#(she doesnt have a car too so maybe we could go together)
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uhgg coworkers dinner tomorrow. they decided to go in a place thats like 30m by car from mine (we live in a pretty small city and im in a town connected to it so it's not that little time. most places would took me 15m at max. so i cant even ride a bike) and i dont have a car because we have 1 in family and it broke. so im gonna have to ask one of them to. give me a ride 🙂 but i dont want to say no. i have to grind the "good workplace enviroment" because if i dont it wont ever feel *okay* to work.
i was talking with my brother and he was complaining about the daughter of the owner of his job. he said he doesnt like her because "she's lunatic, one day she's your best friend, one day she doesnt even talk to you" and i realized im probably that one person at work. i talk when i want which is not every time.
is it that bad in the eyes of the majority of people?? i never really realized it. i even though that it was good that sometimes we talk because i wouldnt talk to them like. ever. theyre so so bland and talk about boys, ibiza, clubbing or shitalking people they know (and i dont). i tried to make friends so i ask aboht them about these things and listening. i talk about me too. but i really dont care. its not a friendship that gives me anything excpt for not feeling like highschool freak when we work.
i dont get it. what do this kind of people want? they dont include you in their talk but if you dont force yourself in them youre a lunatic. so you either suffer from being excluded or suffer from looking desperate to talk to them
this rly brings me back to highschool. uhg. i havent experienced this in a few years because i guess i surrounded myself with people way different from them. good
#uhg#i wished i had a car#also#it not even a serious job we only work 1 full day a week.#why do we have to have a dinner together#+ my girl ex best friend will be there#its ok between us but it still makes me stressed#but there is her#you know that one video of the 2 exs talking together and its like#“when the inside jokes are still there”#and they laugh and then realize theyre not together anymore#shitting crying#but we will be ok when we're there. ill just feel like shit after i get home#(she doesnt have a car too so maybe we could go together)#shes not my ex girlfriend. but i really loved her in a sisterly way...#weve been roomates for 2 years before we had our stupid fight#ill write about her another time#i already did#but not very clearly#it would help me
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kid megumi and gojo definitely took bubble baths together while megumi washes his hair and satoru's just yapping about how much he loves reader
“megumi,” gojo says, not even bothering to knock on the door.
it’s the boys fault, really, for leaving it open in the first place.
megumi stills, brows furrowing as his hands stop foaming the soap in his hair. “gojo?” he asks, a bit disbelieving.
he might be going crazy—it’s not uncommon for sorcerers. and megumi barely thought he would make it to fourteen and here he is, so. he should probably tell someone about the hallucinations but—
“you got it,” gojo answers, predictably, sitting on the toilet seat. “i need to talk to you.”
megumi peaks his head around the shower curtain slowly, blinking a few times to make sure the man is really there.
but he is, grinning at the tiny bit of megumi he can see, tapping his fingers on his knees obnoxiously.
megumi points a hand towards the door. “this is an invasion of privacy.”
“megumi,” gojo gives him a bland look. “i’ve seen you naked.”
“that’s creepy.”
gojo sighs, hanging his head. “we’ve known each other for so long now, and you still don’t trust me.”
“you still haven’t given me a reason to. can’t this wait? or not happen? i don’t want to talk to you.”
yes, megumi is still hanging halfway out of the shower. yes, his hair is dripping water on the floor. no, he does not care—it’s gojo’s house anyway. he can fix the ruined floorboards.
“it’s about your mother.”
at that megumi blinks. “what’d you do?“
“i didn’t do anything.”
“are you sure?”
“yes, i’m sure,” gojo scoffs, reaching out to pull his ear—which megumi expertly deflects (he almost slips and dies in the process). “am i crying on the floor right now?”
megumi considers it. then he recalls the last time you and gojo had a fight. he had to check gojo’s pulse every time he walked past the couch.
“good point. what is it?”
“as you know, her birthday is coming up—“
“are you serious?”
“megumi.” gojo’s eyes are dubious, his voice is disapproving. “your mothers birthday is very important.”
megumi rolls his eyes. “i know. i mean, are you seriously asking me about this right now? im in the shower. there’s shampoo in my hair.”
gojo nods very seriously. “it’s the only place she won’t hear.”
“she’s not even home.”
“she’s hidden cameras, megumi, i know it.”
“no she hasn’t.”
gojo pouts. “i want it to be a surprise. she always finds out about her gifts before i can give them to her.”
“that’s because you tell her.”
“the suspense is too much. i need you to buy her something for me and hide it so i don’t know what it is.”
he sounds absolutely serious, which might be the worst part of that request, actually.
and when has megumi ever done gojo a favor?
“gojo,” megumi gives him a little smirk, tilting his head. “i’m not doing that.”
gojo groans, falling onto the floor. “c’mon, megumi, we’re supposed to be friends.”
“you’re my teacher, if anything.”
“and your father,” he juts his chin, “favoritism is not cute.”
“good.”
megumi finally turns around. gojo was never going to leave, even if he’d attempted to tackle him out of the door.
and he’s used to this, anyway. there hasn’t been a day in seven years that he’s gotten some peace.
“okay,” gojo begins again, sounding like he’s won—which he hasn’t. “i was thinking some jewelry, but you know how picky she is. and besides, she’s too rough for something small. tsumiki is already getting her that chibi mug we saw in that corner store last weekend, and whatever you’re getting is off of the table too.”
“i’m not listening to this.”
“i could take her out to dinner, but that’s not a gift. and i do that anyway. maybe i should buy her a car—what kind do you think she’d like? something blue, like my eyes—“
megumi groans.
gojo pauses. “did you get soap in your eye?”
honestly, banging his head against the wall might be better than this. at least they have pain killers at the hospital.
megumi doesnt answer, no longer entertaining this, but gojo continues anyway.
“maybe we should re-do the bathroom, you know how she’s always saying that—“
god, when will it end?
#megumi is too old by the time they meet to need gojo’s help i think#but gojo on the other hand#gojo x reader#a typical family#gojo satoru x reader#gojo satoru#gojo satoru x you#gojo satoru x y/n#gojo x you#satoru gojo x reader#jjk gojo#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#satoru gojo x you#satoru gojo x y/n#satoru x reader#jjk fanfic#gojo x y/n#satoru x you#jjk fluff#jjk x you
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civil war | hanni
summary ; you don't know how to function without expressing your disdain for each other, but sometimes all you need is to share a drink to bring peace.
pairing ; hanni pham x fem!reader
content ; non idol!au, enemies to lovers…?, mild jealousy, lame insults, hanni doesnt like yn's outfits, yn and hanni are annoying
genre ; fluff
word count ; 4075
not even 10 seconds in and the two of you were already going at it.
“goofy outfit, bro.” hanni comments as you finally arrive at the café you all agreed to eat at. you raised your eyebrow at her, scoffing. “i know you’re not talking with that hair.”
“i’m trying something NEW. maybe you should too!” she fought back, crossing her arms and turning away from you. “we’ve been here together for approximately 5 seconds and you’re already at it. i’m genuinely amazed. how are we a function friend group?” minji complains, the look of disbelief clear on her face. danielle laughed, wrapping her arms around you and hanni. “it’s gonna be a fun day! brighten up, everyone! we’re gonna eat good, have good conversations and so much more!”
“unnie, yn and hanni will kill each other before any of that happens.” hyein butts in as she eyes the desserts on display. “so not true! what do you think, haerin?” dani asks, catching the younger girl off guard. haerin slowly turns to look at her and blinks. “mm.”
“exactly! thank you! now let’s eat and have fun, yes?”
“yes..” you all replied. you looked over to see hanni glaring at you, causing a laugh to escape your throat. you stuck your tongue out at her and let dani drag you to a table.
“why can’t you just be a normal person and wear a normal outfit?”
“how is this not a normal outfit?”
“you’re just not normal.”
“do you think you’re funny?”
“i’m funnier than you.”
“im taller than you.”
“who fucking asked you?”
“i–”
“no one asked! next!” hanni interrupts, taking a huge bite out of her bread roll menacingly. “i hope you choke.” you replied, kicking her under the table earning a muffled yelp. you laughed as you watched her aggressively chew, clearly wanting to say something back at you. “apapap! unnie, calm down, you might actually choke.” she looked at danielle and defeatedly obeyed. she looked up, sending you a glare. a small smile couldn't help but spread across your face as you watched her cheeks full of bread move up and down. you couldn’t deny that hanni was cute. even at times when you found her absolutely insufferable, you still found her adorable. but that was something you’d take to the grave.
“...party and she invited us.”
the girls all began to agree with minji’s words but you were too caught up in your own world to listen. “wait, wait. what? sorry, i zoned out.”
“i said wonyoung is throwing a party tomorrow and she invited us. but i think there will be drinks there? you comfortable with that, hyein? we would take care of you!”
“please. it’s a party thrown by wonyoung unnie, of course there are drinks. besides, i’ve been friends with you guys for so long, i think i’m comfortable around alcohol.” she replied, rolling her eyes. minji laughed at her, bumping her shoulder. “okay, big girl. you down, y/n?” you nodded excitedly, “yeah! should be fun.”
“hanni? dani? haerin?”
“i’m down!” danielle cheers. “me too.”
“hanni?” minji asks again. “oh, uh, yeah. sure, i’m down.” she muttered, sending minji a small smile. “great! i’ll let her know.” and you all easily found yourselves lost in another silly conversation, but your eyes never left hanni. you could tell something was off but you weren’t close enough to push. if you asked you were certain she would just tell you to go away, so you decided to stay safe and just.. wonder from afar.
you got into minji’s car, greeting everyone excitedly. hyein was in the passenger seat and haerin was sitting on dani’s lap behind them. “we should start taking my family car when we all go out.” hyein suggested, causing minji to laugh. “my car is perfectly fine!”
“you’re not drinking tonight, min?” you asked. “nah, gotta take care of this big baby.” hyein groaned and started arguing with minji about how she wasn’t a baby and that she was perfectly capable of taking care of herself. minji simply laughed and let the younger girl yap until they reached hanni’s house. she opened the door and stopped her movements as she laid her eyes on you. “these damn outfits, y/n. i want to laugh, but i just feel bad.”
“can we leave her, please? i’m begging.”
“hi hanni unnie! please get in!”
she hesitantly gets in next to you and shuts the door. you awkwardly tried to shuffle further away, but it was no use. with the two girls next to you, you had no space to go anyway. you tried to remain respectful and leave a little gap between the two of you, but it just meant you squeezed in closer to the other two.
minji made an abrupt turn causing everyone in the car to move with it. you were pressed against hanni as she grabbed your arm to prevent herself from flying away. “shit, sorry everyone! that car came out of nowhere.”
“unnie, we’re not even there yet and you’re already trying to kill us!” hyein yelled.
“ow.” haerin mumbled, rubbing her head. “you okay, rin?” dani asked, getting a nod in response. you felt some pressure on your arm and saw that hanni had still been holding onto it. “you good?” you asked quietly. her eyes widened as she realised and quickly let go of you, “um, yeah. i.. don’t talk about it.” she turned away to face the window and you laughed at her antics.
“holy shit, where the hell am i supposed to park? the whole street is full?”
with a scoff, hyein crosses her arms. “of course the entirety of seoul is here, it’s wonyoung unnie’s party.”
“unnie, there! free spot there!” dani directed, minji quickly driving to secure the spot. it took a few minutes.. with hyein yelling, dani trying to help, you and hanni quietly arguing about God knows what and haerin just.. listening to everything.
you all eagerly made your way to wonyoung’s house – mansion? castle? either works! there were already heaps of people in her front yard, walking into her house was another level. there were seas of people, some familiar, some not. you looked around and saw a dj up on a stage-like area, wonyoung knew how to throw parties.
you made your way through the huge crowds, searching for your friends. stepping foot into the kitchen, you see wonyoung, yujin and rei chatting with other people. wonyoung looked up and squealed as she saw you. her face lit up as she ran towards all of you, giving you all a hug. “you came! i’m so happy! i’ve missed you guys! it was only supposed to be a small gathering, but people bring people and those people bring people and you know how it goes.”
“i can imagine, looks great though! very lively!” dani exclaims, excited by the atmosphere. “thank you! the snacks and drinks are over there and hyein! there’s a bunch of juice! if there’s anything else you need, please just come looking for me! have fun you guys, i’ll call you when we start playing games.”
you all thanked her and made your way towards the snack table. “who’s drinking, raise your hand.” minji said (yelled) over the music. dani and you raised your hands, high fiving in the process. you and dani poured yourselves some drinks and made your way back to your friends. hyein was dancing with minji, haerin and hanni, making the both of you smile. “they’re cute.” you stated, sipping your drink. “yeah, they are! let’s dance!” dani giggled as she dragged you to the dance floor where your other friends were.
after a few songs, you started to get tired. you stepped away from your group and went to get a sip of water. you looked around and saw a familiar figure outside on the patio. you curiously made your way outside, startling said familiar figure.
“hanni?”
“what are you doing here?” she asked, turning back to look away from you. you shut the sliding door and sat down next to her. “i.. just saw you out here. i didn’t realise you left, are you okay?”
she nodded, “yeah, it was just.. loud. i’m okay. you can go back inside.” you thought about it for a second and decided to stay put. she looked at you with confusion on her face, “i said you can go back inside.” you shook your head and looked up at the sky. “nah, i’m good here.”
hanni opened her mouth to say something else but chose to keep it to herself after she saw how content you looked next to her. she cleared her throat, not knowing how to start a conversation with you. insulting you didn’t seem very fitting in this setting so she didn’t know what to do. “we can just sit in silence, don’t be weird.” you spoke, amusement clear in your voice. “whatever, i’m just trying not to make it awkward.”
“it’s only awkward if you make it awkward.” she blinked at you a few times before looking back up at the sky. she took a deep breath in and closed her eyes. you turned to look at her and couldn’t help but smile. she glowed in the moonlight and when she opened them, you saw stars in her eyes.
“wanna go for a walk?” you regretted it as soon as you opened your mouth. you were certain she was going to laugh at you and throw a childish insult at you. but much to your surprise, she stood up and said, “let’s go.”
you stared at her with shock on your face, quickly standing up and taking your phone out to let minji know. you walked along wonyoung’s neighbourhood, quietly rating each house you walked by. the streetlights weren’t too bright, but weren’t too dim. they gave off the perfect light it reflected clearly on hanni’s face.
“you know, if you weren’t such an asshole - i would be able to say you look pretty without regretting it.”
you heard hanni’s breath hitch next to you, quickly coughing to cover it up. “what happened to being in silence?” she snapped back, trying to hide the fact that she was turning red. “i just called you pretty, can’t you be decent for once and just say thank you?” you retorted, rolling your eyes.
“it- i-.. thank you..” she defeatedly whispered. “see, was that so hard?” she muttered a snarky reply under her breath, but she was extremely flustered. you just watched her for a few seconds, genuinely taken aback by her beauty. you held no hatred for the girl next to you, in fact it was the opposite. you wouldn’t lie and say you were never hurt by the things she said. most times you genuinely had no idea whether or not she actually hated you or this was just her way of communicating with you. like.. it was your thing? but curiosity is strong and sometimes people need answers.
“hanni?” you began, kicking a rock on the path. she hummed in response, looking down at the ground. “do you actually dislike me?” you asked, still avoiding eye contact. “oh.” was all she could let out. she turned to look at you and felt guilty as soon as she saw the look on your face. of course she didn't hate you, she definitely wasn’t good at showing that but dislike was the last thing she felt for you.
“you’ve always argued with me and insulted me, so i reciprocated the energy. i thought it was just banter, but we never seemed to get past it. come to think of it, this is probably the closest thing we’ve had to a proper conversation.”
her demeanor softened, voice laced with guilt. “no, i don’t dislike you. i just thought you didn’t like me either.” she said, eyes glued to the floor.
“i’ve always liked you but with the way you treated me, i knew i didn’t have a chance.”
“no, it– wait what?” she froze and stopped in her tracks, “a chance?”
“yeah–oh, i see how this can be misinterpreted.” you responded, standing next to her. “oh, you mean like.. have a chance to be friends with me?”
“no.. i mean have a chance with you.” you clarified, leaving hanni dumbfounded. “what?”
“i mean, even with the way you treat me - i see how you treat others. i know you’re a good and kind person, i guess being pretty helps as well, but you’re funny and you care for others. i see how funny you are, how you care for our friends, i know you have a nice voice. you help take care of hyein, you look out for haerin, you help minji out when she feels overwhelmed with everything, you and dani are a great pair and– ”
“– you like me?” she interrupts, eyes almost popping out of her eye sockets.
you tilted your head at her, “yes..?”
“how?” “erm.. did i not just explain?”
“how are you acting like this isn’t a big deal?” hanni screeched, throwing her head into her hands, “we’ve spent years shitting on each other and you’re saying you’ve liked me this entire time?!” her voice went up an octave with every word. you quickly shushed her with your hands, trying to prevent the entire neighbourhood from hearing her, “hanni, it doesn’t have to be a big deal! i didn’t tell you because i expected anything, i just wanted to share my side of things. i like you, so i’ve just followed your lead. if arguing and insulting is what you’re comfortable, then i’m alright with that.”
she shook her head, chuckling almost bitterly at your words. “y/n, i’ve always known you to be a sarcastic person, so i’ve only been acting like this towards you because i thought this was what you wanted.”
she took a deep breath in, taking a step closer to you. “y/n, the truth is i–”
the sound of your ringtone cut her off, taking you both by surprise. you pulled your phone out of your pocket to see minji’s name displayed in big letters. “it’s–i’m sorry. give me a second.” you apologised, answering the call. “minji?”
hanni cleared her throat and took a step back, staring down at the ground. all she needed was 2 more seconds. minji’s timing was impeccable. all she wanted to do was laugh at the absurdity of it all, but all she could muster up was the fact that she felt defeated.
“oh, yeah, alright. we’re coming. okay, see you.” the call ended and you turned to hanni, “we have to go. haerin’s not feeling well.” hanni nodded and followed you as you turned to walk back to wonyoung’s house. “wait, sorry, i interrupted you earlier. you were saying something..?” you reminded, turning to her. her head was down and her shoulders were slumped, you couldn't help but wonder if this was because of what you told her.
