#* is basically my only saving grace. Hes the only person lately who seems to show care and interest unprompted | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

acefms · 1 year ago

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if you’re hearing LOSER by BECK playing, you have to know ACE MILLER (HE/HIM; CIS MALE) is near by! the 31 year old ANIMATOR has been in denver for, like, FIVE YEARS. they’re known to be quite AVOIDANT , but being AMIABLE seems to balance that out. or maybe it’s the fact that they resemble DREW STARKEY. personally, i’d love to know more about them seeing as how they’ve got those LATE NIGHT DRIVES TO NOWHERE, SMUDGED INK AND PAINT SPLATTERS, WEARING SUNGLASSES INSIDE TO HIDE A HANGOVER, NEVER WALKING PAST A DOG WITHOUT SAYING HI vibes. and maybe i’ll get my chance if i hang out around the DOWNTOWN DISTRICT long enough!

NAME: ace miller AGE: thirty-one and oh so dumb ... HOMETOWN: philadelphia, pennsylvania BIRTHDAY: october 19th ZODIAC: libra GENDER: male PRONOUNS: he/him SEXUALITY: bi bi bi ( slight male lean ) RELATIONSHIP STATUS: single OCCUPATION: animator for tv shows/comics/movies — is currently working on his own comic (name tbd)

[ tw: gambling, addiction, abandonment, depression. ]

• Ace grew up in south Philadelphia with his mother and father until the age of seven, when after years of a toxic relationship his father left and never came back. Ace struggled with the abandonment throughout his life, but was lucky enough to have his grandfather who was more of a parent to him than anyone else could ever be. Through his grandfather he discovered his love and talent for art, and began to use it as his form of escapism. It was his saving grace during his turbulent teenage years. He would definitely derailed had it not been for art and the worlds he made in the comfort of his room.

• His mother was loving in her own way during his childhood, but was always driven by materialistic possessions that she couldn’t afford. Her job as bartender just wouldn’t cut it, and she began to gamble. But after a few wins, she found herself hooked on the feeling and soon developed an addiction that grew out of control. Ace had to take on two jobs before he was finished with high school just to help pay off her debts which left him drained to the point that he struggled to keep up. He sank into deep depression and found it hard to get out.

• Despite this, she continued to try and live lavishly behind his back while he was on the verge of a mental breakdown due to how many things he had to juggle at once. By the time he graduated high school, he’d grown to resent her completely and she continued to put her addiction, and boyfriends, above him. They have no relationship at this present time and he has no current desire to ever see her again.

• Leaving for college ( which his grandfather had paid for ), he gained a dual-degree in graphic design and animation and built his way up in the business, taking a good few hits before finally landing his dream job working in film and tv, online content as well as comics. He genuinely loves his job and it’s probably the one aspect of his life he’s completely happy with. He is very creative and has several little worlds inside his head.

• He travelled for years, moving at least every six months before finally settling in Denver in attempt to build some kind of solid life, but so far the only part he’s got right is raising a a crazy pup named charlie and gaining a lifelong best friend in the form of his roommate theodore.

HEADCANNONS

• he never sleeps before 2am and never wakes before 10am. he will literally be acting like it’s the middle of the day in the middle of the night.

• he’s a terrible cook. he can heat things up and make basic stuff, but overall he’s kinda hopeless. someone help him.

• he drinks way too much coffee, and too often occasionally too much whiskey and beer. randomly likes to get high a few times a month if he needs a little help falling asleep. will be seen with sunglasses on constantly to hide who zombie-like/hungover he is.

• before he realized his mothers addiction he would often take trips with her as a young boy to vegas or places alike ( most of, but not all, his time was spent waiting for her in hotel rooms ) so he’s actually really decent at playing poker because she taught him how to play. but ace hates to gamble.

• during his time travelling he’s spent a lot of time sleeping in his car ( when he wasn’t abroad ) and he actually really enjoys the outdoors. likes to hike with his pup. also is likely to end up with a million dogs.

• he has a small ace of spades tattoo on the inside of his middle finger on his left hand -- he got it as a dare when he was drunk at seventeen. he hates it, but he’ll never get rid of it. he also has a fingers crossed tattoo on his right forearm, and a melting smiley face on his right index finger. more tbh he has at least ten. random tattoo supremacy. i'll add more when i can think.

• aside from his cartoons, he also loves to paint, sketch, play around with pottery and just get as creative as possible with anything artistic whatsoever. it's his safe space, his own form of therapy in a way. though he doesn’t let many people see the results as somehow they feel a lot more personal than his cartoon/animation work.

POSSIBLE / WANTED CONNECTIONS

roommate/ best friend -- taken by theodore cohen.

past flings/hook-ups -- ashamed to say there's been many. ace struggles with emotional vulnerability and absolutely runs from things.

childhood friends -- god forbid anyone knew him when he was openly sad, haha. jokes to disguise emotional damage for the win.

people who don't like him -- he's annoying, it's so likely.

party pals -- you're his favourite people.

a cousin ? aunt, uncle -- there will probably be some tension as his family is a mess, but this could be fun to play out.

idk he's an idiot give me everything.

#chq;intro #love him please he needs it.

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cringefaecompilation · 1 year ago

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so i just say your post asking about anyone who liked bh but hates the mn and. yes. i am one of those people. i started watching cr around episode 31 of vox machina, started with episode 1 of mn, and didn't make it past episode 5 on the first watch through. i didn't like any of the characters except yasha but having an ashley character be your favorite character is ROUGH - and seeing that pike was my favorite from vox machina (quickly followed by grog and scanlan), i learned the lesson pretty early on.

but yeah. i dislike the mn. i won't watch anything that doesn't have caduceus in it because he was the only saving grace for me and the only reason i actually started watching again. assholes just aren't interesting to me. i didn't care for them. now that i've watched some past episodes i dislike them less, but i don't find any of them really all that interesting. and when caduceus is the only reason you watch... well. it's not really a good time.

i didn't care about any of the npcs the group connected with except allura but, like, come ON. it's ALLURA VYSOREN. I didn't care about essek (still don't), pumat was good but not gilmore-esque, yussa... honestly he was the funniest npc just on accident cause he kept getting trapped in places he was sticking his nose in.

basically the characters just weren't the kind of characters i was ever interested in watching, the story line only garnered my attention very, very late, and, tbh, the fandom was (is) so fucking rancid that it just made me hate it more.

the moment exu came out i was so excited because i hoped fearne and orym would be in c3 and have loved them ever since. i would even say that like all the characters in bh and am invested in all their stories. chet can... sometimes get too much for me but that's mostly because i'm already overstimulated and has nothing to do with the actual character. even with ashton who is 100% california punk (your roots are showing, taliesin) and clashes against the punk lifestyle i've always lived only makes me respect them because, yeah. they're a punk. i'm a punk. fuck them; i'll love them forever.

huh, neat! i've never heard of someone getting into c1 midway and than into c2, usually it's the other way around. that's cool.

honestly i hadn't even considered that people may be COMPLETELY put off by the mn being assholes at the beginning, but then again i was also super taken aback when taliesin said that the nein were "almost all villains" but looking back on where they all began and their backstories, i can see it more.

i will agree with you that early c2 can be a little obnoxious to get through and while i was able to enjoy them (both the characters and the storyline) it's completely understandable why someone would get frustrated with them and stop watching. fandom toxicity and overall arc fatigue seem to be the most agreed on answers to why c3 fans if any don't like c2.

also the whole "caduceus is the only reason i liked c2" seems to be a sentiment for people that have become wholly disillusioned with critical role as a series, so it's nice to see someone still enjoying the series with that viewpoint.

for the last paragraph, i completely agree! though i really REALLY wanted dariax and opal to come along with them, we can see why (ep 64) it wouldn't have been viable.

i'm just shocked that everyone had pretty much the exact same answer, i swear i would have gotten at least one person that disliked it for a bizarrely specific reason.

#🍃#critical role #critrole

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ryuuaka713 · 4 years ago

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Soukoku & The Red Camellias

Ok, I have been thinking a lot of this lately, so I am just gonna let this all out.

You guys know this official art, right? Right?

This is literally one of my most favorite SKK official art. Like I legit thought that this is a fan-art until I saw an entire comment section in pinterest basically summarizing: “I can’t believe this is NOT a fanart”. I literally lost my shit that day because MY GOD this is so CLOSE! I’ve been in the BSD fandom since January, and I have been obsessing over Soukoku since Dead Apple.

But anyway, this official art--I showed this to my sister who has no idea what the anime is about, and I wanted an opinion from an outsider in regards of this official art just for the fun of it. And guess what she said: Apart from being GAY, she thinks that their relationship is almost similar to Romeo and Juliet (YEP! HER EXACT WORDS!). It is interesting, not just because these two act more like an aggressive version of R&J (or the anti-thesis of it), it is also the fact that the more I looked into this pic, the more I can see the whole bitter-sweetness to it.

So I decided to look up the meaning of Camellia flowers in which these two have been associated with by the fandom.

(OK, the next thing I am going to say will be something that not everyone will like. But please, hear me out)

I notice a lot of people (shippers to be precise), say that the Camellias represent love, desire, and longing. This meaning is based on WESTERN interpretation. But what about the JAPANESE symbolism of it?

In the Wikipedia version for the Hanakotoba (Japanese Floriography) the (Red) Tsubaki (the Japanese name for the Camellia) is indeed associated with “Love” (not far from the Western interpretation), but what’s interesting is that it also says: “Perishing with Grace”. Ok, Wikipedia is not entirely reliable, so I decided to do more research, and from what I’ve gathered, the Camellias are associated with Love (Again, derived from Western influence or the source is not that reliable), Divinity, and finally--Death.

So technically speaking, the reason why Tsubaki is associated with the divine is that it is used in tea ceremonies because it does not interfere with the scent of tea. Furthermore, it somehow evokes a sense of sacredness (whether directly to a Kami or not) to it, and you can see why this is almost in the same threshold as the Cherry Blossoms in terms of Japanese associations. Indeed, the Tsubaki is called the “Japanese Rose”, and very much like the Cherry Blossoms, these flowers carry a heavy meaning--Death.

Brutal as this may sound, I think the subject of Death behind the flowers is something that connects the most to Soukoku.

But before I go over that, it should be known that the Tsubaki is associated with “Noble Death”--this comes from the imagery of how the buds of the flower, when wilted, falls as a whole immediately instead of petal by petal. And many called this blossom as a form of “bad luck” because it resembles Decapitation. With that being said, the Tsubaki can be related as a symbolic imagery of a Samurai’s death (since the process of their execution involves having their heads cut off). And thus, it should emphasize the unwavering loyalty of the warrior (it makes sense as to why the petals are intact with the bud--but this is just my interpretation), and why the flower symbolizes a “noble death”.

Now what does got to do with Soukoku?

This applies more to Chuuya as the whole “sacredness”/”divinity” of the Tsubaki can be easily associated with the fact that he possessed the God of Calamity. And because Corruption means total destruction, Chuuya’s fate is literally death like what the Tsubaki implies. However, what I find even more interesting is that after reading how these flowers are associated with the samurai, this is very similar to Chuuya’s case. Chuuya in BSD is the personification of loyalty, specifically to the PM.

With his relationship with Dazai, it is a little bit different since Chuuya never wants to be his Dog (the most common symbol of loyalty). But what’s interesting enough is that he remains--CONSTANTLY trusts Dazai. In other words, he knows his motivations, trusts him, and would immediately jump into action. Chuuya would go as far as using the very thing that will kill him while keeping in mind that Dazai has a plan (e.g. Dead Apple). With that being said, this is exactly why Chuuya is the one who seems to be watching over Dazai while the latter is sleeping in the official art above. And the fact that the flower just rests on his open palm is well-connected to the aesthetic and “grace” of the Tsubaki. Chuuya’s corruption is brutally horrible, but the concept of his loyalty and trust is something that we can at least admire about him.

What about Dazai? Well, this is the part where things get a little complicated. One thing for sure, the whole death symbolism can be easily associated to his suicidal tendencies. But even so, this is still tied up (literally and figuratively speaking) to his relationship with Chuuya. Dazai said that his ideal suicide should be “clean and proper”--in other words, without burdening anyone. And yet, his death will always be tethered to Chuuya’s. This is seen when they are 15 when Rimbaud proposed that he must kill both Chuuya and Dazai to protect his crimes. This is again brought up in (SPOILERS!!!) Stormbringer when Mori brings up that if Dazai decides to give up and die, no one would save Chuuya (END SPOILERS!!!). In short they are inseparable.

And because of that, Dazai can see how he can easily influence the fate of his partner-- the very same person who is prone to death despite his desire to live. Thus, one of the reasons why he fights side by side with Chuuya. it is not just Chuuya’s complete trust in him that makes their partnership effective, but it is also his recognition of the boy’s desire to live. And that’s why we have this official art:

In this official art, it is not as delicate as the first one, but we see the Camellias again. This time, it is Dazai holding the flowers, and he is clutching them in his fists. Personally, I see this as him grasping to that life-line while Chuuya is using corruption. While Chuuya, his corruption and the camellias are about the concept of potential death, in Dazai’s case--the camellia serves as a “reminder of death” (not the actual death). Thus, why he is clutching them. After all, he recognizes that Chuuya doesn’t want to die (unlike him). Not to mention, Chuuya would willingly lay down his life to him (and vise versa). In other words, it just shows that with the symbolism of the Tsubaki, both characters--despite the “hate” they have for each other--are always connected, and it is through Death. Death because of their circumstances, or because of their characterizations.

Furthermore, the complexity of Tsubaki being this beautiful flower that is considered as sacred, a love token, and a symbolic imagery of death--parallels so much with the complexity of their relationship. I am not going to dive in further with the analysis of their relationship since I know a handful of people who are excellent in doing that. But what I’m saying here: the Camellias are not only a love token, the same way you can’t say that Dazai and Chuuya’s relationship is like a love-hate relationship (it is way more complicated than that).

With that being said, there is bittersweet connotation in their relationship. It is Romeo and Juliet in a sense that they are connected by tragedy, regardless whether they are in the same organization or not.

And that’s it, thanks for reading my ted-talk!

