#*there are occasionally small children at my work and I have a bad habit of swearing in front of them

[chiropteracupola]

list of things I've thought about doing instead of this paper:

run away from college and become a chiropractor (probably pretty easy and I think I would be good at it)

run away from college and become a lady's maid / gentleman's valet but only if the gentleman wears corsets that I can lace or unlace for them (significantly more difficult I imagine)

hang out with small children (I don't know any small children and historically am not good at hanging out with them*)

start a petition to get rid of daylight savings time

move the sun with my mind so that it's still here at 5pm

write a whole entire graphic novel about medieval gay kissing instead of the paper (note that the paper does also include medieval kissing which may or may not be gay)

[reiderwriter]

hi i love your writing

could you do something with reid loving that reader is pregnant. fluff or smut or both

A/N Hello! Thanks for the request! Dad!Spencer is the cutest thing on the planet so this is some unapologetic fluff. And now I have baby fever.

Warnings: mentions of pregnancy, idiots in love. Loosely based on Haley and Hotch's conversation in 1x1. Very fluffy and probably very cheesy and sentimental too... Sorry, you give me girl dad Spencer and suddenly there isn't an impure thought in my head, I just want to lovingly stare at him like I'm the dead wife in an action movie montage.

My requests are open, check out my masterlist for more 🌸

“Okay, what about Amelia?”

“No, Amelia Dyer, Victorian serial killer. She killed multiple infants over a thirty-year period.”

“Okay, okay, how about, Myra?”

“Myra Hindley, she and her partner Ian Brady abducted and killed five children and teens in the early sixties.”

“God, not that then. There can’t be a psychopathic murderer called Belle, right?”

“You’re making this too easy for me, y’know. Belle Gunness, Hell’s Belle, she’s one of the most prolific female serial killers of all time, even 100 years after her supposed death. It’s fascinating, you know, people think that she actually faked her death - when the doctor who performed the postmortem testified, he noted that the cadaver was about five inches shorter and about fifty pounds lighter than Gunness supposedly was….” You raise a single eyebrow at your wonderful husband, and he immediately shuts up.

“I’m rambling aren’t I?” He smiled down at you as you sat curled up as much as you could in your favorite spot on the couch, the cosiest part of your shared apartment. You smiled back up at him as he leaned down for a kiss and you gladly craned your neck up in response, meeting his lips for a sweet moment.

“Hotch was right you know,” you joked when the two of you parted. “All of the best baby names have been taken by serial killers.”

“Yeah, you’d think with the ratio of female to male serial killers, a girl would be easier to name.” He leans down to kiss you again before falling into a crouch next to you, resting his head on your shoulder and placing his hand on your stomach.

“How big did you say our little girl is now?”

“Y/N, you asked me that half an hour ago. I know pregnancy messes with your brain a bit, but if you’re that bad we’re going to have to get you back to Dr Patel and see if you’re doing okay.” He was joking of course, but you showed him your little pout anyway, knowing that he loved seeing the silly expression on your face.

“Humor me, Doctor.” He strokes your stomach and moves away, but not too far away, taking up right next to you on the couch, and pulling your legs over his lap.

“At five months, she’s roughly 10 inches long with a weight of about 0.5-1 pound. But that ‘How Big is My Baby’ book would say that she’s roughly one banana in length.” You giggled up at him and he grabbed your hand and just held it, content to have you in his arms in any way, big or small.

“I can’t believe it’s been five months already,” you giggle as he presses another kiss to your hand.

“I get it. It doesn’t feel quite real yet to me, either. I thought for so long that fatherhood just wasn’t in my future, but you’re the gift that keeps on giving I guess. I don't know what I did to deserve you.” Even if the words weren’t so sweet, with all of the hormones, you would’ve started crying at anything. Or at least that’s what you’re going to tell him when he sees the small tears threatening to drop into enormous loving sobs.

“Spencer Reid, I am not a gift. I am simply the woman with the correct combination of sense and foolish luck that got to marry you.” He’d done this before, and you were used to his small habit of self-deprecating talk, but after a year of marriage and three years of dating before that, you’d managed to work him down to the occasional comment.

“Don’t try to argue about this, I’m definitely the one benefitting the most from the situation right now,” he joked with you, and you could see the genuine adoration shining from behind his eyes. It was a little spark that not many got to see, a glimpse of true happiness in someone usually so reserved.

“Spencer, you’ve given me foot rubs everyday this week, you’ve read more pregnancy and parenting books than every OBGYN and midwife in the area combined, and you’ve somehow attended more of my clinical check-ups than me, and I’m the one whose pregnant.”

“And you’re growing our child inside of you, which is itself more impressive than anything I could ever do with a book and some modern acts of chivalry.”

“Yeah, tell your boss that. I think the only thing keeping Emily from pulling her hair out over your constant absences is that she thinks she’s competing for the title of godmother. She thinks Penelope and JJ are trying to corrupt me with parenting advice and all those baby clothes Pen keeps bringing over.”

“She’s going to be crushed when she remembers we’re not religious, right?”

“Devastated,” the two of you shared a laugh on the couch, and it quickly devolved into a giggle fit after Spencer leaned over and tickled your side. You jolted away from his touch, but he was on you again, attacking your sides with small caresses, and you were gasping for breath between laughs.

“Spence stop- ahh!” Your squeals stopped as you cried out in shock. It was small but you felt something tap against your stomach. Spencer stopped immediately upon seeing your expression change, and a serious look settled on him as he assessed you for any damage.

“What’s wrong? Did I hurt you? Are you in pain anywhere, is the baby okay?” He shot out the questions rapidly, one after the other, barely leaving space to catch his own breath from the laughter of earlier.

It happened again and you put a hand to your stomach, finally realising what’s going on.

“I think I just felt her kick. Spencer, I think I just felt the baby kick.” You couldn’t help the wide grin that spread across your face, as much as you couldn’t help the tear that dropped from your eye as your hand rested against your belly again, scared to move for fear that the baby wouldn’t communicate with you again.

“What? Now? Can I- Can I try and feel it, too?” His hands hesitated at first but when you enthusiastically nodded and used your other hand to put him close to yours, you could feel his eagerness to feel the small kicks of your daughter as well.

Almost as if she was waiting for him, as soon as his hand was in the right position, your little girl kicked again, almost as if screaming “I’m here mommy and daddy,” for the two of you to hear.

“I think she’s trying to tell us not to have fun without her,” Reid whispered in your ear, kissing your tear streaked cheek, and using his free hand to rub them away from the other side of your face.

“I am so thankful everyday for this gift you have given me. And for the record, the gift isn’t the baby. The gift is the overwhelming happiness you bring to my life, and the beauty you make me see in this world. The fact that you’re going to be the mother of my child gives me the confidence to get up and go to work every morning because I know that there is joy and there is kindness and there are beautiful people in this world, and you are one, and she will be, too.”

His attempts to dry your tears are now completely vanquished as you let your emotions run wild, but you almost laugh when you realise that his eyes are just as glassy as yours, and you both sit there, overwhelmed by the pure, unadulterated joy that a small kick from a child who has yet to be given a name has bought you.

[haikyu-mp4]

Snitches

You and Osamu are good cop + bad cop when your daughter acts up, for my Parenting event<3

requested by @nanami2ndbureau. word count; 611 – gn!reader

Let’s just say this situation was not ideal. Not all parents got called into the principal’s office because of their children’s mischief, but you and Osamu sure did. Your teenage daughter was in a bit of a rebellious phase and was seen holding a lit cigarette on school grounds, can you believe it?

The two of you sat on either side of her as the principal detailed the report filled out by the teacher who caught them. You listened intently to the principal while your daughter fiddled with her nails. Osamu had his arms crossed, more focused on your daughter’s reaction.

“We do not condone this behaviour, sir.” You turned the charm on, a soft smile silently begging the principal to show some kindness in the situation. “She has no prior bad marks, who hasn’t tried a cigarette before?”

The principal pursed his lips, looking down at the report to give him a second away from your eyes so he could think. “Well… I would like to know who brought the cigarette onto school grounds.”

You turned to your daughter expectantly. “Go on, tell him you didn’t bring them.” You briefly looked at the principal and added a small comment. “We don’t smoke at home.” Osamu briefly thought of the pack he had in his locker at work, which you knew he used for the occasional smoke break. However, you both agreed he would never bring that habit home.

The teenager crossed her arms, looking a lot like her dad at the moment as she mumbled under her breath. “No way, my friends will get in trouble.”

“He’s giving ya a chance to get out of that trouble, stop being so stubborn.” Osamu’s voice wasn’t quite mean, but it wasn’t nice either. You gave him a look before focusing back on your daughter.

“Everybody makes mistakes, the school just wants to take the right precautions,” you assured her softly, tucking some hair behind her ear. You always insisted she wear it up more to show off her face, but that only seemed to make her more insistent on keeping it down. Teenagers.

Osamu hummed in agreement from her other side. “Tell him who brought it,” he said much more sternly than you did. That’s the moment you realised you were unintentionally doing good cop, bad cop.

“Nu-uh. My lips are sealed.”

Your eyes met Osamu’s over your daughter’s shoulders, and there was no denying you shared this though: That’s right, we didn’t raise no snitch.

Osamu looked at the principal, finally letting his arms fall loose from the tight knot. “This won’t happen again, we promise there will be consequences at home.”

Luckily, the principal let her off with a warning, but she earned a detention for not snitching. Fair enough, you decided. On the way to the car, you told your daughter that you hoped she understood that smoking, especially at her age, can be very dangerous for her health.

“Yes, mom.” She sighed dramatically, glancing at her dad who still hadn’t smiled much. The two of you would probably have a serious conversation about his habit later after your daughter went to bed. “I think you should be proud of me, though. Snitches end up with stitches in ditches, like Uncle ‘Tsumu says!”

“Nu-uh,” Osamu retorted, making you realise where your daughter got that from. “Since when did ya start taking advice from that idiot?”

“I'm going to tell him you said that,” she insisted. You had to look away from them to hide your laugh.

"Oh, so now yer a snitch?"

Sure, parenting can be hard, but at least you chose the best partner to do it with.

masterlist

for the requester: I loved your request, thank you so much<3 hope you like it!

[naughtyneganjdm]

Naughty or Nice - Chapter 4

Summary: Y/N inadvertently gets closer to Negan and his children while also distancing herself further from her family.

Characters: Negan, the reader (OC), Maggie, Glenn, Greene Family, etc.

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51464518/chapters/130908127

Warnings: 18+, Swearing, angst, small amounts of smut, etc.

Notes: Thanks for taking the time to read. If you celebrate today, I hope you have a nice day. This is a gift for you if you are bored and need a distraction as well. I appreciate all of you.

It had been a long time since Negan had felt like a teenage boy in love. Yet, with Y/N sitting over him with her fingers hooked with his while they talked, he felt like he did when he was a kid falling in love with Lucille all over again. Between her laughter and her expressions while she asked questions about his life, Negan found himself absolutely smitten with her.

“Favorite color?” Y/N listed off another question making Negan’s nose wrinkle in amusement. “Come on, you spent forever asking me questions. Now it’s my turn.”

“I know, I know. These are serious fucking questions,” Negan teased her, a rumble of laughter falling from his throat with her fingers hooking tighter with his. “Black or red. Most of my attire is black so it’s probably black, but there is something about red that I like.”

“I feel like I probably knew that answer,” she teased him getting more comfortable over him while they learned things about one another. “Favorite drink?”

“Coke. The soda,” Negan answered her, tipping his head back into the pillows from where they were at. “If I’m trying to be healthy, I’m just going to go with water. The coke just sometimes helps me from smoking. I also live on coffee.”

“What’s your favorite kind of coffee?” she followed up with finding herself smitten with the man beneath her while his thumb stroked at her pulse point.

“I like variety. I just need a lot of caffeine to get me through,” Negan informed her with a loud sigh. “I pretty much live on coffee, Coca-Cola and cigarettes. Candy sometimes too.”

“Sounds extreme,” she teased him, bobbing her head when Negan shrugged his shoulders. “Are the cigarettes a stress relief for you?”

“I tried to stop. I really did, but it’s hard,” Negan answered with a long sigh, his dimples sinking in when he thought about all the times he tried to stop in the past for his kids and Lucille. “It’s really the only bad thing I do. Well…for the most part. I tried, but nothing works. It was a bad habit I started in high school and it just never left me.”

“I see,” she hummed adjusting her positioning over him. “What about your favorite food?”

“That kind of switches up too,” Negan knew that he wasn’t giving her the best answers, but they were the most truthful. “I enjoy pizza, hot dogs…occasionally I’m in the mood for some good sushi. I do enjoy lobster rolls when I get the chance to have them.”

“A man of taste,” she snickered leaning down enough to steal a quick kiss from his lips that had him humming out. “Was Lucille the first woman you slept with?”

“She was,” Negan responded against her lips, pulling back enough so that his big eyes were locked with hers. “We were teenagers. Madly in love. And then we kind of fell apart, but time always brought me back to her. What about you? Was Glenn your first?”

“God no,” she snickered, her eyes turning somewhat serious while she thought about the question. “I never found something like what you had with Lucille. So it always makes me happy to hear about things like that. I’m just sad about what happened to her.”

“That’s not your fault,” Negan’s eyebrows furrowed, his lips parting when he thought about Lucille. “No one ever expects to get cancer. Unfortunately, it was pancreatic cancer and it happened so fast. We were told the survival rate was really low, but I was hoping because Lucille was the strongest woman I ever knew she would be able to beat it. I prayed a lot. More than I ever had in my life. It really just taught me to appreciate every moment we have in this life because we don’t know how much time we have left. Because eventually, if you don’t, you find yourself missing out on the things that you could have had all along.”

“Jesus,” she frowned, a lump growing in her throat hearing Negan’s confession to her about his wife. Loosening her fingers with one of his hands, she extended her hand out to sweep in over his cheek in a tender caress. “I’m so sorry.”

“Me too,” Negan whispered, turning into her hand to press a kiss over the inside of her palm. “I think you two would have gotten along very well. She was awesome. Your personalities from what I’ve learned about you are a lot alike. Just two really incredible, badass women that know their worth and just light up a room when they are in it.”

Gazing up at the lights that Y/N had put up in the attic for him, Negan pointed toward them and cracked a smile, “Literally.”

“I feel bad that I never took the time to know you. I just thought you were this guy that hated me because I took the job that you wanted,” she brushed her fingers throughout Negan’s hair, her eyes showing the emotion that she felt for him in that moment. “There is so much more to you than what I thought there was.”

“There is still a lot to learn,” Negan used his free hand to reach up to grasp her jaw between his thumb and index finger. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m still an infuriating pain in the ass at times. Don’t think I’m not. I can be the biggest asshole. I have a swearing problem and the humor of a teenage boy. But there are a lot of layers here.”

“No kidding,” she smirked enjoying the way that his thumb caressed over her jawline. Sighing, she lowered down in over Negan and cuddled her head in against his chest. Almost immediately Negan wrapped her up in his arms to hold her, his chin cuddling in over the top of her head. Listening to the sounds of his strong heartbeat, she sighed and bit down on her bottom lip. “Negan? What’s wrong with Maggie?”

“What do you mean?” Negan’s fingers caressed up and over the lengths of her back, leading to her neck while she got comfortable over him.

“Maggie was always the perfect one. Everyone loved Maggie. Everyone,” she educated Negan about the past with her sister. “I never hated Maggie, she really was the whole package. Beautiful, outgoing, charming…”

“I don’t think there is anything wrong with Maggie,” Negan began, a loud exhale falling from his throat when the idea of his girlfriend was fresh on the mind. “Maggie is beautiful and there are a lot of good things about her. I just…when you know, you know. And I never felt that spark with her. I enjoy having her around, but I know it’s more so a case of I like not feeling lonely. I love Maggie, but I’m not in love with Maggie. I know that sounds awful. It’s just there are some people you connect with, but not in a way where you feel like you are meant to be with that person.”

“And why do you think I’m that person?” she leaned back, pressing her hand in over his chest to steal a look up at him. All of this perplexed her. When it came to it, anyone in her life that knew both her and Maggie always picked Maggie. “You’re so convinced that there is something here.”

“Because last night, I felt that spark. Fuck, it hit me like a bag of bricks,” Negan responded, his fingers sweeping in over the side of her face. Everything he said seemed so sincere and it took her breath away. No one in her life really ever said the things to her that Negan was saying. “When you meet that person, you feel physical pain when you’re not with them. After you walked out of that car, I was in pain because I knew that I wasn’t going to be able to see you. When you texted me last night, I was smiling so much that Beau asked me if something good happened at work because I looked happier than I usually did. Most of my life, I put on this fake smile,” Negan flashed the charming, bright smile that he always had on his face before exhaling and shaking his head, “but it’s usually fake. It’s a façade. I hide my pain behind these fucking dimples and this smile. But last night, it was real. And my boy caught onto it because he is more perceptive than anyone I know. Once you and I connected…I just know this is it.”

“It’s been one day,” she reminded him and he shrugged. It was something she also had to remind herself. Yes, she had known Negan for a few months, but they really hadn’t connected on a personal level until last night.

“I don’t care,” Negan breathed out, his fingers brushing her hair out of her face. “I know how I feel. I know it’s wrong and I feel…bad, but Maggie shouldn’t be with someone that doesn’t feel that special feeling that I’m describing. And I don’t think Glenn deserves to be led on either.”

“Glenn is such a good guy,” she noted, her sigh loud when she laid her head back down over Negan’s chest. “There is nothing wrong with Glenn either. That’s why I always thought the problem was me. Why would I not be satisfied with someone who is perfect?”

“Like I said, someone can be perfect. But that doesn’t mean they are perfect for you,” Negan responded, his heartrate growing faster the more he thought about things. Being with Maggie was Negan settling. And that was not what he deserved in life. “I know it might feel like we’re rushing things here Y/N, but fuck…after how I lost the last person I care about, why would I want to waste any time with someone I feel so strongly for?”

“I’m not supposed to like you like this,” she gasped feeling Negan rolling her over onto her back so that way he could crawl in over her pinning her beneath him. Having Negan’s eyes on hers like they were took her breath away. “Everything says we shouldn’t be together.”

“Yet here we fucking are,” Negan slurred, his fingers curling around the side of her neck and his thumb drawing out over her jawline. “I’ll deal with the repercussions and I will take them head on. Because you…you take my fucking breath away. In all the right ways. Even the first time I saw you…God, you are so fucking beautiful…”

“You and your ridiculous fucking dimples,” she huffed, lifting up to bring them together to eagerly kiss him with all the passion that had been building up between them. Cupping his face in her palms, she knew that every time he opened his mouth, she found herself falling harder and harder for this man. “It’s not fair the way you make me feel.”

“Nothing is ever fair,” Negan groaned when she nibbled at his bottom lip. Hooking his arm around her waist, he brought her up closer to him and softly bucked up against her. “But we have to make the most of things.”

“You’re very persuasive,” she moaned out, lifting her head to see that his hips were rubbing up against her again and again in slow, forward movements. The friction felt incredible having her heart skip a beat. Kisses were pressed down the side of her neck while Negan’s hands started to open her pants up. “It’s probably a bad thing that we can’t keep our hands off each other, Negan.”

“You say it’s a problem, I think it’s a good fucking thing,” Negan growled, tugging the material of her jeans further down her hips while she worked with his pants again to get them open. Hovering his lips over hers and balancing his weight on his hands, he smiled and shook his head. “It means we both like each other a lot. How can that be a problem?”

Scrambling to get his pants down his waist, she gasped when Negan adjusted her body easily on the bed crawling in over her. Her knees were locked with her pants still around them keeping her thighs close together when Negan led his hard cock toward her body. Tracing the tip through her folds had her crying out at the sensation.

“Please…” she begged hearing him snicker in response, his eyelashes fluttered with a wicked smirk tugging at his lips. Tapping the swollen head of his cock against her clitoris had her whimpering and he adjusted his body to move in over her. Right when Negan was about to go forward with what they both wanted, she heard the sound of a car outside. Shoving into Negan, she heard him grunt when he fell off her and onto the ground in a thud. Pulling her pants up, she couldn’t help but laugh that she had managed to knock Negan completely off the bed. Looking down over the side of the bed, she saw that Negan was pulling his pants up his body, his jaw flexing while he stared up at her. “I’m so fucking sorry.”

“You’re stronger than I thought,” Negan pouted lifting his hips up to pull his jeans back up over them. Adjusting, he attempted to press himself back into the tight confines of his jeans, but it was kind of hard with an erection. It hurt, but he knew that the sound of a car definitely meant everyone was home since they were in the middle of nowhere.

“Do you hate me now?” she wondered, her eyebrows bouncing up when Negan got to his knees. That question amused Negan, his snort loud enough for her to hear when he leaned forward. Brushing his lips over hers, Negan let the kiss linger. Every kiss from him took her breath away. A kiss from Negan was one of the most addictive things she had experienced. And that worried her.

“No, but this hurts,” Negan looked down with a huff, standing up from the floor and looking down at the bulge in his pants. Shifting, Negan wiggled his hips and pressed his hand in over his groin to adjust his body. Shaking his head, he knew that it wasn’t working and grumbled under his breath. “Fuck. I need to run and go put cold water or something on this before the kids run in here and make it weird.”