“huh? oh.. no.. it’s nothing. it doesn’t matter.” she mumbled, almost whispering. “are you sure? you can tell me anything, i won’t be offended.” you reassured. you wanted to hear what she felt about.. how you felt. you were almost getting to her, opening up to each other. “yeah, i’m sure. don’t worry about it. let’s just get back to them so we can take care of haerin.”
you slowly blinked at her before nodding. “hanni, i hope what i told you doesn’t change anything. or if i does, i hope we can at least be civil with each other.” she sent you a soft smile and replied, “of course.” with that, you were content. and you were a step closer to being friends.
you reached wonyoung’s house shortly, grabbing hanni’s arm to run towards minji’s car in the distance. “is haerin okay?” you asked immediately.
they explained that she had snacked too much and needed to rest. the ride back home was.. awkward to say the least. you and hanni didn’t say a word to each other, looking in opposite directions. you felt as if you had screwed everything up until you felt her move next to you. she subtly shuffled closer to you, making your shoulders and knees touch. your entire body stiffened, startled by the sudden contact.
it was all you could think about when you got home, that and hanni sending you a smile when she got dropped off. she made your heart flutter with the smallest gestures and you could only imagine how she’d make you feel once you were actually friends. you went to sleep that night with a content heart.
a few days after the party, you all agreed to meet up again to try out a new café. you rushed to get ready in hopes that hanni would arrive early again. you reached the café half an hour before the initial plan, eagerly searching for the australian girl.your shoulders slumped when you realised you were the first to arrive. you grudgingly went to find a table big enough to seat all of you. you wanted to sulk, but you never made an arrangement with hanni. in fact, you haven’t spoken to her since the party. you sat there, busy arguing with yourself that you didn’t even realise someone had walked into the café.
a sweet voice snapped you out of your thoughts, “hi.”
“oh.” you began, feeling your heart race as you saw her face. “hanni, hi. you’re early.” she chuckled and took the seat opposite you, “so are you. didn’t expect that from you. did something motivate you?”
“oh, don’t even. i don’t know what you’re talking about.” you scowled, scrolling on your phone to hide the blush creeping up on your face. she pushed your phone down with a grin, “we have to talk, y/n.”
“about what..?”
“your clothes. what the hell are you wearing.” your facial expressions dropped and you stared at her with a look of disapproval. “i’m not impressed. you’re not funny. it’s good to see that you fixed your hair though.” you retorted.
“you still find me pretty, don’t you?” she teased with a smile. all you could do was stare and you knew you looked stupid. you felt stupid, of course she’d use it against you. she’s hanni. “i don’t like you.”
“hmm, that’s not what you–”
“i’m going to the bathroom! be right back!” you stood up and ran to the bathroom. you stared at yourself in the mirror, embarrassed by how flushed you looked. you wanted to strangle her. she was infuriating, how you still like her will always be a mystery to you. any regular person would hate hanni’s guts, and a part of you does! but for the most part, she makes you feel warm and fuzzy inside. you hated her for that, too.
a few minutes later, you calmed yourself down and walked out to see your friends sitting there. you let out a breath of relief and ran to engulf minji in a hug. “thank you.” you whispered, confusing the girl. “um, you’re welcome?”
“oh, you’re so dramatic.” hanni sassed, “we were alone for ten minutes. it wasn’t that bad.” you watched her roll her eyes and cross her arms, sending you a glare shortly after. so much for being civil.
‘if being alone with me for ten minutes is so torturous, why does she like me?’ hanni thought bitterly. she didn’t want to admit it, but she was jealous. she’s always been jealous of minji. you were close, always showing each other affection. hanni barely remembers a time when you weren’t on top of each other. it irked her–you irked her. you initiated all of that with minji; why couldn’t you do it with her? knowing how you feel for her, she feels a sense of entitlement over you. you should be hugging her like that. she didn’t pause for a second to think about how quick of a jump it would be for the both of you, nor did she pause to think about the fact that you had no idea that she felt the same way.
you made your orders and began debriefing about anything and everything that’s happened in the past week. however, hanni was too busy staring at you to listen to the conversation, deciding to kick you under the table to earn your attention. you flinched and stared at her with confusion written on your face. “what’s that?” she mouthed, pointing at your drink.
“whipped cappuccino,” you answered, raising your eyebrows at her. “can i try?” she asked, and you nodded at her in response. she grabbed your drink and placed her lips on your straw. your eyes widened at her actions, and hanni felt accomplished with your reaction. “yum,” she responded, sliding your drink back over to you.
“what was that.” hyein said, staring at the two of you incredulously. “what the hell was that.”
“what was what?” hanni asked casually, taking a bite out of her pastry. “she poisoned you. y/n unnie poisoned you. there’s no other explanation.” you scoffed at hyein, waving her off. “please. if i wanted to poison her, i would’ve done it years ago. why would i have willingly put up with her all this time?”
“oh really? yeah, why would you willingly put up with me all this time? honestly, i wish you would’ve poisoned me so i wouldn’t have to deal with you anymore.”
“hyein, they were doing so good.” haerin muttered, throwing her head into her hands.
“you’re lucky to know me, i’m great to be around with! you didn’t mind my company at the party last week.” you retorted. “yeah, well you didn’t mind my company either.”
“why can’t you guys just be friends?” minji asked, clearly exasperated with your dynamics. “i–we are..! um.. friends..! right, hanni?”
“..just friends?” she replied.
“w-what?!”
“what.”
“huh?!”
“pause.”
“...”
“y/n and i need to talk outside!” hanni sang, grabbing your wrist and dragging you out of the café. (and ignoring your friends and their comments)
“what the hell was that?!” you shrieked, still taken aback by her question. “it–you–i like you too, idiot!” she yelled, throwing her hands up in the air. “i don’t actually mean the insults i throw at you. that’s what i was trying to tell you before minji called.” you felt your entire world stop and in the moment you felt like your head was about to explode. “why the hell didn’t you tell me after?!”
“i was scared! i didn’t know how you’d react!” she responded, equally as hysterical as you. “well, i fucking told you i liked you, of course i’d react well, you fucking moron!”
“don’t call me a moron, i’m not a moron! you’re a moron!”
“why are you yelling at me?!”
“why are you yelling at me?!” she retorted, causing you to change your demeanor. “oh, i’m sorry. i’m just freaking out. i don’t know what to do. what do we do now?” with a sigh, hanni shook her head. “i don’t know. i just feel stupid, we’ve liked each other for so long and we just.. wasted time. i wished i told you sooner.”
“me too, but there’s no better time than the present..? ..right?” you beckoned, earning a small smile from the girl in front of you. “you still want to be with me..?”
you took a step closer, “if that’s okay with you?” hanni chuckled, grabbing your hands and wrapping them around her waist. “yeah, that could be arranged.”
“and we wouldn’t try to kill each other?”
“and we would compliment each other.”
“sounds gross,” you joked, yelping shortly after. “ow!” rubbing your arm with one hand and keeping the other around her waist. “you’re lucky you’re cute.”
you giggled, poking her sides. “you like me.”
“you like me too, don’t let it get to your head.” she grumbled, pulling you closer to her. she closed her eyes as she wrapped her arms around you and placed her head on your shoulder. for so long, she’s dreamt about the warmth of your embrace and now that she was in your arms–she didn’t want to be anywhere else.
“wait, so you don’t think my outfits are bad?”
“don’t ruin the moment, you loser.”
“you owe all me 50 bucks,” dani cheered with a grin on her face, groans from the other three following suit.
im going to die now, thank u. not proofread !!!!
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3005 - Mühl
Don’t drink when you have an inexplicable yearning for your bestfriend.
Nika Muhl x Fem Reader
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You stood underneath the basket in the huskies gym. Lost in a daze as a familiar Croation girl was practicing her form. Her concentration left a mark in between her eyebrows and her lips slightly pursed. You had been thinking about how tough two had first met. Starting off as roommates who would speak maybe every other day to doing everything together. When you first started talking to Nika as a friend instead of a roomie, you had acknowledged the girls very obvious beauty. The way her eyes shined when the sun hit them, how whenever she was frustrated her accent would be more pronounced in every syllable, and how she was incredible person and an even better athlete.
Your fall for her was quick and without warning as you had begun to notice the way your body would involuntarily heat up with the smallest contact. Not to mention whenever she was just a little closer to you your heart would pick up and you could hear the blood flowing within you. Without your noticing Nika had stopped when she had realized your out of touch look.
“Hey are you okay?” Concern laced throughout her words.
“Yea sorry I zoned out.” Your response not convincing her as she started her walk towards you giving you a small smile. As she walked closer to the rim, she took out her ponytail and began to talk
“Are you sure? we can go, I was practically done anyways.”
“Sorry, I’m just not feeling a hundred percent today” Not lying but not being completely honest, the feeling of boredom from just catching Nikas rebounds was starting to get to you. You also just wanted an excuse to retreat to your dorm as it was starting to get late and you had an essay due later in the week.
“It’s okay, plus I know you have that paper due soon. Can we go out after you’re done. I kinda wanna get drunk tonight.” She smiles at you with a large grin at her last few words. Her eyes comparable to a puppies.
“I dont know Niks, I kinda just wanna stay in tonight.” Your response causing her to lock you into a tight hug, she moves you side to side as she began to yell please a million times over. Her grasp unrelenting until another girl clad in a UConn practice jersey walked over.
“Twin can you like stop making out with (yn) in the gym, thanks.” Paige spoke as she peeled Nika off of your body. Your face a slight hue of pink due to the hug and Paiges statement.
“See, look at her, poor girl.” She continues to point out the spread across your cheeks. All Paige ever did was tease you about Nika. She was a very observant girl, a skill acquired from years of basketball, so she was quick to deduce that you had a major crush on Nika. Faster than you were able to in fact.
She had offered to put in good word for you and try to “gas you up” to her. But you had declined in fear of rejection. All her past relationships were with men so why would that change now was your mindset.
“Ughh, she doesnt want to go out tonight, and I wanted her-”
“Youre going out tonight. Were actually all going out tonight. I know you have major FOMO too so boom I win.” Paige quickly cuts Nika off.
“Thats actually so unfair. What time?” You ask rolling your eyes, as you can feel a small smile move its way onto your face.
“9, Nikas driving since she offered, be at my dorm by 8:30.” Paige quickly finishes as her coach, Geno, walked into the gym area. Saying her quick goodbyes as she went to follow him.
“See this is why Paige is my twin, cause she always manages to convince you to go out with me.” Nika says smiling at you as she dragged you both out of the gym.
“Thats unfair Niks you know I cant say no to group events.”
“Well thats your fault you should already know to never say no to me.”
“How toxic of you. I dont know how I manage being roommates with such an evil girl.” You joke as she unlocks her car.
“Please, you love this evil girl. I see the way you look at me.”
You scoff at her reply, internally however, your heart racing in your chest. The last few words were dancing on the line of serious and playful banter.
A sudden laugh from her eases your heart however as you look out the window searching the tree line for seemingly nothing. Missing the look she gives you.
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“WHO WANTS SHOTS?” A drunked Paige shouts right next to your ear as she looks over your shoulder to see a good portion of her teammates. You recoil from the loud shouting, to be honest you don’t even remember arriving.
You look around the bar in search of Nika who had been missing for the better part of the meet. You remember her saying she was going to go the bathroom. In good will you started to make your way towards the bathroom hoping she wasn’t in there dying from what felt like a couple of hundred shots Paige had made the both of you down earlier.
“Yo (yn) wait” The same blonde stops you, gripping your shoulder and harshly turning you around. The alcohol seemed to make her forget her own strength as she quickly patted the area she grasped.
“Drink this, trust me.” She said as she handing you a long shot filled with a clear alcohol.
“What is it?” You pondered familiar with the looks of it, but with Paige you wouldn’t chance it knowing how much she wanted you to confront Nika about your feelings.
“Just trust me, okay? You’ll be more open with her I promise. And if it goes south, then you can take another and you wont even remember how embarrassed you are.” She answered your question with full confidence
Taking turns looking at Paige and the shot, not knowing if it was the alcohol that you had downed earlier finally kicking in or Paiges convincing smile, you had downed the shot quickly recoiling when it had burned.
“Fuck Paige, what is this?” You ask her as your face involuntarily scrunches
“Everybody’s favorite, Everclear” she laughs as she began to push you in the direction of the bathroom. When you had finally reached the door, she had pushed you in, giving you a small smile and thumbs up before locking the door from the inside and quickly retreating. From the outside Paige had found an out of service sign and promptly put it infront of the door before heading back to her teammates table, all while giggling to herself about playing cupid.
From inside the somehow empty bathroom you heard slight hiccups and a sniffle.
“Nika? Is that you?” You ask even though you knew it couldn’t be anyone else.
A few shuffles later from the other side of the large stall, the door opens and reveals a disheveled Nika, who very obviously had too much to drink.
“Take me to yours please” She stumbled out of the stall, collapsing into your arms as she put her full weight on to you. Her body was on fire, you could feel the warmth radiating from off her, it almost felt good if she wasn’t slick with sweat. Her head rested upon your shoulder as you took her back into the big stall, you walking forward as she walked backwards to which she rose her head and looked at you confused.
“I cant right now, Paige made me drink another shot and I can feel it in my legs.” You explained, you would of drove both of you home by now if you didn’t feel a fuzziness erupting from your lower half.
Nika released a big sigh before leaning herself against the wall and sliding down to sit with her head laid back against the wall and her legs fully extended.
“Sit with me” She had demanded without even looking up
“Yea no, that floors dirty.” The alcohol had you speaking without fixing your tone as you came off a little harsh.
“I don’t care I want you to sit with me.” Nika picked her head up as it was heavy to look up at you. The way the light had hit her eyes made them shine in a way that softened you. Without a fuss, you had begun to kneel down to sit next to her without even realizing. Her smile as your back rested against the wall made the grimy floor somewhat bearable.
“You make me feel so full” Nika blurbed out. Her cheeks dusted with a sheen of pink that complimented her tan.
“Mhm, remind me not to let you drink next time we go out.” You replied jokingly, if she had said that comment earlier when you were sober you might’ve exploded on the spot. Luckily the drink had calmed your demeanor and even made you a little braver.
“Actually, you know, like when im with other people. Its different. Empty, you know. Even with people im interested in, they never make me feel the way you do.” The way she stumbled over her words tugged strings in your heart.
“Who like your ex? Obviously Niks, he was kind of an ass”
She chuckles at the thought of her past lover and your obvious distaste for him. Sure he wasn’t that horrible but he only did the bare minimum. And for some reason Nika could never explain unless she was under the influence, whenever he or anybody, would fuck up her first thought was to compare them to you.
“Yea, but everything’s different when it comes to you” She said in a hushed voice, her eyes never moving off of yours. Instinct from basketball or not you relished in her undivided attention. It made you dizzy.
“In what way?” You asked, discreetly shuffling yourself a little closer to her body.
“Fuck everybody but you.” Her response made you smile. Here you were sitting with a drunken Nika who was trying so hard to explain herself to you.
“Fuck em?” You laughed out, her sudden brazen attitude towards the world surprised you. For somebody so level headed like her, she seemed like a teenager trying to find her way.
“Fuck em” She clarified while grabbing your hand. Given, she was usually touchy with you. But it felt different this time. The warmth of her hand had lit a possibility. Taking your chance, you interlocked your fingers with hers, taking your eyes off of her for a moment to fully take in the occasion. The way her hands were mostly soft except for some calluses entranced you. You used your other hand to trace her own. Slowly you felt her slump her head on to your shoulder. Her scent was overwhelming, invading your brain until all you could think of was her and nothing else. Nika was all that mattered.
She looked at you through her eyelashes prompting you to move your head ever so slightly to lock eyes with her.
Maybe it was the alcohol or the way you could smell her perfume but the way she was looking at you in this moment was unmistakable. It was the same look Paige would use to describe you looking at her. But she had slowly sat up, she was close enough that you could feel every little exhale against your face. It was a strange feeling, it felt so weird yet so right. Maybe it was the fear of your friendship breaking that made you turn to look straight ahead. But that feeling was quickly shut down when Nika had softly grabbed the side of your face, with her non dominant hand, making you look at her. Her touch felt like fire against your skin.
“Youre so pretty” Her sudden compliment made you feel even warmer. All her actions made you float. Youre head felt dizzy as you involuntarily looked at her soft plump lips as she spoke once again. Youre throat was dry, opening your mouth to try and talk but she quickly covered your mouth before you could speak.
“I wanna be by your side, but only of you’ll have me” Her confession makes you freeze in your spot, making you quickly sober up. You had started to smell the lingering alcohol that tinged her breath. As much as you would like to accept her confession, she was drunk. You doubted she would remember what she said in the heat of the moment. As your stuck in your thoughts, you feel your head moving down and see her features getting closer.
You stick your hand in between the two of you. Making Nika place her lips against the inside of your hand.
“Youre drunk Niks, let’s talk about this in the morning.” You managed to speak, regretting your actions however as Nika quickly stood up and with glossy eyes she managed to say in a broken voice
“This is so embarrassing, can we just forget I said anything. I don’t wanna lose you as a friend” She looked at you as you followed her up, you grabbed her hands, gently rubbing her knuckles as you assured her
“No, Nika I promise you I want you too. I just cant while you’re drunk. Youre so beautiful and amazing, trust me I want to kiss you so bad, I just cant while you’re drunk. Pretty bad huh, I got an amazing woman trying to kiss me and I refuse” You quickly joke hoping to put her at ease.
She stood there for a second before a small smile appeared with an even smaller tear cascading down her round flushed cheeks.
“Super bad” She replied as she put her arms against your shoulders, leaning her forehead against yours. Swiftly, you pressed a chaste kiss against her cheek before pulling her impossibly closer and hiding your face in her brown hair.
She laughed at your child like behavior but she couldn’t complain since she had longed for a tight hug filled with compassion from you. She didn’t even know she needed it until now. She felt a wave of tiredness wash over her as she whispered in your ear.
