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thoughtsbyharu · 8 months ago

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Guts and Guts (spilled) Album Thoughts

My thoughts about Olivia Rodrigo's 2nd album, Guts!

Hi everyone! Long time no post! A lot has happened for the past months and I haven't posted a lot :(

Anyway, so Olivia released an album last September! This review is sooo long overdue haha but at least I could also review the new songs released on Guts (spilled) which is kind of like the deluxe edition of Guts.

I am very excited for this album because her previous album, "Sour" was one of my favorites. I listened to this on its release and it did not disappoint! So let's talk about my thoughts about it.

1. all-american bitch

Rating: 9/10

Memorable line/s:

"I don't get angry when I'm pissed. I'm the eternal optimist, I scream inside to deal with it"

"I'm grateful all the time (Grateful every f*cking time)"

Thoughts:

Way to start an album! The song is very catchy and the pop rock elements just hits up my alley. I heard that she used some American pop culture references in this song so I did some researching to know the meaning of them (since I am not American lol).

The overall tone of this song is somewhat sarcastic. I think the song is about how people expect her to be the "perfect American woman" when some of that ideals are quite destructive. Take for example the line:

"All the time, I'm grateful all the time I'm sexy and I'm kind I'm pretty when I cry"

and the line

"I don't get angry when I'm pissed I'm the eternal optimist I scream inside to deal with like "Ah""

It's like even if you are upset or angry, as a woman, you are expected to be calm and mature and handle things gracefully like a proper lady. Basically, bottling up your feelings because you, having negative feelings and expressing them doesn't sit well with people.

These types of expectations are toxic and unhealthy. Keeping your thoughts internally because people will be inconvenienced is such bs. Having emotions isn't a crime because guess what, women are people too. We should be able to laugh when you're happy, cry when you're sad and get mad when you're angry.

Overall (before this section takes too long), I like the song and it's meaning. I especially love the outro. Oh! and have you guys seen her performance of this song on SNL? It was amazing!

2. bad idea right?

Rating: 8.5/10

Memorable line/s:

"Seeing you tonight is a bad idea right?"

"I only see him as a friend (The biggest lie I ever said)"

This is like hearing the thought process of your friend who can't leave their ex or move on 😂

It's a fun song and really catchy. I love the build up before every chorus hits. It's fun to sing along to.

It's funny because this song reminds me of one of my friends and his on/off relationship with a girl. Like, he keeps ranting about her but he just keeps coming back to her. Saying things like, "Well, we're still friends so we're still hanging out" but then regrets it later when stuff happens. This song reminds me soooo much of him. No matter how much advice we give him he always does the opposite.

Anyways, to my friend out there, hope you move on already!

3. vampire

Rating: 9/10

Memorable line/s:

"I used to think I was smart but you made look so naive"

"You can't love anyone, 'cause that would mean you had a heart"

So this song was said to be about a previous boyfriend but others said that this is about Taylor Swift, but I think I'd go with the former. I did some research and she did have a former boyfriend that fits the description so maybe it's about him?

The lyrics is kind of like "All Too Well" all over again. Not saying it's bad but it's really weird to think that a lot of young women can relate to it. I mean, why do these men always go after young women who's like, years their junior? The line "Went for me and not her, 'cause girls your age know better"?? Like dudes, why can't you find someone your age? Young women in their late teens to early 20s are still figuring out life, leave them alone 😂

Anyways, the song is quite good and pretty hard to sing so kudos to Olivia! I watched her live performances to this song and it's just so amazing.

4. lacy

Rating: 7.5/10

Memorable line/s:

"I see you everywhere, sweetest torture one could bear"

"People are people but it's like you're made of angel dust"

"I despise my rotten mind and how much it worships you"

This is definitely about envy. It's the kind of envy where you admire someone because you can never be like them. Do you guys get it? (haha)

She puts "lacy" in a pedestal because she's basically perfect; which is something that she (Olivia) thinks she could never be. Basically, "Lacy" brings out her insecurities and this is frustrating her.

I think most of us has their own "lacy". Maybe it's an idol, actress, friend, etc. and I get it because I also have my own. The thing is, you are your own person and that lacy is also their own person. You will never be them because you are you. It's alright to acknowledge the feeling of jealousy but don't let your life revolve around it. Do things that are best for you.

5. ballad of a homeschool girl

Rating: 8/10

Memorable line/s:

"I'm on the outside of the greatest inside joke"

"Each time I step outside, it's social suicide!"

This is not a ballad, this is an anthem!! 😂

I have to say, this ain't just for the homeschool girlies but awkward and socially inept people too (like me). I am laughing all throughout this song when I first listened to it because it is TOO relatable for my own good.

I love how chaotic it sounds, like a mind of a very confused and anxious girl who does not know how social stuff works.

P.S. can't find a fitting gif for this sooo bear with me

6. making the bed

Rating: 8/10

Memorable line/s:

"Well sometimes I feel like I don't wanna be where I am"

"Every good thing has turned into something I dread"

"I got the things I wanted, it's not what I imagined"

This is such a very personal and emotional song. I've been watching BoJack Horseman recently (I'm on Season 4 pls no spoilers) and this song reminds me of him. This song could be about her rise to fame but it could also be interpreted as facing the consequences of your own actions thus the title.

9. logical

Rating: 8/10

Memorable line/s:

"No, love is never logical"

"I know I'm half responsible and that makes me feel horrible"

"i fell for you like water falls from the february sky"

Another ballad~ It's about how she wished she left an unhealthy relationship sooner. She reminisced about how she ignored all the red flags because she loved him. This is probably about that guy on vampire because some lyrics talks about how he took advantage of her because she was young. And yes, when you are young, immature, and inexperienced, love is not logical. She seems to blame herself over it as well which made me want to give her a hug :(

The song makes me sad.

10. get him back!

Rating: 9.5/10

Memorable line/s:

"But I am my father's daughter, so maybe I could fix him"

"Wanna kiss his face, with an uppercut"

"I want sweet revenge, I want him again"

This feels like the continuation for "bad idea right?". Get him back is a song about having complicated feelings for an awful ex. She wants to get back with him but at the same time she wants to get revenge or get back at him for breaking her heart.

Song is very catchy and I hope I could hear this live soon! (Olivia please come to the Philippines) One of my faves in this album.

11. love is embarrassing

Rating: 9.5/10

Memorable line/s:

"My God, love's embarrassing as hell"

This is logical but in a lighter tone or when you are at the stage that you've moved on but you suddenly remember what you did and you get second hand embarrassment for yourself 🤣 It's giving "What the hell was I thinking, tf did I do that for??"

This song is so fun and I found myself singing it from time to time. One of my favesss

12. the grudge

Rating: 11/10

Memorable line/s:

"You took everything I loved and crushed it in between your fingers"

"My undying love, now I hold it like a grudge"

"I takes strength to forgive, but I don't feel strong"

"How could anybody do the things you did so easily?"

"It takes strength to forgive but, I'm not quite sure I'm there yet"

Ngl, this song made me cry. Every time I try singing it I always end up tearing up or crying. It's like you are trying to move on and forgive someone but that pain still lingers and it hurts so much and you can't bring yourself to come in terms with. To anyone who is in the situation, give yourself time because as they say time can heal all wounds. If you must cry, then there's no shame in crying.

13. pretty isn't pretty

Rating: 10/10

Memorable line/s:

"There's always something in the mirror that I think looks wrong"

"...I could try every every lipstick in every shade, but I'd always feel the same "

"You fix the things you hated, And you'd still feel so insecure"

Seriously Olivia. Why should you always write songs that are so personal and relatable?? I gotta be honest, but this song made me cry again haha. I dunno, I just can relate to this song soooo much. I love how Olivia wrote this because it captures the struggles of being an anxious and insecure individual. Anyway, on a lighter note, I love the guitar and the bridge of this song. This is one of my faves.

14. teenage dream

Rating: 10/10

Memorable line/s:

"When am I gonna stop being wise beyond my years and just start being wise?"

"They all say that it gets better, it gets better, but what if I don't?"

Another ballad and yes, I am crying because of this song yet again. If I have a song I want my teenage self to hear, it's this song. I am an eldest daughter in an Asian household so this song just pulls my heartstrings so much because it makes me feel heard and my feelings validated. I am expected of many things so this song comforts me.

The slow buildup to a rock tone during the outro is also such a nice tone.

15. obsessed

Rating: 10/10

Memorable line/s:

"You both have moved on, you don't even talk. But I can't help it, I got issues, I can't help it baby"

You don't know how guilty I felt when I heard this song for the first time hahaha. At one point in my life, I've been soooo insecure at my boyfriend's ex and the lyrics just hits me like a damn truck because my thoughts are exactly the same!! I mean, sometimes you just can't help to compare yourself from an ex you know?

I love the contrast of this vs. the other 3 songs because this is pop rock. I love the instrumentals for this!

16. girl i've always been

Rating: 8/10

Memorable line/s:

"And I can't say I'm a perfect ten. But I am the girl I've always been"

A country song! I love how lively this song is. The lyrics is kind of empowering in a way because it feels like Olivia has accepted that she is flawed and is not pretending to be that perfect girl anymore.

17. scared of my guitar

Rating: 7.5/10

Memorable line/s:

"I can't lie to it the same way that I lie to you"

"So we'll stay together 'cause how could I ever trade something that's good for what's right."

Another sad song (please Olivia I'll run out of tears!). I think Olivia is pertaining to her songwriting skills here and how she uses it to express her raw and authentic self. She compares how honest she is with her songwriting versus her relationship with others. It is implied that she isn't transparent about her feelings with other people, possibly because she is protecting herself.

18. stranger

Rating: 10/10

Memorable line/s:

"I cried a million rivers for you but that's over now. You're just a stranger I know everything about"

"You are the best thing that I'll ever keep so far out of my life"

"If I'm not enough for you, you're not enough for me"

This song is so uplifting and positive for someone who already moved on. I love the lyrics of this as it speaks about moving forward and forgiving someone but never forgetting. Oh! and I love the reference from "enough for you". I also love the guitar on this one.

19. so american

Rating: 9/10

Memorable line/s:

"He's like a poem I wish I wrote"

"Oh god, it's just not fair of him to make me feel this much"

"I'm probably gonna marry him if he keeps this shit up"

"I really love my bed but man it's hard to sleep when he's with me"

"I don't wanna assume this stuff. But ain't it love? I think I'm in love"

Guysss we finally have a love song!! This is such a perfect way to end an album together with "stranger" because it feels like a chapter has closed and another one has opened! This is her first love song since her debut right?? It's sooo good. The lyrics are so cute and makes me smile. She describes this guy as the best thing that's ever happen to her and that makes me happy somehow? She sounds sooo inlove and adorableee! I really love the bridge it makes me all giggly ><

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My Top 5 Picks:

stranger

the grudge

love is embarrassing

obsessed

pretty isn't pretty

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Overall Thoughts:

I gotta say, kudos to Olivia and her team because they manage to create another good album! It's great that they are consistent with pop rock and ballads and I especially appreciate that they added a little country touch on the song list!

Overall, like Sour, I love how this album is so personal. Ngl, this made me cry more than Sour ><

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jackredfieldwasmyjacob · 3 years ago

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Mapping Madrid: Week 2

This week I actually had some company; my friend who lives in Maastricht and his girlfriend were visiting the city, and so they agreed on going with me around Tribunal, the stop the roulette chose for me. It is on both lines 1 and 10, and it lies under Fuencarral Street, in the Universidad barrio (Central district). As you could imagine, it is a very frequented stop and I had been there a few times. Fuencarral Street is one of the main shopping streets of the city, and it is also close to the museums we visited; the Romanticism Museum (pics 1-3 and 7-8), an old noble house from the 19th century with paintings and other wares that depict how was the Romanticism era in Spain; and the Madrid History Museum (pics 4-6 and 9-10), a museum that depicts Madrid's history through paintings, maps, and other artifacts from the 16th century onwards with a really incredible baroque façade. I had already visited them once, but it had been a while and it was cool to rediscovered them!

#mappingmadrid #i'm so bummed that i can't follow the aesthetic i started with the first post with the metro station in the middle #the thing is i forgot to take the picture at the beginning and then we went to eat to a nearby place and we ended up going back through #a different station #also it was raining a lot and we only had one umbrella so it was a struggle™#but yeah it was nice meeting her she's very nice i like her #(she reminded me of my friend's ex which lol i guess he has a type)#also i spoke more english today than i think ever #at least since english classes in high school

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logicalbookthief · 2 years ago

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For the ask game:

May I ask 4, 13 and 27 for the owl house?

4. Do you have a NoTP in your fandom? Are they a popular OTP?

Alador & Darius. I know it has the ex-childhood friends to enemies to lovers angle, but for me, Alador’s rushed “redemption” didn’t really hit for me, and I still he’s a big too much of a subpar dad / dude to be paired with Darius.

HOWEVER I love to view them as enemies turned reluctantly civil PTA rivals because they still can’t stand each other but their kids are friends so they have to play nice for their sake and they hate every minute of it. It is way funnier to me.

13. Unpopular opinion about XXX character?

Idk how unpopular it is, but I feel with the exception of episodes like Any Sport in a Storm and Labyrinth Runners, Willow was sidelined way too much this season :(

Obviously, they were pressed for time with the cancellation, but I feel as if we never exactly got a satisfactory conclusion to her arc? Her conflict with Amity in the aforementioned episode was fine, I guess, though it never really hit on the emotional beats I wanted it to? The conflict was centered around Amity treating Willow like she wasn’t capable due to her own misguided need to protect her-- the problem is, this was established long already, as early as Willow’s debut in I Was a Teenage Abomination, or at least by Wing It Like Witches.

However, I think the bones of a better conflict were there. When Willow said Amity just needed to get to know the new her and Gus immediately corrected her, “You mean, the real you?” That, I wanted more of that! Because Willow was always capable! Even when she struggled with her spells as a kid, that didn’t make her any less capable than her peers! And Amity’s instinct to compensate and overprotect her, while it was with good intentions, reminds you how witches without magic/struggle with magic/use an “inferior” type of magic aren’t taken seriously, which was the case with Eda & Hunter & Gus at other points in this season.

And I also think back to Follies at the Coven Day Parade, where Amity was braiding Willow’s hair and lamented how they missed this, and Willow looks down, kind of pensive, kind of sad? To me that expression was always hard to read, mostly because we don’t get too much of Willow’s pov to decipher. In this case, I would choose to interpret it as Willow not really missing how their relationship used to be, since although she treasures her memories of Amity when they were kids and super close, she maybe doesn’t miss the dynamic of her being the screw-up who Amity had to bail out and look out for? So if Labyrinth Runners had built on that more, or if we had gotten more of Willow’s pov in general, I’d be happier with her arc this season.

Okay, lol. This got too long, onto the next question!

27. Least shippable character?

Philip Wittebane. Not because he’s the villain, in fact I love him as a villain, his backstory is marinating in my brain at all times. However, he is a Puritan. Who canonically gets no bitches and murdered his brother over getting bitches. I rest my case.

#asks #salty ask game #stripetkattelalala54

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erectionsandtea · 3 years ago

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Wow, this post is probably going to end up being a bad idea, because I am currently in the state of exhaustion that is telling me that this post is a good idea, lol

I'm p sure this will be pointless and unnecessary, though

The following post is an analysis, not of any ship or fandom specifically, but about me in relation to a certain ship in a certain fandom (Byler, ST). It's just a something to let my followers know a little bit more about me, and why I think the way I do, why I talk the way I do, in relation to the ship, and why I might try to avoid certain posts (theories, analyses, "proof" type things).

If you start to read this, please finish before interacting with me. I don't want anyone to take anything I write out of context.

Now, I don't know if this should be considered an anti-Byler post, because I'm not saying that I don't ship it...I guess it could be perceived that way, but it's not how I intend it to be. Bylers proceed with caution, as some of this may not be what you want to hear.

Also, I have been called out (for lack of better phrasing) for a possible trigger of calling a gay couple "just best friends" (Byler). The person who told me, said it was because they themselves had personally been in a situation exactly like that before. While I do not personally, fully know what that must be like (not having been in that situation myself, as I recall...), I CAN try to understand, and try to be more sensitive about that subject. So, I guess a trigger warning for...apparently internalized homophobia of calling a gay couple "just best friends" ???

I want to start by saying that I do not view Byler as canon (yet). That doesn't mean I don't think it can become canon, it doesn't mean that I don't ship it at all, because I do (to both of those).

Back when I initially didn't ship Byler at all, it was mostly because Mileven got in the way, lol, but the SECONDARY reason was that I saw a lot of myself and my friendships in them.

Yes, I was one of those people who thought that two same-sex people can be just friends (and I still am, but not specifically with Byler anymore).

I act the same way with my best friends, and I feel I would react the same way Mike did, if what happened to Will happened to one of my bffs. Basically, nothing about Byler specifically stood out to me as "gay". It just looked like a regular very-close friendship to me.

I was in drama and choir in high school. We changed in front of people, I had one friend who would grab my boobs on a daily basis, just because she could (it spawned from a running joke about how big my boobs are, in comparison to my tiny body). I've even seen some of my friends completely nude (and they have seen me). We've held hands. And while most, if not all of us, were somewhere on the rainbow spectrum (as I like to call it), all the things we did, we just did as friends and being friendly. Being queer wasn't exactly a big part of it.

Now, I'm not saying that all drama and choir kids will be the exact same as me. That's just how I ended up, and I think that's why I just see things differently (not saying I'm special by any means, everyone is different).

