you and your dof to follow him
you laughed and made your way over, your dog following closely behind. you flop down onto the bed and look at the man laying next to you
"crazy this is the first time we're meeting" he says getting comfy
you lay another blanket on the both of you as your dog jumps up on the bed and lays between the two of you "im glad ted introduced us" you take a moment to inspect him
you two had called on discord many times and FaceTimed, but nothing lived up to the real thing.
"im really happy he introduced us too."
guys i kinda hate how this turned out
sorry 😣 😥 😦 😧 😨 😪 😢 😞 😰 😿 🫤 ❤️🩹 ☹️ 😐
#jschlatt#schlatt#jschlatt x reader#ted nivison#schlatt x reader#jschlatt x you#twitch streamer#schlatt x content creator#schlatt imagine#schlatty#jschlatt fanfic#jschaltt#jschatt#tednividon#chuckle sandwich#youtube#content creator#streamer#streamer reader x content creator schlatt#schlattslonghairytoes
204 notes
·
View notes
Text
RATING THE ENTITIES ON HOW FUN THEY'D BE AT MONOPOLY:
1. The Flesh - 1/10, wont stop trying to use severed body parts as its player token, houses, and hotels. This would be fine if they werent so fresh and thus staining the board. Brought meatloaf and refused to specify what meat was actually involved. We agreed to order pizza instead.
2. The Desolation - 4/10, is a sore loser and barely wants to play as intended. It mostly keeps trying to flip the damn board and when finally realizing its temper tantrum won't work, they just give all their assets to one player to tilt the game unfavorably like a dick.
3. The Lonely - 5/10, didn't show up on time, didn't play, and mostly sat on the couch for all of game night watching reruns of Golden Girls. This is due to the lonely feeling one gets when realizing you'll never have friends like The Golden Girls. They still get a point for watching though.
4. The Dark - 2/10, at first they just kept flipping off the lights which made it hard to play but when The Desolation suggested candles (the only helpful thing they did all evening) The Dark responded by leaking dark water all over which got the money and chance/community cards wet.
5. The Spiral - 6/10, just enjoyed going around and around and around on the board, sorta played? Mostly lied about how much money they had or owed or what chance/community card they pulled. This was because, "math is for losers." Thus, they did whatever they could to quickly get back to going around and around the board.
6. The Vast - 4/10, played the game, didnt perform any antics, but they kept pointing out their vast amount of wealth after getting hotels on the first row. Points lost for being a prick. I will say, from time to time, I would get the over whelming feeling that I was falling. This wasn't a large issue until it happened to The Spiral and suddenly no one can seem to find the bathroom in petty revenge.
7. The Slaughter - 0/10, killed the pizza man. This provided two major headaches: a deadbody to deal with and the pizza being ruined from being dropped. Luckily, The Flesh found use for the dead body. As for dinner, we resorted to just munching on the snacks. Also, its really uncomfortable being threatened whenever they happen to land on your property and owe you rent.
8. The Corruption - 3/10, always brings rotten snacks covered in mold. Uses live bugs for pieces which aside from being gross is just not effective cause they dont stay still. How can I recall that their property has three houses when the peices are crawling on my wall? I also just think it is common courtesy to shower before coming over to game night.
9. The Hunt - 8/10, overly competitive but focused on the game and largely helped wrangle the others. Did keep making references to Wolf of Wall Street though which got old quick. It is worth mentioning that they also talked alot about their various hunting trips and buddies which was fine at first until they started describing a recent hunt that I think may have been my coworker who went missing last week.
10. The Eye - 2/10, cheater. Fucking. Cheater. I didn't even know you could cheat that many ways in Monopoly. Also they brought the lead pipe from a Cluedo board as their game piece and kept giggling when I asked why. Further, it is rude to pressure a trade deal by use of blackmailing. Had a lengthy argument about how technically you dont have to draw from the top of the Chance and Community Chest pile
11. The Buried - 8/10, dirt everywhere and I can't be certain but I think they made my chairs smaller? Maybe it was the table? I felt far too close to everyone. I will say they did mostly play the game but you will feel buried beneath your debt after landing on their property which... now that i think about it.. why was their rent so high? That can't be right..
12. The Web - 7/10, much like insects spiders are NOT a suitable game piece. Didn't technically cheat but managed to get ridiculous trade deals from everyone, especially The Spiral. The Desolation gave all their assests to The Eye to screw over The Web but.. to be honest the game is still going and I.. is it possible to have a stalemate in monopoly?
13. The End - 9/10, played the game but kept saying we should up the stakes by having losers die. I explained that this was the sort of game where if it goes on long enough, death is actually the preferred alternative. They understood and got really quiet for awhile. I think they are to blame for why I'm up past my bedtime. I'm growing afraid they'll all still be playing by next week.
14. The Stranger - 6/10, tried to pretend they were my mom. I know they arent my mom. So they taunted me bu saying they were my dad. This was effective as I don't know my dad. Asshole move. Also, would not stop commenting how dry my skin looked. Other than that, yeah actually played the game!
15. The Extinction - 0/10, when it was finally time for everyone to leave we all learned why Extinction had not shown up. Bad news, the outside world has been nuked. The good news is that I don't think I have to pay rent anymore. Or go to work. Oh god. What do I do about groceries?
#the magnus archives#tma#magnus archives#the magnus pod#the magpod#tma podcast#tma s1#tma s2#tma s3#tma shitpost#tma s4#tma s5#tma spoilers#the spiral#the desolation#the end#the flesh#the extinction#the vast#the hunt#the slaughter#the dark#the eye#the web#the corruption#the lonely#the stranger
210 notes
·
View notes
Note
There better be a part 2 of "they say something hurtful in an argument" where they realized they fucked up. I swear on God's name I will not stop crying if you don't.
P.s: very good writing keep it up! ❤️
Side Note: I didnt think that there would be so many requests on part 2, so thank you all for the requests and the support! It helps staying motivated to keep writing :) I hope you'll like this!
Making up after an argument
Part 1: They say something hurtful in an argument
Tags: hurt/comfort, slight angst, making up
Characters: Shanks, Benn Beckman, Dracule Mihawk
Shanks
He feels bad about what he said right after he saw that flash of hurt on your face, the sadness in your eyes and your quiet apology. Shanks immediately wanted to go after you when you left the room, but he was so wrung up in his blanket that he first had to untangle himself before he could go after you. He didnt care how he looked like, his shirt was all the way open, his pants were pulled up above his knee on one leg and on the other it hung down normally and his hair was a mess too. His shoes were completly forgotten somewhere in the room.
When he opened the door from his cabin with a rush and walked outside into the hallway, you were long gone. He instantly went looking for you, starting on deck and working all the way down.
His crewmembers, especially his closest friends, gave him weird looks and concerned stares, but he ignored all of their questions and just ran around looking for you. When he finally finds you, crying on the floor in a dark storage room, he felt a pang go through his heart.
He slowly came closer to you, not wanting to startle you, and started talking quietly.
"Hey, sweet cheeks" he said, sitting down next to you. "Is it alright if i touch you?" he said as he carefully laid his hand on your ellbow.
Seeing you in this state made him want to just wrap his arms around you, pull you close and kiss you all over and apologize to you a thousand times, but he held himself back. This wasnt what you needed right now.
When you didnt react to his touch, he laid his other hand on your shoulder. Shanks tried to catch your eyes, but your face was burried in your legs and your hands were shielding your head from him.
"Darling please look at me" he pleaded, and slowly you raised your head. He laid his other hand on your cheek and his warmth immediately comforted you, but you didnt want to give into his warmth. When Shanks saw your tear struck face and this unbearable sadness in your eyes, he mentally cursed himself for saying those reckless words.
"I'm sorry for what I said. I had no right to let my hangover frustration out on you. Please, forgive me. I love you, my sweet little dove" he tried to apologize.
"Am I really the reason?" you quietly asked, hiccuping from all the crying.
"What?" Shanks looked at you confused.
"Am I the reason why you keep drinking so much? Am I that insufferable?" you cried out, your body shaking at the thought.
"No, no! That wasnt what I meant, please, listen to me! You are the best thing that ever happened to me, and I cant lose you. What I said was mean and a lie. Please believe me when I say I never wanted to hurt you. Please believe me that I didnt mean those words."
Shanks was on the verge of crying himself. The thought that he made his partner feel so bad made him hate himself, swearing to never get this drunk again that he would hurt his lover. He was scared you'd leave him. He wanted to make you feel better, but that was a difficult task when he himself was the reason why you were crying and shaking on the floor. He carefully put his arms around you and placed you on his lap and pressed a small kiss to your forehead.
"It's okay, cry how much you want. Be angry at me, hit me, let all your feelings out on me, I deserve it. But please" he swallowed hard "please dont be sad. Please dont leave me. Not because of my stupid mouth."
You looked up at him when he said that. You noticed his pained face and the fear in his eyes. A fear that he messed up for good. You still felt hurt, but you knew Shanks would never toy with your feelings like that. He was serious about this apology.
You pressed your head in his chest and your tears started to dry out. After a time of silence and him gently stroking your back, you murmered a "I love you, you drunk idiot" into his chest. Shanks felt a stone fall from his heart as he chuckled a bit, leaned down and kissed you on the head. "I love you too, so much pumpkin. I'll never hurt you again. I'll stop drinking so much. Pirate promise"
Benn Beckman
Beckman sighed for the seemingly hundreth time. He still stood on deck, leaning against the railing as he thought about what he had said. He didnt meant to hurt you, but he knew giving you a bit space for now was the right thing. When you calmed down he planned on talking to you, but right now he also needed to sort his own thoughts.
He regretted his words instantly after they left his mouth but the damage was done. He sighed again. Usually he would have smoked at least half a package of cigarettes by now, but he just couldnt bring himself to touch one. Those stupid things were the reason why he made his partner sad. No, bullshit. He couldnt blame anyone else than himself for this. He fucked up.
With one last sigh he left his place at the railing and went underdeck to find you. He had a guess where you were and what you'd be doing, so he went straight to your cabin. He calmed himself with a deep breath in and breath out before he knocked on your door and then slowly opened it.
He wasnt suprised at what he saw. You were at your desk, working away on whatever was laying on your table. Benn carefully stepped into your room and closed the door. You didnt give him any sign that you acknowledged his presence. He walked over to you and waited if you'd say something.
Benn wasnt sure how to approach, so he looked at the papers on your desk. When he saw how shaky your handwriting was and how the ink mixed with waterdrops at some places he sighed again, feeling helpess as he made his own partner cry.
"Hey, I'm sorry about what I said. It wasnt right of me. I let out my stress on you eventho you were only worried about me. I'm deeply sorry."
Benn apologized, but you didnt respond nor did you look at him. He got restless, the uneasy feeling in him became stronger with every second you didnt say anything. You were just writing away on your papers.
"Buttercup, please. I am really sorry. I didnt want to hurt your feelings. You know I love you deeply."
There was a begging undertone in Benns voice by now.
"You dont smell like smoke" was the only answere he got, and hearing your voice immediately eased his anxious feelings a bit.
"I just...couldnt bring myself to touch them" he admitted.
You turned to look at him.
"Maybe i should be upset because of you more often then?"
He breathed out as he sensed that you werent that upset at him anymore. There was a joking undertone in your words, but it was clear that you still were hurt. He laid his hand on yours and leaned down, pressing his forehead to yours.
"Please no. I cant handle this. I cant handle seeing you upset. I'm sorry, princess, i'll really try my best to smoke less. Please, I want to make things right again, I-"
He stopped when you laid your hand on his cheek, softly caressing it.
"I know that you're sincer when you start rambling, Benn Beckman."
Dracule Mihawk
Mihawk knew he fucked up big time when he wanted to go look for you but couldnt find you. He noticed your belongings were gone, and then saw footprints leaving away from the castle. Your footprints.
It was starting to become night so he immediately ran after you, following your steps through the woods. He prayed the whole time that you were safe, that nothing happened to you, that you didnt get injured because of his inability to deal with his emotions the right way.
It started raining and it got darker and darker. He hoped he'll find you in time. The nights are cold and the animals in the woods can be even more dangerous at night. Mihawk ran even faster as raindrops hit him more frequently, and soon it was pouring down. His clothes were complety soaked, but he couldnt care less. All he could think of was to find you and bring you back to safety.
While Mihawk dashed throught the woods with experience, you on the other hand stumbled around without orientation. Now that the darkness started to rise, you couldnt see anything anymore. The trees were so close to each other that you couldnt orientate yourself on the stars, and barely any moonlight came through either.
You couldnt count anymore how often you tripped or fell down a slope. Your arms, legs and face were covered in small scratches as you continued to push trough. You werent even entirely sure where you were going, but all you knew was that you wanted to put as much distance in between you and Hawkeye as possible.
Tears still welled up at the thought of him. Those soft moments between you two all seemed like a lie. You shook your head to get rid of those thoughts and carried on. You kept on walking, but a root stood out of the ground and made you trip again. You fell and slithered down another small slope and just as you cursed to yourself you heard a noise.
You stayed quietly on the ground as you listened, not sure if you misheared. No, there were definetely steps. But they were too heavy to be from a human. And Mihawk wouldnt come either. So what was that?
Then you heard a sniffing sound and a roar. And that's when you also got your answer. It was a bear. You tried to stay as calm as possible, but soon you realized why the bear roared so much. You fell in between the bear and it's cup. Which was the worst thing you could do - get in between a mother bear and her child.
You slowly started to crawl backwards, but the mother bear roared again and you heard her coming closer. You tried to hold your breath as you saw her shadowy figure infront of you, and the moment the bear roared almost into your face, you tried to stand up and run away, but of course that didnt work with a bear in front of you. You fell on your butt and tried to ready yourself for the heavy impact with the bears paw which she had raised, when a tall figure was infront of you suddenly, holding a big sword you'd recognise everyhwere. Mihawk. He wielded his sword and cut the ground, and the bear mother and her cup both ran away.
When he turned to face you, you couldnt decipher what his facial expression meant. You sat there, on the ground, cuts all over you and wet from the rain as he suddenly quickly walked up to you. You wanted to stand up, to talk with him, but before you could even say his name he was on the ground with you, kissing you feverishly.
You were confused about what was going on suddenly, but Mihawk pressed you against him in a way you couldnt escape. Not that you really wanted to, cause you felt so many emotions in this one kiss. Fear, anger, sadness, relieve... it seemed like all of those pent up emotions he couldnt let out came through in this kiss.
After what seemed like eternity did he break the kiss, panting as he looked at you.
"I'm so glad you're okay. I'm so glad you're alive. I- I love you."
Was all he said and you looked at him in shock. It was a rare treat to hear those words from him, and you didnt expect to ever hear them again. But here he was, saving you in the middle of the night, telling you his feelings.
"I-I know that you're always worried when I leave. I just didnt know how to break it to you when i had to leave for so long. I not only see the disappointment and worry in your face, I also see fear and sadness whenever i leave. I just...I didnt know how I should tell you that I had to leave for months, fighting some idiots without seeing you all sad about the fact that I might not come back? That's why i left without saying anything. I know i hurt you, my love. I know I said something cruel back in the castle. But this castle is not my home when you arent in it. I'm sorry for hurting you. I didnt know how to express myself. Please, forgive me. I'll work on it."
You only stared in shock as Mihawk talked about his feelings so much. But then a small smile broke out on your lips.
"You're an idiot. But you're my idiot."
He didnt respond, he only blushed which you didnt see in the dark nights, but then he picked you up and started carrying you back to your home.
#akagami no shanks#benn beckman#red hair shanks#shanks#shanks x reader#beckman#benn beckman x reader#dracule mihawk#mihawk#mihawk x reader#one piece#one piece shanks#beckman x reader#hawkeye
863 notes
·
View notes
Text
thought i'd share my thought process for this fun lil piece / outfit in full display that i whipped out for beckory on valentines cuz i really had a lotta fun making it <3
OKAY first off, big thanks to @leaky-heart for helpin me gather some really cool outfit refs and for lending me resources where I can find a ref for bonnie's guitar in a 3d space. Thank you bestie, yar a life saver <3
Second, @/littleleaflings' jacket—goated af, will never stop gushin bout it aaaaAAA <3
Okay so looking at freddy & bonnie's designs—i am in love with how their dominant and accent colors are opposite of each other like a yin and yang situation. So i absolutely tried to incorporate that when rearranging the palette unto beckory's outfit
Fronnie's colors arent the only contrasting elements about them. Aside from their earrings, even their symbols are a pair—i love how freddy's is a lighting bolt but he is also associated with stars on the side cuz of his branding. While bonnie's is a star but he also has lightning bolts on the side (the purple accent in his fit) to match freddy
And to sprinkle a bit of beckory flair, i put stripe lines across their pants (if you look back on my ref sheet for the squad, the three amigos all have stripes somewhere in their fits, i purposely designed that to be their thing) just to also unify the patterns from their top
i gave tony a scarf to match greg's bow tie accessory. Its a combo homage to bonnie's headband and bunny ears in a way (cuz the ribbons on its ends look like droopy rabbit ears) i gave them gloves to compensate being unable to add punk bracelets on em cuz it would be too much for the overall look (same logic applies to the star shades, its to match with the top hat)
Also this was such a pure coincidence but i also realized beckory wears their fazwatches in the same placement as fronnie wears their earrings on. That actually makes me very happy, i think its a really cool coincidence
And as yall can see, Greg's jacket initially had stars on his sleeves (like it does in the ref), but i decided against putting it in the final cuz im startin to think it might look cluttered and hard to read from afar and tbh, I really liked how the translucent sleeves turned out... I didnt want the star pattern to cover it up lol
And thats pretty much it, thank you coming to my ted talk!! <3
if youre interested to see more of my art process compilation like this you can check over on my ko-fi page, you can support me by buying me a latte cuz I am planning to post more exclusive stuff like this over there in the future so I hope yall look forward to that! I deeply appreciate yall and thank you so much in advance!!
#daske art#fnaf#beckory#gregtony#GTY46#fnaf gregory#tony becker#five nights at freddy's#fnaf sb#fnaf security breach#fnaf GGY#five nights at freddy's security breach#detective rabbit#fnaf tales from the pizzaplex#five nights at freddy's tales from the pizzaplex
546 notes
·
View notes
Text
*✧・゚: *✧・゚: fall in love ✧
╰┈➤ why would they fall in love with you and how long does it take?
. . ⇢ ˗ˏˋpairing ot7 x gn!reader
. . . ⇢ ˗ˏˋgenre fluff
. . . ⇢ ˗ˏˋwarnings none
. . . ⇢ ˗ˏˋnote hii, sorry for not posting anything in a while. i was trying to organize my life and not die trying lol
✦➼mark lee ┈ 1 month
✦- mark is someone who falls in love quickly. you two met through mutual friends, so when your group of friends go hang outr you two were the same. you had seemed attractive to him since he met you. but what made him fall for you was your personality. the fact that you were so sweet and cheerful made him notice you like he has never noticed anyone else. because mark likes energetic and outgoing people (haechan), and you having those qualities made it difficult for him not to fall in love.
✦➼huang renjun ┈ 6 months
✦- really what takes time for him is not to fall in love, but to realize that he is in love. he fell in love with you because of your intelligence. since he met you, he already knew that you were intelligent. you two werent really close, but one day he had the opportunity to approach you and have a conversation, and from that moment he began to fall in love. it took him a long time to accept it. his friends always commented and pointed out the way he saw you but he always denied it. he began to realize when one day he talked about you and how intelligent and interesting you were.
