#*cough* totally unbiased *cough*
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Also also. I think Xenoblade 2 is actually gonna make it into the sample for my study on sexualisation of female characters in videogames which I am very glad about. My supervisor wanted me to base my sample on best selling games and based on one list of 2017 games I can just barely squeeze Xenoblade 2 in there if I put Horizon Zero Dawn in the action-adventure category and not in the rpg one.
#totally unbiased#cough cough#it is totally reasonable tho#besides the gameplay i have seen from horizon reminds me more of botw than any rpg i ever played so i think listing it as action adventure#is more accurate anyway#also the genre categories are bullshit anyway considering how many hybrids and sub genres we have#but i had to narrow it down
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@laviesm mona baby.. you have to check what's written for jay..
enha boys + types of kisses
pairing. enhypen boys x gn!reader genre. hcs, fluff, some are kinda suggestive of you squint cw. semi proof read!
HEESEUNG ✢ a small fleeting kiss followed by a passionate one
reuniting with your boyfriend again over the summer was something you always looked forward too. the way he hugged you tightly as if he never wanted to let you go again always made your heart race. the innocent kisses that always turned into full on makeouts was something else you loved. they always seemed to make up for lost time, and heeseung was never able to let you go with a tiny peck.
“i missed yo-” heeseung barely let you speak in between kisses, nearly knocking the breath out of your lungs.
“trust me, i missed you way more.” he smirked, grabbing your face and pulling you into another heated kiss.
JAY ✢ a kiss followed by ones that trail down the jaw and neck
jay’s kisses were often so intoxicating, so when he started to detach from your lips and trail down to your neck— it always sent your mind into a frenzy. the kiss would start innocently at first, before jay pulled away with a small smirk and moved on to your jaw. the feeling of his lips trailing along your skin always made you shiver and jay lived for it.
“the boys are in their rooms.” you mumbled, trying to bite back a groan. jay obviously didn’t seem to care as he continued the assault on your neck.
“well then i guess you’re going to have to be quiet. that won’t be a problem, will it?” jay teased, resting his forehead against yours. oh yeah- you were a goner.
SUNGHOON ✢ tracing the person’s lips with their finger before titling their head up for a kiss
“you’re so pretty.” sunghoon mumbled , dragging his thumb across your bottom lip. you were rendered speechless, swallowing thickly as his gorgeous eyes bore into yours. sunghoon smiled at your nervousness, moving his hand to cup your chin.
“can you kiss me?” you muttered, not even realizing what you said until the words left your mouth. sunghoon chuckled, observing the awestruck look in your eyes. he granted your wish, leaning down to pull your bottom lip into his mouth.
JAKE ✢ pulling away from a kiss, whispering words of love against each others lips
it was late at night, rain roughly tapping against the window, and jake was distracting you from yet another movie. you wanted to scold him for not paying attention- but his kisses felt way to good to make him stop. so like always, you indulge in his neediness, playing with the ends of his hair as your tongues traces each others mouths. he suddenly pulled away, his mouth only centimeters from yours.
“you know i love you, right?” he whispered, causing you to smile.
“of course.” you replied, before giving him a chaste kiss.
“and you’re amazing and beautiful and perfect and all mine.” he added, his lips brushing against yours. he leaned in to kiss you again, not being able to get enough of how you felt against him.
“your even more gorgeous and perfect, jake. and i love you very much.” you rushed out before jake could kiss you again, you could feel his lips quirk up into a smile which was enough to make you forget any type of grudge you held against him for disrupting movie night again.
SUNOO ✢ one person pouting only to have it removed by a kiss from the other person
“how do you keep beating me? it’s not fair.” sunoo whined dramatically when he saw the wicked smile on your face. the two of you had been playing very intense games of super smash bros and it was safe to say that sunoo was not winning. you began to giggle, looking over at your boyfriend to see a pout on his face.
“oh don’t be too upset,” you cooed, quickly kissing his pout away. “i’ll make it up to-” sunoo tackled you to the ground before you could finish your sentence, kissing you harder than before. you immediately dropped your remote onto the ground before moving your hands to run through his hair. needless to say the two of you didn’t end up playing another round of the game.
JUNGWON ✢ a kiss that tastes of the dessert they were eating
you and jungwon had a craving for sweets one night and went out to a local cafe to get a mini cake for both of you to share. you two finished it quickly, licking your lips to savor the yummy treat.
“that was so good. thank you for paying my love.” you mumbled before leaning over to kiss him. jungwon began to kiss you back back before you pulled away abruptly.
“you taste like chocolate.” you giggled, watching as a small blush appeared on his face.
“mmm i wonder why…” jungwon sassed, before grabbing the back of your neck and pulling you in for another kiss.
RIKI ✢ a passionate kiss shared before having to part ways for a while
“why do you have to live so far away?” riki sighed against your hair as the two of you embraced. you were both at the airport, but you were the one going back home. long distance was frustrating, but you appreciated the times you did have with your boyfriend.
“i’ll try to come back as soon as i can.” you replied, looking up at him as tears streamed down your face. riki began to kiss them away before eventually moving down to your lips. you both always tried to share the longest kiss possible before parting, knowing that you won’t be in each others arms for a long time. riki tried to deepen the kiss even more but you pulled away, already feeling out of breath due to your sobbing earlier.
“i love you.” you said softly, placing a kiss on his cheek before turning around and walking towards security. riki mumbled out an ‘i love you’ as well but you didn’t turn around. riki understood why you never looked back one last time after parting. if you did and saw the tears that began to well up in his eyes— you would never leave.
#heart : enhypen.#jay's one got me on my knees like bro let me breathe#the worst part is that i can totally imagine him doing that and it makes me want to fall to the ground#this kind of writing is really not good for my mental health#and sunghoon.. jesus christ i'll never shut up about how beautiful and mesmerizing his eyes are#for real it makes me weak every time i watch them a little too long#so im willing to understand that reader spoke without thinking because they were so hypnotized#that look + his fingers on the lips... bro im melting like ice cream under a summer day sun#*cough* totally unbiased *cough*#heeseung's one is really cute tho#the desperate kiss when you're so happy to see someone again#that you can't do anything else but shower them with love#i can feel it. im jealous. kinda need that kind of scenario in my life im so touch deprived#jake's one is adorable too he's so comfort boy coded like#i'll give him my heart my soul my lungs without hesitation#he makes the whole world shine 🥰
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A Totally Unbiased* Review of Yugioh Decks I've Played
Welcome back to "Posts No One Asked For" with your host -- me! This may or may not be an attempt to get back into anything at all after a solid four weeks of grief beating me with a stick back into depression. *cough* Anyway...
*Disclaimer: I am not a pro in any sense of the word and I can openly admit some (if not all) of these decks could be better built -- especially since I've gotten better at it the longer I've played but finding the right cards decks later is a pain in Master Duel so I will probably never rebuild any of the older ones -- and that contributes. I don't play competitively so this is based entirely on what I, personally, thought of playing them. Also there is no such thing as an unbiased opinion anyway.
1.Red Dragon Archfiend: Okay, yes, the first deck I built was based on Jack's. I was brand new to playing so I wanted a deck I was at least sort of familiar with so I already knew a bit of what I was supposed to do, strategy-wise, so I could figure out the game itself. RDA and Stardust were in the same pack (I think? I went for both at any rate, but this was...years ago at this point) so I went that route and ended up with more RDA-oriented cards so that was the deck I built. I very quickly learned the appeal of a Power Deck strategy and why Jack loved it. Especially considering later support like the (currently banned) King Calamity evolution of RDA. Overall, super fun and easy to pick up combos. Rating lower than maybe it should be simply because I know I could build it better now (if I had the time and patience to dig up the right cards) but still plenty high because even poorly built it still functioned successfully. 8/10
2.Lightsworn+Chaos: Admittedly, I fell in love with this combo with a very old and cringe-y OC I made way back in the day. This was her deck, and I wanted to make it. Except that once I figured out the game, I realized the deck I had made for her originally was terrible, lol. Anyway, this one was far better (though still not great, considering). I've always loved Lightsworns and the risk that comes with milling your own deck. The problem here is, as with many older decks that main-deck high-level monsters, the chance of bricking your opening hand is decently high. In addition to main-decking high-level monsters, there are also two that can only be summoned when milled. So. Yeah. Great deck when you don't brick your opening hand, but there is a decent chance of it. Yet another deck that might have squeaked out a higher score if I took the time to rebuild it, but the cards are buried in my inventory and searching is difficult. 5/10
3.Fortune Ladies: Yeah, I swung right over to building Carly's deck. Can't remember exactly if this was the third deck I built or not, but it's some where in this area. I wanted to love it; I did. And, yes, this is -- again -- a deck that I could probably have built better and would now if I tried to rebuild it, however... It's just Not Good, from a playability stand point. When it works, it works great, but it rarely does. The "ATK being based on level" gimmick is neat in theory, but it results in a lot of low starting stats that make it difficult to keep monsters on the field long enough to benefit from it. You basically have to get lucky enough to cheat out Earth or Dark by alternate means because your lower-level gals aren't going to stick around long enough to use them as tributes (or to be able to deal damage themselves). Sorry, Carly; too unreliable. 2/10
4.Ice Barriers: Sounded fun -- that was the reasoning behind this deck. And it was! A lot of the effects are amazing, and its not a difficult deck to learn by any means. The only downer is that Trishula (9*) is Super Awkward to summon with the other monsters you have available. But then again... you have plenty of others to work with (including the 11* Trish retrain that is ironically easier to summon and that, if destroyed, special summons the original 9*), so it's not all bad by any means. I may not play this one much these days, but it was fun while it lasted. 7/10
5.Weather Painters: The art is so gorgeous on these. Unfortunately, I could never get a handle on them. I blame that a lot on how Master Duel proc's effects, in that it's not always clear what effect it's asking if you want to use. Considering how many effects proc at different times and in different circumstances... its a lot to keep track of, especially when the deck is entirely new to you. So, in trying to learn it, I was constantly using effects I did not want to use because I didn't know what effect the game was asking if I wanted to use. It might be a great, really fun deck, but I will probably never know it. 2/10
6.Time Thieves: The only Xyz deck I have ever and probably will ever build. I hated the Xyz tutorial so much that I swore I would never use them. I only built this deck because I liked the art. It was... better than I expected. Like with the Weather Painters, however, the game has a habit of prompting you to use effects without a way of checking what those effects are before you decide. There are fewer with this deck than with the WPs, however, so it was easier to keep track of as I started to learn the deck, so it was less of an issue this time around. Still, not one I revisit often, though it was interesting to experiment with briefly. 6/10
7.Aroma: Favorite deck to play, hands down. I was overjoyed when I got on a few days ago to find Master Duel had finally added the new support at the beginning of the month (it only took...like, nine months 🙄). I dunno, man, there's just something about having 14k LP and gaining and completely shutting down your opponent because of the combination of those two things. It's a blast. I love it. 10/10
8.Blackwings: Yet another deck I wanted to love but... dang it, there's too much support. I started playing with just one copy of the structure deck which... not great. I knew that from the start but I wanted to get a feel for what cards I might want to use. Didn't work, really. There are so many options I just... never finished building it. What I played, I enjoyed, and the combos are wild. But it was just Too Much to figure out for this girl, haha. 5/10.