“The kids?” she heard the front door opening of the house. It didn’t give her much time to think before Negan was scrambling down the stairs in attempts to rush to the bathroom before anyone got up here. And it was a good thing he did that. There were footsteps heard almost immediately after she got up from the bed to start going back to putting the decorations on the tree that she had previously started doing for Negan.

“Dad! The food was absolute shit, but they had this pie that was really good, so I got Maggie to buy us a whole pie that…” Beau’s voice was heard as he moved up the steps to Negan’s room, his words coming to a halt when he reached the top of the stairs. “Holy shit.”

“Oh, hey,” Y/N gazed back over her shoulder at Beau who was holding onto a big white box. “Sorry about the food. I could have told you that the food was crap. It’s better in the small town that isn’t far away from here, but you’re right about the pies. They are pretty good.”

“Hey,” Beau didn’t know what to say, eyeing over Y/N while she was in his father’s room setting up some decorations. “Did you do all of this?”

“Uh, yeah,” she spoke up, throwing her hand up in the air to point to the decorations. This was awkward. Not because of Beau, but because her face was flushed over and her heart was hammering in her chest. Thankfully things didn’t get further with Negan because then this would have been really uncomfortable. “I wanted to help your father feel more at home with things.”

“My mom used to do things like this,” Beau informed Y/N finally getting up into the attic with her grasping tightly to the box that he had in his hands. There seemed to be a sense of awe in his eyes while he looked everything over. “Every room in our house was decorated like this. This is really cool. It’s been a while since I’ve seen something like it.”

“It sounds like your mom was a really cool person,” Y/N noted to Negan’s son, her heart racing knowing that she was just in a rather promiscuous position with Beau’s father not much earlier. And now that she was alone with Beau when Negan was downstairs doing God knows what in the bathroom, it made things complicated, but she was doing her best to act normal. “I’m glad that something like this could bring memories of her back for you.”

“Everything reminds me of her it seems. Especially around Christmas,” Beau shrugged his shoulders and moved over to set the pie box down on the table. Moving beside Y/N he looked down at the box of decorations and pointed to them. “You need help?”

“I’d love help,” she responded with a nod of her head, gazing over Negan’s son who seemed excited to be able to do something like this. “Did you and your mom used to do things like this?”

“All the time. She went crazy with decorations, but we loved it. It made everything more magical,” Beau answered her with a bright, vibrant smile that almost matched what she knew was Negan’s. “It’s why I feel bad for Erin. She was really young when my mom passed away, so I don’t know if she will remember the fun that we had. My mom loved Halloween too, so things lingered a little longer than they probably should have, but when it was time for Christmas decorations, there wasn’t a room in the apartment that wasn’t lit up.”

“I understand your mom doing that. I do the same thing, it just makes me feel more at home. Christmas doesn’t really feel like Christmas if your house isn’t covered in copious amounts of decorations,” Y/N muttered hearing Beau snicker and nod his head. “Do you want to decorate the room that you are staying in?”

“Is there stuff to do that?” Beau wondered, his eyes seemingly excited at the idea. “I mean, we would have to do it with Erin’s room too. If you have enough for just one, we can do it for her. She’s younger and it’s more important for her to be able to have something like this.”

“I think we can manage to pull enough together for both of you,” she smirked hearing how eager Negan’s son was to make sure that his younger sister had a good experience. “Are you more of a reindeer guy or a snowman guy? I think we have a lot of decorations with those two things. We can give each room a theme.”

“Probably reindeers,” Beau replied and she gave him a firm nod. Looking around the room, Beau let out a huff and realized that he completely forgot that his father wasn’t even in the room. “Where is my dad?”

“He had to run to the restroom,” Y/N answered, her throat tensing up knowing that Negan was going to be having some issues for a while. Accepting the answer, Beau went back to decorating the tree and she sighed. “You look so much like your dad.”

“Is that a good or bad thing?” Beau’s nose wrinkled and it made her smile. “You might hate my dad, so that’s why I’m asking.”

“It’s a good thing,” she half laughed with a shake of her head. “I don’t dislike your father. At all.”

“Also a good thing,” Beau noted, digging through the box of decorations to see what they had in them. “I look like my dad, Erin looks like my mom. Weird how that works.”

“I’ve never seen your mom,” Y/N realized that Negan had spoken about Lucille, but like he had mentioned last night, she had never made it around to the other side of his desk to actually see the photos that were in Negan’s office.

“I can fix that,” Beau motioned her to wait pulling out his cell phone from his pocket. Holding it up, Beau flashed on the screen to show her the image that was his background photo. It was a family photo that was likely taken in the fall with a younger Beau, Erin with Negan and Lucille.”

“She was beautiful,” Y/N complimented Beau’s mother leaning into get a better look at her. That wasn’t a lie. Lucille was beautiful and you could tell that everyone in the photo was close. It was a sweet moment and their family looked happy back then. Hell, even Negan looked happier back then. “You have some of her features too.”

“Thank you,” Beau sighed pushing his phone back into his pocket. “Is Annette your mother too?”

“She’s my stepmom,” Y/N answered with a nod of her head. “But she’s the only woman that has been in my life, so she is kind of my mother.”

“What happened to your mom?” Beau inquired and the sound of steps were heard. Looking back over her shoulder, Y/N saw that Negan was making his way back up with the two of them.

“She died after giving birth to me,” Y/N informed Beau hearing the loud exhale that fell from Beau’s throat. “I never really knew her. And I don’t really know what she looked like because my father doesn’t have any pictures around. He’s never really been big about showing things to me.”

“I’m sorry,” Beau stood still for a minute, unsure of what to do before stepping forward to give Y/N an unexpected hug. Standing there she lifted her head to look to Negan making sure it was okay. With a nod, Negan stayed back watching her lower her arms to wrap them around Beau to return the gesture. “Your mom is a big part of growing up. I’m sorry you weren’t able to experience that.”

“It’s not your fault,” she stammered, her head lowering with surprise at how sweet Negan’s son was being. Hearing his words drew her eyes to burn and she felt them damp. God, it had been so long since she had even thought about her mother. “I guess I learned to stop thinking about her because of my dad.”

“Your dad should have never done that,” Beau lifted his head, stepping back and away from Y/N. “He should have kept the memory of her alive in your heart. You’re part of her and you always will be. Maybe we can find a photo around here somewhere?”

“Beau?” Negan spoke up and it made Beau look over his shoulder at his father as Negan finally made it up to the top step. Unsure of how Y/N would react to what Beau was saying, Negan was trying to change the subject so she didn’t get hurt from his son’s innocent curiosity. “How’s it going kiddo?”

“I was just helping Y/N finish decorating this tree,” Beau pointed toward the tree and Negan pushed his hands into his pockets. “She said that she would help me decorate my room downstairs and also Erin’s. It will be like when we had Christmas with mom. With all of our rooms decorated.”

“That’s really nice of her,” Negan noted, his eyes connecting with Y/N’s when Beau went back to finishing putting up what he had for the tree. “Where is your little sister?”

“She is downstairs with Maggie and Glenn. I think Maggie wanted to show something to Glenn and she wanted to see too,” Beau waved his hand about in the air after he finished. Going over to the box that he brought for his dad, he handed Negan over the box and smiled. “They have your dinner and Y/N’s dinner downstairs, but I actually got this pie because I really liked it. It was the only thing that was actually good. You both can have some if you want. You should probably eat your dinner before it gets crazy cold.”

“Good idea kiddo,” Negan placed his hand in over the small of Beau’s back to help lead him toward the stairs. After Y/N put a star on top of the tree, she gave a final once over before nodding her head. “Let’s go eat.”

“Sure thing,” she went to follow Beau down the stairs, but Negan stopped her. Leaning in, Negan pressed a drawn out kiss over her cheek, his fingers brushing over her jawline after he pulled back. “What was that for?”

“For being good to my kid,” Negan whispered, his eyebrows bouncing up and his fingers hooking with hers to lead her down the stairs with him. At the bottom of the stairs, Beau was waiting for them and his hazel eyes fell upon the two of them holding hands. Gradually Negan’s fingers slipped from Y/N’s and Beau tipped his head to the side. “Lead the way young man.”

When they made their way downstairs, Glenn and Maggie were standing by the fireplace while Maggie held Erin in her arms. They were enthusiastically talking about something, but Beau was tugging them both toward the kitchen. Stumbling in attempts to catch up with his son, Negan felt Beau urging him down at the kitchen table and he chuckled. Beau did the same with Y/N before bringing them two takeout containers.

“Here is your food,” Beau looked over his shoulder around the kitchen. “Hey Y/N? Do you know where the plates are so I can get all of us a slice of pie?”

“Just let me do that for you kiddo,” she suggested getting up from the table urging Beau to sit at the other side of his father. Negan flipped open his takeout container to see that there were chicken tenders and fries inside.

“Trust me, this looked like it was the best,” Beau tapped the top of the table making Negan smirk when he stole a fry and plopped it into his mouth. Smirking, Beau stared out at Y/N as she moved around the kitchen to her father’s home trying to relearn everything. Sliding in closer to Negan, Beau spoke up in a whisper doing his best to hide his words from Y/N. “She reminds me of mom.”

“Hmm?” Negan looked back over his shoulder to see the way that Y/N was standing at the middle of the kitchen trying to plan out her next move. “Y/N?”

“I mean she probably doesn’t, but when I saw her decorating upstairs it reminded me of mom,” Beau explained, remaining quiet while Y/N moved around the kitchen to grab everything she needed for them to have pie. Y/N set two regular sized plates out for her and Negan for their dinners. Setting out three smaller plates for the pie, she cut a slice for each of them before holding her finger out. “What are you doing?”

“We’re going to need a piece for your sister,” Y/N responded and Beau immediately nudged Negan with his shoulder causing Negan to snicker.

“What?” Negan took another fry and chewed on it slowly when Beau looked excited about something. “What’s going on?”

“Nothing,” Beau rolled his eyes and happily accepted the two plates that Y/N handed him of the pie. After she had everything on the table, Y/N pulled open her box to see that they had gotten her a sandwich of some kind. Negan eyed it over and she held out her box for him to see.

“You want to share?” she offered to him seeing Negan eyeball her food and his. Grabbing half of her sandwich, Negan grabbed half of his chicken tenders and gave them to her for them to share. Holding her finger up she motioned him to wait while she went to go grab ketchup for the fries. An inevitable smile tugged at Negan’s lips while he watched her, but Negan straightened his posture when he noticed that Beau was watching him while he was eating his pie that Y/N had given him. Sharing the small plate of ketchup that Y/N had brought for them, Negan cleared his throat and knew that his son was catching onto things and that wasn’t good.

“You two share meals a lot at work?” Beau interrogated them, poking at his plate with his fork watching both Negan and Y/N go for the sandwich first to eat. Negan looked to Y/N who swallowed down hard and shrugged her shoulders. “I didn’t realize the two of you were so close.”

“Your dad and I just work on a lot of projects together,” Y/N answered back knowing that really didn’t answer Beau’s question. “We’re used to being around one another.”

“Mhmm…” Beau hummed when he took another big bite of the pie that Y/N had brought for him. Beau finished off his pie while Negan and Y/N ate their meals that they were sharing together. Once they made it to their pie, they heard the sound of movement in the kitchen.

“Daddy!” Erin’s voice called out and Negan slid his chair back, his arms holding out for Erin to jump into his arms. Giving his daughter a big hug, Negan nuzzled his nose in against the side of her neck which had her giggling. “I missed you!”

“I missed you too baby girl,” Negan peppered her cheek with kisses before she wiggled out of his arms once Beau motioned her to come take a seat next to him so she could have the pie that Y/N had gotten for her. “Did you two have a good time with Maggie’s family?”

“It was kind of strange,” Beau was honest, his expressive eyebrows bouncing up. “We only knew Maggie there so it was weird being with a group of strangers. Glenn is really nice. And he knows a lot about video games. Him and Maggie seemed to get along well.”

“Oh?” Y/N’s eyebrow arched in curiosity watching Beau help Erin cut up her pie for her to eat.

“Hey, you two are down here,” Maggie’s voice interrupted that thought drawing their attention to the entrance of the kitchen. “I was about to come up and get you Negan.”

“Little man came and grabbed me,” Negan informed Maggie with a mouthful of the last bite of the pie that they had brought home. “You doing good?”

“Yeah. Glenn and I were just talking about that snow globe that I got when I was younger for Christmas,” Maggie turned her attention to Y/N who in return seemed surprised that Maggie was talking to her about something. “I guess Glenn’s family got him the same snow globe. You remember how much I loved that thing?”

“That’s cool,” Y/N offered up a tiny smile, nodding her head. Glenn made his way around the table, his hands squeezing softly over her shoulders. Tipping her head back, Glenn lowered down to press a faint kiss over her lips and it made Negan look down toward his plate with a discomfort flooding his body. “You having a good night honey?”

“Yeah, everyone is really friendly. They are going to watch some movies tonight. Apparently, Hershel takes a projector that he has and uses the whole wall as a screen,” Glenn described what he had learned to Y/N who smirked considering it was her own father that Glenn was talking about. “That should be cool.”

“Yeah, if you want to do that, I think that’s cool,” Y/N lifted her hand to place it in over Glenn’s to give it a supportive squeeze. “I promised Beau that I would help him decorate both his and Erin’s room for Christmas to help them feel at home here. While I do that, you can watch the movies with them if you feel comfortable.”

“Say what?” Erin looked between Beau and Y/N, a crooked smile tugging at her young features. “That sounds fun!”

“That’s very nice of you,” Maggie complimented Y/N on what she had just told them. “Do you need some help?”

“That’s up to you. I know you like movie nights,” Y/N pushed away from the table to look up at her older sister. A long exhale fell from her throat when Maggie reached her hand out and Y/N accepted it, giving it a small squeeze. “I think I can handle these kids. Dad has a lot of the lights still upstairs in the attic. I just ask you to take care of Glenn. Don’t let dad scare him too much.”

“He’s actually been really nice to me,” Glenn claimed with a tiny smile finding relief in knowing that Hershel was treating him good compared to what he had seen with Negan earlier. “I was worried after what he did with Negan, I would be next in the lineup.”

Negan grumbling under his breath had Maggie laughing and she moved around the table to step in behind him. Caressing her hands in over Negan’s shoulders, she slid them down over the center of his chest and leaned down to press a kiss against Negan’s cheek, “It’s okay baby.”

“I don’t know why that man hates me,” Negan frowned knowing that Maggie was Hershel’s favorite, but Hershel never really even knew Negan. So it didn’t make sense for Hershel to hate him so much. “By the end of this trip I’m sure that he will open up to you.”

“Good luck with that,” Beau snickered from where he was sitting and it made Maggie laugh before looking to Beau to hush him. “I’m just saying Maggie. That was intense what happened earlier. Your dad hates my dad and I don’t think that’s changing.”

“You feeling okay after everything?” Maggie questioned, her fingers stroking at the revealed skin over Negan’s chest. “You didn’t get hurt, did you?”

“Thankfully I’m quick on my feet,” Negan responded knowing that while he was a little sore, he didn’t actually get physically hurt. “I think my pride is just down because of the fact I ended up face first in a pile of mud.”

“We all fall sometimes daddy. That’s okay,” Erin suggested and they all knew that Erin was too young to understand that Hershel was purposely trying to hurt Negan earlier. “I’ve done it before too. Sometimes those kind of things just happen,” Negan brought Erin’s hand up to place a delicate kiss over it. “Are we going to watch the movies tonight?”

“I think we need to help Beau and Y/N with the decorations honey,” Negan explained and Y/N shook her head, finishing off the pie that she had. “Are you sure?”

“I can handle it all on my own if all of you want to watch the movie. I don’t mind. I like that stuff,” Y/N offered to decorate the children’s rooms if they wanted to take in the movies that her father would play for Christmas.

“I’d like to help you,” Beau interjected letting them know how he felt about things. “I like doing that kind of stuff. I don’t mind if dad and Erin watch movies with everyone else. I think it would be cool.”

“I’m okay with that,” Y/N looked to Negan for permission who gave her a single nod. “And if you guys get sick of watching the movies, you can always come to help us. What do you think?”

“I think that sounds like a deal,” Negan leaned back toward where Maggie was holding onto him, but he outstretched his hand to place it over Y/N’s hand. Giving Y/N a wink, Negan sighed and pulled his hand back. “Thank you. That’s very nice.”

After they finished with dinner, Y/N made sure that everyone was comfortable before heading back up toward the attic to gather things. Beau followed along with her and he was rather quiet compared to earlier so she hoped he wasn’t getting nervous being around her alone. Beau suggested they do Erin’s room first, so that’s what they did. They put things up quickly before getting to Beau’s room where they seemed to linger a bit.

“What’s your favorite thing about Christmas?” Y/N spoke up and Beau looked over at her surprised that she was trying to make small talk with him. “You have to have a favorite thing, right?”

“I think my favorite things are more so the memories that I have,” Beau answered with a frown while he worked to help put the lights up around the room. “Baking cookies with my parents. Bringing out all of the boxes with my mom to go through things. Just sitting by the fire with my mom and having hot chocolate. Dad coming to get me and Erin when the Christmas presents were under the tree so we could be excited. He always made a big deal about it. They were so much fun.”

“That sounds really nice,” she commented on Beau’s memories seeing the way he took a minute to think about things, his dimples sinking in before smiling. “When I was younger, I was kind of the black sheep of my family. I always dreamt of those Hallmark movie families. You know?”

“I think that was my mom’s goal in life. For us to be like one of those sickeningly loving families,” Beau snickered, turning to face Y/N while she held onto the lights that were in her hands. “All of that sounds cool to me. You know? The small town, going to the events…it was fun. But of course, we lived in New York so we still got to do really cool stuff. All the time. It’s probably cooler than those small-town movies.”

“What do you want to do before Christmas? What would be your ideal list of things to do?” Y/N pushed for an answer seeing the way that Beau tipped his head to the side. Holding her finger up, she set things down on the bed and then moved for the desk to sit down. “Can I use this paper here?”

“Sure?” Beau moved over to the bed to take a seat on the edge of it, his fingers curling around it in curiosity. Y/N seemed to be writing something down and he cleared his throat uneasily. “What are you doing?”

“Give me a list of things you want to do before Christmas and we will try to get them done,” she suggested and it made Beau laugh. “What?”

“You don’t even know me,” Beau reminded her and she shrugged her shoulders. “Why would you do that for me?”

“Why not? I always wanted to have that tight-knit family like those in the movies and you miss doing things with your mom. Let’s make both things happen for us so Christmas can be special for both of us. Obviously, I’m not your mom, but I would like you to have that kind of magic back into your life for the holiday,” she offered and it made Beau’s hazel eyes get big with awe for what she said. “So have at it. Tell me what you want to do.”

“I want to make sugar cookies with Erin. The way that mom used to. Where it was messy and just fun,” Beau listed off the first thing he could think of, his head lowering when he gathered his thoughts and Y/N wrote it down. “I want to go ice skating at night under the stars. I want to go sledding and build a snowman as a family. Do they do events in the nearest small town?”

“They do,” she informed him with a small nod of her head. “They have a big Christmas tree where people get together and sing carols. They have Santa in town with some reindeer that they let the kids see. There is a family that has a farm out here with a lot of woods. They have a mile long walk where the woods is just filled with loads of lights and interactive things to do.”

“Can we do all that?” Beau whispered, his tone unsure and it made her smile faintly before nodding. “Are you sure? It’s not that many days until it’s Christmas.”

“We’ll make it happen,” she assured Beau with a shrug of her shoulders. “They have these really cool shops down at the center of the town where they have a lot of exciting things going on too. It’s not like the shops at Bryant park, but there are some cool interactive activities that you can do along with Erin.”

“That sounds fun,” Beau nodded his head about, rubbing his hands together. “I know it sounds stupid, but I just would do anything to get that kind of happiness that I did when I was with my mom. When it was all of us.”

“I don’t think I’ll ever be able to bring back that joy that you had with your mother here, but if I can do things to make you and your sister happy…to give you some ounce of joy, then it’s worth it to me,” she whispered, lowering down the list that she had written for them. Looking down at the papers, she bit down on her bottom lip and sighed. “You like to paint, right?”

“I do,” Beau responded seeing her writing something else down on the paper that she had for him. “Why?”

“I was just thinking about something that I used to do as a kid. It’s not really a Christmas thing, but it really helped me in my time of sadness while I was stuck here,” she informed Beau, folding the paper up and sliding it into her pocket. “We’re gonna make all of this happen kiddo.”

“Thank you,” Beau gave her a weak smile before they went back to working on the decorations in his room. After a while, Beau stood beside Y/N at the center of his room once they were finished to get a look at everything. “So…you and my dad?”

“What about us?” she muttered, her eyes gazing upon the work that they did together.

“I never realized the two of you were so close,” Beau pointed out, rocking back and forth on his feet when he thought back to seeing the two of them holding hands earlier. Something seemed to change in Y/N’s eyes when Beau mentioned the two of them being close and it intrigued him. “I mean my dad always talked really well about you. Complimented you and your work ethic all the time.”