#soukoku #dazai osamu #nakahara chuuya #dazai x chuuya #bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd analysis #skk

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jonnnysuh · 3 years ago

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How To Write Good // Vernon

A/N: It all started with watching Vernon’s English tutor series and now we’re here omg. This is my first series so please give it some love <3 kind of unedited so lmk if there’s any mistakes! PART ONE | PART TWO | PART THREE

PAIRING: Vernon x You

GENRE: enemies to ???, fluff, student!vernon, tutor!vernon

WARNINGS: swearing

WORD COUNT: 2.7K

SUMMARY: There’s the crisp air of campus, the rush of something new, and a four year degree ahead of you. Your college experience doesn’t go off as smoothly as you’d hoped when you fall asleep on course selection day and are stuck with left over electives. Struggling to get through your creative writing class, you have no idea how you’re going to get through this semester. Fate steps in when the stranger you fought in the library might just be your only chance at passing. This is all just part of the college experience… right?

Orange leaves began surrounding the burnt red brick pathway, and the small green hills of the campus quad. Fall was fast approaching, without much warning. The bright summer sky, now often clouds of gray. The wind brushed past you, causing your hair to fly up. Your legs brushed together quickly as you tried to make your way through campus to get to your Writing in the Arts class. You swore to yourself that you wouldn't sleep through course selection but sometimes sleep was an actual priority to you...and it so happened to be on that day. Not your first choice, but definitely miles ahead of Economic History on the list of leftover electives.

You flipped over your wrist to take a look at the time on your brown pleather watch. 8:12.

Professor Hampton was an older woman, who always kept her sandy brown hair in a slick tight low bun. She had enforced a rule that the doors to the lecture hall would shut 15 minutes past the hour. If you didn’t make it then you’d have to get notes from a classmate. Maybe it’d be fine if you had a friend in the class that was actually punctual, but you had often sat alone in the same spot in the far left corner of the class room. Time was definitely never on your side as you reckoned you only had 3 minutes left until your trip downtown was rendered useless.

You swung the thick metal door open, and began pumping your legs forward, not stopping until you reached the top of the stairs. To your luck, the lecture hall was on the exact end of the hallway. As you took longer strides, your gray backpack bounced behind you. Finally arriving at the end of the long hallway, you came face to face with Professor Hampton, who had a scowl so thick you’d think it was drawn on with a felt tip permanent marker. Without an ounce of forgiveness, that old lady secured the door shut, eyes keen on your betrayed face just a few centimetres from hers.

With the little pride you still had, you contained the urge to bang on the door repeatedly and say "OPEN UP."

If you hadn't had time to get ready that day, or missed your bus, dammit this would've been the boiling point that would've driven you to kick the wall. Your saving grace was that there was a cute guy typing away on his laptop in this hallway and you'd be damned if you were about to look a fool.

It was that moment, you knew that if you were going to pass this class without sacrificing a wink of sleep, you were going to have to make a friend that was good at writing notes. And quick.

—

The next day, you navigated your way through the twists and turns of the library, never having had been there a day in your life. You swear you’d gone in a circle at this point. You promised your best friend, Taylor that you’d secure a spot for your impromptu study date. Although you both had good intentions, you knew it was more than likely going to become a gossip session that involved sometimes looking at class material.

Among the rows and rows of occupied tables, you finally found an empty table, situated next to the window that overlooked the architecture and art buildings. You settled in the chair, slipping your laptop out of your tote bag , and typing mindlessly to look busy while you waited for your friend. With a look around the room, you wondered if people actually studied at the library or if they were just faking it like you.

You were so immersed in your game of Tetris you almost didn’t hear the voice that said , “Hey, I think you’re at the wrong table.”

You paused your game and surveyed the empty wooden table you were sitting at. You blinked slowly at the brown haired man. “I was here first.”

“That might be true but I booked it out for the hour.” The stranger stood with a slight slouch, sporting a backwards snapback and a deep green hoodie. He didn't look like the type to hang out around the library- but then again, neither did you. You swear you had seen him before, but you couldn't place where.

Did I go to high school with him? you thought.

What if he was ugly and had a glow up and that’s why I don’t recognize him?

You took a closer look at him.

Nah. I don’t think he’s ever been ugly in his life.

“Look. My name's right here." He leaned forward, showing you his screen.

[TABLE 9] 3:00pm - Vernon C.

You pushed the phone away, unimpressed. "But you showed up late."

"It was only 6 minutes." Vernon scoffed, as if his tardiness would automatically forfeit him from his table.

"Well, have you ever heard of finder's keepers?"

Vernon nodded, his voice pointed. "But have you ever heard of fair and square?"

You tried your best to conceal the fact that you were somewhat amused by his elementary-level comeback.

"Could you look into your great, big heart to share?” You pouted tauntingly.

"Oh, yeah, because you need a table to play Tetris." He responded sarcastically but it was as if he had crept into your mind. You dreaded the idea of being on your feet trying to find another place for your game.

Your best friend rolled in between you two innocently, confused at the interaction at hand. It was like a kid walking in on their mom and dad fighting for the first time… except dad is a Tetris-hating stranger you just met 3 minutes ago.

“Sorry I’m late, Y/N.” Taylor interjected, trying her best to mend the atmosphere with a grin. Vernon's posture went notably straight as he exhaled, returning a sweet close-lipped smile. You couldn't help but notice the way he looked at your friend- you squinted at the shadow of the difference between this Vernon and the one that basically told you to fuck off only moments prior.

Without a doubt, you knew he was suffering from the "Taylor Effect".

Taylor was your textbook girl next door; equipped with a warm demeanour, and a confidence that was endearing rather than cocky. You could tell that Vernon was trying his best not to stare so obviously, but he was failing miserably.

Because everyone gravitated towards her, many found it odd that she chose to keep you as company. Sometimes you thought she stuck around only because your personalities were so starkly different and would emphasize how great she was, but time and time again she proved she was notable on her own accord.

"Did I interrupt something?"

You and the man shared a look.

Vernon had a feeling that if he let you speak first, that you might ruin his chances with Taylor, and there was absolutely NO shot that he was going to tell her what had just happened. You were quick to take advantage of the situation.

“Vernon just wanted to take the tab-“

He shook his head, "No, no, no I was just leaving."

You raised your eyebrow, smugly.

“I'll see you later,” He bid. Your eyes widened as he went closer to you, clasping his hand around yours and pulling you forwards into an almost embrace. He dapped you up. Vernon dapped you up. What? Did he think you were bros now?

Ya, right. You thought. This is my first and last time in this library. You will never see me or my Tetris again.

And with that, he swung his backpack over his shoulder coolly and headed down the long carpeted aisle in the other direction.

Only a few moments later did he return to go through the north exit. “Wrong way.” He mumbled, charting past both of you.

—

“So you don’t know anyone in that class?” Taylor said in disbelief as you two sat at the table you had only marginally won.

“No, I missed the first two weeks so by the time I actually went to class they already had their groups.” you responded, blowing air out of your mouth in frustration.

School had only just begun and Taylor had swept up a bunch of friends, including you, in just this one semester.

You, on the other hand, were awkward, but not in the forgivable way. You never knew the right thing to say, and your sarcasm drew a fine line between a joke and the truth. You felt like you always had to bite your tongue to hold a decent conversation with someone. In turn, this scared a lot of people away, and resulted in a small but good group of friends that understood you.

For some reason though, you did well with confrontation. That was the only time you could force yourself to not care about what someone else thought about you. Other than that, your communication skills were almost useless.

“So go up to those kids and say hi.” Taylor responded.

You knew your best friend was being well meaning, but sometimes she felt like she oversimplified your problems because she saw it through her own lens. Of course it would be easy for Taylor to do so, but for you it would be a different story. Your stomach turned at even the mere thought of introducing yourself to the group of strangers that always sat all the way in the front of the lecture hall.

“I’ll just figure it out. I don't know how to just talk to people."

“What about that guy that I just saw you with? What was that about?”

You cleared your throat, fixing your attention to your laptop screen. Getting work done suddenly seemed more interesting.

“No, no, no look at me.” Taylor dragged your laptop away.

You begrudgingly looked at your friend. “What about him?”

“Who was that? He was kind of cute.” She cupped her cheek with her hand and sat closer, clearly interested. It was rare to see you with anyone other than your usual friend group so Taylor was invested in your endeavours outside of it.

You knew that if you told Taylor about your weird argument with a stranger, that she’d explain that you were unfriendly, that you needed to be nicer, etc. etc. You didn’t need a lecture today.

“Just some dude who finished using the table.”

Taylor chuckled, “What kind of guy says bye like that to a person he just met?”

Her guess was as good as yours.

��

ONE WEEK LATER

Determination is setting 25 morning alarms, pre-picking your clothes and opting for an on-the-go breakfast in order to just make it on time for class. You took your final strides towards the class slowly, knowing you finally had time on your side. Would it be crazy to call waking up at 6am a victory? Doesn’t matter, you were just so happy, you could answer Professor Hampton’s questions… that is, if you listened.

At the bottom of the lecture hall, sat the aforementioned groups, while the top were lonesome stragglers looking at their phones in an effort to look less lonely. You knew they were probably just reviewing their settings; turning their wifi on and off.

Professor Hampton cleared her throat into the microphone at the front of the class, prompting you to pick up the pace to your regular spot at the far left corner.

No way.

Your speed slowed down again, as you craned your head to get a better look at a brown-haired boy sitting by himself.

Despite the numerous empty seats to choose from, your caffeine rush assisted you in making the possibly dumb decision of sitting exactly right next to him. He seemed unbothered, though as he didn’t look up to question it.

Professor Hampton played her slides, while you pulled out your laptop out of your tote bag.

“Hey.” You whispered.

The man’s light brown eyes flickered towards you.

“You’re in this class?” Vernon whisper-exclaimed.

It registered in your brain that this might’ve been a mistake.

You nodded.

Vernon kept his focus on the front of the class, his pencil swivelled away on his lined paper. You had never seen anyone actually take real-life notes before. You scanned his paper, pleasantly surprised at the organization.

“Why did you dap me up last week?”

“I honestly don’t know what I was doing.” He admitted.

Boys do dumb things around pretty girls. You'd seen it happen so many times with Taylor.

“She’s cute isn’t she?”

“Who?” Vernon was quick to play dumb, but he clearly knew.

You were fascinated by how he was writing and listening to you at the same time.

“Taylor—my friend.”

Vernon squinted his eyes, either to think or because he couldn’t see the projection clearly. It made you wonder why he sat in the back of the class if that was the case.

“Yeah, she is.”

Bingo.

You silently relished in your impromptu decision to sit next to a stranger.

“What would you say if I got you a date with her?”

Vernon put his pencil down. “You strike me as the kind of person who wouldn’t do that out of the kindness of your heart.”

You snorted. “You’re right.”

Vernon let out a deep sigh, pushing his hoodie sleeve up his arms. He relaxed back in his seat and stared at you as he waited for your proposal.

“What is it?” His deep voice was littered with impatience but it was clear he was at least curious.

You weren’t prepared to gain his full attention. Your mind went several ways as you collected your thoughts to be as concise as possible.

“I’m struggling in this class, okay? I can’t always make it on time, and creative writing? Not really something I’m interested in.”

“Then why’d you take the class?”

“Why does anyone do anything here? For the credit.” You responded as if the answer was obvious.

Vernon’s raised eyebrows was enough to tell you that he was actually passionate about this subject— which was perfect for you if you wanted to pass the class.

“How do I come into this, though?” His patience running thin from your incredibly interesting backstory.

“If you tutor me up until midterms and I pass, I’ll get you a date with Taylor.”

He shook his head “What if you fail?”

“Then you can take that as a reflection of your teaching skills,” Vernon rolled his eyes. Okay maybe that was a bad joke. “but on the plus side you’ve gained a new friendddddd.”

Professor Hampton gave you two a dirty look on her way back from shutting the lecture hall’s door. Vernon picked up his pencil to look busy and you tapped on your trackpad to turn the screen on.

“And what if I say no?” Vernon said between his teeth, catching the professor glare right at him with her scowl turned up to one hundred.

“Then I’ll shit talk about you to Taylor so you never have a chance.” You threatened. Your mom always urged you to use your brain, and boy, were you using it.

“You want me to teach you how to be creative?”

You shrugged. “I mean, how hard can it be?”

Vernon looked down at his notes contemplating his choices. He was silent for so long that you actually started typing notes.

“Y/N” Vernon whispered. You seemed to be fully immersed in the lesson now. Your eyes absorbing the information... Maybe writing was kind of fascinating.

“Y/N” He tried again, snapping you out of a trance.

“My bad.” you apologized. “I didn’t know the interesting part of the story was called the climax like ew—”

“I can only tutor you on Thursdays between 6 and 8 in the library. Bring your laptop and be prepared to learn.”

You knew you didn’t have class at those hours, so it should’ve been fine, but you also dreaded staying after school longer than you had to.

“What about 4-6?” You pleaded.

Vernon looked offended at your counter offer. “No. 6-8”

“4:30…?” You tried once again.

Vernon snorted at your no-quit attitude. “You wanna pass or not?”

You stuck out your hand defeatedly and Vernon shook on it before either of you could change your mind. Vernon was your new tutor.

Maybe Taylor was right. All you had to do was go up to someone and say “hi.”

And blackmail them. And use your friend as bait.

Making friends was easy.

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chaoticriderlessb · 3 years ago

Text

I'm bored, so here's music genre headcanons for the Host Club + a thought I have that's been swimming around in my brain:

Tamaki is...well...Tamaki, so this guy possible somehow enjoys every single music genre in existence. Although, it's possible he prefers classical above everything else.

Haruhi is a bit of a difficult one, so...I feel like she could be very much like Tamaki, but she could also simply enjoy pop or pop-rock.

Honey-senpai, I feel like could prefer either the most popular current music or maybe ambiance music...or reggae...whatever reggae is because I don't actually know (please, don't hurt me!).

Mori-senpai...he's a little difficult for me, but I feel like he'll listen to almost anything, depending on his moods...like rock, punk rock, folk music, or maybe electronic or blues.

Hikaru seems like he's a rock-everything type of person. Indie rock, alternative rock, punk rock, maybe even a tad bit of heavy metal, who knows.

Kaoru kinda screams mostly jazz or techno/dance music to me...but that could just be me. For all we know, he could actually just like the same type of music as his twin.