9.Dragunity: I wanted a new deck to learn, and at this point I'm starting to run out of synchro-based archetypes that interest me and this one looked interesting enough so I went for it. I still have not really gotten into it, months down the line. I've tried it out a fair bit, but dang it, this is the first deck I've built with synchro-tuners and that has bitten me in the butt more times than it has worked for my benefit, lol. It's a different strategy than I'm used to and I need to keep playing this one to get better at it, but I just. haven't. haha. Given that I've barely begun to learn this one, the rating is probably a little off (one way or the other) from what I would give it if I'd gotten it down, but.... 6/10
#yugioh#yugioh 5ds#yugioh master duel#master duel#(only tagging 5ds because i mostly play synchros haha)#(i would say its after midnight and i need to go to bed but i'm always tired these days ahahahaha#this was a nice distraction for a bit and i enjoyed it even if no one reads it so it was worth the time at any rate)
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Bound with Fire, Forged with Flames (Elucien Fic)
Summary // Masterlist // Previous Chapter // Next Chapter
A/N: Things are heating up... regency style. Just 2600 words of pure longing. It's amazing and I am obviously unbiased.
Chapter Five -- Pink Camellias
Word Count: 2620
Lucien
The two days following their library chat had passed in a blissful blur. Everything felt tinged with sunlight and clarity, as they now felt less inhibited around each other. Elain laughed easier and Lucien felt himself smiling brighter.
Although she had yet to find his arm to squeeze it during their frequent promenades and library visits, Lucien found himself growing deeply fond of her wittiness and constant teasing. She had even pulled a blush or two out of him; such as, when she had pointed out the tightness of his shirts– “You’re telling me that’s not on purpose? Please!” she had laughed.
Lucien quickly began to value her friendship more than any other relationship he had ever formed. She asked about his family, with big, genuine doe eyes, and he had found himself opening up to her about what it was like to grow up as the youngest son of a duke. He had carefully avoided any conversation that revealed too much of his family’s cruelty, although she seemed to gather he wasn’t much of a family man when she would gently place her hand atop his after he would feign a joke to change the subject.
Likewise, he had been learning a lot about her. It was a joy to hear tales about Feyre and what it was like to grow up around the absolute firecrackers that are Feyre and Nesta. Lucien had yet to tell her about how he really had met Feyre, but he felt confident that he would find the right time to explain the long and winding road that led to the drain of friendship he had with Tamlin. Besides, Elain seemed content with how he currently knew Feyre, and that was enough for him as he threw his head back laughing at yet another horror story about when Feyre had learned to shoot a bow.
“... And I swear she had never cried so hard than when she killed her first deer. It was so sad at the time, but in hindsight, it was a little funny. She felt so bad, my father had its head hung in the main hall to try and comfort her! Lucien, you should have seen the horror on her face when she walked into the room with my beaming father and realized the face of her worst nightmares was hanging on our mantle!”
That was another thing Lucien had grown used to over the past two days. Hearing his name on her lips had become his new religion, as he often prayed that he could say just the right thing to have her throwing her head back and groaning out, “Lucieeeeen”-- in a completely non-sexual way, of course. He did rather like how she got when she was jokingly cross with him. Always saying his name and squinting her eyes at him like he was in trouble before eventually breaking and having to laugh, another melodic sound.
Elain now comfortably called him by his given name, only ever adding a “Lord” for the sake of her father. Speak of the devil, he coughed loudly behind them, clearly not pleased at being the butt of Elain’s joke. Yes, they had not truly been out without a chaperone yet. Any time they ever had alone always appeared by chance and was always short-lived. Ever since Elain had grown more friendly around Lucien, her father had been even more diligent in trailing after them.
Sometimes he swore he could see Elain looking at Lucien with heat behind her eyes and he couldn’t stop himself from subtly pushing his arm closer to her, silently begging for her to use their signal. However, even if she wanted to, there was never a time. On the third day, as his restlessness truly began to attack him down to his bones, Elain used their signal.
It was not at a time where he expected it, and he was so caught off guard that he was sure he had conjured up the feeling from his own lusting madness. But, there she was, looking up at him shyly, and yet he could see the excitement in her eyes. Oh shit.
While Lucien was totally game to begin to explore this side of their relationship, the last place he had expected her to finally decide to signal him was as he was escorting them to another dinner with her father. They entered the dining room and Lucien struggled to see if he could make this work. I’ve seduced in worse places, surely.
Not ready to part with her, he trailed after her to her seat, shooing away the servant who snuck forward to pull out her chair, and instead did the task himself. Lucien was tempted to try his luck at sitting directly beside Elain, but her father shot him a warning gaze that had Lucien dejectedly making his way back to the other side of the table across from her.
Lucien sat down in his assigned seat and tried to ignore his own raging attraction to her that was only made worse by knowing she wanted him as badly as he currently wanted her. He squirmed in his seat, trying to get comfortable to no avail. As he sat down across from her, Lucien noticed she looked far too pleased with herself. With a start, Lucien realized she was smug. She liked that she had this effect on him. Even as she tried to mask her all-too-triumphant smirk, Lucien could see the mirth in her eyes. Two can play at that game.
While sweet and tiny Elain sat too far away from him for her to touch him, he was a tall man, blessed by the gods with abnormally long limbs(and appendages, he mind added gleefully). This meant he had no trouble extending his legs and letting his calf tuck itself between her own ankles. This lifted her leg slightly, allowing the fabric of his trousers to brush against her bare skin.
Lucien took far too much pleasure in the gasp he pulled from her by simply allowing their lower legs to touch, but he supposed that this brand of torture would be all new to her. Gods a man has probably never even touched her legs before, he thought, suppressing a groan. She passed the gasp off as a cough from choking on her food, but he noted that she was turning far too red for that explanation. Luckily, her father didn’t seem to think twice about it.
Lucien subtly extended his other leg to the other side of her ankles, effectively trapping her left leg between his two. Despite his years of experience, just knowing the effect he was having on her from this simple brush had him fighting his own arousal. Please let this dinner and my torture end soon.
It was then that Elain had the worst idea he had ever heard her conjure up. “Father, will you chaperone us on an evening walk through the gardens?”
Elain
Elain was burning. She had tried to control herself the past two days and she had been doing so well, but something about Lucien's evening wear and timid faithfulness to always show up at her door before dinner, hopefully requesting to escort her… it was too tempting.
She had given him their signal knowing full well he couldn’t really act on it at the dinner table, and she had thoroughly enjoyed watching him squirm. That is, up until she remembered his limbs were quite a bit longer than hers and he could, in fact, reach her under the table. The feel of his legs restraining hers underneath the table should not have felt so good, but it did. She needed the cool air. She needed to cool off outside, right now. But she wasn’t prepared to say good night to Lucien and that is how she ended up here, walking innocently beside him through her gardens while her father chaperoned.
Lucien had tried to keep their conversation going by asking about the plants as they passed them, but Elain was wholly and obviously distracted as most of her answers came out as one word and breathless. Lucien wasn’t totally unaffected though, as every time he would not-so-purposefully yet purposefully brush their pinkies together as their hands hung beside them, a light blush would reach his cheeks.
Elain couldn’t decide if the blush came from the brief touch or from remembering their deal, but it electrified her to think he could be so easily affected by her, just as she was by him. Elain was not so far above ton gossip to neglect the fact that Lucien had always been known as a rake–sleeping around and leaving a trail of women in his wake who would do anything to get back in his bed. This didn’t bother Elain as much as it should, especially when she thought of how one day very soon, her bed was the one he wouldn’t be leaving, ever.
The sun had continued to set throughout their walk, and Elain could see Lucien using that to his advantage as he leaned in closer to her, claiming he couldn’t see her in the dim light the rising of the moon had provided. She knew her father probably saw right through him, but he had yet to say anything about it, so Elain let herself enjoy the feeling of his warm breath brushing against her cheeks. He leaned in particularly close and dropped his voice to remind her, “I have not forgotten about our deal”. The right hand he had hung loosely beside her left one then stretched out and lightly squeezed her wrist. Once. Twice. Elain’s legs turned into absolute jelly. She needed a moment with Lucien, now, before she accidentally incinerated their lawn.
“Father,” she squeaked out suddenly, jolting away from Lucien. “Yes, Elain?” He jogged forward, concern etching his features, obviously assuming the worst from her random outburst.
“Look, it’s now warm enough for the lightning bugs to come out!” Elain smiled at her father and Lucien while pointing to a nearby bush now sprinkled with starlight. “Do you remember when I was little and you would bring me, Feyre, and Nesta out to catch the bugs in little jars? That way we could see them up close?”
Her father chuckled at the memory, “Oh yes, and I especially remember you three discovering that if you leave them too long or if you shake the jar too vigorously, you no longer have a lightning bug.”
Elain smiled sweetly at her father before finally enacting her plan, “Do you think you could go get a jar or two so Lucien and I can try to catch some? Please?”
Her father's eyes widened slightly and it took an amazing amount of self-control on her part to continue to feign being unsuspecting and blameless about the obvious dilemma her father now faced: either disappoint his daughter and make the situation awkward, or leave Elain alone with Lucien for the few minutes it would take him to get a jar. She held her father’s concerned stare, having a silent conversation with him to reassure him that she would be safe with Lucien. Go, she willed, he is good.
Giving in and setting a stern look upon Lucien, her father gruffly stated, “I will be back in just a second. Do not go far. I will be right back.” Her father drug out the last two words, ensuring Lucien caught the dual message.
“Thank you, Lord Archeron,” Lucien chirped. “I have never caught a lightning bug and I am very excited to experience this alongside you both.” Tone it down, Lucien, Elain wanted to shout. With one final warning glance, her father rounded the corner, leaving them alone at last.
In an instant, Lucien was on her, cupping her face between his gigantic hands and pressing his forehead against hers. “Is this okay?” he checked. Elain nodded before Lucien added, “Tell me, please tell me this is okay. Use your words. I have to be sure.”
“Lucien,” she sighed. “This is more than okay. Please…” Elain did not quite know what she was asking for, but he answered her anyways. In an effort to redeem their disastrous walk a few days before, Lucien leaned down further, once again nosing at her pulse. However, this time he went a step further, kissing her right where he could feel her heart sprinting wildly through her.
“Elain…” he sighed against her neck, and this time Elain did nothing to suppress the shudder and sigh that ran through her at the feeling. “You taste so sweet,” he continued kissing down her neck, licking along her pulse point on the way down. She realized then that he was the only thing keeping her up. Without his hands tenderly holding her face, she was sure her knees would have crumpled and dropped her to the ground. “You had me jealous of my own legs tonight,” he huffed out. “Jealous that they got to feel your legs and I didn’t. Gods, I just know you feel amazing everywhere.”
Logically, Elain knew most of what was exiting his mouth was lust-addled nonsense, but she couldn’t deny that the thought of his hands running over just her ankles was enough to make her whimper. He caught the whimper with a small nibble against her throat and they groaned in unison, completely lost in their hunger for one another. He hadn’t even kissed her and Elain was a complete puddle before him, fully ready for consummation. If this is how her sisters feel with their husbands, I now understand why they’re so loud, Elain thought as she bit back a moan at another nibble that attacked the spot just below her ear.
With a start, Lucien ripped himself away from her, stepping back a few paces and pretending to inspect the bushes. Standing dazed, Elain failed to understand his sudden change in demeanor until she heard the tell-tale signs of her father approaching them. Elain, quickly schooled her face into nonchalance as her father whipped around the corner as if trying to catch Lucien in the act.
Of course, all he found was two fools standing four feet away from one another, the man examining a bush and the woman staring blankly at a tree trunk, but he bought it for some reason. “One jar for you,” he said handing Elain a jar, “And one for you,” he plopped it into Lucien’s hands before giving them their space again.
“My lady, I must admit that I am completely in the dark about how to catch one of these little bugs. Would you show me how to do so with your expertise?” Lucien asked. Rolling her eyes at his poke about her "expertise", Elain approached him, all too happy to put one of her hands over his to hold the jar, and her other hand held his as they gripped the lid. She was pretty sure she heard her father cough behind them at their proximity, but how else was she to teach Lucien how to catch lightning bugs, if not incredibly hands-on?