“I thought your dad hated me for a while,” she stated with a frown knowing that she was ignorant to the way things really were with Negan at first. “I don’t know if he told you, but our boss gave me the job that your dad wanted. A lot. So I thought he might hate me for that.”

“No, I don’t think he hates you,” Beau shook his head, his head tipping back and forth. “Yes, he was really upset when he didn’t get that job, but my dad got over it. I think he knows that he has a good job. That he gets paid well. After my mom, I just don’t think he takes things that deep. There is so much in the world to be upset about. That was not something that was worth ruining his life for.”

“Yeah,” she didn’t know how to respond to Beau so she just nodded her head about. “How do you feel about Maggie?”

“Should I be honest with you?” Beau didn’t know whether to answer her question legitimately or to lie. Hearing her laugh, he shrugged his shoulders and turned toward her. “I think Maggie is nice. But I don’t feel a bond or a connection to her. She’s hard to really click with. I think she gets an idea in her head and she can’t really get it out. Again, she’s really nice and she does good things, but…I don’t know.”

Beau seemed shy when it came to talking about Maggie. Maybe he was afraid of offending Y/N, but he wasn’t upsetting her at all. She just wanted to get a feel for how things were with Maggie and Negan’s son. If Beau loved Maggie, it would have only made her feel worse about what was going on with her and Negan.

“Do you want to go watch movies with your dad and your sister?” Y/N inquired, pointing toward the door that was open, but it was followed up with a sigh. “That’s a no?”

“Can we take another minute to just talk about things?” Beau proposed surprising her that he would want to talk to her. Thinking things over, she grabbed a pencil and one of his drawing pads. When she handed it to him, Beau tipped his head to the side. “What is this?”

“I will sit and talk with you if you draw for me. We’ll do a game. I’ll draw you, you draw me. We’ll pick two Christmas type items to add to the photo. What do you say?” she offered up a sense of something fun to keep Beau interested. It made him laugh, but he pulled his feet up onto the bed and rest back against the headboard. “I’ll give you, reindeers and penguins.”

“Okay. I’ll give you Christmas lights and a Santa hat,” Beau gave her the two items that he thought of first. Starting to sketch something, Beau’s face twisted when he kept looking up at her. “It’s probably not fair that I’m just a beginner and you are the second in charge at your company.”

“That means nothing. Some kids are more talented than I am,” she claimed while she got comfortable in the chair sketching the shape of Beau’s face out. “When did you pick up drawing?”

“I saw my dad doing it all the time and I think I wanted to be like him,” Beau declared thinking about his past of when he started to draw. “Dad would just draw stupid, silly things all the time. Both him and my mom would always put notes in my lunch for school. Other kids would tease me, but it never bothered me. I had parents that loved me and wanted me to know it. I thought that was cool.”

“That’s really sweet,” she found it charming hearing that about both Negan and his late wife. The way that Beau talked about his parents, she could tell that they were both incredibly loving with their children.

“I carry two notes on me. I have one from my dad when I did my first big play where I was the leading role and I have the last letter that my mom ever wrote me,” Beau exhaled loudly making Y/N lift her eyes to stare out at Beau who seemed conflicted with his emotions. “I don’t ever leave home without them.”

“I’m sorry Beau,” she spoke softly and it drew his eyes up from what he was drawing. “I can tell you were really close to your mom. I don’t understand things about this world. You losing your mom…it’s not fair.”

“Just like it’s not fair that your mother was taken away from you,” Beau speculated and it made her stop. It wasn’t often that she got to think about her mother, but on occasions when she did, she did often feel cheated with life. “It’s not your fault Y/N. You’re like me. We’re both broken, but we’re doing our best to make others happy.”

“You sound so much like your father,” she felt like she had been kicked in the gut when those words left Beau’s lips. It made her lower her drawing down and she shook her head. “You’re like a mini version of him.”

Hearing that made Beau lower his drawing pad and he cleared his throat uneasily, “You and dad are closer than people think, aren’t you?”

“I don’t know,” she felt embarrassed that she just blurt that out to Negan’s son damning herself for saying that. “We work together a lot. So I guess we could be viewed as pretty close sometimes.”

“Close enough for my dad to tell you that he was broken? And that you were broken too?” Beau muttered, shifting forward on the bed to stare out at her. There was a silence that surrounded them and Beau sighed. “Maggie doesn’t understand that. You know that?”

“Doesn’t understand what?” she tried to focus on something other than her relationship with Negan when she went back to sketching her drawing of Beau.

“That he’s still broken. My dad needs to be with someone that makes him happy. And it’s not Maggie. I just think he feels like he owes her something. That’s why we are here. He’s afraid that if he turns Maggie away, he’s going to be alone again,” Beau informed Y/N, his throat tensing up and he shook his head. Going back to his drawing, Beau knew it was a lot to put on a stranger but he didn’t often get to talk to someone who knew Maggie as well. “I don’t like Maggie for my dad. They make good friends, but she doesn’t make him happy like my mother did. He hides behind a fake smile. It’s not real. That’s why I don’t get why we’re here with Maggie’s family. It’s not true love like it was with my mom. There is something missing behind his eyes when he’s around her.”

“Have you talked to him about it?” she spoke quietly knowing that they had the door open and she didn’t know if people would be near to hear them.

“I have,” Beau responded with a frown, getting comfortable again. “I know he agrees with me. I just think he’s scared.”

“I understand that,” Y/N thought back on her own engagement. The only reason that she was engaged to Glenn was because she didn’t want to hurt him. Never did she think she would be engaged to Glenn. Like Negan, she just liked having the company. She wasn’t used to nice people and Glenn was very nice. At this point, she knew that she was Glenn’s first big relationship. “Sometimes adults do things because they feel like they must. I think that’s kind of where your dad is.”

“So you agree that him and Maggie shouldn’t be together?” Beau confirmed with her, but that question caught up with her and she didn’t know how to respond. “You don’t have to lie to me Y/N. Your secrets are safe with me.”

“No. I don’t think him and Maggie should be together,” she whispered lowering down the sketch again, her eyes narrowing while she stared out at Beau. “Not with the things that your father has said to me. I agree with you. I don’t think they fit well together.”

“I’m glad I’m not alone,” Beau bobbed his head about before going back to working on the project she gave him. “You’ve already bonded with me more than Maggie has. And I’ve known you for a day.”

“Like you said kid, people like you and me…we just click,” she gave Beau a wink which made him smirk. It took a while before she was done with her drawing and Beau finished not long after. “I’ll show you mine first and then you show me yours?”

Beau gave her a nod, holding his drawing pad close to his chest when she turned her drawing around to show Beau. It looked exactly like Beau, except she drew him with a Santa hat on his head and a necklace that had large bulbs to represent his request of Christmas lights. Sliding closer to the bottom of the bed, Beau couldn’t help but smile.

“Now I feel silly,” Beau turned his drawing around to show that he had drawn her more in a cartoon form wearing reindeer antlers. It was cute, but the first thing that really caught her attention was the penguin character that he had sitting on her shoulder in his drawing. “I could have done realism, but I went with what I was feeling right now. Which I guess was more cartoon like or comic?”

“Beau, it’s me,” she felt happiness sharing this moment with Negan’s son when she reached out for the drawing. Gazing it over, she was in awe of what he had actually done and she shook her head. “I love this. I can keep this?”

“You want it?” Beau was shocked that she wanted the drawing that he had done. “Really?”

“I do,” she watched Beau reach for the drawing pad to carefully pull the sheet of paper out. Going to hand it to her, she shook her head and nodded to it. “Please sign it for me. I want to keep this forever so when you are a big artist, I can say I have one of your originals.”

“Stop,” Beau snickered, his dimples becoming more prominent when he signed his name on the bottom right corner of the drawing. “It’s a silly drawing.”

“That I’m going to cherish,” she clung to the art and saw him nodding toward her paper.

“Can I keep yours?” Beau inquired, his eyebrows bouncing up and she nodded writing something on the drawing before handing it over to him. Reading what she wrote had his features turning very serious before a small smile tugged at his lips. “To Beau, your heart shines brighter than the sun. Never stop being you because you’re one in a million. You’re a shining star in the night sky.”

“I’m lame,” she informed him standing up from the chair that she was seated in, throwing her hands up in the air. “I’m going to go put this in my room so I don’t lose it. And then we should probably go make sure everyone is okay.”

“Yeah,” Beau agreed with her, sitting at the center of his bed when she left his room. Clearing his throat, he folded the drawing up and reached for the wallet that he carried. Putting it in his wallet, he stood up from the bed in time to meet Y/N at the door.

Once they made it downstairs together, they saw that Negan had fallen asleep at his corner of the couch with Erin cuddled into his chest watching the movie that was on the wall with big eyes. Maggie was in the middle talking to Glenn who was sitting at the other end.

“How is it going?” Y/N sat on the arm of the couch, reaching out to caress over Glenn’s shoulders. Her touch made him smile, his head tipping back so he could stare up at her. “Is Maggie treating you good?”

“Yeah, it’s been nice,” Glenn explained, his fingers reaching up to hook with hers. Moving around the couch, Beau knelt down and took a seat in front of the couch resting his head against Negan’s knee. The touch made Negan’s eyes flutter to an open. Lifting his head, Negan saw that it was Beau resting against his knee and he smiled. Brushing his fingers through his son’s hair, Negan got more comfortable cuddling Erin in closer to him. “It’s been a very relaxing day.”

“I’m glad it’s been relaxing for you,” Negan snorted in a whisper from where he was and it made Maggie chuckle. Maggie reached out to brush her fingers through Negan’s somewhat messy hair and she frowned. “I’m exhausted.”

“Once the movie is over, we’ll get all of you to bed. Okay?” Maggie dragged her palm down over the side of Negan’s face. Right now Y/N was actually happy that both Beau and Erin were taking up the space with Negan so Maggie couldn’t cuddle with Negan. Whatever they were watching was near the end, but Negan could barely keep his eyes open. It was actually sweet seeing how tired Negan was for her. By the time the movie reached the end, Erin started poking at her father’s cheek getting his heavy eyelids to open in a sluggish motion. “Movie is over Negan.”

“I know that. I was awake the whole time,” Negan yawned, adjusting on the couch and standing up. Keeping his arm hooked around Erin, he pulled her up with him and then reached for Beau’s hand to help him up from the ground. “Let’s get you guys to bed.”

“We’ll be right up,” Maggie tipped up on her toes to give Negan a quick kiss. When she did it, Negan’s eyes were hooked with Y/N’s showing that he didn’t want to be kissing Maggie. Watching them head up the stairs, Y/N sighed and Maggie nudged her sister. “Did it go well?”

“It did. Which hey, I wanted to talk to you about a few things,” Y/N pulled out the list that she had written down earlier with Beau. Handing over the list to Maggie, she saw that Maggie was reading it over unsure of what it was. “I talked to Beau about the things that he wanted to do before Christmas. You think we can make these things happen?”

“I can’t see why not,” Maggie felt Glenn stepping in beside her to look over the list with Maggie. “Beau told you all of this?”

“He did. I think it’s the best way we can attempt to give him a good Christmas,” Y/N informed her sister, reaching for the list again to put it back into her pocket. “Plus, it gives us something to do. You know? That way we don’t just sit around waiting for dad to come up with something.”

“I agree with you,” Maggie waved her hand about looking in the distance seeing that Hershel was talking with Beth and Annette. “I think it’s a good idea. Just let me say goodnight to dad and then we can all go to bed. I’m tired too.”

“You ready?” Y/N reached for Glenn’s hand. Glenn nodded with a smile, accepting her hand in his when they moved for the stairs. Once they got up them, Y/N stopped when she saw that the door to Erin’s room was open. Inside Negan and Erin were in the bed. Erin was fast asleep laying on Negan’s chest and Negan was already asleep too. There was a book in his hand that he was likely reading before falling asleep and she couldn’t help but laugh. “What did you do to the poor guy?”

“I’d be worn out too if your dad did to me what he did to Negan,” Glenn released an amused sound admitting that he was happy that he wasn’t the target of her father’s anger. Hearing footsteps, Y/N looked back over her shoulder to see that both Maggie and Hershel were headed upstairs together talking. Glenn pointed toward the open-door causing Maggie to stop, letting out an amused exhale when she saw that Negan was crashed with Erin in his arms. “Your boyfriend is out cold.”

“He never sleeps that well,” Maggie noted, resting her shoulder against the doorframe and Hershel stopped to get a look at what everyone was staring at. The way Negan was laying didn’t look all that comfortable, but it was cute. Heavy breaths were falling from his slightly parted lips and it did feel a bit strange that Y/N, Maggie, Glenn and Hershel were all watching him.

“I told you he was fine,” Hershel interrupted the two women who were watching Negan sleeping cuddled up to his daughter. “He should have made it up to his room, but I’m not about to wake him up.”

“He’s probably crashed because of you,” Y/N reminded her father, shooting him a quick glare noticing how close Hershel actually was to her. “Probably had an adrenaline rush when you tried to kill him today.”

“Oh boy, we’re never getting over this one. Are we?” Hershel stepped back, pushing his hands into his pockets and giving a sheepish shrug. “It was just a little joke. That was all.”

“It wouldn’t have been funny if Apollo would have killed him and then you had to explain to his kids how you just killed their father,” Y/N pushed further feeling Maggie placing her hand in over her shoulder to hint that maybe it was time to stop talking. Considering Negan was Maggie’s boyfriend, she should have been just as angry. “You know what? I think I’m going to head to bed. I need some sleep.”

“Good idea,” Hershel piped in and it drew a chill through her spine. Man, her father was capable of bringing out the anger in her. That was for sure. Glenn said his goodbyes to Maggie and Hershel before following her toward her bedroom.

“Hey, are you okay?” Glenn reached for Y/N, his fingers loosely wrapping around her arm to get her to look at him when they stepped before her bedroom. Glenn’s dark eyes seemed worried, his jaw flexing in a nervous fashion. “You’re not mad at me, are you?”

“Why would I be mad at you?” she immediately denied that idea, stepping forward to brush her fingers through Glenn’s dark hair. Hushing him, she feigned a smile and let out a long exhale. Whispering, she stepped in closer to him since Maggie and Hershel were still not far away in the hallway. “You have to understand, there is a lot of things I didn’t tell you about my family. They just make me very uptight and upset.”

“I can see that you had some history with them, but I like them,” Glenn informed her speaking quiet enough for it only to be the two of them that could hear. Hearing that made a lump form in Y/N’s throat and she nodded her head. “I think it’s good for you to be here. I don’t really know what happened between all of you, but I think your family is nice. I like them. Maggie has been really friendly and Hershel just seems rough around the edges.”

“Right,” Y/N swallowed down feeling immediately shut down even though she knew Glenn was just trying to be sweet about things. Glenn always saw the good in things. And this was probably partially Y/N’s fault for not opening up to him about her past with her family. “I guess I should have explained things to you a long time ago. It’s my fault that I didn’t.”

“Come here,” Glenn motioned her into her bedroom so that they could actually talk for a minute. It left her feeling uncomfortable when he pushed the door shut behind him. “I think you’re here for a reason. You want to fix things with your family. You want them to love you and want to be near them. You missed them. I think maybe now is a time to let go of some of the feelings that you have. Start over new. You came here because you wanted these people back in your life.”

“I almost think I came here because I wanted to prove that I could make it without them,” Y/N countered, heading over to her bed to sit down on the edge of it. Even with her response, she could see that it was one that Glenn didn’t approve of. “My father wrote me off completely Glenn. And look what I was able to accomplish.”

“I don’t know Y/N. Life has to be more than just…that,” Glenn sat down beside her on the bed, his hand reaching out to hook his fingers with hers. “I think it would be good for you to connect with your family. Once we get married, it’s going to have to be more than just the two of us, right? If we have a family, you’ll want to have family to be around them. Or else things are going to be really lonely. They already are kind of lonely. My family is so far away. I moved with you because I love you, but I do think family is important. No matter how messed up they are.”

“Right,” she thought about what Glenn was saying and she didn’t know what to say in return. “I love you Glenn, I do, but sometimes I think you only asked me to marry you because I was the first woman you were with.”

“Here we go,” Glenn let out a long breath, reaching up to pinch the bridge of his nose. “I should have never told you that when I was drunk. I can’t believe that I did.”

“It’s not bad that you told me I was the first woman that you were with,” she explained, her fingers hooking tighter around his. “I’m just saying I think sometimes you feel like you have to be a certain way with me because I’m the first big relationship that you had.”

“I wouldn’t have asked you to marry me if I didn’t want to marry you,” Glenn assured her leaning over to press a loving kiss over her cheek. Closing her eyes, she wished that she believed that, but she really didn’t. There was a knock on the door followed by the door opening and Y/N saw Maggie standing before them. “Hey Maggie.”

“Did dad send you?” Y/N almost teased knowing that her father wasn’t very big about having ‘boys’ in the room.

“No, dad went to bed,” Maggie alerted her, pointing back toward the hallway. It made Y/N’s eyebrows bounce up and she laughed. Of course her father didn’t have a problem with Glenn being in her room, but he despised Negan being near Maggie. “I was just wondering if the two of us could talk for a few minutes?”

“I guess that means it’s time for me to go to bed,” Glenn pat Y/N on the knee before standing up. Giving her a wink, he headed for the door and glanced between the two of them. “Good night you two.”

“Night,” Maggie winked closing the door behind him when he left. Standing at the door, there was some awkward tension between the two of them before Maggie headed over to take a seat on the edge of Y/N’s bed. “I guess now would be a good time for me to apologize. We should have been talking. You were living in the same city as me—hell, you were my boyfriend’s boss and I had no clue. I should have never stopped talking to you.”

“I guess that falls on both of us,” Y/N responded when she reached for her pillow to hold it close to her chest. Resting her back against the headboard, Y/N felt guilty knowing that this was Maggie’s attempt at getting them to bond again. “I should have tried keeping a relationship with you and Beth. I was just so upset with dad and I thought everyone took his side.”

“He really was…is hard one you,” Maggie admitted, her green eyes gazing over Y/N. “But look at you! You did what you said you would. You’re a big lady boss in the city. Racking in the money and you proved that your art could make you money. You proved dad wrong.”

“I guess so,” Y/N knew that’s what she wanted her family to see when she got here, but she could tell that her father still thought she was a joke. “Truth be told, I never thought you would leave here. I’m proud of you for moving to New York City. That’s not the Maggie I knew.”

“Well, I wanted to try something new,” Maggie confessed placing her hands back behind her and bracing her weight on her palms. “It was exciting. I met a lot of people. Did a lot of things that I never thought I would. Things I would never tell daddy,” Maggie snickered looking to Y/N with a tip of her head. “And then I met Negan.”

“Yeah? How did you meet him?” Y/N questioned knowing that Negan already told her but she wanted to hear it from Maggie’s perspective.

“It was at a street vendor. I was already having a bad day and he grabbed the drink I was going for when it was the last one. I ripped his head off for it. Horribly. And he laughed at me which infuriated me. I shoved him. Went to sit on the steps of a building near the street vendor like a child. Negan sat down next to me, handed me the drink and a hot dog. Told me I obviously needed the drink more than he did. I think he was on a lunch break. And he didn’t leave. He was sitting there eating his lunch and I chewed him out telling him I didn’t need his charity. He made some smart ass comment and it got under my skin, but I was hungry so I ate what he got me. Afterwards, he got up and said goodbye. I felt bad. Went after him to apologize. We agreed to get dinner at a bar near where we met and well…”

“Well?” Y/N’s eyebrow arched in curiosity and Maggie looked back toward the door.

“I don’t know what it was, but something about Negan intrigued me. We bickered. A lot. But I liked him. So I dragged him into the bathroom at this old bar where we had sex,” Maggie whispered trying to keep her voice down when she turned to face Y/N. “Whatever went wrong that day, it was easy to forget because Negan is…really good at sex. It’s almost infuriating how good he is at it. We were in a bathroom stall and at that point, it was one of the best sexual experiences of my life. I’d had a lot of experiences in the city, but Negan stood out the most. You see Negan…” Maggie stopped herself and her faced flushed over with color, “I shouldn’t tell you that, you work with Negan.”

“Go for it,” Y/N waved her hand up in the air knowing that she was feeling jealous hearing what Maggie was telling her.

“Negan has a really nice dick,” Maggie blurt it out, her eyes getting big when she nodded her head about. “It’s above average. And it’s thicker. I’ve been with guys who had a bigger dick that are very arrogant because of it. They think that just because they have a big dick they are God’s gift to women, when in reality they are just stabbing the hell out of you with that thing and you can’t wait for it to be over. It’s not like that with Negan. As infuriating and annoying as he can be, he knows what he’s doing with it.”

“I would have never guessed it was big,” Y/N lied hearing Maggie laugh in response. Right now Y/N was just doing her best to hide her jealousy. “With the ego on him…”

“I know, you almost think he’s making up for something, but he’s got a reason to have the ego. From his work to his body…he’s impressive,” Maggie explained with a loud sigh, shaking her head in response. “After that night I thought I just had the best one-night stand of my life. But then the two of us just kept running into each other. I don’t even think we agreed to officially date. We were just together all the time. I got a little weirded out when I found out he was a widower with children.”

