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snowe-zolynn-rogers · 5 years ago

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Pairings: Romantic Dukexiety, Romantic Loginceit

Word Count: 1971 Words

Summary: Logan ducks out to prove a point but it doesn’t work out when the light sides don’t care.

Warnings: Sympathetic Deceit/Morally Grey Deceit, Morally Grey Remus, Unsympathetic/Abusive Patton, Ducking Out, Manipulation, Physical Abuse, Violence, Accidental Injury, Head Injury, let me know if I should add anything else.

Note: Anything like ‘this�� is an thoughts. Bold like this is a lie.

Somebody’s Gonna Get Hurt

He could feel their joy with his leaving. It made his chest burn with anger, they were supposed to care about him leaving! Logan growled slightly at the subconscious and decided to wander around until he got to the dark side of the conscious.

Both dark sides who had exposed themselves to Thomas were outside behind a house almost like to the Mind Palace but more cathedral-like and castley than the home Roman had created. He could see spiral staircase towers.

Two of windows on the back two towers were open revealing a library and a craft room. It looked like a beautiful dream to see the castle Remus had made for just him and Deceit. And the garden the snakelike side kept around it made it even prettier.

Deceit was taking care of a bed of what looked like and was about to move onto the cymbidium orchids and yellow ranunculus flowers while Remus was running around with two dogs, a husky and a Samoyed, seemingly playing with them.

Deceit was occasionally throwing a glance to Remus to check on the green side as the demented side conjured dog toys like no tomorrow until he got tackled by two fluffy, happy dogs. He wanted to be a part of a family like that. Logan nearly froze and stopped breathing when Remus noticed him.

“Oh, hey, Logibear! Whatcha doing on this side of the Mind?” The creative side greeted him, getting Deceit’s full attention and the deceitful side turned to look at them.

“Logan?” The yellow side asked, brushing his front clean of the dirt from the garden.

“Hi.” He greeted them awkwardly.

“Are you ducking out?” Remus asked, looking into the dark subconscious Logan had come from.

“I am, yes.” Logan admitted.

“Well, you can always not visit us, Logan.” Deceit reminded him.

“I’ll keep that invitation in mind, thank you.” The blue side accepted.

“Don’t be safe!” Deceit called after him.

“Wouldn’t want you getting torn limb from limb!” Roman chirped happily. “Sorry.” The demented side added not a second later.

“Thank you, I will.” So he retreated back to the darkness to move his room back since it wasn’t even working, the light sides weren’t coming to get him even after a week when it had only taken a day of Virgil being ducked out.

He tried to ignore the gnawing feeling at Patton’s thinly veiled disappointment and Virgil’s discomfort at him coming back. He even managed a smile when Roman didn’t notice the difference because he’d been so busy all week. At least Roman has a seeable reason to ignore his absence.

So he made good on his acceptance of Deceit’s offer and began stopping by the dark castle to inform them of the current situation of the Mindscape or even just to be around people who actually listened. It was a complete turn visiting them than visiting the light sides.

The lights all stayed in their rooms and only came out for discussions. But here, both occupants were always out of their rooms and keeping each other company. Hell, the first time he’d come over Remus was dancing around the living room to music while Deceit and Logan had made tea and dinner in the kitchen.

They interacted and it didn’t feel forced like it did with the light sides. Logan liked it here, he felt wanted. So he kept going, and, eventually, got accepting into their odd, happy little family. Then Patton and Virgil found out where he disappeared to on Fridays.

“You can’t just leave us, Logan!” Patton yelled at him.

“I’m not!” Logan insisted.

“You’re a dark side!” Patton snapped.

“I visit them and we talk about space and philosophy and fantasy!” Logan shot back.

“Lo, you should leave.” Virgil croaked out.

“What?” Logan asked.

“You need to leave! Dark sides aren’t allowed in the light!” Virgil snapped at him. Logan glared at them but left to Deceit and Remus again and the blue and green sides moved his room to the castle Remus lovingly called the Mind Castle. It was huge inside, it made his room bigger with more capacity for creative control.

He loved being here. But there was the issue of discussions being difficult. He would still show up to debates like nothing had changed, or, at least until Remus showed up again and Patton sighed and groaned and whined about having two dark sides present.

“Ugh, why would you dark sides leave us alone!?” Roman visibly recoiled at that.

“Patton, what-” Roman tried to ask.

“Shut up, Princey! Don’t side with the dark sides!” Virgil snapped at him.

“What are you talking about?” Thomas asked.

“Patton and Virgil told me I’m a dark side so I had to move my room to the dark side of your mind.” Logan explained.

“Hey, you didn’t say anything about being forced!” Remus looked at the blue side.

“I felt the reason of my leaving was unnecessary to share. I’m not one of you, after all, you wouldn’t truly care.” Remus gave an offended scoff.

“Like hell would I not care! You’re family, of course I care! Dee loves you and that means you’re family to me! I care about you just the same as I care about Dee and Virgil!” Remus exclaimed to make his point. Virgil shifted away.

“Virgil, you’re still a dark side?” Patton asked darkly.

“No, I’m not! I swear! I’ve changed, Pat! I’m not one of them!” Virgil tried to convince the aqua side.

“I took you in! I accepted you!” Virgil backed up on the stairs and nearly tripped on them.

“Pat, you’re scaring me.” Virgil gripped the bannister, trying to move back away from the fatherly side.

“I’ll give you something to be scared of.” Patton growled and stalked to the purple side, grabbing into his hair and smacking him across the face. Remus swung his morningstar toward Patton, intending revenge for hurting Virgil. But, unable to stop the trajectory from where Patton once stood, he couldn’t stop his weapon from colliding with Virgil when Patton moved out of the way.

“Virgil!” The green side exclaimed, his weapon poofing from existence just the second before Virgil hit the ground. Remus dropped to his knees and checked over the the anxious side’s unconscious body. “Vee, come on, wake up.” Remus tried to convince him, but he didn’t.

“He’s useless anyway. Let him die.” Patton snapped, kicking Virgil’s feet out of his way as he went back to his spot.

