#(if I do “the a...” I get “the archangel” from the opening line of a fic i published 3 years ago lmao)

[justwhumpythings]

Whump prompt:

"This is a mercy compared to what they would do to you."

[vroomvroomwee]

Crowley is Lucifer

(Ok I know some of you don't believe this theory but I highly suggest you give this a quick read anyway. I tried to make it short and easy and I'll be going chronologically, from s1 all through s2)

- First, let's get this out of the way, Lucifer and Satan aren't neccesarilly the same person. Even in the show the devil that appeared in s1 has only ever been reffered to as Satan, not even once as Lucifer.

- In the bible Lucifer was the one to tempt Eve with the apple, and who do we know that does that in the show. Crowley is literally THE snake from Eden.

- An obvious one perhaps, but the red hair is also a giveaway

- In the bible Jesus was tempted by the devil for 30 days, in the show Crowley says "I showed him all the kingdoms of the world", so that's another role Lucifer has that Crowley had in the show

- It's well known (even mentioned in the Sandman) that Lucifer was the most beautiful of all angels, and our demon is played by no other than David Tennant

Now on to season 2 because there's a LOT to unpack here

- He litterally started the engine of the universe which was one of Lucifers roles

- He's the first to say "let there be light", which is pretty fucking huge since that is Gods line

- "I worked closely with upstairs on it" even in the first scene they're telling us Crowley is an angel of very very high rank

- He fell for asking questions, which is litterally what Lucifer fell for, for questioning God. This in and of itself should be a pretty big indicator. "I only ever asked questions"

- Shax: "a miracle of enourmous power only the mightiest of archangels can perform"

Crowley: "How do you know I didn't do it"

And Shax just... doesn't counter that. She looks even skeptical, as if it COULD be a possibility, unlike Uriel who says to Aziraphale don't excpect us to believe you did it. Shax litterally doesn't shut the option down which confirms Crowley has the power not only of an archangel but of the mightiest kind

- In the bookshop with Gabriel/Jim he says "I don't remember. It [gravity] seemed like a good idea when we were all talking about it"

- "You're welcome to come in, you might even spot an archangel" don't tell me this was Crowley just egging Shax on and not being sneaky

- The fact that he could sense the demons coming. "Somethings wrong""It's coming in waves", when Aziraphale couldn't. It could be a demon thing but we saw Sandalphon, an archangel of lower rank, in the first season mention "something smells evil" so obviously angels can sense demons too, they just have to be powerful enough. And keep in mind Sandalphon was already in the book shop for quite some time, Crowley sensed them even before they had arrived (he also sensed the hell hound who was some fucking miles away)

- The.fucking.folder. "You have to be a throne or dominion above" and this dude opens these clasified documents like it's nothing. If this isn't an indicator of his high position as an angel I don't know what is.

- He's worked with Saraqael, another very high ranking angel

- "I'm the only first order archangel in the room"... and the camera imediately pans to Crowley, and for anyone who's read the book and watched the show you know that rarely anything is coincidental

- When the Metatron says they can't lose another prince of heaven. This... this fucking line. So it's relatively well known that Gabriel and Lucifer are brothers, and if Gabriel is one of the princes of heaven I wonder who the other one could be. "Two princes of heaven". And the Metatrons words were very careful, he doesn't say lost as in heaven can't find him, he says it in the context that they won't be sending Gabriel to hell since they won't lose another prince to downstairs

- In the bookshop when no one can identify the Metatron he turns to Crowley who imediately recognises him. Now you have this dude, who's literally on top of the angel hierarchy and is responsible for running heaven and the connection to God themself, surrounded by archangels and a principality you spoke to face to face with just a few years ago and... none of them can tell who you are, the only one who does is the literal demon. That tells us that Crowley has not only seen him in this form, but has probably worked with the Metaron himself personally. "Always asking damn fool questions", 10 million angels and he remembers what this one particular angel was like 6000 years ago

- Crowley is also very reluctant to reveal his identity as an angel. Now if he were just an ordinary angel of no real significance he wouldn't have a problem revealing his name, but... if his name was one that's the literal representation of all evil in this world, then it is understandable he keeps it a secret, in fear he might scare Aziraphale away

- And I wanted to leave the best for last. So you remember in the book when Crowley has to sign his name to start Armaggedon, and Hastur tells him "no, your real name" after which he reluctantly writes it. Now in the book we never see him write anything, but in the show we see him write a sygil, something that looks very mich like an L. An L... A FUCKING L. And now I wonder how this theory didn't come up sooner.

(Also he can fucking stop time, like dafuq)

Edit:

- "Oh looky here it's Lucifer and the guys" we all thought he was talking about someone else, he's just refferencing things other angels have said about HIM. FUCK

- I keep seing people saying Crowleys memories were wiped because he couldn't remember Saraqael and Furfur. But I think people forget, demons lie. He's lying to make them think he's not that angel they worked with, that he's not Lucifer. (In season 1 we hear him a few times refferencing his life as an angel, so he does remember most of it)

- Also saying if the Raphael theory were true then as showrunners they would have mentioned him somewhere for those not that familiar with the bible (or don't read much fanfiction). The refferences for Crowleys past are so so vague that it would be too sudden and confusing if he were Raphael. But there is one name that everyone is familiar with, no matter who you are how old you are or where you're from, a name that needs no introduction.

Edit 2:

- Back to him being the most beautiful angel, I don't think it was ever quite explained how every single demon when they're in hell looks... awful, but Crowley doesn't. Beelzebub has the spores all over their face, Hastur the maggots and the sh-, Dagon the scales etc. But Crowley doesn't, not even when he's in hell, he's always just so, well, pretty.

- I saw a few people asking about how Lucifer started the rebellion and Crowley wouldn't do that. I think it's the same Crowley who wouldn't get stuck in traffic after creating the M25, or the same Crowley that wanted to call Aziraphale after bringing down the entire London network, "you told them you invented the spanish inquisition, and started the second world war""so the humans beat me to it that's not my fault", "so all this is your demonic work?""no, the humans thought it up themselves nothing to do with me"

- Also I think Satan's in charge of hell not Crowley the same way the Metatron's in charge of heaven and not Gabriel (and who can very easily demote angels if he so wishes)

Edit 3:

- like some of you pointed out Lucifer is also known/means Light-bringer. And Crowley was the first to say "let there be light."

- The file he opens with Muriel is Gabriels file, a class A archangel, so if he knows the password to that it means that either he's on the same level as Gabriel, or above him.

[dinoace2]

For @hg-aneh , this comic they made :]

Bit of a different take, this time, what if it wasn't just that he didn't talk, but he couldn't?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was a shitty day.

All the days had been shitty.

Aziraphale had lost count how many there had been so far, and rain doesn't exist in Heaven. But clouds massing over Soho suggested that the newest thunderstorm was on its way, and it was going to be a big one.

Earlier...

"No, no, please, you can't do this!" Aziraphale thrashed about, trying to loose the grip of the Powers who held onto each of his arms. One on either side, holding tight to ensure he couldn't move.

Uriel sneered at him, their eyes flaring with anger. "I already told you once, Aziraphale. You ask too many questions. Supreme Archangel or not, there still remain standards that must be met. Lines that cannot be crossed."

Aziraphale frowned. "It still seems quite reasonable to me to demand why! The very idea of creating Humanity, just to destroy it, it's...well, it's senseless! Sure, they've made mistakes, but they don't deserve utter annihilation for it! And they definitely don't deserve it if the only reason is 'the Almighty has grown bored of Her little social experiment'! That logic is, quite frankly, nothing short of childish and ridic- !"

One of the other angels cut him off with a knee to the stomach. He winced, letting out a huff of air as he sank to his knees.

"Thats enough!" Michael frowned. "I'm not sure what the Metatron saw in you before, but I'm glad He finally came to His senses." She leaned down, inches from his face. "I've half a mind to strike you down where you stand, traitor."

"S-surely," Aziraphale whispered, his voice hoarse. "Surely, this can't be what She wants. This can't be Her will."

“You don't have the right to suggest what She wants.” Michael scowled. “such blasphemy begs execution.”

“I think you and I both know what happened the last time you tried.” Aziraphale managed a smirk. 

“We're well aware, thank you.” She huffed. “we had to get creative this time around, I hate to say.” She waved a hand. “Uriel!”

She stepped aside as the other archangel approached, some sort of weapon in hand. They raised their arm to strike, and Aziraphale flinched, his eyes shut tight.

…

He paused. Wasn't something supposed to happen? He opened his eyes, only to find Uriel already putting their weapon away. 

What happ- he paused. His mouth had opened, his lips formed the words, but…he didn't say anything. No sound came out.

He tried again, getting the same result. Michael chuckled. “A fitting consequence for the angel who talked too much, no?” she waved to the angels on either side of him. “You know what to do.”

Aziraphale struggled in their grasp as they dragged him away, far past the point of no return.

~~~

It burns...

It's so cold, but it burns...

Aziraphale wasn't sure how long he'd been falling.

He felt infernal wind flying around him, whipping in his hair and tearing through his feathers. It was completely dark, he couldn't see anything. The only reason he knew which way was down was because thats the direction he was going.

Hellfire lashed at him as he Fell, flicking at his clothes, his skin, his wings.  Every burst of flame stung with a flash of icy, searing pain that burned deep into his soul.

He wanted to cry out, to scream, to call for something, anything, but when his mouth opened he was still trapped in the same empty, maddening silence as if he had done nothing at all.

He wondered if this was how Crowley felt when he Fell; freezing, burning, hurting...alone. Thinking through everything that led him here. Wondering if he did the right thing. Wondering if there was anything else he should have done, anything else he could have done, to possibly have changed what he now faced.

Crowley...

What would he say, when he saw Aziraphale like this? What would he do? Would he even do anything? Would he glare down at him? Say 'I told you so'? Grin and laugh? Or maybe he'd just walk away, not even dignifying a response. Aziraphale wouldn't even blame him for that, considering how he left things. Whatever Crowley decided to do, it was definitely going to be deserved.

He put a hand to his throat, realizing that, whatever happened, he wouldn't be able to say anything. Wouldn't be able to explain himself, or say anything that he wanted to, or... he paused, then hugged himself. For the rest of eternity, no matter how much he may want to, no matter how hard he'd try, he would never be able to tell Crowley those three bloody words that he'd always wanted to say. Those three blasted words that had been on the tip of his tongue for millenia. Those three damned words that he should have said before.

But...even if he said them now...there was no guarantee (or, at this point, no chance) that Crowley would accept it, surely. Not after everything he did...after everything that happened.

  He hugged himself, pulling his knees to his chest, and choked on a silent sob. Everything hurt, he felt confused and scared and ruined. All he felt he could do was fall, and wait for the crash.

~~~

Aziraphale's eyes opened. He didn't know where he was. He didn't know what he was. He felt nothing at all. But at the same time he felt everything…and it all hurt. His lungs burned and his eyes stung. A cloud of ash lingered around him, smothering the nearby air and nearly making him choke.

He wanted to curl up, to cry, to never move again. He felt like he couldn't move, yet still that he had to. His face hardly moved, his expression limp and exhausted and miserable. In all fairness, that's exactly how he felt. Nothing. 

He gathered what strength he had and pulled himself to sit up, looking around. His skin stung with burns and his eyes couldn't quite focus. His fingers curled in coarse, sharp, black sand beneath him, and waves lapped at his feet. A burnt smell came from the bubbling ‘water’. Sulfur…? It looked like some sort of…infernal beach.

He got to his feet, brushing the sand off his coat and beginning to walk. Hell's offices must not be far from here.

Sure enough, after walking for a while he made it to a dim-lit building, greenish light spilling out of the few windows. Heaven's basement, indeed.

