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neptuneiris · 1 year ago

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sparks (03/04)

Did i drive you away?

pairing: business-boyfriend!aemond x fem!reader

summary: at the beginning your relationship with aemond is perfect and there were no worries. until he becomes the Heir of his father's company, the most important in the whole country and certain events and certain people start to interfere in the relationship.

word count: 8.8k

previous part • next part • series masterlist

there will be an epilogue coming soon!

here it is finally! thank God!

I'm so sorry for the delay beautiful people, it's been heavy weeks where I was writing parts but I couldn't finish them, so my writing time was extended more because I didn't finish, plus I moved, my cat is lost and I've felt very sad about that, besides college, presentations and more, but seriously I love writing, it's my way to escape, so I didn't feel any pressure, don't worry about it :)

I hope you like this new chapter a lot, I'll be waiting for your comments, so enjoy and thank you so much for your patience and support!

In the midst of your relationship with Aemond, things between the two of you are charged with tension.

After the conversation with his grandsire, Aemond's suspicions could not have been more accurate because of the way he behaved. Despite everything he told him and left him thinking about the future of the company, he still tried to talk to you about it.

But you, again, did not let him.

Aemond had to go back to work, just as you also went back to taking care of your own responsibilities such as college.

Aemond's life was still immersed in a whirlwind of responsibilities and commitments. From the moment he woke up, got ready and set foot inside the company, he was already doomed to a busy day.

He had to attend meetings with his key executives, discuss financial analysis, take online conferences, answer emails, calls with partners and clients.

Every moment his desk was filled with reports, financial projections, documents and more that he had to review in detail. Not to mention that the partnership with Alys Rivers is still ongoing.

Still he would make the effort to get home early and spend time with you, every night making an attempt to talk to you about what happened that night, but you wouldn't let him, as you had things to do as well.

If not college, then work, besides having to clean the apartment, do laundry and make food, which Aemond offered to help you with, but the two of you feel completely distant from each other.

Because both he and you know that things between the two of you just aren't right.

They are not since that one night nor does it help you to read every moment in the magazines how Alys Rivers has been seen entering the Targaryen building, where Aemond is always mentioned as well and he assures you that they only had meetings even though you don't even question him about it anymore.

Each of you is immersed in your own thoughts, Aemond feeling helpless, frustrated and sad, his gaze reflected by a deep regret in his heart at not being right with you.

And although he wants to find a way to fix things, you don't want to create any more problems, more than anything else you don't want to interfere between his grandsire and him.

And as the days turn into weeks, communication is no longer paramount, the whole relationship feeling like emotional paralysis, with no clear path of how to reconnect where you hide in your to-do's and Aemond barely has time to spend time with you.

So you find it easier to forget about it and wait for him to do it too. But inside you are still just as hurt, humiliated and sad.

And that little free time he has left for you is simply not enough to try to talk to you, besides you won't let him.

Until that time of the year when Aemond has to travel to attend social events or board meetings, also to meet with his partners around the country to oversee the expansion of the company.

Until he tells you that the first trip will be to Storm's End with his brother Aegon, then to Highgarden and Winterfell with Helaena and at the end to Casterly Rock… with Alys Rivers.

And that you definitely don't like to hear.

"I'm not traveling with her, we're just meeting there for the event."

He lets you know as he starts packing his bags for this two-week trip and you help him out, because even though you're both going through a silent fight, you still care about him and have always helped him with this kind of thing.

But you do feel that discomfort all over you knowing that she is also going on a trip to the same place as him. And Aemond knows it as he watches you out of the corner of his eye, knowing your mannerisms very well.

"Eleanor and Cole will be with me the whole time," he tells you softly, "And I'm already preparing everything with my publicity team for when the press starts publishing pictures of her and me, I don't—

"It's okay," you tell him softly, placing his ties perfectly in the suitcase, "I understand."

He watches you for a few seconds without saying anything, as you continue to put his clothes away the right way, feeling his gaze on you but not watching him back, to which he lets out a long breath.

"I just want to make sure you'll be okay," he tells you just as softly as before, getting up to stand next to you, "I don't want you to be worried all the time. You know I would never do anything to hurt you."

You press your lips together, watching him for a few moments to refocus on the suitcase.

"Yes, I know," you tell him to cut the subject short, saying nothing more.

At this Aemond watches you with some sadness, concern and anguish, but at the same time with love and tenderness, desperately longing for you to share more of your thoughts and emotions with him without pressuring you.

But since he knows you won't, he chooses to hug you.

And he does it carefully, tactfully, knowing that at any moment you may push him away, but to his surprise, you feel your high barriers of defense crumble at that moment, his gesture catching you off guard.

And you with a little hesitation, in the end decide to hug him back, since of course you missed him just as much as he missed you, both of you sinking into a soft and comforting embrace, where finally just for that moment, everything feels right.

There is hope.

Aemond feels his whole body stop tensing the moment he feels your arms wrap around him to hug him back, he lets out a long breath and pulls you tighter against him, hiding his face in your neck.

And you hide your face in his chest too, inhaling his comforting scent, feeling at home again.

"You know you can come with me, right?"

He murmurs in your ear, making you smile softly against his chest.

"I'd love to but I can't. I have to work and attend my classes."

He lets out a resigned sigh.

"Then on your vacation we'll arrange a trip, I promise," he tells you then leaves a soft, tender kiss on your forehead.

You raise your gaze to him as he lowers his so he can watch you.

"Like when you took me to Winterfell?"

"Yes," he smiles softly, "Now where would you like to go?"

"I don't know," you shrug, "Maybe to the Iron Islands?"

"Perfect."

He tells you then leaves a soft kiss on your lips which you reciprocate, both of you pulling each other back into a tight embrace where neither of you want to let go.

And even though Aemond doesn't want to ruin the moment and the fact that possibly this invisible barrier between the two of you will no longer be there, he feels it's the perfect time for you both to talk about the topic you've been putting off that needs to be talked about.

"Y/N, about that ni—

"We need to keep packing."

You interrupt him instantly, gently pulling away from him and turning your gaze back to his suitcases, causing him to look at you sadly for a few moments.

"But—

"I'll go get your shoes."

You cut him off again, to start to move away from him and head towards the huge closet, leaving him with no choice since you definitely don't want to talk about it.

After that moment you both went through, that comforting moment, fortunately you don't feel that emotional distance anymore, since now you both sleep hugging each other, share breakfast and dinner together, also share about how the day went, like before.

Even on some nights there are movie nights, where finally Aemond finds that comfort in your arms, hugging and kissing you at almost every moment.

And you too after a stressful day at work or you are going through a lot of stress because of your classes, you hide from the world in his arms, feeling good and being that exactly what you need.

Until the day comes.

Aemond has to leave.

You drive him to the airport, where his private jet will be waiting for him along with Cole, Eleonor, you understand, his agent as well, and other security people.

The goodbye is hard, even though he's had to leave for business trips before, so neither of you know why. And by the time Aemond's jet flies, that discomfort returns throughout your body and so does that uneasiness.

At all times he lets you know of what he's doing, or at least the important things, like that he's already landed and also that he's already arrived at Aegon and Cassandra's penthouse where he'll be staying.

Before when he went on a trip he also did the same, letting you know where he is and what he will do, mostly to keep you informed, even now he sends you pictures of his breakfasts and also some views from Aegon's house.

You are more concerned that he is well and of course being miles away, it makes you feel safe that he talks to you about what he is doing and what he will do next, like attending those social events which is what he travels mainly for.

Until the day of the important event arrives.

Being at work, about to finish your shift, obviously you are not allowed to have your phone at hand, but when the time comes and now you have to go to class, when you look at your phone, you see severe messages from Aemond and also the notification of a link to a magazine.

This immediately tells you bad news.

And it definitely is when you read the title of what the magazine link is about.

Alys Rivers, co-owner of Riverlands Group seen at Storm's End… click for more.

You click on the link, curious, attentive and with a frown on your face.

The very famous businesswoman, soon to be partner of the important company Targaryen Inc, Alys Rivers has been spotted at Storm's End to attend an event attended by the most important businessmen from all over the country, among them, Aemond Targaryen. She has been spotted an early partnership between them but rumor has it that there may be more than just a partner relationship. We have also been informed that Rivers will be attending the same events as Targaryen in some parts of Westeros where Targaryen Incorporation has distributions of his company, so it is no coincidence.

After reading this, you read Aemond's messages, getting an idea of what they are about.

And you… you don't even know what to think anymore, let alone feel.

It makes sense that he didn't know anything, since at this point after what happened with his grandsire, it doesn't surprise you that he didn't tell him anything because he knew Aemond would do something to prevent it.

And how convenient that also Alys didn't report anything about her presence at all the other events since it was only known that she would travel to Casterly Rock.

Later that day you see how Alys does indeed show up at the Storm's End event and Aemond quickly sends you a picture of everything, of him with Aegon, Cole and Eleonor, wanting to make you feel at peace and safe.

Then later he sends you picture of him arriving to his hotel room, he even sends you a voice message telling you about everything that happened at the event, he tells you that Alys talked to him, that again she tried to cross physical boundaries but he wouldn't let her.

Also that they both had to take pictures together, but nothing else.

And the next morning there are a lot of videos and photos of the event where he is with his brother, his partner Borros Baratheon and more businessmen.

There are also the photos of him with Alys, even videos where the two of them talk and she again touches him on the shoulder and arm like that, smiling flirtatiously at him all the time, but Aemond turns away from her to go to some men.

It's as if she knows that at that moment there are many cameras around and they are recording, so you get the impression that she is doing it on purpose.

But all you can do is really nothing since Aemond is the one telling you everything to make you feel calm, so you just continue with your daily routine, focusing on work and your classes.

Although of course unconsciously your mind is on Aemond and his trip, also on her.

Fortunately what comes next is more… relaxing.

The next event is in Highgarden, where once Aemond lands, he sends you a picture of him with Helaena, where he tells you that she sends you greetings, both smiling at the camera, making you feel a comforting warmth all over your chest as you see the picture, smiling softly.

During the whole trip in Highgarden there is nowhere where Aemond is not with Hel, even in the event when he is around Rivers, Hel is always with them.

The same happens in Winterfell, as Hel must also attend as she is the one who made the partnership with the Starks possible.

Aemond sends you picture of her very comfortable on one of the jet couches, also of the two of them having dinner and watching a movie, even at the hotel they both ask for a room for the two of them with two beds.

At the event also the two of them are together, there is even a very professional photo of the two of them with their partner, Cregan Stark, where he with Hel give a welcome speech to all the guests and then Aemond with him make known the innovations in their companies thanks to the partnership.

It's simply all work, as it should be. You even see Rivers in some photos and videos, but compared to Storm's End, she doesn't look very pleased lately.

Until the moment comes when Hel will no longer be in Aemond's company. And from then on, you can't help but feel uneasy.

And apparently Aemond also feels the same restlessness as you do despite the miles of distance that separate you.

He sends you pictures of absolutely everything, from the moment he starts his day until it ends. He also tells you what he's going to do, even if it's taking a shower, yet he tells you to let you know that's why he won't write you back quickly.

He even sends you video of what he will eat, mostly to let you know that there is no one with him in the room if that is your concern, also at night, telling you that he will go to sleep.

Honestly, Aemond has never done this before on a trip and even though you didn't ask him to, as if wanting to see where he is and what exactly he is doing, wanting to check on him at all times, Aemond does it for your peace of mind.

And without wanting to, you already find yourself waiting for him to send you picture or video of what he will do next, feeling paranoid and to some extent a controller.

You know that this is wrong, that it is not necessary, that neither of you have ever acted this way before and that it is as if you want to know Aemond's movements every second in an unnecessary and… toxic way.

And it's not right, you know it's not.

But Aemond feels that need and so do you, even if you don't want it, you feel that need to know that Rivers is not taking advantage of your absence and worse…. That he is giving in to it by making the partnership possible.

But Aemond would never hurt you, he has told you that and you know that, but you also know as well as he does that he has the eyes of almost everyone on him and will have problems with his grandsire by the time he returns because of Rivers' disconformity.

So even in the event, Aemond feels more that need to let you know that she's not around Rivers, that he's not doing anything wrong or giving her and him anything to talk about.

And the worst part is that you are there, attentive, waiting and watching it all.

Even after the event is over, Aemond tells you that he's going back to his hotel room, telling you that he's going to take a shower. Then he sends you a picture of him brushing his teeth and then another one of him in bed and at an angle so that you can see that he is all alone.

And only at that moment, for two full weeks, just this very night you feel completely calm and at peace, knowing that he is coming back tomorrow and will be by your side again.

And you don't understand.

You just don't understand what happened to both of you.

You don't understand how you went from having the most beautiful and healthy relationship ever, to this, where both you and he acted in a toxic and completely unnecessary way.

And when you least expect it, tears begin to flow from your eyes as you stare at the dark ceiling of the room, alone in the huge bed, with frustration and sadness completely invading you and loneliness settling in your heart.

You are honestly afraid.

In the midst of your storm of emotions, you fear that the beautiful and healthy connection with your boyfriend will soon be gone. You're afraid that the relationship will become toxic.

You just don't want to lose the intimacy and complicity you both have to be replaced to this, the insecurities and these needs to look good and want to prove that neither of you, especially him, is failing in the relationship.

And with everything that's going on, the company, his grandsire, Rivers, you have no idea how to fix it.

Aemond's arms wrap around your body tightly, clinging completely to your figure, holding you tight against him as he hides his face in the curve of your neck, inhaling of your soft scent that drives him absolutely crazy.

And you reciprocate his embrace in kind by slipping your arms around his neck, hiding your face between his chest and neck, leaving a soft kiss on his cheek to cling to him again.

"I missed you," he murmurs lovingly and almost melancholy in your ear.

You hug him tighter, lovingly, as you place a small smile on your lips.

"Me too, babe."

He too leaves replete kisses on your cheek, tucking you back into his body, not wanting to let you go, while to you all his scent and the feeling of being in his arms is more than gratifying, being just what you needed.

He strokes your hair as he inhales deeply, not being able to get enough of it. And neither of you say anything else, as actions speak for themselves and what two need, is the touch of each other.

It was two weeks but for both you and him it felt like months.

You both look at each other and he leaves a soft kiss on your lips which you reciprocate as you both have a small smile on your lips. Then you both separate and start to head towards the car once Cole and the other men help Aemond to put his suitcases in the trunk.

All the way he keeps holding your hand, while you drive to the apartment and he talks to you about everything that happened on the trip.

"Our trip to the Iron Islands will now be easier," he tells you proudly and visibly excited.

You are glad to hear that the companies are doing well and that he has had friendly meetings with his partners, in fact you tell him so, as he smiles softly throughout and thanks you.

He also gives you the news that he will have a meeting with Rodrik Greyjoy very soon that involves talking about plans for an early partnership between Pike and Targaryen Inc.

You hum in agreement, smiling softly.

"I could tell," you look at him for a second to refocus on the road, "I'm sure your conversation with him will go well. But you want to go on a trip there too?"

"Sure," he tells you willingly, holding your hand against his lips, "They say it's a beautiful place. I've seen pictures too," he says then leaves a soft kiss on the back of your hand.

Once you both get home, you help him with his suitcases and unpacking, while now you tell him about your days at work, college and also here.

Fortunately for him and you, it's Friday, so you both stay home and rest. He tells you that he won't be going to work Saturday and Sunday, so you have the whole weekend for the two of you.

You still have to work Sunday afternoon but you don't mind, it still won't be long, so you enjoy and take advantage of these free moments with your boyfriend.

Later that same night you both resume your nights of intimacy, which is something Aemond had longed for since you both had that fight after the event, leaving after traveling not too soon after that was just awful for him.

