#*that reason was because she was allowing her hatred of Kang

[icarusinstatic]

So, what would y’all think about this: Loki and Mobius have a kid together (Kang stole her ASAP, more on that later) that Mobius didn’t know about and Loki was made to forget (Kang, you bitch). The thing is, since she was conceived and born outside of time she has no variants across the multiverse. She is singular, but that doesn’t mean she hasn’t live many lives. In fact whenever Kang felt that she had to learn a lesson or when she had been disobedient (she’s a child of Loki, it happened a lot) he placed her consciousness inside of someone who had been meant to die and allowed her to live a life in a small branch of the timeline that was immediately destroyed as soon as her life ‘ended’ for real on that branch. Sometimes years would have been allowed to pass other times only weeks or months. But all those lives had one thing in common. In each one of them she was murdered.

The thing is. For all that Kang called her his ‘child’ his main motivation for stealing her was to act as a backup for when he eventually died. If he couldn’t live on, at least his mission to keep his other variants from destroying the multiverse would live on.

And he was destined to die. He had seen to that. As soon as he decided to take this child of Loki from her parents his fate was sealed. There were thousands of ways it could happen but other than the few times Mobius was the one to get the drop on him - the person who killed him was loki themself.

One does not steal a child of Loki and escape the consequences after all.

To be clear though; Kang did care for this stolen child and if the kindest timeline to her was due to being ended by this Sylvie (a Loki who refused the title of Loki) - then that was an easy sacrifice to make.

[wave2tyun]

killshot | ☆

pairing: taehyun x fem!reader

genre: spy!au, enemies to lovers, fake dating, slow burn, suggestive, a bit of fluff and angst

summary: your life seemed to have taken a turn for the worse the minute kang taehyun stepped foot into the spy agency you worked at. wanting to take on a challenge to prove yourself worthy of the top position, your plans were turned upside down with his addition to the mission. you didn’t think things could get any worse, until they stated one clear, mandatory condition: the two of you had to pretend you were a couple.

warnings: lots of swearing, alcohol consumption, the reader gets tipsy (twice), mentions of death, guns and bombs (there’s nothing explicit though), the presence of an annoying drunk man | let me know if i missed something!!

word count: 9.7k

a/n: this was just a silly little idea that i got during a car drive asdbfhj whenever i repost fics i always kind of get the urge to say "omg this was one of my favorite fics to write" - i think it's because i end up getting so attached to the little universes that i create and then look back on them fondly; with this one, i really really mean it when i say those words (maybe because it's also longer). when i first posted it i actually felt like i gave birth cause it got SO MUCH LONGER than i anticipated ASBHJDS

☆ = repost from my old blog!!

"no."

"hear me out-"

"i'm not hearing anybody out. i'm doing this alone- just like we intended from the start" you hissed.

"y/n, we went over this already" irene pinched the bridge of her nose, sighing "the enemy has changed their plan of action, so we need to change it too. it's not safe for you to go alone anymore"

"that i can understand. but him-" you pointed an accusatory finger to the man in front of you “why does he need to be involved in this? there have to be other suitable agents for this mission”

“trust me, darling, if i could do this alone, i would” he replied bitterly, rolling his eyes.

“listen you two- these orders came directly from the head office. they want you to work on this, not anybody else- and there’s nothing that i can do to change this.” irene crossed her arms. she was completely tired of the way you were both behaving- just like two kids continuously throwing sand in each other’s eyes.

“fine.” you gave in, biting your tongue and swallowing your pride. there was no use being stubborn if the head office was involved, the best thing you could do in this situation was to choose being the bigger person.

irene raised an eyebrow at taehyun, waiting for his response as well.

“fine-“ he repeated after you, throwing daggers towards your direction. you were glad to know the feeling of disgust was mutual.

“finally” irene exclaimed, letting out a big sigh “took you long enough. here’s the modified plan papers. remember- there’s no way i’m allowing you to back out anymore”

you took the small stack of papers from her hands, skimming through the text. gather the gadgets and weapons, bla bla bla, disarm the bomb hidden at the event, bla bla bla, protect france’s president, bla bla bla, disguise yourself as a couple- wait.

“are you fucking kidding me- am i reading this right?” you spat out, eyes almost popping out at the sight. you went over the passage again and again, hoping that you had simply misread it- but there it was, black ink on white paper, the word written clear as day: “couple”

irene massaged her temples with her hands “in order for this mission to be carried out with ease, we need you to act as a cou-“

“no” you both said in unison, cutting her off.

you side-eyed taehyun, somehow feeling offended that he also declined the proposal right away. you knew you had your reasons to not accept that condition- but why was he saying “no”?

kang fucking taehyun- his name alone felt like poison on your tongue.

but it wasn’t like your hatred towards him was unjustified- in fact, you couldn't remember if there was even one second- let alone one day- where him just breathing didn’t make you feel like plotting murder. one day, he just strutted into the agency, acting like he owned the place. he was quick to gain respect from his superiors, his charms alone making it easier for him to receive more complicated missions- and better equipment. you being mad was an understatement. why? just because he was a man, he had it all easy. he has been in the agency for just one year, and he has already surpassed you in ranks, all of the hard work you’ve been putting in for years going down the drain.

you’ve been relentlessly trying to regain your honorable place in the agency. kang taehyun was quick to catch on to your little act, and he wasn’t one to back off easily either- resulting in the two of you being at each other’s necks every second. you viewed this mission as what could have possibly been ‘your redemption arc’. the universe somehow always found a way to get him involved in your business. but this time, you weren’t gonna let him steal your spotlight- not again. you needed to find a way to secure the number one place in rankings like you used to, and you were willing to do whatever it took to feel that glory one more time, even if that meant cooperating with the kang taehyun.

“if you die, i’ll kill you” you hissed.

“big words coming from someone who stands on a chair to reach the top shelves” he fought back, unfazed by your threat. your mouth opened at this accusation, when did he even catch you doing that?

“you piece of-“

“enough” irene sighed, moving to stand between the two of you “you’re gonna bring back my migraines if you keep on acting like that. can’t you treat each other as normal people do? just this once- please? you’re only making this harder for yourselves”

you sighed, rubbing the nape of your neck. irene was a sweetheart, she didn’t deserve to be the victim of your petty fight “when do we have to start?”

her eyes seemed to light up a bit, relieved by your change in attitude “as soon as possible” she skimmed through her notes again “the earliest flight is in 3 days- how about it?”

“that’s okay for me” you said. you silently glanced over at taehyun, who rolled his eyes, uncrossing his arms “guess i’m in too”.

・・・・・・・・・・・・・・

5 hours.

that was the amount of time you had to endure sitting next to taehyun on the flight. you could handle this, you tried to tell yourself. you’ve been in much worse situations during some of your missions. in the end, it didn’t necessarily mean that the two of you had to interact during that time. you could just sleep the whole flight away and not have to exchange a word with taehyun once.

wrong.

kang taehyun just seemed to love seeing you suffer, in any way, shape or form. it had you seriously contemplating whether he was some kind of sadist. you thought you could at least go through check in and security without any unpleasant incidents happening, but you were wrong- so painfully wrong.

you arrived two hours early to the airport, wanting to get done with the whole process as fast as possible then hide from taehyun at the food court until it was time for you to board the plane. however, two minutes after you took your place in the check-in line, your peace was disrupted.

“you’re early- were you that eager to see me, sweetheart?”

your eye was twitching at the sound of the nickname. you didn’t even have to turn your head to the right to know who was next to you.

“why did it have to be you here at this hour?” you grumbled.

“crazy- it’s almost as if we’re on the same flight” he rolled his eyes “don’t even think about going to the back of the line- we have the same last name on the tickets so we shouldn’t go separately anyway”

you loosened your grip on the suitcase and bit your cheek, it was like he knew your exact thoughts at the moment. the whole thing was all too corny for you- why did the company have to change your name and give you new documents? just because you were ‘a couple’ didn’t mean that you had to be married as well.

security didn’t exactly go smooth either- as if the whole process wasn’t already stressful enough. you should have been suspicious the moment taehyun let you sit in front of him at the line. at that moment, you just brushed it off and thought nothing of it, but when the metal detector went off as you were walking through- that’s when it all clicked.

that little fucker slipped one of his rings in your pocket.

a string of unholy words was running wildly in your mind as the security patted you down to search for any suspicious items. you wished you could jump on him and wipe that grin off his face. he somehow felt the need to embarrass you even further once the ring had been found. he put on a charming smile as he rubbed the nape of his neck, looking up at the security lady “so sorry for my wife- she tends to be quite clumsy, i told her before to check well before walking away from me”

the lady melted down in an instant, letting out a bunch of ‘it’s okay’ before handing you back the ring. he felt the need to make such a scene and for what? to feed his ego? you didn’t bother to wait until he was through with security as well. you gathered your things from the tray as fast as you could, storming past all the other people to get further away from him.

you browsed all the shops (sometimes even hiding in the dressing rooms) until you couldn’t avoid taehyun any longer. you didn’t talk to him once you met up again, even though you knew that it didn’t affect him anyway. nonetheless, taehyun ensured that your day would have a cherry on top- by stealing the one and only window seat.

and you?

you made sure to spill your water on him during turbulence.

that seemed to be enough to make him stop bothering you throughout the flight. he slept away as you played sudoku on your phone, too paranoid to fall asleep yourself in case he would wake up with new ideas in mind.

・・・・・・・・・・・・・・

after making sure that your bag smacked taehyun’s head when you took it from the upper storage, you both went to retrieve your luggage then headed out to find a taxi and go to your accommodation.

valets, chandeliers, grand paintings adoring the walls, the hotel seemed quite fancy. you weren’t really used to this kind of treatment from your agency, it was the least they could do for all the headaches you were going to endure throughout the mission.

the receptionist handed you the small paper sleeve containing the key cards. you furrowed your brows as you opened it, peering inside. there were 2 cards in there, but for the exact same hotel room. you instantly expressed your confusion “why is there just one r-“ taehyun kicked your foot, continuing to smile at the receptionist as you bit your tongue to hold back a scream. “is there anything else i can help you with?” she inquired.

“i’m pretty sure that’s it, thank you” taehyun answered before you could open your mouth to speak. he took hold of your arm, flashing the receptionist another fake smile before dragging you along with him towards the elevator.

“don’t touch me” you broke free from his grip “what the hell was that about?”

taehyun pressed the floor number on the keypad “are you that fucking dense? he sighed exasperatedly “we’re a couple- remember? we need to act like one, so stop having these unnecessary slip-ups”

‘stupid cover’ you cursed in your mind the person who had been in charge for outlining the plans for your mission. out of all the possible lies they could have made you hold on to- this is what they went for. it was almost like they did this on purpose to annoy you.

ding.

you took hold of your suitcase again, following behind taehyun as you searched for your room “besides- the hotel isn’t scruffy this time, their budget seems to be pretty high for once. so, they might have booked us a suite, not just a single room” he continued, trudging the door open.

your feet were frozen, not moving an inch from the doorway “taehyun- this is not a fucking suite” you snarled, slowly turning your head in his direction.

“why are you talking as if it’s my fault?” taehyun snapped back. he entered the room, bumping his shoulders against yours as you refused to go further in.

“well if you hadn’t been so quick to silence me at the reception- maybe this wouldn’t have been a problem” you pushed your suitcase in, putting your hands on your hips.

“and risk blowing our cover? yeah- what a great plan that would have been” he huffed.

“there’s no way i’m sharing a bed with you” you hissed

“don’t worry- it’s not a pleasure for me either sweetheart. it’s either sleeping on the floor- or with me. your choice”

taehyun didn’t seem like he would ever consider giving up his spot on the bed- but neither did you. you weren’t going to settle for back pain as he snored away on the soft mattress.

so, you laid down on the bed, as far away as you could from taehyun. you were sitting so close to the edge that you were on the verge of falling off, but you couldn't even stand the mere thought of being in such close proximity to him. the thought of his arm touching yours made your skin crawl. 

yet, despite breathing in the same room as taehyun, you somehow managed to get what was probably the best sleep of your life. keeping your eyes closed just for one moment more, you held the blanket closer to you, enjoying the warmth it provided, snuggling your face deeper into the pillow beneath you. but the pillow wasn't as soft as you remembered when you put your head down to sleep last night. instead, it was hard, and somehow hot to the touch. confused, you brought a hand up and pressed down on it, slightly squeezing it, then removed it as if you had just gotten burnt when you were met with the feeling of bare skin on skin.

"if you wanted to touch me that badly you could have just asked, love" a raspy voice came from beneath you.

"what the fuck-" you shouted as you got up and finally opened your eyes. you squinted as you adjusted to the bright light coming from the sun.

kang taehyun was sitting right next to you, bare chest exposed and a playful smirk plastered on his face.

"how did we- when did you even take your shirt off?"

"are you always this loud in the morning?" he asked, ignoring your questions. his hair was a ruffled mess, slightly puffy face indicating that he hadn't been awake for that long either.

you still looked at him expectingly, waiting for him to answer. he huffed, rolling his eyes "you snuggled with your burning limbs close to me as you slept. i got overwhelmingly hot so i took off my shirt. there- simple as that"

"why didn't you just push me off or something" you asked. it wasn’t typical for him to act like this.

what taehyun said was indeed the truth. he couldn’t stand you- yes, but he wasn’t an asshole. he couldn’t find it in him to wake you up or pry you off him, as he didn’t want to wake up in the morning to you being groggy. therefore, he was left with only one option: enduring it.

pushing your question aside once more, taehyun got up from the bed, stretching as he made his way to the bathroom, he stopped right before getting past the door to speak "did you know you talk in your sleep? you seemed to enjoy it, i didn't want to ruin the fun for you." he snickered, disappearing into the other room.

you stood there with your jaw hanging, unable to form any kind of comeback to argue. was there even a way to recover from that? when you heard the shower running, you took a pillow from the bed, burying your face into it and silently screaming. you wanted to dig a hole for yourself at least 20 meters underground.

after regaining your composure, you got ready so that you and taehyun could get started on today’s task: gathering the necessary weapons and equipment. irene informed you about some namjoon guy they had a contract with. he apparently sold any kind of gear you would ever need for a mission: from smoke bombs to lethal poison- he had it all. you went to the outskirts of the city searching for a shabby cabin (not suspicious at all), the storage hidden away in an underground system there.

“are you sure this is the right place?” you asked taehyun, eyeing the old rusty door. the whole place just screamed ‘murder’, how exactly did your agency even come to find out about the guy? maybe you didn’t want to know.

“the coordinates match up with what irene sent us- so yeah, probably. try not to hold my hand if you’re so scared” he chuckled.

you ignored his childish remark, going past him to open the heavy door. the inside didn’t match up with the exterior, it was surprisingly warm and cozy. a man with purple hair and a black dress shirt was sitting on an armchair, book in hand. you assumed it was namjoon.

“oh- hello?” you didn’t exactly know how to approach him, you felt bad for barging in without even knocking.

his eyes glanced up from the book “ah” he got up “finally, i was worried irene didn’t send you the right location” he flashed you a dimpled smile. for a man who owned over one thousand weapons, you didn’t expect him to be this...cute?

taehyun bit his cheek “so you’re namjoon?”

“yes, and i already know who you two are. come on- follow me”

namjoon lead you towards an elevator, hidden away from curious eyes in a crowded closet. the ride down seemed almost endless, but that’s how it needed to be. if one single gunshot could be heard from the surface, his entire business could risk being destroyed.

“i’ve got a couple of things for you to try, as well as some accessories irene asked me to give you” namjoon put down a box on a table. it wasn’t anything out of the ordinary- laser pen, tracking devices, coat button cameras, the usual. the guns weren’t exactly essential for your mission, they were more of a safety precaution. either way, you still had to practice using them.

getting into the designated practice area, you and taehyun each had a target to hit. you needed at least 5 good shots in a row to be deemed skilled enough for the weapon. taehyun’s first try was perfect, meanwhile yours barely hit the target.

