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normal-internet-user · 1 year ago

Note

As promised, pumpkin pie! (/p) Here's my two cents for our favorite kiddo reader. The heir of Apocalypse!Peepaw Leo. The edgelord (and rightfully so!) turned dork nugget and their kooky adventures because I say so >:3

– ˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚ Adopted Reader Fluff!!! My serve!! (probs a smidgen of angst bc this one specific scenario has been rotating in my head & i definitely meant to include it in the headcanons last night but, as previously mentioned, my eyes felt like they were gonna fall out 🥴) ˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

p.s , I am also listening to the Goofy Movie soundtrack, specifically Stand Out + I 2 I which are my faves!!! Tevin Campbell did not have to go that hard. Highly recommend.

💌🧚‍♀️💗🌨🥡🍥

Even More Reader Post-Movie Headcanons!

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈

Okay so

I really wanna start out with the scenario that I am positively aching to show you bc I really wanna know what you think, ANDDD I think it weaves in so well with the repairing (or rather, building) of Reader and Leo’s relationship in this timeline!

But, we’ll get there. ��

After the events of the movie, everything is still raw. Not only are we recovering from a literal war, but all the issues that come with coping with a timeline that we aren’t used to – a timeline we’ve only heard nostalgic regalings of from Papa, lullabies and tall tales and stories meant to keep up some sort of hope and light in the midst of the darkness they lived in day by day, as well as in the mystic projections of Uncle Michelangelo

. . . but now?

Seeing it in all its prime and modern-day glory?

It’s so, so beautiful.

Reader can’t and would never deny that.

It’s vibrant. It’s colorful. It’s free. It’s such a far cry from the blood-red skies and dilapidated wastelands they grew up with. The ruins were their "sunny skies and rolling fields" so to speak.

Now that they are here. In the flesh?

It’s. A lot to handle.

Reader is wrecked, for sure.

Casey is too! He’s just better at handling– hiding? Coping.

He’s more open and excited and gentle and polite and cheerful and.

We learn a lot from him as time goes on.

#caseythenationaltreasure

I like to imagine that Casey is a really big help in Reader’s journey to peace; not only within and with themself, but with the people around them too.

Eventually,

Sure, it’s still a bit awkward with everyone; you guys are kids from the future stuck in a different timeline - with the people who raised you and they're the same age as y'all! What more could you DO to them? (/lh)

Ah. But they’ve got their family. and it’s no joke that they’re a big help!!

Mikey is in his Prime as Doctor Feelings and scheduled regular sessions with Reader bc his EQ is very sharp, as we all know, and he notices just how bad Reader wants to come to terms with everything, and he wants to help. He does help. A lot.

Donnie is ever the 'tism with the emotional constipation (/aff) but he helps and provides in his own little special Donnie ways!

Even if he may not outright say it all the time, he cares and loves his family so so much and he'd do anything for them.

He sets Reader up with some fun and unique techno-cool gifts that help them with things they don't speak up about;

– – like upgrading their mask to have a panoramic-projection so they can put a whole visual to the audio recordings and playbacks stashed in the device memory (only if they want tho! he won't touch it otherwise :'3)

He pretends like he's not hanging on to Reader's every little word when they do engage in casual conversation [which becomes more and more frequent as time goes by!] under the guise of typing on his phone or smth,

and takes those tidbits to create something so heartwarmingly thoughtful and faceted that we may as well just take a big ole stamp that says "You're Not Fooling Anyone With That Bad Boy Persona" and bash it on that forehead of his. JSJSJ (lovingly ofc :*)

Speaking of panorama-projectors, I can see him making it to interchangeable sceneries!

I'm talking about galaxies and solar systems (feeds into Reader's crow tendencies *sniff sniff* soooo many shiny thingssss)

Deep-sea oceans like Ariel's cove-esque or Pandora's sea settings from Avatar

Or even peaceful golden hills and orchards, just them and the big blue sky, the sound of the breeze dancing and larks singing in their ears.

... whatever they want, Don makes it happen.

He definitely takes Mikey's artsy avenues and teams up with him so they can surprise the Future Kids together!

– – 🩵🩶 Casey and Reader fall asleep curled up together in a pillow fort with the projector playing, and it's the best sleep they've gotten since the sleepovers with their Papa.

made myself cry thinkin' that up *sobs*

And isn't Uncle / Big Bro Raphie such a sweetheart during it all? He's the rock of the family, but he's learning to let the family in a lot more. He's learning to not be so "overbearing", especially with his Protective Instincts flying off the handle since the battle. Sure he can be heavy-handed, but he just wants to keep his family safe. And he always has! He always will. He heals to a comfortable place with time, and while he'll always be everyone's rock, you all are there for him too.

Family is stronger together, and-

You all reassure him of that.

In quiet moments, rare moments when it's just him and Reader – they tell him just that. Their hand is comically small on his forearm, but their eyes are earnest; they stare up at him with a sparkle of admiration. They'd only heard stories regaled fondly by their surviving family members, often accompanied them when they visited his shell on the wall lit by candles.

– meeting their uncle, so young but endlessly strong, is a fickle kind of honor. But still an honor.

(and Raphie may or may not have cried whenever Reader gets him right in the feels hurk-)

Reader and Casey get spoiled rotten (i.e: given the basic necessities to which they did not have access to in their timeline sjjsshahahd) by their family nonetheless!!

UGhhghghh imagine it with me, Normie!

Bubble baths! Warm, cozy clothes! Books that weren't rotting, charred, or furled at the edges! Taking them to comic book stores! Convenience stores! The park! The WATERPARK! The mall!! Introducing them to music and headphones/earbuds to match! Conventions and cons! Amusement parks! Ice cream parlors! Casual strolls throughout New York and doing all these things!

Oh and don't get me started on the adventures they get into in The Hidden City!! :DDD

....

seriously, don't–

foreshadowing -thickens-

*ahem*

In all honesty, the whole clan becomes clingy with each other post-Invasion. That goes w/o saying.

Even Case and Reader, despite the initial tension, have little to no qualms with being pulled into Turtle Piles, nor all the casual affection that comes with healing and growing together!!

It's odd but sweet :')

—Casey and Reader eventually grow out of always seeing the guys as uncles/aunties/parental figures (save for Splints + Draxy + etc.), it becomes more sibling-like in a way!

But they'll always be just as close.

They were just that in their timeline.

But that timeline is lost.

And scary as it may be, they're building themselves a new life. A better life. It's what Papa would have wanted.

So. Why not do just that? :')

>> fam that gets traumatized together STAYS together (/gen)😤

Tragedy brings them closer in ways they didn't think it would.

the awkwardness between reader & leo melts into something more mellow, and we owe a big part of that to Casey!

He's their bridge. Seeing as he's closer to Leo at the given time, he hangs out with his sibbie and Leo at the same time so that they can hang together too. >:3c

Such a genius boy ueueu.

— and before they know it, Reader and Lee-Lee are actually bonding really well. It takes time, and there are withdrawals and setbacks along the way, but it is those obstacles that pave the way for something strong. Something true, honorable, pure, and real.

The reader knows — you know, glory do you know ... that this may not be your Papa.

But maybe...

Maybe that's okay.

You had him. You had Casey. You had your family, the ones once lost to fates beyond your control, and now here you were.

You had all won.

And if that in of itself wasn't something to celebrate with every breath you took,

—you would have given up on that war all that time ago.

Reader and Leo come to a mutual ground with one another.

Let's come to a place where they're more than civil with each other; Leo adores casual affection, and Reader does too— they just weren't willing to give way for such in the beginning.

But it's not unusual to see Leo and them curled up next to each other. Most of the time, Casey's with them too! But in the rare times he isn't, Reader and Leo are comfortable and just doing their own thing.

Like they'll be reading a book, or playing on a handheld device (game, Switch, phone, etc. they're amazed by present-day technology) and Lee's got a comic book,

or he's resting his head close to theirs while he guides them through what they may be doing on their fun little screen.

Leo finds a comfort in you, and you find a comfort in him— once you both let each other in.

All the time it took was worth it :')

I can see them being the most annoyingly caustic yet affectionate besties SNSNJJSJSJ biiig "only I get to make fun of them >:(" energy

or a complete opposite:

once we get past all the vitriol, they're so soft for each other hhhh-

Like Reader becomes fairly protective over him; handles him gently with small smiles and murmured words, helps him out and gives the best muscle massages or is quick to redress and assist when he's smarting from his wounds, knows him well enough to comfort him through panic attacks, indulges in his stupid jokes and puns bc he raised them, hello.

They bounce off each other for hours—

the rest of the guys have resorted to begging, multiple times jsjsj.

and Leo, by this time he knows how much Reader meant- means to him, but he doesn't try to take their Papa's place; he's not scared of them, he does learn to love them /p, and tries to translate that in the most respectful yet straightforward way possible,

and that helped their growing relationship a lot!

He rough-houses (gently) and spars with them, teases them just enough to see their flustered expression, annoys them affectionately — but is the first to come to their defense when someone else gets too cozy.

A lot like a best friend or a sibling.

... He also cuddles and slings his arm around their shoulders and gives the best bear hugs (when they want/need). He reads to them- either one of his comics or one of their acquired books- when they can't sleep or just needs something to hear other than the overbearing voices in their head. He always eats with them, introducing them to new foods he thinks they'd like and giving them the bigger portion (when they get used to stomaching it ofc). Holds their hand. Protects them from the small things and encourages them with the big things, because he knows they can handle it and they just need that little nudge. And to know that someone is right behind them the whole time.

All that good stuff.

(and Casey is so jazzed two of his favorite people are getting along so well aaaa!!)

—hey or maybe it's a healthy mix of both!! ♡₊˚ yeahhhhh.

big BIG ride-or-die energy. I like to imagine that (ㅠ﹏ㅠ)

At the end of the day, they'd die for each other all over again. It gets to THAT point.

Both figuratively and literally.

One milestone in their bond took place and in a way nobody really saw coming—

They were in the Hidden City, stopping by Señor Hueso's for some good grub,

but Leo's leg was pinching a bit more today, and Reader felt a migraine coming on; they wanted to get back home for Mikey's Miracle Migraine Tea, maybe a scalp massage if they pulled the puppy eyes the aforementioned taught them in the future (they don't need to. he'd do it at the drop of a hat. they just like to be eggstra 💅🏼),

so they're both kinda rushing this little outing. Reader's a touch grouchy and their notorious RBF makes a whole comeback, but Leo knows them well enough to know it's not directed at him. He feels for ya, and he sticks close as you both wait for your pickup order to come through.

Then, out of nowhere, some gigantuan yokai comes skulking over.

Reader notices immediately, having folded to lay their head on the cool countertop at the pickup counter; Leo was rubbing up and down their back in comforting circles, smiling down at them with warm, sympathetic eyes as he tries to distract them from their discomfort. He was too focused on them to notice.

and when they spot the glint in the yokai's eyes, they can practically smell the sinister intention as they stride over to them. They're looking for something they had no business to.

Reader tenses, hackles raised and fingers twitching where they gripped the forearms of their hoodie, and their eyes gleam as they peek out from under their hood.

Leo, who thinks they're about to be sick, frets and gently maneuvers them to sit on a nearby stool; he doesn't see the yokai until he's being clapped on the shoulder - the one that's sore, conveniently so - and nearly jumps out of his skin when he whirls on them.

This yokai - stocky, menacing, and a sadistic air about them, simply chuckles and cocks their head at the duo. They're wearing a server's uniform. Reader and Leo both realize it at once-- Reader with dread and Leo with (miscalculated) relief: they're an employee.

Anyways, Leo is put-off by this sudden intrusion of personal space and onslaught of bad vibes, but he's the Face Man and naturally a people person, so he greets them casually and asks if he can help them.

Alongside the incessant ringing in their ears that's their warning before disaster, alarm bells started going off in their head.

They can't really discern what Leo and this bum are saying at this point - everything was fuzzy and garbled like they were underwater; even from their vulnerability sprawled out over the countertop, Reader can tell from their body language that the convo is going in a very wrong direction,

especially when Leo is suddenly shoved back- too hard- and lands in a graceless heap on the floor behind them.

Your mind goes blank. A mindset that was wired into your being from birth – one you haven't had to enter for a while – burns your mind and chest and the alarm bells are deafening, even more so than the sudden uproar of commotion happening vaguely around you.

You're not focused on them. You become laser-focused on the yokai behind you, and between one breath and the next, you're out of your seat and tackling the yokai with a snarl, and you're beating the ever-loving spirits out of them.

You don't stop. You grab at fur and a muzzle, probably a tusk, but you don't care. You don't care, you don't care, you don't care–

– – you're relentless.

All that was in your head was blaring red letters: Protect. Family. Leo. Hurt. Still recovering. Threat. Protect.

Strike.

White-hot rage is pumping through your veins and powering your every strike.

You have them by the nape and slam the yokai's face into the ground muzzle/snout-first; you throw punch after elbow after backhand after punch, even as you feel bone and tendon cracking rather explicitly beneath your knuckles,

and when you're kicked off, rather weakly all things considered–

it doesn't deter you at all.

You use the airborne energy to bounce right back off the countertop (it would ache and bruise like heck later),

rip the stool that you were occupying just moments earlier, clean off its hinges,

and start wailing in on the no-good lowlife bully that thought it beneficial to try your brother.

–– it doesn't stop until the very seat of the stool cracks to shrapnel, the center rolling away like a hubcap, and you're gripping the bar in your hands, heaving like you just ran a marathon.

When the yokai unfolds their arms from shielding their head to peek at you, scrambling to stand, shaking and wide-eyed, your gaze is ferocious.

The skeleton of the once-seat in your hand gets thrown right at their face with a ridiculous strength, and if their muzzle/snout wasn't broken before, it was shattered now.

The yokai shrieks in pain and goes right back down as red iron seeps from their nose, mouth, through their fingers, writhing on the floor-

and you stomp forwards, plant your foot steady in the center of their chest, and press in close until you can see their pupils trembling; that's when you finally speak your first words of the evening:

"Don't you ever come near my brother again. If I see your sorry shank even breathe in his general direction? That stool? The end will find itself shoved right up your pathetic excuse of a voice box. You'd like that, yeah?"

Terrified head shakes and an even more terrified wheeze in response,

"You listen and you listen real good, geezer. I will find you, and a simple warning like this will be the least of your troubles. A warning in which I'm letting you off with, seeing as you're clearly mistaken in your endeavors. Even think of touching Leo, and you deal with this except a thousand times over. It won't be just me. Okay?"

your poorly concealed sadism makes a minor appearance in the sudden change of pitch in your voice and the smarmy grin that stretches your dry lips as you quirk your head and eyebrows in question; when the yokai does nothing but give an immediate jerky nod, you gently pat the side of their face, satisfied.