Anyway, Byler just didn't strike me as gay for each other. I AM of the opinion that Will is absolutely gay, lol, and I think Mike is definitely not straight (although I really don't see hard evidence for either, but I want it to be true). And I think there is absolutely potential for Byler, AND a likelihood for them to become canon.

I have read some Byler theories, and a lot of them make sense, and some pretty good points. Like how Mike keeps staring at Will's lips. On the one hand, I've done that to my friends, when I'm just staring off into space and happen to be looking at their lips, or their boobs, or whatever.

On the other hand, Mike was clearly not staring off into space, lol, he was focused.

But while the analyses and theories do make a lot of sense, that is just how I'm seeing them for now - theories, and analyses (which can neither be wrong nor right, usually). Until we get some hard, concrete proof, which, by my definition, is going to come either straight from the writer's/creator's mouths, or will show up in ST4, I do not consider anything I see from those theories as real proof or evidence.

I also know that it has been pointed out that the Duffers have put in certain details or, for ex., been very selective with certain music choices, or cinematography choices, etc. I totally see that. But you know, sometimes things in a book, movie, or show weren't meant to happen in the first place, and are just coincidences that we, the fans, take and just roll with (like the lip staring thing, for instance). I'm not necessarily saying that I believe everything the theories say are just coincidences (because I don't believe that at all, for some things), I'm just saying there are possibilities.

Another part of why I try to avoid analyses is honestly because I think they make so much sense, and the Mileven shipper in me wants Mileven to stay canon, but the analyses make so much sense that that shipper is afraid they might be right, lol. But that really doesn't have anything to do with this analysis.

I guess the point of this post is just to say that, I should be allowed to think that two same-sex people can be just friends, without being slandered and labeled as homophobic

(Because if you honestly think I am homophobic, I will link you to my Reddie fanfiction and all the other gay ships I ship which probably outnumber the straight ones, lol, I will refer you to my bisexual best friends and my bisexual father, I will even show you photos of myself marching in Pride parades. Plus, I will remind you that I am not at all straight myself.)

because not all same-sex relationships are gay, just like not all opposite-sex relationships are romantic.

THIS IS COMING FROM A BYLER SHIPPER. Just because I do not view them as canon right now doesn't mean that I don't think they will ever become canon. If they do become canon, the Byler shipper in me will be very happy! If they don't, that shipper in me will wish they had. Viewpoints can change. I guess it just takes more to persuade me. I like Byler, I just like Mileven a little bit more. That literally doesn't mean anything. It's nothing more than a preference.

So like, I guess I'm sorry that my life/my upbringing/my relationships and friendships have made me see things differently ?? I'm sorry that I didn't pick up on the same subtext as all of you ???

I'm probably coming off as a rude-ass bitch, but you were bound to find that out about me eventually.

P.S. I know that some of the homophobia comments are directed at shippers who are, very possibly, homophobic. But those comments do not apply to all of us, and we shouldn't be grouped up together just because we have ONE similar opinion (which isn't even based on the same reasoning).

I guess, if you can't accept and respect my opinion that, canonically, Byler is CURRENTLY just best friends (even though I do want them to be more), until we get proof from the source, we might not get along. I am willing to discuss the possibility, and even look at some theories occasionally, on why they might end up canon/together. But until then, it's only speculation to me, and I would appreciate it if I were not attacked for this (although I'm sure they will be).

I do not go around looking for people/posts just so I can tell them they are wrong, I respect everyone's opinion. I hope that the same can be done for me.

Thank you. <3

P.P.S. if this makes any of my Byler followers want to unfollow me, I understand (I will miss you, though)

#stranger things #I will not tag the ship in question as most shippers might not want to read this or will take it the wrong way #analysis #about me #I'm gonna take a nap now and will probably delete this later #this probably won't make any sense oh god

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ktheist · 5 years ago

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1 | friend in me.

“don’t confuse your party friends with your real friends.” (x)

muses. party friend!jungkook x reader ft. bestfriend!taehyung ft. ex-boyfriend!namjoon

genre. university au. fwb. f2l.

words. 6.1k

warnings. mentions of break up, mild exhibition, alcohol use, future mentions of joint, future smut, mature content

alternative title. to my dear friend.

final part. exclusives only (x)

note. this fic hasn’t been showing up in searches no matter how many times i repost and it’s got a special place in my heart so i really want it to reach the audience, that’s why i made a few changes in hopes to beat the odds lol. enjoy!

striking up an unlikely pact to look out for each other’s backs at parties, is the last thing you expect to do with jeon jungkook. sure, you may or may not find a reason to laugh at his lousy antics and corny pick up lines - he’s also a great kisser but that’s besides the point.

the point is, you’d like to keep him as that - the friend that you meet at parties and parties only. so when you see him on your campus grounds, naturally your first instinct is to stop, turn the opposite way you’re heading and where he’s coming from - and start fast-walking to the other end of the campus like the devil is after you.

except that devil comes in the form of denim jacket, white undershirt and wavy dark hair that easily falls over doe eyes that seem to sparkle when you freeze at the sound of your name and turn around to face him with an awkward smile.

he breaks into a mini jog, leaving his friends that you’ve never seen before, behind. your own friends who you’ve been walking with and ditched at the sight of him, gawping at you and the new face from the spot where you decided to leave them at.

why couldn’t they have gone on their merry way - regardless if you’d paused and trekked to the opposite direction you were heading to?

jungkook skids to a stop in front of you, pretty pink lips quirking after he tilted his head to shift his hair out of his eyes instead of pushing it back with his hands.

“hey,” he greets, glancing down at his scuffing vans before meeting your gaze again, the tip of his tongue running over his bottom lip before retreating back into his mouth, leaving a sheen of moistness on his lips, “i didn’t know you went here.”

willing yourself to smile, you push your hair to the back of your ear before wrapping your arms around your chest, “yeah,” you drag out with an awkward chuckle, not as oblivious as he is of the stolen glances coming from the people passing through the walkway.

“what are you doing here though?” you notice his own friends that he ditched waiting for him several feet away - a group of attractive men and women who clearly belong to the equally high place group from your own faculty.

and yet here he is, talking to you - the ghost with rounded glasses sitting atop her nose and faded chapsticks on her lips. out of all the days you could have looked more zombie-esque, jungkook had to show up at your faculty today.

he’s nice enough not to point it out though as his lips turn into an ‘o’ shape. if you focus, you’d probably see the light bulb going off in his head as the answer to your question hits him. though at this point, you’ve already been hit by your own realization of the reason for there being more people walking around with mechanical appendages and remote control of every kinds. it must be-

“we’re here for the robocup tournament,” he grins, excitement apparent in the way his eyes seem to widen as you can almost hear the screws in his brains working before the question tumbles out of his mouth-

“what about you? are you joining?”

you want to laugh.

and that’s the thing about jungkook - he’s so good at reading you that he knows something’s up. brows knitting together, “what’s... up?”

the shaking of your head is purely reactionary - you’ve made a few friends who came around to compete at times your faculty was the one to hosted it, like now. it’s not as serious as it seemed to be but it’s not entirely something you joke around either since it involved someone’s blood, sweat and tears to make the cut but-

“guess you haven’t heard about the long standing tradition of the circuit breaker’s string pulling. the competition’s rigged.” despite your too willing trip down memory land, you still let your eyes dart around in case anyone’s listening. after you’re sure no one was, only then do you finally go on, “every year, they pick a judge’s kid as part of the team - even if they weren’t enrolled in seollyu and were in some other non-robotics related university, they’ll get close to them and keep them around until the competition. one year, one of them even went as far as dating a judge’s daughter when they couldn’t recruit her into their team.”

swallowing down the bile, you pretend not to notice the complete downturn of his lips as you roll your shoulders in a shrug out of the need of having something to do that doesn’t require focusing on the conflicted, purse lipped frown on jungkook’s face.

“oh wow, we never heard anything like that in beongju.” he murmurs, eyes drawn to the grass a feet away as he contemplates.

“it’s okay, what matters is you guys have fun.” you wave a dismissive hand, smile more natural but still sporting its awkward tucks.

“yeah,” jungkook nods before he meets your gaze, smiling in a half-hearted attempt to ease his own mind, “who knows? maybe this year, beongju will come out victorious.”

you nod, chest blooming with hope - a wishful thinking perhaps, “maybe.”

it’s when his eyes twinkle with a different kind of excitement that you know the matter of the competition is past him, and that’s your cue to go.

“hey, are you-“

“i have a class to-

you both stop at the same time, staring at the other for the longest moment before jungkook offers for you to continue, “you first.”

“um,” you would have deflect it back to him out of politeness. that is, if you didn’t know that he was going to ask you if you were free. possibly to grab lunch or a smoothie somewhere. but that’s the thing, outside of parties, you’re a completely different person altogether. right now, you’re the all-work, no-play study-hard. none of your equally study hard friends are aware of how you are at parties - none of the people you know, know how you are at parties because you made sure to attend only those you’re sure you wouldn’t run into acquaintances. of course it’s difficult and there are a few familiar faces you can identify as people from your faculty at every party but barely which is a safe amount. so it doesn’t make sense to break the unspoken, mutual understanding of the core you and jungkook’s friendship is built on. he might have forgotten how important it was for you that you were strictly ‘fun’ friends, so it’s your job to remind him, “i have class right now.”

you take a step back in preparation to bolt towards said nonexistent on-going class, “but hey, good luck on robocup. oh yeah, what were you gonna tell me?”

jungkook’s “oh - uh,” shouldn’t have sent waves of relief to you the way it does, but when he mumbles a “nothing - it was nothing.” you couldn’t help but suppress a grateful sigh.

on any other occasion, with a person completely separate from jeon jungkook, you would have pressed on - encouraged them to say what they initially wanted to say. but instead, you shoot him a smile, “oh -okay. guess i’ll see you around?”

“uh,” it’s clear as day that he doesn’t want to just leave it up to chance to bump into you in this big building with at least a thousand occupants coming and going everyday throughout the competition but the way smacks his lips shut tells you he there’s something holding him back, so he settles with a, “yeah... see you around.”

“you know,” you pause, tendrils of reluctance forbidding you from relaying the tale of how you and jungkook met in hopes it was indicative enough but judging from the way jisoo has her eyebrows raised, lisa with her knowing smile, taehyung and jimin expectantly waiting but with the first actually shooting you an meaningful stare - it seems like you have no choice but to say it-

“we spoke a few times at different parties and realize we have the same party mutual and get invited to the same parties so... we decided to hang together... at parties.”

“hang,” lisa echoes, underlying tone couldn’t have been more obvious as she grins from ear to ear.

“please, no way in hell do you just hang with jeon fucking jungkook when there’s booze and a dozen of empty rooms involved.” jisoo comes barreling through like a bulldozer, hands in the air as she squeals at whatever scenario her mind is cooking up in her head.

laughter trickles out of your mouth as you hide your face in your palms in an attempt to avoid jisoo and lisa’s eyes and the things that they’re hinting at with a mere gaze.

“why?” taehyung’s baritone finally hits the air as he leans back against the recliner. once the silence settles in a second later and all eyes turn his way, he adds, “not that it’s any of our business but,” he shrugs, “he’s not really your crowd - not any of our crowd.”

that’s the million dollar question. taehyung hates beers and crowded places - which is a surprise given his social butterfly-ness among all five of you. jimin, jisoo and lisa do go parties - those that your closest friends would be at. otherwise, they aren’t adventurous as you.

maybe jimin has a another side that you don’t know - it’s a known fact that he has other friends. dance friends, drinking friends, and whatever type of people with similar interests who flock a certain direction.

just like how you had jungkook and the group of friends you hung out with at parties.

“i mean, my dance friends aren’t exactly your kind of crowd either,” jimin interjects from the floor, head lulled to the back to look at taehyung, “remember how you wanted to avoid hoseok at all costs after i brought you to a practice once?”

“yeah,” you instantly second, hand gesturing to the man in a ‘exactly what he said’ manner before turning to the taller guy, “everyone makes friends where their usual friends aren’t.”

“i guess,” he cedes after what felt like the longest pause in your history of friendship.

it is that moment, just as your muscles begin to relax, that your phone dings with a notification. unbeknownst to you that you still command the attention in the entire room, you cluelessly let check out the new text message.

koo: we lost ):

“it’s him.” lisa announces, the bed shaking as she scoots away when you try to swat her thigh.

“and she has him saved as koo,” she - without any trace of intentionally constructed pun, coos, hands clasped together next to her tilted head as she bumps it with jisoo who’s mimicking her gestures.

“he just texted to say he lost,” you clarify, shaking your head at the two girls’ antics.

not that it changes anything as jisoo leans her whole body against lisa, an arm on her forehead in a troubled manner, “now i wish i had a boyfriend.”

lisa hums in agreement, her long limbs extending to wrap around the older girl’s torso as she rests her chin on top of jisoo’s dark brown tresses.“me too, sweetie. me too.”

typing out a ‘i’m so sorry. it’s okay they don’t deserve your talent anyway ):’ with a mixture of emojis, you hit send just before turning to what jimin is saying.

“...go to one. i heard alpha sig is having one tomorrow,” then he turns to you, as though you bear an abundance of knowledge about which place is having a party and on what day, “right ____?”

it takes you a moment to piece together what he said. you didn’t hear the beginning but you’re sure it’s something along the lines of jimin setting the two lonely singles to break their 2 month no-party streak and maybe get that boyfriend they wanted.

“jimin, i’m not sure,” you say shortly before turning to the two girls,“not that that many good, upstanding citizen of men go to the parties i went to though but maybe there’s a miracle waiting for you girls,” you smile in genuine hopefulness while referring to an entirely hopeless place. but it turns into an emphatic one as the two girls fake cry about the minimal chance they have to get a - in what you could make out of jisoo’s fake bawling - hot, sexy party boyfriend. whatever that meant.

you don’t have the time to confirm it when your phone dings again.

koo: thanks i can always count on you to be real w me 🥺🥰

another grey bubble pops pushes the text you’re reading upwards.

koo: you coming to alpha sig’s party?

koo: we have to be here for the closing ceremony tmr anyway

koo: help me make good memories before i leave seollyu 🥺

you suppress the urge to roll your eyes at that. he’s only been here for one day and he got invited to one of the most hard-to-get-in parties on the campus.

naturally, you and jimin were invited from your underlying reputations. and naturally, whoever you bring is invited too.

except you’re not a fan of going to parties that you know you’d meet the exact people you didn’t want to meet.

lisa peeks at your phone the second time - and you didn’t even notice until she screams, “___’s going to alpha sig’s!”

“oh my god, will he be there?” jisoo leans her entire body over lisa in a reckless abandon to get a peek of what the younger one saw only to have you hold your phone away.

“um? privacy? anyone?” you offer while jisoo pouts.

“duh, she’s going because of him.” lisa says im a matter-of-factly, “otherwise, she wouldn’t even entertain the thought of going to any party infested with people we already had to see sober.”

“am not.” you counter, the matter of replying already long forgotten as you cross your arms over your chest, phone tucked in between the side of your boob and hand, “if i’m going, it’d be because i want to!”

“so you’re going?” jisoo blinks, eyes twinkling with hope. so are lisa’s.

you have no choice but to turn your cheek to a laughing park jimin on the floor. his pupils disappearing behind his lids. clearly, he’s not going to back you up. so you turn to the only other person who you thought would.

“if tae’s going then i’ll go,” you declare, already feeling the triumph of what the man would choose from his precedent choices. “not that you guys need me to get in since jimin’s already-“

“sure.” the taller man announces.

you’re forced to make a double take while your jaw drops in your lap along with jisoo and lisa’s while jimin blinks in surprise from your periphery.

completely conscious of the gazes boring into his skull, taehyung attempts to casually shrug it off as a- “since you guys are going, you know.”

jisoo yelps in celebration before going “great, who’s up for some chicken?” shooting up and sending the mattress shaking as she takes big steps over your legs and hops off the bed. hands planted on her hips, she glances around the room with the residue of a pleased smile from the decision of all five of you finally going to a party together.

“me!” lisa follows suit with the exception that she’s crawling on her hands and knees to get off the bed.

“me but i don’t want to get up.” jimin whines, unmoving from his spot which is lying on the fluffed pink carpet as taehyung’s birthday present to his otherwise creme themed room.

“come on, park. get your ass off the floor and to the parking lot - get it, park jimin goes to the parking lot?” jisoo begins tugging on his wrist, the sight rather comical considering how she’s trying to make a man twice her size sit up, let alone move to get to the car seeing as he’s the only one with one.

lisa shares a doubtful look with you and taehyung at the poorly made pun, questioning why jimin seems to be the only one chuckling but then again, he’s always been the easiest to entertain.

after huffing and puffing, jisoo finally plucks the boy off the floor. but getting him to walk the distance from his apartment to the car is another feat.

it’s when their voices echo in the hallway, and you and a certain taller man is left in the room, do you notice the difference in this silence compared to the rest as he pushes himself up.

“are you going for real?” you finally ask, throwing your feet over the bed.

taehyung’s lips pucker as he contemplates the pros and cons, “what’ll i do if i don’t go? binge watch maze runner and be reminded of the fact that all third movies suck?”

maybe he doesn’t hate parties as much as you initially thought. after all, it’s been a year since he vomited all over kim sowon while making out on the couch at alpha sig’s.

you grin, elbowing the man as you both make your way out of the room, “hey, maybe you could find yourself a girlfriend while you’re at it.”

taehyung’s laugh doesn’t reach his eyes but you chalk it up with the jitters of the thought of having alcohol course through his veins and surrounded by bodies on the dance floor, “huh, yeah.”

the day fly by between getting to classes and getting lunch - it was a feat to convince everyone to go to dumpling place just a little bit off campus but you’d managed and subsequently successfully avoided running into jungkook for the day.

