#(the first ship here is like. healthy. c//a isn't)

[adorawasright]

some ppl rlly don't know what toxic yuri is

[ghelgheli]

17! but also using the opportunity of the ask game to get to know more about the effortless worldbuilding in sff :)

from the end-of-year book ask

17: Did any books surprise you with how good they were?

I think Three Body Problem is the only one meeting this condition this year so I'll have no trouble staying on topic :> but I'm gonna specifically talk about "hard" SF as I conceive of it—I haven't read any analysis so this may just be a jumble of improvised thoughts.

SF, being "speculative" fiction, of course has to take on the problem of speculating and of presenting things that don't (and perhaps cannot) happen. On average this is accomplished thru a healthy combination of scientific grounding and good-natured handwaving: I drop a few sentences about "quantum entanglement" and you go along with my ansible, or you tell me about "positronic circuits" and I agree that you can make a brain with them. This is the compact that makes SF work because you fundamentally cannot expect speculation without, well, ceding ground on reality.

But at least a subset of SF readers are of the kind to really want to grok how it is that this or that scientific feature of the world works or may come about. Every contraption and novel technology is like a puzzle to be riddled out. This is the place where speculation becomes sincere mechanical prediction, and it's why I love hard SF.

This subset of readers can be matched to a subgenre of writers who commit fully to filling in as many blanks in their technological, biological, etc. speculation as possible. The rows of astronomical data can't be left vague—tell me what frequency of light we're dealing with here—xenobiology isn't taken for granted—what is the neurology of your aliens??—and so on. The dots are connected, the rest of the owl is drawn for real, the image is made crisp. Like fireworks for the reader's brain.

When this kind of worldbuilding is executed well imo it looks effortless. Looks, not is, because behind every explanation of near-c travel is hours of research into at least special relativity and time dilation, along with calculations by-hand. Behind every account of an exoplanet's atmosphere is probably a few papers perused on the subject and several articles on scientific american. Peter Watts, in the note at the end of Blindsight, includes a fucking bibliography of a hundred or so references as well as thank-yous to many an academic he split handles of liquor with. And this is only the visible fragment of what has to be a library of knowledge accumulated both passively and actively to make a speculated world feel as concretely plausible as possible.

None of this is necessary for good SF. The aforementioned compact means any author can opt out of this commitment at any time. But it's what it takes to make tightly-written hard SF, where your conceptual hands are kept diligently at your side, waving an idea through maybe once every five chapters when you have no other choice.

So anyway, Three Body Problem is a tour de force in doing this and doing it cleanly. It uses a storytelling device a lot of hard SF employs to make it work: rather than stuffing dense exposition into narration (at which point, just read the source papers) it deploys a cast of characters who more than anything else, really know their shit. We get exposition trickle-fed through experts who are trying, along with us, to make sense of their novel environments and unfamiliar technologies using their knowledge of the present limits of human understanding. This is what Watts does in Blindsight too, by the way: a claustrophobic ship crewed by technical specialists makes first contact, so everyone has something encyclopedic to say about everything and it's only natural.

What astounded me about Cixin Liu's writing is that he made it work just when I least thought he would be able to. I was sure I was being shown things completely inexplicable and necessarily supernatural until he went and explained them in plain terms; better yet, he explained them in ways that made so much sense in retrospect that I was kicking myself for not seeing the answer. This has exactly the flavour of a good puzzle.

The trade-off hard SF makes is that you are often limited in the metaphorical/thematic work you can do through your speculation. I think the contrast between "calendrical science" in Yoon Ha Lee's Machineries of Empire series and Asimov's "psychohistory" illustrates this well.

Yoon Ha Lee has mathematical training, and calendrical science is a speculative field consisting of theorems, conjectures, proofs, etc. in the language of mathematics that stand in for cultural hegemony and power projection. This makes for a great operationalization of soft power: space is filled and distorted by the quantifiable effects of whatever regime is dominant there (the "calendar" here being synecdoche for culture writ large). But obviously he can't fill in the blanks of how a calendar causes spacetime distortions that specifically make one side's weapons more effective, or provide certain formations with shielding effects. This is, I guess, semi-hard (lol) SF—you can see how it's supposed to work, but it's clear that it just won't. What you get in return is pretty politically interesting storytelling.

Psychohistory is the converse: a deterministic-enough lovechild of economics and sociology explained in the Foundation series as using all the familiar methods of linear algebra and differential equations together with unfamiliar innovations of just how to quantify human behaviour in order to make reliable predictions. There are entire chapters dedicated to explaining the conceptual nuance that went into developing psychohistory ("the hand on thigh principle" from prelude to foundation is just about how the theory resolves divergence by reducing insignificant terms to zero) and an entire book to exploring one of its limitations. It's fascinating to read. But you also get little narrative depth out of it, because hard SF, even when done well, is not guaranteed to make a story thematically interesting or politically compelling. This is the Three Body Problem problem too: its political commitments are threadbare and unserious because that's just not what it's about. I couldn't recommend it on those terms, but that's not what I like so much about it. I will say the conceptualization goes a little off the rails in the final chapters, but I think most SF authors were in some kind of string theory inspired fugue state at the time.

What I would love to see (and I'm sure exists) is hard SF that also has interesting politics. Unfortunately that's an intersection of two already-narrow intersections.

ty for ask✨🐐

[spop-romanticizes-abuse]

i was just thinking about the fact that there are a few toxic sapphic ships i've encountered in fandom spaces and it made me realize why c//a is one of the worse.

it's because one: the source material tries to gaslight everyone into thinking the ship isn't toxic

and two: the fandom always end up more toxic than the ship itself.

my reasons for this is simple. i used to watch a show called legacies with a ship, p*sie who is seen as toxic within canon (like they were not romantized within canon AT ALL.), but the fandom for the ship didn't see it that way, making the shippers super toxic when it was pointed out. and tried to gaslight anyone who believed it was toxic that it wasn't or that it wasn't as toxic as something else within the show! so it can't be that bad! not realizing two things can be toxic at once. and the fact the show acknowledged that they were toxic, made it entertaining to watch. but it was easier to point out all the issues within canon that was never retconned so they couldn't exactly disagree with it, just try to change the subject to make the ship looks better.

whereas since spop's canon says that c//a isn't toxic by season 5, the shippers takes that and runs with it. because it can't be toxic if canon says so!!! (which .... no, actually. it called romanticizing) and it creates a more toxic environment for critical thinking because of the fact the canon gives the shippers something of an out. and gives them this reason to argue and be worse than the ship itself, because canon says so! so anyone who disagress with canon is the toxic one! when we're just going by the first four seasons (and even some of season five) that shows, no, they are actually really toxic even outside of their sister dynamic. and i wished the show embraced it, instead of trying to write it off. because i rather that than this loop of seeing people not having any crictical thinking skills believing that canon is "perfect" and if you disagree, you're obviously wrong since everything that happened before season five no longer matters and context no longer exist, and it's exhauting.

c//a shippers would actually be more tolerable if they just say "yes, this is toxic but i still like it" then trying to justify themselves on how it's Good and Healthy ship.

any way, rant over. thank you for this blog, i hope you have a great day. and if you want me to expand or explain anything i mentioned here, i'm happy to do so!

i agree with everything here, i have nothing more to add <3

[spopsalt]

Bro are you mentally ok? You're over here saying that Rick and Morty's familial relationship is healthier than Catra and Adora's relationship like??? Have you even watched the shows??? I'm convinced that you're braindead or just media illiterate.

