#(the class is my mutuals and followers)
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Nooooooouuu hyperfixation don’t leave meeeee ilyyyyy sobs
*4 anda half hour class of 09 playthrough appears*
NOOOOOO
#basically me rn#idk how this fandom is hey yall#i know some of the outsiders ppl i follow like class of 09 i hope yall see this and be my mutual if ur not already 💔💔#clarity speaks#co09#class of 09#emily class of 09#jecka class of 09#nicole co09#co09 jecka#co09 nicole#co09 emily#co09 ari#co09 kelly
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if any of you have had to get an mri before can you tell me what it was like? i have a 45 minute one next week and i am. not looking forward to it.
#hello beloved followers and mutuals who like knowing things about me#i have had to visit the hospital twice in the past week and am going back twice next week#both for brain stuff#one is just a general neurology and the other is the mri#im. not doing ok rn but im staying silly and engaging with my little crafts and joys of life#we!!! stay!!!! silly!!!!!!#i do feel a little like a lab rat with all the tests and stuff ive had to do. im just doing my best ok. they take so much blood from me :/#also couldn't this have happened sooner????? classes are starting next week and i have to keep going back to the hospital while not driving#eughhhhhhhhhh#we stay silly
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i can fill an elementary school classroom
#all my little students#i'd be such a good teacher#no i wouldn't actually#but genuinely wtf are u doing here#what did i do for u to be here#like i don't write i don't do art i don't contribute to society in any way#like??? very confused what are u doing here#and half of u are mutuals too#like i followed u and u we're like “ah yes a great person to talk to"#HUH??? WHAT??? HUHHHHHH?????#what are any of u doing here PLEASE I NEED ANSWERS#a class is not what i was expecting when i went to stare at my drafts#got me so distracted i almost forgot what i was doing#but please WHY???#☆— yapping
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i am being divinely punished for not learning to drive
#nonsense tag#ive had my learners for like three years#this is about the fact i feel like im being mindfreaked by f1#logically i know its frequency bias but i swear i cant escape it#what do u MEAN australian olympic gold medalist skateboarder keegan palmer is besties with lando norris#its like.. i join tennisblr (there is significant crossover with f1blr). i follow tennis players on instagram (oscar piastri is in all their#comments. holger goes to f1. aryna goes to f1.. many many players go to f1)#im trying to enjoy the tennis (f1 drivers r there. monte carlo. wimbledon. etc)#my sister also came back from a year overseas last october and she is super in to f1 (sibling bonding via me relaying what i see on my dash)#I CAMT EVEN GO TO THE TRAIN STATJON I GOT JUMPSCARWD BY A HEINEKEN AD#oh and my sister went to the dan murphys that was made to be dan ricciardos#i am safe nowhere#i make a post about this every month it feels like guys ur getting a live feed of my breakdown#ive never watched a vroom vroom i can barely keep up with hit ball over net#i didnt even know any driver names last year. now i could definitely name at least 10#i gotta say the impression i get of f1blr from my mutuals is. silly fun post with homoerotic undertones or. the most devastating web weave#known to man#guys im such a yapper im literally in class omg ill shut up now
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okay! it's Friday. robux art commissions open
3 slots (1/3) only bc im busy today... and a lot busier tomorrow but I guess I can make it work. also I have no time to make more/remake the gamepasses (which ur gona pay me through) so I'll just calculate how much robux you're gonna be giving me. thanks
commission info here
#classes in a few minutes this is why I'm busys😓😓😓sorry everyone (2pm for me rn)#if u message me on here (mutuals only if u dont have discord bc I have dms closed for ppl I don't follow) or send a friend req to my discor#while I'm gone then you're going to have to wait for a good while. sory#rambles#art commissions
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Why r u getting such wild asks 😭 imagine the oncler nude what?!
SDFGHJGFDGHJfGHGFDFGHJBNvdfghjkhgfds
SOME OF MY FRIENDS (@swampthing07 and @nico-the-overlordI AM TAlking about YOU) think it's funny to joke and act like i'm both in love with the onceler, and also i am the oncler himself, hence my intro thingy...
THIS HAPPENS A LOT
and suprisingly, it is not the wildest running joke we have. far from it even.