First you both take a little nap where nothing feels better than sleeping in each other's arms again, both of you without being an inch apart from each other in the huge bed.

Then when you wake up you go together to the supermarket to do the week's shopping and at the end you stay in the living room watching movies.

And it was also something you craved.

Obviously you're not as insatiable as he is, as Aemond really can't get enough of you when it comes to sex and really takes all his time with you. This time is no exception.

But once that glorious weekend ends and a new week begins, you both resume your routines from before and in which he simply has no time for you.

Again Aemond tries to do everything in his power to come home early and spend more time with you, which is something you consider and are grateful for his effort, as you knew that sooner or later he would have to go back to his old busy routine.

Not being on good terms with his grandsire, having to attend meetings and phone calls from his partners, making and reviewing reports, delaying as much as he can the partnership with Rivers just so he doesn't have to see her, it's too much.

And little by little, although he doesn't want to, he returns to his exhaustive routine of before and in which unfortunately also affects you for seeing him only at night at a very late hour.

Although he still does everything he can to make sure that work doesn't take up more of his time than it should.

You continue as normal, going to work and attending your classes, but you find it again sad and annoying that you are again having less time with Aemond.

As well as what you didn't want to happen.

And of course Aemond would have to explain himself, having that need like on the trip so you wouldn't think other things, telling you all the time, either by message or in person, that nothing happened, they just talked about work and nothing else.

Sooner or later Alys Rivers would reach her breaking point, so if Aemond wasn't looking for her, then she would be looking for him.

So you had to go back to reading magazine articles online where they talk about how they've seen her in the Targaryen building and so on.

That's how things were going on for a few weeks, almost for a month, until again and unexpectedly, Aemond has to travel again.

Aemond is technically not yet the head of Targaryen Inc, his father is, but due to his health, he must attend for him.

Again to Casterly Rock to an important event and also to a conference where Aemond will meet with the board of directors and his partner Jason Lannister.

Other businessmen will also attend as it is a general event and heads of major companies all over the country are in attendance.

The news of having to travel again catches Aemond and you off guard, explaining that the board meetings normally take place in November, but that they are earlier this year.

So as soon as he gets the news, he starts preparing everything for his trip, even preparing work papers and other preparations for his presentation at the conference, while you again help him and make sure he misses nothing.

He can't miss his meeting with the board of directors, it is paramount and a really big commitment, so you understand but you are disappointed all the same.

Honestly you are disappointed that you have to be separated from your boyfriend again, as you were not expecting to have to stay home alone for a week again.

The event lasts two days and Aemond will have to travel there from before to ensure his presence and avoid any unforeseen events as it is an important event.

Until again when you least expect it, the day comes for Aemond to leave.

He paces back and forth, making sure nothing is missing, while you help him finish packing one of his two suitcases, while he talks on the phone to Criston and then to Eleonor to continue making sure he has the right information about what time he has to board his private jet.

You then head to the kitchen and make a quick breakfast for him and yourself, you also make him a cup of coffee and ask him to stop for a few moments to get some food in his stomach, to which he does while still busy on his phone.

"Which hotel?"

You hear him ask Eleonor as he takes a sip of his coffee.

"Ah, yes, that's fine. But… about the documents, did I bring the folder with me?"

You at all times stand still, eating your breakfast and listening to what he says to Eleonor back.

"Okay, I'll go check," he says and quickly heads back to his office, still holding his phone to his ear.

You continue to stand still, as you watch him disappear down the hallway and let out a breath, not really being able to do anything since you know him too well and he always gets paranoid when he has to travel, making sure to get everything ready one last time.

A few minutes pass and finally Aemond stands still in the kitchen to finish his breakfast, though when he's done he heads to the bedroom to check his suitcases one last time and start placing them in the hallway for when Cole arrives and he has to take them down to put them in the car.

He paces back and forth, wasting no time, watching his wristwatch every second, counting down the time for when Cole arrives and he has to leave.

You meanwhile take his briefcase and place it on the island with you, waiting for the moment when he has to leave.

When they start calling him.

You look at the screen and see that it's about his grandsire, causing an unpleasant feeling all over your body as you remember the way he treated you last time, but you quickly let Aemond know.

"Your grandsire is calling you!"

Aemond comes out into the hallway with one of his suitcases.

"Please pick up, love."

You nod and accept the call, put it out loud and resume your breakfast.

"Aemond?"

"Yeah? What's wrong?" he exclaims from where he stands.

"How's it going, son? Are you ready?"

"Yes," he replies with a little force in his voice, securing his suitcase one last time, "Cole should be here any minute."

"You got all the conference details?"

"Yes, Eleonor mailed me everything," he says as he walks over to the island and pulls the phone towards him to take a sip of what's left of his coffee cup.

"Very well. Then you'll meet Alys and her uncle at the airport, I've offered them to travel with you, after all the three of you are going to the same place."

You immediately stop chewing, as well as your whole body stops moving, standing completely still and with tension all over your shoulders.

Aemond also immediately watches you, instantly realizing your reaction, but you look away from him trying to appear indifferent and with the lump in your throat you go back to chewing, bringing your cup to your lips.

You feel your heart start to beat wildly, feeling instantly how your tranquility disappears and suddenly you feel overwhelmed by all the mixture of emotions that invade you.

Meanwhile Aemond frowns and with a bewildered and also annoyed look, quickly turns back to his grandfather.

"What?" he snaps at him.

Otto Hightower lets out a long breath on the other end of the line.

"Aemond—

"I didn't even know she was going to the event too and why are you telling me this now?" he inquires her completely serious, in an annoyed and deadly tone.

"Because I knew you would do anything to avoid it and I wasn't going to allow it. We're so close to signing the contracts and I knew this was going to please Alys, so she'll see you at the airport and I expect… that you'll give her a good treat and please her for the entire trip."

A shiver of jealousy, insecurity and sadness runs through you, as you bite the inside of your cheek and try to act nonchalant about it all, but you know you're not good at hiding your true emotions and Aemond sees that, not liking his grandfather's words at all.

"Have you lost your fucking mind?"

He inquires him just as serious and annoyed as before and Otto sighs.

"I'm not having this conversation with you again, Aemond. Grow up and do what you're told if you want your company to survive."

"Maturity doesn't mean I have to do everything you say!" he exclaims angrily and exasperatedly at him.

"For the love of the Seven, it's only a flight, stop acting like a fucking little child!"

Aemond sighs and runs a hand over his face, wearily.

"I can't believe you're doing this to me."

"Everything is already decided. You're going to have to deal with it, whether you like it or not, I honestly don't care. And I hope..." he begins to say in a threatening tone, "That by the time you get back, Rivers doesn't cause a scene for me again because of your lack of commitment and interest."

"That's your problem and hers, not mine. When I get back I want to have a serious conversation with you."

And finally Aemond hangs up annoyed with his visibly frustrated face, where in comparison to him, you hide your emotions, not wanting to frustrate him more with your behavior upon hearing this new travel plan, acting disinterested.

So you try to make yourself really look carefree by taking your dirty plate and cup to the dishwasher, starting to wash them, not observing Aemond at any moment, fearing that he will notice your true state.

While you at all times bite the inside of your cheek, resist the urge to cry and insecurity as well as a host of other frustrating emotions completely invade your body.

And Aemond immediately notices, because he knows you too well.

So feeling the weight of the situation, he stands up with an almost tired face and walks towards you, instantly slipping an arm around your waist to turn you towards him and leave a soft kiss on your forehead.

Something inside you snaps as you hear this.

"I know what you must be thinking, but you have nothing to worry about."

He says softly, hugging you tightly and lovingly, holding you close against his body.

"The only one I care about is you and I promise I will stay in touch with you for as long as I can."

And a realization comes over you, holding you completely still against him.

"No matter how busy I am, I will always find time to call or text you, just like last time," he promises you, wanting to comfort you, "I will do everything I can to keep you calm while I'm away."

You feel that realization hit you all at once again and with your gaze gone and your lips parted you just blink, because suddenly you don't have the strength anymore, for anything.

And because of your lack of response and movements, Aemond separates his head from your shoulder to watch you, still hugging you tightly and not wanting to let you go until he is sure you will be okay, watching you with concern.

"Hey, did you hear me? You will always be my priority, no matter where I am."

"Tell me you understand, please love," he pleads with slight anguish, completely attentive to you, holding your face with both hands gently in a desperate action.

He assures you firmly, wanting to make you understand and wanting you to say something back, anything. But you just watch him for a second, then stare at a spot in the kitchen and say nothing, your face without much expression.

With a lump in your throat, because you really can't speak, you feel like a fool even though it's part of all the emotions you're feeling at the moment, unable to help it.

"Good," he murmurs confidently, feeling a little calmer and leaves a soft kiss on your cheek, to pull away and continue to prepare everything for when he has to leave.

So the only thing you can do, is that nod in his direction, without uttering a word. And apparently, that's good enough for him.

Aemond continues to make sure he has everything ready in his suitcases and that nothing is missing, leaving them by the doorway.

While you watch him silently, still with all that overwhelming mix of emotions invading your mind. Again you feel your strength drain away and anxiety takes over, with an ache beginning to spread throughout your chest.

While he in comparison to you is calm, unconcerned, having no idea of everything that is going through your mind at that moment, making you feel bad to be thinking this now.

How cruel am I going to be?

You wonder with sadness, as you bite the inside of your cheek and try to hold back the tears that want to come out of your eyes. You don't want him to notice your agitation, at least not yet, but it's getting harder and harder to control it.

You love him.

You love him deeply.

You know that perfectly well. There is no doubt about it. And you know he loves you too.

But it all comes to your mind hitting you like a violent wave, drowning you, the magazines, his work, the association with Riverlands, the event, his grandfather, the press, his travels and Alys Rivers.

You watch as he ready waits for Cole with his phone in hand at the entrance, typing quickly, assuming he must be texting him, with the suitcases at his side and his face of concentration.

"Love, could you hand me a folder I left on my desk, please? It's black."

He asks you while at the kitchen island he hurriedly checks his briefcase, as you bite your lips and swallow hard.

"Sure," you say without much emotion and head for his office.

When you return you hand him the folder and he thanks you to arrange everything perfectly back into his briefcase.

"Cole won't be long, we're already late," he speaks to you also in a hurry, "If you need anything you know you can call me. But you can also call my mom if you need someone to come over, she's going to Oldtown for another two months," he lets you know, "Okay?" he watches you for a moment and you force a small smile, nodding in his direction, "Okay," he mumbles.

And he disappears back into the room, mumbling that he hasn't taken his jacket, while you watch him, standing still again with your hard face, wondering:

How cruel am I going to be?

Then Aemond stands still again at the entrance to the apartment, answering a call from Cole.

"Have you arrived yet?" he pauses slightly, "Fifteenth floor, C100. All right," he ends the call and looks a little more paranoid, turning to his suitcases, "Almost leaving, love."

You don't say anything back, you just watch him and feel that lump in your throat again, wanting to talk to him but the words get stuck, feeling more of your anxiety, agitation, sadness and anguish, with tears in the corners of your eyes, not being able to control it anymore.

How cruel am I going to be?

It repeats constantly in your mind until the tears fall down your cheeks and that pain in your chest gets stronger, watching it without being able to contain your emotions anymore.

"I can't do this anymore," you say in a shaky voice, getting his attention.

Aemond looks away from his phone and watches you, where your state slowly takes him by surprise and he watches you completely attentively, a little confused, not understanding, starting to worry.

"Love—

"I know it's not your fault," you make it clear to him, starting to cry loudly, shaking your head, "But I can't anymore."

Aemond surprised, quickly turns to you, trying to speak.

"Y/N—

"The first time you went to Casterly Rock with her, I wasn't at peace. I was scared and not for you, but for her," you confess to him, sad, "And you sending me pictures and videos of where you were and what you were doing, made me feel like we didn't trust each other."

"Y/N, I only did it so you would be calm and safe while I was away," he tells you in a soft, confused voice.

"You don't understand," you insist, "That made me feel like a controller, like you think I need to be constantly watching everything you do, and when had that ever happened on your previous trips?" you inquire, "It hadn't been like that since she—

You stop, not wanting to say more, as you sniffle and wipe your tears with your fingers, lowering your gaze, sorrowful, sad and disconsolate.

Instantly Aemond stops in front of you, trying again to hold your face in his hands, completely worried.

But before you can say anything, the doorbell rings at that moment and you both know who it is, Cole. But despite this, he continues to be attentive to you.

"My love, I understand," he says softly, wanting to comfort you, "I understand that you don't trust her, I understand your reasons, but—

"It's not just her, it's also what happened at that event, the press wanting you and her together, the magazines, your grandfather, and I-I…" you sniffle your nose, "I don't want our relationship to become a toxic one."

At that moment Aemond looks at you completely unsure, his heart beginning to pound, his gaze completely intent and anxious.

"What? Y/N, what are you saying?"

How cruel am I going to be?

"I can't anymore, Aemond," you tell him in your completely broken voice.

He watches you silently, his lips parted, fully inspecting your expression, beginning to feel his pulse quicken a little too much, understanding perfectly what you are implying.

When again you ring the doorbell, which catches your attention amidst your trail of tears but not him, he remains attentive to you, not caring, beginning to feel a huge void in his chest, incredulous, advancing towards you in a needy manner.

"Y/N, don't do this."

"I don't have a choice," you tell him in pain and he again tries to take you in his arms.

"But—

There's a knock on the door, interrupting him, as he feels a painful lump form in his throat and he looks at you in complete shock, disbelief and hurt.

"Listen, can we talk about this when I get back, please?" he asks pleadingly, holding you by the waist firmly, not wanting to let you go, "Just…" he shakes his head anguish, "Wait for me, okay? And when I get back, we'll talk about it."

You shake your head, pointing your gaze at the door for a second.

"You must leave now."

And Aemond becomes more concerned about this, seeing the determination and defeat in your whole look of sadness, giving this up now and not intending to wait for him, beginning to feel his eye begin to burn and despair along with anguish invade him more.

"Sir? Are you there?"

You hear Cole ask from the other side of the door, but Aemond pays him no attention, wanting to fix this, desperately.

"Yell at me," he implores you, "Get angry, reproach me, anything you want, anything but this, please, I beg you."

You close your eyes, swallowing hard.

"Sir? I'm sorry but we must leave now," Cole again speaks from the other side of the door, "Your flight departs in less than an hour."

And al Cole again knocks on the door in desperation, clearly because he has to do his job and you're taking advantage of it.

You open your eyes and both of you stare at each other without saying anything, where you just wait until he has to leave, your face completely devastated.

But he barely processes what's happening, his eye reddening and his heart rate racing, waiting for you to understand and say something back to him.

"Go now," you mutter sadly to him.

"No, I'm not leaving until I fix this," he tells you desperately, on the verge of losing patience, "Just…please don't do this, not now. I-I don't… I don't want to lose you."

"Your grandfather will be upset with you."

"I don't fucking care about my grandfather, Y/N! Right now I don't care about anything, just this, us!"

Cole again knocks on the door, insistent.

"Just fucking wait!"

He yells at Cole desperate, upset, distressed, his emotions running high, not being able to control himself anymore and you decide that enough is enough, because Aemond won't leave, then it's best that you leave.

"I'll be leaving too."

You know that this trip is very important to him and you still love him too much not to worry about his work.

And the last thing you want is for you to be the reason for not being on time, which could lead to him not doing well at his event and conference with the board and his partner.

You murmur to him with a broken heart and turn around, walking towards the room, instantly being followed by him.