–which was a lull into a false sense of security, because you shifted your entire body weight and last bit of strength to shove their face back down as you stood up, ignoring their yowl of agony as you did so.

meanwhile everyone in the restaurant be like:🧍

when you came to, everything crashed into you at once: nausea rolled in violent waves in your stomach, the migraine came thrumming full-force, and your ribs creaked as you stumbled over to a shellshocked Leo.

You pulled him up on shaky legs, but much like every patron in the joint, his eyes were trained on the yokai you just obliterated, still writhing on the ground.

Eventually, Senor comes rushing out and, taking in the damage of the scene, demands an explanation. Reader is all-too glad to give it to him, eyes glazed over and voice a lot more calmer than the actual predator they previously were

But once they do, his eyes look over both of them and soften, especially when he takes in how Leo is visibly shaking and Readie looks like they're milliseconds away from passing out.

They get out of there, food in tow, Leo still extremely shell-shocked and Reader worse for wear at what just transpired.

Blue barely manages a portal home- but they do, and when they're safe in the familiarity of the Lair, they both metaphorically collapse.

The night ends with the perturbed fretting of the Clan, but it all boils down to one thing for sure.

Leo has Reader's hand in his, Reader is gripping with the same intensity, and they refuse to be separated for the next few days thereafter.

Anata wa hitori janai.

That is the Hamato way.

oh and that employee never showed up to the restaurant again :D sorry not sorry for using them as collateral for my bebes

more tidbits that came to mind when typing that storm up:

reader's a bad mofo . didn't ya know they were the scourge of the apocalypse? they were clandestinely feared by the kraang. leo kept them under wraps bc he knew how powerful they were. (/j) reader: they protecc, they attacc, but most of all, they gone need ice for they bacc SNRRRTTT

☁️🖇️🥛

HOOOWEEEEE, THAT'LL DO IT– ˚ ༘`✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ I hope you do read all this, sugarcube!! I got kind of carried away, ahaha ^^;; I'm sowwwyyyy!~ But i AM excited to hear your thoughts, whenever that may be! <333

I'm mostly glad I finally got the well-awaited scenario in there!! Basically, Leo has a no-no moment with some lowkey bully and Reader completely overcompensates, even thought they're BOTH still tender from war, yet they go batty-bonkers over his oppression! >:( Don't touch their family!!! The scenario was inspired by a ficlet I read a while ago with Leo in the same situation, but Reader was in Donnie's place :''))) I'll have to find it for ya if you haven't read it yet-

aaa after this, i think i can chill without so much heaviness!! i need to indulge in some crack! some fluff! somethin' now that we've explored the reader and leo's dynamic!! they're the sillies ever and we need more!!

muwah! Hasta la vista, baeby! I'll be back!~ /p

Aaaa goodnight now XD! (ෆ˙ᵕ˙ෆ)♡ Love ya loads, toots!! Enjoy the nomz, haha!🍓❣🍰💌🧸

Ok. First of all, and most importantly, I FREAKIN LOVE THE GOOFY MOVIE IT'S LITERALLY ONE OF MY FAVS EVER- AFTER TODAY IS MY FUCKING JAM-

ALSO ON THE OPEN ROAD??? HEHEH

Ahem.

Now that that's out of my system, let the headcanons begin...

READER'S HEALING PROCESS POST-MOVIE

....................................

Post-movie, after everything calms down, and everyone's just trying to heal,

You definitly open up a bit more.

You'll apologize to everyone for how you acted before,

For being so hostile towards them.

Casey will 100% nudge Leo and you into hanging out together.

It was hard to do since you avoided Leo like the plauge, and he kinda thought you hated him or something.

Casey manages to kill the awkwardness, and now you and Leo go EVERYWHERE together.

Besties for realzies.

Donnie will try to be subtle with his gifting,

Spoiler: he isn't.

Most of the time he'll just leave whatever it is on Reader's bed for them to find with a small note.

He's dissmissive when you thank him too,

"Don't worry about." "It's no big deal."

The projector is now your most prized possesion aside from your mask.

I feel like you always had trouble sleeping in the dark,

In the future it would have been hard to have any kind of nightlight.

Limited resources and all.

So Uncle Michelangelo would fill your and Casey's room with little glowing lights.

Think Gaurdians of The Galaxy when Groot saves everyone, the little balls of light?

So thats what you usually project into the room.

And obviously you and Casey will have the occasional stargazing night.

Meeting Raph for you was pretty much the equivilent of Casey fan-girling over Leonardo.

The stories Papa told you about him made Raph sound like some kind of super hero.

So when you met him, you had to physically try to keep your rbf on, and not freak out.

You think he's so freakin' cool-

Omg if you show even the slightest signs of discomfort or sadness Mikey is on that crap.

Here comes Dr. Feelings, tell him what's wrong.

No family of his is going to be sad for long.

He'll 100% do his best to make you and Casey feel more at home in your new timeline.

Sometimes you'll turn the tables and now you're Dr. Feelings.

He doesn't like it, but he knows mental health is important, so he deals and ya'll have therapy sessions with eachother.

You not so subtly try to spend lots of time with Splinter as well.

You didn't have very much time with your Grandpa before the end of the world took him as well,

But now he's here, and you can tell that he did not change one bit with time.

His younger counter-part is exactly the same as the one you knew in the future.

You do the same thing with Draxxum as well and omfg he is so weirded out.

Like, why does this teenager want to willingly spend time with me? Did Mikey put you up to this? WHAT IS GOING ON-

But nope.

You just missed your weird alchemist Gramps.

April takes you for walks around the city, kinda showing you and Casey what it looks like when it isn't in complete ruins.

She shows you all the cool things it has to offer, and you even come back to the Lair with some shiny things you find on the ground!

You lost your old collection when you left your old timeline, so now you have to start your hoard all over :(

It's ok though, people drop tons of shiny things down water ways and sewer drains.

You and Leo will wander around the tunnels and look for your shinies.

It's a bonding experience, and he teases you about it.

Great gallileo the back and forths between you are so horrible.

They last almost all day, and when ever one of you starts one evryone groans out loud.

The only two people who can get you two to drop it and leave eachother alone are Casey and Raph, but Casey rarely does anything to stop it-

Once you and Leo get close he is such a little terd-

Teasing, and picking and poking.

Big brother energy for realzies.

He'll wake you up by playing California Girls really loud in your ear, and then giggle about it all day, while you try not to strangle him.

If he ever overexerts himself, god help him escape the scolding-

EVERYONE is on his shell about it.

But ESPECIALLY you.

It's even worse when you get upset at him, because after everyome else is done scolding him, they'll move on.

But you? You are so petty about it.

You scold him for hours,

Then you'll just kinda... sit there, silently glaring off into space.

It makes him feel so bad for worrying Reader, that he doesn't overwork himself more than like- five times before guilt makes him just chill tf out and heal.

That scenario you wrote, where Reader absolutely rocks that yokai's shit for messing with Leo?

(Wonderfully written by the way, truely a masterpiece)

First of all total fuck around 'n find out energy.

Second of all, I'm in LOVE with the idea of Reader going absolutely feral on the battle field.

In the future, EVERY fight was life or death, and I think Reader may need to learn that here, in this timeline, not every fight requires you to freakin' wreck the opponent.

Raph kinda has that talk with them after Senor told him how they messed that employee up.

Not every fight requires your 100%.

Then he'll totally congradulate you for destroying that jerk that hurt Leo.

Reader gets a reward cookie.

....................................

Apologies this took so long to answer my dear (/p).

But here it is!! That scenario at Runof The Mill- *chefs kiss*

Beautiful. Amazingly written. I LIVE for feral reader.

191 notes · View notes

chickensarentcheap · 1 year ago

Text

Lost and Found- Chapter 22

Fandom: Extraction

Pairing: Tyler Rake and Esme Drummond (OFC. But you do not have to read the others in the series to understand this fic.)

Warnings: some profanity, angst

ALSO, IT'S A LONG ONE, FOLKS lol. Sorry.

*Includes Extraction 1 and 2 canon mentions

Tagging: @tragiclyhip @munstysmind @themaradwrites @youflickedtooharddamnit @secretaryunpaid @kmc1989 @thebejeweledwatercat @asirensrage @theesirenteller @residentdormouse @arrthurpendragon @ocappreciation @occommunity @karimac @alisbackalleybbq @ninjasawakenedmystar

Link to Ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/43179357/chapters/130239049

My tag list is OPEN. Please just let me know if you'd like to be added :D

****

He lounges in the room Millie shares with Abuela. Stretched out on his side and propped up on his elbow; watching as his daughter quietly and contently plays just mere inches away. The four-year-old clad in her choice of attire for the day; consisting of a red and black button-down shirt paired with extremely bright and bold leggings with cat faces splashed over every inch. Her hair loose and unruly; falling into her eyes and over her face as she kneels in front of a large plastic tote box. Holding a treasure trove of belongings that Yaz had managed -after he and a small team had successfully broken in- to gather from Alessio’s home. Her entire collection of GI Joe dolls and My Little Ponies, more art and craft supplies, and a handful of Barbies and accessories.

“Tyler?”

He helps himself to one of the wine gums from the open carton that sits between them. Even in the midst of all of his prepping and immersing himself further in the role of mercenary, he had taken the time out when she’d requested his attention. Unable to resist that tiny voice, that hopeful smile, and those brilliant blue eyes. “Yeah?”

“Do you think that Barbie…” Millie holds up her favourite doll; baring beautiful dark skin and shimmering black hair and wearing a sparkling gold mini dress. And a matching pair of impossibly high heels. ”...THIS Barbie…would like GI Joe?”

“Which GI Joe are we talking about?”

“This guy!” She picks up the action figure in question; tall and muscular with blond hair and green eyes, clad in his fatigues. “He’s my all-time fave! The rest are just…I dunno…too basic for my best Barbie.”

“Basic?”

“Momma says that, in a nutshell, someone who is basic is VERY boring. Unoriginal. They don’t offer anything new. They can put you to sleep with how ordinary and vanilla they are.”

“She says that a lot about people?”

“Just the guys who try and date her. And you know what? She’s right. They’re basic as hell.”

Smirking, he pops the wine gum into his mouth.

Millie lowers her voice. “Momma actually calls them a bad word. Can I tell you what it is? Without getting in trouble? Or without telling her I said it?”

“I won’t give you any grief for it. And remember what I told you? About how snitches get stitches? Your secret’s safe with me.”

“She calls them ‘basic bitches.’” She dissolves into giggles, both hands covering her mouth, her eyes narrowed and sparkling. “Isn’t that hilarious? Basic bitches. It’s mean, but it’s funny too!”

“Does your mom date a lot? Has there been a lot of guys? Before Alessio? That come around?”

“No. Not really. Not a lot. Just a few. And momma didn’t date. They TRIED and date her.”

“Gotcha. So they ask her out and…?”

“And she always said ‘no’. That she wasn’t interested. She was nice when she told them that. She said just too busy with work and taking care of me. But once they were gone? She told me the real deal.”

“She told you? Or did you hear her telling someone else?”

“You’re good. You’re REALLY good. Don’t tell her that either, okay? That I spy sometimes? I hear things. Mostly when she’s talking to Auntie Nik on the phone or Facetime. Sometimes it’s Uncle Yaz. Mom thinks I’m asleep, but I’m really sitting at the end of the hall. She can’t see me if she’s in her room, and I’m hiding there.”

“This is when you lived in your old apartment?”

Millie nods. ”I LOVED that apartment. It was nice. Better than living at Alessio’s dumb-ass house. I wasn’t allowed to do anything there. I wasn’t allowed to make crafts because they were too messy, I wasn’t allowed to listen to music and dance, and I definitely wasn’t allowed to have a pet. I had a cat. Before we moved in with him.”

“Where’s the cat now?”

“Uncle Duey took her. Her name is Beatrice, but everyone calls her Bea. Like how my name is really Amelia, but everyone calls me ‘Millie.’ She’s super cute; she’s black, but she has white under her chin and near her nose, and she has white socks. We got her from the shelter.”

“You miss her?”

“I miss Bea all the time. She used to sleep with me. Every night. Right by my head. And she was a lot of fun! She would play fetch; I’d throw her favourite toy, and she’d run and grab it and bring it back to me! And she LOVED to sit in the window and yell at the pigeons that came on the balcony. I bet she would have grabbed ‘em and beat ‘em up if mom let her outside.”

“That wouldn’t have been good. What if they beat HER up?”

“Do you know who the Bowery King is?”

“I know a bit about him.”

“Momma and Uncle John know him. I only met him once. Momma took me to where he lives. He has tons of pigeons! And mom said if Bea ever got out and caught one of his birds? We would have been in big shit!’

Tyler gives a small chuckle. “I can imagine.”

“Uncle John said we would have been fine. He would have protected us. He would have told the Bowery King to take a hike! He didn’t say it like THAT, though. He said the ‘f word’. Do you know what word I mean?”

“I do. Very well. So about these guys your mom would date…”

She stares at him pointedly. And in those narrowed eyes and furrowed brow, he immediately sees himself.

“That tried to date HER,” he quickly corrects himself. “She didn’t like any of them?”

“I mean, I guess she liked them enough. To at least give them a chance.”

“What happened? Things didn’t work out?”

“She got bored with them. They weren’t interesting enough for her. And they all had boring jobs; lawyers and doctors and guys that work on Wall Street. Yawn city! And they weren’t even good-looking to make up for it! But there was one guy, though. That was pretty cool. I liked him.”

“What was he like?”

“He was super nice. He would always bring us takeout; pizza and Chinese and fried chicken and even tacos!”

“Everything is about food with you, isn’t it.”

“It’s my love language. It makes my tummy AND my heart happy. I don’t care if I get fat when I’m older. I’m gonna eat as much as I want. Whatever I want, too!”

“So this guy…”

“He used to take us to Rangers hockey games and to see the Mets play baseball. And sometimes, he’d take me places all by himself. We’d go to the movies and bowling and to the arcade!”

“Your mum was okay with that? Just sending you off with him!”

“She trusted him. He was a policeman!”

Tyler frowns. “He was a cop.”

“Not like a regular one. He wore normal clothes. Sometimes a suit and tie. And he would go to accidents and murders and stuff and ask people lots of questions.”

“He was a detective?”

“Yeah! That’s what he was! He was an alright guy, though. He was nice to me. And I think he REALLY liked mom.”

“Did he ever stay over?”

“Hell no! That’s a big no-no! Momma NEVER let that happen. She would always say that ‘Millie isn’t ready for that kind of thing’. And she was right. I didn’t want to see some guy walking around in his gitch first thing in the morning!”

“What happened? With your mum and this guy? She wasn’t into him?”

“She seemed like she was. They spent a lot of time together. It’s kinda weird, right? That he was a cop? ‘Cause momma’s job is totally illegal, and Auntie Nik is a criminal! Did you know that? That she was in jail?”

