#(which I’m no longer going on THANKS COVID)

[mysteriouslyjovialcolor]

Bahrain 2020

-Trying to watch this race but they just keep showing an airplane flying around the sky

-Covid really made everything leading up to the race feel so quiet

-Aaaah Red Bull second row lockout! Let’s go Alex p4!!

-Actually paying attention to the Rolex clock at the beginning of the race now -you’re telling me we’re no longer getting that??

-“Always love a start where we’ve got teammates side by side” Yes! Me too!

-Ahhh love watching cars weave

-“I like the thought of Sebastian being a sly cunning old fox” I think of him more as a big cat actually (maybe a lynx?)

-Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, this is that race, the race with that crash, ohmygod

-I’ve seen multiple clips of this crash far before I even started watching formula one but god it’s hitting so much worse right now

-I really wasn’t expecting that. I had no idea which race that crash happened in

-Oh bloody hell, I can’t imagine the feeling of watching that live

-Oh he’s out, oh god

-God I can’t imagine how tense the drivers must’ve been feeling

-How crazy that he’s able to stand up straight after that

-He really was blessed that day

-God the Haas team all look so scared

-Crazy how the commentators just keep going too, that must’ve been really hard in those circumstances

-Never thought, when I watched that accident before, that it was a lap one accident

-How on earth did all of the drivers just keep driving calmly after witnessing that

-Oh watching that from the onboards is sickening, even if they did cut before the impact

-Did they really continue the race after this? Cause that just seems crazy

-Oh bless the medical team, the marshals, and all the other workers for being so quick at the site

-I’m still kind of in shock and I can’t believe the race is actually starting again

-Impressive how they’ve managed to swap that many places so seamlessly before the start

-Still a bit confused on how the order of the restart was actually decided but let’s go racing I guess

-Woah didn’t expect Max to keep that place!

-Daniel? Where are you going??

-Safety car????? Oh shit he’s upside down

-“That’s Kvyat’s second contact in this race then”

-“Should’ve crashed, maybe it was a better option?” Sebastian?

-“Oh dear, oh dear”

-CS: “What a race, thank god he’s okay”

-Honestly it’s been so chaotic. I still have no idea what happened to Sebastian, Valterri has dropped down to p16, it looked painful for Lance- coming out of the car, and apparently Kevin has damage.

-“Max was like- okay however late you break, I’m going to break later” Genuinely was cool how he stuck to p2

-I’m going to cry, we’re only 7 laps in. How did anyone survive this live?

-Cars weaving again >>>

-“Lando Norris has made up 5 places” My guy just appeared out of nowhere

-Okay safety car finally coming in

-Let’s go racing….again

-Woah! Charles and Esteban!!

-“Gets out his oversized elbows and keeps the position” Lol that was so uncalled for

-“Ricciardo, not enjoying these opening stages” Yeah, me neither

-The way Carlos is hanging on to Charles’ rear wheels right now is crazy

-It’s so funny how they were so confident about the Mercedes being the greatest car ever created (which like, it is) that they thought they didn’t even need to consider how it did in traffic

-“My car is just jumping around like a kangaroo I swear”

-Aaaa Carlos!! Ohmygodd Daniel too??

-“Carlos Sainz is really making those soft tires sing isn’t he?” He is!

-Okay I have to conclude now that something is wrong with that Ferrari- no way Charles just got overtaken by three cars back to back

-Yeah Sebastian’s saying it’s un-driveable. He’s also p17, which is horrifying.

-Daniel pitting early? That’s new

-Okay now everyone’s in the pits

-Did Max just pit and still come back p2?

-Oooh Gasly p5

-Damn Alex is on fire- actually wait, poor choice of words, I mean he’s doing amazing!

-He’s made it back to p4

-Also Valterri, back to p6

-Oh- nvm, go Lando! P6! Don’t think Valterri has pit yet actually

-That move from Carlos was lovelyyy

-Both McLarens have been moving with so much pace right now

-DR: “Why are we racing each other? I think we need to do something.”

-Don’t know how team orders is really going to help now, both McLarens have high tailed it away from them

-The race is finally slowing down (as much as race can)- lap 34 and I think this is where live spectators could probably start to breathe

-Never mind, Max is pitting again, nothing ever slows down in this world

-I knowww the McLarens still have to pit, but seeing Alex in p6 after that stop still makes me annoyed

-So funny seeing the Renaults fight

-🎶Danny back in points🎶

-Woah Alex! Let’s go babyyy!

-Haha the way Carlos groaned when he came back out behind Charles

-Well that didn’t last very long

-Oh come on Valterri, why would you break the Renaults apart like that

-Max pitting again?

-“Gasly 2.8 let’s go and get him.”

CS: “Yeah that will be easy” Hot

-There was mention of the McLaren “Germany incident”. I really need to know more

-SP: “Are you falling asleep? Wake up, wake up” “Yes Checo, we’re here”

-PG: “Give me all the power”

-Woah the sparks from Daniel’s car

-Oh bloody hell what’s wrong with Checo’s car?

-Oh shit he’s literally on fire

-Safety car :(

-Was gonna mention how Pierre’s strategy kinda failed and his tires are dying but I guess this helps him

-That’s actually so much fire- out of nowhere

-Lewis pitting? Or not

-Ugh I feel so bad for Racing Point

-Can’t fully be excited for Alex podium considering the circumstances buttt Alex p3!!

-This is my first Alex podium!!

-Gonna be delusional and use this to manifest a 2025 Alex win

-LN: “There’s a guy running across the track!” “That’s the bravest guy I’ve ever seen” “Brave or stupid?”

-Right puncture for Valterri? How??

-At least it’s the last lap. Everyone who has problems can safely cross the line

-Is this Alex’ first podium? I need to watch Alex’ first podium

-MV: “Good job to Alex on p3”

-Oooh fireworks

[windowsandfeelings]

I don’t feel super sick anymore (just a little sick) but I am COMPLETELY BONE DEEP EXHAUSTED in a way where I have barely left my bed for days and all I’ve done is stare at my phone and tv and nap.

[pussymasterdooku]

.

[elfyelation]

𝐢'𝐦 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 | oneshot

pairing—astarion x m!tav summary—when tav falls ill, everyone at camp is surprised to find that astarion is intent on staying by his side until he’s better warnings—illness, mention of poison, soft astarion, worried astarion, worried party, hurt/comfort, extensive use of pet names, super soft, extreme fluff word count—754 rating—teen note—this is entirely self-indulgent because i’ve been really ill this past week (thanks covid) and the whole time i was thinking about how astarion would comfort tav if he was hurt/sick so i came up with the idea for this

“How is he?” he asks and for what might be the first time, she can hear sincerity in his voice.

“Better,” the cleric sighed, “He’s getting better but he’ll still need some time to recover. You can sit with him but if I see those fangs of yours anywhere near him—”

Astarion rolled his eyes and folded his arms over his chest. "I assure you, Shadowheart, my intentions are far from what you seem to believe. I would never harm Tav. Surely that much has become clear to you by now?"

The sceptical half-elf hummed, “I suppose he will be safe enough for now. Even if your concern for him was a lie I doubt you’d want to risk sucking up any poison that might still be loitering in his veins.”

He knew she had every right to be distrusting of him, especially when it came to Tav’s safety. He only hoped one day they would all finally see just how much Tav really meant to him. That his feelings weren’t a lie. Until then, he’d have to make do with their concern over their friend and his questionable taste in partners.

“A… Astarion?” His weak voice croaked out the moment the vampire spawn ducked inside the tent.

Tav was laying on the blankets, his body completely sweat-ridden as his face contorted with discomfort. He was in still pain, still so vulnerable.

Astarion was by his side in an instant, his cold hands reaching out to gently touch his lover’s forehead. “Don’t worry, darling, I’m here. I’m right here.”

The cool touch of his hand was welcome as it immediately began to cool Tav’s fever. Gale had already expressed his suspicion that it would do as much. There certainly were at least a few perks of being undead.