She pulled his arms closer to her and demonstrated how to gently and swiftly put the lid on the jar in order to catch the bug while also keeping it alive. “And there you have it,” Elain explained once they had caught their first one together. Neither of them made a move to separate, despite a mission accomplished.
Instead, they stood there, their hands clutched together over the jar. Her very own Pandora’s box– filled only with a small, glowing light and hope.
A/N: Let me know what you think!
#elain archeron#elain#pro elucien#elucien fanfiction#elucien fic#elucien#lucien#lucien vanserra#lucien acotar
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oh i should’ve mentioned the song is called just a stranger! and yes mj is a classic. and i’ve heard good things about those shows. i always have a bunch of things i wanna watch but never do lol. but i do like stranger things. and i’ve been tryin to get into anime which ones do you like? also sorry for dipping for a few days, just been sorta silent on socials the last few days :)
omw to listen it. Bro stranger things has been on my watchlist for soooooo longgg but i don't wanna start now (cause yk exams), hopefully when i done with it i can watch all the seasons without any guilt, also same my watchlist is way too long💀 idk if I'll ever complete it in this life time. You don't have to apologise for dipping, i very much feel you on not wanting to contact people for a while so it's perfectly okay <3 hopefully you're doing well now. As for anime suggestions *cough totally unbiased opinion* the first two ones I'd like you to try are, jujutsu kaisen and boungou stray dogs (bsd has 3 seasons and the order of watching goes S1, S2, bsd: hitori ayumi, bsd: dead apple, S3, bsd: wan!)
#s4 of bsd is supposed to premier in 2023#also unwanted extra info lol: i left bsd midway through s3 just cause i did not wish for it to end💀#also i did not say much about jjk but i can promise it's one of the top shounen animes but FINALLY real badass female characters#also I'm curious are you a mutual 👀#the anonbhd#the nbhd anon
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Percy is good though!
I like him a lot
Him and his tsundere tendencies, how he's so direct and brash, but at the same time so sweet and caring, especially to the MC and he just cares a lot about things and wants to build a perfect kingdom and is mindful of his privilege and uses it to help those who aren't royalty
He's a good man with non-silly hair
Also he's pretty
And super cute when he gets mad
...But seriously, why is his Grand so important in the meta? Genuinely curious now
he is perfect. i am totally unbiased btw.
He's genuinely so mindful and it just, genuinely get to me so bad. he's also super self sacrificing and i think i just like. Completely lost my mind when i played BFAF and he lets himself get beaten up just to protect MC because he's never, ever, letting anyone lay their hands on his vassal, and i think i cried so hard during that whole fight i never recovered from it.
and his base FE is just, so damn touching when you take the time to look into it, with how he's basically reliving a really traumatic experience but he's with you, and he sees how things can be different. And the way he constantly challenges MC because their vision of helping others is foolish and unrealistic, only because at the end he smiles and "and this is exactly this type of fools i need to help me build my ideals". He's just so. so. *shoves fist in mouth and bites to stop screaming*.
and i love messy siblings dynamic so his relationship with his brothers was the cherry on cake for me.
and i do think that while his resentment against Lancelot is really annoying if you only read 4KoaFK, if you read his base FE things click in a way that is SO compelling to me. like, feeling shattered and betrayed by the fact for once you tried to be vulnerable with the person you trusted the most only to have him betray all of your ideals while brushing you off? The fact he can't overcome this hurt and it's why he lashes out? and how ultimately he learns to move forward and accept that Lancelot moved forward too and they can become friends again? just so so good to me i love this type of specific drama where this feeling of betrayal just make you mismanage the way you should handle other people.
Anyway *coughs*
His grand is incredible.
first in term of his weapons, that give you those skills:
basically just if you have his sword +4 similar weapons, you get to have your stats heavily multiplied in general, it's genuinely so good (and if you couple it with Michael's Axe, which boosts ATK depending on how many axes you have in your grid, you really have a perfect combo)
second, his kit:
Unworldly DMG is the highest type of damage you can get in the game, it's genuinely extremely powerful.
"Singed" is an unique Fire debuff that can be stacked up to 10, that basically inflict Burn damage to the enemy during the *whole raid*. It doesn't cooldown, and if Percival dies, the debuff stays on the enemy. The higher the level of Singed, the more the HP of the enemy is lowered. (Wilnas also has this debuff, so if you have the two of them in your party it will raise very quickly).
King's Blaze effect Greatly boosts Percival attack depending on his HP and gives bonus fire DMG.
First skill has high damage, debuff, raise Singed, and raise Percival's Charge bar. When Singed is on 5 or above, it activates twices, which means Percival charges more quickly
Second skill reduces the enemy's elemental DMG to 0 for a turn, and if the debuff lands, it freezes its diamonds charges for 3 turns.
Third skill is what actually breaks the game. It's a major attack + a big buff to the party + Supplemental damage + the party attack without taking a turn.
No CA gain on normal attacks means his unworldly attack take some time to charge, however, he deals triple attacks guarantee and amplify any attack he makes.
And when Singed is high enough, he deals 1000% DMG at *each end of turn* while debuffing the enemy significantly.
What it means basically is that Percival amplifies any attack, is constantly dealing very high hits (which is very handy in V2 raids since sometimes you need to stop omens that are like "hit 30 times" and with Percival guarantee triple attacks, attacking without a turn (so multiply by two), and activating another dmg at end turn, you can easily start to raise this number. is constantly buffing your party and debuffing the enemy has a special debuff the enemy can't remove that willa ct until the end of the raid
for example he's extremely handy in a Seofon's raid because with his buff, multiple attacks, and his unworldly CA, he can easily walk through the "deal 77,777,777 dmg" omen.
It's a bit complicated to explain i suppose if reading how those dmg manifests themselves is already confusing, but he genuinely gets very high in general.
And he has an excellent synergy with Wilnas (who also raises Singed)
SO YEAH it's a bit messy but he's genuinely so good.
just muah.
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Is Everything Fashionable?
It was just another regular August evening. I, as any other ordinary teen, was scrolling through Tiktok in a feeble attempt to cure my mind-numbing boredom, when, in a fortuitous twist, I stumbled across a video expounding the philosophical tenets of Dadaism, particularly its provocative assertion that “everything can be art.” I found myself intrigued upon hearing this rather controversial assertion. I thus couldn’t help but wonder if it is also applicable to fashion and if, in the grand scheme of things, everything can in reality be deemed fashionable?
As the illustrious Coco Chanel famously said, “Always take one thing off before leaving the house”, allegedly providing a simple but precise rule to achieve “fashionability”. However, if we look at it through the perspective of the dadaist movement, the ever so iconoclast, fashion shouldn’t be about adhering to rules and norms but rather about limitless self expression. Dadaism challenges conventions by embracing chaos, arbitrariness and absurdity as its artistic principles in order to create a completely new universe totally opposed to the grim reality of World War I. The name “Dada” itself is the perfect embodiment of this utter randomness they were so famous for as Tristan Tzara, writer within the milieu, famously arrived at the movement’s appellation through a rather haphazard process involving the frivolous selection of cutouts from a dictionary which coalesced to form the letters d-a-d-a. Evidently, this ordinary occurrence marked a seminal moment in art history where was set in stone the notion on how randomness and the absence of conventional meaning in a piece could yet yield profound artistic expression. This idea resurfaced in 1952 through piano player David Tudor’s public recital wherein he interpreted one of John Cage’s compositions. This work was remarkable for its peculiar structure, encompassing the mere act of opening and closing the piano lid precisely three times within a span of exactly 4 minutes and 33 seconds. Notably, the symphony did not emanate from Tudor’s virtuosic manipulation of the piano’s keys but rather from the ambient sound of respiration, coughing, hushed conversations and the gentle shuffle of feet upon the wooden floor. Astonishingly, the composition, seemingly bereft of form, remains entrenched in the annals of musical artistry. Hence, in consonance with the dadaist credo, art and self expression ought not to be defined by normative rules. Thus implying that everything can be art and omit such things as good or bad art forasmuch as the absence of rules to base off one’s unbiased judgment over a piece. Objectivity, in the modern world, seems then to have been replaced by subjectivity, as taste remains the only standing judging criteria.
This brings us to the crux of the matter: Can these principles be transposed onto the domain of fashion? And if so, may we assert with confidence that “everything is fashionable”?
On one hand, fashion has long been governed by a set of unspoken rules and norms, often perpetuated by fashion magazines, designers, and influencers. These rules dictate what is considered trendy, chic, or elegant, setting the standards for what people should wear to be deemed fashionable. However, on the other hand, fashion is also a realm where individuality and self-expression are celebrated. It is a canvas upon which people can paint their personalities, values, and even their dissent against the established norms. The dadaist assertion that "everything can be art" challenges us to rethink fashion in a similar light. If we take Dadaism's principles of chaos, arbitrariness, and absurdity as our guiding philosophy in fashion, we might arrive at a profound realization. Fashion could indeed be liberated from the constraints of convention, allowing individuals to embrace their uniqueness without fear of judgment. Consider the works of designers like Rei Kawakubo of Comme des Garçons or Vivienne Westwood, who have consistently challenged the status quo in the fashion industry. They have created garments that defy traditional notions of beauty, symmetry, and even wearability. These designers often blur the lines between fashion and art, pushing the boundaries of what clothing can represent. Furthermore, the rise of street fashion and the “weird girl aesthetic” has exemplified the Dadaist spirit in contemporary fashion. Fashion enthusiasts now mix and match styles, repurpose vintage items, and create outfits that reflect their personalities, often with no regard for the established norms of high fashion. This subversion of conventional fashion rules, often criticized by purists, can be seen as a modern interpretation of Dadaism in the realm of clothing. However, it's important to note that the idea of "everything is fashionable" does not imply that every fashion choice is universally appealing or successful. Just as Dadaism does not suggest that every random arrangement of objects is profound art, fashion can still be a matter of personal taste. What one person finds fashionable, another may not. The absence of normative rules in fashion means that judgments are based on individual subjectivity and context.
In conclusion, the philosophy of Dadaism, with its emphasis on randomness, chaos, and the rejection of established norms, can indeed be applied to the domain of fashion. The idea that "everything is fashionable" challenges us to embrace individuality, self-expression, and the inherent subjectivity of fashion. It encourages us to view clothing as a means of artistic expression, where creativity knows no bounds. While not every fashion choice will resonate with everyone, the absence of strict rules allows for a more diverse and inclusive fashion landscape, where personal style can flourish. So, in the grand scheme of things, we can assert with confidence that in the world of fashion, as in art, "everything can be fashionable," provided it speaks to the individual wearing it and the message they wish to convey.
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I watched The Yin-Yang Master: Dream of Eternity and I won't stop talking about it.
I didn't expect it to be so good and so gay. For real, I only watched it for Xu Kaicheng (more on that later) and Wang Duo (who I casually found looking for someone else, it’s destiny) and thought it was going to be another cheesy paint-by-numbers fantasy movie with cringe-y visual effects but it's sooo well-done and I actually care for all the characters?!
Boya is gay. There's no heterosexual explanation for the looks he gives Qingming (who is canonically bisexual, fight me). Also, Boya is a bottom. This, my friends, is the face of a bottom:
(he’s screaming ‘top me’ on the inside)
Back to Xu Kaicheng and slightly off-topic: everyone wants him to be Jun Wu in the TGCF drama but I think he fits Hua Cheng much better. May the gods of cdrama casting bless me.