“Why?” Y/N was curious knowing that Beau and Erin were two things that actually made her more attracted to Negan.

“Because I was having the time of my life. The last thing I wanted was to be tied down with a teenager and a six-year-old,” Maggie reasoned with her sister, curling her arms around her knees. “At that age, both Erin and Beau already had their mind set on how they felt about things. I always thought if I had a family, I would start my own. It took me realizing that life wasn’t slowing down for me to agree that I was okay with Negan’s children. They are good kids. They don’t terrorize me. And they are part of him. I’d be a fool to not want to be with Negan. He’s a pain in the ass, but he’s got a good heart. He’s loving. A good father. He has a good job. If we ever had children ourselves, I know he’d make a good dad. I’m ready to take that jump and get married to him, but I think he’s still stuck on his late wife that died. It makes things a little complicated.”

“I see,” Y/N lowered her eyes, squeezing the pillow in closer to her. Hearing Maggie suggest that she wanted to get married to Negan really upset Y/N. “It sounds like you picked up a real winner with Negan.”

“I guess it depends on who you ask,” Maggie slurred, her head shaking when she let out a nervous laugh. “Here I am talking all about myself. What about you and Glenn? How did you meet Glenn?”

“Uh, he was my pizza delivery guy,” Y/N was honest about her relationship with Glenn. Maggie’s nose wrinkled and amusement flooded her features. “With my job, it’s hard to really have dinner ready so I was ordering pizza, a lot. He was always really sweet and after the first time he delivered the pizza to me, he would keep bringing me little extras. I thought it was charming. And one night it was raining so hard. He was soaked. So I just offered to have him come in and have a piece with me so he could dry off.”

“Did you have sex with him that day?” Maggie pushed and Y/N shook her head. “Come on.”

“I’m sorry. We’re boring,” Y/N suggested with a shrug knowing that her story in comparison to her and Negan’s was really tame. “I asked him out and the first date he showed up with a bunch of roses. It was really sweet. And then I just liked having his company. He’s fun and he’s sweet. It was nice to have a friend around. And then I guess it just grew into more.”

“What about Glenn? How is sex with Glenn?” Maggie questioned and Y/N found herself less inclined to tell her sister about her sex life with Glenn. “Come on. I literally just told you Negan’s dick size.”

“No, you just said he had a big, thick dick,” Y/N countered with a shake of her head. Once she responded that, Maggie threw her hands up in the air to suggest a size before holding her hands up to give a thickness in comparison. It made Y/N shake her head and she lowered her head into her hand. “I have to stare at this man every day of my life Maggie.”

“You’re welcome, now give me the details,” Maggie poked at her sister and it made Y/N feel ridiculous. “What was sex with him like?”

“Honestly Maggie, I was his first,” Y/N explained which was followed by a small snicker from Maggie. “Don’t tell him I told you that. He was really embarrassed. You have to understand that Glenn is very shy. He had no game at all. And I think most women ignored him because of his job, but he was cute. And he was sweet.”

“So he got better with time then,” Maggie noted, pushing into Y/N’s shoulder. “Since when have you been prude about sex details?”

“My whole life? I’m not really comfortable talking to my family about my sex life,” that wasn’t a lie. It was always something that she was uneasy about. “Then again I guess I should have been more open about that whole thing.”

“Here we go,” Maggie frowned, tipping her head to the side. “Is this going to be about Shane?”

“I wasn’t going to go there,” Y/N scoffed shaking her head immediately. “I just meant that maybe the two of us would have been closer if I was more open with you.”

“Good because I don’t want to go back to that,” Maggie threw her hands up in the air, waving them about. “You now have Glenn and I have Negan…”

“Maggie, I thought you didn’t want to talk about it,” Y/N pointed out, lifting her right hand to point her finger at her sister. “Yet you’re going off about it.”

“How was I supposed to know that Shane was the guy that took your virginity Y/N? Like you said, you weren’t very open about things,” Maggie rambled on and it made Y/N roll her eyes before leaning back against the headboard to listen to her sister go off. “Yes, I’m aware that I slept with your boyfriend when we were younger, but you didn’t tell me it was your boyfriend and he really was too old for you at the time. If daddy would have known that Shane was having sex with you, Shane would have gotten in a lot of trouble and you didn’t want that. Not with Shane’s potential football career.”

“I don’t care about Shane,” Y/N contemplated her past knowing that the first man she hooked up with was never good for her in the first place. “Shane got what he wanted. He spent time with me to get close to you. It is what it is.”

“That’s not what you thought back then,” Maggie reminded her sister and Y/N let out a tense sound. “You were so angry with me for the whole Shane thing.”

“My boyfriend dumped me for you,” Y/N threw her hands up in the air and found herself frustrated with her sister. “I was a teen. So yeah, I was upset. Especially since I told you and you kept dating him. And then you only dated him for like two weeks and then you dumped him for that other guy. So Shane was always showing up begging me to talk to you. It was a little overwhelming. But I’m telling you, the last thing I care about right now is Shane. I looked the guy up and he’s a cop somewhere. And the last thing I would want to be with is a cop. Shane was not good for either one of us. I think it’s safe to say that both Negan and Glenn are better than Shane. So seriously…”

“Point taken,” Maggie went silent, her green eyes shifting showing that their discomfort was back between them. “Shane was one of those guys that didn’t know how to have sex anyways. It was fun making out with him, but sex…”

“Maggie, he was the first man I had sex with. I know what sex was like with Shane,” Y/N interrupted her sister not wanting to talk about her ex-lover any longer. “I swear. I’m not mad at you for Shane. Neither one of us lost out when it came to Shane.”

There was a silence that followed again and Y/N looked to the time, “Can we maybe talk about life tomorrow? We can have lunch together, plan our days out with what Beau requested of us and just talk about normal things. Life. Not sex? I just am really tired. I don’t get to sleep a lot.”

“Sure thing,” Maggie stood up from the bed, reaching out to squeeze over Y/N’s shoulder. “I’m glad to see you again sis.”

“Believe it or not Maggie, I’m happy to see you too,” she waved goodbye to her sister finding herself thankful when Maggie finally left. Turning off the lights, she crawled into the bed and wondered if she was doing the right or wrong thing here. Especially after that discussion.

Toward the middle of the night, the sound of her door opening was heard and it woke her from her sleep. Footsteps moved around her room, surprising her when the bed dipped and she let out a nervous sound when someone crawled into the bed beside her.

“Relax boss,” Negan’s deep voice rumbled from behind her, his arm hooking around her waist once he crawled into bed with her. Nuzzling his nose against the back of her neck drew her to let out a long exhale having the warmth of him cuddling her close. At this point she wondered if it was a dream that she was having. Right now, Negan was the only comfort she found in things, so the idea of having him crawl into bed with her to hold her? That sounded like a pretty good dream for her. “I just want to hold you for a while.”

Adjusting her positioning in the bed, she hooked her fingers with Negan’s and cuddled back into him. Knowing that Maggie was sleeping in her old bedroom not far down the hallway did enter her mind when Negan’s deep breathing followed not long after showing that he had fallen asleep. After everything that happened tonight, it just made everything else feel so much more complicated and she hated that.

----

Tags: @slutlanna976 @fuckthis-and-fuckthat @jennydehavilland @de-gabyconamor​ @ibelongtonegan @smallsadjellyfish @labyrinthofheartagrams  @msjamesmarch @thebeautysurrounds @hotfornegan @redmercysugar @caprithebunny @tuttifuckinfruitty @emoryhemsworth @a-girl-interupted @akumune​ @stoneyggirl2 @xsarcasticwriterx  @haleygreen23 @xhannahbananax03 @sanctuaryforthelost​ @burningredaffair @killaweiser @dead-of-niight @ayumi-wolf @hollyismentallyillhelp @promiscuousbarnes​ @tone-stark @lanadelnegan @flippittygibbitts @stickyhuesos

[number-1-kuaidul-fanboy]

What are you main thoughts on arc v and what you like and don’t like about it?

*Cries out in agony*

Okay fine I'll talk about Arc V.

So... I don't know/remember if this has necessarily been a trend on Tumblr the way it has been in my Discord circles but uh... I have a habit of referring to Arc V as my least favourite Yugioh series.

Now let me clarify. By "least favourite" I do not and never have meant "worst". I have stated before that I love every current Yugioh series and believe they all have entertainment value.

Arc V is not a bad series. It has a lot of genuine merit that I would be remiss not to talk about.

That being said, my overview is going to be critical so don't like? Don't read.

1 The duels, even if they were starting to get a little too complicated by this point, are very fun and breathe life into match ups I otherwise wouldn't care for. Looking at the Arc V duels purely based on the cards and plays, I'd say they're a step up from the overly boss monster reliant but otherwise decent Zexal duels and leagues above the slog-fest overly complicated combo ridden duels of VRAINS.

2 The first season of this show is legitimately fantastic. It has some occasional whatever filler episodes here and there but overall it sets up the characters and story really well and is just fun and engaging to watch in general.

3 The way this series depicts the horrors of war, and how it's not necessarily a black and white issue. Arc V takes a more nuanced approach to this and shows characters being groomed or brainwashed into the cause on both sides, not just the fusion dimension. Serena, Sora, Dennis, Reira, even Yuri to an extent that the show didn't show too well- they're all just children forced to fight in a horrible war and Serena, Sora, and Dennis in particular have really interesting arcs and such fun personalities that they are among my favourites in the show.

4 The foreshadowing and ultimate payoff of certain elements is really satisfying and on my first viewing, eclipsed a lot of the problems Arc V had. The show truly does feel grand and epic and the ultimate reveal of the backstory, Zarc and Ray's stories, how the dimensions split, all of that is really well done and interesting and definitely the most interesting parts of the show on rewatches. But... speaking of rewatches...

I'll admit, I really loved Arc V when I first saw it and declared it my second favorite Yugioh series at the time, beating out Zexal and DM but not GX. It was when I rewatched Arc V that the cracks showed and... my god were they big cracks.

Rewatching the Synchro dimension arc after finally watching and liking 5Ds made me notice how much of the unique riding/turbo dueling elements were taken out in favor of just regular dueling on motorcycles with the occasional action card. But that's a small issue compared to how terrible the social commentary aspects were in the Synchro arc, even without comparing it to 5Ds.

Oh Shinji how they dropped the ball with you.

I'll try to keep this brief but I think the fact that the Synchro arc demonized protesters is incredibly disgusting. And sure, you can claim that the protesters weren't demonized specifically for rioting but for wanting to oppress the rich but you know what? Making all of the protesters, who had very valid reasons to protest by the way, out to just be trying to oppress the rich is still disgusting and I hate it. The way the narrative presents it, it really feels to me like this arc ends with Yuya ultimately forcing his "never fight, only pacifism" beliefs onto LEGITIMATELY OPPRESSED PEOPLE WHO WERE FIGHTING FOR THEIR RIGHTS only to be told "no no no, just talk to your oppressors instead!" which historically, DOES NOT WORK and is a disgusting message to perpetuate, even if it wasn't what the show intended. And this Yuya problem of forcing his ideals onto others along with his character development going in circles are things that do not go away after this. It's a problem with the entire show after the first season and the reason I don't really like canon Yuya very much.

All of this, and also Yuzu's character being destroyed, kills that part of the Synchro arc for me, which is a HUGE part, and the fact that very little actually happens to progress the overall plot for this entire THIRD OF THE SHOW is really frustrating. There's some character development here and there, some arcs being less useless than others, but in terms of major events for the overall story, it really feels like the plot just comes to a screeching halt for most of this arc, with the only things that happen being Serena and Yuzu getting kidnapped, Dennis's betrayal, and Sora's honestly kinda rushed but still decent redemption. So nearly an entire third of the show is both a boring or enraging slog AND doesn't further the overall story I was actually interested in. GREAT.

Also I hate Roget. I don't have any deeper analysis there, I just hate his guts and not in a fun love to hate villain way like Amon from GX. I just hate him and wish he wasn't in this show.

So... the first third of Arc V is great and the second third throws a lot of what made that first third great into the garbage and is so frustrating that I've declared it my most hated Yugioh arc in all eight shows so far. So... where does that leave the final third that most people seem to hate?

...to be honest, I'm in a weird middle ground where I find this final section of Arc V to be both underrated and also not very good. It's... a mixed bag. I have a lot of the same problems with it that most do: the way the show dropped the ball with Reira's arc, Leo Akaba getting off scott-free for being a war-mongering genocidal maniac, the non Yuya and Yuzu yu-boys and bracelet girls becoming irrelevant the way they were by the end, Rin and Ruri getting pretty much nothing but macguffin status, the creepy mind control shit in general, the Battle Beast arc. Just. The stupid ass Battle Beast arc.

Fuck this arc.

And I have some problems that I feel might be unique to me but are major all the same: the legacy characters, especially Asuka and Edo, being poorly written with Asuka overshadowing Yuzu then being sidelined and treated horribly in her duel with Yuri (still one of my most hated duels in the entire franchise) and Edo being incredibly inaccurate to and disingenuous of his character in GX with his arc being incredibly rushed and also feeding into that Yuya problem of insisting "pacifism will resolve everything!" that I mentioned earlier which also logically should not have worked on this version Edo.

Basically, I DESPISE these duels:

And on top of all of that, I don't like the Z-Arc duel. It's got some funny moments in the dub and I like the concept of it but it just goes on for way too long. For how many characters butt into this thing and how obvious it is that none of them are gonna win until Reira steps up (shouldn't have been her, should've been the bracelet girls or actually Ray in some form) it goes on for so damn long and it's just not fun. I feel no desire to rewatch this thing.

Soooo why did I say this arc was a mixed bag when I've had so many negative things to say about it? Honestly, it's just a lot more fun to watch than Synchro arc was. There's more variety in locations, it's not a tournament so the match ups are more surprising and varied, and like I said earlier, the pay off to all the foreshadowing, mostly from the first arc, is really strong. The grander story is back in focus and there are more good character moments sprinkled throughout than there were in Synchro arc. I don't care for Kaito that much in Arc V, or even Zexal II for that matter, but his duels are still fun to watch, I particularly enjoy his duel with Dennis, if just for Dennis.

And while I don't like how overly long the Z-Arc duel is, I still enjoy parts of it and the build up to it is genuinely fantastic. Nearly everything that happens from the Z-Arc backstory up through Yuri vs Yuya and all the duels in between are quite possibly the peak of the entire show. Declan standing up to his shitty father and reinforcing his loyalty to and belief in Yuya is amazing and exactly what Revolver's arc in VRAINS should've been, I love Declan and Riley's duel, Yuri gets to be a fun villain for a while before getting discarded, it's all really great stuff. Maybe it's partially my Declan bias, I really love him, he's my favourite character in the show, but these duels are peak.

Also, apart from the stupid aspects of the ending that I already discussed, the last eight episodes are just. Genuinely good in my eyes? People say they bring the plot to a screeching halt but to me, those episodes are an epilogue, and a pretty good one for the characters the show kept around. I unequivocally like the way Dennis's arc wraps up. I like Shun's duel with Yuya. Shun having to accept his sister and best friend are gone but finding happiness in knowing they do still live on in a way is pretty much the only good thing to come out of forcefully fusing the Yu-boys and bracelet girls. Also Jack and Yuya having a goddamn interdimensional turbo duel is still one of the coolest concepts for a duel EVER. And Declan vs Yuya right after it is a really fun duel with a very good emotional core. Still absolutely LOVE that moment of Yuya understanding and sympathizing with Z-Arc. All these parts are a great way to wrap up the series, even if a lot of the stuff around it isn't.

It's definitely an arc, and show for that matter, of peaks and valleys and sadly, a lot of those valleys really aren't worth trudging through to get to the peaks for me. Arc V, to a more major extent than 5Ds, is the kind of show that I don't feel compelled rewatch in its entirety, just the parts I really like (or need to rewatch for writing reasons or something).

So overall I do like Arc V but it is the Yugioh series I have the most problems with.

[writingpencil]

Vicky

It was funny really, Timmy avoiding touching anyone like it would make him sicker than the plague.  It was funny when he jumped out of his skin, getting as far away from the person who touched him as he could. It was funny. Or, at least to Vicky it was. The ruthless redhead would make it her mission to torture Timmy every chance she got. A hug in front of his parents, squeezing him tight like they were sister and brother. Picking him up by his hair, his wrist, his ankle, and throwing him in his room, or a closet, or outside in the rain. The occasional time she forcefully held his hand when they crossed the street. Vicky found this the most funny because, she discovered, the little twerp hated anyone touching his hands the most.

But that was years ago, when she was an evil babysitter, when her anger issues and teenager brain ruled her, and she found herself much more improved. Her meds were keeping her regulated, she found good friends who stuck with her through and through, and she even had herself a squeeze who didn't even look like Chip Skylar. Now twenty-two, Vicky decided she had to make amends with the kids she tormented. Most of them were teenagers, some of them her age, and they still had the most incompetent parents ever. Almost all of the parents were either not home or treated her like an old friend, gladly letting Vicky in with warm smiles and fond memories, served with a side of tea. The trauma in the kids eyes hurt Vicky's heart and most of them ran away, cowering in their rooms. Vicky told their parents she wanted to catch up with the kids, which the parents were so thrilled with. Some even asking for a babysitter, despite their kids being teenagers. Vicky accepted, knowing she was only working part-time at the dentist office. 

It was a slow process. Most kids refusing to even be in the same room as her. Even when Vicky showed she meant no harm, no one trusted her. Vicky understood, even stating none of the children had to forgive her, just that they would hear her apologies out. Most refused this too.

Vicky knew one house wouldn't even humor her. They've seen her abuses over and over again, even laughing about it, but, surely, wisdom comes with age. The nervous redhead took a deep breath, sighing away her worries, and knocked on the front door. When the door opened, she gave her old speech, out of habit that never died.

"Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Turner-" Vicky paused. Instead of the Turners, there was a boy with very dead looking eyes. His bottom half of his hair was white while the rest was black, wearing a bright blue jacket with cartoon jellyfish on it. "Hello, sweetie, does Mr. and Mrs. Turner still live here?"

"Uh, yeah…?" The boy glanced over his shoulder. "Uh, they're�� unavailable right now, sorry."

Vicky wondered if the Turners decided to have another kid. "Okay, well, is Timmy home?"

The boy narrowed his eyes. "Why…?"

"I'm his old babysitter, Vicky-"

The door was slammed in her face. Only to be opened slightly.

"And I came here to-"

Once again, it was slammed shut.

"...apologize…"

Vicky slumped her shoulders, still disappointed despite knowing this would happen. She turned to leave, sighing.

"Vicky?" 

Vicky was surprised, turning back around to see Timmy. He was older, of course, wearing a pink beanie instead of his usual cap. He had a small scar along his lip and piercings. One green, one pink.

"Hi, Timmy-" Vicky smiled. "It's been a while, right, twerp?"

Timmy cringed.

"Uhm, so… may I come in…?"

"No." Timmy crossed his arms. "What do you want?"

"I… wanted to apologize," Vicky said. "I was horrible to you… and there's no excuse to excuse anything I did, nor do I want to give one. I just want you to know, from the bottom of my heart, that I'm sorry."

Timmy paused, unsure what to do. Then, slowly, he nodded. "Uh- thanks- look, this is a bad time so, uh, can you just go-"

There was a small explosion inside the house, shaking the ground with such a force, Vicky fell on her ass. 

"God fucking - Jimmy, I swear to God!" Timmy slammed the door shut. 

Vicky blinked. 

She didn't know what to do. Did she just leave? Surely it was under control? There were other people with Timmy- and he didn't seem scared. 

But when Vicky heard a high pitched scream, she booked it inside and followed it upstairs. She didn't hesitate bursting into Timmy's room, ready to fight anyone who was messing with the kids- only to find no direct threat. Instead, four boys were standing in some sort of circle - more of a triangle, with one tan, blonde boy hiding behind the dead looking boy, scared out of his mind. The only other boy Vicky hasn't seen was the one with the major cow lick hairdo, holding a glowing, ooie-gooie green slime thing.

"Uh…" The cow lick boy said. "Oops?"

"Sorry, sorry, it moved!" Said the tan boy.

"It's okay, S.B-" Dead boy promised, fluffing up tan boy's golden curls. "It's non-toxic. Right, Jimmy?"

The boys bickered but Timmy was the only one who stared at Vicky. There was animalistic fear in his eyes, like a rabbit caught by a hungry, ravaging wolf. It was then, chest heaving in and out, that Timmy's eyes rolled in the back of his head and he collapsed. At once, a green and pink pillow transformed under Timmy, catching him as they screamed his name in panic. 

"Timmy?!" The dead boy dropped to his knees, checking over the unconscious boy. "Hey, hey, breathe… breathe…"

The cow lick boy checked Timmy's pulse. "It's high- help me move him to bed,"

"I got it-" The blonde one was pacing back and forth until he picked up Timmy and set him gently on the bed. "There we go… there we go… oh, Neptune, Timmy-"

The pink and green pillows soon formed into two adult sized people; faeries with little wings and floaty shiny crowns and wands with a star. The others but cow lick got out of the way, allowing the adults to hold Timmy's hands.