“seems like someone’s rusty”

“beginner’s luck” you mumbled.

giving it another go, you ended up with the same result. the exact thing happened the 3rd try as well. you frowned, it wasn’t usually like this for you, and taehyun’s cocky smirk only made your blood boil further.

“nervous?” he chuckled

“i’m just warming up- i need to get used to it” you got back into your shooting stance, putting your finger on the trigger.

“take your time, darling, hell’s happy to wait for you”

you missed again.

“can you just shut up for one fucking minute?” you huffed. you didn’t want to let taehyun get to you, but even when he didn’t open his mouth to speak you could still hear his voice in your mind, mocking you.

“i can give you something else if you want to-“ namjoon tried to help, not knowing he only angered you further.

“i need him out of sight- not another weapon” you quickly dismissed him “can i get a private practice room?”

“practicing in private won’t fix your lack of talent” you heard taehyun whisper.

if looks could kill, taehyun would be on the floor the second those words left his mouth “if i point this gun towards your direction i’ll make sure that it won’t be a miss” you fumed.

namjoon was clearly taken aback by the tension in the room. desperate to diffuse the situation, he kindly asked taehyun to look around the other areas as you practiced a few more rounds with him.

you felt bad for the guy, he was a victim to yet another one of your fights with taehyun. you kept the rest of your interactions with him short, wanting to get back to the hotel as soon as possible.

“look- i’ll buy you ice cream, will that make it better?” taehyun asked exasperatedly.

“i’m not a fucking child” you snarled. the only thing up until now that taehyun had managed to do successfully was ridiculing you- and you were fed up with it. did he think that some ice cream was going to erase all those embarrassing moments he had been putting you through?

“well what do you want me to do then?” he sighed.

“i don’t know- maybe stop acting like an asshole? like you’re better than me?”

taehyun stopped the car on the side of the road, his hands gripping the steering wheel harder “i’m not acting like an asshole” he turned his head to look at you.

“yes, you are- you did that the whole day and you are doing that right now” you said in utter disbelief. his snarky attitude was tipping you over.

“get out” he spoke firmly, breaking eye contact with you.

“what?”

taehyun didn’t know how much longer he could be with you in the car without losing his temper even more “i said get out” he repeated once again, closing his eyes “go on and find the way to the hotel yourself”

“fine” you scoffed. you grabbed your purse and slammed the car door as hard as you could once you got out of the vehicle. taehyun wasted no time getting back on the road. finally, he could breathe again.

“jerk” you screamed. what a great time to wear heels this was. you made your way to the side walk, shielding your eyes from the sun with your hands as you looked around, trying to recall any familiar surroundings. with every step you took, it felt like your foot was pressed into a hot piece of lego. you had been wearing those damn heels all day, and now the agonising pain was finally starting to kick in.

taehyun couldn’t help but constantly steal glances at you from the rearview mirror, watching as you struggled to walk without your feet wobbling. sighing, he waited until he could take a turn to go back and pick you up. maybe you weren’t the only one that acted like a kid.

getting back to the same spot he just left you at barely 2 minutes ago, taehyun stopped the car. yet you weren’t anywhere to be found. he got out to search the area better- nothing.

“shit” he mumbled under his breath.

taehyun couldn’t stay still as he waited for you to return. of course, he got to the hotel faster because of the car, but what was taking you so long to arrive? the thought of him ruining the mission because of a petty fight was tormenting his mind. he didn’t want to lose his job at the agency because of you. he kept on walking back and forth from the couch to the door, looking through the peephole for any sign of you coming down the hallway. and just as he was about to check again, for probably the 30th time that night, he heard knocking on the door. it was you- it had to be you. after all, the only other room key had remained with him, and there was no way someone else would disturb him at this ungodly hour.

taehyun cleared his voice, erasing any sign of worry on his face before opening the door, apology already on the tip of his tongue.

"y/n, i'm sorry-" taehyun spoke as soon as he saw you in the doorway, reaching his hand out to take your purse.

"fuck off" you spat out, slapping his hand away from you. you went straight to the bathroom and locked the door, not in the mood to hear any of his excuses. you stood with your back against the door, burying your face in your hands. you felt so tired and sick of having to deal with taehyun’s attitude. but you weren't gonna let him be the one to steal the spotlight from your mission- not again.

taehyun sighed heavily in front of the door, putting his hand down from knocking, choosing to simply let you be for a while. you had all the right to be mad, and he knew that.

you took a shower to cool off, refusing to look taehyun in the eyes, or even in his direction at all, as you got ready to go to sleep.

taehyun put his finger on the lamp's button, letting out those words that had been bugging him all night "just so you know- i did go back for you today, but i couldn't find you anymore. maybe that's gonna convince you that i really meant it when i said sorry" taehyun flicked off the light, huffing, pitch black darkness taking over the room.

you stayed silent, with your back turned to him, still too stubborn to accept his apology. 'he just wants to go to bed with a clean conscience' you tried to convince yourself. ・・・・・・・・・・・・・・

you were grateful to have woken up with your own personal space, unlike your first night there. taehyun wasn’t even on his side of the bed, the sound of the water running indicating that he had already beat you to the bathroom. you turned over to the side, ready to enjoy those few minutes of peace.

“huh” you brought a hand to your face, feeling something on your forehead. it was a sticky note. you rubbed your eyes, trying to make sense of what was written on the small piece of paper.

‘there’s ice cream in the freezer’

“what...” you mumbled, how did ice cream have anything to do with- oh.

you fought back a chuckle. so, the great taehyun couldn’t find the strength to own up to his actions and say the words ‘sorry’ a second time. still, you accepted his silent apology, going over to the freezer to get your hands on the sweet treat. how could you ever say no to something free?

taehyun got out of the bathroom as you still nibbled on the ice cream sandwich, the steam and heat instantly invading the room. you looked up from the piece of food in your hand, almost dropping it once your eyes laid on him. taehyun sat in the middle of the room, chest and sculpted abs on full display with a few water droplets adoring his skin from his still dripping hair.

“what are you blushing for? it’s not the first time you’re seeing me like this” he smirked.

“idiot- it’s the heat. your shower transformed the room into a whole sauna” you meekly tried to defend yourself, not wanting to give him any satisfaction. you cursed your cheeks for reacting like this well before your mind could even comprehend the situation.

“oh- so you’re talking to me again. i take it you forgive me?” he leaned against the door.

“don’t get ahead of yourself kang taehyun” you scoffed “it’s gonna take more than just an ice cream for me to fully forgive you”

“i know, you did tell me yesterday that ‘you’re not a child’. just thought it might sweeten that sour attitude of yours” he huffed.

“whatever- let me get changed, then we’ll get in touch with irene” you said as you walked over to your suitcase to grab some clean clothes.

“i already talked to her. she said there’s nothing we have to do for the day. we just need to wait for the big event tomorrow.”

“huh- you talked to her? when?” you raised your eyebrows at him. you could swear you hadn’t heard a single sound all morning.

“yeah- while you were busy snoring” he chuckled.

you scoffed at his reply “as if you’re a saint while you’re sleeping” there he went again with his ridiculous accusations.

“well- unlike you, i haven’t received any complaints from others” he winked at you.

“really? then here’s your first one- you’re loud as hell” you slammed the bathroom door. that wink and his cocky grin were enough to bring back the annoyance he always seemed to provoke within you.

taehyun loudly knocked as you were busy brushing your teeth “how long are you gonna stay in there? i have something to ask”

you rolled your eyes, taking the toothbrush out of your mouth to reply “i’ll be out in 5 minutes” you shouted back. you didn’t know whether it was curiosity or fear taking over you from his words.

taehyun was still in front of the door when you opened it to get out.

“wanna take advantage of the activities here? it’s not like we’re paying for any of this- the agency is. plus- we have the day off anyway” taehyun shrugged his shoulders. his proposal didn’t sound bad at all. you could definitely use some sort of relaxation, your whole body was still aching from walking in heels yesterday.

you put your hands over your mouth, gasping exaggeratedly “finally, i can’t believe there’s good ideas coming out of your mouth” you were actually excited for once about one of taehyun’s suggestions. this was your chance to detach yourself from all the stress, the mission, and most importantly- him.

“when do i not have good ideas?” taehyun brought a hand to his chest. he sounded offended by your statement.

“i’m not going to answer that.” you replied shortly.

grabbing your bathrobes from the reception, you and taehyun headed towards the hotel’s spa facility. the area was filled with all sorts of natural plants and bamboo furniture, the meditation music being accompanied by the quiet sound from the mini artificial waterfall in the middle of it all. having such a packed schedule all the time, you never got any opportunities to spoil yourself in places like this. the anticipation and excitement were making your heart bubble up with joy, but your smile quickly dropped once you arrived in the massage room.

“taehyun, why didn’t you mention the hotel activities being couple activities” you hissed. standing in the doorway, you looked in terror at the swarm of lovey dovey pairs sitting on yoga mats in front of you.

“did you think i made the proposal knowing that?” he scoffed.

“well i can’t seem to understand how you overlooked such a major detail??”

“listen- the poster said couple massages. how the hell was i supposed to know that they’re making us do the work for each other? i just thought we’d both get a massage done at the same time”

“you must be the kangs, welcome” the host greeted you “come on, sit down. we were just getting started with a simple shoulder massage” she pointed to the last empty mat in the room, then motioned for you to begin.

taehyun’s eyelids fluttered shut as you awkwardly placed your hands on his shoulders, the material of the robe doing almost nothing to hide the feeling of the rock hard muscles underneath. you grimaced as you pressed your fingers down, trying to reminisce the movements you’d use while preparing pizza dough.

“you’re doing it wrong” he deadpanned, opening his eyes to make direct eye contact with you.

“shut the hell up”

you didn’t know what you were doing- yes. but were you going to admit that to taehyun? absolutely not. rolling your eyes, you continued to clumsily massage the tense muscles.

“i can’t feel a goddamn thing” he complained again.

“how about now?” you pinched his skin between your thumb and your index finger, using as much pressure as you could. taehyun’s face distorted in pain as he crumbled beneath you “for fuck’s sake-“ he grabbed your wrists, stopping you from provoking him even more suffering “how are you so bad at this?”

frustrated, you moved your hands away from his body “if you think you’re that great, why don’t you give it a shot?”

“i will give it a shot” he snarled.

the host approached the two of you just as taehyun placed his hands on you “what a lovely couple” she smiled. nudging taehyun, she whispered one more thing before walking away “remember, use your hands gently, like you’re touching the most delicate petal”

taehyun’s ears turned a bright shade of red at the sound of that. he bit his lip so hard trying not to laugh at her words, you were surprised he didn’t end up drawing blood.

“close your eyes, petal” he snickered.

you snorted at the nickname, doing as he said regardless. taehyun’s hands were surprisingly warm. he did his best mimicking the actions from the couples around you, his long slender fingers massaging your muscles with such care, you could feel all the built-up tension melting away.

“wait- this is kinda nice” you spoke quietly.

“told you so”

you hoped taehyun wouldn’t catch that, but of course, he did. you opened one eye, tempted to wipe that cocky smirk off his face. getting ahold of yourself, you chose not to, you never knew when taehyun would treat you this nicely again. you sighed, allowing yourself to enjoy the feeling. this was the least he could do to pay you back for all the headaches he had caused you so far throughout the mission.

you did make a few other attempts to give taehyun a massage, but even with the host’s instructions, he was never satisfied. in the end, he gave up, preferring to do all the work himself instead of letting you touch him again. he probably left the spa room feeling more tense than when he had arrived, the only thing bringing him some sort of consolation being the free bottle of wine at the end of the lesson- which he opened as soon as you came back to your hotel room.

after getting changed, you sat down next to taehyun on the bed, noticing only one wine filled glass on the table “aren’t you gonna share that?”

“after all the pain i’ve went through today? don’t think so” he replied before taking a sip of the crimson beverage.

“don’t be a jerk” you snapped back “i tried my best”

taehyun sighed heavily, grabbing the other clean glass in the room to pour you some of the wine. you muttered a quick ‘thanks’ before taking it from his hands, downing the liquid almost immediately.

“what the fuck are you doing” he grabbed your wrist “take it easy- our mission is tomorrow, i don’t think you want to wake up with a headache” there was a hint of worry hidden in his stern voice.

“a bit more won’t hurt- i just want to sleep well tonight” you replied. your hand was already reaching for the bottle to pour another one. taehyun simply rolled his eyes, hoping that you’d stop after the seccond glass. yet- you repeated your actions, downing the glass and going for the bottle right after. this time, taehyun snatched it away from your hands and hid it behind the bed.

“don’t ruin the fun-“ you furrowed your brows “just give me the bottle”

you stood up, towering over taehyun as you extended your arm. he wasn’t expecting you to put up such a fight, but his reflexes were sharp- he took hold of your arm quickly, making you lose your balance and stumble over him. his hand came down to your waist to hold you as you landed in his lap, not allowing you to slip away anymore. you looked at him with wide eyes, your loud heartbeat drumming against his chest. “don’t make me repeat myself” he muttered.

“or what?” you provoked him further. your eyes shifted their focus on his lips, sitting centimeters apart from yours. you had never paid attention before to how soft they looked- so soft and rosy, your mind couldn’t help but wander off and think about how they would feel on yours. taehyun seemed to become nervous underneath your gaze, his breathing became ragged, hand gripping your waist slightly tighter. he licked his lips before moving his face closer to yours, yet still not enough to fully close the gap. your eyelids fluttered shut, and he smirked at your action, his thumb coming to graze your lower lip slowly.

“or you might just make me lose myself completely” he breathed out. his gaze was still fixated on your lips, only tempting him further to give in, to let go of everything that had been holding him back until now from accepting that it wasn’t hatred he felt upon seeing you, or even hearing your name. he had been convinced that you hating him meant that he was supposed to feel the same, but he couldn’t- and he could barely even fake it anymore. especially now, when you somehow managed to completely break down his guard in mere seconds. thinking this through, taehyun chose to back away. he didn’t have the confirmation whether it was your actual feelings leading your actions, or just the alcohol in your system.

he cleared his throat, removing his hands from your body and putting that usual cold façade back on “like i’ve said, our mission is tomorrow. you should probably go to bed” his eyes didn’t meet yours when you opened them to look at him again.

your gaze shifted to the floor, you were unable to hide the underlying disappointment in your voice “yeah- you’re right”. you hesitated a bit before finally separating yourself from him, the warmth of his body gone just as the excitement that was beginning to take over your heart. you put your head down on the pillow, the sound of more wine getting poured in a glass being heard as you closed your eyes and drifted off to sleep.

・・・・・・・・・・・・・・ "your tie is lopsided, let me fix that" you walked over to taehyun. there was just one hour left until the event started. the atmosphere in the room was suffocating, to say the least.

taehyun scoffed upon hearing that "i can definitely do a better job than you" yet, he didn't make any movement to stop you from touching him or his clothes “everything is just a competition for you… isn’t it?” you said bitterly, your eyes were fixated on his chest, his tie in your hand. 

“isn’t it for you, too?” taehyun asked. he immediately regretted his question, the words seemed to roll off his tongue as an automatic response. he peered into your eyes, although he was hesitant to hear your answer. you paused for a moment before continuing, refusing to look up and meet his gaze "maybe i don't want it to be anymore"

you went back to the mirror, trying to look busy as you "fixed" your makeup, although you had already ensured it was perfect with each step you did.

taehyun didn't say anything to that. it wasn't the time he could let himself be swayed by his emotions. you were both at the peak of your mission, where high attention was demanded and no mistakes were allowed to be made. he cleared his throat before speaking, trying to change the conversation from the sensitive topic "you look good" "thanks" you looked down, playing a bit more with the lipstick in your hand before stuffing it in your purse "we should go" "yeah- we should" he repeated after you, grabbing the spare card for your hotel room.

the entire venue was filled with well-known people from the political field, as well as celebrities. the event had been long planned to celebrate the president’s birthday. however, he started to have a rising suspicion that someone was after him, wanting to backstab him so that they could steal his position, which is how you got into the play. your team was able to pinpoint the enemy’s plan of action due to their sloppy preparation. they talked freely around Élysée Palace about their intention, completely unaware of the mics hidden all around the building. they were going to infiltrate the office and place a bomb there, wiping out the president without putting themselves at much risk.

being nervous was an understatement. it’s been long since you’ve been assigned such an important mission- way too long. the fact that you didn’t know whether you were going to make direct contact with the enemy didn’t help either.

taehyun seemed to be glued to your side, not letting you go once. he held you by the waist the whole time you were walking around, searching for your table. his eyes were trained on you, not allowing the disgusting rich men in the room to think that they can lay a finger on you, not even for one second.