✦➼lee jeno ┈ 3 months
✦- i think we can all agree that someones love language is acts of service. ao probably when he sees that you are the same or very similar to him in that sense, he will feel butterflies in his stomach. jeno would fall in love with your kindness and your way of expressing your love by caring for others. he started to realize when you did something for him. it was something simple, but he really appreciated that you having that love language. and from there there was no turning back, every small act of kindness and service that you did, he noticed and thought it was so nice on your part. until he acepted something that it was already obvious, he had fallen in love with you.
✦➼lee donghyuck ┈ 2 weeks
✦- our fullsun... he falls in love so easly. not with everything, but, your talent was his weak point. he started to feel butterflies when he saw you show your talent. he swears that cupid was behind him and shot an arrow right into his heart. he kept thinking about it for the next few days, impressed by you. it only took a couple of conversations for him to be charmed by you. before telling you he did wait a little because he thought it was too soon. plus that would give him time to win you over.
✦➼na jaemin ┈ 5 months
✦- you could say that jaemin was love at first sight. he saw you and immediately felt in love. you seemed beautifully dazzling to him. he didnt miss the opportunity to approach you to get to know you. it took him a while to really fall in love, but for him your beauty was enough for him to be interested in you. after a few months he realized that he had fallen in love with the most beautiful person his eyes could have ever seen. likewise, other factors such as your personality helped him fall.
✦➼zhong chenle ┈ 7 months
✦- chenle had a hard time falling in love with you. but it's not your fault, dont worry. it's hard for him to fall in love because she's afraid of being vulnerable in a certain way. but with you it was inevitable, how your personalities fit so well it was enough for him to fall slowly. your spontaneity and your ability to do something fun easily made him fall in love with you. it was difficult for him to realize it because at first he thought it was just friendship. but when he finally accepted it, he was a little afraid that you didnt feel the same, so it took him a while to confess.
✦➼park jisung ┈ 1 month
✦- jisung, another one who falls in love easily. maybe he was so nice to you that you could melt. it was your great sense of humor that made him fall in love. you seemed like such a funny and fun person. but that made him feel so shy and somewhat intimidated. he believed that he would never be at your level or that you would never notice him. but one day a miracle happened for him, you spoke to him. and there it was clear that he was in love.
#kpop x reader#nct reactions#nct scenarios#nct headcanons#nct x gender neutral reader#nct x male reader#nct x female reader#nct x reader#nct dream x reader#mark x reader#mark fluff#mark headcanons#renjun x reader#renjun fluff#renjun headcanons#jeno x reader#jeno fluff#jeno headcanons#haechan x reader#haechan fluff#haechan headcanons#jaemin x reader#jaemin fluff#jaemin headcanons#chenle x reader#chenle fluff#chenle headcanons#jisung x reader#jisung fluff#jisung headcanons
316 notes
·
View notes
Note
In overwhelmed, it mentions that Y/N used to be in a dark hole and how Wanda is afraid she’d go back to it. Can you write about it? Like what happened?
hope ur ok
pairings: mom!wanda × daughter!reader (platonic)
warnings: depressed reader, cryingg, bad thoughts, and sad sad things
a/n: okay how did you pay so much attention to what i wrote in overwhelmed bc i didnt even remember writing that 😭 BUT THANK YOU for the request i literally just ramble what was in my head but hope you like it love!
HOW YOU CAN HELP PALESTINE!
You don't know when it started, much less why it started. Maybe a few days ago, a month ago, maybe a year ago the signs that something was wrong started to appear. It was almost as if these feelings were always there, just hidden by a layer that was slowly removed and made everything more difficult. It seemed like there were days when you could easily deal with it, maybe ignoring it or just hiding it very well, you didn't know. But there were days that were more difficult. It was more difficult to get out of bed, your appetite was barely there, you didn't want to leave your room, just stay in darkness and total silence. Even though this silence made your head spin, it was better than anyone talking and making you even more depressed.
If someone asked the people closest to you if you were sensitive, you were sure that more than half of them would say no. They would talk about how you had a frozen heart, that you didn't cry when you watched a sad movie, that you didn't fall in love with the character when watching or reading a novel, that you didn't care when someone was fighting with you. But deep down, you knew it was a lie. You felt hard feelings most of the time, including when watching sad films. Maybe you just don't like showing the sadness and emptiness you feel. It makes you feel weak, worthless, and selfish, especially selfish. You shouldn't feel this way, not when you had the perfect life: a loving mother, food on the table, new clothes, and expensive sneakers. Then why?
You didn't really care that you felt depressed, you knew that eventually it would pass, just like every other time - even if that feeling came back some time later, even worse. It wasn't like anyone noticed and said anything to you, even though you were sure most of the adults around you blamed it on teenage hormones when they saw you sulking or just isolating yourself in your room all day. Maybe a few questions like 'are you okay?', even though they knew you would respond with something positive even if everything was falling apart. But there was always someone. Someone who knew that it wasn't just teenage hormones but something that was slowly consuming you. Wanda, your mother, was that someone, and she certainly didn't let those details slip.
The first time you actually showed that you were in a depressing state was on a random Thursday at six-thirty in the morning. Wanda didn't mind much in the first moments when you refused to get out of bed, it was normal for any teenager to not be able to stand school. But when you finally decided to show up for the morning in the Compound's kitchen, she was surprised. You had big black bags under your eyes that were tired and red, looking like you hadn't slept well that night and maybe you had been crying most of it. Wanda didn't take long to ask if something had happened and if you were okay, only receiving a murmur of something like ‘'m fine' before turning back to look at the emptiness of space. Tony who was nearby joked “Maybe the red eyes are because of something she used. Don't tell me you snuck out to a party, Mini Maximoff?”, you'd laugh on any other day, even replying something like 'Yes, I did some hard drugs at a party. How do you know?', but that wasn't the case. Stark laughed to himself after saying that sentence but soon the sound of his voice disappeared when he realized that you hadn't heard him and, apparently, nothing around you.
The second time was right after a mission Wanda had done. It was only three days away from you and everything seemed different when she came back. The first thing she noticed was that you didn't run into her arms when she stepped inside the Compound, much less respond to the messages she sent you a few hours earlier. Obviously like a worried mother she went after you, not taking long to find you in your room with all the lights off, two blankets around your body and how it looked like the things in your room had been in the same place since your mother left for the mission. She turned on the light in your room, hearing a soft growl leave your lips. You were awake and conscious, so it didn't make sense for you to want to be lying down and almost sinking into your mattress at four o'clock in the afternoon. She remembered when you were little and couldn't sleep if at least one light wasn't on, now it was ironic to think that you just lived in the darkness and emptiness of your room without fear that some monster would catch you, because no monster could hurt you like depression was.
Wanda couldn't count how many more episodes like those happened and lasted for several days. She was worried, very worried. She was afraid that you would end up doing something that would hurt you, end everything. It was obvious that your mother tried to ask you what was wrong, how she could help you, but you always said that you just woke up on the wrong foot that morning and that everything was fine. Of course, how were you going to tell her what was happening if you didn't even know. There was no reason for you to feel down like that and not even the absurd desire to just want to close your eyes and not open them again. And every day that passed, this dark hole you were in would get deeper and deeper. You knew you needed to ask for help before it was too late.
It was no longer strange when once again that week you had no will to live. You look at the clock next to your bed and realize that your mother would be coming to your room to call you for another day in two minutes and a few seconds. Just the thought of 'one more day' made you want to throw up the food you didn't even eat the day before, as that empty feeling made your hunger go away. But as much as vomiting, you wanted to cry, cry until you couldn't take it anymore. And it was no surprise when the tears started to fall and you couldn't stop. Even though you are not a loud person, trying to keep yourself in your own bubble, the sobs wanted to get out of your throat anyway.
“Darling?” Wanda didn't mind knocking on your bedroom door in the morning, since you would be sleeping, well, not at that moment. When she heard the choking sounds you were making to keep from crying, she didn't take long to run towards your body on the bed and get under your covers, pressing you against her chest giving the perfect comfort to let you know that you weren't alone. “Oh, my love.” Wanda has seen you cry, many, many times, but it was so different to see you cry as if you were drowning in a sea and needed help from someone, anyone. “It's okay, Mama is here.” With each passing minute it seemed like the tears were getting even bigger than before, but you tried to focus on Wanda's heartbeat as you placed your hand on her chest, making you feel calmer despite all the panic.
The lullaby that starts to leave her lips and go straight to your ear makes you start paying attention to the soft melody and not your terrible thoughts. The language Wanda sang in, Sokovian, was not understood by you, but you still remembered when she sang you to sleep on the days you had nightmares. It was as if Wanda was using her magic to calm you down, even though you knew she would never use her powers on you without your permission, but her voice was so sweet that it was more powerful than any of her red magic. Your breathing becomes soft and your movements slow, as if you were choosing the right words to get rid of that moment, but with your mother there it was almost impossible to lie.
“I wanna get help,” You murmur for just her to hear, despite there being no one else in the room with you two. “b-but I don’t even know why I’m like this.” Your crying had stopped, but you still choked to say a few words. Admitting those words out loud seemed like a challenge for you, and when you said them, a weight seemed to lift off your back despite not having yet deciphered all your feelings. And Wanda knew that. She knew how hard you were to avoid looking like a weak person even if you weren't, even if asking for help wasn't a sign of weakness but rather of improvement.
Your mother kisses your head, taking a few seconds before cupping your face and looking at it. “I'm so proud of you, my angel.” You didn't see pity or lies in the expression on her face. You didn't see disappointment and much less as if you were a problem for her. “I'm glad you want to ask for help, and I'm here for it, yeah?” You felt a little guilty when you saw a tear come out of your mother's eyes, but she was still smiling. The same smile you saw when you woke up, or when you told her some good news, or even when you told her a joke. Wanda never wanted you to feel anything negative about her. She never took out any frustration on you, never made you feel bad when you got a bad grade at school, or when you accidentally knocked a glass on the floor. “I will help you with whatever you need, my love. It will be slow, but I promise that the tightness in your chest will pass, okay?”
“I trust you.” She nods before pulling you into a hug that she knew you needed more than anything at that moment. The process would take a long time until you felt well again, you both knew that, but it was never too late. It's never too late to ask for help, because it's normal to need someone to pull you out of the dark hole sometimes, it's normal to not feel good all the time. Having feelings is normal, even if sometimes they are too deep, or too shallow. You just needed to realize that you were never alone, that people around care about you and will always want the best for you.
“I love you so much. Always remember that.”
“I love you too, Mama.”
#avengers imagine#marvel cinematic universe#marvel imagine#mcu imagine#wanda maximoff x female reader#wanda marvel#wanda maximoff x reader#wanda maximoff fanfiction#wanda maximoff#wanda x you#wanda x reader#wanda maximoff x daughter!reader#wanda maximoff x you#wanda maximoff fic#wanda fanfic#wanda x y/n#elizabeth olsen x reader#elizabeth olsen imagine#elizabeth olsen#elizabeth olsen x female reader#elizabeth olsen x y/n#marvel#wanda maximoff marvel#wanda maximoff imagine#wanda maximoff oneshot#wanda maximoff comfort#wanda maximoff angst#wanda maximoff au
172 notes
·
View notes
Text
Chapter One
Pairing: Black Fem!Reader x Hitman Toji Fushiguro
CW: Profanity, Hints of Explicit Sexual Content, Fluff, Comfort
Word Count: Don't worry about it.
Summary:
“I’m only going to say this one more time, Toji. I don’t do situationships. I don’t do friends with benefits or the occasional hookup. You want more? I want you to try. Earn me.”
His hands are so bloody, that if you ever knew the source, you would'nt want someone like him to try. He shouldn't be here, taking up so much of your time, asking for more. But he's selfish.
-or; Toji, a notorious hitman, moves to America for more money and a better life for his son. He didnt expect to sleep with you, let alone want more. When his dangerous life catches up to him, he takes on one final lucrative hit, but realizes this target has unseen connections hitting closer to home. Now he must navigate a perilous job while desperately keeping his criminal double life hidden from you.
Authors Notes: Hello! I hope you all enjoy this first chapter. As stated in the masterlist, this fic is a continuation from Maneater, so reading that will definitely help set the tone for this fic. I plan to dig deep with this story and really find my voice writing a different genre.
As always, reblogs, comments, and likes are always appreciated! Enjoy and thank you for your support!
| Twitter | Ao3| Masterlist | Prologue | Next Chapter
Dividers: @royallaesthetics @eloquentmoon | Header: created by myself (fanart from Pinterest)
©mysteria157, all rights reserved. DO NOT copy, plagiarize, reupload, modify, or translate (without permission) my work to other accounts and platforms.
…women like you drown oceans -Rupi Kaur
*** You ***
Pop!
The sharp sound of gum expanding and then exploding causes you to flinch, your eyeliner pen frozen just above your lid. Through the mirror’s reflection, you shoot a glare at the open closet door, where your cousin rummages through your clothes.
Pop!
She’s in her own little world. If this were any other circumstance, she would have been scolded for her habit of popping gum—a top offender on the list of annoying behaviors ingrained in both of you since childhood. You detest the sound, and if you were closer, you would have punched her in the stomach by now.
You and your cousin typically get along well, but she enjoys testing your limits to coax you out of your shell. The only way to shut her up is by letting her tire herself out during her talkative rampages or swinging at her when you’ve had enough.
Every day with her is a gamble of which will come first.
Your eyeliner is still hovering by your upper lid, suspended in place as you watch another sundress get haphazardly thrown against the closet wall instead of being put back on a hanger where it fucking belongs.
You can’t bother with trying to get violent with her, you’re way too preoccupied with other thoughts. More incessant thoughts like how to play it cool on a date. It’s not that hard, right? Be yourself, get a gauge of the man trying to impress you, entertain a few hours of your day and then back home to relax.
Easy.
If it were anyone else but Toji, then it would be easy.
You had buried yourself in double shifts and extended hours in the lab just to distract yourself from today. Anything to keep you busy and keep your mind off the fact that someone you are sort of interested in…wants to see you. And he reminds you every day when you look down at your phone.
Despite his admission of being a lazy texter, Toji is surprisingly consistent. But the messages take on a blunt form wrapped around a small pearl of care.
Toji: Eat breakfast. What good are you in a hospital if you pass out?
Toji: Stop taking on more shifts, its stupid. Go home and rest.
Toji: You better not be tired this weekend.
No matter how hard you try to force your face to stay immobile, each text makes your lips twitch into a small smile. He masks his words in harsh deliveries, but the intention is obvious. The satisfying jolt that shoots up your spine when your phone buzzes with a notification from him should be embarrassing. It should be.
But you love it.
It’s absurd, really. Only two weeks have passed since you met him, hardly enough time to form any meaningful connection. Yet, that night at your uncle’s was unexpectedly delightful. Toji was, against your better judgment, charming and attentive, almost to the point of clinginess. And, undeniably, he’s attractive. And a fucking fantastic lay.
So, despite your instinct to ignore a man and the way they flaunt their feathers for your attention, you want Toji to bring that same energy as last time.
You lean your elbows back into the shiny wood of your vanity, focusing your attention on your eye as you lower the eyeliner to your skin.
Pop!
The sound makes you jump, disrupting your focus and smearing the eyeliner across your temple.
“Rene!” you bark, slamming your eyeliner down on the vanity top with a force that makes your hand sting, and you yank a drawer open in search of a makeup wipe. “Stop popping your gum before I come over there and beat the shit out of you.” As you wipe off the smudged makeup, you catch the reflection of your cousin emerging from your closet.
She embodies a beauty that’s almost blinding, matched only by her lively personality. So naturally, heads turn when she enters a room, her chocolate skin seemingly radiant wherever she goes. With her thick, kinky hair always in a protective style and her unshakeable confidence in her intelligence and appearance, Rene caught Shiu’s attention immediately, and he’s been captivated ever since.
She is one of very few in your family who truly gets you, who sees the world with clarity and understands its nuances and how to navigate through it without compromising her ideals. Since childhood, you’ve stuck to each other like glue. She understands you and your guarded demeanor, you understand her and her loud personality. She’s one of your best friends.
But at this moment, as she stands before you in booty shorts and a tank top that accentuates her curves, her twist out cascading from a pineapple updo, and an outfit draped over one arm, she is pissing you off as she pops her gum againwith a cheeky expression.
“I like your makeup.” A sly grin stretches on her face, enhancing her soft features. You ignore her, feeling your defenses rise as she effortlessly peels back your layers. The liquid eyeliner glides against the smooth brown of your skin, forming a subtle cat-eye as you pretend not to notice her approaching you from behind.
She gracefully settles onto your vanity top, ignoring your lipstick casing that teeters over and rolls across the shiny surface. You shoot her another glare before moving to your other eye. “You should put on some mascara too. When you give him head later today, I’m sure he’ll love to see it run down your cheeks and—”
You swing at her not even a second later, landing a solid smack on the side of her thigh. “UM Ow?!”
“Um?? Shut the fuck up,” you growl, sneering at her with a leveling scowl that you hope cuts through her.
It doesn’t.
Rene snorts, shrugging off the vanity and moving to your bed to change her clothes. As she pulls your dark jeans over her thick thighs, you can’t help but wonder if you should dress more…sexy? Your jean shorts reveal enough skin, and the jersey fits snugly around your torso. You’re no stranger to dressing to the nines and making heads turn just like her, but you value practicality more than appeal. It’s a football game, after all, and you love football. Why bother looking overly sexy when you’ll be screaming and stuffing hotdogs and pretzels in your mouth?
Despite the logic, a hand of insecurity tightens around your throat.
Rene, like the annoyingly clairvoyant bitch she is, tastes the shift in the air and rolls her eyes at you through the mirror’s reflection. “You look fucking amazing. Toji asked you out—frequently, I might add.”
The memories of his persistence flash through your mind in a rush. Heated touches in the backseat of your truck, sweaty skin sliding against each other, and your mouth dripping with moans of satisfaction were constantly interrupted by his repeated question.
“Let me take you out.”
As if he couldn’t get enough. As if he wanted more. As if he wouldn’t leave your uncle’s house that night until you flat-out told him to leave you alone.
You haven’t entertained a man since your cheating ex, so your defenses remain high and guarded, fortified with brick and mortar, armed to fend off anyone who comes too close.
But in such a short time, Toji managed to advance further than others with hard skin resilient to your attacks, and a constant insistence to be by your side. He’s spoken to you in ways that would have landed others in the ER, yet his words were always laced with harsh care to make you confront your own overreactions instead of hiding.
“Stop acting up and let me be nice to you.”
“You’re not mean to men; you just don’t do bullshit.”
“It’s okay to be a little excited about this,” Rene interjects, slicing through the thick current of your anxiety.
And you are, excited and a little nervous, though you don’t respond to her, simply reaching for your clear lip gloss to finish your makeup.
By the time there is a knock on your door thirty minutes later, you and Rene are ready to go. Your curls are piled high on your head, tendrils falling to frame your face and your hairline slicked with curled edges. There’s a subtle shake in your hands wrapped around the handle of your front door, betraying the calm façade you wear. As you open it, expecting Toji’s familiar face, you’re met with Shiu, a toothpick in his mouth and a gentle smile playing on his lips.
You greet him warmly with a hug, letting him inside. He can only hug you for a second before rushing past you and toward the direction of your room, anxious to see his fiancé. “Don’t fuck on my bed!” you yell after him, loud enough for your cousin to hear.
It’s only a minute later when there’s a knock at the door that makes you jump, shocking you into reality again as you realize that you haven’t moved since inviting Shiu inside. In your stupidity, you look through the peephole and swallow the gasp at Toji’s distorted form.