“This is your fault! You did this! You moved him into the way!” Remus screamed at him, knocking the aqua side over, anger practically tangible as Thomas came over to check on Virgil too, shaking his side a bit in the an attempt to wake him.

“Don’t move him. He might head trauma. Let me see him.” Logan told him, turning on the flashlight on his phone and opened Virgil’s eyes to look into them, finding uneven pupils. “He has a concussion.” Logan announced as he turned off his phone’s flashlight.

“How dare you-” Patton tried to yell at Remus for making him fall.

“Shut up! Just shut up! You made me hurt him!” Remus screamed at him, trying to stem the blood flow from Virgil’s head. Roman soon joined him once his shock wore off, trying to heal the wound. Patton angrily sank out, practically fuming.

“Please be alive, Vee. I love you too much for you to leave me like this.” Virgil gave a soft groan, moving a little bit to curl up more. Remus bursted into tears at the movement. “Virgil, please wake up.” Remus practically begged the purple side.

“Ree?” Virgil whined, eyes refusing to open, but he was at least responsive.

“Virgil, can you open your eyes for me?” Logan asked him.

“I’m tired, mom.” Virgil slurred out.

“Virgil, I’m not your mother, please open your eyes for me.” Virgil opened his eyes slowly, eyes darting around, still uneven, but he had managed to open them and was, again, responsive.

“Virgil, do you feel any pain?” Logan asked.

“Too loud.” Virgil tried to cover his ears but Logan held his hands away from his head.

“So you have a headache?” Logan asked.

“Let me go, Patton! I’ll be good, I promise!” Virgil tried to fight away from him, beginning to hypervenilate and have an anxiety attack.

“Virgil, breathe. Patton isn’t here, he can’t hurt you.” Logan assured him, which calmed the anxious side down significantly and he stopped fighting away.

“I don’t feel good.” Virigl warned. Roman immediately conjured a bucket that the purple side immediately threw up into.

“He definitely has head trauma. I’d need to run tests later once I make sure he doesn’t have any seizures.” Logan alerted them.

“Seizures?” Remus asked, eyes shining with fear. He understood that look. He was scared he’d hurt Virgil forever, he was scared he’d ruined Virgil from ever functioning the same again.

“He’ll be okay, Remus. Even if he does end up having seizures. It wasn’t your fault, I’m sure he knows that.” Logan assured him. Virgil groaned, trying to stand stubbornly but Roman kept him from moving around too much and Thomas supported his stumbling anxiety.

“Virgil, come on. You need to lie down.” Logan admonished him, Roman thankfully having the mind to sit Virgil on the couch and keep him there. Virgil was just confused, Logan knew, but his patient was quite frustrating when he couldn’t keep a good handle on him.

“Good, thank you, Roman. Remus can you conjure a medical pole? I’ll need to get saline and anti-seizure medication into him somehow.” Logan told the twins.

“On it, Teach.” Remus did as Logan asked and Logan himself conjured the medical supplies, saline, and depakote himself. Virgil didn’t seem to want to move this time, even while Logan rolled up his sleeve and put the needle into his elbow.

“Virgil, you can move your arm if you want, it’s not a needle, it’s tubing to get the saline in.” Purple eyes gazed at him for a moment before the other side gave a groan and turned to his side, going back to sleep.

Logan didn’t want to move him once he’d fallen asleep. So they all stayed there for the time being. Remus did summon Deceit, though, so the snake could be informed of the situation.

After a bit of the IV going, Logan put a dose of the anti-seizure medication into the IV and Virgil whined in his sleep but didn’t complain much more than that. That night, they all took shifts to watch Virgil to make sure he’d be okay.

And, in the morning, Virgil seemed much the same but that was pretty expected, he’d need a bit of help for a little bit while he healed. It shouldn’t take more than a week with his healing ability as a side.

And, now that Patton was lurking in the shadows, Logan returned to the light sides, taking Remus and Deceit along with him and the twins combined their much-loved homes to be half of either one, a wonderful mix of everyone as the rooms expanded to the size of Remus’ castle rooms while retaining the comfy, cozy feeling Roman’s creations gave off.

Virgil eventually healed right up well enough and Logan got his ‘fairy tale ending’ with Deceit and Roman. Logan wouldn’t complain with how cute Deceit was cuddled up to his front, asleep, as Roman laid behind him, backs pressed together as the romantic side worked on his current writing on his phone. He couldn’t ask for more.

Taglist: @youre-not-alive @vicdehart @emile-crunchybutter

#sanders sides #unsympathetic patton #sympathetic deceit #abusive patton #romantic dukexiety #dukexiety #romantic loginceit #loginceit #tw ducking out #tw manipulation #tw physical abuse #tw violence #tw injury #snoweywrites

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silcorynard · 3 years ago

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👁️ EYE - what colour are their eyes? do people notice their eyes? is there anything special about them (shows emotion easily, literally magical...)

One of the man’s titles is ‘The Eye of Zaun’, a nickname given half out of spite and half out of fear of his left eye. His right eye is blue, and the left must have been, before it was replaced by an unblinking, inhuman orb of black and crimson. It is his most noticable feature, though it might be considered a bit rude to stare. Rude, and unwise for one’s continued existence. Many myths have sprung up around Silco’s eye, the reason it was lost and how it came to be replaced, but the truth is known by only two other people.

🤥 LYING - are they good liars? do they have tells to show they're lying?

Silco would be a very good liar, if he ever had the need to. However, he has never had need for deception. He is a very good businessman and has always had a nose for unearthing secrets. There are plenty of ways to get what one wants and to secure a better Zaun than lying. Extortion, threats, the weight of a personality? Of course. But lying? He’s better than that. Honesty is the best policy.

If he did lie, it would be with a smile.

👻 GHOST - do they believe in ghosts? what are their "ghostly experiences", if any?