Oh wow! Well looky here! Such a lovely anon ask <3 First off, if you don't like my content... maybe just block me instead of asking if I'm mentally okay and calling me braindead??? I'm not saying their dynamic is healthy, far from it, but I'm saying that it's healthier than c//a (Not like that's a high bar) Anywayyyy allow me to explain why it's healthier than your incest cute totally healthy ship. Again, just wanna make it clear because people are gross, whatever I say about Rick and Morty is 100% PLATONIC AND FAMILIAL! Got that out of the way? Good. And awayyyyyyyyy we go!

Rick doesn't use unwanted physical touch on Morty to assert control unlike a certain abusive kitty cat *cough* Catra *cough* Catra literally forces Adora to dance with her in the princess prom dance that for some reason a lot of c//a stans sexualize (Despite them being TEENAGERS at the time) and we can clearly see that Adora is uncomfortable the whole time. Meanwhile with Rick and Morty at most Rick will touch Morty's shoulder, or awkwardly hug him back, but he never does it when it's unwanted, for example when Morty pulled away from their hug, Rick didn't attempt to hug him again, sure he looked concerned but that isn't a bad thing, he was just worried, anyways that ties into my next point!

Rick is actually protective of Morty. Now, Catra is only protective of Adora when the plot demands it! But Rick is consistently protective of Morty, this started all the way back in season 1 episode 4, where he gets rightfully pissed when he found out aliens were monitoring Morty naked to accurately simulate his genitalia, we can even see that he tried to attack them but was held back. And in the episode afterward, we can see him kill someone who attempted to assault Morty.

Rick never attempted to kill Morty. This is the lowest possible bar, BUT Rick has never once attempted to kill Morty, again, unlike a certain kitty cat who tried to kill her sister crush MULTIPLE TIMES! Rick actually does the exact opposite, we see in season 2 episode 1 "A Rickle In Time" that when push comes to shove, Rick is willing to sacrifice his life for Morty. While this doesn't make up for all the bad stuff he does to Morty, it's pretty irrefutable evidence that Rick does care about Morty. I'm not saying you have to sacrifice yourself for someone to show that you care, buttttt it's pretty good evidence to show that Rick does care. His literal only request is for Morty to "be good"

Next up! Morty canonically gets comforted by Rick's physical touch. This shows that Morty feels comfortable enough around Rick to get comforted whenever he so much as hugs him, we see this in "Unmortricken" and "Fear No Mort" (Abilet those were like the only times Rick and Morty hugged soooooo) Meanwhile with Adora, Catra's touch tends to make her panic more (Unless you count her being calmed by Catra's slap when she was having a panic attack but c'mon dude)

Rick never brags about how easy it is to manipulate Morty, while Rick does canonically manipulate Morty in canon, which is immensely fucked up, I am not defending Rick I promise you, he literally does the bare minimum and doesn't brag about how easily manipulated Morty is unlike Catra twice, I don't remember the exact episodes, but the lines are "You and Adora are perfect for each other I'll give you that, earnest, naive, ridiculously easy to manipulate..." "But she's (Adora's) slow, and easily manipulated."

Rick never finds happiness in Morty's pain, again another really, really low bar, buttttt Rick is happy because Morty is miserable, the closest I can think of is season 4 episode 3, but he wasn't happy because Morty was miserable, he was happy because his (fucked up) plan worked, meanwhile Catra is always smiling and make little quips when Adora is in literal agony due to her, she derives some kinda sick sadistic pleasure from it and just loves to feed on her insecurities during battle, which is...interesting.

Those were just some random ones I could think of from the top of my head, but I'm sure that there's more, so maybe you need to watch the shows before leaving anon hate <3

[acephysicskarkat]

Hello, saw some of your anti c//a that mention how you think c//a is a bad enemies-to-lovers ship while griddlehark is a good one, and may i ask how that is? Genuine question, because i don’t like c//a, and i’m neutral on griddlehark (mainly because I don’t know much atm), from what i’ve seen/heard, it seems like it’s a lot more toxic of a dynamic than c//a is initially/pre canon? Again not trying to bait, am gen curious /genuine

This is going to be kind of disjointed, and I apologise, but this is kind of a topic that defies a simple summary.

Bear in mind that ahead be big Locked Tomb spoilers and the SP0P spoilers that basically everyone already knows.

I would say that the two critical differences are 1) the handling of the toxicity within the narrative, and 2) the structure and arrangement of the toxicity.

You are absolutely correct that pre-canon Griddlehark's mutual hatred is a toxic dynamic. They initially detest each other with a passion; one of the main plot points driving the entire series is a young Harrow having Gideon's blood under her nails after a fight.

As Gideon and Harrowhark work together, however - and here is the point where 100% of bad enemies-to-lovers arcs crash and burn - the toxicity goes down. It never becomes totally healthy - indeed, post-GtN Harrow invents an entirely new way to have an unhealthy relationship, involving performing brain surgery on herself at 17 - but the majority of the narrative is spent showing them moving from "would piss on the other's grave given the chance" to a mutually tolerated working relationship, to a growing loyalty, to the pool scene where Harrow shows Gideon more honesty and trust than she's had from anyone in her life. A lot of what makes this work is pacing and structure; every new step works because it's building on the previous ones, none of them feeling jarringly fast or unmotivated.

More than that, a big help is that the toxicity feels intentional. The relationship being Kinda Fucked is a 100% intentional thing that I'm pretty sure I've seen Tamsyn Muir talking about in interviews. It's a narrative element that Muir is monitoring and adjusting with the care of a good zookeeper trying to keep the humidity in the reptile enclosure exactly right.

(I genuinely cannot praise the writing in these books enough.)