“bih, what the fuck?” lisa gawks, jaw descended to the ground as she stares at your mini black crop top that stops a few inches above your high-waist ripped jeans.

if you didn’t show up to classes in sweats and oversized sweaters, round glasses and hair always up in your laziness to make them look presentable - every day, maybe your ability to throw on some eye make up and highlights over your foundation wouldn’t have been so much as a surprise.

unlike you, your friends have always been on top of their game when it comes to appearing like functioning members of society. the clothes they have now have also been worn to class before - that’s how you know their confidence is sky high while yours require a little bit of help depending on what you wear.

why they decided to adopt a munchkin like you into their otherwise perfect clique, you’ll never know - but maybe it had something to do with you looking like a lost puppy in your first year with your round glasses and the thick books you carry around. it was a matter of time you ran into someone and drop them - that someone being jisoo.

after that, the rest was history - your prejudices towards groups of attractive people have never been so diminished.

your hair bounces gently as you hop into the passenger seat, giggling shyly at the attention you’ve garnered with your otherwise usual getup for a fun time.

“if i knew you won’t have any problems surviving off skinny jeans and cute tops, i would have burned those baggy clothes a long time ago.” jisoo confesses, red lips curled into an impressed ‘o’ as she takes in your appearance.

you gasp, truly offended to know your day-to-day choice of outfit has never been any of your friend’s preference yet only now do they make it known - talk about fake friends! “don’t you insult my comfy clothes like that!”

a light bump on her shoulder forces her to tear her gaze away and turn her cheek to the grinning girl next to her, “maybe she has a reason to dress cute.”

and just like that, the two breaks out into coos. sending you signals with their entire face muscles as jimin chuckles from the driver’s seat.

“but you know, this is how ___ usually dress up for parties even like before she met jungkook.”

you send praises to the gods for sending you this blessing of a friend as you fix the two girls a smirk, posing like a model as much as the cramped space allows you, “nah, i got it from my momma.”

an onslaught of protest - denials - mixed with cheers erupt as you begin to poorly mimic that of models with your limbs pointing in every direction and body bending in weird angles. it doesn’t take long before laughter tumbles out of everyone’s mouth, the front seaters included - taehyung had achingly turned in his seat to attend your fashion show while jimin stole glances in the rearview mirror.

yoo jeongyeon is the first to wave you over. if there’s a grey area where party friends and real friends merge together, it’ll be her. you’ve gone to parties together and had fun - though the last time you did, you ended up waking up on the same bed with some guy on the floor.

jin? jun? jeong? j-something grinned when he woke up to the sight of you two, “so... can i get you girls’ number?”

jeongyeon didn’t bother to hold back her grimace and you’d strutted into the bathroom as if you didn’t hear him.

“kim taehyung, lisa manoban and kim jisoo.” she studies each one with an impressed, “how did jimin and ____ manage to haul your asses out and over here?’

“the single life they’ve been walking has finally slapped them in the face and they finally want-“ you get cut off by lisa’s fake chuckle that sounds every bit forced.

“-wasted.”

“-boyfriends!”

they end up saying at the same time. while jisoo is finds no fault in her confession, lisa’s face is heating up - coming second next to you when it comes to shying back into her shell when topics like these come to light.

“taehyung too.” jisoo hooks her hand around the aforementioned man’s arm, stopping him from slowly disappearing into the crowd like a certain park jimin has, her other one around younger girl.

“jeongyeon, you have introduce us to cute guys or we’ll end up dying from all this single-ness!”

at that, the woman burst into laughter, hand on her stomach as she tries and fails to suppress it.

“i don’t know,” she wipes a tear from the corner of her eyes, “isn’t that more of ____’s specialty?”

“uh,” it takes a heartbeat for you to register what jeongyeon is saying before the same heart in your chest crashes against the ground at her next words.

“everyone knows,” a meaningful smile quirks on her lips, “about you and-“

“i- uh, i think i heard jackson calling me - something about a group project.” you quickly say, cursing yourself for the less than plausible excuse to get away.

and the three girls think so too as they call you out for it but you don’t stop until they’re out of earshot and out of the spotlight, ending up at a table full of booze.

you pop a can open, letting the bitter taste wash over your suddenly dry throat. the alcohol hasn’t got to you yet but you know it will and maybe that’s the only thing you have going on as you walk around, waving to people you know and lingering to talk with some, noticing that most of them are halfway to getting drunk.

some time later, you spot jisoo, lisa and jeongyeon dancing with some of your close friends. beer in their hands. you wonder how they’re going to find a boyfriend or even a hook up if they just keep to their circle - that was the clear as day distinction between you and them.

where they feel the most comfortable surrounded with familiar faces - regardless of whether they like them - you find comfort on a room full of strangers and the knowledge that you wouldn’t see them anymore after that.

but that wasn’t the case for jungkook. after one too many parties and several ‘hey, i was hoping i’d see you’s, a sense of camaraderie starts forming. of course, rules don’t apply where it would in a normal, socially sober setting.

you were friends as much as you were fucking like rabbits. finding comfort in mornings where you wake up without a sense of recollection, a throbbing headache and a lump of body underneath the sheets only to sigh in relief upon finding out who it was as though to say ‘oh thank god it’s you and not some rando i won’t know how to politely kick out while emphasizing that i have class in like 5.’

you embark on a visual searching journey to look for the same boy who wouldn’t mind if you had to shut the door in his half-awake face on mornings you had to get ready for class and still smiled at you later that night when you meet at a different party - until your gaze lands on a pair of brown eyes.

instead of wide and doe-like, the one that captured yours are hooded and heavy, boring into the windows of your soul. all of a sudden, you’re brought back to the same time last year. back when you were just a freshie with a stomach full of butterflies as you shyly look away from those piercing eyes.

but now, all you feel is your stomach rearranging and bile almost rising to your throat as you take a swig of the beer before melding into the crowd.

alpha sig is known for their closeness with circuit breaker, having been been sponsored by your own faculty for those with outstanding achievements to stay on-campus.

but none of the circuit breakers ever come to these parties - or at least, he never did.

almost as though the stars and planets aligned to manifest your only thought, a familiar voice wraps around the syllables of your name. and you would have continued on your merry way and pretend like you didn’t hear anything, if only you’re not in a hallway where there’s least people and subdued music compared to the dance floor you just escaped from.

“i heard you’ve been around,” kim namjoon stands at the end of the hallway, decked in plain gray t-shirt underneath a leather jacket and black pants. he takes easy, casual steps towards you with a dimpled smile that couldn’t have been more vain, “but i couldn’t believe my ears,” his shoulder line jolts as he shrugs, “well, until now, at least.”

“who would’ve thought? the cute ___ who blushed from a simple peck would have this side to her.” he stands a good half a head over you, his cologne’s changed from the last time you’d come in such a close proximity like you are now.

“yeah,” you drag out in a half-singing voice, face schooled into an unfazed expression, “i mean, it’s better than going around tricking girls into sleeping with you, right?”

at that, his smile instantly drops into a hard set frown as he lowers his voice, “i didn’t ‘trick’ you into having sex with me,” his lips quirk up at possibly a recollection of that night, “as i recall, you begged me to take your virginity.”

“that was before i knew your shitty motives to get brownie points from my dad just so you could win a stupid competition,” your voice is equally low and threatening, body heating up from the remembrance of those unreplied texts and the look in his eyes when you approached him that monday after the tournament - like he didn’t even know you.

namjoon laughs - the sound dripping with mockery as he throws his head back slightly, “come on, that was like a year ago. get over it.”

that’s it.

that’s when your mind is the clearest. no amount of beer could tell you otherwise - that this man right here doesn’t deserve the benefit of the doubt on the occasions that your friends begin spilling hot tea about the leader of circuit breaker and the things the members have done to win. they didn’t know about you and namjoon - nobody really does. you should have known those late night meetings and nothing but a polite smile when you pass in the hallways - were all red flags.

ones that you willfully ignore in the guise of ‘i’m not ready to tell everyone yet’s and ‘it doesn’t matter, if nobody knows, right? as long as i know you’re my girl’s

“you’re a dick.”

you push past him, cursing internally when he doesn’t budge and you’re the one who ends up with an almost dislocated shoulder.

it is only when you’re pushing a through the sea of bodies and swatting hands that try to grope your ass, does a certain doe-eyed, bunny smile enter your vision.

almost instantly, the urge to pinch the hand on your lower back disappears after knowing who its owner is. you’re pressed up against each other - the dance floor doesn’t allow much room for personal space and you’ve shared your personal spaces with each other far too many times to need that kind of distance from each other.

“i was looking for you,” the alcohol in his breath doesn’t feel all that repugnant as he nears his mouth to the shell of your ear, igniting a fire that kim namjoon had set up with the previous exchange.

he stands straighter, lips puckered sulkily as he swayed your bodies together, “we lost and everyone in my team had girlfriends or boyfriends to comfort them-”

your hands that cup his face and digs into his messy tresses make him clamp his mouth shut. the gentlest protrusion of his adam’s apple bobbing as he swallows in anticipation.

he asked and you shall grant it.

girlfriend. fuck buddy. what difference does it make?

“i know, koo. i’m sorry you wasted your time on that dumb competition.” you purr, noticing how his gaze becomes glazed as he steals a glance at your lips before meeting your eyes again.

a heartbeat later, you’re pressing your mouth against the softest pair of lips you’ve ever known. mentally, you make a note to ask what he uses to keep them smooth and kissable.

he snaps out of his stupor a moment later, hands snaking down to grab your ass like he’s done this a million times before and knows just how to get you moaning into his mouth. almost as natural as breathing, he slips his tongue past your lips tasting you.

another moan escapes you when he begins kissing down your chin, trailing sloppy kisses on your neck and suckling on the one spot that gets your heart palpitating on your chest. hands tucking on his pleated outer shirt for the sake of having something to hold.

you bring jungkook’s face to yours, noticing the sheen on his pinker lips before pressing another deep kiss. he doesn’t to think twice to react. one hand on your free hand slipping underneath your crop top. when someone shove into jungkook, almost sending you tumbling backwards and ending up doing the same to another person - jungkook curses. “fucking drunktards.”

a giggle escapes your lips, “pot calling the kettle black? we were probably bumping into people on nights we were shit faced drunk.”

“probably.” he shrugs, fingers lacing around your wrist as he guides you off the dance floor and into the kitchen where he doesn’t waste a second in hoisting you up onto the counter and slips in the space between your legs.

“hello.” you murmur, resting your forehead against his, cheeks hot and body aflame.

“hey, beautiful.” he fixes you a lazy grin, lips drawing closer to your mouth but before he manages to close the hair breadth’s distance, he stops.

“wait.” he murmurs against your lips, eyes glued to them as though he’s picturing another part of him on them.

“what?” you whisper, just as enticed by his own lips as your try to pull him closer with your arms that’s wrapped around his neck.

“are you drunk?” are his next words and you’re well aware the basis of where it spurred on.

once upon several parties ago, you’d included stopping you from putting on a risque show if your drunken self ever abandoned your self-restraint. jungkook, on the other hand, doesn’t love attention per se but he doesn’t shy away from it either.

“i’m not,” you assure, drawing closer to his lips by the second like moth drawn to flames. but you have enough sense to tilt your head to steal a glance towards the direction where you’ve been feeling a hole being drilled into your skull. your heart skips a beat when you catch namjoon’s eyes - he’s leaning against the wall with his friends either standing or sitting on the couch, beer in one hand.

“but i need your help to make someone jealous.”

jungkook follows your gaze towards namjoon and his friends a few feet away. it doesn’t take much for him to piece two and two together - especially after your a apparent animosity while telling him about the competition being rigged.

“ah,” he hums - you could just hear the smile in his voice. your knees weaken at the touch as you begin kissing the patch of skin closest to your lips which is his jawline. “i don’t know if i should be sad or happy that you’re finally agreeing to have sex in public with me because of some what’s-his-face guy.”

“not have sex sex,” you correct, delight filling your chest when he shivers - whether it’s from your touch of the image your words are painting in his head, you’re not sure, “but make out with me like you’re a kiss away from fucking me senseless?”

“i thought that’s a given?”

not needing to be told twice, you find yourself being devoured like a little rabbit in the arms of the beast. the background around you blurs together as you inhale jungkook’s scent, feel the warmth seep from his body to yours. your hand snakes down in between your bodies with one goal in mind: the gentle protrusion brushing against your own crotch.

“fuck a show,” jungkook hisses harshly against your mouth, breathing becoming labored as you caress him over the layer of his jeans, “where’s the closest room we can get to?”

you nod in agreement, hopping off the counter and tugging on your top to keep your nipples from being exposed after jungkook’s hand fall away from your breast at your retreat.

“they might have empty ones upstairs.” you tug on jungkook’s hand, making your way to the staircase and trying not to step over drunken bodies making out on the ground or simply passed out.

it’s when you get one foot on the stairs, that a clamoring thud erupts from somewhere on the dance floor - the air that was once blaring now pin drop silent. jungkook’s cheek presses against your back as he wraps his arm around your torso, a peck landing on your shoulder, not telling you to move but not really interested at the reason you paused to peer through the gaps of bodies that seemed to be looking at something just around the corner.

“shut the fuck up, dickhead!” a voice thunders against the walls after another thud that sounded like heavy equipment falling against the ground - and possibly breaking.

“must be those football guys fighting over a girl.” jungkook comments, uninterested.

on any other occasion, you would have agreed and gone on your merry way but it’s the unsettlingly familiar baritone that made you freeze in your spot in the first place. it’s with a rattling realization and the sight of jisoo among the throng of people, calling out “taehyung, leave it!” that gets you to trudge back to the floor, vaguely aware of jungkook trailing from behind with a “what’s wrong?”

eyes bore into your skull as you finally push through the throng of people and burst onto the scene. jisoo has her arms around taehyung’s while jimin appear miniature as he stands between the taller man and an unnervingly calm namjoon. the latter wipes a trace of blood from his busted lower lip as chills run down your spine when the man’s eyes falls on you, lips curving into a vain smile.

“why don’t you ask her yourself?” his voice drums against the walls - loud and clear to those who are watching which is basically everyone here.

“come on, ___, everyone wants to know if you begged me to be your first and how we fucked in the back room of the student lounge.”

#bts smut #jungkook smut #bts scenarios #jungkook scenarios #bts fic #bts fanfiction #jungkook fic #jungkook fanfiction #jungkook #bts #bts x reader #jungkook x reader #bts imagines #jungkook imagines

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defilerwyrm · 3 years ago

Note

For the ask meme: burning bright, anything about the parts at the table with the Nein. You write their banter so well!

FIC SPOILERS BELOW!

Burning Bright on AO3

The entire dinner scene hit me like a bolt of lightning while I was working on this fic. It started with Beau’s outburst, and then Veth’s willful denial and subsequent fit, and I built the two scenes around that.

Diving into particulars….

“Uhm,” he said, intelligently, but quickly recovered and flashed his friends a smile. “It is most impressive. Certainly a step up from a tiny hut.”

A direct reference to the name of the spell. Originally it was Leomund’s tiny hut. I have no clue why in 5e Wizards decided to 86 the attribution names on so many spells like Otiluke’s resilient sphere and Tasha’s hideous laughter. Things like that always made me curious about the (what I assume were) PCs the spells were named after. I had thought maybe it was because the characters who diegetically invented them were specific to one setting, but in that case I don’t know why Bigby’s hand is still Bigby’s but Evard’s black tentacles are no longer Evard’s. I don’t like it. As an aside, Widowgast’s Nascent Nein-Sided Tower is, mechanically speaking, Mordenkainen’s Magnificent Mansion. Anyway. Moving on!

It was delectable that Caleb wanted to impress him.

This boy hungry and not just for soup

Flustered, Essek tried to fend them off, but it was Caleb that did him in. It was always Caleb. The human took a large roll from his own plate, broke it in half, and offered one of these parts to Essek, who tried his best not to choke.

“You need to keep your strength up, ja?” Caleb implored him quietly.

The steady hand that accepted was a point of pride because it very much wanted to quake. The Kryn weren’t bread people, but...did he have any idea what this gesture would mean in Rosohna? Any inkling at all?

This is another one of those places where I delight in playing to cultural differences. What I’d had in mind for what that gesture—breaking food into two pieces and offering half to someone—WOULD mean in Rosohna was a bit nebulous, as I like to keep the reader guessing a bit and let their imagination fill in the blanks; but my rough idea was that it’s a courting gesture that signifies “I can and will provide for you, even if it means less for me.” An expression of selfless caregiving and an offer of partnership. Not wholly unlike a bird bringing food to a prospective mate.

And actually it’s a little bit funny coming from Caleb, who has fuck-all to his name but his name, when Essek is a rich bitch who answers directly to the Bright Queen.

Not that he was about to say it out loud, but he was a quick convert to this whole bread thing. To say that it won him over would be an understatement. That seemed to be a recurring theme here.

I imagine if I’d grown up never really eating bread and was introduced to it in adulthood I’d be like “Where have you BEEN all my life?!” But also: the bread is friendship, the bread is the Mighty Nein, the bread is communion in the spirit of sharing rather than politics and appearances and power plays—things he thought he was fine without until they were foisted upon him.

Somewhere in the course of the multiple conversations going on at one time, Jester got an Idea, as she was prone to doing. He became increasingly aware of her talking about kissing, of all things, and this culminated in her shouting above the din, cheeks flushed purple though he hadn’t seen her touch any wine: “I have an idea you guys! Why don’t we all go around and say how many people we’ve kissed?”