“Take me home please. Stay with me tonight”
“Of course”
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You had blinked and suddenly had woken up with a familiar weight on top of you. Nika was acting like koala on your side as one of her legs lay across your belly and her arm across your front assuring her grip on you. Guessing from the fact that you both laid on the still made bed, you had both crashed as soon as you made it to Nika’s dorm.
With careful wiggling, you had managed to shimmy Nikas arm off of you as you decided to get up and try to surprise her with a good start to her day, a full breakfast. When you tried to lift her leg off of your stomach, she quickly parried by instead straddling you giving you a quick drowsy smile before leaning down to hide her face in the crook of your neck.
“Goodmorning” Her muffled voice vibrated against the skin of your neck, inadvertently making you smile.
“Goodmorning” You said while you wrapped your arms around her back, gently tracing shapes along it.
“So?” She asked
“So what”
“So wheres my kiss” She said trying to be brave but failing as you could feel her lips dance their way up your nape and to your jaw. Not even kissing, just grazing, which somehow made it feel even better.
She stopped right before she touched the corner of your lips to give a loving yet cautious look to ask for permission.
“I didn’t even get a chance to brush my teeth and you wanna kiss me. Just tell me how bad you want me Niks”
A soft giggle erupted from her as she smiled widely and slid off of your body and off of the bed. Her warmth quickly leaving you wanting for more.
“Youre right, I’ll show you after you’re done.” She said as she walked away, her body language very obviously taunting you as she left you in the empty bed.
Sitting up, you chased after her to find her with a toothbrush in her mouth and waving a new toothbrush package in the air before throwing it at you.
“Eager are we?” You tease her, she rolls her eyes at your comment before rinsing out her mouth and standing behind you as you applied toothpaste to your own toothbrush.
“Im gonna make coffee. I wanna talk more about last night” She told you before kissing your cheek and walking off.
You watched her leave in the mirror, admiring her back profile before finishing up your small task. As you walked into the open kitchen the smell of coffee beans hit your nose and one hell of a view hit your eyes. Nika was pouring 2 cups of coffee, one for you and one for her. It was something that you had seen before as you and the Croatian have had countless sleepovers but never in this context. It was something that you could definitely get use to seeing more often.
Walking up to the counter, you grabbed both mugs before heading into the living area and setting them on the coffee table in front of her couch. You turned on the TV and put on the news to a lowered volume setting for some background noise. For some odd reason you were nervous. Your heart was beating a little faster than usual. Even though you already knew what she was gonna say, she liked you. Right?
“Listen about last night.” Nika had started off as she walked around the small table to sit adjacent to you. Your legs touching as she slid closer.
“I like you, like really like you.” Her pronounced really made her accent come out stronger than usual. Her face was serious and her hands were clasped as she looked down at her mug filled with a light brown coffee. She was just as nervous as you were which put you at ease.
“I really like you too Niks. I wanna be with you too. Can I ask you something?” Her demeanor was more relaxed now as you were completely honest with her. A smile plastered across her face at the reciprocated feelings.
“Anything” She had answered
“When did you start liking me?” You had wanted to know since last night. The question was tugging at you. You had wanted to know how much time you had wasted being friends when you could have been in each others arms.
“I dont know the exact time I really realized. But I knew when I just couldnt stop thinking of you, day or night. Even in my dreams you would be there. I would compare everybody to you. You were my standard. Eventually I just realized I wanted to be with you.” She says before taking a sip of her hot drink. Her earnest tone made you go crazy. She was confessing her love for you, it wasn’t a dream, it wasn’t a delusion, it was real life and it felt so good.
“Mhm” was all you could reply with. You were afraid that if you did speak an actual word you would end up being too loud out of pure happiness.
“What about you when did you start liking me.” She had asked back. You looked down at the table for your own cup, grabbing it and watching the way the liquid would sway with every little movement.
“One day, a while back near the start of spring, I forget what I was doing but I felt sad. I felt like it should have been the two of us there. I forgot whatever I was doing, but I never forgot the feeling of missing you. I didn’t expect it to hurt so much. Then when I got back to my dorm, you were there waiting for me, already watching a movie and finishing off the last of my snacks. If it were anybody else I probably would of gotten mad, but then you got up and ran to hug me and asked where I had been and at that moment I felt a warmth. Like the kind that you get when you hug somebody you care for but it was multiplied by 100” You hadnt looked at her your entire speech. You set back down the coffee without even taking a sip. You just needed the focus on something else so you could speak your mind freely. Putting your attention back on Nika you noticed a look you had seen before. The same level of concentration she had while on the court except instead of a fierceness it held a soft look. As if she was taking in every feature across your face and engraving it into her soul.
“Can I kiss you?” She had asked, you smiled at her politeness, before nodding. Without a second between she had quickly leaned forward to press her lips against yours. Slowly, you moved your lips against hers. Taking in the softness of her lips and how she tasted like coffee. Not breaking the kiss, she had sat herself onto your lap as her arms wrapped around your neck ensuring you wouldn’t be able to back out this time. Not that you would.
Your hands found her waist. Firm from constant practice and conditioning, you started to grip her sides with your hands while also pulling her forward making sure your chests were flush against each other. Nika let out a soft groan as she opened her mouth, her nose brushing against your cheek as she went to hide her face in your nape, prompting you to kiss against hers. You kissed up and down her neck, her breath had fastened and she started to get louder in your ear. Her sounds made you grip her even harder as you opened your mouth slightly, you started nipping her. Making sure to leave faint purple and red marks across it. Nika had started to slightly grind on your body, erupting a feeling deep within your stomach before a sudden alarm went off on her phone making her quickly turn around to check it.
“Fuck!” She had yelled, extremely frustrated as she had hopped off your lap.
Stunned for a moment at the fact that your guys session had comed to an abrupt end. You stood up asking her what was wrong. Following her into her room as she threw some items from the drawers into her bag.
“I forgot today was Tuesday, im so so so sorry, I have practice today. Geno will kill me if I dont show up on time” She said quickly before heading back out of the room and grabbing her keys off of the kitchen counter.
“Please please please, be here when I get back.”
“So we can..?” You asked, you wanted to joke with her so she could see the irony in the situation, that and the fact she seemed incredibly stressed out over her coach and being late to practice.
“So we can pick up where we left off obviously. You have a weird thing for getting me to say that I want you.” She laughed as she stood in the door way.
“I just love hearing you say it. Sounds good” You smiled at her, admiring the way her hair was slightly frizzy and how pretty she was even with a bare face. If she wasn’t a basketball star she could have easily been a model.
“Okay, ill make sure to tell you just how much I want you when I get back, but you gotta be here babe” She had begun to tease you back, after giving a chuckle at her remark, she stole a quick kiss from you before walking down the dorm buildings hallway.
“I’ll be here, don’t take too long Mühl” You had said down the hallway. She turned around, and suddenly started bolting down the hallway. You didn’t even have a second to react before she kissed you in front of her dorm.
“I don’t know I suddenly feel kinda sick. Im going to text Geno that im going to get the doctor to treat me. Go to the bed. Ill be there in a second.”
Without saying a word, you swiftly turned around and made your way down the dorm and turned into Nikas large room. Sitting on her bed before hearing the door close.
“Yea, im going to see a doctor sorry Coach, yea her name is Dr. (yln). I will, thanks bye.”
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Okay W ending once again. Going to write the 2nd part to this later. Maybe post it in 2-3 days. This was my longest post yet brudda.
Send in some requests pretty please. Im out of ideas and had writers block before pushing this baby out at like 1 AM 🙏.
Also W you if you got the multiple references in this fic.
#nika muhl x reader#nika muhl fanfic#nika mühl#uconn wbb#uconn huskies#uconn lives#Spotify#nika muhl smut
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RG tells Matty to go and deal with Stevie because she gets suspended and he’s being stern but she breaks down and confides in him?
the school calls. you know as soon as the teacher introduces himself, which child he is calling about. you're at the bookstore, and can't get out until closing, so you call matty.
"school called," you say to him when he picks up.
"stevie matilda?"
"stevie matilda. can you go get her? i can't leave work."
so he does. he shuts down the music he was working on and gets in the car, flipping his keys over and over in his hands. at front desk he doesn't need to introduce himself.
"ah, mr healy," the receptionist says.
"how are you, gwen?"
"oh you know, same old, different day."
matty nods in agreement, "well i'm here again, so you're not the only one. where is my delight?"
"stevie is ready for you," she says, and points to the little waiting room to the side. he looks through the glass and sees her, twiddling her hair, looking in her lap. his heart twinges. his sweet little baby. it doesnt feel like the same girl who couldve called her teacher a cunt. which he secretly finds fucking hilarious. but he rearranges his face. you've told him to be more stern. he barges into the waiting room. its an act. it's all an act.
"get up." he says, "let's go."
"dad i..."
"let's go," he says, cutting her off. she slopes off the chair, grabbing her bag and going past him and out the door.
"what you playing at stevie?" matty says when they're in the car.
she turns around a grins at him. she thinks she can break him. she's done it so many times. he doesnt budge.
"well?" he says. her face falls. she turns to look out the window.
"nothing."
"we aint going for ice cream this time pal. it's getting too much. i cant keep coming out here and getting you from school. you really need to get your fucking act together."
"who are you?" stevie says, pulling a face at him.
"don't. i can't keep bailing you out of things. i dont get it. well i do. i know it's fucking shit to have to do things you dont wanna do. but you can't keep doing this. you're gonna fuck up your life."
stevie mumbles something. matty doesnt hear.
"what?"
"i said, maybe i want to!" stevie snaps. he can hear the pain in her voice as it catches in her throat. he looks over at her. she's hiding her face. is she crying. is his tough little girl crying.
"stevie?" he says, his voice softening. her shoulders shake, "oh baby girl."
he's cracked and he knows it but he doesnt care. this is different. this feels different. he knows her. he knows her. she is part of him. so like him. his melancholy shadow. his midnight nightmare buddy. both of them often up in the early hours of the morning, unable to sleep. he thinks about all those years. the thinking. the overthinking. the shakes. the panic attacks. the overcast feeling. she is so much like him. he pulls over the car.
"my love," he says, "are you okay?"
his own voices cracks, he's crying too now.
"i'm so bored," she says, "i'm so bored."
"does everything feel, like, grey?"
she nods. she starts sobbing.
"i was trying to concentrate in french," she gushes out, "i was. but my mind kept drifting and i was looking at my book and i was just doodling to try and get my hands to do something so my mind could listen but the teacher yelled at me and it was so unfair and i know i shouldnt have yelled and i know i shouldnt have said that word but... i just. i just did."
"oh love," he says. he holds out his arms to her. she clambers into them, as if she is still a small child. "its okay," he says rubbing her back. "it was the wrong thing to do. okay but sometimes, if our minds aren't feeling well, we do the wrong things. i do them all the time."
"i know," stevie says, through tears. matty chuckles.
"alright!" he says. he wipes her eyes. "we're gonna help you. okay? this feeling bored? the grey? we're gonna talk to someone about it. and we need to start trying to get more sleep. both of us. okay?"
she looks up at him and nods.
"deal?"
"deal," she says.
"now, let's go get some ice cream."
#ruins#ruins behind the scenes#matty healy x reader#matty healy x you#matty healy#matty healy x y/n#the 1975 fanfic#matty healy fanfiction#dad!matty
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sandcastles
summary: for their first date, grayson takes paloma to the beach to recreate the first time they met.
pairing: grayson x paloma (f!oc)
word count: 970
as one of the winners of my valentines giveaway, this drabble is for @frutillia! the artwork was done by @softfairies, who is very cool and also proofread this for me so yk,,, go support her :)
paloma sits restlessly in the passenger seat, glancing between the road ahead and grayson next to her, his fingers drumming against the steering wheel along to the beat of the music playing in the background. she doesn't recognise the artist, but her best friend seems to be a fan of the acoustic melody and raspy vocals. she still can't quite wrap her head around it; she used to know everything there was to know about the man and now she finds herself getting to know him all over again. so much has changed and yet not enough, especially not the butterflies in her stomach anytime they're together. but then again, it's finally their first date; she's allowed to have butterflies.
she clears her throat, shifting in the seat to turn her body towards him and he tilts his head towards her to show he's listening. "so, um... you haven't told me where we're going."
keeping her eyes on his face, she watches as his cheeks begin to turn red.
"it's a surprise," he says softly, almost as if embarrassed by his idea and before she can come up with a reply, he reaches over the center console to take her hand in his.
"okay," she agrees, her own face getting warm and she gives his hand a gentle squeeze. the drive continues in comfortable silence and its not long before grayson pulls the car to a stop in an empty parking lot, the beach front sprawling out in front of them.
she glances at him curiously but he only smiles back. climbing out, he rounds the front of the car to open her door for her, refusing to listen when she insists she can do so herself, and he makes sure to grab a backpack from the backseat before taking her hand once more. she follows along as he leads her down the sand, the waves lapping softly at their feet.
"if i had known we were coming to the beach, i wouldn't have worn jeans," she jokes and he glances down, sheepish.
"sorry," he says before looking at her again, a smile curling on his lips. "but i'm hoping it's worth it."
"what is?"
squeezing her hand, he slides the backpack off his shoulder. "since it's our first date," he says as he begins to pull open the zipper, "i thought we could maybe build a sandcastle."
he pulls out two plastic buckets and spades, and she feels as if her heart swells in her chest. judging from the size and bright colours, it's obvious that they're cheap children's toys but it doesn't really matter. not when it's with grayson.
she smiles back at him, overwhelmed by the amount of love she feels for him in that moment, and she reaches for a spade. "just like when we met," she says softly, running her thumb over the groves in the handle. when she glances up at him, she finds him watching her with a hopeful look on his face. "i think it's perfect."
his shoulders sag with relief and he pulls her into his side, pressing his lips to the crown of her head as if its the most natural thing in the world. she sinks into him, breathing him in and longing for more, but he lets her go all too soon.
"so, paloma," he states. "tu veux construire un château de sable avec moi?"
she laughs. "of course."
grinning, he sinks to his knees on the sand and she follows suit. together, they build in silence, though as the castle grows, she notices him paying more attention to her than the task at hand.
"you know, it doesn't count if i do all the work," she chuckles and he shakes his head as if to shake himself from his staring only for his eyes to lock back onto her face almost immediately.
"sorry," he says but she can tell he doesnt quite mean it. "i'm just not fully convinced this is actually happening."
she can't help but frown. "what do you mean?"
"that you're here, real and in front of me, for starters," he replies and her stomach twists at the thought of their time apart. "and that you agreed to go out with me. i never thought you would."
"i never thought you would," she says. "i've had a crush on you forever."
a bright smile unfolds on his face that she finds contagious. "who knew we were such idiots?"
"i think everyone but us," she quips and when he laughs, she realises just how much she wants to make him laugh for the rest of time. and without really thinking, she says the words she been wanting to say for lifetime. "i love you so much, gray."
as if a switch has been flipped, he launches himself at her and her squeal of surprise is effectively cut off when he kisses her. full of passion and years of pent up longing, it only takes them a few seconds to get lost within each other. it feels like an eternity when they pull away and simultaneously not long enough. he presses his forehead against hers; his hands gently cupping her face, thumbs brushing over her cheekbones. she thinks she could lose herself in the warmth of his gaze until he speaks. "i love you too, paloma. forever and always."
feeling suddenly shy, she glances away, turning her head to the side and catching sight of the heap of sand that used to be their castle. "looks like we'll have to start again," she pouts and he glances briefly at the castle ruins before kissing her cheek.
"i'll do anything you want me to," he states. "especially if it means i get to kiss you again."
"grayson?"
"yeah?"
"kiss me again."
he's all too happy to oblige.
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https://www.tumblr.com/hockybish/743160802329116672/nico-goes-straight-to-him-doesnt-wait
ANGST
As I finished this I realize it feels a bit Home Alone ish. And rereading it it's more drama vs angst. But I like the it. 😅
“Okay okay. Calm down miss. Let’s see here, we have a couple of flights …” she started to drone on, her fingernails clicking away on the keyboard. "Alrighty the soonest nonstop is at five."
"Five? As in pm? Three hours from now?" Nico's eyes bugged out. That was too long of a wait. She couldn't wait that long. Matthew was probably already on his way in the sky and he was probably thinking she was going to be breaking up with him over what a misunderstanding?
No. She couldn't wait those three hours. There has to be a sooner flight. "Is there anything else? I'm begging. I don't have any luggage or carry ons. I made a mistake with my boyfriend and I. Please."
"There's a flight that leave in 30 minutes there's a slight layover in Washington and it's on to Phoenix. It would get you there a bit faster than waiting for the later flight. Does that work?"
That was perfect. It kind of hit her then that she really didn't have anything on her and she was still in her short golf skirt and halter top and her wallet wasn't in her pocket.
Nonetheless she shoved her hand in the sewn in pouch. She found her license and her older brother's card, he must have slipped them in there while she was getting out of the car. Nico couldn't have been more thankful.
Settling down in the her seat, Nico started thinking about how she would apologize to her beau. Maybe she should pick up a bouquet of flowers like men do when they need to apologize for doing something wrong. Matthew would think it's funny and jokingly make a quip about how she can't buy his forgiveness with a kiss and pretty flowers.
Nico had solidified her plan by end of the short flight.
She checked her phone got off the plane, she didn't have as much time as she thought. She turned her skipping into a full on run to the gate on the opposite side of the airport, praying she would get there before-
"I'm sorry miss, you just missed the plane." The man point to the large window. Sure enough the large plane was being taxied to the right runway. Dejected, Nico turned around to start over on finding a way to Matthew.
Nico started crying as she called Trevor and explained to about the new mishap. She should have just waited for the later nonstop flight and this wouldn't have happened and she would feel stupid right now.
"Nic, remember Chili's checklist from Bluey?"
"You watch Bluey?"
"I've seen somethings on TikTok. Shut it" Of course he'd seen an episode or two or maybe the whole series, he had a lot of time on his hands, sue him. But he didn't want to expose himself completely. So he lied a little. "Checklist?"
"I have a little cry." Nico wiped her tears one final time.
"Check!
"I pick myself up." She took a deep breathe and stood a little taller.
"Check!"
"Dust myself off" She then swiped at the little bit of dirt that was on the pleat of her skirt.