Turning to SP0P as a contrast, its relationship has a more understated toxicity, but a much more pervasive one. Young Adora and C*tra weren't clawing at each other's faces whenever left unsupervised, but young C*tra sure did claw at Adora's face for wanting to have more than one friend! It's not the PVP arena of Growing Up Griddlehark, but "you are my friend, therefore your needs are subordinate to mine" is still far from a healthy dynamic, and the narrative never addresses it.

The bigger problem, though, is that the toxicity doesn't so much "go down" as trace out a parabola. The entire first half of the narrative shows the toxicity going up sharply, to the point of C*tra being willing to die just to make Adora miserable, then it hovers there for another quarter, and then it returns to an earlier level of toxicity. S5 C*tra's treatment of Adora stays awful. She spends "Taking Control" throwing a tantrum over how the real problem is Adora and the others being mad at her; she portrays herself as the wounded party in her like four separate murder attempts on Adora in "An Ill Wind" to produce the worst line of the show; she continues throwing tantrums whenever she doesn't get what she wants and making everything about herself right up to the love confession, including that confession ("stay with me, the person who spent four seasons refusing to stay with you!"). It feels bizarre that Adora goes from "even if you're my best friend, I won't let you blame me for shit that isn't my fault" in S4 to doing nothing but looking sad when C*tra portrays her as being in the wrong for not just meekly standing by while C*tra burned down her home and murdered her friends.

And - and I'll acknowledge that a big part of this is probably executive fuckery, I just don't think that really matters - the pacing and structure absolutely are not helping. I could buy S5's sudden reversal if C*tra and Adora had had a fun, weightless enmity where there was an obvious respect between them. They don't. C*tra spends a truly distressing amount of time utterly consumed by the desire to cause Adora as much pain as possible, to the point of attempting a murder-suicide on the entire world. No point in S2-S4 shows a C*tra who Can't Bring Herself to Really Hurt Adora, regardless of the things the stans have convinced themselves they saw; she's so totally driven by spite that she tears her own life to shreds in the hope Adora will be caught up in the edges. The relationship has to do a sudden R*ylo swerve rather than building on what's gone before because "what's gone before" is like three plot points in the first season that have been narratively overwhelmed by C*tra's multiseason campaign of cruelty like a single pea being weighed against the USS Nimitz.

This is where intentionality comes into play. The toxicity in c/a is just there. For all the bullshit about C*tra's story being about what happens when you're the toxic friend, it doesn't feel like an intentional narrative element that is seriously being examined; it feels like a writing fuck-up where C*tra was supposed to feel like way less of a stalker asshole.

Anyway, I hope this has made some vague semblance of sense, but I've been at this for like an hour and I'm tired and I need to go check on a craft project.

[stepswowdsen]

KuroEne AU: Ene gets intimate with Kuroha (Part 2)

KuroEne AU: Ene gets intimate with Kuroha (Part 1)

Not sure if links are gonna work when I'm on priv but here! You can refer back to the first post if you'd like to get the full context and read the rest.

KuroEne AU: Ene gets intimate with Kuroha (Part 2)

Summary: Ene hate fucks Kuroha. The End.

KuroEne AU Rambles

I'm gonna preface this with my rambles first before I post my KuroEne AU dialogue scripts. At the very least I want my rambles and ship ideas to be interesting to read. Hopefully this is interesting <3

I feel like Notion changed their font omg

Also just for those who aren't familiar with my AU ideas. My depictions of my ships (including their bedroom intimacy), are ALWAYS mutually consensual. And I always make sure to make my ship depictions as healthy as possible. At least, as healthy as we can get with Kuroha/Saeru, anyways. Like we ARE dealing with a chara who's basically the equivalent of a serial killer, causing an eternal time loop tragedy by constantly killing the protag cast.

Ene hate fucks Kuroha, acting on her complicated feelings and desire for him, and Kuroha loves teasing her. In Kuroha/Saeru's words, they indulge in pleasure together.

In canon verse, their relationship is so messy and complicated and angst heavy and tinged with tragedy, and that's what makes it fun~~

Though ofc I also enjoy dealing with them in more lighthearted AUs too.

Ene tries to convince herself that she's just doing this to defeat him, but Kuroha tells her the real reason - she seeks warmth and companionship, and because of his knowledge of the previous routes (past timelines) and experiences, he knows her and her desires intimately.

It's a requirement for me for the MLW ships I'm obsessed with to have at least one meow meow mf (and if not that, a chara of a secondary trope I enjoy), to be messy and complicated and funny, and for at least one of the characters to be able to be HC'ed/interpreted as queer)

Like it's obvious that KuroEne works so well as a ship due to their unique context and dynamic (Kuroha/Saeru's character context and HaruTaka and KonoEne's existence), and KagePro's setting.

Like I would NOT be into it if it was just some generic ass Hate/Love trope MLW ship (a trope I despise most of the time unless it's good), cuz most Hate/Love MLW ships are bad and uninteresting.

Random unsorted dialogue script drafts I wrote. Gonna have to add to these sometime but for now they're unfinished. I like Kuroha teasing blushy embarrassed Ene~

Since both submissive Ene and more assertive dominant Ene appeals to my gay side teehee 🤭 I had lots of different separate scenario ideas in mind, so I tried to include the context in which I wrote these

KuroEne Rambles (Continued)

Me: Why is an AU where Ene has hate sex with Kuroha/Saeru so interesting and fun to write for

I mean, I know why. It's because Ene can actually interact with him and others (Mekakushi Dan members) physically now that she isn't just stuck in electronic devices (Shintaro's phone and computer).

I like writing a lot about their intimacy, but now that Ene can move around in the real world and so he can take her places, like to the amusement park.

Also just for those who aren't familiar with my AU ideas. My depictions of my ships (including their bedroom intimacy), are ALWAYS mutually consensual. I always make sure to make my depictions as healthy as possible. Like we're dealing with a chara who's basically the equivalent of a serial killer causing a time loop tragedy

Ene hate fucks Kuroha, acting on her messy complicated feelings (and secretly, desire) for him, and Kuroha loves teasing her. In Kuroha/Saeru's words, they indulge in pleasure together. From Kuroha's end it's not hate, but interest and curiosity.

Ene tries to convince herself that she's just doing this with him to defeat him, but Kuroha tells her the real reason - she seeks warmth and companionship, and because of his knowledge of the previous routes (past timelines) and experiences, he knows her and her desires intimately.

In canon verse, their relationship is so messy and complicated and angst heavy and tinged with tragedy, and that's what makes it fun~~

Though ofc I also enjoy dealing with them in more lighthearted AUs too. They deserve to just be cute together in fanon AUs

God, this ship is so fucking spicy. I looove how much conflict and tension they have. I'm remembering why I was so in love with them AHHH.