“why do you keep on holding me so close?” you wondered aloud.

“we need to act like a couple- did you forget that again?”

“that doesn’t mean i’m not allowed to walk on my own” you said trying to break yourself free yourself from his grip. but taehyun stopped you before you could fully do so, he grabbed your wrist, bringing your back flushed against his chest. he dipped down to whisper in your ear “sweetheart, let’s not make a scene now- shall we?” he twirled you around, swaying your body to the rhythm of the music to disguise your actions as natural.

“now- let’s discuss. when do you want to put our plan into action?” he leaned down to whisper once again. his voice sent shivers down your spine.

“not yet- we haven’t been here for long and leaving so early would raise suspicion” you muttered.

“then- how about a drink?” taehyun brought you closer, not breaking eye contact with you.

you nodded “a drink sounds good” just like the ‘massage’, there was no way you could turn down something you didn’t have to pay for yourself.

taehyun spun you around once more before heading off to the bar. you continued the search for your table, settling down on one of the chairs as you waited for him.

“what is a princess like you doing all alone?” a sleazy man approached you, reeking of sweat and alcohol. your senses were instantly on high alert, you were praying that taehyun wouldn’t take much longer to return.

“i’m not alone- i’m just waiting for someone” you tried to dismiss him, hoping that he would walk away and leave you alone. but a man’s confidence seems to skyrocket when they drink, so of course, he didn’t back down so easily.

“say, why won’t you have a drink with me while you wait?” his hand was in motion, inching closer to touch your shoulder. it abruptly stopped upon hearing a voice from behind him.

“i’m afraid i’ve already taken care of that, sir” taehyun settled down the drinks on the table before occupying the empty chair next to you. he noticed from far away how uncomfortable you looked and he rushed to get back to you, almost spilling the drinks in the process.

he placed one of his hands on your knee, trying to give the man a subtle hint that he should give up and leave you alone.

“i’m sure one more drink wouldn’t hurt? right, miss?” he continued.

taehyun clicked his tongue, increasingly annoyed by his presence “i’m pretty sure it would, though”

the man’s smile was wiped off his face as soon as taehyun said that, his hand gripped his bottle of beer tighter “why won’t you let her answer, hm?”

you were unsure what to do- you wanted to get rid of him, but you didn’t want to anger him further either. you weren’t supposed to draw any kind of attention towards yourselves, if this were to turn into a big argument, it could damage your mission badly. taehyun’s hand on your knee felt reassuring. at the same time, it made your heart skip a beat whenever he gave it a light squeeze.

“what if i search for you once i finish this first, would that be good?” you did your best fake smile, so that he wouldn’t see directly through your lie. somehow, that answer was good enough for him. he nodded, smiled, then walked away.

taehyun slumped into the chair, taking a sip of the cognac he ordered.

“thank you” you spoke softly “you came just at the right moment”

taehyun’s ears turned red at that “now maybe you understand why i wasn’t letting you go before” he played with the glass in his hand. you bit your lip and nodded, taking a sip of the drink yourself. taehyun had good taste.

you both settled for analysing your surroundings as you drank, making small remarks here and there about the people around you. however, once your glasses were empty, taehyun could already notice the same man approaching your table again. he got up abruptly, taking your wrist and tugging you along with him.

“hey- what’s gotten into you?” you asked. you couldn’t figure out the expression he had on his face, nor his actions. taehyun loudly knocked on the bathroom door. upon hearing no answer, he dragged you in, locking the door after him “weren’t you the one saying that we shouldn’t make a scene?”

“and what was i supposed to do? sit there and watch as he tried to touch you again?” he huffed.

“why are you acting like this? maybe i wouldn’t have minded having a drink with another man” you provoked him further. that wasn’t actually the case- the quick lie slipped past your lips in the heat of the moment, as you were curious to see where he was going to end up with this.

"oh really?" taehyun pressed his tongue against his cheek, crossing his arms. he took a step closer towards you, to which, at first, you chose not to react.

"yes, really."

you tried to sound confident as you talked, but taehyun took note of your pursed lips “you know, lying doesn't suit you, sweetheart." he took another step towards you then another- until you had no choice but to take a few steps back yourself, not stopping until your back hit the wall.

“you know what? i don’t get you-“ you snapped “and i’m tired of trying to figure you out” you pressed a finger to his chest, letting out all those pent-up frustrations that had been tormenting you for the past few days “you keep on giving me these mixed signals- your actions never seem to match your words. how do you even think i felt today? or after last night? do you even care about that?”

you chuckled drily as taehyun remained silent. “why won’t you just give me a clear answer?” your gaze dropped to the floor "if you had the guts, kang taehyun, you would have kissed me"

taehyun's eyes looked sharp, he inched closer to you, bringing your chin up with his hand so that he could look directly into your eyes "you think something is stopping me from doing that right now?" he tilted his head and smirked, slight amusement hidden in his voice.

"then do it" you said firmly, pushing him over the edge.

taehyun slipped his other hand on the small of your back, holding you close so that he could press his mouth on yours, hot and heavy. he wasted no time to lick your lips with his tongue, silently asking for permission to deepen the kiss. you opened your mouth for him, the feeling of his lips and tongue even more intoxicating than the alcohol that you had consumed earlier that night. he lifted one of your legs up, letting his fingers dance along the bare skin that was revealed once your dress slid up with the movement. your body felt hot all over, you hadn't even known how badly you were craving for his touch until you got to experience it. you clasped your hands behind his neck, then dragged them along his back, slightly scratching it with your nails. taehyun groaned at the feeling, hoisting your other leg up as well so that you could wrap them both around his waist. he moved on to your neck, biting at the skin in a slightly hidden area. it was just enough to remind that man and all those other people lurking after you tonight that you were only his. he carried you over to the sink, putting you on the edge of the counter there so that he could have better access to your neck.

there was knocking on the door, followed by the rattling of the doorknob.

"tae-"

taehyun put his index finger over your lips, shushing you as he covered you whole in kisses: your neck, your collarbones, your chest, all the way down to the valley of your breasts, the area exposed by the cleavage of your dress.

"they'll leave" he spoke against your skin.

the image of a ticking clock crossing your mind every now and then filled you with worry and pressure "we should leave too-" taehyun pressed his finger over your lips once more.

"tae-" you breathed out again "-the mission"

"just a bit more” he whispered “there's still time" he looked up at you, those big eyes of his, filled to the brim with desire, pleaded you to let him continue. you grabbed the collar of his shirt, connecting your lips with his again. you sighed in contentment, letting him take control over the kiss. soft gasps and wet lips, his warm mouth on your skin- you got lost into it all, not caring for one second whether your hair or your dress were turning into a mess.

you could barely bring yourself to stop, and when you did, it felt like your cheeks had been set on fire. you hid your face in the crook of taehyun’s neck, breathing heavily against his skin as your brain finally processed what had just happened between the two of you.

you kissed kang taehyun

no-

you made out- with kang taehyun

and you enjoyed it.

in fact, you enjoyed it so much you seriously contemplated ditching the event just to feel his lips on yours for a few moments more.

the rational part of you was stronger “come on- we have a mission to complete” you pressed a quick peck on taehyun’s lips. he smiled, taking his time to fix your appearance before holding your hand and reaching for the door.

“let’s do it” he breathed out.

you sneaked past the security guards and reached the hallway towards the office. you wished you could have collaborated with them, but there was no way you could have known whether the person betraying the president was one of them or not, and you didn’t feel like risking your cover.

your hand reached towards the doorknob, wanting to check whether the door was locked or not. taehyun spoke right before you touched it.

“don’t- it’s dangerous, the bomb could be on the door”

you slowly retracted your hand. you didn’t think this through, and quickly jumped into action. taehyun was right, and you had to find a way to test his theory right before making another attempt at getting in.

you used some of the gadgets irene bought for you, making a small hole inside the wall and pushing through an extendable stick with a camera to look inside.

bingo.

the bomb was placed flushed against the door. had taehyun not stopped you before, you would have both been dead in an instant.

“seems like we’ll have to find another way in” you muttered.

taehyun eyed the outside window “how are your wall climbing skills?”

“not bad at all” you offered to go first, it was probably your best shot for now.

the distance between this window and the one in the office wasn’t that long either, you were just hoping that there weren’t any curious eyes looking up at the building from the garden.

melting away the lock on the window, you succeeded to get in. taehyun followed right after you, jumping inside. the bomb didn’t have a timer on it, the wire connected to the doorknob was what would made it go off. you had to give this one to them, it was pretty smart- this way, they ensured that they had less chances of missing their target.

“any updates?” irene’s voice was heard from your ear piece.

“yeah- we’re in. the enemy’s plan isn’t so bad after all, they just organised it poorly”

“that’s great- but you need to hurry up. you don’t have much time until the guy checking the security cameras alerts the other guards”

“got it” you replied

“so no pressure at all” taehyun laughed as he searched for the necessary tools. the bomb wasn’t unlike anything else you’ve seen before. the only thing you needed to do was follow the procedure carefully, so as not to miss any steps.

taehyun took it upon himself to do it, even though you were both in just as much danger anyway. you helped him out as much as you could, reassuring him that he followed all the steps in the right order and giving him new tools whenever he needed to switch.

“shit-“ you could hear heavy footsteps going up the stairs “they’re onto us, you need to hurry”

“hang on- i’m almost done” taehyun tried his best to remain calm, he couldn’t have his hands trembling at this very moment.

“you either show yourselves, or we’ll have no choice but to barge in” a male voice shouted from behind the door. they were definitely not alone.

“2 more wires” he whispered.

you were growing impatient, but you bit your tongue trying to remain silent, taehyun had to remain concentrated.

“we’ll take your silence as an answer” the man shouted again before starting a countdown.

3, 2, 1-

the door was busted down from its shackles.

the guards remained silent as they were met with...an empty room?

you and taehyun barely managed to make it out on time, and you were now holding your breath as you clung onto the outside wall again. you entered the building through another window from the floor beneath you before they had a chance to inspect the area and potentially see you.

after making sure you were in a safe zone, you reached out to irene again: “we’re done here- we’ll send you that fucker’s fingerprints”

“excellent”

・・・・・・・・・・・・・・

taehyun called the reception as you were taking a cab back to the hotel. he requested 2 bottles of wine for you to drink as a form of celebration. you couldn’t wait to lie down and drink to your heart’s content.

so now- here you were, you sitting in taehyun’s lap as he tried his best not to laugh in your face at your drunken words and actions. it seemed like you couldn’t handle alcohol that well when you were exhausted.

“can you kiss me again?” you asked quietly, closing your eyes before you could even notice his reaction. taehyun was taken aback by your sudden proposal, but nevertheless, fondness took over his eyes in an instant. he cupped your cheeks, bringing your face closer to him until your noses were touching. then, he opted for pressing a soft kiss on the corner of your lips, to which you opened your eyes, cheeks burning at the small gesture. “god- you’re making me go crazy” he spoke softly against your lips. his hand took hold of your wrist, leaving a tender kiss on your pulse point “let’s get you to bed”

you shook your head, dipping your head down to bury your face in his chest as you hugged him tightly. silence filled up the room for a moment before you finally spoke again “maybe it was supposed to be like this from the beginning.” your voice was slightly muffled as you refused to move away from your spot. taehyun ran his hands through your hair “…like what?”

“i don’t know. maybe we were never supposed to hate each other" those words rolled off your tongue softly, your eyes getting heavier with each passing second.

taehyun tucked a few strands behind your ear. your words tugged at his heart, and it was like something clicked for the both of you as you voiced out your drunken thoughts. it was stupid-so stupid. all this time, you had both been too caught up in the high created by all the praises and achievements. you were taught to eliminate any kind of obstacle that came your way whenever you set a goal, you forgot to look at each other as just...humans. sure, the pride that bloomed in your chest whenever you successfully cleared yet another mission felt good, but has that ever felt as good as taehyun's touch? his lips on yours, rough hands enveloping yours as a silent sign of care and reassurance, arms circling your waist to keep you close, to keep you safe. you never paid much attention to human relationships, and perhaps that was the reason why, once you stepped foot into your empty apartment, once the cheers died down, you had never felt truly satisfied with your life.

hearing the sound of light snores coming from beneath him, taehyun looked down to find you already fast asleep in his lap. “cute” he chuckled, secretly taking out his phone for a pic, the corners of his mouth turning up at the thought of teasing you about it tomorrow. he slowly detangled your hand that was holding on to his shirt tightly, then lifted you up to carry you over to your side of the bed. he frowned upon noticing that you never had the chance to take off your dress. diverting his eyes as much as he could, taehyun took it off for you, blushing as he slid one of his shirts over your head. he didn't want to invade your privacy, he just wished you could rest comfortably after experiencing such a draining day.

“sleep well, y/n” taehyun pressed a kiss against your temple before getting underneath the covers himself. he sighed in contentment as he brought himself closer to you, your soft rhythmic breaths and warm body putting his own at ease.

taglist: @huekalover3000

[tigorrrr]

𝗕𝗹𝗼𝗼𝗱 𝗧𝗶𝗲𝘀 || ʜᴜǒ ᴄʟᴀɴ

Banners made by, and AU belongs to @blood-bonded

"So, the fiends, what are their whereabouts?"

It was a simple question enough, though a tough one to answer when facing the brusque matriarch of clan Huǒ.

A new threat of Primordial-blood coven had procreated somewhere in Europe like a disease that it is. The ones in charge kept tabs on locus of the Boru from the shadows from the humanity's eye, howbeit difficult it had become.

The moment mister Rostov had sent a telegraph to the Shaolin Temple, the message was transmitted to Liu Kang and with haste he went to convey it to Yèmànzhào personally.

Dusk had already passed over the Kunlun mountains and it was easier for Liu Kang to move about the temple grounds and access the main temple tower, he ascented the stairs to the fifth floor with ease using his inhuman agility and speed.

The Dragonborn matriarch sat by one of the many wide, wooden, hengpi windows when interrupted from her tea time and reading.

She thundered her exigent inquiry once her senses alerted her of his approach and met the chatoyant orbs in the shadows of unlit places of her home, knowing the only reason he would come to her this urgently is because of the current and only trouble all covens and her clan talk about.

Liu Kang let the firepit's flames light up his silhouette, folding his arms behind his back. "They are nearing the China-Russia borders from West-South. Geras informed me we should expect them in China within two months time, my lady."

She sneered disdainfully and set down her tea cup. "Tsk... And the Lin-Kuei?"

"We last heard of them leading the Hunters to North, my lady..... And they have not yet returned." he admitted the latter with slight hesitation.

Yèmànzhào slowly stood and began to stalk about the circular room, close to the fire in the center, her lour never leaving from where her guest stood. "And what, pray tell, Liu Kang, do you propose? Surely, not to stand around and wait for the wild animals to infiltrate my temple and tear down the whole Chinese empire."

"My lady, I propose we send some of your best Dragonborn—"

"Absolutely not!"

Liu Kang tried to overpower her quick bawl as her mind narrowed to a tunnel vision when he offered his suggestion, his tone filled with urgency. "Lady Yèmànzhào—"

"You useless, blood-sucking, dead man!" she tensely took a step closer to him, as soon as she blurted out her disapproval, her squinted irises flashed an icy blue.