“I did know that, yeah.”

“Totally badass, right? But the guy? He found out the truth about what mom does for a living. And everything about Auntie Nik and Uncle Yaz. After that, he couldn’t date momma anymore. If he did, he’d have to arrest her.”

“That wouldn’t have been good.”

“No. But instead of doing that, he just decided not to see her anymore. He said he would pretend he NEVER found out the truth. That’s good of him, I think. ‘Cause then momma would have gotten in trouble, and I never would have seen her again. That would have made me really sad. Not to have my momma. And you never answered my question.”

“I forgot what it was.”

“Would my favourite Barbie like my favourite GI Joe?”

“What do you think?”

“Well, he seems nice enough. He’s definitely not boring. Like Ken. Ken is definitely what mom would call a basic bitch.”

“Yeah, he’s always been a drongo.”

“What does that mean? drongo?”

“Stupid. An idiot.”

“A dumb ass?”

“Basically. That’s what we call them. In Australia. Drongos.”

“Does everyone in Australia talk like you do?”

“Maybe not exactly like it. But we all have accents. They sound a bit different; depending on what area you come from.”

“And are there tons of cool words there? That you say different than us?”

“Way too many to count. Once you get settled, I’ll teach you all kinds of cool slang.”

“Will you teach me the swears too?”

“I don’t know about THAT.”

“Please? Pretty please? I want to learn the swears! I promise I won’t repeat them. Not in front of other adults or kids. And especially not in front of momma. It can just be for us!”

“We’ll see.”

“And am I really going to get to see kangaroos and koalas?”

“I get them all the time around the house. The koalas love the trees in the backyard. They’re always hanging out in them. You’ll have to be careful, though; they’re cute, but they can be nasty. Don’t go around chasing them and trying to pick them up, alright?”

Millie nods. “Momma said there’s lots of snakes there, too. Will we get to see those?”

“Sometimes they even get in the house. Then I have to grab them and take them back outside. Are you scared of snakes?”

“Nope. Momma is, but I’m not. I think they’re cool.”

“You can help, then. We get any in the house, you can be the junior snake wrangler.”

“Is it true that the spiders are the size of dinner plates? That’s what mom said.”

“They can be≥ d. They won’t hurt you, though. They’re huge and ugly, but they’re not dangerous.”

“I wanna see one. Really bad!”

“Tell you what, first one I have to relocate ‘cause your mom is threatening to burn down the house? I’ll let you hold it. Get you used to handling them. So you’re not freaking out when you see them wandering around the place.”

“So I’m not a ‘fraidy cat like mommy! When we lived in our old apartment, we’d get spiders! Just little ones, though. And daddy long legs. She was even scared of them! I’m the one who had to get them for her. And she would always want me to kill them! ‘Millie, get him! Squish him!’ Mean mom! But you know what I did instead? I saved a spaghetti sauce jar and cleaned it all out and that’s what I’d put them in. And then I’d take them outside and let them go!”

They lapse into a comfortable silence, and Tyler watches her as his little girl neatly arranges her toys and craft supplies in the bin; not having the heart to point out that all the transporting during their relocation to Australia would no doubt leave the bin in a disorganized mess. She hums while she works; a trait she’d inherited from her mother, and he’d both discovered and fallen in love with- during their year together.

Yet despite the similarities to Esme, he sees more of himself inside Millie than anything else. The identical profile -before his nose had been broken and left him with the bump in the bridge-, the same furrows in the brow, the brilliant blue eyes, the curve of the jaw line, the slim, slender neck, and long, almost gangly limbs. And it’s almost unsettling; sitting across from his ‘mini me’ with all their likeness and her resemblance in physical appearance, personality and likes and dislikes she shares with his son. Their love for drawing and crafts. Their care and compassion for animals. Their endless curiosity and love for life and everyone in it.

Sitting back on her heels, she shoves her hair out of her face “Tyler?”

“Millie?”

“Can I ask you a question?”

“You’ve been on a roll so far. I don’t see a reason for you to stop now.”

“It’s kinda personal. And touchy.”

“Personal and touchy for who?”

“Me. I might get emotional.”

“That’s okay. You’re human. Nothing wrong with being emotional.”

“I don’t want to embarrass myself. In front of you.”

“There’s nothing for you to be embarrassed about. It’s normal; to get emotional and show and talk about feelings. Even guys like me do it.”

“Really?”

He nods. “I didn’t do it for a long time. I was always scared to. And then I met your mum, and she taught me that it was alright to show that side of myself. To get angry and sad. To even cry sometimes.”

“YOU cry?”

“Everyone does. Or everyone should, at least.”

“And mumma taught you that?”

“Your mum taught me a lot of things. About myself. And about others and how to treat them. What do you want to ask me?”

Millie releases a long, heavy sigh as she steels her emotions. “Do you think he’ll like me? When he meets me?”

“Who is ‘he’?”

“My dad.”

His entire body tenses; throat and jaw tightening, stomach clenching.

Millie continues, not noticing his sudden discomfort. “My daddy lives really, really, REALLY far away. We’ve never actually seen each other. And momma said that when I’m a bit older, she’s going to take me to meet him. And I wanna meet him, but I’m scared. That he won’t like me.”

“Why wouldn’t he like you? What’s not to like?”

“What if he thinks I’m annoying? ‘Cause I talk so much? Or what if he thinks I’m too noisy and too messy and too bossy and that I need to go live somewhere else? Away from mom.”

“Did someone say all those things? About you? Is that why you’re afraid he will?”

“Alessio. He didn’t like me being around. He said I was ‘too much’. That I needed to be taught how to behave ‘cause mom obviously never bothered to do it. He wanted to send me away. To a special school. Where I’d have to live. Instead of with momma.” Her lower lip and chin wobble as tears sparkle in her eyes. “I don’t want to be away from momma. I’d miss her too much. I’d cry all the time.”

“No one is going to take you away from your mum. You’re going to stay with her. Until you grow up and you meet some nice guy and…”

“Or girl. It could be a girl, too. That’s okay, you know. If girls love girls and boys love boys.”

“...and you have little ones of your own. Then you’ll want your own space. To raise your family.”

“But somewhere close to mom. Real close. Maybe next door. ‘Cause I don’t want to be far away. What if I need her? Or what if she needs me?”

“Then you live as close as you can to her. But still be under your own roof. No one is going to take you from your mum. She’d never let that happen. I’D never let that happen.”

“He was mean. Alessio. Mom and him fought all the time. Is it my fault? That they did?”

“No. It’s not. And nothing that happened the other night is your fault, either. You know that, yeah?”

She nods.

“You didn’t do anything wrong. You didn’t cause them to fight. They fought because your mum was sticking up for you. Because she would do anything to protect you. And he didn’t like that.”

“And because he’s a drongo!”

“He definitely is. A big fucking drongo.”

Clamping a hand over her mouth, she giggles at his words.

“And why would your dad not like you? What’s not to like?”

“Because I can be super loud. And messy. And a bit too much.”

“You’re four. You’re supposed to be loud and messy. And a bit too much.”

“So you think he will? Like me?”

“No. I don’t think he’ll like you. I think he’ll love you. How can he not? You’re his little girl. His baby. So unless he’s a complete asshole…”

“He’s not. Momma said he’s a really nice guy. And momma wouldn’t lie about that. If he was a jerk, she’d say so. And she wouldn’t take me to meet him, that’s for sure.”

“What else has your mum said? About your dad?”

“Just that he lived really far away and that he was a good person with a really good heart. That she wished things could have been different and that she never had to leave. It made her sad, you know. That she couldn’t stay. It made her cry. Talking about it. I don’t like it when mom cries. It hurts my heart.”

“Hurts my heart, too.”

“And she said she loved him. Very much. And that she always would.”

He noisily clears his throat in a desperate attempt to wash away the lump of emotion that threatens to choke him.

“Do you think he loves her? Still?”

“Maybe. You’d have to ask him that.”

“Can I tell you something?”

Tyler nods.

“I’m also scared that he’ll want momma back. ‘Cause we’ll be living with you. And you love momma, and she loves you, and we’re gonna be a family, right?”

“That’s what I want.”

“But what if he wants momma for himself? And you have to fight over her?”

“I’m not worried about that. I already know I’d win.”

“I don’t want to be away from momma, but I don’t wanna be away from you, either. I want to meet him, but I don’t want to live with him. I want to live with YOU. You wouldn’t let him take us, would you? You’d stop him, right? If he tried to force us?”

“He wouldn’t stand a chance. I’m not giving you or your mumma up. You guys are stuck with me.”

“If he doesn’t like me, will you punch him in the face?”

“If you ask me too. But you don’t have to worry about that. He’ll like you. He’ll LOVE you.”

“You promise?”

“I promise.”

“And you promise you won’t let him take us? To live with him? Like I said, I wanna meet him, not live with him.”

“You and your mom aren’t going anywhere.”

“What if mom goes? If she does, can I stay with you? I’m sure my dad’s a good guy, but he probably can’t protect me like you can. He’d probably be scared of the bad guys. And he’s probably not as awesome as you. With the cool hair and all the tattoos and stuff. I bet he’s not like that. At all.”

“You won’t know until you meet him. But even if he is cool, there’s no way he’s as cool as me.”

“Oh god…” Millie gives a dramatic gasp. “...what if it turns out he’s a basic bitch?”

“No one as awesome as you could ever come from someone that’s a basic bitch.”

“That’s a really good point.”

“Your dad is going to love you. Don’t ever doubt that. And don’t ever doubt how much your mum already DOES love you. There’s nothing she wouldn’t do for you, Millie. You’re her baby. You always will be. No matter how old you get.”

“Momma always wanted to be a mommy. Did you know that?”

“I do. We used to talk about it. And we used to talk about having babies. Together.”

“Really?”

Tyler nods. “We wanted to get married. Have a family. And then things fell apart, and we broke up.”

“But if you didn’t break up, she never would have met my dad. And I wouldn’t be here.”

“Where there’s a will, there’s a way.”

“What’s that mean?”

“Let’s just say that if something is meant to be, it’ll be. If someone is meant to be in your life, you’ll find your way back to them. No matter how long it’s been since you last saw them. And I haven’t seen your mum in a long time.”

“But you still love her?”

“I love your mumma very much. More than I ever thought I could love someone. And you know who else I love?”

The four-year-old shakes her head.

“You.”

Millie squeals when she’s scooped up and thrown high over his head; dissolving into giggles when he effortlessly catches her effortlessly and then tickles and lightly pinches her sides. He switches to pressing endless kisses over every inch of her face until she’s laughing hysterically; squirming and complaining that his beard is scratching her. And when he at last collapses onto his back, bringing her tiny body to rest on top of him, she wraps both arms around his neck. Noisily kissing each of his cheeks, and then beaming down at him.

“I love you, too.”

*****

After helping settle Millie for the night, he meets with Nik and Yaz in the former’s hotel room; slowly and meticulously going over his end of the extraction. Pouring over the blueprints of the hotel’s ‘bowels’ spread across the table as Yaz paces the floor; laptop in hand as he verbally rifles off pertinent information. Nik stands alongside Tyler; hunched over the papers, using a red marker to circle and isolate important spots on the map.

“The route will take you through a few different places,” Yaz announces, pausing his pacing in order to take a swig of coffee. “This is the order: secondary kitchen, boiler room, laundry facilities, and an underground bunker.”

Tyler uses the tip of his index finger to trace the path. “What’s the bunker? What’s the story of that?”

“It’s where Winston hides out during ‘intense situations,’” Nik explains. “It’s highly stocked; every handheld weapon you can possibly think of. And its corresponding ammo.”

Tyler smirks. “Something tells me it’s not your basic ‘shelter in place.’ I highly doubt he hangs out somewhere with concrete walls and bare lightbulbs.”

“It’s as luxurious and over the top as you’d expect from him,” Yaz pipes up. “He’s known to hold ‘executive meetings’ and talks with weapons dealers in there. It’s how we first met him. Years ago.”

“There’s no other way to the loading docks? That doesn’t take me right past his little hideout?”

Yaz shakes his head. “None. When it comes to the blueprints, what you see is what you get. Everything that is available to us is right there. There’s no secret passages, no hidden hallways, no indirect path. It’s this way, or no way.”

“And there’s no other options? When it comes to exits?”

“This is the safest route out of The Continental. There’s too much foot traffic if you go in any other direction. This is the only path that’s NOT heavily patrolled by security. And trust me, this place doesn’t just have regular, run-of-the-mill guards to keep things running smoothly and make sure people stay in line. They’re heavily armed. AND expertly trained. You take a different way and run into half a dozen or more…”

“Yaz and I have walked every possible path, documented every step,” Nik says. “None of them give you even the slightest chance of going unseen and unheard like this one does. It’s too risky any other way.”

“Can’t exactly go unseen and unheard if I have to go right past it. I’m leading her right to the wolves. If Winston is hanging out in there and he hears us…”

“It’s a secure room,” Yaz explains. “It’s essentially a vault; with walls thicker and more secure than anything you’d see at even the most high end of banks.”

“A bomb could go off right outside the door, and whoever’s inside wouldn’t even hear it,” his sister adds. “There is no way if he WAS holed up inside, that Winston would know you’re even out there.”

Tyler sighs. “Just the thought of taking her right past his doorstep…”

“This whole place is his doorstep,” Nik reminds him. “There’s no one hundred percent foolproof way to get out of here. In the end, it comes down to picking the least of the evils and just going with it. Hoping for the best.”

“That’s hardly reassuring. This isn’t exactly the job I want to resort to just ‘hoping for the best’. I can’t just cross my fingers and hold my breath and pray that everything’s going to work out. If it wasn’t so personal…”

“We wouldn’t have decided on this route if we had any other option. You know that we’d never put you at risk. That we’d…”

“I don’t care about me. This comes with the territory; putting my ass on the line. But taking her right into the lion’s den? And just hoping nothing goes wrong? That’s not good enough, Nik. That’s not NEARLY good enough.”

“If there were any other options, we would have found them. But this is it, Tyler. It HAS to be this way. There’s nothing else. It’s this way or no way.”

Heaving a sigh, he runs his hands through his hair and down his weary face. Stepping away, he pours himself a cup of coffee from the carafe on the window sill; his back to the others as he nurses his drink and stares into the night. And he finds himself marvelling at the neighbouring buildings; blazing pillars of light that climb high into the black canvas of sky. And in that moment, in a city of millions and in the midst of the hustle and bustle, he’s never felt so…done. Tired of the job and everything that comes with it; the danger and the unpredictability from one moment to the next. He finally feels ready; confident in the decision to -when the final mission is finished and the coast is truly clear- to walk away from it all. To concentrate on creating a normal life; pouring his attention and his energy into firefighting and running his own business. And being a husband and a father. Someone that Esme and Millie can rely on. Not just to protect them, but to provide for them.