When Aziraphale opened the doors, all went suddenly still and silent. All eyes fell on him. The cramped crowds parted as he walked past, perhaps out of recognition, perhaps out of fear. He stopped one demon on his way, asking for directions by simply pointing a finger up.

~~~

The clouds overhead were dense and dark, nearly blotting out the natural sunlight of the late afternoon. Thunder rolled in the distance, deep and low, a promise of the storm that was to come.

A distinct ding echoed in the empty Soho street corner, and a cloud of ash spilled out onto the sidewalk.

As if to gather what dignity he had left, Aziraphale straightened his coat, straightening the wrinkles in the fabric, and approached A.Z. Fell and Co. The first raindrops of the oncoming tempest splashed against the pavement.

He hesitated as he reached for the door. The bookshop was an embassy after all. Demons aren't allowed to pass without permission...would he even be able to go inside his own- well...not his anymore - home? His fingers clasped around the doorknob and gently turned it, breathing out a sigh of relief when nothing stopped him.

The familiar chime of the doorbell was almost comforting as he stepped inside, but relief was quick to be replaced by regret.

It was dark. The lights were all out, the shades all drawn. The shop looked untouched, and while ordinarily that would be a good thing, not like this. Everything was covered in a visible layer of dust. He swiped his finger on the till counter, carving a revealed line of clean wood beneath the soft gray film. Not just untouched, but abandoned.

You poor thing...wasn't Muriel supposed to look after you?

Among the stagnant, silent scenery, a mop of long red hair was draped across a table. The body slumped beneath it stirred at the sound of the doorbell. Golden eyes blinked slowly, adjusting to the shift in lighting.

Aziraphale stood still, saying nothing, doing nothing. What happened to you? How long was I gone? How long have you been alone? His mind raced with questions that he couldn't voice.

Once he noticed the figure in front of him, Crowley was quick to sit upright, eyes wide. "Oh..." Frantic emotions of all natures flashed across his expression as he tried to determine whether the sight before him was really and truly there.

"Oh!"

He got to his feet, crossing his arms over his chest. "Well! Look who bothered to show up!" A sharp grin took over his face as he sauntered up to the visitor. "The Supreme Asshat of Heaven, dirtying his clean little shoes to come and laugh  at the pitiful, sad demon." His voice came out as a hiss, laced with bitter sarcasm and poorly-disguised sadness. Aziraphale didn't move, didn't respond. He couldn't.

I'm so sorry, dear…is that what you think ive been feeling? What I've been up to? Why would I ever mock you, I could never-

Crowley put his hands up and spoke in a mocking tone. “‘Ooh, poor Crowley, he must be feeling so pathetic, all alone’.” He grinned wider, his arms flat at his sides. “Well. The joke's on you. I'm better than ever on my own. Just me. A team of Myself.” He stepped forward once more, blinking away tears. “I don't need you!”

Aziraphale just looked at him, part of his mind wondering if this new form could cry.

Inches away from his face, Crowley nearly shouted, “So tell me, Angel, why did you come back?! Why are you here, Aziraphale?!”

With a shaky breath and a whoosh of feathers, Aziraphale answered his question. It…seemed the easiest way to communicate, considering the circumstances. Thunder cracked outside, a flash of light through the windows highlighting the jet-black wings from behind. He could do nothing but watch, as the color drained from Crowley's face.

“You….you-” he was still for a moment, quiet and shaky. His anger seemed to shift, still present but no longer directed at Aziraphale. “You idiot!” He launched forward and grabbed Aziraphale by his jacket’s lapels. “Why, Aziraphale?! Why did you leave?! Why did you go back?! Why?” He finally choked on a sob, collapsing against Aziraphale's chest. “Why, Angel…why…why…” He dissolved into broken cries, sinking to his knees as he begged for answers.

Oh, Crowley…

They sat in silence for a long while, Aziraphale unsure of what to do. He certainly couldn't say anything.

When Crowley's sobs slowed to soft whimpers, the angel stepped back. Crowley looked up at him, confusion in his gaze.

Aziraphale took a breath, then recited the simple, memorized steps in his head. Stepped forward with one hand up and the other on his hip, kicked his leg back and lifted his arms, spun around on one foot, and ended in a bow. You were right, you were right, I was wrong, you were right. He sunk down on the bow, propping himself on one knee and keeping his head low.

Crowley was silent, his jaw slack as he processed what just happened. 

“...Angel-”

He reached up, gently holding Aziraphale's cheek with one hand. Aziraphale closed his eyes, leaning into the demon's touch.

“...say something…please…” He whispered, leaning closer.

‘I can't,’ Aziraphale mouthed, trying to gesture to his neck. ‘I'm sorry.’

Crowley paused, nodding slightly. He seemed to understand. He pulled him close, pressing their foreheads together. “...Heaven took it from you…didn't they.” It was more of a statement than a question. When Aziraphale nodded, he sighed. “Those angels and their ‘poetic justice’, huh? They…they think they have the right to take everything…I get it. I've been there. Though I'm sure you know that already, heh.” He smiled weakly, and he felt a silent chuckle shake in Aziraphale's chest.

“...im glad you came back,” Crowley whispered. “I…im sorry how I acted…what I said, when you left…a-and…the…the kiss, i…im so sorry…I wish it had happened under better circumstances…or…maybe even just…never at all, I…I just…you…” his rambling trailed off, as Aziraphale cupped his face in both hands, gently lifting his chin.

The little space between them closed, their lips falling together as both demons desperately clung to one another, their only lifeline in an otherwise empty world. This wasn't like the last one. The last one was a plea to stay…this one was a promise. 

Tears finally fell down Aziraphale's cheeks, stinging his skin as he pulled Crowley closer still. He pressed kisses to his lips, his cheek, along his jaw, anywhere he could reach. He mouthed what he couldn't say against Crowley's skin, three words over and over, whispered silently wherever he touched. I love you, I love you, I love you.

Crowley pulled away, if only to breathe for a moment. “Aziraphale…” He wiped at the tears on his cheeks with his thumbs.

He hugged him, pulling him into a tight embrace. “my offer still stands, you know…our side…together. Just us…if- if you're interested, I mean. I…I know, it…sounds lonely…but…nothin’ wrong with being lonely together, is there?” He offered a weak smile. 

Aziraphale smiled, a real, true smile for the first time since getting on that bloody elevator oh-so-long ago, nodding as he clung tightly to his other half.

Together. Our side. As long as we have each other.

~~~~~~~~~

Thanks for reading! :]

[melbatron5000]

The Big Damn Kiss

Buckle up, my fellow Good Omens Ineffable Mystery Puzzlers, Crackpotters, and Assorted Brainrotters, because I learned something HUGE yesterday.

This will be a bit of a long post, because I want to show you exactly how I got where I am. I want you to understand. I want to put all the naysayers to bed (ha! But I'm still gonna try), and settle this once and for all.

I know (almost) exactly what Crowley gave to Aziraphale during the kiss.

DO NOT TAKE ANY OF MY THEORIES TO NEIL! PLEASE!

Okay? Okay. Thanks. Shall we begin?

Ahem.

Firstly, whether you believe me or not, I am 100% certain that Crowley did, indeed, give something to Aziraphale in his mouth during The Kiss. I've covered that in the link previous. Okay? Okay.

I did not know what it was. I've now heard theories that it was a bullet (nope), a ball bearing (nope), hellfire (nope), and no one, NO ONE has suggested what I see. (If you have, hello! Talk to me!)

Here's our first foreshadowing Clue:

And here's our next foreshadowing Clue:

And the next:

And our last Clue:

With me so far? Well, that first GIF is a bit off, I couldn't find one of Crowley actually spitting out the flies. But he does. When Beelzebub first drags him to Hell, he actually goes "Pleaugh!" and spits out four or five flies. Edit: Found it!

Moving right along, we come to Crowley in Heaven with Muriel, looking at the trial. We learn two important things here:

One, Gabriel doesn't have a desk.

Two, Muriel does. Where they keep the records. And it's a bit lonely. Every few hundred years, someone comes and asks for something. Muriel can't access the sensitive ones, you have to be pretty high up. A throne, dominion, or higher. Like, maybe Supreme Archangel?

So if Gabriel doesn't have a desk, whose desk is he at when he's getting ready to leave Heaven? Of course I can't find a damn picture of Gabriel at the desk, but it's Muriel's. Where they keep the RECORDS.

Gabriel puts his memory into the fly, then gets on the elevator to go to Earth.

Now, when Gabriel opens the fly with his memories inside, we find out that it's a container. Bigger on the inside. You can put thing(S) in it. The bit we see of him remembering is shot in two parts, one where he's flying down a red tunnel, one where he's flying down a blue. If you slow this scene down and watch, you can see that he is NOT looking at just his own memories. There is more going on here, more that he was not present for. @embracing-the-ineffable put up a great meta about that here. Go look!

Now I figured Gabriel must have taken something else. Something important. Something useful. Something he meant to give to Aziraphale, except he forgot.

I also figured he must have left whatever it was in the fly when he took his memories out. Crowley must have realized while watching the trial footage that Gabriel also grabbed something else. I don't know when Crowley grabs the fly, but he does. And that is what he gives to Aziraphale in the kiss. Why? Well.

I had no idea what Gabriel took until I started working on the chiastic structure of season 2. I'm not done with that analysis yet, but let me show you one thing that I have found so far:

(The numbers are just to try and help me navigate the story and its events without time stamps)

My note #357 of what happens isn't quite right, but when I saw the only two times Aziraphale says "I forgive you" are towards the beginning of Season 2 and towards the end, I realized I had something.

Rephrase line 357: Crowley's kiss is forgiven IN EXCHANGE FOR RECORDS.

(Not that I think Crowley's kiss needs to be forgiven. It's just what Aziraphale says, and had to say at that moment, because the Metatron was listening in.)

What does Heaven in Good Omens remind us of most of all?

A big corporate entity. And what do powerful people do when they get fired from a big corporate entity? They download all their emails while they're cleaning out their desks. Damning emails. Emails that can be used to black mail or even destroy big corporate entities. Or, ya know, maybe they swipe some sensitive RECORDS?

Oh yes.

Records that Gabriel meant to give to Aziraphale, but he forgot. Records that Crowley realized Gabriel had put in the fly. The fly that Crowley grabbed once Gabriel had his memory out. The fly that he gave to Aziraphale when he kissed him. The fly that no longer held Gabriel's memory, but did still contain those damning records.

Here's Aziraphale reading the records:

Here's Aziraphale being horrified and outraged by what he's reading:

And here's Aziraphale realizing he has got some GOOD DIRT on Heaven. Maybe enough to bring them down:

That's it folks. I have no idea what the records actually say, and maybe we're not meant to know until season 3, but whatever it is, it's GOOD.

That's my story, and by God Herself, I'm sticking to it.

[bullet-prooflove]

Ten Years: Dean Winchester x Reader

Tagging: @kmc1989 @gatefleet @deanobssessedgirl @cosmic-psychickitty @cinderellasmissingshoes

Companion piece to:

Gatlinburg - Dean falls in love in a tiny town in Tennessee.

With You - Dean tells you he's going to stay the night.

You, Me & Tennessee - Dean always returns to Tennessee.

On The Mountain - Dean wishes he was back on the Mountain with you.

Feral (NSFW) - Dean gets feral when he sees you with another man.

Six Pack (NSFW) - You realise the man waiting for you isn't Dean Winchester.

Memories (NSFW) - Michael invades your home whilst you're away.

Sweet Dreams - Dean thinks about how this all started.

Deals With the Devil (feat: Michael)- You wake up with an angel in your bed.

The night that Michael shows up in your bed, is the night you end up at the Fire Tower indefinitely. Your supervisor is happy for the help because things on the mountain they’ve gotten a little wilder recently and you know that’s a reaction to the archangel that’s currently residing in your home.

Michael’s presence is fucking with the eco system, tipping the careful balance that you and the other forest rangers have spent years trying to maintain because the mountain doesn’t like it when others encroach on its territory. The spirit is old, dawn of time kind of old. The magic that guards the National Park it’s ancient, primordial, and it’s the only thing that’s keeping Michael away from you because even archangels know better than to fuck with Gaia.

You check your phone for the millionth time before you settle yourself into the metal single bed. Every ranger that stays in the tower tries to make it home for their rotation. You flick on the fairy lights that hang around the edge of the window as you tug the grey fleece lined blanket up to your chest. Dean brought it back to you after one of his trips because he knows it gets cold up here on the mountain.

You’ve been trying to call Sam since you found the archangel in your bed but it goes straight to voicemail. You turn it off and set it on the crate you use as a nightstand before you snuggle down into the blanket. The scent of Dean’s aftershave still clings to it from the last time the two of you were up here, making love to the sound of rain pattering against the windows.

As you lie there, your eyes fixed on the lights your mind drifts to Michael’s offer.

“All I’m asking for is one night.” He had whispered against your skin. “One night where I get to feel what he feels, that I get to experience you, enjoy you. You can have him back after that, you can be with the man you love again. Don’t you want that?”

You want that more than anything but the cost, it’s just too great because Dean will never forgive himself, it would torture him to the end of his days and you can’t do that to the man you love.

During your second night on the mountain, you ignite the firepit in the clearing at the base of the tower before setting up two camping chairs, close to the flames. You snap off the bottle caps off two IPAs from the microbrewery in town before placing one in the cupholder of the spare chair.

It doesn’t take long for your guest to join you. It never does once you’ve cracked open that first beer and this brand Mountain Brew, it’s his favourite. You hear the wind rustling through the trees before Guy steps out into the clearing, his hands tucked into the pockets of the black aviator jacket. He wears worn Levis and a threadbare navy blue Airforce cap on top of a thick head of white hair. He’s been this way ever since the day your father first brought you here at the age of eight to meet the spirit of the mountain. The rangers in this region are all legacy families, it’s in your blood to protect the people here from the things that go bump in the night.

“I’m gonna be here for a while.” You find yourself telling him as you stare into the fire. “Things out there…”

You trail off because you aren’t sure how to explain what’s happening in the outside world.

“It’s your hunter isn’t it?” He says as he drops into the empty chair beside you, picking up the IPA. “Somethings happened to him.”

The spirit of the mountain, it likes Dean. It has since that nightmare with the Wendigos. His affection for you, the fact that he cleans up after himself and deals with the shit that needs to be dealt with in, all of that has endeared him to Guy.

“The two of you make a good match.” Guy had told him one night when the three of you were roasting smores. “I couldn’t have picked a better mate for a daughter of the mountain.”

“What does he mean by that?” Dean had asked you later, his head propped up on his arm as he watches you undress from his position in the bed. “Daughter of the forest?”

You’d explained your heritage then, how the rangers in this town were descended from Gaia, how every single one of you was connected to this forest in some way which is why you protect it.

“And now you know everything.” You had told him as you lingered at the side of the bed, wearing one of his t-shirts. “Does it change anything for you?”

“Nah, I knew you were special.” He’d told you as he caught your hand, pulling you down on top him before he gathers you up in his arms. “A little bummed out that you’re not one of the X-Men though.”

“Yea it sucks.” You’d said as you buried your face into the crook of his neck. “No powers, just a shotgun and a ranger’s uniform.”

“You do look hot with a shotgun though.” He’d reminded you, his fingertips combing lightly through your hair. “And in uniform.”

Over beers in the present you tell Guy about the situation with Dean and with Michael. He listens diligently and without judgement, his expression remaining impassive throughout.

“There’s a way.” He says after a few minutes of silence. “But it’ll require some sacrifice on your part.”

“Anything.” You say resolutely and he sets his empty beer bottle down alongside the others.

“I can make a weapon.” He confides in you, his thumb peeling at label on the bottle.  “Something that can kill Michael, that will leave the hunter intact.”

“What’s the catch?” You ask and he inclines his head towards you, his lips pursed together grimly.

“Ten years.” He says and you frown because you don’t understand the meaning behind his words. “Crafting something like that, something that can kill an archangel it takes a lot of power, power I’m currently using to lock down some of the bigger grizzles that wander these parts.”

He means the monsters that he keeps caged, the ones that would tear apart the region if he didn’t keep a firm grasp on them. You deal with the small stuff, the ones that pick off campers and steal small children but anything bigger than that..

Well let’s just say you’d all be fucked.

“If I create this weapon it’ll leave me weak, things will start to slip and …”

The sentence hangs in the air and you know exactly where this is going.