XKC is amazingly hawt in the five minutes of screen time he gets as The Mad Painter (btw, is he the palace painter the Hair Demon was talking about?)
(abs... chest... lips... tattoos... *drooling*)
At times I wish this was a series instead. The fast, almost breakneck pace is good and leaves no room to be bored (unlike a certain other movie I watched the other day) but some characters could be a little more fleshed out, specially the shikigami (looking at you, Killing Stone, you're cute). On the downside, the budget would be spread through various episodes and we would get a giant snake on par with (or worse than) the Wen's dog from CQL. Better not then...
(beautiful soft baby, I want to pet)
The makeup and costumes... simply gorgeous. I have a weakness for accurate period makeup and the Princess hit all my sweet spots. Correct me if I'm wrong, the eyebrows and hair are much more Heian Period in Japan than anything Chinese (the story is based on a Japanese book after all). The lips look like Tang Dynasty, though. The butterfly shikigami sports a hime cut and the main characters' conical hats are also very Heian.
Ah, romance... I don't hate the straights this time, in fact I almost cried (the horror!) during the flashback scenes. The power of Wang Duo's abs, I guess. He is very hot and spends quite a lot of time shirtless. Thank you, Mr. Director.
Final rating: 9,9/10
#The Yin Yang Master Dream of Eternity#The Yin Yang Master#晴雅集#Qing Ya Ji#QYJ#Boya#Deng Lun#Qingming#Zhao Youting#Mark Chao#He Shouyue#Wang Duo#Xu Kaicheng#Netflix#cmovie#text#tw snake#totally unbiased movie review *cough cough*#spoilers
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Absolutely no one asked for this but here it is anyway: my review of The Boyz Reveal album
Ego
Okay I admit the first time listening to this I was kinda like eh but you know what? Upon listening to it further I realise I am a fool and a heathen and this song slaps. Rap line continue to just.. deck me in the face with their talent okay go off I guess.
Reveal
Oh boy this song is catchy. The part with Kevin & Q just before the chorus? Chef's kiss. Beautiful. Deserves an award in itself. Vocals? On point. Rap? On point. The bridge? So beautiful I give it another chef's kiss. One last thing, I'm really bad at recognising voices still but I think New is doing the backing vocals towards the end? So effortless and damn boy you slay.
Shake You Down
Okay I really like the beginning, idk it kinda sounds like a siren?? Another song I wasn't that fussed on at first listen but you know what? It's kinda catchy and it's growing on me and we all know those songs end up grabbing your heart pretty bad.
Scar
Okay. Okay. So.. Sunwoo main vocal 2k20?? Yes? Once again rap line goes way harder than they needed to, please let us live. I absolutely live for Q's voice in the chorus and whilst I love everyone's voices in this, I kinda wish I could have heard him sing that part more but that's just me. His voice in that part is just so gentle and perfect and the song is not that gentle but it works so well?? This song also made me realise that Juhaknyeon's voice is even better than I thought before. Poor Juyeon stans don't get much here tbh :/
Salty
A bit of a calmer song. I actually really love the vocals on this song.. I mean not that I don't love them on every other song here but hhhhhh the chorus. I don't know why but for some reason I get an older vibe from this?? Do I even make sense at this point it's like 4am. I also get summer road trip vibe like.. imagine listening to this whilst driving on a warm summer day. I think we have a new main vocal. Mwah big love.
Break Your Rules
Funky boys be funky. One of the softer songs on the album. The first half be like bam but this is like.. a hug. That didn't make any sense but sssh I know what I mean. The prechorus is mwah in itself but CANADA LINE??? Bruh it really hits different. Someone also tell my man that he really should stop coming for my heart like this. Listen to the song and you'll know what I mean.
Wings
Awwwww. A softer, more pure concept here. I love how calm this song is and how beautiful their voices sound here. Like... their voices are kinda breathy here and that absolutely works for this song. Standouts here for me are Q and Juhaknyeon. Just.. beautiful voices, I love. Also kinda get the older vibe from this song too??
Goodbye
Hhhhhh I knew this song would cut me deep. Just from the title alone I knew, and then the preview we got only confirmed it. And now the full thing. First thing, Younghoon & Sangyeon's harmonies. Yes. That is all, thank you. No words could possibly say how in love I am with the chorus. None. This song feels reminiscent and magical and... kinda Christmassy tbh. 12/10 needs to be on an OST.
Spring Snow
OST song part 2. Another Christmas vibe here but then again it is about snow so what did I really expect? I really hate to admit it but Hyunjae's voice in the chorus is so beautiful. I Will Not Discuss Sunwoo's Vocals. Eric did not have to go that hard on a ballad calm down boy. But yes, this whole song is beautiful and I thought this was going to be sad but it actually isn't! It's actually really sweet.
Overall thoughts
I think we have a new main vocal
Rap line always goes too hard
Vocals on point at all times
They're so flexible, they can go from grr to uwu so easily.. how?
I Do Not Know Which Song Is My Favourite
They deserve a million awards tbh
Stan The Boyz
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Today on this episode of "I promise I didn't disappear off the face of the earth I've just been busy and totally lacking creative energy (or brain cells, for that matter) it's terrible, but hello, I did a thing" - I present this:
The Little Deaths of the Pining Flowers
For the Hades Big Bang, in collaboration with kowaiyoukai (their beautiful illustration featured here).
Fandom: Hades Game Pairing: Zagreus/Thanatos Featuring: Pining, Off-Brand Hanahaki Summary: “Does it ever get easier?” Thanatos finally asked one day.
“No,” Achilles said, the gentle hush of his words like the breath of the breeze through meadow reeds, “But it does get easier to hide.”
Death cannot die. No blade can pierce him, no hand strong enough to steal a final breath from the powerful column of his throat, no disease potent enough to mar his flesh. Death, like Time, was fathomless and unending. So long as there was Life, there was Time to observe it and Death to spirit it away.
And so long as there was love, there was pining – and all of its little maladies that follow. Death knew of them, these maladies, these “little deaths” that come before the final breath. Some fleeting, some spanning decades. The gods, in all their brilliance, creativity and cruelty, created love. Love, the painful precipice between life and death. Knit tightly between the two so that from the depths of it might bloom a beautiful, wretched thing: pining flowers . Life sprung from the ashes of despair, fertilized in love and hope unrequited. In doing so, pain became love and love became pain, death and life a reflection of one another more intimate than the eternal dance of the sun and moon itself.
Thanatos had watched these slow, curdling little deaths before. Had watched them ferment into heavy, cloying things that stole the breath from mortals’ chests. Flowers making beautiful wreaths of their lungs, thick with life borne from a love so fierce it could suffocate. Thanatos had watched men and women alike grow frail with it, their bodies made into gardens as they coughed fragile bulbs and blooms from their lips. Thorns were always the worst: roses and the like. Lips turned red, and yet these mortals who simply loved and feared too much could not find it in themselves to cure their aching chests. Could not simply let go of that impossible love – or confess it – to end that prickling, weed-like pain.
He had heard, once, that the gods could fester such illnesses; though flowers could not create homes of their flesh as they did in mortals. Rather they instead bloomed from the excess of the wealth of their power made unstable by their want. Made helpless to the source of their own gifts. But Thanatos had never seen such a thing. Thanatos had never understood. Not until Zagreus left without so much as a word of warning. All at once, it was like the Underworld had been snuffed of some great light. There was no sun beneath the surface of the earth, and yet the darkness and chill felt suddenly so much sharper, keener, without the warmth of Zagreus’ smile. Everything darker, every mercy suddenly harder to reach for, every hope dashed across the rocks like the surf wrecking a ship to ruins against the coast.
Zagreus was gone. His home, his family, his friends – Thanatos – none of it had been enough to keep him here. Thanatos had not been enough.
When the next death bell tolled, Thanatos did something he never did: he hesitated. Struck suddenly frozen by the realization. He had not been enough. Of course, he hadn’t. Zagreus was born of the Underworld, but he was also born of the surface – of life and blood and all things that breathed . Of course, death and darkness had not been enough.
Of course, Thanatos had not been enough.
He slipped from the Underworld to collect the soul the death bells tolled for and as he did, he felt something slip deep into his chest. Some foreign, alien thing; so unfamiliar as to be written away as imagination. Like a seed splitting the soil and roosting beneath.
*:–☆–:*:–☆–:*:–☆–:*:–☆–:*:–☆–:*:–☆–:*
Thanatos did not know what was worse - trying to cast Zagreus from his mind, or being constantly reminded of the man every time the death bells tolled for him. For every toll, whether Thanatos went to him or not, was another failed escape attempt and the beginning of yet another. He knew Zagrues must think his plight for the surface cursed - it was he after all who kept experiencing the relentless grip of the river Styx - but it was Thanatos who felt truly cursed. For every escape attempt was another reminder that Zagrues desperately wished to be free of them: his home, his family, Thanatos.
But the bells tolled and tolled, singing a symphony that drew Thanatos a little nearer and a little nearer each time. Like the moon, he found himself in Zagreus’ orbit - at first not at all, then from a distance, and finally passing him by, feeling the warmth of Zagreus’ being shining upon him, lighting him up. Even now, lighting him up.
He watched from the edge of the clearing as Zagreus dodged the molten depths of Asphodel, his weapon of choice - this time Varatha no doubt to spite his father - cleaving through the various shades hellbent on keeping him here per Hades’ bidding. The prince was tired. Not yet strong enough to survive his fight with Megara and continue on at full strength. But it would come, Thanatos suddenly realized with the same casual understanding of fact as one might recognize that the lava around them was hot .
But he would not survive this run much longer. And unassisted, he might not even survive this chamber. With a weight growing in his chest, Thanatos realized he might witness Zagreus’ fall for himself this time. Not second hand through rumor or one of his brother’s reports or the tolling of the bells, but first hand with his own eyes.
Thanatos couldn’t have said what made him step forward to help - not because he didn’t know, but because he couldn’t admit it. He blocked all thought out, pursuing just one goal: I can’t watch Zag die...
All he knew was that when the death bells tolled his reveal from the shadows of death into the realm of awareness in which all could now see him, the sound caught Zagreus’ attention and time stopped for just a moment - giving Thanatos the luxury and agony of seeing first the surprise on the prince’s face, then the relief that followed. Relief, as though Zagreus had been waiting at some fathomless horizon for centuries, simply hoping for Thanatos to rise above its edge and greet him.
“Zag,” he growled - voice rough around a strange feeling in his throat. He couldn’t find it in himself to dig for any other words. He barely pried the man’s name out as it was. It was easy to hide that fact between a cleaving swing of his scythe, cutting the battlefield down into a group of straggling shades that were much more manageable between the two of them.
“Than,” Zagreus wheezed, the name cut short beneath another shade’s attack.
Zagreus sounded bad. Even with Thanatos’ help, this particular escape might not last much longer, Thanatos mused. He could hear the man’s breath. A thready, wheezing thing that slowly but surely worsened. Loud, almost in Thanatos’ ears, in his very chest and he could not take it. Not here. Not from Zagreus, who would have been safe and whole if he had simply stayed home. He ground his teeth, cleaving shades with a growing eracticism unbefitting of the quick, efficient stroke of Death. Felt every swing release a little of that anger and confusion into the depths of Asphodel and the flesh of its shades.
His gaze tore to Zagreus as the last shade fell, the fire-tongued soles of his feet simmering against the punishing stone floor of Asphodel as he leaned against his spear like a crutch and caught his breath. Those feet duller than they should have been. In that moment, Thanatos felt an urge to follow Zagreus to the end. If he saw the surface, would it slake his thirst of the unknown enough to satisfy him? To draw him back? It was a weak thought, one that made Thanatos bristle madly at himself. It was becoming increasingly obvious it had been a mistake to draw this near to Zagreus. Death was obviously not as strong - or as unbiased - as he thought he was.