“I can see your feet. Open the door,” his deep voice cuts, familiar and commanding.
Your fingers curl against the wooden surface of your door, nails scratching lightly along the veneer as you wrestle with the innate temptation to be stubborn. Besides Nanami Kento—another close friend and coworker—Toji is the only man you’ve let talk to you like this. He’s a little bit of an asshole, but beneath his rough exterior lies a tender core that beckons you to peel back the layers like an onion, eager to feel just how soft the bulb is in the center. You’re drawn to him in a way you can’t explain, and it’s a longing that ignites a hunger that you haven’t experienced in a very long time.
With a resigned sigh, you swing the door open to be welcomed by the sight of him, a picture that leaves you momentarily breathless. You swallow the drool that pools instantly in the back of your throat, curl your toes in your sneakers to resist the urge to spring forward and slant your lips against his, and bite the inside of your lip so the twitching on the sides does not turn into a gentle smirk.
“You look good, baby,” his words roll off his tongue effortlessly, his gaze sweeping over you with a knowing intensity. It feels as though he’s studying a heavily guarded masterpiece that he finally has his hands on to steal. He notices every stroke of paint, every blotch that makes you who you are and it’s with a concentration that leaves you dizzy enough to grip the door tighter in your hands.
Though only a week has passed since you last saw him, his presence still grips you with a force that borders on intoxicating. Clad in a black shirt that accentuates his commanding presence, his broad shoulders exude a magnetic strength that summons you, stirring a primal desire to dig your fingernails into him like you did that night in your truck. One of his hands is tucked in a jeaned pocket, the other is behind his back, and jet-black locks brush his cheeks as he chuckles, undoubtedly amused by the dumbfounded stare that you’re still shooting his way. His scar cradles the side of his lips in a seductive curl as he smirks.
God, he’s so—he’s so—
His presence seems to fill the entire room, a tangible force even without crossing the threshold of your home. An urgent ache surges within you, craving the warmth of his embrace, the security of his strength.
“You gonna let me in or just keep your mouth open for the flies?” His voice breaks the reverie in your mind, a well-known blend of annoyance that fills your chest immediately. You’re reminded of how effortlessly irritating he can be, yet there’s a strange allure in his confidence.
At this point, you don’t have a quip loaded up quick enough to shoot back at him. So, you step aside and hold your breath as his large body crosses the threshold of your home.
The last time he was at your door, he barged inside with a barely contained fury and pulled you into an argument that stemmed from your unwillingness to be vulnerable and his lack of expertise in expressing himself. It was a weird song and dance that marked the beginning of something you still don’t fully understand. Now, he’s here with a slightly different demeanor, calm and self-assured as he plants a firm kiss on your cheek as if he’s a hardworking husband returning home just in time for dinner.
You gape at his nonchalance, watching in disbelief as he kicks off his shoes and pulls his hand from behind his back, presenting you a bouquet of flowers in a manner that feels both rushed and sincere. You look down at the flowers, wide-eyed and blinking to make sure the reality you are currently in isn’t actually a simulation.
Daisies.
Not the cheap, wilted blooms you kind of expected from him, but fresh, vibrant flowers. Their white petals gleam softly, each grain of pollen in the yellow center visible in the light of your kitchen. The stems are freshly cut, wrapped in a simple red bow and your chest is fluttering with a severity that unsettles you.
“I didn’t know what kind you liked. And I don’t trust Shiu with an honest answer so…” His words trail off, leaving unspoken sentiments lingering in the air.
Your lips curl around words that won’t form, and you mentally sort through your book of tricks. It’s a book you’ve spent years filling after countless experiences. Men will do just about anything for pussy. There’s no reason to be shocked at why they do the things they do—they’re all the same.
But even from that first day you met, you have already shuffled through your book when it comes to Toji. Every time you look up whatever trick he tries to pull, you come up with an empty page. There’s never a solution or a pre-written response that you can use. You have no choice but to figure this out on your own and fill in the pages later.
“If you don’t like them, you don’t have to take them,” he cuts into your thoughts, words edged with a trace of embarrassment that he’s trying to cover up with frustration. “Just give them back—” He reaches for the flowers, and you reflexively pull your arms away, much to your own shock at the way your body moves on its own.
“I like them,” you blurt out, your voice not as strong as you want it to be but thankfully steady as the words leave your lips. “They’re very nice, Toji. Thank you.”
He drops his hand, shoves it deep into the pocket of his jeans before clearing his throat and giving you a sharp nod. His eyes take in your face for only a second before they flit away to focus on a random spot in your living room, a hint of blush on his cheeks that makes the fluttering in your chest pick up in speed. It’s a weird feeling that will consume you if you don’t stay in control.
So, you push it down, swallow the pool of saliva in your mouth so it can help the glide, all the way down to the pit of your belly to extinguish the embers that threaten to lick to life. You shuffle past him and into the kitchen to fetch a vase, your mind sorting through the symptoms of various pulmonary diseases to distract yourself from the giddiness of him getting you flowers.
A normal thing. The bare minimum for a man. But it makes you feel great all the same. They aren’t your favorite, not even close, but it’s a gesture that shatters your preconceived notions about Toji that probably shouldn’t be there in the first place.
“What are they?” he asks, face still pink below his eyes that linger on the countertop instead of at you. You untie the bow at the stems and slide the daisies into an antique vase with crystalline ridges, shooting him a questioning raised eyebrow in response. One of his hands gestures wildly to the vase you are filling with water. “Your favorite flowers.”
“Snapdragons.” Toji throws you a quizzical look, his eyebrows pinched together in a clear display of confusion that makes you chuckle. You push the now full vase of flowers to the center of your kitchen countertop, the sight warming your stomach no matter how much you try to stop it. “They aren’t in season, but there’s a vendor here that sells them in the Spring and Fall. Growing up, we lived right next to a river where they would grow. My father would pick them every year and bring them to my mother as a gift. Whenever they wilted, he picked more and replaced them…over and over until they weren’t in season anymore.”
You dig your teeth into the wet flesh of your cheek to stop yourself from rambling, the need to talk more about yourself is at the tip of your tongue. He’s quiet as he takes in your response, eyebrows twitching with fleeting emotion before they smooth out into their usual calm expression. Maybe it’s your eyes playing tricks, but he looks as if he’s locked away your little nugget of information and is ready to move on to the next thing.
More of you.
That gaze is now free of shyness and taking you in, sharp and cutting and rough around the edges, his green irises sliding down to the exposed skin of your thighs, and they must beckon him because he makes his way towards you with a dominating presence that tightens your throat. He walks around the countertop, avoiding the sharp edge from biting into his side and now he’s standing in front of you, looming and dwarfing you without even trying. You catch a whiff of his cheap cologne—a different scent from what you smelled before—but still rich with bergamot undertones that make you more curious than bothered at his frugal mentality.
“Can I kiss you? Or you gonna smack me instead?”
Even though he’s teasing, he displays the growing knowledge of your boundaries and the lengths you will go to protect yourself.
“What, you want to get smacked, Toji?” you retort, lifting an eyebrow at him, your neck tingling from the strain of looking up due to his height. God, he’s such a big man. Big and burly and just enough to overwhelm you in a way that you crave so, so much.
“Nah. I want a kiss,” he confidently responds, blowing away the cloud of lust from around your head.
He’s too close and yet not close enough. He smells too good, looks too good with a voice that’s too deep and melodic for you to ride on logic for a full day, but you need him closer, so much closer and—
Your back brushes against the edge of the kitchen sink, making you tense at the realization that he’s backed you up against it and is looking down at you with that nasty smirk you entertain more than you should.
“You…” you begin, trailing off when one of his muscular arms reaches past you to rest onto the counter on one side, still giving you an escape route even though you’ll take being trapped against him any time of the day. “You already kissed me on the cheek when you walked in without asking me. Don’t be stingy.”
Toji clicks his tongue in disappointment, the sound pushing a rush of electricity down your spine that’s generating too much energy between your legs. He shrugs, broad shoulders pulling up and down, stretching his shirt in the most delicious way. “That’s not enough.”
Although lust is darkening your thoughts slowly despite your resolve, you still have enough common sense to remember the kind of woman you are. You’re someone unwilling to tolerate fuckboy behavior and would rather humiliate a man than give in to temptation that would only embarrass you in the future. You have to stay in control. Just for the rest of the day to measure his intentions with a level head. Even though you feel heavy with lidded eyes, you slip into that second skin of yourself with ease.
“Ask nicely,” you whisper.
He takes the bait—like they always do—and slinks further into your space, his broad and muscular form brushes against your softer one. Your gaze remains indifferent as he asks to kiss you in a sing-song voice that’s borderline annoying and teasing, threatening to make you laugh despite your resistance.
You take in his question with a noncommittal hum and slide a hand up the soft fabric of his chest. The muscles underneath flex and twitch beneath your palm, echoing memories of that unforgettable night when you could slide your fingers on the sweat of his abs as you rode him for all he was worth.
Your hand rests against his cheek, watching as he slowly falls for your trap, inhaling deeply with his lips a mere breath away from yours before you speak calmly and softly.
“No.”
You stroke his cheek in a soothing manner before patting it a little too hard that’s close to a smack, yanking a grunt of frustration from him as he pulls away with an bothered growl. You relish in the sigh of his scar twisting when his face curls with annoyance, his eyes rolling and his arms folding across his chest like a child being denied dessert. You can’t help the laugh that bubbles from your lips, growing in intensity as his eyes narrow at you.
“You’re so damn annoying,” he pouts, and the fact that he truly looks put off for not getting a kiss only makes you laugh harder.
***
The sight and sound of cheering fans excite you, filling you with childhood memories of games with your father. As the four of you make your way through the large parking lot and in the direction of the stadium, you take in the display of emotions that cross Toji’s face as he is immersed in a part of culture unfamiliar to him. The intricacies of American sports are puzzling to Toji, you realize. While you wave excitedly to the fans who are tailgating and grilling food and playing cornhole, he looks on in disbelief. When you explain the concept of tailgating to him, his expression deepens even more. He doesn’t like the hecklers that litter right outside the entrance and try to sell nosebleed tickets twelve times the market price. He thinks porta-pottys are foul as he takes in the long line of people who wait along the side of the large parking lot. You can tell he’s a little overwhelmed, and aggravated by the new things he learns. But he doesn’t complain, content to listen to the three of you as he watches his surroundings.
Despite the array of emotions that engulf him, he keeps you by his side without a second thought. The closer you get to the stadium, the thicker the crowd gets. When you make it through security and begin the long journey up the stone circular walkway of the stadium, Toji wraps a muscular arm around you and rests his hand on your hip in a grip that conveys a protective strength that shoots fluctuating reactions through you.
At first, you think he just wants his hands on you, and you’re prepared to smack his touch away. But then your perception shifts; a random man bumps into you with a sharp elbow into your arm and he turns around with an angry expression ready to yell. The glare that Toji levels at him leaves the man sputtering and apologizing before he slinks back into the crowd.
Normally, you don’t thrive off blatant displays of masculinity, but the sight of the man running away from Toji’s imposing stare makes your stomach fill with a deep-seated lust that surprises you. Like you’re a cavewoman, watching her caveman beat at his chest when another caveman gets too close to you. Toji grumbles to himself about the sheer number of people, his voice tinged with frustration even though his reassuring touch is gentle as he guides you through the throng of people toward your seats.
Thankfully, they aren’t nosebleeds, and they give you a good view of the field, with players already warming up. There is a large group of kids who hang off the rails, squealing in delight as their favorite players come and say hello and sign their jerseys and footballs. The speakers boom with music and commercial ads, the warm air carries the smell of popcorn up your nose, and your blood pumps in excitement.
It has been a while since you attended a football game, distant memories of sitting on your father’s shoulders as you both cheered in the stands. Since his death, you haven’t had the drive nor the time to attend another. So, to be in this position again with a man you are still trying to understand, it’s odd. But it’s not unwelcome and you’re going to enjoy every minute of it. When you watch football at home with your family, you’re a different person. You are loud and unashamed to express your feelings when you watch the games unfold. You stand up and sneer and bark at the officiant who can’t even hear you. You argue with your family about plays and players who will never know you. You love every emotion that the game brings out in you, and you’re unashamed to hide it. Toji is going to see a side of you that will either push him away or make him slink closer for more.
So, when the game begins with the kickoff, you join in the collective screams of the crowd, waving a towel in the air adorned with the yellow and black of your favorite team that is playing.
To your surprise once more, Toji did his homework. He effortlessly explains the rules as you both watch the first quarter together, looking to you for approval to make sure he’s correct. His attentive nature transforms into active participation as he cheers alongside you, his voice deep and booming compared to your screeching.
In the second quarter, there’s an injury on the field and the clash of pads ceases for long enough that fans leave their seats for food and to stretch their legs. Shiu and Rene disappear to get themselves a drink and it’s just you and Toji in the middle of empty seats.
“You’re a screamer,” he teases, his voice low and appreciative as he leans on his thigh with a cheek resting on his fist. His hair flows in the warm air before settling on pale cheeks.
“Too loud for you?” you retort, even if mildly curious about what he thinks of this side of yourself.
Toji purses his lips as he regards you with relaxed eyes. “It didn’t take me long to realize you’re not a dainty little thing. And besides,” A smile stretches across his face, white teeth glinting with a sinister disposition before his lips load with a remark you know will be salacious. “I like my women loud.”
You can be loud if he wants you to be. Preferably in another place besides your car where he can thrust like a man mad between your legs and dig those gleaming white teeth into the skin of your neck—
Oh.
For fuck’s sake.
Your blood simmers in your veins at the suggestion in his words. His eyes watch your throat when you swallow a thick pool of spit and that smile grows impossibly larger, a Cheshire cat looking at you with nasty intent. He’s too aware of the effect he has on women, and you have to look away from him to resist succumbing to the seductive charm that he wields naturally.
You steer the conversation back into your hands. “You were so curious about me when we first met but I don’t know much about you. Are you here in America for a reason? What do you do for work?”
In your own line of work, observation is key; every subtle cue from your patients holds significance, revealing layers of truths that they usually try to conceal. So, when you notice the tension in Toji’s jaw at your question, the way his features contort subtly, it’s a detail you slot into a drawer of curiosity that takes part of the file cabinet of Toji in your mind.
“I’m a private investigator,” he confesses harshly, catching you off guard. It’s a revelation you don’t anticipate. His imposing features give you the impression of a firefighter or maybe even a cop. Not someone watching others in his car, bugging houses and apartments, and gathering evidence. A PI? You open that drawer of curiosity again and slot away this information as well. He shrugs away the awkwardness that your silence brings, nonchalant and dismissive, avoiding your gaze. “It pays the bills. The hours suck sometimes but…the work is easy.”
“So…naturally I can’t really ask about the things you do?” you don’t hide the inquisitiveness that coats your words.
“It’s nothing glamorous enough to talk about.” And that’s all he offers you in response.
You have a myriad of questions swirling in your mind, each vying for attention from a man who is as tight-lipped as you. How did he even get into this kind of work? Who are his clients? Cheaters, embezzlers…or criminals?
That and so much more brew in your mind, tumbling over the other but ultimately dissipating when you sense his reluctance, evident from his still-averted gaze and tense shoulders.
“What about family? You asked me about mine, but I never got to hear about yours.”
Granted, you only told him about the members of your family who danced in your backyard when you both were wrapped in one another two weeks ago. He doesn’t know about the more intimate parts of your family life. He doesn’t know about your father’s death, or the estrangement of your stepfamily. But that can come later. Toji hasn’t given you enough of himself.
Toji’s features now morph into disdain, souring the air between you. The bright emerald of his eyes dims with a grayish overcast, the liquid of the irises hardening like cooling lava.
His response is terse, laced with palpable displeasure that intensifies the acrid taste in the air. “There isn’t much to tell. I don’t get along with them, and they do their best to not get along with me either.” The timbre of his voice is lower, menacing enough to let you know it’s a subject he won’t entertain. At least for right now.
You open your mouth to speak again, to maybe apologize for making him uncomfortable, to reassure him that you wouldn’t judge him over something like this. He shifts in his seat, clasps his hands together and absentmindedly picks at a callous on the side of his thumb. The pink flush on his cheeks is not one of bashfulness, but of frustration and embarrassment. From the sliver of his eyes you can see, there is something simmering beneath the surface that might take you a while to unveil.
“I do have a son, though.” The sentence shoots into the air and down your spine with a chilling clarity, breaking the flow of your thoughts as you blink in astonishment.
Pardon???
Considering he’s a grown man a few years older than you, it’s understandable. But the notion of him being a father never crossed your mind. The concept of children isn’t foreign to you; you see and take care of them every day. It’s the concept of children coming from him that’s a new development you have to consider.
While you believe you can handle a relationship with a single father, you’re upset at being told now, rather than before.
“You were with me all day two weeks ago and you never took the time to mention you have a son?”
You don’t hide your irritation. Once your trust is lost, it’s almost impossible to regain. Why would you give away sacred pieces of yourself to a man you wouldn’t trust to hold those pieces with care?
Despite your frustration, you rationalize.
Maybe Toji was nervous to bring it up? Some people may like to ease into such topics. This relationship, or whatever this is, is brand new and smooth. There haven’t been any cracks caused by arguments or behavior that is damaging.
But this isn’t about having a job that he’s not proud of or admitting that he is not financially responsible. This is about an entire child, a facet of his life that he cannot hide away. How long would he have waited to tell you if the topic of family hadn’t come up so soon? Would he have told you? Would he hide his son away and push him off to a babysitter on date nights so you are never aware? Would he sleep over at your house, so you can’t see the room that’s decorated for a child or the toys scattered about the floor?
As you wrestle with the growing anxiety that crawls across your skin, Toji fumbles for something in his pocket, his face a satisfying beet red as you watch him hand you his open phone. Bright from the illumination of the screen, you take in a picture of a young boy who bears a striking resemblance to Toji. His raven locks spiky and disheveled, his green eyes sharp and ethereal, and he wears a bored and calm expression just like his father. The chubbiness of his cheeks and innocence in his eyes tug at something in your chest; he can’t be any older than six years old. The sight of the boy makes you think of the many kids you take care of every day, and some of the frustration subsides within you.
“His name is Megumi,” he informs you, shy despite his rough exterior. He picks at the callous on the side of his thumb again, and one of his legs begins to shake in place.
The frustration dies down more. It’s a beautiful name, and as you look at the picture, a small smile tugs at your lips. You wonder what kind of a boy he is.
“Fuck listen—just I-I’m shit at this.”
You look up at him and take in the apprehension on his face. His lips are downturned in a gentle frown, the scar on the side of his face warped along with the muscles of his mouth. There’s a sense of shame in his gaze, and it somehow makes you feel relieved to know that he can feel just how upset you are.
“I don’t date women…I fuck them and stay around until they want me gone.” He doesn’t bother to sugarcoat his words. They shoot out of his mouth, piercing your skin with their directness. It’s a little painful, and you struggle to absorb his blatant honesty, feeling flashes of anger and indignation fill your chest as your lips part, ready to respond with directness of your own. “But you’re the first woman in a long fucking time that’s made me want more. So just…” he trails off, stuttering over what to say before ultimately growling low in his throat into silence.
You hesitate, lips flinching and syllables of fury dissipating in the small space between your top and bottom lip. “You gonna let me meet him?” you snap because you’re still mildly irritated as you give him his phone and pinch the muscle of his bicep with a harshness that reflects your fading anger and your desire to see him squirm for his actions.
He swats your hand away as if you’re a pest, moving his arm from you with a sneer that holds no malice. “No let me just lock him in my closet every time I want to see you—of course, I’ll fucking let you meet him.”