I think Ene's assertive, bold and brazen, cheeky, competitive personality fits so well with someone like Kuroha/Saeru. They fit sooo well together.

Cuz while she doesn't actually have the upper hand, like she only "wins" against him in their "games" cuz he lets her, she can still surprise him with how predictably unpredictable she is. And just having that little win over him is good enough for her.

Kuroha obliges and lets her top/dominate him. He is interested to see how things play out with Ene leading their intimacy, cuz he wants to see how far she'll go when she wants something (him). Like her topping just proves she WANTS to do this with him, no matter what she says (since Ene is very tsundere).

KuroEne rambles

One more thing: As I said before, Ene seems very… bottom ngl, but I wanted her to be more assertive and dominant to match someone like Kuroha/Saeru to at least balance things out more… alleviate the power imbalance slightly. Ene is very bold and brazen and confrontational. It's fun when she takes charge and takes the lead in their intimacy too! Kuroha obliges and lets her.

Also, I said this before that, in canon verse, Kuroha/Saeru inherently has a power imbalance with every character that he could be paired with due to his context (ie. power in physical strength and power over knowledge). Though, that's not inherently a bad thing.

Imo you just need to tread carefully with Kuroha's ships so that they're still portrayed with care. Like imo it can still be done. I do make sure to make the relationship and setting as healthy as possible, at least, as healthy as you can get with Kuroha/Saeru, anyways.

Cuz I needed something to balance how, in Kuroha ship AUs, Kuroha/Saeru clearly weaponizes his words and knowledge against the chara he's paired with, with how he knows about Ene's love for Haruka, her special, complicated relationship and friendship with Konoha, and her personal vulnerabilities and secrets.

And even letting her have that form of control in intimacy is still like playing a game to him. The knowledge that he could take back that control at any time, still plays up to and feeds his ego.

Cuz Kuroha would be all like, "Oh, you think you're in control here, just because I'm letting you do what you want?"

He'd be interested to see how things play out with Ene leading cuz he wants to see how far she'll go when she wants something (him).

Kuroha knows that Ene thinks that she's the one who's in charge of the situation, the one in charge of their bedroom intimacy, just because he willingly gives up control. Ene would be surprised with how… seemingly calm and compliant he is about it, and so, decides to take the lead.

But he knows who's really in charge of their intimacy. It's an ego boost for him.

Ofc I like submissive bottom Ene too cuz it fuels my gay side, but more assertive dominant Ene also drives me crazy. Love both <333

Ene: I got it!!! I'm going to use my Ultra~ Cute~ Cyber Girl~ Techniques on you and seduce you and impress you with my skills!! Just watch!!! (>:D) Kuroha: Cut it out with the jokes, will you? (^-^)

God, this ship is so fucking spicy. I looove how much conflict and tension they have. I'm remembering why I was so in love with them AHHH

I think Ene's assertive, bold and brazen, competitive personality is the perfect fit to counter someone like Kuroha/Saeru. They fit sooo well together. Out of Kuroha/Saeru's possible ships, they make SUCH a good ship.

I think that ship-wise, Ene and Shintaro work best with Kuroha/Saeru, due to the special relationship they had with Haruka, and now Konoha.

Some of my fave lines that I wrote

Kuroha tells Ene that he'll take her to the brink of "pleasure"

Kuroha: I'll let you taste the biting fangs of love, and the intoxicating poison of pleasure… Kuroha: And yet, you crave this, Ene. You knowingly drink from the fountain of poison. Kuroha: I'll take you even further… I'll push you to the brink, and let you fall with me into the abyss. Ene—

Like aghhhh these ones are so good

Some of the most banger dialogue I've ever written has been for my JuAli AU and KuroEne AU like OMGGG

Other rambles

Ene realizes that Kuroha/Saeru's retention of memories, and recounts of their intimate moments together, are WAY too "clear" and vivid and specific to make up on the spot. Like it fully explains why he knows sm about her (her past, wants, and desires, and bedroom preferences). He's not lying.

We actually don't know how clear Saeru's retention of memories of previous routes is, so in my KuroEne AU, I just assumed he remembers everything in specific detail. Like a memory bank you can draw upon.

I feel like Ene gets mad at him when Kuroha/Saeru starts flaunting his knowledge of her from previous routes, especially their moments of intimacy together, cuz to her, it makes it seem like he is not taking her seriously. But Kuroha probably tells her that he IS taking her seriously, and that he would not be here, playing the game with her, if he wasn't.

Ene: You started doing it so many times it started to become like a game to you...! Kuroha: Is that what it seems like to you, Ene? Oh, but I am taking you very seriously. Your anger, hatred, and desire… They all fuel me. Kuroha: You are mistaken about that, Ene. I wouldn't be here if I wasn't, hm? Since we are both participants in this game of ours—

Ene: Maybe because you started learning, after doing this so many times— When did you start pretending to be human? Ene: Snake of Clearing Eyes. I want to fog up your eyes……

She probably bites back to him that, him getting to know and bond with them before killing them, is honestly even more cruel than just killing them. It's like building a tower of blocks only to tear it down yourself, and his "playing around with peoples' lives" is like experimenting with taking out said blocks just to see it all come crashing down (ie. like the block game Jenga)

And Kuroha probably tells her that he will not give up his goals/plans (since he wants to live forever). Since he is someone inherently dark and selfish (unlike the rest of the KagePro cast), he will continue to go through with causing the "Tragedy" because he sees it as a way so that he can live forever, and also, a way to meet the other party again (in this case, Ene), endlessly, forever and ever. He prioritizes his own plans/motives.

He tells her that he is the observer of the world since the beginning of time, has seen its past, and while he knows how each route will end up, at the very end (the inevitable outcome), he cannot predict the future, and so, he experiments with different possibilities. He wants to see where each of those possibilities take him, this time, and the next, next, time. What fuels him is "curiosity."

He knows Ene, and wants to know more about her, to add to his knowledge, to continue to indulge in "pleasure" with her, to see what's the same and what's different from previous routes.

Ene, someone who generally avoids confronting her feelings, doesn't want to face and confront the fact that the one who knows her most intimately (in the context of a KuroEne ship AU), is her greatest enemy.

Unsorted Dialogue Scripts

As always, you can read more about my rambles about them under the cut! I love them sm~

5/13 Rambles

At one point I was considering Ene saying "I love you Haruka" repeatedly when she fucks him (Kuroha) to try and drown out the reality of who she's actually doing this with, and Kuroha teasingly saying "Saying someone else's name during sex is such a bad habit of yours" but I thought that might be a little too cruel ADHDSJJDSJ.

I decided against it mainly cuz Ene refuses to think of Konoha as "Haruka" and calls him an impostor instead. She wouldn't see them as the same.