#keter class asks#i am sorry#but i actually don't care#but also i am SORRY#that anyone had to read that one TvT#i have too many mutuals at this point#because there's those two#and sometimes another person#and then the rest of my 109 followers just have to deal with tha
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i need to calm down
#havent cried in like months so ofc now is when my body decides to try#in the middle of class#im just so frustrated#im so mad at my doctors for lowering my adderall dose when iw as doing good on the 20 mg#i dont know if its the depression or what but i cant fucking focus im so overwhelmed#shark speaks#i hope i can go home and have a good cry and eat something yummy#i feel so behind and liek im scrambbling to catch up#and its only a few weeks in#and because of that all my other doubts and worries about the future are piling on#sorry mutuals if your reading this and followed me for horizons stuff#this is still my personal blog tho so i gotta vent somehwo
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Being involved in a local mutual aid group for the last year and a half has definitely impacted the angle space archives has been veering toward
#it was never going to be a 'scrappy protags topple the evil corporation'#it was always deliberately low stakes low impact. one small forgotten story#but I was asking myself what does the optimistic activist flashback character do#and went duh. mutual aid.#she fought the corporations head on for a while and then went what is a better use of my time#focusing on fighting people I hate or helping people I love#meanwhile so many of the protag's issue tie back to her embracing a toxic individuality mindset#which is common in the field and economic class she has ambitions toward#even though most regular people follow a more community oriented model#that's not really resolved for her but idk if that needs to be fixed or if it's just how it is sometimes#space archives
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hi! is anyone still alive here :> its been THREE years since i've touched this site my god
#was forced to write fiction for a class the other day and the fanfiction itch came back#i've written 10k of xiaoven in the past 24 hours what is wrong with me#posting on here cause i'm assuming mutuals from back then actually follow my main blog AHAHA
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🗡
#@my dsa dept: kill yourself.#like please just die. no one is gonna be sad about it i promise#do you feed off of students' tears. every time i think you've reached rock bottom you hit a new low#no that's all i have to say. kill yourselves.#like kindly perish. that's all#vagueposting the shit out of tumblr dot com#anyway mutuals and followers pray for me. i am going to fail todays (surprise) evaluated lab#THEY PROMISED US THEY WOULDN'T HAVE ONE TODAY. regular class on debugging they said. it'll be ungraded they said.#as if we haven't had enough tests this week.#kys#college hateposting
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My tumblr usage has gotten really bad actually and it’s a massive problem. For the past few weeks I’ve felt like there aren’t enough hours in the day, and while that can partially be attributed to classes starting up, I think it’s cause I use this goddamn app for hours upon hours upon hours. I always tell myself that I can just pick it up for 15 mins and then put it down again no problem. I can’t. Because I give myself another five minutes and another five minutes and another five minutes and then it’s been two hours and I STILL won’t log off. I’ve limited access on my phone, which will hopefully keep me off tumblr outside of specific times and allow me now more than two hours per day on the app. If you see me reblogging posts tomorrow before 9:30 AM EST it means I failed and need to figure out how to make my phone’s screen times work. If you shoot me an ask, message, or reply and I don’t respond immediately? Chances are I’ve hit that mark and will be unavailable until the next day (unless I use my computer). I’m hoping to NOT hit that mark though, so I’ll try be on here less in general. It’s genuinely so bad for me. I waste so much time on here and I NEED to cut back on it sooner rather than later.
#if the time limit thing doesn’t work I might cut it down to 1.5 or even 1 hour on the app per day#might also log off or delete the app temporarily#I like this app and there’s so many cool people I’m mutuals with or following#and it’s nice to be able to post my theories and art and headcanons but i also think it’s just. really really bad for me currently#downtime (which will hopefully keep me OFF THE DAMN APP) is from 10:00 PM EST to 9:30 AM EST#logging off tumblr on my computer to create another roadblock between me and this hellsite. going back to the blissful days where I only#logged on to desktop to post art and then leave again. those were the days…#so hopefully this means you won’t be seeing me active until after my classes are done
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was any recent era of mine worse than early 2022. remembering that january and february and just thinking wow that was truly the trenches i should stop complaining about my life right now huh. imagine for a moment you’re coming off your bleakest semester ever. and that’s including the one where you almost killed yourself and the ones where there was a global pandemic. fall 21 was hell for me i felt like a monster from a fairy tale or perhaps the cheese from diary of a wimpy kid the whole time. and then there was winter break and i was happy being at home. and then there was cobra kai season four, my third obsessive cobra kai era and also my last. all three were utterly horrific i was never well at any point during any of those three eras. (the september/october 2020 one when i saw seasons 1 and 2, the january 2021 one when 3 dropped were the other two) anyway and THEN the mere thought of going back to college made me want to vomit profusely and perhaps shoot myself in the head so then we had my loser ass gap semester where i took one gened class because i was worried that