You throw him a withering glare, ignoring his sarcasm, and the smirk that slides onto his lips only makes you want to either smack or kiss him. The fact that you can’t decide on which only annoys you more.
*** Toji ***
“Gimme two hot dogs and a pretzel,” Toji mutters to the concession stand attendant. It’s halftime, and the walkways behind the stands are crowded with fans hurrying to go to the bathroom, or for more food and alcohol. You stand close to him, a welcome warmth that he wants more of but refuses to ask for on the off chance you deny him. He doesn’t feel like pouting for the rest of the day.
“And what’ll it be for the lady?” the attendant asks with a level of humor that is off-putting, a smile on his face that Toji knows you itch to smack off.
“It is for the lady,” you correct, a hint of condescension falling from plush lips that you still won’t let him taste. The attendant sputters, his face red as a tomato as he takes the rest of Toji’s order, doing his best to ignore the deadly glare you shoot him as he counts Toji’s money. A snort rattles from Toji’s chest as he watches you. He’s known from the beginning that you’re fiery, but seeing it firsthand fascinates and arouses him at the same time.
This environment is different for him, odd in every way, and a foreign ground that he’s unsteady on. The celebratory atmosphere reminds him of the loud laughter and fireworks from festivals that he could hear outside the Zenin compound throughout the year. He thinks of the Tanabata festivals he never got to experience or the years of Hanami that he was forbidden to enjoy. He could only take a small bit of pleasure in cherry blossoms in the Zenin gardens, blooming and scattering their petals on the well-kept grass to mark the beginning of the season. As a child, he was never allowed much. He was seen as ‘inferior trash’ that was insignificant and unworthy to be looked at let alone talked to unless it was to yell or belittle. Naturally, his family didn’t want others to see where said trash came from if they could help it.
He can’t think about it right now—he won’t. The thought of his family brings a tight coil of pain and anger in his chest, a coil he had used as fuel to cope with his dangerous decisions.
There’s so much more that he needs to focus on, like the fact that you’ve already taken a big bite out of one of your hot dogs. Half of it has disappeared from your hand, and there’s ketchup on the edge of your mouth as you chew. He notices the way you shift your hips from side to side in your seat, and the satisfied hum that escapes your throat. You’re satisfied, and while you eat with manners, you don’t hide your boisterous enjoyment, finishing one hot dog and moving on to the next, your pretzel wedged between the meat of your seductive thighs.
He’s been trying to be respectful all day ever since you denied him a kiss in the kitchen, but you’re tempting him. When you answered the door earlier in the afternoon, the hand that was in his pocket pinched the side of his thigh until the shameless thoughts could fade away.
You’ve graced his presence with shorts and a jersey, a yellow and black number that lays against your chocolate skin in a way that still seems to make you glow in the setting sun. No braids this time, your natural curls have fallen from your bun after screaming so much, framing your face and causing your gold hoops to wink at him. You didn’t wear makeup that night when he met you, so the sight of eyeliner on you today, and the way it accentuates the curve of your eye and the heaviness of your long lashes, it makes him shift in his seat.
He’s had to clench his jaw and bear the pain of his teeth grinding against each other to stop himself from ogling at the mouth-watering canvas of your legs. You’re all curves with dimples at the bottom of your thighs when you sit, and his gums ache to sink into the flesh so you can squeal and beg for him to touch you where you want it most. It’s been weeks since that night and he’s feigning for more. When you smile at him or shoot him a glare, it reminds him of that commanding aura you had in the backseat of your truck, and the back of his neck prickles with sweat.
While the thought of you skinning him alive if he decides to be a Neanderthal turns him on, he wants to be civil. In your kitchen earlier today, you allowed him to get close enough to feel the heat radiating from your skin, to catch the scent of coconut from your curls, tantalizing his senses until your firm ‘no’ sobered him up immediately. It was a stark reminder of who you are, and how little you tolerate.
He'll behave.
His eyes catch you guzzling down five heaping gulps of your beer, the foam coating your upper lip. You wipe it away with your finger, sucking the digit into your mouth, and popping it out completely oblivious to how sinful you look and Toji’s catapulted into that day when you sucked your own cum off his fingers.
He has to behave.
The vibration of his phone in his pocket sours his mood immediately, turning his gaze from your form as he digs into his pocket. It’s the third time it’s buzzed today, and he knows who it is. No matter how hard he tries to ignore it, he can only put off his job for so long.
Unknown: Good job on the assignment last week.
Unknown: Your pay should be in your account by tonight.
Unknown: There’s another contract for you if you’re interested. Message me back and I’ll send you details.
“Everything okay?” Your voice pulls him from his phone, and he meets your curious gaze, one of your elegant eyebrows lifting in question as you assess him. “Something with work?”
“Yea,” he replies and regrets it immediately.
Lie #1
It’s not a complete lie—it is work—but the details…
Toji takes a long swig of his beer, attempting to soothe the shame that washes over him.
You really are a screamer.
Toji sits back in his seat, watching you with a wicked smile as you unleash a torrent of colorful language that makes his cock twitch. Even though you roar with the crowd, your voice rises higher.
“That’s a fucking flag! I should come down there and officiate for you instead you stupid piece of shit!”
Your curls brush the skin of your cheeks that puff in your frustration, your arms folding across your chest as you cock your hip and growl beneath your breath. You’re easily the loudest one in this section of the stands. Rene revels in it, egging you on by rooting for the opposite team and giggling when you bark at her. Shiu is content to watch the display, a fresh toothpick in his mouth and an arm over Rene’s shoulders as he idly twirls a lock of hair at her nape. You’re all yelling and sputtering indignation as you watch the game unfold, your team losing by what Toji has learned is a touchdown.
He knew this side of you was there. He could tell in the weight of your gaze that night. It's a side of you that he did not expect to see so soon. He soaks it in. He takes in the way you cuss out the man three rows down who won’t stop glaring at you. He absorbs how high-pitched the screech of your voice makes his eardrums shake, and he revels in the smile that forms on your lips when your team scores the game-winning touchdown.
When there are lulls in the game, you tell him about your career. You’re a pulmonary pediatric fellow at a hospital here in town that’s only a year and a half from completing your fellowship. You smile when you talk about the kids you take care of and your associates at work. You’re proud of your research and of how far you’ve come.
All of it, every part of you that you show him, is comforting. Warm despite how cold you appear. It’s a comfort he didn’t imagine having…ever in his life—especially a dreary life like his. But he soaks up this—you—as much as he can.
When the game is over, you’re elated and giggling, tucked into his side as he guides you through the drunken crowd. The moon is high in the sky, and it bathes your skin and makes you stand out in the crowd. You look up at him, smiling softly with a buzzed gaze that’s two beers deep.
“Did you have fun? Not bad for your first American game?”
“You screamed the entire time,” he teases, chuckling at the way you gape up at him and then sneer before turning away. He throws his arm around your shoulders, using the touch as a safe territory to keep his hands to himself, and pulls you closer.
You demand cotton candy which he indulges in as well before you both part ways with Rene and Shiu. The journey back to your apartment is a quiet one. As Toji drives, the warm July air fills the car, mingling with the faint strains of classic rock playing on the radio. Toji watches with flickering glances as you hum along, your eyes closed and the breeze wafting through your curls loose around your shoulders.
Something inside of him rattles. Whatever it is, it’s long-forgotten and buried deep within him, surrounded by cobwebs and dust that have accumulated over time since that dark day years ago.
*** You ***
From the short journey of his car to inside of your apartment, you repeat to yourself that you have to take this slow, for your own peace of mind.
You keep the most intimate parts of yourself locked away and only those who are worthy of you have a copy of the key. But somehow, and in such a short time, Toji has stolen a copy for himself and slotted the key into the door. But thankfully, the door is caught against the wall, hinges rusted over and ungiving.
You have to know more about him before you let him in to look at those parts of you. If you jump the gun and give him more so soon and end up hurt, it will throw you into a depth of pain that you promised yourself to never touch again if you could help it.
“You have a good time?”
Toji’s voice breaks the silence, his arms folding tightly across his chest, betraying the restlessness in his hands. His messy black locks, tousled by the late July humidity, partially hide his emerald gaze, which flickers briefly to meet your own before darting away.
Your socked feet pad across the hardwood floor, closing the space between you, and your head slowly tilts to look at him. Despite his façade of composure, his scar curves against his lips in a slight twist, twitching as he tries not to frown. Thin eyebrows pitch down in frustration, and you catch the way his fingertips drum against the skin of his biceps. He’s fidgety—nervous. Is he upset with himself? Ashamed that he couldn’t take you out on a proper date with dinner and a movie like everyone else expects?
Hopefully, he will learn that you go against the grain of proper in so many ways.
“I had a great time,” you confess softly, noticing the subtle relaxation in his stance at your words. The thrumming of his fingers stop, the tension in his shoulder fades. “You wanted to take me out and I let you. That all you want from me?”
He’s such an expressive man.
His face twists, perturbed by your bluntness and the prospect of delving into emotional territory. “I told you already that I want more.”
His declaration sends a fluttering through your heart that is reminiscent of the feeling you had when he surprised you with a slice of yellow cake. It’s comforting, and you want to lean into it. But it’s not enough to overwhelm you. You’re still in your right mind and still aware of your expectations even though he captivates you.
You press your finger into the firmness of his chest, hard so that the muscle pillows around your digit. The gaze you shoot up at him is unyielding, serious, and menacing enough that he straightens his spine just a little.
“Listen to me, because I’m only going to say this one more time. I don’t do situationships. I don’t do friends with benefits or the occasional hookup. I’m not saying things need to be serious with us but…you need to show me that you mean it.”
As you speak, you assess Toji, who shows no signs of amusement or ignorance. His posture is rigid, his back ramrod straight, and his deep green gaze locked onto yours.
“That night we had was great. I won’t deny that but…I won’t compromise my expectations and I don’t tolerate bullshit. I’m not going to let you fuck me just because we did it before. You want more? I want you to try. Earn me.”
You relish in the way his eyes widen, contemplating your words and the severity beneath them before his face smooths back into its usual cool demeanor. He unfolds his arms from his chest, and you curse inwardly at the way you immediately watch his shirt stretch across defined pectorals.
“You know you’re a feisty little thing.”
Heat from the way he speaks and annoyance at his lack of attention flare within you like wildfire. You open your mouth to yell, to bark at him to be serious, but the sound of his laughter extinguishes that fire inside of you instantly.
He doesn’t offer an apology for his comment and you don’t need one. You know you’re feisty and steadfast. It’s the only way you can function around men to survive, to stay afloat and still have a grasp of who you are. And if Toji couldn’t handle it, you definitely wouldn’t have slept with him or entertained a date that you thoroughly enjoyed.
“I’ll try,” he finally offers, voice soft but filled with conviction. Normally the small remark would offend you, but surprisingly coming from Toji, it’s enough.
Observing his behavior today and a little bit two weeks ago, you note his acceptance of your quirks and individuality—at least the bits you allow him to see. He marveled at the amount of food you ate and joined alongside you. He let you babble to him about every single player on your favorite team and how many championships they had won. He let you display your strength in your voice and personality, didn’t try to control or overshadow you like so many other past experiences you’ve had before learning how to rule the men in your life.
He let you be yourself.
And that thought makes you finally open your mouth to give him something he had asked for earlier, something you had previously denied despite your own desires.
“You can have your kiss,” you offer with a shrug, feigning nonchalance even though your heart picks up in speed as the implication registers on his face. “So you better do it right.”
It’s an invitation that he snatches away from your imaginary hands and tears open with thick fingers, greedy and growling with finality.
His sharp gaze traces the contours of your body, unabashed in its appraisal, leering at the pieces of skin visible to him. You know he’s been looking at you all day, but his observation now is intense, heavy and without reservation and you’re fumbling from the sudden rush of longing that pumps hot through your veins.
Toji inches closer, your hands instinctively find their way to his chest, his towering presence overwhelming your small stature. His height ignites an evolutionary desire in you that makes your mouth water, makes your cunt pulse with need beckoning for him to fill the mold he left inside two weeks ago. You’re still not used to climbing up the summit of him, so the air is thin once more, pulling the oxygen from your lungs and stuttering in your chest when a large hand cups the side of your neck and tilts your face up to him like an offering.
When his lips slide against yours, your fingers in his shirt tighten. His touch singes the ends of your nerves, boils the blood in your veins that pump fast throughout your body. Your skin is burning, searing when muscular arms hoist you up and wrap your legs around his thick waist before your ass is sliding on the cold marble of your kitchen counter, your lips still sealed against his.
There’s so much of this that feels like that night at your uncle’s. So much and yet not enough.
He drowns you with his touch, digs his fingers into the plump flesh of your thighs before yanking you, hard and with unforgiving impatience, closer to his body. The fabric of your jeans rubs too harsh against your wet panties, digs against the sensitivity of your clit and you repress the insatiable yearning to roll your hips against his.
Toji’s large hands slide up your body, traversing the mesh of your jersey that hugs you before cupping each side of your face again to tilt you sharper in the way he wants. Blue raspberry from the cotton candy you both indulged in after the game coats his tongue that licks your bottom lip in a silent request for entrance, and you grant him access, surrendering a whimper into his mouth as his tongue slides sinfully against yours. Tastebuds kiss your own, slide against them with whispered promise of satisfaction if you just relax and melt further into him. Just a little.
But you can’t, god you can’t.
You’re losing control and you have to stay strong. You have to stay above the waters of logical thinking even though you’re sinking with every stroke of his tongue, with every sweet, hot breath into your mouth, with every inch of flesh that your fingers dig into his chest because you need more. More than a kiss, more than what he’s offering, and you know he can give it to you. Toji can pull you into the inferno he’s raging inside of your body until your clothes are scorched off and his skin is sliding against yours sweaty, sticky, and undulating with every roll of his hips.
But he doesn’t give you more. He doesn’t pull you further into that fire.
The intensity of his kiss dies down slowly, his lips pulling away from yours with a wet smack as you pant along with him. Toji kisses your lips once, then twice, nips your bottom lip to seal everything he’s given before smirking down at you. Too devilish and arrogant and you don’t have a working brain cell in your head right now to correct him. His hands that cradle your cheeks slide down to your upper arms, giving them a gentle squeeze before he speaks.
“You still gonna let me be nice to you?”
His words are an echo of that night, his own way of telling you that he’s here. That he wants more—that he wants to give you more. You just have to let him.
With your head still swimming and the pulsing between your legs refusing to calm, you want him to be more than nice right now. But remembering the boundaries you have set, you nod instead and sigh into him when he kisses you one last time, sweeping his blue raspberry-flavored tongue against yours before pulling away, acting as though it’s nothing, as though you’re not sweaty at the small of your back and trembling with desire.
“Lock the door for me,” he commands, words devoid of a questioning tone, but filled with a sense of security and protection that you lean into.
“O-okay,” you manage to breathe, your heart slowing back into sinus rhythm, only to jump again as he places one final kiss on your lips, then your nose. You frantically bat him away before you lose consciousness, because any more and you’ll drag him into your room and disregard everything you said five minutes ago.
You watch him saunter away, pull his keys from his pocket, and twirl them in his hand before winking. “I’ll text you.”
It sounds so ridiculous coming from his lips, from a grown man who looks as if he doesn’t even know what a cellphone is, let alone a text message.
But it still makes your heart jump all the same.
You can only nod in response because your throat is too dry and heavy in the back of your throat with each swallow you take. You follow him to the door and roll your eyes at his annoying smirk before he closes the door behind him, casting your apartment into silence.
Your fingers wobble as they turn the locks of your door into place. You’re lightheaded, brain flitting through salacious memories of what you both did weeks ago and what you could easily be doing now.
You throw your back against the door and sag to the floor with an annoyed sigh.
*** Toji ***
Unknown: There’s another contract for you if you’re interested. Message me back and I’ll send you details.
Toji: I’m interested. Send me what you have.
#toji fushiguro#toji fushiguro x reader#Toji Fushiguro x black reader#toji fushiguro x black fem reader#toji x you#toji fushiguro x y/n#jujutsu kaisen#jjk x reader#jjk x black reader#black fem reader#black reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#mysteria157#masterlist#anime x black reader#Toji Fushiguro fanfic#jjk fanfic#toji fushiguro smut#toji fushiguro fluff#toji zenin#fushiguro toji#jjk toji#toji fanfic#toji smut#toji x reader#toji jjk#jujutsu toji#soft toji#jjk au#In Too Deep
223 notes
·
View notes
Note
I absolutely adore your writing!
I wanted to request a Eddie Munson and plus size!Henderson!reader smut!
After dropping Dustin off after Hellfire one night Eddie finally meets Dustin’s sister who is essentially the female version of Eddie. He is smitten with her but doesn’t show it in fear it will mess up him and Dustin’s relationship. He makes excuses to come over to the house more often (which the reader notices). She teases him on purpose, short skirts, low cut shirts, little touches when they pass each other. She’s driving him crazy. One night Dustin invites him over for a movie night and to discuss the new campaign, when Eddie and the reader are the only ones left awake will the tension be to much? Will he finally crack?
eddie m. - your brother's rocker best friend
main masterlist
an: hiii!!! thank u sm for the request AND all the love i've gotten on my work 🖤🖤 i hope this does your request justice omg!! 😭 because i sure as hell really liked writing it idkidkidk eddie in this one is just so 😵💫😵💫 anyways pls feel free to send more requests, i appreciate all the love omg like i didnt know so many ppl would like my writing especially being new to writing on tumblr 🥹TYSM OMG PLS I HOPE EVERYONE ENJOYS THIS i love the feedback! also this is hardly proof read so. yeah :p
warnings: 18+ only, minors dni! minors are NOT welcomed. eddie x plus size!reader, eddie x henderson!reader. this is pure filth, pure smut, literally porn with a plot. p in v (unprotected) *this is fiction pls protect urself*, slight exhibitionism (if u squint), oral sex (f receiving), mirror sex kind of, pet names, dirty talk, spanking/slapping, eddie being eddie
wc: 8.5k
summary: you're dustin's older sister, and notice his best friend taking a particular liking to you.
when eddie first realized who dustin’s older sister was, he was mind fucked. when dustin told eddie about you, dustin made it a note to emphasize the fact that he and you were the same age, and had eddie been, as dustin put it, ‘normal student,’ he would’ve graduated the same year as his sister. but, eddie remembered who you were. very vividly, and when he met you again formally at dustin’s house about a year ago—let’s just say eddie was obsessed with everything that had to do with you. he listened to the music you blasted from your room once he got into his van, he remembered the movies you watched so he could watch them and know why you liked them so much, and he remembered the books you carried and the ones you would read in your living room on his way to dustin’s basement. he wanted to consume you in every way.
"i can't really stay long dustin, Wayne's been getting on my ass," eddie said as dustin dragged him to his front door.
"yeah yeah, whatever, come on i just got this new comic, you have to see it," he said eagerly and eddie just sighed, waiting for dustin's knocking to be heard. and it was.
"dustin i swear if you don't have your key i'm going to literally rip-" you yelled through the front door as you swung it open, not to see only dustin but the guy you went to school with who you knew as the local weed supplier.
"what are you doing with my brother?" you spit, ignoring the fact that eddie looked a little starstruck. he didn't even hear you because of how loud your outfit was, the way your body was tight against your little dress you had in, how your tits looked pressed together, the way your hand rested on your hip as you looked at him irritatedly.
"don't start," dustin said and pushed passed you, telling eddie to come on.
"uh, i'm eddie," he introduced and you smiled through your small laugh, opening the door.