"No, Y/N, please, just wait," he tells you more pleadingly than before, "I promise you this whole thing with Rivers will be over soon, I promise!" he insists, "Or not, I just won't make any association with her, I can find another way for the company, I don't care what my grandfather says or—

"You can't do that and you know it. The company depends on hers."

"But you can't do this! Not now, please!" he exclaims in frustration, starting to cry.

And just as you're about to go into the closet to grab your clothes, he stops you, turning you to him to hold you and make you look at him, make you see how devastated he is, definitely not expecting any of this at all, feeling completely helpless and powerless in the face of the situation.

"Please Y/N, please," he says to you with a broken voice, as he puts his forehead together with yours for a moment, starting to tremble and feel an unpleasant sensation all over his stomach.

And seeing him like this completely destroys you.

You've never seen him like this before, you know you're breaking his heart and more by breaking up with him now, like this, like you're taking advantage of the fact that he has to leave to get on a plane.

How cruel am I being?

And even though you didn't want to do it, at least not now as he is asking you to, you know this is necessary.

Because you know that if he gets on his jet with her and you and he are still together, you will not be calm at all, you will over think things, things that are not.

If the partnership with Rivers passes and you and Aemond are still together, you will feel the same insecurity as always because the two of them will be partners and will have to keep seeing each other for the report of both companies coming together.

You will feel controlling, he will have this need to want to be good to you in an unnecessary way and you will just feel bad about yourself. And it won't end there.

And you'll have to keep putting up with the press, the boundaries Rivers oversteps, what Otto asks Aemond to do with her and the necessary justifications from him to you.

"I'm so sorry," you tell him with tears streaming down your cheeks and your face completely broken.

And Aemond shakes his head in frustration, in hopelessness, closing his eyes tightly, not believing it, not accepting it.

"Wait until I come back so we can talk about it and work it out. Don't end things like this, please," he tells you in a broken voice, starting to cry, "I-I love you."

"I love you too," you tell him the same way he does.

"And if you love me then why are you leaving me?" he asks you in a painful voice, not understanding.

Your whole face transforms into anguish.

"Aemond—

"Please don't leave me," he begs you once more.

Silence envelops you, where you both cry, you completely broken and he in complete despair, in the room where you both have shared so many special moments throughout your relationship, in the apartment where you began to form a little life together.

The air is charged with so much tension and nostalgia, where you both suffer from an intense mix of emotions, where you both suffer equally, as everything feels unreal, so suddenly and without time to react.

And Aemond tries to find any hope of being able to hold on, to get you back. But in the depths of his broken heart, he feels and knows that he has lost the battle.

And you also feel and know that this has been necessary, as broken as it has made you feel and in which you know, you are probably not going to fully recover by doing this.

The last thing you see of Aemond is how with his completely devastated look he watches silently as you pack some of your clothes in a bag to leave, still not accepting it, completely broken inside and imploring you with his gaze not to do this.

But you knew that if you didn't leave, he wouldn't leave and it's important that he catch his flight to Casterly Rock.

So without even saying hello or giving Cole a glance, you leave the apartment quickly with tears streaming down your cheeks, walking away from there and him.

You arrive at Floris' house in search of temporary lodging where she opens the door and you burst into tears in her arms, without even being able to talk to her about what happened when you cried uncontrollably.

And after a few hours, the next thing you know from Eleonor, simply because you needed to know for the last time, is that Aemond managed to get on his jet at the estimated time to land promptly at Casterly Rock.

She tells you that it was difficult but that they managed to convince him. And that's the last you hear from him.

Despite your determination to move on, every day at all times you can't help but feel a deep sadness and a sense of loss that won't leave you alone.

Letting go of your relationship with Aemond is difficult, you just can't. And rightly so if it's only been weeks, because leaving him behind, feels like giving up a very important part of your life.

You tried to find comfort in your daily routine, classes and work, but everything reminded you of him, all the time you were thinking about him and when you least expected it, you were already crying again, without being able to help it.

At night it is more difficult, you feel completely alone, you cry until you fall asleep, you questioned what you had done and in the middle of everything, you miss him deeply.

Days after Floris accepts you in his house, you immediately request a room in your university's residence halls and fortunately there is one available near your Marketing department.

You asked Floris to please accompany you to the apartment to get the rest of your things, which she did not hesitate to do in order to support you and also help you, taking advantage of the fact that Aemond was still away.

You did everything as fast as possible, not wanting to remember and think too much, you just wanted to get out of there with your things, avoiding to feel and let all the memories consume you, because you couldn't stand it.

A few tears escaped you, but as soon as it happened, the two of you left the apartment, locking it and slipping the key under the door, so as not to return it to him in person.

After a while, exactly after the week in which Aemond would already be back in King's Landing, he started looking for you through messages and calls, begging you to please see each other and talk.

Feeling even more broken, you decided to block him from everywhere, which caused him to come looking for you at work, hoping to talk to you.

But as soon as you recognized his car parking on the street, you quickly hid in the small back rooms, begging Sophie to cover for you.

You later found out that Aemond had been texting your mutual friends, asking how he could find you, where you lived now, wanting to sort things out, unwilling to let the two of you end up like you did.

Hel messaged you, so did Daeron, even Baela, but you decided it was best not to respond, because if you did, you would agree to talk to Aemond. And it broke your heart not to reply to any of them, especially Hel, but you know yourself too well and you did it for your own good.

But you never let him find you, because you knew you'd go back to him the minute you both sat down to talk and that's not what you want.

Not with his grandfather and Rivers still behind him.

Until one day Aemond stopped.

He stopped trying to find you and stopped asking your friends where you might be, you also stopped reading about him in magazines and social media. You read about his family, but nothing about him.

And so it went for a while, for about two months, where you to this day do not heal and you keep thinking about him, finding it strange this new life without him.

When one morning, a magazine article and almost all the social media announce a news that makes you understand now a little more the disappearance of Aemond not only from your life, but also from the world, surprising you.

You read the news in complete disbelief, thinking of Alicent, Hel, Daeron, Rhaenyra, everyone, but most of all him.

You know what this means, the note itself says so, but even though you knew it was only a matter of time, as Aemond told you, you are still surprised to see this, surprised that it has already happened.

Suddenly you feel a need and urge to text or call him, but you know it's not a good idea, yet the urge is there, thinking about how he must be feeling and all that he and his family must be going through.

Fortunately you don't do anything, but this leaves you thinking.

After almost everyone reads this news, the whole Targaryen family is kept in hiding, there is no sighting of them, no statements and absolutely nothing, which is what the press wants.

That's what happens for a month, until finally sightings of Otto and Alicent Hightower are reported. Also of Aegon with Rhaenyra and Daemon.

Until you simply decide not to be aware of it anymore, having to continue your life without him, since these are matters that don't concern you, at least not anymore.

So a few weeks later, Floris' birthday arrives, who invites his closest friends to a pub to celebrate in a small group, wanting to have a good time, relax and nothing more, to which you agree to go.

What you definitely didn't expect, was to meet your ex, Aemond Targaryen after all that happened and after almost five months.

general taglist:

@melsunshine @n4forlife @iamavailablesstuff @ttkttt @elliaze @trshngyn @tsujifreya @imsoshygirl @watercolorskyy @kckt88 @zenka69 @yentroucnagol @crispmarshmallow @bellastwd @queenofshinigamis @strangersunghoon @happinessinthebeing @iloveallmyboys

taglist part 3:

@hoziersfairy @bananaminion678 @targaryenmoony @skzenhalove

#aemond targaryen fanfic #aemond targaryen x reader #aemond targaryen x y/n #aemond targaryen #aemond targaryen x you #aemond fanfiction #aemond x fem!reader #aemond x oc #aemond x reader #hotd aemond #aemond targaryen angst

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linopls · 1 year ago

Text

kinktober day twenty-seven

sexting felix x fem!reader

warnings: SMUT MINORS DNI, mentions of unprotected sex

1.1k words

routine company meetings were a wide known snooze-fest. it felt like a competition for who could talk the longest and about the most boring aspects of the company. you never understood why you had to be here. you were just a marketing student intern who was helping run stray kids’ social media accounts, it's not like the finances made any sense to you.

unlike your contract had stated, you started to form a liking to one of the members: felix. the two of you quickly became acquainted when you both had to explain a tiktok trend to your supervisor that felix wanted to post. your supervisor never ended up understanding it but felix thanked you for your attempted support by buying you lunch that afternoon.

eventually it became lunch every time felix was in the building. the two of you would rant to each other about working for different sides of the company and all the struggles you faced. it was just two friends hanging out until the day he called you pretty.

it came out so casually. you weren’t dressed any different but he said your hair looked pretty. it took you back for a second before you smiled and said thank you. that day he payed like usual, he insisted every time, but then suggested you guys got lunch somewhere other than the cafeteria, or maybe dinner.

it never became official, and it never could, until the company removed its employee dating restrictions. you two went on dates like boyfriend and girlfriend, texted like boyfriend and girlfriend, and had amazing sex like boyfriend and girlfriend. he was incredible in bed, he claimed he didn’t have that much experience, but he was brilliant.

he even drove you crazy even when his dick wasn’t inside of you. when you were at dinner, all it took was one glance in your direction and if there weren’t so many people in the restaurant, you would let him take you right there. he had such a way with words as well, and he used that to his advantage.

you see your phone screen light up on the table in front of you. the way the conference room was set up was four rows of tables set in a U-shape. you and your team always sat in the last row to the far left and the stray kids members say in the last row on the far right. this meant when you did not want to pay attention to the current speaker you could look at felix across the room.

you look at the contact photo and name and see that felix sent you a message. you slowly grab your phone and open the message.

felix: you look good in red ❤️

you’re wearing a red pantsuit today, his favorite color. you smile and look up to him, he’s already looking at you and smiling. he looks back down to his phone and types for a second before looking back up to you. your phone lights up again.

felix: you looked really good in that red dress last night

you blush and try to discreetly cover your face with one of your hands. felix had taken you out to dinner the night prior and you wore a new dress, a similar shade of red to the pantsuit you wore today. when he first picked you up he stared at you, mouth agape. before telling you red was his favorite color.

felix: you also looked really good in the red matching set you wore in bed

his reaction when you slid your dress down your legs to reveal your matching red bra and panty set was a sight you’ll never get out of your head. his eyes glossed over with lust and a very obvious tent formed in his pants.

you: never knew you had such a sexual attraction for the color red… 😏

you look up to see felix subtly roll his eyes before beginning to type a response. you watch changbin look over his shoulder and giggle and felix pulls his phone to his chest. you thank god for your privacy screen protector and the fact you’re sat on the end and the person next to you is also so uninterested in the meeting that they are online shopping.

felix: just for you, in red specifically

felix: i think it's your color~

you: thank you baby🤭

you: i think i’ll wear another red set tonight ;)

you glance up from your phone to his felix’s reaction. his mouth forms a thin line before he bites down on his lips slightly.

felix: yeah?

felix: do you have a picture?

you: horny bastard. 🖕

felix: just want a spoiler 🥺

you: you’ll have to wait and see~~

felix rolls his eyes and sets his phone face down on the table and focuses back on the speaker. you begin to aimlessly scroll through your socials. before long another text from felix pops up and you eagerly click on it.

felix: i want to bend you over one of these tables and fuck you so badly

you: i’m doing great thanks for asking 😐

felix: i don’t even care who watches

felix: i just want you to cum on my cock over and over again

you: lix…

felix: you look so good from behind

felix: and i love that i can see your face in the mirror in my room

felix: the way tears stream down your face when i make you cum for a third or fourth time 😖

you: you’re so good at what you do

you: i’m already soaked just thinking about it 🫣

you adjust yourself awkwardly in your chair. feeling your panties sticking to your folds as felix stares you down from across the room.

felix: i just want to stuff you full of my cum

felix: over and over again

felix: go to the bathroom 😏

you notice he has his legs crossed and his bottom lip is caught between his teeth.

felix: wanna fill you with my cum and watch you sit through this meeting knowing who you belong to

you: it's too obvious if we leave within a couple minutes of each other :(

you: we’ll get a break soon and i’ll meet you in the bathroom on the floor above 😚

felix: my dick is throbbing thinking about being buried in your sweet pussy

you: we won’t need to waste any time, i’m already dripping for you

“alright everyone,” the speaker claps his hands together. “let’s take a lunch break and come back in an hour?”

as everyone begins to gather their things and leave the room, you quickly throw everything in your bag and streamline to the door. felix is holding the door waiting for you.

“come on, ms. l/n,” felix smiles. “lunch shall we?”

felix probably has mad sexting game

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@alemi-i @cupidsmoons @yoongles2025 @vixensss @chlooooop @lemontried @idkluvutellme @superiorbrownskinn @ana-stasssiaaa @amayaaseees @ilikecatsanddoritos @alnex05 @esairevmp @greysweaters-blog @sanzusfavgf @jutannies @faraonatojishady @hanniemylovelyquokka @chloeskzboomboom @quinnluvsmoney @burningupp-replies @aisha-md @jo-dinner @jeannie-beannie @httpsimmy @hazneezs @cuffier

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thatsdemko · 1 year ago

Text

fuck it, it’s fine - p.gavi

masterlist

pairings: Pablo gavi x gem!footballer!reader

warnings: mentions of hooking up + some content not intended for minors

a/n: everyone thank miss Olivia Rodrigo for getting me out of a writers block!!!!

Now I'm gettin' in the car, wreckin' all my plans

I know I should stop-, but I can't

THE NEXT DAY | NOW

the tablet is slammed down against the wooden table and shoved towards the edge of the desk where you’re seated. it’s not a pretty sight to look at, your public relations manager, your coach, your teams manager, and an article about your public hook up with a man you’d sworn was nothing but a friend despite previous sexual relations with that ended poorly for you and your team.

“I’ll give you a chance to explain why your tongue was in his mouth.” your teams manager paces the tiny conference room, everyone watches your every move waiting for a response, but nothing comes. your mouth is agape, like it’s ready to move and speak words, but nothing comes. the headline, the images, and the tiny caption below your faces stole every breath you had.

PABLO GAVI SEEN WITH Y/N Y/L/N DESPITE DENYING RUMORS OF PREVIOUS RELATIONS.

the Real Madrid footballer, y/n y/l/n, seen shoving tongue down Pablo gavi’s throat. it was reported the two had many hookups throughout the previous season through anonymous sources.

“how did this happen again?”

“well…”

THAT AFTERNOON

winning your first match of the season is the best feeling. it gives you the clarity in mind that the season could have a great ending or a decent outcome, and with high spirits, you enter the locker room on cloud nine. oh little did you know what was waiting for you.

your team pats each other on the back, hugs for the members who ran the pitch, and showers of water from the plastic bottles to celebrate the first game back. it’s all the things that should bring you into a good mood, except the little device in your hands has other news.

gavi: nice win.

gavi: do you want to come over?

now how could you say no? sure, it’s been a couple of months since your stomach did backflips and your heart nearly shot out of its chest, but could you ever turn down Pablo gavi? absolutely not. even if it was bad for you, and you’d end up spiraling out of control like the last time, you still say what you always do.

you: time and place. I’ll be there.

—

his cheeky little grin makes you want to slap it right off. the minute he opens that door, the second that grin fell onto his lips, you don’t feel a single amount of regret when your lips touch his.

“Aw you missed me?” he chuckles, the vibration of him pulls you closer as you kick the door shut behind you. your lips just grazing each others before he bites your bottom lip with his teeth allowing his tongue to slip inside.

“pretty big ego you got to think I would miss you.” you say. pressing your index finger into his chest, you position your body closer to his, but still with enough space between you both. you can practically feels his cock hardening against you despite the distance between you both. it makes you smile knowing how you quick he was wrapped around your finger.