Jester is the most wonderfully convenient deus ex machina if you ever need to insert an awkward or embarrassing conversation among the Mighty Nein, because this is exactly the sort of shit she would do.

Jester leaped up and slammed her hands onto the table. “Caduceus you’ve never been kissed?! That’s so sad!”

The firbolg was unfazed. He merely shrugged and said, “It hasn’t come up and I haven’t gone looking. Not something I’ve ever thought about, really.”

Jester’s tail lashed back and forth behind her like an overstimulated cat. “Do you want me to kiss you?”

Fjord went a bit wild-eyed at this. Caduceus smiled gently and said, “No thank you.”

Three things about this part:

1) Jester’s tail doesn’t get NEARLY enough mention in fic! If I’m playing (or writing) a character with a tail you can be damn sure you’re gonna know what it’s doing! Makes me wanna play a tabaxi tbqh.

2) Cad’s “No thank you” is the sum total of his sexuality, lol. Jester was raised in a pretty highly sexualized setting, didn’t really get out much before she fled Nicodranas, and can be pretty naïve, so she doesn’t really get the whole aroace thing; but it never crosses Cad’s mind that this would be “abnormal“ or ”sad” in any way—it causes him no distress, as it shouldn’t. This is yet another “Same planet, different worlds” moment.

3) Fjord is physically restraining himself from yelling “JESTER WHAT THE FUCK” lmao

Veth kept picking at it. “So you’re um. You know. Into the fellas?”

Beau snorted. “I could’a told you that months ago.”

“Yeah you could’a!” Veth pouted with a self-conscious curl to her shoulders.

I saw a comment on Tiktok that said Veth was being borderline homophobic, but that wasn’t my intent! It’s just that she inherited a certain blind spot for male queerness from her player, and as hard as she’d been trying to encourage Caleb to hook back up with his female ex, it never occurred to her that he had a male ex, too—and given that they’ve been so close for so long, she’s feeling pretty self-conscious about the fact that she never figured out that Caleb is bisexual in all that time, as well as kind of upset that no one—Caleb especially—told her. She’s having a moment of “Why didn’t I know this? Did you think it was going to change things between us? Did I make you feel unsafe?” And also a little bit of “Okay well, now I have to get him to hook up with TWO people AT ONCE because my boy deserves threesomes 😤”

Jester went goggle-eyed at him. “You’ve only been with one person?” she exclaimed. “But you’re like a hundred years old! And very handsome. I would have thought you’d get like, all the ladies.”

Ladies. Right.

Veth might not be the only one with a certain blind spot.

Beau gave her a funny look, snorting. “I dunno, he seems like the kinda guy who turns down those offers left and right.”

..…But Beau’s got his number, for more than one reason. She’s got super gaydar, for one, and has him pegged as the type who’s very choosy about his partners (also mind you, this was before demi!Essek was canonized by WoG, so I was still rolling with my hc that Essek got around when he felt like it).

The uproar was instantaneous. Everyone—almost everyone—started talking or shouting at once. Beau’s voice rang out among the din with, “HOLY SHIT ESSEK FUCKS.” Strangely pleased with himself, he downed the rest of his wine in one gulp and spent the next few minutes fending off increasingly prying, personal questions until the Nein grew bored with his lack of answers and someone changed the subject.

There it is, the line that spawned two entire scenes!

He was not a war mage, but he was experienced and wily, and he was damned good at what he did, and as long as there was breath left in his body, the Mighty Nein would not fall here.

Joke’s on me, motherfucker literally has the War Caster feat -_-

But like in my defense, that’s just what it’s called in the book. The feat just means that you have either the training or experience to cast well during a fight, which I see as not necessarily the same thing as a war mage, which was my way of saying an arcane caster who is a soldier.

Veth stared at her blankly as if willing herself not to understand. “Caleb? With who?”

She breathed steadily. “...Essek. Caleb and Essek.”

Beside her, Jester squealed and brought her fists to her face.

Veth was less enthused. “WHAT.”

Beau’s mental commentary here is dead on. Veth still doesn’t really trust Essek at this point and has been pretty vocal about that…despite being the one to declare him part of the Mighty Nein? Eh, she’s allowed to have complicated feelings on the guy, all things considered. But I find it kind of comical and very Veth (and very Sam) for her to be all full of zest for trying to get Caleb back together with the frigging Volstrucker who is actively working for his abuser and worst enemy but balk at him hooking up with Essek.

Jester “explained” in a delighted yell: “Caleb and Essek are gonna fuuuuuuck!”

I don’t know, is this too unsubtle to call foreshadowing? The line flowed naturally in the dialogue, but it’s also letting the reader know exactly what they’re in for next, lol.

“...He’s going to break that little elf twink, you know,” Veth said, sounding distant. Seemed she was having some difficulty processing. Not too surprising, considering how adamant she was about wanting their wizard to hook back up with his old flame, the fucking Volstrucker. “We’ve all seen his dick.”

This was 100% taken from Sam’s little throwaway line “It’s above-average” but it turned out to serve two purposes other than reminding the reader that all of these people have seen Caleb naked:

1) It’s yet another thing Veth thinks she understands about him but doesn’t. Caleb’s a top like Dalmatians are purple and if you disagree then I respect your right to be incorrect ;)

2) That said, it is, in fact, foreshadowing for the sequel, in which Essek experiences a great deal of frustration. (I haven’t touched the damn thing in weeks, feels like; I’ve been too busy with work, being exhausted from work, and being in a tizzy about my upcoming surgery.)

Fjord blurted out, “I’ll join you.”

Poor Fjord has had such an uncomfortable night!

Hoo boy that was a lot. Thanks for the ask, this was really fun!! And sorry it took so long; I work Saturday nights and things got really busy for a bit there.

#shadowgast #ask box games #before long my song is dying #critical role #plz how do i fandom

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captainreecejames · 4 years ago

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here is the first part to Win a Date with an English Premier League Player! - Winners are Released.

author’s note: this is gonna be a short series, i’m not really sure how many parts its gonna be but I’m going to guess around five or six. as i’ve said before, this is a trope from win a date with tad hamilton, but it’s still my story. i’ve tried to make the reader (which is a female) as neutral as possible, with no physical description so that it fits everyone. If I haven’t done that and you spot something, please tell me and I’ll fix it!

warnings: definitely some language in here and the reader’s first relationship is unhealthy, so be wary of that

word count: 1.6k

part two

“What the hell is this?” Troy asked Y/N, shoving her phone in her face as she tried to get ready for their date.

“What the hell is what?” she asked back, not even trying to read the screen that was two inches from her face.

“This voicemail!” Her blank look only irritated him more. “You’ve won a date with Christian Pulisic! When the fuck did you sign up for a date with that sad footballer?”

“I didn’t,” she answered plainly, going back to applying the mascara on her eyelashes. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

As Y/N finished speaking, the flat door slammed closed and Erin, her best friend, announced her presence. “Babe! Where are you?”

“Bathroom!” Y/N called back, ignoring the look sent by her boyfriend.

“So I did something,” she started as she walked towards the couple. Y/N could tell her friend was guilty by the way her tone and she looked towards the door, waiting for her to appear.

“Does it have anything to do with this voicemail that Y/N just received?” Troy looked down at her, a stern look in his eyes that Erin didn’t back away from.

“Hello Troy,” a drawl in her voice which Y/N recognized. Erin’s dislike for Troy began when Y/N started dating him and it only grew with every break up the two went through. “Didn’t know you’d be here.”

“It’s date night,” Y/N answered, a pointed look at her best friend. She mouthed an oops as Troy rolled his eyes, picking up his phone to answer a call.

“Go for Troy,” he said walking away, Erin mocking him to Y/N’s face. She stifled a laugh, turning back to the mirror to inspect the makeup on her face, making sure there were no smudges.

“So, does whatever you did happen to be related to this voicemail I have yet to listen to that claims I won a date with Christian Pulisic?”

“Maybe.”

“When did you even do that?” She walked towards her bedroom, grabbing her purse and coat laying on the bed.

“Like a month ago, you and Troy were on a ‘break’ that I definitely thought was going to last longer than it did.” She put air quotes around break, making Y/N roll her eyes again. “Wonder where I got that idea from.”

She was about to respond when Troy came in, tapping his foot expectantly. “Erin, I don’t really care why you did it, can you just cancel on them for me?”

“No!” she yelled, shocking the other two. “It doesn’t have to be a romantic date or anything, but you are going out with Christian Pulisic! How else am I ever going to get to meet Tammy Abraham?” Y?N rolled her eyes again, ushering Erin out of her flat with Troy behind her.

“I don’t know, maybe you should have signed yourself up for that date thing and said Tammy?” she suggested as she locked the front door.

“He wasn’t an option, and how many times have you said that Pulisic was beyond fit?” Erin gulped as she saw Troy tense, regretting her words as she looked between the two.

“I’ll see you later, Erin.” With a terse smile, Y/N sent her best friend one more pointed look before ushering Troy down the stairs so they could start their date.

“Ay, Christian!” Tammy called as he opened the door to his hotel room. “Who’s the lucky girl?” he asked with a teasing smirk on his face.

“What girl?” Callum asked, sitting up on his bed to look at the American boy who laid upside down on his own bed.

Christian groaned, sitting up so he could show the boys his new email. Fikayo smirked as he sat down, grabbing the phone in Christian’s outstretched hand to read the news.

“Christian lost a bet two months ago on who could get the most crossbar hits, and he had to agree to be one of the premier league players that joined the ‘Win a date’ contest,” Tammy explained, smiling wide as Christian just shook his head. “Put a reminder in my phone for when the winners would be announced so I could come tease him about it.”

“Check her Instagram yet?” Mason asked from his spot on the desk. It seemed everyone was enjoying this but Christian.

“I’m pulling it up right now,” Fikayo answered, copying the Instagram handle that was provided into the search bar, resulting in one page: y/ninstagram. Fikayo clicked on it, nodding as the pictures loaded. “She’s fit.”

Tammy grabbed the phone next, scrolling through with his own smirk. “Definitely your type, Captain America.”

Christian groaned at the nickname, watching as his phone was passed around his friends. “I don’t have a type.”

All four looked at him with a pointed look, making him blush from their stares. “Looks like she has a boyfriend though,” Callum added, brows furrowed as he looked at the pictures himself.

Christian, also confused, grabbed his phone back. He couldn’t deny that she was very attractive, and if he had a type, which he didn’t, then she fit it really well.

“Why’d she sign up if she had a boyfriend?” Mason asked, though no one had an answer from him.

“Wait,” Christian interupted, “she dmed me.”

y/ninstagram : hey, idk if you’re even gonna see this cause you have like 3 million followers but i’m the girl who like “won a date” with you. My friend signed me up cause she thought it’d make me get over my ex but we actually got back together. I just don’t think i should be going on a date with a man im not in a relationship with. Anyway, i’m gonna contact the people in charge and tell them to pick a different person.

y/ninstagram : also, hope you get better soon so you can be back in blue!

Y/N had just reached the top of the steps when Erin opened her door, a sheepish look on her face. “How was your date?” Y/N sent her a scathing look, fiddling with the keys as she walked to her own door. “Are you ignoring me now?”

Still not answering, Y/N opened the door to her flat, though she wasn’t mad enough to lock Erin out. She held the door open for Erin to follow her in. “It was a nightmare,” she answered while shrugging her jacket off. “Thanks for that.”

Erin followed Y/N to the kitchen, sighing at her friend as she pulled open her fridge for the wine sitting in the door. “I’m sorry, I knew better than to say those things about Pulisic.”

“With Troy here!” Y/N cut her off, turning around with the wine in hand and a sad look in her eyes.

Erin’s heart dropped, feeling even worse as tears welled in Y/N’s eyes. “What happened?” Erin walked to her, pulling her in for a hug.

“I messaged Christian, told him I couldn’t do the date and Troy stopped talking to me. It was so awkward. I feel like I’m being dramatic by crying right now, but I’m just tired of everything with him. Why can’t it be easy anymore?” Erin just hugged Y/N tighter, wishing that she could know how much better she deserved.

y/ninstagram : hi christian pulisic!!! This is erin, Y/N’s best friend. I just wanted to let you know that even though she said she’s backing out of the date, she won’t actually be doing that. I will make her go on that date with you even if I have to drag her out of her apartment and to the restaurant myself. Anyway, i also hope you get better soon and tell tammy abraham that he is fine

“Have you messaged her back?” Mason asked the next morning, looking at Christian expectantly. The American boy only looked down at his phone. “It’s been a night, Christian, and I think that she can see that you read her message.”

“I don’t even know how to answer her,” he defended. “Besides, her friend messaged me too, and she said that Y/N was going to go on a date with me even if she dragged her to it.”

“Mate, sounds like this girl doesn’t even like you,” Mason teased.

Tammy came to Christian’s rescue. “That’s not true,” he interrupted, placing his tray on the table next to Chris. “I did some research, and she’s a definite Blue.” Tammy’s smile grew wider, turning into a teasing smirk directed at his friend. “And she’s a Pulisic fan as well.”

“How do you know this?”

“She’s got a saved Story from the Burnley game. Properly drunk during the game and bought a Pulisic jersey. Friends tease her about it in the comments still.” Christian only blushed at his friends comments, looking down at his phone to see another message. She had dmed him again.

y/ninstagram : i am so sorry about erin, she’s very overzealous and can be a lot to handle. Don’t feel pressured to do this date. And don’t feel pressured to tell tammy he’s fine, she’s just obsessed with him lol. Hope to see you out against arsenal.

y/ninstagram : also i can see that you have read those other messages just a fyi

“Ayyo,” Tammy exclaimed, pulling up from peering over Christian’s shoulder. “Her friend thinks I’m fine.” The two others rolled their eyes at him. “What was that friend's name?” He leaned back down, squinting to read the screen.

“What, you gonna stalk her too?” Mason asked, but seeing Tammy buried in his phone gave him the answer he needed.

#chelsea fc #christian pulisic #read #christian pulisic fanfic #christian pulisic imagine #christian pulisic x reader #chelsea fc imagine #dani writes #football fanfiction

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purplesurveys · 3 years ago

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1273

What was the longest time you’ve had the hiccups for? Maybe for half an hour? Mine are never that bad.

What type of TV shows are your favourite? Not a big TV show type of person to begin with since it seems as if my attention span wasn’t built for once-a-week, season-breaks kind of content haha. I do like sitcoms, I guess...bite-sized ones like Friends, Brooklyn Nine-Nine, The Big Bang Theory, etc. Drama shows I’d bite into if the plot is extremely intriguing to me or relevant to my interests, like The Crown or Breaking Bad.

Have you ever been a complete fangirl/fanboy over anything? I was before then I wasn’t for a very long time, then I came back just recently with this BTS shit I got myself into.

Do you know anyone who has died in battle? Hmm. I don’t think so. My great-grandpa lived a few more decades after the war.

When was the last time you went on an adventure? July. My friends and I spent the whole day driving around and stopping by sooo many spots around the metro. It was a lot of fun and we were fucking b e a t after.

What brand is your vacuum cleaner? I dunno. My mom mainly uses ours.

Are you good at rapping? I have a number of songs and verses memorized that I can recite quite okay, but I can’t write any of my own.

Name one world issue that upsets you. Racism.

How do you feel about tanning? I never saw the the big deal. I will say tanning beds and salons are such a culture shock to me, though. Are some people really that obsessed with modifying their skin tone?

Have you ever given a public speech? Hmm, just the one time I was entered into a public speaking competition and was given a topic to talk about on the spot. That was honestly a lot of fun and I wish there were more opportunities to do that exact same thing.

Do you read comic books? No. I tried getting into that whole thing, but didn’t see the appeal.

Do you force your way into conversations in which you are not involved? Not always but if I’m starting to feel left out or awkward, I will start to ask a question here and there to ease my way into the conversation. But if the topic is clearly none of my business then I do stay out of the way.

Kiss with your eyes open or closed? Closed.

Do you believe you can change someone? This isn’t a black and white matter, I think. The idea of changing a person can have a lot of layers; in my org, for instance, I got to pick up a few quirks and behaviors from my friends just by being around them for a long time – in that sense, I changed. But you can also strive to change someone who’s struggling and try to make them become happy, which I tried to do with my ex – which of course I learned the hard way that you can’t change someone if in that context.

How did you react when your first pet died? I was bummed out but didn’t throw a fit.

Have you ever drawn anime? No.

Can you use a pogo stick? I’ve never even seen one in real life. I’m dying to try it out just once.

When’s the next time you’ll see the person that you like? I don’t like anybodyyy.

Do you like bathing/showering? I mean...yes? Like I’m not obsessed with showering, but it’s a necessity that I have to regularly do anyway lmao.

Have you ever considered entering a race? Sure! Just give me a couple of weeks to practice because my endurance and stamina are embarrassing.

Rihanna or Lady Gaga? Rihanna.

Who was your first good kiss with? My ex.

What accessory do you want in your bedroom? SHELVES

What do you take the most pictures of? My experiences.

What are you always in the mood for? Starbuuuuuuckssssssss.

What is something that you never turn down? A day out with friends. I’ll always make time. What is something that you always turn down when offered? Food, if I’m a guest at someone else’s place.

Name something sexy about your significant other. I don’t have any.

What is one of your hobbies that you refuse to give up? Surveys, I guess. I enjoy them too much and have been doing them for nearly a decade.

If you could be a professional in any sport what would it be? Tennis.

If you could be a professional at any instrument what would it be? PIANO.