Zagreus had just managed to turn to Thanatos with a smile and a thank you when that expression fell - like sunlight disappearing beneath a cloud - for Thanatos was gone, a bell moaning in his absence, and in his place: a centaur heart.
“Oh Than…” Zagreus murmured softly, eyes locked upon the heart.
Alone, Zagreus hobbled his way to the heart, stopping short of grabbing it when he saw something strange on the ground beneath its floating weight. Here - in the fiery grip of Asphodel - a single petal simmered on the ground, curling fraily against the heated stone. The prince grabbed it with shaking fingers, thumb brushing over petal’s delicate length. Red as blood, thin and reaching. Soft as velvet and utterly lost here in this world of fire and death.
How in the world had anything grown here, Zagreus wondered, as he slipped it into his tunic above his heart, red like his eye and his feet and so much of his namesake. Flush against his skin, as though it had belonged there all along.
*:–☆–:*:–☆–:*:–☆–:*:–☆–:*:–☆–:*:–☆–:*
Persephone walked amidst her garden as she often did, greeting the great flush of her gift upon the soil with gentle hands and a smiling heart. At her touch the foliage seemed to bloom all the brighter. As she neared, it appeared to lean toward her like a flower reaching for the sun, following it’s daily axis.
Everything was much the same. The trees, the bushes, the crops, the flowers. Everything, she realized, but one. A new bloom, there much without her design or intention. Slender stalks rising up from the ivy and shade of a nearby willow, unfurling into magnificent red tongues and curling petals.
“My, my, what have we here?” She mused, tender and kind as she greeted this new bloom, just as she would have an old and familiar friend.
A spider lily, she realized with raised brows. Here, in her garden. Slim fingers stroked the nearby bloom - only a few and yet startling all the same. She had not planted these. Had it been her heart that drew these lovely blooms? Her unrequited regrets beneath the simmering hurt of her past? The red spider lily - the final goodbye. A blossom said to guide the dead. No, this wasn’t hers. It had been too long, the scar of that time too old, for it to have suddenly appeared by her doing.
Strange, to say hello to the final goodbye here amongst her carefully tended garden. She watched it shiver in the spring breeze, frail somehow in its little wind-drawn dance. With a frown, she felt something heavy stir within her heart. A longing and a worry.
Somewhere, she realized, someone was mourning. She watched a petal drift upon the wind and disappear. She wondered who the goodbye was for or if, like many things, it was even a goodbye at all…
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The first full blossom that appeared grew in the hair of a young man’s corpse. It had not been there when he arrived. It had not been placed by the loving hands of family or kin. It had not been until he reached for their soul that it grew, crimson petals splaying out like a corona - thick and full. There, among death and the dying, Life grew as Life often did: against all odds, rebellious and unapologetic.
He wondered if this human had been watched or favored by some god or goddess. It was easy enough, back then, to think nothing of it.
Easy to miss that it had not grown until he had thought - quite by accident - how similar the man’s hair had been to the prince’s.
*:–☆–:*:–☆–:*:–☆–:*:–☆–:*:–☆–:*:–☆–:*
Death’s chamber - moreso a place of enforced rest rather than necessary rest - was a cool, dark place carved out of the fabric of reality. A place made for him by the Night herself, speckled with twinkling starlight and furnished with all the trappings of comfort any entity might desire. It was not, however, a place of light or Life. There was no facsimile of sun, no warmth. It was a reflection of his very identity, and therefore the opposite of Life; and yet when he opened his eyes after a short, restive doze, it was to petals on his pillow. Not just petals individually, but a blossom. Stalkless, and yet full and lush. Large enough to fill his palm with curling petals, reaching like red tongues from its core. Death blinked and rose upright, staring down at the bloom.
The same bloom that had wreathed that corpse.
What might have been the favor of a god upon that human felt decidedly less possible now. Had it been a trick from Hypnos? From some other shade or god or goddess? But from the bloom, he could sense himself . As though it were a part of him as much as his room was a reflection of himself.
Which just… couldn’t be.
Death could not make Life .
He brushed the flower away with a faint, confused frown, only to turn to rise from his chaise and find more blooms. One atop a nearby book. Another on the floor, in a blanket, on the rug, beside a goblet. Flowers. Life. All grown here in the dark grip of Death.
This, he finally accepted, was a problem.
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It was definitely a problem.
Death did not know who’s idea of a sick joke this was, but he found the flowers blooming positively everywhere now - slight at first, but growing. It had begun as something almost ignorable. A blossom tucked in the crag of a stony wall. Red petals peeking out from the centerpiece of a table. Once, appearing what would have been a shade’s hair, were they alive.
But now they trailed him in obvious patches, suddenly crowning the heads of nearby shades and growing atop the slender rails of passing balconies. No one suspected him. It was a miracle, but it was hard to assume Death had any hand in Life. Yet still, the sudden growth of spider lilies among the courts of the dead was on everyone’s lips. Where were they coming from? Why had they appeared?
Was Persephone somehow responsible? How could she not be? Yet… she was not here.
It made the Lord of the Underworld more brittle and eruptious than before, a feat no one truly thought possible. It fostered an even greater divide between father and son as well, for the more the court wondered about how the flowers might be tied to Persephone, the more Zagreus asked after her. And the more he asked, the more the prince realized he needed to leave if he was ever to get answers.
The more he tried - and died - in the pursuit of being anywhere but among the dead, the more the flowers grew.
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Even knowing that every attempt took Zagreus further from him, Thanatos found he could not stop thinking of it - the attempts, Zagreus’ failures, the repeated destruction of his- His prince. That was a safe term, yes. His prince.
He laid awake in his rooms, crimson flowers rising like the depths of the river taking Zagreus all too often, and found he could not spare his mind of thinking of him. Zagreus bleeding, pale flesh bruised like soft fruit, yet so determined to be gone.
Just because he was no longer part of the equation of his prince’s happiness, could he truly continue to just watch this happen? Or perhaps true devotion, true service, was assisting even when it reduced his existence in the man’s life to irrelevance.
He’d help, he decided, because Zagreus was his prince, and Death was nothing if not faithful and reliable. No sooner had he decided it, a blossom appeared over his heart. Large and heavy, every petal weighted like stone, driving the breath from his lungs.
Yet he didn’t have the heart to move it.
*:–☆–:*:–☆–:*:–☆–:*:–☆–:*:–☆–:*:–☆–:*
The prince of the Underworld was special in many ways, no one could argue that except, perhaps, his father. And one such way was that when the bell of death tolled for Zagreus, it was rarely with the intention of taking him away. Thanatos arrived, his motives hidden beneath a well placed challenge of who can kill more shades here in the depths of Asphodel?
A game, just a game. No one could get hurt, if it was just a game. And goodbye would not hurt so much, if it was on Thanatos’ terms… Or so he hoped.
Death’s blade swung, cleaving shades in two. Souls upon souls, ushered back into the depths by his hands, just to spare one man the journey home. It was illogical. It went against his lord’s wishes. And yet, Thanatos knew there was no other option, not for him.
He could not be an instrument in caging Zagreus if it meant having him near would only make him unhappy. He cleaved men from their families, wives from their children, mortals from dreams left unspent and unfulfilled. Here, he had a choice.
Now, he wanted to see someone grow.
“That was something, Than,” Zagreus said as the last shade fell, wiping his sweaty brow with the back of a one bloody hand - making the mess on his face worse. Yet it did nothing to diminish the sheer Life of his smile as he turned to him. That smile - so full and unapologetic - was like the sun turning its face upon Thanatos, reaching his skin in a way it never had topside. Warm, making his belly flutter. Foolish and childish, he scolded himself. Made worse when that smile suddenly faded before Thanatos could answer and Zagreus said with a soft, perplexed frown, “What’s that?”
He followed the gaze of his prince to the ground at his feet - or rather below his feet - and there mere inches beneath the floating drape of his toes, a bed of flowers began to bloom. Spears of grass rising and charring in tandem to the merciless heat of Asphodel, and yet the flowers heartily remained untouched among the thicket of rising and dying green. Bloody red flowers, reaching up - not to Thanatos , but to Zagreus - as though he were the sun.
Lost in his grasping for explanations he simply didn’t have, all Thanatos could do was quickly retreat a few floating steps when Zagreus suddenly started forward and, using his blade as to help himself down with a grown, knelt to observe them better. He had one thick, tanned finger delicately beneath one of the lilies reaching tongues as his brows raised and he mused, “I’ve seen these around my father’s court but I didn’t ever imagine I’d see them out here . What could they possibly be?”
But when he looked up, Thanatos was gone. Gone, leaving nothing but a sudden crown of blooms in Zagreus’ hair to remember him by. Gone, because that touch - so delicate and gentle beneath the petals’ reach - had felt as though Zagreus had touched him.
And it hurt down to Thanatos’ very bones, stealing the very breath from his lungs, to know it was a touch he’d never feel for himself. Not when Zagreus wanted nothing more than to leave.
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It got worse. Much worse. He stopped visiting his brother after Hypnos once woke - bewildered - in practically a carpet of red blooms, right in plain sight of their lord. He made his reports as brief and efficient as possible after he once saw Zagreus dash by during one of them and the feeling that had arisen in his breast at the sight of him caused Cerberus - right at Hades’ side - to suddenly tilt each massive head as all three were suddenly crowned in thick, growing lilies. Hades had erupted, his gaze cast upon the shades, looking for a culprit. It was luck alone, or perhaps the heat of the god’s rage, that prevented those blooms from growing on him as well. But Achilles had seen.
With eyes so old, and so lonely, he had seen.
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“If I may be so bold, Master Death, I am here if ever you need a sympathetic ear,” Achilles once said, somehow managing to sneak up on him at his balcony. By the skin of his teeth, Thanatos managed not to startle visibly. But he could not hide the spider lily that was in his hands, the very cause that had left him so lost in thought as he had braced himself over the balcony that hung above the river - waiting, though he refused to admit it, for Zagreus’ return.
“There is nothing to be sympathetic for,” Thanatos forced himself to say simply, turning back to the river.
“There is always something to be sympathetic for,” Achilles had said in that soft way he said most things - so soft in death for a man so coated in blood in life - and came beside Thanatos to deposit something on the rail before he left with a gentle, “The offer stands, when you’re ready.”
Thanatos waited until the warrior’s quiet footsteps receded before he looked. There, upon the glittering marble of the balcony, was a tiny flower. Purple and plain, easy to hide.
A forget-me-not.
“Does it ever get easier?” Thanatos finally asked one day.
“No,” Achilles said, the gentle hush of his words like the breath of the breeze through meadow reeds, “But it does get easier to hide.”
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“Than, wait!”
The pleading urgency in those words were the only thing that stayed Thanatos’ retreat. More and more, Thanatos realized he could deny the prince nothing. His only hope was to remove himself before Zagreus could ask anything of him. Today, he failed.
He turned only so much as to peek at Zagreus from over one cloaked shoulder, waiting. It was much as he could offer without that telling pang marching through his heart and wreathing them all in flowers. But he was learning, at least, thanks to Achilles.
“Yes, Zag?”
“I… I know there’s a lot unsaid between us. A lot to make up for. I… I know,” Zagreus said, elegant, and yet stammering. Endearing in that earnest way of his, so much so that Thanatos could not prevent the single bloom of red that began to grow in a nearby crack in Elysium’s walls, hidden in plain sight by the moss and tiny fragile flowers already native to the place.