He is a man too grounded in the day-to-day to be too greatly concerned with matters of spirituality, and his close calls with death have left him somewhat numbed to the idea of an afterlife. However, Runeterra has its Harrowing annually, and when the Institute of War still stood there were horrors encased within those walls that science and rationality cannot explain.

But no. No ghosts have visited him, which is a shame. He does miss his parents.

💥 COLLISON - what emotions do they have trouble dealing with?

Grief. Joy.

From the mines to the boardroom, there is no time to grieve, to mourn, to weep. When there is work to be done, when one’s life and the life of your community depend on you, you do not have the luxury to wallow. Put it aside, swallow it down, bury it. There’s no time. Honour the lost with your work, and never ever think about how it could have been different if only you had just...

There’s work to be done. You don’t have time to sing and dance or smile or laugh. Showing joy makes others envy, and when they envy, they take. Joy is fleeting. Don’t celebrate it, because whatever makes you happy will be gone soon. Don’t trust it. Just focus on what needs to be done.

😭 CRYING - what makes them cry? do they cry easily?

Years of the above rationalisations, of survivor’s guilt, of obsession and drive, have numbed Silco’s emotional core. Not to mention, he’s also missing half of his tear ducts. There have been plenty of involuntary ‘seizures’, in his younger years, sobbing in private, but these became rarer as he started to push himself. Since his teenage years, he has cried only twice: he cried when he woke on the doctor’s table, after Vander’s betrayal, and he cried for his daughter, begging her to leave behind her delightful purgatory.

👊 PUNCH - are they quick to violence?

Despite the rumours and reputation, no. Silco is a clever and a patient man, and there are far more effective ways to ruin someone than by, say, clawing out their eye and trying to drown them.

💢 ANGER - what are some habits they have that will take some getting used to?

He needs to inject his eye regularly, to keep his body from rejecting it. Not many people enjoy watching - or thinking about - sticking a needle in an eyeball. He also has a determined paternal care for Jinx, and her constant presence and behaviour is almost as offputting as his own stoic coldness.

👪 FAMILY - what is their family like? what is your ocs relationship to them? does your oc have any siblings?

He was an only child, to parents who could not have any more children after him. He never found out why his parents decided to only have him, when families who had more children were rewarded by the mining company. Maybe that was it? He misses them, sometimes. He misses their love.

He has a few people that he trusts, like Sevika and the Doctor, but after Vander’s betrayal the idea of trusting anyone like one trusts family is patently absurd. Jinx is the exception that proves the rule: she is his daughter, he is her father, and nothing will change that.

😨 FEARFUL - when scared, do they go into "flight" or "fight"?

It depends on the fear. He is a man who plans ahead, who prepares for the worst. He is not often fearful, because he usually chooses to be angry. But on the rare occasions he is made to be afraid, he is not ‘fight’ or ‘flight’: he is ‘freeze’.

💤 SLEEPING - do they fall asleep easily? what helps them sleep?

Silco finds it difficult to sleep. Narcotics assist, most of the time, as does overwork and/or physical exhaustion. He is too hardwired to danger and short notice to sleep deeply, and though he doesn’t remember his dreams they are often nightmares, and not condusive to restfulness.

(Original post here)

#a matter of opinion #Seen and Heard

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gomustanggirl16 · 7 years ago

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PASS THE HAPPY!💜 When you see this, reply with 5 things that make you happy and send this to the last 10 people in your notifications!😊

Five things that make me happy: Not gonna lie, I can list a whole book of things that’ll piss me off easier than this.

1. Comments on new works or new chapters. I love seeing a “you got mail” message in my inbox. It makes me happy to know you guys are following along with the story and are as invested in it as I am.

2. Doughnuts. I mean I like ‘em, but they’re just at the forefront of my mind right now because I got fresh baked ones from the fire house last night and if you miss the order dates you have to wait a whole month and I didn’t this time! Though they had to call me because I forgot I actually remembered to order them.

2 cont. Food in general. I’m a person whose moods shift when I haven’t eaten. I become irrational and bitchy. So if you ever have to tell me something I don’t like, it’s best to do it over food or else my mind will just go into panic mode. Especially if it’s been a long day and I haven’t stopped moving.

3. Finding something really nice, on sale and saving a shit ton of money. I love Zulily. LOVE IT. I went to a yard sale at the local church on Saturday and got a picnic basket used, but in good condition, then I found a silver serving tray that has a patern to match the drink tray my grandmother passed down to me. I got that thing for $2 It’s work anywhere from $60-$90 depending on it’s condition so I was excited. And then I found a Belgium Linen Tea table cloth and napkin set, except one napkin was missing sadly but the ribbons weren’t even taken off the set, it was never used! The details are subtle in it’s lace and I love it. Wish I could find more on the maker though, but the store on the tag has been closed for over a decade now and was open since the late 1800s so I doubt anyone could tell me anything so that maybe I could replace the missing napkin but all in all i got it for $4 so hey not bad. I like finding old treasures because it reminds me of a simpler time and how things used to be. I’d gone there looking for missing pieces to my great grandmothers china set.

4. When my brother tells me about his day or anything really. He’s not the type to share often and while we live under the same roof still we don’t always cross paths, so when he does talk to me or tell me something it’s not something I take for granted.

5. My job...sometimes. I work as a banquet server, I work mostly weddings and golf outings for a country club. I’m a glorified waitress. I’m paid to go unnoticed and wear black. While my boss would like to think she’s the reason why things are successful she’s not. Without us she’d sink and so would your big day. We don’t get tipped, we often go without complements and have to deal with drunk people who think they rule world. I see brides who are bitchy and complain, I’ll never forget the member wedding when one of the waitresses on our restaurant side had a seizure and no one knew because she’d gone into the PDR to change the table clothes and the doors had closed. An ambulance was called when we found her and I had to try and keep people inside the ball room so they wouldn't see. Of course that didn’t last long and the bride came to me asking if it was a guest I said no and then she proceeded to go to another staff member and demand we move the ambulance because it was in the way of her sparkler send off.