5/15 ~ 5/16 Rambles

Me when I realize I can just yoink the CopyBot concept for my KuroEne AU 🖤 💙

This is how we serve 🫡 LMAO

NetsuAi (Netto/Iris) my beloved 🧡 💜 🦋 The only good MLW ship in MMBN/EXE

I was just thinking about this but imo having something similar to a CopyBot from BN6 (Mega Man Battle Network 6) in my KuroEne AU could actually be a solution for Ene not being able to manifest into the real world

Like, I was thinking of having something similar to a CopyBot, except it's a humanoid android/robot body with human flesh that Ene can just transfer into? And when it runs out of battery, she just goes back to the cyber world.

Similar to how Iris (MMBN/EXE) does.

Except the Copybots in BN6 don't have human flesh, they're just default base bodies that just take the appearance/form of the NetNavi (Network Navigator, peoples' digital companion AIs in MMBN/EXE) that's currently in it.

And the CopyBots have a safety lock mechanism, so they can't use Battle Chips or go rogue or anything. And the CopyBots need to be charged when they run out of battery.

The MMBN (Rockman.exe) anime has the Dimensional Areas (artificially created field in which NetNavis can materialize in the real world) too but I think having something similar to a CopyBot would be the best bet

I don't watch Sci-fi movies but I'm sure there are sci-fi movies that explore similar kinds of concepts.

Kuroha/Saeru has knowledge from everything from the start of civilization… Shintaro in the KagePro LNs compares Saeru to "a living encyclopedia with a full grasp of everything from the start of civilization up to modern science."

I can't even imagine the amount of knowledge he has in his possession. That amount of knowledge is unfathomable to me. Absolutely insane.

So that LN bit confirms that Kuroha/Saeru carries knowledge of the history of mankind and its technologies over (probably) millions or thousands of years.

Especially when Japanese scientists in 2022 figured how to develop living human-like skin on a robot that can heal when cut. So yeah I definitely think he could get it done (especially for the sake of my KuroEne AU)

KuroEne Rambles

Actually I'm gonna call KuroEne a big brain rare pair, cuz it's very sense making to me. Wouldn't be the first time I big-brained with a rare pair (ie. KuroEne (KagePro), IdaTatsu (WATGBS AU), JuAli (Magi), EdRich (ROTRK), HaoRen (SK))

When I was first returning to KagePro, I initially thought that the Kuroha = Saeru reveal made it harder to work with my ship in canon-verse, but ever since then, I've still found tons of ways to make my ship work in canon-verse AUs, and KuroEne's concept is spicy as hell imo.

KuroEne is using HaruTaka and KonoEne as a basis for the ship. It's so sexy because they have the most conflict/tension and angst of all of Takane/Ene's "Haruka lookalike" harem ships (/lh), due to Kuroha being the main antagonist, and main source of tension/conflict in KagePro's plot (as the main instigator of tragedy)

Canon-verse KuroEne is an angsty af ship, it's something intense, like something poised to strike. There's much higher stakes in it, and I love interesting conflict/tension <333

I was just thinking about this like in Manga Route 2, Saeru possesses Hibiya's body and talks about how "Despair" is the root emotion that drives human wishes (and strong desire), which is why he needs to keep the despair going.

He wants to keep driving Marry and the Mekakushi Dan's despair to force Marry to reset the timeline to continue the tragedy forever.

Despair and desperation drives desire, to him. That definitely makes sense. But I would also put in my 2 cents that "Pleasure" is what drives human desire. And excitement and fulfillment.

And with someone as ancient as him, who possesses knowledge all the way from the birth of civilization to the modern age… Saeru must understand that. Since he takes pleasure and excitement in killing the Mekakushi Dan.

His desires and motivations are dark and selfish. He prioritizes his goals and self-preservation above all else. That's what makes a character like him so fun.

Like eventually, with enough time loop resets, he's gonna get bored of JUST killing everyone. Kuroha should explore what "Pleasure" and the pursuit of pleasure really means. And sensual pleasures are apart of that.

My KuroEne AU is basing itself on this concept, that eventually, Kuroha/Saeru is gonna start experimenting and messing around and playing around with different possibilities and find new ways to entertain himself.

In my KuroEne AU, he entertains and goes along with the ideas of actually getting to know the Mekakushi Dan members before moving forward with the "Tragedy" (his plan to force Marry to reset the world). He gets to bond and spend time with them for once, and he finds that this makes things new and interesting and exciting.

So it makes sense to me that in ship AU settings, he would eventually delve in pleasure (and pleasure in all its forms), including sensual pleasures, like intimacy.

The only love that Kuroha/Saeru would possess would inevitably be very dark and selfish, because he is that way, at his core. And so, you could bring in THIS sort of element into Kuroha ship AUs (and in my case, my KuroEne AU)

"If I keep doing this (forcing the world to reset), then I'll get to meet you forever and ever, for all of eternity… Doesn't that sound wonderful?"

Kuroha/Saeru should tell Ene something like, "Sensual pleasures are the most primal and raw form of connection, after all?"

Similar to Douman and Kiara's "illness filled love - craving heart" but he lacks their softer traits. Cuz Douman and Kiara respectively ABSOLUTELY show much softer/tender sides to people they love.

It just makes sense to me that someone as ancient as Kuroha would eventually explore different pleasures and ways to amuse himself? Like I'm reminded of Idate (WATGBS AU) is ~500 years old in our WATGBS AU's lore, represents "Pleasure" and "Emptiness"

Idate is a void demon who represents emptiness and constantly indulges in his own greed and pursuit of pleasure and excitement to drown out the sorrow he feels. But he still feels "empty" inside cuz the pleasure wasn't enough. At some point, sensual pleasures, etc., didn't feel fulfilling anymore. The orca twins Idate and Takama have never known soft love, only survival and death, and so, Idate struggles with feelings of loneliness and apathy.

Why Ene would even be intimate with Kuroha in my KuroEne AU:

I'd imagine that she'd feel very conflicted about him. She hates him but also feels strangely drawn to him. And well… Ene is in a very peculiar situation to begin with, with him. She is acting on her curiosity.

Imagine the main big bad villain being a guy who is in the body and has the face and voice of the person you loved (Haruka), is in the body of the person who's your friend that you can't help but have a soft spot around (Konoha), and looks exactly just like them but with a darkened colour palette, and is the guy who's been killing you and all your friends as the main big bad, who knows all your secrets and everything about you, and your Eye Ability, and your past, etc.,

Like this situation is fucking surreal.

This then gives them a "strange" kind of connection, largely due to curiosity (that Ene can't help but have), despite hating him. She acts on her curiosity and desire and need for connection.