Zagreus’ words slipped to silence, broken only by the sound of glass settling gently atop a nearby grassy, broken pillar. Thanatos turned slowly to regard it. A bulbous bottle, bottom heavy and filled with glittering amber liquid: Nectar. His gaze turned from the bottle to Zagreus, a frown so easily slipping onto his face to hide behind as he said, “Really, Zagreus? Nectar? As though that suddenly fixes all that lies between us? This is, what… a parting gift? The goodbye you never bothered to give me?”
His scorn made Zagreus wilt - the soft sunshine of his demeanor fading as though behind thick clouds. In the craggy wall, the spider lily wilted somewhat, shivering delicately.
“No, of course not. I simply found this and thought of you. Think nothing of it,” Zagreus said, his tone carefully masked and distant now. Further from him, just as Thanatos had planned, and yet this climb to their eventual final goodbye felt hollow, forced. Forced, because Thanatos had forced it.
“I never do,” he said, the death bells tolling his retreat as the flowers he left behind - spotting the walls of that chamber Zagreus lingered in - mournfully wilted around him.
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“You are hurting, my son.”
Nyx’s voice was always a balm to him. Gentle and cool, like twinkling starlight. Not too harsh, not too loud, as living things were. Cold and distant, like himself, because he had been carved from her.
“I am fine,” he longed to say - but when had he ever been able to lie to her. But he couldn’t admit it, either. He merely looked away, hiding his grief behind sideways looks and long lashes. She reached for him. Her hands chill and welcome against the stony arch of his jaw and cheeks. Nyx’s thumb ran a smooth line over his cheeks, her face still and poignant, but her eyes telling.
“Just because you are Death, does not mean you cannot host Life within your heart, dear one. None of us are spared from feeling. It is perhaps the strongest force on this world - the bit of Life that nothing can wring out.”
“I do not wish to feel it, when it changes nothing,” Thanatos croaked, furious as his lashes grew misty without his consent. He had accepted what was to come, damn it, so why did the grief still feel so smothering?
“Grief changes nothing,” Nyx nodded solemnly, “But… It lets us know that if something can be changed, it is worth trying to change it.”
Thanatos leaned his jaw into the cup of her hands with a conflicted little frown.
“And if that change is not good for everyone?”
Realization bloomed in Nyx’s face like the flowers he could not prevent from growing to crown her starry head.
“Ah,” she said softly. “I see… Sometimes love is letting go…”
He wilted in her hands. A final confirmation, until her fingers went to pinch his chin lovingly and draw his gaze up to hers. Her eyes long and fathomless like the night sky, twinkling and watching.
“But usually... love is asking first, before those pains that go unsaid smother you both.”
Her pale hands rose to pick a red-tongued blossom from the crown that had grown in her hair and placed it delicately in the bowl she made of his hands; as though it were a baby bird. It glittered with fresh dew, with the tears he couldn’t quite stop from falling. Not here, in the safety of his mother’s arms. His tears were always safe in the cloak of night.
“Spider Lilies… It is said they grow at the site of final goodbyes,” Nyx intoned gently, “Others say they help Death guide spirits that have just passed into new lives.”
“The death of the past,” Thanatos said, each word carefully clinical and cold, as though distance could blunt their meaning.
She curled her own hands beneath the bowl of his and said, “They are also a symbol of rebirth, my child. Or perhaps more importantly, they are an opportunity, as everything is.”
Thanatos frowned lightly, his gaze rising to meet hers once more.
“I don’t understand.”
Nyx smiled a soft, tiny smile - as bright as any moonlight - and leaned forward to kiss his forehead tenderly, lips brushing against his skin as she spoke onto him, “Life, and all its decisions, are merely a matter of perspective, my son. It is not too late to change yours.”
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Before, it felt naive to hope. Hope was a foolish, mortal feeling; Thanatos knew better. Hope always faded in Death, so how could Death ever possibly foster it? And yet, his mother had never once lied to him. Beneath the light of her moon and her stars, all was made plain.
So when he tolled the bells to go to him, Thanatos allowed himself to look at Zagreus the way he had not allowed himself to before. With hope.
Zagreus had grown. As they faced off in the halls of Elysium in a quest to one up the other in battle, Thanatos found himself willingly distracted by the developed grace in Zagreus’ fighting. His posture had changed. He no longer zipped blindly across the field in a rage, trying to win by brute force. He was calm, calculated. He had changed.
Zagreus marked every trap in his mind. Every swing of his blade - new, now, one he had unlocked and partnered with - brought the shades of the underworld to heel. He marched them where he wanted them, whether that was to a swift death beneath his swing or onto a trap. He fought with a tactician’s coolness. He no longer wasted his energy. He no longer showed up to these battles covered in foreboding wounds.
He was growing. Getting closer to his goal. Which meant Thanatos, of course, was running out of time. And no one understood the gravity of the hourglass’ shifting sands quite like Death. Time, as always, was of the essence.
“Zagreus,” Thanatos said, hovering near the heart that he normally tended to simply leave behind as a parting gesture ever since Zagreus’ attempt to treat him to a gift. It was obvious the prince had not been expecting him to stay, reaching as he had been immediately for whatever god’s boon had been promised in this chamber. But the moment the prince heard his voice, the man had all but sprinted to him, and the eager warmth that had inspired in his chest caused a red blossom to bloom at Zagreus’ feet when finally he stopped before him.
“Than? I wasn’t expecting you to stay,” Zagreus said, all eagerness. Always eagerness to move on - to the world above, to a world beyond their fight.
“I wasn’t either,” Thanatos agreed, overwhelmed by the discomfort that immediately began to rise in him. He had known it would come. It had fueled many of this retreats. But nothing would ever change, if he continued to allow it to smother him. He just had hoped knowing that would make it easier , somehow. Yet he felt he could barely breathe, let alone cherrypick the words he wanted. Silence hung between them. Flowers pebbled the ground that separated them. But patiently, Zagreus simply waited. As though time were no burden to him. As though the hourglass of fate was not an enemy, but a friend.
“I know you intend to go to the world above,” Thanatos said, searching desperately for the words and finding every single one lacking. “I… I know you intend to stay there. You need answers, I know that… But before you do, I just wanted to say… She abandoned you, Zagreus. But we never have. We are your family, if you ask me. I won’t stop you from going, but… I just felt it needed to be said.”
“Than,” Zagreus started slowly, and Thanatos waited for the blow: you are not my family. You are not important. You are my past. This is not my home.
He had told himself to hear Zagreus out. He had told himself that this closure - however painful - would make everything easier. Clearer. Yet faced with this final stroke of fate, he found he couldn’t bear to hear it. Before Zagreus could collect his thoughts, Thanatos placed a crystal butterfly upon a broken stone pillar just as Zagreus had once done and said in a quick murmur, “Let it never be said that I don’t repay my debts,” before he left, like a coward.
Death, cowed by the thought of love spurned. Or perhaps, cowed by the thought of living. His offered keepsake framed in a lush bloom of red spider lilies, kept company by Zagreus’ soft, regretful sigh in Thanatos’ absence.
“Oh, Than…”
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Zagreus made it topside. Thanatos could feel it in his bones, a soul that had forever been below the earth suddenly above - in his domain, among the fields of souls he was meant to reap. He felt him there, fragile after his fight with his father and yet soaring like an inferno with his victory.
Thanatos pulled down the bottle of Nectar he had kept for this moment. It had felt right to save it for this occasion, the gift a goodbye and yet also a salute to his prince’s victory. A victory he had helped the man achieve. He poured an ample glass, the liquid shimmering like a child of sunlight and starlight both, but as he rose the glass to toast Zagreus’ achievement, a soft and confused frown began to mar his lips.
Above, with every step and every second spent there, Thanatos felt that fire waning. The glass of nectar trembled lightly in his hand as his gaze became distant, his awareness fully above. Zagreus, stumbling through the world of Light and Life. Zagreus, reaching another soaring source of power - Persephone. Zagreus, waning. Zagreus, yearning, straining. Zagreus, breath stuttering.
Zagreus, dying.
The glass crashed to the ground without a hand to hold it, shattering, Nectar pooling.
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Dead, as the boy had been dead. Thanatos did not wish to go to him. Did not wish to see him dead, here, among the place his prince had so dearly dreamed about. Did not wish to see him still and pale as only mortals deserved to be. Zagreus was a being of light and power and determination. He could not bear to see him beaten down to nothingness, just a husk of flesh and nothing more. Not here. Not in his mother’s garden, so close to the answers he had sought for so long…
But to love was to suffer.
He went to him. Kneeled beside the prince, allowing his own body to touch the earth, unheeding of how it killed the very grass he touched. His fingers went to cup Zagreus’ face. To prepare him for the journey home again, and as he did, the man’s body became haloed in deep, crimson flowers. Sprouting, uncontrolled and thick. Thanatos could not stop them, could not be bothered to stop them. It was effort enough to see him like this, let alone hide his own weakness.
He had forgotten there were still eyes there to witness it.
“Thanatos,” Persephone said, appearing from around the corner of the house with a death shawl for her son and coins for his eyes. She froze, her eyes not on him or her son, but on the flowers that surrounded them.
“Oh Thanatos ,” he whispered thickly, brows twisted. Looking upon them mournfully - she, the woman who had abandoned her son and then somehow enticed him away from his family below.
“Don’t worry, I won’t touch your garden,” Thanatos said stonily, thinking she feared the spreading of the dead grass from his knees.
“Thanatos, wait--”
But they were gone, he and Zagreus both, leaving nothing but a patch of dead grass and the outline of her son in bloody, crimson flowers. The blossoms trembling in tandem with the spatterings of red that had begun to grow uncontrollably throughout her garden.
“It was you,” she whispered to no one. “They’re yours.”
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Once, of course, was not enough. There are still questions that need answering, and Zagreus has nothing but time to throw himself at the mercy of the gauntlet between the Underworld and the mortal realm above again and again and again. Every victory means only one thing: another tragic death so close to his goal above. And yet, Thanatos cannot help but assist him. Even if it means cradling that larger-than-life body suddenly made so small by death and escorting him back down below. Even if it means being the very vessel that takes his prince from his goal, he will help him get there once more, once more, once more.
The hourglass has been refilled, if only for a while more. If anyone can figure out a way to stay among the Living, it will be Zagreus. Zagreus, who did the unthinkable and escaped the underworld. Zagreus, who found the mother that had abandoned him. He’ll do it, Thanatos knows it just as keenly as he knows the last beat of a mortal’s fragile heart.
But he’ll gladly cherish every extra grain of sand in the hourglass he’s been given.
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“I’ve missed this,” Zagreus says after one of their dual bloodbaths in the halls of Elysium. This level of the Underworld is his favorite one to go to Zagreus in. It means their momentary glimmer of peace after the fight is flush with soft grass and pleasing greens and all the Life that Zagreus deserves. And perhaps, when Zagreus is gone, Thanatos can enjoy a sip of the river to forget. He never will, he knows. It’s selfish, foolhardy and probably impossible for someone like him. But sometimes, he likes to entertain the idea that he could forget, and be free of the blossoms that constantly remind him of what he cannot have.
Thanatos turns to him, taking his time to take in the lines that make up the nostalgic expression of Zagreus’ face as he catches his breath there, sitting among the white flowers of Elysium’s fields. White and nearly like his own.
“Missed what? We do this all the time, how could you have missed this?” Thanatos asked.
“Not the fight. This . Us,” Zagreus said. “This just reminds me of how we were before I began my escapes.”
“Simpler times,” Thanatos frowned, unable to swallow the bitterness that suddenly rose in his throat. “But you chose to complicate them, Zagreus.”