Love them.

Nik joins him at the window, uncapping a bottle of water and taking a sip. “Talk to me.”

“About?”

“You’re unsettled. This isn’t like you. You’re usually focused. You have your head on straight. You never break a sweat. Now…”

“This isn’t a regular gig, Nik. You can’t expect me to act like it is.”

“I HAVE to expect it. In the same way YOU have to treat it like you would any job I give you. You can’t let your heart overrule your brain. It’s dangerous. Life threatening. If you start feeling too much…”

“How can I not? This is as personal as it gets. This isn’t just random people I’ve been hired to help. It isn’t my ex-sister-in-law and her kids. This is MY kid. And it’s Esme. MY Esme. These aren’t regular clients.”

“You have to treat them like they are. If you don’t…”

“I can’t just turn it off. Maybe six, seven years ago, I would have been able to. I would have been able to separate THAT Tyler from THIS Tyler. But now…”

“This was a bad idea. Getting you involved. And I told her that. That calling you was the worst thing we could do. That I had other people that could handle this sort of job and…”

“Calling me was the best thing you could have done. For more reasons than one.”

“We’re not going to talk about that. Now isn’t the time. Now…”

“You should have called me a long time ago. About Millie. You had every chance to tell me; that I had a kid out there. And the least you could have done was tell me Esme was alive. You have had every opportunity to put my mind at ease. To let me know that she was okay.”

“I already have explained. Why I did what I did. And I’ve already apologized. I’ve…”

“I don’t care about your apology. I don’t need you to keep saying, ‘I’m sorry.’ Remember when you gave me shit? For not telling you it was my ex-wife who hired me in Georgia? How you talked about not needing my apology but my trust? That should have went both ways. Because now? After everything you’ve done? Everything you COULD HAVE done? How am I supposed to trust YOU?”

She blinks, taken back by his honesty.

“I can’t do this anymore. Not even as a side gig. I can’t keep putting myself out there. Everything’s changed. The second Esme walked back into my life…”

“Don’t make any hasty decisions. Right now, you’re running on pure emotion. You’re…”

“She’s going to need me, Nik. And not like THIS. She doesn’t need mercenary me. She needs a partner and husband and a father to her little girl. And any kids that might come after that. She needs me home. Safe. She shouldn’t be watching me walk out the front door and then spending days…weeks…wondering if I’m going to walk back in.”

“You’re going to have all the time in the world to think about quitting. When this job is done and I’ve taken care of things here in the city, and there’s no more threat…”

“I don’t need any more time. My mind was made up the second I saw her. As soon as she walked into the room and I realized she was the one who hired me, that was it. I don’t need to think about it.”

“Is it what she wants? You walking away?”

“It’s what she deserves. This life? It’s not good for her. And it’s definitely not good for Millie. It’s time, Nik. This is it. No more. No more calling me and asking for favours. I’m done. And if that means you lose my number and forget I ever existed, then that’s the way it has to be.”

“That would never happen. Whether you work for me or not.”

“Esme and Millie have to be first. I made that mistake with Mia; putting the military before her and our boy. I’m not going to do it again. Not with Esme. Not with the love of my life. I lost her once. I’m not going to lose her again.”

“And you’ve talked about this? With her? You’ve…”

“We’re getting married. As soon as we can. Just something small. The two of us and Millie and a couple of witnesses. We have five years to make up for. We’re not going to waste any time.”

“And you’ll be happy? Giving this up? Entirely?”

“Maybe not at first. But it’s something I HAVE to do. I have a family now.”

“You’ve had a family all this time. Yaz and me and…”

“It’s not the same, and you know it. I have a daughter. I’m going to be a husband. And those are the two things I have to concentrate on. I need to give them a normal life. Away from all of this. They deserve better. From me.”

Sighing, she nods slowly as she considers his words)

“You’ll find someone else. That annoys you as much as I do.”

“Maybe that’s true. But I definitely won’t find someone that can do the job nearly as good as you.”

“Maybe it’s time for you to move on, too. Do something else with your life. Remember what you told me? In Austria? About how my entire life fit inside one little box? And how I should do something about it. Well, it’s taken me a couple of years, but that’s exactly what I’m going to do.”

“If anyone deserves a shot at a normal life…”

“And maybe you should take your own advice. You can’t tell me this is all you want. Being caught up in all of this. You can’t tell me this is the only kind of life that makes you happy? What about filling your own boxes? When are you going to start on that?”

A smirk tugs at the corner of her mouth. “I’m not taking personal life advice from you. Considering the mess you made of things by getting hooked up with Delaney…”

“I know I’m not the guy who should be talking. I don’t exactly have the best track record; when it comes to women and marriage and having kids. But this can’t be it. This can’t be all you want. And don’t even try and lie; I know when you’re full of shit.”

Managing a small laugh, she reaches out to rub his upper arm. “I hope it all works out for you. I hope you and Esme go on to get married and stay that way for a few decades. I hope you have more babies. And grandbabies. I hope you get your happily ever after.”

“So do I.”

“But for now, can we concentrate on other things? On what’s in front of us? Because none of that will happen for you if you don’t get Esme out of here. If that goes wrong…”

Tyler sips his coffee. “I’ve got…concerns.”

“About the plan? The route?”

“I’m not thrilled with having to take her that away; parade right past where Winston might be hanging out. But if there really is no other choice, I’ll make it work.”

“There Is no other option. Believe me, I would have given you one if there were.”

“It’s more than that. Something doesn’t feel right. Something ISN’T right.”

“In what way?”

“Winston’s been way too quiet. Since that sniper tried to take Millie and me out. He hasn’t come up to the suite once; to see how she’s holding up. Don’t you find that a little odd? Considering he calls her his granddaughter? You don’t find it strange that he hasn’t bothered to check if she’s okay?”

“It’s more than a little odd. Much more.”

“All he cared about was the room getting shot up. Us ‘making a mess’ of things. Bringing trouble here. Other than taking the time to try and reem you out…”

“He learned very quickly. That NO ONE speaks to me like that.”

“...he hasn’t made any attempt to contact Esme. And I know that should make me happy; considering he’s got some kind of fucked up old man crush on her…”

“It’s unsettling.”

“Very. He spent how many months keeping her safe here? After that adjudicator showed up at our place, and Esme took off? Better part of a year, yeah?”

Nik nods.

“Even after that, when she finally could go on with her life, he kept tabs on her. Made sure that no one was watching her or causing her trouble. And look how fast he came to the rescue this time. When she and Millie needed a place to hide out.”

“He isn’t just seeing her as a daughter. I’ve always said it; that the way he feels goes far beyond what a parent would feel for a child. It never sat well with me; how much he doted on her and needed to be around her.”

“It’s fucked up. Not just how he feels about her, but how far he’s willing to go to keep her here. Under his thumb. And away from me. Offering me the money to walk away, threatening me, having a sniper try and take me out…”

“We don’t know that was him. That organized that. We…”

“All of that, and now suddenly he’s disappeared? Gone silent? He doesn’t give a shit about her anymore? He hasn’t bothered to check up on her or Millie? It doesn’t make sense. Something isn’t right, Nik.”

“Is that your brain or your gut telling you that?”

“A bit of both.”

“I’ve already told you to listen to your instincts; that they’re very rarely wrong. And if something doesn’t feel right to you…”

“It feels FAR from right.”

“You think he knows what we’re up to? Do you think we might have a mole? That’s tipped him off?”

“It’s possible. He could be just lying in wait. For us to make a move. Is there anyone that you don’t trust? On the team? That sat in on the plans and might have shared the info?”

“I wouldn’t have them here if I didn’t trust them.”

“If he knows what we’re up to, we’re fucked. He’ll be on us before I even get Esme anywhere near the exit. And if he knows what day and time…”

“You’re thinking he might ambush you.”

“Not just him. If he does have a small army of these highly trained security people…”

“Should we change the date? The time? We can’t change the path. There’s no other route to take. And if we’re not out of here before the deadline he’s given us…”

“How comfortable do you feel going to him?”

“It’s pretty much the last thing I want to do, but…”

“What if I asked you to go and talk to him? Try and find out what he knows. See if you can convince him to give us some extra time?”

“Stay here even longer? Tyler…”

“Not actually stay here. But put it in his head that we’re going to, then leak a fake date and time. If he thinks we’re taking off then, that opens the door for the plan we already have. Puts him off our scent.”

“You think he’d fall for that?”

“I don’t know. But at this point, I’m willing to try anything. I HAVE to get her out of here. Without him knowing. Because if he catches on and tries to stop me…”

“If you kill him, you’re just opening up a whole new world of hurt for yourself. And for Esme and Millie.”

“If he gets in my way, I won’t have a choice. Because he’ll stop at nothing to keep her here. And I can’t let that happen. I can’t let him get his hands on her. She’s not his to have.”

“The High Table will come for you. If you kill him, they won’t let you have a moment’s rest. They will track you down. And what kind of life is that? Living with that fear?”

“I’m not scared of them.”

“You should be. Because they won’t think twice about using Esme or Millie to get to you. If you kill Winston and manage to get out of here, you will have a target on your back for the rest of your life.”

“I’ve had one on my back for years.”

“Not from THEM you haven’t. Why would you want to take that risk? Having The High Table after you? Why…?”

“He gets in my way, I will take him out.”

“Don’t do it, Tyler. You may not care about your life, but it isn’t just you anymore. Think about Esme. And Millie. They don’t deserve to live with that kind of fear. And they certainly don’t deserve to lose you. You just got Esme back. You just found out you’re a dad again. Why…?”

“If he doesn’t give me a choice, I’m doing what I have to. To get her out of here.”

“You won’t be safe anywhere. Wherever you run to, they’ll follow. They WILL find you. I’m warning you, Tyler. Don’t do it. Find another way. To deal with him. IF it happens. But don’t do THAT. Anything but that.”

“I can’t make any promises, Nik. Because if he tries to stop me or he hurts her in any way…”

“I am begging you NOT to do it. To not go that route. You can’t take it back. You can’t make things right. If you take him out, you’re signing your own death certificate. You know that, right?”

“I’ll do what I have to do. To get Esme out of here. And if they come for me…”

“Not if. When. WHEN they come for you.”

“Then I deal with it. I pay the price. But you gotta promise me one thing. If that happens.”

“I’m not putting my support behind this. I can’t. I can’t give you my blessing. Not for this. I’m sorry. I…”

“I want you to take care of them. Esme and Millie. Make sure they’re alright. If I’m not around to do it…”

“Don’t talk like that. Don’t…”

“Just promise me, yeah? You’ve done it before; made sure they were safe and taken care of. I’m sure you can do it again. Promise me, Nik. That if something happens to me and I can’t do it myself, you’ll take care of my family. For however long you have to.”

“Tyler…”

“Promise me. That Esme and Millie will be okay. That you’ll keep an eye on them.”

Nik relents. “I promise. But let’s hope it doesn’t come down to that.”

“Yeah…” Sighing, he turns back to the window. “...let’s hope.”

******

It’s after midnight when he returns to the suite; quietly letting himself into the bedroom and then navigating the space by way of the moonlight streaming through the gaps in the curtains. Slipping out of his clothes and tossing them in the open suitcase near the window, he gingerly pulls the blankets back and slips in next to her. A hand on her stomach as he presses his front to her back; eyes closing as he buries his face in her hair and inhales deeply. Taking in that familiar scent. Desperately needing the comfort. The closeness.

“You’re making a habit of this,” Esme teases, her voice quiet, laced with sleep. And she pushes her fingers through his; giving an initial squeeze and then tightly holding his hand. “Coming to bed really late.”

“I’m sorry.” He presses a kiss to the nape of her neck. “It ran longer than I thought it would.”

“Everything went okay? There’s no major changes I need to know about?”

“The plan’s staying the same. I’m not hundred percent on board with it, but considering there’s no other options…”

“Nik wouldn’t take unnecessary risks. With either of us. If she’s adamant that this is the only way it can go…”

“I think I’m just being paranoid. If it wasn’t you and Millie caught up in all this, I’d just go with whatever idea Nik drew up. But seeing as it’s so personal…”

“But do you feel better about things? Then you did last night? Because that spooked me; you questioning everything and not having a lot of confidence in how it’s going to go down. You’re not like that. Not when it comes to the job.”

“This isn’t just any job,” he reminds her.

“You’re going to have to try and focus. You’re going to put your feelings on the back burner and just go with your instincts. Pretend that this IS just like any other job. Because that’s what I need from you. When the time comes. I need THAT Tyler.”

“I’m fucking trying, believe me. But it’s a lot easier said than done.”

“I trust you. To get it together. When it comes to work, you’ve always been able to shut everything else out. Maybe not get rid of it entirely, but at least put it on the back burner. You’re going to have to treat this like it IS just another job.”

“You have a lot of faith in me. You always have.”

“Well, someone needs to.” She rolls over onto her side, eyes briefly closing as he places a kiss on her brow). “How DID it go?”

“It went. We finalized things. And got some loose ends tied up.”

“So that means you’re more confident? About how things are going to go?”

“Yeah…” Leaning in, he nuzzles her temple with the tip of her nose and then pecks her cheek. “...much more.”

“Everything’s going to go nice and smooth,” she enthuses. “According to plan. We’re not going to have any setbacks, no one is going to fuck anything up, people aren’t going to get in our way. Things are going to be perfect and uncomplicated.”

“When did the roles suddenly reverse? Aren’t I normally the one trying to convince you?”

“I can admit, I am usually a touch neurotic…”

“That’s the understatement of the century.”

“...and you are usually the one talking me down off a ledge. But I feel good about this. I feel like everything is going to be fine. That we won’t have any roadblocks. We’ll just get the hell out of here…”

“While I want to share your optimism, when do things ever go smoothly? On the job?”

“I mean, I’ve had a couple of gigs that weren’t major disasters. They weren’t flawless by any stretch of the imagination, but…”

“Remember Dhaka? How easy we thought it would be? After I got a hold of Ovi? That we’d get him to the boat, and we’d be free and clear? Do you remember that?”

“Unfortunately, very well.”

“Believe me, I WANT this to go nice and smooth. No hiccups, no one getting in my way and trying to stop us from leaving. I want that more than anything. But you’ve said it yourself; these people don’t accept defeat easily. They’re not just going to roll over if we DO get out of her.”

“WHEN we get out of here,” she gently corrects. “WHEN.”

“I just don’t want you putting all your eggs in one basket. It’s good to be confident and optimistic, but…”

“It can lead to bad decisions. Stupid mistakes. You get too cocky…”

“Just err on the side of caution, yeah? That’s all I’m asking.”

“Are you asking or telling? Because if it’s the latter, you’re starting your bossiness a little early. I technically don’t have to listen to you until it’s ‘go time’.”