KuroEne AU rambles

In my KuroEne AU, Kuroha/Saeru refers to his memories of being intimate with Ene in previous routes (timelines) as "dances" because it's a deliberate reference to Ene's gamer name back when she was a human (Takane), "Lightning Dancer Ene"

So yeah it's basically him showing off his knowledge, just how much he knows.

Kuroha/Saeru ships are like the only time I have ships where one chara has THIS MUCH of an advantage or leverage over the other in the ship, in terms of knowledge and physical capabilities (and also due to Kuroha's character role and set-up of constantly killing the main cast)

At first, Ene's in utter disbelief, like WHY does this guy know SO much about her (things that only her friends from 2 years ago would know, especially Haruka), but then, when she finds out about his identity as the Snake of Clearing Eyes, and the sheer amount of knowledge in his possession due to his nature as an Eye Ability Snake, it makes more sense to her.

Also, he does it to be poetic, since he's teasing her enough. Dude is fucking ancient, he's older than human civilization itself, according to the KagePro universe and worldbuilding lore

Referring to Part 1 of my KuroEne AU rambles post:

Just a headcanon but I'd imagine the olden/archaic speech patterns to transfer over a bit… Though he probably adapts well due to his knowledge.

Takane's full online gamer name was “Dancing Flash Ene” (閃光の舞姫・エネ, Senkou no Maihime - Ene), where Maihime (舞姫) means "Dancer girl.” The name Ene comes from Enomoto Takane

KuroEne Rambles (Misc)

Saeru was created as an Eye Ability Snake in response to Azami's first, original, strongest desire - She wanted to know who she was. But Saeru watched Azami's desire change from wanting to know who she was to caring for her family, and holds a disdain for humans and the world for changing his Master's wish. The "desire" that created him in the first place, his purpose, and his existence, was eventually forgotten by her.

He was created for the purpose of fulfilling wishes. But once that purpose is fulfilled, he'll disappear. So he makes sure to never completely fulfill his host's wishes.

Also, I just realized KuroEne technically have a parallel going on. Ene has a pseudo immortal body due to Ene's Eye Ability, Opening Eyes (目が覚め, Me ga Sameru), and Kuroha/Saeru wants to preserve his own life (by forcing Marry to reset the world), and live forever through infinite loop resets, and continue living on at least until his purpose is fulfilled.

[ninhaoma-ya]

Chapter 1079 — The Red-Haired Pirates - An Emperor’s Crew

All rights, so the formation of Neo-MADS wrapped up the Germa cover story arc. Wonder when we'll see those guys again – and on which side of the upcoming war.

Anyways.

I read the chapter.

And then took a break.

Went for a walk. Pondered life. Cursed Odacchi's name to the heavens and thanked the universe for bringing us such a masterful storyteller.

Nothing for it but to go through it.

First off, an update on Egghead: Confirmation on York's plan and what happened before this. She ordered S-Snake to unfreeze her later and adds another mystery; which area can't be damaged? However, it is clear York isn't the brightest bulb: the 'hostages' refer to the P-agents, I assume, and we've seen how much the Government cares for those guys in the past. Not a very good hostage.

Chaos on Egghead, people trying to get away. Will they manage, or will the navy blast them to kingdom come?

However, on the outside…

…THINGS ARE NOT LOOKING GOOD.

a) The Hearts didn't manage to take down Blackbeard's ship

b) That looks very much like a certain fluffy cap and cursed sword…

c) Not to get ahead of things, but when looking at the end of the chapter… o_O

Welp. Before we get there, we have several pages more to go through.

Shank's minions are adorably weak. At least Luffy has some power in his fleet.

It's not very healthy to build an organisation on the shoulders of one person, though… you really should take a look at that, Red-Haired allies.

Shanks, also known as "Fair". Awfully nice of him to check if his opponent is up for it before attacking.

Nice little bit of characterisation going on here:

Obviously Shanks' crew is almost as well-informed as Big Mom's, with the ready-prepped information package casually tossed his way. It's also interesting that Oda hides his eyes when he mentions the rampaging (which was one of the first things we learned about Kid when he was introduced into the story: he doesn't care about casualties). I know it is completely my interpretation, but it seems like Shanks is not happy about the unnecessary casualties caused.

However, Kid is also interesting here. Based on his history, he probably would have attacked the weaker fleet members as well. But we don't know to what extent. Would he have used the Damned Punk cannon then? Here Killer provides some info for him: there's a lot of bounties (i.e. dangerous people in the Government's eyes) on those ships. Why then be careful with your attack when you can take out several threats at once, especially when the weaker ones now are out of harm's way?

As hinted at, Shanks is one of the most powerful haki users in the world, here confirmed by quite a long future sight. Luffy's and Katakuri's observation allowed them a few seconds into the future, while this looks to be a bit longer than that.

And he does not hold back!

After years of "When will Shanks make his move?" he does, and it is glorious.

Aaaw, they care so much about each other.

Kid's crew is a nice foil to Luffy's, in that they care about him (as we saw already on Wano) and he would do anything for them (as we saw in Udon) and they seem like a nice little collection of oddballs. And yet, they are the Straw Hats without the compassion and empathy for others. They care only about each other, not about the consequences of their actions for others.

Before we get to the finish, remember how Shanks asked Dorry and Brogy to help? If we look back to chapter 128 and Little Garden, just for a size comparison with the Merry:

They are huge.

(And that is one pretty panel. Love the contrast of their mantles with the sea and sky.)

Yes, you will.

And keeping at Little Garden:

What a thought. Will the Sky Island snakes make a comeback at some point?

And… what a terrifyingly familiar pose.

That is a blast and a half.

I don't think Kid is dead, however. As someone else said, the phrasing mirrors what happened with the Straw Hats at Sabaody pre-timeskip:

They met their match and some, but will probably survive. Maybe learn some humility, maybe learn some restraint when it comes to rampaging.

That might be the end for Kid's pirate journey, though, with his Lode Poneglyphs gone (so they had at least Big Mom's and Kaido's, I assume) and ship gone.

But, going back to the start of the chapter: it doesn't look too good for the Hearts either…

I wonder where the fourth Lode Poneglyph is. Kaido had one, Big Mom had one, one is on Zou, and one… we don't know, do we?

Great chapter, although the break next week will break my spirit. I give it the edge of my seat and my now broken stress ball.

[mister13eyond]

I deleted a reblog because I did it when over-exhausted and it felt mean, but I just wanted to say for posterity: I'm begging the Jojo fandom to reconsider making the "He's not even Italian!" joke about Giorno.