"Check!" Trevor elongated the e in check.
"And keep going"
"The show must go on!" The siblings chanted to together. Nico couldn't thank Trevor enough for helping her calm and reassuring her that she would get there and everything would be okay.
Nico made her way once again to the ticket counter. She had a bit more pep in her step. Nothing was going to get in her way.
And when the man said there was nothing nonstop, but that they could only get her a flight to Vegas and she would have to hop on a flight from a different company. She didn't panic.
She remembered the checklist, going over it, hearing Trevor's voice as she checked everything off again. She would make it.
When she finally got to Phil was there waiting for her to take her to his little brother. He didn't like how moppy Matthew seemed and wanted to help anyway her could.
"The show must go on" She smiled to herself, letting herself out of Phil's car when they pulled up to their destination. Phil gave her a weird look and she promised to explain it later to the Slovak.
"Hi Matthew" She played with the new pendant hanging around her neck, the feeling of the engraved initials on the back kept her nerves at bay as she held out the bouquet of mixed flowers for the man she loved so much.
#zegras!sister au#nicolette.grace#au thoughts#this took longer than I thought#I had to do a little research on flights and such#I don't like being wrong about things
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hell yeah baby backstory time
it is time for the boston tea party caper!!
notes under the cut assss always
this episode is a bit of a mix-up for me. i like it but not my favorite all things considered. i'm still excited though- some of the moments in this episode are GOLD
HQ!!!
JHSGHSD "hey red hows san diego" "not great" "im not talking about you girl"
"i thought he lived in the cloud"
player looks so unamused pls
PLEASE "though i am hearing voices again" HOW WAS THAT RELEVANT. WERE U HEARING VOICES BEFORE
shadowsan is the best character here he's so funny
THE "THAT IS NOT WHAT I MEANT"
if they vowed to use their "superpowers" for good and ivy hotwired that car later on i guess maybe they used to steal cars and then decided to go straight maybe
ivy is so cool
OH hey also by the way their younger designs. SO GOOD carmen should have gotten a dorky in between phase we were robbbbed
small
not trey and his butt chin
i like how the screen glitches when its paused on trey. new headcanon this is a powerpoint presentation they threw together right then and there
you dare knock LYDIA
"i got this" zack says with the confidence of a man who just ate taco bell learning they won't see another restroom for eight more hours on the road trip
the talking through the race kills me every time 😭you can't hear each other
man this racetrack has an overhead drone keeping exact pace with the leading car
zack had a chase devineaux phase too once
carmen sandiego: oh no no we're rated for seven year olds!! the boston tea party caper: the mafia boss who lent us money threatened to put a hit out on us if we didn't commit a robbery for him on a suspicious front for a money laundering operation for the mob
the main reason i dislike this episode and need for speed is because zack doesnt ever get to learn. he was impulsive and it was bad in duke of vermeer, he was impulsive and it was bad in boston tea (okay fine, it shows us his younger self! fine with that) BUT THEN HE IS IMPULSIVE AND ITS BAD AGAIN NEXT TIME. FOR THE SAME REASONS whyyy wouldn't they take duke of vermeer as an opportunity to show his growth instead of making him out to be some angry no control childish idiot who sacrifices untold amounts for a little payback. and drags ivy down with him EVERY TIME
there's something so cool and sinister about ivy smiling, reassuring him, and then slowly pulling down the ski mask to hide any emotion. ivy and zack seem like they could have been prime targets for VILE recruitment- they could have gone down a much darker path
shadowsan was so invested
carmen's puberty crammed in those few months between the boat and the boston holy shit
player accidently saved zack and ivy's asses by turning off those cameras jgjsgkd
the second perspective of zack crashing into the wall kills me every time pls
here goes carmen with "its for your own safety" who taught her that phrase
i love how z and i immediately think that this person couldnt possibly be...i dont know. an employee or a manager or someone who works at the donut place. she's gotta be another thief. i mean they are right but like why
the giant ass green vault behind the fridge door 😭
WE'RE FOLLOWIN THAT LADY FOLLOWIN THOSE BREADCRUMBS TO THE DOUGH
wait didn't they arrive in a truck parked on the other side of the building
carmen ALSO had a chase devineaux phase
???? isnt that truck she just stole the one they got there in???
i mean carmen. girl. you kicked them out of their own robbery and then stole their car did you expect them not to follow you
carmen's devineaux side coming out <3 also completely shameless carmen cant drive comic plug
there are so many car accidents literally everyone could have died in for these two (this and need for speed) episodes. credits roll as the paramedics show up to carmen who just CRASHED HER CAR INTO A FUCKING HOLE HEAD FIRST
they had to make sure to show us that carmen was literally the worst driver possible to justify zack being there
i love zack immediately getting super friendly with the random woman who just stole their car, crashed it, and then stole it again with them inside
carmen: haha suave quip zack and ivy, the two most neurodivergent bitches on the planet: IN THE REVOLUTIONARY WAR
also carmen looks hilariously uncomfortable wedged behind this shipping crate. she's experiencing her first infodump
the loaning money joke is actually very funny
i kind of like how awkward carmen still is in some areas. she still talks like a VILE operative- she reports her every move to player, she simply responds with "understood." because thats the only way she knows how to relate
ANGY
ivy: oh no camera: zooms out to show the most outraged face the animators could draw
screenshots of all time
can you imagine your weirdgirl little 16 year old classmate dips and you see her a few months later and she's turned into this trenchcoat wearing 5'7" long haired adult woman whose only goal is to make your life a thousand times harder
not quite sure how this episode said "oh yeah. her classmates who knew her as a kid constantly call her by the wrong name and disrespect her despite constant corrections. and also her mother figure, seeing the new her, disowns her with the proclamation that this new person killed her child when she took this new name and betrayed her" and made it not transgender
le chevre was so cool about everything for like three minutes
HEY okay my favorite detail of the show is that when carmen runs in this episode she gets way out of breath because she isn't in shape yet i LOVE that detail
i have never heard more emotion from gina than when she went "YOU GOTTA BE KIDDING ME"
THROW HER OVERBOARD
el topo is also cool about things for like three minutes
zack and ivy bounce constantly between dumb orange cat energy and golden retriever who would jump into the ocean for a guy who petted them once energy
legend has it carmen still manages to throw el topo and le chevre in the water every time they are within a mile of it
i love le chevre backing up and running away from her because he's like oh shit. wasn't she like the best in our class?? is she going to kill me or something?? why did she leave VILE what the fuck im booking it nah
YEAH I NEED THE ROPE CARMEN IS SO MEAN IN THIS EPISODE ITS SO FUCKING FUNNY
IVY RESPONDING TO THE ASK FOR "MUSCLES" WAS A UNIVERSAL LESBIAN WIN FOR EVERY SINGLE PERSON ON THE PLANET GOD WHAT AN ICONIC SCENE. MILADY. ALL SHE HAD TO DO WAS KISS HER HAND GOD
its never brought up ever again that ivy's "shirt" is actually a blue undershirt and a black vest and that is criminal we needed a gay vest. something
the slomo kick is so hot
LE CHEVRE STEPPING ON HER HEAD
those plates must have hurt so fucking bad
okay well. you DO commit crimes
"the police have no idea they exist" okay. TELL THEM
SEE? VEST.
"got any room for us on your next job?" "you know what? sure! come along and help me take down this global criminal organization. uhhh what are your names again btw?"
yall i dont think eddie is going to want to see you for the money
A FLYING CAR he said yeah zack that was smart
i love how offended by literally everything the bostonians do shadowsan is
THEY MADE SHADOWSAN GET IN THE BACK BEHIND THE SEAT HAHAHAHHJHD
that hq wont be so wasted when you die of hypothermia! good luck carmen
alrighty, thats the beantown caper all done! only two more to catch up on before I'm on time again for my favorite episode this saturday >:)
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NUISANCE | 005. this odd feeling in my chest
[WC] . 960 prev ! mlist ! next
as if in a blink of an eye, the bus ride was over and eunbi and jake were shaking jungwon and soyeon awake.
“wake up sleepy heads,” eunbi raised an eyebrow.
soyeon groaned before realizing she was holding onto jungwons arm. she immediately let go, picking up her backpack and excused herself past jungwon, grabbing eunbi in the process.
“we’ll see you guys tomorrow,” soyeon waved, not looking back while dragging eunbi with her. she paused before walking off the bus, smelling the scent of wet rain although it had stopped raining by now.
˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
“okay wait..” eunbi started to laugh as they left the campus, “can we talk about what just happened? you were literally hugging jungwon.”
“i don’t want to talk about it,” soyeon sighed, pulling her sleeves over her hands.
“didn’t you hate him?”
“well we made up, okay?” she told her best friend.
eunbi scoffed, “clearly, something has to be going on.”
“nothings going on, we’re just friends,” soyeon stated as casual as she could even though she was still freaking out about how close they were just a minute ago.
eunbi was absolutely right though. not even a week ago had she been teasing back and forth with him in her living room.
“just because you guys are friends doesnt mean neither of you have feelings for each other,” eunbi pointed out.
“yeah like you and jake,” soyeon scoffed, arms crossing over her chest due to the cold.
eunbi gasped turning to her best friend, “what are you trying to say?”
“I don’t know maybe that you guys are clearly into each other. as if you and jake weren’t all lovey dovey in the bus too!”
“oh please, jake and i? lovey dovey? as if. we’re just friends,” she emphasized.
soyeon hums unconvinced, “that sounds oddly familiar.”
eunbi stayed quiet before stopping in her tracks, soyeon pausing after her.
“sunoo!” eunbi panicked.
“oh my god, my brother!”
the two sprinted back to campus not realizing how far they had walked already. soyeon slowed down as she saw six people walk off campus together- one of them being sunoo.
“he’s right there,” soyeon reached for eunbi’s arm to slow her down before pointing to the figures ahead of them.
they slowly approached them.
“guess who forgot me?” sunoo rolled his eyes playfully.
“i didn’t mean to, i mean it’s really cold and i’m tired,” soyeon attempted to reason.
“okay okay,” he brushed it off, “eunbi are you walking home with us?”
“yeah, we planned that since my house is too far that i could just stay at your house and borrow soyeons clothes.”
“oh okay,” sunoo nodded.
she searched for jungwon, he was not with the group.
“hey sunoo, where’s jungwon?”
“oh hana had her car at the parking lot so they drove home,” sunoo informed me, i nodded.
soyeon lined up beside eunbi as we all moved as a group. we were with jake, sunoo, heeseung, and behind us were familiar faces, it was hyunjin, jeongin, and seungmin.
“oh hey hyunjin,” she waved, slowing down to walk beside him.
“oh hey,” he smiled widely, “you remember jeongin and seungmin, right?”
“yeah,” she nodded, “jeongin you’re on the soccer team, right?”
“yup, but i don’t know i might quit and do photography.”
soyeon nodded understandably, “seungmin, you’re an art major too, no?”
“yeah, we worked together for the fruit project,” he laughed at the memory.
“oh yeah!” she laughed along.
jeongin and seungmin had eventually started a conversation together leaving hyunjin and i to talk to one another.
“you guys heading to the bus stop?” she asked.
“yeah,” he nodded, “are you guys?”
“no, our house isn’t a far walk. or well it’s far, but it’s really nothing.”
hyunjin nodded, looking at her as she spoke.
“i’m still surprised you said yes to going to the homecoming with me,” he whispered with a small relieved smile.
“you don’t need to whisper it,” she laughed, “but.. i don’t know, i ought to try it someday so..”
“you’re right, you’re right.”
it wasn’t long before they’d reached the bus stop, she waited a little back to greet them bye on the bus. as it drove away, she could see the group way ahead of her and she immediately caught up.
once she got home, she gave eunbi a sleepwear outfit. soyeon showered first and as eunbi finished up her shower, soyeon had been laying flatly on her bed with a lot on her mind.
she just couldn’t believe herself. if she thought about it, it had to be true. she lifted herself to sit up, facing her desk. she could see the dark blue sweater hung on her chair before looking at her clothing rack to see jungwons jacket being hung.
she couldn’t have. she couldn’t believe anything. it was as if she wasn’t herself. no matter how many times she tried to deny it, she knew it was true. she liked jungwon.
if she deeply thought about it, she realized that when jungwon had teased her these years she was always fed up but in a way it made her feel noticed. weird, right?
there was no possible way he could’ve liked her back. of course she wasn’t going to confess, she would never. no matter how confident she was, never in a billion years would she see herself confessing her love.
but in another universe had she wished everything had been different. that he hadn’t been stubborn this whole time, if he wasn’t then they’d probably be best friends like how he is with sunoo, but they arent. they arent best friends.
soyeon shrugged it off before crawling into bed, eunbi soon entering the room, turning off the lights and laying beside her.
note: wah we're almost done D:
© wonopia 2024
open TAGLIST: @seunghancore
#✧.* — koi's work#nuisance ff#yang jungwon#en-web#enhypen network#enhypen#kpop#kpop smau#smau#smau ff#yang jungwon ff#jungwon ff#kpop ff#ff#enemies to lovers#enemies to friends to lovers#brothers best friend#kim sunoo#jake sim#sim jaeyun#sim jake#jungwon enhypen#kpop fanfic#jake enhypen#fluff#love story#soccer x soccer#falling in love#first love#teenage love
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star trek picard episodes 1-3 thots
THE THOTS ARE BACK
So this post directly follows on from the angry freakout I had earlier this week where I live incepted myself into watching picard season 3 ride or die, because sometimes you've just got to go down to the highway and watch the car crash in person.
also, I reminded myself that I dont care about other people's star trek opinions, only my own. therefore, I needed to have star trek opinions.
here are my thots, here be spoilers
first off: gates mcfadden's face lift is fucking spectacular, the woman looks amazing. Her eye sockets are so sculpted, her cheeks are so taut, her jawline is so sharp, and yet she still looks her age. this is what growing old in the socialist utopia promises: you too can look like a woman who has not actually had to work since the early 90s. also credit to everyone looking great in their 60s, 70s and 80s.
second: jack crusher (the second??!?! how does that work anyway), is so fucking hot.
third: I went into this knowing broadly what happened in episode 1 and 2, and that episode 3 the twist is changelings, because I saw a spoiler yesterday on una mccormack's tumblr. changelings is interesting, because to do a ds9 plot in tng is bold, especially when you can't bring odo back since ya man rene audeboujournois died a few years ago. worf doesnt even mention him by name: ffs worf raffi was alive during the dominion war, she'll know who fucking odo is. he's odo.
fourth: the moment I was like, I am here for the long run was Worf's whole introduction and his everything. I think its always hard to give credit to michael dorn for being so great because he has to act stoic through SO much makeup and he just is worf, but honestly, it felt like if they'd just put the black hair on him he would have looked exactly the same as he did thirty years ago. Like they had to make his hair white just to make time have passed. The man is so well preserved, maybe he also has a very good surgeon, but I am down to believe that he just Is Like That. Damn.
five: worf is the best thing that happened to raffi, I love them together, they are the best team.
six: all of this is going to fall apart when brent spiner comes to Lore it all up, as that is obviously what was stolen from the daystrom institute alongside the portal gun.
seven: so episode 3 won me over because I had kind of forgotten how good an actor patstew is when he really gives it?? because fuck me the scene between beverly and picard where they talk about how the whole baby thing happened was so good, so subtle, so emotive. It also crucially made sense: they had tried to be together. they had failed to be together. crusher was tired of his shit, he's always been a terrible partner and it just didn't work, but then she was pregnant and ready to leave anyway, ready to move on, so just went, fine, breakup over, beverly out. Also, reminded picard that the universe keeps trying to kill him, that he'd basically killed her husband and her son, and she had no other family....thanks for the sperm donation, I'm gonna go retire and have a redo. I was already 100% team bev but now I am 200% team bev, also fuck off picard with your 'oh yeah actually I wouldn't have been my horrible abusive father fuck you for taking me at my word, my whole /r/childfree carefree bachelor attitude, how could I have known anything about myself in my early 60s, I was but a boy, we could have had it all, rolling in the deep' etc. Father and husband fuck the fuck off you traditionalist old bastard you just told us you had broken up for the FIFTH TIME.
eight: should have reserved point seven for seven herself but: SEVEN!!!! I am fucking going to do it, I'm going to write the seven of nineifesto. She is so fucking deep waters, shes been so betrayed by authority figures none of who actually give a shit about whats best for her, just for what is best for the story, she is not meant to be in starfleet ffs, she got the worst possibly mentors in janeway and picard. also seven and raffi just need to hang out with worf and tell the rest of them to fuck off.
nine: captain shaw was right and he should say it. He was having a nice time, just running his ship, doing his duty, when he gets fucking hijacked by two guys who literally are mavericks and crash ships all the time, who are manipulating seven, who MUTINIES, and they literally destroy his ship and ruin his life in the space of about 12 hours and he saw through their bullshit within 30 seconds of the 'surprise inspection' gig. justice for captain liam shaw, only sane man on the titan.
ten: look, the show is never going to stick the landing, but like all star trek, it is a journey. there are changelings, there is worf, there is raffi, there is my forthcoming 200k seven of nine fix it fic, there is so much to enjoy, and also there was the absolutely awful deaging makeup, please stop doing it, it made me feel seasick.
anyway these are my thots on yaoi kthxbye
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Heres my thoughts right now.
Today you will not carry negetivity or anger. Believing in hashem means you know that everyone gets what is coming to them and everything is going according to the plan. You dont need to understand the plan or agree with humans. Everything that needs to happen will happen. I will breathe through today.
I want a year of knowing someone before marrying him. Like the whole process to take a year. I want us to see eachother when we're sick or angry or have a fight. I want something healthy with tough convos and upfront in your face past the honeymoon phase. I just know that once im married, we're a team- no my money verses ur money, its all together, my debts r ours, my bonuses r ours, i want to be enmeshed. Not clingy, just inlove. I see us spending time apart, but it should be that wed always rather be together.
Plaka neighborhood
Trading 50 jews for 150 Palestinians doesnt make sense to me. That means that i as a woman am worth 3 terrorists.
I love people because i love.
אני מעדיף לדבר איתך ב-4:44 בבוקר, אם צריך
מאשר לדבר בהלוויה שלך.