“Who are you trying to kid? You’re not even going to listen to me AFTER that.”

“I promise I will be on my best behaviour.”

“I know what your best behaviour is. And while it’s a step up…”

“I will be completely unproblematic. I will listen to every word the big, bad, mercenary man has to say.”

Grinning, he presses a feathery to the corner of her mouth. “You are so full of shit.”

“You just want to be the boss of me,” she chides and wraps both arms around his neck. “You don’t get to wear the pants very often, but when you do…”

“I wear the pants all the time.”

“You keep telling yourself that. Everyone knows I’m the one in charge. That I’m the boss. I just let you take over every now and then. Stroke your ego. Feed your masculinity.”

“You’re just a regular bleeding heart.”

“And, there are times I DO like you being all aggressive and assertive and bossy. You have to admit, it’s always at the best possible times. The naked ones. Not even you can deny that’s your favourite time to be in charge.”

“I’ll admit to nothing.”

“You don’t have to. The evidence speaks for itself.”

“What evidence is that?”

“I’d say eleven inches poking me in the stomach, or the ass is usually all the proof I need.”

“Eleven? Come on now…”

“Ten and a half? Ten?”

“You are really good for my ego.”

“We’ll have to get an official number. An accurate measurement. I’m sure we’ll be able to track down a tape measure or a ruler when we get to Australia. Inquiring minds want to know.”

“You’re an odd duck, you know that?”

“I like my weirdness. All my quirks and eccentricities. You’ve missed them. Over the course of the last five years. Admit it.”

“I have, actually. I’ve missed a lot of things.” Hooking a finger under her chin, he tilts her face upwards; covering her mouth with his in a long, soft kiss. So pure and beautiful; nothing hurried or aggressive, nor teeming with unbridled lust or overwhelming want and need. A kiss at its most innocent point: adoring, tender, languid. Yet somehow enough to curl her toes and take her breath away.

She gives a sigh when it ends, her eyes remaining closed when he rolls over onto his back; settling her much smaller, lighter frame on top of his.

For five years, she’d longed for this; the smoothness of his skin and the hardness of his muscles. The way his calloused fingers tip continuously skim up and down her spine, his familiar scent and the sound of his voice and how she is able to feel its rumbling deep within his chest. Desperately missing him nearly every second of every day; wanting nothing more than to pick up the phone and beg and plead for forgiveness and end up in his life and his arms and his bed once again. But it had always seemed so far out of reach; believing she was past redemption. Even if he could accept her running away, there was no way he’d ever forgive her for keeping his daughter a secret. Not after the tremendous loss he’d already suffered; still wracked with guilt, regret, and profound grief when it came to the death of his son.

****

“Did you talk to Millie?” His fingertips drift down her spine and briefly settle at the small of her back; a lone fingertip commencing the tracing of the elaborate tattoo that stretches from one hip to the other. “About going with Alcott.”

“I was going to do it tomorrow. Well, today now. After breakfast.”

“I want to be there. When you tell her. I mean, as long as you’re okay with that.”

“Of course, I’m okay with it. You’re her father.”

“Only she doesn’t know what, does she? She has no clue.”

“We’ve talked about this. About when we’re going to tell her. I thought we agreed that…”

“She asked me about him today. Her dad.”

“What do you mean she asked about him? She brought him up out of nowhere? Why did she want to know? What…?”

“She asked me if I thought he’d like her. When she got to meet him. Can you imagine being a little kid and wondering something like that? If your old man is even going to WANT you?”

“No. I can’t even begin to imagine that.”

“She’s four years old. And she’s asking stuff like THAT? She’s worried that she’s going to meet him and he’s going to hate her? Find her a nuisance? Think she’s too loud and too messy and…”

“A bit too much,” Esme finishes for him. “She said that to me once. When she asked about him. About YOU. She said she was worried he’d find her annoying. I just chalked it up to Alessio being a total prick to her. I didn’t think she really felt that way. About herself.”

“She’s just a little girl. And she's carrying around shit like that? How could you have him around her? How could you put her through it? Him treating her like that?”

“I didn’t have a choice. I was in the middle of a job, and if I let my guard down or he found exactly who I was…”

“You should have told Nik you wanted out. The second he started treating Millie like that. As soon as he tried breaking her spirit, that should have been it. You should have got the fuck out of there. She didn’t deserve any of it. Being treated like that.”

“I thought we weren’t going to do this.” Moving away from him, she slaps and shoves his hands away when he tries to prevent her from sitting up. “Not here. Not right now. I thought we were going to wait until we were in Australia and somewhat settled before we talked about all of this. I thought…”

Sitting up, he stretches out his legs and leans back against the headboard. “I can’t do it, Esme. I can’t pretend that everything’s okay. That I’m not pissed off. That I’m not hurt. Do you know what it’s like? When everyone around you has a bigger role in your own kid’s life? All people tell me about is what Millie was like as a baby, all the things that they’ve done for her and with her.”

“They’re not telling you those things to hurt you. They’re just sharing what they know about her. So you can get to know her better.”

“All I hear from people is how they’re her family.”

“It’s because they are. Maybe not a conventional one, but…”

“I’M her family. You didn’t make that baby alone. And I didn’t see any of them making that kid with you either. So unless there’s someone you’re not telling me about…”

“Don’t do that. Say shit like that. I know you’re upset. And you have every right to be. I’ve never once tried to take that away from you. Or tried to downplay it. But you have no reason to question whether or not she belongs to you. Just look at her! She IS you! From head to toe. You’re just lashing out and trying to hurt me, and you know exactly how to do it.”

“I’m not trying to hurt you. I’m…”

“Just admit it, Tyler. Just admit that there’s a part of you that wants to punish me. Make me pay for what I did to you. I’m not going to judge you or hate you for it. I get it, alright? I did a horrible thing; keeping Millie away from you. And you have every right to want to punish me for that.”

“No. I don’t. I’m not like that. I’m not that kind of person. I would never hurt you.”

“I see it in you, sometimes. I’ll catch you looking at me a certain way. And I’ll see it; all this hurt and anger that you’ve got built inside of you. So just tell me the truth. I’m a big girl. I know my mistakes. I admit to them. I own them. So don’t…”

“I don’t want to fight, Esme. That’s not why I brought any of this up. That’s not why…”

“If you didn’t want to fight, you wouldn’t have thrown Millie in my face like that. You don’t think I know how badly I fucked up? Bringing her into that kind of life? You think I don’t feel like complete and utter shit for what happened? What she went through? What she KEEPS going through? You think I like any of this? Having to hide here? Having to hire a fucking mercenary to get us out here and…”

“So that’s how you see me. That’s all you see me as?”

“I never said. Don’t put words in my mouth. I’ve never seen you as JUST that. It’s part of you, but it’s not ALL of you. And I’ve never once thought it was. Who was the one who always talked you down? Every time you’d mention that you did nothing but kill people for a living? Who was the one person that reminded you that you did so much more? Who always tried to convince you that you weren’t the monster you saw yourself as?”

“You.”

“I stayed on that bridge because you deserved a second chance. Because you made your amends. And selfishly, I stayed because I wanted more of you. I wanted more time. I wanted all those plans that we made; I wanted to travel and see the world and fall in love. With YOU.”

“It didn’t exactly go that way, did it.”

“No. It didn’t. But you know what? What we had was good. It was so good. It wasn’t perfect. But neither are we. We had what we needed, and that was enough. We were happy. Weren’t we?”

“We were.”

“I love you. I have always loved you. I always WILL love you. So don’t you ever accuse me of anything else. And never…and I mean never…try and tell me I don’t love my daughter. OUR daughter.”

“I would never say that.” He slides down the bed and reaches for her when she begins to cry; frowning when she pushes him away and stands. Moving to the table in front of the window and leaning back against it; sniffling noisily as she wipes at her eyes. “I’m sorry.”

“I don’t want you to be sorry. I want you to be honest. I need that from you, okay? I know you’re afraid of hurting me; it’s why you won’t just come right out and tell me how you’re really feeling or what’s really going on in your head. But I NEED that, Tyler. Because until you’re truthful about it, I can’t start to make amends. How can I move on and heal when you won’t even acknowledge what I did to you?

“I don’t understand why you need me to be angry. Why..?”

“Because it’s holding me accountable. For what I did. I don’t want you coddling me and holding my hand and patting me on the head and treating me like I’m some fragile little thing. Do you think I’m not going to love you? If you’re honest about everything? Is that what you’re afraid of?”

“I don’t know,” he admits, and swings his legs over the side of the bed. “I guess. Maybe? I don’t want you to think I hate you. Because I don’t. I never could.”

“I know you love me. I know it without you even having to say it. It’s in everything you do. It’s like those five years never even happened. The way you look at me and the way you touch and kiss me and make love to me. It’s like none of the bad stuff ever happened. And I don’t know what I did to deserve that. The way you feel about me. Or if I even DO deserve it. But I don’t question it. Sometimes it’s the only thing I’m sure of.”

“I just don’t see what good can come of it. Me just letting it all out. I don’t understand why you need me to be out there with it. Why can’t you just let me deal with this alone and…”

“That’s the old Tyler. The one that existed BEFORE me. He’s the one that died on that bridge. You’re not HIM. And you haven’t been him in a long time.”

“Maybe I went back to it. Being him. During the last five years.”

“There’s no way. Because you weren’t happy. Being that way. Being HIM. And you worked way too hard after Dhaka. To become better and DO better. There’s no way you’d go back to that.”

“I think you have way too much faith in me.”

“I think you don’t have enough. You would never go back to being like that. I know you. I know your heart. I know…”

“You don’t know a thing about my heart. And you know why? Because you broke it. You fucking tore it out of my chest and stomped all over it. And you expect it to be what it was before you did that?”

“If you were the old Tyler, you wouldn’t have stayed. When you found out I was the one that hired you. You would have turned around and walked out, and that would have been it.”

“I would have stayed. For Millie. I would have done it for her.”

“No, you wouldn’t have. It wouldn’t have mattered. Millie or no Millie, you would have left. The old Tyler? The one with the death wish? The one who didn’t give a fuck about anything except catching a bullet? He would have been long gone.”

“I would have never walked away from her. Even if I wanted to walk away from you, I’d never turn my back on my own kid. I did that once. I wouldn’t do it again. I learned the first time.”

“Is that why you’re here? Why you REALLY want things to work with us? Is that…?”

“I wouldn’t be sharing a bed with you and fucking you. Don’t insult me like that. I know I can be a real dick sometimes, but I’d never lower myself to that. And I would never use you. No matter how pissed off I am.”

“I was just asking. I was just…”

“I’m here because I love you. Because even though you ripped my heart out of my fucking chest and ruined my life, I still want you. In every way. And maybe that makes me a fucking idiot. Maybe I’m just pathetic. A simp. I don’t know. But I love you, and I never stopped loving you. Millie? She’s just this extra piece. This fucking amazing, beautiful, perfect piece.”

“She is pretty amazing, isn’t she.”

“I would never…EVER…accuse you of not loving her. I see you with her. Your entire face lights up when she walks in the room. And every time she hugs you or tells you she loves you or even just calls you ‘mummy’? To me, you’re beautiful all the time. But when she does those things? You’re the most beautiful I’ve ever seen you.”

“She’s my baby. I had wanted to be a mom for so long. And you gave me the chance. You gave me HER. And I could thank you enough for that. For giving me her. Because aside from you, she’s the best thing that has ever happened to me.”

“I know you love her. More than you love yourself. More than you love me. And that’s how it should be. You’re an amazing mum; no one could ever deny that. Or say anything different. Everything you’ve done for her; taking care of her on your own, keeping her safe, managing to bring up this awesome little human. You know how many women wouldn’t have even had her? Considering the circumstances?”

“There was no way I wasn’t going through with it. She was my connection to you. My ONLY connection.”

“Thank you, Esme. Maybe that sounds weird; considering I AM angry and I AM hurt. But thank you. For her. I know it wasn’t the most conventional of ways to find out I’m a dad. But still. Thank you.”

“Please don’t say that. Not after everything I did. Please don’t…”

“She wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you. I wouldn’t have gotten a second chance at this; at being a dad. It’s just the truth.”

Sniffling, she uses the bottom of her t-shirt to wipe away her tears. “You’ve always been nothing if not honest.”

“You broke us. What we had? You destroyed that. And you’re right; it wasn’t perfect. But it WAS good. It was so fucking good.”

“And now? You don’t think it’s good NOW? You don’t think we can get back to that?”

“I don’t want to go back to that. I want to be BETTER than that. We’re not those same two people anymore. We’ve both changed. Mostly for the better, I like to think. Do you want that? For things to be even better?”

Esme nods. “That’s all I want.”

“Then just look at me and tell me why. Why did it have to get to this? Why did five years have to go by? Why…?”

“I don’t know. I honestly don’t know.”

“That’s not an acceptable answer for anyone over seven, and you know it.”

“I was scared. I was selfish. I was so worried about being rejected. And I couldn’t get past that feeling. That fear.”

“I never would have rejected you. Or her.”

“Logically, I knew that. But sometimes, logic isn’t an easy thing to come by.”

“How could you do that to me? Leave like that? After everything we’d been through. After nine months in that fucking hospital. Three quarters of a year, you stayed there. You fought for me. You were the only one who didn’t give up. And then you go and do something like THAT? Just leave?”

“I wanted to protect you. You’d already been through so much. You shouldn’t even have been alive. But you WERE. And I didn’t want it on my conscience; losing you because of something I did.”

“You didn’t do anything. You thought you were in the free and clear. You were told that you were. Long before you met me. It wasn’t your fault; that The High Table went against their own ruling and came for you. You know that, yeah?”

“I think I do. I think I know that.”

“Why didn’t you just give me a chance? To get you out of that fucking mess? I would have done anything to protect you. If that meant packing up and moving thousands of miles away and hiding out? I would have done it. And if they found us, we would have packed up and found somewhere else to hide. Other people could have dealt with it. The bullshit here.”

“I didn’t even think of that at the time. I was more worried that you’d try and go against them. Physically.”

“Esme, I knew my limits. I was clinically dead a year before. Do you really think I thought I stood a chance against The High Table? Alone? I know I’m not the smartest guy on the planet, but give me SOME credit.”

“You always said you’d do anything for me. To keep me safe. Why wouldn’t I think that?”

“If you had told me what happened…with The Adjudicator…we could have talked about all of this. Avoided you taking off. But you didn’t even give me a chance.”

“I just wanted to protect you.”

“And I love you for that. For thinking you had to. But you didn’t just ruin my life when you left. You ruined yours, too. That’s not protecting me. You should have known that’s the last thing I would want. Hurting yourself like that.”

“It’s just such a mess,” she tearfully laments. “A big fucking mess.”