The vampire representative stilled, shutting his jaws shut until he felt pressure on his gums. He had grown accostumed to the Dragonborn mistress' disdain for his kin, over the many years by her side not once a day went without insulting the vampire kind, and her people had shared that hatred.

And, sometimes, the self-loathing is much stronger than ego for him to care.

She immediately calmed the rising anger, and also stopped the growth of herself before hard horns could sprout atop her crown, fangs could replace blunt teeth, and scales could rip off from beneath her flesh.

Routing to the balcony-like window instead of being anywhere closer to the vampire man, the tall and lanky woman hunched to look at the garden meters below them.

"I will not allow my people's blood to spill! Should my people go to war, the humans will involve themselves and we shall be hunted like those centuries ago — no, not again," Yèmànzhào inhaled deep the mountain air and nature into her sinuses before her tone could raise an octave.

A strong breeze whipped past their temple to the direction of eastern third of Europe. "The Queen has her vampires to spare, let her deal with the hound dogs, they are her creations after all."

The matriarch may not believe it, but he doesn't have any joy out of this at all. Confrontations is the least of his favorite but sometimes it wasn't an option, he had been given an order - unfortunately - to be it the first option to share should it be discussed, and he cannot disobey those above him.

Liu Kang swallowed a rock-hard lump in his throat. Sometimes, scarcely, he has an option to speak up but it's like a gamble, should he deal the right card his very head may stay atop his shoulders still, should he not...

Picking his words wisely, he approached the Dragonborn only two steps closer, close enough for both their comfort bubbles not to burst, and not to be dismissed from the matriarch's worth of attention. "I apologize if it may come off as discourteous, however, would it not be for the Arai, you and your kin would have been in the lowest underground pit until now... I believe it is your duty as their loyal allies to land a helping hand."

Rude it was indeed. The nerve of this man. How typical of him to say exactly what Yèmànzhào doesn't want to hear, but with those additional facts and reminders, how is she to argue with that?

Despite wanting to, she cannot turn her back on them.

She may be the new leader, as in securing a higher hierarchy post for the last century, but the fear instilled in their souls from generation after generation held much more meaning than a title that made it feel nearly frivolous.

The Huǒ matriarch grew tense and irked. She gripped at the railing and glanced at the crested ring, that figuratively is chained on her forefinger, the very sight of it pummeled her insides both with dread and hot fury.

Of course, the Dragonborn aren't without sin, approximately 4000 B.C. her kin had created havoc wherever they went until they had been forced to submit. Now they are nothing but legends and fairy tales, almost but not nearly forgotten.

Yèmànzhào's kin used to be a proud clan, and then vampirism spread like cancer around the world...

Perhaps Liu Kang keeps forgetting, that the reason the Dragonborn were damned in the pit is because of the very same 'people' that got them out of there.

From cattle, they had became the pets. She should feel envy for the Boru coven, really, for they are at least free; nonetheless, for how long, the New Order may take the prerogative back just the same.

Yèmànzhào heaved a sigh and growled through gritted teeth; "... Tell the General to gather his warriors and send him to aid our 'allies', since they cannot manage without our help... I wish to be rid of that vermin for good. Order them to kill any Boru in sight. Less vampires in the world, the better."

Liu Kang, for once, didn't take the last comment personally and bowed to the matriarch before marching off the temple to sent the Huǒ warriors to battle in the northern parts of Eurasia.

Who's Yèm, you ask? Dis her 👇🏼

[sunsoothed]

hair(care)

remember this post? yes i wrote the fic. with some angst and backstory as a treat! family bonding time and people learning to love. the ao3 summary is "Yohan first learns affection through money, then oil." which i think is really really funny.

word count: 1696

read on ao3

apologies for any errors, and enjoy!

-

The first time Yohan tries, it is before everything. He’s allowed to err here and there, require an entire braid to be unwound and redone. He’s allowed to experiment with the clips and the ribbons and decide when the act is complete and present his art to his niece and his family. Elijah is rightfully fawned over, cheeks bright and smiles brighter, holding onto her uncle and hiding her face in his shoulder with glee.

That was, of course, before everything.

-

If Yohan has touched a hair on Elijah’s head since, it is only to make a promise or only in her sleep.

The doctors will take care of you, don’t worry. Samcheon is here. I won’t let them hurt you any more than you already have been.

Midnight, in that agonising few months of hospital rooms and the claustrophobic rehabilitation centre. When Elijah is able to perceive nothing but her breath, Yohan, hands reverent; soothing his own fears through comforting his niece. Things will be okay. We’ll be fine. A few grounding breaths are never enough, not after he learns what those monsters took from his niece.

And when Elijah cries. When she first asks after her mother and father, why they aren’t by her side, why is it just samcheon everyday? When Yohan’s tears ring before hers, for the first and last time. I’m sorry, so is declared. I’ll fix this, so is promised. He holds her as close as he can permit himself to, and vows to burn down this world if she asks him to.

-

Elijah, once, four years since, on her tenth birthday, asks him, “Can you help me?”

Yohan will pretend like he hasn’t been starved of hearing those words. He follows her to her room, honoured of her trip halfway across the house.

“The girls at school,” Elijah fumbles about, wringing her hands together, “that… they wear their…”

He stands in her doorway, somewhat uninvited, waits for her to finish.

“They wear their hair, kind of… like this,” Elijah mimics some variation of a hairstyle best she can, two locks of her hair held in her hands, the parting off. “I was just…”

Yohan, unfortunately, understands little. “Do you need a haircut?”

Elijah’s hands fall, as does the thin hope upon her features. “It’s nothing,” she dismisses. “I only called you because ahjumma wasn’t in today. It’s fine.”

Yohan blinks. “I can help if —”

“It’s fine,” Elijah hisses. “I was mistaken.”

-

If there is any chance of that ever happening again, time will have to be reversed. Elijah turns twelve, and things change, and Yohan notes his laptop has been hacked.

He buys her a cake for her thirteenth birthday that finds itself smashed against a wall and a demand for no such recurrence.

Yohan will never disobey her. Not with things that she can control.

So he buys no cakes, but buys her a building and channels the affection he allows himself to feel once a month in an allowance that shocks Ms Ji despite the lifetime she’s spent in this family.

Once, there is a package of hair care products with their usual shipment of essentials, which Ms Ji makes a show of putting in Yohan’s way. When he relents, it only takes a tilt of head to the east of the house for her to get the hint. He never knows if Elijah uses them, but the list goes on to include some products out of the large batch he’d purchased, and Yohan considers buying another building.

-

On her sixteenth birthday, Yohan asks, “Do you want to have a birthday party?”

Elijah asks, “Who will we call?”

Yohan nods, for that is an apt answer.

-

When Kim Gaon comes, Elijah hates him more than usual. That, Yohan had expected. What he hadn’t was that this hatred would melt away faster than ice when met with fire.

The frist time Elijah sports a more delicate hairstyle than the usual ponytail, Yohan thinks it’s a trick of the light. But she turns her head when retrieving cereal, and her hair is still parted that way and a short braid runs from behind her ear into the clipped-back hair at the back of her head, and Yohan pauses to stare.

Instead of their noncommittal acknowledgement of each other each morning, he asks, “When did you…” and gestures to the back of his head.

Elijah shrugs, looking over at him impassively for a moment before pursuing her breakfast once again. Kim Gaon slides into view, grin perpetually etched into his face, asks, “Elijah, did it stay?”

To which Elijah smiles back, and now Yohan’s eyebrows remain shot up.

Kim Gaon continues to talk, “It’s experimental. We’ll try a different style tomorrow. Your hair’s long enough to make an intricate bun.”

Yohan ensures Elijah watches him conspicuously eye the both of them.

“Kim pansa,” he says, breaking the moment. “We need to go to work.”

-

The next day, and the day after that, Elijah wears her hair in different styles. Once it is a high bun with some small braids, once it is a different parting and a new set of clips. Yohan observes critically over breakfast as Elijah holds her head a certain way to ensure it doesn’t fall into her food, and thinks, how impractical.

She catches him looking, so she hoists a sour look, to which Yohan responds with an exaggerated tilt of his head, aiming to mimic her.

“Don’t make fun of her,” Kim Gaon’s imposing voice interrupts. “Elijah looks fantastic today.”

Elijah beams. Yohan is disarmed of a biting reply for he hasn’t seem her teeth take on anything but a stubborn baring of power in front of him. He spends the rest of the day replaying it.

-

When things so south and north again, when Elijah acknowledges, begrudgingly, that her uncle did not have it out for her father, Kim Gaon mediates harmoniously.

He spends an evening making them both chase the cat around the house.

It’s an inane idea, even Elijah hates it, but he tells them the reason Kkomi starts throwing things off their desks at four in the morning is because she’s understimulated, and that even a cat needs to exercise.

So it’s Elijah’s job to get her rilled up enough to run — in a cat’s terribly comic way — away from them, and Yohan’s to ensure she keeps running around.

He’s insane, is what Kim Gaon is. Elijah’s more than sure this borders on some ethical offense. Yohan sure seems to find some pleasure in making the cat scared for her life.

Gaon congratulates them both with a mid-evening coffee and snack break. Elijah actually, voluntarily, asks for Yohan to pass the plate of biscuits across, and thanks him — thanks him! — when he does.

Before they all retire to bed, after another shared meal, Elijah calls for him from down the hall.

“Yohan!”

He turns, maintaining what he thinks is a smile.

“Can you try and get some coconut oil?”

“What for?”

Elijah scrutinises him, gauging how he doesn’t understand something so obvious. “For my hair.”

Yohan nods, still not on the same page, but very much wanting to be. “I’ll get it,” he assures.

He doesn’t blink twice at the astronomical shipping price.

-

It’s a tall bottle, imported and primly packaged, that greets Elijah when she returns home from her weekly ice-cream run with Gaon.

She eyes it, suspicious, before their resident busybody stands in her doorway and says, “Oh, bujang-nim actually bought it for you.”

Elijah blinks at Gaon innocently. Yohan does listen to her sometimes.

“Material wealth,” Gaon seems to understand. “We’ll put it in your hair tomorrow, okay? Keep it in for a few hours.”

“A few hours?” Yohan voices, having just turned the corner, dressed as he usually is at home.

“What are you doing here,” Elijah mutters, shooting a scowl at Yohan as he stands in her doorway as well.

He scowls back, never one to back down from a challenge, as Gaon goes on about the benefits of oiling hair behind them.

-

“Don’t pull,” Elijah hisses.

“I’m not,” Yohan insists, but puts less force into his actions nonetheless.

Gaon and Ms Ji are monitoring them, mirroring each other with their arms crossed and leaning against opposite sides of the doorway.

Yohan sections Elijah’s hair into three parts after brushing through it, the fine-toothed comb surprisingly sparse of broken hair.

“Gaon has been helping me take care of it,” Elijah had explained, when he errantly asked. “What, did you think I’m some sort of wild animal?”

Yohan carefully collects some oil in his palms, completely foreign to this, eyes flickering up to Gaon for guidance. Gaon is absolutely no help.

So he trusts his instincts and starts at Elijah’s scalp, rubbing oil in, and ends with oil down his forearms and Elijah’s hair in a thick braid. She’s fast asleep.

“That means you did a good job,” Gaon whispers to him.

Yohan would smile, but such affection hardly suits his face. He pats Gaon’s face with an oily hand, leaves him spluttering, and grins to himself as he tries to wash the oil off.

-

It barely becomes a routine, because despite Gaon’s somewhat vast knowledge on hair care and what Elijah read online, washing oil out of your hair can be a nightmare. But Ms Ji and Gaon have observed their two sulking overlords interacting with an increasing frequency, even if it is sometimes just to disagree about an arrangement of clips or parting of hair.

Gaon had supposed, somewhat, that his bujang-nim had at least an understanding of style. In his discussions with his niece, though, when somehow colour schemes and draping becomes relevant, Gaon admits he’d underestimated Kang Yohan.

Later Elijah will decide she wants to dress for dinner as well, and Yohan will be the only one diligently obeying the formality. So much so that he will leave a guest in the company of the villainous home to attend to his niece’s requests. No one will ask about the pink bow in her hair, but it’s more than enough for Yohan to know that he tied it up.

[my-mt-heart]

If I can share, Carol and Ezekiel are sort of foil-ing Leah and Daryl's relationship. They shared a hug. Daryl and Leah don't. Ezekiel has a sickness that can be treated. Leah's kind of sickness can't be. Carol and Ezekiel represent a couple that didn't work out but they still remained friends and are still allowed to be in each other's lives. Daryl and Leah's relationship represents that couple that was not only too tumultuous to work, but one (Daryl) can't move on until the other (Leah) is totally removed from their life permanently. They can't even be friends. Carol and Ezekiel's relationship is destined for closure because they both have respected each other enough to move on, forgive, heal and improve themselves. Daryl and Leah's relationship is not destined for closure because the respect is not mutual, Leah is worse mentally than when we are first introduced to her, which means she can't move on from her pain and instead of bettering herself, she makes herself the center to protect herself from feeling the pain. Ezekiel still supports Carol in his way because he genuinely likes her and is a good guy. Leah supports Daryl to the extent it helps her and is in no way good.

So just put it together. Kang didn't make the decision to have those two former couples reuniting separately for no reason. She is showing you healthy relationship that didn't work out vs. Unhealthy relationship that didn't work out.

And THEN Caryl will reunite, their relationship rising anew from the fertilizing ashes of pain that produces not grief, but hope; not hatred, but love; not self-loathing, but an appreciation for who the other is.

This is a great way to look at it. Daryl and Carol both have to put their past behind them before they can truly be at peace and be happy together, though I do think they can at least begin the process of building their relationship back up while they're trying to work on themselves.

[shimmershae]

So.  Thanks to my new anonymous friend, this is going to become a thing.

Shae’s thinky thoughts about the latest episode--Acheron:  Part 2--beneath a cut. 

Because spoilers, however vague they might be.  

Let’s be real here.  This is more a stream of consciousness than anything else so if that’s not your thing, you are most welcome to nope right on out of this post.  Trust me.  I’ll completely understand, lol.  Sometimes?  I wish I could nope right on out of my own brain and the way it operates.  

That said?  Without further ado--

Episode 2′s opening, though.  Maggie trapped with hungry Walkers converging?  It totally gives me Glenn under the dumpster vibes.  I don’t know if that was intentional or just happy coincidence but way to link Maggie to her dearly departed better half, show.  

Is it just me or has Father G had more OOMPH to him these last few seasons?  Again, I have to ask--Rosita’s influence or no?  Regardless, I bet Seth Gilliam is loving the job these days.  

Side note:  am I gonna have to go to bed early every Saturday night from now until the end just so I that I might be able to SEE?  Something?  Anything?  My curtains are flimsy-ass.  I admit it.  But this is more frustrating than TXF.  Angela, WTF?  

No, seriously.  It’s like complete guess work who’s in these subway scenes.  Some of that has to do with them being overly populated by redshirts and the rest of it has to do with me having to squint and turn sideways to make out their facial features. 

Look at Daryl busting through concrete walls!  Should I call him the Kool-Aid Man considering NR has once again allowed himself to be led right into a biased, shipper trap?  Hmm.  I might.  

Imagine seeking refuge in those dark, filthy subways.  Any second now I expect to hear the skittering of rats.  Will Dog lose his effing mind a la Divergence?  He’s been shown to go off half-cocked that way, lol.  Oh well.  Guess it’ll be in character if he does.  

Impressive graffiti storyboards.  Does it mean something that it immediately cuts to the Commonwealth storm troopers afterward?  Maybe.  Who really knows at this point?  They been trying to gaslight us forever.  

LOL at Princess yet again.  Yumiko is just like da fuq is this person?  

No, really.  LMAO.  “That was her.  From last night.  Did you see how she was looking at us?”  

Then you have Eugene, hahaha.  “Oh God.  Why did he tell off the big guy?”  Like the man is totally me in this type of situation.  Not even gonna lie.  

“That’s right.  We want to talk to the manager.”  