“Let’s cool you down, shall we?” He wasted no time removing his shirt before crawling down beside his lover. One strong arm gently wrapped around Tav and pulled him closer, hoping that the coldness of his skin would help ease at least some of the pain.

Tav's laboured breaths finally began to slow as he nestled into the embrace, finding solace in the chill of Astarion's body. His fingers wrapped themselves around the cool arm around him, pulling it closer to his chest.

The vampire spawn chuckled against his ear. “Easy, little love, I’m not going anywhere.” His fingers traced delicate patterns on Tav's forehead, willing the fever to subside.

Outside the tent, Shadowheart kept a close eye on the pair and, in doing so, her initial scepticism gradually gave way to a begrudging acceptance of the vampire's genuine concern. She couldn't deny the tenderness she saw in Astarion's eyes as he cared for their companion. It was a side of him she hadn't seen before. A side of him she hadn’t even known was there.

Maybe it wasn’t just about self preservation or sexual desire. Just maybe he truly did care for Tav. She never thought love was something he was capable of but the longer she watched them, the more she realised just how wrong she had been.

Soon enough, his lover was sound asleep in his arms. Sleeping without a sign of pain or discomfort. It was the first time he’d slept properly since his affliction which meant Shadowheart was right, he was getting better.

“You know, you really scared me for a moment there. I… I thought I was going to lose you. I don’t want to go through that again.”

He spoke despite knowing there was no one to hear him. Speaking to a sleeping lover who, as if on instinct, rolled over to snuggle closer into him.

"I'll protect you with everything I have, my love," Astarion murmured, "I promise you that. You mean more to me than I ever thought possible." He knew that Tav couldn't hear him, but the words were as much for himself as they were for his lover.

Astarion had always been a creature of darkness, bound by instinct and desire. Forced to do his cynical master’s bidding. Yet, in Tav's presence, he had found a glimmer of something different, something more profound. It was a love he never thought he deserved, but now that he had it, he would do anything to defend it.

And so, beneath the starlit sky, Astarion held Tav close, vowing silently to cherish every moment they had together, determined to prove that his love was not just words but a promise to protect and endure, no matter the cost.

[theemporium]

💰 charlos finding out that their sugar baby is sick and pampering her with the best items they can find, constantly sending medicine, etc.

totally not inspired by me having COVID rn

thank you for requesting!🫶🏽

.

You were stupid for thinking the maid would take the puppy dog eyes in full stride and not report back to your boyfriends.

The boys had been away for a double race weekend when you found yourself coming down with something. It hit you far harder than you expected and after a whole week of trying to push through it, you found yourself in bed with snotty tissues and a cough that made your chest feel like it was caving in. 

It was rough. And it sucked to go through alone, but you didn’t want your boys to feel bad. You had managed to avoid long calls or facetime attempts fairly well since it was the last week before they flew back. But what you failed to realise was that the maid who the boys hired to come by and clean the apartment a few days a week would snitch you out to her bosses. 

The messages you received from Charles and Carlos were a mix of concern for your condition and disappointment for you hiding your condition from them. You apologised and told them you couldn’t wait to see them when you were better (which only upset them further when you insisted that they weren’t allowed to see you at risk they would get sick). 

The race on Sunday had been at a fairly decent time, but the flu had knocked you out before a third of the race had even passed. 

You woke up hours later when the sun was no longer in the sky and the snotty tissues on the bed had been replaced with bags and boxes. Multiple bags and boxes that had designer labels on them no matter where you looked. 

Your brows furrowed together in confusion. 

“Ah, mon amour, you’re awake,” a voice sounded to the side of you, and you had little time to react before Charles was placing a kiss on your forehead before cupping your face in his hands. “Hm, your temperature seems to be getting better.”

“Charles?” You mumbled, blinking a few times before everything seemed to click together. “Oh my god—”

You had completely missed the race. Not only that, you had been asleep so long that the boys were able to fly home and apparently turn your bedroom into the next designer outlet.

“You need to leave,” you breathed out before you began to shake your head. “I’m going to get you and Carlos sick—”

Charles frowned as he reached for you. “Baby—”

“—and then you won’t be able to race and…oh my god,” you shuffled away from the boy, looking around the bed in confusion. “What—”

“You must think so little of us if you think we are going to leave you when you’re sick,” a second voice spoke up and your head snapped around to find Carlos standing in the doorway, a tray of food in his hands.

“Carlos—” You started but he quickly interrupted. 

“You’re ours, amor,” Carlos stated simply. “You’re ours to care for and spoil and look after. And that’s exactly what we will do.”

“But your races,” you argued weakly, sniffling a little but you didn’t fight it this time when Charles reached for you and pulled you against his chest.

“We’ll be fine for our races,” Charles reassured you before pressing another quick kiss against your cheek. “Now let us take care of our girl.”

You sighed and both boys grinned triumphantly. 

“The gifts are over the top though,” you told them with a shake of your head. “You need to return them.”

Carlos scoffed. “I think the fever is making you delusional, mi amor. Now eat up, you need the energy to recover.”

“Carlos—” You started but Charles shushed you with another kiss.

“We lost the receipts,” he lied badly before grinning. “And personally I think the little red set would make you feel much better—”

“Maybe when I’m not coughing up a lung,” you snorted. 

“I can be patient,” Charles retorted with a grin.

Carlos snorted. “Sure, amor, sure.”

.

[kiwiana-writes]

WIP Wednesday

Thanks @cha-melodius and @three-drink-amy for the tags! And… look. I want it on record that this is all railmedaddy’s fault, okay? OC POV/Outsider POV you terrify me but here we are.

(Okay, MAYBE I was the one who sent a voice note talking about the fact that while I understand why CMQ didn’t include it in the book given it was still in the future when they wrote and published, in a covid-free 2020 the Tokyo Olympics should have happened during the timeframe of the book, somewhere around LA/pre-Lakehouse; and that the Paris Olympics aren’t mentioned but would be, per the timeline in the bonus chapter, around/right before they get engaged; and that’s INTERESTING, three Olympics covering their rivals - FWB - lovers arc. But what I’m actually writing? THAT is Rae’s fault, hands down.)

Rio de Janeiro, 2016

Ari Katene never realised how many famous people go to the Olympics.

Pretty fucking stupid, when he thinks about it. Of course they do. But when he was little, the Olympics was just the thing his family crowded around the TV to watch once every four years, muttering about timezones as they did so; when he got a bit older and started taking diving seriously, when he started getting noticed and his coach started talking about the Commonwealth Games as a real possibility, the Olympics became a goal. He was no longer thinking about who may or may not be there, but on how he could be there.

And here he is. Representing his country on the biggest stage there is—even if it is in a sport Aotearoa has never actually medalled in. But it doesn’t seem to matter that no one’s expecting him to place; there are celebrities everywhere, and they’re all keen to chat with an Olympian. Any Olympian.

Which Ari is, now. Fucking wild.

He’s been trying to stay in the zone for the most part, ahead of the finals later today, but he can’t resist taking the chance to grab a selfie with Alex and June Claremont-Diaz. He hasn’t been paying a whole lot of attention so the circus that is the US election campaign, especially given his full-on training schedule all year, but even he’s aware of who the nominees are—and that if America actually elects Ellen Claremont instead of fucking it up, that selfie is going to be a pretty big brag in a few months.

Tagging @agame-writes @affectionatelyrs @anincompletelist @blueeyedgrlwrites @cactusdragon517

@celeritas2997 @clottedcreamfudge @cricketnationrise @dumbpeachjuice @everwitch-magiks

@firenati0n @getmehighonmagic @happiness-of-the-pursuit @hgejfmw-hgejhsf @indestructibleheart

@inexplicablymine @junebugclaremontdiaz @larkral @leaves-of-laurelin @lilythesilly

@littlemisskittentoes @lizzie-bennetdarcy @myheartalivewrites @ninzied @nocoastposts

@nontoxic-writes @notspecialbabe @orchidscript @piratefalls @porcelainmortal

@read-and-write- @rmd-writes @sherryvalli @ships-to-sail @sparklepocalypse

@stereopticons @thesleepyskipper @thinkof-england

@tintagel-or-cockleshells @welcometololaland @whimsymanaged and, as always, anyone who wants to play! (If you take the open tag please tag me so I can see!!)