"C'mon, sport…" The pink lady said, her wings fluttering in worry. "You've given us all a scare, time to wake up now…"

The green man was already sobbing. 

"Guys." Cow lick huffed. "He will be fine. His cardiovascular muscle is overreacting with a sudden shock to his frontal lobe-"

"Speak English!" The green man cried.

"He's having a panic attack and the sudden lack of oxygen caused him to pass out." Cow lick clarified, then looked over at Vicky. "Because of you."

"Wait-" Vicky took a step back. "I- I didn't mean to- I heard screaming-"

"Oh Neptune, th-that was my fault," The blonde raised his hand. "Hi, I'm Spongebob…"

"Hi, I'm-"

"Vicky." 

The pink lady and the green man stood up at once, realizing who was in the room. They brandished their wands and stepped in front of the boys.

"Stay back, boys," Said the pink lady.

"Yeah!" Followed the green man. "She's a real bully!"

Vicky held up her hands in defense. "Wait, wait, wait, I'm not anymore! I came to apologize and I was worried- I didn't mean to cause any of this!-"

"We don't believe you!" Green man shouted.

"You tormented Timmy and other children relentlessly for years!" Pink lady was shaking. "Give us one good reason to not blast you right here and now!"

"I just wanted to apologize!"

Sparkling magic swirled from the stars and Vicky braved herself for impact.

"She's telling the truth." 

The faeries paused and glanced over at the dead boy. 

"Danny…" The pink lady looked unconvinced. "Are you sure?"

Danny nodded, his eyes glowing a soft green. "One-hundred percent."

The faeries slowly backed off.

"If she gets even an inch from Timmy," The pink lady warned. "I will not hesitate."

"Yeah! We're godparents!" The green man's wing fluttered, agitated. 

Vicky stayed by the door, hugging herself. Spongebob was the only one not afraid to approach her.

He smiled, revealing his tooth gap. "So, I'm Spongebob, I've heard so much about you! Over there is Jimmy, then Danny, and the faeries are Cosmo and Wanda! And you know Timmy…"

"Hi," Vicky said. "I'm Vicky…"

[snaggie-t00th]

HALLO :D

i do apologize that i didn't have a snippet out like i wanted but, compromise, here's the whole damn thing. i also switched some stuff around in ch2 for continuity reasons :3

i got very very busy with prepping for an art faire (if anyone knows where to get cheap high quality prints let a mf know PLSSS) and i was muy busy. but we're back. and echo's a sweet dork.

mando'a translations!

ke'pare - wait/hold on

ge'tal - red

vor'e - thanks

udesii - chill out/its okay

gender neutral pronouns, no y/n usage, only main descriptor im sticking to about the reader is that you're ginger. cus i am. sorry nerds.

-immediately follows the events of the preceding chapter-

You were fighting back a smile. You had no idea that some of the clones knew Mando’a, let alone that the Mandolorian-adoptee turned clone-donor Jango Fett was taught during his short time on your home planet. You wondered if it was something the Kaminoans decided or if they all went about teaching themselves in Jango’s honor. The idea of a bunch of clone soldiers sitting around a Mando’a children’s dictionary makes the smile stitching onto your face that much harder to fight.

“I’m sorry about Tech. He can be, ah, a lot.” Echo grimaced while swiveling around the copilot’s seat, presenting it to you.

You obliged, and sat down. “Oh he’s fine. There’s plenty of topics I could infodump about, just as annoyingly. I just have a bad habit of my thoughts becoming verbal.” You shook your head, soft auburn tresses flicking about. The lights from the cockpit glinted around the natural highlights of your hair, and it didn’t escape Echo’s gaze.

The man cleared his throat. “Still, I appreciate you being so accommodating of my brothers. Nat-borns don’t seem to get it, you know?”

You furrowed your brow and cocked your head slightly to the left, looking him in the eyes. While he didn’t physically shudder, you could see the slight panic pulse in his iris when you met his gaze.

“Where do you think clones get their camaraderie and brotherhood from?”

Echo shrugged. “Kaminoans, I presume?”

You barked a laugh. “Well, yes. Ke’pare, what did they tell you guys about Mandalore?”

“Not much. Jango was around for the first few years, but I rarely saw him. He didn’t seem to hold much emotion for the regs. He seemed to like the higher ups, but I didn’t become an ARC Trooper until I was shipped off that wet rock.” Echo finally slumped into his chair opposing you. As he spoke, he slowly relaxed into his seat, his hinges quietly scraping together as he moved. Once again his amber eyes met yours, a new twinkle seeming to arrive.

“You know more than you let on, ge’tal.” Echo said, narrowing his gaze.

He seemed to be sizing you up. Trying to parse out his next line of questioning. Truthfully, you were better at it than him. While his observation skills have been battle-tested, the ease in which you peppered questions at him showed years of practice he was simply unable to acquire. Outside of the occasional conversation at 79’s or a senator he was required to escort, Echo’s entire social sphere only extends to his brothers. You made him nervous. In a very good way.

You blushed at the newly acquired nickname. “I prefer to call it ‘not showing my full hand’, but I’ll slide a few cards your way since you seem cute.”

The back of Echo’s neck started to bloom a soft red. He rubbed a palm on his knee, mindlessly self soothing. “Seem? What, the gray skin and hollow cheeks not working their magic?” He joked, gesturing to each feature respectively with a pointed index finger.

“You seem to deflect compliments because you can’t believe them, so I was starting small.” You extended your own index finger and poked at his shoulder, annunciating the seem.

The now-scarlet tint of Echo’s neck began to creep towards his face. Eyes darting towards the floor, he opened his mouth to speak, but closed it. He pressed his lips together for a moment. The only thing he got out was a weak “Vor’e.”

“Udesii. I came here, didn’t I?” Your face softened. Echo’s almost immediate vulnerability around you made your knees feel like jelly, and you were sending a silent prayer somewhere that you were both sitting down. “You’re not gonna scare me off, but you can’t immediately go cracking jokes just ‘cus I said you’re handsome.” You continued. Soft, yet firm. You weren’t allowing Echo to talk poorly of himself, even in jest.

Echo nodded, meeting your gaze once more. He looked off for a moment, seemingly in thought, before returning your gaze and asking softly: “How do you always know what to say?”

You let out one quick heh. “Since I found someone to give the words to.” You reply cheekily.

Echo smiled once more and dipped his head. “Walked into that one huh?”

You both smiled, and a comfortable silence began to envelope the two of you. Both of you were looking out on the horizon. The sky was a deep pink and purple haze, stippled with the indigo hues of the impending twilight. Echo was scanning the distance, as if anything alive would be out there, let alone a threat. You were content watching the 2 ½ clouds in the sky move millimeters at a time, but something told you to look at your companion. Gazing at him, your eyes slowly roved up his face. His jaw was set in a defined line, lightly gritted in concentration. His cheeks were hollow, but his cheekbones sat quite prominently, catching the light. This, juxtaposed with his deep set eyes, allowed the light to dance right at the forefront of his face. As if a candle was eye level with him, across the room.

“See anything cool?” You finally speak, hoping Echo didn’t catch you staring.

“Nah, perimeter check. I’m sure all I’ll see is bones and dirt but, old habits die hard.” He replied, not looking away. After a beat, he nodded, and seemingly relaxed the scrutinous gaze he had moments ago.

“Huh. So, what makes your squad different from the other clones, other than haircuts, tattoos, and builds?” You change the subject.

“Being experimental meant the Kaminoans could enhance certain characteristics. Wrecker’s strength, Tech’s smarts, Crosshair’s accuracy, and Hunter’s senses.” Echo spun his chair to face you and threw one leg over the other.

“Huh.” You think for a moment before replying. “So you think Hunter heard us approach?”

Echo nodded. “And I’m willing to bet he’s going to call me a serf for the next 3 rotations.”

You barked out a laugh before realizing his implication. A hand shot over your mouth and your eyes grew wide.

The man laughed. “Just be glad he’s not close enough to hear your heartbeat.”

“What CAN’T he hear?” You said, mildly exasperated. “How do you get any privacy?”

“He’s got noise canceling headphones but that’s mainly for his own sanity. Wrecker got them for him after his snoring kept him up for 3 days in a row.” You laughed at that, and Echo felt a twinge of pride before continuing. “He showed up in the cockpit one morning with his bandana over his nose and Omega had to ask him about his new fashion choices.”

You let out a series of giggles at that, holding your stomach slightly as you lean forward into it. If your eyes weren’t scrunched shut, you would’ve seen Echo’s face bloom in 4 different shades of pink. Every single part of him was committing this to memory. The way your eyes crinkled at the sides. The way your cheeks almost wanted to push your eyes out of their sockets. He never wanted this to end, the sounds of your joy echoing across the hold of the Marauder.

——————

Hours had passed, the sun well below the horizon by this hour. The sky was peppered with numerous constellations and star systems, the names of which always seeming to escape you. The deep blue sea of sky felt more vast than ever in your little perch aboard the Marauder.

You and Echo went back and forth, sharing tidbits from your respective lives up until this point. You learned about the Rishi Moon incident that gave Echo his ARC status, he learned about the Siege that gave way to your arrival here. He told you about the Domino Squad, you told him about your own clan’s untimely demise. Hours of stories shared back and forth, as if you were both once stationed on the same battlefield and then whisked away, only to be brought back together once more after all these years. But there was no mutual history to draw upon this familiarity from. The two of you just fell into a steady rhythm. One that you’d individually practiced and honed for years, like a song that was never intended for a duet, only for the two to sound identical.

“...And that’s where I learned Keldabe Handshakes are applicable as a neutralizing tactic across species.” You finished, explaining the first and only time a Shriek-Hawk has successfully taken you off guard.

“Charming.” A voice hissed, and then a pair of boots dropped to the ground with a soft thunk. “Echo, shouldn't you be putting your toys away? It’s late.” Crosshair slunked into the cockpit, seemingly from the shadows. You scoffed and rolled your eyes. “I must be a pretty expensive toy to trade for speeder brakes.”

“I can’t say I’m surprised you’ve never been with someone and lost track of time, Cross. That does tend to require social skills and, y’know, liking people?” Echo crossed his arms and stared his brother down.

“Well unless they’re taking your bunk, you should tell Tech someone’s joining him in the cockpit tonight. It’s too late to take them back now.” Crosshair seemed to spit the last part of the sentence, annoyed that someone else is in his space and bothering his brothers. While you understood hesitancy, you felt as if he reveled in his current position rather than proceeding with caution.

Echo turned to you and looked into your eyes softly. “It’s up to you.”

“I’m already cramping an already small ship. I can kick it up here with Tech for the night.” You said, smiling. While you very badly wanted to just crawl into Echo’s bunk with him, you weren’t doing that the first day. Plus, you don’t know how Echo feels about his personal space, or his sleeping positions, or if he prefers one side of the b—

“How touching.” Crosshair cut off your thoughts with the remark. He spun on his heel, and disappeared just as quickly as he appeared. Echo sneered at the doorway.

“Are you sure? I don’t mind sleeping up here. Like I said, Tech can be a lot sometimes.” Echo looked back at you, eyes full of worry.

“Tell you what, I’ll come get you if he’s being too much and we can switch, okay?” You compromise, getting the understanding that Echo’s going to worry either way.

“Deal.” Echo said firmly with a nod, and stands up. “For as much of a dick as he is, Crosshair’s right, it is rather late.” You nod and shrug slightly in agreement.

Echo turns to you and leans down. “Try and get some rest.” He gives you a quick peck on the cheek before turning on his heel and borderline speeding out of the room.

When the door shuts automatically, you ghost your hand along your cheek, and an uncontrollable smile breaks across your face.

I think he likes me.

[cadaverschaoss]

"I'll sacrifice everything for my family."

"And I mean everything."

Character’s full name:

Kasumi Niragi

Character’s nickname:

Sumi, Kas

Reason for nickname:

Shortened version of her given name

Birth date:

10/10/97

Physical appearance

Age:

25

Eye color:

brown

Distinguishing marks:

small knick in her eyebrow

Hair color:

Black

Hairstyle:

Short and scrappy

Beach Wear:

Games outfit:

Personality

Good personality traits:

loyal determined

Bad personality traits:

chaotic, emotional

Mood character is most often in:

bored

Sense of humor:

ADHD humor

Character’s greatest joy in life:

her brother

Character’s greatest fear:

dying alone

Why?

She believes if she dies alone then no one will remember her

What single event would most throw this character’s life into complete turmoil?

Finding her biological father

Character is most at ease when:

She is around those she trusts and cares for

Most ill at ease when:

She has to get out of her comfort zone

Enraged when:

You try to hurt her brother

Depressed or sad when:

She believes her brother is dead post 10 ❤️ game

Priorities:

Surviving

Life philosophy:

What's the point in living if there are no risks?

If granted one wish, it would be:

For the secret of her mothers affair to never have been revealed

Why?

She wouldn't have had to leave home.

Character’s soft spot:

People giving her small gifts and things and pay attention to when she talks

Is this soft spot obvious to others?

Yes

Greatest strength:

She's very good at reading people

Greatest vulnerability or weakness:

She cares a bit too much about those around her and neglects her own safety

Biggest regret:

Leaving home and leaving just a small note behind

Minor regret:

Getting into fights in school

Biggest accomplishment:

Buying her own apartment at 27

Minor accomplishment:

Finishing highschool online

Past failures he/she would be embarrassed to have people know about:

She once worked as a healthcare telemarketer and accidentally deleted information that ultimately led to an old man's death. It was an honest mistake but she carries the blame anyway.

Why?

She essentially killed a man

Character’s darkest secret:

Read the killing a man bit above

Does anyone else know?

No

Goals

Drives and motivations:

to reunite with her family after the borderlands

Immediate goals:

Survive

Long term goals:

Get a self defense teaching certification

How the character plans to accomplish these goals:

Taking classes

How other characters will be affected:

N/a

Past

Hometown:

N/A

Type of childhood:

Decent until 15

Pets:

A stray black kitten she fed

First memory:

Her earliest memory is her brother make believing a tea party for her just when she was barely able to walk

Most important childhood memory:

When the truth of her parentage was discovered

Why:

She was kicked out of the family home

Childhood hero:

Joan Jett

Dream job:

Rockstar/self defense teacher

Education:

Highschool graduate (barely)

Religion:

N/a

Finances: lower middle class

Present

Current location:

Shibuya

Currently living with:

Alone

Pets:

N/a

Religion:

N/a

Occupation:

bartender

Finances:

Lower middle class

Family

Mother:

N/a

Relationship with her:

Strained

Father:

n/a

Relationship with him:

Nonexistent

Siblings:

Sugura Niragi, Nisha Niragi (@thepsychosister )

Relationship with them:

Strained, close but strained

Spouse:

N/a

Relationship with him/her:

N/a

Children:

N/a

Relationship with them:

N/a

Other important family members:

N/a

Favorites

Color:

burgundy

Least favorite color:

electric blue

Music:

rock

Food:

hotpot

Literature:

Manga

Form of entertainment:

Tv

Expressions:

N/a

Mode of transportation:

Motorbike

Most prized possession:

Her motorbike

Habits

Hobbies:

Fighting, bartending

Plays a musical instrument?

No

Plays a sport?

No

How he/she would spend a rainy day:

Watching Netflix

Spending habits:

lives within her means

Smokes:

Occasionally

Drinks:

Yes

Other drugs:

Occasional weed use

Old bio:

Kasumi was the product of their mother having an affair, always feeling like the oddball in the family growing up. Her mother doted her with attention in the beginning then leaving Kasumi to wonder what she had done to lose her mother's love, during this time of inner turmoil she started to purposely get in trouble, eventually meeting delinquents , and later being invited to join their gang. To keep her gang life a secret from her family she worked hard at school, until her first week of highschool when she got into a fight that hospitalized two kids, the two boys who she found out were bullying her only siblings. The day she got kicked out of school was the same day she found out the circumstances of her birth and kicked out of the family home. She stayed with friends here and there before securing herself a cheap apartment in Tokyo, she had planned to find her brother and explain why she left their family so abruptly but never had the time. It wasn't until she woke up in the borderlands that the realization hit her, it wasn't until her first few games that she might actually die before seeing her only family again.

[another-corpo-rat]

Fem V Friday but I didn’t take any screenshots of my baby recently so I’m gonna ramble about her soap opera of a life instead.

(Putting the majority of it under a Read More because I know I ramble and don’t wanna clog the tags)

- Victoria was born in Night City but she wasn't raised there - she lived in England with her mother until she was 23, when they both moved for work-related reasons. Her accent is still quite prominent and it's common enough to hear other people refer to her as Mary Poppins. Angelo once called her it in the middle of an argument and she proceeded to beat him with an umbrella. It sounds funnier than it was - it was severe enough that Trauma Team were alerted.

This event, causing an embarrassment for their parents, was what spurred the two into a different approach - small competitions, bets. Harmless to the duo and their parents reputations, not so much for the mercs they moved like chess pieces to up each other. This 'truce' would be in place until their father's health took a severe decline and the question of inheritance became prominent.

- Doesn't really participate much within the commonly tight-knit netrunner community. At most, some may recognise the username V1P3R in certain forums, usually ones theory-crafting potential new daemons and quickhacks - what would need to be targeted in the system to get x result and so forth. One time she asked for advice about what cyberdeck she should invest in, knowing full well it would start a war between the Netdriver and the Rippler girlies. (She herself uses the Netdriver Mk.5, and has a bad habit of overclocking it to increase upload speeds; burning up the cyberdeck and giving her the nosebleed of the century.)

- That said, the quickhacks are more a hobby, something she picks away at when she needs to stop actively thinking about the big work project: a new virus named OIZYS that she is heading the development of for Arasaka. Secret to the point that even Adam Smasher knowing of it was considered a security breach.

I want to ramble about the idea for it, so -- OIZYS can lie dormant for some time once uploaded, not affecting the target in any way nor showing up in most scans until they encounter something that sets off their threat/fear response. Victoria is trying to find a way for them to activate it remotely, but her experiments in that regard haven't worked thus far and she refuses to consider the project complete or even viable if their targets getting scared by their own children jumping out at them can trigger it.

OIZYS would kick in during that response in the brain: overwhelming the amygdala with stimuli and convincing the individual that they are surrounded by threats even if its not the case, blinding them to the difference between friend and foe. It's results have been comparable to cyberpsychosis and are increasingly effective when the target is in an already stressful environment or position. After the initial, typically violent outburst test subjects showed an increased paranoia that led to them refusing to eat or sleep. The reason for its development is simple: cause political rivals/public figureheads to make a fool of themselves in the public eye, tanking stock and trust in rival companies. So they kinda need to be able to control when the virus kicks in.

While not intended, OIZYS focus on the brain also makes it somewhat effective against cyborgs - noted to occasionally trigger a disconnect between the biopod and conversion frame. Those results have been kept quiet from a certain tinman and have been struck from any official documentation.

- She used to be engaged to an Arasaka security agent, Marcus Larson (seen below). However, their relationship was tenuous at best and wouldn't last due to his aggression and her frequent infidelity and gaslighting. Marcus broke off the engagement following Victoria's assignment to Adam Smasher, after she told him to go fuck himself when he demanded she refuse the transfer. Ever spiteful, Victoria has maintained a fairly good relationship with his mother and sister - who still consider her part of the family even if she didn't marry into it. Her not-nephews prefer her over Marcus, courtesy of her spoiling them rotten. She's never considered herself an actress, but she plays the part of doting aunt well.

- Owned a Quadra Type-66 Avenger. When her half-brother bombed it in an attempt on her life, Victoria was initially more pissed about the destruction of the car than the half-assed murder attempt. That Angelo killed himself shortly after this attempt was surely just a coincidence, and not at all tied to his netrunner sibling who is known to keep fatal quickhacks in her arsenal.

- There was an investigation into Angelo's death; headed by a certain Detective Ward. River could smell there was something off about the whole thing, and while the pettiness of getting fixers and mercs involved is commonplace among self-important Corpos, the timeline of events was too suspect for him to just write it off as a suicide. (A dying rich father, half-siblings known to hate each other, a failed car bombing and then a suicide? Yeah. He wasn't believing what Victoria fed them: that Angelo was paranoid after her car exploded, worried he was next. His suspicions grew tenfold after learning she was a netrunner.) However, all of that was circumstantial and while he might have been able to hold it against a common citizen of Night City; a suit was nigh untouchable without something solid.

Victoria was NOT happy when she was taken in for questioning, a colleague of River's tried to soothe her ruffled feathers by explaining that River was on edge due to a personal circumstance (the disappearance of Randy) however they had instead just given her a means to antagonize the man. And she did, accusing him of being a shit brother and uncle without explicitly saying it. River was so fucking close to clocking her, frustrated af knowing his hands were tied and he had nothing that would stick if he kept to official channels. Watching her walk out added to his quickly building grievances with the force.