Then there the was the one wedding that is the reason I do what I do. We were cleaning up and things hadn’t gone the smoothest, they could have been better but the mother of the bride came up to us and she said this “I just want to thank you. It’s been hard and today was the first time our family had been together in one place since our sons funeral three years ago. I had no idea my son in law was going to ask me to dance let alone to Over the Rainbow. I used to sing it to my kids when they were little. You guys really helped make tonight special for all of us.” I had tears in my eyes. I see bitchy brides, I see sweetheart couples, I sometimes have a hard time because they remind me of past loved ones like the high school sweethearts back in the fall and it was like looking back in time at my cousin and his wife at their wedding...she died almost ten years ago from suicide and I had to take a breather but I get to watch people starting a new chapter in their lives with someone they love, and while It’s hard to imagine why people get married these days it gives me hope and joy to know I helped make it special.

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gingerbreadjen · 7 years ago

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An open letter to Taylor Swift

August 20, 2009 was one of the worst days of my life; on this day I found out that my mom had breast cancer. My strong, selfless, sweet, kind, caring mom was diagnosed with something I couldn’t bring myself to wrap my head around. It was the first day of my Senior year in High School and I’ll never forget the feeling in the pit of my stomach as I tried to comprehend what my stepdad was trying to get through to me once I returned from school that day. I remember feeling scared. I was scared that after everything, after all we had been through, losing my mom to cancer was now a possibility in our lives. My mom is a warrior. When I was a child, my mom not only suffered from Grave’s disease, but she suffered from a highly physically and mentally abusive marriage. Seeing my mom suffer from seizures while my dad wouldn’t even come into the house to aide his two young daughters in our effortless cries, panic and fear that we did not understand. I am going to turn this letter away from my father, because he doesn’t deserve the attention, let alone my words, but I think it is important to mention because it has defined who I am.

When my mom started chemo-therapy everything became real. I remember having an interview at a clothing store the day she shaved her head. Selfishly, I did not want to return home. I did not want to accept the fact that my mom was sick and that the first big change would be that all of her beautiful hair was now in a trash can somewhere. The feeling of defeat, guilt, and anger consumed me. Why is this happening, I thought. Why does it have to be my mom that is sick? Why is life so unfair?

This is where you come in. I will never forget the opening beat to Fearless: I would be in my room, shut out from the world. But as soon as I would hear the opening verse to that song I knew it was okay. I would come out of my room and there would be my mom in the kitchen. With her cap on dancing and singing to Fearless. I would enter and we would dance together and everything felt okay. Anytime I heard your album playing, I felt relief. I truly believe that Fearless brought my mom back to life. The amount of love, joy, and happiness that your album brought to my mother helped me fall in love with your music. I know you probably hear stories like mine all the time, but I just feel like I need to share this with you. I have been trying to write this letter for at least 2 years now. I tried to start when you released the news about your mom but I didn’t know how; I don’t know what has taken me so long to get the words written down but it’s here now.

I am happy to report that my mom beat cancer, but I am sad to report that she is not doing great. In May 2013 the doctors found a brain tumor. The tumor was caused by the radiation she received to beat her cancer. She could still function, but she had lost all feeling in the right side of her face. I yelled, I cursed, I cried, and I felt defeated again. My mom underwent radiation again but we were told she would never regain feeling on the right side of her face again. Fast forward to December 2016; my new, incredible boyfriend took my to Disneyland and Universal Studios for a vacation. The feeling of happiness and elatedness to be so lucky was something I wanted to last forever. And it did until my stepdad picked me up from the airport. Once again my world came crumbling down. The doctors had found a new brain tumor. How is this happening and why does this keep happening to such a wonderful woman, I kept asking myself. It’s been almost a year but things still are not great. Seeing my mom deteriorate before my eyes is the worst thing that has ever happened to me. It hurts so much to see someone so kind knocked down and kicked over and over and over again. I know everyone thinks that their mother is the best, and I do not doubt their claims; but I have to say that my mom is the most genuine, selfless, giving, sweet, I could go on for days, woman I have ever known and I don’t know what I would do without her.

All in all, I just want to thank you, from the bottom of my heart, Taylor. Because I honestly do not know what I would have done without Fearless. I don’t know what my mom would have done. You have made SUCH a huge impact on my life (I also would not have overcome my biggest heartbreak of losing the man I thought I was supposed to be with for the rest of my life) without your music. It may sound cheesy, and it may be over stated, but your music has truly helped shape me into the person I am today. I will forever hold Fearless, you, as well as the rest of your incredible albums close to my heart. Thank you. Xx

#taylor swift #fearless #get this to taylor #help me get this to taylor #open letter

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estelagellison9 · 7 years ago

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Ecstasy Addiction in College

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Ecstasy Addiction in College

Ecstasy has become one of the most popular recreational drugs used by college students, especially in the club and rave scene. Ecstasy is a stimulant that causes euphoric feelings and hallucinations. Although use of the drug among teens and youth has been prevalent for decades, the use of ecstasy among college students has become even bigger with rise of festival and rave culture. Addiction Center reported, “emergency room visits have increased more than 1200 percent since ecstasy became the ‘club drug’ of choice at all-night raves.” The risk of ecstasy use among college students can be even more harmful than that of their older counterparts’ due to the fact that their brains are not fully developed and are more susceptible to altered brain chemistry and addiction. The United Nations’ Office on Drugs and Crime estimates that there are about 9 million ecstasy users—mostly teens and young adults—worldwide.

What is ecstasy?

Ecstasy is an illegal and recreational drug also known as “E,” “X,” and “Molly.” Originally created in 1912 in the form of “MDMA,” the drug was used by the US Army for psychological warfare in the 1950’s and by therapists as a psychotherapy tool in the 1960’s. By the 1980’s the drug had been deemed illegal due to safety concerns, but had resurfaced as an extremely popular club drug. Now, although the name and chemical makeup of the drug has changed, the recreational use of MDMA has, again, begun to rise, especially among teens and young adults. While earlier versions of ecstasy, made more purely of MDMA, had many health and safety side effects, current production of ecstasy is even more harmful to users. The ecstasy that is commonly sold today contains little to no MDMA at all and, instead, contains a cocktail of licit and illicit substances such as cocaine, LSD, heroin, methamphetamine, caffeine, amphetamine, and even rat poison and dog deworming products.