[djarins-cyare]

✨Questions Tag Game✨

Thanks for tagging me @burntheedges 🩵

Of course I’m going to add GIFs and images. Did anyone really expect me to post something without visual aids??

[photos are my own (apart from the one immediately below, which is from here), and unless otherwise credited, GIFs were made by me during office hours when I was supposed to be working… 🤫]

Do you make your own bed?

Not in terms of making it look all neat and tucked in, no. But that’s because I’m a teensy bit of a germaphobe, and humans naturally sweat at night, which means you must leave your mattress uncovered for a while after you get up to ensure it airs. So, for most of the day (because I forget to straighten it up), my bed just looks like this:

(Just for fun, how many Mandalorians can you spot in the pic?)

Favourite number?

It’s always been 2, and my reasoning used to be that all good things come in pairs. But having discovered my autism in recent years, I’ve come to realise it probably more likely represents the maximum number of people I’m most comfortable interacting with at any one time. So it’s a manageable number. It’s also an even number. And it’s a prime number (in fact it's the only even prime number). It’s a pretty number – it has a nice curved top and a solid, sturdy base. It stops 1 from being lonely, so it’s a kind number.

Is this a weird answer? All of these are really logical reasons to me!

[GIF found here]

What’s your job?

It’s become so specialised that I no longer have a job title, but I started as a legal PA for one of the senior partners at a Legal 500 law firm in London. I flirted with the idea of qualifying as a solicitor but realised there was no way in hell I’d be comfortable standing up in court and speaking in front of lots of people (and I work in the criminal law department so not keen on casually chatting to criminals either). Instead, I decided to become The Person Who Knows Everything.

So now I write briefs to Counsel, proofs of evidence, funding applications; I analyse evidence, conduct legal research, advise the solicitors on their cases; I train paralegals and admin staff; I do a load of data analysis and make pretty spreadsheets for the bosses; and I manage the firm’s IT needs because I can do computer stuff too. I’m basically their go-to girl for anything that seems complicated or time-consuming… and I don’t have to wear a stupid wig in court.

And the best part is, during Covid lockdown, I demonstrated I can do 100% of my job from home, so I was allowed to move 150 miles away, and I now only have to visit my office two days a month! 🙌🏻

Downside: the arduous and random nature of the job means I’m never up to date and always very tired.

If you could go back to school, would you?

My original plan after getting my undergrad degree was to do a Masters and PhD and become an academic, but I put all that on hold for my (now ex) husband so he could finish his PhD and first postdoc. I’m very glad I never went back, though, because I realise that academia is not the place for me… see above comment about not being able to stand up and talk in court to understand why standing up and talking in a lecture hall would be equally nerve-wracking for me. So, no, I’m content with my current level of schooling.

Honestly, university was more about learning how to ‘adult’ properly than obtaining any useful knowledge on the course anyway (she says, routinely using concepts learnt on her fiction writing modules when crafting Mando fics).

Can you parallel park?

Yup. Narrow roads and a lack of parking spaces in the UK kind of make it a non-optional skill here.

That said, I do sometimes see people desperately trying to line themselves up to get into a space and making an absolute farce out of it, so I guess maybe some people here think it’s optional, but I’d rather not have that kind of stress, so I practised until I could do it easily.

[original GIF found here and then cropped]

Do you think aliens are real?

The way this is phrased… do I think they’re real? Like, do I think the grey ones with big black eyes are anally probing residents in certain sections of North America on a regular basis? Hmm, no. Too many episodes of The X-Files. I mean, Fox Mulder: yum, but I really Don’t Want To Believe, thanks.

But, I remain open to the idea that alien life has evolved elsewhere in the known universe. It’s inconceivably huge, after all. There’s nowhere near enough data to prove (or even speculate) either way – just look at the Drake equation, which has been used to both ‘prove’ and ‘disprove’ the possibility – so I’ll reserve any kind of judgment until some real evidence appears.

Can you drive a manual car?

Yeah, of course. It’s the standard driving test in the UK and allows you to drive both automatic and manual – you actually have to specifically ask to learn only automatic if you decide you can’t handle gears. And, like, it’s all muscle memory, so it’s really not as hard as people think once you’re used to it. I tried to drive an automatic a few years back and found myself involuntarily shadow-shifting the gears!

[original GIF found here and then trimmed for length]

What’s your guilty pleasure?

Mostly, I don’t feel guilty about indulging in pleasures these days. I used to be really affected by social pressures (back before I discovered my autism and still felt like I had to ‘mask’ and fit in), so I used to feel guilty talking about my hyperfixations, but now I couldn’t care less. I shall consume them endlessly and unselfconsciously. It’s very liberating.

Any phobias?

I suppose the answer is sharks, which has no sensible basis for being a phobia because I’ve never had any real encounters to make me fearful (thank fuck!). In fact, I walked through the shark tunnel at SeaWorld just fine as a 7-year-old. Unless that planted some kind of seed of terror, I don’t know. Not sure when it really took hold, but I can’t even look at photos these days. It’s their damn teeth. Someone’s going to have to give me a tooth report on Gladiator II before I can go see it.

The hell if I’m gonna put a photo (or God forbid a GIF) of a shark here, so, umm…

Favourite childhood sport?

Two answers: (1) Football (AKA soccer). I played for a girl’s team when I was about 11, but it was only because the boy I liked was into football. I couldn’t give a shit about it these days, and I don’t think I ever really liked it – I was just ‘masking’, as I did for most of my childhood, but I convinced myself I loved it.

(2) Karate, which I decided all by myself that I fancied doing, then found I was actually quite good at it and excelled at it for a while. But I was 9, and they decided I was so good that I should go and join the adult class (age 14 and up), which I hated, so I quit.

[GIF is one I already had saved from Reddit a while ago, but I can't find the source anymore, so sorry for not crediting the maker]

Do you talk to yourself?

Sometimes, but not often. I live alone, so I occasionally just need to exercise my vocal cords lol. It also depends on what mood I’m in. On an average day, no, I don’t really feel the need to fill the silence, but if I’m excited/animated/annoyed in some way, I might say stuff aloud. Basically, if I’m inclined to utter curse words for any reason, I’ll probably use other words aloud too.

[GIF found here]

Tattoos?

I only have one right now, but I plan to increase that number someday. See photo below; I used to have chameleons as pets and got this tattooed near my right hip when I turned thirty to commemorate them. It’s really small.

I would like to get a phrase in Mando’a inked on me somewhere, probably “Kaysh meg miit’gaana, oyacyi”, which means “she* who writes, remains” [*substitute chosen pronoun – Mando’a doesn’t distinguish genders], and is a Mandalorian proverb teaching that you can live forever if you leave behind written words. I have it engraved on my iPad.

Favourite colour?

Very much the blue (with a hint of green) end of the colour spectrum. For something soft, duck egg blue, or for something bold, teal. See the colour of the titles in this post.

I also like the colours of hyperspace and would happily snuggle up with Din in the cockpit.

Do you like puzzles?

Yeah, I guess. I don’t dislike them. But I don’t really do them much. In terms of the crossword/sodoku/brain teaser sort, I might choose to do them in specific settings, like on vacation when I inevitably need to offer my brain something different than whatever book I’m binge-reading.