I literally cannot wait ‘til Carol and Daryl meet Princess.  Can.  Not.  Wait.  

How sad is that note on that $100 bill?  Small moment but it totally gives me Season 4 vibes when they were on their way to Terminus seeking sanctuary.  

Hmm.  Remember how that place wasn’t what they thought it was?  I’m sure neither is the Commonwealth.  But I feel like what’s left of Team Family is totally going to do Rick proud, lol, and prove they’re messing with the wrong people if they try something.  

Daryl, Man.  You gonna have to get a better handle on your headstrong Fur Son.  I wonder if Dog would listen better to his mama?  Things to ponder.  

Sounds like Miko has this group’s number.  Or does she?  

Princess and Eugene totally look like they’re waiting their turn for the Principal’s office, LOL.  

“Stop moving!  You’re taking my nerves over the edge to a proverbial 11 on a scale of 10.”  I feel you, Eugene.  I do.  Also you, Princess.  Two of the most relatable TWD characters right there, I’m telling you.  

Princess is me when I really, really, really have to pee.  TMI?  Sorry, lovelies.  LOL.  I just...she’s so relatable.  

LMAO.  “If that fine ass dude in the orange suit...”  Princess and Mercer incoming in 3-2-----

Princess’s excitement over the toilet paper=PRICELESS.  

Eugene, Man.  You desperately need to develop a poker face.  

There’s Daryl getting another cool camera shot.  Angela?  You playing favorites again?  

Carol’s claustrophobia could have never.  I bet that’s in the back of Pookie’s mind.  You can’t tell me it’s not because Carol lives in there rent-free.  

Ohhh.  Back to the subway car.  Looks like we got the Maggie redshirts leading the way.  First sacrificial “lambs”?  

Maggie pistol-whipping Negan was kinda deserved, but he wasn’t all wrong so.  

Damn.  I’m no Gage fan.  He can fuck all the way off for what he did to my baby Lydia.  But Maggie over there with ice in her veins.  

Yep.  I think the dude just got one of the most gruesome deaths in a while.  Yuck.  

I think Alden’s faith in Maggie definitely took several hits.  I feel like he kind of had her on some sort of pedestal dating back to Hilltop times.  Father G, though?  The man is continuing to show himself a SAVAGE MFer.  

Josh gives Eugene such believable tics and mannerisms.  He IS Eugene.  

Thank you, Maggie, for lighting that flare.  I could not see a damn thing.  

What are these bad memories Negan alludes to?  Hmm?  Him being a shit husband to Lucille back when he was still taking her for granted?  

Father G on Gage’s Walker--”All that is, is a shell of a man, who died a coward.”  Kind of ironic considering Father G’s own origins, huh?  Has he any warmth in there for anybody but Rosita and Coco?  Does he equate it with weakness?  

“There are worse ways.”  And Maggie proceeds to paint us a horror story with mere words.  

Dark Maggie really surpasses anything certain fans have ever accused Carol of being.  Is she too far gone?  Who the hell knows?  I think it’s clear that she and Carol are both on a sliding scale of sorts when it comes to being able to compartmentalize shit to survive.  Personally?  I feel like Maggie might have leap-frogged Carol in this episode but it matters none because of the double standards so deeply entrenched in this fandom.  Both women have endured and had to do some horrific things.  It’s not a contest.  But it’s probably going to be turned into a season-long one.  

It’s almost like Kang was like, “Ya’ll bitches think Carol’s dark?  I’ll show you DARK.  Check and mate.”  

Whatever the reasoning, Maggie just got exponentially more interesting to me if not likable.  And before anybody out there comes at me, it’s entirely possible to be on a character’s side in some things and not be all up their ass in love with them, lol.  Like I’m attached to her because she’s family and Glenn loved her.  There’s a loyalty there and she absolutely is justified in her hatred of Negan.  But I’m not going to pretend her shit don’t stink like everybody else’s.  

Speaking of my baby Glenn.  What would he think of this version of Maggie?  I think he would be gutted and heart stricken that events led to her being like this but he’d understand because he’s pure like that.  Don’t mean he’d be A-OK with it all.  

Dog must be protected at all costs.  

Confession.  I know not the fuck who Pony Boy is, but I know him because all my fandom friends have pointed him out to me, lol.  RIP, Man.  I think you’re number’s up or close to it.  

Okay, though.  I admit it.  I am kinda LOVING Badass Father G.  

That scene in the subway car with all of them working to take all the Walkers out was already badass.  Then Daryl arrived and made it, in @freefromthecocoon’s words, HAWT.  LOL.  

Eugene staring at that little black book like it contains torture tools, hehehe.  

“Processed?  As in administratively?  Processed as in bologna or other meat stuffs?  This inquiring (enquiring?) mind needs to know.”  OMG, Eugene.  I admit it.  Even if it makes me look like a lunatic, LOL.  I straight up LMAO at that one.  I mean, ten years later and Terminus still fresh on the man’s mind.  

“You like feeling nervous?”  Well, no.  None of us that do, Mercer?  Do.  

Then he proceeds to make me howl with his “You can’t lie for shit” to Eugene.  

Josh McDermitt?  I love you, Man.  40 year old virgin, LOL.  

All this talk over the seasons of Daryl’s virginity and we have Eugene, hahaha.  But was he telling the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth?  

Finally.  Some daylight.  Where I can see.  

Eugene’s relief at seeing his friends safe and sound was such a beautiful thing to see.  I loved those hugs.  

Mercer’s face when he snarled “beat cop” in disdain to Ezekiel.  I think I’m gonna love this dude.  

“I went to West Point.  Asshole.”  Yeah.  I am.  

I know they probably catfishing Eugene right here because spoilers tell us that ain’t Stephanie.  But my heart still did a little d’aww.  Angela.  Don’t play with his poor heart like that.  

What’s got Daryl so pensive, huh?  Is it that the note reminds him of kids being lost or taken from their family? Or separated from their family?  Is he thinking of those Grimes babies and wondering if Michonne will ever make it back and why and how she was able to leave them behind?  Tell me it ain’t that Find Me nonsense.  

“This place sure has gone to shit since the last time I was here.”  LMAO, JDM.  I mean Negan.  Sorry.  Sorry.  I still hate Negan, but JDM has me entertained at least since they gave the asshole some shades of gray.  And speaking of shades of gray.  I’m loving the gray beard.  JDM’s looking GOOD (hear that NR?  Embrace the gray).  Negan can still kick rocks, lol.  

Anyway.  That scene was CREEPY AF.  Not even gonna lie.  

The Reapers strutting right on up to our group like it’s The Purge:  ZA.  

My bad, Pony Boy. Now RIP.  

Dark, dark episode with loads of tension broken up by some welcome humor by Princess.  The girl is fast becoming a fave of mine.  

My baby’s back next week!!!

I’m just going to plug my ears and pretend they’re trying to capture/recapture the horses because they’re pets.  Not because they’re starving so bad they feel the need to eat them.  La la la la la.  I can’t hear you.  

[ikkleosu]

I’m going all in - I love you and kisses, and here’s why

But this is my caveat: These are my speculations only. Do not come to me saying I ruined your mental health if this turns out not to be accurate. Yes, I’d have a good hit rate this season but I’ve also made horrific wrong guesses so take this all in the speculative fashion it is intended.

OKay, so a lot of people want to know what my thoughts are on if canon is going to happen, when, what’s going to happen in ep 14 etc. And it’s a complicated story, but the first thing I have to say is - the first step I start from is trusting Angela Kang.

I know, right? But this is the way I see it. Kang has taken the shit heap that Gimple left her and is trying to mould it into something that she wants, and more importantly that she thinks the audience wants.

This is backed up by the comments made by the new AMC boss saying they did lots of research into why the audience dropped, and what the audience wants. THAT for me is the MOST IMPORTANT key in why I think Caryl canon is happening. The show has so little left going for it with the loss of Rick and Michonne, and what Gimple did to the writing, and the way TV is and its age etc. They NEED to not piss the core, loyal audience off further. Not doing Caryl is doing that. Caryl is the most popular ship, that’s a simple fact. So yes, Caryl is happening and I think it’s happening now.

And all the things I thought at the start of the season still stand, in terms of the comments by AK and Norman. So yup, Caryl’s still happening.

SO, that said, HOW do I think it’s happening. Well I think 2 bits of the comic are key...

First, let’s talk “I love you”

To me it’s been set up all this season that Carol will eventually talk to Daryl, open up about everything and let him in emotionally. And then we get the information that episode 14 is called Just Look at the Flowers. So yup, I think that’s when it’s going to happen.

We know that it’s Daryl she’s going to open up to (not Lydia or Zeke) because we have Daryl saying “I’m the one you tell”, and saying he’s begging her to talk to him. 

Just Look at the Flowers tells us she’s going to talk about Lizzie - the root of her self-hatred and pain. Something she’s never talked about since Tyrese swore her to secrecy.  

This is foreshadowed this week as well with Glenn’s grave. Daryl feels responsible for Glenn’s death. He knows how Carol feels and is contemplating it. So it will come up as a topic, which it would when Carol blames herself for both Connie’s death and Lizzie’s.

She’s going to lay out to Daryl why she hates herself.

That is foreshadowed by the dialogue in this week’s episode. Lydia says “you hate yourself”, seeing right through her. And even more significantly, Carol asks Daryl if he hates her and he says “I could/would never hate you”. (Note this phrase as I’m coming back to it in a minute!)

I believe Kang is going to use the Rule of 3 with Carol’s self-hatred. It’s been brought up twice, the third time it’s brought up it’s resolved. i.e. the next time Carol says she hates herself, or that Daryl hates her, it’s going to be “fixed” because Daryl is going to tell her he doesn’t hate her, he loves her.

(I also think this scene may also resolve the Rule of 3 over Daryl liking Connie. Carol twice has said he likes Connie. If she brings it up again, he’ll correct her and resolve it)

Now, it may seem like I’m jumping the gun in thinking he’ll say he loves her. I mean, he can forgive her and show he wouldn’t judge her without saying that? 

Well, firstly, we have the most basic obvious answer this week - he would never hate her. So that rules that out. As I said before, you don’t have the same conversation with the same outcome. So it has to take it to another level.

And then there’s this from the comics:

TO explain, this is Carl - who had The Grove equivalent story in the comics - explaining to Lydia about when he told Andrea that he killed Ben (Lizzie).

Carl goes on to explain that when Andrea said I love you, he remembered his dad saying your parents love you no matter what, so this was the moment he started calling Andrea Mom.

Now this may seem a tenuous link here but let me explain. This scene DOES happen at the point in the comics we are at in s10, just after A Certain Doom, when Andrea dies. And yes I realise I’m bringing up the dreaded ghoul of a parent child relationship, BUT it is reversed here, with Daryl being mom. LOL

Because I think Kang is using this scene as basis for Caryl - Carol showing Daryl the absolute worst thing she’s ever done, and Daryl proving what he said this week, he could never hate her, in fact he loves her. Just like Andrea told Carl she loved him, and showed her love is unconditional. So this story is going to lead to Carol knowing Daryl loves her unconditionally. 

But what about kissing?

Let’s for argument sake say well, i love you doesn’t have to be romantic love. And true, it doesn’t. Except for all the clues in the first half of the season (Carol’s dream, the ships on the bedding, Daryl taking her a flower etc). And also there’s this...

Now those of you who have been with me for a long time know this story, because I have been saying this for 4 - COUNT ‘EM, 4!!! - years! And by the law of averages, FFS, i must be right eventually.

Here’s the original post I made about it, in case anyone cares:

https://ikkleosu.tumblr.com/post/140064036369/lets-hop-on-the-delusional-train

This is me harping on again about the comic scene where Rick and Andrea get together. 

Now, for whatever reason they chose not to use that storyline with Rick and Michonne. It comes from the Negan era, so yes it’s essentially past that point, but there may be a reason they kept hold of it.

And it does fit Carol’s story MUCH better than Rick’s... and it seems very likely Daryl and Carol are going to get some of RIck and Andrea’s comic stories...

So, what if this is part of the scene in Just Look at the Flowers?

Swap the genders, Rick is Carol. As we know, Carol is in this place now.

It’s believeable to imagine that after Alpha is killed by Negan, Carol feels lost. without that revenge, what has she got left? She’s empty and dead and doesn’t know how to go back to just living a life (as she mentions in this week’s episode). 

Remember in the MSF Daryl says “It’s like talking to a ghost!” Possibly foreshadowing this conversation, and Daryl saying to Carol “Isn’t it time you came back to life?” before the smoochy happens!

Look, as I say, I could be wildly wrong on all of this but I am sure this is all leading someplace.

People have pointed out this is going round in a circle, more Carol torture, Carol’s arc begin rehashed. And they are right. It is, but I think it’s deliberate.

I think Kang is retelling Carol’s arc but giving it the ending either she always intended or AMC intended or something. But I believe she’s retelling it with the purpose of giving it the ending it deserves - resolution with Caryl, ending Carol’s misery.

@onedayyoujustchange​ summed it up:

Connie/Magna in the cave - Karen and David at the prison

Connie - Beth

Henry - Sophia/Lizzie/Mika

Zeke - Tobin

Left at the cave - banished by Rick.

It’s all coming round but this time Carol is going to be allowed to feel and forgive herself and move forward instead of papering over the cracks.

[toomanyf4ndoms7]

Hey do remember this post where I said I would do something on the revenants?

No time like months later.

Since only four revenants actually got dialogue and personalities to compare in mkx we’ll be going through them.

Let’s begin with mkx.

Sindel: mkx sindel is rather affable as a revenant though still on Quan chi’s side. She welcomes Jax back to the Netherrealm which could be sarcastic but the most important thing is what she says after:

“Quan chi reunited me with my family.”

This comes up later when Cassie questions her on killing Kitana: “we are bonded in death, you will join us.”

Mkx sindel sees her resurrection as a gift rather than corruption, how much of that was Quan Chi’s brainwashing is unknown but she was genuine in being overjoyed at reuniting with Kitana.

Kitana: After her mother, it seems fitting to move down the family tree to the daughter.

Kitana enjoys being a revenant as it allows her to cause suffering instead of being the victim. She is also dismissive of Sareena saying that emotion corrupted her.

Despite that she still loves Liu Kang as the two rule the netherrealm at the end.

Kung Lao: Kung Lao has something interesting in his Koncept art, a mask that he wears to hide his shame, which says so much. He is also less agressive and gives Jax a chance to get out of fighting him.

He has a dialogue with Sub zero about how Bi han apparently “calls to you from the other side.” This is probably just a thinly veiled threat though.

He blames Raiden for his death at Shao Kahn’s hands saying that he let it happen.

Liu kang: The main man himself. He is probably the one who has the most hatred towards Raiden. He believes Raiden stole everything from him and that Jax doesn’t deserve to rejoin the team.

Raiden’s chapter is the most telling (this chapter was depressing.) with Liu Kang fighting his former mentor and taunting him about his former visions. He pauses for a short moment after Raiden says that his mistakes haunt him to this day.

Intro dialogue makes clear that he is spiteful after his demise which he release to his former allies and even Cassie Cage, calling her a “Pathetic child of idiot parents.” He calls Raiden “Earthrealm’s greatest enemy” and when questioned about whether or not the fight should proceed he replied “Most definitely.”

The tying point between these four is that while they all seek Revenge and serve Shinnok, they all have different views on their situation ranging from despising it, to enjoying the freedom it gives, to bring overjoyed at reuniting with family, they were unique.

Let’s move onto Mk11.

Mk11 Sindel: Revenant Sindel was only around for one chapter in aftermath but she seems notably more spiteful, not even mentioning Kitana, and devoted To Shinnok. Not too much to say here.

Kitana: Kitana barely appears in the story and has a line which is confusing in context: when Liu Kang asks her to stand down to avoid harm, she scoffs and replies: “Harm me? You’ve already KILLED me! My fate was sealed the moment i joined you at Raiden’s side.”