Would you rather be a surgeon or mortician? Surgeon. I would be too terrified seeing dead people, anyway.

Have you ever been on a subway? Nope.

Are you in love? No.

Do you like having your lip softly bitten when you’re kissing? Sure. Softly, roughly...both are fine hahaha.

Do you want to get married when you’re older? I hope so. I want my turn, too.

What was the last band shirt you wore? Eh, I don’t own any. I wore a fanmade V-themed shirt yesterday, if that counts.

You can have a milkshake right now. What flavor do you choose? OMGGGG that sounds so fucking good rn. Chocolate chip cookie dough.

Have you ever given someone flowers? Mhm, I used to give my ex bouquets whenever it was our anniversary.

What day of the week is usually your busiest day? Monday like 98% of the time, so I hate them. It ultimately varies, though. Sometimes some days are a hell of a lot more hectic than others.

Do you have any concerts coming up? I mean...obviously not.

Do you like or hate the smell of fish? Oh yessssssss. The smell of seafood/ocean always makes me fucking drool.

What’s your favorite brand of chips? Pringles, or this local brand of salted egg chips that I love to get.

Have you ever written a poem and then read it aloud? Yeah, once. We had to write a poem as our homework and my teacher picked out a couple that he thought were the best-written, and one of them was mine even though I still firmly believe I did a shit job.

Do you like pineapple? Oh god no. One of the worse fruits I’ve had.

Does your house have a dishwasher? No. It seems to be just a Western thing.

Do you know anyone who has a flower tattoo? I probably do, but I just can’t give you a lineup of names. Flower tattoos seem to be trendy these days, especially in the line style.

How many different languages can you say goodbye in? So I have goodbye, paalam, 안녕히 가세요, adios, auf wiedersehen, sayonara, au revoir...so that’s 7.

Agree or disagree: You like Adam Sandler movies. Ummmm definitely childish and I can feel that the humor tries so hard sometimes but I do enjoy some of his movies, like 50 First Dates.

Have you ever had to get a tooth pulled? If so, what for? Yeah, I mentioned this on a previous survey.

Have you ever dated anyone while they were in jail? No, I’ve never dated anyone who’s been imprisoned.

If you’ve ever babysat, do you like it? I ‘babysat,’ but technically all eldest Asian daughters are expected to look out for their younger siblings and cousins anyway. I didn’t actively enjoy it, but sure, it was fun playing with them and it’s always nice to be viewed as responsible.

What is your favorite flavor on sunflower seeds? I don’t eat sunflower seeds. I don’t dislike them, I just really never seek them out.

Do you get cold easily? Yes.

Do you get a lot of spiders in your house? Hmm no. If we do get visited they are almost always too small to be seen.

Do you admire nature? Yeah, I try to be around it as often as I can.

Name one naughty thing you’ve done. Had sex while a few people were in the same room. I pay for it now hahaha; those friends who had the misfortune to be in that situation have never let me live it down and it’s one of their go-to stories when I’m being introduced to new friends.

Name two of your favorite things as a child. I loved everything Bratz. I also liked Play-Doh.

Do you own a Pillow Pet? No, I’ve never even heard of that.

Do you tend to solve problems with violence? Never.

Have either of your parents gone to jail? Nope.

Do you know a hoarder? I heard my grandma had been one, but I didn’t see traces of it when I used to visit her. I guess she had been when she was younger and stronger. I show traces of hoarding too, but I don’t think it’s at a concerning level; I literally just threw out a bunch of shit in my room I’ve hoarded over the last five or so years.

Do you wax, pluck, or leave your eyebrows? I don’t touch them; I’m never all that worried about my appearance. On very rare instances, I will shave some of the excess hair off. Do you have any interesting scar stories? None of them are interesting tbh, just results of my own stupidity.

Do you hate the texture of meatballs? I don’t hate their texture but I also just don’t enjoy meatballs in general. I find them boring, which has always led me to think if they’re really supposed to be just boring clumps of meat or if I’ve just always been served average meatballs.

Do you get migraines? Yes, I usually get one after work. They’ve decreased in frequency now but one will drop by every now and then to give me a shit time.

Do you like guns? No.

Are turtles amazing creatures? All animals are. :') < Yes! Except cockroaches.

How much time do you spend taking surveys? I dedicate an hour or so every weekend. I often wish I can allot more time, but I also have other hobbies and interests I would usually want to catch up on during the weekends. 48 hours is just too short :(

Would you rather visit: The Eiffel Tower or Egyptian Pyramids? Pyramids, in a heartbeat. I wouldn’t even need to think about it.

Would you like to work at a candy shop? Uh no. If I had to, it would be on the back-end, maybe in the corporate side of things lol.

Do you have feelings for someone? Nope.

Which one of your guy friends is the best looking? JM.

Do you have anything to say to your ex bf/gf? No.

Which band do you have the most of on your iPod/music player? I don’t use music players anymore but my Spotify always reminds me of how much I listen to BTS whenever they do one of their quirky listening habit reports lol.

Which song describes your mood at the moment? I want to go with RM’s Bicycle just because I’m feeling quite content and relaxed at the moment.

Which movie(s) do you quote the most? Eh, I’m not a big movie quoter.

Which one of your best friend’s friends would you most likely date? I honestly don’t see any of them as date-able.

Would you ever let anybody else drive your car? Sure. I’ve let Hans and Gab drive it countless times when I’ve had too much to drink. It’s a small car and is fairly easy to use and navigate. I would let Anj use it too at some point, but I want her to perfect her u-turns first hahahaha.

Which one of your friends will be the most successful? It’s already one of my friends to begin with but I’m not naming names. They come from a privileged background to begin with and their godfather already handed one of his companies down to them, so. They were also told the CEO position is already a sure slot for them.

What store did you last shop at? I wanna say NCAT, this Korean-themed store that sells trinkets and jewelries and plushies and stuff. They also sell BTS albums so Anj and I dropped by to check out and touch all the albums we can’t afford yet HAHA

Do you think telepathy is real? No.

When did you last draw something for fun? Last Saturday when I played an online drawing/guessing game with my uncles and aunts.

Who makes the most in your entire family? My dad.

Do you like writing essays? I love essays, it’s my favorite writing piece to make.

Do you think plastic surgery is no big deal? It turns into one when it gets obsessive, like when people get excessive plastic surgeries specifically to look like another person. I’m looking at you, fucking Oli London.

Do you take your trash to the dump or have it picked up? It’s picked up.

When you sneeze do you sneeze into your shirt or your hands? I look away and just sneeze. Sometimes I’ll put up my elbow.

Do you usually have sex in the morning, noon or night time? Erm, I usually had it at night. I only had morning sex when we would spend the night; and I nearly never had noon sex.

Did you ever fail your learners/drivers test? No.

Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne? Gun to my head, Lil Wayne.

Name someone you’ve become a lot closer to recently: Reena!!! I’m so grateful Angela introduced us to each other :) We both tend to get shy so we don’t actually actively get chatty when we see each other irl, but I love her presence and I love that she is my friend. I make up for it by being super friendly and wacky in our group chat haha. Does your car have a sunroof? No. We used to have a car that did, but we had to sell that during the peak of the pandemic.

Are you closer to your mom or your dad? Dad.

Have you ever had a friend with benefits? No.

Who’s the last person you cuddled with? My ex.

Are you friends with any of your teachers on Facebook? Yeup.

#survey #surveys

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hedgefairy · 4 years ago

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Okay, I know, I know, it's already old news, everybody and their uncle in the costuming community has already talked it over, but anyhoo, I made notes when I crawled my way through effing Bridgerton and I will be damned if I don't vomit them onto this site. I have 32 pages of this shit, I'm not gonna throw that away.

I'm also typing this on my phone because I'm stuck on a trainride that's just doubled in length because this is the 2021 Northern German snow storm. What, there's snowflakes on the rails? We cannot possibly keep up our schedule, say goodbye to 90% of the connections.

Okay, on to Bridgerton, Episode 1

We're in Britain (oh, London, okay), allegedly 1813. I see people who are clearly meant to be asympatico, but is this size incusivity I spot there? Daring! Gasp! Me li...

Oh wait, no. The character is promptly shamed for her figure (which is mostly caused by the horrible cut of her dress. Every size can look great in Regency garb, but never mind, we need to make the "fat one" look bad!).

Also, no shifts under the stays. Why. There was obviously enough budget, don't tell me you couldn't afford a few strappy tops - it's not like the rest is historically accurate, so it would have sufficed to send some poor underpaid intern to H&M and get some. Nvm, that wouldn't be sexay.

Wait, is the garishly dressed (always a sign of a character of bad character in a costume drama) woman Delphine from Selfridge? Does she always have to play bitches? That's not nice, and just because she has a recognisable face, which by modern (read: americanised) standards is not favourable enough. Ugh. But I like the actress, so I'll let it slide (for now).

Lol, buttocks.

Not sure about the girls' dresses. Also, the Queen is a WOC, cool!

Oh no, one of the Featherington sisters faints! But that's okay because the Featheringtons are just comic relief and foil anyway.

I get weird incest vibes from the Bridgertons.

So the court is clearly 18th century and the show is set in the 1810s. I've by now seen several explanations for this decision, I still think it robs the Queen of reproductions of her actual historical gowns which were heavily inspired by the 18th century but so. Magnificently. Weird. It would have been so neat, and more of a "hey, I'm kinda out of touch with things" vibe, but hey, I'm not the one getting paid for making those taffeta gowns here (her hair is glorious, tho).

I'm very into the intro.

That Regency gossip girl is a real b, not unlike the Dowager Countess of Downton (unpopular opinion, I think she's pretty overrated, yes, I like Maggie Smith).

Again, no shifts.

Where do I know the "pragmatic" Bridgerton sister from? Ah, it's The Paradise. And Jonathan Strange. (Wait, she's my age. And she's supposed to be a teenager. Man, do I love a good Dawson casting. I like the actress, though, she has a face ™!).

Aaaah. We get it. She's the spirited one. She also doesn't care about dresses because she's not like other girls™. I really like her voice (but she still doesn't sound like a teenager).

The heck is up with Lady F's dress and that of her friend? Oh, yeah. Antagonist fashion.

Of course the Featheringtons are Horrid Hags™ aside from Penny who's nice, but the pudgy one (at least we don't get a case of "she's not conventionally attractive so she's bad").

Oooh, the cousin! Supposed to suck, but ofc she's a stunner, and only Penny (who's the nice one, remember!) is delighted to have her around. She's also a POC, which is nice but apparently that means she does not follow fashion, hair-wise. I would have loved to see some Regency hair on her, it would have been so pretty *cries in Greek updo*

Ugh, we're still in Ep. 1, typing this on my phone was a bad idea.

Lady Danbury and the Duke guy are delightful with each other (more POC! So neat!).

The girl the oldest Bridgerbro screws is apparently a singer, which isn't up to status for his doucheship, and she doesn't wear a shift.

The music at the ball sounds like something from the Top 40s, but I'm woefully ignorant of contemporary music charts so I can't tell what it is. I like it when they do that in historical-ish works, making well-known pop or rock stuff work for the ambience (ugh, that dance scene to Golden Years in Knight's Tale. My heart. In a good way.)

I dig the Ducktail hair of Penny's crush. Oh, wait, that's a Bridgerbro. I don't quite get why the hair trends of the time don't apply to the POC characters or extras, but seeing how most white characters also show a shameful disregard for the weirdnes and gloriosity (that's not a word) that is early 1800s hair (the 1830s take the cake, tho) despite those hairdos being basically designed for white people hair, I don't think I care much (well, I do, but about all of them). Overall the hair is horrid and not very 1810s. Let's just leave it at that.

Like a good old romance novel (I've since been told that Bridgerton is supposed to be a pastiche of such novels, but I really couldn't tell from the series, not at all, and I'm not inclined to read the books) we have

a pretty, kind, superpure daughter of the main family

the mean matriarch (could have been an aunt, too, but here she's the mum) of the rivalling or antagonist family

a spirited daughter of the main family (in most romance novels this would be our heroine but so far she refreshingly lacks a love interest and pretty daughter seems to get the most screen time)

a Horrid Suitor™

a Hot Suitor™ who doesn't want attention

a really good and doting good parent

Lol, misheard Greece for Grease with Ducktail Bridgerbro, whose name is Colin, apparently. This is funny because of his Danny Zuko memorial hair.

Overall a bit too much bling for my taste, and too few pearls. It looks like an episode of My Super Sweet Sixteen with a Regency theme.

Of course the romance is going to be the Pretty One aka. Daphne and the Duke and he's even bros with her eldest bro. Wait, are they exes? I can haz bi? No? Aww, shucks. Maybe in another episode (spoiler: no).

Okay, WHAT is it with Lady F's dresses and hair. Like, she reminds me of Mars Attacks. Which, as you might remember, was not set in the Regency period.

Lord B (Bridgerbro the Eldest) sucks, he's screwing Opera Girl without any intention of marrying her but he's bitchy about his sister being ogled by his Eton (or wherever) bestie?

Oh, I'm in Hamburg now. And my train back home got canceled, so back to Berlin it is because there's not a single option to get to Hanover tonight, at least that's what the lady from the train station is saying, "oh well, you'll have to go back and try again tomorrow", so that's awesome...

Honestly, if it weren't so late and I didn't have things to do at home I'd find this terribly exciting.

Back to Bridgerton!

Where were we? Ah.

I can't even read my own annotation. Something about George III. I think I was upset about how they totally ignored that it's called Regency because George IV acted as the regent king, and he doesn't even feature in the series, I guess because they wanted to play up the Queen? Not a fan, because thanks to Horrible Histories I'm quite fond of that guy.

Again, no shifts.

Oh, look, it's Horrid Suitor™, destined for leftovers.

The Featherington cousin gets all the attention but no fleshed-out character.

Penny Featherington's dog is named Lord Byron, which ❤️

I like the Duke! He's there, drinking in his club (even though they're a patriarchal remnant of the past I have a weird appreciation for stuffy Gentlemen's Clubs, I blame Bertie Wooster and the Drones), calling Lord B out for his general fuckery.

Oh no, Ducktail Colin is more into the Cousin than Penny, who obviously pines for him!

Thank you, Lord B, for enabling Horrid Suitor™. Nobody asked you to be such a fucktwit.

The Queen is, of course, a bit of a bitch, but patronage from cool Lady *scrolls up for name* Danbury ensues for Protagonist Girl™ Daphne.

"I wish they had found a better trend language", what the heck did I even mean by that? That's what you get for just scribbling down notes while watching and simultaneously sewing. 18th century pants, in case you wanted to know.

Cousin is angry, probably because Lady F behaves like Cinderella's evil stepmother, because Cousin is prettier than her daughters and gets, like, all the suitors because Lord B bitched away everyone who wanted to get into Daphne's dowry ifyouknowwhatImeanwinkwinknudgenudge, right across the street into Cousins parlour.

The Bridgertons are annoyingly perfect. Ugh.

Oh look, it's "banter" between Daphne and Dukey! It's so Pride & Prejudice! It's almost a tiny bit Shakespeare! I put banter in parentheses because wow, nope, I'm not getting any chemistry here.

Uh, Lady B calls out Lord B (aka. her son aka. Bridgerbro the Eldest) for his screwery with Opera Girl and his outpimpery of his sister to Horrid Suitor™, buuuurrrrrnnn. He promptly calls of his affair with Opera Girl.

No shifts!

Penny gets to dance with Ducktail Colin at the thing! Good for her, but it's a country dance with jumping and fun, because she's a) the pudgy character and b) a Featherington, so it can't be something romantic and pretty (I personally like country dances, but they aren't protagonist dances).

Oooh, Cousin had her period, oh no, oh snap, oh she didn't, because she's PREGNANT! Shit, that's problematic, and not because she's an unmarried woman in the 1810s, but because she gets close to no lines at all so far, and suddenly she's pregnant and telling Lady F that she sucks for being privileged, violence ensues, this is ugly. Man, I get what some critics mean by "the POC actors*actresses get all the problems" and that not exactly being great.

Horrid Suitor™ makes property claims about Daphne, eeewwwww, thanks to Lord B's general suckiness, ewww, r@pe attempt ensues, was that really necessary? It doesn't really fit in with the rest of the series and generally nope, yay, broken nose! (which was indeed totally necessary). Nice one, and probably the only scene so far (spoiler: overall) in which I actually like Daphne. Dukey thinks a mean left hook is attractive, and, generally speaking, he's not wrong.

Daphne and Dukey come up with a pseudo-shakespearean plot to pretend to be totally into each other so she can attract suitors by being not available and he gets not to have fangirls by being not available, and as someone who has read a few too many historical-ish bodice rippers I know exactly where this is going. I mean, come on.

I can't see enough of the following choreography to complain about it. Man, I miss historical dance classes.

And that concludes Ep. 1! Finally! Thank you for getting this far, sorry for all of it (especially typos, it's the bane of unwanted autocorrect), I guess?

Update on the train situation: I've been told by the ticket control person that I shouldn't get my hopes up until noon tomorrow.

To be continued,

because I didn't take these 32 pages of notes for nothing.

#Bridgerton #Hedgewatch #historical costuming #Well not really because wow these costumes #Thank you for travelling with Deutsche Bahn #2021 norther Germany snow storm #Trainwriting #Snarky commentary #I wish I was better at captions but it's late and I've been wearing a mask for four hours straight now and I'm hungry #Bridgerbore

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thirstofgames · 4 years ago

Text

kitty and the jailbird

#️⃣2️⃣

-IT'S A MATCH-

A blank chat popped open and Damien stared at it for a second. He had honestly not expected it. The girl actually swiped him right. He looked at the clock impatiently; he did not have much time left in the library. There was a loud shout from the hallway, his muscles tensing, ready to hide the phone and bolt at any second.