In terms of the jigsaw type, I have short phases of thinking, “Ooh, that’ll be fun!”, trying to do one, getting bored, and then forcing myself to finish. Last time that happened was Covid lockdown. Took me a year! Though, to be fair, it was one of these bastards…

Okay, I’m done. I realise I’m very late to the party, and a lot of people have already done this one, so sorry if you’ve already participated. No pressure (and no need to illustrate with gifs and images, I just can’t help myself)… 🩵

@604to647 @beefrobeefcal @d4rm4nd4 @feral-ferrule @gracieheartspedro

@joelslegalwhre @littlemisspascal @magpiepills @penvisions @quicksilvermad

@secretelephanttattoo @studioghibelli @syd-djarin @the-mandawhor1an @zaddymandalorian

[marvelsdc22]

Home For The Summer

Intro: Hey guys! Its been a hot minute since I've posted an actual story on here, I've been having severe writers block and have been going through a lot recently, but I managed to make some time and write something, I hope y'all enjoy! And thank you to @wokeupinawalnut for the assistance in creating this :) love you <3

Summary: Melissa is your mom's best friend, she's become someone you looked up to and could come to for anything, what happens when feelings start to change and your mother turns ruthless?

Warnings: Potential trigger for alcoholism, verbally abusive behavior, reader is 23/24 by the end(let me know if I missed any)

Word Count: 3k

You had known Melissa since you were thirteen, your mother had brought her over after a long day at the school, the two of them having become friends earlier that year when you and your mother had moved here after your mother divorced your dad, who was no longer in the picture, getting the second grade teaching position at Abbott. Melissa had then become someone you looked up to and could confide in when your mother wasn’t around to listen, which happened more and more the older you got.

When you turned seventeen, you started seeing Melissa in a different light, you started to feel things for the other woman that you knew wasn’t right to feel when it came to your mother’s best friend, but you couldn’t help yourself, you found your gaze on her everytime she was around, quickly averting your gaze when you saw her turn your way, you figured this was just one of those stupid crushes, hell you hadn’t even been on a date yourself, no one interested you enough to get that far.

You had hoped that going away for college would change your feelings for the fiery redhead, getting a decent scholarship to Stanford for their medical school, ever since you were given the opportunity to volunteer at the local hospital, you had your heart set on becoming a doctor so when the opportunity appeared, you took it with no hesitation and immediately accepted the offer you had received.

The day you left, your mother was supposed to drop you off at the airport and see you off, but instead you had to call Melissa last minute when your mother told you she was unable to, grateful that she agreed with no hesitation, loading your bags into the bed of her truck before climbing into the passengers seat, you a bundle of nerves and not just from flying away for school.

The ride was silent aside from the quiet music playing through the trucks speakers “You doing alright over there, kid?” Melissa asked, lightly nudging you with her elbow and causing you to jump slightly, having been lost in your thoughts and looking at her after a moment, furrowing your brows before sighing “Nervous and a little upset that my mom isn’t willing to take the time to see her only child off” you admitted, wringing your hands out in your lap, freezing when she rested a hand on one of yours “It’s her loss, you’re gonna do amazing, I know it might not mean much coming from me, but I’m very proud of the person you’ve become and who you’re going to be, kid” she said, squeezing your hand and you felt tears building in your eyes as your stomach flipped and your heart pounded, the praise making you feel lighter “Thank you”.

When you got to the airport, you expected Melissa to just drop you off at your terminal but she took the turn for the parking garage instead, her taking you the whole way through until she couldn’t follow you anymore “C’mere” she said, pulling you into a tight hug and rubbing your back as you buried your face in her neck “Let me know when you land, I’m gonna miss you so much” she said, giving you one last squeeze before pulling away “I will, I’ll miss you more… Thank you” you smiled, squeezing her hands which you were still holding before turning and heading through security, heading for the next phase of your life.

xxxxx

Little did you know that Covid would hit and hinder any and all travel plans you had, keeping you trapped in California to the point you just never visited, not like your mother cared, you were lucky to get a message from her a day, let alone a phone call, you finally found time during your fifth year, you finally had a small break in classes that you were able to come home for the summer, you still kept in touch with everyone, especially Melissa whose been with you through it all, the nights you were stressed out from all the studying? She was a phone call or facetime away, when you were excited about something that just happened? She was there, as the years went by though, you felt something change between the two of you, she seemed to be more flirty when it came to talking to you, but maybe you were overthinking it all and your brain was twisting what was really happening.

I just landed - You

Just found a parking spot, I’ll see you shortly ;) - Mel

You stumbled slightly when you saw the emoji she chose to use, why would she use that one? Was she trying to hint at something? Here you go again, overthinking, she didn’t mean anything by it, you heading for the baggage claim and waiting for your bag to come on the conveyor, fixing your mask as you scrolled through your phone, you didn’t trust planes when it came to this virus, so you’d rather be safe than sorry, you glanced up when you caught a glimpse of what seemed to be your bag, barely able to set it on the ground before you felt arms wrap around you, causing you to tense before you saw the red hair and smelled her usual perfume, turning in her grasp to return the hug just as tightly.

“I can’t believe you’re home” Melissa said softly, pulling back and cupping your face as to get a better look at you, your heart stuttering before you rested your hand on one of hers, lightly leaning into her touch and missing the flash of adoration in her gaze as you closed your eyes “I’ve missed you” you said softly, looking at her once more before you took a step back and grabbed your suitcase, her still holding your hand as she led you through the airport “I missed you more, your mother has been getting on my nerves without you there for buffer” she laughed, glancing back at you and smiling when you let out a giggle “Not surprising, she doesn’t have me to annoy”.

The drive to your mothers house was quiet, the familiarity of the ride calming as she drove you guys through the busy city “You hungry? That sandwich shop is on the way” Melissa said, breaking the silence as she glanced over at you, catching the smile that appeared on your face at the suggestion “When do I ever say no to that place?” You laughed, throwing her a grin before you relaxed back in the passengers seat, feeling more at home than you have in a while.

When you finally got into your mothers house, it felt different, everything was moved around, it didn’t look like the house you had finished growing up in “About a year after you left, she did a whole renovation of the place” Melissa told you as she followed behind you with your suitcase that she insisted on bringing inside, watching as you took in the new layout, a little lost but it was your mothers house and she could do what she wanted with it.

Heading back to your room, you stopped in front of the closed door; would it be changed too? Your mother wouldn’t do that… right? You so lost in your mind you didn’t notice Melissa looking at you worriedly, opening her mouth to say something when you pushed the door open, the two of you freezing when it was a basic room, not at all how you left it “I didn’t know she did this” Melissa admitted, knowing that she would’ve warned you if she had known, anger evident in her tone and looking at you when you released a shaky breath, setting your suitcase down and tugging your arm so you’d face her “Oh hun, c’mere” seeing the tears building and pulling you into her without another word.

Later that night, you were waiting for your mom to come back, having asked Melissa to give you some time to yourself after she helped you calm down, needing time to figure out what you were going to say to your mom about changing your room without notifying you first, startling when you heard the front door open, your mom staring at you in slight shock, she must’ve forgot or wasn’t paying attention when you had told her that you were coming home for the summer “What are you doing here?” She asked, irritation evident in her tone, it feeling like a knife was dug into your chest at the harsh question “I only told you three times that I was coming home for the summer” you said, watching as she set her things down and kicked her shoes off, basically brushing you off as she headed for the kitchen.

Getting up and following her into the kitchen, you watched as she dug around in the fridge, completely disregarding the food that was on the stove that you had made and was keeping warm until she got home “There’s food on the stove-” getting cut off when she slammed the fridge door closed “What do you really want, Y/N?” She asked, crossing her arms and watching as you started wringing your hands out, a habit you had developed over the years when you got nervous or stressed out, both happening right at that moment.

“I saw you changed things… it looks nice” you started, gesturing to the living room behind you which was decked out in new furniture “Why didn’t you tell me that you were changing my room too?” You asked, feeling yourself start to shrink back under her sharp gaze that seemed to analyze everything about you “I don’t need your approval to change things in my house” she stated, raising a brow when you let out a frustrated sigh “I know you don’t, but that was my space, it would’ve been nice to know-” “You don’t live here anymore, you are no longer my responsibility nor do I want or need you, so do us both a favor and get back on that plane and leave me alone!” She shouted, pushing past you and heading upstairs, you noticing this time just how much she reeked of alcohol, a door slamming jarring you out of your shock.