אין דבר יותר גרוע מלאבד חבר או חברה
שחשבו שאין להם עם מי לדבר.
הטלפון שלי דולק,
הדלת פתוחה
וכוס קפה אפשר למזוג בכל שעה
או להקשיב לך בטלפון.
בואו נתמוך אחד בשני.
תפרסמו את ההודעה הזו
כדי להראות שאתם תמיד שם כשמישהו צריך (ואתם יכולים).
תהיו כאן עבור מי שצריך.
כוחנו באחדותנו
I would rather speak to you at 4:44 in the morning, if you need, than to speak at your funeral.
Theres nothing worse than to lose a friend who thought that they had no one to speak to.
My phone is on,
The door is open,
And a cup of coffee can be poured at any hour
Or to listen to you on the phone.
Lets trust each other
Share this message to show that you will always be there if someone needs (and you are able).
Be there for those who need.
Our power is in our unity
Here's my turn to talk, and id appreciate your hearing what i have to say. Theres a few things you should know:
They offered to take care of zc during the week for those few weeks and you said no because she doesnt do so well after arie crown. Daddy finished learning halfway through all of shas and there was a big siyum for all of chicago on the 9th but mommy didnt want him to go because she thought maybe the Palestinians would show up there, so they made up that hed celebrate the finishing of half shas on sunday with rabbi hamoui (they didnt celebrate with everyone on thursday because one of the regulars was out of town Thursday). The library was an emergency to do that sunday because the Venezuelan guy who finished the deck was also able to take down the library, and it will cost mommy and daddy 1000 dollars versus quotes of costing 8000 by other people. this guy can only do it when its not raining or snowing, so he needed to start knocking it down on while the weather was still good because he cant be on the roof or really do any of it in the rain, and if it would be postponed, the guy would disappear, go to someone else, or the weather would get too bad. So we didnt love being rushed, but sunday was an emergency of getting all the library stuff into the den. No one told you not to come, i think they just told you that that's what was going on. Daddy going to see pa was an emergency just like wjen you were in a car accident was an emergency that daddy left work for when he knew. I dont think anyone knew that this was an emergency. I think everyone thought that when u didnt respond, that meant u were ok, and if it was an emergency, u would have said something in response. If anyone knew it was an emergency, mommy wouldve left work to look after zc. I dont think she knew that it was a- go right now to look after zc- situation. If she did, she wouldve done that in a second. From what i understand, the only times you wanted to bring zc over so you could study were those two sundays. The first sunday she came and i took her to the park, we wanted to have pizza for dinner to celebrate daddys half of shas as a family, but in the end he really didnt feel good, and i didnt either, so we didnt do it. I think we watched zc for as long as we could cuz she didnt want to do anything- she didnt want to take a nap, didnt wanna go on the swings, didnt want to eat. So she went on the slide a few times and then we watched elmo. I can really understand how sucky it is to see someones huge family and know that we dont have that. I think its totally normal to lose trust or alter ur relationship with someone who tried to hurt u. I dont know how fair it is when no one meant to hurt you. I think that they were unaware of how much of an emergency sunday was for you to be able to study, and u were unaware of how important the siyum for daddy finishing half of shas and getting the library cleared was. You didnt have all the facts, and they didnt have all the facts for mommy to know to leave immediately. Its a huge misunderstanding. I hope that knowing this will take a little bit of the hurt and disappointment away. Thats my only goal here, i really dont want u feel pain. I get that having a newborn and a toddler and having a job and taking the test is really a lot. I just want to help this from being another thing added to the list. But in the end, you get to choose what relationships u want with everyone, and what relationships ur kids have with everyone.
I feel like people think im super zionistic
Ok i just talked to a guy on the phone. My voice wasnt shaking. Definitely progress.
Me: im not really zionistic. I just didnt grow up with israeli flags or knowing any Hebrew. Its just not something that ever made me feel anything, and i cant make myself feel something i dont.
Hashem how am i ok. How i am i ok when theres a war. How am i ok when most of my things were thrown out. Yes i fell apart. Yes its hard when you know you wont find the blankets you bought. I wont have the pillows or coats.
I happen to just be obsessed with Jews. I think we are smarter, funnier, more irritating, more caring than any other nation. Israel just has a huge population
U can ask my parents how surprised they were when i said i wanted to move there immediately. It was a total shock because i was signed up to get a four year degree in art. But after learning about israel
In my personal opinion:
Israel is like a furnished apartment. Like the apartments that you see on yad2 where the ad says, "just bring your suitcase, it's totally ready. All that's missing is you". Israel is a country built with the ease of a Jew in mind. You get to act as Jewish as you want- leave early on holidays, take off a bit for your kids bris, the food in the supermarket is kosher, when you walk into a building, you're not the only Jew. I didn't grow up with any of that, and I don't really call myself zionistic. I can't help it, I didn't grow up with flags or knowing the words to hatikva. All I knew was riding camels and that you could ski and swim on the same day. Some Jews live in Israel. Some are stuck outside due to the war. Some go to Israel on trips, and some never go. It's ok to be in Israel, and it's ok to not. Either way you are doing your best. It's special to just know that it's there, like an apartment ready for you to just show up should you be there. I dont know if ill live anywhere else. Maybe I'll live in Cancun, or Paris, or Miami- I have no idea, I'm just here for the ride. But israel is special. There's a completeness in being israel.
its just missing you. To me, thats something that makes israel very special
. But i love israel because i love that israel has lots of jews, and that its the center of us, and that it feels like its always sitting there waiting for us. Whether we are living there, stuck outside because of the war, come on visits, or don't go ever: its always ready for you, whenever and ifever you decide to be there. Like a furnashed apartment. Israel is there, and will always be there. All thats missing is you, and thats the completeness feeling i get when I'm there. Maybe you do too.
When someone does something evil like the school does to me, either you have special needs and youre not aware that what youre doing isnt ok, or it will take you a few more lifetimes to fix what you did. In the end, its not about me, i dont judge you.
Yosef and Yehuda had an ongoing argument about which tribe will produce future kings. Yehuda said it will come from him Yosef said it should come from him because number one, he's a perfect tzaddik, and number two, he knows how to deal with the other nations from his time in Egypt. Spoiler alert, Yehuda wins. Why, you ask? Yosef passed all his tests. Because of this, he would have no mercy or empathy for someone who had a hard life or who made a mistake. He would have been: "You think you had it hard? I had it way worse!" and, "I came out on top, what's your excuse?!" Yehuda made a mistake with Tamar and did teshuva. That's the leader of a nation. We need someone who understands our mistakes and can guide us thrugh it all. Why did Hashem make Moshe the leader of the Jews? The medrash says that when he was a shepherd and one of the sheep strayed, he carried the sheep back to the flock on his shoulders. That's very nice but he was definitely not the only sheppard who cared about sheep. Lots of sheperds care, it's part of the day job. But the medrash continues on that on the way back, Moshe told the sheep, "I must not have given you enough time to drink before, because had I given you enough time, you wouldn't have had to go off alone". Not only does Moshe care, but he takes on the sheeps mistake as his own. That's a leader. That's who is the leader of people. Not someone who's perfect. Someone who knows how to make a mistake and come back from it. That's who will help others come back from their mistakes.
Yosef and Yehuda had an ongoing argument about which tribe will produce the future kings. Yehuda said that it will come from him. Yosef said that it will come from him because number one, he was a perfect tzaddik. And number two, he knows how to deal with the other nations of the world from his time in Egypt. SPOILER ALERT, Yehuda wins this argument.
Here's why. Yosef passed all his tests, came out, YOU ASK? YOSEF PASSED ALL HIS TESTS. BECAUSE OF THIS, HE WOULD HAVE NO MERCY OR EMPATHY FOR SOMEONE WHO HAD A HARD LIFE OR WHO MADE A MISTAKE. HE WOULD HAVE BEEN: "YOU THINK YOU HAD IT HARD? I HAD IT WAY WORSE!" AND, "I CAME OUT ON TOP, WHAT'S YOUR EXCUSE?!" YEHUDA MADE A MISTAKE WITH TAMAR AND DID TESHUVA. THAT'S THE LEADER OF A NATION. WE NEED SOMEONE WHO UNDERSTANDS OUR MISTAKES AND CAN GUIDE US THRUGH IT ALL. WHY DID HASHEM MAKE MOSHE THE LEADER OF THE JEWS? THE MEDRASH SAYS THAT WHEN HE WAS A SHEPHERD AND ONE OF THE SHEEP STRAYED, HE CARRIED THE SHEEP BACK TO THE FLOCK ON HIS SHOULDERS. THAT'S VERY NICE BUT HE WAS DEFINITELY NOT THE ONLY SHEPPARD WHO CARED ABOUT SHEEP. LOTS OF SHEPERDS CARE, IT'S PART OF THE DAY JOB. BUT THE MEDRASH CONTINUES ON THAT ON THE WAY BACK, MOSHE TOLD THE SHEEP, "I MUST NOT HAVE GIVEN YOU ENOUGH TIME TO DRINK BEFORE, BECAUSE HAD I GIVEN YOU ENOUGH TIME, YOU WOULDN'T HAVE HAD TO GO OFF ALONE". NOT ONLY DOES MOSHE CARE, BUT HE TAKES ON THE SHEEPS MISTAKE AS HIS OWN. THAT'S A LEADER. THAT'S WHO IS THE LEADER OF PEOPLE. NOT SOMEONE WHO'S PERFECT. SOMEONE WHO KNOWS HOW TO MAKE A MISTAKE AND COME BACK FROM IT. THAT'S WHO WILL HELP OTHERS COME BACK FROM THEIR MISTAKES.
-Rabbi Wallerstein
School starts in a week and i want to be an artist. Ill show up to school as soon as i can. They can fail me if they want to. But i need to do kibbud av vaem. At 120.5 when i die, i wont be asked if i graduated college. It doesn't actually matter. But i want to know that i did kibbud av vaem. Its always a dance between living the life i want to live and making my parents happy.
Hashem i dont want to be angry. I want this to be my last gilgul. I am so close to you. This past shabbat i started shabbat later than i was supposed to, but i kept it till the end. I hope next week it gets better. I just need to try and be a good person. Be more loving. Be more learned. Be more devoted. Be more caring and gentle and doing the right thing. Just be nice. Be free. And nice. And pretty. And loving.
Don't treat people as bad as they are, treat them as good as you are
There is truth, there is the truth of the truth, and there is peace. The truth is "the boy stole an apple". The truth of the truth is "the boy was hungry". Peace is "nobody stole anything, now give the boy an apple" rabbi nachman
I have a question: if the mizbeach
What happened to the mishkan?
If moshe wouldve built the bais hamikdash and it wouldnt have been destroyed, we wouldnt have gone into galus- why did dovid ever build a bais hamikdash- why wasnt the mishkan good enough
I want to go to tzfat more
I want to go to bat ayin more
I want to connect to all of it
I want to be spiritual and in love life and be happy
I want for everything to be roses. To be authentic to myself. I wish i was one thing. I wish i had one style. I wish i was one of those people who was always can i be pretty hippy and sometimes preppy
Does anyone else think... how did i make aliyah? Like how did i do that?
One part of my brain: how the heck did i make aliyah? I dont think id be able to do it again if i tried
The other part of my brain: well, you were a little smart, a little cute, a little naive, and 20 years old... its definitely easier to move to a foreign country with all that than being 40 and wrinkly.
Jeans with a skirt
2graphicbandtees 2skirtpants
Dresses
I wang to b an artist
I want to see through the program im in
Because im studying art, i want the degree, but if they want to fail me because of attendance and i can only show up 6 weeks from now, thats what ill do cuz when im there, im there alone.
Charlie Harari's speech "our repsonse to the Matzav in Eretz Yisrael"
We almost never hear that someone is a tzaddik in the torah. That's all in the commentary. And then the one place is says straight out "this man, hes a tzaddik" (noach), all the commentators are like "nahhh not really". What's up with that?! What are the commentators getting at that we should learn?
There were two occurances with men being in a teyva- noach and later on, moshe. Noach was told that the world is crazy, build a boat. He built a boat, brought his family in, closed the door, locked it, done.
Moshe was a gilgul (reincarnation) of noach. What happened when Hashem said to Moshe- "hey, I want to start from scratch again and start a nation from you, lets do it". What did Moshe say? "No no no, I'm not gonna be without my nation. And more than that, if you end up carrying that out, take my name out of Your book, I don't want it to be like I ever existed!". Moshe with his message put the whole jewish nation on his boat. He wasnt cool with only knowing his immediate family was ok. And when we realize and act like we are all in the same boat, that achdus is what saves us.
אנחנו כמעט ולא שומעים על זה שמישהו היה צדיק ותורה. זה לא בפשט, זה כתוב אצל המפרשים. והפעם היחיד שכן כתוב ככה ברור (אצל נח), כולם אומרים "לעעע, לא באמת". מה קורה כאן?! מה המפרשים רוצים שנבין? פעמיים כתוב לנו שמישהו היה ב-תבה. נח, ואז יותר מאוחר, משה. לנח ד' אמר כולם משוגעים, תבנה תיבה, תנצל ת'משפחה שלך. הוא בנה תיבה, הכניס את המשפחה הגרעין שלו, סגר ת'דלת, נעול, זהו, סיים. משה היה גילגול של נח. ומה קרה כש-השם אמר למשה אחרי חטא העגל, "יאללה בואו נעשה עם חדש ממך, רק אני אתה ומשפחה הגר��ן שלך, מה אתה אומר?"? מה משה הגילגול של נח שבא לתקן אמר? "לא לא לא, אני לא ��אשר את זה, אני לא רוצה להיות בלי העם שלי! ויותר מזה, אם אתה (השם) עושה את זה, תמחוק ת'שם שלי מכל התורה שלך- אני לא רוצה שיהיה סימן אפילו שהייתי קיים". בזה שמשה אמר ככה, הוא הכניס את כלללל עם ישראל לתיבה שלו. הוא לא היה שביעה מזה שרק המשפחה דרגה ראשונה שלו בסדר. וכשאנחנו מבינים ונוהגים בדרך שכל עם ישראל בסירה אחת, בתיבה אחת, האחדות מביאה הצלחה בכל מעשה ידינו.
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thinking about bubblegum's family too...... which is very much a play on the typical popular girl x nerd trope thats seen in high school dramas but it ends up being a bit sadder. her parents started dating when they were maybe fifteen and her dad was a SUPER socially awkward nerd while her mom was a typically cute fun and popular cheerleader but she asked him out and he was like uhh okay sure?? they dated throughout high school yknow irregardless of what other ppl thought and after that they decided they wanted to be Adults and her dad went to college they bought a house together etc and then of course they got pregnant and had a baby (bubblegum) but when she was like maybe a year or two old her mom went out on errands and she'd always been ditzy and distracted by bubblegum (my beloved btw) so she was talking on the phone while crossing the street and there was a truck driver who wasnt really looking where he was going and yeah she got hit by a car and died. her dad took this VERY hard bcuz they were high school sweethearts and now he was left alone with his tiny baby and no support but his mom/bubblegum's grandma moved in with them to help him thru his grief and eventually said if you dont start actually taking care of your daughter and being there for her im going to fight for custody (this was all when bubblegum was REALLY young like she doesnt remember any of this) and after that he Got Better and was like the best dad ever and it was always him and bubblegum against the world they are very close <3 i always like to joke that bubblegum got the worst traits from both her parents (unlikeable and socially awkward + generally stupid and oblivious to things) but she has lots of good traits too and i love her dearly
i always believed in another universe if bubblegum's mom hadn't died she would have had a baby brother :)
also i guess relevant to say that bubblegum's dad chose to never remarry. personally i think if your spouse dies when you're young its okay to remarry or date other people and its ALSO okay if you decide that you dont want to be with anyone else. its a very personal decision there isnt a wrong answer but it isnt because bubblegum's dad never moved on or got over her its bcuz he didnt want to. he's living a happy and healthy life without romance and thats okay bcuz romantic relationships arent the most important thing in the world
i think bubblegum's parents really have the same vibe as the love letter to end all love letters tbh
"I will love you with no regard to the actions of our enemies or the jealousies of actors. I will love you with no regard to the outrage of certain parents or the boredom of certain friends. I will love you no matter what is served in the world’s cafeterias or what game is played at each and every recess. I will love you no matter how many fire drills we are all forced to endure, and no matter what is drawn upon the blackboard in a blurring, boring chalk. I will love you no matter how many mistakes I make when trying to reduce fractions, and no matter how difficult it is to memorize the periodic table. I will love you no matter what your locker combination was, or how you decided to spend your time during study hall. I will love you no matter how your soccer team performed in the tournament or how many stains I received on my cheerleading uniform. I will love you if I never see you again, and I will love you if I see you every Tuesday."
"I will love you as we find ourselves farther and farther from one another, where once we were so close that we could slip the curved straw, and the long, slender spoon, between our lips and fingers respectively. I will love you until the chances of us running into one another slip from skim to zero, and until your face is fogged by distant memory, and your memory faced by distant fog, and your fog memorized by a distant face, and your distance distanced by the memorized memory of a foggy fog. I will love you no matter where you go and who you see, no matter where you avoid and who you don’t see, and no matter who sees you avoiding where you go. I will love you no matter what happens to you, and no matter how I discover what happens to you, and no matter what happens to me as I discover this, and no matter how I am discovered after what happens to me happens to me as I am discovering this. I will love you if you don’t marry me."
"I will love you if you never marry at all, and never have children, and spend your years wishing you had married me after all, and I must say that on late, cold nights I prefer this scenario out of all the scenarios I have mentioned. That, Beatrice, is how I will love you even as the world goes on its wicked way."
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Highly Abbreviated Plot Summary
So Lowen is hired to ghost write the rest of Verity's novels because she is in a coma now after a car accident. Before the accident, both of her daughters also died; one from an allergy, the other drowned. Lowen stays in Verity's house for a bit to study her notes and read her books as prep. In that time, she falls in love with Jeremy, Verity's husband who takes care of her and their only remaining child, five year old Crew. Jeremy also falls in love with Lowen.