“I don’t know, rumor has it I’m all you think about.” his smirk makes your brain fuzzy, your pussy throbs like it hasn’t before as you press yourself into him feeling his hardness in his pants. you plant your lips against his, and grab a fistful of his hair allowing his mouth to open for your tongue to slip in , “I guess the rumors are true.”

“aren’t you the guy who says don’t believe everything you read online?” you cross your arms over your chest, subconsciously, pushing them upward and closer together making his eyes fall anywhere but on your face. you like the way he looks at you, and despite where he’s looking, Pablo knew how to give you the attention where you wanted it. maybe that’s why you always crawled back.

a scoff escapes his lips while he shakes his head to snap him out from staring at your chest, “god you drive me wild.”

“good to know I do something to you.” you say it with a sly smile when he unexpectedly turns toward you and presses a kiss to your lips. it wasn’t unlike him to show this sort of affection, but Pablo gavi was more into sex than feelings.

“let’s go out, I want to show you off.”

“showing me off in Barcelona? you must forget who I play for.”

THE NEXT DAY | NOW

his fingers tap against the wood table tops listening to you from start to finish, and when you finally look up, none of their hard facial expressions had fallen. this truly was a bad idea. getting in his car, sucking off his face for millions of people to see, the feeling in your gut is anything but pleasant.

“do you ever make smart decisions?”

your public relations manager laughs, the stress lines on his forehead can tell you every story of stupid decisions you’d made since the move to Madrid. and all of them seemed to start and end with Pablo gavi.

“I’d ban you from seeing him, but what’s the point? I know you’ll go and do it anyway.”

“no sir I’m done with him and anyone in a Barcelona shirt.” you put your hands up in defeat wishing you had a white flag to show you were surrendering to the root cause of frustration from your team.

“get out of my office now, I hope I don’t have to see you here again this season.”

you push yourself out of the chair and bid a goodbye to your three least favorite people out of the entire team and exit the building with not an ounce of pride left in you.

gavi: my place again? I guess I did miss you.

here we go again.

Yes, I know that he's my ex, but can't two people reconnect?

"I only see him as a friend, " the biggest lie I ever said

404 notes · View notes

whyse7vn · 1 year ago

Text

RUMOURS -

[ot7 x reader]

3D OUT NOW!

8 participants - 8 online

———————————

tae: guys be honest am i puppy coded

jin: you are rat coded

tae: no i’m not guys tell him i’m not

jk: cheese

hobi: GUYS DID YOU SEE THE STATEMENT BIGHIT JUST PUT OUT FOR THE Y/N AND YOONGI DATING RUMOURS???????

jimin: the what?

jk: THE WHAT?

tae: arf?

jin: you can’t force the puppy lifestyle

tae: you don’t know anything

guys tell him he knows nothing

jimin: were they not just fighting like???

namjoon: they made a statement about it?

tae: but bighit denied it right?

jk: RIGHT?

hobi: THATS THE CRAZY PART

jimin: no fucking way

jk: STOP LYING

namjoon: but they were literally just in a meeting about it?

like i’m not joking like 10 minutes ago they were in the conference room

they had to deny it no?

jk: RIGHT TELL HIM NAMJOON

namjoon: unless theyre actually together

jk: nO NO

NOT TRUE

TRUST ME

hobi: Hello.

This is BIGHIT MUSIC.

We would like to inform our fans that we as a company do not control relationships our artists may engage in.

This is in relation to the recent rumours concerning BTS SUGA and Y/n.

As this is a matter that concerns our artists personal lives we can not confirm or deny these rumours.

We ask that fans to respect both artists privacy and remind you that our company will spare no effort in providing legal support for our artists if it is needed.

We ask you for your continued love and support for both SUGA and Y/n and and a reminder that fellow BTS member Jungkook releases his solo single “3D” featuring Jack Harlow on September 29th.

IS THIS NOT INSANE

jin: the jungkook plug at the end???

jk: SO ITS NOT TRUE

THEY ARE NOT TOGETHER

namjoon: oh

tae: they could be

jimin: @ y/n @ yoongi wya

are you together? be honest

y/n: hiiiiiiiiiiii

jk: hiiiiiiiiiiiiii

yoongi: hello

jk: kill yourself

tae: babe tell me why you didn’t tell them to deny it

look me in the eyes

tell me the truth baby it’s just you and me

namjoon: we are in a gc

tae: you and me angle

jin: do you mean angel you fucking idiot

tae: baby 🥺

who is this man??

namjoon: i am curious tho

why didn’t you deny?

y/n: no point

tae: the point is we are in love

hobi: ok but are you together?

yoongi: who knows

jimin: obviously you fucking stupid bitch

jin: he wanna be mysterious so bad 😭

jk: this is not true

i won’t accept this

I WONT

namjoon: soooo

yoongi: it’s lowkey true anyways

namjoon: it is?

tae: IT IS???????

jk: NOT

IT IS NOT TRUE

THATS WHAT HES SAYING

yoongi: that is not what i’m saying

jimin: ur officially together?

y/n: we are not

yoongi: yet

y/n: yoongi!!!

yoongi: :3

jin: ew ok i want to throw up

hobi: i can’t stand you guys already

tae: i’m in a wheelchair actually

thanks a lot guys

namjoon: ok

jk: NOT OK

jimin: so scoups wasn’t the one for you then?

or mingyu?

jungkook???

or that san guy

not even minho????

i liked minho

shownu?

OH what about the young one

what was his name again

OH MARK

what happened to mark?

hobi: OMG WHAT ABOUT BAEKHYUN????

tae: YOU FUCKED WITH BAEKHYUN AND NOT ME??

WHEN

TELL ME WHEN

PLEASE DONT TELL ME IT WAS IN THE 2014-2016 TIMELINE

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

IT WAS WASN’T IT

OH MY GOD IM GONNA THROW UP

THROWING UP AS I TYPE

BELHHHHHHHH 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤮🤢🤮🤮🤮🤮🤢🤢🤢🤢🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤮🤢🤮🤮

namjoon: shut the fuck up

y/n: leave me alone

half of that list is a lie anyways

i am not a whore!

jimin: lowkey a lie but ok!

namjoon: jimin

jimin: what???

i still support my queen like yess you go girl catch flights not feelings or whatever the girls are saying these days

jin: y/n how do you not have like stds ?

yoongi: wtf is wrong with you

y/n: CUz IM NOT A WHORE

i don’t just fuck anybody

jimin: lied again cuz wtf is jungkook?

hobi: dead by now

probably

y/n: kook is special don’t be mean

jk: hehe i am >.<

hobi: what did i fuck did i tell you about heheing in this gc

jk: srry

jin: jungkook needs to be like deeply studied like he’s actually not fucking right and it’s scary

i’m scared

like how are you ignoring the fact that the girl you in love with is in your face basically claiming another man

and not just any man literally one of your closet friends

like the fact you can forget all of that after one compliment from her is insane

you are insane

jk: no i’m special tell him y/n

y/n: my special boy <3

jk: HEHEHEHEHHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHDHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEH

yoongi: we are not close friends btw

y/n: don’t start

yoongi: :3

tae: ok idc can you deny the rumours now

jk: PLEASE

yoongi: no

namjoon: as much as i for what ever you guys have got going on i really think you should deny the rumours

yoongi: no

jk: YEAH

WOOO PUT UR FOOT DOWN JOON

TELL HIM

WOOO WOOO

I LOVE KIM NAMJOON

tae: ???

why are you for what they have going on please pick a fucking side namjoon you cannot be the middle man

namjoon: can you guys shut up for 2

seconds

tae: 1

jungkook say 2

jk: 2

tae: we did

namjoon: you really didn’t

hobi: JUNGKOOK YOU HEHEED AGAIN YOU BETTER STOP ONE MORE TIME AND ILL GET PHYSICAL

jk: i’m sorry 😢

namjoon: anyways as i was saying i think it would be better to deny the the rumours now for y/ns sake she gets enough hate as it is and this will really only add to it

jimin: wait ur kinda right my poor girl :/

tae: i can give her love dw

come into my arms baby

cum 2 me

yoongi: kill yourself

jk: ILL PROTECT YOU Y/N

y/n: means the world jk

jk: AHHHHHHH :DDDDDDDD

yoongi: he’s lame

y/n: don’t

yoongi: :3

y/n: and thank you for ur concern joonie but i’m literally in a dating scandal every other week there’s honestly no point the hate was bound to come anyways

and plus the love out weighs the hate so i’m sosososo good

namjoon: i don’t believe you but ok

hobi: LMAOOOO

sorry not funny

tae: weak ass fucking leader ohmy god

where is ur sense of authority

where is ur dominance?

hobi: stop talking

y/n: we do not want to hear ur furry talk

tae: THAT IS NO WAY TO TALK TO YOUR ALPHA YOUNG LADY

now come here let me scent you

hobi: actually end your life

y/n: please

yoongi: come over

jin: geez buy me dinner first

jimin: fat bitch

jin: im literally gonna put this on twitter and get you cancelled

jimin: noooo not to ur 13 followers my career is done for i’m telling you

hobi: what’s ur eta what’s ur eta

jk: idk et sorry

and also idk who a is either

i’m sorry

hobi: LEAVE ME ALONE

jk: i said i was sorry

i hope u find them

hobi: i have a gun to ur head in my mind rn

jk: don’t shoot 😂

wrong emoji

*🥲

PLEASE I HAVE A FAMILY

jimin: of lice

jin: omg rice sounds so good rn

jimin: i said lice wow ur actually fat

jin: NAMJOON TELL HIM HES BEING PROBLEMATIC

namjoon: jimin ur being problematic

jimin: namjoon tell him he’s being big

namjoon: go away please

tae: ok why have the rumours not been denied

y/n: why are we back to this

yoongi: she wants me that’s why

jk: NO

NO TRUE

ARE YOU HER SPECIAL BOY

YOU ARE NOT

BECAUSE I AM

AND I HAVE PROOF

SO SHUT THE HELL UP

yoongi: thats cool and all but where are your dating rumours?

jk: SHUT THE HELL UP SHUT THE HELL UPPPPPPPP

y/n: stop being losers

jk: i’m in love with you

yoongi: :3

jin: insanity

tae: yoongi say something for me rq

yoongi: no

tae:

hobi: HELPPPPOO

jimin: LMAO

y/n: PLS

yoongi: ur actually a child and i do not use light mode so this just looks stupid

jin: was still funny with dark mode

yoongi: no it wasn’t

tae: it was

everyone laughed

don’t be mad i made everyone laugh

cuz u know u could NEVER

yoongi: namjoon didn’t laugh

tae: namjoon isn’t even a man

namjoon: ???

jk: i use light mode

jimin: what

jin: omg

hobi: ew

yoongi: as expected

tae: bro

y/n: kookie…

jk: IS THAT BAD OHMYGOD IS IT BAD HOW DO I CHANGE IT?? IS THAT BAD

AM I A BAD PERSON

I AM

I KNOW I AM

I SHOULD BE LOCKED UP

THEY NEED TO LOCK ME UP

PLEASE LOCK ME UP

NO JUST KILL ME

JUST KILL ME AND LET ME ROT

NO TORTURE ME

MAKE SURE IT HURTS REAL BAD

AND THEN LIKE

COOK BAM INFRONT OF ME AND MAKE ME EAT HIM AS I BEG YOU ALL TO STOP AND I START THROWING UP

THEN CHOKE ME UNTIL I CANT BREATE AND WATCH AS THE LIFE SLOWLY LEAVES MY EYES

namjoon: what the fuck

y/n: what did bam do

tae: that’s pretty messed up

jin: are you ok?

jimin: …

yoongi: fucking freak

hobi: woah

jk: punish me

namjoon: clam down

jk: please

y/n: crazy!

jk: kiss me

i know i don’t deserve it but kiss me

yoongi: go away

tae: kiss me

jk: NO

tae: ngl i’m sick of hoseok guys

hobi: what did i do

tae: leave me alone

hobi: i’m literally having sex with ur mother rn

tae: OMG????

PLS NO

namjoon: both of you just shut up please

hobi: you saw how he came for me for no reason and ur telling me to shut up??

are u fr rn…

i feel so betrayed rn

jimin: horny rn

y/n: gross

jimin: come fix it

yoongi: shut the fuck up

jk: DON’T SPEAK TO HER LIKE THAT

namjoon: i have a headache

jin: shut the hell up

namjoon left “3D OUT NOW!!”

y/n: wow jin

jk: namjoon :(

jimin: jin wtf did you do

hobi: what the hell seokjin

tae: ofc it was jin

yoongi: big jin L

jin: IT WASN’T MY FALUT

HE WAS WHINING LIKE A BITCH

jk: you should apologise

tae: bully

y/n: poor joonie

jimin: say sorry

hobi: always so mean for no reason

yoongi: 👎🏻

jin: u guys are actually not right in the head leave me alone

—

PT 2 TWITTER WORK HERE

tags: @piw6n @jvmisvu @birdie-vhs @kooksmilitarywife @hob3loveofmylife @jujubiism @bloopkook @ratchetpizza1 @myntalks @arloo00 @watamotee33 @y2kcy3brz @taiwan0618 @indigobsessed @freyadanvers @gguksbeloved @raetf

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inevitably-johnlocked · 9 months ago

Note

Hi, I don't know if you take requests for updates of already existing lists, but I wondered if you'd have any new recommendations of fics dealing with John's internalised homophobia? I particularly enjoy agirlsname's work. Thanks !

Hey Nonny!

I'm ALWAYS taking requests for lists!! Thank you for this one, it's been sitting for awhile awaiting a prompt!!

Cheers!

INTERNALIZED HOMOPHOBIA Pt. 2

See also:

John’s Internalized Homophobia

Homophobia / Sexuality / Pride (Updated Aug 2023)

A Better Fate Than Wisdom by flawedamythyst (G, 1,339 w., 1 Ch. || First Kiss, John’s Sexuality Crisis, Pining Sherlock, Happy Ending, Fluff) – Nearly four hours pass between their first kiss and their second.

London Gods by a_different_equation (E, 11,092 w., 5 Ch. || American Gods Fusion || Magical Realism, Sex Magic, True Love, PTSD John, First Kiss/Time, Marathon Sex, Sensuality, Genie Sherlock, Human John, Internalized Homophobia, Star-Crossed Lovers, Soul Mates) – Sherlock Holmes is a jinn who does not grant wishes. However, when Dr. John H. Watson, recently returned from the war in Afghanistan, gets into his cab by "accident", it might not even need magic to grant both men their deepest wish: love.

A Gossamer Dream by CarmillaCarmine (E, 15,985 w., 4 Ch. || Writer/Teacher AU || First Meetings, Friends to Lovers, Writer John / Teacher Sherlock, Fluff, London, Holding Hands, Online Friendship / Romance, Phone Sex, Anal Sex, Happy Ending, Alternating POV, Scottish John, Online Relationship, Internalized Homophobia, Hand Holding, Forehead Touching, First Kiss/Time, Texting/Sexting, Rimming, Toplock, Sherlock Speaks French) – Sherlock had never realised one could care so much about someone they'd never met in person. Now he is about to meet the friend with whom he's been chatting online for months and his anticipation is reaching a crescendo.

Rupert Street by WritingOutLoud (M, 27,262 w., 9 Ch. || Alternate First Meeting || Case Fic, Sexuality, Demisexual Sherlock, Drugging, Smart John, Sherlock Has Internalized Biphobia, Fluff, Angst with Happy Ending, Gay Bar, Flirting, John Manipulates Sherlock to Eat, John Deduces, Arguments, Kidnapping/Torture, Hospitalization, John Whump) – Discharged from the war with nothing but the clothes on his back and a realisation of his bisexuality, John Watson has to learn who he’s become. He can’t afford London on an army pension, but the city is the only friend he has. In an effort to understand his newfound queer identity, he heads to a bar one night, where he stumbles across a mysterious stranger who turns his life upside down. ‘I dug around inside myself, and I'm not quite sure what I found, but it was beautiful and terrifying all at the same time.’