With tears in your eyes, you ran out of the house, ignoring the fact it was raining as your legs carried you to a familiar destination, ending up at Melissa’s front door, tears running down our cheeks and soaked to the bone, the minutes between knocking and her finally opening the door feeling like an eternity, feeling a rush of relief when she finally opened the door in a comfy looking shirt and sweatpants, her hair a little everywhere indicating she had been asleep and a bat in hand, making you idly wonder what time it really was “Mel…” you choked out, more tears slipping out.

“Y/N? What the hell? Get in here-” setting the bat to the side before pulling you into the house and shutting the door behind you “-you’re soaked, let me grab you a towel” she said, turning and rushing down the hallway, returning quickly and wrapping the towel around you before pulling you into her arms “Shhhh… tell me what happened, hun” she whispered, holding you tighter when you let out a choked sob into her chest, letting you take the time you needed to explain what all went down, her heart breaking at the fact your own mother treated you the way she had.

After you explained everything to Melissa, she led you to her room so she could give you some fresh, warm clothes to change into “I’m sorry I woke you up” you apologized, watching as she pulled one of her eagles shirts out and a pair of sweats, her setting them on the bed before going over to you and cupping your cheeks, wiping a stray tear away with her thumb “Don’t apologize, I would rather you wake me than go wandering around in this weather… go change, I’ll be in the living room” she said, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead before leaving the room, closing the door behind her to give you privacy.

When you came back into the living room, you felt your face start to burn when you caught her smiling at the fact you were in her clothes, watching as she set her phone down and patted the spot next to her, tugging you closer when you sat on the other end rather than next to her “You are free to stay with me as long as you need, do you need anything before I head back to sleep?” She asked, wanting to make sure you were taken care of before returning to her room, smiling and patting your leg when you assured her you were okay, pressing a kiss to your head before she headed back to her room.

About an hour later, you got up to head to the spare room for the night when you saw something light up on the coffee table, looking over and seeing Melissa’s phone still sitting there, catching a glimpse of a message from your mother on it.

If you care so much about them then you keep them… - Y/M/N

That small bit that you could see without unlocking the phone was enough to twist the knife that was already buried in your chest, taking a deep breath to steady yourself before returning Melissa’s phone to her room, moving carefully as to not wake her, plugging her phone into the charger and setting it on the nightstand before turning to sneak out, making it to the end of her bed when your pinky toe caught the end of the bed “Shit!” You muttered, collapsing to the floor and holding your foot in pain.

Melissa jumped up when she heard the thud and quickly turned the lamp on before she turned and saw you on the floor “Are you okay, sweetheart?” She asked, helping you up and having you sit on the edge of her bed “Yeah, I was heading to bed and noticed your phone was still on the coffee table so I wanted to put it where it belonged and my toe caught your bed” you admitted sheepishly, watching as Melissa fought hard to not laugh but a small chuckle slipped out “Well, thank you for returning it-” picking her phone up and seeing the message “-what did you see?”

Dropping your gaze to the floor, you messed with the strings on the sweatpants “Enough” you shrugged, taking a shaky breath “She’s not wrong, I’m not important and I don’t deserve anything-” trailing off when her hand firmly gripped your chin and turned your head to face her “Stop that, you deserve everything and your mother is stupid for not realizing that” she said, lightly running her thumb along your bottom lip “Anyone who gets the chance to love you will be the luckiest person alive” she said, her eyes drifting to your lips before meeting your gaze once again “Mel…” You whispered, feeling an imaginary pull between the two of you.

“Can I kiss you?” You asked, locking eyes with her for a moment before realizing what you had just said “I’m sorry, I don’t-” you stuttered before her lips cut you off, stealing the remaining words you had before you melted into the kiss, the two of you pulling back when breathing became necessary, resting your foreheads against one another “I’ve wanted to do that since that night you went to that party and sent me that selfie” Melissa admitted, that having been the night you went to a party last summer, it having been a small one with some classmates, you having sent her a selfie to make sure you looked good, you had wondered why it had taken her so long to respond.

You smiled as you looked at her “Really? I’ve had a crush on you since I was seventeen, I thought it would go away when I left for school… Obviously not” you admitted, reaching over and tucking some loose red strands behind her ear, smiling into the small peck she gave you “We should get to bed… we can talk about this more over dinner?” Melissa suggested, tugging you a little closer by your hips “Dinner sounds wonderful… I’ll see you in the morning?” You asked as you stood, stopping when she grabbed your hand “Or you could sleep in here? If you’re comfortable with that of course” smiling when you nodded and let her tug you onto the bed next to her.

The next morning, you woke up to the spot beside you cold but the smell of breakfast being made and the sound of soft jazz playing from the kitchen, groaning, you forced yourself up and out of Melissa’s bed, making your way to the kitchen and smiling when you saw Melissa standing at the stove, humming along to the music, already dressed for work, this being the last week of school before summer break “Smells good” you smiled, heading over to her and cautiously wrapping your arms around her from behind, unsure what you could and couldn’t do with her, smiling and resting your chin on her shoulder when you felt her lean back against you, the tension releasing from your body.

“I figured you deserved something homecooked” Melissa smiled, pressing a kiss to the side of your head, enjoying this downtime with you “So, I have to work, but when I get back we can go get your stuff from your moms, get you settled here then dinner at this new restaurant that just opened up” she suggested, looking at you when you extracted yourself from her and stole a piece of bacon off the plate, to which she smacked your hand away with a laugh “That works for me, I’ll be here” you said, munching on the bacon.

After Melissa left(after many many kisses), you busied yourself with doing dishes(which was a pain to convince her to let you do) and cleaning up until Melissa got back, taking you to your mothers house who was thankfully nowhere in sight(Melissa had ripped her a new one when she saw her at school) before heading back to Melissa’s, the two of you splitting off to get ready, you wearing your nicest top you had in your suitcase and the nicest pair of pants you had, sadly you didn’t think to pack nice shoes so you were stuck in your vans, checking yourself in the bathroom mirror one last time before heading into the living room to wait for Melissa.

When she entered the room, your jaw dropped, her red curls were down and hanging over her shoulders, her black dress showing off her curves just right and her heels completing the look “Close your mouth, you’ll catch flies” she teased, pushing your chin to close your mouth “Are you sure we need to go out for dinner? I got a whole meal right here” you said, shocking yourself as she smirked “C’mon, I promised my baby dinner, you can have dessert later” she winked before leading you out, the promise being fulfilled as soon as you guys got home, you knew this summer and the next several were going to be the best summers of your life.

[palms-upturned]

PSA

Hello friends, I’m sorry for being mostly offline for a little while, I’ve been struggling a bit. Please rest assured that I’m going to try to get everything running again ASAP, but here’s a short version of what’s going on.

At the moment, I’m unemployed due to my disability and trying to get a lot of things sorted out in the bursts of time when I feel well enough. I am fairly certain that my pain and fatigue is being caused by sciatic endometriosis that was made worse by a covid infection, but it’s going to take me a while to get diagnosed and (hopefully) treated. In the meantime, my pain flareups are unfortunately getting worse and more frequent. What this means is that unfortunately I have stretches of time where I have a hard time talking to people or even thinking straight. Some of the medicines I take for my pain also make me drowsy which makes things even harder on top of it all.

I’m going to continue promoting fundraisers, but I feel very bad that these periods of time are becoming longer and more frequent because every day of fundraising is critically important. So what I’d like to ask is whether any of my friends/mutuals here would be interested in helping me run @vetted-gaza-funds so that even when I’m not well, at least that blog can stay up to date. There are currently over 100 fundraisers posted there, and as more get added, the more time it takes me to update the master list, update urls for users who were forced to remake their blogs, and work through the inbox for new campaigns. Trying to push through on days when I don’t feel well has already resulted in some really stupid mistakes like accidentally deleting the original master list post, and I really don’t want to do something like that again.