I saved the best for last (well, best in my heart): Kyoya! Now...again, this could just be me...but considering how Kyoya is, even before meeting Tamaki, I really feel like Kyoya really enjoys a wide range of what I like to call "hard music". So basically, all types of rock + maybe some heavy metal (depending on the band or song) + maybe a bit of electronica but who knows...he is not only the Shadow King, but he is also definitely a wild card. He likes to surprise people when or if they ask him what type of music he enjoys. I personally can just see him listening to this type of music.

Kyoya's is my favorite that I've come up with, honestly. Especially since I happen to enjoy a lot of different rock/heavy metal music. I enjoy some other genres, too, but not quite as much as rock/heavy metal...hell, I'll even listen to a bunch of movie/show/videogame OSTs!

My older siblings pretty much got me into bands like Linkin Park, Paramore, Flyleaf, Disturbed, Three Days Grace, etc. My dad actually got me into Evanescence (her first album, though), and...now that I think about it...I think one of my aunts actually got me into Three Days Grace. But, I could be wrong.

Anyway.... Since I was maybe 18(?), I've been listening to a lot of DAGames. Not all of his stuff, but a lot of it. He's about the only youtuber who makes/writes songs that I actually listen to. He does a variety of rock stuff, and honestly, lately, I've been kinda associating a few of his stuff with Kyoya. I don't know why! Maybe it's the lyrics.... But everytime I listen to like, "Left Behind", "Break My Mind", "Unfixable", or recently, "Lost in the Dark", I just can't help but think of Kyoya.

Wow, I might actually have to throw together a playlist for him. I usually don't do that kind of thing...mainly because I just plain and simple don't pay attention to stuff like that...but Kyoya is proving to be an exception.

Ok, if he could just stop laughing at me, now, that'd be great.

Anywho, I rambled, again, but those are my thoughts.

What do you think? Accurate music genres for the Host Club? Or do you guys have any other ideas?

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in-tua-deep · 3 years ago

Note

Ok I totally want to hear more about this survivors au/Delores is real! How do the siblings handle having this different version of Five? Five may be better adjusted but he still has to heard his family around like a bunch of stray cats. What happens when Hazel and Cha Cha show up? How do they find out that Vanya causes the apocalypse and how does Five handle that revelation?!

here is the thing, i think the survivors au has the potential to be HILARIOUS

no one knows how to handle a well-adjusted five, and this absolutely includes the commission

So you mentioned Hazel and Cha-Cha?? Five in this au was not nearly as absolutely feral as he is in the show bc he knows how to interact with people - he was raised by a competent adult and a weird best friend and they occasionally saw other survivors as well

please picture old Five hanging around the water cooler and chatting with Hazel

the other funny thing is that Five is competent passing - he is well adjusted emotionally but functionally?? Hazel is out there complaining about dental being cut and office parties and budgets and Five is there sipping his drink having never filed taxes in his life. Five doesn't know what the fuck a dental plan is, he was a child soldier and then lived in an apocalypse.

So please picture for me Hazel being like "okay I know corporate wants us to keep what we're being paid to ourselves but fuck that, workers unite, what do you get paid as a legend old timer?"

and five is like "you're getting paid? i get to not get tossed back into the apocalypse, I think"

"but what about expense forms? what about medical care?"

"I'm like 80% sure i'm being experimented on, actually." Five says nonchalantly, "Don't get me wrong, my idea of medical care is fucked by being a child soldier but I'm pretty sure regular people don't have electrodes attached to their heads every time they get a checkup. Could be wrong though! My ex-dad used to monitor my brainwaves while I slept so like, my idea of appropriate shit is fucked, you know?"

This is a Five who was raised by Rick, he is polite to his coworkers. If Dot asked him if he wanted to grab lunch, Five would have gone and grabbed lunch with her or politely said that he couldn't.

Cha Cha only ever talks to Five when she wants to talk shop, so they've had a couple of conversations about weapons but not much else tbh, Hazel just tends to be more personable

So when they're sent after Five, Hazel is much more hesitant to kill who he perceives as a "work friend" and also is definitely thinking about all the times Five casually revealed a way the commission was being highkey shady about him, such as the potential experimentation, no pay, working under duress etc. He's much more easily turned against the commission because he's even more primed to say "fuck the commission" than he is in canon

Hazel out here like "how did Five break his contract when Five wasn't even being paid? I kind of want to read it."

Hazel out here like "I would unionize if I didn't think the commission was anti-union enough to send literal assassins after me if I suggested it :/"

meanwhile with the siblings

Five just. talks over them a lot and makes so much sense that it's actually really hard to argue with him, and he's weirdly considerate of his family's obligations

Like Diego is like "i have to go see Patch" then Five is like "that's great I'm proud of you buddy, it would actually be really handy to have some law enforcement read into the situation if you think she's up to the task. that goes for everyone by the way! If y'all have people you trust, more bodies would be super helpful I think"

the entire family, collectively, who have like zero trusted social links: uhhhhhhhh

Diego, with this weird permission, probably?? Does? Awkwardly attempt to read Patch into the situation? Patch is, obviously, like "what the fuck, Diego" but probably goes with him to the mansion (????????) because she's concerned and then meets his fucking whacko family with their superpowers and suddenly everything is 100% more realistic

Five is just like "yes hello I'm aware I look like a child, i'm actually in my late 50s or early 60s (apocalypse time amiright) because of time travel stuff. Yes I am Five Hargreeves who went missing in like 2002 or whatever. anyway it's lovely to meet you, i'm so glad diego has someone he trusts, and considering my sibling's shifty looks when i told them to invite anyone they trusted this genuinely makes me concerned that Diego is the most socially well-adjusted of them."

"That cannot be possible." Patch says, like someone who has met Diego Hargreeves.

"You haven't met the rest." Five says sympathetically, "In our defense we were raised in isolation as child soldiers."

"That... explains so much." Is all Patch can say to that, "But you seem..."

"I'm adopted." Five waves away.

"We're ALL adopted." Diego grits out, very aggrieved by this and also not sure if he likes the fact that Patch seems friendly with Five, or at least is listening to him?

"I'm double adopted."

However! With the recruitment of Patch, herding Diego becomes like 90% easier.

Honestly the worst to herd are probably Luther and Allison? Luther because he's Number One and resents Five taking charge and also resents Five's casual dismissal of Reginald and also suspects that Five (or at least the commission) has something to do with Reginald's death?

Allison because she is torn between following Luther and helping him and helping Five but also calling Patrick and Claire at every possible moment while ALSO trying to repair her relationship with Vanya. She's flighty - she'd bail on a Five-apocalypse-assignment if Vanya mentioned being hungry or if Luther called or anything like that

Vanya likes to be included and, if asked, would probably drop as many current obligations as she can. Like she would probably cancel her teaching if Five genuinely and sincerely asked her for her help, which he does because he's 100% sure Dolores would manifest in front of him and smack him if he dared even imply someone without powers wouldn't be helpful

Vanya is like "I'm not sure if i'll be helpful - I don't have powers ):" and Patch is like "wtf are you talking about - my superpowers are Gun, Backup, and Reading Comprehension and i am like the most useful member of this team right now"

Vanya gets a confidence boost just from hanging out with Patch honestly, I think they should be friends

Klaus is thrilled to be included are you kidding?? He says he does it for money but he's just happy to be there and also as one of the most emotionally intelligent siblings he is mildly concerned about the fact that Five looks like he's about to cry and also emotes

Five also gives Klaus positive reinforcement, hugs, and Five absolutely weaponizes the I'm not mad, but I believe that you can do better and I'm going to give you more chances because I love you and fully believe that next time you'll be amazing way that Rick used on him.

I feel like Five ends up saying something along the lines of "I understand that x is really important, and we're definitely going to look into it. Is it something that needs to be addressed right now, or is it something that can wait until after April 1st? If it can wait, I can write it down here on this list so we don't forget. If it can't wait then we can figure out a time to address it and help you" a lot

Like Grace malfunctioning and potentially killing Reginald?

"We don't have to make this decision right now." Five says patiently, "Because Grace is a robot, we have some options. Living with a robot who is potentially malfunctioning and homicidal is dangerous, but Luther saying that means admitting that Reginald might have made a mistake or error with Grace's programming or upkeep. I haven't been here for a long time, but I remember Reginald being very precise. Regardless, this isn't a choice between permanently shutting her off or not. We can shut her down temporarily until we can fully address the issue. We can ask and see if there is a 'system reboot' option or some sort of system check that Grace can undergo. We can try find and hire an expert to take a look at her programming to find the issue."

Five gives this speech while like, organizing the weaponry in the house on a table very nonchalantly

Five out here making buzzer noises at his siblings arguments like "yeah no that's a false dichotomy and a strawman's argument, want to try again?"

(Look apocalypse nights were long and they had games that were literally about arguing pointless shit like ranking types of chairs or the best way to break out of a prison without powers and things could get heated)

"Who died and made you boss?" Luther demands.

"Uh, the world? Were you not listening?" Five asks, looking very purposefully confused.

It gets even MORE delightful when Five reads Rick into the situation because a) he promised and b) his siblings really have like, no connections jeeze

Rick fully believes that this is his son from the future, like Five introduced himself, but Five skipped out on a few key details. Such as being adopted.

So Rick spends a solid chunk of time just staring at Five, who looks basically nothing like him, trying to think like, who is his mother ???? if we save the world will Five stop existing? why would I name my child 'Five'? Does everyone have powers in the future? was there like... a radioactive apocalypse? would radiation give future humans superpowers? when did my life turn into a comic book? am i even allowed to ask these questions? will knowledge of the future fuck things up?

and then when Five comes back and is like "what is up everyone this is my dad Rick who will be joining us, he doesn't have any memories of me thanks to time travel but if anyone is mean to him i WILL kneecap them"

"Your DAD?"

Five does kidney punch Klaus for saying that Rick is a DILF but otherwise everyone just is like, warily looking at this Normal Dad Man in confusion because?? This is the dude who raised Five, who they watched take out like an entire commission team by himself yesterday? He looks so. Normal.

Rick is very confused and like, wonders if he's supposed to be the team mascot? But Five keeps involving him and asking his opinion and in return Rick enforces snack breaks and makes everyone sandwiches and has gentle talks with everyone

Every time Five notices someone about to blow he just lovingly makes sure that that person is alone in a room with Rick

Luther ends up crying on the sofa with Rick gently patting his back as Rick calmly states that Luther seems like he's put a lot of time and effort into his family and making his father proud and that since Reginald isn't here to say it, Rick will have to be the one to say that he's proud and that they've been dropped into a difficult and stressful situation - so soon after Reginald's death when they're still grieving! - and he's doing so well

Luther, experiencing unconditional positive paternal regard for the first time in his life: i don't know why i'm crying so much

honestly this is just a comedy of juggling the gang, having impromptu therapy sessions and discussions, investigating the apocalypse and the eye, leonard trying to meet vanya continuously and failing because she's constantly surrounding by family or rick/patch, the commission trying their best to bust up the dream team/isolate Vanya/kill or remove Five, while Hazel lives out his romcom dreams with Agnes and also says "fuck the commission"

#HUH?#survivors au #well adjusted five au #long post #far tua long #five recruits rick to be team dad #rick is DEEPLY confused #but he's the kind of person that rolls with it #dolores probably ends up tagging along as well on at least one occasion #dolores and patch bond #five pretends that dolores is a new sibling and not his dolores #five calls rick 'dad' and it messes with everyone else #patch is on team fuck-the-apocalypse(-and-reginald)#vanya is never alone so fuck leonard #five finds out that vanya causes the apocalypse and is like #vanya: HUH?#luther: maybe we should lock vanya up -#rick: are there are any other possible actions that might be more appropriate in this situation?#vanya: i could try get more meds to take and we could address the powers thing after april 1st #vanya immediately gets validated that reginald sucks #even luther who has had multiple conversations with rick is like 'dad... didn't always make the best choices...'#everyone: :0 #hazel doesn't kill patch so he probably joins team anti-apocalypse at some point #hazel: why are you a child #five: oh you know i'm young at heart and all that #OH forgot to mention one of the main differences in this au is that five like properly grew up this time #so while he is inconvenienced by his body he's not so deeply uncomfortable or angry about it #just resigned #'this might as well happen' - five #five probably makes jokes about it as well

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thefanficmonster · 4 years ago

Text

Take That!

Corpse Husband & Reader (Female) ft. Streamer Gang

Warnings: Mentions of Depression, Suppressed Sadness, Swearing

Genre: Platonic Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, RPF (Real Person Fic)

Summary: What is a friend? Your smile through the tears. The umbrella over your head when it starts raining. The ointment to your wound. But if you wanna put it in a more literal manner, a friend is something that doesn’t have a concrete definition. It can be the person you sit next to in class or the person who’s hundreds of miles away from you and you’re connected to through a Discord call.

Requested by Anon. Hello dear! Thank you so much for your request, sorry it’s taken me so long to complete and post it but here it finally is and I hope you enjoy the read if you happen to come across the fic. Love, Vy ❤

There are those days when I wake up excited for a new day. There are also those days when the thought of playing Among Us with my friends is all that gets me out of bed. And then there are those days when not even that can get me to budge. Today is one of those days.

I’d still be in bed right now had I not needed to use the bathroom. On my way back to hide under my covers, I heard my cat’s meow from the kitchen, reminding me she needed to be fed. After tending to that task I just sort of lost will to return to bed either. Speaking truthfully, today is a will-less day. The type of day where I have no idea what to do with myself because I feel so odd and uncomfortable: heavy and bustling head, motivation below zero no matter whether I have zero tasks to tend to or a mountain high pile of work. It’s a laying on the floor and letting my mind eat away at me type of day and I can’t say I appreciate it.

The only thing I have to look forward to is the game of Among Us Corpse invited me to yesterday. Had I known I’d wake up feeling like absolute shit, I wouldn’t have accepted. I just know I’ll be a downer the whole time because I suck at covering up how I feel - my smiling masks and faux happiness don’t cut it but staying quiet is even worse because I’m typically and energetic and bubbly person, always having something to say or a comment to add to the conversation. Always looking to make people laugh.

Well, it’s hard to make people laugh when you feel like a deflated balloon.