"yeah, i know who you are," you said and he almost thought he felt a shiver down his spine. you knew him, you knew who he was. and now that he saw you in person, he realized he overestimated his will power to be a gentleman and not get hard just at the sight of you.
"go ahead, but you're not staying long. ten minutes." you said strictly and he nodded frantically, stepping inside and following dustin straight to the basement, his eyes looking back for yours as you shut the door and turned, giving him a smile.
he was fucked. that was the start of a year long obsession he tried so desperately to hide. and failed.
you noticed eddie and you had the same interests, you heard megadeth and soundgarden blast through his radio in his shitty van dropping dustin off late, and even in school you saw the patches of rock and metal bands you liked on his backpack, or the studs on his jean jacket. you liked his style and like him, you carried the punk rock edge to you with multiple facial piercings and your black clothing. you enjoyed your style, even in high school you managed to apply dark makeup and were only allowed on piercing, so you kept your lip one. you grew into your own as you got older, only having a liking for horror and sci-fi movies, metal, rock and goth music, and loving your dark dull aesthetic. and eddie liked it too, he actually couldn’t believe how sexy you made looking and dressing like a ‘freak.’
you also noticed these last few months eddie has been coming over a lot more frequently, sometimes at night, sometimes early in the morning to take dustin to school. you didn’t realize until he came over three days in a row, and noticed he would linger in the same room you were in while dustin was off doing his usual around the house, or he’d make comments about the movie you’d be watching and then leave. you never minded it of course, you liked talking to him, you actually felt seen around him and he made you feel like the two of you could relate a lot more than you think.
you also kind of liked to push how far you could go with his boundaries. you’ve had a small crush on him since he started coming around a year ago, you couldn’t help but feel a flutter when he’d greet you with a small hug, or a blush when he’d tell you he liked the outfit you had on. but as the months went on you noticed your words took effect on him too, and you relished in the fact that you knew you could make him squirm a bit.
he enjoyed it even though he knew what you were doing, even though he was going fucking insane. he refused to indulge in his fantasies, in dropping hints that he wanted you in every way possible, he refused to risk his own relationship with your brother. he tried for the entire year he and your brother were friends, to ignore the things you do involuntarily. he didn’t know if half the things you did were on purpose or not, but he had to choke down groans seeing you bend over in tight black dresses, he had to refrain from sneaking into your room just so he can see what it looks like. he hated that you did this to him, that you could be this damn sexy it’s like it was doomed from the beginning.
it was the night dustin had a few friends over for a small get together, one of them being eddie and the others being his usual friend group, mike, el, max, lucas, will and steve as well. steve was forced to go by dustin and eddie, eddie mainly begging because he didn’t want to be the only babysitter there.
you were wearing your usual lounging around outfit when you decided to change because you were heading out that night with a few friends, and you got into your usual all black outfit. only this time you had on black mini skirt on that barely covered your ass as you walked, so to help with coverage you chose black sheer, nearly see through, tights underneath that were slightly torn and ripped, and your top was a deep cut baby tee that was black with rhinestones on it. it was cute to you, you loved skimpy clothes as much as anyone else did and you loved the way it hugged onto your thick body.
you just finished your makeup when you decided to slip on your black heeled boots and go downstairs to gather your things. it was kind of like in the movies when the woman steps down the stairs in her ballgown, having her date gawk at her. only this time you had two little pieces of clothes dripped in all black, and eddie was the one gawking at you while everyone paid attention to the game they were playing.
“i can’t believe i’m here. where the fuck is robin and nance?” steve huffed as he slumped in his seat, eating his pizza.
“you know you should be more grateful to spend time with us, asshole. we could all die tomorrow!” dustin exclaimed from his seat, and steve just rolled his eyes.
“how about in right now?” he mumbled.
eddie wasn’t too focused on anything except the music coming from upstairs, is that the cranberries?, he asked himself, trying to crane his neck as if it’d make him hear better. it wasn’t long before he heard your door open and your hard footsteps treading down the stairs. he felt his heartbeat pick up and the minute you fell into his peripheral he had to turn to look at you. big fucking mistake.
the minute he saw your curvy figure in your tight clothing that just made everything more prominent, he felt that rush. not adrenaline rush, he felt his blood fall from his cheeks and straight into his cock. he was beyond embarrassed, lucky for him he was holding a pillow next to him and quickly moved it over his front. something you saw very briefly, wondering why he looked pained almost.
“alright, i’m leaving dustin, don’t fuck the house up or i will kill everyone here and get away with it,” you said emotionless, going to grab your purse and keys on the kitchen counter.
“don’t get pregnant!” dustin shouted from the living room and you walked back in to say goodbye to your little brother and his friends.
“yeah yeah you too, bye, love you,” you said and leaned down to leave a kiss on his forehead, something eddie paid way too close attention to. he could see down your shirt from his seat, and he could only feel his pants grow tighter around his waist. he wanted to stuff his face in your chest, to hold you by your wide waist and pull you to his body. he wanted to defile you more than you’d ever been.
“problem eddie?” you asked, snapping your fingers where you stand behind dustin, sending everyone’s eyes to his direction.
“uh, wha- I, no, yeah i like this game too,” he stuttered and mostly everyone tried to stifle their laugh while dustin questioned him.
“okay?” you said in a confused laugh, walking off around the group to pass by eddie and bringing your hand to ruffle through his brown locks, and to his shoulder to squeeze slightly.
“see ya later, weirdo,” you said and left, leaving eddie rock hard, embarrassed and in complete shock. he needed your touch everywhere, and that same night after he finally got home and laid in bed, he jerked off to the images he internally burned in his mind.
remembering that night gave you ideas for every time you saw him after that. wearing the skimpiest clothes to open the door when eddie walked dustin to the door, making sure that when he was there at your house you were wearing the thinnest tank top with no bra, and checking that the thermostat was set at a cool 69 degrees.
it was like hell. if he were in heaven. he was tortured seeing you, but the more he saw you the more he craved you. he was excited to see you now, to see what you would have one the next time as you offered a drink in a sultry voice, bending over extra low to reach a fake cord from behind the tv while he sat on the couch. he felt like he was going to fall into a deep black hole that would open up every time you were around, he could follow you around like a puppy if you wanted.
he made excuses to see you, he embarrassed himself in moments just so he could see you, or hear your voice. he was genuinely obsessed with you, that even seeing you for five seconds could make his entire day complete. he was desperate, and you knew.
“you, eddie munson, looking for homework?” you scoffed, crossing your arms over your chest to cover yourself. you felt exposed, just waking up from a nap after dropping dustin off early in the morning, wearing nothing but black shorts and a small tank top that was a little see through if you stared hard enough.
“uh, yeah it’s like this paper i had to write, for…” he trailed as his eyes unknowingly moved to glance over you. he couldn’t help but look at how the shorts hugged your thighs and hips. please let suffocate me. his thoughts were impure, not gentleman like. he should be ashamed.
“for…?” you asked, waving your hand in front of him to get his attention back.
“-my class, it’s in a few minutes,” he said checking his watch on his wrist.
“you do know dustin isn’t here right? and the backpack in question is… with him… at school,” you said in an obvious tone, making him reach to the back of his neck and cringe at himself.
“yeah, right…. um, bye,” he said quickly and left, cursing at himself under his breath as he tried to refrain from thinking of the way you looked before he grew hard. you didn’t shut the door until he drove off, almost smiling to yourself that he did that, made that silly excuse to just talk to you for two minutes.
it was little things that he did that drove you equally as crazy, and the fact that he did everything he could just to see your face made you want him even more. it made you wonder why he hadn’t tried anything with you yet. you assumed he felt like you did, so you didn’t question if he found you attractive or sexy, you just wondered what was holding him back from taking the next step.
«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»
eddie found himself a bit stuck in his own thoughts as dustin, mike, will, gareth, jeff and lucas discuss plans of their next campaign. he wanted to focus on the words and suggestions coming out of dustin’s mouth, he wanted to shout desperately when gareth recommended something that would put the entire campaign in jeopardy, but nothing could come from him.
dustin invited everyone over to spend the night while they plan their new campaign for d&d, he knew it could take all night even the day after to create something flawless, so he figured it’d be best to have those who can sleep over. you were a bit bothered by having that much testosterone in the house, but a little won over by the fact that eddie would be spending the night as well.
you catered for the group of course. After you got home from work around seven or eight at night, you bought pizza and drinks for the kids and acted as their mother, fixing their sleeping arrangements and making sure everyone had pillows and blankets before bed. the minute you walked into your home with the pizza and drinks, everyone zoomed to the kitchen except eddie. he shyly walked over to you with his black jeans on and muscle shirt under his jean jacket.
“i can get that for you,” he offered, nodding to the pizza boxes and liters in both hands.
“here, you can take the drinks,” you smiled and handed him the bag of drinks, letting your fingers linger a little on his while transferring the bag to him. he could feel the softness of your touch, how you grazed the outside of his hand with your nails and smoothly removing your hand from the bag.
“thank you,” you said and lightly patted his chest, moving past him closely so that your body touches his.
stop it eddie. stop! he screamed at himself as you started to tell the kids to not make a mess, trying to keep himself from getting hard again and finally going to put the sodas on the counter where you placed the pizza.
“eddie?” you said and walked over to him where he holds a paper plate in his hand, his eyes wide and doe like as he turned to you immediately.
“yeah? whats up?” he said quickly, gripping his plate.
“you think you can help me make everyone’s bed? i can’t reach the sheets in the closet,” you said innocently, batting your eyelashes and flashing a smile.
“y-yeah, of course.” he obliged and put the plate down, following you upstairs to the closet in the hall. you made sure to go first, your pencil skirt hugging your ass and thighs perfectly, putting him in a trance he never wanted to get out of.
“it’s right over here,” you said and turned right, stopping at white double doors. you opened the doors and reached to turn on the light, letting yourself be as exaggerated as possible, and leaning back to let him through. you turned to the side as he walked up to the closet, staying there and watching him as he strained his body upwards, his shirt lifting a bit to show his pale skin littered with tattoos, even seeing his slight v-line, something you wanted to explore. you didn’t try to hide the fact that you were checking him out.
you decided to test him again, so you scooted your body closer to his and leaned across, your breasts and your body touching his as you reached for a pillow that was on a lower shelf. your hand skimmed his skin not so subtly, grabbing the pillow and squeezing it to your stomach to make your tits more prominent in your hardly buttoned button up.
eddie’s skin was on fire, if he wasn’t thinking about d&d before you came home, he definitely wasn’t thinking about it now. he gathered all of the sheets and some pillows, pulling them out and going back to his relaxed position as you stared up at him with a devilish smile.
“what do you think you’re doing?” he asked in a serious tone, taking notice of your breasts pushed together and again, you saw it on his face. that restraint, the self control he tried to muster up.
“what do you mean, eds?” you tried to play naive, like you were unaware of this little game the two of you had partaken in. it was cat and mouse except less action. you liked to tease and taunt, and he held himself tight with a piece of string that was held by the relationship he had with dustin. who would he be if he actually made a move on one of his best friend’s sister?
“i can’t do that to dustin. i can’t.” he said to you, not even acknowledging your fake unawareness.
“i don’t know what you’re talking about.” you said seriously and turned towards the stairs, “you comin’?” you asked sweetly, yet still a mischievous smile on your face. you were testing how far you could go without breaking that string, but now you wanted to break it. you wanted him to fall apart for you, to finally admit he’s wanted you this whole time.
eventually after everyone settled in, the group went down into the basement and began to watch a movie as the night went on. you told everyone you’ll be in your room, changing into something more comfortable to accompany your brother and his friends.
“it’s just supposed to be us,” dustin huffed and you rolled your eyes, accepting the fact you were unwelcomed and you changed anyway, going into the living room to watch a movie by yourself.
«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»
the boys settled in the basement around 11 at night after arguing about their storyline, going to sleep with no successful campaign just yet but successfully watching two movies before everyone knocked out. eddie was no help obviously, too deep in thought about the way your hands felt, how your warm body pressed into his side, what exactly you were hiding under that pencil skirt. he didn’t realize how sexy you made office attire look, suddenly imagining himself bending you over your office desk and railing you to the point all of your papers and knick knacks fell over. it’s all he thought about as the boys talked over the movie, wondering what it would be like to just go upstairs and take you on the couch.
he rubbed his hand over his face with a deep breath, sighing and throwing over the blankets he had on himself on his other side, getting up from the small couch you had in your basement. eddie knew where everything was in the house, and he made his way to the kitchen for some kind of beverage. a beer, if he was lucky.
he was lucky, just not with the beer. once he got into the threshold of the kitchen, he saw the dim light from underneath the cabinet that’s above the counter glowing against you. your back was to him, seemingly eating something, yet he just stared at your figure. from here, the view of your ass was almost problematic. your tight shorts didn’t let much hide from his sight, he could see the crease of your asscheeks peeking out of the fabric, and he saw the small of your back due to your tank top rising up and nearly above your midriff.
“couldn’t sleep?” eddie asked you finally as he came to lean on the counter across from where you stood.
“i was just craving something sweet, you?” you asked, turning around unphased since you already felt him staring at you. you looked at him as you licked your spoon clean and he breathed in deep.
“something like that,” he said and stood up straight, walking around to you and now standing in front of you, leaning his body against the counter to mimic your stance.
“dustin’s my friend, you know that, and you're like, wow you know? it's hard to, control myself,” he slightly admits, beginning to watch as you sensually lick ice cream from your spoon again after you dipped into the pint for another scoop.
“mhm,” you hummed in agreement, eyes never leaving his. you weren't phased by his confession, you already knew. he tried to not show how in love he was with you, but failed miserable every time.
“i can’t do anything to ruin that, he’d hate me forever,” eddie said slowly, too enchanted by the way your tongue glides over the spoon.
“i don’t know what you mean, eddie,” still keeping up with your shenanigans, wondering if he’d snap any time soon.
“really? the short skirts, showing your cleavage, walking around here with no bra when i’m around, like you want me to die really,” he said dramatically, his hands waving in the air and you smiled, putting the ice cream down.
“that’s just how i dress, eddie. plus this is my house, i can wear whatever i want,” you gleamed and he huffed.
“i won’t lie though, some things i do wear for you. like this, i know you like black. and i know you like when i don’t wear a bra, i see you staring at them all of the time,” you said stepping closer to him as his fingers grip the edge of the counter. he was silent, he couldn't talk. embarrassed at the fact that you actually noticed his not so obvious yet obvious stares.
“do you wanna feel them eddie? or do you just want to stare from a distance and jerk off in the bathroom when i leave?” his face turned a bright red, remembering the times he’d have to leave early or go to your bathroom to deal with what you caused.
“yes,” he answered without thinking, stepping towards you so that there is only a small gap between the two of you. your head turns upwards to look at him as he looks down between the two of you, watching your chest rise and fall with every breath.
“do you want me to-” you began but eddie shook his head quickly.
“shut up,” he demanded, pressing his lips into yours firmly. but it wasn’t like you expected.
normally when you made out with guys, it was boring and dull. there was no excitement, no crave, no desire, it felt like nothing to you. but feeling eddie’s lips on yours practically made your knees buckle, so soft and gentle yet still needy, begging for more. you feel his tongue slide against your lips and you part them slightly, letting him invade your mouth as your tongue fought with his. heavy breathing, panting, soft moans coming from you and occasional groans from eddie as his hands rested at your waist, just to inch upwards on your skin and up your shirt.
he pulled away breathlessly, leaving you flushed and aching for me as his eyes trained on your midsection, watching the piece of fabric lift with every inch he went up.
“you, you are so fucking dangerous,” he said roughly, his black fingernails skimming against the curves of your body, his hands rubbing on your rolls, pressing them into your back to pull you closer.
you could tell his touch was so needy, so eager to feel all of you all at once.
“what makes me dangerous? is it my incredibly intimidating face?” you smiled, watching his eyes grow dark with every touch on your body.
“mm, no baby, you have a pretty face.” he said, more confident than ever now that he knows this little game of yours was over. baby. the pet name sending a shock of pleasure straight to your core that you has to press your thighs together. he noticed.
his hands move to your midsection again, finally deciding to raise the tank top up off of your body. this was risky, you knew that. you were exposed in the very public kitchen that anyone could walk in at any moment, pressed against the counter now with eddie teasing his way around your large breasts.
“holy fucking shit.” he breathed as he cupped them in his hands, massaging and feeling over every inch of skin. he bounced them in his hands, pushed them together to see them fall to their natural state, and immediately brought his lips to the curve of your breast and slowly towards your hardened nipple. he wanted to savor all of you, to feel you and memorize what you liked and what you looked like under all these clothes.
“eddie?” you whispered as he stuffed his face in between your tits as he pushed them up, making you smile boyishly.
“mmmhm?” he hummed, shaking his head in your chest and you tug his hair up, sending a jolt to eddie’s crotch and making him wince.
“do you want me?” you asked, looking at his face in the dull light, wanting to bask in his gaze. you loved the slight stubble on his jaw, how his nose was lightly peppered with small freckles, the way his lips looked so pink and swollen—it drove you crazy.
“fuuuck yes, yes i want you, are you crazy?!” he whisper-shouted, making you blush and pull your lip in between your teeth.
“show me,” you teased, moving your hand from gripping his hair and on his shoulder. he was so quick with grabbing your wrists and practically pulling you upstairs into your bedroom, shutting the door by pressing you up against it. it was so quick, you didn’t even feel shame in the fact that you only had your bottoms on going up your stairs.
“i would’ve loved to fuck you over that kitchen counter, but i’d rather not have dustin and our friends see me sinning with his older sister,” he said as he dipped his head into the crook of your neck and leaving small kitten licks and kisses on your skin.
“thank you,” you breathed, holding him tight to your body.
you did feel a bit bad about engaging with eddie like this, you knew it was a bad mistake as dustin’s sister. this was his best friend, and here you are in your bedroom with your tank top down stairs, feeling the way he’s pressed up against you.
“mm, don’t thank me yet, sweetheart,” he grinned into your collarbone.
“since i can’t fuck you over the counter, i think we’ll just have to settle for that little vanity you got,” his voice was so dark, so deep that you didn’t even really recognize who it was. it made you drip into your panties, and immediately you let out a tiny whine.
eddie moved you to the white, pristine vanity you had where you sat and did your makeup everyday. it wasn’t much, but it did come with a mirror and the thought of watching eddie fuck you from the back like that became too intense for you.
you instinctively bent over still in your short shorts, watching eddie behind you as he softly throws his head back and releases a long ‘fuuuuck’ as you swayed your hips gently against his crotch. he rubbed over the globes of your ass, teasing his fingers at the hem of your shorts.
“i can’t believe you’re bent over like this for me,” he says as he removed his black shirt and stepped out of his sleep pants, only leaving the fabric of his boxers strained against his hard on. you felt it in the kitchen, and you feel it even more now pressing against your ass. you whimpered a little, trying to rub against him until he gripped your meaty hips and stilled your movements.
“you gotta be good for me, okay baby? let me take my time,” he cooed, rubbing over the wideness of your hips and ass as he met your eyes in the mirror. he lingered his fingers around your waist band and slowly tugged your shorts down, leaving you completely bare, and leaving eddie feeling like he could cum just from the fabric of his boxers rubbing against his tip.
“no fucking panties?” he questioned, standing back up as he stared at your bare ass, moving your cheeks to spread and reveal both your holes.
“i, i forgot,” you lied, looking at his body through the mirror. the only light that’s shining on the both of you is the orange hue from the street lights in your neighborhood, the shadow of your window blinds casting on eddie right now. you liked the way his pale body looked under that glow, the way his patch work tattoos mixed together well, some looked lighter than others and the bigger ones were more complex. you wanted to inspect each and every one, know the meaning of them, why he got them.