“And if that wasn’t bad enough? You couldn’t even let me know that you were alive. That something horrible hadn’t happened to you. Do you know what’s been going through my head? For five years? The horrible, gross shit it came up with? Even if you didn’t want me back, the least you could have done was let me know you were alright.”

“I fucked up. Badly. I’m the first to admit that.”

“And then you got Nik and Yaz involved. They’ve had to lie for you. Do you really think that was fair? Getting them tied up in this shit? All you had to do was let me know you were alright. You didn’t have to drag it on. Make things even worse.”

“I didn’t know what else to do. I thought I was keeping you safe. I had the best of intentions. I did. But…”

“Even after things settled? And there was no trouble? You still thought there was a reason to keep me safe?”

She shakes her head. “That was just me being a stupid, selfish bitch.”

“You should have told me about Millie. You know everything about me. Every ugly, deep, dark secret. I’ve never hid anything from you. Especially when it comes to my son and what I did. I was always honest about that. Right from day one. In Dhaka. And you knew I wanted to be a dad again. We talked about it. Having kids. I was scared shitless, but I was willing, wasn’t I?”

Esme nods.

“And yet you kept her from me. For five years. You knew I wanted another kid. That I wanted a chance to do things right. Yet you couldn’t even tell me about her.”

“I didn’t do it to hurt you. I WAS going to tell you. I was going to bring her to Australia. Right to your doorstep. After this job was done…”

“It shouldn't have taken this long. You know there was no reason… REAL reason…to keep her from me. Were you scared? The fact you had a kid with a mercenary? One that’s burned a lot of bridges and…”

“No! That never even crossed my mind. I knew what you were. It was never a secret. I knew what you did for a living. It’s how we MET. And I never once worried about you being her dad.”

“So it was just you being scared. Of being rejected.”

“That’s all it was. I’m telling the truth, Tyler. I know I kept a lot of secrets and I’ve told a lot of lies, and I even made a living out of doing things. But I am telling you the truth. That is the ONLY reason.”

He nods slowly, considering her words. “I believe you.”

“I am so sorry. For everything I’ve done. For hurting you like I did. And I know I can’t go back in time and change it, but…”

“No. You can’t. And I wouldn’t even ask you to. Change one thing, it changes everything. I’ve always said that.”

“...but I can spend the rest of my life making up for it. Or at least trying to.”

“You don’t have to. I don’t want you holding onto this for forty, fifty years. Or more. That’s not what I want.”

“What do you want?”

“I want you. I want US. I want to get married. As soon as possible. I want us to raise Millie together. Be a real family. That has normal jobs and fairly normal lives.”

“That’s what I want, too. I want you to be my husband. I want you to be able to be Millie’s dad. Not have to hide it. I want us to have a home and a nice little backyard with chickens and goats and…”

“And more babies. I want more babies.”

“How many more? I do have to draw the line somewhere.”

“I don’t know. Three. Four.”

“You just want to wreck my vagina, don’t you. You’re determined to do it.”

“Why would I ever want to ruin my favourite part of you?”

She gives a derisive snort.

“I’m kidding.” He holds out a hand; a silent request for her to join him on the edge of the bed. And he gathers her close when she sinks down beside him; both arms wrapping around her tiny frame as he drops a kiss on the top of her head. “It’s not my most favourite. Second favourite, maybe…”

Laughing, she playfully elbows him in the stomach, then tilts her face up towards him. “Do you feel better? Getting all that out?”

“Shockingly, yeah.”

“Me too.”

He kisses her softly; the long and languid press of closed mouth upon closed mouth. “I meant what I said. Five years ago. When I told you that there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you.”

“I’ve never doubted it.”

“I will get you out of here. Away from this place. This life. And I’ll stop at nothing to make that happen.”

“I believe you.”

“You’ll never have to think about it again. It’ll just be us. And Millie. We’ll make a new life. The one we were supposed to have. Before this all happened.”

Smiling, she presses a series of feathery pecks along his jaw, then rests her head on his shoulder. “That’s all I’ve ever wanted.”

#Tyler and Esme series #Tyler Rake #Tyler Rake fanfic #Tyler Rake fan fiction #Extraction #extraction fanfic #Extraction fan fiction #Extraction 2 #Rake Lives #Chris Hemsworth #Tyler Rake x OFC #Esme Drummond #Esme Rake

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sasukeless · 3 months ago

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1, 7, 10 and 13 for atla? don't have to answer them all if you cba and i just always feel vindicated by your posts it's very nice

hii sorry this is late but thank uu i’m glad my posts resonate with someone

1) the character everyone gets wrong

iroh, definitely. i mean ofc the show itself helps on this by never holding him accountable for the whole being a war criminal and his attempt to colonize ba sing se. but it’s been years so it’s annoying he still gets the old man that’s just there to give good advice and funny jokes only treatment for majority of the audience.

also jet. it’s odd how ppl are so ready to jump anyone if you don’t like zuko immediately because he redeemed himself but jet it’s still viewed as a complete villain / lost cause.

and lastly azula. my baby i love her unfortunately shes stuck between people that think she’s the worst evil ever and ppl that don’t like she is ultimately written to be a villain. Yes, she’s a victim of her abusive father as much as zuko and unlike him she didn’t have any support from their uncle but still, i don’t think a redemption arc is what her character conclusion should be lol. i’m happy with her still ending as a villain, it’s tragic but also not unrealistic. i find it more entertaining too.

7) what character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because how how the fandom acts about them?

sjjsjsj isn’t it kind of obvious? zuko. i just couldn’t stand the fans for so long. the way they put him in a pedestal. the ship wars. the comparsions to sasuke. IT WAS ALL SO UNBEARABLE.

but i have overcome it actually!!!! lol lately there’s been a pushback in atla fandom and now zuko is being constantly hated and dragged by others stans and while i still don’t care enough for him to be my fave, i felt the call to go against the waves because most of the arguments rn just sound ridiculous like damn. you would think he’s ozai or smth the way ppl talk about him

10) worst part of fanon

huhh i don’t really read atla fics and aus to know mich about atla fanon tbh. maybe how people talk about kyoshi 😭 i swear ppl make her smth she’s not

13) worst blorboficiation

for the same reasons i mentioned before this always goes to iroh!!

#ask game

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cicisfashioninspo · 1 year ago

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Agere Moodboard Day 6: Fave Agere Headcanon

Agere Souji Seta from Persona 4!!

x x x | x x x | x x x

top row are things i think hed love when regressed (head rubs, comfiness, and play food so he can ‘help out’) and the bottom row is what he usually does when regressed without understanding why (longingly pet plushies, boredly play w origami, and desperately try to study but get frustrated and tired in the process)

more explanation under cut!

so if u dont know, in fandom and in canon for the persona 4 game/manga, the protagonist is revealed to have kind of neglectful parents. he grew up always trying to be quiet, helpful, and unneedy in the hopes of pleasing his parents. he was also moved around a lot his whole life for his parents’ work so he couldnt establish friendships until he moved to his uncle’s house. especially with how he is known for caring for everybody and everything he meets, you never see anyone in the game take care of him until the story ramps up and his new family ends up in the hospital and hes stuck home alone. ofc i think this can lend to him regressing, before and especially after november/december in the game.

i think he wouldnt know what regression and he wouldnt understand what happens to him. i think he would be a very tired, quiet, and even a lil grumpy when hes little bc he cant take care of himself and hes frustrated that hes struggling to help others. i think some of his ‘weirder’ traits like eating spoiled food and spending literally all day staring at water/petting cats can be attributed to regression? he definitely needs supervision when hes little bc he gets clumsy, he keeps putting random things in his mouth, and he gets very lonely and overwhelmed with emotions.

i imagine that maybe the whole investigation team wouldnt take care of him when hes little and dojima and nanako definitely wouldnt know (snaps him out of regression probably), but i think the IT would find out bc theyd encounter his shadow after everything is said and done (maybe before he has to move away from inaba and all his new friends) and his shadow is a very shy and needy toddler who just wants to be cared for. maybe also when souji gets sick while nanako and dojima are recovering, i think yosuke would be a caregiver for him and teddie would ‘help’ by being a big bro for a few days.

i wanna write this now...im a pretty closeted regressor so i wanna write about souji getting tentatively cared for by his partner...

#25ageremoodboards #sfw agere #stimboard

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f1nalboys · 2 years ago

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Peacemaker S1 Ep5 Monkey Dory (last episode for the night 🙏) @tinalbion

-giggles :3

-ugh him drinking the eggs

-worst trope ever

-eagley :((( he’s so worried abt chris

-he looks so fucking pathetic uhm…. guys…. 😼 SORRY

-NOOOOOOO eagley brought him a squirrel to eat to feel better :(

-noooo this episode is gonna be so sad i can feel it

-ADRIANANNNN

-sorry

-“they go in through the butt??” JFJEIDNDJD

-superman w the poop fetish 😭😭

-now that we know murn is a butterfly im confused as to why the rest of them don’t know

-but i get it

-NO RHE EXPLOSION IN THE POWERPONTISIDJSIJD economous is so me

-HIM NAMING ALL THE PEOPLEKDJWINDJSBX

-“the fucking cunts from riverdale”

-ADRIAN ANSWERING THR RHETORICAL QUESTIDONCKSNX

-“fargos on tonight” ofc he watches fargo

-he’s so baby girl!!!

-“nice penmanship asshole and fargos not on till tomorrow night you fucking nerd” followed by adrian’s laughter JFJSJDJDJ

-larry is sexy

-ugh. i hate his dad

-leota defending economous <3

-“i didn’t care bc i don’t have emotions like other people do” when he clearly has shown multiple emotions like ok

-“i got bullied too” “how” “by the other kids calling me a bully all the time, saying i was abusive” SHIT UPPPPPP

-they’re finger printing what’s his face

-can they just lie and say he did it anyways

-also fuck larry is. sorry i just love a good silver fox dad bod man

-hehe i love that he loves glam rocks

-they’re bondinggggg :3

-me starting a show: i jsut want everyone to be friends :D

-has he been a butterfly this whole time? like even when he was back doing whatever?

-“evan you fucking pussy!” JFNSODNISHD

-“i finger bang you, i’m not using my pinky” IFNWOFNISD good point king!

-“i forgot women had fingers” IFKOWNCSIND

-stop this shows humor is nailing it for me tbh

-“UGH FUCK i’m never ever gonna kill someone with a chainsaw it’s so not fair” adrian u can kill me w the chainsaw. ok???

-chris and leota r my fave friendship actuslly like idk why but they bounce off of each other really rlly well

-JFNWONFJD

-LEOTA SHOOTING EACH PERSON AGTER CHRIS KILLS RHEM SHES JUST LIKE ME

-ok i’m eating breakfast so who knows how much i’ll type as i watch

-show me some fighting 🗣️🗣️

-why didn’t they just blow this place up

-YESSS BUTTERFLY FIGHTING LETS GO

-who the hell is charlie

-is that the like major guy that’s giving them the stuff

-OH EHAT THE FUCK

-“idk i invented it this morning” he’s smart

-EAT PEACE MOTHER FUCKERS

-poor economous just having to watch :(

-THE GORILLA

-HDJSJCKSKJDS

-IM LAUDHISICIWBDIS

-all of them fucking this gorilla up together <3 teamwork babey

-YESSS

-ENONOMOUS CAME IN W THE CHAINSAW LETS GOOO

-ALL OF THRN HAVING FUN TOGETHER IN THE CARTRRT

-🥹 they just mean a lot to me guys

-all of them dancing 🥹🥹

-WAHHHH HARCOURT TAKING A PIC OF THEN :,)

-HEHEHHEHEEH

-the guy who agreed to help murn is making sure chris’ dad stays in jail 🙏🙏

- ew not him trying to gaslight my queen 🙄🙄

-go get larry and get his ass

-“so we can assume butterflies can use any life form as a host” “chihuahua? :D” “probably wouldn’t fit” “would be cool tho!! :3” adrian chase. i have feelings for you. major ones.

-everyone being mean to adrian he’s just silly guys!!!

-he’s not a thimble

-“we can trust him” “what’s his name” “judy” “JUDGE JUDY???”

-“we can trust him!” “so you’ve said” “and plus he’s my uncle” “😳” Hhehehehehe

-WAHHHHH

-HARVOURT MAdE A GC FOR THEM

-NAMED 11TH STREET KIDS

-IM SOBBINGGGGGG

-there’s 11 minutes left in sad

-adrian using the merman emoji hehehe

-“he says it means happy sad and everything in between” WAHHHHH

-:,) he wants to hang out w JFNWKNFKWNFJD

-sorry he wants to hang w leota and she goes “are you trying to fuck me but claiming ur dicks a lesbian or something” JDNSKNFJS

-he framed his first newspaper article about himself.

-guys i’m crying now.