One friend of mine has already volunteered to help, which I’m very thankful for, but if I could find maybe five more people, then that would mean one mod for every day of the week, which would hopefully mean that it wouldn’t be too large a commitment for anyone. The more the merrier, basically.

So to break things down, here’s what I would be doing:

Creating a discord server for the blog mods

Looking through the inbox each day for new campaigns to add

Cross referencing those campaigns on master lists/spreadsheets to see which ones are already verified and can be shared

Adding the campaign links, usernames, and other relevant information to a cryptpad document for people to plug into a post/add to the master list

Here’s what I would need help doing:

Making the actual posts on the blog (there is a template in the drafts that I use to make them)

Updating the fund amounts/progress in the master list, ideally every day

If comfortable, briefly answering direct messages to let people know when their campaigns have been added to the blog

Also, so far the blog has just been full of fundraisers for people who have contacted me directly, but if anyone helping with the blog has verified fundraisers that they themselves would like to add, of course that would be great as well!

If you’re interested in helping me out, please dm me or reply to this post! (I’d prefer not to talk via asks because when I answer asks privately I don’t have any record of our conversation and I can be forgetful 😅)

Thank you all 🙏 today I’m unfortunately still not feeling well so I may be slow to respond but I will try to answer messages and get everything set up asap!

[suchathrilltobeagirl]

Hi Katie, first of all, you look stunning, love your pictures.

I read that you are still waiting for your SRS. I’m curious how you are coping with it. I imagine you want it as soon as possible but do you also have some fears or doubts the longer you need to wait? I hope i’m not offending you, im just curious, never had the chance to ask this question.

Ps. Please leave your hair like tjis, dont cut it :))

Aw, thank you, baby, you are so kind! I have waited so long, but it'll happen ... either here in the UK or Thailand, once I have saved enough money!

My only fear is going 'under the knife', which is something that we all fear. But I do so knowing that when I wake up, I will finally BE who I have wanted to be since I was six years old, when I started wearing my sister's clothes in secret.

I suspect the 'system' in place now is hoping I will get bored waiting for such life-changing surgery. They underestimate my desire, my need to be as fully female as I can be. My only frustration is being born 25 years too soon. Today, young people like me are transitioning before the onset of puberty!

That I have to wait longer, given the priority young people get, is totally unfair, it is an unfair system. I am a taxpayer!! That said, I am getting older and the opportunities for me as a woman diminish with age. As much as I want to, I won't be able to continue to wear short skirts, or low cut dresses, without looking out of place, so my 'window' for fulfilment as a woman is closing with each passing year. Had Covid not happened, I would be fully female today. That is my biggest frustration, although I know and fully appreciate how lucky I was to survive.

I am rambling now! Hope I have answered your question! Katie xx

[cal-daisies-and-briars]

And finally we’ve got the retolds with a twist! The ones where you’re utilizing your epic talent to revisit all the biggest Buddie moments from a slightly different angle that breathes new life into them! It’s so fun!!!

📖📖📖📖📖📖📖📖📖📖📖📖📖📖📖📖 (they’re friends! Buck’s bi! They’re gonna fall in love! How do I always forget about them dealing with covid before it comes back up in these stories?! Lol you’d think that one would be a bit harder to forget considering i actually went through it too but 🤷🏻‍♀️)

🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨 (I’d apologize for how many emojis that is except YOU JUST SHOT EDDIE! WHILE HE AND BUCK ARE ENGAGED! Like was that really necessary? (yes it was i love the angst) Can’t wait to see how this plays out especially with them already having the will and “you’re not expendable” conversations! Perhaps they’ll be replaced with an elopement conversation….)

🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼 (i really love your shannon characterization! She’s such a real person and i love her! Also i just realized we’re approaching tsunami territory!!!! I have no idea how that’s gonna go down here but I can’t wait to find out!)

I hope you have fun answering all these and HAPPY PREMIERE WEEK!!! 22 million killer bees incoming!!!

- PCA <3

AWW thank you! You're literally always so kind and I want you to know it genuinely does mean a lot and is very validating.

48 for 📖 (omg I know covid is always SO ANNOYING to write around? I gotta do an au where it doesn't exist sometime):

---

His eyes begin to sting. Fuck. Fuck. He’s crying. 

“I’m just really glad you’re okay,” he blubbers. “I don’t know what I would’ve…”

He shuts his mouth. Stops himself. He barely manages to hold it all back. But he can’t finish his sentence. It feels far too much like a confession. 

I don’t know what I would have done if you died, because I love you, and I need you to always be okay. 

Eddie’s eyes widen a little. Even in their tired, droopy state, the realization in them is clear. He sees it. Fuck. Buck is screwed. 

“Uh,” Buck leans back in his chair, putting space between himself and Eddie. “Sorry. I’m sorry.” 

“Don’t be,” Eddie rasps. “Buck…”

Buck stands. “Uh… I’m going to call Carla. Make sure our plans for tomorrow are still… Yeah.”

“Buck, wait a sec,” Eddie tries.

But Buck is already leaving. His hands are shaking. He doesn’t think he wants to be alone in the room with Eddie again. 

xx.

Buck makes sure Carla is with Chris when Ana brings Eddie home from the hospital. He leaves beforehand. Goes right to Maddie’s. He can’t be around Eddie right now. He doesn’t trust himself not to completely spill over. He feels badly about it, but it’s better this way. And he can’t burden Eddie with any of this right now. Not with the recovery ahead of him.

“Oh, Evan,” Maddie says when he tells her everything. “It’s okay that you got emotional. You care about him. He knows that. It doesn’t mean he knows how you feel outside of that.”

“I don’t think I can pretend anymore, Maddie,” Buck sniffs. “He almost died. He almost died and his girlfriend thanked me for stopping by. You were right. I need space.”

---

96 for 🚨( Lol two snippets of shooting angst in a row I'm so sorry):

---

Basically, Buck does his best to keep things together in this looping, daily hell. He must be doing an okay job of it, he thinks. No one says he’s falling apart, even if he feels like he is. 

iv.

Eddie’s first thought when he can think again, is that death feels heavy and sluggish. Sore. Not at all what’s promised. It takes him longer, and the slowly regained ability to hear the beeping of hospital machinery, to realize that he isn’t dead at all.

He survived.

Somehow, he survived. 

Well, not somehow. He doesn’t remember a lot, but he remembers one thing. Buck. It’s not by chance that he survived being shot down in the street. It was Buck. Buck saved him. Which makes Eddie realize. Oh god. Buck had to save him. After everything that’s happened to him…

Eddie tries to open his eyes. It’s not easy. Each eyelid feels weighed down and the lights are blinding. He makes a hoarse, uncomfortable noise in the back of his throat. The most he can manage at the moment.

When his vision clears - at least as much as his dry, stinging eyes will allow - he tilts his head a little to the side. The motion sends a ripple of pain across his right arm, concentrated most acutely in his shoulder. He ignores it, trying to get his bearings. 

Beside the bed Eddie is stuck in, is Buck. He’s slumped back in a stiff plastic hospital chair, fast asleep. His neck is craned at an awkward angle, head leaning against his shoulder. There’s a thin blanket over his torso, like someone gently placed it there, afraid to disturb him. A nurse, maybe? 

Buck’s forearm, opposite to the shoulder he’s leaning on, is outstretched onto Eddie’s bed. His hand rests inches away from Eddie’s. Like maybe he was holding it when he drifted off. With his uninjured arm,, Eddie stretches his wrist and fingers to brush against Buck’s hand. It hurts. It’s laborious. But he manages contact. 

Buck jolts a little, eyes flying open like he’s been shocked. Eddie watches, eyelids drooping a little, as the realization smacks Buck, full-force. 

“E-Eddie?” Buck stammers. 

“Hi,” Eddie manages to rasp. 