if i took the whole semester off i’d never go back so i just did one easy peasy class and started working retail. and the whole time remember i was still in and coming down from aforementioned cobra kai era. and then march came. i don’t mean to be dramatic but that march saved my life. changed everything. helena you have no idea the role you played in me not killing myself fr wow. context: this was around the time i started talking to helena, who was watching shadowhunters, and wanting to read the books. and because of that i remembered how much EYE liked those books and i got back into THAT obsession. now for those of you that haven’t been around long it may seem like i’ve always been weird about tsc but from like 2019 to that march i was like fully not even thinking about anything related to that franchise at all ever. which is crazy to think about like maybe that’s why i was so depressed that whole time damn. anyway so that was when i got back into tsc. and sincerely i think that actually saved me for real and seriously. and of course. in a rube goldberg like chain reaction THAT led to the horrors which were terrible but really in hindsight the horrors were not that bad because tee and i went through them together and formed an unbreakable bond <3 but wow those early months of 2022…. it’s never been more bleak than it was then
#yes fall 21 really was that bad. yes it really was worse than the semester i wanted to kill myself.#i can’t get into it it makes me sad to think about#but actually fun story. not really. i know someone now that i’m pretty sure i met in one of my classes then#i am not 100% sure and i haven’t asked her yet because we don’t really talk#we have a mutual friend and are in that stupid history class together#and frankly. if she’s the same person. she was the only person i knew that fall who didn’t contribute to making me feel bad all the time#oh i have that class tomorrow i need to remember to ask her that would be crazy if it was her. i think it was#anyway. whatever. just reminiscing about february 2022 because i found out that was when i first watched redacted movie#well i guess it’s only redacted to the tumblr only followers and mutuals. the letterboxd gang will know#although i’d prefer if no one knew. letterboxd mutuals look away from my activity tonight
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.......
#seeing relatively famous people looking at my insta stories is always funny to me#like there is 2 music producers#a few actors#some 'influencers' i've worked with#and they just look at my stupid stories#Los Angeles is the second city in my stats to give you an idew#and yet i have under 200 followers there#it's just funny#like yeah those are regular people but still#i have a one of the LoT writer who check my accouht from timesto time too despite not following me#i just interviewed him like 4 years ago for a class and he sometimes remember i exist i guess xD#and i do not know those people okay#we're mutuals but i dont know them#i would not even dare go ask them for job contacts#which is the irony here i feel like
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🤠
#for any mutuals following my Major Chronicles (aka figuring out wtf i’m doing with school)#i think i have some good news#so i was mistaken before in thinking the business admin major only had an Econ/finance minor it can actually have any business minor#which is dumb as hell because if you’re paying out the ass for school you should be able to take any minor with any major. but i digress#basically i can transfer the coding classes i already have into an info systems minor so i wouldn’t have to take 16 classes—#i think it’s 15. maybe even 14 but one of those is vague so i’ll have to talk to my advisor#but yeah i may or may not have to take one more coding class but that’s fine tbh & then after that it’ll be over#business will still be boring as hell & i’ll have to use excel a lot which i hate. but it’s the lesser of two evils & i think—#my mental health will be a lot better#i haven’t been divulging exactly how I’ve been feeling lately but it’s kinda the worst in my entire life lmao so i’m glad i can kinda fix i#rose.txt
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so has tumblr updated itself twice in the last 3 hours for me?
#dude you don’t need to show in words who’s my mutual or who i’m following like some sort of class system#just be normal about this#or go back to the gray vs white background distinction that was fine#peach rambles
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In grade 11 (age 16), i hated this one guy so intensely that i tried to get my frenemy to feed him a spoiled chicken salad
#basically frenemy and i were in the same bio / chem / english class and we were friends bc we sat next to each other#and joked around and stuff#but also enemies (one sided . my side to be specific) bc he was an annoying ass white kid who was so tone deaf and idiotic sometimes#to elaborate he would just say casually racist shit to me and i would have to sit there and explain to him why that was wrong and he would#be like 'ohhhhhhhhhh. okay well i guess i get it 🫤 being woke is so hard sometimes 😣'#i wanted to push him down thr stairs sometimes but he used to share his notes with me so i didnt#anyway#we both had a mutual hatred for this other guy who was also in chem/bio/english with us#bc said guy was an insufferable fucking piece of shit#like openly racist homophobic transphobic like every ist and phobic possible basically#AND to top it off he had an inferiority complex and hated that the frenemy and i were constantly top of the class#so basically one day white boy frenemy and i got so sick of this dude that we were like#what if we traumatised him permanently thus altering the trajectory of his high school career#bc im smart and i didnt want to take the fall in case we got caught i got the frenemy to prepare rotting food prettily in a salad container#and we were about to give it to the guy the following day only to realise he was absent#so. yeah#to this day i hope that guy dies a painful death#z.post
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