He regretted that last question right as he pushed send. It sounded so bitter in his head now. It was a dating app after all and she was a good looking young woman.

you there?

...

hello?

busy flirting with your other matches, huh?

And there it was all about to end, the hot topic of his whereabouts. And the swift and cruel rejection that followed. It had already happened one too many times! Could he go through his again? Was it worth it? His palms were sweaty, but he never felt so cold. If the ground could just open up and swallow him whole before she finished asking...

No, sorry

Just a little surprised we matched

you can unmatch if you want

Well, what I want is to talk with you 😊

Your profile caught my eye

what part?

Your profile pic at first.

Most guys can't pull off the broken, deep and scowling thing

But... looks good on you.

you don't look so bad yourself-

but then I read your description...

and I have to know something

shoot 🙄

It was a simple Yes/No question, but it took Kate way to long to answer. She bit her lip, thinking hard on the possibilities. It was such an unfair question though. She was not going to leave, but was not going to pursue anything with him until she knew what he was in for and how long he was going to be locked up. She'd wasted enough years waiting up on others...

I'm just a little confused 🤔

Are you really in jail?

you gonna leave if I say yes?

It really depends...

A bittersweet smile spread on his lips. What was he expecting from a girl like her? She probably had a nice job, a supporting family and tons of friends and... an actual future. Why would she even consider wasting her time with him? The little time he had left... Better to just pull off the band aid!

She felt to bad! She hadn't meant to disregard his feelings, but wasn't it fair to let her know what she was getting into? She didn't even know what he was expecting from the conversation they were having... She was curious, but she didn’t want to lead him on.

okay, let's just say...

the orange pants and barbed wire are real

OMG

I have so mane questions 😱

here we go...

What did you do?

Wait, where do you even hide your phone?

STOP!

enough with the interrogation, alright?

I'm just curious...

sure, but i'm more than just a prisoner

a little respect goes a long way

Kate’s heart sank. He was hot, but the prison was a serious issue... She supposed people were not lining up to get to know him. He seemed pretty well rounded and mannered, but he was very defensive about his crime. Did that mean it was something really bad? But he was on a dating app... so maybe he was getting out soon?

You're right!

I'm so sorry 😓

Let's change the subject

Why don't you tell me what you're looking for

hmmm

What?

i'm thinking...

nobody's really asked me that before

Seriously?

most people stop talking to me when they find out i'm locked up

i don't really blame them. i'm rough around the edges.

She didn't say anything for a while and Damien started wondering if he should just close the damn phone and leave. He should also probably take a break from Lovelink after this... it clearly wasn't doing him any good. Dark thoughts swarmed his mind and he had to close his eyes and head his head back against the bookshelf to get rid of the harrowing feeling. Like he was falling in an endless pit...

The screen showed him typing and deleting several responses. Kate pursed her lips, impatient. Had she said anything wrong? She’d never spoken to someone who’d been locked up, she was still unsure what could trigger painful memories, or just remind him that he was... not free. But he said he just wanted to chat and his profile mentioned 'deep conversations'...

Okay, I'm not running away, for now

but...

But I can't really make up my mind

If I don't know anything about you

So...

alright

honestly I'm just looking to talk to someone from the outside

it can get pretty boring in here, just waiting around the clock

Let's be friends then 😊

I'll be your window to the outside world

If that's alright with you...?

Damien sighed on the other end. Beggars can’t be choosers. It was a step in the right direction though. Maybe he was not going to find the love of his life at the very fucking end of said life. He was not living in some fairytale! He was still going to die, alone and forgotten.

But maybe... just a little less alone at the very end of his road. One friend meant more than none and maybe, just maybe... he could tell her his side of the story. Eventually. She seemed patient and understanding enough. Let at least one person out there know he did not murder his own father.

sure

that's more than most

Of course a pretty thing like her got a lot on attention... She was only chatting up with him because the others were offline-

but it must have been pretty bad to be such a long sentence

you still can't tell me what the crime was?

look, i've been making my own rules my whole life

you better ask what crimes I DIDN'T do

wow...

i'm no bragging or anything, just letting you know where I'm at

anyways, I'm more interested in what you're all about

what are you doing on an app like this?

Honestly...

I was about to uninstall it right before we matched 😅

you already found the one?

or no luck at all?

Well, I went on a few nice dates...

i see

Suddenly his experience on the app seemed less awful. Maybe it was not the right place. Or perhaps it was just the place for a misfit like him, here with all the weirdoes and con artists.

And then they ditched me for their exes

Just my luck 😂

Oh and I swear to god if I see one more vampire 🙄 🙄 🙄 🙄 🙄

vampires?

Yeees

You wouldn't believe some of the things I saw...

OMG, one dude was actually dresses up as a centaur

I...

don't even want to ask

There's also the 'prince' scam going around

Dudes claiming to be the heirs of some

Made up countries and asking you for money

It wasn't quite a rejection, but it still hurt a little. She already mentioned twice she was only interested in him as friends. She didn't need to spell it out every few minutes! But she was the only one...

Met some nice people too ☺️

Actually became good friends with some

Which is nice since I just moved here

were did you come from?

Pallay 💜

you're a long way from home

I know 😢

I suppose it was getting kinda lonely

My friends and family come visit when they can

But that's not a lot...

what brought you here?

Got a really good job opportunity

But I didn't quite realize how far away I'd be

So yeah, to answer your question from before...

I'm kinda just chatting with new people

Made more friends than anything else lol

Hope that's aright with you 🤗

A smile crept on his lips. An actual, genuine smile. How long had it been since he had any reason to? God, it felt good to talk to someone! Someone who didn't know him, who didn't shout 'walking corpse' after him, didn't judge him. He almost felt like his old self. Almost.

i'm cool with that

Great!

Looking forward to getting to know you, Damien 😄

so let's get to it

tell me about yourself

hobbies, favorite food, anything

my hobbies are always changing 🤔

I start something new every month or so

Oh, and I started volunteering at a vet lately

🐱🐶💕

With a friend I made on this app

it suits you

Hmmmmm how would you know?

We've only just met

just a hunch

I could secretly be evil 😈

you couldn't hurt a fly

besides, I've seen evil and believe me

you're not it

I'm guessing you're not going to elaborate on that

Are you?

see, you know me so well already

Smartass 😝

At lest until she finds out.

And I love food 🤤

Who doesn't? lol

But picking a favorite is like... impossible

I do have one hell of a sweet tooth 🍫🍬🍦

I'm soooo jealous

I miss making my own meals

That's right! You probably just have a cafeteria.

I'm so sorry 😓

it's cool

i'm glad we have something in common

Is there any food you miss?

Wait... was there even steak in that picture? Kate felt her ears burning, the fluffy pajamas studently itching at her skin.

just makin my own in general, being in charge in the kitchen

Damien scrolled quickly through his phone, the memories leaving a bitter taste in his mouth. He nearly didn’t send the photo. It felt like so long ago, a different time...a different person. But it felt so good to remember! To be reminded of the more happier moments when he had all his life ahead of him! And showing her a piece of his past may make her curious enough to stick around for a while longer.

He hit Send.

-Tap to download photo-

Looks... delicious

you like steak?

Oh yeah, the food 😳

Wish I could have a bite of that hahaha

So not so shy and innocent as she claimed. Good to know. Even if it didn’t lead anywhere, which he had to be realistic about - he was on death row after all - it was still fun. The most fun he’d had in a long while. It felt...nice.

HA!

i wish you could too 😏

The door of the library swung open hitting the opposite wall. The guard in charge could be heard arguing with someone. At least four voices. He had to move fast.

I'm really hungry now 😅

good

Kate stared at the screen, the little green light besides his profile picture going grey. She scrolled through the conversation as if to make sure she hadn’t just imagined it. She tapped the picture he’d sent, a small smile creeping on her lips. He looked so... normal. Well, more like smoking hot, but she expected some kind of dump, or some greasy repair shop, not Greek sculpture level abs. The boy should come with a warning! She was a sucker for bad boys, but had she gotten so bad that she was now considering a fucking convict? What if he was a murderer or something??

shit!

???

someone's coming

gotta hide my phone

talk soon

Be careful! 🙏🏻

Her ice cream, forgotten on the coffee table, had turned to soup.

What had she gotten herself into?

#lovelink #damien jones #kitty and the jailbird #austin russo #counterpart

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zalrb · 4 years ago

Note

It's so funny to me seeing you compared DJ to SC! I had never thought of those parallels?! It’s funny though, I asked about your SE/DE to PJ thoughts not so long ago because in my mind by the end I actually saw DJ/DE, PJ/SE, PA/SC. I definitely see how some would easily disagree. But dynamic-wise I feel Andie has similarities to Caroline, and Pacey really reminds me of Stefan(no matter the constant Damon comparisons), so despite different dynamics and narratives, maybe aspects of PA are what SC could have been for me, since I hate SC and love PA? Maybe it’s DC having better writing/chemistry/dynamics for some ships makes direct comparisons complex? SC are comparable to DJ and PA. I see how DJ/SC have best friends to lovers and more. But I think PA/SC have the helping one another, bringing out a different side and pushing, the respect, and later Andie realising she wasn’t what Joey was to Pacey. I’ll hold off on a “which character or ships are similar to one another between DC and TVD” type of question, I’m more curious what you’ll think about that after or alter in this rewatch… But I guess my question is if you find PA and SC at all comparable, in parallels or potential? Sorry this ended up being such a rant! I hope it all makes sense ha.

Not that Pandie or Poey are that comparable to Delena, but when I see people make the obvious "Pacey is like Damon" comparison I'm like... fine *IF* we compare narratives, I think of your Rogan vs Delena breakdown, even any aspects of the characters that are meant to be similar (ex. self sabotage, spiraling insecurity, feeling good enough, wit/bravado etc.) and Pacey's growth outside and within his relationships are, I feel, BETTER PORTRAYED, everything Damon/DE tried and failed at narratively(let alone chemistry, and acting portrayal because Joshua Jackson gets me). I would love to read a breakdown if you have any thoughts on the Pacey/Damon and growth comparisons! :)

Pacey vs Damon anon// "Damon didn’t actually grow and because Damon caused essentially all of the dysfunction in Mystic Falls as opposed to being a product of dysfunction (like Pacey)." Wow. You put this so well! No matter the possible breakdowns of comparing their portrayals, in the end that's exactly it. They didn't show or write Damon growing(and I think a major consistent difference between the two was accountability, Pacey's issue often being overly self blaming, not just insecurity and deflection like a Dawson or Damon). But your pointing out that despite similarities it comes down to Damon being a cause versus Pacey being a product… wow, your mind lol. Seriously though I don’t have words, that’s just IT, so completely true. Thank you.

Pacey vs Damon anon (again lol)//I mean you’re welcome ha, but thank you again, your second response, again, put things so well! Pacey was constantly told he couldn’t be enough so he’d self destruct, believing nothing would make a difference. But you pinpoint that self destruction doesn’t necessarily mean lashing out. Even *if* both had justified insecurities, Damon’s self destruction hurts others, not just himself, “he doesn’t let anyone see the good in him and it’s easier to just kill people and lash out and continue to create dysfunction for the people around him.” Plus, as you said Pacey only finally felt he could change his fate when Andie came along, and to me it’s significant that when presented with the chance Pacey *chose* to change and help himself in action. Damon would *cause* his own destruction and that of others, and *chose* not to change. And I would argue that Damon was constantly encouraged and presented with options to change and would self destruct to push people away?! Damon wasn’t silently crying out for help. Now I’m just rant agreeing ha, but bottomline, as you’ve said, they’re really only superficially comparable at best.

This is an in-depth ask so I’m sorry that my response is going to be very short but can you tell me when Caroline pushed and challenged Stefan that brought about a change or development in his character directly from that push/challenge? I’m genuinely asking.

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surveys-at-your-service · 4 years ago

Text

Survey #392

“l.a. is where stars come to die”

Do you think there’s anything you did better when you were younger? I think I was a better writer, honestly. Like I've developed in some areas, like being less over-dramatic, but I just think my creativity in wording and such has dulled down. Who was the craziest teacher you’ve ever had? I've never had a "crazy" teacher, honestly. What’s the last thing you got paid to do? Take pictures. What’s the most romantic thing you’ve ever done for someone else? How should I know? Ask either Jason or Sara. Have you ever wanted to model? No. Have you ever seen someone have a seizure? I THINK my sister? Teddy had seizures in his old age, too. What’s your favorite car? I don't have one, really. Do you know any HTML or CSS? If yes, how much? I know veeeeery little basics. LIke, I can change the color of shit and that's about it lmao. Do you tend to care about the lives of celebrities? Why or why not? Only celebrities I really really care about, like Mark. What do you think of the scene style? #aesthetic and I will ALWAYS be envious of the hair. Have you ever told an extremely inappropriate joke? Oh god, I remember one. What is the highest you have been up, other than in an airplane? On a certain faire ride, I wanna say. Is there any hope of you ever seeing your favorite band in concert? Ozzy does want to do another tour at some point, but he's fighting Parkinson's currently, so it's not guaranteed it will happen. Mom and I planned on going to his last one that was scheduled, but the diagnosis cancelled it. :( What is your favorite non-green vegetable? Uhhhhh I guess potatoes. What is your favorite non-traditional fruit? I don't think I've even had a non-traditional fruit. Just basic stuff. Have you ever had Swedish Fish? Yeah, I'm not a fan. What is your favorite origami shape? Birds, I guess. Do you usually take the stairs or the elevator? I pretty much always take an elevator if one's available because my legs can barely handle stairs at all. It's agonizing for me. Do you need a key card to get into the building you live in? No. What was the last takeout food you had? I had a burger from McDonald's a few days ago. Do you take the pickle off your burgers? No, I love pickles on burgers. Do you share a bed with anyone? Just my cat. If you’ve read or watched Harry Potter, which book/movie is your favorite? I haven't. What’s the last app you downloaded on your phone? I re-installed DragonVale. What do you know the most about? Meerkats, Markiplier, and Silent Hill, probably. What TV shows can you not stand? What's that stupid show on Adult Swim, Rooster Teeth or something like that? That shit was so dumb. Have you ever tasted your own tears? I mean not intentionally. Sometimes tears just fall down a spot where it happens. Are your legs hairy? I can almost guarantee to you that I probably have the hairiest legs of any woman you've ever met. Do you like Cheese-Itz? I love them! We don't really buy them though because both Mom and I can destroy a box of them. Have you ever built a sandcastle? I have. Did you ever watch Barney as a child? Yeah, I loved Barney, but not as much as my older sister. She literally "married" him, haha. Have you ever had a pet rabbit? No, but my older sis did as a kid. That poor thing died and Ashley didn't know for THREE DAYS. Mom took it out earlier and I guess she wanted to see how long it took Ash to notice? She didn't take great care of it, so. Are you wearing anything of any sentimental value? Describe? Yes, my friendship ring with Sara. To you, what is especially distracting? Tapping noises. When was the last time you did some major cleaning? MAJOR cleaning? Good question. How do you feel about people who neglect their pets? It sickens me. Have you ever contemplated cheating on anyone? Nope. When are you likely to lie? Probably when I don't want to seriously hurt someone. What is a personality type that you do not like? I hate people who think they know everything, are unwilling to acknowledge their flaws and work on them, feel they're better than others, are closed-minded, sexist, bigoted, racist... What is a personality type that you DO like? I am drawn to people who are empathetic and try to understand and consider more than just themselves, are caring and genuine, philosophical and think deeply, are calm, friendly, good listeners, and have a light sense of humor. Which of your friends is the least like you? In what way? I actually don't know. MAYBE Mini with her being extremely conservative to a frustrating degree and overwhelmingly religious. We diverge pretty strongly in beliefs that are important to me. How about the most like you? In what way? Sara! We have incredibly similar interests and morals, and we both are wild over animals. When was the last time you felt under-appreciated? I'm gonna be completely transparent here, even though it's uncomfortable to admit. I was very unhappy with the literally two interactions a poem I was really proud of got on dA. Like it was one I was trying to get published prior to just posting it there, so it was really disappointing to feel so overlooked when you worked hard on something you felt came out great. Does anyone take advantage of you or take you for granted? No. Are you taking anyone for granted? I sure as hell hope no one feels like I do. I definitely try to appreciate those I have to the utmost. What is one selfish thing that you do? I prioritize my alone time probably too much. How about something selfless? I'm pretty much always willing to listen to people's hardships and comfort them even if my own mental health is in poor condition. What do you like to do on your favorite holiday? Just be with family and really focus on how lucky I am to have them. What helps you fall asleep? I guess really paying attention to slowing my breathing, but that doesn't always work. It takes me at LEAST half an hour to fall asleep, so I struggle no matter what. Is there anyone you wish you were still friends with now? Megan. I really, really miss her. What is a fear you want to overcome? SOCIAL ANXIETY. UGH. What is something you do not like about yourself, with good reason? I'm lazy. What do you usually cry about? PTSD. Do you like pizza better on the second day? No. What do you like on your pancakes? Butter and normal syrup. Have you ever made up your own emoticon? I don't think so. How do you generally meet people? Online in one way or another. Have you ever seen a Broadway show in New York? No. Are you listening to music right now? Yeah, "God Hates Your Outfit" by Jeffree Star lmao. Look, it's catchy. Can anyone in your immediate family play the guitar? No. Have you ever wished to be an internet celebrity? How about a ‘real’ one? No. Like I've actually *loosely* considered trying to be a let's player with my love of games, but I don't even want to *risk* popularity; not that I think I'd get to that point, but still, I don't like the chance. Have you ever been kayaking? No. Do you still live with your parents? Yes. Do you believe you will never get over someone? I think Jason will always occupy at the very least a small corner of my mind. I just deal with loss so poorly in general, but that... that breakup was something. What do you order at Burger King? I don't like BK. Have you ever lived by yourself? No. Pretty sure I never could with my depression. What brand cell phone do you have? It's just a Tracfone, lol. Did you ever have a ‘security blanket’ when you were younger? Yes, my stuffed moose. What is your lucky charm? I don’t have one. Have you ever been in a wedding? Yeah, I was a bridesmaid in my sister's. Do you believe in yourself? ehhhhhh What time does your dad usually wake up in the morning? I don't live with him, so I can't say for sure. He's a mailman though, so he gets up early, I know. Who was the last person/people you were in a car with? Mom. What movie do you plan on watching next? I've been meaning to watch Jacob's Ladder for like... over a year, lmao. It served as an inspirational work for Silent Hill, and I know its reputation is brilliant, so I really want to see it. I just... don't really watch movies unless I'm in the theater. When something really scares you, what’s your immediate reaction? Gasp or go "what the fuck" or something along those lines. I can almost promise a curse word is coming out of my mouth, lol. Using song lyrics, say something to your most recent ex: I don't wanna get emotional digging through the songs that remind me of her, so pass, lol. You can only watch 4 TV shows for the rest of your life. What are they? Meerkat Manor, That '70s Show, maybe Pokemon even if I don't watch it anymore (it could be like a comfort show if I'm limited to four), aaaaand I think Ginga Densetsu Weed. Do you think it’s possible for a rap song to make you cry? ... Yes??? There are a couple that have for me. Does the idea of having a baby at your age scare you? I'm not having kids, sooo I don't have to worry about this. What band has the power to make you cry by splitting up? None. I'd be really upset if some did, but I wouldn't cry. Who is your favourite famous person who isn’t a singer, actor, or athlete? Well, I WOULD say Mark, but considering he's officially an actor now... guess not, haha. Uhhhh. Put him aside and I guess maybe Bindi Irwin. I'm not sure.