“Oh my god,” Buck cries, squeezing Eddie’s hand so much it hurts. “Oh god, Eddie. You’re awake.”

“Hardly,” Eddie mumbles.

Buck doubles forward, crying and pressing his lips to Eddie’s hand. 

“You’re awake. You’re really awake.”

“Didn’t die,” Eddie says. 

“No,” Buck runs a hand through his hair. Kisses his forehead. “You didn’t die. You’re alive. You’re going to be just fine.”

“M’okay?”

“You’re okay,” Buck promises. “You held on. You fought like hell.”

Eddie tries to smile. He’s not sure if he manages it.

“Couldn’t stand you up… For the wedding…”

Buck laughs a little wetly. “I love you so much. Fuck.”

“Saved me,” Eddie mutters, eyes fluttering shut. 

“I sure tried,” Buck whispers. 

Eddie means to tell Buck how much he loves him, too. How thankful he is. But his jaw feels too heavy. The effort feels like too much. 

“You go back to sleep,” Buck says softly. “I’ll be here when you wake up again.”

So Eddie lets himself be carried back under, knowing that he’s safe. Buck has him. He always has. 

🔹🔹🔹

When he wakes up again, it isn’t Buck he sees, but his father. Which throws him for a loop. For a moment, he’s sure he’s dreaming. 

“Dad?” He asks groggily.

“Hey-hey! Son! You’re awake!” Ramon exclaims happily. His eyes look a little wet.

“DAD?” He hears the sweetest voice in the world from the other side of the room. 

“Chris?” Eddie asks. He shifts to sit up, but winces in pain.

“One second,” Ramon says, reaching for the hospital bed’s controls. “Let me fix this.”

---

30 for 🔼 (THANK YOU! I'm trying to do her justice. And yesssss tsunami on the horizon):

---

Her hair is half brushed, her shirt might be on inside out, and she is nowhere near ready to leave. She’s going to make them late, for sure. 

“Hi,” she exhales when she throws the door open. “Sorry. Running behind.”

“Hey, no worries,” Buck says, shrugging. 

“How’s um…” Shannon blanks. God, her brain is all over the place today. “Your health?” 

Buck snorts. “The blood thinners? Terrible. Otherwise, I’m fine. That’s what’s frustrating.”

She frowns sympathetically. “Sorry, Buck. That really sucks.”

“Yeah,” he shrugs again. But this one feels more forced than the first. “Hey, where’s Chris?”

“Brushing his teeth,” Shannon says. And yeah, she’s aware of the time. “Like I said, we are running behind.” 

“Seriously, it’s fine,” Buck insists. “I’m just the chauffeur.”

Shannon smiles gratefully. “Thank you. Give me ten minutes?”

He nods. “Sounds good.”

[twopoppies]

Hello darling Gina. Re the Harry anon, I admit I did/do feel like he ‘sold out’ a bit when he went solo. I felt like, we’ve followed you since XF, we voted for you and loved and followed the band etc etc and now you’re in the states and didn’t even come to the UK on first tour, and next tour he did several stops in many states and then like three stops in the whole of the UK (I might be wrong on these dates, going by what I remember).

H doesn’t owe me anything but I did feel let down. Lou on the other hand seemed more in touch with the UK fan base. I’m back here after years away so things might have changed, I just wanted to air my thoughts. Again, none of them owe me anything and I realise that but I can’t help how I feel x

Hi, love. Welcome back.

So… You can’t help how you feel, but I would suggest removing your personal hurt feelings from the matter. You say he doesn’t owe you anything, but obviously you feel he does. Which is fine. But acknowledging that makes a difference.

If you’re able to remove your idea of what you think he “should have” done, some of the issues and expenses that go into mounting a world wide tour might be a little more apparent.

Harry’s first album was given a ton of money for promo. But the first leg of the tour was very small and I’d bet it was focused on the US in part because breaking through here goes a longer way toward establishing an artist for long term success. It’s also possible they wanted to work out some of the kinks before they took the show overseas and to bigger venues. It also was only 13 shows before the second leg began and he went through Europe with the UK being the third through sixth shows on that leg. So I don’t really get what you’re saying where Live On Tour is concerned.

As for the second tour, we were at the tail end of the pandemic. He started in the US most likely because it was a hell of a lot simpler to travel through the contiguous United States in terms of permits and legalities related to performing during a pandemic than it would have been trying to do the same traveling through numerous cities in numerous countries.

Taking it as a personal affront or a sign that he doesn’t care about the support from UK fans over the years just seems nonsensical to me. I get the disappointment that you didn’t get that part of the tour. Absolutely. But the UK isn’t the only place that didn’t get a tour of Fine Line. It’s generally a major stop for every artist. Including him. And the short stint for Fine Line never would have happened if Covid hadn’t thrown everything out of whack. And if Covid hadn’t happened he wouldn’t have released Harry’s House right after that Fine Line mini tour, but it had been years since he’d released new music and I’m sure the label was chomping at the bit to make some more money. I just don’t see a reason to look at the situation and label it as Harry not caring about his UK fans.

As for Louis, I think being “in touch with his UK fan base” is a major part of his brand. I don’t think it’s disingenuous, but it’s obvious to me that he’d lean into it and do more shows in more areas because he had a much longer run of small venues than Harry did.

I also think it’s just pointless to compare. IMO, a British artist having lots of shows in the UK doesn’t necessarily mean he loves and is thankful to the UK fans any more than another artist. And there are always numerous factors involved in where shows are booked.

In reference to this.

More here

[wa-royal-tea]

I'm back! Kinda + What I've been up to + Timezone Change, Story Posting Update

Heyyyy thur guys! I’m back, kinda. Sorry it took me a while to update you guys on what I’ve been working on, life has been extra busy since July 31st for me 💀 I won't post a story update yet as I still have things to do but I mightttt return by the end of September.

If you wanna know what I've been up to, read under the cut. Just a warning, it's pretty long 💀

I have an update on what I've been working on irl and it's kind of an exciting news, at least for me lol. So, in case anyone is wondering what I've been up to, I'm actually preparing to further my Masters overseas and this plan has been a wip since last year. I've been studying for my IELTS because the universities I've applied to requires me to take it. And then I had my graduation ceremony for my Bachelor's Degree after waiting for SO long bcs of Covid. It was one of the happiest day in my life bcs I got the Vice Chancellor's award!!! Sorry for the bragging there, I'm just so proud of myself :') I worked my ass off to maintain my CGPA every semester so getting that award really felt like all of that hard work was worth it :')

After all that is done, I applied to the Uni's that I wanted and surprisingly, all the Uni's I applied to gave me an offer which is pretty neat! I accepted one of the offers and then I had to look for a sponsorship.

I kept it a hush-hush kind of thing and only told several of my close friends about what I was planning to do bcs it was something that I wasn't sure that I'll be getting so anytime that I was taking a "break", I was actually working on this in the background (had to attend zoom interviews with the Uni's. Doing the tasks in order to get an interview invite etc.). It was a stressful process but yeah, this is what I've had planned for me when I was younger so I was determined to make it happen no matter what! Your girl is not one to give up easily! 😤

So around June this year, the sponsorship that I've been aiming for opened and I applied for it, got the results that I had been offered a full-ride sponsorship on July 31st and everything became so busy for me because I had to prepare the necessary documents to be sent to the sponsorship board. It was an exhausting process as I had to make sure that everything is prepared perfectly so there wouldn't be any problems and so far, alhamdulillah, everything has been going well. I had my visa done, I secured a place to stay during the duration of my studies, all the documents were sent at the end of last week. But preparing all of these took a toll on my energy and I simply don't have the energy to open my game or even open blender to work on my story. But I have been writing the scripts and all so yeah, the story is still running in the background. I did find some little time to work on poses but I worked on a few before I stopped because I was too tired hahaha.