-ok had to pause to send a video crying abt this to tati i don’t wanna play it i don’t want them to be sad

-her almost throwinf the drink up HFJSIJDJRJRJ

-they’re having a beer together :3

-LEOTA HELPING HIM W HARCOURTJSIFNIE

-oh i’m giggling

-“don’t talk about her tits or her pussy” “yeah but…what abt when we’re fucking” STOP ITTTT

-john cena plays christopher smith so we’ll it pisses me off

-“you really aren’t a bad guy. you just use being s fuck as a way to push people away, but if you would just take second and just drop that and be Chris Smith, i think people actuslly might like you” WAHHHHHH

-THEYRE BESTIESSSSSS

-“i just never had this before” “what?” “this, you, you know, giving me advice and having my back” SHES HIS FIRST FRIEND GUYS WAHHH

-I JUST WANT EVERYONE TO BE HAPPY IM SO SCARED

-him crying :(

-leota still planting his diary :(

-NOOOOOOO

-her voicemail to her wife :(

-OH NO

-oh no

-FUCK. she’s using chris’ helmet and she’s gonna see that he’s a fucking butterfly FUCKKKKK

-LEOTA IM SO SCARED FKR HER

-NO

-LEOTA GET THE FUCK OUT GHERE

-OH MO OH NO OH NO

- THATS HOW THE EPISODE ENDS

-WHAT THE GUVK

-i was gonna stop after this episode but i have to start the next one i jsut have to

-end credits

-THE NAME DROPPSSSS STJDISJDNKWNFKS

-silly end credits

OK THOUGHTS ON THID EPISODE: holy fuck! just!!!! OMGGGGG i love leota and i love her bonding w chris (even tho she still put his journal there :/) but FUCK I KNOW SHE DOESNT DIE BC ID BE PISSED BUT NOW I HAVE TO WATCH EP6 TOO

its 6 am so i’m a little tired but my god ALSO harcourt has officially grown on me see i just needed her to get away from that ‘strong girl doesn’t like girl stuff or other people’ thing, strong women r allowed to have friendships and close bonds and stuff !!! and now i lowkey ship her and chris -_- annoying i know hehe

anyways episode 6 time

#s1 ep5 monkey dory #peacemaker 2022 #peacemaker #christopher smith #adrian chase #leota adebayo #b reacts live

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thelovelybitten · 1 year ago

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vera's first watch of south park -- season four (part 2)

jfc i want 2 unalive... slowly

EPISODE 6: THESE THE BOYS ARE SO FERAL BYE messing w the sub with switching names NO KYLE IS SICK :’((((( MY POOR BOY NOT BUTTERS HE’S SUCH A CUTE CARD I LOVE BUTTERS SM miss information…. bffr garrison writing a SMUT FIC BYE MDFNVIFDMIMMVS miss information BYE STAN IS TRYING 2 HELP there’s only so much natural herbs can do :’( “KYLE’S MY BEST FRIEND IN THE WHOLE WORLD” SO TRUE SO TRUE CRYINGGGGG “I’LL GIVE HIM MY KIDNEY I’LL DO IT” stan would die for kyle and that’s on god babe not cartman being the only person in south park that matches kyle SMH kenny and cartman being actual kids ofc cartman won’t give it up “how much is ur life worth to u, kyle” cartman u fucking JACKASS if kyle dies i’m gonna be pissed stan worried abt kyle :’(((((( kenny >:( rightfully so garrison just come out as gay babe it’s not that hard clyde and tacos >>>> kyle’s life this is so fucked ew oh stan is serious he’s gonna get his kidney i forgot abt cartmans pig cartman is so smart okay that kinda slayed stan DON’T CRY “nobody cares if i die” KENNY THAT WAS OUTTA POCKET BUT ALSO SO TRUE MY SON “I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS BULLSHIT. SCREW U GUYS I’M GOING HOME.” PIANO FALLS ON HIM :’( very cartman of u kenny OH THEY KILLING HER OOF wait how is cartman not dead ?!?!?!/! his whole ass kidney was cut off by an eight year old oh they defo put his kidney into kyle’s bod but faked it for cartman epic EPISODE 7 Chef winning U GET THEM KING. Ending racists PERIOD who TF is this teacher Cartman winning debates ??? Weird Oh LMAO THE CLASS AGREES HES A RAT MY FUCKING FAVE KIDS ON TEAM CHEF !!! WENDY, BEBE, CLYDE AND BUTTERS. ICONS Stan obvs on his uncles side but BIG BOO WENDY GET THEM BABY WENDY TELL UR MAN HES AN IDIOT STYLE VS WENDY AND CARTMAN ??? oh this abt to be good cartman tho… fat boo Chef schooling the kiddies (style respectfully) WENDY PROTECTING STYLE SO REAL THUMBS DOWN CARTMAN BOOOOOOOO NOT THE KKK 💀💀💀💀 THE MAYOR RLY DIDNT DO SHIT oh crap leaving it up to the kids WHACK Wendy and cartman in the same frame is just giving me the ICK NO WENDY DONT LAUGH ALL CUTELY AT HIM EW no bc cartman and Wendy together makes me physically I’ll wtf KENNY EATING THE MINTS “FUCK YOU” so real “I don’t think we stand a chance in this debate bc Wendy’s leading the other side” “Dude, ur just saying that bc she’s your gf” TRUE AND REAL Kyle so real for that omg OH SHIT KENNY NOOOO HE EXPLODED NO CRYING not Wendy & Cartman again LORD ARE U TRYING TO TEST ME I WANNA OFF MYSELF WHY IS TREY AND MATT GIVING WENDY AND CARTMAN AN ENEMIES TO LOVERS ARC HES EVERYTHING SHE HATES AND VICE VERSA STAN PLS COME COLLECT UR GF IM GONNA THROW UP MY DINNER NOT THE HAND TOUCH IM UNALIVING I CANT I FUCKING HATE IT HERE NOT WENDY FANTASIZING CARTMAN I WANNA SKIP IT SO BAD BUT I NEED TO HAVE AN HONEST FULL REACTION NOT THE ROLL DOWN THE HILL WENDY WOKE UP IT WAS A DREAM THE LORD SAVED ME FROM THIS HELL Wendy me too bc what the fuck Dunks head in water me too Wendy seeing cartman everywhere and haunting her NOOOOOO Wendy “please don’t let this be happening” I WISH IT WASNT BABY GIRL This KKK stuff is weird “BEBE IM ATTRACTED TO CARTMAN” Bebe IMMEDIATELY SCREAMS THATS MY DAUGHTER SHES THE MOOD no but Bebe is me rn BEBE NO DONT TELL HER TO KISS HIM ?!1?1!1) THE FUCK ARE U DOING Wendy PLEASE DOR THE LOVE OF GOD DONT I DONT NEED THAT IN MY BRAIN PLEASE IM BEGGING WHAT WOULD STAN THINK ??!?!? WENDY ARE U DELULU STANS LOOK OF CONCERN AS HE LOOKS AT WENDY STUTTERING AND PANICKING NO WENDY ARE U FUCKING FOR REAL NOOOOOO STANS FACE NO IM BREAKING IM DESTROYED IM IN SHAMBLES HIS SAD FACE NO STAN IM SOBBINGGGGGG cartman feeling so smug abt Stan’s girl kissing him I know stan is gonna go HAM ON HIS ASS Stan still upset NO I HATE IT HERE I HATE IT CARTMAN IS ADDING FUEL TO THE FIRE TEASING STAN OH STOP IT STAN IS STILL SHOCKED STILL. S T I L L S T I L L S T I L L IM SOBBING AT STAN 😭😭 CARTMAN HAS FEELS FOR WENDY OH FUCK defo my least fave episode out of all seasons so far

#faves: south park #viv watches #NO BECAUSE THE HATE I HAVE FOR THAT FUCKING CARTMAN AND WENDY SHIT MAD ME WANNA THROW UP #i’m also sad abt stan he did NOT DESERVE THAT.#but w the other ep here i felt kenny yelling at stan in my bones he was so real for that

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helloliriels · 2 years ago

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Oooh! Love the Agatha Christie vibe - so tell us about Sad Cypress. And so much Johncentric fic! So can I hear about The Secret Life of John. Watson, too? 💙

Ooh! One of my personal faves (when I ever get around to putting it down on paper, as an ode to Christie).

Sad Cypress

Dr. John Watson writes in his journal about a poison pen letter. One his neighbor, Sherlock received and is unsettled by. It's been preying on John's mind too ... such a wicked thing. The letter.

And it doesn't help, that he's been smitten by the curly haired genius ... who at first glance, appears to be happy ... ?

But deep currents run within this family. And not everything is what it seems.

"You love him Sherlock?" Uncle Rudy asked, a twinkle in his eye. He couldn't move from his bed, but that didn't mean he couldn't see what was going on ...

"I do," Sherlock answered from the window. Watching Victor talk to Mary.

"Enough?" his Uncle inquired, getting worried, "and not ... too much?"

"What?" Sherlock asked, whipping around.

Then he tried to shake it off ... that feeling. That he was loving again, too much ... Being, too much ... and that he would lose Victor ...

"Of course, Uncle."

He laughed it off with a blank face, returning to the window. Where had they gone?

"Enough," he replied, contritely to his Uncle, "and not too much."

....................................................

Thanks for the ask!!! 💋(and ofc! I'll answer both! will post sep.)

#ask games #whats in your WIP folder?#writer asks #tag games #liri answers

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theheightofdishonor · 4 years ago

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Teen Wolf triads are something that can be so personal, so here’s a list of my faves

Scott/Stiles/Allison

The OG trio. The gang that dies together might not stay together, but they’re still iconic.

Scott/Stiles/Lydia

Any Scott/Stiles/X dynamic is brilliant, but few more than this one. These three have been there since the beginning and they’ve gone through so much together. There’s no Teen Wolf without them.

Scott/Stiles/Derek

They were the driving force in S1&2 and had some absolutely iconic moments together. Hate that there wasn’t more of them after that.

Scott/Derek/Isaac

Mostly based on S2/3. I was very invested in Isaac’s struggle to pick between these two.

Scott/Stiles/Isaac

This triad’s dynamic completely changes between S2 and 3. In Season 2, Isaac, as part of Derek’s pack is a slightly antagonistic figure and it’s very much Scott&Stiles vs Isaac but in S3, Scott and Isaac grow closer while Isaac and Stiles erm, don’t. It’s very fun to watch.

Scott/Isaac/Allison

My ot3 and the only trio on this list that I 100% ship.

Isaac/Erica/Boyd

Ayy, it’s the OG Hale Pack aka 3 teens bonding over being thrown headfirst into something they weren’t prepared for and Derek’s horrible leadership. Isaac should’ve ran away with Erica and Boyd for solidarity’s sake.

Chris/Allison/Isaac

Chris’s struggle between hating Isaac for dating his daughter and wanting to adopt him is hilarious. One of my favourites.

Scott/Melissa/Isaac

Who didn’t completely melt at Isaac joining the McCall fam? The scene where they’re ‘guarding’ Melissa was so cute. As a bonus, it made Stiles’s animosity towards Isaac that much stronger. Will forever hate that this trio was more or less non-existent in 3b even though I love Chris/Allison/Isaac.

Derek/Cora/Peter

The non-dead Hales. Why oh why did Cora have to leave? Their family dynamic was great.

Allison/Lydia/Cora

I know they only had a couple scenes as a triad, but there was so potential. We love antagonism with underlying sexual tension. And ofc, the only thing better than 1 terrifying badass that can secretly be super sweet is 3 terrifying badasses.

Derek/Isaac/Boyd

At one point, the only non-dead members of the Hale Pack (TW quickly amended that). I always think of the S3a Loft scene where Boyd and Isaac skip school to protect Derek. Despite how awful of an alpha Derek’s been, they still care about him and he cares about them (as actual people and not just betas that he needs for power like he did originally)

Derek/Allison/Lydia.

Yes it’s my 5th s3 based trio in a row, but can you blame me? This is 100% based off the classroom scene in 3x02.

Allison/Lydia/Jackson

Although Lydia and Jackson were both awful in S1, their friendship with Allison and their immediately taking her under their wing was beyond precious. Additionally, it combines both the asshole-who’s-soft-towards-1-person- dynamic (jydia w/ allison) and assholes-who-secretly-care-about-each-other (jydia) And ofc, the underlying tension due to Jydia’s disdain towards Scott and later, Jackson and Allison’s experiences/knowledge of the supernatural.

Malia/Kira/Lydia

Comedy gold. Their scenes speak for themselves and we needed more.

Liam/Mason/Corey

Their S6a dynamic is sooo underrated and should’ve been given more screen time. I loved watching Liam and Corey struggle to get along for Mason’s sake because they want him to be happy. It was all very wholesome and one of the few things that made 6a worth watching.

Stiles/Scott/Liam

Aka the best part of S4.Their dynamic is so fun and well-balanced and infinitely better because they’re a triad. You’ve got Scott and Liam figuring out their mentor/mentee relationship with Stiles co-parenting and preventing the Scott/Liam dynamic from turning unhealthy. (Liam and Scott’s S6 dynamic veered way too close to parent/child for my taste. They need Stiles to balance it out) It’s also hilarious how quickly Liam accepts being aggressively adopted by two idiots who are barely older than him. And Stiles takes so easily to playing older brother/co-parent. It’s adorable. They’re adorable.

Erica/Allison/Lydia

Very similar dynamic to Allison/Lydia/Cora due to Cora and Erica’s similar personalities but also not, which has a lot to do with Allison and Lydia’s reactions to Erica’s weaponized feminity. Also, there’s a lot more history between these girls and I want to know everything about what Erica thinks of Lydia after going to school with her for years.

Sherriff/Melissa/Chris

Of the top of my head, I can only remember that time where they were trapped under the Nemeton and that’s simply unacceptable.

Sheriff/Noshiko/Melissa.

It’s a crime that this triad never got scenes. Especially after the Sheriff tried to arrest Kira. I know Melissa bitch slapped him but I wanted to watch these two badasses gang up on the Sheriff together. ( the Noshiko/Melissa dynamic would be so iconic.)

Victoria/Noshiko/Melissa

Another triad that never shared scenes (obviously because Vic is dead) but their power would’ve been off the charts. I want to make a joke about milfs, but I’ll refrain.

The Yukimura fam

Seemed appropriate since my last two also included. Noshiko.I love family dynamics and the Yukimuras are no exception. The attraction of this triad, for me, is mostly the dynamic between Kira and Noshiko and how Ken navigates between them. They’re also a trio that we didn’t see nearly enough of in S4 and 5. Like seriously, where were they? Noshiko’s on the dead pool, but she’s barely mentioned. (on a mostly unrelated note, how is the 900 yr old Kitsune worth less than a girl that just found about her kitsune powers?)

Derek/Allison/Scott

I don’t need to explain this one. The angst, the drama, Derek projecting Kate onto Allison and Allison trying to murder Derek and their evolution to reluctant allies with a good dash of Scallison and Scott navigating his own difficult relationship with Derek. Aka the complicated, tension fraught trio we all loved/should love. ( ok, I kind of explained it)

Derek/Scott/Liam

And here we have a two for one deal; two mentor/mentee dynamics in 1 triad. People much smarter than me have written about this trio in extensive detail, so all I’m saying is that Derek’s that one uncle who occasionally comes around and gives somewhat helpful advice.

Braeden/Malia/Scott

Braeden and Scott were great in S4. Braeden and Malia were great in S5. Scott and Malia are pretty great when they’re not in a relationship. Combine, and you get what had to be a kick-ass triad that’s sadly never canonly shown together (I think)

Melissa/Chris/Isaac

Not actually featured in the show, but Isaac deserves all the parental figures and I want to witness the surely epic custody battle between Chris and Melissa.

Malia/Scott/Peter

That this trio is on here is actually pretty funny because I hate both Scalia and the forced Peter/Malia bonding in S6. But I loved the scene where Peter warned Malia not to fall in love with Scott because a) he has absolutely 0 right to advise her on anything and b) because of the history between Scott and Peter. In a way, a relationship with Malia is just another thing tying Scott to someone that’s repeatedly caused harm to him and his friends and was the initial cause for all the pain he’s suffered in the last couple years. I just find this dynamic worth exploring.

Malia/Derek/Peter

The Hales 2.0. Derek and Malia deserve to bond over unwillingly being related to Peter, that scumbag.

Malia/Stiles/Peter

Stiles and Peter are so fun together and Stalia is my jam. Throw in an antagonistic Malia and Peter relationship and they’re entertaining as hell. Much more lighthearted than Malia/Scott/Peter.

Stiles/Malia/Lydia

To clarify, this has nothing to do with a love triangle and everything to do with how their personalities play off each other. It’s one of those trios where together, they’re either terrifying or absolute morons.