He understood why, now; but that didn’t mean he didn’t resent it in his weakest moments. He waited for Zagreus to defend himself. For that bitterness to rise in Thanatos to ruin the moment, as it often did. He’d flee, and he’d waste his precious remaining grains of sand - he could see it all already, unfolding, until Zagreus brought a halt to his spiraling thoughts as only he could.
“I don’t know why this has turned into picking who I love, Than. Wanting to find my mother doesn’t mean I love anyone else any less. Everyone acts as if I’m choosing my mother over everything and everyone else. Even you.”
“Are you not?” Thanatos asked, dreading the answer.
Yet Zagreus simply looked at him, red flowers blooming in his hair, and said, “If you’re asking me who I’d choose between you or my mother, Than, my answer is this: I never intended to settle for one at all.”
Thanatos blew out a frustrated breath even as his heart soared in a way he hadn’t thought Death’s heart could, trembling like a rabbit against his ribs.
“That’s naive to say, don’t you think, Zag?”
“Says who?”
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It’s all a matter of perspective, my child.
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One day, Zagreus went topside. Thanatos prepared to go to him, to collect him, but the moment never came. Death felt the prince’s heart begin to flatter as mortal hearts did, and yet the final throbbing beat never came. In fact, it stabilized. It stabilized and grew nearer. Nearer and nearer still, adrift on the river with his brother. Not just his brother, but another too. Life was flowing down the river to the Underworld.
The Queen was returning.
Thanatos leaned bonelessly back into his lounge, feeling shaky with stunned, overwhelming relief as spider lilies rose around him like a cushion because Zagreus was coming home with Persephone.
Zagreus was coming home of his own free will.
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Life in the Underworld improves. As though Persephone were a sun and the Underworld a withered garden without her, things steadily improved with her return. Cerberus pressed eagerly into the touch of her hand. The halls seemed brighter, warmer. Even Achilles seemed a little less sad, and Hades - oh Hades - it was as though he were steadily becoming a different man altogether. A softer man, gentled by her touch. His thorns shorn short, his rough and callous words turned to roses lush and hearty; though suddenly kind was a stretch to say, he was certainly safer to speak to now.
The court was alight with how Persephone’s presence was changing everything for the better. But all Thanatos could think was that none of this would have been possible if not for Zagreus, who had lassoed the sun herself and brought her back to them against all odds.
If Persephone was the sun, Zagreus was the lifeblood of this place.
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The hourglass had been halted. There was no beginning, no end, and once again Death was no longer shackled by the wasteful ticking of time. But the flowers did not lessen, did not disappear. They trailed after him, and though he had gotten better at hiding it, he knew that Persephone knew. Flowers were her children, after all; how could she not know?
“You should talk to him, Thanatos. If nothing else, Zagreus has taught me this: what you assume will happen is never definite,” she said to him one day, cradling a wayward spider lily that had suspiciously grown in her garden - startlingly white. He wondered when that had started or why.
“Perhaps I will. Thank you, my lady,” Thanatos said gently.
She smiled at him, her thumbs so gentle with the bloom’s petals, making the little flower shiver happily, and said, “I hope you do.”
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Thanatos had paced the length of his balcony many times now, each with a stumbling aborted attempt to head in the direction of Zagreus’ chambers. He tried to ignore the knowing weight of Achilles’ watchful gaze by the mirrors. Tried to ignore the thunderous fear of his heart or the way the lilies just kept blooming around him in fitful bursts.
Go to him , his heart said.
But what if you ruin everything , his mind howled, Now, when things are finally peaceful.
But is peace the same as happiness? His heart asked. Is that all you wanted? Could it be enough?
It certainly hurt less than being wrong, his mind said.
If that were true, then why are the flowers still blooming?
Little Deaths, the Pining Flowers. Could he truly be content, if they still found the soil of his heart so rich to bloom in?
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“Take it from a fool who waited,” Achilles said as a tiny purple blossom grew in the tuck of his hair behind his ear, “Nothing risked, nothing earned.”
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This time, when Thanatos went to Zagreus in the fields of Elysium, he cleaved the souls of the dead down in one impatient stroke - knowing that if he did not act fast, he would not act at all.
Zagreus let out a startled huff of a laugh, his hand son his hips as he turned to Thanatos with a confused, if amused, “Well that was hardly sporting, Than! Have you been going easy on me all this time?”
But that expression fell, muted and worried, when Zagreus finally caught sight of Thanatos’ face.
“Than?” He asked.
“Please, don’t--” Thanatos said, holding up a hand to halt the prince’s words, “Just… listen. I… I’ve been trying to figure out how to say this for some time, but the words elude me, even now.”
Zagreus brought his blade down into the grass and let it rest then, his full attention him upon Thanatos in a way so direct, so overwhelming, Thanatos felt that urge to run rise in him again.
It was the memory Achilles’ gaze - heavy and knowing - that held him fast. Sympathetic, envious and frustrated. Frustrated, because Zagreus was within reach, and Thanatos risked nothing.
He did not want to have eyes like Achilles had. He wanted to Live.
“I hate you, when you first left,” Thanatos blundered forward. “I thought you were done with me. That I wasn’t good enough. I didn’t blame you either. What could I offer you, that you couldn’t have up there? What’s Death to Life?”
“Than--”
“Please, Zag… Let me finish or I never will,” Thanatos whispered. “I hated you. Or I thought I did… but these… All of these?”
He held up a hand, a red lily immediately blooming at his call to hold between them.
“These are yours, Zagreus. All of them, every single one. Because I missed you. Because I could not stop thinking of you, worrying for you, wanting you.”
Zagreus stilled, and something akin to paleness stole over his tanned flesh. Thanatos knew, then, he’d never have him. How could Life love Death? But he continued onward, if for nothing but closure. If for nothing but to say he risked it all, he tried.
“It’s childish, foolish, reckless even - but I… I’m utterly helpless, Zagreus. You’ve made me, made Death , helpless in want for you. In loving you, I…” his breath left him in a soft, rattling wheeze as finally he admitted - with the certainty that the sword cleaves flesh - “I love you, and… I’m glad you came home.”
He waited for the blow. Waited for the moment that would wring that last breath of hope from his lungs, and he wondered if this is what mortals felt like, waiting for him. For Death.
But he waited, and waited, and it never came. Zagreus merely stood dumbfounded, something wet growing on his sooty bottom lashes, before finally he stepped forward and did what Thanatos had always been too afraid to do.
He kissed him.
Perspective, his mother had said. He had thought she meant decisions, but it was so much more than that. This moment was a perspective he thought he’d never have - could never fathom . Life, warm and bright against his lips. Flowing through him in a circle, like a cycle that never ended, life and death and life and death. He closed his eyes and Zagreus reached up to bring him down, closer to the ground - to him - and wound gentle fingers into silver hair.
Around them, flowers bloomed in the hall of Elysium - blood and bone, red and white, cascading in a sheet to cover the chamber around them. Pushing out and out and out until nothing was left but the Spider Lilies singing brilliantly in the breeze around them. Zagreus drew Thanatos down like an anchor, floating feet brushing finally against petal softness, but nothing wilted from his touch. It was as though those flowers had always been waiting for both of them, every petal glimmering and shining now that the cycle of Life and Death had finally been made whole.
“I love you,” Zagreus said between desperate presses of chaste lips, speaking against Thanatos’ surprised mouth as though the words might possess them both, “And I’m so grateful you waited for me.”
Without Life, Death does not exist. Without Death, Life is not Life at all. For one is needed for the other to exist. Otherwise, there is Nothing.
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Zagreus had hidden all of his blooms in his chamber, of all things, knowing that no one went there. Not even Dusa, who was not allowed to clean Hades’ “ungrateful mongrel of a son”’s room. So there, they had remained safely hidden. Bone white blooms, ivory tongues drooping in such familiar ways to the crimson petals that followed Thanatos everywhere.
“Why did you never say?” Thanatos asked one day, as they lay side by side in a carpet of their flowers, fingers entwined together, nearly nose to nose.
“I did not want to frighten you away,” Zagreus laughed.
“And how did you prevent them from growing on me? I can’t stop the blasted things from appearing everywhere?” Thanatos asked.
Zagreus laughed again and repeated, “Because I did not want to frighten you away.”
Thanatos turned to him, arm braced so he could hover over Zagreus face with a gentle smile.
“And now that I am still here?” He asked warmly.
Zagreus reached up to brush a lock of silvery hair behind Thanatos’ ear, held back with a white lily to keep it in place, and said, “I’m glad that I was wrong.”
Thanatos smiled as red lilies bloomed to frame his prince’s head in a crown. Thick and regal, as he deserved. His mark upon the man. His prince, his love. It stirred a primal satisfaction deep in his belly as he leaned down to kiss Zagreus and say, “I’m glad we both were wrong.”
So they were reborn, there in a bed of white and red spider lilies - flowers that had guided them to new Life.
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Ok so the Outsiders SMP is a modded SMP based on Maze Runner but like it has its own story so like you can't really say "oh ya, this character is like this character from the books!". The stories are somewhat the same: trapped in a maze, big monster- ya know. (Don't wanna say too much about Maze Runner cause I don't wanna spoil it even though I know very little about it cause I never watched the movies)
One of the main differences is there is magic in this world (somewhat), with Demons, Angels and Fae existing. The ccs behind Outsiders have said the differences species don't have any like powers but Hell does exist so there has to be some magic to have a portal to Hell.
It's very much a lore heavy server even though a lot of bloopers and out of character moments happen often. The CCs don't really have a schedule for lore, they kinda just stream it whenever they want. Big lore streams tend to have most of them and are planned ahead, with a announcement sent out on their Twitter like a week ahead, while smaller lore tends to be only a few of them and is announced maybe a few days in advance.
If you do ever wanna watch it, Loudly, or any fellow Loudly followers, Owen has cut down versions of the streams on his YT (OwenjuiceTV), and he has one of the most up-to-date series on it. Graecie_, Bekyamon and Squidney also have episodes on their YT, but aren't as up-to-date as Owen's is. I will warn you though, I totaled up the time it would take to watch of the episodes he has up so far, and it would take 10 hours, 11 minutes and 46 seconds to watch all of them if you took no breaks.
So thats a bit about the series itself, but now I am going to talk about some of the characters cause I can. I really love most of the characters, you can sympathize for them and most of their actions can be explained. Some of their actions can't and those are the ones you will see most people hate. Sometimes characters say stupid things and I'm like, I love you a lot but please shut your mouth, you are so wrong or aren't taking information into account (*cough cough* c!Ori *cough cough*).
Don't get me wrong though, they're all really well written characters and you hate them because you understand their motives, not cause they aren't written well. This is what I feel about c!Oeca(he/him), I hate him a lot but he's written well and I (kinda) understand what his motives are. He's just a little- annoying, let's say, at times.
Talking about characters I like, I am unreasonable attached to c!Kyle(he/him) for some reason even though hes only done 2 lore streams. I know so little about him and met him very recently, but if something happened to him, I would cry. I don't know why I am so attached and invested in him, I just am. I am also unreasonable attached to c!Sillvia, c!Apo and c!Krow, but at least I know why I am attached to them. c!Sillvia(they/them) because they are the only one with common sense, c!Apo(he/they) just cause he's a sympathetic character and you feel bad for them, c!Krow(it/he) cause it has a lot of good points and sees things from an unbiased perspective most of the time, kinda not blinded by emotions. It also is just a funky little demon dude.
I love c!Magic(she/her), c!Graecie(she/her), c!Acho(he/they), and c!Owen(he/him) just cause they are so sweet, and just want the best for everyone, and are trying their best. They're trying to stay positive for everyone and I feel really bad for them and I just want them to have a good ending(and mostly everyone else). I also want this for c!Ori(he/they) but I also would shake them given the chance, please sir think about your actions and words for once.