Domestic Matters by ohlooktheresabee (M, 29,404 w., 6 Ch. || Fantasy AU || First Meetings, Developing Relationship, Fluff and Angst, Domestic Fluff, BAMF Sherlock, BAMF John, Idiots in Love, Misunderstandings, Supernatural Elements, Implied / Referenced Child Abuse, Elf Sherlock, Human/Elf Politics, Emotional Abuse, Possessive Sherlock, Anxious Sherlock, Buddy Greg) – All flatmates need to work out domestic matters between them - who does the dishes, who takes out the rubbish, how often does the carpet need to be vacuumed - these are part and parcel of sharing a living space together. However, when you’re an elf and your flatmate is going to be a human you just met, this rather complicates things…Very loosely inspired by 'The Elves and The Shoemaker' by The Brothers Grimm.

The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse by SilentAuror (E, 50,635 w., 1 Ch. || Post-S4/S4 Divergence, Case Fic, For a Case / Reverse Fake-Relationship, Conferences, Marriage Equality, Travelling / New York, Pride, Homophobia, Bottomlock, Marriage Proposal, John POV, Sexuality, Love Confessions, Emotional Love Making, Public Hand Jobs, Blow Jobs, Passionate Kissing, Needy/Clingy Sherlock, Virgin Sherlock, Touching / Hand Holding, Bed Sharing, Little Spoon Sherlock, Intense Orgasms) – John and Sherlock go to New York to attend a conference run by the National Defence of Traditional Marriage Coalition in order to investigate the potential bombing of the annual Manhattan Pride parade. As the conference unfolds, John finds himself repulsed by the toxic ideology being presented, which becomes relevent to his own unacknowledged issues and his friendship with Sherlock...

A Goose Quill Dipped in Venom by Polyphony (M, 52,748 w., 16 Ch. || Celebrity John AU || Alternate First Meeting, TV Host John, Supermodel Mary, Character Death, Mystery, Romance, Case Fic, First Kiss/Time, Meddling Mycroft, Drug Abuse, Doctor John, PDA, Deductions, POV Sherlock, Toplock, Sexual Tension, Angry/Rough Sex, Hopeful Ending, Asperger’s Sherlock) – Sherlock Holmes, consulting detective, is called in to a very ordinary although brutal murder. Something is badly out of tune with the whole scenario and Sherlock finds himself becoming more and more obsessed with the crime - and also with the victim.

Points by lifeonmars (E, 53,791 w., 42 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || HLV Rewrite / Canon Divergence, Married Life, Pregnancy / Baby Watson, Drinking to Cope, Boxing / Fisticuffs, Clueless John, Angst, Minor Medical Drama, Tattoos, Christmas, First Kiss/Time, Eventual Happy Ending, Love Confessions, Doctor John, Sexuality Crisis, Slow Burn, Case Fic, Drugging, Blow/Hand Job, Emotional Love Making, Parenthood, Passage of Time) – What if His Last Vow never happened? This fic picks up a few months after John and Mary's wedding, in an alternate universe where Magnussen doesn't exist, but Mary is still pregnant. Life continues -- just in a different direction. And slowly, Sherlock and John find their way to each other.

Swallow the Night by ArwaMachine (E, 87,873 w., 15 Ch. || TSo3/Stag Night Fix It, TAB/S4 Divergence, Toplock, Mutual Pining, PWP, Drunk / Public Sex, Anal Fingering/Sex, Alcohol-Induced Amnesia, Everyone Knows Except Them, Emotional Love Confession, Demisexual Sherlock, Internalized Homophobia [John], Parentlock with Rosie, First Kiss, Drug Relapse, Infidelity, Texting, Masturbation, Oblivious John, Emotional Love Making, Angst with Happy Ending, Dreams and Nightmares) – “Do you know how long,” John panted, his cheek scraping against the wall, looking back at Sherlock through half-closed eyes, “I’ve wanted this?” Sherlock pressed himself against John’s back, biting at John’s ear. “Not nearly as long as I have,” he whispered.

Kintsukuroi by sussexbound (E, 91,823 w., 20 Ch. || S4 Compliant / Post-TLD, Grief / Mourning, PTSD, Internalized Homophobia, Therapy, Past Abuse, Alcohol Abuse, Nightmares, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Depression, Anxiety, Bed Sharing, Love Confessions, Cuddling, Suicidal Ideation, Masturbation, Minor Character Death, Sexting, Frottage, Inexperienced Sherlock, Rimming / Anal / BJ’s, Emotional Turmoil, Finding Each Other) – “I love you.” Sherlock sees the words hit John with almost physical force. He reels back a little, jaw twitching and eyes filling. “I love you,” he repeats, a little softer, a little more gentle, as earnest as he possibly can. Because they’ve been teetering on the brink of this thing for years, and it had become painfully obvious over the last few months that they were at a tipping point. This had to happen. Now it has. Now they can see where they end up. The tears in John’s eyes spill over, and he wipes at them angrily. “Do you even know what that means?”

#steph replies #johnlock fic recs #my fic recs #internalized homophobia fics

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jujumin-translates · 7 months ago

Text

★ Main Story | Act 13 - Budding Spring | Chapter 5 - The Curtain Rises on a New Era

momo has entered the chat.

momo: Isn’t it like so awesome and fun to have the Fleur Award decided via voting!? Iv: need help w/ voting? i can set my followers off for u momo: Hmm, it’s fine. I don’t think the troupe members would be happy with votes gotten like that, promoing the performances would be fine tho. Thanks

shiki: I’m sure it’ll all be okay. MANKAI Company can definitely make it to the top of the rankings. momo: IKR? All of their fans have said they’re gonna vote for them, so it’s time to show them our power. We’ll be so so so fine Iv: cheering for u Kar: Good luck momo: I’ll do my best

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

Kazunari: Ah, there’s another notice on the theater forums about the launch of a new troupe.

Tsumugi: There’s more on the bulletin board on Veludo Way too. Usually, there’s only one or two of them, but there were about ten last I checked.

Tasuku: There’s a lot of recruitment for new members going on too. And a lot of troupes that went dormant have come out of hiding again.

Banri: I mean, with anyone bein’ able to enter and a fuck-ton of prize money like that, who wouldn’t think of givin’ it another shot?

Sakuya: And with live streams of performances counting for votes, it gives non-local troupes a chance too.

Sakyo: Even though the Board of Directors used to go around to different regions, it was still just limited to well-known theater companies.

Taichi: Student theater groups from famous colleges have announced that they’re gonna participate, and I’ve heard that performers and influencers are announcing the launch of new theater companies too.

Yuki: Theater companies started like that are bound to get a lot of SNS Votes.

Citron: We are truly entering the age of core between the theater fractions!

Tsuzuru: Are you trying to say “war between the theater factions”?

Omi: It’s just like what Yukio-san said at the press conference, it really is bringing life to the theater world.

Izumi: It’s really starting to feel like the new Fleur Award has actually been put into motion.

Homare: The flow of change is necessary to keep the waters from clouding. Too strong of a flow, however, would leave us in a calamity.

Muku: A calamity…!?

Kumon: What are we gonna do if everything goes downhill…!?

Sakyo: Up until this point, the limited number of theater companies meant we all had to compete to catch the attention of the Board of Directors, but now with this, we’re going to need to change the way we fight drastically.

Azami: Maybe we need to start thinkin’ up a new game plan.

Itaru: The OGs, like GOD-za, Hyakka, and Yuzo-san’s troupe, don’t seem like they’re pulling out any special moves towards the Newborn Fleur Award, though.

Itaru: They’ve pretty much just been seeking out votes online.

Chikage: I suppose we’ll just have to wait and see.

Guy: With all that said, the votes cast online during the pre-voting period do not affect the final election. It would be better to just remain calm and observe what’s happening around us, would it not?

Azuma: Right, if we don’t plan our strategy carefully, we won’t be able to make any moves even if we want to.

Izumi: That’s true…

Kazunari: Director-chan, what’s going on with that Spring Troupe workshop you were planning?

Izumi: A-Ah, right, that!

Sakyo: I don’t think that’ll do much for us given the current situation.

Yuki: Why not have it after the pre-voting is done and things have calmed down a bit?

Izumi: Right… we’ll put it on hold for now, then.

Kazunari: ‘Kaykay~!

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

Muku: Ten minutes left…

Juza: Ten minutes, ‘leven seconds, if anyone’s countin’.

Yuki: The more I watch, the more they start looking like statues.

Misumi: Muku and Juza are like rocks that won’t move~.

Tsuzuru: It’s not like this is going to decide who wins the Fleur Award or anything, so just calm down, okay, you two?

Banri: Think you should be tellin’ yourself that given that you’ve gotten up to aimlessly check the fridge about ten times already, Tsuzuru.

Izumi: Well, I mean, you can’t help but wonder.

Izumi: (Today’s finally the day they announce the pre-voting results… even though it’s not going to affect the real thing, my stomach’s in knots just thinking about it…)

*Door opens*

Itaru: We’re home.

Chikage: Made it just in time for the announcement.

Homare: Seems like we’ve all managed to wander in here, one way or another.

Azuma: It is best to receive information like this in a group, after all.

Tasuku: If the outcome’s good, we can all be happy together, and if the outcome’s bad, it’ll be just a little better because we’re not alone.

Citron: It is kind of eggciting, like waiting for exam results~!

Kumon: C’mon already… ah~, I can’t take it anymore…!

Hisoka: …Ah.

Izumi: !?

Citron: Are the results in!?

Hisoka: I ran out of marshmallows…

Taichi: Don’t confuse us like that…!

Omi: Well, we’ve become a pretty well-known theater company, so there’s no need to be so worried about it, right?

Tenma: I mean, we did win the Fleur Special Award, plus our ticket sales have been pretty consistent lately.

Taichi: Right! And all we need is to be in the top ten to get nominated!

Sakuya: And even if we’re a little below the top ten, we can work on improving our rank throughout the year!

Kazunari: Ah! The pre-voting rankings are in~!

Azami: The total number of theaters that entered was 6333…

Kumon: This is way too harsh to trace back from the bottom…!

Muku: But if our name shows up too soon, that’d be a huge shock.

Itaru: --Found it.

Sakuya: S-Seventieth��?

Taichi: WHAT!? I thought for sure we’d at least be in the top twenty!

Izumi: This is…

Tsuzuru: There wouldn’t happen to be a theater with the same name as ours, right…?

Chikage: No, I checked who was in first place, just in case, but this is the only MANKAI Company.

Itaru: At least we’re in the top hundred, but…

Sakyo: Considering only the top ten are nominated, it’s low.

Sakuya: Does this mean we won’t even get nominated as we are now…?

[ ⇠ Previous Part ] • [ Next Part ⇢ ]

#a3!#a3! translation #// too many characters i give up on trying to tag them

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batmanisagatewaydrug · 9 months ago

Note

Hey Sex Witch!

How did you get into Sex-Ed work? Is this only an online thing or your irl job?

Just curious! Thanks for all the advice and all the extra stuff!

god I fucking with this was my real job, but I've only gotten paid for a sex ed gig exactly one (1) time in almost ten years lmao.

which isn't to say I only do it online; I do a ton of irl work, too! right now I'm teaching classes for some kiddos at a local unitarian church and putting together a sexual health carnival at my day job. I've also presented at conferences, organized a sex educators' conference for the national lgbtq+ task force, and done a ton of other miscellaneous work wherever people will let me.

I got into it completely by accident, when I made a post during my freshman year of college sharing a text convo with my younger sister while she was going through her own high school sex ed class. people started sending me their own sex ed q's and Have Not Stopped.

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tinynerdz360 · 1 month ago

Text

Above and Beyond Chapter 8: First Contact?

With a simple press of a button an image was released to the public; an image that would set the internet ablaze: an enigmatic alien boy with snow-white hair and piercing green eyes, standing with the Ares Crew. His build was of a scrawny teenager compared to the adult astronauts.

The questions came fast —Was this incontrovertible proof of extraterrestrial life? Had the government been harboring cosmic secrets all along?

The unknown employee smirked at his handy work. He felt pleased at what he had done, and not an ounce of shame or regret. This would set the necessary wheels into motion.

***

Hashtags and buzzwords spread like wildfire across social media as the leaked image of Dantom went viral. Theories abounded, ranging from measured skepticism to wild-eyed conspiracy.

"Alien Boy Among Astronauts – What Is NASA Hiding?"

"NASA discovers evidence of aliens on Mars #LittleGreenMen #WeAreNotAlone"

"Leaked photo reveals hidden extraterrestrial, are they walking among us? #Area51Revealed #TruthIsOutThere"

"Press conference DEMANDED - what is @NASA hiding from the American people? Full transparency now! #ReleaseTheAliens #NASACoverup"

Teddy Sanders scrolled through the endless stream of tweets, a scowl etched on his brow, fingers drumming an agitated rhythm on his mahogany desk. They had planned to let the public know, he was hoping to do this on his own terms. That they would be able to delay for a little bit longer. An alien discovery was one of those cases where NASA had wanted to give its own government a heads up and time to process this world-changing event.

But soon after getting the crew picture with Dantom, someone leaked it to the public.

With a heavy sigh, Teddy picked up the phone and dialed the president. This conversation wasn't going to be pleasant.

The call clicked through. "Mr. President, we have a situation." Teddy gripped the receiver with white knuckles. "An unauthorized image of the entity has been leaked. It's spreading rapidly online."

"God damnit, Mr. Sanders!" President Davis' voice boomed through the line, frustration palpable. "I thought I made it crystal clear - no leaks, period. You assured me NASA had this under control."

Teddy winced, feeling the sharp sting of failure. "Sir, I apologize. We're investigating the source of the breach. But right now, we need to get in front of this. The media sharks are circling, demanding answers. And I’d like to point out, that NASA did not have to tell you first. We are a public domain; the public would be told eventually. It’s just happening sooner than later."

Tense hung between them. "I see. I assume we’re on the same page?” Davis asked.

“The page being the emphasis of peaceful contact and diplomacy?” Teddy emphasized.

“Yes, yes, of course.” The President replied. Teddy could just imagine him waving his hand in the air in dismissal. The line clicked dead.

Teddy leaned back in his chair, rubbing his throbbing temples. This alien kid was proving to be more trouble than he ever imagined. As speculation raged out of control, time was of the essence. They needed to seize the narrative before it spiraled beyond their grasp.

With a deep breath, Teddy reached for his computer mouse and clicked open his saved draft of his speech.

***

The cameras flashed incessantly as Teddy Sanders stepped up to the podium, the NASA logo emblazoned on the wall behind him. He cleared his throat, his heart pounding against his ribs. "Good afternoon, everyone. Thank you for being here today."

He glanced down at his carefully prepared notes. "As many of you are aware, an image has been circulating online depicting what appears to be an extraterrestrial being alongside our Ares crew on Mars." Murmurs rippled through the room, but Teddy pressed on.

"I can confirm that this image is authentic. During their mission, our astronauts encountered a juvenile alien life form, which we have come to learn is named 'Dantom.' This alien child was injured, and our crew has been assisting him and successfully making peaceful contact.

The room erupted into a frenzy of shouted questions and camera flashes. Teddy raised his hands, attempting to quiet the crowd. "Please, let me finish. We understand the monumental significance of this discovery and the delicate nature of the situation. Our top priority is ensuring the well-being of Dantom and maintaining a peaceful relationship with any potential extraterrestrial civilizations."