“You’ll need to draw energy from me to stop that from happening and the only way you can do that is if I’m here on the mountain.” You sigh as he gives you that look, the one you’ve come to know so well.

“It takes ten years to replenish that kind of expenditure.” He explains, setting out the parameters. “That means you won’t be able to cross the boundary where the National Park ends. You’ll have to give up your freedom, your home, the life you have...”

It means that you’ll be stranded here like Rapunzel in the Fire Tower, on an indefinite watch for the next decade. The alternative doesn’t seem much better because as long as Michael’s out there, you can’t leave the shelter of the mountain anyway without putting yourself in danger. That archangel, he’s going to snap soon and it’s going to be violent and bloody when he does.

At least this way Dean will be free, he won’t be trapped in his own mind, screaming and clawing at the walls.

“Ten years.” You say quietly before you take a sip of your beer. “I can do ten years.”

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Like My Work? - Why Not Buy Me A Coffee

[drconstellation]

First-Order Archangels

Part 1: Maybe You'll Spot An Archangel

GABRIEL: I told you you could ask. However, I am the only First-Order archangel in the room, or, you know, the Universe, so I'm not gonna answer so much. But you feel free to knock yourself out with all the asking.

While I was writing my meta series The Passion Of Jimbriel it became fairly obvious to me there was something more going on between Crowley and Gabriel in S2 than just the numerous pointers to Crowley's pre-fall angel status. They are acting as both parallels and foils to each other, and in places you can swap their characters and get the same story at a different time – and that just opens up a whole new window of context and insight into things. For pre-reading, see this meta from @vidavalor that nicely lists some obvious parallels. It doesn’t mention everything though, so I’m going to discuss parts in more detail.

A foil is a character who contrasts with the protagonist, to highlight or differentiate certain qualities between the characters. Crowley and Gabriel do this because they have come from essentially the same place, and share some story elements, but they still end up in different places.

There is a lengthy original discussion about Crowley's pre-fall angel status here, for pre-reading. It points out the obvious and some not so obvious points that ops have noticed in S2 telling us about Crowley's pre-fall status. Rather than just go through them all again, I'd like to look at some other scenes in S2 that also tell us something about both the similarities and the differences between these two high-powered entities as I go along. In addition, I’ve done a series of posts looking at Gabriel as a shoulder angel (links at the end of post,) because quite often he’s on the demonic left-hand side – which makes sense when you realize he’s a Crowley parallel.

Take the arrival of Gabriel to Whickber St and the bookshop. I’ve already mentioned this parallel story line a couple of times now, but lets look at it again in more detail. It mirrors the opening of S1E1 where the serpent climbs the wall of the Garden of Eden, morphs into a demon and starts to converse with the angel standing on the wall.

Back in the present day, we have a Gabriel, who also tends to present on the sinister-side, walking up to the gate of the present day Garden (the bookshop), which is still guarded by the same angel as it was 6000 years ago, and basically tells Aziraphale he has “fallen.”

How to we know this? It is a reference to the Fall of Man, when Adam and Eve ate the apple the serpent offered them, they suddenly became aware of their nakedness, and hid from God. Gabriel has already upset the love-apple tomato cart on his way to the door of the bookshop, its a sign of the chaos to come.

The fallen angel is not sure of his name, so he prompts with a question…

And asks for shelter under the (reluctant) angel’s wing..

But there is one thing he does know, the one thing that drew him to Aziraphale in the first place:

AZIRAPHALE: Then why did you come to my shop? GABRIEL: I don't know. I just thought I should. You know what it's like when you- when you don't know anything at all, and yet you're totally certain that everything would be better if you were just near one particular person?

Later, Aziraphale realizes that he must give Gabriel a new name to hide him – because fallen angels take on a new name, don’t they? Just like Crowley did.

Then we get a confession:

Which is what Crowley loves about Aziraphale as well - that bit of unpredictability, because you know how humour kind of works? It throws the unexpected at you.

Early on in S2 we find out they are both in trouble: first His Royal Smugness, then Our Hero himself. Our view is turned upside down, with the angel made the bad guy and the demon the good guy who needs to win. But both of them are being hunted by Shax.

Then we get one of the early clues pointing to Crowley's high status as an angel:

SHAX: A miracle of enormous power happened last night. The kind of miracle only the mightiest of Archangels could've performed. CROWLEY: Mm? SHAX: Somewhere very close to your friend's bookshop. Are you telling me you don't know what caused it? CROWLEY: How'd you know I didn't do it?

Shax stalks and threatens both of them, sometimes at the same time:

Another parallel Gabriel and Crowley shared in S2 were associating their identity - no, lets rephrase that - "essence" was one description I've seen - with boxes.

Gabriel arrives with a box that strategically covers his front, and quickly tosses it aside once Aziraphale opens the door to the bookshop. It lies forgotten until Gabriel mentions it a while later. Inside it is the fly from Beelzebub - an object from Hell - so it really needs to be 'invited' across the threshold of the bookshop by Aziraphale to be able to enter. The box initially appears to be empty, Once inside, the fly is free to roam. It has a message written on one side of it.

The same goes for the matchbox. Message included.

ah, wot? you say. Yep.

The matchbox represents Crowley, probably in more ways than one, but I'll just go through the stuff relevant to this meta here.

I notice I'm not the only op to connect the line from the Book of Job on the side of the matchbox with Crowley. The line is from Verse 41, which talks about Leviathan. Among the various shapes it is described to take is a great sea serpent. This deserves its own meta for further discussion, which I plan to do after this one, because yes, Crowley is Leviathan in disguise, but there is much more to it than that. But for now, just know that the matchbox is Crowley.

Once you know this, it makes sense that Muriel finds it - a discarded cardboard box by the front door to Heaven - and deals with a material object that shouldn't by rights exist in Heaven. Then a certain demon finds Muriel lurking outside during the siege on the bookshop at the end of S2E5, and talks them into letting the certain demon be escorted up into Heaven where he doesn't belong, where he's free to roam around - only he needs a guide because he's not sure where to go. Ah Muriel, you poke the Serpent, he's going to poke you back. Good thing he likes you, and it just was a gentle nudge.

Two empty boxes, two cases of memory-loss. That is what S2 seems to suggest to us at first glance.

Gabriel's seems to be the most straight forward in hindsight - find the fly and restore Gabriel to his original "Gabriel-ness." But its more complicated than that. When pushed to remember, his lilac eyes return and another voice can be heard speaking through him of the past. This happens twice, with the second one being part-prophecy. What is really triggering these episodes of channeling? Is it God or someone else speaking through him? We really aren't sure at this point in time.

Then there are questions around Crowley's memory. Did he have his memory wiped when he fell? Was it wiped repeatedly? Was it not wiped at all, and he just pretends he doesn't remember? Neil has even said he is an unreliable narrator about his own Fall, so who are we to trust at this point? Crowley does seem to understand in the end some of the problems Gabriel is having with his absent memories and that brings them to a temporary truce.

Both Aziraphale and Michael inspect their respective "empty" boxes, and neither notices anything obviously amiss. Gabriel's box just seems empty to Aziraphale, he takes no notice of the fly container in there, and archangel Michael tentatively inspects the matchbox brought to them by Muriel but nothing seems out of place there either.

Crowley's change in costume in Heaven during his little infiltration caper with Muriel is also another clue to his past status as an archangel. He has a silvery-gray suit, similar in style to Saraqael's to reinforce the link with them, but at the same time he is also mocking the other archangels and their elite status. We've assumed for a while now that the appearance of the tactical turtleneck signals that Crowley is up to something sneaky or spy related, but I'm starting to think it also relates to a bit of a power play (and Crowley certainly laid the power on for Mr Brown in the pub!) Looking back at S1, Gabriel's not adverse to wearing one either when he needs to be at his worst (or best. Your choice.)

The way one dresses is a way of expressing and reinforcing authority, and its something both Gabriel and Crowley do without much thought. They have been used to being in a position of power and/or independent authority for much of their existence, and I would say that even if Crowley is a few steps down now from where he started, and he's more cautious around those higher ranking than him than he used to be, he still retains that knowledge of what its like to be at the top.

Crowley's usual near all-black costume is a form of power dressing in itself. Whether is was in the past, when black was an expensive color to buy and maintain in clothing, or in the present day, we are still respectful of those in a stylish cut of black.

Gabriel's impeccable tailoring as Supreme Archangel also commands respect. So it's no wonder that one of Gabriel's first requests on regaining his memories was to ask for new clothes! He wasn't just being the vain archangel we believe him to be (although, I think there is still some of that) you also need to consider the elements of the reference characters that went into his shop assistant character: Granville, the belittled shop assistant nephew from the sitcom Open All Hours, who got stuck with all the shop duties from his uncle and felt like life was passing him by, and the silly Monty Python gumbies, that complained of hurting brains - lovable and much loved characters, but not ones you'd really want to be forever. We all want to be loved, but we want to be respected as well.

For all his fierce posturing around Gabriel, there is a brief moment in S2E3 where Crowley backs down and treats Gabriel as an equal - and that is reflected in a change of dress as well. His outside jacket off and sleeve-garters on, Crowley sports a look we haven't seen since S1 when he was home alone in his Mayfair flat. He patiently explains gravity to a curious Gabriel and then describes his "Operation Lovebirds" plan to his puzzled companion. He admits he hasn't "done weather in ages." It's just a quiet, charming moment, watching two ex-archangels get along together.

You're smiling, aren't you?

This meta continues in Part 2: Foils of War, where the differences between Gabriel and Crowley get explored in more detail, and how Aziraphale and Beelzebub act as mirrors to each other a few times as well.

This meta is part of a series on Gabriel: Gabriel as a Shoulder Angel: S1 Study S2 Study Part 1: Ep.1 The Arrival and Ep. 2 The Clue S2 Study Part 2: Ep.3 I Know Where I'm Going and Ep. 5 The Ball S2 Study Part 3: Ep.6 Every Day

First-Order Archangels Part 2: Foils of War

First-Order Archangels Part 3: Seeing Eye to Eye

[borntolurk]

OKAY SO I have a theory about the Aziraphale/Crowley relationship progression but it is going to have some pretty significant SPOILERS for E1-2 of Good Omens S2 so be warned!

By significant spoilers I mean that I will be describing some specific moments across both episodes (which I saw at the NYC screening).

Theory is below the line-

Alright, so as most people already know- I think from an interview- in the opening scene where Crowley and Aziraphale are both angels, Aziraphale notices Crowley before Crowley notices Aziraphale, and Aziraphale is clearly struck by Crowley. I don't know that I'd say "in love" but I think that it's somewhere in a range from "admiring" to "infatuated."

There are a lot of people theorizing about how that could possibly mesh with the S1 truism that Crowley fell fast for Aziraphale and Aziraphale kind of ignored him but I actually think it works perfectly well if you look at it this way:

Aziraphale fell for (for lack of a better term lol) the angel Crowley had been before.

So when he’d have seen Crowley in Eden, Crowley would recognize him as he looks exactly the same and really it's only been seven days, but Aziraphale would see a demon who COULDN’T POSSIBLY BE THE SAME BEING HE FELL FOR!

On rewatching the Eden scene, I think that Aziraphale does recognize Crowley as the angel who fell- he just doesn’t know his new name- and while obviously this is basically just me projecting back on performances that didn’t have ANY of this in mind, he seems very on edge when talking to Crowley. It’s like he knows EXACTLY what led Crowley to fall (asking questions and criticizing God), Crowley’s doing more of it now, seemingly to tempt Aziraphale into falling (especially now that he’s a demon and that’s what demons do, it’s what Crowley just did to Eve), and so Aziraphale is trying to be very careful. It’s why Aziraphale is so freaked out when Crowley points out that maybe he shouldn’t have given away the flaming sword, and that it wouldn’t be good if actually Aziraphale did do the bad thing and Crowley did the good.

Aziraphale needs to have done the good thing so that he doesn't fall and end up like Crowley, the angel who he fell for (figuratively....) and who has met this fate and turned into a totally different being! He’s seen exactly what happens when you’re a powerful and well meaning angel who just has some questions about god’s plans! I believe strongly that Aziraphale had believed that Crowley AS AN ANGEL was good and worth falling in love with, but that Crowley AS A DEMON is a different being who cannot be seen in the same way.

Then at the ark, its Aziraphale’s side that is doing the atrocity so it’s the typical defensiveness, continuing with the whole “well he’s a demon and even if I kind of agree with him he can’t be GOOD the way he was when he was an angel, and that means he must be bad and wrong even if his points make sense.” Crowley is a demon now, and demons are bad, even when they FEEL right- and if Aziraphale goes after his natural inclination which agrees with Crowley, especially if part of that is because he remembers what he felt about that angel of years ago, it just means that he's being tempted by a demon...

AND THEN we get to the Job minisode. I loved the minisode and so I'm hesitant to really spoil it but basically Crowley yo yos back and forth- first he seems very happy to do terrible things to Job, then it turns out he's been partially defying that order (which incidentally means going against God's plan, which is a VERY big problem for Aziraphale!), then he concocts a plan that requires Aziraphale, for good reason, to lie to the other angels, including some archangels, thereby counteracting God's plan. Afterward Aziraphale freaks out because he thinks that lying in order to trick Heaven and God means he’s fallen, and Crowley has to explain that that’s not how it works and comforts him.

Aziraphale is conflicted, of course, because Crowley is confusing and can't really win- on the one hand, it's bad if Crowley listens to God and kills Job's kids, but on the other hand it's bad if Crowley DOESN'T listen to God and DOESN'T kill Job's kids! So Aziraphale is expecting much more than Crowley is ever able to live up to- he's muddled about his purpose, and Aziraphale doesn't know how to interpret that.

I feel like this would kind of put the tin lid on it. Crowley is a different being now, one who may still have merciful qualities that Aziraphale likes and agrees with (and may remind Aziraphale of that angel of long ago) but is still a demon and against everything that Aziraphale is meant to stand for. And while the minisode ends with Aziraphale understanding that he's not quite like the other angels, he is still very clear- he is an angel and Crowley is a demon. They aren't just enemies, they are incompatible. The Crowley in front of him and the Crowley (or whatever his name was) that he remembers from heaven are different and he can't trust the one in front of him.