- Due to her mother's ailing health, Victoria oversaw the burials of both her father and half-brother. Their niches read the following:

Joseph Benjamin Morris-Crane A waste of space even in a box

Angelo Victor Morris Finally knows something we don't

[awakened-human-design]

I WAS A MILLENIAL ON A SPIRITUAL QUEST

How would you like to get started on learning Human Design?

????? what the heck is that ??????

My Story

In December 2017, I was on a call with one of my teachers from the group Trillium Awakening. They asked me for my birthday, time and place of birth, and sent me my Human Design body graph. They talked about how I was a projector, and they were too, how it was a rare type, and that I had a lot of open centers, meaning, I was really open to conditioning from the outside world.

They suggested I check it out and some of its free resources. A small tool too accelerate my spiritual process. Which, by the way, could take up to 7 years.

I *WAS* A 20?Something ON A SPIRITUAL QUEST: 

THE VICTIM STORY

Yikes! This is cool, but heck if I had the time or money for more of that!

I hardly had enough money to pay for our weekly group calls in a women’s circle - that put a price beyond compare - but stretched me, even at the discounted rate they offered.

No one in my family had put money into spiritual or personal development work, while I was knee-deep in the stuff. To be honest, I didn’t really feel like I had a choice.

Doing work on spiritual development was a choice between “This stuff is so expensive. If I do this I won’t have any money and I will die” and “This stuff is absolutely what I need at this point in my life and that the world needs to evolve so if I don’t do this…I will also die.”

So? It was, as one of my teacher’s Marc Gafni would call, an erotic double-bind.

I made the choice to go knee-deep in work towards spiritual evolution.

I left the teaching world and I worked in the “gig economy.”

My resume had 5 different education companies.

I worked between 1-40 hours a week, and spent half of it driving.

For months at a time I did what I loved - working with kids - and had no “boss” to call me to the office.

Sounds good, right?

Finally free from educational institutions, I saw how life really worked in people’s homes. I saw the truth of District public and charter schools, and, no matter where I went, I taught kids in the way that felt good to me.

Of course, not everything ended well, and some parents and classroom teachers asked me to *get out* on the first day! But…the recognition of my abilities as a teacher *direct* and *instantaneous.* The progress of the children showed in their creativity.

Let’s get real though about this so-called “gig economy” that promised millennials freedom. No boss meant no W-2. No health insurance. No retirement plan. No coffee breaks. No co-workers.

The road was lonely.

Between driving to tutor or babysit kids at their home, substitute teach at a random school in Maryland, or attend a retreat in New Jersey, I started to feel less like a teacher and more like a truck driver. I took up bad habits that I never imagined as a yogi. I ate protein bars with more sugar than a Snickers and smoked the more the occasional American Spirit that even listening to Adi Da podcasts could not save me from.

I felt sad - but who else could see me but myself?

Some of my friends from my “previous life” no longer spoke to me. I felt ashamed I had left the active lifestyle I once had of biking, walking and yoga, but I knew I could not afford it. I paid for retreats by offering to cook batch meals for the sangha.

I lived in a basement apartment in a house owned by an electronic musician that hosted bands from all over the country. My next door neighbor was an indie musician as well with a great wardrobe and occasional clothing swaps with her New Zealand friends. My closest friend made her own jewelry and tye-die. Two blocks away from the thrift store! So… Major perk - getting to listen to and play music on the reg. and get free, cute clothes. Major downside - working all the time with hardly enough cash to pay the rent to show for my good deeds, and sometimes looking “woke up like this” and other time looking like I hadn’t changed out of my pajamas.

OKAY…SO WHAT IS THIS HUMAN DESIGN STUFF AND HOW DID YOU LEARN IT

Okay, cool. So back to the start of the story. My teacher gave me a tool and I don’t think I looked at it for two years.

But then …. the covid, the lockdowns, the confinement , and suddenly we all had no where to go, everywhere to be (on Zoom) and time, too much of it.

How was I ever going to ‘be’ someBODY?

I won’t go into the depth of “the lockdown” story because at this point, we all have one.

But lockdown story did not produce the kind of “free time” that one might really hope for, unless, of course, you enjoy “free time” like a character from a Albert Camus novel.

Coincidantalment**, I spent the entire time of “confinement” in two foreign

No exit. Like - am I ever going to get out of this? Am I ever going to escape this like square box my form is trapped inside of, speaking to people in a language no one understands?

Okay. I am going to revisit this Human Design stuff. I am going to learn a language that describes the programming of the human body.

No, this isn’t some weird genetic altering stuff. Au, the contrarie!

A system of empowerment that came along at the right time.

When we are, as David A Temple puts it posed between utopia and dystopia. We are getting the call to know ourselves - NOW - in a progressively globalizing and demanding world. And not just globalizing in terms of “oh maybe this bag of chips I’m eating right now came from a Uyghur death camp and perhaps its made of sawdust.” Okay…maybe that too…but really…Globalizing in terms of the planet - the “PLAN-(N)ET” - has a plan to catch us and we best follow her word…or…else.

TO POPPY-SEED QUEEN CURING HER ADDICTIONS: A HEROINE’S JOURNEY

So I spent…every day of French class, every morning, looking at the transits (both astro and HD), recording my dreams, reading my graph, reading the Cross of the day, the Gate, drawing the iChing…taking a university-levelcourse on iChing…ok…maybe there was some magic involved…and many sleepless nights…and…yes…going down to the depths of the bottom of the bottom…the rabbit hole…the worm hole…the brain hole…you name it…its the the “dark night of the soul “ and there ain’t no batman to help you sidekick robin so you better be the hero of your own story and save the day.

I can tell you. I’ve been there. There’s no going back. 

…..*di di di di*** the song of “why do I like Human Design so much” ***do do do do**….

1- TRANSPARENT AND EASY AS F**** TO LEARN

I like Human Design because it is a very transparent system. If you’ve gotten a reading in astrology or tarot, the “method” or “magic” is usually a little hidden from the person receiving the reading. This is more “Teach yourself your Self” and a reader is more like a guide.

Like a contractor explaining the blueprint of a house from the day it was built. You might not of had the tools to build the house - but you get it. The plan is clear.

It’s not like Enneagram or Myers-Briggs where you take a quiz and find out a type, only to have it change again half-way through your life. Those tools of human development are well and good (but are subjective), and you should use those too. But that’s not what this is.

This system starts with the objective.

And then you have to test it out.

2 - the 100% USE FOR 100%…KIDS

This system, for as weird as the origin story may appear, was built by a teacher. It was built for children and the generations to come.

Anyone who has ever been a teacher (*and hopefully left the profession because they KNOW how the conditioning is happening) for kids under 7 can SEE how easily children and manipulated and cohereced into a “not-Self” program.

They are literally “programmed” to not-love themselves! The sh*t people are paying beaucoup bucks for to *fix* them later in life!

So let’s cut that s-t out before it beings. Let’s raise a generation of kids who don’t need to go to therapy when they grow up to un-do all the trauma that came from their conditioning.

And for you - “grown up” let’s help you re-parent your inner child.

(People always told me I needed to do that. I had no idea how, or the privilege, I felt, to do it.)

Let’s help you learn to “be alone” with your “Self” as you already are - whole.

3 - IS THIS A RELIgION?

Okay, let’s talk religion - if you grew up Christian (like “me” yay****) confirmed in the Christian church…yadda yadda…you probably have SOME trauma from that stuff. Don’t really care if you go to church every Sunday, are a flat-out atheist or extreme right..some body has GOT to say it…

Everything you have been brought up believe is not the meaning of the Christ.

With a little toe-dipping into esoteric Christianity…

The current image of “Jesus on the Cross” is no more than a sacrificial lamb that has you totally tricked into thinking you need to “die” (to the empire) in order to be “saved.”

No. You are a unique balance of light and dark. Although these do move in the 4 directions, they do not always look like a perfect “cross.” More on that later. 

BUT The beauty of it …is also that THERE IS a cross. And you can understand it. And you can be and become your own Christ. 

Your own Savior. And take back the power into your own life.

I don’t care if you can name me every book of gospel or if you tell me that Jesus was a historical figure or in fact never lived and is a myth in our imagination. Or if Jesus is coming back down from the heavens tomorrow so repent your sinners or oh shit maybe the world really *IS* on fire and maybe the highest court in the land (the UN) and now has “Inner Development Goals” and realizing that maybe infrastructure is not just made of things. It’s made of people. Who hurt. Who feel. Who laugh. Who cry. And is telling people that maybe they should consider working on themselves. 

In other words: It’s not just the third world world that needs supported. 

I’m not even sure if this has everything or nothing to do with a guy named Zeus with a big white beard who lives in the sky (although, I have had a couple teachers with big white beards that could compete quite fairly with Grandaddy Marx see “The Stoa” for reference)…but I do know this has everything to do with YOU and your unfolding FATE and DESTINY to live a radical life among the stars.

 Yeah…there. I said it. 

I’m prothetlytizing on the sidewalk sweeties and its time to convert.

Burn me for it. It’s okay. 

Joan was a 5/1. She dressed up as a boy.

They canonized her has a saint. 

Let’s see what the rest of us can do. 

OKAY….NOW I’M THE BAD GUY BECAUSE…

This knowledge is not free. So I do charge.

It’s an Interior Science. No one will do it for you.

It takes time. You have to test it out for yourself.

Let me ask you this: If you didn’t have a story before…do you have one now?

Try Human Design. 

My Design - A Poem

I’m a Savior, but not a Saint.

But the crisis is urgent. And the task is real.

There’s a Devil in command, and I’ve trained him to be quiet.

Wearing masks, playing charades, yet we know it’s all a game. 

Yes, it’s all an illusion of MAIA. She’s the goddess. The veil of illusion.

She’s written these words and she’s ended my confusion. 

Her values will break you apart and make you whole again.

Come home, and be your Self. No one else will do it for you. 

————-

 ~*~ b3 @uTh3nTiC ~*~

**Spell check (?) You can send me a French dictionary later

***HD uses Kabbalah, iChing, Western Astrology, and the Chakra system.  

**** For the Americans out there, Labour Day in the rest of the world is May 1st

[palettepainter]

Bad Habits

Warning: mentions of smoking

Please note I do not have clear knowledge in how addictions work, this was just an idea I thought was good enough to explore between Chikara and Cementoss. 

This happens BEFORE Chikara and Cementoss are offically together, that’s obvious towards the end of the story but wanted to clarify this at the start to avoid confusion. Also it’s late as of posting this so sorry for any spelling errors I might have missed while proof reading

(My Ectoloader slightly spicy fic is still in the works, so in the meantime have this Chiktoss story to supply you with some MHA content! 

All the Higari children have smoked at some point: Higari smoked once when he was in UA mostly due to peer pressure and hasn’t touched one since, next to him Taiho smokes the least. Chikara and Suru smoke occasionally when work gets stressful and Hono smokes to take his mind of things. Kaigo - their dad - used to be a heavy smoker before he married which was a large contributer to his deteriorating health so Magakure doesn’t like smoking in the house)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“This space free?”

Cementoss hummed and turned his head up, he hadn’t heard anyone approaching until the owner of the voice was only a few feet away. Inside the teachers dorms Higari and rest of his siblings had come down to visit, they would be leaving soon for some kind of outing (Cementoss didn’t know what exactly). But he had excused himself earlier for some peace and quite outside, he wasn’t used to the teachers dorms being so noisy, and he’d always preferred the tranquil moments.

Standing outside the doors to the teachers dorms was one of Higari’s many siblings - the red haired and, to his knowledge, older sister of the two he had

“Sure”

She smiled with a nod and took a seat on the steps outside of the teachers dorms while Cementoss turned his attention back to what had been occupying him moments ago.

It was funny how someone with such large, rough hands could be such a gentle gardener.

He remembered Midnight had laughed when she first found out about his hobby, in good humour apparently, as the next day she’d ask Cementoss if he’d help her restore a rose bush back to health. He hadn’t even known about the rose bush until Midnight had shown it too him just to the right of the building.

Cementoss’s hands gently moulded the soil around the new plant, taking great care to make sure he didn’t break the green steam already sprouting up to the sky-

He stopped all of a sudden when a strong smell hit his nose, if he was in the city, it wouldn’t have bothered him as much. But to smell smoke in an area largely made up of trees: didn’t exactly reassure him

He turned his head - the women behind him exhaled a slow drag of smoke, head leaning back as she watched the cloud of smoke disappear above her. She brought the cigarette back to her lips and Cementoss watched as the end glowed brighter as she inhaled

“...You want one?” She asked, easily blowing the smoke through her nostrils before producing a pack of cigarettes from her pocket and shaking them in Cementoss’s direction.

“Uh-“ Cementoss politely shook his hand “No, I don’t smoke”

She shrugged “Aight” she returned the packet to her pocket. Reaching for the cigarette she pinched it between two fingers and tapped the ash from the end away, Cementoss watched it fall into a small pile on the step

“I thought Higari and the rest of your family didn’t approve of smoking?” He didn’t mean to eavesdrop, he had just happened to walk onto the ground floor and past them at the time in which that topic had come into their conversation, and they happened to be talking loud enough for him to hear. He also could have sworn Higari had strong opinions on it too.

The stranger hummed “..Uh, yeah I guess you could say that” They said casually. Cementoss wasn’t sure, but he was certain there was a hint of hesitance, as thought they were shy to admit he was right

Cementoss hummed, eyeing the cigarette in her hand “..You know smoking is bad for you right?”

They paused mid reach to return their cigarette to their lips, she looked to Cementoss who stared back calmly.

The silence was broken when she snickered, leaning forward to rest an arm on her knee

“Hah..getting lectured by a hero” she brought the cigarette to her lips, taking her time to inhale, her body relaxed as she blew out another slow cloud of smoke “Yeah, I know..” she admitted “..We all know” she added as an afterthought

We??

“I didn’t know Higari smoked”

The women let out another snicker, louder this time “Higari?” She repeated, shaking her head “Nah, I mean, not since his third year apparently. He’s not touched one since”

Oh, well this was new information he was hearing

“Then, do your other siblings smoke?” Cementoss wasn’t sure what can of worms he was cracking open, or if he should tell Higari any of this, if he knew at all that his siblings smoked. However the women occupying the steps looked like she was already thinking of her answer, fingers tapping on the step. She was quite, eyes on the floor, debating “...Sometimes” she finally answered

Cementoss tilted his head with an obvious question in his eyes

Her half lidded eyes were trained on the cigarette as though she was in a trance, or maybe it was easier to look at that then make eye contact with her company. But she’d go with the trance bit.

“Sometimes we need to take the edge off, let’s go with that”

Cementoss was no expert, he certainly had no personal experience with cigarettes. But he’d been a hero for a while, and had been in a handful of cases back in his early years concerning addiction. And the reason ‘to take the edge off’ didn’t spawn a sense a ease.

Cementoss’s brows narrowed by an inch

“There are other things you can do to help with that” he said gently, not wanting to fan a flame, or start one “..More healthier ways” he added while eyeing the thin tower of smoke rising from the cigarette.

She rolled the cigarette between her teeth and leaned back, eyes skyward - then, smoke poured from a parting between her lips. She pulled the cigarette away, tapped the ash off the glowing end, then continued to hold it “Yeah, I know” she said, almost robotically, as though reading off a script

“I hear it all the time from Ma”

“I assume she’s against it then?”

“Very” Her eyes widened as she emphasised the word. She could remember the first time her mother caught her smoking, vividly:

It’d been around three months since she took over the car workshop and business had been falling behind, they where scrapping by bills and shopping by the skin of their teeth, but just barely. She’d stolen one of Hono’s packets - he kept a secret box of em under the floorboards in his room, but they all knew about it - she remembered she struggled to light the stupid thing, Hono only had one lighter which he always kept on his person so she had to use matches.

When she finally lit the thing she’d made the mistake of smoking too close to the house, which had been her undoing when her mother rounded the back of the house to call her in for dinner

“I was on house arrest for three days and had to do the dishes for the rest of the week” The punishment hadn’t been the issue, it was the way her mother had snapped at her that had stuck, and that awkward, tense silence that followed between them days later.

Stubbornness ran in their blood, as did a furious temper, Chikara was no saint and had her fair share of grown up tantrums so to speak. Her mother, though possessing as much bark, always had this steady, calm, authoritative presence along with her anger. The type of anger that could be conveyed with a single, sharp glare and shut down an argument at dinner before it even started.

Her mother had yelled at her plenty of times sure, her and her siblings drove her up the walls plenty as kids (sometimes as adults too): Like that time she’d forgotten about the running bath upstairs when she was 10 while her mother was outside gardening and the bathroom flooded the hallway and stairwell. Her mother had a very passionate reaction to that mess.

Or that time as a teenager when she had taken her mother’s credit card to buy herself some sweets - in her defence her mother said she was gonna buy em anyway, so she figured it technically didn’t count as stealing - her mother had not been happy.

And that time she’d crashed her first ever car into a ditch at 18 while taking a short cut, even after her mother warned her about that particular road. She’d nearly broken an arm, her mother didn’t let her touch a steering wheel until the car she crashed had been repaired.

And yet all those scolding's where nothing, compared to how angry her mother had been when she caught her smoking.

“And your other siblings?” Cementoss asked, remembering how she had said we earlier “Does your mother know that they smoke too?”

Thinking a moment she leaned her head back with a hum “Knowing her, probably”

“And Higari?”

Chikara looked as if she’d seen a ghost “No! God no” she rolled her eyes with a groan, clearly Cementoss had unintentionally stepped on a sour spot - if the evident annoyance in her tone and expression meant anything that is. “Higari did mention he disapproved of smoking one time, I didn’t know the dislike was a family thing”

“It’s not--“ She started, then stopped. It looked like she was going to say something, but dropped it and changed her mind at the last minute. “If he knew, I’d never hear the end of it.” She frowned “EVER” Another pause, then her eyes widened, and she snapped her gaze towards Cementoss, so quickly it almost made him jump

“You’re not gonna tell him right?”

There was clear suspicion in her tone as her eyes narrowed at him, from her position up on the steps she was only just able to look down at him, if Cementoss had been standing she would have had to crane her neck just to make eye contact. Cementoss quickly held up his hands to appear and shook his head “It wouldn’t be my place to say”

She scowled at him for three more seconds, before looking away, her scowl - though not focused on him and not as extreme as a few seconds ago - now looked down at her feet as if they where more interesting then the point she had left off on

“Higari can just be a little..” she did a motion with her hand as if struggling to find the words

Cementoss titled his head “Protective?..”

A smile passed over her face “I was gonna go with something like smothering, over bearing, a worry wort..maybe I’ll call him mothering if I’m feeling generous” she had begun to count on the fingers of her spare hand, before she lowered it to rest back down on the step “But, yeah, over protective. That sums it up”

Cementoss could understand that, from a hero’s perspective. Higari was more on the side lines then the lime light when it came to the line of work, but being protective of your family when your work had you face so many threats to your well being came with the territory. The same with being an older brother, though he couldn’t speak from experience with that one

“I’m sure he doesn’t mean to be a bother, Higari is just a very straight forward person.” He knew Hatsume was one person who would confirm that for him “I’m sure his over-protectiveness comes from a place of love and care for you and the rest of his siblings”

She gave him a sideways glance, her scowl lifting ever so slightly. She looked back towards the cigarette and it’s dying trail of smoke, her fingers gripped it a little tighter.

She sighed “Yeah, I know..” she said dejectedly “It’s just..I dunno” she looked lost, her gaze distant, like she was in a different place “Ever since he came to UA things at home just got so...different?” She sounded as sure as she looked, but Cementoss said nothing, sensing she had more to say

“After the whole drama with dad and his passing, when Higari came here it...I dunno it was like, Mum felt like she was loosing someone else?” She had began to gesture with her hands, at first only slightly, now they where becoming more obvious as the emotional gates opened more and more “And then Hono fell off the tracks, Ma barely had it together, and no one knew what the hell to do with the family business!”

“Car repairs isn’t it?” Cementoss remembered Higari mentioned it in passing conversation on a separate occasion

She nodded “Those first few months getting the business sorted, putting dads stuff away in storage or chucking it to the dump, taking care of Suru it was all so...much!” She almost dropped her cigarette with how aggressively she had thrown her arms out “And Ma wasn’t in any state to be our therapist, she barely had herself together trying to adjust to everything! And our Uncle he-...He just didn’t-“ she had that face again, a face that suggested she was struggling to find the right words, Cementoss noticed how her nose scrunched up

“Well, he wasn’t as good at being an Uncle back then, he had his hands full with Hono and..well—” Chikara trailed off, breathing laboured through her nose...then she realised how much she had said, how many wounds she had just exposed to this guy.

To her brothers work colleague who she barely knew

The embarrassment exploded in her chest just as much as it did her face, wishing for the universe to have mercy upon her and have a stray meteor enter the atmosphere and obliterate her on the spot. A quick and painless death.

“God I-“ she rubbed a hand over her face, hanging her head to avoiding looking at the hero across from her. She couldn’t believe she said all that! “Sorry, that got deep for no reason..”

Cementoss had the same expression as before: calm, unbothered and - to Chikara’s despair - unreadable. “It’s no bother” She groaned, god just kill her now. Let the ground swallow her. Higari spoke very little of his parents, mostly his siblings when he was asked about his family. Higari had mentioned his mother a few times, but Cementoss had always guessed the father had never been in the picture as Higari never brought him up, and Cementoss didn’t want to be rude by asking when, really, it wasn’t his business to begin with.