He took a deep breath, his voice growing more solemn. "We face unprecedented challenges in navigating this uncharted territory. But I assure you, we are proceeding with the utmost caution and respect. NASA, in collaboration with the government, is committed to transparency and will provide regular updates as the situation unfolds. Thank you."

As Teddy stepped away from the podium, the room exploded with a barrage of questions.

***

President Alfred Davis stood tall behind the lecture podium, he had handsome dark skin, and a charming smile. His presence commanding the attention of the entire nation. The cameras zoomed in on his confident smile, capturing the historic moment. "My fellow Americans," he began, his deep voice resonating through the room, "today, we stand on the precipice of a new era for humanity."

He paused, letting the gravity of his words sink in. "The discovery of an alien child, Dantom, on Mars is a testament to the boundless possibilities that await us in the vastness of space. This is not a moment for fear or apprehension, but one of hope and opportunity."

Davis leaned forward, his eyes gleaming with ambition. "As your President, I am committed to fostering peaceful contact and maintaining good relations with Dantom's species."

"We must approach this situation with wisdom, compassion, and an open mind," he continued, his voice growing more impassioned. "I call upon all nations to join us in this endeavor, to set aside our differences and work together for the betterment of all sentient beings."

Behind the veneer of diplomatic ambition, those closest to him recognized the undercurrent of self-interest. To be the President who welcomed aliens to Earth, who brokered alliances among the stars—it was a legacy any leader would covet. And one that Alfred Davis craved more than anything else.

As the audience erupted in applause, Davis basked in the moment, his ego swelling with each camera flash. *This is my destiny,* he thought, his smile widening.

***

The scene shifts to a bustling newsroom where reporters from various international outlets scramble to cover the breaking story. On a large television screen, a stern-faced journalist from the BBC delivers a scathing report.

"While the discovery of an alien child is indeed a momentous occasion, many world leaders are expressing their disappointment and frustration with President Davis's decision to keep this information hidden from the international community."

The camera cuts to a press conference, where the UN Secretary addresses a room full of journalists. "Transparency is crucial in matters of global significance," she states, her voice laced with a mix of relief and irritation. "While we are thankful that first contact was handled peacefully, the lack of communication and cooperation from the United States government is deeply concerning."

Meanwhile, on the streets of New York, a reporter wove through the crowd, microphone in hand, capturing the pulse of public opinion.

A middle-aged man in a suit shakes his head, his face etched with concern. "I don't trust it," he says, his voice tinged with xenophobia. "For all we know, this could be the beginning of an invasion. We need to protect our own first."

Not far from him, a middle-aged woman shrugged nonchalantly. "I'm neutral about it. If they wanted to harm us, wouldn't they have done so already?"

Next, a young woman steps up to the microphone. "I think it's incredible!" she exclaims, her enthusiasm palpable. "Just imagine what we could learn from them. This could be the start of something truly amazing."

The reporter approaches an elderly couple walking hand in hand. The man shrugs, his expression neutral. "I've seen a lot in my life," he says, his voice gruff but not unkind. "Aliens? Well, I suppose it was only a matter of time. As long as they come in peace, I've got no problem with it."

Excitement bubbled up in the form of a group of people of various ages all clad in sci-fi merchandise, their eyes bright and voices animated.

"Can you imagine? Actual aliens!" one exclaimed. "This could be the dawn of a whole new era, like...like Star Trek coming to life!"

"Think of what we could learn from them!" another chimed in, practically bouncing on their toes.

As the interviews continue, the divided reactions of the public become increasingly apparent. Some express fear and mistrust, while others embrace the possibility of interstellar friendship. The reporter turns to the camera, her face a mix of excitement and uncertainty.

"One thing is clear," the reporter says, her voice steady. "The world will never be the same again. As we stand on the precipice of a new era, it is up to all of us to decide how we will navigate this uncharted territory and shape the future of human-alien relations."

***

In the flickering glow of the living room TV, the residents of Amity Park clustered together as the evening news shifted to a breaking story. Amidst the collective gasp that rose from the townspeople, there lay a thread of recognition that twisted their shock into bewildered concern and confusion.

"Isn't that... Inviso-BILL?" someone trailed off, lips quivering in disbelief.

"Can't be; I thought he was a ghost, not an alien," another murmured.

Dash Baxter dropped his plate of pizza as the camera zoomed in. “Danny Phantom! So that’s where he’s been. In Space! So COOL!

"Is that... Danny Phantom?" Paulina asks, her voice laced with disbelief. "What's he doing on Mars?"

"Oh, WOW! I guess he was an alien this whole time.” Star said.

“Does this mean we had first contact? Kinda sucks that NASA’s stealing credit,” Kwan remarked.

As the news spreads, the people of Amity Park find themselves grappling with a mix of emotions. Some express concern for their beloved hero, wondering if his presence on Mars means he's left them vulnerable to ghostly attacks. Others wonder if he was always an alien and not a ghost. Some wonder once again why The World never bothered with Amity Park's business.

---

Across town, in the privacy of Sam's bedroom, three figures huddled around her laptop. Sam, Tucker, and Jazz watched the same broadcast, but their reactions diverged sharply from the rest of Amity Park. As the image of Danny—no, Dantom—flashed across the screen, relief washed over their faces like the first rays of dawn after a long, harrowing night.

"He's alive," Jazz whispers, her voice trembling with relief. "He's alive, and he's on Mars."

Sam stops pacing and leans over their shoulders; her brow furrowed with worry. "But why is he pretending to be an alien? What happened to him?"

"You know, only Danny can make first contact happen by being the alien.” Tucker chuckled, though the sound was shaky, relief undercutting the humor. "Classic Danny."

Jazz took a deep breath in and out, calming her anxiety. Her hands clasped so tightly that her knuckles turned white. "This whole week...we thought the GIW finally got him." She let go of a breath she didn't realize she'd been holding.

Their search had been relentless, scouring every corner, confronting every specter with the same desperate question: Where is Danny? But each inquiry led only to dead ends and mounting despair. They had been in the middle of making plans to infiltrate the GIW to see if they had him and rescue Danny if they had to. Sam had been ready to take any means necessary to save her best friend.

Sam stands up, her eyes blazing with resolve. "We're going to D.C.," she declares, her voice unwavering. "If Danny needs us, we'll be there for him. No matter what."

“Wow! Wait, if he’s on Mars, it will take them months to return. And they haven’t even left Mars yet.” Jazz quickly pointed out.

“I know that I’m not stupid.” Sam glared. “But my gut tells me; we need to be the ones to inform NASA of the truth. Do you really think the government will sit by and play 'first contact tea party' with him? Do you really think that they won’t sic the GIW on him the first chance they have? I say we go, so we can be his backup. We can see what NASA knows and see if they can be allies. If not, WE get Danny out of there. Distract them, find a way to give him an opening. What if they greet him with ecto guns and shoot him down before he can run or poison him somehow? He might not be able to get out!” Sam ranted.

Jazz stared at the other teen. Her face turning from worry to determination. “You’re right. We don’t know what NASA knows. If they truly want to help, we might be the only ones that can give them the correct information. We can’t trust the government to play nice……I mean, they already keep Amity in the dark and out of the eye of the world.” Jazz crossed her arms; she hunched her shoulders up in concerned thought. “I’m honestly surprised they haven’t done worse to us. Especially with the anti-ecto policy. They could drag any of us off the streets.”

Tucker nods, his fingers already flying across the keyboard. "I'll start digging into NASA's servers, see if I can find any information about what they know and what their intentions are.”

"Right," Jazz agreed, already pulling out her phone to look up flights. "He might have kept his secret from NASA, but the GIW must know by now, which means the government knows. Which means…... Danny is on borrowed time.”

"We've got his back," Tucker finished, his usual jovial demeanor replaced by the steadfast resolve of a friend ready to wade into the unknown. "Just like he's always had ours."

***

Jack Fenton's fist slammed down onto the console in his lab, causing a small eruption of sparks from the machinery. "That darn Phantom!" he bellowed, glaring at the image on the computer screen that showed Danny Phantom, or 'Dantom' as the media had begun to call the figure, standing amongst the astronauts on Mars.

"Jack, calm down," Maddie pleaded, her voice strained with concern, her eyes not leaving the second monitor that displayed a map with their son Danny's last known locations—each point a dead end.

"Can't you see what he's doing, Maddie? Pretending to be an alien just to gain fame! It's infuriating!" Jack's face was red with anger, and his hands shook as he raked them through his hair.

"Jack, please," Maddie said, her own frustration barely contained. "We need to focus. Our son is still missing, and if Phantom is on Mars, then he couldn't have taken Danny." Her voice broke slightly on their son's name, revealing the depth of her fear.

"Then who did?" Jack's question hung heavy in the air, unanswered. Together, they returned to the task at hand, capturing and interrogating any spectral entity they could find, hoping one of them held the key to Danny's whereabouts. But it had already been a week. They both felt the cold tendrils of fear crawl into their hearts. The more time that passed without a lead to Danny, the odds of them never finding him increased. The police hadn’t been able to find anything either. Both Jack and Maddie were convinced that a ghost had done it, not the living.

Jack wraps his arms around his wife, pulling her close as he tries to hold back his own tears. "We'll find him, Maddie. We won't rest until we bring Danny home safe and sound. And if a ghost did take him, they'll have to answer to the Fentons."

***

Meanwhile, in his mansion, Vlad Masters paces back and forth, his eyes glued to the television screen. He watches as the news anchors gush over the incredible discovery of an alien child on Mars, his fists clenching tighter with each passing minute.

"Damn you, Daniel," he mutters under his breath, his voice dripping with venom. "Of all the attention-seeking stunts you could have pulled, you just had to go and become the world's most famous alien."

Vlad's mind races with possibilities, his anger warring with his ever-present concern of maintaining his own secret identity. "As long as that brat keeps his mouth shut about our true nature, I suppose I can let him bask in the limelight for now," he muses, a calculating glint in his eye.

“But be careful, little Badger, one slip up, and I’ll have you locked away for all eternity.” Vlad thought. He could live without making him his adopted son. After all, without that pesky brat getting in the way, he could kill Jack and take Maddie all for himself. He could always make more sons.

With a final glance at the television, Vlad settles into his armchair; his fingers steepled as he begins to plot his next move. He knows that patience is key, and he's more than willing to bide his time until the perfect moment arises to strike.

***

A cacophony of angry voices rebounded off the walls in the stark, sterile confines of the GIW’s operations center. Agents clad in their customary suits huddled around monitors that showed an endless loop of the image that had ignited worldwide speculation.

"Sir, the public's eating this up," a junior analyst said, tapping her tablet to bring up social media reactions. "Public opinions are mostly positive.”

Agent A glared in anger. “We can't let Phantom continue this masquerade. It's... it's a national security threat!"

Agent O nods in agreement, his jaw set in a grim line. "We need to get the President on our side. If we can convince him that Phantom is a danger to the country, he'll have no choice but to hand him over to us."

"And once we have Phantom in our custody, we'll make him pay for his deceit," Agent K adds, a cruel smirk twisting his features. "We'll expose him for the evil entity he truly is, and the world will finally see ghosts for the evil beings they are."

Agent A nodded, his expression unreadable behind dark glasses. "Move up the meeting with President Davis by force if necessary. He’ll understand once we explain," he ordered, his voice calm but carrying an undercurrent of urgency. "It's time we exposed the truth about ghosts, starting with Danny Phantom."

They had been working with the mole in the White House to set up a meeting, but it was clear they needed to educate the higher government sooner rather than later. They would understand and forgive the need for secrecy. Agent A could just see the President agreeing that the GIW needed to take funds in secret.

Agent A paused a nagging thought clawed at the back of his mind. “Agent O, how about you take this mission? I want you to meet with the President. Can I trust you? To make the President understand by any means necessary?”

Agent O straightened, purpose igniting within him. "Yes, Director. I'll make sure the president understands the gravity of the situation. I’ll do whatever it takes; you can count on me!"

As agents scurried to carry out their orders, TVs nationwide aired President Davis' call for unity and cooperation with the alien species. The channel switched to an UN assembly where diplomats voiced their concerns and criticisms, the atmosphere fraught with tension.

***Back on Mars****

Commander Melissa Lewis glanced at the beds lining the wall, her gaze lingering on the one where Dantom lay curled up, seemingly asleep.

"Alright, let's keep it down," she murmured, her voice carrying the authority.

"Let's go over our tasks once more," Lewis began, her eyes scanning the expectant faces. "We need to find a way to get Dantom what he needs —"

"Commander," interrupted Johanssen, her brow furrowed. I think we need to address the elephant in the room first." She gestured subtly toward Danny, " like how he can speak English and how Vogal can speak this alien language.”

Lewis nodded slowly, acknowledging the point. "You're right, Beth. This situation with Dantom... it's complicated things."

"Complicated is an understatement," Rick Martinez chimed in, his skepticism a stark contrast to his usually jovial demeanor. "He lied to us about speaking English. What else isn't he telling us?"

"Exactly," Lewis agreed, her hands clasped tightly in front of her. "It concerns me deeply. Not just that he wasn't honest from the start but also that his interaction with humanity has obviously been negative. If someone on Earth hurt him... We need to be careful how we handle this."

"Whatever his reasons for hiding the truth," Lewis continued, her voice firm yet tinged with empathy, "we have to remember he's just a kid. And he's scared. Let's not forget that."

Alex Vogel cleared his throat, drawing the room's focus. He stood with an engineer's precision, his face somber yet earnest. "I spoke with Dantom," he glanced toward the slumbering figure. "And I believe I understand how we can communicate."

The others leaned in, curiosity piqued.

"Back in Germany, when I was a child, I nearly drowned in a lake during a family outing," Vogel began, his voice steady despite the personal nature of his story. "From what Dantom told me, experiences like that allow for one to understand and, in some circumstances, speak what he calls, ‘Soul Speak’.”

"Wait, you're saying because you almost died once, you can understand him?" Rick Martinez interjected, disbelief etching his features. "That sounds like something out of a fantasy."

"Perhaps it does," Vogel conceded with a nod. “But We don’t have much else to go on.”

“I can’t prove anything or disprove anything, for that matter. Nothing stands out in Vogel’s vitals, and nothing that stands out as odd from everyone else.” Beck said.

"Sure, but English? How does some near-death childhood experience explain him knowing our language?" Rick pressed, folding his arms across his chest as he scrutinized Vogel with a sharp gaze.

Vogel met Rick's skepticism with a calm resolve. "I do not claim to have all the answers, Rick. But our communication transcended mere words. It was as if we connected on a level beyond language—a shared understanding."

Rick's frown deepened, and he looked away. There was no protocol for otherworldly linguistics.

"Regardless of how it works," Vogel continued, addressing the group, "it's clear that Dantom has knowledge far exceeding our own in certain areas. We should consider the potential for learning from him."

Beth Johanssen leaned forward. “From what he said, he’s been on earth before, maybe he’s been there awhile…...but clearly someone hurt him….” Beth pointed out, trailing off with a hint of sadness in her tone.

Chris Beck shifted in his chair, the physician in him analyzing the boy's reactions from earlier interactions. "That would mean he's been among us—hiding in plain sight, or worse, a captive……someone hurt him, and it’s possible he learned English from his captors. And it would explain why he lied to us…...he was scared.”

Commander Lewis gave a heavy sigh. “We better hope it wasn’t the US government. THAT will complicate things.”

“Still doesn’t explain how he got here, and yes, I know he said by portal…...but a lot is missing from that story,” Mark commented.

“Maybe he found a way back to this ‘infinity realm’ as he escaped somehow. Maybe he got caught, then escaped, and then somehow ended up here?” Rick babbled on.