I can’t describe the feeling any better than that - I feel empty, maybe a little sad somewhere in the mix, unmotivated. I keep these feelings to myself cause whenever I bring them up people just blow me off, saying I’m describing laziness but more dramatically. Either that or burnout which is sometimes the case, but I’m more than sure that it’s not the culprit for today. You can only blame burnout so many times.

Anyway, I make a mental note, promising myself I’m not gonna bail on my friends regardless of whether my mood gets better or worse. Who knows, maybe a gaming session with them is exactly what I need.

* * *

Not much has changed with my emotional state - I’ve spent a good chunk of the day surfing through TV channels and my socials with nothing else to occupy my mind but the overwhelming knowledge that I’m not feeling ok and that hyperawareness of a void that I feel but cannot describe. At one point, Corpse sent me a text to confirm I’d be participating in the gaming session and I was this close to saying no. This close to coming up with some bullshit excuse and bailing but I didn’t, thankfully.

Here’s the thing about this drop in mood of mine - I know it’s gonna be gone by morning. It bullies me, beats and batters me for only twenty four hours - never more, never less. Like clockwork and as precise as a Swiss watch. And so fucking annoying. No matter what I do, I can’t end it prematurely and I can never wake up feeling down and unmotivated the next morning - there’s always a surge of motivation coursing through me and it drives me to be super productive as if making up for what I didn’t do the previous day when I was in the dumps.

It’s a twisted way of it showing me I’m powerless and at the mercy of a force that, despite being mine and existing within me, I’m completely unfamiliar with. It’s so fucking unfair, it’s disheartening.

“Hi everyone! Sorry I’m late.“ I greet the five people who have already gathered in the Discord call and the Among Us lobby.

Yeah, sorry I’m late, I was contemplating not showing up at all last minute

“Don’t worry about it, many people are running late as you can see.“ Rae replies reassuringly, “How’s your day? Anything spectacular happen?“

I can’t help but scoff, “Yeah sure, a TON of spectacularism in my life on the daily. From the large stack of papers I couldn’t bring myself to touch, to the dusty surfaces all over my apartment I didn’t convince myself to clean - it’s all fabulous over here.”

Fuck, that was too real

“Whoa, where’d all this sarcasm come from?“ Rae asks, sounding genuinely baffled rather than teasing, “It’s never been your strong suit.“

“Neither has unproductivity.“ Corpse, my best friend, chimes in, “Everything ok?“

Well, I admit, I should’ve known better than to have an outburst like that in front of people who have known me for a while now and can probably gauge my emotions even without me admitting to them. I truly don’t know where it came from. Hell, I didn’t even see it coming.

“Nah, it’s ok. I’m just being lazy, I guess.” I’m quick to withdraw and brush off any suspicion. The last thing I want is to worry my friends or, even worse, receive the same response from them: that I’m being dramatic, that I’m attention-seeking, that I’m just lazy and unmotivated as are most people of my generation.

“You know, what people often self-diagnose as ‘laziness’ often turns out to be something more serious. I don’t mean to scare you, but it could be depression.“ Corpse says after a brief moment of silence in the call, his voice soft and cautious as if explaining a complex problem to a kid who’s bound to be hurt by what it’s told.

I can’t help but chuckle. He has no idea how much he’s relieved me by saying that. I always ‘don’t want to talk about it’ and ‘want to change the subject’ while what I truly need happens to be the complete opposite. I need someone to hear me out, I need someone who will not brush me and my concerns off like we don’t matter. I need someone who’ll understand. And if these people who have openly struggled with anxiety or depression don’t get me, who will?

“Yeah, I genuinely thought I thought of myself as a lowlife while I was in college cause I started losing motivation for everything and started fearing what was to come. I began avoiding going out and talking to people cause I felt like I was the sore thumb in the friend group I had - the only one without any specific goal or a dream.“ Leslie says out of the blue, “Turns out I suffered through a burnout so bad it turned into an anxiety/depression combo that I just blamed on being a lazy college student.“

“Same here!“ Toast pipes in, “I was bedridden for a while during the first days of my streaming career, for a very ridiculous reason - I believed I didn’t deserve the attention I was getting and I wasn’t doing as well as people gave me credit for. So that had me crippled with self-doubt for a long while.“

“I still don’t believe I’m doing as well as I get credit for, but oh well.“ Leslie laughs, “I already told you all about my dumpster-fire of a brain, so I’m instead gonna say: what you need is an appointment with a therapist. Also - you need to stop underestimating your struggles. Invalidating yourself and what you’re going through is gonna make things only worse for you. You need to love yourself.“

“And you need us!“ Rae exclaims, “You need the best support you can get and, lucky for you, we’re the best in the business. Count on us always being there for you, Y/N. Cause we always will be.“

“You’re never alone. We’re all just a call or a text away. Especially me.“ Corpse adds, “I’m basically at your service 24/7, just like you’ve always been for me. What are best friends for if not sharing mental struggles and lifting each other up afterwards?“

I don’t know when this smile made its home on my face but it seems to be rather happy with where it is and wants to stay. Something tells me that thanks to these guys, it will indeed stay there for quite some time. And every time it tries to slip away, they’ll be there to bring it back.

“Then let’s lift each other up, shall we? I mean, what better way to do it other than killing each other and getting away with it?“ I attempt a giggle, hiding my emotions behind it like my life depends on it. Chances are they heard all I’m feeling in my voice, but I can only hope they’re not gonna mention it.

“Y/N, hun, I’m sorry to burst your bubble but....you never get away with it.“ Corpse wheezes, causing me to narrow my eyes and frown.

“Oh, you’re so gonna get it now!“ I exclaim, cracking my knuckles before getting my hands on my keyboard, “Start the game! I have a point to prove!“

And just like that, in what felt like the blink of an eye, the clouds have shuffled aside to make path for the sunshine to grace my brain with positivity I was not expecting to feel until tomorrow morning. I can’t give myself the credit for that though - it all goes to these amazing people I have the honor of calling friends.

I may have no power over it on my own, but with the gang’s help, I can take full control of it. And as a middle finger to the melancholy, I’ll do it all with a bright smile on my face.

Take that, brain!

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a-simple-imagine · 4 years ago

Text

An Afterthought pt.2

Synopsis: Maeve shows up on your doorstep one night all sad and what not then leaves. Now it’s your turn to try and make amends.

Pairing: Queen Maeve x fem!reader

Words: 4.1+

A/N - Did someone call for an angsty part 2 to a story i put out almost a year ago?? I got a fair few requests for this so here it is. I hope you enjoy it sorry if you don’t. request are open btw.

Warning - Swearing, violence and a very brief mention of zombies.

Part 1

Thoughts about Maeve are more frequent as of late. What was once just a passing thought as you spotted her face on magazine covers or painted on walls now became bothersome. What exactly had brought her to your doorstep that night? It had just been so unexpected. It left you so painfully curious for answers. There had to be more to the story. Not to mention, you also found yourself missing here once again: more so than before. A deep ache that came from an old forgotten wound that had begun to heal through time. A week had passed before you decided to do something stupid. It's amazing what you can find out online these days.

A bright sun sat high in the sky which left the air dry and you feeling warm. The hustle and bustle of city life was always your least favourite thing about living here and it was even worse today. Crowds of people stand behind a barrier that was maned by a few security guards. Did these people not having anything better to do than gawk at supes all day? You had basically scrubbed the internet to find out where she would be today which lead to a Twitter thread between someone called @MAEVESWIFE and @maelander who were talking about a vought commercial being shot outside the tower today. Queen Maeve and Homelander would both be there. But at least you personally knew here unlike these guys. It was kind of cool how many people idolised them. Working your way through the crowd, you earned some very dirty looks for trying to get to the front. Homelander and Maeve were in fact stood before a crew of people and a few cameras, smiling brightly and saying something you couldn't quite hear. Maeve seemingly spots you among the crowd so you wave a little. It was hard to figure out if she was happy or furious but she signals for a break and charged towards you. The crowd erupts with excitement as the Queen herself graces them with her presence and Homelander trails behind her. The woman offers nothing but polite smiles to the adoring fans as she takes your hand leading you along the length of the barrier and over to the threshold. It was safe to say that just about everyone who was still standing behind the security guards was very pissed off that you were getting special treatment.

"What are you doing here?" She growls through gritted teeth and a plastered on smile that disappears once you're out of view from prying eyes.

"I wanted to see you after-"

"Who's this?" You both turn to him and then back to each other.

"Oh my god, it's Homelander," You express, plastering on your brightest smile. Tall, Muscular with an award-winning smile. Bright blue eyes and silky blonde hair. The one and only Homelander walks up beside the two of you. It was almost humbling to be standing before the leader of the seven. He was so powerful- they both were and you were nothing short of ordinary.

"This is a closed set,"

Maeve didn't seem to know what to say exactly so you take it upon yourself to introduce yourself to him as her friend. Although you weren't even sure you could call yourself that at this point. It was a complicated relationship and considering you had broken up, it was the most appropriate label.

"Oh, She has never mentioned you,"

You're about to answer when Maeve takes your arm abruptly and pulls you away from the man. "Will you give us a second,"

A little confused, you give him a little wave goodbye paired with an awkward little smile. His eyes seem to trail after you but you think nothing of it.

"He's taller than expected," You muse aloud as attention falls back to your ex-girlfriend. Arms crossed over her chest and with a less than favourable expression on her face, it's pretty clear she isn't happy. Now she knows what it's like to have an ex show up unannounced.

"What do you want?" Maeve whisper yells at you. "I'm a little busy."

"I know just..." A quick glance to Homelander who had returned to his adoring fans. He had superhearing so you were pretty sure he could still hear you anyway. "after the other night I wanted to make sure you were okay."

"I'm fine."

"If everything was fine you wouldn't show up on my doorstep." A casual shrug of your shoulders. Maeve may be able to fake a smile for the cameras but it was always pretty obvious to you when she was lying to you.

"I said I'm fine. You need to leave."

"Maeve," A soft sigh leaves your lips and you take her hand in yours; brushing your thumb over the back of her hand. "You can talk to me."

"Leave," She growls, pulling her hand away. "Please."

"We need to talk about the other night- you at least owe me that."

With a deep breath, Maeve turns on her heel and begins to walk away. "I'm busy,"

For a moment you just watched her walk away then jogged after her. "Then we can talk later- you could come by tonight? I'll even make dinner."

"Fine. Now leave."

This time you let her walk away and continue making her little advertisement. You wouldn't admit to her that you stuck around a little longer. Even got a chance to talk to Homelander a little before heading home. Chill dude, if not a little intimidating. Maybe it had been a stupid idea to invite your ex-girlfriend over for dinner but you wanted to get to the bottom of all this. You were actually a little nervous for her to arrive. Cooking had never been your specialty but you wanted everything to be perfect. A quick stop on the way home to buy groceries, you worked on dinner since getting home. pacing around as you waited for her to arrive. And waited. And waited. and waited. Lucky for the uneasy feeling that had settled in your stomach, Maeve didn't show up. It probably should have been expected. She had never been the most reliable person unless she was saving the world apparently.

A loud bang has you stirring awake before the sun. It was probably just the neighbours; a loud groan as you bury your face into the covers to go back to sleep. But the banging doesn't stop and you soon realise it's your door. Rolling over, you check your phone to see it's four in the morning. What could anyone want at this time in the morning? Dragging yourself from under the protection of the duvet, you cautiously head to the door. Peaking through the peephole to see... Queen Maeve. "Just give me a chance."

A chance? You weren't sure she deserved any more of those but you still unlock the door and pull it open. Glancing over her as she offers up a smile. Does she ever wear anything other than her armour? "Chances comes after nine am." You protest putting what little strength you had into trying to close the door. It was effortless on her end to keep it open.

"You invited me over, remember?"

"I invited you over for dinner, Maeve. No sane person has dinner at four in the morning."

"I forgot I had a team-up with Black Noir- Just let me in."

With a defeated sigh, you step aside and retire to the couch. Slumped down against the cushions, your head falls back as your eyes flutter closed. The click of your door infers she follows you inside.

"Tired?"

"Mhmm." You hum, nodding nonchalantly.

"Do you want me to make you some coffee?" Maeve suggests and again, you nod. She was familiar with the apartment so she knew where everything was but it still felt a little odd to have her wandering around with such familiarity. Who just shows up this early for a serious talk? A silence comes between the two of you. She may have attempted to keep the conversation going in between asking if you wanted coffee and delivering it to you but you didn't notice. Sitting up as a hand is gently placed against your shoulder, she hands over a large mug.

Blowing gently over the top before you take a tentative sip; warmth radiated from the liquid as it slips down your throat. Maeve joins you, perching on the edge of the couch as if she was ready to leave again. Maybe she was now regretting her decision to visit. You were kind of regretting opening the door instead of just going back to sleep instead. Since you were up anyway, might as well make the most of it.

"I can- I can make you breakfast or something if you want? Since you... missed dinner."

"Oh great, yeah," Maeve responds.

"What would you like? Cereal, toast, pancakes maybe?"

"Pancakes would be great." Of course, they would. She had to pick the option that required the most effort. You didn't mind making her something as much as you just didn't want to get up.

"Alright just... give me a moment to wake up."

"You won't wake up if you keep trying to go back to sleep," A snarky remark that earned her a small smile, your middle finger shoots up in response. The two of you just sit in silence together and every few seconds or so you'd take a sip of the coffee she made. It was all feeling a little awkward. Placing the mug down on the coffee table, you rise and get started on making breakfast. Maeve moves from the couch to the kitchen table, fiddling with the little salt and pepper shakers that always resided there. You don't know what to say and clearly, neither does she.

"So... how are things?" You question as you whisk the mixture together.

"I'm fine, I guess" She shrugs a little. You can't help but sigh a little. "What?"

"Nothing," you insist, grabbing the frying pan and place it over a medium heat; Adding a blob of butter and some oil. "If you don't want to talk Maeve then why did you bother to come over?"

Placing down the salt and pepper shaker with a clink, her attention falls to you. "because you asked."

"Yeah, I asked to talk about the other night. You were clearly messed up."

"Why is it so hard to believe I was just looking to fuck?" It was really hard to believe but rather that you just knew it wasn't true. You were pretty sure Maeve had her choice of partners should she require one. So why come to your door?

"Because I'm not stupid" You pour the mixture into the pan with a satisfying sizzle. "I know you well enough to know that's bull."