Also I have so many theories about the world they're in, about The Maze, about why they're there, about their past. It leaves just enough out that you don't know quite what's happening and it's so good, it let's the fans make up their own theories about what's happening. It's just such a good series, man.
(Sorry this is so long, I just had a lot of thoughts. I think im gonna continue this another day so this isn't even longer)
-Raindrop
Yooooo, this all sounds so cool, and you wrote so much!!! /pos
Like that sounds like a banging concept and genuinely sounds very interesting, I can see myself putting it on one of these days. I also love how much you clearly love it like woahy look at this!! Look at you go!!
#ask box#💧 anon#long post#don't say sorry about writing a lot i love it and i love hearing all these new things#!!!!!
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revolution.
so..........hi.
time for a long, probably boring paragraph or fifty about revolution :D
firstly, match of the night,, it’s between two (and i’m totally unbiases guys). i’d have to say it’s between sammy, darby, & sting vs ahfo and mjf vs cm punk.
i’m not biases guys i swear,, those are just the matches i enjoyed the most. i was on the edge of my seat for both matches (once from excitement, once from fear) and they just happen to involve my faves SO WHAT.
but likeeeee, let me just discuss these two matches rq, then i’ll just discuss my other faves.
the tornado tag match...my besties slayed that’s all. and sting my man...mvp of the match bro. mans is older than my parents and they would simply d-word if they tried that table shot. mad respect for you broski. but sammy & darby tho :((( my fave unofficial besties :((( for those who don’t know (after this post you can probably tell though) they’re two of my faves and UGH i just love seeing them together :)
and then,, the dog collar match. *shivers from flashbacks* that match. it stressed me out. it hurt me. it made feel like i bleeding along with them. help. basically, i just took a lot of eMoTiOnAl DaMaGe from that match,, sigh. max...maxie....babe :( tonight wasn’t your night don’t let it eat you up. for those who don’t know (which is no one because i talk about 24/7), max is one of my faves (probably my number one fave tbh...) BUT cm punk was my fave growing up so....*cries* but but but!! to literally NO ONE’s surprise, BESTIE WARDLOW with the betrayal of the century. i’m...i’m hurt. not shocked, but very hurt. wardlow man you did me dirty but it’s okay i’ll still love you. but yeah. i’m just. i’m a mess.
anyway, ADAM VS ADAM *thunder rumbles in the distance* boy when i tell you this match had me reeling. i personally wanted adam to win :) but this match was so entertaining,, my adam of choice for the evening (and all evenings) was adam cole (bay bay) so i’m kinda bummed that my man didn’t win but it’s okay because i personally believe that someone else (*cough cough* maxwelljacobfriedman *cough cough*) should be the one to take the belt from hangman and finally get what they have deserved since they stepped foot in an aew ring (here’s me making this about max yet again) sigh. but yeah end of rant.
other great things from last night that made me smile :D
- the ladder match,, bestie i love a good ladder match. my pick to win was of course bestie wardlow who is now temporarily no longer my bestie (i need time to recover guys) but honestly i like all those boys so i really didn’t have too much of a preference about who won. congrats to the traitor wardlow i guess...
- the tag titles match....oh broskis when i tell you these are my three favorite teams in aew...another match that stressed me out :) i did end up picking jungle boy and his dinosaur bestie :D simply because i was wearing my four pillars shirt and i could never go against any of my pillar boys when i’m wearing their shirt (or when i’m not wearing their shirt) but man did everyone deliver. i love reDRagon guys. so much. i really thought they had it at the end but alas, i was mistaken. but the BUCKS bro. i love them too ugh this match was iconic.
- HOOK PPV DEBUT HOOK PPV DEBUT. my MAN. my absolute fave rookie of the year every year bro i love this man so much (y’all probably guessed that) and oh boy did he eat qt UP. ugh i’m proud. i’m so proud. he looked so lovely too. i’m in love guys.
- both women’s matches :) i love when women <3 i love everyone who was there but just like i do with every ppv event, i am once again asking where tf is my girl penelope ford. i miss her. i miss her and i want her back now. but britt though :))) i love my fave dentist <33 but the kiss in tay vs jade??? hello??? it was so unprovoked LMAO. but like no complaints here broskis we love to see the fruitiness.
fin.
(but fr tho i loved every match on this show,, i would give it a 10/10 thank you tony khan for once again showing me why i love professional wrestling)
#is anyone actually reading all this#if you read all of this i love you#aew revolution#all elite wrestling#aew
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Soooo jinkook married HAHHAHAH the double standard right. Another day to people reflet on their so confirmed theories :) twitter com/alittledewdrop/status/1366005844953817092?s=21
Honestly with everything we got between Winter Package and BE-hind Stories Interview/’Full’ Story, this has just been a wild one, especially since we basically went from Jungkook once more using the opportunity to verbalize and highlight just how much Namjoon means to him as person and their leader, what impact he had on him, to Jungkook as though completely casually calling Seokjin ‘yeobo’ during their BE-hind interview (which apparently BH left out of their subtitles but even I’m fairly certain I heard that word too. But of course we could all be completely wrong and he said something else but because of the suggestion of it being that word, our brain makes us hear it, power of suggestion and all that) before correcting himself.
(I added the translations from Papago just to like see if these accounts weren’t making things up because honestly occasionally I have trust issues with these Korean translations due to…reasons and…people. But it obviously checks out, and also looking at other comments and translations the only true difference for the ‘crush’ one for what JK said about Namjoon is some translating it in a platonic sense (as in JK fell for his style, how he was etc), others more in the romantic leaning sense.)
Looking at Winter Package alone there were so, so many cute interactions between Jungkook and Seokjin, truly, I adore their bond and the way they are with each other, how they make each other laugh and smile and are just so playful (all those scenes of them playing with the snow on the ski slope were so cute and entertaining! Seokjin basically rolling with JK in the snow did bring me back to vmin during BV4, even if those moments felt a little differently). And there was a lot of them together (*cough* which if we’d gotten even half of it for certain two members we’d never hear the end of it regarding their bf-ness). The photoshoot in the Christmas-y sweaters they did along with Namjoon and Hobi were so cute as well with JK leaning his head onto Seokjin’s shoulder. Very soft and lovely content. (Also you know me, I’m always a fan of pictures where Joon and Jin are together for totally unbiased reasons.)
Generally, I don’t know about you, but Winter Package this year was so nice? I mean, last years was great as well but this one just had this something that was just so soft and fun and calming/soothing while you were watching it? Am I even making any sense with those descriptors?
So, I guess, Namjinkook? I’m joking, of course, but truly JKs bond with both Seokjin and Namjoon is incredibly precious and both equally important for JK in different ways. Namjoon his first and last role model and boy crush, and Seokjin his younger and older brother rolled into one (or his yeobo, lol).
EDIT - I just realized I totally hijacked this question to gush about Winter Package, hope you don’t mind...at least I somewhat stayed on topic?
#answered ask#answered ask by admin 1#winter package 2021#BTS#Jungkook#Namjoon#Seokjin#bangtan sonyeondan#bts winter package 2021#bts winter package
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[reposting from my YouTube page]
Exciting news! It was announced a few days ago that Kaji Yuki will be starring in an Original Live-Action Drama Series slated for May 2020 -- based on the 2017 award-winning novel 『Piple』 by Harada Mariru.
YESSSS I've never really liked live-action drama by Japan but it's a different story Kaji is starring ⸍⚙̥ꇴ⚙̥⸌ (=totally unbiased)
The story is set in Year 2030, Kyoto -- a world in which marriage with A.I has been legalised. The plot will revolve around the protagonist, Tsumiki Kenichi -- a salary man in his 30s -- who marries a beautiful A.I. and their life together as "newlyweds" A.I. and human. Though, to borrow Kaji's words in the interview, "Ironically, the more he experiences life with an "A.I.", the more he begins to notice the "human" in himself."
Following the audiobook that was webcasted on ぴぷるちゃんねる (YouTube) from 2018-2019, Kaji Yuki reprises his role as Tsumiki Kenichi in the live-action drama series. This will mark Kaji's first lead starring in a live-action drama {series}.
►List of Episodes (audiobook) here
►►►Read the short comic featuring the behind-the-scenes of Kaji Yuki recording for the audiobook last year!
Now the biggest question is... who's going to play the A.I. wife? ♥(ノ´∀`) *coughs* Ayachi liked the tweet about this BUT I SWEAR I'm not going keep my expectations up *coughs* [See] Look forward to the on-air in May! I'd love to but I may or may not sub it!
P.S. Sorry I'm in a subbing slump :/ Lost motivation after my charger gave up on me and I lost the Kaji100 file I was working on... Welp, I’ll get to it sooner or later so I appreciate your patience (-||-)
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i still think that the romance between falcio and ethalia was forced as hell sigh i was so bored and mildly irritated reading about it. also lowkey shipped dariana and valiana HAHAH i really thought they had chemistry (more than dari and brasti anyway)
ANON UR SO RIGHT!!!
god i have so many feelings about these books and everything that happened in them skgjdkg
i love ethalia as a character (particularly in books 3 and 4, once she got more development beyond “love interest”), and i will admit the ending with her and falcio expecting a child who will be loved as FUCK is pretty sweet, but just... ugh. i still don’t really understand half of her story? what the fuck was that time where aline like... possessed her? why did she and falcio fall in love so quickly? admittedly, that last one was kind of addressed with the whole “hey maybe this wasn’t a great idea and we should just be friends” bit, but then they got back together and it was just all a pain. i wish the books had spent more time on falcio’s relationships with others, rather than constantly going back to his pitiful love life!
and HONESTLY darri and valiana deserved each other so much, and they made a lot more sense than brasti and darri. i can understand why they ended up together, and i don’t hate them together, but darri would definitely be better with valiana. like. how can sebastien de castell have darri spend a whole book calling valiana pretty bird and defending her and training her and then just......... put darri with brasti.
although, i could also accept an arrangement of darriana + brasti and valiana + chalmers. i know valiana and chalmers didn’t really interact much in canon, but they’re pretty similar in age and i just think it would be cute okay sdkghdfsk.
unrelated to what you said but i’m on a roll now and i’ve been desperate to talk abt these books for months: i’m so fucking glad kest wasn’t killed off. after aline died and i realised the author was actually willing to kill important characters (although not to the same extent as SOME OTHERS cough scott lynch cough), i was really worried that he’d die, because (a) he’s falcio’s best friend and one of, if not the, most important person in the world to him, and (b) he doesn’t really fit nicely into the series of romances within the group. like, brasti and darriana are an item, falcio and ethalia are an item, and kest is just there, still totally in love with falcio. romantically. i’m willing to die on this hill. i do wish he’d gotten more closure, in a way. like, sure he’s going to reform the honori and protect people (which i do like, because protection is kinda his whole thing tm and has been for a long time, and “Falcio, I know something of what it’s like to always be seeking purpose by following someone else around” DID very nearly make me cry at work), but i wish he’d had a chance to talk to falcio, one on one, about everything that’s happened and about his feelings. the closest they got to that was when he visited falcio while he was imprisoned, and that interaction did add like 10 years to my lifespan, but there was still relatively little acknowledgement of everything kest did for falcio, in my TOTALLY UNBIASED opinion.
#can u tell ive pent up all my feelings abt these books for like 3 months#i could have gone on for so much longer but. dskgjsdg im sorry anon i went off topic enough anyway#also thank u so so much for sending me the ask!!!!!!#the greatcoats#Anonymous
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Methamphetamine Testing in California
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