Seemed as though there was more history to Higari’s family then Cementoss had originally thought

“It seems like you and your family have all gone through some hard times, finding ways to cope with that emotional and mental turmoil is human nature. I didn’t mean to make you feel ashamed by it”

Shyly, which was an emotion that looked odd on the person who presented herself as nothing but laid back and casual, his company looked up from their hand and towards him

“..You didnt..” she mumbled into her palm, just loud enough for him to hear “Honestly, I don’t even like smoking that much. I know what it does to you and I try not to do it often. There’s just..well, ain’t as much help available in the country then there is here” The end of her cigarette had gone out, but she wasn’t paying attention to it “When you live in a small town with little villain attacks you don’t get all the fancy shmancy help stuff you get in the city, best we got down there is a basic doc and vet”

A pause

“Guess that comes with being a hero, preaching about the goodness of ones health and all..”

She let out a weak laugh to try and brighten her mood, it worked as well as she hoped “...Hah, wow, this is awkward” she said, mostly to herself, before looking to Cementoss “Your school faculty members sister venting to a hero who she doesn’t even know the name of.”

Another weak laugh and a failed attempt to ease her discomfort “Least I can say my introduction is gonna make an impression”

Here did Cementoss let out a small huff of humour “You could say that, but not the worst impression..and it’s Cementoss by the way”

“Hm?” She cocked a brow

“My name is Cementoss” he repeated “If you want to get technical: Cementoss is my hero name, most of the others here refer to me by that”

She smiled - Cementoss decided he liked the look on her - “Pleasure to have you in my presence” she extended a hand towards him “Not every day someone lets you talk about your messy family problems on the first introduction”

Cementoss smiled, his hand gently clasping around hers, his giant hands practically engulfed her tiny ones. “I’m gonna go on a bet and say your quirk has something to do with cement?” Cementoss hummed, mocking thought, before he nodded “You’d be correct” Her smile widened, happy to find out she had indeed been correct “So what’s my prize?”

Cementoss blinked, letting go of her hand “Prize?”

She pointed to him “You’re a teacher right? Ain’t teachers supposed to give rewards for correct answers?” She pressed a hand to her chest, one leg resting over the other “I’d be partial to a gold star sticker if you have any”

Cementoss lifted a finger “Technically this isn’t a class and you’re not a pupil Chi”

She stuck her tongue out at him “Poo, you’re no fun—..” she blinked “What did you call me?” Her expression was a mix between confusion and surprise, maybe she hadn’t heard him correctly? Cementoss lowered his hand “I thought I heard Higari refer to you as Chi when you where talking earlier”

The women was quite, then, let out a laugh

Cementoss looked off to the side, unsure of what to do or if she was laughing at him, or more likely if she was laughing at something he had said. Had he assumed incorrectly?

“Sorry!” She waved her hand at him when she noticed how muddled he looked “I didn’t mean to laugh, it’s just that Chi is my nickname” she smiled down at him again “My actual name is Chikara”

“..Oh..” Cementoss felt his cheeks grow hot, and Chikara, smirked. He stiffened, eyes widening as she resisted the urge to giggle as she covered her mouth with the back of her hand “I-..Sorry” Cementoss mumbled “I didn’t realise..”

“Hey, no sweat” Chikara brushed him off combined with a bat of her hand, but even she couldn’t deny that a flustered Cementoss was a very entertaining thing “Out of the nicknames you coulda called me, Chi is certainly one of the ones I like the most. Like-“ she sat up on the step, moving a bit closer to him “-Higari and the rest sometimes call me stuff like snot face”

Cementoss was going to say he didn’t think the usually mind-his-own-business Higari was capable of giving someone an insulting nickname, then he remembered that one time the teachers had started a swear jar and Higari had it full by the end of the second week.

So, yeah, that did sound like something he would do

“I call him short stack”

Curse him: he let out a snicker. Higari was rather small

“Appropriate” he replied “...You know, the first time I met Higari I accidentally mistook him for a student”

“What!” Chikara’s grin grew impossibly wider “Haha! No way! God-“ she shook her head, the very image of that scenario pure gold! “-I wish I coulda been there to see that!” She whirled her head back to him, curiosity lacing every word “What did he do?”

“Not much” Cementoss replied honestly “He told me it was fine after I apologised-“ profusely apologised “-and we both went on with our day”

Chikara’s smile fell into a pout “Boring” she crossed her arms over her chest “You could have exaggerated the story a lil’ bit greenie”

“...Greenie?” Cementoss echoed back quietly

As if it was obvious, Chikara pointed down to the small patch of the flower bed Cementoss had previously been tending to before she had appeared. Cementoss followed her pointed finger “You’re a gardener, gardeners have green thumbs: Greenie” she explained, one side of her lip curled up in a half smile

The last time someone gave Cementoss a nickname must have been in his second year during school.

“You could always call me by my actual name” he suggested, not apposed to the nickname, it just wasn’t something he was used too.

“Your hero name? Or your real name?”

“Cementoss. Or Ken - my real name”  

“Ken..” Chikara repeated, testing how the name sounded. She hummed, looking skyward. She repeated his name again and her eyes squinted in thought “...Nah” she shrugged “My nicknames better Greenie” Cementoss rolled his eyes, guess Greenie was something he was going to have to get used too. Though it wasn’t the worst thing he had been called since high school - he’d been given plenty of names then, names which he preferred to not think back on

“You plant a lot?” Chikara asked, looking down to the freshly tended piece of flower bed Cementoss was sitting besides

Cementoss looked to the sapling he had just planted, then to the other three he had done earlier that day “Sometimes, when I have time between classes” truly work at UA and hero work didn’t leave him a great deal of free time for himself, but he managed with what little he had. “UA doesn’t have a proper garden, so I tend to the plants in and around the teachers dorms. It gives me something to do”

“You know, Higari used to be a bit of a plant nutt before he came to UA. According to Tai, he used to name them”

“Tai is one of your other brothers?” Cementoss asked

“My twin” Chikara answered

“Naming plants sounds like Higari” Cementoss finished patting down the soil around the freshly planted saplings, then stood. Brushing the dirt off from his knees he turned towards the steps of the teachers dorms, Chikara was now having to crane her neck slightly to make eye contact with him “...I believe Ectoplasm mentioned he caught Higari talking to their houseplants one time”

Cementoss couldn’t help but peak an eye open at her to catch her reaction: which was her leaping to her feet faster then a jack rabbit with her eyes as wide as plates “Seriously!” She cheered, barely containing her laughter, before bolting back into the dorms. Cementoss went to follow, before Chikara’s head suddenly stuck back out “You comin’ with?”

Cementoss blinked “Do you want me to?”

“Sure” Chikara said “...I also want to ensure I have the protection of a hero incase Higari tries to kill me, which he probably will” Chikara stuffed the now dead cigarette bud into her pocket, she’d find a bin for a later, before practically skipping back into the building

“Keep up Greenie!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chikara stared down at the quaint little flower pot and the teenie little sprout poking up from the soil. It looked relatively new, probably just planted a few days ago - maybe even today

She titled her head “A..plant?” She asked

Cementoss nodded “Yes”

“...Why?” Chikara asked, looking up to him - literally - she underestimated how tall he would be standing. It’s not like she was ungrateful for any gifts, but she hadn’t been expecting a plant when she and the rest of her siblings where about to leave. Her or the rest of her siblings had brought any gifts when they came down - none that she knew of anyway - so this was certainly a surprise 

“Is this to do with the nickname I gave you? You tryna get back at me somehow?”

“It’s nothing to do with that” Cementoss shook his head as he cleared her suspicions on that note “I remember yesterday how..” Cementoss looked around, checking no one else was around, before continuing “You said you didn’t like smoking, I thought perhaps a plant might help”

Chikara blinked, looked at the plant, then Cementoss, then back again “You..want me to try gardening instead of smoking?”

Cementoss nodded

Chikara blinked, then, looked back down to the plant: just a plain old plant pot. The tiny green stalk just barely breaching the top of the soil, which was still damp from its morning watering. Chikara realised that Cementoss was probably waiting for her to take it, so she slowly raised her hands till they came to grasp the plant pot.

“What kind of plant is it?” She asked while turning the pot carefully in her hands as if searching for some kind of label. Cementoss shrugged and - though Chikara could only guess with that oddly shaped mouth of his - smiled “I can’t quite recall” Chikara rose a brow up at him “Must have slipped my mind - you’ll have to tell me when it grows”

Chikara blinked again and was quite for a few seconds, before rolling her eyes and huffing “Oh, I see” she moved the pot to her side, holding it in her right hand as she pointed to him with her left “You’re not gonna tell me so that I’ll have to take care of it to find out” sneaky, she thought in the back of her head, and pretty clever - respect

“Perhaps” Cementoss said with an innocent shrug “It would be nice to know what it grows into, as a fan of gardening myself of course”

“Hm” Chikara’s lip quirked into a smile, one brow cocked “Right” she said with a slow nod

“...Wait-“ Chikiara’s smile fell, so suddenly that Cementoss grew worried for a second, before she asked “How am I supposed to tell you what it grows into if I don’t have any way to contact you?”

Ah..he hadn’t thought of that

The UA dorms had a phone on the ground floor that was mostly used to talk with parents or other staff in the building, incase of emergencies, thankfully they hadn’t yet used it for the latter reason - in any case giving her the number for that phone probably wasn’t allowed, since it was meant to be a phone strictly for the staff and used only for work related purposes. Cementoss did have a phone, but with his fat fingers typing a number was beyond the realm of possibility - his phone often had to be opened and used with voice recognition - but that aside he gave out his number so rarely he honestly couldn’t remember it off the top of his head.

He hummed

“Well, you could give me your number” He said without really thinking. Then his brain kicked in and he realised what he asked  

Chikara blinked wide eyes up at him as Cementoss’s cheeks got hot

“I-“ he waved a hand apologetically “Of course you don’t have to if you’re uncomfortable! I’d understand. I can always ask Higari to keep me updated-“

Chikara dug around in her pocket and produced a marker “You got some paper?” She asked

Cementoss blinked at her...then quickly reached into his pocket and pulled out a small notebook. With Chikara holding the plant in one hand he offered to hold the notebook for her as Chikara scrawled her number down onto the page “Ya know, it’s often traditional for a gentleman to wine and dine a lady before askin’ for her number” Chikara teased, offering him a smirk and a honest to god wink as she pulled the marker away “But, just this once, I’ll let it slide~”

Cementoss’s face felt hotter, and he prayed it wasn’t obvious. Chikara’s smirk got wider, oh, it was obvious wasn’t it?

“I-“ Cementoss cleared his throat, pulling the notebook shyly to his chest “Thank you..”

“No problem” Chikara turned to walk towards the doors of UA teachers dorms where the rest of her siblings where waiting - looked like Taiho was trying to split up a quarrel between Higari and Hono, shocker. “See ya round!” She said over her shoulder, waving a little before trotting to catch up with her family outside

Cementoss watched from the hallway as Chikara approached Higari from behind and smacked his hair into his face, prompting Higari to say something at her that made her chuckle.

Looking down at his notebook, Cementoss stared down at the line of digits written in marker. When was the last time he’d asked for a women’s number? Anyone’s number period! After reading the line of numbers over three times, his eyes where suddenly drawn to a small note scribbled in the bottom right hand corner of the page. The writing was a bit messy, obviously written quickly, so he had to bring it closer to his face to read it clearly

‘How bold of you Greenie, Chikara xxx’

His face got hotter again

[sheepwithspecs]

i'm really in a slump and having a hard time writing right now because i've sort of lost passion for it but i did want to share something i had written for the CarvRhos arranged marriage au bc i still think it's a cute scene of Rhoswen reading to the Sirens' children... idk when the fic will be released now but i don't want it to go to waste so enjoy

__

Fun fact Aubrix and Zori were two OCs that were going to be in a oneshot but it was never made so they just exist in the nebulous concept of "i know who they are but my readers won't" unfortunately

-Aubrix is a 10 yo half-Hyur, half-Elezen whose goal is to honor his auntie captain by killing Carvallain one day

-Zori is a 6 yo Miqote that uses her cute baby fangs to draw blood (bad habit of biting first and asking questions later)

“N’ as they rode up the mountain path, one o’ them—erm—” Rhoswen scowled down at the tome on her lap, lips pursed in annoyance as she tried to puzzle out the word. The page swam before her weary eyes, elegant letters dissolving into meaningless squiggles on the faded parchment. “M… Majestic beasts came swoopin’ down from the ‘eavens. The boy’s chocobo reared up in fright, sending the boy tumblin’ down the mountainside to his n… his ni….”

“Nigh-certain demise,” whispered Aubrix sleepily, his small head pillowed against her shoulder.

“To his nigh-certain demise,” she repeated firmly, turning the page with a barely suppressed huff. The Boy and the Dragon Gay had become a recent favorite amongst the many younglings who called the Missing Member home. For days on end they’d been begging her to read it aloud, never once minding the fact that even the youngest of the brood could read circles around their “Aunt Rhoswen”. Now, having finally surrendered to their incessant cries, she was left picking her way through the Coerthan tale word by godsforsaken word.

As a general rule, most of the Sirens did not waste idle time worrying about where their children were at any given moment. Most of the younglings lived in the tavern, the bastard children of Sirnes who had no clue—nor care—who the father might be. Others, like Aubrix, were born of Sirens who had chosen to wed for one reason or another, and lived in the city proper. It was assumed that if they weren’t at someone’s home, they were in the tavern; if they weren’t there, they were wading in the shallows, or wandering the marketplace, or pestering the Skylift workers for a free ride up the Descent.

Together they made up a large group of unruly ragamuffins that, for the most part, could look after themselves. The rest of the crew worked as collective eyes and ears, with everyone from the lowest deckhand to the Rhoswen herself keeping watch over the little brats as though they were her own flesh and blood. A force to be reckoned with, they had a keen understanding of how to wheedle anything they wanted out of an unsuspecting victim… including their own captain.

In truth, Rhoswen did not mind reading the occasional fairie story, even if it took valuable time out of her busy schedule. Though she constantly cursed her own softheartedness wherever the scheming little bastards were concerned, she could not bear to see their hopes dashed by her own misgivings. The majority of her life had been spent in illiteracy, only able to recognize those seven distinct letters that made up her given name. She had taught herself to read as a deckhand, collecting scraps of parchment from every plundered ship and painstakingly tracing them by lamplight long after the others had retired to their bunks. Despite her best efforts, she was still forced to sound out all but the simplest of words, her clumsy tongue tripping over the syllables.

It was for this every reason that she had insisted all children born to Siren mothers would learn to read and write. The mismatched bunch huddled around her on the threadbare coverlets were much better equipped to handle the world than their own mothers would ever be, safe from corrupt guards bearing false warrants or conniving merchants with dubiously worded contracts. Though they might hem and haw over their slates, she could rest easy in the fact that they would thank her one day for the efforts she took to secure their education.  

“N’ the gods saw fit to spare his life, if only m… meagerly so. As he lay there, battered n’ broken, all manner o’ foul beasts drew near—” The heavy ocean winds rattled the shutters, moaning eerily in as it swept through the Aftcastle and whistled in the eaves. The children nestled around her like so many chicks in a nest, the eldest reading along over her shoulders while the littlest ones dozed on her lap. They shivered with trepidation as the illustrated shadows on the accompanying page, hulking and half-hidden by the leafy undergrowth as they crept towards where the wounded boy lay in the foreground.

“He’s gonna be okay, aye?” Zori asked with a yawn that seemed to split her face in two, chubby fists rubbing at her eyes. Her feline ears, overlarge for her small stature, flattened as she studied the illustration with clear concern in her bright gaze. This was hardly the first time that any of the children had heard the tale, but they seemed to enjoy the pretense of asking questions as though it were brand new.

“Turn the page, n’ we’ll see what happens.” Had it been left up to her, the boy would have broken his neck at the bottom of the mountain and saved her the trouble of reading the rest. But of course a child’s fairie story would never end on such a sour note.

There was a collective sigh of admiration as they caught sight of the dragon illustration on the next page. The sinuous creature was painted so that its scales seemed to shimmer in the lamplight. Iridescent flames erupted from its gaping maw to frame the border of the text. Rhoswen had never seen a dragon before in her life, and certainly had no plans to go searching for one. Still, even she had to admit that the creature did seem rather formidable, if not majestic.

“Just as the boy was makin’ his peace with the Twelve, another dragon—”

“Cap’n?”

[fan-burns]

Robots 2

Chapter 2: Ratchet’s POV 

“Oh my Cog, I can’t believe it worked!”

In my hands was a copy of the Robot Times from yesterday. It was a pain in the aft to get, but I’m glad that I did. The headline read:

“Revolutionary Ratchet?

Two years ago, the murderous Ratchet disappeared from public eye, but was he really all that bad? 

Turn to page 12 to find out!”

I don’t believe it, the old coot actually did it. He mind controlled everyone that works for the paper!

As I stood there stunned, a distorted voice sounded from behind me. “And you said it vas just a myth!”

I turned to face the rust bucket responsible for this. Doctor Veyizmir. Anyone who knew him would sprint at the mere sound of his grisly voice. Like the rest of his body, his voice had deteriorated over the years. It has a nasty habit of switching from American to German as he spoke, making him all the more unnerving and unhinged. He’s been trying to fix it for as long as I remember, but to no avail.

I’m still amazed that he’s even alive, considering how old he is. He was an outmode long before they were officially a thing, and he was well past his warranty. Yet somehow, by some demonic intervention on his part, he still lives. 

He looked like he came straight out of a Hollywood horror movie, he was crippled, old, and fat. He even had the glasses and thick gray eyebrows to boot. His body was stained brown with rust and Cog knows whatever chemicals he’s been playing with. Whatever paint job he had on completely vanished, and was replaced with a thin coat of dust. His face wasn’t any better, as his mouth had been so corroded that it began to form a sort of “beak” shape. His teeth had long since rotted away, making him all the more unpleasant to look at. 

Despite his round body, he was only being held up by his thin, frail limbs, and has to carry a cane with him less he risk falling over. The cane in question was held by a set of thin hands, which were easily mistaken for spiders when they moved around. His pointer fingers were, well, they were needles. Most likely filled with some metal corroding acid that he created, or some liquid that could turn you into a rusted statue in a matter of seconds.

He was…creative like that. To highlight this fact, there was a lightbulb sat upon his head that lit up whenever he had one of these creative ideas. Over the years, some of the wires connected to it began to sprout from his forehead, causing a slight electric shock every now and again whenever it tried to light up. 

I feel like I can’t go a single day without seeing it try to light up at least once, and everytime it does, I can’t help but feel sorry for his next “Pet Project”. 

As he stepped out of the shadows, I could hear his joints creak and groan under his own weight. As he opened his beak, small streams of smoke had escaped from him as he struggled to speak in his jumbled accents.

“As I’ve said before, zis is zee future of us all…Under normal conditions, zis Electromagnetic pulse can only briefly inconfenience us vith zee occasional blackout or, at zee worst, damaged equipment. Howefer, vith my expertise, ve are capable of many, many things. Of course, such technologies have never existed up until zis point, and have only served as a tale to tell to children at night…until I had a go at it!”

I didn’t want to know how he was able to bring fiction into reality, but at the same time I was morbidly interested.

“Soooooooo…what did you do? How did you do it?”

His beak turned into that signature evil grin of his, the last sight of many of his little experiments. 

“Oh, you give me hope for zee youth!” Spoke the twisted figure. “At least someone is interested in vat I do! It vas quite easy, actually, much easier zan I expected! Back in zee old days, I used to make smaller signals using metal rods and lightning from ze sky! zey could only cause a simple power outage, but it was quite ze feat! Course...zat led to a fire in the town I was residing in, and I had to flee.”

“I thought you had to flee town because you killed a bunch of bots?”

“Well…that too. But zat’s beside zee point…What I’m trying to say is zat I can go bigger. I can weaponize an EMP signal, the nightmare of all robots! Think of it, sonny. zee whole world looking to you for advice, for your orders, for your command!”

There’s the other thing about Doctor V. His theatrics and comparisons with wild, starving animals and bots.

“It’s tantalizing, isn’t it?” He went on, “All zat power in one place, it makes you want to crawl out of zis cage and into ze palace banquet!”

As he went on, he stepped closer to me, tapping his cane on the ground to emphasize the point. 

“You’d be unstoppable…and anyone vho gets in your vay vill only find themselves devoured by your pover and zeir ovn lust for you! A lust of vhich, you vill inflict upon zem vith your voice and authority alone…You’ll be irresistible to many, loved by ze majority, and obeyed by all! How could you possibly not vant something like zat?!”

The Doctor was a master at tempting you, too. He’ll promise you something you can’t resist, and he’ll damage you beyond repair intentionally or unintentionally. Then he’ll drag whatever’s left of you to his workshop and claim you as his next “Pet Project”. He’s like a wicked genie in a bottle cranked to eleven. It’s the one reason why I’ve been avoiding him everytime I come down here to see my mother. But now that she’s gone, and I’m basically living here now, I’m forced to talk to him. 