Although “ecstasy” and “molly” are often considered one in the same, the two recreational substances, in fact, have many differences. While MDMA and ecstasy have been around since the 1900’s, molly came about in the early 2000’s as a means of rebranding the earlier form. One of the main differences between ecstasy and molly is the form in which they are commonly taken. While ecstasy is often taken in pill form, molly is consumed as a powder, often in a capsule. This is where the common misconception of molly being “purer” came about; because the pill form requires fillers to bind it together, many believe that molly is purer, although that is often not the case. The Wall Street Journal reports that only 13 percent of molly samples had traces of MDMA.

The way the two drugs are cut is often very different as well. While ecstasy is often cut with sugar, speed, para-methoxyamphetamine, methampetamines, and caffeine, molly is often cut with synthetic drugs such as bath salts, synthetic marijuana, and methylone. The effect of molly can also vary from MDMA and ecstasy.

What does molly do to you?

The effects of molly last between approximately three and six hours. The drug triggers the release of massive amounts of dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin in the brain, resulting in feelings of extreme euphoria, increased energy, and heightened levels of sexual arousal. The drug also produces increased perception of interpersonal connection.

The use of molly stimulates the central nervous system and can cause rapid heartbeat, blood vessel constriction, sweating, difficulty regulating body temperature, and high blood pressure. Occurrence of psychosis, seizures, and prolonged panic attacks are also commonly reported, along with a severe depression after the drug wears off.

Why do college students take ecstasy?

The popularity of the drug on college campuses is related to its ability to lower inhibitions and cause people to feel more connected to one another. The effects of ecstasy can cause party goers to stay up all night dancing, hooking up, and bonding. For these reasons, ecstasy is viewed as the ultimate party drug. Put simply, college students take the drug to feel good—too good, maybe.

What is MDMA depression?

Even moderate use of MDMA can result in feelings of depression for several days after taking the drug. These effects are more severe among frequent users of MDMA or those who take the drug in larger quantities. Feelings of hopelessness, irritability, anxiety, memory and attention problems, decreased appetite, and lack of interest in or enjoyment of sex are all symptoms of MDMA depression that may be experienced several days to a week after use.

Facts about ecstasy

The perception of risk among 18 year olds of ecstasy has been declining since the early 2000’s. Like other drugs of abuse, as perception of risk decreases, use increases among youth. Youth are particularly vulnerable to ecstasy abuse, along with other drugs, because the adolescent brain does not fully develop until the age of 26, on average. In the last few years, use of molly has gone up among youth and young adults, likely due to a number of high-profile musicians, including Kanye West, Jay-Z, and Miley Cyrus mentioning the drug in their song lyrics. It is estimated that 5% of college student have used some form of MDMA.

Ecstasy abuse statistics

The 2014 National Monitoring the Future Study found that college age students, 19 to 24 years of age, abuse ecstasy at approximately 5 to 6 percent of the population at large. This is a substantial increase from the early 1990’s. The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) reports that ecstasy-related emergency room visits increased between 2005 to 2011 among patients 21 years and under. There were 4,460 such visits in 2005, and that number more than doubled to 10,176 ER visits in 2011.

Is ecstasy addictive?

The jury is still out on this question; however, the chemical changes that prolonged ecstasy use can cause in the brain and body make it very difficult to lead a normal life. The extreme surges in serotonin—the neurotransmitter that regulates mood and happiness—caused by MDMA cause the brain to produce less of the chemical naturally while it simultaneously comes to expect more of it in order to feel good. Therefore, in the absence of the drug, frequent MDMA users experience unnaturally low mood and decreased sensations of joy from previously pleasurable activities.

Some studies have found that some MDMA users report experiencing symptoms of addiction, including withdrawal, tolerance, and loss of interest in formerly pleasurable activities. MDMA addiction would fall in the diagnostic category of Other Hallucinogen Disorders in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition (DSM V). Depending on the number of symptoms present in a twelve-month period, a mental health professional would classify the individual’s MDMA use disorder mild, moderate, or severe.

Is ecstasy an amphetamine?

Amphetamines are drugs that stimulate the central nervous system, leading to increased attention, focus, and energy. They are also used for weight loss, in some cases. Although the chemical structure of MDMA is quite similar to amphetamines, it contains a methylenedioxy group, which resembles the structure of mescaline, a hallucinogenic drug. This makes sense, as the drug produces both hallucinogenic and amphetamine-like effects.

Can you overdose on ecstasy?

Simply put, yes—you can overdose on ecstasy. More specifically, users can experience heart failure or irregularities related to the amphetamine properties of the drug. Additionally, because of the large amounts of serotonin released in the brain while using MDMA, serotonin syndrome is a condition that can arise, leading to death. Symptoms of serotonin syndrome include increased body temperature, sweats and chills, diarrhea, sweating, and dilated pupils. Finally, some ecstasy users experience seizures.

Molly tolerance

Because of its acute potency, molly users quickly build a tolerance to the drug. This means that the same amount of the drug no longer causes the same “high” and users must take larger quantities of the drug to achieve a similar effect. Unfortunately, more of the drug being ingested causes more damage to the body and greater likelihood and severity of adverse health consequences. Tolerance is a strong indication of a developing substance use disorder.

What does cross-addiction and cross-dependence mean?

Molly addiction frequently co-occurs with addiction to another licit or illicit drug, such as marijuana, alcohol, cocaine, heroin, etc. This is known as cross-addiction or cross-dependence. This can arise from MDMA users taking other drugs to overcome the withdrawal effects of molly. For example, marijuana can ease the depressive symptoms experienced in the days following ecstasy use.

Additionally, individuals who primarily use other drugs like alcohol and marijuana may use molly on occasion. However, there are real dangers associated with combining molly with other drugs, including prescribed medications.