Because it feels like that's the main barrier here- Aziraphale can't trust Crowley. Crowley is a demon and his object is to tempt humanity to its downfall, even if Crowley himself isn't always so into that. Aziraphale may like Crowley, but it's against his better judgment- every bone in his body tells him not to trust him. He can't trust that Crowley's intentions are genuine- also in the minisode, Crowley tempts Aziraphale to try food (or as Gabriel would call it "gross matter") for the first time, and Aziraphale is somewhat disturbed by this in part because he knows that he is susceptible to Crowley's temptations! How can he trust after this that anything that Crowley does for him or says to him is done with good intentions rather than to bring him down from where he thinks he should be?

It's the Arrangement that ends up changing this. Having an agreement where they each do things for each other, each against their own better judgment, slowly but surely encourages Aziraphale to trust Crowley and his intentions. And it's during the Blitz, when Crowley puts himself in danger to help Aziraphale (danger that is specifically caused by the fact that Crowley IS a demon- otherwise the church would hold no danger), that Aziraphale really realizes that Crowley does have good intentions. He put himself at risk, which is the furthest thing from trying to get something for himself. This allows Aziraphale to trust Crowley that he really does need the holy water for a good reason, among other things later.

As you can tell, I don't actually think that Aziraphale has ever been oblivious to Crowley. He sees everything, but interprets it through his own mental lens. (The parallel that came to mind for me, weirdly, and you can ignore this if you've never seen the sitcom Frasier, but Daphne would have to be wearing massive blinkers not to know that Niles is into her- it's just that she doesn't recognize what kind of feelings he has because in her mind they are in two different worlds and so the idea that he could be genuinely interested is out of her comprehension.) To Aziraphale, Crowley is intriguing and kind and he's thought so since the beginning, but he's also dangerous. In fact that's what makes him dangerous!

Crowley is dangerous because there is so much about him to love, but he is a demon and therefore, in Aziraphale's worldview, unlovable. A demon can't love and be loved! And so Aziraphale is really also not just not trusting Crowley, but also not trusting HIMSELF. He has all these feelings about Crowley but he keeps saying that they're just Crowley tempting him or just residual feelings from the version of Crowley it WAS permissible to love, the angelic one.

I think that Crowley may genuinely be oblivious to anything Aziraphale is feeling, because in the opening scene he isn’t paying a tremendous amount of attention to Aziraphale, but I think he does grasp that Aziraphale doesn’t trust him and that’s what he’s working to change. He knows it's an uphill battle and the most important thing to do in order not just to change their relationship but to get Aziraphale out of his funk.

Now that they're both "on their own side," Aziraphale has a lot more understanding. He sees that just because Crowley is a demon it doesn't mean he is untrustworthy, and he realizes that each of them independently needs to make themselves worthy of trust and Crowley has done that again and again. And so it's almost natural for him to go back to those feelings that he had for that original angelic Crowley, but reinforced by everything he's learned since then- millennia of Crowley proving his ultimate goodness.

As a character in one of my favorite novels, Dorothy L Sayers's Gaudy Night, said of another character (paraphrased), "if I should once give way to him, I would go up like straw." And indeed she does. Aziraphale does too- once he opens himself to fully trust Crowley he can feel that sense of peace and security between them, and fall right into it, in a way that Crowley, who's been working so hard to establish it up until then, can't really. Crowley's been on edge for so long that he can't take anything for granted; Aziraphale can.

[onyourowndaisymae]

an unofficial pact mark

content + warnings: fluff, implied romantic simeon x reader but can be read as platonic, minor mentions of jealousy, mc has visible pact marks, mc is tattooed, simeon and mc decide that simeon needs a pact mark too

word count: ~ 800

an angel's wings were always a sight to behold.

there's a fluffiness to an angel's wings that a demon could never quite have. not even lucifer, birdlike as the remnants of his fallen angelhood were, could compare to the sheer weightless charm of the fluttering appendages.

simeon's boyish giggle rang through the open field. a breeze blew through the celestial realm, rustling grass and clothes alike. his cloak was draped over your shoulders, ornamental jewelry clanking like windchimes as your chest shuddered with laughs. the two of you shifted again to put his back to the breeze.

"oh dear, this wind certainly isn't helping."

"don't worry! we'll get the photo!"

you lift the camera up to your eye again. like a sunset or twinkling stars through stacked lenses, the camera can't ever truly capture the radiance of his wings.

they're large, much bigger than you anticipated, fitting for an archangel like him with it's imposing wingspan casting an equally impressive shadow among the wildflowers. rows of fluffy feathers stack on top of one another to create a bountiful expanse of pure white beauty. they rustle unconsciously against the wind. they are such a graceful extension of the angel you loved-- although he was a little bashful to have such interest for a part of himself he usually kept tucked away, simeon lets you gawk as much as you wanted between attempts to get the perfect reference shot.

but back to the issue at hand.

it became apparent to you somewhere along the line that simeon was a bit jealous of your pact marks. something about the brothers having a sort of claim over you made the angel frown, gaze tracing over the visible marks with displeasure when you sat together watching movies at purgatory hall. it was even longer before he voiced this to you. it wasn't so much that he didn't want you to be close to the others-- although sometimes maybe it was like that, even if he didn't say it-- simeon was jealous of the way they all got to leave their mark on you without him. angels didn't make pacts like demons, so there was no physical proof of simeon's devotion to you.

seems unfair. he'd never complain to you about it, though, because there wasn't anything you could do about it. ... right?

silly supernatural creatures. their minds always went to extraordinary solutions of magic and sorcery. never once did they consider some of the more "primitive" solutions to their dilemmas, but that's what you were there for.

click!

the shutter snaps loudly. you pull back and glance at the screen. it's blurry, like all the others, but that's not anyone's fault. the radiance of his supernatural features is hard to capture on film, magical or not-- there was simply no way you'd get a clear shot... but the one you got was pretty cute.

he's grinning, hand up to cover his eyes from the sunlight permeating each inch of the heavenly realm. his wings are outstretched into the empty field, blurred by angelic magic on the camera, but clear enough to recognize as his own. you can't help but smile. it's a good picture. you can already picture your tattoo artist filling in the blanks with delicate shading and shapely linework.

"i think we've got it."

simeon wades through the field to curl up against your side, resting his chin on your shoulder.

"it's a little blurry... will that be good enough?"

"we'll make it work."

a call, a wad of cash, that blurry reference photo, and a quick visit to the human world later-- you had a makeshift pact mark to show your favorite angel.

the pain of the needles had long since ceased, leaving your skin to heal through time and various unscented lotions. the pain was not new to you, yet each new tattoo always drew "ooo"s and "ahh"s from those closest to you. this time, it's simeon gawking over you, gloved hands carefully holding your arm and grinning at the delicate lines embedded in your skin.

"gorgeous," he murmurs.

the tattoo didn't capture the full grandeur of his wings. that wasn't the artist's fault-- nothing could replicate the vision of seeing his beautiful wings in person. but the inked image on your inner bicep clearly pleased the angel next to you.

"now i always have you with me, too," you coo quietly, not wanting to interrupt how deeply he's admiring the art on your skin.

"did it hurt?" he asks.

"a little. but nothing i can't handle."

his thumb rubs against the nearby skin. the grin on his face is contagious-- now you're smiling, too.

"thank you for this," he murmurs, eyes glittering in the warm light of your room. "i can't tell you how much it means to me."

you can't help but press a soft kiss against his temple and nuzzle in close, rubbing your nose against his cheekbone to make him laugh.

"anything for my favorite angel."

[avelera]

Along the lines of, "Fanfic Writers Always Get the Sequels Wrong Because They Just Keep Remixing What They Have and Focusing on the Romance", here's my predictions for Good Omens S3:

My Fanfic Brain: Aziraphale does his best to stop the Second Coming but realizes he's outmatched when the other archangels gang up on him. Cornered and without hope of getting the important information/McGuffin he's acquired to the people (ie, Crowley) who need it in order to stop the next Apocalypse, Aziraphale is forced to face his greatest fears and Fall from Heaven. He shows up at Crowley's door, broken and singed, and together they reunite to stop the machinations of Heaven and Save the Day. I literally do not not care about any other shit that happens but I hope we find out that Angel Crowley was someone Powerful and Important, possibly Raphael. The End.

My Realistic Writer Brain: We open up 3-4 years later after the events of Season 2. The antipathy between Crowley and Aziraphale has had a chance to metastasize to the point that they are now Bitter Exes. As per Pratchett and Gaiman's hints at what 668: The Neighbor of the Beast would contain, Jesus Christ descends from his silver plane in America, surrounded by secret service, and goes missing. Now, both Heaven and Hell are looking everywhere for the missing Son of God. After a stint of trying to track Jesus down on his own (and also trying to sneak glances at porn while on Earth, Aziraphale reluctantly teams up with Crowley, who he has humorously reencountered, and Aziraphale and Crowley end up on a comedic roadtrip across America in search of him, filled with Bitter Ex energy, Aziraphale convinced that he can Fix Things if HE gets to Jesus first, Crowley committed to a replay of the first Canceled Apocalypse, not sure what he'll do but committed to stopping it.

The two grow close again over the course of this adventure, other wacky hijinks ensue and if Avelera is very lucky, the Long Night of the Soul beat will include Aizraphale being forced to Fall once he learns the full extent of Heaven's machinations and we'll learn that Crowley used to be Hot Shit as an Angel, but there is no actual guarantee on either front. The ultimate goal will appear to be Burn Down the System of Heaven and Hell to Save the World but since this is also a Pratchett work, and Pratchett is a great lover of Systems and Civil Society, it's more likely that Aziraphale's conviction that Heaven can be Fixed and Crowley's conviction that it needs to all be avoided and/or burnt down is actually a Debate, and we end up with some sort of happy medium between the two. Then they retire to the South Downs. The End.

[theonevoice]

Rumination n. 6 - It was all Jim's fault

Well, not all his fault. He walked right into a 6000yo situation of unspoken "do I... would you... could we...", but I think, since he fills the role of comic relief, we are not fully taking into account his impact on the whole ineffable miscommunication mess.

Because he is not just a plot device, he is a character that pushes Aziraphale and Crowley to act in unplanned ways and - most of all - brings some of their worldview biases and traumas out of their dark corners. And I am increasingly convinced that his presence plays a major role in the final breakup, acting as a catalyst for their millennia-long misalignment of hopes and fears.

Sure, he is there to make us smile and Jon Hamm is a joy to watch (I cannot get to his line in ep 1, when Aziraphale tells him that he can see that he's naked, and he goes "Oh! Well, what do you know? Ahahah!" without burst out laughing, even after countless rewatches), but that humor is mainly for us viewers to detect. From Aziraphale's and Crowley's point of view, he doesn't appear as funny as he does to us. For them, he is a source of worry and danger, and I would argue that he is also an incarnation of different desires. And that's the point.

Let's consider for a moment Aziraphale's perspective. He sees his former boss, "most holy archangel" Gabriel, pop up one day at the bookshop, reduced to the mental capacity of a smart dog, vaguely aware that someone was planning to do "something terrible" to him. It is a terrifying spectacle to behold. It's not just the mere danger of having one of the most powerful entities in the universe, possibly still in posess of all his powers, acting like a child. It's the terror of witnessing what Heaven can do to your identity and your mind: imagine Aziraphale - book-lover, diary-writer, Antichrist-locator Aziraphale with the capacity, as per the book, to solve math problems that only people with Nobel prizes could master - trying to process the idea that his former boss doesn't know the alphabet anymore. The idea that he could be reduced to that degree of utter ignorance and unawareness if Heaven decided that their truce is over.

At the same time, what Aziraphale sees is that, once stripped of all the layers of Heaven's legalism, Gabriel is legitimately a great guy. 

We all love Muriel to death, of course, but the more I watch s2 the more I believe that Jim is the most similar "angel" to Aziraphale out of all the ones we see. He is jovial (think at whatever that cheeck squishing thing is that he does during the ball), he is enthusiastic (think at his reaction at his first sip of hot chocolate, and also his genuine "hurray! Let the bookselling commence!"). He is affectionate and open about it ("You're funny, I love you"). He is caring (sure he was struggling to read the room during the demon attack, but still in that moment of danger he has the altruism of thinking to ask if anyone wants hot chocolate, and hot chocolate is the symbol of comfort for him, it's the first thing Aziraphale offers to him to make him feel at ease in the bookshop and the thing that Crowley brings him to soothe his angst after the memory conversation). He is helpful or at least he wants to be (rearranging the books in an order that, if you think about it, follows the criterion of medieval manuscripts illuminators, who usually embellished only the first letter of the first sentence on a page, which makes sense as a frame of reference for an angel whose only experience of books probably goes back to some old Bibles). He is generous and brave (giving himself up without a second thought when he realises that Shax is threatening Aziraphale and all the others because of him). 

As Jim, memory-wiped Gabriel is both Aziraphale's worst fear and his deepest hope: that after all Heaven is the side of good, that all the cruelty and the callousness and the total blindness to the value of life on Earth is just a mishap, that if you scrape off the absurd obsession with World Ending Great Plans you will find underneath a form of good that is pure and gentle. I think Jim, way more than the Metatron and his shitty offer-threat, is the main thing that brings Aziraphale back on the mission of fixing Heaven, "making a difference," not for the greater cosmic good, but to create a safe place for him and Crowley. So they can be safe together.

But something similar happens from Crowley's point of view. He also sees Gabriel as the concrete manifestation of both his worst fear and his deepest desire. The former Supreme Archangel renews the momentarily forgotten awareness of what Heaven and Hell can do to you if you cross them: destroy you either by throwing you into hellfire or holy water, or now by hanging the threat of the Book of Life above your head. Force you to live in a constant state of danger, pressing you against the possibility of your non-existence, making you feel like you have a loaded gun constantly placed against your skull and no magic trick to avoid the bullet.