“i know you didn’t forget, baby. you don’t have to lie to me,” he said and got on his knees to become face to face with your bare pussy. even though you were a little insecure about the way you looked down there, you tried to be as confident as ever just in case it wasn’t what a man was attracted to. you’ve met men who preferred skinny women, or men who didn’t like the way you looked down there because you were ‘too big.’
eddie’s hands gripped your ass and thighs firmly, spreading them as he pleased and watching the way your lips spread to reveal your wetness leaking out of you.
“fuck, fuck im so,” he tried to say but he was losing it. he was going feral at the thought of you being this wet and dripping for him, losing it at the fact he had you bent over naked for him, whimpering and moaning for him.
“is, is it too much?” you cringed inwardly at yourself, shutting your eyes and resting your face on your hands that are folded on the vanity.
“what? no what? too much, what do you mean?” he said, standing up and looking at you through the mirror, still gripping your ass.
“like, am i too, um, fat?” you asked. you knew how ridiculous you sounded, how insecure you sounded. but it truly wasn’t like that for you, you were worried more so about the fact that eddie wouldn’t be big enough to pleasure you. you weren’t much of a size person, but if you wanted to ride someone it would be a bit hard to do that with someone who was 5 inches, for you at least.
“what the fuck? absolutely fucking not, oh my god, baby you are so fucking sexy. i’m literally drooling over this pussy, please i need to ruin you,” he begged, slapping your ass a bit and kissing over the sting. his kisses led him to your inner thigh, and moved his lips to kiss over your wet pussy lips that were pushed together by your thick thighs, and you sucked in a breath as you felt his tongue slide up to collect your slickness, and moving in between your lips.
“eddieee, fuck eddie what are you doing,” you asked as he moved his hand to use his middle and ring finger to rub gently over your cunt, spreading your pussy lips and letting his tongue find your clit swiftly, sucking and slurping as you spread your legs a little more.
“i’m eating this pretty pussy,” he mumbled against your cunt, going back to wrapping his lips around your clit as he licked and sucked, sending you to bite your arm to shush yourself. you saw the way he gripped your ass with his other hand, felt how he kept slapping at your skin, spreading one cheek as his other hand was finding your hole with his fingers.
“fuck, fuck eddie please, please make me cum,” you begged, squirming and moving your legs as you tried to grip the table itself to keep from thrashing. it was so overbearing, the fact that he was so handsome and sexy, and he was buried in your cunt.
“mmmm, baby,” he hummed against your folds, making you jolt and cry a bit. he removed his lips with a pop, letting his tongue lick up your juices on his lips, and watching as his fingers sank into your tight hole. his mouth practically fell open as he watched you stretch around his digits, and watching your eyes through the mirror roll back and your mouth open.
“that feel good baby? am i making you feel good?” he asked against your thigh, pumping his two fingers in and out of you as your breathing started to pick up, your back arching against the table.
“fuck baby, yes yes it feels so good, please don’t stop don’t fucking stop eddie,” you begged, reaching your arm back to grab at his head and pull him back to your cunt, making eddie even more excited at your neediness. he didn’t even realize how turned on his was until he found himself palming his cock through his boxers as you kept his head in place with your hand and rutted against his tongue and fingers. it was hands down the sexiest thing he’d ever felt, letting you use him to get yourself off and grind into his face, he was so desperate for you he found himself moaning into your cunt.
he was going crazy, and it wasn’t until he finally grabbed your hand and moved it so he could use the hand he was palming his cock with to spread your ass, and move his tongue from your clit to your asshole. he used your juices he collected with his tongue and spit directly on your hole, still letting his fingers pump in and out of your hole, but letting his tongue find his way between your cheeks.
“oh my god, oh my f- eddie, please don’t stop please fuck, i need it, i need you please,” it was your begging that made him feel drunk, the sound of you so desperate and so willing to do anything just so you can feel good, his mind was focused on you and only you. he actually forgot where he was for a moment, and let himself eat your holes out as he pleases.
“eddie, fuck i swear i’m gonna cum, please can i please cum?” he didn’t even tell you that you had to beg for your release, he didn’t even expect that you wanted permission, and now that he knows he doesn't want to give it to you just yet. he was loving the way you looked right now, how fucked out and desperate you looked, how sex just dripped from your pleadings.
“not yet pretty girl,” he said, his face covered in your juices and still, he wanted more. he moved his tongue back down to your hole where he decided to slowly add a third finger, letting his tongue trace around the way your cunt gripped his fingers.
“s’ too much, eddie please let me cum,” you felt the tears sting your eyes, and you didn’t even realize you were crying until you finally moved your head from the table and to look in the mirror, seeing your puffy eyes and red face, the tears leaking from your eyes. all you could see was the way his arms and hands were gripping your backside, yet the obscene slurping and moaning made it too intense for you to keep watching him devour you. you felt how his head shook and moved in your cunt, how his lips and tongue worked so beautifully on your clit, you even felt how the tip of his nose rubbed against your slit. it was so much, so overwhelming, you felt like you couldn’t breathe.
“tell me it’s mine, tell me this pussy is mine,” he said, moving his lips to kiss over your thighs again. you felt the way his fingers curved into you, hitting your soft spot that made you want to explode. your eyes couldn’t keep open, you felt like you were going cross eyed with the way you felt. never have you felt like this from getting head before, never felt so excited and so wet, you’ve never felt so needy the way eddie made you feel.
“eddie, it’s all yours, fuck it always has been, this pussy’s yours, please,” you cried, making sure you were only loud enough for him to hear.
“mm, that’s all i wanted to hear baby, cum for me, cum on my face,” he said and moved his lips back to your cunt, his tongue working feverishly now on your clit, sucking, grazing his teeth against your nub, licking and even using the fingers that were inside of you to replace his tongue and let his fingers work your clit.
“i’m, fuuuck, fuck i’m cumming, i’m fu-” you moaned, letting your body go limp on the table as your legs shook, your release coating his tongue and face as he kept fucking your hole with his tongue. you were practically biting down on your hand, his tongue still going and sending you into a spiral.
“baby, please, i can’t,” you gasped, begging him to halt. he finally releases you, the slurping and wet sounds no longer as he stood up and rubbed his hands over your ass while he pushed his erection into your wet cunt. he reached and grabbed you by your neck, pulling your naked body to his chest as he looks at your figure in the mirror. his left hand moves around your jiggly body, gripping at your tummy that bulges out slightly, squeezing everywhere and grabbing your cunt with his whole hand.
“this all mine, pretty baby? only for me?” he asked again in your ear, moving his hand to grip your tits and playing with your nipples.
“yes eddie fuck, please. make me yours? i wanna be yours,” you begged, your voice hoarse and weak, sounding completely different than your usual snarky tone. he couldn’t help but smirk to himself, having you like putty in his hands when the whole time you made him nervous.
his. yours. mine. the words eddie has craved to hear, he’s dreamed of cumming to you telling him you’re his. he’s wanted you for so long and here you are, all fucked out against his chest and still begging for more. he couldn’t help but move his boxers down to fall at his ankles, letting his cock spring free against your ass and quickly slipping it between your thighs, right against your pussy. through the mirror, you could see the tip of his cock peeking through your plush thighs, and watched as he fucked your thighs using the slickness from your cunt.
“fuck, this pussy’s so fucking wet for me, you want me to fuck you? maybe you’ll stop teasing me when i’m over here if i finally stretch you out, hm? what do you think?” he panted, enjoying the feeling of your thighs pressing against his cock, stopping before he could cum.
“please fuck me, i’ll be good, please,” you whined, moving your hand to feel the tip of his cock, feeling him buck his hips and hearing a low growl from his throat. he pulls you back with him, still pressed against his chest, even after you fall back on top of him when he decided to sit on your bed against the wall. now, he has your legs spread in the air with the back of your head pressed against his shoulder as he peers over your shoulder to watch you spread all for him. you can feel his hard cock against your asshole, seeing it over your cunt and moving your hips to coat his cock with your juices.
“uh-uhn, i’m not done,” he grumbled, keeping your legs spread and watching the way your pussy lips spread open with the way your legs were in the air, and how easy it was to access your clit and rub your wetness over your hole and clit.
he moved his hand to push his cock against your cunt, rubbing it between your fat lips making sure his tip hits right at the hood of your clit.
“can i suck it?” you asked shyly, you couldn’t help but moan at the size of it and seeing it rub against your pussy. “‘s so big,” you finished and he blushed, throwing his headback with a groan. he wanted to hear you ask him to suck him off over and over again, the way you sounded so small and shy about it, how you actually wanted to take him in your mouth. he'll definitely be thinking about that now.
“fuck, what i’d give to feel those lips right now, but not tonight baby. i need to be inside you, right fucking now,” he groaned and finally pushed his cock at your hole, feeling his tip intrude and slide in slowly. he wanted to try to get you used to the feeling of him stretching his way inside you, but slowly realized it was him who needed to get used to how tight your cunt sucked him in.
“oh my fuck, i could fuckin’ cum right now,” he groaned as he relaxed inside you, adjusting you on top of him so he could see better and you were better pressed against his chest. he could see everything from the way he’s looking down behind you, he could see your eyes fighting to stay open as he slid inside, and the way your legs squirmed trying to stay open.
“you’re doing so good for me, pretty girl, so good,” he praised, awakening something inside you. somehow, he made you want to do everything right to hear him tell you how good you’re doing for him.
“eddieeee,” you whined as you felt yourself sink onto all of him, watching your hips begin to move on his trying to fuck yourself on him.
“what baby? you need more?” he asked as he gripped your belly, loving the way it looked with your knees almost at your chest.
“harder, please,” you begged, throwing your head back to look up at him, just as he looked down at you with your eyebrows pinched and your mouth open. he smiles, kissing all over your face as he began to fuck up into you faster and harder, moving to watch your tits and tummy bounce with every thrust. he decided to take your legs and hold them open while still on top of him, slapping at your thighs and whispering dirty things in your ear. all you can muster out are occasional moans and cries, whining his name out.
“gotta be quiet sweetface, don’t need anyone hearing you moan my name for me like that, only me baby,” he groaned. you could feel the rumble of his chest against your back as you watch him slide in and out of you. you were cockdrunk at this point, so dumb and fucked out that you can’t form a coherent sentence.
eddie felt like he was losing himself in you, the way you squeezed your walls around him and cried out how big he was made him want to be more than inside you. he really wanted to crawl inside your skin and be with you twenty four seven, he wanted to be the piece of gum stuck at your shoe just so he’s near you. he was desperate for you in every way and it showed in each thrust.
“need you on your back, baby,” he grunted and slipped out of you, moving your body to be laying underneath him rather than on top of him. he moved your legs harshly, spreading them apart and slapping your pussy just to watch it recoil with every slap.
“such a pretty fucking pussy baby, can’t believe it’s all mine,” he said moreso to himself. he was rubbing up and down your thighs and belly with his cock rubbing against your entrance, watching you squirm and beg for him.
“i love your cock so fucking much, please fuck me,” you begged in a whisper, and he gripped your belly when he decided to finally slip back inside you, watching the way your tits were pressed together and nearly covering the bottom of your face.
“mm, fuck you’re so pretty like this,” he said as he brought his hand to your chin, his thumb rubbing over your lips as he slid inside you again, this time a little more rougher than last time. when he slid inside, you gave him the opportunity to slip his thumb in your mouth when you moaned softly, and you instantly wrapped your lips around his thumb and started sucking and licking on it like it was his cock.
he was in a trance watching you, and feeling your walls clench down on him at the same time. he couldn’t believe you wanted him like this, and how nasty you were for him, he kind of forgot about you being anyone’s sister.
you decided to bite down a bit on his thumb and watched as he winced, but felt the way his cock twitched inside of you. the pace he was going was harsh and rough, the sound of his balls slapping against your ass was something he didn’t even try to conceal. instead, his own groans and moans were getting a little louder, the both of your moans mixing together.
“eddie, it feels so good, fuck you’re so perfect,” you cried with his thumb still in your mouth and he leaned down, kissing your face and neck trying to reposition himself and angle differently. when he did, you could actually feel the air slip inside and the next thrust he hit, you and he both heard the sound of you queefing, immediately feeling embarrassed and wanting to cover your face.
“mmm, fuck she’s talkin’ to me baby,” he said in a smile while he kept pumping his cock in and out of you. you giggled and hit his chest, telling him to shut up and keep fucking you, trying to ignore the embarrassing noise your own vagina made.
“c’mon, she sounds so fucking good, so fucking wet for my cock, yeah?” he cooed, sending electricity down to your clit and making you arch your back. when you do, he takes the chance to catch your nipple in his mouth and nip and suck at it.
“fuck eddie, you’re filling me up so fucking good, s’full of you,” you tugged at his curls and kept his head on your chest, feeling the impeccable stretch of his large cock. it was so girthy, so long that you felt like you were being split in half. it was painful, and that made it even more pleasurable. the way the patch of hair above his cock was rubbing against your sensitive clit made you cry out, scratching and scarring his back as you heard his groans and moans become more visceral, harsher, and you felt the way his hips started to buck and stutter.
it was when he released your tit to meet your eyes, and wrapped his hand around your neck, gently squeezing—that’s when you immediately felt the tug in your tummy, your thighs and legs tensing as you watched the way he lost control inside of you. you felt even hornier watching his body form a sheet of sweat, his face contorting into pure pleasure, and you felt how his cock reached the deepest part of your cervix.
“fuck, look at that, creaming all over my cock, fuck princess cum for me, cum all over me, make a fuckin’ mess please,” he begged, kissing your lips, still being able to taste yourself on him from earlier. your hand went up to grab his wrist, beginning to buck your hips against his and feeling the burst of pleasure flood through your body, making your legs shake and your moans muffle against his lips. you were still gripping his wrist when he finally pulled back to watch you ride out your orgasm, and he felt like he could cum right then and there. your body was arching for him, aching for more of his touch, bouncing with each thrust, your body littered with purple bruises from giving you hickeys everywhere, how out of it you looked—he needed to cum.
“where do you want it baby? where do you want my cum?” he asked you, releasing your throat and kissing over the place his hand was.
you didn’t think about it for a minute. you wanted him in all his glory, you wanted every bit of him. you craved it for so long, that you’d be stupid not to tell him where you wanted it exactly.
“inside, please eddie, wanna feel you fill me up, need it,” your sentence was not correct, but it got the point across. you didn’t even have to make sense, the minute you said inside he was a goner. he pumped inside you a few more times before thrusting hard one last time, jerking and twitching inside of you as he covered his groans in your flesh.
“fuck, dude you’re so fucking amazing,” he breathed as his body collapsed on yours, his face shoved into your chest.
“did you just call me dude after you came inside of me?” you asked, making sure you heard right. it was funny to you, it was just so eddie.
he rolled over off of you, pulling out at the same time and laying next to you on his back.
“yeah, uh, sorry. force of habit,” he said sheepishly and turned his head to you, trying to read your facial expressions.
“can i clean you up? before i go, uh back downstairs. i don’t want dustin asking where i am just to find me with his sister,” he said and you rolled your eyes.
“he’s a big boy. i think he can handle knowing you like me.” you said and watched him.
“still. he’s my friend, i’d like to tell him on my own terms.” uou couldn’t help but smile, turning your body on your side to face him better and bring your hand to his face.
“you’re the sweetest, you know?” you said and rubbed your fingers over his jaw and stubble.
“i think it’s safe to say you’re the sweetest,” he said referring to the fact that he did very much in fact devour you whole on your vanity desk.
“i’m gonna shower, so don’t worry about cleaning me up. maybe next time, i’m a girl who likes a bit of aftercare.” you said and kissed his lips softly, softer than you did when he was inside you. he kissed back and reached to pull you closer, wanting more of you. you put your hand on his chest and pulled back, leaving him breathless.
“so, this isn’t a one time thing?” he asked as he tried to breathe normal again. the both of you sat up to gather your clothes and as he put them in, you stood up and walked to your dresser, grabbing a pair of panties, a shirt and some shorts not bothering to cover yourself as he gets dressed again.
the second he’s full dressed and standing, you walk up to him with your naked body still pressed against his body, and raise yourself up on your tip-toes to kiss his lips once more.
“i really hope not.”
#plus size smut#smut#fat girls#chubby smut#eddie munson#eddie x reader#eddie x henderson!reader#eddie x plus size reader#plus size reader#plus size representation#pure filth#eddie stranger things#stranger things#chubby
417 notes
·
View notes
Note
If you could indulge me, can I ask for something with The Amazing Digital Circus gang, with an s/o who is seen as an anchor for the others? They are strong willed, happy go lucky, supportive, a mediator and ect. Well, could they stumble upon their s/o just having an episode, just crying in frustration and like punching a wall to calm down and go back to acting like nothing happened?
I have a thing with strong willed characters hiding their weakness for the benefit of others.
TADC cast x emotional anchor!reader !
oh ho ho you silly lil fella, you have literally just described my TADC oc down to a T, i am going to have so much fun writing this because im literally just. going to use my oc as a place holder for the reader, just without describing any lore bits unique to them and their design ngl i think i went insane with this one, tally hall music is doing something to me
CAINE:
if you thought you were good at hiding your human despair just know that caine already knows. the only reason i feel he wouldnt initially come to you in your lesser moments of weakness is that he can acknowledge that youre trying to hide this part of you. does he go comfort you, and risk making you try harder to surpress your feelings; risking you to just blow up one day and have your mental state just totally collapse in one go? would you feel put off at the knowledge that in this world you never really have full privacy? that definitely wouldnt make you feel any better. but when it gets to the point where you're screaming and crying in your room and punching the walls he would step in. drags you away from the walls, and if he has to this man will restrain you if it means making sure you stop swinging. hes seen the downfall of many people within the circus, but seeing it from someone he so deeply cares for hits a different way. he may be an AI, but he can still simulate feeling. its a harrowing sensation as he lets you cling onto him. i think he makes an effort to make in house adventures less overwhelming and intense, too scared to push you over the edge but also too scared to leave you with nothing to do to distract you. i think he would stay with you for the night, too
POMNI:
as selfish as it sounds, pomni cant help but feel.. something in her chest. seeing you, the groups beacon of light falter fills her with some kind of fear and despair that she cant put into words. it reminds her that no one is above helplessness, and that at the end of the day youre just as capable of abstracting as everyone else. i think, when she finally sees your fake demeanor finally slip when you thought you were totally alone, she feels bad. i mean shes your partner, and she didnt pick up on any hints that may have indicated your true state of health. i dont think she would try to force you to speak, as much as i want to say that she would try to push for you to talk about how you feel i think her attempts to reach out to you would fall on deaf ears. i think she would put her hand on your shoulder, making you jump back to the present moment. its an awkward gesture, with the jester herself being a little lost with these new feelings... i think you two would just sit in silence
JAX:
similar to pomni, he feels this intense and unexplainable pang at the sight of the most hopeful and brightest person in the circus crumble. ive already said it but ill say it again, its like being splashed with cold water, with how hard that sinking cold feeling hits him. makes half hearted attempts to cheer you up. its not that he doesnt care, its that hes stuck in the shock of seeing the happiest person he knows flip into... this.. for a split second he thought you were abstracting, that pit his stomach becoming colder for a second before he realizes whats going on. ive said this before as well, but jax is not the best comforter, in fact i think he might be one of the worst out of the main cast. but i think so far for the characters ive written for this post, he makes an effort to try to pull you up out of your hole. at least he lets you cry your feelings out, and he wont make you feel bad for doing so
RAGATHA:
stands there in shock like pomni, before immediately rushing to your side and tugging you away from a coat stand you were kicking and beating. hands on your shoulders she tries to snap you back to the present moment, trying to tell you that shes here. any feelings of the helplessness that she shares with the previous two characters is shoved down. this isnt about her, its about you. runs her fingers through your hair, if your digital body has any, and just. rocks you. when you finally calm down enough to be able to form clear words, she reassures you once more that shes here for you. the two of you stay in that position, holding onto one another for the entire night. i think it should be said, but for most of these theyre going to try to keep a closer eye on you and make it a point to ask you how youre feeling. ragatha especially.