Look, I'm not one to say you have to bring real-world morality into a series about a vampire's son taking over the mafia with a magic ghost. I have "problematic" ships, I like writing and reading the crime thriller aspect of the series despite the real-world harm caused by the mafia and organized crime; I like the character with absolutely horrible representation of DID. I think some acceptance that things are okay in fiction that aren't in real life is healthy.

But joking that Giorno- a character who has lived in Italy for 11 years, since he was 4 years old, and who faced racist and xenophobic abuse by his peers precisely BECAUSE he was Japanese - isn't "really Italian" bleeds outside the boundaries of fiction and into real-world microaggressions that real API people face. We've all heard some racist white person ask an Asian peer "where you're REALLY from"; We've all heard the horrendous chant of "go back to your own country" in racist tirades. It's a joke that falls back on old, tired, shitty perspectives- that even though someone has lived in a country since they were a little child, they're never going to be REALLY Italian, because they'll always be Japanese first and foremost.

It's not that it's bad to joke about things we know are bad; it's that the joke seems to fail to acknowledge what's so bad about it in the first place. It's that it conflates ethnicity and country of origin with nationality, citizenship or even just a sense of home. It's that the core of the joke is "Giorno doesn't really belong here; he's Japanese, not Italian, and no matter how long he lives here, he'll never be Italian by blood." It's just... not funny anymore, frankly.

Leave it behind with "MILF hunter Kakyoin" and using the c-slur for Johnny Joestar; we as a fandom can make FAR funnier jokes.

[johnnys-green-pen]

I get why people ship Roy and Johnny but I kinda hopped off the ship after Roy tells Johnny he’s being sensitive about Chet’s Indian jokes. even tho Johnny made one the end (he s definitely being sarcastic I think) it seemed…idk

You know, that's the first time I've seen somebody cite that scene as a reason why they doesn't ship Johnny/Roy, which is genuinely fascinating. I definitely get why that'd be a deal breaker to you, especially because that's not the only time where Roy's kind of being an ass in a very similar kind of way - there's also the whole "Roy calls Johnny a nut and he takes it personally" bit in "Crash" for instance and if you want to widen the scope somewhat, I guess Roy assuming Johnny is moping about having been dumped while Johnny's still dealing with Drew's death in "Frequency" falls into a similar category, too.

It's definitely not great.

(It's extra not great in Peace Pipe because of the casual racism, but I guess we should probably cut the show some slack on account of its age, especially because they raised a couple other points in that episode that were way ahead of its time. Still, though - YIKES)

(I don't think this is a shipping issue, though - Roy's behavior is just as unacceptable looking at them platonically given how close they are in canon. Shitty friends aren't any better than shitty romantic partners, if you ask me)

(also, I personally don't think Johnny was being sarcastic with that joke; I think that was his attempt at finding a compromise because he's notoriously eager to please, cares entirely too much about what Roy thinks, and figured making the jokes on his terms was good enough for him. Which... honestly just makes the scene that much worse, because he clearly never should have had to feel like he had to make that joke)

The thing that makes me stick with it anyway is that it doesn't really make Roy care any less, I guess. Sure, Roy is an emotionally constipated numbskull who could store his empathy in a thimble with room to spare sometimes*, but he does genuinely seem to care a great deal about Johnny, even if he doesn't always understand him.

Is that a healthy relationship dynamic? Not really, not if it leads to Roy invalidating Johnny's feelings like he did in that scene, but I would like to think that Roy has it in him to grow and actually get his shit together eventually.

So, yeah, they're not perfect; Roy pretty obviously not, and Johnny quite frankly has his moments, too. Whether that's a deal breaker or not as far as shipping is concerned is up to each one of us individually, and I wouldn't want to convince anyone to ship something they're not comfortable with. I personally think they're within range to make it work and I do think they have the potential to make each other better people; you might disagree and that's perfectly understandable, too.

(I guess to some extent the mild fucked-up-ness is part of why I think the ship's interesting; there's some great dramatic fic potential in Roy caring, but still fucking it up)

I'm pretty much just rambling and there isn't really much of a point to this; sorry for that.

I wasn't entirely sure what kind of a reply you were looking for; I hope I managed to get it right!

Anyway, thanks for the ask (and for giving me an opportunity to ramble about imperfections or something); it's always interesting to hear about other people's fandom experiences!

*incidentally, I could go off for ages about theories as to why he is like that, but A) this isn't the place for it, B) we'd still be here tomorrow, and C) that still doesn't excuse his behavior.

[ssaalexblake]

... so u can’t ship that f/m pairing b/c it’s slightly codependent (even that’s arguable) but you’re totally fine with shipping a white m/m pairing where one of them is a literal nazi and seriously injured the other half of said pair + added psychological damage done to them also????? 

srsly... people and their white m/m pairings need to fucking stop 

[voltronramblings]

hi there !! id love to get a match-up if it isn't too much trouble. c: im a 5'2, female, panromantic demisexual. im an Aquarius/melancholic/INFP/Hufflepuff. im curvy and very pale. i have brown hair and hazel eyes. i struggle with depression and anxiety although I have been prescribed antidepressants. i have a resting sad face and am usually lost in thought so i might seem a bit spaced out as well. [ part 1 ]

when im introduced to people im polite but very shy and i don’t talk with people im unfamiliar with unless they talk to me. but with my friends i am a bit more open and i really like to make my them laugh. i am a very chill person but i also cry really easily and am pretty sensitive. i don’t talk a lot unless talking about something im passionate about. i also struggle with self worth/confidence and body image issues. i am obsessed with musicals and absolutely adore acting in general as well as music. i love to sing and people seem to really like my voice. I own and play a ukulele and am taking piano lessons. i like to imagine different scenarios in my head and always have my head in the clouds. i love cats and the sound of rain. my favorite color is green. i love my family and friends with all my heart and just want them to be happy and healthy.

Wow, several people here are melancholic, while I’m the only melancholic I know in real life. Wow! Sorry, this took so long, hun. I hope you find it (lowkey why I feel bad for people who send in anon asks like my match-ups take forever, I’m sorry). I  ship you with Keith!

Main reason: hypothetical scenario. You’re different enough to balance Keith, but not his complete opposite to the point where he’d be annoyed by you. If anything, when you first met, he’d find you to be an interesting character in his life and as he grew closer to you, he’d discover things about you that he liked that he never actually expected to like. 

Appearance reason: you say you have a resting sad face and that you space out a lot, so I can see Keith just staring at you absentmindedly, trying to figure out exactly what you may or may not be thinking about. And he always worries about if something he said had made you sad, but really, you’re just hoping that Hunk is gonna make pigs in a blanket for dinner.