This is confusing because she and Liu kang were ruling the netherrealm at the beginning of the game and with the few scenes they were together in, they seemed to love each other and there was no indication of resentment.

However there is one image that perfectly encapsulates Kitana in the story:

you have Kitana and Shao Kahn in the same room, working for the same person, and there is no indication of the sheer unpleasantness of the partnership. even if its a whole “we have bigger things to deal with” there should still be a scene like Kitana and Liu Kang talk to Kronika but Shao Kahn walks in and you just see the twos eyes narrow. i don’t know just keep some personality.

Kung Lao: Kung Lao has lost the implication of shame and self loathing and is mainly just filled with envy towards Liu kang which he releases on him when he becomes a fire god. Kung Lao doesn’t interact with Raiden in this story but an interesting tidbit is that if you choose Kung Lao to fight against his revenant self, Liu kang just goes right in fists flying, while Kung Lao is more hesitant.

Liu Kang: he despises Raiden and that’s basically his character in this, but the thing is for some reason it feels less personal. While mkx Revenant Liu kang was smug in some ways he was also spiteful and aggressive, here he seems a bit too cliche evil. As opposed to last game where he hated Raiden for causing his death and “taking everything away.” Here he says “I could have defeated Shao Kahn. But Raiden wanted the glory.”

My point is that mkx revenants have more personality which is ironic because with Quan chi and Shinnok out of commission, they should have more agency but they mainly just follow kronika.

Enjoy I guess.

[docholligay]

Doc Loves Garbage: Mortal Kombat

I know what you’re going to say, “Oh Doc! Everyone loves Mortal Kombat!” no, no I don’t love it in the way I love to watch Flash Gordon or Street Fighter or anything like that, i mean I love it in an UNIRONIC way. I am convinced the movies has themes and is doing things. It has a small plot of land and I will dig deep and plant everything I think it’s saying about vengeance and motivation and hatred and serve it back to you, telling you that Mortal Kombat is a good movie with a legitimate point of view that is not all ham-fisted. 

It does not and is not. I have been running a con job on myself for 25 years. (Yes Mortal Kombat literally came out 25 years ago, you must sit and live with that) 

I need you to know that it Raiden’s first appearance, he literally appears behind a fucking gauze curtain and thunder rolls in the background. I also need you to know that this continues THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE MOVIE. I have never counted how many times a thunderclap rumbles in the background as Raiden says something, but it is MANY. 

THE SUBTLETY NO WONDER I LOVE THIS MOVIE. 

And when we get raiden it’s literally this: 

I need us all to bask in Christopher Lambert, going full Christopher Lambert because I guess his voice just sounds like that, in a wig that makes him look like someone’s Nana out for lunch with the girls, as our Lord Raiden. Just so we’re all on the same page here, this is Raiden from the original game:

I want you to note the utter lack of Nana wig. Whose idea was this? Who was sitting around trying to adpat a fighting game and thought, “You know the Lightning God is great and all but I wonder why he doesn’t have tumbling shoulder length grey hair.” 

And we have the not at all cliche as fuck conversation about Liu Kang’s return:

OH WOW THE DEPTH. THE PATHOS. I WONDER IF LIU IS GOING TO LEARN A LESSON ABOUT VENGEANCE. 

And yes, that is how Raiden reveals himself. Banner. Stunning. He literally just bows his head until the exact most dramatic point in the sentence to raise it. (You know, mild praise, it was 1995 and they actually cast an asian dude to play Liu Kang) 

I SURE AM GLAD WE ARE SITTING IN THIS VERY PARTICULAR HIDING PLACE WHILE SHANG TSUNG DROPS EXTREMELY POINTED EXPOSITION IN CASE ANYONE WAS LOST IN THE RICH TAPESTRY OF “CHARACTERS FIGHTING EACH OTHER FOR EXTREMELY MANUFACTURED REASONS” 

The entire movies storyline could be summarized in three cut scenes. I’ve seen more complex storylines actually come out of later Mortal Kombat games. The movie takes you by the hand from scene to scene as Characters explain their extremely complicated motivation to you over and over again.

(Okay I guess I lost my license to clip studio this would have been more fun with captions BUT) 

MY BROTHER IS DEAD

MY PARTNER IS DEAD

MY CAREER IS DEAD. 

Don’t worry: You won’t be allowed to forget this. You could be drunk for the entirety of the movie and answer a quiz on this later. It could be a pop up video where every time they appear on screen you are reminded that Liu Kang’s brother is dead. 

This is not an awkward cap, this is Kitana (10,000 years old, rightful heir to the Outworld throne, looks 22 and wears a leather corset as all heirs do) TELEKINETICALLY giving Liu Kang a fucking riddle while he’s in the middle of fucking fighting Sub-Zero. Not “Throw the bucket of water at him” but “figure out this puzzle game while a man tries to freeze you with his magical Paint orb”.” Why can Kitana do this? No one knows, anymore than anyone knows why we have to scream every character’s motivations when they come onscreen but somehow “Use the fucking bucket” is too simple for a woman whose literal only hope is overthrowing Shang Tsung. Did you not want to do business with the earth if they can’t figure out a riddle mid-battle? This is probably what happened to the moon. 

Because this is a movies in the 90s, the previously established tough girl has to great dragged away by her hair screaming. She’s a literal fucking special ops agent being held back by an elderly with a grip on her hair and she screams hysterically, because it’s the 90s! And she needs to be saved and brought to heel:

And then of course the boys have to go save her:

I don’t know why this element of contract law wasn’t brought up earlier, but I further appreciate the movie deciding to look directly into the camera and tell us the technicality that is going to save the day/ensure that the final battle is between Main Character and Villain, so we can have the Emotional Climax Where Liu Kang Learns a Lesson

He literally, mid-fight, meets up the spectre of his dead brother and without even hesitating somehow gets to the point of “it actually was not my fault” and I am not sure how fighting a bunch of dudes in combat has clarified this for you when it seemed to be a particular pain point earlier in the movie, because we really don’t go into all the emotions of it, also Raiden sort of quasi-implicated you in the beginning? But I’m glad you came to an easily quotable conclusion. 

Then we enter the moment where the game forgets its own rules, as Liu Kang gets hit A LOT A LOT in this final battle, but the writers decided that there was literally no other way to end a video game fight, because are we even really making a movie or had cut scenes just not been invented yet?

WE REMAIN VICTORIOUS FOR LITERALLY AND ACTUALLY TWO MINUTES BEFORE THE LEADIN TO A SEQUEL I SHIT YOU NOT. TWO MINUTES OF CINEMA DEVOTED TO SOMETHING GETTING RESOLVED. 

This movie is badly written, hammy, awful, and I GENUINELY love it. 

[superleeleehipster]

Why do I ship Caryl?

So this wasn’t something I was planning to write, but after seeing this question come up time and time again, I finally decided to entertain it and meditate over it. Because honestly, this question is more relevant now more than ever:

Why do I ship Caryl?

This person’s comment that I saw on another post asked what I think is a genuine question nowadays, and that is “why does Caryl need to be in love? Everyone knows they have a special bond and they would kill for each other. Why does it need to be romantic?” They weren’t hateful, or spiteful, or saying that this other ship makes more sense. They were just curious. 

It’s an even more relevant question now because of Melissa’s recent interview and what she said about Carzekiel and Caryl. She basically stated that Caryl is more important than romance, and they are arguably the person they’re closest with, but it is what it is. And she went on to point out that it’s been proven that she and Ezekiel are happy, and Daryl is happy for her. 

Side note: I’m not bothered by what she said about the two b/c I can understand her point of view. She’s tired of being asked the same damn Caryl question over and over again, it’s been going on since season 2 and only vamped up at the start of season 5. She knows about the shipping wars, she knows fans can get riled up over her’s and Norman’s responses over this question, and she’s tired of answering it b/c there’s nothing left to answer (and I’m sure she’s tired of the hate that happens within the fandom, as well as what’s directed at her and norman). Plus, as an actor, I’m sure it bothers her that some people are disregarding/diminishing the Carzekiel bond b/c she’s put her heart into that role. She can’t control the writing, and her job is to follow the script and play her part, which she has, and I’m sure she is proud of what she’s done this filming season. So I’m sure it hurts her to know that ppl are writing off Carzekiel as more of a one sided relationship b/c that’s her hard work. She wants ppl to support her work, no matter how shitty it is, and I get that. 

So the question remains, why do I ship Caryl?

I decided to really think on this question and give it a meaningful answer instead of what I usually talk about. So pushing aside all the superficial reasons or reasons that are just on the surface, why do I want them to be together? For one thing, it’s only natural for us humans to categorize things into groups. We do it all the time, even if we’re not thinking about it. Like for me, I put all the shirts and pants and sports bras I use for working out in one drawer, while I’ll put my pajama pants and shirts in a separate drawer. Then I’ll put my underwear, normal bras, and socks in another, etc. We also categorize people, so clicks for example, or how I work in this department while these people work in this department. It’s just human nature to categorize things. Personally, I think that is also the driving reason as to why people start to ship characters on shows, or at the very least debate if “these two will get together” because we like to put things into groups. Now I do understand that there are people who don’t ship at all, and that’s fine. In fact, that commenter was probably one of those people who didn’t understand shipping, and that’s okay. They’re just there for the story and entertainment. 

But aside from the natural urge to think “will they/won’t they”, for me I officially began my shipping in season 3 after Carol flirted with Daryl on the bus, though I know many folks began during season 2, and rightfully so. To me, I think part of it was the natural chemistry between Daryl and Carol. It was one of those magical moments you only see once in a blue moon, when not even the writers expected it, but it came to light because of two great actors who caught each other’s wavelength immediately. That kind of chemistry you couldn’t help but want romance to happen because you know it would be explosive, a rarity when it comes to shows nowadays because things have become so predictable. And most actors/tv couples don’t have the amount of chemistry that Melissa and Norman do. The only other characters I can think of who have that chemistry is Jaime and Claire from Outlander, and Mulder and Scully from The X Files... so there's really not that many couples with that kind of electricity between them on tv.

I also wanted Caryl to happen because, to me, it’s the ultimate romantic trope. You have two people who had been abused and beaten for most of their lives, only to find someone who genuinely understands that because it happened to them too. They leaned on each other, whether purposefully or not, and were able to positively influence one another to become better, more confident people. And it was amazing, especially looking at Daryl’s evolution, to see these two people open up and allow themselves to receive comfort, understanding, and love from someone else. Daryl did not like being touched, it was obvious in season 2 when he flinched away from Carol. Now, he on the regular puts an arm around her, and is more than happy to receive her hugs as well as reciprocate them. To me, that’s incredibly beautiful to see two people with similar backgrounds come together like that. And I think it would be the ultimate ‘fuck you’ to everyone who had hurt them to have them fall in love and be happy with each other. 

Why is it not enough for them to have a special bond? Because being in love is the closest you can be to someone. It’s something that I think they both deserve to have, and I think it would be extremely powerful if it were Carol and Daryl because they already have such an amazing bond to begin with. Having them become romantic would almost feel like a completion of their bond. It would be like Vegeta and Goku fusing together to become Vegeto, like the ultimate power (geek moment, sorry). Daryl has likely never been “in love” with someone before given his background, so it would be especially beautiful to see it happen for him, and to me, the only person I think he’d trust enough to open himself up for is Carol.

Having said all that, obviously that’s not where the writing is going in the show, which is very disappointing. I have no issues with Zeke, or Khary for that matter. It’s just disappointing that they had Carol get together with someone she hardly knew when she’s known Daryl since the beginning of the Turn. It’s true that there’s a possibility that Caryl is endgame, and it wouldn’t happen till the very end of the series. And maybe they’re those types of couples who really didn’t know they wanted to be together until it just clicks one day (I know two friends like that, where everyone thought they would be together eventually because they were such good friends. But it wasn’t until it just randomly clicked for them one day that they decided to give it a chance. She described it as them hanging out at her house and a lightbulb kind of went off and she just said ‘huh, I really like this guy’, and he wound up having the same thoughts... they’re still together :D). 

But for the people who are genuinely curious as to why we ship it and why we’re so disappointed... more than anything, it’s because of a few factors: 

1) Our passion for our ship has only grown b/c of the hatred we’ve gotten, and how often we’ve had to defend it. The more often we’ve defended it, the more emotional we become for our ship because we want to protect it. Those emotions we feel any time we have been attacked, or anytime we were disappointed sticks with you, and creates more and more stress for your fandom.

2) We have been trolled hard up until this filming season, and it feels like a slap in the face. Season 5 was amazing for Caryl the most part, but there were problems with the writing for Carol especially after that, and we didn’t have much Caryl screen time since. But the times we did, they were amazing scenes, and they were also the scenes that AMC would give sneak peaks with b/c they know they bring in viewers. That whole situation with Daryl finding Carol in the house was completely useless to the storyline, yet they put the money and the effort to create it. Carol even said that “she couldn’t lose him”, and Daryl made that selfless decision to not tell her about Glenn and Abraham. Then there was last year where amc’s first promotion photo was Caryl, and they published multiple pics of them two after. They had that photoshoot of the longest running cast members and it felt like a freaking prom shoot, with all of them posing together, one of which had the “couples” together. They even published a valentine’s day card with Daryl and Carol on it with a caption that says “true love”. Lennie James had even said that he didn’t think Morgan would have any relationship with Carol, not if Daryl had anything to say about it. Other shows have referenced Caryl before...

Long story short, we did not imagine this. We didn’t see something that wasn’t there. Even now, with AMC using Mcreedus to promote the new season, it just comes to show that they know Caryl brings in viewers. So to have Carzekiel happen is truly painful because they have dangled a piece of meat in front of us for years, only to give it to another ship. And maybe we have it wrong when it comes to Angela Kang. Maybe she didn’t write this and is actually doing us a favor by leaving no room to imagine that anything is going on with Caryl right now b/c she knows that we’ve been trolled a lot. Maybe she’s actually stopping the whole teasing thing, and if that’s the case then I do respect that. I’m not saying that is what’s going on but that’s always a possibility. But it’s really painful for us because we were teased, and we’re still ‘being used’ to this day for promotional reasons yet they’re doing the exact opposite. 

It’s like when you’ve fallen in love with someone but they wound up saying they don’t feel the same, but at the end they go “but don’t worry, we can still be friends”... BITCH WHY WOULD I WANT TO BE FRIENDS WHEN I OBVIOUSLY WANTED SOMETHING MORE WITH YOU??!!

... I promise I’m calm.

I actually have a friend who’s a Bethyl shipper, and obviously we don’t see eye to eye with some things but we never talk about it with each other (it’s like politics and family). So when I found out about Carzekiel, I confided in her about it and she related with me. She said they teased Bethyl a bit in season 4, and they technically did. With the hand holding, Daryl carrying Beth around the house they stayed in, and even saying that he’s hopeful now because of her. As a caryl shipper, of course I would’ve argued that was more of a father/daughter bond, but now I can see it from her perspective, and how she felt when Beth died. I might not agree with her ship at all, but she understands what it is like to be trolled by amc only to have her heart ripped out, and she was a nice enough friend to not call me out and actually sympathized with me. And I’m grateful for that because she’s helped me more than she knows to cope with this mess.

Anyways, to put a huge explanation into a small summary: I began shipping Caryl (and I still do) because to me they are an amazing duo with intense chemistry, and they seem to be in perfect sync with each other. Soulmates is the perfect adjective to use to describe them because they just get each other, and they’re so close, it’s amazing to watch it on screen. They’re two puzzle pieces that fit perfectly with each other. Having them become romantic would just be an amazing experience to watch, to see two abused people come together like that and discover what it’s like to be deeply in love with someone. Maybe I have romanticized it when I shouldn’t have, but to have two people so close like that, it’s only natural for me to want them to be together romantically because I know they’d be very happy together. 

Am I wrong to be so human?

Anyways, I’d like to hear from other caryl shippers as well. What made you decide to start shipping them. No debates, no hatred for other ships, just a gentle discussion of why we chose this fandom, and how much we loved (and still do) our ship.