Molly side effects

There are many uncomfortable side effects associated with molly use. These can include involuntary teeth clenching or grinding, which may wear away at the tooth enamel; psychological symptoms like anxiety, depression, irritability, and confusion; flu-like symptoms, including sweating, chills, and nausea; dizziness; dehydration; and more.

In addition to the physical effects, MDMA use can lead to a number of negative psychological and social consequences. Injury can occur related to operating a car or machinery under the influence of MDMA. Individuals under the influence of the drug may also be vulnerable to sexual assault or other types of bodily harm.

Long term effects of ecstasy addiction

Over time, ecstasy use produces a number of deleterious effects physically, emotionally, and mentally:

Prolonged MDMA use can lead to kidney failure, cardiovascular collapse, hemorrhaging, convulsions, and even death.

Damage to the brain can occur, permanently damaging thought and memory processes and degenerate nerve branches and endings. Psychosis can also occur with extensive use of the drug.

Parts of the brain that regulate emotion are permanently altered by MDMA, resulting in depression, anxiety, and irritability.

Ecstasy symptoms and signs of abuse

One study found that 43% of participants who used MDMA met the diagnostic criteria for a substance use disorder.

Some indications that someone might be abusing the drug include:

Neglecting work, school, and social commitments because of use.

Moving away from non-using friends and becoming closer, instead, with fellow users.

Compulsive use of the drugs in greater frequency or larger quantities than intended.

Increase in time spent using or obtaining the drug.

Ecstasy withdrawal symptoms

The severity of ecstasy withdrawal symptoms will vary depending on how long the individual has been using the drug before stopping its use. Withdrawal symptoms include fatigue, difficulty concentrating, anxiety, depression, memory difficulties or loss, learning impairments, deficits in reasoning or attention, confusion, disorientation, and more.

How to help an ecstasy addict

If someone you love is abusing ecstasy, do not stand by while his or her life falls apart. Intervening as soon as possible can prevent lasting damage, or even death. Many MDMA users are not educated about the drug’s dangers. Bringing this information to their attention, as well as options for treatment, can mean the difference between life and death.

Ecstasy addiction treatment for college students

For college students struggling with MDMA addiction, there are several options for treatment. In some cases, medically-monitored detox may be required to ensure the physical safety of the individual as they withdraw from MDMA and any other substances they are using. This is especially true if the individual has heart or seizure conditions.

A residential or outpatient treatment program for the first several weeks or months of recovery is advisable for individuals with ecstasy addictions. In these programs, the patient receives therapy, both group and one on one, in which they learn coping skills and other tools for maintaining abstinence from ecstasy and other drugs. A psychiatrist can also be helpful in assessing for other mental health conditions, like depression or anxiety, that may be caused or worsened by molly use and that can be addressed with antidepressants and other pharmacological therapies.

To find the right program for you or your loved on, visit our website. The Recover maintains a directory of local residential and outpatient treatment programs. Let us help you get started on the path to recovery.

from The Recover http://ift.tt/2p0J2r4

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therecoversite · 7 years ago

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Ecstasy Addiction in College

New Post has been published on https://www.therecover.com/college/ecstasy-addiction-college/

Ecstasy Addiction in College

What is ecstasy?

What does molly do to you?

Why do college students take ecstasy?

What is MDMA depression?

Facts about ecstasy

Ecstasy abuse statistics

Is ecstasy addictive?

Is ecstasy an amphetamine?

Can you overdose on ecstasy?

Molly tolerance

What does cross-addiction and cross-dependence mean?

Molly side effects

Long term effects of ecstasy addiction

Over time, ecstasy use produces a number of deleterious effects physically, emotionally, and mentally:

Prolonged MDMA use can lead to kidney failure, cardiovascular collapse, hemorrhaging, convulsions, and even death.

Damage to the brain can occur, permanently damaging thought and memory processes and degenerate nerve branches and endings. Psychosis can also occur with extensive use of the drug.

Parts of the brain that regulate emotion are permanently altered by MDMA, resulting in depression, anxiety, and irritability.

Ecstasy symptoms and signs of abuse

One study found that 43% of participants who used MDMA met the diagnostic criteria for a substance use disorder.

Some indications that someone might be abusing the drug include:

Neglecting work, school, and social commitments because of use.

Moving away from non-using friends and becoming closer, instead, with fellow users.

Compulsive use of the drugs in greater frequency or larger quantities than intended.

Increase in time spent using or obtaining the drug.

Ecstasy withdrawal symptoms

How to help an ecstasy addict

Ecstasy addiction treatment for college students

#Array

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jinxedncharmed · 7 years ago