Anyways, only a few people knew what I was working on while I was on this break. Shoutout to Miss Wheat knee and Gigi for being patient with me replying to their discord messages late everyday 😭 And thank you for giving me your emotional support and encouragement! A huge thank you to both Miss Devilled Eggs and Wheat knee for helping me in my process of applying to the Uni's from helping me brush up my English for my IELTS during one of our previous calls, and for helping me with my Piece to Camera video practice for my Uni interviews. I really, greatly, am thankful to you guys for that. And to Wheat knee, thank you for believing in me when I was overthinking stuff thinking I wouldn't get the offers sfkhskl I really appreciate you for that 😢

And with that, I would like to update you guys that my posting time will be changing as I will be moving to London for my studies. So my timezone will no longer be GMT+8 :') It will be GMT+1 as of September 28th. Aside from that, my postings won't be regular too, I'll be updating whenever I can as I'll probably be busy with my studies and all. So, wish me luck! I'm a bit anxious about this so I hope I'll do well :')

Thank you to all my readers who are still there for me since day 1, you all are the best! And sorry that the story will take a while to be completed, I'll try my best to still work on it bcs I love it too much to just leave it like that 😭

That's all I guess! Thank you again for reading this if you are reading it lol.

Love,

Nina ❤

[waitmyturtles]

With @lurkingshan’s coaching — and plugging my ears of the noise around all the theories and ships and lists and everything — I rewatched the first Only Friends episode tonight to prepare for episode 2 tomorrow. I wanted Shan to get me more acquainted with the increasingly popular theory that Mew isn’t a narcissistic sociopath, which, listen, I’m holding out a little hope for, still.

But besides that, when I watch a Jojo show, I’m always on the sniff for his Big Themes, and this’ll come back to Mew in a second, but first:

I didn’t realize this during my first watch, but one theme I picked up on is the ephemerality of time and life in this show. Cheum says to Mew: we’re gonna die of COVID, airborne particulates, or radiation. We’re outta here. You GOTTA get with Top already. Chop chop. And Mew says: not yet.

On the Ray side, his ephemerality is his short-term memory — so damn short that he can’t remember the night before. On the Boston side — we know the deal.

So Mew might want to play around with that paradigm for a second. He might want something in his life to stick around a little longer, longer than Ray’s memory, longer than one of Boston’s one-night stands. He’s been told by Cheum that he gains status by hooking Top (thank you for reminding me of this, Shan!), but also — he might want to change the paradigm of time not really mattering to the friends around him.

I just finished I Promised You The Moon, and of course — plum wine. The longer plum wine ages, the sweeter and tastier it is. We know there’s gonna be a deal with Sand, Ray, and plum wine, if the trailer isn’t jacking with us on that point. We already know that Mew bucks other paradigms around him (I LOVE him not taking shots while everyone else is during bar trivia). Maybe Mew wants to test the waters around him and slow down the rushed pace at which his friends operate. I soooo want to think there’s a endgame narcissistic read on this, but we’re not there yet. At least he gains a touch of power by slowing Top down at Top’s own game.

The passage of time is what I’m glomming onto to the next episode, and I’m remembering that Mew asks Top in the episode 2 preview: “can you start hitting on me again?” We’re only on the second episode and Mew might already be asking to relive memories. I want to know more about what that means, but in any case: Shan, I’m closer to buying the theory. If there’s disaster, it’s likely going to look a lot different than from what I was originally expecting.

[hayjeon]

🥹

hi everyone, i know it’s been quite a while.

i don’t even remember how to use the app/site well enough to find when the last time i posted a fic was (like, where did the time stamps go?!)

i bet this won’t come as much of a surprise to anyone who’s been following me for a while because i clearly went MIA for a few years. just wanted to pop back in and clarify a few things and let yall know i am alive and well 🫶🏻

WHERE TF R U

i have, unfortunately, moved on from my ff writing era of my life. i’ve seen all your messages of support and reactions to my writing and constantly see the reposts and recs made in my email inbox, and i cherish each and every one of them and do miss yall very often. i am currently now working and traveling full time, and am just past the era in which i used to absolutely love bts/kpop. i’m actually now an avid ao3 dramione reader 😂 and have devoted a lot of my time to getting physically/emotionally healthier, furthering my career, and just pouring love into myself and everyone around me 🤌🏻

DO YOU EVEN LIKE BTS ANYMORE

i still do love/listen to bts, but i’ve also been feeling like i’ve outgrown them a bit and no longer actively read bts fics myself 🥹 but to sometimes come back to my own blog and my homepage to see that other writers are still here and dedicated makes me feel so giddy and happy for them. watching bts grow from their boy in luv era when i first became a fan to the degree they’re at now and even when i stopped actively writing (probably when they started breaking into the US/english lyrics, or covid era) was such a big life landmark for me, and i will always cherish them in my heart for that. i will also always cherish this blog, that kept me actively writing, throughout uni, and actively creating content anonymously, for helping me through some hard times emotionally, physically, and mentally.

WHATS GONNA HAPPEN WITH UR FICS

i don’t think i’ll be updating any of my wips: any writer out there who feels inclined to continue the stories, i give you full permission (pls don’t plagiarize!) and would hope that you drop a quick msg in my inbox when you post so i can read them (better than tags!) 🥰 would also be happy to share where i intended a lot of my fics to go plot-wise. i also deem it would be a disservice to a lot of you for me to release unfinished drafts, but im happy to share that as well to anyone who wants to pick it up, or just are curious where the plots went (lmk if ur into that?)

WHAT ABOUT THIS BLOG

i will be keeping this blog up and active. anyone who wants to pop in and re-read anything: thank you for your continued support. feel free to translate, repost, use as inspiration, continue the stories yourselves, and do whatever you want. i’m sending these fics as a love letter to everyone who’s supported me thus far, and anyone new to the fandom (welcome! i know army has increased so much since i left) into the universe and all i can do is release them with a sense of peace and love, although it’s a bit bittersweet.

CAN WE STILL ASK QUESTIONS

of course 😍 i love seeing them in my inbox so continue to ask away!!!

to conclude:

thank you to everyone here.

thank you to bts and hope for a quick and safe army service to all of them.

and happy new year 🫶🏻

[socketballmasks]

I've been trying to figure out how to word some reflections on the last year, and how things are going. I guess I'll start with talk about production:

I don't like how I've been handling orders until now. Taking orders on a preorder basis and putting them into a backlog works, but I wasn't executing that idea that well. I had set up some calculations based on numbers that turned out to be wrong, and had other unexpected setbacks that have dragged things out a couple months longer than they should have been. I ended up spraining my ankle pretty badly near the end of the year, which put me out of all work for roughly six weeks, and then right as I got out of that, I caught covid (at a grocery store of all places), which put me out for another week. Then, I had to put much of my resin workstation toward producing christmas gifts for family, which took another week out. That could have been avoided, perhaps… but I did want to give my folks something handmade this year.

I have been rethinking my methods – to focus primarily on production so that I can deliver orders more faster and more frequently. New calculations of work time based on more accurate numbers look promising, and I am starting to put them into practice. The focus will be to have items ready before or close to their sale dates, so that all of the different factors that longer time periods introduce can be avoided.

For those of you with backlogged orders, I will be delivering them all within the first three to four months of this year. I’m not going to release another “shipping schedule” chart because I don’t want to find myself breezing past deadlines again, and possibly disappointing people that way. I’m very grateful that you all have been so patient with me. I’m closing in on being able to ship out the first of the five backlogged order batches, and anticipate fully achieving that by the end of this month. Because several customers have orders in multiple batches, and I am doing my best to combine them all, there’s a bit of a cumulative effect. Things are slower at first, as I’m not only handling the first batch, but also certain people’s orders across other batches. This picks away at the further batches that need to ship, so things may get faster as I approach the final backlogged batch. Now that I’m able-bodied and no longer sick with corona, there shouldn’t be any crazy setbacks to the backlog fulfillment process.

I don’t have much else to say here, so thank you for taking a moment of your time to read my thoughts this year. Best wishes to you and yours,

Socketball