Stiles/Cora/Derek

Admittedly, my version of this is very Sterek+Cora and the hilarity of Stiles and his attraction to Hales but it’s also 3x snark and you really can’t go wrong.

Scott/Stiles/Melissa

It’s Melissa and her boys 1.0. This woman is by far the best parent on this show, and I love the specific dynamic among these three. Melissa might not always like Stiles, but she cares about him and there’s the mutual understanding that they both adore Scott and would do anything for him. Also, Mel being exasperated by the dumbass duo is always funny.

Kate/Allison/Chris

Lowkey another custody battle because Kate and Chris do fight to be the bigger influence on Allison This is such a tragic trio to me, and the lesson here is basically that sometimes love isn’t enough. Chris and Kate both genuinely love Allison and she loves them too but can’t have both and at some point, she has neither. Kate and Chris care about each other, but that’s not enough either. In the end, they all lose each other. There’s no happy ending for them, at least not with each other.

Derek/Stiles/Peter

Stiles just has chemistry (not necessarily romantic) with all Hales and this trio really shines through in 3x01 and in S3 in general. “Chess is Stiles’s game” asgdhfjgh. I wanted more of that very specific dynamic.

That was a hell lot longer than I thought it would be, but what can you do. Feel free to tell me your own opinions in the tags/comments.

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yeehawkins · 3 years ago

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top five bands!!!

i hav been awokened >:3

as a bonus: linking my favorite song from all of these artists in their name! hard choice for metallica njkdfbs but stil (I have many a faves from all of them! but pretty clear-cut have an idea of The fave for the rest)

Depeche Mode- I always liked 80's music, but when I heard a DM song in a playlist one day, something about it really gripped me. That song being my favorite song of all time now (is the song linked lol) and 14 albums later listened to, my favorite band of all time. I say 14 since I've heard every single album of theirs by now, but really after the first 2 (hell even just the first) I was hooked. I cannot believe I've been so deeply in love with this band since high school and that love is still so strong 🖤

Metallica- I've babbled about my story with these dudes before, but will give the short of it again. Uncle played a few songs for me when I was a kid, heard a few more songs when I was way older, watched a compilation of the members being himbos, listened to some albums, fell madly in anger love. I never pictured myself getting into Metallica (or metal at all) but I'm so glad I have, this band has honestly helped me realize so much about myself 🥺

Foo Fighters- I'd almost say me getting into FF was a combo of the first two bands oOo. I knew and really liked some songs beforehand, didn't get too into the first album I heard, but then one day The Sky is a Neighborhood was in my recommended on youtube. The video banged and so did the song (not actually the song I linked but check that one out too lole). Most recent concert I've been to as well and I've never gotten that emotional at one before. and ofc Dave Grohl is simply an incredible dude, both in talent and in heart

Shinedown- Most recent addition of these! I could probably babble quite a bit of how I got into them but will also gibe the short of it here. Friend I had in middle school liked them, I was ehh on the one song I tried. Mutual on here liked the same song I had listened to. Relistened to that song + heard the whole album, heard other albums and got obsessed. Been bumping a lotta their songs recently. Don't got anything else #deep, they just bop!

Ninja Sex Party- Second concert I ever went to!! and prolly the closest I'll ever be to the front of a concert 😎. Also not much #deep here; I knew about Dan from Game Grumps and then checked out NSP. I admittedly listen to their covers a bit more but man the original songs just keep getting better and better! I just love Dan's voice a ton (actually still gotta check out more of his new project, Shadow Academy)

put “top 5” anything in my ask

#woag is me #I KNOW I TOOK A HOT MINUTE TO ANSWER SRRY #also helo have subjected my followers to my music taste njkdfbs #which i am. v insecure about but i feel you deserved some babbling <3 #ik i didn't babble for the other asks but i feel like this one warranted it #thamk you bea uwu 💖#zoomybeans

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avenger-hawk · 4 years ago

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Hi you have a great understanding of Sasuke's character and awesome blog. Could I ask you for tips on how to write Sasuke right in fanfiction? When I try I never seem to get him right

Hello and thanks Anon. First of all, y’all don’t get offended if I’ll destroy some of your fave tropes in fics...I don’t judge ppl writing what they want in their fics, it’s their own fic so ofc they write what they want and how they want it and if they have fun with gay-uncle-Izuna, CEOItachi and sluttySasuke good for them...but when ppl impose their OOC Sasuke (or Nar or Itachi&co) as the real thing, and boy if they do....well. Nope.

Anyway I replied to similar asks here, here and here, so I’ll copy-paste some parts. My Sasuke tag. More Sasuke meta. More headcanons. More essays tag.

Sasuke is not dominant. He’s not bossy. He’s not assertive. He’s very passive in relationships and he values individual freedom, his own and other people’s. Ppl mistake his determination in pursuing his goals with assertiveness but it’s a totally different thing. He never makes the first move with ppl, unless he has a goal and he needs them, and even when he needs them, like Taka, he never imposes his will on them. He first freed them then he asked their help for his own goal, saying that he would accept if they refused. He never imposed himself on his brother (a child wanting his big brother’s attention is not being dominant, it’s natural) and he never did it on Nar or anyone else.

Sasuke is not selfish, he is the most selfless character in the whole series. He respected people, he didn’t see himself above them. He didn’t see himself as a genius or anything. He worked hard because he had a low self esteem, he was always compared to Itachi and he always lost. He was humble enough to ask others’ help, like asking N*ruto how S*kura was able to climb the tree with chakra in the beginning, or asking Team Taka’s help to find Itachi, asking Kakashi to make him stronger and following Orochimaru for more strength. And during all these, he was thrown in his face parts of the tragic truth about Itachi and his clan and he always had to get back on his feet and fight more. His world crumbled so many times on him and yet not only he reacted but he always was able to help those around him. Not with big words like N*ruto but really, freeing Orochimaru’s prisoners, Taka, and earlier protecting his team from Gaara, protecting N*ruto from Haku, and later proitecting N*ruto from Kaguya and then protecting the whole world from her, protecting Itachi’s ideal, his sacrifice from those who threatened to make it useless. He was ready to become the world’s only enemy to keep them together, following what he thought Itachi had taught him indirectly.

Sasuke is neither possessive nor jealous. He never showed any sign of possessiveness or jealousy towards anyone. He protected Taka and N*ruto. He defended Itachi’s name, unlike too many like to think: when he threatens Danzo to stop talking about Itachi it’s not because he’s jealous but because he doesn’t want that bastard to talk shit about his perfect brother, especially cause that bastard was the reason of his ruin. He was defending his name from an enemy and it was pure and selfless, not possessive at all! Proof of this is when Hashirama praises him instead, Sasuke is happy. He likes people to speak about his brother in a good way! When they were children Itachi always dismissed Sasuke who pouted but never got really angry or jealous at Shisui for example. And at the end of the fight vs Kabuto he aknowledged Itachi’s resolve to leave even tho it broke his heart to lose him again, and he let Itachi go with the saddest face but the utmost respect.

Sasuke is not arrogant. He has a low self-esteem. He was raised in the shadow of his genius brother, he suffered for his father not noticing him, he later developed an inferiority complex towards N*ruto as well because of his quick progress, compared to his own that he perceived as slower and not enough (that’s why he joined Orochimaru). When he brags it’s not because he’s the bragging type (aka N*ruto, Kiba &co) but it’s because he’s either making fun of N*ruto, since they were rivals/friends (not to mention it’s a shounen trope) and, even more so, because he is proud of his achievements. He worked so hard always and when he created a jutsu or smth he says it. Because he has low self esteem but he’s not socially awkward or shy or whatever (see later paragraph). So he is proud of his own results. (which is also a very TE thing, for those who care about mbti stuff).

Sasuke doesn’t value his life much. This is a result of his low self-esteem, which leads to poor sense of self-preservation (to prove that he’s strong, like when he was a genin and he trained so hard,and later to pursue his goals, for which he’d give his body to Orochimaru and his life over and over). Also he is so determined to achieve his goals that he’d do anything for them. He was ready to die on many occasions in canon for this and even later, after the ending, he’s seeing himself as a tool. Also, he never really got over the sense of worthlessness first caused by his father and then by Itachi’s words the night of the massacre. Not in a real life trauma-like thing, but as a way to see himself. this means that all those stereotypical rocking back and forth, cutting, whatever behaviors are not like him, who always got back to his feet and lived, although not for himself but for his goals.

Sasuke is not bitchy or spoiled. If he was he would have a great self esteem, and he clearly showed to have a very low self esteem instead. He never made anything about him actually, as all his goals were about others, his family, his brother, and so on. He was the one who did better teamwork in team7 actually, and he protected his friends and comrades, not to mention he freed Orochimaru’s prisoners and fought for the village and its people. How is this spoiled or bitchy, and btw, bitchy ppl do get offended and he never paid attention to offenses towards him, only towards his brother.

Sasuke is neither the haughty élite type nor the shy/socially anxious/‘emo’ type. He is neither Neji nor H*nata. He is aloof, he is always lost in his own thoughts and he doesn’t care about socializing because he wants to become strong, because he cared more about his family and goals, because he cared more about their opinion than the opinion of classmates. He valued strength since the beginning, being raised the way he was raised, so he valued the praise of strong people and not of the others, unlike those who seek praise from everyone. On the other hand his being aloof doesn’t mean he can’t have normal interactions, and the fact that he doesn’t use honorifics doesn’t mean he has socialization problems. Only that he doesn’t pay attention to these things anymore. He was always pragmatic, and after the massacre he became pragmatic to an extreme level, cutting off all unnecessary things, manners included. It doesn’t mean, though, that he doesn’t respect some people (=those he deems strong. Including Team Taka). He just shows it through actions.

Sasuke is not se/xually aggressive/dominant/whatever. He is too busy with his own goals to have se/xual or romantic thoughts (unlike other characters both male and female, not just Karin but also S*kura, Ino, and ofc N*ruto). I wouldn’t define this being asexual tho, because their universe is not ours and I’m sick&tired of all the real world/Nar universe parallels. He’s passive in relationship and on many occasions he showed indifference to se/xual anything, not disgust. Just, it wasn’t his thought. Because he is on a different wavelength. So even when he told characters to not be so close to him or smth, he didn’t move away, he just told them, which kinda proves my point once more of how passive he is towards ppl and relationships, he just lets them be. On the other hand, aceSas is better than hornydominantSas that is so OOC it hurts, be it with Itachi, Nar, S*kura or whatever other girls/boys.

Most MAIN characters didn’t understand/didn’t try to understand him. The ones who understood him more are unexpectedly not his friends. Not counting Taka ofc.

Sasuke is passive. He is the yin and N*ruto is the yang. In case this isn’t clear. It’s canon. Kishi used a yin/yang parallel for him and N*ruto, so while N*ruto is yang/sun/warm/ positive/active/male principle in nature/masculine, Sasuke is yin/moon/cold/negative/passive/passive/female principle in nature/feminine. Passive doesn’t mean weak. It means receptive, adaptable, flexible, which Sasuke is, since he’s the one who adapted his life and goals to new events, truths and changes, unlike most others who just kept going their own way no matter what (see N*ruto or Itachi). Many see him as assertive because he faces every situation in a very determined manner, taking actions and deciding everything independently. But being an independent thinker has nothing to do with being assertive or passive. I say he’s passive because he actually always reacts to what life (or Itachi) throws at him, every time. His reactions are quick and strategic, so it’s easy to miss this, but still, again, Itachi or N*ruto actively engage the environment and life, and influence other people, not Sasuke. He’s also passive with people, in relatioships. He never seeks anyone unless it’s for practical reasons, he only reacts to them approaching him. And he reacts in a very calm way, quite mild compared to how determined and detached he is, considering that a lot of characters invade his personal space or more, in the whole series. When he chases after Itachi it’s because he’s his younger brother and it’s natural for them, and mostly because Itachi set up his life so that he would focus on him, still it’s Itachi who is assertive, and he reacts in return. He makes a deal with Orochimaru, to obtain strength and give him his body in return. When he forms Team Taka, before asking their help, he first gives them freedom and only then he asks them to join him, making it clear that he won’t force them if they’ll refuse. He gives them something before asking something in return. This is not just a passive thing but something more because he is not selfish, like I said before.

Sasuke is an independent thinker. Unlike other smart thinkers like Itachi or Madara, to whom the story associated him, Sasuke was kept in the dark about many things, so he developed his own view of the world later, but when he did it was original and unique, just like his fighting style and strategy.

Sasuke is private about his thoughts and feelings but he’s also honest about them. Itachi is mysterious and not honest about his feelings, not him. He is aloof, it’s different. Just because he doesn’t trust many people and he’s lost in his own thoughts it doesn’t mean he is a shoujo mysterious character lol.

Sasuke is goal oriented. He does whatever it takes to achieve his goals. He would have given his body as a vessel for Orochimaru, not caring about what would happen to him, as long as he could have his revenge. He would have lived an eternity in solitude so that the world would have lived in peace. And, again, his goals are never about himself.

Sasuke wanted to die after he killed Itachi, but then when he woke up and was told the truth he had another purpose, and so he lived on.

Sasuke admires and respects strength but he’s not power thirsty. He wanted to become strong because he wanted to be worthy of Itachi and his father, than because he had to avenge his clan, then he had to avenge Itachi. It’s because he had low self-esteem and was selfless that he sought power. He wanted to be beside his father and brother, not to surpass them, actually. It’s Itachi who talked about surpassing.

Sasuke is very smart and logical, but he is easily manipulated with the right arguments. Like using Itachi, or appealing to his low self esteem, his feeling of worthlessness, his emotions. Because people who are logical are actually not emotionless. In fact they have a hard time controlling their emotions when they feel strongly, and this can be seen clearly every time Sasuke loses control. He becomes more impulsive than N*ruto who instead gets calmer, because he’s more in touch with his emotions (lol ofc he is, everything is always about his own emotions and feelings). Sasuke puts his feelings and emotions aside to reach his goals, he acts logically and pragmatically, he observes, makes plans, finds the better ways to do things, no matter how hard or dangerous for him they are. He has logical arguments even though they appear ‘crazy’ to other characters, and it’s sad to see how in the end he was belittled by N*ruto, as if his arguments were meaningless, they were not addressed at all, just deemed wrong, not with counterarguments but with illogical emotion based words that just made him feel unstable, as it happens when you have logical arguments and they tell you ‘you’re just depressed, you don’t get things right’.

In the end, he was tamed into submission. He was defeated, put in jail, isolated, guilt tripped and berated because of his ideals and goals, denied the justice he rightfully demanded.

All these can be observed directly. Others, more subtle things about him I wrote here, towards the end of this long post.

#sasuke #I don’t have much motivation to reply to asks tbh but this is important I guess #Anonymous #vivalarevolution: visions #vivalarevolution #vivalarevolution: not crazy but desperate

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