Lowen finds a manuscript of Verity's autobiography. She starts reading it and is horrified to discover that Verity seems to be a twisted fucking cycle path. She claims to have drowned her daughter on purpose, she hates her kids, she is Obsessed with a capital Obsessed with Jeremy. It's kinda icky to read.
During all this time, Lowen is trying not to invade their marriage but is just too in love with this guy. She starts getting paranoid that maybe Verity is faking her coma because she hears noises, things move, locks lock. It's all spooky creepy. Also Lowen has a history of sleepwalking so she gets locks installed on the inside and outside of her bedroom (I don't know).
Eventually everything comes to a head when Lowen finishes reading the autobiography. She finally tells Jeremy that his wife killed their daughter and they go together to confront this allegedly comatose woman. She WAS faking it and Jeremy works with Lowen to make her aspirate some vomit so it looks like an accident.
After a few months, Lowen finds a hidden letter from Verity that reveals her autobiography wasn't what it seemed. She wrote in opposite land! She actually LOVED her kids and she LOVED her Husband and she DIDN'T kill ANYBODY. It was just a writing drill to help get into the villain headspace for her books. But it turns out Jeremy read the autobiography ages ago and already tried to kill Verity. In fact, he tried to strangle her and stopped because he didn't want to get arrested and leave his son alone so he staged the car accident. She recovered but she was so scared that she faked being in a coma until she could figure out how to fix this situation. SHE FAKED BEING IN A COMA FOR ALMOST A YEAR.
Lowen says "Oh shit, Jeremy can never know that we killed her for literally no reason since the autobiography was all fucked." and eats the letter, literally. and then she gets impregnated by Jeremy and they live happily ever after except for this secret she carries. THE END
Now. Let me copy paste the rant I dropped on my friend after I read that stupid fucking ending:
The only thing up there that mattered? Swallowing cum. And it is just to make the ending have a sour taste (like cum) when Lowen swallows the truth letter.
I'm truly in awe at how stupid the ending of this book is. This whole time, i was like okay, parallels between the three kids and the three adults. the repetition of intent not guiding sleepwalking. the sleepwalking being in the book at all. Jeremy being a literally perfect husband and dad. The 7 different locks that are discussed. The repetition of "swallowing." Cooking as connection.
I literally dont know how she wrote this story with all these elements and like. so few actually mean anything. For christ's sake, one daughter died of a peanut allergy and at the end, the son eats a huge dollop of peanut butter. But that doesnt send him to the hospital, no he's not allergic. He just bites a butterknife and it cuts so deep he needs 6 stitches. Why did you write three paragraphs about the peanut butter?
All of this served maybe the worst version of this plot twist. No one killed anybody on purpose until Jeremy kills Verity with Lowen's help. Verity was faking being comatose, literally shitting and pissing herself and not eating and not doing anything for almost a year. That's insane. That's not something a person can do. You would literally go insane from boredom i think.
There are so many locks in the book and i was going to keep track of them but anytime there was a question about if a door was locked, the answer was "i dont remember" from both Jeremy and Lowen.
Hoover also wrote about the basement door being impossible to open if your hands were full in a really confusing way (the door was installed backwards?? okay?). This literally doesnt come up. Lowen goes to the basement and encounters no difficulty with the door.
there are just. So many details in this book that are wasted space. Lowen, as a main character is so fucking annoying. She just automatically believes the last thing she heard even if it contradicts everything she knows. She just kind of drifts through events. She doesnt take action, she's just there to read verity's manuscript and also fuck her husband.
Speaking of the manuscript, I've never seen a plot device this wasted. I was asking the whole time: "Did Jeremy swap his name and Verity's in here? Did he write this?" because there are inconsistent details between life and the book but it turns out Verity just wrote about herself like an evil bitch because... her editor said it was a good idea. The manuscript really reads like a twisted fucking cyclepath writing about himself in third person while dunking on his whore wife.
Okay Colleen, you got me! I thought you were going to do something interesting and you didn't!
Verity's entire plan is also extremely stupid. "I'll pretend to be catatonic for MONTHS until i figure out how to prove i didnt kill our daughters and then i'll kidnap my son and run away from Jeremy" okay. So like, when Lowen threatened you with a knife, why did you just keep pretending. Why are you even here. Take the kid and go, you've had so many opportunities. I feel like i could keep going for another hour.
The twist renders the entire rest of the book stupid. Every hint and clue and theme and parallel ended up being NOTHING. This book PUNISHES a close reading. In my heart, Jeremy masterminded all this just to manufacture consent from an accomplice to help him kill his wife who actually was catatonic the whole time but he gaslit lowen into believing she was a threat until lowen ended it all
the fucking sleepwalking. I just don't understand I do not understand I don't understand. I do not. Why do they repeat the line intention does not guide sleepwalking so many times only for it to not be relevant at all
Why is the housemaid portrayed so creepy if her role is nothing. She hints that maybe she knows Verity is a faker. But like, she never does ANYTHING in the narrative. It paints her as being very staunchly in Verity's corner but nothing comes of that ever. Just a line here or there like "oh i dont want the maid to know we fucked" but like... Why. The maid doesnt know anything about the manuscript.She doesnt know where the big reveal letter is. She doesnt try to help Verity escape. She doesnt try to stop Lowen from doing anything. And all her previous hints were random because she doesnt actually know Verity is fine.
and man i just cannot get over this final sentence. just. woooow lowen has a new perspective on truth because now she's lying to protect jeremy just like Verity did wooooow. She still kind of just believes everything she hears and reads.
She faked her illness because her husband tried to kill her after finding her stupid fucking idiotic Antagonist Journal. The truth she manipulated was being severly ill. And guess what, she really was because NO ONE WOULD EVER DO WHAT SHE DID. SHE ACTUALLY IS CRAZY IT SEEMS
What do you mean which truth was she manipulating???
AND DO YOU KNOW WHAT COLLEEN SAID IN AN INTERVIEW? SHE THINK VERITY IS EVIL. SHE THINKS THE WOMAN WHO WAS STRANGLED TWICE BY HER OWN HUSBAND WAS EVIL.
SPEAKING OF HER STUPID ANTAGONIST JOURNAL if that is how she wrote her novels, they would suck too. There's nothing interesting about a villain protagonist who walks around saying "I'm fucked up and evil and i do bad things because I'm evil" The reason villains as protagonists are interesting is that they dont feel like they are doing the evil thing for evil reasons.
AND ANOTHER THING: Verity based the main character of her novel on Jeremy. So like. That's a huge flag for him being a villain SINCE SHE WRITES FROM A VILLAIN'S POV LIKE THEY SAY 800000 TIMES. and the reveal of Jeremy as the main character of the books is a throwaway line early in the book. So it's perfect as one of many little hints and clues.
I just dont get it. I just don't get why she'd do it like this. Even now i try to justify it like "well maybe im supposed to connect those dots and realize that maybe he is the mastermind and it's scary because Lowen thinks he's safe to be around and the book is over and no one can help her but like. That's not what the ending says. Jeremy is absolved of all sins and it is the two women who bear the weight? it's insane
What's crazy to me is that Colleen wrote his murder scene twice. He tried to kill her the same way twice and i think if i really wanted to i could ctrl+f and see that the scene was copy pasted and slightly altered. He pinned her arms to her side with his knees and "circled" her throat with his hands and the woman in the room thought "crew will lose his father if he does this"
Also, you know, kinda wild how she writes about conceiving babies. like. all you need is no condom and no birth control and it's always a 100% chance. I would have to double check but I know Lowen had just reached the end of her period at the start of her stay. Don't think she was ovulating when Jeremy did the ole cum dump But maybe since he drops a whole cup of semen every time he busts, he can overload that whole ovulation thing. He's very fertile and virile. Oh yeah, there's a blowjob scene where Verity says Jeremy cums so much that she was afraid she would be swallowing forever or something along those lines.
Also, Verity describes post partum depression at great length without calling it post partum depression. And since she writes in opposite land, she actually did love her kids. BUT LOWEN IS LIKE WOW WHAT KIND OF BITCH HATES HER BABIES RIGHT AFTER THEY ARE BORN. It's so wild. Like yes, shame 10% of mothers babe you got this.
I don't think I've ever been so frustrated by a book. The Big twist in Layla was just stupid. The thing that made it frustrating was just how many different times and ways she explained it and also that it was stupid this is stupid, ableist, misogynist, stupid, invalidates the main character, invalidates the love interest, stupid, pointless
it would literally be so easy to save this book by making Verity actually in a coma and making Jeremy actually a psychopath (i mean he kind of is for trying to kill his wife twice and then actually killing her once) but if it had turned out that he actually killed his daughters and then put his wife into a coma then at least all of the little clues would actually be clues instead of just nothing. instead of just one big fat nothing
as the book went on, I kept getting less and less sure of what the twist was going to be. at some point I was even like "Maybe the sleepwalking is another ghost situation like Layla" because I genuinely just could not see any other reason for it to be disscussed so much. she really has a problem actually developing clues
And she has a problem writing relationships she has a problem not being ableist she has a problem with internalized misogyny You know I think maybe she's just not a very good writer. Not that I am one, the most I've ever put into a text document was 30,000 words and this woman has published several books that are wildly popular.
but I don't think that means she's a good writer. she's just better than I am.
The Verity by Colleen Hoover Post
I want to put some of my highlights and notes here so I can reference them without needing the images on my phone. Warning: this book sucks and you will see some really stupid and weird shit in here.
This is the description of blood splashing on Lowen (the main character) after she witnessed a man get run over. I've seen some car accidents. I don't think it's very common at all for someone's head to pop like a water balloon in these circumstances.
What is cryptic here? He (Jeremy, the romance option) has seen worse than a man getting run over. I think it's pretty straight forward, babe.
This is from Verity (jeremy's wife, a comatose woman). Most of her stuff should be taken with a grain of salt for plot reasons but some of these are so ridiculous on their face that you can't really save them
Unlikely.
Licking someone's thumb like a postage stamp is just so FUCKing SExy
I cared, I heard, and I minded. Please don't talk about getting fingered at steak 'n shake
Meeting Jeremy makes you want to jump off a cliff????? Well, to be fair, me too, girl
Why is this how you describe it, Lowen. You are reading her autobiography but you are thinking about her underwear.
Okay, I love this one because there's a lot happening. 1. He walks backwards A LOT in the first half of this book and I don't know why. 2. He was on his way to the kitchen to heat up leftovers but they were already done when they arrived? 3. He pulls out a plate of pizza. So in one very short paragraph we have pizza said three times. I think this book wasn't carefully edited.
So what does that mean. If someone has a plate of peas and they do this, I imagine them poking and prodding and scooping but pizza? Is he like... picking it up and putting it down? Sliding it around the plate?
It's just SO weird to go with your wife to her first pregnancy appointment for the baby you squirted into her, isn't it.
So this is again Verity writing from opposite land but like. They very much do have sex constantly so does she feel this way or not.
This one really bugs me just because she flubbed the parallel structure on "with a broken wrist" and "covered in blood" like the reason we have mechanics for parallel structure is that the sentences feel clunky without it.
I lost count, I didn't highlight every one, but I think this is in the book at least 10 times. Colleen does NOT trust you to remember this.
Lowen, why is this a dammit. Why is that messed up. What.
Just like Layla in the other book, Layla, Lowen is a girl who knows how to eat and she's quirky for eating tacos
So why didn't she just list the vegetables. It would be faster. "He grabbed cilantro and onions." or "He grabbed onions and peppers." Like... Colleen, you live in texas and you write about tacos in your books more than once.
People hate me for suggesting Lowen is bi but..... i mean.... she was diggin through Verity's drawers too, you remember.
Why did anyone let her say epic burn in a book. Why does she use epic again moments later.
Ope, I got this one though.
Thankfully Verity has two breasts.
That's how I felt reading this book. You DO get a feeling that Colleen partially wrote this to call out her haters.
Don't say that
Here's another line that gets repeated like 6 times. I don't even know why. It doesn't play into the plot or the themes really.
God isn't that insane. Who does that. Also this is Verity Opposite land so... does she wear lingerie often?
Babe. What.
Someone pointed out that license picture are usually the worst pictures of you possible. That makes this so much funnier imo
When you say "He groans" as a single clause, it makes it sound like he's disappointed. "Ugh, babe you forgot your bra AGAIN?"
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S2, that showdown at the Byers, except Billy is a little less wound up and Steve is a little more wound up.
Steve is still kinda bitter about Nancy but only in a "we're over but we still need to talk for that closure" kind of way because they did actually break up when Nancy admitted she didnt love him. But Steve still feels he deserves an explanation for the whole "you're bullshit" thing.
But then there's Billy, who flirts with him, and riles him up, and who gave him that absolutely filthy look while they were both naked. And Steve Wants. Cos Billy has been taunting him for what feels like weeks, and then that whole thing in the shower, and his tongue????
Devastating.
And now he's here, wearing that shirt and flirting and his stupid tongue still isnt in his mouth and Steve's got adrenaline pumping from the fighting and the running and the protecting.
And he could just throw a punch or deny Max is here and that would technically help them. But Steve doesnt want to hurt Billy, doesnt want to punch him, Steve wants to get Railed.
All of this culminates in Steve just backing Billy up towards his car before kissing the absolute life out of him.
And Billy is initially like "what the fuck" but also this is his pretty boy who he has been trying to get with since he rolled into this shitty town so yeah fuck everything else lets do this.
Billy flips them, they have the messiest make out session of potentially all time right on the hood of Billy's Camaro. Which is absolutely doing things for both of them.
Unfortunately they dont have time to get any further because then they have the whole "monsters are real lets go set some on fire" conversation.
But then after they drag themselves out of the burning tunnels and drop the kids back at the Byers' they make their excuse that they are going to get Steve's car. Then they drive out into the woods and Billy takes Steve apart in the backseat of his Camaro.
sdfghj omg I love that, thank you so much Anon!!!!🥰💕💕
They'd be so high on adrenaline and knowing they survived something as terrifying as the tunnels together- and Steve's a hormonal mess, just like Billy, probably hasn't gotten laid in a while since Nancy has been struggling too much.
So he's horny. And here's someone who wants him, who clearly has been flirting with Steve in his stupid, overly aggressive way while practically undressing Steve with his eyes. Steve wants to be wanted. He's still heartsore and desperate for... something. For touch. For affection. For someone who won't fucking lie to him.
Billy Hargrove is not a liar. He's an asshole, sure. He may not say everything that's on his mind.
But he invites Steve on a ride once they've dropped off the kids. Looks at Steve like he's seizing him up, not quite certain of how Steve will react when he offers "let's pick things up where we left off, huh?"
It's a tempting offer. Who is Steve to resist? He jumps into Billy's car. Lets warm hands grab his jacket and drag him to the backseat, the strength of another guy manhandling him a shocking, unexpected thrill that get him hard so fast he gets a bit dizzy.
Or maybe that's the lack of oxygen from making out with Billy. Again.
Because Billy Hargrove, as he's already discovered, is very good with his mouth. Even better with his hands, when they hungrily roam over Steve's body- first through fabric, then right on his skin and then lube-slick inside him.
oh god oh god oh god, is all Steve's mind can chant by that point. He's so loose. So stretched out already. Overwhelmed with the way Billy has gone sweat-slick and flushed and beautiful between his legs, muttering how he can't believe Steve is letting him do this. Cock thick and hard between his thighs, promising to fill Steve up even more.
It's a different sort of excitement, the moments leading up to Billy pushing into him. Their breaths mingle. The head pops in. Steve whimpers. Billy pushes forward in slow, unrelenting movement and moans low and drawn out. It's enough to drive a guy crazy, turn him wild and clawing and high on pleasure that's hard to comprehend. It's perfect.
#harringrove#asks#i like the idea of steve feeling guilty for 'using' billy at first#but neither of them is in love at this point and billy is TOTALLY not smitten with the heartbroken pretty boi of his dreams#anyways they totally fuck again and start hanging out and falling in love like complete idiots<333
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“you come in dressed like a stripper...so strip”
pairing: toji fushiguro x female reader
cw: AU, fluff, cheating with Toji, language, implicit mentions of abuse, nsfw (MINORS DNI, kissing, spanking, dry humping, thigh riding, degradation, praise kink, jaw grabbing, male receiving oral, titfucking, clit play, unprotected sex, consensual sex, nipple play, nipple sucking, spit play, blowjob, thigh grabbing, exihibitionism, car sex, semi pervy Toji, assumed age gap)
word count: 5900+
a/n: THIS FIC HAS BEEN POSTED TWICE BUT WON’T SHOW UP IN THE TAGS IF IT DOESNT SHOW UP AGAIN IM DONE AND WILL TRY AND POST IT TOMORROW INSTEAD
other information: jujutsuhub collab by @suna-reversed
summary: in which after gaining an infatuation with your boss you can’t help but flirt with the man, when he realises what your motives truly are he can’t help but take you in his office right for your co-workers to hear
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Every fucking day, every god damn fucking day, you had become an issue for the man. Every day you’d saunter into his office, black heels and that oh so tight skirt that seemed to get shorter every day. Your blouse with a mesh that was almost see through with your bra peeking out of it held your chest on show. He hated it, hated how whenever you bent beside him to pass his coffee, the way your back arched and legs almost looked spread made his trousers become tighter.
Toji had too much to worry about then how his secretary dressed but seeing it right in front of him. The way your ass perked up, your bare thigh on show. Toji leant back on his chair to get a better view of your back as you spoke of upcoming meetings which he already knew of. The pencil skirt made it hard for Toji not to have the urge to slap at your ass. Going against his wants he turned towards your face as you stared down at him with your own coffee in hand.
“As long as the car is on time this time then we shouldn’t have a problem,” he muttered playing with the pencil he had on the left of him.
“Of course, I’ll make sure they’re ready, Sir,” the sound of the single word made him look up at you, every part of you screamed to want to get fucked. But he couldn’t dare touch you, he couldn’t dare touch his stupid little secretary who held a stupid job that she only got through her stupid fiancé, nepotism at its finest.