Hobby reason: Keith never admits it, but he actually likes music. Naturally, this usually tended towards a sort of rock, pop-punk feel, but ever since meeting you he’s been interested in softer music. 

Similarity reason: You and Keith seem like generally quiet people with very strong passions. We all know that Keith is also a quiet person, but if you’ve watched season three… you know that he is very passionate about the things he cares about. So, as long as your fiery passions don’t clash, you would be a strong pairing.

Crack reason: He’s red. You’re green. CHRISTMAS (note: if you don’t celebrate Christmas, I promise I’m not trying to offend you, I just thought it was cute, please don’t be mad, i’m weakhearted)

[hikaaa-bi]

idk anything about locked tomb but that part of intentional writing is what I wanted to talk about for a while now.

when i criticized catra or c//a, i remember someone asking "oh so we aren't allowed to have toxic characters or ships anymore? not everything has to be a cautionary tale, sometimes horrible things just happen in fiction."

to which I say, first off, props to you for acknowledging that c//a is indeed toxic. secondly, it's all about the framing. your audience aren't idiots, it's usually very easy to recognize when an author thinks a certain idea is okay and don't see anything wrong with it. if you're going to show a toxic person in your story and you are aware that they are toxic, the framing would imply that this is not ideal, it's just a disturbing idea explored in fiction.

for example, in the 2019 film Joker, we follow the journey of a normal man suffering with mental health issues slowly turn into a deranged criminal. the framing is important here. Joker's arc isn't framed as a good thing, he is not a hero for murdering multiple people and while he is a sympathetic character, the narrative does not justify his actions.

meanwhile, in spop, catra's toxicity seems to be unintentional. well not unintentional, but the framing makes it so that she deserved to take her anger out on people, she deserved to abuse Adora and Scorpia, and she still deserved to get Adora as her girlfriend. the framing makes it so that Catra is always the victim and that Catra deserves forgiveness without even working for it. it doesn't look like an intentionally toxic relationship, it looks like a toxic relationship disguised as a completely healthy romantic relationship.

Hello, saw some of your anti c//a that mention how you think c//a is a bad enemies-to-lovers ship while griddlehark is a good one, and may i ask how that is? Genuine question, because i don’t like c//a, and i’m neutral on griddlehark (mainly because I don’t know much atm), from what i’ve seen/heard, it seems like it’s a lot more toxic of a dynamic than c//a is initially/pre canon? Again not trying to bait, am gen curious /genuine

This is going to be kind of disjointed, and I apologise, but this is kind of a topic that defies a simple summary.

Bear in mind that ahead be big Locked Tomb spoilers and the SP0P spoilers that basically everyone already knows.

I would say that the two critical differences are 1) the handling of the toxicity within the narrative, and 2) the structure and arrangement of the toxicity.

You are absolutely correct that pre-canon Griddlehark's mutual hatred is a toxic dynamic. They initially detest each other with a passion; one of the main plot points driving the entire series is a young Harrow having Gideon's blood under her nails after a fight.

As Gideon and Harrowhark work together, however - and here is the point where 100% of bad enemies-to-lovers arcs crash and burn - the toxicity goes down. It never becomes totally healthy - indeed, post-GtN Harrow invents an entirely new way to have an unhealthy relationship, involving performing brain surgery on herself at 17 - but the majority of the narrative is spent showing them moving from "would piss on the other's grave given the chance" to a mutually tolerated working relationship, to a growing loyalty, to the pool scene where Harrow shows Gideon more honesty and trust than she's had from anyone in her life. A lot of what makes this work is pacing and structure; every new step works because it's building on the previous ones, none of them feeling jarringly fast or unmotivated.

More than that, a big help is that the toxicity feels intentional. The relationship being Kinda Fucked is a 100% intentional thing that I'm pretty sure I've seen Tamsyn Muir talking about in interviews. It's a narrative element that Muir is monitoring and adjusting with the care of a good zookeeper trying to keep the humidity in the reptile enclosure exactly right.

(I genuinely cannot praise the writing in these books enough.)

Turning to SP0P as a contrast, its relationship has a more understated toxicity, but a much more pervasive one. Young Adora and C*tra weren't clawing at each other's faces whenever left unsupervised, but young C*tra sure did claw at Adora's face for wanting to have more than one friend! It's not the PVP arena of Growing Up Griddlehark, but "you are my friend, therefore your needs are subordinate to mine" is still far from a healthy dynamic, and the narrative never addresses it.

The bigger problem, though, is that the toxicity doesn't so much "go down" as trace out a parabola. The entire first half of the narrative shows the toxicity going up sharply, to the point of C*tra being willing to die just to make Adora miserable, then it hovers there for another quarter, and then it returns to an earlier level of toxicity. S5 C*tra's treatment of Adora stays awful. She spends "Taking Control" throwing a tantrum over how the real problem is Adora and the others being mad at her; she portrays herself as the wounded party in her like four separate murder attempts on Adora in "An Ill Wind" to produce the worst line of the show; she continues throwing tantrums whenever she doesn't get what she wants and making everything about herself right up to the love confession, including that confession ("stay with me, the person who spent four seasons refusing to stay with you!"). It feels bizarre that Adora goes from "even if you're my best friend, I won't let you blame me for shit that isn't my fault" in S4 to doing nothing but looking sad when C*tra portrays her as being in the wrong for not just meekly standing by while C*tra burned down her home and murdered her friends.

And - and I'll acknowledge that a big part of this is probably executive fuckery, I just don't think that really matters - the pacing and structure absolutely are not helping. I could buy S5's sudden reversal if C*tra and Adora had had a fun, weightless enmity where there was an obvious respect between them. They don't. C*tra spends a truly distressing amount of time utterly consumed by the desire to cause Adora as much pain as possible, to the point of attempting a murder-suicide on the entire world. No point in S2-S4 shows a C*tra who Can't Bring Herself to Really Hurt Adora, regardless of the things the stans have convinced themselves they saw; she's so totally driven by spite that she tears her own life to shreds in the hope Adora will be caught up in the edges. The relationship has to do a sudden R*ylo swerve rather than building on what's gone before because "what's gone before" is like three plot points in the first season that have been narratively overwhelmed by C*tra's multiseason campaign of cruelty like a single pea being weighed against the USS Nimitz.

This is where intentionality comes into play. The toxicity in c/a is just there. For all the bullshit about C*tra's story being about what happens when you're the toxic friend, it doesn't feel like an intentional narrative element that is seriously being examined; it feels like a writing fuck-up where C*tra was supposed to feel like way less of a stalker asshole.

Anyway, I hope this has made some vague semblance of sense, but I've been at this for like an hour and I'm tired and I need to go check on a craft project.