Vogel sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “We really don’t know how these ‘portals’ work and even how much of what the kid said was the truth.”

Beck crossed his arms in thought. “Either way, he needs this ecto-deposit. He’s weak. If we want to help him, we either find the deposit here or leave for earth.”

“I’ll contact command, I think our best bet is getting him back to earth.” Commander Lewis said. She turned to her computer screen to send off the message.

Mark Watney stepped up to Lewis’s side. He leaned over and whispered to her. “Maybe find a way to let command know that someone hurt him back on Earth.”

*sigh* “I plan to Watney.” Lewis replied.

“Yeah, but are you adding in the possibility it was us…. like the US government? Like this could be our fault, well, not OUR fault, but someone down there. What I’m trying to say is that we should come up with a backup plan to make sure he’s safe and we’re not handing him over to the wrong people.”

Lewis frowned. NASA would not like to hear this theory. But with NASA being a more public institution they might have a chance at protecting the kid or at least making him known to the public. “Keeping him in the public eye should help…...not just our public but the world.”

“Right! THAT way they can’t lock him away in area 51.” Mark replied.

Chapter 9

#danny phantom #danny in space #danny phantom au #danny fenton #mark watney #the martian #Crossover #fanfiction #my writing

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bbymunsonx · 5 months ago

Text

The Last Time (Ted's Version)

Chapter Four

chapter warnings: language, implied sexual content, sexual tension hehe

word count: 2.4k

After embarrassingly crying to Ted about my sex life, I quickly had to run back to my flat before I embarrassed myself even more.

When I get back to my flat, I took out my laptop and started to Google all the players on the team. Jamie Tartt, Roy Kent, Sam Obisanya. I even decided to Google Ted, purely out of curiosity. I thought I'd get a bit more caught up before our first official day of work.

Jamie's results were what I expected. I'm definitely gonna have to work on his branding, I thought to myself.

Roy's results were pretty clean. Most of the articles just talked about how he should start to think about retiring because of his age and his supposed knee problem.

Sam's results were about how he came to England from Nigeria to play for AFC Richmond. In every interview he does, he mostly just talks about how much he misses home.

Ted's results made my heart drop. There were some positive things about him, but most of the things that people were saying about him online were sickening.

Ted Lasso: Richmond's New Hillbilly Coach.

One of the links had a video of Ted with the Wichita State Football Team. It looked like the team was in the locker room after winning a game, where they were all dancing with Ted. The football players all honestly looked like they adored that man. One of the football players in question, Julian Silva, my lovely ex-boyfriend.

After getting to know Ted better, seeing footage of him and Julian together is enough to make my stomach churn. They are complete polar opposites. Knowing Ted, he was probably way too kind to him. A lot kinder than he deserved.

***

The next day was our first "official" day at AFC Richmond. Naturally, Ted welcomed me at my front door with a coffee in one hand and a box of fresh made biscuits in the other.

"What's this?" I asked while taking the box.

"Just a little something. You gotta let me know how they are before I give 'em to the boss. Just take a little nibble." Ted eagerly waited for me to take a bite.

"Holy shit-" I said with a mouth full of biscuits, "This is delightful. How the hell do you know how to make this shit?"

"Google... and baking shows, of course." Ted answered.

"The Great British Bake Off baby," Coach Beard chipped in.

"I'm telling you, you two become more and more interesting by the day."

When we arrived at the stadium, we all went our separate ways. Ted went to find Rebecca to give her his homemade biscuits, Coach Beard went out on the pitch, and I found my way down to my office.

Being logged onto Richmond's socials and keeping an eye on all the comments, especially the comments revolving around Ted, was quite exhausting already. People on the internet could be so cruel. After moderating their socials for a bit, I found a livestream from Richmond's official page that they were doing a press conference, right now.

Shit, Ted probably had no idea they were dong this, I thought to myself. After reading the comments, it seemed like probably one out of ten people had something nice to say. Then it went down to zero after Ted had accidentally spit on the entire audience of journalists. Today was going to be a long day.

After closing my laptop for a quick breather, someone knocked on my door. "Anyone in here?"

"Yeah, come on in." I responded. In came a girl that I thought looked vaguely familiar. She looked around my age, maybe a little bit older than me. Where have I seen her before?

"Hello! I just wanted to come and meet you in person! I'm Keeley Jones!" She came running up to me and giving me a hug.

"Hi! I'm Lacy." I hugged her back, why not?

"I know! God, you're fucking fit." She took a step back and really stared at me for a second.

"I'm not really sure what that means, but thanks!" I awkwardly laughed. "So what do you do around here?"

"I'm kinda famous for being almost famous, if that makes sense. I was with Jamie Tartt for a little, but we actually broke up a few days ago. I do a lot of PR work for the team, too, yeah?"

"Oh shit," I exhaled. Now I know where I know her. She came up when I was looking up Jamie earlier. Thank God I'm not a homewrecker.

"But I'm not taking your job or anything. You're actually way more qualified than me." Keeley laughed. "We'll be working together, if that's alright. I do more of the 'getting them sponsorships' and shit and you're more of their public image of the players and the overall club. I have a feeling we're gonna be great friends, Lace." Keeley smiled.

"Me too, Keeley." I smiled back.

***

"Lacy, come in here a second, would ya?" Ted called from his desk to mine. I'd been splitting my time evenly between being on the pitch with the coaches and the players and being in my office. I wanted to make sure I knew what they were doing, but I also wanted to make sure I was doing my job and moderating their socials.

"Yes, Coach?" I said with my voice slightly raised and my lashes fluttered, obviously being facetious. Why not have some fun and spice up the day? I decided to get comfortable and sit atop of his desk.

After clearing his throat, visibly affected by my comment, Ted managed to say, "I wanna throw a birthday party for Sam. He's just feeling a bit homesick at the moment and he needs to know that we're on his side. So are you free tonight?"

"What makes you think I'd literally be doing anything else?" I raised an eyebrow.

"Well, I didn't know if you had plans with a certain Mr. Ja-," Ted laughed as I cut him off.

"No, Ted. I will be there."

"Great, see you later," Ted got up and touched my arm before leaving the office, causing my heart to almost fall out of ass as I looked over at Coach Beard, who of course, had his head in a book and didn't witness any of what happened. Ted always touches people in their arms when he talks to them. That's just his thing.

"Are you gonna go to the party tonight, Beardo?" I asked.

"Beardo?" I finally got him to put the book down.

"Is that alright?" I questioned. Maybe Ted touching my arm is causing me to act all weird.

Beard took a second to think before responding with, "I'll allow it." He then got up and left the office, leaving me just sitting there on Ted's desk, all alone.

***

After going back to my flat and getting ready for the party, I settled on a little cocktail dress that Rebecca put in my closet.

Ted Lasso: You ready, spaghetti?

Lacy Watson: As ready as I'm gonna be.

Coach Beard: Can I bring a girl I met today?

Lacy Watson: When did you meet a girl? You were at work all day?

Ted Lasso: We're just gonna keep tonight a work casual thing. If she's like any of your other gals, we don't wanna scare Sam. Maybe next time, Bud.

Coach Beard disliked " We're just gonna keep tonight a work casual thing. If she's like any of your other gals, we don't wanna scare Sam. Maybe next time, Bud."

Rhythmic knocks rapped against my door. "Come in!" I yelled down. A few sets of footsteps came up my stairs when suddenly Ted and Coach Beard rounded the corner into my living room. A part of me panicked realizing this was their first time in my flat.

"Look at you!" Ted called out to me, causing me to roll my eyes.

"Let's just go." I groaned.

I wore my sneakers during the walk so I wasn't suffering in my heals. When we arrived at the stadium, Ted had sent Coach Beard in while he helped me change into my heals that I brought in my bag. Ted, being the gentleman he is, knelt to the ground to help give me some balance.

"Are you nervous about seeing Jamie? You didn't really see him today at training." Ted questioned, while letting me hold onto his shoulders while putting on my heals.

"I'm not that bothered by it. Either way, tonight is all about making Sam feel at home. I have to put my stupid boy drama aside for the night."

"Panda?" Ted looked up at me. There was just something about this man knelt before me, looking up at me, that made my stomach do acrobatics.

"I think we should choose a different word. There's just something about a grown man saying the word panda that's just a little funny," I joked to change the subject.

"Whatever you want." Ted looked down and smirked. Just as he was about to say something else, Coach Beard came running outside, huffing all out of breath.

"There you guys are! I thought you got lost!" He exclaimed.

"You're such a smart-ass." I laughed. Ted got off his knees and escorted Coach Beard and I into the stadium.

Football players were standing all throughout the locker room with drinks in their hand, deep in conversation. The locker room was filled with balloons, streamers, and miscellaneous birthday decorations. "Who did this?" I questioned.

"Oh, that would be me." Nate came out of nowhere.

"You did an awesome job, Nate-dawg. It looks great." Ted slapped Nate on the back, to which he smiled.

"Yeah, this looks awesome, Nate." I smiled at him. "If you'll excuse me, real quick. I'm gonna go find Sam."

After looking around the locker room, I found Sam deep in conversation with Colin Hughes. "Hi, Sam! Happy birthday!" I went to shake his hand since I didn't formally meet him yet. He pushed my hand away and gave me a hug.

"Thank you, Ms. Watson! This is such an amazing surprise. It's been really hard being away from my family, so thank you for helping me feel less alone."

"Of course, Sam. And please, I'm only four years older than you. Please just call me Lacy."

"Yes, Lacy." Sam smiled back.

"Enjoy the party." I gave Sam a side hug as he continued his conversation with Colin. As I went throughout the locker room, looking to see if Keeley had showed up, I saw the last person I wanted to see, Jamie Tartt.

"Hi, Jamie." I decided to be civil, especially if I have to work with him.

"Hiya, Lacy. Nice party." He took a sip of his drink, probably his second or third drink of the night.

"Hm." I just nodded in response, not really knowing what to say.

"Let's get you a drink." Jamie took my hand to get me a drink. I didn't really feel like a drink tonight, especially because I wanted to get some work done when I got back to my flat.

"That's alright, Jamie. I don't really want to." I looked to my left and saw Ted staring daggers at Jamie. He was on the complete other side of the locker room, so he couldn't even possibly hear what we were saying.

"Cmon, just one drink. For old times sake," Jamie winked at me.

"How can that possibly be for old times sake, that was three days ago." Sometimes Jamie genuinely confused the fuck out of me.

"Just have one drink with me and I'll leave ya alone, yeah? Let's just be civil." Jamie continued to persuade.

As soon as I saw Ted start to walk over to us, I heard a deep voice come from behind me, "She's not having the fucking drink, so get the fuck out of here." Roy Kent.

"No one's talking to you, Grandpa." Jamie looked behind me and stared down Roy.

"Is there an issue going on here, fellas?" Ted finally made his way over, standing directly next to me.

"No one's talking to you, wanker. I'm trying to give Lacy an opportunity with a real man, yeah?" Jamie laughed to himself.

"I think you've had too much to drink tonight, Jamie. How about you just go home before we all do something we regret." Ted sternly said to him. If looks could kill, Jamie would be dead on the floor.

"This party fucking blows anyway." Jamie threw his drink on the floor and walked out. Tears started to form in my eyes. I really wanted to be civil with Jamie, but he may be making that impossible.

"Come here," Ted took my arm and I went with him but stopping him before we got too far.

"Wait a second," I pulled away for a moment to turn around to Roy, "Thank you, Roy." I gave him a tiny hug, to which he grunted and walked away. I was gonna break through him. I could feel it.

I ran back up to Ted as he was talking to Beard, "I'm just gonna take her home. You've got it from here?"

Coach Beard nodded.

***

It was a very silent walk back home with neither one of us knowing exactly what to say.

Ted broke the silence first, "Do you want me to say something to him tomorrow?"

"No, Ted. It's alright. He was drunk. I don't think he's a bad guy, just stupid." I laughed a little, to which Ted nodded.

"Alright, then. Just give me the word and he'll be off my team." Ted responded sternly. No hint of a joke behind his tone. I just nodded.

When we made it back to the flats, Ted stopped at the foyer and as always, asked if I wanted to join him inside for a drink.

"I think I'm gonna call it a night. I gotta catch up on all our socials and I don't even think I have the energy to do that."

"Well, don't work too hard," Ted pointed a finger at me.

"I make no promises. I gotta prove to the boss lady that I'm worth keeping around."

"Touche. Well, have a good night, Lacy Loo."

"Goodnight, Teddy."

He walked into his flat the same time I walked into mine. After the door shut, my back pressed against the door as I felt it difficult to catch my breath. All I could feel were the butterflies in my stomach, trying to pull me into his flat. Though it's only been three days, I had to stop lying to myself. I wasn't just being flirty for the hell of it. I didn't reject Jamie Tartt because he's not a good looking guy.

No. I was falling for Ted Lasso.

Fuck.

authors note: these next few chapters are gonna get sooooo good I love writing jealous Ted and I wanna keep writing more of him hehe I cannot wait to write the gala ep I'll leave it up to your imagination for now. also!! lacy and roy's friendship is gonna be the end of me I swear <3 im gonna try to have a chapter out every other day :)

taglist: @nerdgirljen

#ted lasso #ted lasso x reader #ted lasso x oc #coach beard #roy kent #jamie tartt #apple tv #Jason sudeikis #Rebecca welton #Leslie higgins #sam obisanya #premier league #football #soccer #fanfic #fanfiction

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123pixieaod · 1 year ago

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oh my god your girl daniel was so amazing!!! it was such a treat to read and if you ever have any more thoughts about that universe i would love to hear it!!! <3

Anon, do I ever!!!!

Firstly thank you so much for the kind words 💖 I had never written girl Daniel before so I'm so happy you think she works :)))

Secondly, yes. Yes I do. You have either opened Pandoras Box or a can of worms, depending on which allegory takes your fancy, because I literally cannot stop thinking about insecure Girl Daniel, and what would happen next to her (so I apologise in advance for the upcoming rambles lol).

So, after the time in the gym, Daniel phones Michelle and Michelle has about zero sympathy for her because she is a Working Mother™️ and thinks (possibly correctly) Daniel is a single millionaire professional sportswoman and has no right to be having problems (again going back to this deep rooted misogyny that for a woman having a family is the most important calling for them, and everything else paled in comparison).

And basically Michelle tells Daniel that of course Max would say and think that because Daniel always acts like a 'one of the boys', even as a little child, and dresses as if she doesn't care what people think of her (jealousy now from Michelle that she never felt like she could be that free???)

So Daniel gets off the call and basically decides to change, and the first thing she does is gets fake nails put on. And she goes for these little gell ones with flowers on because Flowers are Feminine.

But at the next race weekend, walking back after the press conference with Max, she realises that the nail onher ring finger has fallen off and just starts to ... cry. Because it feels like the universe's big fat way of telling her she's never going to be desirable and no man will ever want to marry her (and ofc by no man she means Max, but accepting how utterly in love with him she is feels like defeat in a different way). And Max is walking with her to the motorhome of Red Bull/ Alpha Tauri and is slightly freaking out because 😰why is Daniel just staring at her hands😰why is she nearly crying😰 and he asks and that does make her burst into tears because she just feels so pathetic in that moment, and the only thing she can say is one of her new gel nails fell off and she walks away before he can say anything else.