The golden band around your ring finger made Toji glare, you stupid fiancé, his stupid little worker bee who wasn’t even good at his job had gotten you to become Toji’s secretary. Maybe Toji had allowed it to spite your fiancé or maybe it was to imagine fucking you into his desk every single day. His eyes staring at the metal, some cheap jewellery that adorned your finger as if some lustful insight into your relationship.
“You got a date yet?” Toji watches you freeze as you grab the papers around the desk to organise later.
“For what, sir,” the stress of the term makes the man's jaw clenched, so pretty and yet so young, so full of vitality. He could imagine pushing that face of yours into the mattress as he fucked into you almost groaning out loud at the images in his head.
“What do you think?” He mutters once again more annoyed at how unaware you were as you began to place the files in your hand, licking the tip of your finger to grab a hold of the pages that were stuck together.
You looked up at him, his unamused look, the dark dark hair that matched his personality, the scar across his lip that almost gave him a crude look. He was everything your fiancé wasn’t, with his confidence and wit that came with the calm tone he presented the majority of the time. Your fiancé was caring and that’s all you ever wanted, but with your bosses lingering looks, his sharp movements of his hands that always seemed to graze the back of your thighs. “No sir, we haven’t gotten a date yet, I hear June’s a good time though.”
“Bit far away, doesn’t he want you to be his,” Toji spoke with such a calm tone, but his words and possessiveness sent a shiver down your spine, “if you were mine I’d want that.”
He mumbled the last part out, choosing to ignore the phrase as you thought over the man's words, you had been engaged for a while, you thought of your fiancés surname, Mrs…Mrs…“Mrs. Fushi...”
You didn’t dare stare at the man in front of you, he tried to hide his smirk as he heard you say his surname rather than your husbands, “I didn’t hear that, why don’t you repeat yourself?”
“I…I didn’t say anything…” you whisper out as he looks at you with a knowing smirk.
Standing up as he came closer to you, almost pushing your back against the wooden desk that he had so often thought of fucking you on, “say it again Mrs. Fushiguro.”
His hand attached to your jaw as his thumb traced your lips tentatively as if he was preparing them for something before he could even dare to make a move. The sound of your phone indicating that the driver was here brought the two of you out of each other’s arms. “We need to leave…”
You trailed off wanting to forget about the moment, if you could even call it one, occurring. He watched you grab your bag as you walked out of the office with a click of your heels, his eyes staring at the sway of your hips and the fabric that clung to your skin. He let out a groan as he grabbed his jacket putting it on, he was annoyed at how close he had been to you, how he would have kissed and fucked you in a matter of seconds.
Stepping out of the door as he looked at his stupid little workers, he noticed you being cornered near the door, your fiancés eyes glimmering as the man stared at you. You seemed aloof as you tried to not meet the mans eyes, walking up to you both, Toji looked down at his stupid workers bee. “We need to go,” he spoke stoically as he gripped your wrist, removing you away from your fiancé mid conversation.
“It’s rude to interrupt,” you muttered as you both walked towards the elevator.
“It’s rude to talk in work hours to your stupid fiancé,” he mumbled once again, not bothering to hide hid boredom of the conversation as he let out a yawn.
You shook your head watching how you both stepped foot into the cramped elevator, the way his broad shoulders bumped against your own, you felt suffocated by the way his gaze remained on your body. You hated having to work for such an attractive man, he had it all, the money, the looks, but in his head all he really wanted was you. With that stupid smile and perfect face, your fiancé didn’t deserve you, he did or maybe he just hadn’t gotten his dick wet in a while.
As Toji looked down at you he reminisced on a day he could imagine relationships and what nots but with you, you seemed like a porcelain doll to keep and preserve, maybe all you needed was to be broken.
“I had the new proposal printed off, I’ll give it to you in the car,” you spoke professionally, rummaging through your bag to find the plastic wallet that held the documents. He didn’t care for a meeting at this moment, after your previous mishap his brain had become wild with thoughts and ideas as he looked almost bored at the prospect of spending three hours hearing a proposal.
You both stepped outside of the elevator, walking towards the car as you told the driver the address, Toji already getting in the back as you passed the files to him. Crossing your legs, Toji saw the way your thighs squished together, the way your skirt rose, and your tender delicateness was on show.
Licking his lips as he moved his gaze to your blouse, the buttons holding your cleavage in as he tried to suppress the disgusting thoughts he was having over you. There was an obvious sexual tension between the two of you, but you weren’t one to cheat and he didn’t want to lose his secretary over one fuck.
He flicked through the proposal, grumbling at how shit it was before you sighed already having read it and having an interest in it. “I think the idea is good,” you mumble out yourself, flicking through the notepad you had.
“And how would you know?” Toji questioned staring up at you, he watched as you brushed your hair away from your face, your eyes glued to the notepad and a loud sigh came from your mouth.
“I read the proposal and worked out the numbers it’d work in our favour and with the percentage they’re giving I would go for it,” you mumbled out some figures as Toji played a close eye on the way you flicked the pen between your lips. He finally saw you meet his gaze as you stopped your mumbling, “sorry for stepping out of line.”
“I didn’t realise you knew that much about the proposal,” he saw how the driver was pulling up to the building as you finally gave a reply to him.
It was a statement but sounded ever so sweet to his ears, “that’s my job Sir, to know everything inside and outside concerning you and the business.”
You probably hadn’t even realised what your words held, but Toji did, and he was going to play with this advantage, “inside and out…interesting.”
“What is it Sir?” you noticed the driver stop as you were ready to take your seatbelt off and open the car door.
He stopped you, his hand on your thigh as he turned to the driver, “outside.” The driver knew to never question his superior as he scurried out, not wanting another shouting like last time.
“Is everything okay, Sir?” The stress of the title made his cock grow even more, how sweet and succulent you sounded with one term. “Sir?”
“Can you shut up?” He leant back against the seat, his hand against the window as he played with one strand of his hair, you stayed silent, his other hand brushing against your skirt and thigh as you pushed the muscle together. “Aren’t you the obedient type?”
It almost sounded like a joke as he chuckled lightly but the stoic nature of it made you shiver instead, “Sir, we’re going to be…”
His hand moved closer from your thigh, moving past your skirt as he stared down at his little secretary. “What does he have that I don’t?”
“I don’t understand the question…”
His fingers skimmed to your side, touching the underwear that encompassed your hips as you looked at him with glossed eyes, “you do understand, I see everyday how your skirt gets shorter, your blouse tighter, don’t think I don’t see you whoring yourself out in the office.”
“I haven…”
His hand quickly moved out of your skirt slapping your thigh as a red bruise of a handprint was forming, “you fucking were, you wanna know how fucking hard it is to watch you bend over in that pathetically short skirt, or you leaning over me with your tits in my face.”
“I…” You had become speechless; your toying and teasing had been noticed you had almost given up on any encounter with your boss. You didn’t love your fiancé enough, he wasn’t the one for you, a marriage forced on you both where he had decided to make you his when all you wanted was freedom. All you wanted was Toji.
“Speak up,” he mocked lightly.
You looked down playing with your fingers as you felt his hand grab onto your jaw, forcing you to stare right into his dark eyes, “I w…want you,” you finally croaked out.
“Too bad,” he let go of your jaw as he left the car, the wind and sounds of life outside the car had emerged as you finally looked at yourself in the rear-view mirror. Horrific and disgusted at yourself as you got out of the car and followed your boss to the meeting, three hours of hell to endure.
He was the first to step through the doors, the meeting with some men you’d never met before, but you could spot them from a mile away. White hair with blue tinted sunglasses and an opened up black suit with a blue shirt, he seemed boyish and somebody that Toji would entertain for a bit, the other with black hair that was tied up and his own matching suit in a much deeper rouge . They contrasted one another, stepping through the doors yourself.
Their eyes fixated on you as Toji smirked at the way your entrance had made the two men almost freeze, the black-haired man shaking his head as he nudged his friend. Both introduced one another to Toji as you sat beside your boss. It felt suffocating under his guise, his fingers occasionally tapping against the pen he held as both Geto and Gojo spoke about what they had proposed. You already knew a lot of it, seeing how they were able to speak calmly to a man who was intimidating.
You continued to write down the notes of the meeting, Toji asking occasional questions as they answered sophisticatedly. Toji turned to you, seeing how Gojo had occasionally watched over you taking notes, you seemed to be of interest to the man, which Toji really did hate. “Y/n, you seemed to like what they’re selling, what do you say?”
It sounded like a euphemism as you pushed against the table to finally look up at the three men, staying calm and collected, you were about to talk when you could feel Toji staring right through you as if he was imagining everything he had ever wanted to do to you. “I…I…I like what they’re selling and think….think it would be a good inve…investment.”
You could barely speak as Toji nodded, he trusted your decision and couldn’t lie and say the proposal wasn’t a good one, Geto took him towards his office to print off the paperwork as you were left with Gojo, alone.
“He's your fiancé then,” Gojo asked as he sat on the long wooden desk staring down at you. He had noticed the ring but couldn’t help but ask, having seen a tension for the past three hours between you and your boss.
“No, my fiancé is a colleague,” you muttered slowly, it seemed embarrassing to even speak about your fiancé how much you actually hated the man. Pressing harder on your pen Gojo moved to sit right in front of you, his legs landing on the ground as you turned to face his crystal blue eyes.
Gojo chuckled lightly as he watched you look up to him, “doesn’t seem like you want that.”
“Excuse me,” you were trying to act polite but the urge to tell this man to fuck off was searing through you.
“It's just you and your boss seem very comfy together…” Gojo noticed Toji walking back with Geto, both speaking about something as he leant down to meet your ear. “…as if he wants to have you himself.”
Toji watched as Gojo moved back away from your ear as you looked down, not meeting any of the men’s gaze, “Y/n, if you’re done flirting, we’re leaving.”
“I wasn’t…” you mumble as you quickly grab your stuff and go with the man. His hand resting on the bottom of your back, as he clenched his jaw.
As you both stepped out of the building, the driver looking fearful at the two of you, “get a taxi,” Toji passed the man some money taking the keys as he opened the door for you, Toji taking the driver’s seat with a slam of the door. “You’re my secretary Y/n, stop whoring yourself…”
Toji was left speechless with the way your hand just reached his face, catching your hand as your eyes were glossed and for the first time he saw you vulnerable. “Why…why do you always blame me?”
He dropped your hand as you tried to speak without stuttering but Toji became quiet, “he shouldn’t have touched you…I shouldn’t have touched you.”
Toji looked down as he begin to drive back to the office, he looked up seeing how your gaze had become enchanted with the sunset, “I wanted you…I wanted you so fucking much but you…you just see me as a whore.”
It had been silent when you spoke up, finally collecting your thoughts as you had a new sense of confidence as you were confronting the man, “Y/n…”
“No Sir, you’re listening to me now, you treat me as if I mean nothing to you, I see your lingering looks, I fucking see it and I let it occur because I just wanted you to see me, see past this stupid ring and like me.” His hand stayed firm against the steering wheel as he was seeing the different emotions you felt towards him.
“I fucking see you, I do Y/n, you just…you have a fiancé, you have a custom life ready for you”
You interrupt him, “I…I don’t love him.”
He reverses into the parking spot as he finally meets your eyes, those stupid beautiful eyes, “fuck, Y/n…”
His mouth attaches onto yours, as his large hands cup your face, his tongue gliding past your own as your hands moved into his hair. You almost felt in heaven, as he undid your seatbelt and his own, his hand roaming against your skirt as gripped the back of your thigh to make you sit on his lap. Spit and saliva mixed together as you kissed him with such intensity, his other hand moving to undo the buttons of your blouse, which almost felt like a tear.
He couldn’t help but cup your chest with one of his hands, squeezing and massaging at your fat as one of his fingers played with your hardened nipple. “Fuck…fuck…fuck,” he groaned through the kiss as he felt your cunt through underwear move against his thigh.
Letting go of your mouth as you both stopped kissing, foreheads touching as he looked at you, your finger tracing the scar on his lip, he almost gave out another moan at the feeling. Your lips moving to kiss at the scar as you continued to move your lips on his thigh, “I want you…want you…so badly Sir…”
Your moans filled the car as you continued to move your clothes cunt against his thigh, your head at his shoulder as he moved his mouth down to your tits, undoing your bra as he threw the fabric into the backseat along with your blouse, “you gonna cum just from my thigh, pathetic.”
“Want…want to feel it…” he knew what you wanted, as he continued to circle his tongue around the bud of your nipple. “Want to feel your thi….” Your moans were almost intoxicating as he moved your skirt higher, seeing the way your underwear had become soaked from the movement, he watched as your fingers moved to his belt. The way even though you were trying to concentrate on removing his trousers you still moved your clit against him, he moved his own hips upwards as his trousers moved off of him, lifting your cunt off before landing back on the muscle.
Your eyes fixated on the print of his cock through his black boxers as you moved your hips against his thigh, “we…we should remove these.”
He slapped at your ass as he pulled your underwear, a slight rip occurring as he tugged on it to allow the fabric to stay on you with your cunt on show. “Fuck…To…Toji,” your name in his head had never sounded the way you had just moaned.
He bounced his thigh against your moving hips as his fingers moved to your clit, eyes fixated on the way your tits bounced in front of his eyes. “Say…say it again baby,” he moaned as he could feel his cock become excruciatingly harder.
“Toji…Toji…fuck…faster,” your hair was a mess as he moved his mouth up again, capturing your lips to feel you moan in his mouth. The bouncing of his thigh against your cunt had made him become even hornier, hands roaming your perfect body as he pushed your back against the steering wheel. You were just so perfect as he could see how tired you had become, “cu…cum…”
“You want to cum baby, cum on my thigh, go on…go on baby,” he groaned as his muscle tensed under your clit, your rubbed against him faster as he felt himself wanting to put his cock into you.
You moved faster as you felt the coil in you snap, cum gushing out as his thigh became stained in white, the rubbing between your cunt and his thigh spread the white cum as he looked up at your dazed face. “Pretty, pretty girl…”
“Want…want your cock, Sir,” you mumbled as your hand moved to his cock and the other began to unbutton his white shirt, he placed his hands on top as he gave you a sickly-sweet smirk.
“Let’s have us an audience baby,” you tilted your head as he grabbed your jaw, giving a soft short kiss to you, “you going to sort yourself out and meet me in my office, okay baby.”
“O…Okay sir,” you spoke with a drool coming from your mouth, he moved his thumb to push the drool back in as he watched you go back into your own seat, pulling your skirt down as your underwear had been ruined.
He quickly put his trousers back on, the stains of cum evident on them and his thigh as his hair was a mess from your tugging and you looked fucked out of your mind. He left you to put your shirt and bra on as he went up to his office, waiting for his treat to arrive.
He walked past his workers as they seemed to be getting ready to leave for the night, he looked happier than normal, and the scent of sex lingered against him as he could feel traces of your cum remain on his thigh and clothes. He saw how your fiancé looked at him in confusion, his dishevelled look that made him question where his to be wife was.
Toji went into his office looking around as he was met with the darkness from the sky sneaking through the window as he looked down at the room. Ever since you came you had livened the place up, speaking about how plants would look amazing in the office and then the next day carrying a few as you doted it around the room. Your coat lay on one of the chairs as you had bought an air filter for the room as well.
He looked down at his desk, counting down for your time to come.
You had tried to look as professional as you normally were, but with cum staining your thighs and a lack of underwear which you had thrown in the bin, you looked a mess. You looked at yourself through the mirror in the elevator, trying to smooth out your hair to hide the strands that had become a mess as your face looked a mess.
Smudged lipstick and clumps of mascara across your cheeks, you were praying nobody was in the office, even if Toji wanted an audience you just wanted to finally have the man. You moved the lipstick back onto your lip as you wiped the mascara with your other finger. Before finally stepping out of the elevator, it seemed like luck wasn’t on your side as you saw your fiancé in the office.
Trying to stay hidden as you walk towards Toji’s office without your fiancé noticing you, but the feeling of his hand grabbing your arm seemed to falter your plans. “We’re going home,” he mumbled as he watched your chest heave, one of the top buttons being almost ripped off.
“I have to finish this proposal off,” you lied trying to shake his hand off of you.
“You can do it tomorrow…” before you could even speak, the sound of Toji made both of you look at the man, he looked smug as he walked towards you both.
“She really can’t, I’ll drop her back home when we’re done,” your fiancé clenched his jaw as Toji removed his hand off your arm and led you into his office, “we’ll only be an hour or two.”
Your fiancé gave a pissed off look as he watched how Toji’s hand moved to your ass just as you both walked into his office. The sound of the lock making your fiancé know exactly what was to occur and knowing he could do nothing about it.
“You come in dressed like a stripper...so strip,” Toji spoke as he leant against his desk, arms crossed as you looked at him with doe eyes.
You moved closer to him as you smirked, “help me,” you whined as he rolled his eyes.
His hands on an instant pulling at your buttons, some even falling to the floor. He undid your bra as his mouth moved onto one of your tits sucking at it as he left a string of saliva from your nipple to his mouth. “Ya gonna let me fuck these,” he mumbled as all his dreams were about to come true.
You nodded as his hands moved to pull your skirt down, his finger moving along your clit right to the bud as he pressed against it, “I’m gonna make you forget all about him.”
“Want…want to only think about you,” you mumbled as he moved you towards his desk chair. He shook off his jacket and started to undo his shirt buttons. You licked your lips as you watched him teasingly undo each button, you had sat on top of his desk, as he could see how puffed your clit had become just from thigh fucking him.
Undoing his trousers as you could see your cum stains still on his thigh, your eyes fixated on his hard cock that was just waiting for your mouth. He grabbed a fistful of your hair to force you to look up at him, “gotta get this mouth ready baby,” the sound of spit building up in his mouth was heard as he watched you open up, your tongue hanging out to taste the spit in your mouth.
“To…Toji more,” you groaned as your hand moved to pull at his boxers, he let you do it, watching as his cock sprung up against his stomach. You began to leave the red marks of lipstick against his neck and chest before you pushed him onto his chair, letting you fall to your knees. “Wan…want to make you happy?” You mewled with your legs pushed together, Toji watched as you were at the perfect height to give him what he wanted.