KINGER:
it reminds him of queenie. the sight brings back so so so many terrible memories. for a second he doesnt even register that hes standing in the present, standing in your doorway. stuck and frozen for a solid minute before you finally notice him, and you hold each others gaze. finally, you crumble. what was the point of hiding your mounting anguish now that it was discovered by the one you care for most? at the sight of your crumpled form i think kinger would snap back, and rush to your side. he's pause, afraid that you would abstract like the queen, before forcing himself to push through that fear in the back of his mind. a moment where he is not fumbling with himself or shaking; be it because he wants to be there for you or perhaps he still holds some guilt aimed towards himself for not being able to save his old queen, he refuses to leave your side even if you tell him to leave. theres this caution in his actions, mixed with this sort of determination to make sure you're okay. like ragatha, he would make it a point to make sure you're okay long after this incident
ZOOBLE:
zooble would probably be the only one who doesnt make their presence known to you while you're in that state. not because they wont care about you, in fact they care about you a lot. but theyre so unsure of what to do, that they give to you what they would have wanted for themselves, if they were in your shoes. they want to grant you privacy, and to at least keep a shred of the now ruined façade you had been putting on for everyone. if it means keeping it will give you comfort, then they wont take that away from you. they wait outside your door, waiting for the height of your episode to pass before cracking the door open. they dont say anything about what they had just heard, but you seem to know that they know.. i mean they came in so soon after you had calmed yourself down enough.
"are you okay?" a dumb question, but what else was there for them to say? you so obviously werent okay, and you likely werent for a long time. they offer to leave, to give you some time to pick yourself back up, but they also make it clear that they wont go anywhere if you dont want to be alone. the night is tense and awkward, filled with conversation before they eventually broach the topic... i think you guys would develop some sort of secret code. i mean youve been hiding your true feelings for so long, and outwardly saying you need help would compromise that mask you put up for yourself. be it a certain sentence or arrangement of objects, you two come up with a indirect way of asking for security
GANGLE:
she feels so helpless, the most out of everyone. she tries to get your attention, but her words fall on deaf ears, if they even manage to pry themselves out of her mouth. far too weak to pull you away and keep you from hurting yourself, but too soft spoken to bark out a word to draw your attention to her. truly, she feels useless. she isnt able to capture your attention until you finally notice her. similar to kingers part, you fall. she takes an unsure step towards you, hands half raised in front of her as she debates if you want to be touched or not. she settles to sitting in front of you, just barely holding eye contact... she looks down when you tear your eyes away from her. finally finding her voice, i think she would ask if you want her to stay, or if you need anything. she tries to word it the best she can, but she lets you know that she doesnt think any less of you for your outburst. it happens to the best of us, really it does. if you want her too, she wraps herself around you and tries to soothe your shaking form
#tadc x reader#the amazing digital circus x reader#digital circus x reader#caine x reader#pomni x reader#jax x reader#ragatha x reader#kinger x reader#zooble x reader#gangle x reader
261 notes
·
View notes
Text
i haven’t heard from you since.
chris sturniolo x fem reader.
idk if i specified but they’re in a relationship and have been for like 3 years!!
also hey y’all i disappeared for a while but i’m back 😛and i’m currently trying to get through the requests so be ready 😈love y’all. bee ❤️🩹
how had it become like this? it seemed so unbelievable that there was a point in yoir life where you thought you were going to marry him, have children, and grow old together. if someone would have told you three years ago that you would both end up like this you would have laughed in their face. he used to be so sweet, so passionate about you, but now that couldnt be further from the truth.
you werent really sure when the change happened, or why it happened maybe a little after your birthday, maybe before. of course you knew people grow apart but this wasnt growth. this was borderline misery. the constant fighting, the days of ignoring one another, the nights where chris would come home at 2am and not say a word to you after you had been waiting up for him, it was nothing short of torture.
but still every single time, both of you just let it blow over, waiting until the next bomb went off, but the long lasting was lasting a little too long.
"oh please, like you were actually worries" he scoffed, taking his hat off and throwing it on the kitchen table.
"you stormed out on me, you didnt even tell me where you were, youve been gone for 5 hours and you stroll in at almost 3am expecting me to be cool about it? what fucking planet are you living on" you said staring at him.
he didnt even reply he just shook his head, leaning against the counter and crossing his arms, keeping his eyes trained to the floor. a moment of silence passed as you waited for him to say something, anything, and finally he took a deep breath in and pulled his eyes up to meet yours.
"maybe i just dont wanna fucking be around you" his voice was quiet and soft, a stark contrast to the sharpness of his words. his expression was stoic and completely unreadable.
he watched the colour drain from your face, as he did every time he would bark an insult at you. a small part of him felt nothing but pure joy to know that he had the power to completely crush you, like when murderers say they feel no remorse for the people theyve killed, but another small part of him was bleeding, a self-inflicted stinging, like a pain he had never felt before.
"you know what chris, day by day i realize everything i miss about you was never there in the first place, the person i fell in love with was a fucking mirage." your words were dripping with venom. his face faltered for a second, momentarily letting the mask slip, and the pain your words were causing him beginning to slip out.
"you dont mean that" he looked like he was about to burst into tears, and it made your mouth run dry.
you tried so hard to keep it together, but the tears that had gathered in your waterline threatened to spill with every single Shakey breath you took. there was a pregnant pause and the effect of your words hung in the air. chris stared at you intensely and you let your eyes rest anywhere but on him, you couldnt look at him, at the chance of seeing him with watery eyes and a wobbly lip might make you fall at his feet once more.
you took a deep breath before eventually meeting his gaze and beginning to talk.
"i dont know why things changed chris.... but one day i woke up and we no longer spoke the same language, and i havent heard from you since" chris watched every time as he crushed you, but now as he took your place, standing there with his hands by his sides, mouth hanging open, taking rapid breaths, in and out, while trying not to cry, he felt as though you had murdered him.
"that doesnt mean i dont love you y/n, we can work through this, weve done it before, ill be better i promise i will" he spoke with a wobbly voice.
the tears were now full force streaming down your face. he stood there across the kitchen with wide eyes, trying to think of how to come back from this, but there was something about the way you opened your mouth to speak again, that told him there wasnt.
"i cant relax around you chris, if i relaxed my body now, id fall apart. if i relaxed for a fucking second, id never find my way back. why cant you see that?" you paused for a moment and shook your head at him in disbelief. "why cant you see that you are tearing me limb for limb when i have done nothing but love you? why cant you understand that i have poured all of my heart and soul onto you to try and wash away whatever it is thats made you like this and you are throwing it back in my face? i mean when will this fucking end?" you were yelling and you hadnt even realized you had made your way over to him and were now standing less than a foot away.
"y/n please, dont do this. ill get my shit together and ill be better because i love you" he looked at you with pleading eyes as he spoke, reaching out to grab your hand, but when you pulled away before he even got the chance to even feel your skin on his, it was like he had died right there in that second.
"do you?" you whispered, swallowing thickly, desperately trying to stop the floodgates from opening more.
chriss face was wet with tears as he stared down at you sniffling. he opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out. he was completely gob smacked. he never thought it would get to this point. but as your eyes bored into his, wordlessly begging him to say something that would fix this, he felt as though the earth was crumbling beneath his feet.
his silence gave you all the answers that you needed, so with that you turned around and walked away, and the sound of his broken voice calling your name, spoke volumes.
he knew it was over, he knew that you were about to go upstairs and pack your bags and walk out the door, but he didnt do a thing to try and stop you, he knew he wouldnt be able to fix this even if he tried, so he watched you walk away, and the second you were out of sight, he fell to his knees, clutching his chest like he was dying and letting out sob after sob, like it would mend all damage he had done.
in the next room, you were frantically trying to keep your self control. the urge to walk back in there and wipe his tear-stained cheeks and kiss his broken heart better was paralyzing. the sound of him wailing and weeping was soul crushing, but this had to be done, one of you had to be strong enough to walk away.
you knew he would leave such an imprint on you, he had left such severe claw marks that anyone you even entertained after chris, would have to know him in order to understand you, and that might have been the worst fucking part.
—————————————-—————————————
taglist: @christinarowie332 @biimpanicking @chrisenthusiast @soursturniolo @kitaysworld @kvtie444 @mattslolita @flowerxbunnie @lovingsturniolo @its-jennarose @ermdontmindthisaccount @secret-sturniolo @rac00ns-are-c00l4 @justaslvttygirl @urfavstromboli @recklesssturniolo @delimeats-000 @nickdevora @gwenlore @sturnioloenthusiast
#mango talks#nick sturniolo#chris sturniolo#christopher sturniolo#sturniolo triplets#chris sturniolo x reader#chris sturniolo x you#matt sturniolo x reader#matt sturniolo x you#matt sturniolo imagine#christopher owen sturniolo#chris sturniolo blurb#chris sturniolo oneshot#chris sturniolo smut#chris sturniolo imagine#matt sturniolo smut#matthew sturniolo#matt sturniolo#sturniolo#sturniolo fanfic#my stuff#angst#love yall
245 notes
·
View notes
Note
HII!! i love your writing sm, so i wanted to send in a request. I KNOW THIS IS SO CLICHÉ AND OVERDONE 😭😭 BUT could you possibly write a seven minutes in heaven scenario with ellie or abby. maybe reader n ellie/abby don’t really like each other, or they have tension ?? idk
seven minutes
SETTING : college / modern au
WC : 3120
WARNINGS : not beta read , fingering , cunnilingus ( r!recieving both ) , kinda vanilla again ( sorry ) , top!ellie , one-sided rivalry , intentional lowercase , this might kinda seem like dubcon but it’s not reader is just shy , english isn’t my first language and i’m not perfectly fluent so there might be mistakes ( lmk if there’s any )
A / N : hii everyone !! aaa im so glad i finally finished this 😭😭 i love these corny cliche scenarios soooo much but only when it’s w women otherwise it’s just so bleh . women do everything better so true !! anywhooo i hope u guys enjoy this and tysm for requesting this bc i wanted to write something like this but didnt think anyone would want it .. ALSO IM SO SORRY I FORGOT TO INCLUDE ABBY WHEN I STARTED WRITING BC I SAVED THE ASK TO DRAFTS TO KEEP IT THERE N ONLY NOTICED NOW JFJDHDKDJ pls forgive me .. ill include ellie & abby tension over reader in the future i promise 🙏🙏
— 𓆩♥︎𓆪 —
“dina, i’m not going.”
you had no idea how many times you told her this, but you weren’t planning on changing your mind. you had gone to a few parties here and there, sure, but it wasn’t really your thing. you enjoyed going to them every once in a while to go out and loosen up, get your mind off of stress, but that was it. you weren't particularly crazy about it at the same level of other people your age, not even as much as dina, who’s considered a more casual partygoer. you had given her some excuse about having a project to work on, but the truth was, that wasn’t your concern. in fact, you didn’t have a project to work on at all. you made it all up. you even considered going to that party when dina first told you about it, but a few days later you overheard some classmates talk about how ellie williams out of all people would be going.
ellie ellie ellie. she drive you nuts for all the wrong reasons. you could tell she disliked you from the start, which that in itself made you dislike her as well. you wondered what you could’ve possibly done to anger her. but your dislike for her only grew when you realized just how irresponsible she was. she slept in, often came hungover to class, and yet she still scored the highest. even higher than you. and that really set you off. you had been an overachiever all your life, and all of a sudden some loser who doesn’t even put any effort into anything is beating you at everything. but most of all, it intrigued you a little more than it did anger you. you wished you could take a peek into her brain and see how the hell she managed to do it. your first thought was she copied answers off of people. seemed the most logical, right? but she was scoring the highest. how the hell could she score higher than anyone that she could even copy off of? hell, she even answered open-ended questions more detailed and well-written than you did. it didn’t make any sense. that’s the worst part of it all. you couldn’t even come up with a logical explanation as to how she could even do this.
little did you know, though, she was completely aware of your one-sided rivalry, and she found it adorable. she never tried to compete with you, but she thought it was hilarious watching you try so hard to compete with her. the first time she saw you, she was immediately drawn to you. your spotless image, valedictorian from your high school who had a perfect gpa and perfect test scores. you were perfect. but she wanted to see you crack. she wanted to see what was under all those layers (both figuratively and literally) and see what you were truly like. she knew you seeing her put in no effort into school yet still doing better than you would anger you. that’s exactly what she wanted. sure, she was in a way getting you to hate her, but it was a risk she was willing to take just to get a reaction out of you. and little did you know, you were attracted to her. and she was aware.
“come on, i don’t know why you’re acting like this all of a sudden,” dina whined. “you said you’d come along when i first told you about it.”
“i said i’d think about it,” you corrected her. “i’m just not really feeling it. besides i already told you i have this project to work on.”
“what’s it for?”
“it’s, uh..” you tried to come up with a lie on the spot. “it’s for calculus.”
“no way, we have a project in that class?” she asked, surprised, “i can’t believe i had no idea! when is it due?”
shit. you forgot you had that class with her.
“it’s for tomorrow, i think..” you kept going along with your lie.
“bullshit,” she laughed, “if we really had a project due tomorrow you would already have it done. and there’s no way i’d miss a project for that class!”
“fine,” you sighed, “i just needed an excuse so you’d leave me alone. but i really don’t want to go.”
“nope, because you lied you have to come.”
“why?!”
“because it’s fair!” she said, “besides, you definitely owe me one for going to that stupid concert with you the other day.”
you rolled your eyes. “you said you enjoyed it.”
“yeah, well, i lied. do you seriously think i’d ever like-“
“alright that’s enough!” you sighed. “i’ll go. but we are leaving early that night”
“deal.”
— 𓆩♥︎𓆪 —
“dinaaa, hurry up!” you knocked on the bathroom door. the main downside of sharing an apartment with your best friend was the fact she took forever to get out of the bathroom. you both decided it would be a good idea, you found a nice complex near campus and the rent was almost the same as a dorm room, so it was a no-brainer.
“five minutes!” she yelled back. five minutes my ass, you thought. at least this time you thought ahead of time and got in there before her. your outfit wasn’t anything fancy, of course, but you still wanted to dress cute. you had a black tube mini-skirt and white baby tee, just something you threw on that was comfortable but still looked alright. you had struggled a little to decide what to wear, you didn’t want to stand out too much but you still for some reason wanted to impress ellie deep down. you just brushed this off as an unwanted thought and ignored it, but it continued to linger in your mind. why do i even care what she thinks of me? you asked yourself.
about fifteen minutes later, dina finally came out of the bathroom.
“you said five”
“well, i still look good, don’t i?” she jokingly posed.
“yeah, yeah, whatever. let’s get going.”
— 𓆩♥︎𓆪 —
if there was one thing you could absolutely not stand about house parties, it was the stench inside the house. god was it awful. half of these people were frat boys who didn’t know what deodorant was and had been sweaty all night, and all this mixed with the smell of alcohol just made matters worse. most of the people were inside the house enjoying the music and the drinks, but you simply hung outside with dina chatting while drinking out of those cliche red cups you see in movies. you really couldn’t wait to get out of there, but yet again, that little voice in the back of your head made you think about ellie. you thought it was good you didn’t see her, but at the same time, you wanted to see her. it was a strange feeling. you couldn’t tell if it was curiosity, intrusive thoughts, or attraction. whatever it was, there was no way it was the last option.
about an hour passed and you were starting to get bored. just as you were about to suggest to dina you leave, a group of 8-ish people came out of the house to the backyard. among them was ellie. the moment you saw her you realized just how attractive she is. you had never looked at her enough to tell, but now it was evident. now you were even more confused. but you simply told yourself you can think she’s attractive and not be attracted to her.
you were so lost in thought you didn’t even realize one of the guys was talking to you and dina had to hit you on the shoulder to get your attention.
“is this chick high or something?” one of them laughed.
“uh- no- sorry. just kinda pensive.” you tried your hardest to avoid eye contact with ellie, and luckily this time you managed to do so. it just would’ve made things way more awkward.
“anyway-“ one of the guys started. “we were thinking since none of us wanna be with those people inside the house, we could just do something else to have fun.”
“what’re you thinking?” dina asked.
“7 minutes in heaven.”
you and dina were both a little stunned. you would’ve thought about some other thing, but you decided to go along with it anyway. not like anything could go wrong.
you all sat in a circle, and one of them began explaining the rules.
“simple, you spin the bottle, whoever it lands on, you have to go in the shed for 7 minutes and do any romantic or sexual act. kissing, making out, having sex even. but there has to be some proof you did something. if you didn’t do anything in the 7 minutes or refused to do anything in the first place, you take a shot. everyone got it?”
everyone nodded, and the game began. most people took a shot, about half an hour of the game went by and not a single person had gone into the shed. you landed on a few of the guys and vice versa, and while most of them were totally down to go in the shed with you, you most definitely weren’t. you weren’t sure if it was just you imagining things, but you felt you saw the slightest bit of anger and jealousy in ellie’s eyes anytime the bottle landed on you and the guys wanted to go in the shed with you, and she was relieved any time you took a shot. you found it strange. why did it matter to her? but you were sure you were just making things up.
you were starting to feel more and more tipsy from the drinks, standing on the line between drunk and sober. you were self-aware enough to tell yourself to not have any more drinks. one more spin, you told yourself. that was it. you spun the bottle, and surprise surprise, it landed on none other than ellie herself.
there was an awkward silence for a moment. you didn’t know what to do. it would be super awkward if either one of you accepted and the other declined.
one of the guys broke the silence first. “sooo.. are y’all going in the shed or not?”
“depends on her.” ellie smirked.
your face got a little hot. a soft red tinted your cheeks and you nodded, accepting in the heat of the moment. you were sure it was just your drunk mind making the decisions for you, but it wasn’t. you were very aware of the decision you had just made. but it hadn’t hit you yet. not until she walked behind you into the shed and shut the door.
“didn’t think you were into me like that,” ellie broke the silence. “i always thought you hated me or somethin’.”
you didn’t really know what to say. you mumbled some nonsense trying to come up with something fast.
“do i make you nervous?” she asked.
“sort of..” you were able to respond.
“ohh, i see,” she interrupted. “you just pretended to hate me for whatever reason.”
“no!” you protested. “i wasn’t pretending- i mean, i don’t hate you, it’s just. ugh.”
you gave up on trying to explain yourself when you realized just how childish and irrational you acted. seriously, disliking someone for outperforming you at your big age? the more you thought about it, the more embarassed you were about it. was it the alcohol doing this to you? it was all so confusing.
“why’d you accept to come into the shed with me?”
you didn’t respond, just shrugged. you didn’t know. you must’ve woken up on the wrong side of bed or something. you were acting very irrational today, and it’s like someone else was making decisions for you.
you didn’t realize she had pretty much backed you against one of the walls of the small room until now. this feeling, that you couldn’t quite put a name on, was so sudden and so foreign. did you have feelings for her that you had just been pushing away all this time because of jealousy? if not, what the hell was it?
her hand wandered up your skirt, stopping right before reaching your cunt. she looked up at you as if asking for approval, and although you hesitated for a moment, it’s as if your body made the decision for you and you nodded.
she didn’t waste any time and dipped her hand in your panties, rubbing circles on your clit to tease you, causing you to whimper and moan softly.