"Maybe you don't know me as well as you thought."

Flipping the pancake over, you're taken back by her comment. Did you know Maeve as well as you thought? You had never expected her to just up and leave you one day and she did? She lived an entire superhero life that you knew nothing about. Maeve had always been pretty private when it came to that side of herself. You make another couple of pancakes before serving her up a plate.

"You aren't eating?"

"Too early," you return, taking up the seat opposite her. You watch as her fork pierce the surface of the pancake, cutting off a small piece and pop it into her mouth.

"Taste okay?"

"They're good," Mouth hidden behind the palm of her hand as she mumbled through her food. It lowered a moment later. "I came over because my job is hard. I was the in the area, I was having a tough day."

"A tough day?" Getting any sort of details out of her was like pulling teeth. Why was she so reluctant to speak to you? If she didn't want to have this conversation she should have just no turned up like she hadn't for dinner. Would have saved the effort and you could be sleeping right now.

"Yeah,"

"That's that then." Hands slap against the table as you rise from the seat. No point in sticking around if this wasn't going anywhere. "Case closed. When you're finished just leave the plate in the sink, I'm going back to bed."

"Seriously?"

"You woke me up at four am just to tell me you had a bad day. Shit, I have plenty of bad days, I don't show up at Vought tower." You start walking back towards your bedroom although your slow, hesitant even like you were just waiting for an excuse to turn back.

"I really was having a bad day," she repeats. "Really bad. And all I could think about was seeing you." And getting drunk, guess she just conveniently forgot about that part. There were many moments although brief where you were having a hard time and you thought about going to see Maeve. She used to be such a big part of your life it was almost an instinct to return to her for comfort. You never actually did obviously. As pathetic as her explanation was, it brought you back to the dining table. "Can I ask you something?"

"Depends."

"What's the worst thing you could ever imagine?"

"Huh?" What kind of question was that?

"Just answer it,"

Your mouth opens but no answer comes to mind at all. You were more curious about the reason behind it. It's too early for philosophical debates and it had nothing to do with anything you had been talking about. "uh, I don't know... post-apocalyptic zombie invasion, maybe?"

"Can you take this seriously?"

"I am," you huff. It was a stupid question anyway. "Zombies-"

"really freak you out, I remember." Strange thing to remember. It couldn't have come up in conversation often. It was a little funny the small things people remembered about each other. "I meant something that could actually happen though. I've seen some pretty fucked up shit."

"Like what?" She turns to you like she's about to say something but quickly stops herself. Continuing the eat the breakfast you so lovingly prepared. With the way she had been playing with her food, you suspected she no longer wanted it despite having hardly eaten any.

"Being a hero isn't all it's cracked up to be. Sometimes I wish I could just live a normal life or whatever"

"Nothing glamorous about a normal life," You stifle a yawn. "I think I'd rather be adored by millions and save the day but we aren't all lucky enough to have powers."

"Lucky," A bitter laugh. "I wouldn't call myself lucky."

"You're being so weird." You comment, a quirked brow.

"I would rather be adored by one person who truly means it."

"Guess that's all anyone wants. Supe or not."

Her eyes meet yours for a few seconds before dropping. Did she mean you? There was no doubt you had feelings for the woman and very much still did. But you can't imagine it's anything compared to the weirdos who worship the ground she walks on. They obviously didn't really know her and vice versa but still. There was an element of pureness that came with being so dedicated to someone. "You never answered my question."

"I don't know Maeve it's too early..." You grumble. "Do you want me to say something like war or famine or something?"

"Not unless it's the truth."

Everyone wished for world peace. Everyone wanted to feed the hungry. House the homeless. Basic answers that any decent person would come up with. It lacked originality. It lacked feeling. Everyone would probably have a more personal reason."What's yours?"

"Something happening to you... because of me."

"Really? That's the worst thing you can think of?" Didn't she just say she had seen a lot of messed up stuff and yet her concern resided with you? What did she think would happen? And didn't a broken heart technically count as something happening because of her? Shifting in your seat, you lean down onto the table before you. Thinking of your own answer. The worst thing you could imagine?

"I answered," she shrugs but doesn't elaborate. "Now you go."

"I guess... finding out you died," Should you admit something like that? "You're the strongest person I know. I still... care for you. I'm not sure I would handle it well- Is that a better answer?"

"It's sufficient."

"Sufficient? I really don't know what you want from me Maeve? I don't know what the worst thing is, okay? I'm too tired for this shit."

She places her cutlery carefully on the plate, pushing out her seat. "I should go."

"Maeve?"

"I'll go, you can go back to bed. I don't even know why I came here."

"No. Stay. I wanna talk."

" Let's just forget this ever happened." Brushing herself off, Maeve heads back towards the door. This whole back and forth was growing awfully tiresome. Every time you thought you scratched the surface of her mask, there was a new layer underneath more impenetrable than the last. Maybe you should just let her go? It'd be easier. It was probably for the best too but when she had shown up at your door the other night, you realised just how much you still wanted this. Still wanted her. She may have left you one day without any explanation but seeing her for the first time in a long time had brushed all rational thought aside. You were in love with her even now. Tears brimmed your eyes whether it was due to tiredness or a flush of emotions, it was unclear.

"If you walk out that door I'm done," You declare as confidently as you can. Hoping your sadness was hidden amongst the dim light that filled the entire room. "Don't bother showing up on my doorstep when you have a shitty day." Maeve pauses with her hand on the doorknob but only for a second before twisting the handle and pulling open the door. "Maeve... just tell me what's going on with you, please."

"Everything I have done to you was to protect you." Final words as she leaves. The door clicking behind her. To protect you? From what? What was she even talking about anymore. Anger bubbles deep inside you and you find yourself charging after her. Bursting out into the chilly hallway, you catch her in the corner of your eye. She was leaning against the wall just outside your apartment basking in the flicker of the corridor light.

"Protect me from what?" You wonder quietly, taking a wary step closer. "I don't understand."

"...Homelander." Voice but a whisper mumbled into the darkness. Homelander? The Homelander? Why would you need protection from him, you didn't even know him? Plus he was like a beloved superhero and the last time you checked, superheroes were the good guys.

"You're scared of... the world's greatest superhero?"

"Never meet your heroes."

"Aren't you two like friends? You even dated him. Why are you scared of him?" Another step closer, you lay your hand tenderly on her shoulder. An attempt to support her even if you didn't understand the situation. "He didn't seem so bad when I met him yesterday. I actually spoke with him after."

"You spoke after? Why?" Maeve snarled swiftly making you back away a little only for her hand to snap around your wrist. Cold fingertips apply a deep pressure to your skin as if it's taking everything in her not to press harder. You swallow hard, confused by her anger. "I told you to leave"

"It- it's not a big deal. He just wanted to know more about us," Even you can hear the panic in your voice as you struggle to get the words out. It was a little embarrassing, to say the least, but you'd never really experienced this side of Maeve before. Her anger had never really been directed towards you.

"And you told him?"

"Yeah. He took it pretty well actually, I was surprised. "

"How can you be so fucking stupid?" Her grasp begins to stiffen around your wrist. Maeve was strong, inhumanly so. If she wanted to she could break every one of your bones like it was nothing. That never used to bother you so much but in this instance, your own weakness had never been more apparent.

"Maeve," You struggle against her grip, a pleading look as you meet the brown of her eyes. "...You're scaring me,"

Those magic words seemed to break the spell that had come over her and Maeve released you in an instant. Regret washing off her face in record time. "I'm sorry, okay- I'm sorry," You take a step back; the other hand rubbing at the wrist she just let go off. "I didn't mean to- I wouldn't hurt you."

"I... let's just go back inside." It's hard to pretend that didn't just happen. That Maeve didn't almost crush your wrist for doing the wrong thing. But it wasn't her fault, right? She just isn't herself at the moment. Her emotions got the best of her when she found out you told Homelander about your relationship. Warily, you hold out your hand in offering. It's a little shakey but you just hope she doesn't notice as she takes your hand and you lead the way back into your apartment. Shutting the door behind the two of you, you return to the couch. Sat on either ends so you're as far away as possible without being on the floor, things are feeling a little awkward now. You can't help but focus on your wrist, the feeling of her hand still lingers in a ghostly embrace. "I'm sorry I told Homelander about us."

"You didn't know..."Maeve lets out a heavy sigh as she turns to face you. "Homelander is a monster. He's hurt people just for looking at me funny- "

"Oh." A little surprising to hear. You had always kind of suspected Homelander was a bit of an arsehole but not that he was inherently a bad person. He saves people after all. You've seen him save people. He was basically on the news every other day or in the newspaper or trending on Twitter. There was no evidence to supporting Maeve's theory but you also had no reason not to trust her. She had no reason to lie to you.

"He's done atrocious things. He's made me do atrocious things. I was trying to protect you from him- and from myself,"

"...Why are you telling me this now?" Couldn't she have just told you all this from the beginning? It still didn't explain why she had just shown up the other day either? Clearly, something had happened between her and Homelander at least that's what you gathered from the context.

"To keep you safe," Maeve returns. "So you'll stop hating me."

"I could never hate you," An offer of a faint smile that may or may not betray you. When she had first left you, you were so filled with hatred but it was so hard to stay angry at her. You didn't hate her anymore but you couldn't say you were simply over it now. "It's not your fault."

"It is though- I put you in this situation. I let those people die,"

"What are you talking about? What people?" Every time Maeve opened her mouth you grew slightly more confused and you didn't know how to help. Watching her with an inquisitive eye, you notice as a tear or two begins to glide down her rose-tinted cheeks. It was enough to bring your walls crashing down. Whatever she was talking about must be really affecting her for her to start crying. A hand reaches out only to pull back as you remember what happened last time. You take a deep breath, sitting up a little straighter.

"I should have stood up to him but I was scared."

"Scared of Homelander," You repeat. Still trying to process the information.

"I don't want to be a monster like him." Against your better judgement, this time you shuffle closer and entice her into a soothing hug. Holding onto her tightly like you never wanted to let go because frankly, you didn't. Maeve was warm, she was safe. You wanted to offer her that same sense of comfort even if it was impossible. You wanted to drown in her affection.

"You're not a monster, Maeve" The other woman melts into your caring touch, burying her face in the crook of your neck. You were so used to confident, super-strong Maeve that it was a little weird to have her be so vulnerable. Especially sober. But even your words weren't enough to trick your brain into quelling that twinge of fear that now resides in you. "Whatever's going on, I'm gonna help you get through it. I promise."

#the boys #Queen Maeve #queen maeve x reader #queen maeve imagine #dominique mcelligott

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sporadiclilbook · 4 years ago

Note

May I request some hcs of Dimitri and a caring! Reader please? like they think he's just their friend and is looking out for him? Like sending him food, asking if he's okay and all that stuff, only because he saved their life.

Sure can anon! I hope you like this

Yan!Dimitri x Caring!reader

Pre-TS

Let's just say, as a fellow Blue Lions student, he saved you during a mission.

Immediately you started to feel like you owed him a favour. Even though he said he's just looking out for his fellow student, and in a way, his citizen. So you decided to become sorta like his unofficial retainer. Kinda like Dedue but without the fighting.

You started to notice how he is tense all the time. So you started to ask everyday how is he doing. It's a simple and small gesture but he's glad that someone cares for him. Especially when that someone is you.

Whenever he had his headaches, you would fetch him some remedy from Professor Manuela and when the whole Flame Emperor thing happened you were there to listen to him.

Were it not for you, those voices in his head would've made him go insane so early. With all of the things he went through, your presence felt like a saving grace from the Goddess.

Felix, knowing how unhinged he is, warns you to not get too close to the boar prince. You brushed it off as Felix being rude as usual but that was your mistake.

You've became one of the people Dimitri care about. With everyone that he has lost, he can't even bear the thought of losing you. He wants to be with you. Or to be clearer, he's a fool in love for you.

But one day he hear Sylvain talking to you during training. He was ready to belittle Sylvain for disturbing you during time when he shouldn't but he can't help but eavesdrop a bit.

"So, (Y/N), you and your highness?"

"What? Sylvain, no! I only see him as a friend...."

"Then why are you so caring for him? Making sure he's okay and everything....Come on there has to be something."

"Because he saved my life and I intend to return the favour Sylvain! It's the least I can do."

Hearing this made him quite sad. You only saw him as a friend. A friend that saved your life. He wanted to be more than that! He wanted to be the one you love and cherish. To be the one by your side for as long as time allows it. Because you're the only one who can tame this beastful thoughts of his.

But he's not easily deterred. He will not give up until he has you. He will do whatever he can. He'll slowly spend more time with you, guilt tripping you a bit in the process. You wouldn't want to abandon him, right? Do you not feel grateful for the time he saved you?

He's even more protective of you in the battle. Dedue has been at his side but now he also has you. You try your best to help him and in turn he tries harder to protect you. Quite easy with his inhuman strength. Your kind-caring heart is no place for such a morbid atmosphere.

Your fellow Blue Lions are.....quite amused at his blatant crush. They'll try to tell you (Except Felix, he's the only correct one telling you to keep your distance) that he clearly has a thing for you but your answer remains the same, you only saw him as a friend. But soon enough, he'll change your mind.

"Thank you for staying by my side. I can't possibly imagine a life without you."

Post-TS below (Azure Moon spoilers)

Ah, this is where things gets more awry. With his sanity barely intact and the war going ablaze across Fódlan, he can't help but descend further. One of the thing that was still pounding some sense into him into staying alive was the fact you were possibly still out there. He won't believe you're dead until he saw your own rotting corpse.

But as the 5 years slowly goes by he can't help but think you're dead. Because he wasn't there for you. Too weak. Too late. Your voice haunts him. In his sleepless nights he kept muttering apologies to the ones that was dead, especially to you.

"Where were you Dimitri?"

"My path ended....because of her...

you know what you must do, don't you?"

"Avenge my death.....spill Edelgard's blood."

"Of course (Y/N), anything....for you...my beloved."

After the resurface of Professor Byleth he was hellbent on making Edelgard pay for your 'death'. Even if it's the last thing he does. But it all changed when all of his classmates reunited. He felt his dead heart twitch at the sight of you. Alive and well.

After disposing of the vermins that plagued the monastery, suffice to say he was quite scared to meet you again. He's a monster covered in blood but you were still ever the same caring person you were once was.