#survey #surveys #random questions #lyrics: ''god hates your outfit'' by jeffree star

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aw-eather · 5 years ago

Text

Heather Watched the Extended Threads.

As if I haven’t already had a bad morning, lets emotionally torture ourselves shall we. Here is my running commentary:

Under a read more cause it was 8 pages of notes.

That Previously On just shows that the main point of this episode is to get Sam and Jack together so if y’all don’t think they’re together after this, I have some news for you.

Gucci Douchebag making an appearance in the Previously On is not my idea of fun

JACOB I MISS YOU I AM ALREDY CRYING GOD HELP ME

Alright the episode has started with KERRY JOHNSON LOVE OF MY LIFE

Sam, you can’t be jealous, you’re literally MARRYING ANOTHER MAN.

Lol Jack you moron as if Daniel would walk through the door right now.

Sam is glaring at you funny just fyi.

But he’s right, Daniel is just waiting for y’all to be nice about him.

Oma I would like to order a plate of fucks to give about Daniel’s story at this point

Teal’c of the Tau’ri is a cute title I love that man

Aww I feel so proud of Teal’c.

FUCK OFF PETE

JAAACOOOB

Pete is so cringy

Jacob let Jack call him Dad once.. Pete has to wait until after marriage.

This is awkward as fuck

Pete you are so insensitive,

Jacob hates him. Same honestly.

You can tell he hates him tho, he’s not hiding it. My partners mum did a better job and she’s homophobic.

Sam is SO NOT in love with this guy

Oma being cryptic, checks out

Anubis makes me wanna punch someone.

This episode is really just tying up loose threads (probably hence the title) but its nice to know Pete is considered a loose thread 😊

Teal’c having to decide between the Jaffa and the Tau’ri is sad

Agh the newspaper and Daniel finding out about plans is an aggravating storyline

“I’m gonna marry him” reads the same as “Dad, I am happy”. Honey who are you trying to convince??? We don’t believe you.

“I know how happy he makes you” *Cut to Sam who looks nonchalant* *cut to Jacob who knows exactly what he’s doing and what he’s doing is attempting to stop her marrying Gucci Doucebag*

Selmak isn’t alive to make that call Jacob stop lying

I’M GONNA CRY AGAIN

She is really thinking about this. Like she looks like she’s second guessing herself constantly.

KERRY

JACK

KERRY AND JACK

JACK AND KERRY

WAKING UP TOGETHER

OH I LOVE THEM SO MUCH!

I love how soft and tender he is with her, I imagine he’d be the same with Sam.

I love how he cuddles her and kisses her and plays with her hair and that hand on her face I--- *insert heart eyes*

I just really love them so much I wish we got more of soft, boyfriend Jack

Trouble in Jaffa land lol

I think he did really like her though.

Anyway back to Half Ascended!Daniel

Oma ya shouldn’t have helped the first two times, that’s the fucking problem babe

I literally do not give a shit about Daniel, I’m sorry. I really try but I can’t

OH NO THE PHONE CALL SCENE

She is SO sick of Gucci Douchebag

I can’t believe he called her at WORK over FLOWERS

AND SAYING ITS URGENT FUCK SAKE

I love Peter in the back

Jack watching her

Jacob is playing matchmaker so hard I fucking love him

Sam’s face tho is sooooo funny LIKE DAD SHUT UP WE DON’T MENTION THIS IN FRONT OF MY CO

Oh the little sigh he does before telling her to go pick flowers I can’t handle that man, he’s so heartbroken its like a lost puppy

Jack smiles but his eyes say oh yeah, I lost her and she’s happy with someone else now. PLOT TWIST: she’s miserable

Sam looks hurt because she still loves Jack

FUCK ME IT HURTS THEY DESERVED MORE

Jacob don’t play dumb babe, we know what you’re trying to do

Oh she MAD MAD at Dad

Why is it ok to break some rules and not others, you ask? Because y’all are white and can get away with it?

Oma just stop helping people. You don’t need to help them, just stop. I don’t want to be an ascended being y’all suck

Chocolate or vanilla like go HOME WE DON’T WANT YOU HERE

Sam shaking her head no about getting blown up by aliens is so cute I love her so much

This feels like friends talking

Or like these two people I know who claim they’re in love but its always soooo awkward around them.

Generally speaking that’s my type like you haven’t had two alien boyfriends in the last 8 years babe

“I have a surprise for you” YOU BOUGHT A FUCKING HOUSE WITHOUT TELLING HER YOU CRETIN

THAT’S NOT A SURPRISE THAT’S CONTROLLING AND WEIRD

I hate that she looks happy. Don’t get me wrong I want her happy, I really do. And as much as I’m sure she loved Pete, she wasn’t in love with him. But I suppose she was happy for the first time with some one she could have… feelings are complicated, best not to have them honestly.

Jack has really long eyelashes. Just an observation.

That’s a lotta sugar, Danny boy. And Its not gonna make you any sweeter, I promise.

I love that he took the cup with him like he’s gonna drink it with THAT much sugar in it

Exposition, exposition, exposition.

Go away Anubis ya pain In the arse.

Oh the HOUSE

Have I said how much I hate that outfit cause I hate that outfit

It is a beautiful house to be fair but like…

Look at the PANIC in her eyes

I already have a problem with how they got engaged and the fact they stayed together after he STALKED HER.

Pete’s ability to control a situation and guilt trip her (literally he ran away and had her investigated by the FBI when she wouldn’t tell him about her work) reminds me of my ex. Which is probably why I hate him so damn much.

THE DECK SCENE

HER LOOKING AT HIS HOUSE

THE MUSIC

HE LOOKS GOOD IN DARK BLUE

I’M SORRY ITS ALL IN CAPS I’M TYPING AND WATCHING AND I’M SCREMING ON THE INSIDE DEAL WITH IT FAM I’M SORRY

THAT SMALL GRIN ON HIS FACE WHEN SHE SAYS SHE’S BEEN WORKING UP THE NERVE TO COME AND TALK TO HIM

TRUTH IS I’VE BEENTRYING TO WORK UP THE EVER FOR A LOT LONGER THAN THAT STOOP

ITS NOT GREAT JACK

YEAH BUT JACK HAS AN EVEN NCER HOSUE

SECOND THUGHTS

YES YOU ARE. GIANT MISTAKE INFACT

SHE’S REHEREDSE THIS SO MANY TIMES

KERRY FUCK OFFF NOW IS NOT THE TIME SWEETIE

THE BEER LOL

UES IT IS AWKKWARD

JACKS FACE OUCH

KERRY IS SO SWEET ASKING HER TO STAY FOR LUNCH

NO NOT DAD FUCK

Kerry caught him looking a little too long tbh

I’m not editing typos out of that btw it shows my rage

DAAAAAAD

JACOB YOU SWEET MAN

Oh sam honey I’m so sorry

I’m gonna cry again

FUCK OFF DANIEL JFC I literally do not give a shit

I only found out about Carmen’s death a couple months ago so I’m not gonna handle this well fam

Oh no

I’m typing and not looking again

Because Jacob is gonna tell her to go after Jack

I can’t breath

Six years ago

I’m not letting that go

It’s a continuity fuck up

Not that important but drives me nuts

No you’re not

He’s talking about jack

Come on sam he’s not dum

Everything you want is a house, a marriage and JACK

KERRY

LOVE OF MY LIFE

BREAKING UP WITH JACK FOR THE GREATER GOOD

I really like YOU Kerry

He’s so sad

He really liked Kerry

Retire please sir

Bye Kerry, I miss you already <3

If he told Sam he loved her right now she’d drop everything for him

He’s contemplating it

He’s confused but he’s thinking abut it because she’s stressed right now and ENGAGED but damn Kerry makes good points

More explanation and blah blah

Like if this was the main point of the story, there would be more talk of it outside of Daniel and we wouldn’t have just had 20 straight minutes if Sam and Jack pining over each other

Sorry can we talk about how PETE put a down payment on a house with OUT talking to her?? What if she didn’t like the neighbourhood?

Sorry I’m still mad about that

To be fair that green does look good on Daniel

Oma looks so proud

THEN STOP -B R E A K I N G- IT YOU GOOSE

Fuck sake woman

I’m so emotionally traumatised by this episode that I can’t remember half of what is added and half of whats in the 40 minute cut because I am repressing it lol. Obviously the scene with Kerry and the ones with Pete

NO JACOB

AND JACK BEING THERE FOR SAM

AND THEY MIGHT AS WELL HAVE SAID I LOVE YOU ALL OVER AGAIN

SORRY I NEED A TEN MINUTE BREAK TO CRY

OK I’m back

Sam looking at her like he wants to tell her he loves her breaks my tiny stone cold heart even more

He didn’t actually NEED to put his arm around her but they both actually really did need it

The way she rubs her thumb on his hand and leans into him I fucking can’t

AND MORE DANEIL FFS

Sorry I just feel like this was supposed to be the A plot, Dakara was the B plot and Sam/Jack was the C plot but it ended up Sam/Jack = A, Daniel and Anubis = B, Dakara = C

Took ya long enough to catch on, Danny boy

Good BYE PETE

You didn’t know shit from the beginning go home

That’s the same shade of blue Jack had on before… interesting

I mean it does have something to do with her father…

She will, babe, don’t stress

To be fair, to give him some credit, he took it like a champ

But also don’t be a creep ya know

Why does Sam’s jacket look awkward

She just looks awkward this entire sequence

INCOMING WORMHOLE

What, pray tell, is the point of the self destruct if it doesn’t blow up the gate? Isn’t that part of the point?

Daniel ya tit, that’s not gonna work

Fuck YEAH OMA

BEAT HIS FUCKING ASS

Now Daniel can come back to earth and be with Vala thanks

Literally the only time I like him is with Vala and then its with a push

This seems a little too convenient tbh

I know it was OMA but this episode just feels…. Disjointed

Ah but will you destroy it? Probably not knowing the Jaffa

I wonder if Sam and Jack have spoken by now. Clearly not the same day because different clothes.

I’d say two days since Dad?

Ack Naked!Daniel

Jack is so AWKWARD I LOVE HIM

SAM CAN’T LOOK AT HIM

BRA’TAC IS ENCOURAGING THIS BULL SHIT

F I S H I N G

I can believe it, Sam.

She’s leaning towards him

Aw that giggle

That look she gives him

They’re so happy

This was the perfect ending

It should have finished there

How much time passed between then and s9 I wonder

At least a month right because Sam had been away a month?

Well that was good.

Hurt my heart but it was good

Final notes:

Jacob and Janet deserved better

I want more Kerry

They should have stopped at s9

Sam and Jack are together now, TRY and convince me otherwise

I’m thinking of smutty fic ideas for the cabin please stop me

Thanks for coming along on that emotional roller coaster ride. Ended up being 9 pages of dot points so I’m sorry! But I feel like I’ve said my bit.

Oh one last thing

Fuck Pete 😊

#SG1 #Stargate SG1 #Stargate #SG1: Threads #Sam x Jack #Jack x Sam #OTP: They might as well have said I love you #Samantha Carter #Jack O'Neill #Teal'c #Daniel Jackson #Oma De Sala #jacob carter #kerry johnson #Gucci Douchebag #ATapps #RDA #mostly #Mudblood-and-proud watches

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loveisblindfanfictionbka · 4 years ago

Text

Love Is Blind: Chapter Four

Leandra and Melissa sat at the cafe table with Robyn and she told them about her conversation with Chris.

“So he’s got you thinking exactly what we’ve been telling you all these years,” Melissa mused.

“No, he just has me questioning if there was something in my marriage that I missed,” Robyn replied.

“I think you should meet him, Robs,” Leandra interjected, “you two seem to have a really good understanding.”

“No, we have a good thing going. I don’t want to ruin that.”

“I don’t think you want to be happy.”

“I do want to be happy but on my own terms. And I’m not ready. Talking to him made me think about my ex and just reminded me that I really still love him. And I don’t want to. I swear I don’t want to but something has this hold on me and-”

“We get it. Y’all were together for a long time.”

“It’s not just that. It’s- you ever meet someone and you just know that they’re it? Well he was it for me.”

“So what do you call this thing with Christian?”

“A friendship. I have no interest in making it more than that.”

“You ever been to therapy?”

“I tried it for a few weeks but I didn’t get anywhere.”

“Maybe you should try it again.”

“I don’t know.”

“Robyn, do you like being miserable or something? Is that the only thing still connecting you to Chris? Because if not, I don’t understand your apprehension to getting better.”

“I want to get better, I’m just scared of what that means.”

“Well Sis, you’ll never find out until you try.”

Robyn sat back in her office after returning from lunch with Leandra and Melissa. She didn’t have any appointments until 3 unless any emergencies came in so she had time to just think. She grabbed her phone and went to her dating app

A: Are you available to talk?

A few minutes went by before she got an answer

C: Sure, I just finished my last class. What’s up?

A: My friends think I should go to therapy

C: Ok. What do you think?

A: I’m not ready.

C: Why do you think that?

A: I don’t want to spill my guts to a stranger. Not when there’s someone who deserves it more

C: Deserves what? Your anger or your feelings?

A: My anger

C: So tell that person

A: I don't know where he is

C: So find him. I doubt your ex-husband was like some CIA type

A: Lol, no but I don’t think I’m ready to talk to him either

C: Do you ever think you’ll be ready?

A: I’m not sure

C: I think you’re thinking about it too much. Honestly, therapy should be for you and no one else. If you aren’t ready you won’t do anything but waste your money because you’ll fight everything at every turn. Nothing penetrates if you aren’t ready to hear it. And even if the therapist does happen to get through to you, it will not give you the closure that you’re seeking. The questions you want answers to, only your ex-husband can answer

A: I hate that you’re right.

C: Lol, there’s a lot of trauma that influences this rightness

A: Unfortunately. How are you? Was rude of me not to ask that first

C: You had something important to say, no worries. I’m fine. I was talking to my daughter and she wants a puppy

A: What kind?

C: Not sure yet. We’re gonna do some research before we make a decision

A: That’s good. I’ve had a lot of puppies be sent to my shelter because people didn’t pick the right dog for their lifestyle

C: That must suck. Do you have any pets?

A: No, I’m not home enough

C: Ah, understandable

A: would the puppy be your first pet?

C: No, I had a dog when I was a child but in my old profession, me and my ex were never home enough, it was always something with either my job or hers

A: That’s understandable.

C: You ready for your gala?

A: Physically? Yes. Emotionally? No. I’m working on convincing myself not to cancel

C: Is it really that hard?

A: Yes but I made a promise to my employees and stuff so I really do want to honor that

C: Do you need another incentive?

A: Depends on what you’re suggesting

C: How about a gift? Just for your effort of going to this event

A: And how am I supposed to get said gift?

C: I can mail it. Do you have a secure mailing address you would like me to send it to?

Robyn thought about her random PO Box that she uses when she doesn’t want to give out her work or home address.

A: PO Box 124, New York, NY 10003. Do I get to know what the gift is beforehand?

C: Nope. I’ll send it and make sure it arrives the morning of your gala. Think that’ll work?

A: I guess but I’m nervous about what it could be

C: You’ll see

A: And do you have a secure mailing address?

C: PO Box 762, Middletown, NY 10940

A: Upstate. Do you travel to the city every day or?

C: No, I have a condo near Columbia. I stay during the week then go home on the weekends.

A: How many hours of a drive?

C: Actually like 2 hours. It gives me some peace from the loud city life and gives my daughter some balance.