At the same time, just as Aziraphale, what Crowley sees is that, if you are determined and lucky or maybe just inconsiderate, you can get away from Heaven and live your happy thoughtless life on Earth. Think of how bitter he is when he confronts Jim in ep5, calling him Gabriel and "Oh, yeah yeah, no no no. You're Jim now. Got everything just the way you want it?" I think here Crowley is projecting his desire to be "on the lam having a wonderful time and never be seen again." Sure, everyone is after him and they had to perform a joined miracle to hide him, but let's not forget that Crowley was not doing it to save Gabriel, he was doing it to keep Aziraphale safe. From his point of view, Gabriel did it: he run off, cut ties with Heaven, settled in his little neat new identity, cared and protected, not a thought in his head. And yes, Crowley is painfully aware of how awful it is to have your memory erased - I don't think he would consider it an acceptable price to pay for freedom. But still, Gabriel did what he would like to do. And it does not help that memory-wiped Gabriel presents specifically to Crowley some aspects of his personality in which he can recognize himself. He is curious and asks questions (think of the gravity conversation), and even more important he is ready to dispute the answers that are given to him ("but they don't stay where I put them"). He hears the plan about Nina and Maggie that Aziraphale didn't listen to, and afterwards asks Crowley how it went. He is insightful in his own instinctive way (when he tells Crowley "you're really nice" he's not just saying "you are nice a lot" but also "in reality you are nice", he's seeing through Crowley's rough mannerism even if just seconds before he was angrily shouting at him). He has lost his memory, which by now I think most of us agree it's what also happened to Crowley, at least partially ("I know, looking at where the furniture isn't"). And then, the final nail on the mirror-coffin: Gabriel run away from Heaven for his love. They run off together.

Having Jim right there, in front of his very eyes, I think it's the thing that pushes Crowley back to his old plan of running off together with Aziraphale: he is the living prove that it can be done, further confirmed by his final departure with Beelzebub. Of course, for a brief moment both sides of the metaphisical universe where hunting him down, which is not desirable. But Gabriel was the Supreme Archangel after all, it's only fair that they're looking for him. They are but a former bullied angel and a former already-replaced demon, maybe Heaven and Hell would not mobilised their hosts for them. They could be finally safe together.

So, when you put everything together, I think that what happened at the end of ep6 has more to do with Gabriel and how his presence affected them during the season, than it has to do with the Metatron, or even with the Nina-Maggie foil. It is Jim that pushed a wedge into the thin crack that had always been there, separating what each of them sees as the best way to be safe together.

[marie-m-art]

A recurring feature that I like in Neil Gaiman's and Terry Pratchett's stories is the mundane and ordinary juxtaposed and blended with the extraordinary and fantastical.

There's a lot of humour derived from this, but it got me wondering if the concept also works as a theme under the surface of the humour, so I'll explore that idea a bit here with examples from Good Omens and Discworld.

First a look at the humour side, because it's fun, and so that people know what I'm referring to:

-In the opening sequence of Good Omens S1E1: an angel and a demon (fantastical beings) are conversing like ordinary people, using idioms like "Well that went down like a lead balloon", against a setting of biblical proportions.

-The Archangels' meeting in S2E6 discussing first the Second Coming ("Nah!"), and then next on the agenda is the cleaning roster.

-The visuals of heaven and hell in general - it's the subversion of expectations on what these places "should" look and function like - offices, clipboards, contracts, bureaucracy. This is humour and seems like theme/motif at the same time; the visual cues say a lot about heaven and hell and their role in this story.

-Death from the Discworld books owns an umbrella stand and a hairbrush, likes kitty cats, and rides a white horse named Binky.

-In Small Gods, the Great God Om is incarnated as a tortoise:

And it came to pass that in that time the Great God Om spake unto Brutha, the Chosen One:

'Psst!'

Next, looking at the concept's thematic or metaphorical potential.

The following excerpt gets me thinking about how people put outsized importance on mundane things, and about normalcy bias kicking in when a narrow mind is confronted with extraordinary events.

From Good Omens book (about RP Tyler):

It is a high and lonely destiny to be Chairman of the Lower Tadfield Residents' Association.

[…]

Your car is on fire.

No. Tyler just couldn't bring himself to say it. I mean, the man had to know that, didn't he? He was sitting in the middle of it. Possibly it was some kind of practical joke.

Next, a scene that makes me think about retreating into the mundane to cope, after being confronted with an extraordinary event.

From Good Omens S2E6:

Nina: Oh, God, I should've been open half an hour ago.

Maggie: How can you think about that after all this??

Nina: People need coffee, I sell coffee, it's my coffee shop.

And next, thinking about how the minutiae of the everyday distracts us from paying enough attention to big world issues (a bit of normalcy bias again too). 

From Good Omens book (when the horsepersons of the apocalypse arrive at the airbase):

No one stopped the four as they purposefully made their way into one of the long, low buildings under the forest of radio masts. No one paid any attention to them. Perhaps they saw nothing at all. Perhaps they saw what their minds were instructed to see, because the human brain is not equipped to see War, Famine, Pollution, and Death when they don't want to be seen, and has got so good at it that it often manages not to see them even when they abound on every side.

Next, two excerpts from Discworld books. At first I was thinking along the lines of needing to focus on the everyday because we can't spend all our time focusing on big existential stuff, or, how we take the wonders of nature for granted because of busy lives; but then I realized, I think it's actually a clever inversion of what we consider to be ordinary - that just being alive, against all odds, in the vast universe, is actually quite extraordinary.

From Small Gods:

And one of [the brain's] functions is to make the miraculous seem ordinary and turn the unusual into the usual.

Because if this was not the case, then human beings, faced with the daily wondrousness of everything, would go around wearing big stupid grins […] And no one would do much work.

Gods don't like people not doing much work. People who aren't busy all the time might start to think.

Part of the brain exists to stop this happening. It is very efficient. It can make people experience boredom in the middle of marvels.

[more going on in the above than just the subject of the post, but I'm narrowing the focus here]

From Hogfather:

THERE IS A PLACE WHERE TWO GALAXIES HAVE BEEN COLLIDING FOR A MILLION YEARS, said Death, apropos of nothing. DON'T TRY TO TELL ME THAT'S RIGHT.

"Yes, but people don't think about that," said Susan. Somewhere there was a bed …

CORRECT. STARS EXPLODE, WORLDS COLLIDE, THERE'S HARDLY ANYWHERE IN THE UNIVERSE WHERE HUMANS CAN LIVE WITHOUT BEING FROZEN OR FRIED, AND YET YOU BELIEVE THAT A … A BED IS A NORMAL THING. IT IS THE MOST AMAZING TALENT.

And a quote from Terry Pratchett himself, inverting ordinary/extraordinary (the whole video is great, by the way):

Within the story of evolution is a story far more interesting than any in the Bible. It teaches us amazing things: that stars are not important - there is nothing interesting about stars. Street lamps are very important, because they're so rare. As far as we know there's only a few million of them in the universe. And they were built by monkeys! Who came up with philosophy, and gods.

He also mentioned here that his impression after reading the Old Testament was: "If this is all true, then we are in the hands of a madman!" Off topic again, but relevant to some of what went into Good Omens I think.

Not sure if I've proved anything here, and that wasn't the goal, but it was fun to find some quotes for my brain to play around with!

[the-hellhounds]

The night had dawned upon the territory of the hounds and the gates were open once more for the spookiest night of the year. Houses were decorated with scary and horrifying decorations, pumpkins led up along the walkways and up to the front porches.

The night had begun, and a new fear was soon to appear.

Screaming around the house as Minjun was ready to trick-or-treat with his uncles, his dalmatian onesie already on, and his candy bag wagging around in his hands.

"Do we really have to give candy away? Can't we just keep some?" Sunwoo asked as he laid on a couch, his grim reaper costume hiding the snacks he had snagged from Jake.

"Yes," Hanbin curses when archangel wings get stuck on a fake spiders web. "We need to show the city people that we mean no harm... and that we're somewhat normal."

Sighing, Sunwoo watches how Minjun ran out of their house and possibly towards Jaemin, which was lighting up more carved pumpkins.

"Ready?" Sua asks Nikki, sensing the omega's nervous gestures all afternoon as they had gotten ready together. "You took some of my pills. You should be fine for the night," She tries to reassure her.

"Yeah... I should be..." The omega mumbles, looking down to her shoes and fixing her hat as she follows Sua outside.

"Please stop looking at the poor pup," Hyuck muttered to Taeyong as he eyed Nikki's twin sister who had come to help them all with the trick-or-treaters.

The hybrid always striking a cord to Taeyong's heart and his nether regions whenever she was near.

Clenching his jaw, he readjusted his seat on the porch he shared a space with Hyuck and Johnny. "I can't help it. That guy is onto my pup. I can't let some guy steal my pups' love."

"You know," Johnny chirped in as he walked outside with another bowl of candy. The first few trick-or-treaters cheering as he handed them some. "He did say to leave her alone." He says with a toothy smile as he waved to a ghost kid run off with his friends.

"And the guy seems dangerous." Hyuck noted as he looked around to see Minjun with Jaemin and Chenle. His mind easing up from where his child was.

Grunting, Taeyong's eyes suddenly turned red. Scaring a few kids as they screamed and smiled at him. "She's just so precious..."

"Stop it, Gollum," Hyuck teased as he growled at some kids. Scaring them and laughing as they ran off to the next house.

"And Lisa and uncle Kyu took me to the zoo and told me to not tell mommy and papa and told me that they would buy me ice crweam!" Minjun blabbered out as he held Jeno's hand. Not seeing the two hounds' eyes widen in confusion.

"So that's why Sua asked me if he was at mines," Jaemin muttered from next to Chenle.

"They really are out here kidnapping a baby hound instead of making one?" Chenle shook his head as he spun his fake wand around his fingers.

"Hey, Min? How about you go play with the fog machine?" Jeno asked the toddler, fixing his dalmatian onesie and giving him one of his kind smiles.

"Yay!!" Running off with his candy bag, Minjun dodged some princesses on his way.

"Man, I wish I was a kid again..." Chenle sighed watching the toddler be as happy as ever.

Turning to his friends, Jeno looked more serious in his skeleton fit. "Have any of you noticed that half our pack have been looking..."

"Half awake?" Jaemin continued his sentence.

"So you both noticed too?" Jeno asks, seeing both Chenle and Jaemin nod. Staring at them as he couldn't figure out why half their pack was always sleeping more than usual. He gets a tug on his elbow that makes him turn to find Sua and Nikki with pale faces.

"Have you seen Minjun?" Sua asks. "We can't find him!"

"Oh yeah, he's by the fog machine," Chenle points over to one of their houses that had fog machines lined up to create an eerie pathway up to the front door.

Turning their heads to where he pointed out to, they find the walkway empty, and Kun passed out on his rocking chair.

"Shit!" Jeno cursed as they ran over to find a candy bag on the ground. Minjun's glow stick attached to it.

Feeling her heart go into overdrive, Sua's eyes darted all around for her baby. "MINJUN!? MINJUN!" She yelled, running away in search of the baby hound.

"He's going to kill me..." Jeno whispered as he lifted the candy bag up. Dreading what was to come if they don't find Minjun before Hyuck finds out.

Where's Minjun? 😭 🔥 : @badbf-cb ( lisa ♥︎ ) - @fantasyaespa ( ningning ♥︎ ) - @raiden-oc ( 🌺 ♥︎ ) @monsterhigh-cb ( jaemin ) - @livealittleoc-cb ( jay & ace ★ × ♠︎ ) - @dc-heroes-cb - @kavengers-assemble - @multi-esme

[tmwcs]

S E 7 E N : R E CK O N I N G P A R T 2 W O

WARNINGS: Demonic imagery in this one, mentions of angels killing off humans, battles between archangels and angels, shapeshifting, not so much gore but some action and thrilling scenes. i think that's it. nothing too extreme. As usual....not proofread...but good visual imagery in this one!

All the gifs were found on google, i know some of them belong to the blog Heeseunq <- click. A couple of them I found on google but could not open up the page, so i can't link their blog. If you are or know of the owner, please let me know so i can credit them. Enjoy!

You remained kneeling as you watched each metallic figures closing in. Trembling, you reminded yourself to breath steady as your eyes, despite being glossy, remained emotionless.

‘Just….get this over with….kill me now….I am afraid….but not of you…..I don’t know if I’m even afraid of the pain that will be inflicted on my body….since I can’t escape it…I’ve accepted it.….however, what I am afraid of…..is the future of my family…the innocent people under the brutality of this corrupt cult….this government that caters to them…….Mom…Dad……please take care…..I love you….’

A few hundred feet away, they took their pounding steps, one by one, coming closer….yet they didn’t move fast enough. It was as if they were purposely moving at a slowed pace to further the dreadful feeling in your chest….

You were forced to look forward to your demise….they prolonged it…

“All who bear witness! Watch as God’s angels shall cleanse the world of sin by ridding us the witch who has plagued our holy city!” Forras yells out from atop of the high balcony.

With the loud screech of the humanoid figures that inched their way to you, you lost all sense of hope. Shutting your eyes, you cradle your breast and began to pray internally, as your line of murderers were effortlessly making their way to the platformed stage that you sat atop on. The sound of their footsteps became louder as they merged towards the platform where your body was stationed, restrained in between the two holy statues. Each step they took sounded like a metal clunk as their feet meets the pavement…

*Clunk*

‘God…..I know I’ve never been one to pray or reach out….’

*Clunk*

‘Please know…that I am not praying to you for safety or mercy…’

*clunk*

‘I never lived my life in fear….yet I know I’ve lived within the boundaries of right versus wrong…’

*Clunk*

‘I could never have imagined going down like this…..but if I have to, just please…if you hear me….please hold those accountable for the wrongful deaths of all before me….people like those men…women…and those children….people like Lily….’

*Clunk*

‘Will you watch over my family?......let them know how much I loved them….protect them…along with all of those that are confused or ridden with fear….’

*Clunk-clunk*

‘I know I’ve never been one to strongly preach your name or follow your ways….but I also know I am not an evil person….’