But you approached him anyway, worried about his well-being. He wanted to tell you to go away but he seems to be unable to say it. The words was stuck in his throat. He missed your benevolence so much.

He allowed you to continue as normal. Bringing him food, checking in on him. Honestly, Professor Byleth was grateful to have you around. The man won't budge at all from his sulkings but he seems to listen to you a bit. Even managing to drag him to the dining hall sometimes.

Back then he's afraid of showing his ruthless side but now he's basically putting it on display. His enemies crushed. Your assailants obliterated. He wanted to show you that he was capable of protecting you. Of course you were quite shocked at the display of his monstrous strength but it was war. And yet you can't help but feel sorry for the enemies who were unfortunate enough to cross his path.

But with time he slowly started to heal. After the death of Rodrigue, he becomes less bloodthirsty. Even more so with the return of Dedue (unless you didn't do the Duscur Paralogue). After finally taking down Edelgard, he can finally confess. And he won't take a no.

Courting after gruelling war isn't really the best time so he'll take it slow. Until the moment when he confessed, you will have no other choice but to accept. Even if you deny it.

You still saw him as a friend until today? What about those memories of you fighting together? The moments where you cared for him and when he protected you? Please just love him.

You better not love anyone else because they will end up dead somewhere. If you still reject, albeit with a different reason, he will still try.

Oh, it's because he's a royalty and you're a commoner? Fret not he's the King of Faerghus now, YOUR king. The people can't disobey him now.

Hm? You're from a small noble house? Then perfect! None will ask why he wants to marry you, it'll go smoothly.

Aside from that, the amount of PEER PRESSURE of people telling that you two does look good together is also one of the factor. Can't you see the king is in love with you? Surely you don't want to break his poor heart! He's been through a lot you know.

In the end, no matter what, you will end up marrying him. But he won't let you out of the castle ground at all. He's afraid that something might happen to you. At least you can still enjoy a fresh breath of air in the gardens even if there was some handpicked guards watching you.

You were his everything. You were his fuel to live on. He's not the very best with affection but he loved to hold you close to him. It gave him some reassurance that he didn't fail to save you. The Goddess gave him a second chance and he swore not to failed it.

"I'm glad you're here with me, my beloved."

#sporadicpage #yandere x reader #yandere fire emblem three houses #yandere fe3h #yandere dimitri #yandere dimitri alexandre blaiddyd

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bookcalanthedaily · 3 years ago

Text

okay so what’s up with geralt and calanthe? why do i ship them, why do i love them so much, and a little bit about how i believe them to be the book example of courtly love.

okay so let me start with the fact i read the books for the first time back in 2012, no spoilers, no previous knowledge whatsoever and up until the point where calanthe’s death was announced in sword of destiny, i believed, or maybe hoped, that they would end up together.

it started during the feat in a question of price, with their obvious flirting and how geralt seemed to be mesmerized by calanthe. the way I see it, the narrator sees the world with geralt’s eyes, and the way calanthe is described is truly like nothing else. There aren’t any words that directly describe her as beautiful or sexually appealing, no description of her breasts or otherwise her body (which I feel is weird for sapkowski??) . She is described in ways that in a very unobvious way show her grace, her dignity, the aura that she has around her. but despite that there are, still, a few moments that obviously point to geralt’s attraction to calanthe;

‘But hasn't fascination with my beauty and charming personality clouded your judgement?‘ ‘So I'm honoured and proud to be sitting by Queen Calanthe of Cintra, whose beauty is surpassed only by her wisdom.’ ‘Very well,' said the witcher. 'I ask for your green sash, Calanthe. May it always remind me of the colour of the eyes of the most beautiful queen I have ever known.'

so it is obvious that the lack of more obvious descriptions of her beauty isn’t caused by her, well, not beaing beautiful, but rather because the physical aspect of her appeal is the less important one.

she not only invited geralt to her table. she sat him on her righthand side and treated him like a human being, not a mutant. she is the first character in the books to have this sentiment;

'It's true,' said Calanthe. 'Geralt, present here, is a witcher. His trade is worthy of respect and esteem. He has sacrificed himself to protect us from monsters and nightmares born in the night, those sent by powers ominous and harmful to man. He kills the horrors and monsters that await us in the forests and ravines. And those which have the audacity to enter our dwellings.'

and ever since that feast, geralt is known as the witcher whom even kings invited to their tables, just because calanthe was kind enough to do it.

after that, geralt dreams about her not once, but twice.

dream 1:

"A bower, warmth, the scent of flowers, the intense, monotonous hum of bees. He, alone, on his knees, giving a rose to a woman with mousy locks spilling from beneath a narrow, gold band. Rings set with emeralds–large, green cabochons–on the fingers taking the rose from his hand. ‘Return here,’ the woman said. ‘Return here, should you change your mind. Your destiny will be waiting.’ I shall never return here, he thought. I never… went back there. I never returned to… Whither? Mousy hair. Green eyes."

this is basically geralt reliving calanthe’s invitation for him to return to cintra, or even stay in cintra, if that was his wish. he never returned, and when he did want to return, it was too late.

dream 2:

‘There is no destiny,’ his own voice. ‘There is none. None. It does not exist. The only thing that everyone is destined for is death.’ ‘That is the truth,’ says the woman with the mousy hair and the mysterious smile. ‘That is the truth, Geralt.’ The woman is wearing a silvery suit of armour, bloody, dented and punctured by the points of pikes or halberds. Blood drips in a thin stream from the corner of her mysteriously and hideously smiling mouth. ‘You sneer at destiny,’ she says, still smiling. ‘You sneer at it, trifle with it. The sword of destiny has two blades. You are one of them. Is the second… death? But it is we who die, die because of you. Death cannot catch up with you, so it must settle for us. Death dogs your footsteps, White Wolf. But others die. Because of you. Do you remember me?’ ‘Ca… Calanthe!’ ‘You can save him,’ the voice of Eithné, from behind the curtain of smoke. ‘You can save him, Child of the Elder Blood. Before he plunges into the nothingness which he has come to love. Into the black forest which has no end.’ Eyes, as green as spring grass. A touch. Voices, crying in chorus, incomprehensibly. Faces.

to me, in this dream, calanthe is the physical embodiment of geralt’s guilt. of his belief that calanthe, pavetta and perhaps the entire cintra were hurt because he refused to face destiny. there is also the mysterious sentence from eithne;

“You can save him, Child of the Elder Blood. Before he plunges into the nothingness which he has come to love. Into the black forest which has no end.”

and while some might say that she was saying it to ciri... ciri is not present even for a moment during that sequence.

and finally, there is their farewell moment;

He looked into her glaring green eyes. She smiled. He could not decipher the smile.

There was a rosebush growing beside the summerhouse. He broke a stem and picked a flower, kneeled down, and proffered it to her, holding it in both hands, head bowed. ‘Pity I didn’t meet you earlier, White Hair,’ she murmured, taking the rose from his hands. ‘Rise.’ He stood up. ‘Should you change your mind,’ she said, lifting the rose up to her face. ‘Should you decide… Come back to Cintra. I shall be waiting. And your destiny will also be waiting. Perhaps not forever, but certainly for some time longer.’ ‘Farewell, Calanthe.’ ‘Farewell, Witcher. Look after yourself. I have… A moment ago I had a foreboding… A curious foreboding… that this is the last time I shall see you.’ ‘Farewell, O Queen.’

and to me, this is one of the most romantic scenes in the entire series. the way she brings the offered flower to her face, the words ‘pity i didn’t meet you earlier’ and how he cuts her off with a simple ‘farewell’, because thinking of what they could have been hurts too much.

and finally, his reacion to her death, where dandelion had to cut his story in half, stop mid-sentences to make sure he was fine.

in conclusion, i believe that geralt loved calanthe. perhaps she was even his first love, before he met yennefer. but he was a witcher, a mutant, and she was a queen. and he did not believe he deserved her, he did not believe he deserved being ‘saved from the darkness he has come to love’.

now, how does it tie in with the idea of courtly love?

courtly love is a highly conventionalized medieval tradition of love between a knight and a married noblewoman, first developed by the troubadours of southern France and extensively employed in European literature of the time. The love of the knight for his lady was regarded as an ennobling passion and the relationship was typically unconsummated.

and i personally believe calanthe and geralt check all of these boxes. geralt is a knight/warrior who falls in loce with a married noblewoman but that love never gets to be consummated. but, in the end, that love does ennoble him.

he goes from

'Duny,' said Geralt seriously, 'Calanthe, Pavetta. And you, righteous knight Tuirseach, future king of Cintra. In order to become a witcher, you have to be born in the shadow of destiny, and very few are born like that. That's why there are so few of us. We're growing old, dying, without anyone to pass our knowledge, our gifts, on to. We lack successors. And this world is full of Evil which waits for the day none of us are left.' 'Geralt,' whispered Calanthe.

‘I wouldn’t take the child. I couldn’t assume the responsibility. I wouldn’t agree to burden you with it. I wouldn’t want the child to tell you one day… As I’m telling you—’

and it is my belief, that her remarks, such as this;

‘I’ve pondered long over this,’ Calanthe continued, now without a smile. ‘And I’ve come to the conclusion that the selection of the children at the stage of the Choice has scant significance. What difference does it make, in the end, Geralt, which child dies or goes insane, stuffed full of narcotics? What difference does it make whose brain bursts from hallucinations, whose eyes rupture and gush forth, instead of becoming cats’ eyes? What difference does it make whether the child destiny chose or an utterly chance one dies in its own blood and puke? Answer me.’

were a part of what made him change his mind. geralt ends up, even after calanthe’s death, becoming very close to ciri, learning through her that neutrality that had been beaten into him as a young witcher in training was not the way to go. calanthe, and through calanthe also ciri, had a huge impact on geralt’s entire character

so, all in all, this is how i see it. a love, that was never meant to be. and whether you choose to see it as a platonic-friendship type of love or, like me, as romantic love - calanthe’s impact on geralt’s growth is undeniable.

#the witcher meta #rant #calanthe of cintra #geralt of rivia #geralt x calanthe #calanthe x geralt #calalt #courtly love

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i-drink-and-i-write-fics · 3 years ago

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Dragon Queen

Chapter 10: Long Live The Queen

Summary: Your family finally gets their happy ending.

Notes: Thank you all for joining me on my Blood of the Dragon series! Not sure if there will be a part 3, so for now I will keep the series as incomplete on AO3.

Just when you thought your nerves were at their highest point during momentous events in your life, your body proves you wrong. The day had finally come for your coronation and you couldn’t even believe that this is where your life had lead you.

When you were a little girl - long before the X-Gene reared its ugly head - you had a basic idea of how your life was going to go. There had been a career you had picked (even if it wasn’t a realistic one at the age of seven), a place you wanted to live, and how you wanted a princess wedding (you blamed all those Disney movies you had grown up on). But then your life took a turn for the worst when your eyes slowly turned red. And then the nubs for your wings began to push through. Before at last, your tail bone extended outward into an actual tail. That’s when your parents dumped you on the street before the rest of your physical changes could take place.

And now....now you were looking at becoming Queen of New Asgard. You were a former Avenger and Thor’s wife. If only your parents could see you now.

Well, they had tried to, anyway. And it went as well as one could imagine. You don’t even know how they found you. It was shortly before you were pregnant before Thor had even thought of marrying you. Both of you were taking vacation time from the Avengers in Iceland, visiting sites from the show that had been made from the books you and Thor had bonded over.

The ice-covered lands had been beautiful and your naturally high body heat kept you warm even during the snowstorms. Thor looked so handsome covered in fur from an animal that had roamed his home planet. Both of you dining out on a patio of a local establishment, the wine flowing and laughter filling the air. Until two people who looked vaguely familiar came running up to your table.

“____! There you are! We have looked everywhere for you!” The woman cried, though, her tears didn’t seem genuine.

The man smiled at you, but it didn’t reach his eyes and seemed rather creepy. “You’ve grown into such a fine young woman. Just look at those wings! Who knew they would get so big?”

You shrank back in your chair when the woman tried to hug you and Thor got in between.

“Forgive us, but do we know you?”

“Oh, you must be Thor!” The man went to shake his hand, but Thor just crossed his arms. “Uh, we’re ___ parents. And we’ve missed her so much!”

Your eyes had gone wide at these words, instantly recognizing the pair in front of Thor. Of course, you saw it now. The woman had your eyes before they had changed. The man your color of hair. Both carried themselves in a similar manner. But there was something off. The woman couldn’t look at your eyes, choosing to focus on your nose so it still looked like she was looking you in the face. The man kept his eyes on your wings, only occasionally sparing a glance at Thor.

“Her parents?” Thor’s voice became colder with each word. “The very ones that threw her out into the street when she was only a child? That left her to be scooped up by Hydra and used as a weapon? All because she couldn’t control that she was a mutant?!”

The woman backed up to her husband, her eyes now on Thor. “That’s no way to speak to us! We are her parents.”

You finally found your voice. “I don’t have any parents. Any ones I did have, lost the right to call themselves as such the moments they refused to act as such.”

Your dad tried to take a firm voice with you. “Now, ____. That’s no way to speak to us. We have been worried sick.”

“Have you?!” You rose to your feet and your wings spread out slightly behind you. “Because the last I remember was you-” you pointed at your father “tossing me into the street while you-” now you gestured at your mother “screamed that such an abomination would not be allowed under your roof. So as far as I’m concerned, my direct family consists of Thor and Loki, of the Avengers, and the X-Men. Those who stood by my side, who saw past my mutation. You only come to me now as I have risen above my past and become a hero. I will not let you back in just so you can use me for my fame.”

“A hero?” Your father sneered. “You just found a place with other freaks.”

“ENOUGH.” Thor’s words carried over the restaurant and now everyone was focused on your table. “You will leave my presence now and never try to contact ____ again.”

As if to emphasize his words, lightning crashed behind him. Your parents took one last look at you, before fleeing for their lives. That night, old wounds had been ripped open and Thor did his best to comfort you.

That night, you knew without a doubt that Thor Odinson was the one for you.

And now, here you were, married to him and a mother of his twins. Awaiting your coronation to become queen of his people. It was better than any childhood dream.

“Are you almost ready, my love?” Thor poked his head into the room, seeing you struggle to zip up your dress.