[idolizerp]

[ LOADING INFORMATION ON HONEY’S MAIN VOCAL GYURI…. ]

DETAILS

CURRENT AGE: 23 DEBUT AGE: 19 TRAINEE SINCE AGE: 13 SKILL POINTS: 11 PERFORMANCE | 17 VOCAL | 08 DANCE | 00 RAP SECONDARY SKILLS: Imitations

INTERVIEW

msg think they’ve struck gold when they see her. it certainly helps that she provides an almost perfect base to work with: an impressive voice, decent visuals, decent everything else (”don’t worry,” they tell her, “we can fix that.”). if anything, she’s the ideal candidate to conform to the standards they plan to thrust upon her. especially when she’s just so willing to comply. kang gyuri is presented as bright smiles, shy laughter, and clever quips; embodying msg’s demands to a t, and in turn, living up to honey’s saccharine sweet name. which prompts management to kick it up a notch and add the ‘protective unnie’ to the mix: the mother-like figure who’s constantly watching over the other members and tending to their needs. 

ever kind, ever caring. ever fake.

still, popularity doesn’t immediately come for her. she wonders whether it’s to do with the fact her visuals aren’t extraordinary. maybe her aegyo doesn’t come across as naturally as the others do, and with the fascination for high pitched squeals and pouts, she’s at a loss. but it’s her voice, that voice, which elevates her into the spotlight, ensures she isn’t bombarded with the same harsh words directed to others. some of the time, at least.

although there are certain things she can’t escape. such as the criticism over her unstable vocals (see: their debut stage), the comments suggesting that her glare was directed at a fellow member (see: the trending forum post in may). netizens deem her personality to be rather sly, completely going against what the group is meant to represent. nothing sweet about a girl with rumoured hidden intentions. talented? yes. pretty? sure. genuine? well—

shame, then, that she isn’t eager to go anywhere. the hatred and rumours aren’t enough to usher her towards the exit and on the next flight to seogwipo. in fact, she vows to stick around, firmly fixed on attaining her dream to become a multi talented soloist. 

take it or leave it, she couldn’t care less.

BIOGRAPHY

the most common assumption shared by friends is surely, it must get lonely when her family consists of merely two members: dad and her. no other siblings to help out on the tangerine farm in seogwipo. no motherly figure to dote on him and her when days get tough. as if an additional member is somehow a necessity, to complete their happy little family portrait. to make everything better than it supposedly is.

fun fact: it’s fine the way it is now.

“don’t you think you need something else?” “what’s that?” “a thing, a pers—“ “can you get to the point?” “a mom.” “no.”

she isn’t afraid of calling out anyone attempting to question the notably absent motherly role. an arched brow and scoff greets strangers daring to inquire on the identity of this mystery woman. as far as she’s concerned, it shouldn’t matter who she may be when her dad’s managed to fulfil the role just fine. going above and beyond to ensure she’s happy, healthy.

he’s enough.  her dad’s enough. 

/

“don’t you know who this is?”

by this, she means the likes of uhm junghwa and Fin.K.L. 
by this, she means the various trot cds scattered on her bedroom floor. by this, she means the songs that virtually everybody should know

her dad encourages her love for music by contributing to her extensive collection. no matter the artist, the year, the genre; each cd and tape is happily accepted and carefully tucked away into a tattered cardboard box for future listening. silence is frowned upon when there’s more than enough at her fingertips to drown it out, once and for all.

it begins first with trot, followed by ballads before quickly moving to pop, eventually becoming a mix between the three. songs are created by combining small aspects of each, taking the parts she likes and discarding the rest. it helps with the boredom. when she’s confined to a classroom with nothing to do, stuck in the car on a long drive with nothing to listen to. when her procrastination is at a sky high.

such creations are typically kept under wraps. namely since friends struggle to identify the inspirations behind each tune and she figures it’s better to keep them away. to save her the disappointment, them the confusion. that is, before a classmate requests a song out of plain curiosity and she goes along, not thinking much of it.

funny, really, how a man with a glossy business card believes otherwise.

/

thirteen and scouted, thirteen and determined. thirteen and ready to go.

there’s absolutely no problem in pursuing a dream, her dad explains. but it becomes one when it involves having to relocate to seoul. not to mention entering an industry with such an infamous reputation. one known to take advantage of girls as young, pretty, talented as her. because regardless of how tough she thinks herself to be, there’ll always be someone smarter, tougher than she is. which explains why the final decision doesn’t come about immediately. he requests time to run through the various options. backup plans, educational plans. anything to reassure him (and her) that this venture will result in something. anything to make up for deviating from the plans that was initially put in place for her: study, postgraduate study, work. not: study, train, possible star.

“you can always come back. you know that, right?” “of course.”

extra money is tucked away at the bottom of her suitcase if the situation in seoul proves difficult. for the purchase of a ticket back home once she’s had enough and wants to return home to familiarity. safety. part of her thinks she might eventually do just that, while another part of her vows to stick it through, no matter what.

the latter, she learns, wins out.

/ her dance moves are awkward. her accent is horrendous. 

but thank god she can sing. six years of training pushes her to the brink, tests her patience, and almost breaks her. key word to note, almost. trainers are deemed sadists for their knack for picking apart her self esteem before she even has time to piece herself together again. they demand perfection, she tries her damn best to give it to them at the cost of her own sanity, health. happiness.

she gives and gives and gives. they take and take and take.

it’s not enough. but she hangs on anyway, grits her teeth and continues to push, striving towards a goal dangled cruelly out of reach. she watches trainees like her disappear. girls who share the same dream deciding to opt out from how difficult it is, this path to stardom. unable to cope with the ongoing pressure to conform to ridiculously high standards, like how she’s feeling.

except she takes it all as motivation to keep going, sinking her teeth to what she believes is rightfully hers, the chance to prove her worth. refusing to leave until they drag it away from her, by force.

and she’ll get her chance—upon debut.

/

“you’re debuting? really?” “yep, really. i’m actually gonna be television soon.” “that’s my girl.”

of course, she doesn’t tell her dad what she’s sacrificed to get this far. prefers to brush over the “minor” details than mention them, saving him the trouble of fussing over her. even if he has more than enough reason to.  like how she hasn’t eaten a proper meal in days, apart from the fifth ice cube meant to pass as a snack—or lunch. could be both, she isn’t sure at this point. the entire thing screams dangerous and unhealthy, except staff demand she look nothing less than amazing for debut. if that means forcing her body to cooperate, despite the warning signs begging her to stop, then so be it.

suffering, she learns, is the norm here. suffering, she’s told, is needed here. 

so that’s exactly what she does.

/ the taste of fame is just as she imagined: addictive, albeit with a slightly bitter aftertaste.  previous hardships are forgotten once honey gains traction and she’s immediately swept up in all it brings. performances, cfs, variety show appearances, being on the road to becoming a somebody than a nobody. consecutive early morning starts can be forgiven once she’s able to grace the stage, lapping up the attention from strangers who adore her. people who’ve fallen for the image msg has crafted for her.

( because isn’t this what she’s trained for? isn’t this what she’s always wanted? )

and maybe it’s just that, the satisfaction with the idol life that allows her to overlook the issues bubbling beneath the surface, threatening to ruin everything she’s worked so damn hard for. she’s done too much, come too far to turn her back on years of dedication, on a dream that’s been in motion for as long as she can remember. so she chooses to ignore, pretends none of it exists. it’s better that way.

praise makes up for the lack of sleep and back to back schedules.   fanchants distract her from thinking back to her last healthy, fulfilling meal. colourful stages overshadow her desire to return home and escape the attention.

this is what she’s always wanted: adoration.

[all-about-wannaone]

Wanna One as Disney Movie Characters (Maknae Line)

(I could not find a better gif omg)

And I am back with the second part of this series! ^^ In all honesty, the “Maknae” line was actually easier to research for than the “Hyung” line! ^^;; Nevertheless, I had a lot of fun writing this because I too discovered my childhood a little bit more and learnt a little more about the characters that I could not possibly comprehend at the age of 8 or 9. Once again, thank you @curryriceu for the interesting ask and hopefully, you (and all the rest) will enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed researching and typing out my rationales! ^^ Wishing you all a happy reading experience and before I start to ramble unnecessarily, here we go~ 

Part 1: Hyung Line (Yoon Jisung, Ha Sungwoon, Hwang Minhyun, Ong Seongwoo, Kim Jaehwan, Kang Daniel)

Park Jihoon: Peter Pan (Peter Pan)

First thing’s first, the extent of the maknae line in terms of characters escalated quickly from mature, high, mighty and brave characters to those that are a little more on the youthful and boyish side. To start things off, we have Park Jihoon as Peter Pan and there are many reasons why I have decided to associate him with this youthful and extremely fun-loving character. Despite the awkwardness that Jihoon seemed to portray in the beginning of Produce 101 Season 2, he was eventually discovered to be someone who was considerably boyish, playful and fun. Despite the fact that I (or perhaps anyone) never knew Peter Pan’s true age, he was always portrayed to be a young soul who loved to have fun and goofed around rather than solving issues which bring worry, fear and negativity. Hence, because Jihoon is young (and is my age haha), these are the things that the young would probably prefer doing; live happily, worry later... or should I say “Hakuna Matata”? However, when the occasion presses for it, Peter Pan was willing to step up to the plate and save his companions from the wrath of Captain Hook, which highlighted the fact that despite his playfulness and youth, it showed that he was capable of empathy, care and basically, a holistic sense of true human emotion. This could be shown HERE where the other members of the adorable “Oh Little Girl” team pulled a prank for his birthday, with Gunhee and Minki (Ren) being the main characters and getting into a petty argument. Sure, Jihoon might have stormed out due to the tense and uncomfortable atmosphere, but when Sewoon spoke to him, it was obvious that Jihoon did care for his team and was genuinely worried about how the team would get over such an obstacle. In short, this short video clearly shows the similarities between Jihoon and Peter Pan; preferring to stay out of negative and uncomfortable atmospheres but still showing care for his companions as a whole in secret. Lastly, despite Peter Pan’s young age, he was still brave and battled with Captain Hook to save his friends, even when he was almost killed in the process. Like Jihoon, he was always one to get through his own personal obstacles and insecurities and proved to the public that he was worthy to be in Wanna One, thus claiming #2 eventually in the final 11. 

Park Woojin: Baymax (Big Hero 6)

As you guys can probably tell, I’m actually quite a fan of Big Hero 6 and as I was doing this request, I could not help but associate Woojin with this white, huggable and cat-loving robot. In the movie as a robot, Baymax was extremely friendly and sociable, but his monotonous (but happy) voice made it seem like he was socially awkward with 99% friendliness and 1% awkwardness. Like Woojin, he was extremely uncomfortable with the A-graders when he first met them and preferred to stay quietly by the sidelines and honestly, we did not hear very much about him until the position evaluations when he joined the “Get Ugly” team and through the behind-the-scenes footage, we got a little more of an inkling to what he was really like and eventually, we got to know him as one who was extremely talkative when he was with people that he’s comfortable with, adorable with all his VJ-ing + extra footage and was definitely well loved by the older ones. Furthermore, Baymax was also extremely innocent, and that trait pretty much screamed “Park Woojin” to me and was never the type to hurt anyone, showcasing his gentle and caring side. Also, Baymax was also known to be extremely devoted to his cause of being a “personal healthcare companion”, both physically and emotionally, and was always there for the main character through thick and thin. Like Woojin, it was clear that he was very set on achieving his dream and did his best in everything, even when he was suffering from a serious case of shingles. He continued to perform “Never”, despite his condition and carried it out well together with the rest. After hospitalisation, he showed up again for the 3rd elimination to prove that he was determined and would not allow an illness to get him down. Even if I’m not sure whether he’s always there (lack of footage ahem mnet ahem) for the rest, it is clear that he is someone capable of deep conversation and would probably be a great listener. Sure, he might not talk very much but will definitely be a great source of comfort at any time and for anyone. It was also clear that he was well mannered and polite, just like Baymax. For the above traits, he was finally recognised to be someone worthy of Wanna One’s lineup, despite his quiet nature, and rose the ranks from #72 to clinching #6 at the very last episode.

Bae Jinyoung: EVE (WALL-E) 

Once again, as I was doing my research on the movies under Disney, I found another movie that I actually liked (but forgot) and it was one that actually brought me to tears despite the lack of dialogue; that is none other than WALL-E. Hence, I have decided to associate Bae Jinyoung with EVE which was also known as Extraterrestrial Vegetation Evaluator and often mistaken for Eva. In the beginning, EVE was definitely more refined and upon meeting WALL-E, she was actually hostile towards him and spared him no second thought. Similarly, in the beginning of Produce 101 Season 2, Jinyoung was known as the trainee who always looked as if he was deep in thought and often lacked the confidence in his abilities. Hence, with his seemingly stoic personality, awkward and intense aura, he then earned the name “Deep Dark” from the fans and viewers due to his lack of emotion and speech. Unfortunately, there were times when he had his moments of failure, especially when he dropped sharply from a C-grade to an F-grade due to his lack of confidence at the re-evaluations, but that did not stop him from continuing to work hard and work his way up the ranks. Soon after, he began to showcase his skills a little more through singing for his chosen song, “Spring Day”, and also showed more of his endearing and playful side (ahem winkdeep ahem). It was clear that he opened himself up significantly and definitely made some true friends throughout the course of Produce 101 such as Jihoon, Daehwi (my goodness have you guys seen it) and even Minhyun (who probably adopted him) and so much more. Similarly, for EVE, she became more friendly towards WALL-E after he had saved her from danger and they had officially introduced themselves to one another, which was her very first step to getting to know him better and vice versa. Indeed, Jinyoung came a long way from the beginning to the end and his constant hard work and dedication eventually granted him the 4th spot in the second last elimination and earned him the coveted “Centre” position for the iconic and eye-catching “Hands On Me” performance. He was no longer that unconfident, shy and awkward boy anymore; he became one who was extremely endearing, adorable and exceptionally confident, giving his all for his last performance. To some, getting into the top 11 was questionable for some but I must say that he actually did deserve the spot and is clearly capable of learning new things despite his young age. Lastly, despite this boy looking as if he’s too young to understand the bitterness of the world, it is clear that he is also caring towards his fellow mates, giving them long and sad hugs as well as words of encouragement when they either made it to the top 11 (i.e. Minhyun) or those who were eliminated.

Lee Daehwi: Joy (Inside Out)

I know I’m a little late to the party but up till now, I have never watched Inside Out. However, surprise surprise, because when I first got this request, Daehwi was the very first person that I thought of and it was none other than to be associated with this joyful and positive character. In the movie, Joy, as her name suggests, was always the optimistic one and provided hope in times of despair and doubt. Like her, Daehwi was definitely hopeful and was confident in his abilities, especially when he was deemed to be the “Next Somi” and was immediately sorted out into the A-grade together with the other Brand New Music trainees except Donghyun who went to the B-grade. Furthermore, he was also voted to be the “Centre” of “Pick Me season 2″ which earned him lots of screentime in my opinion. Unfortunately, it was definitely not met with good feedback from netizens (sIGHS) and it was only made worse when he had made a seemingly wise decision by choosing all the popular boys to be in his team for Boy In Luv. He was said to be too ambitious and greedy, but I could not deny that he had made a smart (but risky) decision to recruit all the popular ones which guaranteed his team victorious against Boy In Luv Team 2. Joy, in Inside Out, was also said to be extremely smart and always seemed to have everything under control, especially when she was the leader of Riley’s emotions. Despite all the hatred being thrown at him, he continued to work hard in order to showcase to the public a better version of himself and remained his happy-go-lucky self and still encouraged and cared for other trainees, even when he was going through these personal battles of his own. Personally, I came to realise that Daehwi was actually a literal smiley and talented angel, who always put others before himself and even risked his stand at some points (that infamous doubling incident) but it is clear that he too has matured throughout the show and I am glad National Producers came to realise this. Like Joy, she went through many ups and downs, but continued to remain caring towards the others and grew to become a better character towards the end, especially when it came to working with the other emotions and understanding them better. Despite all this, Daehwi emerged victorious anyway and he was able to come in 3rd in the final 11 lineup, like his rank in the very first episode. In short, Daehwi is pretty much the male version of Joy, not only in terms of their characters, but also in terms of their personal developments as well. 