*Clunk-clunk*

‘If these really are your creations….if you are aware and bless what they’re doing…..please….the only mercy I ask of you as these creatures close in….they’re coming in close as I reach out to you….’

*clunk-clunk-clunk*

‘Have mercy on the people and be unforgiving to those who destroyed lives…..I believe in you….’

*Clunk-clunk-clunk*

‘In your name…Amen.’

*Clunk-clunk-clunk-clunk*

‘Mom….dad…..goodbye……..’

……………………………….

Amidst the clunks of each step, voices among the crowd yells out in gasping notion.

“Oh my God look over there! Something just dropped from the sky!”

“What is that? Is that......OH MY GOD!!! it’s an angel!”

The clunks have stopped….you opened your eyes, and slightly raise your head. Turning it to the side, you saw the form of a shadowed figure kneeling….gray feathered wings mixed with a pastel of dark charcoal black mixed in adorns its back. Much like the wings of the metallic figures, yet the smokey gray appeared much lighter in hue. Thinking back when the events of the creatures began killing off the people that were selected, you had always wondered how they could have been called angels. Was it only merely because they adorned those smokey wings? Even though, the figure off to the side of the platform, adorned the same pair, he was much darker….yet…..seemed more Heavenly.

…………

Rising up slowly, he takes on a standing posture as he emerges from the shadows of the taller buildings that hovered nearby.

Removing the hood of his cloak, you gazed on the familiar face that reassured you with a look of softness, right before he glares at the leading figure that marched the remaining creatures towards your execution.

‘….Niki….’

Take me down to the river bend Take me down to the fighting end Wash the poison from off my skin Show me how to be whole again

“Look over there! There’s another one!!”

Another voice pierces the stagnant air as the people all point and gasped.

You turn your head to look over to the opposite side and watched as another cloaked figure, adorned with wings of the same color as Niki, makes its way out from the alley way nearby. With narrowed eyes towards the row of monsters that contained every means to bring you harm, he spoke with his piercing eyes as he flared his warning stare at them.

............

‘Sunoo….’

Fly me up on a silver wing Past the black where the sirens sing Warm me up in a nova's glow And drop me down to the dream below

A series of gasps and shouts emerge once more when a sudden whoosh could be heard.

Feeling the breeze graze your skin and moving your hair, you shift your face once more to view the scene directly in front of you. Landing on a combative kneeling position, in between you and the murderous creatures, he flares his wings in full display as he raises his head and pierces his dark gaze to the shiny figures ahead. Though you only had the view of his backside and the glory of his smokey-dark wings, you recognized him and felt a sense of comfort upon seeing the three brothers.

‘…Jay…..’

'Cause I'm only a crack in this castle of glass Hardly anything there for you to see For you to see

Parallel to Jay’s frame, the leading figure screeches out an offensive tone as it pierces the ear drums of each man, woman, and child nearby that stood to watch your execution.

Furrowing his brows, Jay merely stands as he glares at the figure displaying its warcry.

Raising its arms as it morphs each limb into terrifying weapons of motorized blades and saws, it leans in and lunges, yet the very moment it took its first step, a swarm of insect’s rushes in. In a blink of an eye, the swarm scoops the figure and suspends it in the air, thrashing its body into nothing as it loses the luster of its metallic form.

The crowed is left speechless but not without gasps and screams as they scurry into nearby buildings and establishments to hide from the scene. Peering through windows and glass doors, they all continue to watch as Jay’s insects finish off the creature in mid-air.

Bring me home in a blinding dream Through the secrets that I have seen Wash the sorrow from off my skin And show me how to be whole again

Witnessing the brutality as Jay kills off the lead figure, the remaining metallic creatures all screech out their war cries as they leap and lunge forward, all taking in the same initiative as the last by morphing their extremities into massive blades.

You watched, as Sunoo raises his hand and with his ultimate power, a group of metallic angels froze in place. Shifting and jolting into crinkled motions, their hearts explode from the inside and out.

Sensing their numbers shrinking, a row of the angels screech out into the open sky. Directing their tone to the clouds that hovered above, it appeared to be as if they were….

‘Calling….’

“Senator! Look!”

One of the regulators points out as you and the brothers all witness the mass numbers of angels descending from the sky, all responding to the calls of their brethren as they come to the aid of the ones who had yet to be slain by the princely brothers.

You watched as a pair swoop in, aiming towards Jay and Sunoo, when suddenly a pair of strong hands emerge out and grabs them both by their necks.

Smashing the figures together, only bits and pieces of the metallic shrapnel remained, falling onto the pavement.

Revealing his face as the cloak drapes back at his nape, he clicks his tongue as he approaches a group that breach his presence. With both his hands, he expels the power of strength and unleashes Hell in the form of his wrath….

'Cause I'm only a crack in this castle of glass Hardly anything there for you to see For you to see

You viewed from the heightened platform as each brother took on multiple angels at a time, slaying them with ease as they used both brute force and their powers.

*Clunk-clunk-clunk-clunk-clunk!*

Hearing the fast-paced footsteps of an angel heading your way, you turned your face as you remained hugging onto your chest with tightly crossed arms, bracing yourself for the creature to slash you into bits….

The thunderous sound swooped through your ears as a large gust of a familiar force sends the strands of your hair flying. Hearing the roar of the one that caused it, you recognized that sound...that vibration…that monstrous and yet mystical growl that shook the earth to its very core….

Suddenly, a pair of strong arms embraces you, sealing in the warmth and comfort of protection and reassurance. Lifting your head, you gaze on the side profile of the one who caresses your body. That blonde hair…those sleight blue eyes….that indiscriminate tongue as he licks his lips and softly chuckles while he whispers “Good girl, Layla.”

As he maintains his hold on you, cradling you to his chest, Niki steps in front and with a swift motion of his hand, he grips the air with an empty fist. You watched as a line of angels that breached the platform, all were ridden with slurred movements. As they moved in slowed motion, the ravishes of time takes an excruciating toll as each second affected them as they rotted to the core. Crouching and slowly withering away, they succumb into a sloth like state, turning into ash as they disintegrate.

Backing up, the angels all group together as they merge into a double-row force. The row in front, morphs into an offensive shield that extends from one end of the city to the other, while the row behind remained with extended blades yet the main form of their bodies morph into something more monstrous as they lose their humanoid structure and take on a more reptilian form. The wall develops rotary blades, much like a meat grinder, with the assault row behind, they march, pushing forward in formation.

Migrating towards you, the brothers, and all who stood in their way, you watched in horror as the metallic line had every intention of running you all over and grinding you down into bits and pieces, similar to hamburger meat.

Yet you remained without fear. Watching as each brother stood before you in one straight line, standing in the center, was Jungwon.

Cause I'm only a crack in this castle of glass Hardly anything else I need to be

'Cause I'm only a crack in this castle of glass Hardly anything there for you to see

All six brothers stood by one another in a single row, displaying magnificent valor as they adorn their black attire and dark smokey wings.

Up until this moment, you thought you had witnessed the full extent of each brother’s talent as they had displayed their powers before you earlier. However, as they presented themselves combatively, facing the offensive row of the screeching metallic creatures, you watched in awe as you witness the transformation of the six Princes, each one taking on the form of something dark yet glorified in ancient wonder.

.............

“You fools….go ahead and flare your diamonds, gems, silver and gold…

For I will bestow upon you, the tales of the old.  

The sickness of GREED infects you; your selfishness follows suit. 

Stemming from the moment, you consumed the forbidden fruit. 

You yearn for money and treasure…

the sparkle of a virgin’s pleasure. 

Until you raise high, far, wide, and reaching Heaven’s height.

I watch as you strip the innocent, of their rightful birthright. 

So witness as I, Mammon, Prince of Greed, The Golden Demon and Treasurer of Hell...

Will turn your flesh into silver and gold, forever marking my story to tell.”  

 

.................

“I do pray…that ye have ol faith.

For that someday your soul shall be only, for ye Lord to take.

Yet if it comes to pass,

that ye shall commit his crimes against the innocent, youth, and virgin daughters…

Know that I, Beezlebub, Prince of Demons, Lord of the Flies,

shall cast the demons and bring forth your rightful slaughter. “

....................

"Take heed, ol’ mortal being.

For the enemy is within your own, and not at all within me.

Your neighbor kills, your sister lies,

Your kindred friend looks at you with two-toned eyes.

They speak with double tongues, split down the middle.

One speaks fondly, while the other tarnishes your name in a separate riddle.

They preach you through, with lightness on display,

Yet when all is said and done, behind ye back, deadly games will be played.

As you live in bliss, your years without regret,

So shall the be the one, who takes your life with hidden threat.

Take heed, ol’ mortal being, as I, Leviathan, The Prince of Envy, Great Serpent of the Sea, Devourer of Ships, and The Marquis of Snakes,

Will issue you this warning, to either leave or take."

.....................

"With your hearts darkened, your soul grows dim.

You commit to murder and lies, supposedly for the sake of him.

The sacred scriptures, that sustains ye WRATH,

Paints the fallen angels to eternally burn you within their grasp.

Ye force the people to cower in fear,

Using thy name, in which you smear.

Wait as the time comes, when you are rightfully sentenced,

That I, Satan, King of Wrath, The Roaring Lion, and Ruler of Lies,

Will devour your souls, as ye scream, with repentance."

.......................

"In the abyss of your hearts, your crown, and your wandering soul,

The impurities of your weakened mind, takes on its toll.

Though you were free to choose, evil versus good,

I watch as you strip and taint virgin flesh, from whence they stood.

You yearn for the waves and motions,

The screams of pleasure…

To your own advantage,

you reach limits beyond your measure.

As you relish in the forbidden desires of the Sin City,

Succumb to the depths where I, Asmodeus, King of Sodom, Lord of the Nine,

shall pierce your flesh without any pity."

...................

"You waste away, no matter clean or filth.

The gluttony of your entitlement takes form in guilt.

Through your lies, defects, and ugly masks of deceit,

You take all the rewards while you lay, as the ground never meets your feet.

Your hands polished, your skin left without callous,

you preach of bravery, yet your character is nothing but cowardice.

You become the sloth, a monster of lethargy, the most selfish among pricks.

Remain still as you were, for I, Belphegor, The Lord of Discovery, The Ruling Defector, will submerge your soul, in the River Styx."

The terrifying screams and warnings of the crowd stained the air as they hid themselves deep within every crevice in the city. Senator Forras and his regulators all watch from atop the high building, panic ridding them of all other expressions as they shouted from above, cursing your name.

Despite how much power he had gained within the city, knowing the truth of how he coordinated with the angels to doom the randomly selected, there you were….heavily protected and fought for.

Even though you carried the fragile appearance of a chained angel, kneeling as you cover yourself in a cradling position, delicate and breakable as any other person around, you were emerging victorious against the corrupt and gluttonous authorities that ruled the country. All because you were behind the guard of the most powerful beings in the universe…something Forras or his cult members didn’t’ have…and never will.

Yet you couldn’t deem yourself as the victor…not just yet. Because the moment that the six Princes shifted forms, revealing their demonic entities, the angels took on a different stance in their offensive line as they all communicated with one another. With their bodies shifting from side to side, in sync, they let out a vibrating cry into the sky, much like they did earlier. However, there was something different in the tone that they screamed out, it was ritualistic, and it came out in a calling beat.

The sun was setting, yet its light was still illuminating the city….that was, until the cries of each angel beckoned upon a greater…much larger force from above.

A giant shadow casts over the city grounds, causing everything to grow dim.

Looking up, you take notice of all the birds, they were migrating far and away from the premises. Shifting your gaze, you watched as each brother, while adorning their beastly exposed forms, all look up as they took in the sight of something that seemed to be much more powerful than the generic angels they were battling with.

Looking up, you watch as a large, shadowed figure emerges from the clouds in the sky, coming out of the mist as it towered over the tallest building. With each step it took, the earth rumbled as the bricks and beams of the city’s infrastructure falters from it’s mighty presence.  

‘…..What is that?’

The figure fully exposes itself as it draws nearer. It looked nothing like the angels that plagued the population, yet it was evident that this gigantic entity was associated with the silver metallic beings as you watched all of them levitate, flying towards the towering figure and encircling it, creating a defensive barrier around its structure.....the lore of shadows and all things that was considered evil...more so than the Devil, at least...in your eyes...he was.

You, as well as the entire population, only knew of the angels that frequented the mortal realm as they killed off the selectees every seven days. How strange that one of them would be different from the rest.

‘Is it God?.....What is it?’

Suddenly, Forras' voice could be overheard as he shouts out with a horrifying sense of excitement in his tone.

“You demons! Monsters and beasts from Hell! You and that whore cannot withstand he ultimate power of God’s greatest angel! He will destroy you much like he will send his angels to finish the job in cleansing the world and ridding it of the filth that plagues it, once and for all! Behold the archangel, Jol!”

Shuttering at the last bit of his words, you recalled the history lesson that Niki shared with you in regards to Heeseung, God, the creation of people….and the archangel that secretly despised the concept in the creation of people, and was conspiring against God to destroy them…along with Heeseung…..yet the latter had changed, and according to the brothers, it was due to you, yet you had no idea as to how.

The world came to a standstill, as you and each of the six princes watch the large form let out a powerful scream.

For a moment….you truly felt fearful, even after accepting death through the tortuous manner that the angels were prepared to relinquish on you, only to be saved and guarded by the six brothers.

Yet, all hope seemed lost, even with the each prince present, faithfully by your side as they catered around the base of the platform, preparing to fight off the archangel, all for the sake of your safety.

“I beseech you! Archangel Jol! Kill off these monsters and destroy that woman who has offended God and your ultimate power!”

Forras’s words echo throughout the city, bouncing off every building as it makes its way to the ears of the monster above.

Shifting their stances, the brothers heed the outspoken words of the Senator, and nearly took flight when the sudden shrilling scream of the towering monster was let out.

It gazed off to the side, and shrilled out once more, as if it was displeased over something. Looking over to the far end of the city, you observed how each Prince shifted their gaze in the same direction.

“Senator! Over there!”