“Almost….got...it,” you grunted as you tried to reach around your wings.

“Here, allow me.” Thor reached over and zipped the dress up with ease.

You turned around to plant a kiss on your husband. “Thank you, my love. Are the twins ready?”

“Ready and playing with Loki.”

“I hope not with his daggers again.”

“No, he promised no more of those until they were old enough to learn proper safety.”

“Somehow that doesn’t put my mind at ease.” You playfully rolled your eyes. “So? How do I look?”

Thor took in the floor-length gown that was deep red with black lace over the bodice and bell, matching your wings and eyes. Your tail twitched nervously behind you.

“You look amazing as always, my Queen.”

“I’m no queen.”

“Not yet. Just a couple more hours.”

And that brought back your nerves. “Are you sure about this? It’s not too late to change your mind.”

Thor chuckled as he kissed the top of your head. “You will do fine, I promise.”

While you tried to always believe Thor when he showered you with compliments and praise, it was still hard to believe you were the best choice for queen. Soon, Thor left to see to the ceremony and you paced your room as you waited.

Hilde poked her head in. “Hey, your grace.”

You couldn’t help but laugh. “Very professional.”

“Eh, I’ll save it for after the ceremony.”

“Save it for public appearances only,” you laughed again.

“So….should I even ask if you are ready?” Your face fell and Hilde instantly ran up to hug you. “Hey, hey, it’s alright. You’ll do great!”

“I just worry that-”

Hilde pulled away so she could look you in the face. “If you’re about to say you’re not worthy of Thor or being a queen, I will literally shake the sense into you.”

That made you laugh once more and you hugged her again. “Thanks, Hilde. I guess then I am ready.”

She called a few guards to make a formation around you as you began your long walk to the throne room. And just like Thor’s coronation, your wedding, and the announcement of your twins, your makeshift family of the Avengers and the X-Men were there to watch your new chapter in your life. To support you as they had when they first freed you from Hydra.

The only faces to be missing were your parents and there would never be a moment in your life where you truly would miss them. Need them. Love them.

Next to the dais, Loki held your son while Helena cradled your daughter. Taking a deep breath, you slowly climbed up the steps to the thrones and stood next to Thor, who looked breathtaking in his armor and red cape.

You turned to face the audience, your wings pulled back and your tail draped to line around the edge of your skirt. Smiles across the room greeted you. Thor stepped up next to you before addressing the crowd.

“Nearly seven years ago, the Avengers were called upon to stop a dangerous weapon that Hydra control. It was soon obvious that the truth was worse than that. That Hydra really had a powerful prisoner. Over time I was lucky enough to earn that person’s trust, setting her free from her prison. We fell in love, got engaged, and she gave me two beautiful children. We have had our fair share of ups and downs, and there is no one I would have by my side than her. My fellow Avenger. My wife. My Dragon Queen.”

The crowd erupted in cheers as Thor moved to placed a silver crown atop your head, then moved to stand by your side. As you both held hands, you couldn’t help the tears that came to your eyes.

No, this wasn’t the fairytale life you had pictured when you were a child. This was far better.

Tagging Crew:

Everything

@marvelfansworld

@that-chick212

@keetnerj01

Dragon Queen

@animegirlgeeky

@profoundtyrantharmony

#marvel #marvel cinematic universe #fanfic #fan fic #dragon queen #blood of the dragon series #thor #thor x fem!reader #fem!reader

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mooshs-crack-headcanons · 4 years ago

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How would the DMC brothers (+ V) be with a full demon S/O?

Dante

Demons can have human emotions, Dante knows that better than anyone, he's seen it happen more than once; like devils crying. Demons can learn to love and feel what humans feel, so why should you be any different? Human or not to him it doesn't matter, if he loves you then he loves you and that's it.

But that's not saying that he doesn't find having a demon partner not cool or anything though, the complete opposite of that! It's badass having someone more closer to his level at his side, and deep down it takes away a lot of the stress of having to keep looking over his shoulder to always make sure that a human partner would be safe. With you being a demon and fighting to protect yourself is in your blood, he has nothing to worry about (but still Dante being Dante there's always a tiny bit of worry he keeps hidden away)

He is absolutely blown away at the sight of your devil trigger! His exact word being:

"God damn, baby! And you said my trigger had a great ass?!"

Your sudden clawed hand across his jaw, which in your human form would barely hurt him for a few seconds, stung him for days.

When the rare occasion when no one else is around the shop and customers are guaranteed not to show up during the day Dante lets a bit of his inner demon out and does what normal demon mates do: nesting. Now his bed is not that big, sure it can fit two average human sized people but it struggles to fit two devils. So the two of you, both in trigger (him preferably for your comfort not Sin Trigger) will both squeeze together as comfortably as the two of you can get in bed and just...pet each other. Yeah. It's very common for demon mates to groom each other, not like cats and lick each other (but I mean that's another choice if you want, I'm not judging 👀) but just run your crawled hands up each other and just...take each other in, basically how demons cuddle by feeling each other's power and stuff, it's quite comforting actually.

There have been most definitely instances where the two of you have both been stabbed by the same sword or something

With your demonic blood being more on par with his, Dante can have more of all balls out training sessions, not on the same level as those with Vergil but more than he normally can do with Nero, Lady, or any other more human-like training partners. Training sessions with you are more like those with Trish and Lucia, other demons, and depending on how strong you are possibly even further than that with both of you scrapping and slicing away at each other in the strongest versions of your DT.

Fights are the number one way for demons to calm themselves. So after your (very violent, but somehow friendly and maybe a little flirty?) spars the two of you will faze back into your human forms and flop on the ground (usually the rooftop of Devil May Cry) and lay in each other's arms complementing moves each other did, heads finding their way into chests and hands brushing at whatever previous that were already healed with healing factor before finding yourselves passionately at each other's lips with all the time in the world seemingly meaningless as the two of you lose yourselves for the rest of the night.

Vergil

Vergil is always one who is attracted by strength whether it be physical or mental, so it's no surprise that he would eventually find himself interested in being with a demon partner, he always did find humans to be more complicated anyway.

Like with Dante, Vergil is quite relieved with your instinctive ability to protect yourself so he doesn't have to keep watch over you 24/7, you're perfectly strong to fend for yourself and he 100% respects that.

Of course, given that have demonic power he's going to want to spar with you, that most of his idea of a 'date' anyway knowing him, and you often don't mind given the natural spark that goes through your blood when it comes to a fight. Vergil isn't the one to be mostly focused on looks, although yes he will admit you are very beautiful with your appearance as well, but he finds strength even more beautiful so it's not a surprise that he finds your trigger to be one of the most beautiful things on earth. The very first few spars you had went on for countless hours just because he desperately wanted to learn everything you could do with it and the two of you got some pretty decent bonding out of it as well.

Oh course the whole thing with Mundus is a pretty touchy subject, especially post 5 after him finally in his true and restored self after the whole Nelo Angelo experience and everything that followed it, and with demon having extremely long lifespans the conversation, even before the two of you get together, of where your alliance was is going to come up at some point. Given your status of working alongside Dante and the others at Devil May Cry, the answer should be obvious but to Vergil it means quite a lot to him given that a complete demon such as yourself would be working alongside a bunch of hybrids and humans to defend humanity and defy your master (your master who’d tortured him for decades), just like his father did. He’s heard Trish’s story from bits and pieces she told him as V and the rest Dante shared with him, but your unknown story deeply intrigues him and when you do get around to telling it and how you were hunted down and almost killed hundreds of times for your betrayal for many years I’d like to say that was the point that he truly started to feel a little small something for you.

He also likes watching when you square off against Dante. Since and his brother have much drastic differences in fighting styles and that it makes sense that you if you’re able to properly stand a match against one brother that you’d be able to fight with the other, so he likes watching how differently that you fight against his brother and even takes notice of you pulling off very different things he would’ve never though of doing against him and you even see him doing new moves similar to yours the next time you see the twins fight.

Vergil has always found human emotions...hard to deal with. So on days he’s feeling frustrated, whether it be because of his brother or his attempts to get connected with Nero being unsuccessful, he likes spending time with you in devil trigger either sparring to just being near one another to let his demon calm himself down.

V, like Vergil, finds strength really attractive. So what if you're a demon? To him that matters very little, not too long after the two of you have met has he already found two of Blake's works that you remind him of (You're a fucking dork, V)

Normally demons he has seen and personally been put up against always seem to fight with this feral clumsiness that has no sense of class to it, you on the other hand seem to fight with all the grace in the world with your devil trigger. V feels taken aback and mesmerized everytime he sees it, how you seem to float effortlessly through air like a leaf in the wind as you dodge and repel every attack sent your way. In these little dazes, it's usually Griffon that has to snap him out of it with a very loud: "Okay! Time to wake up Romeo!" That usually almost makes V lose the grip on his cane and fall before Shadow had to rush over and help him not tip over. Whenever this happens V always gets an interesting shade of pink on his face after he's really taken a moment to realize his fawning over you.

Speaking of his familiars, they sure love being around you! Because their master is in head over heels for you? Eh, partly, but most importantly it's because whenever they're around you they get a power boost off your demon energy, which may be because of the type of demon you are, or it just comes from your emotional bond with V, your choice. So expect most times when Griffon and Shadow are out of their tattoos they swarm over to you and cuddle on over next to you, with Griffon sitting in your lap, Shadow laying up against your leg making the occasional biscuit motion on your thigh, and if V has made his place leaning against your side as he reads his book you might hear the occasional pleased sounding rumble of Nightmare from his hair.

V would never keep secrets from his s/o, human or not, I feel that he would tell you ahead of time during 5 what's going to eventually happen to him and with you being a demon and understanding this more than any human would and I feel like that would be an even more sense of comfort and a little less to worry about and the two of you could just focus on the time that's left.

V is fairly fragile, even in human standards, his body can’t take much making him rely mostly on his familiars to do physically hard tasks for him. So with you being a demon that means you’re without a doubt stronger than him meaning not only can you save his ass in moments that not even his contacted demons can help him that much but also you’re going to have to watch your own strength and make sure you don’t accidentally hurt him doing something like holding too tightly on his hand or something.

Like I said before, V is absolutely entranced by the form of your devil trigger and he likes you in the late hours of the night trigger so he can mindlessly trace the rough or soft feeling of your triggered skin as he finally is able to let himself drift off to sleep.

If you like what you read please consider reblogging! It means the world for writers and artists!

#devil may cry #devil may cry x reader #dante x reader #vergil x reader #v x reader #mine #dante sparda #vergil sparda #v dmc

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mcu-fan-fics-blog · 4 years ago

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The Helping Hand

This is a Repost from my Ao3 I wanted to bring it to Tumblr. I hope you like it Its currently 5 chapters I will be uploading the rest throughout the rest of the week.

Word count: 1660 approx

Summary: Y/N Krast Illegitimate Daughter of Tony Stark. Product of an unwanted teen pregnancy. What would Howard Stark be capable of doing to assure his sons future? What will happen when Tony meets our Beautiful, young, genius, rich philanthropist.

Tw: Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Drug use, Drug addiction, Teen Pregnancy. (If there are any I missed please tell me.)

Introduction Ch.1

Ch.2

Back Story

(AU Howard and Maria Stark were not killed by the Winter Soldier.)

Your name is Y/N Krast First Born Daughter of Tony Stark. Sent away by Howard and Maria Stark. You being the result of an unwanted teen pregnancy. You don't know who your mother or father are. Howard Stark secretly kept in contact with you, until he passed.

Howard gave you a comfortable life and a bountiful trust fund that you gained access to on your 18th Birthday also the year he died. You are a Genius having finished college and high school at the same time with a master’s in Computer Engineering with a minor in Biology.

After Howards’ death, you were lost… you decided to help others. Thinking that maybe that would help you feel a semblance of happiness. You went to the one place you knew people needed help Sokovia.

You weren't there for long when you realized that you loved being there. The people and the culture were so welcoming and loving… at least towards you. The people definitely had their reservations, but you didn't mind.

You did as much as you could… you lived a simple life. Gave up the luxury in which you were raised and traded it for a small two-bedroom apartment that you shared with a friend who needed help with the rent. You opened a medical facility it was by no means the best but it could do the job.

You taught people basic medical procedures, not surgery… but everyday accidents and the occasional riot scene. Stitches and patch-up jobs.

"Hey, y/n what do you want me to do with these boxes here?" You look at him confused when you realize what he is holding.

"Umm… just leave them there I want to go through them before I leave." David gives you a fond look as he moves to sit next to you. "It's crazy to hear you say that… It seems like just yesterday you were that fresh-faced kid trying to help people."

You clear your throat as you see where the conversation is heading. "Don't go getting all sentimental on me… not now David." You give David a reassuring smile, but to your luck, he doesn't buy it. Now looking at you more seriously he says "Y/N it’s ok. We all understand why you're leaving, no one is mad or angry, just sad you will be missed around here."

You feel your eyes start to water and you quickly turn away from David trying to hide your tears to no avail. "It's just that I’m going to miss this too." He holds your shoulders and turns you to face him. He holds your face, the tears building in his own eyes, and pulls you into a hug.

"You will always be welcome back, you hear me. Now we are both going to stop crying on the count of 3… and were going to pretend that didn't just happen alright." You nod your head slowly agreeing to the terms you collect yourself. What David and you had is the closest thing either of you had to family. He pulled away slowly but determined.

"Okay, no more sad stuff alright… the town wants to throw you a going-away party. And you can't say no they just want to say goodbye." You sigh a smile slowly forming on your face and agree. After all, it had been two wonderful years in which you found yourself.

You are interrupted when you hear a knock at the door. It was rather startling but you've grown used to it by now. Shortly after the loud bangs, you called knocks you hear the door open and close. "How are my two favorite people in the world doing?"

Vivian or Viv for short. "Just peachy" you reply, hearing her laugh at your snarky reply. "I'm in my room and David went out to get things situated for the party."

"Oh well, I just came here to… well you know say goodbye. You are my best friend and I will not forget what you did for me and for my family."

You walk out of your room wearing black jeans and a leather jacket. "You know I would do it again in a heartbeat." Viv hums disapprovingly trying to play it off buy fails. "You see that's exactly what I'm afraid of. You jumped into that building because you didn't care if you did. As heroic as it might seem it was suicidal and we both know it."