A: What’s it like up there?

C: Very spacious. I live in a somewhat rural part of Middletown. I have a couple acres of land surrounding my house.

A: I can’t even imagine what that would look like. Even when I lived in California, I was in the busiest part.

C: I think I appreciate it because I’m older now. I definitely enjoyed living in the city when I was in Cali

A: It holds a beautiful sense of excitement

C: Do you live near your business or far away?

A: I have an apartment nearby but I might start looking for a house soon. Maybe renovate a brownstone

C: That’s always a good deal. Would you rent out?

A: Nah. I don’t have the energy to keep up with being a landlord. It’s a job within itself

C: Very true.

A: I’m guessing you should be going, is your daughter school age?

C: She goes to a headstart program at a private school since she’s only 3 but they keep her until around 5 in aftercare. I usually have a late class today but I canceled it

A: Oh. Is something wrong?

C: No, I’d just rather not be out and about this evening.

A: Ah. Well thanks for talking with me. I got an appointment coming in soon

C: Anything major?

A: Nope. Just a check up

C: Well if you have time, I’d love to talk to you again

A: Talk or chat?

C: Talk

A: My clinic closes at 7 so I should be home by 8

C; And dinner?

A: I’ll probably grab something on the way home

C: So how about a dinner date then? We’ll eat and keep each other company

A: I’d like that

C: Great. See you at 8

A: See you at 8

Robyn closed her app then rested her head on her desk. She was drained.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So what color is her dress? Jessica asked as she and Chris stood in the florist shop.

“It’s navy blue.”

“I think this corsage would be perfect. It’s simple, elegant and can be pinned to the dress instead of being situated on her wrist.”

Chris walked over the piece his sister was referring to. It contained a navy blue rose, a white rose and some baby breaths, “I like that one.”

“Do they deliver to PO Boxes?”

“Yea, that’s why I picked this shop and it’s fairly close to the Post Office where her PO Box is.”

“Why didn’t you just get her work address?”

“The whole point is to be strangers. Giving me her work address would defeat that purpose. She’s an established vet, I could probably look up her work address and find her, which, again, defeats the point.”

“Do you know what she looks like?”

“Not really. Her photo was a full body shot so the closer you zoom in the blurrier it gets. Same as mine.”

“And that doesn’t worry you? What if she’s ugly?”

Chris laughed, “what does that matter? We don’t ever plan on meeting each other.

Besides I’m not allowed to be nice to a possibly physically unattractive woman?

“You know that’s not what I’m saying. It’s just- I don’t understand this whole online dating thing”

“There’s nothing to understand because we’re not dating.”

“Yea. Right.”

“We are both in rebuilding stages of our lives and we like talking to each other. That’s all. If I was interested in more, I’d definitely would’ve insisted on meeting her or just moved on by now.”

“You told her about your nervous breakdown and suicide attempt. You haven’t even told your ex-wife that and you want me to believe you’re not dating.”

“Yes because we aren’t.”

“You’re buying her gifts?”

“I buy my friends gifts all the time.”

“You told her about Anesa.”

“And?”

“You talk almost everyday.”

“I’m not seeing your point.”

“My point is you’re dating this woman.”

“Jessica, big sister, I am not dating anyone. I like her, yes but that’s as far as it goes. I need a friend and she’s one for me. That’s it. That’s all.”

“You are so in denial, Chris.”

“I’ve accepted my situation, you’re the one with the conspiracy theories.”

“I’m just saying, I don’t want an ugly sister in law especially not after my last one. She was gorgeous and the point is to upgrade not backslide.”

“You get on my nerves, Jess.”

Jessica laughed, “is this all you’re getting for your friend?”

“Just because you said it like that, I am returning you home and finishing this adventure by myself.”

“Come on, don’t be like that Little Brother.”

“Then stop making this a bigger deal than what it is.”

This was definitely a big deal. Robyn stared at the box of things Chris had delivered to her PO Box and her heart melted a bit. The flower corsage with navy and white roses was beautiful. She loved the card that came attached but what shook her was the books he had gifted. One night they had stayed up talking about literature and she mentioned that she loved poetry but never had the time to really build up a collection. Wrapped with a red bow were two compilations of black poets. The note under the bow stated, “I’d like to contribute the first books to your poetry collection. It’s always good to start with the essentials (smile).”

Robyn grabbed one of the books and sat down in a chair just as Leandra walked in with her hairstylist beside her.

“What’s all this?” Leandra asked.

“My friend sent me a gift.”

“Your online friend?”

“Yes.”

“Wow, he must really like you.”

“I like him too.”

“Did you send something back?”

“I just got this, this morning so I’m still thinking.”

“How’d he get your address?”

“He doesn't have it. I gave him my PO Box.”

“Oh your stalker box.”

“Don’t start, Lele.”

“So how you feel?”

“I’m ok. I still don’t wanna go.”

“Girl, I ain’t talking about this stupid ass gala. How do you feel about Chris?”

“What am I supposed to feel? I really love the gifts but that’s it”

“I’m looking at your face and it’s more than that.”

“He got me poetry books.”

“What? You found someone to indulge your weird ass literature taste.”

“Look, just because you only like sex books doesn’t make my taste weird. I am cultured.”

“I have a master’s degree too so save it. How’d he know to get that?”

“We had a conversation about books and I told him I always wanted to start a collection of poetry but never had the time nor knew where to start and I guess he remembered.”

“What made him send you a gift?”

“It was a little joke about how he could get me to not back out of the gala. I honestly wasn’t expecting him to go through with it but he did.”

“A man who keeps his word. He really likes you.”

“I know.”

“So...still never gonna meet him in person?”

“That was never part of the deal.”

Leandra groaned as she flopped down on the couch, “are you at least gonna get some from somebody at this gala?”

“Ewww….no. I’m staying at most an hour then coming back home.”

“Have you talked to Chris?”

“Not today.”

“Do you only chat on the app?”

“Yea.”

“Oh.”

“Why?”

“I thought you would’ve gotten his phone number by now.”

“Nah, that’s too personal. I wouldn’t give my number to someone I haven’t met yet.”

“So meet him.”

“No.”

“Ugh….you get on my nerves, Robyn.”

Robyn laughed, “what’s your plans for tonight?”

“Getting the baby from his father and going home.”

“How is my nephew?”

“He’s good.”

“And his father?”

“Still alive, unfortunately.”

“Don’t do Max like that.”

“He gets on my nerves.”

“How?”

“He keeps asking me if we’re getting back together.”

“Aww...Lele, he still loves you.”

“That’s not my problem.”

“And you still love him too. You always playing hard to get.”

“Ch….I am hard to get. Thank you very much.”

“Is that why y’all keep going on vacations together?”

“If a man wants to take me to Puerto Rico or Costa Rica free of charge, who am I to say no?”

Robyn laughed, “Lord, what are we gonna do with you?”

“Love me, duh.”

Leandra stayed until Robyn was ready to leave for the gala. As she climbed into the back of car, she grabbed her phone

A: Hey stranger

A few minutes passed before she received an answer.

C: Hey. How are you?

A: I’m great. On my way to the gala

C: Still decided against an escort?

A: Yea. Besides, I don’t plan on staying there long.

C: Ah ok

A: So….thank you for the gifts. The corsage is perfect for my dress

C: You’re very welcome. My sister helped me pick that out.

A: Tell her I said thank you

C: I will

A: So what are you up to?

C; Laundry and grading work

A: What’s the task this week?

C: Students had to craft an original piece of music modeled after a piece they enjoy so I’ve been listening to music tracks all day

A: How’s it sounding?

C: I’ve gotten a few good ones but what passes for music and what these students are modeling their pieces after is awful.

A: That bad?

C: Some of these songs just can’t find a key and then when I listen to their reference tracks, I understand why. Music production has gotten so lazy over the years

A: You think so?

C: I’m gonna send you the best one I’ve heard and the worst one and tell me what you think

A: I’m getting homework now too, Professor

C: Lol. I just want you to hear what I’m dealing with

A: Send it. I’ll get back to you when I can

C: No rush. I’ll be home all weekend with this.

A: Cool. How’s the puppy search going?’

C: Good. We’ve narrowed it down to three puppies. I told her she has one week to pick one and then we’ll find a place to buy it.

A: As a shelter owner, please try and get a shelter dog. So many of them are good dogs that were in bad situations.

C: I will keep that in mind.

A: That’s all I ask

C: So what’s your plans after the gala?

A: Home.

C: Up for a video chat?’

A: Absolutely. I kinda miss your automated voice

C: Lol Same here

A: Anything else going on

C: Nope. I live a rather simple life.

A: Is that a good thing or a bad thing?

C: To be honest, I’m not quite sure

A: Something giving you doubts

C: My daughter told me she feels sad for me

A: Aww...why?

C: Because I’m alone. It’s kinda hard to explain to a three year old the difference between alone and lonely

A: Lol true but then don’t explain with words, show her with actions. She probably thinks you don’t have a life and for children, they haven’t commanded the power and beauty of peace and stillness. They still have so much they haven’t explored

C: You have a point

A: Honestly, if you find things to do when she’s not around, she’ll probably feel a bit better about you

C: I’ll have to find me a new hobby then

A: What’s your current hobby?

C: I don’t really have one to be honest. My job involves music now so it’s not really a hobby anymore

A: It could be, it’s not like you make music for your class, do you?

C: Not recently

A; Do you sing, play instruments? What?

C: I have a decent voice but I play the piano, the guitar, and can do alright by the saxophone

A: What type of music do you prefer to play?

C: Nothing like an old school soul song. I love playing Sade records on the sax

A: I might have to compel you to play for me one day

C: I would offer to play tonight but my instruments are in storage

A: No rush. It’s just a thought

C: I’d love to play for you though

A: You making me feel inadequate

C: In what way?

A: The gifts. The music offers. Doesn’t feel like we’re on even footing

C: Well only you know what you have to offer. Find what works. I’m always open for gifts or moments

A: I’m gonna have to think of something. Thank you for the poetry books by the way. It’s a good start of a collection

C: The classics are always your best bet

A: I’m a little surprised you remembered

C: Why?

A: It was such an odd conversation and it was late when we had it, surely you wouldn’t have remembered it

C: That’s a weird assumption. If there is one thing I’ve learned from being married, it’s learning to listen just as much as you like to talk. Reciprocity is the key.

A: Very true.

C: Are you at the gala yet?

A: Just pulled up

C: Well I hope you have a good night for however long you are there

A: I hope they do the award ceremony first so I can get my award and leave

C: If I gotta try and find a life, you need to live yours. You never know you may enjoy the time

A: We’ll see. Talk to you later

C: Later

#chrianna #loveisblindfanfiction

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devourer--of--books · 5 years ago

Text

So, I just started to play Obey Me! Shall We Date

And well, I have thoughts

Im currently stuck on the first levels of lesson 5, so my knowledge of the plot is limited to that + some spoilers I accidentally got while going though the obey me! tag. Do I have a deep understanding of this game? No. Am I gonna rant anyway? Yeah. See me do another one of these soon after I play it some more, but for now, I need to put this out there:

First, mechanics-wise, the first thing on my mind was "Mr. Love from Hell", which is honestly not too far fetched. Maybe it's because I'm playing in my old ass tablet (I need a new phone, this thing ain't gonna survive 2020) but it's just so slow??? I've tried downloading full data, and it kinda helped, but still, it just annoys me so much! It's not crashing like crazy (cof cof Love Island The Game cof cof) but it could be better, it takes forever to get the itens to level up cards because it just ????????? takes forever for them to load???? anyone else got this problem or it's just my device? Anyway, that aside, I quite like it, if you played MLQC, it's pretty easy to manage, and while it takes a bit more of attention to win battles, I think that's a good thing. Getting shards has a been a bitch, like, I keep on suffering with the loading and my competitive ass wants to finish begginer's missions, and again I think Mr. Love has spoiled me. Also, someone please tell me how to level up skills, because I have no idea???

Now, moving on to the actual tea: what do I think of these boys?

Let's go in order, shall we:

So, I open the app and I see Lucifer in all his red and black glory, furry cape, Dom-Daddy, Big D Energy for days and go "Oh, Demon!Nobunaga, fun!". I'm immediately drawn to him beacause Nobu was my first ever otome guy and while I eventually grew out of the whole "this man is so controlling and sexy and dark" phase, nostalgia ya know? So, turns out the vibe I keep getting from Lucifer is more like all those dark-kinky-Jumin-Han-fanfics (as in, the only parts of Jumin Han that I hate) rather than Nobu? Idk man, this guy just seems shady?? They all do honestly but Lucifer is just plain scary. Dude, I know you've got the whole "most-powerful-oldest-control-freak" going for you but, like, can you chill?

Yet I can't really blame him, cause, Veronica (that's my MC's name) why, girl???? She be going up those stairs, and I'm just ??? Real talk, I'm kinda of a rule follower? I don't wanna make this guy mad, man, all I wanna do is hit on Satan (which we shall discuss soon) and see some family drama shenanigans. Lucifer says "don't go up those stairs" I'd be like "okay???" because up until now he hasn't given me a reason to not trust him (aside from being shady)??? But I have no choice but go talk to Belphegor (don't even get me started on this one) and I can just tell I'm gonna get in trouble for this. Could I not get there accidentally? Do I have to go there against Lucifer's direct orders? I don't think this is gonna go well, I just don't wanna get on his bad side hskshskshk

Lucifer's room, however, is everything to me, the deco is lovely (skeleton aside) and that bed, maaaannnn

Mammon started really annoying but he's been growing on me. I have a soft spot for dumb bitches like him, I guess? He just cracks me up? Not to be cheesy, but I like him as a friend? Maybe that'll change in the future, who knows, but for now that's how I see him, the best friend guy who is gonna be in love with you in every single route (read, Seven, but dumber). Can't wait for the angst. Looks wise I kind got him mixed with Solomon at some point (my dumbass though it was a bug) but all those Surprise Guest moments have me thinking he's way cuter than I gave him credit for at first.

I always feel bad for ratting him out to Lucifer, but boy, you and Veronica practically share one single brain cell, okay? I need to get my girl into Lucifer's good graces, I ain't about that troublemaker life

Levi is gonna be brief: No. He's not my type (otome or real life wise) and he annoys me. He reminded me a bit of Yoosung at first, and I'm trying to power though it like I did with him, but I can't. He keeps dragging me into his stuff and it's not cute, it makes me resent Levi. I'm not much of a tsundere enthusiast by nature, and I really don't like when they portray fans and gamers in this kinda "I'm weird, look at me I'm so weird and different" light ("have you ever seen me without this stupid hat on? that's weird" jsjdndmsksjdnsmskdjnddm). It comes across (to me at least) as childish and dumb (not endearing dumb, like Mammon). Idk, maybe I'll change my mind? Don't come for me, Levi stans

So Satan

I love Satan

Otome makes you say the strangest shit hm

Still. I haven't interacted much with him but I'm obsessed with this man. Let me date you, okay? You look like posh book-cat-candle super model I wish existed. Let's be petty together. Since I haven't been playing long I hope I don't end up regretting putting my heart and soul into loving you. I'm doing all kinds of jobs to get intimacy go up with him, because guyghbkhiugiygufgfydddyghvjgvjg I'm all about that soft dom energy he has going for him, it's basically everything I love about Jumin Ham, but less CEO and more cute-bookstore-guy. Ideally, Satan is 100% my type, even if not the usual otome route I take first. Also, he is the Avatar of Wrath, which, along with Pride, is my most prominent sin, so I might be projecting

Pls babe don't turn out to be terrible

Kay, so Asmo. Asmo gives me all the Shingen vibes but realistic Shingen. Like, of Shingen is all about worshiping his MC, Asmo looks like he wants to be worshiped himself. Not judging, tho. That thing he said about loving himself above all things, I feel like it was supposed to be shady but I kinda agree? He's onto something. All this self-sacrifing thing is so romanticized. Can't we all be in healthy non co-dependent relationships? Love yourselves, kids. Which is why, while I said Satan is my ideal type of man, in real life, most of the people I've been with are Asmos. That being said, that's why he doesn't really work as an otome LI for me (at least for now). I'm here to live a fantasy of dating demons, not to see my exes. He is tempting tho. Who doesn't want a friend to do face masks and fuck from time to time, no strings attached until, "oh no, we both caught feelings, whatever shall we do" and then have it end well? (can you tell I'm projecting? my therapist is gonna love this). Poor Asmo, it's not his fault. Darling I'm sure you'll turn out to be lovely

On Beel, not much. I'm not into him, at least for now. his personality so far is that he's hungry. So what, man. I'm not here for that either. I don't find food particularly fun or sexy, it's just here to keep us alive (unless it's sweets, sweets are the best, but I'm having to cut down on sweets so), so he's not doing much for me. Gotta wait for that character development I guess

And to end this rant, Belphegor. Bitch, I've seen you on my demon cards, don't you dare tell Veronica you're human. But she's a dumb hoe, my girl Veronica, so she just doesn't question it???? I swear, this girl. Shady doesn't even cut it with him. Sorry, you're telling me what to do? Dude, lol, you're lucky this is Veronica and not me, because I'd be out of there as soon as you started this bull about me doing pacts with demons to get your ass out of that room. Don't prey on my empathy, it pisses me off. Spoilers tell me he's like a human-hater or something? Boy, fuck you, okay? Am I going to end up loving him? Who knows. For now he can rot in that room for all I care

Anyway, that's pretty much my first impressions of this game. I'll be playing it for some more time, until I get up to date on lessons and story or until colleges comes to drag me to literal hell, whatever comes first

Peace, my dudes

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