The moment the regulator spoke out, you noticed another shadow casting over the city, however, it didn’t just dim the entire land as the archangel had done with his enormous stature. For a moment, just a split second, the entire city turned dark, pitch black even.

As they spread out in mid-flight, you squinted your eyes as you observed closely at what was coating the sky and ridding the city every bit of its light…

‘….Bats?....’

Another schilling scream emerges from the archangel, it caused your ear drums to become static with the vibrations that punctured through the drum. It was painfully loud, and you had wondered why as you shifted your gaze in the direction it was looking at.

............

From afar, you watched the familiar figure making his way over. With delicate steps, he calmly makes his way as the bats all surround the city, creating a dark ring to formulate.

You watched as he dawns his all-black apparel, taking each step in a suave manner as one hand is loosely tucked into one of his trouser pockets, while the other drapes low to his side, slightly swaying as he moved. His hair wasn’t the silver ash color as you remembered, instead, it was jet black, yet one unique feature remained that was a dead giveaway in letting you know just who it was that was approaching…

‘That lace mask…its him....he’s here…’

Each brother, while remaining in their powerful and intimidating demonic forms, all render absolute respect as they kneel and bow in the direction of the figure breaching the center of the city.

“Who is that?” The Senator inquires with his regulators, yet none of them could acknowledge the man’s identity as they never saw him before.

His face remains a mystery. A subtle side smirk births from the corner of his mouth as he looks ahead and sees you…

He sees you.

How beautiful and delectable you looked…yet he felt the pent-up rage as he takes in the sight of those awful chains that restricts your movement, trapping you to be mercilessly killed off like cattle.

Unless it was by his own hand, no one had the right to chain you up...no one. Whoever they are, once he's finished here, he had some work to do on the figures that dare to tie you down like so.

Hearing the shrilled screams once more, he shifts his masked gaze up to the enormous figure that riddled the city with fear. A wide smirk and chuckle was his only response as he observes the familiar form of the one that he knew very well.

‘Heh…so it was you….Jol….’

Rubbing the tips of his fingers together, a telepathic sense of communication was rendered as the bats, in groups of thousands, perhaps millions, go from ringing in the city, to trailing in flight towards his direction. Flying in spirals around his lithe form, a mob of darkness ensues and engulfs him. He no longer becomes visible to everyone nearby, only the merging darkness of the bats could be seen.

The bats continue to screech their calls as they create a tornado out of their flying form, slowly shapeshifting into something wild and unruly.

Just as the brothers took on mystical demonic forms, so did he….yet it became evident as to why each brother respected and acknowledged him as the ruler, and it wasn’t merely just due to his age, him being the first archangel, favorited by God, or the ruler of Hell…..

Just as the archangel Jol towered over each building, so did Heeseung…yet he appeared even taller. His humanoid body displayed the power of his shape as the muscle definition was accompanied by the blood red eyes that glared with a glow that could beam a hole right through your heart. Spiked hair trailed down his spine, all the way down to the smooth tail that led to a seared and sharply jagged point, resembling a spear, yet there were intricate sawed edges that trailed the outline of its tip.

His head resembled that of an animal, yet it had the appeal of a skull without flesh. On top his head, were a pair of sharp horns that extended towards the Heavens, paired with the black feathered wings that draped over his back. It was strange, how all the angels, even the archangel Jol, and Heeseung’s brothers carried beautiful wings that were decorated with smokey-gray and ashy colored feathers, yet with Heeseung, the pair he dawned was all black, lustrous with a shine that reflected a dark red and purple hue.

There he was, standing just as gigantic as the murderous archangel off to your side….Heeseung.... in his fearsome form.

......................

"To all you mortals, demons, angels, and Gods,

Disburse yourselves, gather in numbers, no matter even or odd.

Cast your armies of Heaven’s Guardians, led by the great captain, the archangel Michael.

Or unleash the demons of Hell, that stem the darkest souls, through scripture and tale.

One chance is all I’ll permit, go forth and bear your arms.

Gather every weapon imaginable, your spells, chants, and spiritual charms.

Take every man, woman, and child, and teach them to kill,

Exhaust all matters you can, in keeping me chained, bloodied and still.

To all you weak mortals, bloodthirsty demons, sinful angels, and ignorant Gods,

Do what you need to, as I will stand and give applause.

Let it be known, since the creation of Heaven and Hell, the birth of the Earth, Moon, and Sun,

That I have remained, and will stand victorious, no matter if you fight, defend, hide, or run.

Make every attempt you must, and cover every inch of land and water,

There’s nowhere for you to go, when I am in the mood to slaughter.

I am the fire that burns within your veins,

I am the raging beast that you cannot tame.

I am the shadow that casts the darkness in your blood,

I am the pain and pleasure in both, hatred, and love.

I am the ruthless killer, a disease that infects your soul,

I am the kind archangel, that heals your wounds, sealing every hole. 

Take your knee, and bend your bows,

God will not save you, no matter how much you vow.

Look away from my eyes, you filthy whores, and farmers of pity,

Only she who removes my mask, will be eternally worthy.

Now rattle yourselves in fear and equip yourself with prayers, as I The Devil, Lucifer, The Prince of Darkness, The First and God’s Most Favored Archangel, and Master of Hell.

Will split my crown, and birth the Goddess of Sacred Sin, the Queen of Acedia,

Eternally my muse, my beautiful desire, and everlasting mania."

............

With a roar of his own, all eyes witness the unspeakable events that occurred just from his thunderous tone….the waves of the ocean rumbling…rising to heights that could be compared to mountains.

Buildings from afar tremble and crumble down from the harsh vibrations of his echo, the sky dawns a red hue as the sun hides away in fear upon hearing the chaos and calamity in his demonic scream.

This….before the world, stood the Devil…in his full glory...ready to take on Jol...to save you....and to take you away.

C O D E D M E S S A G E

Authors note: Tomorrow......

#itsabouttogodownppl #hopeyallareready #beprepared #dontbeafraidofheelel

Taglist: @deobitifull; @solstramaii; @vampiregirl215; @nshmrarki; @enhypen14; @iamliacamila; @lisaaannna; @nikstrange; @jaehaki; @luv-enhy-skz33; @silcry @honeysjae; @crackedcameraa; @stinkmonkey ; @baekxo07 @raishaii @@yangjungwon33 @lhspeachie ; @differentchildwombat ; @prettykia ; @kimsseonu ; @stvrryhee ; @en-thralled ; @hoonzdzbl ; @yuppppp ; @jinniespuppy ; @browsehnnie ; @talesofyuan

[shellem15]

One thing I’ve seen people talking about as a possible solution to the whole gods issue is turning the gods mortal—permanently.

Remove the throne entirely. Put gods and mortals on the same playing field. This option does have one obvious benefit: if the gods are like everybody else, then the damage they can inflict is severely reduced.

But I don’t think this is as clean an answer as people think it is, for multiple reasons. My first question would be “what happens to clerics and paladins?” Now, we know that divine magic exists outside the gods, but the vast majority of clerics and paladins (aka our primary healers) get their magic from gods. I imagine learning how to harness that magic outside the gods would be a pretty steep learning curve, so removing that source of power would cause a whole boatload of issues for healthcare in Exandria.

Another problem would be the mass amounts of social upheaval due to the loss of these divine figures. Wars would be fought, communities destroyed, massive power vacuums opened— thousands would die if the gods were destroyed (or made mortal.) Not to mention, the power vacuums and violence opened up on planes other than Exandria. Celestials and angels would be leaderless and directionless, demons would be free to wreak havoc on other planes. Devils are explicitly kept in line by the Lord of the Hells, without him to control them, what effect would the resulting power-struggle have on Exandria and the rest of the planes?

My third question would be how this change would effect their domains? I don’t think it would erase them entirely, the world is here and here to stay, but much like the social upheaval I think there would be much upheaval in how Exandria functions. The domains the gods rule over would be left on their own, with no one to guide or direct them. This, I imagine, would have its own set of benefits and drawbacks.

My fourth question is, would turning the current gods mortal prevent new gods from ascending? Or would it just leave the throne open, like Ashton said. Unless the concept of godhood was removed entirely, wouldn’t this problem just repeat itself? With no guarantee that those new gods will be at all merciful or tolerant towards mortals. Additionally, I have to ask what this would mean for near-godly entities. What about Archfey, Archdevils, Demon Lords, Archangels, and other Demi-powers? Where do they fit in this new order? They give spells, have worshippers, hold powers greater than mortals could imagine. How much power is too much power to have when it is fundamental to one’s nature?

I want to take a moment to talk about a scene from the Witch, the Wizard, and the Wild One, which is run by Bleem himself and has Lou Wilson, Erika Ishii, and Aabria Iyengar as players (which you should definitely check out it’s so good y’all). Heavy Spoilers for Arc 1 ahead:

In the city of Port Talon, our heroes learn that the wizards of the Citadel have imprisoned the great spirit of the ocean, Naram, underneath the barracks out in the harbor. Naram is a gentle spirit, and has been holding back from freeing himself, because he knows that in doing so he would destroy Port Talon. Naram’s wife, Orima of the Reaching Green, is not a gentle spirit, and has been encircling the city with deadly kudzu to try to free Naram. Eursulon, one of our heroes, frees Naram but gets trapped in his place. Naram stays to free Eursulon in turn, and has a moment of decision to make. Ame, the Witch of the World’s Heart, can influence this decision. Either Naram can sacrifice himself to free Eursulon, destroying himself but sparing Citadel forces. Or, he can choose to destroy the barracks, freeing Eursulon but damming the Citadel Wizards and their forces.

Ame and Naram chose violence, and the barracks are destroyed. The scene is truly horrifying, the destruction and death extraordinary even while Naram is being as precise as he can be. He is simply too vast a being to be delicate amongst humanity, despite all his efforts. He still loves Port Talon, still chooses mercy whenever he can. He is just on another playing field entirely.

I want to note, however, that the vastness of his being doesn’t make him evil. It doesn’t make Orima evil, despite her propensity for extreme violence and antagonism towards our heroes. They think a lot like humans, but aren’t human. Their morality is not the same as ours, and that informs their actions. Naram’s destruction would have, perhaps, reduced the net violence that occurred. But it also would have removed a source of great magic and wonder from the world, one that could never have been gotten back. Who are we to destroy or change a being simply because they do not play by our rules? Simply because they act in accordance to their nature and are greater than us?

(Spoilers over)

The last question I want to ask is one more about the personal ethics in turning the gods mortal. Because if you think about it for a minute, it’s really fucked up actually. This isn’t reappropriating wealth from a rich person, this is fundamentally changing the gods’ nature. Likely by force for a lot of them. And I’m sorry, there are so many ethical issues with that.

It’s important to keep in mind, while the gods are quite human-like, they aren’t human. The gods we see in downfall are a fraction of their true power and their true selves, filtered through a mortal lens. They are messy and emotional and have complex feeling and emotions but they are also greater concepts like nature and law and destruction. You cannot separate these two sides of them, you cannot separate the mortal from the divine. To do so would fundamentally change their beings, and that has absolutely horrifying implications.

I’m reminded of a scene from the Last Unicorn, where the unicorn wakes up in a human body. She is horrified, weeping and crying about what she has lost. She can feel her body is different, it’s wrong, it’s dying around her and she can do nothing to stop it. Her mind is human and her memory of her life before fades. She becomes a unicorn again by the end of the movie, but she is forever changed. Forever burdened by knowing love and loss and pain. Something she was never supposed to know.

What would happen if you removed Asha from the Wildmother? You are being that is one with the world and knows the roots of every plant, can hear the beating of every animal’s heart, are interwoven with the mountains and the forests and the rivers and the seas. And then, suddenly, all of that is gone. Suddenly you exist solely within a body of flesh and bone, one that ages and dies, one that forgets the life before. You cannot feel the roots, you cannot hear the heartbeats, the mountains and the forests and the rivers and the seas are no longer yours. Are no longer you. Would that be more or less horrifying than becoming real, do you think?

In some ways, you are capable of changing, now. You can be anything. But you are no longer eternal. You are limited in the scope of what is you. And isn’t that another horror?

Congratulations, the gods are mortal. You’re on the same playing field, but the world has lost a great source of magic and wonder. You have changed them. I hope it was worth it.

Maybe Tishar is right. We really do love destroying things we don’t understand.

In the end, I don’t think there are any clear or clean answers here. Everything is going to be messy, there’s always going to be someone left unsatisfied. I’m just laying out my thoughts on the matter, and why turning the gods human isn’t as clean a solution as people seem to think it is.

[humbledragon669]

S1E4 – Saturday Morning Funtime Write Up P1 - Saturday (The last day of the World) up to The Fields of Megiddo

Please forgive the slight skipping ahead to get the banner for the time period, I’m a sucker for consistency and I like to start this write ups with a pretty picture so all the text doesn’t look so daunting. There’s a lot of narrative to get through in this episode, which is borne out in quick scene changes, so apologies if this write up comes across as a bit scattered. Housekeeping aside, I have something intriguing to point out in the opening scene. Captain Vincent (who in the script is described as William Shatner but seems to me more like a Liam Neesom type) records in the ship’s log that the ship is on course to Havana. Looking at the location of Atlantis on Crowley’s globe from later in the episode, I think they may have been blown somewhat off course:

But then, what would you expect from a cruise ship whose name is the medical term for an infectious disease (measles)? I do rather like the insinuation that cruise guests are so stupid as to believe the ship’s crew capable of raising an entire continent from the deep, complete with its citizens, purely for their entertainment though. Light-hearted as this scene is, it serves as a neat little bridge from the previous episode, where the last thing we saw was the consequences of Adam coming into his power, albeit in unexpected ways. It sounds like the voices are getting stronger and clearer for him now too, seeing as we’re able to make out words and full sentences this time around. And if we were at all unclear as to what exactly Adam’s powers consist of, he spells it out for us, his earnest words underpinned by come creepy child choir soundtrack to really hammer home their meaning:

What I say I true.

Just in case there was any doubt about the intelligence levels of the cruise guests, we have another little dig here in the form of a Facebook post by one of them.