You stumble looking for the words " I umm… I was there's no point in lying, but it's not like that anymore." She nods subtlely but you see it in her eyes she's relieved. You take the "out" and change the subject.

"Come on Viv lighten up it's my last night here and we're missing out on my own party." You nudge her and within seconds you get out of your apartment and into the streets that have seen you grow into the person you now are.

The party was more than you deserved… There were home-cooked meals and homemade desserts. People that you have grown to be acquainted with saying goodbye and wishing you luck. You can't help but thank them all sincerely. Once the party is over you head back home with David taking in the last of your stay here.

Once in your apartment you hesitate but end up calling David to your room. "I don't know if you noticed but I never unpacked this box. It was Howard's stuff." David's eyes open showing his surprise. "The Howard… why didn't you open it."

You sigh not knowing exactly why you didn't "Well we're opening it tonight." You make your way to the box and as if you were a wild animal you ravage the package open not realizing how much you actually wanted to open the box.

As you analyze the things in the box your eyes begin to water. There are pictures and mementos of your greatest moments stored in a single place. There's a picture of when you first met Howard you were 11. You chuckle lightly causing David to Burst out laughing. "I umm… I'm sorry but you were one ugly kid." You playfully slap his arm.

"I was, wasn't I. Howard saved me you know in this picture I had just gotten out of the worst foster home I'd ever been in." You'd never said much about your time in the system so David let you talk. "They would hit us, starve us, and some were even sexually assaulted."

David processes what you had just confessed to him realizing that it's probably not even half of what you've been through. "Howard was my saving grace… I was quite the ugly kid inside and out. I was a kid that had no hope in the world, but Howard changed that."

David collects his thoughts and says "I'd say he did a damn good job you brought hope to everyone here… you know kids here aspire to be like you… you are a great role model." You give him a sincere smile and give him a hug.

"David, I'm going to miss you, but it's time for me to go. Never doubt calling me for anything no matter how big or small. And I hope that you and Viv continue the work in the practice. Also, you know that Viv likes you, give her a chance. I don't want either of you to be alone… be alone together. Also she could help you with the rent of the place." Your say laughing. "Now go to bed and we'll leave early tomorrow."

David chuckles while leaving your room. When you hear his door close you continue looking through the things in the box.

Flashback

"Krast come downstairs there's someone here to see you." You jump up startled and cautiously make your way downstairs. You hear part of a conversation but don't invest yourself. You're too frightened when you get to where you heard voices there is a man standing there.

"Ah, you must be the young Y/N Krast. How are you, I'm Howard." You don't reply but rather look at Mr. Evans who nods ever so slightly giving you your cue. "I’m doing well." He's silent for a moment then continues "I hear you're quite the genius." You simply nod. When Mr. Evans decides to cut in rather tactlessly.

"Well, Mr. Howard is here to take you to a new home." You look at him incredulously then turning to Howard and asking him quite bluntly "Are you adopting me?"

Howard simply says "Not exactly, but you will have a family to care for you." The look in his eyes gives you some reassurance. That same afternoon he took you to "your new home."

You quickly find out what he meant by "Not exactly" while you were living in a better home, you were being raised by employees. Howard would come around every week a couple of times. You both enjoyed each other's company and quickly you grew fond of him.

"Y/N hurry up we're going to be late" Howard yelled "Yup im coming, you know if you'd given more than a couple hours heads up id be ready." Howard only chuckles and let that comment slide. You both knew that was a lie.

End Flashback

The morning went by rather quickly. Now you're on the tarmac waiting for your plane to arrive. David was holding your hand while neither of you mentioned it you could not have been more grateful.

"You go and kill em all. Alright I want to see you in a magazine or something. And don't forget to mention me as the greatest inspiration, your daily motivation, and the drive behind you."

You can only chuckle "Those aren't the words I would use to describe you but you are the best." You jug him and wave him off as you board your plane. You cant help but feel guilty as you're currently lying to everyone you care about, but there's no going back now.

#natasha x y/n #natasha romanoff #reader x avengers #avengers #tony stark #wanda maximoff #pietro maximoff #pepper potts #wanda x reader #steve rogers #fanfic #marvel #chapter

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fics-of-culture · 4 years ago

Text

Nightmares and Angels

Requested by anonymous

Summary: The littlest Winchester has been experiencing hallucinations and nightmares of her brothers covered in blood. Can a certain whiskey eyed angel come to the rescue?

Words: 2,123

Warnings: Blood, Hallucinations, Nightmares. Reader has PTSD. Possible misrepresentation of mental illness. (I personally don’t have many experiences with PTSD or hallucinations so take everything here with a grain of salt.)

It was late. And you found yourself milling around the bunker. Again. Trying to find anything to occupy your time with in order to avoid going back to your room. You were positive that if you went to bed you’d have nightmares. You’d been having them a lot recently. Along with some other... issues that you’d yet to address. Today had been especially difficult for you in that regard. Your older brother Dean had been in the kitchen making dinner when you had another one of your ‘attacks’ as you called them.

“You want bacon on your burger?” Dean turned away from the veggies he’d been chopping to face you. You were seated at the kitchen table, nose buried in a book and just enjoying your brother's company when he had asked. Being caught off guard by the question, you let out a little ‘huh?’ “The burger.” Dean repeated. “You want bacon on it or- Ah shit!” He exclaimed suddenly. You stood from your chair to check on your brother when you saw it. A steady trail of red streamed from his thumb onto the cutting board. Apparently Dean had nicked his finger while he was distracted. You froze in place. Images flashed rapidly before you as Dean grabbed a towel to stop the bleeding. You watched in horror as the blood seeped through the towel. Slowly, it continued to spread until it was running as a steady steam down his arm pooling around his shoes. You took an unsteady step back, priming yourself to run out the door when a pair of fingers snapped in front of you. Dean was staring at you with concern. Hand wrapped in a towel completely devoid of blood. “I said can you get me a bandaid?” Dean asked. Watching you curiously as you stood there. Shaking off your latest trance, you gave Dean a sharp nod before turning to locate your first aid kit.

It wasn’t always like this. Some days were just worse than others. You had gotten so accustomed to seeing your brothers steeped in blood that you had started to see it even when it wasn’t there. Your brothers didn’t know about this. No one did. And you intended to keep it that way. They always looked as though they had the weight of the world on their shoulders and you couldn't bear to stress them out more with your personal problems. You sighed as you wandered into the kitchen. It was empty now. Your brothers had gone to bed hours ago, meaning you could roam around freely without your brothers worrying about why you were up so late. Knowing you’d be awake for a while longer, you decided to brew some coffee. You were pouring yourself a steaming cup of coffee when you heard wings flap behind you.

“Is that for me? Oh sweetheart, you shouldn’t have.” Gabriel speaks in your ear as his arms wrap around you to pull the cup out of your hand. You roll your eyes as you turn to face him. You cross your arms as you stare at the angel who has been your best friend since he’d been ‘brought back to life’. A smug smirk graced his lips as he kept your beverage from you.

“Gabe, that drink does not have nearly enough sugar for it to be for you.” You sass him as you reach out to take your cup back, but he continues to withhold it from you.

“I’ll tell you what, you give me a little sugar right now and you’ll get this drink back.” You cross your arms and groan in annoyance as the mischievous angel taps a finger to his cheek. “Come on hon, one little kiss and I’ll stop buggin’ ya. Besides, I’ve been gone for weeks! Don’t you wanna welcome me home?” It is true that he had been gone for quite a while. He and Cas had been working overtime in heaven trying to keep the lights on. Uncrossing your arms, you sigh in mock defeat as you step closer to give your favorite angel a kiss on the cheek. He lets out a dramatic gasp as you give him a quick peck. You turn your face slightly to hide the blush spreading on your cheeks. If Gabriel notices your sudden bashfulness, he doesn’t say anything.

“You only get a kiss because I did miss you.” You mutter quietly. Gabe gives you a soft, genuine smile. “Now can I have my drink back?” You raise your arms and make little grabby motions with your hands as you wait for Gabe to give your drink back.

“Hell no!” He basically shouts, showing no concern for the other sleeping tenants of the bunker. He swiftly raises his right hand and snaps the coffee out of existence. Your arms fall to your sides as you regard your friend with a look of betrayal. You open your mouth to whine at him before being quickly cut off. “You have any idea what time it is, sugar? You don’t need coffee. You need sleep.”

“You promised you’d give it back.” You said, giving Gabriel your best pout. Maybe your patented Winchester puppy dog eyes would distract the angel from the lateness of the hour.

“Honey.” Gabriel’s voice was suddenly lacking that playful tone from before. “I know you and the rest of the mystery gang are used to burning the midnight oil, but you need to take care of yourself. Are you guys even on a case right now?”

“No.” You muttered quietly. “But!”

“But nothin’ sweetheart. You gotta go to bed. Unless there's something you’re not telling me?” Gabriel had suspected that something had been up with you for a while, but damn if you weren’t a tough cookie to crack. You just huffed out a little sigh before saying goodnight to Gabriel and heading to your room. You were certainly not interested in explaining your lack of sleep to Gabe. You figured that you could probably get away with loading up Netflix on your laptop and staying up a bit longer, but Gabe was right. You desperately needed sleep. Chuck knows you’d been lacking it for the past couple weeks. You resign yourself to your fate as you get ready for bed. Maybe with Gabe in the bunker, the dreams won’t be so bad you think to yourself as your eyes slide closed.

Sam was suddenly woken to the sound of your screams. His bedroom being situated directly across from yours gave him the benefit of being the first one to hear your destress. In less than a second, your brother sprung up from his bed, blankets violently tossed to the side as he rushed toward your room. Once he was in the hall, he shouted once for Dean, but didn’t linger to wait for him. Instead, Sam burst into your room, shotgun in hand. Expecting some sort of intruder, Sam was caught off guard when all he found was you screaming and writhing blindly on your mattress.

“Y/N!” Sam shouted your name as he rushed to your side. Jostling your shoulder in order to wake you, your brother watched in horror as your eyes opened suddenly, falling upon his face. Instead of his presence soothing you as he thought it would, you instead jerked away from his touch and let out a scream of what he could only describe as haunting despair. From your perspective, you weren’t seeing your sweet brother Sammy as you normally would. Instead, you watched as your brother’s face was covered in blood and contorted in anguish. Desperate to get away from this haunting image, you pulled away from his grasp and pinned yourself to the headboard of the bed. As far away from your concerned brother as possible. Vaguely you recognized that he was speaking to you, but you couldn’t pull away from your panic long enough to hear him. All you could do was stare at the blood pouring down his face, repeatedly jerking away from him each time he tried to touch you or otherwise get near you. A few moments later, you were curled into a ball on your bed when the door swung open once more. It was Dean. He stood there staring at you with a worried expression similar to Sam’s, apparently having heard the ruckus you’d made. But you couldn’t focus on that. All you could see was the copious amounts of blood dripping from what appeared to be a stab wound right where his heart was. Just like when Sam approached, you jerked away from Dean when he got near you. You were unable to do anything in this moment other than tremble and sob at the horrific images of your bloodied brothers before you. You truly tried to calm yourself, but nothing seemed to soothe you. And the presence of your brothers were just making your stress worse. You couldn’t get the picture of your blood soaked brothers out of your head. Subconsciously, you desperately cried out to the only being you thought might be able to save you. You didn’t even register the new presence in your room until you felt the bed dip. Your head jerked up, frantically searching for the new intruder when you saw Gabe. He wasn’t covered in blood or half dead. He was just your Gabriel. You let out a little cry of relief when you saw him. Instantly moving to crawl into his lap for comfort.

“Hey hon, what’s going on?” You hear him whisper as he wraps his arms around you. From your spot in his lap, you couldn’t see the confusion and worry on his face as he tried to figure out what was happening.

“I can’t- I can’t make them stop!” Your voice sounds pathetic to you as you speak frantically. Gabe runs his hand through his hair, not entirely sure what to do.

“What’re you talking about? What won’t stop?” His hand falls to your head and he lets his fingers card through your hair as you whimper into his chest.

“The hallucinations! I can’t make them go away.” With your head buried in his chest, you don’t see the grim look Gabriel sends your brothers. Your brothers turn to share a look as if to say ‘Did you know about this?’

“What’re you seeing?” He turns his attention back to you. He kept his voice gentle as he spoke to you, not wanting to spook you more than you already are.

“Sam and Dean. Covered in blood. Oh God make it stop.” The trickster was positive he felt his heart break when you said this. He knew you’d been having some sort of problem that you weren’t sharing with him, but he never imagined it was anything this severe. And according to the shocked looks on your brother’s faces, they hadn’t known either. He sucks in a breath and steadies himself, wanting to be confident for you.

“Look again.” He speaks calmly. And you pull away to look him in the eyes for the first time since he arrived. You let out a little ‘what?’ He’s patient as he speaks to you. “Look at your brothers again. It’ll be okay. I promise.” Hesitantly you do as he says. You turn your head to look at Sam and Dean as they stand helplessly in the corner of your room. Clearly unsure how to help you. To your shock, they looked completely normal. A little ruffled from getting out of bed so suddenly, but they didn’t have a speck of blood on them.

“Ho-how?” You can’t wrap your head around the sudden change.

“A little angel magic. As long as I’m here, you won’t have to worry about those pesky images.” You let out a little sob as you hugged him with renewed vigor. Gabe cuddled into bed with you and when you seemed calm enough, your brothers left the two of you alone. Dean was grumbling a bit about leaving his little sister alone with the trickster but Sam just shoved him out of the room. You were sure that they were going to have a long talk with you tomorrow, but for now they seemed content to just let you relax.

“Gabriel?” He let out a distracted ‘hmm?’ as his fingers continued to comb through your hair.

“Stay with me tonight?” You spoke so quietly that if Gabe hadn’t been an angel, he wasn’t sure he would’ve heard you.

“Anything for you, sweets.” The two of you made your way under the covers. You laid your head on Gabriel’s chest and slowly allowed yourself to succumb to sleep. Knowing that for the first time in months, you would be getting a peaceful sleep.

#spn #spn gabriel #gabriel #gabriel x reader #gabriel imagine #spn gabriel x reader #supernatural #supernatural fic #supernatural reader insert #reader insert #fanfic

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