But the more I listened to him, the more I found myself agreeing with him. I have wanted to get back at that little blue brat and his coffee pot pet for a while…and this could be my ticket back to the top. But if I’m going to go along with Dr. V’s plan, I have to play it safe, I can’t get too greedy. For all I know, this could be some conspiracy against me.

“You have a point, but how are we-”

“Simple…ve’ll keep altering the cell tovers in zee city as ve’ve been doing. Vhile ve’re doing that, I’ll create a generator inside ze Shop. Once zat’s finished, I’ll forge vhat I call a “Conduit”, zat vill use that generator’s power to control ze masses.”

“Wait, why can’t you just skip the generator and just make the Conduit the generator? Wouldn’t that be easier?”

Doctor V. gave me one of his infamous side glares, “Because, boy, zis main generator contains ze real pover. A generator squeezed in one place can only cover so much ground, and von’t be able to reach zee entire city. Zee Conduit vill be able to spread zee signals to areas vhere zee EMP cannot fully reach. Vith a smaller, more portable signal on zee side vill ensure zat no one can resist! Ve can’t have a rebellion in our empire, now do vee?”

What he was suggesting ws horrifying, but brilliant…I’m slowly starting to see why mom kept him around. To an extent at least.

“But how are you going to build this thing?! Where are you going to-”

He interrupted again by waving his needle finger at me and made a “Tsk Tsk Tsk” with his beak. “You just focus on zat little boyfriend of yours and let me handle ze rest…How is he, by the vay? I haven't seen him in a vhile.”

“He’s not my-”

He shrugged his eyebrow at me.

“I mean…he’s fine. Last I heard he’s scored a job at Bigweld’s. We’re keeping communication low just in case. If he’s really in a position of power, we can’t afford to have him lose it!”

“I see…Vell zen, I best get started.”

Before he could disappear back to the shadows, I placed a hand on his shoulder.

“How long do you think it’ll take?”

He looked surprised that I asked, as if he was genuinely taken aback that I was interested in this plan of his. Delighted, He turned to me and gave me an answer. 

“Vell, based on how well zee tests have gone so far, I’ll give it…four years, at least.”

“FOUR YEARS?!”

“You can’t rush art!” His voice croaked. “At least it isn’t a decade! It’ll go by in a flash, you’ll see.”

And just like that, he vanished into the shadows. Down into the abyss of the shop, far from the heat of the smelters and embracing the cold. 

“This better work, doctor.”

This had better work.

[parvulous-writings]

Karl Heisenberg // SFW alphabet

Request: So there was no actual request, I just knew this would cheer up my closest friend. 

Dedicated to: @rey-is-not-a-skywalker

Summary: A sfw A-Z for Karl Heisenberg, from Resident Evil Village!

Warnings: Explicit language

Notes: Please, have some Soft!Heisenberg, bor. It’s one of the many, many things you deserve.  To those who have requested oneshots- I am working on them, please be patient! My requests are currently open! My pinned post (found here) contains both a list of characters I write for, and a masterlist!

Not my gif

A - Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?) 

He’s never affectionate publicly. Behind closed doors, though- well maybe he’s not your stereotypical lovey-dovey type, but hey-ho, he shows it in his own little way. A few hugs, but mostly through making you things. Music boxes, little figures and robots that wind up, you name it, he’ll try and make it. 

B - Best Friend (What would they be like as a best friend? Where does the friendship start?)

He’s not a friendly man, typically. He’s cold, and driven only by his motives. It takes a long time for him to warm up to you, but when he eventually does he is always by your side, whenever you should need him. Be it for violence, or for an ear to pour your thoughts into- even though half the time you swear he’s not listening completely. 

C - Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

Heisenberg likes warm cuddles above all others. The kind where he can pull you close and hold you there for a while- he likes feeling you against his chest. It’s comforting to him, after years of no affection and a torturous living experience. 

D - Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking, cleaning, ect?)

Karl is not particularly skilled in any domestic skill. He’s very mediocre at cooking, and he can’t clean to save his life- his factory is littered with dust and other probably very harmful particles. He isn’t very good in a domestic environment at all, really. 

E - Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Blunter than a broken pencil I’m afraid. He’s never had to hide something from you in the past, so why should this be any different? He would not want to beat around the bush here, he’d annoy himself with pleasantries and euphemisms. 

F - Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? Do they wanna get married?)

He’s perfectly fine staying as partners, without marriage looming over the pair of you. Quite frankly, he doesn’t think it’s worth it.  “A piece of damn paper to show someone your fucking devotion? Bullshit.” 

G - Gentle (How gentle are they both physically and emotionally?)

Unless you’re shaking like a leaf or have specifically asked him to be gentle with or around you, he’s not going to be. He’ll treat you much how he treats most others- with a little bit of affection for zest and flavour every now and then. 

H - Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it, and what are they like?)

While he likes cuddles, he isn’t a huge fan of hugs. He thinks they’re too short to show any real affection, and often get in the way of whatever task the recipient is trying to perform.  

I - I Love You (How fast do they say the “love” word?)

S l o w l y. This man has gone through some stuff, and doesn’t want to get attached to people despite falling for you. Give him a chance. 

J - Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What are they like when jealous?)

Okay so he may be “non-committal” in a loose sense of the term, but this man is one jealous motherfucker. And he gets angry. I’m talking  punching the wall, lashing out and breaking shit kind of angry. It’s mostly because of a nagging fear that not only will he lose you to someone you think is better or less monstrous than he is, but also in part due to a feeling that because of what he was forced to become, he isn’t good enough to keep you for himself. 

K - Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

He kisses you on your hands or neck mostly. Those are his favourite places to kiss you. He occasionally kisses you on the inside of your wrist. If you have any scars as well, he’ll kiss them. 

L - Little Ones (How are they around kids?)

It depends. Sometimes he’s the perfect uncle figure, others he’s a whirlwind of rage. If you’re taking him to see some children for a prolonged amount of time, please check how he’s acting and feeling on the day so there isn’t some sort of horrific accident. 

M - Morning (What are mornings like with them?)

There’s nothing special about them, he’s usually up long before you are. He doesn’t leave anything like a hot beverage behind, unless it’s a special occasion that he’s remembered- like a birthday or anniversary. 

N - Nights (How are nights spent with them?)

He often tells you to go to bed before him, as he’s usually working on something, and would rather not have to worry about you being down in his factory and workshop. 

O - Open (When do they open up about themselves?)

When he’s extremely angry. He gets riled up, then will start to spill facts and secrets while hardly even realising it. 

P - Patience (How easily angered are they?)

He has a very short fuse and a violent temper, to say the least. There’s a reason the man swears so much. Though he will often apologise if he’s scared you after an outburst. 

Q - Quizzes (How much do they remember about you?)

He remembers the basic things at the very least- Your name, your habits on eating and drinking, what you do to amuse yourself. He’s quite observant, actually. 

R - Remember (Favorite memory with you?)

He made you a small music box once. The past part of his day, or his entire week, was seeing your smile as you opened it and listened to it for the first time. It was the widest he’d ever seen you smile, and he loved the feeling it gave him. 

S - Security (How protective are they?)

Very. One particular other Lord- “Lady Super-Sized Bitch,” as Heisenberg has dubbed her- is very interested in your presence, and Heisenberg has made it very much his business to keep you practically under lock and key to keep you safe. And when Ethan Winters comes around? Ooh, boy. You ain’t leaving his sight. 

T - Try (How much effort do they put in?)

He does try- through making trinkets and gadgets to both help you and show his affection. Sometimes it may not always seem that way though, with his outbursts and his tantrums. 

U - Ugly (What are their bad habits?)

He smokes. You tried to get him to quit once, then stopped when you realised it made him more irritable. 

V - Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

He’s not that concerned. If he’s still kicking... Well that’s all that matters to him. 

W - Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

He’d feel that something’s wrong, something’s not right- a cog missing from a machine, in a sense. And he hates that feeling. 

X - Xtra (Random HC)

This man would die for some ice-cream. You bring him a tub of the stuff- BAM, instant good mood for the next like two days. 

Y - Yuck (Things they don’t like either in general or a partner?)

This man is not fussy, in the slightest. 

Z - Zzz (Sleep habits)

He basically doesn’t, he gets so little it’s a wonder he can actually function normally. 

[hisredhysteria]

Headcanons for Cutthroat as a Child

Note: I am alive..! I've been editing more so than writing, but I did promise I'd post these even if it was just Cutthroat's..! I always assume my followers have already seen Cutthroat's past panels, but if not, they're here just in case...! Although you can probably read these without it, since they're just for fun on my end.

TW: blood mention, killing bugs, and some of this may be disturbing in some way.

Summary: I suppose the title works wonders for me here-

Don't let yourself be fooled by his innocent demeanor~

He WOULD peek through the cracks of a bathroom stall, see the person wearing red, and shout, "look..!! look, mama they're wearing red..!" 

In all seriousness though, the relationship between Cutthroat and his mother was likely to be heavily admired. Every other mom would seemingly be jealous that she had managed to obtain such a close knit bond with her son.

From an outside perspective, they're the perfect mother and son duo...! Little do they know why it's such a close knit bond..

His mom was often stopped by other adults, who admired Cutthroat for being such an adorable child. Ironic, to say the least.

Strangers compared him to that of an angel, pure and white.

He was somewhat popular amongst adults who only took him at face value, and he was the talk of the neighborhood as well.

Because Cutthroat was quite different looking, it was easy to throw your eyes his way when out for a stroll, even as a child.

However, being well mannered to match the innocent look was a little bit of a skewed story. People forgive a lot of bad manners when you're a kid though, right?

At least, Cutthroat's mother did.

Other children could sense a strange feeling from being too close to someone like Cutthroat, so most kids refused to approach him.

He didn't seem like someone that even wanted to be included in their activities for the most part though. He was happy to do his own little thing.

Sure, he may have gotten a few shy approaches from other kids offering to play with him…but he was much too busy daydreaming.

About his mom's halo, of course.

Occasionally he'd happily accept other children's invitations to play on days he was feeling antsy..! The playdate would become more and more ...odd, the longer Cutthroat spent time with them though. Leaving the other kid disturbed when they went home...

Because of this, rumours were eventually spread about Cutthroat being a dangerous child. However, they were small and not well received nor believed.

If Cutthroat saw his mom in view while playing with another child, the playdate would end right then and there so he could run off to her. Not so much as a goodbye to his playmate. His mother is the ultimate playmate in his eyes.

Cutthroat had no interest in progressing academically either….not unless his mom was there to teach him something. Even then, he was too busy staring at her red halo..

Daycare attendants had found Cutthroat to be a child like any other, maybe even a little more special because of how sweet he looked.

He did get very excited at certain things, especially when they were red…but it wasn't something the daycare attendants found too odd. They may have had an inkling he was different because he had some strange habits…but all kids do, it's forgivable...!

His unusual behavior started to come to the surface when he presented his mother one of his very first special drawings…

His innocent smile is the first thing she noticed in the drawing he made. Then the knife drawn in his hand. Then a body that resembled her own, encompassed by a messy red splatter of red marker….

Well, since he's her angel…of course she had to frame it...! He did mention it was special...

His favorite room in the house was always the bathroom or kitchen. He'd rarely spend time alone in his room and would generally prefer being wherever his mom is in the house.

He'd probably sneak into his mother’s bed while she was sleeping or get upset if he had to sleep in his own room.

He'd put things in his mother's shopping cart and she'd rarely tell him no…

Avid ant stomper…ah..! It's just so fun to watch them curl up into a little ball, twitch…then die.

Bigger bugs were more fun for him though…or even mosquitos. Wack a plump one and watch as a small hint of red leaks out..

Marshmallows had him easily fooled. If you wanted to bribe him with them…it wouldn't be too hard, even as an adult. 

Would probably be a menace in classrooms...pulling the fire alarms because they're red. Sneaking sharp objects because they're shiny....eating glue because it looks like the same sticky consistency of a melted marshmallow....

He's also thrown a level 9 tantrum after slipping and hurting himself in a rain puddle he purposely jumped in.

After his mom told him it was dangerous to jump in rain puddles...

[scuttle-buttle]

Chapter 11

WC: 2077

Rated: E

Chapter Tags: full on angst, discussions of emotional trauma, mild depictions of blood/gore, mentions of self h*rm & su*cide, mentions of child abuse, discussions of physical disabilities, institutionalization, some dialogue & plot canon to TV show, hurt/comfort

🧠

The rest of the conference went by much like the first day did. Both you and Laszlo bought a few books for your collections. An ease had settled over your conversations with the help of Sara and John's presence; you spoke more freely with each other. You tell yourself it is not because he's going soft on you or vice versa, but rather that you have found yourself in this imaginary bubble where you happen to get on well. It's inevitable that it will pop once you’re back at school and Laszlo will revert back to his usual callous state.

Laszlo. It still felt odd to think of him like that, rather than by his title. You couldn't lie, it gave you a sort of thrill. Even in your dreams you had only called him by his honorific. Thankfully you didn't have another dream after Friday. You couldn't escape the feeling that you'd said something incriminating in front of the man in question. So you chose to pretend it didn't happen.

Monday morning came and you headed to the train station. Once again he had secured a private cabin for the journey. This time you came prepared with a book since you had yet to replace your broken phone.

"Thank you again for inviting me to this, I really enjoyed myself. It was really nice of the department to foot my travel expenses, the hotel was really fancy. I may have helped myself to a mini-bottle or two," you joked.

"There is no need to worry about the department's finances; they were not involved."

You pause. He paid for you? Laszlo did say he would take care of the arrangements; but the four-star hotel, the private compartment train tickets, the admission to the conference, and every meal? Shit, that must have been a fortune, hundreds of dollars at least.

You don't know what to say, so you settle for an awkward "oh." A moment passes before you add "I appreciate that, um, I can pay you back. Might take some time but I can."

The professor is flippant in his reply. "There is no need, it was well spent for the research and knowledge acquired." He opens his book signaling the conversation is over.

You lick your lips. Fine then, I'll just consider it payment for emotional suffering and damages of the last eight weeks.

The first few hours of the journey were spent reading one of the new books you picked up at the convention. Occasionally you would peek over the pages at the professor. He was engrossed in his own selection; sometimes he would pause to write down a thought.

Around the seventh hour of your journey you had given up on reading anymore in favor of looking at the fields outside. The silence was comforting.

Laszlo had trouble concentrating on the book in his hand. He saw you as a conundrum. One minute you could be sociable and teasing with your comments, then next you were biting at his throat with your quick wit and fierce ideals. He decides that he wants to know what made you into who you are today. Now is as good a time as any.

His eyes on you cause a tingle up your spine but you ignore it. Laszlo breaks the silence; "may I ask a personal question?"

"You just did," you answer, still peering out of the large window. He huffed once, amused. At his following silence you face him. You raise your eyebrows to signal him to go on with his question. Curiosity grows at the thought of what he intends to ask.

"Twice now you have made implications of a traumatic past," he begins.

Bubble popped.

Interrupting, you snark "is this the part where you psychoanalyze me, doc? Because trust me, I've been through enough of that." You pick at the lint on your jeans.

Laszlo tries to choose his words more carefully the next time he speaks. "What I mean to say is, the first afternoon in the classroom where you defended that student you implied you had been witness to a trauma. You then displayed signs of anger and embarrassment before leaving prematurely. Yesterday you mentioned having entered a psychiatric facility. As an alienist I can't help but find myself curious about your experiences."

You slide your eyes to meet his from across the cabin. Your face is devoid of any emotion. "We all have our demons. Even you can't argue with that."

Your jaw clenches. Everyone had warned you. They all said he would try to worm his way into your head to figure you out. All the reviews, the gossip, everything. It was a big fat 'I told you so'. You give a pitiful laugh at the situation. "You know, everyone told me that you would pull this stunt."

He seems confused by your statement. "And what is that?"

"That you'd get inside my head and try to figure me all out or whatever. You already know I googled you beforehand, what everyone says about your methods. By now I assume you've done a little research yourself. I promise you there is nothing exciting here," you scoff and point to yourself.

"You would be correct in your assumption." You chew at your cheek as he starts. "I do know some of what happened in your past. Yet I also know that society likes to dilute the truth into something either more palatable, more entertaining, for people to consume greedily. What I want to know is what you have faced. How you have not allowed the experience to overcome you so much so that your humanity is erased like the characters I lecture on."

Eyes closing of their own volition you are thrown back in time to that night so many years ago. You didn't talk about it anymore. Bitsy knew of course, but that was the extent.

Laszlo waits. He knows this is likely to push you over the edge if your history with him means anything. Quite frankly, anyone would be tossed to their limit at his interrogation had they gone through what you had. John always told him that he needed to work on his bedside manner; that he had a habit of coming on too strong in his pursuit of learning the intricacies of the human mind. But your earlier comment about being sent to a so-called 'nuthouse' rubbed him the wrong way. It left a bad taste in his mouth. He needed to know. He needed to understand.

Laszlo can imagine the reprimand that he would receive from John and Sara for this. Just as he considers apologizing for his intrusion you open your eyes.

"She was fine. None of us suspected anything was wrong. I came home from having dinner with some… boy, and she had locked herself in the bathroom. She- she must have started over the sink and moved to sit on the side of the tub. She was hunched inside it when I got the door open. I pulled her out. Blood was… everywhere." Your voice is clinical as you explain.

"After, I shut down. So I checked myself into a psych ward a few days later when I couldn't get the feel of her blood off my hands. It's slippery, you know. And it smells. You wouldn't think so but it does." You clear your throat. "I did the therapy, took the meds they prescribed, all the standard treatments. Later I started watching true crime documentaries. I'd heard about exposure therapy so I figured the more I saw the gore, the less the image of my dead roommate would bother me. And it did help. The nightmares stopped after a while, I came back to school. I was better, just not the same.” You had watched the passing landscape as you explained. Turning to face him you speak again. “That's why those pictures didn't bother me. They weren't anything I hadn't seen before."

He contemplates you. The discovery and subsequent loss of your friend in this manner would no doubt cause lingering effects to your psyche. A stain that would forever remind you. "I offer my sincerest condolences. I do not presume to know what that would be like to experience, but I am glad you sought help afterwards. To make the choice to alleviate yourself of your own suffering where possible.”

As he says this he realizes that your anger towards the idea of being enslaved to unconscious impulse makes perfect sense. It explains why you focused so much energy on defending your belief in free will. That you have the power to choose how you carry your joy, your anger, your healing. It reminds him of how he held onto his own guilt and hurt, ignoring how it festered within him for so long. He feels as though he needs to share a piece of himself with you.

“I played piano as a child, quite well too. My mother hoped I would someday make a career of it. I vividly remember playing Mozart’s Concerto for Piano No. 20 in D Minor at a holiday party when I was seven years old. It was my favorite to play.... It requires two hands." You finally look at him. "My father...” He pauses to gather himself.

Now it is the doctor that cannot meet your eyes. As you listen you feel your confusion grow. How could he have been a talented pianist if he only had full use of his left hand? Unless..., the realization dawns on you just as he continues, his words slow.

“My father had two sides. One loving and the other brutal, the two often coexisting. It was something as trivial as putting me to bed, I recall... A game of tug of war. We were laughing…” He inhales a sharp breath. Already you can feel the tears begin to blur your vision. “I don't remember if he was drunk or if I said something that offended him. He must have pulled my arm behind my back.” Laszlo exhales shakily. “In small children, fractures can often affect…” he trails off, unable to finish. You can hear how he barely holds himself together.

Your heart aches for the broken man that sits in front of you. He never let on how much his arm bothered him, at least not within your presence. Suddenly you don’t see him as this rude, insufferable, obsessive man, but instead as someone that spends his life trying to protect himself. He projects his own anger and hurt so that he may, just for a minute, forget about his own demons. He wants to help others even when he feels he cannot bear to help himself.

But unlike you, he has to live with the physical reminder of his past every day of his life.

You stand and move to sit on his right side. Before allowing yourself to think too much of your actions, you place your hand atop his own, curling your fingers around his palm and squeezing delicately. You don’t bother wiping away the tears on your cheeks. “I’m so sorry, Laszlo;” the whisper is barely heard above the sound of the train. A second passes where you fear you have overstepped and offended him by touching the affected limb. When his thumb tightens against the backs of your fingers you know he is not. He holds you in place.

“You asked me how I kept my humanity. How does anyone really? We learn to take what we get and we carry it in a bag. Sometimes you have to drag the damn thing behind you. But eventually the weight gets less and less if you allow yourself to move forward, even if it’s still there with you all the time. I dealt with what happened years ago and it does still haunt me. It’s easier now than it was, but… I- I suppose I’ve learned from you too. Sitting in those lectures and hearing you talk. We can either let it haunt us for the rest of our lives… or we can accept it… and use the memory of our pain to help ourselves and others.”

“I’m not sure the choice is entirely in our hands.” His tone is mournful.

You turn to smile at him through your tears. His own eyes are bloodshot. “I disagree. If it weren’t, if we didn’t have the freedom to choose that, we’d all be murderers.”

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