Lai Guanlin: Prince Eric (The Little Mermaid) 

Surprisingly, Guanlin was the only one in the “Maknae Line” to get something a little more on the mature side because nothing seemed to have fit him better than Prince Eric of The Little Mermaid. Firstly, Prince Eric was known to be a little more on the stoic side, and always remained calm, whatever the situation. Honestly, when I read this, he immediately reminded me of Guanlin’s calmness throughout the entire show. Sure, he was definitely a sentimental boy, but he never showed any form of sadness, even when he faced a drastic drop from #2 to #20 in the second last elimination and being the trainee who barely survived the change in rules. Furthermore, being young, I feel like he would be the type to probably fall in love very easily and that was Prince Eric, who immediately fell in love with “the mysterious girl with the beautiful voice”. He was exceptionally determined to find her and was sure that he would marry her after she had saved him to show his deep gratitude towards her (which is obviously NOT something that anyone would do in real life). Furthermore, Prince Eric, despite being a prince, was said to be fun-loving and that was pretty much Guanlin who never failed to enjoy all the experiences given to him. It was not easy, especially when he came from Taiwan with very limited vocabulary, but it was clear that he made the most out of it and continued to aim high, even though the odds were stacked against him when he went from a D-grade to an F-grade. However, Prince Eric was also mature and that was definitely something that I had learnt about Guanlin. He was only 15/16 when he decided to come to Korea to achieve his dream, knowing that the journey was not going to be easy, but he pressed on and said so himself that he would not be willing to go back because becoming a Kpop star was what he came for, and there was no way that he was going back to his hometown without a fight. Through this, it also highlighted his determination and dedication for his dream, whereas for Prince Eric, it was to find the girl named Ariel, whom he would later discover. Sometimes, I do feel that Guanlin still has more to learn (because he has only been training for 6 months), but he still deserved 7th place anyway because he worked for it and fought bravely despite the sudden turn of the tables. Lastly, I must say... Doesn’t Prince Eric actually remind you of Guanlin physically? Maybe it’s just me, but the more I look at it, the more I feel it resembles Guanlin, and this was probably the most holistic rationale ever on why Guanlin became Prince Eric instead of a cute character this time around. 

And once again folks, I am done with another requested series! ^^ Boy, it sure was tough getting to this point, especially all the research and thought that I had to put into it, however, it was still a pretty good experience to push myself out of the comfort zone to write something like this. Furthermore, isn’t it only right to actually work hard for all my readers, followers and noters? :) Now, I am close to reaching 200 followers and almost 700 likes and reblogs. ;; I don’t know what to say really, but thank you so much for all your support and love omg, ;_; I hope all of these have brought smiles (and laughter) to your days and I will, hopefully, continue to do so as a form of gratitude. :’)

With regards to request, I will be opening them up till Sunday, 9th July 2017, in light of the school holiday today so happy requesting for more and I hope to see you guys in my inbox and askbox! Goodbye for now and I will see you again in another exciting series coming up! :D 

[torterragarden]

top 5 female and top 5 male characters in anything (top 10 if 5 isnt enough), add reasons if you want to 🙋 and a happy new year 🙌

OKAY SO I’M FINALLY GETTING AROUND TO POSTING MY ANSWER FOR THIS THANK YOU FOR BEING PATIENT. I spent so much time thinking about this because I loved this question and I ended up coming up with a top 10 female characters + reasons and I probably went way overboard like this is so long and I’m sorry. So unfortunately I haven’t made a list for male characters because I got so extra with this female characters list, but another time perhaps. Anyway, top 10 female characters here we go!!

10. Piper Mclean, Heroes of Olympus series - I think what I really like about Piper is that she has a lot of qualities that badly written female characters tend to have, but… she’s written well. What I mean is like… Piper is selfish. She’s whiny. She’s a brat. She’s emotional. Usually when a female character has traits like that, she isn’t likable and probably wasn’t intended to be. But Piper is given a depth and respect that those other female characters aren’t usually afforded. She’s flawed, but she knows it, and she hates her flaws and she tries to better herself. And she’s more than those flaws too! She’s brave and kind and loving, and her emotions - all of them, no matter how ugly - are ultimately her strength. I love that she’s allowed to be so emotional, that it’s good that she’s so emotional, because I feel like there’s this idea that female characters have to be emotionless in order to be “strong” or whatever so anyway yeah I love Piper

9. Emily Davis, Until Dawn - I have a knack for taking a liking to female characters that the majority of the fandom hates, and then loving them even more out of spite. Admittedly, a lot of my aggressive love for Emily is a reaction to the amount of (unfair, reeking of double standards and sexism) hatred she gets in the fandom, but even disregarding that, I do really like her. I started liking her very early on in Until Dawn. She seemed like she had a lot of personality and I liked that, and I only liked her more as the game went on. I mean… I literally have a post listing all of the reasons that I love Emily so that should tell you everything, right?

8. Amethyst, Steven Universe - I hesitated to put Amethyst on the list, since I’m not sure if she technically counts as “female”, but at the very least I think it’s fair to say that she’s female-coded and female-aligned so… I thought it would be okay? She would probably have been a lot higher up if not for the fact that I’ve lost a lot of my interest in SU, but I still love Amethyst a hell of a lot. I relate to her very strongly, for reasons that are not super comfortable to talk about. Much like Amethyst, I tend to bottle up everything and let it eat away at me until everything just explodes in the ugliest way. I think very little of myself, but I try my best to stay chill-passing because I’d rather die than tell anyone how I’m actually feeling. I don’t like going into detail about this but basically Amethyst is important to me because I relate to her in a lot of ugly and painful ways, and loving Amethyst is almost like learning to love myself. Almost.

7. Princess Bubblegum, Adventure Time - It’s funny that Adventure Time as a whole is one of those “I Definitely Like This But I’m Not Super Passionate About It” things, but there are like, four things in that show that I do feel Super Passionate about. Princess Bubblegum is one of them (the other three are Ice King, Marceline, and Bubbline, in case you were wondering). Gotdamn dude I love Princess Bubblegum and I think she doesn’t get nearly enough attention for being as interesting as she is. From the beginning I loved how she was simultaneously really sweet and morally ambiguous, that’s a really funny and intriguing dichotomy. I love that while she’s ultimately working for the Greater Good™, she’s really ruthless and vindictive. She has good intentions but she’s so very flawed, and she can be downright terrifying. Bubblegum is just endlessly fascinating to me and I really love her.

6. Cassie Cage, Mortal Kombat - Well obviously she had to be on this list, she’s where I got my url from. My love for Cassie Cage is less about who she is and more about what she represents to me, I think. Mortal Kombat isn’t exactly known for having great depictions of female characters but they did improve a lot in Mortal Kombat X, and I fell in love with Cassie partially because, to me, she embodied a lot of the positive changes. I loved that she was the heroine of MKX, I loved that she wasn’t overtly sexualized, I loved that she was funny and confident and just so damn cool, in that way that classic action heroes are cool. Chewing bubblegum and flipping people off and sassing everyone and just being exactly what comes to mind when you think “bad ass”. She was so different and so unexpected and I was so pleasantly surprised with Cassie Cage.

5. Katniss Everdeen, The Hunger Games - Katniss is one of the most important fictional characters ever written okay. This is a girl who grew up in extreme poverty, who took it upon herself to take care of her family at age 12, who was hardened because of her circumstances but still compassionate, and still so vulnerable. She suffered from severe PTSD, she was used as a pawn by the Capitol and by the rebels, she was manipulated and taken advantage of and she lost everything because of it. And in the end she still found a way to stand up and keep going. She didn’t magically get better but she made a life worth living for herself, even if she had to constantly remind herself of the good things in her life. I fucking love Katniss okay.

4. Jaehee Kang, Mystic Messenger - Yeah I kind of feel like trash for having a character from a god damn dating sim on here but tbh Mystic Messenger is so good it makes me angry (you are a dating sim what business do you have being that good fuck you) so I don’t feel too much like trash. Only a little bit like trash. Anyway, Jaehee. Holy god where do I even start. She is just so beautiful. That’s the first word that comes to mind, and I’m not even talking about her appearance (although yeah she’s definitely very attractive). It’s just her, man. She is so kind, so patient, so hard-working, so strong after everything she’s been through. I love that even though outwardly she’s more serious and formal than most of the other characters, there’s this underlying sweetness and quirkiness that shines through, like when she fangirls over Zen or when she says things like “benefits were effing amazing” when explaining to her boss why hosting fundraising parties is a good idea. I also love that as kind and polite as she is, she can and will mercilessly drag people she’s a fucking savage and I love her. I just love her so much. Jaehee is effing amazing.

3. Asami Sato, Legend of Korra - First of all, she’s canonically a bisexual woman in a relationship with another bisexual woman and that’s super important to me for representation. Second of all, even before Korrasami was made canon I really adored Asami. Because seriously, Asami is one of the kindest and most loyal characters in anything ever, she is such a good person through and through, even though there are so many things that have happened to her that sound like the sort of things that would motivate most characters to be villains. Her mother was murdered, her father was a terrorist who betrayed her and threatened to kill her friends, her boyfriend cheats on her, her closest friend and love interest leaves her for three years, her father fucking dies in front of her after they had just barely started to reconcile. Asami faces so much tragedy, if anyone has a right to be an asshole it would be her, yet she is still so unfailingly kind and brave and good. Also, for the record, she is probably the prettiest animated character I have ever seen in my life.

2. Agent Texas, Red vs Blue - Okay so. Red vs Blue has a lot of… issues with how it writes the few female characters it has, and I’m not going to act like Tex is this amazingly well written female character because she’s really not. But this isn’t my top 10 well-written female characters this is my top 10 favorite female characters, and whatever writing problems RvB may have, I really do love Tex. So much. It’s also a bit complicated to love Tex cause it’s like… which one lmao. I love Beta!Tex, who was tough and snarky and effortlessly bad ass, but also kind and compassionate and very, very chill. Like sure she could kick your ass and you know she could, but eh, she doesn’t really need to. The fact that you know she could is enough. And then there’s Epsilon!Tex, who was just angry, but who in many ways was the most important iteration of Tex to me. She was angry because ffs she was tired of not being her own person. She was tired of Church seeing her as His Girlfriend and not much else, she was tired of being Allison’s shadow, tired of her existence being all about other people, never about herself. Tex’s story is ultimately about a search for agency, to create an identity for herself separate from what other people want from her, and that’s always stuck with me.

1. Hermione Granger, Harry Potter - Honestly, I’m not sure if I’m putting her here because she is genuinely my favorite female character, or I’m putting her here because I can’t imagine putting anyone else here. Though I guess if I can’t imagine putting someone else here, that’s a sign that she is my favorite? Idk. I like Harry Potter less than I once did, less than I think a lot of people in my life realize, but being a Harry Potter Fan is such a big part of my identity to them that I don’t think they can see me any other way. But, even with my enthusiasm for HP these days being relatively low, I can’t deny that the series had a huge impact on me growing up and it definitely did a lot to shape the type of person I am, and it’s always going to be a bit special because of that. Hermione played a big part. She was one of the first female characters I can remember really admiring. I was nothing like her but I wanted to be, because she was smart and bad ass and complex and honestly do I even need to explain why Hermione is amazing? You all know. However I feel about HP now, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forget the impact it had on me and I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forget Hermione.

[nostalqia-archived]

･ﾟ ̣ 01; oh death, where is thy sting? ›

the fragility of life was never something that was touched upon before death stared him right in the eye and forced upon him its presence.

when he closes his eyes he can almost remember it, especially the crimson stained carpet that his mother had loved so much. it was a pearl color; she had been specific about that, not eggshell or cream. the glass of chateau margaux she had poured herself had fallen along with her, though not a single thing besides anything related to her was misplaced. the crack in the balcony window, the white silk curtains still flapping from the wind, and her, his mother, dead on the floor, though so elegantly. it was all too perfect, even for his family, but people mourned. they gave their respects to his father, a man who had never shed a tear for anyone but himself, now seemingly distraught at the loss of his wife. people mourned, because she was kang jihye, and she was unlike others.

“chin up hyunsoo. no pouting. now remember sweetie, this isn’t for us. there are many others out there who are less fortunate than we are, and we need to look out for them. because hyunsoo, we already have so much. we need to give back to the community. we don’t need all of this, now do we?”

people also mourned, because where there was a loss of a loved one, there was a powerful and vulnerable billionaire. women played their hands in the game and the enigma that was his father, though he was not nearly as devastated as he seemed to be. women held him down from his love of power and glory, and so he politely declined, stating he wasn’t ready yet, that his love for his deceased wife was still strong, and hyunsoo would scoff. it would earn him colored spots along his already beaten body that lasted weeks, but he was defiant when he was younger. what an idiot he was then.

“why am i telling you all this?” he asks the poor individual strapped into the seat in front of him. a look of pure hatred comes across the other’s features, though hyunsoo could only reciprocate with a defiant smile. it held no genuine emotion. everything he did was for show now, he supposed. why not this?

his senses have become accustomed to the stale air around them and the constant dripping of water echoing throughout the background. dramatic, he knew, though he had chosen it for that specific reason. he was still a man of humor, though not many were given the opportunity to see it. “because,” he continues on, a bloodied hand reaching over to take the glass of bourbon he had poured himself, bringing it to his lips. “then you can know what kind of man you’ve been working for. given, i’m not much of a picnic either, but wouldn’t you much rather help me? when you compare what my father has done to this, y’know it’s not that bad. what i’ve done is just a bit more … invasive. strictly in the physical sense, of course.”

it’s a look of hatred, that’s certain, but there’s also deep seated fear that’s beginning to climb into his eyes, and hyunsoo can tell. there were always breaking points; some had them earlier than others, and fortunately for him, it seemed the poor soul’s limit was approaching as the dirtied knife made another entrance.

“nothing can save us forever hanju-ssi,” he muses, lips curving upwards as the man’s screams fill the room, the blunt knife digging deeper into the already splayed out wound. “but what you tell me may save you for today. and that’s enough, right? death catches up to us. it’s a greedy one, i’ll tell you. it takes its bony fingers and wraps it around you like you’re supposed to belong to it. and maybe we do. but it allows us time, doesn’t it? it gives us enough so we finished what we’ve been placed here for. look at me, getting all philosophical,” he chuckles, turning the weapon rather slowly and checking up on the man once more. “so, tell me hanju. is there going to be anything you regret when it comes for you?”

and he breaks.

he wonders when and where he had started to lose himself. ryu hyunsoo was an alcoholic playboy billionaire. ryu hyunsoo was the suave son of multibillionaire, ryu chulsoon. he was this, whatever it was: a psychopath who enjoyed spilling blood to get dirt on his father, and he was a mercenary of some sorts, but along the way all that had become a facade. he smiled in public, joked around with close ones, and drank until he could no longer stomach it, but even while he was elbow deep in someone else’s guts, there had always been one driving force. it was probably why he wasn’t afraid as the tip of the weapon dragged against the man’s jugular, red filling every one of his senses. he waits for the man to bleed out. he listens for the choking that ensues, and he bathes in the scent of iron. he waits, because patience is key.

“nothing saves us forever.” he repeats into the room he now occupies alone, though it’s not for himself. nothing’s ever been.

and so death as stared him in the eye when it came to pick up his mother,  it does as it comes tptake this man’s as well, smiling down at him as if it was telling him that he was next. terror was not something that came along with death’s visits. it never had been, even as a child. instead, defiant as he ever was, he was ready. since death’s first visit he had been ready, because it would not be by death’s hands he would be taken away, but by his own.