Your tongue licked from the base right to tip as the groan of your name came from his lips, he watched as you cupped at your breasts, letting both fall to the sides of Toji’s dick as you pushed both to rub against his dick, moving them back and forth. Toji felt in heaven, he had wished for this since he had seen how tight your blouses had become.
His eyes watching how each time the precum leaked out it helped your chest to move back and forth against his cock. He hadn’t expected your mouth to be ready for his cock, as just as your breasts moved back down your mouth covered the tip, kitten licking at the blushed tip you circled your tongue against it. Watching as Toji’s hands gripped onto your head to push you to take more of his cock, your droll dripped down onto your breasts as you moved them quicker along his cock.
Toji could feel his own orgasm hit as you moved quicker, each time sucking on his cock for a bit longer to get him to snap on your tits and mouth. “Fu…fuck Y/n, faster.”
He groaned out as he watched you move quicker, the way the smudges or red encompassed his cock and how obedient you were to him, “cum…fuck Toji…cum in my…mouth,” you mumbled as each time you took his tip in your mouth.
“Fuck,” he groaned as cum spluttered on the inside of your mouth and against your tits. You let go of his cock as he looked down at you, cum dripping from your breasts as it fell to your stomach and the way you swallowed the cum as he saw the string of cum encompassed your mouth. “Want me to fuck you baby, you want my cock?”
You nodded eagerly as he grabbed onto your waist as you stood up, putting you on his lap as he turned his chair to look out into the night sky. “Want your cock,” you moved your hips against his cock, wanting to feel it get hard as your hand moved to touch it.
He groaned as he looked at you softly, “gonna fill you up baby, show them who you belong too.”
He didn’t leave any room for you to reply as he moved your cunt right on top of his cock, letting you sink in with a heavy moan at the feeling of being filled right up. “Go…good girl, taking me all,” he kissed you softly as his hands moved to move your hips up and down as you rested your head against his chest. “I’m going to take care of you princess, gonna make you happy.”
Toji didn’t know what he was saying. Maybe it was the fact your cunt was squeezing at his cock as you moved your hips or the intimacy he felt as you laid on his broad chest, kissing at his chest softly. “I want to be with you,” it was the first coherent sentence you had made since he had begun fucking you, but he knew it was the truth.
He watched you moan softly against his chest as he looked out to the sky, he wanted to make you feel happy, softly moving his cock in and out of your walls each time going deeper and faster into your cunt. His hand had gravitated to your clit as he played with the numb hearing you mewl against him and occasionally give out a loud groan of his name.
You seemed at peace with his cock stuffed into you, he normally hated slow sex, hated the fact he couldn’t quickly make you cum. But with you, he felt secure to do something like this, because you were never going to leave him.
You gave him a tearful look as he brushed your hair away from your eyes, wiping the tears as he kissed you softly, as both your tongues moved together. He felt you move against his cock, lifting yourself up before slamming back down as if you knew your orgasm was coming.
He continued to kiss you, hands cupping your face as he let you move your cunt back and forth against his cock. You had been wet enough to take him well, he was almost surprised that you had barely complained about his size but knew that you would be complaining about feeling broken any time soon.
“Cu…cum…” you mumbled through the kiss as you wrapped your arms around his neck to deepen the kiss.
He groaned feeling his own orgasm come as he moved his hips to move further into you, hitting the back of your cervix each time, “gonna…fuck, gonna fill you up baby.”
At the sound of that you let out a moan as the white gush fell from your cunt, the way he moved easily through your cum to move faster into your cunt, he watched as you kissed at his neck, red stains continuing to form against his neck as he rolled his eyes feeling his own cum shoot out of his cock and into your cunt.
He watched how dazed you had become, the way he softly came out of your cunt, placing you against the desk, as he pushed the cum back into your cunt with one finger. He knew you had no underwear and would need something to keep it in till you could get rid of it. But it almost turned him on at how you looked there lying, tired out of your mind. He kissed softly at your clit as he moved his finger to let the cum seep out onto the desk.
He left you there as he went to find some spare clothes in one of the cabinets, passing you them as you finally looked up at him. “Sorry for ruining your desk,” you said, realising his desk had been covered in sweat and slick.
“I could make you clean it up with your mouth,” he mumbled as he helped you put the shirt on, it was too big for you as he did the buttons and gave a slap of your ass as you turned to get the boxers and skirt you had worn this morning.
“Toji…” you groaned as he smirked, putting his own clothes on.
He touches your ass with both his hands cupping it as he leans his frame against your shoulders, “it’s just so pretty baby, want to fuck you there now.”
“How are you still horny?” you spoke as you turned, wrapping your arms around his neck, “next time you can.”
He smirked kissing you softly as he gripped onto your ass not caring if he left a bruise or not, “think they heard.” He questioned as you shrugged, almost hoping they didn’t, “come on, I said I’d drop you home.”
“I don’t want to go home…he’ll be there,” you spoke sadly as you grabbed your bag. Toji looked up at you in confusion as he went to unlock the door. He had semi wiped the desk but knew he’d have to clean it properly tomorrow.
“Who said I was taking you there, princess?” He chuckled as he grabbed your hand, letting you out of the door first.
Both your eyes met the face of your fiancé as he looked at you with fury in his eyes, “you fucking whore.”
You stayed silent almost standing behind Toji out of fear of what he might do, “what are you doing here?”
“I…You slept with my fucking fiancé,” a red fury ran through him as you looked at Toji, who had a smile on his face.
“Ex-fiancé, you weren’t satisfying her needs,” he smirked as he gripped onto your hand. Your fiancé was ready to pounce on Toji, but the man spoke before he could do anything else, “your desk should be cleared by tonight and I’ll expect your key card and keys to be on your desk tomorrow.”
“You…you can’t fire me,” everything to do with you seemed gone as the man stood in front of you. You knew the amount of money someone of his standing had been getting that’s why he had been able to get you the secretary job but at the click of Toji’s fingers it had all gone.
Toji moved past your fiancé as he held you close by him, “I just did, now you’re wasting more of my time by talking, when all I want is to fuck Y/n.”
“She’s a fucking whore, she’ll sleep with someone else and fuck you over too,” your ex shouted in a disarray as you turned to meet his eye.
You removed the ring and threw it at him, “I deserved better than having someone who forced a marriage onto me.”
Both you and Toji looked at one another as he gripped your hand leaving your fiancé jobless and alone. “Toji…” you muttered as you went into his car, he looked at you softly waiting to hear your question, “do you…do you want something between us?”
“That’s a stupid question Y/n,” you looked down playing with your fingers as Toji grabbed onto them, “you’re what I want Y/n, plus fucking you is a bonus.”
He chuckled as you playfully hit his arm rolling your eyes as you hoped that this new relationship would prosper.
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Delta Squared Chapter 1
A/N: So, this story is somewhat based off of Think Like a Man, I thought our favourite boys would fit these tropes quite nicely and wanted to write something fun and kinda silly! I hope can enjoy, even if you have seen the movie because I did make changes :) This will have several chapters, but hoping to keep it easy to follow. This chapter focuses on the boys and Benny. No smut, no warnings really except a few swear words. 2.4k words
It all starts sometime in May, the boys’ weekly outing causing the fates to set you up in front of the TV at just the right time. Well, sort of started then.
###
(01:23 am) Tom wtffff
(01:23 am) im hiding in the bathroom from that weird girl who smelled like burritos next to us
(01:24 am) can i come out yet
(01:26 am) dunno
(01:26 am) but brb
(01:26 am) santi’s helping me get this girl off my back
(01:26 am) so the one who was basically following me is gone?
(01:28 am) also what youre engaged
(01:28 am) just show her a pic of Mads
(01:30 am) true lol
(01:31 am) im just gonna come back
(01:31 am) if shes standing right outside the bathroom ill scream
(01:32 am) idk what ur talking about but will made a face so maybe he knows who you mean
(01:32 am) then again that might just be him pining
(01:32 am) for that girl
(01:32 am) who broke up with him bc he quit his job
(01:32 am) the one hes been "dating" for 2 weeks
(01:32 am) OH
(01:32 am) santi and fish are trying to tag team this girl
(01:32 am) tag team?
(01:32 am) santi and fish are drunk af
(01:32 am) doesnt mean theyre not gonna do it
(01:35 am) uh yeah it does but whatever im on my way
###
Benny emerges from the haven of the bathroom, immediately making a beeline for the boys’ table. Thankfully, the girl who seemed to be at his elbow at every turn was nowhere to be seen. Even halfway across the bar, Benny could see Santiago chatting up some poor unsuspecting woman and wonders to himself with amusement which line he went with this time, the player that he is. He’s ridiculously successful at this, always has been, even in their time in Delta Force, his ability to charm anybody and everybody driving the boys nuts. Frankie had apparently given up the tag team idea, and let him run his game, choosing to watch from the sidelines.
Benny checks his phone to see if he got a text from you, sending one out asking how you’re feeling. He feels bad for leaving you at home, sick, but you had insisted he go out with the boys, claiming you’ll join them next time. You two had been dating for years now, bordering on 8, your relationship having been an undefined thing at first due to his back and forth in the military. Once he had come back for good, it was almost too simple how you two had made things official, falling into a routine as easy as breathing. But still… he hadn’t proposed yet.
You were a relatively successful hairstylist, owned your own salon, got along with the boys, matched his energy for all the dorky movies he was into, and incredibly chill with his energy it was almost too good to be true. You even dressed up with him in a couples costume of Han and Leia that one halloween, binging the movies with him throughout the month to prepare for the role. So, you could be forgiven for mistaking the little velvet box he got you last valentines day for a ring, screaming out “Yes!” until you opened it to see a simple but pretty pair of diamond studs. You didn’t understand why he was waiting, you two lived together, shared a car, planned for your future; the domesticity of your relationship was so deeply ingrained in your bones, everyone already assumed you were married until they noticed the empty space where your ring should be. You didn’t want to pressure him, though. He was your Benny, your best friend, and you loved him so much. Star Wars posters, figurines, and all.
You flipped through the channels at home, eventually landing on Oprah, recognizing her guest as Steve Harvey, the host from Family Feud.
“Welcome back, everybody. We are still here with best-selling author Steve Harvey. (Camera switch to Steve) - Well, what I try to get women to understand is that times have changed, but your playbook hasn't. I've gotten thousands of letters from all kinds of women who can't seem to find a man, keep a man or get what they want from their man. Until you understand how a man loves, how a man operates, how he thinks, until you get into the mindset of a man, you will never win with us in the game of love.”
Despite your better judgement, you stayed on the channel to see what new information he could possibly be adding to the world of love advice.
“We have a question in the audience. (camera turns to woman in the audience)- Hi, Steve. I've been living with my boyfriend for five years and he says that he loves me and he's fully committed. I guess what I want to know is, how come he hasn't popped the question?- (camera turns to Steve) He hasn't popped the question because you haven't required him to.”
You roll your eyes at the pedantic answer, but stay listening to see if you could get anything useful out of this.
###
Benny catches part of Santi’s words to the girl on his way to the table, and the tail end of it has him quickly covering his mouth to hide his laughter.
“I’m sorry, but Jesus has my heart.” The girl had said.
“Yeah, no, no, no, I get that. I love Jesus, too. They actually used to call me Pope back in the military,” Santiago countered, sure that he’d walk away with her number.
“You boys won’t believe how Santi’s trynna pick up this girl,” Benny says, jerking his thumb over his shoulder as he joins the others at the table.
“Oh I can already imagine it’s weird, she gave me crazy vibes just by the way she was trying to touch Tom’s beard after 2 seconds,” Frankie laughed.
Santi returns to the table sooner than any of them would have guessed, and they assume he got shot down - rare, but it does happen.
“No luck?” Will asks, a little eager to share his misery with someone else at the table. Will’s most recent venture into finding love ended as pathetically as his last; he was too much of a dreamer to keep a steady job after returning home. Apparently, the women he was going on dates with didn’t appreciate his goal of finding something he was passionate about. He just wanted someone to support him, the same way he would give his full support for his partner.
Santiago looked at each of his friends’ faces and then broke out into a smug smile, “No, I got it. Cmon, you guys really thought I couldn’t? Have some faith.”
The last comment had Benny cracking up again, and he checked his phone again to see if you’d replied.
“How’s Daph doin’?” Will asks his little brother, eyes catching him checking his phone periodically.
“She’s alright, she-” He starts but gets cut off by Fish.
“She's phenomenal, pendejo, we don’t understand why she’s with you,” Frankie laughs, and Santi joins in.
“Nobody does! How good is your credit score? Do you even know how to check your credit score?”
They all laugh at that, Benny included.
“Daphne is amazing, you guys are right. She even loves my nerdy shit. Will doesn’t even like my nerdy shit,” Benny elbows his older brother.
“You sure about that? Maybe she just loves you. Deep down inside, she’s probably thinking ‘this is some silly ass shit’” Tom counters with his eyebrows raised, challenging him.
Out of them all, Tom had the least complicated relationship. He just wanted to make Madison happy, simple as that, and Mads felt the same towards him. He was usually the one giving level headed advice around the table whenever the boys would bring up their lady problems, and as much as they wouldn’t want to hear it at first, they usually conceded, knowing he was being reasonable.
“Nah, I know her, alright? She is just as into all of that as I am.”
The night goes on in a similar fashion, catching up and teasing, until Tom stands up, stating that he needs to get back to his fiancé, making the others groan in displeasure.
“When's the wedding again, Tom? You’ll have all the time in the world, laaaaaater,” Santi gripes.
“You guys still have to take me out for my Bachelor party, how do you not know when the wedding is? It’s next- No, you know what? You can figure it out and plan it when you’re sober, I’m heading out!”
They all chimed in for their goodbyes, knowing they’d see each other in a few days. Benny started to rise from his seat as well, finishing off the last of his beer before announcing his departure.
“Gotta get back to my girl, she’s not feelin’ too well.”
“Yeah, I should go, too, gotta pick up my kid from my mom tomorrow.” Frankie adds, also getting up from his place.
Santiago and Will share a look which doesn’t go unnoticed by Frankie, who immediately gets defensive, “What?”
“Don’t lie to us Fish, you’re gonna go there tonight and she’s gonna give you your onesie and tuck you in the same way she does for your kid!”
Santiago’s never let go of an opportunity to rip on Frankie’s relationship with his mother. Everybody knew he was a momma’s boy, but now he uses his daughter as an excuse for why he’s over all the time. She cooks all his meals, she does his laundry for him, they even have matching pyjamas which they wear on their movie nights together. He stops by on his way home from work because she’s made his favourite dish, or picked up those socks he likes from Costco. Santiago is only teasing but it’s become glaringly obvious that for all that he complains about being a single dad, Fish doesn’t really make time for another woman in his life.
“Yeah, yeah, whatever, Pope. Don’t come asking for her pie next time you’re over.”
“Now hey-” Threats were getting serious, Santiago had to back up a bit.
###
The first bomb had been dropped.
The next day had you heading to your local bookstore, with your notebook in hand, filled with scribbles of tips from Steve. You had finished the episode of Oprah, surprised to have found some possibly useful ideas to push Benny to the next step in your relationship. Looking for his book, you tell yourself you’re not tricking him, you’re just trying to move forward in your life together.
Settling in to read for a bit before Benny came home, you found the chapter that focuses on “The Non-committer”, aka your Golden Retriever boyfriend, which described how you need to require him to step up and propose. Your last birthday, the boys came over for dinner; they treated you like one of their own, which was wonderful! Except that it was your birthday, and you were dressed for a romantic dinner for two. You really were one of the boys. Speaking of which, you looked around, noticing how much your shared apartment looked like a college dorm room, one that housed several boys, not the sophisticated adult space you always envisioned. You develop an idea, one that might upset him but that will overall clean up the place and make it look like two working adults live there. There’s a used bong on his favoured side of the couch for fuck’s sake.
Yeah, that’s it, the first move has already formed in your head, your calculating gaze sweeping across your living room making note of what you’re going to keep and what’s going in storage. The couch will have to wait for another day, you can’t lift it on your own.
Later that evening, Benny comes home while you’re making dinner, chicken wings and fries - not your guilty mind telling you to make his favourite, nope - and his joyful shout at the smell makes your stomach twirl happily. After all these years, his easy smile and comforting presence is still your favourite thing in the world and you want to never stop seeing it. On his way to kiss your cheek in greeting, he catches a glimpse of the drastically different living room space and stops mid-walk, body visibly frozen in shock.
“Babe! Did we get robbed?! Where’s all of my posters, my figurines?! How did you not notice we got robbed?!!” He’s rushing to inspect the empty spaces.
“Relax, I just tidied up a bit,” you try to keep your voice even and light. “They’re safe, Vader’s safe. I just thought we could paint the living room.”
He exhales in relief, painting he could deal with, painting he could work with.
“...and redecorate,” you say under your breath.
“Redecorate?” Benny echoes, confusion taking up his pretty face. “I thought you liked that stuff, why would you wanna redecorate?”
Dropping the last of the wings into the deep fryer you turn to face him fully. “Because, Benny, it looks like we’re still in college. We’re adults, we make decent money, don’t you want this to look like a real home? One where all of our friends haven’t had sex on our couch?”
“What’s wrong with my couch?”
“Baby, it has duct tape holding the back together. We’ve literally had it for ages, and God knows how many times you’ve spilled your bong on it!”
“This couch has history!”
You just level him with a look, before showing him the couch catalogue you were browsing, pointing out the ones you thought he’d like.
“I’d rather watch How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days with you again than couch shop,” Benny grumbles.
“I know you would because I caught you watching it by yourself a week later. Cmonnnn Benny, it smells so bad.”
“Okay, fine but listen I’m really bad at this. Can you just do it without me? I trust you to pick one. Please?” He leans in to kiss your cheek and heads straight for the deep fryer, gathering the rest of the food to set out for the two of you.
Surprise colours your face but you’ll take the win. New couch, slightly more adult space, this was shaping up to be a productive evening. The two of you ate dinner, Benny making loud noises of enjoyment from the guilt-wings you made, watching your post-work show together. These are the moments you loved, the simple comfort of each other’s presence, of having your best friend there at the end of every day.
#triple frontier#triple frontier fic#benny miller#benny miller x female reader#will miller#santiago garcia#frankie morales#mona writes???
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