That evening she pretends she's feeling a bit unwell so gets to stay in her driver room and eat dinner alone and feels slightly less miserable because she now has an Even Better Plan ™️ and so she pulls off all the fake nails (flowers? How old is she, six?) and calls her mum asking for advice and is half way through listening to her mums step by step process for straightening her hair when there's a knock on her door and it's Max holding out the lost nail. And as soon as Daniel opens the door he marches in complaining that she should be more careful and that it was under the couch and he got such strange looks from the staff so the next time she should not be so upset over a nail and instead just take another from the box and replace it, and all Daniel is able to say is she didn't buy the gell nails in a box she got them done directly at a nail salon and Max just blinks out at her. And then nods, and mumbles that Kelly orders her online and they come on a box with extra. He looks away as he gentle places the sole gell nail down on her table.

"I suppose it is a good thing then I got it for you, if you had no spares," he mumbles, cheeks suddenly warm, and Daniel just nods and stutters a "thank you" and Max nods again as if they've both been caught doing something embarrassing and leaves quickly. And then Daniel is staring at the nail that Max went back and searched for and found, just for her, and then goes to retrieve all the others she ripped off and begins to carefully glue them back on, refusing to think about what any of it could mean.

ANYWAY then it's time for Daniel's Big Plan™️. This is where she gets her hair professionally straightened and begins to smile with only her lips and tries not to laugh because Girls Don't Have Loud Honking Laughs and wears long sleeves to hide her tattoos and when she's going out she wears dresses and she finally shaves her legs and she learns to wear makeup and trims her eyebrows and waxes the hair on her upper lip and begins to wear jewellery (but only clipon earrings because her race engineer tells her she would be a fucking idiot to try and get her ears pieced and then expect them to not get infected while wearing a racing helmet).

And for a while, she feels good. She feels really good. She likes the way her mother keeps texting her photos that the f1 photographers take of her and telling her how beautiful she looks now. She likes her sister texting her advice on which shoes go with which dresses and saying she's glad Daniel's finally grown up ("usually the tomboy phase only lasts a few years, not two and a bit decades, but at least you're out the other side of it"). She gets attention too, papers writing of "Ricciardo's New Look!" and articles on her "killer figure previously hidden under oversized clothing".

She likes it and she lives for the moment at at a party when they're both drunk and Max brushes his fingers over her long, silver, dangley earrings, saying "pretty," and Daniel feels her chest contracting and Max suddenly drops his hand as if the silver burns, and he looks at her and she looks back and he blinks, Maldives-blue eyes meeting her dark ones lined with eyeliner. "Thanks," she whispers, and he just jerks a nod and then takes a step back, as if there wasn't enough oxygen for the two of them that close together.

But then it slowly turns sour. She gets tired of constantly trying, constantly waking up early to do her makeup and constantly ignoring her favourite, baggy clothes in favour of new, tight shirts and dresses her sister recommends. Her mother sends her another photo, but this time it's just accompanied with "That's a bit revealing don't you think Dani?" When she facetimes her dad with her new smooth, straight hair and makeup and a smile that's always closelipped, he looks sad as he smiles back at her.

She comes P3 at the race before the summer break, and goes out wearing a sequined purple dress her sister encouraged her to buy, which once she wouldn't even consider wearing (she knows her mother would call it borderline obscene with its plunging neck line and high hem). At the last moment, she puts on the earrings Max complimented, refusing to think about the warmth in her chest as she clips them on.

At the party, she gets drunk and finds Max, and he's drinking and Kelly is there too, and she just looks so perfect, and suddenly Daniel feels like a little girl playing dress up. It all comes so natural to Kelly. She doesn't have to try to be feminine and beautiful. She just is. And Max isn't. No matter how many dresses she buys or makeup, she wears or hair heels she nearly twists her ankles on, she won't be Kelly. That's the sort of beauty you're born with, the sort Daniel is so clearly deficient in.

She wants to leave, but Max sees her before she can and weaves his way to her. His cheeks are flushed from drink, and he's wearing a white shirt with the top buttons undone, and he looks so good that she wants to die. "Your earrings," he says, blinking at them before meeting her gaze. "I talked to Victoria. About you."

"Cheers for letting me know," Daniel tries to make a joke but it sounds too bitter to land. Max frowns, no doubt picking up on her tone.

"No, I mean... what I said about you earrings. Last time. About them being pretty."

Daniel suddenly can't breathe. The club is too busy, too dark, too noisy, too much. She wants to leave, wants to suspend this moment in Amber and let his sentence stay unfinished.

"I did not mean it."

And Daniel barks a laugh, her chest aching like it's being crushed. She's so fucking stupid.

"No wait," Max says quickly, cheeks growing hotter. "I did not - I mean, of course I meant it. But they are just earrings. They are pretty because you are wearing them, and you are pretty. I do not -"

"Hi," Kelly materialises beside them, wrapping a perfect, unblemished arm around Max's waist. "Congratulations on the podium Daniel," she says in her sensual accent, the cadence smooth and so unlike the musical, messy lilt of Daniel's Australian one.

She forces a smile. Close lip. She refuses to look at Max. She makes up some excuse about not having a drink. She leaves them.

And then the night gets even more messy and Daniel gets even more drunk and ends up on the dance floor with some creep who keeps putting his hands on her ass no matter how many times she grabs them and raises them to her waist and then a tiny voice is asking her what the fuck are you doing and she leaves and the air is cold on her cheeks and her bare arms and shaven legs and her smooth hair keeps flying into her eyes and she's hugging herself as she's walking aimlessly, and then someone calls her name and it's Max, looking exhausted but significantly more sober then before.

"I did not mean what I said," he continues stubbornly, an echo of previous words, the moment that triggered her desperate attempt to change, sparking this whole fuck up.

"I looked for you," he says with a frown as if Daniel was a misbehaving child.

She snaps, "Maybe I didn't want to see you," and he blinks as if she's slapped him, as if the thought never even occurred to him.

"Yes you did. You always mean what you say." Daniel hugs herself tighter. She looks away. She wants to cry.

"Yes," he allows after a beat. "Okay, I meant what I said but I did not say it how I meant to. I just meant that the earrings are not the things which made you pretty, that -"

"And Victoria told you to say that, did she?" Daniel says, voice back to bitterness.

"No, she didn't," Max replies, his own tone beginning to sound annoyed, like Daniel is intentionally vexing him. "But she did tell... well, she made me think, and what I think is that you are not very happy, Daniel."

Daniel jerks her head up, staring at him.

"What?"

"Happy," he repeats, brows knitted together. "I do not think you are happy."

Nobody has said that to her. She has been praised or accused, her new look attracting attention and labels and names. But in all the rush and noice and chatter, nobody had said that.

"I am happy," she says after a pause, mind racing. "Of course I'm happy. Why wouldn't I be happy?"

His lips thin. "You do not smile any more. Not like how you used to."

Daniel barks out a laugh, feeling something in her chest constrict even further.

So then they have a Big Argument and Max says he does not understand why she has changed her appearance so much if it's making her so miserable and he does not like how she dresses and acts because she's not laughing or smiling anymore and she is not happy. Daniel snaps back that maybe she doesn't give two shits about what he thinks (the irony burning her from the inside out) and the argument gets even worst and eventually Daniel storms off and Max doesnt follow her.

When she gets home she just lays on her bed and cries and doesn't even bother taking off her makeup, even though she knows her mother would scold her and say she'll get spots.

It's summer break and Daniel watches as Kelly posts photo after photo of Max on holidays with her family, and Daniel just... gives up. She didn't care. It was never possible, because she's not like women like Kelly. She's Daniel, and no amount of straightened hair or revealing dresses will change that.

So she throws it all out. She bags all her new clothes into bin bags and leaves it anonymously outside a charity shop. She throws out all her makeup. She gives her straightener to a alpha tauri worker for their daughter. She lets the hair on her upper lip grow back. She goes back to her baggy shirts and ancient ripped jeans and frizzy hair. She stops caring, and it's one of the most freeing things she's ever done. She's Daniel again, Daniel with the crazy curls and oversized shirts. Daniel. Herself again.

Everyone is disappointed. Her mother barely speaks for the entire facetime they do, her lips thin in disapproval as she takes in Daniel's altered style. Her sister snaps at Daniel for wasting her time looking for advice if she was just going back to not bothering about how she looks. The papers declare "Babe-cardo is gone" and publish photos of her wearing dresses and make up as if it's a eulogy.

She is nervous to see Max again, waiting for his expression to fall as he sees she's back to being messy, ugly Daniel. Instead, his face lights up when he walks into the meeting room and sees her. They haven't spoken since their fight, haven't even texted, but Daniel blurts out a stupid joke about how even under the Mediterranean sun Max still has the colouring of a sickly Victorian child, but Max laughs and then Daniel laugh, back to her honking laugh which makes everyone turn and look at her, and just like that she knows her and Max are back to normal.

Only it's more than normal. When everyone else looks at her like she's a let down, Max smiles as if he never quite wants to stop looking at her. When some reporter asks in a patronising manner if she was trying different hair textures to see which is more aerodynamic, Max replies before Daniel can even begin to form a polite PR answer, pointing out George now has a middle parting, and surely that's much more important news then Daniel's curls, and everyone laughs and looks at George as he blushes and tries to stammer out a response. But Daniel just looks at Max, who looks back from across the opposite side of the interviewing coach. And she grins, and then Max grins back and laughs softly, looking away.

And this is pretty much the point where the tags on the fic begin. Max and Daniel are somehow closer than ever. Max keeps giving her compliments, which is new, but they're always such Max compliments Daniel can't help but laugh as he says them. Like "you are only a few seconds behind me, they is very good" or "Daniel, is your bagpack new it is very lovely and big" about a rucksack he's definitely seen her with about a hundreds time before (((but the compliments are never about her physical appearance, which Daniel never actually realises and possibly Max doesnt even realise it either. She's just Daniel, and it's her smile and her sense of humour and her liveliness which makes her beautiful to Max, not how she styles her hair or which clothes she wears))).

So then Daniel finally wins a race and Max is the first to hug her tightly and tell her how amazing she is and how lovely her drive was and of course if be hasn't had engine problems then she would've had a proper fight on her hands but he is sure it is the first of many podiums they'll share and Daniel's just laughing and hugging him back and on the podium she gets Max to do a shoey but holds her shoe to his lips and watches as the champaign runs down over his lips and the buldge of his Adams apple moves with his swallowing and she suddenly feels very drunk and slightly ill, knowing she can't have any of it but now after making her peace with it.

And down below Kelly is like 🤨🤨🤨 and doesn't understand because Max definitely didn't desire Daniel when she tried to be pretty (not very successfully either, she thinks) so how could he find her desirable now in a sweaty race suit and with inked arms dusted with dark hair and wild curls which are more frizz then anything else and a smile which seems almost cartoonist its so unnaturally big???? But she knows what she saw, watching him gently brush a few wayward curls away which had been glued to Daniel's forehead and cheeks by the champaign, watching him drink from her shoe, watching him smile at Daniel as if she's the only thing he can see.

So that night she gives him an ultimate. He has to stop seeing Daniel, or else she'll leave. And Max is like wtf Kelly isn't like other girls she's secure!!! And it's just Daniel!!!! And Kelly just snaps its pathetic and embarrassing how obviously he pines after the weirdo, and Max just goes very still and Kelly tells him Daniel is probably a lesbian anyway from how she dresses (we bringing all types of internalised misogyny in this fic🫠) and they wouldn't make any sense but him and Kelly are perfect, and Max just nods because he doesn't... him and Kelly make Sense. She's beautiful and classy and his dad tells Max that he picked well with her and people in f1 always tell him how lucky he is to have such a beautiful girlfriend and his mum writes "Max and Kelly" in letters now and somehow Max nodding is equating to him texting Daniel, Kelly dictating exactly what to say.

And Daniel gets the text and just sort of feels herself falling apart and it's so unfair because he said her earrings were pretty and then took it back, how could Kelly possibly think she's a threat to her?? But Daniel does what Max asks and doesn't text him and he doesn't text her and at the next race they acknowledge each other as nothing more then professional coworkers and Daniel wonders if this is what heartbreak is like, and how losing Max as a friend is a thousand times worse than when she admitted to herself he'd never find her desirable.

She goes back to Monaco for the two week break. She buys a photo of a shark, this one swimming and alive and looking so real she swears his eyes follow her. She hangs it in her living room. She loves it. She buys flowers. She cleans her apartment. She tries to learn to bake.

Then, a knock on her door. She's half way through baking a possibly unsaveble batch of brownies (she got the salt and sugar mixed up :((( ) and opens the door with an old Red Bull apron, a lá a Red Bull PR Christmas videos from years back, and hair in a wild mess and tattered Aussie slippers and there's Max. And even before she can comprehend he's standing there with a bouquet of especially drooping flowers he's marching in past her, going to the cabinet to get a vase all while complaining about how awful the florists in Monaco are and how they fucked up his order and how one day he will take her to the Netherlands, proper, not just for a race, and show her the tulips fields and then she will get proper flowers and and and and -

And Daniel is just standing by the still open door, staring at him, distantly wondering if she's astronomically fucked up the oven temperatures and this is CO2 poisoning. Max suddenly stills, stopping mid sentence to worry his lip before turning and blurting out "You're not a lesbian, are you?"

And Daniel is so shocked she bursts out laughing and Max's cheeks flood warm and he quickly says that of course it would be fine if she is, he has lots of gay and bi friends and besides, he knows he likes Daniel in a lot of ways and he would be happy having her as a friend because she's his best one and he -

And Daniel takes pitying on him and finally says no Max I'm not a lesbian and Max just sort of nods and looks away, and Daniel finally shuts the door but can't stop staring at him and then she laughing again, but in delight and happiness and joy as she finally realises what he said and what he meant, and then Max is laughing too and she can still feel the smile on his lips when they kiss.

And they have wonderful, pent-up-longing-finally-released make out session in her kitchen and then Daniel's alarm goes off and they spring apart as if they're teenagers caught misbehaving and Daniel looks at Max and Max looks back at her and then she grins and he looks so relieved and smiles back.

"I have wanted to do that for a long time," Max admits softly, cheeks blazing as he helps Daniel cut the brownies into squares. She looks at him but he won't meet her eye and then it somehow comes out in mutters and blushes that he's liked her for literal years, but of course she would not like someone like him, she's too cool and free and extroverted, and he moved on and Daniel just can't believe it (((Max loves her for things which aren't her physical appearance!!!)))) and tells Max he's an idiot and when he looks up at her in surprise, she kisses him.

And then Max tries her brownie and Daniel is weirdly afraid something mightve changed between them now but he takes one bite and makes a face and tells her she has always been a bit of a shit cook but this is astronomically shit and Daniel laughs and playfully shoves him and then tries a piece and can't even pretend to enjoy it. They throw it out and Max orders from their favourite Chinese and then life gets bigger and bigger and Max doesnt care if Daniel dresses smart or casual or shave or wears make up, but the one thing he insists on is she not straighten her hair again because he likes to wind the curls around his fingers and tug softly on then. Daniel somehow smiles even more and her laugh is even louder but she no longer cares, and the shark painting in her living room continues to watch her with bright, black eyes and Max eats all the ice cream left in her freezer that she hasn't been able to touch and each time she thinks she can't get any happier, Max will or complain about her thick hair clogging up the shower drain or ban her from cooking unless he's there to supervise and keep the salt and sugar separate or or or

And it goes on like that, happy and in love :)))

#sorry i warned i had a LOT of thoughts lol #insecure girl Daniel had both my heart and mind though #i had to give her a hair ending #and Max too who also goes through insecurity lol #we do love insecurity in this house #that and internalised misogyny lol #my fic #cheers for reading!#happy ending not hair ending #but as a girl with wild curls i also needed a happy hair ending for Dani too #I'm sorry for all the spelling mistakes this was very much a stream of consciousness #please let me know any other thoughts you have on insecure Dan girl Dan!#like i said #she really is stuck in my head :)))

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