“so classy and put together whenever i see you, but look at you right now,” she teased. “no one would ever think you’d be whimpering for me like this.”
you blushed and looked away in embarrassment. you didn’t get why that made you blush. so many thoughts were racing through your head, so many conflicting feelings. yet you didn’t try to pull away, even though you had many opportunities to do so.
her touches weren’t enough and you were starting to get desperate, causing you to lightly buck your hips back and forth trying to feel her more.
“oh? someone’s desperate,” she chuckled. “alright, princess, i’ll give you what you want.”
you weren’t sure what she meant by that or what she was planning to do, but, for whatever reason, you trusted her.
she pulled her hand out of your panties, making you whine at the lack of contact.
“don’t worry, baby,” she said, getting down on her knees, her face at the level of your cunt. “i’ll take care of you real good.”
she started pulling down your panties and threw them somewhere on the floor, motioning you to put your leg on her shoulder. you seemed hesitant, thinking your leg might be kind of heavy for her to support on her shoulder. but she assured you it’d be fine.
her mouth was now millimeters away from your cunt. “if it’s too much, tell me to stop.” she looked up at you. you nodded, a little scared, but you still wanted to trust her.
she gave a long lick along your slit to tease you, making you gasp from the contact. she started mercilessly licking and sucking on your clit a little more intensely than you’d like her to, but at the same time, you liked it. you couldn’t tell her to stop. whimpers and moans came out of your mouth, being all that could be heard inside the small room aside from the wet sounds of ellie’s mouth on your cunt. you struggled more and more each second to stand as your legs wobbled and trembled from the sensation. she slid a finger inside you with ease, thrusting it in and out of you at a rapid pace which made you struggle to contain your moans that you started trying so hard to conceal since they only kept getting louder and louder. you had only been in that shed for about 6 minutes, but you were already about to reach your climax. and ellie was aware of this. she sped up her pace a little more, slurping up your juices like it was nothing.
after a moment, she lifted your leg from her shoulder and held your arm while getting up to make sure you could stabilize your footing.
“you okay?”
you nodded, and suddenly you realized what had just happened. ellie williams ate you out. you let the girl you swore you hated so bad eat you out, and you enjoyed it. you didn’t know what was the most shocking; that she didn’t hate you too, that she was even attracted to you, that she wanted to eat you out, or that you just let her. you weren’t sure wether you regretted it or not.
“what, you’re surprised you liked it or something?” she laughed, as if she had read your mind.
you felt your cheeks tint a slight red, and looked away in embarrassment, confirming she was right.
“shut up.” you rolled your eyes, turning to leave, but she grabbed your arm and stopped you.
“listen,” she looked into your eyes. “if you want, we can just forget about this. we don’t have to tell ‘em what happened.”
you nodded, and you both awkwardly walked back to the circle.
— 𓆩♥︎𓆪 —
when you sat back down, dina looked you up and down and giggled.
“why’re you looking at me like that?” you whispered to her.
“you think we’re dumb?” she giggled. “there’s a reason neither of you had to take a shot. like for example, your messy hair.”
you realized it was obvious, and you wanted the ground to swallow you whole right there. you had a lot of different feelings about what just happened, but the main one was embarrassment. it would’ve been one thing if it happened and you didn’t like it, but the fact that you enjoyed it was humiliating. not only did you like it, but you wanted more. you started to take a liking to her, and you hated that.
after about 15 more minutes, everyone got tired of the game and decided to end it. you and dina decided to just go home now, although it was a little early, since you hadn’t been enjoying yourselves much.
as you waited on the front lawn of the house for your uber to get there, you heard a voice calling from behind.
“dina!”
you both turned around and surprise surprise, it was ellie.
“what is it?”
“can i talk to your friend real quick?”
you and dina looked at each other, and you sighed and decided to talk to her. you thought it’ll be quick, and if anything, when the uber arrives you can use it as your get out of jail free card.
you walked over to her and she seemed to be abnormally tense.
“i just, uh. i wanted to ask if you were fine after all that.” she mumbled with a genuine expression on her face.
“ellie, it’s fine.” you sighed.
“are you sure?”
“yes, don’t worry about it. seriously.”
you thought that was it, but she clearly had something else on her mind.
“ellie, spit it out.”
“well, also,” she looked up at you, “i wanted to ask you for your number. i don’t think i’ve ever actually talked to you aside from today.”
you chuckled in disbelief at the audacity this girl had. clearly she knew you’d say no, and just wanted to rile you up. but you wouldn't give her that satisfaction, so you dropped the expression immediately and instead had a calm look on your face.
“maybe some other time, babe”
— 𓆩♥︎𓆪 —
A / N : u guys know i don’t rlly like adding notes at the end of my fics but i felt i must clarify the last sentence isn’t reader having a complete 180 change of personality all of a sudden rather just acting different than she was right before leaving to sort of leave ellie stunned if that makes sense but i didn’t know how to end it and clarify that eheh also i might make a part 2 of this after i finish my next fic and the part 2 to my other fic if u guys want it <3 also ONCE AGAIN english is not my first language i’m not completely fluent yet and i write as a way to practice ++ i don’t have a beta reader sooo if u guys find mistakes PLEASE let me know !! thx for reading <33
#arielle writes ୨୧#arielle’s 18+ ୨୧#ellie williams x reader#ellie williams#the last of us#ellie x reader#the last of us 2#tlou#tlou 2#ellie williams x you#tlou x reader
436 notes
·
View notes
Text
So I think I finally know what my favorite or at least most emotionally impactful moment was of ASOCAS and it was this: When Kit first saw my Wesper Artbook.
Mans jaw dropped when I told him I was the one who made it, told me how impressive /amazing (some sort of that was) and went right back to open mouth stare as I started to flip through it a bit.
At the moment I really had no idea what clever thing to say. I did say things of course, answered to what he was commenting, said a few things about some of the pieces in there especially the 0.2 seconds Wesper moment in the S2 trailer redraw I did back in then. Talking to him was very easy for me overall. I didnt stammer, nothing, actually felt always quite calm whenever I saw him and realized. You know what, he's just another fellow person and I do know how to talk to people so.
But anyways, today it just really hit me. If that was a genuine reaction to my art (I am just paranoid b they do be actors ya know but if certainly felt genuine to me) then I had Kit Young speechless for a few seconds... and that somehow hits me quite hard.
I KNOW why it does too, but I am not sure I can explain it adequately what exactly it is about that that makes me feel so much right now. If anyone would like me to elaborate I will try tho to make it as clear as possible what I mean.
I can tell you it is vaguely related to a certain piano scene tho and the fact that somehow I had absolutely NO, zero, nada, clue or expectations how both Kits and Jack's reaction to my Artbook would be and when I got it, it's still taking me to process. Heck I could make another post about Jack's reactions too.
Bless ASOCAS staff for capturing this exact moment, I had no idea these pics exists until I saw it on their IG story.
#asocas2#wesper artbook#my stuff#wylan cosplay#kit young#jesper fahey#wylan van eck#wesper#art stuff#asocas#a storm of crows and shadows
281 notes
·
View notes
Text
like its ok to wish that hunter did more to get crosshair out but i will say PLEASE stop saying that rescuing the literal helpless child from the child murdering fascists was somehow wrong of Hunter.
also like. can we stop undermining the very clear and obvious way that crosshair liked the power that he was given in the empire, especially over others, he was radicalized. he convinced himself that the war crimes were justified in the name of power. that is a far bigger problem and something that is going to haunt him far longer and requires a lot more to undo and forgive (and some people will never and should never do that, and others can't bc they are Dead)
to say it was all the effects of the chips, at this point in the series, its just not true. the events of aftermath specifically are 100% the chip. Everything after that is up for debate. We don't know when it was taken out, but at some point it was, and crosshair's pov is that it doesn't matter when, bc he likes where he's at. Had he not been abandoned by the empire on Kamino for so long, I doubt he would have ever changed, had Cody not deserted after confronting him about what it was the clones were doing, I doubt he would have ever changed. Had he not been forced to see Mayday's struggle and fight to bring him home and still after everything they both gave after everything suffered mayday died not in battle but because someone couldn't be bothered to even try to help him, I don't think he would have changed. I don't think Hunter could talk him out of it, and maybe he didn't try hard enough, or really, at all. Crosshair's version of loyalty, though, is blind, unquestioning, a soldiers loyalty. Obeying what they were doing, things that Hunter couldn't obey, and would have made him a monster to do.
But I can't imagine the disgust I would be forced to contend with if like, my family member came forward like "oh yes we're built to be soldiers, that doesn't mean preserving or protecting innocents, It means power and killing those who get in my way. its my purpose in life and i think you're stupid for not getting over the moral objections" like what do you even say to that. Hunter at that point had SEEN what the empire was doing. They both had, their home planet, (and head canons aside, all clones did in fact, in canon, see it as their home.) orbitally bombarded to secure power. How do you talk someone out of that, if fundamentally what your disagreement is on the value of life. You don't. Hence Hunter's demands in S3E5 to know what changed. What finally made Crosshair realize what he believed, about power and his purpose, was wrong.
Crosshair didn't want out. Crosshair was upset they didn't stay. He saw their purpose as being with the Empire. They escaped and ran and deserted. If they weren't with him, in the Empire, then they should die, like the Jedi, and Crosshair did absolutely believe that.
So this is all to say that. they are not equally responsible for what happened to their squad. Crosshair didn't have a choice at first— but once he did keep running right over that line. And a lot of us hoped that he was lying about the chip, that he wasn't entirely responsible for all that he did. But he was. That's clear at this point.
Even the whole chip matter— it's prolly really hard for Hunter to separate it. logically, he knows it was partially the chip at this point. But at that point in the story he watched someone he was incredibly close to nearly kill them all and at the time he had no idea why. If Hunter'd not grabbed Omega by the leg and tripped her she would be shot dead. If omega hadn't surprised Crosshair by shooting his gun out of his hand he would have killed Hunter. He shot wrecker, to use him as bait against the rest of them? Like, again, we all knew about the chip, but I can understand the emotional toll of such a thing bc he DIDNT at the time. The betrayal in that moment? How do you let it go?
But thats all fine! its interesting its character development and its the story they were determined to tell. But like. we can be honest.
Now if someone thinks that im wrong i'd love to know what exactly hunter needs to be sorry about, and why he's equally responsible that doesn't like either downplay the war crimes and murder and doesn't throw Omega like directly into harms way and under the bus.
#im still seeing variations on he CHOSE a GIRL HE DIDNT KNOW over his BROTHER#yes. bc crosshair is a grown man who can kill people whom for reasons unknown to hunter At The Time was trying to kill them. and almost did#even not knowing her. omegas a fucking innocent child. yes most sane people with an ounce of compassion will prioritize making sure shes ok#they're prolly never gonna have a blowout argument where hunter grovels guys and its bc. what would he be groveling for.#im sorry i didn't do the war crimes with you they looked fun? please be real#the bad batch#the bad batch spoilers
57 notes
·
View notes
Note
ok hello i have found that i have no choice but to introduce you to my "divorced zukka but slightly to the left" headcanon for a modern au. basically, a pre-transitioned zuko and sokka have a one night stand at the end of their senior year of high school, and never speak again. roughly six years later, sokka is starting his job at an elementary school (not a classroom teacher, like technology or something) and meets izumi, who is so sweet and cute and i swear thats the face katara makes when she's annoyed, and one day happens to see her dad pick up and huh he looks and AWFUL lot like that person i went to high school with and OH GOD some quick math brings an idea to mind.
So sokka attempts to confront zuko who is very much NOPE DO NOT TALK TO ME, but finally breaks down after a series of shenanigans that def do not involve mild stalking. but only to admit that yes, izumi is sokka's biological daughter, and would like to leave their interactions at that, except sokka has NO interest in SIMPLY leaving it at that because!!! he has a kid!!! that he knew nothing about!!! for six years!!!
zuko very much would like to continue living his life without sokka bc being a single young parent is hard enough but he has a good routine and good relationship with his daughter and he doesnt need this, this, SPERM DONOR to just come in here and mess everything up! the guy hasnt been there the last six years, there is absolutely no reason for his to get involved now!! BUT sokka absolutely would have been there if zuko had only TOLD HIM, but how was ZUKO supposed to know that, and did zuko really think so little of him?? except it was a one night stand and zuko didnt even realize he was a boy until right after and he originally wasnt even planning to keep izumi, and HOW could he have just given up their CHILD without ever even telling sokka about her and given him a CHANCE to take her, and WE WERE JUST KIDS AND HE WAS SCARED-
its complicated. and involves a lot of trying not to shout around izumi, who is just over the moon that her dad and her favorite teacher know each other outside of school. and there's a lot of heartache over sokka having to come to terms with the fact that yeah, hes not izumis parent, and there's only so much he can do without stepping on zuko's toes, and he only wants what is best for izumi, and zuko seeing that maybe sokka really does want to be all in for izumi even if zuko thinks sokka really doesnt fully understand what that means, and would it be such a bad thing? not that either of them are going to admit this to the other.
so it starts with small things, like sokka being allowed to pay child support (which hes been begging to do since day one), and maybe it turns out that zukos new coworker is sokkas friend and they end up at the same party where they can really see each other interact with izumi, and a chunk zuko's summer child care plans for the summer fall apart so sokka offers to babysit since his summer job is remote which feels BIG but also reallyyyyy too convenient to reject,
and then something bigger happens where izumi gets hurt at school and while sokka is blaming himself he's also panicking bc the hospital wont let him stay with her bc hes not an emergency contact so he steels himself and later tells zuko he wants to make his relationship to izumi legal. hes not going to have a custody fight, he would never ask for that, but he wants his name on her birth certificate and wants his name on her list of emergency contacts, and its the first time zuko understand that sokka 100% knows what he's getting into here and is willing to be in this 100%.
So maybe sokka moves into this "uncle sokka" role, because zuko still refuses to tell izumi that sokka is her other dad, and yeah that hurts, but sokka would rather have part of izumi's life if he can't have all of it. and sokka gets a better look inside their lives and discovers that its HARD being a young single parent, why would zuko have risked everything he worked for to mix in some guy he barely knew who might decide that zuko wasn't good enough and take izumi away? and zuko sees the pain sokka has from missing out on so many key moments of izumi's young life, and the more sokka is proving himself as a second parent, the more guilty zuko feels. they go through some shit together and its more and more evident that sokka doesnt just want to be that fun uncle, but he's ready more than willing to be a PARENT even when it means being the bad guy.
and maybe they start falling for each other a little, because they are starting to have this LIFE together and its not just about izumi anymore its the way zuko rolls his eyes and gets the new fancy ice pack out of the freezer when a limping sokka brings izumi back from the park, and its the way sokka makes zuko genuinely laugh after a long day at work, and its like their lives are getting fully intertwined-
except that they arent. and they couldn't. because if sokka decides its too much. because if zukos good favor runs out. if it didnt work out between them. they couldnt do that to izumi. what they have is good, its fine, (even if its not enough) they dont want to risk anything that could disrupt izumi's life. shes the priority. and sure, she's already asking questions about the two of them, but what if they don't work right in a real relationship? the way things are now, either of them could back out, and everyone would eventually be ok. maybe. except every time they think about the possibility, it seems like they are already too intertwined, and either of them trying to untangle would just be a disaster, so imagine if they HAD to untangle, and-
so they just end up in an awkward stage of sad pining. because theres no way it would actually work out. because it would hurt all of them. and their life has never been better, but it's never hurt this much either.
ok so i didnt realize i could still write this long in an ask, but essentially i am not a masochist like you, and they do figure it out in the end. this could happen a number of ways, such as izumi just announcing that yeah this is my dad and his boyfriend, or zukka doing the "pining make outs that we never talk about until one of us snaps and we decide to let ourselves be fucking happy", or a very funny "we both snap and bone for one wonderful night to get it out of our system and then we dont talk about it" which leads to an accidental second baby where sokka and zuko both laugh and say whelp it must be fate lets do this the right way this time.
the most important thing is that they both forget to tell izumi that sokka is her biological father, so teenage izumi is very shocked and upset that shes just had to learn this from something totally mundane like applying for a passport, and sokka and zuko do the spider man finger pointing of "i thought you told her" "no, you were supposed to tell her" "did we really not tell her?" and its absolutely disgusting how cute they are
thanks for coming to my tedtalk
i love every single thing about this! sokka wanting to be a part of izumi's life and help zuko out....zuko being reluctant to accept but eventually seeing how sokka is proving himself.....the limbo period where they are both afraid it could end any moment....TOO GOOD! i love every single option for how they could get together for real like this is my favorite take on modern au divorced zukka by far!!!! <3 <3
#screaming over 'i am not a masochist like you' you got me#thank you SO MUCH for sharing this with me it is seriously amazing!!#i read it last night before going to sleep and then couldnt stop thinking about it for a while LMAO#divorced zukka#michkit#ask me stuff
207 notes
·
View notes
Note
ive been so fascinated by how much of a liar phil is lately (i mean this in the most complimentary way like the wall he has up between him and his content compared to dan is so interesting, the way they balance each other out), so it was cool to see a few posts discussing it the other day. im curious, what videos do you think youd consider phil to be the most "mask-off" in? trying to collect them for my #studies lol
hmmm hard to say! ofc the softlaunch era was when both of them started getting a bit more real, but phil still had a lot of barriers up even as they were slowly allowing themselves to signal queerness. a moment i think about a lot recently is in "coming out- one year later." i think this video is way more real than the coming out video itself. of course COTY is 100% equally as important as BIG, but phil intentionally kept it lowkey and more comedic than full seriousness because it was meant to be, for phil, just coming out to more people as he was already out to the people most important to him and comfortable with not talking about it publicly, compared to BIG which had all of dan's comedic tones ofc but was ultimately about him having to finally confront this deepseated trauma he's had his whole life. and so phil's more lowkey video as well as quote tweeting dan's video as his Actual coming out was meant to uplift dan's voice more as (while im not saying phil didnt go thru trauma bc tbh every gay kid in the 90s did), it pertained to something that phil felt had a more poignant message.
SO! in his 1 year update on Being Publicly Gay, there's a moment where phil talks about how he didn't realize the impact that coming out as a public figure would have on him because he felt that, well he already had his coming out journey so it's not a huge deal, but in reality it was this giant sigh of relief. he talks about how he doesnt feel as stressed about having to hide everything or accidentally slipping up and saying something gay, and he talks about the impact that the fan reaction has had on him, people thanking him and telling him that they related so much to his experiences and he helped them come out to family or even coming out in the comments section. i guess because his goal of that video was for it to be a quieter coming out than dan's, he just didn't realize how big it actually was for HIM until he'd done it. and when he talks about this he gets forreal emotional and like, gets real quiet and smiles to himself and seems like he might be about to cry. which is like. CRAZY cuz not only has he never cried on camera but all anecdotes abt phil were like "oh phil never cries even irl" "yeah i just keep them all back" like not that he's not emotional but he's not like dan who cries at movies or me who is currently crying while typing this up over how emotional this all makes me LOL. like.... AAAAHHH it's so good, like ofc with the dapg renaissance we're now seeing a more Adult side of phil's sense of humor and personality and he and dan are just generally speaking more themselves around each other, but like. that moment really fucking HITS DIFFERENT.
42 notes
·
View notes