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Back from a long weekend with the family! Look at this precious darling, my niece. She's the spitting image of her father and looks nothing like my sister or I, but that's ok. She's outrageously cute and smart. We celebrated her first birthday, which technically is tomorrow but close enough, eh? Also I clearly have no idea how to hold a baby. It was good to see her, and Mom and Sis. I hadn't been to their new place, which is nice with three monstrously large bedrooms. My Sister and BIL are lazy slobs, however, and so it is kept like a garbage dump, which is unfortunate. It's in a poorer neighborhood and because many of their neighbors are black, they call it a hood. "This is not a hood," I said, "these people are merely poor, like you. Come to DC and I will show you a fucking hood." My racist family. I'm the Mike to their Archie Bunkers. Of course, they do live in North Carolina, which is a disgusting state. I was so happy to return to the north where I belong. I got to leave work early in Friday thanks to a fortuitous water main break which I swear I had no part in. The drive was long and miserable; by the fourth hour my leg was screaming, and by the fifth my back was too. But it was worth it. Niece is a brilliant happy angel. She is walking quite well and we very happily played in the floor on Friday night. Saturday was taken up by the birthday party, which included many of BIL's white trash relatives. How white trash are they? Between the five of them, they did not have a complete set of teeth. The yard had two trucks on cinder blocks. Mountain Dew was all they would drink. BIL's grandma was only one year older than my mother; her first husband was murdered and all they recovered was one ear, the second husband was a convicted rapist ("But them girls [yes, plural] was lying"). Thankfully he's in prison and she did divorce him. So yeah, we got to get Niece the fuck away from those people. Niece received many gifts; we must be careful or she'll be spoiled. I see now how easy it is to raise a spoiled child; I'd move heaven and earth for her. She particularly liked a tiny pink piano and a massive kitchen set Mom got her (Me: "You're only re-enforcing harmful gender stereotypes." Mom: "You had a kitchen set and you loved it." Me: "Liar!"). She is very fond of music and toys that make noise; in her nursery she was happy to show me a little guitar, which had been a toy of my BIL's. The highlight for me, though, was seeing Mom interact with Niece. We fed her and bathed her and played, and Mom was incandescent with joy. She loves kids, and kids love her; she reminds me of Tim Allen in "The Santa Claus," how children are drawn to her and follow her around. It was wonderful to see her so happy. Mom has long wanted grandkids, the one thing I can never give her. I love being an aunt but have no desire for a child of my own, and frankly, it would be cruel to pass along my more genes. I would be a bad mother, but I will try to be a good aunt. It was wonderful to see my mom so happy. She deserves that happiness. So it was a good weekend, topped off by the incredibly fun Foo Fighters concert. I sang and danced and had a blast, and today my body pays for it. But Dave Grohl is always worth seeing. Now, thankfully, I am back home. It is good to be back in DC. I won't see them again until Christmas; Sis does Thanksgiving with BIL's family, so I'll see Mom but not her. I hope the next time I have to make the drive, the pain is less. I've got my laundry in the dryer, and I cleaned up all the cat shit (Charm has separation anxiety, I may board her at Christmas) and scrubbed myself in a long hot shower. I'll turn in early tonight, as I slept little. The weather here is gorgeous and promises to be for the rest of the week. Tomorrow I see my psychiatrist, who I don't like, and Thursday I am getting two tiny cavities filled (rescheduled from last week, when another patient had a seizure and badly upset the whole office. I don't want a dentist drilling me after he's gone through that). Friday I'm bringing breakfast for the office, which is something everyone takes turns doing. Now to start a new book. I'm still in my Queen's Thief madness and listened to "The King of Attolia" on my drive, but the TBR pile beckons. It never grows any smaller, no matter how much I read. What a great problem to have!

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usmccarter · 8 years ago

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June 8 2014

It is Sunday morning here in the Carter home. Daughter volunteered at a disabled/special needs baseball game on Saturday and well the rest of us were at home. We took the opportunity to literally do nothing. But that also means since nothing was done yesterday it has to be done today. Bad thing is this pale skin Irish girl will have to do some serious covering up when I go outside since the UV index is supposed to be high today. I have a garden to tend to. The bunny rabbits are taking over my broccoli plants which I think out of 6 or 7 plants I may have one that survives them. Maybe... Since our special needs son graduated high school last year we have had to make sure he is always doing something. We thought about a job. Some have mentioned maybe a Walmart greeter but the safety aspect was a bit too much. See he is easily approachable and doesn't understand that not everyone is his friend. Someone could approach him and tell him he needs to go with them and tell him that maybe one of us said to go with this person. He would go with them. They could offer him food he would take it. He just doesn't understand. We have raised him to be as ''normal'' as possible but for obvious reasons we can't always do the ''normal'' thing with him. We had considered him taking up some college classes but the local community college doesn't offer anyone that could assist him and make sure he was getting to his classes. He could easily get lost or walk out. Autistic children/adults has a tendency to wander. So making sure there are boundaries to keep them safe is a must. I have always had to make sure someone was with him. He has had jobs before (while in school) that he would walk away from so certain safety measures had to be put in place. It is often scary to wonder what would happen if these measures weren't in place.

As a single mother before I got married it always presented a bigger problem. Even now being married it is still one. We don't go anywhere without him. We can't leave him at home by himself. Just to go on a motorcycle ride with my husband is not easy because I have to make sure our daughter is able to watch him. With her getting ready to graduate high school and go off to college that presents an even bigger problem...no one else locally to watch him when we need it. I mean I have my mother and step father but they are like 2-3 hours away from me. I have friends here that is in the local special needs/special Olympics community but it is not quite the same. Since my best friend had to move to the land of hula dancing and contact ocean breezes it is a bit harder to just get a break. I am sure others that have a special needs/autistic child/adult know what I am referring to. There are some that are more high functioning and are able to stay by themselves without too much trouble but some others you always have to have someone there....always. So vacationing or just doing someone spontaneous by yourself or your spouse is not in my playbook. Just going to the grocery store or even to doctors appointments...which can be really awkward when you have no one else there to watch him. My biological father just does not understand at all. He doesn't understand what it actually takes to do something. Then people often wonder why majority of parents with a child with special needs are able to actually have a 9-5 job. I mean if I had a job that could pay me enough money to be able to pay someone to watch my child, one that has the ability to handle all of his medical needs, seizures, etc...and have money to make it cost effective...sure I would. But that would mean I would have to make at the least $25 an hour. Half of that would probably be for the person taking care of him. So next time you wonder why you see all these parents not working take all that into consideration. Taking care of a special needs child/adult is a 24 hour job. You aren't off. Even when you aren't with them you are always thinking like you are. It is funny because even my husband has learned to understand my thinking.

He is from Florida. His family is still there. The family has brought it up to my husband the possibility of moving back to Florida. Well ...even my husband figured out right now. That is just not possible. When you have legal issues in the way of moving out of the state and having to redo all of it....that affects your decision. Not only that...the weather. It makes it harder to control seizures in hotter more humid climates. Yes it is still hot and humid in NC...but it is not as hot and humid here than in Florida. I have to change the subject for a moment. Since my daughter is graduating here soon I noticed the awards (or lack there of) she was presented. It upsets me and my husband the amount of time, effort, heart, etc.. she has put in helping others, establishing Project Unify clubs for inclusion on local high schools...and all she get is an AVID cord. No A/B honor roll certificates (this high school doesn't participate in that) ...nothing. I have had several of the teachers and staff at her former school comment on my frustrations and said we all know what good she has done. I appreciate your words. I just hate that it isn't being recognized. She doesn't do all of it for the recognition. She doesn't miss days at school to have to double down on her school work to volunteer and see the smiles and dedication of those competing in the Special Olympics and Special Olympics Project Unify. She does it for the pure happiness and joy of watching them compete, feel included in something and does it because she knows what it has done for her brother. So I can't be upset for those that don't get the same enjoyment that we get. Too bad, it's there loss.