The long-lost continent of Atlantis has suddenly appeared out of nowhere, which means the ship can’t go anywhere, but don’t worry – the Captain has sent a bottle of Champagne to make up for it. Cretin.

For those amongst you who aren’t native to the UK (or don’t watch the news, and honestly who would blame you), the newsreader in this scene is an actual newsreader (rather than an actress playing one) called Kirsty Wark. I think little things like this are really important to contributing to the charm and appeal of the series – it blurs the lines between the story and reality, but also really assists with the show’s relatability.

So, elephant in room question. Questions actually I think.

Why is Gabriel on Earth?

Why is Gabriel jogging on Earth?

Why is Gabriel jogging on Earth where Aziraphale is?

Why is Gabriel jogging on Earth where Aziraphale is, which also happens to be the place where Aziraphale and Crowley had their break-up the night before?

These are all questions I had from the very first watch of the show, and it’s never addressed. I just can’t get my head around any of it, perhaps because I get hung up on wondering if Aziraphale came back to the park or whether he’s still there from the night before. Maybe waiting to see if Crowley will come back. After that I’m not capable of thinking of much else in a logical way because that is just too angsty. What we do know is that Aziraphale is still nervous – he’s wringing his hands. Not nervous enough to not look intrigued by the human interpretation of an angel’s appearance though. Almost so intrigued he misses Gabriel. I can’t quite work out whether his expression says he’s surprised to see the archangel or whether he’s just spurred into action. If it’s the former, then I think we really are in the “Aziraphale has been hanging around the park all night pining” territory. If it’s the latter (which, I’m inclined to think it is, the directions in the script state that he’s looking for someone at this point), I’d really like to know how he knew Gabriel was going to be there in the first place. Either way, I really love the way that Aziraphale starts this conversation in the exact same way that his phone conversations with Crowley usually start (“It’s me.”) – it’s such a casual way to start a conversation, mostly reserved for situations where there is a level of familiarity between the participants that betrays how comfortable they are with one another. It’s also a very human interaction, one which Gabriel does not appear able to understand the nuances of – after all, it is a pretty obvious thing to say isn’t it?

I have to call attention to the level of detail that has gone into the production of this series here, and this time the credit goes to the costume department. They could have had Gabriel running in a very plain set of running clothes, but no – they had to go and add a little hint to his true nature, embroidered right there on his sweater:

So subtle, but it just goes to show how much thought went into every single aspect of this show. It might not be an intricately detailed suit, or a deliberately distressed demon outfit, but this tiny detail is still capable of reminding us of the true nature of the characters we’re watching.

I’m fairly sure that Gabriel’s assertion that the purpose of war is so that they can win it is probably the main reason why most wars are fought. Which is, quite honestly, batshit crazy. Gabriel doesn’t think so though – he can’t understand what Aziraphale’s problem is with this ridiculous catch-22 situation, oblivious to our angel’s very obvious distress:

I find the use of the word “soft” here interesting. I think the meaning of the word in Aziraphale’s mind is very complicated – he’s not really talking about his lack of physical prowess (not my opinion, just reiterating what Gabriel so hurtfully said previously) but his attachment to Earth as a whole, which would no doubt be perceived by Heaven as having gone “soft”. The irony is that his “softness”, perceived at this point by him and others as weak, is exactly what draws us to him as a character, forming an essential part of his make-up as a hero character.

Moving on, it looks like Lesley (the International Express delivery man) is quite the foreshadower of his own fate.

Ours is not to reason why. Ours is to deliver packages.

I’m sure most people will know that the way the second part of this line should end is nothing to do with delivering packages, but should instead be “to do and die”. It’s a very well-known quote, even if it is slightly altered from the original, from Tennyson’s Charge of the Light Brigade, underlining the fact that soldiers should not question the purpose of their service, only to perform their duties and give their life when necessary. Which is exactly what Lesley is about to do with his deliveries, even if he is ignorant of the fact that he’s been drafted as the harbinger of Armageddon.

Quick note: I love that view from Heaven! It’s another one of those little things that you only see for a moment, and if you’re not concentrating, you might think it’s just any old cityscape but let’s take a quick inventory, shall we?

From left to right:

The Eiffel Tower.

Big Ben.

Mountains.

Empire State Building.

The London Eye.

The Shard.

Pyramids.

There are maybe some others (in a later shot you can also see what looks like St Paul’s cathedral), but you get the idea – there’s no way that all of those things could be in one view - some of them are in different continents to each other. It’s a pretty cool view though, I wonder if you can Airbnb up there?

We now have the first firm indication that things are getting tricky for our hero pair. “Earth observation files” you say? That sounds decidedly problematic. I do love how Gabriel genuinely seems to think there would be an innocent explanation for an angel and demon to have met multiple times, though in his defence none of the photos he is presented with show the pair with anything other than neutral expressions. What this exchange does inform us of is that the suspicions surrounding Aziraphale have only been incited owing to his recent comments – he really has been fooling them completely for the last 6000 years, and even when they do catch on Michael’s first thought is that he’s a double agent. Not a bad record if you ask me. I think it’s pretty spiteful of Michael to turn Crowley in to Hell at this point – they must know that he’s not working for Heaven, and would be aware that Hell are probably going to take an even harsher stance towards any descent in the ranks they suspect.

Here we go, another (side) note of appreciation (it’s easy to rack these up when the emotional angst isn’t so high). I don’t know whether the chameleon on Ligur’s head is an animatronic prop or CGI, but the fact that it moves, seemingly independently, is yet another beautiful detail that is easy to miss.

Back with Crowley, we find out that he’s still intending on running. It’s here that we find out that he had a hand in creating some of the component parts of the universe, and we have the first mention of Alpha Centauri as being a favoured destination. It feels like an obvious statement to make that the choice of this particular constellation was owing to it being made of two words starting with “A” and “C” but Neil has been asked this question before and stated that its use was purely circumstantial. I’m not sure I fully believe that but maybe that’s just me. My heart goes out to Crowley in this scene – he looks truly defeated. So defeated that he actually tries to reason with God in a tone that could be described as pleading. And in contrast to Gabriel’s description of the reason for Crowley’s fall (that he was one of the rebelling forces against Heaven), we see here that Crowley’s take on the situation is quite different.

Four episodes in and we’re still being introduced to new characters – hello, Pollution. We are given some backstory about why this Horseman isn’t the traditionally-known Pestilence, and I think I read somewhere that this was a conscious substitution made by Neil and Terry to make it feel more relevant/current but I can’t find that source now. Interestingly, the name for the recipient of the crown is given on the delivery form as “Mr. White”, but Lesley refers to them as “Chalky”, a continuation of the theme that there are many names for each of the Horsemen, all of which allude to the same thing.

I find white to be an interesting colour association to make with Pollution – many of us would associate it with cleanliness and purity, the complete opposite of what this Horseman stands for.

Lesley’s final delivery instructions are communicated in a handwritten note:

He is clearly aware of the connotations of this delivery, leaving a note for his beloved Maud. Quite why he doesn’t just “fuck this shit” at this point is a mystery to me – I certainly would have done. Perhaps it’s a callback to his Tennyson quote from earlier. I do find myself wondering if he might have avoided Armageddon himself if he had just done the sensible thing though – after all, he has been (unknowingly) tasked with summoning the Horsemen of the Apocalypse, without which there can be no Armageddon. What if he had just refused to make the last of his deliveries? Regardless, the sequence representing his death shows firstly the colour starting to bleed out of the footage before he dissolves into starlight – a recurring theme in Neil’s work.

On to lighter things now – here’s Anathema doing that creepy thing of offering virtually unknown children food again. I love how Bryan’s initial concern about the chocolate is that he thinks it’s coming from a witch. Never mind “stranger danger”, what you really have to watch out for is those witches. Sounds like he’s well suited for a position in the Witchfinder Army.

It’s not unexpected that Shadwell has Jerusalem playing in his (gross) apartment, I think he probably plays that recording on a loop so as to continue feeding his delusions that his insanity is driven by a deep love for his country. The particular line of the song playing here (“in England’s dark Satanic mills”) is pretty well-timed though, seeing as it won’t be long until everything in England has a distinctly devilish tone to it. There’s also an irony to Shadwell’s farewell:

May the armies of glory march beside ye.

I don’t really think that’s a good idea, seeing as how they’re perfectly comfortable with wiping out the entire human race for the sole purpose of winning an argument…

There’s another throwback to Adam’s imagination becoming real in the next scene, with the UFO that Newton witnesses having the same design as the one we saw hanging from Adam’s bookcase earlier in the episode:

And I love the use of the theremin in the soundtrack – nothing screams an old school UFO and aliens more than the sound of a theremin!

Side note: the mention of a “neuter” gender by the alien is in the original book, written in 1996. I hope I’m not being offensive by crediting Neil and Terry with being massively ahead of their time in their support of the LGBTQ+ community there, and applaud them for being beacons of what we should all aspire to be.

Secondary side note: anybody else get Douglas Adams vibes from this alien conversation? For me it really conjures memories of a different universe where an alien race showed up to destroy Earth to make way for a new hyperspace bypass…

We’re back with The Them, with Wensleydale kindly reminding us that whales have big brains, for the third time in this series. I think it’s fair to say that we should be aware each of the children have their own distinct personalities, given the scripting and acting that we have seen up to this point. If we were in any doubt though, it’s really underlined by the fact that they each have a different type of ice lolly.

Again I say the level of attention to detail in this show is truly astounding. We’ll see more of it in the next scene where we see Ligur’s chameleon not only moving independently but that its skin actually cycles though a range a colours. That said, I do have a question about the information available to Anathema in the next scene:

The full prophecy on the card shows us a lot more information than is narrated in the show (like how she knew he was a Witchfinder, and that his descendant was responsible for the death of her own). What it doesn’t say is how she knows exactly the date and time of his arrival. That information isn’t even in any of the scribbled notes on the card. I guess we’ll never know how she comes to find this out.

And on that quandry, I’m going to wrap it up for this part of the episode write up. I realise it’s a slightly odd place in the episode to call it a day, but if I finish here I can use the Fields of Megiddo signpost to head the next part (told you I was a sucker for consistency). So as always, questions, comments, discussion – always welcome.

[greenthena]

Why then was this forbid? Why but to keep ye low and ignorant

(If evil, why tasty?)

In the Garden (the one in Eden, not in Tadfield or Berkeley Square), Aziraphale is tasked with protecting the Tree of Knowledge. He is, as he says, "On apple tree duty," that day when Crawly suggests to Eve that the fruit might be extra delicious, and worth a rather significant gamble.

And about that fruit...what was it that was so corrupting to humanity that they had to be cast from paradise after consuming it? Aha! You just fell victim to one of the classic blunders. You thought I was here to argue theology. Even I'm not that much of a masochist. What I will say is this, the fruit gave them knowledge--specifically, the knowledge of Good and Evil--which made them like God. In Paradise Lost, where (let's be honest) Western Christians get most of their context for the Fall of Man, Milton describes humankind's experience prior to that Original Sin as being fully Good. Good (as defined by the Almighty) is available to Adam and Eve from their conception. But Evil can only be known by disobeying God...by eating the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge. And, oh, does does that Wily Old Serpent entice Eve to eat the fruit. The Serpent's temptation is a hefty stanza, but my most particular favorite part is this,

Why then was this forbid? Why but to awe, Why but to keep ye low and ignorant, His worshippers; he knows that in the day Ye Eate thereof, your Eyes that seem so cleere, Yet are but dim, shall perfetly be then Op'nd and cleerd, and ye shall be as Gods, Knowing both Good and Evil as they know.

(Milton, Book 9, lines 703-709.)

Ah, Crawly, you did such a good job. "Get up there and make some trouble." And you certainly did.

So knowing, knowledge...theologically these are heavy themes in the Eden narrative. Once Eve and Adam partake of the fruit (oh, spoiler alert...sorry...yah, they eat the apple) their eyes are opened and they realize that they are naked and everything changes. They're exiled from paradise, never to return to the sanctuary of creation's womb.

Remember what Aziraphale was doing that day? Well, what he was supposed to be doing, anyhow... Guarding the Tree, yes? Guardian of the Eastern Gate of Eden, but also Steward of the Tree. Keeper of the Knowledge. Hold that thought; I'm going to need you to come back to it in a bit.

Crawly...well, Crowley and Aziraphale spend the next six millennia on earth addressing the assignments given by their respective Head Offices and eventually forming their Arrangement. And through this time, Crowley introduces Aziraphale to a vast array of different types of knowledge: the knowledge of what food tastes like in the definitely-not-a-temptation form of ox ribs; the knowledge of what wine does to an angel's corporation; the knowledge that he has more free will than he realizes and can lie directly to Heavens' Supreme Archangel; and, perhaps most impactfully, the knowledge that he has a friend hereditary enemy who will keep his secrets safe.

As Aziraphale experiences existence on earth, he accumulates volumes of knowledge that other angels will never have, and even begins to collect this knowledge for himself in the most human way imaginable.

He acquires books. Little storehouses of knowledge in which people express their ideas, ask questions, and perform humanity in a way that is really only possible because Eve took the apple and defied her Maker. If they'd stayed in the Garden, there would be no questions, no new ideas, no sushi restaurants, and no dusty little bookshops where angels keep their precious hoards of human knowledge.

Remember that little thought I asked you to hold onto oh, say two paragraphs ago? Here's where it fits. A.Z. Fell & Co. is the New Eden. It's a safe haven containing a vast store of knowledge guarded by the angel of the Eastern Gate. Even the physical design of the bookshop mimics the walls of the Garden.

Just as in the original Eden, where the angel gave the demon the shelter of his wing, the bookshop provides a true home for Crowley (especially in S2, when we see him consistently remove his sunglasses upon entering the shop as an act of vulnerability.)

And like God in Her Garden, Aziraphale is covetous of his Knowledge, refusing to sell his books just as the Almighty denied the breeding pair of humans access to the fruit.

(Also, I literally asked God, and She said that Aziraphale will get mad if you try to eat his books.)