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#autism #autism spectrum disorder #compassion #dedication #family #father #friendship #fundraiser #inclusion #onslow county special olympics #pay it forward #project unify #special needs #special olympics #stress

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darth-salem-emperor-of-earth · 6 years ago

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Looooook at this! Look at this cute little scene between Lon’qu and Lavender (one of my Robins/Avatars) where he offers her his ring and name and she accepts. Man, this moment is so endearing and lovely I could melt! <3

An enormous thank you to @sophiecms for bringing this artwork of them to life! Your art and style is simply amazing, the colors are so vibrant and come together so wonderfully with the shading, and the details in their clothes and hair so spot on and elaborate! In short, everything is so gorgeous! :D

Bonus image (also done by @sophiecms):

(Heaven help me, these two are too friggin’ cute. XD)

#Fire Emblem: Awakening #FE13 #Lavender x Lon'qu #sophiecms #Lon'qu x Avatar #Lon'qu x Robin #Lonbin #*heart eyes*#*does a dance of joy and has a seizure of happiness*

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darth-salem-emperor-of-earth · 6 years ago

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TA-DA! Here is my cast of OCs from my ME RP: A Creature Without Fear (ACWF for short). This was possible thanks to the wonderful, talented, and hard working @jessicamarianadraws who agreed to create such a large display of characters. I cannot thank you enough, @jessicamarianadraws, for making this artwork a reality! The colors, their poses, and the overall portrayal are simply amazing, rich, and magnificent. You have such skills! :D <3 <3

From left to right: Savitr, Farion, Judith, Aqil, Radraste, and Bryn.

#Mass Effect #jessicamarianadraws #ACWF RP #ACWF #Savitr Noaldis #Farion Vandrium #Judith Jokinen #Aqil'Osher vas Cerberus #Radraste #Bryn Whelan #*does a dance of joy and has a seizure of happiness*

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darth-salem-emperor-of-earth · 7 years ago

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The memory crystal was the only technology left of her homeworld, of her race and people that Thanos hadn’t touched or destroyed. Before his death, her father had given it to her hide, so she would always remember her family and where she came from no matter how many years had passed. She smuggled the crystal tightly in her clothes and Thanos was never the wiser. All the endless days and nights of pain, despair, torment, and vicious combat made the universe seem bleak to her--until she touched the crystal and felt it hum with life, warm and soothing to the touch. And later in the night, when all was quiet and she could be alone and at peace, she would take out the crystal and watch those sweet, timeless recollections she shared with her father, her mother, her siblings, aunts, uncles, friends, and other long lines of relatives or allies sworn to her great, royal family of the Fey.

However, some memories were harder to watch than others, especially ones with Father, the mighty King Oberon. Prior to Thanos snatched her away from her loved ones and torched her world to the ground, her father’s face was the last sight she witnessed of her family. And his soft, tender words of love and encouragement were hard to hear, especially after countless years of death and staining her hands in blood, coerced and subjugated to be Thanos’s perfect faerie daughter. For a time, Iris stopped believing in some of her father’s statements and the so-called prophecy that was heralded at her birth. All she brought now was agony, annihilation, and death--not some distant golden age.

And yet the crystal always had a funny way of sneaking up on her, reminding her of her true heritage and the the call of freedom was still in reach. When her sister Gamora escaped Thanos’s control, Iris too made her getaway. She followed some past memories back to Earth, her former home away from home, when she was young, vivacious, and felt unstoppable. Iris knew better now.

When her feet touched the fertile, soft soil of the tranquil, lush forest, for a fleeting second, she almost believed she was home. She was at peace and safe from Thanos--for now. She would begin her life anew on Earth yet away from most populaces because hermitage suited her quite well. All the friends she knew on Earth were dead by now. Mortals’ lives were so brief and swift.

Gazing once more around her, Iris ruminated through her pouch until the crystal was in her hand. As she pulled it out, a motley array of colors exploded from the sun’s rays, all vibrant and illumination. Exhaling sharply, Iris softly commanded, “Show me my father at his final moments, before his death.”

His face immediately flickered on the hard surface, all dark haired and toned and still looked regal even when death was imminent. He sensed it and regardless, he managed to appear dignified and serene, even when he began to speak.

“Iris, no matter what happens or what the mad Titan does to you, remember who you are, my beloved daughter. You are Princess Iris, my heir, daughter of King Oberon and Queen Titania of the Fey Realm. Death will not stop our love for you and our separation does not change your destiny. You will ---”

She paused that memory, unwilling to hear more. He would mentioned about her ushering in a golden age but she no longer believed that was her fate. How could she accomplish such a feat, being the only faerie left in the entire universe?

Still, it was heavenly to hear Father’s voice again and see his visage once more and for that, a small smile graced Iris’s lips. She may no longer have any faith in the prophecy yet she would never forget who she truly was and where she came from. Watching memories of her father didn’t hurt as it did before. Maybe now on Earth, she would finally get some closure.

I wholly thank @rayeliann for this utterly gorgeous, colorful, and enchanting artwork of Iris, my Marvel OC. This scene of Iris blew my mind and went above and beyond both my imagination and expectations! It’s absolutely incredible that this artwork of her actually exists. *heart eyes* <3

So if you guys can snag a commission from her before she closes them, then do it!

#rayeliann #Marvel #Iris #OCs #Evening reblog #This little blurb on this scene wasn't suppose to go this long but somehow it did #*does a dance of joy and has a seizure of happiness*

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